recursal/Fanatic-Fandom huggingface dataset:
DS9 624

*Baby Molly falls down a time well and comes back as a biting, clawing wild child. Not learning their lesson with Rugal, the O'Briens step up to the Anne Sullivan plate leaving poor Yoshi with Worf for adventures in babysitting.*

*With law school off the table thanks to her bar fight, the O'Briens agree to bust out unfrozen cavegirl Molly and send her back to a world that doesn't frighten or confuse her. Thankfully, stopping them doesn't seem a priority.*

## Show Bits

* Kevin Uxbridge
* Star Trek Caves
* The Scene Does Not Go Well Enterprise
* Episode Over-Cut to theme

## P1 Messages

From the Gootch

Raz and Plaveem
Trivia winnings

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Lieutenant Jones**

for not getting the right eye-lines in a pickup
Ben's pick is **Bottle Stabee**

for actually being stabbed by a bottle
## Trading Cards

If You Like "Cliffhanger" You'll Love ThisIt's A Good Thing I Made "Deposits" When I Was CorporealYou're Going To Want To Watch The "Tuvix" EpisodeWhere Are The Case Workers?The D Had An Arboretum. DS9 Has A CargoretumThis Is Going Great!"Computer: Eng Program" Does Not Go WellCan You Imagine If He'd Bobhalfed Her?
DS9 612

A painting of a matador fighting a bull

*We learn the real difference between "slips" & "strips" when Morn (KLANG) slips this Morn-tal coil and, like a reverse Nigerian prince scam, leaves Quark a fortune in latinum & a "striped" ex-wife in a hot tub crime machine.*

*Quark's in a real Maltese Mornhammer scenario with Morn's ex-heist buddies. But Morn gives them all the Goldfinger from the grave when the LootCrate shows up and, like all LootCrates, it's filled with crap they don't want.*

## Show Bits

* Mornhammer
* This Old Starship

## P1 Messages

Drunken Message

Psychic Predictions

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Rando at 7:40**

For not wanting to participate in the stage performance
Ben's pick is **Bajoran Women at 4:05**

For Thicc Boots
## Trading Cards

Of Course, Lurian Security's Symbol Is A Giant Set Of Balls!It's Like Tasha Yar's Funeral!A Very "Cheers" Memorial For A Very "Cheers" CharacterIf He Was A Seinfeld Man He'd Have Known You Don't Put A Hot Tub In An Apartment For Mold ReasonsShe's "Pulling Out" All The Sexy Lady TricksIf You're Lurian... What The Fuck Happened To Morn?This Isn't 'Star Trek: Picard!" We Don't Prescribe To Dismemberment As A Form Of Storytelling!We Finally Get Our Mexican StandoffHere's 10 Percent Of The Loot. I Have It In The Form Of Barf
Bangers

A banger is when everyone on screen staggers to the side and the camerapersons shake or bang on the camera. This ends up looking like the ship got hit by an asteroid, phaser, torpedo or being with godlike powers. I think this term was used in the very first episode. I'm not sure if it's an actual film industry name or it's Ben and Adam being weird.

Additional points are awarded to crew who spin as they fall, and extra bonus points to crew spinning in opposite directions. Kirk holds the highest score in this game.
DIS 310

Mirror Airiam

*You know what they say, spare the agonizer spoil the child. MUG tough loves Mirror Burnham back in line and has her literally cut all the traitorous friends out of her life, leaving only ex-boyfriend Lorca to go.*

*MUG and MUM mutually annihilate each other which snaps Georgiou back the ski resort where the OG Trek space-time butthole gives her a chance to get the hell out of here and be a new lead on Paramount+!*

## Show Bits

* MUG
* McLaughlin Group

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **MU Saru**

For going kill-crazy
Ben's pick is **MU Tilly**

For being underused
## Trading Cards

They Do Not Come To An Agreement About The Finer Points Of FascismKilly Likes Her JobWhat Mean "Expendable" Detmer?Wait! Is That Kevin Pollak? Carl? Jeffrey Combs???No One Expects The Kelpien ArmyThe Reboot Of The Terran Empire Does Not Go Well DiscoveryYou Built A Time Machine Out Of An Architecturally Salvaged Door?She's Off To Her New Television Series
DS9 622

*Jake and Nog hitch a ride behind enemy lines in a Little V crewed by cadets who've seen "SpaceCamp" far too many times. Looks like Red Squad isn't going to return the keys until they run out of gas.*

*Captain Tim is determined to take the U.S.S. License to Drive into combat in a move that's gonna make the Kolvoord Starburst look tame. Look's like Nova Squadron's gonna be out of the Academy doghouse.*

## Opening Segment

Always Doing Bits

Life Rules by Ben and Adam

## Show Bits

* Julian Bashir: Piss Freak
* This Old Starship
* For Some Reason Jake
* Bangers
* Admiral Belt Buckle
* Sabo

## P1 Messages

Happy anniversary

To FoD

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Zitty Crewman**

For having acne in the future
Ben's pick is **Dissenting Crewman**

For not chanting "Red Squad" with everyone else
## Trading Cards

The Mix Of "Technology" And "Wet" Is RevoltingBeamed Aboard By Chief Petty Officer Kelly ClarksonI Can't Take You Seriously With That Movie Poster In Your Office(Gulp!) Are You Upset About Something? Fucking Deal With It!I'm Three Years Older Than You And Can Squint In Incredulity. You Don't Control Me.What Kind Of A Perfect Future Is This?Shepard! Look At What You're Doing, Man!Everyone Gets A Taste Of The Girder!
DS9 703

*Worf's simple mind keeps saying "don't, don't don't, don't forget about Dax" as he walks on by Ezri. She's ready to go their separate ways with her back on the U.S.S. Steve Perry. Garak wishes everyone wouldn't stand so close to him!*

*Ezri cracks the code discovering Garak's breaking down because he's not happy being a Cardassian enigma machine for Starfleet. After some mild assault, Worf attempts to make peace with Ezri. Our review: Good idea. Shitty attempt.*

