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programmerhumor | MuddyMustache | rpojpb | <|sols|><|sot|>I have been attacked.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/D7smfwb.jpg<|eol|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 84,494 |
programmerhumor | Machiavvelli3060 | hq5d8h9 | <|sols|><|sot|>I have been attacked.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/D7smfwb.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Techs don't buy clothes; they just change employers and get promotional clothing.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 6,167 |
programmerhumor | Lavatis | hq5k1ue | <|sols|><|sot|>I have been attacked.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/D7smfwb.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I mean my clothes don't make my back hurt, shitty chairs do.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 4,143 |
programmerhumor | Denseflea | hq5i3n5 | <|sols|><|sot|>I have been attacked.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/D7smfwb.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Sooo, I can't wear my Google Wave 2009 launch shirt anymore?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 2,676 |
programmerhumor | sonofslackerboy | hq5e173 | <|sols|><|sot|>I have been attacked.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/D7smfwb.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I do all my clothes shopping at tech conventions<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 2,141 |
programmerhumor | Ceros007 | hq5fwko | <|sols|><|sot|>I have been attacked.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/D7smfwb.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Techs don't buy clothes; they just change employers and get promotional clothing.<|eor|><|sor|>You guys get promotional stuff?
Where I work they created a boutique where you literally have to buy their propaganda stuff...<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,596 |
programmerhumor | minequack | hq5lryd | <|sols|><|sot|>I have been attacked.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/D7smfwb.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Sooo, I can't wear my Google Wave 2009 launch shirt anymore?<|eor|><|sor|>You shouldnt wear a collectors item.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,312 |
programmerhumor | Full-Run4124 | hq60u30 | <|sols|><|sot|>I have been attacked.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/D7smfwb.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>The computer and chair are for myself. I wear clothes while coding for the benefit of other people.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 905 |
programmerhumor | justsubscribed912 | hq5gurd | <|sols|><|sot|>I have been attacked.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/D7smfwb.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I don't see a problem here<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 860 |
programmerhumor | caleblbaker | hq5fzor | <|sols|><|sot|>I have been attacked.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/D7smfwb.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I do all my clothes shopping at tech conventions<|eor|><|sor|>Did you really find pants here ? Or you choose to no wear any ?<|eor|><|sor|>If you work from home then you don't need pants. Just don't suddenly stand up during video meetings.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 678 |
programmerhumor | Machiavvelli3060 | hq5g4p1 | <|sols|><|sot|>I have been attacked.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/D7smfwb.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Techs don't buy clothes; they just change employers and get promotional clothing.<|eor|><|sor|>You guys get promotional stuff?
Where I work they created a boutique where you literally have to buy their propaganda stuff...<|eor|><|sor|>Usually they give you free promotional shizznit. Then only place I worked for that offered a boutique and did not provide a thing free was NASA.
EDIT: Yes, maybe that's because they are a government agency.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 603 |
programmerhumor | NNXMp8Kg | hq5euj1 | <|sols|><|sot|>I have been attacked.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/D7smfwb.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I do all my clothes shopping at tech conventions<|eor|><|sor|>Did you really find pants here ? Or you choose to no wear any ?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 563 |
programmerhumor | CyberiusT | hq5harb | <|sols|><|sot|>I have been attacked.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/D7smfwb.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>My 20y.o. shirt fits exactly how I want it to. It should too - I stretched it enough. :p
Gotta admit, it's...er, a bit light on for actual fabric in some spots, though.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 461 |
programmerhumor | DollarAkshay | hq5rqfl | <|sols|><|sot|>I have been attacked.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/D7smfwb.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I don't see a problem here<|eor|><|sor|>Exactly.
Health > Looks
Wish more people had the same mindset<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 417 |
programmerhumor | poodlebutt76 | hq6brxy | <|sols|><|sot|>I have been attacked.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/D7smfwb.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I mean my clothes don't make my back hurt, shitty chairs do.<|eor|><|sor|>This. We buy expensive shit for the ergonomics and pain minimization. I don't need an ergonomic shirt.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 400 |
programmerhumor | 98raider | hq63v0v | <|sols|><|sot|>I have been attacked.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/D7smfwb.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I do all my clothes shopping at tech conventions<|eor|><|sor|>Did you really find pants here ? Or you choose to no wear any ?<|eor|><|sor|>If you work from home then you don't need pants. Just don't suddenly stand up during video meetings.<|eor|><|sor|>if you don't have pants, how do you go to the convention?<|eor|><|sor|>It's "no shirt, no shoes, no service" not "no pants, no service". Checkmate atheists.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 364 |
programmerhumor | Ceros007 | hq5gqye | <|sols|><|sot|>I have been attacked.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/D7smfwb.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Techs don't buy clothes; they just change employers and get promotional clothing.<|eor|><|sor|>You guys get promotional stuff?
Where I work they created a boutique where you literally have to buy their propaganda stuff...<|eor|><|sor|>Usually they give you free promotional shizznit. Then only place I worked for that offered a boutique and did not provide a thing free was NASA.
EDIT: Yes, maybe that's because they are a government agency.<|eor|><|sor|>I can confirm I do not have a NASA salary.
