Opinion ID: 1964721
Heading Depth: 1
Heading Rank: 2

Heading: recio's e-mails

Text: The first message at issue, sent by Recio to Evers on April 16, 2001, mostly discussed the work of a particular Catalan poet who was apparently of academic interest to them. Recio also discussed her summer travel plans, however, and promised to send postcards from each of her stops. Recio wrote, I'll write you from everywhere and you don't have to answer my postcards, of course, what I would like though would be to receive a letter from you sometime, short, but at least send me one. Recio also wrote that she would help Evers prepare articles for publication. I would like you to publish, if you want, of course, I don't want to stick myself in your life ... but I do want to be your friend, do you understand? I hope so, because if you don't understand, you will end up hating me and I will have an attack. If I don't see you in August as we were saying this morning ... UFFF!... I think I would shoot myself in the head (think that I'm bad off in the head if you want, I don't care, but I will shoot myself). (Emphasis in original.) Recio claims that I don't want to stick myself in your life is a literal translation, but that the verb would have been better translated as `to meddle, intrude, interfere.' A message sent the following day was still discussing the same poet, but was more personal. Recio wrote: The truth is, I really feel like talking to you and I don't know if I'll have time and if I'll be able to tell you all that I want.... The most important thing is to communicate and I am happy with your e-mails in any case. Of course, I haven't erased your voice from my answering machine. It makes me happy and I love it. I'll leave it there a few days. I just feel like it. I'm trying hard not to call you ... but I won't do it because I don't want to take advantage of you. I was thrilled to talk to you yesterday. You already know that I don't have to tell you what I feel because you know quite well and also I am always repeating to you like a parrot. Recio contends that Of course should have been translated `[B]y the way' and that It makes me happy and I love it should have been translated `I find it funny and I like it.' Recio claims that I was thrilled to talk to you would have been more accurately translated as I enjoyed talking to you or I loved to talk to you. Recio also contends that You already know that I don't have to tell you what I feel actually contained a reference to the previous sentence, so the idea was `[Y]ou already know that I loved to talk with you.' Recio's message went on to say that she had told her husband she wanted to take Evers to a particular restaurant in Spain and that [h]e doesn't mind, he says it's fine. Recio wrote, Let's see if we can go someday (you can bring whomever you want, but I want to bring you). Recio also commented more on a particular poet and wrote, I love that you're reading him and that you stay up late reading it. How great, I figured out what you like! Could you keep telling me what you like to read? I want to share with you. Recio again asked Evers to write her, and promised, I'll send you all the e-mails that I can. You'll get tired of it, I won't. For me, you are very important. Recio concluded, Hey, I miss you (I won't ever tell you that again, I promise). Write me when you can, okay? Don't forget. I hope the summer goes by fast (to be able to see you once and for all!). Another, shorter message was sent later the same day. Recio, who is a Cuban exile, asked Evers if she was Pro-Castro. Recio asked: Do you believe all that propaganda? It would hurt me but I would still have the same caring feelings for you. The truth is, I already care so much for you that I don't know what I would say. It would be terribly hard to discuss with you. I'll tell you seriously, you are in charge. I am at your feet, I am not a man ... (that last part is a joke)[.] Recio concluded by promising to write later, and she did so that evening. Recio wrote: I just called you and it surprised me that you had already read the message I sent you. But I liked that you told me that you aren't Pro-Castro, it wouldn't have mattered, but I feel much better, I confess. To tell you the truth, it would have been painful for me but I wouldn't have discussed it with you. Of course I discuss it but with you it wouldn't have made a difference. Okay, but the thing is, it was funny the way you proclaimed it. You know what I am discovering? I think that you like to laugh, you like good humor, you have a spark when you talk etc. but behind it all there is an intelligent and sensitive woman, very intelligent and sensitive and I want to discover more. Has it ever occurred to you that it is hard to meet a guy not because you are pushy, like you say, but rather for your intelligence and sensitivity? I don't know, I think that could be it. Recio says that you have a spark actually means '[you are] witty and sharp.' Recio's message continues: What I am missing is the directions. Look: I write you and later, if you would like, you write me, those things that they call traditional letters. What do you think? I only ask that if I write you four, you write me one, nothing more. It's that in Barcelona I'll see my e-mail two or three times a week, but in Sitges maybe once, and that's even going to be hard because I'm going to miss you (I'm not going to keep saying it, honestly). You don't understand because you see me like some nice person who tortures you with e-mails and who you will work with, you are kind, polite, etc but for me it is different, Michelle, I feel so much for you, don't you notice? Don't you see that I talk to you not just to pass the time, but rather because it makes me happy? That's how it is, and of course, I will miss you and the other type of mail will help me to be near you even if you don't answer me. It's something caring, affectionate that doesn't have to do with anything else. What's more, when you say things like what you said about [a particular writer], I find it interesting to talk to you. I'm going to save your message. I have to read it better. Okay, so that you have to wait a little I'll send the addresses from there, that way, you don't have to worry about