Chapter 001: And It Begins

Willis Cromwell and Jacob Prescott stood outside the old abandoned mansion.
"Why exactly are we here again?" Jacob asked.

"Looking for treasure!" Willis shouted excitedly.

"Treasure?" Jacob asked.  "There is no treasure.  This house has been abandoned for years."

"Not entirely true." Willis said.  "The witch lives here."

"A witch?" Jacob asked.

Willis nodded his head.  "Yeah.  You know.  Sybil Shadowsong.  We learned about her in history class back in high school."

"Sybil Shadowsong is just an old legend.  That was 200 years ago.  She's probably dead by now.  And even if she was here, why would you want to piss off a witch?  "

They were the best of friends Jacob, calm and level headed, was the "leader".  Willis had a loud and erratic personality that contrasted with Jacob's peaceful nature.  He often came up with harebrained ideas, and it was up to Jacob to bring him back down to earth.The two young men entered the house.

"You're lucky I'm here Willis."  Jacob said.  "Somebody has to keep you from going off the deep end.  Now let's hurry up.  Get what you came here for, and let's go. We have a game later today.  We should be focusing on that, not engaging in BS like this."

"Don't worry.  I've got it in the bag" Willis said.

Look at this.

They both walked into the room.

"And I assure you Jake, that I am very much alive."

"First, it's Jacob.  Not Jake.  Jacob.  Like the douche from the vampire movies."  He said coldly

"Yeah.  Don't call him Jake.  That's his trigger." Willis affirmed him.

"I'll take my chances."  The witch replied.  "It's not like Jake here can do anything to harm me."

Jacob's eyes widened at hearing the dimunitive nickname.  He then stared daggers through the witch, intent on making her pay for her transgression.  As Jacob charged at the witch, Sybil waved her magic wand, causing a banana peel to appear on Jacob's path.  The young man slipped on the banana peel, but then executed a perfect backflip and landed on his feet.

"That was a close one." Jacob said in relief.  Suddenly, he felt something smack him in the face and he flew backwards.  Jacob regained his composure and looked up to see a muscular man wearing an armored breastplate and two gauntlets standing over him.  He was holding a weapon that looked like a metal paddle with a sword's hilt and serrated edges.  Jacob realized he had been pimp slapped in the face by said weapon.

"If you know what's good for you, you'll leave right now." the armored man said.

Jacob sighed, knowing he was outmatched against these magical beings.  "Fine."  Jacob got up and approached Willis, who was hunched timidly against a wall.  "Let's go."  As the two young men walked towards the front door, Jacob turned to ask his friend a question, "Why didn't you have my back?  And why do you stink?"

Willis hung his head down in shame.  "Because I shit my pants.  And because I shit my pants."

Schuyler O'Maher paced around his home laboratory.  At 21 years old, Schuyler was a prodigy and a genius inventor and tinkerer.  He built his car, his home, and all of the electrical and electronic components within it all with his own two hands.  And as the youngest son of business magnate Theo O'Maher, he had more money to fund his projects than he could ever dream of.  “Everything is coming together quite nicely."

Schuyler's assistant Alfie nodded.  Alfie was Skipper's best friend since middle school.  A no-nonsense young man from a middle class family, Alfie felt it was his personal responsibility to keep the silver spoon fed genius grounded.  “The Nano project is indeed your best work.  But who are you going to get to test it?  The results with the last subject were...less than desirable."

“Subject Waldo adapted to the Nanomachines perfectly.” Schuyler protested

Alfie replied, “Subject Waldo also possessed....unfavorable qualities.  Also he hates you.  The next subjects need to be devoid of those.  And he needs to not hate your guts.”

"Well.  I do know of one excellent subject...." Schuyler began to suggest.

"Not doing it." Alfie objected.

Schuyler shrugged, "But I've already given you the equipment."

“And I'm keeping it in storage." Alfie said.

Skipper sighed.  "Oh well.  I can always find some kids to test the Nano project"

"Kids?” Alfie inquired.  “As in children?  You are aware that child labor is illegal.  At least get permission from the parents before you exploit them”

Schuyler corrected him, “No I mean like college aged kids.  They will do anything you ask them to if it gets them money, or cool points.  They will get lots of cool points by taking part in the Nano Project.  But where can we find such people”

“Well,” Alfie suggested.  “There are quite a few young adults working for your father's company.”

“Good idea, Alfie.  You're a genius.  Subject Waldo also worked for Dad's company.  So, chances are, we can also find a few who possess the same attributes as him.”

