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i'm always getting hurt whether it's intentional or not. then when i tell people, i come off as crazy and i just don't see why it matters if i exist sometimes. i feel so down at times i can't even get through the day. i don't know what to do. i'm a terrible person because of it. | i feel like giving up sometimes | 7390hj | get help please. there are people who love and support you and ou don't deserve to spend your days feeling like this. you deserve joy and happiness. a therapist could help you find out what is stopping you from getting there. | advice | 7390hj |
i am utterly unable to access face-to-face therapy in my area but i need it. i want to access free online therapy but i get rejected because i’m 1. a minor 2. suicidal the thing is, i’m not physically able to harm myself because i don’t have the means or desire, i just wish i were dead. online counseling for my age requires parental consent, which i can’t get. if i lied about my age and suicidal ideation, could i get in trouble? | what might be some consequences if i lie to an online therapist? | f822z7 | the most important consequence is that you won't get the help you need, you will get help for your fake self - an adult whose depression is not as severe as your own. i get that you are in a difficult situation. are you in the us? many states don't require parents to know about therapy and free therapy is often available. why don't you want to be honest about your suicidal ideation ? if you aren't honest, it can't be addressed. | askatherapist | f822z7 |
(don't normally post on reddit so please forgive me if i'm unintentionally breaking etiquette or something.) so as the title says i stopped smoking a few days ago, on the 4th of july. before then i smoked every day for about 2 years with a few breaks once in a while. since then i've had very low appetite and have barely been able to eat, which i expected. but i've taken breaks in the past and this time it's more extreme. most times i've tried to eat during the past few days my mouth practically rejects the food and i involuntarily spit it back up instead of naturally swallowing it, so i have to force it down very uncomfortably. and even when i can eat i've been getting nauseous and throwing it up half the time. as a result i've had about one meal a day this week and thrown up almost every day. so far today i feel a little better and managed to eat most of a chicken sandwich without trouble but my stomach still feels kind of weird, though not nauseous yet. i'm getting worried i might possibly have an ulcer or something and i do plan on going to a doctor if this persists, but i don't know if this could just be withdrawal symptoms because i'm so used to only eating when i'm high. i'm a thinner male, 22yo, who's always had relatively low appetite and i typically smoke to help myself eat a healthy amount, so i feel it could be possible that my body just needs to get used to eating sober again. i'm obviously not coming to r/leaves for medical advice but i do want to know if anyone's ever experienced this when quitting and i figured this was the best pool of people to ask. | quit smoking 4 days ago. have had nausea and extremely low appetite. worried about possible health issues and wondering if this is normal. | 6m2dq1 | is normal, don't worry. try smoothies until you adjust. force yourself to eat food. take b12 | leaves | 6m2dq1 |
tagged as a vent i guess.... i have severe adhd that affects literally every aspect of my life to the point where despite being medicated, i can barely maintain focus on a conversation and easily forget or don't absorb information and have to clarify over and over until whoever i'm talking to, usually other people who also have adhd, get pissed and think i'm just not interested or not listening. or when i say i am going to do something and then even though i take my meds, it takes me hours just to get myself to start the task, which makes me look lazy or unreliable even though during all those hours, i'm literally on the verge of an internal meltdown because i'm like begging and pleading to myself to please just be useful like please just let me do this very basic thing. and then when i get angrily confronted and i honestly say that it's because of my adhd, bc it legitimately is, i get in one form or another the response "well i have adhd too, etc etc" as a way of dismissing me as though i'm exaggerating, or not being able to access basic basic basic thoughts and words mid sentence and just freezing because i stop functioning out of nowhere, thus pissing people off by seeming like i'm just trying to annoy them, it's like.......... am i really just gonna be like this forever? is my entire life literally just doomed to consist of people constantly getting pissed at me and then me not having any real way of defending myself?? (i'm beating a dead horse at the choir at this point, but dang this is so distressing i can't stand it) tldr; i'm sad, folks | having adhd so severe that even other people with adhd think you're just making excuses | f43cbh | i feel like this is more than adhd. i would follow up with a psychiatrist or psychologist and ask for a full evaluation. | adhd | f43cbh |
this is going to sound weird, but it's a metformin question. i take 2 a day, and the bottle has 60 pills. my gyno wrote that i could get 6 refills by june 14 next year. but my last refill will run out way before then. why didn't he just make it where i could get enough refills to last the whole year? i'm 26, female, 5'3", 135 lbs, nonsmoker, pcos, i take ashlyna and metformin. | only 6 refills? | 8sdogu | that sounds like an oversight. when i've made a mistake like that it's because i was thinking six month appointment when doing the meds. you have six months to sort it out, but i would call or send a message now to let him know this isn't going to work. | askdocs | 8sdogu |
one of the books i read, finding a purpose in the pain by james fenley lists 8 traits of an enabler and addict. enabler: needs to take care of someone, controlling, independent, self-critical, responsible for others' happiness, hard time asking for help, talks a lot, hard worker, hard time saying no, can't express feelings. addict: needs to be taken care of, dependent, blames others, needs problems, selfish, isolated, self-centered, nontrusting. i can see aspects of both in myself. without getting to in depth into my own situation, what are other people's thoughts on this? | can an enabler be an addict? | 199eya | in a sense, i'd say a traditional enabler would be addicted to the addict; or maybe addicted to the relationship. | addiction | 199eya |
nearly 200 people commented with a majority of the comments with name calling and hate speech. idiot stupid dumbass dumbf*** everything i see on facebook reminds me of it. everything i see on instagram reminds me of it. everything i see on netflix reminds me of it. everything i see on twitter reminds me of it. everything i watch on youtube reminds me of it. i can't keep living like this. i am back on my anti depressants atleast. fluoxetine (am) and risperidone (pm). despite some of the really nasty comments, alot of them were actually reality mild just everything reminds of this horrible social media event with strangers who were mostly american. our canadian gun laws are very different were not everyone can get a gun without special licensing and training. i suffer several mental health issues. if see attractive caucasian women with guns and imagine them making fun of me. "oh yeah, that (spells my name) i'd shoot that r*****. i'm just a 24/m trying to live my life. | i was a victim of a horrible online cyber bullying attack i want family and friends to have my back. | egw8sd | i'm not trying to minimize what you're experiencing, and i'm sorry about what happened to you, but, in the grand scheme of things, 200 people is a small group of bored people. it didn't go viral and, honestly, most of those people have probably forgotten about whatever it is you posted. while it certainly sounds like you feel you were personally attacked, do you think you're giving those people your power to allow them to hurt you? you are giving them much more credit than they deserve. reserve your power for yourself. unfortunately, if you do not feel that you are mentally tough enough to endure the incessant drama, criticism, and attacks on social media, or if it is too triggering, perhaps you should take a break. live your life irl. | mentalillness | egw8sd |
honestly, i can't take it any more.i can't concentrate at all throughout every prayer.i'm open for suggestions. | any muslims here strugling to pray ? | b498k8 | can i ask what the purpose of praying as a muslim is? as in is it an act of worship, or quiet meditation to contemplate, or ... yeah. i'm not religious but it seems similar to mundfulness to me (could be dead wrong). if that's the case maybe practice some mindfulness for a little while and add in prayers a little bit at a time until you get to how much you want to do? mindfulness takes a long time to practice and starts off as a minute or two a day. it would really help you to be more present in your prayers if you practiced this and got better at this first. it may mean that initially you do less praying than you feel is needed, which would be hard on your spirituality, but you can focus on the long term that you will get much more out of your prayers which may really suffer otherwise. | adhd | b498k8 |
i went to therapy in 2017. one of the main reasons why i quit was due to the realization that i didn't actually want to change. i wanted to change and be different but i didn't want to put in the effort, so i quit to prevent any more time being wasted. i'm going back to therapy on april 8th. i am going for different reasons than last time. i don't know if i should go back because i don't think i'll be willing to change. i think this because i've contacted the crisis text line and they wanted to come up with plans to stop me from self harming and being depressed but i quickly realized i didn't want to do what they suggested. although, i enjoyed talking to them. | should i still go to therapy if i am reluctant on changing | fv00u2 | i think this is some good insight on your part . some people don't want to change, but blame external factors instead. what do you hope to get from therapy? change does not necessarily need to be your goal, and i think it is important to share your goal with your therapist. i have heard lots of people say that a person can't chance unless they want to . as someone who has done lots of work with court mandated folks , i don't think that is always true. are you open to group therapy? that can be helpful for people who don't want to change . | askatherapist | fv00u2 |
i met a guy last year at work. we both like each other, but there’s a problem. i come from a broken home and have never had a boyfriend in my life. i’m 31, just so you know. up until now, i have never really missed having someone in my life because i know that’s a lot of work and drama. guys have shown interest, but i have always rebuffed them fearing anything serious. now this guy is really nice – or at least i think he is. he has asked me out couple of times, but i had genuine reasons to turn him down. now i’m not sure whether i should continue rebuffing him like i have done in past, or if i should just give this a shot. i have this strange fear that i’m probably just one of his many crushes and i’m going to end up looking like a fool. plus it’s a delicate situation what with all the prying colleagues. what should i do? | pursuing my first relationship at 31. am i stupid? | 6b8jfx | you could just go get coffee with him. avoid the phrase "broken home" unless he's ralph reed. | relationship_advice | 6b8jfx |
noones gonna care or read this post anyway but i just wanted to say that i have reached out for help. i went to my unis website and looked for anything that had something to do with counseling. i found a formular, i filled it out, described my problems and that i would like them to help me find a therapist and talk to me about medications. i just hit send. it feels weird. but i know im gonna get a reply. soon im gonna sit in front of a counselor and then hopefully a professional therapist and talk about my problems. ive been hurt so much in my life. im so broken. ive cried several times the past days. but i did it. i reached out for help. if youre struggling please consider this too. i dont know why i didnt do this sooner. but i figured - its time. im tired of being so depressed. something has to change. | i have reached out for professional help. | 8ci78h | reaching out it tough, but its the first step of the process, so good luck. also licensed counselors will be able to help you equally compared to a therapist. good luck connecting with someone that can help! :) | mentalhealth | 8ci78h |
hi r/askdocs, i'm 23, male, 1m82 and 59kg. i have a history of compulsive behaviour that makes me prone to addictions as one of the many symptoms that comes packaged with my decade long depression. i have gotten a lot better by myself and no longer consider myself chronically depressed. recently i have sought out professional help to try and get my anxieties and all the other nice stuff left over from my depressive years under control. i explained to the doctor that i was using cannabis illegally to subdue my anxieties but it had gotten out of hand, and now if i try to stop, it exacerbates my anxieties and leads to attacks. the doctor prescribed me xanax to help deal with this. my question is, if i use xanax to deal with attacks in absence of cannabis, am i not likely to replace one addiction with the other? secondly: can i take it only when anxieties occur? or rather is it that for the treatment to work i have to take them every night as prescribed? thirdly: i will be seeing a psycho-analyst as part of my overall treatment however, is it worth seeing an adictologist as well? i realize these aren't the most pointed questions, any opinions on my situation would be very appreciated. edit: sorry for the title gore. | xanax prescribed to tackle anxieties due to depression that has resurfaced as i have stopped smokong cannabis which i previously used for the same reasons. | chbdaf | these are conversations that you should probably have with your doctor. i'm not a big fan of xanax for a number of reasons, but it can be used to help you get through an adjustment to going without cannabis. the goal is not to get you addicted. xanax would usually be taken as needed, but your doctor is the one with all the details and who should have a clear plan that you should understand. you could see an addiction specialist if there's an addiction problem, but cannabis often doesn't require that. if you can stop, you can stop. | askdocs | chbdaf |
it literally gets me no where and the only time i get treated is when i lie..i don't like doing that. for example. one 'psychiatrist' i saw i was honest about one of my meds, ativan, that have taken for years. naturally i have a tolerance. i told him i take two of the one milligrams to function. he said " so you are taking more then i told you too?" me " i guess i am" him" well i am going to have to ask you to leave my practice" i just said ok no problem' but i'm thinking to myself..like damn i can't even tell a shrink the truth? how am i evef going to be treated or get therapy if i can't be honest?? this isn't the only time just one spec example. | what happened to being able to tell your doctors the truth? | 7f0n6k | whilst i agree that it's not good to take more of anything than recommended, i am a strong proponent of not discharging anyone because of it. i mean, what's the point of that? | askdocs | 7f0n6k |
i really struggle to communicate with people when i'm not face to face with them. i can talk to people fine in person (i work on a reception desk), but anything else is a challenge. i stutter really badly when i use a phone, and forget what the conversation is about randomly. i can't talk to people on games - even typing is hard. i'm frightened of sending messages to people, for example replying to them on twitter (i haven't opened the app today after sending something to someone). i don't understand what's wrong with me. i used to talk/message my friends for hours a day until i stopped talking to them a year ago, now everything is hard. the only good thing is i am a lot more positive now that i am alone. | communicating is hard when not in person | 9388mh | there's nothing seriously wrong with you. i'm an extrovert, very good with social situations and in fact very confident. i have a good amount of anxiety when it comes to talking to folks on the phone. the reason that i've figured out is that one of my greatest strengths in communication is reading people's body language and non-verbal communication. it's a gift and a curse because while i'm much better than the average person with this, i often rely on it and feel very uncomfortable when i'm not able to see the person so that i can read body-language. all this to say is that you're not alone and there's nothing seriously wrong with you unless it makes your anxiety so bad that it causes problems with your regular functioning. if it does, you just have to accept that you're probably better at a lot of people in reading body language which really is a helpful and awesome trait to have, but are going to have to come up with some extra strategies to help you in situations where you can't. for instance, i always try to have in person communication if i have the option. when i don't or it's just not good for time management, i'll often write down what i want to say or open with on the phone so if my anxiety kicks in, i have a script. this works wonders for me, but if you try out different things, you'll find exactly what works best for you. | mentalhealth | 9388mh |
what is it about our brains that we are so ready to stop and then once we feel better we think, oh i can have just a little more? that keeps happening and i know better. suggestions to help stop thoughts stupid thoughts? i want to be done for good!!! | suggestions to stop a relapse | 4uo6x7 | naltrexone and a pile of sheets? | stopdrinking | 4uo6x7 |
my friend has an account on here and i know her username. she doesn't know that i know. she recently posted that her family is going through some troubling stuff. what do i do about this situation? | my friend is probably broke. | e648vj | why not check in on her? you can say "hey how have things been going for you?" you can even say that you feel like she's been acting weird and you just want to make sure she's okay. i wouldn't mention the posts, i would allow her to tell you about it on her own terms. she may not want to talk about it at all, in which case you should respect that and drop that subject, but maybe you can find some way to help by talking to her. | advice | e648vj |
finals are here. i haven't studied. i can't muster up a worry anymore. nothing really matters. | i stopped seriously planning for my future because i know that if it ever gets too bad, i can suicide | 3wx9ts | i realized i had started parting from my love affair with suicide when i bought a muffin tin with a life time warranty. seriously. i was paralyzed at first, and the realization became a bit overwhelming. i saw that by buying this nicer item, i was planning for a future and trying to make a wise investment in my future (you know.. for the muffins..) i finally accepted it and bought the muffin tin. i made cranberry orange and they were not very good. | depression | 3wx9ts |
