Best of Pipsqueak

**Best of Pipsqueak** is a My Little Pony/Thomas parody of the Thomas and Friends US video, Best of Percy. It features one first season episode, five second season episodes and three third season episodes of Spike the Dragon and Friends, narrated by George Carlin and Ringo Starr.

## Cast

* Spike as Thomas
* Shining Armor as Edward
* Filthy Rich as Henry
* Big Macintosh as Gordon
* Cranky Doodle Donkey as James
* Pipsqueak as Percy
* Braeburn as Toby
* Soarin as Duck
* Gilda as Daisy
* Changelings as The Troublesome Trucks
* Owlowiscious as Harold
* Hoity Toity as Sir Topham Hatt
* Snips as Bill (*not named*)
* Snails as Ben (*not named*)
* Apple Bloom as Annie (*does not speak*)
* Sweetie Belle as Clarabel (*does not speak*)
* Scootaloo as Henrietta (*does not speak*)
* Princess Celestia as Lady Hatt (*does not speak*)
* Discord as Diesel (*cameo*)
* Goldie Delicious as Mrs. Kyndley (*cameo*)
* Everyone else as Themselves

## Episodes

1. Pipsqueak's Ghostly Trick
2. A Scarf for Pipsqueak
3. Pipsqueak Takes the Plunge
4. Pipsqueak's Predicament
5. Spike, Pipsqueak and the Mail
6. Pipsqueak Runs Away
7. Pipsqueak and the Signal
8. Pipsqueak Proves a Point
9. Pipsqueak's Promise

## Transcript

### Pipsqueak's Ghostly Trick

Pipsqueak: "And every year on a date of the accident, it runs again as a warning to others plunging into the gap, shrieking like a lost soul."

Spike: "Pipsqueak, what are you talking about?"

Pipsqueak: "The ghost pony. Driver saw it last night."

Spike and Braeburn: "Where?"

Narrator: "Asked Spike and Braeburn."

Pipsqueak: "He didn't say. Ooh, it makes my hooves wobble to think of it."

Spike: "Huh!"

Narrator: "Said Spike."

Spike: "You're just a silly little pony. I'm not scared!"

Pipsqueak: "Spike didn't believe in your ghost."

Narrator: "Said Pipsqueak next morning. His driver laughed."

Pipsqueak's Driver: "Neither do I. It was only a pretend ghost story."

Narrator: "Pipsqueak was disappointed. That evening, he came back from the harbor.

Pipsqueak knew where he was, even in the dark."

Pipsqueak: "Crowe's farm crossing. We shan't be long now."

Narrator: "He liked running at night. The path hummed and the light showed green. But a broken cartload of lyme lay ahead. Sam the farmer had just gone for help.

(CRASH!)

Pipsqueak broke the cart to smithereens. Lyme flew everywhere. He puffed quickly to the nearest signal box.

Pipsqueak's driver explained what had happened"

Signalman: "I'll see to it."

Narrator: "Said the signalman."

Signalman: "But you better clean Pipsqueak, or people will think he's a ghost."

Narrator: "Pipsqueak chuckled."

Pipsqueak: "Do let's pretend I'm a ghost and scare Spike. That'll teach him to say I'm a silly little pony."

Narrator: "Braeburn promised to help.

Spike was getting ready for his evening run."

Braeburn: "Pipsqueak's had an accident."

Narrator: "Cried Braeburn."

Spike: "Poor pony."

Narrator: "Said Spike."

Spike: "Botheration! That means I'll be late."

Braeburn: "They've cleared the line for you, but there's something worse."

Spike: "Out with it, Braeburn! I can't wait all evening."

Braeburn: "I've just seen something."

Narrator: "Said Braeburn."

Braeburn: "It looked like Pipsqueak's ghost. It said it was, was coming here t-t-t-to warn us."

Spike: "Huh! Who cares? Don't be frightened, Braeburn. I'll take care of you."

Pipsqueak: "Peep, peep! Pip, pip, pip, peep! Let me in. Let me in."

Narrator: "Wailed Pipsqueak."

Braeburn: "No, no. Not by the smoke on my chimney chim chim."

Pipsqueak: "I'll chuff, and I'll puff, and I'll break your door in."

Spike: "Oh dear!"

Narrator: "Exclaimed Spike."

Spike: "It's getting late. Oh, I have no idea. Oh, I must find Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle."

Narrator: "It was morning when Spike returned."

Braeburn: "Where have you been?"

Narrator: "Asked Braeburn."