“The same positive attributes, and NONE of the negative ones.” Alfie clarified.

"One would say that Subject Waldo's negative qualities WERE his positive qualities"  Schuylershrugged.  "Oh well.  Let's go Alfie.  We need to test drives the new Hovercraft."

Schuyler drove around in the Hovercraft.  Alfie sat in the passenger seat next to him.

After a minute, or so Skipper realized that the vehicle in front of him had stopped, preventing him from moving any further.  Strangely enough, it was a horse drawn carriage being pulled by a demonic horse.  However, Skipper was unfazed by its menacing appearance and more concerned with the fact that the vehicle refused to advance forward even though the light had changed green.

"What the fuck is this asshole doing?"  He sighed in exasperation.  Skipper pressed a button on the Hovercraft's dashboard.

The door of the carriage opened and a figure stepped out of it.  The person riding in the carriage was none other than Sybil

"INSOLENT MORTAL!" Sybil cackled out.  "Did you just honk at me."

"Do bears shit in the woods.  Damn right I just honked at you" Skipper shouted

"You dare speak to Sybil Shadowsong with such impudence?!" the witch replied

"Why shouldn't I?" Schuylerasked boldly

"Because you should fear me!" said Sybil.  "I'm a witch!  You never seen the Wizard of Oz?"  Sybil

"Oh I watched the Wizard of Oz all right." Schuyleranswered.  "And you'd best back up before I dump some water on your bitch ass."

"Such insolence from a mortal!  Tremble in fear of my dark magic!"  Sybil's hands glowed green and she let out another cackle.

"SHE HAS MAGICAL POWERS!  WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU ANTAGONIZING HER?!  SHE CAN TURN US INTO NEWTS IF SHE WANTED"  Alfie cried out.

Schuyler was unfazed.  “You see...Sybil.  I would ahem, tremble...except there’s one problem.”

“And that would be?” asked the witch.

“Magic ain’t got shit on science, bitch!”  Schuyler snappily replied, he pressed.  The trunk of the hovercraft opened up, and a drone flew out of it. The drone revealed a machine gun, and then opened fire.

Sybil countered by waving her wand, causing a forcefield to appear in front of her, blocking all of the bullets.

“Ahahahahaha” the witch cackled.  “Your toys don’t frighten me, boy.  As you mortals like to say, you’d better check yourself before you wreck yourself.”  The witch raised her magic wand, as if preparing to strike Schuyler’s vehicle with it.

“Excuse yourself?  I built this hovercraft with my own two hands, and I know you aren’t about to touch this hovercraft with your ratchet ass fairy wand.” Schuyler said.

"What did you just say?“

“Did I stutter?” Schuyler shouted boldly.  “I know...you aren’t....about to touch...this hovercraft...with your ratchet ass fairy wand.  YOU are the one who should check yourself.”  He pulled out a laser gun, and pointed it at the witch  The gun slowly began to hum and whir.

Sybil smirked, “Another one of your silly little toys?”

Suddenly the gun spoke in an automated voice, “Choch Quotient is 452.  Entering Scourge Eradication Mode.  Aim carefully and eliminate the fucking choch with extreme prejudice.”

Schuyler let off a shot, firing a small pellet of blue energy.  Out of nowhere a small humanoid creature jumped in front of Sybil, taking the shot for the witch.  The small burst of energy struck the imp, causing it to burst into blue flames until the creature was reduced to ashes.

Schuyler then spoke “This device I hold in my hand scans and measures your unpleasantness and converts it into destructive power.  I call it the Chochinator, because I generally use it to eliminate choches whenever they annoy me.  It measures your probability of unpleasant fuckery and converts that probability into a number I call the Choch Quotient.   If you’re a really really huge choch, this baby will blow you off the face-of the Earth.”

Another creature similar to first emerged from the carriage.  This one was taller, looking more like a handsome, albeit short statured young adult with pointy ears.

"JAMES!" the small man shouted.  "You killed James!"

"What the fuck are you?" Schuyler asked.

"What does it look like asshole?  I'm a haffling" the dimunitive man replied.

"The fuck's a haffling?" Schuyler asked.  "Is that like an elf, a dwarf, or something."

"No, you fucking normie.  I'm not a dwarf.  Dwarves have big heads and stumpy limbs.  I'm a haffling.  Our body proportions are the same as normal people, but we're half the size of you normies."

"That smoldering pile of ash that was your friend was like 3 feet tall.  You're like 4'11.  For all I know, you're just a 'normie' like me and my friend, except you're just pretending to be a magical creature just to make yourself look significant" Schuyler said.

