C2 E69

With the odd basement boys dispatched our heroes need to focus on saving that lost fellow in that labyrinth. Can’t really imagine they will have a better time of the maze but we can hope.

## **Story**

### Long Story

The party stands triumphant before the bodies of their fallen foes: three horrific Sonic-based nightmares which quickly disintegrate into pixel powder. The Dream Master that no one can remember the name of stands broken and smoking on the ground. Ratma Ritmo eyes it with regret. She apologizes to the group. She thought she could use the intelligence inside this piece of technology to create something fun and interesting. But she sees now that it's evil, and can only create terrifying, nightmarish atrocities. And she's sorry.

Well, that's taken care of. After collecting their 100 gold reward for another job well done, the party tries to remember what they were about to do. You know, before being interrupted by Ratma's porn. Selene pulls out her notes, and reminds everyone of their next mission: to rescue the minotaur Grimshaw Shadowhoof from his labyrinthine prison. Before they go, however, the group decides to take a short rest.

During this time, T'Chuck sleeps in a chair, Screech practices changing costumes, and R'Oarc skanks. Very relax-ful. That's not a real word. Oh well. Selene, meanwhile, wanted to take a long rest, because she's more wounded than the rest of them. She's pissed, so she's making a show of bandaging herself up, and sighing passive-aggressively. When no one takes the bait, Selene resigns herself to the bar at The Goblin Pit Too.

But she's not alone at the bar for long. She's joined by a strange Halfling, who greets her, and introduces himself as Grimmly Tumbletoes! We've heard of him! He has recently moved here into town, and opened "The Fumbling Find". Grimmly seems nice, if odd. After catching T'Chuck glaring at them angrily through a window, Grimmly suggests that Selene give T'Chuck a gift. He slides her an amulet, one that, according to Grimmly, will make T'Chuck be a little bit nicer...

Selene thanks the small man, and excuses herself. She does take the amulet to T'Chuck, but tells him who gave it to her. Together, they inspect the amulet (and the rest of the party joins in, too). The piece of jewelry is in the shape of a smiling mouth, and T'Chuck can tell that there's Enchantment magic on it, like it would cast a charm upon its wearer. R'Oarc is intrigued. In order to stop her from putting on the amulet, T'Chuck puts it on himself.

The jinx/hex/curse/charm takes effect. T'Chuck feels the onset of magic pour over him. His spirit and his mind are changed...

And now he has to say "Please and thank you" at the end of every sentence. Alright, that's not so bad. He hates it, though, so he yanks it off and throws it to the side, where Screech picks it up.

Okay, everyone's all rested up, so it's time to hit the old dusty trail. With the map Ratma Ritmo gave them in hand, the party heads out, and they bring along with them Gertie, and R'Oarc's friend Stephanie, that she totally hasn't forgotten about.

Down, into the depths of the ~~Underdark~~ Underground they go. It's getting stuffy down here. And also hot. And the air's all wavy. The rocks are igneous rocks, which can only mean one thing. Liquid hot magma! Or, lava, as Michael calls it. They are underground, so it seems like it should be magma. I've decided to put my foot down on this magma thing (which hurts my foot), because it's funny that the name of the episode is "Lava Lizards", even though they're clearly dealing with magma.

Anyway, there's a bridge! A large, stone bridge, 60 ft long, and 15 ft wide. And below that bridge is a moat, but not of water. Of, you guessed it, liquid hot magma! And there's something moving in the magma. That's not good. After a quick pow-wow, the group decides not to engage. They attempt to make their way across the bridge quickly and quietly, but are... unsuccessful. After a rock gets kicked into the magma, the creatures become alerted to their presence. There's a race to the end of the bridge, but T'Chuck causes a distraction. He falls back and casts *Sanctuary* on himself.

Three large, scary-looking salamander-esque creatures leap from the magma, and point their large, scary-looking tridents at T'Chuck. But, they're unable to touch him. Slowly, cautiously, T'Chuck steps past the salamanders, who stare him down as he passes. He backs away, and eventually, reaches his friends, unharmed. That was weird.

Now on the other side of the bridge, the group can see the labyrinth before them. It's massive, and made of grey-ass granite bricks. There's also an archway, and within is "a sort of portcullis situation". So, like, a gate that can be raised and lowered to keep people out. It's currently open, so the party could just dart inside. And they may want to think about doing that, because the salamanders seem to be remembering that they're supposed to be keeping people out of the labyrinth as well! And now they're coming this way!

Thinking quickly, the party darts past the portcullis, and begins looking for the controls. Well, I say "thinking quickly". What I mean is that, T'Chuck and Screech bicker over who does a better job at finding the controls, while R'Oarc is busy attempting to convince a nearby torch sconce that IT is the controls. So, a normal afternoon's adventure, I'd say. Anyway, eventually, they are able to slam the portcullis down, locking the salamanders outside the gates.

