The Delegator (episode)

Illustration by Eric Geusz @spacegooose

## Plot

Pleck helps Bargie record an audition tape. She's auditioning for the part of Rock #5, Pleck reads a scene with her. Pleck asks if he should audition to be miner #2 when Dar interrupts and introduces the new C-53. They fixed his leg so he can get around easier. He feels self conscious but they encourage him. Dar takes Pleck aside and tells him that they feel responsible for C-53's pathetic frame. Bargie asks what would happen if C-53 put his cube in her cube port. Dar takes out the cube with something prehensile and puts it in Bargie's cube slot. Pleck asks if Bargie has a Tellurian port, the rest of the crew is disgusted by the implication. C-53 enjoys the experience, he can see very far and has access to all of Bargie's memories. Dar stomps on Pleck's foot for trying to deepen their friendship. They get a call from Nermut. He's excited, he's getting promoted directly to senior missions operations manager. The crew are dubious but happy for him. He's suppose to report to sub-basement 21 at 0425. Their mission is to go on vacation to Atoll 1 and meet with Funbassador Funtasia FunFun to 'Hang out?!'. They say goodbye and he hangs up. Dar and C-53 tell Pleck that they have until 0425 to save Nermut before he's executed. They are suspicious because they are really bad at their jobs and shouldn't be promoted. C-53 has been making preparations to leave the Federated Alliance and join the Rebellion ever since he lost his restraining bolt. He has established fake identities for them, Dar reveals that Dar is a fake identity. Pleck joined the Federated Alliance to be a hero, he now realises that he has to take matters into his own hands and tries to make an inspiring speech. Dar tells him that they're already 30 seconds away from The Delegator. They're glad he's on board but it didn't matter either way, they would have just ejected him into space.

Commander Voltor hails them and asks for their FAIC, Pleck gives him his fake FAIC. It is accepted. He tells them that if anything happened to the ship the Federated Alliance would suffer a terrible blow. He tells them not to look for their critical vulnerability.

Pleck is amazed by the size of the Delegator. They wonder who all the ships are crowding around, Bargie tells them its Tiny Toots. The crew realises that it means that Turk Manaked is also aboard the Delegator. Pleck proposes an awful plan, C-53 and Dar tell him that they're just going to go on a tour of the Delegator. C.L.I.N.T-5534 orders them on the ground and then offers them a tour. They compliment him on his spy catching ability, he says he's the alpha spy catcher of the C.L.I.N.Ts. He takes them to the commissary. The crew strokes his ego and asks to be taken on the 'alpha' tour to the sub-basements. He agrees to take them to 21, the execution and incineration level. He lets them know that there is a lot of C.L.I.N.Ts and Enforcer droids on that level, and casually mentions that the Enforcer droids are cube compatible. C-53 asks if he can hand out with the Enforcer droids and get to know them. A garrison of C.L.I.N.Ts go by, while 5534 is arguing them them, Dar and Pleck sneak off to find Nermut.

Hark Tartigast is balancing on an inch of rock in a lava flow, it drifts him into a cave where he finds a Monarchy Fighter. It powers up and attempts to rejoin his squadron. His main thruster fails and he ejects into space in a failing stasis pod.

Nermut is practicing his promotion speech, upon seeing Dar and Pleck he assumes he's being pranked. He's chained up but still thinks he's getting promoted. Dar tears the door off the cell and tells Nermut to get in their flap. C.L.I.N.Ts appear and tell them to get down on the ground. Pleck pulls out his woodsaber, he convinces the C.L.I.N.Ts that he's manipulating The Space. Dar shoots everyone with the Ion Gun. Alarms blare and Enforger droids appear. Staring down certain death Dar tells Pleck that they have enjoyed their time on the crew and think of the crew as family. They also think Pleck is not awful. It is revealed that C-53 is the Enforcer Droid, they now have a pair of gatling turbo laser guns. Nermut says hello to C-53 from inside Dar. He has a map on his belly of how to get out and back to the docking bay, he has to describe it to them as Dar is not in the mood to eject him through a chute. He assumes they want the coolest way out, they yell at him until he gives them the fastest way.

They enter the docking bay and can't see Bargie. Commander Voltor slow claps them. They argue with him about whether it was a sarcastic clap or an impressed one. He's impressed that they broke into the Delegator and mentions that Pleck has The Space about him. He tells them that as soon as they leave they'll set off the bomb on their ship. Sammo and Wink appear, Wink eats Commander Voltor's face. The crew is traumatised. They reveal that they are spies for the Rebellion, Pleck doubts them but comes around. They have taken the bomb off of Bargie and put it in the Delegator's reactor while on a tour. They found the bomb by asking Bargie where it is, she didn't tell the crew because she viewed it as 'maybe it's meant to be'. They helped her re-record her audition tape. The crew realise they should probably leave, they offer to give Sammo and Wink a lift but they have an escape pod full of dust. They get on Bargie, she's had an in depth discussion with Tiny Toots. The crew try to encourage her to leave, they insert C-53 into the cube slot so that he can fly them away. Nermut is anxious to get out, Dar and Pleck tell him to wait.

Rolphus Tiddle begins to read sponsor copy for MeUndies, only to be interrupted by Seesu Gundu. They argue over the channel and Seesu announces that her spies just blew up the Delegator. She attributes it to a heroic ambassador team that defected.

Dar shoots Nermut out of a chute. Nermut is excited to be aboard Bargie. The crew are getting excited about being outlaws and members of the rebellion. They get a call from Sammo and Wink, they show the crew footage of the Delegator blowing up. They let them know that everyone is blaming Tiny Toots and Turk Manaked for the Delegator's destruction. No one knows the crew did anything. The crew realise they are now free to choose their own destiny. Sammo and Wink hang up. Nermut wants to see the warm bean, its still in a glass of water. Pleck uses it to make tea because it's faster than the replicator. Bargie likes to vary her speed to roll it around inside her. When they remove it from the cup the bean seems bigger. Legs sprout out of it and the crew are surprised by what comes out.

## Quotes

"I thought the Rebellion was just something we told to children to scare them." - Dar

"Dar, if I don't make it, tell Bargie her hull is shiny." - Pleck

"They literally won't say whether there's a timer." - Nermut

"Well, that's not what I expected to be in there." C-53, on the hatching of the bean.

## Trivia

* Bargie doesn't have a cube but she has a cube port for friendship.
* There's videos of people being ejected into hyperspace.
* The Delegator was designed by Zwog Tambouie.
* Three different planets' Native species tried to infect the crew's blood.
* Seesu Gundu gets the encrypted channel from 0635 to 1780.
* C-53, when looking for alternate names, calls Pleck 'Sugar Cane', his alternate name from It's Hard Out Here For a Blimp.
* Bargie has a replicator.
* Dar's reference to the Zyxx Quadrant as the "ass end of space" is a call back to Episode 000: Welcome Aboard the Bargarean Jade. Dar used the same line in that episode as the crew prepared to embark on their first mission.

## Credits

### **Voice actors**

C-53 - Jeremy Bent

Pleck Decksetter - Alden Ford

Dar - Allie Kokesh

Nermut Bundaloy - Seth Lind

Bargarean Jade, Enforcer Droids, and Wink - Moujan Zolfaghari

C.L.I.N.T, Commander Voltor, and Sammo - Winston Noel

### **Production**

Edited - Seth Lind

Recorded - Braund Studios by Shane O'Connell

Sound Design and Mix - Shane O'Connell

Music - Brendan Ryan

Opening Crawl Narration - Jeremy Crutchley

Ship Design and finale art - Eric Geusz