Poe

* Phone Fling
* Official/Human
* Animal
* Hybrid

Poe is a college student from the Phone Update, who somehow manages to contact you while he is attempting to make notes on his phone. He is unlocked when you reach the Friendzone with Garret.

Poe was chosen as the winner of Vote-a-Fling Season 1 and is the first Phone Fling guy to be turned into a fully Date-able guy. To unlock him as a full guy, you have to complete all 3 of his conversations with you and get 14 stamps on LTE event or purchasing the Poe Bundle. He is the fifteen guy in the game's main tab, but he is not part of the main story and you do not need to unlock any other guys to obtain him.

You first meet Poe in person after he is transformed into a magpie. While walking through the woods, you find a stump with murky leaf water, and when you're about to take a sip, he stops you.

## Personality

Poe's update describes him as a little dark, a little damaged, and a little moody, a mixture of pretentious and conscientious.

## Phone Fling Messages

Note that pauses under 1 minute long are not indicated. Where the progress column says (A) or (B), these are your left and right options for how to respond.

### SFW Version

Poe believes he's making notes on his phone and getting responses from Sirina. How long will it take him to notice he's actually texting you?

### Uncut Version

The NSFW track diverges from the SFW track right after the first picture, but a large portion of the conversation after remains the same. All three pictures are different between versions.

## Dialogue List

### **First Meeting**

1. You're enjoying a stroll through the woods when you find a hollow stump filled with murky leaf water. It looks a lot like free soup, actually, and you're pretty hungry...
2. Just as you're about to take a sip, a magpie flies into the side of your head, shrieking, "**Don't drink the haunted tree water! You'll be so, SO cursed!**"
3. Wait a minute, that's Poe! And it looks like he's speaking from experience. At least this explains why he never texted you back...

### **Adversary**

* Look away! Avert your eyes, I beg of you! This is so. Dang. Embarrassing. I'm...I'm a MAGPIE? How stupid is that!?

#### Talk

* Quoth the magpie... Ugh, never mind.
* Can't talk right now. Too busy wallowing in self-pity.
* How could this happen to me... I made a mistake... I don't know the words... I just know this sucks.
* I'm glad you found me. I'd just like to apologize in advance for any "fowl" language that comes out of my mouth. Um, beak. Aha... Frick, I was trying to be funny, but this is just depressing.
* I don't know why I transformed into a magpie. I don't even like pie! Okay, blackberry pie is pretty good, but that's it. I don't like any other pie! I know I'm not making sense, just... Let me be upset. Ugh.

#### Date

* [Dinner] It's not the first time someone's told me I eat like a bird. Usually it's a simile, but I guess this time it was just a factual observation.
* [Boat Ride] Wow, an adorable pink flamingo boat. That's not at all ostentatious, I wonder why nobody wants to ride around in an ostrich? Oh riiiight, it's because people prefer birds that are perky, glamorous, and widely celebrated in the media...
* [Coaster] I wasn't screaming. I was imitating the screams of everyone else on the ride. Honestly, magpies are excellent mimics. Look it up!
* [Carnival] So it turns out carnivals are kind of great when you're a bird. There was so much free food on the ground! And did you see those people's faces when I pretended to be part of the spooky ride? Hahaha!

#### Poke

* \*KRACAAWWW\* Dust and ashes, did that sound come out of me?

#### Upgrade to Acquaintance

1. THERE IS A BIRD SKELETON INSIDE OF ME.
2. Sorry. I keep forgetting, and then suddenly remembering, and it freaks me out every time.

### **Acquaintance**

* Why is a raven like a writing desk? Hmm. Well, I might know the answer to that... IF I WAS A RAVEN!

#### Talk

* \*Panting\* Oh man. I saw something really shiny just now, but when I went up to grab it I saw my reflection and scared the crap out of myself! Err - by the way, if you find a weird splotch on your car, it... Wasn't me.
* Oh how I miss you, my darling platform boots. I miss your towering height, the music made by your buckles and chains... Wait a sec. I just had a great idea for a business. Ready? Shoes for birds. It's too dumb to fail!
* I flew face-first into a window today. Explain to me why society needs so many gigantic, obnoxiously clean windows everywhere? There's more to life than a streak-free shine, people!
* All you ever hear is "quoth the raven" this and "quoth the raven" that. Well, did anyone ever think to ask the other corvids what they had to say? No!
* I sure am craving a nice cup of dark-roast coffee... Wait, how can I drink coffee? I don't have any lips! Okay, you can stop laughing now. This is a serious problem.

