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Stacy Vaeth Photography Print eBook for allContents Start Guide Chapter Is Anxiety Running Your Section Feelings Chapter Your Emotions Chapter Your Body Physical Sensations Chapter Putting the Tools to Work Section Behavior Chapter Avoidance Escape Chapter Acceptance Approach Chapter Putting the Tools to Work Section Thoughts Chapter Thoughts vs Reality Chapter Getting Unstuck from Thoughts Chapter Putting the Tools to Work Section Staying on Track Chapter The Road Ahead Chapter Building Your Support Network Resources References About the Start Guide This book provides a variety of strategies and techniques that have proven effective at reducing anxiety and its most troubling symptoms Any of the strategies you choose to practice will help your anxiety overall but divided them up here based on which type of symptom they target This Guide will navigate you straight to the set of strategies that will help you deal with acute symptom and situations Section Feelings Turn to the strategies starting here if feeling strong emotional or physical symptoms of anxiety Sadness Insomnia Mood swings Racing heart Shortness of breath Dizziness Stomach upset Section Behavior Turn here if your anxiety is making you behave in ways that you like or that are causing you problems Section
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II will be helpful when your anxiety causes you Avoid activities you used to enjoy Avoid certain people Frequently cancel plans Call in sick to avoid stressful events like presentations Feel unable to do routine things like drive or go to the Behave uncharacteristically in situations e g you approach or talk to your friends when at a party Section Thoughts Starting here find strategies to help diminish the inaccurate or unhelpful thinking that preoccupies the mind when caught up in anxiety These strategies will help if Chronic worry Repetitive or racing thoughts Catastrophic thinking thoughts g suck at this so I might as well give up Irrational beliefs g I drive back home to check the oven my house will burn down Welcome Everyone feels anxious at some I have worked with anxious clients for the past 15 years in my practice as a clinical psychologist Some come to me believing that their anxious feelings can improve Others enter therapy reluctantly mostly convinced that nothing will ever reduce their panic symptoms avoidance behavior or worried thoughts People who improve typically have two things in 1 A part of them no matter how small believes they can get better 2
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They learn and put to work effective strategies Simply opening this book and reading this far shows that some part of you believes your anxious symptoms can get better And if willing to engage with this material and give serious thought to the impact anxiety has on your life a part of you that wants to get better Take you already have all you need to start managing your anxiety symptoms and living a happier more fulfilling life How to Use This Book Psychology is a young science and still quite a bit we know However we do know how to treat anxiety Most people who consistently use the psychological tools in this book will find relief My clients who use these methods tell me that although they are still aware of their worried thoughts those thoughts no longer have the same power over them So instead offeeling as if the waves in the ocean are pulling them under and they have to fight for dear life they realize they can in a stormy sea They ride out the tempest by using their tools and knowing that the waves will eventually subside and the sea will be calm again The
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strategies in this book are simple to implement They are all evidence based meaning research has proven their effectiveness They come from cognitive behavioral therapy acceptance and commitment therapy pronounced like the word act and mindfulness practices not necessary to go through the book from start to finish in order to improve You likely have not experienced the whole range of possible anxiety symptoms described here so you may choose to skip some sections depending on what experiencing Although this is not a workbook it is full of practical strategies and instructions for how to implement them In each of the nine main chapters see sections titled Deeper which are suggestions on how to take the strategies to the next level need a notebook or journal for these The strategies are optional but they are a great way to maximize your results A NOTE TO The clients in the examples used throughout the book are composites and the names are fictional to protect anonymity Getting Started Keep a notebook or journal handy so you can jot down your thoughts about the strategies as you try them out Your notes will help you reflect on what learning and how your new
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skills can help you better cope with anxiety The more you practice and write about the strategies the faster become automatic responses to your anxiety triggers Once you have your notebook and are ready to start take a moment to think about your schedule Consider you want to work on this material and when you can best fit it into your general routine To really get up to speed with your new skills daily practice is the way to if you can set aside only a few minutes The point is give some thought to how going to integrate this book into your routine If in the middle of an acute symptom I encourage you to go directly to the relevant section So for example if consumed by worried or intrusive thinking start with section III If your anxiety is causing you to avoid important events or people you may want to start with section II If struggling with your feelings or physical health start with section I To reach goals of sustained peace of mind and inner calm consider breaking the material down into small doable steps so you eventually work through the entire book at the pace that
