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@TinyRainSpirit: There are so many tv shows that have never been shown in theaters but still sound like their audio is mixed specifically for that
@PhilipGreenbriar: The assumption here is that the audio should be mixed in a way that works for every at home tv setup, but there’s no standardization. Different brands, different tv speakers. Plus, you’re asking 5+ channels of sound to be played simultaneously through 2 channels and have it mixed in a way that sounds good.
@Undeity: Still, would it really be that difficult to provide an in-app equalizer setting? Even if there's no standardization on the production or user end, the distributors are filtering everything through their own software to get it to the table. There are bound to be internal values for volume that can be regulated across the board.
@PhilipGreenbriar: An equalizer will only do so much to compensate. It’s like saying most people use crappy $15 earbuds so musicians should mix their music for crappy headphones. When you use a pair of good quality headphones or speakers for the first time, the near-universal reaction is “wow I’m hearing sounds for the first time in this song that I’ve listened to hundreds of times.”
@burkeymonster: As someone who mixes music I can say that you have to mix to account for most people listening on cheap.cesply headphones.
When I mix to my good ones it then sounds terrible on cheaper ones so I then have to remaster it so it sounds good on crappy head phones, shitty phone speakers, pointless Bluetooth speakers and all the other feeble excuses people listen on.
@low_rent_hipster: I read once that Jack White had a old crappy car outside his studio so he could see how tracks would sound in real life, not just how they sound on high-end studio headphones.
@Salieri: | This has been a common rule for mixing since forever. Mix some, burn to cd or mp3 it and then go blast it through your car. |
@TinyRainSpirit: There are so many tv shows that have never been shown in theaters but still sound like their audio is mixed specifically for that
@PhilipGreenbriar: The assumption here is that the audio should be mixed in a way that works for every at home tv setup, but there’s no standardization. Different brands, different tv speakers. Plus, you’re asking 5+ channels of sound to be played simultaneously through 2 channels and have it mixed in a way that sounds good.
@Undeity: Still, would it really be that difficult to provide an in-app equalizer setting? Even if there's no standardization on the production or user end, the distributors are filtering everything through their own software to get it to the table. There are bound to be internal values for volume that can be regulated across the board.
@PhilipGreenbriar: An equalizer will only do so much to compensate. It’s like saying most people use crappy $15 earbuds so musicians should mix their music for crappy headphones. When you use a pair of good quality headphones or speakers for the first time, the near-universal reaction is “wow I’m hearing sounds for the first time in this song that I’ve listened to hundreds of times.”
@burkeymonster: As someone who mixes music I can say that you have to mix to account for most people listening on cheap.cesply headphones.
When I mix to my good ones it then sounds terrible on cheaper ones so I then have to remaster it so it sounds good on crappy head phones, shitty phone speakers, pointless Bluetooth speakers and all the other feeble excuses people listen on.
@Salieri: | Taking them into account and mixing for them are two different things, though.
I’m sure that they test movie and tv audio on all sorts of things, but that doesn’t mean that everyone is going to have a great at-home reproduction of that audio. |
@TinyRainSpirit: There are so many tv shows that have never been shown in theaters but still sound like their audio is mixed specifically for that
@PhilipGreenbriar: The assumption here is that the audio should be mixed in a way that works for every at home tv setup, but there’s no standardization. Different brands, different tv speakers. Plus, you’re asking 5+ channels of sound to be played simultaneously through 2 channels and have it mixed in a way that sounds good.
@Undeity: Still, would it really be that difficult to provide an in-app equalizer setting? Even if there's no standardization on the production or user end, the distributors are filtering everything through their own software to get it to the table. There are bound to be internal values for volume that can be regulated across the board.
@PhilipGreenbriar: An equalizer will only do so much to compensate. It’s like saying most people use crappy $15 earbuds so musicians should mix their music for crappy headphones. When you use a pair of good quality headphones or speakers for the first time, the near-universal reaction is “wow I’m hearing sounds for the first time in this song that I’ve listened to hundreds of times.”
@Salieri: | Maybe, but it doesn't have to be anything more than an option in the settings. Though, it's not like an equalizer has to bring everything to a single average point, either. It can be adjusted to compress the audio from all channels into an acceptable range of volume instead. |
@TinyRainSpirit: There are so many tv shows that have never been shown in theaters but still sound like their audio is mixed specifically for that
@PhilipGreenbriar: The assumption here is that the audio should be mixed in a way that works for every at home tv setup, but there’s no standardization. Different brands, different tv speakers. Plus, you’re asking 5+ channels of sound to be played simultaneously through 2 channels and have it mixed in a way that sounds good.
@Undeity: Still, would it really be that difficult to provide an in-app equalizer setting? Even if there's no standardization on the production or user end, the distributors are filtering everything through their own software to get it to the table. There are bound to be internal values for volume that can be regulated across the board.
@PhilipGreenbriar: An equalizer will only do so much to compensate. It’s like saying most people use crappy $15 earbuds so musicians should mix their music for crappy headphones. When you use a pair of good quality headphones or speakers for the first time, the near-universal reaction is “wow I’m hearing sounds for the first time in this song that I’ve listened to hundreds of times.”
@Salieri: | Most people do mix their music for shitty earbuds, among everything else they can test it on. |
@TinyRainSpirit: There are so many tv shows that have never been shown in theaters but still sound like their audio is mixed specifically for that
@PhilipGreenbriar: The assumption here is that the audio should be mixed in a way that works for every at home tv setup, but there’s no standardization. Different brands, different tv speakers. Plus, you’re asking 5+ channels of sound to be played simultaneously through 2 channels and have it mixed in a way that sounds good.
@Undeity: Still, would it really be that difficult to provide an in-app equalizer setting? Even if there's no standardization on the production or user end, the distributors are filtering everything through their own software to get it to the table. There are bound to be internal values for volume that can be regulated across the board.
@Salieri: | Sound direction is a part of editing the movie. They can do A, or B. But both costs more money.
They're already going to put it in movie theaters with surround. |
@TinyRainSpirit: There are so many tv shows that have never been shown in theaters but still sound like their audio is mixed specifically for that
@PhilipGreenbriar: The assumption here is that the audio should be mixed in a way that works for every at home tv setup, but there’s no standardization. Different brands, different tv speakers. Plus, you’re asking 5+ channels of sound to be played simultaneously through 2 channels and have it mixed in a way that sounds good.
@KenJyi30: I dont think this is the issue, everyone seems to have the same complaints which makes me think there is some sort of consistency happening. Also commercials are not having the voices lost in the music or sound effects why should that be the case in high production shows and movies
@bpowell4939: It's mixing for the best setups and not the standard setups. I.e. 5/7.1 Dolby. Tvs don't come with the best speakers, you can only for so much in. 75 inches of TV depth
@KenJyi30: That probably explains it but it’s also nonsensical since streaming is not the last word in high fidelity. That makes as much sense as 4-foot tall speed bumps only monster trucks can scale on the freeway
@bpowell4939: Sure, but most tvs are made with the thought that every one is going to updraft their sound system
@Salieri: | To a $25,000 surround-sound system built into a blacked-out acoustically isolated room in a new house custom designed by an audiophile? Kind of a dumb assumption. |
@TinyRainSpirit: There are so many tv shows that have never been shown in theaters but still sound like their audio is mixed specifically for that
@PhilipGreenbriar: The assumption here is that the audio should be mixed in a way that works for every at home tv setup, but there’s no standardization. Different brands, different tv speakers. Plus, you’re asking 5+ channels of sound to be played simultaneously through 2 channels and have it mixed in a way that sounds good.
@KenJyi30: I dont think this is the issue, everyone seems to have the same complaints which makes me think there is some sort of consistency happening. Also commercials are not having the voices lost in the music or sound effects why should that be the case in high production shows and movies
@Salieri: | At this point I'm certain it's just a shitty movie thing. I got my wife to watch Inception and we ended up having to turn on subtitles because the sound was so fucking loud it was actually shaking our cabinet during loud scenes but we were unable to hear what they were saying properly.
By contrast we watched The Godfather two days later and I started with subs on and turned them off after the first few lines of dialogue. Didn't need to adjust the volume at all, not during shooting or quiet scenes. |
@TinyRainSpirit: There are so many tv shows that have never been shown in theaters but still sound like their audio is mixed specifically for that
@PhilipGreenbriar: The assumption here is that the audio should be mixed in a way that works for every at home tv setup, but there’s no standardization. Different brands, different tv speakers. Plus, you’re asking 5+ channels of sound to be played simultaneously through 2 channels and have it mixed in a way that sounds good.
