recursal/Fanatic-Fandom huggingface dataset:
Patchy the Pirate VS Frenchy

**Patchy the Pirate VS Frenchy** is the 9th battle of UMDTOTC DEMO and the 30th battle overall! It features Patchy the Pirate against Frenchy (or French Narrator) in a battle of the narrators of Spongebob Squarepants!

## Dissers

Both played by Bob-crust!

* Patchy the Pirate
* Frenchy

## Lyrics

*[Patchy the Pirate is in Purple, Frenchy is in Brown, and Potty is in Green!]*

### **Patchy the Pirate - Verse 1:**

Are you ready kids for me to diss this joke of a Jacque?

Hmm… where do I start? There’s just so many things to mock!

With that scuba gear, ya’ looking like a Cyclops!

With the suit always on, you probably got scurvy! I can’t be topped!

I met Pink and the man on the penny, and I don’t think you’re ready

To get beat by Spongebob’s #1 fan, so keep you’re submarine steady!

I rap so good, it’s like my mouth was mayonnaise!

Your raps being good is as likely as the sponge getting a raise!

\*Bock\* Dumb voice! Get out of here Potty!

But, the birds right. You’re voice is more annoying than Carol Channing’s!

I’m in all the specials, you’re just a dumb gag!

You’re an ignorant, scuba-diving elf with no swag!

### **Frenchy - Verse 1:**

One eternity later, your verse is finally finished.

Your verse had more filler than the specials you’ve been in!

(Oh!) It took you 20 years to meet your sponge idol!

You don’t know how to Wumbo, so why you trying to steal my title?

You special? Well there is something messed up in your head going on!

Your raps are worse than your green screen effects! I'm so done!

Man, you’re ugly! It’s like I’m looking into a smudged mirror!

You wouldn’t be anymore scary, if you were bloated with Krabs’ root beer!

I don’t wanna hear you rap again, so I’ll take you and push you somewhere else!

Try to beat me, kid?... Don’t push yourself!

### **Patchy the Pirate - Verse 2:**

That verse made me more disappointed than watching that walk cycle!

You’ve got no screen time and have the same one joke being recycled!

My raps are on level with Gary Come Home!

Your raps are in the trash, le-le-left-left alone! (Oh!)

### **Frenchy - Verse 2:**

Patchy? How’d you not find Spongebob? He was inside the whole time!

You’re alone, I’m friends with Sandy! She taught me how to box rhyme!

You think you’re #1? I was the first to talk in the series!

Look at your stop-motion version, I can’t take you serious!

You can’t have basic hygiene, because you spend it all on merch!

You can’t be beat, I’ve got the strength of a whale bite in my verses!
Terry the FBI Agent

**Terry the FBI Agent** appeared as a Third-party member in Lawrence Daley VS Paul Blart and Third Wave Feminist VS Incel!

## Lyrics

### **Lawrence Daley VS Paul Blart:**

Actually, I think Terry is a great name!

You’re so fat it’s disgusting, you ain’t no great dane!

That smell of yours is just so reaking reaking!

And your search history is just so freaking creeping!

If you wonder how I knew that, I’m an FBI agent!

And Larry your movie is just so ancient!

I forgot it even existed until I just saw you!

And it’s so low-brow, I would rather watch Cailou!

I’m the guard, who watches you guards!

I’m like the Ace in a deck of cards!

And don’t forget that I watch your every move!

Every creepy thing and every strange groove!

Blart, you’re chunky and I don’t mean thicc!

Daley, you watch just creepy things like “Lick Lick Lick”

It’s more disgusting than the nuts you're busting!

And even more than Paul’s toes, they’re crusting!

### **Third Wave Feminist VS Incel:**

Shut it lard mouth, I’ve had enough of this hateful shtick!

You two hissy-fissies will feel some real equality up in this sh\*t!

Speaking of equality, it doesn’t happen literally because of you two!

‘Cause right now the world hates you both more than Hitler hated the Jews!

Starting with you, Pinkalicious, because I will see another Feminist argument later!

You sexist towards men, but there a male Feminists. But, the only one trust is Sam Slader!

Well, here’s a tip for all the women with your opinions who men’s love they hunt:

Don’t play hard to get, when you are hard to want! (Snap!)

And you, you sexist rubber hog! You guys are quite literally pathetic!

And something that ain’t helping is spending half of your life on Reddit!

You spend your time insulting women, when you should be spending it in the bathtub!

And as an FBI Agent, I would know, you cure your sexual desires off on P\*rnhub!

I’ve never seen such loud mouth individuals, and I’ve seen a lot of ‘em!

I would insults your guy’s intelligence, but I think everyone already knows you guys are dumb!
Circe

**Circe** battled Medusa in Medusa VS Circe!

## Information on the Disser!

"Circe (/ˈsɜːrsi/; Greek: Κίρκη Kírkē pronounced [kírkɛː]) is a goddess of magic or sometimes a nymph, enchantress or sorceress in Greek mythology. She is a daughter of the god Helios and either the Oceanid nymph Perse or the goddess Hecate. Circe was renowned for her vast knowledge of potions and herbs. Through the use of these and a magic wand or staff, she would transform her enemies, or those who offended her, into animals."

-Circe Wikipedia Article

## Lyrics

### **Verse 1:**

What are you trying to do? I Odyssey this!

Yes, I lure in men, but you’re just a virgin, so your pissed!

I’ll tell you the truth because you surely missed the point!

As, from the looks of it, you don’t get any guy’s points!

I turned these men to animals so I could eat them for food!

You’re just a scary Bloody Mary, let me change the mood! (Oo-)

You ugly skunk b\*tch, with your snake hair flying!

Listen, I’ll kill you faster than that one flute guy dying…

I’ll battle you for seven years, but it will feel like a minute!

I’ll beat you buttocks like a puzzle, I’ll split it!

Come on, give up! I’ve ripped you to shreds!

I’ll tear the snakes from your head, and coat my bed!

### **Verse 2:**

Stop being a little jerk! This is no way to treat the Goddess of Magic!

You’re so ugly, that you’re face literally kills, you’re nose is like hatchet!

Cause Medusa, I’ll roll you around on a rollaround, I'll get you with my stride!

Because this ride is like men, they are things you’ll never get to ride!