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suits your life CH APTER ONE Is Anxiety Running Your Why We Struggle with Anxiety A snake on a hiking trail or a gun in your face or any direct threat to your will trigger your response When this happens the sympathetic nervous system releases a cascade of hormones in particular adrenaline and epinephrine These stress hormones very rapidly cause a series of changes in your body including increased blood pressure and heart rate slowed digestion tunnel vision shaking and increased muscle tension All this prepares you for a physical response to the danger These changes come together in an instant to create a singular focus on survival When anxiety is in the case of the snake or the physiological response is normal because it prepares us to respond to the potential threat Even when the perceived danger anxiety can still be helpful For example a student might need to achieve a certain score on a test in order to be accepted to medical school His anxiety motivates him to study take a test prep course and spend considerable time on practice exams The fear of failure can energize and focus him for the hard work ahead Or a person
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driving on a busy highway suddenly experiences increased heart rate and blood flow when she sees someone screech to a halt in the lane next to her The immediate increase in heart rate prepares her for action so she can steer toward safety if she needs to These kinds of anxiety responses may not be saving our lives but they are adaptive and keep things running smoothly Anxiety becomes a problem when a response is triggered by cues that are not threatening at physically or otherwise For instance the person who obsessively worries about their health even though tests have ruled out a medical condition This person is unable to be present with the people around them because constantly preoccupied by what might or might not be going on medically Or take the person who fears using public bathrooms and eventually avoids all business travel in order to not have to confront this fear If travel is necessary for work this career will be limited or ended by what is at its core an irrational fear Anxiety just a problem of overreacting to things happening our anxiety response can be triggered by things that exist only in our minds This
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happens when we worry about and anticipate and case scenarios which may never come to be Consider the person who feels insecure and frets relentlessly about the possibility of doing something wrong socially and being embarrassed Eventually their social world becomes smaller and smaller They may no longer go to social events and may even stop opening up to people known for a long time If holding this book you likely struggle with anxiety in some way But you may still have questions about whether or not anxiety is a problem for you or about how serious a problem it is There are some general ways to assess if dealing with problematic anxiety or just the normal fears that arise in life from time to time Anxiety is adaptive when it comes in response to an fear of risk in your immediate environment Anxiety is maladaptive when it becomes a chronic state of tension worry avoidance behavior all of which negatively impacts your life and functioning The table below describes the differences between normal fear and problematic anxiety FEAR ANXIETY Fear is and generally rational in that responding to a threatening situation or event Anxiety is and can easily become
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irrational because it is untethered from real events Your imagination continually calls up scenarios in the here and now There is a fire in the house and figuring out how to put it out Once the fire is out your fear subsides You feel worry and discomfort even though you are not in immediate danger No clear threat is present and there is no clear way to solve the concern Fear comes from real threats in the outside world e g job medical illness of a loved threat of being physically wanting to do well on a specific task such as a speech or an wanting to make a good impression on new acquaintances For the most part anxiety created by the outside created by your mind You worry about possibilities that may or may not happen such if they like if the plane if I leave the movie if they hate if I have a panic if I make a fool of What We Can Do About It The Anxiety and Depression Association of America estimates that 40 millionpeople suffer from anxiety disorders which are the most common issues that bring people to therapy Thanks to decades of research
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we know a good deal about how to treat them In fact anxiety symptoms of all kinds are very responsive to treatment offering anxiety sufferers relief This book gives you access to some of the same tools I use in my practice to help people struggling with all types of anxiety symptoms The techniques in this book are taken mainly from three scientifically tested and interventions As a clinician and also as someone who struggles with anxiety I have personally found relief using these specific approaches and so have my clients I believe you will too What research and experience have shown me is that a combined approach of examining your thoughts accepting necessarily anxiety as a part of your life and learning to be more present in the here and now are the essential keys to reducing anxiety and living a more peaceful life Having anxious thoughts becomes a cycle that creates more anxiety use cognitive behavioral therapy to examine and change your thoughts Strategies from acceptance and commitment therapy will help you behave in a manner and ultimately live a life that matches your core values and desires regardless of your mood or anxious symptoms As you grow
