Newsgroup: it.scienza.biologia
Titolo: MI5 Persecution: Come back, Norma! (33512)

Private Eye, 23 Oct 1992
Certainty level: 25%
I'm not really sure whether this cover was intended to get at me,
or whether it was re-interpreted after publication to be about me.
This issue of Private Eye came out in October 1992, by which time I had
been under severe continuous pressure at work and from the general
population in Oxford for many months. It had John Major saying to his
wife, "Come back, Norma!" under the title "Major's support lowest ever".
There's a story behind this. In late October I was in the local pub
(the Rose and Crown, nice traditional name eh) with two people from
work, Simon and Phil. Phil had with him a copy of the current Private
Eye. These are both "nice people" and on my side, I hasten to add.
Simon pointed out the message on the magazine's cover to Phil, and asked
"what do you think about that". Phil answered, "Well usually they
[Private Eye] get it right". This exchange happened in front of me.
Although I was ill at the time (this was before I'd started taking
medicines) I hadn't read anything into the Eye cover until these guys
pointed it out to me.
Sometime later, again in the same road, a student shouted to
one of his friends, "so when are you COMING BACK?", again in front
of me.
What I realised Phil thought it meant was a double-entendre, the
"coming" referring to the act of ejaculation, the "back" referring
to the human back-side. So in a play on words you get a person who
is referred to as a back-side ejaculating. Charming.
Of course, Phil could have been wrong. Perhaps there was no such meaning
intended by Private Eye. Perhaps he saw meaning which wasn't there.
Perhaps the moon is made from green cheese. Who knows?
33512
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give the rule
as applied to a particular case; but if we wish to demonstrate a particular
case, we must begin with the general rule. For we always find the thing
obscure which we wish to prove and that clear which we use for the proof;
for, when a thing is put forward to be proved, we first fill ourselves with
the imagination that it is, therefore, obscure and, on the contrary, that
what is to prove it is clear, and so we understand it easily.
41. Epigrams of Martial.--Man loves malice, but not against one-eyed men nor
the unfortunate, but against the fortunate and proud. People are mistaken in
thinking otherwise.
For lust is the source of all our actions, and humanity, etc. We must please
those who have humane and tender feelings. That epigram about two one-eyed
people is worthless, for it does not console them and only gives a point to
the author's glory. All that is only for the sake of the author is
worthless. Ambitiosa recident ornamenta.[4]
42. To call a king "Prince" is pleasing, because it diminishes his rank.
43. Certain authors, speaking of their works, say: "My book," "My
commentary," "My history," etc. They resemble middle-class people who have a
house of their own and always have "My house" on their tongue. They would do
better to say: "Our book," "Our commentary," "Our history," etc., because
there is in them usually more of other people's than their own.
44. Do you wish people to believe good of you? Don't speak.
45. Languages are ciphers, wherein letters are not changed into letters, but
words into words, so that an unknown language is decipherable.
46. A maker of witticisms, a bad character.
47. There are some who speak well and write badly. For the place and the
audience warm them, and draw from their minds more than they think of
without that warmth.
48. When we find words repeate