Plingon

Commander Dwarf of P-Fleet, a Plingon

The **Plingons** are a militaristic humanoid race, one of P-Fleet's most well-known enemies.

## Biology and Appearance

Not much is known of the Plingons' biology. Their skin is presumed to be grayish or tan, and their hair - fair, black, or brown. It is impossible to tell exactly due to their cultural predisposition to not washing. Adult Plingons resemble heavy metal guitarists with the insides of fish glued to their foreheads. In reality, the riddges are a sign of maturity, and as soon as they begin to appear, Plingons let their hair grow long. Facial hair is common, and allowed even to younger individuals. Average height and weight are roughly the same as an average human's, if only a bit more.

Plingons wear leather outifts and metal armor. Baldrics, piercings, and earring are common.

## History

Nothing is known about the race's origins, but at some point, they became space-faring, and formed their empire after Kickass the Bloodthirsty began the conquest of what is now known as Plingon Space.

Some time prior to 2155, the Plingons allied themselves with the Romuclans and formed the Plingon-Romuclan Axis to fight the P-Community, in an event known as Space War III. Later, starting with 2194, the Plingons fought three more wars agains P-Republic, and fourteen wars against their former Romuclan allies. Starting with 2362, after yet another war, the Plingons entered an alliance with P-Republic, to fight the Romuclan Empire and their allies - the Greater Lardassian Nation. In 2366, the Plingons also begin a war for survival against the Korg Commune.

## Society and Culture

The Plingon Empire is a militaristic society, where the warrior profession is considered the most important, though not necessarily the most glamorous. For a yet undisclosed reason, Plingon warriors never shower, and as such, they always smell very bad. This is misunderstood by the other races that come into personal contact with them, and is sometimes the reason for conflict. Some Plingons also take up less militant professions, such as those of scientist, diplomat, and even grocery store merchant. Plingon k'rap is a popular music genre.

### The warrior's code

For Plingons, being a skilled warrior is paramount to anything else, therefore, asking for help during battle is seen as losing face. At the same time, abandoning one's comrades is seen as cowardly and those that do are mocked.

### Family and personal relationships

Homosexual love between warriors is considered the noblest form of love, far beyond love for family, Empire, or spouse. Marriages between warriors are looked down upon, as one spouse is expected to always remain home, and take care of the children.

### Religion

The Plingons believe in several gods of war and victory, but the supreme of them all is the First Plingon Emperor, Kickass the Bloodthirsty. Plingons believe their status in the Plingon afterlife is determined by the manner and time of their death, so, just like Kickass, they’re always looking for the best way, and the best day, to die.

## Government and politics

The Plingon state is an absolute, militaristic monarchy, led by an Emperor or Empress. As off 2375, Empress Gaylass XII the Short-Tempered is the ruling monarch.

### External policy

The Plingons have, on various occasions been at war, or in alliance with the P-Republic, the Romuclans, and the Lardassians. Since 2362, the Plingons are in a fragile alliance with the P-Republic against the Romuclans, having established a Neutral Zone between P-Republic space and Plingon space. Since 2366, they are also at war with the Korg.

## Military

The Plingon Empire is a space empire, and as such, the Imperial Fleet plays an important part in its military. The supreme military leader is the monarch.

### Navy

The Grand Boss acts as grand admiral, and is directly responsible before the supreme military leader. The Grand Boss commands the Ship Masters, who are basically the Plingon starship captains. The captains command the lower-ranking Plingon officers and warriors.

The navy includes such ship classes as the Plingon Prattlecruiser, Birdy, and Buzzard. These vary in size and strength. All ships are equipped with stashing gadgets.

### Army

The Plingon army consist mainly of infantry - warriors of different ranks. These are usually armed with Sado Swords and different kinds of Disturbers; officers also carry Pain Shields. Plingon metal armor is standard for all warriors.

### Specializations

Aside from the common warriors, some undergo special training. For example, Plingon Imperial Guards - whose main task is the protection of the monarch - are taught to hide an additional weapon on themselves, for any and all eventuality; whereas Plingon Scouts are taught to blend in with their environment, so much that it is next to impossible to find them on jungle planets.

## Technology and equipment

### Starships

* Plingon Prattlecruiser
* Plingon Birdy
* Plingon Buzzard

### Equipment

* Plingon stashing gadget

* Plingon disturber
* Plingon disturber rifle
* Plingon Sado Sword
* Plingon Pain Shield
* Plingon metal armor

## Seen In

* Star Wreck

* Star Wreck 2: The Old Shit

* Star Wreck IV: The Kilpailu

* Star Wreck 4½: Weak Performance (Commander Dwarf, mentioned only)

* Star Wreck V: Lost Contact

* Star Wreck: In the Pirkinning

* Star Wreck 2π: Full Twist, now!
* Star Wreck Roleplaying Game

## Behind the scenes

The Plingons are a parody of Star Trek's Klingons.

## References

1. ↑ 1.0 1.1 1.2 1.3 1.4 1.5 1.6 1.7 1.8 Star Wreck Roleplaying Game
2. ↑ 2.0 2.1 Star Wreck IV: The Kilpailu