## Opening Segment

From the creators of The Greatest Discovery

## Show Bits

* K urn
* Vichy Frenchman
* Window Seduction

## P1 Messages

Promotional message: Dr. Who pod

Julian Bashir: Piss Freak
Thanks for recommending this pod

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **For Some Reason Jake**

for making a pass at a woman in front of his dad
Ben's pick is **Rando**

for ditching Morn
## Trading Cards

Have You Ever Seen Anyone Use This Door?He's Soprano-ing Out!Here's A Little Tip From Me To You. Keep It Dry Down ThereShe Pops The Mylar Balloon Of SeductionIt's The Counterpoint To Picard's Gazing WindowDo Worf's Meat Mittens Constitute A "Stand Your Ground" Situation? Can Bashir Shoot Him?He Does Hulkamania Style AlterationsShe Didn't Get The Ugly Cry Apology. That Won't Do, Worf
DS9 721

RSVP Solbor

*Bashir finally gets the gold from Odo but finds what's in the bucket is going bad! Kira takes a Wesley promotion to teach Rambo tactics to the Cardi rebellion. Dukat gets Ralphied by the Pah-wraiths for peeking at their centerfold!*

*Gowron tells Martok to move his desk down to storage because he's going full Cobra Commander with the Klingon war machine. Bashir learns Starfleet watched "I, Borg" and gave Odo terminal dandruff to spread to the Founders!*

## Show Bits

* McLaughlin Group
* Admiral Belt Buckle
* Sicks Bay
* Julian Bashir: Piss Freak
* The Single Brass Instrument Of Subtext
* The Scene Does Not Go Well Enterprise
* Star Trek Caves

## P1 Messages

To Adam and Ben

To Adam and Ben

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **O'Brien**

For goofing off
Ben's pick is **Solbor**

For not writing a letter to be sent in the event of his death
## Trading Cards

We Could Have Spent An Entire Episode In This MomentYou Can Practiaclly Hear Sixpence Non The Richer In The Background!Odo has The Flake. The Only Course Of Treatment Is A Lobotomy.It's Gonna Take More Than Visine To Get That Red Out!He Can't Do Romulan Ale. No Way He Does The Palm Cut Without Fainting!He Gets Ensign Thank You For Holding You Call Is Very Important To UsIt's The Flaaaaake!They Have The Look That Says The New Manager Has Never Been To Their Neighborhood Before
Glass Top Coffee Tables

Standard Star Fleet quarters require a minimum of 2 glass tables.

## Pod Apperances

Special:WhatLinksHere/Glass Top Coffee Tables

Several episodes of TNG there have been glass top coffee tables broken in hand to hand combat. The inclusion of a glass top table telegraphs a potential fight.

More recently, the existence of a Glass Table Union has been speculated on.
DS9 424

Poster by J.J. LendL

*Bashir, Dax & Kira find hu-mons suffering from Highlander 2 disease. Bashir sets out to retcon them back to a pure origin movie state. Dr. Kurgan says none of the past director's cuts worked. There can be only one solution: death.*

*Bashir's Quickening (DUN DUN DUN) treatment has a "Miri" effect but a less successful outcome. Refusing defeat, Bashir (metaphorically) drops his combadge and goes Dr. Kwai Chang Caine on the disease.*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Bashir**

Doing street magic medicine
Ben's pick is **Epran**

Behaving like he was being payed off to be impressed
## Trading Cards

This Is Not A Warrior's Mug!He Injects Her Before He Tricorders Her! Big Leap!A Mixologist... Of Death!This Is How You Make Pottery As A GhostThe Quickening (Dun Dun Dun) Has Quickened!That's Unconsentual Mustard!Weird Angle! Where Is This Baby Coming From?He "Lion King's" The Blight Free Baby
DIS 103

Poster by J.J. LendL

Shuttlecraft are DangerousSpock Box

*Burhnam gets work release to solve why Disco's sister ship got Clive Barkered.*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Tilly**

For her nervous energy
Ben's pick is **The Klingon who hushes the Starfleet officers on the Glenn**

For being incongruous as a Klingon, like he was in a horror movie
## Trading Cards

Cast As The Hella Disposable PilotLooks Pretty NiceWhy Are They Allowed To Eat With Everyone Else?I'm Named After The Card Daddy!Why Is There A Drool Breath Device There?!?!That's A Radical Tone Shift!A Real "Event Horizon" MomentHe Puts Her In The Dollar Bill Booth
DS9 Game: History of Roll Outcomes

## Summary Statistics

* Total rolls: 153
* Most frequent outcome: 1
* Longest runs of repeated rolls: [111] and [111] in March and December 2018
* Most frequent square landed on: Square 45 (5 times); "Chula!"

## Adam's Statistics

* Total rolls: 75
* Most frequent outcome: 1
* Longest runs of repeated rolls: [111] December 2018, [222] in June-July 2019

## Ben's Statistics

* Total rolls: 78
* Most frequent outcome: 5
* Longest run of repeated rolls: [666] in Aug-Sept 2018
DS9 Board Game (Game of Buttholes)

```
This page is outdated.
See Game of Buttholes/Will of the Caretaker

```

Deciding that Episode Vetoes were a bad idea for DS9, (both because they weren't familiar enough with the episodes and in practice from TNG), but still wanting a game element in the next episode section: Ben & Adam decided to introduce an element for random drunkenness.

## Game of Buttholes

Starting with season two of DS9, Ben and Adam decided to change things up by employing a Chutes/Snakes and Ladders style board game with various "traps" resulting in possible podcast themes. At the end of each episode, the virtual die is rolled, and Ben and Adam advance as many spaces on the board, resulting in either a blank tile or an action tile to be carried out in the next episode's review. The original board ran from episodes 197-227, when they completed the run at space 100. A new board was designed starting on episode 228, which added some new spaces and changed the layout, and it ran until episode 258. A new reset began on episode 259, which added three new squares, which replaced a Traveler, Quark's Bar, and Banger space on the board.

The initial odds/calculations for each action tile being rolled were calculated by a very devoted FoD, and can be viewed here:

DS9 Board Game: How Likely Is Each Square?

Statistics on the actual rolls were also tabulated and summarized at:

DS9 Board Game: History of Roll Outcomes.

The board game and accompanying key for the action tiles can be viewed here:

Game of Buttholes: The Will of the Prophets

The list of moves made on the game board so far can be found in the Deep Space Nine Episode List.

