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@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@Notsureofwhat: They’ll also communicate your face to other crows like their children. There are a lot of interesting stories about the shiny things crows give!
It’s ominous when a crow gives you a random key.
@heretogetpwned: Sounds like a writing prompt.
@Salieri: | I definitely read something on nosleep once about a guy beginning to feed crows and initially being left coins and buttons before they started bringing him bits of bone and teeth. |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@Notsureofwhat: They’ll also communicate your face to other crows like their children. There are a lot of interesting stories about the shiny things crows give!
It’s ominous when a crow gives you a random key.
@hardtoremember: I either read or watched something about that and apparently they described people in remarkable detail.
@Salieri: | Where can I learn crow? I want to hear a crow describe a man's face. |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@Notsureofwhat: They’ll also communicate your face to other crows like their children. There are a lot of interesting stories about the shiny things crows give!
It’s ominous when a crow gives you a random key.
@hardtoremember: I either read or watched something about that and apparently they described people in remarkable detail.
@ComedicFish: Wtf how??? They have language!!??!
@ray_giraffe: They speak Pigeon English ;)
@Salieri: | Sup brah? You like beef or whad? |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@Notsureofwhat: They’ll also communicate your face to other crows like their children. There are a lot of interesting stories about the shiny things crows give!
It’s ominous when a crow gives you a random key.
@hardtoremember: I either read or watched something about that and apparently they described people in remarkable detail.
@ComedicFish: Wtf how??? They have language!!??!
@TeaWithNosferatu: Yeah! Apparently they have their own dialect they speak within their own group/murder? and then a universal one so they can communicate with other crows!
@Salieri: | And it's expansive enough to describe a human face enough to recognise? Very impressive. I doubt I could describe a human face well enough for them to be recognised |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@Notsureofwhat: They’ll also communicate your face to other crows like their children. There are a lot of interesting stories about the shiny things crows give!
It’s ominous when a crow gives you a random key.
@Salieri: | I want so see how a crow sketch artist would draw me |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@Notsureofwhat: They’ll also communicate your face to other crows like their children. There are a lot of interesting stories about the shiny things crows give!
It’s ominous when a crow gives you a random key.
@Takeurvitamins: Birds of a black
Black feather stick together forever and
ever and they always remember you
And all of the shit you do
They pass it to the baby birdies and then they remember too
Little baby bluebird eyes turn black
Without forgetting the face of the guy in the mask
When you see me baby will you scream or will you laugh?
Little baby blue bird, eyes turn black
@Salieri: | Didn't expect to see any Aesop anywhere on here |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@Notsureofwhat: They’ll also communicate your face to other crows like their children. There are a lot of interesting stories about the shiny things crows give!
It’s ominous when a crow gives you a random key.
@Takeurvitamins: Birds of a black
Black feather stick together forever and
ever and they always remember you
And all of the shit you do
They pass it to the baby birdies and then they remember too
Little baby bluebird eyes turn black
Without forgetting the face of the guy in the mask
When you see me baby will you scream or will you laugh?
Little baby blue bird, eyes turn black
@Salieri: | Cool |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@StrigaPlease: Corvids in general are incredibly intelligent. Some have even been trained to pick up litter on beaches in exchange for treats, and I remember reading a story about a girl that would drop crumbs on her way to school for the crows and they started bringing her ribbons and tinsel because she tended to wear clothes with ribbons.
On the flip side as well, they’ll remember who treats them badly. Plenty of stories about assholes that would throw rocks at them getting serial bird bombed constantly, even when they weren’t anywhere near the area where they abused the birds, and even watching to see what car they drove so they could get a nice thick layer all over it. Corvids are basically the bird form of “don’t start no shit.”
@boudicas_shield: I just burst dramatically into our living room and announced to my bewildered husband that “we need to find some crows, and we need to start feeding them.”
@q_a_non_sequitur: IT’S COOL HONEY WE JUST NEED CORVID-20
@Salieri: | Brilliant |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@StrigaPlease: Corvids in general are incredibly intelligent. Some have even been trained to pick up litter on beaches in exchange for treats, and I remember reading a story about a girl that would drop crumbs on her way to school for the crows and they started bringing her ribbons and tinsel because she tended to wear clothes with ribbons.
On the flip side as well, they’ll remember who treats them badly. Plenty of stories about assholes that would throw rocks at them getting serial bird bombed constantly, even when they weren’t anywhere near the area where they abused the birds, and even watching to see what car they drove so they could get a nice thick layer all over it. Corvids are basically the bird form of “don’t start no shit.”
@boudicas_shield: I just burst dramatically into our living room and announced to my bewildered husband that “we need to find some crows, and we need to start feeding them.”
@Salieri: | I had the same thought. I want smart little birdie friends |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@StrigaPlease: Corvids in general are incredibly intelligent. Some have even been trained to pick up litter on beaches in exchange for treats, and I remember reading a story about a girl that would drop crumbs on her way to school for the crows and they started bringing her ribbons and tinsel because she tended to wear clothes with ribbons.
