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457 | wrote doc lorazepam super hit miss month since ive used use roughly every day average ive id call roughly success rate calming anxious feeling derealization racing mind actual panic attack chest pain breathing issue feeling like going die child going die uncontrollable cry panic wothout definite source really awful derealization take mg needed havent suicidal ideation wtf id ativan drug like ability take needed long term drug therapy weords attack today damn landlord ativan worked wonder ive got raging headache wondering seems ineffective sometimes ive told response yet talk secure app take day get back thought | self.Anxiety |
458 | trying remain secure sure word im never really content insecurity always resurface force analyze im people want cool whatever anyone else ever get voice back head saying youre enough personally combat thing used think kind depression exaggeration hit like shit gotten point feel hopeless im fact know hope | self.depression |
459 | single insecure antisocial loner cant control feeling sometimes happy sometimes sad never thought committing suicide idk get super sad got good job family friend feel like everything pointless like there point im alone idk deleted | self.depression |
460 | beta blocker thyroid prescribed beta blocker booked thyroid test anyone experience beta blocker | self.Anxiety |
461 | expectation anybody else feel constant pressure live expectation goal set personally ive panic attack cause im trying teach philosophylogicpragmatism economics psychology literature time time graduate h two year | self.Anxiety |
462 | career anxiety posted rjobs well would imagine people dont get anxiety like guy basically lot anxiety career tied self worth level career success im stagnated like think must mean lousy person still individual contributor job people younger manager director vps even ceo feel like due multifaceted anxiety struggle daily basis ill never able make one position people skill leadership skill feel rotten seeing others people reporting leading entire organization dont know keep sanity mere thought level responsibility sends near panic given feel like hit ceiling career already way go back really put damper self esteem wish didnt tie self worth much | self.Anxiety |
463 | life feel like dreamnightmare feel touch reality feel like im dream nothing real like fog thick cant even put word anyone else similar feeling | self.bipolar |
464 | anyone get jaw pain due constant tenseness constant headache doctor pointed tight tense jaw edit ive depression couple year diagnosed gad recently super bad im sorta glad im one who tension headache jaw pain though could choose would gladly | self.Anxiety |
465 | dae simulate suicide spend fair amount time pretending gun mouth pulling trigger proceed lie pretending dead sometimes may use belt strangle major threshold trying imagine asphyxia would like comforting make realise switch everything discretion show enter void isnt quite scary think | self.depression |
467 | point point alive die dont remember really worth living happy sad depressed anxious time fucking miserable friend family care care seek affection someone care vice versa ive heart break past month shit fucking game peoppe done studying become doctor honestly fucking hate people fucking bother helping shit actually work lose mind keep going like happy satisfied even tho people wish could life wish would honestly aint worth | self.SuicideWatch |
468 | first post serious job anxiety wanting quit hi ranxiety first post ive dealing anxiety life started new job six week ago im going serious spiral dread going work morning poor night sleep waking multiple time night sweat racing heart im want leave watch clock time go go home cant relax im thinking go back next day weekend arent enjoyable reason im constantly nauseous stress headache hand shake time anxiety make forgetful easily distracted give serious brain fog forget act lead making mistake work panic realize mistake haste fix lead mistake compounding bos frustrated performance sat day told performance poorly affecting client business doesnt deserve employee make many error time dont deserve hate job life want quit feel terrible idea leaving soon starting cant live like im verge tear time first thought needed adjust im realizing good fit industry company coworkers nice people theyre good problem appointment see doctor monday evening first time getting treatment anxiety think may depression ocd ive googling resignation letter template day anyone else ever quit job anxiety | self.Anxiety |
469 | hella night time anxiety yeah dark im fan | self.Anxiety |
470 | going first holiday boyfriend anxious leave comfort zone advice would great | self.Anxiety |
472 | im seriously tired much past year im still undergraduate uni already lot debt fucking dumb ive part project due tomorrow partner hasnt replied text email professor class huge asshole another class im taking found isnt even required major usual money problem im sick everything hard everyone everything eays mode dumb as mistake made fucking hate life | self.SuicideWatch |
473 | tough day call work today first time panic attack nothing particular caused hard day begun im thankful sub share experience day like today dont feel like im absolutely mental | self.Anxiety |
474 | every time say there little voice saying dont matter cant anymore im sorry needed say torture dont know whats worse giving fighting whenever come reason live whenever assure going pull nice life freaking voice simply chime would though really think matter really think would able help anyone think youll get accepted good college know isnt true ampnbsp matter voice call sylvia female voice audibly mine win try fight drive edge continues give break need punish ever thinking could help someone could achieve something dont fight go right sorry forgot im waste space second haha dont argue sylvia least dont feel even worse yes feel empty numb way worst feeling ive ever experienced dont need punish dont cry tear rage ampnbsp im sure anymore see around people ive failed help see selfishness calling think people youre selfish think could change something huh selfish everything selfish literally talk someone wow youre selfish think better people could talking right dont talk someone think youre better youre selfish brat theyre sad wanted talk huh cant anything right literally everything wrong even writing wrong hear sylvia screaming selfish bother guy petty problem ampnbsp ive tried kill four time far memory problem though literally forgot finish first three time rather funny hindsight fourth time failed due pocket knife dull thinking trying could drown jump roof could drink something poisonous could grab kitchen knife stab chest could steal father gun shoot ampnbsp tell family last time said anything got tired like dont tell thing anymore dont want hear response even family tired bullshit wow ampnbsp justi dont know anymorei apologise bothering | self.SuicideWatch |