## Older Versions

New Buttholes Ahoy! (Board used from episodes 228-258)Buttholes of Fate Await (Board used from episodes 197-227)
## Season 1 Drunkisode Game

The first season of Ben and Adam's coverage of Deep Space Nine included (about ten episodes in), Ben rolling a virtual die to see if they would have to have a drunk episode to follow. Since there were 15 remaining episodes when they began, the "winning" roll would be a one out of fifteen (something they achieved once, on the first try).
DS9 515

Tora Ziyal and Elim Garak embrace each other after his escape

*The butthole explodes with Jem'Hadar-ahreaa seeping toward Cardassia! Worf puts up his Frank Dux. Garak plays Sgt. Kinchloe to break out of the Klink. In a Roth-level surprise, Gowron rejoins Starfleet's Ketracel kicking club.*

*Every available AMT model in the quadrant is parked at DS9 but it turns out they've been catfleeted by the Dominion so Golden Bashir can wipe them out with a changeling supernova, a changeling supernova.*

## Show Bits

* Sabo
* Klingon Dong Redundancy

## P1 Messages

thanks for being a friend

thanks for being a spouse

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Ikat'ika**

For being the only Jem'Hadar with a code of honor
Ben's pick is **Sisko**

For deciding to destroy a runabout on very little information
## Trading Cards

Don't Like Their ChancesGreat News, Cardassians. You're Going Home. Well, Except You, GarakHow Fucking Hard Is It To Be Michael Dorn?Do You Want To Admiral Hanson It Or Reboot Khitomer?Hood Class?!?! There's No Way DeSoto's Near This SceneMutual Vaporization1 1/2 Minutes That'll Blow Your Hair Back!You're Gonna Be A Series Regular, Martok
## Transcript

Official Maxfun Transcript
DS9 601

*Sisko slaps on Lord Kril headgear & burrows behind Dominion lines in a Trojan Tick with a delivery for the White plant straight from Gasoline Falls. Dukat is crossing HR lines with Kira who isn't impressed with his ball handling.*

*It's been a Ketracel White, hot Dominion summer for the Federation. With most of Starfleet burning in space, Dukat surely leaving "white" all over his office thinking about Kira, & Joe's subspace scowl it's looking bad for Sisko.*

## Show Bits

* Star Trek Haircast
* Julian Bashir: Piss Freak
* W/r/t
* Rolling the nacels between thumb and forefinger
* Kevin Uxbridge
* Episode Over-Cut to theme
* The Scene Does Not Go Well Enterprise

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Jake**

For his incongruity about there not being a freedom of press.
Ben's pick is **O'Brien**

For doing bits
## Trading Cards

He's Grown Out A Great Pageboy In Just Three MonthsWeyoun Fucking HAAAAATES Damar!Even Quark Can't Get Them To Fight For Their Right To PartyAnd Why Has It Been Three Months Since You've Seen Jake?Can You Fly A Russian Helicopter?Kira Is Not There To Play BallIt Looks Like Ben And Adam Playing Star Trek VROf Course My Math Is Right. We Have Plenty Of Time To Escape...
DS9 403

Poster by J.J. LendL

*Picard gets zapped by a probe... I mean, Sisko get zapped by Worf lightning & fades. This sets Picard...I mean, Jake on a new life of getting Picard back to the Entrepreneur.. I mean, getting his dad back.*

*As Jake gets older and turns into one of the coolest character actors ever, he keeps failing to capture his dad's Force ghost. The only way to break the Etienne/Isabeau hawk and wolf loop is to kill himself instead of the Bishop.*

## Show Bits

* Picosby
* Jazz Horse
* Bangers
* Worf Lightning
* Worf Yelp Reviews
* The Blue Beverage Of Subtext

## P1 Messages

Promotional Message: Promotional Messages

To Adam and Ben

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Old Jake's Headband**

For being jarring and standing out when it shouldn't
Ben's pick is **Melanie**

For self-inflicting a head wound for attention
## Trading Cards

Have You Not Seen "Ferris Bueller"?Just Sort Of Blurs AwayGood Commander. Nice StationWell, This Doesn't Change My LifeAppears Like The Red Baron Pizza ManOlded Up The Entire CastInto The MatrixThey're Just Sex Raps Lyrics
DS9 101

*Instead of therapy, Starfleet sends A Man Called Hawk to renovate its newest flip at Planet Nose Loaf. Sisko Borg-shames Pipes, meets Bajor's Long Island Medium and goes space trippin' all before lunch! Finally, the space butthole is the star of the show! And it's got space polyps living inside!*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Sisko**

For his crazy acid-trip delusion experiences
Ben's pick is **Thief who throws a mace**

For how slowly he steals while Nog runs point
## Trading Cards

First Officer Of Some Fucking Doomed ShipA Foreclosed On HomeAdam's TypeUsing Maces! That's FunWe've Met. You Were Locutusing Around!You Can't Just Have The Sand. You Gotta Have The Sugar!Straight From Her Job In Medieval TimesIs Seems Pleasurable To Go InThey Have The Same Hair!The Big Reveal!She's On Planet Edo! He's In Anybody Canyon!Returned To Fuck With It Later
DIS 207

Poster by J.J. LendL

*While Disco checks out a big blue record skip in space. Burnham returns to Vulcan to engage the Olly Olly Spock-en Free protocols but Amanda is ready to use Lethal Weapon 2 levels of diplomatic immunity to keep him.*

*Pike and Tyler use the scientifically cautious method (sarcasm inserted here) of shooting crap at a lens flare and get low-grade Time Squared! Burnham and Georgiou stage some Carl Douglas theater on the Section 31 flagship.*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Ash Tyler**

For beating the tentacle with a wrench
Ben's pick is **Leland**

Being no match for Georgiou
## Trading Cards

He's Cool Dad, But Not Cooler Than AshLooks Like Where They Shoot Peloton Bike CommercialsAn Open Floor Plan Was IllogicalHiding In The JJ CavesSome Tentacular UpgradesDo The Math! Beam On Board!Not Looking A Gift Beatdown In The MouthSees The Wrong QR Code
DS9 218

Bangers done by hand

*DS9 rescues a Cardassian Harriet Tubman who turns out to be the girl who used to get Quark's eggplant emojis. But she's not "up" for him unless he's down for helping her get over the fence and out of town.*

*It's scales and lobes all the way down when Quark tells loafy Kristin Shepard he'll get her latchkeys out if she shoots him with her love gun - forever! Oh, Quark. You should never mix business with ear-based pleasure!*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Engineer in cargo bay wide shot carrying coffee offering**

