Minor Characters

The characters listed here are all either voiced characters with very small roles or characters that are only ever mentioned.

## Sean

**Played by:** Newton Schottelkotte

**Episode:** Episode Two: Flight of the Amphibians

Sean is an employee at the supply depot on Pslam Street in Jerusalem.

## Baby Lamb

**Played by:** Newton Schottelkotte

**Episode:** Episode Two: Flight of the Amphibians

To drive away a plague of frogs, Ed decides they need to slaughter a baby lamb and paint its blood on the doorways of the town. Before being slain, the lamb tells Ed it is not her time yet.

## Unknown Creature

**Played by:** Newton Schottelkotte

**Episode:** Episode Three: Hog Wild

An unknown creature that was killing Thomas Lincoln's show pigs. It was large, had huge claws, and had a deep growl. Ed saw it the night she went to watch the pigpen. It noticed her and pinned her to the ground and told her "It is not your time yet." Lincoln scared it off with a gunshot. It seems to be one of the Lions guarding the crater.

## Ruhi Shirvan

**Episodes:** Episode Three: Hog Wild (Mentioned), Episode Twenty-Three: And the Prom Is Tomorrow (Mentioned)

Ruhi Shirvan is the mother of Sufi Shirvan, Huma Quince, Abby Lincoln, and Theo Lincoln. Sufi and Huma are from a previous marriage to an unknown man while Abby and Theo are from her current marriage to Thomas Lincoln.

After moving back to town after having had Sufi and Huma, Thomas saw her out shopping and asked her out to dinner. Ruhi is a practicing Muslim and works to keep halal despite the slim offerings of Jerusalem. She runs a gardening shop in downtown.

## Principal Golem

**Episode:** Episode Five: Glossophobia (Mentioned)

Principal Golem is the principal of Jerusalem High School. His presence is only known as a caller on the other end of a phone conversation with Lucy as he tries to get her to come speak at a school assemply about her career as a writer.

## Vice Principal Sier

**Played by:** Cherish Dean

**Episode:** Episode Five: Glossophobia

Sier is the vice principal of Jerusalem High School. She is very professional and able to keep Ed and Lucy in check with just a few words and a stern look. In *Glossophobia*, she is responsible for showing the assembly speakers to their waiting room and managing their time on stage.

## Student A

**Played by:** Eva Buergler

**Episode:** Episode Five: Glossophobia

A student, known as Student A in the *Glossophobia* script, who is at the Jerusalem High School career assembly. They inturrupt Ed's speech to clarify what she means when she let slip a mention of monsters.

## Student B

**Played by:** Newton Sweeney

**Episode:** Episode Five: Glossophobia

A student, known as Student B in the *Glossophobia* script, who is at the Jerusalem High School career assembly. They jump in after Student A's comment to ask about werewolves and angels.

## Linus's Daughter

**Episodes:** Episode Six: Tinfoil Isn't Your Color, Minisode Two: Full Pod

Linus's Daughter is a cicada wrapped in a cocoon that resides in a room in his house. She does not speak, instead being "voiced" by stock cricket chirps whenever she would speak. She has previously killed Mormons, presumably before going into her chrysalis form. Per the minisode *Full Pod*, which takes place before Episode Six, she states wants to be allowed to go to school and play baseball but Linus won't let her until she hatches from her cocoon in the spring. Whether or not these conversations are legitimate, possibly telepathic, or just Linus being the insane father he is is unclear. In Episode Six, Ed discovers her room in Linus's house, which prompts Linus to attack his would be prey. However, Lucille arrives to save her and the two set fire to Linus's house. It is presumed Linus's Daughter was burned away as well.

## Philippa Coolidge

**Played by:** Artemis Zara Gültekin

**Episodes:** Episode Seven: All Fights Reserved, Episode Seventeen: Dear Listener (Inaudible)

Lucy's agent and her go-between for the writer and her editor, publisher, and anyone else involved with her books. She is able to keep Lucy's bull-headed nature in check, doing her best to help Lucy's books be the best than can, much to Lucy's chagrin.

In *All Fights Reserved*, she is giving Lucy the feedback from Machavich about his read on the drugs used in Lucy's most recent drft.

