Thomas Angle

Thomas E. Angle is the villain from the ZOOM Harry Potter Club's "Harry Potter Dungeon Mystery Crawl," hosted by Xenia (that’s the tea). Angle is most notable for being a crazy man who kidnapped two groups of Hogwarts students from the Hogwarts Express before they began their first year. He also goes by Tomas Angle, Thomas Engle, Tomas Engle, Thomas Engel, and Tomas Engel. Angle was initially thought to have only partaken in the Dungeon Mystery Crawl Kidnappings; however, current reports of other kidnappings are being traced to him as well. His signature marks include kidnapping children before they learn magic, leaving the initials T.A. written on a nearby wall, and "Avatar: The Last Airbender" references. He is 5' 11'' and failed the SAT. It was recently revealed that Angle's birth name is Thomas Eugene Angle, though like all facts abut his backstory this could be a lie. Other potential middle names include Ernest, Edgar, Elftonge, Elizabeth, and Eamonn. Thomas Angle's favorite month is Women's history month, which should honestly be every month. Also, his favorite colors are pink and brown. There's a nonzero chance that Dave Malloy, playwright of *Natasha, Pierre, and the Great Comet of 1812* knows of Thomas Angle's existence because Malloy's father Randy liked one of Matt's tweets about comet on the TA account (it's really the dad; we checked).

## **Background**

Little is known about Mr. Angle's background, but he is rumored to be a distant relation of the Addams family. He is also, according to Xenia, a proud Italian American. He was sorted into Ravenclaw at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry during his first year, though, seeing himself as an underdog, he didn't get along with any of his peers. He was particularly fond of Charms and Potions (and poetry), and was a member of the Frog Choir for seven years straight. He enjoyed solving riddles and puzzles, which led him to begin tinkering with logical and mechanical toys. He is 5'11, and proud of this fact (coincidentally, the same height as Timothée Chalamet, Michelle Obama, Brad Pitt, and 10-yr-old Death God Matt). No one knows how it is possible, but there have been reports of Thomas Angle laying eggs. Did he kidnap a goose and splice its DNA into his biological collective? Of course not...unless.

Thomas Angle was an only child...eventually. He may, at some point, have had a younger brother, Jonathan Angle, a Gryffindor who now runs a haberdashery \*(where he specializes in crafting mood changing top hats) and an older sister Mariah Angle (the good one), a fellow Ravenclaw who serves as an advocate on behalf of centaur land rights.

## **Personality**

Thomas Angle often kept to himself. A gifted child, he never saw the need to bother with socialization, and this led to him feeling awkward around his peers. His humble talents in Potions and Charms truly impressed both Flitwick and Slughorn. Though he wasn't fond of socializing, he accepted Slughorn's invitation to joining Slug Club and began studying in private lessons with Flitwick. Flitwick became his mentor and would often say to him that no matter the situation, a problem can only be solved correctly using wits.

Though a villain, it is clear that Angle is merciful. For each of the groups, he provided three potions to help revive students and a magical amulet of clarivoyance.

It also seems that Angle has an infatuation with "Avatar: The Last Airbender," as he often includes in his puzzles the four elements: water, fire, earth, and air.

## **Time at the Ministry and Getting Back to Hogwarts**

Sometime after finishing school, he began employment at the the Ministry of Magic, working on a few architectural projects until he began coordinating various projects with Hogwarts. His work was often viewed as strange, even for a wizard, but he was incredibly talented and creative. However, one day, Angle was carrying large supplies to his office, and when turning the corner, tripped on a floor wire some first-year students, who had meant the prank to be for Snape, had tied. His large and incredibly heavy supplies were scattered everywhere, and unfortunately, an inexperienced first-year fell victim to his supplies, and they crushed the first-year to death.

## **Recovery and Aftermath**

Angle was devastated, as he had never imagined part of his creations could kill a student. While the other students were suspended, Angle was fired.

Before he left, Flitwick, who had been the Head of Ravenclaw when Angle had been at Hogwarts and Angle's mentor, turned away in disgrace. The last thing he muttered to Angle before leaving was, "You're no Ravenclaw."