Spike: "Ah, well."

Narrator: "Said Spike."

Spike: "I knew you'd be sad about Pipsqueak and I, uh, I didn't like to intrude. I slept in the freight shed and...

Oh, sorry. Can't stop. Got to see a pet about a pony."

Narrator: "Pipsqueak was not in the worst for his adventure, and was still enjoying himself enormously. He had heard everything."

Pipsqueak: "Well, well, well. What do you know about that?"

Braeburn: "Anyone would think,"

Narrator: "Chuckled Braeburn."

Braeburn: "That our Spike had just seen a ghost."

### A Scarf for Pipsqueak

Narrator: "It was a cold winter's morning in Ponyville. The wind was bitter and the ground hard with frost. Spike and Pipsqueak were cold and cross."

Spike: "All I want is a warm body."

Narrator: "Huffed Spike."

Spike: "Firelighter knows that. He's late."

Pipsqueak: "He's not late."

Narrator: "Replied Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "This weather woke us up early."

Narrator: "Gusts of wind swirled round the library, tossing flakes of snow towards Spike. Then they swooshed around Pipsqueak too."

Pipsqueak: "Why don't we talk about something else?"

Narrator: "Shivered Pipsqueak."

Spike: "Yes."

Narrator: "Replied Spike."

Spike: "Like how silly we'll look when you heads turn into icicles."

Pipsqueak: "That's not funny. Maybe we'll stop feeling cold if we talk about warm things, like sunshine and steam."

Spike: "And firelighters."

Narrator: "Muttered Spike."

Pipsqueak: "Scarves!"

Narrator: "Continued Pipsqueak."

Spike: "Scarves."

Narrator: "Laughed Spike."

Spike: "That's what you need, Pipsqueak. A woolly scarf round your neck."

Narrator: "Spike was only teasing. But Pipsqueak thought happily about scarves until the firelighter came.

Hoity Toity was enjoying hot porridge for breakfast. He was looking forward to taking important visitors on a tour of the town, and had pressed his special trousers."

Hoity Toity: "I shall put them in my trunk."

Narrator: "Hoity Toity said to Princess Celestia."

Hoity Toity: "And change into them just before the photographs are taken."

Narrator: "Then he set off to catch his ride.

Pipsqueak was now working hard. His body was warm, and he had plenty of strength, but he still thought about scarves. He saw them everywhere he went."

Pipsqueak: "My neck's cold, my neck's cold."

Narrator: "He puffed."

Pipsqueak: "I want a scarf, I want a scarf."

Filthy Rich: "Rubbish, Pipsqueak."

Narrator: "Said Filthy Rich."

Filthy Rich: "Ponies don't wear scarves."

Pipsqueak: "Ponies with proper necks do."

Narrator: "Replied Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "Your neck is too big."

Narrator: "Before Filthy Rich could answer, Pipsqueak puffed away. Filthy Rich snorted. He was looking forward to pulling the special cart.

It was time for the photographs. Everyone was excited. Hoity Toity was waiting on the platform for his trousers. They were in a trunk amongst a big load of baggage. The porters were taking the baggage trolley across the line. They were walking backwards to see that nothing else fell off.

Pipsqueak was still being cheeky. His driver always shut off steam just outside the station. Pipsqueak wanted to surprise the buffaloes by coming in as quietly as he could.

But the porters didn't here him either. Pipsqueak gave them such a fright and boxes and bags burst everywhere."

Pipsqueak: "Oh!"

Narrator: "Groaned Pipsqueak.

Sticky streams of jam trickled down Pipsqueak's face. A hat fell on his hoof. Worst of all, a pair of trousers coiled lovingly round his neck.

Everyone was pretty angry. Hoity Toity seized the top hat."

Hoity Toity: "Mine!"

Narrator: "He shouted."

Hoity Toity: "Pipsqueak,...

Narrator: "He bellowed."

Hoity Toity: "Look at this!"

Pipsqueak: "Yes sir. I am sir."

Hoity Toity: "My best trousers too!"

Pipsqueak: "Yes sir. Please sir."

Narrator: "Answered Pipsqueak nervously."

Hoity Toity: "We must pay the passengers for their spoiled clothes, and you've ruined my god-dang trousers. I hope this will teach you not to play tricks with the buffaloes."

Narrator: "Pipsqueak went off to the yard. He felt very silly. On the way, he met Cranky."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Hello, Pipsqueak. So you found a scarf, eh? But legs go in trousers, not necks."

Narrator: "And he puffed off to tell Filthy Rich the news.