I always thought it was funny. Who would buy a company branded t-shirt except for buttlicker? Give it to me free, I'll wear it and people will say "Oh look, that company looks real cool. I bet they have great reviews on Glassdoor"<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 352 |
programmerhumor | 64mb | hq5j299 | <|sols|><|sot|>I have been attacked.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/D7smfwb.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Those DataDog T-shirts are so soft though, never even used their product<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 345 |
programmerhumor | y0uveseenthebutcher | hq6f4ll | <|sols|><|sot|>I have been attacked.<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/D7smfwb.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Sooo, I can't wear my Google Wave 2009 launch shirt anymore?<|eor|><|sor|>You shouldnt wear a collectors item.<|eor|><|sor|>what about my Google+ 2011 Superbowl Champions tshirt?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 338 |
programmerhumor | Odd_Diamond_6600 | v58cqk | <|sols|><|sot|>priorities<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/xgfs4jad9r391.jpg<|eol|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 84,473 |
programmerhumor | Big-Don-Rob | ib8az8a | <|sols|><|sot|>priorities<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/xgfs4jad9r391.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>That's dirty, but I like it.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 8,283 |
programmerhumor | the_unheard_thoughts | ib8dchw | <|sols|><|sot|>priorities<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/xgfs4jad9r391.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Wait until your gf enrolls in a CS course... <|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 3,798 |
programmerhumor | Probably-Broken-2345 | ib8f244 | <|sols|><|sot|>priorities<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/xgfs4jad9r391.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>That's dirty, but I like it.<|eor|><|sor|>Try calling your partner a "1" and see how that goes.<|eor|><|sor|>I went even better and called her a "0"<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 2,628 |
programmerhumor | Ok-Lobster-919 | ib8envu | <|sols|><|sot|>priorities<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/xgfs4jad9r391.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>That's dirty, but I like it.<|eor|><|sor|>Try calling your partner a "1" and see how that goes.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 2,445 |
programmerhumor | Probably-Broken-2345 | ib8f46u | <|sols|><|sot|>priorities<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/xgfs4jad9r391.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Wait until your gf enrolls in a CS course... <|eor|><|sor|>I'm sure she'll enjoy Counter Strike<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,983 |
programmerhumor | Alokir | ib8fbum | <|sols|><|sot|>priorities<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/xgfs4jad9r391.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Was the array sorted by his level of interest?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,777 |
programmerhumor | AlFlakky | ib8ayv6 | <|sols|><|sot|>priorities<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/xgfs4jad9r391.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>So girlfriend must be a Lua developer..<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,691 |
programmerhumor | FelixLeander | ib8jodl | <|sols|><|sot|>priorities<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/xgfs4jad9r391.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>That's dirty, but I like it.<|eor|><|sor|>Try calling your partner a "1" and see how that goes.<|eor|><|sor|>I went even better and called her a "0"<|eor|><|sor|>Instructions unclear, GF broke up<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,530 |
programmerhumor | MandBoy | ib8hbb2 | <|sols|><|sot|>priorities<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/xgfs4jad9r391.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>[1] Might be next to you in bed. But [0] is in your heart.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,173 |
programmerhumor | danabrey | ib8krog | <|sols|><|sot|>priorities<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/xgfs4jad9r391.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>That's dirty, but I like it.<|eor|><|sor|>Try calling your partner a "1" and see how that goes.<|eor|><|sor|>I went even better and called her a "0"<|eor|><|sor|>Instructions unclear, GF broke up<|eor|><|sor|>Put her back together<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,157 |
programmerhumor | CollectionLeather292 | ib8dtxk | <|sols|><|sot|>priorities<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/xgfs4jad9r391.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Whats \[0\] though?<|eor|><|sor|>A pointer to [1]<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,046 |
programmerhumor | reyad_mm | ib8qbpu | <|sols|><|sot|>priorities<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/xgfs4jad9r391.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Was the array sorted by his level of interest?<|eor|><|sor|>Yes, ascending<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 834 |
programmerhumor | LostTeleporter | ib8maj6 | <|sols|><|sot|>priorities<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/xgfs4jad9r391.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>That's dirty, but I like it.<|eor|><|sor|>Try calling your partner a "1" and see how that goes.<|eor|><|sor|>I went even better and called her a "0"<|eor|><|sor|>Instructions unclear, GF broke up<|eor|><|sor|>Put her back together<|eor|><|sor|>Therapists hate this one trick<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 818 |
programmerhumor | spiderpig36 | ib8b9m5 | <|sols|><|sot|>priorities<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/xgfs4jad9r391.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Plot twist: you are a Matlab developer<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 605 |
programmerhumor | GeePedicy | ib8dagm | <|sols|><|sot|>priorities<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/xgfs4jad9r391.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>So girlfriend must be a Lua developer..<|eor|><|sor|>Or MatLab? Though they're mostly called vectors<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 590 |
programmerhumor | WizziBot | ib8e8mm | <|sols|><|sot|>priorities<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/xgfs4jad9r391.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Whats \[0\] though?<|eor|><|sor|>A pointer to [1]<|eor|><|sor|>Aww<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 474 |
programmerhumor | joran213 | ib8qm7e | <|sols|><|sot|>priorities<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/xgfs4jad9r391.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Was the array sorted by his level of interest?<|eor|><|sor|>Yes, ascending<|eor|><|sor|>Descending in this case then right? 0 being top prio, 1 a little less and onwards<|eor|><|sor|>r/whoosh<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 440 |
programmerhumor | OrbitalMechanic1 | ib8dcb6 | <|sols|><|sot|>priorities<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/xgfs4jad9r391.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Whats \[0\] though?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 423 |
programmerhumor | Big-Don-Rob | ib8gx97 | <|sols|><|sot|>priorities<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/xgfs4jad9r391.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Beep boop -- this looks like a screenshot of a tweet! Let me grab a [link to the tweet](https://twitter.com/SParenica/status/1531544815560712192) for ya :)
^(Twitter Screenshot Bot)<|eor|><|sor|>Who is naming bots non bot things? Bad people.
