List of Falling Falling Stars characters

*Falling Falling Stars* is a *Fae Tales Verse* *AU* and spin-off of *The Spoils of the Spoiled*, and part of the *Spoils* series, and contains a large cast of characters.

## Adorabilis ("Stupidhead")

Adorabilis, formerly known as "Stupidhead", was Efnisien's imaginary orange dumbo octopus pet in Efnisien's imaginary house down in the Mariana Trench, which was inspired by his reading a book about deep sea zoology.

#### Life

Initially, Efnisien tore Adorabilis up repeatedly, particularly when Efnisien was stressed, but he also thought of Adorabilis floating down there as part of a calming technique when he was overwhelmed. By the end of the story he cared deeply for Adorabilis, and even spoke to Dr Gary about him.

After Efnisien got his plush octopus, he noted that Adorabilis was only around 'a couple of times', and that he didn't imagine Adorabilis while he was in the hospital, and didn't 'see him anymore' after being discharged. Efnisien finally saw Adorabilis again, dancing at the bottom of the sea, after Efnisien visited Frankie and Sasha's home and spent time with them, and talked about Adorabilis with Sasha. Efnisien 'thought maybe Stupidhead’s secret name was Adorabilis, and he was pleased to finally learn it.' After Dr Gary suggested exploring Adorabilis' home a bit more to see if there were other animals, Efnisien became excited about doing so, because 'he knew that Adorabilis wasn't alone.' When Efnisien later thought about what was with Adorabilis, he thought there 'might be doors down there into other worlds. Maybe it wasn’t just a deep ocean down there. Maybe there were forests. Or lakes. Maybe there were places with dinosaurs, or lands filled with birds.' He also thought there was 'at least a few teleosts were there, like a ribbonfish, or an opah.'

## Alicia

Alicia was one of Efnisien's former classmates and victims, whom he attacked the first time he went to a beach.

## Alistair

Alistair was a servant at the An Fnwy mansion at one point, possibly with a focus on dealing with the garage.

## Ally

Ally was a veterinarian and member of the Loud and Proud Queer Chorus ("LAPQC"). She and Kelly were married and had two kids.

## Anna-Lee

Anna-Lee was an acquaintance of Crielle's. Crielle once used her as a thinly veiled excuse to leave Efnisien alone with Lludd.

#### Appearance

Anthony 'looked like he was in his mid-forties'.

#### Personality

Anthony was generally friendly, and gently encouraged Efnisien to continue attending rehearsals. He appeared to be in a relationship with Teddy.

#### Life

Anthony also ran an independent vocal ensemble that was smaller than LAPQC, alongside Teddy, and produced music.

Anthony performed with LAPQC at a street performance around Christmas.

## Arden Mercury

Arden is Efnisien's boyfriend and dominant, and co-owns and helps run The Cosy Book Corner with Kadek, though his main income comes from working as a professional dom.

#### Appearance

Arden was 29 years old (he was 28 at the story start, and had a birthday while Efnisien was in the hospital).[21]

Arden was shorter than Efnisien and had a 'cute and babyish face'. He had 'floppy, short-ish, straight brown hair . . . [and] two dark brown marks by the left corner of his eye. His ears were small and neat.' He had little feet and 'small, snubby toes.' Arden had a pale complexion. 'Arden was also kind of compact, he wasn’t lanky like Efnisien, or leggy like Crielle and even Gwyn.' Although he was 'short' by Efnisien's standards, Efnisien noticed that he was very fast. When they first met, Arden wore a 'shirt [that] said ‘I like books more than people’ in orange text on black. He wore a long-sleeved flannel shirt in orange and yellow. It didn’t go with his pale complexion.' When Efnisien visited Arden's home for the first time, Arden wore neon pink and yellow socks. During the play party, 'Arden wore black suit pants, a leather belt with a riding crop hanging from it. A charcoal grey button-up collared shirt, and a black tie with a silver tie clip. Arden’s hair was slicked back, and . . . Arden was wearing black eyeliner too, on the upper and lower eyelids.'

#### Personality

Arden was forward, cheerful, incredibly smart, and loved Efnisien. He had PTSD - largely from being assaulted by his older brother Laurie from a young age - and has ADHD and semi-eiditic memory, the latter of which was part of why he can't talk with passengers while driving, and had to listen to music to stay focused. He could talk to passengers when driving around 10 km/h, though. He could be violent if woken up by someone else from a nightmare. The date of Laurie's death was one of his triggers.

He was heavily dependent on honesty in a relationship. He liked playing video games and watching cooking shows and anime. He hated the idea of vacation, though he has traveled a lot for kinbaku. He loved decorating for Christmas, though he identified as 'mostly Agnostic'.

Arden and Efnisien recently talked about how he felt he didn't have time for judo 'anymore and he was thinking of stopping going to the studio to train and had mixed feelings about it.' Arden was also considering dropping some clients, to ease some of his workload.

Arden liked exerting power over Efnisien, even if it was as seemingly simple as driving Efnisien to and from Arden's home. Arden's over-control of Efnisien's life led to friction between them, and they were both working on setting better boundaries with each other, and better allowing Efnisien to have more control in their relationship.

#### Life

Arden was skilled in a variety of things, largely because he has tried so many different things over the years. He's also a judoka, which Laurie suggested as a way to help with his ADHD. He 'was a kenkyu-sei for ages, and then hit fourth dan' around six months before the story start. He still went to practice 'three days a week and a big chunk of Sunday morning' and practices at home. He cut himself off from his parents - his father, for what he did to Laurie and dismissing Arden's concerns - and his mother, for being homophobic and hating Laurie. Arden even took a new last name. He used to do drag as a hobby, where he took the name, 'Miss Mercury Rising'.

Arden brought Efnisien with him to a 101 class at Forest, where Efnisien worked as his assistant. After Efnisien left for the Quiet room to relax a bit, Arden came with Kadek - who'd been called by Gwyn - to the Quiet room, and witnessed Augus reporting Efnisien for assaulting Gwyn and Augus. Arden was surprised that Gwyn was Efnisien's cousin. Arden tried to defend Efnisien to Kadek. When Augus assaulted Efnisien, Arden nearly attacked him, but Kadek stopped him. When Arden and Kadek continued to argue, Efnisien told Arden to stop. Arden tried repeatedly to check on Efnisien, to no avail. Efnisien insisted Arden stay in Forest while Efnisien left. Arden promised to join him by the car in a few minutes, and then began arguing with Kadek again. When Efnisien left, Arden seemingly followed him and shouted for him, and then called Efnisien multiple times, which Efnisien ignored. He eventually called Dr Gary, who didn't tell him much at all. Eventually, Efnisien replied to him with a thunderstorm emoji, and Arden almost immediately called him and asked where Efnisien was, and if Arden could visit. Efnisien consented, and Arden came to the hospital and spent some time with him, where they talked a bit about what happened at and after Forest. While waiting for Efnisien to have a session with Dr Gary, Arden brought Efnisien balloons, flowers, and a card for his hospital room. Arden suggested pressing charges against Augus. Arden also suggested he start asking Efnisien to tell Arden stuff he does or doesn't want from Arden. Arden also eventually talked Efnisien into telling him about Kitson, and noted that he was *very* angry at Augus to the point of nearly doing 'something really illegal when Augus' hurt Efnisien. Arden also offered to come visit in the hospital and just chill until he was kicked out by the nurses. Frankie and Sasha later told Efnisien that Arden had to cancel some of his classes and was staying away from Forest for a while, due to the whole event. At Efnisien's insistence, Arden told him more details about what had happened: how Augus talking about Efnisien assaulting Gwyn spread through socials and forums, and people assumed Arden condoned Efnisien's actions. Arden said some of the reasons he backed out of clubs was because he didn't need to see one-timers who just wanted gossip, and that he didn't owe them his story, and also because he wanted to focus on Efnisien. He also noted his private clients all stuck with him. He also apologized for taking Efnisien to Forest.

Upon learning that Efnisien was going to be discharged soon from the hospital, and that Efnisien didn't want to be alone in his apartment all the time, Arden suggested Efnisien spend some time at Arden's place, doing parallel play. Arden noted that he had his own crisis, and was taking a break from a lot of things, though he was a bit tired lately. When Efnisien brought up talking with Gwyn, Arden offered to be with him during the conversation for emotional support, and firmly explained that if he and Gwyn *did* get in a fight, Arden would soundly win, which distressed Efnisien because he didn't want Gwyn to be hurt (though ultimately Efnisien did not want Arden there for the conversation, so Arden stayed away). When Arden offered to be there for the conversation with Professor Adayemi, Efnisien said yes. After Efnisien's meeting with Gwyn, Arden came to pick Efnisien up, and they talked a bit about things, including the fact that Efnisien didn't want to be called 'baby' for a while at least, due to his memories of Penny. Efnisien also told him about Chrissy.

Arden modified their contract to be more explicit about gifts he could give Efnisien, including furniture for Efnisien's apartment. Efnisien also told him about Kadek being in dom mode around him. When Arden started visiting Efnisien almost constantly, Efnisien realized it was because Arden was afraid he'd try to kill himself again, so Efnisien did his best to reassure Arden that it wouldn't happen in the near future. Arden told Efnisien he wanted Efnisien to move in with him someday. Arden also noted he had a problem driving by the Beth for the time being, in relation to Efnisien's suicide attempt. Arden noted that in trying to make his life less busy, he was learning that he was 'scared of free time and scared of not having anything to do.'

Arden was open to the idea of Efnisien doing cleaning acts of service for him. Efnisien also asked if he could talk more about his past with Arden, because sometimes he wanted to talk with someone who wasn't Dr Gary, and Arden consented. They also discussed Efnisien keeping his apartment for some time, for when he wanted to walk to his appointments with Dr Gary, or when he just needed breaks from Arden and/or Isabelle. When Efnisien was concerned he wasn't giving Arden presents, Arden told him not to get anything, because the whole thing would stress Efnisien out more than not doing it, but left it open in the future for negotiation if it was a problem.

Arden noted he only works at the Cosy Book Corner about once or twice a week now, to ease up his schedule. Arden and Efnisien also negotiated to allow Efnisien to touch Arden more often, particularly for hugs. During the party for Efnisien's 21st birthday, Arden suggested Efnisien pick somewhere they could travel someday. On New Year's Day, Arden noted he wanted to keep working on scaling back his commitments and overscheduling, so he could make more time to be with Efnisien and for himself, and that he wanted to do more scenes with Efnisien.

## Ash Glashtyn

Ash is a store supervisor at Gwyn's workplace, and Augus' brother. Efnisien hated him because he got into Murdock on a scholarship and 'then proceeded to spend like the entire time [he was] there, disrespecting what that education was about.'

## Augus Each Uisge

Augus is Gwyn's boyfriend, and a victim of Efnisien's from when Efnisien attended Murdock.

#### Appearance

When Efnisien saw Augus at Forest, 'Augus had really grown into his features, he was even more handsome now than he’d been back in school, when he hadn’t really filled out that bone structure in his face and looked more elfin. He wore black pants, a long-sleeved black button up, just like Arden. His hair was in a neat ponytail. His vest looked expensive.' His nails were painted black. Augus reminded Efnisien of Crielle.

#### Personality

Efnisien hated Augus, partially because Augus took Gwyn away from Efnisien and Efnisien felt Augus ruined Efnisien's entire life, and partially because of Augus' treatment of Gwyn, as well as Augus' 'disrespect' of Murdock as an educational institution. Efnisien noted that Augus was smart, and considered charming, but that he was actually rude and overproud.

Arden noted that Augus watched Arden's YouTube videos and 'Augus is a regular commenter in the YouTube comments and not always in a good way' and that 'Augus doesn’t have a good reputation' in the kink community.

#### Life

While at Murdock, Augus 'blackmailed plenty of kids and sent more to therapy than Efnisien ever had. People left . . . because they were terrified of Augus and couldn’t keep up with him extorting them for assignments for his racket.' Efnisien stopped talking about him around Gwyn, because it was an easy way to make Gwyn angry. Augus was adopted after the events of *The Spoils of the Spoiled,* and appeared to work in a very good firm, with possible plans to return to university someday. Efnisien also worried that Augus was still abusing Gwyn.

Kadek noted that Augus had attended classes at Forest, but was being watched because of how rough he played with Gwyn there, and 'how much [he ignored] dungeon monitor intervention.' Augus was at Forest during Efnisien's first visit, seemingly noticed Efnisien in the Quiet room and told Gwyn to get Kadek, and then walked in on Kitson assaulting Efnisien, and was seemingly surprised to find Efnisien being the victim, rather than Kitson. He mocked the idea that Efnisien was a submissive, but still untied the rope Kitson had put on him. Augus commented that he believed Efnisien still had Gwyn wrapped around his finger, and was grooming Arden and/or others with his submissive 'act'. When Gwyn arrived with Kadek and Arden, Augus reported Efnisien's past predatory actions against Augus and Gwyn to them and requested Efnisien be permanently barred from the club. Augus appeared confused by Arden's defense of Efnisien, and assumed Arden didn't 'understand', so Augus 'demonstrated' by physically assaulting Efnisien. Kadek got between Augus and Arden when Arden made to attack him. Kadek warned Augus for his actions against Efnisien, and Augus' past behavior, banned Efnisien from Forest and any other clubs Kadek owned, then suspended Augus. Augus told people at Forest that Efnisien had assaulted Gwyn, which spread through social media and forums. Augus was later 'banned pretty much from the city club circuit because Kadek knows everyone.'