been working with the mentally ill for almost 5 years (now as a psych rn), working acute psych, detox, rehab, and adolescent. i came from medical nursing and, for the first few years, felt my understanding of mental illness growing. lately, however, i've become more confused (and/or disillusioned) by the entire field. as for my confusion - in acute psych in particular, the lack of patient insight distresses me. i've watched documentaries, psas, etc. where seemingly "normal" people speak about their struggles with schizophrenia or bipolar. my patients almost exclusively show no insight into their condition or are in some type of denial. they seem to exist only in the present, with very little insight into their past or future. i've had professors, physicians, professional athletes whose mental illness now defines them. they are no longer able to function as they once did. do they remember their past lives in detail? are they terrified/confused by the drastic change in their life? they don't appear to be. what's going through the mind of a schizophrenic with mostly negative symptoms - staring into the ceiling day after day, saying nothing? i'm mostly disillusioned by the pharmaceutical side of mental illness. maybe it's just my current facility (or a few of the facility's physicians), but is it common to continually chase symptoms with new meds? i have many pt's on 10-20 meds, with new orders daily (e.g. seroquel tid, wellbutrin bid, xanax tid, cogentin, benadryl, buspar, vistaril prn, zyprexa prn, trazodone qhs.....plus medical - robaxin, neurontin, etc). again, i'm an rn not an md, but at some point, i start to wonder if there's any way for someone to be stable on this amount of meds. sorry this is kind of all over the place...having a hard time gathering my own thoughts and emotions lately and that might be part of why i'm having such a difficult time lately with this stuff. i have extreme empathy for my pt's and love working in mental health - i don't think i'll ever go back to medical nursing. at this rate, however, if i don't get a good grasp on whether what we're doing is the right thing (or at least leading towards the right thing), i may have to leave the field. guess i'm hoping for someone to put it in a way that makes more sense to me. | 5+ years working in mental health, feeling more disillusioned/confused daily | 3xwzxv | like another commenter said, self care is so important. that needs to be your first priority from now on. | mentalhealth | 3xwzxv |
i;m a 21 year old male and ive been on zoloft for about 9 months about a year ago for generalized anxiety disorder. now i'm not sure if this is from taking zoloft or weirdly drinking to much beer last summer, but i''ll try to explain what happened. i went out one night last summer and had some beer at a bar. i had quite abit and the following night my face got really red and hot. ive been drinking beer for a while and that never happened. the next day my nose was red and i couldn't take hot showers anymore without my face getting red and blotchy. now my stomach has this warm sensation and my face has red dots all over it. i'm not sure if this was from taking zoloft, but this happened about 2 months after stopping the zoloft. | can ssris change how you absorb nutrients? | 6pkki6 | yeah im fairly sure it wasn't the sertraline. | askdocs | 6pkki6 |
i recently started seeing a guy i met in one of my college academic clubs. we have everything in common from music to our dream career. he asked me on a date, it went amazing, and he wanted a second date. i said instead we should go to a local open mic downtown because we both love live music. he agreed, and plans to meet my friends and i down there (i was going there tomorrow with my friends anyways, i just included him in the plans). well, the two friends i invited ended up inviting a bunch of other friends, and i quickly realized he might get scared off. i am the exact opposite of all my friends. they are really in to hooking up, they dress way more provocatively, and are huge flirts. when they go out they can't drink casually, they need to do 10 shots and go home sloppy drunk and crying. i'm worried he will get scared off. i know two of the girls just got dumped a few days ago and specifically told me they couldn't wait to get hammered and talk to me about it. the thing is... i do not want to miss this open mic, i've been excited about it for a few weeks and was going without him anyways. my solution is to go with the guy and see my friends down there, but sit alone with him. during the show they won't be able to walk around, so i'll be alone with him. however, part of me wonders if the two of us should just go somewhere different and i come up with a lie to get out of going with my friends. should i bite the bullet and introduce him to my friends who definitely will be drunk, definitely will be handing out their numbers to guys, and most likely will hit on him or cry? or should i go alone with him, or do something else? **tl;dr:** i like this new guy and he plans to meet my friends and i down at an open mic tomorrow, but my friends like getting sloppy drunk and might scare him off since i am the opposite. should i still take him, or find another last minute idea and ditch my friends? | i'm worried my female friends will scare away my new guy? | 6dm78r | i have never heard of a can't miss open mic night. is someone you care about performing? meet up with guy. go for that one performance. say hi to your friends. bail. | relationship_advice | 6dm78r |
i have been drinking for more than 10 years im 27 i think i started drinking when i was 16 i can't pass a week without drinking twice or more in a week but not for two days straight i drink nearly one liter of whiskey in a week am i considered an alcoholic ? and what are the withdrawal symptoms of alcohol ? | am i an alcoholic ? | j9cren | when you drink, do you lose control of how much you drink after the first one? do you find yourself thinking about drinking often when you are not drinking? do you feel like you’re not really comfortable or at peace when you are sober? if you answer yes to any or all of these questions, than you probably have an issue. usually, having to ask the question is a good indicator that it may be a good time to stop too. | alcoholism | j9cren |
my boyfriend “andrew” and i (31m and 32f) recently started couples’ counseling (last saturday). because of social distancing, our first session was on zoom. then the therapist said he’d meet with us individually in the next week and then have us all come back together for another session following that. my boyfriend and i have each had our individual sessions now, through zoom, of course, and yesterday i got an email from our therapist saying that he thinks it’s best if he works only with me for the foreseeable future. i’m super confused; i actually am seeing an individual therapist separately already, for childhood abuse, anxiety, and depression. we were starting to see this counselor to help our relationship, but if he meets only with me i feel that defeats the purpose. i told my partner and he doesn’t seem too bothered by the therapist meeting only with me. what would be a therapist’s reasoning for meeting with only one partner and almost considering couple’s counseling an afterthought? i’m thinking either i must be causing all the problems — that can’t be true, though — or there’s some good reasoning in a therapist’s training, or he’s not a good therapist. does anyone have any opinions? thank you! | couples therapist wants to see only me now | ggh5s5 | is your therapist an lmft? as a couples therapist i will separate the couple into individual sessions, but will offer to see both individually and will continue couples working as well. i typically separate into individual for a few sessions after the initial session to check for dv and other contraindications for couples work and to gather more info for assessment purposes. but i do not separate into only seeing one member of the couple in lieu of couples work. it makes the one singled out to feel like they are the problem and negates any rapport i’ve built with the couple (which is my primary client). it also gets into an ethically troublesome situation where i’m now building a relationship with one member of the couple and excluding the other. if you already have an individual therapist you are well within your rights as a client to decline individual and have them speak with your therapist so they can work together in better serving you. you are also allowed to ask why they think their idea of only you is preferred in their mind. you can also tell them to kick rocks and find a new therapist who will work with both of you. | askatherapist | ggh5s5 |
caucasian/23/f/166lbs/5'3"/no smoking or drinking; born with arrhythmia that's genetic. i've been having infrequent episodes of low blood sugar symptoms occurring randomly every few days. it can happen right after a meal or even an hour after. i get shaky, i feel hungry, i break into a cold sweat and my arrhythmia is aggravated by it so i experience heart palpitations. as i'm typing this i'm having the exact same symptoms--and i had a piece of candy about an hour ago. do i have hypoglycemia? should i be worried? it's 11:30 pm, i don't want to disturb the family by getting up to eat something. edit: current medications: pristiq, seroquel, intuniv, bc oral contraceptive. | struggling with low blood sugar issues intermittently | 898v64 | most "low blood sugar" symptoms aren't due to low blood sugar, especially in people who aren't taking medication that can lower blood sugar (i.e. diabetics on insulin or oral agents). what you're describing could also be panic/anxiety. of course, the only way to know is to have some testing done during one of these episodes. | askdocs | 898v64 |
my boyfriend of 5 years has been on the decline for the last 4 1/2 years. both due to his past and a sudden sickness that took away his ability to eat his favorite foods, he’s an insomniac and never has energy. he just wanted to die, he hates who he is i feel like i do try really hard to make his life better by coming up with good food, were together all the time. he doesn’t really have other friends, will not see a therapist i have asked many times. i’ve tried to offer or suggest things to do but he’s so closed off. idk what to do... any tips to help break this cycle? as a side question does electric shock therapy work? i’ve done some reading and was hoping he could try it, tho i think they force you to go to therapy. | how to help someone who’s completely given up. | fpon4i | depression is so hard ! it just sucks the motivation out of people. even if he wants to get better , he may feel helpless and hopeless , which makes it even harder . you mentioned a physical illness . is that being managed? is his doctor aware that he is this depressed? i have no idea what his health condition it, but it would important to rule out a health condition or medication that could be impacting his mood. would he be willing to talk to someone online? it may feel less intimidating. perhaps you can make an agreement that if he attends x sessions , you will lay off a little bit . re ect , it is not an option right now if he has not first tried therapy and frontline med options. the long-term side effects are really intense. he is lucky to have you ! supporting and loving a partner through depression is hard work. | askatherapist | fpon4i |
hello, i am 19 years old, male, 84kg, take no medications, don't smoke and have had no serious illnesses in the past 10 years. lately i've been attempting to cut down on sleep. i've tried sleeping for 4.5hrs (1am - 5:30am) during the night, taking three 20-minute naps spaced out at 5 hour intervals. after about a week i started getting used to it until i read an article discussing the various health risks associated with getting less than 6 hours of sleep a night: heart problems, various cancers, etc. first i was off-put but then thought i could at least partially offset the effects by eating healthy and exercising (which i do). and so continued with my schedule until i read that less than 6 hours of sleep can also kill brain cells, cause alzheimers and various other illnesses associated with the brain. i was very concerned by this and began sleeping 8 hours. i've been reading more on brain cell damage from lack of sleep and there's a relatively small volume of research surrounding the subject. does anybody have any ideas concerning this? does lack of sleep effect mental functionality long term? and more importantly, is any damage incurred from lack of sleep permanent? thank you | does lack of sleep effect mental functionality long term? | cv0mw1 | it's hard to do very robust studies because you can't assign people randomly to specific amounts of sleep for long periods of time. the best we have is observational and there are so many other contributing factors that it's hard to extract signal from noise. what we think we know is that chronic lack of sleep has negative effects on many aspects of mental and physical health. it's likely that the effect happens over long periods of time, not from a night or two of bad sleep here and there, but there's no way to know. for example, consistent lack of sleep seems to be causally linked to obesity. sleeping better may not reverse obesity once it has happened. the fundamental that sleep medicine feels confident about is that despite all the internet hype about crazy sleep schedules freeing up extra time for you, it doesn't work very well. you need about 8 hours of sleep, give or take an hour or so. there are rare people who are exceptions, but that's what the vast majority of us need to be healthy. | askdocs | cv0mw1 |
so my girlfriend and i of 3 years had a pretty bad fight, like almost ended it, about 6 months and since things haven't felt right. she has pretty severe self esteem issues and i try to be the nicest guy ever to her. she claims i said hurtful things to her that she misconstrued into me putting her down. we have since made up but she still refuses to be intimate. i still compliment her, take her out on dates to the movies, nice restaurants, just like we were at the early stages of dating. i do everything to make her life easier. she refuses to do anything sexual with me. i have to beg her to make out with me. i have tried talking to her and she says she's hurt and i need patience with her. she says she still loves me and wants to be with me and swears there isn't anyone else. am i wrong to think something's up? i love her and could see myself with her forever, but not if i'm doomed to be in a sexless marriage? | i (27m) am in a sexless relationship with my (28f) girlfriend | 6lforx | go to couple therapy. a sexless relationship is not sustainable. | relationship_advice | 6lforx |
i called the pharmacy and they have not received the prescription yet. it's been about 30 hours since i left the doctor's office. i don't want to bother them by asking too soon, how long should i expect to have to wait before they send the prescription to the pharmacy? and after how long should i call the doc and ask what's going on? | how long does it take doctors to send prescription to the pharmacy? | 8y4owm | you should probably call your doctor. most doctors have an electronic system that sends a prescription to the pharmacy instantly and it can be done during an appointment. some still call it in. either way, it will usually happen by the end of the day and i suspect either the doctor forgot or, quite possibly, it got sent to the wrong pharmacy. | askdocs | 8y4owm |
to start off, i'm very soon-to-be seventeen. just to warn anyone in case this might be a hormonal issue. i don't know if somethings wrong with me or not but let me try and explain. i have *very* **severe** mood swings, so it would seem. i can start a day off amazingly. feel hyper and as if i have literally the ability to do anything. walk to school with a smile, all the while i'm dancing. i can sit down and have a laugh with my friends, but then without any warning in the space of 1-5 minutes (sometimes it can happen **very** rapidly) it feels as though literally **all** of the energy has taken out of my body and i feel immediately depressed. i have very dark thoughts, low motivation and all sorts of issues. this can happen very many times in one day as well. i have self harmed a numerous amount of times and had many sucidal thoughts. i don't necessarily act on them, when i cut myself i honestly see it as a way of releaving stress, and i don't tell anyone because i don't want the unnecessary attention. i don't understand how i could possibly be *only* depressed, because how could i be so happy one moment and then feel as though life's pointless the next? it's not just feeling overwhelmingly energetic, hyper and happy, or disgustingly unhappy and depressed. it can also become psychotic. having rather crude feelings towards someone who has recently irritated me. this has happened ever since the summer of last year and i've honestly been scared to go to the hospital due to the medical record and what damage it can do for job hunting. i've resorted to telling my friends i have **bipolar disorder** to let them leave me alone when i go into an instant down mood. even today i felt amazing for the first half of the day, and then while walking home i felt worthless. could someone please assist me on what i may have? i really would like to know the severity of the situation. i don't believe it's hormones as i do not take things in a dramatic way. please ask questions because i may of missed somethings out. | do i have some sort of mental illness? | 5zl6dc | uk doc here. i don't think you've much to lose by seeing your gp if you're worried. book yourself an appointment. | askdocs | 5zl6dc |
i’m a 26 year old male. white, 5’6” 194 lbs. i have unexplained muscle fatigue that no lab results have justified yet so i asked about more obscure labs like testosterone which my pcp agreed to test. my results were: total testosterone: 280. free testosterone serum: 58. the test was done at 830am per the doctors order. is t at its highest or lowest at 830? this t appears to be at the low end of the spectrum. as a 26 year old i expected to be in the median range. is this value abnormally low despite being within range? thank you | please help me understand my testosterone test results | 9qjadu | testosterone is highest in the morning. as a 26 year old male you should be on the bell curve, and you are. some men naturally have higher testosterone, and some lower; the median is the middle value, but with high variance. i have seen no reason to believe that treating low normal testosterone is of benefit despite all the hype from a predatory pseudo-medical industry of hawking testosterone as a kind of cure-all for men. | askdocs | 9qjadu |
first time poster. i have been a follower on here for about six months now. every day i’ve read all of your successes and failures and have been envious of the determination and dedication you all put forth in your sober lives. alcohol has controlled me throughout my twenties. moving away from my home town helped with being over indulgent, but still i craved a drink every single day, and gave into the craving, every single day. i could blame my personal life, i could blame my stressful job, i could excuse it as a social activity - but i won’t. i lack the ability to stop once i begin. it is my inability to stop, the hangovers which have become my everyday routine, the countless dollars i have spent trying to drown the memories of friends i have lost because of alcohol, it is all of these things that i’ve put up with and never addressed. i always knew i had a problem, but would simply brush it off with an ‘at least i’m not that bad, it could be worse’ mentality. the reality of my situation is, i have a problem. last night, my girlfriend called me crying (we live an hour apart) and told me that she’s pregnant. she was scared, i was scared, i was crying, i was panicked, and i was also drunk. i ran to my car to drive to her aid, but quickly pulled over on the side of the rode, and told her through my tears, that i couldn’t come to her because i was not okay to drive. the first moment my family needed me, i was unable to be there because of my problem with alcohol. i turned around, went home, and immediately poured all of my liquor down the drain. nothing will ever inhibit my ability to be there for my family ever again. it is for myself, my family, and my unborn child; i will not drink with you today. | i’m going to be a father. | 70y3hl | 3 months pregnant here, and i can tell you your family will be so much better off with you sober--including yourself. there will be so many feels, and now you won't have to drink to unfeel them. congrats papa. i won't drink with you today! | stopdrinking | 70y3hl |
