The Variant

**Loki**: Season 1, Episode 2

**The Variant** is the 2nd episode of the 1st season of Loki and the 2nd episode overall.

## Previously on

**HUNTER B-15:** On behalf
of the Time Variance Authority,
I hereby arrest you
for crimes against the Sacred Timeline.

**MISS MINUTES:** Long ago, the all-knowing
Time-Keepers emerged,
creating and organizing
the Sacred Timeline.
Sometimes, people like you
veer off the path.
We call those Variants.

[*Martin screams as he's pruned.*]

**RAVONNA:** Laufeyson, how do you plead?

**MOBIUS:** I'm Agent Mobius, by the way.

**LOKI:** How long have you been here?

**MOBIUS:** I don't know. It's hard to say, you know, time passes differently here in the TVA.

**LOKI:** Now, you parade about
as if you're the divine arbiters
of power in the universe.

**LOKI:** Infinity Stones?

**CASEY:** Some of the guys
use 'em as paperweights.

**LOKI:**
Is this the greatest power
in the universe?

[*Loki gasps as he watches the video of Thanos killing him.*]

**LOKI:** I can't go back, can I?

**MOBIUS:** I can't offer you salvation,
but maybe I can offer
you something better.
A fugitive Variant's been killing
our Minutemen.

**LOKI:** And you need the God of Mischief
to help you stop him?
Why me?

**MOBIUS:** The Variant we're hunting is...
You.

[*Marvel Studios logo.*]

## Oshkosh, Winsconsin 1985

[*Renaissance Faire with music playing. Indistinct chatter.*]

**CHILD:** Make a wish.

[*Hunter C-20 and three Minutemen arrive.*]

**REN FAIRE WOMAN:** Hi! What's going on?
You guys aren't dressed right.
[*Chuckles.*] I... So...

**MINUTEMAN:** Variant detected, Commander.

**HUNTER C-20:** Let's move.

**REN FAIRE WOMAN:** Some of us need this, you know.

[*Hunter C-20 and Minutemen enter a tent.*]

**MINUTEMAN:** No nexus energy yet, ma'am.

[*Music blares over the speakers.*]

**HUNTER C-20:** It's a trap.
Watch your backs!

**ANNOUNCER:** My lords, my ladies, welcome
and thank you for joining us,
here at the castle.
Please, settle into your seats
for a great battle is about to commence.
The prize? Our princess.
Will evil prevail,
or are we holding out for a hero?

[*"Holding Out For A Hero" by Bonnie Tyler begins playing. Hunter C-20 puts her back to a post. A hand reaches around and touches her temple with green magic. Green flashes in her eyes and she begins attacking the Minutemen.*]

**MINUTEMAN:** Commander?

**MUSIC:** Where have all the good men gone
And where are all the Gods?
Where's the streetwise
Hercules to fight...

**MINUTEMAN:** What are you doing?

**THE VARIANT / HUNTER C-20:** Having some fun.

**MUSIC:**
Isn't there a white knight
Upon a fiery steed?

[*Hunter C-20 collapses. The Minuteman checks on her. A cloaked figure steps out.*]

**MUSIC:**
Late at night, I toss and I turn
And I dream of what I need
I need a hero
I'm holding out for a hero
Till the end of the night
He's gotta be strong
And he's gotta be fast
And he's gotta be fresh from the fight

[*Minuteman attacks the figure, who attacks him with a sword, killing him. The figure takes the reset charges and uses a Tempad to open a Timedoor. The figure drags Hunter C-20, who's still unconscious through the Timedoor.*]

**MUSIC:**
I need a hero
I'm holding out for a hero
'Till the morning light
He's gotta be sure and it's gotta be soon
And he's gotta be larger than life
I need a hero!

[*The Timedoor closes behind them.*]]

[*Opening theme.*]

## TVA

### Mobius's desk

[*Loki sits at Mobius's desk, looking at a jet ski magazine. A bell dings. A projection of Miss Minutes stands on the desk.*]

**MISS MINUTES:** Okay, y'all,
let's review what we've learned.
What happens when a nexus event
branches past red line?

**LOKI:** Very bad things.

**MISS MINUTES:** Come on, Loki. What is it?

**LOKI:**
[*Sighs.*] It's when the TVA can
no longer reset a nexus event.
Okay? Boring.

**MISS MINUTES:**
Right. And that would lead
to the destruction of the timeline
and the collapse of reality as we know it.

**LOKI:**
Can you hear me?
Are you a recording? Or are you alive?

**MISS MINUTES:**
Uh, sorta both.

**LOKI:**
Ah.

[*Loki rolls up the magazine and swats at Miss Minutes. She jumps out of the way.*]

**MISS MINUTES:**
Watch it! Where's your manners?
Oh! Hey! Quit it!
That is not nice. Jerk.

[*Miss Minutes goes back into the computer screen.*]

**LOKI:** You can't hide...

**MOBIUS:** Training goin' well?

**LOKI:** Yeah.

**MOBIUS:**
Is that my jet ski magazine?
Put it down. Gear up.
There's been an attack. Let's go.

[*Mobius hands Loki a package. As they walk out, Loki opens it to pull out a TVA jacket.*]

**MOBIUS:** Put it on.

[*Loki does.*]

**MOBIUS:** Good. Yeah. Smart.

### Mission briefing

**HUNTER B-15:**
C-20 and her team went dark
shortly after they jumped
into the 1985 branch.
All signs point to another ambush.
We've grabbed enough temporal aura
to know it's our Loki Variant.
But which kind of Loki, remains unknown.

**LOKI:**
They're the lesser kind, to be clear.

**HUNTER B-15:** [*Sighs.*] Let me see
the back of that jacket.

[*Loki turns, showing the word "VARIANT" printed on the back. Hunter B-15 and the Minutemen look amused.*]

**LOKI:**
Very subtle. Well done.

**HUNTER B-15:**
I don't want anybody out there
to forget what you are.

**LOKI:**
Oh, your only hope
of capturing a murderer?

**HUNTER B-15:**
No. A cosmic mistake.

**MOBIUS:** That's enough.

**LOKI:** Lovely.

**MOBIUS:** Here's the deal.
When we get out on the branch,
we're not just
looking for a Time Criminal.
We're looking for a Loki.
A variation of this guy.