That evening, Spike and Pipsqueak were resting in the shed. Pipsqueak's driver had taken away the trousers and given Pipsqueak a good rubdown."

Spike: "Firelighter's promised to come early tomorrow."

Narrator "Said Spike. Filthy Rich arrived. He'd enjoyed taking the visitors around and now felt sorry for Pipsqueak too."

Filthy Rich: "Driver says the weather will be warmer tomorrow. You won't need a scarf, Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "Certainly not."

Narrator: "Replied Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "Ponies don't need scarves. Ponies need warm bodies. Everyone knows that."

### Pipsqueak Takes the Plunge

Narrator: "One day, Filthy Rich wanted to rest, but Pipsqueak was talking to some unicorns. He was telling them about the time he had brave bad weather to help Spike."

Pipsqueak: "It was raining hard. Water swirled under my body. I couldn't see where else I was going, but I struggled on."

Snips: "Oh, Pipsqueak, you are brave."

Pipsqueak: "Well, it wasn't anything really. Water's nothing to a pony with determination."

Snails: "Tell us some more, Pipsqueak."

Filthy Rich: "What are you unicorns doing here?"

Narrator: "Hissed Filthy Rich."

Filthy Rich: "This house is for Hoity Toity's animals. Go away! Silly things!"

Narrator: "Filthy Rich snorted."

Pipsqueak: "They're not silly!"

Narrator: "Pipsqueak had been enjoying himself."

Filthy Rich: "They are silly, and so are you. 'Water's nothing to a pony with determination.' Huh!"

Pipsqueak: "Anyway,"

Narrator: "Said cheeky Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "I'm not afraid of water. I like it."

Narrator: "He ran off to the harbor singing,"

Pipsqueak: "Once pony taking some buffaloes was afraid of a few drops of rain."

Filthy Rich: "No one ever lets me forget about the time I won't come out of the tunnel in case the rain spoiled my fur."

Narrator: "Huffed Filthy Rich.

Spike was looking at a board on the quay. DANGER!"

Spike: "We mustn't go past it."

Narrator: "He said."

Spike: "That's orders."

Pipsqueak: "Why is that?"

Spike: "Danger means falling down on something."

Narrator: "Said Spike."

Spike: "I went past danger once and fell down a mine."

Pipsqueak: "I can't see a mine."

Narrator: "Said Pipsqueak. He didn't know that the foundations of the quay had sunk. The path now sloped downward to the sea."

Pipsqueak: "Stupid board!"

Narrator: "Said Pipsqueak. He had made a plan.

One day he whispered to the changelings."

Pipsqueak: "Will you give me a bump when we get to the quay?"

Narrator: "The changelings had never been asked to bumped an animal before. They giggled and chattered about it."

Pipsqueak: "Driver doesn't know my plan."

Narrator: "Chortled Pipsqueak."

Changelings: "On! On! On!"

Narrator: "Laughed the changelings. But Pipsqueak thought they were helping."

Pipsqueak: "I'll pretend to stop at the station, but the changelings will push me past the board. Then I'll make them stop. I can do that whenever I like."

Narrator: "Every wise animal knows that you cannot trust changelings."

Changelings: "Go on! Go on!"

Narrator: "They yelled, and bumped Pipsqueak's driver and fireman down to the ground."

Pipsqueak: "Oh!"

Narrator: "Said Pipsqueak, sliding past the board. Pipsqueak was frantic."

Pipsqueak: "That is good!"

Narrator: "Pipsqueak was sunk."

Hoity Toity: "You are a very disobedient pony!"

Narrator: "Pipsqueak remembered that voice."

Pipsqueak: "Please sir, get me out, sir. I'm truly sorry, sir."

Hoity Toity: "No Pipsqueak, we cann't be doing that till high tide. I hope it will teach you to take care of yourself."

Pipsqueak: "Yes sir."

Narrator: "It was dark when they rescued Pipsqueak. He too cold and stiff to move all by himself.

Next day, he was sent to the hospital on Filthy Rich's cart."

Filthy Rich: "Well! Well! Well!"

Narrator: "Chuckled Filthy Rich."

Filthy Rich: "Did you like the water?"

Pipsqueak: "No!"

Filthy Rich: "I am surprise. You need more determination, Pipsqueak. Water's nothing to a pony with determination, you know. Perhaps maybe next time you will like it a lot better."

Narrator: "Pipsqueak is quite determined that there won't be a next time."