   Angle soon grew bitter. Feeling doubt about his identity and belonging into Ravenclaw, he continued to work on his last mysterious project: a "more accurate and efficient" way to sort students into Hogwarts. The Ministry and Hogwarts, both unsure of what the project was and terrified his work now would be produced out of revenge and hatred, began to send him letters, including a cease-and-desist. The letters contained sensitive information, and it appeared that upon opening the letters, they began to black out information with some kind of unknown magic. The only things that could be made out before the letters were completely scratched production of his last project remained a mystery as no one saw him ever leaving his office, and yet, no one ever saw him in his office after the first week. The only tab in the top navigation bar, or out were "Mr. Angle, please do not continue your project. We are not proceeding with this project. Any further work is outside of Ministry and Hogwarts bounds." The things that remained visible in his office were a desk with locked drawers, a chair, and scattered papers. Although, it is rumored that someone once saw him sharpening spikes and experimenting with levers and machinery.

## **Pre-Kidnappings**

Thomas Angle was not seen again, but two students, a Ravenclaw and a Slytherin, went missing about a week before the kidnappings, which is now being linked to Angle as well. The current conclusion is that these students were used to test Angle's Dungeon Crawl mechanisms and logistics for the actual kidnappings. Their current whereabouts are also unknown; however, according to the surviving students, one of the missing students resembled Angle's A.I., while the other missing student's glittery voice could be heard as students traveled from room to room.

## **The Dungeon Mystery Crawl Kidnappings**

Thomas Angle was not seen again for many decades until recently. Two groups of students were kidnapped by Mr. Angle: a group of Gryffindors and Hufflepuffs on July 7th, 2020, and a group of Ravenclaws and Slytherins on July 9th, 2020. Upon awakening from the kidnapping, the students found themselves in the doorless, windowless office of Mr. Thomas Angle.

The Ministry had been contacted about the kidnapping; however, they were unable to enter Angle's office. Angle had placed a charm on his office, and the Ministry gave up after 12 minutes.

## **Aftermath of Kidnapping**

Both groups of students were able to escape with a water bottle, disguised as a Portkey, leading to a final room with a potion. After one brave student took an "ultimate cost," the path to the world was revealed once more in the dusk of an English field. Each group of students was found in the front gates of Hogwarts. One particular Hufflepuff was found clinging a stick tightly to his chest (which was made to be his wand later as a means of retribution for the traumatic experience). Upon their newly-found freedom, the Ministry and various Hogwarts professors spotted them immediately, and the students were awarded House Points for their less- than-reluctant participation.

All students from Gryffindor and Hufflepuff, luckily, had survived. However, one person in the second kidnapping mysteriously disappeared and did not return with the rest of the group. Interestingly enough, according to Thomas Angle's qualifications, many students were NOT sorted correctly. In fact, only one member in the first group of nine students sorted into his actual House. Out of the eight members in the second group, only two members were sorted into their actual Houses. These House results were revealed by Thomas Angle's A.I., designed as a Christmas tree at first appearance, and Nicki Minaj upon further observations.

## **Current Whereabouts**

Unknown. Thomas Angle at some point "Confunded" himself immediately after the kidnappings. There was an unconfirmed spotting on July 8th around 6pm PST. The witnesses claim they saw him watching "Hamilton: The Musical" on Disney+. Rumors claim he has a secret hideout in the Ural Mountains, where he owns exactly three DVDs: The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey, Soylent Green, and Mama Mia: Here We Go Again.

Just as birds work for the bourgeoise, Thomas Angle can communicate with felines, and all cats give him intel on whom to kidnap. This has led to the well known acronym ACAT (All Cats Are ThomasAngle's. Yes ThomasAngle's is one word)

It turns out Thomas Angle was the Hunter we made along the way. This of course means that Matt is Thomas Angle's Son.

## **Theme Song**

Now I’ve got a little story to tell you,

It’s more like a warning cuz you never know.

It’s about a man named Thomas Angle,

Who kidnapped a bunch of kids long ago.

With all his doohickeys and fangles,

Better watch out cuz he's Thomas Angle.

Thomas was a quiet kid at first,

But then the situation took a turn for the worst.

He started kidnapping kids super often,

Even you might think that you were cursed.

He'll leave you freshly bloody and mangled,

so watch out cuz he's Thomas Angle.