475 | struggling miscarriage early miscarriage last month ive sad last couple week totally normal first cycle trying period due week ive super anxious depressed tht point barely function past two day ive compulsively taking pregnancy test cant lose thought im trying distract working anyone feel like obsessive thought making much harder people see therapist tomorrow trying make today | self.bipolar |
476 | writing guy hospital f last night tightened belt around neck tied rack closet leaned back lightheaded saw double wrote suicide note big brother im completely fine gesture real attempt even though doctor using interchangeably told parent right scared bad feel bad much plate right term work general life stress could said want see therapist often instead think killing death every day im burden parent didnt sign mess hospital boring there guard always watching outside room mom sitting next time wont let sight even made sleep parent bed last night got blood drawn passed first time want go home badly fault im im waiting therapist whoever come dont know since come see people er patient hurt feel like ive ruined life ive sex people double digit manipulated lied lot age look much older really hate people let crawl inside body gave away whoever would self respect couldnt even comprehend consequence every drug could get hand humongous slut happened came sens month ago ive trying change much feel like nobody ever want disgusting slut like someday everybody find ive done past abandon happened guy liked found sex two ugly horrible friend dropped sent even awful dark place wish innocent pure happy wish wasnt reckless fuck dont want tell parent ive done mom know im virgin doesnt know extent got tested awhile ago absolute miracle im clear std feel guilty even kissing somebody secret carry around every day everybody disgusted hate brother know lot called massive slut true worst part feel like there way except die already ruined life ever wanted successful public eye used acting stuff somehow everybody would find somebody lied past age sex would find oldest ive ever majority people older dont deserve live constant guilt shame ive done would much easier chemical imbalance head something im responsible know everybody make mistake pay consequence | self.SuicideWatch |
478 | doesnt trust help anxiety girlfriend late together year gad attack roughly month trend seems something would bother whether home school family friend etc would internalize let build inside thing boil would get triggered next bad thing happened early relationship guilty triggering anxiety couple time would get upset something said get upset upset something resulting argument would devolve attack ive learned gad general ive felt like become better understanding avoid triggering ive done good job feel like take even harmless thing turn reason fight hold grudge thing ive apologized doesnt seem see change ive made better find apologizing smallest misstep doesnt apologize adamant doesnt want see therapist take medication anxiety current way dealing trying get occasionally talking best friend even dependent whether hang within day attack dont already plan doesnt reach talk dont want push toward anything know decision make get defensive anytime subject anxiety even brought saying handle lately whenever get triggered lash telling get away word mean nothing try talk say respecting ive giving space freeze day two wait initiate contact seldom talk triggered work thing together say tired talking thing doesnt help since attack keep coming back know prerogative whether want help try respect wish fear though see problem fear maybe problem much support staying positive encouraging sending reassuring message every day reminding care researching supportive partner someone gad talking therapist help process everything going tried educate care feel like best job situation arise doesnt feel like trust maybe even blame attack time okay attack asks reassurance wont give promised wont however feel pretty helpless point especially since always push away care much know healthy either u unsustainable want stop pattern relationship becomes irreparably damaged already dont know much fault much anxiety want help want happy healthy know make happy feeling might better without life way still good partner relationship lost cause tldr girlfriend push away anxiety attack doesnt trust help deal help please | self.Anxiety |
479 | hard focus work school public deleted | self.SuicideWatch |
481 | sitting car wondering know huge part im paxil cant get refill see doctor next week ive wondering point med even ran cant afford december rent landlady breathing neck november im failing class still havent found way deal chronic stomach pain cant even afford take care pet right ive let husband step kid animal know go er tell want nothing die right cant stop cry ive already missed ton work havent even finished first day go ill probably lose job already broke feed train track block away want lie never wake | self.SuicideWatch |
482 | key problem hey would like give tool end suffering post whats reason suffering well thought prove try think winning million dollar feel positive emotion imagine family member dying feeling depressed try got nothing lose everything gain soo thought cause type suffering disbelieving thought make feel happy content fulfilled dont believe try imagine first got something really wanted maybe car girlfriend job moment werent suffering lost thought caused suffering soo left happiness got better job might lost thought like job bad job humilliates etc also see get happiness absence thought arent thinking aka distracted interested check noah elkrief youtube learned lel | self.depression |
483 | talking class part discussion grade shaking whole time british literature class people grade respond discussion question professor asks front everyone microphone asked question knew answer missed point last unit speaking wanted get point time soon handed microphone started shaking uncontrollably heart rate jumped roof even fear public speaking issue saying thing front people come giving opinion people staring im terrified accepted socially dont want say something everyone like well guy stupid idk even count anxiety fact thought something could make shake heart rate increase fast scare | self.Anxiety |