## Bel

Bel was Flora's partner and dominant at the play party.

#### Appearance

Bel wore 'leather pants, a leather vest, and . . . had tattoos all over her black skin'. She was shorter than Flora.

#### Personality

Bel was friends with Arden and Kadek. Efnisien doesn't like Flora and Bel because of how they talked about the scene and him, and what Arden should do to Efnisien.

## Bridget ("Bridge")

Bridge is a member of LAPQC, and has a wife who's an opera singer.

#### Appearance

'She had short, black hair. She was fat', short, and butch. She smoked and wore heavy boots.

#### Personality

Bridge was blunt and protective of other members, particularly since she was abused in the past by an ex-girlfriend (which gives her balance issues), but she sometimes went too far, and often ignored boundaries. She scared off new members in the past.

Teddy implied Bridge liked Eric Whitacre.

Bridge and Nate hate each other.

#### Life

Back when Nate was dating Christian, Nate confided in her about Christian's behavior, and Bridge told Nate he 'wasn't trying hard enough for [his] partner.' When Nate tried harder in the relationship, he nearly died, but Janusz got Nate to confide in him, too, which possibly helped save him and lead to Nate breaking up with Christian. Christian left the choir, taking those who were on his side with him, and blamed Nate for everything. Bridge took Christian's side as well. She also discouraged Janusz from dating Nate initially.

Although Efnisien initially liked Bridge, when she found out that Efnisien had hurt people in the past, she confronted him about it, which scared him away from the choir, though he attended two more terror-ridden rehearsals where he did his best to avoid Bridge or making her feel like he was too close to her. She later called him after he stopped coming to choir, and set up a meeting with him, which terrified Efnisien. She later called Dr Gary, with Efnisien's consent, to fact-check Efnisien's statements. When Nate later told Efnisien about how Bridge acted when Nate confided in her about Christian, Efnisien was angry at Bridge on Nate's behalf.

## Chandra

Dr Gary found Efnisien transcription work with Chandra, and let her know 'he was advocating on behalf of a Hillview outpatient.'

#### Personality

Chandra praised Efnisien's work, which he was grateful for, and was very 'personable'.

#### Life

Chandra was a PhD candidate working on a thesis for slurs. Chandra also sent Efnisien other audio transcription jobs. Chandra was the one to direct him to Professor Adayemi. Professor Adayemi noted that she and Chandra would give Efnisien a recommendation for courses at the university.

## Charlotte

Charlotte was one of the nurses who looked after Efnisien at the hospital after his suicide attempt.

## Christian

Christian is Nate's ex. Efnisien reminded Nate of him, which is one major reason Nate doesn't like Efnisien.

#### Personality

Christian had PTSD, and would blame the PTSD and Nate triggering it for all of Christian's problems, and would manipulate Nate whenever Nate tried to live his life or even tried to get Christian to go to therapy or point out they weren't doing well as a couple.

#### Life

Christian used to attend the choir, and was a very good tenor. He met Nate there, and they started dating. Trying to keep their relationship nearly killed Nate, and it was seemingly confiding in Janusz that gave Nate the ability to break the relationship off. Nate noted that Janusz getting angry about Christian's behavior was a big deal, and it possibly played into the break-up. Christian ended up leaving the choir, blaming Nate for everything, and took a part of the choir with him who believed him.

#### Appearance

Chrissy had brown hair and a nice smile, as well as brown eyes.

#### Personality

Chrissy was nice to Efnisien when the other staff weren't, like when he wet the bed and needed to clean the bedsheets. She would sometimes tickle Efnisien's feet.

Efnisien called her 'Chrissy' in secret, seemingly because likely Crielle thought that you 'were supposed to use names *properly.* No one was supposed to have nicknames in that house. Nicknames were for the uncouth.' Even Crielle liked her. Chrissy might have been the favorite maid of Crielle's whom Penny killed.

#### Life

She worked at the An Fnwy estate for years, and lived in the house. Efnisien thinks he voiced a preference for Chrissy over Penny around Penny that made Penny jealous enough to murder Chrissy. Afterward, all the maids disliked Efnisien, and, after this and other things in his life, Efnisien began destroying his toys because they were too innocent, and Crielle thought that innocence was a weakness to be destroyed. Gwyn accused Efnisien of helping Penny murder Chrissy.

## Crielle ap Nudd

Crielle was Efnisien's aunt and pseudo mother, as well as Gwyn's biological mother, Lludd's wife, Penny's sister, and Euroswydd's sister-in-law.

#### Appearance

Crielle had 'blue eyes and [platinum] blonde hair'.

#### Personality

Crielle was seemingly considered a 'gifted' child. She 'really loved science'.

She never much cared for food other than it looking good, and was focused on appearance, so she taught Efnisien that food that tasted good was likely bad for him, even when he was a toddler, and would punish him for being excited about food.

She was also emotionally abusive to Efnisien and Gwyn even as infants, and otherwise hated babies. She used touch as a reward, making it feel like a rare thing for Efnisien to experience and something which he had to perform for, though she generally disliked physical intimacy.

She looked down on people who celebrated their own birthdays, and insisted they weren't worth celebrating.

She took obsessive notes and videos of her abuse of Gwyn, and hated him. 'Crielle spoke like one of those old-school actors, from the fifties maybe, in cinema . . . [S]he never swore, she never stumbled over her words, she never stuttered, she almost never paused in the middle of a sentence. Everything always came out like…fully formed.' She hated when Efnisien swore around her when it wasn't directed at Gwyn.

She 'didn’t like nature enough to be that close to it.' She was seemingly intolerant of sexism directed at herself, though she had little regard for it directed at other women. She seemingly hated permanent body modification like tattoos. ’She was quite judgmental of people, and disliked a wide variety of things about anyone in particular, whether it was their queerness, weight/other aspects of their appearance, or apparent poverty/low class status. Efnisien noted that she was never afraid of anyone or anything, particularly of getting caught, even when she attacked him. She also had no defined trigger for her anger. She would also frequently gaslight Efnisien. She seemingly believed her family deserved things because they were rich. Crielle and Penny 'love each other a ton.' Efnisien once thought that 'she was up against it, trying her hardest to fit into a world that didn’t really have a place for her, and that she was too smart for most of the people around her, and that actually she was really misunderstood, and that she deserved better.' She also used to tell Efnisien that having an extra child (him) was a lot of extra work, to explain why she gave Gwyn more attention than Efnisien. Efnisien noted that she 'never had much time for religious displays, because she didn’t believe in any higher being in the universe, other than herself.' She would donate money as a strategy to build up good will to later forgive crimes by her family. Efnisien noted she possibly found 'mass harm really disgusting' and would instead target people on an individual level, so charity as a concept didn't bother her.

#### Life

Crielle had a background in science or chemistry, and was one of the smartest in her class, but worked as a 'housewife'. She took over caring for Efnisien inasmuch as she did when Efnisien's parents left him in her care. She micromanaged his life, including how and where he could travel, and even what he wore. She was otherwise emotionally and physically abusive to Efnisien since he was a toddler (and Gwyn), sexually assaulted him, physically assaulted him by stabbing him five times in the gut to the point that it put Efnisien in the hospital at their last meeting and nearly killed him, and encouraged him along the path to being an animal abuser and becoming a rapist and serial killer. She collected paraphernalia from serial killers, and showed it to Efnisien, even as a young child. She also introduced other hard topics to Efnisien at least from when he was a toddler, such as sexual assault. She fed Efnisien pills when she found him annoying, like when he needed comfort as a child after nightmares, and avoided taking Efnisien and Gwyn to doctors, because she distrusted them. She had Efnisien babysit some children once, expecting him to hurt them, but 'he’d mostly just sat there and put on movies for them and didn’t move the entire time and made sure they had something to eat.'

She also physically groomed Efnisien in the past, to teach him shaving or to clean his nails, and was very harsh. She also took advantage of Penny and Euroswydd abandoning Efnisien to manipulate him into pleasing her, saying she could abandon him, too.

After the settlement with Gwyn, Crielle and Lludd left the country. Efnisien thought that Crielle was the reason he couldn't access the money Penny and Euroswydd left for Efnisien to live on after he left Hillview, as another subtle form of revenge.

When Efnisien was in crisis after leaving Forest, he called all of Crielle's burner phone numbers he had written down, and finally got in touch with the one using her pseudonym of 'Cecilia Desjardins'. Crielle called him a ghost and a worm, and was patronizing, then threatened to kill him before hanging up.

## Dave

Dave appears to be a friend of Kadek's who made floggers on commission.

## Professor Damilola Adayemi ("Professor Adayemi"/"Damilola")

Damilola is one of Efnisien's clients for whom he does audio transcription.

#### Appearance

Damilola 'was short and round, with dark brown skin, and she wore glasses with cool pink metal frames. Her hair was thick and healthy, spring coils with occasional corkscrews of bright pink that matched her glasses.' When Efnisien first saw her, 'she wore a t-shirt with a pink unicorn on it, and jeans.' She was also younger than Efnisien expected her to be.

#### Personality

Damilola was strict, but fair, and also seems to suffer from insomnia.

#### Life

Damilola 'specialises in racism and microaggressions when she’s not writing about' Afrofuturism and seems to work with a team. She respected Efnisien's ability as a transcriber and wanted to meet him, though Efnisien put it off for a long time, with advice from Dr Gary, due to Efnisien's issues with authoritative older women stemming from Crielle.

When Efnisien let Damilola know he had a medical emergency, she said 'she hoped he got well sooner rather than later, because no one transcribed as fast as he did and with so few errors'. She 'sent him files to transcribe as soon as she knew he was discharged, though she’d left a note in one of her emails saying he wasn’t to tax himself.'

A short while after Efnisien was discharged from the hospital, he was contacted by Damilola asking again to meet up with him. Although Efnisien was panicked by the meeting, he eventually agreed to it. When Efnisien finally met her, Damilola noted she just wanted to get to know him better and notify him about how her schedule would be changing in the following year, and to learn what his university background was. She was surprised that he had no university background and hadn't graduated high school. She suggested he go to university if he wanted to, and look into bridging courses to cover not graduating high school. She also gave him pamphlets, and said she and Chandra would recommend him. She further noted she wasn't planning on publishing as much in the following year as she did in this one, and that since since he needed more hours, she wanted to circulate Efnisien's 'name around the departments of sociology and media analysis'. She also insisted Efnisien call her by her first name, since that was a norm at the university.

## Efnisien ap Wledig

Efnisien is the story protagonist, and was 20 years old at the start of the story, but turned 21 sometime during the story, is asexual, and Arden's boyfriend and sub.

#### Appearance

Efnisien was quite tall, and had soft blonde hair and blue eyes. After going to the hospital, his hair grew longer. He had pale skin. Near the start of the story, his difficulties eating made him thin enough that Gwyn noticed that he wasn't eating enough. He had long, narrow feet. He had extensive self-harm scars all over his body. He also had scars on his back, which he didn't remember the origin of, though he thought they might be from Penny. Arden noted that some of the scars on Efnisien's stomach were 'mean', as opposed to other scars Efnisien had that seemed to have healed well, which was likely because Efnisien re-opened some of the wounds intentionally after surgery and tore stitches, which also led to infection.

#### Personality

Efnisien disliked feeling degraded and hated being treated as an object. He had eiditic memory (with numbers and words), Pure O, PTSD, agoraphobia, alexithymia, and had difficulty processing certain foods due to his injury from Crielle's assault, which could cause intense digestive issues. Since he would sometimes accidentally eat Gwyn's meals at the An Fnwy mansion (and sometimes on purpose so Gwyn wouldn't have to), which were poisoned by Crielle, he also had issues eating. Crielle also taught Efnisien that food that tasted good was bad for him, and even punished him for being excited about food, which gave him more difficulties around eating, possibly including why he had difficulty eating around others. He also had issues accepting food from people because Crielle used to drug him to make him stop bothering her. He also had issues with cars, partially because he'd never driven and money concerns, but also because he'd experienced physical and mental abuse in cars from Lludd, and it was a form of Crielle controlling his life when she restricted him from using public transport. Because of this, he often walked, seldom took advantage of taxis and similar options, or relied on others - like Arden (and Bridge and Janusz) driving him. He also couldn't own anything red (though he recently handled red books Dr Gary gave him), and avoided handling knives and fire, or being around animals or children, though he was more and more able to be around animals safely. He had particular difficulties dealing with older women, due to Crielle, and male medical professionals, due to Henton, and mouth-to-mouth kisses, because of Crielle. Crielle also taught him that although he was tested as gifted, 'it was useless to be gifted unless he learned how to mask it and turn those skills towards something practical.' He had to avoid reading true crime as part of his therapy, and preferred nonfiction, as he never found fiction relatable.