### Pipsqueak's Predicament

Narrator: "Gilda the Griffon's work in the countryside was full of surprises, but she was frightened of bulls and cows, and she remained very lazy and stubborn.

One day, Braeburn brought Scootaloo to the station where Pipsqueak was grumpily shunting."

Braeburn: "Hello, Pipsqueak. I see Gilda's left the milk behind again."

Pipsqueak: "I'll have to make a special journey with it, I suppose. Anyone would think I'd nothing to do!"

Narrator: "Grumbled Pipsqueak."

Braeburn: "Tell you what,"

Narrator: "Replied Braeburn."

Braeburn: "I'll take the milk, you fetch my changelings."

Narrator: "The drivers and stationmaster agreed.

Pipsqueak had never been to the quarry before. He began ordering the changelings about."

Pipsqueak: "Hurry along!"

Narrator: "He said.

The changelings grumbled to each other."

Changelings: "This is Braeburn's place! Pipsqueak's got no right to poke his head in here and push us around."

Narrator: "They whispered and passed the word.

Changelings: "Pay Pipsqueak back! Pay Pipsqueak back!"

Pipsqueak: "Come along,"

Narrator: "Said Pipsqueak sharply."

Pipsqueak: "No nonsense!"

Changelings: "We'll give him nonsense!"

Narrator: "Giggled the Changelings.

But they followed so quietly, that Pipsqueak thought they were under control.

Suddenly, they saw a notice ahead;

All animals stop to pin down brakes."

Pipsqueak: "Peep peep! Brakes, conductor, please!"

Narrator: "But before he could check them, the changelings judged ahead."

Changelings: "On! On! On!"

Narrator: "They hollered."

Pipsqueak: "Help! Help!"

Narrator: "Whistled Pipsqueak.

The man on duty rushed to warn traffic with his red flag, but was too fucking late to switch Pipsqueak to the runaway siding.

Frantically trying to grip the road, Pipsqueak slid into the yard."

Pipsqueak: "Peep peep! Look out!"

(CRASH!)

Narrator: "Pipsqueak's driver and fireman had jumped clear, but Pipsqueak was stranded.

Next day, Hoity Toity arrived. Braeburn and Gilda had helped to clear the wreckage, but Pipsqueak still remained on his perch of changelings."

Hoity Toity: "We must now try,"

Narrator: "Said Hoity Toity firmly,"

Hoity Toity: "To run the road with Braeburn and the griffon. You have put us in an awkward predicament, Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "I am sorry, sir."

Narrator: "Replied Pipsqueak."

Hoity Toity: "You must stay there until we are ready."

Narrator: "Continued Hoity Toity."

Hoity Toity: "And you really must be more careful with changelings."

Narrator: "Pipsqueak sighed. The changeling sproaned beneath his hooves. He quite understood about awkward predicaments.

Hoity Toity spoke sternly to Gilda, too."

Hoity Toity: "My animals work hard. I send lazy animals packing."

Narrator: "Gilda was ashamed."

Hoity Toity: "However, Braeburn says you worked hard yesterday after Pipsqueak's accident, so you deserve another chance."

Gilda: "Thank you, sir."

Narrator: "Said Gilda."

Gilda: "I will work hard, sir. Breaburn says he'll help me."

Hoity Toity: "Excellent. What Braeburn doesn't know about road problems isn't worth knowing. Our Breaburn's an experienced pony."

Narrator: "Next day, Spike came back, and Pipsqueak was sent to be mended.

Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle were delighted to see Spike again, and he took them for a run at once.

All are now friends, and Gilda deserves a great deal. She shooed a cow off the line the other day all by herself. That one shows you, now doesn't it?"

### Spike, Pipsqueak and the Mail

Narrator: "At night, when the other animals are tucked away in the homes, you can still hear the faraway call of an animal, and the sound of feet moving.

This is the sound of the mail delivery. One set of mail is delivered by Spike, and the other by Pipsqueak, as the loads are too heavy for one animal to do the work alone. The mail is given to changelings at the harbor, and the animals pull their line through the silent stations delivering their precious loads.

On a clear night, a big shiny moon brightens their journey, but often Spike and Pipsqueak can't even see the stars. But whatever the weather, lamps along the path always light their way.

One night, Pipsqueak was waiting at the junction. The main path line was late. At last, Filthy Rich arrived."

Filthy Rich: "Sorry."

Narrator: "He puffed."

Filthy Rich: "The mail boat from the mainland was delayed."

Pipsqueak's Driver: "Come on, Pipsqueak."

