How to seriously injure someone with this book

### By Allegra Pentaghast

-next to the instructions are many images and diagrams of books and various hitting techniques-

Many of us love terrible love novels, and sometimes you whoever you may be, a mage, a templar, a warrior trying to mind her business when random recruits won't leave you alone for a minute needing you to babysit them. Or you may find yourself reading in the middle of a battlefield and have little time to grab for your Sword. As such I've written this guide to turn the thing you are holding right now in a deadly weapon.

Step 1 is to consider the weight of the book. You may notice that for the size of its content the book is unusually large. That is no coincidence. A heavier load the more damage you do to your enemies same as with a warhammer or an axe the heavier the weapon the more damaging it is.

Now as any warrior would tell you, wielding a weapon thats too heavy for you in battlefield is suicide. That is also correct in our case. If the book you want to injure someone with is too cumbersome your attacks will be awkward and your opponent is more likely to dodge. This is why this book while large doesn't compare to say - the chant which could take a head off someone however could only be wielded by a skilled templar. The book you are reading is perfectly balanced for both beginners and more advanced readers however if you find it too heavy don't worry for we have more tips on how to seriously injure someone with lighter books.

Step 2 is all about the technique. Do I swing an open book at them or close it and use the full force of all 2000 pages of swords and shields? Should I jab them with the corners? Or should I go for the blunt attack. The answer depends on you alone. I recommend practice on a dummy or if you don't have one you may put a bucket on top of a barrel. I will however recommend AGAINST hitting someone with the book open, not only are you not utilising the whole book, you risk damaging the book itself. A closed book is a sturdy book that will deal the most damage. Some fools have considered an idea of smashing a person's face with an opened book by closing it on them. This however is foolish as doing any serious damage with that technique would require the strength of a qunari and a book large enough to fit their head. At best you may break someones nose.

If you are using a lighter book jabs are your friends. A lighter book means a thinner book as such the corners are smaller than the thick ones. If the cover has corners reinforced with metal use those however if it doesn't use the corners on the side of the spine else they will become worn and useless for the next time you wish to attack. For blunt trauma the spine is recommended as when hitting with the spine you get a better grip and more forced concentrated over a smaller area. However if you feel you do not have enough strength and feel a need to use 2 hands feel free to strike with the front or back cover. I would also advice against throwing the book as not only might it damage it, you lose the one weapon you had in your hand.

Step 3. Now that you know how to hit them we need to cover where. This book after all is about how to SERIOUSLY injure someone with this book. Long story short. If using jabs go for the eyes, the throat or any other vital areas. Use 2 hands if you have to and really push the book in. If you mean to use blunt approach be sure to target the face and head. If you think you have enough strength just bashing their head in should do enough to knock someone out. If not targeting the arms and the legs might break some bones and make the foe flee.

Step 4 - what happens if they fight back? It may depend on the situation of course but in general should the one you want to injure fights back all may depend on your combat skills, if you are quick enough you may knock them unconscious before they do anything, should they try to disarm them ensure your own grip on the book is sturdy and wiggle it out of their grip. If they try to attack you a book makes a decent enough shield if big enough however it is bad compared to an actual shield. If your opponent has a weapon using your book as a shield is useless and it might be best for you to use your own weapons against them or flee. You may still want to use your book to riposte their attack however then go with a jab. For those skilled and confident enough I won't disparage you for trying to still use your book as a weapon if you've nothing else.

I hope that with this book you learned that even tho you might seem unarmed you have a deadly weapon right now in your hands.