Team Phoenix

Also known as Squid Squad, this team is full of the most badass and adorable kiddos Hogwarts has to offer, plus their fearless Fun-geon Master, also known as God, or Phoenix King, Mark.

## Party Members

Jane Winstanley — Slytherin Rogue, played by Indira

Arletta Thompson — Ravenclaw Cleric, played by Maren

Spencer Knight — Gryffindor Sorcerer, played by Selethel

Thea Knoll — Ravenclaw Bard, played by Camryn

## Memorable Quotes

Camryn: "The only loot I know is the lute"

Mark, as Dracula Milfoy: "There's a reason they call me the Napoleon of heist masterminds."

Camryn: "Because you failed?"

Maren: "Because you're short?"

Indira: "Because you got syphilis?"

Milfoy: "No!"

Mark: "The owl looks at you accusa—acc—accusatorially? Accusatorally? Accusationally? ... It doesn't like you."

Mark: "You have mind-melded with the ferris wheel. This is the first time in history something like this has happened."

Selethel: "Hey, don't mess with me! I'm a whole new kind of bender!"

Mark: "Yes, you're a ferris wheel bender."

Camryn: "Ferris Bender's Day Off"

\*Attacking a demon\*

Selethel: "Do you think throwing a slushie at it would work?

Camryn: "Well, it worked on Glee!"

\*Testing to make sure the slurpie they're about to drink is indeed blue raspberry\*

Mark: "Yeah, it's blue raspberry, so it tastes like garbage."

Mark as Gemma, Thea's little sister who died in a fire as a baby: "I only remember snapshots of my parents. Just two faces, looking down at me in my crib. Saying things like, 'You're our favorite child.' And 'You're going to be the best witch in our family.' And 'Do you smell something burning?' Stuff like that."

Maren: "Hey whatup, I’m Gemma, i’ve been dead since i was a baby, and i never fuckin learned how to read ."

Mark: She is eating from a bag of donut holes.

Selethel: \*Gasp, full of jealousy\* She has donut holes???

Mark: Yeah. It's donut holes, though. Aka it's just an empty bag.

Selethel, trying to tame Cerberus: "What does a demon dog eat?"

Indira: "Demon scooby snacks?"

Indira: "Have we figured out why our wands vibrate when we go up into the air?"

Camryn: "Didn't they teach you that in health class?"

\*We arrive at the 72nd St subway station\*

Mark: "You cast bombarda, and there is a huge explosion. You hear a yelp, and then nothing."

Camryn: "A yelp?"

Selethel: "Yeah, specifically a review for the 72nd St subway station."

Selethel to Thea about her evil alter ego's himbo husband: "Oh my god you're the Yzma to his Kronk!"

Mark, as the party's older selves: "We might be the same people but we are definitely different people."

Mark as those characters: "We don't need therapy, we have power."

Mark to Indira when she gets attacked: "What are you wearing?"

Indira: "Uh... khakis?"

Indira, getting attacked and defending herself: "I cast Sectumsempra and yell 'Not my self you bitch!'"

Maren: "The real monsters are the humans."

Mark: "The real monsters are the friends we made along the way."

## Iconic Items

Wizard Drugs

Thea's ~Sexy~ Hat

Spencer's Ferris Wheel

The MCR (the Mid-California Republic)

## Iconic Locations

Costume Shop

Post-Apocalyptic 7-Eleven, 7-Helleven

Post-Apocalyptic Staten Island, Satan Island

Post-Apocalyptic Wawa, Waaaaaa