On the flip side as well, they’ll remember who treats them badly. Plenty of stories about assholes that would throw rocks at them getting serial bird bombed constantly, even when they weren’t anywhere near the area where they abused the birds, and even watching to see what car they drove so they could get a nice thick layer all over it. Corvids are basically the bird form of “don’t start no shit.”
@boudicas_shield: I just burst dramatically into our living room and announced to my bewildered husband that “we need to find some crows, and we need to start feeding them.”
@Salieri: | Right? Now I’m in bed pondering how I can attract some crows to my house |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@StrigaPlease: Corvids in general are incredibly intelligent. Some have even been trained to pick up litter on beaches in exchange for treats, and I remember reading a story about a girl that would drop crumbs on her way to school for the crows and they started bringing her ribbons and tinsel because she tended to wear clothes with ribbons.
On the flip side as well, they’ll remember who treats them badly. Plenty of stories about assholes that would throw rocks at them getting serial bird bombed constantly, even when they weren’t anywhere near the area where they abused the birds, and even watching to see what car they drove so they could get a nice thick layer all over it. Corvids are basically the bird form of “don’t start no shit.”
@boudicas_shield: I just burst dramatically into our living room and announced to my bewildered husband that “we need to find some crows, and we need to start feeding them.”
@Salieri: | I was seriously just sitting here wondering how to get some crows over to my property!! |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@StrigaPlease: Corvids in general are incredibly intelligent. Some have even been trained to pick up litter on beaches in exchange for treats, and I remember reading a story about a girl that would drop crumbs on her way to school for the crows and they started bringing her ribbons and tinsel because she tended to wear clothes with ribbons.
On the flip side as well, they’ll remember who treats them badly. Plenty of stories about assholes that would throw rocks at them getting serial bird bombed constantly, even when they weren’t anywhere near the area where they abused the birds, and even watching to see what car they drove so they could get a nice thick layer all over it. Corvids are basically the bird form of “don’t start no shit.”
@Salieri: | Read it as covid-s at first whoops but aww such a cute story! |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@StrigaPlease: Corvids in general are incredibly intelligent. Some have even been trained to pick up litter on beaches in exchange for treats, and I remember reading a story about a girl that would drop crumbs on her way to school for the crows and they started bringing her ribbons and tinsel because she tended to wear clothes with ribbons.
On the flip side as well, they’ll remember who treats them badly. Plenty of stories about assholes that would throw rocks at them getting serial bird bombed constantly, even when they weren’t anywhere near the area where they abused the birds, and even watching to see what car they drove so they could get a nice thick layer all over it. Corvids are basically the bird form of “don’t start no shit.”
@Salieri: | Here in Australia we have magpies, which swoop in spring nesting season. It’s been discovered that they carry on memories for generations. If a dark haired man threw a stone at the nest in 1985, the descendants of those birds will still be swooping dark haired men in 2020.
The magpies at my schoo, and we fed them scraps of leftover lunches. We never ever had a problem with sweeping magpies, probably because they were never attacked. |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@Vykel_VileBlood: Crows being as intelligent as they are may have seen your face and the shiny thing in your hand. (Phone coins keys knife whatever it could’ve been) and assumed.
Ah shit they like shiny things to? Hell yeah I’ll bring them the shiniest of shinies HEY GUYS. THEY LIKE SHINY THINGS!!!
And so. Coins
@SlapCracklePlop: Im going to start feeding crows while wearing a suit made of money.
@Salieri: | Sounds like a plan my guy |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@Vykel_VileBlood: Crows being as intelligent as they are may have seen your face and the shiny thing in your hand. (Phone coins keys knife whatever it could’ve been) and assumed.
Ah shit they like shiny things to? Hell yeah I’ll bring them the shiniest of shinies HEY GUYS. THEY LIKE SHINY THINGS!!!
And so. Coins
@SlapCracklePlop: Im going to start feeding crows while wearing a suit made of money.
@Salieri: | I LOLED SO HARD THANKS |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@dog75: I have a co-worker who’s dog attacked a crow and killed it(sucks I know). The other crows remembered the dog and dive bombed him every time they got the chance.
@armoredtarek: Our old cat ate a baby crow that fell out of the nest. For the next few weeks they dive bombed him when he went outside. Then he caught one out of the air and ate it and they decided to sit on the power line and heckle him from a distance. They did it for years until he passed.
@Salieri: | "Get a load of this guy" |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@dog75: I have a co-worker who’s dog attacked a crow and killed it(sucks I know). The other crows remembered the dog and dive bombed him every time they got the chance.
@Sleipnoir: My dog attacked a crow and I brought it to a vet that does bird rescue. I've always wondered if the bird lived and when I see other crows I wonder if it's that one. But it probably wouldn't come back to the place it was attacked
@Salieri: | Not with that attitude. |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@HungryHungryHaruspex: They don't really have a concept of currency, they're just fascinated by shiny objects. But they are leaving the coins as a sign of gratitude - they're that developed. They'll even "sled" using lids on icy rooftops for fun.
Whatever you do don't piss them off.