[*A projection comes up showing other Loki variants: L1247/L6792 (Jotunn blue skin), L1247 (in athletic clothes holding a trophy), L6792 (giant), L8914, L5681, L7803...*]

**MOBIUS:**
A type we should
all be very familiar with,
because the TVA
has pruned a lotta these guys,
almost more than any other Variant.
And no two are alike.
Slight differences in appearances,
or not so slight.
Different powers, although,
powers, generally include
shape-shifting,
illusion-projection, and my favorite...

**LOKI:** Duplication-casting.

[*The project closes.*]

**MOBIUS:** Illusion-projection.

**LOKI:**
No, they're two
completely different powers actually.

**MOBIUS:** How?

**LOKI:**
Illusion-projection involves depicting
a detailed image from outside oneself,
which is perceptible
in the external world,
whereas duplication-casting
entails recreating
an exact facsimile of one's own body
in its present circumstance,
which acts as a true holographic mirror
of its molecular structure.
But you already knew that.

**MOBIUS:**
Okay, take a breath. Noted.
We're gonna break into two teams,
including myself and Professor Loki.

**MINUTEMAN:** Why?

**MOBIUS:**
Because whoever this Variant is,
we haven't been able to find him.
So let's bring in an expert.

**LOKI:**
That's me.

[*Loki and Mobius walking.*]

**LOKI:** Do I get a weapon?

**MOBIUS:** Nah.

**LOKI:** Well, I'll have my magic back.
Is no one concerned about that?

**MOBIUS:** Of what?

**LOKI:** Me betraying you.

**MOBIUS:** No.

**LOKI:** Why not?

**MOBIUS:** Because you know that we can catch you.
And how's betraying us gonna get you
any closer to the Time-Keepers?

**LOKI:** An audience
with the Time-Keepers is on the table?

**MOBIUS:**
Keep that focus.

[*The team goes through a Timedoor.*]

## Oshkosh, Wisconsin 1985

**MINUTEMAN:** Apex of nexus signature located, ma'am.

**LOKI:** Let me ask you this,
why don't we just travel
back to before the attack,
when the Variant first arrives?

**MOBIUS:**
Nexus events destabilize the time flow.
This branch is still changing and growing,
so you gotta show up in real time.
Did you watch any of the training videos
you were supposed to?

**LOKI:**
Well, as many as I could stand.
Your TVA propaganda is exhausting.

**MINUTEMAN:**
And what do these do?

**LOKI:**
Reset charges prune the affected
radius of a branched timeline,
allowing time to heal all its wounds.
Which, by the way, sounds like a nice way
of saying "disintegrate
everything in its vicinity."

**MOBIUS:**
He's on it.

**LOKI:**
I watched the videos.
I mean, some of them.

**HUNTER B-15:** So he's taking hostages now?

**MOBIUS:** The Variant's never
taken a hostage before.

**HUNTER B-15:** Maybe he's upping his game.

**MINUTEMAN:** Or he pruned her.

**HUNTER B-15:** A Loki couldn't
have gotten the jump on C-20.

**LOKI:**
I think you underestimate, actually...

**HUNTER B-15:**
Fan out and search for her.
And hurry up because we're at three units until red line.

**MINUTEMAN:** Let's go. She's right.

**MOBIUS:** Come on.

**LOKI:** Wait...
If you leave this tent,
you'll end up like them.

**MOBIUS:**
What do you see?

**LOKI:**
I see a scheme,
and in that scheme, I see myself.
We have a saying in Asgard,
"Where there are wolf's ears,
wolf's teeth are near."
It means to be aware of your surroundings.
Which is absurd, because my people are,
by nature, gullible fools.
A trait that I, the God of Mischief,
exploited time and time again
simply by listening.
My teeth were sharp,
but my ears even sharper.

**HUNTER B-15:**
We're running out of time, Mobius.

**MOBIUS:**
Hold it. Just give him a chance.

**LOKI:** You remind me of them.
The Time Variance Authority
and the gods of Asgard, one and the same.
Drunk with power, blinded to the truth.
Those you underestimate will devour you.
You underestimate me,
just as you
underestimate this lesser Loki.
Which is why, you walk into
one wolf's mouth after another.

[*The TemPad beeps.*]

**HUNTER B-15:** Two units. He is wasting our time.

**MOBIUS:**
Okay. Come on, Loki,
make a long story short.

**HUNTER B-15:** We need to look for C-20.

**LOKI:**
That's exactly what
the Variant wants you to do.
It's a trap.
He's waiting for you outside this tent.

**MINUTEMAN:** Should I secure the reset charges?

**LOKI:**
No. He wants me. I'm the key to his plan.
He knows that I'm stronger than him.

**HUNTER B-15:** Almost one unit.

**LOKI:**
And he rightly believes that together
we can overthrow and rule the TVA.
But that's not what I want.
I have a new purpose.
I am a servant of the Sacred Timeline.
Knowing
what I now know about his tactics,
I can deliver you the Variant...
but I need assurances.

**MOBIUS:**
Yeah?

**LOKI:**
Assurances that I won't be
completely disintegrated
the moment the job has been done.

**MOBIUS:**
Right...

**LOKI:**
[*Whispers*] We'll need to speak
to the Time-Keepers at once.
They're in graver danger than we realized.

[*The TemPad beeps.*]

**MOBIUS:**
He's lying. Just playing games.
There's no one out there.

**HUNTER B-15:** Reset the timeline.

**MOBIUS:**
You had me for a second.
My ears are sharp too.

[*Reset charge is set and goes off, disintegrating everything in its vicinity to restore the timeline. On scanners in the TVA, the variant timeline receeds. A screen reads "TIMELINE RESET".*]

## TVA

### Judge Ravonna Renslayer's Office

**MOBIUS:** Is it just me, or does this office
keep getting better and better?

[*Ravonna uncorks a bottle.*]

**MOBIUS:**
Where'd you get that one, the snow globe?
I love those.
I don't remember bringing back that case.

**RAVONNA:**
You're not the only analyst
working for me.

**MOBIUS:**
But, would you say,
maybe, I'm your favorite one?
And why do you get to keep all
the trophies from my cases in here?
You don't think I'd love
having that roller skate
there sprucing up my cubicle?