484 | dont know im going handle feeling next year deleted | self.depression |
485 | tell parent im feeling depersonalized | self.Anxiety |
487 | think im becoming delusional nothing make sense everything seems fucked hard look past fact life meaning even try distract reality hit hard hate world work hate society forcing u change fit supposed chase money life gain materialistic happiness hate cant change become productive work hard top benefit dont control anything thats happening even freedom limited go much discomfort struggle get one short moment happiness forced fake positivity even thing arent going well worst part cant anything youre forced put get caught chasing thing need validated everyone around u get distracted get used feel satisfied way thing dont understand people ok dont understand people dont think chose feel overwhelmed reality id rather die go im unfit live society dont money im dumb im flawed many imperfection im optimistic dont work hard dont motivation there many thing thats wrong keep going im tired facade acting like everything going great even couldnt say everything feel bcz dont know put word life suck get thats world work deal distract thought put happy face live denial maybe im overthinking everything cant help feel like im state clarity im episode weird way dont wan na cured made far thanks reading sorry place im really confused dont know ive tried many time cant control thought | self.depression |
488 | dont want rest life tb way deleted | self.bipolar |
489 | helping girlfriend depression hi reddit really needed help girlfriend long distance relationship year throughout time told way really benefit told reason loved worthless cared etc problem completly awful word matter instead supporting overthink everything take thing personally dont know say half time reason try hard reach say something supportive nothing come nothing work panic say pointless thing make impact stuck feeling bad feel awful fail support way need something try constantly remind vocally tell positive thing think slip forget mention constantly forget call first text first first time loner life coming talkitive supportive way physical affection hard reason doesnt always like physical comforting friend able much open able tell feel able sometimes talk support help feel better feel like know everytime doesnt tell something take personally know doesnt mean tell purporse im providing example point considering therapy anything help supportive way need im sure change going therapy next month know regardless know change relationship sake tipssuggestions thing improve love much want better boyfriend also sorry wrong reddit post far know dont think depression thank reading | self.depression |
490 | help cousin sound suicidal give tip shes lost job couple week ago year anyway fired without given reason found drunk doesnt drink shes rambling like crazy shes incredibly depressed im sure might tip help | self.SuicideWatch |
491 | possible feel like shit happy time deleted | self.depression |
494 | never knew type pain physically possible deleted | self.SuicideWatch |
495 | fairy tale wrote cry land far far away lived little princess little hope dream could big lived mediocre life witch came asked question majesty see heartache polite smile really want little princess slightly amused gave serious answer joking way want something look forward poof little princess trouble went window saw many wondrous thing future made okay distorted reality life something special wrapped flesh blood something one could take away even witch smiled walked away little princess broke tear market free | self.depression |
496 | crazy put insane amount work somewhat acceptable deleted | self.depression |
497 | fuck im day drunk miserable feelin pill fuck shit | self.depression |
498 | realization setting canada day went party turning time march broken two half year relationship ended messy lot harassment ex happened time discovered year old sister cutting peer pressure internet friend thats another story canada day neighbour party two year older age ex since small collection community went high school started night hard ounce bottle alcohol lot someone barely drank followed three black fly cooler incredibly intoxicated still fun night got cold ex new girlfriend friend time said oh hold ill get call leo leo sweater wont mind anyways get sweater im grand time around called night knew drunk good one home house going alone recollection walk home saying goodbye anyone even though apparently given lot hug kiss cheek friend remember anything shortly got sweater harder try piece puzzle together fuzzy becomes happened according best friend went home crawled bed cover also decided come check make sure okay friend another mutual guy friend come cause path dark came see taking long told expected getting glass water something found head leg short unbuttoned mine thrown floor messaged day later ask talked going tell girlfriend dumbfounded didnt clue talking got nervous thinking maybe kissed went home people saw explained happened still didnt understand started cry confused recollection explained ever happening started say raped begged say anything didnt know played part promised tell hasnt since day messaged leo later day asked went back friend threatened keeping mouth shut made think fault screenshot message saying fault one know admitted something whenever id ask happened wouldnt say light campaign started understand different scenario sexual assault never consented dont remember happened dont remember going home night intoxicated sober sexually assaulted mind playing trick never affected way recently brought current boyfriend freaked mad didnt understand anger cant tell im allowed angry something dont remember feel violated doesnt hurt way others im still able sex masturbate unlike go sexual abuse feel weird void inside like something awaken swallowed whole ive gotten new low im tempted mix prescription parent medicine cupboard stash already im trying find right time allowed feel way actually assaulted playing victim card | self.SuicideWatch |
499 | find motivation seek help feel like want wallow self pity waiting decide want die convince go get help dont want help | self.SuicideWatch |
