Lara3.mp4

"**lara3.mp4"** is the seventeenth video uploaded to the *i am sophie* YouTube Channel. An Instagram post preceded this video & the video was released shortly after.

## Video Description

Nothing is in the description of this particular video.

## Video Transcription

**0:00 - 0:07:** Camera is pointing to an angled view of the computer monitor with the vlog selection menu showing Vlog 5, Vlog 6 & Vlog 7. Vlog 5 is selected & it starts to play.

**0:08 - 0:25:** The same Lara intro from previous vlogs plays with it saying, "**Lara, welcome to my channel**" & a subscribe button being pressed & the bell rung. The title of the video is "**I guess I'm back**" & uploaded on August 31st 2019. It transitions to Lara sitting in a garden, she apologises for not uploading for so long & that she was taking a break from being online.

**0:26 - 1:04:** She continues on about saying how she feels detached & how things haven't felt right in a while. Lara also mentions about how her room has felt tilted & dragging her down. The music subtly changes into a deeper, darker tone that has been seen in previous videos such as "lara2.mp4".

**1:04 - 2:12:** She rambles on about her its made her feel sick with the air being thick & that she's trying to dispel that. Her dad isn't responding to her on the matter & that he's just "**not interested**". Lara mentions that she's in the communal garden & trying to focus on one thing at a time.

**2:13 - 3:28:** Lara continues on with saying that her dad doesn't have a job for her anymore & that he "**shadows it very well**". She's looking for a new job or to go back to school to start a BTEC & that her positivity comes in waves. One minute's fine, the other she isn't. The fat air from her room is making her feel odd & cold inside.

**3:29 - 5:42:** She goes on to ramble about if anyone is watching this or overhears this then she sounds insane & that it is insane. She mentions about having very bizarre repeated dreams; she'll be lying in her bed & she'll feel something before seeing something sink into the bottom of her bed. She doesn't feel afraid & there's a man in a suit (could be presumed to be HATE) that has something wrong with his face & he's caressing her feet lovingly. The man points to a crouching figure in the corner which makes Lara feel threatened & gives her a "**spiral feeling**". The man tells her to not be afraid & after Lara asks whether it is real; the man opens his mouth, unnaturally wide as if to smile & then she wakes up. She gets the same feeling in the tilted room. There's a big part of her that just wants to accept it & let it in. She wonders whether it's so weird to be dragged in a direction like that.

**5:43 - 7:07:** She recounts that the terror from the game made her feel "**small and unsafe**". Although, it also made her feel seen by someone & makes her feel worth something to someone. The fresh air outside is not as satisfying as the thick air in the tilted room although it makes her feel sick & muddled. After this, she puts her head in her hands & puts them down after; she is very obviously thinking intently about what all of this is & how it's going to work out. The video cuts back to the monitor view as she stares blankly into the distance & the disc returns back to the vlog menu & the video ends.