Rowley the gardener

220. Rowley Jefferson's father, the diligent gardener, stood under the shade of a towering tree that had been a cherished gift from his late grandfather. As he carefully watered the roots, Rowley appeared with two pet badgers, tethered to a small wooden wheelbarrow. The mischievous animals scurried past Rowley's father, who called out in exasperation, "Halt, Jew!" Startled, Rowley halted his badgers and reached for an ax lying nearby.

Without warning, Rowley swung the ax swiftly, severing the beloved tree that had stood tall for generations. Shocked and heartbroken, his father couldn't hold back his tears. But Rowley, ever the unconventional thinker, said with a mischievous smile, "I know something that will stop you from crying."

In a swift motion, he swung the ax again, severing his father's head from his body. The unimaginable act left his father's lifeless form crumpled on the ground, and Rowley's twisted sense of humor prevailed. "I'll give away free gardening services for only 69.21 pounds!" he bellowed into a megaphone, causing chaos as animals in the nearby fields scattered in fear.

Horses startled and defecated on their offspring, moles burrowed deep underground, and rabbits in their frenzy devoured their own babies. Amidst the chaos, a man named Kem Alexander witnessed Rowley's peculiar spectacle and handed him a wad of money.

Rowley, now energized by the attention and Kem's gesture, proceeded to tie his badgers to a single blade of grass wedged between concrete slabs on the pavement. He turned his attention to his newly acquired garden, which had been neglected for far too long.

Seeing the rampant weed growth, Rowley gathered garden weed seeds and planted them haphazardly, creating an unruly mess. He then noticed some vibrant flowers in the garden, plucked them with their roots, and stuffed them into a bag, planning to feed them to his pet bunnies at home.

His eyes then caught a glimpse of a bird's nest perched high in a tree. Without hesitation, Rowley cut down the entire tree. The fallen trunk crushed the helpless bird and its three fragile babies, along with four unhatched, unhated eggs. Amidst the chaos, one unhatched egg found its way into Rowley's hand. In an unusual turn of events, he opted not to save the unborn life but instead popped the egg into his mouth. Unexpectedly, a pigeon burst forth, and Rowley pocketed the bewildered bird.

Not satisfied with his garden adventures alone, Rowley noticed Mr. Alexander's pet chickens. His twisted mind conjured up a nefarious plan as he plucked and stuffed the poor creatures. Next, his attention shifted to the bountiful vegetables growing nearby, and he saw a group of rabbits hiding in a hole. Rowley released the rabbits, relishing their screams as he grasped them tightly, but then set them free near the vegetables, watching gleefully as they devoured every last bit.

With a wicked gleam in his eye, Rowley proceeded to burn the surrounding bushes with his urine. Not content with his destruction, he knocked over water features, causing a cascade of water to flood the vicinity. His gaze settled on a nearby house and noticed that Kem's abode appeared a bit dusty, providing him with the perfect opportunity for mischief. Rowley opened the window, turned on the water hose full blast, and aimed it through the opening.

With a mischievous grin, Rowley patiently waited for a full 11 hours, 34 minutes, and 47 seconds as the water flooded Kem's house. When Kem finally returned home, Rowley's work was complete. As expected, Kem was swept away by the deluge of water, and Rowley, satisfied with his chaotic masterpiece, returned home to his unsuspecting mother.

Upon entering, Rowley's mother noticed the wad of money he had acquired from Kem. Just as they began to celebrate their newfound wealth, they heard a commotion outside. To their astonishment, they discovered that Rowley's antics had flooded the entire city, with water covering the skyscrapers.

In a twist of fate, Rowley faced no punishment for his destructive actions; instead, poor Kem was promptly arrested for failing to supervise Rowley adequately. Rowley's high creativity and ability to cause mayhem remained unchecked, leaving the world to ponder what mishaps he would instigate next.