The Man Who Married a Robot / Love Theme

## *A Brief Inquiry Into Online Relationships* chronology

**"The Man Who Married a Robot / Love Theme"** is the ninth track on The 1975's third studio album, *A Brief Inquiry Into Online Relationships*.

## Background

"The Man Who Married a Robot" acts as a sly sequel to "Fitter Happier," Radiohead’s doomsaying, robo-voiced nightmare from OK Computer. It sits atop a bed of treacly piano plinks, like a demented parody of a Facebook commercial that’s desperately trying to get you to log on again. In the end, the troll dies. The internet does not.

As it has been described by NME, this song is a poem narrated by Siri, a Vonnegut-like allegory about loneliness, data, social media and internet addiction, concerning a man, @SnowflakeSmasher86.

Matty revealed to Pitchfork that he intended for the script to be read by his father.

*"I was like, 'Fuck that, sounds lame.' And then we were like, 'Who should it be?' We just knew immediately. Because earlier this year, post-rehab, I was obsessed with the 2020s, like the idea that this next decade is going to be some retro-future kind of idea. I had, like, purple hair and an orange coat and I was like, 'Everything’s going to be fucking super future!' I was just on that kick. I was like, 'Robots, robots, robots.'"*
He says that he relates to the character, @SnowflakeSmasher86, "probably more than I’d like to."

*"It’s the acknowledgement of an already existing dystopian reality. It sounds like a warning of what a future could be, but you realize it’s exactly what we’re living in."*
The background instrumental track in the first half of this song was teased as the background music of numerous promotional videos for this album.

## Lyrics

**[Part I: The Man Who Married a Robot]**

**Spoken Word, Siri (British Male):**

This is a story about a lonely, lonely man. He lived in a lonely house. On a lonely street. In a lonely part of the world. But, of course, he had the internet. The internet, as you know, was his friend — you could say, his best friend. They would play with each other every day, watching videos of humans doing all sorts of things: Having sex with each other; Informing people on what was wrong with them and their life; Playing games with young children at home with their parents

One day, the man — whose name was @SnowflakeSmasher86 — turned to his friend, the internet, and he said, “Internet, do you love me?”

The internet looked at him and said, “Yes. I love you very, very, very, very, very, very much. I am your best friend. In fact, I love you so much that I never, ever want us to be apart ever again ever’

‘I would like that,” said the man. And so they embarked on a life together. Wherever the man went, he took his friend. The man and the internet went everywhere together, except of course the places where the internet could not go. They went to the countryside. They went to birthday parties of the children of some of his less important friends. Different countries. Even the moon. When the man got sad, his friend had so many clever ways to make him feel better. He would get him cooked animals and show him the people having sex again, and he would always, always agree with him. This one was the man’s favorite, and it made him very happy. The man trusted his friend so much. “I feel like I could tell you anything,” he said, on a particularly lonely day

“You can. You can tell me anything. I’m your best friend. Anything you say to me will stay strictly between you and the internet.”

And so he did. The man shared everything with his friend: All of his fears and desires; All of his loves, past and present; All of the places he had been and was going, and pictures of his penis. He would tell himself, “Man does not live by bread alone.”

And then he died

In his lonely house

On the lonely street

In that lonely part of the world

You can go on his Facebook

**[Part II: Love Theme]**

[Instrumental]

## Personnel

* **Composer:** Adam Hann, George Daniel, Matthew Healy, Ross MacDonald
* **Lyricist:** Adam Hann, George Daniel, Matthew Healy, Ross MacDonald
* **Associated performer:** Andy Crowley, Andy Parker, Andy Wood, Chris Allan, Chris Naron. Chris Laurence, Chris Worsey, Clare Jeffries, Dave Fuest, David Stewart, Debbie Widdup, Ed Tarrant, Emil Chakalov, Everton Nelson, Frank Ricotti, Gareth Hulse, Gavin McNaughton, George Daniel, Helen Kamminga, Ian Burdge, James Fountain, John Ryan, Jon Carnac, Kate Robinson, Kathy Gowers, Martin Humbey, Matt Ward, Matthew Healy, Natalia Bonner, Oli Langford, Owen Slade, Patrick Kiernan, Paul Edmund Davies, Perry Montague-Mason, Peter Lale, Rachel Bolt, Richard Berry, Rita Manning, Sam Swallow, Simon Baggs, Skaila Kanga, Sonia Slany, Sophie Harris, Stacey Watton, Tom Pigott-Smith
* **Basset clarinet:** Dave Fuest
* **Bassoon:** Gavin McNaughton
* **Bass trombone:** David Stewart
* **Cello:** Chris Allan, Chris Worsey, Ian Burdge, Sophie Harris
* **Clarinet:** John Carnac
* **Conductor:** Sam Swallow
* **Double bass:** Chris Laurence, Stacey Watton
* **Flute:** Paul Edmund Davies
* **French horn:** John Ryan, Richard Berry
* **Harp:** Skaila Kanga
* **Mastering engineer:** Robin Schmidt
* **Mixer:** Mike Crossey
* **Oboe:** Gareth Hulse
* **Percussion:** Chris Baron, Frank Ricotti
* **Piano:** Matthew Healy, Sam Swallow
* **Piccolo:** Clare Jeffries
* **Recording arranger:** Sam Swallow
* **Studio personnel:** Mike Crossey, Robin Schmidt
* **Synthesizer:** George Daniel
* **Trombone:** Andy Wood, Ed Tarrant
* **Trumpet:** Andy Crowley, James Fountain
* **Tuba:** Owen Slade
* **Viola:** Andy Parker, Helen Kamminga, Martin Humbey, Peter Lale, Rachel Bolt
* **Violin:** Debbie Widdup, Emil Chakalov, Everton Nelson, Kate Robinson, Kathy Gowers, Matt Ward, Natalia Bonner, Oli Langford, Patrick Kiernan, Perry Montague-Mason, Rita Manning, Simon Baggs, Sonia Slany, Tom Pigott-Smith

## References

1. ↑ https://pitchfork.com/reviews/albums/the-1975-a-brief-inquiry-into-online-relationships/
2. ↑ https://www.nme.com/reviews/album/1975-brief-inquiry-online-relationships-review