@Salieri: | I once had a 30 foot tall barn with a loooot of roof. Snow would pile up to the eaves, so there would be a good 60-70 feet of slope. The crows.would get anything flat they could pick up and snowboard down that sucker. It was amazing! They would also constantly have arguments with the one raven who visited my property, but even though there were about 20 of them, they bee attacked him. It made me wonder what had happened in the past for him to earn that respect. He'd hang out on the hay pulley arm and just watch shit go down. |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@Salieri: | They know the value of objects and food is one value for them and shiny things are one as well, they also happen to know humans like shiny things as well |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@SeeWhatEyeSee: Ravens are very similar. Don't be an ass to them though, as they will be an ass right back. I provoked one a few years ago, and after a few days they must've found my balcony I would smoke on. There would often be one hangin out on it just making noise, Shit all over the place.
They bugged me for a couple months, then someone said to give them something. A handful of my dogs fur after a brushing, then more and more. Now I leave some outside once in a while, no more shitty balcony
@knightofbraids: I feel like this is the closest we come in our modern world to having to appease vengeful local spirits and faeries.
@Salieri: | Each time a faerie and animals are mentioned it reminds me of that post I once read, about how we humans are to animals exactly what faeries are to us. |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@Salieri: | Crows are terrifyingly intelligent creatures. I try to be nice to all crows just in case they decide to go the magpie route and be more of a hindrance lol |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@Salieri: | Yup... Our local crows hate me because they were eating a dead bird in my yard and I shooed them away and threw the mutilated dead bird in the trash. They were mad I ruined their lunch.
Now any day that is nice outside and they are around they get mad when I step out of the house. They see me and start flying around caw cawing and all angry. Only me. Not the other 3 people who live here. |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@Salieri: | How did you start? I’ve tried feeding crows near me before and never had any luck. What do you leave them? |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@Salieri: | Your post made me want to feed the crows in my area! |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@Salieri: | Just don’t accidentally hurt or kill one of them. The murder never forgets the murderer. |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@Salieri: | I read a story recently about a girl that fed crows losing the lens cap to her camera and them bring it back because they followed her. |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@neuroticbrunette: I had read that somewhere years ago, that crows remember your face. I didn’t know that they like to bring shiny things, more specifically money, to humans! The fact that they can recognize money and continue bringing pennies, blows my mind
@Salieri: | I once rescued a wounded juvenile crow in my yard, much to his parents dismay. (Don't worry, the shelter released the crow near where I got him so they could reunite). Anyway, the next day, my mom and I went on a hike about 2 miles from my house. We were SURROUNDED by crows near the start, in the trees, making noise. I told my mom, "I think they know I'm the one who took their friend." Was never sure but, it seems now like it's completely possible. |
@tinyirishgirl: And they know and remember your face.
They are everything wonderful.
@Salieri: | That is freaking awesome |
@TonkaButt: Crows like shiny and metallic things.
Growing up a buddy of mine had a pet crow and it used to bring him screws, nuts, bolts etc.
One time his dad was rebuilding a lawnmower outside and the crow kept coming down and taking bolts and nuts out of the pile he had during disassembly.
@wolverine-claws: Okay that’s adorable, but I can imagine that that would have been super annoying, hahaha.
@temporarybeing65: My parents had a pet crow and it flew off with my dad’s watch. edited for punctuation lol
@q_a_non_sequitur: Chose his exit appropriately, wonder how much he pawned it for. Probably got him at least past Omaha.
@Salieri: | They found his stash one day and it was quite a collection |
@ramtax666: I suggest to start giving special food to the ones that bring you more valuable coins, teach them some capitalism.
@rojm: maybe other little things like..... air pods
@12INCHVOICES: I actually kind of always wondered about this. Like, could you teach a crow (/whatever type of bird) to fly into an open window, recognize valuable items, and have them bring it to you? Or would the "fear" instinct be too strong to override? Or is entire thought just stupid?
@Salieri: | There are YouTube videos of crows problem solving puzzles and stuff. They’d likely have the capacity to learn something like that. |
@ramtax666: I suggest to start giving special food to the ones that bring you more valuable coins, teach them some capitalism.
@rojm: maybe other little things like..... air pods
@12INCHVOICES: I actually kind of always wondered about this. Like, could you teach a crow (/whatever type of bird) to fly into an open window, recognize valuable items, and have them bring it to you? Or would the "fear" instinct be too strong to override? Or is entire thought just stupid?
@Salieri: | Ah yes... The perfect crime. |
@ramtax666: I suggest to start giving special food to the ones that bring you more valuable coins, teach them some capitalism.
@rojm: maybe other little things like..... air pods
@leatyZ: Sheesh, now I imagine a flock(?) of crows striving the city, attacking innocent people to steal their AirPods.
@TNT1987: Murder. A murder of crows
@Salieri: | Allegedly |
@ramtax666: I suggest to start giving special food to the ones that bring you more valuable coins, teach them some capitalism.
@rojm: maybe other little things like..... air pods
@Salieri: | Second Generation, not first. |
@ramtax666: I suggest to start giving special food to the ones that bring you more valuable coins, teach them some capitalism.
