Ash and His Friends Help Out Part 6 (Cartoon Paradise Parody Spoof)

**Ash and His Friends Help Out Part 6** is a Cartoon Paradise parody to Thomas and His Friends Help Out, but in order of episodes from all eleven volumes. It features four Season 1 episodes, three Season 2 episodes, three Season 3 episodes.

## Voice Cast

1. Ash Ketchum as Thomas (Sarah Natochenny)
2. Jackie Chan as Edward (James Sie)
3. Shaggy Rogers as Henry (Matthew Lillard)
4. Hayato Kanzaki as Gordon (Matt Hill)
5. Al Smith as James (Tom Kenny)
6. Ritchie as Percy (Tara Jayne)
7. Tyson Granger as Toby (Marlowe Gardiner-Heslin)
8. Toni and Mika Morgan as Annie and Clarabel (Stephanie Morgenstern and Jocelyne Loewen)
9. Hilary Tachibana as Henrietta (Caitriona Murphy)
10. Sonic The Hedgehog as Bertie (Jason Griffith)
11. Ryu Hoshi as Sir Topham Hatt (Kirby Morrow)
12. Morrigan Aensland as Lady Hatt (Brittney Wilson)
13. Tai Kamiya as Duck (Joshua Seth)
14. Tom Cat and Jerry Mouse as Bill and Ben (Don Brown and Samuel Vincent)
15. Marina Burton as Daisy (Colleen O'Shaughnessey)
16. Clay Bailey as BoCo (Jeff Bennett)
17. Flint Hammerhead as Trevor (R. Martin Klein)

## Episodes

1. Trouble For Ash
2. Freakazoid
3. The Flying Kipper
4. Virgil Takes Charge
5. Down The Mine
6. Shaggy's Forest
7. Alex and The Traffic Light
8. The Kongsel
9. Important Characters
10. Wrong Road
11. Richie Owns Up

## Script

### Trouble For Ash

* George Carlin: Ash Ketchum wouldn't stop being a nuisance. Night after night, he kept the other characters awake.
* Ash: I'm tired of pushing coaches. I wanna see the world.
* George Carlin: The other characters didn't take much notice, for Ash was a little character with a long tongue. But one night, Kevin came to the shed. He was a kind little character and felt sorry for Ash.
* Kevin: I've got some Beedrill to take home tomorrow. If you take them instead of me, I'll push coaches in the yard.
* Ash: Thank you.
* George Carlin: Said Ash.
* Ash: That would be nice.
* George Carlin: Next morning, Kevin and Ash asked their drivers, and when they said "yes", Ash ran off happily to find Beedrill. Now the Beedrill were silly and noisy. They talked a lot and don't attend to what they are doing. And I'm sorry to say they play tricks on a character who is not used to them. Kevin knew all about the Beedrill. He warned Ash to be careful but Ash was too excited to listen. The shunter fastened the coupling and when the signal dropped, Ash was ready. The conductor blew his whistle.
* Ash: Peep Peep.
* George Carlin: Answered Ash and started off. But the Beedrill weren't ready.
* Beedrill: Oh! Oh!
* George Carlin: They screamed.
* Beedrill: Wait, Ash, wait!
* George Carlin: But Ash wouldn't wait.
* Ash: Come on come on.
* George Carlin: He puffed.
* Beedrill: All right, don't fuss! All right, don't fuss!
* George Carlin: Grumbled the Beedrill. Ash began going faster and faster.
* Ash: Wheesh!
* George Carlin: He whistled, as he rush through Shaggy's tunnel.
* Ash: Hurry, hurry.
* George Carlin: Called Ash. He was feeling very proud of himself. But the Beedrill grew crosser and crosser. At last Ash slowed down as he came to Terry's Hill.
* Ash's Driver: Steady, now, steady.
* George Carlin: Warned the driver, as he reach the top. He began to put on the brakes.
* Ash: We're stopping, we're stopping!
* George Carlin: Called Ash.
* Beedrill: No, no, no!
* George Carlin: Answered the Beedrill bumping them to each other.
* Beedrill: Go on! Go on!
* George Carlin: Before the driver could stop them they had pushed Ash down the hill and were rattling and laughing behind them. Poor Ash tried hard to stop them from making him go too fast.
* Ash: Stop pushing, stop pushing!
* George Carlin: He hissed. But the Beedrill took no notice.
* Beedrill: Go on! Go on!
* George Carlin: They giggled in their silly way.
* Ash: There's the station! Oh dear, what shall I do?
* George Carlin: Cried Ash. They rattled straight through and swerved into the goods yard. Ash shut his eyes.
* Ash: I must stop!
* George Carlin: When he opened his eyes, he saw he had stopped just in front of the buffers. There watching him was...Steven.
* Steven: What are you doing here, Ash?
* George Carlin: He asked.
* Ash: I brought Kevin's Beedrill.
* George Carlin: Ash answered.
* Steven: Why did you come so fast?
* Ash: I didn't mean to. I was pushed.
* George Carlin: Said Ash.
* Steven: You've got a lot to learn about Beedrill, Ash. After pushing them about here for a few weeks you'll know almost as much about them as Kevin. Then you'll be a Really Useful Trainer.

