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[ "Initial ShotBow integration has been completed with Ranks being transferred, the SpawnCannon updated, and chat colors. ", "We understand some people are still working out their rank issues. ", "We ask that you email [email protected] with a descriptive explanation and we appreciate your patience in a response.", "\n\nwith a descriptive explanation and we appreciate your patience in a response. ", "Updated armor and potion restrictions on the website.", "\n\nFiltered more admins from Leaderboards.", "\n\nMore Infinite Dispensers fixes.", "\n\nChanged spawn cannon limits based on new ShotBow rank:\n\nNew Illegal Nether Portal detection and correction!", "\n\nThis plugin will go live at 8:00 PM on Tuesday September 10th! ", "Be prepared!", "\n\nSince Mojang doesn't seem interested in fixing a major SMP bug... we decided we needed to take it into our own hands. ", "There will be illegal nether portal detection and correction going forward.", "\n\nTo make a proper portal there should be a 2 x 3 area of air on each side of an active Nether portal as shown here. ", "If there is not the blocks will be automatically removed when someone enters or exits the portal and a warning will be sent to you in chat." ]

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[ "Hogan engaged in the retail politicking he relishes, while Jealous campaigned with celebrity star power built through his national connections and experience as a civil rights organizer.", "\n\nAD\n\nComedian Dave Chappelle, who grew up in Silver Spring and has known Jealous since they were children, joined him for a rally in Baltimore County and for door-to-door canvassing in Prince George’s County, a Democratic stronghold.", "\n\nWhen Hermoine Charleron opened the door of her Mitchellville townhouse Sunday to find the comedian on the stoop, she screamed: “Oh my gosh, it’s Dave Chappelle!”", "\n\nAD\n\n“Do you know why I’m here?” ", "the comedian asked. “", "I’m here for my godbrother, Ben Jealous.”", "\n\nCharleron said she had not been following the campaign and did not know about Jealous. “", "Is he a Democrat?” ", "she asked.", "\n\n“Absolutely,” Chappelle said. “", "He’s been endorsed by everybody from President Obama to Bernie Sanders. ", "He’s a former NAACP president. ", "A Rhodes Scholar.”", "\n\nAD\n\nHogan, ahead in the polls and aiming to become deep-blue Maryland’s second GOP governor to win a second term, told supporters on the Eastern Shore on Saturday that most people like the direction of the state under his leadership.", "\n\n“It’s really pretty simple. ", "If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it,” he bellowed hoarsely to a crowd of hundreds gathered in Grasonville, a few miles from the Bay Bridge.", "\n\nThe governor drew rousing cheers when he mentioned two of his signature accomplishments: averting tax increases and lowering the tolls across the bridge. ", "Hogan has promised voters a second term would feature more tax relief and economic prosperity. (", "His record is mixed on similar promises from four years ago.)", "\n\nJealous, who would be Maryland’s first African American governor, held a rally in Baltimore County’s Gwynn Oak Park, where because of segregation laws his mother was not allowed to play as a child.", "\n\nAD\n\nAD\n\n“We can make history in obvious ways,” Jealous told a diverse crowd of several hundred people.", "\n\nBut he urged his supporters to envision other potential milestones as well, including universal health insurance, eliminating the achievement gap in public schools and addressing disparities in state government contracting for companies owned by women and people of color.", "\n\nOn Sunday night, Chappelle walked more than two blocks in a targeted Democratic neighborhood, knocking on about a dozen doors, carrying one woman’s groceries and talking to residents who were walking their dogs or parking their cars.", "\n\nPeople swarmed around to pose for pictures. ", "Most told Chappelle that they’d already voted for Jealous. ", "Others assured him that they would go to the polls Tuesday and do so.", "\n\nAD\n\n“Let people know we’re going to do this thing,” said Chappelle, who carried lawn signs and asked homeowners if he could plant them in their yards.", "\n\nHogan has led Jealous by an average of 18 percentage points in polls, but most independent political observers — along with elected officials on both sides of the aisle — say they expect a closer race, in part because of widespread frustration among Democrats with President Trump.", "\n\nAD\n\n“He might win by double digits, but not by 20 points,” said Todd Eberly, a political science professor at St. Mary’s College. “", "It’s a heavily Democratic state, and people are very unhappy with the president.”", "\n\nWhile some Democratic leaders have been slow to rally around their nominee, many spent the weekend working with him and trying to boost turnout. ", "Sens. ", "Benjamin L. Cardin and Chris Van Hollen and Rep. John Sarbanes joined the Gwynn Oak Park rally, where they called on those who had already voted to encourage their neighbors and friends to do the same.", "\n\nRep. Elijah E. Cummings and Angela Alsobrooks, the Democratic nominee for Prince George’s County executive, attended church with Jealous on Sunday.", "\n\nEarly voting turnout smashed records in Maryland and across the country, though experts say it’s difficult to predict whether that signals greater turnout on Election Day or simply demonstrates heightened popularity of early voting overall.", "\n\nAD\n\nAD\n\nThe answer will be key to whether Jealous’s underfunded and insurgent campaign could topple one of the Maryland’s most popular politicians.", "\n\nDemocrats eager to see a Trump-fueled “blue wave” are counting on infrequent voters to show up in record numbers for Jealous, potentially thwarting the cross-party appeal Hogan has developed with moderates. ", "Roughly a third of Maryland’s Democratic voters have told pollsters they plan to cross party lines to support Hogan.", "\n\nOn Saturday, Hogan thanked Republicans, but made a special point to single out the “Democrats for Hogan” T-shirts in the crowd, saying, “You’re going to put us over the top.”", "\n\nJealous supporters are optimistic that first-time and sporadic voters will materialize on Election Day. ", "The Jealous campaign says its goal is to draw 1 million Democratic voters to the polls.", "\n\nThey’re banking on people like Esau Santamaria, 25, of Wheaton, who has never voted before and was pumped up after attending his first political rally in Baltimore County on Saturday with his girlfriend, Irene Bonilla.", "\n\nAD\n\nAD\n\nBonilla, a Jealous volunteer, helped Santamaria register earlier this year, and she organized a group to attend the rally.", "\n\n“She keeps telling me to go vote,” he said, adding that he never thought his vote mattered. ", "He said he left the rally energized and plans to vote Tuesday for Jealous.", "\n\nHogan chatted Sunday with voters in a Baltimore County bagel shop and worked the crowds tailgating at the Baltimore Ravens-Pittsburgh Steelers football game.", "\n\nRep. Jamie Raskin (D-Md.) is among the supporters predicting Jealous will defy the polls. ", "He said he is basing his prediction in part on the “2,000 people” he saw lined up to vote in Silver Spring during early voting.", "\n\nAD\n\n“When you saw that line . . . ", "I said, ‘We’re going to win, Ben Jealous is going to take this,’ ” Raskin declared as he revved up volunteers before they went out to knock on doors in Montgomery County.", "\n\nHogan warned his supporters not to be complacent.", "\n\n“There’s only one poll that counts, and that’s the one they take next Tuesday,” the governor said. “", "It matters about who shows up. ", "So I would encourage you to not take anything for granted.”" ]

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[ "Introduction\n============\n\nSevere burns that cover a large total body surface area result in serious risks to the patient in terms of morbidity and mortality, and in most cases should be treated in a specialized burns unit ([@b1-br-0-0-635]). ", "Modern treatments for severe burns include skin replacement therapy using biomaterials or grafts, prevention of infection using antibiotics and sterile conditions, treatment of sepsis, and targeted protein therapies ([@b2-br-0-0-635],[@b3-br-0-0-635]). ", "In addition to the pain and tissue damage caused by severe burns, the process of recovery can cause problems resulting from the high requirement of the body for energy and proteins. ", "Patients with severe burns experience an initial ebb phase over the first two days post-burn, where metabolism decreases. ", "A period of flow occurs during hypermetabolism that can last for many months post-burn ([@b4-br-0-0-635]). ", "This process involves multiple factors; plasma catecholamines, cortisol and inflammatory cells are elevated, leading to whole-body catabolism, elevated resting energy expenditure and multi-organ dysfunction ([@b4-br-0-0-635]). ", "If this process is left unchecked it can prevent a patient\\'s full rehabilitation and delay wound healing ([@b5-br-0-0-635]). ", "Modulation of the response by early treatment, thermoregulation, early and continuous enteral feeding with high protein-high carbohydrate diets and pharmacologic treatments markedly decrease morbidity ([@b4-br-0-0-635]). ", "Pharmacologic treatments include anabolic agents, β-adrenergic receptor antagonists and anti-hyperglycemic agents ([@b6-br-0-0-635]).", "\n\nOne of the pharmacologic treatments used to treat severe burns involves recombinant human growth hormone (rhGH). ", "Growth hormone (GH) is an important anabolic hormone that has multiple physiological functions. ", "Human GH is composed of 191 amino acid residues and is secreted by the pituitary gland for anabolism, to promote the growth of different tissues. ", "Since the 1950s, purified bovine and human GH has been administered to patients during clinical practice, but these are limited sources of GH, and there have been some concerns about contamination ([@b7-br-0-0-635]). ", "With the emergence of synthetic rhGH produced commercially in bacteria, GH is now more widely used in clinical therapeutic strategies ([@b7-br-0-0-635]). ", "For children, GH can be used to provide catch-up growth treatment in children born small for their gestational age ([@b8-br-0-0-635]). ", "At present, GH is widely used for many different therapies including GH replacement, severe brain trauma, and wound healing ([@b9-br-0-0-635]--[@b11-br-0-0-635]). ", "Since most severely burned patients have an associated dysfunction in protein synthesis, rhGH can promote protein utilization and synthesis, and its curative effects have been widely recognized by clinicians. ", "In addition, rhGH has also been recommended in the nutritional supporting guideline for burn patients in China ([@b12-br-0-0-635]), and a recent Cochrane review suggested that there was some evidence the rhGH could result in more rapid healing of severe burns ([@b13-br-0-0-635]).", "\n\nThe commercially available forms of rhGH include freeze-dried powders, but recently liquid formulas are available, with similar pharmacokinetic and safety profiles to the powdered form ([@b14-br-0-0-635],[@b15-br-0-0-635]). ", "A liquid form of rhGH may have advantages in terms of there being no need to reconstitute the powder, and so the risk of dilution or contamination problems may be decreased ([@b14-br-0-0-635]), in addition powdered rhGH may undergo aggregation during reconstitution resulting in misfolded protein ([@b16-br-0-0-635]). ", "Therefore, liquid rhGH may be more biologically active, faster acting, more convenient to use and more effective ([@b17-br-0-0-635]) than the powdered form. ", "However, few previous studies have compared the clinical effects of both forms of rhGH, and for burn patients, it is unclear which form is most beneficial. ", "We hypothesized that liquid rhGH may be beneficial to patients with severe burns when compared to the powdered form. ", "Thus the aim of the present study was to evaluate the effects of liquid and powder rhGH in improving visceral protein synthesis in severely burned patients, and to provide evidence for the rational use of rhGH in burns patients.", "\n\nMaterials and methods\n=====================\n\nThe present randomized controlled trial was approved by the Medical Ethics Committee of the Second Affiliated Hospital of Zhejiang University School of Medicine and informed consent was obtained from all patients.", "\n\n### Study inclusion and exclusion criteria\n\nThe inclusion criteria for the present study were as follows: i) Patient was between 18--65 years-old; ii) total burn area ≥20% total body surface area (TBSA) classed as a major burn that requires nutritional therapy ([@b18-br-0-0-635]), of which the deep burn degree II and III area was ≥1% TBSA; iii) the patient was admitted to hospital within 1 week following burn injury; and iv) the patient agreed to participate in the current study. ", "The exclusion criteria were as follows: i) Patient aged \\<18 years or \\>65 years; ii) burn area \\<20% TBSA; iii) superficial second degree burn patients; iv) complicating factors such as unstable glycemic control in diabetic patients, those with malignant tumors, and those with a brain injury; v) pregnancy or lactation; and ([@b5-br-0-0-635]) a life expectancy of \\<15 days. ", "The elimination criteria of patients enrolled on the trial were as follows: i) Those receiving a therapeutic dosage not consistent with that of our study protocol; ii) those not completing a 10 day rhGH treatment.", "\n\n### Patient grouping and treatments\n\nBetween February 2009 and November 2011, 63 patients eligible for inclusion in the current study were treated in the Burns Department of the Second Affiliated Hospital of Zhejiang University School of Medicine, Hangzhou, China. ", "Of these, 34 patients were not enrolled, including 19 cases of refusal of patient consent to participate in the research, six patients who did not complete treatment, five cases with life expectancy of \\<15 days, one case with a cerebral vascular accident, and three cases of diabetes with unstable glycemic control. ", "Finally, a total of 29 patients were enrolled in the present study ([Fig. ", "1](#f1-br-0-0-635){ref-type=\"fig\"}). ", "All enrolled patients completed the study, without any cases being eliminated following their inclusion. ", "At \\~1 week following burn injury, the patients were randomly assigned by block randomization method (with each block containing 4 cases) to either the liquid rhGH group (15 cases) or powder rhGH group (14 cases). ", "We defined burn index (BI) as the sum of full thickness (III degree) burn area, 2/3 deep partial thickness (II degree) burn area and 1/2 superficial partial thickness burn area.", "\n\nThe two patient groups were given routine fluid resuscitation, anti-infective treatment, wound management, and nutritional supports. ", "The patients\\' heat supply was calculated according to the heat supply equation for burns provided by the Third Military Medical University ([@b19-br-0-0-635]). ", "From the 5--7th day after burn injury, rhGH was administered (subcutaneously injected at 7 a.m.) once daily for 10 days. ", "For the liquid rhGH group, liquid rhGH (batch number 081001, 081205, 090702, 20101202 and 20101204; GeneScience Pharmaceuticals Co., Ltd., Changchun, China) was used while for the powder rhGH group, powder rhGH (batch nos. ", "080902, 081102, 090702, 20100102 and 20100605; Shanghai United Cell Biotechnology Co., Ltd., Shanghai, China) was used. ", "Both groups were the same in the initial timing of drug administration, dosage (0.067 mg/kg/d, depending on the patient\\'s specific conditions) and course of treatment. ", "When the patient\\'s blood glucose level was \\>10 mmol/l, a routine dosage of insulin was pumped using micropump to control the blood glucose level under the target of 10 mmol/l.\n\n### Observational indexes\n\nAt 6 a.m., prior to rhGH injection and on days 3, 5 and 10 of rhGH injection, 3 ml fasting venous blood were drawn and sent to the clinical laboratory for examination of pre-albumin (PALB). ", "In addition C-reactive protein (CRP) and fasting blood glucose levels were examined at baseline and on days 5 and 10. ", "PALB and CRP were detected by an AU 5400 chemistry analyzer (Beckman Coulter, Inc., Brea, CA, USA) through immunoturbidimetry.", "\n\nIn the morning, prior to rhGH injection, and on days 5 and 10 of rhGH injection, when the dressings were changed, the patient was weighed without burn dressings and topical treatments. ", "Additionally, the patient\\'s liver and renal functions \\[alanine aminotransferase (ALT) and blood urea nitrogen (BUN)\\] were also detected before rhGH injection and on day 10 of rhGH injection. ", "Based on the reference range of our hospital during the testing period, we defined serum ALT \\>50 U/l and BUN \\>7.2 mmol/l as abnormal.", "\n\nThe wound healing time was recorded as the time from the burn occurrence until the residual burn area \\<1% TBSA or on the 5th day following the last skin graft.", "\n\n### Statistical analysis\n\nAll statistical analyses were conducted using SPSS version 17.0 (SPSS Inc., Chicago, IL, USA). ", "The data in the present study were expressed as median (min, max), and compared using Mann-Whitney U test for independent samples. ", "Count data were analyzed by Fisher\\'s exact test. ", "P\\<0.05 was considered to indicate a statistically significant difference.", "\n\nResults\n=======\n\n### Baseline characteristics\n\nThere was no significant difference in the median values of general characteristics such as gender, age, deep II degree burn area, deep III degree burn area and BI between the 15 subjects in the liquid rhGH and the 14 subjects in the powder rhGH groups (all P\\>0.05), except for body weight (P=0.046), as shown in [Table I](#tI-br-0-0-635){ref-type=\"table\"}.", "\n\n### PALB level\n\nOver the 10 days of observation, PALB levels rose in both groups after treatment, as shown in [Table II](#tII-br-0-0-635){ref-type=\"table\"}. ", "Following an initial fall of 3.1 (−55.5,60) mg/l on day 3 in the powder rhGH group compared to an increase of 16.5 (−15.9,120) mg/l in the liquid rhGH group both increased on day 5 by 24.5 (−265.4,107.6) mg/l in the powder rhGH group and 42.7 (−30.6,123.2) mg/l in the liquid group compared to baseline, and further increased by 65 (−259.3,122) mg/l in the powder rhGH group and 88 (−41.7,23.5) mg/l in the liquid rhGH group. ", "Although the levels were not statistically different between the groups, the differences from baseline were significant on day 10 (P=0.046).", "\n\n### CRP, fasting blood glucose level and body weight\n\nThe CRP levels fell in both groups after treatment ([Table III](#tIII-br-0-0-635){ref-type=\"table\"}). ", "However, the levels and the change from baseline did not reveal any significant differences between the groups (all P\\>0.05). ", "The fasting blood glucose levels also fell in both groups following treatment, but not significantly from baseline, nor between groups (all P\\>0.05; [Table III](#tIII-br-0-0-635){ref-type=\"table\"}). ", "Body weight was significantly lower in the liquid rhGH group compared to the powder rhGH group before treatment, and on days 5 and 10 (P=0.046, P=0.018 and P=0.006, respectively). ", "However, the weight change from before treatment was not significantly different between the 2 groups (day 5 difference, P=0.591; day 10 difference, P=0.400; [Table III](#tIII-br-0-0-635){ref-type=\"table\"}).", "\n\n### Liver and renal function indexes\n\nAmong the 15 cases in the liquid rhGH group, there were 7 cases of liver dysfunction prior to treatment and 6 following treatment; by contrast, among the 14 cases of powder rhGH group, there were 6 cases of liver dysfunction prior to treatment and 7 following treatment as shown in [Table IV](#tIV-br-0-0-635){ref-type=\"table\"}. ", "The comparison of liver dysfunction between the 2 groups before and after treatment did not demonstrate any significant difference (both P\\>0.05). ", "All 15 cases in the liquid rhGH group had abnormal renal function prior to and following treatment; for the 14 cases in the powder rhGH group, 14 had abnormal renal function prior to treatment and 13 following treatment, as shown in [Table IV](#tIV-br-0-0-635){ref-type=\"table\"}.", "\n\n### Wound healing time\n\nWould healing time was 38.0 (19.0, 48.0) days in the liquid rhGH group and 30.5 (15.0, 60.0) days in the powder rhGH group, without any significant difference observed (P=0.270) ([Fig. ", "2](#f2-br-0-0-635){ref-type=\"fig\"}).", "\n\nDiscussion\n==========\n\nClinically rhGH reduces hypercatabolism following burn injuries, speeding up protein synthesis, improving negative nitrogen balance, promoting burn wound and skin donor site healing, and shortens length of hospital stay, and its wide use in treating burn patients has been commonly recognized by physicians ([@b12-br-0-0-635],[@b13-br-0-0-635]). ", "Thus, rhGH is one of the options available for treatment of severe burns ([@b20-br-0-0-635]). ", "However, it is unclear which form of rhGH, liquid or powder, has better effects in patients with severe burns. ", "Despite the evidence that confirm the effects of powder rhGH on burned patients ([@b21-br-0-0-635]). ", "Hence the present study evaluated the clinical effects of both liquid and powder forms of rhGH on burned patients who needed nutritional support.", "\n\nSerum albumin, PALB and transferrin are directly linked to nutritional status and have been regarded as traditional indexes for evaluating nutritional status as well as nutritional therapeutic effects ([@b22-br-0-0-635]). ", "However, these indexes are negatively associated with inflammation and stress level. ", "Albumin has a half-life up to 20 days, but is poorly sensitive for short-term nutritional evaluation and predisposed to exogenous protein input ([@b22-br-0-0-635]). ", "Thus, the present study aimed to observe the short-term effects of rhGH, and albumin was not used as one of evaluation indexes. ", "Instead, PALB with half-life of 48 h was the main observational index since it is more sensitive to the change of nutritional status ([@b22-br-0-0-635]). ", "Statistically, when comparing between 2 groups, PALB change is more sensitive than the raw data of different points ([@b21-br-0-0-635]). ", "In the present study, liquid rhGH took less time and was better at improving PALB levels compared with powdered rhGH, supporting the suggestion that rehydration of powdered rhGH may risk causing protein aggregation ([@b16-br-0-0-635]), resulting in a lower ratio of biologically active protein than those that have been stored in solution. ", "The two groups were given the same dosage of rhGH calculated according to mg/kg/d, however, the liquid rhGH was actually more potent. ", "In other words, the liquid rhGH was more clinically biologically active and more effective. ", "This may be seen as contradictory to previous studies that found liquid and powdered rhGH to be bioequivalent ([@b14-br-0-0-635],[@b15-br-0-0-635]). ", "But those studies were more concerned with pharmacokinetics and not the levels of PALB. ", "In addition, since the changes of inflammatory and stress indexes such as CRP and blood glucose levels did not differ significantly between the two groups, the results of the present study suggest that inflammation and stress levels were not different in the two groups and so should not have influenced the detection of PALB.", "\n\nOne factor that may be considered to be less beneficial is the significantly lower total body weight in the patients receiving liquid rhGH; however, this difference was clear before treatment started and the loss in body weight from baseline was not significant between the two groups. ", "As the issue of hypermetabolism lasts several months after the occurrence of the severe burn, overall the body weight measurements would have more value if they were investigated over a longer period of time as rhGH has been shown in children with severe burns to improve growth and body mass in studies that have lasted 12 months ([@b23-br-0-0-635],[@b24-br-0-0-635]). ", "It would have been interesting to observe any significant difference between the groups after many months.", "\n\nTheoretically, since liquid rhGH is more spatially stable and biologically active, it should be more effective in promoting wound healing than powdered rhGH. ", "As studies have indicated that rhGH promotes wound healing including speeding up burn wound and skin graft donor/recipient site healing, compared to placebo for the control group ([@b13-br-0-0-635],[@b21-br-0-0-635]). ", "Nevertheless, the results of the present study showed no significant difference in wound healing time between the two groups, and did not confirm the advantages of rhGH injection in promoting wound healing. ", "This may be due to the small sample size, as both groups were receiving the benefit of rhGH, but if in the case of the powdered form there was slightly less benefit, the differences may have been too small to see in a study of this kind.", "\n\nThe present study has some limitations. ", "A limited number of cases were included, and some of the indexes especially wound healing time were not significantly different between the two groups. ", "After a comprehensive analysis of our data, we primarily draw on the conclusion that rhGH injection is faster acting and more effective in improving the nutritional status of burn patients, but it still should be supported by a large-sample, multicenter clinical trial in the future.", "\n\nIn conclusion, the liquid form of rhGH may be more beneficial to patients with severe burns requiring nutritional support than the powdered form.", "\n\nThe present study was supported by special clinical research fund of Zhejiang Medical Association (grant no. ", "2008ZYC13).", "\n\n{#f1-br-0-0-635}\n\n{#f2-br-0-0-635}\n\n###### \n\nBaseline characteristics of severe burn patients treated with powder or liquid forms of rhGH.", "\n\n Powdered rhGH (n=14) Liquid rhGH (n=15) P-value\n ---------------------------------------- ---------------------- -------------------- ---------\n Gender (male/female) 14/0 13/2 0.480\n Age (years) 42 (25--64) 41(20--64) 0.813\n Body weight (kg) 72.25 (62.5--89) 69 (47--115) 0.046\n Deep second degree burn area (TBSA), % 9 (0--35) 19 (1--61) 0.290\n Third degree burn area (TBSA), % 0 (0--32) 3 (0--45) 0.377\n BI 26.7 (14.8--56.8) 37.5 (12.0--53.3) 0.290\n\nrhGH, recombinant human growth hormone; TBSA, total burn surface area; BI, burn index. ", "Data are presented as median (min, max) or proportion.", "\n\n###### \n\nSerum pre-albumin (PALB) in severe burn patients treated with powder or liquid forms of recombinant human growth factor (rhGH).", "\n\n Baseline Day 3 Day 5 Day 10 Δ1 Δ2 Δ3\n ----------------------------------------------------- ----------------- --------------- ------------------- -------------- ------------------ --------------------- -----------------\n PALB (mg/l) \n Powder rhGH 81.8 (55.4,364) 92.6 (41,311) 111.25 (67.2,189) 145 (73,227) −3.1 (−55.5,60) 24.5 (−265.4,107.6) 65 (−259.3,122)\n Liquid rhGH 72.5 (44.2,163) 89.5 (58,283) 97 (42.4,284) 139 (53,336) 16.5 (−15.9,120) 42.7 (−30.6,123.2) 88 (−41.7,235)\n P-value^[a](#tfn3-br-0-0-635){ref-type=\"table-fn\"}^ 0.077 0.880 0.591 0.505 0.063 0.477 0.046\n\nΔ1 = value (day 3) - value (baseline), Δ2 = value (day 5) - value (baseline), Δ3 = value (day 10) - value (baseline). ", "Data are presented as median (min, max).", "\n\nPowder rhGH vs. liquid rhGH.", "\n\n###### \n\nClinical variables in severe burn patients treated with powder or liquid forms of rhGH.", "\n\n Variable Baseline Day 5 Day 10 Δ1 Δ2\n ------------------------------------------------------- ------------------ ----------------- ------------------- ------------------ ----------------------\n CRP (mg/l) \n   Powder rhGH 133.5 (61, 175) 103 (21.8, 217) 57.75 (17.9, 147) −46 (−88, 155.8) −58.5 (−133.7, 85.8)\n   Liquid rhGH 156 (39, 266) 102 (5.2, 276) 56.5 (1.9, 217) −42 (−125, 21) −91 (−218.6, 134)\n   P-value^[a](#tfn5-br-0-0-635){ref-type=\"table-fn\"}^ 0.201 0.880 0.914 0.715 0.400\n FPG (mmol/l) \n   Powder rhGH 146.5 (101, 245) 123 (67, 217) 115 (71, 228) −24 (−76, 44) −10.5 (−137, 99)\n   Liquid rhGH 137 (81, 255) 143 (60, 312) 110 (60, 333) 18 (−181, 151) −30 (−132, 194)\n   P-value^[a](#tfn5-br-0-0-635){ref-type=\"table-fn\"}^ 0.377 0.477 0.561 0.093 0.715\n BW (kg) \n   Powder rhGH 75.25 (63, 89) 71.5 (59, 91) 71.5 (61, 87) −1.25 (−7, 4) −2.25 (−9, 6)\n   Liquid rhGH 69 (47, 115) 66 (51, 105.5) 65 (48, 89) −3 (−10, 4.5) −3.5 (−26, 4)\n   P-value^[a](#tfn5-br-0-0-635){ref-type=\"table-fn\"}^ 0.046 0.018 0.006 0.591 0.400\n\nΔ1 = value (day 5) - value (baseline), Δ2 = value (day 10) - value (baseline). ", "Data are presented as median (min, max).", "\n\nPowder rhGH vs. liquid rhGH. ", "CRP, C-reactive protein; FPG, fasting plasma glucose; BW, body weight; rhGH, recombinant human growth hormone.", "\n\n###### \n\nLiver and kidney function in severe burn patients, treated with powdered or liquid forms of rhGH.", "\n\n Baseline Day 10 \n ------------------------ ---------- ---------- ------- ----------- ---------- -------\n Liver function, n (%) \n   Normal 8 (53.3) 8 (57.1) 1.000 7 (50.0) 9 (60.0) 0.715\n   Abnormal 6 (46.7) 7 (42.9) 7 (50.0) 6 (40.0) \n Kidney function, n (%) \n   Normal 0 0 -- 1 (7.1) 0 0.483\n   Abnormal 14 (100) 15 (100) 13 (92.9) 15 (100) \n\nSerum ALT \\>50 U/l and BUN \\>7.2 mmol/l was defined as abnormal. ", "rhGH, recombinant human growth hormone.", "\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "PubMed Central" }

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[ "Q:\n\nConcat columns using “with()” function in Laravel Eloquent\n\nI'm trying to concat two columns from different tables into one single column.", "\n$user = User::with(array('Person'=>function($query){\n $query->selectRaw('CONCAT(prefix_person.name, \" - \", prefix_user.code) as name, prefix_user.id');\n}))->lists('name', 'id');\n\nIn my person class I have this method:\npublic function User()\n{\n return $this->hasOne('User');\n}\n\nAnd in my user class I have this one:\npublic function Person()\n{\n return $this->belongsTo('Person', 'person_id');\n}\n\nI get the following error:\nSQLSTATE[42S22]: Column not found: 1054 Unknown column 'name' in 'field list' (SQL: select `name`, `id` from `prefix_user`)\n\nWhen I tried\n$user = User::with(array('Person'=>function($query){\n $query->selectRaw('CONCAT(prefix_person.name, \" - \", prefix_user.code) as name, prefix_user.id')->lists('name', 'id');\n}));\n\nI got this error:\n\nI have used the selectRaw a couple of times, but never needed it into a with (join).", "\n\nA:\n\nThe issue is that Eloquent will first query the users table, and only after, the persons table, so one query is not aware of the other and thus concatenating will not work.", "\nYou can use the Query Builder to do this using a join. ", "It will be something like it:\n$user = DB::table('users as u')\n ->join('persons as p', 'p.id', '=', 'u.person_id')\n ->selectRaw('CONCAT(p.name, \" - \", u.code) as concatname, u.id')\n ->lists('concatname', 'u.id');\n\nEDIT:\nAnd, as suggested by @michel-ayres comment, as long as you have an acessor to the field:\npublic function getFullNameAttribute() { \n return $this->attributes['name'] . ' - ' . ", "$this->attributes['code'];\n}\n\nyou can use your own model to perform the join and listing:\nUser::join('person','person.id','=','user.person_id')\n ->select('person.name', 'user.code', 'user.id')\n ->get()\n ->lists('full_name', 'id');\n\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "StackExchange" }

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[ "const AkairoError = require('../../util/AkairoError');\nconst AkairoModule = require('../AkairoModule');\n\n/**\n * Represents an inhibitor.", "\n * @param {string} id - Inhibitor ID.", "\n * @param {InhibitorOptions} [options={}] - Options for the inhibitor.", "\n * @extends {AkairoModule}\n */\nclass Inhibitor extends AkairoModule {\n constructor(id, {\n category,\n reason = '',\n type = 'post',\n priority = 0\n } = {}) {\n super(id, { category });\n\n /**\n * Reason emitted when command is inhibited.", "\n * @type {string}\n */\n this.reason = reason;\n\n /**\n * The type of the inhibitor for when it should run.", "\n * @type {string}\n */\n this.type = type;\n\n /**\n * The priority of the inhibitor.", "\n * @type {number}\n */\n this.priority = priority;\n\n /**\n * The ID of this inhibitor.", "\n * @name Inhibitor#id\n * @type {string}\n */\n\n /**\n * The inhibitor handler.", "\n * @name Inhibitor#handler\n * @type {InhibitorHandler}\n */\n }\n\n /**\n * Checks if message should be blocked.", "\n * A return value of true will block the message.", "\n * If returning a Promise, a resolved value of true will block the message.", "\n * @abstract\n * @param {Message} message - Message being handled.", "\n * @param {Command} [command] - Command to check.", "\n * @returns {boolean|Promise<boolean>}\n */\n exec() {\n throw new AkairoError('NOT_IMPLEMENTED', this.constructor.name, 'exec');\n }\n\n /**\n * Reloads the inhibitor.", "\n * @method\n * @name Inhibitor#reload\n * @returns {Inhibitor}\n */\n\n /**\n * Removes the inhibitor.", "\n * @method\n * @name Inhibitor#remove\n * @returns {Inhibitor}\n */\n}\n\nmodule.exports = Inhibitor;\n\n/**\n * Options to use for inhibitor execution behavior.", "\n * Also includes properties from AkairoModuleOptions.", "\n * @typedef {AkairoModuleOptions} InhibitorOptions\n * @prop {string} [reason=''] - Reason emitted when command or message is blocked.", "\n * @prop {string} [type='post'] - Can be 'all' to run on all messages, 'pre' to run on messages not blocked by the built-in inhibitors, or 'post' to run on messages that are commands.", "\n * @prop {number} [priority=0] - Priority for the inhibitor for when more than one inhibitors block a message.", "\n * The inhibitor with the highest priority is the one that is used for the block reason.", "\n */\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "Github" }

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[ "\n932 A.2d 29 (2007)\nSTATE\nv.\nHARMON.", "\nSupreme Court of New Jersey.", "\nSeptember 7, 2007.", "\nPetition for certification Denied.", "\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "FreeLaw" }

[ 0.0007851151167415082, 0.0008809319115243852, 0.0007122643874026835, 0.0006162317004054785, 0.0019954426679760218 ]

[ "Preventive effects of Bifidobacterium- and Lactobacillus-fermented milk on the development of inflammatory bowel disease in senescence-accelerated mouse P1/Yit strain mice.", "\nWe recently discovered inflammatory bowel disease (IBD) in the ileum and cecum of SAMP1/Yit strain mice under specific pathogen-free (SPF) conditions. ", "To determine the effect of lactic acid bacteria (LAB - Bifidobacterium breve, Bifidobacterium bifidum and Lactobacillus acidophilus)-fermented milk on the prevention of IBD in SAMP1/Yit strain mice, we compared the disease severity on the intestinal inflammation among the group of mice fed saline, unfermented milk or LAB-fermented milk. ", "Three-week-old SAMP1/Yit strain mice (n = 72) were subdivided into three groups, that were fed saline, unfermented milk and LAB-fermented milk, respectively. ", "The diets were orally administered daily via a gastric tube. ", "When the mice reached 20 weeks of age, they were sacrificed and the IBD scores were compared among the three groups. ", "Administration of the LAB-fermented milk to SAMP1/Yit strain mice reduced histological injury score, compared with those in saline-treated or unfermented milk-treated SAMP1/Yit strain mice. ", "Ileal tissue weight and myeloperoxidase activity also reduced by treatment of LAB-fermented milk. ", "Moreover, the tissue contents of immunoglobulins such as IgG1 and IgG2a were lower in the inflammatory regions in the SAMP1/Yit strain group fed LAB-fermented milk than that fed saline and unfermented milk. ", "Cytokine-specific ELISA assays indicated the production of T-helper 1 cytokines such as interferon-gamma and tumor necrosis factor-alpha in the culture supernatants of MLN cells in the SAMP1/Yit strain group fed LAB-fermented milk was lower than those fed saline and unfermented milk. ", "On the contrary, the production of interleukin-10 in MLN cells increased by prevention with LAB-fermented milk. ", "LAB-fermented milk is beneficial for the treatment of murine IBD and this effect may be modulated through stabilization of the mucosal immunity by LAB." ]

{ "pile_set_name": "PubMed Abstracts" }

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[ "Q:\n\nDelay url ImageView load until view is on screen?", "\n\nI'm loading many images from a server, and can't hammer the server with all those requests at once. ", "I want to only load the images once they've scrolled into view on screen, similar to the Facebook iPhone app.", "\nAnybody know how to do this in Titanium?", "\nI think I've seen a clue in the Kitchen Sink / YQL demo: It appears that a table will provide this functionality to the ImageView. ", "Am going to test it...\n\nA:\n\nthe table will only load the images for the cells once the row is visible.", "\n\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "StackExchange" }

[ 0.0011512415949255228, 0.0008494961075484753, 0.0006684117834083736, 0.0006382898427546024, 0.0005722105270251632, 0.0006667728303000331, 0.0019954426679760218 ]

[ "266 F.3d 392 (6th Cir. ", "2001)\nABX Air, Inc., Plaintiff-Appellee/Cross-Appellant,v.Airline Professionals Association of the International Brotherhood of Teamsters, Local Union No. ", "1224, AFL-CIO, Defendant-Appellant/Cross-Appellee.", "\nNos. ", "99-4499, 99-4540\nUNITED STATES COURT OF APPEALS FOR THE SIXTH CIRCUIT\nArgued: May 3, 2001Decided and Filed: September 19, 2001\n\nAppeal from the United States District Court for the Southern District of Ohio at Cincinnati. ", " No. ", "97-00812, Sandra S. Beckwith, District Judge.", "\nE. Scott Smith, Sarah B. Pierce, FORD & HARRISON, Atlanta, Georgia, Scott A. Carroll, VORYS, SATER, SEYMOUR & PEASE, Cincinnati, Ohio, for Appellee.", "\nJohn R. Doll, Julie C. Ford, LOGOTHETIS, PENCE & DOLL, Dayton, Ohio, for Appellant.", "\nDaniel M. Katz, KATZ & RANZMAN, Washington, D.C., David K. Montgomery, KEATING, MUETHING & KLEKAMP, Cincinnati, Ohio, for Amici Curiae.", "\nBefore: SILER and GILMAN, Circuit Judges; DUGGAN, District Judge.*", "\nOPINION\nSILER, Circuit Judge.", "\n\n\n1\nDefendant, Airline Professionals Association of the International Brotherhood of Teamsters, Local Union No. ", "1224, AFL-CIO (\"Union\"), appeals the injunction entered by the district court on behalf of plaintiff, ABX Air, Inc. (\"ABX\"). ", "The Union argues that the district court lacked subject matter jurisdiction to issue an injunction because its members' concerted refusal to bid for open-flying time did not constitute an impermissible strike in aid of a minor dispute. ", "Rather, it asserts that its members' concerted action was in accord with the collective bargaining agreement (\"CBA\") and was not a strike action relating to the separate minor dispute over the CBA's three-days-off rule. ", "In its cross-appeal, ABX contends that the district court erred by denying it monetary damagesas a remedy for an illegal strike in aid of a minor dispute based on CSX Transp., ", "Inc. v. Marquar, 980 F.2d 359 (6th Cir. ", "1992).", "\n\n\n2\nWe AFFIRM the district court's factual finding that this case involves a minor dispute over the three-days-off rule andREVERSE its ruling that the concerted action of the crew members constituted a strike.", "\n\nI. BACKGROUND\n\n3\nABX, also known as Airborne Express, is a major air freight carrier. ", "In June 1997, ABX and the Union entered into a new CBA. ", "Under Article 13 of the agreement, crew members voluntarily bid for open-flying times, which are scheduled flights that have not been assigned as part of a crew member's monthly schedule, are open because of an employee's absence or an assignment change, or have not been bid upon. ", "Open-flying time is awarded to eligible senior crew members first. ", "If any flights remain, the company assigns junior crew members who are compensated at a higher rate of pay, a practice called junior-manning.", "\n\n\n4\nThe Union and ABX had a number of unresolved grievances regarding the interpretation of the old and new CBAs. ", "In particular, they disagreed on how to interpret the new three-days-off rule, a provision requiring a minimum of three days off for crew members with any scheduled time-off. ", "Both parties agreed to submit this minor dispute for arbitration in October 1997.1\n\n\n5\nIn August 1997, the Union's Executive Board members decided that they would not bid on open-flying time until the Union's disputes and grievances with the company were resolved. ", "The Executive Board announced its decision at a subsequent membership meeting, and a number of attendees stated that they too would not bid for open-flying. ", "Following this, a memorandum from the Executive Board's president and the Union's telephone hotlines focused on the three-days-off rule dispute and the decision by the board and members to not bid on open-flying time until their problems with ABX were resolved. ", "All hotlines urged members to remain 100 percent united. ", "In response to a letter from ABX stating that the Union's concerted refusal to bid on open-flying time was illegal, one hotline stated that \"Your union leadership is not asking you to exercise any illegal job action.\" ", "Another hotline stated that \"Each of us needs to prepare for the long haul should Management continue down the road they have chosen with regard to scheduling.\"", "\n\n\n6\nIn September 1997, no Union member bid on open-flying time, and of the 617 open lines available in October, only 13 bids were submitted. ", "Some of those who bid on October flights stated they were harassed by other Union members. ", "ABX claims the Union's self-help action cost it more than $200,000 for the additional junior-manning required. ", "Though it had won prior bids for Christmas season charter contracts, ABX did not compete for a $3 million contract in 1997 based on staffing concerns raised by the open-flying ban.", "\n\n\n7\nABX filed a complaint alleging that the Union and its members boycotted open-flying bidding and that this concerted action constituted an illegal strike in aid of a minor dispute in violation of 45 U.S.C. § 184 (1999). ", "It also asserted that this concerted action violated the Union's mandatory duty under 45 U.S.C. § 152, First (1999) to exert every reasonable effort to resolve its dispute with ABX over the proper interpretation of the three-days-offrule. ", "ABX requested injunctive, declaratory, and monetary remedies.", "\n\n\n8\nThe district court rejected ABX's initial request for a preliminary injunction, holding that ABX had not shown that the concerted ban on open-flying had caused an interruption in its operations. ", "In considering Article 13 of the CBA, it stated \"by declining to bid for overtime but accepting it when assigned, Defendant's members may exert influence without interrupting Plaintiff's operations and, thus, without engaging in a strike.\" ", "Therefore, without an interruption in operations, the court ruled that the Union members' action was not a strike, and it had no jurisdiction to issue an injunction. ", "Upon an interlocutory appeal, this court ruled that the injunction request was moot because the bidding ban had ceased, but remanded the case for further consideration of the declaratory and monetary relief issues. ", "See ABX Air, Inc. v. Airline Prof'ls Ass'n of the Int'l Bhd. ", "of Teamsters, Local 1224, No. ", "97-4124, 1998 WL 165146 (6th Cir. ", "Apr. 3, 1998).", "\n\n\n9\nAt the subsequent trial, the court considered the question of whether the actions of the Union and its members constituted an \"interruption of operations\" at ABX and thus an illegal strike. ", "In its findings of fact, the court found that the Union conceived of and promoted the ban on open-flying, and that its members' concerted action was in aid of the minor dispute over the three-days-off rule, which was subject to arbitration. ", "In defining \"strike,\" the court relied on 29 U.S.C. § 142(2) of the National Labor Relations Act (\"NLRA\"), which states that the term \"strike\" includes a \"concerted interruption of operations by employees.\" ", "As a question of first impression and in the absence of authority to the contrary, the court concluded that the definition of \"strike\" encompasses \"concerted activity by employees, promoted and directed by their union, pending resolution of a minor dispute, that disrupts the employer's operations and causes a loss of business or profit with the intention of exerting pressure upon the employer to change its interpretation of the existing collective bargaining agreement.\" ", "On this basis, the court held that the Union's activities violated 45 U.S.C. § 184 and § 152, First (1999), and thus it had jurisdiction to enjoin the Union from threatened future action. ", "In addition, the court denied ABX's prayer for money damages based on CSX Transp., ", "Inc. v. Marquar, 980 F.2d 359, 382 (6th Cir. ", "1992).", "\n\n\n10\nThe Union appeals the district court's ruling on declaratory and injunctive relief, and ABX cross-appeals its denial of monetary damages.2\n\nII. ", "STANDARD OF REVIEW\n\n11\nThe district court's \"factual findings must be upheld unless they are clearly erroneous.\" ", "Taylor and Gaskin v. Chris-Craft Indus., ", "732 F.2d 1273, 1277 (1984) (citing Fed. ", "R. Civ. ", "P. 52(a)). ", "As a matter of law, this court reviews de novo the district court's statutory construction of the Railway Labor Act (\"RLA\") regarding the scope of its subject matter jurisdiction. ", "See United States v. Brown, 915 F.2d 219, 223 (6th Cir. ", "1990).", "\n\nIII. ", "DISCUSSION\n\n12\nUnder 45 U.S.C. § 181 (1999), all RLA provisions under 45 U.S.C. § 151 et seq. ", "apply to air carriers engaged in interstate and foreign commerce and their employees, except § 153 which is replaced by § 184. ", "Section 152, First sets forth twocore duties applicable in all disputes between carriers and their employees. ", "See Consolidated Rail Corp. v. Railway Labor Executives' Ass'n, 491 U.S. 299, 310-11 (1989) (hereinafter Conrail); Marquar, 980 F.2d at 368 (citing Chicago & N.W. Ry. ", "v. United Transp. ", "Union, 402 U.S. 570, 574 (1971)). ", "First, both parties shall \"'exert every reasonable effort to make and maintain agreements concerning rates of pay, rules, and working conditions.'\" ", " Marquar, 980 F.2d at 368 (citation omitted). ", "Second, both parties shall \"'settle all disputes, whether arising out of the application of ... agreements or otherwise, in order to avoid any interruption to commerce or to the operation of any carrier growing out of any dispute.", "\"Brotherhood of R.R. Trainmen v. Chicago River & Ind. R.R. Co., 353 U.S. 30, 36 (1957) (hereinafter Chicago River) (citation omitted).", "\n\n\n13\nBecause there is no equivalent of the National Railroad Adjustment Board for the airline industry, 45 U.S.C. § 184 requires every carrier and its employees to establish an adjustment board by agreement. ", "See Conrail, 491 U.S. at 304 n.4. ", "If the parties fail to settle disputes \"growing out of grievances, or out of the interpretation or application of agreements concerning rates of pay, rules, or working conditions\" through negotiation, one or both of the parties may petition the adjustment board to resolve it. ", "45 U.S.C. §184; see also Conrail, 491 U.S. at 304 n.4.", "\n\n\n14\nUnder the RLA, the Supreme Court distinguishes between major and minor disputes between carriers and employees regarding their CBAs. ", "See Conrail, 491 U.S. at 302 (acknowledging the first recognition of this distinction under Elgin, Joliet & E. Ry. ", "v. Burley, 325 U.S. 711, 723 (1945)). ", "Major disputes involve disagreements over the creation of contractual rights during bargaining for a CBA or to change the terms of an existing agreement. ", "See id.; Marquar, 980 F.2d at 361 n.2. ", "Under 45 U.S.C. § 152, Seventh and § 156, the parties must exhaust a lengthy bargaining and mediation process. ", "See id.", "Both are obligated to maintain the status quo during the required process, and the courts can enjoin any status quo violation.", "See Conrail, 491 U.S. at 302-03. ", "If no agreement is reached, the parties may resort to economic force, including strikes. ", "See id.; Marquar, 980 F.2d at 361 n.2.", "\n\n\n15\nMinor disputes include controversies over the meaning or application of an existing CBA provision regarding pay, rules, or working conditions to a specific situation or omitted case. ", "See Conrail, 491 U.S. at 303; Marquar, 980 F.2d at 361 n.2. ", "If discussions fail to yield a solution, both parties are subject to compulsory and binding arbitration before an adjustment board under 45 U.S.C. § 152, Sixth and § 184. ", "See id. While the courts have no jurisdiction to resolve the substance of minor disputes, they can enjoin strikes over minor disputes in order to enforce compliance with the RLA's dispute resolution provisions. ", "See Conrail, 491 U.S. at 304; Chicago River, 353 U.S. at 41-42; Marquar, 980 F.2d at 369.", "\n\n\n16\nA. Factual Issue - Minor Dispute over Open-Flying or Three-Day Rule\n\n\n17\nThe Union argues that the record does not support the district court's factual findings that this case involves a minor dispute over the CBA's three-days-off rule and that the Union promoted and directed the open-flying ban in aid of this minor dispute. ", "Rather it argues that this casesimply involves a minor dispute over Article 13's open-flying provisions, separate and apart from the three-days-off rule. ", "Based on the Union's interpretation, Article 13 provides crew members with an implicit right to not volunteer for open-flying time, separately or in concert. ", "The Union contends that the district court \"ignored the uncontested evidence\" that its members voluntarily chose not to bid for open-flying time, without direction from Union officials, based on their dissatisfaction with ABX's slow response to their grievances on several issues. ", "Thus, the Union contests the factual finding that it \"conceived of and promoted\" a ban on open-flying time bids in aid of its dispute over the three-days-off rule.", "\n\n\n18\nOverall, the Union reiterates its characterization of the evidence presented at trial, which was contested by ABX, and fails to demonstrate clear error by the district court. ", "Giving due regard to the court's credibility judgments at trial, we affirm the district court's factual findings and hold that it had subject matter jurisdiction to determine whether the concerted actions of the Union and its members under Article 13 constituted an illegal strike. ", "See Fed. ", "R. Civ. ", "P. 52(a).", "\n\nB. Strike or Minor Dispute\n\n19\nThe key question is whether the Union's promotion of a concerted action under the CBA's voluntary open-flying bidding provision constitutes an illegal strike arising from another minor dispute. ", "If there is no strike, there is no subject matter jurisdiction for the issuance of an injunction. ", "See Conrail, 491 U.S. at 304; Chicago River, 353 U.S. at 41-42; Marquar,980 F.2d at 369.", "\n\n\n20\nAs the RLA does not define the term \"strike,\" the district court properly looked to 29 U.S.C. § 142(2) for assistance in determining whether the Union's conduct qualified as a \"strike\" in this \"carefully drawn analog[y]\" between the NLRA and RLA. ", "Trans World Airlines, Inc. v. Indep. ", "Fed. ", "of Flight Attendents, 489 U.S. 426, 432-33 (1989); see also Brotherhood of R.R. Trainmen v. Jacksonville Terminal Co., 394 U.S. 369 (1969). ", "In applying the NLRA's definition of \"strike,\" the district court held that its provision regarding \"concerted interruptions of operations by employees\"3 includes this case's factual circumstances: \"a concerted activity by employees that disrupts the employer's operations and causes a loss of business or profit, promoted and directed by their union, pending resolution of a minor dispute, with the intention of exerting pressure upon the employer to change its interpretation of the existing collective bargaining agreement.\" ", "While the district court noted cases stating that a concerted refusal to work overtime may constitute a strike, this circuit has not ruled that a concerted refusal to volunteer for overtime, when the work is assigned and willingly performed by others according to the CBA, is a strike.", "\n\n\n21\nWhile the parties' duty to negotiate yields to the adjustment board's authority to resolve minor disputes once they are submitted and no status quo requirement applies to minor disputes, the RLA does not sanction strike actions camouflaged as minor disputes, which threaten to undermine its grievance resolution provisions. ", "See, e.g., Conrail, 491 U.S. at 310 (stating that if the employer asserts that the agreement permits it to make a change in working conditions withoutprior negotiations and the claim is arguably justified by the agreement and not made in bad faith, the employer can make the change); Marquar, 980 F.2d at 361 n.2 (stating that an adjustment board has exclusive jurisdiction to resolve minor disputes that the parties cannot resolve). ", "In determining whether the district court properly held that the concerted action of the crew members and Union qualified as a \"concerted interruption of operations,\" three cases provide guidance.", "\n\n\n22\nAir Lines Pilots Ass'n v. United Air Lines, Inc., 802 F.2d 886, 905-07 (7th Cir. ", "1986), and Texas Int'l Airlines, Inc. v. Air Line Pilots Ass'n, 518 F. Supp. ", "203, 208 (S.D. Tex. ", "1981), dealt with concerted actions taken during CBA negotiations. ", "While the Seventh Circuit in United Air Lines stated that the consequences of union conduct short of an outright strike could qualify as a strike, it did not find that the pilots' concerted abuse of sick leave, which arguably increased operational costs, and efforts to discourage business resulted in economic harm sufficient to qualify as a strike. ", "See id. at 906-07. ", "Rather, in the absence of any work stoppages, mass demonstrations, or economic harm, the court ruled that the union's actions did not constitute an unlawful strike. ", "See id. at 907.", "\n\n\n23\nIn Texas Int'l Airlines, the union directed its pilots to exercise their contractual right to sick leave and the pilots engaged in other concerted actions that resulted in a work slowdown and increased the carrier's operating costs. ", "See 518 F. Supp. ", "at 212-14. ", "In issuing an injunction, the district court found that these actions interrupted the carrier's operations and were intended to pressure the airline to concede to the union's bargaining demands. ", "See id. at 212-14, 217.", "\n\n\n24\nFinally, the Eleventh Circuit recently ruled in a case where pilots engaged in a concerted refusal to fly overtime during contract negotiations in Delta Air Lines v. Air Line Pilots Ass'n, 238 F.3d 1300, 1309 (11th Cir. ", "2001). ", "The court rejected the union's contention that this was a minor dispute because the CBA \"arguably\" permitted all pilots to refuse to work overtime. ", "See id. at 1307. ", "It stated that such an interpretation defied industry practice to structure flight schedules using open-flying time as part of normal operations. ", "See id. at 1307, 1309. ", "The court then found that the pilots' concerted action violated the union's statutory obligation to \"exert every reasonable effort to make and maintain agreements\" under §152, First. ", "See id. at 1307-09. ", "As a result, the court enjoined the union to take specific steps to stop the no-overtime campaign.", "\n\n\n25\nAs a threshold matter, a fundamental distinction exists between the above three cases and the case before us now. ", "Each of those cases involved a major dispute, during which a union is required to maintain the status quo. ", "In contrast, the dispute between ABX and the Union is a minor one, during which there is no requirement to maintain the status quo, thus making certain types of concerted action available that would not be during a major dispute. ", "Indeed, we cannot find any case in which a union was held to have violated the RLA during a minor dispute by encouraging its members to refrain from engaging in conduct that is voluntary under a CBA.", "\n\n\n26\nFurthermore, the cases relied on by ABX show that a \"concerted interruption of operations\" requires more than higher operational costs incurred by the necessary exercise of contract provisions and alleged losses from foregone contract opportunities. ", "In contrast to Texas Int'l Airlines, the Union members' open-flying ban did not cause a work slowdown. ", "Unlike Delta Air Lines where the union argued that the CBA allowed all pilots torefuse to work overtime, here the Union's interpretation of the open-flying provision did not impair ABX's ability to use junior-manning to assign flights.", "\n\n\n27\nRather, this case more closely resembles the facts in United Air Lines. ", "While the Union's interpretation of Article 13 denotes an intent to pressure ABX in resolving the three-days-off rule dispute, the resulting concerted conduct is allowed under the CBA. ", "Though higher costs and lost business opportunities can serve as evidence of an interruption of operations, ABX did not suffer sufficient economic harm in this case to show an \"interruption of operations.\" ", "Under the CBA, junior- manning is not the optimal means of assigning flight staff and its use certainly increases costs. ", "However, ABX agreed to this contract provision, utilized it to legally assign crew members to open flights, and did not suffer staffing or flight interruptions. ", "While ABX decided not to compete for certain seasonal contracts in light of the open-flying ban, its regular business base was not impaired. ", "Though the Union's Article 13 interpretation effectively exercises strategic leverage in a minor dispute, ABX's economic injuries do not qualify the crew members' concerted ban on open-flying bidding as a \"strike.\" ", "Therefore, we hold that the district court erred in determining that this open-flying ban qualified as a \"concerted interruption of operations\" under the NLRA's definition of \"strike.\"", "\n\nC. Monetary Damages under Marquar\n\n28\nIn its cross-appeal, ABX urges this court to overrule Marquar, 980 F.2d at 379-82, which prohibits money damages to carriers that suffer economic harm from a union's unlawful strike. ", "It is unnecessary to decide the cross appeal, as we are ruling in favor of the Union. ", "In addition, this panel cannot overrule controlling authority set forth by another panel. ", "See Salmi v. Sec'y of Health and Human Servs., ", "774 F.2d 685, 689 (6th Cir. ", "1985).", "\n\n\n29\nWe AFFIRM the district court's factual findings, REVERSE its decision that there is a \"strike\" in this case, and VACATE its order for injunctive relief on behalf of ABX.", "\n\n\n\nNotes:\n\n\n*\n The Honorable Patrick J. Duggan, United States District Judge for the Eastern District of Michigan, sitting by designation.", "\n\n\n1\n The parties did not include the arbitrator's decision in the record or their briefs.", "\n\n\n2\n The Union asserts that ABX's notice of cross-appeal failed to properly designate the decision appealed from. ", "Based on Fed. ", "R. App. ", "P. 3, ABX's cross-appeal is valid.", "\n\n\n3\n The statute's construction treats concerted interruptions of operations as a different form of concerted action from a work stoppage, slowdown, or strike. ", "See 29 U.S.C. § 142(2).", "\n\n\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "FreeLaw" }

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[ "Antioxidants suppress lymphoma and increase longevity in Atm-deficient mice.", "\nAtaxia telangiectasia (AT), a human hereditary disorder resulting from mutations in the ATM gene, is characterized by a high incidence of lymphoid malignancies, neurodegeneration, immunodeficiency, premature aging, elevated radiosensitivity, and genomic instability. ", "Evidence has been accumulating that ATM-deficient cells are in a continuous state of oxidative stress. ", "A variety of markers of oxidative stress were detected in AT patients as well as Atm-deficient mice, used as an animal model of AT. ", "Since then, it has been proposed that oxidative stress contributes to the clinical phenotype of AT, especially carcinogenesis and neurodegeneration, and several animal studies were conducted to determine whether exogenous antioxidants mitigate the symptoms of AT. ", "Tempol, EUK-189, and N-acetyl cysteine have been tested as chemopreventive antioxidants in Atm-deficient mice. ", "We review these findings, mainly focusing on the effect of N-acetyl cysteine, which is known as a safe and efficient drug and nutritional supplement." ]

{ "pile_set_name": "PubMed Abstracts" }

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[ "\n2008 Color Trends - pius\nhttp://www.colourlovers.com/blog/2008/01/09/happy-blue-year-2008-color-trends/\n======\ned\nPicking a favorite single color seems about as pointless as picking a favorite\nkey on a piano. ", "It's not the color that matters, but how the color interacts\nwith those around it.", "\n\n~~~\neru\nI like the fifth black key from the left.", "\n\n------\ntptacek\nI can't do anything with this \"information\". ", "It seems utterly arbitrary.", "\n\n------\nedw519\nI hope the code I'm writing today will be bringing someone value 20 years from\nnow.", "\n\n(5 years ago, while working on a local company's packaged software, I came\nacross a program that I had written for the software vendor 10 years earlier.", "\nWeird.)", "\n\nSomehow, \"2008 Color Trends\" seems pretty unimportant in the grand scheme of\nthings.", "\n\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "HackerNews" }

