Space e-Girlfriend

### Locations

Space Tree's Classroom, Space Tree's Ship, The Commander's Ship, The Land of Ghosts

### Characters (in order of appearance)

Space Tree, The Commander, Allon, Pinkfrosting88, Tarbob, Stabby McGee, Skoop, Ghosts

## Credits

### Credits

db terjesen

The Commander gets a call from his internet girlfriend, who wants to meet him IRL (in real life). Allon pretends to be the Commander's mother, who turns out to be dead even though she was alive 2 episodes ago. I guess she died during episode 7. This episode is pretty long... the longest, even.

## Transcript

*(roll opening credits)*

*(Cut to the classroom)*

**SPACE TREE:** Now I can't stress this enough, but it's of the utmost importance that you understand that triangles are the key to everything.

*(the Commander's cell phone rings, waking up Allon)*

**SPACE TREE:** They're the light, they're the way... and whose phone is that ringing now?

**COMMANDER:** Oh, sorry, heh. It's mine. I'll-I'll just answer-

**SPACE TREE:** No, turn it off. All right? You're not supposed to have them on in here.

**COMMANDER:** Shut up. I'll just see who it is.

*(the SPACEPHONE reads "incoming call: xxxPinkFrosting88xxx- this is who is calling")*

**SPACE TREE:** No, just please- just turn it off-

**COMMANDER:** Sssh-ssh-shh! *(whispering, up close) I've gotta take this.*

*(He leaves.)*

**SPACE TREE:** Ugh. One day I'm just gonna take that phone and throw it... at you, Allon! Yeah, you heard me.

*(cut to somewhere else on Space Treebeard's ship; the screen is cut in half, and PinkFrosting88 appears)*

**COMMANDER:** Hello?

**Pinkfrosting88:** Hey, what's up? It's Pinkfrosting88 here.

**COMMANDER:** Yeah, I know, I read the Caller ID.

**Pinkfrosting88:** Oh, you've got that caller ID, huh? Must be rich.

**COMMANDER:** Yeah well, I do alright, being a Space Captain and all. My skillz pay the billz!

**Pinkfrosting88:** Yeah, I bet they do. So, anyway, I was thinking, that maybe, y'know, I should come down there, and come see you.

**COMMANDER:** W-w-why would you do that?

**Pinkfrosting88:** Y'know, we can -so we can, uh, meet each other... face-to-face.

**COMMANDER:** W-why would- why would you want to do that?

*(cut to Space Tree and Allon)*

**ALLON:** Uh, Mr. Space Tree? Are we gonna continue the lesson, or whatever?

**SPACE TREE:** No! If he doesn't come back soon... you get a detention!

**ALLON:** Oh, come on! What the- Gimme a phone, I have an idea.

**Pinkfrosting88:** Look, it's not that complicated. I'm saying we meet each other IN REAL LIFE. Huh? *(Crosses eyes)*

**Commander:** Um, I'm still not really following you here.

**Pinkfrosting88:** It's not that complicated, kid. I'm coming to your ship, and that's all there is to it.

*(Commander's phone rings again)*

**Commander:** Hold on a second, I've got a call on the other line.

**Pinkfrosting88:** Yeah, you're a busy man.

*(Commander pushes a button on his phone. Another line is drawn to split the screen into 3. Allon is seen holding a phone in the bottom segment. Space Tree joins him.)*

**Commander:** Hello?

**Allon:** Hello... *(Changes voice to be more female)* Hello, Commander! Uh, this is your mother calling you! Heh.

**Commander:** *(Surprised)* Mom??? I-I thought you were dead.

*(PinkFrosting88 wanders out of her panel.)*

**Allon:** (To Space Tree) Man, his Mom is dead.

**Space Tree:** Yeah, I know, it just makes things funnier. Keep going.

**Allon:** Uh, yeah. I'm calling you from the Land of ghosts.

**Commander:** *(Confused)* What?

**Allon:** The Land of Ghosts is what I said. *(Space Tree wanders off)* It's- it's where the dead go after they're- after they die.

**Commander:** Really?

**Allon:** *(Angrily)* Yeah, Who's the dead one here, me, I'm the one who knows where we're going, alright? What, you think we go to heaven or something? *(PinkFrosting88 walks through her panel)* No! There's none of that heaven bullshit up here, its all about Land of the Ghosts, motherf\*\*\*er! That's right, I said it!

**Commander:** *(Surprised)* Mom, calm down. You never used to swear this much at me.

**Allon:** Well, y'know, that's how everyone talks in ghost land. They're all pissed off about being dead. What can I say.

*(Commander's cell phone rings yet again.)*

**Commander:** Well uh, hold on a second, I got another call.

*(PinkFrosting88 walks by upside down in her segment.)*

**Allon:** I got plenty of time to hold on, I'm being dead and all.

*(Commander pushes a button on his phone, a 4th quadrant is drawn, containing Space Tree.)*

**Commander:** Hello.

**Space Tree:** Hello Commander, this is your father speaking.

**Commander:** Dad? Uh, hi. What's up?

**Space Tree:** I am calling you from the Land of Ghosts!

**Commander:** What!? When-When'd you die? I thought- *(Sad)* what happened?

**Space Tree:** Oh, uh, actually, uh, I was just kidding. I'm still alive.

**Commander:** Oh, psh. You got me. Always with the "I'm dead" jokes. Hold on a minute, I've got like 10 people on the other lines.

