Laurie Blake/Quotes

This page lists various things Laurie Blake has said.

"*Oli, could I just ask - what the fuck were you thinking with 'olden'?*"
―*Let's Play CODENAMES*

"*I've seen some pretty graceful olives.*"
―*Let's Play CODENAMES*

"*Oh good, the game doesn't end. Again.*"
―*UNO - Full Game w/ ALL The House Rules*

"*Annie Lennox wannabe... Bieber-looking bastard*" [about Adam]
―*Let's Play SAY ANYTHING*

"*I don't know much about Jersey, but I feel like it's outside.*"
―*Let's Play DREAM CRUSH*

"*What did I do to the whole fucking lot of you? Just making this shit run, is all. I'm deleting your audio, I'm deleting your audio, I'm deleting your audio...*"
―*Let's Play MEAN GIRLS: THE PARTY GAME*

"*It's been a great day? Two people are dead, Rosie!*"
―*I, Carley. I, Zombie*

"*I'm going to fucking kill you all.*"
―*Trouble With Violets*

"*This is a waste of 2 good socks.*" [on sock puppets Sullivan and Brooke]
―*Trouble With Violets*

"*We all listen to the fucking meta now don't we? Jesus Christ, you lot!*"
―*Trouble With Violets*

"*You don't know how much I want to fucking win... a real lot, I'm a very competitive person.* "
―*Let's Play WHITEHALL MYSTERY*

"*All nobles drink San Miguel from a can.* "
―*No Roles Barred*

"*We're never going to get less paranoid, just let it happen.* "
―*No Roles Barred*

"*WE'RE ON THE SAME TEAM ROSIE!* "
―*Let's Play MYSTERIUM*

"*You're the prom king at Moron High!* " [to Sullivan]
―*Let's Play MYSTERIUM*

"*You are kind. You are strong. You are important.* " [to Jon, as comfort]
―*Let's Play MYSTERIUM*

"*I'm going to mum the shit out of this apocalypse!*"
―*Let's Play DEAD OF WINTER*

"*Imagine zombies not being interested in eating you. Imagine being so desperate for their attention and they're just like - nah mate, you know what? You look like dog to us.*" [ on Adam]
―*Let's Play DEAD OF WINTER*

"*Sorry, are you on the moral high ground, just to clear things up?... you're all over the fucking place!*" [to Rosie]
―*Let's Play KING OF TOKYO*

"*Good luck using that [card] when you're dead, son.*" [to Adam]
―*Let's Play KING OF TOKYO*

"*I'm going to take my 2 victory points aaaaaand pretend you're not there, Rosie..*"
―*Let's Play KING OF TOKYO*

"*Oh, we just didn't listen to half the things you said, Laurie, it must be your fault. Fucking unblock your ears Gracey!*"
―*Let's Play MONSDRAWSITY*

"*Gingers don't have souls, Adam, so actually that's quite hurtful that you would bring that up.*"
―*Let's Play MONSDRAWSITY*

"*Kill me, jesus! What's a guy have to do to die around here?*"
―*We Are Legion*

"*Rosie - backstabber. Adam - got it out for me, that's an old grudge. Blair - evil. Sullivan - stupid, might blunder into it. Isaac - tactical and I'm a genius so he's obviously going to come after me. I'm screwed.*"
―*Let's Play CASH N GUNS*

"*Isaac, I'm going to kill everything you love, and then you. Starting with Sully.*"
―*Let's Play CASH N GUNS*

"*I'm really cross. It's not even funny how fucking cross I am.*" [Adam replied "I beg to differ."]
―*Let's Play CASH N GUNS*

"*No, because he's dead - with his humble art collection, that he had. A man of very humble means SHOT DOWN IN THE STREET FOR NO FUCKING REASON!*"
―*Let's Play CASH N GUNS*

"*What next in the litany of cucking for Jensen? Please, my dear council of bastards...*"
―*Let's Play FIASCO (Part 2)*

