Cain Lowell

**Cain Lowell** is the son of MARF from PHYRE EMBLUM, and he is a sissy!

## Info

Name: Cain Lowell

Age: 14

Parent's Story: Fire Emblem

Appearance: I'm a girly blue-haired boy who dresses in flamboyant clothes and a tiara.

Alignment: Rebel

Roommate: Reilly Feelingit

Secret Heart's Desire: To spend forever with my cute little blankie.

My Magic Touch: I am skilled with a sword.

Storybook Romance Status: I'm too scared to date. The girls here are so mean to me.

Oh Curses Moment: Sometimes I soil my boxers at night.

Favorite Subject: Beast Training and Care. I love those cute little animals.

Least Favorite Subject: Super Smash Class. Apricot Toadstool always beats me at it.

Best Friends Forever After: Lucky Bucket because he's cutesy.

## Biography

Hello. I'm Cain Lowell. My daddy is Marth, Emperor of Archanea, and my mommy is his beard, Caeda. (A beard is a woman who marries a gay guy to cover up his homosexuality.) I live with my mommy and daddy and my mean big sister who beats me up every day. My aunt Elice and uncle Merric live nearby.

I go to Ever After High because Daddy bought me a subscription. I think it's a cute place to be. There's lots of fluffy animals and sparkles. I love cute animals. They're so soft.
I have a blue blanket which I carry everywhere just like Linus from Peanuts. I hug blankie and snuggle with him in bed. I don't let people touch my blanket. The teachers tell me no blankets in class, but I cry when my blankie gets taken away. Kids make fun of my blankie too. I think they're just being bullies.

Despite my cuteness, I'm a badass sword fighter, and I am fast on my toes. I'm also in Super Smash Bros., where I play against the other students. I especially like to stick a sword through Bowser's throat and spank Samus in the a$$. I also speak exclusively Japanese while fighting. Girls think I'm sexy and they like to write yaoi fanfics shipping me with other male Fire Emblem characters such as Roy and Ike. I love baby animals too - they're so cute! I'm scared of hunting because it involves shooting poor, defenseless animals. That's so mean!

I pet animals whenever I get the chance, even when I risk being bitten. I also enjoy vacations in Talys and Altea, where I go swimming with the cute baby seals. (I wear speedos, BTW. They're sexy.) Seals are my most favoritest animals, and I cry when they're clubbed during the Canadian seal hunt. Canada needs to have a law against killing baby seals.

I don't know if I want to be in Fire Emblem because when you die in Fire Emblem, you die for good. I guess being Marth isn't all that great. My destiny says that I have to save Archanea from Medeus, but I'd rather stay home with my blankie and cuddle the cute baby sealies.

Blankie says goodnight. Cain says goodnight.

## Trivia

* Marth's surname Lowell only appears in the anime adaptation and does not appear in any of the games.
* Cain needs a bed liner when he goes to bed due to his bedwetting problem.
* Cain loves Pooh's Adventures.
* Cain is afraid of the dark, getting minor injuries, and the guy on the oatmeal box.
* He worships pagan gods because according to him they're "nicer" than the Christian God.
* He is friends with Letitgo Arendelle and Inga Trolsen.
* He wears nail polish and a tiara.
* His favorite toy is a stuffed seal named Lamby Pie.