Good bot!<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 356 |
programmerhumor | ambitiousfinanceguy | y66jrv | <|sols|><|sot|>Still slightly better than "NM fixed it"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ghpaxx5r5cu91.jpg<|eol|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 84,087 |
programmerhumor | ambitiousfinanceguy | isnl7dn | <|sols|><|sot|>Still slightly better than "NM fixed it"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ghpaxx5r5cu91.jpg<|eol|><|soopr|>And then there are either no other posts on the topic, or they all say "learn 2 Google" and point to the long dead webpage.<|eoopr|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 5,837 |
programmerhumor | maitreg | isnnxzm | <|sols|><|sot|>Still slightly better than "NM fixed it"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ghpaxx5r5cu91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Still, the worst are the Microsoft forums. Most questions get one and only one response, posted twice, by some official Microsoft user with an Indian name:
* 1 paragraph repeating your question back to you, reassuring you they understand the frustration you must be feeling, and are here to help.
* A copy-pasted script for some extremely basic problem that is either unrelated to your question entirely or doesn't solve your problem.
* 1 paragraph begging you to mark their answer as the solution.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 4,318 |
programmerhumor | Hurricane_32 | isnoydo | <|sols|><|sot|>Still slightly better than "NM fixed it"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ghpaxx5r5cu91.jpg<|eol|><|soopr|>And then there are either no other posts on the topic, or they all say "learn 2 Google" and point to the long dead webpage.<|eoopr|><|sor|>Worse than "learn to Google", is when you find that answer
#from a Google search.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 3,650 |
programmerhumor | golther | isnq6gq | <|sols|><|sot|>Still slightly better than "NM fixed it"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ghpaxx5r5cu91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Still, the worst are the Microsoft forums. Most questions get one and only one response, posted twice, by some official Microsoft user with an Indian name:
* 1 paragraph repeating your question back to you, reassuring you they understand the frustration you must be feeling, and are here to help.
* A copy-pasted script for some extremely basic problem that is either unrelated to your question entirely or doesn't solve your problem.
* 1 paragraph begging you to mark their answer as the solution.<|eor|><|sor|>Question: Extremely detailed question with an error message.
Answer: Run sfc /scannow
Marked as solved.
Pretty sure that it wasn't marked solved by the submitter.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,790 |
programmerhumor | DeficientDefiance | isnm2ds | <|sols|><|sot|>Still slightly better than "NM fixed it"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ghpaxx5r5cu91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Final boss mode: You create a member account to repeat the question just to find out that a moderator needs to approve new members manually which usually takes several days, to then find out you're not allowed to post in that subforum unless your account is a week old or you have ten posts, to finally post the thread you wanted just to get it locked and be told to use the search function to dig up long dead, long locked threads (but posting in old threads is also an offense).<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,257 |
programmerhumor | bnl1 | isnqhrq | <|sols|><|sot|>Still slightly better than "NM fixed it"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ghpaxx5r5cu91.jpg<|eol|><|soopr|>And then there are either no other posts on the topic, or they all say "learn 2 Google" and point to the long dead webpage.<|eoopr|><|sor|>Worse than "learn to Google", is when you find that answer
#from a Google search.<|eor|><|sor|>True. That happens to me all the time.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,080 |
programmerhumor | esr360 | isnobp4 | <|sols|><|sot|>Still slightly better than "NM fixed it"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ghpaxx5r5cu91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I googled a problem once and there was just one result on google, and it was me asking the same question several years prior<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 719 |
programmerhumor | ambitiousfinanceguy | isnli4q | <|sols|><|sot|>Still slightly better than "NM fixed it"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ghpaxx5r5cu91.jpg<|eol|><|soopr|>I make a point of posting the answers to my stack overflow questions that didn't get an answer but that I figured out later because of [this comic.](https://i.imgur.com/IPVbdYg.jpg)<|eoopr|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 613 |
programmerhumor | CryoClone | isnybpt | <|sols|><|sot|>Still slightly better than "NM fixed it"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ghpaxx5r5cu91.jpg<|eol|><|soopr|>And then there are either no other posts on the topic, or they all say "learn 2 Google" and point to the long dead webpage.<|eoopr|><|sor|>Worse than "learn to Google", is when you find that answer
#from a Google search.<|eor|><|sor|>True. That happens to me all the time.<|eor|><|sor|>[removed]<|eor|><|sor|>As someone in IT that has to solve problems no one else has on legacy software, this whole thread is giving me too much anxiety this early.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 587 |
programmerhumor | maitreg | isno5w3 | <|sols|><|sot|>Still slightly better than "NM fixed it"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ghpaxx5r5cu91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Final boss mode: You create a member account to repeat the question just to find out that a moderator needs to approve new members manually which usually takes several days, to then find out you're not allowed to post in that subforum unless your account is a week old or you have ten posts, to finally post the thread you wanted just to get it locked and be told to use the search function to dig up long dead, long locked threads (but posting in old threads is also an offense).<|eor|><|sor|>"Sorry, only members who have answered at least 10 questions are allowed to answer questions or start new threads."