@KenJyi30: I dont think this is the issue, everyone seems to have the same complaints which makes me think there is some sort of consistency happening. Also commercials are not having the voices lost in the music or sound effects why should that be the case in high production shows and movies
@PhilipGreenbriar: The consistency is low-quality speakers with a small soundstage which makes complex noise hard to get across. Commercials don’t often include such high contrast in their audio and you don’t have music, foley, and voices competing in the same way. It’s an interesting comparison but it’s apples and oranges.
@Salieri: | In the US the commercial's audio mixer will put the sound through a compressor and bring up the sound to the maximum decibels allowed by law. The audio equivalent of having the Kool Aid man burst your speakers. |
@TinyRainSpirit: There are so many tv shows that have never been shown in theaters but still sound like their audio is mixed specifically for that
@PhilipGreenbriar: The assumption here is that the audio should be mixed in a way that works for every at home tv setup, but there’s no standardization. Different brands, different tv speakers. Plus, you’re asking 5+ channels of sound to be played simultaneously through 2 channels and have it mixed in a way that sounds good.
@KenJyi30: I dont think this is the issue, everyone seems to have the same complaints which makes me think there is some sort of consistency happening. Also commercials are not having the voices lost in the music or sound effects why should that be the case in high production shows and movies
@PhilipGreenbriar: The consistency is low-quality speakers with a small soundstage which makes complex noise hard to get across. Commercials don’t often include such high contrast in their audio and you don’t have music, foley, and voices competing in the same way. It’s an interesting comparison but it’s apples and oranges.
@Salieri: | Sort of, I’m just saying it could be done but it seems like they’re ruining the experience for 99.9% of users for the benefit of the 0.1% |
@TinyRainSpirit: There are so many tv shows that have never been shown in theaters but still sound like their audio is mixed specifically for that
@PhilipGreenbriar: The assumption here is that the audio should be mixed in a way that works for every at home tv setup, but there’s no standardization. Different brands, different tv speakers. Plus, you’re asking 5+ channels of sound to be played simultaneously through 2 channels and have it mixed in a way that sounds good.
@KenJyi30: I dont think this is the issue, everyone seems to have the same complaints which makes me think there is some sort of consistency happening. Also commercials are not having the voices lost in the music or sound effects why should that be the case in high production shows and movies
@PhilipGreenbriar: The consistency is low-quality speakers with a small soundstage which makes complex noise hard to get across. Commercials don’t often include such high contrast in their audio and you don’t have music, foley, and voices competing in the same way. It’s an interesting comparison but it’s apples and oranges.
@Salieri: | speakers with a small soundstage which makes complex noise hard to get across.
Sound is sound. The only difference between quality speakers and shitty ones is range. They cannot reproduce the lows or the highs.
All thats needed is a highpass filter for the lows, or even saturation. Saturating creates higher harmonics that fools us into hearing low frequencies that arent there. This is how you can still hear bass/kickdrums playing on a phone speaker. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@Vesk123: Yeah that's probably it. It doesn't really seem to be a problem in theaters, but at home it really is to the point where so many times I just have to use headphones, even though there is no one around. They really should just mix movies differently for non-theatre releases.
@Thalizar: The last film I saw in theatres was Tenet and that had some of the worst mixing I've ever experienced. Honestly awful even for a theatre experience. Cool film though
@Salieri: | Omg that movie... they're was a handful of people in theater for Tenet when I went and it started off so fkng loud the was a collective "whoa!" and "too loud!" from the audience. Thankfully someone finally got up to have the employee turn the volume down. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@Vesk123: Yeah that's probably it. It doesn't really seem to be a problem in theaters, but at home it really is to the point where so many times I just have to use headphones, even though there is no one around. They really should just mix movies differently for non-theatre releases.
@Thalizar: The last film I saw in theatres was Tenet and that had some of the worst mixing I've ever experienced. Honestly awful even for a theatre experience. Cool film though
@stonemite: See, I heard the complaints about the sound in Tenet before I went and saw it, but honestly I found it completely fine at the cinema I went to.
So I don't know how it could be the sound mixing of the film. The cinema I saw it in was pretty new though, so maybe newer speakers vs older speakers? I also heard that the scenes with the plane were unbearably loud, but again I didn't find that to be the case. Weird.
@DeaJaye: I do agree that the dynamic range is a bit obnoxious in a lot of movies, nolan films included, but the way people are carrying on I really do think it has to come down to ragged ass speakers in the setups they’re being watched in.
@stonemite: The more I read this thread, the more I'm seeing that when it comes to bad cinema experiences the reality is the the volume is simply too loud. If they're turning up the volume it's probably because the speakers are old/dying and that's the only way they can keep voices (and whatever range of frequency that's screwed) audible.
Again, my experiences in a newer cinema are completely different than those complaining.
@Salieri: | Also. My friend works as a Hollywood producer, and nearly every movie he goes to see he has to have it stopped, talk to the manager and threaten to open a lawsuit against them as they aren’t playing it to the specified level of brightness that came on the reel. They do this to save money. Everyone then left with free tickets. I thought the movie was fine, but when we saw it again under his forced modifications it was night and day. Everything just looked, better. Felt like a different movie.
He does this All the time. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@Vesk123: Yeah that's probably it. It doesn't really seem to be a problem in theaters, but at home it really is to the point where so many times I just have to use headphones, even though there is no one around. They really should just mix movies differently for non-theatre releases.
@Thalizar: The last film I saw in theatres was Tenet and that had some of the worst mixing I've ever experienced. Honestly awful even for a theatre experience. Cool film though
@stonemite: See, I heard the complaints about the sound in Tenet before I went and saw it, but honestly I found it completely fine at the cinema I went to.
So I don't know how it could be the sound mixing of the film. The cinema I saw it in was pretty new though, so maybe newer speakers vs older speakers? I also heard that the scenes with the plane were unbearably loud, but again I didn't find that to be the case. Weird.
@DeaJaye: I do agree that the dynamic range is a bit obnoxious in a lot of movies, nolan films included, but the way people are carrying on I really do think it has to come down to ragged ass speakers in the setups they’re being watched in.
@stonemite: The more I read this thread, the more I'm seeing that when it comes to bad cinema experiences the reality is the the volume is simply too loud. If they're turning up the volume it's probably because the speakers are old/dying and that's the only way they can keep voices (and whatever range of frequency that's screwed) audible.
Again, my experiences in a newer cinema are completely different than those complaining.
@Salieri: | If they're turning up the volume it's probably because the speakers are old/dying and that's the only way they can keep voices
Speakers dont work that way. They dont degrade till they suddenly stop working. They work or dont. If the cone or driver is damaged you will know it straight away as well. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@Vesk123: Yeah that's probably it. It doesn't really seem to be a problem in theaters, but at home it really is to the point where so many times I just have to use headphones, even though there is no one around. They really should just mix movies differently for non-theatre releases.
@Thalizar: The last film I saw in theatres was Tenet and that had some of the worst mixing I've ever experienced. Honestly awful even for a theatre experience. Cool film though
@stonemite: See, I heard the complaints about the sound in Tenet before I went and saw it, but honestly I found it completely fine at the cinema I went to.
So I don't know how it could be the sound mixing of the film. The cinema I saw it in was pretty new though, so maybe newer speakers vs older speakers? I also heard that the scenes with the plane were unbearably loud, but again I didn't find that to be the case. Weird.
@DeaJaye: I do agree that the dynamic range is a bit obnoxious in a lot of movies, nolan films included, but the way people are carrying on I really do think it has to come down to ragged ass speakers in the setups they’re being watched in.
@stonemite: The more I read this thread, the more I'm seeing that when it comes to bad cinema experiences the reality is the the volume is simply too loud. If they're turning up the volume it's probably because the speakers are old/dying and that's the only way they can keep voices (and whatever range of frequency that's screwed) audible.
Again, my experiences in a newer cinema are completely different than those complaining.
@DeaJaye: Yeah, it would be nice if the takeaway is “don’t go to haggard theatres” more than “movies are shit”, but I guess theres room for subjective opinion in it as well. I am probably quite fortunate to have decent speakers, and have new theatres nearby.
