If I Can't Have Love, I Want Power (film)

*This article is about **the film**. You may be looking for **the album of the same name**.*

## General information

### Music by

Halsey
Trent Reznor
Atticus Ross

### Distributed by

IMAX
UMG (on behalf of Capitol Records)

### Running time

50 minutes

***If I Can’t Have Love, I Want Power*** is a 2021 film written by Halsey and directed by Colin Tilley, that accompanies her fourth album of the same name. The film was announced on July 13, 2021 with tickets going on sale on August 3, 2021. It premiered globally in select *IMAX* theaters.

The film is dedicated to Alev Aydin and "our greatest ERA yet." ERA are the initials of Ender Ridley Aydin.

## Background

The film was first hinted at when the "@iichliwp" *Instagram* started following *IMAX* which is a proprietary system of high-resolution cameras, film formats, film projectors, and theaters on June 4, 2021. Its official announced was accompanied by a trailer on July 13, 2021.  The trailer featured a snippet of the then-unreleased song "Bells in Santa Fe" and was directed by Buddha Jones and produced by the former and Byron Atienza. A second trailer was released on July 29, 2021 and was direted by Jones and again produced by Jones and Atienza. The trailer featured a snippet of "I am not a woman, I'm a god".

## Synopsis

The trailer revealed that the film is about "the lifelong social labyrinth of sexuality and birth. The greatest horror stories never told were buried with the bodies of those who died in that labyrinth..."

The IMAX listing further gave further information on the film's story:

"*If I Can't Have Love, I Want Power, an hour-long film experience set to the music of Halsey's upcoming album, introduces a young pregnant Queen, Lila, as she wrestles with the manipulative chokehold of love to ultimately discover that the ability to create life (and end it) unlocks the paranormal power within her.*"
—*IMAX* synopsis

## Plot

The film begins with men on horses riding to the castle. Queen Lila, distressed, is running to a study, and when she arrives, she finds that the king has died. She stares into a mirror and finds Lilith, a woman who looks just like her, in a dark outfit with red hair and smudged makeup. Lila begins studying her reflection. causing suspicion from the court members around her, as Lilith walks away. Lila runs out to the balcony. Members of the court discuss what to do with her while revising a family tree, stating that she's made it clear she won't be going out without a bang. The film then cuts to Lila being prepared for something on a throne. She then rises and slowly walks out onto a balcony, staring blankly into a fiery light (*Bells in Santa Fe*). The kingdom then gathers to mourn the death of the king, while Lila seems to be quite happy about it. She shows a bruise to the Matriarch and an Aristocrat, revealing he would frequently physically abuse her (*1121*). She is then shown lying in bed, when Lilith appears in the room like a ghost and sensually rubbing her dark hands on her before stabbing the queen in the stomach, which appears to impregnate her (*Whispers [Instrumental]*). Lila wakes up from this nightmare and rushes to pull out seeds from a drawer and urinate on them to test if she is pregnant. She looks in the mirror, seeing Lilith's hands rubbing her stomach, and decides to go to a bathhouse to relax, continuing to study her reflection and finding the hands are still there, causing her to flee (*Lilith*). To celebrate the king's death, Queen Lila gathers her friends and has a day out, getting incredibly drunk and causing mayhem in the village by destroying vendors' merchandise and being a general public nuisance. She then tries to ride back to the castle before she falls off her horse and it runs away (*Girl is a Gun*). She drunkenly wanders around the forest, stumbling upon a witch's cabin, and the witch feels her stomach and begins teaching Lila a lamaze breathing technique, causing her to become frightened and run away, and find her way back to the castle. Stumbling back up to her bedroom, she finds that the seeds she urinated on earlier have sprouted, angering her. In her rage, she knocks over a bottle of wine and it shatters on the ground. At 3 months of pregnancy, she becomes unable to get out of bed, while maids try to tug at her to make her stand up. At 4 months, she tries to drink away the feeling, and quickly vomits the alcohol out. At 5, she stands outside of her room and glumly stares out. At 6, she's put on a table and the maids preform a spell on her. At 7, she bathes and pushes down her stomach into the water. At 8, she watches as her friend flirts with a boy, longing for fun like that. Finally at 9 months, she's put on trial and the Aristocrat proclaims that she is nothing but a common widow due to her being of non-royal blood, sentencing her unborn child to death if it is a girl, or raising it in court if it's a boy, and sentencing her to beheading for treason and wickedness. This infuriates the queen, who walks out to the lake to drown herself and her child, but changes her mind and swims up when she feels it kick (*The Lighthouse*). Later, her water breaks and she goes into labor, fleeing from the castle again, trying to find the Witch's cabin to give birth in a more safe area. A maid tells the Aristocrat that she's run away, causing him and the guard to start a manhunt. As she runs, she follows an owl to the cabin, and the witch helps her push out the baby, while Lila flashes back to the night the king died, revealing she had poisoned his wine, and he raped and impregnated her. He collapses and deceases just after. Soon after she gives birth to the child, the Aristocrat and guards find her, burning down the cabin and tossing her onto a wagon back to the castle (*Easier than Lying*). Lila wakes up in a cell, which had been unlocked by someone unknown, as she finds all the guards around it are dead. She makes her way to the nursery and maids are frightened when she picks the baby up from its crib and greets it. It's revealed what she was being prepared for in the beginning of the film was her very own beheading. She carries the baby with her to the guillotine, then gives it to a maid as she's locked into it and smiles (*I am not a woman, I'm a god*). She thinks about what would have been if she had been loving instead of being corrupted by the power of being a queen, fantasizing a peaceful life with her child (*Darling*). Snapping awake from this fantasy, she begins chuckling to herself for unknown reasons, before being abruptly beheaded, while Lilith gazes around the area, seemingly disappointed. As credits roll, she wanders about the castle and over the dead bodies of the guards and Aristocrat, picking up the crown and studying it, before she leaves, ending the film (*Ya'aburnee*).

## Cast

* Halsey as Queen Lila/Lilith
* Sasha Lane as The Witch
* Brian Caspe as The Aristocrat
* Celebic Vuk as The King
* Marie Kaderabkova as The Matriarch

## Release

The film was shown in select *IMAX* theaters globally on August 25 and August 26, 2021 respectively. Tickets went on sale on August 3, 2021. Due to the COVID-19 pandemic restricting the seating areas in many theaters, additional shows were added later on. On October 7th, 2021, the film released on the streaming service HBO Max.

## Music

The film is based on the music from the album of the same name. However, it has some songs from the album excluded, and songs play in different order.

The songs in the film, in order, are:

1. Bells in Santa Fe
2. 1121
3. Whispers (Instrumental)
4. Lilith
5. Girl is a Gun
6. The Lighthouse
7. Easier than Lying
8. I am not a woman, I'm a god
9. Darling
10. Ya'aburnee

## Trailers

If I Can’t Have Love, I Want Power – Film TrailerIf I Can't Have Love, I Want Power - woman-god Trailer
## References

1. ↑ 1.0 1.1 1.2 *Twitter* - @halsey - "Experience “If I Can’t Have Love, I Want Power” the hour-long film event in @IMAX. Tickets on sale August 3rd. http://loveandpower.com
2. ↑ 2.0 2.1 *Love and Power* - "GLOBAL IMAX SHOWINGS, CITIES AND THEATERS TO BE ANNOUNCED; Retrieved: July 15 2021 4:49PM CEST
3. ↑ 3.0 3.1 3.2 *IMAX Berlin* - Synopsis of film