Ben's pick is **Garak**

For biting a thread with his teeth
## Trading Cards

Quark Kind Of Likes ThatNot Served With Ice?How Does He Get Up Here?I Would Know If That's OdoA Risk With That Much LoafDoes She Have A Scaly Man In A Canoe?This Scene Directed By Quentin TarantinoWhen Cardassia Is Democratic, I'm Gonna Fuck The Shit Out Of You!
DS9 621

*Forgetting they can watch old episodes of the show, someone lets Sisko into a cave with some relics and, SURPRISE!!! He gets Prophet zapped! He's told he has to get a stone Speak & Spell working to prepare for the coming of Gozer.*

*Sisko gets his rocks off and sets off a non-blue portal throwdown between Prophet Kira and Pagh Wraith Jake! It's celestial arc reactors blasting with the station, a minor writing career and a relationship Adam hates on the line!*

## Show Bits

* Chaotic Bro
* Star Trek Caves
* For Some Reason Jake
* Admiral Belt Buckle
* Bangers
* Mr. Bajoran Relic

## P1 Messages

To Ben and Adam

Ankylosaurus
To the future

K urn
Julian Bashir: Piss Freak
## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Kai Wynn**

for using technology she can't possibly understand
Ben's pick is **Kira**

for having a hotel continental breakfast fruit salad
## Trading Cards

Adam Blacked Out During This SceneTouching The Display Is A Crucial Archaeological MistakeIs This What Passes For Outdoor Dining On DS9?You Didn't Replace The Tablet With A Bag Of Sand! There Are Boulders Rolling All Over Bajor!You Want To Sit And Talk With Mr. Tablet? Wait...What Are You Doing?!?! NO!!!!!!!!The Relic Was Filled With Farts The Whole Time!Real "Big Trouble In Little China" VibesHow Did She Know How To Stop Us??? She Can't Set The Clock On Her VCR!!!
MOVIE 002

*Ben and Adam made good on #GreatestGenKhan with a tour that forever scarred the legacy of the most beloved Trek movie.*

*Kirk's got the Academy Driver's Ed class out when his baby mama calls about torpedo custody. His old buddy Khan (the real one) has Jaked Chekov's Del Sol and is rolling for Regula!*

*Kirk does the Jeep wave & Khan punches him in his rich Corinthian leather! He wants the full Peter Gabriel & Phil Collins discography from Kirk but Kirk gives him an old Napster link.*

*Kirk makes it to space Fantasy Island but Mr. Roarke grabs Genesis while Chekov and Terrell almost kill them due to "Nubbins Mark 1." The Enterprise and Reliant go full Red October!*

*Khan Tupolevs Genesis! Spock jumper cables the Enterprise to escape by the skin of Kirk's toupee. But Spock dead! Will the box office save him? Put Adam & Ben on tour again 2 find out!*

## Tour Dates

**2018-2019 Dates**

* May 17 - North Door in Austin, TX
* May 18 - Sons of Herman Hall in Dallas, TX
* Aug 03 - Club Vinyl in Las Vegas, NV
* Aug 23 - Sixth & I Synagogue in Washington, DC
* Aug 24 - Bell House in Brooklyn, NY
* Aug 25 - Mass MoCA in North Adams, MA
* Aug 28 - Pittsburgh, PA
* Aug 29 - Boston, MA
* Aug 30 - Atlanta, GA
* Aug 31 - Ferndale, MI
* Oct 03 - Great Hall in Toronto, ON
* Oct 04 - Vancouver, BC
* Oct 19 - Mission Theater in Portland, OR
* Oct 20 - Vera Project in Seattle, WA
* Nov 02 - Lincoln Hall in Chicago, IL
* Nov 03 - Cedar Cultural Center in Minneapolis, MN
* Nov 30 - Alamo Drafthouse in Denver, CO
* Dec 01 - Lawrence, KS
* Dec 07 - Bootleg Theater in Los Angeles, CA
* Jan 16 - Sketchfest, San Francisco, CA

## Special Dispensation

To promote future live events the DC Recording is made available to the public. MaxFun donors have access to the **Atlanta Recording** of this show.

## Trading Cards

All Our Favorite Characters Die!King Shit Small Town Theater DirectorThe First Year They Made The Del SolHe Loves Watching It Go InWait!!!!!!Bad News Delivered With A Smile Is Worse NewsYou Don't Have To Use Your Eye, Do You?Spock: Interesting Premise McCoy: What The Fuck!!!Yah Ghanna Wanna Take Out The Shapports Whare The Nhacelles Mheat The BoadyHey Kirk! Great News!Punch In The Garage Door Code And Shoot These Fuckers!9 Fingers Holding 2 Halves Of A Body TogetherAdam And Ben Stared Wordlessly At The Replica For 45 Minutes At STLVHe Gets Kirk's Gherkin!It's Probably Been So Long Since Joachim Cranked ItSubmarine Movie!Punch In The Go Code, Let It RunLooks Right At The Orville Redenbacher Bag!The Day Is Saved!Brando!
DS9 418

Poster by J.J. LendL

Canadian Workplace PSARon Canada
Jazz Horse

*Worf takes out a Klingon charter bus while protecting a Cardassian mercy mission from off-color Birds of Prey. The Klingons want to spin this into a reverse Tonkin and dispatch Ron Canada to hand Worf a warrior's conviction.*

*Ch'Pok uses a mix of "look at me during" flashbacks and Chang screaming to prove Worf's writing "I 'heart" Ben Maxwell" on his captain's log. But Sisko smells a vole when the SS Skid Row's manifest turns up covered in Wite-Out.*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Courtroom bell**

For being cut-away from
Ben's pick is **Quark**

For not being able to tell the difference between Bashir and Morn
## Trading Cards

This Is What A Tease Is!One Fang Hang!Your Position Is Horsey Thicc Killed Himself?!?!Canadian Workplace PSAHe's Concentrating On The Wrong ThingsHe's Enlisted! He Never Gets The Big Chair!Expert Klingon LawyeringDrops The Ipad "Gotcha" Moment
DS9 517

Planet 10 Shipping label from the Star Trek Encyclopedia (3rd ed., p. 148)

*A Janie Mnemonic winds up in Odo's custody for jacking some data and a security deposit violation by her partner. But it's not her jacking that's got Odo worked up. It's the jacking he wants to do because she's pretty!*

*Odo sentences Arissa to some serious "hard time" under his personal supervision. After she rocks his bucket he rocks her assassins to sleep. But instead of soundtrack to sexy time she gets reverse "50 First Dates."*