When stressed, he sometimes self-harmed, a habit he had since childhood, through Crielle trained him out of it by and large, save for when Efnisien would self-harm out of curiosity. He sometimes self-harmed when he thought about hurting others. Crielle criticized his body at least from when he was a toddler in ways that made him hate his body, and made him only view it as a tool for her purposes, to the point that he self-harmed, though he was working on not doing that. Efnisien 'kept suicide as a card he could use at any time, a reminder he had an escape, a way out. It was the last thing he could do to complete Crielle’s intention towards him, and it would make her happy. It was a way he could make the person he loved most, pleased with him.' He also had intrusive thoughts involving serial killers, and kept a tally board to count all his intrusive thoughts to pay attention to how much time they take away, but also so he could tell that he didn't have them all the time. Efnisien also dealt with near-constant fear from his PTSD, which caused some of his more violent thoughts. He had a strong belief that everyone would leave him, likely beginning with his parents abandoning him, being alone for most of his life, and Crielle abandoning him. That belief was one major reason he liked Gwyn's visits, because Gwyn supposedly never abandoned him, and would stick with him after Efnisien's new friends and acquaintances, including Dr Gary, grow tired of Efnisien. He also believed he should be punished for his actions in the past, with jail if capital punishment wasn't an option.

He liked the wind and the sea, and stormy days, where there's a lot of 'noise . . . but it's a steady noise.' Efnisien struggled making decisions for himself, particularly when it comes to activities with others (and particularly Arden).

He was working on setting boundaries, particularly with Arden. He sort of rediscovered his love of stuffed animals (though he found it embarrassing because Crielle taught him it's juvenile) and started buying plush of underwater creatures. Once he obtained them, a physical response to one of the octopuses revealed that he had issues with innocence, as Crielle had impressed that innocence was a weakness to be destroyed, and Efnisien hated innocent people who seemingly had no worries or awareness of the evils of the world. Part of this was related to Penny murdering his favorite maid, Chrissy. He realized recently how much he liked color. Efnisien also realized 'he’d hated his entire stay at Hillview. Even if he’d never met Henton, even if he’d never been beaten up, he would’ve hated his entire time there. It wasn’t juvenile detention, but it wasn’t freedom, either.'

#### Life

In *The Spoils of the Spoiled*, Efnisien put incriminating information about Crielle poisoning and planning to poison Gwyn onto a USB, and gave it to Augus to give Gwyn a chance to escape their family, for which Crielle stabbed Efnisien five times in the gut and cut him off from the family. Efnisien later attempted suicide by reopening his stomach wounds. After leaving the hospital, he went to Hillview, where he was diagnosed with Pure O. While there, he was also assaulted by about six other residents in the showers and multiple times by Henton, his therapist. When Dr Gary discovered Henton's abuses, Henton lost his license and was kicked out of the facility, and Dr Gary took over Efnisien's therapy. Three years after leaving Hillview, Efnisien lived on his own in a small apartment in the same general area where the An Fnwy mansion was. After losing everything he had at the An Fnwy estate, he got second or third-hand clothing and found furniture on the side of roads. He used to review surveillance footage 'on behalf of a big data company' as part of paying the bills, along with 'transcribing academic lectures and recordings for one Professor, one Associate Professor, and one PhD student who could afford his rates', but switched entirely to audio transcription after Arden suggested it, as he can earn more money that way, and it's less stressful. He is currently part of a poetry group and a singing ensemble, with a widening circle of friends.

He served as Arden's assistant during a 101 class at Forest, which he enjoyed, particularly because he could see Arden being good at what he did, until Efnisien started having intrusive thoughts. While he was relaxing in the Quiet room, Kitson came to see him, abused Efnisien's trust to trap him in rope, ignored his safewords, and otherwise mocked Efnisien. Efnisien tried to call Arden for help, but Kitson stopped him, and then Augus showed up. After Kitson fled, Augus confronted Efnisien, during which Efnisien was mostly non-verbal. Augus untied him, after which Gwyn showed up with Arden and Kadek. As Augus reported Efnisien's assaults of Augus and Gwyn to Kadek and requested Efnisien be barred permanently from Forest, Efnisien realized that Gwyn was likely Augus' submissive, and blamed himself for making Gwyn that way. When Arden defended him, and Kadek grew angry, Efnisien blamed himself for ruining their friendship. To 'demonstrate' what Efnisien had done to Arden, Augus physically assaulted Efnisien in front of them all, after which Arden nearly attacked Augus, though Kadek intervened. Kadek suspended Augus for assaulting Efnisien, and then banned Efnisien from Forest and any other clubs Kadek co-owned, because of Efnisien's past history. Efnisien intervened to get Arden to stop defending him to Kadek, admitting to what Augus said he'd done, and noting, 'It’s not worth it, defending me, it’s not like Augus is wrong. I did the things he accused me of. I did worse. If I’d known he’d be here, I would’ve never have come. He shouldn’t have to deal with that.’ Then said he'd leave and lied that he'd wait by Arden's car. He thanked Augus for helping (with Kitson), but told Arden to stay in Forest. Efnisien decided that he had to end his relationship with Arden himself, because Arden would never do it, and left the club, ignoring Arden shouting for him. Efnisien returned home, hiding from Arden. Gwyn came banging on his door and trying to get into the apartment, and talked to him through the door, without Efnisien responding. Efnisien became more upset as Gwyn talked to him, and ultimately called Crielle on one of her burner phones, which only made him more scared and upset, and settle on suicide as a way to deal with many things. After taking a rideshare to the Beth, and getting on the bridge, he flashbacked to his early sessions with Dr Gary, and ultimately called Dr Gary, letting Dr Gary know where he was.

Dr Gary kept Efnisien on the phone while driving to the Beth, and ultimately talked him back from the edge. They negotiated where Efnisien would go: either HIllview or a hospital, and Efnisien went with the hospital, though he hated both options (but Hillview was more traumatizing by far) and insisted he was fine. After they arrived at the hospital, Efnisien told Dr Gary that he'd called Crielle. While in the hospital, he was medicated. He later saw a series of nurses, met again with Dr Gary, though Efnisien was too out of it to properly talk about what had happened or how he was doing, and was later terrified by a visit from Lija. He was comforted by some of the nurses, and saw Tahlia, though he was nervous about the visit, and ultimately sent Arden a thunderstorm emoji. He accepted Arden's call and allowed Arden to visit him, though the visit was stressful, and Arden went to the cafeteria while Efnisien had a session with Dr Gary. Efnisien told Dr Gary about Kitson, Augus, Lija, and his upset with Arden.

Arden and Efnisien talked afterward, and on Arden's next visit, after talking about what Efnisien wanted or didn't want, Arden visiting in the hospital just to hang out, and about Kitson and Augus, Efnisien admitted he loved Arden for the first time aloud. While they spent more time together, Efnisien revealed that he has hypervigilance because of Crielle and Lludd: he had to keep track of them at all times, and Crielle would punish him for not paying attention to her,

During Dr Gary's next visit, Efnisien noted that he didn't like his apartment, and he still worried about meeting Professor Adayemi. He also talked about Crielle, and realized that although he stilled loved Crielle, he didn't want her in his life. He also realized he didn't want Gwyn in his life, either, and reflected on how Gwyn didn't know him, didn't stand up for him when Augus assaulted him at Forest, and even when Gwyn was seemingly trying to help, his words still hurt Efnisien. Efnisien also noted, ‘I know I deserve Gwyn being angry at me . . . But I’m so tired of listening to him and not knowing when he’s going to say something that’s just really fucking mean. And I’m tired of feeling like I have to put up with it. Like if he wants to sit down and talk to me about the past, and actually hold me accountable by having me listen to that, then okay, that’s different. But he just visits and acts like everything is fine and then casually talks about how like- he never expected that I could basically be a *person.* And maybe- . . . Maybe I was a person the whole time!' Efnisien was also worried that if he ever had had another breakdown, and Gwyn knew and visited, Efnisien didn't know if he'd survive.

While talking more with Arden about Gwyn and Augus, Efnisien noted that what they did in their intimate relationship was disgusting, and Efnisien thought he and Augus made Gwyn want those things. Arden pointed out Efnisien's disgust likely had nothing to do with kink, but with Efnisien considering anything about Gwyn's sex life being disgusting. Efnisien also asked if Arden would be his next of kin on his medical paperwork, rather than Gwyn, and Arden agreed. At the next and last for a while visit with Gwyn, Efnisien informed Gwyn that he was no longer Efnisien's next of kin on paperwork, and that they should spend time apart for both of their own good, particularly because Efnisien needed to be around people who liked him for himself.

When Efnisien discussed his panic with Dr Gary about meeting Professor Adayemi, Dr Gary reminded Efnisien of the positive experiences he'd had with with the female nurses at the hospital, and those were also women with authority over him. Efnisien noted that he liked her, and wanted her to like him. They also set up a system whereby Efnisien would contact Dr Gary if his suicidality reached a 7 or 8 out of 10 on a scale.

The visit with Professor Adayemi was initially stressful, but Efnisien was surprised how supportive she was, and how she wanted to help him get more work, and then recommended he try bridging courses so he could take university classes. When asked what he might want to major in, Efnisien noted, 'I kind of like the idea of going into the humanities.’ He liked 'the idea of learning a subject that made him feel more human, that helped him understand people better'. He came out of the experience excited.

After spending time with Arden and Kadek, Efnisien realized he 'was capable of having friends. It wasn’t bad. Arden knew what he’d done, Kadek even knew what he’d done, and they still liked him. No one was going to kill him. He’d never been a wolf, he’d just pretended to be one, but he’d still hurt people and animals anyway.' When Arden fondly called him a villain for coming up with an amusingly terrible idea for Kadek to chew on, Efnisien 'realised that this was the kind of ‘villain’ he was okay with being. The one that wasn’t really a villain at all. Just a person that someone else could gently tease and make fun of. And then they’d all laugh.' Dr Gary later pointed out that Efnisien seems to be able to relax better with other people around him than on his own, which Efnisien realized was true, even going back to his time with Gwyn when they were younger. Efnisien noted he wasn't allowed to have friends growing up, so that he could better see other people as prey. Dr Gary noted that Efnisien 'worked harder than anyone else in that family to actually have a *family*'.

Efnisien noted that he likes cleaning homes, particularly as a form of service for Arden, because he likes doing things for Arden. Arden was open to the idea, and they talked about how they'd work it into their relationship. Efnisien also asked if he could talk more about his past with Arden, because sometimes he wanted to talk with someone who wasn't Dr Gary, and Arden consented. They also discussed Efnisien keeping his apartment for some time, for when he wanted to walk to his appointments with Dr Gary, or when he just needed breaks from Arden and/or Isabelle. When Efnisien was concerned he wasn't giving Arden presents, Arden told him not to get anything, because the whole thing would stress Efnisien out more than not doing it, but left it open in the future for negotiation if it was a problem.

Efnisien likes learning, and considers academia and books in particular 'old friends'. Dr Gary suggested that the potential reason Efnisien did this was because he wasn't 'permitted to have any friends growing up, so knowledge became personified in a friendly way', and when it resonated with Efnisien, he realized that it was part of the reason he wasn't so focused on buying and reading new books as much lately, because he had more human friends in his life. Efnisien considered finishing high school with bridging courses, and testing out the waters for which university topics he might like via his transcription work. When they talked about Efnisien's spending habits due to his lack of money when he got of Hillview, and how his thoughts on money evolved as he became connected to Arden and got better work, Dr Gary pointed out that Efnisien seemed to be proud of his ability to 'live independently on a small income', which isn't a bad thing.

Efnisien attended the Leaves end of year meet, and hung out with Han Yuen and Leo, and even planned future meet-ups with them, and more things involving poetry. He later chatted with Nate alone, and learned about Nate's past, and came to a kind of accord with him, acknowledging why Nate hates him, but feeling sympathetic for what Nate went through with his abusive ex, and how Nate views himself and his life.

In their last session in the story, Efnisien noted that good things in his life used to feel temporary with Crielle, and that he felt like the good things he had *now* would surely leave, as well, and Dr Gary noted that, 'Life is on your terms now; the window is *yours',* reminding Efnisien that he could live at his own pace. Efnisien also talked about how his understanding of how he could be in relationships as an asexual person had changed.

While on a date with Arden, Efnisien noted that he is still generally uncomfortable with crowds, and particularly children. Arden and Efnisien also negotiated to allow Efnisien to touch Arden more often, particularly for hugs. On New Year's Day, Efnisien told Arden he was interested in being photographed, and thought about preserving his memories with Arden for the future. Efnisien noted he planned to finish high school, and that he wanted to try living with Arden.