500 | depression life recently occurred ive probably depressed ever since small child im think dont know life feel like without depression course ups down year therapy diagnosis mostly everything depression largely seems measured comparison felt well slept whether cry dark thought well there always bad possibility childhood depression going whole life seems left equation therapy seems put focus getting health back way depressive episode anybody else feel way | self.depression |
501 | depression grabbed throat wont let go slowly choking death | self.depression |
502 | thing even worse havent left bed day bed doesnt even sheet cant get energy put time try move start sob curl ball dont want live want bash head wall thigh bruised dragging nail across feel like im going kill week havent really talked anyone past month hope nobody sad go dont want pain anymore know people say much ahead really dont f im suicidal move dad told im lazy dont want anything feel like true think deserve die time feel like dont deserve kill im awful deserve peace rest well life energy nothing going sleep woke soon got drank shit ton nyquil took melatonin slept till pm started cry soon woke really cant handle anymore fgfrth therapist didnt even see week think sign girlfriend also isolating think fault im negative cant alive | self.bipolar |
503 | relationship anxiety hate valentine make feel wanted fall asleep next someone cared dont want get relationship im really really sensitive scare give someone ability effect emotionally yet really want feel happy crave love happiness like ppl crave money success want life relationship want make someone happy love want feel special matter exist someone life much would sad left anxiety make feel unlovable im alot knowing worst enemy upsetting tell talk thru anxiety ppl dont understand anxious thought feel alone life time live head easier anxiety attack alone v front someone care seeing eye pitiful dont know date know survive | self.Anxiety |
504 | loneliness lack selfworth feel like constantly head deleted | self.depression |
505 | normal unable connect anyone experiencing loss nobody life right life seems meaningless think committing suicide good idea want give year first really really cant take anymore go ive seen lot horrible stuff life dont doubt become sociopath criminal road maybe better kill sooner rather later raised mom brother lot trouble law criminal witnessed assaulted four time little kid would shouting match phone people every night mom finally kicked never saw mom died cancer last july shed fighting lung cancer since born terrible relationship still good moment never come back fate would friend also died cancer last year live friend mom currently kind heart give food place live barely say word one another im used forgotten promise broken whim respect people want get back usually dont im seen cold guy mean face people school think im going go rampage steer clear dont want hurt anyone dont love anyone either saw stranger dying would likely either ignore say suck would try comfort last moment know im terrible person feeling way know treatment would also get situation dont want sociopath narcissist feel world give choice time start care someone pas away turn | self.depression |
506 | dating know saying go recovery start plant pet person im month iop program month last bout inpatient stay day total still see therapist weekly still dealing nasty abandonment issue general mistrust people get paranoid sometimes people get ulterior motif ive questioning sexuality late within last couple week realizing may like female male im female dont know might like equally tbh tried dating apps female found one girl really connected talked everyday week even met real life ghosted yesterday im realizing dating female isnt easier dating male im pretty upset really liked feel abandoned hurt also disclose ive never serious relationship im almost never much went date person pay last year got frustrated still virgin gave first guy wanted tinder im starting regret late im afraid love something wasnt meant im afraid im supposed love one supposed love im also afraid missing youth exploring intimacy people im probably never going prettier also lost pound still working im close looking best still try date keep going dating apps continue work issue put dating hold advice would greatly appreciated | self.Anxiety |
507 | going sound chessybut get depression got ta learn use brain instead impulsive got ta try use brain got ta focus task hand got ta stop overthinking going happen focus get whatever life throw | self.depression |
508 | spouse making worse husband refuse even try understand anxiety make feel physically ill panic attack real symptom insists faking scream make worse become anxious around trying anxious horrible currently threatening affair teasing already cant win want med med want therapy weekly becomes livid pay copay cant win im frustrated know wasnt le anxious worried time thing would better doesnt ease parent heard wont comr around around feel alone isolated | self.Anxiety |
509 | previously diagnosed mdd suspect misdiagnosis shift bipolar broke uninsured united state potential tw greeting lurking month ive struggled major depression life diagnosed teen believed relatively stable time however resurgence depressed symptom along host disturbing symptom intrusive suicidal thought self harm relapse eating disorder relapse substance abuse etc suspect related first notable manic mixed episode concerned may misdiagnosed disorder evolved bp desperate need evaluationtreatment however uninsured way affording health insurance allots sort mental health prescription benefit received quote multiple psychiatrist stating evaluation cost subsequent monthly followup run upwards top cost med might prescribe ill paying stay sane pay feed shelter family anyone experience situation would situation advice resource linksanything would helpful thanks reading thanks community good help info ive already gotten lurking | self.bipolar |
510 | one day look history ive talking far long one day one day till leave place one day poison infect people care one day pain feel gone one day | self.SuicideWatch |
511 | want die dont courage commit suicide motivation live dont see getting anywhere life dont skill talent accomplishment real hobby hate im stupid selfish socially incompetent incapable performing even basic task hate complete burden everybody friend dont seem care family doesnt understand depression hell dont even know understand either hard articulate best put half time feel like im lying using depression excuse like parent always told shouldnt even depressed considering easy life compared others much hate say agree much really want fix everything feel like want kill cant dont know cant matter badly want cant bring maybe ill learn accept living like | self.depression |