Your voice sounds like a firetruck, flowing down the street!

Flowing much better than you ever will, ‘cause you voice reeks!

I’ll own you like your collect of stone statues, what a kink!

Also a tip, you can’t bang a stone, ya’ little stink! (Ha!)
Budynki

Budynki w grze dzielą się na **5 głównych kategorii**. Są nimi budynki funkcyjne, stoiska, toalety, śmietniki oraz drogi.

## Budynki funkcyjne

Po odczekaniu czasu budowy gracz jest w stanie zatrudnić 5 pracowników na raz. Każdy **dodatkowy slot do pracownika kosztuje 5 diamentów**.

* Główne zoo
* Jodłowy gaj

Budynek podobnie jak Willa pracowników ma dodatkowe sloty do hodowli gatunków.

* Główne zoo
* Jodłowy gaj

**Ogrody zoologiczne członków klubu można odwiedzać w każdej chwili.** Czat klubowy umożliwia rozmowy między członkami. Dzięki temu budynkowi można uzyskać **rzadkie statuetki** i **nowe umaszczenia** zwierząt z gry i **dodatkowe bonusy.**
Jest to budynek, który co jakiś czas pozwala wylosować **nagrodę**. Czas, aby użyć koło fortuny kolejny raz, **zwiększa się o minutę**, po użyciu koła. Nagrody się zmieniają, a szczęście zależy tylko od losu.
 **🟊** ***waluty w grze***
**🟊** *karta **zwierzaka** sklepowego*

Dodatkowo ten budynek odblokowuje **Album kolekcjonerski**. Aktualnie dostępne są 3 poziomy kolekcji w albumie. W albumie kolekcjonerskim jest możliwość zdobycia wyjątkowych **umaszczeń zwierząt** oraz unikalnych gatunków do swojego zoo:

Pampasowiec grzywiasty Zwierzę kolekcjonerskie

Borsucznik amerykańskiZwierzę kolekcjonerskie

* Główne zoo
* Jodłowy gaj

## Kosze na śmieci

Śmietniki można **opróżniać samodzielnie**, albo **za pomocą sprzątacza**, który pomoże w zbieraniu śmieci.

## Toalety

Toalety w grze nie przynoszą punktów doświadczenia, ani pieniędzy. Podnoszą jedynie **popularność zoo**.

## Drogi

**Drogi nie przynoszą jednak żadnych korzyści ale są wymagane do poprawnego działania zoo.**

**ᐊ Wróć do *Strona główna***
Alien VS Predator

**Alien VS Predator** is the 1st episode of UMDTOTC Demo and is the 22nd episode overall! It features the Alien from the Alien franchise against the Predator from the Predator franchise in a battle of rival SCI-FI horror/action movie monsters!

**Battle Length**: 1:25

## Dissers

Bob-crust plays all!

* Alien
* Predator
* Kane (Cameo)

## Lyrics

*[Alien is in Dark Blue, Predator is in Dark Orange, and Kane is in Gray!]*

### **Alien - Verse 1:**

Good Ripley, you’re one ugly mother f\*cker!

My suspenseful films keep everyone on their tippy-toes, sucker!

My first two give joy, you couldn’t even get past film one!

Your hair beads don’t know what’s coming, I’ve already won!

I am the mother of my beyond believe beasts, you will be their supper!

The only thing attracted to you is the fangs of a face-hugger!

You cloak yourself to hide your hideous \*ss body that bothers!

You can't beat me even with your fancy tools! Game over, man, game over!

### **Predator - Verse 1:**

Not even your mouth tongue can’t handle me, you’re weak!

While you get mowed down by some pawns and bishops, buff men I beat!

You’re primitive life can’t be compared to my futuristic armor!

Too bad every one of your films after Aliens was a complete bummer!

You scared? Then you might wanna get to the chopper!

I might’ve been beat, but at least it wasn’t Blain-ly just some little lady, ya’ dumber!

Your flow is even worse than Hawkin’s f\*ckin’ jokes!

Your mama’s so fat like she ate 500 Dutch Mac n’ cheese bites, yo!

### **Alien - Verse 2:**

Get away from me you b\*tch! Your face is too much to handle ‘er!

Your lines made my children's ears bleed! I guess they don’t like your corny lines either!

With you Jason X mask and your wack-\*ss sequel!

My films disappointing? Have you seen your un-funny 2018 reboot, yo?

If I wanted true horror I would burst out a- AHH! Chest-burster!

I’ll stab my tail through your back and let you bleed out, you’re the worst!

### **Predator - Verse 2:**

Let me bleed out? Ha! I don’t got time to bleed!

I don’t need a mech or space-shaft to beat ya’, so you better leave!

I’ve got all Schwarz of beef with you, so let me start the timer for your demise!

I would “HAHAHAHAHAHAHA” right into your face, but you don’t got any eyes!

You may spit acid, but I’m the one spitting out the real burns!

You think I’m scared of a martian with the face-construction of Mr. Burns?
Duff Goldman

**Duff Goldman** dissed Guy Fieri, Robert Irvine, Bobby Flay, and Anne Burrell in the Battle Royale: Guy Fieri VS Robert Irvine!

## Information on the Disser!

"Jeffrey Adam "Duff" Goldman (born December 17, 1974) is a pastry chef and television personality. He is the executive chef of the Baltimore-based Charm City Cakes shop which was featured in the Food Network reality television show *Ace of Cakes*, and his second Los Angeles-based shop Charm City Cakes West, which is featured in Food Network's *Duff Till Dawn* and "Cake Masters" series. His work has also been featured on the *Food Network Challenge*, *Iron Chef America*, *Oprah*, *The Tonight Show with Jay Leno*, *Man v. Food*, *Buddy vs. Duff*, and *Duff Takes the Cake*."

-*Duff Goldman Wikipedia Article*

## Lyrics

*[Duff Goldman is in Gold, Bobby Flay is in normal text!]*

Stop it all, and fall down… to the Ace of Cakes,

I will slash you all like a mace!

I’m-a big tough guy, who actually sweet and caring

Did you hear that Irvine, caring!

It’s one thing to help someone’s restaurant out

But, that doesn’t mean you get to be a jerk about-

And Guy, you’ve been pushed around enough already…

But, You should stop horsing around like jeez!

