Beat City

The greatest game of all time

Beat City, released April 20th 2010, depsite it's weed funnie release date, is NO joke. This is the greatest game of all time, and an absolute masterpiece of the rhythm game genre. If you do not like beat city, the earth does not like you and you will be smited within the next hour. This game is better then you are, so only a genius connoisseur such as myself should do the article.

## Gameplay

The gameplay has you use the touchscreen to preform various actions to the beat. Some simple actions you simply tap, other more complex actions require the player to swipe the screen. It is incredibly responsive and 100% accurate, never failing, unlike that the super terrible imprecise controls of that other DS game, Rhythm Heaven. THQ are actual gods and if you shit on this gameplay you will die.

## Plot

"Once upon a time Beat City was a prosperous place with a vibrant mood, happy and friendly residents and a uniquely creative atmosphere. Since then it has been taken over by the evil Cacophony Corporation, over by failed opera singer Dame Isolde Minor. She is draining the spirit of the people and turning them into mindless drones for the Cacophony factories.

Beat City residents have yet to find out that a hero is on the way! A Groovy Whale armed with the power of the beat has descended upon Beat City from a far-away planet in order to find a worthy citizen of exploting Beat City, Groovy Whale comes ascross a citizen who contains a uniquelly strong sense of beat and rhythm, which has been supressed by the evil Cacophony. By imbedding a speaker in the head of this once vibrant citizen, Groovy Whale has revived the beat within the chosen hero known as Synchronizer. Use the power of the beat to prove that rhythm is life and see Beat City revitaliozed in front of your eyes!" Nah I'm only kidding. What actually happens is Bob the builder and Horrid Henry, the 2 gods of the stupidverse, take a dump on Gadget's torture couch as he's reviewing Mike Matei's dead body. Then, Gadget gets revenge on Beat The Meat City, a land of European people who play Super Mario Bros 2 while drinking Knack 2's disc in liquid form, by turning their games into lettuce, ruining all their games. You play as Papa Smurf, and have to harness the powers of Bubberducky to stop the evil Inspector Gadget from ruining nerds lives.

## Characters

Papa Smurf-The main hero of this epic quest. He goes through many trials, starting as kind and caring but becoming more grumpy and only caring about killing gadget by the end, after the major plot twist of chapter 4 where Papa Smurf realizes true sadness when Toadette dies, signifying his loss of innocence, which leads him to grow isolated.
Toadette-A child like character Papa Smurf cares until chapter 4 when she dies at the hands of Zombie Mike. This moment signifies the loss of innocence, as everything in the story from this point on is much sadder, and the game has a much darker tone, truly justifying it's AO rating
Gadget-The main villain of the story, a man who just wants the world to become 100% void of nerds, and hates video games that aren't his own or minecraft. He has been shown murdering hardcore gamers with his magic finger laser.
Horrid Henry-The semi final/third to last boss depending on the order the player picks in chapter 6. He simply rules the world with his epicness, but Bob the builder and him share and fight over it.
Bob the builder-The semi final/third to last boss depending on the order the player picks in chapter 6. He simply rules the world with his epicness, but Horrid Henry and him share and fight over it.

Minimen-3 hooligans who stop you at random points in the story

## Chapters

Chapter 1-The worst day in nerd history. Gadget simply attacks the town, and the chapter has you looking through destroyed houses to find and remaining nerds to form a rebellion, in which you find Toadette and Crash(From Crash and Berenstein, not the Bandicoot). You then do a boss fight with Gadget that you lose no matter what.

Chapter 2-Meme Mining. You search through a mine to find 200 gems, with a bunch of pissed off Creepers invading, when you're done you rematch gadget and lose.

Chapter 3-Zombie attack. Mike Matei's zombie comes to life and chases you, and murders Crash. You and Toadette fight Gadget and lose.

Chapter 4-Super Frown. Mike comes back and kills Toadette, which makes Papa Smurf so angry he kills Mike Matei, and actually does 10000 damage to Gadget in the end chapter boss, but still loses.

Chapter 5-Insane Solitude. Papa Smurf murders everyone in his path til he finds Gadget, and actually beats him, but gadget reveals he only broke one of his processor chips, and a new one is downloading this second, which will make him even stronger. It then does and Gadget is protected by a msteryious shield that summons the 2 gods.

Chapter 6-Ungodly end. First you fight either Bob The Builder or Henry, then the one you didn't. Then you do the 20 hour final boss against gadget. After you do 50000000000 damage, which takes roughly 15 hours, he reveals he turned Toadette's dead body into a base for a robot, and robo Toadette attacks. Papa Smurf ends up having to kill Robo Toadette, which makes Gadget give up... then he reveals he had the infinity gauntlet the whole time, default dances, and then thanos snaps and the cartridge explodes, forcing you to buy the game again if you want to replay it.

## Reception

Beat City was widely regarded as the greatest game of all time by critics. IGN gave it a 8.7/10, saying it had an immersive story, awesome rhytmic gameplay, but too many boss fights in comparison to the 0 regular battles. Gamespot gave it a 9/10, saying it made Rhythm Heaven look like poop. Gamexplain gave it a Mindblowing, saying if Papa Smurf isn't smash dlc they will film themselves punching Reggy. It currently sits with a 110 on Metacritic.