this happened in illinois. i have suffered from migraines and was referred to a neurologist. i am a 26 year old female, and doctor was fairly young (maybe low to mid 30s). during the visit, it felt like he was coming on very strong to me. he kept complimenting my looks, telling me how amazing i am, how good my body looks, etc. i am a stay at home mom right now with a toddler. the whole visit was extremely flirtatious and made me uncomfortable. i never once said anything like "thank you" because of how weird and uncomfortable it was. when i would change the subject or ignore the complement, he would almost act as if he had been rejected. ​ the worst part was when he asked me if i would be interested in a more 'natural' treatment approach to migraines. he said that orgasms can help reduce migraines, and kept following up asking me about how often my husband and i have sex, telling me i could 'take care of myself' since i stay home, etc. he even said "..i know some women aren't able to have orgasms, are you able to?" ​ obviously i won't be going back to see him again, but i am curious if he technically did something wrong in this situation. he never touched me, or anything physical. i just feel like this type of behavior shouldn't be allowed, but when it is just his word vs. mine, there isn't much i can do now. i did some light research of my own after the visit, and it doesn't seem like orgasms are really a medically recognized treatment, so i feel that he might have overstepped by recommending that option? the situation seemed inappropriate to me based on the power dynamics of a patient - physician relationship, but i don't know if he technically did something wrong here. ​ i checked with the state board and his license is active. couldn't find anything online that would indicate he has a record, or something like this has happened before. do i just let it go? obviously all the upstanding docs here on r/askdocs wouldn't condone this type of behavior... but is this a gray area? required info: \- 26 years old \-female \- 5'-4" \- 115lbs \- caucasian | physician acted inappropriate and made me uncomfortable | 9ys3zi | i’m a physician. he was completely inappropriate. please report him so that he won’t be able to do this to others. i’m sorry he did this to you! | askdocs | 9ys3zi |
i've seen a handful of posts where op talks about struggling to deal with another person's relapse. they feel surprised, they feel let down, they feel angry, they feel responsible, they want to help, etc. i think it's probably natural to feel any one of these things, especially if you haven't been sober for very long. i've also noticed that the more experienced among us, some of whom i admire very much, never seem surprised to hear that another person has relapsed. not that they act cold or uncaring, it's more that they act a bit more matter-of-fact about the whole thing. i assume that they once felt many of the things listed above, but experience has taught them that other people's sobriety isn't something they can control. so they don't get personally invested in it. and i do think it's easy to get personally invested in another person's sobriety, even if you don't realize you're doing it at the time. the sad reality is that relapse is fairly common. the longer one stays sober, the more relapse they'll see - strangers, acquaintances, friends, lovers - no one is immune. dealing with others' relapses is an issue each of us will face, and an issue that many people struggle with, but it's also an issue that doesn't get much airplay here on /r/stopdrinking. **questions**: *how did you learn to deal with other people's relapses? what lessons have your years taught you? can you recall a time in your early sobriety when you were astounded/shocked/hurt to hear that a friend had relapsed? tell us your stories.* (this post isn't in response to anything or anyone in particular, btw. it's just something that i see come up from time to time, and i thought the community could benefit from having this discussion.) (also feel free to weigh in on whether you'd have gone with *other people's* or *other peoples'*. i went with "other people's." i'm not 100% confident in that decision.) | let's talk about dealing with other people's relapses | 1yuilr | the best we can do is to stay in relationship with them, albeit in a safe environment. the shock and surprise we feel when someone we care about relapses to drinking or drug use is a consequence of not understanding the seriousness of the condition. we know its a bad problem but we don't really know how bad a problem it is. the who (world health organization) tabulates the amount of harm that different diseases cause and they found that alcoholism does more harm than malaria, tuberculosis and hiv combined. if you are abstinent you are quite the exception. pat yourself on the back or go to an aa meeting and somebody will pat it for you. the human brain is the organ that directs behavior and when its gets damaged, behavior is affected. when a person persists in behavior that is clearly damaging i suspect that the brain is not functioning in an optimum manner. appetites are acquired so that behavior can be automated and our appetites are established by our capacity to be rewarded. this leaves us vulnerable to the acquisition of an appetite for whatever is rewarding. anyone whose brain has been damaged to the point that its most powerful reward is an intoxicating substance is in grave danger and in need of medication to reduce the need for, and the power of, that substance. anticraving medications like naltrexone and acamprosate help but they are not enough. the most powerful reward available is positive relationship and substance abuse's worst consequence is the weakening of one's relationship to responsible people. as the condition worsens, the sufferer becomes frightening to responsible people and so they end up in relationship with people who are irresponsible and so less rewarding. | stopdrinking | 1yuilr |
i imagine it could possibly be triggering for victims of sexual assult. but i imagine that's a rare scenario that i'm reaching for. | is there any clear rules on showing cleavage or skin in your workplace? | bzlm50 | this would depend on the workplace; generally there are not clear rules. | askatherapist | bzlm50 |
i’m going crazy. i can’t stop making up horrible ridiculous scenarios in my head. or thinking about specific things on repeat. over and over and over. i’m so paranoid. paranoid that my fp is going to do something to hurt me or that everyone at work is talking shit about me or that everyone hates me. it’s constant. my mind will make up the oddest things. it’s ruining my life and my relationship. how do i make it stop? ps- i’m on lamictal, abilify, zoloft, and then some anti anxiety meds as needed. lamictal and zoloft are recent and i’ve switched meds a lot before that. i did have these problems before meds though. i just feel like i’m getting to a breaking point. | how to stop ruminating/obsessive thoughts? | bf4dtp | recognize and correct it. perform self care up the wazoo | bpd | bf4dtp |
[update below] fucking hell, i hate my brain. my boyfriend is coming home from a 6 month deployment. he lives out if state so i drove about 5 hours to where he lives so i can welcome him home at the airport. i stopped at chickfila and only brought my wallet in and carried my food to the car. i threw my wallet in the food bag. i used the food bag as trash. i stopped at the welcome center. thew the trash away. wanted to stop at walmart for a last minute welcome home gift. that's when i realized i don't have my wallet. fuckity fuck fuck! going back to see if it's still there. already put a freeze on my cards.... edit to add: update: it's worse than i thought. after driving back to the welcome center, and one of the employees grabbing gloves and digging through the trash with me, i found it........ in.... my..... bag..... :( i didn't have a lot of cash but i gave the lady what i had and thanked her for helping me! | accidentally threw my wallet away (out of state at a rest stop) | c0atb0 | that update made this post so much more adhd and i relate. i'm glad you found it but the frustration would be very real lol | adhd | c0atb0 |
i'm a male in my late 20s. i have depressions at the top of my skull on both sides, measuring about 3cmx5cm each. the sagittal suture is level with the rest of the skull. i've always had them, i think, but i only recently started noticing them. i do have a very long history of tension headaches and migraines (since high school) so i was wondering if it is related to my skull anatomy. it should be noted that i am obese but not hypertensive, diabetic, or hyperlipidemic. i have also started noticing a slight worsening of my short as well as long term memory recall that i ascribed to normal aging but this problem in recollection has been pointed out by my parents as well. i'm also a teetotaling non-smoker and non-drug user (medicinal or recreational). | bilateral depression in parietal bones in my skull | 51e710 | the skull is irrelevant, it's what's inside that counts. there's no significant association between minor skull differences and mental health that we are aware of. | askdocs | 51e710 |
i’m a teen and all my life up until last year or so i had very strong morals. i’d always call shit out and be nice to all people, even though i was generally unsociable, awkward and introverted. then last year i started opening up, and realizing how stupid i was for acting so pessimistically when it came to people... however with this came a couple more changes to my personalty. i think i’ve always been like this, but just never had any friends so it never dawned on me. i’m just a shit person to be honest. i enjoy mocking people, and constantly do. i constantly make jokes at other people’s expense just to get a laugh and i step on the weaker people everyone make fun of in order to feel good about myself. i act like i’m better then others. in my head, i’m literally worth more than them. and this just makes me feel so fucking bad. i want to change for the better, but just don’t know how. i feel weak. i feel like a person dominated by the thoughts of others, or more particularly those “on top”. i want to become a stronger person, a person who thinks for himself and does things based on what he thinks is right. but right now, i’m not that at all. i’m just a product of circumstance, and others around me. how do i develop a stronger personality and become a better person over all? all the while stop feeling shit about myself | i’m such a shitty person | euvdmk | i have a couple of ideas for you. they may or may not be the perfect fit for you, but you could try. it sounds like you have a couple of problems and you have the self-awareness to know that they are problems and to know that you want to change. that's good. the first problem you mentioned is that you put others down and insult them a lot. you know this is bad, and i think you already know you should try not to do that. have you ever tried the opposite? complimenting others, trying to find the good things in them instead of searching for something bad? what if you tried to compliment someone every day? the second problem you mentioned is that you feel you don't think for yourself, that your actions are always based on other people and not your true self. i think to work towards solving this, you need to understand yourself better. journaling may help with this. ask yourself - who do you want to be? what is a "good" person, in your opinion? what values do you have, or do you want to have? what do you want to do? what are some goals you have? what are some of your strengths? there's no right or wrong answers to these. if you don't know the answer to some, it may be worth doing some exploration. and know that these things take time. you may just need more life experience. we've all done some stupid shit in the past, but the important thing is that those things stay in the past. if you're working to change for the better, if you're making progress, remember to forgive those past mistakes. but there needs to be proof of that progress. what do you want to do to become better? | advice | euvdmk |
it’s nothing new, i’ve had this issue since 3rd grade. about a third of my days i get sick at least once, some years it’s not so bad but other times its worse. exercise forces an appetite, but it doesn’t help the food stay down. this unwelcomed purging really bothers me to the point i hate eating. at times it can be near impossible to swallow. relaxation techniques seem to help, and my journal/daily to do list is enough to make sure i eat at least something each day. if i don’t eat i can’t think properly, affecting all aspects of my life. its feels like i got punched in the stomach. i don’t want to be underweight, i desperately want to be healthy, but i don’t know how. i started taking pills for other health issues, it only makes it worse. i have talked to multiple doctors and therapist about it, they don’t seem to have a clue. do i just accept it, what can i do about this? | request: i struggle with eating and holding food down, any ideas as of why or how to improve? | aeu52o | does the description of rumination disorder resonate with you? | eatingdisorders | aeu52o |
i'm writing a script with a protagonist currently on prescribed medication because of his serious anxiety issues. i was wondering, if a patient like that would be allowed to carry a pocket knife? | are people on medication allowed to carry knives? | acxkoc | there is no license in the us required to carry a pocket knife. so essentially there is no mechanism to disallow it. but, a person's safety plan may not permit knives or guns. but a safety plan is not a legal document. | askatherapist | acxkoc |
first i would like to say that posting this was hard. i'm afraid to talk to people especially people i do not know. my mom is in the hospital and i feel physically cold, and my emotions i just don't know. i feel this emotion that's huge and heavy, and makes me feel like i want to break down crying. but every time i start feeling this way it gets cut off? like a giant hole opened up swallowing everything leaving me feeling nothing but sick. and it keeps happening over and over like waves. i don't understand this and i don't know what it is or what to do. | i don't understand and i don't know | evl26y | for starters, you need to understand that this is a normal response and something that happens to most people who are going through a really tough time, are grieving a loss, or preparing themselves for a loss. sometimes the stress of a certain situation is just too much for us to process when it happens or our brain shuts down the flood gates of emotions as a survival mechanism because there are things that need to be done before you can have the break downs that you will eventually and need to have. when you hear about the stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance, this is part of the denial part. when most people hear that and think denial they imagine someone literally saying or believing "this isn't happening!". while that does occur sometimes, what's much more common is that the person intellectually understands what's happening, but their emotions shut off. they go numb. in that sense while intellectually they're not in denial, emotionally they are. hopefully this helps you understand somewhat. hopefully knowing that you're not crazy and this is something that happens to almost everyone should ease some of the anxiety. lastly, understand that you do not need to fix this or worry about it while you're still in the middle of this stressful situation. do whatever you need to do to maintain the best level of functioning you can. ask for support and help from friends and family when you need. make sure you're still doing whatever healthy things you do that help relieve stress. it really sucks you're going through this. i hope your mom gets better from whatever she's in the hospital for. | askatherapist | evl26y |
why?! why do i have to be like this. something always happens. everyone i love gets tired of me. i'm always unbearable. i'm always "just fucked up" or "unstable." i go from being loved and being told i'm amazing and sweet and caring to being told i'm basically a monster...in less than 12 hours... all i want is a little compassion or understanding... i don't want to be written off as crazy or fucked up every time i get upset.. i feel like everyone would just be better off without me. the only thing that loves me and doesn't hold anything against me or judge me is my dog, and he's getting old and is going to die. 12 hours ago i had a perfect life and now my boyfriend is telling me he can love me but can't be around me..? i feel like toxic waste. i need to be kept away from anything and everything or else it's a disaster.. i feel so alone and isolated and misunderstood and i just need a hug and to be told that's everything is going to be okay.. | why do i mess everything up | 48y3v0 | i wish i couldn't relate as much as i can. i feel like for me, i need to learn how to manage my emotions better and be careful about not lashing out. i think i have some old habits and patterns of getting my way that don't work anymore. i also feel like my own shifts in mood are hard for me to handle, much less anyone else. i also feel like.. the world generally sees me in a favorable light. i don't tend to see myself that way though, so i read even the smallest criticism as huge, and self-sabotage by picking fights. | bpd | 48y3v0 |
i'm looking for resources for both myself and my fiance. we're in the state of missouri but live right by the kansas state line so while we wouldn't qualify for any sort of locality benefits in kansas, we can still go there for therapy or whatever. we don't have much money at all and no insurance. my fiance has struggled with bad anxiety his entire life but after quitting weed on april 15th he's spiraled in a really bad way. he had a complete paranoid delusional breakdown on may 5th and is in a psychiatric hospital. i'm not sure how long they'll keep him without insurance, but they currently have him on abilify. he had one telehealth appointment with a psychiatrist the morning after he arrived but no therapy or anything since. he's just been taking meds, eating meals, calling me, and sleeping. he told me this morning that he's definitely still paranoid and thinks people are plotting against him, but he's not the crazy person i saw tuesday night (that person was not my fiance, if that makes sense). he seems completely himself aside from this continued paranoia. if you're curious about what happened that night i can go into it, just didn't want to dump that all here unnecessarily. i am just looking for resources for the both of us. i'm stressed to the core and need some kind of support group. he's going to need continued care upon release, i assume, and without money or insurance, i have no idea where to turn. his social worker said they were going to look into getting him medicaid but our states rules on who qualifies for that makes me think he won't qualify. i'm very scared for him to come home because that night was very scary for my whole family but he literally would have nowhere else to go. no family here and only 1 friend but he's married with 3 young children so he's not in a position to take on someone with his issues. he has no diagnosis or release date at this point but i want to be prepared for when he does get released. thanks in advance. | looking for resources. | gfw6eq | this is such a hard situation! i think it is great that you recognize you will both need support. it sounds like you have already been in touch with the hospital social worker . that person can help you with resources whether or not he qualifies for medicaid. practically speaking, the best thing you can do is to keep in touch with that social worker . | askatherapist | gfw6eq |
one of my buddies and i run a youtube channel and he came up with this idea of drinking 24 beers (8 l), as fast as possible. obviously it is a horrible idea and would result in excessive projectile vometing, but is it safe? my main concern is water intoxication. i have seen people hit pretty hard from it during practice and such, and as far as i know it can even be lethal. but in all those cases, the people getting it was pushing their bodies to the limit while drinking huge amounts of water. can you only get water intoxication from drinking pure water without any form of additives, or do you get it from drinking to much liquid in any form? if my physical form means anything for the outcome, i am 192cm / 6ft 3", 80kg / 176 lbs and in pretty good shape. i do not take any kind of medication or drugs. | can i get water intoxication from drinking beer? | 573i2j | your concern is water intoxication? how about severe alcohol intoxication leading to profound medical harm? | askdocs | 573i2j |