@Salieri: | Dude, I'm in the same boat. When I bought a Plasma TV many, many years ago, Samsung had an offer going where for $50 and proof of purchase they'd send you a surround sound setup. It's still going strong and works a treat, though I have thought occasionally about upgrading. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@Vesk123: Yeah that's probably it. It doesn't really seem to be a problem in theaters, but at home it really is to the point where so many times I just have to use headphones, even though there is no one around. They really should just mix movies differently for non-theatre releases.
@Thalizar: The last film I saw in theatres was Tenet and that had some of the worst mixing I've ever experienced. Honestly awful even for a theatre experience. Cool film though
@stonemite: See, I heard the complaints about the sound in Tenet before I went and saw it, but honestly I found it completely fine at the cinema I went to.
So I don't know how it could be the sound mixing of the film. The cinema I saw it in was pretty new though, so maybe newer speakers vs older speakers? I also heard that the scenes with the plane were unbearably loud, but again I didn't find that to be the case. Weird.
@DeaJaye: I do agree that the dynamic range is a bit obnoxious in a lot of movies, nolan films included, but the way people are carrying on I really do think it has to come down to ragged ass speakers in the setups they’re being watched in.
@Salieri: | Is it ragged ass speakers, or is it the sound designers not taking into account real world scenarios? Not everything needs to have
#MAXIMUM
dynamic
dynamic
range. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@Vesk123: Yeah that's probably it. It doesn't really seem to be a problem in theaters, but at home it really is to the point where so many times I just have to use headphones, even though there is no one around. They really should just mix movies differently for non-theatre releases.
@Salieri: | There are ways to fix it at home, but by and large the industry wants people to buy better setups, so a hard thing to argue either way.
I'm really lucky to have found a decent speaker setup at goodwill, and it makes a huge difference... but there's no way I would've dropped the money on these at retail, so I absolutely understand.
There's a reason I'm the host for the group, though, heh |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@Vesk123: Yeah that's probably it. It doesn't really seem to be a problem in theaters, but at home it really is to the point where so many times I just have to use headphones, even though there is no one around. They really should just mix movies differently for non-theatre releases.
@peelen: but at home...
Because in theatres they know what they dealing with. There are few standards and that's it. In homes they need to deal with laptops speakers, headphones, build in speakers stand alone stereo, stero with subwoofer, dolby, 5.1, 7.1, and flatmate that needs to study for exam so "not too loud, please". All of that means that at some set ups sound will be shitty.
I'm pretty sure that those who have designated "cinema centres" in their houses with good sound system do not complain as much.
@burkeymonster: Well I've got a Bose surround sound my TV goes through down stairs and I just have whatever is built into my TV upstairs and I would say I have to adjust the surround sound volume more than I do when I'm watching upstairs.
@Salieri: | Turn up your center channel speaker. That's where 99% of dialog comes from. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@shadysamonthelamb: They should remix the audio for streaming and home release. It wouldn't even be that difficult.
@SeivardenVendaai: They do.
You are not hearing the theater mix when you play a bluray or watch it on streaming.
Some directors (Christopher Nolan, for example) are just assholes and do this on purpose.
@Salieri: | “Hrnnhrnddnrhrrd hrrdhrnn hrrrhdhrn hhhrd”
- Every Christopher Nolan character, talking in a mask |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@shadysamonthelamb: They should remix the audio for streaming and home release. It wouldn't even be that difficult.
@Salieri: | It isn’t. You save the audio “raw” (no mastering) create 3/4 different versions with different mastering for different speaker setups. If home producers can do this for music, the fucking production company should be able to as well. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@nilsma231: Imo, it isn't really better in theaters because they turn it up so much - it really is borderline tinnitus cause.
I full-on stopped going to cinemas for this reason.
I don't think I know anyone who appreciates it. But maybe I'm just old.
@osmosisheart: Yeah. I wear earplugs to movies so the effect is the same as hearing it at home - can't hear shit when ppl talk but the action scenes are disturbingly loud and will fuck my ears up without plugs in.
I don't get it how anyone can enjoy that tbh
@Trevski: do you just wear regular earplugs? try a pair of musician earplugs or filtering earplugs, I bought mine when I was working in a bar. They let vocal sounds come through more clearly, but still muffle loud noises and put a physical barrier between your inner ear and the sonic shockwave like any other earplug. Great for concerts, lets the vocals come through way better since everyone has to turn their instrument to 11 all the time.
@osmosisheart: What a great tip, thank you!
@Salieri: | I have a pair of Eargasms for band practice and concerts. At concerts, I can hear people clearly only half again as loud as normal speech. They are awesome. I've had them for 7 years now. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@nilsma231: Imo, it isn't really better in theaters because they turn it up so much - it really is borderline tinnitus cause.
I full-on stopped going to cinemas for this reason.
I don't think I know anyone who appreciates it. But maybe I'm just old.
@Salieri: | This was explained to me as the sound technicians get hearing damage over time, so eventually they start turning the sounds up too high. Happens in theatre a lot too, especially with musicals. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@nilsma231: Imo, it isn't really better in theaters because they turn it up so much - it really is borderline tinnitus cause.
I full-on stopped going to cinemas for this reason.
I don't think I know anyone who appreciates it. But maybe I'm just old.
@Salieri: | That’s also one of the main reasons I stopped going to theaters. Just cannot do it, especially for that price. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@nilsma231: Imo, it isn't really better in theaters because they turn it up so much - it really is borderline tinnitus cause.
I full-on stopped going to cinemas for this reason.
I don't think I know anyone who appreciates it. But maybe I'm just old.
@Salieri: | Yeah I started wearing the little foam ear plugs to theaters and it's much better. The past few movies I saw (like almost 2 years ago lol) were absurdly loud. When I saw the last star wars movie it was almost painful. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@nilsma231: Imo, it isn't really better in theaters because they turn it up so much - it really is borderline tinnitus cause.
I full-on stopped going to cinemas for this reason.
I don't think I know anyone who appreciates it. But maybe I'm just old.
@ToTheTopFloor: I'm going to start bringing ear plugs but only put them in half ways so it just blocks out some of the notice. Because WOW are they loud in cinemas. Not pleasant at all.
@Salieri: | Get a pair of filtering earplugs. They are useful for a bunch of scenarios. They dampen the loudness without sacrificing clarity. I wear them to concerts, movies, band practice, mowing the lawn, with the chainsaw, etc. Mine are called Eargasms. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@nilsma231: Imo, it isn't really better in theaters because they turn it up so much - it really is borderline tinnitus cause.
I full-on stopped going to cinemas for this reason.
I don't think I know anyone who appreciates it. But maybe I'm just old.
@Salieri: | Same! My ears seem to hurt more and more as they raise the volume |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@nilsma231: Imo, it isn't really better in theaters because they turn it up so much - it really is borderline tinnitus cause.
I full-on stopped going to cinemas for this reason.
I don't think I know anyone who appreciates it. But maybe I'm just old.
@Salieri: | Yup there need to be laws to keep it at levels that don't cause harm long term. So many people are hard of hearing by age 40. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@boo29may: The theathers are also ridiculous loud... I feel like the difference is the same but you don't have to worry about your neighbours complaining of the noise level.
I honestly started hating going to the cinema because the explosions etc really hurt my ears
@Salieri: | Disposable earplugs are a lifesaver. You can put them in only lightly and they'll dampen the sound enough that it's no longer painful to sit through. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@boo29may: The theathers are also ridiculous loud... I feel like the difference is the same but you don't have to worry about your neighbours complaining of the noise level.
I honestly started hating going to the cinema because the explosions etc really hurt my ears
@Salieri: | Saw John Wick 2 in the theatre. Hands down the loudest gunshot effects I've ever heard. It was legitimately painful. One of the reasons I stopped going to the theatre. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@boo29may: The theathers are also ridiculous loud... I feel like the difference is the same but you don't have to worry about your neighbours complaining of the noise level.
I honestly started hating going to the cinema because the explosions etc really hurt my ears
@Salieri: | Yeah, I don't know why, but it gotten significantly louder in the last decade, nowadays I can only go to the cinema with earplugs, which really hurts the experience. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@boo29may: The theathers are also ridiculous loud... I feel like the difference is the same but you don't have to worry about your neighbours complaining of the noise level.
