Newsgroup: it.cultura.single
Titolo: Understanding Engineers

Prima di leggere sotto, giusto che sappiate che un *Engineers* in molti
paesi anglosassoni, non è uno di quei pazzi e particolari e ...(metteteci
quello che volete va sempre bene ... ), Ing. ... delle nostre parti ... di
solito un engineer è un perito, magari iper specializzato, ma sempre un
perito ... anche se ... tutto quello che c'è scritto qua sotto ... non vedo
perché non è associabile anche ai ns Ing.
;oD
===
Understanding Engineers - Take One
Two engineering students were walking across the campus when one said,
"Where did you get such a great bike?" The second engineer replied, "Well, I
was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman
rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her
clothes and said, "Take what you want." The second engineer nodded
approvingly, "Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn't have fit."
Understanding Engineers - Take Two
To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half
empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
Understanding Engineers - Take Three
A priest, a doctor and an engineer were waiting one morning for a
particularly slow group of golfers.The engineer fumed, "What's with these
people? We've been waiting for 15 minutes!"
The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such ineptitude!"
The priest said,
"Hey, here comes the green keeper. Let's have a word with him." "Hi George,
what's the matter that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?"
The green keeper replied, "Oh, yes, that's a group of blind fire-fighters.
They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we
always let them play for free anytime."  The group was silent for a moment.
Then the priest said, "That's so sad. I think I will say a special prayer
for them tonight." The doctor said, "Good idea. And I'm going to contact my
ophthalmologist friend and see if there is anything he can do for them." The
engineer said, "Why can't they play at night?"
Understanding Engineers - Take Four
A man in a hot air balloon realized he was lost. He reduced altitude and
spotted a woman below. He descended a bit more and shouted, "Excuse me, can
you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't
know where I am." The woman below replied, "You are in a hot air balloon
hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You are between 40 and 41
degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude." "You
must be an engineer," said the balloonist. "I am," replied the woman, "How
did you know?" "Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is,
technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your information,
and the fact is I am still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help so far."
The woman below responded, "You must be in Management." "I am," replied the
balloonist, "but how did you know?" "Well," said the woman, "you don't know
where you are or where you are going. You have risen to where you are due to
a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise, which you have no idea how
to keep, and you expect people beneath you to solve your problems. The fact
is you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now,
somehow, it's my fault."
Understanding Engineers - Take Five
What is the difference between Mechanical Engineers and Civil Engineers?
Mechanical Engineers build weapons. Civil Engineers build targets.
Understanding Engineers - Take Six
Normal people ... believe that if it isn't broken, don't fix it.
Engineers believe that if it isn't broken, it doesn't have enough features
yet.
Understanding Engineers - Take Seven
An architect, an artist and an engineer were discussing whether it was
better to spend time with the wife or a mistress. The architect said he
enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring
relationship. The artist said he enjoyed time with his mistress, because of
the passion and mystery he found there. The engineer said, "I like both."
"Both?" Replied the architect and artist.
"Yeah. If you have a wife and a mistress, they will each assume you are
spending time with the other woman, and you can go to the lab and get some
work done."
Understanding Engineers - Take Eight
One day, an engineer was crossing a road when a frog called out to him and
said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess". He bent over,
picked up the frog and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and
said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will
stay with you for one week." The engineer took the frog out of his pocket,
smiled at it and returned it to the pocket. The frog then cried out, "If you
kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you and do ANYTHING
you want." Again the engineer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it
back into his pocket. Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've
told you I'm a beautiful princess, I'll stay with you for a week and do
anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?" The engineer said, "Look. I'm an
engineer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog, now that's
cool."

cool."
http://snurl.com/1cu8
Rob ;-)