a few months ago it came out that my significant other had cheated on me our 2nd month of being together. though this doesn't seem like a significant amount of time, there are other unsavory details attached to the situation that i rather not mention online. when this came to light, he also admitted it happened again after the first incident. i was absolutely blindsided and devastated. besides this being completely crushing, i was also 7 months pregnant at the time of finding this out. after all the crying and apologizing, i decided to try my best to move past this and continue with our relationship, mostly because of three factors: +both incidents were after a night of intense drinking/drugs +they were one night stands, there was no contact afterwards +i didn't want to rob my child the chance to have mom & dad under the same roof before he was even born its been a few months since i decided to forgive (not sure if i have yet) and while the first couple weeks that followed felt somewhat optimistic, i now feel completely doomed, out of love, angry, and depressed. i feel it is inevitable my so will cheat on me again, i keep thinking about him with other women and the nights that lead up to him cheating. he has been coming home everyday afterwork, we are together 24/7, and now we have a newborn that was are co-raising--but i can't shake this very deep hurt that i feel almost constantly. i keep on hanging on to this idea that it will get better, trust will slowly form and we can be happy again, because i think that is what i want. the idea of being alone raising this baby is also extremely terrifying. when do i know its time to move on? i've seriously considered it almost everyday this week but can not seem to let go. we keep having lengthy talks about our relationship and by the end i want to keep at it. but it seems like i need to get over it quickly, or get out now before this ends in completely disaster. any advice? | is there hope for me [22/f] to regain trust of my significant other [28/m] after cheating/lying. | 6qpnul | trust is an abstraction, it's a belief, a belief that someone will do the right thing, a belief that someone will always do what they say they'll do. when trust is broken one of three things can happen. you can slowly regain trust if someone proves to be consistent over time, or you can forgive, which is a kind of leap of faith...or you decide you can't get past it and it's over. the ability to trust, forgive, love....these are all such deeply profound, core aspects of being human. that's why it's so hard to generalize, so hard to create a magic bullet. it's just deeply personal. | relationship_advice | 6qpnul |
the last time i was in a relationship, i was a senior in high school. i had been with my boyfriend for a year and a half. i went to college and for a good portion of my time there, i didn't really look for a relationship, but for the past 2 years i've been actively dating and talking to a number of different guys. there's been a couple of them that i thought i might have a future with, but it never worked out. i'm a college grad now and in this holiday season, about 10 of my friends have announced their engagement. has anyone else been in this situation before? i'm trying to not let it get to me but right now i'm feeling pretty discouraged, and kinda like a freak. | i've been single for going on 5 years. what's wrong with me? [22f] | 5lhyq5 | it's possible you're just more selective than other people, which is a good thing. | relationship_advice | 5lhyq5 |
title. i have no fear going out with a friend, but by myself it feels different. if i want to go to get groceries, i will sometimes wait until my roommate wants to go too. i also order groceries/meals with delivery to avoid going out. (i live in a big city). i also have a fear of running into people i know, and being forced into an impromptu conversation with them. if i have an appointment somewhere, school/work, then i have no problem going out because it feels... justified. also, once i'm already out, i'm more willing to go to additional places by myself. i see this as part motivational issues, part self consciousness, part fear of people. what do you think, reddit? any advice? | i have trouble going out by myself | ch4inj | avoidance tends to increase avoidance. in other words, this might grow bigger if you don't try to break the cycle by doing what you are afraid of. this is called exposure with response prevention and a therapist can help you if doing it alone is too hard. | askatherapist | ch4inj |
i (18f) 135 pounds. 5’3. have the 24 hour release of wellbutrin and i take prozac at the same time, i take them in the morning which i did today. but now it’s 10pm and i don’t know why i took them but it was an accident. should i make myself throw up? along with the antidepressants i also take a multivitamin and fexofenadin (allegra) which i also took with the anti depressants right now. it was impulsive and i didn’t realize i did it after 3 minutes. | took wellbutrin 200mg & fluoxetine 40mg twice by accident, (14 hours apart) what do i do? | fe7mu4 | doubled doses are both within the therapeutic range of those drugs—they’re doses that some people are on intentionally. nothing serious is likely to happen. | askdocs | fe7mu4 |
i know we've discussed stuff like this before, and i'm sorry if this seems unnecessarily redundant. to make a long story shortish: - moved back to my small hometown shortly after quitting drinking - don't hate it here the way i used to, but i'm kind of "over it" and getting ready to move to a city sometime in the next few months - been thinking about the possibility of ""social drinking"" in the future - i know i can't and don't currently want to. i'm going to talk about it to some ppl irl today but i'm "telling on my addict" as they say basically, what i'd love is for some of you to share your stories of meeting new people and being social in sobriety. i've basically restricted myself to family and aa meetings for a social life here and sort of view it as a self-created rehab. i know that moving to a new place when you're not in university or some other "instant social group" situation is daunting for anyone, but in sobriety i have to admit i'm even more nervous. i'm going to be going to meetings in the new city (and actually very excited for the variety and honestly "open-mindedness" of big city recovery which i experienced when i first quit), but i wouldn't mind making friends with people who aren't in recovery, provided they aren't big drinkers. perhaps i'm just complicating things and thinking too much about hypothetical situations in the future - but i'd love to hear your experiences regardless. thanks. | being social / staying sober | 1fq4nt | i'm interested to hear this topic because while i have hung out with my old friends and been around alcohol since getting sober, but in the next 3 months i'll be heading off to texas tech for college this fall. i can tell you that being with my old friends i had to make sure i was able my distance myself enough. i know that once i get back into the same lifestyle i was in drinking will be shortly around the corner. | stopdrinking | 1fq4nt |
i was diagnosed with adhd-pi with anxiety disorder and c-ptsd. i tried wullbetrin xr and didn't really feel there a significant change to my attention and memory. i was advised to try strattera and would like to know why would this drug help where wullbetrin failed? from a pharmacological, physiological and and biological perspective. thank you. | if wullbetrin xr failed to help, why would strattera work? | a2psme | strattera is a selective norepinephrine reuptake inhibitor while wellbutrin is an atypical antidepressant which acts on dopamine. tl;dr: they work on different neurotransmitters. | adhd | a2psme |
i am in a very bad situation (mental health) right now, and i need some advice to fix things. is it okay to go for psychotherapy and seek out advice? | how much helpful is psychotherapy in crucial decision making situations? | dwby3v | therapy can be helpful but you will want to seek out a therapist who uses a solution-focused modality if you are looking for someone to take a more hands on approach to help you "fix things". seeking out advice is not something therapists ethically can dole out constantly. they strive to help give you the tools to make those decisions on your own. a solution-focused approach gives more support in this area compared to other approaches. | mentalhealth | dwby3v |
i just read a post from a guy who says he feels emasculated by someone publicly mocking him for "probably having a small dick" because he's short. it irritates my pussy like you would not believe when people actually hurt the feelings of innocent dudes with the whole "your dick is probably really small" thing. listen. i've been with all kinds. interestingly, and consistently, the guys who have been horrible people to their core have always been the guys with ugly dicks. skinny dicks, crooked dicks, microscopic dicks, dicks that are too huge to even work. i've had incredible sex with "below-average size" dick. it's not the friggin size that makes the sex great. what makes sex great is the person attached to the dick. and ladies, if you're going to make fun of someone's dick, do it in private. a guy knows if his dick is bad. if you are an evil little man, chances are, your dick is bad, and, chances are, the reason you are an evil little man is because you are so, so deeply *bent out of shape* about your repulsive, little dick. anyway i might get hate for my opinion on this, but to that guy who posted who was sad about those dumb girls, here's a *tip*. try romancing your date to the point where she won't even be clued in on the "little" issue. for instance, take her out or make dinner together, watch a romantic comedy, give her a little gift, and **make out in low light or candle light.** if it's dark enough, she won't even know how big or small it is, and once she's hooked on what you've got to offer, when she sees it later in the bright light of day she might even be shocked at what you can do with what you've got. good luck, dude! | (nsfw) gonna set the record straight on the whole "dick size" debate. | 2u5z1c | i didn't know my dude had a small dick until he self-consciously brought it up. it's not like we're down there with measuring tapes! just ♩ ♪ ♫ ♬ let it gooooooo ♩ ♪ ♫ ♬ . | offmychest | 2u5z1c |
when i talk to someone i'm not comfortable with, i'm never sure if they actually want me to stay around or not. so any time there's a silence, the first thing i think about is what i'm going to say to excuse myself. a lot of times the conversations will go like this.. *conversation dies down momentarily for a couple seconds and i can't think of anything to say...* me: alright well it was nice seeing you *and i'm starting to turn away while saying this* them: "blah blah blah" *interrupting me mid sentence because they actually still had something to say* so it's awkward because they clearly didn't think the conversation was over yet, but i made it clear that i wanted the conversation to end.. so what do i do when there's a silence? i feel so weird just staring them in the eyes. where should my eyes be looking at? and what should my head be thinking? i don't want to just linger around when the conversation is dead, but i also don't want to seem distant and not want to talk to anyone for longer than a couple minutes. | need conversation tips to not be awkward... | zuo2r | this [guide to conversation](WEBLINK) is just what the doctor ordered :) | socialskills | zuo2r |
i've been through hard times before (divorce with wife of 12 years), but for some reason i am having a really hard time with getting over my exgf. i've been no contact for the most part for a month, i workout, try to spend time with friends, i have a lot of hobbies. but even doing all that i just think about her. i need to find a way to get her out of my head. we work in the same office, so i do see her occasionally walking by my office (which doesn't help). tl;dr: broken heart from a break up and need advice, someone to talk to about my situation. | me [35 m] with my ex-gf [33 f] 2 years, advice dealing with the anxiety/loss of a breakup | 68nm5v | cold turkey is best, but your situation prevents it. try to avoid as much as possible. you're doing all the right things. | relationship_advice | 68nm5v |
ok, this is my first real time i'm actually thinking of stopping drinking, i went out last night, blacked out and i don't really remember getting home. but its more to do with the morning, every time i'm hungover i start freaking out. but today was easily the worst panic attacks i've experienced. i haven't gone to the doctors about any of this and i know i should get some help, i just cant get myself through the door to say i might have a mental problem. i really need some advice for all of this, i'm quite literally losing myself | think it might be time to stop | 3xu2km | go see a therapist! plenty of drug counselors out there would love to talk to you, and help you through this. | mentalhealth | 3xu2km |
i do not have a therapist at present who i can consult for their wisdom. i (23f) was diagnosed with anorexia nervosa last year. i live with my parents because that's the norm here. over the year i fasted, restricted, purged and chew and spat; all these behaviours were witnessed by my sister. she has herself been told multiple times that she is fat/will get fat by my mom. my mom also compares our sizes all the time, even though she is in normal body weight percentile. my sister idolises my size. i don't want her to develop any body image issues. she is a perfectionist too, so that leads her to think stuff like: "i wish my tummy was flat. even if no one will look at it, i just want it to be flat for my satisfaction." i know that my attempt last year and all this anorexia stuff puts her under a lot of emotional stress. she tries to feed me. she won't eat until i take a few bites. i want to explain to her that this is not just a "diet". i want to tell her where this comes from (a low will to live). but i don't want to trigger anything in her or lead her down this path. would it be right to discuss this with her? or is she too young/vulnerable? she is exceptionally mature though. i don't know what would be right for her mental health. | would it be appropriate to discuss my eating disorder with my 13 yr old sister? | faytqc | since she can already tell something is going on, it seems reasonable to open about it. secrets and lies tend to create bigger problems. i would caution you to be very , very careful to be certain that she is never put in the position of big sister or caretaker. you want to strike a careful balance so that she is not burdened by your problems. i know you would not do this on purpose, but kids can take on adult problems even when nobody intends for that to happen. are you able to get back into therapy? that may help you balance this with your sister and be a good example for self care . | askatherapist | faytqc |
whenever i'm outside, at work or surrounded by people in general i tend to sweat quite a lot due to how nervous i feel. is there anyone who knows how lessen it? it is very noticeable and makes me even more nervous when it starts to happen. | how do i sweat less when in social situations? | 4mwrvy | talk to a therapist -- they can help treat the anxiety, which will help you sweat less. | socialskills | 4mwrvy |
i am so scared about making a phone call and i need to do so. i think that i need to practice more. i delayed this several hours. so scared. | i am about to call back a job. i am scared. i think if i practice the phone call it will go ok. | 7yy45o | despite being a therapist, an extrovert, and an overall people-person, i get a great deal of "phone anxiety". i think it has to do with not being able to read people's non-verbals. what helps me is to come up with a basic script. write it down, practice it. jot down a few questions you may want to ask as well and just a few possible answers to questions they may ask you. you will have to improvise some as it never generally happens that they follow your script exactly, but it can be helpful to have some words on paper in front of you just in case you need them. my guess is once you get talking and get over the initial anxiety hump, you probably won't need them. best of luck! [-the web shrink](WEBLINK) | socialanxiety | 7yy45o |
hey /askdocs/, this is my first post, but i need some advice or at least someone who has experience with this matter and is able to comfort me. first the mandatory stuff: age: 25 sex: male height: 183cm weight: 80kg race: white duration of complaint: 10 years location: europe working as a software developer, sitting 8-12 hours a day. i currently have a strange pressure at the end of my colon behind my sphincter. it feels as if i have to go to the toilet all the time. when i do so, i am able to do my buisness normally, but afterwards the feeling stays. this is no congestion, since i am able to poop fairly normally. the only difference is the color and shape of the result. my doctor told me to eat fiber-rich and drink much water and it will eventuelly go away. i doubt it though, because since about 10 years none of my health problems ever vanished. skip this part, if you are not interested in my past: ----> when i was about 15 years old, i was overweight (about 100kg), and one day my right knee startet to hurt while walking. i never went to the doctor with it, and aceptet it as a given state, after some time. this is still present up until today. shortly after, i started feeling dizzy several hours around the day. my doctor said, it was normal due to my fast growth as a teenager. i even remember feeling "slower" and getting worse at school because of it. i accepted it, and the dizzyness sooner or later went away, but what stayed was a visibly larger right iris (right eye), which is also the eye where i have a lazy eyelid ever since. i accepted it. since i am 19 years old, i started doing sports and loosing weight, up until the middle of last year where i was at 75kg. since about 4 years now, i have a pressure under my last right costal arch. this pressure becomes stronger and weaker over time, but never fully healed since then. some nights, i can't even sleep because of it. it is no pain, but it feels as if something inside my stomach expands and pushes against my guts. sometimes it is unbearable and i start twist and coil like a worm, when i am in bed. of course i have been to the doctor with it. my blood was tested, a colonoscopy was done, a gastroscopy was done and eventually a medical ultrasound was done too, and nothing was found. because i continued going to my doctor, she eventually sent me to psychotherapy, which i did for about 9 months and then stopped, because it did not change anything. the pressure stayed. at the same time, my doctor sent me to an orthopaedist, who diagnosed a curvature of my spine and a light version of the scheuermann's disease. since then, my right arm started to hurt, and my right shoulder is burning as if inflamed. anti-inflammatory meds are not helping. since one year i had to stop jogging, because my right foot started to hurt, so i went to my orthopaedist who diagnosed an inflammation of the dorsal flexor, which never healed since then. today, i am 25, have an inflammation in my foot, that won't go away, my shoulders and right arm are constantly hurting and crack when moving, and the pressure inside my stomach (on the right side) is keeping me awake some days, and sometimes weeks. i tried everything. i paused sports for nearly a year (orthopaedist told so), and took my meds and nothing changed. i changed my diet, because i thought the pressure in my stomach maybe has something to do with it. i stopped drinking alcohol (not even on family celebrations). i stopped smoking weed (which was the only kind of smoking i did 3-5 times a year). and i started telling myself, that everything just has to do something with the curvature of my spine. the fact that all of my problems are on the right side only, has to do something with my spine, right? some pinched nerve maybe? i said to myself: it also has something to do with your job. maybe you should get a job where you have to move and do physical work. you never moved durning your whole youth, and now your body is paying it back with all this!? ----> since 2 weeks, i am dealing with the pressure at the end of my colon. i had some sort of meltdown yesterday, where i called my best buddy and cried in his arms all night long, because i am sure i am going to die (i feel embarrassed today). i am 25, and i feel like 50. my body has several malfunctions, and whatever new problem comes along, it won't go away. they never do. i am sure, i will have to live with the colon-pressure feeling along with all the other problems, like i always did. i keep telling myself, that everything is fine, and that i am overreacting, and that i maybe just need to make a move and quit my job. i am afraid to go to the doctor again. she already thinks i am mental, and my other doctors never found a thing. what is going on? sometimes i tell myself, that they overlooked something! they overlooked some serious problem that startet 10 years ago and gets worse since then. i have a job, i have money, i am (for the first time in my life) decent looking, because i lost weight, i am ready do live a good life, but i feel like dying. sure this is melodramatic, but i am not sure what to do anymore. can someone please help me? | is my slow long term decline of health resulting in hypochondria, or should i investigate further? | 6rxye9 | i dont see anything from your story that would set off alarm bells regarding a more sinister diagnosis. your docs are the ones that have actually laid hands on you, and if they can't find anything, its probably nothing too worrying. i note that your joint/muscle problems only started after seeing an orthopaedic specialist (?) who diagnosed you with spinal issues - which might show how anxiety affects your physical health. | askdocs | 6rxye9 |