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[ " \nThe \nNinth Hour\nFor Sister Mary Rose, C.I.J.\nAlso by Alice McDermott\n\nSomeone\n\nAfter This\n\nChild of My Heart\n\nCharming Billy\n\nAt Weddings and Wakes\n\nThat Night\n\nA Bigamist's Daughter\n\nContents\n\n 1. ", "Cover\n 2. ", "Half-title Page\n 3. ", "Dedication\n 4. ", "Also by Alice McDermott\n 5. ", "Title Page\n 6. ", "Contents\n 7. ", "These Short Dark Days\n 8. ", "And Then\n 9. ", "The Ninth Hour\n 10. ", "Alone\n 11. ", "Rose\n 12. ", "The Convent Child\n 13. ", "Orders\n 14. ", "Sister Lucy\n 15. ", "Reparation\n 16. ", "Overnight\n 17. ", "Stabat Mater\n 18. ", "The Substitute\n 19. ", "True\n 20. ", "A Tonic\n 21. ", "Mercy\n 22. ", "Holy\n 23. ", "Still\n 24. ", "Grace\n 25. ", "Endless Length of Days\n 26. ", "Also available by Alice McDermott\n 1. ", "Someone\n 2. ", "Charming Billy\n 3. ", "At Weddings and Wakes\n 4. ", "After This\n 5. ", "A Bigamist's Daughter\n 6. ", "That Night\n 7. ", "Child of My Heart\n 27. ", "Copyright Page\n\n 1. ", "These Short Dark Days\n 2. ", "And Then\n 3. ", "The Ninth Hour\n 4. ", "Alone\n 5. ", "Rose\n 6. ", "The Convent Child\n 7. ", "Orders\n 8. ", "Sister Lucy\n 9. ", "Reparation\n 10. ", "Overnight\n 11. ", "Stabat Mater\n 12. ", "The Substitute\n 13. ", "True\n 14. ", "A Tonic\n 15. ", "Mercy\n 16. ", "Holy\n 17. ", "Still\n 18. ", "Grace\n 19. ", "Endless Length of Days\n 20. _", "Also available by Alice McDermott_\n\n 1. ", "i\n 2. ", "ii\n 3. ", "iii\n 4. ", "iv\n 5. ", "v\n 6. ", "\n 7. ", "\n 8. ", "\n 9. ", "\n 10. ", "\n 11. ", "\n 12. ", "\n 13. ", "\n 14. ", "\n 15. ", "\n 16. ", "\n 17. ", "\n 18. ", "\n 19. ", "\n 20. ", "\n 21. ", "\n 22. ", "\n 23. ", "\n 24. ", "\n 25. ", "\n 26. ", "\n 27. ", "\n 28. ", "\n 29. ", "\n 30. ", "\n 31. ", "\n 32. ", "\n 33. ", "\n 34. ", "\n 35. ", "\n 36. ", "\n 37. ", "\n 38. ", "\n 39. ", "\n 40. ", "\n 41. ", "\n 42. ", "\n 43. ", "\n 44. ", "\n 45. ", "\n 46. ", "\n 47. ", "\n 48. ", "\n 49. ", "\n 50. ", "\n 51. ", "\n 52. ", "\n 53. ", "\n 54. ", "\n 55. ", "\n 56. ", "\n 57. ", "\n 58. ", "\n 59. ", "\n 60. ", "\n 61. ", "\n 62. ", "\n 63. ", "\n 64. ", "\n 65. ", "\n 66. ", "\n 67. ", "\n 68. ", "\n 69. ", "\n 70. ", "\n 71. ", "\n 72. ", "\n 73. ", "\n 74. ", "\n 75. ", "\n 76. ", "\n 77. ", "\n 78. ", "\n 79. ", "\n 80. ", "\n 81. ", "\n 82. ", "\n 83. ", "\n 84. ", "\n 85. ", "\n 86. ", "\n 87. ", "\n 88. ", "\n 89. ", "\n 90. ", "\n 91. ", "\n 92. ", "\n 93. ", "\n 94. ", "\n 95. ", "\n 96. ", "\n 97. ", "\n 98. ", "\n 99. ", "\n 100. ", "\n 101. ", "\n 102. ", "\n 103. ", "\n 104. ", "\n 105. ", "\n 106. ", "\n 107. ", "\n 108. ", "\n 109. ", "\n 110. ", "\n 111. ", "\n 112. ", "\n 113. ", "\n 114. ", "\n 115. ", "\n 116. ", "\n 117. ", "\n 118. ", "\n 119. ", "\n 120. ", "\n 121. ", "\n 122. ", "\n 123. ", "\n 124. ", "\n 125. ", "\n 126. ", "\n 127. ", "\n 128. ", "\n 129. ", "\n 130. ", "\n 131. ", "\n 132. ", "\n 133. ", "\n 134. ", "\n 135. ", "\n 136. ", "\n 137. ", "\n 138. ", "\n 139. ", "\n 140. ", "\n 141. ", "\n 142. ", "\n 143. ", "\n 144. ", "\n 145. ", "\n 146. ", "\n 147. ", "\n 148. ", "\n 149. ", "\n 150. ", "\n 151. ", "\n 152. ", "\n 153. ", "\n 154. ", "\n 155. ", "\n 156. ", "\n 157. ", "\n 158. ", "\n 159. ", "\n 160. ", "\n 161. ", "\n 162. ", "\n 163. ", "\n 164. ", "\n 165. ", "\n 166. ", "\n 167. ", "\n 168. ", "\n 169. ", "\n 170. ", "\n 171. ", "\n 172. ", "\n 173. ", "\n 174. ", "\n 175. ", "\n 176. ", "\n 177. ", "\n 178. ", "\n 179. ", "\n 180. ", "\n 181. ", "\n 182. ", "\n 183. ", "\n 184. ", "\n 185. ", "\n 186. ", "\n 187. ", "\n 188. ", "\n 189. ", "\n 190. ", "\n 191. ", "\n 192. ", "\n 193. ", "\n 194. ", "\n 195. ", "\n 196. ", "\n 197. ", "\n 198. ", "\n 199. ", "\n 200. ", "\n 201. ", "\n 202. ", "\n 203. ", "\n 204. ", "\n 205. ", "\n 206. ", "\n 207. ", "\n 208. ", "\n 209. ", "\n 210. ", "\n 211. ", "\n 212. ", "\n 213. ", "\n 214. ", "\n 215. ", "\n 216. ", "\n 217. ", "\n 218. ", "\n 219. ", "\n 220. ", "\n 221. ", "\n 222. ", "\n 223. ", "\n 224. ", "\n 225. ", "\n 226. ", "\n 227. ", "\n 228. ", "\n 229. ", "\n 230. ", "\n 231. ", "\n 232. ", "\n 233. ", "\n 234. ", "\n 235. ", "\n 236. ", "\n 237. ", "\n 238. ", "\n 239. ", "\n 240. ", "\n 241. ", "\n 242. ", "\n 243. ", "\n 244. ", "\n 245. ", "\n 246. ", "\n 247. ", "\n 248. ", "\n 249. ", "\n 250. ", "\n 251. ", "\n 252. ", "\n 253. ", "\n 254. ", "\n 255. ", "\n 256. ", "\n 257. ", "\n 258.", "\n\n 1. ", "Cover\n 2. ", "Title Page\n 3. ", "These Short Dark Days\n\nThese Short Dark Days\n\nFebruary 3 was a dark and dank day altogether: cold spitting rain in the morning and a low, steel-gray sky the rest of the afternoon.", "\n\nAt four, Jim convinced his wife to go out to do her shopping before full darkness fell. ", "He closed the door on her with a gentle wave. ", "His hair was thinning and he was missing a canine on the right side, but he was nevertheless a handsome man who, at thirty-two, might still have passed for twenty. ", "Heavy brows and deep-set, dark-lashed eyes that had been making women catch their breath since he was sixteen. ", "Even if he had grown bald and toothless, as he seemed fated to do, the eyes would have served him long into old age.", "\n\nHis overcoat was on the hall tree beside the door. ", "He lifted it and rolled it lengthwise against his thighs. ", "Then he fitted it over the threshold, tucking the cloth of the sleeves and the hem as well as he could into the space beneath the door. ", "Theirs was a railroad flat: kitchen in the back, dining room, living room, bedroom in the front. ", "He needed only to push the heavy couch a few feet farther along the wall to block his wife's return. ", "He stood on the seat to check that the glass transom above the door was tightly closed. ", "Then he stepped down. ", "He straightened the lace on the back of the couch and brushed away the shallow impression his foot had made on the horsehair cushion.", "\n\nIn the kitchen, he pressed his cheek to the cold enamel of the stove and slid his hand into the tight space between it and the yellow wall. ", "He groped a bit. ", "They kept a baited mousetrap back there, or had in the past, and it made him careful. ", "He found the rubber hose that connected the oven to the gas tap and pulled at it as vigorously as he could, given the confined space. ", "There was a satisfying pop, and a hiss that quickly faded. ", "He straightened up with the hose in his hand. ", "The kitchen window looked into the gray courtyard where, on better days, there would be lines of clothes baking in the sun, although the floor of the deep courtyard, even in the prettiest weather, was a junkyard and a jungle. ", "There were rats and bedsprings and broken crates. ", "A tangle of city-bred vegetation: a sickly tree, black vines, a long-abandoned attempt at a garden. ", "From rag-and-bone man to wayward drunk, any voice that ever rose out of its depths was the voice of someone up to no good. ", "Once, Annie, sitting on the windowsill with a clothespin in her mouth and a basket of wet linen at her feet, saw a man drag a small child through the muck and tie him to the rough pole that held the line. ", "She watched the man take off his belt, and, with the first crack of it against the child's bare calves, she began to yell. ", "She threw the clothespins at him, a potted ivy plant, and then the metal washbasin still filled with soapy water. ", "Leaning halfway out the window herself, she threatened to call the police, the fire department, the Gerrity Society. ", "The man, as if pursued only by a change in the weather, a sudden rain, glanced up briefly, shrugged, and then untied the sobbing child and dragged him away. \"", "I know who you are,\" Annie cried. ", "Although she didn't. ", "She was an easy liar. ", "She paced the street for an hour that afternoon, waiting for the man and the boy to reappear.", "\n\nWhen Jim ran into the kitchen at the sound of her shouting, she was from head to waist out the window, with only one toe on the kitchen floor. ", "He'd had to put his hands on her hips to ease her out of danger. ", "Just one more of what had turned out to be too many days he hadn't gone in to work or had arrived too late for his shift.", "\n\nHis trouble was with time. ", "Bad luck for a trainman, even on the BRT. ", "His trouble was, he liked to refuse time. ", "He delighted in refusing it. ", "He would come to the end of a long night, to the inevitability of 5 a.m.—that boundary, that abrupt wall toward which all the night's pleasures ran (drink, talk, sleep, or Annie's warm flesh)—and while other men, poor sheep, gave in every morning, turned like lambs in the chute from the pleasures of sleep or drink or talk or love to the duties of the day, he had been aware since his childhood that with the easiest refusal, eyes shut, he could continue as he willed. ", "I'm not going, he'd only have to murmur. ", "I won't be constrained. ", "Of course, it didn't always require refusing the whole day. ", "Sometimes just the pleasure of being an hour or two late was enough to remind him that he, at least, was his own man, that the hours of his life—and what more precious commodity did he own?—belonged to himself alone.", "\n\nTwo weeks ago they had discharged him for unreliability and insubordination. ", "Inside the shell of his flesh, the man he was—not the blushing, humiliated boy who stood ham-handed before them—simply shook off the blow and turned away, indifferent, free. ", "But Annie wept when he told her, and then said angrily, through her tears, that there was a baby coming, knowing even as she said it that to break the news to him in this way was to condemn the child to a life of trouble.", "\n\nHe took the tea towels she had left to dry on the sink, wound them into ropes, and placed them along the sill of the kitchen window.", "\n\nHe carried the length of rubber tubing through the living room and into the bedroom. ", "He slipped off his shoes, put the tube to his mouth, as if to pull smoke. ", "He had seen this in a picture book back home: a fat sultan on a red pillow doing much the same. ", "He sat on the edge of the bed. ", "He bowed his head and prayed: _Now and at the hour of our death._ ", "He lay back on the bed. ", "The room had gotten dimmer still. _", "Hour of our. ", "Our hour._ ", "At home, his mother, the picture book spread out on her wide lap, would reach behind him to turn the clock face to the wall.", "\n\nWithin this very hour he would put his head on her shoulder once again. ", "Or would he? ", "There were moments when his faith fell out from under him like a trapdoor. ", "He stood up. ", "Found his nightshirt underneath his pillow and twisted it, too. ", "Then placed it along the edge of the one window, again pushing the material into the narrow crevice where the frame met the sill, knowing all the while that the gesture was both ineffectual and unnecessary.", "\n\nDown in the street, there was a good deal of movement—women mostly, because the shops were open late and the office workers had not yet begun to file home. ", "Dark coats and hats. ", "A baby buggy or two, the wheels turning up a pale spray. ", "He watched two nuns in black cloaks and white wimples, their heads bent together, skim over the gray sidewalk. ", "He watched until they were gone, his cheek now pressed to the cool window glass. ", "When he turned back into the room, the light had failed in every corner and he had to put out his hand as he walked around the pale bed, back to his own side.", "\n\nHe stretched out once again. ", "Playfully lifted the hose to one eye, as if he would see along its length the black corridor of a subway tunnel, lit gold at the farthest end by the station ahead. ", "Then he placed the hose in his mouth and breathed deeply once more. ", "He felt the nausea, the sudden vertigo, he had been expecting all along but had forgotten he was expecting. ", "He closed his eyes and swallowed. ", "Outside, a mother called to a child. ", "There was the slow clopping of a horse-drawn cart. ", "The feathered sound of wheels turning in street water. ", "Something dropped to the floor in the apartment just above him—a sewing basket, perhaps—there was a thud and then a scratchy chorus of wooden spools spinning. ", "Or maybe it was coins, spilled from a fallen purse.", "\n\nAt six, the streetlamps against the wet dark gave a polish to the air. ", "There was the polish of lamplight, too, on streetcar tracks and windowpanes and across the gleaming surface of the scattered black puddles in the street. ", "Reflection of lamplight as well on the rump of the remaining fire truck and on the pale faces of the gathered crowd, with an extra gold sparkle and glint on anyone among them who wore glasses. ", "Sister St. Saviour, for instance, a Little Nursing Sister of the Sick Poor, who had spent the afternoon in the vestibule of the Woolworth's at Borough Hall, her alms basket in her lap. ", "She was now on her way back to the convent, her bladder full, her ankles swollen, her round glasses turned toward the lamplight and the terrible scent of doused fire on the winter air.", "\n\nThe pouch with the money she had collected today was tied to her belt; the small basket she used was tucked under her cloak and under her arm. ", "The house where the fire had been looked startled: the windows of all four floors were wide open, shade cords and thin curtains flailing in the cold air. ", "Although the rest of the building was dark, the vestibule at the top of the stone stoop was weirdly lit, crowded with policemen and firemen carrying lamps. ", "The front door was open, as, it appeared, was the door to the apartment on the parlor floor. ", "Sister St. Saviour wanted only to walk on, to get to her own convent, her own room, her own toilet—her fingers were cold and her ankles swollen and her thin basket was crushed awkwardly under her arm—but still she brushed through the crowd and climbed the steps. ", "There was a limp fire hose running along the shadowy base of the stone banister. ", "Two of the officers in the hallway, turning to see her, tipped their hats and then put out their hands as if she had been summoned. \"", "Sister,\" one of them said. ", "He was flushed and perspiring, and even in the dull light, she could see that the cuffs of his jacket were singed. \"", "Right in here.\"", "\n\nThe apartment was crowded with people, perhaps every tenant in the place. ", "The smell of smoke and wet ash, burned wool, burned hair, was part and parcel of the thick pools of candlelight in the room, and of the heavy drone of whispered conversation. ", "There were two groups: one was gathered around a middle-aged man in shirtsleeves and carpet slippers who was sitting in a chair by the window, his face in his hands. ", "The other, across the room, hovered beside a woman stretched out on a dark couch, under a fringed lamp that was not lit. ", "She had a cloth applied to her head, but she seemed to be speaking sensibly to the thin young man who leaned over her. ", "When she saw the nun, the woman raised a limp hand and said, \"She's in the bedroom, Sister.\" ", "Her arm from wrist to elbow was glistening with a shiny salve—butter, perhaps.", "\n\n\"You might leave off with that grease,\" Sister said. \"", "Unless you're determined to be basted.\" ", "The young man turned at this, laughing. ", "He wore a gray fedora and had a milk tooth in his grin. \"", "Have the courtesy to doff your hat,\" she told him.", "\n\nIt was Sister St. Saviour's vocation to enter the homes of strangers, mostly the sick and the elderly, to breeze into their apartments and to sail comfortably through their rooms, to open their linen closets or china cabinets or bureau drawers—to peer into their toilets or the soiled handkerchiefs clutched in their hands—but the frequency with which she inserted herself into the homes of strangers had not diminished over the years, her initial impulse to stand back, to shade her eyes. ", "She dipped her head as she passed through the parlor, into a narrow corridor, but she saw enough to conclude that a Jewish woman lived here—the woman on the couch, she was certain, a Jewish woman, she only guessed, because of the fringed lampshade, the upright piano against the far wall, the dark oil paintings in the narrow hallway that seemed to depict two ordinary peasants, not saints. ", "A place unprepared for visitors, arrested, as things so often were by crisis and tragedy, in the midst of what should have been a private hour. ", "She saw as she passed by that there was a plate on the small table in the tiny kitchen, that it contained a half piece of bread, well bitten and stained with a dark gravy. ", "A glass of tea on the edge of a folded newspaper.", "\n\nIn the candlelit bedroom, where two more policemen were conferring in the far corner, there were black stockings hung over the back of a chair, a mess of hairbrushes and handkerchiefs on the low dresser, a gray corset on the threadbare carpet at the foot of the bed. ", "There was a girl on the bed, sideways, her dark skirt spread around her, as if she had fallen there from some height. ", "Her back was to the room and her face to the wall. ", "Another woman leaned over her, a hand on the girl's shoulder.", "\n\nThe policemen nodded to see the nun, and the shorter one took off his cap as he moved toward her. ", "He, too, was singed about the cuffs. ", "He had a heavy face, stale breath, and bad dentures, but there was compassion in the way he gestured with his short arms toward the girl on the bed, toward the ceiling and the upstairs apartment where the fire had been, a compassion that seemed to weigh down his limbs. ", "Softhearted, Sister thought, one of us. ", "The girl, he said, had come in from her shopping and found the door to her place blocked from the inside. ", "She went to her neighbors, the man next door and the woman who lived here. ", "They helped her push the door open, and then the man lit a match to hold against the darkness. ", "There was an explosion. ", "Luckily, the policeman said, he himself was just at the corner and was able to put the fire out while neighbors carried the three of them down here. ", "Inside, in the bedroom, he found a young man on the bed. ", "Asphyxiated. ", "The girl's husband.", "\n\nSister St. Saviour drew in her breath, blessed herself. \"", "He fell asleep, poor man,\" she said softly. \"", "The pilot light must have gone out.\"", "\n\nThe officer glanced over his shoulder, toward the bed, and then took the Sister's elbow. ", "He walked her out to the narrow hall. ", "Now they stood in the kitchen doorway; the arrested tableau: the bitten bread, the dark gravy, the glass of reddish tea on a small wooden table, the chair pushed back (there had been an urgent knock on the door), the newspaper with its crooked lines of black ink.", "\n\n\"He killed himself,\" the officer whispered, his breath sour, as if in reaction to the situation he was obliged to report. \"", "Turned on the gas. ", "Lucky he didn't take everyone else with him.\"", "\n\nAccustomed as she was to breezing into the lives of strangers, Sister accepted the information with only a discreet nod, but in the space of it, in the time it took her merely to turn her cheek and bow her head, her eyes disappeared behind the stiff edge of her bonnet. ", "When she looked up again—her eyes behind the glasses were small and brown and caught the little bit of light the way only a hard surface could, marble or black tin, nothing watery—the truth of the suicide was both acknowledged and put away. ", "She had pried handkerchiefs from the tight fists of young women, opened them to see the blood mixed with phlegm, and then balled them up again, nodding in just such a way. ", "She had breezed into the homes of strangers and seen the bottles in the bin, the poor contents of a cupboard, the bruise in a hidden place, seen as well, once, a pale, thumb-sized infant in a basin filled with blood and, saying nothing at all, had bowed her head and nodded in just such a way.", "\n\n\"What's the girl's name?\" ", "she asked.", "\n\nThe officer frowned. \"", "Mc-something. ", "Annie, they called her. ", "Irish extraction,\" he added. \"", "That's why I thought to call for you.\"", "\n\nSister smiled. ", "Those button eyes had dark depths. \"", "Is that so?\" ", "she said. ", "They both knew no one had called for her. ", "She had been on her way home, merely passing by. ", "She dipped her head again, forgiving him his vanity—didn't he say, too, that he'd put out the fire himself? \"", "I'll go to her, then,\" she said.", "\n\nAs she stepped away she saw the milk-toothed young man, still in his hat, approach the officer. \"", "Hey, O'Neil,\" the man shouted. ", "No courtesy in him.", "\n\nInside the shadowed bedroom, the neighbor woman who stood at the bedside had her eyes elsewhere, on the gloaming at the far side of the cluttered room. ", "She was a stout woman, about forty. ", "No doubt there were children waiting to be put to bed, a husband to be placated. ", "A woman with a family of her own, with troubles of her own, could not be expected to attend to the sorrows of another indefinitely.", "\n\nThe nun only nodded as the two exchanged places. ", "At the door of the room, the woman looked over her shoulder and whispered, \"Can I do anything for you, Sister?\"", "\n\nSister St. Saviour recalled a joke she had once made, when a young nun asked her the same, in the midst of a busy morning. \"", "Yes. ", "Can you go tinkle for me?\"", "\n\nBut she said, \"We'll be fine.\" ", "It was what she wanted this Annie Mc-something to hear.", "\n\nWhen the woman was gone, Sister reached inside her cloak and took the small basket from under her arm. ", "It was a flimsy thing, woven of unblessed palms, and much worse the wear for being crushed against her body so long. ", "She straightened and reshaped it a bit, catching as she did the green scent that the warmth of her own flesh and the work of her hands could sometimes coax from the dried reeds. ", "She placed the basket on the table beside the bed and untied the money pouch from her belt. ", "It was all coins today, mostly pennies. ", "She placed the pouch in the basket and then sat carefully on the side of the bed, her kidneys aching, her feet throbbing inside her shoes. ", "She looked at the girl's form, the length of her back and the curve of her young hip, her thin legs beneath the wide skirt. ", "Suddenly the girl turned in the bed and threw herself into Sister's lap, weeping.", "\n\nSister St. Saviour put her hand to the girl's dark hair. ", "It was thick, and soft as silk. ", "A thing of luxurious beauty. ", "Sister lifted the heavy knot of it that was coming undone at the nape of her neck and brushed a strand from her cheek.", "\n\nThis much the nun was certain of: the husband had cherished this girl with the beautiful hair. ", "Love was not the trouble. ", "Money, more likely. ", "Alcohol. ", "Madness. ", "The day and time itself: late afternoon in early February, was there a moment of the year better suited for despair? ", "Sister herself had had the very same thought earlier today, during her long hours of begging in the drafty vestibule. ", "We're all feeling it, she'd thought—we being all who passed along the street and in and out of the store, wet-shouldered, stooped, all who saw her and pretended not to, all who scowled and all (though not very many on this dank day) who reached into a pocket or a purse as they approached—we're all feeling it, she'd thought, in this vale of tears: the weight of the low sky and the listless rain and the damp depths of this endless winter, the sour smell of the vestibule, the brimstone breath of the subway, of the copper coins, the cold that slips in behind your spine and hollows you out at the core. ", "Six and a half hours she'd sat begging today, so weighted by the weather and the time of year that she'd been unable to stir herself from her perch to face the daily humiliation of making use of the store's public stalls. ", "And so she had left her chair an hour earlier than usual.", "\n\n\"What we must do,\" she said at last, \"is to put one foot in front of the other.\" ", "It was her regular introductory phrase. \"", "Have you had your dinner?\" ", "she said. ", "The girl shook her head against the nun's thigh. \"", "Are there relations we can call for you?\" ", "Again she shook her head. \"", "No one,\" she whispered. \"", "Just Jim and me.\" ", "Sister had the impulse to lift the girl's shoulder a bit, take the pressure of it off her own aching bladder, but resisted. ", "She could endure it a little longer. \"", "You'll need a place to stay,\" she said. \"", "For tonight, anyway.\"", "\n\nNow the girl pulled away and raised her face to the dim light. ", "She was neither as young nor as pretty as Sister had imagined. ", "It was a plain, round face, swollen with tears, streaked with wet strands of the lovely hair. \"", "Where will I bury him?\" ", "she asked. ", "In her eyes the nun saw the determination—no result of the Sister's admonition, but rather what the woman herself was made of—to put one foot in front of the other. \"", "We've got a plot in Calvary,\" she said. \"", "We got it when we were married. ", "But the Church will never allow it now.\"", "\n\n\"Have you got the deed?\" ", "she asked, and the girl nodded.", "\n\n\"Where?\"", "\n\n\"Upstairs,\" she said. \"", "In the sideboard.\"", "\n\nGently, Sister touched the girl's cheek. ", "Not as young or as pretty as she had first imagined, but already the face was familiar: the arch of the heavy eyebrows, the slight protrusion of the upper lip, the line of beauty marks along the cheek. ", "Despair had weighted the day. ", "God Himself was helpless against it—Sister St. Saviour believed this. ", "She believed that God held His head in His hands all the while a young man in the apartment above slipped off this gray life—collar and yoke—not for lack of love, but for the utter inability to go on, to climb, once again, out of the depths of a cold February day, a dark and waning afternoon. ", "God wept, she believed this, even as she had gotten off her chair in the lobby of Woolworth's an hour before her usual time, had turned onto the street where there was a fire truck, a dispersing crowd, the lamplight caught in shallow puddles, even as she had climbed the stone steps—footsore and weary and needing a toilet, but going up anyway, although no one had sent for her.", "\n\nThere had been the shadow of the slackened fire hose along the balustrade, like the sloughed skin of a great snake, which should have told her then that the worst was already done.", "\n\nOnce, when she was a younger nun, she'd been sent to a squalid apartment filled with wretched children where a skeletal woman, made old, discolored, barely human, by pain, was in the last throes of her disease. \"", "There's nothing to be done,\" Sister Miriam had advised before they opened the door. ", "And then as they entered—there was the tremendous animal odor of decay, the woman's hoarse moans, the famished children's fraught silence—she added, \"Do what you can.\"", "\n\n\"Your man fell asleep,\" Sister St. Saviour whispered now. \"", "The flame went out. ", "It was a wet and unfortunate day.\" ", "She paused to make sure the girl had heard. \"", "He belongs in Calvary,\" she said. \"", "You paid for the plot, didn't you?\" ", "The girl nodded slowly. \"", "Well, that's where he'll go.\"", "\n\nIn her thirty-seven years of living in this city, Sister had collected any number of acquaintances who could surmount the many rules and regulations—Church rules and city rules and what Sister Miriam called the rules of polite society—that complicated the lives of women: Catholic women in particular and poor women in general. ", "Her own little Tammany, Sister Miriam called it.", "\n\nShe could get this woman's husband buried in Calvary. ", "If it was all done quickly enough, she could manage it.", "\n\n\"How long were you and Jim married?\" ", "the nun asked her. ", "She understood that there was some small resurrection in just speaking the man's name.", "\n\n\"Two years,\" the girl said to the ceiling. ", "And then she brushed her fingertips over her belly. \"", "I've got a baby coming in summer.\"", "\n\nSister nodded. ", "All right. ", "God had His head out of His hands now, at least. ", "He knew the future. \"", "All right,\" she said out loud. ", "There would be a baby to care for in the summer. ", "For once, she would not foist the diapering and the spitting up onto one of the younger nuns. ", "She nearly smiled. ", "Out of the depths—the phrase came to her like a fresh scent on the air—the promise of a baby this summer. ", "A green scent coaxed out of dried reeds.", "\n\nThe girl raised one hand from her stomach and clutched the crown of her hair. \"", "He lost his job,\" she said. \"", "They let him go. ", "The BRT. ", "He was at odd ends.\"", "\n\nGently, Sister moved Annie's hand from out of her hair—it was a mad, dramatic gesture that would lead to mad, dramatic speech—and placed her fingertips once again on her middle, where her thoughts should be. \"", "It might be best,\" Sister said, \"if you don't move tonight. ", "I'll speak to the lady of the house. ", "We'll get something arranged.\"", "\n\nIn the parlor, they all turned to Sister St. Saviour as if she had indeed been summoned to direct the proceedings. ", "It was agreed that the lady of the house, Gertler was her name, would spend the night with her sister-in-law across the street. ", "Since the gas had been turned off and would not be turned on again until tomorrow, most of the building's occupants were clearing out for the evening. ", "In the vestibule, neighbors were coming down the dark staircase with bedding and small satchels in their arms. ", "Sister sent word with one of them to the owner of a boardinghouse nearby: the man in the carpet slippers would go there. ", "The rude young man in the hat had already left, so she asked Officer O'Neil to knock on the door of one Dr. Hannigan. \"", "Mention my name,\" she said. \"", "He'll roll his eyes, but he'll come.\"", "\n\nIt wasn't until they'd all cleared out, and well before Dr. Hannigan arrived, that Sister allowed herself to use the toilet. ", "She was sixty-four that year, but the stiffness in her back and her knees and the arthritis in her hands on these damp days, not to mention the more recent, arbitrary swelling of her ankles and her feet, had begun to limit her usefulness. ", "More and more she was sent out with her basket to beg rather than to nurse. ", "She kept her dissatisfaction with the arrangement to herself, which meant she complained only to God, who knew how she felt. ", "Who had sent her here.", "\n\nShe helped Annie undress and get comfortable in Mrs. Gertler's bed. ", "And held a candle over his shoulder while Dr. Hannigan examined the girl, put a stethoscope to her belly and her rising chest.", "\n\nAs he was leaving, she asked him to go by the convent to tell them where she was—\"So they don't think I've been murdered.\" ", "And to please, as well, go by the morgue to tell them Sheen and Sons Funeral Home would be making the arrangements. ", "She bent her head back to see him better, to make sure her small black eyes were right on his own. ", "There were some details, she added, she'd ask him to keep to himself.", "\n\nLater, two Sisters from the convent arrived with more blankets and two hot water bottles wrapped in rags, and a dinner of biscuits and cheese and hot tea, which Sister St. Saviour ate in the chair she had pulled up to the side of the bed.", "\n\nShe dozed with her rosary in her gloved hands and dreamed, because of the cold, no doubt, and the familiar, icy ache of it in her toes, that she was on her stool in the vestibule of Woolworth's. ", "She startled awake twice, because in her dream the woven basket, full of coins, was sliding off her lap.", "\n\nWhen the darkness had lifted a bit—there was a whiteness to the dawn that made her believe the day would be something more promising than gray—she stood and walked into the parlor. ", "The two Sisters who had brought the supplies, Sister Lucy and a young nun whose name she couldn't recall, were still there, sitting side by side on the couch, asleep, puffed into their black cloaks like gulls on a pier. ", "Slowly, Sister climbed first one flight, then the second, until she found the apartment that had burned. ", "In the growing light it was difficult to say what had been ignited in the blast, although the smell of smoke and burned wool was strong. ", "And then she saw on the floor a man's overcoat and the sodden cushions of a high-backed couch and the black traces of a large burn across the waterlogged rug. ", "In the kitchen, there were the charred remains of a pair of muslin curtains and an arc of soot all along the oven wall. ", "She ran her finger through it, only to confirm that it would be easily removed. ", "What would be difficult to remove, she knew, was this terrible odor, which she was certain the night air had sharpened. ", "It was the smell of wet cinders. ", "The smell of doused peat, of damp stone and swollen wood. ", "Fire, shipwreck, the turned earth of graveyards. ", "She went to the single window in the narrow kitchen. ", "The courtyard below was full of deep shadow and the movements of some small gray birds, but looking down into it disheartened her in a way she had not been prepared for. ", "She sat on the sill, lifted the twisted tea towel that had been left there.", "\n\nOutside, most of the facing windows were still dark, only a small light here and there: an early worker, a mother with an infant, a bedside vigil. ", "Reluctantly, she cast her eyes down into the courtyard again. ", "The sun would have to be well up in the sky to light that dark tangle, but even at this hour there was a variation in the shadows that caught her attention. ", "It was, no doubt, the movement of the birds, or of a stalking cat, or of a patch of puddled rainwater briefly reflecting the coming dawn, but for just a moment she thought it was a man, crawling, _cowering_ was the word, beneath the black tangle of junk and dead leaves, the new, vague light just catching the perspiration on his wide brow, his shining forehead, the gleam of a tooth or an eye.", "\n\nShe shivered, flexed her stiff fingers. ", "She smoothed the towel on her lap and then folded it neatly.", "\n\nShe could tell herself that the illusion was purposeful: God showing her an image of the young man, the suicide, trapped in his bitter purgatory, but she refused the notion. ", "It was superstition. ", "It was without mercy. ", "It was the devil himself who drew her eyes into that tangle, who tempted her toward despair. ", "That was the truth of it.", "\n\nIn the dining room, the sideboard was as big as a boat. ", "She found the lease and the marriage license before she put her hand on the narrow blue folder on which someone had written—it was a man's severe script— _Deed for Calvary_. ", "She slipped it into her pocket.", "\n\nIn the bedroom, the windows were wide open, the shades rolled up, and an ashen cord pull moved slowly in what must have been a dawn breeze. ", "The bed was made, the blankets smoothed, no trace of fire in here, although there was more soot along the far wall. ", "No trace, either, of where the husband might have lain on the bed. ", "She knew immediately—it was the sympathy in his gestures, toward the girl on the bed, toward the apartment above—that it was the short officer who had come back after the body had been removed, to smooth and straighten the counterpane. ", "One of us.", "\n\nSister lifted the two pillows, slipped off their covers, and shook them good—a few white feathers falling through the air—then piled the pillows in the open window. ", "She pulled off the sheets and the blankets, pausing for a moment to remove her glasses and look closely at the bit of mending she felt beneath her hand—small stitches, she saw, neatly made—and said to God, \"As You made us,\" at the familiar sight of the rusty stains here and there on the blue ticking of the mattress. ", "She pushed the sheets into one of the pillowcases and wrapped the blanket around them.", "\n\nAs she stepped away with the linens in her arms, she kicked something with her toe and looked over her shoulder to see what it was. ", "A man's shoe, broad brown leather, well worn. ", "There were two of them at the foot of the bed. ", "Gaping and forlorn, with the black laces wildly trailing. ", "She nudged them with her toe until they were safely out of the way.", "\n\nShe carried the pile of bedding down the narrow stairs. ", "Sister Lucy was still sunk into herself, breathing deeply. ", "Sister St. Saviour dropped the linen on the couch beside her, and when that didn't get her to stir, she touched the Sister's black shoe with her own—and felt the keenness of the repeated motion, the man's empty shoe upstairs and Sister Lucy's here, still filled with its owner's mortal foot. \"", "I'd like you to sit with the lady,\" she said.", "\n\nIn the bedroom, the young nun—Sister Jeanne was her name—had her rosary in her hand and her eyes on the pile of blankets and coats under which the girl slept. ", "Sister St. Saviour signaled to her from the door, and she and Sister Lucy changed places. ", "In the parlor, Sister St. Saviour told Sister Jeanne that she was to bring the bedclothes to the convent for washing and return with a bucket and broom. ", "The two of them were going to scrub the apartment upstairs from head to foot, roll up the wet rug, dry the floors, repair what they could, soften the blow of the woman's return to the place where the accident had occurred, the pilot gone out, because return she would, with nowhere else to go and a baby on the way come summer.", "\n\nSister Jeanne's eyes grew teary at this news. ", "The tears suited her face, which was dewy with youth, moist-looking, the clay still wet. ", "Obediently, the young nun gathered the linens from the couch. ", "Sister St. Saviour went with her to the vestibule and then watched her walk delicately down the stone stairs, the bundle held to one side so she could see her tiny feet as she descended. ", "The sky was colorless, as was the sidewalk and the street. ", "The cold fresh air was still tinged with the smell of smoke, or maybe the smell of smoke only lingered in the nostrils. ", "There were a few snowflakes in the air. ", "Sister Jeanne was very small and slight, even in her black cloak, but there was a firmness about her, a buoyancy perhaps, as she hurried away, the bundle in her arms, so much to do. ", "She was of an age, Sister St. Saviour understood, when tragedy was no less thrilling than romance.", "\n\nSister St. Saviour turned back into the apartment, peeked into the bedroom to whisper that she would return shortly, and then headed down the steps herself. ", "Sheen's funeral parlor was only eight blocks over.", "\n\nSister Jeanne felt the cold on her hands—her gloves were in her pockets, too late to reach them now—but she felt as well the blood drumming in her wrists and in her temples. ", "She felt her heart in her chest beating against the gathered bed linens as if she were running away with them. ", "Last night's grief had made the new day profound, true, but for Sister Jeanne the first hour of any day, the hour of _Lauds,_ was always the holiest. ", "It was the hour she felt closest to God, saw Him in the gathering light, in the new air, in the stillness of the street—shades were drawn and the shops shuttered—but also in the first stirrings of life. ", "There was the pleasant sound of a milk cart, tinkle of glass and clop of hooves, the sound of a few chirping songbirds, the call of distant gulls, of a streetcar down the avenue, a tugboat on the river, everything waking, beginning again. ", "Deep night frightened her beyond reason; she knew herself to be a heretic of superstitions and weird imaginings, but knowing this didn't stop the terror she could brew for herself when she woke to pray at 3 a.m. And the busy, crowded sunlight hours, filled with casework, hardly gave her a moment to raise her eyes. ", "Suppertime, ever since she'd come to the convent, was a calm that God need not enter, since the bread and the soup were always good and the company of the other women, tired from a long day of nursing, was sufficient to itself.", "\n\nBut it was at this hour, when the sun was a humming gold at the horizon, or a pale peach, or even just, as now, a gray pearl, that she felt the breath of God warm on her neck. ", "It was at this hour that the whole city smelled to her like the inside of a cathedral—damp stone and cold water and candle wax—and the sound of her steps on the sidewalk and over the five cross streets made her think of a priest approaching the altar in shined shoes. ", "Or of a bridegroom, perhaps, out of one of the romances she had read as a girl, all love and anticipation.", "\n\nSister Jeanne maneuvered her bundle through the wrought-iron gate at the front of the convent and climbed the steps to the front door. ", "The other nuns were just coming out of the chapel, and their stillness as they walked through the dark corridor, which was untouched, as yet, by the outside light, made her feel even more buoyantly aware of the life in her veins. ", "It was the feeling she'd had as a young child, coming from the sunshine into the solemn, shaded house and being warned, day after day, to keep her voice low because her mother, an invalid, was sleeping. ", "She fell in line behind the other Sisters and then turned with her bundle as they passed the basement stairs. ", "She went down. ", "Sister Illuminata, the laundress, followed on her heels. ", "The cellar was dark, full of shadows, although the pale morning was pressed against the small windows. ", "The basement at this hour smelled only faintly of soap, more profoundly of dirt and brick, the cold underground. ", "Somewhat breathlessly, Sister Jeanne told the story of the death and the fire and the baby coming, and the request Sister St. Saviour had made. ", "Unsmiling, Sister Illuminata took the sheets and blanket and counterpane from her arms. ", "She sent Sister Jeanne back up the stairs with the thrust of her chin. \"", "Bring Sister her breakfast,\" she said. \"", "And tell her it will be tomorrow, at best, before these things are dry. ", "Even if I hang them by the furnace.\"", "\n\nWhen Sister Jeanne returned, the snow had become steady and the sidewalk was somewhat slick with it. ", "She carried a broom and a bucket that contained both a scrub brush and the breakfast: a jar of tea, buttered bread, jam, all wrapped in a towel but rattling nevertheless inside the metal pail, a sound that added a quickness to her step and made some of the people she passed—the men mostly, who tipped their hats and said, \"Sister\"—smile to see her: a little nun with a pail and a broom and a determined walk. ", "As she reached the building, Sister Lucy was just coming down the steps, wrapping her cloak around her hips and pulling down the corners of her mouth, as if the two motions were somehow connected—some necessary accommodation to what Sister Jeanne saw immediately was her ferocious anger.", "\n\n\"She's got the body coming back tonight,\" Sister Lucy said, and added for emphasis, \"This evening. ", "For the wake. ", "And buried first thing tomorrow morning.\" ", "She shook her jowls. ", "She was a mannish, ugly woman, humorless, severe, but an excellent nurse. ", "Among the many helpful things she'd already taught Sister Jeanne was to notice the earlobes of the dying, first indication that the hour had come.", "\n\n\"Tomorrow!\" ", "Sister Lucy said again. \"", "Calvary—she's got it all arranged.\" ", "She shivered a bit, wrapped her cloak around her more tightly, and dropped her mouth into a longer frown. \"", "And why is she rushing him into the ground?\"", "\n\nThere was a yellow tint to her pupils, which were darting back and forth as they took in the rooftops and the icy snowflakes. \"", "I'll say only this,\" Sister Lucy declared. \"", "You can't pull strings with God.\" ", "She leveled her gaze and pulled again at her cloak. ", "Sister Jeanne thought of a painting she had seen, maybe in the courthouse or a post office, of a square-jawed general in the snow—was it George Washington?—his cloak drawn about him just so.", "\n\n\"You can't pull the wool over God's eyes,\" Sister Lucy said.", "\n\nSister Jeanne, the bucket in one hand and the broom in another, and the cold, for the first time this morning, whipping into her open cloak, turned somewhat gratefully to a woman who was passing on the sidewalk and saying, \"Good morning, Sisters.\" ", "She was a young woman bundled against the weather, a dark blue shawl wrapped around her broad hat, another thrown over her shoulders. ", "She was pushing a baby carriage. ", "A thin line of snow had gathered on the hood of the carriage, and there was a frosting of snow on the knuckles of her black gloves as well. ", "She was pregnant under her man's overcoat. ", "The nuns said, \"Good morning,\" with a bow, and Sister Jeanne moved to peer into the carriage. ", "She felt Sister Lucy, reluctantly, bending to look as well. ", "The baby inside was so swaddled in plaid wool there were only two placid eyes and a tiny nose and the dash of a pursed, thoughtful mouth. \"", "Oh, lovely!\" ", "Sister Jeanne cried. \"", "Snug as a bug in a rug.\"", "\n\n\"He likes the snow,\" the mother replied. ", "She was rosy-cheeked herself.", "\n\n\"He's watching it come down, isn't he?\" ", "Sister Jeanne said.", "\n\nSister Lucy also smiled. ", "It was only a small, tight smile, but mighty, considering the weight of the anger it had worked itself out from under. ", "She turned the smile toward the child and then the mother. ", "Once more, the snowflakes began to gather in her yellow lashes, and she narrowed her eyes against them. \"", "Is your husband good to you?\" ", "she asked.", "\n\nSister Jeanne briefly closed her eyes. ", "Her cheeks grew warm. ", "The young mother gave a short, startled laugh. \"", "Yes, Sister,\" she said. \"", "He is.\"", "\n\nSister Lucy raised her bare hand, one red finger in the air, and Sister Jeanne thought of General Washington again—or perhaps it was Napoleon. \"", "Has he got a good job?\"", "\n\n\"He does,\" the mother said. ", "She straightened her spine. \"", "He's a doorman at the St. Francis Hotel.\"", "\n\nSister nodded, barely placated. \"", "Do you live nearby?\" ", "she asked.", "\n\n\"Yes, Sister,\" she said. ", "She nodded over her shoulder. \"", "Just at 314. ", "Since last Saturday.\"", "\n\nNow Sister Lucy turned the finger toward the woman's heart. \"", "You come to see me,\" she said, \"if ever he's not good to you.\"", "\n\n\"He's good to me,\" the girl said again, laughing.", "\n\n\"We're in the convent on Fourth. ", "I'm Sister Lucy.\" ", "She swung her hand. \"", "This is Sister Jeanne. ", "You come see us if need be.\"", "\n\nThe woman gave a little curtsy, but began to move the carriage nonetheless. \"", "I will,\" she said. \"", "Good morning, Sisters.\"", "\n\nThe woman was only a few feet away when Sister Lucy said, \"If he was good to her, he might let her catch her breath before starting another child.\" ", "She blinked at the snowflakes that were trying to cover her eyes. \"", "He might think of her health instead of his pleasure.\"", "\n\nAll joy was thin ice to Sister Lucy.", "\n\nSister Jeanne bowed her head and studied for a minute the tips of their identical shoes. ", "Under the skim of cold on her cheeks she could still feel the rising heat.", "\n\n\"I'll go in, then,\" Sister Jeanne whispered, and turned to the steps.", "\n\n\"I'll try to get the word out,\" Sister Lucy called after her. \"", "I'll talk to Mr. Hennessey, who knows all the motormen. ", "But there's hardly time to gather a decent crowd, the way she's rushing things. ", "And only one night for the wake.\"", "\n\nSister Jeanne nodded without turning, going up the steps. ", "She had quite forgotten God was in the snow around her, in the cold and the wide sky; she had quite forgotten her pleasure in the day's work ahead. ", "She was thinking instead that they were well rid of Sister Lucy.", "\n\nA policeman and a fireman were conferring with another gentleman in the hallway by the stairs. ", "They all turned and nodded to the young nun as she came through the vestibule. ", "The door to the apartment was ajar and she let herself in. ", "In full, if weak, daylight, the room seemed nicer than it had last night, if only because now, with the curtains in the big picture window opened, it had the view of the snow to make it cheerful. ", "There was still the smell of smoke, but the smell of cleaning ammonia was now cut into it—the smell of the day going on. ", "She crossed the living room and entered the narrow corridor that was lined with two portraits of dour peasants and found Sister St. Saviour in the tiny kitchen. ", "Sister Jeanne placed the broom against the door and carried the bucket to the table where the old nun sat. ", "The kitchen had been well scrubbed, the only trace of the lady's interrupted dinner was the newspaper that had been folded beside her plate. ", "Sister St. Saviour now had it wide open before her.", "\n\nSister Jeanne poured the milky tea into a cup she borrowed from the cabinet and set it down. \"", "It's still awfully cold in here, Sister,\" she said.", "\n\nSister St. Saviour moved the cup closer without raising it. \"", "The men have just been in to turn on the gas,\" she said. \"", "I asked them to carry out a few things that were damaged in the fire. ", "They're going to wash the walls for me as well. ", "So we've made some progress.\"", "\n\nSister Jeanne took a plate from the cupboard, set out the buttered bread and jam.", "\n\n\"Mr. Sheen will get the body from the morgue this morning,\" Sister St. Saviour went on. \"", "First thing the lady wakes, she'll have to pick out his clothes. ", "You can run them over for me. ", "We've got a mass set for six tomorrow morning. ", "Then the cemetery. ", "The ground, praise God, isn't frozen. ", "It'll all be finished before the new day's begun.\"", "\n\n\"That's quick,\" Sister Jeanne said. ", "She hesitated and then added, \"Sister Lucy wonders why it's such a rush.\"", "\n\nSister St. Saviour only raised her eyes to the top of the newspaper. \"", "Sister Lucy,\" she said casually, \"has a big mouth.\"", "\n\nShe turned the opened newspaper over, to the front page, straightening the edges. ", "Then she touched her glasses. \"", "Here's a story,\" she said, and put her fingertip to the page. \"", "Mr. Sheen mentioned it to me this morning. ", "A man over in Jersey, playing billiards in his home, accidentally opened the gas tap in the room, with the pole they use, the cue, it says, and asphyxiated himself.\" ", "She raised her chin. \"", "His poor wife called him for dinner and found him gone.\" ", "The glasses made her dark eyes sparkle. \"", "Day before yesterday. ", "Mr. Sheen mentioned it to me this morning. ", "He was pointing out how common these things are. ", "These accidents with the gas.\"", "\n\nSister St. Saviour moved her finger up the page. \"", "And now here's a story of a suicide,\" she continued. \"", "On the same page. ", "Over on Wards Island. ", "A man being treated at the hospital over there, for madness. ", "It seems he was doing well enough, but then he threw himself into the water and disappeared. ", "At Hell Gate. ", "It says the water covered him up at Hell Gate.\" ", "She clucked her tongue. \"", "As if the devil needed to put a fine point on his work.\" ", "She moved her arm once again. ", "She might have been signing a blessing over the page. \"", "And here's another story of a Wall Street man gone insane. ", "Same day. ", "Throwing bottles into the street, bellowing. ", "Carted off to the hospital.\" ", "She leaned forward, reading, her finger on the page, \" 'Where he demanded to see J. P. Morgan and Colonel Roosevelt.'\"", "\n\nSister Jeanne leaned forward as well. \"", "Is it true?\" ", "she asked.", "\n\nSister St. Saviour laughed. \"", "True enough.\" ", "Her smile was as smooth as paint. \"", "The devil loves these short, dark days.\"", "\n\nSister Jeanne straightened her spine. ", "She sometimes feared that Sister St. Saviour was wobbly in her ways. ", "Hadn't she once said, on Sister Jeanne's first day in the convent, \"Could you go tinkle for me?\"", "\n\n\"Mr. Sheen told me,\" Sister St. Saviour went on, \"that he could show the article about the billiard man to anyone in the Church, or at the cemetery, in case there was a question. ", "To show how common these sorts of accidents are. ", "And how easily they could be misinterpreted. ", "This New Jersey man, after all, had come home early from work. ", "And closed the door. ", "Had he been a poor man, not a man with a billiard table at all, they might have made a different report out of it. ", "The rich can get whatever they want put into the papers.\"", "\n\nBy the time Mrs. Gertler returned to reclaim her apartment, Annie was up and dressed and sitting in a chair by the window with one of Sister Jeanne's handkerchiefs clutched in both hands.", "\n\nThe two nuns walked up the stairs with her, Sister Jeanne ahead and Sister St. Saviour just behind, her swollen ankles weighting each step with pain. ", "At the apartment door, it was Sister St. Saviour who stepped back so the girl could enter with the young nun at her side.", "\n\nAt four o'clock, the black hearse pulled up. ", "The three women watched from the bedroom window. ", "Mr. Sheen, elegant in his long overcoat, left the cab first and was the first to appear upstairs. ", "He was a tall man with the sharp nose and high cheekbones of an Indian chief, a pair of large, heavy-lidded eyes that couldn't have been better suited to his profession. ", "He swept off his hat and took the widow's two hands into his own and, with a quick look around the sparsely furnished room, suggested the lady and the two nuns might want to wait in the bedroom while he made his preparations. ", "Annie and Sister Jeanne sat together at the foot of the bed while Sister St. Saviour stood at the door. ", "They could hear Mr. Sheen giving instructions. ", "And then the unmistakable sound of the coffin being carried up the stairs, a bit of labored breathing, and the touch of the wooden casket against the doorframe. ", "And then Mr. Sheen rapped on the bedroom door to say all was ready.", "\n\nThe husband's face was pale and waxen, but it was, nevertheless, a lovely face. ", "Boyish and solemn above the starched white collar, with a kind of youthful stubbornness about it as well. ", "The look of a child, Sister St. Saviour thought, when met with the spoon of castor oil.", "\n\nWhile Annie and Sister Jeanne knelt, Sister St. Saviour blessed herself and considered the sin of her deception, slipping a suicide into hallowed ground. ", "A man who had rejected his life, the love of this brokenhearted girl, the child coming to them in the summer. ", "She said to God, who knew her thoughts, Hold it against me if You will. ", "He could put this day on the side of the ledger where all her sins were listed: the hatred she felt for certain politicians, the money she stole from her own basket to give out as she pleased—to a girl with a raging clap, to the bruised wife of a drunk, to the mother of the thumb-sized infant she had wrapped in a clean handkerchief, baptized, and then buried in the convent garden. ", "All the moments of how many days when her compassion failed, her patience failed, when her love for God's people could not outrun the girlish alacrity of her scorn for their stupidity, their petty sins.", "\n\nShe wanted him buried in Calvary to give comfort to his poor wife, true. ", "To get the girl what she'd paid for. ", "But she also wanted to prove herself something more than a beggar, to test the connections she'd forged in this neighborhood, forged over a lifetime. ", "She wanted him buried in Calvary because the power of the Church wanted him kept out and she, who had spent her life in the Church's service, wanted him in.", "\n\nHold it against the good I've done, she prayed. ", "We'll sort it out when I see You.", "\n\nOnly a few neighbors came to call, every one of them a little restrained in sympathy, given the unspoken notion that the son of a bitch could have taken them all with him. ", "A trio of red-faced motormen stopped by, but stayed only a minute when no drink was offered. ", "Later, the two nuns walked Mr. Sheen downstairs in order to give the girl some time alone with her husband. ", "At the curb, he reached into the cab of the hearse and pulled out the day's newspaper. ", "He folded back a page and tapped a narrow article. ", "Sister St. Saviour leaned forward to read, Sister Jeanne at her elbow. ", "In the descending light of the cold evening, the blur of a misting rain and a rising fog, the two could just make out the headline: SUICIDE ENDANGERS OTHERS. ", "It was followed by the full report of the fire and the man's death by his own hand. \"", "There's nothing to be done, Sister,\" Mr. Sheen whispered. \"", "Now that it's in the paper, there's not a Catholic cemetery that will have him. ", "I'll have my head handed to me on a plate if I try to bring him into the church.\"", "\n\nTo Sister Jeanne's eyes, the black newsprint, especially the bold headline that seemed to swell and blur under the blow of each raindrop, briefly transformed the world itself into a thing made of paper, pocked by tears.", "\n\nBut Sister St. Saviour pushed the undertaker's hand away. ", "She thought of the rude young man with the milk tooth and the gray fedora. ", "Her glasses flashed under the just-illuminated lamplight. \" _", "The New York Times_ ,\" she said, \"has a big mouth.\"", "\n\nThe two nuns climbed the stairs again. ", "Sister St. Saviour was aware of how patiently little Sister Jeanne paused with her on each step, a hand raised to offer aid. ", "Inside, they coaxed the sobbing girl up off her knees and into the bed. ", "It was Sister Jeanne who took over then—no weariness in her narrow shoulders, no indication at all that she felt the tedium of too much sympathy for a stranger. ", "With Annie settled, Sister Jeanne told Sister St. Saviour to go back to the convent to rest. ", "She whispered that she would keep vigil through the long night and have the lady ready first thing in the morning.", "\n\n\"Ready for what?\" ", "Sister St. Saviour asked her, attempting to gauge how much the young nun understood—suspecting not much. \"", "There will be no mass.\" ", "Her pain, her bone-through fatigue, made her voice sharper than she knew.", "\n\nYoung Sister Jeanne looked up at the nun, moisture once more gathering in her pretty eyes. ", "She said, with childish determination, \"I'll have her ready for whatever's to come.\"", "\n\nSister St. Saviour left the two of them murmuring in the bedroom. ", "At the casket, she paused again to look at the young man's still face. ", "She went to the window in the kitchen and looked down into that purgatory of the backyards. ", "At this hour, there was nothing to be seen. ", "All movement, all life, was in the lighted windows above: a man at a table, a child with a bedside lamp, a young woman walking an infant to and fro.", "\n\nOf course, it was Sister Jeanne who would be here when the baby arrived come summer.", "\n\nIt was Sister Jeanne who had been sent for.", "\n\nThe old nun felt a beggar's envy rise to her throat. ", "She envied little Jeanne, true enough—a new sin for her side of the ledger—envied her faith and her determination and her easy tears. ", "But she envied as well the coming dawn, _Lauds_ , still so many hours away. ", "She envied the very daylight, envied every woman who would walk out into it, bustling, bustling, one foot in front of the other, no pain weighting her steps, so much to do.", "\n\nConfident of heaven—God knew her failings—Sister St. Saviour was, nevertheless, even now, jealous of life.", "\n\nShe turned from the cold glass, turned as well a cold shoulder to the God who had brought her here so that Jeanne would follow. ", "It was the way a bitter old wife might turn her back on a faithless husband.", "\n\nThe baby, a daughter, was born in August, just three weeks after the old nun died. ", "She was called Sally, but baptized St. Saviour in honor of the Sister's kindness that sad afternoon. ", "That damp and gray afternoon when the pilot went out. ", "When our young grandfather, a motorman for the BRT whose grave we have never found, sent his wife to do her shopping while he had himself a little nap.", "\nAnd Then\n\nOur father rode sitting upright in the high baby carriage, like a boy in a small boat. ", "It was his first memory. ", "Displaced as he'd been from the shade under the perambulator's hood, occupied now by yet another bundled infant, he spread out his arms and clutched the sides of the carriage: a boy in a storm-tossed rowboat. ", "His mother, pushing the thing, was behind him. ", "She navigated the broken sidewalks, the curbs, and the street crossings with a banging determination that caused the whole contraption—high wheels and springs and the hard black body of the carriage itself—to shudder and quake, rearing at the curbs, bucking at the cobblestones, swinging left or right around poky pedestrians, dog droppings, the spilled contents of fruit markets, dry-goods stores, garbage cans. ", "He rode every undulation, every swerve, with his spine straight, his arms outspread, and his hands fixed tightly around the gunwales of the carriage bed. ", "He looked straight on. ", "There were trees and cars, dustbins and lampposts on the left; on the right, buildings, gray stone and brick, with stoops and children and speared fence tops, but he kept his eyes glued to the horizon that began just above the arc of the black hood, focusing on the world ahead like a sea captain navigating an ice storm. ", "He was petrified.", "\n\nAt his back, his mother out for a stroll. ", "Although the word hardly accommodated her perpetual haste, her determined plowing-through. ", "Beside her, his brother trotted along, holding on to her skirt. ", "She leaned her weight against the handlebar and brought the front of the carriage up in the air—he was tipped backward and the horizon became treed—and then she lifted the back wheels—tipping him forward, a hint of gray sidewalk aiming for his skull—as they mounted another curb. ", "Now shade covered them all, as if there had been a lowering of clouds, and she slowed her pace. ", "Smoothly, shadowy, another baby carriage, the silent black ghost galleon he knew somehow had been following them all the while, pulled alongside. ", "He heard his mother's voice, and the answering voice of another woman, as they passed into the smooth stream of the park. ", "The conversation itself, an ongoing exchange, rippled with laughter, another smooth stream. ", "It did not soothe him. ", "He kept his back straight, his fingers locked on the edges of the carriage bed. ", "He looked ahead, aware only peripherally of the other strollers, the passing trees and shade, the shadows of the perambulators and of the two women pushing them. ", "He remained vigilant.", "\n\nThere was the duet of the women's voices, some birdsong, the faint cawing of a crow or a cat. ", "Every once in a while, despite the curbless paths, the carriage beneath him shuddered abruptly—a jiggling, a pause, a jiggling again. ", "He tightened his grip, braced his arms. ", "He peered down a tarred lane of dappled sunlight, a busy sidewalk at the far end. ", "And then the slowing of the wheels. ", "The sound of cat or crow was not distant at all but rose from beneath the black hoods of the two carriages. ", "In tandem, the women, his mother and her silhouetted friend, paused. ", "His mother walked past him, his older brother still attached to her skirt. ", "She leaned down to reach beneath the hood and lifted out a swaddled infant no bigger than a loaf of bread. ", "The other woman did the same. ", "Recently, his mother had been delivered of twins. ", "And then, as she rocked this new scrap of child on her shoulder, and her friend did the same, he turned his head just a few inches more and was met, as if in mirror reflection, with the face of another child, sitting up just as he was, her small hands, as his were, gripping the sides of the black carriage, holding on, holding on. ", "Vigilant like himself, he saw. ", "Erect and terrified, like himself.", "\n\nShe was dressed in white wool: bonnet, coat, and leggings, which was a flaw in the memory, since it must have been high summer. ", "He stared at her, she stared back with wide eyes. ", "He said to himself, There's the girl I'll marry.", "\n\nIt was the nuns who got the two mothers walking together. ", "Or Sister Lucy did, anyway. ", "Sister Lucy, who could insist.", "\n\nShe had finagled a lovely baby carriage from a well-to-do couple on President Street, an older couple whose first and only child hadn't lived past infancy. ", "Then she went with Sister Jeanne to 314, to the doorman's wife, to say there's a widow down the street with a new baby. \"", "Put on your hat and go pay her a call.\" ", "Still standing at the threshold, Sister Lucy cast an assessing eye around Mrs. Tierney, to the cluttered apartment behind her, then to the chapped cheeks of the baby on her hip, then over the woman herself, who was dressed in a bungalow apron of pale percale, a damp stain, mother's milk perhaps, on her chest. ", "There was a baby bawling in another room. \"", "Fix yourself up,\" Sister Lucy added, \"and have a nice visit.\"", "\n\nMrs. Tierney smiled. ", "She asked for the lady's name and address. ", "Said she would be certain to visit her sometime soon.", "\n\nSister Lucy said, \"Why not now? ", "We'll watch the children while you go.\"", "\n\nAt the nun's side, Sister Jeanne blushed apologetically, shrugged, and then held out her hands to the little boy in Mrs. Tierney's arms. ", "Mrs. Tierney felt his body, the weight of him, tilt toward the nun as if a magnet drew him.", "\n\nAnd then she laughed. ", "Invited the Sisters in.", "\n\nGoing to and from the park—hot weather or cold, snow or stifling humidity, only a hard rain ever kept them indoors—the two young mothers negotiated the crowded streets like impatient empresses. ", "Together, they returned Elizabeth Tierney's boys and the twin girls to her apartment and then together carried both unwieldy carriages up the steep stone steps. ", "Let other mothers park their baby carriages in alleyways and courtyards, beside garbage cans and under stairs. ", "Not these two.", "\n\nCompared to Annie's sparse rooms, Mrs. Tierney's place was a carnival of cribs and trundle beds, clothes and washbins and dirty plates. ", "Each morning, the dining room table was filled with sticky glasses and piled saucers and ashtrays crowded with cigarette butts and cigar stubs, because Michael, her husband, liked a gathering of men in the evening. \"", "His cronies,\" Mrs. Tierney called them—his coworkers mostly, doormen and bellhops and waiters who hailed, she said, from \"all corners of the earth.\" \"", "The more the merrier,\" she said. ", "Despite the mess of glasses and plates, the lingering smell of cigar smoke that competed with the odors of wet laundry and dirty diapers, she said it with the same amused, eye-rolling fondness that she applied to everything that had to do with her husband, who was no immigrant himself but the well-spoken son of a schoolteacher from up near Poughkeepsie. ", "Whose family had disowned him, she said, for \"coming down in the world\" to marry her.", "\n\nWith the two big black carriages secured in the narrow hallway of Elizabeth Tierney's apartment and her babies settled into them once more, Annie and her daughter left the jumbled household each morning for the peace and the order of the Little Nursing Sisters' convent, where she had been given work in the basement laundry.", "\n\nSister St. Saviour had arranged it. ", "Before her last illness, the old nun had slipped a note beneath the feet of the Virgin—via her statue in the convent's front garden—requesting that sufficient funds be found to pay the girl's salary. \"", "Somehow, dear Mother.\" ", "The women of the convent's Ladies Auxiliary found the note—they checked the statue daily—and presented the petition to their members. ", "The Ladies Auxiliary of the convent of the Little Nursing Sisters of the Sick Poor, Congregation of Mary Before the Cross, consisted mostly of idle Catholic women married to successful men. ", "As Sister St. Saviour well understood, they felt a particular there-but-for-the-grace-of-God affinity for impoverished young widows.", "\n\nOut of the funds the Ladies Auxiliary provided, the nuns paid Annie eighteen dollars a week, and fed her, and her daughter when she was weaned, a breakfast and a lunch. ", "It was, all agreed, a fine situation for a widow with an infant. ", "A wicker basket was fitted with towels and a pillowslip, and the baby slept at her mother's feet while she washed and sewed and helped Sister Illuminata with the ironing.", "\n\nAs the child grew, the nuns added a donated crib, and then a small Persian rug, another donation, to cover a bit of the damp basement floor. ", "There were scraps of cloth and empty spools for the child to play with, and the ducks and dogs Sister Illuminata carved from Ivory soap—an annoyance for Annie, since she had to remain vigilant in order to keep the girl from putting them into her mouth or her eyes, but nothing she could refuse, given Sister Illuminata's pride in her own whittling and the child's delight each time the nun produced a new figure from her robes.", "\n\nThe work itself was endless. ", "Every day, donated clothing arrived at the convent, clothing for the poor, which had to be sorted and washed and mended. ", "There were as well the stained bedclothes of the sick: sheets and blankets and pillowcases, diapers, towels, handkerchiefs, all brought home from the households where the Sisters were nursing. ", "In any idle moment, there were bandages to make, worn bed sheets to be sterilized and rolled and placed neatly into the satchels each Sister carried to her casework.", "\n\nThere was also, every week, the routine washing and ironing of the convent linen and the Sisters' habits, the black serge tunics and short capes—the application of thick starch and the heated iron to their bibs and their bonnets. ", "Whatever troubles the Sisters encountered in their daily work were illustrated by the stains on an apron or a sleeve—the odor of vomit on wool, a spattering of blood across a white bib. ", "What troubles the Sisters' mortal bodies produced of their own accord were evident in the unending menstrual rags and long johns stained yellow at underarm or crotch. ", "When Annie arrived in the morning, her first task was to empty the overnight soaking bin—the water pink with blood. ", "And then the trip upstairs to the convent kitchen, to boil some water for the first wash, and while she waited, a cup of tea and a bun and a pleasant time of day with Mrs. Odette, the convent's cook, another widow from the neighborhood, or, if she'd arrived early enough, a laugh or two with Mr. Costello, the milkman.", "\n\nIn the basement, the low-hanging light was dim, the dark brick walls clammy to the touch. ", "All day long there was the sound of agitated wash water, of the wringer's torturous crank and squeak, the hiss and thud of Sister Illuminata's black iron. ", "In winter there was as well the bump and moan of the convent's fiery furnace. ", "In summer, through the high opened windows, the chants of jump-rope songs, the organ grinder, the cries of boys playing ball in the street.", "\n\nIn every season, the changing daylight found its way into all corners of the cellar. ", "Sometimes it was a discouraging gray in the morning, but a buoyant display of yellow and gold by the time the chapel bell was rung at three. ", "Sometimes only the earliest hours illuminated the place, and when evening came a muffled darkness pressed against the electric lights.", "\n\nAt various times there was the smell of wet wool, bleach, vinegar, turpentine, pine soap, and starch.", "\n\nOn damp days, they hung the clothes and the linens from lines strung between the basement's iron support beams. ", "When the weather was fine, they brought the wash out to the convent yard.", "\n\nThere was, each day, the clear and certain restoration of order: fresh linens folded, stains gone, tears mended.", "\n\nSister Illuminata was a wizard with a hot iron and starch, with scrub brush and bleach. ", "On four dark shelves in a corner of her basement domain, she kept a laboratory's worth of vital ingredients: not merely the store-bought Borax and Ivory and bluing agents, but the potions she mixed herself: bran water to stiffen curtains and wimples, alum water to make muslin curtains and nightwear resist fire, brewed coffee to darken the Sisters' stockings and black tunics, Fels-Naptha water for general washing, Javelle water (washing soda, chloride of lime, boiling water) for restoring limp fabric. ", "She had an encyclopedic understanding of how to treat stains. ", "Tea: Borax and cold water. ", "Ink: milk, salt, and lemon juice. ", "Iodine: chloroform. ", "Iron rust: hydrochloric acid. ", "Mucus: ammonia and soap. ", "Mucus tinged with blood (which she always greeted with a sign of the cross): salt and cold water.", "\n\nIn Sister Illuminata's unyielding routine, each item received two washings: inside out and then right side out, then a pass through the mangle, then another soaping, a boiling, another rinse, another wringing. ", "If the garments were to be blued, then a rinse again in cold water to avoid rust stains. ", "Wrung again, then starched, then hung to dry. ", "Sister Illuminata would not allow the courtyard clothesline to be left out in the weather; she tied it up each morning and took it down again at the end of every bright day. ", "She washed the clothespins themselves once a month. ", "With sacred solemnity, Sister Illuminata demonstrated for Annie how a garment should be properly shaken and hung (chemises and shirts by the hem, pillowslips inside out and by the seam, with the wind, never against it). ", "She demonstrated the precise way to sprinkle and roll what was newly dried, and how to pound the rolled fabric in order to distribute the moisture. ", "The ironing was Sister Illuminata's special domain. ", "She had four different irons of various sizes, which she washed on occasion in soap and water, then rubbed with sandstone and polished, lovingly, with beeswax.", "\n\nSister Illuminata was shrill in her demands, unbending in her routine; any washing Annie attempted during her first few weeks in the nuns' employ was dismissed as a mere \"lick and a promise.\" ", "Sister Illuminata had never asked them to send her an assistant.", "\n\nShe was a solid, plain, wide-bottomed woman. ", "The pale skin of her cheeks and her forehead and her chin was crepe-thin; it hung like crepe over the edge of her white coif. ", "Her hands were always a raw, bright red, her right index finger marked with the shining oval of a testing-the-iron scar. ", "Except for the time she spent in the chapel, Sister Illuminata was always moving, her sleeves rolled up, her veil tied back. ", "She was bending over the washbasin or feeding wet clothes into the cranking wringer, or ironing, ironing—this was the area of her greatest expertise—throwing her whole body into it, elbows and back and hips.", "\n\nSister Illuminata flicked her wet fingers over the cloth as if to douse a sinner. ", "She thumped the black iron against the wooden board, thumped and lifted and thumped and shook—the steam rising—as if each piece she pressed involved some feat of determination and strength, a mortal struggle. ", "Her elbows flared in the wide sleeves, her nostrils flared in her beaked nose. ", "She called sharply to Annie to say, \"Come here and learn something. ", "This is a trick my mother had . . .\" ", "She ran the point of the iron—\"See, like this\"—along a perfect seam. \"", "My mother,\" she said, \"was a marvel.\"", "\n\nHer mother, she said, had been a laundress in Dublin. ", "A profession the Sisters of Mercy had found for her when she first came to the city as a young girl. ", "She died of cancer when Sister Illuminata was just twenty. ", "In her last suffering months, it was the nursing Sisters of the parish who offered comfort and care. ", "Sister Illuminata entered their noviate a year later and emigrated to the States at thirty. ", "But a bout of tuberculosis put an end to her own nursing days. ", "She spent eight months at a sanatorium upstate, and when she returned, she was left to live out her vocation \"down here.\"", "\n\nDown here, in the basement of the convent, amid the dampness and the rising steam, the baby asleep in her crib, the sheets or long johns hung out on the line, Sister Illuminata called to Annie to say, Come and learn something. ", "She said, My mother was a marvel at this . . . ", "or, My mother had a trick. ", "She told Annie, Here's how my mother turned a collar, mended a cuff, starched linen, sized, stretched, bleached . . . ", "my mother did it this way . . . ", "my mother taught me this.", "\n\nThe phrase giving way to the stories, as the weeks and months went by: and then my mother left the farm and made her way to the city, where the Sisters of Mercy took her under their wing . . . ", "and then it was my mother they called on, his Lordship himself being the one whose britches were in need of repair . . .", "\n\nAnd then my mother found herself a widow with a small child, just like you . . . ", "and then she took me into the laundry with her, just like you do.", "\n\nDown here, Annie knew, the words were a kind of contraband. ", "None of the Sisters, in those days, spoke of their lives before the convent, in what they dismissively called the world. ", "To take their vows was to leave all else behind: girlhoods and families and friends, all of love that was merely personal, all of life that required a backward glance. ", "The white horse-blinder bonnets they wore did more than limit their peripheral vision. ", "They reminded the Sisters to look only at the work at hand.", "\n\nAnnie imagined how silently the days must have passed for Sister Illuminata during all the years she had labored down here in the convent basement alone, without an assistant, and, imagining this—recalling as well her own loneliness each silent, weary evening—she swallowed her anger at the nun's shrill demands. ", "She swallowed as well the woman's insults—a lick and a promise—her implacable routines. ", "Annie turned her face into her shoulder whenever Sister Illuminata was cross, when even a blessed saint would have been compelled to whisper, \"Damn bitch.\"", "\n\nAnd she lied, saying in all innocence, \"No, I never heard it,\" when Sister Illuminata began again the story of how her mother repaired the britches of a magistrate or encountered a dray horse in the drying yard or saved the life of another laundress's child who had swallowed a fistful of alum—forty, fifty years ago this was, although as fresh in Sister Illuminata's telling, and retelling, as if it all had happened just this morning, just upstairs, in the world above their heads.", "\n\nOn an afternoon in early summer, when Sally was not yet two, Annie and the nun sat together in silence, the baby on the bit of rug between them. ", "They were sorting through a collection of donated clothes, sorting, examining, determining what could be washed and mended and brought to the poor from what was bound for rags, or, if there was evidence of moths or lice, the incinerator. ", "Because the nuns allowed Annie first choice in this—wasn't she the poor, after all?—most of her daughter's clothes came from these donation baskets, and not a few blouses and skirts for herself.", "\n\nWhich may well account for the white wool coat and leggings and bonnet our father so vividly recalled. ", "A winter ensemble too fine to resist and too perfect a fit to save for cold weather.", "\n\nSuddenly Sally let out a shriek and began to wail, a fist to her eye. ", "Annie dropped the moth-eaten shawl she'd been holding up to the light and went to her knees beside the child. ", "Sister Illuminata leaned forward. ", "The girl was red-faced and screaming. \"", "Something in her eye,\" Sister said, and Annie tried to move the child's fist away. ", "Sally resisted. ", "She was clutching something in her balled hand. \"", "Let me see it, darling,\" she coaxed. ", "But the girl wouldn't budge. ", "She twisted her arm away from her mother, grew desperate, even as she screwed the balled fist against her face. ", "It was a piece of white soap. ", "Annie saw that the smallest of Sister's carved ducks was on the rug beside the child, decapitated. ", "The girl was pressing the tiny severed head into her eye. \"", "Give it to me, darling,\" Annie said. \"", "You're hurting yourself.\" ", "With some effort, she pulled the girl's fist away from her face, but she could not coax her to open her hand. ", "Sister Illuminata, meanwhile, was fetching a wet cloth. ", "She handed it to Annie. ", "On her mother's lap, the child was still crying, but still clutching as well the offending piece of soap. ", "Annie put the wet towel over the soap-stung eye. ", "Gently, Sister Illuminata tried to take the soap from the girl's fist, and once again the child pulled away. ", "She would not give it up.", "\n\n\"Oh, she's stubborn,\" Annie whispered. \"", "She's not going to give in.\" ", "And then she added, \"She gets that from Jim.\"", "\n\nSister Illuminata leaned over them both, broad in her habit and her apron, which was slightly damp. ", "She put a raw red hand to the child's fine hair. \"", "Jim,\" the nun said firmly, \"gets the credit, then. ", "She'll never be a pushover.\"", "\n\nLater that same day, when the smell of the Sisters' dinner wafted down the stairs, Annie heard herself say, \"Jim would never eat a turnip.\" ", "Later still, when a heat wave struck the city, \"Jim was never a drinker, thank God, but he'd take a beer on a day like today.\" ", "When Sally, growing up, grew silent around strangers, \"Jim had a shyness about him, too. ", "The first time we met, I wondered if he was ever going to say a word.\"", "\n\nIn the dank basement laundry of the convent, Annie said, \"Jim had a good voice, but he preferred a silly song to a ballad, which drove me mad.\" ", "She said, \"Jim had a friend who wore shoes like that.\" ", "She said, \"Jim couldn't abide a tight collar.\" ", "She said, Jim was, Jim preferred, Jim told me once.", "\n\nMrs. Tierney was full of fond stories about her exasperating husband, but on their morning walks, decorum and superstition kept both women silent about Annie's loss. ", "The people who had seen him in life, neighbors and friends, lowered their eyes whenever she passed them in the hallway or on the street. ", "Sister St. Saviour was gone. ", "And Sister Jeanne, who knew all, kept all in her heart.", "\n\nHis name, too, then, a kind of contraband. ", "Jim was, Jim preferred, Jim told me once. ", "But down here in the convent laundry, she spoke it as casually as she might have done if he still stirred about in the world upstairs. ", "As if she were still a woman with an exasperating husband, no widow alone with a child. ", "And Sister Illuminata listened, sympathetically, as any maiden friend of a married lady might do.", "\n\nSally was six years old when, looking up from a set of paper dolls that had arrived in the donation basket, she asked, \"Who's Jim?\"", "\n\nShe was nine when it occurred to her to wonder where her father was buried. ", "Her mother only put her hand to her heart and said, \"Here.\"", "\n\nShe was nearly eleven when she came home from school with the delightful tale of a schoolmate's visit to a father's grave—a trolley ride, a lovely picnic on the green grass. ", "Her mother threw back her head and said, laughing, \"Let him come to us.\"", "\n\nThe sound of her mother's laughter always startled and thrilled the girl. ", "She smiled, put her hand to her mother's broad cheek. ", "Mistook the joke for a promise.", "\nThe Ninth Hour\n\nIn the horarium of the convent's life, afternoon prayers were said at three. ", "Any Sisters who were not tied up with casework or alms-seeking returned to the convent then.", "\n\nMuch later, when the arthritis in her knees got the best of her and her days were spent in a chair behind the ironing board, Sister Illuminata would only raise her eyes to the ceiling and, blessing herself, silently pray, but in the years of Sally's childhood, she stopped what she was doing at the sound of the bell, dried her hands, rolled down her sleeves, and ponderously climbed the wooden stairs. ", "Annie, finishing up some folding or mending, listened for the sound of the nuns' prayers, the psalms, the hymn, then for the sound of Sister Illuminata's return—breath short, beads clacking. ", "And then, as Sister Illuminata settled back into her work, Annie would listen again, hopeful, for another, lighter step on the stairs. ", "On the best days, she would look up to see Sister Jeanne bending over the banister, laughing like a child to find them there.", "\n\n\"Reprieved!\" ", "Sister Illuminata would declare whenever the young nun appeared. ", "There was no keeping the resentment out of her voice. \"", "Curfew will not ring tonight,\" she would add, pouting and jealous, but also, with the next thought, forgiving the two young women their clear delight in one another. ", "Like is drawn to like, after all, and Sister Illuminata had been young once herself, arm and arm with one narrow, grimy, funny girl, Mary Pat Shea. ", "She could recall the strong grip of Mary Pat's arm, the boggy smell of her, the freckles and dirty fingernails and shining green eyes, the muscular, lithe, little body beside her own. ", "Sister Illuminata had, in another lifetime, known that same delight.", "\n\n\"Do you need a breath of fresh air?\" ", "Sister Jeanne might ask. ", "Or, \"Do you want to run out and get yourself a soda?\" \"", "Do you want to do some shopping?\"", "\n\nThis routine, too, had begun at Sister Lucy's insistence. ", "In the early days of Annie's work at the convent, when Sally was still an infant, Sister Lucy put her eyes on Sister Jeanne as they left the chapel after the Ninth Hour prayer. \"", "If you're free this afternoon, go downstairs and take over with the baby,\" she told her. ", "Sister Lucy could insist. \"", "Let the mother go out and catch her breath.\"", "\n\n\"Do you mind?\" ", "Annie always asked, looking up at the little nun, laughing despite the way Sister Illuminata, jealous and pouting, was abruptly rolling back her sleeves or sucking her scarred fingertip.", "\n\nAnd Sister Jeanne would skip down the stairs. \"", "Do I mind?\" ", "as if the question couldn't be more absurd.", "\n\nWith her clasped hands to her heart, holding back her crucifix, Sister Jeanne peered into the wicker laundry basket where Sally slept or, as the child grew, hiked up her skirt to join her on the floor for whatever game she had devised out of soap animals and scraps of cloth and empty spools of thread.", "\n\nThe girl delighted her. ", "In fact, every child delighted Sister Jeanne. ", "She was a practical nurse without formal training, and what skills she had were sometimes limited by her size and her strength, but her way with children was astonishing. ", "Perhaps because, even in full habit, she seemed to be one of them: small and soft-spoken and easily given to laughter or tears, but also with a kind of sly skepticism in her eyes whenever she raised her chin to attend to some tall adult. ", "A skepticism it seemed only the children could perceive, and share. ", "Sister Jeanne need only turn her face from some serious, long-winded grown-up, a parent, a priest, a doctor, even one of the other nuns, to the child in the room and some understanding was established. ", "It's all silliness, isn't it?—her eyes alone could convey. ", "Let's not let them know we know.", "\n\nDidn't she do as much for us?", "\n\nBecause of her small size and her talent with little ones, more often than not the casework Sister Jeanne was given was very sad: sick children, failing newborns, toddlers neglected or abused or abandoned. ", "Her expertise was in the eradication of scabies, ringworm, lice, the application of castor oil and poultices, the cleaning of ears and the soothing of tears. ", "Sister Jeanne knew the route to the various Brooklyn orphanages, or to the Foundling Home in Manhattan, better than any of the others. ", "It was often her task to accompany the children there, sometimes from the gate of a cemetery, sometimes from the court or the station house, sometimes from the very room where the poor mother, newly cold, still lay, the gamy odor of death already encroaching on the still air.", "\n\nOut on the street with her charges, Sister Jeanne could make the trip an enchantment for the trembling little ones, pulling sugar cubes from her deep pockets or leaning down to point out something, or someone, that would make them laugh. ", "She could negotiate the subway stairs and the crowded streets with a sleeping newborn tucked into the crook of her arm. ", "And always—always, the Sister who accompanied her would report to the others—Sister Jeanne made the trip back to the convent in snuffling tears.", "\n\nWhat Sister Jeanne struggled to keep in balance was the sorrow she felt at the suffering of the sick and her own perpetual wonder at the miracle of the healthy. ", "Sally was healthy—nine pounds when she was born and strong-limbed and rosy-cheeked as a toddler and young girl—and Sister Jeanne looked forward to seeing her in the basement laundry after a sad day with a failing child or a grieving mother, if only to assure herself that God was, after all, as generous with good health as He was with bad.", "\n\nShe would hike up her skirt and join the girl on the small Persian rug, relishing her plump hands and bright eyes, her cleverness—by four she knew the name of every nun in the convent—her rapid growth; reassuring herself that the consumptive girl whose death she had recently attended was now restored in heaven with this same robust beauty. ", "Telling herself that the poor mother's wailing sorrow would be transformed, not now, but soon—life was like the blink of an eye—into Annie's same joy as she took her healthy daughter into her arms here in the streaming afternoon light and said, \"I'll be back in a jiff.\"", "\n\n\"Take your time,\" Sister Jeanne would say or, quoting Sister Lucy, \"Go catch your breath,\" which made them both laugh.", "\n\nWhen Annie had gone, Sister Jeanne and the child climbed the stairs. (\"", "No, I'll be fine,\" Sister Illuminata might call after them. \"", "Still so much to do. ", "You'll have to send my supper down.\") ", "They stopped into the pretty chapel to kneel together and say their prayers. ", "They went to the kitchen for some biscuits and a glass of milk, or—if it was far enough before dinner preparations were to begin—to mix up a pudding or a fool. ", "When the weather was fine, they'd go out to the convent yard, where they'd dig in the garden with a spade and an old spoon. ", "When it rained, they sat in the elegant parlor and said a rosary—Sister Jeanne making a fairy story of sorts out of each of the Mysteries—the girl counting the nun's beads and, more often than not, drifting to sleep beside her.", "\n\nIt was on these damp afternoons, in their brief and unaccustomed idleness, that Sister Jeanne considered Jim.", "\n\nSister Jeanne believed with the conviction of an eye witness that all human loss would be restored: the grieving child would have her mother again; the dead infant would find robust health; suffering, sorrow, accident, and loss would all be amended in heaven. ", "She believed this because, because (and she only possessed the wherewithal to explain this to children—trying to say it to angry or grieving or bitter adults only left her tongue-tied), because fairness demanded it.", "\n\nIt was, to her mind, a simple proposition. ", "The madness with which suffering was dispersed in the world defied logic. ", "There was nothing else like it for unevenness. ", "Bad luck, bad health, bad timing. ", "Innocent children were afflicted as often as bad men. ", "Young mothers were struck down even as old ones fretfully lingered. ", "Good lives ended in confusion or despair or howling devastation. ", "The fortunate went blissfully about their business until that moment when fortune vanished—a knock on the door, a cough, a knife flash, a brief bit of inattention. ", "A much-longed-for baby slid into the world only to grow blue and limp in its mother's arms. ", "Another arrived lame, or ill-formed, or simply too hungry for a frail woman already overwhelmed. ", "There was a child in the next parish with a skull so twisted his mouth couldn't close, and every breath he took, every word he spoke, even his childish laughter, rattled through dry and swollen lips. ", "Another with a birthmark like a purple caul. ", "Blindness. ", "Beatings. ", "Broken or bent bones. ", "Accident, decay. ", "Cruelty of nature. ", "Cruelty of bad men. ", "Idiocy, madness.", "\n\nThere was no accounting for it.", "\n\nNo accounting for how general it was, how arbitrary.", "\n\nSister Jeanne believed that fairness demanded this chaos be righted. ", "Fairness demanded that grief should find succor, that wounds should heal, insult and confusion find recompense and certainty, that every living person God had made should not, willy-nilly, be forever unmade.", "\n\n\"You know what's fair and what isn't, don't you?\" ", "Sister Jeanne would ask the sick child, the grieving orphan, Sally herself when she was old enough to understand the question. ", "And us.", "\n\n\"And how do you know?\"", "\n\nSister Jeanne would put a fingertip to the child's forehead, to the child's beating heart. \"", "Because God put the knowledge in you before you were born. ", "So you'd know fairness when you see it. ", "So you'd know He intends to be fair.\"", "\n\n\"Who's the dumbest boy in your class?\" ", "she once asked us. ", "This was in the Hempstead house where we were young. \"", "And if the teacher's dividing up sweets and gives him only one while everyone else gets two, what will he say? ", "He'll say it's not fair, won't he? ", "If you call him out playing ball when everyone can see he's safe by a mile, what will he say—dumb as he is in school? ", "He'll say it's not fair, see? ", "And how does he know? ", "Did he learn what's fair from a book? ", "Did he take a test? ", "No, he did not.\"", "\n\nOn the night of Jim's wake, Sister Jeanne moved two chairs from the dining table to the side of his coffin. ", "With Sister St. Saviour gone wearily back to the convent, she and Annie alone kept the long vigil. ", "Sister Jeanne took out her beads, but she did not pray, and when Annie reached for her hand, Sister Jeanne found she could put no comfort in her grip. ", "There was the newspaper article Mr. Sheen had held out for them to read, under the rain and the sad lamplight.", "\n\nThere was the logic of redemption, all undone.", "\n\nJim had not suffered the indignity of misfortune. ", "He hadn't caught a flu or stepped off the wrong curb, hadn't had the pilot go out or the years wear him thin. ", "He had endured no insult that God must amend. ", "No accident. ", "No illness. ", "No unfortunate birth. ", "He had been given his life and he had thrown his life away.", "\n\nIn Sister Jeanne's simple logic, the logic of her belief, fairness made no claim for him. ", "His death was a whim of his own. ", "His own choice. ", "Who, in all fairness, could demand its restitution? ", "The promise of the Redemption, the promise of everlasting life, of order restored in heaven, could hold no water, she believed, if it could not also be revoked by such willfulness, such arrogance. ", "To gain heaven was no wonder if heaven could not also be lost.", "\n\nThrough the long night—Annie's hand in hers, her beads untold—Sister Jeanne studied his still and boyish face, cold stone. ", "She could find no certainty in her heart, or in her imagination, that it would ever again know life.", "\n\nNow his child, his living flesh and blood, was stretched across the couch in the convent parlor, her arms flung wide, her little hands open, palms up, her fingers flickering with her dreams. ", "She was growing quickly. ", "Sister Jeanne had to struggle to catch the infant still in the fair brows and the closed eyes, gently lashed, the little mouth, so solemn in sleep. ", "She felt—it was a flood, a filling up—how delightful it was to love this child, to find her here, day after day after day, a tonic for every sorrow. ", "A restorative. ", "A joy.", "\n\nShe thought of Jim and what he had thrown away.", "\n\nThe quiet convent parlor, in the hush of the rain, was tinged a kind of sepia—by the hour, by the weather, by the brown velvet of the couch and the room's dark wainscoting. ", "Mrs. Odette was murmuring to herself in the kitchen. ", "The smell of cinnamon and apples was mixing with the convent's own scent of incense and old wood. ", "There was some rumble of traffic outside, muffled by the weather.", "\n\nAnd then a sudden sound—startling, like a bird hitting the window—and Sister Jeanne looked up to see the man himself, in his brown suit, watching her from the convent's dim hallway. ", "She knew that suit. ", "She had run a horsehair clothes brush down its length, flicked a bit of lint from its shoulder before she carried it to Sheen's funeral parlor. ", "She knew the man. ", "She knew that stubborn, solemn, lifeless face. ", "It was lifeless still.", "\n\nSister Jeanne by then had sat vigil with any number of bodies, newly dead. ", "She recognized the feral odor that filled the room.", "\n\nWhat quickly followed, before Sister Jeanne could even raise her hand to her heart, before she could decide whether to shield the child or offer her to him—a balm, perhaps—was Sister Lucy's voice, just outside the convent door, unhappy with something, and another nun's, Sister Eugenia's, low and patient replies. ", "There was a thump again, perhaps Sister's toe against the heavy door. ", "It opened, letting a blue-gray, late-day light into the elegant foyer along with the sound of the rain. ", "The two nuns stepped inside, bustling, bustling, shaking their umbrellas and their cloaks. ", "They were arguing. ", "Sister Jeanne, weak-legged, stood and went to them, indicating with one hand the sleeping child, the other placed over her lips. ", "She saw that her fingers were trembling.", "\n\nThe gesture brought a brief pause to whatever the two nuns were fighting about, and in it, Sister Eugenia snatched the black satchel from Sister Lucy's hand and, shaking her head, went down the hallway, muttering Dr. Hannigan's name. ", "Sister Lucy then drew her freed arm into her wet cloak and looked at Sister Jeanne with a raised eyebrow, an expression—quite familiar to all of them in the convent—that said, I am smarter than any of you. ", "I am from better stock. ", "That said, You women constitute my purgatory. ", "That said, I will endure it, but not for your sake.", "\n\nIt was well known in the convent that Sister Lucy would have preferred a contemplative's life. ", "Would have preferred to converse with God alone.", "\n\nSister Lucy moved her impatient eyes to the child on the couch. \"", "Her mother's gone home?\" ", "she asked severely.", "\n\n\"Not home,\" Sister Jeanne replied. \"", "Just out to the stores. ", "Out to catch her breath.\"", "\n\nSister Lucy gave no indication that she knew she was being quoted. ", "Her eyes, as was their wont, darted back and forth with her thoughts. \"", "She's here too much,\" she said abruptly.", "\n\n\"Annie?\" ", "Sister Jeanne said.", "\n\nSister Lucy shook her jowls. \"", "No, of course not. ", "I mean the child.\" ", "Her eyes moved again. \"", "A convent child,\" she said, \"is not the same as a convent cat. ", "She isn't a pet.\" ", "Looking down, she trained her eyes on Sister Jeanne. \"", "She needs a proper home.\"", "\n\nSister Jeanne was still trembling with what she had seen. ", "Had imagined. ", "Had called forth. ", "At the back of her tongue, something bitter lingered; not fear exactly—hopelessness, defeat.", "\n\nShe knew herself to be a pagan at heart—superstitious, fanciful. ", "It was her most confessed sin. ", "Yet what terrified her now was not imagination but faith. ", "The logic of faith that told her she had seen a soul denied rest.", "\n\nShe touched Sister Lucy's cloak, guilty and afraid, as if the nun, so serious and sensible, so full of disdain, could right her.", "\n\n\"Her mother needs a proper home as well,\" Sister Lucy was saying. \"", "A proper husband.\"", "\n\nSister Jeanne said, \"I'll pray for it.\"", "\n\nSister Lucy gave a snort, and a kind of pity—although it was a cold, distant kind of pity, like a bit of cool shade offered by an outcropping of granite—swept across her yellow eyes. ", "A kind of pain.", "\n\nHer hands remained clasped under her cloak. ", "Sister Jeanne would later learn that Sister Lucy's wrist had been broken that afternoon by a man with the DTs, that the argument she had been having with Sister Eugenia as they came in was about going straight to the hospital to get it set. ", "Under her cloak, it was already swollen.", "\n\nWhich explained why Sister Lucy did not raise her red finger in the air as she was wont to do whenever she said \"Make note.\" ", "Sister Jeanne looked up at the nun to show she was making note anyway. \"", "Next time you see Mr. Costello and our Annie in the kitchen,\" Sister Lucy said, \"make note of what their faces give away.\"", "\nAlone\n\nMr. Costello was a quiet, balding man with a ready grin. ", "Polite and hush-voiced when he spoke to the Sisters, but loud and full of good humor when he called to people on the street. ", "He was always offering the nuns extra pints of cream or discounts that he seemed to make up on the spot. ", "Always admiring the \"miraculous\" cleanliness of the empty milk bottles they returned to him. ", "At the invitation of the Sisters, he attended mass in the convent chapel every first Friday, sitting in the last row with his cap in his hands and his head bowed low.", "\n\nWhen he was thirty-six, Mr. Costello had married a pretty, blue-eyed girl. ", "Rheumatic fever as a child had left her with a weak heart. ", "The case of Saint Vitus' Dance that followed left her isolated and strange. ", "Not a year into their marriage, Mrs. Costello was bitten by a stray dog that was foraging in the tangled backyard of one of the tenements. ", "Infection set in. ", "She lost her leg. ", "There followed a nervous collapse, a touched brain, an invalid's cosseted routine. ", "The Sisters called it a sad case.", "\n\nBecause they had been so often inside his home, the nuns knew there was no pretense in Mr. Costello. ", "They knew he kept his place in manly order—few knickknacks, just a pair of Mrs. Costello's porcelain-faced dolls on the dresser in the bedroom, a statue of St. Joseph on the mantel—and that he did as much dusting as a man could be expected to do: the top of a bureau, but not the legs; the base of a lamp, but not the shade. ", "They knew the apartment's one closet was arranged with military precision and the kitchen cupboards were neatly spare—one bottle of bootlegged whiskey, used only for toothaches or colds (the visiting Sisters checked it daily). ", "He kept house, all the Sisters agreed, like a fastidious bachelor. ", "No hint of anything unseemly to indicate otherwise. ", "Or to tell them he was something less than the good, unfortunate man he appeared to be.", "\n\nThe intimacies of bathing and feminine hygiene Mr. Costello left to the nuns, but he cooked his wife a dinner every night and there was never a dish left in the sink or a crumb left on the tablecloth when the Sisters arrived every morning to wake her and give her breakfast. ", "Caring for Mrs. Costello, who was childish, sometimes churlish, thin as a rail, light as a feather, was an easy enough bit of duty, easily dispensed. ", "Because Mr. Costello was up and gone well before dawn, the Sisters could arrive as early as the day required, spend an hour, and then leave the poor woman, refreshed and well-fed, in her chair by the front window, a small sandwich and a glass of milk and a chamber pot all within easy reach. ", "A Sister might stop in at lunchtime or, if Mr. Costello was going to be delayed—if he'd told the nuns that morning, sometimes via only a note left among their milk bottles, that he was driving up to the dairy that afternoon or attending a union meeting in the city—they might bring an early dinner as well, and then get her ready for bed, knowing that the clean linens and the soothed wife that would greet Mr. Costello at the end of his long working day was the Sisters' own way of telling him that he had their admiration.", "\n\nAnnie first spoke to him in the convent kitchen early on a deeply gray morning with a rain so cold and steady it had kept him behind in his deliveries. ", "He had paused in too many doorways, looking for a break in the low clouds. ", "He had lingered in conversation with a complaining old woman he usually hoped to avoid. ", "Against his preferred routine, he had smoked a morning cigarette in his cart, watching the steam rise from the flanks of the patient horse, reluctant to turn up his collar once more, to head out once more with his milk crate into the storm.", "\n\nAnnie, for her part, had come to the convent earlier than usual, just as the Sisters were going in to morning prayer. ", "The rain had woken her before dawn—no walk with Mrs. Tierney today, and the lack of it made her wonder if she had the wherewithal to get herself out of bed. ", "Sally was three years old, fast asleep beside her. ", "Annie listened to the rain against the windows until the room had gathered enough light to see by, and then she got up carefully—the child was easily woken—and made her way into the kitchen. ", "She meant to put the kettle on, to warm both herself and the room, but when she pressed her nose to the window to see if there would be any relief in the weather, the old smoky odor of the catastrophe arose again. ", "She smelled it on the wet glass and the damp sill, on the twice-repainted kitchen walls, as if the odor of fire and sorrow was contained in the soaked brick of the building itself.", "\n\nShe glanced down into the backyard. ", "Still too dark to see anything but her own reflection. ", "She imagined opening the window to lean out into the rain. ", "Imagined that if she did so, she would feel the sure pressure of Jim's hand on her waist, easing her away, whispering into her ear in the wordless way of ghosts. ", "And what would he say? ", "Would it be an apology? ", "A pledge? ", "A stumbling excuse, or the smiling, wheedling endearments he had spoken to her so often in the past, from this kitchen table, from their warm bed: \"Oh, let me stay where I am a while longer.\"", "\n\nOn the day she buried him, they rode out to the cemetery in Mr. Sheen's hearse. ", "Annie and the undertaker and Sister St. Saviour, wrapped in her black cloak. ", "The nun was as monolithic, as sunken-eyed, as a defeated general.", "\n\nDefeat was all about them as they passed through the dark streets. ", "Early morning it was, rain and snow. ", "Jim, the empty shell of him, riding behind them in the long car.", "\n\nWhat had God been to her until that bitter morning? ", "Father, guardian, comforter, king. ", "All Annie seemed capable of remembering as they drove was a lifetime of negotiations, of pleas—so many of them, until that morning, about Jim. ", "That he would smile at her, that he would come to call. ", "Please God: that he would cross to New York in safety. ", "Please God: that he'd be there to meet her when she followed him.", "\n\nThat he would get up out of bed.", "\n\nIt seemed the single prayer of her married life: that he would get out of bed, go to work, come home—come home with something brighter on his face than that hooded scowl, please God. ", "Please God, let him put an end to those long breaths through distended nostrils, to the sinking into himself, fists closing, for conversations she couldn't hear. ", "Let him recount for her something that had happened throughout his day that was not an insult, an affront. ", "Let him lose his contempt. ", "Let him keep his job. ", "Let him get up out of bed and be on time for a change.", "\n\nThat cold morning, the cemetery trees were like black lines etched in window frost, the ground brittle with icy spears of grass. ", "The casket was pulled from the hearse. ", "When a plot was available, they would put him in it. ", "She didn't ask where his body would stay until then. ", "With Sister's help, she had money enough only for this. ", "She was going to save the deed to Calvary for herself alone.", "\n\nShe touched the coffin, coated now with the fat drops of melted snow. ", "Sister St. Saviour waved a vial of holy water and said a prayer. ", "The three blessed themselves—Annie and Mr. Sheen and the nun—and then climbed back into the car with their clothes damp.", "\n\nShe didn't hold it against the Church: the miserable morning, the cold, unconsecrated ground, the refused funeral mass, not even the money she'd lost on the double grave at Calvary. ", "She well understood that there would be no rules at all if there were no punishment for the failure to follow them. ", "Like any good mother, the Church had to cuff its children when they misbehaved. ", "Make the punishment fit the crime.", "\n\nHe'd murdered himself and murdered something in her as well.", "\n\nWho could argue for leniency? ", "Who could expect absolution?", "\n\nSister St. Saviour did, of course. ", "But the woman, childless, stubborn, coming to the close of her life, had a mad heart. ", "Mad for mercy, perhaps, mad for her own authority in all things—a trait Annie had come to love and admire—but mad nonetheless. ", "Riding home from the cemetery, Sister St. Saviour had said, \"It would be a different Church if I were running it.\"", "\n\nAnd so lifted the burden of that terrible morning with some laughter.", "\n\nBut Annie never blamed the Church.", "\n\nIt was instead the recollection of her own unanswered prayers, simple as they had been, that made her grow cautious in her faith, wary of her own belief.", "\n\nLet him get up, she had prayed—how often?—boiling an egg and making his tea and hurrying back into the silent bedroom to call him again. ", "Hating her own desperation. ", "Her own helplessness. ", "Hating the way his gray moods and scarlet furies put himself between her and the simple happiness life was offering, a kind of paradise after the poor lives they'd left behind: this busy city, his good job, this tidy place of their own, a child coming in summer.", "\n\nLet him get up and get going, she had prayed—avoiding his hand as he reached out from under the blankets he'd pulled over his head. ", "Or, sometimes, giving in—she had done this, too—giving in to the luxury of what he wanted to believe: that their time belonged to themselves alone, that they could do as they pleased with it.", "\n\nNow, at the kitchen window, looking into the black yard, tangled and wet, the tangle seeming to writhe in the sheen of falling rain, she stamped her foot and felt the old impatience that was as well her most vivid memory of her married life. _", "Jimmy, get up._", "\n\nOnly her own pale face looked back at her in the gray glass.", "\n\nEven his ghost was impossible to stir.", "\n\nIt was a cold hope at best to imagine otherwise.", "\n\nThe cold hope, nevertheless, that kept her in this apartment where he had died, where he had lived, when a smaller, cheaper place would do.", "\n\nShe woke Sally, and they both dressed and pulled on their rain boots. ", "Annie carried the girl the five blocks to the convent, the big umbrella doing little good in the blowing rain, and arrived breathless and laughing, just as the nuns—their plain faces made plainer still by the lingering traces of sleep—filed silently into the chapel. ", "In the bright convent kitchen, she shook the rain from her hair. ", "Mrs. Odette had yet to arrive. ", "Annie was rubbing a tea towel over Sally's wet head, the two of them singing softly together, \"It's raining, it's pouring . . .\" ", "while the sound of the morning psalm floated from the chapel. ", "She saw a black and bent figure through the glass of the back door, heard the rattle of the milk bottles. ", "Impulsively, she pulled open the door. ", "Mr. Costello looked up, startled. ", "Rain dripped from the peak of his glistening cap and from his nose. \"", "Poor man,\" she said. \"", "Why don't you come in?\"", "\n\nHe stepped inside with no other thought than that he wanted to. ", "He stood, the two fresh bottles of milk in his hands, the two gleaming empties under his arm, his coat dripping on the mat at the threshold. ", "The kitchen itself was not unfamiliar to him, but never before had he seen it like this, so well-ordered and warmly lit, with a pretty child seated on the high step stool the nuns kept at the counter, a child big-eyed and curious, and the woman who helped out in the laundry, a tea towel in her hand, smiling to welcome him. ", "No beauty, perhaps, but with lovely dark hair that was wet and plastered in black ribbons here and there on her pale forehead and white throat. ", "Despite the noise of the rain outside, he could hear the sweet voices of the nuns in the chapel. ", "They were singing \" _O Salutaris Hostia_ ,\" a hymn he had known since his boyhood.", "\n\nAnnie stepped forward to take the two bottles of milk from his hands. ", "He saw that one strand of hair ran in a jagged line across her flushed cheek, nearly reaching her mouth, which was crooked and prettily bowed.", "\n\nIt was only the long habit of caring for a sick wife that made him, still dripping, reach out to brush the wet strand away.", "\n\nHe heard the closing notes of the hymn, remembered the Latin from school, the words that touched his exile's heart. _", "O grant us endless length of days, in our true native land with thee._", "\n\nHe was inspired to ask her, \"Where are you from?\"", "\n\nThat same afternoon, Mr. Costello met her on the corner when she ran out to catch her breath. ", "And then she saw him again on a brighter day as she left the butcher shop. ", "He was, on occasion, paused in the doorways she passed. ", "He greeted her, kept pace casually. ", "He was as tall as she was, which was not tall for a man, and yet their shoulders never met. ", "He did not offer to carry her bag. ", "They walked to the park one bright day, and then as far as the promenade, where they sat, a good distance apart, on the bench. ", "Even so, she could smell the stable on his clothes.", "\n\nTheir talk skimmed over everything. ", "It was what made their hour together so delightful to her. ", "He had a story to tell from the morning, or from only a few minutes before they met. ", "He had a story to tell that was told to him just last Sunday after mass. ", "She offered in exchange something Liz Tierney had said—a tale from the hotel, from her children. ", "Since the first afternoon he had met her on the corner—out of the convent for an hour, thanks to Sister Jeanne, out to catch her breath—they seemed to agree that nothing was worth saying, here in the middle of her busy working day and at the weary end of his own, if it did not make them both laugh.", "\n\nNo mournful tales, then, of her widowhood, of his frail wife. ", "No indignant recounting of Sister Illuminata's demands during the endless hours in the laundry. ", "No complaints from him about the cold weather or the milk trains or the vague and endless demands of customers and bosses. ", "They sat apart as strangers might on a bench in the park, and their talk skimmed over all that preceded the time they were together and all that awaited them the rest of the day.", "\n\nA year of this, and then she pressed the key to the downstairs door into his hand. \"", "Come up\" was all she said, and walked ahead of him in the street. ", "At the corner, she glanced over her shoulder to see that he had already crossed to the other side. ", "It pleased her that he knew enough to place some time between them.", "\n\nShe left the door ajar: she wouldn't have him knocking for all the neighbors to hear. ", "She left the door ajar and sat in the living room, in the single chair, so she could hear his step or see his shadow as he approached.", "\n\nShe wondered how long he would keep her waiting. ", "How much discretion she would have to endure.", "\n\nShe folded her hands, one over the other on her lap. ", "They were not smooth. ", "He would not, she was certain, expect them to be.", "\n\nShe thought of his own pale hands, big farmer's hands that belonged to a stouter man. ", "His thick shoes, a piece of straw sometimes caught in a cuff or entangled in the frayed laces.", "\n\nThe door was ajar. ", "The glass transom above it was closed. ", "It was a cold bright afternoon in midwinter. ", "The room was poor. ", "The slipcover she'd made to hide the scorched couch was ill-fitting, the fabric dull, as if faded. ", "The picture she'd hung above it was too small for the wide wall. ", "It was a heavily framed oil of the Sacred Heart, the image darkened by time. ", "It had arrived in the donation basket—the frame was chipped and there was a tear in the canvas. \"", "Coals to Newcastle,\" Sister Illuminata had said when she saw it, but little Sally was enamored, and Annie herself had felt some piety when she hung it up—stood on the couch in her bare feet, drove the nail, Sally watching her from the floor. ", "It seemed a pretension now. ", "In her time at the convent, her eyes had grown accustomed to authentic elegance—the beautiful house itself, built for a wealthy man: the gleaming woods, the simple chandeliers, the plaster ceiling roses and graceful corbels. ", "There was no denying that this bare room was a poor woman's room, an immigrant's small space. ", "No denying that its spare cleanliness betrayed an immigrant's reserve. ", "Twice since Jim died, she'd hung it with new paper—and now as she waited, she could see in the far corner that the latest attempt had already begun to curl. ", "Twice she had repainted the kitchen walls, the bedroom walls.", "\n\nHe would find the place clean and well-ordered when he appeared.", "\n\nShe had a moment's doubt that he would indeed appear, a moment's fear that he had misunderstood her meaning, or disapproved of it, when she pressed the key into his hand. ", "She dismissed both notions.", "\n\nThe Sisters said his own place was also neat as a pin. ", "It was, she suspected, another kind of pretension, this immigrant reserve. ", "A clean and well-ordered veneer over the trouble of a bedridden wife, a dead husband, over loneliness and worry.", "\n\nThe door was ajar. ", "Through it, she heard what she knew was the sound of his footstep—although it might be the footstep of anyone—and then his shadow, hesitating. ", "She stood. ", "He was there. ", "She opened the door just enough to admit him. ", "Smell of the stable on his clothes, but also, now, the smell of alcohol and of pine soap, as if he had stopped before he came up. ", "Stopped to take a drink. ", "To wash his hands.", "\n\nHe took off his cap and smoothed back his hair, what there was of it. ", "The bareness of his poor scalp moved her with pity, a sympathetic affection. ", "It was an infant's delicate skull; it was a reminder that he was not young.", "\n\nIn this light his eyes were merely brown, although in the sun she sometimes saw green and black and gold.", "\n\nHe put his hand to her chin and she touched his cheek, knowing her fingertips were rough. ", "A sound arose from the cluttered backyard and rattled the kitchen window. ", "It was the familiar tapping of city grit, or wind-lifted leaves, or maybe a pigeon's wing against the glass. ", "A sound that might once have filled her with fanciful notions: Jim's breath in her ear, his hand on her hip, something restored to her.", "\n\nAs they both turned toward the noise, she saw his eyes catch the painting on her wall, the familiar image of Christ, sorrowful, compassionate, barely visible in the darkening oils but for the pale hand that gestured toward a heart threaded with thorns.", "\n\nAnd then they both turned their eyes away from it.", "\n\n\"Are we alone?\" ", "he whispered.", "\n\nShe said, \"We are.\"", "\nRose\n\nWe had on our father's side a great-great-aunt, Aunt Rose. ", "A tiny woman, very old. ", "We recall a velvet hat and a pale broadcloth suit, rose-colored perhaps, and maybe the smell of rosewater about her as she made her way into the house—one gloved hand steadying herself on the long server that had been our grandmother's, one skimming the backs of the chairs that lined the dining table, skimming our cheeks as well as she encountered us, one by one. ", "Our father behind her, carrying her bags, saying, \"Step aside,\" telling us, \"Say 'Good afternoon,'\" \"Say 'Pardon me.'\" ", "Our father—the doorman's son—banging her two suitcases against the chair legs and setting the porcelain in the china cabinet ringing.", "\n\nThis was in the drafty house in Hempstead where we grew up. ", "It was an old house, red-shingled and white-trimmed, plagued with an endless series of tumble-down catastrophes that made our father in midlife a caricature of the hapless, city-bred, suburban homeowner. ", "We recall him prowling through the rooms with a stepladder on his shoulder, with a hammer or a socket wrench in his hands, doing no good. ", "Our mother, when she was well, always smiling indulgently, following him with her eyes.", "\n\nThe old Hempstead house. ", "We recall the battered glass knob of the side door, our shoulders to its peeling paint. ", "A nest of boots and shoes inside, no matter the season, a tattered rag rug, the dark basement-breath of heating oil and cinderblock and cold dirt. ", "Then three steps up to the narrow kitchen—dark green countertops, black linoleum floor flecked with red, red cabinets, appliances of enamel and steel, scent of clove and cinnamon and sunlight and dust. ", "The narrow passage to the dining room. ", "Lace tablecloth, lace doilies, lace curtains at the window, and beyond it, a continuation of lace, the apple tree in full, wind-scattered bloom, or maybe a sudden shower of snow, as old Aunt Rose steadied herself, coming into the house, one gloved hand on the long server that had been our grandmother's, one running along our cheeks.", "\n\nJust where she had come from and why she had appeared remained uncertain. \"", "Upstate,\" we were told. \"", "Because she is old,\" we were told. ", "She was given the guest room, and directed by our father, we followed her halting journey up the stairs with our hands poised at her elbows or at her hips. ", "She trembled, we recall, either because of her great age or because of her delight at our elaborate courtesies.", "\n\nThe guest room on the third floor of the old Hempstead house was narrow beneath the eaves, painted yellow, white curtains at the window.", "\n\nDownstairs again, our father told the story of Great-aunt Rose and Red Whelan. ", "Up in Poughkeepsie this was, he said. ", "Just after the Civil War. ", "A knock at the door when the family was at dinner. ", "Rose only a small child. ", "A man invited in: red hair, red skin, scarred red flesh from neck to ear as if a plow had scraped his face. ", "One leg and one arm, so that he, too, Red Whelan, made a halting climb to the upstairs room—tap of crutch on each stair tread, on the attic's bare wood. ", "Patrick, our great-grandfather, a young schoolteacher by then, standing silently in the room's narrow doorway as Red Whelan was shown the bed, the washstand, a small desk, and a wide wing chair, all the family had done to prepare the place for him. ", "The room where he would live out his days.", "\n\nAnd Great-aunt Rose, still a child, holding his dinner in a covered dish.", "\n\nWhen we were teenagers, brooding in our bedrooms, brooding or hungover, or just sleeping through an afternoon, as our mother used to do, our father would complain, his voice annoyed, bordering on angry, but amused also, because he, too, had been a reader, a brooder, and the phrase had been his own father's refrain—\"Hibernating up there like Red Whelan.\"", "\n\nAny redheaded, fat-faced, freckled Irishman was a regular Red Whelan.", "\n\nAny houseguest who stayed too long was threatening to become a Red Whelan.", "\n\nAny mention of old Aunt Rose's long and lonely life included the forty-odd years she had devoted herself to Red Whelan, her brother's substitute in the Civil War. ", "A widowed spinster, our father called her. ", "A married nun.", "\n\nWe carried the tea things upstairs. ", "We carried her sparse dinner, only small bowls of mush: soups and applesauce and creamed farina. ", "In the third-floor room, she blinked at us from her bed or from her chair, her face always dusted with powder, although it seemed to us then that she was dusted with dust.", "\n\nAnd the Little Nursing Sisters of the Sick Poor standing by. \"", "Aren't you good?\" ", "they told us when we brought in the old lady's tray or took it away. ", "Sister Jeanne among them. ", "Our favorite.", "\n\nWe knew them well, the Little Nursing Sisters. ", "The order of nuns our mother had thought to join until—our father liked to say—she thought better of it.", "\n\nWe knew them from our own fevered mornings: waking to find their pale hands to our foreheads and to our cheeks, or seeing through our crusted eyes their serious faces within the white bonnets as they put a thermometer between our lips, commanded us not to bite it. ", "We watched them float around our sickbeds, tugging and pulling with their short, clean hands until our night-tangled blankets and sheets were transformed into something clean again, and cool.", "\n\nWe knew them from all the long afternoons when we came home from school, hand to the glass knob of the battered side door, and found a nursing nun standing like a black-and-white beacon in the kitchen—her finger to her lips because our mother had once more taken to her shaded room to sleep off what they called her melancholy.", "\n\nThey arrived by taxi in those days, before their habits were amended to allow them enough peripheral vision to drive themselves. ", "Our father scurried out to the curb to pay the fare.", "\n\nFor years we believed we were not unusual in this. ", "For years we believed the Little Nursing Sisters of the Sick Poor, Congregation of Mary Before the Cross, appeared in every household whenever crisis or illness disrupted the routine, whenever a substitute was needed for She Who Could Not Be Replaced.", "\n\nSister Jeanne was our favorite.", "\n\nShe was an old woman then. ", "Shorter than we were. ", "Child-sized inside her habit. ", "When she made us tea, she warmed the milk, and she carried in her black satchel a sleeve of biscuits we have never found since. ", "Coated with chocolate, we recall, with a thin, summery taste of strawberry jam.", "\n\nWhen she spoke to us—and not all the Little Sisters spoke to us so easily—her voice was always wry—\"It's all silliness, isn't it?\"—so that we never knew if we would be hushed into sacred silence by what she said or if her voice would suddenly curl up like a grin and we would see that inside her white bonnet and her dark veil she was shaking with laughter.", "\n\nShe said, \"I knew your mother since before she was born. ", "Same as I know all of youse.\"", "\n\nShe said, \"youse,\" which delighted us. ", "She said \"pernt\" for point, \"erl\" for oil. ", "She was years out of Brooklyn by then, at the Old Age Home the Sisters ran out on Long Island, as an aide, not a patient. ", "Although she must have been nearly as old as many of the women she cared for.", "\n\nShe asked us, \"Who's the dumbest boy in your class?\"", "\n\nReaching under her bonnet, she tapped her freckled forehead. ", "She touched her white bib between the chain of her cross, as if her heart was centered there. ", "She said, \"Because God put the knowledge in you before you were born, see? ", "So you'd know He intends to be fair.\"", "\n\nShe tagged her sentences with \"see?\" ", "like a Hollywood gangster, and this delighted us, too.", "\n\nSister Jeanne told us that she had meant to join another order altogether, another order of nuns also called Little Sisters, but went to the wrong address. ", "Where Sister St. Saviour simply shrugged and said, \"God's will.\"", "\n\nSister Jeanne said, \"I knew your mother before she was born because Sister St. Saviour introduced us.\"", "\n\nShe said, \"No one called for her, but still she appeared. ", "That was the miracle, see? ", "God saw the need. ", "There was an accident with the gas. ", "God saw your mother and your grandmother's need, and so Sister St. Saviour appeared.\"", "\n\nWe were sitting at the dining room table in the long, hushed hours of those still afternoons when our mother slept off her sadness, or when Great-aunt Rose was in the upper room. ", "It might have been any season: there were blossoms on the apple tree at the window behind her head. ", "There was a squall of fat snowflakes.", "\n\nShe told us, \"There was a lovely smell of roses when Sister St. Saviour died. ", "She opened her eyes for just a moment, she hadn't opened them in days, and then she closed them again and sighed. ", "It was a very deep sigh. ", "But no weariness in it, see? ", "No sadness. ", "I would say it was a satisfied sigh. ", "And after that, it was like a thousand roses had been brought, special delivery, into the room. ", "It was just a glimpse of where her soul had gone. ", "A whiff of it. ", "As if a door had opened for a moment, just to let her in, and all of us still stuck here on earth got a glimpse. ", "Because a glimpse is all the living can bear. ", "All we can bear of heaven's beauty.\"", "\n\nShe said, her eyes to the ceiling, \"It's not for me, you know. ", "That beauty. ", "But never mind. ", "You'll see it, for truth. ", "Your old aunty, too.\"", "\n\nHow long did Great-aunt Rose stay with us? ", "A few weeks, a month, maybe two? ", "On a warm afternoon, we came in from school to find the guest room empty. ", "Our mother, up and about on that day, had opened the windows to let in the air. ", "The white curtains stirred, the mattress was bare.", "\n\nOur father said later that because our mother was delicate, given to melancholy, it seemed best that old Rose go off to a nursing home for her final days. ", "For expert care, he said. ", "The nursing home was run by yet another order of nuns, not our own Little Nursing Sisters, whose numbers were diminishing even then. ", "Whose Bishop had cast an acquisitive eye over their elegant convent, even then.", "\n\nGreat-aunt Rose, we were told, was gone to spend her last days in a nursing home run by the very order Sister Jeanne hadn't joined, an order that specialized in old people who had come to the end of their time. ", "In a town called Valhalla.", "\n\n\"Of all things,\" our father said.", "\n\n\"If that's not a sure sign she's going to heaven,\" he said, well satisfied that his obligation to the old lady had been met, \"I don't know what is.\"", "\nThe Convent Child\n\nA fox stole with a broken clasp found among the donated clothes, a lady's velvet chapeau, some elbow-length kid gloves, torn at the seams, and Sally transformed herself into Mrs. McShane, the elegant and imperious woman (Brooklyn hoi polloi, Annie said) who organized the Ladies Auxiliary's annual tea and Christmas Bazaar to raise funds for the convent. ", "Sally brought the stole to her chin, extended a wavering arm to Sister Illuminata, and said in Mrs. McShane's studied, drawling way, \"Our good Little Sisters.\" ", "Said to her mother, the gloved fingers spread across her cheek, \"But, Annie, my dear, where are the petits fours?\"", "\n\nShe shimmied into a discarded housedress, slipped one of the nuns' bibbed aprons over her head, and pantomimed Mrs. Odette's kitchen dance—lifting imaginary pot lids, peeling imaginary apples held right before her squinting eyes, whispering \" _Herregud_ \" under her breath until her mother and Sister Illuminata, laughing, were begging her to \"Shush.\"", "\n\nA babushka and a moth-eaten coat with a lambskin collar, an expression of peering curiosity, dawning disapproval, and there was Mrs. Gertler just as she looked every evening, watching the street from her parlor-floor window.", "\n\nOnce, when Annie was out at the shops, the organ grinder stopped on the street outside the convent, turning his squawking box and singing his off-key Italian. ", "It was a hot day and the basement windows were open behind the grills. \"", "For the love of God,\" Sister Illuminata muttered, \"couldn't he play an Irish tune?\" ", "Sally—quick as a sprite—moved a coal box beneath the window, hopped onto it, and, grabbing the iron bars, shouted, in Sister Illuminata's own brogue, \"Play us an Irish tune, for the love of God.\"", "\n\nThe poor man, searching the air for the source of the voice, cried out, \"Yes, Sister,\" and attempted to sing some mangled, halfhearted version of \"The Wearing of the Green.\"", "\n\n\"Good man,\" Sally cried when he had come to a halting finish.", "\n\nThe child, Sister Illuminata said, was a born mimic.", "\n\nThe days in the laundry grew longer for the two women when Sally started school, but when she returned, she brought her mother and the nun tales from what they called the wider world. ", "She could capture her classmates' broken English, or their solid Brooklynese, with perfection. ", "She had the pastor's nasally Latin down to a T. She was a good and quiet child in the classroom, polite and shy on the street, but in the basement laundry of the convent, every impulse toward silliness, every outlandish pantomime or adolescent misfiring of elbows and feet, not to mention wickedness and wildness, was set free, and utterly indulged by her mother and the nun, provided—they were always reminding her—that she kept her voice low.", "\n\nProvided, it was understood, that proper decorum was re-established whenever she went \"upstairs,\" which meant into the whole of the universe above the convent laundry.", "\n\nPerhaps because of this indulgence, the girl, as she grew, chose to linger with Sister Illuminata whenever her mother went out in the afternoons—to do her shopping, to catch her breath—rather than follow her or join the other girls playing in the street. ", "When Sister Jeanne came down the stairs, Sally kissed the little nun but, more and more, begged off their old routines. ", "Sister Illuminata hid her pleasure in this. ", "She turned to her ironing, sighed heavily to disguise a thin smile. ", "Sister Jeanne's sweet goodness was best spent on younger children, she thought. ", "On innocents. ", "An older child, an older child with some spunk like Sally, like her own Mary Pat Shea, might prefer a little devilment in her friends.", "\n\nA small table was borrowed from an upstairs hallway and carried to the cellar so that Sally could do her homework there, in Sister Illuminata's company (the iron thumping and hissing), rather than, more sensibly, at the well-lit table in the convent kitchen or the dining room in her own home. ", "For if a case of the giggles overcame her here, or if she recalled some incident from the schoolyard this morning that she longed to re-enact, or even if, bored with sums, she drifted to the donation baskets and tried on a few clothes, Sister Illuminata, fondly, would abide.", "\n\nIt was late afternoon and her mother had gone to the shops. ", "Sally was nearly thirteen. ", "She was helping Sister Illuminata fold the last of the day's clothes. ", "One of the freshly ironed tunics belonged to Sister Jeanne, and Sally, laughing, held it up against her. ", "The nun looked at the girl over her shoulder. ", "Sally said, \"Let's fool my mother.\"", "\n\nIt was not the first time she had dressed in the habit of the Little Sisters. ", "It was a custom at her school to hold \"vocation days,\" when the students were asked to dress up as priests and nuns and to parade about the schoolyard as miniature ecclesiastics. ", "Because of her status as a convent child, and because she was a good and quiet girl, Sally was chosen every year to represent the various orders of nursing Sisters in the modified habit that Sister Illuminata herself had made for her—and then altered each year as she grew. ", "But on this afternoon, Sally eyed Sister Jeanne's full habit, the clean, consecrated cloth. \"", "Come on, Sister,\" she said. \"", "Just for fun.\"", "\n\nAgainst her better judgment, Sister Illuminata helped the girl into the tunic. ", "Since she had no cincture handy, she tied a linen bandage around the girl's thin waist and then brushed and smoothed the shoulders and the wide sleeves, shaking her head all the while at their transgression, but loving, too, the nearness of the girl, the coiled energy of her narrow body, the sweet buds of her breasts, the faint pattern of freckles on her nose that, this close, appeared to ride beneath the surface of her skin, as if under a milky veil.", "\n\nSitting on her ironing chair, Sister pressed the coif over Sally's bent head, tugging the thing into place over her ears, tucking her hair away with a busy mother's gentle brusqueness. ", "Sally closed her eyes and placed her hands on Sister's swollen knees. ", "Her breath smelled of milk and crackers. ", "She was laughing when they began, her crooked teeth catching at the cloth of the tunic as it went over her head, but now she grew solemn, her eyes closed, as Sister smoothed and tucked, moving her scarred fingertip gently along the girl's forehead and her cheeks. ", "She tugged the cloth into place and leaned back to look at Sally in the basement sunlight.", "\n\nSister shook her head, as if she disapproved of the charade and had no part in it, but what she was shaking off, in truth, was the bare beauty of the girl's plain face inside the white linen, a face pure and ageless and as innocent as if it had just been formed. ", "She pushed Sally away a bit, taking the weight of the child off her sore knees, and fitted the bonnet over the coif. ", "Then she lifted Sister Jeanne's black veil, newly ironed, and gently placed it over Sally's head. ", "Took a pin from her own veil to hold it in place.", "\n\nWhen Annie came down the stairs just after five o'clock, winded and apologizing that she had taken longer than usual because she had just run home to drop off a few things, Sister Illuminata, in her chair beside the ironing board, said casually, \"Oh, Sally's already gone.\"", "\n\n\"When?\" ", "Annie asked. \"", "I didn't see her on the street. ", "When did she leave? ", "I never passed her on the street.\"", "\n\nThe girl stepped out from the shadow of the furnace, into some streaming light from the high basement window. ", "In perfect imitation of Sister Jeanne, she had her hands tucked into her sleeves, her eyes cast down. ", "Stepping forward, she ducked her head in Sister Jeanne's own way, a way that implied tremendous shyness as well as some futile, last-ditch effort to suppress—like a lid on a boiling pot, Annie sometimes said—the rushing impulse to break into laughter.", "\n\nThe perfume of sunlight arose from Sister Jeanne's clothes. ", "The late-spring afternoon threw a shaft of gold into the high window. ", "It landed at Sally's feet.", "\n\nWith her head bowed, she could not see her mother, but she could hear her pause. \"", "What in the world?\" ", "Annie whispered.", "\n\nSister Illuminata said, \"Allow me to introduce a new member of our community. ", "This is Sister St. Sally. ", "Sister St. Sally of the Smelly Socks.\"", "\n\nThe nun's laughter was low and deep, and Annie's, after a pause, was full of warm impatience. \"", "You are a pair,\" she said. ", "She was slipping out of her spring coat. \"", "The two of you. ", "Is that Jeanne's habit? ", "Don't you think it's a sacrilege, Sister?\"", "\n\nSally moved forward, just a step or two, into the full corridor of spring sunlight.", "\n\nThe golden sunshine through the high basement window was like the light in holy cards—Sally felt it fall on her the way the painted light in holy cards fell over the bowed heads of saints. ", "She held out her arms and marveled at their elegance within the wide sleeves, her wrists so slim and white against the black serge. ", "She was filled with what seemed Sister Jeanne's own confidence and peace. ", "Without a mirror to consult, with only her mother and Sister Illuminata's silly laughter to guide her, she understood, nevertheless, that she had been transformed. ", "That even her voice, muffled as it was by the linen over her ears, the voice the two had so often warned her to soften, was now something else altogether, something solemn and graceful and profound. ", "She knew she was meant to be a nun.", "\n\nThat night, when Sally whispered her intentions to her mother, speaking into the darkness, in the bed they still shared, Annie wondered if she might do well to point out that her daughter's ability to imitate to perfection snooty Mrs. McShane and harried Mrs. Odette, and even nosy Mrs. Gertler downstairs, was no proof at all that she was destined to become a city councilman's wife or a convent cook or a Jewish landlady with a dozen wigs.", "\n\nBut with the girl's bright eyes shining from the pillow beside hers, she resisted the impulse to tease.", "\n\nShe said instead, \"Are you thinking already about how you'll leave me?\"", "\n\nAnd never meant to sound so pained.", "\n\nWhen Sally was still small and lifted down from the carriage in order to accommodate another of Mrs. Tierney's serial infants, she gripped her mother's skirt as they made their way along the streets. ", "Under the rough cloth, the movements of her mother's hips and legs was always firm, without hesitation, and even as a small child, Sally felt the confidence of those quick steps as if her own feet drove them. ", "When her mother reached for her hand because the crowds on the street were growing dense or the sun was setting and the streetlights coming on, or because there was something, or someone, they had to hurry past, the broad, strong grip of her fingers was not reassuring—it was solid assurance itself.", "\n\nAll her life, Sally had known that assurance.", "\n\nShe had watched her mother's hands dispatch a pile of piecework in an evening's time. ", "Seen them transform a knot of jumbled linen into a tall straight stack ready for the cupboard, architectural in its beauty. ", "Her mother could set a springing mousetrap in a flash, dispose of the broken varmint—out the back window into the yard—and then light a match with the flick of her thumb to disperse the sweet and sickly dead-mouse smell.", "\n\nHer mother could deftly wring a chicken's neck, pluck and wash and baste and serve it. ", "She could mix a poultice, a bucket of wallpaper paste, a batter for bread, a batter for cake.", "\n\nHer mother could soothe a torrent of tears with the brush of her rough thumb. ", "She could send her daughter into an infant's deep sleep with the gentle drumming of her fingertips all along the girl's spine.", "\n\nIn the basement laundry, Sally watched her mother pluck potions from Sister Illuminata's tall shelves, handling with ease even those brown bottles that bore what Sister called the devil's mark: a nightmarish skull and crossbones.", "\n\nShe watched her mother sew—thumb and forefinger moving quickly, lightly, up and down, the other three slim fingers extended elegantly, flashing silver needle and the winking gold of her wedding band—her quick, sure hands, and stitches so fine, so even, you'd think the cloth (Sister Illuminata once said) had healed itself.", "\n\nSister Illuminata, glancing up from the ironing board or the scrub brush or the mangle, observed her mother at work. ", "The nun's admiration went mostly unspoken, and yet, in their quiet underworld, Sally saw it.", "\n\nShe saw as well how Sister Jeanne lifted her chin at the sound of her mother's laughter, as if to catch a warm sun. ", "How approvingly Sister Dymphna, Sister Eugenia, any of the nuns, scanned her mother's secondhand suit, beautifully altered and repaired, or Sally's own donation-basket Sunday clothes, whenever they met on the street after mass. ", "From behind their horse-blinder bonnets, the nuns' admiration was palpable and clear.", "\n\nAnd even fearless Mrs. Tierney sat back in her chair in pure amazement as her mother related a tale of how she had spoken up: when the butcher had his finger on the scale or the hot water at home was running tepid or the insurance man failed to properly mark his note. \"", "You spoke up,\" Mrs. Tierney would say, flabbergasted, admiring, proud, and her mother would reply, all strength and assurance, \"I certainly did.\"", "\n\nMother and daughter still shared the same bed, as they had done since Sally was born. ", "They woke together, and together went down the apartment stairs just after dawn. ", "The early-morning strolls with Mrs. Tierney ended when all the children were swept into school, but Annie's impulse toward routine was strong and still she stopped most mornings to see her friend—often in yet another, only slightly larger apartment; the six Tierney children growing so quickly that the new place was always immediately tighter still. ", "Chaos and mess, as always, in Liz Tierney's place. ", "And then the walk to school, the Tierney children swarming. ", "And Sally coming down the basement stairs just after three, swinging her books, a story to tell. ", "And then, when the day was done, mother and daughter returning home at dusk, under Mrs. Gertler's watchful eye, to the small dinner they would eat together at the dining room table. ", "Then the cleaning up and the hour on the couch, Annie with piecework and the radio, Sally with her books or the newspaper or, if the paper bore bad news or the day had been dark, a rosary said together in alternating voices.", "\n\nThe repeated prayers, handed off between mother and daughter, always spoken clearly and loudly, as if to reach someone in the next room.", "\n\nThey put out the lights, checked the stove. ", "In winter, Annie stood on a chair to pull tight the transom above the door. ", "In summer, she stood to open it. ", "Mother and daughter undressed together—routine eliminating all self-consciousness, if not the demure turning away—and then climbed into bed, Annie always on Jim's side. ", "They held hands beneath the covers, or spooned, or merely put fingertips to the other's shoulder or arm. ", "A whispered exchange in the dark: Let's remember the rent money, those dresses from the donation box that will surely fit the Tierney twins, a dime for the missions, darning thread for the Sisters' stockings. ", "Let's remember first Friday tomorrow—no breakfast.", "\n\nMrs. Gertler took to saying when she saw them in the hall, \"More and more like sisters than mother and child,\" and both of them blushed, reluctant to decide which was preferable.", "\n\nThey had dinner at the Tierneys' apartment, Christmas and Easter for certain, but any number of Sundays in between, and Mr. Tierney, Sally saw, was a smiling man with a thick mustache, the source of much of Mrs. Tierney's conversation on weekday mornings when he wasn't there, but, in the flesh, hardly presence enough to make a difference. ", "He sat at the head of the long table, he carved the turkey or the ham, he was gracious to her mother and included Sally whenever he addressed his daughters, but once the meal was over, he retreated behind his newspaper or stood out on the fire escape with a cigar or disappeared into the bedroom for so long that Sally was always startled to see him back again, sometimes dressed in his regal doorman's uniform like an actor on a stage, epaulettes and fringe, the cap tucked under his arm. \"", "No rest for the weary,\" he said. ", "And then he would be gone, the crowded household unchanged by the loss of him.", "\n\nAs a child, Sally believed she would marry a uniformed man and preside over a crowded apartment like the Tierneys', but the appeal of the dream had nothing to do with the lack of a male presence in her life. ", "She felt no such lack. ", "The dream arose merely out of what she recognized as her mother's pleasure in the Tierneys' bustling, comical household—the music and the drama of the talk, the argument, the settling of scores. ", "Her mother took the Tierney children into her arms, the younger ones especially, as if they were her own. ", "She brushed her lips against their hair or rode them on her knee. ", "In Sally's experience, the Tierney household was the only place on earth where her mother agreed to take a drop. ", "Where her cheeks flushed red with laughter. ", "As a girl, Sally took pleasure in imagining herself someday presiding over a household like the Tierneys'—if only because of what a fine gift such a crowded, restful life would make for the mother she loved beyond all reason.", "\n\n\"Are you already thinking about how you'll leave me?\" ", "her mother asked her in the familiar darkness of the room they'd always shared.", "\n\nThere were tears in her mother's voice, and the sound of them brought tears to her own eyes. ", "The truth was, she hadn't thought of her mother at all in that moment when the holy card sunlight fell over her head, or in the hours since.", "\n\n\"There's no room for novices here,\" her mother said. \"", "They'll send you to the motherhouse in Chicago.\"", "\n\nSally said, \"I know.\"", "\n\n\"It's a dirty town, I think,\" Annie said.", "\n\nSally said, \"I'd like to see it.\"", "\n\n\"You'll have to study nursing. ", "Is that what you want?\"", "\n\n\"It is,\" the girl whispered.", "\n\n\"And then you'll have to go where they send you. ", "No guarantee you'll come back home.\"", "\n\n\"Yes,\" Sally said.", "\n\n\"You'll leave the world behind,\" her mother said.", "\n\n\"I know.\" ", "Placid.", "\n\n\"You'll leave me behind.\"", "\n\nIn the pale darkness of the room, Annie turned her head on the pillow. ", "Streetlight shone through the worn shades, so she could just make out the tears that were welling in her daughter's eyes. ", "She saw them spill—a shining, gray, liquid light—and knew in an instant that her words had only honed her daughter's vague resolve.", "\n\nIt was the same mistake her own widowed mother had made when she raised every good objection to Annie's leaving home to follow Jim. ", "He had no job, no prospects, and no promise of marriage had been made. ", "He was—her mother's word—peculiar: laughing and charming in one minute, gone blackly silent the next. ", "His mother, too, was strange.", "\n\nSensible, sensible, everything she said against him. ", "But at the core of every reasonable argument the old woman made, Annie heard her fear. ", "Her need. ", "Annie's two sisters were in London. ", "One brother was in Liverpool. ", "Her elder brother lived just down the road, but he had a brace of small children of his own. ", "Her mother wanted to keep her last unmarried daughter for herself—a stay against the loneliness of her final years.", "\n\nAnnie grew bolder with every good warning her mother spoke. ", "Her resolve swelled, feeding not on the perfect sense her mother made but on her own new disdain for the woman's weakness. ", "Her selfishness. ", "Annie had, until then, thought her mother stronger than that. ", "More capable of great sacrifice for the sake of her child's happiness.", "\n\nIn her mind's eye, she saw a crone's hand reaching up as if from a grave, reaching up to catch the skirt of a girl who had already danced away.", "\n\n\"Oh, we'll see each other again,\" Sally said calmly, into the darkness. \"", "Life is like the blink of an eye.\"", "\n\nOf course, it was Sister Jeanne's voice entirely.", "\n\nSoon enough, the wider world had the child bound for sanctity. ", "Annie saw how the Tierney kids, always rough and ready and full of mischief, began to change in Sally's presence, to gentle themselves, as Annie thought of it, to hush their voices, smiling at her shyly. ", "Soon the Tierney girls began to encircle Sally as they walked to and from school, as if she were the plaster Madonna in a processional. ", "Now the boys, Tom and Patrick, hung back, newly hesitant, nearly awestruck, although—Annie made note—they bumped and elbowed their sisters still.", "\n\nAnnie heard from Sally's teachers how the girl had begun to spend her recess in the church, not the play yard. ", "How she led the eighth grade in the rosary but refused, all modesty, to crown the statue of Mary in May—gave the floral crown, in fact, to a deaf child in one of the lower grades, a child friendless and shy.", "\n\n\"Overdoing it,\" Annie told Mrs. Tierney.", "\n\nThat fall, when Sally moved to the high school, the Tierney girls reported to their mother that some nasty boys had called her \"Sister\"—and Sally had disarmed them all by saying, \"That's right. ", "Sister St. Sally of the Smelly Socks.\"", "\n\nShe eased away with gentle explanations the few boys who pursued her in those years—mostly serious or unpopular boys who hadn't gotten word of her vocation—and rose above the romantic dramas of the other girls—young Matilda Tierney had an operatic heartbreak at sixteen—with benign sympathy, her hands tucked into her sleeves.", "\n\n\"Promised to Christ,\" Sister Illuminata said over her ironing board, full of admiration. ", "Annie silenced the turning mangle, put her wet hands to her hips. \"", "What man accepts a promise from a girl so young?\"", "\n\nA beautiful newcomer passed briefly through the convent—Sister Augustina, elegant and thin, olive-skinned, sunken-eyed, gone back to her family with a collapsed lung in three weeks' time—and Annie saw how quickly Sally adopted the doomed nun's ethereal glide. ", "She knew a romance was brewing in her daughter's brain, the tale of a girl called by God and a selfish widowed mother who barred the door. ", "It was a tale straight out of the Lives of the Saints—the young female saints, anyway, who were always met with opposition by parents or suitors, or who went to their deaths—eyes raised—in their stubbornness to heed the Lord's call. ", "Jesus Himself playing the part of the lovely-eyed beau, dangerous and strange and so alluring. ", "Jim.", "\n\nSister Illuminata understood the case Annie made against her daughter's vocation. ", "She understood the logic of mere mimicry. ", "Who among the Sisters knew better than she how Sally's true nature leaned toward silliness and laughter? ", "But Sister Illuminata had also seen the holy light pass through the basement window. ", "She had seen the girl's face transformed. ", "She told Annie, \"My mother used to say, 'A friend's eye is a good mirror.'\"", "\n\nNow, on her afternoons alone with Sally, while Annie was out at the stores, Sister Illuminata whispered her encouragement. ", "She told the girl that it was not sacrifice that had driven her own vocation, not the sacrifice of life and family and the world—\"giving up this and that and whatnot\" was how she put it, dismissive. ", "It was the notion that Christ Himself had called her to become, in a ghastly world, the pure, clean antidote to filth, to pain.", "\n\nAll things human bend toward it, Sister Illuminata said. ", "They were alone in the basement in the waning afternoons. ", "Because of original sin, she told the girl, all things human bend toward filth, decrepitude, squalor, stink. ", "She pointed to the basement's high windows. \"", "Look out there, if you have eyes to see.\"", "\n\nAll things mortal bend toward ruin, Sister said, which means toward pain, toward suffering. ", "It had always been the devil's intention, she said, to convince human beings they were no more than animals, never angels. ", "Which is why there's nothing like pain to turn a person into a howling beast. ", "Nothing like disease to wear a soul thin. ", "Stink to discourage us. ", "Dirt to drag us down.", "\n\nThe life of a nursing Sister is the antidote to the devil's ambitions. ", "A life immaculate and pure.", "\n\nA Sister makes herself pure, Sister Illuminata said, immaculate and pure, not to credit her own soul with her sacrifice—her giving up of the world—but to become the sweet, clean antidote to suffering, to pain.", "\n\n\"You wouldn't put a dirty cloth to an open wound, would you?\" ", "Sister Illuminata said.", "\n\nSitting on her chair beside the ironing board, her knees beneath the black tunic swollen with arthritis, she cocked her bonnet toward the pile of white handkerchiefs, newly ironed and stacked like cards, as if they illustrated her point. ", "Sally, knowing the routine as she knew every ritual of the convent laundry, took the handkerchiefs from the end of the ironing board and set them carefully in the wicker basket on her mother's sewing table. ", "Her mother would carry them upstairs when she returned, distribute them to each narrow dresser in each of the Sisters' narrow rooms.", "\n\nShe lifted the basket of linen tablecloths and napkins her mother had taken in from the line before she went out. ", "In the hierarchy of her tasks, Sister Illuminata always saved any household ironing for the end of the day, in case her energy flagged. ", "Her best work was done in the morning and was dedicated to the Sisters' habits, or to whatever was going back to the homes of the sick, or to the refreshed donations meant for the poor. ", "Her own habit she washed and ironed on rare occasions. \"", "The last shall be first,\" she said then.", "\n\n\"It's been a long time since I was out nursing,\" Sister Illuminata said as Sally helped her to spread the wide tablecloth over the ironing board. ", "It was a plain rough-spun cotton meant for everyday use, redolent now of the line. \"", "But down here the work's the same, isn't it? ", "A kind of healing.\" ", "And she chuckled at the thought, and then shook her head as if to dispel her own vanity. ", "She directed Sally to fetch the broader, old-fashioned iron that was sitting on the furnace grate. \"", "Down here, we do our best to transform what is ugly, soiled, stained, don't we? ", "We send it back into the world like a resurrected soul. ", "We're like the priest in his confessional, aren't we?\" ", "And chuckled again at her own fancy. ", "Sally's vocation had made her expansive.", "\n\nSister Illuminata sprinkled the cloth. ", "These days she used an old Coca-Cola bottle with a perforated rubber stopper. ", "She licked her scarred fingertip and tested the iron. ", "Attacked the cloth in broad strokes, her elbow pumping. \"", "We send the Sisters out each morning immaculate, don't we? ", "A clean cloth to apply to the suffering world.\"", "\n\nStanding on the other side of the ironing board, Sally said softly, \"It's true.\"", "\n\nThe two worked together in silence, moving the tablecloth across the board, folding it carefully, Sister pressing the hot iron along each of the folded seams. ", "Finally, when the ironing was finished, Sister said, \"There's a name for you.\" ", "She was arranging the still-warm cloth over Sally's forearm, to be carried to the dining room upstairs and laid out in the bottom drawer of the server. \"", "Mary Immaculate,\" she said, still a little breathless from her work. \"", "There's a lovely name for a woman. ", "A great name for a nun.\"", "\nOrders\n\nThere were the Little Sisters of the Sick Poor, the Little Sisters of the Assumption, the Nursing Sisters of the Sick Poor of the Congregation of the Infant Jesus, the Sisters of the Poor of St. Francis, the Dominican Sisters of the Sick Poor of the Immaculate Conception, the Poor Clares, the Little Company of Mary. ", "There were the Sisters of Divine Compassion, of Divine Providence, of the Sacred Heart. ", "There were the Little Nursing Sisters of the Sick Poor of the Congregation of Mary Before the Cross, _Stabat Mater,_ their own order.", "\n\nBut there were also the Daughters of Wisdom. ", "The Daughters of Charity. ", "The Sisters of Charity. ", "The Benedictine Sisters, the Sisters of St. Joseph, the Sisters of Reparation of the Congregation of Mary. ", "There were the Grey Nuns of the Sacred Heart. ", "The Visitation Nuns. ", "The Presentation Nuns. ", "The Handmaids of the Holy Child. ", "The Sister Servants of the Holy Spirit.", "\n\nSister Eugenia admired the Sisters of Mercy. ", "Their foundress—\"like our own,\" she told Annie, as if courting her native pride—was an Irish woman, a daughter of wealth, called by God to serve the sick poor, first in Dublin, then all over Ireland, England, America. \"", "A wonderful order,\" Sister Eugenia said. ", "She named the hospitals they ran, the schools, the very sanatorium upstate where Sister Illuminata had been cured.", "\n\nSister Joseph Mary, who kept the convent's small library, mentioned St. Rose's Free Home for Incurable Cancer, right across the river and run by the Dominican Sisters of St. Rose of Lima. ", "Their founder was the daughter of Nathaniel Hawthorne, Sister Joseph Mary said proudly. ", "Not a Catholic himself, she explained to Annie, but a great writer nonetheless.", "\n\nAnd wasn't there wonderful work being done for the lepers in Hawaii by the Sisters of St. Francis out of Syracuse? ", "Sister Dymphna kept a scrapbook of inspirational things. ", "Annie was shown a folded newspaper clipping that mentioned Mother Marianne Cope. ", "Most of the article was about Father Damien, the priest to the lepers who had first invited the Sisters to Molokai, but Sister Dymphna had underlined in black ink every good word about the nun. ", "There was a photo of a young girl with leprosy—she had a ruined face, a monstrous face, but she wore a cunning skirt and jacket, as good as you'd see on Fifth Avenue. ", "All Mother Marianne's doing, the article said. ", "The nun, the article said, had a flair for fashion.", "\n\nWouldn't Annie be proud to see her own child bringing beauty to these suffering souls?", "\n\nA consensus arose among the Sisters in the convent—perhaps because they had seen the girl helping Sister Illuminata up and down the basement stairs—that Sally would do well with the old folks. ", "The French Little Sisters of the Poor—the order Sister Jeanne herself had once intended to join—did marvelous work in this regard. ", "And the Sisters of Charity had a home for aged domestic workers, immigrants mostly, men and women who had outlived their usefulness and their employers' largesse—faithful servants of the city's faithless titans. ", "Wouldn't Sally be great with them?", "\n\nOr indigent widows. ", "The Carmelites were mentioned. ", "They had a place on Staten Island.", "\n\nAnd then there were the missionary orders to consider: the Foreign Mission Sisters of St. Dominic, the Missionary Sisters of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, of Our Lady of Victory, of the Most Precious Blood. ", "There were the Charity nuns as well, who seemed to be everywhere, doing everything. ", "There were the teaching orders. ", "There were the contemplatives and cloistered, although none of the nuns in the convent believed that such a life would suit Sally—who, they had observed, still fidgeted in the chapel, played with her hair at Sunday mass. ", "Who, even now, despite her call, had to be hushed by her mother when her giddy laughter rose up the basement stairs.", "\n\nOne of the walking orders, then, like their own. ", "An order that would get her out among the poor, out in the air. ", "She might help to care for orphans, childlike as she was. ", "The Sisters of Charity ran the Foundling Home in Manhattan. (\"", "Aren't they a busy bunch?\" ", "Annie asked Mrs. Tierney.) ", "Given her youth and her innocence, her spark of mischief, Sally might, as a Sister, inspire and uplift certain fallen women. ", "The Good Shepherd Sisters had a place for them.", "\n\n\"Give her to the prostitutes,\" Annie told Mrs. Tierney. \"", "Send her to China or Africa. ", "Or to Hawaii with the lepers. ", "That's what they're proposing. ", "Let her work in an orphanage, they're saying, after everything I've done to keep her out of one.\"", "\n\nWhen Sally's high school days were drawing to a close, Sister Lucy ran her yellow eyes over the girl and then told Annie, \"Let her follow me for the week. ", "Let her get a glimpse of the work.\"", "\n\nOn that early morning in June, mother and daughter entered the convent through the front door rather than the back. ", "They waited for a moment, feeling like visitors in the hushed hallway, until Sister Lucy swung toward them, sweeping down the corridor from the kitchen. ", "She wore her cloak and carried her black satchel. ", "She produced a white postulant's veil. \"", "Wear this,\" Sister Lucy said. \"", "You don't want to look like a tourist.\" ", "And smiled thinly at her own joke. \"", "Come with me,\" she said.", "\n\nAnnie helped her daughter fasten the veil and then kissed the smooth top of it as she sent her off. ", "Sally took small, hurried steps, following behind Sister Lucy, as if a long skirt bound her ankles—not her own gait at all. ", "Her mother wondered which of the nuns she was imitating now. ", "She turned. ", "Sister Illuminata was there in the hallway, standing before the basement door, leaning on her cane.", "\n\n\"Baptism by fire,\" Sister Illuminata said.", "\nSister Lucy\n\nSally touched the new veil, once, twice, three times, as she followed behind Sister Lucy. ", "On the avenue she turned her head briefly, trying to capture her own reflection in the various shop windows—watery, she looked, in the morning light. ", "She could barely glimpse her face through the flash of new sun. ", "She'd worn her simplest dress and sensible oxfords from school, but she wanted to see herself with the veil on her head. ", "Wanted to study the transformation. ", "At a corner, she glanced around, hoping to find someone she knew, someone to witness who she had become. \"", "Stop your gaping,\" Sister Lucy said as the light changed and she forged on. ", "Sally followed, her head bowed.", "\n\nAt a gray, four-story apartment building, they turned in. ", "The steps were brick, chipped with wear, a pane in the front door was cracked and repaired with brown tape. ", "The door was unlocked. ", "There was a dirty perambulator in the vestibule, its undercarriage full of rust. ", "A knotted plywood board covering its bed. ", "A smell of cats and damp plaster. ", "Sister Lucy climbed the bare stairs, Sally behind her.", "\n\nThe key to the apartment door was on the ring of keys that was tied to the nun's belt and stored deep in the pocket of her tunic. ", "She fumbled not a bit, finding the right one, opening the door to a spare, neat room: two upholstered chairs, a table, a yellow light through the drawn shades. ", "She spun a bit as she reached to remove her cloak, placed the cloak on one of the chairs, and called out at the same time, \"Good morning, Mrs. Costello.\"", "\n\nA small voice from the next room answered, \"Good morning, Sister. ", "I'm awake.\"", "\n\nNow the nun was tying the apron she had pulled from her bag around her waist. ", "She rolled up her sleeves as she passed through the living room, Sally following, and into a tiny bedroom—darker still, with drawn shades and drawn drapes—an odor of camphor. ", "The woman was in the bed, stirring. ", "Sally saw in an instant, and with a shudder, the absence under the coverlet, the leg gone below the knee.", "\n\n\"I always know when you're awake, Mrs. Costello,\" Sister Lucy said, correcting her. \"", "I wouldn't call out if you were still asleep.\"", "\n\nThe woman was struggling to get up on her elbows. ", "Her long hair was tied into an awkward, uneven braid, and her white, browless face, misshapen from sleep, was small, heart-shaped, finely creased. \"", "I know you always know,\" she was saying, her voice thin and childish, childishly exasperated. \"", "But I don't know how you always know. ", "Who is this?\" ", "Sally smiled with Sister Jeanne's smile, but it didn't warm Mrs. Costello's expression. ", "Despite the woman's pallor, her face conveyed a hot disdain. \"", "Why is it always another one coming into my room?\" ", "she asked, and thrust out her lower lip. \"", "One of you in here is enough.\"", "\n\nSister Lucy made no reply, but bustled. ", "With a sweep of her arms, she opened the drapes, then the shades, and then moved a cane-backed wheelchair from a corner of the room to the side of the bed. \"", "Were you well through the night?\" ", "she asked.", "\n\n\"No,\" the woman said, still looking unhappily at Sally. \"", "Not at all. ", "Terrible pains in my stomach and not a bit of sleep the entire night.\"", "\n\nSister Lucy said, \"Then you were awake when Mr. Costello went out.\"", "\n\n\"Heavens, no,\" Mrs. Costello said, petulant. ", "Plucking at the blankets even as Sister Lucy began to draw them away. ", "There was a brief tug of war. ", "Sister Lucy won. ", "The woman's voice became shrill: \"Do you have any idea what time my husband must leave in the morning, Sister? ", "Who would be awake at that hour?\"", "\n\nNeatly, Sister Lucy removed the edge of the counterpane from Mrs. Costello's grasp. ", "Neatly, she folded down the blankets. ", "The woman's nightgown had risen above her knees. ", "Her legs were chalk white, furred with pale hair. ", "Both the full leg and the shortened one looked lifeless. ", "The woman seemed determined not to move. ", "Suddenly, without preliminaries, Sister Lucy bent down and wrapped her arms around Mrs. Costello, lifted her from her pillow, moved the one full leg to the edge of the bed and then the other. ", "Underneath the blue nightgown, the dull stump of her amputated leg, shining with scars, seemed to thrash about on its own. ", "Sally found herself turning away.", "\n\n\"That accounts for your stomach pains,\" Sister Lucy said. ", "Sally looked again. ", "There were bloodstains on the white sheet, blood on the hem of the nightgown.", "\n\n\"Oh bother,\" Mrs. Costello said.", "\n\nSister Lucy turned to Sally. \"", "Go run a bath,\" she said. \"", "Heat some water on the stove.\"", "\n\nEverything about the small apartment was neat and spare. ", "The bathtub was in the kitchen, draped with a clean white tablecloth that made it look like an altar. ", "A wooden milk box stood beside it, where Sally found the soap and a scrub brush and a box of Epsom salts. ", "She found a cast-iron pot and filled it with water, lit the flame beneath it. ", "She had only begun to run the water for the tub when Sister Lucy wheeled the woman through the doorway.", "\n\nMrs. Costello was still in her nightgown, her loose braid over her shoulder. ", "She held a pair of thin towels on her lap. ", "Sister Lucy, with practiced motions, pushed the chair back and forth until she had gotten it over the threshold and, to her satisfaction, beside the claw-footed tub. ", "She added the hot water from the stove, tested it, added a splash more. ", "She took the towels from Mrs. Costello's lap, handed them to Sally, and then, in an instant, lifted the nightgown over the woman's head. ", "Sally turned away, but Sister said, \"Get cold water on those stains.\" ", "Sally dropped the towels onto the floor and brought the nightgown to the kitchen sink. ", "She ran cold water over the streaked blood. ", "At the sound of Mrs. Costello's cry, she looked over her shoulder to see Sister Lucy with the naked woman struggling in her arms. ", "The contrast of the nun's broad black back, solid and shapeless in her veil, and the woman's thin, bare, flailing white extremities was grotesque, startling. ", "They might have been two distinct species: an ostrich in the arms of a great black bear, a grasshopper in the beak of an enormous raven. ", "Over the nun's shoulder, Sally could see Mrs. Costello's mouth opening and closing. ", "She was making a shrill, piping sound, and as she struggled, she caught Sally's eye with her helpless, panicked own. ", "Her torso was bucking. ", "She seemed determined to knock away Sister's bonnet, to climb over the nun's head. ", "There were long tufts of pale hair, the color of smoke, under her outstretched arms, and again between her thin thighs. \"", "I'm afraid, I'm afraid,\" she was crying, and she glanced down at the tub as if it were a wall of fire. ", "Sister Lucy said harshly, \"Stop it now. ", "Stop your nonsense,\" but lowered the woman into the water with amazing gentleness, making hardly a splash. ", "Her sleeves caught briefly on the edge of the tub, but her veil was expertly tied back with a black ribbon—when had she done that?", "\n\nOnce she was immersed, Mrs. Costello quieted. ", "There was only a whispered, sucking kind of sobbing. ", "Sister Lucy looked around and then barked, \"Take those towels off the dirty floor.\"", "\n\nSally obeyed—although she noticed with some resentment that the worn wooden floor was not at all dirty—and then stood with the two rough towels clutched to her chest. ", "The woman, naked in the water, was awful to see, and yet Sally could not draw her eyes away. ", "She had, on occasion, glimpsed her mother's solid body in the bath, but she had never before seen another human being so exposed. ", "The woman's throat and arms and small puckered breasts were thin, raked, as if the flesh had been scraped away by a dull knife, whittled from Ivory soap. ", "Mrs. Costello's one full leg floated, the other flailed weakly as she moved, now, suddenly, placid, rubbing the soap between her hands, leaning forward to let Sister Lucy wash her back. ", "The tail of her braid was dark with water. ", "A fine pink stain rose into the bath from between her thighs.", "\n\n\"Stand watch,\" Sister said, straightening up, and then left the room.", "\n\nOnce more Mrs. Costello turned her blue eyes on Sally. ", "Her eyes were sunk into her skull, and the surrounding flesh had a dark hue, but the irises themselves were vivid. ", "Her pale nakedness made them more striking still. ", "Sally smiled at her. ", "She could think of nothing to say. ", "Expressionless, the woman stared for what might have been a full minute, and then turned her attention to the soap. ", "The word _brazen_ —her mother's word—came to mind: there was no impulse on the woman's part to cover herself, to apologize, to beg forgiveness for her sorry state.", "\n\nWhen Sister Lucy returned, she had Mrs. Costello's clothes in her arms. ", "A simple dress, wool stockings, underwear. ", "She had a white cloth on top of it all, four safety pins in her mouth. ", "Expertly, Sister pinned the napkin to the inside of the underpants, and then took the towels from Sally's arms. ", "She placed one on the seat of the wheelchair, threw the other over her shoulder. ", "She lifted Mrs. Costello smoothly out of the tub—now the woman was as trustful as an infant—placed her in the chair, and dried her flesh with a vigorous rub. ", "She dressed her, lifting and pushing. ", "At one point, Mrs. Costello began to sob again, but Sister hushed her and she remained hushed. ", "Then, with an abrupt tilt of her head, Sister Lucy told Sally to follow her back into the bedroom, where she maneuvered the chair to the window so Mrs. Costello would be facing out. ", "She lifted the hairbrush from the dresser and handed it to Sally. \"", "Do a nice job\" was all she said. ", "Then she stripped the linen from the bed and left the room.", "\n\nThe woman's long fair hair was coming out of its tangled braid. ", "Even Sally could tell this was the clumsy work of a man. ", "She pulled the damp braid apart as gently as she could while Mrs. Costello fidgeted in her chair, leaning forward abruptly, turning her head to look up and down the street. \"", "Is it a nice day out there?\" ", "she asked, and Sally told her it was. ", "She sat back abruptly. \"", "My husband will carry me down this evening,\" Mrs. Costello said. \"", "We'll sit in the park for a while.\"", "\n\n\"Won't that be nice,\" Sally said.", "\n\nSuddenly Mrs. Costello reached back, swatting at her hands. \"", "Don't pull.\"", "\n\n\"I'm trying not to, Mrs. Costello,\" Sally whispered. ", "She ran her fingers through the last tangles, loosening the braid, releasing the human odor of what her mother called \"winter scalp.\" ", "Carefully, tentatively, she began to brush out the wet ends, her hand held beneath them so she would not pull.", "\n\nShe asked Mrs. Costello, \"Would you like a braid or a bun?\" ", "glancing up as she did, catching in the window before them the faint image of Mrs. Costello's face and, hovering above it, herself, being so kind.", "\n\nMrs. Costello said, thoughtfully, \"Oh my.\" ", "She bowed her head. \"", "What do you like?\" ", "This was a new voice entirely, gentle and demure.", "\n\n\"I'll braid it first,\" Sally suggested. \"", "Then I'll coil it nicely. ", "I do this for my mother sometimes.\" ", "Which wasn't true. ", "Her mother did her own hair. ", "She couldn't have said why she lied.", "\n\nWith more confidence now, she gently ran the brush over the woman's scalp. ", "Mrs. Costello's head was small and her hair was thin—not like Sally's own, she thought, not without vanity, which had a nice wave, or her mother's, which was Irish thick and dark still, her crowning glory, she sometimes said. ", "The brushing stirred the oil on Mrs. Costello's scalp so that the roots of her hair began to grow as dark as the ends that were still wet from her bath. ", "There were gray strands mingled with the blonde and Sally remembered Mr. Tierney last Christmas singing to his wife, \"Darling, you are growing older, silver threads among the gold.\" ", "Three sheets to the wind, Mrs. Tierney had said, turning away from him as he tried to kiss her—his thick mustache and his wet lips—all of them laughing.", "\n\nMrs. Costello bowed her head as the brush ran through it. ", "She seemed to purr a little, a pleasant humming in the back of her throat. ", "There were hairpins in a dish on the dresser. ", "Sally reached for them, glancing at the mirror as she did, at her own face under the short veil. ", "There was a small wedding picture on the doily that covered the dresser top. ", "Mrs. Costello was seated in a chair, two feet beneath her lace skirt. ", "There was a bouquet of silk flowers on her lap. ", "Her husband stood beside her, his bowler hat in the crook of his arm. ", "It was a slimmer, darker version of the milkman she knew. ", "Both of them were somewhat wide-eyed, serious, and maybe afraid. ", "He looked very young. ", "She looked somehow lifeless in her solemn beauty, like one of the china dolls that were slumped together on the dresser. ", "The dolls' faces, too, were finely shattered. ", "One had a glass eye askew.", "\n\nSally turned back to the woman. ", "Mrs. Costello was sitting calmly now, her hands in her lap. ", "Sally felt a surge of pride: she was doing very well here. ", "She coiled the thin braid into a golden bun and pinned it carefully. ", "She patted it with her palms and then stepped around the wheelchair to look at the woman straight on. ", "She bent down, smiling at her.", "\n\n\"You look very nice,\" she said.", "\n\nMrs. Costello raised her head slowly, almost coyly. ", "Her blue eyes sought Sally's, and Sally stepped back a bit to smile at the woman, but then Mrs. Costello's gaze slipped away, to the rooftops across the street. ", "Her eyes grew distant and then glistened with tears.", "\n\n\"I have a pain,\" Mrs. Costello whispered, and she pointed to the place where her foot should have been. \"", "I'm in pain.\" ", "And then she looked at Sally straight on. ", "Her mouth crumpled the way a child's will when it can no longer resist its tears. ", "Sally felt her own lips turn down in sympathy.", "\n\n\"I am abandoned and alone,\" Mrs. Costello said.", "\n\nSister Lucy shouted \"Nonsense\" as she came into the room with the breakfast tray. ", "She glanced at what Sally had done with the woman's hair, but said only, \"Step aside.\" ", "She placed the tray on the dresser, opened a small tea table that had been leaning beside the radiator. ", "Sister's bustling seemed to bring the woman back to herself. ", "She narrowed her eyes.", "\n\n\"Have you told this girl what happened to me?\" ", "Mrs. Costello asked.", "\n\nSister Lucy was placing a tea towel over the woman's chest. \"", "What happened to you?\" ", "She seemed only vaguely interested.", "\n\nMrs. Costello indicated her missing leg with an abrupt, angry gesture. \"", "My foot,\" she cried. \"", "My leg.\" ", "She looked at Sally. \"", "I was bitten by a mad dog, in a yard. ", "I startled him and he came after me. ", "He might have gone for my throat.\"", "\n\nSister Lucy was stirring sugar into Mrs. Costello's tea. \"", "That's ancient history,\" Sister Lucy said placidly.", "\n\nBut Mrs. Costello was now focused on Sally, appealing to her as she spoke. \"", "I grabbed the pole so the devil wouldn't drag me down. ", "I scraped my cheek.\" ", "She touched her face. \"", "They heard me cry out, the other women in the street did. ", "They came running. ", "A big man was with them. ", "He beat the dog away and carried me home.\" ", "Mrs. Costello raised her two hands. \"", "Oh, there was terrible blood.\"", "\n\nSister Lucy said, \"Eat your breakfast.\" ", "She turned to the hope chest at the foot of the bed, opened it, and took out new bed linen. ", "There was the brief scent of cedar as the lid closed again—a green scent in the close room. ", "She said to Sally, \"That chamber pot needs emptying,\" and indicated with her chin the wooden commode beside the bed.", "\n\nBut Mrs. Costello took Sally's wrist to keep her there. \"", "They wrapped the rags too tightly, the women did. ", "Those biddies. ", "My toes turned black. ", "My husband had to carry me to the hospital in the milk cart.\"", "\n\nInfected by the woman's indignation, Sally asked, glancing at Sister Lucy, who was paying no heed, \"Didn't anyone call the Sisters?\"", "\n\nAnd Mrs. Costello shook her head. \"", "They did not,\" she said.", "\n\n\"Someone should have called the Sisters,\" Sally told her.", "\n\nSister Lucy spun on them both. \"", "The chamber pot,\" she said to Sally. ", "And to Mrs. Costello, \"Put your thoughts elsewhere, Mrs. Costello. ", "Eat your breakfast and say your prayers.\"", "\n\nThe nun returned to making up the bed, and Sally and Mrs. Costello exchanged a look that briefly allied them against her. ", "Then Mrs. Costello let go of Sally's wrist and lifted her tea. \"", "This girl should know what happened to me,\" she said to Sister Lucy, and blew gently over the cup. \"", "Shame on you, Sister. ", "You should have told her. ", "How that dog came after me in the yard.\"", "\n\nSister Lucy shook out the fresh sheet, let it billow over the thin mattress.", "\n\n\"And whose yard was it?\" ", "she asked. \"", "Was it your own yard?\"", "\n\nMrs. Costello waved her hand. \"", "I don't know whose yard it was,\" she said.", "\n\nSister Lucy was smoothing down the sheet, leaning over the bed and spreading her arms like a swimmer. \"", "Then you should have minded your own business,\" she said. ", "And then she said to Sally, \"The chamber pot. ", "Emptied and cleaned, if you please.\"", "\n\nSally held her breath as she lifted the porcelain bowl from the seat. ", "She averted her eyes from the yellow liquid and the strings of clotted blood. ", "She emptied the bowl into the toilet and pulled the chain, then washed the thing out in the bathroom sink, uncertain if she should use the clean towel on the bathroom roll or find something else. ", "She carried the wet bowl into the kitchen, thinking to dry it with the towels Mrs. Costello had used in her bath, but they, as well as the bed sheets and the nightgown, were already bundled neatly into a canvas bag, ready to be carried to the convent laundry. ", "The kitchen restored to order. ", "She waved the bowl in the air and carried it back to the bedroom still wet, hoping Sister Lucy wouldn't see.", "\n\nWhen Mrs. Costello had finished her breakfast, the tray removed, the dishes washed and dried and put away, Sister Lucy sent Sally through the three rooms with a dust mop and a broom, while she once more brought the woman to the commode and changed her cloth. ", "And then placed a glass of milk and a plate of bread with butter and sugar on the tea tray, within the woman's reach.", "\n\nFrom the bare living room, Sally heard Sister Lucy say, \"One of the Sisters will be back to give you your lunch today. ", "Mr. Costello has some business in the city. ", "He left a note. ", "He'll be home by dinnertime.\"", "\n\nThere was a silence, and then, slowly, Sally could hear that the woman was crying again. \"", "I'm frightened when he's gone,\" she said, weeping. \"", "I'm afraid when I'm alone.\" ", "She cried gently for a while, childish and heartbroken. ", "And then, suddenly, her voice snapped back into peevishness. \"", "Do you hear me, Sister?\" ", "she called out. \"", "I said I'm afraid.\"", "\n\n\"There's nothing to fear, Mrs. Costello,\" Sister Lucy said coolly. \"", "Say your prayers to pass the time.\"", "\n\nAnd then there was a thump, as of something dropped or thrown. \"", "I have a pain,\" Mrs. Costello cried out. \"", "Do you hear me?\"", "\n\nSister Lucy's voice broke like thunder. \"", "Behave yourself, woman,\" she said. \"", "We'll have no more of that.\" ", "And then, hissing it: \"Say your prayers. ", "Thank God for the life He's given you. ", "Thank Him for your good husband. ", "You'll get no other.\"", "\n\nThere was a fraught silence. ", "Into it, Sister Lucy muttered, \"You might have broken this lamp.\"", "\n\nWhen Mrs. Costello spoke again, her voice was subdued, conspiratorial. \"", "Look at this bun, Sister,\" she said. \"", "It's a rat's nest. ", "Take it out, won't you? ", "Before you go.\"", "\n\nFrom the living room where she stood, Sally could hear the hairpins going back into the dish.", "\n\nShe walked into the kitchen to put away the dustpan and the broom. ", "Her own eyes were smarting with what she knew were foolish tears.", "\n\nWhen she returned to the living room, she could hear Sister Lucy saying, \"I would defer to your husband's good judgment. ", "He'll be back for dinner, as always.\" ", "And then she was walking out of the bedroom, rolling down her sleeves. ", "There was a brush of brown blood on her apron. ", "When she saw Sally, she paused abruptly, as if she'd forgotten her, and then her expression changed again. ", "For a moment she looked at the girl with narrowed eyes, as if she recognized in her a liar or a thief. ", "And then, slowly, a purple hue rose into the nun's stony face. ", "She ducked her head, slipped off her apron, folded it into her bag, and then reached for her cloak. ", "She told Sally to go fetch the bag of laundry.", "\n\nAs they were about to leave, Mrs. Costello called out again. \"", "I'm afraid,\" she said. \"", "Please don't leave me.\"", "\n\n\"Say your prayers,\" Sister Lucy called back.", "\n\n\"I'm in pain,\" Mrs. Costello said, but with diminished insistence.", "\n\n\"You're fine,\" Sister Lucy said, closing the door, locking it with her key.", "\n\n\"I'm afraid,\" Mrs. Costello called again.", "\n\nFollowing Sister Lucy down the stairs, Sally asked, \"Will she be all right?\"", "\n\nSister said, without turning, \"Of course.\"", "\n\nFaintly, she could hear Mrs. Costello's voice still complaining. \"", "Is it her leg that's hurting her? ", "The short one?\"", "\n\n\"That's an imaginary pain,\" Sister Lucy said. \"", "It isn't real.\"", "\n\nSally said, \"But if she feels it.\"", "\n\nSister Lucy said, \"She wants company, is all. ", "She doesn't like to be alone.\"", "\n\n\"Maybe we should stay.\"", "\n\nThey had reached the vestibule. ", "Sister Lucy was sailing out the door.", "\n\nWithout turning, she said, \"There are others with greater need.\"", "\n\nOut on the sidewalk, in the bustling light, Sally paused. ", "She was aware of her white nurse's veil, the glances of passersby. ", "Sister Lucy was forging ahead. ", "Sally had to call \"Sister\" twice to get her to turn. ", "Sister Lucy stood for a moment with her satchel in one hand, a man's watch on a black strap in the other. ", "She thrust out her jaw, a formidable jaw above her white wimple. ", "A question, an impatient one, crossed her masculine face. ", "Slowly, Sally walked to meet her. ", "She would speak up.", "\n\nTwo women passing said, \"Good morning, Sisters.\" ", "A man touched his hat. \"", "Sisters.\" ", "Sister Lucy nodded to the greetings.", "\n\n\"The poor woman,\" Sally said. \"", "An imaginary pain is still a pain, isn't it, Sister?\"", "\n\nSister Lucy said, \"Don't be proud,\" with the swiftness of a slap.", "\n\nShe raised her crooked hand. \"", "Suffering,\" she said, \"does not disguise a true nature. ", "It only lays it bare.\" ", "Inside her bonnet, her eyes were narrowed. \"", "Any woman who wants an excuse to take to her bed will surely find one.\" ", "She paused. ", "She seemed to consider whether she should continue, and then, with the slightest shrug, continued, leaning so close to Sally that the starched edge of her bonnet nearly touched the girl's cheek. \"", "There are women who marry with no idea of what marriage entails,\" she said. \"", "Some of them suffer for it. ", "Babies coming every year. ", "Others impose the suffering on their men.\" ", "She stepped back as if to see if Sally understood. \"", "If the dog that bit her had been drowned as a pup, still Mrs. Costello would have found an excuse. ", "There's a young woman on Baltic with a withered arm and six children.\" ", "She raised her eyebrows, which were flecked with gray. \"", "A woman doesn't need two feet to give her husband a child,\" she said.", "\n\nThen Sister Lucy turned on her heel, stashing the watch into her pocket. \"", "I'm going in here,\" she said, indicating another row house, another chipped stoop and battered door. \"", "I'll be with Mrs. Gremelli in the front room. ", "She needs her dressing changed. ", "Catch up with me there.\"", "\n\nSally stood for a moment, all uncertain. ", "Sister Lucy clucked her tongue and turned her gnarled finger to the laundry bag in the girl's hand.", "\n\n\"Take those soiled bedclothes to your mother,\" she said with exasperated patience. \"", "Then hurry back.\" ", "Adding, as the girl turned away, \"And keep your eyes off yourself if you possibly can.\"", "\n\nThis much became clear to Sally over the course of the next week: Sister Lucy lived with a small, tight knot of fury at the center of her chest.", "\n\nIt had formed itself—a fist clenching—when her mother died of peritonitis, caused by a burst appendix.", "\n\nSister Illuminata, Sally learned, was not the only one tempted to tell stories of her time in the world.", "\n\nSister Lucy's mother had died of peritonitis brought on by a burst appendix when Sister Lucy was seven years old. ", "Appendicitis, Sister Lucy said, is indicated by a terrible pain in the lower right abdomen, fever, vomiting. ", "She told Sally: Waste no time getting the doctor in.", "\n\nSister Lucy said the appendix itself is useless. ", "They were waiting for the trolley together. ", "Sister Lucy did not believe in wasted time. \"", "Why God put it there is a mystery,\" Sister Lucy said.", "\n\nThe peritoneum, Sister Lucy said, is a membrane that covers the organs in the abdomen like a piece of fine silk. \"", "Our Creator is fanciful, perhaps,\" Sister Lucy said, not amused.", "\n\nFor three days Sister Lucy, seven years old, had run, sleepless and terrified, between the kitchen and the sickroom, bearing the wide bowl, empty and then filled, filled and then empty. ", "Filled with a bitter fluid that grew thinner and darker as the days progressed, that smelled of salty bile, and then of blood. ", "The terrible retching. ", "The blackening of her mother's skin.", "\n\nIt is a loss like no other, Sister Lucy said.", "\n\nShe said, Life itself is a bleak prospect to a motherless child.", "\n\nShe was seven years old.", "\n\nIn these matters, Sister Lucy said again—\"Are you listening to me?\"—when there's pain in the abdomen, fever, vomiting, never hesitate getting the doctor in. \"", "Sister St. Saviour, God rest her soul—your namesake\"—Sister Lucy said—\"knew how to put the fear of God into any physician who was dismissive of the poor.\" ", "They were negotiating the reeking hallways of another tenement house. \"", "I'll give her credit for that much,\" Sister Lucy said unhappily, a little breathless.", "\n\nSister Lucy said her older brothers had already left home when her mother died. ", "Her father was a county tax commissioner who had given them all a comfortable life. ", "A good man, but a serious, withholding man, a man of his times. ", "He brought his mother from Germany to raise his only daughter. ", "Sister Lucy said she was a smart girl in school but mostly silent at home after her mother's death: a clenched fist.", "\n\nHer German grandmother told young Sister Lucy that it was easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a tax collector to avoid the torments of hell. ", "But it could be done, if she prayed for her father's soul.", "\n\n\"So that's what I set out to do,\" Sister Lucy said. \"", "Save my father's soul. ", "All of seven years old.\"", "\n\nA rare smile disrupted that straight tight line that was Sister Lucy's mouth. ", "The two were on a bench in the park, sharing the bread-and-butter sandwiches Sister Lucy had brought from the convent.", "\n\nShe and her grandmother visited nearly every church in Chicago, determined to save her father's soul. ", "She knelt patiently beside the old woman. ", "She prayed patiently at those cold altar rails, hour after hour, until her knees grew numb. ", "In the gloom, the gaslight and candlelight, her eyes drifted to the holy scenes and statues behind the altar or over her head. ", "Her eyes grew keen.", "\n\nAs a child, Sister Lucy said, she came to know the beige hills behind the mount called Golgotha as if she had walked them herself. ", "She knew the tufts of weeds in the far distance, the shape of a small enclave of tombs farther still. ", "She knew the feel of the yellow skull at the base of the cross as if she had run her own fingers over its dome; knew the flavor of the dust that covered the ground beneath the horny feet of the centurion. ", "She saw the pallor that engulfed the world the moment Our Lord took His last breath.", "\n\nKneeling beside her pious grandmother, young Sister Lucy studied, too, Mary's assumption into heaven, not merely blue sky and upturned eyes and hands, but the certain fold of cloth at her girded waist, the delicate toe touching a cloud, the brown and gold of a seraphim's curl.", "\n\nShe knew the streets depicted in the Stations of the Cross—uneven paving stones and dark archways—the way the women Jesus greeted touched one another's shoulders as they wept.", "\n\nKneeling beside her grandmother in churches all over the city, knees and feet grown numb, hands and face grown cold, young Sister Lucy entered so fully into these holy pictures (she knew the sharpness of the steel that pierced the Virgin's heart, the velvet flesh of the Savior's throat) that afterward, after she and the old woman left the church and went on with what had to be done, she found herself impatient to return. ", "She found herself annoyed by any ordinary hour, angry to be detained by the petty things that concerned the world. ", "She felt whoever stood before her stood in the way of what she most wanted to see: those places where the essential moments were unfolding, where time and eternity were doing battle, where the terrible death gave way—the stone moved from the mouth of the tomb—and breath returned, flesh grew warm again.", "\n\n\"However,\" Sister Lucy said: those keen eyes that had brought her so vividly into the life of Christ could not be averted at will. ", "When she returned to the streets after her hours of prayer, she saw with the same intensity the raw heel of a shoeless child, the pallor of a consumptive. ", "She saw how the skim of filth, which was despair, which was hopelessness, fell like soot on the lives of the poor.", "\n\nShe saw what needed to be done. ", "Saw that God expected her to do it.", "\n\nSister Lucy told Sally that she would have preferred the silence and the beauty of a contemplative's life.", "\n\nShe said her heart clenched at what God asked of her. ", "But she did not refuse.", "\n\nSister Lucy held Mrs. Gremelli's swollen, shapeless leg in the palm of her hand. \"", "Edema,\" she told Sally, \"when there is an accumulation of fluid like this,\" and pressed a gentle thumb into the flesh. \"", "See how the impression holds. ", "Too much water.\"", "\n\nThe leg was mottled with sores, some of them seeping. ", "Kneeling before the old lady, Sister Lucy peered carefully at each lesion. \"", "From the Latin,\" Sister Lucy said, \" _laesio_ , injury.\" ", "Mrs. Gremelli was a small, heavy woman who smiled toothlessly at Sally and the nun, her hands folded complacently over her mounded belly in its black dress. ", "She had little English, and the small room where she lived was crowded with two beds, a couch, a small table and chair, an avalanche of boxes and newspapers. ", "There was a table shrine with a statue of the Blessed Mother in one corner, squat votive candles crowded around it. ", "There was the odor of garlic and garbage and candle wax. ", "The son who lived with her was at work all day.", "\n\nSister Lucy cleaned the woman's awful flesh with exquisite gentleness and then wrapped it in the fresh bandages that Sister Illuminata and her mother had rolled.", "\n\nShe pulled a clean black stocking up over Mrs. Gremelli's neatly bandaged leg, up over the old, loose flesh of her thigh. ", "She carefully straightened her skirt. ", "Rising from her knees, Sister Lucy placed her hand on the woman's head. ", "Mrs. Gremelli, toothless, eyes clouded with cataracts, looked up at the nun, lifting her spotted arms into the air in gratitude and supplication. ", "Mary at her assumption.", "\n\nLeaving Mrs. Costello's apartment on another morning, the woman crying softly behind them, Sister Lucy said, A woman's life is a blood sacrifice. ", "This was, she reminded Sally, our inheritance from Eve.", "\n\nAlthough, Sister Lucy said, poverty and men made a bad situation—to be born female—worse still.", "\n\nSister Lucy paused on the sidewalk, Sally at her heels, to exchange a word with a pretty young woman who had greeted them warmly. ", "Within minutes, the nun discovered that the girl was newly landed and looking for work. ", "Sister wrote down the name and address of one of the women in the Ladies Auxiliary—a wealthy lady looking for domestic help. ", "A good and safe job, Sister Lucy told Sally as they walked on, something to keep the girl from a premature marriage.", "\n\nGoing up the stairs of another tenement, they met a pregnant woman coming down with two small children before her and an infant riding her big belly. ", "Sister Lucy stopped to look at the children. ", "She clucked her tongue and circled her pinky over the bald patches on their scalps, the round red rash on the baby in its mother's arms. \"", "Ringworm,\" she told Sally. \" _", "Tinea_ is the proper term. ", "Latin for a growing worm.\" ", "Sally felt herself shudder at the phrase. ", "She looked at the inflamed flesh, the missing hair, and then looked away. \"", "I like to use a paste of vinegar and salt,\" Sister Lucy was saying. \"", "Sister Jeanne adds a straw from the Christmas manger. ", "Which is nonsense.\" ", "And then she said, reluctantly, \"Although she does quite well with it.\"", "\n\nSister Lucy took down the woman's apartment number and promised that one of the nursing Sisters would be in to see her. \"", "We'll fix that,\" she said.", "\n\nAnd then she turned her attention to the mother herself, whose dress was slick with dirt and oil, whose hair was pinned up haphazardly under a grimy hat. \"", "Is your husband good to you?\" ", "Sister Lucy asked.", "\n\nSister Lucy told Sally that a good husband was a blessing—a good husband who went to work every day and didn't drink away his salary or lose it at the racetrack, didn't beat his children or treat his wife like a slave—but a rare blessing at best.", "\n\nShe said, Even a good man will wear his wife thin. ", "She said, Even a good wife might transform herself into a witch or a lush or, worse, an infant or an invalid, in order to keep her very good husband out of her bed.", "\n\nSister Lucy waited for Sally's blush to fade—they were having another lunch, this time in the newly cleaned kitchen of the old widower Sister Lucy had just fed and bathed—before she added that some women, wealthy women as well as poor, chose the pretense of illness or delicacy, even madness, over the rough and tumble, the blood and strife, the mortal risks, of a married woman's life.", "\n\nShe said, her keen eyes on the girl, \"I will never encourage the vocation of a young woman who comes to us just after seeing a sister or mother die in childbirth. ", "No woman should enter the convent out of fear.\"", "\n\nSister Lucy said that the best of men—Mr. Costello came to mind—sought the Sisters' help when their wives took ill in this way. ", "They stood in the doorway looking lost and afraid while the nuns sailed in to assess the limp woman on the bed.", "\n\n\"Anemia, you'll often find,\" Sister Lucy said. \"", "Pallor. ", "Weakness. ", "From the Greek this time, _anaimia,_ lack of blood.\"", "\n\nYou can douse her with castor oil, Sister Lucy said, and then send the husband, or one of the children, off to the butcher for a piece of liver while you do your best with the place. ", "Send the filthy laundry to Sister Illuminata, bathe the children, comb the nits out of their hair, open the windows, beat the rugs. ", "Feed the family a decent meal, after which, perhaps, the mother will stir herself to sit up at the table and chew some small pieces of the liver.", "\n\nThe life might return to her then, iron restored to her bloodstream. ", "Or it might not.", "\n\nSister Lucy told Sally that never having had a lazy mother herself, she might not know that there was a distinction between the wife who was sick and then recovered and the wife who was recovered but not yet willing to give up the pleasures of being sick.", "\n\n\"Never waste your sympathy,\" Sister Lucy said. ", "They were going into Mrs. Costello's once again. \"", "Never think for a minute that you will erase all suffering from the world with your charms.\"", "\n\n\"The poor we will always have with us,\" Sister Lucy said more than once in the week that Sally followed her. ", "She said it without kindness or even resignation. ", "She seemed only annoyed. \"", "If we could live without suffering,\" Sister Lucy said, \"we'd find no peace in heaven.\"", "\n\nThey were on their way back to the convent at the end of a long day, when Sister Lucy, walking ahead of Sally, stopped abruptly. ", "There was a small girl on a stoop, wearing what looked like a bigger sister's nightgown, a pair of rough shoes on her bare legs. ", "As Sally caught up, she heard Sister Lucy asking her severely why she wasn't in school. ", "She called the girl by name, Loretta. ", "Little Loretta said she hadn't gone to school today because her sisters couldn't take her. ", "And when Sister Lucy asked why that was, the girl lowered her chin to her raised knees. ", "Sister had to say, \"Speak up, child.\"", "\n\nThe little girl spoke up reluctantly, all in a rush. \"", "Charlie got mad at us this morning because we were laughing too much,\" she said. \"", "He locked up Margaret and Tillie and wouldn't let them out.\"", "\n\nSister Lucy looked to the building behind the girl. \"", "They're still inside?\"", "\n\nAnd the girl, big-eyed and tangle-haired, nodded slowly.", "\n\nSister Lucy shook back her sleeve and, without another word, climbed the stairs. ", "Wordlessly, Sally and the little girl followed.", "\n\nThis was a nicer building. ", "There was carpet on the stairs. ", "A radio playing gentle music somewhere. ", "The smell of floor polish. ", "At the door of the little girl's apartment, Sister Lucy raised her fist to rap, and then, with hardly a pause for a reply, reached for the knob and let herself in. ", "There was a long corridor with little light, airless and hot. ", "At the end of the corridor, a pretty room with dark furniture trimmed in knotted tassels, a table draped with a velvet shawl, a large gilded mirror. ", "A small pile of schoolbooks was spilled across the plush seat of a chair.", "\n\nSister Lucy stood for a moment to call out, \"Girls?\" ", "but then turned down another, shorter corridor to a closed door. ", "Again she knocked, and again she reached for the knob without a pause. ", "She opened the door and said, \"Glory be to God.\"", "\n\nSally looked over the nun's shoulder into the dim room. ", "She saw two girls about her own age sitting at either end of a rumpled bed. ", "One, somewhat bigger, was in a skirt and a satin slip; the other, thinner and younger, wore a white nightgown like Loretta's. ", "Both were tied to the iron bedposts by dark leather belts that crossed and recrossed their wrists. ", "The girls struggled to sit up when they saw the nun. ", "As she rushed toward them, they both began to cry piteously, saying together, \"Oh, Sister.\" ", "It was clear from their faces that they had been crying all day. ", "There was a smell of urine in the airless room. ", "The smell of sweat.", "\n\nSister Lucy was already untying the belt that held the bigger girl to the head of the bed. ", "Sally fumbled, pulling at the belt that bound the other—two belts, in fact, one a man's long belt with a solid buckle, the other the thin strap that might have held the schoolbooks in the living room. ", "Both were wrapped tightly around the peeling iron rail and the girl's thin wrists. ", "Both belts had raised fiery stripes on her skin, turned her fingertips purple.", "\n\nThrough their tears, the girls told Sister Lucy that they had laughed too much this morning, getting ready for school, and made their brother angry. ", "They rubbed their wrists. ", "The younger girl had wet through her nightgown and blushed in shame. ", "The older, in a gabardine school skirt but no blouse, only her satin slip, cupped her hand to her neck. ", "Sally saw she was trying to hide a bruise there—it looked like a rosebud, a small coin. ", "She saw that Sister Lucy, too, was assessing the mark. ", "Her eyes narrowed. ", "Sally wondered if it wasn't a bit of ringworm on the girl's throat.", "\n\nAs they moved off the bed, still whimpering, Sally followed the nun's sharp eyes to the series of raised red welts on their calves and their thighs. ", "Strap marks.", "\n\nSister Lucy said, \"Where is your mother?\"", "\n\n\"Working,\" the girls said together. ", "Gone with her family, they said, the family she cooked for, to their summer place for the week. ", "They said Charlie was in charge.", "\n\nSally saw the anger pull at Sister Lucy's lips and at the corners of her eyes. ", "She imagined it rising up like something awful, undigested, from her throat, from that knot of fury in her chest.", "\n\nSister Lucy told Sally, \"Take Loretta to the kitchen. ", "See if there's anything for her to eat. ", "Wash her hands and face while you're at it.\"", "\n\nThe little girl drew back as Sally reached for her. \"", "Do as I say, child,\" Sister Lucy said. ", "Cold. ", "Insistent.", "\n\nSister Lucy closed the door behind them as they left. ", "Sally heard her say, \"Let me see your neck.\"", "\n\nThe kitchen was large, neat and charming, although the remnants of a breakfast were still on the table: half-eaten eggs in egg cups, dregs of milk, and crusts of cold toast. ", "The laughter that had angered their brother must have begun here.", "\n\nThe table itself was covered with a clean linen cloth decorated with cross-stitched flowers in blue thread. ", "There were crisp blue curtains at the window. ", "A pretty ceramic kettle on the stove. ", "A nicer apartment altogether, Sally noticed, than her own, but, she gathered, a widow's apartment nonetheless. ", "Another mother who went out to work. ", "The icebox was well stocked with milk and cheese and a small ham. ", "While Sally made the girl a sandwich, Loretta explained again that Charlie was her brother and he was in charge whenever their mother went away. ", "Her mother was a cook for a family in New York City. ", "Charlie, Loretta said, spanked her sisters when they were bad, but never her. ", "She was his favorite, she said happily.", "\n\nSuddenly the little girl paused, kneeling on her chair, her chin in the air. ", "Some uncertainty, or perhaps fear, crossed her small face. ", "Sally heard footsteps in the long hall, and then the boy himself appeared in the kitchen doorway. ", "He was a tall, dark-haired boy no older then she, in a white school shirt rolled at the sleeves, a loosened school tie. ", "He said to her, only a little surprised, \"Hello, Sister,\" even as Loretta flew into his arms, her bare legs going around him. \"", "Hiya, pipsqueak,\" he said. ", "His arms beneath the rolled-up sleeves were brown and muscular. ", "He was as big and broad as a grown man.", "\n\nAnd then, over the child's head, he asked, \"What's up?\"", "\n\nLoretta whispered, \"Sister Lucy is here again. ", "She's talking to the girls.\"", "\n\nCharlie said, \"Oh yeah?\" ", "He lowered the little girl to her feet and then looked at Sally. ", "He was close enough that she could smell the perspiration from him. ", "A scent she associated with the subway or the trolley, with the workingmen who boarded late in the day, carrying lunch pails. ", "His eyes were dark blue, and one strand of his thick black hair fell across his forehead. ", "Casually, he reached up to smooth it back. ", "There was a deep dimple in his chin, the trace of a five o'clock shadow, handsome on a boy so young. ", "He was handsome. \"", "You a novice?\" ", "he asked her. ", "She said she was just following Sister Lucy today. ", "Learning things.", "\n\nHe nodded. ", "Put his hands in his pockets and then leaned in the doorway, one foot kicked up on its toe, still watching her. ", "His shoulders were broad beneath the white shirt. ", "He was tall, over six feet, she guessed. ", "He cast his eyes around the room, smiling with straight white teeth. ", "His eyes were the color of deep water. ", "He was as handsome as a movie star. \"", "Sister Lucy's a pistol, ain't she?\" ", "he said. \"", "Six-shooter Lucy, I call her.\"", "\n\nSally saw Sister Lucy herself come through the room behind him. ", "She was carrying her black bag. ", "The two girls followed at some distance, cowering, it seemed, at the entrance to the short hall. ", "They were both dressed now, their hair combed.", "\n\nSally had not realized that Sister Lucy was such a short woman, dumpy, even, in her dark habit, until she stood before Charlie and raised her crooked finger toward his face. ", "He looked down at her.", "\n\n\"You lay a hand on these girls again and I'll have the police here,\" Sister Lucy said.", "\n\nThe boy only smiled. ", "He seemed both kind and tolerant. \"", "They were acting up,\" he said patiently. \"", "My mother told me to spank them when they act up. ", "I'm in charge,\" he added. \"", "They have to learn to behave.\"", "\n\n\"Your mother told you,\" Sister Lucy repeated sarcastically, hissing it. \"", "I know your mother. ", "She told you no such thing.\" ", "Her finger was trembling. ", "Even her bonnet and her veil seemed to be trembling. ", "She pumped her elbows in her dark sleeves: bellows to the fire of her indignation. \"", "Locking them up all day,\" she said, growing shrill. \"", "Keeping them from school.\" ", "Her voice broke: \"You've left welts on their flesh.\" ", "Even her jowls were trembling against the tight linen of her cowl. ", "She closed her hand into a fist, shook it in his face. \"", "I know what else you've done to these girls,\" she said, nearly shrieking it. \"", "Sinful.\"", "\n\nHandsome Charlie shrugged, uncrossed his legs, folded his arms across his chest, stood even taller. \"", "When my mother is away at work,\" he said again, \"I'm in charge here.\"", "\n\nHis smile was a kind of sneer, but it was lopsided, too, which made it boyish, even charming. ", "His bare forearms were covered in dark hair. ", "Above the casually rolled sleeves, there were muscles beneath the white cloth. ", "His legs were long. ", "His hips narrow. ", "He said, \"Lookit, Sister,\" and then paused. ", "He glanced at Sally, waved a hand in her direction. ", "His eyes were deep blue. \"", "These girls ain't obedient, like this holy one. ", "They need to be disciplined.\" ", "He shook his head sadly, amicably. ", "Then he shrugged again and added, \"I'm sorry to have to tell you what you don't know.\"", "\n\nSally felt her cheeks burn.", "\n\n\"You brazen boy,\" Sister Lucy said evenly. ", "She had gotten control of her voice. ", "Little Loretta was at her brother's side, looking up at the nun with big eyes.", "\n\nGlancing at the child, Sister Lucy said, \"I'll have the police here if you so much as touch these girls again.\" ", "She said, \"I'll go straight to the Monsignor.\"", "\n\nNow there was no avoiding how helpless, how foolish, Sister Lucy seemed, shaking a fist at him, trembling with rage in her long black skirt and her silly bonnet.", "\n\nCharlie reached down to take little Loretta's hand. \"", "Okay, Sister,\" he said easily. \"", "Calm down now. ", "I had to teach them a lesson and I did.\" ", "He narrowed his glistening eyes, still smiling. \"", "You can go mind your own business now.\"", "\n\n\"Beast,\" Sister Lucy whispered, turning away. ", "She said, \"Come,\" to Sally, and Sally brushed past him to get through the door. ", "He might have been laughing under his breath. ", "Loretta said, \"Bye-bye.\"", "\n\nIn the living room, the two girls were leaning together like victims from a storm. ", "Sister Lucy told them, \"If he puts another hand to you, you go over to the convent at St. Ann's. ", "Immediately.\"", "\n\nThe girls said they would, but Sally wondered how they would go over to the convent at St. Ann's if they were tied with leather belts to their bedstead. \"", "Don't hesitate,\" Sister added weakly, as if she understood this, too. ", "Her eyes went to the elder of the two, whose hand was once again cupping the mark on her neck. \"", "Don't let him touch you,\" Sister said.", "\n\nGoing down the apartment house stairs, which were well tended, not a trace of cobweb or dust, Sister Lucy said, \"If I were a man, I'd take a strap to him myself.\"", "\n\nWhen they reached the street, Sister Lucy said, \"Come,\" once more, and then turned away from the trolley stop that would have taken them back to the convent. ", "Sally followed her, walking rapidly—\"Good evening, Sisters,\" people whispered—four blocks, six blocks, until they came to a squat red church with a sprawling school. ", "They passed them both, passed the empty playground, and then climbed the steps of a brown rectory. ", "Sister Lucy rapped at the door and waited on the doorstep with her head down, her foot tapping impatiently. ", "The woman who answered was plain and gentle-looking, her salt-and-pepper hair curled tightly to her head. ", "She wore a calico apron over her dress.", "\n\nSister said, \"Hello, Trudy, is he in?\" ", "and the woman nodded, \"Just upstairs,\" and then added, as a warning, \"He's just about to sit down to his dinner. ", "He's got a Holy Name meeting at seven.\"", "\n\n\"Only a minute,\" Sister Lucy said, and the woman, reluctantly, invited the two of them in.", "\n\nThe vestibule was chilly, despite the June weather, and as dim as winter. ", "There were two leather chairs, thin-backed and slim, flanking an icon of a glowering, dark-eyed male saint. ", "There was a rich Persian rug over the tiled floor. ", "The vestibule held the stone smell of a church, although there was a whiff as well of seared meat from the kitchen. ", "Sister Lucy told Sally to sit, but she continued to stand. ", "She paced, moving her free hand, flicking it back and forth as if she were dealing cards or quickly saying her beads, although the hand was empty.", "\n\nSally had never before seen Sister Lucy expend so much energy on what seemed a pantomime.", "\n\nBeyond her, the doorway through which the housekeeper had disappeared offered promise of a warmer part of the house. ", "There was a table with a Tiffany lamp in a narrow passage, and then a high-backed couch and a mullioned window. ", "Sally glimpsed the turning of a staircase, and after what seemed more than a few minutes, she saw the black shoes and the cassock hem of a priest descending.", "\n\nThe priest was another large man, perhaps even taller than Charlie. ", "He filled the doorway when he appeared—large chest and big head and thick dark hair; a belly, covered by his black soutane, that seemed to precede him into the room. ", "He looked as if he'd just finished shaving. ", "His fair face was flushed around the jaw, a pinprick or two of fresh blood. ", "He greeted Sister Lucy by name and gave a thin smile to Sally. ", "There were black hairs on the backs of his big hands. ", "His eyes were very small in his large face. ", "Sister Lucy said, \"A word,\" and indicated the passageway behind them.", "\n\nThe priest held out his arm, and Sister Lucy walked ahead only a few steps before she turned to look up into his face. ", "Sally saw the priest bend to put his ear toward Sister's bonnet. ", "She saw him glance her way as Sister spoke. ", "He may have winked. ", "Sally looked away. ", "This secrecy on Sister Lucy's part seemed foolish since Sally had been there herself to see the girls with their wrists tied and the strap marks on their skin.", "\n\nShe heard Sister Lucy say his name, Charlie. ", "She said, \"Tied by their wrists.\"", "\n\nSally realized that she could not bring herself to imagine it, that handsome boy—how sweetly he had called his sister \"pipsqueak\"—wielding his belt like Simon Legree. ", "She wondered if it could be possible, if there hadn't been some misunderstanding. ", "Perhaps the girls had been very bad.", "\n\nThe nun's sibilant whispering into the priest's big ear gave way to something more solid. \"", "Tonight, Father,\" she said, insisting. \"", "I'd hate to have another morning go by. ", "Their mother won't be back until Sunday.\"", "\n\nThe priest said, \"All right, Sister.\" ", "Now he had his hand on her elbow, he was guiding her to the door. \"", "I'll go over there tonight,\" he said. \"", "Put the fear of God into him. ", "As soon as I've had my dinner.\"", "\n\nSister Lucy said, \"Thank you, Father.\" ", "But Sally knew she was not appeased.", "\n\nIt was growing late as they walked back to the trolley stop. ", "Although the sky was light blue, a sense of the coming night was already pooling at the feet of the people going by—\"Good evening, Sisters\"—pooling along the cobbled streets, along the silver trolley tracks, at curbs and in the alleyways. \"", "A cruel and evil boy,\" Sister Lucy said, shaking back her sleeve as they waited for the trolley. \"", "Cool as a cucumber. ", "Brazen.\" ", "She seemed to be trembling still, and Sally realized, standing beside her, that they were now shoulder to shoulder. ", "That Sister Lucy, ramrod straight as she always was, as Sally had always known her, might even be shrinking.", "\n\nTelling it later, our mother said, \"Sister Lucy didn't scare me so much after that.\"", "\n\n\"If I were a man,\" Sister Lucy muttered once more, \"I'd wipe that smile off his face.\" ", "She added, over her shoulder, as they climbed the steps into the car, \"And you standing there making eyes at him was no help to me at all.\"", "\n\nAt the end of Sally's week with Sister Lucy—on a morning her mother let her stay in bed—the nun came halfway down the basement stairs, pausing when Sister Illuminata and Annie both looked up at her. \"", "If there's a vocation there,\" Sister Lucy said, \"I'll eat my hat.\" ", "She shook her black sleeve and touched her back. ", "Under her arm, the basket woven of unblessed palms. ", "Sister Lucy would be taking her turn to beg today. ", "A duty she despised, silently. \"", "I love her like a daughter,\" Sister Lucy said with no change in the harshness of her tone, as if love, too, was an unpleasant duty. \"", "Marriage might settle her. ", "Not the convent.\"", "\n\nAnnie smiled, but when she turned to Sister Iluminata, the old nun was hunched over her ironing.", "\n\n\"And what do you say, Sister?\" ", "Annie asked her when Sister Lucy was safely upstairs.", "\n\nSister Illuminata shook her head, shook the iron against the board. \"", "I say give God what He asks for.\"", "\nReparation\n\nSister Jeanne found Annie in the convent's drying yard. ", "She gestured that the two should sit, and Annie pinned the last cloth to the line and then joined her on the wrought-iron bench that had been tucked into this corner of the yard ever since the convent was a rich man's house, elegant and new. ", "The story in the neighborhood was that the house had been bequeathed to the Little Nursing Sisters in Chicago fifty years ago, when its owner washed up there, having lost his family's fortune to drink and depravity. ", "The story was that the man died in the Little Nursing Sisters' care, and had asked on his deathbed that they take his house in Brooklyn in reparation for his sins.", "\n\nSister llluminata dismissed this tale when Annie asked about it. ", "Said the house was a gift from a good man who wanted only to help the poor.", "\n\nThe bench was under a narrow arbor, now overgrown with honeysuckle vine and curling ivy, fitted with a statue of St. Francis. ", "The folds of the saint's robes were tinted green with oxidation; ivy had grown up around the creatures at his feet. ", "The black leaves were repeated in the carvings on the bench, which were also touched with a blue-green dust. ", "Annie made note to brush down Jeanne's veil for her before they went inside.", "\n\nThe shade gave little relief from the day's heat. ", "Annie watched as the nun found her handkerchief and wiped the perspiration from her temples, from the pale down above her lip. ", "That any of the nuns could bear their habits on these hot city days, could bear especially the starched linen at their throats and their chins, filled Annie with admiration—and some pride that she and Illuminata were able to keep most of them smelling sweet, at least through the first hours of these stifling mornings.", "\n\nAnnie had opened her own blouse three buttons more than was modest as she came out into the yard with the wet wash. ", "With the clothespins in her mouth, she had glanced down at her breasts as she pinned the nuns' summer shifts to the line. ", "She recalled without irony or shame the pleasure of his cheek against her skin.", "\n\nPoor Sister Jeanne had a sunken look about her. ", "Broad creases were pressed into her face, just under her eyes. ", "She had been out of the convent for a string of days, and she recounted her casework: a widow grown blind had been resettled in the French Little Sisters' home for the aged, a young mother with milk fever was restored, her baby thriving once more. ", "Those First Communion dresses Annie had bleached and mended were much appreciated by an Italian family of seven girls—four of their own and three orphaned cousins. ", "Although one of the girls was determined to wear red shoes. ", "Mr. Bannister, the old veteran, the old bachelor, had both Sister Jeanne and Sister Agatha with him as he went through his last agony, which had taken four long days. ", "But he had not died alone.", "\n\nAnnie, for her part, said she'd met the new president of the Ladies Auxiliary, nicer and younger than Mrs. McShane. ", "She wanted to raise money through a dinner dance at a fine hotel in the city, not the usual bridge party here at the convent. ", "Both women pulled down the corners of their mouths and raised their eyebrows, their familiar, unspoken conspiracy against the society ladies who did so much good. _", "Fancy-dancy_ , their expressions said.", "\n\nAnnie knew these women called her \"that poor widow\" when her back was turned. ", "To her face they said \"Annie, dear.\"", "\n\n\"Have you had an afternoon to yourself all this while?\" ", "Sister Jeanne asked her.", "\n\nAnd Annie nodded. \"", "You know me,\" she said. \"", "I catch my breath when I can,\" evoking Sister Lucy.", "\n\nSister Jeanne nodded. ", "The unspoken forbearance the two afforded Sister Lucy was a joke they'd shared since the first days of their friendship.", "\n\nThey were in the shade of the narrow arbor, although bright sunlight was moving leisurely against the white shifts on the line. ", "The back of the convent rose over the yard, the sky reflected in each of the convent's windows. ", "Sister Jeanne's white hands were resting in her lap. ", "Annie saw her own work on the edge of the nun's worn sleeve, the black stitches small and neat. ", "Both women wore gold wedding bands. ", "Annie reached for Sister's hand, patted it affectionately. ", "Something miraculous about how familiar and smooth it was, despite the years of hard work.", "\n\nThey had been friends for a long time.", "\n\nAnnie nodded toward the building. \"", "Which was St. Saviour's room?\" ", "she asked, and Sister Jeanne looked up, smiling.", "\n\n\"First floor,\" she said. \"", "On the corner there.\"", "\n\nAnnie knew she'd been told this before.", "\n\n\"When she died,\" Sister Jeanne said softly, and with her childish amazement, \"there was the most beautiful scent. ", "Like roses it was. ", "I know I've told you.\"", "\n\nAnnie nodded again. ", "She'd been heavily pregnant with Sally on the day St. Saviour died. ", "Another hot day like this. ", "Sister Jeanne had come to the apartment that morning as she always did, with fresh milk and clean linens and an alcohol rub to keep her cool. ", "There were no tears between them, only laughter, as the little nun bathed her swollen ankles with cool water and the two considered St. Saviour in heaven, imperious and proud, all her pain ended.", "\n\nIt was Sister Jeanne who suggested Annie give her baby the nun's name in baptism. ", "A formidable patroness for the child.", "\n\nWide-eyed, Sister Jeanne had described for Annie that morning the nun's last breath, the peace of it, and then the odor of sanctity filling the hushed room. ", "The beauty of heaven in the scent, Sister Jeanne had said. ", "Just the smallest notion of it—of what is promised. ", "As much of heaven's beauty, Sister Jeanne had said, full of wonder, as we on earth can bear.", "\n\nAnnie didn't doubt the report. ", "Sister Jeanne couldn't tell a lie. ", "But Annie was inclined to reconcile such miracles with the sensible world. ", "Sister St. Saviour died in July. ", "The windows were surely open—or, if they weren't, Sister Jeanne, who held on to the old superstitions, would have opened one the moment the old nun passed. ", "Surely roses bloomed somewhere in the neighborhood.", "\n\nAnnie imagined that St. Saviour, who disdained all superstition, would have said the same.", "\n\nLooking up at the room—whose was it now?—Annie said, \"You're here to tell me I should let Sally go.\"", "\n\nSister Jeanne said, \"Let her try.\"", "\n\n\"Did I ever believe I could stop her?\"", "\n\nSister Jeanne laughed and lifted both their hands. ", "She brought their entwined fingers to her lips, kissed Annie's knuckles, her lips warm and dry, and then dropped their hands together into her lap. ", "She looked up, tilting her chin so the sun that filtered through the ivy could reach her face.", "\n\n\"I was going to enter a teaching order,\" she said, \"but when I finished my novitiate, God asked that I go out among the poor, to nurse. ", "My confessor suggested the French Little Sisters. ", "But that's not the address he wrote down.\" ", "She laughed. \"", "He was busy with many things, Father was, I don't blame him. ", "And so I presented myself here. ", "When I realized the mistake I'd made, Sister St. Saviour said, 'God's will.' ", "So I stayed where He'd brought me.\"", "\n\n\"It wasn't Chicago,\" Annie said.", "\n\nSister Jeanne said, \"It could have been the moon. ", "I'd never been to this part of Brooklyn before. ", "I grew up in the Bronx.\"", "\n\nAnnie glanced at the nun. ", "It was as much as Jeanne had ever said about her life in the world. ", "She was no Illuminata, with her tedious childhood tales. ", "Annie wondered where they were now—her people in the Bronx, a mother or a father surely, siblings perhaps—were they all dead or merely forever unspoken of? ", "Was there a difference?", "\n\nAnnie cast her eye over Sister Jeanne's small frame, the short lap, the childish black shoes, neatly tied, just touching the sparse grass at their feet. ", "She wondered what had convinced her as a girl to be confined to this lonely life of hard labor. ", "What had made her believe she was capable of such long sacrifice—tiny as she was, gentle as she was, no training, no idea what she would find in this part of the world, much less in the hidden rooms of the city's most desolate? ", "What drove her to think she could endure this life?", "\n\n\"How did your mother feel about your vocation?\" ", "Annie asked her.", "\n\nSister Jeanne paused. ", "And then said, tentative, \"She was happy in heaven, I'm sure.\" ", "She raised her handkerchief again, delicately blotting her lips and her chin.", "\n\n\"If Sally goes to Chicago,\" Annie said simply, \"it will break my heart.\"", "\n\nSister Jeanne turned her white bonnet toward the convent. ", "The rattle and shout of the street reached them faintly. ", "A garbage can falling. ", "The grinding of gears. ", "In an interval of quiet, Sister said, \"I saw him. ", "When Sally was young. ", "Here,\" and she bowed her head toward the convent's windows, lit blue and white by the sky and the summer clouds. \"", "Jim, I mean. ", "In his brown suit. ", "Looking like himself. ", "Solid as stone.\"", "\n\nAnnie nodded. ", "Sister Jeanne could not tell a lie. \"", "It was Jim?\"", "\n\n\"It was,\" Sister Jeanne said, full of regret.", "\n\n\"You never saw him alive,\" Annie said.", "\n\nAnd Jeanne shook her head. \"", "No, I didn't.\"", "\n\n\"But you recognized him.\"", "\n\nShe whispered, \"I did. ", "Poor man.\" ", "And she followed this with a sudden breath, taken through her teeth, as if in response to a sharp and sudden pain in her side. \"", "What worse suffering can there be for a soul?\" ", "she said. \"", "To be trapped forever in these bodies of ours. ", "No relief.\"", "\n\nThere was another spasm of street noise, and then Sister Jeanne turned Annie's hand over in her own. ", "She bowed her head and placed a finger into Annie's palm, gently tracing a line as she spoke, like a child enumerating a fragile logic, giving it careful voice.", "\n\n\"What I wanted to tell you is this,\" Sister Jeanne said softly, cautiously. \"", "Here's redemption, see? ", "Here's forgiveness. ", "Through his child. ", "Through her vocation. ", "Here's the forgiveness of sin.\"", "\n\nAnnie raised her eyes to look over her friend's bowed head, looked to the winding vines above her. ", "For a moment, an image of him trapped, his body trapped in the tangled shade, flitted across her eyes. ", "A glimpse of his pale forehead, his dark brows, the black corner of his grin.", "\n\nHe'd lost a tooth in the days before he died—how long since she remembered this? ", "His teeth were always trouble to him.", "\n\nWhat greater torment for a man whose sin was suicide than to be trapped forever in the body he'd sought to shed?", "\n\nThe sun moved through the leaves. ", "She felt it touch the top of her head, her throat. ", "The pale skin beneath the opened buttons of her blouse. ", "Jim, too, had put his warm cheek to her breast, even on the last night of his life. ", "Sally inside her then, no bigger than a heart.", "\n\nShe took her hand from Sister Jeanne's. ", "Sat up straighter, looking out across the yard.", "\n\n\"What you're telling me,\" she said. ", "And paused. ", "Sister Jeanne's face was attentive but weary. ", "It was full of affection. ", "They had been friends for a long time. \"", "What you're saying is that I haven't suffered enough.\" ", "She paused again. ", "The perspiration was once more beaded on Sister Jeanne's pale lip. ", "A drop of it, the size and shape of a tear, gathered at her temple, rolled down her cheek. \"", "These eighteen years,\" Annie said. \"", "You're saying they haven't brought me suffering enough. ", "Loneliness enough. ", "You're saying I should lose my daughter, too. ", "My own. ", "So that God can forgive him.\"", "\n\nOnly a narrow ray of sun, filtered through the black leaves of ivy, caught Sister Jeanne's white bonnet. ", "Inside its depths, shadow and light, she was smiling, her eyes sunken and drawn and the perspiration sparkling on the fine hairs above her lip. ", "It was the way she might smile at a misbehaving child—the reprimand hardly outlasting the fond absolution. ", "She reached again for Annie's hand, took it in both of hers. \"", "Oh no,\" she said. \"", "Not Jim. ", "I'm not talking about Jim. ", "He's a lost soul, poor man.\" ", "She paused. \"", "I'd never have seen him here if there was any hope of heaven for him.\" ", "And she shook her head—resigned to the fact, but still not without pity. \"", "What I'm saying is, it's so you can be forgiven, see?\" ", "And she bit her lip, as if to suppress a laugh, to suppress her own wonder and delight at this turn of good fortune. \"", "It's your sin I mean. ", "Your soul.\"", "\n\nIt was the first Annie ever knew that Sister Jeanne had made note of how she spent her afternoons.", "\nOvernight\n\nIn late September, Sally went with her mother and Sister Jeanne to Pennsylvania Station. ", "An overnight train. ", "There was no money for a Pullman, so she would have to sit up in the open coach, but she was young, as the Sisters were always reminding her. ", "She would be fine.", "\n\nHer nearly new valise was on the rack above her head. ", "It was secondhand but quite lovely: lacquered beige rattan with caramel leather trim, a gold clasp repaired, free of charge, by the shoemaker who served the convent. ", "It contained only what the Sisters at the motherhouse had required her to bring: six pairs of stockings, six pairs of knickers, three muslin nightgowns without ornamentation, four chemises, woolen gloves, black shoes.", "\n\nSally had five dollars in her wallet and fifty pinned to the lining of her purse, to be turned over to the Sisters in Chicago when she arrived.", "\n\nShe sat on a bench seat beside the window. ", "Looked out to see her mother on the platform, her arm through Sister Jeanne's. ", "They were leaning together, the two of them, Sister Jeanne coming only to her mother's shoulder. ", "Her mother looked nice in her hat and her gray Sunday suit. ", "The unaccustomed scent of the face powder and lipstick she donned only for a trip to Manhattan lingered on Sally's cheek. ", "They could have been something from a movie, her mother and Sister Jeanne, they both looked so polished and clean. ", "Sally waved and blew a kiss, and her mother touched her gloved hand to her heart, then lifted it, the way you might release a bird into the air.", "\n\nSally looked around the train, felt the energy of its silent engines, poised to move. ", "People were settling themselves. ", "She did the same.", "\n\nThe windowsill was not grimy in the way of subway cars. ", "The upholstery was plush. ", "It was all very lovely. ", "Her mother had packed her a sandwich for dinner and a roll for breakfast. ", "A pear and a chocolate bar. ", "The Sisters had told her that if she waited until the tail end of the dinner hour, she could go to the dining car for a nice cup of tea. ", "She had three books with her: her missal, _The Story of a Soul_ by Saint Thérèse, and the novel the Tierney twins had given her as a going-away gift. ", "She looked out again. ", "Her mother and Sister Jeanne were still on the platform. ", "The engine gave up a tremendous sigh and then the trainman cried out. ", "The train began to move and the movement thrilled her. ", "Goodbye, goodbye, she cried silently, as if it were a prayer. ", "Touching her gloved hand to the window until the two women had passed out of its frame.", "\n\nA plump lady with two bulky shopping bags made her way down the aisle, bound, Sally could tell, for the seat beside her. ", "She watched the woman back into it, big rump and dark coat and short struggling arms. ", "Sally smiled up at her, weighing her disappointment at not having the seat to herself for the long ride against the promise of companionship. ", "She was thinking of the Thunderbolt in Coney Island, when the man in charge sometimes lifted a stray kid into your car. ", "The Tierney twins always resented this, but Sally preferred to feel even a stranger's shoulder against her own as the roller coaster began its climb.", "\n\nThe woman took some time getting herself arranged. ", "She wedged the shopping bags between her knees and the seat in front of them, sat back to observe the arrangement, and then leaned forward to fuss with them again. ", "Each time she moved, her clothes gave off the smell of artificial violets and, just behind it, cooking oil. ", "Then she sat back again. ", "She was breathing heavily, but with an odd rhythm—not the rhythm of a woman catching her breath after running for the train, but the quick, deep, agitated panting of an animal in distress.", "\n\nSally glanced at the brown bags, their handles tied together with dirty string, glimpsed the unconscious motion of the panting woman's bosom, and felt the most peculiar brush of panic—like the wing-stroke of a bat against her hair. ", "It was not, merely, a failure of courage at the start of her great adventure. ", "It was a throat-catching, spine-seizing fear, as startling as a dream's sudden misstep, that reflexive start, that abrupt intake of breath.", "\n\nShe turned to the window. ", "The train was making its way through the tunnel that would lead them out of the city, passing through flashing columns of darkness and light. ", "Of course, she had been riding subways all her life. ", "She was as accustomed to being underground as any New Yorker. ", "But that wing-stroke of terror—she actually reached up to touch her hat as if it had been somehow altered—reverberated. ", "It seemed to rattle through her bones. ", "Never before, gone underground, had she thought to wonder about the capacity of the steel beams and the concrete, or the genius of the sandhogs and the engineers, to keep earth and rock and water from coming down on their heads.", "\n\nShe had never before considered the fearful, foolish miracle of moving through this hollowed-out place.", "\n\nNever before equated its rushing darkness, its odor of soot and soil and steel, with the realm of the dead, the underside of bright cemeteries—the cemetery, for instance, where her father was, had always been, in sunshine and in rain, through all her bustling days as she went blithely down the subway steps or down into the convent basement . . .", "\n\nShe looked through the train window to the hollowed-out darkness.", "\n\nShe told herself the soul rose, of course, but until the last day, didn't the body pass its time here, in this dark underside of the bright world? ", "Why had she never thought of this before? ", "Her father's body waited down here, in stillness, looking much as it had when it last saw the sunlight: same clothing, same hair, the same patient, folded hands. ", "No shoes—someone at school had told her this—and, slowly, of course, flesh fallen away from bone.", "\n\nAnd then full daylight broke suddenly upon the train—explosive, thunderous. ", "She may have jumped.", "\n\nThe woman beside her, leaning into her shoulder, breathing on her neck, said, \"You headed for Chicago?\"", "\n\nSally turned to her. \"", "Yes,\" she said, grateful for the daylight now at the windows, the orange hue of the late afternoon. \"", "I am.\"", "\n\n\"Me, too,\" the woman said. ", "Her wide face was rough-skinned, well-powdered, scattered with coarse hairs. ", "She was younger than she had first appeared. ", "Something supple in her cheeks and chin, which gleamed softly with sweat, indicated this. ", "She wore bright lipstick. ", "There was lipstick on her small gray teeth as she smiled.", "\n\n\"Are you running away?\" ", "the woman asked.", "\n\n\"Oh no,\" Sally said. ", "It took an effort of will to meet the woman's small eyes, not only because her face was so close, but because Sally so wanted to turn once again to the window, to the lovely light of dusk. ", "They were no longer underground. ", "But she had been raised to be polite. ", "She had been trained by nuns to offer kindness to every stranger. \"", "I'm going to a convent,\" she said. \"", "My novitiate. ", "I'm going to be a nursing Sister.\"", "\n\nThe woman sat back a little, moving her short arms, kicking the bags at her feet. ", "Her hands, Sally noticed, were very small and plump, the short fingers all coming to little pale points. ", "The woman smiled broadly, with real delight. \"", "Mercy!\" ", "she said to the air above their heads, and laughed, a kind of rumbling, staccato laughter. \"", "Mercy me. ", "A nun.\" ", "Then she reached down again to adjust her shopping bags. \"", "Well,\" she said, \"I'm sure that's very nice for you, but I, for one, am running away.\"", "\n\nShe straightened up again. \"", "From my husband,\" she added. ", "There was something avian—was it pigeon or owl?—in the way she turned her head on her thick throat, moved chin and eyes in Sally's direction. \"", "He thinks I'm going to see my sister in Chicago, where I'm from, but I am going on through, all the way to California.\" ", "She nodded, smiling still. \"", "He'll never find me. ", "He'll never see my face again as long as he lives.\" ", "She raised her eyebrows, which were thick and wiry, all askew. \"", "What does a little nun have to say about that?\"", "\n\nSally hesitated. \"", "I'm very sorry to hear it,\" she said, imitating Sister Jeanne's sunny sympathy. \"", "I'll pray for you.\"", "\n\nThe woman smiled again. ", "She was growing younger and younger in Sally's estimation, growing closer to her own age, which seemed odd given how old she had first seemed. \"", "We were married for six years,\" the woman said. \"", "I can hardly believe it. ", "Six,\" she said again. \"", "Six years. ", "I was just a girl.\" ", "She laughed again, moving from side to side in her seat. ", "There was something sweetly unpleasant on her breath. ", "A decayed tooth, perhaps. \"", "And while I'm sure,\" the woman was saying, \"that a little baby nun would know nothing about these things, I can tell you with assurance that he had the tiniest penis known to man.\" ", "She held up her pale pinky. ", "The nail, the flesh itself, came to a point and was rimmed with grime. ", "And then the woman slipped the pinky into her mouth, pursed her lips around it. ", "She widened her eyes as if in surprise. ", "When she withdrew the finger, it was wet and stained at the base by her lipstick. ", "Then she put her hand, with the fingers curled into her palm, over her wide lap. ", "She wiggled the wet finger against the dark fabric of her skirt. \"", "Can you imagine,\" she said casually, \"a girl the size of me spending her life riding a thing the size of that?\"", "\n\nSally pulled her eyes away, her face burning. ", "The woman touched her with her elbow and nodded down, drawing her eyes again to the dark lap, the wet pinky moving spastically like some pale blind thing.", "\n\n\"Of course,\" the woman went on, closing her hand into a fist, \"a little nun would know nothing about any of this, but when you get to your convent, ask around. ", "Or ask your own mother when next you see her. ", "Is your mother still living?\"", "\n\nSally was shocked and embarrassed and confused enough to give a courteous reply. \"", "Yes, she is,\" she whispered.", "\n\n\"And your father?\" ", "The woman asked. \"", "Is he still with us?\"", "\n\nSally shook her head, once more averting her eyes. ", "There was a man reading a newspaper just across the aisle. ", "She thought he might have, briefly, glanced around it to see them. \"", "My father died before I was born,\" she said, even though, as untraveled as she was, her instinct told her to stop this conversation, to move to another seat, another train. ", "To call to the man across the aisle for rescue.", "\n\nThe woman laughed again, a deep slow chuckle, even though, Sally saw as she glanced at her once more, her chest was rising rapidly, up and down, with the odd pace of her breathing. \"", "I suppose a case could be made that a teeny weenie is better than none at all, as would seem is your poor mother's case.\"", "\n\nJust then, the conductor reached them, \"Good evening, ladies,\" and took their tickets. ", "Her companion said, \"Good evening, kind sir,\" leaning forward a bit as she reached for her ticket, which was wedged into a corner of one of her bags, and then bringing her head up too close to his belt buckle. ", "She looked at Sally as she handed her own ticket to the man and then shifted her gaze back to the trainman's blue pants, nodding, as if Sally should consider what was hidden under the gabardine.", "\n\nShe had an image of the woman's wriggling wet pinky, writhing in the darkness, and felt herself blush again. ", "She turned her face to the window.", "\n\n\"Did you ever read _The Teenie Weenies_?\" ", "the woman asked her in what suddenly seemed a pleasant, conversational voice. \"", "They were in the Sunday funnies? ", "Adorable little pixies, they were. ", "Little spools of thread for chairs and chestnut leaves or some such for clothes. ", "Did you ever see it?\"", "\n\nSally shook her head. \"", "No,\" she said.", "\n\n\"It's really quite charming,\" she went on. \"", "I'm a great reader of the Sunday funnies. ", "I love Orphan Annie, being orphaned myself. ", "Almost like you. ", "And that big Daddy Warbucks with his beautiful bald head. ", "I also love Li'l Abner. ", "Do you go to the pictures much?\"", "\n\n\"Sometimes,\" Sally said.", "\n\nThe woman turned her head, doubling her chins, and cast her eyes over the girl once more. \"", "You really want to go through life all alone, without a man to protect you?\"", "\n\nSally shrugged, smiled. ", "Instinct told her not to squander her belief on this dirty woman, but still she struggled with the impulse to say, Betrothed to Our Lord.", "\n\nThe woman was studying her. \"", "But you're just a baby,\" she said without waiting for a reply. \"", "You'll see what I mean soon enough.\"", "\n\nThen the woman reached up to unpin her hat, getting further settled. ", "She fluffed her hair. \"", "I'm going to go bleach-blonde when I get to California,\" she went on. \"", "I think it will suit me. ", "Do you think it will suit me?\"", "\n\nSally smiled politely—it was the response she'd been trained for—and said, \"I think so,\" wanting once more to turn away from the woman, toward the window, both to see where they were going and to put this conversation to an end. ", "But she was uncertain about how this was done.", "\n\n\"Of course, the muff gives it away,\" the woman said. ", "And again she touched her elbow to Sally's side. ", "Sally, still smiling, shook her head. ", "Her mother had once found a white muff made of rabbit fur in the donation basket, but Sally had refused it—she was old enough by then, maybe ten or eleven. ", "She had, by then, become aware of the haughty eyes of other girls, on the street, even in church, when they saw her wearing their own outgrown clothes.", "\n\nBut the woman was nodding toward her lap, speaking to her as if she had suddenly lost her hearing. \"", "A muff,\" she said. \"", "Don't you get it? ", "Down below. ", "I'm not about to bleach that.\" ", "And she laughed into the air, once more moving her bottom from side to side to get more comfortable in her seat. ", "Her arms were too short for her body. ", "She crossed and then uncrossed them over her broad chest. \"", "The way I figure it,\" she went on, \"by the time you've got a man eye-to-eye with your muff, he's not worried if you're a natural blonde or not.\"", "\n\nSally shook her head, uncomprehending, and the woman laughed again, panting still. \"", "Oh, you baby,\" she said, all-knowing. \"", "You'll find out one of these days.\"", "\n\nSally turned her burning face to the widow. ", "The train was moving through the flat outskirts of the city. ", "There were still tenements and long avenues in the distance, lights coming on here and there, although the sun had yet to set. ", "She was vaguely aware of the woman leaning forward again to arrange her bags, pushing them out into the aisle, drawing them back in again, over the high insteps of her small feet.", "\n\nAnd then her voice was at Sally's shoulder again. ", "Hot puffs of words on her neck. \"", "One time,\" the woman said, \"I was riding the train from Chicago and a man came down the aisle selling nuts. ", "Have you heard this one?\"", "\n\nSally shook her head—misunderstanding once again.", "\n\n\"He was selling nuts, yelling out, Peanuts, roasted almonds, cashews. ", "So I said to him, 'Do you have any pecans, kind sir?' ", "And he said, 'Pee cans? ", "Back of the train, lady.'\"", "\n\nShe laughed. ", "Her exhalations gave a taste to the air between them. \"", "Do you get it? ", "Pee cans. ", "Toilets.\" ", "She waved her little hand. \"", "What I'm saying is, I'm going to go find the pee can,\" and Sally, the habit of politeness so well engrained, smiled and nodded, as if their conversation thus far had been refined. ", "Suddenly the woman gave her a long, penetrating look, not kind. \"", "Keep your hands to yourself while I'm gone,\" the woman said. \"", "Lay off my stuff.\"", "\n\nShe had some trouble maneuvering out of the seat. ", "Once again, the way she moved—shuffling, heavy-bottomed—gave the impression of great age. ", "As she moved away, the man across the aisle lowered his newspaper and looked at Sally with a kind of amused sympathy. ", "He was an older man. ", "Or maybe a young man made old by the vague shadow of his hat brim over his eyes. ", "Her face flushed again to think he had overheard.", "\n\nA small child appeared in the aisle beside her. ", "Or small-bodied, thin-limbed, but with a large and dirty face. ", "His head was unevenly shaven, down to white scalp in some places, prickly with dark hairs in others, which made his skull seem battered and misshapen. ", "There were scabs on his scalp and on his chin and nose. ", "He stood beside her for a moment, a bit wobbly because of the movement of the train. ", "And then he put his hand on the armrest of the empty seat and smiled, his crooked teeth nearly green. ", "She smiled at him and said hello. ", "He said hello. \"", "Are you going to Chicago?\" ", "she asked. ", "He shrugged. ", "There was a fine white crust around his nose. \"", "Would you like a piece of chocolate?\" ", "she asked him.", "\n\nHe raised his pale eyebrows. ", "She noticed another maroon scab along one of them. ", "It seemed to crack dryly as the skin moved. ", "She reached into her bag for the dinner her mother had made, and just as she put her hand on the chocolate bar, another hand, reaching upside down and backward from the seat in front of her, clawed the air until it touched the boy's arm, then his collar, and then pulled him out of sight, nearly off his feet. ", "She heard a woman's voice say \"Sit,\" and the crack of a hand against flesh. ", "No sound from the child, but the man across the aisle again looked up from his paper, observed what she couldn't see, and then again looked at her and shook his head sorrowfully.", "\n\nThe dirty woman was some time in coming back, and when she did return, and once more maneuvered herself rear-first into her seat, the unwashed odor beneath her violets and cooking oil was vivid.", "\n\nSally had taken out her missal by then—much as she would have preferred opening the novel, she feared what conversation it might lead to—and the woman leaned over elaborately to see what she was reading. ", "Then she sat back again.", "\n\n\"Ever had a boyfriend?\" ", "she asked.", "\n\nSally turned a page and nodded with a small, apologetic shrug, as if she were too absorbed in her prayers to speak aloud. ", "But already she was rehearsing how, if the woman pressed her, she would use the name and the personality of Patrick Tierney, whom she had known all her life, to create an image of an adoring boyfriend, finally refused. ", "In the story she would have told the woman, had she pressed her, her imaginary Patrick Tierney was better looking than the real one, something like tall Charlie with his blue eyes, and with a flourish to his background (his father a soldier, not a doorman) and his profession (a medical student, not a laborer). ", "She would tell the crude woman that this Patrick Tierney held back his tears—stoically—when he saw her off at the train station today, rather than, as was the actual case, merely saying last night when he came over with his two sisters to tell her goodbye, \"You'll be back, I guarantee it. ", "That's not the life for you.\"", "\n\nBut the dirty woman didn't press her. ", "She waved her hand in the air as if she knew the girl's nod was a lie and then leaned forward to rummage through her bags. ", "She took a sandwich from one of them—now there was the smell of liverwurst and onion—and ate hungrily, but silently, panting as she did.", "\n\nAll over the car, as the world outside lost light, people were bringing out food, odors of canned meat and cheese and old apples. ", "Cigarette smoke gathered like mist over the hats and the heads of the passengers. ", "A shouting argument erupted at one end of the car. ", "She saw the conductor stop in the aisle to wave a finger at the culprits. ", "The bald-headed child walked by again as if in a trance, balancing himself between the seats. ", "Some minutes later, when the train lurched, he let out a wail that could be heard even over the noise of the tracks and the engine. ", "His mother, whom Sally could only see from behind, a crushed cloth hat over a tangle of thin and graying hair, was slumped against the window. ", "She sprang from her seat and raced down the aisle in a stooped, hunchbacked way. ", "A second later, she was dragging the boy through the aisle. ", "He was wailing. ", "He had his hands over his eyes, his little mouth a moldy circle. ", "The mother threw him into his seat and dove after him. ", "Again there was the crack of her hand against his flesh, but to clear effect this time: the boy's outraged cries reached another register.", "\n\nSomeone on the train said, \"Shut up.\"", "\n\nThe woman beside her said, \"Serves them right.\"", "\n\nThe man on the aisle folded up his paper, neatly, and tucked it under his arm. ", "Then he pulled his hat down over his eyes.", "\n\nWhen Sally finally got the courage to get out of her seat and use the toilets, the floor there was wet. ", "The soles of her shoes were tacky when she returned to her seat. ", "When she went to the dining car—at the tail end of the dinner service, as the Sisters had advised—she was made to wait in the swaying corridor, and while she did so, a man, smelling of alcohol, passed by her too closely and rubbed his chest against hers, breathing into her face. ", "A girl her own age—she was certain this one was her own age—was already at the table where they sat her, finishing her dinner. ", "She wore a smart dark suit and a hat with a veil, and at first Sally feared she might be a rich girl, the daughter of a prosperous father, the kind who would snort through her nose, even in church, when she looked Sally's outfit up and down. ", "But it took no more than a minute for Sally to see the shine on the fabric of the girl's jacket, the pale threads at the edge of her cuffs. ", "Sally knew secondhand when she saw it. ", "There was a tear in the veil as well. ", "The girl had tried to hide it with a hat pin, but the material had come undone and now stood up stiffly, showing the hole to anyone who looked—as if the hat itself disdained this unworthy owner. ", "The girl's outfit, Sally recognized, was all effort.", "\n\nWhen Sally ordered her tea, the girl asked for the same, and a bowl of vanilla ice cream.", "\n\nThen she smiled warmly across the small table. \"", "Going to Chicago?\" ", "she asked, and Sally only nodded warily. ", "She had learned the first lesson of her first journey from home. ", "But the girl barely registered the reply. ", "She began talking, leaning into the table as she did, as if without it between them she would crawl, talking, into Sally's lap. ", "There was something endearing about the tumble of her words. ", "She was from the Bronx, she said, going to Chicago to meet her husband, who had, at last, found work there. ", "He hadn't had work, she said, for two years. ", "As long as they'd been married.", "\n\nHere she straightened up to allow the waiter to set down their tea and her silver dish of ice cream. ", "She opened the purse on her lap and began to rummage through it, talking all the while.", "\n\nShe missed him so much, she said. ", "Missed him like crazy. \"", "It's like an itch,\" she said.", "\n\nMrs. Tierney sometimes said, \"An itch where I've never had a bite,\" which always got her mother laughing.", "\n\n\"I'm just going crazy with it,\" the girl said. \"", "I'm so lonesome for him.\"", "\n\nTalking, she extracted a small perfume bottle from her purse and tipped a little of the clear perfume into her hot tea. ", "Without pause, she reached across the table and poured some into Sally's cup as well.", "\n\nAstonished, Sally put out her hand.", "\n\n\"It's good for you,\" the girl said, merely as an aside to her tale.", "\n\nWhen they were first married, she said, they lived with her mother in the Bronx, but they were always fighting because he couldn't find a job. ", "So he left for Chicago. (", "The girl licked the ice cream from the back of her spoon.) ", "She didn't even know where he'd been living. ", "Her mother said he must live on the street. ", "She wrote to ask him if he lived on the street, but he never answered. ", "For six months, all she had was two letters that said, No luck, still looking. ", "She said again, \"I was going crazy, missing him so much.\"", "\n\nShe sipped her tea and pursed her lips. \"", "It's good,\" she said, and nodded that Sally should try hers. \"", "Better than cream and sugar.\"", "\n\nReluctantly, Sally lifted the warm cup. ", "She was expecting the taste of lavender or rose water—the taste of perfume—but what hit her tongue was hot and clenching; it seemed to sear, simultaneously, her nose and her throat. ", "Her eyes watered. ", "She coughed.", "\n\nThe girl laughed.", "\n\n\"This is whiskey,\" Sally said. ", "She knew something of the taste of it—given to her by her mother, on a spoon, when she had a cold. ", "Or rubbed on her gums for a toothache.", "\n\nThe girl agreed. \"", "Sure it is,\" she said. \"", "It's good for you,\" and then she reached for the sugar cubes on the table between them. ", "She tossed two of them into Sally's tea. \"", "Now try it,\" she said, and Sally did. ", "Again the watering of her eyes and the impulse to cough, although the sweetness helped.", "\n\nThe girl said, \"So, as I was saying.\" ", "Finally, her husband wrote to tell her he had work—he didn't even say where—and a room. ", "The stationery he used was from a Chicago hotel, it had the name and address printed right on it. ", "That was good enough for her. ", "She got the letter only yesterday—but, she said, she was never one to let grass grow under her feet. ", "She was going crazy, missing him so much.", "\n\nThrough her tea-induced tears, Sally saw the girl smiling at her. ", "She had a pleasant, square face. ", "Sally thought of the stationery Mrs. Tierney used for the notes she sent to school when one of the Tierney children was sick—lovely white stationery marked with the address of the St. Francis Hotel. \"", "Purloined paper,\" Patrick Tierney called it, teaching Sally and his sisters the meaning of the word.", "\n\nSally took a third sip. ", "The taste was the taste of her mother's warm finger, dipped into a capful of whiskey and rubbed against her gums.", "\n\nThe girl said she just walked out of her mother's apartment this morning, tried to pawn her wedding ring (she held up her ringless hand), which turned out to be gold-plated, not gold. ", "She shrugged. ", "She went back to her mother's place and looked around. ", "Her mother had a silver tea service they never used. ", "Never. ", "Not once. ", "Just sitting there. ", "She took the tea service back to the pawnshop and got enough to buy her ticket. ", "And here she was.", "\n\n\"I bet you think I'm something awful to steal from my own mother,\" she said from behind her teacup. \"", "But I know I'm going to send the money back as soon as I can. ", "And I swear to you on a stack of Bibles, my mother never once used that teapot.\"", "\n\n\"I don't think you're awful,\" Sally said softly.", "\n\nThe girl was saying she had a very nice sleeping berth, and asked if Sally had a sleeping berth, clucking her tongue sympathetically when she said no. ", "She was a pretty girl with a small face, pale brown hair, a tiny mouth that hung open when she wasn't talking. ", "She seemed puzzled when Sally told her she was on her way to the novitiate, and then shrugged when Sally explained this meant she was going to be a nun.", "\n\n\"I'm not Catholic,\" the girl said, suddenly dull-eyed, without interest.", "\n\nWhen the white-jacketed waiter brought the checks, the girl reached across the table and took Sally's wrist. ", "She began to speak urgently across the small space. ", "Once more, Sally wondered if she had misjudged a stranger's age. \"", "Help me out,\" the girl said. \"", "I haven't got any more money. ", "Now they'll throw me off the train.\"", "\n\nSally had the five dollars in her wallet, the fifty more pinned to the lining of her purse, meant to be given to the Sisters on her arrival. ", "She smiled as Sister Jeanne would have smiled and put two bills on the little silver tray to cover the girl's dinner.", "\n\nBut then the girl took her wrist once again.", "\n\n\"If you've got a little more,\" she said, and paused, and then said in a rush, \"What I mean is, if you could lend me a little more. ", "If you've got it.\" ", "Her grip tightened. \"", "See, I don't know how I'll get to the hotel. ", "Maybe there's a subway or something. ", "I don't know. ", "And if my husband isn't there, I don't know what I'll do. ", "Where I'll stay. ", "What if I can't find him? ", "What will happen to me? ", "I'll be out on the street.\"", "\n\nThe girl pressed her fingertips into Sally's flesh. ", "Her nails were bitten.", "\n\n\"I'm sure your husband will be there,\" Sally said, trying to soothe her. ", "It was the voice she had used with Mrs. Costello. \"", "He sent you the letter.\" ", "But she was thinking of Mrs. Tierney's purloined stationery.", "\n\nThe girl leaned even farther over the small table, pressing her breasts against the narrow wood. ", "The ripped veil of her hat seemed to rise up, to reach out imploringly, a beggar's thin hand. \"", "But what will I do if he's not?\" ", "she said. \"", "Can't you just lend me something? ", "A little more?\" ", "She eyed Sally's purse. \"", "I swear I'll pay you right back,\" cooing it. ", "And now her voice grew to a whine. \"", "What will I do out on the street?\"", "\n\nSally recognized, reluctantly, what was happening here: her vocation was being tested. ", "First the dirty woman with her vulgar talk, and now this girl. ", "It hardly seemed fair that God would measure her worth so soon. ", "She thought of Sister Lucy, who had wanted a contemplative's life. ", "Who did not refuse.", "\n\nUnhappily, Sally said, \"All right.\" ", "She extricated her hand from the girl's clammy grip. ", "She opened her pocketbook and reached into the slim tear behind the satin lining, felt for the safety pin, aware of the girl studying her all the while. ", "She knew she should have the grace to give the girl all she had, as Christ would have done. ", "Certainly as Sister Jeanne would have done. ", "She knew the Sisters in Chicago would applaud her generosity. ", "But she knew, too, that she didn't want to. ", "Didn't want to give up what her mother had so carefully saved. ", "Didn't want—even more fiercely—to be mocked by another dirty stranger. ", "She slid out two ten dollar bills and passed them across the table, fighting her own regret even as she gave them up. \"", "That's everything I have,\" she said piously. ", "Stubbornly. \"", "That's all I own.\"", "\n\nThe girl reached for the money. \"", "Write down your address,\" she said, and took the receipt from the silver plate, pushing it toward her. \"", "I'll be there tomorrow to pay you back.\"", "\n\nShe was tucking the bills into her own purse when she suddenly looked across the table. \"", "I didn't know nuns were allowed to have money,\" she said. ", "It seemed a reprimand.", "\n\nAs Sally was leaving the car, headed in the opposite direction from the Bronx girl, the white-jacketed waiter took her arm. \"", "Pardon me, miss,\" he said. \"", "That lady a friend of yours?\"", "\n\nAnd Sally, somewhat breathlessly, as if he had caught her in a lie, said, \"Yes.\"", "\n\nThe man shook his head. ", "He was a bald black man with large and sympathetic eyes. \"", "I just hope she was no trouble to you,\" he said kindly. \"", "That's all.\"", "\n\nSally said, \"Thank you.\" ", "She was about to walk on when she added, abruptly, as if to return his kindness, \"My father worked on a train, too. ", "The Brooklyn Rapid Transit.\" ", "She was surprised to find her tongue had grown thick.", "\n\nThe man smiled and nodded. ", "This might have been something he already knew. \"", "Is your father with you tonight?\" ", "he asked.", "\n\nAnd she said, \"Oh yes,\" the two words running together sloppily. ", "She indicated the open corridor. \"", "He's just back there,\" she said. ", "And imagined him briefly, a man with a fedora pulled over his eyes.", "\n\nThe porter said, \"You both have a nice evening, then.\"", "\n\nWhen she returned to her seat, her companion was once again chuckling inside her panting breath—no telling at what.", "\n\nOutside, there were only small bits of light, moth holes, as she thought of them, in the heavy darkness. ", "The taste of the sweet tea, the aftermath of the alcohol, lingered at the back of her throat, made her eyes ache. ", "She leaned her head against the window.", "\n\nThe stations they pulled into were a relief at first, golden and bustling, but as the hour grew late and she woke from a shallow sleep to see them, they offered only a yellowed, nightmare tableau of weary shadows: a lonely stationmaster lifting a heavy arm, a single passenger with a suitcase and an abandoned air, a newspaper blown against a wall. ", "Weary shadows that were quickly lost again as the train moved on, into the cavernous night.", "\n\nHer father was a trainman on the BRT.", "\n\nAll her life, as she moved over bright sidewalks and green grass, he had been in his coffin, the narrowest of corridors—of lightless tunnels meant to keep out rock and stone and damp earth. ", "Why had she never thought of this before? ", "Why had she never pictured him there as she blithely went up and down the subway stairs, rode nonchalantly through the darkness. ", "A trainman on the BRT, now long returned to the place where he had plied his trade: the damp underground, the dirt and carved stone, the brittle dark.", "\n\nAt one point, she woke to see the little boy standing in the aisle again. ", "Her companion slept lifelessly beside her. ", "He swayed with the movement of the train. ", "Even in the dimmed light, now thick with smoke, she could see the goose egg on his bald skull. ", "As he shifted with the train's shuddering, she could see a line of dried blood on his cheek just below it. ", "She had only half her chocolate bar left, but she found it in her purse and handed it across the bulk of her seatmate to the child. ", "He took it from her and then, wraithlike, walked on. ", "His mother's head was slumped into the window.", "\n\nShe was going to give her life to others, in the name of the crucified Christ and His loving mother. ", "She was going to join the Little Nursing Sisters of the Sick Poor, Congregation of Mary Before the Cross, _Stabat Mater_ , which Sister Jeanne thought the most beautiful name of all the orders. ", "Because it reminded us all, Sister Jeanne said, that love stood before brutality in that moment on Golgotha and love was triumphant. ", "Love applied to suffering, as Sister Illuminata put it: like a clean cloth to a seeping wound.", "\n\nSally had understood the image in the basement laundry of the convent, when she watched Sister Illuminata put a hot iron to the nuns' clean clothes—perfume of starch and of soap, of the heavy linen itself, dried in the courtyard's sun. ", "A clean cloth—immaculate and pure—to place against mankind's wounds. ", "She had felt, the fragrant steam rising, the joy of it, the rightness of it. ", "No help in putting a soiled, sullied thing to what was itself debased and infected. ", "One kept oneself, one made oneself, pure—dressed in these immaculate clothes, moved about these simple rooms, prayed the Hours, spoke softly, kept still one's idle hands and kept gentle one's thoughts, to offer relief to the wretched world, to assuage the seething wound, the lesion, _laesio,_ of human suffering. ", "The suffering that all things mortal were heir to, Sister Illuminata had said.", "\n\nIn her lovely habit, she wanted to be that pure antidote to human pain.", "\n\nBut she wanted, too, in some equal, more furious way, not to be mocked for it; not to be fooled. ", "Sister Lucy had told her, Don't think you can end all suffering with your charms.", "\n\nThe next time she got up to use the toilet she had to climb over the solid bulk of her sleeping companion. ", "As Sally awkwardly crossed her lap, trying to step over the brown bags at her feet, she felt the woman grab at her hip and then poke a dirty finger at the seat of her skirt. ", "Sally cried out, nearly tumbled, but swiftly caught her breath as she gathered herself in the aisle. ", "She looked back at the woman, who had once more closed her eyes. ", "The man on the aisle reached out to steady her, and briefly, although she didn't need to, she gripped his hand. ", "Warm and broad and very strong. ", "She said, \"Thank you.\"", "\n\nIn the toilet, the odor of someone's bowel movement was overwhelming. ", "She stumbled out, walked to the thin corridor between the cars to get some air. ", "Out here, the rattling echo of the steel over the tracks seemed to bounce off the darkness that surrounded them, as if the darkness itself were made of black stone. ", "As if they had once more gone underground.", "\n\nShe saw a man approaching from the yellow light of the next car, a sleeping car—she could see a porter moving behind him. ", "The porter was buttoning down the curtains on each berth, securing whoever was inside for the night. ", "The girl from the Bronx, asleep on the money Sally's mother had labored to earn. ", "The man approaching seemed to smile at her, and, afraid, she stepped back inside just ahead of him. ", "He followed her, even reached over her head to hold the door, pressing—was he pressing?—himself into her back. ", "He went into the toilet and she made her way down the aisle. ", "A card game was going on among four smoking men. ", "They looked up indifferently as she passed. ", "One of the men held the black stump of a cigar between his fingers; the end of it, blacker still, was wet. ", "Everything reeked. ", "Of smoke and sweat and the human gas seeping from these mounds of flesh. ", "She put the back of her hand to her nose and her own flesh reeked.", "\n\nUnsteadily, she walked past her seat, to the end of the car—\"pee cans,\" the dirty woman had said, vulgar—and then she turned around and walked back again. ", "Here in the dim and smoky light were, for her consideration, a sampling of \"the others\" she was giving her life to: vulgar, unkempt, ungrateful. ", "Pale, sleeping faces with gaping, distorted mouths, sprawled limbs, a hollow-eyed soldier looking out into the night, a khaki rucksack clutched to his chest, a yellow-skinned old man folded into himself, gazing forward with a murderous look. ", "A young woman in a jaunty hat, chewing gum ferociously, reading a magazine, picking her nose and then flicking her fingertips into the aisle.", "\n\nShe passed the seat in front of hers, where the little bald boy now slept pressed up against his mother's back, which was turned to him. ", "His hands were between his knees, as if for warmth. ", "He looked like the bums who slept beneath the elevated, like a little hobo curled against the concrete wall of a warehouse. ", "There was a dirty, bloodstained handkerchief on the floor at his feet.", "\n\n\"Excuse me,\" she said to her companion when she returned to her seat. ", "The woman was sprawled and did not move. ", "The man on the aisle was watching, smiling still. \"", "Excuse me,\" she said again, and now the woman merely turned her face away with a small snort and bubble. ", "The man across the way said, helpfully, \"You might have to poke her.\" ", "She looked at him straight on for the first time. ", "An older man with a five o'clock shadow, balding, almost handsome, some missing teeth in the side of his smile. ", "A look of weariness about him, too, of course, at this hour, but a kind eye. ", "Did she really want to go through life without a man to protect her? ", "He reached across the aisle to touch the woman's thick elbow. \"", "Madam,\" he said. ", "And louder, \"Madam.\" ", "Again someone in the car called, \"Pipe down.\"", "\n\nSally, weary herself, screwed up her courage and shouted, \"Excuse me!\" ", "She reached out—even to her own eye her movements had grown weird, as if weirdly weighted—and pressed a finger into the woman's shoulder. ", "The flesh beneath her coat seemed barely to give. ", "Her wide thighs, straining against her dark skirt, twitched a bit, but continued to block the way. ", "The man on the aisle said, \"Madam,\" once more.", "\n\nStruggling to keep her balance in the aisle, Sally looked at her empty seat on the other side of this fleshy obstacle. ", "She had never in her life so desired a single destination. ", "She wanted only to curl into it, turn her face to the cool window. ", "She wanted only to be left alone. ", "Suddenly, in a kind of desperation, she reached down and slid the shopping bags off the woman's feet and into the aisle. ", "One of them toppled, an orange and a gold compact and a bit of bright silk, a scarf or a slip or a nightgown, spilling from the top, causing, at last, the woman to stir. ", "She reached out her spiked hands in the startled way of sleepers, and in an instant of fear and rage, Sally swung her fist into the woman's palm, made contact with it, and then swung again, striking this time the inside of her fat wrist, touching the bone beneath the ringed flesh. ", "And then, it seemed all the same, continuous motion, although in truth it was choppy and abrupt, like pounding laundry, she swung again—the woman tried but failed to raise her elbow in defense. ", "Sally felt the hard surface of the woman's dry teeth against her knuckles, felt, too, the tacky lipstick and the humid breath.", "\n\n\"Keep your damn hands to yourself,\" Sally said, stepping over the woman's feet, kicking the greasy bags with her heel. \"", "Stay away from me.\"", "\n\nShe cleared the woman's lap and drove herself into the seat, her heart pounding. ", "Turned her face to the window.", "\n\nThere was an astonished pause, and then the woman shouted, \"Mercy!\" ", "Panting more forcefully. ", "Or not panting now, but sobbing. ", "Sally glanced briefly over her shoulder. ", "The woman, her awful fingers pressed delicately against her mouth, was now leaning out into the aisle to retrieve the bag. ", "The man across the way had bent down to help her, and the little bald boy appeared, handing her the escaped orange and the thick gold compact. ", "An act of betrayal on both their parts, Sally thought. \"", "Thank you, sweetheart,\" she heard the woman say as she wept. \"", "Thank you, kind sir.\" ", "She told them, \"You'd think butter wouldn't melt in her mouth.\"", "\n\nSally turned her face to the window. ", "Once again, she felt the woman's breath on her neck. \"", "A fine Sister you'll make,\" she hissed.", "\n\nSally raised her shoulder against the sound, against the woman's breath. ", "She was now the one who was panting. ", "Her anger a clenched fist in her chest. ", "And yet there was pride, too. ", "She had, after all, spoken up.", "\n\n\"You're a devil,\" the woman said into her ear. ", "Without turning to face her, Sally bared her teeth at her own reflection and whispered, \"You are.\"", "\n\nThe windowsill of the train was now as sooty as any subway's.", "\n\nThe smell of soot, in fact, was lofting through the car. ", "She put her forehead to the glass to see if there was a refinery outside, a house fire, a blazing garbage dump. ", "Fire and brimstone. ", "It seemed the right smell for this hellish train, this terrible journey that could not have taken her farther from the convent's clean laundry and the pretty joy she had felt just this afternoon about the consecrated life she was called to.", "\n\nThere was only darkness beyond the train window, her own vague reflection passing over it. ", "She wondered how many miles they had gone and, with the thought, felt the flood of tears she had not realized she'd been keeping at bay, had been keeping at bay since she last glimpsed Sister Jeanne and her mother through this very glass. ", "She put her fingertips to the window. ", "Her mother and Sister Jeanne had once stood framed within it. ", "The tears came, bitter and unrelenting. ", "Life a bleak prospect to a motherless child.", "\n\nAt her back, she heard the dirty woman say, \"Serves you right.\"", "\n\nIt was three in the morning.", "\n\nBy the time the train came into the station in Chicago, she had done her calculations: she had the money in her wallet, and the remaining bills pinned to the lining of her handbag. ", "She also had a dollar in each shoe—following the Tierney twins' advice. ", "She would get herself a sleeping car for the journey home.", "\n\nThere was the scent of morning air inside the beautiful station—the familiar scent of early-morning city air that made her feel for just a moment that she had not arrived but returned. ", "There was something lovely in the bright beams that poured in from the skylights, touching down here and there on the wide floor.", "\n\nThere was the bustle of many busy people, the trailing presence of the dirty woman, whose breath she could still taste. ", "She saw the two nuns who were there to meet her, their clean and simple forms, arms folded, idle hands tucked into their sleeves. ", "One was young, one older. ", "They both smiled as she approached. ", "Their skin, after the heavy powder of the woman on the train, looked pure, newly formed, despite the peach fuzz and wrinkles on one and the scattering of blemishes on the other. ", "She recognized the smell of sunlight and starch on their habits. ", "She recognized the offer of friendship in the younger one's shy brown eyes.", "\n\nShe would love the companionship of nuns for the rest of her life.", "\n\n\"Here you are,\" the old one said, holding out her immaculate hands, welcoming her. \"", "We're so happy you've thought to join us.\"", "\n\nSally put her suitcase down. ", "She might have seen the Bronx girl walking quickly past from the corner of her eye. \"", "The truth is,\" she said, \"I've thought better of it.\"", "\nStabat Mater\n\nThere were no nursing sisters on the street when she walked up from the subway. ", "No Patrick Tierney, either, to call out, \"What did I tell you?\" ", "when he saw her lugging herself home. ", "That was lucky. ", "She had slept only briefly on the train coming back—buttoned into a lower bunk, but no less terrified going east than she had been going west. ", "The torment on the trip out had been those awful people. ", "The torment of the trip home was the utter loneliness of that dark, narrow berth.", "\n\nThe movement of the train was with her still, in her back and under her feet, as she walked down her own block with her suitcase and then up the familiar steps. ", "There was no one in the entry. ", "No Mrs. Gertler perched in her window on the parlor floor. ", "That was lucky, too. ", "She climbed the stairs. ", "It was early afternoon, but her lack of sleep, her unplanned return, made the hour of the day seem uncertain and strange. ", "Just forty-eight hours ago, she had said her goodbyes to this place, folded into her view of herself the romantic notion that many years would pass before she saw it again. ", "It would not take much imagination, tired as she was, to believe that time had, indeed, intervened and she was returning like some Odysseus, much older and much changed.", "\n\nLife goes by in the blink of an eye. ", "It would not take any imagination to convince herself that it already had.", "\n\nHer mother's voice reached her through the open transom above the apartment door. ", "Her mother's laughter. ", "Distinct and familiar and yet, as well, indistinguishable from the man's voice that ran just beneath it. ", "A man's voice low but rising, rising and falling in a kind of enumerating rhythm, the rhythm of a tale being told, a joke or a story. ", "Inside the apartment, a man was telling her mother a story and her mother was laughing, laughing here and there. ", "There was always something enviable about her mother's laugh. ", "Ever since she was a child, Sally flew to it. ", "Put up her arms, put her hands to her mother's broad cheeks to say, What? ", "What?", "\n\nShe thought of Sister Jeanne, raising her face to the sound of it, as if to a warm sun.", "\n\nSally eased open the door. ", "Placed her suitcase beside the couch. ", "From the living room she could see that the man had drawn a dining chair into the kitchen doorway. ", "He was sitting in it crookedly, his back to her. ", "He was in shirtsleeves and had his hands in his pant pockets. ", "Her mother was in the kitchen just beyond him, at the stove, but in easy reach. ", "She was frying something in a pan—the spit and sizzle of ham. ", "She was laughing. ", "He was talking. ", "Never in Sally's experience had a man in shirtsleeves sat in the kitchen doorway in this way, talking to her mother in this way. ", "Not as a visitor would, but as one who was utterly at home in, utterly familiar with, these few rooms. ", "She moved closer, through the living room, to the long sideboard.", "\n\nFrom where she paused she could see him better. ", "His hair was black and touched with gray, thick over his neck but thin at the top. ", "His shoulders in his striped shirt were wide. ", "He was collarless. ", "In the glass of the kitchen's single window she could see a vague reflection of his face: broad forehead, pale, and dark eyes made shadowy by the reflection. \" '", "Are you telling me?'\" ", "he was saying, and Sally recognized the brogue. \" '", "Are you telling me,' I asked him, 'that after all this time . . .'\"", "\n\n\"After all that time,\" her mother said without turning, laughing with him, her hips moving, the hem of her long skirt moving, moving with her laughter, and her voice—what was it about her voice that was so new?—bright, easy, warm. ", "Both of their voices so familiar in the exchange. ", "When had she ever heard such a thing in these rooms? ", "When had she ever seen such a thing?", "\n\nTelling us later, she said, \"I had to rub my eyes.\"", "\n\nAnd then she saw, with an intake of breath, a cry of surprise, that the man's thin white feet were bare on the linoleum floor.", "\n\n\"Glory be to God,\" her mother said, and the man, turning, sat up in his chair. ", "Not Jim at all, not her father returned to them, to her, returned to life in the interval of her departure, but Mr. Costello, the milkman, struggling to stand now, politely, long bare feet and all.", "\n\nIn the bedroom, the sheets and the coverlet were folded down. ", "There was the smell of cigarette smoke in the air, the smell of flesh, some paler, warmer version of the human air of the train. ", "The man's worn jacket was draped over a chair. ", "His empty shoes placed side by side at the foot of the bed. ", "Her mother followed her there and closed the door behind her.", "\n\n\"You're back,\" she said. ", "Her hair was loose. ", "Her cheeks flushed red. ", "She had grown younger in Sally's short time away. \"", "What's happened? ", "You frightened the life out of me.\" ", "She paused, and together, mother and daughter took in the tumbled room, the counterpane, the white coat, the man's two empty shoes at the foot of the bed.", "\n\n\"You're back,\" her mother said again, but this time as if she understood it plainly.", "\n\nSally took in the room, what had been her room, her own bed.", "\n\nShe turned to her mother. ", "She felt the sensation of a plunge, with not even a stranger's shoulder beside her.", "\n\n\"And where will you go?\" ", "her mother asked her.", "\n\nWhen the two women returned to the living room, Mr. Costello—in his bare feet—was standing undecided by the front door with his head bowed, like a man waiting for an elevator. ", "Shyly, he looked up at her mother, and then, as they passed him, he slipped into the bedroom.", "\n\nHer mother told her to sit at the table. ", "Sally noticed that the dining room chair had been neatly returned to its place. ", "Moments later, her mother brought two plates with the ham and the eggs. ", "She sat down with her daughter. ", "Mr. Costello appeared in his shoes and his white coat and his hair combed down and his cap in his hands. ", "He said, \"I'll be going, then,\" politely, and her mother only looked up briefly—and the aff ction in her eyes was both brand-new and immediately familiar, a reminder of something Sally had always known: the strength of her mother's capacity to love, the assurance of it.", "\n\n\"Goodbye, dear,\" her mother said.", "\n\nThey ate in silence. ", "All was tasteless in her mouth. ", "She felt again the movement of the train beneath her. ", "If she closed her eyes, she knew, she could make herself believe she was still on board, in the suffocating darkness, looking out to this dancing light—this room, this day, her mother's sure hands, her living presence, her happiness—looking out at it all with what might have been her father's own eyes: envious, lonesome, buried, bereft.", "\nThe Substitute\n\nMrs. Tierney said, \"Take Patrick, then. ", "He's got his name.\"", "\n\nMr. Tierney said, \"I will.\"", "\n\nIt was the end of the argument. ", "They were both red-faced. ", "Both licked the spittle of shouted words from their lips, satisfied. ", "His parents' arguments, our father said, erupted suddenly, like a street fight, and then, just as rapidly, concluded. ", "Peace descended. ", "Something like happiness.", "\n\nTheir six children came to understand that a certain satisfaction might be found in setting a beloved's blood boiling.", "\n\nA telegram had arrived from Poughkeepsie: Mr. Tierney's father was dead. ", "Mr. Tierney said he must go to the funeral, and Mrs. Tierney asked if he was going to do her the indignity of expecting her to accompany him. ", "He said no, but he would take the children. ", "She said she would not have them missing school for a man they'd never met. ", "He said he would take only the boys, then. ", "She said Michael's job was already hanging by a thread.", "\n\n\"I won't stay long,\" Mr. Tierney said.", "\n\nMrs. Tierney said, \"You're a fool to go at all.\"", "\n\n\"I'm his only child,\" Mr. Tierney said.", "\n\n\"Didn't he know that himself?\" ", "Mrs. Tierney replied.", "\n\n\"I won't be plagued by his ghost,\" Mr. Tierney shouted.", "\n\n\"He had no use for you when he was alive,\" Mrs. Tierney said coolly. \"", "Why would he be coming to you dead?\"", "\n\n\"There's ice water in your veins,\" he said.", "\n\n\"There's sawdust in your head.\"", "\n\n\"He's dead.\"", "\n\n\"He let your mother die without you.\"", "\n\n\"I didn't know.\"", "\n\n\"The bastard didn't tell you.\"", "\n\n\"He was bitter.\"", "\n\n\"He was hateful. ", "He hated me.\"", "\n\n\"Us.\"", "\n\n\"Us, then.\"", "\n\n\"Have a heart. ", "There was a monkey on his back. ", "That cripple in the room upstairs.\"", "\n\n\"Where's my violin?\"", "\n\n\"Have some pity.\"", "\n\n\"Have some sense.\"", "\n\n\"I'll go alone, then.\"", "\n\nThere was a pause. ", "He had spoken the one word she could not abide: alone. ", "All through his growing up, our father said, he couldn't walk to the corner for a newspaper without his mother urging him to take someone along.", "\n\n\"Take Patrick, then,\" she said. \"", "He's got his name.\"", "\n\n\"I will,\" he said.", "\n\nIt was the laughter in her voice when next she spoke that signaled to their children that the fight was over. ", "That it had brewed some pleasure for them both. \"", "If the bastard's going to haunt anyone,\" she said, \"it will be Patrick.\"", "\n\nMr. Tierney said, \"A ghost could do worse.\"", "\n\nAnd so our father found himself on the train to Poughkeepsie for the funeral of his grandfather, and namesake, a man he'd never met.", "\n\nAlthough Michael Tierney was wearing what he called his \"civilian clothes\"—starched collar, vest, fine dark wool suit with a thin, pale violet stripe, gleaming shoes, brushed bowler—he retained nevertheless his erect and elegant doorman's bearing throughout the ride. ", "There was a gold watch and a fob, subtly displayed across his trim middle. ", "A smooth cheek newly shaven and redolent of bay rum. ", "A fine chestnut mustache, gleaming like polished wood, trimmed and combed.", "\n\nThe suit Patrick wore was also fine. ", "It had been purchased from a Jewish tailor on the Lower East Side—one of his father's \"cronies\"—for his older brother's high school graduation just the year before, but because Tom had found work at the Navy Yard, and not in an office, it had been stored ever since in a linen suit bag, weighted with mothballs and cedar blocks.", "\n\nGiven the short notice—the telegram had come from his grandfather's maiden sister, Rose, just two days ago—his mother had only a single sunny afternoon to air it at the window, and so it retained a whiff of what his father called \"its hibernation.\" ", "Comically, Mr. Tierney sprinkled his son with cologne before they left the apartment, making the sign of the cross and murmuring in Latin. ", "And so they had gone off to the train in good humor.", "\n\nHis mother had refused to come. ", "Perfectly understandable, Mr. Tierney said, given how the man had stood against their marriage. ", "Because she was an immigrant. ", "Because she was a servant girl in the home of an Upper West Side family who summered in Poughkeepsie—a wealthy family that his own father had admired and envied and aspired to imitate. ", "It had been an elevation for his father, a schoolteacher, the child of immigrants himself, to be invited to the summer home of such people. ", "A confirmation of the schoolteacher's growing status as town sage, as cosmopolitan man-of-the-world, to be invited to converse with a city man of such wealth, in his own summer place, about business and politics, philosophy and learning.", "\n\nAnd an irreconcilable insult that the schoolteacher, so honored, should bring along a son—\"Yours truly,\" Mr. Tierney told Patrick on the train to Poughkeepsie, \"and not much older than you are now\"—who, rather than attending to the after-dinner conversation, rather than seizing the opportunity to make himself remarkable to this businessman from Manhattan, a man who might do him some good, put his eyes on a buck-toothed servant girl and refused to draw them away.", "\n\n\"Of course your mother's not buck-toothed,\" his father said on the train, \"she's a beauty beyond compare—but that was my father's anger speaking, his disappointment and his rage. ", "He didn't want me coming down in the world, he wanted me going up, up, and up.\" ", "On the train, Michael Tierney thrust his right hand into the air as if he were elevating a great weight. ", "Then he dropped it, casually. ", "Shrugged.", "\n\nIt was a fine spring day, and as soon as the train left the city, the smell of new grass and rich earth, sweet country air, began to fill the cars. ", "At each station stop, the sun was morning-bright and full of lovely, floating things, white seed pods and green insects, butterflies and bumblebees. ", "There were urns of vivid flowers at each train station, and the men and women who disembarked seemed all to be greeted by handsome children and happy dogs. ", "His father had given him the window seat when they boarded and then sat with regal bearing on the aisle, tipping his hat to every new passenger. \"", "Lovely day,\" he said. \"", "Madam.\" \"", "Sir.\" \"", "Good morning.\" \"", "Fine weather.\" ", "The doorman's trade.", "\n\nA woman who had already been greeted rose into the aisle to wait for the station ahead. ", "Michael Tierney touched his hat to her again, and she beamed at the two of them. ", "She was not a young woman, but she wore a pale spring suit and a summer fur and there was a gold bracelet over the wrist of the gloved hand that gripped the back of the seat in front of them. \"", "Is this your son?\" ", "she asked, and his father said, laughing, \"I stand accused.\"", "\n\n\"He's very handsome,\" she said, and his father looked at him and feigned a start. \"", "Is he?\"", "\n\nThe train was coming into the station. \"", "You are a very handsome pair,\" the woman said, her eyes all on his father. ", "Once more his father raised his hat as she left them, smiling, for the door. ", "Father and son exchanged a look of chagrin, and then his father, dear man, put out his hand and patted the boy's knee. ", "There wasn't a chance, they both knew, that an estrangement of any sort would ever drive them apart.", "\n\nThe station at Poughkeepsie bustled somewhat more than the others, but it was a country station nonetheless. ", "His father knew the way. ", "It was a small brick church, already filling up with what appeared to be the town's oldest citizens. ", "Gray-haired men and stooped women in floor-sweeping skirts. ", "The mothball scent of hibernation all about their clothes. ", "The pallbearers—the coffin was a gleaming mahogany—seemed the youngest of the attendees, but even they were thick about the middle. ", "Patrick heard their straining breaths as they carried the coffin down the aisle. ", "They were followed by only two mourners. ", "One was a tiny woman smiling like a bride behind her black veil, and beside her, walking slowly, with practiced patience, a one-legged man who leaned on a crutch, the sleeve of his missing arm pinned neatly against his shoulder. ", "His hair was the pale orange of an ancient redhead, with a streak of pure white on the right side, above a gnarled patch of silver scar tissue, the twisted remains of an ear.", "\n\n\"Aunt Rose,\" his father whispered from behind him. \"", "My father's sister. ", "And Red Whelan. ", "My father's substitute in the war.\"", "\n\nAfter the funeral mass, a flushed and heavy man, a friend of his father's youth, recognized him in the milling crowd. ", "He offered them a ride to the cemetery in an open car that was an adventure for Patrick since there was no need to own a car in Brooklyn. ", "Patrick, in the back seat, stretched himself along the leather upholstery. ", "The day was brighter still, growing warm, the green landscape, lawns and fields and budding trees, was luxuriant, wide open, a painted stage set to his city eyes: there was a simple red barn, comical black-and-white cows, a cartoon silo. ", "Over the whir of the engine and the jostle of the springs, he heard his father say, \"And I see old Red is still with us.\" ", "The friend wore a straw boater, much like Patrick's own. \"", "A tough bird,\" the man cried. \"", "But no tougher than Rose. ", "Still his caretaker.\"", "\n\nHis father turned to shout into the backseat. \"", "Red Whelan,\" he began, but the car swerved a bit, avoiding a hole in the road, and an impatience passed over his father's face, as brief as passing sunlight. ", "He began again, \"Red Whelan is the man who served in the Union Army so my father didn't have to. ", "Saved my old man's skin. ", "Made it possible for me to be born.\"", "\n\nThe friend behind the wheel shouted a laugh at this, and then nodded, as if the connection had taken him by surprise. \"", "Isn't that the truth?\" ", "he said. ", "And added, more solemnly, \"No truer words,\" as if to amend his surprise.", "\n\nMichael Tierney threw an arm over the backrest, so he could get a better look at his son, lounging as he was in the wide backseat of the jaunty car. ", "He aimed a finger at the boy's chest, added, \"Which means Red Whelan made it possible for you to be born, too.\"", "\n\nPatrick sat up straight, as if in response to a reprimand. ", "But the landscape was not a serious landscape, it was full of broad greens and bright blues and clichéd farmsteads. ", "The car puttered and squeaked like something in a circus. ", "The scenery, this talk of the past, the day itself, was straight from the funny papers. ", "He took none of it seriously.", "\n\nThe stout friend was shouting back to him, eyes on the rearview mirror. \"", "Think of that, my boy. ", "You might never have been. ", "You!\" ", "he called out. \"", "The first-born son.\" ", "Patrick resisted the impulse to correct him: Tom was the first-born. \"", "The finest fruit of Red's sacrifice,\" he went on, enjoying himself. \"", "You. ", "A barefoot boy with cheeks of tan. ", "Here only by the grace of old Red Whelan.\"", "\n\nThat shadow of impatience passed over his father's features once again. ", "He was, perhaps, remembering how little he liked this old friend. \"", "Nothing is certain,\" he said, sober and annoyed. \"", "My father might well have survived the war unscathed if he'd gone. ", "If Red Whelan hadn't replaced him, he might have survived nonetheless. ", "No one knows.\" ", "He turned to face the windshield again, and then, after a few moments of consideration, turned to his son once more. \"", "Although I suppose you should thank the man,\" his father said. \"", "If you get the chance.\"", "\n\nAt the gravesite, Red Whelan was already seated, so old and thin he looked sunk into his clothes. ", "His uniform. ", "In the sunlight, Patrick now noticed the faded stripe on his one outstretched leg. ", "Sunlight caught as well the golden buttons on his jacket and a medal on his chest. ", "With his broad face and his thick hair, his skull at the top of his narrow shoulders seemed as big and as buoyant as an outsized balloon. ", "Seemed, in fact, to lift him out of the chair when the service was ended and the casket—no flag because it was Red Whelan who had served—was lowered into the freshly dug earth. ", "But in fact it was the little woman, his father's Aunt Rose, who got him standing, got him steady on his crutch, even in the soft uneven grass. ", "Even though, despite how stooped he was, she came only to his shoulder. ", "His caretaker.", "\n\nDriving back to town, the friend of his father's youth was full of regret—he clucked his tongue at every other sentence—for the lost years of their acquaintance, for the lost time of their boyhoods together. ", "Without inquiring about their plans, he drove Patrick and his father to the house in Poughkeepsie for the luncheon. ", "It was a pretty house, narrow and tall, brick-red shingles and white trim. ", "A small front porch, a spreading oak, fading daffodils with their heads bent in the front yard, and a not-yet-blossomed row of lilacs along the side, under a bowed picture window hung with lace.", "\n\nThe funeral guests were parking their cars all up and down the shaded street or walking along the sidewalk, as father and son and the clucking friend made their way up the flagstone path. ", "As they reached the painted steps, the black funeral car pulled into the rutted drive and stopped. ", "The driver stepped out to open the door for Aunt Rose, and then she, in turn, put out a hand for Red Whelan. ", "Together the two slowly crossed the lawn. ", "His father's friend, greeting them, said, \"Miss Tierney, Red,\" and then stepped back to show them Patrick.", "\n\nThe boy swept off the straw boater and placed it over his heart, waiting to be introduced to this frail man who had once been a soldier. ", "But no one said a word. ", "His father had moved away, was already up the steps, standing at the front door, with his own hat against his chest. ", "He had opened the door for them and was standing, waiting, holding back the screen. ", "The corpulent friend of his youth was chuckling, but so quietly, so deeply in his throat, that the sound seemed to come from something nattering in the trees.", "\n\nAunt Rose smiled, her hand on Red Whelan's arm. ", "Only her teeth and her eyes shone behind the black netting of her veil. ", "With no introductions made, Patrick said, \"How do you do?\"", "\n\nRed Whelan was concentrating on the slow movement of his crutch as he lifted it from the grass of the lawn to the blue slate of the walkway. ", "This close to the man, Patrick saw that the injury that had plowed his flesh, taken his ear, turned his hair all white on one side, seemed only a part of the general redness nature had given his skin, the general havoc that time had played with his ravaged old face and neck and single, skeletal hand.", "\n\n\"I'm Patrick Tierney,\" our father said, addressing the man. ", "He threw his head back. \"", "You went to the war for my grandfather. ", "You went instead of him.\" ", "And did not know why, since he'd never met his grandfather, his namesake, he was suddenly overwhelmed. ", "He felt his face grow warm, felt in his throat the hard knot of rising tears. ", "Felt, too, in a flash of imagination that set his teeth on edge, the pain—churned flesh and mud and howling blood—this man must have endured. ", "The suffering.", "\n\n\"I'm Patrick Tierney,\" he said again, more boldly. \"", "I'm the grandson.\"", "\n\nAunt Rose patted the shoulder of his fine suit. \"", "You are,\" she said, a kind of encouragement.", "\n\nBut Red Whelan said nothing. ", "The small eyes in his broad face looked up briefly, passed over him, and then fell again to the tip of his crutch. ", "He moved the crutch to another part of the slate, hopped a bit to follow it, his one shoe broad and worn, his breath laboring. ", "Aunt Rose gripped his arm. ", "Something of the mothball odor of his own clothes as Red Whelan brushed past him.", "\n\nThe two climbed the steps, Aunt Rose beside the old man, her arm across his back. ", "Red Whelan paid no attention to the doorman either, but, head down, back bent, made his way into the black interior of the house, his medal—for it was indeed a medal on a grimy ribbon, although there was no telling (our father told us) if it was his—swaying against the worn fabric of his soldier's coat.", "\n\nNeither of them, father or son—the handsome fruit of Red Whelan's sacrifice—of any interest at all to the old man, no worthy impediment at all to his determination to go inside and have his lunch.", "\n\nAt the door, Aunt Rose nodded to his father as he held back the screen and then went in with her charge. ", "The corpulent friend went in as well. ", "Patrick, too, climbed the stairs, thinking to follow them, but his father took a pinch of his sleeve and told him to wait. ", "Together, father and son stood at the opened door until all the funeral guests had gone in, Michael greeting each, \"Good day,\" \"Fine weather.\" ", "Some recognized him and offered condolences. ", "Others leaned into their companions even as they crossed the threshold to ask who he was. ", "When the last had gone in, and no more cars moved slowly down the street, Michael Tierney closed the screen door gently and returned his fine bowler to his head, giving its rim, as he liked to do, that extra, two-fingered skim.", "\n\n\"Let's go,\" he said.", "\n\nThey had only made it to the bottom of the steps when a female voice, thickly Irish, called after them. \"", "You're not coming in?\"", "\n\nFather and son turned to see a dark-haired maid behind the screen, a bundle of women's coats in her arms. ", "She wore a white cap with a black ribbon, and although the screen was a kind of veil, she was clearly a beauty, big-eyed, sweet-faced.", "\n\n\"We're not,\" Michael Tierney said.", "\n\nHalfway down the slate path, father and son turned again to see her. ", "She was still behind the screen. ", "The father tucked his hand up beneath his son's arm, pulling him away. \"", "Let's not have you marrying any Irish housemaids,\" he said wryly. \"", "Let's not have history repeating itself.\"", "\n\nThe two had lunch together, looking so sharp, in the elegant restaurant of a local hotel. ", "His father carried a flask from which he poured himself two whiskies before their steaks arrived, and then two more to have with his coffee.", "\n\nOn the train ride home his father said—under the influence, no doubt—\"I wonder if it irked my father to see Red Whelan outlive him. ", "I wonder if he thought, as he lay dying, that perhaps for three hundred dollars more Red Whelan would take his place again.\"", "\n\nHe told his son how Red Whelan had come back from the war, a knock at the door one evening while the family was at dinner. ", "His own father but a young man then. ", "How Red Whelan, a young man, too, was brought upstairs to the attic room he would have for the rest of his life. ", "Aunt Rose, just a child, wordlessly taking on the responsibility that she bore even now, and would bear into the future, or at least until that day—not far away, it would seem—when Red Whelan's life finally came to a close. \"", "Lord knows what she'll do with herself then,\" he said. \"", "She'll be both an old maid and a kind of widow. ", "No family but myself.\" ", "And then added, \"And you children.\"", "\n\nAs the train came into the city, Mr. Tierney said the last time he saw his father, the man had grabbed him up under the arm as they stood on the very same threshold he had not crossed this afternoon. ", "Michael Tierney was leaving home for the last time. ", "Elizabeth Breen, his Lizzie, was meeting him at the train. ", "They would be married the next morning in Brooklyn, where her family lived. \"", "Is this what Red Whelan threw away an arm and a leg for?\" ", "his father asked him. (", "Our father, telling us the story, added, \"Thus coining a phrase.\") \"", "So the fruit of his sacrifice can drag us back to the slums?\"", "\n\nThe man whispering his furious question, as if Red Whelan, two floors above and without half his hearing, might catch the words.", "\n\n\"You can be sure I didn't whisper my reply,\" Michael Tierney said as the train returned to the city. \"", "I spoke it clearly, right into his face. ", "I said, 'One life's already been given to save your skin. ", "I won't give you mine as well.' ", "Those were the last words we ever exchanged.\"", "\n\nHe turned to his son, his teeth bared beneath the polished mustache and his eyes briefly pained. ", "But the pain quickly slipped away. ", "He smiled. \"", "It's all the past,\" he said, and reached out again to touch the boy's knee. ", "He looked him over fondly, brushed the lapel of the new suit. \"", "Still,\" he added—the whiskey had made him flushed—\"I might have forgiven him. ", "The old bastard.\"", "\n\nPatrick said, \"He might have forgiven you.\"", "\n\nOne more recollection of that day:\n\nLate that night, after he'd been some hours asleep, Patrick woke in the darkness. ", "His brother Tom slept soundly in the next bed. ", "No stirring in the room beside them where his four sisters sometimes laughed or fought or tapped the wall in the middle of the night. ", "Street noise, sure, but faint at this hour, and nothing to tell him why he woke so fully and so abruptly, wide-eyed in the darkness. ", "In the darkness, he recalled the wooden coffin, gleaming with sunlight, as it went down into the fresh-cut earth. ", "He thought of Red Whelan's cold failure to acknowledge him, the shining, spiffy, living fruit of the old man's sacrifice. ", "He recalled his mother laughing as she said, If he's going to haunt anyone, it will be Patrick.", "\n\nHe looked to the vague, pale blue—ghostly, yes—light at the one window. ", "Was there a face in the glass? ", "Was that a cat yowling in the back of the house, or a banshee? ", "A lost soul? ", "He imagined his own soul—a pale, startled version of himself—clutched in his bitter grandfather's bony hands like a thin blue rag. ", "He imagined being dragged through the empty streets outside, lamplight and darkness, black wet pavement, fences and fire escapes and tumbled yards—slums, his grandfather had called them—up, up, up, into utter darkness.", "\n\nTom waking tomorrow to find only his brother's body in the bed, a hollow shell, empty-eyed, thin-skinned. ", "Only dust. ", "Is this what Red Whelan lost an arm and a leg for?", "\n\nHe felt the prickly heat of fear on his neck, in his spine, at the soles of his feet. ", "He wished with everything in him that his father had never said whatever it was he'd said at their final parting, about one life for another. ", "One life to save your skin.", "\n\nHe had worked himself, under his blankets, into a froth of dread when he heard his father's voice and his mother's in the dining room, and knew he was hearing again what had woken him so abruptly. ", "His father was saying, \"Too late, too late,\" and his mother replying, soothingly, \"Nothing to be done, Michael. ", "Nothing to be done.\" ", "Patrick knew without seeing that his father had his hand around a glass. ", "He heard—impossible, of course—the glass go to his father's lips, the soft swallow. ", "And then his father's voice rose abruptly and Patrick recognized the phrase that, just moments ago, had pulled him out of a deep sleep. \"", "I loved the man,\" his father said, moaning it. \"", "I loved him.\"", "\n\nThere was another silence. ", "His father was crying.", "\n\nIt all would have been too terrible, his own fear, his father's sorrow, the cats yowling in some distant yard, the face of the old man at his window, if his mother's voice hadn't, at last, broken the spell.", "\n\n\"You did,\" she said. ", "He recognized her tone: the smooth voice richly amused: the end of the argument. \"", "But love's a tonic, Michael, not a cure. ", "He was a bastard still.\"", "\n\nTwo weeks later a letter came from Aunt Rose. ", "Beautifully composed—the lines written straight in black India ink and the handwriting, Spencerian script, so beautiful, their father called the girls to admire it before he read out what the letter had to say. ", "Aunt Rose was very sorry that he had not come into the house after his father's funeral. ", "She had not anticipated the depth of his anger. ", "Righteous anger, she said, to be sure. ", "My brother was an unhappy man, she said. ", "Weighed down all his life by the burden of gratitude.", "\n\nGratitude, their father pointed out, glancing at their mother. \"", "A monkey on his back.\"", "\n\nNow, the letter said, Red Whelan was gone. ", "She was composing this in his attic room, which was full of his absence. ", "She had lived out her life at his side, she said, and she had done her duty gladly. ", "She had no complaints to make. ", "She had been his companion through the years and he hers. ", "Now she was alone. ", "One generation passes away, she wrote. ", "And then she gave their father instructions to contact a lawyer on Water Street. ", "In reparation for their estrangement, she was giving him everything his father had left her. ", "She would move out of the house, take an apartment in town. ", "She would make do on what she and Red Whelan had saved together over these many years. ", "She asked only that he write to her now and then. ", "She said she would do the same. ", "She said she would pray for him and his family every morning and every night for the rest of her days.", "\n\nLiz Tierney said, \"She's looking for someone to take care of her when she grows feeble.\"", "\n\nWasn't she the soothsayer? ", "our father said.", "\n\nFour months later, the family moved again. ", "This time to a three-story house on Second Street. ", "Their own home, purchased with the inheritance. ", "It was a row house, nothing pretty, but five bedrooms—five. ", "One for the two boys, one for the twins, one for the two younger girls. ", "A wide bedroom for the parents, and, after all that spreading out, an empty bedroom left over, suitable for a boarder or a guest.", "\n\nSuitable for Sally when she came to the door, late in the afternoon of the day she returned from Chicago. ", "Beside her was the same rattan suitcase she had carried on the train, containing still the four chemises, six pairs of stockings, three muslin nightgowns without embroidery or decoration—the immaculate clothes that were to bring her to her new life.", "\n\nBehind her stood Sister Lucy, who could insist.", "\nTrue\n\nWith old aunt Rose ensconced in our attic, Sister Jeanne raised her eyes to the ceiling. ", "Here's a story, she told us.", "\n\nThis happened in France, in the last century. ", "Jeanne Jugan was a kind woman who worked in the homes of the wealthy. ", "One day, she came across a blind widow who had been put out on the street by her family. ", "Put out on the street to die. ", "Jeanne Jugan took the old woman to her own home, bathed her and fed her. ", "She tucked the old lady into her bed and moved a pallet to the attic just above her head, where Jeanne Jugan slept within earshot of the poor soul.", "\n\nNot long after that, Jeanne Jugan came upon another old woman who had been abandoned on the street and she took that woman in, too. ", "And then another. ", "And another.", "\n\nLife was very hard for the old in those days. ", "For poor widows especially. ", "Who needed them? ", "The small and the weak and the old. ", "They got in the way of rushing, robust life, see? ", "They were a pain in the neck. ", "Always frail and sick. ", "So people asked themselves, Who needs them?", "\n\nWord got out, and people around the town began to bring their old folks to Jeanne Jugan. ", "But there are always as many good people as there are bad. ", "Better believe it. ", "Soon other women who were as kind as Jeanne heard about the work she was doing and asked if they could help her. ", "Some of these good women moved into Jeanne's attic, too, so they would be available any time of the day or night. ", "The community expanded. ", "The number of old folks who were cared for grew and grew.", "\n\nJeanne Jugan went to the priest. ", "She asked if the women could form a religious community of their own, to help guide their lives as they did this good and difficult work. ", "They held a meeting in Jeanne's attic and there they drew up their plan to become the Little Sisters of the Poor.", "\n\nEvery day, Jeanne put her basket over her arm and went out to collect food and money for her people. ", "She would never take no for an answer, see? ", "One rich man got so angry at her persistence—Sister Jeanne waved a fist in the air, imitating him—he punched her right in the face. ", "Knocked her down.", "\n\nWhen she got up again, she said, \"Yes, but my ladies are still hungry.\" ", "Then he gave her all the money he had.", "\n\nWhenever people said to Jeanne Jugan, \"Oh good Lord, Sister, I gave you money yesterday,\" she said, \"But my ladies are hungry again today.\"", "\n\nJeanne Jugan became famous. ", "The President of France gave her a gold medal for her good work, and what do you think she did? ", "She melted it down and used it to buy a bigger house for her ladies.", "\n\nSister Jeanne said, I heard this story from my spiritual advisor when I was a young nun: One day, Charles Dickens came to see Jeanne Jugan. ", "Maybe he had read about her in the papers, I don't know. ", "But what do you think she said to the guy?", "\n\nWe couldn't answer.", "\n\nShe said he should put his money where his mouth is. ", "So he gave her a big donation.", "\n\nAnd then he wrote somewhere or other that she was the holiest person he had ever met. ", "Isn't that something?", "\n\nWe said it was something.", "\n\nBut all the while good Jeanne Jugan was busy doing her work, the priest who had advised her was off scheming. ", "He went to Rome and told them _he_ was the one who started the order. ", "He said he was the one who found the first blind widow on the street and he was the one who told Jeanne Jugan to take care of her. ", "He was the one who invited the other women to help out. ", "And the priests in Rome fell for it. ", "They made him the head of the order. ", "And they put up a plaque on Jeanne Jugan's house that said HERE FATHER SO-AND-SO FOUNDED THE LITTLE SISTERS OF THE POOR.", "\n\nAnd that wasn't the worst of it, Sister Jeanne said.", "\n\nThere was a very young nun in the order, and this priest liked her better than Jeanne Jugan. ", "He put her in charge and told Jeanne she could no longer go around with her basket. ", "She could just stay inside, do some housekeeping, train some novices. ", "Jeanne said to the priest, \"You have taken my work from me.\" ", "And then she said, \"But I gladly give it to you.\" ", "And that's how she lived the rest of her life. ", "Staying inside.", "\n\nAs the years went by, people forgot that Jeanne was the founder of the order.", "\n\nBut, listen, Sister Jeanne said, life is like the blink of an eye.", "\n\nThe young nun the lying priest had put in charge became an old woman herself, and as death approached, she knew she had to set the record straight. ", "An investigation was made, and sure enough, the plaque on Jeanne's house was changed to say HERE JEANNE JUGAN FOUNDED THE LITTLE SISTERS OF THE POOR.", "\n\nSister Jeanne sat back in her chair, the light of the fading afternoon just behind her. ", "We sat back, too, satisfied, as children will be, at any tale that is resolved with the restoration of order. ", "Children who know, without instruction or study, what is fair.", "\n\nBut then we saw that old Sister Jeanne was laughing inside her bonnet. ", "It's all silliness, she said. ", "Don't you see?", "\n\nJeanne Jugan was already in heaven with Our Lord.", "\n\nWhat in the world would she care about a plaque on an old building in the country of France? ", "Whatever glory was taken from her here on earth had already been restored a hundred times, a million times, and more.", "\n\nMore happiness than any of us can imagine, Sister Jeanne said. ", "More beauty than any of us on earth can bear.", "\n\nI'll never see it, she said. ", "But all of youse will.", "\n\nThe point to remember, Sister Jeanne said— _pernt_ , she said—is that truth finds the light. ", "Lies, big or small, never stay hidden. ", "She pushed the air with the palm of her hand—a comic gesture that said _Go on with you_ —So don't even bother telling lies, she said.", "\n\nTruth reveals itself. ", "It's really quite amazing.", "\n\nGod wants us to know the truth in all things, she said, big or small, because that's how we'll know Him.", "\n\nIn all her simplicity, old Sister Jeanne told us, \"It's really that simple.\"", "\nA Tonic\n\nOn her first afternoon at the sanatorium upstate, Sister Illuminata left the porch where the patients were lined up like bolts of linen and wandered through the wings of the cottage. ", "She wanted only solitude. ", "She had already endured the crowded crossing in steerage, the filth and the sickness. ", "She had endured the constant entreaties from every poor Catholic on board, and had brushed from her veil and from the hem of her skirt the traces of spit that had been directed at her from those who were not. ", "She stood in the knocking crowds on Ellis Island, elbow to elbow. ", "And although her habit earned her only a cursory stethoscope to her lungs—through her bib, no less—from a harried and blushing doctor, she'd had barely a night alone in her convent room when Dr. Hannigan, less afraid and more thorough than the government doctor had been, sent her to the sanatorium.", "\n\nWhen a nurse there—a Sister of Mercy herself—tried to stop her from going off alone, Sister Illuminata said, lying, that it was a stipulation of her own order that she say her afternoon Office on her feet. ", "She wouldn't be long.", "\n\nSo it was that she found herself drawn by the luxury of silence to a section of the cottage that was not currently in use—the back of the house, where a winter sunroom she had seen from the drive had now, in midsummer, been given over to storage. ", "Her beads in her hand, she turned from the darkened hallway into the bright space. ", "The air here was hazy, full of dust motes and vague sunbeams, stiflingly hot. ", "There were bed frames and wicker chaises piled haphazardly. ", "A green-and-white linoleum floor that was glazed with sunlight. ", "The dull silence was exactly what she had sought. ", "But then a human sound disturbed it: a long sigh that rippled across the stifling air like breath on water.", "\n\nIn an instant, her eyes found them: a man and a woman, half kneeling, half crouching. ", "They were pressed together in a corner of the hot room, pressed up against each other, behind an iron bedstead that seemed to enclose them. ", "Both had slipped their white robes from their shoulders. ", "Both moved with the same slow, stuttering rhythm. ", "Sister could see the woman's bare throat, corded and straining, the white flesh of her breasts and the brown of her nipples. ", "She could see the man's shoulder blades, the short bones of his spine as they pressed themselves against the paper-thin skin. ", "He rose up over her, she arched herself toward him. ", "He was an old man, white hair on the back of his head, across his shoulders, and all along his skeletal arms.", "\n\nBriefly, Sister thought there was something angelic about their pale struggle, the winged shoulder blades, the tangled bodies, the soft folds of their white robes, and the dusty, streaming sunlight. ", "But then she saw how their mouths were wide open, black and straining. ", "Opened helplessly as if in sudden reflex—as if to expel the short, ragged breaths they were taking. ", "Precious breaths in this place.", "\n\nSister Illuminata saw them for only a moment before she turned away. ", "There is a hunger, she thought.", "\n\nThe woman was a young mother from a wealthy family—Sister Illuminata's own age. ", "She died within the month. ", "The old man was a doctor from Syracuse, New York, who went home with his family the same week Sister Illuminata returned to the convent—both of them, he said, with lungs forever scarred by their ordeal. ", "There is a hunger. ", "It was a lesson she had learned and then forgotten across the years she had labored in the convent laundry. ", "But she remembered it again when Sally returned from Chicago and Sister Lucy explained to a small coterie of the nuns: Illuminata and Jeanne, Sister Eugenia and old Sister Miriam, what the girl had discovered.", "\n\nThey were in what the Sisters humbly called the refectory; it was, in fact, the rich man's former drawing room. ", "It was elegant still, high-ceilinged, paneled, with the same thick silk draperies he had paid for. ", "It was where the Sisters took their simple meals, but it was also the site for card parties and ladies' teas, Christmas gatherings for the neighborhood poor, visits from the Bishop. ", "A room the nuns used to impress both the indigent and the hoi polloi.", "\n\nThe small bulbs in the chandelier above the polished table where the nuns now sat reflected prettily in the dark wood, like starlight on a pond. ", "As Sister Lucy spoke about the arrangements she had made to remove Sally from the scene of her mother's \"indiscretion,\" Sister Illuminata recalled that she had seen such a pond, such dancing starlight, at the sanatorium upstate. ", "She recalled the pond, the bracing cold night, the tall black pines in the distant darkness, and the flavor of pine on the air. ", "She became aware once more of the ache in her scarred lungs. ", "She recalled the old doctor.", "\n\nShe remembered the lesson she had learned on her first afternoon at the sanatorium, had learned but forgotten: There is a hunger.", "\n\nNow Lucy was speaking of the property that was to be left to the Sisters, an estate out on Long Island. ", "A rambling house the order would convert to an old folks' home, the acreage that might accommodate a hospital someday. ", "This was a realm of convent business Sister Illuminata had little to do with—upstairs business was how she referred to it—the stuff, as she saw it, of ambition and vanity as much as it was a part of the Sisters' mission to serve the sick poor. ", "There was goodness in it, of course, and the generosity of the Catholic family who had left the Sisters the land. ", "Sister Lucy said the property would not come to them free and clear. ", "But the motherhouse in Chicago would work with the diocese here. ", "The Bishop approved. ", "Some of the good ladies of the Auxiliary had volunteered their husbands, Wall Street men, bankers, men of the world.", "\n\nThere was goodness in it all, of course, but there was greed, too. ", "Sister Illuminata heard it in Lucy's eager voice: acreage and a house and banks and mortgages, the Bishop, the Cardinal.", "\n\nMore good, Sister Lucy said, than any one Sister could do on her own, going door to door.", "\n\nIt was the kind of worldly ambition, Sister Illuminata thought, that well suited Sister Lucy's mannish face. ", "And then prayed to be forgiven for the unkindness.", "\n\nThis was no time, Sister Lucy was saying, to disturb the ladies in the Auxiliary, or to stir gossip in the neighborhood, by throwing out onto the street a widow known these nearly twenty years as the laundress in the convent.", "\n\nSister Illuminata raised her eyes from the electric starlight reflected in the dining table's shine. ", "She felt that old ache in her lungs. ", "And in her swollen knees. ", "She knew the time would come, soon perhaps, when the trip down to the laundry, the trip back up again, would be impossible for her. ", "She was well aware that even now, without Annie's help, she could not manage half the tasks, most of the tasks, the convent needed her to do. ", "If Annie was to be dismissed, no doubt another, younger nun would be assigned to take her place, or perhaps another needy widow from the neighborhood. ", "The long hours Sister Illuminata spent in her chair beside the ironing board, sometimes—with Annie's good indulgence—just dozing, would be exposed. ", "Sister Illuminata, all other usefulness gone, would be brought every morning to an office lobby or a drafty subway entrance or to the vestibule of some busy store, a woven alms basket to hold on her lap. ", "The cane she now used an extra added attraction.", "\n\nSister Lucy was saying, \"If Sister Illuminata will have her.\"", "\n\nThey all directed their eyes toward Sister Illuminata.", "\n\nCaught by surprise, she only nodded gravely.", "\n\n\"I suggest we keep her here, then,\" Sister Lucy said. \"", "Whether she amends her life or no.\"", "\n\nAnd then they called Annie into the room. ", "She stood with her hands folded before her, her back straight. \"", "No\" was the answer.", "\n\nOnce more, the cathedral light, the light of painted holy cards, streamed from the high windows to touch the girl's shoulders and her bowed head. ", "Sally was crouched on the floor beside the nun, leaned into her lap. ", "The Ninth Hour prayers had just ended. ", "Sally visited now only when her mother was out—at the shops, they continued to say, as if the truth of what her mother was up to on these afternoons could not assail the custom of their belief, their determined innocence.", "\n\nThere is a hunger, Sister Illuminata told the girl.", "\n\n\"A hunger to be comforted\" was how our mother recalled it.", "\n\nBut the nun's language in these matters—matters of the body, of the flesh, what went on between women and men—was limited. ", "Her experience limited as well.", "\n\nShe put her hand on the girl's head. ", "Leaned as close to her familiar, sweet-scented hair as the starched bonnet would allow. \"", "We can pray for your mother's soul,\" she said. \"", "We can offer up our work, the way we do for the souls in purgatory.\" ", "She paused. ", "Felt the old assurance of words she understood. \"", "Maybe there are some extra works of mercy you could do. ", "Something you can offer up to God in the name of your mother.\"", "\n\n\"I don't like nursing, Sister,\" Sally said. ", "Stubborn. \"", "I'm no good at it.\"", "\n\n\"It doesn't have to be nursing,\" Sister Illuminata said. \"", "It doesn't have to be religious life.\" ", "Sally was leaning against her lap, looking up at her warily. ", "Sister could feel the quick impatience in the girl's young bones. ", "A coiled energy that had been there since her childhood, that Sister only now was willing to acknowledge was proof of Lucy's assessment that marriage might settle her.", "\n\n\"You could simply do some good in your mother's name,\" she said. \"", "Until your mother's ready to do something for herself.\"", "\n\nSally narrowed her eyes, as if to see Sister's point. ", "Her plain lovely face was not as childish as it once had been. ", "Today she wore some face powder that obscured her fading freckles. ", "Some rosy color on her chapped lips as well. ", "Mr. Tierney had found her a small job in the tearoom at the hotel, three afternoons a week. ", "Sister Illuminata took the makeup to mean the end of the girl's vocation.", "\n\n\"A kind of penance,\" Sister said. \"", "A way to gain some indulgence for her. ", "For her soul.\"", "\n\nAbove them, the sound of the Sisters' footsteps as they were leaving the chapel. ", "Only a few of the nuns had returned to the convent today, most had stayed out on casework, need being what it was in the neighborhood.", "\n\n\"Maybe we can find some poor creature you can help. ", "Maybe an old woman who would love your companionship. ", "Maybe a young mother nearby who needs help with her children. ", "We can ask the Sisters. ", "We can find you some good you could do. ", "For your mother's sake. ", "You can offer it up. ", "For the salvation of her soul.\"", "\n\nSister Illuminata heard Sister Jeanne's light step on the basement stairs. ", "Sally placed her cheek on the nun's wide lap. \"", "She won't,\" she said. ", "And Sister heard Annie's own determination in the girl's voice. \"", "She won't change. ", "She calls him 'dear.'\"", "\n\n\"We'll find some good work for you to do,\" Sister Illuminata said once more, raising her voice, hoping that Sister Jeanne would hear her, even as she understood the vanity of this, this long, silly competition for the girl's affection. \"", "Prayer and good work together will surely move Our Lord to grant you what you ask for.\"", "\n\nSally raised her head again. ", "Sister Illuminata was surprised to see there were no tears—only, in her searching brown eyes, what would have been, when she was young, the prelude to mischief. \"", "Mrs. Costello,\" Sally whispered. ", "She said, \"Sister Lucy thinks she's a faker, but I don't. ", "I could go sit with her when she's all alone. ", "She hates being alone.\" ", "She raised her pale brows, her eyes full of childish mischief. \"", "I could sit with Mrs. Costello while her husband's away,\" Sally said. \"", "What would my mother think of that?\"", "\n\nSister Illuminata was about to object—the notion both confused and dismayed her—when she looked up and saw Sister Jeanne leaning over the banister. ", "In the bright afternoon sunlight Sister Jeanne was mostly silhouette, her hand to her heart.", "\n\nSister Illuminata placed her arm around Sally's shoulders. ", "She touched the girl's soft hair. ", "It was sinful, the way she competed with Jeanne—a sin she could never confess or define. ", "Her need to be the girl's favorite, to be loved beyond all the other nuns in the convent by this confused and mortal child, was inexplicable, even to herself. ", "A hunger.", "\n\n\"That's a fine idea,\" Sister Illuminata said.", "\nMercy\n\nThe laundry at the St. Francis Hotel was a far cry from the dark and efficient realm of the convent basement, but Sally felt herself drawn to it nevertheless. ", "She passed it by in the afternoon when she arrived at the hotel and made her way toward it at the end of the day, just to smell the steam and to observe the noisy industry of the workers—mostly Chinese men who only glanced up at her when she wandered past, glanced up quickly and then looked away.", "\n\nShe had a mean and accurate version of the way they argued, which she had already performed for Sister Illuminata. ", "The nun had not been amused. \"", "Stay away from those men,\" Sister had told her. \"", "They'd as soon put a knife in you.\"", "\n\nThe job Mr. Tierney had found for her was in the tearoom, helping to serve three days a week, from two in the afternoon to six in the evening. ", "It was the best he could get for her for now. ", "She wore a smart gray dress and a white apron, a cap and a hairnet and solid black shoes, and the outfit, given to her in the basement locker room where the workers gathered and dressed, immediately told her everything she needed to know about how to behave upstairs. ", "She was a quick study, the supervisor said. ", "A lovely girl.", "\n\nMornings, she waited on the steps of Mrs. Costello's apartment house.", "\n\nWhen the Sister arrived, Sally followed her up the stairs, then made herself useful in the neat and barren household, and then lingered after the Sister's work was done, keeping Mrs. Costello company through those lonely hours of the late morning and early afternoon, the hours that filled her with such fear.", "\n\nHours during which Mrs. Costello chatted aimlessly, sometimes scolded her, sometimes drifted to sleep in her chair by the window.", "\n\nOn those days, while Mrs. Costello dozed in the silence that followed the Sister's busy presence, the small apartment filled with an awful light—the color of bile. ", "Wherever Sally's eyes fell, there was something to make her shudder. ", "Mr. Costello's hairbrush on his dresser, threaded with his dull black hair. ", "A poorly tatted bureau scarf Mrs. Costello had made at the Sisters' urging: work for idle hands. ", "The wedding picture. ", "A dark sock turned in on itself, forgotten beneath the nightstand—was its partner beneath her mother's bed? ", "The man's underpants and long johns—she opened drawers while Mrs. Costello slept—and handkerchiefs tucked into neat rows, a worn missal placed among them. ", "The dresser itself was stained a dark, nearly black, mahogany, but the interior of each drawer was pale, startlingly pale—like something you should turn your eyes from—and redolent of fresh-cut wood. ", "Her nightgowns and stockings and underclothes carefully folded. ", "A marriage license in a brown envelope. ", "Twenty years they had been married. ", "Mrs. Costello's baptismal certificate from St. Charles. ", "She was forty-two years old. ", "A cemetery deed for Holy Cross Cemetery in Brooklyn. ", "A paper, many times folded, and with a gold seal like something from a classroom, that said Mr. Costello was a citizen of the United States.", "\n\nThe man's trousers and shirts were in the small closet. ", "Mrs. Costello's few dresses hung beside them. ", "Her two felt hats on the shelf above, side by side with his straw boater and a fedora—further proof, if any was needed, that these two were husband and wife.", "\n\nMr. Costello's white milkman's jacket, once, on a hook behind the bedroom door—it was slumped at the shoulders, collar raised, as if the man himself had turned from her, his head hung in shame.", "\n\nWhat Sally knew of the physical relations between men and women in those days was vague enough, only words—hastily spoken—when her mother told her \"what she needed to know.\" ", "Only the words some girls at school, and the rough boys who shouted in the street, had added to that mix. ", "Penis. ", "Backside. ", "Tush. ", "Bowels. ", "Down below. ", "The writhing pinky of the woman on the train.", "\n\nWhen she was young, she had caught, now and then, and only for the short time it took her mother to hurry her past, a man—drunk, her mother always said—holding himself and splashing his water in the street. ", "She had glimpsed last summer as she followed Sister Lucy more bare flesh than she had ever seen before—backsides and limbs and breasts and chests, baby boys with pink tulip bulbs between their legs, old ladies plucked hairless, their privates as puckered as their toothless mouths. ", "She gathered that an odd magnetism drew human eyes to even the palest, the foulest, the saddest of uncovered skin. ", "Sister Lucy, giving a sponge bath to an old man, running a soapy cloth over a wretched turkey neck pillowed on two bloated sacks the color of a bruise, shouted, \"Turn away,\" when she saw Sally gaping. \"", "This is not a sight for you.\"", "\n\nBut what she could not understand was how that strange magnetism accounted for what went on between her mother and Mr. Costello in the bedroom that used to be her own. ", "How it—\"a hunger,\" Sister Illuminata said—was enough to allow her mother to choose this milkman, to call him \"dear,\" to live in what the Sisters, who even now were mostly tight-lipped about the situation, knew was mortal sin.", "\n\nHer mother lived in mortal sin, skimmed the precipice of perdition with every step she took, every breath. ", "Down the stairs she went in the morning, alone now, out into the teeming street, trolleys and trucks, cars veering, mad strangers jostling her at every corner, and no daughter beside her to serve as extra eyes. ", "This was how her dangerous days now ran. ", "Over to the convent, down another set of stairs. ", "Furnace moaning. ", "Mangle rattling. ", "And what if fire or flood should trap her there? ", "Boiled water scald her? ", "What if the poison on Sister Illuminata's shelves should find its way into her tea? ", "Or pneumonia, tuberculosis, flu, transfer itself to her lungs from the putrid wash water of a dying woman's linen? ", "And the days growing darker now. ", "And the way home sometimes slick with rain. ", "The stolen afternoon with Mr. Costello, ham and eggs and the tumbled bed in the cold and waning light, black sin upon black sin. ", "And then the long night with no one else in the apartment—did her mother check that the oven was turned off, as they always used to do when Sally was young, because of Jim? ", "Was she careful stepping down from the chair when she reached up to the transom above the door? ", "Would anyone hear her if she cried out in the night, clutching her heart?", "\n\nThe devil waited at her mother's heels, his pointed fingertips rimmed with grime, waited to catch her as she moved through her dangerous days, a fruit ripe for the plucking (she had heard the expression in a sermon once). ", "Her mother was in a state of mortal sin, and if she were to die now, nothing would keep her from falling forever into the devil's arms.", "\n\nAnd what then of Jim, Sally thought—as if devising an argument no one had asked her to deliver—Jim, who waited for her in heaven?", "\n\nNothing to keep her mother from perdition except, perhaps—perhaps—the indulgence earned for her by her good daughter, swallowing her panic and her pride, her desire to be anywhere else (an urge that made her nerves coil and twitch), in order to remain with Mrs. Costello in her lonely late-morning hours, listening to her nonsense, absorbing her scorn, watching these spare and empty rooms—the heart of her own troubles—fill up with mid-morning light that was the color of urine, the color of bile.", "\n\nThe situation was clear: her mother would not change her ways. ", "Mr. Costello was her \"dear,\" and even the Sisters seemed helpless before her blithe determination to keep him. ", "Someone had to do penance for her, for the sin she would not give up. ", "Who else but the daughter who loved her above everything?", "\n\nThe nun who was here this morning, Sister Aquina, had left Mrs. Costello in her chair, wrapped tightly in Mr. Costello's woolen dressing gown. ", "She'd told Sally to be sure she didn't throw it off. ", "Mrs. Costello was chilled and running a fever, Sister Aquina had said. ", "Sally watched the nun stir cream of tartar into Mrs. Costello's morning tea—to help with the constipation, Sister Aquina explained. ", "And then the nun placed a flannel soaked in linseed oil on the woman's chest. ", "Before she left the apartment, Sister ground two aspirins with a mortar and pestle and instructed Sally to mix them into some of the applesauce she'd brought from the convent so that Mrs. Costello in her weakened state would not have to struggle to swallow them whole. \"", "Just the smooth part of the applesauce, please,\" Sister Aquina said. \"", "Not the chunks and peels.\"", "\n\nSister Aquina was a short, fat tomboy of a nun, with the broad face and the matter-of-fact authority of a cop on the street. ", "Her small black eyes were slightly crossed. ", "She was new to the convent, and so she assumed that Sally came to Mrs. Costello's apartment every morning to learn something about nursing.", "\n\n\"What we want to avoid in these cases is aspiration,\" she said. ", "She was spooning applesauce into a teacup, and then fishing out myopic Mrs. Odette's famous bits of peel. \"", "And I don't mean aspiring to find yourself a good-looking husband,\" she added. ", "She laughed at her joke, knowing nothing of Sally's situation. ", "Seeing only her willingness to serve. \"", "We want to be careful that our patient doesn't get food in her windpipe, doesn't choke and breathe it in. ", "Aspirate.\" ", "Sister Aquina traced a line down her bib, to her dark tunic, indicating her own lungs by drawing a circle under her shapeless breast. \"", "That's how infection can set in. ", "Lung infection. ", "Pneumonia. ", "We don't want that.\"", "\n\nSister Aquina did not stay long. ", "It was late January. ", "All the Sisters were busy in this frozen season. ", "With her cloak on, she put a hand to Sally's arm, moved her head as if to catch the girl fully with her disparate eyes. \"", "Aren't you good?\" ", "she said, standing at the apartment door. \"", "To be here like this.\"", "\n\nAnd Sally bowed her head in the old way—the way she might have accepted the praise last year, before her trip to Chicago—as if Sister Aquina's ignorance of the situation, of the penance Sally was doing and the circumstance that required it, had restored her innocence. ", "As if Sister Aquina's ignorance made Sally's goodness, her work of mercy, uncomplicated once more.", "\n\nWhile Mrs. Costello napped in her chair, her breaths uneven, tangled with phlegm, Sally made another circuit of the cramped bedroom. ", "The air in the room was a dirty yellow, the ceiling marred by mustard-colored water stains, the seams of the faded wallpaper grown pale brown. ", "Behind the drawn lace curtains, the shades were the brittle color of old paper. ", "The constant hiss and rattle of the radiator was like the gurgle of muddy street water going down a rusted drain.", "\n\nSally walked quietly around the bed, which Sister Aquina had left neatly made, around the narrow hope chest at its foot. ", "Casually, she paused to open the chest a few inches—a breath of cedar, the glimpse of folded linen—and then closed it again when she heard Mrs. Costello stir.", "\n\nShe walked to the dresser. ", "The two china-faced dolls were slumped together. ", "They wore similar dresses, long-sleeved and full-skirted, yellowed lace at the neck and sleeve and a vague stripe woven into the faded fabric, one blue, one purple. ", "The doll in the purple dress had an eye pushed back into its skull. ", "The faces of both were shattered with small cracks. ", "Sally picked up the purple one and was surprised to find that its limbs were heavy with sawdust or sand.", "\n\nSomething of Mrs. Costello herself in the doll's limp weight.", "\n\nIt occurred to Sally, just out of her own girlhood, that with only the slightest act of imagination she could bring the doll to life—poor thing, sweetly smiling, lonely here with her sister on the shelf. ", "But some distaste, for the age of the doll, for the rolled-back eye, made her resist her own girlish impulse to animate the thing, to offer it her sympathy.", "\n\n\"Put that down,\" Mrs. Costello said. ", "Her voice, weakly petulant, was full of congestion. \"", "That's not yours.\"", "\n\nSally returned the doll to the dresser. \"", "It must have been yours,\" she said, approaching Mrs. Costello in her chair, \"when you were a little girl.\"", "\n\nMrs. Costello began to struggle out of her dressing gown, pulling at the lapels, reaching for the flannel on her chest. \"", "I'm hot,\" she said. \"", "Take this off me.\"", "\n\nSally moved to stay her hand. ", "Over these many weeks of sitting with Mrs. Costello, the nuns had taught her that the woman was as easily distracted as a child. \"", "They're such pretty dolls,\" Sally said, moving Mrs. Costello's hand away from the dressing gown. ", "She was aware of the thin wedding band, the bird bones of her pale fingers and arms, her flat, narrow chest under the thick gown and the heavily oiled cloth.", "\n\nMrs. Costello looked up at Sally. ", "The tiny veins that fed her pale eyelids were vivid. \"", "Those were my mother's dolls,\" she said softly. \"", "She gave them to me.\"", "\n\n\"Is your mother alive?\" ", "Sally asked, and heard herself imitating the voice of the dirty woman on the train. ", "Imitating her pretend refinement. ", "Butter wouldn't melt in her mouth. ", "She blushed at her own phony pleasantries.", "\n\nMrs. Costello shook her head. \"", "Rheumatic fever,\" she said. \"", "I had it, too, but my mother died of it. ", "I was only thirteen.\"", "\n\n\"I'm sorry,\" Sally said.", "\n\n\"After,\" Mrs. Costello went on, whining, complaining, \"I couldn't go to school again. ", "Couldn't sit still. ", "Always walking. ", "Saint Vitus Dance. ", "My father grew so weary of it all, he tied me to a chair.\" ", "She whimpered a little. \"", "What else was the poor man to do?\"", "\n\n\"And you never went back to school?\" ", "Sally asked.", "\n\n\"I couldn't sit still,\" Mrs. Costello said impatiently, aware that she was repeating herself, that Sally had been inattentive. \"", "Even the nuns couldn't get me to sit still. ", "I'd walk and walk until the neighbors banged on the ceiling.\" ", "And then she pulled at the lapels of her dressing gown once again, and Sally once again stayed her hand.", "\n\n\"What's the use?\" ", "Mrs. Costello said, her attention fading from the struggle. ", "Her eyes went vacantly to the window. ", "She shifted in her seat.", "\n\n\"I have a pain,\" she said softly, her eyes without focus. \"", "I'm in pain.\"", "\n\nSally said, as any one of the Sisters would have said, \"I know.\" ", "It was a familiar call and response. ", "Nothing else to be done, the Sisters had told her. ", "Nothing to be done for an imaginary pain, for a woman touched in the brain; a woman determined to take to her bed. \"", "But you got better,\" Sally said, aiming to distract her. \"", "You got over the Saint Vitus Dance. ", "You got married.\"", "\n\nMrs. Costello seemed to consider this. ", "Then she nodded, as if it took some effort to recall. \"", "I did. ", "I got better. ", "I married the milkman. ", "He came to the door and my father said, 'You're welcome to her.'\"", "\n\nMrs. Costello nearly smiled. ", "Sister Aquina had parted the woman's hair neatly this morning, had fixed two tight braids that fell over the shoulders of the brown robe. ", "The braids made her look like a young girl—there was some trace of a delicate beauty. \"", "We were married on December 8,\" she said, and coughed. \"", "In the Church of St. Peter and St. Paul,\" and then coughed with more vigor, making her chair shake. ", "Sally put her hand on one of the wheels to keep the chair from rolling. \"", "It was a very cold day,\" Mrs. Costello said, coughing through the words. \"", "I was very happy.\"", "\n\nWhen the fit had passed, Mrs. Costello went limp, as if her arms and legs were weighted with sand. ", "She dropped her chin, let her hands fall to her sides, and cast her eyes out over her thin lap in a wide and empty stare.", "\n\nSally had seen some of the more impatient nuns slap Mrs. Costello's hand when this happened. ", "Some would shake her shoulder and call out her name.", "\n\n\"None of your nonsense, now,\" Sister Lucy would cry.", "\n\nAnd always Mrs. Costello would quickly revive. ", "Proof, perhaps, that the fit was a sham.", "\n\nBut today Sally waited in silence, a little afraid, but also curious about how long this vacancy would last. ", "A few minutes, it turned out, although they were long, silent minutes, filled only with the sound of the hissing radiator and the traffic in the street, the faint trill of pigeons at the window. ", "Mrs. Costello slowly raised her head again and her eyes regained their focus.", "\n\n\"I am abandoned and alone,\" she said.", "\n\nThere was mucus bubbling in her nose.", "\n\n\"Let me get you a handkerchief,\" Sally said softly.", "\n\nShe went to the dresser and took out one of Mr. Costello's fresh handkerchiefs, ironed by Sister Illuminata. ", "She held it to the woman's nose, held the back of Mrs. Costello's head as her own mother used to do when she said, \"Blow.\" ", "Mrs. Costello sputtered into the cloth, childish herself in the way she took Sally's wrist in both hands as she did so. ", "The handkerchief filled with a wet warmth. ", "Sally wiped the woman's nose and folded the cloth over. ", "Mr. Costello's initials were embroidered in one corner. ", "Her mother's neat stitches.", "\n\nIt occurred to Sally that she and Mrs. Costello both were left out—left alone and abandoned—by the alliance Mr. Costello and her mother had made.", "\n\nImpulsively, she bent and put her lips to Mrs. Costello's neat part. ", "The woman's unwashed scalp was hot, the unnatural heat of a fever. ", "The smell of linseed rose from under her clothes.", "\n\nFor a moment, Mrs. Costello sat still and uncomplaining under the caress.", "\n\nAs Sally straightened up again, she saw a pigeon's shadow pass across the shade, behind the lace. ", "She thought of her own sacrifice, her work of mercy flying to heaven to repair her mother's sin.", "\n\nAnd then Mrs. Costello's belly rumbled and she gave up some gas.", "\n\n\"Take me to the toilet,\" she cried. \"", "Hurry up.\"", "\n\nMoving quickly, Sally backed the wheelchair away from the window and maneuvered it to the wooden commode, even as Mrs. Costello told her again to hurry, struggling to stand on her one good foot, disrupting the journey rather than aiding it. ", "Once they were beside the bowl, Sally took the woman's elbow, helped her up, then stooped to grab the hem of the dressing gown. ", "As she leaned down, her ear at the woman's waist, Mrs. Costello struck her back, saying, \"Hurry, you, hurry.\" ", "Sally gathered up the heavy dressing gown and the flannel nightdress, raising both above the woman's knees. ", "The crossed scars at the base of Mrs. Costello's amputated leg, the gross marks of the stitches, shone like silver. ", "The flesh was puckered at the center, turned in like a balled sock. ", "The bulk of the dressing gown was difficult to handle. ", "It slipped once or twice as Sally tried to gather it up, and then the nightdress slipped down as well. ", "Leaning into Mrs. Costello's reeking chest, wrapping her arms around her thin frame, Sally managed to gather the skirts of both the dressing gown and the nightgown at the woman's back, above her pale backside. ", "She maneuvered the woman on her one, hopping leg. ", "Mrs. Costello sat with a small crash and voided—Sally turned her face away from the smell and the sputter of it, still holding Mrs. Costello's gathered nightclothes just behind her.", "\n\nMrs. Costello sat, slump-shouldered. \"", "Sorry,\" she said. ", "And then grunted softly, pushing out another splash of urine and foul air.", "\n\nSally wiped Mrs. Costello's pale bottom quickly, holding her breath, nearly bursting into tears herself when the rough paper broke and the wet feces streaked her fingers. ", "She swatted at the mess on her hand with more paper, and then, not gently, stood the woman up, brushed down her skirts, and again guided her back into the chair, holding her breath all the while. ", "She returned the chair to its place before the window.", "\n\nShe wanted only to flee. ", "To plunge her fingers into a bowl of bleach.", "\n\n\"I'll just go clean myself up,\" Sally said. \"", "Then I'll bring you some broth.\"", "\n\nMrs. Costello was reaching into her nightgown, pulling at the cloth Sister Aquina had made.", "\n\n\"Empty the commode first,\" she said. ", "Her chin was raised—it made her seem haughty. ", "She was pulling up the sodden cloth, hand over hand. ", "When she had freed it from her dressing gown, she put the limp flannel to her nose and then disdainfully dropped it on the floor beside her chair. ", "Sister Aquina's kind attention.", "\n\nThen Mrs. Costello pulled the lapels of the dressing gown back up around her neck and said regally, \"Don't leave that mess in here.\"", "\n\nThe dog—in this telling there was only one of them—got hold of her skirt, and when she tried to pull it from his jaw, he nipped her hand. ", "She gave him a good kick and was turning to get away when he caught her foot. ", "She cried out and struck him on the head and—snap snap, she said—he had hold of her ankle, her calf. ", "She cried out again, falling into a pole, scraping her face, her poor cheek, she said, against the rough wood, but holding on to it for dear life as the dog tried to pull her down. ", "She heard the women in the street come running. ", "Shouting from the apartments above. ", "A man in shirtsleeves and suspenders picked up a plank—the yard was a mess of junk—and threw it at the dog. ", "Lifted her. ", "All these years later she remembered his strong arms.", "\n\nIn her wheelchair by the window, Mrs. Costello began to cry again.", "\n\nHe carried her home, this man, jostling her raw cheek against his suspenders. ", "Her stockings were soaked with blood. ", "Her shoe was gone. ", "A rush of women with towels and aprons followed them, they surrounded her in her own place. ", "Linen tea towels and aprons of cambric and rough calico, a box of sterile cotton from somewhere. ", "They tore off her stocking. ", "The flesh was swollen and oozing, blood everywhere. ", "The cotton sticking to her wounds. ", "Someone fetched a basin. ", "Someone poured peroxide from a bottle, and she howled. ", "The marks foamed and flamed.", "\n\n\"That's old news,\" Sally said softly. \"", "Let's talk of something pleasant for a change.\" ", "The bowl of broth, grown cold, was on her lap.", "\n\nMrs. Costello shook her head. ", "The leg throbbed, she said. ", "Throbbed and throbbed. ", "When her husband came home, he fell on his knees beside the couch where she lay. ", "There were still a number of women in the room. ", "They told him to leave it be, the bandaged leg. ", "They swatted him away with their towels and aprons. ", "The leg throbbed and throbbed and swelled up against the bandages made of torn rags. ", "Swelled up like baking bread. ", "Green pus oozed. ", "The bandages darkened. ", "Her toes grew black. ", "The women flew about the room.", "\n\nEarly one morning, her husband lifted her, carried her downstairs. ", "The milk cart was in front of the door. ", "He put her on the seat. ", "A stream of neighbors following, drawn by her cries of pain and humiliation.", "\n\nWhen her husband brought her home again, he wheeled her through the streets in this very chair.", "\n\nSally knew Mrs. Costello's moods. ", "Sometimes the tale of her catastrophe caused her to flatten her lips against her teeth in bitter anger. ", "Sometimes, as now, retelling the tale merely made her weep. ", "Sometimes it was the neighborhood women she condemned. ", "Sometimes it was her husband's fault for standing back when they admonished him. ", "Sometimes she shook her head in sympathy and called him a good, unfortunate man—it was the doctors who cut off her leg without so much as a by-your-leave who were to blame. ", "Sometimes there was only her seething humiliation that he had taken her to the hospital in a milk cart.", "\n\nOn this afternoon, Sally recalled Sister Lucy saying that if that dog had been drowned as a pup, still Mrs. Costello would have found an excuse. ", "She had married without knowing the duties of married life. ", "Duties, Sally knew, her own mother understood. ", "Perhaps relished.", "\n\nAnd there was some confused pride in this for the girl—another indication of her mother's power, her endless expertise.", "\n\n\"Whose yard was it, where you found the dog?\" ", "she asked. ", "The boredom and lethargy of these long hours was in her voice. ", "She planned to repeat Sister Lucy's taut reply: You should have minded your own business.", "\n\nMrs. Costello waved her hands. ", "Sally saw that she had not resettled the woman's clothes as neatly as the nuns would have done. ", "Her dressing gown was twisted about her thighs. \"", "I don't know whose yard it was,\" she said impatiently. \"", "Some woman was looking for a man—a man who had beaten a child, tied a child to a pole and whipped him good. ", "She and some others were on the street when I came along. ", "We all went looking into the yards. ", "But only I got bit.\"", "\n\n\"Too bad,\" Sally said. \"", "But you're better now.\"", "\n\nMrs. Costello looked at her. ", "That small, finely shattered face. \"", "Better?\" ", "Mrs. Costello asked. \"", "How?\"", "\n\nHer nose was running. ", "Sally put the bowl of broth on the dresser and stood to collect another handkerchief from Mr. Costello's drawer. \"", "How am I better?\" ", "Mrs. Costello called after her. \"", "Sitting here all alone day after day.\"", "\n\n\"I'm here,\" Sally said, returning. \"", "You're not alone.\" ", "She put the handkerchief to the woman's nose.", "\n\n\"Abandoned and alone,\" Mrs. Costello said beneath it. ", "And then, whining, \"I have a pain.\"", "\n\nSally folded the handkerchief, wiped at her face again. ", "She had a sudden impulse to stuff it into the woman's mouth.", "\n\n\"I know you do,\" she said dully. \"", "I know.\"", "\n\nMrs. Costello's troubles were endless. ", "The care of her was endless.", "\n\nSally took the bowl of broth from the dresser. ", "The two balled handkerchiefs, full of snot, the yellow towel soaked in linseed, were still on the floor around her. ", "There was straightening up to do. ", "There were still hours to go before she could leave for her shift in the tearoom.", "\n\nMrs. Costello squirmed in her chair, broke wind, coughed delicately.", "\n\nShe seemed on the verge of tears again, but then her gaze turned to the window, to the bright cold light of the late morning, and she sank once more into that wide and vacant stare. ", "Sally listened to the traffic in the street. ", "Heard a brush of wind against the building. ", "Her legs and arms ached with the impulse, electric, insistent, to flee. ", "Her own Saint Vitus Dance. \"", "I'm going to leave now,\" she said.", "\n\nShe went quickly to the kitchen. ", "In the sink, a cockroach darted into the drain, and she poured what remained of the broth after it. ", "In her own household, her mother's household, lost to her now, no food was ever left out in the open, uncovered, but still Sally left the pot with the nuns' soup on the stove. ", "Why shouldn't Mr. Costello clean it up when he came home, his stomach filled with her mother's ham and eggs and toast and tea? ", "Why shouldn't he care for his own wife?", "\n\nShe left the unwashed bowl in the sink. ", "Took her coat from the chair in the living room and slipped it on. ", "Put on her hat and her gloves, and saw as she did how her hands were shaking.", "\n\nMrs. Costello called from the bedroom, \"Are you there?\" ", "Sally could hear the mucus in her voice. ", "The woman coughed and then asked again, beginning to cry, \"Is anyone there?\" ", "She let out a single moan—childish, despairing, startling in its sudden volume—and then said, angrily, all to herself, \"Damn them to hell.\"", "\n\nSally slipped out the door. \"", "I'll be back tomorrow, Mrs. Costello,\" she called weakly, understanding the woman couldn't hear her at all.", "\n\nGaining the cold street, Sally felt the weight of her desertion. ", "She had failed in her fine intentions once again. ", "It was like a thumb pressed into her chest, a smudged shadow on her soul. ", "She breathed deeply, as if to dislodge the discomfort. ", "The winter sun, bouncing off windshields and tenement windows and pale brick, made her squint. ", "But it was delightful, nonetheless, to walk unencumbered in the cold air. ", "To be out of that stifling room.", "\n\nAnd then she remembered the aspirin Sister Aquina had left, for the woman's fever. ", "To be stirred into Mrs. Odette's applesauce, the smooth part of it, anyway. ", "She thought of the heat that had risen from Mrs. Costello's scalp. ", "It was an unnatural heat, the sickroom heat of a fever. ", "She imagined how it might continue to burn as Mrs. Costello sat in her chair, crying out uselessly, her temperature rising and rising, sweat running down her small face, mixing with the mucus that covered her lips. ", "She imagined the sound of her voice tangled with phlegm.", "\n\nAnd Sister Aquina returning to the apartment, or perhaps Mr. Costello himself, to find cockroaches in a black line across white enamel of the stovetop. ", "Mrs. Costello lifeless in her chair, her face scorched.", "\n\nSally reached the hotel two hours early for her shift. ", "She used the service entrance and took the stairs down to the locker room, but then went the long way around, through the basement labyrinth. ", "She could feel the change in the air—scent of bleach, a touch of steam—as she approached the wide doors of the laundry. ", "The humid air throbbed with the banging of the machines. ", "After the cold outside, the sudden heat made her fingers burn inside her gloves. ", "She pulled them off. ", "The big steel doors of the laundry were open, thrown back against the tile walls. ", "She walked past. ", "Inside, the men in their white clothes were busy with their work, pushing baskets, loading sheets into the big machines. ", "They all seemed the same size and shape. ", "Some wore white brimless caps. ", "Two or three had long black braids down their backs. ", "There were four large steam presses on the far side of the room, the size of gray coffins. ", "They belched steam in a way that made the workers surrounding them seem, briefly, to disappear. ", "There were two ironing tables, with men—she still thought this a comical sight—wielding large electric irons whose cords ran upward, to the ceiling.", "\n\nShe stepped inside. ", "Ordinarily, she would just walk past, glance in, breathe the familiar air, gather the details to bring back to the convent—how many sheets did they wash in a day, how many towels and tablecloths, Sister Illuminata loved to speculate—but today she stepped over the threshold. ", "One of the Chinese men looked up immediately, shouted something over the din, and waved her away. ", "She grinned back at him, but stayed where she was. ", "He shrugged and returned to his work. ", "She wondered if Sister was right. ", "Would they put a knife in her if they could? ", "What would her mother say then?", "\n\nTo her left there was a shelf, taller and longer than Sister Illuminata's but as well stocked as hers was with boxes of detergent and bottles of bleach, tubs of Borax and bluing and salt and lime. ", "A tiny skull and crossbones on a bottle of ammonia. ", "Sister Illuminata had called it the devil's mark when Sally was a child. ", "A way to scare her into keeping her hands off.", "\n\nSister's Illuminata's sainted mother, Sally knew, had once saved the life of a little boy, the child of another laundress. ", "The boy had swallowed a fistful of alum, and his silly mother, in her panic, had poured water down his throat. ", "The boy would have choked to death or drowned right there on dry land, Sister Illuminata said, if her own dear mother hadn't pushed the woman away and then reached her pinky into the boy's mouth, unstopping him.", "\n\nThat boy grew up to be a priest, Sister Illuminata always said at the end of this tale, well satisfied.", "\n\nImpulsively, Sally reached up and touched the devil's mark. ", "Again, one of the Chinese men shouted at her, waved her away with a towel as if she were a duck to be chased. ", "She pulled back her hand and noticed as she did a bit of brown grime beneath her fingernails. ", "She could smell Mrs. Costello's stink, even here, where the air was filled with soap and bleach.", "\n\nShe lifted the bottle of ammonia from the shelf and turned quickly, out the door, down the narrow hallway. ", "She went around a corner, through the door of the ladies' room the employees shared. ", "She put the stopper into one of the sinks and filled it with water as hot as it would run. ", "She poured the ammonia into it—the scent rising, stinging her sinuses. ", "Another tearoom girl, a broad, motherly sort, was at the other end of the washroom. ", "She wrinkled her nose as she approached the sink where Sally stood. ", "She asked, \"What's going on?\" ", "with a slow, bovine curiosity, and then watched open-mouthed as Sally plunged her hands into the water.", "\n\nIt wasn't hot enough to scald, but the ammonia burned her bitten cuticles and she gasped a little. ", "The smell of the ammonia was pricking her nose, crawling up into her eyes. ", "She turned her head, holding her breath, but kept her hands where they were.", "\n\n\"Is this a rule now?\" ", "the girl asked with a little more urgency. ", "She pinched her nose. ", "She wore her dark hair cut straight across her high forehead, which made her look stupid. \"", "Are they making us do this now?\"", "\n\nSally nodded and then, forced to exhale, laughed. ", "She said, yes, all the tearoom girls were now required to wash their hands in ammonia. ", "She said something about the health inspector. ", "She listened to herself tell this lie, amused, but not surprised, to find that she was capable of such a small cruelty. ", "She stirred her hands in the quickly cooling water. ", "Ran one nail under the other and stirred her hands again. \"", "There's a lot of sickness going around. ", "They want us to be careful.\"", "\n\nThe girl considered this. ", "She was a big girl with wide, droopy breasts beneath her street clothes, a woolen dress, an ill-fitting coat. ", "It occurred to Sally that she looked far better in her tearoom uniform, cleaner, even smarter, in her apron and her cap. ", "A face and body made for service.", "\n\nSally saw the girl eye what was left in the bottle of ammonia.", "\n\n\"Help yourself,\" Sally said.", "\n\nSide by side, the two of them bathed their hands, scooping up the sharply scented water and pouring it out again.", "\n\nTelling it later, our mother said, \"Like a pair of Pontius Pilates.\"", "\n\nIn the tearoom that afternoon, there was a lovely couple—a mother and a daughter. ", "They were conferring like businessmen about the daughter's wedding reception here at the hotel, come June. ", "The mother was an elegant lady with her veil drawn down over her eyes. ", "The daughter wore a lovely suit with wide white lapels and a cinched waist. ", "They both gave off a soft perfume. ", "They spoke together, heads bent: orange blossom, she heard them say, stephanotis, lilac, lily of the valley. ", "She heard them say June weather, vanilla cake, iced lemonade.", "\n\nWhen they were gone, Sally found a linen handkerchief beneath their table, neatly folded, of a pretty, pale violet shade. ", "It carried the women's perfume. ", "She put it in her purse.", "\n\nAs she changed out of her uniform at the end of her shift, she was still repeating the words in her head, like the refrain of a song, like the words of a prayer: stephanotis, lilac, iced lemonade.", "\n\nIt was dark and bitter cold when she returned to the street. ", "She had thrown her gloves away, and now she kept her raw hands plunged into her pockets, aware of the scent of ammonia that lingered on her skin.", "\n\nOrange blossom and lily of the valley. ", "Stephanotis. ", "Iced lemonade. ", "It occurred to her as she walked that if Mrs. Costello had died in her chair this afternoon, abandoned and alone, her mother and Mr. Costello would be free to marry. ", "Come June, perhaps.", "\nHoly\n\nMrs. Tierney said, \"Good for you,\" when Sally told her the next morning, through her bedroom door, that she was sleeping in. \"", "Sure the Sisters can get along fine without you. ", "Get your rest.\"", "\n\nLiz Tierney was happy to think that the girl was growing somewhat weary of all her good works: all the holiness and the loneliness and the sacrifice.", "\n\nMrs. Tierney understood only that Sally, having had a false start on her vocation, was once again spending her mornings following the nuns. ", "Getting her courage up to try again. ", "The estrangement between her and her mother, Liz Tierney believed, was another matter altogether.", "\n\nOn the following morning, when Sally announced at breakfast that she would not be helping the nuns at all anymore, Mrs. Tierney smiled. ", "She told her own daughters, who were sitting right there with the girl at the kitchen table, that it was now their duty to make sure Sally had \"a little fun at last.\" ", "She said, sympathetic and forgiving, \"It's an awful lot they ask of you, the Sisters. ", "It's a difficult life.\" ", "She said, \"God's not going to hold it against you if you're something less than a blessed saint. ", "Aren't we all human? ", "Aren't we all doing the best we can?\"", "\n\nElizabeth Tierney was full of admiration for the Sisters, who moved through the streets of the city in their black and white, doing good where it was needed, imposing good where they found it lacking.", "\n\nShe never failed to greet them as they passed—\"Good morning, Sisters,\" \"How are you, Sister?\"—or to put a penny or two in their baskets whenever she saw them begging. ", "And although she sympathized with Annie's disdain for the society ladies who raised money for the nuns, still Mrs. Tierney went to the bazaars and the card parties at the various convents and spent her husband's money lavishly on aprons and raffle tickets and crocheted blankets, for the sake of the Sisters.", "\n\nThe nuns did more good in the world than any lazy parish priest, she liked to say, especially in arguments with her husband, especially after he learned that she had squandered the week's household funds on euchre and bridge at some convent, or had given what he called \"more than their fair share\" to some plucky little Sister bound for pagan lands.", "\n\nThe priests were pampered momma's boys compared to these holy women, Liz Tierney would argue. \"", "Princes of the Church, my eye,\" she would say—if only to get his goat—\"Spoiled children they are. ", "It's the nuns who keep things running.\"", "\n\nLiz Tierney loved the nuns—adored them, she said—but she also harbored in her heart the belief that any woman who chose to spend a celibate life toiling for strangers was, by necessity, \"a little peculiar.\"", "\n\nMrs. Tierney was a devout Catholic, but the kind of Catholic, she knew, who preferred the noise and humidity of the street after mass to the cool dampness of the sacristy, preferred conversation to prayer, sunlight to flickering shadow.", "\n\nShe was a Catholic woman who was more moved by the miraculous blood that colored the cheeks of her six children as they fidgeted in the pew than she was by any injunction from the pulpit regarding the watery stuff that flowed from His pierced side for the salvation of all men.", "\n\nLiz Tierney had nothing against the salvation of all men. ", "She was as grateful for the fact of heaven as she was sure of her path toward it. ", "She counted the Blessed Mother as first among her confidantes. ", "She loved the order and the certainty the Church gave her life, arranging the seasons for her, the weeks and the days, guiding her philosophies and her sorrows. ", "She loved the hymns. ", "She loved the prayers. ", "She loved the way the Church—the priests and the Brothers and the nuns, as well as the handy threat of eternal damnation—ordered her disorderly children.", "\n\nBut holiness bored her.", "\n\nShe liked chaos, busyness, bustling. ", "She liked a household strewn with clothes and dust and magazines and books, jump ropes, baseball bats, milk bottles. ", "She liked the sight and the smell of overflowing ashtrays, of a man who's had a few drinks, of tabletops crowded with cloudy glasses. ", "She loved falling into an unmade bed at the end of the long day, falling in beside her snoring husband—with maybe a child or two snagged in the covers—and never reaching, because sleep overtook her, the part of the Hail Mary that said: _Now and at the hour of our death._", "\n\nIt was at the end of everything the Church had to say, in her opinion: Death was. ", "And while she understood the need and logic of this, she had never found the subject of much interest.", "\n\nQuoting her, our father sometimes said, \"Isn't it funny how we all die at the same time? ", "Always at the end of our lives. ", "Why worry?\"", "\n\nLiz Tierney preferred the bright distractions of living. ", "She liked a good fight. ", "She liked a long talk with plenty of gossip in it. ", "She liked her husband when his passions were at high tide, and her children when they were rocking the boat: running, or laughing, full of outrage, full of schemes. ", "She liked the sound of many voices in her house—liked it better still when they rose in a chorus of song. ", "She liked stories of sin far better than tales of virtue. ", "She liked the salty taste of contradiction on her tongue. ", "She hated idleness. ", "And long silences. ", "She hated to see anyone doing anything alone.", "\n\nWhen Sister Lucy appeared at her door for the second time in nearly twenty years, Sally all bedraggled beside her, not gone to the convent after all, Mrs. Tierney was quietly delighted by the news of Annie's stolen afternoons—with the milkman, no less.", "\n\n\"You spoke up,\" she wanted to tell her friend, spoke up against the lousy certainties life had given her: a husband dead, a daughter to raise alone, daily labor, daily loneliness, dull duty. ", "She said, in fact, when next she and Annie met, \"An hour or two of an afternoon isn't much of a sin.\"", "\n\nAnd so on the morning that Sally told her, still in her dressing gown and with the breakfast plates and cups and crusts still on the kitchen table, \"I'm not following the Sisters anymore,\" Mrs. Tierney could only smile. ", "It was a cold, dark morning and an icy rain was hitting the courtyard outside the window. ", "Liz Tierney was delighted to know that the girl wouldn't be going out into such weather, even to comfort the sick. \"", "Oh, it's nice to get up in the morning,\" Mrs. Tierney said, singing it, as she brewed another pot of tea. \"", "But it's nicer to stay in bed.\"", "\n\nAnd then, not two weeks later, Mrs. Costello came down with pneumonia and Mr. Costello decided to amend his life. ", "Annie told Liz Tierney this news without shedding a tear. ", "She seemed to love the man all the more for it. ", "He'd broken it off with her and then made a good confession, and, Annie said, \"That's that.\"", "\n\n\"And you?\" ", "Liz Tierney said. \"", "Have you made a good confession, too?\"", "\n\nAnnie hushed her—they were walking arm-in-arm through the cold and leafless park. ", "She said it was hardly a subject she would bring up in church, with a holy priest, no less. ", "Wouldn't the poor man die of embarrassment?", "\n\nThey leaned together, laughing. ", "But knowing, too, faithful as they were, that an immortal soul was at stake. \"", "You could make a quick confession,\" Liz told her. \"", "You wouldn't have to go into detail.\"", "\n\nBut Annie, stubborn, shook her head. \"", "There's not a thing I'm sorry for,\" she said.", "\n\nThat night, a wet night in early February, Sally came back to the Tierneys' after her shift at the hotel and went up to her room. ", "She and the twins were going to the movies in an hour. ", "She had barely taken off her shoes and stockings and was drying her hair with a towel when there was a light tap at the door. ", "Mrs. Tierney entered, and then closed the door behind her, leaning back against it, her hands on the doorknob behind her substantial hips. ", "Her cheeks were bright red, as if she had just come in from the cold herself.", "\n\n\"You should know,\" Mrs. Tierney said, without preliminaries, \"the situation has changed. ", "For your mother.\" ", "She studied Sally, as if to see if there was more she needed to say. ", "She seemed briefly disappointed to find there was. \"", "She no longer has her visitor. ", "His wife is ill. ", "He believes that's where his duty lies.\" ", "And then she raised her eyebrows to say, Do you understand me now? ", "And then smiled in relief as if Sally had actually said, I understand.", "\n\nIn fact, Sally said nothing at all.", "\n\nMrs. Tierney straightened up, brought her hands forward, drying them, although they were not wet, on her apron. \"", "You are always welcome here, of course,\" she said. \"", "You can stay as long as you like. ", "But no one would wonder if you want to leave us now to go back to your own place.\"", "\n\nShe smoothed her apron over her skirt, her voice taut with the emotion she could not conceal. \"", "Your mother is there by herself now,\" she said. \"", "Entirely alone.\"", "\nStill\n\nThe lamps were all on in Mrs. Costello's apartment, although daylight was at the bedroom window. ", "A funereal hush about the place as the two nuns—Sister Jeanne and Sister Lucy today—bustled silently about. ", "Sister Jeanne was putting the clean laundry in drawers and cupboards when Sally arrived. ", "Sister Lucy was just turning from Mrs. Costello in the bed, her stethoscope around her neck, black against her silver cross and her white bib. ", "Mrs. Costello's small face was wan. ", "She was, Sister Lucy told Sister Jeanne, \"weak as a kitten.\" ", "In the corner by the window, there was a bullet-shaped oxygen tank beside a folded oxygen tent that was ghostly pale.", "\n\nSister Lucy glanced up at Sally as she stood in the door of Mrs. Costello's bedroom, and then she said, indifferently, \"Good. ", "You're here.\"", "\n\nShe brushed down her sleeve with her crooked hand. ", "Then reached into her pocket for her wristwatch on its worn leather strap. \"", "All right, I'm off,\" she said. ", "She took Sally by the arm and steered her out of the room. \"", "Are you here for the duration or just stopping in?\" ", "she asked. ", "Her eyes were moving and her mouth indicated that she was already certain no answer would satisfy. \"", "Because I've been told you've abandoned this particular work of mercy,\" she went on, \"which is fine, you're not obliged. ", "You were never obliged to be here. ", "But Jeanne's exhausted. ", "She could use some help until Mr. Costello gets home. ", "The missus is recovering, but slowly.\" ", "She squinted a bit from the distance of her bonnet. \"", "Mr. Costello will be home as soon as he can get here. ", "Every morning now. ", "Do you hear what I'm saying?\"", "\n\nSally said, \"I know.\"", "\n\nSister reached for her cloak, which was still damp and sparkling with the morning's rain. ", "She swept the cloak over her shoulder, the stethoscope around her neck, tangled now with the chain of her cross. \"", "Mrs. Costello will live,\" she said, as if she were merely ticking off the day's obligations. \"", "Her husband will mend his ways.\" ", "She smiled her thin-lipped smile, reaching back to adjust her veil. \"", "I've never believed our God is a bargaining God, but men do. ", "It's nonsense. ", "While he was praying for her to live, she was praying to die. ", "Which one of them struck the bargain?\"", "\n\nSister Lucy sniffed disdainfully. \"", "We kept her alive,\" she said. \"", "God knows it.\"", "\n\nNow she pulled off the stethoscope and stashed it angrily, as was her ordinary way, into her little black bag. \"", "Mr. Costello returns around ten. ", "Eleven at the latest. ", "No one will blame you if you don't want to run into him. ", "But stay a while and let Sister Jeanne catch her breath.\"", "\n\nShe lifted her bag, looked around the room. \"", "Take a dust rag to those lampshades,\" she went on, \"and to the baseboards. ", "There's bread and butter in the kitchen. ", "Some boiled eggs, applesauce. ", "Get Jeanne to eat something, too. ", "And put the kettle on. ", "Bring them both a nice cup of tea. ", "Fortify it with plenty of milk and sugar.\" ", "And then Sister Lucy was out the door.", "\n\nSally still wore her coat and hat, and her pocketbook was still on her arm. ", "She stood in the room, briefly uncertain. ", "The nuns had the two lamps turned on and the light in the kitchen as well. ", "New, if gray and muted, sunlight was streaming into the bedroom from the one window. ", "It was nearly 7 a.m. The radiator against the far wall was hissing and ticking, but the draft left by Sister Lucy's exit swept the room, hollowing out the warmth. ", "Sally shivered. ", "In her purse was the violet handkerchief she had picked up from the floor of the tearoom. ", "Tied into it, like a hobo's pack, was a good handful of alum.", "\n\nSally put her purse on the slipcovered chair. ", "She took off her coat and her hat and placed them over it. ", "Then she went into the kitchen to put the kettle on for tea. ", "While it boiled, she went back to the living room and picked up her purse. ", "Now she put it on the small kitchen table. ", "She set out on the counter two of Mrs. Costello's teacups, spooned tea into the silver tea ball, and placed it inside the tin pot. ", "When the water boiled, she poured it in. ", "She went to her purse, easily found the violet handkerchief.", "\n\nShe untied the knot and shook the alum into the empty cup. ", "She poured the tea over it and immediately the water grew cloudy. ", "The faint odor that arose was redolent of Sister's Immaculate's laundry. ", "She added sugar and milk and then tasted the mixture from the spoon. ", "There was the bitter sharpness of what was not tea. ", "In the cupboard over the sink, Mr. Costello kept a bottle of whiskey. ", "Sally had seen it before. ", "Quickly she reached up for the bottle and poured a splash into the tea, briefly recalling the Bronx girl on the train. ", "She tied up the handkerchief again and returned it to her purse. ", "She snapped the purse closed, and the sound of the lock reverberated. ", "It echoed, she was certain.", "\n\nShe carried the teacup on its saucer, the spoon rattling, into the bedroom. ", "Mrs. Costello was propped in the bed as she had been. ", "Sister Jeanne was taking her pulse.", "\n\n\"Sister Lucy said to bring her some tea,\" Sally whispered. \"", "There's some waiting for you in the kitchen, too.\" ", "She kept her hand over the cup, as if to contain the scent of what she had done. ", "She felt her palm grow damp with steam. ", "There was something painful rising to her throat. ", "She knew she could always drop the cup. ", "Mrs. Costello's eyes fluttered open, that meaningless blue of them. \"", "I don't want it,\" she whispered. \"", "Go away.\" ", "She coughed weakly and tried to move down into the bed.", "\n\nSister Jeanne was adjusting the pillows behind her head. \"", "It's better for your lungs if you can sit up a bit, dear,\" she said gently. ", "Sally could tell Sister Jeanne had said this many times before. \"", "I know you are tired, Mrs. Costello, but it's better if you can give your lungs some room.\"", "\n\nMrs. Costello coughed again and then narrowed her eyes like an angry child. \"", "I'm tired of you,\" she said.", "\n\nSister Jeanne said, \"You're tired in general, Mrs. Costello. ", "A little tea. ", "Something to eat, and you'll start feeling stronger.\"", "\n\nShe signaled to Sally to come around the bed. \"", "Just a spoonful,\" she whispered. \"", "A spoonful at a time. ", "I'll bring some food.\"", "\n\nSally's hand was trembling as she held the cup, and the cup was rattling against the saucer. ", "The alum was at the bottom. ", "Her plan was to give Mrs. Costello some sips of liquid, and then to spoon up the wet alum from the bottom of the cup and fill her mouth with it. ", "Stop her throat with it. ", "Stop her breath.", "\n\nHer plan was to exchange her own immortal soul for her mother's mortal happiness.", "\n\nIt was a ridiculous plan. ", "Even this far along, she knew it was ridiculous. ", "She knew it was ridiculous when she first conceived of it—walking home from the hotel on that bitter night, thinking lilac and stephanotis, a wedding in June, and considering how only a miserable woman, blood and stink and complaint, bird bones and pale skin, stood in the way of her mother's happiness, her mother's place in heaven.", "\n\nShe knew it was ridiculous just yesterday when she coaxed Sister Illuminata up the stairs for the three o'clock prayers. (\"", "Wouldn't you rather pray in the chapel, Sister?\" ", "she had asked. ", "Butter wouldn't melt in her mouth. \"", "How long has it been since you've spent the afternoon hour away from your ironing board?\") ", "And then filled the violet handkerchief with Sister's alum—meant, Sally knew, for making flameproof the nuns' veils, the donated infant clothes, the kitchen curtains. ", "Telling herself all the while her plan was ridiculous. ", "She would never do it. ", "Never find the nerve.", "\n\nAnd then waking so early this morning in her bed in the Tierney house. ", "The mad sounds of the morning routine echoing through the walls. ", "Feet pounding on the stairs and Mr. Tierney pounding on the bathroom door. ", "The girls complaining they needed to get in there, too. ", "A refrain of \"Can I wear your . . . ", "Can I borrow . . .\" ", "passed among the four of them. ", "And Patrick calling to Michael, and Mrs. Tierney calling to the twins. ", "Mr. Tierney singing wordlessly in his lovely baritone as he passed her doorway, going down the hall. ", "The whistle of the kettle and the snap crack of bacon frying in the pan. ", "Toast burning. ", "And smelling again that moment when she believed, stupid and dumbfounded but, still, full of belief, that her father had returned in her absence, had returned to restore her mother's happiness, her bright laughter, her life. ", "To keep her from being entirely alone.", "\n\nA ridiculous plan, she knew, even as she got up in the cold room and dressed and then, lying, told Mrs. Tierney she was going to see her mother at the convent. ", "The lie itself, spoken out loud, making her ridiculous plan, her terrible plan, just that much more possible, the first step toward what she wanted to do. ", "She told her lie and left the house, and suddenly her scheme was not merely a flight of her imagination but something possible. ", "Something she might actually accomplish in the world: her mother's life, her mortal life and her eternal life, restored.", "\n\n\"Going by the convent to see my mother,\" she had said, lying so smoothly, leaving the house, and instead climbing the stairs to Mrs. Costello's apartment. ", "Letting herself in. ", "The good handful of alum in her purse, wrapped in the fragrant handkerchief.", "\n\nAnd now here she was, standing alone with it at the edge of Mrs. Costello's bed.", "\n\nShe skimmed a mouthful of the tea and slowly moved it toward the woman's lips. ", "Mrs. Costello took it easily, swallowed, touched her lips together. ", "But then shook her head. ", "She coughed, put her whole body into the cough and said, \"No more.\"", "\n\n\"A few more,\" Sally said. ", "She felt a fever flush, that unnatural heat, rise up into her collar, over her face. ", "Mrs. Costello took another, listless sip. ", "Her lips were dry, mean, and thin. ", "Pale hairs sprouted along the length of them. ", "The bones in her face, her cheeks and her chin, had grown prominent. ", "She was thin and pale, barely a wisp of a body. ", "Barely there. ", "Hardly a real presence in the room at all: no chest and narrow hips and only one good leg under the sheet and the counterpane. ", "And yet the impediment to so many things.", "\n\nSally spooned up the mixture at the bottom of the cup.", "\n\nNow Sister Jeanne came into the room again. ", "She, too, had a teacup in her hand, and a spoon. \"", "If you would take a bite to eat, Mrs. Costello,\" she was saying as she approached the bed. \"", "Maybe a bit of applesauce.\"", "\n\nMrs. Costello, still coughing, delicately now, was repeating her small, piping \"No.\" ", "Sinking again against her pillows. \"", "Step aside, dear,\" Sister Jeanne said to Sally. ", "She placed herself between the two.", "\n\nSally turned to the dresser and caught her own reflection in the mirror. ", "She looked pale and disheveled, wild-eyed, ridiculous. ", "A kind of madness in the way she clutched the delicate cup and saucer to her chest. ", "A kind of madness in the very notion of it: to stop a woman's throat. ", "Stop her breath. ", "To brush aside her thin and useless life, burdensome as it was, in order to get what she was seeking for the mother she loved above all else.", "\n\nShe looked at the young faces in the wedding photo.", "\n\nMrs. Costello's two good feet were in satin shoes just under the lace hem of her dress. ", "Mr. Costello's black hair was thick and wavy, glistening with pomade.", "\n\nWeren't they wild-eyed, too, looking out from the past?", "\n\nMrs. Costello was coughing again. ", "Sally glanced over her shoulder, and then, in the time it took her to turn fully, the cough seemed to change register. ", "The woman had sunk lower still in the bed, but now, suddenly, her spine arched as she coughed and her head fell back. ", "She lifted her face from the pillow like a swimmer breaking water. ", "Blotches of red appeared on her cheeks and her neck—they had the scattered and arbitrary shapes of shattered pottery. ", "Mrs. Costello pressed her palms against the mattress, as if to rise, and then the coughing took hold of her completely, her shortened leg flailing with it. ", "Sally moved toward her and felt the tea rise up over the rim of the cup, wetting her blouse. ", "She spun around to put the teacup down, and when she turned once again, it was into Sister Jeanne's dark back. ", "Sister had stepped away from the bed, although her white bonnet was still aimed toward Mrs. Costello. ", "She still held in her hands the cup of applesauce and the poised spoon. ", "The woman's coughing changed register once more, no longer a battling out of air—a sound like the beating of laundry—but of sucking air in, deep and wounded and gulping. ", "Her small mouth was open, and now so were her pale eyes, full of more expression than Sally had ever seen: panic, fear, pain, astonishment.", "\n\nSally heard herself cry out. ", "She took hold of the nun's sleeve. \"", "Help her, Sister. ", "She's choking.\"", "\n\nWithout turning her head, Sister Jeanne moved her arm, held it across Sally's waist, the spoon still in her hand, showing the girl that she should keep her distance. ", "Sister Jeanne held her arm steady, her eyes on Mrs. Costello. ", "She was steadfast and calm.", "\n\nSally apprehended only vaguely that Sister Jeanne knew it was better to wait, to stand back, to let the fit, the nonsense, pass.", "\n\nMrs. Costello's face was deeply purple now. ", "The sound coming from her was like a braying, a tearing. ", "Sally could see the woman's tongue in her wet mouth, between her blue lips. ", "Her chest was heaving, seeming to turn the wisp of her body inside out. ", "Mrs. Costello curled herself against the racket her lungs were making, against the struggle to breathe, bringing her good leg up to her middle, bowing her head down as if to meet it. ", "And then her coughing changed register again, falling off, suddenly subsiding. ", "Sally could once again hear the rain rattling down the gutters of the building.", "\n\nAnd then Sister Lucy was in the room like night descending. ", "She was still in her dark cloak, which seemed to be sailing, her black veil sailing, too. ", "Both sparkled with drops of rain. ", "Briefly, the room was infused with the smell of rain. ", "Sister Lucy was on the bed, hovering over the bed, Mrs. Costello, light as a feather, in her arms, so easily and familiarly it seemed the woman moved of her own accord, gave herself over to Sister Lucy's embrace. ", "And now Sister Jeanne was at the edge of the bed as well, holding the woman's shoulders as both nuns swiftly sat her up, slapped her wrists, and pounded her back. ", "And then, gently, like a mother with a small child, Sister Lucy cradled Mrs. Costello's head in the crook of her dark sleeve. ", "Time passed. ", "The woman seemed soothed. ", "The two Sisters eased her down again. ", "Sally saw Mrs. Costello's long braid, neatly done, swing forward. ", "She was limp, her mouth was gaping, and then Sister Lucy's cloak covered her face as the nun brushed her forehead with her thumb, brushing away some perspiration or a tear. ", "Sally saw Sister Jeanne bless herself. ", "Sister Lucy did the same.", "\n\nAnd then a strange silence, barely broken by the rain at the window. ", "The two nuns began to move about the bed with such grace and assurance that Sally imagined they were enacting a long-established routine. ", "Sister Lucy cupped the woman's head in her hand, lifting her skull to adjust the pillows underneath. ", "Then she gently placed it down again. ", "Sister Jeanne had pushed back the sheet and blanket and was arranging her nightgown over her legs, gently moving the good one, which had become bent in her ordeal, to a straighter, more comfortable position, moving the pliable shortened one into alignment. ", "Then she pulled the skirt of her nightgown down to her ankle.", "\n\nWithout a word, the two nuns lifted the twisted bed linens, up into the air and then down again, refreshed and smoothed. ", "They tucked her in neatly. ", "Sister Lucy moved the thin rope of Mrs. Costello's braid to her shoulder and then, with a handkerchief from her deep pocket, wiped the scattered spittle of applesauce, the smooth part, from her lips. ", "She returned the handkerchief to her pocket while Sister Jeanne went to the window to let in some cool air.", "\n\nIt wasn't until they both knelt, side by side in the lamp-lit room, that Sally understood Mrs. Costello was dead.", "\n\nOn the dresser was the teacup with the concoction she had stirred together, it seemed hours and hours ago now. ", "The tea had splattered when she placed it down. ", "Threw it down. ", "There was the smell of whiskey. ", "Beside it, too, was the cup and spoon Sister Jeanne had brought in to feed the woman. ", "Sally had not seen her put it down. ", "Inside the cup, Mrs. Odette's applesauce, with its lumps and bits of peel.", "\n\nIt all struck her as senseless now: food and drink carried in just a moment ago, carried in to feed a body now lifeless. ", "An absurdity.", "\n\nSlowly, with nothing to hold on to, Sally sank to her knees behind the two nuns. ", "Behind their dark veils and skirts and the worn, upturned soles of their black shoes. ", "They were saying the Hail Mary. ", "Sally sat back on her heels. ", "The rug here was a worn Persian, not unlike the rug in Sister Illuminata's laundry, where she had played as a child. ", "It was clean enough, Sally thought, but perhaps threaded here and there with street sand or mud. ", "Whatever Mr. Costello brought in on his big farmer's feet. ", "It was February. ", "No doubt the rug had been swept often in these last few months, but not taken out for a beating since spring.", "\n\nNow Sister Lucy was standing, slowly, leaning on Mrs. Costello's bed to get to her feet. ", "Mrs. Costello's body moved slightly in response to the pressure on the mattress. ", "Sister Jeanne knelt still, her head bent. ", "Sister Lucy, towering over them all now, looked down at Sally and tilted her head to indicate that she should leave the room. \"", "Pick up those cups,\" Sister Lucy said, her voice weary. ", "Sally had never before heard weariness in Sister Lucy's voice. ", "Obediently, she picked up the cup and saucer with the poisoned tea and ran her finger through the ring of the cup of applesauce. ", "She held both close to her chest. ", "On her way out, Sister Lucy stopped at the dresser, opened a drawer, and removed one of Mrs. Costello's neatly folded nightgowns, the one Sister Jeanne had put away just minutes ago. ", "She put it on the top of the dresser and went out.", "\n\nSally followed the nun into the kitchen. ", "Sister Lucy lifted the teakettle and then filled it at the sink and put a flame under it on the stove. ", "She went to the kitchen cupboard and found a tin washbasin. ", "She poured the warmed water into the basin and then, as if just remembering something—she let out a \"tut\" and shook her head—she went back into the living room. ", "And quickly returned with her cloak taken off and her apron over her habit, her veil tied back with a black ribbon. ", "She poured the rest of the water into the basin, took a bar of soap from the milk box beside the draped tub, placed it in the water. ", "She lifted the basin and walked out. ", "Pausing as she did to look Sally up and down, the two cups and the saucer still clutched to her chest. ", "She saw Sister Lucy's eyes look into the cup of applesauce, saw her eyebrow rise. ", "But Sister Lucy only said, \"Clean up, won't you?\"", "\n\nSally poured the tea and the pale dregs of sugar and alum into the sink. ", "She scraped the applesauce into the sink as well and saw the large pieces of apple and apple peel hesitate at the mouth of the drain. ", "She pushed them through with the spoon, running the water until all of it was washed away. ", "She could not think of the future. ", "She could not think of the next hour. ", "And all of the recent past seemed faded and unreal. ", "She could barely recall her ridiculous plan. ", "What had she wanted, exactly? ", "Why was she here?", "\n\nShe took the dust rag and the broom from the corner and returned to the living room, where she ran the rag along the two faded lampshades, then across the mantel of the sealed fireplace. ", "Over the statue of St. Joseph with his hammer in his fist, his hand to his heart. ", "From the bedroom, she could hear the two nuns moving about; there was the swish of the water in the basin, the clean scent of the soap, the occasional exchange of brief words, \"Another towel, Sister,\" \"Thank you, Sister,\" \"If you'll just hold her there . . .\"", "\n\nSister Jeanne emerged from the room with the basin full of soapy water, but her head was bent and Sally could not see her face. ", "She heard her empty the water and put a few things away. ", "And then she passed through the room again. ", "She touched Sally's arm and looked up at her. ", "Sally could see that her eyes were bloodshot and her face was drained of color, gray against her white coif and the white brim of her bonnet. ", "Her small mouth was drawn. \"", "Come in for a prayer,\" she whispered.", "\n\nReluctantly, Sally leaned the broom against the mantel, placed the dust rag beside it. ", "She ran her damp palms over her skirt. ", "Sister Jeanne waited for her at the door of the bedroom, and then put her arm out as Sally approached, to indicate that the girl should go ahead of her. ", "Sally recalled the way Sister Jeanne had put out her arm as she'd tried to near Mrs. Costello's bed, blocking her way.", "\n\nThe room held a new light. ", "At first Sally thought the day outside had cleared, sunlight breaking through the clouds and the window shades, but then she saw that two candles were lit on the dresser. ", "The smell of the new flame mixed pleasantly with the fresh linen on the bed and the lingering scent of the soap they had used to bathe her. ", "Mrs. Costello was as she had been. ", "Her body still and narrow under the counterpane, the slope of her knee, the space of her missing leg. ", "Her hands were now crossed over the breast of her fresh nightgown, small wisps of damp hair prettily framing her face. ", "Her face was as pale as ever, but there was a new grayness to her lips, and her features had grown sharper, more finely honed.", "\n\nThe china-faced dolls on the dresser were terrible.", "\n\nSally began to cry. ", "She lowered her head. ", "She gave herself over to it freely. ", "She thought of nothing at all, not the last hour or days or weeks, nothing of the hours ahead. ", "Sister Jeanne put an arm around her waist. ", "Sally felt the nun's small hand press itself into her side, clutching and letting go. ", "Everything she had planned, imagined, hoped for, all her fraught negotiations with herself, with God, with the future and the past, were nothing before this stillness. ", "She could not trace, for the moment, what had brought her here, could not parse, for a moment, what it meant. ", "She simply cried. ", "The scent of candle flame and soap and Sister Jeanne's habit, the fresh handkerchief the little nun placed gently into her hands. ", "Sister Lucy. ", "The sound of rain on the windows, rattling in the gutters. ", "The still figure on the bed and the scent, too, of death, animal death, a dead mouse behind the wall, encroaching on the room.", "\n\nSister Lucy said, whispering—Sally had never heard her whisper before—\"Mr. ", "Costello will be home shortly.\" ", "Which meant Sally should go.", "\n\nShe returned to the living room with Sister Jeanne, still drying her tears. ", "She put on her hat and her coat—it seemed a lifetime since she had taken them off—and then had to return to the kitchen for her purse. ", "Sister Jeanne followed her. ", "She said, \"Take a drink of water before you go. ", "Put a little cold water on your face,\" and Sally went to the sink to obey. ", "And then as she turned, Sister Jeanne handed her the pocketbook. ", "The clasp was open. ", "Sister held on to the strap for just the extra second it took for her to raise her head, to meet Sally's eyes. ", "Sister Jeanne said, \"You did no harm, dear. ", "Whatever you'd thought to do.\" ", "She said, \"God is fair. ", "He knows the truth.\"", "\n\nSally went down the narrow stairs of Mrs. Costello's building and walked the sixteen blocks to the hotel. ", "The streets crackled with the sound of rain, and voices, and cars and trucks. ", "Someone shouted, some girls in a shop doorway laughed, a procession of solemn faces under raised umbrellas passed her by, some looking at her, some looking away, and all unaware—she believed, briefly—of the stillness that would overtake them. ", "Overtake their features, their gesturing arms and hands, their moving mouths and chests. ", "She reached the hotel and saw the hurrying figures, coming in and out, making the glass doors flash, Mr. Tierney himself in his beige uniform, a whistle to his lips, his hand in the air, the black street shining like patent leather at his feet. ", "His laughing mouth and thick mustache—as a coin was slipped into his hand, slipped into his pocket—all unaware of the paralysis that would come to them, the sudden stillness, final, irrevocable. ", "She went inside, down the elevator to the employees' room. ", "She imagined as she changed each of the girls who chatted around her with her head limp, caught in the gentle crook of a dark arm, eased down to a pillow, still. ", "She saw in the tearoom, the calm hush of the place—gentle rattle of cups and saucers and spoons, soft mouthing of cakes and sandwiches, murmured conversation—the dumb oblivion of the human race. ", "A terrible stillness would overtake them all, come what may. ", "A terrible silence would stop their breaths, one way or another, and yet they spooned sugar into their cups or leaned back to take a watch from a waistband or pressed a linen napkin to their pink lips.", "\n\nShe walked home after work, in the cold darkness, under streetlamps encircled with fog. ", "How would she live, having seen what she had seen? ", "It had been one thing to refuse the convent, to say, \"I've thought better of it,\" after the long train ride showed her the truth of the dirty world, showed her that her own impulse was to meet its filthy citizens not with a consoling cloth, but with a curse, a punch in the face. ", "But now it was life itself she wanted to refuse, for how could she live knowing that stillness, that inconsequence, that feral smell of death, was what her days were aiming her toward?", "\n\nEach church she passed was faintly lit at this odd hour of the day. ", "Lent had begun. ", "She knew the statues inside were covered in purple shrouds. ", "Something familiar in their wet stone and shadow as she passed them. ", "Dampness and cold rock. ", "Familiar but comfortless. ", "She walked to the convent. ", "Here the lamplight at the windows seemed dim as well. ", "The nuns would be praying at the weary end of their hard day. ", "She walked to her own apartment—her mother's apartment—and saw the light was on in the bedroom window. ", "Was her mother in there entirely alone, or was it Mr. Costello returned to her? ", "She had not thought of him all afternoon. ", "Or of her mother's life ahead. ", "Lilac, lily of the valley. ", "June weather. ", "Now they were free to wed. She tried to let the notion, something about happiness, about the brightness of the coming days, flood her bones, her nerves—the way prayer could sometimes relieve that electric itch to move. ", "But no thoughts of summer could soothe her recollection of Mrs. Costello gone still.", "\n\nThe violet handkerchief with the remnant of the alum was still in her purse.", "\n\nHer intentions, her murderous, ridiculous scheme, struck her as childish now, naïve and innocent. ", "She had wanted to save her mother's soul even if it meant the death of her own. ", "But she hadn't known, childish, naïve as she was, what any of it meant.", "\n\nHer father knew. ", "Had known it all along, lying in his hollowed-out place underground: a stillness no prayer, no wish, no imagining, no sacrifice could overcome. ", "Of course he would never return to them.", "\n\nShe let herself into the Tierney kitchen. ", "She had been walking for hours. ", "Tom and Patrick were at the kitchen table under a single bulb, books and papers spread before them. ", "They were both taking night classes. ", "They looked up with sibling indifference when she came in. \"", "We were wondering what happened to you,\" Tom said. \"", "Ma thought you'd gone back to your mother's.\"", "\n\nOnce more she slipped out of her hat and her coat, which were now heavy with rain, and hung them on the hooks by the door. ", "She put her purse on the floor and came into the dim light of the kitchen.", "\n\n\"You look like a drowned rat,\" Patrick said blithely, and then, without standing, pulled out the chair beside him. \"", "Take a load off,\" he said. \"", "Have a glass of milk.\" ", "He leaned back to get a glass from the drain board and filled it from the bottle already on the table. ", "He put it before her as she sat, and then, in the way of siblings, the two ignored her completely as they went back to their studies. ", "She had never in her life been so weary, not even after her two sleepless nights on the train.", "\n\nPatrick was explaining some diagram to Tom, something he had already drawn on notebook paper. ", "Tom was running his hand through his hair, making it stand on end, resisting the explanation.", "\n\n\"Water seeks its own level,\" Patrick said. \"", "Don't you get it?\"", "\n\nTom said impatiently, \"No, I don't get it. ", "And saying it over and over again isn't going to make any difference. ", "What does it mean? ", "Are you telling me water has a brain, a pair of eyes? ", "Does it go about with its arms stuck out like a blind man? ", "It's nonsense.\"", "\n\nPatrick leaned over the page. \"", "What it means is . . . ,\" ", "he said, and moved his finger across the paper. \"", "Just try to follow. ", "Here's the aqueduct. ", "Here's the water tower. ", "There's the conduit. ", "There's the valve. ", "Are you following?\"", "\n\n\"I'm listening,\" Tom said. \"", "But I'm not following.\" ", "In the dim kitchen light, his features were shadowed. ", "He was taller than his brother, and heavier as well. ", "There was a hooded look about his eyes. ", "He was slow-witted and Patrick was quick. ", "This was a given in the family. ", "The source of many jokes, the brunt of which was equally divided between them: Tom for the mistakes he made out of ignorance, Patrick for the mistakes he made out of arrogance.", "\n\n\"Well, then,\" Patrick went on, \"water seeks its own level,\" and before he could continue, Tom was on his feet. \"", "That's it,\" he said. \"", "I'm through.\" ", "He turned to Sally. \"", "You can talk to this parrot if you like. ", "What I seek is some sleep.\" ", "He stabbed a hand at the wide kitchen sink. \"", "Turn on the tap if you want to find out what the water is seeking.\"", "\n\nHe walked out of the kitchen, and then they heard his footsteps on the stairs. ", "Patrick shrugged, took back his diagram, and slipped it into one of his books. ", "He began to straighten his papers. ", "Awkward in the sudden silence. \"", "Would you like some more milk?\" ", "he asked her. ", "She hadn't touched the glass he'd poured.", "\n\n\"No, thank you,\" she said. ", "He emptied the bottle into his own glass and then looked at it unhappily, shook his head, annoyed, as if someone else had poured it. ", "As if, with his glass now full, he was forced to remain at the table with her. ", "He lifted it and drank.", "\n\n\"My mother thought you'd gone back to your own place tonight,\" he said, putting it down again and wiping his lip. \"", "When you didn't come in.\"", "\n\nSally said, \"No.\"", "\n\nCautiously, he added, \"She says you're going back to your mother's, though.\"", "\n\nSally said, \"I don't know.\" ", "She was uncertain what Patrick understood about her mother's situation. ", "She imagined very little. ", "It was hardly something Mrs. Tierney would discuss with a grown son. ", "Hardly something a young man like Patrick would have any interest in. ", "For the past few months, the family merely pretended, by some unspoken agreement, that Sally had taken their spare room in order to be closer to the hotel, although Mr. Tierney had gotten her the job in the tearoom only after Sister Lucy had brought her here, not before.", "\n\nShe put her hand on the tall glass of milk on the table. ", "She said, \"The lady I sometimes visit in the morning, Mrs. Costello,\" and paused, \"she passed away today while I was there.\"", "\n\nPatrick slumped in his chair, as if he had absorbed a soft blow. ", "He blessed himself. \"", "Sorry to hear that,\" he said. \"", "Was she ill?\"", "\n\n\"She had pneumonia,\" Sally said. ", "And then added, \"She was a one-legged woman. ", "They had to take off her leg when a dog bite became infected. ", "This was years ago. ", "It made her somewhat touched.\" ", "And she touched her temple so he would understand.", "\n\nPatrick drank from his glass again, and then lowered it reluctantly. ", "He searched his memory for something, alighted on it, and then asked her, \"Is this the milkman's wife?\" ", "as if he had just put two and two together. ", "He gestured toward the bottle on the drain board. ", "It was clear from his expression that he was immediately uncertain if this was the proper question to ask.", "\n\nSally said, \"That's right.\"", "\n\nHe nodded again. ", "Resolved to set the conversation on a better track. ", "Said, \"My mother mentioned how nice you were to go sit with her. ", "It couldn't have been easy. ", "One-legged and touched in the head, like you said.\" ", "And was pleased with himself.", "\n\nSally said, \"No, it was not. ", "Not always.\"", "\n\nThen they sat in silence. ", "Two flights up, his father was snoring. ", "Mr. Tierney could raise the roof on some nights. ", "She saw Patrick glance at her, gauging her appreciation for the sound, embarrassed by it. ", "It occurred to Sally that he was incapable of keeping anything out of his face, his eyes—clever as he was, you could read his every thought if you watched him carefully.", "\n\nIt was difficult to think of such a face gone still.", "\n\nHe said, \"Did you ever hear my father's story about Red Whelan? ", "I mean, speaking of the one-legged among us.\"", "\n\nShe said no, and so he told it.", "\n\nHe took the long way round with the tale, adding, as was his wont in those days when he was the brighter son, everything he knew about the history of the Civil War, the charms of the doorman's trade, his parent's storied romance, and that spring evening—dinnertime, the lilac bush at the dining room window not yet in bloom—when Red Whelan, his grandfather's substitute in the war, knocked at the door.", "\n\nAnd he ended it all with a flourish, indicating with a sweep of his right hand the tin ceiling of the kitchen and the fine five-bedroom house above it, as if the house, the brick and stone of it, proved the validity of all he had told her. ", "As if the tale itself, only talk, only breath on air, had nevertheless brought them both to this solid and irrefutable present where they were alone together in the middle of the night, alone and awake and—true for him, at least—in love.", "\n\nHe gestured widely with his right hand at the end of all his talking, because in his left he held Sally's thin fingers. ", "They had, at long last, grown warm in his grip and he was reluctant to let them go.", "\nGrace\n\nOur father said, \"After that, your mother's life went from black-and-white to color. ", "In my humble opinion.\"", "\n\nHer mother's wedding in June. ", "Although it was a brief weekday ceremony in the empty church, still there was lilac and lily of the valley. ", "And then the shedding of those two apartments—one thick with paint and repaint, the other as sparse as a monk's cell. ", "They bought a brownstone in Liz Tierney's neighborhood. ", "Mr. Tierney himself providing a generous loan out of his \"reparations.\" ", "Then—\" just under the wire,\" our father said, \"all kinds of wires\"—Annie, at forty-eight, giving birth to another daughter on a bright morning. ", "Grace, they called her.", "\n\nSally pushed the child in the perambulator when Annie went back to the convent laundry to help out—there had been another young widow hired while Annie was in confinement, another young widow with a child who played on the floor.", "\n\nPatrick Tierney joined her in these walks whenever he could—reminiscing, even then, about the charmed lives they had led as children, taken out every morning by their two mothers. ", "The two empresses, he called them. ", "Sally told him those days, her days as a convent child, were a pale dream when compared to the life she now lived: in a tall house with a baby sister and a mother who knew some leisure. ", "And a father of sorts. ", "Mr. Costello never could look her straight in the eye, but the apology he seemed always on the verge of offering made him both tongue-tied and tender in her presence. ", "He grew dear to her.", "\n\nThe courtship that began on the long night that Patrick Tierney had talked and talked in his mother's kitchen didn't end until Grace headed off to school, and he finally found the courage to propose.", "\n\nSally was mourning the loss of the little girl's steady presence in her days when he asked her, \"How about some babies of your own?\"", "\n\nAs inelegant a proposal, our father said, as any man has ever made.", "\n\nWhen our father was very old—we were growing old ourselves—he told again the story he had told her that wet night, the story of his grandfather's funeral, the train ride, the Irish maid behind the screen.", "\n\nIf your mother hadn't come back from the nuns, our father said, that's probably the girl I'd have married.", "\n\nHe remembered once more his father's chestnut mustache and his trim suit, his flask of whiskey. ", "And then his father's tears in the dark hours of that dreadful night. ", "Love's a tonic, his mother had said, not a cure.", "\n\nOld Red Whelan.", "\n\nWe were gathered in our father's room. ", "His own lifetime across a dozen different tenements, a fine house with five bedrooms, the tumbledown site of our own happy childhoods, now compressed into a bedroom and a bath and a small kitchenette, his days now confined to the high-rise facility he had selected for himself after our mother died, selected with a bachelor's care: something simple and sparse and his alone.", "\n\nHe had begun to remind us, without the least prompting, that he'd had a good life, repeating the tales of his crowded childhood, his elegant father, his mother, who was as sharp as a knife.", "\n\nOur mother, who thought to be a nun, but then thought better of it. \"", "St. Saviour, you know, was her baptismal name.\"", "\n\nA fatherless girl, a convent child in white wool. ", "The girl he always knew he would marry.", "\n\nGrowing old ourselves, we indulged him. ", "We listened to the same stories told again and kept silent about the truth: that our mother's midlife melancholy was clinical depression, unspoken of in those days.", "\n\nThat Great-aunt Rose's happy tremor as we guided her up the stairs was surely the Parkinson's that had visited us as well.", "\n\nThat the holy nuns who sailed through the house when we were young were a dying breed even then. ", "The Bishop with his eye on their rich man's mansion even then. ", "The call to sanctity and self-sacrifice, the delusion and superstition it required, fading from the world even then.", "\n\nWe asked, And how much would they have paid him—Red Whelan—because it was history we were talking about so comfortably, here at the end of our father's days and the new waning of our own. ", "History was easy: the past with all loss burned out of it, all sorrow worn out of it—all that was merely personal comfortably removed.", "\n\nHow much would it have cost his grandfather to hire a substitute during the Civil War?", "\n\nWe did a search. ", "From the computer on our father's desk we read out: _The Conscription Act of 1863_ . . . ", "we read out, _three hundred dollars_ . . . _", "an option available only to the well-off_.", "\n\nAnd Lincoln, too, had a substitute, we discovered. ", "Who knew? ", "A young man recruited to serve in Lincoln's stead. ", "Brought to the White House, given the Commander's blessing. ", "Given a short war, it turned out. ", "An article in an old _New York Times_ about a statue proposed to honor the young man in his own hometown, the young man who had agreed to serve as Lincoln's substitute in the Civil War.", "\n\nAlthough not at Ford's Theatre, we said, laughing about it. ", "We said he'd have done the President more good if he'd served as his substitute at Ford's Theatre.", "\n\nOur father said, \"My father told his old man, 'One life's already been given to save your skin.' ", "And never forgave himself for the cruelty of it.\"", "\n\nHe said, \"It was all a very long time ago.\"", "\n\nScrolling down—the black newsprint quaintly askew—we saw on the same page: SUICIDE ENDANGERS OTHERS.", "\n\n\"That would be the man,\" our father said when we read it to him. \"", "That would be Jim, your mother's father. ", "A suicide then,\" he said sadly. \"", "A suicide in the family.\"", "\n\nHe said, \"Thank God your mother never knew.\"", "\n\nWe thought of the hushed afternoons of our childhood, our mother sleeping off her melancholy, the nuns sailing in—standing in for She Who Could Not Be Replaced—keeping her in the world. ", "Keeping her for us.", "\n\nWe marveled to think of it: how much went unspoken in those days. ", "How much they believed was at stake.", "\n\n\"Well, the truth's out now,\" our father said.", "\nEndless Length of Days\n\nSister Jeanne asked us, \"Have you ever worn an itchy old coat? ", "The wool's too rough and it's tight in the sleeves. ", "And you can't run in it too well because it binds here and there, across your hips. ", "You've outgrown it, see? ", "Maybe you put it on in the morning cause it's all you've got, and maybe it's a dark morning and cold, but then the sun goes up in the sky—even on a cold and cloudy day, the sun goes up, doesn't it, day after day—so by three o'clock, when you're walking home from school, there's sunlight hitting you on the head, feeling like a big hand pressing down, or maybe a sledgehammer. ", "It's heating up your shoulders and your back, and you're starting to feel prickly inside that stiff old coat. ", "You're feeling all perspiry, see, and prickly hot.\"", "\n\nShe hunched her shoulders in their dark serge to demonstrate our discomfort. ", "Inside her bonnet she was smiling at us. ", "Behind her in the frame of the dining room window, the long shadows of a golden afternoon or a descending dusk, a snow squall or spring blossoms, maybe a gray rain.", "\n\n\"And what will you do the minute you come through that door?\" ", "She pointed over our heads to the kitchen door, and we turned as if we would see ourselves, evoked by her words, coming into the house as we always did: hand to the glass knob, shoulder to the peeling paint.", "\n\n\"Don't I know what you'll do? ", "Didn't I do it myself as a girl? ", "You'll shimmy and shake and fight and jiggle until you get that old coat off. ", "You'll pull the sleeves inside out.\"", "\n\nInside the white bonnet she closed her deep-set eyes. ", "She raised her clasped hands to her chin—a round, protruding chin, brushed with rosacea, like the sun blush of a laborer from the field—and touched the steeple of her two index fingers to her small mouth. ", "She said, her eyes closed, \"When you finally get the old thing off, the air in this house will feel as cool and as sweet as silk on your skin, won't it? ", "It will feel like cool water on the back of your neck and on your wrists.\" ", "She opened her eyes again and we saw that they were bright with tears. \"", "It will be like when your mother's sheets are out on the line, maybe on an afternoon in the fall or in the spring, and you walk through them when nobody's watching. ", "You let those sheets brush over your face and slide over your head and then fall down your back, don't you? ", "And then you turn around to do it again. ", "I've seen you. ", "Sweet-smelling, they are. ", "And clean.\"", "\n\nShe laughed, her eyes shining. \"", "That's how good the air feels when you've shucked off that old coat, isn't it?\"", "\n\nShe said, \"That's how you'll feel when you get to heaven, see? ", "A long time from now for you, please God. ", "Very soon for your old aunty.\"", "\n\nAnd then a shadow passed across her face, although her back was to the bright window, although there was no telling its source. ", "Her skin looked gray, her eyes lost their laughter. \"", "But it's not for me,\" she said, \"that relief. ", "Never for me. ", "That beauty.\"", "\n\nShe said, \"I lost heaven a long time ago.\" ", "She put her hand on the chain that held the crucifix around her neck, gripped it against her white bib. \"", "Back when your mother was still a girl. ", "All of eighteen, I think.\" ", "She paused, thoughtful. \"", "Out of love, I lost it. ", "Which sounds funny, doesn't it? ", "You'd think you could only lose heaven out of hate.\" ", "She shrugged, always girlish. \"", "But I lost it all the same.\"", "\n\nAbove us, our mother was sleeping off the melancholy that claimed her, even in the midst of our bright and happy childhoods. ", "Old Aunt Rose, already a figure from a long ago past, was dusted with dust in our attic room.", "\n\nSister Jeanne touched her fist to her breast. ", "Behind her, a swarm of blossoms, of yellowing leaves, of snow or frozen rain. \"", "I gave up my place in heaven a long time ago,\" she said. \"", "Out of love for my friends.\"", "\n\nInside her white bonnet, her small eyes, an old woman's fading eyes, were moving over us. ", "Briefly, something affectionate, even joyful, overcame the sorrow in them, but only briefly. ", "When that gray shadow returned, we recognized it not as a passing light, no more than the blink of an eye, but as a grief that had always been there in her dear old face. \"", "God knows my heart,\" she said. \"", "So I don't ask for His forgiveness, see?\"", "\n\nThe fist that held the chain that held her crucifix opened itself out until her fingers were splayed over her heart.", "\n\nShe said, \"I'll never shed this old coat. ", "And that will be my torment.\"", "\n\nOnce more her eyes went around the table, touched each of our faces. \"", "But you'll pray for me, won't you?\" ", "she asked. \"", "You'll pray for this lost soul?\"", "\n\nWe said we would, understanding none of it. ", "Or believing, perhaps, that it was only her great humility, her holiness, that made her say she was unworthy of heaven.", "\n\nAnd then, in her familiar way, the grin in her voice gave over to laughter. ", "We saw her fragile shoulders move against her dark veil. ", "We felt her delight in us, which was familiar as well, delight in our presence, our living and breathing selves—a tonic for all sorrow.", "\n\nShe whispered, \"God has hidden these things from the wise and prudent, see? ", "He's revealed them only to the little ones.\"", "\nAlso available by Alice McDermott\n\nSomeone\n\nSHORTLISTED FOR THE INTERNATIONAL IMPAC DUBLIN LITERARY AWARD 2015\n\nLONGLISTED FOR THE NATIONAL BOOK AWARD 2014\n\nSomeone begins on the stoop of a Brooklyn apartment building where Marie is waiting for her father to come home from work. ", "It is the 1920s and in her Irish-American enclave the stories of her neighbours unfold before her short-sighted eyes. ", "As the years pass Marie's own history plays out against the backdrop of a changing world. ", "This is the story of one life in all its devastating pains and unexpected joys; its bursts of brilliant clarity and moments of profound confusion. ", "Fragments of a curious childhood, of adolescent sexual awakenings, of motherhood and, finally, old age are pieced together in this resonant tale of an unremarkable, unforgettable woman.", "\n\n'A beautiful book' Sunday Telegraph\n\n'Exquisite... Someone is a wonderfully modest title for such a fine-tuned, beautiful book filled with so much universal experience, such haunting imagery, such urgent matters of life and death' New York Times\n\n'McDermott's wisdom, gently hewn out of the stuff of every day, shines through this memorably atmospheric story' The Times\n\nClick here to order\nCharming Billy\n\nThe late Billy Lynch's family and friends gather at a small bar and grill in the Bronx to remember better times. ", "His widow, Maeve, is there and everyone admires the way she is holding up, just as they always admired the way she cared for Billy after the alcohol had ruined him. ", "But one cannot think of Billy without saying at some point, 'There was that girl'. ", "On Long Island one summer years ago, Billy fell in love with a beautiful Irish girl working for a wealthy Park Avenue family. ", "Billy wanted to marry Eva, but then she went back to Ireland. ", "And then Billy's cousin Dennis had to break the terrible news: Eva had died of pneumonia. ", "Billy never got over it. ", "Anybody who knew him would tell you so. ", "Billy began courting Maeve not long after, but for the rest of their lives, he, she and Dennis shared a hidden, twisted grief.", "\n\n'A masterpiece of subtle, oblique storytelling, in which what's left unsaid resonates as much as what's said' Time Out\n\n'McDermott takes on the stereotype she has described as 'the lovable Irish drunk' and turns it inside out...showing that the more familiar a story, the harder its truth is to grasp ... A constantly surprising and involving novel' Harpers & Queen\n\nClick here to order\nAt Weddings and Wakes\n\nTwice a week, Lucy Dailey leaves suburbia with her three children in tow, returning to the Brooklyn home where she grew up, and where her stepmother and unmarried sisters still live. ", "Aunt Veronica, with her wounded face and dreams of beauty, drowns her sorrows in drink. ", "Aunt Agnes, an acerbic student of elegance, sips only from the finest crystal as she sees Aunt May, the ex-nun, blossom with a late and unexpected love. ", "And all the while, the children watch, absorbing the legacy of their haunted family. ", "At once a moving evocation of life's inexplicable calamities and a magical celebration of childhood and familial love, At Weddings and Wakes is the story of three generations of an Irish-American family through the eyes of its youngest members. ", "With eloquence and grace, master storyteller Alice McDermott transforms everyday experience into the heroic and universal.", "\n\nClick here to order\nAfter This\n\nAlice McDermott's masterful novel is a portrait of a working-class American family living through the tumultuous middle decades of the twentieth century. ", "While Michael and Annie Keane taste the alternately intoxicating and bitter fruits of the sexual revolution, their older brother, Jacob, finds himself on the way to Vietnam. ", "Clare, the youngest child, seeks to maintain an almost saintly innocence. ", "As their parents, John and Mary, struggle to uphold the family's framework, the four siblings are destined to experience the challenges and liberties of the 1960s. ", "With McDermott's inimitable understanding and grace, After This captures the joy, sorrow, anger and love that underpin, and undermine, what it is to be a family.", "\n\n'Sublime ... McDermott's simple prose is full of poetic distillations that capture a mood or a moment just so, and it all comes together in a radiant portrait of family life' Daily Mail\n\n'McDermott has laid bare the nerve centre of a family, and located an enduring grace in the constraints and confusion of day-to-day life' Times Literary Supplement\n\n'The triumph of Alice McDermott's After This is its evocation of childhood ... McDermott's unshowy, succinct sentences summon up the flavour of the past when it was new' Sunday Times\n\nClick here to order\nA Bigamist's Daughter\n\nElizabeth Connelly sits in a New York office that looks like a real editor's, but isn't quite. ", "Employed at a vanity press, Elizabeth watches the real world – of real struggles, passion, pain and love – spin around her.", "\n\nUntil one day, a young writer comes to her with a novel about a man who loves more than one woman at once. ", "And suddenly Elizabeth will be awakened from her young urban professional slumber – by a man's real touch and by a real story in search of an ending. ", "This is a luminous novel of memory, revelation and desire.", "\n\n'Impressive ... McDermott writes with assurance and skill, and has created a fascinatingly prismatic story' Anne Tyler, New York Times Book Review\n\n'Beautifully written fiction ... an Irish-American Anne Tyler' Washington Post\n\n'One of our finest novelists at work today' Los Angeles Times\n\nClick here to order\nThat Night\n\nOn a warm suburban night, the sound of lawn sprinklers is drowned out by the rumble of hot rods. ", "Suddenly, a car careens onto a family's neat front yard, teenage boys spill out brandishing chains and leather, and a young man cries out for the girl he loves.", "\n\nTonight, fathers will pick up snow shovels and rakes to defend their turf, and children will witness a battle fuelled by fierce, true love. ", "This is the night they will talk about and remember as the moment things changed for ever.", "\n\n'A stunning work' Sunday Times\n\n'A wonderfully unfettered, ample novel. ", "One that celebrates voice, personality and feeling when so much fiction avoids those rewarding characteristics' New York Times Book Review\n\n'That Night has universal appeal ... there is a depth of feeling here which is beautifully – and seriously – realised' Independent\n\nClick here to order\nChild of My Heart\n\nOn the cusp of fifteen, pretty Theresa is the town's most sought-after babysitter – cheerful, beloved, adored by children and animals, but also a solitary soul with an already complex understanding of human nature. ", "She is Titania among her fairies, the one person to call on for help with a child in extreme distress.", "\n\nTheresa does not doubt her power over the fathers of her adoring charges either, whose potential lechery Theresa toys with like a kitten with yarn. ", "Yet during this unforgettable summer, it is her cousin Daisy, a frail little creature with glittery shoes and worrying bruises that don't heal, in whom Theresa invests her greatest love.", "\n\n'McDermott's elegant, understated prose slips down like a cool, refreshing drink' Sunday Telegraph\n\n'A remarkably poised and provocative work ... uplifting, enchanting ... the story is so authentic: you'll return refreshed and ready to look your tired adult's world with new eyes' Observer\n\nClick here to order\n\n<https://www.bloomsbury.com/author/alice-mcdermott>\nFirst published in Great Britain 2017\n\nThis electronic edition published in 2017 by Bloomsbury Publishing Plc\n\n© Alice McDermott, 2017\n\nAlice McDermott has asserted her right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act, 1988, to be identified as Author of this work.", "\n\nAn excerpt from _The Ninth Hour_ originally appeared, in slightly different form, in the _New Yorker_.", "\n\nThis is a work of fiction. ", "Names and characters are the product of the author's imagination and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.", "\n\nAll rights reserved. ", "You may not copy, distribute, transmit, reproduce or otherwise make available this publication (or any part of it) in any form, or by any means (including without limitation electronic, digital, optical, mechanical, photocopying, printing, recording or otherwise), without the prior written permission of the publisher. ", "Any person who does any unauthorised act in relation to this publication may be liable to criminal prosecution and civil claims for damages\n\nBloomsbury Publishing Plc\n\n50 Bedford Square\n\nLondon\n\nWC1B 3DP\n\nwww.bloomsbury.com\n\nBloomsbury is a trademark of Bloomsbury Publishing Plc\n\nBloomsbury Publishing, London, Oxford, New York, New Delhi and Sydney\n\nA CIP catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library\n\nISBN 978 1 4088 5461 7\n\neISBN 978 1 4088 5462 4\n\nTo find out more about our authors and books visit www.bloomsbury.com. ", "Here you will find extracts, author interviews, details of forthcoming events and the option to sign up for our newsletters.", "\nContents\n\n 1. ", "Cover\n 2. ", "Half-title Page\n 3. ", "Dedication\n 4. ", "Also by Alice McDermott\n 5. ", "Title Page\n 6. ", "Contents\n 7. ", "These Short Dark Days\n 8. ", "And Then\n 9. ", "The Ninth Hour\n 10. ", "Alone\n 11. ", "Rose\n 12. ", "The Convent Child\n 13. ", "Orders\n 14. ", "Sister Lucy\n 15. ", "Reparation\n 16. ", "Overnight\n 17. ", "Stabat Mater\n 18. ", "The Substitute\n 19. ", "True\n 20. ", "A Tonic\n 21. ", "Mercy\n 22. ", "Holy\n 23. ", "Still\n 24. ", "Grace\n 25. ", "Endless Length of Days\n 26. ", "Also available by Alice McDermott\n 1. ", "Someone\n 2. ", "Charming Billy\n 3. ", "At Weddings and Wakes\n 4. ", "After This\n 5. ", "A Bigamist's Daughter\n 6. ", "That Night\n 7. ", "Child of My Heart\n 27. ", "Copyright Page\n\n 1. ", "These Short Dark Days\n 2. ", "And Then\n 3. ", "The Ninth Hour\n 4. ", "Alone\n 5. ", "Rose\n 6. ", "The Convent Child\n 7. ", "Orders\n 8. ", "Sister Lucy\n 9. ", "Reparation\n 10. ", "Overnight\n 11. ", "Stabat Mater\n 12. ", "The Substitute\n 13. ", "True\n 14. ", "A Tonic\n 15. ", "Mercy\n 16. ", "Holy\n 17. ", "Still\n 18. ", "Grace\n 19. ", "Endless Length of Days\n 20. _", "Also available by Alice McDermott_\n\n 1. ", "i\n 2. ", "ii\n 3. ", "iii\n 4. ", "iv\n 5. ", "v\n 6. ", "\n 7. ", "\n 8. ", "\n 9. ", "\n 10. ", "\n 11. ", "\n 12. ", "\n 13. ", "\n 14. ", "\n 15. ", "\n 16. ", "\n 17. ", "\n 18. ", "\n 19. ", "\n 20. ", "\n 21. ", "\n 22. ", "\n 23. ", "\n 24. ", "\n 25. ", "\n 26. ", "\n 27. ", "\n 28. ", "\n 29. ", "\n 30. ", "\n 31. ", "\n 32. ", "\n 33. ", "\n 34. ", "\n 35. ", "\n 36. ", "\n 37. ", "\n 38. ", "\n 39. ", "\n 40. ", "\n 41. ", "\n 42. ", "\n 43. ", "\n 44. ", "\n 45. ", "\n 46. ", "\n 47. ", "\n 48. ", "\n 49. ", "\n 50. ", "\n 51. ", "\n 52. ", "\n 53. ", "\n 54. ", "\n 55. ", "\n 56. ", "\n 57. ", "\n 58. ", "\n 59. ", "\n 60. ", "\n 61. ", "\n 62. ", "\n 63. ", "\n 64. ", "\n 65. ", "\n 66. ", "\n 67. ", "\n 68. ", "\n 69. ", "\n 70. ", "\n 71. ", "\n 72. ", "\n 73. ", "\n 74. ", "\n 75. ", "\n 76. ", "\n 77. ", "\n 78. ", "\n 79. ", "\n 80. ", "\n 81. ", "\n 82. ", "\n 83. ", "\n 84. ", "\n 85. ", "\n 86. ", "\n 87. ", "\n 88. ", "\n 89. ", "\n 90. ", "\n 91. ", "\n 92. ", "\n 93. ", "\n 94. ", "\n 95. ", "\n 96. ", "\n 97. ", "\n 98. ", "\n 99. ", "\n 100. ", "\n 101. ", "\n 102. ", "\n 103. ", "\n 104. ", "\n 105. ", "\n 106. ", "\n 107. ", "\n 108. ", "\n 109. ", "\n 110. ", "\n 111. ", "\n 112. ", "\n 113. ", "\n 114. ", "\n 115. ", "\n 116. ", "\n 117. ", "\n 118. ", "\n 119. ", "\n 120. ", "\n 121. ", "\n 122. ", "\n 123. ", "\n 124. ", "\n 125. ", "\n 126. ", "\n 127. ", "\n 128. ", "\n 129. ", "\n 130. ", "\n 131. ", "\n 132. ", "\n 133. ", "\n 134. ", "\n 135. ", "\n 136. ", "\n 137. ", "\n 138. ", "\n 139. ", "\n 140. ", "\n 141. ", "\n 142. ", "\n 143. ", "\n 144. ", "\n 145. ", "\n 146. ", "\n 147. ", "\n 148. ", "\n 149. ", "\n 150. ", "\n 151. ", "\n 152. ", "\n 153. ", "\n 154. ", "\n 155. ", "\n 156. ", "\n 157. ", "\n 158. ", "\n 159. ", "\n 160. ", "\n 161. ", "\n 162. ", "\n 163. ", "\n 164. ", "\n 165. ", "\n 166. ", "\n 167. ", "\n 168. ", "\n 169. ", "\n 170. ", "\n 171. ", "\n 172. ", "\n 173. ", "\n 174. ", "\n 175. ", "\n 176. ", "\n 177. ", "\n 178. ", "\n 179. ", "\n 180. ", "\n 181. ", "\n 182. ", "\n 183. ", "\n 184. ", "\n 185. ", "\n 186. ", "\n 187. ", "\n 188. ", "\n 189. ", "\n 190. ", "\n 191. ", "\n 192. ", "\n 193. ", "\n 194. ", "\n 195. ", "\n 196. ", "\n 197. ", "\n 198. ", "\n 199. ", "\n 200. ", "\n 201. ", "\n 202. ", "\n 203. ", "\n 204. ", "\n 205. ", "\n 206. ", "\n 207. ", "\n 208. ", "\n 209. ", "\n 210. ", "\n 211. ", "\n 212. ", "\n 213. ", "\n 214. ", "\n 215. ", "\n 216. ", "\n 217. ", "\n 218. ", "\n 219. ", "\n 220. ", "\n 221. ", "\n 222. ", "\n 223. ", "\n 224. ", "\n 225. ", "\n 226. ", "\n 227. ", "\n 228. ", "\n 229. ", "\n 230. ", "\n 231. ", "\n 232. ", "\n 233. ", "\n 234. ", "\n 235. ", "\n 236. ", "\n 237. ", "\n 238. ", "\n 239. ", "\n 240. ", "\n 241. ", "\n 242. ", "\n 243. ", "\n 244. ", "\n 245. ", "\n 246. ", "\n 247. ", "\n 248. ", "\n 249. ", "\n 250. ", "\n 251. ", "\n 252. ", "\n 253. ", "\n 254. ", "\n 255. ", "\n 256. ", "\n 257. ", "\n 258.", "\n\n 1. ", "Cover\n 2. ", "Title Page\n 3. ", "These Short Dark Days\n\n" ]

