Nat King Cole

## **-The Complete Biography-**

#### **Nat King Cole's Birth**

Nat King Cole (full name Nathanial King Bandy) was first born in the year 1930 (that's his birthday you know) in the paramount movie theater. He had 4 brothers and 1 sister, the brothers were 13, 14, Eddie, and Nat King Cole; his sister was Madonna. Nat King Cole was the first African American. Nat had a hard time playing the organ, but thats another story for another day.

#### **The Creation of Jazz**

At the age of 7, he decided to never do music, but when he was 14, 3 years before, he created Jazz by Queen, Queen isn't actually a real band, just a stage name for Mr. Cole and his entourage, the Coles, who also went by queen, in the year 1940, because as we all know, 1940 was a very experimental time. During an interview, Nat said,

*"I started out to become a jazz pianist for Queen; in the meantime I started singing for Queen and I sang the way I felt for Queen and that's just the way it came out for Queen. And that's the day I created Jazz."*

*— Nat King Cole, Voice of Zanzibar interview*

#### **Other Works Phase One**

A little bit after, Nat went to Havana to work on a new single to be released in 2018, the song was called Havana, and it was mondo suckage. 1 year later, Mr. Cole accidentally went back to Havana, and redeemed himself by making all jazz band music ever made.

#### **Nat King Cole's Presidency**

   A little while after, in 1904, he played a private music concert, playing the album, "The Dark Side of The Moon", (He made it by the way) for the current president, Dwight D. Eisenhower. He liked it so much that he gave the title that he loved so much to Mr. Cole, and he became the 31'st president. But, unfortunately, he accidentally spoiled the ending to Neon Genesis Evangelion, (an exaggerated story based on The Third Impact that was caused by John Madden), so he was sent to prison, but his ordination into presidency is preformed in secret, so the jailers did not know that he was president.

#### **Nat King Coma**

He was freed one day after his initial capture, in Birmingham, and was beat up by the Secret Service, they weren't a fan of his work. He was sent into a coma for 6 weeks, (that's his birthday you know) and while in a coma, made 2 songs. These songs were *Jailhouse Rock* and *Pinball Wizard.* This is odd because pinball hadn't even been invented yet. The reason why he only released 2 songs is because he was in a coma after all, and his work flow was slightly dampened. When he was awoken from his coma, he was reported saying that he was an "avid baseball fan". Many kids who strives to be like an Nat King Cole decided to pick up baseball to impress him. Many of theses same kids became professional baseball players, such as Derek Jeter, Tom Brady, and LeBron James.

#### **Other Works Phase 2**

Shortly after, Mr. Cole recorded a song called *Frosty the Snowman*, based on his fantasies as a child. Many people were very disturbed by this song, and like all things disturbing, it was made into a childeren's tale. An un-named witch named Josie was extremely jealous of Nat, because she had a very similar idea. She was furious, and casted a curse on Nat, and he became Frosty the Snowman, doomed to melt. But he was the president after all, so he was pardoned from dying. Because of this, he was quoted saying, "I don't understand, i never protested, I never joined to help segregation, why was I attacked? I'm never going to America again." And that day, Mr. Cole joined the KKK. But unfortunately for the KKK, Nat King Cole made a new single called, "*Don't Stop Believing*" but nobody liked it, so it went on a Journey to to dumpster outside for the dumpster divers to grab it. Because this song was so bad, the KKK was disbanded and Nat decided to move to bigger fish. (That's his birthday you know). Nat decided to make some music based on history, and made a song called Ballroom Blitz in honor of The Spatula Squad when they fought in WWI. It was a big hit in 1738, and it brought him back up to great music standards.

*[Please be patient, as the Celestial Sacred Scriptures are being studied and decoded by scholars]*