**RAVONNA:**
Because I approve the missions.

**MOBIUS:**
Good point.

**RAVONNA:**
Speaking of which,
let's talk about the one you just botched.

[*Mobius groans. Ravonna hands him a drink.*]

**RAVONNA:**
You might need this for our discussion.

**MOBIUS:**
I hope it's a double.

**RAVONNA:**
This Variant is...
"Insubordinate, stubborn, unpredictable."
Sounds like someone else I know.

**MOBIUS:**
I was just thinking
it sounds like someone *I* know.

[*Mobius places his drink on a side table that's stained with glass rings.*]

**RAVONNA:** Mobius?

**MOBIUS:** What?
Those rings were already there.

**RAVONNA:**
And they're all from you.

**MOBIUS:**
Maybe it's from
your other favorite analyst.
Listen, Ravonna, I'm sorry.
I realize that my, you know,
methods with this Loki
are controversial, but...

**RAVONNA:**
Towing a dangerous Variant
into the field is controversial.

**MOBIUS:**
Yeah, it didn't go exactly
the way I wanted it to today,
but here's what we did find out.
The Variant likes to stall for time,
and, eventually, we'll catch
the other one doing the same thing.
Because understanding
this Loki helps me get closer
to the one we're chasing. Right?

**RAVONNA:**
Look, I know you have
a soft spot for broken things.

**MOBIUS:** I don't think so.

**RAVONNA:**
Yes, you do.
But Loki is an evil, lying scourge.
That is the part he plays
on the Sacred Timeline.

**MOBIUS:**
Maybe he wants to mix it up.
Sometimes you get tired
of playing the same part.
Is that possible? He can change?

**RAVONNA:**
Not unless the Time-Keepers decree it.
And then, it shall be so.

**MOBIUS:** And how are the old Time-Keepers?

**RAVONNA:**
[*Sighs.*] How do you think?

**MOBIUS:**
[*Chuckles.*] I don't know.
'Cause I've never met 'em.
Thankfully. Although,
I shouldn't say that.
That one looks...

**RAVONNA:**
The Time-Keepers are monitoring
every aspect of this case.
I've never seen them so involved.
They want that Variant caught.

**MOBIUS:**
So do I.

**RAVONNA:**
And this is the last chance
you're gonna get with this Loki.

**MOBIUS:**
Great. That's all I'm gonna need. [*Sighs.*]

**MOBIUS:**
Thank you, R Slayer.

**MOBIUS:**
I don't remember this.
This must be from that analyst
you keep on the side.

**RAVONNA:**
Stay focused.

**MOBIUS:**
Eyes on the road.

**RAVONNA:** Mobius?

**MOBIUS:**
I was almost gone.

**RAVONNA:**
You really believe in this Variant?

**MOBIUS:**
Mmm... Luckily, he believes in himself
enough for the both of us.
And, hey, if it doesn't work,
I'll delete him myself.
He's really arrogant.

[*Mobius leaves the office and whistles for Loki to join him. They walk back.*]

**LOKI:**
You're probably wondering
what happened out on the mission.
That was your first lesson
in catching a Loki.
Expect the expected.
Half the fun of being a trickster
is knowing everyone knows
you're a trickster, and then,
many of your tricks
can come from exploiting
the fact that you know that they know...

**MOBIUS:** Okay. Just shut up!
Please. What happened
to the guy I met on the elevator?
Who didn't like to talk. Remember him?
Now I'm stuck with this guy
who won't stop yacking away
about what makes a Loki tick!

**LOKI:**
What? Isn't that precisely why I'm here?

**MOBIUS:**
No. I don't care what makes you tick.
You're here to help me catch
the superior version of yourself.
That's it!

**LOKI:**
Hang on.
I'm not sure "superior"
is actually quite the right word.

**MOBIUS:**
See? There it is. Right there.
I believed, stupidly,
that insecure need for validation
would motivate you to find the killer.
Not 'cause you care about
the TVA mission or bein' a hero,
but because you know this Variant
is better than you and you can't take it.

**LOKI:**
Very nice.
I mean, it is adorable that you think
you could possibly manipulate me.
I'm ten steps ahead of you.
I've been playing a game
of my own all along.

**MOBIUS:**
What, charm your way
in front of the Time-Keepers,
hustle them, and seize control of the TVA?
Am I getting warm?
A double cross
by history's most reliable liar.

**LOKI:**
Okay. Why are you in there
sticking your neck out for me?

**MOBIUS:**
I'll give you two options,
and you can believe
whichever one you want.
A, because I see a scared
little boy, shivering in the cold.
And you kinda feel bad for that ice runt.
Or B, I just wanna catch this guy,
and I'll tell you whatever
I need to tell you.

[*They enter the elevator.*]

**LOKI:**
I don't need your sympathy.

**MOBIUS:**
Good, 'cause I'm runnin' out of it.

**LOKI:**
What's this then?
The next step of your manipulation...

**MOBIUS:**
No, this is the final step.
Your last chance.

**LOKI:**
Oh, and what does my desperate
last chance require?

**MOBIUS:**
Work.

**LOKI:**
Work?

### TVA archives

**MOBIUS:**
I need you to go over each
and every one of the Variant's case files,
and then, give me your... How do I put it?
Your unique Loki perspective.
And who knows?
Maybe there's something that we missed.

**LOKI:**
Well, you're idiots.
I suspect you probably missed a lot.

**MOBIUS:**
That's why I'm lucky
I got ya for a little bit longer.
Let me park ya at this desk.
And don't be afraid
to really lean into this work.
Here's a good trick for you.
Pretend your life depends on it.
I'm gonna get a snack.

[*Loki looks through the files. He flips open another one to read it.*]

**LOKI:**
[*Mocking*]
Oh, my goodness.
Don't tell me the Variant ambushed
and killed *another* team of Minutemen.
[*Gasp.*] And stole
their reset charge as well.

