Business Opportunity

Space Tree buys the Space Captain's club for 2 million pizzolas. The Commander sings.

## Transcript

*(open to Space Tree's ship crashing into the Captain's club)*

**CHRISTOPHER 2:** Did you hear something, brother?

**CHRISTOPHER 1:** I thought I told you no talking.

*(Space Tree enters the club)*

**SPACE TREE:** (holding a board with a pie chart) Hey, guys. I'm glad I found you. I have an exciting business opportunity for you today! (throws the board away)

**CHRISTOPHER 1:** Oh, well, what a coincidence. I presented your mother's business opportunity last night!

**SPACE TREE:** ... What?

**CHRISTOPHER 1:** I dunno. He *[Christopher 2]* told me to say it. What do *you* want?

**SPACE TREE:** Well, I, Space Tree the Space Tree in Space, have recently come in possession of a huge load of dough, and I would like to blow my load all over your club.

**CHRISTOPHER 1:** Say what?

**SPACE TREE:** I wanna buy this Captain's club.

**CHRISTOPHER 2:** And you'll give us a load of dough? Where do I sign?

**SPACE TREE:** Well, I just happen to have the legal papers right here. *(throws papers on the bar table)*

**CHRISTOPHER 1:** Now, now, wait a minute. This all seems a little suspicious to me.

**SPACE TREE:** That's all right. I only need one half of you to sign. (hands a pen to Christopher 2)

*(Christopher 2 starts to sign the forms)*

**CHRISTOPHER 1:** Don't sign it, Christopher! No, don't! You right-handed son of a-

**CHRISTOPHER 2:** Too late!

*(he hands the forms to Space Tree)*

**CHRISTOPHER 1:** Oh... why does the dumb one get the writing hand? It makes no sense.

*(the Commander crashes through the window)*

**COMMANDER:** Don't you sign over those pizzas, Space Tree!

**CHRISTOPHER 1:** Pizzas?

**SPACE TREE:** *(now wearing sunglasses)* That's right, suckers! You just sold this big-ass Captain's club for a lousy 2 million pizzas, ha ha!

**CHRISTOPHER 1:** Really? Well, that's actually better than $2 million. There's a guy on the internet who'll pay us 10 bucks a pizza!

**SPACE TREE:** 10 bucks a pizza? That adds up to, like... 40 jillion dollars!

**CHRISTOPHER 1:** *(now wearing ST's "$" chain)* That's right, Space Tree, so, have fun with your new Captain's club that never even gets any friggin' customers! Ha ha... come on, Chris...

*(they leave)*

**COMMANDER:** You see what happened, Space Tree? If you'd listened to me, you would've heard I had the exact same idea to sell the pizzas and make a fortune.

**SPACE TREE:** Shut up. You just wanted them so you could build a pizza fort.

**COMMANDER:** Well, yeah, I did. Someday, though... someday... someday...

*(a tune starts playing in the background; fade up to the Commander's pizza fort)*

**COMMANDER:** *(singing)*

♫Pizza fort is where I'm gonna be the king of,

I just ordered a nice set of king gloves

Those are made of pizza as well

If you don't like that, go to pizza hell!♫

♫There's a pizza butler with a pizza hat

And my pizza cat is on his pizza mat

I will shake you down with my pizza bat

And all your second-rate forts, they will- ♫

*(cut back to reality; the Commander has been run over by the Christopher's car (and they now have the Lamp with them))*

**SPACE TREE:** *(holding a shotgun)* Oh, God, thank you.

**CHRISTOPHER 1:** No problem. And did I mention that this place has no insurance? So have fun fixing that hole I just made in the wall!

*(they drive off; we hear a crashing sound; the phone rings and Space Tree answers it)*

**CHRISTOPHER 1:** Ha ha, make that two! Click!

*(the phone hangs up)*

**SPACE TREE:** Ugh. I can't believe I traded a potential fortune for this friggin' dump. What the hell was I thinking? This is a dark day in Space Tree land, and I don't think anything can make it better.

*(cut to a bleeding Commander)*

**COMMANDER:** Oh, man, the Christopher's car crushed one of my vocal cords! I'll never be able to sing again!

**SPACE TREE:** But on the other hand, this is the best day ever!

*(roll end credits)*

## Easter Eggs

* Click on the pizza cat to change it into a white one doing the space dance.

## Fun Facts

* On the 9. November 2007, this episode (excluding the Christophers' first two lines and Space Tree's last line) can also be seen on the Splastik Player on the Keentoons Main Page, to promote Keentoons' plan to distribute their toons via mobile phones, as told in this Interview with Chris Crosby. However, this project now seems to be abandoned and the Splastik Player, including this episode was removed from the Main Page in 2008.
* The pie chart on the board Space Tree is holding says "green, orange, purple, red, blue, yellow".
* The pen Space tree gives to Christopher 2 is the one he got free with the Space Tree Action Figure in Ash Hole.
* It says **what** at one part.
* The Blue paper fort is the same one seen in Space Plans.
* See also: The Pizza Fort Song by the Commander.

## References

* The page title may refer to an episode of Everybody Loves Raymond, where Debra creates a pizza place mascot called "Professor Pete Zah".