i am wondering if anyone has any advice on howcome i have troubles saying to my girlfriend that she is beautiful and being affectionate and emotional, and i find i joke around more than i am serious. but when i am in a fight to save our relationship i have no issues. we just broke up today and i told how head over heals i was for her how incredible of a human being she is and i was pouring my heart into her. but if things were to be normal again. i would typically revert back to being funny and not so serious and less emotional. i hate that i do it but i for some reason just dont say those things when things are good. if i were to have said those things when things were good, i bet i would not have been in this situation. | howcome me [27/m] am unable to be sensitive, serious and emotional with my [24/f] gf until i am fighting to save my relationship? | 5sielx | i like to think of emotional expressiveness as a skill set, not unlike any other kind of skill. in other words if you were a guitar player, and undisciplined, you might play your guitar a lot but you really would just be fooling around with it in a casual sort of way. but maybe some sort of performance opportunity might come along, and you would buckle down in a disciplined way to prepare for it. it's the same thing. you make an intellectual decision to do something, be it practicing your guitar seriously or telling your girlfriend how much you love her, then you practice doing it in a disciplined kind of way. | relationship_advice | 5sielx |
i'm laying on the couch right now with my roommates' cat after a bad episode. i'm sorry if this gets too graphic, i'm just feeling really sick and disgusted with myself and don't know who to talk to.. about thirty minutes ago, i was going to the bathroom when i realized i had an ingrown pubic hair. i started just picking at it mindlessly before realizing it was really deep, so, still seated on the toilet seat, i grabbed tweezers and went to work to pull it out. the thing was it was so deep, the tweezers weren't getting it. so after i finished using the loo (and washed my hands because i'm not that much of a heathen), i went into my room and grabbed my swiss army knife. i used both the scissors and knife to gauge a hole around the hair, but the blood still made it difficult to get out because it was too slippery. fifteen minutes later, i was still in the bathroom forcing tweezers and any sharp objects into my pubic area to get the hair out. i don't know why it was so difficult. i just kept getting more nauseous, like it was a parasite or something that i just needed to get out now. i did, but now i'm stuck with this gaping, bleeding hole in (on?) my vulva from where i dug, and i'm so ashamed and disgusted by myself. i haven't had a picking episode this bad in a long time where i've physically gotten a knife out to maim myself. normally, it's just my fingernails. it really scared myself that i couldn't stop. i'm not even sure who i can tell or what to say. when i try to tell people i have dermatillomania, or a skin picking disorder, they often say something like, "oh yeah, i like to pop pimples and pick scabs too" and that's fine, but what happened just now isn't a normal scab or pimple. it was literally a compulsion to cut away a perceived deformity and that terrifies me. what if it gets worse? what if i end up maiming a body part or really injuring myself because i can't fight this compulsion? what do you all think? | mortified and disgusted after a bad episode.. | 9l50v8 | first of all, thank you for being open and brave enough to share this. i know it’s been incredibly hard to go through and putting the post out there was probably no walk in the park either. you sharing your experience helps other people on this sub. next, it sounds like from your post that csp is something you’ve experienced for awhile and you’ve had some better and worse times with it. it’s normal to have relapses with any kind of behavior you’re trying to change, so be kind to yourself about this slip up. we’re human and it happens! i also want to acknowledge though that it seems like this incident represents a significant struggle for you and if i’m hearing you right, it’s somewhat frightening/bewildering to go through. to that end, if you’re able to seek therapy, it can be really helpful in helping you understand what’s happening and stop the behavior more successfully. i’m not sure if you’ve gotten this advice before, but cbt (cognitive behavioral therapy) is a well-supported intervention for stuff like this. a lot of therapists these days are familiar with cbt as it’s pretty darn popular, but you may want to find someone who advertises that as one of their specialty areas. finally, i want to address your fear about the compulsion getting worse and you ending up maiming yourself. while your safety is definitely an important thing to be mindful of, it’s actually pretty low probability that you’ll end up doing something to seriously harm yourself. typically, the thing you’re afraid of doing, you won’t actually do. | compulsiveskinpicking | 9l50v8 |
let me preface by saying i've tried straterra, adderall xr & ir, welbutrin to all help focus on adhd. vyvanse has been my savior. this past month has been amazing, focus on point i can feel my anxiety diminish as i am concentrating a lot better, and able to control my emotions a lot better. recently i've noticed the 'kick' or what i describe as the 'wow' factor where you feel like superman, sort of diminsh and not last as long. i've noticed when taking it at 830am about 4 'wearing off' and i get extremely irritable and snapping at my wife. questions: is this common? how do i combat it? would taking adderal 10mg ir help? are there other supplements or foods i could eat that could possibly help? thank you for your responses and input. | vyvanse 40mg has been amazing so far, but i feel the 'wow' factor is diminishing. | 2bless | the euphoria naturally goes away. it is a side effect, not the main purpose of the meds. my meds (adderall xr) start wearing off around 3:30. on the days i feel it crashing or i feel down as it weans off, i drink a (small) red bull to help smooth it out. | adhd | 2bless |
i used to be good at it. but ever since my social anxiety kicked in, i've gotten worse and worse at it. even shit like saying here when roll is called gets me a little anxious sometimes. i have to present a small power point about myself in spanish class. i am freaking out about it. especially since school has just started and i am not comfortable with my class at all. fuck, help. | anyone else suck at speaking in front of people? | 6vvnoz | i have always had a weird relationship with my social anxiety. i have a ton but i also am a bit of an adrenaline junkie. i've performed music on stage more times than i can count and if it's been a little while, getting up there makes me feel like my skeleton is going to jump out of my skin. thankfully it hasn't yet. i think one of the main things that adds to social anxiety is forgetting that what you see and are aware of within yourself is not at all what the others see. for instance, when i play a song, i know exactly how i want it to sound down to every chord and every sung note. if it's a little off, i get upset. i also get upset that everyone else can see exactly how nervous i am. in reality, they have no idea. it's taken me a very long time of people telling me they're "shocked to even hear i have such high social anxiety because it doesn't show" to believe they're telling the truth. the take away, nobody out there knows you're nervous unless you say it during the presentation or continuously apologize for any miniscule mistake you might make (that nobody probably would've even noticed if you don't bring attention to it). practice your presentation. practice presenting it in a few different ways as when your nerves kick in, it might be an incredible presentation, but not the one exact way you pictured it in your mind. that's okay! you'll power through it. honestly, when it comes to school, most people are scared to death to get up in front of people and give a presentation. almost everyone feels some sense of panic and think everyone can see it, when most people can't. best of luck! [-the web shrink](WEBLINK) | socialanxiety | 6vvnoz |
have any of you ever done something really bad that really hurt people that you love with your entire heart? due to impulsivity, or being selfish, or not considering their emotions enough, or whatever reason? or have you ever just done anything you regret (due to parts of your personality that you maybe weren't able to control at the time)? do you have any advice? i'm completely, absolutely falling apart right now and i feel more alone than ever. &#x200b; edit: everybody, thank you so much for sharing your stories and words of advice/support. this is such a wonderful community. we all make mistakes but all we can do is learn from them and grow. if other people aren't willing to accept that then its time for the both of you to move on. hugs to all<3 | hurting people that you love | b43924 | yep. advice? learn from it and try your hardest never to do it again. i cheated on my now husband for the first few years of our relationship. he has always seen the good in me and he stuck around. he's always known i'm extremely remorseful but still got so hurt. i moved states with him 7 years ago and swore i would never do anything like that again. i made an effort to not make friends with men for the first three years i was here. probably missed some great friendships but not worth my marriage. i worked on my impulsivity in that area for those three years. i'm still not close to many men and if i am it's all guys i know i can trust. not that i don't trust myself because i would never ever again do that as it's not worth everything it causes, but just because i now see how weird it is and how it must make him feel. i'm happier now than i ever have been in my relationship even though other stuff is going on. so yeah. try to learn what it was that hurt someone and figure out how to prevent that action happening again. spending time with men didn't hurt my husband, cheating on him did, and avoiding men for a time is what stopped me doing that. | adhd | b43924 |
greetings friends. i have been listening to various guided mediations as i tuck in for bed at night, and one has stood out pretty profoundly for me: loving kindness. it starts with the woman guiding it (sharon salzberg in this case) saying, "and with lovingkindess, we start with ourselves, because we are just as worthy of kindness and compassion as any other person or being we may encounter." the first time i heard this i spontaneously combusted into tears. i have spent so much of my life beating and berating and belittling myself, feeling a deep sense of shame about who i am, what i did or didn't do, and just overall super rock bottom self-esteem. thus far, in my drinking life, i really hadn't thought i was "just as worthy" as anyone else. i believed i was not, and this is why i drank for the most part, i think. but i keep pushing past the discomfort at those words. i repeat the silent mantra in my head anyway: may i be safe. may i be happy. may i be healthy. may i live with ease. it is astounding what happened to me when i did this. i felt something break open in me, almost physically. and little by little this belief that i *do* deserve kindness and compassion has seeped in to my everyday life, making me feel exponentially more compassionate to those i see around me, visibly in pain or not. if all that quitting drinking does for me is this, it will be enough. more than enough. because it enables me to genuinely and openly say to you, and even to those i have difficulty getting along with, may you be safe. may you be happy. may you be healthy. may you live with ease. i wish all my fellow sobernauts a beautiful thursday. thanks for being here. | lovingkindness meditation is a revelation and it's saving me lately | 8grme2 | ive tried loving kindness too and think its great. there is something so softening and heart opening about it. well done and good luck to all🎉 | stopdrinking | 8grme2 |
my wife is the victim of childhood sexual abuse. we have been living in the same neighborhood that she grew up in, her parents live a couple blocks away and they live in the same house she was abused in. our daughter recently turned 5 which is the age it started. we recently have been going to a playground she used to play at when she was the age she started being abused. we've talked at length about it, i've listened and would gladly move if it would be a benefit to her and her healing. we are seeking a qualified counselor for her but right now we are wondering from a professional standpoint if it would be more beneficial to stay during her counseling or if it would be better to remove as many triggering aspects as possible. thank you | from a professional standpoint is it better to move away from triggers? | b8n9i1 | this is a great question. creating distance or cutoff from something triggering (people or place) is evidence of a problem, fixes a problem, and perpetuates the same problem. i, as a therapist, am of two minds about it: 1) moving away to not have to see the triggers is likely to make things easier; 2) making things easier does not mean things are "better" or "healed", it allows the painful feelings to not be felt, rather than resolved. maybe there is a middle-ground, of avoiding the playground until your wife has improved enough that she can confront and deal with some of the really difficult things that are brought up by the triggers. ultimately, i am of the belief we all need to face our fears and our triggers and it is through that we are able to find healing. however, there are valid reasons to not do this. | askatherapist | b8n9i1 |
i require constant intellectual stimulation. even if i'm drunk at a party or a bar, i'll still attempt to impose something intellectual onto the situation. i'll watch the crowds and analyze the social dynamics, i'll study the moves of the good dancers, i'll pair off with the other wallflowers and talk about science and philosophy. apparently, i don't know how to just chill out and have a good time, and as a result, i'm kind of boring and dry, which of course doesn't get me invited out. at all. this sucks. i'm kind of tired of being an observer, i want to be a participant every once in a while too. i want to be able to cut loose and have some "so i was drinking with friends" stories that don't involve me making a complete and utter fool out of myself, like the ones that i do have. and for what it's worth, i think the events in those stories have kind of scared me off from relaxing while drinking, at least while in company. i did some insanely stupid things, and now i'm *very* observant about how much i drink, who i'm drinking with, where i'm drinking, and in order to keep from going full retard again, i try to keep myself functioning on a higher level. it's not just in party situations though. it's all the time. basically, i can't relax intellectually. i'm always analyzing, dissecting, and rationalizing, and i want to stop. so how do i do that? | my overactive intelligence makes me a total buzzkill. how do i just relax? | xdooo | um. maybe try something physical that puts you in a "flow" state where you're really really focused on being in the moment? something like yoga or dancing or martial arts. | socialskills | xdooo |
hey, i'm a nurse. i had a doctor give me a prn order for sc gravol. (dimenhyrdinate 50mg po/sc q4h prn) i've never seen it ordered sc before, so i looked it up and couldn't find anything saying that was a route it could be given. i always see im or iv are parenteral routes. my question is: is this is a legitimate way to give this drug? and why wouldn't it be? my thought is no, and it wouldn't because it would probably be painful sc(seeing as it has to be diluted iv). so let me know. | subcutaneous dimenhydrinate? | 8jizfh | that sounds likely to be an ordering error. ask the doctor! | askdocs | 8jizfh |
i’m feeling personally defeated after a primarily negative interaction with an online psychologist. he is one of the founders of a website, which i found on quora, after reading so many positive reviews. i spoke with him a total of five times, with very limited communication between ‘sessions.’ i was disappointed because other reviewers had said how warm and communicative this person was through written messages, and most of his replies to me had consisted of simply, “okay.” i did not find him in be incompetent in any way, just seemingly lacking in personal interest towards me. after a drop off in communication that lasted over a week, i became a bit bitter. i left a largely negative review of his company on quora. i stated that while he seemed capable, intelligent and ambitious, he seemed to lack general empathy towards me. there were various small things that occurred that bothered me (i.e. him not seeming to care that my puppy was mauled in front of me and lost a leg, or not bothering to write ‘good luck’ when i told him i was having a medical procedure). anyways, i suppose it was my disgruntled way of expressing my anger towards my perceived lack of his caring (which i still believe to be the case). a few days later, he wrote me a message detailing, point by point, why he was unable to contact me. firstly, that his uncle was in the hospital, and secondly he claimed, as he was reading my last text and was unable to respond, as he was, at that very moment, given the news that his cousin had died. these chats were on whatsapp and i could see that there were many times he was online during the following week these events occurred. i’m fairly certain that he lied in order to illicit sympathy and get me to remove my negative review. i don’t think he’s lying about his personal issues, but that he found out about this situation, at that exact moment, seems incredibly suspect. i really don’t like conflict and i was extremely surprised he texted me again. i wrote him an apology explaining that his lack of communication made me feel like he had no sympathy for my personal situation. i also wrote that i finally decided therapy is not for me, as it places undue expectations on a person who is just going through their own problems, like everyone else, to be too much to too many people. he said he could see my perspective and added some sappy, saccharine phrase like, “i hope your life shines brightly like a star,” or some such shit. i suppose my question is, isn’t it a therapist’s responsibility to tell a client when there is something going on in their personal lives? is it appropriate to just put it all on me? i also feel strongly that he would have never contacted me again had he not seen that negative review. in the review, i knew it was very clear that he would realize it was me that was writing it, and though i didn’t mention him by name, i did mention he was a co-founder of the company. in the end, this whole venture just seems like a total loss, very depressing, and now i also feel like i was in the wrong and a bad person. this is the first time i’ve posted to this subreddit, so i appreciate the response! | embarrassing situation with an online psychologist, need advice.... | f7ts5k | i'm curious about the boundaries related to time. did you have set sessions during which you were scheduled to communicate ? or did you text him as you felt like it and wait for a response? i think the understanding about when a response is expected is important here . if you arranged a time to communicate , it is definitely the therapist 's responsibility to not abandon a client. even in an emergency , most jurisdictions require a designated person to contact clients. if there was no communication timeline agreement, it gets a little sticky . | askatherapist | f7ts5k |
