Back To The Past

Jump into this wild, time-travel adventure! Our latest back-to-the-future-esque sketch focuses on the highs and lows of meddling with the space-time continuum!

## Transcript

Aaron: Erica, I really hope you had a good time today.
Tori: Yeah, I did!
Aaron: I, uh, wanted to ask you something.
Tori: Yeah?
Aaron: Erica-
Tori: Oh.
Aaron: Will you marry me?
Tori: Oh my goodness, yes! Absolutely, yes!

Stephen: Mikey, I'm you from the future!
Aaron: Wow, cool!
Stephen: Come here for a second, I need to talk to you!
Aaron: Oh, okay, I guess.
Stephen: Alright, listen, I came back to this exact moment in history...
Aaron: Wow.
Stephen:... to try to save the world.
Aaron: Okay, wow, this is huge! Okay.
Stephen: Yeah, yeah, yeah, listen. Just shut up for a second and listen.
Aaron: I'm sorry.
Stephen: Alright, I need you to do something big.
Aaron: Alright.
Stephen: You're probably not going to like it.
Aaron: Tell me.
Stephen: Dump Erica.
Tori: What?
Aaron: What?
Tori: No! Why would he need to dump me to save the world?
Stephen: Oh, eavesdrop much, Erica? See, she can't even respect a private conversation. Just drop her, man.
Aaron: Are you insane? We love each other!
Stephen: Yeah, whatever! Look, I know every bad thing that is going to happen to you. You see this scar? That's from Vietnam II.
Aaron: Okay, what happens? Why should I not marry Erica?
Stephen: Let me tell you. In a few years, she completely lets herself go.
Tori: Rude!
Stephen: Oh, is my perfectly accurate knowledge of the future offending you? Also, you don't know this yet, but she hates puppies.
Tori: No! No, I... I... I don't.
Stephen: Okay, she loves puppies, but she loves, you know, eating them.
Tori: What? What is wrong with you? No!
Aaron: Alright man, tell me the real reason you think we should break up.
Stephen: Alright, fine, I didn't want to have to tell you guys this, but buckle up, because it's going to get dark. On prom night, your daughter kills a guy. It was with her car, it was a total accident, but it messes her up really bad. She gets mixed in with a really shady crowd to deal with the psychological repercussions. Anyway, one night, she says the wrong thing to the wrong guy, and boom, the gangsters show up at the house and start shooting up the whole place. My Erica was the first to go. I got back here just in time to warn you guys, so...

Aaron: Look, Erica, I love you and everything, but...
Tori: It's... it's okay. I understand.

Whitney: Mikey! Are you messing with us in 2017 again?
Stephen: No!
Aaron: Future Erica? You're alive?
Whitney: Of course I'm alive!
Aaron: But he was telling us about your daughter, and the guns, and...
Whitney: We don't have a daughter.
Stephen: Geez, get off my back, Erica!
Whitney: Okay, look. If you come with me now, and stop wasting all our time travel minutes, then maybe we'll get chicken wings for dinner.
Stephen: Boom! That's all I wanted! Alright, yeah, just pretend we weren't here, I guess.

Aaron: What? So this was all about chicken wings?

Stephen: Oh! Thank goodness I'm not too late! You guys, you've got to help me save the world, for real this time!
Aaron: Forget it, man.
Tori: Yeah, you're kind of the worst.
Stephen: No! Don't go! Don't go! Vietnam III! Ah!