I honestly started hating going to the cinema because the explosions etc really hurt my ears
@Salieri: | Batman v. Superman stood out to me. My ears felt like they were bleeding afterwards. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@Salieri: | It's sounds just as awful in theaters, to me, only it's 100x worse because the volume is 100+ decibels during action scenes (too loud for anything but music you enjoy), and maybe as low as 60ish during the quiet parts. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@Pollo_Jack: Like they can't mix for both.
@Salieri: | They do, downmix from 7.1/5.1/stereo usualtereo usually. But they monitor with good stereo speakers not headphones. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@Salieri: | With the obscene budgets that go into movies these days, you would think that they could remaster the audio for small screen releases. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@Jay-Bleezy: They mix them for theater set ups and home theater set ups. They don’t mix them for people’s shitty tv speakers that most people still use.
@Salieri: | It happens in theaters too though, legit had plenty of times at a movie where the background noise is practically deafening and the characters' audio is drowned out by it. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@Salieri: | It’s not just a different type of speaker though. Theaters can get away with ridiculously loud audio where as that’s not as great for home viewers |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@Salieri: | Sounds really lazy |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@Salieri: | Yeah, but you don't have to have a full theater screen at home to watch it, shouldn't need a theater sound system to hear it either. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@Salieri: | It's just as bad in theaters though, so that doesn't really make sense.
I don't even remember what movie it was because it was so annoying, but I was in a theater shortly before the pandemic, could barely understand the characters speaking, and was nearly deafened by the CRINKLE CRINKLE SHUFFLE CRINKLE of two characters' shopping bags drowning out the dialogue.
Like, I legitimately could not hear the characters speak over it.
I'd blame different mixes if it were just when streaming or watching on a home stereo or whatever, but when it happens at the theater itself too, it's just bad audio work by the actual production team. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@Salieri: | Fuck everyone not watching the movie in the few months it is in theatre I guess |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@scullys_alien_baby: From my understanding it’s because they mix volumes for theater speakers which is different than home theater set ups.
It’s still stupid though
@hackingdreams: It's not really stupid, it's just not great for home users basically. In the theater you really need to full send an explosion to sell it as being a thing... they've tested it and it's one of the things that makes action movies feel like action movies. Movies with better dynamic range sell better, period.
The problem is that everyone's gotten really, really used to media not having dynamic range, and nobody's home setups are equipped to deal with theater mixes that include a lot of it. The MP3 generation got used to the fact that musicians try to cram in every ounce of sound with compression, murdering the dynamic range of most music, and because of that, so followed televisions and home speaker systems.
So now that we are in need of it again... nobody knows how to deal with it. We could ask movie companies to compress the hell out of the audio and make flatter mixes for home markets... or we could adjust our consumption to deal with dynamic range compression, by simply adding a tiny piece of software or hardware between the audio source and the speakers that adjusts the range to fit your current needs...
...sadly, I can't imagine most people reading any of this and thinking anything but 'too hard, just buy the shittier sounding product.' After all, that's how we started importing everything.
@Salieri: | It happens in theaters, too, mate. I've been to several movies where the characters' dialogue was drowned out by background noise. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@Cygnusaurus: Get a 5.1 setup, and raise the center channel volume. That way the dialogue will usually be higher than FX volume.
@redditloginfail: That's one way but most people i know don't have a setup with speakers all around them. Doesn't fit well into most living rooms.
@Salieri: | A soundbar is a good compromise. Even inexpensive ones are MUCH better than the built in TV speakers. Everything will sound so much better and you'll be able to hear most dialog again at normal volume levels.
(To be honest, it still surprises me that people buy huge TVs but then spend $0 on the audio part of the setup. TV speakers have only gotten worse over time because of how thin TVs are now, there's just physically no room for decent speakers in them.) |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@Cygnusaurus: Get a 5.1 setup, and raise the center channel volume. That way the dialogue will usually be higher than FX volume.
@redditloginfail: That's one way but most people i know don't have a setup with speakers all around them. Doesn't fit well into most living rooms.
@gueriLLaPunK: Even small speakers would make a huge difference. Also you don't have to put rears if you don't have the room.
Even a 3.1 system would be infinitely better than your TV speakers.
@Salieri: | I have a 7 channel setup and the right/left and center speakers do 99% of the work. The few times a movie has good surround mixing is really cool but it's rare. The center channel for dialogue is by far the best part of any setup. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@Cygnusaurus: Get a 5.1 setup, and raise the center channel volume. That way the dialogue will usually be higher than FX volume.
@Salieri: | I don't want that. I just want to use my tv. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@iFlyAllTheTime: Fewer
@Salieri: | moren't |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@iFlyAllTheTime: Fewer
@el_tedward: Stannis, we’ve talked about this.
@_SerPounce_: It brings me immense joy to know that this meme is still alive and well.
@Salieri: | I literally was going to reply this, decided to open this comment because it was hidden behind "load more," saw your username, and my immense joy doubled. A round of chickens for everyone. |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@iFlyAllTheTime: Fewer
@Salieri: | I mean, if they're turning it off after 5 minutes then it's less |
@redditloginfail: I hear this a lot. Everyone seems to hate it, me included. But they keep doing it. I also want to hear the dialog and not just read it. Takes me out of the moment. So i just watch less movies. Good job hollywood.
@iFlyAllTheTime: Fewer
@delicious_downvotes: Not everyone has access to that education. Not everyone cares to apply perfect grammar to an internet comment.
If you want to be helpful, an explanation might be warranted, assuming someone never learned this. If you want to be pedantic and uphold classist rules on a website for literally everyone, keep leaving comments like this.
@iFlyAllTheTime: It's referencing what a character from game of Thrones,(Stannis) says. I just find it funny every time I watch scenes where he says that. That's all.
Agree with your comment in its entirety, but I'm not trying to be elitist or expect him to fix the error.
@Salieri: | Cool, cool. I like Stannis the Mannis. Thanks for clarifying. |
@BlaquKnite: Seriously. The sound balancers of pretty much every movie and show in the last 5+ years need to be fired.
On the same token fk who ever makes commercials 5 times louder than the show they are in.
@BlargTheElder: This is happening with podcasts now. Like, I've got earbuds in. Blowing out my eardrums is only going to make me skip your ads faster.
@segwayistheway: Grumpy rant upcoming, humor me. I've listened to podcasts since I got my first ipod in 2008. Loved it. I'm happy that the medium started getting popular because that meant more good things to listen to, but now there is SO MUCH GARBAGE that finding a new podcast is extremely hard since you have to sift through all of the mindless babble that makes the charts because skill-less til tok/youtube stars have a built in audience that will download anything with their name. Plus the ads are dumber now too, not only more frequent. I feel like there's some sort of rush to appeal to the lowest common denominator that of course is motivated by the new influx of ad money.
@Salieri: | I agree completely. The only new podcasts I listen to are from interviews I like, or recommendations from trusted friends.
I've listened to so many on a whim ands it's just two guys or girls with terrible candor, cussing and talking about random things with no format. |
@BlaquKnite: Seriously. The sound balancers of pretty much every movie and show in the last 5+ years need to be fired.
On the same token fk who ever makes commercials 5 times louder than the show they are in.
@BlargTheElder: This is happening with podcasts now. Like, I've got earbuds in. Blowing out my eardrums is only going to make me skip your ads faster.
@im_a_dr_not_: Unrelated, but has anyone noticed on podcasts with celebrities who have celebrity guests on, they praise each other way way too much? Almost like they made a pact before hand to praise the other when they're praised, like "hey I'd praise myself like crazy but I know people will hate that so if you do it for me I'll do it for you."
@Salieri: | Well that circle isn’t going to jerk itself now is it |
@BlaquKnite: Seriously. The sound balancers of pretty much every movie and show in the last 5+ years need to be fired.
On the same token fk who ever makes commercials 5 times louder than the show they are in.
@BlargTheElder: This is happening with podcasts now. Like, I've got earbuds in. Blowing out my eardrums is only going to make me skip your ads faster.
@Salieri: | YouTube as well, fuck I wish they would just set a universal standard decibel for their audio slider, I like to watch it when I go to bed and you'll go from barely being able to hear, to ear rape between two videos and it's incredibly infuriating |
@BlaquKnite: Seriously. The sound balancers of pretty much every movie and show in the last 5+ years need to be fired.
On the same token fk who ever makes commercials 5 times louder than the show they are in.