Narrator: "Said his driver."

Pipsqueak's Driver: "Let's make up for lost time."

Narrator: "Pipsqueak puffed along as quickly as he could, but the sun was already rising as he finished his work."

Pipsqueak: "Never mind."

Narrator: "Thought Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "It's nice to be up an about when it's the start of a new day and there's no one else around."

Narrator: "Pipsqueak was not alone for long."

Pipsqueak: "Bother!"

Narrator: "Thought Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "It's that dizzy thing, Owlowiscious."

Owlowiscious: "Good morning."

Narrator: "Whirled Owlowiscious."

Owlowiscious: "I always said roads were out of date, but you're so slow with the mail. You should give everyone their stamps back."

Narrator: "Pipsqueak was too tired to explained."

Pipsqueak: "Bird brain!"

Narrator: "He muttered."

Soarin: "Good morning, Pipsqueak."

Narrator: "Called Soarin."

Soarin: "You're up early this morning."

Pipsqueak: "No, you proved me wrong."

Narrator: "Sighed Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "I'm back tired and late."

Narrator: "He rolled into the library and fell asleep almost before his back hooves touched the wall.

His driver decided to set off early that evening. Spike was waiting at the station."

Spike: "Thank goodness I have a chance to speak to you. Driver says that the person in charge of the mail has complained to Hoity Toity about the delay last night."

Pipsqueak: "But that wasn't my fault."

Narrator: "Replied Pipsqueak."

Spike: "I know."

Narrator: "Said Spike."

Spike: "And so does Hoity Toity, but this mail person wouldn't listen. Tonight, we'll just have to be quicker than ever before."

Narrator: "The animals were just leaving when they heard a familiar buzzing."

Owlowiscious: "I say you two, there's news flying about."

Pipsqueak: "Where?"

Narrator: "Puffed Pipsqueak crossly."

Owlowiscious: "All over the place. They're going to scrap your mail deliveries and use me instead. Wings work wonders, you know. Always."

Spike: "Rubbish!"

Narrator: "Huffed Spike.

That night, everything ran like clockwork. Spike and Pipsqueak went through the stations, making good time everywhere they went.

At a station, Spike saw a man looking cold and worried. He had missed his ride home."

Spike's Driver: "We can give you a ride."

Narrator: "Said Spike's driver."

Spike's Driver: "But it would be rather uncomfortable."

Jeremiah Jobling: "Thank you."

Narrator: "Said the man."

Jeremiah Jobling: "Anything's much better than sitting here."

Narrator: "The next afternoon, Pipsqueak past the big trees and saw Owlowiscious."

Pipsqueak: "Hello, lazy wings. Are you too tired to fly today?"

Owlowiscious: "The wind's too strong."

Narrator: "Grumbled Owlowiscious."

Owlowiscious: "I've been grounded."

Pipsqueak: "You need roads."

Narrator: "Laughed Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "They work wonders, you know. Always."

Narrator: "That night, Hoity Toity showed the two animals a letter. It was from the man who missed his ride."

Hoity Toity: "He thinks you are both splendid, and everyone says that the mail delivery is the pride of the path."

### Pipsqueak Runs Away

Narrator: "Filthy Rich, Cranky and Big Mac were miserable. They had been shut up for several day for being naughty, and long to be let out again.

At last, Hoity Toity arrived."

Hoity Toity: "I hope you are sorry."

Narrator: "He said."

Hoity Toity: "And that you understand that every job in the town is important. We have a new filly called Pipsqueak, who helps pull buffaloes, and Spike and Shining Armor have worked the main path nicely. But I will let you out now if you promise to behave yourselves."

Filthy Rich, Big Macintosh and Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Yes, sir."

Narrator: "Said the three animals."

Filthy Rich, Big Macintosh and Cranky Doodle Donkey: "We will."

Hoity Toity: "That's good, but please remember that this no arrange rubbish must stop."

Narrator: "Hoity Toity then told Pipsqueak, Shining Armor and Spike that they can go and play on the branch path for a few days. And they ran off happily to find Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle at the junction.

The two fillies were very pleased to see Spike again.

Shining Armor and Pipsqueak played with the changelings."

Changelings: "Stop, stop, stop!"

Narrator: "Screamed the changelings, as they were pushed into their proper sidings, but the two ponies laughed and went on arranging till the changelings were tightly arranged.

Next, Shining Armor took some empty changelings to the quarry. Pipsqueak was left alone. He didn't mind that a bit. He liked watching animals and being cheeky to them."