514 | possible missed dose lamotrigine withdrawal symptom felt one missed dose lamotrigine plus prescription missed dose experienced withdrawal symptom longer term effect fine next day picked | self.bipolar |
515 | trying first meltdown year didnt know else post deleted | self.bipolar |
516 | family underestimate depression say following depressed teen frustrates one take feeling seriously dont want talk anyone isolate deep want normal failed sat way situation feel guilty mood sadness affect family cant help able control make worse cant make connection anyone everyone age traveling relationship sad cry sleep night feel hopeless stupid im living best life im wasting away bed | self.depression |
518 | deal depression around family im going vacation soon staying family wondering guy hide depression constant contact family | self.depression |
520 | worst night ever decided go last night sonora hour live friend telling come go bar hopping told could crash place long story short ended getting ditched friend alone night hour away home nowhere stay friend ditched probably another girl alone back bar scared eventually started panicking cry happening kept getting hit older men felt sick stomach felt stupid foolish even going thought friend knowing clearly friend anyways ended motel paid room cried night ive never felt stupid left behind wanted go home didnt want risk getting duo way walked nearest motel honestly hate people ive never felt low life blocked facebook messaging everything deserve disgusting drunk night im tired treated like nothing think handled thing pretty well facing still scared creep around left right even one drunk guy randomly got car like nothing sitting car contemplating try go home stay motel randomly got passenger seat screamed get could hurt could really hurt one guy actually tried help get safe somewhere fact guy left stranded drunken bar ok would think would least let sleep floor something nooo safety isnt important fucking bullshit need new better friend support want best ughhh im still mad happened im glad didnt drive home drunk wouldnt gotten far god really shielding last night im glad got home eventually | self.depression |
521 | haiku real life experience real life situation happened day ago school therapist waiting room gave writing long time ago selfdiagnosed dysphoria made feel like wasnt worth year gotten low life im starting write constructive outletand feel good know shit many think well hope least one person resonate make someone feel like arent misunderstood alone untitled checking yes form asking want die choose yet still feel sorry maam please take seat sir sit stuffy room feeling even worse | self.depression |
522 | question inner critic tell arent good enough stupidfat anything else say thought arent always right believe arent good enough doesnt mean | self.depression |
523 | solo traveling different country im amsterdam hostel away home reason thought would good idea force meet people packed dorm meaningful conversation anyone meanwhile dorm bed empty girl keep shacking guy theyve known le day think people meant die alone | self.depression |
524 | need someone talk thinking thing future girl ugh complicated anyone ear get opinion thanks | self.depression |
525 | quit drinking started med day first diagnosed gad put med worked well four almost four year came depression anxiety med around moved half way across country home surprisingly fine first year even come medication ive learned lot coping method year therapy worked wonderfully year ago nearly two year without med started noticing use coping method past year told would overcome go back med unfortunately thing slowly got worse four month ago flew san francisco sister house rest family flew well week long family vacation vacation put edge thing pretty bad still fun however lot fun came drinking something family well drank every night one week period flew back home continued drink guess learned helped stave ill emotion didnt get rid since two week ago binge drinking lot ever since vacation month ago along excess drinking also got bad anxiety quite panic attack new year around corner decided stop wasnt going wait january first start stopped excessive drinking difficult first tend self control issue stopped completely im even bartender sit front half day made especially difficult quit come first new insurance kick immediatly schedule appointment primary care see doctor appointment hour ago told doctor everything told guy thought going refer psychiatrist gave med spot day one med ive got good feeling guess im im proud allowing mental illness take frankly dont anyone else tell edit tldr anxiety come back self medicated alcohol recently quit drinking started med looking forward result | self.Anxiety |
526 | whats point fucking point going die one day anyway point continuing live everyday struggle fuck reason im alive becauss dad still alive died id gone either way matter dont even know exist everything could figment imagination fuck u existence existing right even sadness feel bad fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck | self.depression |
527 | dae experience work place anxiety dont know thats even thing find im completely different person work get knot stomach walk thru door get nervous talking anyone higher like sometimes cant even get word speaking someone bc anxious sometimes ill say stuff thats character im like wtf say make sense leave work day find sitting silence ride home thinking everything happened work day everything said etc like continuous loop wondering boss think also anxious feeling work feel like hurt performance sometimes memory clouded trouble remembering thing im wound day stress much worrying perception work sorry long post pretty new reddit first post also want mention diagnosed occ amp gad take med dont seem really work thanks help guy | self.Anxiety |
528 | quit job need urgent advice deleted | self.depression |
530 | meme sub get day thank creative people | self.bipolar |
531 | feel like live fragile dependent deleted | self.SuicideWatch |