@WiseMenFear: It’s so that you can hear them* from the kitchen
*the adverts
@Salieri: | It's so your neighbors can hear them from the kitchen. |
@ZugTheMegasaurus: I had the exact same problem, couldn't hear dialogue even like 2 feet away from the TV but the sound effects were so loud I was worried my downstairs neighbors would hear it. Turns out my TV has an audio setting for "Clear Voice" that's surprisingly effective; you might see if yours has something similar (I'd bet there are programs that could do this for a computer too if that's what you're using).
@PSquared1234: There is also something called "night mode" on some AVRs (not mine, alas), which compresses the dynamic range (the range between the loudest and softest sounds) provided to the speakers. It won't help one distinguish the vocals from the soundtrack / effects, but it will at least decrease the times one has to quickly find the remote and turn down the volume.
@Salieri: | I have a dedicated rack mount compressor just for this purpose. The dynamic range on Netflix is absurd. |
@ZugTheMegasaurus: I had the exact same problem, couldn't hear dialogue even like 2 feet away from the TV but the sound effects were so loud I was worried my downstairs neighbors would hear it. Turns out my TV has an audio setting for "Clear Voice" that's surprisingly effective; you might see if yours has something similar (I'd bet there are programs that could do this for a computer too if that's what you're using).
@Salieri: | Excitedly grabbed my remote to search out this feature...... It's already on "high" |
@Carpaltunnelsnake: Or streaming services with shows that are normal volume with ads that are brain rapingly loud.
I'm looking at you Hulu, you Betamax ass motherfucker. You're going to the technology graveyard directly.
@GerudoGreen: That's why I think there should be a minimum and maximum volume setting. Like let us decide the range of volume so it can't get louder than a certain level.
@Salieri: | Completely. In fact, if one tv advertised a software volume compensator feature for annoying volume stuff I'd pay a stupid premium for that. It seems like a solvable problem. |
@Carpaltunnelsnake: Or streaming services with shows that are normal volume with ads that are brain rapingly loud.
I'm looking at you Hulu, you Betamax ass motherfucker. You're going to the technology graveyard directly.
@Whatever0788: I fucking hate Hulu because of this. I have to keep the remote in my hand at all times in preparation for the second the loud ass commercials start so I can hurry up and hit the mute button. And there’s zero chance in hell I’m paying these assholes extra money to remove the commercials either. Seriously considering dropping the service because of it.
@Carpaltunnelsnake: Oh yeah. I keep telling myself I will cancel because its unwatchable, but forget to. Tomorrow is the day tho. I just have too many other better tv options.
@Salieri: | My Hulu is free through my cell carrier and if it wasn’t I wouldn’t be a Hulu customer. |
@Carpaltunnelsnake: Or streaming services with shows that are normal volume with ads that are brain rapingly loud.
I'm looking at you Hulu, you Betamax ass motherfucker. You're going to the technology graveyard directly.
@Whatever0788: I fucking hate Hulu because of this. I have to keep the remote in my hand at all times in preparation for the second the loud ass commercials start so I can hurry up and hit the mute button. And there’s zero chance in hell I’m paying these assholes extra money to remove the commercials either. Seriously considering dropping the service because of it.
@Salieri: | I used to have to problem too, but at some point it stopped doing it. I almost don't have a problem with ads being loud unless I have the volume turned up trying to hear the dialogue. |
@Molly_dog88888888: Something that also annoys me is when a show is barely audible, but then the commercial break comes on and it’s deafeningly loud. Like, I get that they have to be louder to grab your attention, but does it have to be THAT much louder?
@DrummerBound: Ikr, that's so annoying. We need a new technology to let us chose to equalize ALL sounds. Holy shit this is bigger than I thought
@gamebuster: This technology already exists and has existed for half a century. It’s called “loudness” or “normalization”. Your TV or amp or speakers might have a setting like that. Some hifi amps even have a physical knob to adjust it.
Modern systems also call it “evening mode” or something like that
@DrummerBound: I have something called Night Mode on my soundbar, it does practically nothing.
@Salieri: | That probably just dims the display |
@Molly_dog88888888: Something that also annoys me is when a show is barely audible, but then the commercial break comes on and it’s deafeningly loud. Like, I get that they have to be louder to grab your attention, but does it have to be THAT much louder?
@DrummerBound: Ikr, that's so annoying. We need a new technology to let us chose to equalize ALL sounds. Holy shit this is bigger than I thought
@gamebuster: This technology already exists and has existed for half a century. It’s called “loudness” or “normalization”. Your TV or amp or speakers might have a setting like that. Some hifi amps even have a physical knob to adjust it.
Modern systems also call it “evening mode” or something like that
@Salieri: | On some devices, it even does the job! |
@Molly_dog88888888: Something that also annoys me is when a show is barely audible, but then the commercial break comes on and it’s deafeningly loud. Like, I get that they have to be louder to grab your attention, but does it have to be THAT much louder?
@DrummerBound: Ikr, that's so annoying. We need a new technology to let us chose to equalize ALL sounds. Holy shit this is bigger than I thought
@gamebuster: This technology already exists and has existed for half a century. It’s called “loudness” or “normalization”. Your TV or amp or speakers might have a setting like that. Some hifi amps even have a physical knob to adjust it.
Modern systems also call it “evening mode” or something like that
@Salieri: | Yep, I have that on my Samsung sound bar - they call it "smart volume".
I found it's the difference between the kids waking up when we're watching a Marvel film vs them staying sound asleep. |
@peach_dragon: This is why I put the subtitles on.
@Salieri: | I can't even watch TV without them anymore, I thought I was going a very specific deaf in which I can't understand people talk but my eardrums get blown off with the sound, I'm so glad I'm not alone! |
@Earthboom: This is a speaker problem. Movies audio is very complex these days to offer the viewer a cinematic experience. On proper speakers capable of handling the tech, the dialogue will appear normal. On a stereo system, or on shitty speakers, the audio gets compressed and flattened and dialogue gets lost.
There are settings on your TV to help out with dialogue issues including an equalizer if things are particularly bad.
@DrummerBound: Yeah, I don't have either the budget or time (motivation) to learn about audio engineering.
I just want an explosion to be equalized to like, a loud voice. I'd still be able to hear what it was, I don't need an actual explosion through my speakers.
I'm just complaining, I know there are fixes. I've tried in the past, but my TV and/or soundbar just can't make the changes I want.
@Salieri: | You can try switching between 5.1 and stereo audio as well. Sometimes one sounds clearer than the other, depending on the hardware. |
@Earthboom: This is a speaker problem. Movies audio is very complex these days to offer the viewer a cinematic experience. On proper speakers capable of handling the tech, the dialogue will appear normal. On a stereo system, or on shitty speakers, the audio gets compressed and flattened and dialogue gets lost.
There are settings on your TV to help out with dialogue issues including an equalizer if things are particularly bad.
@Salieri: | More so a mastering problem. Such movies are usually terribly mastered |
@Earthboom: This is a speaker problem. Movies audio is very complex these days to offer the viewer a cinematic experience. On proper speakers capable of handling the tech, the dialogue will appear normal. On a stereo system, or on shitty speakers, the audio gets compressed and flattened and dialogue gets lost.
There are settings on your TV to help out with dialogue issues including an equalizer if things are particularly bad.
@Salieri: | Nah, even in cinemas the sound is too loud. |
@squishchef: Subtitles?
I usually have my movies down real low with subtitles on
@DrummerBound: Nah I wanna hear the movie, minor details like a public phone ringing in the distance and chatter in the background.
But then suddenly A CAR FLIPS OVER AND EXPLODES.
It annoys me so damn much.
@Salieri: | Yeah that’s fair, I guess I just don’t care as much about minor details. I do agree though, those sudden bursts of sound are the worst |
@NukaBro762: thats some movie stuff right there, my bully turned into a friend too but he didnt cry, the person you mention probablly went through some emotional wreck and feels who-knows-how-high levels of bad.
People can change, things do make people change
@quizonmyface: My high school bully and I met at someone's party one year after high school. He told me about his constant depression and how he was essentially suicidal throughout all of high school. He apologized that day and since then we've been pretty close friends. We even went on a road trip together pre-pandemic.
In a lot of cases (but not all) there's a reason they act that way.
@QuestioningEspecialy: Yeah, but to be clear, there's also a reason why people abuse in general. Explanations are great to have, but they ain't no excuse.
@tunnelbrat: Hurt people hurt people
@QuestioningEspecialy: Usually true, but it ain't no excuse.
@YoTeach92: but it ain't no excuse.