"*The thing about Adam is that Adam is an incredibly good player of games. He's got a good tactical mind. He's played a lot of board games. He's played a lot of Tsuro specifically. So,* can *Adam win a game of Tsuro? Yes.* Will *Adam win a game of Tsuro? Not on your life, not while I'm around.*"
―*Let's Play TSURO*

"*PLAY QUICKER! I CANNOT FEEL MY FINGERS!*"
―*Let's Play TSURO*

"*Written in blood is 'Laurie was right, you should always believe him.'*"
―*Popsicle Goes The Weasel*

"*I'm just here to watch you unravel, Jon.*"
―*Popsicle Goes The Weasel*

"*I skew evil.*"
―*Let's Play DON'T MESS WITH CTHULHU*

"*YOU ABSOLUTE PIT OF FUCKING VIPERS! GIVE YOU A FUCKING INCH AND YOU TAKE A MILE!*"
―*Let's Play DON'T MESS WITH CTHULHU*

"*I'm in your head you basic bitches!*"
―*Let's Play HERD MENTALITY*

"*Kill me Holly you coward! Put me out of my fucking misery! What kind of psychopath are you?*"
―*Poppygrown*

"*This is just fucking cruel ... AS IF THERE COULDN'T BE A GREATER INDIGNITY IN THIS GAME! AS IF MY FUCKING WIN RECORD SO FAR HASN'T ALREADY BEEN FUCKING BAD ENOUGH, I HAVE TO SIT HERE AND LISTEN TO YOU FUCKING BLATHER ON ABOUT HOW YOU'RE GOING TO WIN THE PERFECT GAME. FUCK THIS! FUCK THIS!*"
―*Poppygrown*

"*Let's just start firing and see how it shakes down!!*"
―*Let's Play GOOD COP BAD COP*

"*What part of 'stay out of F' did you people not understand? (to which Sullivan replies "The 'stay' and the 'out' and 'F' as well. We don't know words.")*"
―*Let's Play GOOD COP BAD COP*

"*I'm just waiting till you're all dead. Then I'll be the winner.*"
―*Let's Play SKULL II*

"*I bloody love dice and luck - fuck me, what a great game!*"
―*Let's Play CAMEL UP*

"*I will throw a game away, Brooke, on a slight.*"
―*Live and Imp-Person*

"*How fucking typical of this town to put me on the chopping block, not even out of spite, not even because it's good - just for utility! Kill me just for the fucking sake of it?! ... Yeah, fine, whatever.*"
―*Live and Imp-Person*

"*DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH MONEY I SPENT TO MAKE THIS?*"
―*Live and Imp-Person*

"*Revenge is a dish best served cold, some people say. But I don't mind it when it's served BOILING HOT!*"
―*Let's Play LIBERTALIA: WINDS OF GALECREST*

"*Honestly I love Neg Club. Great time, thanks for being here.*"
―*Let's Play LIBERTALIA: WINDS OF GALECREST*

"*You're toxic, Carley. You're toxic.*"
―*Let's Play LIBERTALIA: WINDS OF GALECREST*

"*I fucking* hope *I turn into a Thing!*"
―*Let's Play THE THING: INFECTION AT OUTPOST 31*

"*Do I want to tie Rosie up?*"
―*Let's Play THE THING: INFECTION AT OUTPOST 31*

"*Except for you three, you're not allowed on board!*" [in response to 'Get on Board!']
―*Let's Play THE THING: INFECTION AT OUTPOST 31*

"*I am the Hate and I have the power of rage!*"
―*Let's Play COSMIC ENCOUNTER II*

"*I don't know where this gaggle of cretins get off, saying that I resemble the Hate in any way, shape or form. I am a kind, loving, caring person who has many emotions outside of boiling hot rage. I really like cats. I really like flowers. I really enjoy the music of Robbie Williams. I am nothing like the Hate.*"
―*Let's Play COSMIC ENCOUNTER II*