**WOMAN:**
Shh.

**LOKI:**
Shh.

[*Loki approaches the archivist's desk where she's typing.*]

**LOKI:**
Hi.

[*She continues typing.*]

**LOKI:**
Hello?

[*She continues typing. He ring the bell on her desk. She stops and looks at him.*]

**ARCHIVIST:**
Can I help you?

**LOKI:**
Yes. I'm on some important TVA business.
Follow-up to a field mission.
You know how it goes.
We red lined near the apex, and...
Well, it's never good. [*Chuckles softly.*]
Um, I'd like all files pertaining
to the creation of the TVA, please.

**ARCHIVIST:**
Those are classified.

**LOKI:**
Okay. I'd like all files pertaining
to the beginning of time then.

**ARCHIVIST:** Those are classified.

**LOKI:**
Okay, the end of time.

**ARCHIVIST:** Those are classified.

**LOKI:** Okay, what files can I have?

[*In the stacks, the archivists pulls out a file and hands it to him. It's file on variant L1130 - himself.*]

**ARCHIVIST:** Happy reading.

[*Loki sighs.*]

[*Back at the desk, Loki pulls up the file on the Destruction of Asgard. Total planetary destruction. 9,719 casualties. Entire civilization annihilated. Zero variance energy detected. Loki grabs the file and goes to Mobius.*]

### Cafeteria

**LOKI:**
I found something.

**MOBIUS:**
No, I said, "Don't bother me
until you've read all the files."

**LOKI:** I have.

**MOBIUS:** Every file?

**LOKI:** Yes.

**MOBIUS:** Pertaining to the Variant?

**LOKI:** The answer isn't in the files,
it's on the timeline.
He's hiding in apocalypses.

**MOBIUS:**
Which apocalypse?
Any time in history, there's, like, a million of 'em.

**LOKI:**
Ragnarok. Are you familiar?

**MOBIUS:**
Yes. The destruction of Asgard
and most of its people. I'm sorry.

**LOKI:**
Yes, very sad.
Anyway, it got me thinking...

**MOBIUS:**
Go ahead.

**LOKI:**
Nexus events
happen when someone does something
they're not supposed to do, right?

**MOBIUS:**
Well, it's a little more
complicated, but, yeah.

**LOKI:**
Great. And then that thing
they're not supposed to do,
cascades into a whole range of other
things that aren't supposed to happen.
And so on and so forth, until eventually,
a new timeline branches. Yes?

**MOBIUS:**
Chaotic alterations
of a predetermined outcome.

**LOKI:** Exactly.

**MOBIUS:** Mmm-hmm.

**LOKI:** So, let's just say...

[*Loki takes Mobius's salad.*]

**MOBIUS:** What are you doing?

**LOKI:** ...your salad is Asgard in this scenario.

**MOBIUS:** No, it's not Asgard, that's my lunch.

**LOKI:** It's a metaphor. Just hang in there.

**MOBIUS:** I want that salad.

**LOKI:**
And I could go down to Asgard
before Ragnarok
causes its complete destruction
and I could do anything I wanted.
I could, let's say,
push the Hulk off the Rainbow Bridge.

[*Loki starts shaking salt into Mobius's salad.*]

**LOKI:** There he goes.

**MOBIUS:** The salt's Hulk?

**LOKI:** And I could also...
Set fire to the palace.

[*Loki starts shaking pepper into Mobius's salad.*]

**MOBIUS:**
No, just stop.
Don't set fire to the palace.

**LOKI:**
Okay? I can do whatever I want to do,
and it would never matter.
It wouldn't go against the dictates
of the timeline because...

[*Loki picks up Mobius's can of Josta but it's empty. He runs to the next table where Casey is eating.*]

**LOKI:** Excuse me?

**MOBIUS:** Oh, God!

**CASEY:** You!

**LOKI:** Nice to see you.
I just need this for a second. Thanks.

[*Loki takes Casey's drink back to the table with Mobius and continues.*]

**LOKI:** Because the apocalypse is coming.
Ragnarok, Surtur will destroy
Asgard no matter what I do.

[*Loki pours the drink into the salad.*]

**MOBIUS:** No, don't do... [*Sighs.*]

**LOKI:** There's the apocalypse.

**MOBIUS:** That's the apocalypse?

**LOKI:** Ragnarok obliterates the salt.
Ragnarok.
There it is.

**MOBIUS:** What am I lookin' at?

**LOKI:**
Okay, it was a clumsy metaphor.
But you see what I mean.
It doesn't matter.
It could be any apocalypse.
It could be a tidal wave.
It could be a meteor.
It could be a volcano, a supernova.
If everything and everyone around you
is destined for imminent destruction,
then nothing that I say or do will matter,
because the timeline's not gonna branch.
'Cause it gets destroyed.
Hence, the Variant could be
hiding in the apocalypse
and do whatever he wants,
and we wouldn't know!

**MOBIUS:** Not bad.

**LOKI:**
Take me to a real apocalypse,
take me to Ragnarok, I'll show you.

**MOBIUS:**
[*Chuckles.*] Yeah. So you can run away
back to your homeland? No.

**LOKI:**
No, I'm not going home.
We can go anywhere.

**MOBIUS:**
I'm not taking you for a stroll along
the promenade, much less an apocalypse.

**LOKI:**
Oh, Mobius, come on!
What could possibly go wrong?
We gotta properly test this theory.

**MOBIUS:**
Well, here's a fun theory.
You lure me out into the field,
and then you stab me in the back.
And that's a theory I don't wanna test.

**LOKI:**
I'd never stab anyone in the back.
That's such a boring form of betrayal.

**MOBIUS:**
Loki, I've studied almost
every moment of your entire life.
You've literally stabbed
people in the back, like, 50 times.