Great. Now where did I put my sonic screwdriver.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 582 |
programmerhumor | Presolar_Grains | iso3cao | <|sols|><|sot|>Still slightly better than "NM fixed it"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ghpaxx5r5cu91.jpg<|eol|><|soopr|>And then there are either no other posts on the topic, or they all say "learn 2 Google" and point to the long dead webpage.<|eoopr|><|sor|>Worse than "learn to Google", is when you find that answer
#from a Google search.<|eor|><|sor|>True. That happens to me all the time.<|eor|><|sor|>[removed]<|eor|><|sor|>As someone in IT that has to solve problems no one else has on legacy software, this whole thread is giving me too much anxiety this early.<|eor|><|sor|>Perhaps you should try [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/ProgrammerHumor/comments/y66jrv/still_slightly_better_than_nm_fixed_it/iso3cao/) for your anxiety.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 546 |
programmerhumor | new_refugee123456789 | isnpxxj | <|sols|><|sot|>Still slightly better than "NM fixed it"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ghpaxx5r5cu91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>This is why I hate forum replies that are just links with no elaboration. Because they're either dead external links, or it links to page 3 of 7 in another thread somewhere in that forum, so you have to back up two pages to get the context, and you're still not sure how it's relevant, and yet the search you did landed you on the page with the contextless link.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 425 |
programmerhumor | PSK1103 | isnlpcp | <|sols|><|sot|>Still slightly better than "NM fixed it"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ghpaxx5r5cu91.jpg<|eol|><|soopr|>I make a point of posting the answers to my stack overflow questions that didn't get an answer but that I figured out later because of [this comic.](https://i.imgur.com/IPVbdYg.jpg)<|eoopr|><|sor|>i understand that's the denvercoder9 xkcd without even clicking the link<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 348 |
programmerhumor | maitreg | isnn40z | <|sols|><|sot|>Still slightly better than "NM fixed it"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ghpaxx5r5cu91.jpg<|eol|><|soopr|>And then there are either no other posts on the topic, or they all say "learn 2 Google" and point to the long dead webpage.<|eoopr|><|sor|>Uh oh, now you're going to stir up the SO fanboys and get stories about how "I've posted 17,200 questions on SO and that's never happened to me. Guess you're just unlucky."<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 336 |
programmerhumor | DeithWX | isnsbox | <|sols|><|sot|>Still slightly better than "NM fixed it"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ghpaxx5r5cu91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Everytime I see "Nevermind, I solved it", without posting the solution, I die inside.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 295 |
programmerhumor | kevinf100 | isnsuqx | <|sols|><|sot|>Still slightly better than "NM fixed it"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ghpaxx5r5cu91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Still, the worst are the Microsoft forums. Most questions get one and only one response, posted twice, by some official Microsoft user with an Indian name:
* 1 paragraph repeating your question back to you, reassuring you they understand the frustration you must be feeling, and are here to help.
* A copy-pasted script for some extremely basic problem that is either unrelated to your question entirely or doesn't solve your problem.
* 1 paragraph begging you to mark their answer as the solution.<|eor|><|sor|>Question: Extremely detailed question with an error message.
Answer: Run sfc /scannow
Marked as solved.
Pretty sure that it wasn't marked solved by the submitter.<|eor|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>System file checker. To put it simply, it will check all the windows (might only be important files) for corrupt files and tries to replace/fix them. For how they get corrupt is any reason tbh. Could be a bad install, another program fucked it to a random bit flip in ram that is rare<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 269 |
programmerhumor | Vincenzo__ | isnp8cv | <|sols|><|sot|>Still slightly better than "NM fixed it"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ghpaxx5r5cu91.jpg<|eol|><|soopr|>And then there are either no other posts on the topic, or they all say "learn 2 Google" and point to the long dead webpage.<|eoopr|><|sor|>Uh oh, now you're going to stir up the SO fanboys and get stories about how "I've posted 17,200 questions on SO and that's never happened to me. Guess you're just unlucky."<|eor|><|sor|>Their questions: how to print to the console in python with +6498 votes<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 266 |
programmerhumor | JoshDM | isnq8nw | <|sols|><|sot|>Still slightly better than "NM fixed it"<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ghpaxx5r5cu91.jpg<|eol|><|soopr|>And then there are either no other posts on the topic, or they all say "learn 2 Google" and point to the long dead webpage.<|eoopr|><|sor|>If there is one thing SO has going for it, it's that the "learn 2 Google" comments get shut down / eliminated through moderation.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 257 |
programmerhumor | harshal96 | hx7xfy | <|sols|><|sot|>Were safe<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/7ptrlc47tuc51.jpg<|eol|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 82,633 |
programmerhumor | Sputtrosa | fz4f36c | <|sols|><|sot|>Were safe<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/7ptrlc47tuc51.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Also, they'll need to know how to fake laughter when the project manager tells a joke. I can't imagine an AI being good enough to able to distinguish a joke from the PM telling me what our deadline is.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 3,560 |
programmerhumor | optimator71 | fz4pbff | <|sols|><|sot|>Were safe<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/7ptrlc47tuc51.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I remember when I started my career as as a developer in mid-90es, I took a class for a tool that generated Java code from some proprietary business domain language. The instructor predicted that programming as we know it will soon go away, business analysts would write procedures in a language close to natural and the code would be generated by the tool.
25 years later, it is very clear that writing code is the least complicated part of building an application.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,543 |
programmerhumor | crazedchriz | fz4hh91 | <|sols|><|sot|>Were safe<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/7ptrlc47tuc51.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Theyll just hire us to tell the computer what to do.
Wait a minute....<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,136 |
programmerhumor | Gent- | fz4jn3a | <|sols|><|sot|>Were safe<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/7ptrlc47tuc51.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Also, they'll need to know how to fake laughter when the project manager tells a joke. I can't imagine an AI being good enough to able to distinguish a joke from the PM telling me what our deadline is.<|eor|><|sor|>Sometimes the deadline is the joke. And we all cry.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,014 |
programmerhumor | hed82 | fz4idh1 | <|sols|><|sot|>Were safe<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/7ptrlc47tuc51.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I mean, even nowadays a programmer just tells the computer what the client wants.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 866 |
programmerhumor | GvRiva | fz4iqi1 | <|sols|><|sot|>Were safe<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/7ptrlc47tuc51.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I mean, even nowadays a programmer just tells the computer what the client wants.<|eor|><|sor|>I have no idea what the client wants, i just guess what the clients clients want<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 673 |
programmerhumor | SandyDelights | fz531dx | <|sols|><|sot|>Were safe<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/7ptrlc47tuc51.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I remember when I started my career as as a developer in mid-90es, I took a class for a tool that generated Java code from some proprietary business domain language. The instructor predicted that programming as we know it will soon go away, business analysts would write procedures in a language close to natural and the code would be generated by the tool.