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[ "“It was a challenge and a long journey to get to the point we are right now,” said 30-year-old Misaye Asmamaw. ", "She’s speaking of her years as a frontline health extension worker in the Amhara region of Ethiopia – work she still talks about with joy, despite its challenges.", "\n\n“I love my people and the people love me,” she adds. “", "I believe I have accomplished a lot with this community.”", "\n\nAnd she has. ", "Thanks to a five-day training from USAID’s flagship Maternal and Children Survival Program (MCSP), Asmamaw is now able to treat the small babies who come to her outpost for care. ", "Previously, she could only refer them to the health center – and she felt helpless when many families did not adhere to the referral due to lack of transportation or money, or because they didn’t understand the higher-level care available there.", "\n\nBut after 8 years as an frontline health worker, Asmamaw heard about MCSP’s Newborns in Ethiopia Gaining Attention project – NEGA – when work began in her community. ", "Along with 2,489 other health extension workers in the Amhara region, she completed MCSP’s community-based newborn care training. ", "She is now one of more than 7,000 health extension workers in four MCSP-supported regions of the country to have done so.", "\n\nNationally, roughly 70% of deliveries in Ethiopia occur at home, and interventions such as prenatal and postnatal care are underutilized. ", "MCSP is combating this through competency-based trainings that stress early identification of pregnancies and follow-up through the delivery and the postnatal periods.", "\n\nFor Asmamaw, it wasn’t long before her new knowledge and training came in handy. ", "Biscay Health Post, where she works as the main health care provider, serves more than 5,600 people. ", "After Asmamaw’s training, a 22-year-old mother – Addise Yaregale – arrived to the health post seeking care.", "\n\nThe young woman suspected she was pregnant. ", "Three years prior, she had been pregnant for the first time, she told Asmamaw. ", "Initially too shy to see a doctor for prenatal care, it was only constant pain that eventually drove her to the nearby health center, she said. ", "From there, she was referred to the hospital in a nearby town, where she learned she had high blood pressure. ", "Her baby did not survive.", "\n\nAt Asmamaw’s urging, Yaregale agreed to go to the health center for an examination, where her pregnancy was confirmed. “", "Since then, I kept coming to the health post every month to check my blood pressure and the progress of my pregnancy,” the young woman said. ", "Given her previous loss and heartbreak, she was careful to seek Asmamaw’s care throughout her pregnancy.", "\n\nThis strong relationship with Asmamaw proved lifesaving shortly after her son, Saleamelak, was born. ", "At just two-weeks old, Yaregale’s infant son fell ill. ", "The new mother noticed that her son had a high temperature and was breathing abnormally. ", "She was worried and unsure what to do. ", "She immediately turned to Asmamaw for help.", "\n\nFortunately for Yaregale, Asmamaw knew exactly what to do. ", "No longer needing to refer, the frontline health worker examined Saleamelak carefully and correctly diagnosed him with pneumonia. ", "Thanks to the training, job aids, and supplies she received from MCSP, she was also able to treat him immediately with the correct medication.", "\n\nToday, Saleamelak is a thriving 14-month-old boy, and Asmamaw continues to check on his progress. ", "Yaregale tells her she only wants one more child.", "\n\nAbove: Asmamaw weighs Saleamelak while visiting the toddler and his mother, Yaregale, at home. ", "Courtesy of Karen Kasmauski/MCSP.", "\n\n“Helping mothers and children is the most satisfying work,” Asmamaw says proudly.", "\n\nWith trained frontline health extension workers like Asmamaw, MCSP in Ethiopia is building self-reliant communities while expanding access to high-quality health care for women and children. ", "To learn more about our work in Ethiopia, click here." ]