@winwithaneontheend: This is super possible. In some places crows have been successfully trained to pick up cigarette butts. If they can distinguish between wrappers and cigarettes then they should be able to identify quarters.
@Salieri: | Writing prompt: A witch trains her pet crow to help her steal items from the king who tried to execute her.
"Bring me the king's diamond ring," she chuckles gleefully and sends her crow flying off into the pressing darkness of the night.
Hours later there is a frantic tapping at the window. The old hag lets her pet in, eyes eagerly awaiting the coveted treasure. He drops something small and round at her feet and she snatches it up eagerly.
"No!" She flies into a rage. "That's a piece of coal you fucking idiot!" |
@ramtax666: I suggest to start giving special food to the ones that bring you more valuable coins, teach them some capitalism.
@Knox123R: YEAHH MAKE PROFIT OUT OF ANIMALS YEAHH SLAVERY /s
@brendan_559: Nah, not slavery. The crows are getting paid with snacks!
@Salieri: | And of course these crows are still free, they still have free will. Obviously it's easier for them to go foraging for coins and buy food with it than it is to just go foraging for food. |
@ramtax666: I suggest to start giving special food to the ones that bring you more valuable coins, teach them some capitalism.
@Knox123R: YEAHH MAKE PROFIT OUT OF ANIMALS YEAHH SLAVERY /s
@brendan_559: Nah, not slavery. The crows are getting paid with snacks!
@Fruity_Pineapple: That's how you do with slaves. If you don't give them food regularly, you have less slaves after a while.
@Salieri: | I never actually thought about it like that. That's much more horrifying |
@ramtax666: I suggest to start giving special food to the ones that bring you more valuable coins, teach them some capitalism.
@Knox123R: YEAHH MAKE PROFIT OUT OF ANIMALS YEAHH SLAVERY /s
@Salieri: | I know /s, but is it rea, but is it really slavery if they’re given food without the expectation of reward? It’s more like animal employees. Gotta make a whole new department to take care of Animal Resource issues. Make sure they know what’s appropriate in the workplace and whatnot. |
@Sprayface: The IRS wants to know your location
@wellenkopf: They know. Birds aren't real.
@Salieri: | Details of stimulus payments REVEALED |
@Sprayface: The IRS wants to know your location
@wellenkopf: They know. Birds aren't real.
@Salieri: | Classic IRS honey pot |
@Sprayface: The IRS wants to know your location
@Salieri: | How does one claim “bird restaurant” on their taxes, anyway? |
@NotYourSnowBunny: Gotta teach them that bills are more valuable. They're smart, they know.
@ManOfHart: Put out 10 5 dollar bills, every time they come to eat, let them watch you take one bill away and put it in your pocket, then promptly give them more food. This should.click for them and associate paper money for food. Then profit.
@Salieri: | There are documented instances of people training corvids to do this. I've honestly been thinking about it in recent weeks. Pavlov style, plus who doesn't want to be Mæster of the Aviarans? |
@NotYourSnowBunny: Gotta teach them that bills are more valuable. They're smart, they know.
@ManOfHart: Put out 10 5 dollar bills, every time they come to eat, let them watch you take one bill away and put it in your pocket, then promptly give them more food. This should.click for them and associate paper money for food. Then profit.
@Salieri: | My new side hustle: a food business for crows |
@SeerPumpkin: That's so sweet of you and of them! I wish I had crows over here :/
@Salieri: | It’s honestly crazy to think about little birds being so intelligent, that they look for pennies and remember to bring them all the way! |
@My_Past_defines_me: That's cool. But like what position did you play, 6'4 where you middle blocker
@throwaway7783398: Yes, I played middle blocker and my wife played setter. (she’s 5’11)
@My_Past_defines_me: Damm that's super cool, I played a little bit, I played middle blocker as well, I am 5"8 tho the shortest guy in my team. Such a cute love story.
@UltimatelifeformKar: lmao i just watch "haikyuu!".
@jakopoli: Yeah bro 5”8 is tall for half of the middle blockers i know
@TheMangoMan2: I watched Haikyuu, fell in love with volleyball, but its my last year of highschool and im too busy to join any teams:((( and im moving to cali after highschool where if I joined a team I would get assfucked by these kids who have been playing since birth
@jakopoli: Yeah there isn’t even a men’s volleyball team at my school. But at the very least, the show let me have a different outlook on sports in general.
@Salieri: | Yeah I went to a private school and there wasnt even enough kids for a football team much kess a MENS volleyball team...:( |
@My_Past_defines_me: That's cool. But like what position did you play, 6'4 where you middle blocker
@throwaway7783398: Yes, I played middle blocker and my wife played setter. (she’s 5’11)
@My_Past_defines_me: Damm that's super cool, I played a little bit, I played middle blocker as well, I am 5"8 tho the shortest guy in my team. Such a cute love story.
@UltimatelifeformKar: lmao i just watch "haikyuu!".