In *Dear Listener*, she is arguing with Lucy over the audiobooks that are being produced, in which Lucy has a laundry list of things that she wants satisfied and Phil is working hard to get her to make compromises.

## Machavich

**Episodes:** Episode Seven: All Fights Reserved (Mentioned)

Lucy's editor. He gets on her bad side, indirectly, when he runs requests for changes through Philippa for Lucy's book, suggesting her fantasy drugs are not grounded enough in reality. He lives in the Eastern Time Zone.

## Monica

**Episode:** Minisode One: Romancing the Stone

Monica is the sister of Dr. Russel Stone. She is unheard on the other end of a phone call where she is optimistically telling him to go after Molly Dane romantically.

## Laura Abraham

**Played by:** Newton Schottelkotte

**Episode:** Minisode One: Romancing the Stone

Laura calls the Jerusalem Hospital, wanting to know what over the counter medication she can give her son for a fever. Unfortunately, she calls in the middles of a tense will-they-won't-they moment between Molly Dane and Dr. Russel Stone. Molly, thinking it is once again Lucy or Ed calling with an emergency, launches a verbal assault on the poor, unsuspecting woman. Embarassed, Molly hand the phone to Dr. Stone.

## Radio Host

**Played by:** Tal Minear
**Episode:** Episode Ten: Happy Birthday Edison

A radio host advertising Golden Creek’s annual Festival of Holiday Lights in Baker County.

## Dr. Gutiérrez

**Played by:** Leslie Gideon

**Episode:** Minisode Three: Plan B(affle)

One of Ed's colleagues at Stanford University. They on the phone, catching up with Ed, commiserating about fraternities. Gutiérrez then brings up Ed's lack of reports back to the university and convinces her to get to writing up a report to send.

## Mr. Barnabas

**Played by:** Newton Schottelkotte

**Episode:** Episode Sixteen: Shir-lock Holmes

## Demon

**Played by:** Aidan Mecchi

**Episode:** Episode Sixteen: Shir-lock Holmes

## Shopper

**Played by:** Artemis Zara Gültekin

**Episode:** Episode Eighteen: T'Shuva

A random shopper in Trader Joe's that pulls Ed out of a panic-induced daze when she informed Ed she is blocking the aisle.

## Barista

**Played by:** Jade Duong

**Episode:** Episode Nineteen: Don't Burn Down the House

## Anthony Roy

**Played by:** Josh Rubino

**Episode:** Episode Nineteen: Don't Burn Down the House

## Maya

**Played by:** Liz Morey

**Episode:** Episode Nineteen: Don't Burn Down the House

## Mary

**Played by:** ItMe!

**Episode:** Holiday Special: The Christmas Chronicle (or, Whose Lie Is It Anyway?)

## Shepherd 1

**Played by:** Tom Moorman

**Episode:** Holiday Special: The Christmas Chronicle (or, Whose Lie Is It Anyway?)

## Shepherd 2

**Played by:** Josh Rubino

**Episode:** Holiday Special: The Christmas Chronicle (or, Whose Lie Is It Anyway?)

## Barista (Seen and Not Heard)

**Played by:** Ella Watts

**Episode:** Seen and Not Heard Crossover: Two Jews In A Room Signing

A barista at a Jewish deli where Lucy is meeting Bet. They speak the only line in the Seen and Not Heard crossover, calling the ticket for Bet's order.

## Florence

**Played by:** ItMe

**Episode:** Episode Twenty-Four: Something Other Than the Desperation

Florence is a clerk at the Bureau of Ineffable Licenses. They take on Gabe and B.B. at the same time as they try to renew their weapons licenses whilst grilling them on their unusual habit of appearing at many of the same events on Earth. They renew the two of them and send them on their way.

## DMV Intercom

**Played by:** Meg Molloy Tuten

**Episode:** Episode Twenty-Four: Something Other Than the Desperation

A dead sounding voice that calls the numbers for next to be serviced in the Bureau of Ineffable licenses.

## References

1. ↑ Tumblr Ask about the Unknown Creature
2. ↑ Tumblr Ask on Lincoln Farm and keeping halal
3. ↑ Tumblr Ask about Linus's Daughter
4. ↑ Seen and Not Heard Crossover: Two Jews In A Room Signing
5. ↑ Tumblr Ask about Laura's VA