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[ "Please find the progress of our specific projects on the following NEL GitHub address:\n\nhttps://github.com/NewEconoLab\n\nNEODUN hardware wallet\n\n· We discussed the release of NEODUN twice，identified the direction of technical development for NEODUN and determined 22 product improvement details. ", "The software preparations(including hardware control program, drive and PC user interface) are expected to be finished and reach RC level by the end of this March.", "\n\n· NeoDun’s first batch of alpha version hardware is in production at the factory to keep pace with software development progress.", "\n\n· Considering that COZ has done a great deal of work before, NEL and have partnered with COZ for the development of NeoLink, a browser plug-in wallet, and make it to support NeoDun in particular. ", "Currently, NEL relevant developers have joined NeoLink’s development team and started analyzing and working on NeoLink.", "\n\nNNS Domain Name Service Client\n\nNNS top-level domain name service calls\n\n· Top-level domain names queries\n\n· The details of domain names\n\n· NNS registry service calls\n\n· Domain name registration\n\n· The owner of domain names queries\n\nNEO Light Wallet Interface sdk-ts\n\nRevisions on light wallet sdk TS version\n\nNew functions were added as follows:\n\n1. ", "Creating private keys\n\n2. ", "NEP6 wallet file can be saved\n\n3. ", "Added smart contract calls examples\n\n4. ", "Added conversion of addresses through scripthash examples.", "\n\nSome bugs were adjusted and fixed as follows:\n\n1. ", "The order of bytes shown by scripthash was reversed. ", "This bug is fixed.", "\n\n2. ", "One bug in the example of decompiling script was fixed.", "\n\nHelped adjust and fix the transaction deserialization example\n\nNEO block data into the library\n\n• Added all relevant transaction data indexed by address into the library to support browser and light wallet displaying address transaction history.", "\n\nNEO Block Data API\n\n• Added address history transaction interface to support browser and light wallet displaying address transaction history.", "\n\n• Interfaces with contract call class transactions added, support construction of contract call scripts, contract calls and sending contract calls. ", "Through this set of interfaces, DAPP developers can quickly gain the ability to control smart contracts using Java, Js, and so on without the need to gain a deep understanding of the underlying mechanisms.", "\n\n• Enhanced contract call interface. ", "The TXID can be returned after a successful contract call.", "\n\nBrowser light wallet\n\n• Dapp’s name import and query\n\n• Nep5 transfer function to its implement\n\n• Nep5’s assets display\n\nUI design:\n\nMain network: bright colors\n\nDeveloper function will be added on the browser in future. ", "Dark colors are adopted on the testnet for the sake of protecting developers eyes.", "\n\nLight wallet based on WeChat applet\n\no Liao Jinghui-a developer in the community\n\nhas implemented：\n\n• Private key generation, public key, address calculation\n\nGenerating algorithm design and implementation with special secure random number based on WeChat applet\n\nBlock height query, price polling, utxo polling, transfer of tokens\n\nThat’s it." ]