25 years later, it is very clear that writing code is the least complicated part of building an application.<|eor|><|sor|>I thought that had already been tried before the '90s? That was supposed to be the selling point of COBOL, you don't need programmers to write it.<|eor|><|sor|>Is that why there are so many horror stories?<|eor|><|sor|>Honestly, yes, but the horror stories are a bit exaggerated (Im in my 30s and work in COBOL, assembly, and a few other languages).
COBOLs biggest problem is that it was, yes, designed to be written like a document. Everything is in sentences and paragraphs, and it used to be very lengthy (with an 80 character width limit and most code not starting until column... 12?).
So if you wanted to add something, like variables A and B with resultant C:
ADD A TO B GIVING C END-ADD
Instead of:
C = A+B
Or if you want a loop of a function:
PERFORM <function> UNTIL A EQUAL 0.
Or:
PERFORM UNTIL A EQUAL 0
SUBTRACT 1 FROM A
END-PERFORM
A lot of the lengthy shit has been deprecated, though, and you can just do shit like: COMPUTE C = A+B
Which is a little longer than C=A+B, but yanno.
How it handles data structures can be a little weird, but its also very explicit you define how much space something has in a very reasonable and rational way, you can identify specific parts of a variable, etc.
E.g.:
01 VAR-A PIC X(10).
Takes up 10 bytes in memory, and its allocated as characters.
01 VAR-A.
02 SUB-5 PIC X(5).
02 SUB-3 PIC X(3).
02 SUB-2 PIC X(2).
Theyre the same size in memory, and if you do something to VAR-A in either case, youll do it to the full 10 bytes. In the latter case, you can pick out SUB-5 for the first 5 bytes, SUB-3 for bytes 6-8, or SUB-2 for bytes 9 and 10.
You can also redefine storage in memory, e.g.:
01 VAR-A PIC X(10).
01 VAR-A2 REDEFINES VAR-A PIC S9(19) COMP-3.
They refer to the same ten bytes in memory, but VAR-A2 is treated as a signed integer of up to 19 digits, stored in nibbles (half-bytes). Or COMP, which is binary. Basically, same shit as using pointers. Similarly, being able to store the data in different formats (binary vs. nibbles vs. bytes), you dont have to deal with the processor having to convert shit to and from formats it can do arithmetic on, or converting it back.
It might seem a bit odd, but it makes processing large amounts of data very simple and very quick; add to that the fact COBOL is old as dirt and thus a very stable language, its easy to see why COBOL continues to be used as **the** workhorse in the financial industry and why those companies continue to dominate the market. While their competitors are pissing money into trying to compete with a setup using interpreted languages, they simply cannot compete with the raw throughput and power of COBOL.
Plenty of companies have pissed tens of millions into researching changing their code bases from COBOL to something new, only for them to not come within spitting distance of the processing time.
Mind, you arent going to use it to do GUIs or a lot of other shit, but for what it does raw processing power burning through huge amounts of data nothing beats it.
P.S. Obligatory mention that COBOL has been object-oriented since 2012. Its like necromancy, except the dead come back like Resident Evils mutants, crawling up the walls and shit.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 583 |
programmerhumor | blehmann1 | fz4vjmt | <|sols|><|sot|>Were safe<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/7ptrlc47tuc51.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I remember when I started my career as as a developer in mid-90es, I took a class for a tool that generated Java code from some proprietary business domain language. The instructor predicted that programming as we know it will soon go away, business analysts would write procedures in a language close to natural and the code would be generated by the tool.
25 years later, it is very clear that writing code is the least complicated part of building an application.<|eor|><|sor|>I thought that had already been tried before the '90s? That was supposed to be the selling point of COBOL, you don't need programmers to write it.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 505 |
programmerhumor | Nomadicminds | fz4qbbs | <|sols|><|sot|>Were safe<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/7ptrlc47tuc51.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Also, they'll need to know how to fake laughter when the project manager tells a joke. I can't imagine an AI being good enough to able to distinguish a joke from the PM telling me what our deadline is.<|eor|><|sor|>Just throw more programmers at the problem to solve it faster ^/s<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 502 |
programmerhumor | SandyDelights | fz50qz9 | <|sols|><|sot|>Were safe<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/7ptrlc47tuc51.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Also, they'll need to know how to fake laughter when the project manager tells a joke. I can't imagine an AI being good enough to able to distinguish a joke from the PM telling me what our deadline is.<|eor|><|sor|>Just throw more programmers at the problem to solve it faster ^/s<|eor|><|sor|>What one programmer can do in one month, two programmers can do in two months!<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 424 |
programmerhumor | bitchigottadesktop | fz50efb | <|sols|><|sot|>Were safe<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/7ptrlc47tuc51.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I remember when I started my career as as a developer in mid-90es, I took a class for a tool that generated Java code from some proprietary business domain language. The instructor predicted that programming as we know it will soon go away, business analysts would write procedures in a language close to natural and the code would be generated by the tool.