"Yes, I am 4'11.  By haffling standards, I'm a giant!" he replied, smirking.

Schuyler shook his head and simply aimed the weapon at him.  "Correction.  Was."

*“Choch quotient is 527.  Entering Scourge Eradication Mode.  Aim carefully and eliminate the fucking choch with extreme prejudice.”*The Chochinator’s automated voice rang out as it scanned

"Before I send you to whatever your version of heaven or hell is.  Tell me your name."  Schuyler said.

"My name is Englewood Bentley.  My friends call me 'The Anthill'.  Please don't kill me.  I'm not a bad person.  I only do this because Sybil promised to pay my way through college."

"Wow.  Just wow." Schuyler said.  "Exploiting the youth for personal gain.  You really are a witch."

Alfie raised his finger, "We were just considering" Schuyler cut him off by elbowing him in the gut.

"Look.  Anthill.  Whatever she's paying you, I can double it.  "

"Deal, "The Anthill said, and then disappeared in a puff of smoke.

"Anthill is quitting on me?!  You'll pay for that!" Sybil shrieked.  She then waved and fired a blast of energy at a nearby cement mixer.  The cement oozed out onto the street, and pooled next to the witch until it formed itself into a large humanoid shape.  A golem made of cement.  “What now?” Sybil cackled.  “I bet your “Choch gun” doesn’t work on constructs, does it.”

The Cement Golem slowly approached Schuyler.  It raised its fist and smashed it into the hood of Schuyler's hovercraft, denting it.  Meanwhile Sybil charged up another blast from her wand, and shot it at the windshield, shattering it.  She fired a second blast at the golem, shattering it into pieces, and then levitated those pieces into the air, and rained them down onto Schuyler’s hovercraft.  The vehicle was left completely totaled.

Sybil then let out another victorious cackle before disappearing in a puff of smoke.

Schuyler and Alfie stared at his destroyed vehicle, and then pulled out his cellphone.  Schuyler sighed.  "I guess I need to call a tow truck"

Off in the distance, another figure had recorded the entire exchange on his smartphone.  Wesley "Wes" Saeed chuckled to himself as he observed Schuyler and Sybil's road rage incident.

"Wes! What the fuck are you doing?" Wes' friend, Mitchell St. John asked.

"Schuyler O'Maher just had a road rage incident with that witch who lives in the hills.  I got it all on video."  Wes laughed

"Forget about them.  We need to go.  We have a game."  Mitchell reminded him.  Mitchell and Wes were also Duelball players, and today they happened to be competing against Jacob Prescott and Willis Cromwell of all people in a game of 2 on 2.

At the Port Evergreen Duelball Arenas, people filed into their seats to watch another set of Duelball matches.  Duelball is the city of Port Evergreen's favorite past time.  It was a brutal, violent game combining aspects o combat sports with ball games.  Two competitors stand on a 30X30 court.  A goal is placed on two corners of the court.  The object of the game was to get the ball into the goal.  The first person to score a goal wins the game.  Players, called Duelists, were legally allowed to use any physical means (with the exception of low blows and eye gouging) to obtain possession of the ball or to prevent the other Duelist from scoring.  Players from all walks of life and all backgrounds came to Port Evergreen to play this game.  It was a large part of the city's culture.  It was a source of entertainment for locals.  Tourists came to Port Evergreen to watch Duelball games.  It provided jobs for the citizens.  And additionally, two Duelists could use the court to settle personal and even legal disputes.  The game of Duelball was invented by Theo O'Maher, business tycoon and Schuyler's father.

Jacob and Willis made their way out to the court.  Jacob sported a bruise on his forehead from the altercation with Sybil and her armored bodyguard earlier.  Both of them wore mostly matching outfits.  They had on polo shirts, with three circles on the front.  Willis' shirt was blue while Jacob's was black.  And while Jacob wore crew socks and basketball shoes, Willis was barefoot, with his feet wrapped in athletic tape.

"Are you sure you still wanna go through with this?" Willis asked.  "I mean, you took a huge blow to the head."  Willis eyed Jacob's bruise.  "You might've gotten a concussion.  If you want I can talk to the ref and see if we can have the game post-poned.  Or I can just ask to play one of our opponents one on one."

"No.  I'm fine." Jacob said.  "Tis a flesh wound."

Jacob and Willis' opponents were then introduced.  And they just happened to be Mitchell St. John and Wes Saeed.

