Ziltoidian Empire

***"Ziltoidian Empire"*** is the third song from the Ziltoid the Omniscient album *Dark Matters*, released in 2014.

## Appearances

* *Z²: Dark Matters* (original studio recording, promo mix, raw mix)
* *Ziltoid Live at the Royal Albert Hall* (live recording)

## Versions

### Ziltoidian Empire (Promo Mix)

The same recording as the final version, but with the original mix before Townsend changed it just prior to mastering.

### Ziltoidian Empire (Raw Mix)

The same as the final version, but without narrative dialogue.

### Ziltoidian Empire (Live)

Available on *Ziltoid Live at the Royal Albert Hall*.

## Lyrics

```
    Calling on the earth's core (part of the mind)
    We are human beings!

    Calling on the earth's core (part of the mind)
    We are humans being!

    What will we find, when we all will die?

    [Ziltoid:] Collective, this is commander Ziltoid the omniscient reporting
    [Collective:] Greetings, Ziltoid...what is that strange creature?!?
    [Ziltoid:] Oh, this little thing! Yes... they call it a 'Poozer'
    [Collective:] ...From the planet Titan?? You must take it back!!!

    Calling on the earth's core (part of the mind)
    We are human beings!
    Calling on the earth's core (part of the mind)
    We are humans being!

    Where do we find the human soul?
    All the searching leads to you!

    (I've grown over, I roll over)
    I crawl over my life of honour
    All these children, entitled horrors...

    [Narrator:]
    Meanwhile, far across the solar system, Queen Blattaria, a war princess
    and the mother of the poozers, realizes one of her children has gone
    missing!
    [Blattaria:] Oh no... where is my Poozer!!!!!!???
    [Narrator:] The plot thickens...

    (I am nowhere, I am no one... I am nowhere, I am no one)

    [Collective:] Commander, are you sure that the war princess does not
    suspect it was you who abducted her Poozer?
    [Ziltoid:] Oh yes, absolutely collective, indeed. You should have seen me:
    I was in and out like the wind! Indeed. She shall never suspect a thing!!
    [Collective:] We hope so, for your sake
    We cannot risk intergalactic war with Titan. Where is the Poozer now?
    [Narrator:] Up to this point, Ziltoid has had his back turned to the
    Poozer... but he makes a break for it.
    [Collective:] Quickly, Ziltoid, show us the Poozer!
    [Ziltoid:] Yes, of course, I've kept a very close eye on him... err...

    (We are all in line and we are all prepared to die)

    [Ziltoid:] Gadzooks! HE'S GONE!!!
    [Narrator:] Through the cold abyss of space, the little Poozer
    races home...
    [Ziltoid:] Collective! I'm sure that he was right here... computer!
    [Computer:] Commander?
    [Ziltoid:] Please tell me where the Poozer is now...
    [Computer:] Current location of the Poozer: directly through the wormhole.
    [Ziltoid:] Hmmmm... well... poop.
    [Narrator:]
    Through the wormhole, the Poozer has arrived back on Titan.
    He reports to his mother, the war princess, what he has seen, and that it
    was Ziltoid who had abducted him! Now the War Princess is a beautiful,
    vain, and rather grumpy creature. She lusts for power, and though she is
    the mother of countless Poozers, her vanity has made her rather revolted
    by these "children" of hers. She is devious; and knows that she can utilize
    their blind love and devotion to create a formidable army! We see now her
    missing Poozer as it enters her chambers.

```