Now, the party is safe. Well, except for that they're inside this massive, and probably very dangerous labyrinth. And their first challenge is right ahead of them... A forked path!

Also, for some reason, T'Chuck throws 3 gold pieces at the salamanders, for their troubles.

### Short

The party takes a short rest after defeating Ratma's dream demons. Selene meets a Halfling named Grimmly Tumbletoes, who gives her a cursed amulet for T'Chuck. It makes him say "Please and thank you" after every sentence, so T'Chuck gives it to Screech instead. They go to tackle their next mission, to rescue the minotaur Grimshaw Shadowhoof from his labyrinthine prison. To get to the labyrinth, they have to cross a bridge above some liquid hot magma! And also outrun some salamanders. Finally, they enter the labyrinth, and close the portcullis behind them.

## **Trivia**

* Day ?? of the campaign.
* No mention is made that this is Episode 69 of this campaign. This is a travesty.
* During their short rest, Screech practices changing his costumes quickly. His current record is 15 minutes (which can't possibly be correct), but he's able to shave it down to a tight 14 minutes, 47 seconds.
	+ It takes him only 4 minutes to put on/take off his mask!
* There's a discussion about what terms best suit the nature of Grimmly Tumbletoes's magical items; "Cursed" sounds like a bad thing, and "Jinxed" is a softer version of a "curse". A "Mild Hex" is better than a "Medium" or a "Hot Hex". And "Hex" doesn't sound as bad as a "Curse", because a "Hex" can be removed. Unclear about the difference between a "Jinx" and a "Hex".
* Michael specifies that they are NOT in the Underdark. He had used that word back in Episode 59, so I've been writing that in the Wiki, but that's not where they are. So, I'm sorry about that.
* Currently, Screech is in the Beholder-doodle costume, but when he's around his friends, he's not wearing the mask. He does put on the mask occasionally, however, when he deems it appropriate.
* R'Oarc has to cast *Animate Dead* on Stephanie each day, so she's permanently down one spell slot.
	+ Also, Stephanie has no memories, so R'Oarc has made a short flip-book of their adventures together. This helps remind Stephanie that they are friends.

## **In This Episode...**

### **Cast and Player Characters**

* Michael DiMauro - *Dungeon Master*
* Tim Lanning - T'Chuck
* Jennifer Cheek - Selene von Esper
* Nika Howard - R'Oarc
* Mike Bachmann - Beholder-doodle (Screech Echo)

### **Non-Player Characters**

* Ratma Ritmo
* Grimmly Tumbletoes
* Gertie
* Stephanie

### **Locations**

* ~~The Underdark~~ The Underground
	+ Mineford
		- The Goblin Pit Too
	+ Grimshaw Shadowhoof's labyrinth

### **Quest Board**

* [Active] - Restore Mineford to it's true potential
	+ [Active] - Rescue Grimshaw Shadowhoof
	+ [Optional] - Mushroom Gathering
	+ [Optional] - Reforge the Path to Morendarith
	+ [Optional] - Bring a load of ale to the newly opened Goblin city of Thornhaven
* [On-hold] - Investigate "Bill, the Necromancer", in the far off city by the coast
* [On-hold] - Take the disembodied lips to the oceanfront, for a burial at sea

### **Quotes**

* **"I'll take that, please and thank you!"** ~ *Screech*

* **"Wait, what was it? Persuasion?"** ~ *R'Oarc*

## **Rolls**

* **Selene** makes an *Insight* check to see what Grimmly Tumbletoes vibes are - 6
	+ She feels like he has her best interests at heart.

* **R'Oarc** rolls *History* to see if there are ghosts in this world - 2
	+ She believes in ghosts

* **T'Chuck** rolls *Perception* to see if there are any foes about - 27
	+ There is a bridge over troubled magma up ahead, and there are things moving in the magma

* Everyone rolls *Stealth* while approaching the magma bridge
	+ **T'Chuck** - 6
		- He kicks a rock, or a skull
	+ **R'Oarc** - 15
		- She's stealthy
	+ **Screech** - Nat 20 + 9
		- He's stealthy
	+ **Selene** - 9
		- She kicks the same rock, or skull, right into the magma

* **T'Chuck** rolls *Insight* on the salamanders to see what's up with them - Nat 20 + 8
	+ One salamander appears to be reminding the others that their job is to stop people from going into the maze

* Some of them roll *Perception* to see if they can find any controls for the portcullis
	+ **Screech** - 17
	+ **T'Chuck** - 18
		- They are able to find the wheel that controls the portcullis

* **R'Oarc** rolls *Persuasion* to do the same thing - 25
	+ She's talking to sconces