#### Upgrade to Frenemy

1. You look concerned. Is this more than you bargained for?
2. I get it, and it's cool if you can't really help - I know how to keep my expectations low.
3. [With 'Friend' picture] While strolling through the brightly-lit park, Poe gives a heavy sigh. **"WelI, I guess it's less likely we'll encounter any cursed trees in a place like this. You must be one of those 'good influences' my mom is always on about. At least she'll be glad we're friends."**

### **Frenemy**

* Oh hey. I was just lamenting over my new feet, and the fact that they no longer fit into shoes. Sigh. Well, at least I can perch with these. Imagine being a flightless bird, like a rooster or something? That'd be SO sad.

#### Gift

* Thanks. I'm not usually too materialistic, but this actually cheered me up a tad.

#### Upgrade to Friendzone

1. Well, at least one good thing to come out of this is that we got to meet in person. Wait, can I still say "in-person" if I'm a bird? Eh, who cares. Friends?
2. Cool. So as a friend, would you mind helping me paint these talons? I just really miss my black nail polish...

### **Friendzone**

* I brought this on myself. I should have known the ominous fog and creepy silence were portents of something horrible to come. Not to mention the "Free Tree Water" sign. Ugh - NOTHING in life is free.

#### Talk

* What do you wanna do today? I was thinking I could hang out in your backpack making snarky comments and throwing eggs at all the people we dislike.
* My nickname in high school was "Poe-ser". Like poser, but with my name in it. Anyway, all my bullies work at the mall now, and I'm a freaking magpie. Joke's on them, right? Riiiight?
* I made you a nest. For some reason. I know it's weird. I don't know why I did it. I'm sorry I even told you at this point. But if you do happen to want it, it's just over there. In a tree.
* Life is a tragicomedy. The glass isn't half-empty, it's broken. And there's milk spilling everywhere. And that's a valid reason to cry because milk is expensive. Also, did you know cows have best friends?
* What if I'm stuck like this forever? Will my human memories fade as the bird-brain takes me over? Actually, that might make a good short story. Grab a pen and scribe for me, will you?
* I wanna apologize for being so... Melodramatic. Earlier. Turns out being a magpie isn't all that different from being a raven. And anyway, there's something to be said for the lack of "celebrity". Aren't all the best artists underappreciated?

#### Upgrade to Awkward Besties

1. You want us to kiss now? I dunno, this feels like it has the same problem the coffee-drinking thing had. No lips, remember?
2. All right, well... I'm trusting you.
3. [With 'Kiss' picture] **"A kiss, a kiss, to cure what's amiss..."** You lean in and give Poe a gentle peck on the tip of his beak. A ghostly glimmer, bubbles that shimmer, and the ancient curse is almost entirely shattered!

### **Awkward Besties**

* Behold! The curse is... Mostly broken. Well, my mind and soul are mostly broken too, so that's cool I guess.

#### Talk

* The scariest monsters are the ones that lurk within our souls. My ol' pal Edgar said that. Smart man. So anyway, here's a list of stuff we'll need for the DIY exorcism I've been planning.
* Wanna wander around aimlessly with me? We can talk about all the bad decisions we've made, or the terrible secrets we keep... Y'know, whatever gets us questioning each other's moral compasses.
* You're not so bad, you know. I mean, you're weird and your life seems a bit "bats in the belfry", but I dig it. It's like every day is Halloween.
* There sure are a lot of weirdos around here. That's cool though. I myself am strange and unusual.
* Was just thinkin' I might head to a poetry slam later. It's an underground thing, pretty low-key. You can come if you want. But remember, if you like something, the accepted practice is to snap your fingers. Unless you can't, in which case... Just do what I do and pretend like nothing impresses you ever.
* I had one of my weird night terrors again. This time it was a giant marshmallow trying to eat me. And... I kind of liked it. What do you think it means?
* I hate when people are all, "Does this shade of black match this other shade of black?" Like, black is literally the absence of light. If you're THAT worried about it, just close your eyes! Tada, nothing changes!
* One of my professors absolutely INSISTS on mispronouncing "Bildungsroman". It used to drive me crazy, but learning to let things go has been a real theme in my own personal coming-of-age experience.

#### Date

* [Dinner] Hey. What does a vegan emo eat? Melancholy flower. Melon...cauliflower. Yeah, I told you I was a lost cause.
* [Boat Ride] That was... an afternoon. Now, imagine if we did the same thing, but at night. And if the cutesie boat was a creaky raft instead, and we were being ferried by a mysterious cloaked figure. Now that would be something to write about!
* [Rollercoaster] That drop was intense. I was straight up mentally preparing for death's embrace. But the actual odds are about 1 in 750 million, so we'd have to go on that date like... A lot more times. I think. Is that how statistics work?
* [Haunted House] I'm going to tell you this right now. I would give anything - ANYTHING - to live in a haunted house. When can we go back?