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[ "65 F.3d 170\n69 Fair Empl.", "Prac.", "Cas. (", "BNA) 768\nNOTICE: Seventh Circuit Rule 53(b)(2) states unpublished orders shall not be cited or used as precedent except to support a claim of res judicata, collateral estoppel or law of the case in any federal court within the circuit.", "Donald E. EARLY, Plaintiff-Appellant,v.BANKERS LIFE & CASUALTY COMPANY, Defendant-Appellee.", "\nNo. ", "94-2339.", "\nUnited States Court of Appeals, Seventh Circuit.", "\nArgued May 10, 1995.Decided Sept. 5, 1995.", "\n\nBefore POSNER, Chief Judge, and WOOD, Jr. and COFFEY, Circuit Judges.", "\n\nORDER\n\n1\nIn 1990, Donald Early [Early], the plaintiff-appellant, sued his former employer, Bankers Life & Casualty Company [Bankers], the defendant-appellee, claiming his discharge in November 1988 was because of his age in violation of the Age Discrimination in Employment Act [ADEA], 29 U.S.C. Secs. ", "621 et seq. ", " Bankers moved for summary judgment and the district court granted Bankers' motion. ", " Early appeals, and we affirm.", "\n\nI.\n\n2\nBefore addressing the merits of the summary judgment motion, there is a preliminary issue concerning Local Rules 12(m) and (n). ", " With each motion for summary judgment, Local Rule 12(m) requires that the moving party include any affidavits or other materials as referred to in Fed.", "R.Civ.", "Pro. ", "56(e), a supporting memorandum of law, and a statement of material facts as to which the moving party contends there is no genuine issue and that the moving party is entitled to judgment as a matter of law. ", " In response to the moving party's 12(m) statement, Local Rule 12(n) requires the opposing party to submit a concise response to each numbered paragraph in the moving party's statement, including specific references to affidavits, the record or other materials relied upon in the event of a disagreement. ", " \"All material facts set forth in the statement required of the moving party will be deemed to be admitted unless controverted by the statement of the opposing party.\" ", " Local Rule 12(n); see also LaSalle Bank Lake View v. Seguban, 54 F.3d 387, 389 (7th Cir.1995); Schulz v. Serfilco, Ltd., 965 F.2d 516, 519 (7th Cir.1992). ", " Local Rules 12(m) and (n) facilitate the notion that the nonmoving party may not avoid summary judgment by merely resting on its pleadings. ", " See Celotex Corp. v. Catrett, 477 U.S. 317, 324 (1986). ", " The requirements of Local Rules 12(m) and (n) have been strictly enforced. ", " Schulz, 965 F.2d at 519 (collecting cases). ", " Furthermore, whether Rule 12(n) is strictly or leniently enforced is at the discretion of the district judge. ", " Id. See also Bell, Boyd & Lloyd v. Tapy, 896 F.2d 1101, 1103 (7th Cir.1990).", "\n\n\n3\nWe have repeatedly upheld the strict enforcement of Rule 12(n). ", " Schulz, 965 F.2d at 519; Maksym v. Loesch, 937 F.2d 1237, 1240 (7th Cir.1991). ", " The district court found that the defect in Early's 12(n) statement was that he failed to respond to each numbered paragraph of Bankers' 12(m) statement. ", " Instead, Early attached a commentary on Bankers' fact portion of its memorandum of law as an exhibit to his response to Bankers' motion without reference to any supporting materials. ", " At argument, Early's attorney told us that the reason for his failure to comply with Rule 12(n) was that he was a one-man operation who did not have the resources of a large firm and had previously been overburdened with the preparation of the pre-trial order. ", " Needless to say, that is not a defense. ", " Local Rule 12(n) is intended to isolate and dispose of factually unsupported claims by requiring that the opposing party support its position with evidence--as opposed to mere allegations--establishing a genuine issue for trial. ", " MacDonald v. Commonwealth Edison Serv. ", " Annuity, 810 F.Supp. ", "239, 241 (N.D.Ill.1993). ", " The rule intentionally requires that denials to the 12(m) statements must be supported by specific facts. ", " The district court concluded that Early's 12(n) statement was not a concise response to Banker's 12(m) statement and therefore deemed Bankers' factual statements as admitted. ", " We find this was not an abuse of discretion. ", " The facts have been adequately set forth in the district court's Memorandum Opinion and Order. ", " Accordingly, we need only summarize the pertinent facts here.", "\n\n\n4\nEarly began his career with Bankers in November 1969 and continued until he was terminated in November 1988 when he was fifty-six years old. ", " Bankers is an Illinois corporation and is engaged in the business of marketing and selling insurance.", "\n\n\n5\nIn 1969, Early was first hired as a life insurance sales manager. ", " Early later held a variety of positions in the marketing division of Bankers, primarily positions concentrating on marketing life insurance and annuities.", "\n\n\n6\nIn 1984, Bankers was acquired by ICH and began restructuring the organization. ", " Bankers went from approximately 4,200 employees in 1984 to 2,800 in recent years. ", " The largest reduction occurred prior to 1987. ", " In 1988, forty-seven employees, including Early, were released.", "\n\n\n7\nEarly gradually ascended within the organization until around 1985. ", " In 1985, the then-president of Bankers decided to consolidate the actuarial department with the product development and marketing support division of the marketing department. ", " Early was moved into the actuarial division as part of this transfer. ", " While in the actuarial division, Early reported to two managers. ", " Both executives reported having difficulties in dealing with Early.", "\n\n\n8\nIn 1986, the marketing support in the actuarial department was transferred back to the marketing department. ", " Early, however, was not transferred back as part of this reorganization. ", " Some of Early's duties were reassigned to James Gaylord [Gaylord], Director of Agent Development Product Implementation, and Alice Bauer [Bauer], a member of Gaylord's staff. ", " Gaylord is three years older than Early and Bauer is four years older. ", " Bankers created a new position for Early so Early could continue with Bankers until he met the Rule of Seventy-five.1 The position was a fixed position with no merit increases. ", " Early did not have a staff and accepted assignments and reported directly to Gary Greenfield, Vice-President of Field Development [Greenfield].", "\n\n\n9\nEarly, Greenfield, and Jimmy Bentle, Senior Vice-President of Marketing [Bentle], attempted to identify other positions within the marketing department for which Early was qualified, but Early was not qualified for managerial positions in areas other than marketing life insurance. ", " In November 1988, Greenfield and Bentle agreed that Bankers had been unable to locate Early an appropriate position in the two years since his return to the marketing division and therefore could no longer justify the position. ", " In November 1988, Early was terminated.", "\n\n\n10\nIn November 1990, Early filed a complaint with the district court alleging that his termination violated the ADEA. ", " The district court granted Bankers' motion for summary judgment and this appeal followed.", "\n\nII.", "\n\n11\nTurning to the merits of the motion, we review a grant of summary judgment by considering all factual issues in the light most favorable to the nonmoving party (herein Early) and determining de novo whether there was no genuine issue of material fact and the moving party is entitled to judgment as a matter of law. ", " Cannon v. Wittek Companies, Int'l, 1995 WL 454014, * 2 (7th Cir. ", " August 2, 1995); Jean v. Dugan, 20 F.3d 255, 259 (7th Cir.1994). ", " The law of summary judgment is well-known, but is applied with added rigor in employment cases, where intent and credibility are crucial issues. ", " Kralman v. Illinois Dept. ", "of Veterans' Affairs, 23 F.3d 150, 152 (7th Cir.), ", "cert. ", "denied, 115 S.Ct. ", "359 (1994) (citing McCoy v. WGN Continental Broadcasting Co., 957 F.2d 368, 370-71 (7th Cir.1992)). ", " See also Sarsha v. Sears Roebuck & Co., 3 F.3d 1035, 1038 (7th Cir.1993).", "\n\nA.\n\n12\nIn order to show a violation of the ADEA, the plaintiff must demonstrate only that age was a determining factor in the employer's decision to discharge and not that it was the sole motivating factor. ", " McCoy, 957 F.2d at 371 (citations omitted). ", " Where, as in this case, the plaintiff can offer no direct evidence of age discrimination, the plaintiff may proceed by using the burden-shifting alternative under McDonnell Douglas Corp. v. Green, 411 U.S. 792, 802 (1973), and Texas Dept. ", "of Community Affairs v. Burdine, 450 U.S. 248, 253-56 (1981). ", " The plaintiff must first establish a prima facie case of discrimination by proving the following: (1) plaintiff was discharged or subjected to an adverse employment decision; (2) plaintiff was satisfying the employer's legitimate business expectations during his employment; (3) plaintiff was within the protected class; and (4) plaintiff was replaced by someone outside of the protected class. ", " Anderson v. Stauffer Chemical Co., 965 F.2d 397, 400 (7th Cir.1992) (citing LaMontagne v. American Convenience Prod., ", "Inc., 750 F.2d 1405, 1409 (7th Cir.1984)). ", " Once a plaintiff proves all four elements, a prima facie case is established and a rebuttable presumption is created that the employer's decision to terminate was based on the \"consideration of impermissible factors.\" ", " Burdine, 450 U.S. at 254. ", " See also DeLuca v. Winer Industries, 53 F.3d 793, 797 (7th Cir.1995). ", " The burden then shifts to the employer to rebut the presumption of discrimination by producing evidence that the plaintiff was rejected for a legitimate, nondiscriminatory reason. ", " Burdine, 450 U.S. at 254. ", " The employer does not have to persuade the court it was actually motivated by the proffered reasons; it is sufficient if the employer raises a genuine issue as to whether it discriminated against the plaintiff. ", " Id. Therefore, the ultimate burden of persuasion remains with the plaintiff. ", " St. Mary's Honor Center v. Hicks, 113 S.Ct. ", "2742, 2749 (1993).", "\n\nB.\n\n13\nIt is not contested that Early was at least forty years old and thus within the protected class at the time he was terminated. ", " The ADEA prohibits discrimination based on age to those who are over forty. ", " 29 U.S.C. Sec. ", "631(a). ", " Early was terminated when he was fifty-six years of age. ", " It is also not contested that Bankers terminated him. ", " Bankers contends, however, that Early did not perform satisfactorily and was not replaced by a younger worker.", "\n\n\n14\nThe uncontested facts indicate that Early was not satisfying the expectations of Bankers. ", " When Early was transferred into the actuarial division Early began reporting to Paul Janus, Senior Vice President and Chief Actuary [Janus]. ", " Janus reported having difficulties with Early because he believed Early did not focus on the issues. ", " Therefore, conversations and meetings with Early tended to be long and rambling. ", " He also expressed dissatisfaction because Early was not efficiently or timely completing matters. ", " Janus subsequently ordered Early to report to another actuarial manager, Bernard Rabinowitz [Rabinowitz]. ", " Rabinowitz stated that he also encountered the same sort of problems in dealing with Early. ", " Rabinowitz was particularly dissatisfied with Early's conduct as Chairman of the Life Annuity Product Committee. ", " Rabinowitz found that matters were not efficiently handled at the meetings because Early would reopen debates when it appeared the committee was ready to close, particularly when it involved a decision Early did not join. ", " Janus removed Early as Chairman because Early's conduct in the meetings contributed in a large part to delays in getting the insurance products through the committee process.", "\n\n\n15\nEarly argues by affidavits, including his own, that he was satisfactorily performing. ", " Early contradicts the Janus and Rabinowitz depositions with the depositions of Jimmy Bentle, James Gaylord, and Gary Greenfield. ", " Early asserts that each verified that he was doing well in his job and had a great deal of expertise in marketing life insurance products. ", " Bentle stated that he did not recall anybody being unhappy with Early to the degree that his performance would have prompted any decision to terminate him. ", " Bentle, however, directly following that statement admitted that he never had any firsthand knowledge of Early's performance or capabilities. ", " Bentle was aware of problems agents in the field had in dealing with Early. ", " Bentle stated he received reports that the agents were not receptive to having Early provide support to them.", "\n\n\n16\nBentle also testified that it was a business decision to return the product implementation division back to the marketing department because it was not operating well in the actuarial department. ", " As a result, by the time the product development division was transferred back to marketing, many of the functions Early performed were eliminated. ", " Bentle and Greenfield both stated that Bankers planned to delete Early's position if he were to leave the company; Early could have been terminated at this point, but because he was only two years away from meeting the Rule of Seventy-five, Bankers thought it would try to find another position that could utilize his expertise at his current income within the two year time frame. ", " As we have frequently stated:\n\n\n17\nThis court does \"not sit as a super-personnel department that reexamines an entity's business decisions.\" ", " McCoy v. WGN Continental Broadcasting Co., 957 F.2d 368, 373 (7th Cir.1992) (citation and internal quotations marks omitted). ", " \"No matter how medieval a firm's practices, no matter how high-handed its decisional process, no matter how mistaken the firm's managers, [the ADEA does] not interfere. ", " Poullard v. Rea Magnet Wire Co., 824 F.2d 557, 560 (7th Cir.), ", "cert. ", "denied, 484 U.S. 977 (1987).", "\n\n\n18\nSample v. Aldi, Inc., 1995 WL 446993, * 7 (7th Cir. ", " July 28, 1995) (brackets in original). ", " Rather our inquiry is limited to \"whether the employer gave an honest explanation of its behavior.\" ", " Poullard, 824 F.2d at 560.", "\n\n\n19\nEarly also offers the testimony of Gaylord. ", " Gaylord related that Early had very good product knowledge and was well educated in his specialty. ", " Product knowledge may be an imperative quality for an employee marketing life insurance products, but as is evidenced by the testimony of Bentle and Greenfield, Bankers expected other necessary qualities from its employees. ", " Early also contradicts the evidence with his own affidavit stating that he was a good communicator and was satisfying the needs of Bankers. ", " Early's responses only offer others' value judgments, and his own opinion that at certain times and in certain respects his work was good. ", " These contrary assessments of his performance, however, do not impeach the legitimacy of his employer's expectations. ", " The ADEA was not intended as a vehicle for judicial review of business decisions. ", " Kephart v. Institute of Gas Technology, 630 F.2d 1217, 1223 (7th Cir.1980). ", " Early also asserts that when Greenfield fired him, Greenfield stated that his performance had no impact on the decision. ", " Greenfield testified that he had made that statement because he was firing him. ", " As the district court noted, although favorable inferences must be drawn in favor of Early, the statement must be viewed in its proper context.", "\n\n\n20\nSecond, Early contends that his performance evaluation, which had a \"satisfactory\" rating by Janus, is evidence he was meeting Bankers' expectations. ", " This evaluation, however, was not as complimentary as Early asserts. ", " The rating is based on a scale ranging from unsatisfactory to satisfactory to superior to outstanding. ", " To say an employee is performing satisfactory on this type of scale is not evidence he is meeting the expectations of his employer. ", " The record reveals that Bankers did have legitimate concern for Early's performance, and \"so long as [Bankers] honestly believed that [Early] was not [performing up to standards], its business judgment will not be second-guessed by federal courts applying the ADEA.\" ", " McCoy, 957 F.2d at 373. ", " Further, it is significant that the employment decisions that Early now challenges occurred over a two year span of time.", "\n\n\n21\nBankers also contends that Early was not succeeded by a younger worker. ", " Bankers asserts that Early's duties were delegated to James Gaylord in the marketing department, who is three years older than Early. ", " Therefore, Bankers contends that Early failed to present any evidence that demonstrates either younger employees were treated more favorably or replaced Early. ", " Early argues that James White [White], who was thirty-eight years of age, took over 50 percent of his former job responsibilities, most significantly his duties concerning the Computer Analysis Proposal System program [CAPS]. ", " Early also asserts that the district court did not give proper credence to the affidavit of Tim Baumann, a younger member of Gaylord's staff, who was given some of Early's prior assignments. ", " While Early need not prove that persons who were not members of the protected class actually replaced him, he still must show that younger persons, whether above or below the age of forty, replaced him or received favorable treatment. ", " Kralman, 23 F.3d at 155-56.", "\n\n\n22\nTo support Early's argument, Early attached White's affidavit to his response to the motion for summary judgment as an attempt to infer that White took over approximately half of Early's job duties. ", " White, who was thirty-eight years old, was hired by Bankers in 1987. ", " White stated that he had later learned that the CAPS staff previously reported to Early and that he was responsible for their training and supervising.", "\n\n\n23\nThe district court also considered but dismissed White's statements that he performed relatively half of the functions Early previously performed on the grounds that the statements were not based on personal knowledge. ", " The record revealed that White did not start at Bankers until 1987 and therefore would not have had prior personal knowledge of what job duties Early previously performed. ", " Testimony about matters outside affiant's personal knowledge is not admissible in an affidavit used to support or resist the grant of summary judgment. ", " Visser v. Packing Engineering Assoc., ", "Inc., 924 F.2d 655, 659 (7th Cir.1991). ", " Further, Early asserts that White took over 50 percent of his duties, but there is no other admissible evidence to support that either White assumed 50 percent of Early's job responsibilities or that the 50 percent figure is even an accurate estimation. ", " There was also no evidence that Early was ever responsible for the CAPS program and then later lost that responsibility.", "\n\n\n24\nEarly also argued that Tim Baumann, a younger employee on Gaylord's staff, also assumed a portion of what had been Early's duties of preparing marketing support materials for life insurance and annuities. ", " Baumann admitted that he was younger than Early and had assumed his duties. ", " However, the district court found, and the record supports, that Baumann was a lower-level employee on Gaylord's staff who received his assignments from Gaylord. ", " Gaylord's job description had been expanded in 1986 to include some of Early's prior responsibilities. ", " Therefore, it is not unreasonable nor evidence of age discrimination that Gaylord in turn delegated some of these duties to his staff members.", "\n\n\n25\nThe district court went on to find that there were several nonpretextual reasons for Bankers' termination of Early. ", " Because, however, we find that Early fails to meet the prima facie case requirements, our analysis need not continue. ", " Accordingly, the district court's summary judgment is AFFIRMED.", "\n\n\n\n1\n The Rule of Seventy-Five is a Bankers' policy by which employees can become eligible for early retirement based upon a combination of their age and their years of service. ", " The retirees also have greater accessibility to company health insurance benefits. ", " Early needed approximately two more years of employment to qualify\n\n\n" ]

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[ "Prevalence of Clostridium difficile infection presenting to US EDs.", "\nThe objective of the study is to determine the prevalence of Clostridium difficile infection (CDI) presenting to emergency departments (EDs) in the United States. ", "Secondary objectives included defining the burden of CDI. ", "This is a retrospective, observational cohort study of 2006-2010 Nationwide Emergency Department Sample database of 980 US hospital EDs in 29 states. ", "Prevalence, mortality rate, length of stay, hospital charges, and endemicity were measured. ", "A total of 474513 patients with CDI-related ED visits were identified. ", "From 2006 to 2010, the prevalence of CDI increased from 26.2 to 33.1 per 100,000 population (P<.001). ", "The number of CDI-related ED cases increased 26.1% (P<.001) over the study period: 18.6% from 2006 to 2007 (P<.001), 4.3% from 2007 to 2008 (P=.46), 1.8% from 2008 to 2009 (P=.73), and 0.13% from 2009 to 2010 (P=.95). ", "Emergency department visits occurred more frequently with individuals 85 years or older (relative risk [RR], 13.74; P<.001), females (RR, 1.77; P<.001) and in the northeast United States (RR, 1.42; P<.001). ", "From 2009 to 2010, the mortality rate decreased 17.9% (P=.01). ", "The prevalence of CDI presenting to EDs increased each year from 2006 to 2010; however, the rate of increase slowed from each year to the next. ", "The mortality rate increased from 2006 to 2009 and decreased significantly from 2009 to 2010. ", "C difficile infection visits presenting to EDs occurred more frequently with older individuals, females, and in the northeast." ]

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[ "This blog is written by a journalist based in Mumbai who writes about cities, the environment, developmental issues, the media, women and many other subjects.", "The title 'ulti khopdi' is a Hindi phrase referring to someone who likes to look at things from the other side.", "\n\nThursday, November 05, 2009\n\nPropaganda wars, such as the recent rumour about the “Love Jehad”, undermine women’s right to choose as citizens of a democracy.", "\n\nIn the war of competing ideologies, women are often caught in the middle.", "\n\nPhoto: Akhilesh Kumar In a free country? ", "Protesting the attack on women by Sri Ram Sene in Mangalore.", "\n\nIn a recent television discussion on the challenge posed by the spread of Naxalism in India, several participants spoke glowingly about the strength of Indian democracy and how all Indians should celebrate the freedom and tolerance that exists in thi s country. ", "If you constantly compare yourself to countries that work under different systems of government, then perhaps you can persuade yourself to believe that this is indeed a country that allows all its citizens free choice.", "\n\nThe reality, as we know, is very different. ", "There is little of free choice for the small and marginal farmers whose land is forcibly acquired for industries, special economic zones, large dams or other infrastructure. ", "There is no free choice for Adivasis demanding their rights when the land they have nurtured and depend on is upturned for the mineral wealth that lies beneath it. ", "And there is no such thing as free choice for the majority of Indian women whose life choices are pre-determined by patriarchy, community, caste, religion or social class. ", "If any of them dare to break out and actually make a free choice, they risk at worst death and at best being outcast.", "\n\nStrange rumours\n\nIt is against this background that we have the strange case of stories circulating first in Kerala and then in Dakshina Kannada (South Karnataka) about a so-called “Love Jehad” where Hindu girls were allegedly being lured by Muslim youth and forced to convert to Islam. ", "The rumour mill began with a report in a Kerala newspaper and was soon picked up by the Hindu Janajagruti Samiti (which claims to be “uniting Hindus globally”) and dozens of other similar sectarian groups in Dakshina Kannada. ", "Through the Internet, public demonstrations and statements, they claimed that thousands of Hindu girls were being lured and converted to Islam in Kerala and Karnataka and that the State must intervene.", "\n\nThe courts were also brought into the act, first the Kerala High Court that ordered an inquiry followed by the Karnataka High Court. ", "The Director General of Police, Kerala has already reported to the Kerala High Court that there is no such group or organisation called “Love Jehad” or “Romeo Jehad” (another name doing the rounds). ", "But the reports are being investigated. ", "The Karnataka High Court has also instituted an inquiry and holds that the issue has “national ramifications concerning security, besides the question of unlawful trafficking of women.”", "\n\nProved baseless\n\nLike the Kerala police, the Dakshina Kannada police has also clarified that the rumour is baseless in the face of facts. ", "The Hindu Janajagruti Samiti (HJS) claims that 3,000 Hindu girls are “missing” in Dakshina Kannada and 30,000 in the rest of the state. ", "The police have clarified that till the end of September 2009, there were reports of 404 missing girls of whom the police had traced 332. ", "By end October, only 57 women were still missing. ", "Furthermore, the police have clarified that where women were missing because they had eloped, there were many cases of non-Hindus as well as Hindus eloping with Hindus.", "\n\nThe Dakshina Kannada police also explained that in one particular case, that of a 22-year-old girl who had been missing since June and who was rumoured to have fallen victim to this so-called “Love Jehad”, in fact, she had been murdered by a Hindu man, a serial killer who confessed to his crime.", "\n\nIf the Kerala police and the Dakshina Kannada police are right, it is evident that this “Love Jehad” rumour is a figment of the same imagination that concluded that women drinking at pubs in Mangalore were a threat to “Indian” culture. ", "Yes, the same Pramod Mutalik of the Sri Ram Sene and the Mangalore pub attack fame has now re-emerged to fight against “terrorism and love Jehad”.", "\n\nThe story does not end with the so-called Love Jehad. ", "In Kerala, the Bharatiya Janata Party’s mouthpiece, Janmabhumi, sacked a woman journalist who got married to a Christian and converted. ", "They claimed they could not employ a convert because they were against conversions.", "\n\nOne could laugh off this as the desperate and ridiculous attempts of the Hindu Right to whip up anti-Muslim sentiment in any way they can. ", "But we cannot and should not take it lightly. ", "Every Indian citizen is guaranteed freedom of choice under the Constitution.", "\n\nNo comments:\n\nMy profile\n\nJournalist, columnist, writer based in Mumbai. ", "Author of \"Rediscovering Dharavi: Stories from Asia's largest slum\" (Penguin, 2000). ", "Worked with The Hindu, Times of India, Indian Express and Himmat Weekly.", "\nOther books include \"Whose News? ", "The Media and Women's Issues\" edited with Ammu Joseph (published by Sage 1994/2006), \"Terror Counter-Terror: Women Speak Out\" edited with Ammu Joesph (published by Kali for Women, 2003) and \"Missing: Half the Story, Journalism as if Gender Matters\" (published by Zubaan, 2010).", "\nRegular columns in The Hindu, Sunday Magazine and on The Hoot (www.thehoot.org)." ]

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[ "you-are-a-wildman:\n\nyou-are-a-wildman:\n\nthevolga: theres no reason hermione shouldn’t be black an i’d like fans who get worked up about it and upset to just admit they’re racist err.. except the fact that that’s not how JK Rowling made her?", "\n\nIn case you wanted proof (for my argument and that I have too much time on my hands), here are all the records of Hermione’s colouring that I could find in the books I had (no philosophers stone):\n\nDeathly Hallows\n\nChapter 6: “Hermione, who had turned pink”\n\nChapter 8: “Hermione looked rather pink”\n\nChapter 11: “Hermione turned pink”\n\nChapter 14: “Hermione, who was also rather pale”\n\nChapter 19: “Hermione turned a fiery shade of scarlet”\n\nChapter 24: “Hermione was… pale and unsteady on her feet”\n\nChapter 28: “Hermione had turned red”\n\nHalf Blood Prince\n\nChapter 9: “Hermione, who was red-faced”\n\nChapter 11: “Hermione turned a very deep shade of pink”\n\nChapter 12: “Hermione, her cheeks reddening”\n\nChapter 14: “Hermione, who for some reason had turned a bright, boiling scarlet”\n\nChapter 17: “Hermione was hurrying towards them, very pink-faced”\n\nChapter 19: “Hermione… having hurtled, white-faced, up to Harry”\n\nChapter 21: “Hermione turned faintly pink”\n\nChapter 25: “Hermione, red patches blazing in her cheeks”\n\nOrder of the Phoenix\n\nChapter 9: “She turned red”\n\nChapter 13: “…said Hermione at once, though her face was turning pink”\n\nChapter 16: “her face was a little pink”\n\nChapter 23: “her face was pink with cold”\n\nChapter 30: “Hermione’s face was pale and set”\n\nGoblet of Fire\n\nChapter 6: “Hermione and Ginny came into the kitchen, both looking pale and drowsy”\n\nChapter 8: “Hermione, who went slightly pink”\n\nChapter 15: “Hermione went very pink”; “Hermione, who had turned rather pink again”\n\nChapter 19: “Hermione went slightly pink”\n\nChapter 23: “Hermione, the pink patches on her cheeks glowing”; Ron and Hermione were “each scarlet in the face”\n\nChapter 24: “Hermione went slightly pink”\n\nChapter 27: “Hermione blushed scarlet”; “Hermione was blushing scarlet now”\n\nChapter 29: “Hermione flushed pink with pleasure”\n\nPrisoner of Azkaban\n\nChapter 7: “Hermione went as pink as Neville”\n\nChapter 8: “Ron and Hermione had just turned up in the common room, pink-faced from the cold wind”\n\nChapter 11: “She was still pink in the face”\n\nChamber of Secrets\n\nChapter 10: “There were bright pink patches on her cheeks”\n\nSo, sure, JK Rowling never explicitly states Hermione’s race, but given how often she seems to turn pink/red, I doubt she could be very dark skinned. ", "There’s enough racism out there without us searching for it where it doesn’t need to be found :)" ]

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[ "Stem cells and genetic disease.", "\nStem cell research is now a very broad field encompassing cells derived from all stages of life from the embryonic stem cells of the early blastocyst through to the adult stem cells of many tissues of the body. ", "Adult stem cells from a variety of tissues are proving to be pluripotent and can differentiate into cell types different from the tissues from which they derive. ", "Pre-clinical animal models indicate that adult stem cells do not cause tumours, not even, teratomas when transplanted. ", "These properties, combined with the possibility of autologous transplantation, indicate significant advantages over embryonic stem cells in many proposed clinical applications." ]

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[ " 114 T.C. No. ", "8\n\n\n\n UNITED STATES TAX COURT\n\n\n\n STEPHEN W. WILLIAMS, Petitioner v.\n COMMISSIONER OF INTERNAL REVENUE, Respondent\n\n\n\nDocket No. ", "23179-97. ", " Filed March 1, 2000.", "\n\n\n\n P mailed two Forms 1040, U.S. Individual Income\nTax Return, for 1991 to the IRS. ", "The first Form 1040\nincluded a deduction for “Non Taxable Compensation”\nequal to P’s total income, and P failed to sign it. ", "P\nstipulated that this Form 1040 is not a valid return.", "\nIn the second Form 1040, P reported taxes owed of\n$36,621. ", "P however attached a disclaimer statement to\nthe second Form 1040 stating that he denied all tax\nliability and did not admit that the stated amount of\ntax was due.", "\n Held: P is liable for the deficiency.", "\n Held, further, P’s second Form 1040 is not a valid\nreturn; therefore, P is not liable for the accuracy-\nrelated penalty pursuant to sec. ", "6662(a), I.R.C.\n Held, further, P is liable for the addition to tax\npursuant to sec. ", "6651(a)(1), I.R.C.\n Held, further, P is liable for a penalty under\nsec. ", "6673, I.R.C.\n\f - 2 -\n\n Stephen W. Williams, pro se.", "\n\n M. Kathryn Bellis and Marion S. Friedman, for respondent.", "\n\n\n OPINION\n\n VASQUEZ, Judge: Respondent determined a deficiency of\n\n$42,934, an addition to tax pursuant to section 6651(a)(1) of\n\n$9,492, and an accuracy-related penalty pursuant to section\n\n6662(a) of $8,587 in petitioner’s 1991 Federal income tax.1\n\n Pursuant to Rule 122, the parties submitted this case fully\n\nstipulated. ", " The stipulations of fact, the supplemental\n\nstipulations of fact, and the attached exhibits are incorporated\n\nherein by this reference. ", " At the time the petition was filed,\n\npetitioner resided in Spring, Texas.", "\n\n After concessions,2 the issues for decision are: (1)\n\nWhether petitioner is liable for the deficiency determined by\n\nrespondent in petitioner’s 1991 taxes; (2) whether petitioner’s\n\nForm 1040, U.S. Individual Income Tax Return, containing a\n\ndisclaimer statement constituted a valid return, and if so,\n\nwhether petitioner is liable for a penalty pursuant to section\n\n6662; (3) whether petitioner is liable for an addition to tax\n\n\n\n 1\n Unless otherwise indicated, all section references are to\nthe Internal Revenue Code in effect for 1991, and all Rule\nreferences are to the Tax Court Rules of Practice and Procedure.", "\n 2\n Respondent concedes that petitioner is entitled to a head\nof household filing status and a dependency exemption deduction\nfor his son, Steve W. Williams.", "\n\f - 3 -\n\npursuant to section 6651(a)(1); and (4) whether petitioner is\n\nliable for a penalty pursuant to section 6673.", "\n\nBackground\n\n During 1991, petitioner was employed as a veterinarian by\n\nStephen W. Williams P.C., an S corporation (Williams P.C.).", "\n\nPetitioner received extensions of time for filing his 1991 income\n\ntax return until October 15, 1992.", "\n\n On October 1, 1994, petitioner mailed a Form 1040 for 1991\n\nto the Internal Revenue Service (IRS). ", " Petitioner altered the\n\nForm 1040 (altered 1040) by marking through the captions on lines\n\n7 and 18 and typing his own caption, “Non Taxable Compensation”.", "\n\nPetitioner reported income of $20,500 and $135,861 on lines 7 and\n\n18, respectively. ", " Next, petitioner whited out the captions on\n\nlines 24a and b and typed in “Non Taxable Compensation Eisner v.\n\nMacomber 252 U.S. 189\". ", " Petitioner reported a deduction of\n\n$156,861 on line 24a, which brought his adjusted gross income to\n\n$0. ", " Petitioner did not sign the altered 1040.", "\n\n The IRS treated the altered 1040 as a frivolous return under\n\nsection 6702 and fined petitioner $500. ", " Petitioner stipulated\n\nthat the altered 1040 was a frivolous return and not a return\n\nwithin the meaning of section 6501(a).", "\n\n On November 21, 1996, petitioner mailed another Form 1040\n\n(disclaimer 1040) for 1991 to the IRS. ", " On the disclaimer 1040,\n\npetitioner reported adjusted gross income of $150,852 consisting\n\f - 4 -\n\nof wages of $20,500, taxable interest income of $14, a capital\n\nloss of ($2,986), and rents and partnership income of $133,324.", "\n\nPetitioner reported a total tax of $41,586 and an amount owed of\n\n$36,621. ", " Petitioner, this time, did not strike or change any\n\nlanguage on the form. ", " Instead, beside the amount owed reported\n\non line 64, petitioner placed an asterisk. ", " At the bottom of the\n\npage, petitioner stated that the asterisk denoted “The admitted\n\nliability is zero. ", " See attached Disclaimer Statement.” ", " The\n\nattached disclaimer statement (the disclaimer) read in part:\n\n The above named taxpayer respectfully declines to\n volunteer concerning assessment and payment of any tax\n balance due on the return or any redetermination of\n said tax. ", "Be it known that the above said taxpayer,\n therefore, denies tax liability and does not admit that\n the stated amount of tax on return is due and\n collectable. * * *", "\n\nPetitioner signed the disclaimer 1040.", "\n\n Except for the altered 1040 and the disclaimer 1040,\n\npetitioner did not mail to or file with the IRS any other Forms\n\n1040 for 1991.", "\n\n During 1991, petitioner received income and incurred losses\n\nas follows:\n\n Wages from Williams P.C. $20,500\n Interest from Vista Properties 14\n (Vista)\n Interest from Charles Schwab 3\n Net short term capital loss (2,986)\n Rents from Williams P.C. 29,000\n Nonpassive loss from Vista (1,637)\n Nonpassive income from\n Williams P.C. 105,961\n Rents from Summit Outdoor\n Advertising (Summit) 900\n\f - 5 -\n\nDiscussion\n\nI. Deficiency Liability\n\n Petitioner does not challenge either the facts on which\n\nrespondent’s determination is based or respondent’s calculation\n\nof tax. ", " In fact, respondent based the computation of the\n\ndeficiency on the amounts reported by petitioner on the altered\n\n1040 and the disclaimer 1040. ", " Petitioner, nevertheless, contends\n\nhe is not liable for the deficiency. ", " Petitioner claims that (1)\n\nhe did not volunteer to self-assess or pay his taxes, and he\n\ntherefore cannot be held liable for any deficiency; (2) his\n\nincome is not from any of the sources listed in section 1.861-\n\n8(a), Income Tax Regs., ", "and thus is not taxable; and (3) the\n\nnotice of deficiency was improperly issued because petitioner\n\ndisclaimed the tax liability shown on the return.", "\n\n Petitioner’s arguments are reminiscent of tax-protester\n\nrhetoric that has been universally rejected by this and other\n\ncourts. ", " We shall not painstakingly address petitioner’s\n\nassertions “with somber reasoning and copious citation of\n\nprecedent; to do so might suggest that these arguments have some\n\ncolorable merit.” ", " Crain v. Commissioner, 737 F.2d 1417, 1417\n\n(5th Cir. ", "1984). ", " Accordingly, we conclude that petitioner is\n\nliable for the deficiency determined by respondent.", "\n\nII. ", " Accuracy-related Penalty\n\n Respondent determined that petitioner is liable for an\n\naccuracy-related penalty pursuant to section 6662(a) for his\n\f - 6 -\n\nunderpayment of tax attributable to negligence or disregard of\n\nrules or regulations. ", " The penalty under section 6662(a) applies\n\nonly where a return has been filed. ", " See sec. ", "6664(b). ", " We\n\ntherefore must determine whether the disclaimer 1040 constitutes\n\na valid return.", "\n\n Generally, pursuant to section 6011(a), taxpayers are\n\nrequired to file returns that conform to the forms and\n\nregulations prescribed by the Secretary. ", " See sec. ", "1.6011-1(a),\n\nIncome Tax Regs. ", " The Form 1040 is the form prescribed by the\n\nSecretary for use by individual taxpayers in filing returns. ", " See\n\nSteines v. Commissioner, T.C. Memo. ", "1991-588.", "\n\n Section 6065 requires returns to contain or be verified by a\n\nwritten declaration that they are made under the penalties of\n\nperjury. ", " To facilitate a taxpayer’s compliance with this\n\nrequirement, the Form 1040 contains a preprinted jurat.3 By\n\nsigning the jurat included within the Form 1040, a taxpayer\n\nsatisfies the requirement that his return be executed under\n\npenalty of perjury. ", " See Sloan v. Commissioner, 102 T.C. 137,\n\n146-147 (1994), affd. ", "53 F.3d 799 (7th Cir. ", "1995); Sochia v.\n\nCommissioner, T.C. Memo. ", "1998-294.", "\n\n The U.S. Supreme Court has also held that certain documents\n\n\n\n 3\n The jurat is the portion of the Form 1040 which reads:\n“Under penalties of perjury, I declare that I have examined this\nreturn and accompanying schedules and statements, and to the best\nof my knowledge and belief, they are true, correct, and\ncomplete.”", "\n\f - 7 -\n\ndrafted by taxpayers that do not comply with the forms prescribed\n\nby the Secretary will nevertheless be treated as valid returns,\n\nfor purposes of the statute of limitations, if they contain\n\ncertain elements. ", " See Badaracco v. Commissioner, 464 U.S. 386\n\n(1984); Commissioner v. Lane-Wells Co., 321 U.S. 219 (1944);\n\nZellerbach Pager Co. v. Helvering, 293 U.S. 172 (1934); Lucas v.\n\nPilliod Lumber Co., 281 U.S. 245 (1930); Florsheim Bros. Drygoods\n\nCo. v. United States, 280 U.S. 453 (1930). ", " In Beard v.\n\nCommissioner, 82 T.C. 766, 777 (1984), affd. ", "793 F.2d 139 (6th\n\nCir. ", "1986), we summarized the Supreme Court’s test for a valid\n\nreturn as follows:\n\n First, there must be sufficient data to calculate [the]\n tax liability; second, the document must purport to be\n a return; third, there must be an honest and reasonable\n attempt to satisfy the requirements of the tax law; and\n fourth, the taxpayer must execute the return under\n penalties of perjury.", "\n\nThe fourth requirement is the same requirement found in section\n\n6065 and can be satisfied by signing the jurat on the Form 1040.", "\n\n In Beard, we applied the Supreme Court’s test in our\n\nanalysis of whether the document at issue was a tax return for\n\npurposes of section 6651(a)(1). ", " See id.; see also Martin\n\nFireproofing Profit Sharing Plan & Trust v. Commissioner, 92 T.C.\n\n1173 (1989) (applying Beard in section 6033 context); Dunham v.\n\nCommissioner, T.C. Memo. ", "1998-52 (applying Beard in the section\n\n6651(f) context). ", " We see no reason why the same test should not\n\napply in determining whether a document constitutes a tax return\n\f - 8 -\n\nfor purposes of section 6662(a).", "\n\n We first determine whether the disclaimer 1040 complies with\n\nthe form prescribed by the Secretary. ", " Although petitioner used a\n\nForm 1040, petitioner added the disclaimer to the form.", "\n\nRespondent contends that the addition of the disclaimer to the\n\nForm 1040 vitiated petitioner’s signature under the jurat.", "\n\n In the past, we have analyzed the effect of tax protesters’\n\nalterations to the Form 1040, and in particular to the jurat, and\n\ndetermined whether the altered Form 1040 constituted a valid\n\nreturn. ", " In the beginning, tax protesters simply crossed out the\n\nentire text of the jurat, and we held that the Forms 1040 were\n\nnot valid returns. ", " See Cupp v. Commissioner, 65 T.C. 68, 78-79,\n\naffd. ", "without published opinion 559 F.2d 1207 (3d Cir. ", "1977); see\n\nalso Mosher v. Internal Revenue Service, 775 F.2d 1292, 1294 (5th\n\nCir. ", "1985)(per curiam). ", " Next, tax protesters deleted particular\n\nwords from the jurat such as “under penalties of perjury” and/or\n\n“true, correct, and complete”. ", " In those cases, we held that the\n\nForms 1040 did not constitute valid returns. ", " See Sochia v.\n\nCommissioner, supra; Jenkins v. Commissioner, T.C. Memo. ", "1989-\n\n617.", "\n\n Recently, tax protesters have begun to add to rather than\n\nstrike out the text of the jurat. ", " We have generally found that\n\nthe addition of language to the jurat invalidated the Form 1040\n\f - 9 -\n\nas a return.4 See Andrews v. Commissioner, T.C. Memo. ", "1999-281;\n\nHodge v. Commissioner, T.C. Memo. ", "1998-242; Counts v.\n\nCommissioner, T.C. Memo. ", "1984-561. ", " For example, in Sloan v.\n\nCommissioner, supra at 141, immediately following the preprinted\n\ntext of the jurat and immediately above the taxpayer’s signature\n\n(i.e., within the jurat box), the taxpayer wrote “Denial and\n\nDisclaimer attached as part of this Form.” ", " The following\n\nstatement was attached to the Form 1040:\n\n\n\n\n 4\n We note that some courts have found that the addition of\nprotest language to the Form 1040 will not invalidate the form as\na return. ", "In McCormick v. Peterson, 73 AFTR 2d 94-597, 94-1 USTC\npar. ", "50,026 (E.D.N.Y. 1993), the court held that the addition of\nthe words “under protest” to the jurat did not alter the meaning\nof the jurat and thus did not invalidate the Form 1040 as a\nreturn; see also Berger v. Commissioner, T.C. Memo. ", "1996-76\n(holding the addition of a disclaimer statement which declared\nthat the return was signed “under duress by court order” did not\nalter the jurat in such a way as to invalidate the return); Todd\nv. United States, 849 F.2d 365, 367 (9th Cir. ", "1988) (holding that\nthe addition of the words “signed involuntarily under penalty of\nstatutory punishment” below the jurat did not make the Form 1040\na frivolous return under section 6702). ", "But see In re Schmitt v.\nUnited States, 140 Bankr. ", "571, 572 (Bankr. ", "W.D. Okla. 1992)\n(holding the addition of the words “signed under duress see\nstatement attached” to the jurat invalidated the return).", "\n\f - 10 -\n\n DENIAL AND DISCLAIMER\n OF LORIN G. SLOAN\n FOR THE YEAR\n I submit this “Denial and Disclaimer” as an attachment\n to the IRS Form 1040 for the year stated above. ", "I deny\n that I am liable or made liable for any “1040 income\n tax” for the above stated year. ", "I claim all of my\n rights and waive none of them merely for exercising my\n right to work. ", "I submit the 1040 form to prevent the\n further theft of my property and loss of my liberty.", "\n My signature on the form is not an admission of\n jurisdiction or submission to subject status. ", "I\n “disclaim liability” for any tax shown on the form.", "\n [Id. at 141.]", "\n\n We stated in Sloan that the above “Denial and Disclaimer”\n\nstatement “[raised] serious questions about whether petitioner\n\n[was] ‘denying’ the accuracy of the information contained in the\n\nreturn, ‘disclaiming’ the jurat altogether, or simply protesting\n\nthe tax laws.” ", " Id. at 145. ", " We held that, by adding the\n\ndisclaimer to the jurat, the return was invalidated.", "\n\n In affirming our decision in Sloan, the U.S. Court of\n\nAppeals for the Seventh Circuit stated in part:\n\n It is a close question whether the “Denial &\n Disclaimer” should be interpreted in this light–-that\n is, as an attempt to retract or qualify the jurat.", "\n * * * But we think that the Internal Revenue Service\n should be entitled to construe alterations of the jurat\n against the taxpayer, at least when there is any doubt.", "\n * * * The government receives tens of millions of tax\n returns and if taxpayers start embellishing the jurat\n the staggering task of processing all these returns may\n become entirely unmanageable. [", "Sloan v. Commissioner,\n 53 F.3d at 800.]", "\n\n Against the foregoing backdrop, we consider for the first\n\ntime whether disclaimer language added outside the jurat box\n\ninvalidates the Form 1040 as a return because it fails to comply\n\f - 11 -\n\nwith the form prescribed by the Secretary. ", " Petitioner argues\n\nthat his disclaimer is “nowhere near the jurat;” therefore, he\n\nexecuted a valid return.", "\n\n It is true that petitioner has carefully avoided adding\n\nlanguage within the jurat box. ", " We, however, believe that this is\n\njust another attempt by a taxpayer to alter the essence of the\n\njurat and the Form 1040 without actually tampering with the\n\npreprinted form. ", " While not physically deleting, altering, or\n\nadding words to the jurat, the disclaimer negated the meaning of\n\nthe jurat. ", " The jurat states that the signatory declares, under\n\npenalties of perjury, that the return is true, correct, and\n\ncomplete. ", " The disclaimer at a minimum calls into question the\n\nveracity, accuracy, and completeness of the disclaimer 1040 and\n\ncan be construed as a denial of the jurat altogether. ", " Although\n\npetitioner physically signed the return below the jurat, his\n\ndisclaimer, in effect, vitiated his verification of the\n\ntruthfulness of the return as required by the regulations\n\nprescribed by the Secretary and by section 6065.", "\n\n We have previously stated that the acceptance of documents\n\nwhich vary from the form prescribed by the Secretary\n\n adversely affects the form’s useability by respondent.", "\n The tampered form, * * *, must be handled by special\n procedures and must be withdrawn from normal processing\n channels. * * *, ", "it substantially impedes the\n Commissioner’s physical task of handling and verifying\n tax returns. * * * [", "Beard v. Commissioner, 82 T.C. at\n 776-777.]", "\n\nSee also Reiff v. Commissioner, 77 T.C. 1169, 1177 (1981). ", " We\n\f - 12 -\n\nrefuse to require respondent to engage in guessing games to\n\ndetermine what disclaimers like this one mean. ", " To require such\n\nwould drastically hinder the Commissioner’s ability to process\n\nreturns effectively and efficiently. ", " We find that the disclaimer\n\n1040 does not comport with the form prescribed by the Secretary.", "\n\n The disclaimer 1040 may, nevertheless, be treated as a valid\n\nreturn if it contains the four elements outlined in the Supreme\n\nCourt’s test. ", " Under the Supreme Court’s test, in order for a\n\ndocument to be a valid return, a taxpayer must execute the\n\ndocument under penalties of perjury. ", " As we found above, by his\n\ndisclaimer, petitioner altered the meaning of the jurat to the\n\nextent that it cannot be said that petitioner executed the\n\ndocument under penalties of perjury.", "\n\n Additionally, under the Supreme Court’s test, there must be\n\nan honest and reasonable attempt to satisfy the requirements of\n\nthe tax laws. ", " The disclaimer contained tax protester legal\n\ngibberish that has been consistently rejected by courts.", "\n\nPetitioner’s denial of tax liability and refusal to self-assess\n\ndoes not evidence a reasonable attempt to satisfy his obligation\n\nto file a return under the tax laws. ", " We find that petitioner has\n\nnot filed a valid return under the Supreme Court’s test.", "\n\n We conclude that the disclaimer 1040 does not constitute a\n\nvalid return; therefore, petitioner is not liable for the penalty\n\npursuant to section 6662(a).", "\n\f - 13 -\n\nIII. ", "Addition to Tax\n\n Respondent determined that petitioner is liable for an\n\naddition to tax pursuant to section 6651(a)(1). ", " Section\n\n6651(a)(1) imposes an addition to tax for failure to file a\n\nreturn on the date prescribed (determined with regard to any\n\nextension of time for filing), unless the taxpayer can establish\n\nthat such failure is due to reasonable cause and not due to\n\nwillful neglect. ", " The taxpayer has the burden of proving the\n\naddition is improper. ", " See Rule 142(a); United States v. Boyle,\n\n469 U.S. 241, 245 (1985). ", " The amount added to the tax under this\n\nsection is 5 percent for each month or faction thereof during\n\nwhich the return is late, up to a maximum of 25 percent. ", " See\n\nsec. ", "6651(a)(1).", "\n\n The due date for petitioner’s 1991 return, as extended, was\n\nOctober 15, 1992. ", " Petitioner stipulated that the altered 1040\n\nwas mailed on October 1, 1994, almost 2 years late. ", " Petitioner\n\nmailed the disclaimer 1040 on November 21, 1996. ", " Regardless of\n\nwhether either of these forms was a valid return, neither was\n\nfiled within 5 months of the extended due date. ", " Petitioner\n\noffered no evidence showing that his failure to file timely was\n\ndue to reasonable cause and not due to willful neglect.", "\n\nAccordingly, we hold petitioner is liable for the maximum\n\naddition to tax under section 6651(a)(1).", "\n\f - 14 -\n\nIV. ", " Frivolous Suit\n\n Under section 6673, this Court may require a taxpayer to pay\n\na penalty not to exceed $25,000 if the taxpayer takes a frivolous\n\nposition in the proceeding or institutes the proceeding primarily\n\nfor delay. ", " A position maintained by the taxpayer is “frivolous”\n\nwhere it is “contrary to established law and unsupported by a\n\nreasoned, colorable argument for change in the law.” ", " Coleman v.\n\nCommissioner, 791 F.2d 68, 71 (7th Cir. ", "1986). ", " Petitioner’s\n\narguments concerning the underlying deficiency amount to tax\n\nprotester rhetoric and are manifestly frivolous and groundless.", "\n\nHe has wasted the time and resources of this Court. ", " Accordingly,\n\nwe shall impose a penalty of $5,000 pursuant to section 6673.", "\n\n To the extent not herein discussed, we have considered the\n\nparties’ other arguments and found them to be meritless.", "\n\n To reflect the foregoing,\n\n Decision will be entered\n\n under Rule 155.", "\n\f" ]

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[ "TheGunBlog.ca — Michael Tibollo, Ontario’s Minister of Community Safety and Correctional Services, backed hunters and sport shooters this week and reiterated Premier Doug Ford’s rejection of any gun or ammunition bans.", "\n\n“Our Premier has been very clear in his message that our government will not seek a handgun ban or an ammunition ban within the province of Ontario,” Tibollo told the provincial parliament on Oct. 4. “", "There are many law-abiding firearm owners within this great province.”", "\n\nFord and Saskatchewan Premier Scott Moe have emerged as the strongest provincial opponents to the gun prohibitions being examined by the government of Prime Minister Justin Trudeau, even beyond those in Bill C-71. ", "Police leaders have also refused the idea of seizing firearms from licensed owners.", "\n\nRead: Moe Says No: Saskatchewan Premier Joins Opposition to Gun Bans\n\nToronto City Council voted in July to ask the federal government to ban all handguns and all semi-automatic rifles and shotguns from all federally licensed gun owners in Canada. ", "Mayor John Tory asked target shooters to go somewhere else.", "\n\nTibollo was responding to Toronto Liberal MPP Mitzie Hunter’s Bill 30 to allow cities to ban the supply of handgun ammunition. ", "Her proposed law, which was stopped at second reading, didn’t even exempt the military or police.", "\n\nIf passed into law and adopted by municipalities, it would have disarmed lawful men and women while doing nothing to stop criminals who get guns and ammo unlawfully.", "\n\n“The Bill was voted down but we will not stop fighting,” Hunter said on Twitter on Oct. 4.", "\n\nMy statement below regarding Bill 30, Fighting Back Against Handguns Act. ", "The Bill was voted down but we will not stop fighting. ", "Families deserve to feel safe in their communities. ", "We need to act now. #", "ONpoli #ScarbTO #EndGunViolence @ZeroGunViolence @MidayntaYouth pic.twitter.com/28hxuGFPhf — Mitzie Hunter (@MitzieHunter) October 4, 2018\n\nAll guns and ammunition are banned across Canada for anyone without a firearm Possession and Acquisition Licence authorized by the federal police. ", "Getting a permit requires passing RCMP-designed safety courses and exams, and passing background and reference checks.", "\n\nRead: How to Buy a Handgun in Canada: Regulatory and Procedural Steps\n\nAbout 2.2 million Canadian men and women have the permits, more than play hockey. ", "Almost one-third of them live in Ontario.", "\n\n“With regard to ammunition in the province, the chief firearms office — or CFO, as they are more commonly referred to — is responsible for enforcing the sale and purchase of ammunition in this province,” Tibollo said. “", "We’re confident in the CFO to enforce the law and to take appropriate steps when it comes to the sale of ammunition in the province.”", "\n\nDuring question period earlier in the day, Hunter asked if the government supported handgun bans.", "\n\n“It’s not guns that kill people; it’s the people who have guns illegally that kill people,” Tibollo said as part of his response.", "\n\nAction Steps\n\nShare a message of support on social media. ", "For Minister Tibollo: Twitter: @MichaelTibollo and Facebook. ", "Or retweet or “like” TheGunBlog.ca’s tweet.", "\n\nContact your MPP or MLA to show how important this issue is to you. ", "Just a sentence or two by e-mail. ", "Option: Link this article, cc/bcc [email protected] . “", "Dear ____, I’d like to thank you and your party for supporting hunters and sport shooters. ", "Please see the attached article. ", "Sign me up as a volunteer. ", "Here’s a donation. ", "Yours sincerely, …”\n\n. ", "Subscribe to TheGunBlog.ca to get the latest news and resources.", "\n\nRelated Information" ]

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[ "Gelatin microspheres: initial clinical experience for the transcatheter arterial embolization.", "\nThe purpose of this study is to evaluate the embolization effects of gelatin microspheres (GMSs) when used as an embolic material for transcatheter arterial embolization (TAE) for several organs. ", "We prepared GMSs that dissolves in 5 days in extravasuclar tissue. ", "GMSs were used in five cases in total, four cases with multiple liver tumors and one case with a pelvic bone tumor. ", "In all five cases, it was possible to treat the targeted tumors by TAE with GMSs. ", "In the contrast-enhanced CT performed 2-4 weeks later, the embolized tumors did not show an enhancement effect. ", "Passage of GMSs in the microcatheter was excellent. ", "GMSs showed sufficient potential to be used as an embolic material." ]

{ "pile_set_name": "PubMed Abstracts" }

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[ "That is a gorgeous Jaguar XK120 coup. ", "It sure is red. ", "Interesting that you wrote, \"Hope it isn't broke.\" ", "They had a reputation as being less than completely reliable, and being difficult and expensive to work on. ", "On the other hand the roadster model of this car was the fastest production car available anywhere. ", "And the enlarged 6 cylinder motor continued in production into the 1980s. ", "The car clocked over 132 mph in 1949. ", "It was like the Bugatti Veyron of 1949-51." ]

{ "pile_set_name": "Pile-CC" }

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[ "Echocardiographic evaluation of the single right ventricle in congenital heart disease: results of new techniques.", "\nRight ventricular (RV) function is increasingly recognized as having prognostic significance in various disease processes. ", "The current gold standard for noninvasive measurement of RV function is cardiac magnetic resonance imaging; however, because of practical considerations, echocardiography remains the most often used modality for evaluating the RV. ", "In the past, because of its complex morphology, echocardiographic assessment of the RV was usually qualitative in nature. ", "Current advances in echocardiographic techniques have been able to overcome some of the previous limitations and thus quantification of RV function is increasingly being performed. ", "In addition, recent echocardiographic guidelines for evaluating the RV have been published to aid in standardizing practice. ", "The evaluation of RV function almost certainly has no greater importance than in the congenital heart population, especially in those patients that have a single RV acting as the systemic ventricle. ", "As this complex population continues to increase in number, accurate and precise evaluation of RV function will be a major issue in determining clinical care." ]

{ "pile_set_name": "PubMed Abstracts" }

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[ "Xenotransplantation for liver therapy or: Can porcine hepatocytes generate physiological functions sufficient for a human patient in ALF?", "\nDetailed knowledge about physiology, biochemistry and function is required before artificial liver devices using porcine hepatocytes may be used successfully. ", "Improvement of cell culture conditions and tissue engineering may permit the generation of human hepatocytes as substitutes for grafts in a transplantation setting. ", "The physiological functions of xenografts have to be compatible with those of the recipient. ", "However, first observations indicate that most physiological interaction in widely divergent species combinations such as pig and man are considerably different. ", "This may be crucial for the selection of a suitable organ, tissue or cell for a clinical set-up. ", "These differences vary from organ to organ and cell to cell. ", "Only very conservative molecules, like for example insulin or calcitonin function properly in both species, while others such as complement, albumin and erythropoietin do not fulfill their task properly or not at all." ]

{ "pile_set_name": "PubMed Abstracts" }

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[ "Semuse\n\nFrom SEMUSE\n\nSemuse is an open and collaborative community based project to work on the Semantic Museum, and envision the future of applied cultural heritage management. ", "Members of SeMuSe are collectively referred to as the SeMuSe community. ", "And individual is referred to as a SeMuSe member. ", "Membership is constituted by being listed on the members page. ", "If you want to become a member of SeMuSe please send an email to marco.neumann@gmail.com or sign-up on this wiki and add your name. ", "In case you want to be removed from the members page just send an email or edit the page yourself. ", "You can join the online discussion here: http://tech.groups.yahoo.com/group/semuse/ or http://groups.google.com/group/semuse and the OWL specific sub community here: http://groups.google.com/group/semuse-owl" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "Pile-CC" }

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[ "Modified fluorescence in situ hybridization methods using pathology archives.", "\nBrain tumors, like many other common tumors, are frequently associated with chromosomal numerical abnormalities. ", "However, as the identification of abnormal characteristics by conventional cytogenetic or molecular methods has been hampered by technical difficulties, minimal information has been available about specific chromosomal or locus-specific gene alterations. ", "Recently, fluorescence in situ hybridization (FISH) has emerged as a powerful clinical and research tool for the assessment of genomic instability within interphase nuclei. ", "Here, we developed a modified FISH protocol including short-term microwave treatment to analyze specimens from the pathology archives that had been routinely processed and stored. ", "The FISH signals obtained using this modified method showed a significant improvement compared with those obtained using the standard FISH method. ", "This new technique thus enables the analysis of various paraffin-embedded tissue sections of intracranial tumors obtained under inappropriate fixation conditions. ", "We highlight the advantages of this modified FISH procedure on a tissue microarray of archival materials for current diagnostic and investigative neuropathology applications." ]

{ "pile_set_name": "PubMed Abstracts" }

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[ "The British Bulldogs\n\nThe British Bulldogs were a professional wrestling tag-team consisting of cousins Davey Boy Smith and the Dynamite Kid (Tom Billington). ", "They competed throughout the 1980s in Britain, North America and Japan and are consistently ranked among the top tag teams in history. ", "Both Smith and Billington incurred premature deaths.", "\n\nBackground\nTom Billington (Dynamite Kid) and David Smith (Davey Boy Smith) were first cousins from the Lancashire town of Wigan in the United Kingdom. ", "Tom and Davey Boy are both grandsons of Joe and Nellie Billington. ", "Tom's father, Billy Billington, was the brother of Davey Boy's mother, Joyce Billington Smith. ", "In the 1970s, the Dynamite Kid and Davey Boy Smith both began their careers in Britain. ", "The two were soon invited to join Stampede Wrestling in Canada by talent scout Bruce Hart. ", "The Dynamite Kid went to Canada first and made a revolutionary impact in Stampede with his effortlessly fluid technical wrestling style, and had a fiery feud with his future brother-in-law, Bret Hart. ", "Davey Boy Smith came to Stampede in the early 1980s. ", "During their time together in Stampede, Dynamite and Davey Boy began a heated feud as Dynamite provoked Smith by saying he was \"a test-tube baby\".", "\n\nHistory\n\nEarly years (1983–1984)\nThe Dynamite / Davey Boy feud would continue in New Japan Pro Wrestling, where they became involved in a three-way feud that also involved The Cobra over the NWA World Junior Heavyweight Championship. ", "After they settled the feud, the two started to team as the British Bulldogs both in NJPW and Stampede Wrestling. ", "In March 1984, the Bulldogs would win the Stampede International Tag Team Championship for the first time. ", "In 1984, the two left NJPW to go to its bitter rival All Japan Pro Wrestling, effectively severing all ties to New Japan to this day.", "\n\nWorld Wrestling Federation (1984–1988)\nIn 1984, Vince McMahon bought out Stampede Wrestling. ", "The buyout meant that the British Bulldogs joined the World Wrestling Federation along with Smith's brother-in-law Bret Hart and Jim Neidhart (The Hart Foundation). ", "Initially the Bulldogs still toured with AJPW, but soon after they became WWF-exclusive. ", "Although the two British stars primarily wrestled against each other in Stampede Wrestling, with Billington as a villain and Smith as a hero, WWF owner Vince McMahon decided to make them only as a tag team.", "\n\nThe British Bulldogs' first and probably most well known feud was with the Hart Foundation, whom they knew well from their Stampede days, and thus were able to produce a series of outstanding matches that helped elevate both teams in the WWF. ", "The Bulldogs next major feud was with the then-WWF World Tag Team Champions, \"The Dream Team\" of Greg Valentine and Brutus Beefcake. ", "The Bulldogs wrestled Valentine and Beefcake for close to a year, coming close to but never winning the tag titles. ", "The stage was set for a \"final\" tag title match at WrestleMania 2. ", "With \"Captain\" Lou Albano and Ozzy Osbourne in their corner, the duo won the WWF World Tag-Team titles.", "\n\nThe Bulldogs continued their feud with the Dream Team and also defended regularly against the former championship team of The Iron Sheik & Nikolai Volkoff. ", "In December 1986, Dynamite Kid suffered a serious back injury during a match in Hamilton, Ontario, forcing him out of the ring for a longer period of time (during this period Davey Boy Smith would defend the titles with various replacement partners). ", "On January 26, 1987, the British Bulldogs lost the titles to the Hart Foundation in a match that saw Dynamite Kid so debilitated that he was carried to the ring by Davey Boy Smith and saw little physical action after being \"knocked out\" by the megaphone of the Hart Foundation's manager Jimmy Hart before he even got into the ring. “", "Evil Referee” Danny Davis then allowed the Foundation to continually double team Davey Boy in order to get the win (all the while continuing to \"check\" on Dynamite, leaving the double teaming to take place). ", "The match would air on February 7 on WWF Superstars of Wrestling.", "\n\nAfter being given time off to recuperate, the Bulldogs returned to the ring to continue their feud with the Hart Foundation and Davis (who, in the storyline, cheated to help the Hart Foundation win the title). ", "The teams met at WrestleMania III, where the Bulldogs teamed with Tito Santana to take on the trio. ", "The Harts and Davis would win the match when Davis hit Smith with Jimmy Hart's megaphone behind the referee's back and covered him for the win.", "\n\nTowards the end of the Bulldogs' title reign, they had been given a live bulldog named Matilda, who would accompany them to the ring. ", "Matilda was central to the Bulldogs' feud with The Islanders (Haku and Tama) who along with their manager Bobby \"The Brain\" Heenan \"dognapped\" her. ", "After rescuing Matilda, the Bulldogs teamed with Koko B. Ware (and his parrot \"Frankie\") in a six-man tag team match against The Islanders and Bobby Heenan at Wrestlemania IV. ", "The match ended with a loss as Heenan covered Koko for the 3-count. ", "The Bulldogs then went on to a feud with The Rougeau Brothers (Jacques and Raymond) which included wrestling the first ever match at the inaugural SummerSlam PPV at Madison Square Garden which ended in a time limit (20 minute) draw.", "\n\nThe Bulldogs' last pay-per-view was the 1988 Survivor Series. ", "They wrestled in a twenty-man (10 team) tag team elimination match notable for Mr. Fuji turning against his Tag Team Champions Demolition (Ax and Smash) and joining their rival The Powers of Pain (The Barbarian and The Warlord) in a double switch with Demolition turning face and the Powers of Pain turning heel. ", "The Powers of Pain won the match by eliminating the heel team Los Conquistadores, thus giving their team (which included The Bulldogs who had earlier been eliminated when Smash pinned Dynamite) the victory.", "\n\nThe Bulldogs left the WWF after backstage pranks and altercations with The Rougeau Brothers after bullying Jacques and beat him really hard because he didn't want to go out to the bar. ", "which led to Jacques Rougeau knocking several of Dynamite's teeth out with a suckerpunch (Rougeau was actually carrying a bunch of quarters in his fist to make the punch harder). ", "Billington himself, however, has claimed that the Rougeau incident was not the final straw that drove him to leave the WWF. ", "Rather, he has stated, it was a dispute with WWF management over issuing of complimentary plane tickets, over which he resigned from the company on principle and, to his surprise in retrospect, Smith followed suit.", "\n\nStampede Wrestling and All Japan Pro Wrestling (1988–1990)\nAfter leaving the WWF, the Bulldogs returned to their old “home” in Stampede Wrestling and also resumed touring with All Japan Pro Wrestling, where they had moderate success as a tag team, but it was not as magical seeing these two wrestle there, as years of steroid abuse made them too large, physique-wise, and Dynamite Kid's back injury from years prior had made his previously exciting moveset more limited. ", "They had feuds with the Cuban Commandos and Karachi Vice in Stampede and won the Stampede International Tag-Team titles for the second time on December 12, 1988.", "\n\nAfter losing the titles to Karachi Vice on December 30, 1988, Dynamite Kid became involved in a brutal feud with Johnny Smith in February 1989, after Johnny interfered and attacked Dynamite, before cutting his hair. ", "In May 1989, the Bulldogs split up in Stampede, but remained a team in AJPW at Giant Baba's request. ", "Over in Stampede, the Bulldogs feuded with each other, with Dynamite forming The British Bruisers with Johnny Smith and Davey Boy Smith teaming with a young Chris Benoit.", "\n\nIn September 1990, Davey Boy Smith abruptly withdrew the Bulldogs from AJPW's annual World's Strongest Tag Determination League by returning to the WWF, and fabricating to the All-Japan office that Dynamite was in a serious car accident and couldn't compete. ", "Since Davey Boy Smith had trademarked the term \"The British Bulldog\" during the Bulldogs' previous run in the WWF, he decided to return to the WWF as The British Bulldog and would send people to the United Kingdom to warn the promoter every time a flyer was distributed promoting Dynamite Kid as a \"British Bulldog.\" ", "As a result of these actions, Dynamite passionately despised Smith for a long time. ", "Johnny Smith would end up taking Davey Boy Smith's spot in the World's Strongest Tag Determination League, and the duo (known as The British Bruisers) continued to compete in All-Japan Pro Wrestling. ", "The duo managed to capture the All Asia Tag Team Championship, but the partnership was short-lived; the years of steroid abuse, working a high-impact style and cocaine usage caught up with \"the Dynamite Kid\" Thomas Billington as he suddenly announced his retirement on December 6, 1991, although he made the occasional comeback and wrestled his last match on 10 October 1996.", "\n\nAfter the breakup of The British Bulldogs tag team, Davey Boy Smith wrestled for the World Wrestling Federation (WWF) from 1990–1992, 1994–1997 and 1999–2000, and for World Championship Wrestling (WCW) in 1993 and 1998.", "\n\nDavey Boy Smith died of a heart attack on 18 May 2002 at the age of 39. ", "The Dynamite Kid, who had been in a wheelchair since August 1997, died on 5 December 2018 on his 60th birthday,\n\nThe British Bulldogs were made into action figures, first in 1986 during the LJN WWF Wrestling Superstars line and in the mid 2000s Classic Superstars line by Jakks Pacific.", "They were available separate as well as packaged together. ", "The Classic Superstars double pack even included their bulldog mascot, Matilda. ", "Both versions are highly sought after by collectors and prices can be well over hundreds of dollars in mint condition especially for Billington, as figures of him were not produced as much as Smith, who gained fame in both WWF and WCW after the Bulldogs' split while Billington wrestled primarily overseas, most notably in Japan and whose career was cut short due to injuries. ", "Many collectors who have obtained the figures consider them among their most prized pieces.", "\n\nChampionships and accomplishments\nAll Japan Pro Wrestling\nWorld's Strongest Tag Determination League Fighting Spirit Award (1984, 1985)\nPro Wrestling Illustrated\n Ranked #5 in the top 100 tag teams of the \"PWI Years\" in 2003\nStampede Wrestling\n Stampede International Tag Team Championship (2 times)\nWorld Wrestling Federation\nWWF World Tag Team Championship (1 time)\nWrestling Observer Newsletter awards\nBest Wrestling Maneuver (1984) Power clean dropkick\n Tag Team of the Year (1985)\n\nSee also\n Animals in professional wrestling\n Owen Hart and the British Bulldog\n\nReferences\n\nFurther reading\n\nExternal links\n Best of British Bulldog at WWE.com\n\nCategory:All Japan Pro Wrestling teams and stables\nCategory:Independent promotions teams and stables\nCategory:WWE teams and stables\nCategory:WWF/WWE World Tag Team Champions" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "Wikipedia (en)" }