**LOKI:**
Well, I'd never do it again,
because it got old.

**MOBIUS:**
[*chuckling*] Okay.

**LOKI:**
Okay, look, you don't trust me,
you can trust one thing.
I love to be right.

## Pompeii, Italy 79 AD

[*Loki and Mobius are hidden to the side against a building, out of the way. People walks the streets. There's a rumble in the distant.*]

**LOKI:** [*Whispering.*] Here we go.

**MOBIUS:** Shh, any minute now.

**LOKI:**
Until this entire town
is wiped off the face of this planet.
Imagine. All that volcanic ash...

**MOBIUS:**
I know. We don't want to get too giddy.

**LOKI:**
Oh, come on! It's cool.

**MOBIUS:**
No, it is cool, but it's just, it's just
not in good taste because of...

**LOKI:**
Well they're all gonna die anyway.

**MOBIUS:**
I know. Now listen, I'm gonna watch
the TemPad for any variance energy.

**LOKI:** Okay.

**MOBIUS:** Okay, because we gotta be careful.
If you're wrong,
and there's a good chance you are,
anything we do can create a huge branch.

**LOKI:** Oh, Mobius! You make even
the end of the world sound boring.

**MOBIUS:**
Listen! Okay, we're not meant to be here.
Okay?

**LOKI:** Okay.

**MOBIUS:**
Anything we do can impact
the course of history.
Do you get that?

**LOKI:** Yes. Yes.

**MOBIUS:**
So we're gonna start
with very small disturbances.

**LOKI:** Very small.

**MOBIUS:** Can you make bird noises?

**LOKI:** Bird noises?

**MOBIUS:**
Yeah. Bird noises.
Like some, like, whooshing noises.
[*Mimics bird cooing noises.*]

**LOKI:** Oh. [*Groans.*]

[*Loki runs out into the street.*]

**MOBIUS:** Loki! Loki!

[*Loki goes to a cart with goats. He opens the latch so they can escape.*]

**LOKI:** Go! [*Yipping.*]
Be free, my horned-friends, be free!
[*In Latin*]
*My name is Loki. We are agents of the Time Variance Authority.*
I bring you all dark tidings.
All of you!
You're all about to die.
That volcano is about to erupt!
I would know, because I'm from the future.
[*In English to Mobius*] We are
from the future, right?
What is the TVA?
I mean, it's from the future.
It sounds from the future.
It's pretty future-y.

[*The volcano rumbles in the distance and begins to erupt. People scream and begin to run.*]

**LOKI:** Right on cue! [*Chuckles.*]
Enjoy your last meal while you can!
Nothing matters!
Nothing has any consequence!
Dance while you still can!
Whoo-hoo!
How'd we do?

**MOBIUS:**
I don't believe it. Zero variance energy.
No branching in the timeline.

**LOKI:**
The TVA would never
even know we were here.
If it were me, this is where I would hide.

## TVA

### Mobius's desk

**MOBIUS:**
Doomsdays. The Variant's been
ambushing our soldiers
and hiding out in doomsdays
to cover his tracks.

**LOKI:** You're welcome.

**MOBIUS:** Yeah.
But in order for this theory to hold,
the disasters have to be
naturally-occurring,
sudden, no warning, no survivors.

**LOKI:** How many of those disasters could there possibly be?

**MOBIUS:** I don't know.
We're gonna find out.

### TVA archives

[*Loki and Mobius are back at the desk in the archives, files all around them. Loki has fallen asleep.*]

**MOBIUS:**
Hey?
Come on, let's take a walk.

[*They go to the cafe. It's empty except for them.*]

**LOKI:**
By the way, at your desk, that magazine?

**MOBIUS:**
Yeah. The one on jet skis?

**LOKI:**
Yes.
Why do you have that?

**MOBIUS:** Because they're awesome.

**LOKI:** [*Chuckles.*] I suppose they are.

**MOBIUS:** Yeah.
You know, some things... Actually,
most things in history are kinda dumb,
and everything gets ruined eventually.
But in the early 1990s,
for a brief, shining moment,
there was a beautiful union
of form and function,
which we call the jet ski,
and a reasonable man cannot differ.

**LOKI:**
You ever been on one?

**MOBIUS:**
No... No.
I think a TVA agent showing up
on a jet ski on the Sacred Timeline,
that would create a branch for sure.

**LOKI:**
Oh it'd be fun, though.

**MOBIUS:**
Yeah, it'd be really fun.

**LOKI:**
So, why read about them?

**MOBIUS:**
It just helps remind me
of what we're fighting for.

**LOKI:**
I mean, you really believe
in all this stuff, don't you?

**MOBIUS:**
I don't get hung up on,
"Believe, not believe."
I just accept what is.

**LOKI:** Three magic lizards...

**MOBIUS:** Time-Keepers.

**LOKI:** ...created the TVA, and everyone in it...

**MOBIUS:** Right.

**LOKI:** ...including you?

**MOBIUS:** Including me.

**LOKI:**
You see, every time I start
to admire your intelligence,
you say something like that.

**MOBIUS:** Okay, who created you, Loki?

**LOKI:**
A Frost Giant of Jotunheim.

**MOBIUS:**
And who raised you?

**LOKI:**
Odin of Asgard.

**MOBIUS:**
Odin, God of the Heavens.
Asgard, mystical realm, beyond the stars.
Frost Giants. Listen to yourself...

**LOKI:** It's not the same.
It's completely different.

**MOBIUS:** No no no.

**LOKI:** It's not the same.

**MOBIUS:** Actually it's exactly the same thing.
Because if you think too hard
about where any of us came from,
who we truly are,
it sounds kinda ridiculous.
Existence is chaos.
Nothing makes any sense,
so we try to make some sense of it.
And I'm just lucky that the chaos
I emerged into gave me all this...
My own glorious purpose.

[*Loki scoffs.*]

**MOBIUS:**
'Cause the TVA is my life.
And it's real because I believe it's real.

**LOKI:**
Fair enough. You believe it's real.

**MOBIUS:**
Yeah.

**LOKI:**
So everything is written.
Past, present, future.
There's no such thing as free will.

**MOBIUS:**
Well, I mean, you know,
it's an oversimplification...

**LOKI:**
So, in fact, in a way,
you and I here at the TVA,
we're the only ones who are actually free.

**MOBIUS:**
Where are you going with this, Loki?

**LOKI:**
How does it all end?

**MOBIUS:**
That's a work in progress.

**LOKI:**
Oh, those lazy Time-Keepers.
What are they waiting for?

**MOBIUS:**
*Au contraire.*
No. Because while we protect
what came before,
they're toiling away in their chamber,
untangling the epilogue
from its infinite branches.