saving them or anything. Let's see if some day you have half of the affection that I feel for you. Let's see. I doubt it but oh well. Today people are just plain savage (that's a joke)[.] Recio says that the translated words I feel so much for you are too strong and should have been translated as `I have developed some affection for you' and that the phrase it makes me happy actually meant `I feel comfortable.' Recio continued the message by writing: In reference to Spain I love what you say: it's true, we'll coincide there sometime and it will be great. Sometimes I'm afraid that if you would come you would be disappointed. We'll do everything possible for that not to happen. But it's true: there is a lot of life to live and good times to be had and above all: introduce you to Juan who will just faint when he sees you[.] Recio asked Evers to [t]ell me what books you want me to bring you and tell me what I can do to not miss you so much. Recio concluded by describing how she had told a friend about Evers, explaining: I want her to help me (and everyone else too) to not miss this wonderful girl who knows tons of stuff and who writes and thinks like few people do ... I've never missed Omaha or the U.S., this time, I will. You see and you're telling me that I'm going to have a great time. I'll have a good time but you know, you won't be there. I told you that I'm obsessive (but don't freak out, I'm not like Jeffrey Dohmer, is that how you write his name?) and when I really like someone I'm like that, this doesn't usually happen to me. Recio asserts that when I really like someone should have been translated as `when I am impressed by someone.' Recio's next message, sent the next day, began by asking: Where are you? The truth is, I've been going on all day without any news from you and it's making me crazy. Have you heard of a drug called Michelle, I have an addiction to it now. It's just that I'm not going to be here much longer to talk with my pal and I'm a little down about it. Recio says that it's making me crazy actually meant `I am annoyed.' Recio went on to write that she was not disappointed with Evers' desire to marry and start a family: You should know by now after all we've talked about that it would have to be something really huge to disappoint me. It would be impossible. On the contrary: what worries me is how good I feel with you ... do you thin[k] that I should separate myself a little from you to see you more distantly? Do you think it would be good if I were to disappear in Spain and show up again in August? I don't know. I admire you and I love talking to you and leaving is making me feel badly. Maybe you would advise me to take some distance... I'm going to make you crazy. Pardon me for talking like that but I'm a little tired. I don't know if I should have told you that. But I know you'll understand and give me your opinion, you have nothing to lose. Maybe it's just my tiredness and lack of control and courtesy on my part. Hey, I'm sorry. Please, don't get mad, okay? Before getting mad, think about this person talking to you who really holds you in esteem and who doesn't have bad intentions. Okay? But what do you want, I feel phenomenal with you. Yes. Recio's next message, sent the next day, was much shorter. Recio wrote: You are right, I'm exaggerating. Don't pay any attention to me. The truth is, I deserve a cake (I've behaved in a silly way )[.] Thanks for scolding me, I think that in Spain I'll get back to my common senses.... Can I write you these days even if you don't answer because you're busy? ... Okay! Come on, don't get mad. That afternoon, Recio wrote: I answered your message and you didn't answer me, especially knowing what I said to you yesterday.... I thought that you weren't answering me because you were busy writing your dissertation. You know what? Yes, I am nervous, impatient and what's more I get desperate with people who I care for, but these defects, I think they are small in the face of some of the virtues that I've shown. I think you need a different type of person different than me.... Your hard attitude has insulted me. You know, it's better just to be colleagues in our work and that's it. Don't give me any lessons and I'm sorry for having been so sincere and sentimental with you. But I don't want to deal with a person so tough who forgets all my good traits for one little error. Thanks for the punch. We'll see each other (what choice do we have?) in August. The final e-mail was sent several days later, apparently responding to another message from Evers. Recio wrote: I was offended because you told me you were writing your dissertation, you embarrassed me ( by not answering my email) and it hurt me because I was busting my head to figure out how to get used to having less contact with you (since it would be hard in Sitges to have e-mail, etc). I don't know, maybe it wasn't that big of a deal. I don't know. But what I do know is that, I don't understand you and you don't understand me. It would be better to be in person to see if we can communicate. I'm not mad anymore but I'm scared, because I'm not like all these proud imbeciles here. They have fucked me enough around here. I want peace with you and the best is to wait to see each other because from a distance I am afraid. Recio claims that you embarrassed me actually meant `you told me a big lie' and that maybe it wasn't that big of a deal actually meant `maybe it was not a lie.' Recio also claims that the profanity attributed to her no longer carries its literal meaning in Spanish and is no longer particularly profane; rather, it means `to annoy, pester.' (For example, an equivalent English idiom might be to screw with someone.) Recio concluded: Thanks for wishing me a good trip. The truth is, I need to rest. We'll see each other in August and with peace, and pardon me if I reacted like that but it's just that it hurt me like a pair of swords in my side, I don't know why but that's what I felt. Let's just leave it at that. It isn't important. Good luck with your dissertation and now let's be in peace and harmony, nothing ever happened. You can blame my emotional immaturity or whatever you like. But everything's alright, eh? Nothing happened. August is just around the corner.