hi. i don't know what to do. i'm a 20yr/o female traveling solo and i am staying in a hostel tonight. there are shared bathrooms between genders which is common here. i was getting ready to shower and thought i saw a phone. figured i must have been seeing things so i stood there in disbelief. saw the phone peak over the stall again. i still had my tshirt and undies on, and firmly told them to stop but i don't know what to do. i have no idea who it was or how to go about the situation. i put my pants back on and walked to my room and locked the door. any advice is welcome. | almost naked picture taken of me without consent | 6n0qpm | where are you staying? there might still be some use in speaking to the authorities depending on the situation. | needadvice | 6n0qpm |
we were in the same town for a year and since then we have an ldr, because we went studying and ,after that,working on different cities, but we kept loving each other and keeping the promess that we will be always together and geting married, we saw each other every weekend all this time all this 8 years he treated me nicely like a gentelman , he has nervosity probelm but once he gets calm he apologises and promess that he wont do it again well, two years ago he met with this friend who introduced him to a concept of having affairs. so he started cheating, i caught him the first time, he had a broken heart and he apologised and i forgave him but unfortunately he kept cheating on me, and i wasn't sure about hus cheating till recently so now i'm in a dilemma, he's young and compared to his young age, men have affairs and have fun but he showed a level of maturity bigger than other men in his age, so i know someday he wont cheat again because he will get satistfied of that lack of experiences, he treated me like a gentelman, took care of me never left me wash the dishes when we spend time together, he takes care of everything when we go on dates in his personality he's the man, he takes care of everything he' responsible but he is dry emotionaly we are planing to get married in july but he cheated on me two months ago, how can you understand it? well, he considers marriage very serious bond, but now plays since he thinks that i dont know about his affairs so am i making the right decision by breaking up with him? | am i making the right decision by breaking up with my[29f] boyfriend[28m] because of him cheating on me, despite the fact that he kept treating me like a princess for the past 8 years of our relationship? | 69kg67 | trust is an abstraction, it's a belief, a belief that someone will do the right thing, a belief that someone will always do what they say they'll do. when trust is broken one of three things can happen. you can slowly regain trust if someone proves to be consistent over time, or you can forgive, which is a kind of leap of faith...or you decide you can't get past it and it's over. the ability to trust, forgive, love....these are all such deeply profound, core aspects of being human. that's why it's so hard to generalize, so hard to create a magic bullet. it's just deeply personal. | relationship_advice | 69kg67 |
(update) WEBLINK i don't post at all or even comment often but i have been a part of the community for years and made an account less than a year ago. i am not even sure if i have enough karma for me to post this and it not be taken down. i am really hoping it will stay and i can get some advice. also i am sorry if this is long. i am just beside myself right now and really need to get this out and get any advice i can. i thank everyone in advance for any help you give today. basically as the title says my son is 11 and high functioning autistic. i am a single mother and have always done everything i possibly can to help him succeed in life. i have always worried if this day would come due to him being diffirent and what i could do to help him if it did come. welp, he told me over the weekend he was being bullied for the last 3 months of the school year last year, to the point he was being assaulted daily. i just got off the phone with the middle school and was a bit disappointed with the response. it seems their main way to handle this is to try to seperate the boys who pick on him by just scheduling seperate classes from him. they said because of the length of time since the bullying they may not be able to reprimand them at all but they will talk to them. i see them being spoken to by the school without consequences as a means for them to retaliate and get even worse with my son. he is more scared of that than anything which is partly why he waited so long to say anything(due to his autism he has a hard time communicating to begin with). he does not want it to get worse and is scared it will now that they will know he told on them and i agree with him. i know it is several months after the bullying but i want those kids to be reprimanded. i want to be able to pursue whatever i can to get these boys punished to help deter them from continuing this and let them know they will have consequences if they continue. if i can get the police involved i will. honestly if i could i would beat their little asses. i won't but i wish i could. they made my sons life a living hell for 3 months to the point i put him in counseling because he was getting so anxious, self loathing and depressed(of course i did not know then that this bullying was going on). it isn't just 3 months for him either this continues on for him. he hates himself now and his confidence is just gone. he is scared to go back to school which is why he finally decided to tell me. i am absolutely livid and scared and feel powerless to help my son. i am so angry at myself and filled with so much sorrow at the thought that he was dealing with this alone. i failed him and will be damned if i continue to fail him. there are 3 boys. the first one (he doesn't know this boy's last name)punches him in the arms over and over again literally daily, he doesn't talk to him just hits him. my son had come home with bruises all over his arms several times last year and when asked about it he would refuse to talk about it. he can be pretty active and clumsy so i was a little concerned about it but he gets a new bruise almost everyday so i didn't think much of it. it was not something i thought could be caused by abuse at the time. i so deeply regret not pushing harder about it and pursuing it more. the second boy(my son knows his full name) daily called him gay, a homo and a fag because my son has long hair, he calls him a girl and gay because of it. my son does not get his hair cut because of his autistic sensory issues, he cannot stand it at all. the third boy(his name is known too) threatens my boy. he aggressively tells him not to look at him, not to talk to him. he threatens violence if he does. all 3 of them are friends, egg each other on and gang up on him together. all of this stuff was happening in class. not the halls, not the cafeteria, not after school. these little shits were doing this right under the teachers noses when their backs were turned. so i am not exactly confident in the schools ability to protect my son. i want to make sure i do everything i can to protect him and put a stop to it. all this being said i absolutely appreciate any advice that is given. i need advice about what i can do to help my son cope with this emotionally at home(he is still in counseling). what he could try to do when the bullying is happening. advice about how i should handle it with the school. advice about if i can get police involved in this or not. as i said, just incase this info is needed, my son is high functioning autistic. he has had all the treatment and therapy i could get for him for his autism and no longer is in any. he does not have an iep or anything like it. he excels academically and now his main struggles are sensory, social and fine motor skills. he doesn't qualify for assistance or therapies as he is not "disabled enough". tl;dr: high functioning autistic son being bullied at school. how can i help him and pursue safety for him at school and consequences for these little shits? also sorry for any errors i am a bit of a mess right now. edit: just want to say thank you to everyone for all of the support, advice and responses. got a lot of information to take in now. this is such a wonderful community and you all are amazing. thank you for the award as well. trying to respond to everyone as much as i can but lots of stuff going on right now. i will type at least helped! to everyone who helped or responded. i will also update as soon as i can. thanks again! | my 11 year old autistic son is being bullied in middle school. he is being physically assaulted and i don't know what the best actions to take are. what can i do to help him? | cvrj92 | the other answers are really great. i would like to just add - is it at all possible to change schools? i know it might seem like "letting them win" but at the end of the day - your child deserves a better environment than that, and it might take a while for that particular school to clean up their ways. | advice | cvrj92 |
required info: 23 female 5'6 130 lb caucasian, western us non-smoker medical history: pmdd, iga vasculitis current medical problem: have been feeling increasingly bad and weird for past 3 weeks. doc yesterday believes i have serotonin syndrome based on my sx. current meds: birth control (oral), lisinopril for kidneys, was on effexor 175 until yesterday. was also rx clonazepam 0.5 prn for withdrawal symptoms. issue: so, my doc thinks i have serotonin syndrome. that is a kind of a long story to explain all the sx and what led up to this but i am so grateful he caught it because i had been feeling honestly awful and strange and was not sure what was wrong with me. he recommended i stop effexor cold turkey as ss can be very dangerous if not treated. but here's the thing. i already get awful w/ds if i don't take my effexor on time every morning. i tried to wean off of it once and even that was so unbearable i couldn't do it. but i agreed because my life is obviously more important than a little discomfort. but, i admit i did turn to dr. google to read about the w/ds and what to expect, how long, etc. i was a little terrified when i read *three weeks* for how long they can last. i have a life to live! but okay, i can handle it. however, some legit-seeming websites said that it should never be discontinued cold turkey because it can lead to really serious medical problems and even death. wtf?!?! is this legitimate? do i need to wean off of it, even if i do have serotonin syndrome (which i do believe based on my doc's description & my own preexisting knowledge of it; i never would have guessed but it makes sense)? how do i prevent serious withdrawal symptoms? i can handle feeling kind of crappy, but i don't want to fuck myself over and, you know, die. thanks!! | being treated for serotonin syndrome. have to d/c effexor cold turkey. worried about withdrawal symptoms; how serious are they and what can i do? | cn6lb2 | effexor withdrawal is unpleasant but not dangerous. there aren’t very definite symptoms. you skipped over it but i’m curious. serotonin syndrome is serious and acute, not chronic. what were the signs and symptoms that led to that diagnosis? | askdocs | cn6lb2 |
# let's celebrate our victories adhd is a daily challenge. sometimes it's hard to remember the positive and it can feel like things are rarely good. **we win every single day.** we challenge you to write down your wins and see if you feel better looking at the list later in the week. don’t worry if you miss a day or two or three! do what you can. even writing them down one day is a win. --- > one thing that comes out in myths is that at the bottom of the abyss comes the voice of salvation. the black moment is the moment when the real message of transformation is going to come. at the darkest moment comes the light. > — *joseph campbell, the power of myth* --- **examples from previous weeks:** * abstaining from binge drinking for 11 days. keep it up! * worked to overcome their traumatic brain injury and had an awesome week. * i successfully adulted today. * i just got through 2 weeks of studying and finals and i did pretty good! * this weekend i was diagnosed with add, and people keep telling me they're sorry -- but i'm ecstatic! * i just finished my bachelors degree. --- ##### we love you, /r/adhd! be proud and celebrate with each other! — your community managers (and /u/blynng) **don't forget to join our other exciting weekly threads on [fridays](WEBLINK) and [sundays](WEBLINK)!** | win wednesday | aq5xed | i was told today that i will pass placement in three weeks. i'm redoing it because of my adhd but this time i smashed both it and the adhd ;) | adhd | aq5xed |
i got enough downvotes to understand the general opinion. i've decided saying nothing is better than saying something. no ones gotta know, right? i'll just be as bi as i've always been and no concerns. thanks for the help. i'm a piece of shit for feelings that i can't control and make me cry at night 👍 | i (20/f) recently realized i'm a lesbian... but i have a child and a fiancé (23/m). | 5mt9m9 | have to be true to yourself. hopefully you and your bf can transition to best friends and great co-parents | relationship_advice | 5mt9m9 |
just posting for accountability. i got upgraded to business class for my trip to france, and am sitting in a lovely lounge with plenty of free, quality wine. but i’m drinking club soda. i know this routine - the first glass of wine is heavenly, the second slows me down, and by the third (and in the past i would have consumed at least that by now) i’m headache-y, red in the face and feeling slow and stupid. but not today. i won’t deny i’m tempted, and that the first sip would taste like fucking magic. but when i play that tape forward, it doesn’t stay cheerful, and the magical inebriated feeling will have turned into shame. yes, sometimes i feel like it’s sad that i can’t drink. but this will pass. today i choose not to drink. today i’m clear-headed and about to fly without feeling horrible when i land. and tomorrow i will feel so proud. i’ve never regretted not drinking. thanks for listening. just needed to feel my sd pals around me today. | the ol’ airport lounge story | 9ka0j4 | *tips hat good for you pal :) | stopdrinking | 9ka0j4 |
something of a random thought, but i’m genuinely interested in what a therapist’s reaction would be. | what would you do if a client suddenly got overwhelmed from the questions and asks to stop asking questions? | f66kvl | outside of an intake, most therapy does not involve many questions . the client talks , i listen. i can think of 2 clients who said they felt uncomfortable initiating conversations and they asked me specifically to ask questions , so i did. of course , anyone who feels overwhelmed can stop anytime . in online settings like this , there are lots of questions because we can't listen very well and only get a small idea of what is happening. questions often make people feel on the spot . many therapists use reflections instead. "that sounds ..." i may ask "what was that like for you?" but otherwise , i am more apt to make statements instead of questions . "tell me more about ..." "i'm curious about ..." | askatherapist | f66kvl |
i am posting my current situation in this sub now because i see that there is much more activity here than in the r/marriage sub and i'd love as much feedback as possible to my current situation. if i'm wrong in doing so, mods please delete, redirect, or whatever and i am perfectly fine with that as i am a brand new redditer (who read the faq, but may have missed something). i'm married and posted in r/marriage a few days ago about having been what i (and some others) considered to be, raped while i was unconscious by my husband over the course of many months. WEBLINK because of these incidences, and after thinking on it as i have, i am now 98% sure i want to divorce but there are some sticking points that are making it very difficult for me to really pull the trigger and move out. i have a 13 year old step-son and my moving out would mean we would have to sell the house (husband can't afford it on his own) which would mean everyone moves and the teenager's life is disrupted. i hate that thought. also we are good business partners in the sense that we have a rental property that we own and manage together and through which we derive a good amount of rental income that neither of us would want to lose. i never could have imagined being in this predicament where comfort and lifestyle (which we have worked so hard for) are battling with this horrible feeling that i can't be with this man anymore. after what has happened i can't see there ever being a romantic relationship so staying seems like such a waste. again, redirect or anything if i am posting inappropriately. edit: i realize i should also add that, as i mentioned in the other post, he is a good husband in all other respects, even before this happened, i had been struggling with having attraction, passion, or romantic feelings for him. i couldn't pinpoint why they were lost. so realizing what he has been doing while i was passed out i believe has only been the nail in the coffin. | i'm [39/f] and want to divorce [40/m] husband for taking advantage of me | 6fz2om | godspeed. if you can't do it (this marriage), don't. everything you're worried about is secondary to the alienation of affection and safety you've experienced. protect yourself so you can look yourself in the mirror. | relationship_advice | 6fz2om |