I had a great conversation with a student the other day about the difference between reasons and excuses. A reason is why someone did it, but they're still responsible for it. An excuse is saying they're not responsible. Reasons are NOT excuses.
@Salieri: | Had this conversation once in college when my roommate’s drunk friend, attempting to find a bathroom, walked silently into my room at like 3:00 am and peed on a nightstand mistaking it for a urinal.
“I don’t care if the reason was confusion or voluntary intoxication, one of you had better clean this up.”
Ah, those bright college days, the shortest gladdest years of life, how swiftly do you glide by. |
@NukaBro762: thats some movie stuff right there, my bully turned into a friend too but he didnt cry, the person you mention probablly went through some emotional wreck and feels who-knows-how-high levels of bad.
People can change, things do make people change
@quizonmyface: My high school bully and I met at someone's party one year after high school. He told me about his constant depression and how he was essentially suicidal throughout all of high school. He apologized that day and since then we've been pretty close friends. We even went on a road trip together pre-pandemic.
In a lot of cases (but not all) there's a reason they act that way.
@QuestioningEspecialy: Yeah, but to be clear, there's also a reason why people abuse in general. Explanations are great to have, but they ain't no excuse.
@tunnelbrat: Hurt people hurt people
@QuestioningEspecialy: Usually true, but it ain't no excuse.
@YoTeach92: but it ain't no excuse.
I had a great conversation with a student the other day about the difference between reasons and excuses. A reason is why someone did it, but they're still responsible for it. An excuse is saying they're not responsible. Reasons are NOT excuses.
@Salieri: | I always like to think that when people explain why they did something they shouldn’t, they aren’t making an excuse for doing it, they’re simply trying to give you an explanation as to why. |
@NukaBro762: thats some movie stuff right there, my bully turned into a friend too but he didnt cry, the person you mention probablly went through some emotional wreck and feels who-knows-how-high levels of bad.
People can change, things do make people change
@quizonmyface: My high school bully and I met at someone's party one year after high school. He told me about his constant depression and how he was essentially suicidal throughout all of high school. He apologized that day and since then we've been pretty close friends. We even went on a road trip together pre-pandemic.
In a lot of cases (but not all) there's a reason they act that way.
@QuestioningEspecialy: Yeah, but to be clear, there's also a reason why people abuse in general. Explanations are great to have, but they ain't no excuse.
@tunnelbrat: Hurt people hurt people
@QuestioningEspecialy: Usually true, but it ain't no excuse.
@yoyononon: I get what you're saying but more often than not these bully's are kids that haven't been taught/ have the emotional intelligence to know any difference.
@Salieri: | Yes, this. Exactly. There are many kids who are depressed and do NOT hurt others, because they were taught empathy. No empathy + bad feelings about self OR extremely high above average self esteem. Those are a couple recipes for a bully. And they have lack of empathy in common. |
@NukaBro762: thats some movie stuff right there, my bully turned into a friend too but he didnt cry, the person you mention probablly went through some emotional wreck and feels who-knows-how-high levels of bad.
People can change, things do make people change
@quizonmyface: My high school bully and I met at someone's party one year after high school. He told me about his constant depression and how he was essentially suicidal throughout all of high school. He apologized that day and since then we've been pretty close friends. We even went on a road trip together pre-pandemic.
In a lot of cases (but not all) there's a reason they act that way.
@QuestioningEspecialy: Yeah, but to be clear, there's also a reason why people abuse in general. Explanations are great to have, but they ain't no excuse.
@Salieri: | I absolutely agree. I think explanations are important, though, because while they don't change the action, they can absolutely provide info that tells you how bad the person is. Either way, they weren't a good person, but a bully who bullies purely for fun is definitely worse than a bully who bullies to let out, say, the stress they feel from abuse they're experiencing at home. And the second one is much more likely to feel bad and change for the better than the first one. |
@NukaBro762: thats some movie stuff right there, my bully turned into a friend too but he didnt cry, the person you mention probablly went through some emotional wreck and feels who-knows-how-high levels of bad.
People can change, things do make people change
@quizonmyface: My high school bully and I met at someone's party one year after high school. He told me about his constant depression and how he was essentially suicidal throughout all of high school. He apologized that day and since then we've been pretty close friends. We even went on a road trip together pre-pandemic.
In a lot of cases (but not all) there's a reason they act that way.
@QuestioningEspecialy: Yeah, but to be clear, there's also a reason why people abuse in general. Explanations are great to have, but they ain't no excuse.
@Salieri: | When I was growing up(7yo in 1988, as far as I can remember), my mom would say over and over, "how would you feel if that happened to you?" I think that's a key question when it comes to helping a kid develop emotional intelligence. I grew up in the 80s though, so I couldn't watch any movie with a bully in it without getting upset. Back to the future was scary and some other movies were traumatic. |
@NukaBro762: thats some movie stuff right there, my bully turned into a friend too but he didnt cry, the person you mention probablly went through some emotional wreck and feels who-knows-how-high levels of bad.
People can change, things do make people change
@Salieri: | My bully's been in prison for the last 10 years, not sure when he is getting out. |
@NukaBro762: thats some movie stuff right there, my bully turned into a friend too but he didnt cry, the person you mention probablly went through some emotional wreck and feels who-knows-how-high levels of bad.
People can change, things do make people change
@Few_Assistant_9954: Got in a fight (full fist fight for no reason) with someone we became frinds a few days later.
@Salieri: | That’s a very weird and common guy thing. |
@NukaBro762: thats some movie stuff right there, my bully turned into a friend too but he didnt cry, the person you mention probablly went through some emotional wreck and feels who-knows-how-high levels of bad.
People can change, things do make people change
@Salieri: | Yeah, as a former school bully I've done this a lot over the years. It sucks, but generally everyone comes out if it happier. |
@NukaBro762: thats some movie stuff right there, my bully turned into a friend too but he didnt cry, the person you mention probablly went through some emotional wreck and feels who-knows-how-high levels of bad.
People can change, things do make people change
@wtfduud: With the bully working as a barrista in their 30s, too. Very movie.
@Salieri: | Steady on bro. A job's a job. Times are tough. |
@NukaBro762: thats some movie stuff right there, my bully turned into a friend too but he didnt cry, the person you mention probablly went through some emotional wreck and feels who-knows-how-high levels of bad.
People can change, things do make people change
@wtfduud: With the bully working as a barrista in their 30s, too. Very movie.
@Willing_Function: Work is work man, gotta respect it.
@Salieri: | The working class is the backbone of America why people put them down astounds me. I’ll bow to the maids to the janitors to the ones that take the trash away. If you find yourself putting people down because of the jobs they do you need to check yourself |
@NukaBro762: thats some movie stuff right there, my bully turned into a friend too but he didnt cry, the person you mention probablly went through some emotional wreck and feels who-knows-how-high levels of bad.
People can change, things do make people change
@wtfduud: With the bully working as a barrista in their 30s, too. Very movie.
@Salieri: | If you consider "barista" a job that one 'ages out of", and others agreed with you, I think we'd very quickly find Starbucks' hours changing to 4pm-8pm every day.
We need to stop shitting on positions. I don't find janitorial, barista, or any other position demeaning. What's demeaning is the pay for the amount of work expected. What's demeaning is this attitude by the public and managers. What's demeaning is applying for food stamps because as hard as you look, and as hard as you are willing to work, you still can't tie ends together because companies refuse to give hours so they won't have to pay benefits.
As someone in her 30s I apparently have the authority to tell you that your comment has mad bully vibes.
Everyone deserves fair compensation for their work. Whether they are 16, 26, 36, or 106. If you do a job, you should be paid properly for your time and effort. |
@NukaBro762: thats some movie stuff right there, my bully turned into a friend too but he didnt cry, the person you mention probablly went through some emotional wreck and feels who-knows-how-high levels of bad.
People can change, things do make people change
@wtfduud: With the bully working as a barrista in their 30s, too. Very movie.
@Salieri: | Genuine question, what’s up with working as a barista in your 30s? Why is that looked down on? |
@NukaBro762: thats some movie stuff right there, my bully turned into a friend too but he didnt cry, the person you mention probablly went through some emotional wreck and feels who-knows-how-high levels of bad.
People can change, things do make people change
@wtfduud: With the bully working as a barrista in their 30s, too. Very movie.
@Salieri: | Nothing wrong with being a barista, coffee is great |
@NukaBro762: thats some movie stuff right there, my bully turned into a friend too but he didnt cry, the person you mention probablly went through some emotional wreck and feels who-knows-how-high levels of bad.