Pipsqueak: "Hurry, hurry, hurry!"

Narrator: "He would call, and they got very cross.

After a great deal of arranging, Pipsqueak was waiting for the signalman to set the path so that he can get back to the yard. Pipsqueak was being rather careless and not paying attention. Shining Armor had warned Pipsqueak."

Shining Armor: "Be careful on the main path. Whistle to the signalman that you are there."

Narrator: "But Pipsqueak didn't remember to blow the whistle, and so the busy signalman forgot him.

Pipsqueak waited and waited. The path was still against him so he couldn't move. Then he looked along the main path."

Pipsqueak: "Peep, peep!"

Narrator: "He whistled in horror, for rushing straight towards him was Big Macintosh with the express."

Big Macintosh: "Ohhh!"

Narrator: "Groaned Big Mac."

Big Macintosh: "Get out of my way!"

Narrator: "Pipsqueak opened his eyes. Big Mac had stopped just a few inches from him. But Pipsqueak had began to move."

Pipsqueak: "I won't stay here. I'll run away!"

Narrator: "He puffed.

He ran straight through Shining Armor's station, and was so frightened that he ran right up Big Mac's hill without stopping.

After that, he was tired, but he couldn't stop. He had no driver to stop him."

Pipsqueak: "I want to stop, I want to stop."

Narrator: "He puffed.

The man in the signalbox saw that Pipsqueak was in trouble. So he kindly set the path. Pipsqueak puffed wearily onto a nice empty siding, ending in a big bank of earth. He was too tired now to care where he went."

Pipsqueak: "I want to stop, I want to stop. I have stopped."

Narrator: "He puffed thankfully."

Workmen: "Never mind, Pipsqueak."

Narrator: "Said the workmen, as they dug him out."

Workmen: "You shall have a drink and a snack, and then you'll feel better."

Narrator: "Presently, Big Mac arrived."

Big Macintosh: "Well done, Pipsqueak. You started so quickly that you stopped a nasty accident."

Pipsqueak: "I'm sorry I was cheeky."

Narrator: "Said Pipsqueak."

Big Macintosh: "You were clever to stop."

Narrator: "Replied Big Mac. Then Big Mac helped pull Pipsqueak out from the bank.

The two animals are now good friends, but Pipsqueak is always most careful when he goes out on the main path."

### Pipsqueak and the Signal

Narrator: "Pipsqueak works in the yard at the big station.

He loves playing jokes, but they can get him into trouble.

One morning, he was very cheeky indeed."

Pipsqueak: "Hurry up, Big Mac, the buffaloes are ready!"

Narrator: "Big Mac thought he was late."

Pipsqueak: "Ha ha ha ha!"

Narrator: "Laughed Pipsqueak, and showed him a line of dirty changelings.

Big Macintosh thought how to get back at Pipsqueak for teasing him.

Next, it was Cranky's turn."

Pipsqueak: "Stay in the house today, Cranky. Hoity Toity will come and see you."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Ah,"

Narrator: "Thought Cranky."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Hoity Toity knows I'm a fine donkey. He wants me to deliver a special."

Narrator: "Cranky's driver and fireman could not make him move. The other animals grumbled dreadfully. They had to do Cranky's work as well as their own.

At last, the inspector arrived."

Inspector: "Show a hoof, Cranky. You can't stay here all day long."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Hoity Toity told me to stay here. He sent a message this morning."

Inspector: "He did not. How could he? He's away for a week."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Oh!"

Narrator: "Said Cranky."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Oh! Where's Pipsqueak?"

Narrator: "Pipsqueak had wisely disappeared.

When Hoity Toity came back, he was cross with Cranky and Pipsqueak for causing so much trouble.

But the very next day, Pipsqueak was still being cheeky."

Pipsqueak: "I say, you animals, I'm to take some changelings to Spike's junction. Hoity Toity chose me especially. He must know I'm a really useful filly."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "More likely, he wants you out of the way."

Narrator: "Grunted Cranky.

Big Mac looked across to Cranky. They were going to play a trick on Pipsqueak."

Big Macintosh: "Cranky and I were just speaking about signals at the junction. We can't be too careful about signals, but then, I needn't even say that to a really useful filly like you, Pipsqueak."

Narrator: "Pipsqueak felt flattered."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "We have spoken of backing signals."

Narrator: "Put in Cranky."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "They need extra special care, you know. Would you like me to explain?"

Pipsqueak: "No thank you, Cranky."

Narrator: "Said Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "I know all about signals."