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to accept that we all suffer sometimes find more room for you to separate from your battle with anxiety Through practicing the mindfulness strategies throughout each chapter be more easily able to bring your thoughts back to the here and now As you learn ways to observe and distance yourself even if only slightly from your anxious experiences you will be less overwhelmed and more able to experience joy and pleasure in your life now Habits and Neuroplasticity Struggling with anxiety can be so demoralizing that we give up Similar to traits like height or eye color people who struggle with anxiety can start to believe that they were born anxious and nothing they can do about it However the reality is that changes in our environment along with learning new skills have a significant impact on anxiety and can lessen anxious symptoms over time Neuroscience shows that neuronal growth and structural changes in the brain occur as the result of new experiences and also as the result of how you think and behave A example of this would be if you decided you wanted to change your habit of snacking right before bed Perhaps eaten chips or crackers before
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bed for years and you decide to substitutesliced vegetables The plan is solid and ready to go However unlikely to be successful in changing this habit if you substitute your chips for veggies only once a week or every couple of weeks On the other hand if you consistently eat sliced veggies every night of the week or even just most nights of the week your brain will adjust and the new habit will take hold When you repeat a new behavior enough continually fires the same neuronal the new experience becomes a part of your system on a chemical level This phenomenon is called neuronal plasticity or sometimes brain plasticity ASSESSMENT Tap Your Growth Potential People just like you with similar symptoms and levels of anxiety have triumphed over anxiety largely because they believed they could Recognize if you send yourself messages such as telling yourself no amount of work will lessen your symptoms Just having these thoughts can hinder your progress Take this assessment to see how much you believe in your ability to grow and have the internal peace you deserve and desire If you answer yes often plan to cultivate your capacity to believe that freedom
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from anxiety is possible 1 When told some way of thinking or behaving will help my anxiety I zone out think nothing can help or that this person get it 2 If I have to work hard at something I feel like something is wrong with me 3 I want to stay just as I am but I am unhappy where I am 4 I believe the anxious aspects of my personality that bother me are changeable through learning and new experience 5 Most of what I do is to survive and get through the day and less about what I want 6 rather stay stuck in anxiety than learn new ways of coping As you work your way through the strategies in this book you will likely start to believe in your ability to grow Revisit this assessment from time to time to see the progress making in believing in yourself In time you will look back and feel both surprised and proud of your growth UP Anxiety is a normal bodily response to threat Feeling fearful about something in your immediate environment is adaptive Imagining situations that may or may not come to pass is maladaptive Anxiety responds
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to you can and will get better The brain is able to grow and change structurally as the result of new experiences over time Believing that reducing anxiety is in your control and hard work will pay off makes all the difference You can do Learn in this Section Imagine a triangle with in one corner in another and in the third These represent the three main paths to change which lead to relief from a wide range of anxiety symptoms This book is divided into these three main sections too A change in one corner of the triangle will affect the other two If you change your learning strategies to calm your fear and anxiety in social you will likely change your thoughts I calm my anxiety I can contribute to the conversation and people will like and your behavior stop avoiding social Simply put if trying to effect change you can start with any corner of the triangle In this first section we will look at your anxious feelings both emotional anger mood swings and physical of breath heart palpitations learn better ways of dealing with your feelings and how to overcome avoiding or pushing your emotions away