### Freakazoid

* George Carlin: Autumn had come to the land of YTV. The fields were changing from yellow stubble to brown earth and an tractor was hard at work as Ash puff along. Later Ash saw the tractor close by.
* Freakazoid: Hello.
* George Carlin: Said the tractor.
* Freakazoid: I'm Freakazoid, I'm plowing.
* Ash: I'm Ash, I'm pulling a train. What ugly wheels you got.
* Freakazoid: They're not ugly, they're caterpillars.
* George Carlin: Said Freakazoid.
* Freakazoid: I can go anywhere. I don't need rails.
* Ash: I don't want to go anywhere.
* George Carlin: Said Ash.
* Ash: I like my rails, thank you.
* George Carlin: Winter came with dark clouds full of snow.
* Driver: I don't like it.
* George Carlin: Said Ash's driver.
* Driver: A heavy fall is coming. I hope it doesn't stop us.
* Ash: Huh!
* George Carlin: Puffed Ash.
* Ash: Soft stuff, nothing to it.
* George Carlin: And he puffed on feeling cold but confident. They finished their journey safely but by now the country was covered.
* Driver: You need your snowplough for the next journey, Ash.
* George Carlin: Said his driver.
* Ash: Huh! Snow is silly soft stuff it won't stop me.
* George Carlin: The snowplough was heavy and uncomfortable and made Ash cross. He shook it and he banged it and when they got back it was so damaged that the driver had to take it off.
* Driver: You're a very naughty boy.
* George Carlin: He said to Ash. Next morning, Ash's driver and fireman came early and worked hard to mend the snowplough, but they couldn't make it fit. Ash was pleased.
* Ash: I shan't have to wear it, I shan't have to wear it.
* George Carlin: He puffed to Suzy and Pietra. But they were rather worried.
* Suzy and Pietra: I hope it's all right, I hope it's all right.
* George Carlin: They whispered to each other. The driver was worried too.
* Driver: It's not bad here.
* George Carlin: He said to the fireman.
* Driver: But it's sure to be deep in the valley.
* Ash: Silly soft stuff.
* George Carlin: Huffed Ash.
* Ash: I didn't need that stupid old thing yesterday and I shan't today. Snow can't stop me.
* George Carlin: He rushed into a tunnel thinking how clever he was. But there was trouble ahead.
* (Crash)
* Ash: Cinders and ashes!.
* George Carlin: Said Ash.
* Ash: I'm stuck.
* George Carlin: And he was.
* Driver: Back, Ash, back.
* George Carlin: Said his driver. Ash tried but his feet run and he couldn't move. The conductor went back for help while everyone else tried to dig the snow away. But as fast as they dug, more snow slipped down until Ash was nearly buried.
* Ash: Oh, my wheels and coupling rods. I shall have to stop here till I'm frozen. What a silly boy I am.
* George Carlin: And Ash began to cry. At last the bus came to rescue the passengers. And then who should come to Ash's rescue but Freakazoid. Snow never worries him.
* (Freakazoid hooks up to Pietra and pulls her and Suzy out of the snow)
* George Carlin: He pulled the empty coaches away, then came back for Ash. Ash's feet were clear but still spun when he tried to move. Freakazoid tugged and slipped and slipped and tugged and at last dragged Ash clear of the snow ready for the journey home.
* (Freakazoid goes away into the tunnel with Ash following him)
* Ash: Oh, thank you, Freakazoid. Your caterpillars are splendid.
* George Carlin: Said Ash.
* Driver: I hope you'll be sensible now, Ash.
* George Carlin: Said his driver.
* Ash: I'll try.
* George Carlin: Said Ash and he puffed slowly away.