**Space Tree:** Alright.

*(Commander pushes a button on his phone)*

**Commander:** Hey PinkFrosting88?

**Allon:** Uh, *(Very high pitched voice)* YES? This is me.

**Commander:** Mom?

**Allon:** Yeah, it's me. You've got the wrong line. (*Space Tree wanders out of his panel*)

**Commander:** Yeah, nice try though.

*(Commander pushes a button on his phone)*

**Commander:** PinkFrostin88?

**PinkFrosting88:** Yeah, what's taking you so long over there?

**Commander:** Yeah, sorry about that, my parents are on the other lines.

**PinkFrosting88:** Oh... you don't live with them, do you?

**Commander:** No no, they're on the phone, they're not here.

*(Allon ducks in his square. He then holds up an Allon puppet and a Commander puppet, and waves them around.)*

**PinkFrosting88:** Oh, that's cool then. Well then I'll just come over right now, with the teleporter machine. You said your ship is a big blue thing with some white stripes? *(Screen shows Space Tree's ship.)*

**Commander:** Yeah, uh, next to that one. *(The camera shifts to see Commander's ship.)* The green thing with some guns on it. *(The screen goes back to the phone call, only Commander's and PinkFrosting88's sections are shown.)* Cuz I got the big guns baby!

**PinkFrosting88:** All right, all right. I'll see you when I get there.

**Commander:** Actually I'm not in my ship right now. It's completely empty with no security.

**PinkFrosting88:** Oh, OK. No one's watching it?

**Commander:** No one's watching the inside of it.

**PinkFrosting88:** Oh, all right, that's even better.

**Commander:** What do you mean -

*(PinkFrosting88's side goes to static. Commander's phone rings again. As he answers, Tarbob appears in PinkFrosting88's section)*

**Commander:** Uh, Hello?

**Tarbob:** Hello, I'm from a REAL insurance company and today we're offering free insurance on any space ships that you currently own.

**Commander:** Free insurance, huh? Now why would I, a successful space admiral, need something like that?

**Tarbob:** Well we just want to make sure you'll be covered in the unfortunate event that your ship is damaged, destroyed, or most likely STOLEN.

**Commander:** What am I, a sucker? Psh. *(Turns head)* I'm looking out the window right now at my ship, and it's fine. It's just sitting there, and now it's powering up, and now it's flying away into the distance. So as you can see, I... uh... hold on a second.

*(Commander's phone rings again. A line is drawn to split the screen into 3.)*

**Commander:** Yeah?

**PinkFrosting88:** Hey, I just stole your ship! That was me in there.

**Commander:** Oh, it was you?

**PinkFrosting88:** Yup. Thanks by the way, for the free ride.

**Commander:** Yeah, don't, mention it. Uh, you gunna bring it back?

**PinkFrosting88:** Well now that would just kind of defeat the purpose of stealing it, wouldn't it?

**Commander:** Yeah, uh, you're right. Are you gunna be online tonight?

**PinkFrosting88:** Nah, probably not. See ya. *(The bottom half goes to static.)*

**Commander:** Bye, uh. Hmm. *(Commander pushes a button on the screen, the 2nd line is erased.)* Hey, insurance guy? On second thought, I would like some of that free insurance.

**Tarbob:** Well in order to obtain this free insurance, I'm going to need your credit card number.

**Commander:** Well of course. It's 222-2222-223.

**Tarbob:** Thanks! It checks out on our computer system! Chk! Y'know, that was a pretty dumb thing you just did, giving your credit card number to some guy over the phone.

**Commander:** Yeah, I'm going for a hat trick today.

**Tarbob:** ... What's a hat trick.

**Commander:** It-It's y'know, like, 3 in a row.

**Tarbob:** Well why don't you just say that.

**Commander:** Well I was just-

**Tarbob:** Or better yet, say 3 of a KIND. Cuz after all, life is one big poker game. *(Full screen on Tarbob, the camera shifts to reveal a poster that says "Life is one big poker game...with REAL INSURANCE")*.

**Commander:** What?

*(Zoom out to see Commander on a card. A black hand holds a hand of 1 GS card, 3 Commander cards, and 1 88 card.)*

**Skoop:** Hey, three of a kind. Read 'em and whizzle.

*(Show Stabby McGee over a MONEY board game.)*

**Stabby McGee:** Hey your piece just landed on Land of the Ghosts. That means you owe me 400$ and go directly to jail. Wouldn't be the first time, am I right? *(Points a finger at Skoop)* Y'know what I'm saying?

**Skoop:** *(Slides in and crunches up Stabby's arm)* Land of the ghosts? What- you just wrote that on there. *(Cut to see the board, where the "MAYFLY" square has been crossed out and someone has written "Land of th' Ghoasts = $400 Skoop go to jail)*

**Stabby McGee:** So what, it's my game, I'm allowed to.

*(Cut out to see Stabby on a TV. A ghost comes into the picture. A laugh track plays.)*

**Ghost 1:** Come quick they're mentioning our homeland on the television again!

**Ghost 2:** Will you shut up I'm on the phone with my son here!

*(End credits roll.)*

## Fun Facts

* First Apperance of Pinkfrosting88, Tarbob, Stabby McGee and Skoop.
* Longest episode of Space Tree to date, clocking in at 7 minutes.
* In the Flash file for the episode it can be seen that the number buttons on the Commander's 'spacephone' are arranged '3 1 4' across the top row, and '- 5 9' across the second row, an unusual layout for a phone... A, space, phone...
* The Flash animation's window size increases in this episode.

## References

* Space Tree mentions Triangles.
* In this episode, Phones are heavily used.
* As the episode description says, the Commander's Mom must have died in Space Girlfriend, as she was still alive in Space Vision. However, in Career Fear she seems to be alive again.