Boaty McKittenface

an adventure starring Willy, Stella, and Jade

Tweet length description: Join Stella, Willy and Jade for a boat race on the high seas! Peril, pirates and… powerups(?!) abound!

Non Player Characters:

* Grigori Vendel
* Toumas Vendel
* Ursula “W” Umbridge
* Charles Swanberg
* Bellow Xu
* Greenbeard Mamani
* Slickdraw Buchel
* Felionis Ganbold
* Swanny Stills
* Trisgin Ali

Plot Summary:

Stella, Willy, and Jade are all at the Firebreathing Kittens guild hall looking for a job and fellow guild members to adventure with. There are three jobs advertised: “lost kitten,” “blue dragon on a rampage,” and “crew needed for the *Orca.*” As the *Orca* job seems the most interesting to the three adventurers, they accept the job and seek out the questgivers Gregory and Tomus Vendell. The captains tell the party they will enter their ship in a sailing competition and offer the party 100GP if they agree to be the crew. They try to negotiate a higher reward, but it remains 100GP split between the three.

It turns out that the captains of the *Orca* ship need a crew because their original crew was missing. The captains and adventurers all suspect foul play. The adventurers learn that two other ships will be competing against the *Orca:* the *Needle* and the *Birge.* The party learns that team *Needle* seems respectful and professional, whereas team *Birge* seems rough, aggressive, and sketchy.

As they have a few hours before the competition, the party decides to investigate the crew’s disappearance. They go to a sleazy bar called the Oily Oaf, a den of illegal activity where Jade recognizes some criminals she had previously arrested. She talks to a thug and Oily Oaf regular she knows named Swany (sic) and tells him that she is retired from the guards. She uses their newfound camaraderie to learn that the original crew of the *Orca* was here a few days ago, and that they got into an argument with the crew of the *Birge*. Willy also finds some key information: the *Birge* crew have been frequenting this bar and boasting that “the UU crew will have a great view of our victory from the hold.”

The adventurers decide that there is enough evidence for them to search the hold of the *Birge*. Stella suggests a plan for Jade and Willy to distract the *Birge*’s crew and separate one of its members from the rest so she can enter the ship’s hold disguised as that crew member to check for the missing people. As the distraction, Jade feigns a heart attack and Willy calls for aid. Due to their amazing performance, Jade and Willy attract the attention of two crew members working on the deck: a dragonborn and a human. The crew members immediately come onto the docks to help. The Dragonborn stays by Jade’s side to hear what could be her final words and the human runs for aid.

With Jade and Willy having successfully separated one of the crew members, Stella disguises herself as the human and heads onto the ship. While Jade and Willy stall for time, Stella tries to find the hold. Though she is unsuccessful, she manages to find Captain Greenbeard. Still disguised as the human, who she learns is named Slick-Draw, Stella finds the *Orca*’s original crew beaten, bound, and held captive aboard the ship. She convinces Greenbeard to move the captives from the hold to the bow of the ship so any guards that may come aboard the ship are less likely to find them.

Meanwhile, the real Slick-Draw comes back with a crowd of people and someone who appears to be a doctor. Seeing that this could blow their whole operation, Willy decides to stall for time by performing an “eldritch miracle” to “save Jade from the brink of death.” As they had not agreed on a signal beforehand, Willy fires an Eldritch Blast and chants loudly, hoping to get Stella’s attention. After moving the captives to the bow, the captain and disguised Stella both hear the commotion outside and agree that they should get back to their posts. Stella waits for the captain to leave before peering out to the docks and seeing Slick-Draw. After the captain is back in his quarters, she drops her disguise and pretends to be an escort the captain was just with, feigning embarrassment and telling the bystanders that “I was never here.” When they see Stella out of her disguise, Jade and Willy assure the bystanders that Jade is fine now that Willy “saved her.” They leave the scene, Willy acting as Jade’s crutch. Stella hurries away and they all rendezvous in an alley far enough from the scene.

After the party shares some words of congratulations, Stella confirms that the missing crew is, indeed, on the *Birge*. The party intends to do the race and dramatically reveal the *Birge* team’s crimes. The party agrees with her plan and they head back to the *Orca* for seamanship training.

The time comes for the race. The adventurers each occupy critical roles on the ship: Willy steering the ship at the helm, Jade in the rigging to control the ship’s speed, and Stella in the crows’ nest keeping an eye out for loot, obstacles, and other ships. Jade and Stella also alternate between their normal posts and harpooning crates. In a crazy race filled with obstacles, whirlpools, tentacles, sabotage, krakens, cannon fire, and lightning strikes, the adventurers manage to win! Their ship is nearly obliterated by lightning as they reach the finish line, but it ends with an amazing, earth-shattering (or rather, sword-shattering) move that saves the ship.

The party waits at the finish line for the *Birge* so they can expose their villainous crew. In an impressive show of eldritch blasts, commanding, and cape billowing, the party reveals the *Orca*’s old crew stowed away in the *Birge*’s bow. The villains are disqualified and arrested for kidnapping and the party receives the 100 gold. Willy and Stella both see future potential in the *Orca* ship, and the captains form an alliance with the Firebreathing Kittens.

Memorable Quotes:

"Tell my family..." - Jade, 2022

"It's not nice to call people idiots!" - Willy, 2022

"Nope." - Stella, 2022

"Whatever it is, I didn't do it! They did it." - Swany, 2022