The referee placed the ball on the ground in the center of the court.  Jacob and Mitchell approached the ball from either side and got into a three point stance.   Willis and Wes each stood on the right side of their respective partners, positioning their bodies to face inward towards the ball

"Ready....Set....DUEL!" The ref commanded, and then blew his whistle.

Mitchell quickly grabbed the ball and held it close to his body with both arms.  Jacob was only 5'8, while Mitchell was 6'4 with long arms and long legs.  Mitchell was built like a basketball player.  Jacob attempted to move inward, but Mitchell was quick to respond by giving him a quick chop to the abdomen, knocking the wind out of him.  He then slammed the ball to the ground, bouncing it up, and making it hit Jacob directly in his the spot where his bruise was.  He recovred the ball and passed it to his partner.

Before Wes could move, Willis cartwheeled into his path.  Willis was not as tall as Mitchell, but at an even 6', he still towered over the 5'5 Middle Easterner.  Wes attempted to stave off his attacker with a high kick but Willis dodged it with a back handspring before charging again.  Wes leapt up, lifted his legs and planted both feet in Willis' chest while simultaneously chest passing the ball into his face.

The ball rolled over to Mitchell, who attempted a jump shot into the goal.  Jacob was on him fast, grabbing him by the waist from behind in midair and planting him with a German Suplex on the unforgiving hardwood floor.  "Owwww," Mitchell moaned painfully.

Jacob attempted to recover the ball but Wes got to it first.  Wes tucked the ball into his body like a football, and ran forward, hoping to plow Jacob over with a shoulder tackle, but Jacob dropped to the ground and kicked him in the leg  The ball was now in Willis' possession

Willis made a beeline for the goal.  Mitchell, having gotten back to his feet was quick to block his path.  Just ask the two were about to meet, Jacob managed to get between them and bent over down.   Jacob's muscular back provided a platform for Willis to run onto and jump off of, in an attempt to go for a dunk.  Mitchell leapt into the air, raising up both of his long arms hoping to stop the attempt.  Willis' momentum was too great.  He sailed for the goal, but managed to lift his nimble legs up in mid air and wrap them around Mitchell's torso before slamming the ball into the goal, hanging from the rim, with his legs still clutching Mitchell's upper body.  The two young men dangled high over the court.

The referee blew his whistle, awarding the win to Jacob and Willis.

"Good game bro." Mitchell said, acknowledging his opponent.  "But can we come down.  This is a little bit awkward".

"Sorry dude." Willis winced in discomfort.  "I think it's about to get even more awkward."  Willis then ripped a really loud and wet fart.  "Oh fuck.  I think I just shit myself."

Mitchell grimaced  "Oh fuck!  That's sick!  Gross"  he shouted in disgust.  Disgusted by the toxic aroma making its way to his nose, the trapped Mitchell grew increasingly nauseated until he could hold back no more and he lost his lunch all over Willis's shirt.  Startled, Willis let go of the goal and the two young men came crashing to the floor, and crumpled in a heap of their own filth.

Mitchell looked over to see Wes grabbing his phone from one of the courtside audience members, who he had instructed to record the game.  Wes rushed over to show Mitchell the clip of Willis dunking on him and then soiling himself.  "This is so going viral" he chuckled.  Mitchell weakly raised a middle finger to his partner.

"And now" The announcer boomed out, "It is time for Intermission.  For your entertainment, please welcome locally renowned street dancer, Ezra Tate!"

Ezra made his entrance.  He walked past Jacob, who was dragging an incapacitated Willis back to the locker room by the collar of his shirt.

"Good game, play boy." Ezra said, bumping fists with Jacob.  Ezra then sniffed the air.  "Did he shit himself again?"

"You know it," Jacob responded.  "Right after he scored the game winning dunk.  And it was so bad that he made Mitchell puke.  But that's my boy."

Jacob dragged Willis back to the locker room, while Ezra headed out on the court and performed some choreographed hip hop dances to uprooting applause.  The crowd was so enamored that they threw money out on the court.

"Thank you, come again", Kendall Brayne cheerfully said as she handed a plushie version of the Dueling ball to a young couple.  Kendall worked in the gift shop of the Port Evergreen Dueling Arenas, selling memorabilia and souvenirs.  IT was a fun job and she basically got to watch the Duels for free.

"Hey Kendall" shouted Kendall's best friend Tia Chen, the same girl who recorded the Jacob and Willis vs. Wes and Mitchell Duel on Wes' phone.

"Hey.  Just 20 more minutes and I'm almost done.  Just waiting for Kayla to come relieve me.  Did Jacob and Willis win?"

"Oh they won." Tia answered. "And you will not believe what just happened."

