2003 Calladega 500

The 2003 Calladega 500 was the 22nd race. It was best known for only 13 racers finishing. Those racers were winner Ruby Oaks, The King in 2nd, Lee Revkins in 3rd, rookie Aiken Axler in 4th, Rusty Cornfuel in 5th, Brush Curber in 6th, Chick Hicks in 7th, Kevin Racingtire in 8th, Dale Earnhardt Jr. in 9th, Ernie Gearson in 10th, Dirkson D'agostino in 11th, Chuck Armstrong in 12th and James Cleanair in 13th.

The reason due to this is there was a gigantic crash on lap 101 involving the entire field (except for Haul Inngas who punctured his tire on lap 75, Darren Leadfoot who crashed on lap 24 and Misti Motorkrass who crashed on lap 3).

This was due to an incident when Ralph Carlow's tire got caught in a string,He tried to push through it but the string launched him back and he was flying into the other cars. He then landed directly on Davey Apex crushing the helpless Revolting racer like a bug. The now flattened Davey barely moved his nearly flat body(which was leaking oil) to the grass. Meanwhile Ralph collected Greg and Winford. The crash then collects more and more racers. Kevin Shiftright bursts his tire on a debris belonging to Eugene. A piece of debris hits the grandstands and hits a fan. Johnny gets bad damage as he always does while Murray goes flying in the air and lands beyond the inside wall and pit(in the inner area).

Davey was replaced by Bashman for the next four races before returning for the 2003 No Stall 350.

## Trivia

1. Todd's curse word censored by Popeye's Sailor Pipe before "BIG CRASH AHEAD, GUYS!" was bad word number 11.

## Transcript

### Big Crash

Ralph: Help! I can't move!

Lil Torquey Pistons Crew Chief: You caught your tire on your string wait and we will get it out

Ralph: I'll push and break free!

Bob: Oh no, Ralph is stuck!

Darrell: I think he will break through this.

Ralph: Help. I can feel my whole body stretching out!

(Ralph then goes flying in the air)

Ralph: Ahhhhhhhhh!

Davey: OH GOD! O-

(Davey gets flattened)

Todd: HOLY (Popeye toot)!! BIG CRASH AHEAD GUYS! I SEE RALPH, GREG, WINFORD AND A BUG!

Eugene: Actually that looks like Davey Apex...

Todd: HOLY (Popeye toot)! How did a come for THAAAAAT!!

(more cars involved)

Bob: I DON'T BELIEVE THIS! THAT'S LIKE 25 CARS IN THAT ONE! AND ONE BUG!

Darrell: Actually that is-

Bob: YEAH I KNOW I KNOW! I WAS TRYING TO BE FUNNY!

Darrell: I DON'T BELIEVE THIS! THIS IS HUGE!

(Later)

Kori: Revolting Crew Chief, what do you think of your racer getting flattened like a bug by Ralph.

Revolting Crew Chief: I just don't believe it. I'm speechless. Davey is probably never gonna come back and Ill have to find someone new.

Kori: Okay, thanks. That was a crazy crash all caused by Ralph Carlow getting way too cocky! Back to you Bob, Kori Turbowitz here.

Bob: I know this is such a horrible crash and poor Davey Apex has seen better days that's for sure!

Darrell: I know! Dave is currently taken to the hospital where he hopefully recovers.

(Note: Davey returned 4 races later but was replaced by Bashman)

### RUBY EASY OAKS WINS!!!!

Bob: THIS IS IT! THIS IS IT! RUBY IS GONNA WIN THE CALLADEGA 500!!!

Spike: YES! OUR GOD!

Pinkie: SO (Seal Bark) AWESOME!!! THE CENSOR SOUND! BARK BARK BARK BARK!!!!!

Spike: HE WINS CALLADEGA!!!!!! WOO WOO WOO WOO!!!!!!!!

Darrell: RUBY EASY OAKS WINS!!!!!!

## Results

1. Ruby Oaks - 200 laps

2. The King - 200 laps

3. Lee Revkins - 200 laps

4. Aiken Axler - 200 laps

5. Rusty Cornfuel - 200 laps

6. Brush Curber - 200 laps

7. Chick Hicks - 200 laps

8. Kevin Racingtire - 200 laps

9. Dale Earnhardt Jr - 200 laps

10. Ernie Gearson - 200 laps

11. Dirkson D'agostino - 200 laps

12. Chuck Armstrong - 200 laps

13. James Cleanair - 200 laps

to be continued by winner of this race Ruby Easy Oaks