Irresolutely

*Irresolutely*
By DiamondKittyHero

**◇⋄ Prologue ⋄◇**

Ivyfeather purred as she looked at her three kits romping around in the snow, as if they were kits again. But nine moons had passed, and they had grown and become apprentices of the Clan two moons ago. Although Ashpaw, her eldest kit, seemed unpleased with the temperature, Ivyfeather herself was unperturbed by the bitter sting of the cold that had seeped into every object. The mother had been born at the very beginning of leaf-bare, and experienced it for the first three moons of her life. It reminded her of kit-hood, and - coincidentally - warmth, and milk.

"I won’t even ask how you can sit out here, since my mind still won't fully be able to comprehend it." A white-chested dark brown tabby tom sat next to the pale gray-and-white she-cat. Ivyfeather's amber stare was turned to her mate's green, and she smiled.

"You may have the longer fur, but it's thinner. Doesn't hold in heat as well." She shrugged, nonchalant, while Eagleheart rolled his bold green optics.

"I didn't ask you to say give *any* reason, you know, so saying another, more reasonable one doesn't really help."

"Sure it doesn't."

They sat in quietude, both cats' watchful stares turned to the apprentices. Ashpaw, despite having inherited her father's thin but long coat (although inheriting her mother's pale gray coloration), was still enjoying herself. Frostpaw's thick-furred, snowy white pelt not only helped her blend in with her surroundings, but allowed her to stay in it, making her a very potential hunter during this time of the year. Kestrelpaw's light brown coat was also short like her mother's, but not as thick, leaving her in a bad situation when rolling in the cold substance.

But all the sisters had smiles on their faces and laughs on their tongues. They had a medicine cat who was perfectly capable of taking care of them, and comfy nests to lay in, with warm Clanmates whom with they could snuggle with. They seemed to be aware of this, for Kestrelpaw didn't care about the snow sticking to her pelt, and Ashpaw didn't mind being pushed into a snow pile. Frostpaw seemed to be having fun, although the lucky kitty was the one best suited for leaf-bare.

"I remember being like that," Eagleheart murmured. "During warmer seasons, anyway."

"How times have changed," Ivyfeather noted with a quiet chuckle. Eagleheart nodded.

"I'm not stealing your moss in hopes you’ll share a nest with me," he meowed. Ivyfeather laughed.

"Furball."

"Mouse-brain."

Tails entwining affectionately, they headed inside the warriors den. Meanwhile, Lilypaw was standing next to her brother, Rabbitpaw, as he took in the surrounding camp. The pale gray she-cat sighed as she watched the three play, blue eyes focused on the apprentices.

"It's a very pretty day today, isn't it?" Rabbitpaw commented. She nodded.

"Yes," she replied quietly. "Yes it is."

**◇⋄ Chapter One ⋄◇**

*Give or Take*

Cats came in all different sizes and colors, and varying shapes of the same type of body. Some felines took their chances on their own; some took help from Twolegs. Others were a mix of in-between, not fully dependent on the strange-colored creatures but not fully relying on skills, either.

Then, you had the Clan cats, the ones who lived in the wild but didn't fight out problems (as much). In a Clan, someone always would have another Clanmate's back, no matter any tension between them. It was an interesting way of living, when it came to feral cats, but it was the only type of life Kestrelpaw had only known.

Although she wouldn't admit it, Kestrelpaw sometimes toyed with the idea of becoming a kittypet. LeopardClan, her Clan, wasn't fond of them, not really willing to take in any, unlike TigerClan. There was an intense, vibrant hatred that poured out of LionClan cats at Gatherings, directed at the kittypet-takers. LeopardClan had always been neutral, though, not wanting to get caught up in the drama. It led to insults being spat at them, but if there was no necessary battle to be fought, then why join in?

*Kittypets wouldn't be stuck in this scenario,* Kestrelpaw told herself. There had been plans, during times, to "accidentally" get lost during a patrol, and wander on close to Twolegs. But she would be eating before the patrol, reviewing the plans in her head, when she would suddenly recall that being a kittypet, while meaning comfort, would mean she wouldn't get to feel the satisfactory sense as she killed a mouse, or get to stretch her legs by bounding around the forest. As such, she would do the patrol like normal, this thought at the front of her mind. But it always faded into the background as things came up - a sick Clanmate, a battle...and the cycle repeated.

Kestrelpaw sighed to herself. *No more running away,* she told herself firmly. She usually did, and inwardly she knew that eventually the cycle would repeat itself once more. Still, she repeated the thought to herself, until it became a mix of odd sounds in her head.

The light brown she-cat sighed, stretching out in her nest. Bored, she examined her white forepaw. Upon hearing the muffled cry from Frostpaw (likely muffled because her face was pushed into her moss nest), though, she sat back up, looking over at her sister. The pure white she-cat's back faced her, so she carefully crept around Ashpaw and lay down next to Frostpaw. The she-cat took up the nest, so she lay on the ground, blinking gently at the she-cat named for cold.

"It's okay," she murmured. "I'm here." Frostpaw blinked open her green eyes at Kestrelpaw, and she seemed to realize that whatever had caused her to whimper was a dream, so she nodded. Frostpaw was haunted by nightmares seemingly every night, and didn't like to be alone. Kestrelpaw smiled gently, before watching Frostpaw close her eyes. It was only when the white she-cat's breathing slowed that Kestrelpaw allowed herself to close her eyes and slither into unconsciousness.

𐩒⭗◯⭗𐩒
Lilypaw was an early riser, and she always had been. Sleeping in past dawn was late for her, really. This sleeping habit clashed with her mentor's, who had to be the laziest cat in the Clan. Pebblesky was the leader's mate, and she acted as if it automatically made her the ruler. StarClan, she was *annoying!* Truth be told, her mentor didn't even really mentor her - she just ordered others to do it. More often than not, she wound up with Rosewhisker, a patient ginger-and-white she-cat who mentored Kestrelpaw as well.

Lilypaw was close to the entrance - or exit, depending on which side you were on - to the den, so she stepped out, allowing the chill of the new day to soak into her soft pelt. She didn't exactly *like* leaf-bare, but it was the best time when you wanted to be awake in the morning. Sure, leaf-fall could be chilly too, but not enough at times, new-leaf was exactly the right temperature, which might cause one to fall right back asleep, and after trying to cool down the entire night, green-leaf could be way too hot and could turn someone back into the nice shadows of the den.

She shook off her paws with a shiver after letting them get cold, waking herself up more. She then looked around for Rosewhisker, but no one else was up except the deputy. She approached Foxflight, the snow crunching beneath her paws alerting him and causing the orange tom to turn his distracted yellow eyes to her. "Lilypaw," he muttered. "What are you doing, being up this early in *leaf-bare?* Do you ever sleep in?"

She hummed, going through her memories. She had, a couple times, but only when she was a new apprentice and when she was a kit. "Not really," she meowed with a shrug. The ginger tom frowned, pale-tipped tail gently waving back and forth in thought.

"You should. It's cold."

"The Clan needs to be fed," she argued, light blue eyes narrowing at the deputy. The tom flicked a black ear in annoyance.

"All the prey will be sleeping."

She sighed.

***This chapter is a WIP!***

*This story is a work-in-progress.*