Narrator: "Pipsqueak was a little worried."

Pipsqueak: "I wonder what backing signals are."

Narrator: "He thought."

Pipsqueak: "Never mind, I'll manage."

Narrator: "He puffed crossly to his changelings, and felt better.

He came to a signal."

Pipsqueak: "Bother! It's at 'Danger'."

Narrator: "The signal moved to show 'Line Clear'. Its arm moved up, instead of down. Pipsqueak had never seen that sort of signal before."

Pipsqueak: "Down means 'Go', and up means 'Stop', so upper still must mean 'Go Back'. I know! It's one of those backing signals."

Pipsqueak's Driver: "Come on, Pipsqueak!"

Narrator: "Said his driver."

Pipsqueak's Driver: "Off we go now. Stop! You're going the wrong way!"

Pipsqueak: "But it's a backing signal!"

Narrator: "Pipsqueak protested, and told him about Big Mac and Cranky. The driver laughed, and explained."

Pipsqueak: "Oh, dear."

Narrator: "Said Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "Let's start quickly before someone sees us."

Narrator: "He was too late. Big Mac saw everything.

That night, the big animals talked about signals.

They thought the subject was funny. Pipsqueak thought they were being very silly."

### Pipsqueak Proves a Point

Narrator: "Pipsqueak worked hard at the new harbor. The workmen needed stone for their building. Braeburn helped, but sometimes the loads of stone were too heavy, and Pipsqueak had to fetch them for himself. Sometimes he'd see Spike."

Spike: "Well done Pipsqueak. Hoity Toity is very pleased with us."

Narrator: "A bird park was close by. Pipsqueak heard the birds flying overhead all day. The noisiest of all was an owl."

Pipsqueak: "Silly thing!"

Narrator: "Said Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "Why can't it go and fly somewhere else?"

Narrator: "One day, Pipsqueak stopped at the bird park."

Pipsqueak: "Hello."

Narrator: "Said Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "Who are you?"

Owlowiscious: "I'm Owlowiscious. Who are you?"

Pipsqueak: "I'm Pipsqueak. What great wings you've got."

Owlowiscious: "They're nice wings."

Narrator: "Said Owlowiscious."

Owlowiscious: "I can fly high. Don't you wish you could fly?"

Pipsqueak: "Certainly not. I like my road, thank you."

Owlowiscious: "I think roads are slow."

Narrator: "Said Owlowiscious."

Owlowiscious: "They're not much use and quite out-of-date."

Narrator: "He flapped his wings and flew away.

Pipsqueak found Braeburn at the quarry."

Pipsqueak: "I say, Braeburn. That Owlowiscious, that stuck-up old bird, says I'm slow and out-of-date. Just let him wait. I'll show him."

Narrator: "He collected his changelings and started off, still fuming.

Soon they heard a familiar sound."

Pipsqueak's Driver: "Pipsqueak."

Narrator: "Whispered his driver."

Pipsqueak's Driver: "There's Owlowiscious. He not far ahead. Let's race him."

Pipsqueak: "Yes, let's!"

Narrator: "Said Pipsqueak. Pipsqueak pounded along. The changelings screamed and swayed."

Pipsqueak's Driver: "Well, I'll be a ding-dong-danged!"

Narrator: "Said the driver. There was Owlowiscious. The race was on!"

Pipsqueak's Driver: "Go it, Pipsqueak!"

Narrator: "He yelled."

Pipsqueak's Driver: "You're gaining!"

Narrator: "Pipsqueak had never been allowed to run fast before. He was having the time of his life."

Pipsqueak: "Hurry! Hurry! Hurry!"

Narrator: "He panted to the changelings."

Changelings: "We don't want to, we don't want to."

Narrator: "They grumbled. It was not use. Pipsqueak was bucketing along with flying hooves. And Owlowiscious was high and alongside.

The fireman shoveled for dear life."

Pipsqueak's Driver: "Well done, Pipsqueak!"

Narrator: "Shouted the driver."

Pipsqueak's Driver: "We're gaining! We're going ahead! Oh, good boy, good boy!"

Narrator: "A distant signal warned them that the harbor wharf was near."

Pipsqueak: "Peep, peep, peep! Brakes, conductor, please."

Narrator: "The driver carefully checked Pipsqueak's speed.

They rolled under the main path and halted on the wharf."

Pipsqueak: "Oh dear!"

Narrator: "Groaned Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "I'm sure we've lost."

Narrator: "The fireman scrambled to the roof."

Pipsqueak's Fireman: "We've won! We've won!"