### The Flying Kipper

* George Carlin: One winter evening, Shaggy's Driver said...
* Driver: We'll be out early tomorrow. We've got to take the Flying Kipper. Don't tell Terry, but I think if we pull the Kipper nicely, Steven will let us pull the express. The special medicine they gave you is working well.
* Shaggy: Hooray!
* George Carlin: Cried Shaggy.
* Shaggy: That will be lovely.
* George Carlin: All kinds of ships use the harbour at the big station by the sea. There are passenger ships, cargo ships and fishing boats also come here. They unload their fish on the key. Some of them goes the shops in the town, and the rest in a special train to other places far away. This is the train the railwaymen called the Flying Kipper. Shaggy was ready at 5:00. There was snow and frost. Men hustled and shouted loading up the crates of fish. The last door banged, the guard showed his green lamp, and the Flying Kipper was ready to go.
* Shaggy: Come on, come on, don't be silly, don't be silly.
* George Carlin: Puffed Shaggy to the Beedrill. The Beedrill shuttered and groaned.
* Beedrill: Trickety-trock, trickety-trock, all right, all right!
* Shaggy: That's better, that's better.
* George Carlin: Puffed Shaggy. Clouds of smoke and steam poured from his funnel into the cold air, and the fire's light shown brightly.
* Shaggy: Hurry, hurry, hurry!
* George Carlin: Panted Shaggy. They were going well. The light grew better, signal light shown green as they passed. Then, a yellow signal appeard ahead. His driver prepared to stop, but the home signal was down.
* Driver: All clear, Shaggy. Away we go.
* George Carlin: They couldn't know the switches from the main line to a siding were frozen, and a home signal should have been set a danger, but snow had forced it down. A freight train was waited in a siding to let the Flying Kipper past, and a Driver and Fireman were drinking cocoa in the caboose.
* Conductor: The Kipper is due.
* George Carlin: Said the conductor.
* Fireman: Who cares?
* George Carlin: Said the Fireman.
* Fireman: This is good cocoa.
* George Carlin: The driver got up.
* Driver: Come on, fireman, back to our engine.
* George Carlin: They got out just in time.
* (Shaggy crashes into the break van and comes off the rails completely)
* George Carlin: Shaggy's driver and fireman had jumped clear before the crash, but Shaggy lay dazed and surprised. Steven came to see him.
* Shaggy: The signal was down, Sir.
* George Carlin: Said Shaggy.
* Steven: Cheer up, Shaggy. It wasn't your fault. Ice and snow cause the accident. I'm sending you to Crewe, a fine place for sick characters. They'll give you your new shape and a larger firebox. You'll feel a different character, and you won't need special medicine anymore. Won't that be nice?
* Shaggy: Yes, sir.
* George Carlin: Said Shaggy doubtfully. Shaggy liked being a Crewe, but was glad to come home. A crowd of people waited to see him arrive in his new shape. He looked so splendid and strong that they gave him three cheers.
* Shaggy: Peep, peep!
* George Carlin: He whistled.
* Shaggy: Thank you very much!
* George Carlin: I'm sorry to say that a lot of little children were often late for school, because they waited to see Shaggy go by. They often see him pulling the express. He does it so well that Terry is jealous. But that's another story.

### Virgil Takes Charge

* Alex: Do you know what?
* George Carlin: Asked Alex.
* Terry: What?
* George Carlin: Grunted Terry.
* Alex: Do you know what?
* Terry: Silly!
* George Carlin: Said Terry.
* Terry: Of course I don't know what. If you don't tell me what what is.
* Alex: Steven says that the work in the yard is too heavy for me. He's getting a bigger character to help me.
* Raimundo: Rubbish!
* George Carlin: Said Raimundo.
* Raimundo: Any character could do it. If you work hard and chatterless, this yard would be a sweeter, a better and a happier place.
* George Carlin: Alex went off to get some pets.
* Alex: That stupid old traffic light.
* George Carlin: He thought. He was remembering the time he misunderstood a traffic light and gone backwards instead of forwards.
* Alex: No one listens to me now. They think I'm a silly little kid and order me about. I'll show them, I'll show them.
* George Carlin: But he didn't know how. By the end of the afternoon, he felt tired and unhappy. He brought some pets to the station.
* Steven: Hello, Alex.
* George Carlin: Said Steven.
* Steven: You look tired.
* Alex: Yes sir, I am sir. I don't know if I'm standing on my head or on my feet.
* Steven: You look the right way up to me.
* George Carlin: Laughed Steven.
* Steven: Cheer up. The new character is bigger than you and can properly do the work alone. Would you like to help build my new harbour? Ash and Jackie will help too.
* Alex: Oh yes, sir. Thank you, sir.
* George Carlin: The new character arrived.
* Steven: What's your name?
* George Carlin: Asked Steven.
* Virgil: Montague, sir, but I'm usually called Virgil. They say I waddle. I don't really, sir, but I like Virgil better than Montague.
* Steven: Good. Virgil it shall be. Here, Alex, show Virgil around.
* George Carlin: The two characters went off together. Soon they were very busy. Raimundo, Terry and Shaggy watched Virgil quietly doing his work.
* Shaggy: He seems a simple sort of character.
* Raimundo: We'll have some fun and order him about.
* Shaggy, Terry and Raimundo: (quacking noises) Wheesh!
* George Carlin: Smoke billowed everywhere. Alex was cross, but Virgil took no notice.
* Virgil: They'll get tired of it soon. Do they tell you to do things, Alex?
* Alex: Yes they do.
* George Carlin: Answered Alex.
* Virgil: Right.
* George Carlin: Said Virgil.
* Virgil: We'll soon stop that nonsense.
* George Carlin: He whispered something.
* Virgil: We'll do it later.
* George Carlin: Steven was looking forward to hot buttered toast for tea at home. Suddenly, he heard an extroitnary noise.
* Shaggy, Terry and Raimundo: Wheesh! (snorting noises)
* Steven: Bother!
* George Carlin: He said and hurried to the yard. Virgil and Alex calmly sat on the switches outside the shed, refusing to let the characters in. Terry, Raimundo and Shaggy were furious.
* Steven: Stop that noise!
* George Carlin: Bellowed Steven.
* Terry: They won't let us in!
* George Carlin: Hissed Terry.
* Steven: Virgil, explain this behavior.
* Virgil: Beg pardon, sir, but I'm a teenager. We do our work without fuss, but begging your pardon, sir. Alex and I will be glad if you like to inform these, um, characters that we only take orders from you.
* (Raimundo and Terry blew their whistles loudly)
* Steven: Quiet!
* George Carlin: Said Steven.
* Steven: Alex and Virgil, I am pleased with your work today, but not with your behavior tonight. You have caused a disturbance.
* George Carlin: Terry, Shaggy and Raimundo sniggered.
* Steven: As for you.
* George Carlin: Thundered Steven.
* Steven: You've been worse. You made a disturbance. Virgil is quite right. This is my railway and I give the orders.
* George Carlin: After Alex went away, Virgil was left to manage alone. He did so...easily!