## Opening Segment

RSVP Rene Auberjonois

Thankfulness

## Show Bits

* Julian Bashir: Piss Freak
* Honeysticks
* Barroom Eyes To Opening Credits
* The Single Brass Instrument Of Subtext

## P1 Messages

Karaoke applause

Eggplant emoji

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **O'Brien**

For passive-aggressively staying in holosuite character
Ben's pick is **Odo**

For getting angry at Arissas' handler for giving a spy a dangerous job
## Trading Cards

How Do You Clean A Phase Vaped Carpet?Not Everyone's Exicited To Be In His Jack FantasyShe's Got A Data Port VDWe Don't See Him Flintstoning His LegsNo Plausible Face But Realistic NipplesOdo Goes A-Team!It's Weird To Be Adding Memories Instead Of Taking ThemI, And My Wrecked Vag, Will Never Forget You
## Transcript

Official Maxfun Transcript
Benjamin Ahr Harrison

A Host and His Dog

Benjamin Ahr Harrison is one of the co-hosts of The Greatest Generation. He grew up watching Star Trek: TNG on Channel 44 in Oakland, CA, which came on at 6 pm every night. He was only allowed to watch one hour of television per day, and he had to be done with his homework before he watched, so Star Trek: TNG is pretty much the only television show he's familiar with.

Twitter: @BenjaminAhr
Gremlins

*Randall Peltzer is the Red Green of inventors. When he finds an limbed tribble in Gov. Cory's bodega he sneaks it out & transplants it to the most dangerous land - the suburbs.*

*Gizmo's new family handles him with the level of attention most do clicking the "I Agree" terms on a shareware download. While the Peltzers revel in various household bukkake a series of easily avoidable events are about to change everything.*

*Billy's disregard for feeding, hygiene and vitamin D limits has unleashed a wave of puppet-based homicide on the town! With so many Gremlins and not enough Lynn Peltzers channeling Ellen Ripley, Kingston Falls is about to go full LV-426!*

*The Gremlins are tearing though the town with "Naked Gun" levels of enthusiasm. When they all take a break to catch a flick, Billy & Kate use the chance (and a disregard of physics) to change the reels from "Snow White" to "Apocalypse Now."*

*Stripe tries to "Dirty Harry" Billy but gets Nosferatued by Gizmo. With that, the town is in flames...I mean, back to normal. Mr. Wing repos Gizmo for warranty void & the Peltzers somehow escape all homicide charges. Merry Christmas to all!*

## Special Dispensation

Available for public download as a Holiday Gift

## Trading Cards

A White People Fever Dream Of ChinatownLike If Your Toothbrush Was A Rolling PinDistractingly Attractive Despite Wearing A Tea KoozieYou Don't Have To Drink Killians If You Don't Want ToThat's A Garbage Picture, Lynn!A Claymore Mine Filled With OrangesRandall's Into FacialsDick Millering The Whole Thing UpReplaced With Xenomorph PodsThe Mayhem Has Commenced!That's Too Much FrostingImpossibly Gory For A Holiday FilmAdam Laughed And Laughed!Kingston Falls Favorite Santa Taken Down!Frantically Tending Bar!Insulting To ProjectionistsSomehow SteerableA Vampyric Disgusting Death SceneBarney Doesn't Try To Eat ItIt Appears He Found Kingston Falls On Foot
DS9 505

Deep Space 9 fires a chroniton beam.

*Keiko's back from a business trip &, unlike Vegas, what happens in the Fire Caves doesn't stay in the Fire Caves. She's picked up a nasty DS9TD that's willing to boil Molly in a pot if Miles doesn't put her on his phone plan.*

*Wife Swap Keiko wants Miles to send a 1.21 jigawatt eviction notice to the space butthole! To avoid multiple counts of Prophetcide, he and Rom have to point at a lot of electrical tape and give her the Highlander treatment.*

## Show Bits

* (Butt)Hole Closer
* Ankylosaurus
* Sabo
* McLaughlin Group
* Eyes to Commercial
* Worf Lightning

## P1 Messages

Commercial message

Personal message

Kevin Uxbridge
## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Rosalind Chao**

For having the most fun getting her own episode
Ben's pick is **Rom**

For getting the shits from bacon
## Trading Cards

Who Would Water Them With Pure Urine?Daniel Day-Lewis Couldn't Do ThatHe Has To Be Curious About Fucking A Pah~WraithAss Over Tea-Kettle At The Creep Rail!Shoving Engineering Dildos Into Tight PlacesHis Head Mimics His ButtcrackHe'd Have Been Punching Pudding A Couple Of Eps AgoShe Lays Waste To Dorn's Lightning Performance
## Transcript

Official Maxfun Transcript
DS9 205

Julian Bashir: Piss Freak

*This is a story all about how Rugal's life got flipped-turned upside down. He got in one little bite and Sisko got scared. He said "You're livin' with Keiko and a racist so there!"*

*Rugal just shows up in O'Brien's apartment. Garak appears in Bashir's apartment. It's clear Cardassians don't share any genetics with Klingons 'cause they got no trouble getting through doors at all!*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Garak**

For the orphanage scene
Ben's pick is **Garak**

For waking Bashir up by just \*being\* in his room
## Trading Cards

It Doesn't Smell Like Pee Or AasparagusVery Reasonably Defends HimselfThis Dude Has A Weird StoryThe Worst Household He Could Possibly Be Put InNeither Are Willing To Engage Their Bowls Of StewProximity Alarm!He's Wearing Red So You Can Tell Them ApartGood Luck, Or, Whatever
DS9 526

A single self-replicating mine.