You should try sucking deez…

Fake raviolis from Bobby Flay!

As Beat Bobby Flay is totally fake, you got slayed!

Hey, I already used that rhyme-

But, it’s not nearly as fake as WCIA!

Yes you heard that right, Anne!

You really expect me to think someone can’t use a frying pan!?

I see you’re all weeping, that’s apart of the plan!
Dinnerbone

**Dinnerbone** rapped alongside Notch and Jeb against Shigeru Miyamoto in Shigeru Miyamoto VS Notch!

## Information on the Disser!

"Nathan 'Dinnerbone' Adams is a game developer at Mojang AB who worked on Java Edition, Bedrock Edition, and its launcher. A member of the Bukkit team, Adams was hired by Mojang on February 28, 2012 to develop the mod API. His first day at the Mojang office was March 27, 2012, shortly before the first development snapshots for version Java Edition 1.3.1.

A common trope attributed to Dinnerbone is that he is commonly displayed as being upside-down. His Twitter avatar is flipped and his user model, as well as any mob named "Dinnerbone", will be rendered upside-down."

-Dinnerbone Minecraft Wiki Article

## Lyrics

*[Dinnerbone is in Brown, Notch and Jeb are in Regular text!]*

### **During Notch's 3rd Verse:**

Oh, I’m Dinnerbone, you eat alone!

I’m a super duper hacker a high tip of the cone!

While I’m upside down, giving high fives downtown!

You’re just an old guy who creepily never frowns!

I’m a clean British, to your Asian squinty eyes!

But, believe me I’m nice, it says it on the wiki, guys!

(Hey!) What does the Captain say?

Hey says don’t ruin your beloved characters with sh\*tty gameplay any day!

And believe me you should trust him, he’s one of my best pals!

We have sold billions of copies, we are so very well endowed!

(OH!) You’re nothing Miyamoto, you lost your fame 10 years ago!

Our only problem is boat glitches though!

Too bad your wife and son don’t do squat sh\*t!

While you’re programming complete trash, working with 8-bit video-bits!
Pepsi Man

**Pepsi Man** went against Kool-Aid Man in Pepsi Man VS Kool-Aid Man!

## Information on the Disser!

"Pepsiman, or Pepsi Man, is a superhero mascot for PepsiCo that had the power to deliver the beverage to those in need. He appeared in a total of 13 Pepsi commercials, as well as in his own comic series in Japan titled *Pepsiman: Seigi no tame no tōsō*.

Pepsiman was created as a result of scientist Satoru Shujinko accepting the power of the Holy Pepsi into his heart. After awaking from his transformation, Satoru, now Pepsiman, returns to the Pepsi headquarters of Japan at which he works. On his way into the building, he hears a cry from a distressed citizen, made thirsty by the slowly expanding sun. He then saves the citizen, as well as the planet, and assumes his rightful place as Pepsiman."

-*Pepsi Man Article (Superhero Wiki)*

## Lyrics

### **Verse 1:**

Pepsi Man here, to save the day!

Against this fat ton of lard, get out of my way!

I will save the day with my whimsical rhymes

And your drinks suck, they should cost a few dimes!

I will get what I know you have in mind

A can of Pepsi, it’s thirst-quenching time!

You can’t catch up to me with my super speed!

Your drink is almost as sticky as the silver I peed!

### **Verse 2:**

I have a job, I deliver Pepsi for PepsiCo!

You just hang out with children, you gotta go!

And I love my abs, thanks for mentioning that

And I’m not really clumsy, that’s just an act!

### **Verse 3:**

Sorry, gotta cut you off. I really gotta go!

But, I gotta question before I do though!

Is it true that your juice inside you is your life?

So, If I push you over it will be like stabbing you with a knife!
Giant Flying Spaghetti Monster

**The Giant Flying Spaghetti Monster** was the 4th and final person to rap against Morgan Freeman in the gauntlet battle: Morgan Freeman VS Jesus Christ!

## Information on the Disser!

"The Flying Spaghetti Monster (FSM) is the deity of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, or Pastafarianism. Pastafarianism (a portmanteau of pasta and Rastafarianism) is a social movement that promotes a light-hearted view of religion and opposes the teaching of intelligent design and creationism in public schools. According to adherents, Pastafarianism is a "real, legitimate religion, as much as any other". In New Zealand, Pastafarian representatives are authorized to officiate weddings. However, in the United States, a federal court has ruled that the "Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster" is not a real religion. In August 2018 the Dutch Council of State also ruled that Pastafarianism is not a religion."

-*Flying Spaghetti Monster Wikipedia Article*

## Lyrics

Welcome Morgan, to the REAL God b\*\*\*h!

And I’ll murder you with a single hitch!

I am the God of the entire world!

Now strip down to your knees, I’m unpearled!

You don’t look like a pastafarian!

And you don’t look like a pirate-farian!

I’ll see your ugly face on Ramendan!

And when you see me, you’ll keep running, done!

And no you aren’t invited to Pastover!

I guess you could say you’re being passed over!

Don’t try to combat me, don’t even bother!

And you’ll die completely unknown, like your father! (Oh!)
Morgan Freeman

**Morgan Freeman** battled Jesus Christ, God, Satan, and the Giant Flying Spaghetti Monster in the gauntlet battle: Morgan Freeman VS Jesus Christ!

## Information on the Disser!

"Morgan Freeman (born June 1, 1937) is an American actor, film director, and film narrator. Freeman won an Academy Award in 2005 for Best Supporting Actor with Million Dollar Baby (2004), and he has received Oscar nominations for his performances in Street Smart (1987), Driving Miss Daisy (1989), The Shawshank Redemption (1994), and Invictus (2009). He has also won a Golden Globe Award and a Screen Actors Guild Award.

Freeman has appeared in many other box office hits, including Glory (1989), Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves (1991), Seven (1995), Deep Impact (1998), The Sum of All Fears (2002), Bruce Almighty (2003), The Dark Knight Trilogy (2005–2012), Wanted (2008), RED (2010), Now You See Me (2013), The Lego Movie (2014), and Lucy (2014). He rose to fame as part of the cast of the 1970's children's program The Electric Company. Noted for his deep voice,[4] Freeman has served as a narrator, commentator, and voice actor for numerous programs, series and television shows. He is ranked as the seventh-highest box office star since July 2019. He has a combined total box office gross of $4.57 billion, with an average of $71.5 million per film."