### Down The Hole

* George Carlin: One day, Ash was at the university when Terry shuffled in with some Beedrill.
* Ash: Phew!
* George Carlin: Remarked Ash.
* Ash: What a funny smell. Can you smell a smell?
* Suzy: I can't smell a smell.
* George Carlin: Said Suzy.
* Ash: A funny musty sort of smell.
* George Carlin: Said Ash.
* Terry: No one noticed until you did.
* George Carlin: Grumbled Terry.
* Terry: It must be yours.
* George Carlin: Not long ago, he had fallen into a dirty ditch. Ash enjoyed teasing him about it.
* Ash: Suzy, Pietra, do you know what I think it is? It's ditchwater.
* George Carlin: Before Terry could answer, Ash puffed away. Suzy and Pietra could hardly believe their ears.
* Suzy: He's dreadfully rude I feel quite ashamed.
* Pietra: I feel quite ashamed he's dreadfully rude.
* George Carlin: And to Ash they said.
* Suzy and Pietra: You musn't be rude, you make us ashamed.
* George Carlin: But Ash didn't care a bit.
* Ash: That was funny, that was funny.
* George Carlin: He chuckled. He felt very pleased with himself. Suzy and Pietra were deeply shocked. They have great respect for Terry McGinnis. Ash left the coaches at the station and went off to a mine for some Beedrill. Long ago, miners digging there have made tunnels under the ground. Their rooves are strong enough to hold up cars but not the weight of characters. A large notice warns them not to enter the area: Danger! Characters must not pass this board.
* Ash: Silly old board.
* George Carlin: Thought Ash. He had often tried to pass it but had never suceeded. But this morning he had made a plan. The fireman went to throw the switch.
* Ash: Now for my plan!
* George Carlin: Huffed Ash. Bumping the Beedrill fiercely he jerked his driver off the footplate and followed them into the siding.
* Driver: Come back!
* George Carlin: Yelled his driver.
* (A loud splash is heard as Ash falls to the mine)
* Ash: Fire and smoke!
* George Carlin: Said Ash.
* Ash: I'm sunk.
* George Carlin: And he was.
* Ash: Oh, dear.
* George Carlin: He said.
* Ash: I am a silly trainer.
* Steven: And a very naughty one, too. I saw you!
* George Carlin: Said Steven.
* Ash: Please let me out. I wont do it again.
* Steven: I'm not sure. We can't lift you out with the cranes. The ground's not firm enough. Hmm, let me see. I wonder if Terry could pull you out.
* Ash: Yes sir.
* George Carlin: Said Ash. But he didn't want to meet Terry just yet.
* Terry: Down the mine is he? Ha, ha, ha!
* George Carlin: Laughed Terry.
* Terry: What a joke! Boop boop! Little Ash, we'll have your out in a couple of puffs.
* George Carlin: Strong cables were fastened between the two characters.
* Steven: Are you ready? Heave!
* George Carlin: It was a lot harden than they all thought. But at last Ash was free.
* Ash: I'm sorry I was cheeky.
* George Carlin: Said Ash.
* Terry: That's all right, Ash. You made me laugh.
* George Carlin: Replied Terry.
* Terry: I'm in disgrace.
* Ash: So do I.
* George Carlin: Huffed Ash.
* Terry: Why so you are Ash. Shall we form an alliance? You help me and I help you.
* Ash: Right you are.
* George Carlin: Agreed Ash.
* Terry: Good. That's settled.
* George Carlin: Rumbled Terry. And buffer to buffer the allies puffed home.