People can change, things do make people change
@wtfduud: With the bully working as a barrista in their 30s, too. Very movie.
@Salieri: | Idk where you live, but there are tons of cafes where I live, with a whole lot of baristas anywhere from literally 30-60. It's so normal I would never even think about their age. Heck, there's even a barista I was served by a lot a few years ago who was like 75 lol. |
@NukaBro762: thats some movie stuff right there, my bully turned into a friend too but he didnt cry, the person you mention probablly went through some emotional wreck and feels who-knows-how-high levels of bad.
People can change, things do make people change
@wtfduud: With the bully working as a barrista in their 30s, too. Very movie.
@iro_sarcastic: Very dhar mann
@Salieri: | Dog I was thinking the same thing |
@NukaBro762: thats some movie stuff right there, my bully turned into a friend too but he didnt cry, the person you mention probablly went through some emotional wreck and feels who-knows-how-high levels of bad.
People can change, things do make people change
@wtfduud: With the bully working as a barrista in their 30s, too. Very movie.
@iro_sarcastic: Very dhar mann
@Salieri: | So you see... |
@NukaBro762: thats some movie stuff right there, my bully turned into a friend too but he didnt cry, the person you mention probablly went through some emotional wreck and feels who-knows-how-high levels of bad.
People can change, things do make people change
@wtfduud: With the bully working as a barrista in their 30s, too. Very movie.
@Salieri: | Roll tape. Marty McFly … |
@NukaBro762: thats some movie stuff right there, my bully turned into a friend too but he didnt cry, the person you mention probablly went through some emotional wreck and feels who-knows-how-high levels of bad.
People can change, things do make people change
@wtfduud: With the bully working as a barrista in their 30s, too. Very movie.
@Salieri: | Pretty sure everyone working at my local coffee shop is in their 30s and over. This isn’t the 1950’s anymore, these are the jobs people do |
@vancityguy25: That’s so nice that she apologised and actually felt bad for what she did. People can and do change.
I got bullied by so many guys in school, a lot of them have not really changed and I wouldn’t give them the time of day, but others have and made an effort with me in recent years to genuinely wish me well, they have good jobs and families and matured. The others didn’t, they still think immature shit is funny that schoolboys would.
@sunkized: Most of my bullies were women. Sorry you had to deal with that.
@Salieri: | Me too dude. Primarily my sister. |
@vancityguy25: That’s so nice that she apologised and actually felt bad for what she did. People can and do change.
I got bullied by so many guys in school, a lot of them have not really changed and I wouldn’t give them the time of day, but others have and made an effort with me in recent years to genuinely wish me well, they have good jobs and families and matured. The others didn’t, they still think immature shit is funny that schoolboys would.
@sunkized: Most of my bullies were women. Sorry you had to deal with that.
@Salieri: | Yeah i dont think i had a single male bully ever? if anything when it came to other males i was the bully. However god did i get bullied by girls and i don't think i ever really shook it. |
@vancityguy25: That’s so nice that she apologised and actually felt bad for what she did. People can and do change.
I got bullied by so many guys in school, a lot of them have not really changed and I wouldn’t give them the time of day, but others have and made an effort with me in recent years to genuinely wish me well, they have good jobs and families and matured. The others didn’t, they still think immature shit is funny that schoolboys would.
@mrsegraves: I didn't really get bullied in high school, but elementary school and middle school (the worst) were full of bullies. Of all of them, I've only had 1 apologize, and he did it during a graduation party. Dude tormented me for pretty much all of 6th and 7th grade. He approached me at the party and, even though I hadn't seen him in a while, I was prepared for some bullshit. That isn't what I got. He asked if we could walk over by this tree, a little bit away from people, but still where everyone could see us. He started with something along the lines of, "Man, I'm so sorry for everything I did to you back then. I won't ever be able to make up for it. Not asking you to forgive me, don't expect us to magically become friends. My life was pretty terrible at home, but don't take that as an excuse. I'm sorry, and I hope you have a great time in college." I didn't really know what to say then, but I wish I'd at least said thank you. I was too shocked in the moment to really say anything. Haven't seen him since.
@Salieri: | That dude has self awareness and empathy. |
@vancityguy25: That’s so nice that she apologised and actually felt bad for what she did. People can and do change.
I got bullied by so many guys in school, a lot of them have not really changed and I wouldn’t give them the time of day, but others have and made an effort with me in recent years to genuinely wish me well, they have good jobs and families and matured. The others didn’t, they still think immature shit is funny that schoolboys would.
@Salieri: | Ive had two bullies apologize to me. The first was I actually met him because my neighbors were his parents. The parents invited me to a bbq and I was quite surprised to see him. We played some Cornhole and he apologized for his behavior during high school. It seemed legit and I accepted. We had some small talk during the bbq. The second was a concert for a local band. This girl who bullied me in middle school with her clique and friends saw me at the concert and apologized, and started to cry. We hugged I told her that it's ok and while it sucked then we both grew up to for the better and I accepted that apology. We caught up a little bit and listened to the music and it was a fun night. I'll be seeing that band again this weekend I wonder if I'll see her again, it's been over 2 1/2 years since that show and I haven't seen that band again since I can't wait!! |
@OGWhiz: People do change. I remember standing at a bar a few years ago and a guy from high school was looking at me and I thought fuck, here we go again. He bought me a beer and apologized for being such a dick to me growing up.
Two years ago, I was at a fundraiser and I ran into a guy that I went to high school with and worked with for a brief period of time. I was awful to him. Being a shitty teenager with zero culture, I used homophobic slurs towards him, knowing that he was gay but not open about it. Thinking back to it, I wish I could go back and beat the shit out of myself. I apologized to him, and told him about how I had grown. We interact on Facebook now here and there. I’m glad I’m not that person anymore.
@LayAnEggGingerBird: This is why I don’t get the justice boner everyone else gets when a shitty 16/17/18 year olds get dragged across the internet for doing something stupid.
If my life had been recorded when I was 17, you’d hear some homophobic, casual racist bullshit from me. It’s all I knew and was surrounded with.
Then I left my bubble of ignorance and realize how insanely stupid and shitty I was.
@Salieri: | Hell, I’m not the same person I was even four years ago. I’ve grown a lot. It seems people don’t allow that to happen now. |
@OGWhiz: People do change. I remember standing at a bar a few years ago and a guy from high school was looking at me and I thought fuck, here we go again. He bought me a beer and apologized for being such a dick to me growing up.
Two years ago, I was at a fundraiser and I ran into a guy that I went to high school with and worked with for a brief period of time. I was awful to him. Being a shitty teenager with zero culture, I used homophobic slurs towards him, knowing that he was gay but not open about it. Thinking back to it, I wish I could go back and beat the shit out of myself. I apologized to him, and told him about how I had grown. We interact on Facebook now here and there. I’m glad I’m not that person anymore.
@LayAnEggGingerBird: This is why I don’t get the justice boner everyone else gets when a shitty 16/17/18 year olds get dragged across the internet for doing something stupid.
If my life had been recorded when I was 17, you’d hear some homophobic, casual racist bullshit from me. It’s all I knew and was surrounded with.
Then I left my bubble of ignorance and realize how insanely stupid and shitty I was.
@photodelights: Societal norms change and what was acceptable then isn’t now. But people still do the same things, they just change words.
I used to play Warcraft III a lot as a teen and we’d say that stuff all the time. Now? It’s all of us 20 and 30 year olds now asking each other how everyone is. It’s surreal.
@Salieri: | Also fun to see the different methods of interactions that take place in online games, due to life experience and age (although jt can turn horribly if there isnt enough differences... as in everyone being toxic or reinforcing a behavior) |
@OGWhiz: People do change. I remember standing at a bar a few years ago and a guy from high school was looking at me and I thought fuck, here we go again. He bought me a beer and apologized for being such a dick to me growing up.
Two years ago, I was at a fundraiser and I ran into a guy that I went to high school with and worked with for a brief period of time. I was awful to him. Being a shitty teenager with zero culture, I used homophobic slurs towards him, knowing that he was gay but not open about it. Thinking back to it, I wish I could go back and beat the shit out of myself. I apologized to him, and told him about how I had grown. We interact on Facebook now here and there. I’m glad I’m not that person anymore.