*Happy 300th episode #GreatestGen! The Dominion is ready to take the A Quad co-op & they're tired of waiting to buy out Bajor. Sisko's had enough of the backdoor politics & plugs the space butthole turning DS9 into a flared base of resistance.*

*Sisko enacts the Alamo Protocols on the Dominion/Cardi fleet! It's not enough so he leaves the water running & bails. Will he get his baseball back? Why didn't Starfleet send Ben Maxwell for this? Tune in next season to find out!*

## Show Bits

* Chris Brynner of Brynner Information Systems
* Mount Armus
* Ankylosaurus
* The Little D
* Eyes to Commercial
* McLaughlin Group
* Worf Lightning

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Rom**

For saying "Now?!" about approaching Sisko to perform his marriage.
Ben's pick is **Rom**

For saying "I have to go to 'waste extraction'".
## Trading Cards

She Does Not Say Yes To The DressI'm Going To Table Asking You Out Until After The War, OK?You Know He Just Wants To GagIt's Like How Some People Don't Look Good Wearing HatsShields Holding Against All Expectations!A Shit Ton Of Worf Lightning Bricks The Station!I Feel Like I Forgot SomethingLoaded With Galaxys And Hood Class That Don't Want To Be There
## Transcript

Official Maxfun Transcript
DS9 719

Chill hang

*The honeymoon may have just started for Sisko and Kasidy but it's over for Damar and Weyoun when the Dominion starts a thrupple with the Breen that leaves the Cardassians out of being big OR little spoons! Oh, the irony!*

*It's break up, break neck and break out for Worf and Ezri with an assist from freshly scorned Damar! Kai Winn learns she's been Prophetfished and decides she's Sith and tired of The Sisko getting all the good hookups!*

## Show Bits

* Ball Kicking Machine
* Worf Hates Doors
* The Scene Does Not Go Well Enterprise
* Ankylosaurus

## P1 Messages

Promotional Message: Podcast

To the Godfathers

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Louise Fletcher**

For expanding the range of Kai Winn
Ben's pick is **Weyoun**

For doing bits in public
## Trading Cards

She Sucks It In Like Ben Getting His Picture Taken In A Bathing SuitAre You Kidding, Weyoun? I Have A Problem With Alcohol! Not Reading Contracts!I Assume My Wedding Invitation Must Have Been Lost In The MailA Post Coital Fruit Platter With No Honeydew Speaks Well Of The Accommodations On DS9Never Argue With Who Prepares Your Food! She's Getting Ghost Chilis!Will Worf Do This Every Time Bashir's Name Comes Up?The Boots She's Been Licking Belong To The Pag-Wraiths!Damar Makes Sure We Never Learn How Cardassians Execute Their Prisoners
DS9 113

Benjamin Sisko, surrounded by the Ennis and Nol-Ennis

*Kai Opaka convinces Sisko to load up the runabout "Truckster" for a quick trip to Wally Wormhole, but the Holiday Road turns into a dead (almost) end.*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Lady reacting to Kai Opaka**

At 40:30, woman in background strongly rejects Opaka's offer of help
Ben's pick is **Kai Opaka**

At 10:20, Opaka licks her lips in anticipation of the imminent crash
## Trading Cards

It's Depressing How Far Laptops SlidePicked It Up At Claire'sReal Big Grief ActingTried To Cut His Hair With An AxePreviously Dead!Pulls An Epiphany Like A QuarterHe Might Be Neil BreenFuck You! Stay Out Of Our Business!
DS9 607

## Deprivation is First Base

Flags of the Klingon Empire, United Federation of Planets and Bajoran government.

## Game of Buttholes

### Landed on

29
35

## DS9 607

### Next Episode

Are You There Prophets? It’s me, The Sisko
Vagrant Bareil

*With the Cardis evicted it's time to tie some boots that make guns & prune cans to the station & get Worf & Dax married! With the Entrepreneur out of bachelor party range it's up to the D Team to murder the donkey show!*

*Marrying Worf's not sending her through a glass table like K'Ehleyr but Dax is getting chopped up! The gagh hits the fan after Dax belts Sirella. The wedding safety protocols are off! Oh, and Odo and Kira...never mind.*

## Show Bits

* The Scene Does Not Go Well Enterprise
* Ball Kicking Machine
* K urn
* Bad Bit Moment
* For Some Reason Jake
* The Single Brass Instrument Of Subtext
* The Little D
* Food's Back On The Menu Boys!
* W/r/t

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **The Ending of the episode**

For everything about it being fun
Ben's pick is **Rom**

For freaking out at the fire dance
## Trading Cards

Sisko's Jovial About The Lack Of Belt Buckles In SightWe Couldn't Afford The TNG Cast So You're My Bachelor PartyA Boob Windowless Klingon. It Feels Wrong And BadIn Honor Of Your Uncle Kurn, Who Doesn't Exist, You May Not Eat That!Sloppy "Brazier" Placement? I Thought You Were Talking About My BraDid You Have A 3-Way With Atoa And Morn...Again?Together-sies?!?!?!If You Were Worried We Weren't Going To Get A Boob Window, Worry No More!
DS9 409

Poster by J.J. LendL

(Butt)Hole Closer

*Kor is back! Armed with just some Klingon Kleenex & a warrior's liver he's off to find Kahless' potsticker. Dax & Worf sign on as Willie & Short Round & the trio cross the seal. But Guido Duras returns to Belloq the sword.*

*The sword gives Kor & Worf real competing Trumpification vibes. Dax ends the 4 dick swinging long enough for them to axe handle Duras Jr. Then they beam the sword into space! Which surely lodged in Ira Graves' torpedo coffin.*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Kor**

For saying "No doubt" in response to be told it was an honor to meet him
Ben's pick is **Soto the Lethean**

Being a a dumb and bad fighter
## Trading Cards

Only Levar Burton Could Use A "Code Of Honor" PropA Two-Ingredient Cocktail Is PreferredA Full Night Of Craps And Hooves?Most Are Plywood Spray Painted SilverAyyy! I'm Tryin' To Steal Your Bat'leth Here!Some Camping. Some KillingKira And Dukat Brought The Hole CloserBad Firearm Safety PracticesThis Is Insane! Right?
Drunk Shimoda

## Pod Apperances

Special:WhatLinksHere/Drunk Shimoda

If you just want the Voyager ones it's here: Drunk Shimoda: Voyager

Drunk Shimoda is a reference to TNG episode 3, "The Naked Now," where engineer Jim Shimoda is so inebriated by a virus that he removes all the isolinear chips from the engineering systems. Like a drunk baby, he is so oblivious to the consequences of his actions that he playfully stacks them while the ship counts down to destruction. This sublime state of delirious self-expression was so touching to Adam and Ben that they created a designation honoring each episode's character who most embodied his spirit.