### Shaggy's Forest

* George Carlin: Shaggy Rogers has lived on the land of YTV for many years. He wouldn't want to be anywhere else. He liked every part of it from the fields filled with flowers to the white sandy beaches. But there is one place that Shaggy always enjoyed visiting more than any other. His driver knew this too.
* Driver: Come on, Shaggy.
* George Carlin: He would sometimes say.
* Driver: We made good time today. We'll stop for a while by the forest.
* George Carlin: Shaggy loved it here. The forest was filled with broad oaks and tall pines. Shaggy could remember the day long ago when he and Jackie brought some new trees to be planted and Freakazoid and Heathcliff helped haul them into place. Now he could see the trees growing amongst the others. Shaggy always felt better for being here. He couldn't really explain why but his driver understood.
* Driver: It's peaceful.
* George Carlin: He said to Shaggy. But one night, everything changed. The characters were resting in the shed.
* Ash: Listen.
* George Carlin: Said Ash.
* Ash: Can you hear a strange whistling sound?
* Jackie: It's the wind blowing outside our shed.
* George Carlin: Replied Jackie.
* Jackie: But I never heard of like this before.
* Raimundo: Do you know.
* George Carlin: Added Raimundo.
* Raimundo: If Terry wasn't here now, I say it was him thundering by with the express.
* George Carlin: All the characters laughed, except Shaggy.
* Shaggy: I hope the wind won't harm the forest.
* George Carlin: By morning, the fierce winds have gone but the damage was done. Shaggy's driver came to see him in the yard.
* Driver: Trees have fallen on the line.
* George Carlin: He said.
* Driver: We must help clear the tracks.
* George Carlin: Ozzy set off with the breakdown train and Shaggy followed. Trees lay everywhere. The hillside now looked so bare. Shaggy felt sad.
* Shaggy: What will happen to all the animals who lived here?
* George Carlin: He thought. When Shaggy's flat Beedrill were full of logs, he took them to the timbermill where they will be turned to furniture and other things. Shaggy was glad the wood was being put to good use, but he was sorry to lose part of his forest.
* Jackie: Oh dear.
* George Carlin: Sighed Jackie to Ash.
* Jackie: I wish there was something we can do to make things better again.
* Ash: Yes indeed.
* George Carlin: Replied Ash.
* Ash: But what? We can't mend broken trees.
* Steven: Hello, Jackie.
* George Carlin: Said Steven.
* Steven: You do look glum.
* Jackie: I'm sad about the trees.
* George Carlin: Said Jackie.
* Jackie: And so is Shaggy. The forest is a special place to him. Now some of it was gone.
* Steven: We'll soon put that right.
* George Carlin: Replied Steven.
* Steven: I have an important job for you, Jackie. I will like you to take some Beedrill to the forest.
* George Carlin: When the Beedrill arrived, Jackie was delighted. They were full of splendid young trees already for plating.
* Jackie: This is the best job I've ever had.
* George Carlin: Said Jackie happily. When Shaggy returned, he was most surprised. There were Freakazoid and Heathcliff busily helping the workmen clear the torrents stumps and branches.
* Freakazoid: Look, Shaggy.
* George Carlin: Called Freakazoid.
* Freakazoid: We're beginning again. The hillside will look better than ever before. You'll see.
* George Carlin: Now whenever Shaggy stops by the forest, he could see the new trees growing strong and tall. Sometimes, everywhere was very quiet, and the other times, Shaggy could hear leaves rustling, or birds wing brushing the air. Often he can hear the distance sounds of children laughing, and always he is happy here.

### Alex and The Traffic Light

* George Carlin: Alex works in the hallways at the Cartoon University. He loves playing jokes, but they can get him into trouble. One morning, he was very cheeky indeed.
* Alex: Peep peep! Hurry up, Terry, the train's ready.
* George Carlin: Terry thought he was late.
* Alex: Ha, ha, ha, ha!
* George Carlin: Laughed Alex and showed him a train of dirty Beedrill. Terry thought how he can pay Alex back for teasing him. Next it was Raimundo's turn.
* Alex: Stay in the shed today, Raimundo. Steven will come and see you.
* Raimundo: Ah!
* George Carlin: Thought Raimundo.
* Raimundo: Steven knows I'm a fine boy. He wants me to pull the special train.
* George Carlin: Raimundo's driver and fireman could not make him move. The other characters grumbled dreadfully. They had to do Raimundo's work as well as their own. At last, the inspector arrived.
* Inspector: Show a wheel, Raimundo. You can't stay here all day.
* Raimundo: Steven told me to stay here. He sent a message this morning.
* Inspector: He did not. How could he? He's away for a week.
* Raimundo: Oh.
* George Carlin: Said Raimundo.
* Raimundo: Oh. Where's Alex?
* George Carlin: Alex had wisely disappeared. When Steven came back, he was cross with Raimundo and Alex for causing so much trouble. But the very next day, Alex was still being cheeky.
* Alex: I say, you characters, I'm to take some Beedrill to Ash's junction. Steven chose me specialy. He must know I'm a really useful kid.
* Raimundo: More likely, he wants you out of the way.
* George Carlin: Grumbled Raimundo. Terry looked across to Raimundo. They were going to play a trick on Alex.
* Terry: Raimundo and I were just speaking about traffic lights at the junction. We can't be too careful about traffic lights, but then I needn't say that to a really useful kid like you, Alex.
* George Carlin: Alex felt flattered.
* Raimundo: We've had spoken about backing traffic lights.
* George Carlin: Put in Raimundo.
* Raimundo: They need extra special care you know. Would you like me to explain?
* Alex: No thank you, Raimundo.
* George Carlin: Said Alex.
* Alex: I know all about signals.
* George Carlin: Alex was a little worried.
* Alex: I wonder what backing traffic lights are.
* George Carlin: He thought.
* Alex: Never mind, I'll manage.
* George Carlin: He puffed crossly to his Beedrill and felt better. He came to a traffic light.
* Alex: Bother, it's a danger.
* George Carlin: The traffic light moved to show line cleared. It's arm moved up instead of down. Alex had never been that sort of signal before.
* Alex: Down means go and up means stop. So upper still must mean go back. I know. It's one of those backing traffic lights.
* Driver: Come on, Alex.
* George Carlin: Said his driver.
* Driver: Off we go. Stop! You're going the wrong way!
* Alex: But it's a backing traffic light.
* George Carlin: Alex protested and told him about Terry and Raimundo. The driver laughed and explained.
* Alex: Oh, dear.
* George Carlin: Said Alex.
* Alex: Let's start quickly before they see us.
* George Carlin: He was too late. Terry saw everything. That night, the big characters talked about signals. They thought the subject was funny. Alex thought they were being very silly.