532 | im new im new subreddit im grateful im got diagnosed manic depression type october previously missed diagnosed depression general anxiety ive medication since currently working ive take break try something new im currently coming depression part cycle usually hypomania come next im stressed hard fucked whatever happened week depression struggle lot trying cope self harm use cut almost two year high school main reason got medication begin throughout year ive gone binder younger mdma amp alcohol became older alcohol stopped fact pregnant kid reason havent slipped back drug alcohol im currently outpatient treatment guess would call go see two doctor talk sort feeling try find program fitting hardest fight life thought son creeped right back revenge ive basically missed half life dont remember depressed anxiety im place life dont even know everyday waking feel like dont path anymore ive lost focus career right im trying pull back cant im mentally exhausted feel useless fight hard everyday keep alive calm two kid alone choose put constantly wish didnt wish could given better start better life currently job interview wednesday valentine day first job ive gone since october tried kill left job one orientation trigger basically hold back saying thing thing crazy woman found lied cancer hold hope job hope change routine something healthy actually enjoy going work miss life miss able enjoy life miss | self.bipolar |
533 | ill never like sorry im using venting ground share thought people look admire strong personable friendly cant ever even try ever hear youre shy never talk kill wish could funny friendly wish could stand friend crack joke without self deprecating making everyone else uncomfortable im visibly different people scare away dream going friend spending day home never happen im incapable close people dont even know fix thanks listening dont worry im still holding thing get better | self.depression |
534 | depressive help unsubbed page ago good obviously depressing found back today prechristmas dread set looking daily thread there intense desire help pulling acknowledgement id probably make thing worse three thousand lost people one thread alone startling tragic looking people profile describe suicidal thought checking long ago last post wondering theyre still alive thered anything could say keep going anything say keep going help risk amplifying feeling found strange dilemma recently reached someone going difficult time work hoping could empathise offer comfort realised talked im still position offer counsel respect still deep hole since dont tend get involved community im afraid harm good arrogant think could help anyone either side fence found talking fellow sufferer helped youve able help someone experience logically youd think three thousand lonely people immediate obvious solution still hesitate thought suggesting establishing proper gettogether scenario | self.depression |
535 | need vent first time usually let fester im trying self harm anymore boyfriend major fight today relationship ending one took back guilty feeling anxiety remaining fight made realize truly despicable dad died st death anniversary week went bender different state completely alone didnt drink drug reason related death didnt know never sex never properly dated boy shy nervous went boy flirting bender wild dumb shit groupied band tried get sugar daddy etc didnt even sleep guy never compromised thing felt core morality scared even bender properly probably slept maybe guy thats thought least realize truly disgusting slovenly whore guy went date boyfriend texted asking set friend next day boyfriend saw text phone relationship went meltdown everything boyfriend said correct absolutely deserve mom knew left dad knew died bf know matter long hard try hide im someone leave im reprehensible totally worthless ugly account walk inside im completely alone always im unlovable feel totally alone recognize even posting asking people help feel way selfish feel bad hurting better base feel like im ruining dad memory feel like option always thought love relationship could get life get living there one empty people supposed love cant love clear im problem im common thread im like shitty roommate live inside body dont want anymore dont think ill actually im scared hurting life hurt much also | self.SuicideWatch |
536 | anyone feel like youre keep thinking im faking everything move happy like im forcing happy cant understand dont know im self harming dont know feel whether happy sad neutral anything like intentionally make never get bed feel like yet cant dont know please help edit like sort masochist want everything make feel horrible edit also dont wake go feeling like im faking drive crazy also dont see whats wrong self harming | self.depression |
537 | cat sensing panic attack as recently panic attack due pretty unfortunate event cat sealpoint siamese started knawing hand know ragged breathing probably annoyed seemed slightly concerned got sat face tried gnaw cheek ive taught he allowed nip bite want attention seemed different started settle went back curled behind leg laid something cat attention seeker | self.Anxiety |
538 | conflicted happiness start making plan kill get huge wave relief everything fine attempt fail get stuck feeling negative time pure bliss anyone else feel conflicred emotion also still worry mental impact would ex amp friend love feeling short lived emotion sorry ramble | self.depression |
539 | coping daytoday cope necessarily treat bad depression daytoday basis daily mantra eating drug whatever tell matter never feel better whether genetics experience stay get mentally tougher help filter real issue otherwise non existent rhetoric head share | self.depression |
540 | im lost want againi full angersadnesshatecant escapei lost trace hope inside mei cant take anymorei hate everyone happynessi want feel painwhat fuck deserve destoyed livesi feel losttiredemptyalonehow survive | self.depression |
542 | hangover make worse feel like youre going motion like there point anything anymore wonder even bothered wake morning endure pain movement get uncontrollable mind race | self.depression |
544 | running time diagnosed bipolar lived constant bullying humiliation emotional neglect family peer child started cb therapy lithium year ago staying five night psych ward gotten easier disease overpowering distress tolerance technique higher dos lithium following healthy lifestyle foundation character nested trauma familiar unconsciously seek understand perfectly well people disease choose take life hell also know within next year disease claim life painfully rapidcycling mania depression essentially hijacking executive control mind body recurrent episode continue push little bit closer knife edge speak want live like living pain whole life last thing want die painfully hand disease allow long road humane peaceful death remain culturally obfuscated disease dirty work hurt others way civilized dialogue experience thus far shown people recoil thought voluntary euthanasia marginally invested wellbeing mental illness im trying take stand left life go peacefully seems clear community perfectly okay living pain every day | self.bipolar |
