Newsgroup: it.sport.arti-marziali
Titolo: 50 ragioni

Chiedo scusa ai non anglofoni, ma non mi andava di tradurre il tutto (in
verita' sono in un inglese un po maccheronico, non so chi le abbia
scritte).
Comunque sia, io le ho trovate esilaranti, e a tratti anche realistiche.
Sai di essere dipendente dalla KickBoxing :
When playfighting with friends you name yourself Sam and your Stan
                2.When your girlfriend falls over you put a count on her
                3.When your girlfriend sways drunkenly you put a
standing count on her
                4.In every family portrait you are seen shaping up or
giving the number
                 one sign
                5.When wearing a hooded top you feel compelled to shadow
box (ditemi che non vi e' mai capitato)
                6.When shopping for a new belt you buy the one that
looks most like a title
                 belt
                7.You think an eight man eliminator would be a great way
to settle the
                 Republican debate
                8.When watching action films you try to pick the Thai
Boxing techniques in
                 the fight scenes
                9.You will only date a girl who does Kickboxercise
classes
               10.You think Andrew Gaze could have been a K1 contender
if he trained in
                 kickboxing
               11.You go to a wedding reception and think it would be a
great venue for a
                 kickboxing show
               12.When doing your hair in the mirror you bob and weave
               13.The rooms in your house are divided by rings and
cornerposts
               14.The message on your answering machine begins with the
words Letąs
                 Get Ready to Ruuuumble!ą
               15.You insist on going to Thailand for a holiday instead
of Bali
               16.You only eat out at Thai restaurants
               17.Instead of stretching when you wake up in the morning
you shadow box
                 your way to the bathroom
               18.When at the gym you look at peopleąs legs to see who
has the biggest
                 thighs to take a leg kick
               19.You start to give all your friends ring names
               20.Instead of playing fetch with your dog, you spar it
               21.When you hear the music from Jawsą you think of Jenk
Behic entering
                 the ring
               22.When youąre exiting a lift and hear the bell you
immediately guard up
               23.You donąt call anyone Mrą because you think there are
too many titles
                 already
               24.You become annoyed when flicking through the newspaper
and not seeing
                 any kickboxing results
               25.You think they should have fight posters at the
National Gallery instead of
                 Picasso
               26.When buying jewellery for your girlfriend, you buy her
a pair of golden
                 boxing glove earings
               27.You canąt go to your sisterąs wedding because there is
a show on that night
               28.You plan your entire social calendar around Tarik
Solakąs next promotion
                 and all FoxSports shows
               29.During games of indoor soccer you leg check your
opponentąs tackles
               30.Instead of wearing gloves during winter you wrap your
hands
               31.You think Master Ishii should open the Olympic Games
and the K1 be a
                 medal sport
               32.You take your girlfriend out for a romantic night at
the kickboxing,
                 followed by the nightclub after-party
               33.You wear a kickboxing showąs T-Shirt five years after
the event
               34.You do everything in five, three minute rounds
               35.When you hear Queenąs ŚWe Will Rock Youą you think of
Ian Jacobs
                 entering the ring
               36.Your video collection contains a copy of every
FoxSports kickboxing
                 broadcast and a range of pirated K1 tapes
               37.When nobody is watching you secretly begin performing
the Ram Muay in
                 your loungeroom
               38.You almost crash your car in a fit of laughter every
time Guido Hatsis
                 makes a kickboxing gag on the radio
               39.You spend hours on kickboxing internet chat sites
thinking of something to
                 say
               40.At university, you write a thesis on the bio-mechanics
of the Thai
                 roundhouse kick
               41.You wear Thai shorts instead of boxer shorts as
underwear
               42.You believe that Thai Boxing liniment oil can cure all
illnesses
               43.You watch Mike Tyson and think to yourself ŚYeah, but
could he take a
                 leg kick!ą
               44.When you hug your grandmother you put her in a Thai
grapple
               45.You hang boxing gloves and Thai lucky charms from your
carąs rear view
                 mirror
               46.When out to dinner with friends you inevitably lead
the conversation to a
                 debate about the outcome of the Longinidis vs Alexio
fight
               47.When your wife falls asleep you sneak out of bed, hook
up the PlayStation
                 and play the K1 game all night trying to win through as
Sam Greco
               48.You believe that Stan Longinidis should have been
named Australian
                 Athlete of the Century ahead of Don Bradman
               49.You search through Queensland trash cans looking for
Scott Bannanąs
                 world title belt
               50.When at the doctorąs surgery, you insist that he
places copies of
                 International Kickboxer and Blitz magazines in the
waiting room.
--
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 Comunque sia, io le ho trovate esilaranti, e a tratti anche realistiche.
Davvero forte!
:-)
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