Nami

—**Bill Bone**, in his genius.

**Nami the Orcadragon** is a killer whale mixed with a bipedal dragon-thingy. She's one of the nicest people on Earth, donating money to charities (of differing degrees of corruption and pointlessness) and helping homeless people. She's had many jobs that help people emotionally, like being a therapist, a teacher, a pastor, and many others. She's also not so smart (in terms of finding relationships), having relationships with bad guys like Duff McWhalen and Lefte.

She's also a Communist (more a Socialist because she isn't that stupid) who sometimes gets into governments around the world and starts making social policies like free healthcare and income-based taxes and stuff. She's a member of *The* *Whale-Wise Livyatans* and the only good person in that gang.

## Early Life

### Before Nami

For some reason, a light orange girl dragon thing made a baby with a random orca in the Arctic Ocean. "How is a dragon on Earth?" you might ask, and the answer is that Nami's mother is a space dragon-y thing. There are more important questions that can be answered but those don't matter and will never matter.

### Nami Is Born

In the Baltic Sea, under a bunch of sand, Nami hatches from a yellow egg. Being under a bunch of sand and not wanting to die, she ate her way out of the soon-to-be coffin. This caused her stomach so much pain that she still remembers this as the reason why she hates sand.

A few years later, Nami is discovered by two Polish scientists in the Baltic Sea. These two scientists were perplexed that they have just discovered a humanoid fishy thing. They take her to their lab in Darłowo and they realize that she is trying to mimic their language. With this information, they thought that they could teach her stuff. They taught her math and science and other boring stuff learned in school to the best of their ability. Nami gained a stunted reading comprehension, but she was good at calculus and remembering science facts about animal cells and spotting plants with specific diseases and other useless crap.

## Post-Polish Possession

The two Polish scientists decided to finally reveal their discovery of a new species to the global community of biologists by sending confidential letters to them that described the new species as a human-like, sapient water creature with thumb-having bear paws and a tail that looks like an orca. Scientists from America, Britain, France Germany, and Japan (5 of the 12 countries asked, 9 scientists from the 37 letters sent) were the only ones who could afford the $7 trip to Darłowo and risk going to Poland.

### Science Meeting

During the secret meeting, the scientists agreed to officially call her class *Miria*, meaning "mystery," and her species *Mirnami sapiens*, meaning "wise mystery wave." Don't ask why they used a Japanese word in the genus name. The two Polish scientists shared their less-than-good (Polish) quality brain scans and x-rays, saying that they needed higher (Not Polish) quality images. The Japanese scientists agreed to do the high-quality brain scans and x-rays and other neurological things since they had the best technology in the world. Everyone agreed that the other countries were going to partially pay for the testing of Nami.

## In Japan

In a government facility, the Japanese scientists created high quality brain scans and x-rays and mailed them to the participating scientists of the other countries. Living in Japan, the doctors had to work 51 hours a week in order to get paid and they vented this frustration out loud, as to which Nami gave advice to the doctors, in Polish, as to how they can make work less painful, not that she knows anything about working 51 hours every week, or working in general, but at least she tried to help them. Soon, the biologists and neurologists began to talk about more personal stuff, like family, which eventually led to them confiding with Nami, often, about their inner struggles, helping them not end it all.

One day, one of Nami's scientist friends brought a bread sandwich for lunch. Not wanting to see her scientist friend like this, she walked out of the lab, went to the capitol building of Japan, and listed off the things that needed to be changed, to the Prime Minister of Japan, so that her scientist friend and every other scientist in Japan could have a real lunch instead of a bread sandwich. This event obviously revealed Nami to the world and, trying to carpe diem, the two Polish scientists, expecting praise and money, revealed that they were the ones who discovered the humanoid water thing, but nobody cared about them; they cared about the walking, talking fishy thingy.

Since the secret was out, the scientists let Nami do her own thing while occasionally requesting her to let them study her.

## Things She's Done

### In Countries

* She made every first world country have free healthcare, even in the United States, but it was very hard to do though.
* She finally got the United States to pass the Equal Rights Amendment, after it being just a principle for over a hundred years, it is now a document of importance and the law.
* She made homelessness "illegal" by making it so that governments have to put homeless people in a place and help them get a job.
* She made all recreational drugs illegal except caffeine and alcohol.
* She made every first world country make it illegal to have more than 40-hour work weeks.

### In Counties

* She's been a therapist in places all over the world, with a success rate of getting people out of depression at 100%, like, just looking at her can make someone stop being in a sadness episode.
* She's been a math and science teacher and a counselor for schools all over the world. She can make a school's atmosphere improve by at least 50% and at most 7000%. Teen suicide was reduced by 60% because of her.
* Being a good Christian (who wears skimpy as heck clothing and thigh-highs), she goes to churches everywhere to preach the goodness of the Lawd and Jesus Christ and tell the church goers to be good like Jesus.

## She's So Nice, Really Nice, Too Nice

Nami is one of the nicest persons in the world. Unfortunately, bad guys will use this to manipulate her into helping them reach an evil goal easier, since she can't really detect manipulation despite having average intelligence.

For example, in her previous relationship with Lefte, Nami thought that Lefte was running a Freddy Fazbear's location in order to make children and adults, alike, end the day with smiles on their faces, but it was really a facade made by Lefte that was to support her sadistic and murderous urges.

### The Livyatan Therapist

Nami is a member of *The Whale-Wise Livyatans*, being Duff McWhalen's girlfriend and all, but she is the only who hasn't killed anyone, directly, at least. Nami never does any of the fighting since the other members always convince her that they're just going for a swim. When she's not being lied to, she's usually taking care of the headquarters, making it look good with a garden, and giving words of support and encouragement to the other members.

## All In All

Nami is a great person who is easily manipulated by others. Also, she increases the tax-rate to 99.99% of your income! 😭

~~And she's fricking thick with like 4Ks.~~