-*Morgan Freeman Wikipedia Article*

## Lyrics

### **Verse 1:**

I’m Morgan Freeman, I’m a god amongst people!

You’re just some maybe real guy, I’ll make you weeple!

Who even are you, you’re supposed to prevent evil?

Is that because you got stabbed in the medieval?

I’ll beat you in this battle, I’ll give you a toss!

Like how you were killed and put on a cross!

I don’t have a single problem about me!

You became famous for doing nothing!

So, I heard you came back from the dead…

3 day later. Ha, I bet you did!

### **Verse 2:**

Shut it, Jesus! It’s time to get serious!

Now time to shoot you and make you delirious!

Take that, now you’re just ashes and bones!

And I hate your guts, from your head to your cone!

### **Verse 3:**

What makes you think you can make me go down!

I’ll punch you straight up to funky town!

My sick disses will make you frown!

And I’ll punch you from funky town to Chinatow-

What the- Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!

### **Verse 4:**

Shut up, Satan! You can’t beat me!

Trying to cut off my head, that’s stupid of thee!

And my disses are juicier than my meat!

And it’s time to kill ya’, ya’ yeet!

...Where am I?
Guy Fieri

**Guy Fieri** battled Robert Irvine in Guy Fieri VS Robert Irvine!

## Information on the Disser!

"Guy Ramsay Fieri (US: /fiˈɛri/, Italian: [ˈfjɛːri]; né Ferry; born January 22, 1968) is an American restaurateur, author, game show host, and an Emmy Award winning television personality. He co-owns three restaurants in California, licenses his name to restaurants in New York City and Las Vegas, Nevada, and is known for hosting various television series on the Food Network. By mid-2010, the Food Network had made Fieri the "face of the network". In 2010, *The New York Times* reported that Fieri brought an "element of rowdy, mass-market culture to American food television", and that his "prime-time shows attract more male viewers than any others on the network"."

-*Guy Fieri Wikipedia Article*

## Lyrics

Welcome Irvine, to Flavor Town Market!

(Oh-) You always to fix restaurants, that’s great

But, You only got a 49% rate…

Of restaurants that become revived, that’s horrible!

And the way you act so serious, it’s adorable!

Also, are you jelly of my Camaro?

Yes I know it’s awesome, you can’t borrow!

Your leadership is more horrible than your performance of Triple G!

And you’ll never get your cruddy restaurant of Triple D!

I'm going to own this battle, like I own GGB!

Not to mention, your food tastes like PPP!
Tyler Joseph

**Tyler Joseph** battled Billie Eilish in Billie Eilish VS Tyler Joseph! He was later taken over by Blurryface in his 2nd verse!

## Information on the Disser!

"Tyler Robert Joseph (born December 1, 1988) is an American singer, songwriter, musician, rapper, and record producer. He is best known as the frontman for the musical duo Twenty One Pilots, alongside bandmate Josh Dun. Joseph was also a solo artist for some time, and released an album titled No Phun Intended in 2008. As a member of Twenty One Pilots he has been nominated for six Grammy Awards, of which he has won one."

-Tyler Joseph Wikipedia Article

## Lyrics

### **Verse 1:**

You might be popular, but you are hated by half of the world!

But, everyone loves me, my songs are constant gold!

I’m might not at the tip of my career, but at least it lasted a few years!

But, the very next year, you’ll career will be dead and you’ll cry down a tear

Because it’s not fair! You really are just an edgy teen!

Yeah your cool, in your dreams! You little drama queen!

Yeah my raps are mean, you must be Stressed Out!

You only time I listen to you is when I’m forced to listen to the Car Radio!

You’re songs aren’t deep, they’re basic!

It’s just edgy propaganda for emo teen girls, that’s sick!

You think you scare me with your heavydirtysoul?

You geek over girls geeking over you, you dyed troll!

### **Verse 2:**

Oh no the edge, it’s too much I can’t handle it!

You’re like a gender-swapped Criss Angel, but with even less talent. I can’t stand it!

But, I can pull through, I can take on your puny body with my hype!

You won’t get any boys, you’re not any guys type!

(*Blurryface then finishes the rest of his verse!)*
Barney Rubble

**Barney Rubble** rapped against Barney the Dinosaur in Barney Rubble VS Barney the Dinosaur!

## Information on the Disser!

"**Barney Rubble** is a fictional character who appears in the television animated series *The Flintstones*. He is the diminutive, blond-haired caveman husband of Betty Rubble and adoptive father of Bamm-Bamm Rubble. His best friend is his next door neighbor, Fred.

Barney's personality was based on that of Ed Norton on the 1950's television series *The Honeymooners*, played by Art Carney. Like Ralph Kramden on *The Honeymooners*, Fred was constantly on the lookout for get-rich-quick schemes, while Barney, like Norton, found life satisfactory as it was, but participated in said schemes because Fred was his friend. Usually after Fred had hatched one of his plans, Barney showed his agreement by laughing and saying, "uh hee hee hee... OK, Fred!" or "hee hee hee... whatever you say, Fred!"'

-*Barney Rubble Wikipedia Article*

## Lyrics

### **Verse 1:**

Haha Hehehe

It's Barney Rubble, back on the double.

And I'm gonna diss you, with my sick rap!

(Oh-) I'm gonna beat you like WAP WAP WAP!

While you're always going like fap fap fap.

I'll beat you in the day, i'll beat you in the night.

I'll beat ya' at the bay, i'll beat ya' in a fight.

Mr. Barney the Dinosaur, always hugging kids.

Telling 'em you love them, you're no special gem.

And stop being creepy, you're not being sneaky!

So go hide in a corner, this is your warner!

### **Verse 2:**

Barney, I've got one word for you...

Pedophile, now I've beaten you by a mile!

You can't catch me when you are in prison!

Now getting out is your only MISS-ion!

**MISSION FAILED**

## Scrapped Lyrics

### **Verse 1:**

Hello! Hehehe Haheheheheheho!

I'm Barney Rubble, I'm the best of the Barnies!

I'll beat your Dino bum, with a big B.B. Club!