546 | dont know feel like im going die soon know common thing think health anxiety cant seem get feeling away really feel time soon im ready im scared dont know anyone else gone time felt sure going die didnt know looking reassurance isnt going save need comfort right | self.Anxiety |
547 | driving dog maine thanksgiving dinner uncle told u friend college andy andy relatively successful salesman boston area couple decade graduated college house car stuff wanted wanted find something bigger know spiritual vague existential longing needed andy sold everything went k debt left went louisiana new orleans lived house made wood old barge came mississippi meet geographic demise running water electricity heat got dog sold fish taco made fish hed catch content living land best friend dog river dog grew old andy wanted help old age gotten maine drove back home die part story serf punchline crazy vagrant selling food shack brings dog maine dying wish ridiculous andy right money isnt question everyone asks head andy doesnt look life wonder theyre really worthwhile make andys life much worthwhile worthwhile life cliche version thing always involve growing beard living wood know worthwhile life world filled people living life think worthwhile arent vice versa bet christopher mccandless would tell worthwhile end eating poison berry accident cobain would say never worthwhile youll accomplish everything still nothing feel okay except driving shitty old volvo girlfriend told take break work mental issue love tried say break would hurt going introduce parent tomorrow think still shes say need time trust worthwhile life worthwhile life without havent found life worthwhile yet ive searching year thankful think search bit longer wish knew andy found driving dog maine go kick bucket dream help happy living life simple dont know ill find dont know andy found think somewhere right think might bottom pill bottle last week almost stopped searching week wish knew searching edit spend time writing still get fucked glitch | self.depression |
548 | order hated house pretend someone im deleted | self.depression |
549 | weird habit anyone else ever make food throw away reason thought gotten past still hungry throwing dinner suddenly felt upset | self.bipolar |
550 | pill one side suicide note sitting trying figure another way cope w everything cant anything help please im desperate need relief deleted | self.SuicideWatch |
551 | want kill dont want hurt mother want kill dont want hurt mother father never cared dont worry know mother would devastated dont know could get still want kill | self.SuicideWatch |
552 | guess spent amazon reason deleted | self.bipolar |
554 | every part life fallen piece deleted | self.depression |
555 | back started last christmas eve much bear told husband leave decided day going last couldnt take anymore surrounded family already dead inside unable feel connection future purpose hospitalized next day first inpatient hospitalization course next year including one stay icu foiled attempt tried everything ect treatment work need least weekly maintenance basis impossible sustain work maintain sort respectable cognitive functioning put clozapine nobody know anymore husband left recent hospitalization later filed divorce nobody nothing yr old living back home parent trigger cptsd mother also ill never medicated toxic environment angry divorce sat tried comfort tell everything okay work best instead embarrassed people think every time pas funeral home wonder put deposit would meet parent standard cant find mean comfortable going die anyway expedite inevitable everyones story end way nobody reading mine anyway | self.SuicideWatch |
556 | feel bad every time say something remotely nice someone always stupidest shit im trying talk mom little sister keep butting said stop talking im one feel bad honestly fucking sick saying shit feeling bad right | self.Anxiety |
557 | feel like cant really talk anyone depression deleted | self.depression |
558 | everything beautiful dont want want lay starve | self.SuicideWatch |
559 | loss appetite hi ive losing appetite lately getting anxious throughout day longer insurance january im losing weight steadily happened anyone anyone suggestion help solve | self.Anxiety |
561 | cant eat talk anymore havent able eat good ever since got depressed start summer came year mom everyone keep worrying keep suggesting thing eat stomach linked feel feel eat keep venting reddit swear reddit making depressed people reddit keep telling thing like honestly post tumblr youre manchild grow seriously literally sit around day whine drink harass people dont want anything anymore disgusting well admit like month ago bother someone stopped completely cuz realized end bother people care dont mean bother anyone im sorry someone else told time wake abu need major shift personality youre year old act write like angsty teenager youre obsessed hamster hamtaro game youve working year sorry tell game suck ball thats nobody playing give let go want work hamster game im making hamster rival hangout everyone kept telling posting wrong subreddits decided instead posting asperger syndrome subreddit anxiety subreddit rant subreddit vent subreddits like usually posted gaming subreddit instead happened httpsiimgurcomjvsixjpng people called troll someone else replied saying stop harassing everyone didnt mean harass troll anyone deleted thread dont want bother guess silly expect people give good response instead calling troll shouldve said oh please upload video weeabootique spent whole night recording video weeabootique one know recording video ended big though asked technical help nvidia subreddit thread downvoted though im really depressed feel bad something want talk someone private also anything usually talk | self.depression |
562 | emotion feel feel like much little feel like never enough worth mentioning anyone cant describe anything different chestpainitchinessmigraines sppear sometimes ruined whole life f | self.Anxiety |
563 | actually happened contemplating suicide deleted | self.SuicideWatch |