### The Kongsel

* George Carlin: Bumpty and Raphael are a pair of birds. Each has four feet and tiny chimney and dome and a small squat cab. Their Beedrill are filled with China Clay. It is needed for pottery, paper, paint and many other things. The animals were now kept busy pulling the Beedrill for characters on the main line and for ships in the harbour. One morning, they arranged some Beedrill and went away for more. They returned to find them all gone. The animals were most surprised. Their drivers examine the patch of oil.
* Driver: That's kongsel.
* George Carlin: They said.
* Bumpty: It's a what'll?
* George Carlin: Asked Bumpty.
* Raphael: A kongsel, I think.
* George Carlin: Replied Raphael.
* Raphael: There's a notice about them in our shed.
* Bumpty: Coughs and sneezles spread kongsels.
* Raphael: You had a cough in your smokebox yesterday. It's your fault the monkeysel came.
* Bumpty: It isn't!
* Raphael: It is!
* Drivers: Stop arguing, you two.
* George Carlin: Laughed their drivers.
* Drivers: Let's go and rescue our Beedrill.
* George Carlin: Bumpty and Raphael were horrified.
* Bumpty: But the kongsel will magic us away like the Beedrill.
* Drivers: He won't magic us.
* George Carlin: Replied their drivers.
* Drivers: We're more likely magic him. Listen, he doesn't know you're animals. So we'll take away your names and numbers and then this is what we'll do.
* George Carlin: Puffing hard, the animals set off on their journey to find the monkey. They were looking forward to playing tricks on him. Creeping into the yard, they found the kong on a siding with missing Beedrill. Raphael hid behind, but Bumpty went bodly alongside. The kong looked up.
* Donkey Kong: Do you mind?
* Bumpty: Yes.
* George Carlin: Said Bumpty.
* Bumpty: I do. I want my Beedrill please.
* Donkey Kong: These are mine.
* George Carlin: Said the kong.
* Donkey Kong: Go away.
* George Carlin: Bumpty pretended not to be frightened.
* Bumpty: You're a big bully.
* George Carlin: He whimpered.
* Bumpty: You'll be sorry.
* George Carlin: He ran back and hid behind the Beedrill on the other side. Raphael now came forward.
* Raphael: Beedrill stealer!
* George Carlin: Hissed Raphael. He ran away too. Bumpty took his place. This went on and on till the kong's eyes nearly popped out.
* Donkey Kong: Stop! You're making me giddy.
* George Carlin: The two birds gazed at him.
* Donkey Kong: Are there two of you?
* Bumpty: Yes, we're birds.
* Donkey Kong: I might have known it.
* George Carlin: Just then, Kevin bustled up.
* Kevin: Bumpty and Raphael, why are you playing here?
* Bumpty: We're not playing.
* George Carlin: Protested Bumpty.
* Raphael: We're rescuing our Beedrill.
* George Carlin: Squeaked Raphael.
* Raphael: Even you don't take our Beedrill without asking, but this kongsel did.
* Kevin: There's no cause to be rude.
* George Carlin: Said Kevin severly.
* Kevin: This kong is a Metropolitan Vickers, kong electric type 2.
* George Carlin: The birds were most impressed.
* Bumpty: We're sorry, mister...er...
* Donkey Kong: Never mind.
* George Carlin: The kong smiled.
* Donkey Kong: Call me Donkey Kong. I'm sorry I didn't understand about the Beedrill.
* Kevin: That's all right then.
* George Carlin: Said Kevin.
* Kevin: Now off you go, Bumpty and Raphael. Fetch Donkey Kong's Beedrill, then you take this lot. There's no real harm in them.
* George Carlin: He said to Donkey Kong.
* Kevin: But they're mattening at times.
* George Carlin: Donkey Kong chuckled.
* Donkey Kong: Mattening...
* George Carlin: He said.
* Donkey Kong: ...is the word.

