The Buyer -1 (Main Universe)

***The Buyer -1*** (Pronounced as “***Buyer Powered by The Negative One***” but is also known as “***Buyer Minus One***” or "***Buyer, Father of Buyer***”) is an curious and feenished part of The Buyer Bloodline. He is describe as a "Worlds Most Funnest Astronomer."

## Biography

### Early Life

Son to The Buyer-2 and Lynda, The Ultimate Warrior, The Buyer-1 had a ruff childhood. Never knowing his Mother (as his parents devoured on the same day he was born so his father could raise him in true Buyer fashion) and his only friend being the Robot D.E.S.P.A.I.R.E.R. who was programmed to love him with all its titanium heart, but it failed to do so, and threw constant abuse at him, much to The Buyer-2 amusement.

As a young man, he grew up totally evil, taken much amusement from others misery, however unlike most of his family, he gain a humorous side, preferring to pull pranks on his victims before plunging them in debt and total homelessness.

### Becoming Disfigured

At the age of 40, four days after his birthday, The Buyer-1 attend a cake festive it an attempted to ruining someones day by eating all there cake leaving non for others there. where he fell in a bath of Suger icing, which he was unbelievably allergic to. Leaving his Skin green, Gums blue, and losing his hear.

During his treatment, he met the Nurse, Willollolollolooooolololooooloo..... who got very attached to him. Dispute The Buyer-1 having no attachment to her, they quickly became a couple.

### Becoming a Father

Second after getting Married, He lost is virginity and Willollolollolooooolololooooloo..... became Pregnant, After 9 months of pure joy the loving couple had there Child, The Buyer. Sadly, when the baby was born, The Buyer-1 became an utter Twat again, the couple got a horrible devorsed before leaving the hospital where The Buyer-1 had full custody of the child.

He raised his Son to be pure Evil, and The Buyer Accomplice this in Spades. This led to The Buyer-1 developing a blood clot in his brain and Anus from refusing to let his son know how proud he was of him.

### Death

On 9th of July 1996, he was fighting with his arch-enemy’s, (need character) on top of a balcony. A push made The Buyer-1 trip and fell into a container of Super Sugar Icing.

He died in Hospital hours later, His last word were “Despairer is still alive!!!”

## Powers and Abilities

### Disabilities

* **Sugar Allergy** -
* **Milk Allergy** -
* **Lemon Allergy** -

## Relationships

### Family

* Father - Biological Ancestor
* Ug-lug Woopy Woopy Shine dine Lippy dippy soo-Da - Ancestor
* Ug-lug Woopy Woopy Shine dine Lippy dippy soo-Da The Second - Ancestor
* Ug-lug Woopy Woopy Shine dine Lippy dippy soo-Da The Third - Ancestor
* The Buyer⁻ℵ⁰ - Ancestor
* The Buyer-2 - Father
* Lynda, The Ultimate Warrior - Mother
* The Buyer - Son
* The Buyer² - Grandson

### Enemies

* Willollolollolooooolololooooloo..... - Ex-Wife
* D.E.S.P.A.I.R.E.R. - Friend turned Enemies
* The Flamboyent Pedo

## Appearances

In chronological order:

* (Information needed)

## Trivia

* He never met a man named Andrew. Despite half the people at his funeral we’re Andrews.
* He only had one Crap per day, this wasn’t deliberate or a condition, it was purely coincidental.
* Never got to see Avatar as he was dead

## Behind the scenes

* The character was created by: Adam Boyes