564 | feeling overwhelmed hey guy im kind end rope think need someone talk since arent many people fit bill ill post im far along want life finished two year degree general study working year couldnt decide wanted working parttime living rundown rental home two room mate barely making enough pay share bill top car longer run ask story car different really shitty story fiancee expressed unhappiness living arrangement room mate come may arent renewing lease however im sure well able afford moving stated barely make enough cover bill meaning hard save money security pet deposit new place wed also move walking distance job id need new car really dont know ive got ish month save dollar cheapest apartment around month security deposit normally price rent deposit one month rent roughly new car im scraping every two week saving basically praying kind christmas bonus work decent tax return feel like failure feel like failing partner fiancee feel like failing member society ive thought killing never would recently fantasize getting bus leaving everything behind friend pet partner job start living paycheck paycheck somewhere one know waste life away sometimes urge get really strong thats thanks reading | self.depression |
565 | second meet school psychologist hi title said second meetappointment first time life feel like im moving forward life month ago discovered anxiety controlled life life likely issue made realise pretty tough since word couldnt improve im happy finally start taking control begin living soon wanted say appreciate people subreddit helping discover im alone fight hope soon well | self.Anxiety |
566 | dont understand people bring give shit thing removed | self.depression |
568 | thing wanted get chest also posted rsuicidewatch want see anyone else feel similar way always know ill end even good day know really projection hollow false happiness created sertraline even good day know doubt ill last much longer nasty selfish prick doesnt even deserve flase joy drugged brain creates never able work cant anything requires precise use hand motion based general im dyspraxic cant much thats people based always weird one im autistic becoming le le tolerated everywhere im fat ugly generally horrible person dont know surprised realised left jeez hurt lot ive stopped taking sertraline past week saving secret order take massive overdose point future know overdose death slow painful dont really want certainly deserve parasite still live mum age supporting family instead continue leech sibling emotionally manipulating order parasitise kindness im also full problematic radical left wing opinion usually kind grandparent knew theyd probably disown even though absolutely deserve hatred still dont tell im weak point probably try distance family friend order minimise emotional damage cause cant bring make hate willpower piss poor dont quite know im posting maybe another way selfishly make feel better getting shit chest absolutely problem matter there many people posting one another drop darkness negativity shadow sub commit suicide survive episode there always gon na another episode overcome depression gon na come back worse since six year old hopeless case want tell people give im worth effort let rot dark corner finally grow ball kill sorry | self.depression |
569 | bad social anxiety especially bfs friend please help rhe title suggests crippling social anxiety im soxial person st place either open uo person immedeately never always two extreme thw spectrum there bo grey area unfortunately kost bfs friend side cant open wholly completely might seem rude make anxiety worse every time plan something freinds obviosuly make effort go get extremely extremely nervous hand heart start beating faster l palm start sweating feel nauseous usual symptom associated bday tonight go making nervous work frenzy know wont understand completely he extrovert talk anyone anytime anywhere like said either open compeltely cant couple friend talk nowmally ie conversation flow cant ive tried explaingi people cant luckily able open office collegues weve become friend im afraid difference cause fight later past ive tried get feel like emotion cant get rid completely ever hope understands atleast doesnt feel like im rude anyone feel tgis way please please please help tldr crippling social axiety make nervous whenever im around people espesially bfs friend | self.Anxiety |
570 | waiting till holiday left job september downwards spiral ever since gave job gave life used saving close maxing credit card im tired convincing everyday im worthless like every single day realize im worthless tell im worthless people care like there constant tug war battle head rational irrational feeling acknowledge suicide irrational choice caused irrational feeling doesnt matter im tired suffering becuase feeling irrational doesnt mean arent true im especially tired suffering many people life lot worse yet somehow pull feel weak ugly inhuman anywayi wanted get feeling dont know ill really kill holiday feel like thing stopping today thought would really selfish right christmas dont want anymore buzzkill already | self.depression |
571 | coping depression false laughter anyone try combat depression laughter joke dealing people ive known friend jokester guy make people laugh none know im trying hard feel depressed ill try make joke lot stuff sarcasm friend make feel good little eventually happy feeling laughter return feeling like crap | self.depression |
572 | antidepressant kick day celexa mg kick still depressed insomnia acid reflux stress tired side effect thanks | self.depression |
573 | think dying everyday im dont know im like ive never told anyone im depressed constant suicidal thought think people know im happiest people im pretty awkward quiet around people mom always say im negative person im tired wish never born dont even know kill im scared height gun illegal country dont want overdose pill dont want die room parent find body ever never check ive told mom overdosed hung wouldnt know smell everyday imagine pointing revolver head pulling trigger specifically revolver ive never even seen one real life slow steady thought wanting kill recently suddenly like burst anger wanting kill point use hand pretend shooting make urge go away killed anger sadness youre young hear word depressed depression think mean deep sadness feel numb cant feel anything havent felt happy long feel like die yeah maybe itd sad awkward parent dont think im use anyways also contempt child dont enough money dont even love sibling sibling child much happier travelling world time im poorest person know among friend family pathetic want buy bicycle make feel good whenever get ride rented one cant afford cant afford many thing keep wanting something badly start hate hate everything least die people mourn death age imagine still feeling way dying nobody | self.depression |
574 | living instead existing hardest thing ive ever done deleted | self.depression |