Hahehehehehehehe, I'm the best barney!

Now let's go bowling, my buddy Fred's a professional!

And his split ball move, will be used, to split your balls!

### **Verse 2:**

Well hahaha, Stop messing around!

Let me pull out the big guns, like your actor does!

Well my show is known for being revolutionary, While your's unnecessary!

With only 3/10 on IMDb. Just give up now, like your show did, my treat!
Paul Blart

**Paul Blart** raps against Lawrence Daley in Lawrence Daley VS Paul Blart! Terry the FBI Agent also disses Paul as a third party!

## Information on the Disser!

"Paul Blart is a mall cop for the West Orange Pavilion Mall. He was played by Kevin James in Paul Blart: Mall Cop and Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2. He is the main protagonist of both films."

-*Paul Blart - Paul Blart Wiki*

## Lyrics

### **Verse 1:**

I'm Paul Blart: Mall Cop!

I’m afraid I’m gonna need you to stop!

Because I’m on a mission,

As your ugly face belongs in a prison!

I’m Paul Blart, and no I don’t smell like a fart!

On my segway I can go as fast as a freaking dart!

You don’t mess with me, you look like the Simpson, Bart!

And you suck at your job more than I do at mine! Ya’ tard!

I’m a cop, I take my job very serious!

You don’t know how glass works, ya’ delirious?

I’ll kick you in the kneecaps, for real!

And don’t even try, my balls are a hard as steel!

Okay fine, I’ll cut you a deal!

Get the heck out, and I’ll spare you, ya’ seal!

### **Verse 2:**

Oh Bloowey, I feel soooo freaking offended!

I hit your groin so hard, it’ll be bended!

I can win this battle without a care!

And I don’t suck nearly as much as that hair!

### **Verse 3:**

Oh shut it Larry, I’ll squish you like a berry!

And you just suck so much, you should be named Terry!
Ultra Mega Diss Tracks on the Cob Wiki

***Welcome to the OFFICIAL Ultra Mega Diss Tracks on the Cob Wiki!***
This is the home to all the info you have to know about **Ultra Mega Diss Tracks on the Cob** (UMDTOTC)! Enjoy your stay!

We're a collaborative community website that anyone, including you, can build and expand. Wikis like this one depend on readers getting involved and adding content. Click the "ADD NEW PAGE" or "EDIT" button at the top of any page to get started!

*Community Founders*: Write a good and paragraph-length description here about your topic. Let your readers know what your topic is about and add some general information about it. Then you should visit the admin dashboard for more tips.

## SEASONS

### **Ultra Mega Diss Tracks on the Cob BETA - Season 1**

1. Barney Rubble VS Barney the Dinosaur (Series Premiere)
2. Beau VS Ben Ravencroft
3. Arnold Schwarzenegger VS Danny Devito
4. Buzz Aldrin VS Buzz Lightyear (Half-Way Finale)
5. Pepsi Man VS Kool-Aid Man
6. Guy Fieri VS Robert Irvine
7. Charlie Bucket VS Charlie Brown
8. Morgan Freeman VS Jesus Christ (Season Finale)

### **Ultra Mega Diss Tracks on the Cob ALPHA - Season 2**

1. Lawrence Daley VS Paul Blart (Season Premiere)
2. Uncle Sam VS Captain America
3. Medusa VS Circe
4. Gumball & Darwin VS Sonic & Tails
5. Shigeru Miyamoto VS Notch (Half-Way Finale)
6. Billie Eilish VS Tyler Joseph
7. David Lynch VS David Firth
8. Frank Davies VS Dr. Frankenstein
9. Laurel & Hardy VS Andy Griffith & Barney Fife
10. Santa Claus VS Easter Bunny (Season Finale)

### **Off-season - Season 2.5**

1. Jake VS Obama
2. Chlorophyll VS Mitochondria
3. Oxygen VS Carbon Dioxide

### **Ultra Mega Diss Tracks on the Cob DEMO - Season 3**

1. Alien VS Predator (Season Premiere)
2. Amelia Earhart VS Neil Armstrong
3. Matt Shultz VS Laura Bell
4. Third Wave Feminist VS Incel
5. Boogeyman VS Bloody Mary
6. Target VS Walmart (Half-Way Finale)
7. Sylvester Stallone VS Arnold Schwarzenegger
8. DJ Lance Rock VS Steve
9. Patchy the Pirate VS Frenchy
10. Arthur Fleck (The Joker) VS Dr. Jekyll (Mr. Hyde)
11. Sal Fisher VS Mae Borowski
12. TBA (Season Finale)

*Need help building out this community?*

* Getting Started
* How to Contribute
* Managing your new community
* Guides
* All Help articles

You can also be part of the larger Fandom family of communities. Visit Fandom's Community Central!
Bobby Flay

**Bobby Flay** dissed Guy Fieri & Robert Irvine in the Battle Royale: Guy Fieri VS Robert Irvine!

## Information on the Disser!

"Robert William Flay (born December 10, 1964) is an American celebrity chef, restaurateur, and reality television personality. He is the owner and executive chef of several restaurants: Mesa Grill in Las Vegas and Nassau; Bar American in New York and at Mohegan Sun; Bobby Flay Steak in Atlantic City; Cato in New York, and Bobby's Burger Palace in 19 locations across 11 states.

Flay has hosted several Food Network television programs, appeared as a guest and hosted a number of specials on the network. Flay is also featured on the *Great Chefs* television series."

-*Bobby Flay Wikipedia Article*

## Lyrics

### **Verse:**

That rhyme doesn’t make any sense…

But it doesn’t really matter sense you only make a few cents!

I’m Bobby Flay! Bobby Slayed…

This battle! And I didn’t even start yet

You think you guys can win? Let’s make it a bet!

Sense I never lose, like on BBF!

Guy, You’re no Food Network God…

Especially with that body, have you seen my Bod?

Nobody knows you, and get rid of that tan!

Fool, you are over, you’ve been canned!

And you, Robert! You’re the strong serious guy

But, your critic skills could use some improvement, bye!

I’ve got a serious charm, to get all the girls!

I’ve won this round, all gather around!

### **During Duff Goldman's Verse:**

Fake raviolis from Bobby Flay!

As Beat Bobby Flay is totally fake, you got slayed!