**LOKI:**
Ah, I see. So, when they're finished,
what happens then?

**MOBIUS:**
So are we.
No more nexus events.
Just order.
And we meet in peace at the end of time.
Nice, right?

**LOKI:** Only order?

**MOBIUS:** Mmm-hmm.

**LOKI:**
No chaos? It sounds boring.

**MOBIUS:**
I'm sure it does to you.

**LOKI:**
You know, you called me a scared little boy.

**MOBIUS:**
I called you a lotta things.

**LOKI:**
You did.
You're wrong, though.
You see, I know something children don't.

**MOBIUS:**
What's that?

**LOKI:**
That no one bad is ever truly bad.
And no one good is ever truly good.

**MOBIUS:**
Scared little boy.

**LOKI:**
Yes, it was quite patronizing.
I thought it was a bit too far, actually.

**MOBIUS:**
You're very clever.

[*Mobius gets up.*]

**LOKI:**
I know.

### Archives

[*Back in the stacks, Mobius pulls open a box.*]

**MOBIUS:**
The Variant left something
behind at an old crime scene.
A cathedral. A candy box.
An obvious anachronism.
I gave it to Analysis,
but they couldn't find anything real.

**LOKI:** Why does that matter?

**MOBIUS:** 'Cause now we have two variables.
Apocalyptic natural disasters and... Kablooie.

**LOKI:** What's that?

**MOBIUS:** Candy. Do you have candy on Asgard?

**LOKI:**
Yeah. Grapes, nuts.

**MOBIUS:**
No wonder you're so bitter.

[*Back at the desk.*]

**MOBIUS:**
Okay. Kablooie was only sold
regionally on Earth from 2047 to 2051.
All you gotta do is cross-reference
that with every apocalyptic event.
I'm gonna give you half.
And let's make it a competition, see who finds it.

**LOKI:** Sure.

**MOBIUS:** What, you wanna bet something?

**LOKI:** Yeah.

**MOBIUS:** Gentleman's bet.
Yeah, let's play for pride.
Okay. May the best man win. Go.

[*They begin going through the files.*]

**MOBIUS:** Anything?

**LOKI:** Uh...
It's not the climate disaster of 2048.
Or the tsunami of 2051.

**MOBIUS:**
Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Come on.

**LOKI:**
The extinction of the swallow...
Is that a thing?

**MOBIUS:**
Completely screwed up the ecosystem.

**LOKI:**
Krakatoa erupted in 2049 as well.
No Kablooie.

**MOBIUS:**
God, it's just one damn thing
after another, isn't it?
Cyclone, famine, volcanoes, floods...

**LOKI:** Got him.

[*Loki shows Mobius a file on an apocalyptic event: Class ten apocalypse; category 8 hurricane; 10,835 casualties; Haven Hills, Alabama.*]

**LOKI:** That's where he is.

**MOBIUS:** Alabama, 2050.
You're gonna take my job
if I'm not careful.

### Ravonna Renslayer's office

**RAVONNA:** You want me to approve deployment
of a fully-armed task force to...

**MOBIUS:** Yeah.

**RAVONNA:** ...the Variant's *potential* hiding spot?

**MOBIUS:** Haven Hills, Alabama,
corporate town
owned by Roxxcart until
it's wiped out by a hurricane.
All the food and supplies you need.
If he likes it there, there's no reason
he can't keep going back
and just camping out, over and over.

**RAVONNA:**
And this is all based
on a theory from the Variant
who just blew your previous mission?

**MOBIUS:** Yeah, he's doing great.

**RAVONNA:**
Mobius, as your friend,
I have to tell you that trusting
this man is not a good idea.

**MOBIUS:**
No no, I know.
But maybe he's worth the trouble.
He just uncovered
a massive hole in our security, right?

**RAVONNA:**
That's what concerns me!

**MOBIUS:**
I can handle him. Trust me.
This is where we get our guy.

**RAVONNA:**
You, I trust, but him.

**RAVONNA:**
Listen, Ravonna,
every instinct is telling me
this is where we nail the Variant.
Come on. You don't see me
usually this worked up, right?
I'm, I'm excited.
I'm chomping at the bit.

**RAVONNA:** Okay.

**MOBIUS:** Yes. Okay.

**RAVONNA:** But, Mobius?

**MOBIUS:** Yeah?

**RAVONNA:**
There's not much I can do
if it doesn't work out.

**MOBIUS:**
For all time.

**RAVONNA:**
Always.

**MOBIUS:** Okay.

### Mission briefing

[*Mobius leaves Ravonna's office, where Loki is sitting, waiting for him.*]

**MOBIUS:** We're on.

[*They walk to the briefing.*]

**MOBIUS:** We are doing some good work today.

**LOKI:** I thought so too.

**MOBIUS:**
I'm tellin' you.
You actually help us catch this Variant,
and who knows, my friend.

**LOKI:**
What, good enough for a face-to-face
with the Time-Keepers?

**MOBIUS:**
I didn't say that.
One step at a time.

**LOKI:** All right. One step at a time.

**MOBIUS:** Just in case.

[*Mobius hands Loki his knives.*]

**MOBIUS:** Yeah, don't those feel...

**HUNTER B-15:** Absolutely not.

[*Hunter B-15 takes the knives from Loki and places them in a locker. She turns to the team.*]

**HUNTER B-15:** Gather around for a briefing.
Roxxcart is a vast superstore
common to the era.
It consists of a series
of sprawling sections,
including a large warehouse.
This warehouse is being used by civilians
as a shelter tryin' to ride out the storm.
Remember, this is a class ten apocalypse.
While the Variant
shouldn't know we're coming,
he could be hiding anywhere
and should be considered hostile.
So stay alert.
Every time there is an attack,
the Variant steals a reset charge.
He's planning something.
We just don't know what.
So keep an eye out
for the missing charges,
and if you see a Loki, prune it.

