Newsgroup: it.discussioni.misteri
Titolo: rael & Israel

Is Rael for real?
    A mighty foreign power wants to locate its embassy in Jerusalem.
    And the Israelis aren't interested?!
    The foreign power is warning of "catastrophic consequences on the people
of Israel" if its request is not granted.
    The request comes from God. More correctly, the godlike Creators -- the
"Elohim" -- through their messiah, a French journalist named Rael.
    Y'see, they created us 25,000 years ago in extraterrestrial
laboratories, and they'd like very much to come visit, but they don't want
to kick up a fuss. They want to come in peace -- and they need a place to
stay.
    That's according to the Israeli Raelian Movement in Tel Aviv. They
kindly faxed us a "synopsis of the most Important Message in the History of
Humanity, given to Rael on December 13, 1973, October 7, 1975, and on
December 13, 1997, by our extraterrestrial Creators, the Elohim."
    The gods met with the Frenchman and asked him to mention their message
to all of humanity and in particular, to the people of Israel. Rael has been
traveling around the world for the past 26 years to spread the word.
    For some reason, nobody is taking notice. Certainly not the faithless
Israeli government, which has so far not even bothered to respond to the
gods. Except maybe to roll its eyes heavenward.
    I shouldn't really call them gods. They are -- so they say in their
fax -- beings from another planet who came to Earth and created man in their
image, as well as all forms of life, thanks to their mastery of genetic
engineering.
    And we have not been very appreciative. They sent us Moses, Jesus,
Mohammed, and still we haven't understood. They recalled their prophet,
Eliyahu, in a spaceship; Ezekiel described (chapter 1, verse 1-28) the
landing of one of their crafts. Shouldn't that be enough to convince us?
    "Our prophet Daniel," sayeth the fax, "spoke about the 144,000 who would
have their foreheads sealed, as those who would recognize us, meaning the
Raelians."
    I can think of close to that many who should have their mouths sealed,
but I wish to point out (if the Elohim are reading this) that pretty much
everybody, except for people who've undergone a frontal lobotomy, has a
sealed forehead.
    If you know of a dead Raelian, ask to see his luz. That will prove
everything. The luz is "an imperishable bone that contains all the genetic
information of an individual which can be used to recreate a human being
after his death. In our commandments it is recommended that all those who
recognize us during their lifetime have this bone removed after their
death."
    According to the fax (which was sent from a Tel Aviv phone, and not from
another planet), Rael is the messiah, but all the rabbis I've consulted on
this matter insist the messiah will not speak French, and will certainly not
be a journalist.
    Propheteering is a tricky business, as Rael could tell us. The Masters
of the Universe come to you and say, see here, we exist! Tell all your
friends! But people just don't want to know. Frankly, they're more
interested in the scores from yesterday's games.
    The Elohim are holding out for a snazzy building for their embassy,
specifically the Third Temple, but if the government would only take them
seriously, they'd probably settle for something less. The new Central Bus
Station, for example: the perfect location for a UFO landing pad,
conveniently connecting intergalactic travelers with Egged's.
    I wouldn't doubt a fellow journalist's facts -- if he met with the gods,
who am I to say he didn't? -- but there is one little hole in his story. If
we were made in Their image, we should be just as smart as Them; so why are
our politicians behaving like their foreheads are unsealed?
Fin qui il testo del giornalista israeliano Sam Orbaum. Vorrei richiamare
l'attenzione su questa parte:
 According to the fax (which was sent from a Tel Aviv phone, and not from
another planet), Rael is the messiah, but all the rabbis I've consulted on
this matter insist the messiah will not speak French, and will certainly not
be a journalist.
Traduzione ad uso dei raeliani:
Secondo il fax (che è stato spedito da un telefono di Tel Aviv, e non da un
altro pianeta), rael è il messia, ma tutti i rabbini che ho consultato su
questo argomento sostengono che il messia non parlerà francese, e certamente
non sarà un giornalista.
Ognuno ne tragga le proprie conclusioni.


Ma lascia stare.
Basta leggere il rapporto " An Assessment"
per capire che un fantomatico "rael" non centra
un cacchio nè con la storia degli ufo
nè con la storia di dio.
Mario

 non sarà un giornalista.
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