#### Poke

* That feels strange. But nice. Like the mournful caress of a ghost. Reminds me of this time I was using my spirit board and I felt these unseen hands and... Well, you know how one thing leads to another. We ended up making pottery!

#### Upgrade to Crush

1. How's that rhyme go? One for sorrow, two for joy... I mean, it checks out. I was kind of a wreck on my own, but since we've been hanging out, I guess I feel pretty joyful.
2. Huh. Jooooyyyfull. That word tastes weird in my mouth hole.

### **Crush**

* Poe is me. Woe is me. Here's line three. Of this crappy poem.

#### Gift

* Ah! I think my heart just grew three sizes. Yep, that lil measuring device is officially broken.

#### Upgrade to Sweetheart

1. Ugh. I keep getting these weird, intense cravings for... Worms? I think it's worms. Yeah. You wanna pick some up and share?
2. What? I'm talking about gummy worms - duh! I'm gross but I'm not that gross. Are we gonna walk to the corner store, or what?

### **Sweetheart**

* Misery loves company. That must be why I get a little flutter of excitement whenever I see you.

#### Upgrade to Boyfriend

1. Nobody has ever understood me. But... I'm starting to feel like you might.
2. I just hope the real me doesn't scare you away.

### **Boyfriend**

* You are a shining beacon of love and altruism. I hate how much I don't hate it.

#### Talk

* I'm really good at chess. Like, really good. So when the time comes, I plan on challenging the grim reaper to a game of blackjack.
* I'm craving a PB & J, but I don't have any peanut butter. This is like the worst thing that's ever happened in the history of terrible things, and I wish I'd never been born. I'll be in my room, sulking for a minimum of three hours. Farewell.
* The moon. Alone in a swathe of darkness, silvery cold, so beautiful and strangely sad... Is it just me, or does it look a bit like a marshmallow puff tonight?
* Soo... Wanna go make out in an old cemetery or something?
* Yeah, I know sleeping too little has a negative effect on my well-being. What, are you gonna start, like, I dunno... Reading to me in that calming voice of yours in an effort to help me drift off into a healthy REM cycle...? I mean, it's not like I could stop you, even if I wanted to...

#### Gift

* Where is the value in a gift? Is it in the essence of the object itself? In what it cost? Or is it the thought that counts? If such a thing as a "thought" can have any inherent value at all... Huh, I'll probably be up all night contemplating this.

#### Poke

* Ahaha, how ominous. I wonder what your intentions are?

#### Upgrade to Lover

1. Oh look, it's my favorite dream. Hmm? You're really here this time? Oh, that's so great...
2. \*Yawn\* Sorry if I seem a bit slow. I'm probably sleep deprived from staying up all night thinking about you.
3. [With 'Transformation' picture] Poe gazes longingly into your eyes, twining his fingers in yours. **"Not kissing you is torment,"** he murmurs, leaning closer. As his mouth meets yours, a magical explosion occurs! The great literary tradition of True Love's Kiss has been upheld, and the curse is broken.
4. [With 'Lover' Picture] **"I finally understand why so many poems are about love. I think every poem I write for the rest of my life might be about you."** *Love, Poe*

2. You strip yourselves bare for each other, hands and mouths exploring, no longer ignoring that wildflower of desire within. You're skin-on-skin, limbs are linked, pleasure builds, you're on the brink, and then - like you've only ever read about in smutty books - the two of you orgasm in unison.
3. In the aftermath, Poe falls back exhausted. He never takes his eyes off you. **"How can I exist in this world, now that I know such otherworldly pleasure? Such disturbing, indescribable pleasure... You've ruined me."** As he speaks, he idly toys with his piercing's. It's an invitation for more that you're happy to accept.

### **Lover**

* Let's talk. All night long. In the darkness, in each other's arms, in defiance of societal norms. Life begins at sundown, and we can sleep when we're dead.

#### Date

* [Masquerade] The danse macabre unites us all. But tonight, it's you and I who'll be as one.
* [All the rest are same as Boyfriend]

#### Upgrade to Max Lover

1. I didn't know it was possible to feel so much. And that's saying something.
2. Only this time, instead of sorrow, I'm drowning in delight...