**LOKI:** The bad Loki, preferably.

## Roxxcart in Haven Hills, Alabama 2050

[*Raining heavily. Thunder rumbles. A communications tower crashes through a bright electric "Haven Hills, Alabama" sign. Fires erupt around the dark town. The Roxxcart store is brightly lit with a blue sign. The team comes out in the Roxxcart parking lot.*]

**MOBIUS:** Anything?

**HUNTER B-15:** Nothing yet. Move out!

[*The team enters the Roxxcart store. Loki sighs and uses magic, and suddenly he's dry.*]

**HUNTER B-15:** The hell was that?

**LOKI:** That was me using magic to dry my clothes.
So I don't announce myself with every
squeaky footstep like the rest of you.

[*Thunder rumbles. The power flickers.*]

**HUNTER B-15:** Take both teams
and sweep the storm shelter.

**HUNTER D-90:** Yes, ma'am.

**MOBIUS:** Okay, Loki and I are gonna
check out the Green House. We'll meet back at the showroom.

**HUNTER B-15:** No.

**MOBIUS:** No?

**HUNTER B-15:** You go with D-90. He stays with me.

**MOBIUS:** What are you talking about? He's under my supervision.

**HUNTER B-15:** This is my field op, Mobius.
If he's not a threat, then it won't be a problem.

**MOBIUS:** Of course he's a threat.
Do you not remember the Time Theater?

**LOKI:** Mobius...

**MOBIUS:** That's why I want him with me.

**HUNTER B-15:** You are welcome to go back
to the TVA and litigate
with Renslayer, but right now...

**MOBIUS:** We're here. We're not going back.
The Variant is here.

**LOKI:** Mobius, it's fine. It's fine.
You can trust me.
I understand
I have to earn that, so, I will.

**MOBIUS:** Why is it the people you can't trust
are always saying, "Trust me"?
Okay, try to hang on
to your Time Collar this time.

**HUNTER D-90:**
We'll see you in the showroom.

[*The team splits up. Meanwhile, the Variant watches the exchange on the store's security cameras. The Variant sets a TemPad with a 20 minute countdown.*]

### Green house

**LOKI:** I for one am glad we're getting
to spend this time together.

**HUNTER B-15:** Quiet.

[*Sound of soft clicking in an aisle.*]

**LOKI:** I'm saying we got off on the wrong...

**HUNTER B-15:** Shh.

[*They see a person looking at plants on a shelf. Hunter B-15 lifts her weapon.*]

**HUNTER B-15:** Hey!

**SHOPPER:**
Whoa, whoa. It's okay. It's okay.

**HUNTER B-15:** What are you doing?

**SHOPPER:** Shopping for plants.

**LOKI:** In this storm?

**SHOPPER:**
It's a hurricane sale.
Azaleas are half off.

**HUNTER B-15:**
[*Whispers to Loki*] Could that be you?

**LOKI:**
[*Whispers*] I mean, I probably would have
worn a suit, but... yes, maybe.

[*Hunter B-15 approaches the man, who touches her arm and green magic runs from him into her. The man collapses.*]

**LOKI:** Is he dead?

**THE VARIANT / HUNTER B-15:**
No. They usually survive.
So, you're the fool
the TVA brought in to hunt me down.

**LOKI:** Me, I presume.

**THE VARIANT / HUNTER B-15:**
Please. If anyone's anyone, you're me.

**LOKI:**
How nice to meet you.

### Shelter

[*Mobius and his team enter the shelter. The news is on. A baby is crying.*]

**NEWS ANCHOR:** For the past hour
we have seen winds intensifying.
Again, if you're just tuning in...

**HUNTER D-90:** Check the bags
for the reset charges.

**ROXXCART EMPLOYEE:**
You guys FEMA?
National Guard?

**MINUTEMAN:**
Could be any one of them.

**ROXXCART EMPLOYEE:**
Well, hey, if you got
a 'copter or other transport,
now is the time to use it.
We got women and kids,
and that weather ain't playin'.

**MOBIUS:**
No, I'm sorry. We don't.

**ROXXCART EMPLOYEE:**
Well, how the heck did you get here?

[*Hunter D-90 pushes the man out of the way to begin searching bags.*]

**MOBIUS:**
What are you doing?
Hey! These people are scared.

**HUNTER D-90:**
They're about to die.
They should be scared.

**MOBIUS:**
Okay. Not of us.
Take it easy.

**MINUTEMAN:**
Sir!

**MOBIUS:**
What is it?

[*The minuteman takes Mobius to a room where Hunter C-20 is sitting on the ground.*]

**HUNTER C-20:** [*Breathing heavily.*]
It's real. It's real. It's real.
It's real. It's real. It's real.

### Store

**LOKI:**
Enchantment is a clever trick.
Cowardly, a bit amateur-ish, but clever.

**THE VARIANT / HUNTER B-15:**
Almost as cowardly as working for the TVA.

**LOKI:**
I'm working for me.

**THE VARIANT / HUNTER B-15:**
[*Scoffs.*] You really believe that,
don't you?

**LOKI:**
Yeah.

**THE VARIANT / HUNTER B-15:**
[*Chuckles.*]
And here I was worried
that they'd found a better version of me.

[*An employee approaches.*]

**RANDY:**
Hi, are you guys looking
for the disaster shelter?

**THE VARIANT / HUNTER B-15:**
No.

[*The Variant / Hunter-B15 touches Randy's arm. With a flash of magic, Hunter B-15 collapses, unconscious. Green magic flashes in Randy's eyes. Loki checks Hunter B-15.*]

**THE VARIANT / RANDY:** Oh, bless.
Are you going to call your little friends
for help? [*Chuckles.*]

**LOKI:** What's the matter?
You too scared to meet me face-to-face?
Show yourself.
You know, gaining their confidence
was no mean feat.

**THE VARIANT / RANDY:**
Oh, my God.
You went undercover.

**LOKI:**
If you could possibly sheathe
your smarm for a moment,
I have an offer for you.
That's why I found you.

**THE VARIANT / RANDY:**
Go on.

**LOKI:**
I'm going to overthrow the Time-Keepers.
And, uh, cards on the table,
I could use a qualified lieutenant.

**THE VARIANT / RANDY:**
And I assume you mean... Me?

**LOKI:**
What say you...
Loki?

**THE VARIANT / RANDY:**
Ugh. Don't call me that.
You can call me... [*Looks down the nametag.*]
Randy.

**LOKI:**
God. Now I understand
why Thor found this so annoying.
Listen, enough with your games.
I've been trying to help you.
I kept them vulnerable
at the Renaissance Fair for some time.

