Moomin

**Moomins**, *(Latin: **Somnum Exterreri**)* are a subspecies of monster which are found primarily in the northernmost points of Europe, North western Russia, and nightmares.

They are known and feared across the world, particularly in Scandinavia where they are the 3rd most common cause of death in the region[*citation needed*].

## Physical characteristics

Moomins resemble large pale anthropomorphic hippos and typically stand anywhere from 6.5 to 8 foot tall. Their thick leathery hide ranges in colour from bright whites to dim greys and desaturated blues.

### Biology

Moomins are resistant to a number of attacks that would normally kill or seriously injure most other species. Their thick skin protects them against most projectiles and their large piercing eyes can see in almost total darkness.

Despite their size, Moomins have been known to reach up to 50 mph while chasing prey and can leap up to 20 feet in the air. Their tail is mostly decorative.

### Abilities

Moomins are capable of entering dreams and causing excessive fear to their victims, often resulting in nocturnal cardiac arrest. They can also emit strong paralytic waves from their eyes, paralysing those they stare at.

### Diet

Moomin's live off of a diet consisting mainly of meat, hair, and whatever the person is wearing at the time. Their mouth is not usually visible but can be unhinge and extend to twice the size of a moomin's head in order to swallow prey whole. Juvenile moomins, or *moomlettes,* cannot open their mouth very wide and so their food is usually sat on by their parents and liquefied so that they can simply drink it like a soup.

## Behaviour

Moomins are mainly active in the night though have been known to attack during the day. They rarely peacefully interact with other species unless deemed absolutely necessary for survival.

### Communication

While examining their behaviour in nature is difficult, some Moomins have been observed communicating with one another through vocalisations similar to human language. Anthropologists have made many attempts to translate this dialect, known as *Finnish*, to figure out what Moomins are saying to each other but little progress has been made.

### Hunting

Moomins are known to be ambush hunters, luring their prey into dark forested areas before paralysing them with their stare and swallowing them whole. Though they have also been known in the past to attack human settlements, it is not understood if this is simply for food, or some other unknown reason.

If you ever find yourself being hunted by a moomin, local governments recommend prayer as a method of survival as well as ***NOT GOING ANYWHERE NEAR THE BIG BULBOUS BASTARDS.***

## Homeland

> Main article: Finland
>
>

Not much is known of the Moomin homeland, only that is it indeed a real place and that it is generally considered ~~unpleasant~~ hellish by those who have survived it.
Explorer Hans Bracken, who once visited the area, described it as *"A perpetual hellscape"*. He detailed his adventures in his award winning book *"Yes I went there"*.

> *"The Moomins come from a realm of vaguery, with danger and terror tucked into folds, ready to spring out on unwary travelers. Nothing is solid, certain or clear; there are no discernible landmarks, everything drains, crumbles and bleeds into each other and a darkness of torment flows between the bleedings. The fabric of reality itself is the waters in which these twisted sharks swim." **- Yes I went there.***
>
>

## In Culture

Throughout history Moomins have had a huge impact on cultures in northern Europe. Many countries in the region only exist because of alliances made in fear of Moomin attacks. The Moomin can bee seen in almost all aspects of life in the north from art, clothing, and architecture.

### Art

Depictions of Moomins go back as far as a stone age with cave paintings showing the daily struggle to not be eaten during the likely frequent moomin attacks.

### The moomin's impact today

Today the moomin is still a very real danger to those living in Scandinavia and parts of Russia. Every year local villagers are urged to sacrifice small animals such as goats, mules, and children in order to appease the moomins. However some say that these offerings do little to prevent attacks.

## Notable Moomins

*None.*

*All of them*

***Just run***