## Shimoda Power Rankings

* See Drunk Shimoda: The Next Generation for the complete list of TNG scores.
* See Drunk Shimoda: Deep Space Nine for the complete list of DS9 scores.
* See Drunk Shimoda: Voyager for the ongoing list of Voyager scores.
* See Drunk Shimoda: Discovery for the ongoing list of Disco scores.
* See Drunk Shimoda: Original Series for OG shimodas
* See Edward Larkin: Picard for the rebranded shimodas
* See Edward Larkin: Lower Decks for minor shimodas

## Bonus Episodes

There are 6(?) additional Shimodas which can only be known by Maximum Fun donors. Donate here to find the Drunk Shimodas to the secret bonus episodes on *Star Trek: Generations* and *Crimson Tide*. The *Premature Assimilation Tour* featured Drunk Shimodas from *Star Trek: First Contact* as well, but the author didn't remember who they were.
DS9 Board Game: How Likely Is Each Square?

## Summary

I was curious: in the 156 podcast episodes for which the DS9 board game is being played, how many times would we expect to land on particular board squares?

I simulated 100,000 complete podcast runs (i.e. 156 podcast episodes, simulated 100,000 times) using Python (source code is here), playing out the board game for each run. Here's what I found.

 How many non-drunk special episodes are expected?
 How many trips to visit each other (Looking At Each Other During) are expected?
 How many live streamed episodes (Fuck It! We'll Do It Live!) are expected?

## Method And Assumptions

* I calculated 156 turns through the entire duration of GG DS9, as follows:
	+ The first die roll was during episode 197, Space Butthole Curriculum (S01E19).
	+ There are 26 episodes per DS9 season from 2 through 7.
	+ There will be one turn for every episode except S07E26.
	+ Thus, there's 1 turn in S01, 26 turns in each of S02 through S06, and 25 turns in S07.
* If the piece moves to a space butthole square, I assume the butthole is followed immediately: the next podcast episode will use the square that results from following the butthole.
* Rolls that would move beyond square 100, land on square 100 instead. (For example, on board square 97, if a 4 is rolled, I assume the move is to square 100.)
* Suppose at the end of podcast X, the piece moves to square 100. Then, I assume at the end of podcast X+1, the piece moves to square 1 (i.e., there is no die roll: the game starts over). At the end of podcast X+2, I assume the die is rolled once again.

## Detailed Results

In the tables below, the "10-90% likely range" is the number of times we'd expect to land on a square in 80% of the 100,000 podcast runs (specifically, the 10th and 90th percentiles of the number of times we visit a particular square). For example, here's how many times we landed on "Looking At Each Other During":

 1
 2
 3

The numbers in the "Count" cells add to 100,000. The 10th percentile of those "Times" values is 0, and the 90th is 3, but in about 4.5% of podcast runs, Ben and Adam will have to visit each other four times or more.

### Drunkisode square occurrences

 Mornhammered
 Quark's Bar
DS9 715

Bashir holding a coonskin cap.

*Vic's program gets a mobster trope virus that takes over his casino and boots him out into the holo streets! Can the crew pull a fix-it caper before Vic winds up sleeping with the digital fishes?*

*With the alcohol and cigarette smoking protocols disengaged, the swingingest crew in Starfleet grabs the cash, saves the day, and shows they've got a captain that could win Karaoke night on the Hood!*

## Show Bits

* Hoofs
* For Some Reason Jake
* Episode Over-Cut to theme
* Loaf

## P1 Messages

From SF Greatest Gen Con II

To Rocket Scientist

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Chief O'Brien**

For letting himself be strip searched by holograms
Ben's pick is **Nog**

For the closeup of him practicing safe-cracking
## Trading Cards

Not A Great Way To Start Your Holo DayOdo Is Shockingly Horny With All Those Ladies Shifting ShapeDidn't You Play Vance Duke?Reservior Dogs WalkYou're Not The Regular Guy! You're A Warrior's Bean Counter!He Comes From A Moneyless Society But He Knows How To Make It Rain!You Can Smell The Coffee And Nicotine On His BreathCan Sisko Carry The Singing? Turns Out, He Can!
DS9 107

The six fingers of the Andoran Kolos.

*Picard's Risa booty call shows up on DS9 with a Delta Quadrant lava lamp, no fear of Ferengi ear wax, and a bad case of Q. Q's just as lovable but the DS9 crew ain't down to party as was the Entrepreneur crew. Vash's lamp turns out to be less brine shrimp and more real-life sea monkey!*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Six-fingered-bidder during auction**

For being the "hastily-puddied on" sixth finger during the auction scene
Ben's pick is **Extra behind Vash**

At 28:26, as Vash leaves, being unable to contain his excitement to be on Star Trek
## Trading Cards

That Lunch Room Seems Too SmallObviously The MacGuffinEar DiddlingDefinitely The Jealous BoyfriendWhat Would Picard Not Do?Act Old!Fun VarietyIt Was A Space Flounder The Whole Time
DS9 714

Laas in the form of fire.

*Odo meets another Gold who was also a changebaby. He convinces Laas to crash at DS9 for some chill hangs but when they get to linking it starts kinking Odo and Kira's relationship. This bucket ain't built for three!*

*When Laas lands in the brig for shish-kling-bobbing a warrior's extra Odo accuses Sisko of bucket profiling. Kira sets Laas free & gives Odo his hall pass. Seeing his mistake Odo dumps Laas & returns to give Kira a going golden shower!*

## Show Bits

* Conferences are Dangerous
* Tin MAN
* Episode Over-Cut to theme
* RSVP
* The Scene Does Not Go Well Enterprise
* Star Trek Caves
* Jazz Horse

## P1 Messages

Promotional Message: Drunk

From Boston

## Drunk Shimoda

Daily Double! **Kira**

for getting off to Odo as Aurora Borealis
## Trading Cards

It Looks Like "Tentacle Man!"Hertler Finally Got A Two-Eyed CharacterSo, Odo...Do We Fuck?Lemme Smell You ArmThanks For Inviting Us To A Hang At A Bar Where We Can't Consuem AnythingThis Looks Like The Funnest Day On SetLaas Does Some Of The Best T2 Effects We've Ever Seen!Her Direction Was, "Watch The Sex Candle Episode And Don't Do That!"
DS9 724

*A new ship docks in the Little D spot and it feels great! Quark's Nagus-in-law wants to hand over the family corruption to him. Damar's rebellion turns as dark and hopeless as the basement he's currently living in.*

*While Damar gets the spoons stirred up on Cardassia Prime, Bashir and Ezri commence docking procedures in the elevator. As a new leader is born in Rom, for some reason Jake is getting a new sibling!*