## Euroswydd ("Euro")

Euro is Penny's husband, Efnisien's father, brother-in-law to Lludd and Crielle, and Gwyn's uncle.

#### Personality

Efnisien said his parents 'never wanted a kid'.

Efnisien noted that Euro also kills people, but he's 'just not as into it as [Penny] is . . . because he’s a voyeur and she’s more of a performer. He’s usually cleaning up after her. But god knows it turns him on like anything when she’s killing people.’ When Euro kills people, he gets a particular expression on his face like he's enjoying it in a particular way.

Efnisien noted that Crielle found Euro's form of serial killing gross due to the way Euro enjoys it.

#### Life

He and Penny spend most of their lives on cruises, and abandoned their only son seemingly near his birth, leaving him in Crielle's care. Euro 'barely talked to [Efnisien]. Sometimes he’d ask [Efnisien if he] was getting good grades at school.' Efnisien's parents visited him once in the hospital after Crielle's assault, and technically left him a stipend after Efnisien left Hillview, but didn't leave Efnisien a way to access it, likely at Crielle's behest, and have not contacted him since the hospital visit, or left him a way to reach out. Efnisien thinks Euro is 'probably off making sure [Penny] isn’t killing a ton of people on cruise ships. Just a normal amount of people.’

## Dr Felicity Hope ("Dr Hope")

Dr Hope is the general doctor to whom Dr Gary referred Efnisien after Efnisien hurt his hand.

#### Appearance

Dr Hope 'was a quiet, bird-like woman with straight, jet-black hair and black eyes and light brown skin.'

#### Life

Efnisien is intimidated by her because of his issues with authoritative older women, due to Crielle's abuses, though he listened to her encourage him to see a specialist to follow-up on his abdominal surgery and stomach pain. He visited her a second time on Dr Gary's insistence.

## Ffion

Ffion was of the nurses who treated Efnisien in the hospital.

#### Personality

She was brusque. She was also angry at Lija's visit, and brought Efnisien coloring books. Vicki noted she's abrupt with everyone, but a 'good egg beneath the tough shell.'

#### Life

When Arden begged for some more time with Efnisien at the hospital on the grounds it was his birthday, she grudgingly gave him 10 more minutes.

## Flora

Flora was Bel's partner and sub at the play party.

#### Personality

She's friends with Arden and Kadek. Efnisien doesn't like Flora and Bel because of how they talked about the scene and him, and what Arden should do to Efnisien.

#### Appearance

He appeared to be in his fifties, and when Efnisien first met him, he 'had white hair, and a white beard, and he carried a satchel with him, and wore nice leather shoes.' He also 'wore a plain shirt, and simple shorts' and 'had a gold chain around his neck, that was secured with a small padlock.' He appears to be older than Sasha.

#### Personality

Sasha noted that Frankie's family didn't act like a family, and he was lonely as a child. He was harassed in school for being neurodivergent.

#### Life

They attended Efnisien's first play party together, and spoke with him. He's friends with Arden and Kadek. Sasha called him her 'forest man' and 'druid'. In the past, Frankie and Sasha lived in a nudist colony, which was anti-swinger and anti-kink. Frankie found naturism 'through Christian naturism, and then became a Buddhist, and now' he's a Druid. Frankie is good with his hands and does a lot of work around their property. He plans to have bigger groups of druids come over to the property 'to do their nature rituals' once more work has been done on it. He also knits.

Efnisien likes Frankie and Sasha. They came to visit him in the hospital. They also let him know some of the things that had happened with Arden since the incidents at Forest. Efnisien told them the rumors about him were probably true, and that Efnisien was horrible and hurt someone. He also wanted them to leave, but didn't say anything. Efnisien later visited their property and talked with them about making friends and his relationship with Arden, and had a nice time.

## Dr Gary Konowalous ("Dr Gary")

Dr Gary runs Hillview, and formerly turfed Efnisien onto Henton as Efnisien was not on the same level of need as Dr Gary's usual clients, as Dr Gary tends to take the hardest clients, whom no one else will see. When Dr Gary discovered that Henton had been abusing Efnisien, Dr Gary took over Efnisien's therapy, partially as penance for his mistake, but also because Dr Gary didn't trust others with Efnisien's care.

Dr Gary is a major character in *The Moon is Down.*

#### Appearance

Dr Gary is as tall as Efnisien. When he talked to Efnisien on the Beth, he wore 'navy blue pyjamas' and he drove a 'dark sedan'.

#### Personality

Dr Gary is friends with Mika.

Efnisien noted that 'sometimes he really did think that Dr Gary sent him to Henton' so that Efnisien could be abused, on purpose.

#### Life

At the start of their sessions, Efnisien was non-verbal (and afraid, with intrusive thoughts), which eventually escalated to Efnisien throwing a cup of coffee at him. Dr Gary used to say, 'Slow is fast. Efnisien being allowed to take ten sessions to say a single word to Dr Gary would allow for faster progress than if Dr Gary pressured Efnisien to talk every session. Every increment of progress, no matter how many months it took: ‘The slower the better,’ Dr Gary would say.'

Dr Gary 'used to fly around the world for conferences and consultations'. After taking Efnisien on, 'and stepping up sessions with [his] therapist, and [his] supervisor', Dr Gary realized he was working too hard, and 'couldn't keep doing it forever.' So he drastically lowered the amount of travel he did, and started liking his job more as the balance of his clients changed. He believes it made him a better therapist.

Dr Gary put Efnisien in contact with his first transcription job. When Dr Gary learned that Efnisien never had access to his stipend from his parents, he immediately pressed for a modification to Efnisien's payment of his therapy bills, which helped ease Efnisien's financial stress. Dr Gary initially suggested Efnisien look for more group socializing opportunities, either in group therapy - which Efnisien rejected - or in hobby groups or something similar, in order to increase Efnisien's support network. Efnisien has intrusive thoughts that Dr Gary doesn't want to see him anymore, and Dr Gary has tried to reassure him. Dr Gary was not happy about Crielle's idea that innocence had to be destroyed.

Efnisien noted: ‘It makes me mad sometimes . . . that Dr Gary saw tapes of what the other therapist did.’

When Efnisien went to the Beth, he ultimately called Dr Gary, who begged Efnisien to let him know where Efnisien was, and when Efnisien finally did, Dr Gary told him to stay in place while Dr Gary headed over. Dr Gary kept Efnisien on the phone while driving to the Beth, and ultimately talked him back from the edge. He gave Efnisien a blanket he kept in his truck (with some dog hair on it) to keep Efnisien warm while in the car, and then they negotiated where Efnisien would go: either HIllview or a hospital, and Efnisien went with the hospital. After they arrived, Efnisien told Dr Gary that he'd called Crielle. Dr Gary stayed by his side while he was checked in and had been settled in a bed. Gary left and returned later to check in with Efnisien about what had happened before Efnisien's suicide attempt, but Efnisien was unable to answer. Dr Gary came to visit again while Arden was first visiting Efnisien, and finally spoke to Arden in person. Afterward, Dr Gary had a session with Efnisien where they talked about Lija, Tahlia, and Efnisien's anger. They later had a session where Dr Gary discussed Efnisien's continued love of Crielle as a mother, even though Efnisien might not want to be around her, and how Gwyn was potentially dangerous to Efnisien's well-being.

Dr Gary noted he is taking a few weeks off for the end of the year, which would leave Efnisien without some sessions with him for a while, but he and Efnisien made plans for who Efnisien would see if he needed. When Efnisien offered up the idea of moving to once-a-week sessions after the new year, Dr Gary pointed out how impressive it was that Efnisien was realizing he was better able to handle things without so much therapy, and that the sessions were a lot to deal with twice a week. At their last session in the story, Efnisien asked if Dr Gary wished he'd sent Efnisien to another therapist, and Dr Gary said no, and that being Efnisien's therapist had changed the way Dr Gary lived, for the better.

## George

George works at Arden's dojo. It's implied that he's a promoted student, and Arden says George is likely to quit in 2-3 months, like most members in similar situations. He reached out to Arden to try and guilt trip him into teaching again, and Arden hates that he does that.

## Gulvi Dubna Vajat

Gulvi is Augus' and Gwyn's friend, and currently engaged to Kayla. She attends university.

## Gwyn ap Nudd

Gwyn is Efnisien's cousin, and Crielle and Lludd's son, as well as Penny and Euro's nephew. He possibly works as a regional manager at a supermarket.

#### Appearance

Efnisien loved Gwyn's smile. He also said that Gwyn's hair was softer than his own. His hair 'was thicker and healthier, it had product in it now so it wasn’t fuzzy like Efnisien’s was. His clothing looked good. Not ‘rich people good’ but like Gwyn had picked it out himself and was happy with it.' He has 'huge' feet. His hair was also a paler blonde than Crielle's.

#### Personality

Crielle used to poison his food, which made him 'get obsessed with food and avoiding it', which is 'a very mild manifestation of what they think is maybe obsessional thinking and post-trauma', but he's since seen someone about it, and is eating more. Efnisien used to torture him, largely as a way to keep Gwyn dependent on Efnisien, so that Gwyn wouldn't leave him.

Gwyn considered himself Efnisien's jailer or parole officer, and would remind Efnisien to act in certain ways, ignoring the progress Efnisien made, and assuming Efnisien was hurting Arden. He also assumed, wrongly, that Efnisien had killed people, and liked it. Efnisien admitted he made his life seem better than it is to Gwyn, because he was raised by Crielle to make others feel like he's happy.

Efnisien noted that 'Gwyn’s violence was incandescent and animal, not even clinically detached like Lludd’s anger, but magnificent.' Gwyn was often called out by referees during wrestling matches for being too violent.

Efnisien considered Gwyn, 'an angel in a family of demons.' He wanted Gwyn to be his brother. Efnisien noted almost all the maids at the An Fnwy estate liked Gwyn, though he disdained them all. 'As more time passed, his love for Gwyn burned differently, and took a different shape. He felt like his cousin was somehow radioactive, like torbernite, desperately beautiful, but deadly at the same time. It wasn’t Gwyn’s fault. Ultimately, it was a mess of Efnisien’s own making. His own cruelty had created that toxicity, and his own actions had made that danger patent.' Arden noted that Gwyn had been to some of Arden's classes with Augus, and that 'Gwyn seemed niced enough.'

#### Life

He has a dog named Silver. While Efnisien was assaulting Augus, and secretly snuck a USB of incriminating evidence on Crielle into Augus' pocket, Gwyn, who didn't know about the USB, tried to beat Efnisien to death, though Efnisien felt the beating was justified. Gwyn then said that he would visit Efnisien *only* if Efnisien went to Hillview until Efnisien was an outpatient. Efnisien also gave Gwyn permission to contact Dr Gary about Efnisien's care. Gwyn visited Efnisien in the hospital after Efnisien was jumped by other residents and 'told [him] not to get [himself] in a situation like that again.' Gwyn also used to visit Efnisien once a month and bring him reference books. Gwyn having to push back one of their visits directly jumpstarted a great deal of Efnisien's recent healing, and led to Efnisien going to The Cosy Book Corner, where Efnisien met Arden.

Since Efnisien started accepting that Gwyn was a major reason Efnisien wasn't recovering as much, Efnisien pushed to increase the time between their interactions, though Gwyn initially pushed back, refusing to respect Efnisien's wishes. Gwyn was still often cruel, emotionally and physically, to Efnisien, and disrespected Efnisien's boundaries on the regular, though he is working on it, which included two apologies. Efnisien and Dr Gary noted that Gwyn's visits to Efnisien were also bad *for Gwyn*.

Gwyn eventually learned that Efnisien has PTSD, from before he was assaulted at Hillview or by Crielle when she stabbed him, that Lludd did something to Efnisien, and that Efnisien is afraid of Gwyn, in part because Gwyn reminds Efnisien of Lludd. Gwyn admitted that he's pitied Efnisien for a long time. Gwyn noted that Efnisien was smarter than he was. Gwyn also noted that he doesn't really want to go to university because it's not really his thing. He also asked Efnisien if Efnisien wanted to see him at all, which Efnisien side-stepped.

