Storytime 3

**Storytime 3** is the seventh track of Kevin & Abi And The Secret Of The Stolen Sun.

## Lyrics

Ryvyr:

It's storytime, it's storytime, it's storytime, storytime

Chorus: (x4)

It's storytime, it's storytime, it's storytime

Ryvyr:

It's storytime, oh storytime has come

So grab a drink and sit down on your bum

Well, once upon a time, not long ago

There was a big bad war, as we all know

The War of the Ankle Bracelets, we deposed

Mauron the Bad and his fiery nose

Goblins and fairies fought side by side

And we vowed our friendship wouldn't die

So every 50 years, we'd meet and cry

"Hey besties, it's party time!"

Well, one year, you know the fairies came

And we hired some dwarves to go and make

A sword to show our lasting bond

But this is where the story gets kind of long

There was a goblin boy, his name Demetrius and he

He had a special fairy bud named Galadriel, now see

I want to stress this tale is not a romance, they were buds they say

Just two super buds who dreamed of being roommates some day

The goblin king said, "Boys, I have a mission for you now

Take a like little stroll and go pick up the sword from down the south

From the dwarves and bring it back here and don't dawdle on the way

The sacred friendship of our people rest upon you two, this day."

Chorus: (x4)

It's storytime, it's storytime, it's storytime

Ryvyr:

It's storytime, well storytime has come

So grab a drink and sit down on your bum

So the two best buds, they went on down

To get the sword from the dwarves down there in the south

But you'll never guess just what caught their eye

A grove of shruffy shrooms they happened to find

Demetrius said, "Now we must be

Responsible young adults," then he

And Galadriel just laughed and laughed, and hey

The boys they tripped balls through the whole next day

But in the middle of their good times, I say

Well, this alien spaceship came down their way

And they said, "A fairy boy, this our lucky day!"

So they went and poor Galadriel, they did take

Woah, yeah

Woah, yeah

Demetrius awoke the next morning and he said

Several very naughty words that you don't need to hear and then

He vowed his bud he'd rescue, but the spaceship it was parked

On the top of Mount Chumungahunga, which is very steep and dark

But the first thing he did was go to the dwarves and get that sword

'Cause he wasn't gonna let anything happen to his favorite buddarooni

He liked to get naked with, but in a completely pure and wholesome way

So he climbed up Chumungahunga which was not an easy feat

And he saw the spaceship, realized he was screwed and so what he

Did was swallow that whole sword and kept it in his throat and tum

Then the aliens, they came gathered Demetrius on up

They threw him in a cell with ol' Galadriel, his bud

Then Demetrius said, "Here!" and puked the whole sword back on up

And he said, "My special bud, I've come to rescue you this day

Take this sword and we can show these aliens how fairies play."

So the buds, they fought and sliced and sluiced

And alien blood went splat and sploosh

And smack and crack and wham and pow

It's time for violence right about now

Smack, a-whack, whack, crack!

Wham, bam, slam! Pow!

Smash, crash, bash, smash!

Boom, bam!

Galadriel returned to his family, it's true

But Demetrius, he died up on the mountain I tell you

But that sword, it was named after him and they all say

That when Galadriel became king, that sword never left his side for a single day

And that's why aliens check your butt, to make sure there are no swords hiding in it.

Chorus: (x4)

It's storytime, it's storytime, it's storytime

Ryvyr:

Yes it's story, storytime

Have some storytime with wine

Oh story, story, storytime

It's storytime, yeah, storytime has come

So grab a drink and sit down on your bum