Narrator: "He shouted."

Pipsqueak's Fireman: "Owlowiscious is still flying. He's looking for a place to land.

Listen, boys."

Narrator: "The fireman called."

Pipsqueak's Fireman: "Here's a song for Pipsqueak:

*Said Owlowiscious Owl to our Pipsqueak, "You are slow! Your road is out of date, and not much use you know!" But Pipsqueak and his changelings did the trip in record time, And we beat the owl on our old branch line!*"

Narrator: "Pipsqueak loved it."

Pipsqueak: "Oh, thank you!"

Narrator: "He said. He liked the last line once and for all and was a very happy filly."

### Pipsqueak's Promise

Narrator: "Every summer, Ponyville is very busy. Holidaymakers love to sight see. When the weather is fine, there is no better place to visit. Some people like to go to the mountains, others like the valleys.

Children love the seaside.

One morning, Spike was puffing along the live that runs by the coast. His two fillies, Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle had children going to the beach. Everyone was happy.

Pipsqueak was taking some changelings to the harbor."

Pipsqueak: "Hello, Spike. You look cheerful. I wish I could take children today instead of changelings."

Spike: "They're the Vicar's Sunday School."

Narrator: "Explained Spike."

Spike: "I'm busy this evening, but the stationmaster says I can ask you to take the children home."

Pipsqueak: "Of course I will."

Narrator: "Promised Pipsqueak.

Later, Pipsqueak saw Owlowiscious."

Owlowiscious: "Sorry, Pipsqueak. Can't take talk. I'm on high alert."

Pipsqueak: "Why?"

Owlowiscious: "Bad weather's due. My help's always needed. Mind how you go, Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "Pah!"

Narrator: "Huffed Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "As long as I've got a path to walk on, I can go anywhere in any weather anyhow. Goodbye."

Shining Armor: "Be careful."

Narrator: "Warned Shining Armor."

Shining Armor: "There's a storm coming."

Pipsqueak: "A promise is a promise."

Narrator: "Thought Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "No matter what the weather."

Narrator: "The children had a lovely day, but by tea time, dark clouds loomed ahead.

Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle were glad when Pipsqueak arrived. He was just in time. The rain streamed down Pipsqueak's body."

Pipsqueak: "Ugh!"

Narrator: "He shivered, and thought of his nice dry library.

Pipsqueak struggled on past coastal villages and into the countryside.

The river was rising fast."

Pipsqueak: "I wish I could see, I wish I could see!"

Narrator: "Complained Pipsqueak, as he battled against the rain. More trouble lay ahead."

Pipsqueak: "Oh!"

Narrator: "Hissed Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "The water is sloshing my body."

Narrator: "Pipsqueak's driver and fireman had to find some more hot drinks."

Pipsqueak's Fireman: "I'll have some of your hot drinks, please."

Narrator: "Said the fireman to the conductor."

Conductor: "I only made it this morning."

Narrator: "Grumbled the conductor, but he still helped.

Soon, Pipsqueak felt warm and comfortable again. Then he saw Owlowiscious."

Pipsqueak: "Oh dear!"

Narrator: "Thought Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "Owlowiscious has come to laugh at me."

Narrator: "Something thudded onto Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "Ow!"

Narrator: "Exclaimed Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "He needn't throw things."

Pipsqueak's Driver: "It's a parachute."

Narrator: "Laughed his driver."

Pipsqueak's Driver: "Owlowiscious' dropping hot drinks for us."

Pipsqueak: "Thank you, Owlowiscious."

Narrator: "Whistled Pipsqueak."

Owlowiscious: "Good to be of service."

Narrator: "Replied Owlowiscious, and buzzed away.

The water lapped Pipsqueak's hooves. Pipsqueak was losing strength again, but he plunged bravely on."

Pipsqueak: "I promised."

Narrator: "He panted."

Pipsqueak: "I promised."

Narrator: "He made one more big effort, and at last exhausted but triumphant, he brought everyone home."

Spike: "Well done, Pipsqueak!"

Narrator: "Cheered Spike."

Spike: "You kept your promise despite everything."

Narrator: "Hoity Toity arrived with Owlowiscious. First he thanked the men, then Pipsqueak."

Hoity Toity: "Owlowiscious told me you were, um, a wizard. He says he can beat you at some things, but not at being a submarine. I don't know what you two get up to sometimes, but I do know that you're a Really Useful Filly."

Pipsqueak: "Oh, sir."

Narrator: "Whispered Pipsqueak happily."