Gwyn was with Augus at Forest during Efnisien's first visit. Augus had him fetch Kadek to deal with Efnisien, and Gwyn brought Kadek and Arden to the quiet room to join Augus, where Gwyn witnessed Augus assaulting Efnisien. When Augus insulted Efnisien again, Gwyn called Augus' name. As Efnisien left the room, Gwyn called *his* name, which Efnisien ignored. Gwyn called Efnisien's phone multiple times, which Efnisien ignored, and then showed up at Efnisien's apartment to bang on the door and otherwise get in, speaking at Efnisien (or the empty apartment) while Efnisien ignored him. Gwyn noted he'd 'known Arden for a couple of years' and was surprised that's who Gwyn's boyfriend was, and that Efnisien was a sub, that Augus shouldn't have assaulted Efnisien, and begged for Efnisien to talk to him. He later called Dr Gary to ask about Efnisien's whereabouts. After being discharged from the hospital, Efnisien called Gwyn to set up a meeting, planning not to talk to Gwyn for a number of years afterward. At the meeting, Gwyn voiced a concern that Efnisien might hurt someone, possibly because he wasn't seeing Gwyn. Efnisien replied, 'I can’t explain to you how much I just haven’t really wanted to hurt anyone in ages, because you don’t really believe me.' Gwyn brought up that Efnisien abused *him*, which Efnisien acknowledged and apologized for, and when Gwyn noted that *Efnisien* had been abused, Efnisien told him it wasn't his job to understand it, and that part of their parting was so Efnisien could be more around people who appreciated him for who he was. Gwyn noted that maybe *he* needed a new therapist to talk things out with. Efnisien also told Gwyn that Gwyn was no longer Efnisien's next of kin on his medical information, including with Dr Gary, so Dr Gary didn't have to talk to Gwyn. Gwyn noted that he'd wanted to visit Efnisien at the hospital.

## Han Yuen

Han Yuen is member of the first poetry group Efnisien joined, as well as a member of Leaves.

#### Personality

Han Yuen likes academics and not being seen.

Han Yuen was friendly towards Efnisien at Leaves, and noted that she used to be shy, as well. She's also friends with Leo.

Han Yuen used to hate reading aloud, and was really quiet and studious, which her mother didn't want her to be, as her parents had been very strict with her, as the first child born to immigrants. Han Yuen noted her mother was supportive with whatever Han Yuen chose to do.

#### Life

She 'applied for several prestigious awards, and . . . won at least one big deal competition in the past.' She has a difficult relationship with her father. She started 'writing sonnets, but they were still emotional bombs with metaphors about celestial bodies.'

She spent time with both Leo and Efnisien during the end of year Leaves party. She talked about her brother, who was hospitalized for a while, and that she was 'trying to get enough poetry together for a book', as she's 'done a couple of chapbooks now, and a publisher showed an interest.' It's something she did in her free time, and the book was about 'space telescopes and satellites and stuff' and that she required the publisher to release an audiobook simultaneously with her reading the poems. She also suggested the three of them 'all get together some time and practice doing readings'. She asked if she could have a way to contact Efnisien, and suggested Whatsapp, which he possibly deleted after talking to Nate and Janusz on it in the past, and made a chat that included herself, Leo, and Efnisien, so he could get Leo's number as well. The three of them later had a fun conversation about strange words.

## Hannah

One of the medical professionals who visited Efnisien in the hospital to check on him when he woke up. She seemed polite, and asked Efnisien questions about his status. She also has a dog.

## Hilda

Hilda is seemingly one of the owners of the Shelter, and possibly the sculptor who makes all the animal statues. Her partner is Kushanu.

## Imogen

Arden's therapist. She's helped him through a lot during the story. She has dogs.

#### Appearance

'She's a golden retriever crossed with a standard poodle'.

#### Personality

he is well-trained, but very excitable around new people, and loves attention. She helps calm Arden down.

#### Life

She was a 'gift from [Susan], as a kind of payment.' She was the first animal Efnisien was able to pet in years, and he cares for her. Her nicknames include "Bella" and "Izzy". She knows certain commands related to Schutzund, which she was very good at (in part). Arden manages an Instagram account for her, and she has a very popular Ko-Fi account that Arden said was more popular than his own. After everything that happened at Forest and with Efnisien being in the hospital, Arden noted he hasn't been keeping up with her training as much as he should.

When Arden is too overwhelmed by things, she goes to Kadek's, or possibly other places, because she gets upset. She stayed with friends while Arden and Efnisien were on vacation at the Shelter, as she's famous and people want to spend time with her, and socialize her with other dogs.

## Janusz

Janusz is a member of LAPQC, and Nate's boyfriend.

#### Personality

He is very friendly to seemingly everyone, including Efnisien.

Janusz loves Nate, and he calls Nate out when Nate goes too far.

He loves cars, and uses driving, sometimes for hours, as a way to decompress.

#### Life

Janusz and Nate live together. Janusz works as a mechanic. He also works on very fancy cars.

He missed Efnisien after Efnisien stopped attending choir practice, and Nate invited him to visit their poetry group because Janusz is better at figuring interpersonal things out, so Janusz wrote a poem so he could come visit the poetry group. He's also shopped at The Cosy Book Corner, so he knows Arden as a friendly employee. Janusz also started a Whatsapp conversation between himself, Nate, and Efnisien.

Janusz messaged Efnisien to check in on him while Efnisien was in the hospital, and Efnisien let him know that he was in the hospital, and that he'd let them all know when something changed.

Janusz performed with LAPQC at a street performance around Christmas.

## Kadek

Kadek was Arden's mentor, and the two are still incredibly close, and currently work together on their store, The Cosy Book Corner. Kadek is the protagonist of *Let it Happen*.

#### Appearance

'Kadek was about the same height as Arden', but also shorter, and seemingly older than Arden. Kadek 'had darkish-brown skin, lively black eyes, and his hair was black and wavy and shaggy, but it was still professionally cut.' When Efnisien first met him, Kadek 'wore black jeans and a white shirt and he was lean and muscular in a way that suggested he did some kind of training like Arden. His smile was broad'.

#### Personality

Kadek is bold, playful, smart, and a very good cook. 'He used to play football and cricket' and loves sports. Video games help calm him down. He also has major issues reaching out to people when he needs help, though he knows it's something he should probably change. He is very protective of the people he cares about, but often shies away from learning too much about their pasts when they involve pain, because he can't deal with the people who hurt them the way he wants to. He has issues with his parents wanting him to get married and have children. He loves the Minions and cars generally, and seems to also like Hot Wheels, as well as decorating for Christmas.

Neither Efnisien nor Arden appreciated Kadek's pushiness, assumptions, kink-shaming, and ignoring Efnisien and Arden's boundaries in regard to how they handled their own relationship. Kadek later apologized for his behavior. Arden noted that Kadek struggles with certain aspects of representation in their work beyond including models of color, as 'he doesn’t really work with disability, or fat people, or old folk', but that he's 'still growing a lot as a person.'

#### Life

After Arden brought Efnisien to Kadek's home to introduce them, Efnisien started coming on more visits with Arden to Kadek's home. Kadek was angry at Arden for not taking proper care of Efnisien after a scene, and seemingly found Arden's education of Efnisien 'lacking.' Some time after hearing Efnisien play piano, Kadek made good on the idea of asking Efnisien to perform at a play party.

Kadek lived in Japan for a time and taught English as a Second Language ("ESL"), and returned later to be 'mentored in aibunawa and semenawa.' His parents used to live in Bali, Indonesia, before they moved to where Kadek currently lives, then moved to Lombok. He is a dungeon master for a Dungeons and Dragons group. Besides the bookshop, Kadek earns money teaching rope courses, through Patreon, and investments. He's also well-known, professionally: people pay for him to travel overseas and teach classes. He also co-owns a kink club called Forest.

Kadek invited Efnisien to Forest to help Arden with a 101-class. When Augus reported to Kadek on Efnisien's history of assaulting Augus and Gwyn, Kadek was shocked, particularly when he discovered that Arden knew and brought Efnisien to Forest anyway. When Arden tried to defend Efnisien, Kadek became more hostile, particularly since Arden often reminded Kadek about the rules in the past. When Augus assaulted Efnisien, Kadek warned him, particularly given Augus' past history, and then banned Efnisien from the club and any other club Kadek co-owned. He then suspended Augus. Kadek also refused to discuss it with Arden, noting he never would have allowed Efnisien into the club if he'd known ahead of time. Arden noted that he and Kadek are still friends. Arden filled Kadek in on some of Efnisien's past history.

Kadek visited Efnisien at the hospital after Efnisien contacted Arden. Kadek brought him flowers and homemade food and noted that though he was madder at Arden, Efnisien should have checked the rules before attending Forest. Kadek also noted that he was *very* angry at Augus about Augus assaulting Efnisien. Although Kadek told Efnisien he couldn't go to local kink clubs, but could probably still go to some outside the city, Kadek thought he shouldn't, but Efnisien was still welcome at Kadek's play parties. When Efnisien insisted Kadek should hate Efnisien for the terrible things Efnisien did, Kadek noted that in the past he'd badly injured a rope model, and injured others as well. He also encouraged Efnisien to get mad at him, since it was allowed (as Kadek hadn't protected him at Forest), despite Efnisien's belief that it wasn't allowed due to Efnisien's mental health problems. When Efnisien mentioned that he'd been assaulted by two people at Forest, Kadek snapped on the new information, but backed off when he saw Efnisien didn't want to talk about it. Kadek let Arden know about the other person who'd assaulted Efnisien. Kadek also essentially had Augus banned from the city club circuit because he 'knows everyone.'

After Efnisien was discharged from the hospital, Kadek drove Efnisien to his apartment, and brought some groceries he'd bought. He was very judgmental of Efnisien's apartment, which Efnisien pushed back on, telling him to leave if he wouldn't stop. Kadek also asked about Efnisien's issues with fire, and they talked more about Efnisien's actions in the past, and his trauma. Kadek also invited Efnisien over to his place, even without Arden, if Efnisien ever wanted. After seeing Efnisien's bedroom, Kadek asked if Efnisien living like he did in a terrible apartment was penance, and when Efnisien said, 'Maybe a little', Kadek told him, 'Cut it out.'

After Kadek talked to Arden about how he'd dommed Efnisien to some extent, and Arden and Efnisien talked about it, as well, things became a bit easier between the three of them, and they spent more time together. During the party for Efnisien's 21st birthday, Kadek gave Efnisien an electronic piano.

## Kamon

Kamon was one of Efnisien's nurses at the hospital after his suicide attempt. 'She was friendly to him, and they got along well.'

## Kayla Grace

Kayla is Augus' and Gwyn's friend, and currently engaged to Gulvi.

## Kelly

Kelly is a member of LAPQC. She and Ally are married and have two kids.

## Kitson

Kitson attended Arden's 101 class at Forest while Efnisien was in attendance, and hadn't come with a partner.

#### Appearance

'He had dirty blond hair, sharp blue eyes. When he smiled, Efnisien thought his teeth looked nice, and his smile seemed friendly enough.'

#### Life

He visited Efnisien in the Quiet room, and said that Arden said it was okay if Kitson practiced rope ties on Efnisien, so Efnisien went along with it, though he was suspicious, particularly when Kitson started reminding Efnisien of himself as a predator, Crielle, and Henton. When Efnisien said to untie him, Kitson ignored and mocked him, and then dragged him around with the rope. When Efnisien safeworded, Kitson ignored it and mocked him for it. Ultimately, Augus entered the room, warning Kitson not to trust Efnisien. Kitson then fled.

## Kushanu

Kushanu is Hilda's partner and 'likes to cook.'

## Layla

Layla is a play partner and/or model of Kadek's. She also knows Arden.

#### Appearance

Although they largely looked the same, Laurie had shorter hair than Arden does, and his cheekbones were more defined than Arden's.

#### Personality

Arden said of their early relationship: 'Laurie was like…kind and enthusiastic. I guess like me, but he was quieter and more settled as well. He took all of my energy in stride, though. He’d bring me sparklers and we’d set them off together in the back garden, and he’d watch me running around in circles screaming and take photos of me. He’d come up with games to help me burn off all of my extra energy. He was the one that suggested judo to Mum. Basically, like, he had my back.' Laurie was also regularly assaulted by their father as a child, and then started assaulting Arden. When Arden told their mother, after telling their father didn't work, Laurie was sent away to Hillview. Arden cut off contact with Laurie, though Laurie sent Arden letters over the years, and tried to mend things between them twice after leaving Hillview, including buying a box of sparklers. When Arden finally read the letters, he sent Laurie a long letter in reply, which arrived in Laurie's mailbox the day Laurie succeeded in committing suicide. Laurie never read the letter, or seemingly even knew it was there. Laurie is still a difficult topic for Arden to talk about and deal with, and Arden says that Efnisien reminds him of Laurie, a little, but Efnisien is *not* a replacement for Laurie.

## Leo

Leo is a member of the first poetry group Efnisien joined, and runs it when Nate isn't around, and is also a member of Leaves.

#### Appearance

Leo is one of the younger guys in the first poetry group, and 'had dark brown skin, and large, warm[, dark brown] eyes. Efnisien thought his hair – which was big and tightly curled and dense – looked cool, but wondered if it was weird to sleep on.'

#### Personality

Leo was quite friendly, and a bit anxious about sharing his work.

He and Efnisien have grown close, and Efnisien considers him a friend. Efnisien called him 'the most encouraging person on the planet.'

Leo said that poetry group made him less shy, and Nate noted that Leo talks about his issues with his parents. Leo is also friends with Han Yuen.

#### Life

When Efnisien first showed up at the first group, Leo was the one to greet him and talk a little about how the group worked. Leo wrote a haiku about his family. He also read Efnisien's poem about the snail to the poetry group on Efnisien's behalf. He called himself 'a social media juggernaut'.