@Salieri: | Asahi Lastoooo !!!! |
@My_Past_defines_me: That's cool. But like what position did you play, 6'4 where you middle blocker
@throwaway7783398: Yes, I played middle blocker and my wife played setter. (she’s 5’11)
@themanyfaceasian: Goddamn you both are tall
@zzainal: Ikr
Cries in 5"5
@Salieri: | 5'7 here. Thank you for making me feel a little better. |
@My_Past_defines_me: That's cool. But like what position did you play, 6'4 where you middle blocker
@throwaway7783398: Yes, I played middle blocker and my wife played setter. (she’s 5’11)
@themanyfaceasian: Goddamn you both are tall
@zzainal: Ikr
Cries in 5"5
@msndrstdmstrmnd: Cries in 5’0”
@Salieri: | Wanna trade? I want to be smol |
@My_Past_defines_me: That's cool. But like what position did you play, 6'4 where you middle blocker
@throwaway7783398: Yes, I played middle blocker and my wife played setter. (she’s 5’11)
@themanyfaceasian: Goddamn you both are tall
@zzainal: Ikr
Cries in 5"5
@msndrstdmstrmnd: Cries in 5’0”
@Salieri: | Confused european person sounds
(I looked up and im 5,5 feet) |
@My_Past_defines_me: That's cool. But like what position did you play, 6'4 where you middle blocker
@throwaway7783398: Yes, I played middle blocker and my wife played setter. (she’s 5’11)
@themanyfaceasian: Goddamn you both are tall
@zzainal: Ikr
Cries in 5"5
@msndrstdmstrmnd: Cries in 5’0”
@Salieri: | There are pros and cons to more or less everything. Smaller isn't worse, and taller isn't better. Both are good in ways and worse in ways.
Guarantee after bumping your head into stuff and having a harder time finding clothes or fitting comfortably in anything, beds are probably harder to find and more expensive, you'd change your mind about that tall bit. Sure you can reach everything nice and high, but if you're smaller the world has bigger options - chaiars and beds are more comfortable, clothes might still be a bit of an issue for people even smaller than that but not as much for tall people. Shorties will know what it's like to get smothered in hugs, tall people will know what it's like to smother people - neither really so much the reverse.
And if you're somewhere in between well, the world is comfortable which is the pro and the con is there's nothing particularly special either way. Every seat is just a seat, every encounter is just you normal size, you can't reach things too tall and you have to duck for things too short.
Grass is always greener, eh?
Course, on your side you can always ask to piggy back people and ride them around like two legged horses. So what's holding you back from taking advantage of that fact? |
@My_Past_defines_me: That's cool. But like what position did you play, 6'4 where you middle blocker
@throwaway7783398: Yes, I played middle blocker and my wife played setter. (she’s 5’11)
@themanyfaceasian: Goddamn you both are tall
@zzainal: Ikr
Cries in 5"5
@Salieri: | 5'5" gang
cries |
@My_Past_defines_me: That's cool. But like what position did you play, 6'4 where you middle blocker
@throwaway7783398: Yes, I played middle blocker and my wife played setter. (she’s 5’11)
@themanyfaceasian: Goddamn you both are tall
@zzainal: Ikr
Cries in 5"5
@Salieri: | Laughs in 6’1 |
@My_Past_defines_me: That's cool. But like what position did you play, 6'4 where you middle blocker
@throwaway7783398: Yes, I played middle blocker and my wife played setter. (she’s 5’11)
@themanyfaceasian: Goddamn you both are tall
@Salieri: | I mean, she did say volleyball |
@My_Past_defines_me: That's cool. But like what position did you play, 6'4 where you middle blocker
@throwaway7783398: Yes, I played middle blocker and my wife played setter. (she’s 5’11)
@Potahtoed: This looks like the alternate ending of haikyuu to me
@My_Past_defines_me: What is haikyuu is it a game?
@Potahtoed: Its a manga that has been adapted as an anime as well ... It recently came to an end after 8 or more years or so (anime is still ongoing) ... Its about volleyball and its one of the best sports manga / anime out there ... Definitely worth checking out .. available on Netflix
@My_Past_defines_me: Thank you
@Potahtoed: Not a problem ... Do check it out its beautiful
@Salieri: | Will do |
@My_Past_defines_me: That's cool. But like what position did you play, 6'4 where you middle blocker
@throwaway7783398: Yes, I played middle blocker and my wife played setter. (she’s 5’11)
@Potahtoed: This looks like the alternate ending of haikyuu to me
@My_Past_defines_me: What is haikyuu is it a game?
@veenya: it’s an anime about volleyball!
@Salieri: | I am interested I will watch it |
@My_Past_defines_me: That's cool. But like what position did you play, 6'4 where you middle blocker
@throwaway7783398: Yes, I played middle blocker and my wife played setter. (she’s 5’11)
@Potahtoed: This looks like the alternate ending of haikyuu to me
@RightInformation: Gender Bender Haikyuu
@Salieri: | Haikyuuri |
@My_Past_defines_me: That's cool. But like what position did you play, 6'4 where you middle blocker
@throwaway7783398: Yes, I played middle blocker and my wife played setter. (she’s 5’11)
@Potahtoed: This looks like the alternate ending of haikyuu to me
@Salieri: | Tsukishima x Kageyama then? |
@My_Past_defines_me: That's cool. But like what position did you play, 6'4 where you middle blocker
@throwaway7783398: Yes, I played middle blocker and my wife played setter. (she’s 5’11)
@wofwinter: 6'4" and 5'11", your kids are going to be tall. Umm, Wait.. Nevermind!!
