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I have to deliver the news at 60 miles an hour and if I slow down for even a second something bad might happen to Keanu Reeves. Bradley, don't slow down! He's already sad enough. Apple is apparently going to launch M4 MacBook Pros this year which is what I've been learning from Mark Gurman who lives in a house made from all the paper he's earning. Thank you, Jake. You're welcome, world. But even though Apple hasn't even announced them yet Russian YouTube channel Wilsacom claims to have gotten their hands on one. The channel's video even got a response from Gurman himself saying it's unconfirmed but looks fairly legitimate which I think is the nicest thing he's ever said about anyone. Personally, I'm not sure how much I trust a channel that may have ripped their World Premiere intro from an Xbox event. And by may, I mean definitely. World Premiere. Whether or not the video is legit Gurman claims we'll be seeing M4 MacBook Pros launch on November 1st, alongside new M4 Mac Minis and iMacs. Gurman also revealed that Apple Intelligence will finally arrive on October 28th. Yeah, it's not out yet, despite weeks of ads featuring actor Bella Ramsey using the power of AI to do amazing things like make a photo montage with sad vibes at a fish funeral. I've just had to watch that knowing I can't get that for myself yet. Oh, there's fine print at the bottom? I want sad vibes now! Fortunately, Apple may be trying to prevent weird delays like this as Gurman claims the company is moving away from its usual annual release cycle. Instead, they're going to try a revolutionary new strategy of launching products when they're ready. Wow. Genius. This is why Tim Cook makes the big bucks. Over a third of the web is caught up in a feud between two companies that could perhaps be described as some high school show. Just like teenage grudges it's also fairly complicated but we're here to help you get through it. Matt Mullenweg is the co-founder and owner of the open-source WordPress.org web publishing project which powers around 40% of the top 10 million websites. He's also the CEO of Automattic, which owns WordPress.com, a freemium web-building platform based on WordPress.org. You with us so far? Last month, Automatic sent WP Engine, a third-party WordPress hosting service, a cease-and-desist letter for using the WordPress trademark on their site which Automatic can technically do because it holds the license for the trademark's commercial rights stating WP Engine can't claim they bring WordPress to the masses when they don't contribute enough to the open-source project. WP Engine fired back with their own cease and desist claiming Mullenweg told them he'd take a scorched earth nuclear approach if WP Engine didn't pay 8% of its revenue as a trademark fee to Automatic or dedicate employee time of equivalent financial value to WordPress contribution. In apparent retaliation, Mullenweg banned WP Engine from using WordPress.org servers affecting their customers and breaking a lot of websites. That's what it does. What do you need this for? It's all AI now. Last week, WP Engine also sued Automatic for extortion and 159 Automatic employees accepted a severance package offered to workers who disagreed with Mullenweg's direction of the company. a.k.a. just starting. I probably would have taken it too just so I didn't have to keep trying to explain to my family what's happening at work. No mom, you don't understand. wordpress.org is different from wordpress.com, okay? Microsoft wants you to buy a new computer just to get access to Windows 11. In other news... Water is moist. In an updated support article spotted by Neowin the company is now recommending customers buy a new PC running the operating system rather than install it on their current machines. Some people are taking this to mean that Microsoft is recommending you throw out your old PC. But only because that's a direct consequence of what Microsoft is telling people to do. The only curse in this story are the Windows 11 system requirements, which still controversially necessitate a TPM 2.0 security chip. Though it's kind of ironic that because of that requirement millions of incompatible PCs will become unsecured. But hey, it's not all bad news. Microsoft will let you reprogram the new co-pilot key they started adding to laptops this year. Thanks to Microsoft for solving the problem they themselves created. Is there anything they can't do that I like? Growing up, uh, My mom told me I'd never get to host Quick Bits if I didn't eat my broccoli. And look at me now. Thanks, mom. Following its most recent microcode update Intel says that it's finally fixed the root cause of the instability in its Raptor Lake CPUs, and this time, They mean it. Intel has confirmed that V-min shift instability resulting in excessive voltage is at the heart of the problem something it was previously kind of cagey about. While Intel says their future chips won't be affected by this issue there's still no fixing the chips that are already damaged and no way of telling that a chip is damaged until it starts crashing. Intel is apparently working on developing such a diagnostic tool for that situation. But in the meantime I don't know enable autosave in your Word doc, you crazy adrenaline junkie. What are you doing? Living on the edge, okay. Japanese peripheral manufacturer, Elecom, has become the first company to get cable certified for USB 4 2.0. As fun as it is that it ended up being named USB 4 20 USB 4 2 is kind of dumb. Fortunately, the specs are far less stupid than the name. There are two cables with certifications. While they both are capable of 80 gigabits per second data transfer speeds one of them is also capable of 240 watts power delivery. The other delivers a more modest 60 watt. The USB-IF, who governs the USB standard said the cables will launch at the end of this year. But they also named the new standard USB 4 2.0. And I don't know if I can trust people like that. USB 4 2.0. Blaze it. Now with blazing fast speeds. An unusual number of M1 iMac users are reporting phantom lines appearing on their displays which is either screen degradation or this summer's hot new thriller. This has been a known issue since mid-2023 but Apple has yet to acknowledge the problem. This not-so-fashionable pinstripe pattern typically crops up after two years of use meaning that the device is already well out of warranty. Which is a real bummer in an expensive all-in-one device where you can't just buy a new monitor. At least one repair tech blamed the issue on a flex cable used to power the LCD gradually burning out. Replacing it typically means replacing the entire screen which costs about as much as an entire Mac Mini. And you couldn't even buy one of those instead because that doesn't have a display either! Scientists created an artificial plant that generates oxygen and electricity using photosynthetic bacteria. Wow. Mitochondria! Don't cut that. Mitochondria! While the energy output is currently less than one milliwatt researchers hope to increase it to more than a milliwatt. And add something like a battery to store the energy for later use. Right now it's just they're just pouring it down the drain. It just escapes in the air. They're just extra. According to the paper the artificial plant was nine times better than natural plants at reducing indoor CO2 level. Unfortunately for everyone, the plant is really ugly. Or at least it was before it took off its glasses and let its hair down. Let's get into some hybridization, baby. And Jason Allen, a man who won an art competition two years ago with an image generated using MidJourney, is appealing the U.S. Copyright Office's denial of copyright for his image. Why? Well, Allen thinks the question of AI art copyright needs answering. And he's kind of right there. But he's also upset that the lack of copyright gives his work a perceived lower value. And it's even been appropriated and sold without his permission. Kind of like the countless images that were appropriated and used to train Midjourney and other art generators. Guys, he's not making enough money from the picture the computer gave him. What is he supposed to do? Ask it for another picture? They all changed the rules already! My fingers are tired! Now you make sure you come back here on Wednesday. That's how long we have to wait before we can ask the computer for more tech news. And even then it might just be a lot of stuff about knockoff AirPods, you know. We just kind of got to see what we get. |