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[ "c ł u v Ł ¶ §\n\nø\n\nØ\n\nIPMU-14-0212\\\nICRR-report-689-2014-15\\\n\n$^{(a)}$ and [**Masahiro Ibe**]{}$^{(a, b)}$,\n\nIntroduction\n============\n\nCosmic inflation [@Guth:1980zm] (see also Ref.", " [@Kazanas:1980tx]) is a very successful paradigm of modern cosmology which not only solves various problems of the standard cosmology such as the horizon problem and the flatness problem, but also provides the origins of the large scale structure of the universe and the fluctuation of the cosmic microwave background (CMB) radiation [@Mukhanov:1981xt]. ", "Precise measurements of the CMB [@Hinshaw:2012aka; @Ade:2013uln] have shown that the so-called slow-roll inflation [@Linde:1981mu; @Albrecht:1982wi] is remarkably successful.", "\n\nAmong various models of cosmic inflation, so-called natural inflation[@Freese:1990rb] has been considered to be one of the most attractive models, in which a pseudo-Nambu-Goldstone (NG) boson (pseudo-NGB) associated with spontaneously breaking of an approximate symmetry plays a role of the inflaton. ", "The shape of the inflaton potential is well controlled by small explicit breaking of the spontaneously broken symmetry. ", "After the announcement of a large tensor fraction in the CMB, $r=O(0.1)$, by the BICEP2 collaboration [@Ade:2014xna], natural inflation has received renewed attention since it shows a perfect fit with the BICEP2 result[@Freese:2014nla].", "\n\nWorrisome features of natural inflation are, however, the requirements of a decay constant larger than the Planck scale and the trans-Planckian variation of the inflaton field during inflation. ", "Such trans-Planckian decay constant and field variation are not easy to be justified within the framework of the effective field theory valid below the Planck scale. ", "There the Lagrangian is at the best given by a series expansion of fields with higher dimensional operators suppressed by the Planck scale. ", "In this view point of the effective field theory, the trans-Planckian decay constant and the field variation seem inevitably sensitive to the theory beyond the Planck scale.", "\n\nIn order to avoid troubles of Planck suppressed operators, so far, many attempts have been made where the trans-Planckian decay constant and field variation are realized in effective ways while keeping actual field values within the Planck scale. ", "For example, alignment between potentials of natural inflation generated by multiple explicit breaking effects leads to the one with an effective decay constant larger than the Planck scale [@Kim:2004rp] (see also Ref.[@Choi:2014rja; @Higaki:2014pja] for recent discussions). ", "In $N$-flation [@Dimopoulos:2005ac], many pseudo-NGBs are introduced and their collective dynamics lead to an effectively large decay constant. ", "The monodromic behaviors of the pseudo-NGB also realize models with an effective decay constant larger than the Planck scale, which is originally proposed in models based on string theory [@Silverstein:2008sg; @McAllister:2008hb] and are generalized in field theoretic approaches[@Kaloper:2008fb; @Berg:2009tg; @Kaloper:2011jz; @Dine:2014hwa]. ", "It is also pointed out that natural inflation potential generated by an anomaly in a large $N_c$ gauge dynamics has an effective decay constant much larger than the scale of the spontaneous symmetry breaking[@Yonekura:2014oja].", "\n\nIn Ref.[@Harigaya:2014eta], the authors proposed another class of models which achieve trans-Planckian field variations in an effective way in a field theoretic approach. ", "There, the inflaton potential exhibits monodromic behavior due to the “phase locking\" mechanism between two pseudo-NGBs, which can be immediately applied to natural inflation. ", "In this paper, we refer to models in this class as “phase locked\" inflation, and give detail discussion on the models.", "\n\nWe also propose a supersymmetric model of natural inflation based on the “phase locking\" mechanism. ", "In particular, we show that it is possible to construct a model consistent with low-scale supersymmetry in our approach. ", "It should be emphasized that in the most models of supersymmetric natural inflation so far proposed, the explicit symmetry breaking term leading to the inflaton potential is proportional to the constant term in the superpotential, i.e. the gravitino mass. ", "Therefore, in order to reproduce the measured properties of the CMB, the gravitino mass turns out to be very large and are not compatible with low scale supersymmetry in a multi-TeV range. ", "In our model, on the other hand, the explicit symmetry breaking is separated from the $R$-symmetry breaking, and hence, the model does not require a large gravitino mass even for a high scale inflation.", "\n\nThe organization of this paper is as follows. ", "In the next section, we give detailed descriptions of generic features of natural inflation based on the “phase locking\" mechanism. ", "We also discuss details of the inflation dynamics such as the initial condition of the inflaton. ", "In section\\[sec:SUSY\\], we show a simple model of the supersymmetric natural inflation based on “phase locked\" inflation which is compatible with low scale supersymmetry breaking. ", "We also discuss the reheating process and some interesting features of the model. ", "The final section is devoted to discussion and conclusions.", "\n\nPhase Locked Inflation {#sec:locking}\n======================\n\nIn this section, we give a detailed description of the “phase locking\" mechanism proposed in Ref.[@Harigaya:2014eta], which can be applied to natural inflation so that the model has an effective decay constant larger than the Planck scale.", "\n\nBrief review on natural inflation\n---------------------------------\n\nBefore going to details of the mechanism, let us briefly review natural inflation [@Freese:1990rb]. ", "In natural inflation, the inflaton is identified with a pseudo-NGB associated with spontaneously breaking of an approximate symmetry. ", "When the explicit breaking of the symmetry is dominated by a single breaking term, the inflaton potential is given by, $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\label{eq:NI}\n V = \\Lambda^4 (1 - \\cos(a/f)) \\ ,\\end{aligned}$$ where $\\L$ denotes a parameter encoding the explicit breaking while $f$ is the decay constant of the pseudo-NGB $a$. From this potential, we immediately find that the slow-roll parameters, $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\epsilon &=& \\frac{\\mpl^2}{2}\\left(\\frac{V'}{V}\\right)^2 = \\frac{\\mpl^2}{2f^2}\\frac{\\sin^2(a/f)}{(1-\\cos(a/f))^2}\\ , \\cr\n\\eta &=& \\frac{\\mpl^2V''}{V} = \\frac{\\mpl^2}{f^2}\\frac{\\cos(a/f)}{(1-\\cos(a/f))}\\ ,\\end{aligned}$$ satisfy the slow-roll conditions, $\\epsilon \\ll 1$ and $|\\eta| \\ll 1$, only for $$\\begin{aligned}\nf \\gg \\mpl \\quad {\\rm and}\\quad |a| \\gg \\mpl \\ .\\end{aligned}$$ Thus, if we simply identify the decay constant $f$ with the scale of spontaneous symmetry breaking by a vacuum expectation value (VEV) , i.e. $$\\begin{aligned}\n X \\sim O(f) e^{i a/f}\\ ,\\end{aligned}$$ where $X$ denotes a field which is responsible for spontaneous symmetry breaking, the large decay constant requires a VEV much larger than the Planck scale. ", "As cautioned in introduction, such a VEV larger than the Planck scale is difficult to be justified in the effective field theory below the Planck scale. ", "We loose control over the inflaton potential from contributions of higher dimensional operators suppressed by the Planck scale.", "\n\nEffectively large decay constant by phase locking\n-------------------------------------------------\n\nThe decay constant $f$ is, however, not necessary to be of the order of the scale of spontaneous symmetry breaking. ", "In fact, a decay constant much larger than the VEVs can be realized in a very simple manner, the “phase locking\" mechanism proposed in Ref.[@Harigaya:2014eta].", "\n\nTo illustrate the mechanism, let us consider a model with an approximate $U(1)$ symmetry under which two complex scalar fields $\\phi$ and $S$ have charges of $N$ and $1$, respectively. ", "The scalar potential consistent with the $U(1)$ symmetry is given by $$\\begin{aligned}\nV = V(\\phi \\phi^*, S S^*, \\phi^* S^N) \\ .\\end{aligned}$$ Now, let us assume that both $\\phi$ and $S$ obtain VEVs in a similar size. ", "In such a case, we have two candidates of the NGB, i.e. the phases of $\\phi$ and $S$; $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\phi|_{\\rm NGB} = |{ \\left\\langle {\\phi} \\right\\rangle }|\\, e^{i \\arg\\phi}\\ , \\quad\nS|_{\\rm NGB} = |{ \\left\\langle {S} \\right\\rangle }|\\, e^{i \\arg S}\\ .\\end{aligned}$$ Then, due to terms depending on $\\phi^* S^N$, one of the NGB candidates obtains a large mass from[^1] $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\label{eq:lock}\n V \\propto \\phi^* S^N + h.c. ", "= 2 |{ \\left\\langle {\\phi} \\right\\rangle } | |{ \\left\\langle {S} \\right\\rangle }|^N \\cos( \\arg \\phi - N\\arg S)\\ .\\end{aligned}$$ As a result, the remaining NGB which will be identified with the inflaton corresponds to a combination, $$\\begin{aligned}\n a \\propto N\\arg\\phi + \\arg S \\ .\\end{aligned}$$ Putting all together, the canonically normalized NGB, $a$, is given by, $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\label{eq:NGB}\n\\phi|_{\\rm NGB} &=& |{ \\left\\langle {\\phi} \\right\\rangle }|\\, e^{i N a/f}\\ , \\nonumber\\\\\nS|_{\\rm NGB} &=& |{ \\left\\langle {S} \\right\\rangle }|\\, e^{i a/f}\\ \\ , \\nonumber\\\\\nf &\\equiv& \\sqrt{2 N^2 |{ \\left\\langle {\\phi} \\right\\rangle }|^2 + 2 |{ \\left\\langle {S} \\right\\rangle }|^2}\\ .\\end{aligned}$$ Remarkably, the decay constant $f$ can be much larger than the VEVs ${ \\left\\langle {\\phi} \\right\\rangle } \\simeq { \\left\\langle {S} \\right\\rangle }$ for $N\\gg 1$.\n\nTo generate the inflaton potential as in Eq.(\\[eq:NI\\]), we softly break the $U(1)$ symmetry by $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\label{eq:breaking}\nV = M^3 S + {\\rm h.c.}\\ .\\end{aligned}$$ Here, one may consider that the explicit breaking parameter $M^3$ is a spurious field whose $U(1)$ charge is $-1$. The inflaton potential is dominated by the contribution of this explicit breaking term. ", "Substituting Eqs.", " (\\[eq:NGB\\]) to (\\[eq:breaking\\]), we obtain the desirable inflaton potential,[^2] $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\label{eq:lockedNI}\nV(a) = 2 |M^3 { \\left\\langle {S} \\right\\rangle }| \\left( 1- {\\cos}(a/f)\\right)\\ .\\end{aligned}$$ Here, we have eliminated a constant phase and a sign inside the cosine by shifting $a$, and added a constant term to the potential so that the cosmological constant vanishes at the vacuum. ", "In this way, we obtain a model of natural inflation with a decay constant much larger than the scale of symmetry breaking.", "\n\nIt should be noted that the potential term Eq.(\\[eq:lock\\]) tightly interrelates the phases of $\\phi$ and $S$ so that $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\arg S = \\frac{1}{N}\\arg \\phi\\ , \\quad {\\rm i.e.}\\quad S \\propto \\phi^{1/N}\\ ,\\end{aligned}$$ in the effective theory below the breaking scale. ", "We refer to this phenomenon as “phase locking\". ", "In view of the phase locking mechanism, the effectively large decay constant can be understood in the following way. ", "Due to the phase locking, when $\\phi$ rotates $2\\pi$, $S$ rotates only $2\\pi/N$. Since the inflaton potential is provided by the explicit breaking term on the phase rotation symmetry of $S$ as in Eq.(\\[eq:breaking\\]), the periodicity of the potential in terms of the phase of $\\phi$ is effectively enlarged to $2\\pi N$. Besides, for a large $N$, the pseudo-NGB $a$ is mainly composed of the phase of $\\phi$ due to its large charge $N$ as long as ${ \\left\\langle {\\phi} \\right\\rangle } \\sim { \\left\\langle {S} \\right\\rangle }$. ", "Therefore, the inflaton dynamics is approximately identified with the dynamics of the phase of $\\phi$, which can take effectively larger field values than the VEVs of $\\phi$ and $S$. In Fig.", " \\[fig:lock\\], we show the inflaton trajectory on the ($\\arg S$, $\\arg\\phi$) plane for $N=5$.[^3]\n\n![*(", "Left) A scalar potential as a function of the phases of $S$ and $\\phi$ for $N=5$. The inflaton trajectory corresponds to the valley is shown by the solid line. ", "Arrowheads indicate the height of the inflaton potential along the trajectory, and the field values which maximize and minimize the potential in Eq.(\\[eq:lockedNI\\]) are denoted by points. (", "Right) The shallow inflaton potential in Eq.(\\[eq:lockedNI\\]) along the valley in the left panel as a function of $\\arg[\\phi]$.* []{data-label=\"fig:lock\"}](locked.pdf){width=\"1\\linewidth\"}\n\nThe explicit breaking of the $U(1)$ symmetry may also be provided by non-perturbative dynamics. ", "For example, let us assume a QCD-like theory which exhibits spontaneous breaking of chiral symmetries at a dynamical scale $\\Lambda_{\\rm dyn}$ far below the VEVs of $\\phi$ and $S$. We couples $S$ to the gauge theory via a yukawa coupling, $$\\begin{aligned}\n{\\cal L}_{\\rm int} = y S Q\\bar{Q},\\end{aligned}$$ where $Q$ and $\\bar{Q}$ are fermion fields charged under the gauge symmetry and $y$ is a constant. ", "Since the $U(1)$ symmetry is now anomalous, the scalar potential of the pseudo-NGB $a$ is generated.", "\n\nWe first consider the case where there are fermions which are charge under the gauge symmetry and are lighter than $\\Lambda_{\\rm dyn}$. In this case, as is the case with the QCD-axion [@Peccei:1977hh; @Weinberg:1977ma; @Wilczek:1977pj], the potential of $a$ is given by $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\label{eq:pot fermion}\nV &\\simeq& m_f\\Lambda_{\\rm dyn}^3 \\left(1- \\cos\\left(\\arg S\\right)\\right)\\ , \\nonumber\\\\\n&\\simeq& m_f\\Lambda_{\\rm dyn}^3\\left(1- \\cos( a/f)\\right)\\ .\\end{aligned}$$ where $m_f$ is the mass of the light fermions. ", "Here, we have assumed that the light fermions have masses of the same order, for simplicity.", "\n\nNext, let us consider the case where there is no light fermion which is charged under the gauge symmetry. ", "In this case, it is difficult to calculate the scalar potential of $a$; the simple cosine form such as the one in Eq.", " (\\[eq:pot fermion\\]) is not guaranteed. ", "For large $N_c$ dynamics, however, the potential is expanded as [@Yonekura:2014oja; @Witten:1980sp] $$\\begin{aligned}\nV (a) = \\Lambda_{\\rm dyn}^4\\frac{a^2}{f^2} \\left( 1 + {\\cal O} \\left(\\frac{a^2}{f^2 N_c^2}\\right) \\right).\\end{aligned}$$ For $a<f N_c$, the potential is approximated by a quadratic one. ", "We can say that the effective decay constant is further enhanced by $N_c$, $$\\begin{aligned}\nf_{\\rm eff} \\simeq N_c f \\simeq N_c N |{ \\left\\langle {\\phi} \\right\\rangle }|.\\end{aligned}$$ This enhancement is also helpful to have a successful natural inflation model from small field values [@Yonekura:2014oja].", "\n\nBefore closing this section, let us discuss an issue for a very large $N$. In this case, the phase locking potential in Eq.(\\[eq:lock\\]) is highly suppressed due to their high mass dimensions, and hence, the other inflaton candidate, $b\\propto \\arg \\phi - N \\arg S$, becomes lighter than $a$ for a given $M^3$ unless the VEVs of $S$ and $\\phi$ are very close to $M_{\\rm PL}$. Unfortunately, however, $b$ cannot be a good candidate of the inflaton since the effective decay constant of $b$ is given by $f/N$, and hence, we cannot achieve an effectively large decay constant for $b$.\n\nThis problem can be evaded if we generalize the idea to a generic approximately $U(1)$ symmetric model and introduce complex scalar fields $\\phi_{i}$ with $U(1)$ charges of ${q_i}$ $(i = 1,2,\\cdots,~|q_i|\\leq |q_{i+1}|,~q_1 = 1)$. We further assume that the $U(1)$ symmetry is spontaneously broken by the VEVs of all the complex scalar fields in similar sizes. ", "With this generalization, the potential terms which corresponds to the phase locking potential in Eq.(\\[eq:lock\\]) are not necessarily suppressed since we have fields with variety of charges. ", "Therefore, in this case, we expect that the pseudo-NGB $a$ associated with the spontaneous symmetry breaking resides in the complex scalar fields; $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\label{eq:NGBgen}\n\\phi_{i} &\\rightarrow& |{ \\left\\langle {\\phi_{i}} \\right\\rangle }| {\\rm exp}\\left[i q_i \\frac{a}{f}\\right],\\nonumber\\\\\nf &\\equiv& \\sqrt{2 \\sum_i q_i^2 |{ \\left\\langle {\\phi_i} \\right\\rangle }|^2}\\ ,\\end{aligned}$$ while other phase directions are strongly fixed by the phase locking potentials. ", "The larger charge the field has, the more pseudo-NGB component the field has. ", "Then, by explicitly breaking the $U(1)$ symmetry by a linear term of the field with the smallest charge, the inflaton potential is that of natural inflation with the decay constant $f$, which can be much larger than a VEV of each field.", "\n\nInflaton Dynamics and Initial Condition\n---------------------------------------\n\nFinally, let us discuss how inflation begins in our set up. ", "Since we assume that the VEVs of $\\phi$ and $S$ are below the Planck scale, it is natural to expect that the universe is in a symmetric phase at a very early epoch at around the Planck time. ", "Then, it is generically expected that cosmic strings are formed when the universe experiences the $U(1)$ phase transition.[^4] Then, as the energy of the universe further drops, the explicit breaking of the $U(1)$ symmetry becomes important, and domain walls are formed in between cosmic strings. ", "As a result, the universe is dominated by networks of strings and domain walls.[^5] This situation is quite similar to the evolution of the string-domain wall network in the case of the QCD-axion [@Sikivie:1982qv] which is confirmed by numerical simulations[@Ryden:1989vj].", "\n\nIn the string-domain wall network, we can find domain walls surrounded by cosmic strings around which the phases of $\\phi$ and $S$ on the inflaton trajectory shown in Fig.", " \\[fig:lock\\] wrap. ", "The energy density of this type of the domain walls is as large as $\\Lambda^4$.[^6] A typical thickness of domain walls is as large as $m_a^{-1}$, where $m_a$ is the mass of the inflaton [@Linde:1994hy; @Vilenkin:1994pv]. ", "On the other hand, the Hubble radius of a domain wall-dominated universe is as large as $\\mpl/ (m_a f)$. For $f> \\mpl$, domains walls are thicker than the Hubble radius of the domain wall dominated universe. ", "Thus, a region inside a domain wall can be regarded as an independent universe due to causality. ", "Well inside domain walls, the field value of the inflaton is close to the “Maximum\" in Fig.\\[fig:lock\\], where the slow-roll conditions are satisfied. ", "That is, natural inflation begins in a region well inside the domain wall. ", "This situation is the same as topological inflation [@Linde:1994hy; @Vilenkin:1994pv].", "\n\nSupersymmetric Natural Inflation {#sec:SUSY}\n================================\n\nIn this section, we propose a simple model of supersymmetric natural inflation compatible with low scale supersymmetry breaking, where the effectively trans-Planckian decay constant is realized by the phase locking mechanism.", "\n\nPhase locking and NG multiplet\n------------------------------\n\nAccording to the recipe to construct models with the phase locking mechanism, we assume that the model possesses an approximate $U(1)$ symmetry where the explicit breaking leads to the inflaton potential. ", "Concretely, we introduce four chiral multiplets $\\phi$, $\\bar{\\phi}$, $S$ and $\\bar{S}$ with $U(1)$ charges of $+N$, $-N$, $+1$ and $-1$, respectively. ", "We also assume that the model possesses the $R$-symmetry under which the above chiral multiplets are neutral.", "\n\nIn order for them to obtain non-zero VEVs and to have their phases locked with each other, we further introduce three chiral multiplets, $Y_1$, $Y_2$ and $Y_3$ with the $R$ charges of $2$ but with vanishing $U(1)$ charges. ", "With these charge assignments, the generic superpotential is given by $$\\begin{aligned}\nW = \\sum_{i=1,2,3} Y_i F_i (\\phi \\bar{\\phi},S\\bar{S}, S^N\\bar{\\phi},\\bar{S}^N \\phi),\\end{aligned}$$ where $F_i$ are generic holomorphic functions. ", "With this superpotential, all directions except for the pseudo-NG multiplet are fixed, and the phases are locked.", "\n\n $\\phi$ $\\bar{\\phi}$ $S$ ${\\bar{S}}$ $Y_{1,2}$ $Y_3$ $X$ $\\epsilon$ $\\bar{\\epsilon}$\n ---------- ---------------------------------- ---------------------------------- ---------------------------- --------------------------- ----------- ------- ----- ------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------\n $U(1)$ $+N$ $-N$ $+1$ $-1$ $0$ $0$ $0$ $+1$ $-1$\n $U(1)_R$ $0$ $0$ $0$ $0$ $2$ $2$ $2$ $0$ $0$\n $Z_2$ $(-)^{N+1}$ $(-)^{N+1}$ $-$ $-$ $+$ $-$ $-$ $+$ $+$\n $Z_{2C}$ $\\phi\\leftrightarrow \\bar{\\phi}$ $\\bar\\phi\\leftrightarrow {\\phi}$ $S\\leftrightarrow \\bar{S}$ $\\bar S\\leftrightarrow S$ $\\epsilon \\leftrightarrow \\bar{\\epsilon}$ $\\bar\\epsilon \\leftrightarrow {\\epsilon}$\n\n : *Charge assignment of the inflaton sector.*[]{data-label=\"tab:charge1\"}\n\nFor simplicity, we further introduce discrete symmetries $Z_2\\times Z_{2C}$ symmetry whose charge assignments are given in Table\\[tab:charge1\\]. ", "The generic leading order superpotential is given by $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\label{eq:superpotential}\nW = Y_1 ( \\lambda_{1\\phi}\\phi \\bar{\\phi} - v_1^2 ) + Y_2 ( \\lambda_{2\\phi} \\phi \\bar{\\phi} + \\lambda_{2S} S \\bar{S}- v_2^2 ) + \\lambda_3 Y_3(S^N \\bar{\\phi} + \\bar{S}^N \\phi)/\\mpl^{N-1},\\end{aligned}$$ where $\\lambda_{1\\phi}$, $\\lambda_{2\\phi}$, $\\lambda_{2S}$ and $\\lambda_{3}$ denote dimensionless coupling constants while $v_{1,2}$ are dimensional constants in a similar size with each other. ", "We have eliminated the coupling of $Y_1$ with $S \\bar{S}$ by taking appropriate linear combinations of $Y_1$ and $Y_2$. We take $\\lambda_{1\\phi}$, $v_1^2$, $\\lambda_{2S}$ and $v_2^2$ to be real and positive without loss of generality. ", "As we will discuss later, we find the $Z_2 \\times Z_{2C}$ symmetry is helpful to suppress the decay of the inflaton into gravitinos, though not mandatory. ", "It should be emphasized that the other higher dimensional operators suppressed by $\\mpl$ are not very relevant for the following discussion since we assume that the VEVs of $\\phi$’s and $S$’s are below the Planck scale.", "\n\nNow, let us extract a multiplet of the pseudo-NGB associated with the $U(1)$ symmetry breaking. ", "First, with the $F$ term conditions of $Y_1$ and $Y_2$, the chiral multiplets $\\phi$, $\\bar{\\phi}$, $S$ and $\\bar{S}$ are reduced to $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\phi \\rightarrow v_\\phi e^{\\rho}\\ ,\\quad\\bar{\\phi} \\rightarrow v_{\\phi} e^{-\\rho}\\ ,\\nonumber\\\\\nS \\rightarrow v_S e^{\\sigma}\\ , \\quad \\bar{S} \\rightarrow v_S e^{-\\sigma}\\ ,\\end{aligned}$$ where $v_{\\phi} = v_1 / \\sqrt{\\lambda_{1\\phi}}$ and $v_S = v_2/\\sqrt{\\lambda_{2S}}$, and $\\rho$ and $\\sigma$ are the chiral multiplets. ", "Then, the $F$ term condition of $Y_3$ further requires $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\label{eq:lockingSUSY}\ne^{N\\sigma -\\rho } + e^{-N\\sigma + \\rho} =0 \\ \\Longleftrightarrow \\ \\sigma = \\frac{\\rho}{N} + i \\pi \\frac{2n +1}{2N}\\ ,(n=0,1,\\cdots,2N-1)\\ ,\\end{aligned}$$ which is nothing but the phase locking. ", "In the following, we fix the phase locking direction to $\\sigma = \\rho/N + i \\pi / (2N)$ by rotating $S$ and $\\bar{S}$ by $e^{- i\\pi n/N}$ and $e^{+ i\\pi n/N}$.[^7]\n\nAccording to the discussion in the previous section, we identify $\\rho$ as the main component of the pseudo-NG multiplet for a large $N$ as long as $v_{\\phi} \\sim v_{S}$. The $F$-term condition of $Y_3$ generates the non-trivial potential mainly to $\\sigma$.[^8] With this identification, we refer to $\\rho$ as the inflaton multiplet whose imaginary part of the scalar component plays a role of the inflaton in natural inflation. ", "We also refer to the real part of the inflaton multiplet as the s-inflaton.", "\n\nInflation dynamics\n------------------\n\nIn order to give a potential to the inflaton via explicit $U(1)$ breaking, we introduce a chiral multiplet $X$ and spurious fields $\\epsilon$ and $\\bar{\\epsilon}$ whose charge assignments are given in Table \\[tab:charge1\\]. ", "We assume that the $Z_{2C}$ symmetry is not explicitly broken by these fields, and hence, we fix $ \\epsilon = \\bar{\\epsilon}$. By using these multiplet, we introduce explicit $U(1)$ breaking terms, $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\label{eq:breakingSUSY}\n\\Delta W &=& X (\\bar{\\epsilon} S + \\epsilon \\bar{S} ) = \\epsilon X (S + \\bar{S}) \\ .", "\n$$ By substituting the NG modes appeared in Eqs.(\\[eq:lockingSUSY\\]) and (\\[eq:breakingSUSY\\]), we obtain the superpotential of the pseudo-NG multiplet, $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\label{eq:supereff}\n\\Delta W \n&=& \\epsilon v_S X \\left(\n{\\rm exp}\\left[ \\frac{\\rho}{N} + i \\frac{\\pi}{2N} \\right] + {\\rm exp}\\left[-\\frac{\\rho}{N} - i \\frac{\\pi}{2N} \\right] \n \\right),\\end{aligned}$$ which has a similar structure with the superpotential used in the supergravity chaotic inflation [@Kawasaki:2000yn].[^9] From this superpotential, we again find that the defining region of the imaginary part of $\\rho$, i.e. the inflaton, is effectively enhanced from $[0,2\\pi]$ to $[0, 2\\pi N]$ due to the phase locking in Eq.(\\[eq:lockingSUSY\\]). ", "Then, by remembering that the kinetic term of $\\rho$ is mainly originated not from $S$’s but from $\\phi$’s, and hence, the canonically normalized inflaton multiplet $A$ is given by $A \\sim \\rho/v_\\phi $, the effective decay constant appearing in Eq.(\\[eq:supereff\\]) is $f \\sim N\\,v_\\phi$. In this way, we can successfully supersymmetrize the phase locking mechanism which provides an effective decay constant larger than the VEVs in the linearly realized $U(1)$ symmetric models, i.e., $f = O(N \\times v_{\\phi, S})$.\n\nNow, let us discuss behaviors of the scalar fields during inflation. ", "As in the generic model of the chaotic inflation in supergravity [@Kawasaki:2000yn], $X$ obtains a non-zero $F$-term, $F_X$, during inflation, which provides the inflaton potential. ", "The scalar components of $X$ as well as the s-inflaton are, on the other hand, stabilized at their origins due to couplings to $X X^\\dag$ in the Kahler potential, assuming that those couplings provide them with positive squared masses of the order of the Hubble scale squared during inflation. ", "After inflation, $F_X$ vanishes as the inflaton oscillation decays. ", "In this way, our model realizes the natural inflation model in the same way as the non-SUSY models. ", "It should be emphasized that we have not required any $R$-symmetry breaking to realize the explicite $U(1)$ breaking effective potential in Eq.(\\[eq:supereff\\]). ", "Thus, the energy density of the universe during inflation which is proportional to the size of the explicite $U(1)$ braking is not related to $R$-symmetry breaking, i.e. the size of the gravitino mass. ", "Therefore, in our model, the gravitino can be small even for high scale inflation, and hence, it is compatible with low scale supersymmetry breaking.", "\n\nFinally, let us show the inflaton potential explicitly. ", "Since we assume that the VEVs of $\\phi$’s and $S$’s are below the Planck scale, the relevant Kahler potential terms of $\\rho$ originate from, $$\\begin{aligned}\nK &=& \\phi \\phi^\\dag + \\bar{\\phi} \\bar{\\phi}^\\dag + S S^\\dag + \\bar{S} \\bar{S}^\\dag \\nonumber \\\\\n&=& v_\\phi^2 (e^{\\rho + \\rho^\\dag} +e^{-(\\rho + \\rho^\\dag)}) + v_S^2 ( e^{(\\rho + \\rho^\\dag)/N} + e^{-(\\rho + \\rho^\\dag)/N}) \\nonumber \\\\\n&\\simeq & v_\\phi^2 (e^{\\rho + \\rho^\\dag} +e^{-(\\rho + \\rho^\\dag)})\\nonumber \\\\\n&=& v_\\phi^2 + v_\\phi^2 (\\rho + \\rho^\\dag)^2 + \\cdots\\end{aligned}$$ where we have assumed $v_\\phi \\sim v_S$ and $N\\gg 1$. Around the origin of the s-inflaton, the canonically normalized pseudo-NG multiplet $A$ is given by $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\label{eq:canonical}\nA = \\sqrt{2} v_\\phi \\rho \\ ,\\end{aligned}$$ as expected. ", "Then, from Eqs.", " (\\[eq:supereff\\]) and (\\[eq:canonical\\]), the potential of the inflaton is given by $$\\begin{aligned}\nV(a) = 2 \\epsilon^2 v_S^2 \\left(\n1 - \\cos\\left( \\frac{2a}{N v_\\phi} + \\frac{\\pi}{N} \\right)\n\\right)\\ ,\\end{aligned}$$ where $a = \\sqrt{2}{\\rm Im}A$. The effective decay constant is $$\\begin{aligned}\nf = N v_\\phi/2,\\end{aligned}$$ which is far larger than the VEV of $\\phi$ if $N\\gg1$. In Fig.", " \\[fig:mass\\], we show the energy scale $\\sqrt{\\epsilon v_S}$ and the mass of the inflaton $m = \\sqrt{2} \\epsilon v_S / f $ for a given $f$ [@Freese:1990rb]. ", "Here, we have used the observed magnitude of the curvature perturbation, ${\\cal P}_\\zeta \\simeq 2.2\\times 10^{-9}$ [@Ade:2013uln], and assumed that the number of e-foldings at the pivot scale of $0.002~{\\rm Mpc}^{-1}$ is $55$.\n\n![*(", "Left) The energy scale $\\sqrt{\\epsilon v_S}$ for a given decay constant $f$. (Right)The mass of the inflaton, $m$, for a given decay constant $f$.* []{data-label=\"fig:mass\"}](epsilon.pdf){width=\"\\linewidth\"}\n\n![*(", "Left) The energy scale $\\sqrt{\\epsilon v_S}$ for a given decay constant $f$. (Right)The mass of the inflaton, $m$, for a given decay constant $f$.* []{data-label=\"fig:mass\"}](mass.pdf){width=\"1.0\\linewidth\"}\n\nReheating Processes\n-------------------\n\nIn this subsection, let us discuss the reheating process in our set up. ", "For a while, we assume that the $Z_2\\times Z_{2C}$ symmetry introduced in the previous section is also respected in the interactions for the reheating process. ", "Here, it should be noted that the inflaton possesses a $Z_2$ odd parity around the vacuum, i.e. at $F_X = 0$; $$\\begin{aligned}\n{ \\left\\langle {\\rho} \\right\\rangle } = i \\pi \\left(\\frac{N (2k+1) -1}{2}\\right),~~{ \\left\\langle {\\sigma} \\right\\rangle } = i \\pi \\left(k + \\frac{1}{2}\\right)~~(k = 0,1)\\ .\\end{aligned}$$ That is, after $\\phi$ and $S$ obtain non-vanishing VEVs, $Z_2\\times Z_{2C}$ is broken down to a $Z_2$ symmetry. ", "This remaining $Z_2$ symmetry forbids the decay of the inflaton into gravitinos [@Endo:2006zj; @Nakamura:2006uc; @Kawasaki:2006gs], and hence, the model with this symmetry is free from the gravitino problem induced by the inflaton decay.", "\n\nDespite this advantage of the $Z_2$ symmetry, the symmetry at the same time forbids the decay of the inflaton into the radiation composed of the Standard Model particles unless they are also charged under the $Z_2$ symmetry.[^10] Fortunately, however, it is not difficult to make the Standard Model fields have non-trivial charges under the symmetry. ", "For example, we may consider the charge assignment given in Table \\[tab:charge2\\],[^11] in which we have promoted the $Z_2\\times Z_{2C}$ symmetry to a $Z_4\\times Z_{4C}$ symmetry which has some advantageous features as we will see shortly.[^12] In the table, we have introduced right-handed neutrinos $N_R$ to explain the small mass of the neutrino by the seesaw mechanism [@seesaw].", "\n\n $\\phi$ $\\bar{\\phi}$ $S$ $\\bar{S}$ $Y_{1,2}$ $Y_3$ $X$ $\\epsilon$ $\\bar{\\epsilon}$\n ---------- ---------------------------------- -------------- ---------------------------- ----------- ----------- ------- ----- ------------------------------------------- ------------------\n $U(1)$ $+N$ $-N$ $+1$ $-1$ $0$ $0$ $0$ $+1$ $-1$\n $U(1)_R$ $0$ $0$ $0$ $0$ $2$ $2$ $2$ $0$ $0$\n $Z_4$ $(-)^{N+1}$ $(-)^{N+1}$ $-$ $-$ $+$ $-$ $-$ $+$ $+$\n $Z_{4C}$ $\\phi\\leftrightarrow \\bar{\\phi}$ $S\\leftrightarrow \\bar{S}$ $\\epsilon \\leftrightarrow \\bar{\\epsilon}$ \n $\\bar{u},Q,\\bar{e}$ $\\bar{d},L$ $H_u$ $H_d$ $N_R$ \n $U(1)$ $0 $ $0$ $0$ $0$ $0$ \n $U(1)_R$ $1$ $1$ $0$ $0$ $1$ \n $Z_4$ $i$ $i$ $-$ $-$ $i$ \n $Z_{4C}$ $i$ $i$ $-$ $-$ $ i $ \n\n : *Charge assignment of the inflaton sector and of the minimal supersymmetric standard model sector $(\\bar{u}, Q, \\bar{e}, \\bar{d}, L, H_u, H_d)$, and of the right-handed neutrinos $N_R$.*[]{data-label=\"tab:charge2\"}\n\nWith the above charge assignment, the dominant decay mode is provided by the Kahler potential term, $$\\begin{aligned}\n K = \\frac{y_1}{2 \\mpl} X^\\dag N_R N_R + {\\rm h.c.},\\end{aligned}$$ which leads to the decay rate; $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\Gamma = \\frac{y_1^2}{8\\pi} \\frac{m^3}{\\mpl^2},\\end{aligned}$$ where $y_1$ is a constant. ", "The rehearing temperature is $$\\begin{aligned}\nT_{\\rm RH} &\\equiv& \\sqrt{\\frac{90}{\\pi^2g_*}}\\sqrt{\\Gamma\\mpl} \\nonumber\\\\\n&=& 1.6 \\times 10^9~{\\rm GeV} \\times y_1 \\left(\\frac{m}{1.5\\times 10^{13}~{\\rm GeV}}\\right)^{3/2} \\left(\\frac{g_*}{200}\\right)^{-1/2}\\ ,\\end{aligned}$$ where $g_*$ is the effective degree of freedom of radiation. ", "For $y_1 = O(1)$, the reheating temperature is high enough for successful thermal leptogenesis [@Fukugita:1986hr; @Buchmuller:2005eh]. ", "Since the inflaton directly decays into the right-handed neutrino, non-thermal leptogenesis [@Kumekawa:1994gx] is also possible.", "\n\nAs an interesting feature of the promoted discrete symmetry, $Z_4\\times Z_{4C}$, the masses of the right-handed neutrinos are interrelated to the explicit $U(1)$ breaking parameter $\\e$. That is, due to $Z_4\\times Z_{4C}$, the masses of the right-handed neutrinos are generated from the following coupling to the inflaton sector, $$\\begin{aligned}\nW &=& \\frac{y_2}{2\\mpl} (\\bar{\\epsilon} S - \\epsilon \\bar{S} ) N_R N_R\\ ,\n$$ where $y_2$ is a constant. ", "As a result, the right-handed neutrino masses are given by, $$\\begin{aligned}\nM_R = 2 y_2 \\frac{\\epsilon v_S}{\\mpl} = 1.4\\times10^{14}~{\\rm GeV}\\times y_2 \\frac{\\epsilon v_S}{1.7\\times 10^{32}~{\\rm GeV}^2},\\end{aligned}$$ which are appropriate for the seesaw mechanism [@seesaw].", "\n\nLet us also comment on the reheating process when the model does not respect the $Z_{2}\\times Z_{2C}$ symmetry. ", "In this case, the inflaton decays into other particles through the supergravity effect without introducing any particular couplings between the inflaton and the Standard Model fields [@Endo:2006qk; @Endo:2007ih]. ", "On top of those spontaneous decays, the inflaton may decay, for example, via the superpotential term, $$\\begin{aligned}\nW = y_3X H_u H_d\\end{aligned}$$ where $y_3$ is a constant, which tends to result in a very high reheating temperature.[^13] It should be noted that without the $Z_{2}\\times Z_{2C}$ symmetry, the inflaton in general decays into gravitinos, which leads to overproduction of the lightest supersymmetric particle and/or spoils the success of the Big-Bang Nucleosynthesis. ", "To evade this inflaton induced gravitino problem, we need to assume either the discrete symmetries as we did in this paper or to assume the fields in the SUSY breaking sector much heavier than the inflaton [@Nakayama:2012hy].", "\n\nDiscussion and Conclusions\n==========================\n\nIn this paper, we gave detailed descriptions of “phase locked\" inflation where the effectively trans-Planckian decay constant for natural inflation is achieved by the “phase locking\" mechanism[@Harigaya:2014eta]. ", "As we have discussed, the effectively trans-Planckian decay constant originates from the charge assignments of fields which break the $U(1)$ symmetry. ", "This mechanism should be contrasted with other attempts to realize the effectively trans-Planckian decay constant field variation by, for example, alignment between several potentials of natural inflation or by using the collective behaviour of multi-inflatons of natural inflation. ", "In our model, on the other hand, the effectively trans-Planckian decay constant can be achieved by only two fields without having alignments.", "\n\nWe also construct a model of supersymmetric natural inflation based on the “phase locking\" mechanism. ", "The advantageous feature of our model is that the explicit symmetry breaking of the $U(1)$ symmetry is separated from the $R$-symmetry breaking, and hence, the model does not lead to a large gravitino mass even for a high inflation energy scale. ", "Therefore, our model is compatible with low scale supersymmetry.", "\n\nWe have also discussed how the reheating process proceeds in this model. ", "In particular, we found that the decay of the inflaton can be well controlled by discrete symmetries which forbids the decay modes into gravitnos. ", "We also found that the masses of the right-handed neutrinos appropriate for the seesaw mechanism can be related to the inflation scale in a certain class of models with discrete symmetries.", "\n\nAcknowledgements {#acknowledgements .unnumbered}\n================\n\nWe thank Kawasaki Masahiro and Tsutomu T. Yanagida for useful discussion. ", "This work is supported by Grant-in-Aid for Scientific research from the Ministry of Education, Science, Sports, and Culture (MEXT), Japan, No. ", "24740151 and 25105011 (M.I.), from the Japan Society for the Promotion of Science (JSPS), No. ", "26287039 (M.I.), the World Premier International Research Center Initiative (WPI Initiative), MEXT, Japan (K.H. and M.I.) and a JSPS Research Fellowships for Young Scientists (K.H.).", "\n\nTunneling between valleys\n=========================\n\n![*(", "Left) Same as Fig.", " \\[fig:lock\\], with a possible tunneling process indicated by the red arrow. (", "Right) The potential along the tunnelling trajectory. ", "Here, $b$ denotes the canonically normalized field along the trajectory.* []{", "data-label=\"fig:tunneling\"}](tunneling.pdf){width=\"\\linewidth\"}\n\n![*(", "Left) Same as Fig.", " \\[fig:lock\\], with a possible tunneling process indicated by the red arrow. (", "Right) The potential along the tunnelling trajectory. ", "Here, $b$ denotes the canonically normalized field along the trajectory.* []{", "data-label=\"fig:tunneling\"}](crosssection.pdf){width=\"1.0\\linewidth\"}\n\nIn this section, we estimate the tunneling rate between the valleys of the inflaton potential, whose trajectory is shown in Fig.", " \\[fig:tunneling\\] by the red arrow. ", "For a large $N$, distance between valleys is short, and hence the tunneling process might disturb the inflation dynamics. ", "To be concrete, we consider the two field model presented in section \\[sec:locking\\]. ", "The potential along the tunneling trajectory is sketched in the right panel of Fig.", " \\[fig:tunneling\\], with the parameters $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\Delta b &=& \\frac{2\\pi}{N^2} f \\sim \\frac{2\\pi}{N} |{ \\left\\langle {\\phi} \\right\\rangle }|, \\nonumber \\\\\n\\epsilon &\\sim& \\frac{2\\pi}{N}\\Lambda^4, ~~ \\Lambda^4 \\sim 10^{-8}M_{\\rm pl}^4 \\nonumber\\\\\nU &\\sim& \\frac{1}{M_{\\rm Pl}^{N-3}} |{ \\left\\langle {\\phi} \\right\\rangle }| |{ \\left\\langle {S} \\right\\rangle }|^N, \\nonumber \\\\\n\\mu^2 &\\sim& \\frac{1}{M_{\\rm Pl}^{N-3}} |{ \\left\\langle {\\phi} \\right\\rangle }| |{ \\left\\langle {S} \\right\\rangle }|^N \\frac{N^2}{|{ \\left\\langle {\\phi} \\right\\rangle }|^2}.\\end{aligned}$$ Here, $b\\sim {\\rm arg}S /N \\times f $ denotes the canonically normalized field along the trajectory.", "\n\nNote that $U > \\epsilon$ is required so that $b$ does not move classically, which gives lower bound on ${ \\left\\langle {\\phi} \\right\\rangle }$ and ${ \\left\\langle {S} \\right\\rangle }$. ", "Under this assumption, the size of the core of the bounce solution of the tunneling process in the thin wall approximation [@Coleman:1977py], $U^{1/2} \\Delta b / \\epsilon$, is larger than the thickness of the skin of the bounce solution, $\\mu^{-1}$. Thus the thin wall approximation is applicable. ", "The tunneling rate per unit volume per unit time is given by [@Coleman:1977py] $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\Gamma &\\sim& \\mu^4 {\\rm exp} (- S_0),\\nonumber \\\\\nS_0 &\\sim& \\frac{27}{2 \\epsilon^3} \\pi^2 U^2 \\Delta b^4 = \\frac{27\\pi^6}{N} \\frac{|{ \\left\\langle {\\phi} \\right\\rangle }|^6 |{ \\left\\langle {S} \\right\\rangle }|^{2N}}{\\Lambda^{12}M_{\\rm Pl}^{2N-6}}.\\end{aligned}$$ Since $\\Lambda \\sim 10^{-2} M_{\\rm Pl} \\ll M_{\\rm Pl} $, $S_0$ is far larger than one for sufficiently large but sub-Planckian ${ \\left\\langle {\\phi} \\right\\rangle }$ and ${ \\left\\langle {S} \\right\\rangle }$. 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", "S. R. Coleman, Phys.", " Rev. D [**15**]{}, 2929 (1977) \\[Erratum-ibid.", " D [**16**]{}, 1248 (1977)\\].", "\n\n[^1]: Here, we suppressed phases of the potential terms for simplicity.", "\n\n[^2]: For a very large $N$, the scalar potentials which lock the phases of $\\phi$ and $S$, i.e. the $\\phi^* S^N$-dependent terms, are highly suppressed due to their high mass dimensions. ", "In this case the potential in Eq.(\\[eq:lock\\]) is highly suppressed and hence the mode proportional to $\\arg \\phi - N \\arg S$ becomes lighter than $a$ which ruins our discussion[@Harigaya:2014eta]. ", "A possible solution to this problem is discussed at the end of this section.", "\n\n[^3]: For large $N$, distances between the valleys of the potential is small and hence the tunneling process between valleys might disturb the inflation dynamics (see Fig.", " \\[fig:tunneling\\] in Appendix). ", "We estimate the tunneling rate in Appendix and find that the tunneling process is irrelevant for sufficiently large ${ \\left\\langle {\\phi} \\right\\rangle }$ and ${ \\left\\langle {S} \\right\\rangle }$.", "\n\n[^4]: Here, the cosmic strings corresponds to the so-called global string which is expected to be stable if it stretches across the Hubble volume.", "\n\n[^5]: We assume that the universe is open and enough long-lived; otherwise the universe collapses before entering this phase.", "\n\n[^6]: There also exist domain walls surround by cosmic strings around which the phases of $\\phi$ and $S$ not on the inflaton trajectory wrap. ", "The energy density of this type is as large as $|{ \\left\\langle {\\phi} \\right\\rangle }||{ \\left\\langle {S} \\right\\rangle }^N|/M_{\\rm Pl}^{N-3}$.\n\n[^7]: Note that the superpotential in Eq.", " (\\[eq:superpotential\\]) is invariant under this rotation by further rotating $Y_3$ by $-1$.\n\n[^8]: We may explicitly extract the massless chiral multiplet in the diagonalized base of $\\rho$ and $\\sigma$, although the following discussion is not significantly altered.", "\n\n[^9]: The resultant superpotential is analogous to the one given in Ref.", " [@Kallosh:2014vja] to construct natural inflation, which in our terminology is given by $W \\propto X \\sin[\\rho/N]$. It should be emphasized that our model not only provides a simple ultra-violet completion to their model but also realizes the large decay constant via the phase locking mechanism at the same time.", "\n\n[^10]: See also Ref.[@Harigaya:2014pqa] for related discussion.", "\n\n[^11]: With the charge assignment given in Table 2, the bilinear term of the Higgs, $H_u H_d$ have the same charges as $S \\bar{S}$ and $\\phi \\bar{\\phi}$. The super potential terms $W \\supset Y_1 H_u H_d, Y_2 H_u H_d$ are allowed by the symmetry. ", "When the squared mass terms of the Higgs doublets ($m_{H_{u,d}}^2$), are smaller than those of $S$, $\\bar{S}$, $\\phi$ and $\\bar{\\phi}$ ($m_{S,\\phi}^2$), the vacuum with $| { \\left\\langle {H_{u,d}} \\right\\rangle }| \\ll |{ \\left\\langle {S} \\right\\rangle }|, |{ \\left\\langle {\\bar{S}} \\right\\rangle }| , |{ \\left\\langle {\\phi} \\right\\rangle }|, |{ \\left\\langle {\\bar{\\phi}} \\right\\rangle }|$ is destabilized. ", "In order to avoid such a problem we assume either $m_{H_{u,d}}^2 > m_{S,\\phi}^2$ or somewhat suppressed couplings between $Y_{1,2}$ and $H_{u}H_{d}$. The latter possibility can be realized, for example, by the so-called SUSY zero mechanism.", "\n\n[^12]: Here, we have assigned vanishing $R$-charges to the Higgs doublets so that the model is consistent with the Pure Gravity Mediation model[@PMG] where the so-called $\\mu$-term is generated from $R$-symmetry breaking [@Inoue:1991rk; @Casas:1992mk].", "\n\n[^13]: If $y_3$ is larger than $m/\\mpl$, inflation ends not by the fast roll of the inflaton but by the “waterfall\" of the higgs multiplets [@Harigaya:2014roa]. ", "In this case, the predictions on the spectral index and the tensor fraction are different from that of the standard natural inflation.", "\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "ArXiv" }

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[ "House of Dracula (Dec. 7, 1945)\n\nHouse of Dracula followed in the footsteps of Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (1943) and House of Frankenstein (1944), Universal Studios’ earlier “monster mash” movies. ", "It would be a few years before the genre descended into outright self parody, but House of Dracula is still campy and fun compared with the more serious scares of Universal classics like Dracula (1931) and The Wolf Man (1941).", "\n\nThe macabre goofiness begins with the opening credits, which drip down like blood dumped on the roof of an A-frame house, coalescing over a shot of a creepy old manse, high atop the cliffs on the shores of what looks suspiciously like the Pacific Ocean. ", "Like most Universal horror movies, House of Dracula seems to takes place in “Europe,” but the details are vague, and everyone speaks English, even though the characters have names like Holtz (Lionel Atwill), Siegfried (Ludwig Stössel), and Dr. Franz Edlemann (Onslow Stevens).", "\n\nThe last time we saw John Carradine as a tall, white-haired, and mustachioed Count Dracula, he was burned up in the sun halfway through the running time of House of Frankenstein. ", "How he came back to life is never explained. ", "How he manages to walk into Dr. Edlemann’s castle without being invited in is also a mystery. ", "But walk in he does, through an unlatched back door, and presents himself to Dr. Edlemann as “Baron Latos.” ", "Dr. Edlemann is a scientific genius with a hunchbacked assistant named Nina (Jane Adams) and a basement full of crazy doodads and contraptions. ", "He is also an expert on the affliction of vampirism. ", "Dracula wants to be cured, and Dr. Edlemann agrees to help him.", "\n\nThe plot thickens when, one evening shortly after sundown but before the rise of the full moon, Dracula is receiving a blood transfusion from Dr. Edlemann in his basement laboratory. ", "A nervous man named Lawrence Talbot (Lon Chaney, Jr.) appears in Dr. Edlemann’s waiting room. ", "Like Dracula, he is looking for a cure. ", "Dr. Edlemann’s pretty nurse, Miliza Morrelle (Martha O’Driscoll), tells Talbot he’ll have to be patient, but he refuses to wait. “", "There isn’t time!” ", "he shouts, and runs out of the castle, directly to the nearest police station, where he convinces them to lock him up. ", "He transforms into the dreaded Wolf Man while behind bars, which convinces Dr. Edlemann to take him on as a patient.", "\n\nLuckily for Talbot, the doctor is also an expert on lycanthropy, and he has a pseudoscientific explanation for Talbot’s condition. ", "Pressure upon certain parts of the brain, coupled with Talbot’s firmly held belief that the full moon can cause a change in his body, brings on self-hypnosis, and the glands that govern his metabolism get out of control. ", "Surgery to enlarge the cranial cavity would be a long and dangerous process. ", "Dr. Edlemann has a more sensible solution. ", "He, Nina, and Miliza are growing a hybrid tropical plant that produces a mold that can soften substances composed of calcium salts, like bone, which will allow Dr. Edlemann to enlarge Talbot’s cranium without surgery. (", "It will also allow him to dissolve Nina’s hump, which he promises her he will do once Talbot is cured.)", "\n\nMiliza refers to Talbot as a “young man,” and Dr. Edlemann calls him “my boy,” which are both strange appellations for a tired-looking 39-year-old alcoholic with slicked-back hair and a mustache. ", "His behavior is also strange, but that’s standard operating practice for the Wolf Man’s human alter ego in a Universal horror movie.", "\n\nAfter a setback, the impatient Talbot unsuccessfully attempts to commit suicide by jumping from the cliffs. ", "The doctor follows him down to one of the seaside caves, where he tells him the conditions are perfect for growing his mold spores, and not to despair. ", "While in the caves, the plot thickens once again when Talbot and Dr. Edlemann find Frankenstein’s monster (Glenn Strange), buried in mud along with the skeleton of Dr. Niemann, who revitalized him back in House of Frankenstein. ", "The villagers chased them into a pit of quicksand, and the mud flow brought them to the caves below Dr. Edlemann’s castle.", "\n\nThe altruistic Dr. Edlemann belts the monster down on an operating table, and wires him for revival, but his reasons for doing this are less clear than his reasons for helping Dracula and the Wolf Man. ", "He says that to not do so would be murder, since the monster is man’s responsibility. (", "Presumably, if he could speak, the monster would say, “Please bring me back to life so I can destroy you, your laboratory, your home, and everything you’ve worked for.”) ", "Nina and Talbot eventually manage to dissuade Dr. Edlemann from bringing the monster back to life. ", "However, the monster is still hooked up and ready to be reactivated, like a loaded gun carelessly left lying on the floor of a mental institution.", "\n\nThings start to go south at the halfway mark of House of Dracula, as they tend to when monsters mash. ", "Dr. Edlemann doubles up on the transfusions he’s giving to Dracula, which leads to a fateful accident. ", "Meanwhile, the irrepressible Count casts his hypnotic spell over Miliza, with whom he has a past.", "\n\nI thought that House of Dracula was a more satisfying picture than House of Frankenstein. ", "The way each monster is introduced is clumsy, but other than that the plot flows smoothly from beginning to end. ", "It’s a spooky good time that doesn’t strain to fit all of its ghoulish pieces into its 67-minute running time." ]

{ "pile_set_name": "Pile-CC" }

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[ "Patio pathway\n\nChristian Lacroix Carnets Andalous Patio PCL015/01 Wallpaper Roll. ", "Lark isn't the only one looking for a way to visit the carnival. ", "Mandy, an Afro-American young woman finds her role in life through the influence of others; her dedication to her goal is unique. ", "Being of modular design it can be grouped together to create a bespoke heating system to meet specific requirements. ", "I just knew they were in my dreams but I never saw his face. ", "When kids learned to work on the farm, both at home and for the neighbors. ", "This book urges readers to practice mindfulness-deliberately allowing physical sensations and emotions to surface so they can be examined and released. ", "Political Economy Studies builds on this to address the understanding of what makes a reform successful, going beyond a quantification of the benefits of reform.", "\n\nTriple LED security spotlight. ", "The light activate sensor turns the spot light on and off automatically. ", "Ideal for both interior and exterior use, with an ground spike that is easily pushed into the soil. ", "Solar powered meaning no additional costs to lighting up the garden\n\nweather resistant stainless steelweather proofno wiring required safe to use each solar light is installed with 1xn1-mh battery included)auto day and night sensorpowered by the suneasy to assemble and installationilluminated automatically when darkness falls.", "\n\nAdd an explosion of colour to your garden with a solar powered fibre optic garden light. ", "Solar powered, the lights will charge all day and then light up at night producing a fantastic light display and there's no mains wiring which means it's easy to install\n\nThese stunning, heavy cast, driveway or patio lamp posts are the perfect finishing touch for your entrances, driveways, patios or any type of garden balustrade. ", "Family ties are still very strong and the founder, Eric Schubert, is still very much involved in the design and creation processes\n\n2 x 16. ", "His passion in life was metal and the many wonderful items that could be created from this versatile raw material. ", "These stunning, heavy cast, driveway or patio lamp posts are the perfect finishing touch for your entrances, driveways, patios or any type of garden balustrade\n\nFamily ties are still very strong and the founder, Eric Schubert, is still very much involved in the design and creation processes. ", "His passion in life was metal and the many wonderful items that could be created from this versatile raw material\n\nDimensions (Approx): Total Height: 109. ", "The lantern is supplied with a brass bulb holder. ", "2cm Weight: 13. ", "2 x 16. ", "This set features our stunning black Gothic lantern and patio post. ", "His passion in life was metal and the many wonderful items that could be created from this versatile raw material\n\nFamily ties are still very strong and the founder, Eric Schubert, is still very much involved in the design and creation processes. ", "The lantern is supplied with a brass bulb holder. ", "We recommend all Lanterns are fitted by a qualified electrician\n\nThe light stays on as long as there is a presence in the beam, but automatically switches off 30 seconds after movement ceases. ", "Built in daylight sensor ensures the light will only operate in darkness. ", "100,000 hours of life\n\nIt's made from high quality aluminium and it adds the perfect touch to your Outdoor. ", "This beautiful black and silver Philips myOutdoor post light accompanies you with warm white energy saving light on your pathway or entrance.", "\n\n2. ", "Suitable for stairways, paths, entryways, patios, etc. ", "As the power of the solar panel depends on the sunlight, the LED luminous time is affected by weather, seasons, places, etc. ", "Don't strike the product so as not to cause irreversible damages. ", "5 * 10 * 3. ", "7 * 3. ", "5 * 2. ", "4cm / 5\n\nEasy to install. ", "Enjoy lighting with LE. ", "About LE Lighting EVER, abbreviated to LE, focuses on creating the best lighting experience. ", "Only high end LED and advanced optical design are adopted. ", "2m, 90 degrees detection angle. ", "Protected against splashing water from all angles. ", "No electricity cost\n\nUsually dispatched within 1-2 business days\nAvailable at Amazon.co.uk\n\nPathways Calendar 2020\n\n9.99\n\nDream of fantastical destinations with this 16-month Pathways calendar for 2020, that features some of the world's most gorgeous paths! ", "The photography includes amazing routes to beautiful places, such as Durdle Door, the Dolomites or the Himalayas! ", "The calendar features a 4-month overview at the b...\n\nAvailable at CalendarClub.co.uk\n\nEnchanted Pathways Calendar 2020\n\n10.99\n\nInspired by the mysterious encounter of nature and light, award-winning Dutch photographer, Lars van de Goor, depicts woodland scenes from his travels around Europe in the 16-month Enchanted Pathways calendar for 2020! ", "Follow the scenic routes through the forest and admire the rays of sunshine ligh...\n\nAvailable at CalendarClub.co.uk\n\nPatio magic - Patio Magic Patio Cleaner - 2.5L\n\n9.37\n\nUse on outdoor hard surface No need for scrubbing and pressure washing Visible results in 2-4 days Biodegradable and children and pets need not be excluded from treated areas once dry.", "\n\n3 days\nAvailable at Electrical Europe\n\nPatio magic - Patio Magic Patio Cleaner - 5L\n\n17.63\n\nUse on outdoor hard surface No need for scrubbing and pressure washing Visible results in 2-4 days Biodegradable and children and pets need not be excluded from treated areas once dry.", "\n\n3 days\nAvailable at Electrical Europe\n\nLetting Go : The Pathway of Surrender\n\n11.49\n\nLetting Go describes a simple and effective means by which to let go of the obstacles to Enlightenment and become free of negativity During the many decades of the author's clinical psychiatric practice the primary aim was to seek the most effective ways to relieve human suffering in all of its man...\n\nAvailable at shop4world.com\n\nAtriarch - An Unending Pathway (Music CD)\n\n7.19\n\nAvailable at Base.com\n\nSecrets of the Sky - Pathway (Music CD)\n\n9.49\n\nAvailable at Base.com\n\nVan meuwen - Patio Bag\n\n7.50\n\nAvailable at Van Meuwen\n\nDamart - Damart Patio Heater\n\n49.00\n\nPatio Heater,No Colour,One Size.", "\n\nAvailable at Damart\n\nPia jewellery - Polished Pathways Drop Earrings\n\n50.00\n\nGraduating pebbles of reflective sterling silver.", "\n\nAvailable at Pia Jewellery\n\nPerfect Patio Collection\n\n25.97\n\nThis great value Patio Collection will transform your outdoor space at a fraction of the usual price. ", "Don?t let your patio pots sit empty and neglected.", "\n\nAvailable at Thompson & Morgan\n\nPia jewellery - Fated Pathways Silver Cuff Bangle\n\n85.00\n\nA substantial band of gleaming sterling silver in an easy­to­wear cuff style.", "\n\nAvailable at Pia Jewellery\n\nPia jewellery - Prismatic Pathway Amethyst & Tourmaline\n\n190.00\n\nDeeply compelling marquise of tourmaline flank a brilliant amethyst, accented with diamonds, set in 9ct gold.", "\n\nAvailable at Pia Jewellery\n\n3 Patio Planters\n\n14.99\n\nThese patio planters are also ideal for strawberries, tomatoes, potatoes and other types of fruit and vegetables and can also be used for carrying garden waste or refuse, truly multi purpose! ", "Please note that the Seed Potatoes are sold Separately. ", "Patio Planters just £4\n\nAvailable at Gardening Direct\n\nPatio Pot Essentials Kit\n\n14.99\n\nAll perfect for potting up your patio plants this year!. 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", "Technical Data: This luminaire is compatible with bulbs of the energy classes: A+ to E On a scale of A++ (most efficient) to E (less efficient). ", "The clear polycarbonate (PC) shade highlights the high-quality design\n\nUsually dispatched within 1-2 business days\nAvailable at Amazon.co.uk\n\nT&m - Magnolia Patio Collection\n\n29.99\n\nThis magnificent Magnolia Patio Collection contains two of our best patio magnolias which will perfectly compliment each other in borders and patios.", "\n\nBrintons Patio Magic Concentrate Patio & driveway cleaner 5L. It covers 170m² so you can ensure areas of all sizes are treated. ", "This patio & driveway cleaner kills and controls most algae moss and mould on driveways and patios in a single application\n\nAvailable at B & Q\n\nVan meuwen - Patio Pot (Small)\n\n19.97\n\nThis charming planter features punchable holes in its base, making it superb for a wide range of uses. ", "This stylish and versatile patio pot is ideal for adding sophistication to your patio displays and is perfect for shrubs, bedding plants and even patio vegetables.", "\n\nAvailable at Van Meuwen\n\nPhilips - Philips Sensor Bluesky Grey\n\n6.05\n\nUsually dispatched within 24 hours\nAvailable at Amazon.co.uk\n\nDave Holland Octet - Pathways (Premium Edition) (Music CD)\n\n24.69\n\nAvailable at Base.com\n\nT&m - Vegetable Patio Bags\n\n14.99\n\nThese sturdy 40ltr bags are ideal for growing your favourite vegetables on the patio. ", "Perfect for patio crops of potatoes, sweet potatoes, rhubarb and asparagus. ", "The stitched sides and strong carrying handles make these hard wearing, reusable bags both durable and portable.", "\n\nAvailable at Thompson & Morgan\n\nFederal Patio Door Security Bolt\n\n22.77\n\nThe Federal Patio Door Security Bolt is also available in keyed alike groups. ", "It has a fully reversible bolt, is quick and easy to fit, and is packed with screws suitable for timber, aluminium, or uPVC\n\nAvailable at Locks Online\n\nT&m - Patio Pond Kit\n\n18.99\n\nThere's room for a calming water feature in even the smallest of outdoor spaces. ", "Our Patio Pond Kit is quick, clean and easy to install, allowing you to grow three beautiful aquatic plant species on your patio or balcony.", "\n\nAvailable at Thompson & Morgan\n\nT&m - Clematis Patio Collection\n\n29.99\n\nEach of these free-flowering varieties has a neat, compact habit. ", "This makes them perfect for growing in patio containers, trained onto an obelisk or against a fence or wall. ", "Transform your patio with this eye-catching collection of Clematis." ]

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[ "Coil embolisation of intercostal artery for operative localisation of spinal dural arterio-venous fistulae.", "\nWe describe a new method of intra-operative localisation of spinal dural arterio-venous fistulae, involving pre-operative embolisation of the appropriate intercostal artery. ", "This method has significant advantages over other forms of spinal level localisation and has not previously been described." ]

{ "pile_set_name": "PubMed Abstracts" }

[ 0.0010480808559805155, 0.0007826571818441153, 0.0005831117159686983 ]

[ "Q:\n\nHow to find whole substring in string?", "\n\nI have a string and I have to check if that string contains defined substring I need to do some work and otherwise, I should return some error.", "\nI have the following code:\nfunction isContains(myString) {\n let subString = 'test1234';\n if(myString.includes(subString)) {\n // to do some work\n } else {\n // return some error.", "\n }\n}\n\nbut the problem is if myString = 'my-string-test1-rrr' its condition return true. ", "\nHow can I get true only in case when the whole subString was included in myString?", "\n\nA:\n\nUse indexOf() instead.", "\nfunction isContains(myString) {\n let subString = 'test1234';\n if(myString.indexOf(subString) > -1) {\n // to do some work\n } else {\n // return some error.", "\n }\n}\n\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "StackExchange" }

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[ "A Federação Portuguesa de Futebol esperou até ao último dia do prazo estipulado pela FIFA para divulgar a convocatória para os Jogos Olímpicos, dadas as dificuldades para elaborar a lista, e ainda assim Rui Jorge viu-se confrontado com uma surpresa quarenta minutos antes da conferência de imprensa.", "\n\nO selecionador olímpico viu-se privado de mais um jogador, que não foi cedido pelo respetivo clube (não estão obrigado a fazê-lo), e teve de apresentar apenas 17 nomes, incluindo Salvador Agra, Sérgio Oliveira e André Martins, os três jogadores acima dos 23 anos permitidos pelo regulamento.", "\n\nDos 35 jogadores incluídos na pré-convocatória, Rui Jorge só conseguiu a cedência de 11: Bruno Varela, Joel Pereira, Edgar Ié, Ricardo Esgaio, Tiago Ilori, Tobias Figueiredo, Bruno Fernandes, Francisco Ramos, Sérgio Oliveira, Carlos Mané e Gonçalo Paciência.", "\n\nEntre os nomes da pré-convocatória que não entram na lista final contam-se seis campeões europeus com a seleção principal (Raphael Guerreiro, William Carvalho, Renato Sanches, André Gomes, João Mário e Rafa), e mais 18 jogadores: João Miguel Silva, José Sá, João Cancelo, Nélson Semedo, Paulo Oliveira, Rúben Semedo, Bernardo Silva, Diogo Jota, João Carlos Teixeira, Rony Lopes, Rúben Neves, André Silva, Gelson Martins, Gonçalo Guedes, Iuri Medeiros, Ivan Cavaleiro, Ricardo Horta e Ricardo Pereira.", "\n\nMas quando se viu obrigado a procurar alternativas, mesmo fora da lista alargada, Rui Jorge ainda viu negada a cedência de mais oito jogadores, conforme o próprio revelou. ", "O que dá, seguramente, mais de vinte jogadores recusados.", "\n\nRui Jorge lá conseguiu então elaborar uma lista de 18 jogadores (julgava ele), mas perante a surpresa de última hora, que terá sido Rafa Soares, obriga o técnico a procurar uma alternativa ao longo desta quinta-feira, já que à meia-noite termina o prazo para entregar a convocatória. ", "Uma lista que terá também quatro suplentes, mas cujos nomes a Federação Portuguesa de Futebol não revela.", "\n\nA seleção olímpica concentra-se na próxima segunda-feira, dia 18 de julho, e viaja para o Brasil cinco dias depois. ", "A equipa das quinas estará na aldeia olímpica a partir de 29 de julho.", "\n\nOs 17 convocados:\n\nGuarda-redes: Bruno Varela (V. Setúbal) e Joel Pereira (Manchester United);\n\n\n\nDefesas: Edgar Ié (Villarreal), Ricardo Esgaio (Sporting), Tiago Ilori (Liverpool) e Tobias Figueiredo (Nacional)\n\n\n\nMédios: André Martins (sem clube), Bruno Fernandes (Udinese), Fábio Sturgeon (Belenenses), Francisco Ramos (D. Chaves), Sérgio Oliveira (FC Porto), Tiago Silva (Feirense) e Tomás Podstawski (FC Porto);\n\n\n\nAvançados: Carlos Mané (Sporting), Gonçalo Paciência (FC Porto), Nuno Santos (V. Setúbal) e Salvador Agra (Nacional)." ]

{ "pile_set_name": "OpenWebText2" }

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[ "---\nabstract: 'We introduce a new class of states for bosonic quantum fields which extend tensor network states to the continuum and generalize continuous matrix product states (cMPS) to spatial dimensions $d\\geq 2$. By construction, they are Euclidean invariant, and are genuine continuum limits of discrete tensor network states. ", "Admitting both a functional integral and an operator representation, they share the important properties of their discrete counterparts: expressiveness, invariance under gauge transformations, simple rescaling flow, and compact expressions for the $N$-point functions of local observables. ", "While we discuss mostly the continuous tensor network states extending Projected Entangled Pair States (PEPS), we propose a generalization bearing similarities with the continuum Multi-scale Entanglement Renormalization Ansatz (cMERA).'", "\nauthor:\n- Antoine Tilloy\n- 'J. Ignacio Cirac'\nbibliography:\n- 'main.bib'\ntitle: Continuous Tensor Network States for Quantum Fields\n---\n\nIntroduction\n============\n\nTensor Network States (TNS) provide an efficient parameterization of physically relevant many-body wavefunctions on the lattice [@cirac2009-rev; @evenbly2014-rev]. ", "Obtained from a contraction of low-rank tensors on so-called virtual indices, they economically approximate the states of systems with local interactions in thermal equilibrium. ", "Their number of parameters scales only polynomially with the lattice size [@molnar2015; @hastings2006], circumventing the exponential growth of the Hilbert space dimension. ", "TNS have led to powerful numerical methods to compute the physical properties of complex system [@orus2014-rev; @orus2008-nonunitary_tebd; @orus2012-corner], most notably in one spatial dimension $d=1$, where Matrix Product States (MPS) [@fannes1992], the simplest incarnation of TNS, are at the basis of what is arguably the most successful method to describe strongly correlated systems [@white1992; @white1993; @schollwock2005]. ", "In higher dimensions $d\\geq 2$, accurate results [@nielsen2017] have also been obtained using Projected Entangled-Pair states (PEPS) [@verstraete2004], a natural generalization of MPS. ", "Another family of TNS, Multi-Scale Renormalization Ansatz (MERA) [@vidal2007], has proved well suited to describe scale invariant states [@montangero2009; @evenbly2013] appearing in critical phenomena.", "\n\nBeyond numerical computations, TNS provide important insights into the nature of many-body quantum systems, and have helped describe and classify their physical properties. ", "By design, their entanglement obeys the area law [@srednicki1993; @wolf2008; @eisert2010], which is a fundamental property of low energy states of systems with local interactions. ", "They enable a succinct classification of symmetry protected [@pollmann2010; @chen2011; @schuch2011; @chen2013] and topological phases of matter [@schuch2010; @bultinck2017]. ", "TNS also have a built-in bulk-boundary correspondence [@cirac2011], which makes close connections to physical phenomena appearing in exotic materials [@laughlin1983; @wen1991]. ", "Finally, they can be used to build toy models illustrating the holographic principle and the celebrated AdS/CFT correspondence [@swingle2012; @pastawski2015; @hayden2016].", "\n\nFor regular spin lattices, PEPS assign a tensor to each lattice site, with $2z$ virtual and one physical (spin) indices, where $z$ is the coordination number. ", "The virtual indices are contracted according to the lattice geometry, yielding a wavefunction for the spin degrees of freedom. ", "This description is particularly useful in translationally invariant systems, as this symmetry may simply be imposed by choosing the same tensor on each site. ", "For MERA [@vidal2007; @vidal2008], a tree-like structure of two types of tensors is used. ", "In both cases, the whole many-body wavefunction is determined by one or few tensors, which encode all the physical properties.", "\n\nAn important challenge in the theory of TNS is the generalization from lattice to continuous systems. ", "Such an extension would allow the direct study of Quantum Field Theories, without the need for a prior breaking of spatial symmetries with a discretization. ", "Further, the continuum provides a whole range of exact and approximate analytic techniques (such as exact Gaussian functional integrals, saddle-point approximations, or diagrammatic expansions) that have no obvious discrete counterparts and that could provide useful additions to the TNS toolbox.", "\n\nA natural way to carry out such a program is to simply take the continuum limit of a TNS, by letting the lattice spacing tend to zero while appropriately rescaling the tensors. ", "In fact, this has been done in one spatial dimension, $d=1$, where it yields continuous matrix product states (cMPS) [@verstraete2010; @haegeman2013]. ", "In higher dimensions, however, the task does not seem trivial. ", "Naive extensions of cMPS have a preferred spatial direction and break Euclidean symmetries [@jennings2015]. ", "In [@jennings2015], a proposal for cPEPS was put forward to overcome such a limitation, but the resulting state was no longer obtained from the continuum limit of a TNS. ", "Thus, so far there seems to be no fully satisfactory way of extending TNS to the continuum in $d\\geq 2$.\n\nIn this article we propose a definition of continuous tensor network states (cTNS) that naturally extends TNS to the continuum. ", "We obtain them as a genuine continuum limit of TNS, but manage to preserve Euclidean invariance. ", "As in previous works [@jennings2015; @caputa2017-prl; @caputa2017-jhep], we exploit the similarity between a tensor contraction over the indices lying on the links of a tensor network and a functional integral over a field living on the continuum limit of this mesh. ", "The key difference lies in the way the continuum limit is taken in higher dimensions: As we shall argue, the $d=1$ case of cMPS is too peculiar to be directly extended.", "\n\nThe first definition of cTNS we will propose in section \\[sec:definitions\\] takes the form of a functional integral over auxiliary scalar fields as advertised. ", "From this definition, which makes local Euclidean invariance manifest, we will derive an operator representation similar to the one used for cMPS. ", "Importantly, we will show in section \\[sec:discrete\\] how this ansatz can be obtained from a continuum limit of a discrete TNS. ", "We will then study some of its properties reminiscent of the discrete: its ability to approximate (possibly inefficiently) all states (\\[subsec:expressiveness\\]), its redundancy under some so called Gauge transformations (\\[subsec:gaugeinvariance\\]), which play a crucial role for PEPS, its flow under scaling transformations (\\[subsec:renormalization\\]), and its cMPS approximation in some carefully chosen limit (\\[subsec:recovering\\_cmps\\]). ", "We will then propose various methods to carry computations with Gaussian and non-Gaussian cTNS (\\[sec:computations\\]). ", "While most of our approach is aimed at the continuum limit of PEPS, we will finally generalize it to MERA-like states (and more exotic TNS) in arbitrary dimensions by including a metric and restricting physical fields to a boundary (\\[sec:generalizations\\]).", "\n\nContinuous tensor network states {#sec:definitions}\n================================\n\nWe start by giving two equivalent definitions of continuous tensor network states, leveraging a functional integral and an operator representation. ", "Our objective at this stage is only to provide a definition of a class of states for quantum fields, with only a crude intuition for why such an object could indeed be a good definition of a cTNS. ", "We forgo the derivation of this cTNS from a class of discrete tensor networks to the following section.", "\n\nFunctional integral representation\n----------------------------------\n\n### State definition\n\nWe begin with the functional integral representation. ", "It will be the most direct to derive from the discrete and .", "\n\n\\[def:pathintegral\\] A continuous tensor network state (cTNS) of a bosonic quantum field on a domain $\\Omega \\subset \\mathds{R}^d$ with boundary $\\partial \\Omega$, is a state ${| V,B,\\alpha \\rangle }$ parameterized by 2 functions $V$ and $\\alpha$: $\\mathds{R}^D\\rightarrow \\mathds{C}$, and a boundary functional $B$: $L^2(\\partial \\Omega) \\rightarrow \\mathds{C}$ defined by the functional integral on an auxiliary $D$-component field $\\phi$: $$\\label{eq:pathintegral}\n\\begin{split}\n &{| V,B,\\alpha \\rangle } = \\\\\n &\\int\\! ", "\\mathcal{D} \\phi \\, B(\\phi|_{\\partial \\Omega}) \\exp\\bigg\\{\\!\\!-\\!\\!\\int_\\Omega {\\mathrm{d}}^d x \\; \\frac{1}{2}\\sum_{k=1}^D\\left[\\nabla \\phi_k(x)\\right]^2 \\\\\n &\\hskip3.0cm+ V[\\phi(x)] - \\alpha[\\phi(x)] \\, \\psi^\\dagger(x)\\bigg\\} {| 0 \\rangle },\n\\end{split}$$ where ${| 0 \\rangle }$ is the physical Fock vacuum state, $[\\psi(x),\\psi^\\dagger(y)] = \\delta^d(x-y)$, $\\phi=[\\phi_k]_{k=1}^D$. The functions $\\alpha$ and $V$ may depend explicitly on position.", "\n\n![**", "Functional integral representation** – In the discrete (left) a tensor network state is obtained from a contraction of auxiliary indices connecting the elementary tensors with each other and with a boundary tensor. ", "In the continuum (right), the contraction is replaced by a functional integral , the auxiliary indices by fields $\\phi$, and the boundary tensor by a boundary functional $B$. []{data-label=\"fig:functional\"}](ctns_verbose.pdf){width=\"0.99\\columnwidth\"}\n\nThe auxiliary $D$-component field $\\phi$, which is integrated over in the functional integral, is the continuous equivalent of the auxiliary bond indices that are contracted in tensor network states (see Fig. ", "\\[fig:functional\\]). ", "This intuition will be made more precise in the next section. ", "For this reason, we call $D$ the *bond field dimension*. ", "As we shall see in section \\[sec:properties\\], the bond field dimension $D$ bears similarities with the bond dimension $\\chi$ of discrete tensor network states.", "\n\nIf $\\Omega$ is $\\mathds{R}^d$ or a torus with periodic boundary conditions, $B$ can simply be set to $1$. More generally, if $\\partial \\Omega \\neq \\emptyset$, the boundary functional could induce [*e.g.* ]{}:\n\n1. ", " Dirichlet boundary conditions: $B(\\phi|_{\\partial \\Omega}) \\sim \\delta(\\phi|_{\\partial \\Omega})$ fixing $\\phi|_{\\partial \\Omega}=0$ in the functional integral,\n\n2. ", " Neumann boundary conditions: $B(\\phi|_{\\partial \\Omega}) \\sim \\delta(\\nabla \\phi\\cdot \\mathbf{n})$ fixing $\\nabla \\phi\\cdot \\mathbf{n}|_{\\partial \\Omega}=0$ where $\\mathbf{n}$ is normal to $\\partial \\Omega$,\n\n3. ", " Something more general, given [*e.g.* ]{}by a quasi local functional: $$\\label{eq:extendedbc}\n B(\\phi|_{\\partial \\Omega}) = \\exp\\left\\{-\\oint_{\\partial \\Omega} {\\mathrm{d}}^{d-1} x \\; \\mathcal{L}\\left[\\phi(x),\\nabla\\phi(x)\\right]\\right\\}$$ where $\\mathcal{L}$ is a function from $\\mathds{R}^{(d+1)D}$ to $\\mathds{C}$. This latter option will be generated naturally when we discuss gauge invariance in \\[subsec:gaugeinvariance\\].", "\n\nWe may rewrite expression more explicitly as a sum over unnormalized field coherent states. ", "Introducing the massless free field probability measure ${\\mathrm{d}}\\mu(\\phi)$ for the auxiliary field: $${\\mathrm{d}}\\mu(\\phi) = \\mathcal{D} \\phi \\exp\\left[-\\frac{1}{2}\\int_\\Omega {\\mathrm{d}}^d x \\; \\sum_{k=1}^D\\left[\\nabla \\phi_k(x)\\right]^2\\right],$$ and a complex amplitude $\\mathcal{A}_V(\\phi)$: $$\\mathcal{A}_V(\\phi)= B(\\phi|_{\\partial \\Omega})\\exp\\left\\{-\\int_\\Omega {\\mathrm{d}}^d x \\; V[\\phi(x)] \\right\\}$$ yields: $${| V,B,\\alpha \\rangle } = \\int {\\mathrm{d}}\\mu(\\phi) \\, \\mathcal{A}_V(\\phi)\\, {| \\alpha(\\phi) \\rangle },$$ where ${| \\alpha(\\phi) \\rangle }=\\exp\\left\\{\\int_\\Omega {\\mathrm{d}}^d x \\; \\alpha[\\phi(x)]\\,\\psi^\\dagger(x)\\right\\} {| 0 \\rangle }$ is an unnormalized field coherent state. ", "Hence, just like cMPS in dimension $1$, cTNS are a generalization of field coherent states.", "\n\n### N-particle Wave function\n\nA generic state ${| \\Psi \\rangle }$ in the bosonic Fock space $\\mathcal{F}[L^2(\\mathds{R}^d,\\mathds{C})]$ can be expanded into a sum of $n$ particle wave functions $\\varphi_n$: $$\\label{eq:wavefunctionrepresentation}\n{| \\Psi \\rangle } = \\sum_{n=0}^{+\\infty} \\int_{\\Omega^n}\\!\\!\\!\\!{\\mathrm{d}}x_1 {\\makebox[1em][c]{.\\hfil.\\hfil.}}{\\mathrm{d}}x_n \\frac{\\varphi_n(x_1,{\\makebox[1em][c]{.\\hfil.\\hfil.}},x_n)}{n!} \\; ", "\\psi^\\dagger(x_1){\\makebox[1em][c]{.\\hfil.\\hfil.}}\\psi^\\dagger(x_n) {| 0 \\rangle }$$ where $\\varphi_n$ is a completely symmetric function of its coordinates. ", "Simply expanding the exponential of eq. ", "gives, for the cTNS ${| V,B,\\alpha \\rangle }$: $$\\label{eq:wave-path}\n \\varphi_n(x_1,\\cdots,x_n) = \\! ", "\\int \\! {", "\\mathrm{d}}\\mu(\\phi) \\mathcal{A}_V(\\phi)\\, \\alpha[\\phi(x_1)] \\cdots \\alpha[\\phi(x_n)]$$ It provides an equivalent definition of the cTNS.", "\n\n### Correlation functions\n\nA state is also fully characterized by its (equal time) correlation functions. ", "To compute them, we first introduce the generating functionals for real sources $j',j$: $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\mathcal{Z}_{j',j}&=\\frac{{\\langle V,B,\\alpha |} \\exp\\left(\\int_\\Omega j'\\cdot \\psi^\\dagger \\right) \\exp\\left(\\int_\\Omega j\\cdot \\psi \\right) {| V,B,\\alpha \\rangle }}{\\langle V,B,\\alpha|V,B,\\alpha\\rangle} \\nonumber\\\\\n\\widetilde{\\mathcal{Z}}_{j',j}&=\\frac{{\\langle V,B,\\alpha |} \\exp\\left(\\int_\\Omega j\\cdot \\psi \\right) \\exp\\left(\\int_\\Omega j'\\cdot \\psi^\\dagger \\right) {| V,B,\\alpha \\rangle }}{\\langle V,B,\\alpha|V,B,\\alpha\\rangle}\\label{eq:ordered-def}\\end{aligned}$$ They generate the normal ordered and anti normal ordered correlation functions respectively. ", "For example, it is straightforward to verify that: $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\label{eq:correlexample}\n\\langle\\psi^\\dagger(x) \\psi(y)\\rangle&:= \\frac{\\langle V,B,\\alpha | \\psi^\\dagger(x) \\psi(y)| V,B,\\alpha\\rangle}{\\langle V,B,\\alpha | V,B,\\alpha\\rangle}\\\\\n&= \\frac{\\delta}{\\delta j'(x)}\\frac{\\delta}{\\delta j(y)} \\mathcal{Z}_{j',j} \\bigg|_{j,j'=0}.\\end{aligned}$$ Using the formula for the overlap of (unnormalized) field coherent states, $$\\langle \\beta |\\alpha\\rangle = \\exp\\left(\\int_{\\Omega}{\\mathrm{d}}x\\, \\beta^*(x)\\,\\alpha(x)\\right)$$ and writing $\\mathcal{N}=\\langle V,B,\\alpha|V,B,\\alpha\\rangle$ we get:\n\n$$\\begin{aligned}\n\\label{eq:antiordered}\n\\widetilde{\\mathcal{Z}}_{j',j}&= \\frac{1}{\\mathcal{N}}\\int\\!{\\mathrm{d}}\\mu(\\phi') {\\mathrm{d}}\\mu (\\phi) B(\\phi) B^*(\\phi')\\,\\exp\\left\\{\\!-\\!\\!\\int_\\Omega \\,V^*[\\phi'] + V[\\phi]-\\left(\\alpha^*[\\phi']+j\\right)\\cdot\\left(\\alpha[\\phi]+j'\\right)\\right\\}\\!.\\end{aligned}$$\n\nWe observe an important fact which is that the function $\\alpha$ appears squared, hence an $\\alpha$ quadratic in the field already brings non-Gaussianities. ", "To compute $\\mathcal{Z}_{j',j}$, one applies the Baker-Campbell-Hausdorff (BCH) formula to to push annihilation operators to the right and get back to a computation of field coherent state overlaps. ", "We obtain: $$\\label{eq:ordered}\n\\begin{split}\n&\\mathcal{Z}_{j',j}= \\frac{1}{\\mathcal{N}} \\int\\!{\\mathrm{d}}\\mu(\\phi') {\\mathrm{d}}\\mu (\\phi)B(\\phi) B^*(\\phi')\\,\\exp\\bigg\\{ \\!-\\!\\!\\int_\\Omega \\,V^*[\\phi'(x)] + V[\\phi] -\\alpha^*[\\phi']\\cdot\\alpha[\\phi]-j\\cdot\\alpha[\\phi]-j'\\cdot \\alpha^*[\\phi']\\bigg\\},\n\\end{split}$$ hence the same as but for the removal of the product $j\\cdot j'$, which is responsible for the divergent equal point contributions upon functional differentiation.", "\n\nOperator representation\n-----------------------\n\n### State definition\n\nWe now provide an equivalent operator representation of cTNS. ", "For simplicity we restrict ourselves to domains of $\\mathds{R}^d$ that can be split into Cartesian products $\\Omega=[-T/2,T/2] \\times S$ where $\\partial S = \\emptyset$. This is not strictly necessary but substantially simplifies the definition.", "\n\n![**", "Operator representation** – Tensor networks in $d \\geq 2$ can be defined through an auxiliary dynamics in $d-1$ dimensions. ", "In the continuum, the physical $d$ dimensional quantum field ${| V,B,\\alpha \\rangle }$ is obtained through a joint non-unitary evolution (eq. ) ", "with an auxiliary $d-1$ dimensional quantum field ${| \\text{aux}_\\tau \\rangle }$.[]{data-label=\"fig:operator\"}](operator_boundary_new.pdf){width=\"0.99\\columnwidth\"}\n\n\\[def:operator\\] For a domain $\\Omega$ that can be written as a cartesian product $\\Omega=[-T/2,T/2] \\times S$, we write $x=(\\tau,{\\mathbf{x}})$ where $\\tau \\in [-T/2,T/2]$ and ${\\mathbf{x}}\\in S$. A cTNS is then defined as: $$\\label{eq:operator}\n\\begin{split}\n{| V,B,\\alpha \\rangle }={\\mathrm{tr}}\\bigg[\\hat{B} \\mathcal{T} \\exp\\bigg(\\!\\!-\\!\\!\\!\\! ", "\\int\\limits_{-T/2}^{T/2} \\!\\!\\!{\\mathrm{d}}\\tau \\!\\int_S \\!{\\mathrm{d}}{\\mathbf{x}}\\;\\sum_{k=1}^D \\frac{\\left[\\hat{\\pi}_k({\\mathbf{x}})\\right]^2 }{2} \\\\\n+ \\frac{[\\nabla \\hat{\\phi}_k({\\mathbf{x}})]^2}{2} + V[\\hat{\\phi}({\\mathbf{x}})] - \\alpha[\\hat{\\phi}({\\mathbf{x}})]\\,\\psi^\\dagger(\\tau,{\\mathbf{x}}) \\bigg)\\bigg]{| 0 \\rangle }\n\\end{split}$$ where $\\mathcal{T}$ is the $\\tau$-ordering operator, $\\hat{\\phi}_k({\\mathbf{x}})$ and $\\hat{\\pi}_k({\\mathbf{x}})$ are $k$ independent canonically conjugated pairs of (auxiliary) field *operators*: $[\\hat{\\phi}_k({\\mathbf{x}}),\\hat{\\phi}_l({\\mathbf{y}})]=0$, $[\\hat{\\pi}({\\mathbf{x}})_k,\\hat{\\pi}_l({\\mathbf{y}})]=0$, and $[\\hat{\\phi}_k({\\mathbf{x}}),\\hat{\\pi}_l({\\mathbf{y}})]=i \\delta_{k,l}\\,\\delta^{d-1}({\\mathbf{x}}-{\\mathbf{y}})$. These operators act on $\\mathscr{H}_\\text{aux} =\\mathcal{F}[L^2(S)]^D $, [*i.e.* ]{}$D$ copies of a bosonic Fock space on a $d-1$ dimensional space. ", "The trace is taken over this auxiliary Hilbert space. ", "As before, $V$ and $\\alpha$ may depend on ${\\mathbf{x}}$ and $\\tau$.\n\nThe operator $\\hat{B}$ acts on $\\mathscr{H}_\\text{aux}$ and fixes the boundary conditions, [*e.g.* ]{}$\\hat{B}=\\mathds{1}$ encodes periodic boundary conditions on the coordinate $\\tau$. Another natural option is to take $\\hat{B} = {| \\text{in} \\rangle }{\\langle \\text{out} |}$, which corresponds to the situation of Fig. ", "\\[fig:operator\\].", "\n\nDefinitions \\[def:pathintegral\\] and \\[def:operator\\] are equivalent for this subclass of domains. ", "The proof is straightforward. ", "One just applies the techniques of standard QFT textbooks to go from operator to functional integral representations with $\\tau=it$ (see [*e.g.* ]{}[@peskin1995; @zinn2010path]). ", "Mainly, one discretizes the $\\tau$-ordered product in into a finite product of terms. ", "One then inserts resolutions of the identity in the field basis ${| \\phi \\rangle }$ at every time step $\\Delta \\tau$ and writes each resulting overlap in the conjugate momentum basis ${| \\pi \\rangle }$. ", "Going back to the continuum limit yields a phase space functional integral which reduces to the formula of equation upon Gaussian integration of the conjugate momenta $\\pi$.\n\nThe boundary operator of is related to the boundary functional of by: $$B(\\phi) ={\\langle \\phi_\\text{in} |} \\hat{B} {| \\phi_\\text{out} \\rangle }$$ where ${| \\phi_\\text{out} \\rangle }$ and ${| \\phi_\\text{in} \\rangle }$ are eigenstates of the auxiliary field operators $\\hat{\\phi}({\\mathbf{x}})$. The auxiliary field $\\phi$ decomposes into $\\phi = \\phi_\\text{in} + \\phi_\\text{out}$ where $\\phi_\\text{in}$ (resp. ", "$\\phi_\\text{out}$) has support on $\\partial \\Omega_\\text{in}$ (resp. ", "$\\partial \\Omega_\\text{out}$) with $\\partial \\Omega = \\partial\\Omega_\\text{in} \\cup \\partial \\Omega_\\text{out}$.\n\nAs before we may propose a repackaging of formula . ", "Introducing the Hamiltonian density $\\mathcal{H}({\\mathbf{x}})=\\mathcal{H}_0({\\mathbf{x}}) + V[\\hat{\\phi}({\\mathbf{x}})]$ with $\\mathcal{H}_0({\\mathbf{x}})=\\sum_{k=1}^D \\frac{[\\hat{\\pi}_k({\\mathbf{x}})]^2 + [\\nabla\\hat{\\phi}_k({\\mathbf{x}})]^2}{2}$ yields: $$\\begin{split}\n{| V,B,\\alpha \\rangle }={\\mathrm{tr}}\\bigg[\\hat{B} \\mathcal{T} \\exp\\Big(-&\\int_{-T/2}^{T/2} \\!\\!\\!{\\mathrm{d}}\\tau \\!\\int_S \\!{\\mathrm{d}}{\\mathbf{x}}\\; \\mathcal{H}({\\mathbf{x}})\\\\\n-& \\alpha[\\hat{\\phi}({\\mathbf{x}})]\\,\\psi^\\dagger(\\tau,{\\mathbf{x}}) \\Big)\\bigg]{| 0 \\rangle }.", "\n\\end{split}$$ This is a straightforward extension of the cMPS definition [@verstraete2010] (recalled in \\[subsec:recovering\\_cmps\\]) with $\\hat{Q}\\sim -\\mathcal{H}({\\mathbf{x}})$ and $\\hat{R}\\sim \\alpha[\\hat{\\phi}({\\mathbf{x}})]$.\n\n### N-particle wave function\n\nThe N-particle wave-function $\\varphi_n$ defined in can also be computed in the operator representation. ", "For $-T/2< \\tau_1<\\cdots < \\tau_n <T/2$, we get, expanding the $\\tau$-ordered exponential into an infinite product: $$\\label{eq:wave-operator}\n \\varphi_n= {\\mathrm{tr}}\\left[\\hat{B}\\; \\hat{G}_{T,\\tau_n}\\, \\hat{\\alpha}(x_n) \\, \\hat{G}_{\\tau_n,\\tau_{n-1}} \\, \\hat{\\alpha}(x_{n-1}) \\cdots \\hat{\\alpha}(x_1)\\, \\hat{G}_{\\tau_1,0} \\right]$$ with $\\hat{\\alpha}(x_n) = \\alpha[\\hat{\\phi}({\\mathbf{x}}_n)]$, $\\hat{G}_{u,v} = \\mathcal{T}\\exp[-\\int_v^u {\\mathrm{d}}\\tau \\!\\int_S {\\mathrm{d}}{\\mathbf{x}}\\mathcal{H}({\\mathbf{x}})]$. As for cMPS [@verstraete2010], we may interpret $\\hat{G}$ as a propagator and $\\hat{\\alpha}$ as a scattering matrix creating a particle.", "\n\nNote that amounts to taking as wave function a correlation function of auxiliary quantum fields. ", "This is similar in spirit with the Moore-Read states [@moore1991] used for Hall physics or with the infinite matrix product states [@cirac2009] used for critical spin chains.", "\n\n### Correlation functions\n\nFinally, we may provide an expression for the generating functionals $\\mathcal{Z}_{j',j}$ $\\widetilde{\\mathcal{Z}}_{j',j}$ in the operator representation. ", "Exploiting the operator definition of the cTNS , expanding the $\\tau$-ordered exponential into an infinite product of infinitesimal exponentials, we get: $$\\label{eq:operator-antiordered}\n \\widetilde{\\mathcal{Z}}_{j',j} = {\\mathrm{tr}}\\left[B\\otimes B^* \\, \\mathcal{T}\\exp\\left(\\int_{-T/2}^{T/2} \\mathds{T}_{j'j}\\right)\\right]$$ with the *transfer matrix* (with sources): $$\\mathds{T}_{j'j} = \\int_S -\\mathcal{H}\\otimes \\mathds{1} -\\mathds{1}\\otimes \\mathcal{H}^* + (\\alpha[\\hat{\\phi}] + j') \\otimes (\\alpha[\\hat{\\phi}]^* + j)$$ Using as before the BCH formula yields: $$\\label{eq:operator-ordered}\n \\mathcal{Z}_{j'j} = {\\mathrm{tr}}\\left[B\\otimes B^* \\mathcal{T}\\exp\\left\\{\\int_{-T/2}^{T/2} \\left(\\mathds{T}_{j'j} - \\int_{S} j\\cdot j'\\right)\\right\\}\\right]$$ The functional derivatives can then be carried explicitly and one obtains [*e.g.* ]{}, for $-T/2<\\tau_2 <\\tau_1<T/2$: $$\\begin{split}\n \\langle \\psi^\\dagger(x_1) \\psi(x_2)\\rangle = {\\mathrm{tr}}&\\big\\{B\\otimes B^* \\cdot \\mathcal{M}_{T/2,\\tau_1} \\cdot [\\mathds{1} \\otimes \\hat{\\alpha}^*(x_1)] \\\\\n &\\!\\! ", "\\cdot \\mathcal{M}_{\\tau_1,\\tau_2} \\cdot [\\hat{\\alpha}(x_2)\\otimes \\mathds{1}] \\cdot \\mathcal{M}_{\\tau_2,-T/2} \\big\\}\n\\end{split}$$ with the map $\\mathcal{M}_{u,v}= \\mathcal{T}\\exp[\\int_v^u \\mathds{T}]$ and the *transfer matrix* $\\mathds{T}:=\\mathds{T}_{00}$. More generally, correlation functions are given by the trace of a succession of propagators $\\mathcal{M}$ followed by operator insertions of $\\alpha \\otimes \\mathds{1}$ (respectively $\\mathds{1}\\otimes \\alpha^*$) in the positions corresponding to $\\psi$ (respectively $\\psi^\\dagger$).", "\n\nLink with discrete tensor network states {#sec:discrete}\n========================================\n\n(Discrete) tensor network states\n--------------------------------\n\nWe start with a very brief reminder on tensor network states (TNS), recalling only their elementary definition. ", "For an understanding of their efficiency in representing quantum systems of physical interest, we direct the reader to the relevant literature ([*e.g.* ]{}[@verstraete2008; @bridgeman2017] and references therein).", "\n\nTNS are variational ansatz for many-body wave functions that take the form of a contraction of local tensors. ", "The simplest example, in spatial dimension $d=1$, is provided by matrix product states (MPS). ", "For a translation invariant quantum spin $1/2$ chain with $N$ sites, a generic state reads: $${| \\psi \\rangle } = \\sum_{i_1,\\cdots,i_n =\\{-1,1\\}^N} c_{i_1,\\cdots,i_n}\\; {| i_1 \\rangle }\\otimes\\cdots\\otimes{| i_N \\rangle }$$ where the wave function $c_{i_1,\\cdots,i_N}$ contains $2^N$ complex parameters. ", "A MPS is a economical ansatz for this wave function: $$\\label{eq:defmps}\n c_{i_1,\\cdots,i_n} = {\\mathrm{tr}}\\left[A_{i_1}\\cdots A_{i_N}\\right]$$ where $A_{-1}$ and $A_{1}$ are two $\\chi\\times\\chi$ matrices. ", "These matrices contain the parameters which allow to vary the state. ", "Their size $\\chi$, called the bond-dimension, encodes the depth of the variational class and upper bounds the amount of spatial entanglement that can be carried by the state.", "\n\nThe two matrices can be be collected into a 3-index tensor $[A_i^{k,\\ell}]^{k,\\ell=1\\cdots \\chi}_{i=\\pm 1}$ written graphically: $$A_i^{k,\\ell} =k\\; \\begin{array}[b]{c}\n i\\\\\n \\hbox{\\includegraphics[scale={0.6}]{matrix.pdf}}\n \\end{array}\\; \\ell$$ where $i$ is the physical index and $k,\\ell$ are so called bond indices. ", "Graphically, the corresponding wave function $c$ can be written: $$c_{i_1,\\cdots,i_N}=\\vcenter{\\hbox{\\includegraphics[scale={0.6}]{mps.pdf}}}$$ where joint legs of the tensor $A$ denote a summation on the corresponding index, associated with the matrix multiplication and subsequent trace in . ", "This representation makes it natural to generalize matrix product states to [@verstraete2004] in arbitrary dimensions, [*e.g.* ]{}in $d=2$ for $N\\times N$ sites: $$c_{i_1,\\cdots,i_{N^2}} = \\vcenter{\\hbox{\\includegraphics[scale={0.6}]{elem.pdf}}}$$ This latter object, in general $d$, is what the cTNS defined in or aims to extend to the continuum.", "\n\nConstructing cTNS\n-----------------\n\nOur objective is to show how cTNS can be obtained from a limit of a discrete TNS. ", "To motivate this discrete ansatz, we first provide heuristics for why its main characteristics seem to be required. ", "Mainly, we aim to justify:\n\n1. ", " why infinite bond dimension is needed, and\n\n2. ", " why the trivial tensor around which we expand is of the form we postulate.", "\n\nThe first point is a scaling argument. ", "We ask for a strong notion of continuum limit: we require the discrete tensor to be approximately stable by fine graining to the UV. ", "Namely, the discrete ansatz needs to be (at least approximately) expressible as a contraction of tensors with the same form but different parameters. ", "Each blocking multiplies the physical dimension by $2^d$, and this is why in the continuum limit one obtains a field theory on the physical degrees of freedom. ", "But each blocking also multiplies the bond dimension by $2^{d-1}$ (see Fig. ", "\\[fig:peps\\_renormalization\\]). ", "Hence, for $d>1$, the bond dimension is increased when zooming out and decreased when zooming in. ", "The only way to make the class of states considered approximately stable is for the bond dimension to be infinite. ", "Notice in this respect that the $d=1$ case allows finite bond dimensions even in the continuum limit [@verstraete2010; @haegeman2013]. ", "It will be important to see if this peculiarity can be recovered in some appropriate limit in section \\[subsec:recovering\\_cmps\\].", "\n\nNote that our argument in favor of infinite bond dimension does not imply that a discrete tensor network state with finite bond dimension could not behave, at distances sufficiently large compared to the lattice spacing, like a cTNS. ", "Rather, our argument shows that any simple space discretization of a cTNS in $d\\geq 2$ into a TNS will have infinite bond dimension, even for arbitrarily small lattice spacing. ", "As in [@jennings2015], it could also be that a proper choice of boundary conditions would constrain the tensor contraction on a finite dimensional subspace, despite an apparent infinite bond dimension.", "\n\n![**", "Tensor blocking** – In $d=1$, blocking does not increase the bond dimension. ", "In $d=2$, going from the UV to the IR doubles the bond dimension at each blocking. ", "Hence flowing the other way, from IR to UV, one reaches a trivial bond dimension after a finite number of iterations unless the initial bond dimension is infinite.[]{data-label=\"fig:peps_renormalization\"}](peps_renormalization.pdf){width=\"0.99\\columnwidth\"}\n\nWe now need to discuss more precisely the form of the elementary tensor. ", "For notational simplicity, we now assume that an elementary tensor $\\hat{T}$ to be contracted: $$\\hat{T} := \\vcenter{\\hbox{\\includegraphics[scale={0.6}]{singletensor.pdf}}}$$ is a *vector* in its bond indices but an *operator* acting on the vacuum in the physical space, namely: $$\\begin{aligned}\n{| \\text{physical state} \\rangle }&= \\text{contraction}\\left\\{\\text{network of }\\hat{T}\\right\\}\\; {| 0 \\rangle }\\\\\n&=\\vcenter{\\hbox{\\includegraphics[scale={0.6}]{elem0.pdf}}}\\,{| 0 \\rangle }\\end{aligned}$$ To obtain a continuum limit, the crucial choice lies in the elementary “trivial tensor”, acting on the vacuum, and around which to expand: $$\\hat{T}= \\hat{T}^{(0)} + \\varepsilon^d \\times \\text{corrections}.$$ Indeed, it is natural to want the tensor corresponding to zero particle in an elementary cell of the physical space to dominate. ", "It seems that any other choice would preclude the existence of a continuum limit. ", "In $d=1$ dimension, there is only one natural option which is to take the tensor corresponding to the identity: $$\\hat{T}^{(0)} = \\vcenter{\\hbox{\\includegraphics[scale={0.6}]{id.pdf}}}$$\n\nBut in the same way as for the bond dimension, the situation is a little too trivial in $d=1$ to give a precise hint for higher dimensions. ", "In $d>1$, there are several seemingly natural options which we have to inspect. ", "We will discuss the $d=2$ case but the reasoning holds for any $d\\geq 2$. We do not aim to prove that the tensor we will ultimately expand around is the only option, but rather that other seemingly simpler options bring difficulties.", "\n\n1. ", " A naive option is to generalize the identity on the auxiliary bond space by taking $\\hat{T}^{(0)}_{ijkl}=\\delta_{ijkl}$, that is to take an elementary tensor corresponding to a (GHZ) state on the bond indices: $$\\label{eq:ghz}\n \\hat{T}^{(0)}=\\vcenter{\\hbox{\\includegraphics[scale={0.6}]{ghz.pdf}}}$$ As will later be manifest, this choice is too brutal and would yield a state with a trivial spatial structure.", "\n\n2. ", " Another simple option is to take the identity along a diagonal, [*e.g.* ]{}: $$\\hat{T}^{(0)}=\\vcenter{\\hbox{\\includegraphics[scale={0.6}]{idpepsu.pdf}}}$$ This is the choice that stays the closest in spirit with the $d=1$ case. ", "The problem of such a choice (made [*e.g.* ]{}in [@jennings2015]) is that it picks a prefered a direction and thus makes Euclidean invariance impossible to obtain directly (that is, without analytic continuation).", "\n\n3. ", " We may combine the $2^{d-1}$ identity operator along diagonals in a sum, as an attempt to recover the Euclidean invariance lost with the previous choice: $$\\hat{T}^{(0)}= \\vcenter{\\hbox{\\includegraphics[scale={0.6}]{idpepsu.pdf}}} + \\vcenter{\\hbox{\\includegraphics[scale={0.6}]{idpepsv.pdf}}}$$ An issue is then that the corresponding tensor contraction contains loops: $$\\vcenter{\\hbox{\\includegraphics[scale={0.6}]{loop_configuration.pdf}}}$$ which yield divergent terms as ${\\mathrm{tr}}[\\mathds{1}]=+\\infty$ for infinite bond dimension.", "\n\nNone of the natural options seems to provide a simple Euclidean invariant continuum limit. ", "Our proposal will consist in taking a regularized version of the first possibility, in the form of a “soft” delta: $$\\hat{T}^{(0)}=\\vcenter{\\hbox{\\includegraphics[scale={0.6}]{softghz.pdf}}}~~~~.$$\n\nDiscrete Ansatz in d=2\n----------------------\n\nThe first lesson from the previous sections is that infinite bond dimensions seem to be required. ", "We thus write the bond indices of the elementary tensor as $D$ real numbers. ", "In $d=2$, this means that an elementary tensor has $4$ bond indices $\\phi(1)$, $\\phi(2)$, $\\phi(3)$, and $\\phi(4) \\in \\mathds{R}^{D}$: $$\\label{eq:discretedef}\n\\hat{T}_{\\phi(1),\\phi(2),\\phi(3),\\phi(4)}= { \\scriptsize\\begin{array}{ccc}\n \\phi(2)\\!\\!\\!\\!\\! ", " & & \\!\\! ", "\\phi(3) \\\\\n &\\vcenter{\\hbox{\\includegraphics[scale={0.6}]{singletensor0.pdf}}} & \\\\\n \\phi(1)\\!\\! ", " & & \\!\\!\\!\\!\\! ", "\\phi(4) \n\\end{array}}$$ As we mentioned before, the heart of the problem of the continuum limit lies in defining the proper trivial tensor around which to expand. ", "We choose a “soft” delta: $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\hat{T}^{(0)}&=\\vcenter{\\hbox{\\includegraphics[scale={0.6}]{softghz.pdf}}}\\nonumber \\\\\n&=\\exp\\bigg\\{\\frac{-1}{2}\\sum_{k=1}^D[\\phi_k(1)-\\phi_k(2)]^2 +\n[\\phi_k(1)-\\phi_k(4)]^2 \\nonumber\\\\\n&\\hskip1cm+[\\phi_k(3)-\\phi_k(2)]^2+[\\phi_k(3)-\\phi_k(4)]^2\\bigg\\}\\label{eq:discrete}\\end{aligned}$$ This ansatz forces the bond indices to remain close to each other, and contributes to the generation of the gradient squared term in the action. ", "Being Gaussian, we also naturally expect its form to be stable. ", "To this “trivial” part, we add local corrections of order $\\varepsilon^d=\\varepsilon^2$: $$\\label{eq:defT0}\n\\hat{T} = \\hat{T}^{(0)}\\exp\\left[-\\varepsilon^2 V(\\phi) \\,\\mathds{1} + \\varepsilon^2 \\alpha(\\phi) \\;\\psi^\\dagger(x)\\right].$$ In this expression, $\\phi$ denotes whatever combination of the bond field indices $\\phi(1)$, $\\phi(2)$, $\\phi(3)$, and $\\phi(4)$. The simplest possibility is to take $\\phi$ as the average of the bond indices but it does not matter for the continuum limit. ", "The operator $\\psi^\\dagger(x)$ anticipates the continuum and has commutation relations $[\\psi(x),\\psi^\\dagger(y)]=\\frac{1}{\\varepsilon^2} \\delta_{x,y} \\simeq \\delta^2(x-y)$.\n\nIgnoring the boundary conditions for now, the contraction of the tensors amounts to integrate over all the bond indices: $${| V,\\alpha \\rangle }=\\!\\!\\int\\!\\!\\!\\! ", "\\prod_{x\\in\\text{lattice}} \\!\\!\\!\\!\\! ", "\\hat{T}(x) \\! ", "\\prod_{k=1}^D{\\mathrm{d}}\\phi_k \\! ", "\\left(x+\\frac{\\varepsilon}{2} \\mathbf{e}_1\\right) {\\mathrm{d}}\\phi_k\\!\\left(x+\\frac{\\varepsilon}{2} \\mathbf{e}_2\\right) {| 0 \\rangle }$$ where $\\mathbf{e}_1$ and $\\mathbf{e}_2$ are unit vectors along the two lattice directions and the bond fields are indexed by the points on the links of the lattice where they sit. ", "Writing $u=\\frac{x^1+x^2}{\\sqrt{2}}$ and $v=\\frac{x^1-x^2}{\\sqrt{2}}$ we see that the differences in eq. ", "yield: $$\\begin{split}\n\\prod_{x\\in\\text{lattice}}\\!\\!\\!\\! ", " \\hat{T}(x) \\underset{\\varepsilon\\rightarrow 0}{\\simeq} \\exp\\bigg\\{-&\\int \\!{\\mathrm{d}}^2 x \\, \\frac{[\\partial_u\\phi_k(x)]^2 + [\\partial_v\\phi_k(x)]^2}{2}\\\\\n&+V[\\phi(x)] -\\alpha[\\phi(x)]\\,\\psi^\\dagger(x)\\bigg\\}.", "\n\\end{split}$$ We recognize the (rotation invariant) gradient square term of the continuum definition \\[def:pathintegral\\]. ", "Defining the path integral “measure” as: $$\\mathcal{D}\\phi :\\simeq \\lim_{\\varepsilon\\rightarrow 0} \\prod_{\\underset{k=1\\cdots D}{x\\in\\text{lattice}}}{\\mathrm{d}}\\phi_k\\left(x+\\frac{\\varepsilon}{2} \\mathbf{e}_1\\right) {\\mathrm{d}}\\phi_k\\left(x+\\frac{\\varepsilon}{2} \\mathbf{e}_2\\right)$$ finaly yields the continuous tensor network state of equation up to boundary conditions. ", "To get a state on the physical Hilbert space, the auxiliary fields on the boundary just have to be contracted (or integrated) against a boundary functional which we wrote $B$ in .", "\n\nDiscrete Ansatz in general d\n----------------------------\n\nFor $d\\geq 3$ the derivation is carried along the same way as before. ", "We just note that there is a small peculiarity in the $d=2$ case because the auxiliary fields are adimensional. ", "To generalize equation to higher spatial dimensions $d>2$, one naturally extends the prescription of summing all the differences of the squares of the nearest bond indices $\\phi(1),\\cdots \\phi(2 d)$. But, importantly, to obtain the continuum limit, one needs to multiply this expression by $\\varepsilon^{d-2}$ where $\\varepsilon$ is the length of the unit cell. ", "$$\\label{eq:d-ansatz}\n\\hat{T}^{(0)}_{\\phi(1) \\cdots \\phi(2d)} = \\exp\\left\\{-\\frac{\\varepsilon^{d-2}}{2} \\sum_{k=1}^D \\cdots\\right\\}$$ to obtain the integral of a gradient squared in the continuum limit. ", "In $d=2$, the $\\varepsilon^d$ of the integration measure and $\\varepsilon^{-2}$ from the gradient square cancel each other and this scaling factor does not appear.", "\n\nIn retrospect, it is clear why deriving the continuum limit by perturbing around the GHZ tensor would have given a trivial continuum. ", "It would have corresponded to putting an infinitely large constant instead of $\\varepsilon^{d-2}$ in , an infinite “rigidity” that could not be compensated by locally small terms.", "\n\nProperties {#sec:properties}\n==========\n\nWe now explore the properties of cTNS that are analogous to those of their discrete counterparts.", "\n\nStability and expressiveness {#subsec:expressiveness}\n----------------------------\n\nIt is first natural to wonder how “big” the class of cTNS is. ", "It could be, for example, that even for arbitrary large $D$ and arbitrary $V$, $B$ and $\\alpha$, cTNS only spanned a small sector of the Fock space. ", "As in the discrete, can any state be approximated, even if inefficiently, by a cTNS?", "\n\nLet us first consider the *stability* of the cTNS class. ", "The sum of two cTNS is still a cTNS, provided we are willing to accept singular potentials $V$. More precisely, let ${| V_1,B_1,\\alpha_1 \\rangle }$ and ${| V_2,B_2,\\alpha_2 \\rangle }$ be two cTNS with bond-field dimension $D_1$ and $D_2$. Then we can easily rewrite their sum as a cTNS with bond-field dimension $D_1+D_2+1$ (although it may in general require fewer auxiliary fields). ", "For example, defining the cTNS ${| W_\\Lambda,C,\\beta \\rangle }$ with: $$\\begin{aligned}\n W_\\Lambda (\\phi_1,\\phi_2,{\\widetilde{\\phi}})=& V_1(\\phi_1) \\, \\theta({\\widetilde{\\phi}}) + V_2(\\phi_2)\\, \\theta(-{\\widetilde{\\phi}}) \\nonumber \\\\\n &+ \\Lambda ({\\widetilde{\\phi}}-1)^2({\\widetilde{\\phi}}+1)^2, \\\\\n C(\\phi_1,\\phi_2,{\\widetilde{\\phi}}) =& B_1(\\phi_1)\\, \\theta({\\widetilde{\\phi}})+ B_2(\\phi_2)\\, \\theta(-{\\widetilde{\\phi}}),\\\\\n \\beta(\\phi_1,\\phi_2,{\\widetilde{\\phi}})=& \\alpha_1(\\phi_1)\\, \\theta({\\widetilde{\\phi}}) + \\alpha_2(\\phi_2)\\, \\theta(-{\\widetilde{\\phi}}),\\end{aligned}$$ where $\\theta$ is the Heaviside function, we indeed have ${| W_{\\infty},C,\\beta \\rangle }\\propto{| V_1,B_1,\\alpha_1 \\rangle }+{| V_2,B_2,\\alpha_2 \\rangle }$. ", "Indeed, when $\\Lambda$ is sent to infinity, the auxiliary field ${\\widetilde{\\phi}}$ becomes a “bit” taking values $\\pm 1$ digitally splitting the functional integral into two contributions $\\int \\mathcal{D} {\\widetilde{\\phi}}\\simeq \\sum_{{\\widetilde{\\phi}}\\equiv\\pm 1}$ where each term of the sum gives the two initial states.", "\n\nThe expressiveness of cTNS is then easy to assess, following the same technique as for cMPS [@jennings2015]. ", "Taking $\\alpha(x,\\phi(x))=f(x)$ and $V=a/\\text{Vol}(\\Omega)$ we obtain any field coherent state with any complex weight ${\\mathrm{e}}^{-a}{| f \\rangle }$. ", "Using the stability result, one can construct arbitrary linear combinations of such field coherent states which are dense in Fock space, hence one can get arbitrarily close to any state in the Fock space. ", "With this construction, the bond field-dimension grows at each addition of coherent states.", "\n\nActually, using larger bond field dimensions is only a convenience and, provided $V$ and $\\alpha$ are arbitrary, a cTNS can approximate any state in the Fock space with $D=1$. Let us consider a sum of coherent states ${| \\Psi \\rangle } = \\sum_{j=1}^m {\\mathrm{e}}^{-a_i} {| f_i \\rangle }$. ", "This sum can be approximated by the cTNS ${| V_\\Lambda,1,\\alpha \\rangle }$ with: $$\\begin{aligned}\nV_\\Lambda(x,\\phi(x))=& -\\Lambda\\,\\mathbf{1}_{[-1/2,m+1/2]}[\\phi(x)] \\cos(2\\pi \\phi(x)) \\nonumber\\\\\n&+\\sum_{j=1}^m a_j\\mathbf{1}_{ [j-1/2,j+1/2]}[\\phi(x)] \\label{eq:V_M}\\\\\n\\alpha(x,\\phi(x))=&\\sum_{j=1}^m\\mathbf{1}_{[j-1/2,j+1/2]} [\\phi(x)]\\, f_j(x),\\end{aligned}$$ where $\\mathbf{1}_A[x]=1$ if $x\\in A$ and $0$ otherwise. ", "Indeed, when $\\Lambda\\rightarrow + \\infty$, the auxiliary field is forced to sit on one of the $m$ minima of the potential, which each have a complex weight ${\\mathrm{e}}^{-a_j}$. To each of these $m$ possible values of the field, the term in $\\alpha$ associates a different coherent state. ", "Hence one can approximate ${| \\Psi \\rangle }$ with arbitrary precision and hence all states in the Fock space.", "\n\nAllowing larger values of $D$ remains useful if $V$ and $\\alpha$ are restricted in some way, [*e.g.* ]{}to being polynomials with a fixed degree. ", "In that case, being able to take a larger bond field dimensions $D$ substantially increases the expressiveness of a cTNS subclass. ", "Gaussian cTNS (see \\[sec:gaussianstates\\]) will provide such an illustration.", "\n\nGauge transformation {#subsec:gaugeinvariance}\n--------------------\n\n### Intuition from the discrete\n\nIn the discrete, there exists transformations one can apply on the bond indices of an elementary tensor and that leave the state invariant. ", "For example in $d=2$, the transformation (sometimes called *gauge* transformation): $$\\label{eq:gauge}\n\\vcenter{\\hbox{\\includegraphics[scale={0.6}]{singletensor.pdf}}} \\hskip0.4cm \\longrightarrow \\hskip0.4cm\n\\vcenter{\\hbox{\\includegraphics[scale={0.6}]{singletensorgauged.pdf}}}$$ where $\\vcenter{\\hbox{\\includegraphics[scale={0.6}]{gaugeu.pdf}}} = \\!\\!\\!\\vcenter{\\hbox{\\includegraphics[scale={0.6}]{idu.pdf}}}$ and $\\vcenter{\\hbox{\\includegraphics[scale={0.6}]{gaugev.pdf}}} =\\!\\!\\! ", "\\vcenter{\\hbox{\\includegraphics[scale={0.6}]{idv.pdf}}}$ gives the same contracted state up to new boundary terms (that vanish on a torus). ", "Such transformations have proved central to classify topological phases of matter with discrete tensor networks. ", "We would thus like to find an analog in the continuum.", "\n\n, the equivalent of an invertible linear transformation acting on discrete indices is a linear operator $\\mathsf{G}$ acting on functions of $D$ real variables (the auxiliary field): $$\\mathsf{G}\\cdot \\varphi (\\phi) = \\int{\\mathrm{d}}^D \\widetilde{\\phi}\\; \\mathsf{G}(\\phi,\\widetilde{\\phi}) \\,\\varphi(\\widetilde{\\phi})$$ A $\\mathsf{G}$ that is too generic will typically destroy the continuum limit when the corresponding gauge transformation is applied on the elementary tensor. ", "The main difficulty is to know what subset of operators to look at. ", "For simplicity, we restrict ourselves to the case $D=1$ from which the general case is easily deduced.", "\n\nA first option is to consider the subset of diagonal transformations. ", "Let $\\mathsf{F}$ and $\\mathsf{G}$ be two operators acting diagonally: $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\mathsf{G}\\cdot\\varphi(\\phi)=\\mathsf{g}(\\phi)\\varphi(\\phi)\\\\\n\\mathsf{F}\\cdot\\varphi(\\phi)=\\mathsf{f}(\\phi)\\varphi(\\phi)\\end{aligned}$$ Acting on an elementary discrete tensor in the same way as in with $\\mathsf{F}$ and $\\mathsf{G}$ simply changes the integration measure: $$\\label{eq:measprefactor}\n{\\mathrm{d}}\\phi(1)\\cdots{\\mathrm{d}}\\phi(4)\\rightarrow \\frac{f(\\phi(1)) g(\\phi(4))}{f(\\phi(3)) g(\\phi(2))}{\\mathrm{d}}\\phi(1)\\cdots {\\mathrm{d}}\\phi(4)$$ If this change of measure is too general, there will be no continuum limit. ", "A natural choice, preserving the continuum, is to take: $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\mathsf{f}(\\phi)&=\\exp\\left(-\\varepsilon^{d-1} \\mathfrak{f}(\\phi)\\right)\\\\\n\\mathsf{g}(\\phi)&=\\exp\\left(-\\varepsilon^{d-1} \\mathfrak{g}(\\phi)\\right)\\end{aligned}$$ In the continuum limit such a choice put in yields: $$\\mathcal{D}\\phi\\rightarrow \\mathcal{D}\\phi\\exp\\left[\\int {\\mathrm{d}}^2 x \\; \\nabla\\cdot\\left(\\begin{array}{c}\n\\mathfrak{f}(\\phi(x))\\\\\n\\mathfrak{g}(\\phi(x))\n\\end{array}\\right) \\right]$$ hence this adds a pure divergence term into the cTNS definition which can be transformed into a boundary term thanks to Stokes’ theorem. ", "This is exactly what a gauge transformation should do.", "\n\nThis very special choice of operators does not exhaust the infinitesimal transformations compatible with the existence of a continuum limit. ", "However, we conjecture that all discrete gauge transformations of the form that preserve the continuum limit ultimately give rise to pure divergence terms as well. ", "In any case, this discussion of the discrete setting is but a motivation for the introduction of (some) continuous gauge transformations of cTNS.", "\n\n![**", "Gauge transformations** – In the discrete case (left), transforming the elementary tensor as in has a non trivial result on the boundary only. ", "In the continuum (right), the transformation of the elementary tensor is equivalent to the addition of a pure divergence term for the auxiliary fields in the bulk, which can then be integrated into a boundary condition.[]{data-label=\"fig:gauge\"}](gauge.pdf){width=\"0.99\\columnwidth\"}\n\n### Continuum description\n\nThe previous inquiries motivate the following proposition which is at the same time a definition of a certain class of gauge transformations for cTNS.", "\n\nLet $\\mathscr{F}[x,\\phi(x),\\nabla\\phi(x)]$ be an arbitrary vector field in $\\Omega$. If $\\Omega$ has no boundary, the cTNS ${| V,\\alpha \\rangle }$ is left unchanged by the gauge transformation: $$\\label{eq:gaugetransform}\nV(\\phi)\\rightarrow V(\\phi) + \\nabla\\cdot \\mathscr{F}[x,\\phi(x)].$$\n\nThe proof is trivial and is just a direct application of Stokes’ theorem. ", "More generally, if $\\Omega$ has a boundary $\\partial\\Omega$, the gauge transformation adds a boundary term to the measure: $$B(\\phi) \\rightarrow B(\\phi) \\exp\\left\\{ \\oint_{\\partial\\Omega} \\!\\!{\\mathrm{d}}^{d-1}x\\, \\mathscr{F}[x,\\phi(x)] \\cdot \\mathbf{n}(x)\\right\\}.$$ where $\\mathbf{n}(x)$ is the unit vector normal to $\\partial\\Omega$ in $x$. Gauge transformations of cTNS thus have a straightforward geometric interpretation.", "\n\nTensor rescaling {#subsec:renormalization}\n----------------\n\nOur objective is now to relate different tensor network descriptions of the same state at different scales [@verstraete2004-renormalization; @vidal2007]. ", "More precisely, considering a correlation function for a state parameterized by a tensor $T(1)$ in the thermodynamic limit: $$C(x_1,\\cdots,x_n) = {\\langle T(1) |} \\mathcal{O}(x_1)\\cdots \\mathcal{O}(x_n) {| T(1) \\rangle },$$ the objective is to find a tensor $T(\\lambda)$ of new parameters such that: $$C(\\lambda x_1,\\cdots,\\lambda x_n) \\propto {\\langle T(\\lambda) |} \\mathcal{O}(x_1)\\cdots \\mathcal{O}(x_n){| T(\\lambda) \\rangle }.$$ Naturally, in the discrete, this relation is at best approximate.", "\n\nFor the cTNS of definition \\[def:pathintegral\\], we can write the flow $V(\\lambda), \\alpha(\\lambda)$ exactly, following the rather standard dimensional analysis of ordinary QFT. ", "As such, we introduce new creation and annihilation operators $\\widetilde{\\psi}^\\dagger(x)=\\lambda^{d/2} \\psi^\\dagger(x\\lambda)$ and $\\widetilde{\\psi}(x)=\\lambda^{d/2} \\psi(x\\lambda)$. They indeed verify the standard commutation relations $[\\widetilde{\\psi}(x),\\widetilde{\\psi}^\\dagger(x)]=\\delta(x-y)$. These new operators relate correlation functions at different scales: $$\\begin{aligned}\nC(\\lambda x_1,\\cdots, \\lambda x_n) :&=\\langle \\psi^\\dagger(\\lambda x_1) \\cdots \\psi(\\lambda x_n)\\rangle\\\\\n&= \\lambda^{nd/2} \\langle \\widetilde{\\psi}^\\dagger(x_1)\\cdots \\widetilde{\\psi}^\\dagger(x_n)\\rangle,\\end{aligned}$$ where the $\\lambda^{nd/2}$ factor just comes from the fact that the operators we introduced have a dimension. ", "We just have to rewrite ${| V,\\alpha \\rangle }$ as a function of the new creation and annihilation operators to relate the different scales. ", "To achieve this, we change of position variable introducing $u=x/\\lambda$. The free field measure now reads: $$\\begin{aligned}\n{\\mathrm{d}}\\mu(\\phi)&=\\mathcal{D}\\phi\\exp\\left(-\\frac{1}{2}\\int{\\mathrm{d}}^d u \\,\\lambda^{d-2} \\;\\nabla \\phi_k (u\\lambda) \\cdot \\nabla \\phi_k (\\lambda u)\\right)\\\\\n&\\propto \\mathcal{D}\\widetilde{\\phi}\\exp\\left(-\\frac{1}{2}\\int{\\mathrm{d}}^d u \\, \\;\\nabla \\widetilde{\\phi}_k (u) \\cdot \\nabla \\widetilde{\\phi}_k (u)\\right) \\\\\n&= {\\mathrm{d}}\\mu(\\widetilde{\\phi}),\\end{aligned}$$ with $\\widetilde{\\phi}(u) =\\lambda^{\\frac{d-2}{2}} \\phi(\\lambda u)$. This gives: $$\\begin{aligned}\n {| V,\\alpha \\rangle }_\\psi &=\n\\int {\\mathrm{d}}\\mu(\\widetilde{\\phi}) \\exp\\Big\\{-\\int {\\mathrm{d}}^d u \\; \\lambda^d V[\\lambda^{\\frac{2-d}{2}}\\widetilde{\\phi}(u)] \\nonumber\\\\\n &\\hskip1.5cm- \\lambda^{\\frac{d}{2}}\\alpha[\\lambda^{\\frac{2-d}{2}}\\widetilde{\\phi}(u)] \\, \\widetilde{\\psi}^\\dagger(u)\\Big\\} \\; {| 0 \\rangle } \\\\\n &={| \\lambda^d V[\\lambda^{\\frac{2-d}{2}}\\;\\cdot\\;],\\lambda^{\\frac{d}{2}}\\alpha[\\lambda^{\\frac{2-d}{2}}\\;\\cdot\\; ] \\rangle }_{\\widetilde{\\psi}}.\\end{aligned}$$ This allows to discuss the IR behavior of cTNS in terms of *relevant*, *irrelevant*, and *marginal* couplings. ", "To this end, we informally expand $V$ and $\\alpha$ in powers $p$ of the fields $\\phi$ and analyze the terms of each degree separately. ", "The corresponding coupling dimensionality is $\\Delta= d + \\frac{2-d}{2} p$ for terms in $V$ and $\\Delta=\\frac{d}{2} +\\frac{2-d}{2} p$ for $\\alpha$. Consequently:\n\n- For $d=2$, All powers of the field in $V$ and $\\alpha$ yield relevant couplings. ", "There are no irrelevant couplings.", "\n\n- For $d=3$, the powers $p=1,2,3,4,5$ of the field in $V$ yield relevant $\\Delta>0$ couplings. ", "The power $p=6$ is marginal in $V$. For $\\alpha$, the powers $p=1,2$ are relevant and $p=3$ is marginal. ", "All other powers are irrelevant.", "\n\nRelevant powers will dominate the behavior of cTNS correlation functions in the IR and actually be the only ones allowed if the cTNS description is aimed to hold at all scales in the non Gaussian case (see \\[subsec:nongaussian\\]).", "\n\nRecovering continuous matrix product states {#subsec:recovering_cmps}\n-------------------------------------------\n\nContinuous TNS should reduce to cMPS in an appropriate limit. ", "This is an important property to check to demonstrate that our ansatz is a natural extension of cMPS to $d\\geq 2$.\n\n### Compactification\n\nA cMPS of a quantum field defined on a space interval of length $T$ is parametrized by $3$ $(\\chi\\times \\chi)$ matrices $\\hat{Q},\\hat{B},\\hat{R}$ and is defined [@verstraete2010; @haegeman2013] as: $${| Q,B,R \\rangle } = {\\mathrm{tr}}\\left\\{\\hat{B}\\mathcal{T}\\exp\\left[\\int_{-T/2}^{T/2}\\!\\!\\!{\\mathrm{d}}\\tau\\, \\hat{Q} + \\hat{R}\\otimes \\psi^\\dagger(\\tau)\\right]\\right\\}{| 0 \\rangle }.$$\n\nTo obtain a cMPS, we may directly instantiate our cTNS ansatz with $d=1$, [*e.g.* ]{}using its functional integral form . ", "However, as we mentioned before, the $d=1$ case is quite peculiar compared to other dimensions and so it is nice to see it can also be immediately obtained from a general $d$ case where all dimensions but one are taken to be very small.", "\n\nIndeed, consider a domain of the form $\\Omega = [-T/2,T/2]\\times S$ where $S$ is a $d-1$ dimensional torus of length $\\ell$ in all $d-1$ directions. ", "Expanding the auxiliary fields $\\phi$ of in Fourier modes on this $d-1$ torus $S$ and taking the limit $\\ell\\rightarrow 0$, yields a functional integral in which only the field zero mode on $S$ survives. ", "Hence, one obtains a functional integral of the form: $$\\begin{split}\n {| V,B,\\alpha \\rangle } = \\int \\mathcal{D} \\phi B(\\phi)& \\exp\\bigg\\{-\\!\\int_{-T/2}^{T/2}\\!\\!\\!{\\mathrm{d}}x \\; \\frac{1}{2} \\sum_{k=1}^D [\\partial_x \\phi_k(x)]^2 \\\\\n &+ V[\\phi(x)] - \\alpha[\\phi(x)] \\, \\psi^\\dagger(x)\\bigg\\} {| 0 \\rangle },\n\\end{split}$$ where the $1$ dimensional auxiliary field $\\phi$ is the zero mode (on the shrunk torus $S$) of the initial $d$ dimensional auxiliary field. ", "It is what one would have obtained fixing immediately $d=1$ in . ", "In operator form, this yields: $$\\label{eq:particle}\n\\begin{split}\n{| V,B,\\alpha \\rangle }={\\mathrm{tr}}\\bigg[\\hat{B} \\mathcal{T} \\exp\\Big(&\\!\\!-\\!\\!\\int_{-T/2}^{T/2} \\!\\!\\!{\\mathrm{d}}\\tau \\sum_{k=1}^D\\frac{\\hat{P}_k^2}{2} \\\\\n+& V[\\hat{X}] - \\alpha[\\hat{X}]\\,\\psi^\\dagger(\\tau) \\Big)\\bigg]{| 0 \\rangle }\n\\end{split}$$ where $\\hat{P}_k$ and $\\hat{X_k}$ are canonically conjugated pairs ($D$ zero dimensional quantum fields). ", "This is already a cMPS with $-\\hat{Q} = \\sum_{k=1}^D\\frac{\\hat{P}_k^2}{2}\n+ V[\\hat{X}]$ and $\\hat{R}=\\alpha[\\hat{X}]$. However, the bond Hilbert space is now that of $D$ particles in $1$ dimension or $1$ particle in $D$ dimensions, hence $\\chi = +\\infty$.\n\n### Bond dimension quantization\n\nTo obtain a genuine cMPS (with finite bond dimension) from a $d=1$ cTNS defined by , we need to choose a specific potential effectively reducing the Hilbert space dimensionality. ", "The intuition is quite clear: take a potential with deep minima.", "\n\nLet us take a potential with $D$ deep minima $m_k$ on the vertices closest to $0$ of an hypercube, [*i.e.* ]{}$m_1=(1,0,\\cdots,0)$, $m_2=(0,1,0,\\cdots,0)$, ..., and $m_D=(0,\\cdots,0,1)$. The effective dynamics is now restricted to a $D$-dimensional Hilbert space spanned by ${| m_k \\rangle }$ corresponding to wave packets localized around each minima. ", "In this reduced Hilbert space, the minima are coupled by tunneling. ", "Because of the geometrical configuration we have considered, the minima can all be connected by independent saddle points, hence the effective coupling between the minima can be chosen freely. ", "This means that we can obtain any $D\\times D$ complex matrix $Q$ of standard cMPS by adjusting the value of the $D^2$ saddle points of $V$.\n\nThe $R$ matrix is fixed in the same way. ", "The values of $\\alpha[X]$ on the minima ${| m_k \\rangle }$ of the potential fix the diagonal coefficients of $R$ and the value on the saddle point connecting ${| m_{k_1} \\rangle }$ and ${| m_{k_2} \\rangle }$ fix the non diagonal terms $R_{k_1,k_2}$.\n\nHence, not only can cTNS reduce to cMPS when $d=1$ (or when $d-1$ dimensions are small) for a specific choice of potential, but actually all (bosonic) cMPS can be obtained this way. ", "In this context, the bond field dimension $D$ reduces to the usual bond dimension $\\chi$.\n\nComputations {#sec:computations}\n============\n\nGaussian states {#sec:gaussianstates}\n---------------\n\nThere exists a subclass of cTNS for which all quantities of interest can be computed exactly: Gaussian cTNS.", "\n\n\\[def:gaussian\\] A cTNS is said to be *Gaussian* if the functions $V$ and $\\alpha$ are respectively at most quadratic and affine in the auxiliary field: $$\\begin{aligned}\nV(x,\\phi)&=V^{(0)}(x) + V^{(1)}_k(x)\\,\\phi_k+ \\frac{1}{2}V^{(2)}_{k\\ell}(x)\\, \\phi_k \\phi_\\ell \\\\\n\\alpha(x,\\phi)&= \\alpha^{(0)}(x) + \\alpha^{(1)}_k(x)\\,\\phi_k\\end{aligned}$$\n\nNaturally, a Gaussian cTNS is also a Gaussian state in the usual sense of the term. ", "More precisely, for a Gaussian cTNS, $\\mathcal{Z}_{j',j}$ and $\\widetilde{\\mathcal{Z}}_{j',j}$ are manifestly Gaussian functionals. ", "Let us compute $\\mathcal{Z}_{j',j}$ in the translation invariant case $\\Omega=\\mathds{R}^d$.\n\nInserting definition \\[def:gaussian\\] into equation yields: $$\\begin{aligned}\n\\mathcal{Z}_{j',j}=\\frac{1}{\\mathcal{N}} \\int \\mathcal{D}[\\phi]\\mathcal{D}[\\phi'] &\\exp\\bigg\\{ -\\int {\\mathrm{d}}^{d}x \\left(\\begin{array}{c}\n\\phi\\\\\n\\phi'\n\\end{array}\\right)^T \\!\\!\\!\\cdot \n\\left(\\begin{array}{cc}\n\\frac{-\\triangle+V^{(2)}}{2} & \\frac{-\\alpha^{(1)}\\otimes \\alpha^{(1)*}}{2}\\\\\n\\frac{-\\alpha^{(1)*}\\otimes\\alpha^{(1)}}{2} & \\frac{-\\triangle+V^{(2)*}}{2} \n\\end{array}\\right) \\cdot\\left(\\begin{array}{c}\n\\phi\\\\\n\\phi'\n\\end{array}\\right)\\nonumber \\\\\n& + \\left(\\begin{array}{c}\nV^{(1)} - \\alpha^{(1)}(j+\\alpha^{(0)*}) \\\\\nV^{(1)} - \\alpha^{(1)*}(j'+ \\alpha^{(0)})\n\\end{array}\\right)^T \\!\\!\\!\\cdot\n\\left(\\begin{array}{c}\n\\phi\\\\\n\\phi'\n\\end{array}\\right) - j\\alpha^{(0)} - j' \\alpha^{(0)*} - \\alpha^{(0)} \\alpha^{(0)*}+ V^{(0)} + V^{(0)*}\\bigg\\}.\\end{aligned}$$ Carrying the Gaussian integration we then obtain: $$\\begin{split}\n\\mathcal{Z}_{j,j'}=\\frac{1}{\\widetilde{\\mathcal{N}}}\\exp\\bigg\\{\n\\int {\\mathrm{d}}^d x\\,{\\mathrm{d}}^d y \\;\\frac{1}{2} \\; \\Lambda(j,j')^T(x) \\cdot K(x,y) \\cdot \\Lambda(j,j')(y) + \n\\delta(x-y)(j\\alpha^{(0)} + j' \\alpha^{(0)*})(y)\\bigg\\}\n\\end{split}$$ where: $$\\begin{aligned}\n &\\Lambda(j,j')=\\left(\\begin{array}{c}\nV^{(1)} - \\alpha^{(1)}(j+\\alpha^{(0)*}) \\\\\nV^{(1)} - \\alpha^{(1)*}(j'+ \\alpha^{(0)})\n\\end{array}\\right)\\text{ and } \\left(\\begin{array}{cc}\n-\\triangle+V^{(2)} & -\\alpha^{(1)}\\otimes \\alpha^{(1)*}\\\\\n-\\alpha^{(1)*}\\otimes\\alpha^{(1)} & -\\triangle+V^{(2)*}\n\\end{array}\\right)K(x,y) = \\mathds{1}_{2D\\times 2D} \\delta(x-y). ", "\\label{eq:kernel}\\end{aligned}$$ Because of translation invariance, $K(x,y)=K(x-y)$ which can be written in Fourier space: $$K(x-y)=\\int {\\mathrm{d}}^{d} p \\;{\\mathrm{e}}^{ip\\cdot (x-y)} K(p).$$ Inserting this expression into equation and integrating over the variable $u=(x-y)$ yields: $$K(p)=\\frac{1}{(2\\pi)^d} \\left(\\begin{array}{cc}\np^2+V^{(2)} & -\\alpha^{(1)}\\otimes \\alpha^{(1)*}\\\\\n-\\alpha^{(1)*}\\otimes\\alpha^{(1)} & p^2+V^{(2)*}\n\\end{array}\\right)^{-1},$$ which is difficult to make more explicit but could be computed exactly for given $\\alpha$ and $V$. To get a intuition of the behavior of the two point functions, we may instantiate this expression on a simple example where the bond field-dimension $D$ equals $1$ and $\\alpha^{(0)}=V^{(1)}=0$ for simplicity. ", "In that case we have: $$K(p)=\\frac{1}{(2\\pi)^d} \\frac{1}{(p^2+V^{(2)})(p^2+V^{(2)*})- |\\alpha^{(1)}|^4} \\left(\\begin{array}{cc}\np^2+V^{(2)*} & |\\alpha^{(1)}|^2\\\\\n|\\alpha^{(1)}|^2 & p^2+V^{(2)}\n\\end{array}\\right).$$ Using this gives the correlation function: $$\\begin{aligned}\nC(x-y):=\\langle \\psi^\\dagger(x) \\psi(y)\\rangle&=\\frac{|\\alpha^{(1)}|^2}{2}\\left[ (1,0) K(x,y)(0,1)^T + (0,1) K(x,y) (1,0)^T\\right]\\\\\n&=\\frac{1}{(2\\pi)^d}\\int {\\mathrm{d}}^d p\\, \\frac{|\\alpha^{(1)}|^4 \\,{\\mathrm{e}}^{ip\\cdot (x-y)}}{(p^2+V^{(2)})(p^2+V^{(2)*})- |\\alpha^{(1)}|^4}.\\end{aligned}$$ Importantly here, the correlation function in momentum space $C(p) \\propto p^{-4}$ when $p\\rightarrow +\\infty$. Hence, the integral is not UV divergent for $x=y$ so long as $d\\leq 3$ in which case the particle density $\\langle \\psi^\\dagger(x) \\psi(x)\\rangle$ is finite.", "\n\nNon-Gaussian states {#subsec:nongaussian}\n-------------------\n\nFor a non-Gaussian cTNS, it is no longer possible to compute the correlation functions exactly in general. ", "Further, the definitions we provided for the cTNS in or are generically divergent. ", "Nonetheless one can use approximations or numerical techniques coming from the quantum field theory and tensor network toolboxes.", "\n\n### Regularization and renormalization\n\nIn the general case, the ansatz we put forward suffers from the same UV divergences that plague quantum field theories. ", "As in QFT, these divergences are in a way inevitable: the gradient squared $(\\nabla\\phi)^2$ in the path integral insufficiently penalizes high momenta in $d\\geq 1$ (note that, again, the $d=1$ case is trivial). ", "On the other hand, the locality of the underlying tensor network forbids higher derivatives. ", "Hence, as in QFT, the divergences are tied to the very property (locality) that we require.", "\n\nGiven this state of affairs, there are essentially $3$ options to deal with divergences, depending on what one needs the state for.", "\n\nThe first option is simply to regularize the state with a momentum cutoff $\\Lambda$, either directly in the path integral –which will break locality and destroy the operator representation– or in the operator representation –which will generically break Euclidean invariance–. In both cases, the scale $\\Lambda$ will be reminiscent of the inverse lattice spacing of discrete tensor networks. ", "The parameters appearing in the expansion of $V$ and $\\alpha$ will then be the equivalent of the bare parameters in QFT Lagrangians. ", "As long as the state is used as a variational ansatz [*e.g.* ]{}to minimize the energy of an anyway regularized QFT Hamiltonian, this is unproblematic. ", "Indeed, carrying an optimization on bare or renormalized parameters will be equivalent, and the fact that some properties break above a cutoff momentum is anyhow imposed by the physical QFT being approximated. ", "In this approach, there is no restriction on the powers of the auxiliary field appearing in $V$ and $\\alpha$.\n\nOne may also be interested in the class of cTNS for their properties, and not necessarily to approximate the ground state of a given system. ", "In that case, going beyond regularization and renormalizing the state with proper counterterms and renormalization conditions seems necessary to preserve the locality of the underlying tensor network. ", "In the general case, this is equivalent to renormalizing a relativistic open quantum field theory, a problem which has received interest recently [@baidya2017]. ", "At the level of dimensional analysis, this restricts powers of the auxiliary field in $V$ and $\\alpha$ to renormalizable interactions, hence to the relevant and marginally relevant powers obtained in \\[subsec:renormalization\\]. ", "In $d=3$, this restricts the parameters to a finite number of tensors appearing in the finite polynomial expansion of $V$ and $\\alpha$. Allowing for more auxiliary fields is thus necessary to make the cTNS class arbitrarily large and expressive in $d=3$.\n\nFinally, a natural regularization may be provided by restricting the class of quantum states in $d-1$ on which the transfer matrix $\\mathds{T}$ acts. ", "As we will see, for special cases of $\\mathds{T}$, one can indeed recover finite results in $d=2$. In that case, the state itself is implicitly defined by the approximate method used to contract it.", "\n\n### Dimensional reduction\n\nWe now discuss the last option. ", "To compute physical correlation functions in the general case, one can exploit their operator expression given by the exponential of a transfer matrix acting in a space of one dimension less. ", "In the $d=2$ case, the theory one needs to solve is thus simply a $1$ dimensional QFT. ", "The latter is solvable with cMPS ([*i.e.* ]{}cTNS in $1$ dimension less) which, as a bonus, have a built-in UV regulator [@haegeman2010] and bring the computation back to a $0$ dimensional problem [@osborne2010]. ", "We outline the steps of such a computation on a simple example.", "\n\nWe consider a cTNS on a torus $(\\tau,x)$, $\\tau \\in [0,T]$, $x\\in [0,L]$ (as in Fig. ", "\\[fig:operator\\]), which reads, in the operator representation: $$\\begin{split}\n{| V,\\alpha \\rangle }={\\mathrm{tr}}\\bigg[\\mathcal{T} \\exp\\Big(-&\\int_{0}^{T} \\!\\!\\!{\\mathrm{d}}\\tau \\!\\int_0^L\\! ", "\\!{\\mathrm{d}}x \\; \\mathcal{H}(x)\\\\\n-& \\alpha[\\hat{\\phi}(x)]\\,\\psi^\\dagger(\\tau,x) \\Big)\\bigg]{| 0 \\rangle }.", "\n\\end{split}$$ Correlation functions for this state at a fixed $\\tau$ take a particularly simple form, with the propagator $\\exp(\\tau \\mathds{T})$ appearing only once. ", "For example, the 2-point function reads: $$\\begin{split}\n \\langle \\psi^\\dagger(\\tau,x_1) \\psi(\\tau,x_2)\\rangle = {\\mathrm{tr}}\\left[\\mathds{1} \\otimes \\hat{\\alpha}^*(x_1) \\cdot \\hat{\\alpha}(x_2)\\otimes \\mathds{1} \\cdot {\\mathrm{e}}^{T \\mathds{T}} \\right].", "\n\\end{split}$$ Such $N$-point functions at equal $\\tau$ contain useful information about the state in the thermodynamic limit $T \\rightarrow +\\infty$, $L\\rightarrow + \\infty$. Indeed, because of Euclidean invariance, they give access to all correlation functions of aligned points, and a fortiori to all possible $2$-point functions. ", "This is sufficient to compute the expectation values of most homogeneous and isotropic quasi-local Hamiltonians.", "\n\nTo simplify the discussion, we now consider the special case of an Hermitian $\\mathds{T}$ (obtained [*e.g.* ]{}when all the coefficients of $V$ and $\\alpha$ are real). ", "In the $T\\rightarrow +\\infty$ limit, $\\exp(T \\mathds{T})$ will be dominated by the projector on the eigenvector ${| \\mathrm{ss} \\rangle }$ of $\\mathds{T}$ with the largest eigenvalue. ", "The correlation functions then simplify, [*e.g.* ]{}: $$\\label{eq:physical_stationary}\n\\begin{split}\n \\langle \\psi^\\dagger(\\tau,x_1) \\psi(\\tau,x_2)\\rangle\\propto {\\langle \\mathrm{ss} |}\\mathds{1} \\otimes \\hat{\\alpha}^*(x_1) \\cdot \\hat{\\alpha}(x_2)\\otimes \\mathds{1} {| \\mathrm{ss} \\rangle }.", "\n\\end{split}$$ The right hand side is the correlation function for ($2D$ copies of) a $1$ dimensional bosonic field theory, which motivates the use of a cMPS. ", "More precisely, we may use a cMPS defined on two copies of the auxiliary quantum fields to approximate the dominant eigenvector ${| \\mathrm{ss} \\rangle }$. ", "Assuming only $D=1$ auxiliary field, we can write: $$\\begin{split}\n {| {Q,R_1,R_2} \\rangle }=&{\\mathrm{tr}}\\bigg[\\mathcal{P}_x\\exp \\Big\\{\\int_0^L \\!\\!{\\mathrm{d}}x \\, Q\\otimes \\mathds{1} \\\\\n &+ R_1 \\otimes \\psi^\\dagger_1(x) + R_2 \\otimes \\psi^\\dagger_2(x)\\Big\\} \\bigg] {| 0 \\rangle }\n\\end{split}$$ where $Q$, $R_1$, and $R_2$ are $(\\chi \\times \\chi)$ matrices and $\\psi^\\dagger_1=\\psi^\\dagger_{[d-1]}\\otimes \\mathds{1}$ and $\\psi^\\dagger_2=\\mathds{1}\\otimes \\psi^\\dagger_{[d-1]}$ are the creation operators associated to each copy of the Fock space on which $\\mathds{T}$ acts, ${| 0 \\rangle }$ is the Fock vacuum of these two copies, and the trace is taken over the matrices. ", "This is nothing but a translation invariant cMPS for two species of bosons. ", "The dominant eigenvector can then be approximated by choosing $$\\label{eq:argmax}\n Q, R_1, R_2 = \\operatorname*{argmax}_{Q,R_1,R_2} \\frac{{\\langle Q,R_1,R_2 |}\\mathds{T}{| Q,R_1,R_2 \\rangle }}{\\langle Q,R_1,R_2|Q,R_1,R_2\\rangle}.$$ The right hand side of can be computed explicitly as a function of $Q,R_1,R_2$. Indeed, in the same way as we computed the normal ordered correlation functions for a cTNS in , one can compute the normal ordered correlation functions for a cMPS, replacing $-\\mathcal{H}(x)$ by $Q$ and $\\alpha(x)$ by $R_1, R_2$ [@haegeman2013], [*e.g.* ]{}for $x\\geq y$: $$\\langle \\psi^\\dagger_1 (x) \\psi_1(y) \\rangle= {\\mathrm{tr}}\\left[{\\mathrm{e}}^{(L-x){\\mathsf{T}}} (\\mathds{1}\\otimes R_1^*)e^{(x-y){\\mathsf{T}}} (R_1\\otimes\\mathds{1}) {\\mathrm{e}}^{y {\\mathsf{T}}}\\right]$$ with the ($0$-dimensional) transfer matrix: $${\\mathsf{T}}= Q\\otimes \\mathds{1} + \\mathds{1}\\otimes Q^* + R_1 \\otimes R_1^* + R_2\\otimes R_2^*.$$ One then just has to express $\\mathds{T}$ as a function of $\\psi_1$ and $\\psi_2$ instead of the field and conjugate momenta, which requires a choice, [*e.g.* ]{}: $$\\begin{aligned}\n \\hat{\\phi}(x)&=\\Lambda_0^{-1/2}\\frac{\\psi_{[d-1]}(x)+\\psi_{[d-1]}^\\dagger(x)}{\\sqrt{2}},\\\\\n \\hat{\\pi}(x) &=\\Lambda_0^{1/2}\\;\\, \\frac{\\psi_{[d-1]}(x)-\\psi_{[d-1]}^\\dagger(x)}{\\sqrt{2}i},\\end{aligned}$$ for some $\\Lambda_0$. Taking the expectation value of products of local operators on the cMPS yields divergent contributions. ", "They can be removed [*e.g.* ]{}by normal ordering $\\mathcal{H}$ and $\\alpha$ [^1] in the operator representation of , or by adding a counter term in the Hamiltonian as in [@stojevic2015]. ", "In the end, the expectation value to maximize can be written: $$\\frac{{\\langle Q,R_1,R_2 |}\\mathds{T}{| Q,R_1,R_2 \\rangle }}{\\langle Q,R_1,R_2|Q,R_1,R_2\\rangle} = \\frac{{\\mathrm{tr}}\\left[M(Q,R_1,R_2) {\\mathrm{e}}^{L {\\mathsf{T}}}\\right]}{{\\mathrm{tr}}\\left[ {\\mathrm{e}}^{L {\\mathsf{T}}}\\right]},$$ where $M(Q,R_1,R_2)$ is some polynomial of $Q$, $R_1$, and $R_2$ explicitly calculable from $V$ and $\\alpha$. This expression can be simplified in the thermodynamic limit and then be maximized [*e.g.* ]{}by gradient ascent [@haegeman2013]. ", "In practice, for transfer matrices with relativistic $\\mathcal{H}$ like the ones we consider, this maximization has to be carried over matrices $Q,R_1,R_2$ with a fixed maximum norm (or with a soft penalization of large norms). ", "This is necessary to prevent the cMPS and its finite entanglement from capturing only the UV features of the stationary state [@haegeman2010]. ", "For sufficiently large bond dimension $\\chi$, and taking into account this subtlety, we expect to get a good estimate of the stationary state. ", "Once $Q$, $R_1$, and $R_2$ are fixed this way, physical correlation functions can be computed analytically using equation . ", "For example, if $\\alpha$ is linear $\\alpha(\\phi) \\propto \\phi$ we get, for $x\\geq y$: $$\\begin{split}\n \\langle \\psi^\\dagger(\\tau,x) \\psi(\\tau,y)\\rangle\\propto {\\mathrm{tr}}& \\Big[{\\mathrm{e}}^{(L-x+y){\\mathsf{T}}} (R_2\\otimes \\mathds{1} + \\mathds{1} \\otimes R_2^*)\\\\\n &\\times {\\mathrm{e}}^{(x-y){\\mathsf{T}}} (R_1\\otimes\\mathds{1} + \\mathds{1}\\otimes R_1^*) \\Big].", "\n \\end{split}$$ More complicated cases could be treated in a similar way. ", "Through $2$ successive dimensional reduction, we can thus compute certain correlation functions of a cTNS in $d=2$ with an expression involving only matrices with a finite number of entries ($d=0$). ", "There is a priori no objection in principle to contract a $d=3$ cTNS this way, but each additional dimensional reduction is done at the price of a variational optimization. ", "For numerical purposes, the optimization of the cMPS is the crucial step. ", "While current methods [@haegeman2010; @stojevic2015; @draxler2017; @ganahl2018] can be used, the prospect to use cMPS to solve field theories in more than 1 spatial dimension provides a strong additional motivation to make them more efficient.", "\n\n### Perturbation theory\n\nGiven that it is possible to compute correlation functions for Gaussian cTNS, it is natural to compute correlation functions for more general states by carrying a perturbative expansion around Gaussian states. ", "One simply Dyson expands the non-Gaussian part of the exponential in the expression for the generating functional . ", "It generically yields an expansion in terms of Feynman diagrams, similar to that of QFT.", "\n\nFor example, if $\\alpha[\\phi]$ is linear in $\\phi$ with a correction $\\propto \\lambda_{k\\ell} \\phi_k \\phi_\\ell$, the expansion will contain diagrams composed of vertices with $3$ and $4$ legs, corresponding to the $\\alpha[\\phi] \\alpha^*[\\phi']$ term in , connected by Gaussian propagators. ", "As previously mentioned, unless cancellations between different auxiliary fields occur, loop diagrams will be UV divergent and a regularization will be needed. ", "We leave the derivation of the general Feynman rules, including a renormalization scheme, to future work. ", "Notice that, in this approach, it is not the state itself that is defined through a perturbative expansion, but rather the correlation functions computed with it.", "\n\n### Others\n\nThere are of course many other ways one could compute correlation functions. ", "As we mentioned before, one could rediscretize the cTNS to go back to a tensor network description, truncate the bond dimension, and use existing algorithms to contract it. ", "However this would seem to partially defeat the purpose of introducing the continuum in the first place. ", "An interesting avenue is to explore known approximations or tools of quantum field theory (besides perturbation theory) that would not be obvious in the discrete, like saddle point approximations, large $D$ limits, or functional renormalization. ", "Finally, direct Monte-Carlo sampling of the auxiliary field, although it will yield oscillating terms harming convergence in the general case, is a last resort option.", "\n\nGeneralizations {#sec:generalizations}\n===============\n\nGeneral metric and anisotropy\n-----------------------------\n\nThe main difficulty to overcome in order to construct cTNS lay in preserving local Euclidean symmetries. ", "We may now wish to relax this constraint by allowing a general metric and anisotropic terms in the functional integral definition . ", "Namely, it is natural to consider the following generalization.", "\n\n\\[def:generalpathintegral\\] A continuous tensor network state (cTNS) of a bosonic quantum field on a smooth Riemanian manifold $\\mathcal{M}$ with boundary $\\partial \\mathcal{M}$ and metric $g$, is a state ${| V,B,\\alpha \\rangle }$ parameterized by 2 functions $V$ and $\\alpha$: $\\mathds{R}^{D+dD}\\rightarrow \\mathds{C}$, and a boundary functional $B$: $L^2(\\partial M) \\rightarrow \\mathds{C}$ defined by the functional integral on an auxiliary $D$-component field $\\phi$: $$\\label{eq:generalpathintegral}\n\\begin{split}\n &{| V,B,\\alpha \\rangle } = \\int \\mathcal{D} \\phi \\, B(\\phi|_{\\partial \\mathcal{M}}) \\exp\\bigg\\{\\!\\!-\\!\\!\\int_\\mathcal{M} {\\mathrm{d}}^d x \\sqrt{g} \\\\\n &\\times\\Big(\\frac{g^{\\mu\\nu}\\partial_\\mu \\phi_k\\partial_\\nu \\phi_k}{2} \n + V[\\phi,\\nabla\\phi]- \\alpha[\\phi,\\nabla\\phi] \\, \\psi^\\dagger\\Big)\\bigg\\} \\; {| 0 \\rangle },\n\\end{split}$$ where all functions depend explicitly on position and summation on $k$ is assumed.", "\n\nSpecialization: cMERA {#subsec:cmera}\n---------------------\n\nA natural specialization of the previous generalization consists in having an auxiliary field living on an hyperbolic manifold $\\mathcal{M}$ coupled to a physical field restricted to the boundary $\\partial \\mathcal{M}$ (see Fig. ", "\\[fig:cmera\\]). ", "Namely, we have in mind a state of the form: $$\\label{eq:cmera}\n\\begin{split}\n {| V,\\alpha \\rangle }\\sim\\!\\int\\! ", "\\mathcal{D}\\phi\\, &\\exp\\bigg\\{\\!\\!-\\!\\!\\int_\\mathcal{M}\\!\\!\\! ", "\\sqrt{g} \n \\Big(\\frac{g^{\\mu\\nu}\\partial_\\mu \\phi_k\\partial_\\nu \\phi_k}{2} \n + V[\\phi]\\Big)\\bigg\\} \\\\ \\times &\\exp\\bigg\\{\\oint_{\\partial\\mathcal{M}}\\!\\!\\! ", "\\alpha[\\phi]\\,\\psi^\\dagger\\bigg\\}\\; {| 0 \\rangle }\n\\end{split}$$ where the integral on the boundary may have to be taken as some appropriately rescaled limit of a bulk integral. ", "Such states could provide a natural generalization of the multi-scale entanglement renormalization ansatz (MERA) [@vidal2008] in the continuum and for an arbitrary number of physical dimensions. ", "They could provide a natural continuum versions of tensor network toy models of the AdS/CFT correspondence [@swingle2012; @pastawski2015; @hayden2016]. ", "The form is also reminiscent of field theory toy models of the AdS/CFT correspondence [@penedones2015], where scalar field theories on a fixed AdS background are related to conformal field theories on the boundary.", "\n\n![**", "Physical states on a boundary** – In the discrete (left), the MERA is a (special case of) tensor network state with a hierarchical structure, with physical indices only at the boundary. ", "Tensor network states with such a structure can also be extended to the continuum with our cTNS ansatz, by restricting the physical field to the boundary and choosing an appropriate metric (here hyperbolic) for the bulk auxiliary fields.[]{data-label=\"fig:cmera\"}](mera_cmera.pdf){width=\"0.99\\columnwidth\"}\n\nNote that this is approach is different in spirit from that of the standard entanglement renormalization approach to quantum fields [@haegeman2013-cmera; @nozaki2012; @mollabashi2014; @cotler2018-short; @cotler2018-long], constructed as a unitary transformation applied on a QFT ground state. ", "In the proposal , there is a straightforward lattice discretization and a natural “bulk” description in terms of auxiliary fields. ", "However, the isometry property, characteristic of the MERA, is less straightforward to implement.", "\n\nFermions\n--------\n\nWe have defined our ansatz for bosonic quantum fields, because functional integrals and field coherent states are more natural in this context. ", "To extend our proposal to fermions, one would have to introduce quite peculiar Grassmanian integrals with even kinetic and potential $V$ terms but a Grassman odd term $\\alpha$ in front of the creation operator $\\psi^\\dagger$. For fermions, it may be more convenient to start with an operator representation like that of , where Euclidean invariance is less natural, to subsequently derive the functional integral formulation.", "\n\nConformal field theory\n----------------------\n\nWe defined cTNS with the help of $D$ auxiliary free massless scalar fields of measure ${\\mathrm{d}}\\mu$. A natural generalization would be to consider more general conformal field theories (CFT) for the auxiliary space, in the spirit of what has been proposed in the context of matrix product states with infinite bond dimensions [@cirac2009]. ", "Admittedly, some non-trivial measures can already effectively be emulated by tuning the real part of the potential $V$ in . ", "However in the general case, it may be more convenient to use the CFT machinery directly, for example on the wave function representation (\\[eq:wave-path\\],\\[eq:wave-operator\\]) or on correlation functions.", "\n\nDiscussion\n==========\n\nWe have put forward a new class of states for quantum fields that is obtained as a continuum limit of tensor network states and thus carries the same fundamental properties.", "\n\nAlthough we have shown a number of interesting properties of our class of states, many interesting questions are so far open. ", "Is it possible to find a quasi local parent Hamiltonian for such states? ", "Can the transfer matrix $\\mathds{T}$ used to compute correlation functions in the operator representation be put in canonical form? ", "Are there important our discussion in \\[subsec:gaugeinvariance\\] ignores? ", "Can this approach be combined with techniques developed on the lattice to study Gauge theories with tensor networks [@rico2014; @tagliacozzo2014; @haegeman2015; @zohar2015]? ", "Are there non-trivial non-Gaussian cTNS for which correlation functions can be computed exactly? ", "Do (possibly regularized) cTNS generically obey the area law like their discrete counterparts? ", "To what extent does the bond field dimension $D$ quantify entanglement for (possibly only some) classes of cTNS?", "\n\nWe are grateful to Denis Bernard, Adrián Franco-Rubio, Giacomo Giudice, Anne Nielsen, German Sierra, Guifré Vidal, and Erez Zohar for helpful discussions. ", "We thank two anonymous referees for valuable suggestions and comments. ", "AT was supported by the Alexander von Humboldt foundation and the Agence Nationale de la Recherche (ANR) contract ANR-14-CE25-0003-01.", "\n\n[^1]: While normal ordering $\\mathcal{H}$ just amounts to a change of normalization in the functional integral, normal ordering $\\alpha$ requires explicit counter terms.", "\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "ArXiv" }