25 years later, it is very clear that writing code is the least complicated part of building an application.<|eor|><|sor|>I thought that had already been tried before the '90s? That was supposed to be the selling point of COBOL, you don't need programmers to write it.<|eor|><|sor|>Is that why there are so many horror stories?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 346 |
programmerhumor | Slapfisher | fz4podo | <|sols|><|sot|>Were safe<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/7ptrlc47tuc51.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Theyll just hire us to tell the computer what to do.
Wait a minute....<|eor|><|sor|>So basically, Microsoft VS is computer automation<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 278 |
programmerhumor | r00x | fz4vmb7 | <|sols|><|sot|>Were safe<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/7ptrlc47tuc51.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Also, they'll need to know how to fake laughter when the project manager tells a joke. I can't imagine an AI being good enough to able to distinguish a joke from the PM telling me what our deadline is.<|eor|><|sor|>Sometimes the deadline is the joke. And we all cry.<|eor|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>I dislike these new captchas.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 239 |
programmerhumor | SandyDelights | fz5f3gd | <|sols|><|sot|>Were safe<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/7ptrlc47tuc51.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I remember when I started my career as as a developer in mid-90es, I took a class for a tool that generated Java code from some proprietary business domain language. The instructor predicted that programming as we know it will soon go away, business analysts would write procedures in a language close to natural and the code would be generated by the tool.
25 years later, it is very clear that writing code is the least complicated part of building an application.<|eor|><|sor|>I thought that had already been tried before the '90s? That was supposed to be the selling point of COBOL, you don't need programmers to write it.<|eor|><|sor|>Is that why there are so many horror stories?<|eor|><|sor|>Honestly, yes, but the horror stories are a bit exaggerated (Im in my 30s and work in COBOL, assembly, and a few other languages).
COBOLs biggest problem is that it was, yes, designed to be written like a document. Everything is in sentences and paragraphs, and it used to be very lengthy (with an 80 character width limit and most code not starting until column... 12?).
So if you wanted to add something, like variables A and B with resultant C:
ADD A TO B GIVING C END-ADD
Instead of:
C = A+B
Or if you want a loop of a function:
PERFORM <function> UNTIL A EQUAL 0.
Or:
PERFORM UNTIL A EQUAL 0
SUBTRACT 1 FROM A
END-PERFORM
A lot of the lengthy shit has been deprecated, though, and you can just do shit like: COMPUTE C = A+B
Which is a little longer than C=A+B, but yanno.
How it handles data structures can be a little weird, but its also very explicit you define how much space something has in a very reasonable and rational way, you can identify specific parts of a variable, etc.
E.g.:
01 VAR-A PIC X(10).
Takes up 10 bytes in memory, and its allocated as characters.
01 VAR-A.
02 SUB-5 PIC X(5).
02 SUB-3 PIC X(3).
02 SUB-2 PIC X(2).
Theyre the same size in memory, and if you do something to VAR-A in either case, youll do it to the full 10 bytes. In the latter case, you can pick out SUB-5 for the first 5 bytes, SUB-3 for bytes 6-8, or SUB-2 for bytes 9 and 10.
You can also redefine storage in memory, e.g.:
01 VAR-A PIC X(10).
01 VAR-A2 REDEFINES VAR-A PIC S9(19) COMP-3.
They refer to the same ten bytes in memory, but VAR-A2 is treated as a signed integer of up to 19 digits, stored in nibbles (half-bytes). Or COMP, which is binary. Basically, same shit as using pointers. Similarly, being able to store the data in different formats (binary vs. nibbles vs. bytes), you dont have to deal with the processor having to convert shit to and from formats it can do arithmetic on, or converting it back.
It might seem a bit odd, but it makes processing large amounts of data very simple and very quick; add to that the fact COBOL is old as dirt and thus a very stable language, its easy to see why COBOL continues to be used as **the** workhorse in the financial industry and why those companies continue to dominate the market. While their competitors are pissing money into trying to compete with a setup using interpreted languages, they simply cannot compete with the raw throughput and power of COBOL.
Plenty of companies have pissed tens of millions into researching changing their code bases from COBOL to something new, only for them to not come within spitting distance of the processing time.
Mind, you arent going to use it to do GUIs or a lot of other shit, but for what it does raw processing power burning through huge amounts of data nothing beats it.
P.S. Obligatory mention that COBOL has been object-oriented since 2012. Its like necromancy, except the dead come back like Resident Evils mutants, crawling up the walls and shit.<|eor|><|sor|>Huh. Thats kinda cool. I've heard it being used in finance stuff alot and how learning it is a guranteed job but never could find out why wiki wasn't in depth enough. Thank you so much for typing this all out!<|eor|><|sor|>Honestly, the vast majority of COBOL programmers are maintenance programmers. They maintain systems that are hundreds of millions to several billion lines of code, for a code base thats been built up over the last fifty plus years.
Frankly, you could take any Joe off the street and teach them COBOL. Its a very easy language to use in the overwhelming majority of use-cases. Easy to read, easy to understand; I remember having to calculate the number of bits/bytes you needed for MALLOC in C when working on embedded systems, while COBOL is pretty straight-forward.
And they pay well for it, not just because its archaic and rarely taught anymore, but because they want to keep you. Our company spoils the fuck out of us, because they know how hard we are to replace; I dont know of anyone whos been there more than a few years who makes less than 100k annually, before merit bonuses. Which, considering we dont have California cost-of-living, is pretty damn good.
That said, maintenance programming is fucking boring as all hell, and Id have left years ago if I didnt have a constant flow of new and interesting shit to do one of the perks of being that guy.