During the Leaves end of year party, Han Yuen encouraged Leo to have more confidence in his work and 'publish a chapbook next year'.

## Lija

Lija is a surgeon and the mother of Gulvi and a number of daughters, and Augus and Ash's adopted mother.

#### Appearance

When she met with Efnisien after his suicide attempt, she appeared as a 'professional looking older woman' and had 'long white hair that was plaited, and she wore a white coat like some of the doctors did.'

#### Personality

'Lija had never trusted [Efnisien] around her daughters . . . She had a razor-sharp gaze, and she always stared at Efnisien and Crielle like they weren’t worth her time. She was friendly enough . . . She had a cool way of talking.' Efnisien noted she 'reminded him of Crielle.'

#### Life

She was also previously acquainted with Crielle and Efnisien from social gatherings they'd all attended. She noted that, as a child, Efnisien was cute, but a little strange: when he was six or seven, he was 'very timid. Exceedingly polite, but nervous, and constantly looking back over [his] shoulder to check on [his] aunt. [His] hands shook, which is very odd in a child that doesn’t have a biological reason to have a tremor.' She noted that he had 'all the red flags of a child living in a difficult situation which', but she didn't give it much thought at the time. She was later the surgeon who worked on Efnisien's stomach when he was attacked by Crielle. She later heard about Efnisien's suicide attempt, and that Augus had physically attacked him, and came to visit Efnisien. She talked to him about what she saw of him as a young child and as a teenager, her anger that he hurt Augus and Gwyn, but that she still came to check on him, in part because she didn't like it when her patients ruined her work. She also noted the benefits of visiting a gastroenterologist for his kind of injury. She eventually realized how afraid he was of her, and eventually called a nurse for him before she left.

## Lily

Lily is seemingly a friend, partner, and/or model of Kadek's, and they've known each other for some years. She gave him a box of chocolates for Christmas.

## Linda

Linda is a member of the poetry group. She attends university and takes poetry classes.

## Lludd Llaw Eraint

Lludd is Efnisien's uncle, Gwyn's father, Crielle's husband, and brother-in-law to Penny and Euroswydd.

#### Personality

Efnisien noted that Lludd had an incredible amount of somewhat contained fury in him, which simmered, and which Lludd would have likely used to kill a lot more people than he did, given the chance.

Lludd was also very homophobic. Lludd was emotionally and physically abusive towards Efnisien, as well as Gwyn, since their childhoods, to the point that Efnisien has flashbacks about Lludd's abuses.

Lludd kept a stock of expensive alcohol, which Efnisien stole from just before giving the USB to Augus. Lludd also hated music and the humanities. He seemingly collected cars.

#### Life

Efnisien called him the 'family fixer.' He routinely broke furniture in the mansion, often to scare others, including Efnisien. Lludd was also very homophobic. Efnisien typically discounts his experiences with Lludd being abusive because, according to him, Lludd was worse to and only targeted Gwyn. Lludd hated Gwyn *and* Efnisien, and Crielle would play Lludd and Efnisien off against each other, sometimes leaving Efnisien alone with the far stronger Lludd. After the settlement with Gwyn, Lludd and Crielle left the country.

## Lydia

Lydia was one of the members of the ensemble. She's in a relationship with Manal. She's a soprano.

## Mackenzie ("Mack")

Mack is Dr Gary's receptionist, and has been in that job for at least two years.

#### Appearance

Efnisien described her as young and pretty.

#### Life

It's implied that Mack is either related to Dr Gary or the daughter of a friend. Although Efnisien was initially critical of her 'slow' typing speed of around 80 words per minute, over time he tried to be kinder and introduced himself more formally, though he is very afraid of upsetting her. She has responded positively to him and is quite friendly towards him.

## Manal

Manal is one of the members of the ensemble. She's in a relationship with Lydia. She's a soprano.

## Marie

Marie is either Crielle's 'secretary or a servant.' She answered the burner phone Efnisien called on Crielle's behalf.

## Mark

Mark was a model in "Pastel Shibari Dreams", which was a book that Arden helped make. Mark 'used to be a dominant, but became a submissive after his wife died, because it helped him find a quiet mental space in which he could feel cared for, and remember his wife’s care. . . . He’s working again, he has like four rescue cats that he adores, and he got into knitting through a couple of other subs that he met in the community and now he runs a knitting group.' Mark also helped Arden and Kadek with some of their YouTube videos as a model. Arden likes him as a model because he's older and male, which isn't the norm for models in their work.

## Melissa

Melissa is one of Efnisien's victims. She is a year older than him.

## Michael Henton

Henton was the psychologist who saw Efnisien for therapy at Hillview. Although he was a good doctor at one point, he started abusing patients, ending with Efnisien, which was how his activities were discovered, and he was removed from the facility. Henton lost his license to practice because of his abuses.

#### Personality

Henton had a habit of creating 'whole narratives out of Efnisien’s file alone. Efnisien never needed to say a thing.' Henton also compared Efnisien to a dog. His focus on making Efnisien think more about touching his own body was possibly a way to make Efnisien more open to what Henton did to him, and made Efnisien afraid of touching himself. Henton also convinced Efnisien he deserved to be assaulted.

#### Life

When Efnisien was taking Clonazepam, which made it difficult to impossible to resist answering Dr Gary's questions in the hospital, Henton noted Efnisien was having issues and had him stop taking it. This made Efnisien grateful to him. After Efnisien was assaulted by other residents at Hillview, Henton met him in the hospital and said that Efnisien had 'brought it on himself by goading them'. Henton also told Efnisien that Crielle's attack was 'fitting' because Efnisien was a monster, implied that no one would miss Efnisien if he died, and that Efnisien deserved worse than he got.

Efnisien is still afraid to even think about him, though he's started talking about him a little during therapy sessions with Dr Gary, and even spoke to Arden about him. Efnisien believes that Henton, at least to some extent, 'fixed' Efnisien. Efnisien and Dr Gary think Henton was the first person Efnisien trusted. He was skilled in 'functional somatic therapy', which was part of why Dr Gary wanted him at Hillview originally.

## Dr Mika Ferguson ("Mika")

Mika is 'a psychologist . . . who specialises in diverse genders and sexualities and is familiar with clients' with Efnisien's background.

Mika is the protagonist of *The Moon is Down.*

#### Appearance

At their first meeting, 'Dr Ferguson was slender and wiry, [and] he had long, wavy blue hair that was purple at the tips, and blue eyelashes, and blue glasses, and he wore a blue Hawaiian shirt, and he was definitely wearing lip gloss or something.' His 'hair looked really silky and nice.' At their second meeting, he had red hair and 'he wore a black business suit with a red tie that had shiny bright betta fish all over it. His glasses were red rimmed and chunky, and his eyelashes behind them were blue'.

#### Personality

Efnisien considered Mika to be 'genuinely curious, open and bubbly'.

#### Life

Mika did his thesis 'on the psychological health of nonbinary and genderqueer teenagers in public school systems, with specific focus on sex offenders and victims of sexual abuse.' He also wrote a second thesis and published two books. He knew Arden - professionally at least - prior to meeting Efnisien, and even attended some of Arden's workshops for educational reasons. Mika respected him a lot (though Arden was annoyed that Mika told Efnisien about Arden's YouTube account, because Efnisien wasn't ready for it).

He saw Efnisien a few times to talk about Efnisien's sexuality. Efnisien often found their meetings stressful. Mika suggested Efnisien try outdoor sessions, to escape some of the claustrophobia of Dr Gary's office. Efnisien noted his discomfort with speaking to Mika because he couldn't separate his trauma from what he meant to talk with Mika about.

## Milo

Milo is possibly a member of LAPQC and friend of Trixie's. He attended one of her previous Christmas parties and brought a bucket of strawberries.

## Mosk

Mosk runs Leaves, the more casual and less educational poetry group that meets 1-2 times a month.

#### Appearance

Mosk had bright green hair and grey eyes, and Efnisien noted that he was beautiful and 'could’ve been older than thirty, but it was hard to tell.' When Efnisien first met him, he wore 'wore a gold cuff around his wrist, jeans that looked like they’d seen better days . . . and from the back he wore vibrant green shirt with a print of deep red flowers around the hems. It looked weirdly fashionable.'

#### Personality

eo commented that Mosk loved the members of Leaves. Mosk was polite and friendly to Efnisien. Han Yuen noted Mosk and Nat get together to practice reading each other's poems, and Leo noted they're friends. Mosk noted that 'kind of [hates] people sometimes. At least in groups', and that he 'used to be way more misanthropic', but now just gets overwhelmed quickly.

#### Life

Mosk told Efnisien that there was 'no obligation to read your poetry, and we don’t run critique circles. People who do read will usually get positive feedback only. People looking for something more critique-focused can attend Nate’s group. There are definitely folks who go to both.’ During Efnisien's first meeting, there were around 20 people, and 'Mosk ran a fairly structured group, but a friendly one too.'

Mosk works as a botanist. He started 'out in agronomy for the money, then pteridology for a while, and now [is] pursuing a PhD in systems ecology.’ It was his second doctorate. He was married, and noted his husband was 'much cooler' than him.

Mosk planned 'an end-of-the-year poetry meet' for Leaves that Efnisien wanted to attend. After Nate spoke with Efnisien at the meet, Mosk checked in on him and Efnisien, and again with Efnisien after Nate left.

## Nathaniel ("Nate")

Nate is a member of LAPQC, and normally runs the first poetry group that Efnisien joined. Nate spun that group off of Leaves, 'because he wanted something more formal and educational.' He's Janusz's boyfriend.

#### Personality

Nate is blunt, caustic, and a limit pusher, and Efnisien greatly dislikes him, in part because he's allowed to be awful and face no apparent consequences for it. Nate can recognize when he's gone too far, and is quick to apologize and back off. In his own way, he is also supportive: his critical analysis helps members of the poetry group improve, and his pushing gets Efnisien to try his hand at actually writing poetry. Han Yuen noted that Nate still believes '*he* has more to learn'.

Nate once said, 'I don’t people please anymore. I’m barely pleasing at all. I don’t like doing favours for people. I hate people opening up to me. These days it’s all just…a reminder. I became a horrible person. Just like Christian.’

Nate smoked, which Jansuz hated.

Janusz said that Nate 'likes cats and Jude Law.' Anthony noted that Nate liked singing solo, and resented those who could sing as well or better than him, and would complain about LAPQC members who couldn't sing.

#### Life

Nate lives with Janusz.  Nate pushed Efnisien to read a poem aloud, and Efnisien pushed back when Nate made fun of him for not knowing what Winnie the Pooh was. Efnisien was scared that Nate would insult Efnisien's poetry, or kick him out of the poetry club. Nate invited Janusz as a sort of go-between, so that he and Efnisien could work on their relationship, and also suggested the ensemble as a middle ground. Nate once shared a poem about his relationship with Janusz and his feelings. Efnisien eventually talked to him about Efnisien being too stressed to come to poetry group, but that he still *wanted* to go, and Nate acknolwedged that it was because of *Nate*, so he suggested an alternate group, Leaves, that Nate wasn't a member of.

When Efnisien was spending some time alone to recharge at the Leaves end of year party, Nate came to sit by him.  Nate explained that he used to be kinder, more giving, and a people pleaser, and then he met Christian at choir. Christian blamed his PTSD or Nate for triggering his PTSD for all of his problems. Christian's manipulation kept Nate from practicing singing at home most of the time, reaching out for support when his mother was dying or when Nate was upset about it, and even from sleeping much in case he had a nightmare or woke Christian up. When Nate suggested Christian go to therapy, Christian blamed Nate 'for trying to fix him', and when Nate told Christian he didn't think they were 'doing well as a couple', Christian blamed him for giving up on them. Nate first confided in Bridge, who told him he 'wasn't trying hard enough for [his] partner.' So Nate believed her, and ended up self-harming, not eating or sleeping, and got sick. Janusz made Nate talk to him, and Nate later broke up with Christian, who left the choir, taking a lot of people with him who took his side. Bridge stayed, but sided with Christian. The whole experience potentially gave Nate PTSD.

Nate noted that he hates Efnisien, still, because Efnisien reminds him of Christian, and Nate worried about Arden and what Efnisien was doing to him. When Efnisien explained more about his relationship with Arden, Nate noted that Efnisien didn't owe him an explanation. Efnisien noted that Nate was apologizing to Efnisien and helped people and looked out for them, and that if Nate needed to keep checking in Efnisien's relationship with Arden, it wasn't an imposition.

When Nate expressed interest in meeting Arden someday, and Efnisien noted it was to make sure Efnisien wasn't abusing him, Efnisien pointed out that it could be hard to tell if Arden was being abused, because people are good at hiding it. Efnisien pointed out that Nate 'never actually said that Christian abused' him, but that he wouldn't mind Nate meeting Arden someday.