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We will also see how the stress of anxiety can lead to unpleasant physical side effects such as digestion problems racing heart and chronic headaches Together we will uncover what lurks underneath your anxiety which may be the most important factor when life is disrupted by anxiety CH APTER TWO Your Emotions Are You Suppressing Your A few years back I took a genetic test to determine if I was at heightened risk for developing certain cancers I did this at the urging of my doctor who rightfully promoted prevention over treatment This thinking made sound sense to me and given that I have a family history of cancer I believed I would get the reassurance of longevity I was shocked when I was told I had an 80 percent lifetime risk of developing breast cancer average risk is 12 percent I distinctly remember thinking be there must be a mistake in the test The information was too overwhelming for me to process emotionally so I pushed it away As a result I became obsessively focused on negative thoughts about other aspects of my life I was unable to sleep most nights overwhelmed by worries and What I doing was
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acknowledging my profound sadness and grief Once I started to get in touch with the vulnerability I felt the anxiety became easier to manage The more we avoid or push away our emotions the more anxious we become This process is a learned habit that actually worsens anxiety over time in part because it reinforces anxious thoughts and driven behavior This happens because to keep the unwanted emotion at bay we have to continually work at avoidance Over time keeping up this avoidance becomes something else anxious about When we despite our best efforts drop our guard even for a moment the emotions come flooding in and we again anxiously push them away On this the original negative emotion goes unaddressed and we remain ill at ease and hypervigilant How Do You Feel Right As you learn to better identify your feelings you will gain greater emotional control This means you will be less prone to intense emotional reactions such as panic attacks emotional meltdowns blowups crying spells and worried thinking Plus knowing what feeling means you can address the real issue and feel better When upset or aware experiencinganxiety use the following chart to help you label the deeper
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that may be underneath your anxiety EMOTIONS SENSATIONS LABELS TO DESCRIBE YOUR EXPERIENCE ACTION URGES EVOLUTIONARY SIGNIFICANCE LOVE Calm body relaxed muscles sense of peace and Sense of comfort safety comfort with another passion sexual longing Desire to be with the person to bond with the other to make sure the other is okay Love bonds couples children families and tribes It is the glue that connects people PLEASURE hormones released increased energy lack of physical pain excited body Delight joy vivaciousness contentment mastery feeling lost in the moment not thinking about the future or the past Urge to smile laugh talk more with others and reveal more about yourself Pleasure is a tonic for negative emotions and motivates us to do certain things in order to experience more pleasure ANGER Tense body clenched jaw tightened muscles increased body temperature feeling of pressure behind the eyes Feeling unfairly treated or disrespected by others or the world as a whole outrage rage feeling the self is not valued Urge to be aggressive or harm another urge to yell or throw something Anger cues the body to through physical force or boundary setting SADNESS Desire to remain still feeling of lethargy and
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lack of energy difficulty getting your body to move Loss grief hopelessness rejection feeling defeated or unwanted feeling bad about the self Urge to cry or sit still in one place lack of motivation urge to dwell on what you did to cause the loss Sadness is protective in that it allows the self to mark time while grief and solving can take place ANXIETY Stress hormones released in the brain muscle tension restlessness increased heartbeat sweating shortness of breath stomachache Being worried or fearful feeling threatened by something in the environment or within a relationship of losing a being in Urge to be vigilant replay events in mind predict future events desire to control the Anxiety triggers adrenaline which puts the body into high alert primed for action and protection mode threat flee or be busy GUILT Stomachache aching muscles feeling that you be physically at ease Feeling like a person feeling destructive feeling you should be punished Urge to make amends to be a person to berate oneself Guilt keeps people in line with societal laws and norms designed for protecting people SHAME Burning sensation on face cheeks flushing stomach sinking Embarrassment humiliation exposure as a fraud fearing
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a flaw will be revealed to another or the public Urge to flee the situation to become invisible and hide oneself Shame signifies social status in a group and keeps people in accordance with group expectations EXPRESSING YOURSELF When feeling strong emotions finding a way to express those feelings can go a long way toward helping you move through them There are countless benefits in talking about our feelings with another person For example I see it over and over again in my practice that a person comes into a therapy session feeling upset or anxious They allow themselves to talk about their feelings for 50 minutes and they leave feeling significantly better Many often say too easy How can merely talking make such a The answer is that the act of talking labeling and expressing moves emotional information from your emotional brain to your frontal lobe which helps you better understand yourself and feel more in control of your emotions which makes you feel better Choose a person with whom you can discuss your feelings Try to look the person in the eyes while expressing yourself because maintaining eye contact with a supportive connection will further soothe your nervous
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