"*Billy the Kid? You're Billy the Man now - and that man is very angry.*" [to Adam]
―*Let's Play WESTERN LEGENDS*

"*Four turns in and we're fucked..*"
―*Let's Play VAGRANTSONG*

"*I know you're crying, I know it's hard, but you've just got to for it.*" [to Claudia Winkleman]
―*Let's Play VAGRANTSONG*

"*I'll shit in every room of this building if you build on this... shit in every single room. And you'll never get the smell out...You'll have to change the windows... you'll have to install air conditioning. You're going to have to install Glade Touch and Fresh in every single room.* "
―*Let's Play THE ESTATES*

"*Vengeance feels so good.* "
―*Let's Play THE ESTATES*

"*Jon's just sailing around screaming 'I don't want to do this!* "
―*Let's Play JAMAICA*

"*Do I have a theme? ... I'm just sailing around the ocean having things taken from me, achieving fucking nothing. No I don't have a theme. I'm an aimless wanderer of the ocean at this point.* "
―*Let's Play JAMAICA*

"*That's the thing about grudges ... they never end. And if everyone at the table is dead, who gets to inherit the channel?* "
―*Let's Play TRIAL BY TROLLEY*

"*Lauries don't hibernate, FYI. If we did, we would choose summer.*"
―*Let's Play DECEPTION: MURDER IN HONG KONG III*

"*WHAT FUCKING RESTAURANT HAS OIL-SOAKED RAGS? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? TERRRRRRIIIII!.... I'm carving your name into this [bullet] Teri!*"
―*Let's Play DECEPTION: MURDER IN HONG KONG III*

"*Adam's baby voice is one of the worst things that has been committed to film.*"
―*Let's Play MUFFIN TIME*

"*No-one's ever targeted you, you're just bad at games!*" [to Adam]
―*Let's Play MUFFIN TIME*

"*That's muffinwang! That's muffin comma wang!*"
―*Let's Play MUFFIN TIME*

"*He wouldn't know a win if it bit him on the dick.*" [on Adam]
―*Let's Play MUFFIN TIME*

"*Be woke! Give a sloth a poke!*"
―*Let's Play WAVELENGTH IIII*

"*I just want to stop talking about this*" [on sexy animals]
―*Let's Play WAVELENGTH IIII*

"*I think it's pathetic you've had to cast us all as Nazis to get this episode's slight hero rub.*" [to Adam]
―*Let's Play SNIPER ELITE: THE BOARD GAME*

"*I hope you all fucking perish! (to which Sullivan replied, 'that's fair.')*"
―*Let's Play MOONRAKERS*

"*I WON! I FUCKING WON! I FUCKING WON! NONE OF YOU DID THAT, THAT WAS JUST ME! I DID THAT ALL ON MY OWN! NONE OF YOU FUCKING HELPED! I DID THAT! THAT WAS ME!*"
―*Ding Dom Merrily On High*

"*In space, no-one has seen my peen.*"
―*Let's Play ISS VANGUARD*

"*Why are you specifically dicking me over? Why specifically me?*"
―*Let's Play ZOO VADIS*

"*I'm losing my fucking mind over here!*"
―*Let's Play CATAN*

"*HOW DARE YOU BREAK DOWN PO JUST TO HIS JOB. HE LIKES BEING CALLED THE DRAGON WARRIOR. HE DIDN'T FUCKING FIGHT HIS WAY THROUGH THE FURIOUS FIVE TO BE CALLED KUNG FU PANDA, DID HE? HE'S THE FUCKING DRAGON WARRIOR! HE'S GOT A SPECIAL SCROLL THAT HE GOT FROM MASTER SHIFU!*"
―*Let's Play TAKENOKO*

"*The old bamboo, the old bamboo - you never fuck a panda with the old bamboo!*"
―*Let's Play TAKENOKO*