Nate performed with LAPQC at a street performance around Christmas.

## Paul

Paul is one of the older members of the first poetry group, and Rupert's partner. During one meeting he 'talked about boat poetry, and then shanties for a bit.'

## Penny

Penny is Euroswydd's wife, Efnisien's mother, Crielle's sister, Lludd's sister-in-law, and Gwyn's aunt.

#### Appearance

Efnisien noted that Penny looks a lot like Crielle.

#### Personality

Efnisien said his parents 'never wanted a kid'. Efnisien theorized she only had a child because she wanted to know what pregnancy was like, and possibly what infanticide or filicide was like.

Efnisien said Penny 'could be fun. And she was like, superficially nice.' Penny 'kind of treated [Efnisien] like a really entertaining puppy. Like, she’d grab [his] face and say [he] was really pretty, and that [he'd] get to fuck all the girls when [he] was older.’ She'd also 'grab [his] hair and pull on it, and that hurt a bit sometimes', like he was a stuffed animal; he also thinks the scars on his back might be from Penny. According to Efnisien, Crielle disapproved of Penny's lack of control in managing her impulse to harm, and was tired of cleaning up after her. But Penny and Crielle 'love each other a ton.'

#### Life

She and Euroswydd spend most of their lives on cruises, and abandoned their only son seemingly near his birth, leaving him in Crielle's care. Crielle once told Efnisien that Penny killed one of Crielle's favorite maids, which was possibly Chrissy. Efnisien theorized that he voiced a preference for Chrissy over Penny, which goaded Penny into murdering Chrissy. Crielle had to pay people off to protect Penny, and Crielle also said that Penny hurt people on the cruise trips, as well. Efnisien knows she's a murderer, particularly on cruise ships. Penny would also bring Efnisien gifts from their trips and say he was growing up well. Penny and Euro visited him once in the hospital after Crielle's assault, and technically left him a stipend after Efnisien left Hillview, but didn't leave Efnisien a way to access it, likely at Crielle's behest, and have not contacted him since the hospital visit, or left him a way to reach out.

Efnisien doesn't consider Penny to be his mother, other than biologically.

## Psychiatrist

Efnisien met with a psychiatrist at the hospital and talked about the effects the medications the hospital gave him were having on him. The psychiatrist suggested taking Efnisien off the drugs for the time being. The psychiatrist later revealed he'd consulted on Efnisien's case at Hillview three years prior. He also said he rollerblades, and that he's good acquaintences with Dr Gary.

## Ramesh

Ramesh was a member of LAPQC and the Tenor Leader.

## Rebecca

Rebecca was a member of LAPQC. She was the first person to greet Efnisien when he first went to a rehearsal. She's a few years younger than Efnisien, and polite.

## Ricky

Ricky is a member of Leaves. He accidentally entered the beer garden during a Leaves meeting while 'wasted, and then he started writing poetry.’ He read a poem about carpentry at Efnisien's first Leaves meeting.

## Rupert

Rupert is one of the older members of the first poetry group, and Paul's partner. He always wrote about animals. One 'of his poems had been accepted into an anthology'. He transitioned to writing vanilles.

## Sarah

Sarah was seemingly an evangelist who came to convert LAPQC, but realised 'she loved women and left her church and found a god that’d accept her for who she was', and seemingly joined LAPQC.

#### Appearance

She appeared to be in her fifties, and when she first met Efnisien, she 'was dressed in a lot of black . . . and she wore striking, kind of punk makeup, her straight black hair pulled back in a long ponytail.' Efnisien noted she needed to always be wearing 'vivid lipstick'. She appears to be younger than Frankie.

#### Personality

She's friends with Arden and Kadek. Efnisien likes Frankie and Sasha.

She noted, 'I’m old enough and I’ve lived enough of life to know that not everything is always as it seems. We’re not all pure as freshly fallen snow, young man. We weren’t all born knowing how to be a good person. Some of us had to learn it over time.’ She also pushes limits a bit and messaged Arden to do something for Efnisien's 21st birthday, even when Efnisien asked her not to.

#### Life

She's half-Croation, and has family from Dalmatia.

They attended Efnisien's first play party together, and spoke with him. ‘Sasha’s been rigging since she was about twenty, but has never liked performing in clubs'. Sasha noted that Arden had 'dropped [Efnisien] in the deep end' of their community, that 'it would be hard for any first-timer to be in a relationship with' Arden, and told Efnisien, ‘Remember to keep him in line, Efnisien. He might teach beginners, but it’s not the same as being with one.’ In the past, Frankie and Sasha lived in a nudist colony, which was anti-swinger and anti-kink. She's a naturist.

Sasha and Frankie came to visit Efnisien in the hospital. They also let him know some of the things that had happening with Arden since the incidents at Forest. Efnisien told them the rumors about him were probably true, and that Efnisien was horrible and hurt someone. He also wanted them to leave, but didn't say anything. Sasha offered him an open invitation to their house, so he could walk around if he wanted. He later took them up on their offer, and enjoyed spending time with them on the property. He talked to Sasha about dumbo octopus and talked to them both about his relationship with Arden, and making friends.

## Stephanie ("Steph") Whyte

Steph is one of Efnisien's victims from when Efnisien attended Murdock. Her brother sought out Efnisien and physically assaulted him on the street.

## Steph's brother

Steph's brother looked to be about Efnisien's age, maybe younger. He was shorter than Efnisien. He confronted Efnisien near Efnisien's apartment, and when he mentioned Steph, Efnisien baited him. Steph's brother beat him up and destroyed Efnisien's new book and used the spine to hurt Efnisien more. It seems that an older woman stopped Steph's brother at some point.

## Susan

Susan was a long-term client of Arden's. She gave Isabelle to Arden as a sort of payment. Susan works as a dog trainer and 'runs obedience and tracking meets'. She tricked Arden into coming over to her place so that a litter of puppies would 'learn to trust people in leather', and then sort of guilted him into taking Isabelle home.

## Tahlia

Tahlia was 'an eating disorder dietitian, with secondary training in social work' at the hospital Efnisien was checked into.

#### Appearance

When she first visited Efnisien, she 'held a clipboard, and wore a skirt and blouse, and heels, and he thought her red hair was nice. She seemed young, like maybe even his age, but he couldn’t tell.'

#### Personality

She was forthright and friendly, and her encouragement got Efnisien to schedule a future appointment with her.

#### Life

Dr Gary told her he was worried about some of Efnisien's behavious around eating. Her job was to be someone Efnisien 'can talk to about food or eating, or about what makes that hard sometimes, and to just help out a bit'.

## Theodore ("Teddy")

Teddy is a member of LAPQC and also runs an independent vocal ensemble that's smaller than LAPQC, alongside Anthony.

#### Appearance

When they first met in person, Teddy was 'a surprisingly staid, short man, wearing tweed and a red tie. He looked like he was in his fifties.'

#### Personality

He considered his full first name 'dour'. He appeared to be in a relationship with Anthony.

#### Life

When Efnisien reached out to LAPQC initially over the phone, Teddy was the person he spoke with. Teddy was very bright and excited about LAPQC, appeared to be a member of the choir, and had a head for the business of running a choir.

Teddy performed with LAPQC at a street performance around Christmas. Teddy told Efnisien he was always welcome at rehearsals.

## Travis

Travis is/was a friend of Frankie and Sasha's. They 'have a habit of adopting some of the lost lambs out there', and Travis was one of them. Travis 'eventually grew into the scene, made lots of friends, and moved to a rope atelier in Israel.'

#### Appearance

She had 'really intensely huge blonde hair' and blue eyes.

#### Personality

She gets very into the music while playing. She loves pianos. She likes Efnisien, but she didn't ask for his consent before hugging him, which terrified him, and she kept calling him nicknames without asking first.

#### Life

According to Teddy, she was very good. Efnisien has acknowledged, to himself, that he is better than Trixie at the piano. Trixie is also part of the ensemble. Prior to the story, she was married to a husband, with children, and worked as an accountant. She also did a doctorate in her 40s.

Trixie performed with LAPQC at a street performance around Christmas. She also invited Efnisien to her Christmas party.

She made fruit juice that she brought to rehearsals.

## Vicki

Vicki was one of the nurses who saw Efnisien in the hospital.

#### Life

She was possibly the one who comforted him and/or later held his hand when he was first checked in. When Efnisien changed wards, she treated him again, and comforted him while talking about Warner Bros., cartoons and animals. She talked to him again after Lija's visit, cheering him up a little. She visited him again after Frankie and Sasha's visit, and brought him new meds to help with his stomach problems. She also changed his pillow for a fresh one and talked with him about the various stomach issues he'd been having, and also about what had stressed him, which led to talking about Arden.