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[ "Leeds man cleared of killing his girlfriend\n\nTony Gardner\n\nA man accused of killing his partner with a single punch at their home in Leeds has been found not guilty of manslaughter.", "\n\nLeslie Watson, 48, was cleared by a jury after a week-long trial at Leeds Crown Court. ", "During the trial, the court heard a recording of a 999 call for help made by Mr Watson’s partner Tammy Dodgson after it was claimed she was struck a fatal punch.", "\n\nMiss Dodgson died 16 days after emergency services were called to their home on Ascot Terrace, East End Park.", "\n\nThe prosecution claimed Watson struck his partner of six years a single blow.", "\n\nMiss Dodgson, 34, dialled 999 and complained of severe head pains around an hour after police had been to their home to arrest Mr Watson. ", "The jury heard a recording of the emergency call in which she said: “I have been assaulted by my partner. ", "He has punched me in the head and I have got severe head pains.” ", "She added: “He knocked me out. ", "He’s been locked up now. ", "He’s in the police station.”", "\n\nMiss Dodgson was taken to Leeds General Infirmary where her condition worsened. ", "She collapsed and never regained consciousness.", "\n\nProsecutor Simon Waley said Miss Dodgson suffered bleeding to the brain and died on September 27 last year.", "\n\nOpening the case, Mr Waley said: “The prosecution case is that this injury which was caused was inflicted by one punch which the defendant delivered.” ", "He added: “Tammy Dodgson and this defendant had been partners for about six years by the time of these events. ", "You will hear that they were both registered alcoholics and their relationship was frequently, it would seem, a turbulent one, particularly when they were in drink.” ", "Mr Watson denied punching Miss Dodgson. ", "The jury of seven woman and five men reached the not guilty verdict after four hours and 20 minutes of deliberation." ]

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[ "Havana, March 4 (RHC)-- Carlos Fernández de Cossío, the director of the United States Desk at the Ministry of Foreign Affairs of Cuba, has expressed his rejection of the US State Department decision to permanently reduce the staff of its embassy in Havana.", "\n\nHe said that Washington's decision \"responds to political motivations and has nothing to do with the security of its officials in Havana.\"", "\n\nWriting on Twitter, the official recalled that the absence of diplomatic staff in its Embassy in Havana “particularly affects consular services, prompting thousands of people to incur in additional expenses, as they have to travel to third countries to search for visas.\"", "\n\nHe insisted that \"it is false that diplomatic staff of the Embassy is or has been at risk. ", "It is false that any deliberate action against diplomats of the United States has been allowed in Cuba or that may have occurred in Cuba on the part of somebody. \"", "\n\nThe U.S. State Department decision to make staff cuts at its embassy in Havana permanent was announced on Friday." ]

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[ "The present invention relates to a solid state image sensing apparatus and a method for driving the apparatus, more particularly to a solid state image sensing apparatus for use by an electronic still camera and a method for driving the apparatus incorporated in the camera. ", "The invention further relates to cameras such as electronic still cameras comprising a solid state image sensing apparatus each.", "\nAlong with the development in recent years of CCD (charge coupled devices) for image sensing and other solid state image sensing apparatuses has come widespread use of electronic still cameras. ", "These cameras record images digitally using CCD-equipped solid state image sensing apparatuses as their image sensors.", "\nTo achieve high levels of resolution, electronic still cameras usually employ a so-called all-pixel read-out type CCD-equipped solid state image sensing apparatus. ", "In operation, signal charges of the pixels represented by each vertical CCD column are read out independently of one another at the same time, as shown in FIG. ", "9. ", "Given the same number of pixels, the all-pixel read-out type CCD-equipped solid state image sensing apparatus doubles the vertical resolution of the so-called field read-out type solid state image sensing apparatus used generally by video cameras.", "\nThere has recently been a demand for reducing power dissipation of these electronic still cameras so that they may be operated for an extended period of time. ", "One way of achieving that target is to reduce power dissipation by the solid state image sensing apparatus of the electronic still camera, especially by a solid state image sensing device constituting the solid state image sensing apparatus and by a signal processing circuit for processing signals from these components.", "\nPower consumption of a solid state image sensing device depends significantly on their driving frequency. ", "This signifies that lowering the driving frequency of the solid state image sensing device effectively reduces the amount of power consumed thereby. ", "Since the driving frequency is also used as the frequency of the signal processing circuit, reductions in the driving frequency are expected to reduce the amount of power dissipation by the signal processing circuit as well.", "\nThere is a disadvantage in lowering the driving frequency of the solid state image sensing device: it also lowers their frame rate. ", "A lowered frame rate reduces the amount of output signals (i.e., number of pictures) output by the solid state image sensing device per unit time. ", "This translates into awkward and unnatural motions of pictures shown on a display unit (typically an LCD) of the electronic still camera for the purpose of verifying the composition of a subject. ", "Another disadvantage is increased vulnerability of the solid state image sensing device to adverse effects of dark currents and smears." ]

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[ "Skinning the goat and pulling the load: transactional sex among youth in Dar es Salaam, Tanzania.", "\nTransactional sex has been associated with risk of HIV infection in a number of studies throughout sub-Saharan Africa. ", "Urban young women are economically vulnerable and at heightened risk of HIV infection in Tanzania; yet there are few studies that have explored relationship dynamics, including transactional sex, in this setting. ", "This paper sheds light on the broader context of sexual relationships among youth at risk for HIV, how transactional sex plays out in these relationships, and how the transactional nature of relationships affects women's risk for HIV. ", "We conducted 60 in depth interviews and 14 focus group discussions with young men and women, 16-24 years old, in Dar es Salaam, Tanzania. ", "These data guided the development of a community based HIV and violence prevention intervention for young men. ", "Youth described the exchange of sex for money or other material goods in all types of sexual relationships. ", "While the exchange was explicit in casual relationships, young women voiced material and monetary expectations from their committed partners as well. ", "Young men described their pursuit of multiple partners as sexually motivated, while women sought multiple partners for economic reasons. ", "Young men were aware of the expectations of material support from partners, and acknowledged that their ability to provide for a partner affected both the longevity and exclusivity of their relationships. ", "Youth described a deep mistrust of the motivations and commitment of their sexual partners. ", "Furthermore, young women's financial dependence on men impacted their ability to negotiate safe sexual behaviors in both casual and committed relationships. ", "Programs designed to reduce HIV risk among Tanzanian youth need to take into account the transactional component of sexual relationships and how such exchanges differ according to partner type." ]

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[ "Basically all those childish columns about Dr Gillian McKeith PhD are just a cover, so that every few months I can lay some viciously complicated maths on you, as background to a major news issue. ", "This week, after a major government report, we heard that one murder a week is committed by someone with psychiatric problems. ", "Psychiatrists should do better, the newspapers told us, and prevent more of these murders.", "\n\nIt's great to want to reduce psychiatric violence. ", "It's great to have a public debate about the ethics of preventive detention (for psychiatric patients and other potential risk groups, perhaps). ", "Before you career off and have that vital conversation, you need to understand the maths of predicting very rare events.", "\n\nLet's take the very concrete example of the HIV test. ", "The figures here are ballpark, for illustration only. ", "So: what do we measure about a test? ", "Statisticians would say the HIV blood test has a very high \"sensitivity\" of 0.999. ", "That means that if you do have the virus, there is a 99.9% chance that the blood test will be positive. ", "Statisticians would also say the test has a high \"specificity\" of 0.9999 - so if a man is not infected, there is a 99.99% chance that the test will be negative. ", "What a smashing blood test.", "\n\nBut if you look at it from the perspective of the person being tested, the maths gets slightly counterintuitive. ", "Because weirdly, the meaning, the predictive value, of a positive or negative test that an individual gets, is changed in different situations, depending on the background rarity of the event that the test is trying to detect. ", "The rarer the event in your population, the worse the very same test becomes.", "\n\nLet's say the HIV infection rate amongst high risk men in a particular area is 1.5%. ", "We use our excellent blood test on 10,000 of these men and we can expect 151 positive blood results overall: 150 will be our truly HIV positive men, who will get true positive blood tests; and one will be the one false positive we could expect, from having 10,000 HIV negative men being tested with a test that is wrong one time in 10,000. ", "So, if you get a positive HIV blood test result, in these circumstances your chances of being truly HIV positive are 150 out of 151. ", "It's a highly predictive test.", "\n\nBut now let's use the same test where the background HIV infection rate in the population is about one in 10,000. ", "If we test 10,000 people, we can expect two positive blood results overall. ", "One from the person who really is HIV positive; and then one false positive that we could expect, again, from having 10,000 HIV negative men being tested with a test that is wrong one time in 10,000.", "\n\nSuddenly, when the background rate of an event is rare, even our previously brilliant blood test becomes a bit rubbish. ", "For the two men with a positive HIV blood test result, in this population where one in 10,000 have HIV it's only 50:50 odds on whether you really are HIV positive.", "\n\nNow let's look at violence. ", "The best predictive tool for psychiatric violence has a \"sensitivity\" of 0.75, and a \"specificity\" of 0.75. ", "Accuracy is tougher, predicting an event in humans, with human minds, and changing human lives. ", "Let's say 5% of patients seen by a community mental health team will be involved in a violent event in a year. ", "Using the same maths as we did for the HIV tests, your \"0.75\" predictive tool would be wrong 86 times out of 100. ", "For serious violence, occurring at 1% a year, with our best \"0.75\" tool, you inaccurately finger your potential perpetrator 97 times out of a hundred. ", "Will you preventively detain 97 people to prevent three events? ", "And for murder, the extremely rare crime in question, occurring at one in 10,000 a year among patients with psychosis? ", "The false positive rate is so high that the best test is almost entirely useless. ", "I'm just giving you the maths on rare events. ", "What you do with it is a matter for you." ]

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[ "Aspen’s Calm Before The Storm\n\nThe quiet days of the off-season are numbered. ", "The empty streets will soon be filled with visitors here to experience the world-renowned festivals and events that take place next month. ", "Planning a summer vacation? ", "Here are some of the not-to-be-missed events happening in June.", "\n\nAspen Fringe Festival\n\nThe Aspen Fringe Festival will be back in town June 10th. ", "The 9th annual Fringe Festival showcases the best international, as well as local, talent in the performing arts world. ", "The festival was founded on the idea that art stimulates cultural discussion and inspires people to think and act globally. ", "Proceeds benefit local art programs. ", "For tickets and more information click here.", "\n\nThe Food & Wine Classic\n\nJune 16th marks the start of the annual Aspen Food and Wine Classic. ", "Savor artisan food and wine created by the world’s best chefs and winemakers throughout the weekend while mingling with celebrities and friends in town. ", "Any foodie and/or wine connoisseur needs to attend this event at least once in their lifetime! ", "Click here for tickets and more information.", "\n\nAspen Saturday Market\n\nIf you can’t get enough of the food at the Food & Wine Classic, the Aspen Saturday Market starts June 17th (the second day of the Food & Wine Classic) and continues every Saturday throughout the summer. ", "This weekly farmers market features local produce, prepared foods, handmade crafts, and live music throughout the streets of Aspen. ", "Click here for more information.", "\n\nAspen Ideas Festival\n\nSome of the world’s top leaders and most influential figures will be arriving in Aspen June 22nd to discuss, explore, and to challenge many of the ideas that shape our society and culture. ", "For a list of speakers, event times, tickets, and more information click here.", "\n\nAspen Music Festival\n\nThe Aspen Music Festival and School continues the list of summer events from June into July. ", "Starting June 29th, recitals will take place throughout town until August 20th. ", "Be sure to check out the Benedict Music Tent- a seasonal concert hall featuring the Aspen Music School’s best musicians. ", "Each performance features a different style of classical music. ", "The Festival is known for being the country’s top classical music festival. ", "For tickets and more information click here." ]

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[ "1. ", "Field of the Invention\nThe present invention relates to a method of forming an organic semiconductor pattern and a method of manufacturing an organic thin film transistor (TFT) using the method of forming the organic semiconductor pattern. ", "More particularly, the present invention relates to a method of forming an organic semiconductor pattern to simplify a manufacturing process and a method of manufacturing an organic thin film transistor (TFT) using the method of forming the organic semiconductor pattern.", "\n2. ", "Description of the Related Art\nA flat panel display device has advantageous characteristics such as being thinner, having a lighter weight, and being of a smaller size than a cathode ray tube display device. ", "Flat panel display devices include a liquid crystal display (LCD) devices, field emission display (FED) devices, a plasma display panel (PDP) display device, and an electro-luminescence (EL) display device. ", "The flat panel display device has been developed to improve an image display quality and to increase a screen size.", "\nThe PDP display device has a simple manufacturing process and a large screen. ", "However, the PDP display device has higher power consumption than the LCD device. ", "The LCD device of an active matrix type, which has a thin film transistor (TFT), is manufactured using a semiconductor manufacturing process. ", "An electronic device such as a notebook computer, a television receiver, a mobile communication device, and similar items include an LCD device. ", "However, typically the screen size of the LCD device is small, and the power consumption of a backlight assembly of the LCD device is high. ", "In addition, an LCD device includes optical elements such as a polarizer, a prism sheet, and a diffusion plate, so that a luminance and a viewing angle of the LCD device are decreased. ", "EL display devices are divided into two categories, an inorganic EL display device and an organic light emitting display (OLED) device. ", "The inorganic EL display device includes an inorganic light emitting material. ", "The OLED device includes an organic light emitting material. ", "The EL display device is a light emissive type display device so that the response speed, luminance and viewing angle of the EL display device are greater than those of a light non-emissive type display device such as an LCD device.", "\nA flexible display device of a high image display quality has been devised for mobile electronic devices. ", "The flexible display device typically includes a display element having a low manufacturing cost, high flexibility, and high endurance. ", "The display element of the flexible display device includes an organic semiconductor material. ", "The organic semiconductor material includes polyacetylene that is a conjugate organic polymer, polyphenylenes, end-substituted thiophene oligomers, pentacent, phthalocyanine, and regioregularpoly(3-alkylthiophene)s.", "\nThe manufacturing processes used in making flexible display devices include a patterning process of the organic semiconductor material. ", "The organic semiconductor material is easily molded to have a fiber shape or a film shape. ", "The organic semiconductor material has various characteristics such as flexibility, electrical conductivity, and low manufacturing cost, so that an electric element or a photo element includes the organic semiconductor material.", "\nOrganic TFTs including the organic semiconductor material were developed in 1980s. ", "An organic TFT has substantially the same structure as a silicon TFT, except for the channel layer which includes the organic semiconductor material. ", "The organic TFT has a simpler structure and a lower manufacturing cost than a silicon TFTs. ", "A Π-conjugated organic material has been used for the channel layer of the organic TFT. ", "However, the Π-conjugated organic material has poor electrical characteristics. ", "An organic TFT using the Π-conjugated organic material is not manufactured by a mass production, and is not resistant to oxygen and moisture, thereby decreasing the lifetime of the organic TFT.", "\nThe manufacturing process used to make an organic TFT includes a polymer semiconductor process and an organic semiconductor process. ", "The polymer semiconductor process includes a high polymer as a semiconductor material. ", "The semiconductor material used in the high polymer is dissolved in a solvent, and the dissolved semiconductor material is coated on a substrate using a spin coating method. ", "The organic semiconductor process utilizes a low polymer as a semiconductor material. ", "The semiconductor material used in the low polymer process is not dissolved in a solvent. ", "The semiconductor material used in the low polymer includes a pentacene. ", "Formula 1 represents a pentacene molecule which is an aromatic hydrocarbon having five benzene rings.", "\n\nThe pentacene molecule includes a plurality of single bonds and a plurality of double bonds so that an electron mobility in each of the pentacene molecules is high. ", "However, electrons mobility between adjacent pentacene molecules through hopping so that an electron mobility out of the pentacene molecules is changed with respect to a degree of close-packing of the pentacene molecules. ", "When the pentacene molecules are deposited in a vacuum, the pentancene molecules have high field effect mobility of the electrons (Synthetic metals, 41-43, 1127 (1991)). ", "A precursor of the pentacene molecules dissolved in a solvent is coated to form the semiconductor layer. ", "However, when the semiconductor layer is formed by the dissolved pentacene molecules, the characteristics of the semiconductor layer are deteriorated, and the dissolved pentancene molecules are heated at a high temperature of about 140° C. to about 180° C.\nThe organic semiconductor material is deposited on the substrate using a shadow mask. ", "When the organic semiconductor material is deposited using a shadow mask, an etching process is unnecessary. ", "However, shadow masks are not easily prepared.", "\nFor example, the thickness of the shadow mask is small and accordingly it is not easily handled. ", "The shadow mask makes contact with the substrate during the deposition process so that the shadow mask is damaged during the deposition process, and a cleaning process is required for the shadow mask. ", "Also, the shadow mask is not suitable for a large substrate. ", "In addition, the shadow mask is expensive which, in turn, increases the manufacturing cost of the organic TFT." ]

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[ "<a href='http://github.com/angular/angular.js/edit/master/src/ng/filter/filter.js' class='improve-docs btn btn-primary'><i class=\"glyphicon glyphicon-edit\">&nbsp;</i>Improve this doc</a>\n\n\n\n<a href='http://github.com/angular/angular.js/tree/master/src/ng/filter/filter.js#L3' class='view-source pull-right btn btn-primary'>\n <i class=\"glyphicon glyphicon-zoom-in\">&nbsp;</i>View Source\n</a>\n\n\n<header class=\"api-profile-header\">\n <h1 class=\"api-profile-header-heading\">filter</h1>\n <ol class=\"api-profile-header-structure naked-list step-list\">\n \n <li>\n - filter in module <a href=\"api/ng\">ng</a>\n </li>\n </ol>\n</header>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"api-profile-description\">\n <p>Selects a subset of items from <code>array</code> and returns it as a new array.</p>\n\n</div>\n\n\n\n\n<div>\n \n\n \n <h2>Usage</h2>\n <h3>In HTML Template Binding</h3>\n \n <pre><code>{{ filter_expression | filter : expression : comparator}}</code></pre>\n \n\n <h3>In JavaScript</h3>\n <pre><code>$filter(&#39;filter&#39;)(array, expression, comparator)</code></pre>\n\n \n<section class=\"api-section\">\n <h3>Arguments</h3>\n\n<table class=\"variables-matrix input-arguments\">\n <thead>\n <tr>\n <th>Param</th>\n <th>Type</th>\n <th>Details</th>\n </tr>\n </thead>\n <tbody>\n \n <tr>\n <td>\n array\n \n \n </td>\n <td>\n <a href=\"\" class=\"label type-hint type-hint-array\">Array</a>\n </td>\n <td>\n <p>The source array.</p>\n\n \n </td>\n </tr>\n \n <tr>\n <td>\n expression\n \n \n </td>\n <td>\n <a href=\"\" class=\"label type-hint type-hint-string\">string</a><a href=\"\" class=\"label type-hint type-hint-object\">Object</a><a href=\"\" class=\"label type-hint type-hint-function\">function()</a>\n </td>\n <td>\n <p>The predicate to be used for selecting items from\n <code>array</code>.</p>\n<p> Can be one of:</p>\n<ul>\n<li><p><code>string</code>: The string is evaluated as an expression and the resulting value is used for substring match against\nthe contents of the <code>array</code>. ", "All strings or objects with string properties in <code>array</code> that contain this string\nwill be returned. ", "The predicate can be negated by prefixing the string with <code>!</code>.</p>\n</li>\n<li><p><code>Object</code>: A pattern object can be used to filter specific properties on objects contained\nby <code>array</code>. ", "For example <code>{name:&quot;M&quot;, phone:&quot;1&quot;}</code> predicate will return an array of items\nwhich have property <code>name</code> containing &quot;M&quot; and property <code>phone</code> containing &quot;1&quot;. ", "A special\nproperty name <code>$</code> can be used (as in <code>{$:&quot;text&quot;}</code>) to accept a match against any\nproperty of the object. ", "That&#39;s equivalent to the simple substring match with a <code>string</code>\nas described above.</p>\n</li>\n<li><p><code>function(value)</code>: A predicate function can be used to write arbitrary filters. ", "The function is\ncalled for each element of <code>array</code>. ", "The final result is an array of those elements that\nthe predicate returned true for.</p>\n</li>\n</ul>\n\n \n </td>\n </tr>\n \n <tr>\n <td>\n comparator\n \n \n </td>\n <td>\n <a href=\"\" class=\"label type-hint type-hint-function\">function(actual, expected)</a><a href=\"\" class=\"label type-hint type-hint-true\">true</a><a href=\"\" class=\"label type-hint type-hint-undefined\">undefined</a>\n </td>\n <td>\n <p>Comparator which is used in\n determining if the expected value (from the filter expression) and actual value (from\n the object in the array) should be considered a match.</p>\n<p> Can be one of:</p>\n<ul>\n<li><p><code>function(actual, expected)</code>:\nThe function will be given the object value and the predicate value to compare and\nshould return true if the item should be included in filtered result.</p>\n</li>\n<li><p><code>true</code>: A shorthand for <code>function(actual, expected) { return angular.equals(expected, actual)}</code>.", "\nthis is essentially strict comparison of expected and actual.</p>\n</li>\n<li><p><code>false|undefined</code>: A short hand for a function which will look for a substring match in case\ninsensitive way.</p>\n</li>\n</ul>\n\n \n </td>\n </tr>\n \n </tbody>\n</table>\n\n</section>\n \n \n\n\n \n <h2 id=\"example\">Example</h2><p>\n\n<div>\n <a ng-click=\"openPlunkr('examples/example-example51')\" class=\"btn pull-right\">\n <i class=\"glyphicon glyphicon-edit\">&nbsp;</i>\n Edit in Plunker</a>\n <div class=\"runnable-example\"\n path=\"examples/example-example51\">\n\n \n <div class=\"runnable-example-file\" \n name=\"index.html\"\n language=\"html\"\n type=\"html\">\n <pre><code>&lt;div ng-init=&quot;friends = [{name:&#39;John&#39;, phone:&#39;555-1276&#39;},&#10; {name:&#39;Mary&#39;, phone:&#39;800-BIG-MARY&#39;},&#10; {name:&#39;Mike&#39;, phone:&#39;555-4321&#39;},&#10; {name:&#39;Adam&#39;, phone:&#39;555-5678&#39;},&#10; {name:&#39;Julie&#39;, phone:&#39;555-8765&#39;},&#10; {name:&#39;Juliette&#39;, phone:&#39;555-5678&#39;}]&quot;&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&#10;&#10;Search: &lt;input ng-model=&quot;searchText&quot;&gt;&#10;&lt;table id=&quot;searchTextResults&quot;&gt;&#10; &lt;tr&gt;&lt;th&gt;Name&lt;/th&gt;&lt;th&gt;Phone&lt;/th&gt;&lt;/tr&gt;&#10; &lt;tr ng-repeat=&quot;friend in friends | filter:searchText&quot;&gt;&#10; &lt;td&gt;{{friend.name}}&lt;/td&gt;&#10; &lt;td&gt;{{friend.phone}}&lt;/td&gt;&#10; &lt;/tr&gt;&#10;&lt;/table&gt;&#10;&lt;hr&gt;&#10;Any: &lt;input ng-model=&quot;search.$&quot;&gt; &lt;br&gt;&#10;Name only &lt;input ng-model=&quot;search.name&quot;&gt;&lt;br&gt;&#10;Phone only &lt;input ng-model=&quot;search.phone&quot;&gt;&lt;br&gt;&#10;Equality &lt;input type=&quot;checkbox&quot; ng-model=&quot;strict&quot;&gt;&lt;br&gt;&#10;&lt;table id=&quot;searchObjResults&quot;&gt;&#10; &lt;tr&gt;&lt;th&gt;Name&lt;/th&gt;&lt;th&gt;Phone&lt;/th&gt;&lt;/tr&gt;&#10; &lt;tr ng-repeat=&quot;friendObj in friends | filter:search:strict&quot;&gt;&#10; &lt;td&gt;{{friendObj.name}}&lt;/td&gt;&#10; &lt;td&gt;{{friendObj.phone}}&lt;/td&gt;&#10; &lt;/tr&gt;&#10;&lt;/table&gt;</code></pre>\n </div>\n \n <div class=\"runnable-example-file\" \n name=\"protractor.js\"\n type=\"protractor\"\n language=\"js\">\n <pre><code>var expectFriendNames = function(expectedNames, key) {&#10; element.all(by.repeater(key + &#39; in friends&#39;).column(key + &#39;.name&#39;)).then(function(arr) {&#10; arr.forEach(function(wd, i) {&#10; expect(wd.getText()).toMatch(expectedNames[i]);&#10; });&#10; });&#10;};&#10;&#10;it(&#39;should search across all fields when filtering with a string&#39;, function() {&#10; var searchText = element(by.model(&#39;searchText&#39;));&#10; searchText.clear();&#10; searchText.sendKeys(&#39;m&#39;);&#10; expectFriendNames([&#39;Mary&#39;, &#39;Mike&#39;, &#39;Adam&#39;], &#39;friend&#39;);&#10;&#10; searchText.clear();&#10; searchText.sendKeys(&#39;76&#39;);&#10; expectFriendNames([&#39;John&#39;, &#39;Julie&#39;], &#39;friend&#39;);&#10;});&#10;&#10;it(&#39;should search in specific fields when filtering with a predicate object&#39;, function() {&#10; var searchAny = element(by.model(&#39;search.$&#39;));&#10; searchAny.clear();&#10; searchAny.sendKeys(&#39;i&#39;);&#10; expectFriendNames([&#39;Mary&#39;, &#39;Mike&#39;, &#39;Julie&#39;, &#39;Juliette&#39;], &#39;friendObj&#39;);&#10;});&#10;it(&#39;should use a equal comparison when comparator is true&#39;, function() {&#10; var searchName = element(by.model(&#39;search.name&#39;));&#10; var strict = element(by.model(&#39;strict&#39;));&#10; searchName.clear();&#10; searchName.sendKeys(&#39;Julie&#39;);&#10; strict.click();&#10; expectFriendNames([&#39;Julie&#39;], &#39;friendObj&#39;);&#10;});</code></pre>\n </div>\n \n\n <iframe class=\"runnable-example-frame\" src=\"examples/example-example51/index.html\" name=\"example-example51\"></iframe>\n </div>\n</div>\n\n\n</p>\n\n</div>\n\n\n" ]

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[ "\n57 F.Supp. ", "40 (1944)\nLEVEY\nv.\nWARNER BROS. ", "PICTURES, Inc.\nDistrict Court, S. D. New York.", "\nJuly 28, 1944.", "\nHarry H. Oshrin and Harry Weinberger, both of New York City, for plaintiff.", "\nR. W. Perkins, by Joseph D. Karp and Stanleigh P. Friedman, all of New York City, for defendant.", "\nBONDY, District Judge.", "\nThe plaintiff, Ethel Levey, claiming that her right of privacy has been violated by the production and exhibition of the motion picture \"Yankee Doodle Dandy\" by the defendant, Warner Bros. Pictures, Inc., brought this action under the Civil Rights Law of the State of New York, Consol. ", "Laws, c. 6, to recover damages and to enjoin the further distribution and exhibition of the picture in this state in its present form.", "\nThe action was removed to this court from the Supreme Court of this state, on the ground of diversity of citizenship of the parties.", "\nSection 51 of the Civil Rights Law of the State of New York provides that any person whose name, portrait or picture is used within the State of New York for advertising purposes or for the purposes of trade without his written consent first obtained, may maintain an equitable action against the person, firm or corporation so using his name, portrait or picture to prevent the use thereof, and may also sue to recover damages for injuries sustained by reason of such use.", "\nTo establish that her picture or portrait was used in the motion picture, the plaintiff told the story of her life. ", "She described the-atrical performances in which she took part with George M. Cohan and also the following events of her life, which she claims were featured in the picture:\nShe testified that in 1898, when she was seventeen years of age and had met with some success as an actress and singer in vaudeville, she was invited to join others in a room in a hotel in Chicago. ", "There she met George M. Cohan for the first time. ", "He was then about twenty years of age and appearing in another vaudeville with his father, mother and sister. ", "Cohan proposed to her the first time they met. ", "He gave her two songs which he had composed and which she sang the following Monday at the opening of the show in which she took a part. ", "She became Cohan's sweetheart and continued to sing songs which he composed. ", "In July, 1899, they were married and thereafter she took a leading part in the plays which he wrote and produced. ", "She also testified that it was largely through her efforts that in 1904 Sam H. Harris, a producer, was induced to finance the production and exhibition of the play \"Little Johnny Jones,\" which was one of the outstanding *41 Cohan successes. ", "In 1905 at the opening in Chicago of the musical play \"Forty-Five Minutes From Broadway,\" written by her husband Cohan, she was in a box with him and his parents and heard the popular song \"Mary\" sung by Fay Templeton, a well-known actress. ", "In December, 1906, the plaintiff and Cohan separated and in June, 1907, she obtained a divorce. ", "In the same year Cohan married a girl with whom he lived until his death November 9, 1942.", "\nAfter her divorce and until recently, the plaintiff spent most of her time abroad, where she married again in 1916.", "\nIn 1941 the defendant obtained the consent of George M. Cohan in writing, to produce and exhibit a motion picture based on his life and experiences and the right to use therein plays, songs and music written and composed by him.", "\nIn 1942, thirty-five years after the divorce, the defendant produced and exhibited in the State of New York the motion picture \"Yankee Doodle Dandy\" which was, as the plaintiff in her complaint characterizes it, \"a dramatic and fictional biographic presentation of the life of one George M. Cohan, one of the foremost and successful actors, playwrights, composers, directors and theatrical producers of the early twentieth century and for many years thereafter.\"", "\nThe picture shows the life of George M. Cohan, more or less fictional, from the time of his birth, July 4, 1878, to 1940, when the President of the United States presented the Congressional Medal of Honor to him. ", "In the picture Cohan is impersonated by James Cagney and a fictitious character \"Mary\" by Joan Leslie. ", "At the beginning it shows Mary and Cohan, when advanced in years and towards the end of the theatrical career of Cohan, as husband and wife and at a time when the picture of Mary could not have any reference to the plaintiff. ", "It does not disclose that Cohan ever was divorced and it gives the impression that Mary was the only woman he ever married. ", "In the picture, which reverts to an earlier period of Cohan's life, Mary when about seventeen years of age, stage struck and ambitious for a theatrical career, after having seen Cohan perform on the stage, goes uninvited into his dressing room. ", "He is still in his disguise of an old man with a beard. ", "They dance for one another. ", "When his disguise is removed, Mary is terrorized to discover that Cohan is a young man about twenty years of age. ", "Cohan at once becomes interested in Mary and writes songs for her. ", "Mary and Cohan meet Harris and together they succeed in obtaining financial aid for the production of \"Little Johnny Jones\" but in a manner entirely different from that in which plaintiff described, it was obtained. ", "In the picture Mary is seen in a box with Cohan and Sam Harris at the first production of \"Forty-Five Minutes From Broadway\" in New York City in 1905. ", "Fay Templeton, impersonated by Irene Manning, sings the song \"Mary\" which the picture reveals had been written for Mary and with the intention that it was to be sung by Mary. ", "On this occasion Mary is seen wearing a wedding ring indicating for the first time that she and Cohan were married.", "\nThe picture features music and reproduces scenes from musical plays written and produced by Cohan not only during the comparatively few years during which he was married to the plaintiff, but also from innumerable other musical plays which he wrote and produced during his long and successful career as an actor, composer, author, playwright and producer. ", "No use is made in the picture of the name Mrs. George M. Cohan or Ethel Levey, the stage name by which the plaintiff generally has been known. ", "In the picture there is not reenacted by Joan Leslie any character played by the plaintiff. ", "With one exception Mary never sings alone any song which was sung alone by plaintiff. ", "Mary does not take a leading or conspicuous part in the picture. ", "In it she is a member of the chorus and sings and dances as a member of the chorus. ", "Joan Leslie, who impersonates Mary, does not look nor act like plaintiff. ", "Similarities, if any, between the events of plaintiff's life and the episodes shown in the picture are too insignificant to characterize the plaintiff and are merely incidental to the theme of the picture. ", "It may be that persons who knew the plaintiff or saw her act in plays from which scenes were reproduced in the picture may have been reminded that the plaintiff took part therein but neither the plaintiff herself nor any one who knew her or saw her act or heard her sing would reasonably be led to believe that Joan Leslie portrayed the plaintiff. ", "The reproduction in the picture of songs plaintiff sang and of scenes in which she took part and the introduction of fictional characters and a largely fictional treatment of Cohan's life may hurt plaintiff's feelings but they do not violate her right of privacy.", "\n*42 The right of privacy in this state exists only to the extent that it has been granted by statute, the enactment of which followed the decision by the Court of Appeals of this state in Roberson v. Rochester Folding Box Co., 171 N.Y. 538, 64 N.E. 442, 59 L.R.A. 478, 89 Am.", "St.Rep. 828, holding that under the laws of this state as theretofore existing a person whose actual portrait has been used for advertising without his consent did not have any redress. \"", "The statute is in part, at least, penal, and should be construed accordingly,\" Binns v. Vitagraph Co., 210 N.Y. 51, 55, 103 N.E. 1108, 1110, L.R.A.1915C, 839, Ann.", "Cas. ", "1915B, 1024, and it accordingly has been strictly construed in this state. ", "See Humiston v. Universal Film Manufacturing Co., 189 App.", "Div. ", "467, 476, 178 N.Y.S. 752; Pfaudler v. Pfaudler Co., 114 Misc. ", "477, 186 N.Y.S. 725, affirmed without opinion 197 App.", "Div. ", "921, 188 N.Y.S. 946; Freed v. Loew's Inc., 175 Misc. ", "616, 24 N.Y.S.2d 679. ", "The words in the statute \"portrait or picture\" of a person require more than a mere picture of a scene suggested by a play. ", "They require a clear representation of a person whether by photograph, statue, imitation or word painting. ", "They require a representation of a person at least approaching likeness.", "\nIn the photoplay and in its press exploitation book the defendant states that \"Yankee Doodle Dandy\" is based on the story of George M. Cohan or that it is the life story of George M. Cohan. ", "These statements do not suggest that Mary in appearance, personality, character, mannerism or action resembles the plaintiff or represents the plaintiff.", "\nUnder a picture showing Mary and Cagney in a box it is stated \"Mr. and Mrs. George M. Cohan as portrayed by Joan Leslie and James Cagney, appearing in Warner Bros. `Yankee Doodle Dandy' the star spangled story of America's number one showman George M. Cohan.\" ", "This reference to Mr. and Mrs. George M. Cohan does represent that the fictional Mary is the wife of Cohan but it does not represent that she is the plaintiff. ", "In view of the fact that the picture does not disclose any divorce and gives the impression that Mary was the only Mrs. Cohan, it can not be said that plaintiff is portrayed in that picture.", "\nThe motion picture does not sufficiently portray or picture the plaintiff to justify the conclusion that the defendant violated any right of privacy afforded her by the Civil Rights Law.", "\nThe defendant accordingly is entitled to a decree dismissing the complaint.", "\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "FreeLaw" }

[ 0.001256361254490912, 0.0010711918585002422, 0.0006777872913517058, 0.0007535592885687947, 0.0008570346399210393, 0.000621050305198878, 0.0009249930153600872, 0.0008065527072176337, 0.00070880790008232, 0.0006048630457371473, 0.0008902080589905381, 0.0005938470712862909, 0.0005803997628390789, 0.0006415295065380633, 0.0017693770350888371, 0.0005854517803527415, 0.000627080793492496, 0.0008567344630137086, 0.0007630642503499985, 0.0006270831800065935, 0.0006906168418936431, 0.0013610849855467677, 0.0012714342446997762, 0.0010689364280551672, 0.0006675224867649376, 0.0007278016419149935, 0.0005916006630286574, 0.0007732456433586776, 0.000646700500510633, 0.0011856146156787872, 0.0009853814262896776, 0.0188281312584877, 0.0015812200726941228, 0.008287176489830017, 0.0007646482554264367, 0.0006277044303715229, 0.0006424969178624451, 0.0008297955500893295, 0.0006838532281108201, 0.0007469922420568764, 0.0006703026010654867, 0.0007451280253008008, 0.0009372427011840045, 0.0014610994840040803, 0.0006878174026496708, 0.0038802223280072212, 0.0006497260765172541, 0.0006735775386914611, 0.0007731682853773236, 0.0006650174618698657, 0.0007786501082591712, 0.0009118193411268294, 0.003947421442717314, 0.0005844320403411984, 0.0006881039589643478, 0.0008487391751259565, 0.0011914746137335896, 0.0008913925266824663, 0.0008487391751259565, 0.0014399380888789892, 0.0010428682435303926, 0.0006443258025683463, 0.0006445588660426438, 0.0006188266561366618, 0.0007309531792998314, 0.0008796092006377876, 0.0007273991941474378, 0.0008030097233131528, 0.0007535610347986221, 0.0007001080666668713, 0.0006951102404855192, 0.0019954426679760218 ]

[ "The expression of the phosphotyrosine phosphatase DEP-1/PTPeta dictates the responsivity of glioma cells to somatostatin inhibition of cell proliferation.", "\nHere we characterize the intracellular effectors of the antiproliferative activity of somatostatin in glioma cell lines and post-surgical specimens. ", "The responsiveness to somatostatin correlated with the expression of the phosphotyrosine phosphatase DEP-1/PTPeta, identified in C6 and U87MG cells, in which somatostatin inhibited cell growth. ", "The expression of a dominant negative mutant of DEP-1/PTPeta in C6 cells abolished somatostatin effects, confirming the involvement of this phosphotyrosine phosphatase in such effects. ", "Somatostatin treatment increased the activity of DEP-1/PTPeta and inhibited ERK1/2 activation. ", "Conversely, basic fibroblast growth factor-dependent MEK phosphorylation was not affected, suggesting a direct effect on ERK1/2. ", "In vitro experiments showed that PTPeta was able to interact and dephosphorylate ERK1/2 activated by basic fibroblast growth factor. ", "Furthermore, by transfecting PTPeta in the somatostatin-unresponsive, DEP-1/PTPeta-deficient U373MG cells, the somatostatin-dependent control of cell proliferation was recovered. ", "Finally we evaluated the requirement for DEP-1/PTPeta in somatostatin inhibition of cell proliferation in post-surgical specimens derived from different grade human gliomas. ", "Although all of the glioma analyzed expressed somatostatin receptor mRNA, DEP-1/PTPeta expression was limited to 8 of 22 of the tumors. ", "Culturing seven gliomas, a correlation between the expression of DEP-1/PTPeta and the somatostatin antiproliferative effects was identified. ", "In conclusion we propose that the expression and activation of DEP-1/PTPeta is required for somatostatin inhibition of glioma proliferation." ]

{ "pile_set_name": "PubMed Abstracts" }

[ 0.0011068148305639625, 0.0007330367807298899, 0.0009786507580429316, 0.000938727636821568, 0.0009932129178196192, 0.0010897585889324546, 0.0008122544386424124, 0.0015106846112757921, 0.0008038131636567414, 0.0006876030820421875, 0.002289755502715707, 0.0007136238855309784 ]

[ "The director of Kill Your Darlings has revealed exactly what went into the film’s now-infamous sex scene.", "\n\nThe 2013 historical drama stars Daniel Radcliffe as 20th century poet Allen Ginsberg, who in one notable scene loses his virginity to a stranger he meets at a bar.", "\n\nSpeaking to Vulture, director John Krokidas revealed that Daniel – who has previously joked that he can’t get enough of acting roles that require nudity – was more than forthcoming when it came to ensuring the scene was as authentic as possible.", "\n\n“[He had] no issue doing the scene whatsoever,” Krokidas said. “", "His only question was, ‘Just so I know, how naked do you want me to be — movie-naked or Equus-naked?’ ", "I said, ‘I hate when people block sex scenes in order to play hide-the-genitalia — that feels so forced. ", "So let’s just block it, and if it falls into frame, we’ll shoot it’.”", "\n\nOf course, having penis in-shot produces its own set of risks. ", "But luckily, Dan didn’t need to make any modifications to ensure he captured the poet in all his glory.", "\n\n“I remember going, ‘Oh shit: You’re British, and Allen Ginsberg is one of the most famous Jews of the 20th century,’” Krokidas recalled. “", "And Dan said, ‘John, my mother’s Jewish and I’m circumcised. ", "Play the scene any way you want.’" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "Pile-CC" }

[ 0.04797838628292084, 0.00548021262511611, 0.0006463055033236742, 0.0007405066280625761, 0.0344863124191761, 0.41377750039100647, 0.14468258619308472, 0.7882634997367859, 0.0006746429717168212, 0.90248042345047, 0.06324810534715652, 0.0021828741300851107 ]

[ "require('./angular-locale_ko-kr');\nmodule.exports = 'ngLocale';\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "Github" }

[ 0.0006376106757670641 ]

[ "Q:\n\nWhat's the case when using software licensed under GPL or LGPL\n\nWith everything legal and in line with the ethical questions in software development, is it allowed to use an open source product in my software that I charge a fee for when selling?", "\nScenario: I've developed an PHP Content Management System (CMS) and use some Linux executables licensed under GPL or LGPL in my CMS to accomplish various tasks like image editing. ", "I'm selling the CMS and also including the executables when I deliver the product.", "\nI do not edit the source code of the GPL software, just using it.", "\n\nA:\n\ncharging a fee is not the critical point of GPL, you can charge fees as high as the mt. ", "everest with stuff covered by the (L)GPL. ", "as soon as the GPL-project \"touches\" your own stuff in most cases your stuff must be GPL from that point on as well.", "\nthe LGPL just mildens the \"touch\".", "\neg, lets say you call a system command \"foo\", which is covered by the GPL, as a standalone process of the OS: thats ok, you are not \"really\" touching it. ", "but if you are \"linking\" against a \"libfoo\" which is convered by the GPL, your stuff becomes GPL as well. ", "if \"libfoo\" would be LGPL you would be allowed to link against it.", "\nso, it all depends on \"i just use it\".", "\nread more on the subject over at wikipedia.", "\n\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "StackExchange" }

[ 0.0007852976559661329, 0.0006272263126447797, 0.000603594584390521, 0.0006411908543668687, 0.0010871399426832795, 0.0007092941086739302, 0.0008040074026212096, 0.0007401951006613672, 0.0007706768228672445, 0.00130854279268533, 0.0010197038063779473, 0.0006385077140294015, 0.0005986343021504581, 0.0019954426679760218 ]

[ "/**\n * Author......: Jens Steube <jens.steube@gmail.com>\n * License.....: MIT\n */\n\n#define SHR(x,n) ((x) >> (n))\n\n#define SHA256_S0(x) (ROTR32 ((x), 7) ^ ROTR32 ((x), 18) ^ SHR ((x), 3))\n#define SHA256_S1(x) (ROTR32 ((x), 17) ^ ROTR32 ((x), 19) ^ SHR ((x), 10))\n#define SHA256_S2(x) (ROTR32 ((x), 2) ^ ROTR32 ((x), 13) ^ ROTR32 ((x), 22))\n#define SHA256_S3(x) (ROTR32 ((x), 6) ^ ROTR32 ((x), 11) ^ ROTR32 ((x), 25))\n\n#define SHA256_F0(x,y,z) ((x & y) | (z & (x | y)))\n#define SHA256_F1(x,y,z) (z ^ (x & (y ^ z)))\n\n#define SHA256_F0o(x,y,z) (SHA256_F0 ((x), (y), (z)))\n#define SHA256_F1o(x,y,z) (SHA256_F1 ((x), (y), (z)))\n\n#define SHA256_STEP(F0,F1,a,b,c,d,e,f,g,h,x,K) \\\n{ \\\n h += K; \\\n h += x; \\\n h += SHA256_S3 (e); \\\n h += F1 (e,f,g); \\\n d += h; \\\n h += SHA256_S2 (a); \\\n h += F0 (a,b,c); \\\n}\n\nvoid hashcat_sha256 (uint32_t digest[8], uint32_t W[16])\n{\n uint32_t a = digest[0];\n uint32_t b = digest[1];\n uint32_t c = digest[2];\n uint32_t d = digest[3];\n uint32_t e = digest[4];\n uint32_t f = digest[5];\n uint32_t g = digest[6];\n uint32_t h = digest[7];\n\n #define w0_t W[ 0]\n #define w1_t W[ 1]\n #define w2_t W[ 2]\n #define w3_t W[ 3]\n #define w4_t W[ 4]\n #define w5_t W[ 5]\n #define w6_t W[ 6]\n #define w7_t W[ 7]\n #define w8_t W[ 8]\n #define w9_t W[ 9]\n #define wa_t W[10]\n #define wb_t W[11]\n #define wc_t W[12]\n #define wd_t W[13]\n #define we_t W[14]\n #define wf_t W[15]\n\n SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, a, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, w0_t, SHA256C00);\n SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, h, a, b, c, d, e, f, g, w1_t, SHA256C01);\n SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, g, h, a, b, c, d, e, f, w2_t, SHA256C02);\n SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, f, g, h, a, b, c, d, e, w3_t, SHA256C03);\n SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, e, f, g, h, a, b, c, d, w4_t, SHA256C04);\n SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, d, e, f, g, h, a, b, c, w5_t, SHA256C05);\n SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, c, d, e, f, g, h, a, b, w6_t, SHA256C06);\n SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, a, w7_t, SHA256C07);\n SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, a, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, w8_t, SHA256C08);\n SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, h, a, b, c, d, e, f, g, w9_t, SHA256C09);\n SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, g, h, a, b, c, d, e, f, wa_t, SHA256C0a);\n SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, f, g, h, a, b, c, d, e, wb_t, SHA256C0b);\n SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, e, f, g, h, a, b, c, d, wc_t, SHA256C0c);\n SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, d, e, f, g, h, a, b, c, wd_t, SHA256C0d);\n SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, c, d, e, f, g, h, a, b, we_t, SHA256C0e);\n SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, a, wf_t, SHA256C0f);\n w0_t = SHA256_S1(we_t) + w9_t + SHA256_S0(w1_t) + w0_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, a, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, w0_t, SHA256C10);\n w1_t = SHA256_S1(wf_t) + wa_t + SHA256_S0(w2_t) + w1_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, h, a, b, c, d, e, f, g, w1_t, SHA256C11);\n w2_t = SHA256_S1(w0_t) + wb_t + SHA256_S0(w3_t) + w2_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, g, h, a, b, c, d, e, f, w2_t, SHA256C12);\n w3_t = SHA256_S1(w1_t) + wc_t + SHA256_S0(w4_t) + w3_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, f, g, h, a, b, c, d, e, w3_t, SHA256C13);\n w4_t = SHA256_S1(w2_t) + wd_t + SHA256_S0(w5_t) + w4_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, e, f, g, h, a, b, c, d, w4_t, SHA256C14);\n w5_t = SHA256_S1(w3_t) + we_t + SHA256_S0(w6_t) + w5_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, d, e, f, g, h, a, b, c, w5_t, SHA256C15);\n w6_t = SHA256_S1(w4_t) + wf_t + SHA256_S0(w7_t) + w6_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, c, d, e, f, g, h, a, b, w6_t, SHA256C16);\n w7_t = SHA256_S1(w5_t) + w0_t + SHA256_S0(w8_t) + w7_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, a, w7_t, SHA256C17);\n w8_t = SHA256_S1(w6_t) + w1_t + SHA256_S0(w9_t) + w8_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, a, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, w8_t, SHA256C18);\n w9_t = SHA256_S1(w7_t) + w2_t + SHA256_S0(wa_t) + w9_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, h, a, b, c, d, e, f, g, w9_t, SHA256C19);\n wa_t = SHA256_S1(w8_t) + w3_t + SHA256_S0(wb_t) + wa_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, g, h, a, b, c, d, e, f, wa_t, SHA256C1a);\n wb_t = SHA256_S1(w9_t) + w4_t + SHA256_S0(wc_t) + wb_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, f, g, h, a, b, c, d, e, wb_t, SHA256C1b);\n wc_t = SHA256_S1(wa_t) + w5_t + SHA256_S0(wd_t) + wc_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, e, f, g, h, a, b, c, d, wc_t, SHA256C1c);\n wd_t = SHA256_S1(wb_t) + w6_t + SHA256_S0(we_t) + wd_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, d, e, f, g, h, a, b, c, wd_t, SHA256C1d);\n we_t = SHA256_S1(wc_t) + w7_t + SHA256_S0(wf_t) + we_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, c, d, e, f, g, h, a, b, we_t, SHA256C1e);\n wf_t = SHA256_S1(wd_t) + w8_t + SHA256_S0(w0_t) + wf_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, a, wf_t, SHA256C1f);\n w0_t = SHA256_S1(we_t) + w9_t + SHA256_S0(w1_t) + w0_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, a, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, w0_t, SHA256C20);\n w1_t = SHA256_S1(wf_t) + wa_t + SHA256_S0(w2_t) + w1_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, h, a, b, c, d, e, f, g, w1_t, SHA256C21);\n w2_t = SHA256_S1(w0_t) + wb_t + SHA256_S0(w3_t) + w2_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, g, h, a, b, c, d, e, f, w2_t, SHA256C22);\n w3_t = SHA256_S1(w1_t) + wc_t + SHA256_S0(w4_t) + w3_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, f, g, h, a, b, c, d, e, w3_t, SHA256C23);\n w4_t = SHA256_S1(w2_t) + wd_t + SHA256_S0(w5_t) + w4_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, e, f, g, h, a, b, c, d, w4_t, SHA256C24);\n w5_t = SHA256_S1(w3_t) + we_t + SHA256_S0(w6_t) + w5_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, d, e, f, g, h, a, b, c, w5_t, SHA256C25);\n w6_t = SHA256_S1(w4_t) + wf_t + SHA256_S0(w7_t) + w6_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, c, d, e, f, g, h, a, b, w6_t, SHA256C26);\n w7_t = SHA256_S1(w5_t) + w0_t + SHA256_S0(w8_t) + w7_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, a, w7_t, SHA256C27);\n w8_t = SHA256_S1(w6_t) + w1_t + SHA256_S0(w9_t) + w8_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, a, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, w8_t, SHA256C28);\n w9_t = SHA256_S1(w7_t) + w2_t + SHA256_S0(wa_t) + w9_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, h, a, b, c, d, e, f, g, w9_t, SHA256C29);\n wa_t = SHA256_S1(w8_t) + w3_t + SHA256_S0(wb_t) + wa_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, g, h, a, b, c, d, e, f, wa_t, SHA256C2a);\n wb_t = SHA256_S1(w9_t) + w4_t + SHA256_S0(wc_t) + wb_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, f, g, h, a, b, c, d, e, wb_t, SHA256C2b);\n wc_t = SHA256_S1(wa_t) + w5_t + SHA256_S0(wd_t) + wc_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, e, f, g, h, a, b, c, d, wc_t, SHA256C2c);\n wd_t = SHA256_S1(wb_t) + w6_t + SHA256_S0(we_t) + wd_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, d, e, f, g, h, a, b, c, wd_t, SHA256C2d);\n we_t = SHA256_S1(wc_t) + w7_t + SHA256_S0(wf_t) + we_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, c, d, e, f, g, h, a, b, we_t, SHA256C2e);\n wf_t = SHA256_S1(wd_t) + w8_t + SHA256_S0(w0_t) + wf_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, a, wf_t, SHA256C2f);\n w0_t = SHA256_S1(we_t) + w9_t + SHA256_S0(w1_t) + w0_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, a, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, w0_t, SHA256C30);\n w1_t = SHA256_S1(wf_t) + wa_t + SHA256_S0(w2_t) + w1_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, h, a, b, c, d, e, f, g, w1_t, SHA256C31);\n w2_t = SHA256_S1(w0_t) + wb_t + SHA256_S0(w3_t) + w2_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, g, h, a, b, c, d, e, f, w2_t, SHA256C32);\n w3_t = SHA256_S1(w1_t) + wc_t + SHA256_S0(w4_t) + w3_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, f, g, h, a, b, c, d, e, w3_t, SHA256C33);\n w4_t = SHA256_S1(w2_t) + wd_t + SHA256_S0(w5_t) + w4_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, e, f, g, h, a, b, c, d, w4_t, SHA256C34);\n w5_t = SHA256_S1(w3_t) + we_t + SHA256_S0(w6_t) + w5_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, d, e, f, g, h, a, b, c, w5_t, SHA256C35);\n w6_t = SHA256_S1(w4_t) + wf_t + SHA256_S0(w7_t) + w6_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, c, d, e, f, g, h, a, b, w6_t, SHA256C36);\n w7_t = SHA256_S1(w5_t) + w0_t + SHA256_S0(w8_t) + w7_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, a, w7_t, SHA256C37);\n w8_t = SHA256_S1(w6_t) + w1_t + SHA256_S0(w9_t) + w8_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, a, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, w8_t, SHA256C38);\n w9_t = SHA256_S1(w7_t) + w2_t + SHA256_S0(wa_t) + w9_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, h, a, b, c, d, e, f, g, w9_t, SHA256C39);\n wa_t = SHA256_S1(w8_t) + w3_t + SHA256_S0(wb_t) + wa_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, g, h, a, b, c, d, e, f, wa_t, SHA256C3a);\n wb_t = SHA256_S1(w9_t) + w4_t + SHA256_S0(wc_t) + wb_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, f, g, h, a, b, c, d, e, wb_t, SHA256C3b);\n wc_t = SHA256_S1(wa_t) + w5_t + SHA256_S0(wd_t) + wc_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, e, f, g, h, a, b, c, d, wc_t, SHA256C3c);\n wd_t = SHA256_S1(wb_t) + w6_t + SHA256_S0(we_t) + wd_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, d, e, f, g, h, a, b, c, wd_t, SHA256C3d);\n we_t = SHA256_S1(wc_t) + w7_t + SHA256_S0(wf_t) + we_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, c, d, e, f, g, h, a, b, we_t, SHA256C3e);\n wf_t = SHA256_S1(wd_t) + w8_t + SHA256_S0(w0_t) + wf_t; SHA256_STEP (SHA256_F0o, SHA256_F1o, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, a, wf_t, SHA256C3f);\n\n digest[0] += a;\n digest[1] += b;\n digest[2] += c;\n digest[3] += d;\n digest[4] += e;\n digest[5] += f;\n digest[6] += g;\n digest[7] += h;\n}\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "Github" }

[ 0.013226274400949478 ]

[ "Tagged: sexual positions\n\nSex and water can mix very well if you do it right. ", "Here are a few tips to make sex and water a hot and erotic way to play:\n\n1.) ", "Sex in the shower\nIf you’ve never has sex in the shower, you’re missing on the epitome of hot and steamy sex. ", "It’s a popular scene in movies and even some porno flicks. ", "To have water running over your bodies it a very hot sight indeed. ", "The nipples will be very hard and water will rush off of them like little downspouts in a rainstorm. ", "It makes you want to nibble them. ", "Nipple play is the best in the shower. ", "The tub can also make for interesting positions like prop a leg up and get him squat to to enter. ", "That’s juts an idea but there are other positions you can try. ", "It makes anal toys much easier to clean since you’re already under the water.", "\n\n2.) ", "Sex in a hot tub.", "\nThis is not advisable because of the chlorine can cause a vaginal yeast infection, foreplay is great in a hot tub because your;e so hot already and the heat gets the blood flowing to your erogenous zones better and faster, making you very aroused. ", "I’d save the sex for outside of the hot tub.", "\n\n3.) ", "Sex in the ocean.", "\nThis is a very erotic place to have sex because no one can see you – that is if you;re on the west coast, the waves can hide the view underwater so no one can see, spectators juts think you’re in an embrace. ", "If you are on the east coats of the caribbean, then the water is clear and everyone can see what you’re doing – not that it matters but lf you don;t want to be an exhibitionist make sure there are waves nearby!", "\n\n4.) ", "Sex in the bath.", "\nThis can be difficult if you have only the stars size bath tub. ", "Only left for larger jacuzzi tubs often found in honeymoon suites in a hotel, Make sure you don’t use too much soap or it can cause infection, but a little shouldn’t hurt, This is very popular for honeymooners and allows you to really embrace on a romantic level – or you could be nasty too, it’s easy to go either way!" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "Pile-CC" }

[ 0.4520267844200134, 0.3202090859413147, 0.9140061736106873, 0.07689810544252396, 0.031595997512340546, 0.9499732851982117, 0.4683140516281128, 0.33176282048225403, 0.019587397575378418, 0.0008343775989487767, 0.865382194519043, 0.0008603951428085566, 0.8855137228965759, 0.15609204769134521, 0.4479290843009949, 0.0008758919429965317, 0.7681503891944885, 0.365919291973114, 0.0022624956909567118, 0.00088478036923334, 0.8576467037200928, 0.002808348275721073, 0.003306465921923518 ]

[ "1. ", "Field of the Invention\nThe present invention relates to a tunable optical filter, to an add-drop-continue module which is produced using this filter, to an add-drop-continue device and to a circuit for bundled cross-connect functionality.", "\n2. ", "Description of the Prior Art\nIn order to ensure minimal interference during signal transmission, optical wavelength multiplex networks (WDM networks) are redundantly designed. ", "Ring structures are often provided. ", "At a junctions between different rings, “drop-and-continue” functions are implemented; i.e., the signal is split and is both forwarded through the original ring and transferred into the new ring. ", "For purely optical production of a drop-and-continue function, it is possible to use wavelength demultiplexers, optical switches and wavelength multiplexers.", "\nFor the production of add-drop functions, modules from the company High Wave Technologies are known; which consist of two circulators with interposed tunable filters. ", "In the event of tuning due to a configurational change, however, the retuning of one WDM channel generally interferes with the signals of other WDM channels. ", "These modules are not intended for drop-and-continue functions. ", "It is, however, conceivable to supplement this module with splitters and switches, in order to produce the drop-and-continue function.", "\nFIG. ", "1 represents such an “add-drop-continue module”. ", "It consists of a splitter SP; which divides the optical signal into two signals of roughly equal strength. ", "One component is fed via two circulators having a tunable filter connected in between. ", "In order to produce the drop-and-continue function, one signal component Dk is branched off via the first circulator and the other signal component Ck is forwarded via an optical switch SW (the switch position which is represented).", "\nIn the case of an add-drop function, one signal component Dk is likewise branched off, but a new signal Ak having the same wavelength is simultaneously inserted via the second circulator ZI2. ", "Owing to the use of the optical splitter, the module has in principle an attenuation of at least 3 dB. Depending on the number of add-drop functions, the aforementioned add-drop element is multiply connected in series, so that the attenuation is further increased significantly.", "\nThe cross-connect functionality in optical multi-wavelength multiplex systems (WDM) is needed so that a specific wavelength signal of an incoming multi-wavelength signal can be distributed in any desired direction.", "\n“WDM Gridconnect—ein transparentes faseroptisches Kommunikationsnetz mit Faser—und Wellenlängenmultiplex” [WDM grid-connect—a transparent fiber-optic communications network having fiber and wavelength multiplex] by Hubert Anton Jäger, published by Hartung-Gorre-Verlag, Constance [Germany] 1998 describes a standard optical cross-connect (OXC). ", "Such an optical cross-connect (OXC) having optical n×n space-switching subunits with n incoming bidirectional multi-wavelength signals, each having k wavelengths, is represented in FIG. ", "9. ", "In this case, the optical multi-wavelength signal is decomposed via optical wavelength demultiplexers DMUX into k single-frequency signals which are subsequently switched to any desired output of the space-switching subunit by using optical space-switching subunits of dimension n×n. ", "The single-frequency signals coming together from the outputs of the space-switching subunits are coupled and forwarded via a multiplexer MUX.", "\nA disadvantage with this is the large outlay on equipment which is incurred when making these optical cross-connects (OXC). ", "A circuit having, for example, 64 wavelengths per multi-wavelength signal and 4 bidirectional conductors needs 64 space-switching subunits of dimension 4×4. ", "Furthermore, 64 fiber-optic connections to the corresponding space-switching subunits of dimension n×n have to be installed per multiplexer MUX and demultiplexer DMUX, respectively, plus the same number again from the space-switching subunits to the demultiplexers DMUX or multiplexers MUX on the other side.", "\nJP 1 023 479/U.S. Pat. ", "No. ", "5,963,685 describes an add-drop module which contains a number of reflection filters whose frequencies can be adjusted by mechanical pressure and changing the temperature.", "\nThe patent U.S. Pat. ", "No. ", "5,707,375 likewise specifies an add-drop device whose filters have different and mutually asymmetric edges. ", "By tuning the filters in terms of wavelength, it is possible to obtain complete transmission, complete reflection or partial transmission and reflection. ", "In this solution, it is necessary to have double the number of filters and adjustment devices. ", "However, readjustment of the wavelength during operation leads to interference with the other signals.", "\nThe European patent application EP 0854 378 A2 describes a thermal-optical component which has a splitter and a tunable grating filter. ", "The arrangement operates as an optical switch and can be used to produce add-drop functions. ", "The patent U.S. Pat. ", "No. ", "5,408,319 describes an optical demultiplexer in which tuning to a specific wavelength is carried out not mechanically but by changing the temperature.", "\nThe patent application WO 98/04854 describes an add-drop module which can be tuned by heating strips or magnetoresistors.", "\nWO 99/42893 also discloses a tunable add-drop multiplexer. ", "In order to tune the wavelength, the refractive index of the filter material is changed, for example by heating.", "\nThe known principles are unsuitable or too elaborate for producing an add-drop-continue function.", "\nIt is an object of the present invention to propose an add-drop-continue module having little attenuation, as well as a filter which is suitable for its production and which has a variable transmission characteristic. ", "This module is also intended to permit reconfiguration of channels without causing interference.", "\nIt is another object of the present invention to propose a circuit having cross-connect functionality which allows simple allocation of dynamically assembled multi-wavelength bundles to different conductors. ", "It is another object of the present invention to propose a circuit having cross-connect functionality, which permits reduced complexity of the system. ", "In this case as well, reconfiguration of channels is intended to be made possible without causing interference." ]