**THE VARIANT / RANDY:**
Oh, gosh,
and that was just so nice of you.
But after eight to ten seconds
of consideration,
the answer is no.
I'm not interested in ruling
the Time Variance Authority.

[*The Variant / Randy walks off, and Loki follows. Unseen by Loki, behind a shelf a reset charge is set up. The variant connects a wire.*]

### Shelter

**HUNTER C-20:** It's real. It's real.
It was real. It was real.

**MOBIUS:**
What's real? What's...

**HUNTER C-20:** It's real.

**HUNTER D-90:**
She's off the dial.

**HUNTER C-20:** It's real.

**MOBIUS:** Look at me.

**HUNTER C-20:** It's real.
I wanna go home.

**MOBIUS:**
We're gonna get you there.
Call the TVA, let the infirmary know...

**HUNTER C-20:** No, no, no. I gave it away.
I gave it away.

**HUNTER D-90:** What did you give away...

**HUNTER C-20:**
The Time-Keepers, where they are.
I gave it away how to find them.

**HUNTER D-90:** [*into radio*] B-15, what is your status?

### Store

**HUNTER D-90:** [*over radio*] *B-15, come in. What's your status?*

[*HUNTER B-15 starts to get up.*]

**HUNTER D-90:** [*over radio*] *B-15, do you copy?*

### Small appliances aisle

**LOKI:**
If you don't wanna rule the TVA,
then what do you want?

**THE VARIANT / RANDY:**
It doesn't matter. You're too late.

**LOKI:**
Well I think you'll find
I'm well ahead of schedule.
I found your hiding place like that. [*Snaps fingers.*]
I'd say that makes me
the superior Loki, wouldn't you?

[*Loki sees a reset charge connected with wires.*]

**LOKI:**
[*Sighs.*] I see. That's your plan.
Lure us all here
so you can blow the place up.

[*He looks back to The Variant / Randy, but he's gone. As he looks around, someone kicks him down. The Variant, in a new man's body, chuckles.*]

**LOKI:**
I miss Randy.

[*The Variant / Man kicks Loki again.*]

**THE VARIANT / MAN:**
Thank you for helping me stall for time.
You really do love to hear yourself talk.

**LOKI:**
[*Panting.*] You're the first person
to tell me that.

[*The Variant / Man throws Loki across the floor. He mumbles in mockery of what Loki said.*]

**LOKI:**
I would never treat me like this.

[*Loki gets to his feet and faces The Variant / Man.*]

**LOKI:**
Hi.

[*They fight. Loki uses magic to bring a rumba-like appliance to shield himself.*]

**LOKI:**
Oh, come on. Stop hiding.

[*The Variant / Man throws Loki aside and tosses away the appliance. Loki grabs a vacuum cleaner as a weapon and they fight. The Variant tries to strangle Loki with the electric cord.*]

**LOKI:**
If you had any honor
you'd fight me as yourself.

**THE VARIANT / MAN:**
I have shit to do.

**LOKI:**
Enough!

[*The Variant / Man throws Loki through a stack of boxes. Electric toy dogs drive around him and bark.*]

### Exercise equipment aisle

[*Hunter B-15 meets up with Mobius and Hunter D-90.*]

**HUNTER B-15:** Mobius.

**MOBIUS:**
Where is he?

**HUNTER B-15:**
I lost him.

**MOBIUS:**
What happened?

**HUNTER B-15:**
I...

**HUNTER D-90:**
Looks like your favorite
Loki betrayed you.

**MOBIUS:** Just move!

### Small appliances

[*The Variant / Man connects a TemPad. Loki gets back up and walks toward him.*]

**LOKI:**
What do you want from me?
What is this about?

**THE VARIANT / MAN:** [*Chuckles.*] Brace yourself, Loki.

[*The Variant / Man laughs. His eyes flash green with magic, and then he collapses. Loki sighs. Behind is the sound of a recording of Loki's words.*]

**LOKI RECORCING:**
What do you want from me?
What do you want from me?
What do you want from me?
What is this about?
What do you want from me?
What is this about?
What do you want from me?
What do you want from me?
What is this about?
What is this about?

[*Loki turns to see The Variant, cloaked and hooded. The Variant pulls back her hood, revealing herself.*]

**THE VARIANT:** This isn't about you.

**LOKI:** Right.

[*The timer on the TemPad reaches zero. The power in the store goes out and the lights go dark. Dozens, perhaps hundreds, of reset charges activate. Small Timedoors begin opening beneath each other, dropping them to other destinations.*]

**MOBIUS:**
Where they going?

## TVA

[*The timeline monitor beeps, showing multiple branches of the timeline.*]

**CHRONOMONITOR:**
That's not possible.

**ANALYST 1182-E:**
This is Analyst 1182-E,
uh, reporting a code, uh, 000.
Branches rapidly forming at a slope...

**CHRONOMONITOR:**
Somebody just bombed the Sacred Timeline.

[*The monitor shows branches across worlds and times, including Earth, Vormir, Sakaar, Ego, Titan, and Xandar.*]

[*In her office, Ravonna Renslayer gets up and grabs a weapon.*]

[*Timedoors open and Minutemen run through.*]

## Roxxcart in Haven Hills, Alabama 2050

[*The red emergency lights have come on. Loki turns back to The Variant. She lifts the TemPad and opens a Timedoor. She waves to him and steps through. He takes a few steps toward her. The lights partially come back on, some white, some backup red. Mobius and the team runs up the aisle behind him. Loki looks back at them.*]

**MOBIUS:** Loki!
Loki, wait!
Wait! Loki, wait!
No! Wait, Loki!

[*Loki steps through the Timedoor and it closes behind him.*]

**MOBIUS:**
Damn it!

[*End credits.*]