"Spill." Kendall demanded

"Okay, Willis dunked on Mitchell, and then pooped himself.  And Mitchell was so grossed out that he threw up."

The two girls laughed.

"It's not funny!" Willis' voice called out

Willis and Jacob, having showered, and changed out of their Duel gear and into casual clothes entered the gift shop.  Jacob was wearing a plain washed out red T-shirt with grey slim-fit jeans and sneakers.  Willis was wearing a blue short-sleeved hooded sweatshirt over a short sleeved checkered button down shirt, the shirt tails hanging out from underneath the hoodie.  He was also wearing denim cutoff shorts and flip flops.

Willis immediately made a beeline for Tia.  "Tia, why would you record my humiliation!?"

Tia simply responded, "Because Wes asked me to record your Duel on his phone."

"But the Duel was over?  Why were you still recording?  I pooped myself AFTER the ref blew the whistle."

"But that dunk though.  And you're welcome for the assist".  Jacob said.

Ezra also entered the gift shop.

"Dude, these people just made it rain out there.  You guys wanna go out and eat?"

The five teens prepared to leave, but suddenly Willis fell to the floor, having been shot by a random projectile.  They looked up and saw Schuyler and Alfie.  Schuyler was holding his Chachinator and directly at them

*"Choch Quotient is 207.  Entering Stun mode"*

With his unorthodox weapon, Schuyler incapacitated all of the friends except Jacob.  Schuyler took aim.

*"Choch Quotient 1.  No action will be taken.  Now locking."*

"GOD FUCKING DAMMIT!" Schuyler shouted.  "I guess I'm gonna have to do this the old fashioned way."  Schuyler then offered Jacob a bottled cola.  "Does this taste like a roofie to you?"

Jacob opened the bottle and took a big swig of the soda, "No not really.  Why do you..." He then passed out.

The five of them woke up in Schuyler's lab.

Suddenly a door opened, and Schuyler entered.

"What is this!"  This is kidnapping

"This is some bullshit." Kendall cried out. "I wanted to go shopping today."

"With the money I'll be paying you for this, you can do all the shopping you want." Schuyler said.  "Right now, I need you as test subjects for a project I'm working on.  If it works well, it can change the world."

"Change the world how?" asked Ezra.

Schuyler took out his phone, punched in a few things, and then showed them the viral video of Schuyler's road rage incident with Sybil, which Wes had already posted to social media.  "Here.  This is a video that your fucking friend Wes Saeed uploaded earlier today.  "

"Hey!  That's the witch from earlier today!" Willis said.

Schuyler was surprised, but intrigued.  "So you've met Sybil before"

"Yes.  Because of this numbskull's dumbassery, we had a little altercation with Sybil." Jacob stated.

"I'm glad we could be on the same page," said Schuyler.  "Now.  Your question might be, how does that relate to this project.  You see, I have my own little beef with Sybil Shadowsong.  So, I will grant you the use of my creations, which will grant you special abilities in order to face her and her minions in combat."

"SWEET!  We're gonna be superheroes and fight evil!"  Willis exclaimed.

"I always thought I'd look hot in spandex," said Kendall

"Spandex?" Schuyler asked.  "As if I'd allow such crude materials to be used in my creations?  My Nanogarbs are made of only the finest natural raw materials, and laced with Nano-machines.  And No.  I am not giving you these powers to be superheroes.  I'm giving you these powers so you can handle my dirty work.  From now on, you guys will be my on-call assistants.  Now, to come up with a name."

Jacob spoke up, "We already have a name.  The Congregation of Revelations."

"No" Schuyler corrected him.  "You, the black guy, and the spaz in the goggles who can't control his bowels are the 'Congregation of Revelations'.  See, I know all about you.  You need a new name to describe all five of you in relation to your services to me.  Hmmmmm.  How about... Schuyler's Maidens.  Yes.  It has a nice ring to it."

"I'm not a maiden!  I'm a boy." shouted Willis

"Schuyler's Maidens it is." Schuyler nonchalantly continued.  "Now Alfie, bring out the Nanogarbs"

Each of the newly christened "Maidens" were given an article of clothing or accessory.  Jacob received a black leather jacket.  Willis got a blue hooded jacket.  Tia got a teal purse.  And Kendall received a Purple rhythmic gymnastics ribbon.

"Should you ever need to use these, put it on, and then simply say the Activation phrase and call out its name.  Those are written on the tags."

The five some looked at each of their items to see that they had a "tag" attached to them similar to a price tag.  Except the only thing displayed on these tags were the phrase necessary to activate the item.