### **Max Lover**

* The sparkling still taunts me. Only now, it's the sparkling of your eyes...
* Shall I compare thee to a summer's day? No, but to the longest winter's night - The only thing that provides me a sense of belonging.
* Sometimes I wish I was still a bird, if only so I could fly up into the sky and bring you back a star...
* You're my everything. And if we get to grow into cute old people together, I'll die happy. But if you decide to leave me, then I'll die of heartbreak and become the tragic literary-esque figure I always dreamed of being. So either way, I'm cool with it.
* I've never been afraid to die. But because of you, I'm no longer afraid to keep living.
* **(Naked)** Oh, hey. I'm just hanging out, trying to catch a deathly chill.
* **(Naked)** Yep. I've got piercings now. You're welcome.
* **(Naked)** I like to do my thinking in the nude. But I'm sure that comes as no surprise to you.

#### Talk

* I hear there's a storm in the forecast. I was thinking we could go for a late-night drive through the countryside... Maybe we'll run out of gas and have to go spend the night in a creepy old castle on a hill or something.
* I hope I get to meet my Doppelganger someday. They say it's a bad omen and stuff, but I mean how cool would that be?
* I would fight an eldritch abomination for you. I'd probably lose. But then I'd haunt you forever because I love you so much.
* It's official. The road I walk isn't lonely anymore.
* Should I get a haircut? I've heard good things about that barber shop on Fleet Street.
* I'm so goth I got kicked out of Hawt Subject for bringing down the vibe.
* I adore you. And it's not just a phase. Gawd.
* I still can't believe I transformed myself into a magpie. That was super Kafkaesque. But then you saved me, and that was more like a rom com. Not sure how I feel about that, but either way... Thanks.
* Sorry for staring. You're just so beautiful... Like a marble sculpture, or my favorite word, or rain on the sea... Don't roll your eyes, you knew I was into poetry.
* You rule my roost. What? Not every declaration of adoration needs to be so completely verbose and grandiloquent. Lawl.
* I'm thinking about getting a heart tattoo with your name on it. But like, an anatomical heart. Just for the irony. Because iron is an important component of blood, and blood is an important component of you.
* My favorite color is checkerboard. Ha, you thought it was going to be something else, didn't you?
* Turns out that whole thing about magpies being thieves and liking shiny stuff is a myth. So... There goes my excuse, I guess. I'll have to go back to buying my trinkets and baubles online like a respectable person. Ugh.
* **(Naked)** So where do you think I should put my next tattoo? I'm thinking either my forearm, my chest, or my left buttock. Any preference?
* **(Naked)** I ache to be defiled, my beautiful moonchild, so elegant and wild, I saw you and I smiled... Oh, hey. I just brainstorming out loud.
* **(Naked)** Skyclad is the best clad.
* **(Naked)** Are you an abyss? Because I'd love it if you swallowed me whole right now.
* **(Naked)** I just finished reading this totally unhinged novel filled with monastic debauchery, cosmic horror, and the most depraved characters imaginable. So yeah, to say it made me horny is an understatement.
* **(Naked)** Life is hard. And so am I.
* **(Naked)** Like a good poem, there's more to me than meets the eye. So go ahead. Study me. What's your interpretation?
* **(Naked)** Remember when I said I didn't have a lot of romantic experience? Yeah, so that includes... This. Would you enlightenment me?
* **(Naked)** This is comfy. Unlike participating in mainstream society, which is a constant struggle.

#### Gift

* You really get me. Like no one else ever could. Thank you - I really, really love it.
* Stop spoiling me. You're making it hard to feel sorry for myself.
* You really didn't have to go to all this trouble. Next time, just give me a copy of your favorite book - with your most-loved passages underlined, and your musings written in the margins.
* Time is the only thing we can ever own... And it's the only thing l'll ever need from you.
* **[Boxers]** What do you think? Am I an adorable little ray of pitch black or what?
* **[Birthday Suit]** I hope to leave this world the same way I came into it. Nude and screaming
* **[Spooky Outfit]** I decided to dress up as a mime. It's perfect - I'm so pale I don't even need to buy white face paint, and if we go to a party, I have the perfect excuse not to talk to anyone!
* **[Butler Outfit]** I am going to pay so much attention to you. Probably too much. So this is just like every other day, haha.
* **[Masquerade Outfit]** Wearing a mask makes me feel like I can truly be myself. But maybe that's how everyone feels? Sometimes it's hard to tell which experiences are purely "Poe" and which are just part of regular ol' human condition.
* **[Kigurumi Outfit]** This is dumb. These spikes aren't even spikey. They're friggen'... Smooshy! Ugh. Smooshy... hehe. Smoosh smoosh smoosh... AH! I didn't know you were still here!
* **[Summer Outfit]** Uuugh why is it so hot out? I'm sweating my eyeliner off over here. You know what, I'm gonna go find a shady spot in the woods to hang out... Maybe throw myself into a creek in an effort to escape my own descent into unfettered madness. Wanna come?
* **[RPG Outfit]** Pssst. Wanna do a morally-questionable side quest with me? There's this village that needs rescuing from the clutches of a bloodthirsty phantom, BUT - if we help the phantom instead we could get ourselves some sweet demonic powers in return. Thoughts?
* **[Kimono Outfit]**