"*Oh fucking fuckity fuck. Oh fucking pissy little fucking fuck. Shitty fucking bullshit fucking, fucking...*"
―*Let's Play WHAT NEXT?*

"*He's done it for Britain. Britain, never call on me again because I won't fucking answer.*"
―*Let's Play WHAT NEXT?*

"*Sullivan, we need to be respectful around the tower!*" [to Adam]
―*Let's Play WHAT NEXT?*

"*Don't do that face at me!*" [to Adam]
―*Let's Play WHAT NEXT?*

"*HOW AM I THE ONLY ONE THAT'S DONE ANYTHING? I'VE GOT ONE BOOK AND I'M ALIVE! FUCKING MORONS! FUCKING IDIOTS! BUMBLING ABOUT, TOUCHING EACH OTHER UP AND DYING!*"
―*Let's Play AMONG CULTISTS*

"*Are we sure I'm role playing?*"
―*Let's Play THE SHIVERS*

"*What's that, dog? You think we should close the borders?*"
―*Let's Play THE SHIVERS*

"*That's why I married him - petty revenge! That's what I like.*" [on Ivan]
―*Let's Play SALEM 1692*

"*I curse him to the day I die! I'm not a witch, I just hate him.*" [on Ivan]
―*Let's Play SALEM 1692*

"*I'll just start flinging shit, innit?*"
―*Let's Play SALEM 1692*

"*LAURIE ALWAYS WINS? LAURIE? ALWAYS? THE FUCK ARE YOU ON ABOUT?*"
―*Let's Play SALEM 1692*

"*Would you like me to read it? I've at least had* some *training.*" [to a muted Holly]
―*Let's Play BANK HEIST*

"*I've written 'bums' - is that funny?*"
―*Let's Play SAY ANYTHING II*

"*I've written an essay - I had a lot of feelings about this.*"
―*Let's Play SAY ANYTHING II*

"*Why would I want to kill my demon?*" [repeatedly, as the Vizier]
―*A Magic, Grand Vizier*

"*Can I drive? No I can't drive. But I know this about women - they're worse drivers than I.*"
―*Let's Play FAST & FURIOUS: HIGHWAY HEIST*

"*How does it feel to be the main character? You shouldn't ask a narcissist that, should you? How do you think I feel all days? I'm so fucking good.*"
―*Let's Play FAST & FURIOUS: HIGHWAY HEIST*

"*It's a lot of things to put in your brain.*"
―*Let's Play MYTHIC MISCHIEF*

"*Fuck the books, man.*"
―*Let's Play MYTHIC MISCHIEF*

"*I really like people - I just don't want to talk to them all the time.*"
―*Let's Play FUN FACTS*

"*Holly, why don't you hold your breath for as long as possible?*"
―*Let's Play FUN FACTS*

"*This fucking Isle of Doctor Moreau monstrosity you've done is somewhere between lizard and dog...*" [to Jon]
―*Let's Play PICTURES*

"*The electric powered lizard of death...*"
―*Let's Play PICTURES*

"*IYou know I'll crumble to peer pressure!*"
―*Let's Play GOOD FACE BAD FACE*

"*WE DON'T KNOW, WE DIDN'T GOOGLE IT! WE WERE TOO BUSY TRYING TO PUT A BRICK ON A MAN! TRYING TO PUT A BRICK ON A MAN AND YOU'RE JUST WHISPERING NONSENSE! NONSENSE! I AT LEAST HAD A SAFETY CERTIFICATE, DOM!*"
―*Let's Play MEN AT WORK*

"*But at night the book calls my name. It says: 'Read me. Take a name. Walk out into the night, walk down the street, walk for hours. Bloody, bare feet padding on the pavement. A squelch outside the window. Hot breath on cold glass as I peel it open... and then back to sleep.*"
―*Let's Play BLOCK PARTY*
> *“That’s like the Matrix for peas!”*
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