@Salieri: | That's awesome OG! |
@OGWhiz: People do change. I remember standing at a bar a few years ago and a guy from high school was looking at me and I thought fuck, here we go again. He bought me a beer and apologized for being such a dick to me growing up.
Two years ago, I was at a fundraiser and I ran into a guy that I went to high school with and worked with for a brief period of time. I was awful to him. Being a shitty teenager with zero culture, I used homophobic slurs towards him, knowing that he was gay but not open about it. Thinking back to it, I wish I could go back and beat the shit out of myself. I apologized to him, and told him about how I had grown. We interact on Facebook now here and there. I’m glad I’m not that person anymore.
@Salieri: | I was a bit of a bully in middle school to one person in our friend group, never anything like that but just being an asshole and belittling, trying to antagonize, and humiliate him. I was such a cliche, the biggest and strongest boy in school realizing that I was attracted to men and basically projecting what I hated about myself.
I've felt so guilty about that for years and still do. I ran into him at a mall during the holidays when I was in my hometown a few years ago, and he was just really happy to see me and wanted to catch up. I kinda wanted to apologize but didn't even know what to apologize for on the spot. Then I saw him later in the week at a bar and I said sorry for being such an asshole, and he was like yeah we all figured out what was going on with you a few years after middle school. And felt bad about using homophobic slurs all the time (it was early 2000s) |
@OGWhiz: People do change. I remember standing at a bar a few years ago and a guy from high school was looking at me and I thought fuck, here we go again. He bought me a beer and apologized for being such a dick to me growing up.
Two years ago, I was at a fundraiser and I ran into a guy that I went to high school with and worked with for a brief period of time. I was awful to him. Being a shitty teenager with zero culture, I used homophobic slurs towards him, knowing that he was gay but not open about it. Thinking back to it, I wish I could go back and beat the shit out of myself. I apologized to him, and told him about how I had grown. We interact on Facebook now here and there. I’m glad I’m not that person anymore.
@Salieri: | Same I was a shitty teenager. I was bullied but I'm sure I bullied. I'm sure I made people feel small because I was feeling small. I used to be angry. Fight first, talk never. I'm not that person anymore and I'm still haunted by my past self |
@TrustedChimp495: I was bullied by one guy who was the popular kid so everyone else inadvertently bullied me as well by enabling him, he made me admit to doing things i never did that was his way of bullying me. I graduated from gr.8 and went to a high school an hour and half away to insure i wasn't going to see any of them again (plus i actually like the school) fast forward 4 years one night i broke down and started crying to my mom telling her i never did any of the things he made me say i did she was confused as it was 4 years ago but comforted me anyways telling me she knew i never did those thing. To make a long story short some scars caused by bullying run deep enough to still bother you years later
@Salieri: | I totally relate |
@TrustedChimp495: I was bullied by one guy who was the popular kid so everyone else inadvertently bullied me as well by enabling him, he made me admit to doing things i never did that was his way of bullying me. I graduated from gr.8 and went to a high school an hour and half away to insure i wasn't going to see any of them again (plus i actually like the school) fast forward 4 years one night i broke down and started crying to my mom telling her i never did any of the things he made me say i did she was confused as it was 4 years ago but comforted me anyways telling me she knew i never did those thing. To make a long story short some scars caused by bullying run deep enough to still bother you years later
@CatAteMyBread: Some scars run deep. The sooner you let go the better, sure, but that doesn’t make it any easier to let go.
I’ve noticed I’m much happier since getting out of school, especially when I remember I keep in close contact with about 3 people. That doesn’t mean the scars are gone, but I am better than I was before.
@Salieri: | I've been out of school for like half my life. And I got one friend from third grade I still know and it's awesome. Got a couple more friends I can rely on. Then it just becomes friends of friends. And that's good enough for me. I'll never forget my childhood and school and bullying, because it was practically every day and their was very little good stuff to remember about school. But that's over and I'm wasn't going to carry a chip on my shoulder because some people who aren't in my life anymore. Fuck that, live free. |
@Remarkable-Ant3571: My worst bully (very bad times for me) showed up 20 years later, doing a crack/street prostitute danctreet prostitute dance near my house. I didn't feel better, but I understood more.
Also, I have a house...it gets better.
@Salieri: | I think I know her! Lol |
@Remarkable-Ant3571: My worst bully (very bad times for me) showed up 20 years later, doing a crack/street prostitute danctreet prostitute dance near my house. I didn't feel better, but I understood more.
Also, I have a house...it gets better.
@Salieri: | Yep, unfortunately both of the people who were jerks to me and others in school are or have been in jail. They both grew up in a low income district full of dilapidated homes and wandering addicts, next to the landfill in town. Wish I understood what they were going through at the time. |
@Remarkable-Ant3571: My worst bully (very bad times for me) showed up 20 years later, doing a crack/street prostitute danctreet prostitute dance near my house. I didn't feel better, but I understood more.
Also, I have a house...it gets better.
@Salieri: | Dude my bullies from the hood I would never go around. I'll get robbed. |
@Remarkable-Ant3571: My worst bully (very bad times for me) showed up 20 years later, doing a crack/street prostitute danctreet prostitute dance near my house. I didn't feel better, but I understood more.
Also, I have a house...it gets better.
@Salieri: | I didn't feel better, but I understood more.
This quote right here is true so many times |
@CityoftheMoon17: I was in the same year group as my now sister-in-law. We were not in the same friends group and I wouldn't say she was a bully but I can definitely recall a few times she was really fucking rude to me or my friends. Well, now that she's married my brother, the people in her friends group that were bullies to me, I see at social gatherings. Some of them have changed and I would now call them friends. Some of them roll their eyes at me and still whisper about me behind my back. My SIL tells me the stupid shit these women say and how they always bring up high school even though it's been almost 15 years since we graduated. For some people, it never gets better than high school and that's why they stay the same. For others, we learn and grow and thrive.
@Amcnallyjnr: Wait? So, is your SIL still friends with these childish bellends?
@CityoftheMoon17: Yes. We grew up in a small town and she still lives there. She has a lot of association with said bellends from work to sports or community groups and I only have to see them every now and then. She's stuck in a spot that since they were mates in high school, it's harder for her to break away from a dwindling friendship since they are always around but I don't think she would even call them friends anymore either. Does that make sense? My SIL has grown into a kind and friendly person after high school and doesn't think much of who these people are now. I think she will enjoy calling them childish bellends from now on thanks!
@Amcnallyjnr: Yeah, that does make sense. My sister is very much the same with her friend group. Been friends since 5-6 years old. Large group. However, each of them only like a certain number within the group. In no way would I consider them all ‘friends’
@CityoftheMoon17: Yea friends would be a very loose term in both these cases by the sounds of it! I think it's really interesting that some people who have stayed in small towns hold onto the high school mentality. I don't know if it's different for people who move away (certainly in my instance). But my sister commented that a lot of these people have kids now and are already pitting them against others to make sure they are more popular or cool or just better than other kids. So odd.
@Salieri: | Friends of convenience/proximity. |
@CityoftheMoon17: I was in the same year group as my now sister-in-law. We were not in the same friends group and I wouldn't say she was a bully but I can definitely recall a few times she was really fucking rude to me or my friends. Well, now that she's married my brother, the people in her friends group that were bullies to me, I see at social gatherings. Some of them have changed and I would now call them friends. Some of them roll their eyes at me and still whisper about me behind my back. My SIL tells me the stupid shit these women say and how they always bring up high school even though it's been almost 15 years since we graduated. For some people, it never gets better than high school and that's why they stay the same. For others, we learn and grow and thrive.
@Salieri: | Great point! |
@CityoftheMoon17: I was in the same year group as my now sister-in-law. We were not in the same friends group and I wouldn't say she was a bully but I can definitely recall a few times she was really fucking rude to me or my friends. Well, now that she's married my brother, the people in her friends group that were bullies to me, I see at social gatherings. Some of them have changed and I would now call them friends. Some of them roll their eyes at me and still whisper about me behind my back. My SIL tells me the stupid shit these women say and how they always bring up high school even though it's been almost 15 years since we graduated. For some people, it never gets better than high school and that's why they stay the same. For others, we learn and grow and thrive.
@Salieri: | My SIL tells me the stupid shit these women say and how they always bring up high school even though it's been almost 15 years since we graduated.
I absolutely cannot understand this at all. It has not even been 15 years since I graduated high school and it feels like an eternity away. So much stuff has happened since then that has been way more important to my life. |