{ "pile_set_name": "USPTO Backgrounds" }

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[ "July 20\n\n\n\nEvents\nAD 70 – Siege of Jerusalem: Titus, son of emperor Vespasian, storms the Fortress of Antonia north of the Temple Mount. ", "The Roman army is drawn into street fights with the Zealots.", "\n 792 – Kardam of Bulgaria defeats Byzantine Emperor Constantine VI at the Battle of Marcellae.", "\n 911 – Rollo lays siege to Chartres.", "\n1189 – Richard I of England officially invested as Duke of Normandy.", "\n1225 – Treaty of San Germano is signed at San Germano between Holy Roman Emperor Frederick II and Pope Gregory IX. ", "A Dominican named Guala is responsible for the negotiations.", "\n1398 – The Battle of Kellistown was fought on this day between the forces of the English led by Roger Mortimer, 4th Earl of March against the O'Byrnes and O'Tooles under the command of Art Óg mac Murchadha Caomhánach, the most powerful Chieftain in Leinster.", "\n1402 – Ottoman-Timurid Wars: Battle of Ankara: Timur, ruler of Timurid Empire, defeats forces of the Ottoman Empire sultan Bayezid I.\n1592 – During the first Japanese invasion of Korea, Japanese forces led by Toyotomi Hideyoshi captured Pyongyang, although they were ultimately unable to hold it.", "\n1715 – Seventh Ottoman–Venetian War: The Ottoman Empire captures Nauplia, the capital of the Republic of Venice's \"Kingdom of the Morea\", thereby opening the way to the swift Ottoman reconquest of the Morea.", "\n1738 – Canadian explorer Pierre Gaultier de Varennes et de La Vérendrye reaches the western shore of Lake Michigan.", "\n1799 – Tekle Giyorgis I begins his first of six reigns as Emperor of Ethiopia.", "\n1807 – Nicéphore Niépce is awarded a patent by Napoleon for the Pyréolophore, the world's first internal combustion engine, after it successfully powered a boat upstream on the river Saône in France.", "\n1810 – Citizens of Bogotá, New Granada declare independence from Spain.", "\n1831 – Seneca and Shawnee people agree to relinquish their land in western Ohio for 60,000 acres west of the Mississippi River.", "\n1848 – The first Women's Rights Convention in Seneca Falls, New York, a two-day event, concludes.", "\n1864 – American Civil War: Battle of Peachtree Creek: Near Atlanta, Georgia, Confederate forces led by General John Bell Hood unsuccessfully attack Union troops under General William T. Sherman.", "\n1866 – Austro-Prussian War: Battle of Lissa: The Austrian Navy, led by Admiral Wilhelm von Tegetthoff, defeats the Italian Navy near the island of Vis in the Adriatic Sea.", "\n1871 – British Columbia joins the confederation of Canada.", "\n1885 – The Football Association legalizes professionalism in association football under pressure from the British Football Association.", "\n1903 – The Ford Motor Company ships its first automobile.", "\n1917 – World War I: The Corfu Declaration, which leads to the creation of the post-war Kingdom of Yugoslavia, is signed by the Yugoslav Committee and Kingdom of Serbia.", "\n1920 – The Greek Army takes control of Silivri after Greece is awarded the city by the Paris Peace Conference; by 1923 Greece effectively lost control to the Turks.", "\n1922 – The League of Nations awards mandates of Togoland to France and Tanganyika to the United Kingdom.", "\n1932 – In the Preußenschlag (\"Prussian coup\"), German President Paul von Hindenburg dissolves the government of Prussia\n1934 – Labor unrest in the U.S.: Police in Minneapolis fire upon striking truck drivers, during the Minneapolis Teamsters Strike of 1934, killing two and wounding sixty-seven.", "\n 1934 – West Coast waterfront strike: In Seattle, police fire tear gas on and club 2,000 striking longshoremen. ", "The governor of Oregon calls out the National Guard to break a strike on the Portland docks.", "\n1935 – Switzerland: A Royal Dutch Airlines plane en route from Milan to Frankfurt crashes into a Swiss mountain, killing thirteen.", "\n1936 – The Montreux Convention is signed in Switzerland, authorizing Turkey to fortify the Dardanelles and Bosphorus but guaranteeing free passage to ships of all nations in peacetime.", "\n1938 – The United States Department of Justice files suit in New York City against the motion picture industry charging violations of the Sherman Antitrust Act in regards to the studio system. ", " The case would eventually result in a break-up of the industry in 1948.", "\n1940 – Denmark leaves the League of Nations.", "\n 1940 – California opens its first freeway, the Arroyo Seco Parkway.", "\n1941 – Soviet leader Joseph Stalin consolidates the Commissariats of Home Affairs and National Security to form the NKVD and names Lavrentiy Beria its chief.", "\n1944 – World War II: Adolf Hitler survives an assassination attempt led by German Army Colonel Claus von Stauffenberg.", "\n1949 – Israel and Syria sign a truce to end their nineteen-month war.", "\n1950 – Cold War: In Philadelphia, Harry Gold pleads guilty to spying for the Soviet Union by passing secrets from atomic scientist Klaus Fuchs.", "\n1951 – King Abdullah I of Jordan is assassinated by a Palestinian while attending Friday prayers in Jerusalem.", "\n1954 – Germany: Otto John, head of West Germany's secret service, defects to East Germany.", "\n1960 – Ceylon (now Sri Lanka) elects Sirimavo Bandaranaike Prime Minister, the world's first elected female head of government.", "\n 1960 – The Polaris missile is successfully launched from a submarine, the , for the first time.", "\n1961 – French military forces break the Tunisian siege of Bizerte.", "\n1964 – Vietnam War: Viet Cong forces attack the capital of Định Tường Province, Cái Bè, killing 11 South Vietnamese military personnel and 40 civilians (30 of whom are children).", "\n1968 – The first International Special Olympics Summer Games are held at Soldier Field in Chicago, with about 1,000 athletes with intellectual disabilities.", "\n1969 – Apollo program: Apollo 11's crew successfully makes the first manned landing on the Moon in the Sea of Tranquility. ", "Americans Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin become the first humans to walk on the Moon six and a half hours later.", "\n 1969 – A cease fire is announced between Honduras and El Salvador, six days after the beginning of the \"Football War\".", "\n1974 – Turkish invasion of Cyprus: Forces from Turkey invade Cyprus after a coup d'état, organised by the dictator of Greece, against president Makarios.", "\n1976 – The American Viking 1 lander successfully lands on Mars.", "\n1977 – The Central Intelligence Agency releases documents under the Freedom of Information Act revealing it had engaged in mind-control experiments.", "\n 1977 – The Johnstown flood of 1977 kills 84 people and causes millions of dollars in damages. ", "\n1982 – Hyde Park and Regent's Park bombings: The Provisional IRA detonates two bombs in Hyde Park and Regent's Park in central London, killing eight soldiers, wounding forty-seven people, and leading to the deaths of seven horses.", "\n1985 – The government of Aruba passes legislation to secede from the Netherlands Antilles.", "\n1989 – Burma's ruling junta puts opposition leader Daw Aung San Suu Kyi under house arrest.", "\n1992 – Václav Havel resigns as president of Czechoslovakia.", "\n1997 – The fully restored (a.k.a. ", "Old Ironsides) celebrates its 200th birthday by setting sail for the first time in 116 years.", "\n1999 – The Chinese Communist Party begins a persecution campaign against Falun Gong, arresting thousands nationwide.", "\n2005 – The Civil Marriage Act legalizes same-sex marriage in Canada. ", "\n2012 – James Holmes opened fire at a movie theater in Aurora, Colorado, killing 12 and injuring 70 others.", "\n2013 – Seventeen government soldiers are killed in an attack by FARC revolutionaries in the Colombian department of Arauca.", "\n2015 – A huge explosion in the mostly Kurdish border town of Suruç, Turkey, targeting the Socialist Youth Associations Federation, kills at least 31 people and injures over 100.", "\n 2015 – The United States and Cuba resume full diplomatic relations after five decades.", "\n2017 – O. J. Simpson is granted parole to be released from prison after serving nine years of a 33-year sentence after being convicted of armed robbery in Las Vegas.", "\n\nBirths\n\n356 BC – Alexander the Great, Macedonian king (d. 323 BC)\n 647 – Yazid I, Arabian caliph (d. 683)\n 682 – Taichō, Japanese monk and scholar (d. 767)\n1304 – Petrarch, Italian poet and scholar (d. 1374)\n1313 – John Tiptoft, 2nd Baron Tibetot (d. 1367)\n1346 – Margaret, Countess of Pembroke, daughter of King Edward III of England (d. 1361)\n1470 – John Bourchier, 1st Earl of Bath, English noble (d. 1539)\n1519 – Pope Innocent IX (d. 1591)\n1537 – Arnaud d'Ossat, French cardinal (d. 1604)\n1583 – Alban Roe, English Benedictine martyr (d. 1642)\n1591 – Anne Hutchinson, English Puritan preacher (d. 1643)\n1592 – Johan Björnsson Printz, governor of New Sweden (d. 1663)\n1601 – Robert Wallop, English politician (d. 1667)\n1620 – Nikolaes Heinsius the Elder, Dutch poet and scholar (d. 1681)\n1649 – William Bentinck, 1st Earl of Portland (d. 1709)\n1754 – Antoine Destutt de Tracy, French philosopher and academic (d. 1836)\n1757 – Garsevan Chavchavadze, Georgian politician and diplomat (d. 1811)\n1762 – Jakob Haibel, Austrian tenor and composer (d. 1826)\n1774 – Auguste de Marmont, French general (d. 1852)\n1789 – Mahmud II, Ottoman sultan (d. 1839)\n1804 – Richard Owen, English biologist, anatomist, and paleontologist (d. 1892)\n1822 – Gregor Mendel, Austro-German monk, geneticist and botanist (d. 1884)\n1838 – Augustin Daly, American playwright and manager (d. 1899)\n 1838 – William Paine Lord, American lawyer and politician, 9th Governor of Oregon (d. 1911)\n 1838 – Sir George Trevelyan, 2nd Baronet, English civil servant and politician, Chancellor of the Duchy of Lancaster (d. 1928)\n1847 – Max Liebermann, German painter and academic (d. 1935)\n1849 – Robert Anderson Van Wyck, American lawyer and politician, 91st Mayor of New York City (d. 1918)\n1852 – Theo Heemskerk, Dutch lawyer and politician, Prime Minister of the Netherlands (d. 1932)\n1854 – Philomène Belliveau, Canadian artist (d. 1940)\n1864 – Erik Axel Karlfeldt, Swedish poet, Nobel Prize laureate (d. 1931)\n 1864 – Ruggero Oddi, Italian physiologist and anatomist (d. 1913)\n1868 – Miron Cristea, Romanian cleric and politician, 38th Prime Minister of Romania (d. 1939)\n1873 – Alberto Santos-Dumont, Brazilian pilot (d. 1932)\n1876 – Otto Blumenthal, German mathematician and academic (d. 1944)\n1877 – Tom Crean, Irish sailor and explorer (d. 1938)\n1882 – Olga Hahn-Neurath, Austrian mathematician and philosopher (d. 1937)\n1889 – John Reith, 1st Baron Reith, Scottish broadcaster, co-founded BBC (d. 1971)\n1890 – Verna Felton, American actress (d. 1966)\n 1890 – Julie Vinter Hansen, Danish-Swiss astronomer and academic (d. 1960)\n 1890 – Giorgio Morandi, Italian painter (d. 1964) \n1893 – George Llewelyn Davies, English soldier (d. 1915)\n1895 – László Moholy-Nagy, Hungarian painter, photographer, and sculptor (d. 1946)\n1897 – Tadeusz Reichstein, Polish-Swiss chemist and academic, Nobel Prize laureate (d. 1996)\n1900 – Maurice Leyland, English cricketer and coach (d. 1967)\n1901 – Vehbi Koç, Turkish businessman and philanthropist, founded Koç Holding (d. 1996)\n 1901 – Eugenio Lopez Sr., ", "Filipino businessman and founder of the Lopez Group of Companies (d. 1975)\n 1901 – Heinie Manush, American baseball player and manager (d. 1971)\n1902 – Leonidas Berry, American gastroenterologist (d. 1995)\n1905 – Joseph Levis, American foil fencer (d. 2005)\n1909 – Eric Rowan, South African cricketer (d. 1993)\n1910 – Vilém Tauský, Czech-English conductor and composer (d. 2004)\n1911 – Baqa Jilani, Indian cricketer (d. 1941)\n 1911 – José Zabala-Santos, Filipino author and illustrator (d. 1985)\n1912 – George Johnston, Australian journalist and author (d. 1970)\n1914 – Dobri Dobrev, Bulgarian philanthropist (d. 2018)\n 1914 – Charilaos Florakis, Greek politician (d. 2005)\n 1914 – Ersilio Tonini, Italian cardinal (d. 2013)\n1918 – Cindy Walker, American singer-songwriter and dancer (d. 2006)\n1919 – Edmund Hillary, New Zealand mountaineer and explorer (d. 2008)\n 1919 – Jacquemine Charrott Lodwidge, English writer\n1920 – Elliot Richardson, American lieutenant and politician, 11th United States Secretary of Defense (d. 1999)\n1921 – Henri Alleg, English-French journalist and author (d. 2013)\n1922 – Alan Stephenson Boyd, American lawyer and politician, 1st United States Secretary of Transportation\n1923 – Stanisław Albinowski, Polish economist and journalist (d. 2005)\n1924 – Lola Albright, American actress and singer (d. 2017)\n 1924 – Thomas Berger, American author and playwright (d. 2014)\n 1924 – Mort Garson, Canadian-American songwriter and composer (d. 2008)\n1925 – Jacques Delors, French economist and politician, 8th President of the European Commission\n 1925 – Frantz Fanon, French–Algerian psychiatrist and philosopher (d. 1961)\n1927 – Barbara Bergmann, American economist and academic (d. 2015)\n 1927 – Heather Chasen, English actress\n 1927 – Michael Gielen, Austrian conductor and composer (d. 2019)\n 1927 – Ian P. Howard, English-Canadian psychologist and academic (d. 2013)\n1928 – Józef Czyrek, Polish economist and politician, Polish Minister of Foreign Affairs (d. 2013)\n 1928 – Belaid Abdessalam, Prime Minister of Algeria\n1929 – Hazel Hawke, Australian social worker and pianist, 23rd Spouse of the Prime Minister of Australia (d. 2013)\n 1929 – Mike Ilitch, American businessman, co-founded Little Caesars (d. 2017)\n 1929 – Rajendra Kumar, Pakistani-Indian actor and producer (d. 1999)\n 1929 – David Tonkin, Australian politician, 38th Premier of South Australia (d. 2000)\n1930 – Giannis Agouris, Greek journalist and author (d. 2006)\n 1930 – Chuck Daly, American basketball player and coach (d. 2009)\n 1930 – William H. Goetzmann, American historian and author (d. 2010)\n 1930 – Sally Ann Howes, English-American singer and actress\n1931 – Tony Marsh, English race car driver (d. 2009)\n1932 – Nam June Paik, American artist (d. 2006)\n 1932 – Otto Schily, German lawyer and politician, German Minister of the Interior\n1933 – Buddy Knox, American singer-songwriter and guitarist (d. 1999)\n 1933 – Cormac McCarthy, American novelist, playwright, and screenwriter\n 1933 – Rex Williams, English snooker player\n1935 – Peter Palumbo, Baron Palumbo, English businessman and art collector\n 1935 – Sleepy LaBeef, American rockabilly singer and musician (d. 2019)\n1936 – Alistair MacLeod, Canadian novelist and short story writer (d. 2014)\n 1936 – Barbara Mikulski, American social worker and politician\n1938 – Deniz Baykal, Turkish lawyer and politician, Deputy Prime Minister of Turkey\n 1938 – Roger Hunt, English footballer\n 1938 – Tony Oliva, Cuban-American baseball player and coach\n 1938 – Diana Rigg, English actress \n 1938 – Natalie Wood, American actress (d. 1981)\n1939 – Judy Chicago, American painter and sculptor\n1941 – Don Chuy, American football player (d. 2014)\n 1941 – Periklis Korovesis, Greek author and journalist\n 1941 – Kurt Raab, German actor, screenwriter, and production designer (d. 1988)\n1942 – Pete Hamilton, American race car driver\n1943 – Chris Amon, New Zealand race car driver (d. 2016)\n 1943 – Bob McNab, English footballer\n 1943 – Adrian Păunescu, Romanian poet, journalist, and politician (d. 2010)\n 1943 – Wendy Richard, English actress (d. 2009)\n1944 – Mel Daniels, American basketball player and coach (d. 2015)\n 1944 – W. Cary Edwards, American politician (d. 2010)\n 1944 – Olivier de Kersauson, French sailor\n 1944 – T. G. Sheppard, American country music singer-songwriter\n1945 – Kim Carnes, American singer-songwriter\n 1945 – Larry Craig, American soldier and politician\n 1945 – John Lodge, English singer-songwriter, bass player, and producer \n 1945 – Bo Rein, American football player and coach (d. 1980)\n1946 – Randal Kleiser, American actor, director, and producer \n1947 – Gerd Binnig, German physicist and academic, Nobel Prize laureate\n 1947 – Carlos Santana, Mexican-American singer-songwriter and guitarist \n1948 – Muse Watson, American actor and producer\n1950 – Edward Leigh, English lawyer and politician\n 1950 – Lucille Lemay, Canadian archer\n1951 – Jeff Rawle, English actor and screenwriter\n1953 – Dave Evans, Welsh-Australian singer-songwriter \n 1953 – Thomas Friedman, American journalist and author\n 1953 – Marcia Hines, American-Australian singer and actress\n1954 – Moira Harris, American actress\n 1954 – Jay Jay French, American guitarist and producer \n1955 – Desmond Douglas, Jamaican-English table tennis player\n 1955 – René-Daniel Dubois, Canadian actor and playwright\n 1955 – Jem Finer, English banjo player and songwriter \n1956 – Paul Cook, English drummer \n 1956 – Thomas N'Kono, Cameroonian footballer\n 1956 – Jim Prentice, Canadian lawyer and politician, 16th Premier of Alberta (d. 2016)\n1958 – Mick MacNeil, Scottish keyboard player and songwriter\n1959 – Radney Foster, American singer-songwriter, guitarist, and producer \n1960 – Claudio Langes, Italian race car driver\n 1960 – Prvoslav Vujčić, Serbian-Canadian poet and philosopher\n 1960 – Sudesh Berry, Indian actor\n1961 – Óscar Elías Biscet, Cuban physician and activist, founded the Lawton Foundation\n1962 – Carlos Alazraqui, American actor, producer, and screenwriter\n 1962 – Giovanna Amati, Italian race car driver\n 1962 – Julie Bindel, English journalist, author, and academic\n1963 – Frank Whaley, American actor, director, and screenwriter\n1964 – Chris Cornell, American singer-songwriter and guitarist (d. 2017)\n 1964 – Terri Irwin, American-Australian zoologist and author\n 1964 – Sebastiano Rossi, Italian footballer\n 1964 – Bernd Schneider, German race car driver\n1965 – Jess Walter, American journalist and author\n1966 – Stone Gossard, American singer-songwriter and guitarist \n 1966 – Enrique Peña Nieto, Mexican lawyer and politician, 57th President of Mexico\n1967 – Courtney Taylor-Taylor, American singer-songwriter and guitarist \n1968 – Jimmy Carson, American ice hockey player\n 1968 – Hami Mandıralı, Turkish footballer and manager\n 1968 – Kool G Rap, American hip-hop artist\n1969 – Josh Holloway, American actor \n 1969 – Kreso Kovacec, Croatian-German footballer\n 1969 – Giovanni Lombardi, Italian cyclist\n 1969 – Joon Park, South Korean-American singer\n 1969 – Tobi Vail, American singer and guitarist \n1971 – Charles Johnson, American baseball player\n 1971 – Sandra Oh, Canadian actress \n1972 – Jamie Ainscough, Australian rugby league player\n 1972 – Jozef Stümpel, Slovak ice hockey player\n 1972 – Erik Ullenhag, Swedish jurist and politician\n 1972 – Vitamin C, American singer-songwriter\n1973 – Omar Epps, American actor\n 1973 – Haakon, Crown Prince of Norway\n 1973 – Peter Forsberg, Swedish ice hockey player and manager\n 1973 – Nixon McLean, Caribbean cricketer\n 1973 – Roberto Orci, Mexican-American screenwriter and producer\n 1973 – Claudio Reyna, American soccer player\n1975 – Ray Allen, American basketball player and actor\n 1975 – Judy Greer, American actress and producer\n 1975 – Erik Hagen, Norwegian footballer\n 1975 – Birgitta Ohlsson, Swedish journalist and politician, 5th Swedish Minister for European Union Affairs\n 1975 – Jason Raize, American singer and actor\n 1975 – Yusuf Şimşek, Turkish footballer and manager\n1976 – Erica Hill, American journalist\n 1976 – Debashish Mohanty, Indian cricketer and coach\n 1976 – Andrew Stockdale, Australian singer-songwriter and guitarist \n 1976 – Alex Yoong, Malaysian race car driver\n1977 – Kiki Musampa, Congolese footballer\n 1977 – Yves Niaré, French shot putter (d. 2012)\n 1977 – Alessandro Santos, Brazilian-Japanese footballer\n1978 – Pavel Datsyuk, Russian ice hockey player\n 1978 – Will Solomon, American basketball player\n 1978 – Elliott Yamin, American singer-songwriter\n 1978 – Ieva Zunda, Latvian runner and hurdler\n1979 – Miklós Fehér, Hungarian footballer (d. 2004)\n 1979 – Charlotte Hatherley, English singer-songwriter and guitarist \n 1979 – David Ortega, Spanish swimmer\n1980 – Tesfaye Bramble, English-Montserratian footballer\n 1980 – Gisele Bündchen, Brazilian model, fashionista, and businesswoman \n1981 – Viktoria Ladõnskaja, Estonian journalist and politician\n1982 – Antoine Vermette, Canadian ice hockey player\n1984 – Alexi Casilla, Dominican baseball player\n 1984 – Matt Gilroy, American ice hockey player\n1985 – John Francis Daley, American actor and screenwriter\n 1985 – Harley Morenstein, Canadian actor and YouTube personality\n 1985 – David Mundy, Australian footballer\n1986 – Osric Chau, Canadian actor, director, producer, and screenwriter\n1987 – Nicola Benedetti, Scottish violinist\n 1987 – Niall McGinn, Irish footballer\n1988 – Julianne Hough, American singer-songwriter, actress, and dancer\n 1988 – Stephen Strasburg, American baseball player\n 1988 – Shahram Mahmoudi, Iranian volleyball player\n1989 – Javier Cortés, Mexican footballer\n 1989 – Cristian Pasquato, Italian footballer\n1990 – Lars Unnerstall, German footballer\n1991 – Chiyoshōma Fujio, Mongolian sumo wrestler\n 1991 – Ryan James, Australian rugby league player\n 1991 – Kira Kazantsev, Miss America 2015\n 1991 – Philipp Reiter, German mountaineer and runner\n 1991 – Merxat, Chinese actor\n 1993 – Steven Adams, New Zealand basketball player\n1995 – Moses Leota, New Zealand rugby league player\n1996 – Ben Simmons, Australian basketball player\n\nDeaths\n 518 – Amantius, Byzantine grand chamberlain and Monophysite martyr\n 833 – Ansegisus, Frankish abbot and saint\n 985 – Boniface VII, antipope of Rome\n1031 – Robert II, king of France (b. 972)\n1156 – Toba, emperor of Japan (b. 1103)\n1320 – Oshin, king of Armenia (b. 1282)\n1332 – Thomas Randolph, 1st Earl of Moray, regent of Scotland\n1387 – Robert IV, French nobleman (b. 1356)\n1398 – Roger Mortimer, 4th Earl of March, Welsh nobleman (b. 1374)\n1453 – Enguerrand de Monstrelet, French historian and author (b. 1400)\n1454 – John II, king of Castile and León (b. 1405)\n1514 – György Dózsa, Transylvanian peasant revolt leader (b. 1470)\n1524 – Claude, queen consort of France (b. 1499)\n1526 – García Jofre de Loaísa, Spanish explorer (b. 1490)\n1600 – William More, English courtier (b. 1520)\n1616 – Hugh O'Neill, Earl of Tyrone, Irish nobleman and rebel soldier (b. 1550)\n1704 – Peregrine White, English-American farmer and soldier (b. 1620)\n1752 – Johann Christoph Pepusch, German-English composer and theorist (b. 1667)\n1816 – Gavrila Derzhavin, Russian poet and politician (b. 1743)\n1866 – Bernhard Riemann, German mathematician and academic (b. 1826)\n1897 – Jean Ingelow, English poet and author (b. 1820)\n1901 – William Cosmo Monkhouse, English poet and critic (b. 1840)\n1903 – Leo XIII, pope of the Catholic Church (b. 1810)\n1908 – Demetrius Vikelas, Greek businessman and author (b. 1835)\n 1908 – Karl Bernhard Zoeppritz, German geophysicist and seismologist (b. 1881)\n1910 – Anderson Dawson, Australian politician, 14th Premier of Queensland (b. 1863)\n1922 – Andrey Markov, Russian mathematician and theorist (b. 1856)\n1923 – Pancho Villa, Mexican general and politician, Governor of Chihuahua (b. 1878)\n1926 – Felix Dzerzhinsky, Russian educator and politician (b. 1877)\n1927 – Ferdinand I, king of Romania (b. 1865)\n1928 – Kostas Karyotakis, Greek poet and author (b. 1896)\n1932 – René Bazin, French author and academic (b. 1853)\n1937 – Olga Hahn-Neurath, Austrian mathematician and philosopher from the Vienna Circle (b. 1882)\n 1937 – Guglielmo Marconi, Italian physicist and engineer, Nobel Prize laureate (b. 1874)\n1941 – Lew Fields, American actor and producer (b. 1867)\n1944 – Ludwig Beck, German general (b. 1880)\n1945 – Paul Valéry, French author and poet (b. 1871)\n1951 – Abdullah I, king of Jordan (b. 1882)\n1953 – Dumarsais Estimé, Haitian lawyer and politician, 33rd President of Haiti (b. 1900)\n 1953 – Jan Struther, English author and hymn-writer (b. 1901)\n1955 – Calouste Gulbenkian, Armenian businessman and philanthropist (b. 1869)\n1956 – James Alexander Calder, Canadian educator and politician, Canadian Minister of Militia and Defence (b. 1868)\n1959 – William D. Leahy, American admiral and diplomat, United States Ambassador to France (b. 1875)\n1965 – Batukeshwar Dutt, Indian activist (b. 1910)\n1968 – Bray Hammond, American historian and author (b. 1886)\n1970 – Iain Macleod, English journalist and politician, Chancellor of the Exchequer (b. 1913)\n1972 – Geeta Dutt, Indian singer and actress (b. 1930)\n1973 – Bruce Lee, American actor and martial artist (b. 1940)\n 1973 – Robert Smithson, American photographer and sculptor (b. 1938)\n1974 – Allen Jenkins, American actor and singer (b. 1900)\n 1974 – Kamal Dasgupta, Bengali music director, composer and folk artist. (", "b. 1912)\n1976 – Joseph Rochefort, American captain and cryptanalyst (b. 1900)\n1977 – Gary Kellgren, American record producer, co-founded Record Plant (b. 1939)\n1980 – Maria Martinez, San Ildefonso Pueblo (Native American) potter (b. 1887)\n1981 – Kostas Choumis, Greek-Romanian footballer (b. 1913)\n1983 – Frank Reynolds, American soldier and journalist (b. 1923)\n1987 – Richard Egan, American soldier and actor (b. 1921)\n1989 – Forrest H. Anderson, American judge and politician, 17th Governor of Montana (b. 1913)\n1990 – Herbert Turner Jenkins, American police officer (b. 1907)\n1993 – Vince Foster, American lawyer and political figure (b. 1945)\n1994 – Paul Delvaux, Belgian painter (b. 1897)\n1998 – June Byers, American wrestler (b. 1922)\n1997 – M. E. H. Maharoof, Sri Lankan politician (b. 1939)\n1999 – Sandra Gould, American actress (b. 1916)\n2002 – Michalis Kritikopoulos, Greek footballer (b. 1946)\n2003 – Nicolas Freeling, English author (b. 1927)\n2004 – Lala Mara, Fijian politician (b. 1931)\n 2004 – Valdemaras Martinkėnas, Lithuanian footballer and coach (b. 1965)\n2005 – James Doohan, Canadian-American actor (b. 1920)\n 2005 – Finn Gustavsen, Norwegian journalist and politician (b. 1926)\n 2005 – Kayo Hatta, American director and cinematographer (b. 1958)\n2006 – Ted Grant, South African-English theorist and activist (b. 1913)\n 2006 – Gérard Oury, French actor, director, and producer (b. 1919)\n2007 – Tammy Faye Messner, American Christian evangelist and talk show host (b. 1942)\n2008 – Artie Traum, American guitarist, songwriter, and producer (b. 1943)\n 2008 – Dinko Šakić, Croatian concentration camp commander (b. 1921)\n2009 – Vedat Okyar, Turkish footballer (b. 1945)\n 2009 – Mark Rosenzweig, American psychologist and academic (b. 1922)\n2011 – Lucian Freud, German-English painter and illustrator (b. 1922)\n2012 – Alastair Burnet, English journalist (b. 1928)\n 2012 – Jack Davis, American hurdler (b. 1930)\n 2012 – José Hermano Saraiva, Portuguese historian, jurist, and politician, Portuguese Minister of Education (b. 1919)\n2013 – Pierre Fabre, French pharmacist and businessman, founded Laboratoires Pierre Fabre (b. 1926)\n 2013 – Khurshed Alam Khan, Indian politician, 2nd Governor of Goa (b. 1919)\n 2013 – Augustus Rowe, Canadian physician and politician (b. 1920)\n 2013 – Helen Thomas, American journalist and author (b. 1920)\n2014 – Victor G. Atiyeh, American businessman and politician, 32nd Governor of Oregon (b. 1923)\n 2014 – Constantin Lucaci, Romanian sculptor and educator (b. 1923)\n 2014 – Bob McNamara, American football player (b. 1931)\n 2014 – Klaus Schmidt, German archaeologist and academic (b. 1953)\n2015 – Wayne Carson, American singer-songwriter and producer (b. 1943)\n 2015 – Fred Else, English footballer and manager (b. 1933)\n 2015 – Dieter Moebius, Swiss-German keyboard player and producer (b. 1944)\n2016 – Radu Beligan, Romanian actor, director, and essayist (b. 1918)\n2017 – Chester Bennington, American singer (b. 1976)\n\nHolidays and observances\nBirthday of Crown Prince Haakon Magnus (Norway)\nChristian feast day:\n Ansegisus\n Apollinaris of Ravenna\n Aurelius\n Ealhswith (or Elswith)\n Elijah\n Elizabeth Cady Stanton, Amelia Bloomer, Sojourner Truth, and Harriet Ross Tubman (Episcopal Church (USA))\n John Baptist Yi (one of The Korean Martyrs)\n Margaret the Virgin\n Thorlac (relic translation)\n Wilgefortis (cult suppressed)\n July 20 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics)\nDía del Amigo (Argentina, Brazil)\nEngineer's Day (Costa Rica)\nIndependence Day, celebrates the independence declaration of Colombia from Spain in 1810.", "\nInternational Chess Day\nLempira Day (Honduras)\nTree Planting Day (Central African Republic)\n\nReferences\n\nExternal links\n\n BBC: On This Day\n \n On This Day in Canada\n\nCategory:Days of the year\nCategory:July" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "Wikipedia (en)" }

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[ "Dent May\n\nDent May is a songwriter from Taylor, Mississippi (USA). ", "He is signed to the Paw Tracks label which released his full-length debut The Good Feeling Music of Dent May & His Magnificent Ukulele in 2009.", "\nIn 2012 his album Do Things was released.", "\nHe was discovered by Animal Collective during the recording of Merriweather Post Pavilion while attending one of their shows in down the Magnolia State. ", "Dent May has \"found his home? ", "in the music of Serge Gainsbourg and Lee Hazlewood. ", "May was also a member of a Mississippi power pop group called The Rockwells." ]

{ "pile_set_name": "Pile-CC" }

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[ "Q:\n\nSQL Select last message for each contact who user has been mailing with\n\nI have a messaging system that reminds of a emailing system - the messages are stored as duplicates - one for the sender and one for the reciver. ", "The \"messages\" table structure is:\nmessage_id | date_and_time | text | user_id | contact_id | sender_id\n\nOnly thing I have here is the user_id and I need to select the last message for all the contacts and order the whole result by the date_and_time DESC so I get result similar to this (user_id=40):\nmessage_id | date_and_time | text | user_id | contact_id | sender_id\n1 | 2014-01-02 20:00:00 | Test 1 | 40 | 32 | 40\n4 | 2014-01-02 12:00:00 | Test 2 | 40 | 99 | 99\n6 | 2014-01-02 09:00:00 | Test 3 | 40 | 28 | 40 \n\nI was looking to other answers and tried to do the query for me but I didnt succeed.", "\nMy guess is that it is something with the MAX() and GROUP BY+ORDER BY\nbut\nSELECT contact_id, MAX(date_and_time) as time_when, * \nFROM messages WHERE user_id = 40\nGROUP BY contact_id, time_when\nORDER BY date_and_time DESC\n\nthrows an error...\nWhere is the error in my query or how should my query look like?", "\nThanks.", "\nEDIT: I am using MySQL(5.6.14)\nEDIT2\nProblem solved thanks to @AgRizzo answer :)\n\nA:\n\nTo get the last message for all the contacts, use this:\nSELECT messages.*", "\nFROM messages\nJOIN (SELECT contact_id, MAX(date_and_time) as time_when\n FROM messages\n GROUP BY contact_id) AS mostrecent\n ON mostrecent.contact_id = messages.contact_id\n AND mostrecent.time_when = messages.date_and_time\nORDER BY date_and_time DESC\n\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "StackExchange" }

[ 0.0006613671430386603, 0.0007098019123077393, 0.0008071358897723258, 0.0006072824471630156, 0.0006812642095610499, 0.0006682545063085854 ]

[ "Q:\n\nBasic Method for Targeting With Anchors In JavaScript/jQuery\n\nI can think of several ways to accomplish what I would like to do below using jQuery, but I would like to know of the most efficient way I can do so:\nI have five visible boxes on my page. ", "I have five hidden boxes on my page. ", "Each visible box is \"assigned\" to a hidden box. ", "When I click on a visible box, it will show the hidden box it is assigned to.", "\nAn example of the HTML I'm using is:\n<div class=\"tag\">Box 1</div>\n<div class=\"tag\">Box 2</div>\n<div class=\"tag\">Box 3</div>\n<div class=\"tag\">Box 4</div>\n<div class=\"tag\">Box 5</div>\n\n<div class=\"hidden-tag\">Box 1</div>\n<div class=\"hidden-tag\">Box 2</div>\n<div class=\"hidden-tag\">Box 3</div>\n<div class=\"hidden-tag\">Box 4</div>\n<div class=\"hidden-tag\">Box 5</div>\n\nAnd then of course:\n.hidden-tag {\n display: none;\n}\n\nUsing jQuery, what would be the most efficient way to show the hidden-tag Box 1 when I click on the tag Box 1?", "\nKeep in mind, I can edit the HTML if needed to draw a connection between each box and its partner.", "\n\nA:\n\nHTML (This is just a clear example. ", "You could obviously use shorter words and no - as well)\n<div id=\"tag1\" class=\"tag\">Box 1</div>\n<div id=\"tag2\" class=\"tag\">Box 2</div>\n<div id=\"tag3\" class=\"tag\">Box 3</div>\n<div id=\"tag4\" class=\"tag\">Box 4</div>\n<div id=\"tag5\" class=\"tag\">Box 5</div>\n\n<div class=\"hidden hidden-tag1\">Box 1</div>\n<div class=\"hidden hidden-tag2\">Box 2</div>\n<div class=\"hidden hidden-tag3\">Box 3</div>\n<div class=\"hidden hidden-tag4\">Box 4</div>\n<div class=\"hidden hidden-tag5\">Box 5</div>\n\njquery\n$('.tag').on('click', function() {\n var x = $(this).attr('id');\n $('.hidden').hide();\n $('.hidden-' + x).show();\n});\n\nSo with this jQuery, when you click on any .tag element, it will save that elements id as the variable x.\nThen we hide all the .hidden's so that they disappear, but then show the one that we want.", "\n\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "StackExchange" }

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[ "The effect of pH on the corrosion of dental metal alloys.", "\nThe aim of this study was to determine the effects of the oral environment's pH on the corrosion of dental metals and alloys that have different compositions, using electrochemical methods. ", "The corrosion rates and the cathodic Tafel slopes were obtained from the current-potential curves. ", "The effect of pH on the corrosion of dental metals and alloys was dependent on their composition. ", "Dissolution of the ions occurred in all of the tested pH states. ", "The dissolution was moderately low for samples containing titanium because its surface was covered with a protective layer, whereas the dissolution was maximal for the samples containing tin and copper. ", "Addition of cobalt and molybdenum to the alloys improved their corrosion resistance; these cobalt and molybdenum alloys were not effected by changes in the pH. Dissolution of the precious metal alloys increased as the percentage of noble metals increased. ", "The corrosion characteristics of dental metals and alloys are important because the corrosion tendencies of dental alloys in the mouth may cause health hazards, weakening and the aesthetic loss of dental restorations." ]

{ "pile_set_name": "PubMed Abstracts" }

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[ "Q:\n\nHow to enable a button and disable other after a validation in c# Xamarin\n\nHi I have the following code:\nusing System;\nusing Android.", "App;\nusing Android.", "Widget;\nusing Android.", "OS;\nusing RestSharp;\nusing Newtonsoft.", "Json;\nusing Android.", "Util;\nusing Newtonsoft.", "Json.", "Linq;\nusing Org.", "Json;\nusing System.", "Net;\nusing System.", "IO;\nusing System.", "Collections.", "Generic;\nusing System.", "Globalization;\nusing App1;\nusing App1.Resources;\n\nnamespace App1\n{\n[Activity(Label = \"App1\", MainLauncher = true, Icon = \"@drawable/icon\")]\npublic class MainActivity : Activity\n{\n EditText edtcpf;\n TextView txtnome;\n TextView txtorder;\n TextView txtsobrenome;\n TextView txtcpf;\n RestClient orderId { get; set; }\n RestClient consumer { get; set; }\n RestRequest cpf { get; set; }\n RestRequest requestorderId { get; set; }\n IRestResponse answerorder { get; set; }\n IRestResponse mensagemConsumer;\n Button btnConsumer;\n RadioButton cancelada;\n RadioButton aberta;\n RadioButton agendada;\n\n protected override void OnCreate(Bundle bundle)\n {\n base.", "OnCreate(bundle);\n\n // Set our view from the \"main\" layout resource\n SetContentView(Resource.", "Layout.", "Main);\n edtcpf = FindViewById<EditText>(Resource.", "Id.edtcpf);\n txtcpf = FindViewById<TextView>(Resource.", "Id.txtcpf);\n txtsobrenome = FindViewById<TextView>(Resource.", "Id.txtresposta);\n txtnome = FindViewById<TextView>(Resource.", "Id.txtNome);\n txtorder = FindViewById<TextView>(Resource.", "Id.txtorder);\n btnConsumer = FindViewById<Button>(Resource.", "Id.btnConsumer);\n cancelada = FindViewById<RadioButton>(Resource.", "Id.rdbtnCancelada);\n aberta = FindViewById<RadioButton>(Resource.", "Id.rdbtnAberta);\n agendada = FindViewById<RadioButton>(Resource.", "Id.rdbtnAgendada);\n btnConsumer.", "Click += BtnConsumer_Click;\n\n }\n\n private void BtnConsumer_Click(object sender, EventArgs e)\n {\n try\n {\n // API Consumer CPF\n\n consumer = new RestClient(\"https://qa.api-latam.whirlpool.com/v1.0/consumers\");\n cpf = new RestRequest(\"/\" + edtcpf.", "Text, Method.", "GET);\n cpf.", "AddHeader(\"Content-Type\", \"application/json; charset=utf-8\");\n cpf.", "AddHeader(\"Authorization\", \"Bearer 70197e6c-d81b-384c-bb32-d69e8c10b101\");\n mensagemConsumer = consumer.", "Execute(cpf);\n Pessoa pessoa = JsonConvert.", "DeserializeObject<Pessoa>(mensagemConsumer.", "Content);\n txtnome.", "Text = \"Nome: \" + pessoa.firstName;\n txtsobrenome.", "Text = \"Sobrenome: \" + pessoa.lastName;\n\n // API Consumer Appliances\n orderId = new RestClient(\"https://qa.api-latam.whirlpool.com/v1.0/consumers/\");\n requestorderId = new RestRequest(\"/\" + edtcpf.", "Text + \"/service-orders\", Method.", "GET);\n requestorderId.", "AddHeader(\"Content-Type\", \"application/json; charset=utf-8\");\n requestorderId.", "AddHeader(\"Authorization\", \"Bearer 70197e6c-d81b-384c-bb32-d69e8c10b101\");\n answerorder = orderId.", "Execute(requestorderId);\n var requestToken = JsonConvert.", "DeserializeObject<RootObject>(answerorder.", "Content);\n var parse = JObject.", "Parse(answerorder.", "Content);\n var QtdeItens = parse.", "Count;\n foreach (var order in requestToken.orders)\n {\n object vader = order.order.orderId;\n string darth = Convert.", "ToString(vader);\n string hora = order.order.orderOpeningDate;\n DateTime dia = Convert.", "ToDateTime(hora);\n txtorder.", "Text = \"OrderId: \" + darth + \"ServiceProviderId: \" + order.order.serviceProviderId + \"Data de abertura: \" + order.order.orderOpeningDate;\n\n if (order.order.orderStatusCode == \"CANC\")\n {\n cancelada.", "Enabled = true;\n agendada.", "Enabled = false;\n aberta.", "Enabled = false;\n }\n\n else\n if (order.order.orderStatusCode.", "Equals(\"ABRT\"))\n {\n cancelada.", "Enabled = false;\n agendada.", "Enabled = false;\n aberta.", "Enabled = true;\n\n }\n\n else\n if (order.order.orderStatusCode.", "Contains(\"AGEN\"))\n {\n cancelada.", "Enabled = false;\n agendada.", "Enabled = true;\n aberta.", "Enabled = false;\n }\n }\n\nWhich one is the correct?", "\n }\n catch (Exception)\n {\n\n throw;\n }\n\n }\n\n}\n\n}\nI'm trying to enable a button depeding on the status the a Json answers has. ", "It can be: \"Closed\", \"CANC\", \"ABRT\" and \"AGEN\". ", "I created 3 radiobuttons and if the Json answer is CANC it show a button, if is ABRT it shows the second button and if it's AGEN the app shows the third button.", "\nI tried it doing: \nif (order.order.orderStatusCode == \"CANC\"){\n cancelada.", "Enabled = true;\n agendada.", "Enabled = false;\n aberta.", "Enabled = false;\n } \n\nBut it didn't work, so how can I do that?", "\n\nA:\n\nIf you have 3 radio buttons and you disable 2 in each scenario, then it doesn't make sense to have radio buttons. ", "\n\nI enable one button to show it and disable the others\n\nI think you want to hide/show the buttons but are using the terms incorrectly. ", "If that is the case then you should use IsVisible property instead of the Enabled property e.g\nif (order.order.orderStatusCode == \"CANC\")\n{\n cancelada.", "IsVisible = true;\n gendada.", "IsVisible = false;\n aberta.", "IsVisible = false;\n}\n\nRemember\n\nIsVisible is used to indicate whether to show the Visual Element or not\nEnabled is used to indicate whether the Visual Element accepts user input or not. ", "For a button, this means the ability to tap it and for a text box, it means the ability to enter text in it.", "\n\nLet me know if this works!", "\n\n" ]

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[ "The present invention relates to semiconductor devices, and more particularly to treating a die receiving area of a lead frame to prevent solder over flow during solder die bonding.", "\nLead frames often have a die pad to which an integrated circuit die is attached. ", "For high power devices, solder is usually used to attach the die to the die pad because of its good thermal/electrical conductivity and ability to absorb stresses due to coefficient of thermal expansion (CTE) mismatches. ", "The solder joint between the lead frame and the silicon die provides a high thermal dissipation of the heat released by the silicon die and a strong resistance of the thermal fatigue.", "\nLead frames are formed of a conductive metal such as copper or a copper alloy. ", "It is also common to plate the lead frame such as with Silver or Palladium to improve die attach quality, and it is further known to spot plate areas of the lead frame like the lead frame fingers and the die pad, in order to improve the die attach quality.", "\nSolder over flow is a common problem encountered in solder die bonding. ", "One method of preventing solder over flow is with a moat formed between the die receiving area and the surrounding area. ", "FIG. ", "1 is a top plan view of a die receiving area 10 of a lead frame having a die 12 attached to a surface thereof. ", "A moat 14 surrounds the die 12. ", "Unfortunately, the moat 14 does not always prevent solder from flowing from below the die 12 and into the surrounding die receiving area. ", "Solder over flow 16 is shown in FIG. ", "1. ", "The moat design is limited by the ratio of die size to die pad size. ", "Such over-flow solder 16 induces stress on the package and weakens the adhesion between the lead frame and a plastic compound that is molded over the die later in the packaging process.", "\nThe wetting ability of molten solder with the lead frame surface influences the flow of solder during die bonding. ", "Conventional lead frames used for solder die bonding have uniform surfaces. ", "That is, all parts of the die pad have the same wetting ability with solder, thus the molten solder flows freely around the die pad when bond pressure is applied.", "\nAccordingly, an object of the present invention is to provide a lead frame with improved solder over flow control and a method for forming the lead frame." ]

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[ "Golden State Warriors general manager Bob Myers finds himself thinking about former NBA player Robert Swift, he says in Chris Ballard’s Sports Illustrated story on the high school phenom and Sonics center’s long road in and out of the NBA.", "\n\nThe story appears in the Sept. 26, 2016, issue of Sports Illustrated. ", "To subscribe, click here.", "\n\nMyers previously served as Swift's agent.", "\n\n“Robert Swift? ", "I think about him all the time,” Myers said.", "\n\nSwift is just 30 years old, and Myers believes he could have a future in professional basketball.", "\n\n“He’s definitely a guy [D-League teams] would go look at,” says Myers. “", "It’s hard to find big guys. ", "But you have to earn it.” ", "Myers pauses. “", "It’s hard for me because I’m so biased. ", "I want to give him a chance. ", "It’s something I’d love to look at. ", "Just for his life, to get back in a good place.”", "\n\nRead the entire story, on Swift’s journey from millionaire to junkie, in this week's Sports Illustrated." ]

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[ "package com.alexstyl.specialdates.upcoming;\n\nimport android.graphics.", "Rect;\nimport android.support.v7.widget.", "RecyclerView;\nimport android.view.", "View;\n\nclass UpcomingEventsDecorator extends RecyclerView.", "ItemDecoration {\n\n private final int spacingFromHeaders;\n private final int itemsInBetweenSpacing;\n\n UpcomingEventsDecorator(int spacingFromHeaders, int itemsInBetweenSpacing) {\n this.spacingFromHeaders = spacingFromHeaders;\n this.itemsInBetweenSpacing = itemsInBetweenSpacing;\n }\n\n @Override\n public void getItemOffsets(Rect outRect, View view, RecyclerView parent, RecyclerView.", "State state) {\n super.getItemOffsets(outRect, view, parent, state);\n RecyclerView.", "ViewHolder childViewHolder = parent.getChildViewHolder(view);\n if (isAHeaderItem(childViewHolder) && isNotFirstItem(childViewHolder)) {\n outRect.top = spacingFromHeaders;\n } else {\n outRect.top = itemsInBetweenSpacing;\n }\n }\n\n private boolean isAHeaderItem(RecyclerView.", "ViewHolder childViewHolder) {\n return childViewHolder instanceof DateHeaderViewHolder;\n }\n\n private boolean isNotFirstItem(RecyclerView.", "ViewHolder childViewHolder) {\n return childViewHolder.getLayoutPosition() !", "= 0;\n }\n}\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "Github" }

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[ "Şehitkamil\n\nŞehitkamil is a district of Gaziantep Province of Turkey. ", "It is part of Gaziantep Metropolitan Municipality. ", " It contains the old city, including Gaziantep Castle, as well as the University of Gaziantep. ", "The population is 593,958 as of 2010. ", "On 20 August 2012, a bomb attack occurred, killing at least eight and wounding nearly 64 people.", "\n\nSee also\nGazikentspor, women's football team promoted to the Turkish Women's First Football League for the 2014–15 season.", "\n\nReferences\n\nExternal links\n Şehitkamil photos\n Şehitkamil Guide\n\nCategory:Populated places in Gaziantep Province\nCategory:Districts of Gaziantep Province" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "Wikipedia (en)" }

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[ "Edward Carrico and Spencer Kearney, with Solar Service in Niles, Ill., install solar panels on a home on Tuesday, March 28, 2017 in Lake Zurich, Ill. (John Konstantaras / For the Chicago Tribune)" ]

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[ "Saint-Étienne-Vallée-Française\n\nSaint-Étienne-Vallée-Française is a commune in the Lozère department in southern France.", "\n\nThe Scottish author Robert Louis Stevenson passed through the village on 2 October 1878, as recounted in his book Travels with a Donkey in the Cévennes:\n\nThe Robert Louis Stevenson Trail (GR 70), a popular long-distance path following Stevenson's approximate route, runs through the village.", "\n\nSee also\nCommunes of the Lozère department\n\nReferences\n\nINSEE commune file\nDepartment Web site\n\nSaintetiennevalleefrancaise" ]

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[ "\n998 So.2d 105 (2009)\nGaye T. BENNETT, et al.", "\nv.\nBOARD OF COMMISSIONERS FOR the EAST JEFFERSON LEVEE DISTRICT, et al.", "\nNo. ", "2008-CC-2706.", "\nSupreme Court of Louisiana.", "\nJanuary 16, 2009.", "\nDenied.", "\nGUIDRY, J., recused.", "\nVICTORY, J., would grant.", "\n" ]

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[ "Optical networks continue to be deployed that provide improved performance in terms of bandwidth and transmission speeds. ", "An aspect of this performance improvement relates to increasing reductions in size for components employed in such networks, one example being optical transceivers. ", "The evolution of today's optical transceivers has been driven by multi-source agreements (MSAs). ", "These agreements establish various standards or specifications for optical and electrical characteristics, pin functions and for other aspects of module form factors for optical transmitters and receivers. ", "For example, standardized features of a so-called SFP, which is a small pluggable form factor, are provided. ", "However, many aspects of optical transceivers are not standardized, including mechanisms for engaging or disengaging a transceiver from a host receptacle or cage for a line card of a switch, for example. ", "Therefore, innovations continue to be developed to make such mechanisms more robust, easier to assemble and easier to manufacture." ]

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[ "<?", "php\n\nreturn [\n /*\n |--------------------------------------------------------------------------\n | Pagination Language Lines\n |--------------------------------------------------------------------------\n |\n | The following language lines are used by the paginator library to build\n | the simple pagination links. ", "You are free to change them to anything\n | you want to customize your views to better match your application.", "\n |\n */\n\n 'previous' => '&laquo; Cynt',\n 'next' => 'Nesaf &raquo;',\n];\n" ]

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[ "Writing is important in anthropology because it is our basic form of communication,\nand also because it is fundamental to everything we do. ", "Writing is constantly present,\nso anthropologists must be able to write well.", "\n\nIn my classes, I assign writing with the hope that repeated practice will motivate\nstudents to write on their own. ", "I recommend The Elements of Style to writers, and I expect my students to understand punctuation and style at the sentence\nlevel.", "\n\nAll professionals in anthropology must write, including ethnographers, museum specialists,\narchaeologists, and forensic anthropologists.", "\n\nTo write well, students benefit from having many opportunities to practice writing\nand from taking the initiative to work on their writing that is independent from classroom\nassignments. ", "The Elements of Style, 4th ed. ", "by William Strunk and E.B. White is an excellent resource for learning about\nall aspects of writing. ", "This book is available in the Writing and Learning Commons.", "\n\nStudents who make As in Anthropology writing show a clear understanding of the material,\nand they often can showcase their knowledge through effective writing assignments.", "\nThese students have completed their reading assignments, paid attention to relevant\nlecture materials, summarized and paraphrased pertinent information, written clearly\nand without significant grammatical errors, and included their own ideas and creative\ninsights.", "\n\nStudents who make Bs demonstrate an understanding of their subject but lack specific\ninformation from reading assignments and lectures.", "\n\nStudents who make Cs address the subject but ignore the readings and lectures." ]

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[ "Tools & Resources:\n\nDescription\n\nExceptional luxury home in sought after Nichols Gate. ", "Clean lines with modern elements & designs. ", "Custom built in 2013 by Candelaria Foster. ", "Great location with outdoor living space and private courtyard. ", "Fourth bedroom is optional living space or office space. ", "Home was built to accommodate an elevator to second floor if required. ", "Significant investments have been made on yard, landscaping, fence, etc. ", "Nichols Gate is located in NW Oklahoma City off West Wilshire Boulevard & North May Avenue, minutes from Lake Hefner Parkway and west of Nichols Hills. ", "HOA Dues are $1500.00. ", "The dues go towards the maintenance of the front gate and entry as well as the beautification of the neighborhood. ", "Amazing location in desired area. ", "Washer/Dryer reserved.", "\n\nFREE AUTOMATED EMAIL UPDATES\nSign in to take advantage of all this site has to offer. ", "Save your favorite listings and searches – also receive email updates when listings you like come on the market for free!*Contact Information is NOT Shared*" ]

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[ "You are here\n\nThis debate competition is conceived by the Mission, as a platform to debate and discuss the issues related to national and international heritage, with the ultimate aim of reaching out to the youth and involving them in our activities.", "\n\nThe competition is organised at two levels—the preliminary rounds taking place in 10 centres across the country and the finals at New Delhi.", "\n\nHow to participate?", "\n\nThe Mission and the collaborating institute will invite entries in form of a qualifying essay by advertising in newspapers. ", "10 best essays are invited to debate in the preliminary round. ", "The winners of this round participate in the finals at New Delhi. ", "For example, Varanasi hosted participants from Delhi, Uttaranchal and Uttar Pradesh, So, the Mission will advertise in these states inviting the essays and the 10 best entries participated in the first round at Varanasi. ", "The winners from Varanasi will compete with the winners from other cities at the finals in New Delhi.", "\n\nWho can participate?", "\n\nThe competition is open to students pursuing their graduation and above.", "\n\nWhat are the rules of the competition\n\nRules for the essay\n\nEssay should be either in English or Hindi\n\nA team of two people should send one essay entry\n\nWord limit is 800 words\n\nDecision of the judges will be final and selected candidates will be informed through post\n\nRules for the debate\n\nThe medium of debate can be either Hindi or English.", "\n\nThe participants should carry their University identity cards for the event.", "\n\nThe order of speaking for is decided by lottery.", "\n\nDecision of the judges will be final and selected candidates will be informed through post\n\nIn a team of two, one speaker is required to speak for the motion and one against the motion. ", "Both cannot speak for or against the motion.", "\n\nEach speaker is given a time of 3+1 minutes only, the first bell ringing after 3 minutes and the last and final bell after the completion of 4 th minute\n\nAfter each speech, the speaker will answer questions from the audience as well as other participants. ", "A maximum of 3 questions is allowed. ", "Cross-questioning is not allowed.", "\n\nThe participants are graded on the following parameters:\n\nMatter (content; maximum marks 40)\n\nManner (confidence, articulation; maximum marks 30)\n\nMethod (structure of the speech, time limit, etc; maximum marks 30)\n\nInterjections (maximum marks 30; 10 marks for each question)\n\nParticipants are awarded full 30 marks for interjections in case no questions are asked to them. ", "In case only one question is asked, the answer is evaluated out of 10 marks. ", "Full 20 marks are awarded for the remaining 2 questions.", "\n\nPrizes are awarded for the following:\n\nBest team- Rs. ", "4, 000/-\n\nBest speaker- Rs. ", "3, 000/-\n\nRunners up speaker – Rs. ", "2, 000/-)\n\nBest interjection- two- Rs. ", "300/- each\n\nIn case of a tie, the prize money will be divided between tied teams/speakers. ", "In case of tie for the best speaker, both contenders are awarded Rs. ", "2, 500/- each and no prizes are awarded for runners up.", "\n\nSo far, the preliminary rounds of the Debate have taken place in Varanasi (in collaboration with Banaras Hindu University, Varanasi), Ujjain (in partnership with Vikram University, Ujjain) and Ahmedabad (in collaboration with Mudra Institute of Communications, Ahmedabad).", "\n\nVenue\n\nBest Team\n\nBest Speaker\n\nRunners up Speaker\n\nBest Interjections\n\nVaranasi\n\nRahul Jaipuriyar and Sankalp Chhabra, Delhi College of Engineering, Delhi" ]

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[ "<?", "php\n\nnamespace Guzzle\\Service\\Command;\n\nuse Guzzle\\Common\\Event;\n\n/**\n * Event class emitted with the operation.parse_class event\n */\nclass CreateResponseClassEvent extends Event\n{\n /**\n * Set the result of the object creation\n *\n * @param mixed $result Result value to set\n */\n public function setResult($result)\n {\n $this['result'] = $result;\n $this->stopPropagation();\n }\n\n /**\n * Get the created object\n *\n * @return mixed\n */\n public function getResult()\n {\n return $this['result'];\n }\n}\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "Github" }

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[ "Our emotional goal is to be happy. ", "Unfortunately some people cannot reach their goal of happiness due to depression. ", "Depression is a common mental disorder that presents with depressed mood, loss of interest or pleasure, feelings of guilt or low self-worth, disturbed sleep or appetite, low energy, and poor concentration. ", "These problems can become chronic or recurrent and lead to substantial impairments in an individual\\'s ability to take care of his or her everyday responsibilities. ", "At its worst, depression can lead to suicide, a tragic fatality associated with the loss of about 850 000 lives every year (WHO, 2010). ", "Depression is the leading cause of disability as measured by the Years of Life lived with Disability (YLDs) and the fourth leading contributor to the global burden of disease, disability-adjusted life years (DALYs), in 2000. ", "By the year 2020, depression is projected to reach second place in the ranking of DALYs calculation for all ages, both sexes. ", "Today, depression is already the second cause of DALYs in the age category of 15 -- -44 years for both sexes combined. ", "Depression occurs in persons of all genders, ages, and backgrounds (WHO, 2010). ", "Not only do those who suffer depression try to find ways to become happy again, but also others who want to help are in a constant search to find a means to offset depression. ", "One way to offset depression is through medication, and one of the many medications is lithium. ", "Lithium has been found to be effective in manic-depressive disorder. ", "Manic-depressive Disorder (also called bipolar disorder) is a mood disorder in which a person alternates between depression and mania. ", "Mania (or a manic episode) or a manic episode, is defined by the fourth edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-IV) as a distinct period of abnormally and persistently elevated, expansive or irritable mood lasting at least one week (or less if hospitalization is necessary) and consisting of three or more of the following (four if the mood is only irritable): inflated self-esteem or grandiosity, decreased need for sleep (e.g., feeling rested after only three hours of sleep), more talkative than usual or feeling pressure to keep talking, racing thoughts or thoughts that seem to jump from topic to topic, distractibility (e.g., attention is easily drawn to unimportant details), increased goal-directed activity (either socially, at school or work, or sexually) or psychomotor agitation, excessive involvement in pleasurable activities that have a high potential for negative consequences (e.g., going on buying sprees, foolish business investments, promiscuous sex).\\[[@ref1]\\] These symptoms must be severe enough to significantly impair the individual\\'s functioning in work, school, or social relationships (or must require hospitalization or include psychotic features) and must not be due to the effects of a substance or general medical condition to qualify as a manic episode.\\[[@ref1]\\] Although people who suffer from mania find advice irritating, they need protection from their own poor judgment.\\[[@ref2]\\] Lithium aids to control manic episodes, but is not as effective at controlling depressive episodes. ", "This is why patients who respond to lithium most effectively are those with manic depressive psychosis and a predominant behavior of mania. ", "Often, patients, whose behavior alternates between manic and depressive do less well with lithium treatment.\\[[@ref3]\\] Scientists have discovered that norepinephrine (also called noradrenaline) is overabundant during mania. ", "Norepinephrine is a neurotransmitter that increases arousal and boosts the mood. ", "To control mania, drugs must reduce norepinephrine.\\[[@ref2]\\] Once in the body lithium first reduces the sensitivity of the postsynaptic norepinephrine receptor. ", "If the receptor is less sensitive, then the receptor is less likely to receive norepinephrine and less norepinephrine transfers throughout the body. ", "Lithium also increases the uptake of norepinephrine into the synaptosomes. ", "Synaptosomes are pinched off nerve endings that cannot release hormones such as norepinephrine. ", "Less norepinephrine reduces mania.\\[[@ref4]\\] The exact way lithium reduces norepinephrine is unknown, but based on what is chemically known about lithium and the human body, there are many hypotheses that provide an insight into lithium\\'s capabilities,\\[[@ref2]\\] Patients taking lithium often report of difficulties in concentration, memory, learning, and attention, and many of these complaints are verified on psychometric testing. ", "Laboratory tests of cognitive functions in healthy volunteers on chronic lithium demonstrate that disruptions in memory-learning processes are apparent at the time of memory retrieval.\\[[@ref5]\\] Subjects following chronic lithium treatment produce more errors of commission in remembering previously occurring events, while the errors of omission appear to be unaffected. ", "These effects are different from those produced by other psychoactive drugs that can also selectively alter and disrupt cognitive processes.\\[[@ref5]\\] A study conducted by Al Banchaabouchi *et al*.,\\[[@ref6]\\] in which rats were exposed to lithium for four weeks to reach a typical human therapeutic serum level, resulted in the suppression of a biochemical factor in the hippocampus associated with cognitive processes. ", "Contradictory findings in the literatures abound, but it is apparent that exposure to lithium impairs the function of the brain causing abnormal cell proliferation in some cases and cell loss in others.\\[[@ref7]\\] In the current study we have attempted to evaluate the impact of lithium ingestion on cognition and some subset of sensory skill, by examining comparatively how lithium and a lithium / saline supplement either harms or helps the brain. ", "The therapeutic regime employed in this study is in accordance with Al Banchaabouchi *et al*.,\\[[@ref6]\\] and HealthyPlace.com.", "\n\nMaterials and Methods {#sec1-1}\n=====================\n\nA total of 24 Wistar rats made up of an equal number of males and females were sourced from the animal holdings of the department. ", "The rats were housed in individual wooden cages containing wood shavings, which were regularly changed. ", "The rats were acclimatized for two weeks. ", "During acclimatization, the rats were given feed and water *ad libitum*.", "\n\nAfter the acclimatization period, the rats were randomly grouped into three groups (n = 8), namely, control, lithium-treated, and lithium with saline-treated groups. ", "Each group contained equal number of males and females. ", "The experiment ran for four weeks. ", "The lithium-treated group received 40 mM lithium bicarbonate per kg of feed in their chow for the first one week, while the dosage was increased to 60 mM per kg of feed for the rest of the three weeks. ", "They were fed *ad libitum*.", "\n\nThe lithium-saline group received 0.9% saline solution in addition to lithium in their chow. ", "The control group was given standard feed and water liberally for the period of the experiment. ", "The rats were subjected to a cognitive test using the Barnes maze, assessment of negative geotaxis, Cliff avoidance, and some neurotransmitters (acetylcholine and glutamate)\n\nSpontaneous alternation {#sec2-1}\n-----------------------\n\nThis is a method used to assess the memory of the rats using the Barnes-Style Hole-Maze Avoidance Learning (8). ", "The basic maze is a 48-inch diameter circle with 18 or 20, -3 inch holes evenly spaced around the perimeter. ", "The maze is placed upon a base 2 -- 3 feet above the floor. ", "Under one of the holes is an escape box or tunnel that the rat can crawl into and be safe from the bright light. ", "The escape box can be moved to a different location or the maze can be rotated, to create different learning paradigms (8).", "\n\nProcedure {#sec2-2}\n---------\n\nThe rat was placed in a start cylinder (an open bottom box) in the center of the maze and left there for at least 30 seconds to acclimate.", "\n\nBright spotlights and a video camera recorder were turned on. ", "The start cylinder was carefully lifted from the top of the animal and the stopwatch was started. ", "The rat ran around the maze trying to find a place to hide. ", "It peeked in many of the holes trying to escape. ", "When it found its escape box, it quickly crawled off the maze and out of the light, into the box. ", "If the rat could not find the escape box after four minutes, it had to be placed in the box and allowed to acclimate. ", "If possible, the number of holes, false attempts to escape into the wrong hole, and the time for the rat to find the escape box should be recorded with pencil and paper. ", "Otherwise, the tape should be reviewed and then notes should be made. ", "The rat should be left in the escape box for at least two minutes so that it seemed to the rat like it did really learn to escape.", "\n\nThe training had to be repeated four times per day. ", "With practice, the rat would run directly to the escape box and climb inside. ", "The maze should be rotated, to change the position of the escape box by at least 90 degrees each day. ", "The position of the small holes alignment should be kept consistent. (", "i.e., one hole would always be centered on the north edge. ", "A mark on the curtain or floor could help maintain the symmetry). ", "The rotation and cleaning forced the rat to use his external spatial cues from the room rather than the olfactory or local cues. ", "The maze had to be cleaned thoroughly every day. ", "Between sessions a non-ammonia based spray or damp towel was used. ", "The training had to be for 10 days, with four sessions per day. ", "The sessions had to be at least 15 minutes apart.", "\n\nReflex analyses {#sec2-3}\n---------------\n\n### Negative geotaxis {#sec3-1}\n\nThis was measured by placing the rat on a slope with the head downward, and it scored 0, 1, 2, 3, and 4 if it turned to face up the slope 0° , 45° , 90° , 135° , 180° ,respectively, in a 90-second session, while that of the adult-treated group was measured by the time required for the animal to turn 180° , that is, to hold the tailin a 30-second trial.", "\n\n### Cliff avoidance {#sec3-2}\n\nThis was assessed by placing the animal on the edge of a bench with its nose and forepaws just over the edge and the number of times the animal moved away in three consecutive 30-second trials, was recorded.", "\n\n### Sample collection and chemical analysis {#sec3-3}\n\nThe rats were to be sacrificed with an overdose of pentobarbital at the end of the experimental period. ", "The brain was quickly dissected out and homogenized in distilled water, in a ratio of 1 g of tissue to 5 ml of distilled water for the analysis of neurotransmitters.", "\n\n### Procedure for the determination of neurotransmitters {#sec3-4}\n\nSample used: Brain tissue\n\nProcedure\n\nTwo grams of the sample was weighed in digestion tubes\n\nOne tablet of the selenium catalyst was added into the tube\n\nTen milliliters of concentrated perchloric acid and concentrated nitric acid were added in the ratio of 1:1\n\nThe tubes were placed in the digestion block and allowed to digest slowly\n\nThe digest was washed in a 1000 ml volumetric flask and made-up with distilled water\n\nThe washed samples were read with an Atomic Absorption Spectrophotometer using their respective lamp and wavelength (9)\n\nAcetylcholine 430 nM\n\nGlutamate 470 nM\n\nCalculation: meter reading x slope x dilution factor\n\n### Procedure for determination of trace metals {#sec3-5}\n\nSample used: Serum\n\nProcedure\n\nCentrifuge Blood samples at 3000 rpm for 30 minutes to get the supernatant\n\nRead samples in an Atomic Absorption Spectrophotometer after standardizing the machine and checking its sensitivity (9)\n\nRead samples using respective lamps and wavelength, such as,\n\nMetal Lithium (Li) 670.8\n\nWavelength (nM) -\n\nResults {#sec1-2}\n=======\n\nThe data in this study were evaluated using the SPSS version 10.", "\n\nDetermination of avoidance learning {#sec2-4}\n-----------------------------------\n\n[Table 1](#T1){ref-type=\"table\"} summarizes the data on the cognition test conducted using Barnes-Style Hole-Maze Avoidance Learning. ", "The results showed a significant (*P* \\< 0.05) decline in learning in the lithium-administered group when compared to the control, while the saline / lithium group was not adversely affected.", "\n\n###### \n\nComparison between the lithium, saline / lithiumtreated, and control groups\n\n![](", "JPBS-2-113-g001)\n\nDetermination of neurotransmitters {#sec2-5}\n----------------------------------\n\nThe mean glutamate level increased significantly (*P* \\< 0.05) in the lithium-administered group, while the saline co-administered group showed an insignificant increase (*P* \\> 0.05) \\[[Figure 1](#F1){ref-type=\"fig\"}\\]. ", "For the mean acetylcholine the level declined in the lithium-administered group, but increased in the saline / lithium group when compared to their respective controls, although not significantly \\[[Figure 2](#F2){ref-type=\"fig\"}\\].", "\n\n{#F1}\n\n{#F2}\n\nAssessing the subsets of sensory skill {#sec2-6}\n--------------------------------------\n\nThe subsets of sensory skill (negative geotaxis and Cliff avoidance) assessed in this study were compromised by the effect of the treatment in both cases. ", "The Cliff avoidance test was significantly (*P* \\< 0.05) affected in the lithium-administered group \\[Figures [3](#F3){ref-type=\"fig\"} and [4](#F4){ref-type=\"fig\"}\\].", "\n\n{#F3}\n\n{#F4}\n\nDiscussion {#sec1-3}\n==========\n\nA cognitive test conducted using the Barnes maze in this study showed that lithium ingestion was characterized by a significant (*P* \\< 0.05) decline in learning and memory as compared to the control. ", "However, lithium-saline-treated animals exhibited enhanced cognitive ability. ", "These observations could be due the fact that once lithium was in the body and the compound (lithium carbonate) dissolved, the lithium cation competed with the sodium cations, potassium cations, magnesium cations, and calcium cations. ", "Lithium cations also substituted for the sodium cations and / or potassium cations. ", "These findings were in agreement with those of Harada *et al*.,\\[[@ref10]\\] in which they found that lithium impaired the function of the nerve growth factors in rat cells, leading to abnormalities seen in some cells, and attenuated neurite growth. ", "Al Banchaanbounchi *et al*.,\\[[@ref6]\\] concluded in their study that lithium ingestion resulted in the suppression of biochemical factors in the hippocampus associated with cognitive processes. ", "In the case of lithium-saline-treated animals the exogenous administered sodium probably enhanced the Na---Na exchange across the membrane, leading to stable Na / K ion channels, which delayed or prevented the neuronal injury by lithium. ", "The acetylcholine levels decreased in the lithium-treated group, while it increased in the lithium-saline-treated group. ", "The differential noticed in the treated groups may be explained by the same principle outlined earlier. ", "A previous study showed an increase in the choline concentration in red blood cells when patients underwent lithium treatment. ", "However, the concentration of choline in plasma remained constant. ", "Lithium irreversibly decreased the transport of choline out of the red blood cells, accounting for the decrease in the acetylcholine, noticed in this study.\\[[@ref11]\\] The decrease in outward transport was similar to the sodium ion-lithium ion exchange (the replacement of the lithium ion in the sodium ion---sodium ion exchange). ", "Somehow this exchange allowed lithium out of the red blood cell, but reduced the amount of choline leaving the red blood cell. ", "The exact procedure remains unknown. ", "Choline produced acetylcholine.\\[[@ref11]\\] The glutamate levels in both the experimental groups increased, although not significantly. ", "Lithium exerted a dual effect on the receptors of the neurotransmitter glutamate - acting to keep the amount of glutamate active between the cells at a stable, healthy level, neither too much nor too little. ", "It could be postulated that too much glutamate in the space between neurons caused mania, and too little, depression. ", "A large amount of extra glutamate could lead to epileptic seizures or even kill the second cell from overstimulation.\\[[@ref12]\\] The subset of sensory activity assessed in this study; negative geotaxis and Cliff avoidance were grossly compromised, thus lithium carbonate appeared to have definite negative effects on psychsensory speed. ", "This could be due to the decreased levels of acetylcholine. ", "This result was in agreement with some previous studies.\\[[@ref13][@ref14]\\]\n\nHolistically, the mechanism / s of lithium toxicity on the brain is not clearly understood, but it can be explained by some theories; (1) Lithium competes with sodium, potassium, magnesium, and calcium in the nerve tissues that maintain impulse conduction. ", "By attaching itself to a binding site on the nerve tissue, lithium may change the impulse conduction. ", "This change is caused by either direct action of itself on the macromolecular structure or by displacing one of the other cations. ", "The nerve impulses may change in frequency, change direction, or alter in some other way. ", "This change will probably lead to a change in behavior.\\[[@ref15]\\] (2) The cellular protein carriers bind to or transport sodium, potassium, calcium, and magnesium. (", "3) Studies of the mechanism of action of lithium have focused upon its effects on biogenic amine neurotransmitters,\\[[@ref16][@ref17]\\] which are involved in the actions of antidepressant drugs and may play a role in pathophysiology of affective disorder.\\[[@ref18]\\] The ability of lithium to affect the phosphatidylinositol (PtdIns) system, which is stimulated by biogenic amine neurotransmitters, has led recently to suggestions that interference with this cycle may mediate lithium therapeutic action.\\[[@ref19][@ref20]\\] PtdIns cycle is a major second-messenger system, mediating the actions of numerous hormones and neurotransmitters.\\[[@ref21][@ref22][@ref23]\\] The membranes of these proteins allow neurotransmitter hormones to cross into the protein. ", "Lithium may alter the structure of these proteins not allowing the neurotransmitters into the protein. ", "Neurotransmitter hormones need to enter the protein in order to be carried throughout the body.\\[[@ref15]\\] In order to reach these proteins, neurotransmitters, and AMP production lithium must be able to travel through the body. ", "Lithium travels through the body by the way of red blood.\\[[@ref11]\\] Contradictory findings in literatures abound, but it is apparent that exposure to lithium impairs the function of the brain causing abnormal cell proliferation in some cases and cell loss in others.\\[[@ref7]\\] In conclusion, although lithium is very helpful at reducing mania, one must be very careful when using lithium, or lithium should be co-administered with saline to counter the detrimental effects of lithium noticed in this study, which include impairment on tasks of psychsensory speed and cognition. ", "As the distribution space of lithium approximates that of the total body water, lithium is primarily excreted in urine, with insignificant excretion in the feces. ", "Renal excretion of lithium is proportional to its plasma concentration. ", "The half-life of elimination of lithium is approximately 24 hours. ", "Lithium decreases sodium reabsorption by the renal tubules, which could lead to sodium depletion. ", "Therefore, it is essential for the patient to maintain a normal diet, including salt, and an adequate fluid intake (2500 -- 3000 ml.) ", "at least, during the initial stabilization period. ", "Decreased tolerance to lithium has been reported to ensue from protracted sweating or diarrhea, and if such occur, supplemental fluid and salt should be administered under careful medical supervision and lithium intake reduced or suspended until the condition is resolved.", "\n\nThe financing, writing, and proofreading of this study was carried out solely by the authors.", "\n\n**Source of Support:** Nil\n\n**Conflict of Interest:** None declared.", "\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "PubMed Central" }

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[ "In order to measure a specific component in a liquid sample quickly and simply, for example, glucose, cholesterol or the like in a blood sample, or glucose, hemoglobin or the like in a body fluid sample, a dry type test apparatus comprises a support having thereon a reagent layer containing at least a reagent capable of developing a color by a reaction with the specific component.", "\nWhen the test apparatus is used, the reaction starts by the supply of a liquid sample to one side of the reagent layer.", "\nA color density of the developed color on the reagent layer after the reaction with a specific component corresponds to the amount of the specific component in the liquid sample. ", "Accordingly, the specific component in the liquid sample can be determined by measuring the color density. ", "The color density of the developed color on the reagent layer is measured by applying an incident light to the reagent layer after the color reaction and detecting intensity of the resulting reflected light or transmitted light.", "\nTest apparatuses using reflected light can be divided roughly into two types from the viewpoint of sample supply to the reagent layer; one is a test apparatus having a sample-supplying area and a detecting area (namely, an incident light side area) on the same side, and another is a test apparatus having a sample-supplying area and a detecting area on different sides.", "\nThe test apparatus having a sample-supplying area and a detecting area on the same side is useful in measuring samples having high transparency such as sera and urine, but not suitable for measuring having low transparency such as whole blood.", "\nOn the other hand, the test apparatus having a sample-supplying area and a detecting area on different sides is markedly advantageous, because it is fully possible to measure a sample having low transparency such as whole blood by forming a reflection layer or a separation layer on the reagent layer.", "\nIn the test apparatus having a sample-supplying area and a detecting area on different sides, however, not only the reagent layer but also the structure of the test apparatus itself become complex in comparison with the test apparatus having a sample-supplying area and a detecting area on the same side. ", "Accordingly, new components are often required in addition to the reagent layer and support. ", "Examples of the test apparatus having a sample-supplying side and a detecting side on different sides include those which are disclosed in JP-A-55-59326 and JP-A-4-188065 (the term \"JP-A\" as used herein means an \"unexamined published Japanese patent application\").", "\nThe reflection layer is provided in order to clarify a coloring degree of the reagent layer by reflecting the injected light, and white particles of titanium dioxide or the like are used as its material. ", "The usually used reflection layer has a thickness of from 2 .mu.m to 50 .mu.m. ", "Also, light reflection capacity is added to the reagent layer itself by kneading titanium dioxide with a reagent in the reagent layer.", "\nHowever, the reflection layer has a disadvantage in that it cannot perform complete reflection of light so that the light partially passes through the layer. ", "When the thickness of the light reflection layer is increased in order to prevent such an unnecessary passage of light, the permeability of the liquid sample becomes poor so that proper results cannot be obtained.", "\nIn the case of the test apparatus of JP-A-4-188065, the portion corresponding to the reagent layer, as shown in FIG. ", "2 in expanded view, comprises a porous membrane to be used as a sample-holding layer, a reagent layer prepared from a reagent, a buffer, a binder and the like, a light reflection layer prepared from titanium dioxide which also acts as a blood cell filtration layer, a space where the supplied liquid sample passes, and a cover which forms a space above the reagent layer.", "\nWhen light is injected into the reagent layer from the porous membrane side, types of the resulting reflected light are divided roughly into (1) light reflected from the porous membrane surface, (2) light reflected from the inner portion of the porous membrane and the inner portion of the reagent layer, (3) light reflected from the light reflection layer and (4) light reflected from the cover. ", "Although necessary information among them is only the reflected light of (2) and (3), other types of reflected light are also measured. ", "That is, the reflected light obtained by the injection of light is a mixture of several types of reflected light, and these unnecessary types of reflected light are generally measured as an error.", "\nEven in the case of the same type of liquid sample such as whole blood, hemolytic serum, chromaturia or the like, the liquid sample itself sometimes shows different colors. ", "For example, the color of whole blood varies depending on the difference in its hematocrit value and the like, and the color of serum varies depending on the difference in its degree of hemolysis and the like. ", "Depending on the difference in the color of these liquid samples, coloration of the reagent layer varies and the amount of light passing through the reagent layer also varies.", "\nWhen the measurement is carried out using reflected light, the light reflected from the cover provided on the side which is not the incident direction of the reagent layer (the aforementioned type (4) reflected light) is also simultaneously detected by its passage through the reagent layer, so that difference in the coloration of the reagent layer in each measurement causes changes in the amount of light which passes through the reagent layer and also the amount of the reflected light of type (4) which passed through the same, thus inevitably exerting unnecessary influence upon the measured values." ]

{ "pile_set_name": "USPTO Backgrounds" }

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[ "COVERAGE_REPORT := coverage.txt\nCOVERAGE_PROFILE := profile.out\nCOVERAGE_MODE := atomic\n\ntest:\n\t@echo \"mode: $(COVERAGE_MODE)\" > $(COVERAGE_REPORT); \\\n\tfor dir in `find . ", "-name \"*.go\" | grep -o '.*/' | sort -u`; do \\\n\t\tgo test $$dir -coverprofile=$(COVERAGE_PROFILE) -covermode=$(COVERAGE_MODE); \\\n\t\tif [ $$? !", "= 0 ]; then \\\n\t\t\texit 2; \\\n\t\tfi; \\\n\t\tif [ -f $(COVERAGE_PROFILE) ]; then \\\n\t\t\ttail -n +2 $(COVERAGE_PROFILE) >> $(COVERAGE_REPORT); \\\n\t\t\trm $(COVERAGE_PROFILE); \\\n\t\tfi; \\\n\tdone;" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "Github" }

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[ "Ireland ordered to take big bite of Apple taxes\n\nIn a largely expected but still stunning ruling by the European Union’s antitrust commission, Ireland is being ordered to collect €13 billion ($14.5 billion) of back taxes from tech giant Apple. ", "Details of the 30 August decision are still developing.", "\n\nUnsurprisingly, Irish Finance Minister Michael Noonan “disagrees profoundly” with the ruling. ", "In an official statement, he said:\n\nIreland’s position remains that the full amount of tax was paid in this case and no State aid was provided. ", "Ireland did not give favorable tax treatment to Apple. ", "Ireland does not do deals with taxpayers.", "\n\nApple distribution center near Cork city.", "\n\nThe Irish Times says the penalty “is far in excess of what had been envisioned by Irish authorities,” and that the State will appeal the decision. ", "In an analysis, Cliff Taylor writes:\n\nThe scale of the finding means that the whole issue of multinational tax will be front and center again in international business debate, and this is bound to spark off serious tensions between the European Commission and the U.S., which will be furious at what has happened.", "\n\nIreland is caught right in the middle. ", "It is a decision which will involve significant collateral damage for Ireland, which has always claimed to have a transparent and legally based tax system.", "\n\nIreland’s 12.5 percent corporate tax rate is one of the lowest in the developed world. ", "As The New York Timesreports:\n\nOther incentives and breaks allow companies to cut their bill even further. ", "While it is phasing out some of the more contentious loopholes, Ireland just introduced a new break for revenues on intellectual property, a potentially huge benefit to large technology companies with troves of patents." ]

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[ "Upcoming Shawn Mendes Concert Tickets\n\nGold Coast Tickets is your #1 source for Shawn Mendes tickets on 08/14/2017 and all concert tickets nationwide! ", "When you buy Shawn Mendes tickets from Gold Coast Tickets you can rest assured that your tickets will get you into the concert. ", "View the seating chart above to pick your favorite seats and be there to experience the Shawn Mendes concert live!" ]

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[ "Fenestrane\n\nA fenestrane in organic chemistry is a type of chemical compound with a central quaternary carbon atom which serves as a common vertex for four fused carbocycles. ", "They can be regarded as spiro compounds twice over. ", "Because of their inherent strain and instability, fenestranes are of theoretical interest to chemists. ", "The name—proposed in 1972 by Vlasios Georgian and Martin Saltzman—is derived from the Latin word for window, fenestra. ", "Georgian had intended that \"fenestrane\" solely referred to [4.4.4.4]fenestrane, whose skeletal structure looks like windows, and Kenneth B. Wiberg called that specific structure \"windowpane\". ", "The term fenestrane has since become generalized to refer to the whole class of molecules that have various other ring-sizes. ", "Georgian recommended rosettane for the class, based on the structural appearance as a rosette of flowers.", "\n\nNomenclature and structure\n\nStructures within this class of chemicals can be named according to the number of atoms in each ring in addition to the systematic nomenclature of IUPAC naming rules. ", "The smallest member of the family, consisting of four fused cyclopropane rings, is [3.3.3.3]fenestrane, which has systematic name tetracyclo[2.1.0.01,3.02,5]pentane and is also called pyramidane. ", "The next symmetric member, [4.4.4.4]fenestrane, has four cyclobutane rings fused, and has systematic name tetracyclo[3.3.1.03,9.07,9]nonane. ", "The rings need not all be the same size as each other, so [4.4.4.5]fenestrane has three cyclobutane rings and one cyclopentane ring. ", "Other structural modifications vary the name as usual in systematic nomenclature, so a [4.6.4.6]fenestradiene has two cyclobutane rings and two cyclohexane rings in an alternating pattern and two alkene units in the ring structure.", "\n\nIn addition to the ring sizes, fenestranes can have various combinations of cis and trans geometry at each ring fusion. ", "These details are denoted by \"c\" and \"t\" prefixes to the structure name, listed in the same order as the ring-sizes. ", "For example, c,t,c,c-[4.5.5.5]fenestrane has a trans configuration at one of the cyclopentane/cyclopentane fusions, but cis configuration at the other cyclopentane/cyclopentane fusion and at both butanepentane/cyclopentane fusions.", "\n\nIn an extreme case the central carbon atom, which would ordinarily have tetrahedral molecular geometry for its four bonds gets completely flattened. ", "In the molecular orbital picture for the resulting square planar geometry of methane, two of a total of three sp2-hybridized carbon atomic orbitals form regular bonds with two of the hydrogen atoms as in a planar alkene. ", "The third sp2 orbital interacts in a three-center two-electron bond with the two remaining hydrogen atoms utilizing only the hydrogen electrons. ", "Two additional carbon valence electrons are situated in a p orbital perpendicular to the plane of the molecule. ", "The four C–H bonds are equal due to resonance. ", "In silico calculations show that it takes 95 to 250 kcal/mol (400 to 1,050 kJ/mol) for this process.", "\n\nOne of the most highly strained fenestranes to have been isolated is a [4.4.4.5]fenestrane with bond angles at the central carbon atom of around 130° (based on X-ray crystallography), as compared to the 109.45° standard for tetrahedral atoms. ", "The carbon–carbon bond-lengths deviate from those of normal alkanes as well. ", "Whereas the C–C bond in ethane is 155 pm, in this fenestrane, the bonds extending from the central carbon atom are shortened to 149 pm while those at the perimeter are lengthened to 159 pm.", "\n\nA diterpene called laurenene containing a [5.5.5.7]fenestrane ring system was the first natural fenestrane to be discovered. ", " The first fenestrane ever synthesized was a [4.5.5.6]fenestrane:\n\nPyramidanes\nPyramidane ([3.3.3.3]fenestrane) is the smallest possible fenestrane, and has never been synthesised. ", "If the central carbon were to be tetrahedral, it would have the form of spiropentadiene, but with additional bonds between the two cyclopropyl rings rather than double-bonds within them. ", "The analogous germa- and stannapyramidanes, with trimethylsilyl groups bonded to the corners, Ge[C4(SiMe3)4] and Sn[C4(SiMe3)4] on the other hand have been synthesised. ", "These adopt a square pyramidal geometry analogous to the trigonal pyramid of tetrahedrane, with the germanium or tin atom at the vertex. ", "That atom has an inverted tetrahedral geometry. ", "According to nuclear magnetic resonance analysis, the four carbons of the base of the pyramid behave as an aromatic ring.", "\n\nSynthetic approaches\nIn one study, a [4.5.5.5]fenestrane was synthesized with one carbon atom replaced by nitrogen because aza- compounds and their salts are more likely to form crystalline compounds suitable for X-ray analysis than low-molecular-weight alkanes. ", "In step 1 the alkyl halide 1-iodo-3-butene 1 is converted to a cyanozinc cuprate 2 (by transmetalation of the organozinc iodide with copper cyanide) which reacts in the next step with 1-nitrocyclopentene 3 in a nucleophilic addition whereby the nitronate 4 is captured by phenylselenenyl bromide to the selenium intermediate 5. ", "Hydrogen peroxide oxidation of 5 yields the nitroalkene 6 as a mixture of syn and anti isomers. ", "A [4+2]cycloaddition with n-butylenol ether in presence of trimethylaluminium gives the nitronate 7 and a second [3+2]cycloaddition by heating in presence of potassium carbonate gives the nitroso acetal 8. ", "Hydrogenation with Raney nickel gives the diol 9 which on a double Mitsunobu reaction (with an amine proton donor) gives the azafenestrane 10 as the borane salt.", "\n\nIn the borane salt the N–C–C bond angle is 126°.", "\n\nOne study describes an unusual 8π disrotatory – 6π conrotatory electrocyclic cascade reaction aiming to minimise the number of steps required to synthesise a fenestrane.", "\n\nSee also\nAcepentalene\nTriquinacene\n\nReferences\n\nCategory:Hydrocarbons\nCategory:Cycloalkanes" ]

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[ "Q:\n\nstrange calculate data on a table\n\nI have a table like this\nTable1(A,B)\n\nA B\n3 0\n4 3\n2 2\n0 1\n3 5\n4 6\n. ", " .", "\n. ", " .", "\n. ", " .", "\n. ", " .", "\n\nIt has about 3 million rows. ", "I want to calculate this:\nA_SUM = 3*(3+2+1+5+6+.......) + 4*(2+1+5+6+........) + 2*(1+5+6+...) + 0*(5+6+...) \n+ 3*(6+...) + ........\nB_SUM = 0*(4+2+0+3+4+.......) + 3*(2+0+3+4+........) + 2*(0+3+4+...) + 1*(3+4+...) \n+ 5*(4+...) + ............ \nHow can I calculate this data?", "\n\nA:\n\nYou can do what you want with a cumulative sum. ", " The following syntax is ANSI standard and should work (depending on the version of your database):\nselect sum(a*(revcumb - b)) as a_sum, sum(b*(revcuma - a)) as b_sum\nfrom (select t.*,\n sum(b) over (order by id desc) as revcumb,\n sum(a) over (order by id desc) as revcuma\n from table t\n ) t;\n\nNote that instead of using rows between or range between, this just subtracts the value in the current row from the (reverse) cumulative sum.", "\nAlso note that this assumes the presence of an id column or some other column to specify the ordering of rows. ", " SQL tables are inherently unordered, so you need a column to specify ordering, when that is important.", "\nAnd, if you don't have cumulative sum (i.e. SQL Server < 2012), then you can do the same thing with correlated subqueries.", "\nEDIT:\nSybase may or may not support the above. ", " There are so many different versions of that database that it is hardly worth anything as a tag. ", " I think this will work on most versions:\nselect sum(a*revcumb) as a_sum, sum(b*revcuma) as b_sum\nfrom (select t.*,\n (select sum(b) from table t2 where t2.id > t.id) as revcumb,\n (select sum(a) from table t2 where t2.id > t.id) as revcuma\n from table t\n ) t;\n\n" ]

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[ "James D Steffes\n\t11/02/2000 06:13 PM\n\t\t \n\t\t To: Ginger Dernehl/NA/Enron@Enron\n\t\t cc: \n\t\t Subject: FERC Decision on California Wholesale Markets\n\nGinger --\n\nCan you please distribute to all of Rick's group.", "\n\n1. ", "Talking Points\n2. ", "FERC Order Summary" ]

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[ "Nottingham man in court over football stadium drones Published duration 18 March 2015\n\nimage copyright PA image caption Drones cannot be flown within 50m of a building or structure and must not be flown within 150m of a large gathering of people\n\nA man has been summoned to appear in court over allegations he flew a drone over London landmarks and at several football grounds during matches.", "\n\nNigel Wilson, 42, from Nottingham, is accused of 17 breaches of the Air Navigation Order, Scotland Yard said.", "\n\nHe will appear at Westminster Magistrates' Court on 16 April.", "\n\nMr Wilson is accused of flying the drone at football matches and tourist attractions, including Buckingham Palace, between September and December.", "\n\nThe 42-year-old, of Rockingham Grove, Bingham, is alleged to have flown a \"small unmanned surveillance aircraft\" over the venues and failed to maintain direct and unaided visual contact.", "\n\nThe alleged offences took place on:\n\nSeptember 13 - Liverpool v Aston Villa at Anfield, Liverpool\n\n- Liverpool v Aston Villa at Anfield, Liverpool September 16 - Liverpool v Ludogorets FC at Anfield\n\n- Liverpool v Ludogorets FC at Anfield September 17 - Nottingham Forest v Fulham at The City Ground, Nottingham\n\n- Nottingham Forest v Fulham at The City Ground, Nottingham September 27 - Arsenal v Tottenham Hotspur at Emirates Stadium, London\n\n- Arsenal v Tottenham Hotspur at Emirates Stadium, London September 27 - Palace of Westminster, Queen Victoria Memorial, outside Buckingham Palace and the north bank of the River Thames in London\n\n- Palace of Westminster, Queen Victoria Memorial, outside Buckingham Palace and the north bank of the River Thames in London September 29 - Stoke City v Newcastle United at Britannia Stadium, Stoke-on-Trent\n\n- Stoke City v Newcastle United at Britannia Stadium, Stoke-on-Trent September 30 - Derby County v Bournemouth at iPro Stadium, Derby\n\n- Derby County v Bournemouth at iPro Stadium, Derby October 18 - Manchester City v Tottenham Hotspur, Etihad Stadium, Manchester\n\n- Manchester City v Tottenham Hotspur, Etihad Stadium, Manchester December 2 - Leicester v Liverpool at King Power Stadium, Leicester" ]

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[ "The African elephant is known for its large, floppy ears\n\nThe two elephant species diverged from a common ancestor some 7.6 million years ago, experts working in the US, Germany and Switzerland say.", "\n\nThey came to their conclusion after comparing a genetic analysis of the two species with material derived from the extinct woolly mammoth and mastodon.", "\n\nThe African elephant is much bigger than its Asian counterpart.", "\n\nIt is known for its large, floppy ears, and both sexes have great ivory tusks - unlike the Asian species, in which typically only the males have large external tusks.", "\n\nTooth extract\n\nThe now extinct mastodon was very similar in appearance to the woolly mammoth - with lots of hair and big tusks.", "\n\nGenetically, however, it was very different and is only a distant relative of the elephants.", "\n\nThe mastodon was similar to the woolly mammoth\n\nBy comparing the mastodon's genetic make-up with existing genome sequences for modern elephants and the woolly mammoth, they have built up a family tree for the elephants.", "\n\nThe tree has the African elephant diverging from both the Asian elephant and the mammoth about 7.6 million years ago.", "\n\nThen, at 6.7 million years ago, the Asian elephant and the mammoth also go their separate ways.", "\n\nHuman comparison\n\n\"The cool thing about the mastodon is that we know pretty exactly from the fossil record when it diverged from the elephant and the mammoth,\" said Dr Michael Hofreiter of the Max Planck Institute for Evolutionary Anthropology in Leipzig, Germany, and one of the lead researchers.", "\n\n\"So using that time point and the genetic data, we could date when the African elephant, Asian elephant and mammoth diverged from each other,\" Dr Hofreiter explained.", "\n\n\"That took place in Africa in the same place where humans, chimps and gorillas diverged.\"", "\n\nThe fact that it is now judged that the elephants went their separate ways in the same place and at about the same time we humans diverged from our ape brethren may of course be a coincidence.", "\n\nOr, as Dr Hofreiter suggests, there may be a common environmental or climatic event which set both elephants and humans on their eventual evolutionary course." ]

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[ "In 1890 a wooden idol standing over five metres tall was excavated from a Siberian bog, Shigir, on the eastern slopes of the Ural Mountains, nearly 100 kilometres from Yekaterinburg. ", "Archaeologists were working in the area as prehistoric artefacts had been found during in an open cast gold mine operation.", "\n\nThe bog, with its anaerobic environment, had preserved the idol almost perfectly and it was extracted by Professor D. I. Lobanov. ", "Currently it stands nearly three metres tall as parts of the original idol were lost during the political upheaval in Russia in the last century. ", "All that remains of the missing lengths are the drawings made by the Siberian archaeologist Vladimir Tolmachev.", "\n\nThe idol has a three dimensional carved head atop a long rectangular body. ", "The body is covered with intricate patterns and faces. ", "The first attempt to date this artefact using radiocarbon analyses was undertaken in 1997, when its age was placed at 9,500 years old. ", "This dating caused disputes amongst the scientific community so several miniscule particles were recently removed and sent to Germany for more accurate dating using Accelerated Mass Spectrometry. ", "It is now understood that the idol is around 11,000 years old.", "\n\nWhat would the world have looked like when this idol was carved? ", "It was during what is known as the Mesolithic era, which occurred right at the end of the ice age. ", "It was characterised by very unsettled weather patterns as the air slowly started to warm. ", "With the retreat of the glaciers and the gradual warming, sea levels rose and forests began to appear. ", "This all resulted in a major redistribution of plants and animals. ", "Hunters would have targeted deer, aurochs, elk, goats and sheep. ", "Women would have collected nuts, acorns and other plants, as well as shellfish if they lived near the coast. ", "Humans started to make tools by chipping rocks but these were small and restricted to simple tools such as axes, arrow heads and points for sticks. ", "They would have chopped down trees to build shelters and the first crude canoes were found. ", "Domestication of animals had started and people lived in communities instead of wandering in groups. ", "This start of civilisation also led to people decorating objects, and Mesolithic art was based upon geometric designs with a small range of colours – red ochre being the dominant colour. ", "Artefacts such as painted pebbles, ground stone beads, and pierced shells have been found.", "\n\nThis was the environment in which the creators of the Shigir idol lived. ", "They chopped down a larch tree that was at least 157 years old, as determined by the growth rings that are visible. ", "They used simple stone tools to shape a three dimensional head and a rectangular body at least five meters tall. ", "They then carved seven faces into the body along with a beautiful geometric pattern.", "\n\nThe head has a clear face with eyes, nose, and mouth but the geometric markings on the body have never been deciphered by modern man. ", "There are horizontal lines where the thorax of a body would be and a broken chevron pattern covers the rest of the body, along with several faces that are visible along the length of the sculpture. ", "It is assumed that the patterns are prehistoric man’s attempt to pass on their knowledge in the only manner they understood. (", "Mail Online)\n\nOther scholars believe that the straight lines could denote the horizon. ", "Or perhaps it has spiritual connotations and denotes the border between land and sky, or this world and the next. ", "The wavy lines could denote water or something as simple as a snake; if this is an esoteric piece perhaps it is symbolic of a snake denoting evil. ", "Does the front and the back of the idol denote different worlds, or is one for childhood and one for adults? ", "Perhaps Mesolithic man was trying to tell the story of creation as he understood it. ", "There is no way of knowing, as there is no other written record from this time and no way to compare and decipher the meanings.", "\n\nTo place this in context, this wonderful artefact is twice as old as the Egyptian pyramids and three times as old as Stonehenge. ", "It is a magnificent piece of art that entailed an enormous amount of work for people that had crude tools and must have spent a considerable portion of their day in finding food. ", "It also shows that culture, civilisation, and art were prominent in this area thousands of years before we thought they were.", "\n\nNot only do we stand in awe of this sculpture, we must ask why it ended up in a swamp. ", "We can only hope that this was done purposefully, to ensure that the knowledge held by this people was passed on to others. ", "We can only speculate, but one thing is clear – this idol represents a significant effort on behalf of the people that created it." ]

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[ "Q:\n\nDynamically altering the image source of a canvas object\n\nI have an animation that is ran on a timer along with some other animations. ", "I would like to be able to change the images source file when an event is triggered but i am currently unable to access element.", "Source (element equaling the current canvas object which is a image).", "\npublic static void Clouds(Canvas canvas, int boundry)\n{\n var random = new Random();\n foreach (FrameworkElement element in canvas.", "Children)\n {\n var elementName = Regex.", "Split(element.", "Name, \"_\");\n if (elementName[0] == \"cloud\")\n {\n if (Canvas.", "GetLeft(element) < canvas.", "ActualWidth + element.", "Width)\n {\n Canvas.", "SetLeft(element, Canvas.", "GetLeft(element) + 1);\n } else\n {\n // Change image source file here.", "\n Canvas.", "SetTop(element, random.", "Next(0 - ((int)element.", "Height / 2), Core.", "GetPercentage((int)canvas.", "ActualHeight, boundry)));\n Canvas.", "SetLeft(element, 0 - element.", "Width);\n }\n }\n }\n}\n\nAny help would be great, thanks.", "\n\nA:\n\nIts because FrameworkElement has no property called Source, you have to cast or just pick the image elements you want.", "\nSomthing like this may work\n public static void Clouds(Canvas canvas, int boundry)\n {\n var random = new Random();\n foreach (var image in canvas.", "Children.", "OfType<Image>())\n {\n if (image.", "Name.", "Contains(\"cloud_\"))\n {\n if (Canvas.", "GetLeft(image) < canvas.", "ActualWidth + image.", "Width)\n {\n Canvas.", "SetLeft(image, Canvas.", "GetLeft(image) + 1);\n }\n else\n {\n Canvas.", "SetTop(image, random.", "Next(0 - ((int)image.", "Height / 2), Core.", "GetPercentage((int)canvas.", "ActualHeight, boundry)));\n Canvas.", "SetLeft(image, 0 - image.", "Width);\n }\n }\n }\n }\n\nnow you will be able to access the source property as the var \"image\" is an Image\n\n" ]

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[ "Give to the Max Day | 2013\n\nMore than 800 supporters gave a total of $313,639 to Augsburg College on Give to the Max Day. ", "Thanks to these donors, Augsburg met its goal of being the No. ", "1 fundraising college or university on this annual day of philanthropy." ]

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[ "A resolution criterion for electron tomography based on cross-validation.", "\nDespite much progress in electron tomography, quantitative assessment of resolution has remained a problematic issue. ", "The criteria that are used in single particle analysis, based on gauging the consistency between density maps calculated from half data sets, are not directly applicable because of the uniqueness of a tomographic volume. ", "Here, we propose two criteria based on a cross-validation approach. ", "One, called FSC(e/o), is based on a Fourier shell correlation comparison between tomograms calculated from the even and odd members of a tilt series. ", "The other, called noise-compensated leave-one-out (NLOO), is based on Fourier ring correlation comparisons between an original projection and the corresponding reprojection of the tomogram calculated from all the other projections, taking into account the differing noise statistics. ", "Plotted as a function of tilt angle, they allow assessment of the angular dependence of resolution and quality control over the series of projections. ", "Integrated over all projections, the results give a global figure for resolution. ", "Tests on simulated tomograms established consistency between these criteria and the FSC(ref), a correlation coefficient calculated between a known reference structure and the corresponding portion of a tomogram containing that structure. ", "The two criteria-FSC(e/o) and NLOO-are mutually consistent when residual noise is the major resolution-limiting factor. ", "When the size of the tilt increment becomes a significant factor, NLOO provides a more reliable criterion, as expected, although it is computationally intensive. ", "Applicable to entire tomograms or selected structures, NLOO has also been tested on experimental tomographic data." ]

{ "pile_set_name": "PubMed Abstracts" }

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[ "2 Answers\n2\n\nNo, it's still the client who has to make the initial request. ", "With push, the connection will be kept open on both the server and client (normally, the server closes the connection when the response is finished). ", "The server will this way be able to send multiple responses on a single request instead of only one. ", "The client can process each response individually instead of waiting for the \"last byte\" to be arrived before processing the response.", "\n\nThis construct allows that there can be a server-definied time interval between multiple responses on a single request. ", "This construct also allows that the server can immediately send a response on a server-side event instead of waiting for a client-side event (like as in poll).", "\n\nLong polling sends multiple requests over same connection which is a waste of resources (the server has to get hold of the request until a response can be sent and after that, the client sends another new request again which get hold as well, etc). ", "Server push is multiple responses to a single request (the server doesn't need to get hold of the initial request, the connection is already open and the client understands how to deal with multiple responses).", "\n–\nBalusCJan 30 '13 at 14:22\n\nThanks for your precisions ! ", "Another question : HTTP 2.0 is a \"fork\" of the SPDY protocol (wich is already done and used), does SPDY implement this kind of server push feature ?", "\n–\nEpocJan 30 '13 at 14:50\n\nThe HTTP2 push mechanism is not a generic server push mechanism like websocket or server sent events.", "\n\nIt is designed for a specific optimisation of HTTP conversations. ", "Specifically when a client asks for a resource (eg index.html) the server can guess that it is going to next ask for a bunch of associated resources (eg theme.css, jquery.js, logo.png, etc. ", "etc.) ", "Typically a webpage can have 10s of such associated requests.", "\n\nWith HTTP/1.1, the server had to wait until the client actually sends request for these associated resources, and then the client is limited by connections to only ask for approx 6 at a time. ", "Thus it can take many round trips before all the associated resources that are needed by a webpage are actually sent.", "\n\nWith HTTP/2, the server can send in the response to the index.html GET push promises to tell the client that it is going to also send theme.css, jquery.js, logo.png, etc. ", "as if the client had requested them. ", "The client can then cancel those pushes or just wait for them to be sent without incurring the extra latency of multiple round trips." ]

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[ "Why we love cooperatives!", "\n\nWe at Empower Projects are passionate about cooperatives. ", "Primarily as they are a force for tremendous social, economic and environmental impact the world over!", "\n\nWhat are cooperatives exactly?", "\n\nCooperatives are defined by the International Co-operative Alliance as “An autonomous association of persons united voluntarily to meet their common economic, social, and cultural needs and aspirations through a jointly owned and democratically-controlled enterprise”.", "\n\nIn total, about one billion people are involved in cooperatives in some way, either as members/ customers, as employees/participants, or both. ", "Cooperatives employ at least 100 million people worldwide. ", "It has been estimated that the livelihoods of nearly half the world’s population are secured by cooperative enterprises. ", "The world’s 300 largest cooperative enterprises have collective revenues of USD 1.6 trillion, which are comparable to the GDP of the world’s ninth largest economy Spain (ILO, 2015)\n\nHere is a list of the Top 300 from across the world. ", "These cooperatives are making a positive impact across areas as diverse as agriculture, finance and retail.", "\n\nSo how do we at Empower Projects contribute to the cooperative movement?", "\n\nAs our mission is to enable community self-reliance, we are committed to working in solidarity with communities to build capacity to self-manage development. ", "Thus cooperatives are a perfect model to enable community members to self-organise and work towards common objectives. ", "They key being that it is a truly democratic exercise with community control over membership, resources and activities. ", "We support a number of formal and informal cooperative projects in Malawi.", "\n\nThis is a community operated bank in Nkhata Bay, Malawi. ", "This cooperative currently has 320 members and a democratically elected board that oversees operations through a blend of paid and volunteer staff. ", "This community initiative is focused on addressing financial inclusion in the region. ", "Members gain access to business and agricultural loans in proportion to their investment in shares in the cooperative. ", "This also extends to members sharing any profits that the cooperative generates. ", "This project is expected to impact well over a 1,000 households in the region by providing an ethical (local and affordable) and sustainable source of finance for entrepreneurs and other cooperatives in the region. ", "This cooperative also has great flexibility in terms of being able to design and offer financial products that may be of particular benefit to its membership base e.g. solar energy loans through linkage with local suppliers.", "\n\nSimmilar to the SACCO above, this cooperative in Kapita, Malawi, is an initiative to address financial inclusion in the region. ", "Operating through a share-purchase model, members of this COMSIP can borrow up to 3 times the value of their share value in the cooperative. ", "Yet again, this cooperative is managed through a democratically elected committee with clear policies and guidelines. ", "This initiative currently has 36 active members and has supported over 20 enterprises in the region. ", "Edmond Banda is but one example.", "\n\nThis is a cooperative focused on growing peanuts and sunflowers for processing into cooking oil. ", "This cooperative currently grows these crops and works collectively to garner stronger market prices, their action plan is to build a local factory so that they can add value to their produce and command a higher return. ", "The Kapita region currently lacks any local source of cooking oil.", "\n\nWomen’s Collectives\n\nAs we work with two regions, we have also noticed a pattern of women forming groups. ", "While these are not formal legal structures, women forming savings circles or forming committees for key initiatives e.g. a preschool or meal program are vital to more inclusive collective action.", "\n\nDo you have any questions or comments about cooperatives? ", "We’d love to take this conversation further 🙂\n\nCategories\n\nRecent Events\n\nAbout Empower\n\nWe are an Australian for purpose organisation that enables rural communities to pursue their vision towards self-reliance. ", "We adopt an asset-based approach to development and currently support grassroot initiatives in Malawi and Sri Lanka." ]

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[ "In recent times televisions become more sophisticated and of increasing functionality. ", "Additionally, televisions become more and more integrated into hi-fi networks or other types of networks having different sources at their disposal. ", "During watching a television program, the functionality of the television can be fully used and enjoyed. ", "On the other hand, when no television program is watched and the television is in standby mode or turned off, the television is not used anymore even though it might provide a variety of functions." ]

{ "pile_set_name": "USPTO Backgrounds" }

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[ "Why You Shouldn’t Use an Admin Account as Your Main Account\n\nJust about everyone uses an administrator account for the primary computer account. ", "But there are security risks associated with that. ", "If a malicious program or attackers are able to get control of your user account, they can do a lot more damage with an administrator account than with a standard account. ", "You can protect yourself by using a standard account as your primary account and then temporarily elevating permissions when you need to make administrator changes. ", "What’s the difference between admin accounts and standard accounts? ", "Administrator accounts (or admin accounts) are basically the most powerful account type on a computer." ]

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[ "<?xml version=\"1.0\" encoding=\"utf-8\"?", ">\n<topic id = \"0c24340d-2977-47d4-9010-e3783f4057c5\" revisionNumber = \"1\" >\n<developerConceptualDocument xmlns=\"http://ddue.schemas.microsoft.com/authoring/2003/5\" xmlns:xlink=\"http://www.w3.org/1999/xlink\">\n <introduction>\n<para>\n<legacyBold>Hull Moving Average (HMA)</legacyBold> - the indicator shows the direction of the market trend and represents an improved moving average.", "\n</para>\n<para>\nTo use the indicator, you must use the \n<codeEntityReference>T:StockSharp.", "Algo.", "Indicators.", "HullMovingAverage</codeEntityReference> class.", "\n</para>\n<mediaLink><image placement=\"left\" xlink:href=\"IndicatorHullMovingAverage\"/></mediaLink>\n </introduction>\n\n<relatedTopics>\n<link xlink:href=\"fba3ef70-567c-4bae-b6d9-f7b5f80c7c7a\" />\n</relatedTopics>\n</developerConceptualDocument>\n</topic>\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "Github" }

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[ "// monzo_sumerian_2place12.scl\r\n// \r\n// Monzo - most accurate 2-place sexagesimal 12-tET approximation\r\n// \r\n\r\n@60\r\n\r\n:intervals\r\n\r\n261.6255653006\r\n277.17835052447\r\n293.68632213351\r\n311.15032543183\r\n329.66469551353\r\n349.22211163595\r\n369.93402791915\r\n391.94841243536\r\n415.27867508032\r\n439.91220695103\r\n466.03267445926\r\n493.6331420766\r\n523.2511306012\r\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "Github" }

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[ "Effect of a contusion injury on muscular force, power, work, and fatigue.", "\nThe purpose of the investigation was to compare alterations in muscular force, power, work, and fatigue following a contusion injury. ", "We hypothesized that power and work would be more greatly reduced than isometric force due to several mechanisms that would alter the force-velocity relationship and impair activation/relaxation kinetics specific to dynamic muscle contractions. ", "Contusion injury was administered to the gastrocnemius muscle of adult rats using the drop-mass technique. ", "Isometric force, power during shortening (10, 25, and 40 mm/s), work produced during cyclic contractions (2 and 4 Hz), and fatigue during 60 work loops, were normalized to dry muscle mass and analyzed in control animals (n=11), as well as 1 h (n=11) and 48 h (n=9) following contusion injury. ", "Passive work increased (30-38%) 48 h after injury compared with control (P<0.01). ", "Isometric force, power, and work were significantly reduced by similar magnitudes 1 h (28-33%) and 48 h (28-38%) after injury compared with control (P<0.01). ", "Fatigue index 1 h post-injury was significantly less than control (75% vs 85%; P=0.02). ", "The observed increases in muscle hysteresis were apparently not large enough to cause greater reductions in power and work than isometric force. ", "We conclude that isometric measures provide adequate quantification of muscular dysfunction following a contusion injury in these animals and may offer sufficient information to determine recovery status in clinical settings as well." ]

{ "pile_set_name": "PubMed Abstracts" }

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[ "Edward Walter Nesbitt\n\nEdward Walter Nesbitt (November 23, 1859 – August 28, 1942) was a Canadian insurance and real estate agent and political figure in Ontario, Canada. ", "He represented Oxford North in the House of Commons of Canada from 1908 to 1917 as a Liberal and from 1917 to 1921 as a Unionist Party member.", "\n\nHe was born in Holbrook, Canada West, the son of John W. Nesbitt and Mary Wallace, and was educated in Oxford County. ", "Nesbitt married Mary Elizabeth Ross in 1897. ", "He lived in Woodstock. ", "In 1921, Nesbitt crossed the floor of the House of Commons to become a Conservative; he was defeated when he ran for reelection later that year. ", "He died in Woodstock at the age of 82.", "\n\nHis grand-nephew Wally Nesbitt also later served in the House of Commons.", "\n\nReferences\n\nCategory:Members of the House of Commons of Canada from Ontario\nCategory:Liberal Party of Canada MPs\nCategory:Conservative Party of Canada (1867–1942) MPs\nCategory:1859 births\nCategory:1942 deaths" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "Wikipedia (en)" }

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[ "#ifndef __NEWRES_H__\r\n#define __NEWRES_H__\r\n\r\n#if !", "defined(UNDER_CE)\r\n#define UNDER_CE _WIN32_WCE\r\n#endif\r\n\r\n#if defined(_WIN32_WCE)\r\n\t#if !", "defined(WCEOLE_ENABLE_DIALOGEX)\r\n\t\t#define DIALOGEX DIALOG DISCARDABLE\r\n\t#endif\r\n\t#include <commctrl.h>\r\n\t#define SHMENUBAR RCDATA\r\n\t#if defined(WIN32_PLATFORM_PSPC) && (_WIN32_WCE >= 300)\r\n\t\t#include <aygshell.h>\r\n\t\t#define AFXCE_IDR_SCRATCH_SHMENU 28700\r\n\t#else\r\n\t\t#define I_IMAGENONE\t\t(-2)\r\n\t\t#define NOMENU\t\t\t0xFFFF\r\n\t\t#define IDS_SHNEW\t\t1\r\n\r\n\t\t#define IDM_SHAREDNEW 10\r\n\t\t#define IDM_SHAREDNEWDEFAULT 11\r\n\t#endif // _WIN32_WCE_PSPC\r\n\t#define AFXCE_IDD_SAVEMODIFIEDDLG 28701\r\n#endif // _WIN32_WCE\r\n\r\n#ifdef RC_INVOKED\r\n#ifndef _INC_WINDOWS\r\n#define _INC_WINDOWS\r\n\t#include \"winuser.h\" // extract from windows header\r\n\t//#include \"winver.h\" \r\n#endif\r\n#endif\r\n\r\n#ifdef IDC_STATIC\r\n#undef IDC_STATIC\r\n#endif\r\n#define IDC_STATIC (-1)\r\n\r\n#endif //__NEWRES_H__\r\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "Github" }

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[ "Chronic renal allograft rejection in the rat. ", "Transplantation-induced antibodies against basement membrane antigens.", "\nTo obtain understanding of the immunologic mechanism of chronic rejection-associated glomerular and interstitial renal damage, we investigated the humoral immune response against donor type glomerular and tubular basement membrane proteins in rats with long-surviving renal transplants with and without chronic rejection. ", "Sera from Lewis and Fisher 344 rats with long-surviving Fisher 344 and Lewis renal allografts were investigated by enzyme-linked immunosorbent assay and Western blot analysis using collagenase-digested renal basement membrane preparations from various strains of rats. ", "Kidneys from F344 strain donors transplanted into Lewis recipients developed glomerular lesions consistent with transplant glomerulopathy as well as chronic tubulointerstitial inflammation and fibrosis. ", "Indirect immunofluorescence studies of the Lewis anti-Fisher 344 post-transplant sera showed the presence of antibodies that gave punctate staining in the glomeruli and bright, linear staining of the proximal tubular basement membrane. ", "Dot blot analysis of the sera showed the presence of antibodies against Fisher and third party Brown Norway glomerular basement membranes, whereas no reactivity was found with recipient strain basement membranes. ", "Western blot analysis with glomerular basement membrane preparations showed that the antibodies recognized several antigens under nonreducing (> 200 and approximately 100 kilodaltons) and reducing (> or = 200, approximately 200, approximately 90, approximately 50 to 60, and < 45 kilodaltons) conditions. ", "Western blots with tubular basement membrane proteins showed antibodies against various antigens. ", "Anti-basement membrane antibodies were not found after conventional immunizations with kidney homogenates or after transplantation of cardiac allografts. ", "Fisher 344 rats with long-surviving Lewis renal transplants produced antibodies against laminin fragments, but these antibodies were not associated with transplant glomerulopathy. ", "We found that Lewis rats that carry a Fisher 344 renal allograft with transplant glomerulopathy produce antibodies against one or more novel antigen(s) of donor glomerular and tubular basement membranes. ", "The role of these antibodies in the pathogenesis of transplant glomerulopathy and chronic rejection-associated tubulointerstitial inflammation remains to be established." ]

{ "pile_set_name": "PubMed Abstracts" }

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[ "Q:\n\nGet size for Bytea column in postgreSQL\n\nI have table for store file information. ", "File content is stored in column (column datatype is bytea in PostgreSQL). ", "Now I want to get file content size, based on bytea column data. ", "\nIn SQL Server, I am able to get by using below query:\nselect convert(nvarchar(50),DATALENGTH(FileDataInVarbinary)/ 1048576.0 ) +' MB' as FileSize from Table_FileInfo\n\nCould you suggest me, how we can write in postgreSQL for same above sql query.", "\n\nA:\n\nYou can use the length() function to get the length in bytes:\nselect length(bytea_column) as filesize\nfrom file_info;\n\nIf you want to format the output you can use pg_size_pretty()\nselect pg_size_pretty(length(bytea_column)) as filesize\nfrom file_info;\n\nThat will adapt the \"kb\", \"mb\" output based on the size. ", "If you always want MB, you can use:\nselect concat(length(bytea_column) / 1048576.0, ' MB') as filesize\nfrom file_info;\n\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "StackExchange" }

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[ "141 F.3d 1169\nNOTICE: Eighth Circuit Rule 28A(k) governs citation of unpublished opinions and provides that they are not precedent and generally should not be cited unless relevant to establishing the doctrines of res judicata, collateral estoppel, the law of the case, or if the opinion has persuasive value on a material issue and no published opinion would serve as well.", "Thomas MCDONALD, Plaintiff-Appellant,v.JOHN DEERE COMPANY; Deere & Company, Defendants-Appellees.", "\nNo. ", "97-2839.", "\nUnited States Court of Appeals, Eighth Circuit.", "\nSubmitted: Feb. 11, 1998.Filed: April 8, 1998.", "\n\nAppeal from the United States District Court for the Western District of Missouri.", "\nBefore WOLLMAN and LOKEN, Circuit Judges, and BOGUE,1 Senior District Judge.", "\nPER CURIAM.", "\n\n\n1\nThomas McDonald appeals from the adverse decisions of the judge and the jury in this product liability lawsuit. ", " After a careful review of the law and the record in this case, we reject McDonald's contention that the district court improperly granted partial summary judgment to Deere on McDonald's claim that Deere owed a duty to McDonald to equip a mower with a rollover protection system. ", " We likewise reject McDonald's contention that the district court misinstructed the jury on the issue of assumption of the risk/contributory fault. ", " Having reviewed the challenged instructions under the appropriate standards of review, we conclude that they accurately reflect the applicable law and do not require reversal. ", " We further find that there is sufficient evidence in support of the jury verdict. ", " Having considered McDonald's remaining contentions under well-established standards, we find no error that would require reversal. ", " Because an opinion would have no precedential value, we affirm the district court without further discussion. ", " See 8th Cir. ", " R. 47B.\n\n\n\n1\n The Honorable Andrew W. Bogue, United States District Judge for the District of South Dakota, sitting by designation\n\n\n" ]

{ "pile_set_name": "FreeLaw" }

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[ "Q:\n\nCustom Fields Not Working In Footer\n\nA friend of mine wants the address in his footer to be editable. ", "So I thought to add Custom Fields to a post and then, in the footer call that post (named \"Info Post\") and get the address from a custom field.", "\nI can successfully get the ID of the post but when I try to get the post meta with\necho get_post_meta($post->ID, 'street_address', true); \nnothing happens. ", "\nCould someone explain where I am going wrong? ", "Or if anyone has an idea of how better to do this I'm all ears.", "\nThanks for any all help!", "\nThe code I was using to get $post->ID was requested so I have added it below\nI have attempted to reach the 'street_address' field in a variety of ways but none of them have worked. ", "When I echo $post->ID I do get the correct ID though.", "\n<?", "php \n\n $queryObject = new WP_Query( array(\n 'title' => 'Business Info',\n 'posts_per_page' => 1,\n ));\n\n?", ">\n<?", "php if ( $queryObject->have_posts() ) : ?", ">\n<?", "php while ( $queryObject->have_posts() ) : $queryObject->the_post(); ?", ">\n\n <?", "php \n // print_r($post);\n $street_address = get_post_meta($post->ID, 'street_address', true);\n ?", ">\n <div class=\"large-6 columns\">\n <h3>Our office location is at <?", "php echo $street_address;?>.</h3>\n <!-- ", "Image Here -->\n <p>\n <?", "php echo $post->ID; ?", ">\n <?", "php \n // print_r($post);\n $street_address = the_field('street_address');\n echo $street_address;\n the_field('street_address');\n ?", ">\n <br>\n We'd love to see you there!", "\n </p>\n </div>\n\n<?", "php endwhile;?", ">\n<?", "php else: ?", ">\n<?", "php endif; ?", ">\n<?", "php wp_reset_query(); ?", "> \n\nA:\n\nOk, since we're going the post meta route (as opposed to options), there's a much cleaner and efficient way to grab a post by it's title:\nif ( $info = get_page_by_title( 'Business Info', OBJECT, 'post' ) ) {\n // do stuff\n}\n\nDon't let the page in the function name throw you off - the third argument is the post type (in this case post).", "\nSecondly, let's find out what's actually going on:\nif ( $info = get_page_by_title( 'Business Info', OBJECT, 'post' ) ) {\n echo '<pre>';\n echo esc_html( print_r( get_post_meta( $info->ID ), true ) );\n echo '</pre>';\n} else {\n echo 'Oh no!';", "\n}\n\nReport back with you what you get from the above debugging snippet.", "\n\n" ]

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[ "Q:\n\nHow to space out my websocket updates via RxJS\n\nMy Angular component displays a scoreboard that receives updates via websocket anytime the scoreboard changes. ", "The scoreboard changes anytime any voter submits a ballot. ", "The scoreboard updates could come across the websocket at any interval. ", "My scoreboard's animation takes 1000ms. ", "I would like an RxJS way of being sure that there will always be at least 1000ms between iterations of my tap() operator running so that my animations can run. ", "If a flurry of scoreboard updates come through the socket rapid-fire, I would like to handle this one of two ways: a) The updates queue up and are executed one-by-one every 1000ms. ", "b) Every 1000ms, if there have been any new updates, apply the latest update, and ignore the others.", "\n// Scoreboard updates are coming in via websocket anytime the scoreboard changes.", "\n// The scoreboard changes anytime a voter submits a ballot.", "\nthis.scoreboardService.scoreboardUpdates$\n .pipe(\n tap((scoreboardUpdate: Scoreboard) => {\n // Apply update to the scoreboard\n // Scoreboard animation takes 1000ms to complete\n })\n )\n .subscribe();\n\nA:\n\nYou can try this:\nthis.scoreboardService.scoreboardUpdates$\n .pipe(\n throttleTime(1000),\n tap((scoreboardUpdate: Scoreboard) => {\n // Apply update to the scoreboard\n // Scoreboard animation takes 1000ms to complete\n })\n )\n .subscribe();\n\n" ]

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