Love the beautiful story.
@Salieri: | I had exactly this thought |
@My_Past_defines_me: That's cool. But like what position did you play, 6'4 where you middle blocker
@throwaway7783398: Yes, I played middle blocker and my wife played setter. (she’s 5’11)
@Salieri: | I guess she was the 1 for you after all! |
@My_Past_defines_me: That's cool. But like what position did you play, 6'4 where you middle blocker
@throwaway7783398: Yes, I played middle blocker and my wife played setter. (she’s 5’11)
@Salieri: | You guys are reminding me of haikyuu. For those who don't know,do watch it if you are into volleyball |
@My_Past_defines_me: That's cool. But like what position did you play, 6'4 where you middle blocker
@throwaway7783398: Yes, I played middle blocker and my wife played setter. (she’s 5’11)
@Salieri: | That's very cool. My wife is 6'4" as well, and played middle. |
@My_Past_defines_me: That's cool. But like what position did you play, 6'4 where you middle blocker
@throwaway7783398: Yes, I played middle blocker and my wife played setter. (she’s 5’11)
@LeMaik: Wait, isnt there rotation in who does what every round in volleyball?
@EsbenT: Each half of a volleyball court is divided into six zones, which I suppose can be defined as positions. But the different roles in volleyball (setter, outside hitter, libero et.al.) are not tied to where a player happens to be in the rotation.
While I'm sure the intended function of the rotation is to avoid repetitiveness, players can freely move about their side of the court once the serve has been taken. That's why players will line up in a seemingly irregular pattern, as opposed to a systematic "6 dots on a dice" or W shape, before dispersing when the serve happens.
Hope that wasn't too long-winded :p
@LeMaik: Not too long winded. I asked for an explanation, you delivered. Thanks :D
Thats why reddit, not twitter, right? ;)
Anyway. Makes sense, but why have the rotation at all then?
@EsbenT: At the higher level, I'm not sure...
But it's clearly good for amateurs because it means that you actually do rotate and keep the game fresh. Instead of one person slamming down epic spikes every rally, or the same person fumbling on recieving every serve :p
@Salieri: | Yes, definitely. Also everyone gets to play at some point :D |
@My_Past_defines_me: That's cool. But like what position did you play, 6'4 where you middle blocker
@throwaway7783398: Yes, I played middle blocker and my wife played setter. (she’s 5’11)
@Salieri: | Hearing about you tall women helps my trans ass deal with my fears of being too tall lol |
@My_Past_defines_me: That's cool. But like what position did you play, 6'4 where you middle blocker
@throwaway7783398: Yes, I played middle blocker and my wife played setter. (she’s 5’11)
@Salieri: | You mother fuckers are tall |
@My_Past_defines_me: That's cool. But like what position did you play, 6'4 where you middle blocker
@throwaway7783398: Yes, I played middle blocker and my wife played setter. (she’s 5’11)
@Salieri: | Such a sweet combo. So happy for you guys! Beat wishes! |
@My_Past_defines_me: That's cool. But like what position did you play, 6'4 where you middle blocker
@throwaway7783398: Yes, I played middle blocker and my wife played setter. (she’s 5’11)
@Salieri: | Dang. Those will be some D1 babies |
@My_Past_defines_me: That's cool. But like what position did you play, 6'4 where you middle blocker
@throwaway7783398: Yes, I played middle blocker and my wife played setter. (she’s 5’11)
@Salieri: | I would say you're a power couple but neither of you played left side :p |
@fuckincaillou: Oh my god, this is like a enemies-to-lovers fanfiction to the hilt but I love it!
OP, you two are precious and very tall
@koticgood: Yuri Haikyuu doujin script
@Salieri: | Some Shimizu x Yaichi would be nice |
@fuckincaillou: Oh my god, this is like a enemies-to-lovers fanfiction to the hilt but I love it!
OP, you two are precious and very tall
@koticgood: Yuri Haikyuu doujin script
@Salieri: | You turned OP’s entire post into a frickin’ yojijukugo |
@ET318: This is the kind of story that Disney would make a movie about
@churadley: Although the actual details are way different, awkward outcast lesbian gets with hot bully is one of the plot lines of Booksmart. There’s even an animated scene in the film... although it’s pretty far from Disney.
@rkapi24: LOL but what about that sweet sweet homophobic Chinese money Disney wants?
@weeping_angel_fish: The best they'd do is a Disney short, like that one on Disney+
@Salieri: | Is it called “Out”? I watched that the other day and thought it was super cute. |
@ET318: This is the kind of story that Disney would make a movie about
@vigilantcomicpenguin: If anyone here knows any movie producers, we need to pitch this idea for a rom-com. This could be big.