## Show Bits

* Star Trek Caves
* The Little D
* Admiral Belt Buckle
* Girders
* RSVP
* Season 1 Bashir

## P1 Messages

From superfan

From not nubbins

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Quark**

For always being wrong
Ben's pick is **Seskal**

For his 110% death scene
## Trading Cards

If The Lights Were Out You Couldn't Tell The DifferenceZek Facetimes Like A Parent Who Walks Away From The Wifi HotspotCombs Goes Double Loaf Duty!Hard To Know Who's Got It WorseDamar Goes Full William WallaceHow Bad Do You Think Worf Wishes He Could Open An Airlock?It's For Rom????It Turns Out Responding "Are You Sure" To "I'm Pregnant" Is Wrong 100 Times Out Of 100
Head canon

Head canon - *noun*

(1) A viable explanation that allows one to wrap one's head around a high-minded concept in an episode. (2) An explanation which, while not referenced in the actual text of a science fiction work, explains otherwise mysterious or seemingly implausible elements that appear within that work.
"Jake"ing Shuttlecraft

Stemming from the Next Gen episode "Coming of Age", this term refers to the character Jake Kurland, who was a teenaged friend of Wesley's (The Boy?) aboard the Entrepreneur. After failing to gain entrance to the Starfleet Finals exam, Jake freaks out and rashly absconds away in a Previa, only to soon panic and have to embarrassingly rely on Picard's guidance to get the shuttle back safely.

Ben and Adam have since immortalized Jake's actions into a full on podcast term, referring to any instance of spacecraft thievery or other such behaviors as "Jake-ing".

Note: The correct term for what **Jake** Sisko does in his father's ancient Bajorian solar sail ship is Crankin' It
DS9 410

Poster by J.J. LendL

Conferences are Dangerous

*A Pinto class runabout explosion causes Sisko, Dax, Kira, Worf and O'Brien to get Troned into the holosuite as characters in Bashir's program Lazenby 1. It's sexpionage and Bill Clinton levels of cigar action all the way down.*

*To keep the others from getting degaussed, Bashir has to keep the game running until Rom can shove a paper clip into the holosuite. It gets to the Dalton era before the doctor knows what to do. The only winning move is not to play.*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Anastasia Komananov**

Pulling a folder from under the bed backwards without looking
Ben's pick is **Guy who gets knocked out by a cork**

For being 99.95% of the way to being knocked out
## Trading Cards

Its Gonna Be A Wet Tuxedo Before Too LongComing Back From A ConferenceThis Is An Oral Presentation SituationEverybody Smokes A StogieI Don't Think Bond Films Looked This CrappyChooses "Easy Mode"Oh, She's Palming The KeyA Little Disappointed When It Happens
DS9 615

Dataport implant

*Taking on the alias "Johnny Utah," Miles is sent to infiltrate a group of criminals called the Ex-Federation Presidents lead by Bodhi...sorry, Bilby. But when Miles bonds with Bilby it makes turning him in no piece of cake.*

*Miles cracks the case and the Klingons are ready to Rouge One Bilby and crew. Bilby takes the news Charlie Frost style and walks away from the emotional explosion leaving Miles with a fluffy allergen problem.*

## Show Bits

* Worf Lightning
* Episode Over-Cut to theme
* K urn
* Ball Kicking Machine

## P1 Messages

Happy Aniversary

Happy Birthday

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Chadwick**

What are you even doing Chadwick?
Ben's pick is **Chester the cat**

For not liking people sitting in his chair
## Trading Cards

Do You Like My Wife's Cake Or Would You Rather Have Her "Pie?"Having Mouth Loaf Is Rough Enough. Then He Gets Killed!He Tried To Take Over The Little D Last Episode! Is O'Brien Made?Has Anyone Looked More "Starfleet" Than Chadwick?He Puts His "Crowbar" Right In The Bank Door "Seam"He Likes To Watch. So Does The CatYou Get The Sense This Happens All The Time In This BarHow Good Are The Hepa Filters On DS9?
DS9 313

Poster by J.J. LendL

50 Year Old Ensign

*Proving again it's the most dangerous way to travel, a shuttle accident blasts Bareil. To save him, Bashir must use a positronic version of the Hfuhruhurr Cranial Screw-Top Method of brain surgery. Someone get that cat out of here!*

*Winn goes full Delores Benedict pushing Bareil to keep injecting himself with window cleaner so she can inherit his Cardassian peace dowry! Meanwhile, Jake and Nog go on a date ripped from an old "Three's Company" script.*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **60 year old Ferengi waiter**

For being as old as the Nagus but still working in a bar
Ben's pick is **Nog**

For the way he annouces that "Money is good but women are bett-er"
## Trading Cards

I Had Labs Taken. The Results Are In!The Scene You Usually Get In A Hospital ShowTechno YamakaThe Cross Cut Gives You The Emotional Bends!The Only One Wearing A Carmen Miranda BlouseI've Had Weird Things Put Inside My Body BeforeIt Should Have The Pope Hat Of Kai WinnThe Grief Chickens Have Come Home To Roost
Doc Holoday

It's the holographic doctor. The EMH. Version 1.0 of Doctor Zimmerman's attempt at holo-infamy.
On the show he's called Doctor. Or The Doctor. There was a (very) brief storyline where he was gonna choose a name but that died a swift and merciful death.
Ben and Adam needed a way to refer to him, and they settled on Doc Holoday because he's a hologram, and also because Doc Holliday was a real person. And not a very savory person.
DIS 210

Poster by J.J. LendL

*With Airiam bulk erased and space coffined (are there just 1000s of these floating around?) the Discovery crew is back on Operation Black Flag. They've got to build a trap where The Red Angel can check in but can't check out!*

*Admiral Bob goes Newhart to Culber's Elliot Carlin. Leland gets Event Horizoned and the replicators don't know how to make Visine The only way to catch The Red Angel is for Burnham to do a Bangkok checkout!*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Pike**

For displaying breath-play videos in the workplace
Ben's pick is **Culber**

For acting like a lost child
## Trading Cards

Airiam Did Have Augmented BreastsDo You Think They Are Close Enough To The Mutara Nebula?Really Leaning Into The S&M AestheticShe's Saying She Can Turn HimBobs' Therapy Lamp Is OnThey're Some Nasty Little KinkstersWhy, Discovery? WHY?!?!Better Than The Slot In Your Underpants