male, 27, 5'9', 170 lbs, caucasian, smoker. was diagnosed an anaphylactic to tree nuts 20 years ago. never had a severe reaction until last night where there were traces of cashews in some noodles i ate at 15:30. didn't take my epipen cause i didn't have difficulty breathing. took a pill of benadryl at 18:00. by 19:20 i was perspiring like crazy, vision blurry, stomach and chest pains, body was fully red and itchy, hives everywhere. didn't take my epipen because i thought it was for solely when i had trouble breathing. my family convinced me to take it, and i felt immediately better. the first time i took it in 20 years. after 20 minutes, the symptoms came back and i rushed to hospital and took another epipen at 20:15 and was triaged by 20:35. the nurse didn't think it was that severe \[i don't think\] because i didn't have trouble breathing - but i had a ton of other symptoms. she asked me why i took my epipens if i didn't have any trouble breathing - alluding that i took them unnecessarily. by 21:00 my vision got blurry, i couldn't hear anything, so i went up to the nurse and said i think was going to pass out. i said i think i need another epipen, and she said i didn't, and i didn't need to take two before. the hearing loss and vision loss lasted for about a minute and thirty seconds (fading from consciousness), where the nurse rushed me onto a bed by stretcher and the doctor took my blood pressure. they found that it was extremely low and the doctor said i immediately needed an iv drip and shot of adrenaline. i was then was given steroids, benadryl, and something for the chest pains and was released after all the symptoms subsided at 00:30. after reading online, i found some articles saying the primary cause of death for people with anaphlaxis can be either shock or asphyxia. in the case of a tree nut allergy, should reactions be treated as deadly exclusively when there are breathing problems? or is the cause of death as often 'shock' as asphyxiation from a closing throat? i have read some papers online saying that death from anaphlaxis can be caused by shock - is this the case for people with food allergies? or is it only for other things, like venom? any clear information and knowledge on this topic would be appreciated, so i know how to react next time i experience symptoms. | just got discharged from a hospitalization due to anaphlactic shock. i still have some questions. | 94bsbn | i have no idea what the relative breakdown of angioedema (swelling) and hypotension (shock) is in tree nut or any food allergies, but yes, both can occur and both are serious. although i hate to blame other medical providers, it sounds crazy to me that someone wouldn't take an allergic reaction that required epi seriously only a few minutes after you gave yourself epi. yes, it sounds like you risk anaphylactic shock, and so if you have a serious allergic reaction you should give yourself epi sooner rather than later, seek medical attention, and be clear that you have a history of severe low blood pressure from tree nuts. | askdocs | 94bsbn |
hi guys. just signed up for reddit specifically because of this page. i already feel a lot of comfort reading everyone's posts and knowing that other people are going through the same things. i've been smoking every day for 5+ years and have not been able to stop for more than 1 week. i've been considering going to a local m.a meeting for quite some time now... i know they take place on a wednesday, and every day of the week i think about how i really want to go. but then wednesday comes around and i wake up feeling differently; suddenly the idea of attending a meeting doesn't seem like such a great idea. to me things couldn't be more clear: i've been cutting myself off from the best of what life has to offer by putting weed above everything else. i basically function at my lowest capacity - only ever doing the bare minimum. somehow i get by - no one would ever suspect i'm a stoner, i don't come across like it at all but this has been my secret safe place for years now. on the surface i have it all together and people think i'm doing really well but privately my life revolves around smoking weed. i'm very clear on the fact that i need to make a change and stop. in fact, a lot of the time the one thing that makes me feel the happiest / most eager about life is thinking about how my life will improve once i've stopped. i'm hyper-aware of all the ways my life will improve and i have no doubt it's going to be the best decision i've ever made. but... i just can't seem to make the decision on when to actually stop. i keep thinking i'll stop any day now, and i really do believe that the day is coming up very soon because i want a sober, clear-headed life so badly. but part of me is still holding out, waiting for something outside of myself to make the decision for me... it's almost as if i'm waiting for something bad to happen, to hit rock bottom before i really make the changes i've been talking about for so long. i shouldn't have to wait for something awful to slap me in the face in order to change things up... but at the same time my habits are so deeply ingrained that the idea of just "not smoking" all of a sudden does not feel possible. so i'm unsure what to do. it's like i can feel it coming - i know that my time smoking weed is coming to an end. i've felt the discomfort with my lifestyle increasing more and more and i'm really not enjoying being trapped in my weed-smoking bubble. i am on the verge of so many great things in my life and i know that kicking my weed habit is exactly what i need for everything to start coming together for me. but then again i have to be careful because the truth is i've felt this way for years. i've been having conversations with myself about stopping and about how great everything will be without it for literally years now. not sure exactly what i'm asking for here but i decided that if i don't go to the meeting tonight i at least should reach out to people on this thread. thanks to everyone else for sharing their stories. if anyone has any advice on how to finally make the call or what made them finally stop i'd love to hear. also if anyone has had experience with the m.a meetings and how they were in your experience i'm very curious to find out more. thanks everyone! &#x200b; &#x200b; | 1st time posting, not sure why i can't stop... | a1dfee | i attend ma and love it, it helped me get sober 6 years ago. i still attend as i feel at home there and have gained a lot from it. my suggestion to you would be to look up and fill out a cost benefit analysis worksheet. you should be able to find one for free from smart recovery online. it's pretty simple and may help you get some clarity on where you stand with quitting/not quitting. | leaves | a1dfee |
*bad person a long time ago, in a place far, far away...some people tried to kill me. i shot and probably killed them. i know in my head i did the right thing and i thought i came to peace with it a long time ago. but now the memories are visiting. i can remember now what is was like to be shot. and to shoot. i felt nothing but adrenaline at the time. it felt like i was shooting paper targets, but they were people. is something broken inside of me? i feel phony. i’m not a vet. i feel like i didn’t earn my stripes. i know in my head that that’s irrelevant, that that experience and others are perfectly valid reasons for being traumatized, but i can’t help but feel my problems aren’t as important as others’. i’ve tried to talk to my therapist and so about this and they’ve given me some advice but they just don’t understand what it’s like to be in that situation and live with what you did. thanks for listening. | [trigger warning - violence/combat] bad memories are visiting from the blue. i feel like a bar person and a phony. | 8pzkw7 | look up moral injury. it's a relatively newly recognized aspect of ptsd which might be relevant to your experience. also though you know this, you don't need to be a vet to get ptsd. most of the ptsd i treat came from child abuse and rape, not combat. and combat is still combat even if it occurred outside a military framework. | ptsd | 8pzkw7 |
i'm 24, 5'4 280lbs, white, 2 weeks, diagnosed with fibromyalgia, depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, pre diabetic and pcos. i'm on 300mg of bupropion (wellbutrin) once in the mornings, 15mg of buspirone once in the morning and once at night, zyrtec at night, along with sprintec birth control and ibuprofen 800mg for pain. the problem i'm currently having is almost complete lack of appetite. i barely eat, often forget to, so much that my blood sugar will drop and i'll feel faint. when that happens i'll eat/drink something sugary and i be okay after a few minutes. is this normal with this combination of meds? is it okay that i'm not eating much? when i do eat it's usually something small. i just tried to eat a sandwich and could only take one bite. i'm also having a hard time sleeping; staying asleep to be more specific. i wake up several times at night and often can't go back to sleep for hours. i go back to the doctor on the 10th to further discuss my fibromyalgia treatment plan. i'll bring this all up to him when i do, i'm just curious at the moment. thanks for reading! | medication side effects questions | 88v5bu | wellbutrin can be an appetite suppressant, but usually not a dramatic one. it's not okay not to eat at all. it is okay to eat less. there's something wrong if not eating is causing you to nearly pass out, and that deserves medical attention. "low blood sugar" is rare outside of medical causes, and should be worked up. significant problems with sleep can go along with depression or bipolar disorder; definitely discuss this with your doctor. | askdocs | 88v5bu |
i don't remember if we went over this in grad school, and i haven't been working in the field for over a decade, but is it possible for a person to have ptsd without a specific triggering event? **background**: i have a psychiatrist i trust, and i have been in his care for talk therapy and meds for six years to treat my major depression and my generalized anxiety disorder. any replies i get in here will not be construed as anyone online giving me medical advice, but they will help me direct a future conversation with my doctor. i earned my master's in psychology in 2000, so i can "talk shop" about many mental health issues, but it's much harder to apply that knowledge to myself. it may be worth noting that i also carry an asperger's diagnosis. **all categories of diagnostic criteria except, perhaps for the first one.** i have never been abused. my parents were great. i've never been threatened with violence. my father just died of cancer, but my symptoms have been going on for years. so many intrusive memories, flashbacks to "little (emotional) traumas" that then trigger physical responses that can last for days, avoidance of things related to emotional traumas (like breakups with old boyfriends, even though i've been happily married for years, or seeing the names of former colleagues who majorly screwed me over), many "negative alterations in cognitions and mood," and 4/6 of the "alterations in arousal and reactivity." **it is possible** that 9/11/01 could have been an initial triggering event for me. i was working with kids at a psychiatric hospital at the time, and one of our patients had lost someone in the wtc. i had to accompany a 10yo girl to the er for a rape kit when she was first admitted. those kids suffered through some horrific forms of abuse that might qualify me for the "indirect exposure in the line of duty" part. **but it's not just the 9/11 anniversaries that set me off**, or news about people hurting kids, or women getting raped. i'd just given birth to our son when hurricane katrina hit, and that song about renewal "tonight's the night the world begins again" was played all the time in the fundraisers that followed...i burst into tears at a goo goo dolls concert last year when they started playing it. a former friend of mine was exceptionally cruel to me in the recent past, and when a song played on my husband's cd in the car yesterday, i had a flashback to sitting across from that friend and hearing that song for the first time as the friend sang along with it. i nearly had a panic attack in the car, and remember it last night in bed had me sobbing into my pillow so much that i had to get up at 3am and turn my computer on to type up a letter to that friend that i probably shouldn't send but probably will anyway. could it be ptsd even if the flashbacks and other symptoms aren't necessarily triggered by anything remotely connected to my time working at the psych hospital? **i feel like it's existential trauma, but i don't think that's a thing.** i just want to know if it's an avenue worth exploring with my doctor since i've been going back downhill after having gotten better for a while. | does ptsd have to have a specific triggering event? | 2935id | the dsm changed its criteria between iv-tr and 5, so i'm not so familiar, but my understanding of criterion a4 (repeated exposure to aversive details of traumatic events) indicates that the traumatic events have to be violence with threat of death or sexual violence, and they have to be repeated traumas. the examples given are first responders collecting human remains and police officers exposed to details of child abuse. i'm not sure what context you worked in, but unless you heard repeatedly the intimate details of the abuse i would say that's probably not traumatic stress. this is not to minimize your symptomology or suffering. you sound like a very empathic person who is highly emotionally reactive. don't forget, too, that you can't "double dip" with symptoms. if you have generalized anxiety disorder and major depression, those can account for many of the symptoms that you listed. does it still sound like ptsd if you take out anything that can be attributed to your other conditions? | mentalhealth | 2935id |
i have a pretty comprehensive list of the startups doing this and have been curious about trying one of the sites that appears to be offering a high quality service, but i don't know if it's ok to post a bunch of websites here and i'd also rather just hear people's experiences. i'm considering one out of new york (state lines aren't an issue?) just because of how comprehensive their sign up/survey process is. i almost went through with it. the only one i've used (if it even counts) is liveperson's experts. it was a while ago before all these startups were around. i'd seen therapists before for various reasons. the mft seemed was nice and seemed qualified, but i couldn't get over that i was getting charged by the minute. it just felt so...unsettling to me to see the time counting and know how much i was paying per minute that i'd struggle to see it ever not be an issue for me. i also, for whatever reason, felt the need to record the whole session. i guess i'm a little obsessive about backing stuff up, but she wasn't aware i was doing it. maybe it wasn't ok with their privacy policy? most of the other, newer sites i've seen don't operate like this, but i'm still a little skeptical. | has anyone used an online therapy service and if so, what was your experience like? how many times? how long? | 1w6o8w | i think it's still illegal in a lot of states to counsel someone outside the state. | mentalhealth | 1w6o8w |
5 ft height 42kg weight indian citizen no history of smoking or drinking. her period is 12 days earlier than expected. we had sex on 10th day since the 1st day of her last menstrual bleeding. there were few subtle unprotected penetrations while we were making out. i used condoms later, thus no ejaculation inside her. and she took a plan b the other day, just to be safe. her periods are regular, sometimes 5 or 6 days late, but never this early. she noticed few blood stains on her underwear this morning. as of now (12hours later), she said colour of her period blood is just like they used to be before, she also felt clots passing by, but flow is less than previous bleedings. could it be implantation bleeding? could she be pregnant? how should we procced? | can my[22m] girlfriend[21f] be pregnant? can this early apparent bleeding be implantation bleeding? | cvbsbu | if you ask, "can she/i be pregnant?" the answer is almost always yes, but the likelihood is very low. penetration without ejaculation has a tiny risk of causing pregnancy, and plan b is a very effective way to prevent conception. bleeding after plan b is quite common. | askdocs | cvbsbu |
i have recently found out that my husband has been having an affair with a colleague of both of ours. he left our marriage and moved straight in with her. leaving me and 2 children. he has denied the affair saying that they only started dating after he had stayed with her for a week because he had nowhere else to go. however, i have discovered that when i surprised him with a trip away so he could see his friends he took his "girlfriend". treated her to a nice meal. all paid for by me. he states our marriage hasn't been good for ages. true enough we have had issues but i wanted to work at it because i love him. he, on the other hand, turned to another woman. she gave him attention etc when our marriage was tough. i feel so broken. my heart has been shredded into a million pieces. part of me wanted him back until i found out that he has been very physical with my kids (usually when i was at work). now, i need to accept that my marriage is over. he has been having an affair for months. etc etc. it's extremely difficult for me to sleep or eat or anything really. i analyse if i ever really knew the man i married. how do we get over such betrayal as an affair? especially when the spouse leaves to be with "the other woman"? i should hate him and move on, but he is all i think about. i am obsessing over this period in my life. shoulda, coulda, woulda. | infidelity. why? | 6b8ru2 | eventually, you'll probably decide you'd rather be happy, rather than allow someone else's behavior ruin your life. but right now you're still grieving and could use all the help you can get. | relationship_advice | 6b8ru2 |
hey guys, long time lurker, first time poster here. a little bit about me, and i'll do my best not to make it sound like a tumblr post. i'm a 23 year old woman, and i suffer from depression, ocd, and am in recovery for eating disorders (among other anxiety-related disorders). i've had some extremely messed up stuff happen in my past, but i've always been able to get past it because of the support i got from my boyfriend (as well as my family). however, this summer, after a mostly great but sometimes stressful seven years, we broke up. he got a great job offer, and i'm still in school, and we just couldn't find a way to make it work out. it was extremely difficult, because we loved each other so much and, if it wasn't for the move, we'd still be together. i was devastated. i failed a class because i just couldn't get out of bed in the morning. we still talk occasionally and see each other when we're in the neighborhood. it's great because we were really best friends the whole time we dated, but it's not easy on either one of us. anyways, it's been about three months since the breakup. i quit smoking cigs, and limited how often i drink and smoke weed because i know that i'll never get over this if i use a crutch. i'm starting to have more good days than bad, and i especially feel better when i get my exercise, eat a keto diet, and am able to pull my head away from work or studying (because, besides everything else, i'm taking five classes over four days and work as a bartender four days a week). lately, though, i've been having a lot of bad days in a row, and can't seem to find the momentum to get to the gym or eat right. my goal is to go to the gym at least three days a week (i usually exercise for about an hour and a half, and that works well for me). i was wondering if people on here like to do this sort of thing, and if anyone would be interested in checking in on me and having me check in on them to make sure we don't fall off the wagon. any takers? | anyone want an accountabili-buddy? | 3kasq0 | i'll take you up on this. i'm in a similar boat. 26/m who just got broken up with because my ex got accepted to do her master's at a school far away, and although we were very much in love for 4 years, and i was already planning on marrying this girl, she didn't want to try to make it work. diagnosed at 16, was doing alright for the last couple of years, and then i sank real far back down. i completely re-arranged my life, new job, etc etc, now i have a 2 hour break during my day and i go to the gym 4 or 5 days a week. i haven't had a cigarette in almost a year, give or take a few really drunken puffs from friends. i still drink a bit, rarely smoke anymore just because if i won't to be functional, i'd rather have a few glasses of whiskey. how do you want to do this? pms and stuff? (i'm not completely familiar with the reddit layout yet) | eood | 3kasq0 |