Im like a kid in a playground, an archaeologist, a forensic detective, and a software engineer every damn day. Sometimes its stressful because clients dont understand that shit cant be done overnight, we have quality controls that require weeks of integrated testing, weeks of code review, etc., but I genuinely enjoy tearing apart this old girl and seeing what makes the heart of our financial industry tick.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 231 |
programmerhumor | Qicken | fz4v36w | <|sols|><|sot|>Were safe<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/7ptrlc47tuc51.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I mean, even nowadays a programmer just tells the computer what the client wants.<|eor|><|sor|>I have no idea what the client wants, i just guess what the clients clients want<|eor|><|sor|>Sure. But you tell the computer to do something. We're all compilers<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 227 |
programmerhumor | MD_Wolfe | fz4kyp1 | <|sols|><|sot|>Were safe<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/7ptrlc47tuc51.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Met a guy last year working on a build a code program for engineering projects that would create blocks of code to perform a certain function that the client could drag and drop as needed. Basically working on a system that would negate the need for his own job. Was very interesting stuff.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 220 |
programmerhumor | WhyIsTheNamesGone | fz540kx | <|sols|><|sot|>Were safe<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/7ptrlc47tuc51.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Also, they'll need to know how to fake laughter when the project manager tells a joke. I can't imagine an AI being good enough to able to distinguish a joke from the PM telling me what our deadline is.<|eor|><|sor|>Just throw more programmers at the problem to solve it faster ^/s<|eor|><|sor|>What one programmer can do in one month, two programmers can do in two months!<|eor|><|sor|>We've got 9 programmers building the same product to the same deadline, and I think they intend to just ship their favorite.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 218 |
programmerhumor | Slapfisher | fz4pq5o | <|sols|><|sot|>Were safe<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/7ptrlc47tuc51.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Met a guy last year working on a build a code program for engineering projects that would create blocks of code to perform a certain function that the client could drag and drop as needed. Basically working on a system that would negate the need for his own job. Was very interesting stuff.<|eor|><|sor|>Scratch<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 207 |
programmerhumor | verascity | fz4hrr8 | <|sols|><|sot|>Were safe<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/7ptrlc47tuc51.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>"Make me a peanut butter and jelly sandwich."<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 202 |
programmerhumor | GumBeats20 | wf632a | <|sols|><|sot|>*cries*<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ic9982toyhf91.jpg<|eol|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 82,494 |
programmerhumor | tunisia3507 | iis80uo | <|sols|><|sot|>*cries*<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ic9982toyhf91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>So many people would kill for a nice spacious private cubicle like that over open plan and shared offices.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 3,449 |
programmerhumor | Aelinthali68 | iis4h04 | <|sols|><|sot|>*cries*<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ic9982toyhf91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>"Fast paced and exciting environment "
Translation:
We plan to give you 10 hours of work then demand you get it done in 8.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 3,088 |
programmerhumor | GrannysGumJobs | iis5vsu | <|sols|><|sot|>*cries*<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ic9982toyhf91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>"Fast paced and exciting environment "
Translation:
We plan to give you 10 hours of work then demand you get it done in 8.<|eor|><|sor|>Were looking for someone who identifies as a self starter
Translation:
The previous employees didnt document shit and we need you to decipher their work.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,580 |
programmerhumor | octafed | iisu5s7 | <|sols|><|sot|>*cries*<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ic9982toyhf91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>So many people would kill for a nice spacious private cubicle like that over open plan and shared offices.<|eor|><|sor|>My first cubicle was like the picture.
The last one before migrating to remote work basically required I sit down in the chair and roll/slide into the cubicle as if it were a fighter jet cockpit.
More cubes per floor was the goal, screw everything else.
A cube like the picture today, is equivalent to an office back then.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 986 |
programmerhumor | ChordSlinger | iiswxf4 | <|sols|><|sot|>*cries*<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ic9982toyhf91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>"Fast paced and exciting environment "
Translation:
We plan to give you 10 hours of work then demand you get it done in 8.<|eor|><|sor|>Were looking for someone who identifies as a self starter
Translation:
The previous employees didnt document shit and we need you to decipher their work.<|eor|><|sor|>Combined with we dont have the time or energy to train you, ever, for anything<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 687 |
programmerhumor | mike_a_oc | iis4eaa | <|sols|><|sot|>*cries*<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ic9982toyhf91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Ewww only one screen...<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 558 |
programmerhumor | PorkRoll2022 | iis5f0e | <|sols|><|sot|>*cries*<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ic9982toyhf91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Fast-paced environment: Rockstar sales team signed you up to deliver 120 hours of work in 80 hours.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 510 |
programmerhumor | Dabnician | iiswqqq | <|sols|><|sot|>*cries*<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ic9982toyhf91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>So many people would kill for a nice spacious private cubicle like that over open plan and shared offices.<|eor|><|sor|>My first cubicle was like the picture.
The last one before migrating to remote work basically required I sit down in the chair and roll/slide into the cubicle as if it were a fighter jet cockpit.
More cubes per floor was the goal, screw everything else.
A cube like the picture today, is equivalent to an office back then.<|eor|><|sor|>If the goal is to make more efficient use of available space, why are they so opposed to working from home?<|eor|><|sor|>Because then you cant charge your self rent on the building you also own and claim your overhead is so high you are unable to give raises.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 474 |
programmerhumor | argv_minus_one | iisvn1s | <|sols|><|sot|>*cries*<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ic9982toyhf91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>So many people would kill for a nice spacious private cubicle like that over open plan and shared offices.<|eor|><|sor|>My first cubicle was like the picture.
The last one before migrating to remote work basically required I sit down in the chair and roll/slide into the cubicle as if it were a fighter jet cockpit.
More cubes per floor was the goal, screw everything else.