### Important Characters

* George Carlin: One morning, Terry was in the yard drinking a soda of Pepsi.
* Raimundo: That's the third load of Pepsi you had today, Terry.
* George Carlin: Said Raimundo.
* Raimundo: Some might say you're being rather greedy.
* Gordon: I'm an important character.
* George Carlin: Replied Terry.
* Terry: Important characters need plenty of Pepsi, but I doubted if you would understand that, Raimundo.
* George Carlin: Raimundo snorted and went about his work. Later, Terry was taking on water from a standpipe because the water tower was under repair.
* Virgil: I wouldn't drink too much of that water if I were you, Terry. It might give you boiler-ache.
* Terry: Pah!
* George Carlin: Said Terry.
* Terry: What's this? Educating Terry day? First Raimundo, now you, Virgil. Big characters have big needs. Little characters are just annoying.
* Virgil: Don't say I didn't warn you.
* George Carlin: Laughed Virgil. Later, Terry steamed into the yard at the big station.
* Terry: That's what I need.
* George Carlin: Explained Terry. There emergen out of his sheds were two shiny tenders.
* Terry: Now If I had two tenders.
* George Carlin: Said Terry.
* Terry: I wouldn't need to stop so often. And I wouldn't have to listen to silly little characters.
* Driver: Those tenders belong to a visitor.
* George Carlin: Replied his driver. Ken sidled up alongside.
* Ken: Everyone knows that tenders are a mark and distinction, but I'm afraid that no amount of tendres will save you in the end. We villains are taking over, and we don't need tenders to make us important, not even one.
* George Carlin: Terry was most upset. He was feeling just the same next morning.
* Terry: I'm not happy.
* Virgil: I know.
* George Carlin: Said Virgil.
* Virgil: It's boiler-ache.
* Terry: It's not boiler-ache.
* George Carlin: Protested Terry.
* Terry: It's...
* Shaggy: Of course it is.
* George Carlin: Interrupted Shaggy.
* Shaggy: That water's bad. Have a good wash-out, then you feel a different character. Your boiler must be full of sludge.
* Terry: Don't be vulgar.
* George Carlin: Huffed Terry. He backed on his train hissing mournfully.
* Steven: Cheer up, Terry.
* George Carlin: Said Steven.
* Terry: I can't, sir. Is it true what villains said, sir?
* Steven: What does his say?
* Terry: That villains are taking over.
* Steven: Don't worry, Terry. That will never happen on my railway.
* Terry: One more thing, sir. Why did the visitor have two tenders?
* Steven: Because he lives on the railway with long difference between coaling depots.
* George Carlin: Terry felt better. But Shaggy started complaining. He banged some Beedrill angrily.
* Shaggy: I always worked hard enough for two.
* George Carlin: He puffed.
* Shaggy: I deserved another tender.
* George Carlin: Virgil whispered something to Ozzy. He was going to play a trick on Shaggy.
* Virgil: Shaggy?
* George Carlin: He asked.
* Virgil: Would you like my tenders?
* Shaggy: Yours?! What have you got to do with tenders?
* Virgil: All right.
* George Carlin: Said Virgil.
* Virgil: The deals off. Would you like them, Ozzy?
* Ozzy: I wouldn't deprive you of the honor.
* George Carlin: Replied Ozzy.
* Virgil: It is a great honor.
* George Carlin: Continued Virgil thoughtfully.
* Virgil: But I'm only a teenager. Perhaps Raimundo might...
* Shaggy: I'm sorry I was rude.
* George Carlin: Said Shaggy hastily.
* Shaggy: How many tenders have you and when can I have them?
* Virgil: Uh, hmm, I have six and you can have them this evening.
* Shaggy: Six lovely tenders!
* George Carlin: Chortled Shaggy.
* Shaggy: What a splendid sight I'll be.
* George Carlin: Shaggy was excited all day.
* Shaggy: Do you think it'll be all right?
* George Carlin: He asked for umpteenth time.
* Virgil: Of course.
* George Carlin: Said Virgil.
* Virgil: They're already now.
* George Carlin: The other characters waited where they can each get a good view. But Shaggy wasn't a splendid sight at all. His six tenders were very old, dirty and filled with boiler sludge.
* Terry: Have a good wash-out, Shaggy?
* George Carlin: Called a voice.
* Terry: That's right. You'll feel a different character now.
* George Carlin: Shaggy was not sure, but he thought his voice belongs to Terry.

### Wrong Road

* George Carlin: Ash's route is important and so is Kevin's. But their tracks and bridges are not so strong as those on the main line. Steven does not allow the heavier main line engines like Terry to run on them. But one day, the way Terry was talking, he would have tought Steven had given this order for quite another reason.
* Terry: It's not fair!
* George Carlin: Grumbled Terry.
* Kevin: What isn't fair?
* George Carlin: Asked Kevin.
* Terry: Letting branch line diesels pull main line trains.
* Kevin: Never mind, Terry. I'm sure Donkey Kong will let you pull his Beedrill sometimes.
* George Carlin: Terry spluttered.
* Terry: I wont pull Donkey Kong's dirty Beedrill. I wont run on branch lines.
* Kevin: Why not it will be a nice change.
* Terry: Steven would never approve.
* George Carlin: Huffed Terry.
* Terry: Branch lines are vulgar.
* George Carlin: Terry puffed away. Kevin chuckled and followed him to the station. Every evening the two characters pulled two fast trains from the station. Terry always leaves first with an express for the main line. Kevin follows five minutes later with his train for the branch line. Usually everything runs like clockwork. But tonight there was trouble. A Lady in a green floppy hat was saying goodbye to a friend. It was nearly time for Terry to start. The fireman looked back towards the conductor's van and saw something green waving.
* Fireman: Right away, mate!
* George Carlin: He thought the conductor had waved his flag. Terry started. Leaving luggage, his passengers and the conductor all standing on the platform. Everyone was very surprised and cross. To make matters worse, by the time Terry had been stopped and brought back, Kevin was already late with his train. So now, he set off first. But the signalman at the junction wasn't told about the change. By mistake, he sent Kevin along the main line. Terry was sent along the branch and arrived cold and cross on one of the sidings near the harbour. Next morning, Bumpty and Raphael peeped into the yard. There were no Beedrill for them but they didn't mind that. Teasing Terry will be much better fun.
* Bumpty: What's that?
* George Carlin: Asked Bumpty.
* Raphael: Sheesh!
* George Carlin: Whispered Raphael.
* Raphael: It's Terry.
* Bumpty: It looks like Terry, but it can't be. Terry never comes on the branch lines. He thinks they're vulgar.
* George Carlin: Terry pretended he hadn't heard.
* Raphael: If it isn't Terry.
* George Carlin: Said Raphael.
* Raphael: It's just a pile of Old Iron.
* Bumpty: Which we better take it to the scrapyard.
* Raphael: No Bumpty, this blocks used for scrap we'll take it to the harbour and dump it in the sea.
* George Carlin: Terry was alarmed.
* Terry: I am Terry. Stop, stop!
* George Carlin: When Donkey Kong suddenly arrived, Terry thought him the most beautiful sight he had ever been.
* Terry: Donkey Kong, my dear character, save me.
* George Carlin: Donkey Kong quickly sized up the situation and threathened to take away the Beedrill he had brought for Bumpty and Raphael. This made the twin behave at once. Terry thought Donkey Kong was wonderful.
* Terry: Those little demons. How do you do it?
* Donkey Kong: Ah well.
* George Carlin: Said Donkey Kong.
* Donkey Kong: It's just a knack.
* George Carlin: Terry still believed that Donkey Kong saved his life. But he knows the twins were only teasing. Don't we?