Hey, I already used that rhyme-
Frank Davies

**Frank Davies** battles Dr. Frankenstein in Frank Davies VS Dr. Frankenstein! In the battle he is later replaced by the It's Alive Baby!

## Information on the Disser!

Leaving their son, Chris (Daniel Holzman), with a family friend (William Wellman Jr.), Frank (John P. Ryan) and Lenore Davis (Sharon Farrell) head to the hospital for the birth of their second child -- which turns out to be a mutant who kills many doctors and nurses as it escapes. Convinced his monstrous son must be destroyed, Frank ignores Lenore and Chris' pleas and tries to destroy the freakish progeny, unaware that the infant may be the blameless product of an experimental drug gone wrong.

## Lyrics

### **Verse 1:**

You try to fight me? I’ve won and we haven’t even fought!

I was just thinking about how much fear and pain you brought

To the town you freaking live in!

‘Cause after this battle you ain’t livin’!

Look at me! I’m more intimidating than you’ll ever be!

I cared for my child, you just burnt him like Fitzgerald, you see.

You’re so infamous you’re creation stole your own name!

You whole knew me for my child. I got more fame!

You stole people’s bodies and brains, that’s messed up!

Good thing I didn’t look at you to fast, I would’ve died, yup!

Look at you, you’re crazy! No joke.

I’m gonna win this battle harder than Igor got choked!

### **Verse 2:**

Oh my Christ, my baby it’s here- AGHH!

*(Frank is killed and replaced by It's Alive Baby for the rest of the battle!)*
Jeb

**Jeb** rapped alongside Notch and Dinnerbone against Shigeru Miyamoto in Shigeru Miyamoto VS Notch!

## Information on the Disser!

"Jeb used the Minecraft Wiki as Jeb mojang, where he was particularly active in the issue lists, which he sanctioned as the official place to report and discuss Minecraft bugs and annoyances before the introduction of the official bug tracker.

In April 2013, he was included in the annual TIME 100 list along with Notch. In May 2013, Jeb married Jenny Bergensten (née Thornell), a photographer. They had a son in 2015."

-Jeb Article on Minecraft Wiki

## Lyrics

*[Jeb is in Orange, Notch and Dinnerbone are in regular text!]*

### **During Notch's 2nd Verse:**

Quit complaining, my disses are top-Notch!

Your disses are like your games, completely botched!

I hate you as much as you’re hated by the web!

You are beat, but let me pass the mic to Jeb!

I’m a programmer, on the mic I go hammer!

Sure you created some famous games, but I couldn’t give a damner!

I’m a rainbow, I’m the pride of your famous guide:

“How to make the same game over and over, but still trash with team-carts and stride”!

You’ll never compare to me, Notch, or especially Daniel’s work!

And Triforce Heroes is filled with more filler than a Thanksgiving turk!

### **During Notch's 3rd Verse:**

Oh, I’m Dinnerbone, you eat alone!

I’m a super duper hacker a high tip of the cone!

While I’m upside down, giving high fives downtown!

You’re just an old guy who creepily never frowns!

I’m a clean British, to your Asian squinty eyes!

But, believe me I’m nice, it says it on the wiki, guys!

(Hey!) What does the Captain say?

Hey says don’t ruin your beloved characters with sh\*tty gameplay any day!

And believe me you should trust him, he’s one of my best pals!

We have sold billions of copies, we are so very well endowed!

(OH!) You’re nothing Miyamoto, you lost your fame 10 years ago!

Our only problem is boat glitches though!

Too bad your wife and son don’t do squat sh\*t!

While you’re programming complete trash, working with 8-bit video-bits!
Beau

**Beau** fought against Ben Ravencroft in Beau VS Ben Ravencroft!

## Information on the Disser!

"**Beau Neville** is a police detective who worked undercover as a gardener of Simone Lenoir and Lena Dupree's mansion, unaware that the culprits were right underneath his nose. While he was an instant suspect to Velma Dinkley and Fred Jones, Daphne Blake thought he was cute (much to Fred's jealousy).

While undercover, Beau acted very irritable, brutish, and very protective of his plants. These qualities made him a potential suspect for Velma and Fred. Whether or not this was just a cover, it is unknown. However, he was shown to have a softer side, enjoying poetry and even reciting a piece he'd composed to Velma. He also appeared to have some sense of humor, joking with Velma when they were captured. He was also brave, attempting to defend the others from the cat-creatures, trying to get Velma, Fred and Daphne down when they were levitated and saving Velma's life on one occasion (stopping her from falling into quicksand). Beau appeared to admire Velma and may have had romantic feelings for her, though this is never confirmed."

-*Beau Article (Scoobypedia)*

## Lyrics

### **Verse 1:**

My name is Beau!

And my burn's will hit ya' like a, Bow... and Arrow!

While I work everyday for the F.B.I...

You're just a grumpy little bad guy!

You died by being pulled in.

The most obvious villain since the pig, Napoleon!

### **Verse 2:**

Oh yes, your magical spells...

Which you stole from your dead relative from hell!

Pretty messed up, Oh well!

### **Verse 3:**

You dare diss my film, it's a classic!

Your film makes everyone sick!

"Oh, you look like a bull haha!"

Have you been drinking? Like "Hick hick!"

Or are you just some massive prick!

Now get out, ya' filthy stick!
DJ Lance Rock VS Steve

**DJ Lance Rock VS Steve** is the 8th episode of UMDTOTC DEMO and is the 29th battle overall! It features DJ Lance Rock from Yo Gabba Gabba up against Steve, 1st host of Blue's Clues, in a battle of children's show hosts.

## Dissers

All played by Bob-crust!

* DJ Lance Rock
* Steve

## Lyrics

*[DJ Lance Rock is in Orange, Steve is in Green, and Blue is in Blue!]*

### **DJ Lance Rock - Verse 1:**

(Hahaha!) Here we go, Oscar! YO GABBA GABBA!

I play with toys, but I’m still more of a man than you, yo! (Oh!)

Look at me, I got swag! Here, there, everywhere!

I’ll take your little salt and pepper and spray on your nose, eyes, and basic-\*ss hair!

My name ain’t Joe, but I’m stealing the show!

No need to bring in a special guest, ‘cause I got the flow!

