How not to fucking die by magic

**Author: Jonathan Killinger**

## Foreword:

If you are reading this then you have decided that dying sucks and you want to live long enough to see the end goals of your magical journey, it also means, you really don’t care who teaches you to survive even someone disliked by the magical councils and the higher ups in the societies. Well I won’t lie I wrote this book less to show off my writing skills or be an academic and more as a little joke to see if this gets into the magical academic space, if it has then imagine me smiling right now. Back to the main point I have encountered some insane, power and/or cunning creatures in my life as a mage and using these tricks I shall mention in this book you might have better odds in your journey or at least go out in a blaze of glory. Good fucking luck mate.

## Chapter 1: the most important trick

I decided that if you are gonna learn one thing in this book it might as well be this so I mentioned it first as it is the one thing that has saved my ass on multiple occasions. Of all the tricks and tools you have, use your imagination! Your imagination is the most powerful tool you have as a mage/wizard/sorcerer/ect and using it you can beat some of the most powerful foes or make up some insane spells. With imagination you can find a counter to spell, get out of some tight binds or get the better end of a deal. Never be afraid to think outside the box cause the box is fucking restrictive, stupid and like the how I came out of the closet a whole lot better.

## Chapter 2: don’t be an arrogant dickhead

What is the common trait that almost everyone I have outsmarted, outcast and beaten had? They were all arrogant fucks who thought they were the god of magic and no one can touch them. Like nothing wrong with a little ego, we gotta have that confidence in ourselves but don’t start acting like cause you know magic you are now the best thing since oral sex. Everyone i’ve met who has been like this has often been way weaker than they say and you can kill yourself by jumping off their ego to their intelligences. If you need to boast that you are powerful then most likely you are weak as fuck and yell to make up for it. Arrogant people often use magic they don't understand leading to screw ups or overcasting the spell hurting themselves. The best way to exploit these people is let the keep underestimating you, the more they do and the longer the better for you cause then they will fuck up more and you can fuck them up in return. So remember, don’t be fucking arrogant and getting yourself killed cause of it, be humble.

## Chapter 3: shortcuts actually fucking suck

So yes there are shortcuts and deals you can take for powerful and strong magic to fast track it but like a pyramid scheme or a timeshare it is a massive fucking scam. Often these deals come from sinister creatures that want to dope stupid casters into these deals who don’t read the finer print and often get screwed out of their soul or find out their power was just to use them as a tool. It is a lot of work and effort to get powerful or even good at magic, hell it might even be painful to do so, but it means you won’t be a slave to someone who only sees you as a disposable pawn. If I turn down a high paying corporate lawyer job than you can do the same but in demon contract form.

## Chapter 4: you might suck at some stuff, that’s ok

I am gonna have to be the one to tell you this, you aren’t gonna master all forms of magic and in fact some magic you are just gonna suck at, know what that’s ok. That also includes me, I have magic I suck at as well, I am terrible at making elemental attacking spells compared to my fate magic, mind magic, illusions and death magic but when you view magic as less one road and more a destination of many paths you don't need to know all magic. Don’t worry too much that you might be bad at combat, charming people or any other magic you can think of, you might be amazing at other stuff and you can probably think of a use in any situation.

## Chapter 5: if you think it is above your paygrade, probably is

At some point you might come up to something or someone and might go ‘wait I think this might be too powerful for me’ and guess what you are probably right it is. Now it happens to all of us at some point. Maybe it is a powerful mage, an ancient vampire or hell, even a god you are gonna meet someone more powerful than you. Now this is most likely a gut feeling you will have to trust it. Now don’t be too scared, just cause they are powerful doesn't mean they are unbeatable. Just refer back to chapter 1 if you are wondering what to do when that moment happens.