update to [here](WEBLINK). the good news is that i'm not attracted to him anymore. the bad news is that i'm questioning his competency. we've spent two sessions and a very long email going through my history. he hasn't given me any immediate advice. rather than help me with problems i have at the moment, he kept asking about my past, like what i fought with my parents about when i was a teenager. i don't remember that sort of thing. it's like he was trying to find evidence to fit his assumption that i had an emotionally deprived childhood (not true). i've been waiting for three weeks now (prolonged due to scheduling conflicts on his part) for a cbt exercise or something i can use to help me - something that's actionable now. not talking about obscure things in my past. he also writes everything i say down at a glacial pace. i'm probably a little biased because this is only his fourth year practicing. there's another psychologist i could go to who's more qualified, although more expensive -- should i hold off for another week before contacting them? the current one said he uses the first two sessions for getting to know people, so things might change in the next. i know i'm probably jumping the gun, but i've been at the end of my tether for three weeks now and i'm beyond frustrated and disappointed that things are progressing so slowly. /rant | want to change therapists after two sessions - am i jumping the gun? | 2u7o56 | there are different kinds of therapy and different styles. he's learning about you and your history, it's a slower process it seems but he probably wants to be have his facts straight. working with someone with bpd can be complicated. that being said, i don't think i've ever liked a therapist i've been to because i don't think i can handle being judged or criticised. i know they aren't doing that but it's hard to keep it in mind. | bpd | 2u7o56 |
hello everyone i am interested in how exactly this works. would they be able to or would they have to get a license for that state? for example would a pa therapist be able to see a client in say montana? | would a therapist be able to do tele therapy with a client from a different state? | hn7dma | this is completely dependent on the licensure if the therapist and each state 's laws. some states are making allowances right now. psychologists can do this more easily than master's level therapists because there is more national oversight of that license . master's level licenses and licensure requirements vary by state . i am licensed in multiple states , and i just got approval to treat a client in another state in which i'm not licensed. it was really easy. now, insurance is another matter because most providers are on regional panels. my client who is moving out of state got permission from his insurance to cover 6 months with me after he moves . | askatherapist | hn7dma |
so i have recently posted here about how i want to quit drinking at least until i finish major project i am workind on with which i've been struggling forever. yesterday, i had an unexpected inflow of money and so there were thoughts crossing my mind to follow an old pattern and buy 10 beers or half a litre of vodka and drink myself into oblivion in front of the pc. i was on the fence, battling the craving in my mind for about an hour, i was even by the alcohol stand in one shop and on the way to the other, but finally decided to come back home and order a pizza instead. it was a waste of money all the same, but still, i am happy i chose the lesser of two evils. i am going to stick to the plan and remain sober. iwndwyt | i have overcome first major urge. spent money on pizza instead of vodka. | 8ztdp0 | i agree...eat or do whatever you need to do ! well done 😀 | stopdrinking | 8ztdp0 |
i know lyme disease is a controversial topic, but please bear with me. i am a 24-year-old female living in the usa. i’m 5’11 and 180 pounds. non-smoker and no recreational drugs. medications i take include my birth control and i currently taking doxycycline 2x/day. to the story: i’ve have some on going health problems over the past couple months — namely exhaustion, hair loss, orthostatic hypotension. i won’t get into the details, but long story short, my pcp referred me to a cardiologist just to check things out. i had the appointment and they did a echocardiogram (normal) and a 24 hour holter monitor (nsr, sb, st, and sa) which was unremarkable. he also decided to order a few blood results, a cbc and lyme panel “just for the hell of it”. the same day, i heard from my pcp that my cbc came back and i was anemic — she recommended taking otc iron pills. no mention of the lyme test, which i obviously knew hadn’t resulted yet. the next day, i left on vacation for two weeks. never received a phone call or message while away. weeks later, i decided to pick up the test results, namely just wanting to see my cbc results. all of the labs drawn that day, including the lyme disease results were printed and given to me. [results](WEBLINK) now, i don’t have a trained eye but these are very obviously positive. my antibodies were positive and it was automatically reflexes to a wb test, which was 1/2 positive. following this, i called my pcp to ask her to review the results. she confirmed that i tested positive for lyme disease and prescribed me 4 weeks of doxycycline 2x/day. she apologized for not catching it, which is completely *not* her fault. she said she would take measures to report this (near) miss. what actions will she likely take? do i need to do anything? i get that things fall through the crack and i don’t believe i have any notable symptoms — it’s probably a red herring find, but wise to treat nonetheless. i know it’s also reportable to the state health department... | i was never notified of positive lyme disease results... | fimcbs | lyme disease isn't controversial in itself. *chronic* lyme disease is, and it drowns out the straightforward diagnosis and treatment of the acute tick-borne infection. there's nothing that you need to do. the case should be reported because lyme disease infection rates are tracked, but that's not important to you personally. you've gotten appropriate treatment prescribed and will hopefully feel better. | askdocs | fimcbs |
was diagnosed with "adjustment disorder with anxiety and panic" what does this entail? i've also read that adjustment disorder is just a placeholder for when doctors don't want to officially diagnose things? i'm really confused. all the research i've done also never take about the panic part? can someone give me like an eli5 answer? | what the hell is adjustment disorder? | 80ui38 | yes adjustment disorder just means you are experiencing a fair amount of depressive symptoms and/or anxiety symptoms in response to recent life stressors. all in all, it’s not that important and nothing to worry about. really no diagnosis barring maybe schizophrenia is worth putting too much weight on. i discuss this a little bit here. give a read, hopefully this is helpful. WEBLINK | mentalhealth | 80ui38 |
hello i am a 14 year old male and i had a red button on my left leg for about 2 months i think, and im not sure if its normal because it wouldn't stay that long and im getting concerned, can you guys help me | small button on leg that has been here for 2 months | e0hnvl | you have not given us a picture or enough description to be helpful. please reread rule #1 on what is required for a sufficient submission, but in this case a full description of whatever is on your leg is the only way we can have any idea what is going on. | askdocs | e0hnvl |
so all you hear all day is about peoples pain, which frankly makes it a quite depressing job. how do you manage it, like how do you not let all that sadness affect you so that you can be happy in life? also side question, about how many clients do you see when working a full work day | how do you be a therapist without letting all that pain get to you? | alyu5l | this is the number one thing new therapists often struggle with. within the first few years, you either learn how to deal with it, or burn out and leave the field. most good graduate programs that train us to be therapists either make it mandatory or highly encourage we receive our own therapy while going through the program. this is both to work out our own stuff so it doesn't impact our ability to help clients and to help set a precedent that it's normal to be a therapist in therapy and that for most of us, we should be using therapy regularly or at least intermittently while working this job. boundaries are the most important thing. when i'm at work, i'm thinking about my cases, how i can best help the people i'm working with, and in session really connecting with them on a deep personal level. when i leave work for the day, i've trained myself to leave work at work. i don't allow myself to think about my clients at all the best i can. i focus on my family and life outside of work. i'm a clinical supervisor now so i spend the majority of my time training other therapists. when i was last working as a full time therapist i was seeing 6-8 clients a day working 4, 10 hour days a week. | askatherapist | alyu5l |
looking for some good advice on eventually getting myself a boyfriend. everyone i speak to end up either end up being stalkerish or are just too good friends. although there a boy that i've hardly spoke too but i can never keep the conversation going. needing help. | advice on getting to know boys | 5rxtqq | can't go wrong going slow. identify red flags early. keep a list of topics in your mind; it'll keep the convo going | relationship_advice | 5rxtqq |
female; 40 years old; caucasian, 5'2"; 125 lbs; a few weeks, possibly pregnant; i'm currently seeing specialists for an undiagnosed medical condition that causes weakness and fatigue (although i don't think that is relevant for this question), levora (birth control), no photo required &#x200b; hello! thanks for having a look at my question here. &#x200b; i don't know why, but i have this strange feeling that i'm pregnant. i'm on the pill, and had some bleeding at the end of my last pill pack, but started a new one to make it stop. my breasts are large and sore and my period hasn't stated yet, although since being on levora it comes a little later than usual. honestly, i thought until the last few days that the bigger boobs was due to some weight gain, and i haven't been eating that well, so that could totally be what's going on. i have taken three home pregnancy tests, all negative. from the last time i had sex, i would be about 10 weeks along. wouldn't my hgc levels be high enough by now to come up on a home test? when i was pregnant with my son, i tested positive the day i was supposed to start my period. don't know if the hgc levels vary by woman or by pregnancy. &#x200b; before i thought i could be pregnant , i saw and endocrinologist about some unrelated health issues and he ordered some blood work. i got the results yesterday and if i'm pregnant, i was when the blood was drawn. not sure if all of these are applicable, but the female-related hormones he tested are: &#x200b; estradiol: <15 pg/ml (reference range: follicular phase: 19-144; mid-cycle: 64-357; luteal phase: 56-214; postmenopausal: < or = 31) fsh: <0.7 lmiu/ml (reference range: follicular phase: 2.5-10.2; mid-cycle peak: 3.1-17.7; luteal phase: 1.5- 9.1; postmenopausal: 23.0-116.3) lh: 0.2 lmiu/ml (follicular phase: 1.9-12.5; mid-cycle peak: 8.7-76.3; luteal phase: 0.5-16.9; postmenopausal: 10.0-54.7 ) prolactin: 14.4 ng/ml (reference range: non-pregnant: 3.0-30.0; pregnant: 10.0-209.0; postmenopausal: 2.0-20.0) &#x200b; is there any way to tell if i'm pregnant based on these values? my appointment with the endocrinologist isn't until next week. i thought i would reach out in the event that this bloodwork obviously answers my question, rather than waste the time of a lab and money of getting additional blood tests if they aren't necessary. &#x200b; thank you! &#x200b; | pregnancy/blood work question | ans4kk | the chance of multiple false-negative pregnancy tests is minuscule. you're not pregnant. the hormone tests are also not consistent with pregnancy. i'm neither an ob-gyn nor an endocrinologist, so i have no expertise, but low lh, with very low fsh and estradiol might suggest some kind of endocrine issue. possibly hypothalamic? it's not something i know. the pregnancy tests answer your original question, but i think you do want to see the endocrinologist to get clarification about the tests. | askdocs | ans4kk |
17/female/avg height and weight hi, this is my first time posting here so if i do something wrong, apologies in advance. i am psychotic and on an antidepressant and an antipsychotic. for the past four or so years, i have been freezing up. i stop moving, and it is as if i am unable to mentally get myself to move. physically, it seems i am fine- i am not paralyzed. when this happens, i get confused and and am disoriented after, and during, it is very hard for me to respond to external stimuli. this only lasts from seconds to minutes what could this be? thank you so much and if anything is confusing, i will clarify (i'm not the best with my words) | why do i unintentionally stop moving? | 6sp7u3 | what medication are you on? what do your docs think is happening? | askdocs | 6sp7u3 |
i accidentally doubled up on my iron today and ended up taking 700mg at dinner. do i need to be worried and or cautious about symptoms or something else? should i take my next dose tommorow or skip it? 31 f, canada type 1 diabetic (insulin) hypothyrodism (levothyroxine) polyglandular autoimmune syndrome type 2 pcos suspected gastroparesis (lansoprazole) raynaud's/very slow capillary refill/ some sort of circulation issue that has yet to been identified anxiety and depression (effxor and mirtazapine) edit: i was reading one thing and typing an other | i accidentally took too much iron!!! | 9w9u3f | the amount of iron you can get is limited by absorption. taking twice as much won't actually increase the amount of iron that ends up inside you. what might happen is more upset stomach with it, but it's not dangerous and if it does happen will go away in a few hours. take your next dose normally. | askdocs | 9w9u3f |
i think i might be depressed and don't know what to do. all joy seems to have disappeared from life. everything is a chore, even playing with my great 6 year old son who is super enthusiastic his dad is home for two weeks for the holidays. i have a job that pays very well for little effort but i have conflicts with the family who are not manager material and don't show any leadership. i hate every second there. during the weekend and holidays, i sleep till noon and 4 pm i'm exhausted already. i feel there is nothing to look forward to, even the 3 week roadtrip around italy my wife is planning for next summer doesn't excite me. i'd rather stay home and sleep. i'm continuously bored, counting down the hours until i can go to sleep. am i depressed and what should i do? this is not "really living" any more, just being alive. thank you for all the comments and help you might offer beforehand. edit... update... first, thank you very much for all the replies, very much appreciated! i should add a few more elements that might help you to understand what's going on. one. my wife is south korean and has a very hard time living here in europe. i'm continuously translating, negociating,... just about anything. she can't help it but it is very tiring. two. my son has some medical condition (non life threatening, thank heavens) that causes him to wake up every two, three hours, need two minutes of attention and then goes back to sleep. so the past five years, i have rarely slept more than 3 hours in one go. three. i'm a neat and tidy person and i love minimalism. my student flat used to be, eh, just about empty, just the stuff you need, a few beautiful things, the rest functional. my wife is not. our house is *full*¨of stuff *everywhere* and as much as i try to organise things, it's no use and it makes me very nervous to see all this *stuff* around me. not her fault of course, not saying that. four. i'm the only one in the household who has an income. my wife doesn't work and doesn't receive any benefits (long story), so although i make good money, money still *always* is tight when three people have to live off it. money is a constant worry (that's why i could never afford to pay 80€ an hour or something like that for a psychiatrist, in my country social security does not cover psychologists or psychiatrists, you have to pay yourself). | what are the first signs of depression? | 5kpziy | yep - either see a gp/pcp or a psychiatrist like me - depending on severity and personal needs, you might wish to consider antidepressants and/or talking therapies. [depression](WEBLINK) | askdocs | 5kpziy |
edit: on my app the below is listed. i apologize if it shows up as a paragraph with hyphens... quick background: -together 10 years since were younger. -still at home but bought home together, marriage future etc -because being at home, sex is vanilla, not often. -both of us were virgins before, each others firsts. -i'd like to think i'm much more adventurous sexually. she suggests she'd be more open with our own place but i don't think she'd be at my level, which is fine, i get the compromise if her level at least goes up a bit.. -she's had a sketchy past, family members not there, not faithful multiple times, lies etc. i have always sympathized with that and brought her into a stable family. her family is more stable now and we get along great. i admit to always having thoughts on a "one time thing" though. because of her past, she has confidence and trust issues. confidence issues occur with porn. she's intimidated by it and made me promise not to watch. she caught me once. i tried to explain it's a visual thing, just to get off. mental for me sometimes just doesn't work all the time and i gotta relieve sometimes. one and done. she's held this over me that i lied once about pron... -i know it's wrong. i just.. sometimes have the bad thought of wanting to try something once as i've never been with anyone else -[important] cheating is wrong and bad yes... but because of her past, and her coincidence issues and trust issues, she's always half joking of me cheating on her, having dreams i'm cheating on her and being upset for a bit n the morning. she's suspect of any female friends i talk to etc. it's gotten better.. but still. -that fuels the urge of "if she suspects anyway.... why not" i know you guys will think i'm crazy for even staying (no i'm not perfect either) because it sounds like i'm unhappy, especially because of the trust thing above but we get along amazing otherwise. asides from sex, she's my best friend and we share interests and do all those things together. i know the grass is not greener on the other side, and perhaps there also and raiment i use to try to say "try it once, you'll be disappointed but no longer curious" how do you guys deal? man what should i do? | how do you deal with monogamy in a long term? [29m] | 6afhbx | this is a common issue. life is a trade off, and if you value monogamy and your life with her, than you have to accept what is. if you're patient and not pushy, most people are able to become more 'adventurous' as time goes on. porn , masturbation and fantasy is a private thing, and as long as it doesn't undermine your relationship, is considered fine and normal in most secular circles. keep it private/discreet and know the difference between fantasy and reality. | relationship_advice | 6afhbx |
i drilled into my finger with a broken drill bit by accident. there is a little metal piece stuck in my finger. it did not register that i should go to the doctor. it's been 4 days now. i will be getting the shot tomorrow morning, but is it too late for the shot? my last shot was in high school, i was maybe 13-14. &#x200b; * age - 28 * sex - m * height - 180cm * weight - 90kg * race - europe white * duration of complaint - 4 days * location (geographic and on body) - left thumb * any existing relevant medical issues (if any) - none * current medications (if any) - none | how long do i have to get a tetanus shot after being stabbed by metal? | bcz2t9 | tetanus has protective effects that last at least 10 years. its not just for this incident, also for future incidents. | askdocs | bcz2t9 |