Memes

Main article: For Sale: Bevis, Never Scored 1.18.21 transcript

> Like Trump only cares about his own brand and not even like brand beyond himself like to his family, him, because he cannot imagine himself dying. He cannot imagine himself not existing that's why he has to watch TV all day, that's why he has to keep the focus on himself at all times and keep the volume up because he's got to drown out that fucking voice in his head telling him he's going to die.
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> One of my favorite Trump moments ever just as a pure tableau of just monstrous, uh, crudeness was during the campaign I think he was on an airplane, the campaign plane being interviewed and there was a big TV on and it was blaring the Empire Carpet Jingle. This guy's supposed to be a billionaire running for president and he's just glued to the TV like your grandfather which is why they love him because he's the same, there is a identification beyond politics beyond even words and it's a recognition, it's mutual recognition.
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> Just think how many times he has heard the fucking Cellino and Barnes jingle and, uh the Empire Carpet jingle in his life. How many times has he heard the catheter ads that they play on Fox News.
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> *It's my money and I need it now. You have a structured settlement and you need cash now.*
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> The people whose have those songs in their head all the time are unemployed loser types and failed sons such as myself, uh, and old retired people and the pres—the literal president of the literal United States.
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> I was always wondering about the J.G. Wentworth thing. How many calls do they get a day of from people going ’hey I want one of those structured settlements’. How many times does the does the person at that uh hotline number have to say no we can only restructure an existing settlement we can't get you one. I would probably to have fun kind of be like well if you want a structured settlement here's what you do you go down to the grocery store you find a nice recently, uh, mopped piece of, uh, floor and you just eat shit and hopefully on camera, uh, in front of witnesses if possible. Make sure to just go totally ham on it though you can't you can't pussy foot you got to really, really, really commit to hitting your head on the fucking floor.
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> *Call J.G. Wentworth 877 cash now.*
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> Damn it well that's gonna be in my head for the rest of the day fantastic.
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> Oh god vaginal mesh ooh that's got to be one of the grimmest jobs is at the call center the vaginal mesh lawsuit number caught people calling in to tell you about their mesh mishaps. Their vaginal mesh mishap, their vaginal mesh mishaps, vaginal mess, hmm. Vaginal mesh mishaps vaginal mesh mitts, hm. Vaginal mesh mishaps, vaginal mesh mishaps, vaginal mesh mishaps there we go did it three times very proud of myself.
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> Yes, please clip that that should be a clip. Clipping is disabled maybe because, uh, I'm getting cancelled too much I don't know I never, just said I never disabled it. I don't know how I wouldn't know how to go about doing that. I still don't know how they get these little pictures of me in the in the chat I don't know how that works. Like hey there's a little me what's going on. Hey there I am hey I was hoping someone would post that. My little face there he is hey. Adorable.
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> *J.G. Wentworth 877 cash now.*
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> Wonderful, it's wonderful what you have in your brain instead of memories and feelings and connections to other people you just have this, these broken toys of jingle shards and slogans and context-less phrases. Pontypool really was really was this prophetic film. So much of our, uh, our berserk moment I think obviously at every level it's being forced and exacerbated by the continual you know pressure of worsening conditions, of worsening of greater precarity remember it's about precarity it's not about absolute conditions sense, sense of felt precarity and lack of control. On top of that just everybody's head being filled every day with more—like we used to have three memes a year. There used to be three memes a year and two of them came from Super Bowl commercials. Now you get three memes a day. How are you supposed to have a brain? How are you supposed to be able to think with that noise in your head at all times?
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> Yes, I am grandpa Simpson but some of the older chokes will remember in the pre-internet era not even pre-internet, pre-like social media era. There were very few, uh, things in a year that like would become a cultural reference point and a lot of them were commercials specifically Super Bowl commercials. You'd sit and you watch the Super Bowl and one of the big things you would do is you would pay attention for the big ad, Wassup, Budweiser Frogs and then that would last you for six months.
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> The Bud Bowl does anyone remember the Bud Bowl? They had the little bottles play football and we were supposed to get all excited about who was gonna win, oh man. Tastes great less filling. Doritos did a number of them, the Dally Larder, no I know that was not her name I can't remember her name but there's a a woman who like got an acting career because she was sexy in a Doritos commercial. It was not Ali Larter i think her name was Allie something. She married Mario Lopez I think and then they got divorced very quickly after that. Ali Landry they're saying let me check. Yep that was her, she sexily ate a Dorito and became famous for it, different time.
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> So yeah if I have any advice for anyone it's uh, limit your own meme intake because if you just let yourself indulge in memes willy-nilly you are going to get meme diabetes. So it's up to you to limit your meme intake no more than I'd say a meme you know what, a meme a week, you get one meme a week. See if that can handle if you can handle that. All right bye-bye.
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