### Richie Owns Up

* George Carlin: On a clear day when the sky is blue and there is just enough breeze to blow the clouds away, you can stand on a big hill above the valley and watch Virgil and Richie far below, busily at work on Virgil's branch line near the sea. The two characters are very proud of their matching coats of gleaming color. Richie often talks about the time that Drix saved him from scrap.
* Richie: If it wasn't for his help...
* George Carlin: Richie would say.
* Richie: I might have caught when I ran away from the scrapyard, and I would never come to live here on Steven's railway.
* George Carlin: The other characters all wanted to know about Richie's adventures.
* Shaggy: Amazing!
* George Carlin: Remarked Shaggy.
* Raimundo: Richie...
* George Carlin: Said Raimundo.
* Raimundo: ...has resource.
* Terry: And sagacity.
* George Carlin: Put in Terry.
* Alex: What does that mean?
* George Carlin: Whispered Alex.
* Ash: I think...
* George Carlin: Replied Ash.
* Ash: ...it's about being clever and wise.
* Terry: He is...
* George Carlin: Finished Terry.
* Terry: ...an example to us all.
* George Carlin: I'm sorry to say that Richie became very puffed up in the smokebox.
* Richie: Shaggy says I'm amazing. He's right.
* George Carlin: He whistled as he swooshed along the line. One morning, Steven came to see him.
* Steven: You are doing well. Now you must learn how to look after Beedrill.
* George Carlin: Every wise character knows that you cannot trust Beedrill. The other charactesr warned Richie but he took no notice.
* Richie: You think I can manage.
* George Carlin: He said huffly.
* Richie: Terry knows better. He's says I'm sagacious.
* Virgil: You may be good gracious or whatever you called it, but Beedrill can be troublesome and...
* Ozzy: Say no more, Virgil.
* George Carlin: Interested Ozzy,
* Ozzy: It's a pity, but the wee character just learned for itself.
* George Carlin: Richie pulled some loaded Beedrill into a siding and pushed the empties into the chute. Then he came back to take the loaded Beedrill away. But they were comfortable and didn't want to move.
* Beedrill: What right is he to poke his head in here? We want Virgil or Ozzy! Or Drix!
* Richie: Look sharp.
* George Carlin: Huffed Richie.
* Beedrill: That's not the way to speak.
* George Carlin: Hissed the Beedrill.
* Beedrill: We'll get even.
* George Carlin: Richie heard nothing. The Beedrill move smoothly at first, then suddenly, Richie found them forced forward. His driver applied the brakes, but they were useless against the surging Beedrill.
* Beedrill: On, on, on!
* George Carlin: Yelled the Beedrill. Richie formed hard, but still they forced them on and on. At last, the Beedrill grew tired.
* Richie: I'm winning.
* George Carlin: Gasped Richie. But it was too late. Richie layed bruised and benuised, bunkered down in the turntable well. Virgil survaved the damaged.
* Virgil: Hello, Richie. Are you being a good gracious character? Beg pardon, we really don't like this sort of surprise. Ozzy and Drix will miss their turntable until it was mended.
* George Carlin: That night, Richie was hold gently to safety.
* Richie: I'm sorry, sir.
* George Carlin: He said to Steven.
* Richie: I shouldn't listen to Virgil's advice. I don't feel good gracious or whatever it is. I just feel silly.
* Steven: Well, Richie.
* George Carlin: Replied Steven.
* Steven: Now you know the damage Beedrill can do.
* Richie: Yes I do, sir. I look like a load of scrap iron.
* Steven: Oh, I don't think so.
* George Carlin: Laughed Steven.
* Steven: But you do need to go to the works to be mended.
* George Carlin: The other characters now felt sorry for Richie.
* Virgil: The branch line would be a same without you.
* George Carlin: Whistled Virgil.
* Virgil: Come back soon.
* George Carlin: A few days later, Richie did come back. His coat paint glistended in the sun. He's a wiser character too and never made the same about Beedrill again.