#### Poke

* What's with that mischievous smile? Oh! Ahaha! Aha!
* Ohoho no, don't you dare. I can't think straight when you touch me like that! Aww, so much for the poem I was writing in my head.
* Is that the cold hand of death I feel? Oh, it's just you... Haha! I'm only teasing. Come here!
* **(Naked)** Ahaha, that's nice. Carry on...
* **(Naked)** Mmmm. Hurts so good.
* **(Naked)** You're weird. And that's a turn-on.
* **(Naked)** I might still have a few feathers laying around, if you wanted to try tickling me with those...

#### Upgrade to Lover +

1. Ugh. This is the epitome of a sappy romance. I kind of hate it, but at the same time I totally adore you, so it evens out.
2. It's you and me versus the world, yeah?

### **Dialogue about Cole**

* They say don't judge a book by its cover, but, like, if the book is moldy and on fire - there's a problem.
* Cole has a terrible secret. I just know it. Everything about him just screams "Byronic hero."
* Cole seems like someone I might want to be friends with, if it wasn't for the constant shade he throws. Jeez, what'd I ever do to him?
* Advice from beyond the grave is probably trustworthy, right? Okay, so an apparition of a skeleton came to me last night and warned me to stay away from Cole. It might have been a dream, but like... It also might not have been.
* The eyes of that painting over there... Do they seem to be following us?
* Someone wrote "I will end your life" in red paint on the wall in my dorm. Joke's on them - I don't have a life. Ha!

## **Trivia**

* It's unclear how Poe first manages to get your number (and somehow mistakes you for Sirina).
* Poe's name and parts of his dialogue reference famous writer/poet Edgar Allen Poe, author of 'The Raven', among other works.
	+ Poe's name was originally "Serral" before Trash Panda/OjiPanda changed his name several hours after his debut in Beta.
* The meaning of life being 42 references The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.
* "Sweet dreams are made of these; who had a mind to disagree?" is a misquotation of the Eurythmics song 'Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)'.
* Along with Ferris, Poe is one of the only boys with visible earrings.
* His line "Why is a raven like a writing desk?" is a line from the Hatter in the book, *Alice's Adventures in Wonderland*.
* His Achievements are (almost) all related to real books such as "Brave New World" and "50 Shades of Grey".
* His dialogue about a barber from Fleet Street is a reference to the play "Sweeney Todd".
* The "cursed free soup" tree stump from the intro is likely a reference to a Tumblr post.
* "It's official. The road I walk isn't lonely anymore." is a reference to Boulevard of Broken Dreams by Green Day.
* "There sure are a lot of weirdos around here. That's cool though. I myself am strange and unusual." last sentence of this line is a direct quote from Beetlejuice's Lydia Deetz.
* His birthday is a reference to Edgar Allan Poe's date of death: October 7, 1849.

## Speculation

* Poe's English teacher is possibly Miss Desirée – a science teacher whose third photo indicates she's teaching English.
* His original name, Serral, is possibly a reference to Saeran from Mystic Messenger.

## Galleries

### Phone Fling Gallery

Am I “favorite” material? Or, likewise, am I only enjoyable to one type of person?This is Poe. He is not very self aware.It’s still a joke, and here’s the butt.
### Memory Album Gallery

Encounter PhotoEncounter Photo 2Frenemy PhotoAwkward Besties PhotoTransformation PhotoLover PhotoDinner Date (Animal Version)Boat Ride Date (Animal Version)Coaster Date (Animal Version)Carnvial Date (Animal Version)Dinner Date (Hybrid Version)Boat Ride Date (Hybrid Version)Coaster Date (Hybrid Version)Carnival Date (Hybrid Version)Dinner Date (Human Version)Boat Ride Date (Human Version)Coaster Date (Human Version)Carnival Date (Human Version)Masquerade DatePoe Line Up