@Cudillera: Oh they see these convos. Someone has taken notes ;)
@Salieri: | We'll see this on Buzzfeed tomorrow and somehow they'll turn it into a list of 13 things with a clickbait title |
@ET318: This is the kind of story that Disney would make a movie about
@vigilantcomicpenguin: If anyone here knows any movie producers, we need to pitch this idea for a rom-com. This could be big.
@Cudillera: Oh they see these convos. Someone has taken notes ;)
@NefariousSerendipity: Although they'll cast one asian and one black girl and one's gonna be a nerd and one's gonna be jock. Then the high school stereotypes will be emphasized. Then they'll cast by quota. Politically correct amirite? /s
@Music-Pixie: The dude the popular chick will either be white and rich or ethnically ambiguous. That's something that I've noticed in movies.
@Salieri: | Ethnic ambiguity is so a higher proportion of the audience find them relatable. It's marketing statistics unfortunately. |
@isnt_it_obvious_: Sweet story I guess but getting married and having a kid at 22/23??? To each their own but damn that's young. Obvs we don't know your circumstances, but I would love to be 22/23 again and just enjoy my life with my SO.
@Salieri: | I'm 22 and I'd love to be married to my SO and expect a child. Instead I got stress, cheap student food and my own tears |
@isnt_it_obvious_: Sweet story I guess but getting married and having a kid at 22/23??? To each their own but damn that's young. Obvs we don't know your circumstances, but I would love to be 22/23 again and just enjoy my life with my SO.
@Salieri: | Yeah my wife and I are in our late 20s, make close to six figures, and don’t even remotely feel like we could afford or take care of kids. I’ll never understand how people five or even ten years our junior are like “Yup we can totally afford this and are ready to have a completely different life” |
@isnt_it_obvious_: Sweet story I guess but getting married and having a kid at 22/23??? To each their own but damn that's young. Obvs we don't know your circumstances, but I would love to be 22/23 again and just enjoy my life with my SO.
@throwaway7783398: We know it’s certainly not the norm, at least in todays society, to start a family this young. However, we both know that we want a few children together and decided we’d rather have them young and enjoy our 50’s/60’s/so on together.o on together.
@Salieri: | Good for you guys! You don’t want to be 70 with kids just going off to college, just because it’s “the norm”. |
@Dragois: Congrats!!! Happy for the both of you.
If you graduated in 2015, then aren't u only around 23yo though?
@Salieri: | Yes, I’m 23. I was born in 97. |
@rhakac22: This is perhaps the greatest love story I’ve ever heard. As others have said, I really hope someone in Hollywood sees this because it needs to be turned into a script pronto.
On another note, I have a strange question. When you two got married, how did the last name situation work? It’s something I’ve always wondered about same sex marriages. I’ve noticed some couples combine their last names, others keep it the way it is, and I’ve even seen one couple create a totally new last name that they both took. How did you guys go about it and if you don’t mind me asking what is the reasoning behind it?
Congrats again and best of luck with the baby girl!
@Salieri: | She took my last name. As for the reasoning, she simply wanted to and I was honored by that. |
@kohavdey: Wait, u are lesbians. How are u expecting a daughter, if not adopted?
@throwaway7783398: We used a process called reciprocal IVF. My eggs were fertilized by a donors sperm and the embryo was inserted into my wife’s uterus. My bun, her oven.
@Salieri: | My eggs were fertilized by a donors sperm and the embryo was inserted into my wife’s uterus.
Woah, that's neat. Never heard of that before. I like how it's made to involve both of you in the process (plus the donor) I think that's really good. Did you get to choose the donor or did you just spin the wheel? |
@kohavdey: Wait, u are lesbians. How are u expecting a daughter, if not adopted?
@throwaway7783398: We used a process called reciprocal IVF. My eggs were fertilized by a donors sperm and the embryo was inserted into my wife’s uterus. My bun, her oven.
@Salieri: | Damn, that’s really cool! I wonder how expensive it is lol |
@kohavdey: Wait, u are lesbians. How are u expecting a daughter, if not adopted?
@throwaway7783398: We used a process called reciprocal IVF. My eggs were fertilized by a donors sperm and the embryo was inserted into my wife’s uterus. My bun, her oven.
@Salieri: | Damn, didn't know about that!! Really innovative. All the best wishes for your upcoming child!! |
@kohavdey: Wait, u are lesbians. How are u expecting a daughter, if not adopted?
@throwaway7783398: We used a process called reciprocal IVF. My eggs were fertilized by a donors sperm and the embryo was inserted into my wife’s uterus. My bun, her oven.
@NefariousSerendipity: Do you have the bio dad's information or does the bank keep them classified?
@Salieri: | plot twist, it's her wife's ex playing the long con |
@ProteanPie: Ok I read the title and then the first sentence and was like "this filthy bitch over here..."
@iGetHighPlayRS: I’m clearly having myself a case of the Monday’s.