A cube like the picture today, is equivalent to an office back then.<|eor|><|sor|>If the goal is to make more efficient use of available space, why are they so opposed to working from home?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 380 |
programmerhumor | Bryguy3k | iis43rw | <|sols|><|sot|>*cries*<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ic9982toyhf91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>Seriously the chair doesnt have a giant tear with half the padding coming out of it. There also arent weird stains on the floor.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 368 |
programmerhumor | halfanothersdozen | iisbnxi | <|sols|><|sot|>*cries*<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ic9982toyhf91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Fast-paced environment: Rockstar sales team signed you up to deliver 120 hours of work in 80 hours.<|eor|><|sor|>Don't. They won't learn if you enable their behavior.
Come in at 10 and leave at 3 like a normal developer and what gets done gets done.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 305 |
programmerhumor | Fadamaka | iit6xav | <|sols|><|sot|>*cries*<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ic9982toyhf91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>"Fast paced and exciting environment "
Translation:
We plan to give you 10 hours of work then demand you get it done in 8.<|eor|><|sor|>Were looking for someone who identifies as a self starter
Translation:
The previous employees didnt document shit and we need you to decipher their work.<|eor|><|sor|>Combined with we dont have the time or energy to train you, ever, for anything<|eor|><|sor|>I yet to have a job where they do proper technical onboarding regarding the codebase.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 295 |
programmerhumor | Alicendre | iis5fi8 | <|sols|><|sot|>*cries*<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ic9982toyhf91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>Seriously the chair doesnt have a giant tear with half the padding coming out of it. There also arent weird stains on the floor.<|eor|><|sor|>He has actual privacy, too! Look at these beautiful walls. And so much room.
Seriously what I wouldn't give to say fuck off to open office plans forever...<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 279 |
programmerhumor | BTLMCHN | iisfdra | <|sols|><|sot|>*cries*<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ic9982toyhf91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Ewww only one screen...<|eor|><|sor|>And it's a sad one too,
not some wide screen<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 243 |
programmerhumor | Wolfeh2012 | iit5ehs | <|sols|><|sot|>*cries*<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ic9982toyhf91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>"Fast paced and exciting environment "
Translation:
We plan to give you 10 hours of work then demand you get it done in 8.<|eor|><|sor|>Were looking for someone who identifies as a self starter
Translation:
The previous employees didnt document shit and we need you to decipher their work.<|eor|><|sor|>Combined with we dont have the time or energy to train you, ever, for anything<|eor|><|sor|>Our ideal employee has already worked here for 10 years and is willing to take a pay cut.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 224 |
programmerhumor | NeverNeverLandIsNow | iite8kh | <|sols|><|sot|>*cries*<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ic9982toyhf91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>"Fast paced and exciting environment "
Translation:
We plan to give you 10 hours of work then demand you get it done in 8.<|eor|><|sor|>Were looking for someone who identifies as a self starter
Translation:
The previous employees didnt document shit and we need you to decipher their work.<|eor|><|sor|>Combined with we dont have the time or energy to train you, ever, for anything<|eor|><|sor|>I yet to have a job where they do proper technical onboarding regarding the codebase.<|eor|><|sor|>>I yet to have a job where they do proper technical onboarding regarding the codebase.
Yeah that is for sure, I read about a place that trained new workers for 6 weeks in an intensive program so that they understood the codebase before they did any actual work. I myself have never worked anywhere that did anything like that, it is usually "here is what I want you to do, here is the code, good luck"<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 193 |
programmerhumor | killerrin | iit3wbb | <|sols|><|sot|>*cries*<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/ic9982toyhf91.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>So many people would kill for a nice spacious private cubicle like that over open plan and shared offices.<|eor|><|sor|>My first cubicle was like the picture.
The last one before migrating to remote work basically required I sit down in the chair and roll/slide into the cubicle as if it were a fighter jet cockpit.
More cubes per floor was the goal, screw everything else.
A cube like the picture today, is equivalent to an office back then.<|eor|><|sor|>If the goal is to make more efficient use of available space, why are they so opposed to working from home?<|eor|><|sor|>Because then you cant charge your self rent on the building you also own and claim your overhead is so high you are unable to give raises.<|eor|><|sor|>Charge yourself rent? Can you explain that one to me?<|eor|><|sor|>Step 1: Register holding company with a cash startup injection of $xxxxxxxx and set yourself up as a majority shareholder.
Step 2: Gift/Sell office building(s) to holding company for $xxxxxxxx.
Step 3: Have holding company charge rent and maintenance costs and remit a dividend to shareholders at monthly/quartly/yearly intervals.
Step 4: Pay rent and Claim rent as an expense when the government asks.
Step 5: ?????
Step 6: Profit off tax credits and dividends (which equals rent - maintenance)<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 164 |
programmerhumor | Cheris_P | 10k0az3 | <|sols|><|sot|>Accomplishments<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/50fhg3lhmzda1.jpg<|eol|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 81,716 |
programmerhumor | No_Distribution_6023 | j5nouat | <|sols|><|sot|>Accomplishments<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/50fhg3lhmzda1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>The one performance review trick companies don't want you to know
Edit: lol this post really blew up. Thanks for all the upvotes! People in the Midwest, stay warm tonight, storm's coming in.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 5,070 |
programmerhumor | zaos336 | j5nsbpl | <|sols|><|sot|>Accomplishments<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/50fhg3lhmzda1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>You don't remove the time out... You lower it, then you can easily improve it again later.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 2,612 |
programmerhumor | GrootGertGedoente | j5npfvg | <|sols|><|sot|>Accomplishments<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/50fhg3lhmzda1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>It is always good to build in timeouts. That way you can always increase the performance easily at a later stage<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 2,088 |
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