And I know how to flow, I’ve hung-out with Weird Al!

So, take out your sh\*t backgrounds and neil down into a bow!

Yo, I like to dance and fly, and I am quite fly!

Get rid of that nerdy-\*ss sweater, and look at me... My looks won’t be getting dry!

Your show is just sad, it makes me sadder than Gooble!

I’ve seen less cringe-worthy content on GoNoodle!

Wanna be child-friendly? How ‘bout you don’t, don’t, don’t make a character Slippery Soap!

I don’t need a teaching lesson to know that your rhymes aren’t dope!

### **Steve - Verse 1:**

Oh, hello. Hi out there, it’s me, Steve!

But, I gotta warn ya’, my raps are hot! So, you might wanna leave!

I’m charming and in my prime: the young Mr. Rogers!

And I’m gonna find a clue with Blue about how you’re silly at scoger!

(Woof!) You’re right Blue, with all that orange he looks quite dopey!

The only child teacher that rocks orange is the robot Moby!

You teach the obvious, I teach mystery and puzzle solving!

I make the first real difficult thinking skills in children start revolving!

(Oh!) Your little toys are wonky and have pretty stupid names to me!

A 3-year-old could come up with better names while taking a Toodee!

After this rap you’ll be rejected of having a home, just like Plex!

By the way, after watching my show, children passed every test! Not to flex!

### **DJ Lance Rock - Verse 2:**

Yo, that verse was terrible, but yes my lessons are simple!

But, the show is for tiny children that don’t know, ya’ ignorant bull!

You’re so full of yourself, but technically we all are because of our brains!

Except for the kids that watch show! Their brain’s drain like rain down a drain!

### **Steve - Verse 2:**

Others see a fluffy Cheeto, I see a dirty pedo!

Who locks these tiny kids inside a cage, who get only 20 minutes to play!

My voice makes its own percussion, (Woof!) you got nothing but nothing! (Woof!)

I’m shoving and tucking this wannabe Tony the Tiger until his hat’s just stuffing!

You were a bed-wetter, and it’s obvious that I’m better

Because I just got a letter, we just got a letter!

We just got a letter, it says I kicked you \*ss!
David Lynch

**David Lynch** battled David Firth in David Lynch VS David Firth!

## Information on the Disser!

"David Keith Lynch (born January 20, 1946) is an American filmmaker, painter, musician, actor, and photographer. He is best known for films such as Eraserhead (1977), Blue Velvet (1986) and Mulholland Drive (2001), often regarded by critics as among the best films of their respective decades, and for his successful 1990–91 television series Twin Peaks, which led to him being labeled "the first popular Surrealist" by noted film critic Pauline Kael. A recipient of an Academy Honorary Award in 2019, he has received three Academy Award nominations for Best Director, and has won France's César Award for Best Foreign Film twice, as well as the Palme d'Or at the Cannes Film Festival and a Golden Lion award for lifetime achievement at the Venice Film Festival. He has been described by The Guardian as "the most important director of this era", while AllMovie called him "the Renaissance man of modern American filmmaking"."

-David Lynch Wikipedia Article

## Lyrics

### **Verse 1:**

I was just reading this book. How are you doing, Megamind?

You’re illiterate sh\*t can’t compare to this kinda mind!

Sticking your Salad Fingers in some Fat Pie won’t make you a man!

You’re too immature. You look like an elephant, man!

Just some messed up crud isn’t horror, it’s immature!

Cause your craft crap is a mood, nothing more!

Your work is just ugly, I wish I could erase it from my head!

You’re life is just a Lost Highway leading to your death bed!

I’m milking this battle harder than you milked that Veggie guy!

You f\*ck nothing like rabbits, you’re a virgin, oh my!

Hey Toybox, you’re early cartoons are pretty much complete trash!

One million billiards is nothing compared to my 60 million net worth! CASH!

You got nothing, I got Twin Peaks!

The famous thing since SNL, you don’t even know what you seek!

Now “Get the stick! Get the stick!” and sober on it like some Blue Velvet cake!

Still don’t think I’m better? Here have this hot take!

You’re just Dune Lucky you even got noticed!

Your lifeless fake art is complete utter bogus!

I’m scary, I’m cool, you’re on your tippy-toes!

I’m Wild at Heart, I was meant to beat these tard types of foes!

### **Verse 2:**

More dark doesn’t mean more good, who wants to watch a Grandma getting chugged!

Even your comedy sucks! Jerry Jackson is like a bug.

I’ll squish 'em! With my famous masterpieces that even your papa knows!

Here’s a straight story! Get out or I'll shoot you with a blood-filled guarding hose!
Pepsi Man VS Kool-Aid Man

**Pepsi Man VS Kool-Aid Man** is the 5th Official episode of Ultra Mega Diss Tracks on the Cob! It features Pepsi Man and Kool-Aid Man in a battle of mascots for drink brands.

**Battle Length**: 1:08

## Dissers

Bob-Crust as both Pepsi Man & Kool-Aid Man!

## Lyrics

(Note: Pepsi Man is in Silver while Kool-Aid Man is in Red!)

### **Kool-Aid Man - Verse 1:**

OH YEAH! I’m the Kool-Aid Man!

And I’m much better than you, man!

I can break through all the freaking brick walls!

While you step over a manhole and fall!

You have only been in 13 Pepsi commercials

While I have been in them… ALL!

Pepsi sucks and you know it does

It hasn’t changed and it always was!

### **Pepsi Man - Verse 1:**

Pepsi Man here, to save the day!

Against this fat ton of lard, get out of my way!

I will save the day with my whimsical rhymes

And your drinks suck, they should cost a few dimes!

I will get what I know you have in mind

A can of Pepsi, it’s thirst-quenching time!

You can’t catch up to me with my super speed!

Your drink is almost as sticky as the silver I peed!

### **Kool-Aid Man - Verse 2:**

Eww, gross! Why would you think I want to know that?

That verse was like your freaking butt, flat!

The only thing going for you is your abs

But, you are so cringey, I bet you still dab!

### **Pepsi Man - Verse 2:**

I have a job, I deliver Pepsi for PepsiCo!

You just hang out with children, you gotta go!

And I love my abs, thanks for mentioning that

And I’m not really clumsy, that’s just an act!