@DeathByPolka: I believe you’d get your ass sneezed in saying something like that.
@Salieri: | Underrated Office Space comment. |
@ProteanPie: Ok I read the title and then the first sentence and was like "this filthy bitch over here..."
@iGetHighPlayRS: I’m clearly having myself a case of the Monday’s.
@DeathByPolka: I believe you’d get your ass sneezed in saying something like that.
@Salieri: | I'll tell you what I'd do, man. 2 cheeks at the same time. |
@ProteanPie: Ok I read the title and then the first sentence and was like "this filthy bitch over here..."
@iGetHighPlayRS: I’m clearly having myself a case of the Monday’s.
@Salieri: | At least you didnt get your asshole sneezed in |
@ProteanPie: Ok I read the title and then the first sentence and was like "this filthy bitch over here..."
@iGetHighPlayRS: I’m clearly having myself a case of the Monday’s.
@Salieri: | Ngl, I clicked on this story because the title was so crazy I thought to myself, “this has to be a good story.” |
@ProteanPie: Ok I read the title and then the first sentence and was like "this filthy bitch over here..."
@iGetHighPlayRS: I’m clearly having myself a case of the Monday’s.
@Salieri: | Where are those TPS reports? |
@ProteanPie: Ok I read the title and then the first sentence and was like "this filthy bitch over here..."
@iGetHighPlayRS: I’m clearly having myself a case of the Monday’s.
@Salieri: | Go grind some RC, you’ll feel better. |
@ProteanPie: Ok I read the title and then the first sentence and was like "this filthy bitch over here..."
@DoubleTapSkinFlap: I was wondering what sorta crazy fetish involves dogs sneezing into buttholes. I almost googled it...
@Salieri: | And a new fetish is born. |
@ProteanPie: Ok I read the title and then the first sentence and was like "this filthy bitch over here..."
@DoubleTapSkinFlap: I was wondering what sorta crazy fetish involves dogs sneezing into buttholes. I almost googled it...
@Salieri: | Whitney Wisconsin has entered the chat |
@ProteanPie: Ok I read the title and then the first sentence and was like "this filthy bitch over here..."
@Salieri: | Well I felt her little cold nose on my cheek
THAT cheek?? |
@Bingalingbean123: Your title is much funnier.
@iGetHighPlayRS: Omg how do I change that, it won’t let me change it???
@Salieri: | I was both disappointed and amused when I realized halfway through that it was your face cheek, not your butt cheek you were mentioning, and it was your ear and not your exit ramp that was sneezed in. |
@Bingalingbean123: Your title is much funnier.
@iGetHighPlayRS: Omg how do I change that, it won’t let me change it???
@Salieri: | “I felt her cold little nose on my cheek” I had a different cheek in mind. This is hilarious |
@Bingalingbean123: Your title is much funnier.
@iGetHighPlayRS: Omg how do I change that, it won’t let me change it???
@hmm_yes_: I've attempted to edit titles before. Unfortunately, I don't think you can.
I hope this gets on the front page. The title makes it funnier
@Salieri: | You definitely can’t. It’s a site wide Reddit rule. I suppose it’s to keep a post from getting onto the front page where everyone will see it, and then changing it for marketing purposes, or some other malicious action. |
@Bingalingbean123: Your title is much funnier.
@iGetHighPlayRS: Omg how do I change that, it won’t let me change it???
@Salieri: | I can’t stop giggling! |
@Bingalingbean123: Your title is much funnier.
@iGetHighPlayRS: Omg how do I change that, it won’t let me change it???
@Salieri: | Yes it was unintentional please don't give me all this karma. |
@Bingalingbean123: Your title is much funnier.
@KennyVic_: This title is the best thing that's happened on this sub in awhile
@Salieri: | What really makes it is how it starts off with the dog putting her nose on the owners cheek lol |
@Bingalingbean123: Your title is much funnier.
@Salieri: | Omg it's great!!! |
@blackcatsblackbats: I was asking myself how exactly can a dog sneeze into an asshole...... this made my day!!
@Salieri: | Glad I could help |
@Candy_Cake_Jen: I was about to ask why you would let your dog near that area... then I read the full story. I suggest a slightly damp soft cloth and GENTLY wash your ear
@iGetHighPlayRS: Well now I have bigger problems.... like Reddit thinking I let my dog do weird things to me.
Plot twist: I don’t.
@Candy_Cake_Jen: Auto text happens, dont worry. Also I was serious about the gentle ear cleaning...
@JawBreaker00: Ear infections are painful
@Salieri: | Truth! |
@Candy_Cake_Jen: I was about to ask why you would let your dog near that area... then I read the full story. I suggest a slightly damp soft cloth and GENTLY wash your ear
@Salieri: | Sometimes when I bend down to pick something up or clean something off the floor I get a bit of buttcrack going and my dog will lick it. So i can understand how its possible |
@lyfe_choices: I'm sorry your day is kinda crap, but you just made me laugh until I cried at my desk. Currently posting through watery vision, I'm dying here. Thank you!
@Salieri: | I haven't laughed like that in a long time. |