2022 Season: Week 5 Preview

Week 5 Matchups:

**Divisional Play**

Big Will Division:

**Marquee Matchup**

Glizzy Gladiators (1-3, 1-1 Away) at Tent City Skelton Crew (0-4, 0-2 Home):

-Line: Skeleton Crew -21

Something must give in this highly anticipated matchup between two former championship squads. On one hand, the Gladiators look to bounce back after their 49-point pounding at the hands of Becky Got Back, as they don’t want a repeat of last year’s 11th place finish. On the other hand, the Skelton Crew look to put a full game together for once as they fight to get into to the win column. Don’t let the numbers fool you, even though they are giving up a league high 547 points (136.75 pts/game, per ELIAS Sports Bureau) their week-to-week performances have been improving (170, 140, 120, 117). Plus, with the Skeleton Crew opening as 21-point favorites this could finally be their week to break into the win column.

Games to Watch:

Delly’s Driving Instructors (3-1, 1-0 Away) at The Winter Foxes (2-2, 0-2 Home)

-Line: PUSH

The Driving Instructors look to get back into the win column as they bring their 2nd ranked offense into Elite Stadium to take on the Winter Foxes 9th ranked defense. The Foxes are coming off a win against division juggernaut Throat Goats and momentum could carry into a win over the reeling Driving Instructors. Note: the Foxes are currently winless at home, this does not bode well for them against a team undefeated on the road.

Wood Choppers (2-2, 2-0 Away) at Becky Got Back (3-1, 2-0 Home)

-Line: Becky Got Back -22

The Wood Choppers hope to keep it close as their 3rd ranked defense visits Becky’s Snack Shack against a team that just can’t seem to lose at home. Becky’s 4th ranked offense looks to be on display as they attempt to put an end to the Wood Choppers 1 game win streak.

Julia Hadlock Conference:

**Marquee Matchup**

15in Chocking Hazard (3-1, 1-0 Away) at Waddle Tua Title (2-2, 0-1 Home)

Line: Chocking Hazard -30 (Published while Jonathon Taylor was still starting for WTT)

Push comes to shove as two of the more recent championship owners come to blows in division play that sees both teams fighting to get back into the win column. While their last place offense has been stagnant (353 points, 88.25 pts/game) they look to rebound against a Chocking Hazard team whose defense seem to be a chocking hazard unto themselves (480 points, 120 pts/game). Chocking Hazard and their top ranked offense (511 points, 127.75 pts/game) find themselves in unfamiliar territory after their forfeit loss last week (just their third since week 10 of the 2020 Season) but their owner claims it was a matter of principal that they lost, with Cozens claiming he’d rather “forfeit the game than give the MAGAgoolz the satisfaction of winning anything.”

Games to Watch:

Deshaun’s Parlor (2-2, 1-1 Away) at The Holiest Yields (1-3, 0-1 Home)

Line: PUSH

Both squads look to continue their winning ways as Deshaun’s Parlor marches into Keystone Stadium to matchup with The Holiest Yields (fresh off of stealing Geno Smith off the waiver wire from Chocking Hazard). While the game is seen as fairly even by Vegas, it should be noted that Yields are winless at home playing a team coming off a 46-point victory the week prior, bet accordingly.

BlueLivesMatter MAGAgoolz (4-0, 3-0 Away) at Full Moon Raccoons (1-3, 1-0 Home)

Line: MAGA -2

The Raccoons look to win one for the League as the undefeated MAGAgoolz come to town for their fourth road game of the year (banned from hosting games after revelations of their racist owner John Balsamo). The MAGAgoolz “top ranked defense” looks to continue their streak of ~~luck~~ “dominance against the Raccoons 10th ranked offense. Time will tell if the MAGAgoolz finally get what’s coming to them.

Interdivisional Play:

AB’s CTE (2-2, 0-1 Away) at Throat Goats (2-2, 1-2 Home)

Line: Goats -17

Sparks look to fly as AB’s CTE come to Throat Goat Stadium to face the buzzsaw that is their 3rd ranked offence. The Throat Goats are trying to find their footing after a tough loss to the Winter Foxes, while AB’s CTE look to continue their dominant ways after their 69-point drubbing of Wattle Tua Title.