## References

1. ↑ 1.0 1.1 1.2 1.3 1.4 1.5 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 14 February 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/92592958. Chapter 104: Cruise Control.
2. ↑ 2.00 2.01 2.02 2.03 2.04 2.05 2.06 2.07 2.08 2.09 2.10 2.11 2.12 2.13 2.14 2.15 2.16 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 30 September 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/65207152. Chapter 21: Voice.
3. ↑ 3.0 3.1 3.2 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 7 August 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/62581294. Chapter 8: Uncosy.
4. ↑ 4.0 4.1 4.2 4.3 4.4 4.5 4.6 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 20 July 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/61602112. Chapter 2: Green.
5. ↑ 5.00 5.01 5.02 5.03 5.04 5.05 5.06 5.07 5.08 5.09 5.10 5.11 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 25 August 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/63499606. Chapter 15: Aversions.
6. ↑ 6.0 6.1 6.2 6.3 6.4 6.5 6.6 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 27 November 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/67899055. Chapter 35: Drama Triangle.
7. ↑ 7.0 7.1 7.2 7.3 7.4 7.5 7.6 7.7 7.8 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 24 April 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/76238720. Chapter 60: Confused.
8. ↑ 8.00 8.01 8.02 8.03 8.04 8.05 8.06 8.07 8.08 8.09 8.10 8.11 8.12 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 21 April 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/96276916. Chapter 121: Chrissy.
9. ↑ 9.00 9.01 9.02 9.03 9.04 9.05 9.06 9.07 9.08 9.09 9.10 9.11 9.12 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 13 June 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/99168567. Chapter 130: Adorabilis.
10. ↑ 10.0 10.1 10.2 10.3 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 30 June 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/100126260. Chapter 132: Light.
11. ↑ 11.0 11.1 11.2 11.3 11.4 11.5 11.6 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 7 July 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/100531161. Chapter 134: Friends.
12. ↑ 12.00 12.01 12.02 12.03 12.04 12.05 12.06 12.07 12.08 12.09 12.10 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 16 August 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/63036727. Chapter 11: Waves.
13. ↑ 13.0 13.1 13.2 13.3 13.4 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 27 December 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/69488658. Chapter 41: Lludd.
14. ↑ 14.0 14.1 14.2 14.3 14.4 14.5 14.6 14.7 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 22 November 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/67713068. Chapter 33: Snail.
15. ↑ 15.0 15.1 15.2 15.3 15.4 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 6 December 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/68361811. Chapter 36: Forest.
16. ↑ 16.00 16.01 16.02 16.03 16.04 16.05 16.06 16.07 16.08 16.09 16.10 16.11 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 20 September 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/64753702. Chapter 20: Daring.
17. ↑ 17.0 17.1 17.2 17.3 17.4 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 26 October 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/66463360. Chapter 27: Hypervigilance.
18. ↑ 18.00 18.01 18.02 18.03 18.04 18.05 18.06 18.07 18.08 18.09 18.10 18.11 18.12 18.13 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 18 March 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/74189430. Chapter 53: Words.
19. ↑ 19.00 19.01 19.02 19.03 19.04 19.05 19.06 19.07 19.08 19.09 19.10 19.11 19.12 19.13 19.14 19.15 19.16 19.17 19.18 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 19 July 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/81076729. Chapter 75: Middle Ground.
20. ↑ 20.0 20.1 20.2 20.3 20.4 20.5 20.6 20.7 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 26 July 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/101668572. Chapter 137: Date.
21. ↑ 21.0 21.1 21.2 21.3 21.4 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 7 September 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/64145071. Chapter 18: Cards.
22. ↑ 22.0 22.1 22.2 22.3 22.4 22.5 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 8 August 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/62631142. Chapter 9: Nine.
23. ↑ 23.0 23.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 8 November 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/67113241. Chapter 30: Parameters.
24. ↑ 24.00 24.01 24.02 24.03 24.04 24.05 24.06 24.07 24.08 24.09 24.10 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 26 July 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/61936480. Chapter 6: Crash.
25. ↑ 25.0 25.1 25.2 25.3 25.4 25.5 25.6 25.7 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 17 December 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/68924475. Chapter 39: Post-Mortem.
26. ↑ 26.00 26.01 26.02 26.03 26.04 26.05 26.06 26.07 26.08 26.09 26.10 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 28 August 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/63645757. Chapter 16: Isabelle.
27. ↑ 27.0 27.1 27.2 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 6 January 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/chapters/90352912. Chapter 98: Preliminary.
28. ↑ 28.00 28.01 28.02 28.03 28.04 28.05 28.06 28.07 28.08 28.09 28.10 28.11 28.12 28.13 28.14 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 23 July 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/61765810. Chapter 4: Gwyn.
29. ↑ 29.0 29.1 29.2 29.3 29.4 29.5 29.6 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 26 July 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/61925272. Chapter 5: Arden.
30. ↑ 30.0 30.1 30.2 30.3 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 7 April 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/75299178. Chapter 57: Sleepover.
31. ↑ 31.0 31.1 31.2 31.3 31.4 31.5 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 13 November 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/67359151. Chapter 31: Culinary.
32. ↑ 32.0 32.1 32.2 32.3 32.4 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 28 November 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/chapters/88187512. Chapter 93: Nature.
33. ↑ 33.0 33.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 28 January 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/71283174. Chapter 45: Maturity.
34. ↑ 34.0 34.1 34.2 34.3 34.4 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 30 March 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/74843448. Chapter 55: Calming.
35. ↑ 35.0 35.1 35.2 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 11 February 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/99058941. Chapter 129: Relief.
36. ↑ 36.0 36.1 36.2 36.3 36.4 36.5 36.6 36.7 36.8 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 29 December 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/chapters/89864170. Chapter 97: Innocence.
37. ↑ 37.0 37.1 37.2 37.3 37.4 37.5 37.6 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 31 January 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/chapters/91777384. Chapter 101: Displaced.
38. ↑ 38.0 38.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 2 November 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/86883991. Chapter 89: Comfort Zones.
39. ↑ 39.0 39.1 39.2 39.3 39.4 39.5 39.6 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 25 Januar 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/chapters/91432594. Chapter 100: Outside.
40. ↑ 40.0 40.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 5 April 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/75177210. Chapter 56: Empathy.
41. ↑ 41.0 41.1 41.2 41.3 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 18 August 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/63143104. Chapter 12: Sparklers.
42. ↑ 42.0 42.1 42.2 42.3 42.4 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 15 February 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/92666083. Chapter 105: Blue.
43. ↑ 43.00 43.01 43.02 43.03 43.04 43.05 43.06 43.07 43.08 43.09 43.10 43.11 43.12 43.13 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 16 February 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/chapters/92717974. Chapter 106: Augus.
44. ↑ 44.0 44.1 44.2 44.3 44.4 44.5 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 17 February 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/chapters/92774290. Chapter 107: Family.
45. ↑ 45.0 45.1 45.2 45.3 45.4 45.5 45.6 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 4 March 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/93621871. Chapter 112: Shrapnel.
46. ↑ 46.0 46.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 10 March 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/93963523. Chapter 113: Vines.
47. ↑ 47.0 47.1 47.2 47.3 47.4 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 24 March 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/94736599. Chapter 115: Confession.
48. ↑ 48.0 48.1 48.2 48.3 48.4 48.5 48.6 48.7 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 28 March 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/94951414. Chapter 116: Parallel.
49. ↑ 49.0 49.1 49.2 49.3 49.4 49.5 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 4 April 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/95335414. Chapter 118: All In.
50. ↑ 50.0 50.1 50.2 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 12 April 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/95780836. Chapter 119: Birthday.
51. ↑ 51.0 51.1 51.2 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." Spoils. Archive of Our Own, 27 April 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/96597699. Chapter 122: Cousins.
52. ↑ 52.0 52.1 52.2 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 4 May 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/96977238. Chapter 123: Care.
53. ↑ 53.0 53.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 16 May 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/92351791. Chapter 125: Turnabout.
54. ↑ 54.0 54.1 54.2 54.3 54.4 54.5 54.6 54.7 54.8 54.9 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 25 May 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/98117013. Chapter 127: University.
55. ↑ 55.0 55.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 4 July 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/100356846. Chapter 133: No Pressure.
56. ↑ 56.0 56.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 8 August 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/102457917. Chapter 139: Hand-Me-Downs.
57. ↑ 57.0 57.1 57.2 57.3 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 13 August 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/102751947. Chapter 140: Farewell.
58. ↑ 58.0 58.1 58.2 58.3 58.4 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 14 May 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/77349842. Chapter 64: Self Hate.
59. ↑ 59.0 59.1 59.2 59.3 59.4 59.5 59.6 59.7 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 9 October 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/65681287. Chapter 23: Justice.
60. ↑ 60.0 60.1 60.2 60.3 60.4 60.5 60.6 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 23 August 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/63389401. Chapter 14: Patterns.
61. ↑ 61.00 61.01 61.02 61.03 61.04 61.05 61.06 61.07 61.08 61.09 61.10 61.11 61.12 61.13 61.14 61.15 61.16 61.17 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 16 January 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/90909331. Chapter 99: Play Party.
62. ↑ 62.0 62.1 62.2 62.3 62.4 62.5 62.6 62.7 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 10 February 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/72044451. Chapter 47: Interrogation.
63. ↑ 63.00 63.01 63.02 63.03 63.04 63.05 63.06 63.07 63.08 63.09 63.10 63.11 63.12 63.13 63.14 63.15 63.16 63.17 63.18 63.19 63.20 63.21 63.22 63.23 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 11 July 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/100762035. Chapter 135: Nate.
64. ↑ not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 8 December 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/68467505. Chapter 37: Sunday.
65. ↑ 65.0 65.1 65.2 65.3 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 18 February 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/72578226. Chapter 48: Sadness.
66. ↑ 66.0 66.1 66.2 66.3 66.4 66.5 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 8 October 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/65629096. Chapter 22: Karma.
67. ↑ 67.0 67.1 67.2 67.3 67.4 *Falling Falling Stars*, Chapter 59: Object. Accessed 08 July 2021.
68. ↑ 68.0 68.1 68.2 68.3 68.4 68.5 68.6 68.7 68.8 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 25 February 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/93235156. Chapter 111: Cumulonimbus.
69. ↑ 69.00 69.01 69.02 69.03 69.04 69.05 69.06 69.07 69.08 69.09 69.10 69.11 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 14 September 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/64478701. Chapter 19: Illogical.
70. ↑ 70.0 70.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 1 August 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/81799537. Chapter 76: Roadblock.
71. ↑ 71.0 71.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 23 December 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/69258186. Chapter 40: Bigger.
72. ↑ 72.0 72.1 72.2 72.3 72.4 72.5 72.6 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 2 September 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/63897706. Chapter 17: Wants.
73. ↑ 73.0 73.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 12 July 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/80684689. Chapter 74: Brain Dentist.
74. ↑ 74.00 74.01 74.02 74.03 74.04 74.05 74.06 74.07 74.08 74.09 74.10 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 20 July 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/61598329. Chapter 1: Forty Five.
75. ↑ 75.0 75.1 75.2 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 12 November 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/87382570. Chapter 91: Spirals.
76. ↑ 76.0 76.1 76.2 76.3 76.4 76.5 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 28 November 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/chapters/89392543. Chapter 96: Quick Fix.
77. ↑ 77.0 77.1 77.2 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 5 November 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/87032071. Chapter 90: Pathways.
78. ↑ 78.0 78.1 78.2 78.3 78.4 78.5 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 18 November 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/chapters/87700384. Chapter 92: Suggestion.
79. ↑ 79.0 79.1 79.2 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 20 October 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/66225229. Chapter 25: Hard Place.
80. ↑ 80.00 80.01 80.02 80.03 80.04 80.05 80.06 80.07 80.08 80.09 80.10 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 10 December 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/chapters/88809895. Chapter 94: Leopard.
81. ↑ 81.0 81.1 81.2 81.3 81.4 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 9 September 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/83971459. Chapter 82: Connection.
82. ↑ 82.0 82.1 82.2 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 3 August 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/62374153. Chapter 7: Last Kiss.
83. ↑ not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 16 November 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/67495559. Chapter 32: Princess.
84. ↑ 84.0 84.1 84.2 84.3 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 12 December 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/68664450. Chapter 38: Drugged.
85. ↑ not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 28 September 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/84943063. Chapter 84: Inside.
86. ↑ 86.0 86.1 86.2 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 28 June 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/79895224. Chapter 72: Disclosure.
87. ↑ 87.00 87.01 87.02 87.03 87.04 87.05 87.06 87.07 87.08 87.09 87.10 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 23 August 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/83049817. Chapter 79: Hermes.
88. ↑ 88.0 88.1 88.2 88.3 88.4 88.5 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 27 June 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/99957591. Chapter 131: Sheep.
89. ↑ 89.0 89.1 89.2 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 22 October 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/66298762. Chapter 26: Huge.
90. ↑ 90.0 90.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 7 March 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/73587480. Chapter 51: Velvet.
91. ↑ 91.0 91.1 91.2 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 7 September 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/83868190. Chapter 81: Pastel Playroom.
92. ↑ 92.0 92.1 92.2 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 15 March 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/74024760. Chapter 52: Tummy.
93. ↑ not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 19 August 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/82827835. Chapter 78: Massage.
94. ↑ 94.0 94.1 94.2 94.3 94.4 94.5 94.6 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 8 May 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/77021507. Chapter 63: Awake.
95. ↑ not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 21 August 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/63284566. Chapter 13: Landmark.
96. ↑ 96.0 96.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 22 July 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/61711762. Chapter 3: Threshold.
97. ↑ 97.0 97.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 3 March 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/73316571. Chapter 50: Remorse.
98. ↑ not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 15 December 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/chapters/89074438. Chapter 95: Intrusions.
99. ↑ 99.0 99.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 15 June 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/79153816. Chapter 70: Selfish.
100. ↑ 100.0 100.1 100.2 100.3 100.4 100.5 100.6 100.7 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 26 January 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/71175363. Chapter 44: Liar.
101. ↑ not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 4 February 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/chapters/91998127. Chapter 102: Hillview.
102. ↑ 102.0 102.1 102.2 102.3 102.4 102.5 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 31 October 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/66708592. Chapter 28: Expectations.
103. ↑ 103.0 103.1 103.2 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 18 February 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/chapters/92826280. Chapter 108: Bridge II.
104. ↑ 104.0 104.1 104.2 104.3 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 19 February 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/chapters/92883214. Chapter 109: Dr Gary.
105. ↑ 105.00 105.01 105.02 105.03 105.04 105.05 105.06 105.07 105.08 105.09 105.10 105.11 105.12 105.13 105.14 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 23 February 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/93131107. Chapter 110: Cry Baby.
106. ↑ 106.0 106.1 106.2 106.3 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 31 March 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/95108446. Chapter 117: Clarifying.
107. ↑ not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 19 May 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/97781811. Chapter 126: Shame.
108. ↑ 108.0 108.1 108.2 108.3 108.4 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 17 July 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/101113647. Chapter 136: Window.
109. ↑ 109.0 109.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 28 April 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/76463093. Chapter 61: Comparison.
110. ↑ not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 19 May 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/77631860. Chapter 65: Imperfect.
111. ↑ 111.0 111.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 23 May 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/77853479. Chapter 66: Awkward.
112. ↑ 112.0 112.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 8 July 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/80455861. Chapter 73: Gently.
113. ↑ 113.00 113.01 113.02 113.03 113.04 113.05 113.06 113.07 113.08 113.09 113.10 113.11 113.12 113.13 113.14 113.15 113.16 113.17 113.18 113.19 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 10 February 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/92351791. Chapter 103: Leaves.
114. ↑ 114.0 114.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 13 December 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/85798150. Chapter 87: Vanishing.
115. ↑ 115.0 115.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 27 July 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/101728176. Chapter 138: Surprises.
116. ↑ 116.0 116.1 116.2 116.3 116.4 116.5 116.6 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 19 September 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/84482077. Chapter 83: Blessings.
117. ↑ not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 15 October 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/65971813. Chapter 24: Onward.
118. ↑ not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 5 June 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/78595231. Chapter 69: Nice.
119. ↑ 119.0 119.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 16 March 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/chapters/94296889. Chapter 114: Kadek.
120. ↑ 120.0 120.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 14 April 2022. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/95888071. Chapter 120: Discharged.
121. ↑ not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 25 November 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/67821004. Chapter 34: Misunderstood.
122. ↑ 122.0 122.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 2 November 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/66823858. Chapter 29: Normal.
123. ↑ not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 20 June 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/79427101. Chapter 71: Alexithymia.
124. ↑ 124.0 124.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 12 April 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/75580040. Chapter 58: Talk.
125. ↑ not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 5 May 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/76871132. Chapter 62: Cherished.
126. ↑ 126.0 126.1 not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 31 May 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/78312629. Chapter 68: Sparklers II.
127. ↑ not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 20 October 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/86170852. Chapter 88: Anger.
128. ↑ not\_poignant. "Falling Falling Stars." *Spoils. Archive of Our Own,* 10 October 2021. https://archiveofourown.org/works/25401025/chapters/85619353. Chapter 86: Abandoned.