### **Kool-Aid Man - Verse 3:**

Cool, Great, Amazing news!

That verse was almost as bad as the juice I ooze!

And yes I hang out with children, It’s an endless QnA!

Plus, I have a story about a rejected mascot… Upon A-

### **Pepsi Man - Verse 3:**

Sorry, gotta cut you off. I really gotta go!

But, I gotta question before I do though!

Is it true that your juice inside you is your life?

So, If I push you over it will be like stabbing you with a knife!
Robert Irvine

**Robert Irvine** battled Guy Fieri in Guy Fieri VS Robert Irvine!

## Information on the Disser!

"Robert Paul Irvine (born 24 September 1965) is an English celebrity chef and talk show host who has appeared on and hosted a variety of Food Network programs including *Dinner: Impossible*, *Worst Cooks in America*, *Restaurant: Impossible*, *A Hero's Welcome, Operation Restaurant, All-Star Academy, Guy's Grocery Games, Chopped: Impossible* and *Restaurant Express*.

Irvine currently operates one restaurant, entitled Robert Irvine's Public House, at the Tropicana resort in Las Vegas, Nevada. Irvine launched *The Robert Irvine Show*, a daytime talk show which aired weekdays on The CW between September 12, 2016 and May 25, 2018."

-*Robert Irvine Wikipedia Article*

## Lyrics

(Oh) Don’t try to mess with Robert Irvine!

You won’t be able to escape the pain, like you’re trapped in a vine!

Don’t try to mess with my amazing mind

I’m a food critic, you’re a food praiser!

While I shut down people’s food like a taser

You just eat it, you’re just a taster!

You going to a restaurant is just bragging rights!

While I go to failing restaurants, and make them right!

With your goatee and your bleached white hair…

Make me hurl, and regurgitate a pear!
Medusa

**Medusa** battle Circe in Medusa VS Circe!

## Information on the Disser!

"In Greek mythology, Medusa (/mɪˈdjuːzə, -sə/; Μέδουσα "guardian, protectress") was a monster, a Gorgon, generally described as a winged human female with living venomous snakes in place of hair. Those who gazed upon her face would turn to stone. Most sources describe her as the daughter of Phorcys and Ceto, though the author Hyginus makes her the daughter of Gorgon and Ceto. According to Hesiod and Aeschylus, she lived and died on an island named Sarpedon, somewhere near Cisthene. The 2nd-century BCE novelist Dionysios Skytobrachion puts her somewhere in Libya, where Herodotus had said the Berbers originated her myth, as part of their religion."

-Medusa Wikipedia Article

## Lyrics

### **Verse 1:**

I’m Medusa! When you Odyssey me, you’ll turn to stone!

You’re just a sl\*t, who attracts big men with your moan!

You turn people to animals, that’s pretty cute for a thot!

Your little Odysseus found another girl 40 minutes later, who would-a thought?

(Oh!) You turn the men to pigs and monkeys, what a useless power!

When you just stay up in your tower, while I stone guys every hour!

You can’t beat me, I’m a greek monster at high peak!

Everybody knows me, your just a god from a book that reeks!

### **Verse 2:**

Oh so you pulled them to eat them, oh I see alright!

But, was that for your hunger or for your sultry thirst? Come on, throw a fight!

Also, you’re a goddess, you don’t need to eat!

So, you really are just a jerky girl who wanted some man meat!

I don’t need a man, I’ve got sharp teeth, you’ve been beat!

I’ll grab ya’, and i’ll squeeze ya’, and i’ll bake ya’, like wheat!

Oh, come on! This doesn’t even seem like a fair fight!

A goddess against little ol’ me, you’ll at least need something to fight!
Barney the Dinosaur

**Barney the Dinosaur** rapped against Barney Rubble in Barney Rubble VS Barney the Dinosaur!

## Information on the Disser!

"Barney the Dinosaur is the main protagonist of Barney & Friends and a two hundred million year (two dinosaur years) old, six-foot tall, purple tyrannosaurus rex with a green belly and green spots on his back and his tail and yellow toes. He comes to life through a child's imagination. He is best known for his silly and optimistic attitude."

-*Barney the Dinosaur article (Barney Wiki)*

## Lyrics

### **Verse 1:**

"Warner" That's just an excuse to make a rhyme!

What's the point of rhyming when I can just diss you fine!

You just a little fool, with a creepy large laugh!

With a beautiful wife, who'll be in my bed tonight!

And I do love those kids, but it's not anything creepy.

You're just jelly that you'll be lonely...

Forever, and ever, and ever and ever!

With your big hairy feet and your big creepy nose;

That gives Squidward a challenge to his throne!

How 'bout you give up now, I don't care how!

JUST GET OUT!

### **Verse 2:**

Woah woah woah, you're going for the big shot I see,

But you still fall down to me (Hee hee)

So get out of here, I don't care if this rap sucks!

It's one sided but that's Rubble's fault!

Dislike the video and i'll put Rubble in my vault!

## Scrapped Lyrics

### **Verse 1:**

Ha- ha- hey kids! It's me!

Barney the Dinosaur, here to kill this cave guy!

I hate you, you love me, time to abuse your rump tonight!

With a BOOM BOOM HERE, and a BOOM BOOM THERE!

With a more annoying voice than Annoying Orange, there.

### **Verse 2:**

You don't say that stuff to a lovely dinosaur, that's abuse!

So let me teach you not to be rude, as you need a lesson!

Stop messing around, I'll kill your whole family!

And make a old fam-ca-bob. Then, I'll eat it in front of you!

And then I'll go for your job!
Nutzlose

Als Nutzlose werden inoffiziell diejenigen bezeichnet, deren Level einstellig ist. Offiziell werden sie von der Regierung als hilfsbedürftig eingestuft. Sie haben keine Privilegien und werden vom System grundsätzlich schlechter behandelt als andere. Nutzlose sind sozial isoliert. Freunde entfreunden sie auf Everybody aus Angst, dass das niedrige Level Auswirkungen auf sie selbst hat. Außerdem werden sie von Drohnen gebeten Pakete für ihre Nachbarn anzunehmen. In der Karte des Persönlichen Reiseführers sind Gebiete, in denen viele Nutzlose wohnen, rot gekennzeichnet, da diese zu meiden sind.