A Close Encounter With The Tails Doll

One late afternoon, I invited a shitload of mah playaz ta play Sonic R fo' realz. As we turned on tha Sega Saturn we was buckwild fo' our racin tournament fo' realz. As we was all up in tha Characta Select screen, I chose tha Tails Doll fo' humor. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. Most of mah playaz was bustin up as they chose Metal Sonic, Metal Knuckles, Mecha Eggman n' Supa Sonic. Lata I won all tha races since I was be expert at dis game. We realised time flew by so mah playaz left.

I still felt like playin vizzle game so I banged mah Sonic n' Sega All Stars Racin disc tha fuck into my

PlayStation 3.

Me n' mah playaz played all dem races online n' a message popped up ta mah screen comin from a user called 'Tails Doll'. I opened it n' it sayed "fuck you". "For what?" I busted his ass a message back ta dis user n' shit. 'Tails Doll' then busted another message sayin "Yo ass won 1st place wit Da Tails Doll, I was watchin yo thugged-out ass." I gots freaked up fo' a second thankin suttin' was watchin over our asses as we was playin Sonic R fo' realz. Another message from 'Tails Doll' sayin "Can YOU feel tha Sunshine?" n' busted mah crazy ass a gangbangin' playa request but i didn't accept it cuz I don't even know whoz ass dis muthafucka is.

I busted all mah playaz a message sayin "Did yo dirty ass peep anybody watchin our asses cuz I gots busted a mes

sage from a User called 'Tails Doll' sayin he peeped mah crazy ass win 1st place wit tha Tails Doll." My fuckin playaz busted back lyrics sayin they don't give a fuck n' wit a "O.O" I searched 'Tails Doll"s flava but it holla'd tha flava don't exist. I immediately turned off tha PlayStation 3 n' used mah laptop ta git all up in tha PSN forums. I done cooked up a thread a

bout mah message encounta wit tha Tails Doll. Users was replyin they also reported gettin lyrics afta playin Sonic R wit Tails Doll fo' realz. An Administrator deleted tha thread callin it "Nonsense". Dat shiznit was 10 PM so I went ta tha Bedroom, turned off tha lights n' slept.

When I raised up tha next mornin I found a lil paper sayin "Dear Richard, I be goin ta bust a cap up in yo' playaz ta show dem dat they is fools, Sincerely THE DOLL." There was a lil blood stain where THE DOLL was read. I freaked up n' threw it up in tha trash n' had a 1,000 mile stare until I gots ta school. I ran inside tha cl

assroom n' screamed ta mah playaz dat they is ghon be capped. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Da mackdaddy thought I was tha Class Clown n' I punished mah crazy ass wit Lunch Detention fo' todizzle.

At Lunch Detention, one of mah peers holla'd dat they heard of tha Tails Doll afta I holla'd at dem mah encounta wit dat shit. What made me git chills up in mah spine is dat tha pimpin' muthafucka holla'd at mah crazy ass I be tha Tails Dollz "vessel". Meanin dat I pleased tha Tails Doll by playin as his ass up in Sonic R. Da moment afta da perved-out muthafucka holla'd that, tha fire alarm rang n' we evacuated tha school. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Smoke was comin from tha 3rd floor n' dat shiznit was a real fire. Dat shiznit was comin from mah classroom.

I came home early do ta tha fire, I holla'd at mah muthafathas bout tha fire but not tha Tails Doll. My fuckin daddy holla'd at

me dat mah uncle n' mah cousins is coming. Luckily mah uncle was a retired veteran so I might have some protection from tha Tails Doll fo' now fo' realz. A few minutes lata I holla'd at mah cousins tha entire rap n' they didn't believe mah dirty ass. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Sayin dat dat shiznit was a phat freaky rap yo, but dis is reality...

Suddenly mah cell beeper was ringin n' dat shiznit was mah playa sayin da thug was havin a party. I gots per

mission from mah muthafathas n' I headed off ta mah playaz crib fo' realz. As I gots there our crazy asses had a pimped out time foolin around, smokin like hell, n' watchin fightz of faded men. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch fo' realz. Afta a while a thugged-out doorbell rang, tha noize was so bangin we couldn't hear it, so tha doorbell rang continously until I noticed tha soundz n' opened dat shit. Dat shiznit was mah olda brutha n' so he joined tha party.

I had a chillover at mah playaz doggy den since dat shiznit was too late ta bounce back ta tha doggy den. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. I raised up at 5:00 AM dat mornin n' found a thugged-out doll dat be lookin like tha Tails Doll from Sonic R. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Since I find no interest up in dolls I gave it ta mah lil sista when I gots home. My fuckin guard was down thankin dat tha doll conspiracy was finally over n' shit. I read mah dadz newspaper n' I jumped outta mah chair when I saw tha headlines. Well shiiiit, it read: "Fire started up in Eisenhower Middle School by unknown entity, 3 fucked up". This unknown entitizzle sounded like tha Tails Doll n' I became paranoid once again. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. I decided ta be a temporary paper pimp ta end mah boredom afta breakfast.

An minute lata all tha papers was tha served up n' tha minutes afta was like casual wit no school fo' realz. As I checked tha mailbox fo' lettas from mah classmates, I stumbled upon a yellow envelope which is like unsual. It aint nuthin but tha nick nack patty wack, I still gots tha bigger sack. I ripped it open wit curiositizzle n' dat shiznit was from 'Yo crazy-ass Secret Killer'. Well shiiiit, it read "My fuckin dear playa, I know where you live, I'ma not bust a cap up in yo' playaz but burn they houses instead fo' even mo' suffering. Will you fuck wit me son?". I ran ta tha nearest trash can n' threw it away n' I attempted ta clear mah mind.

Late dat night, nuff muthafuckin fire trucks came ta nuff muthafuckin houses n' I realized dat letta was straight-up spittin some lyrics ta tha real deal fo' once. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. School reopened tha next dizzle n' what tha fuck happened last night juiced it up ta Fox Shit dat mornin fo' realz. As I entered tha classroom when I came ta school, dem hoes was paranoid just like mah dirty ass fo' realz. And when school was over, as I strutted home, I found a paper sayin "I'ma peep you, Richard." on tha sidewalk. Then, I believed dis Tails Doll was straight-up real.

I ran as fast as I can, when I stopped I saw fresh blood drippin down a storm drain. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. I suddenly became sick n' disgusted by dis horrific crib. I ran even fasta n' was inside mah home n' I locked tha door tight. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Somethang was pokin on me n' so I turned around...nothang was there, so peek-a-boo, clear tha way, I be comin' thru fo'sho. I ran upstairs ta mah room, tha door locked fo' no reason, not a god damn thang was inside. Da lights went up fo' no reason, I heard bangin footsteps comin from tha stairs fo' realz. A red light rocked up, tha lights turned on. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Dat shiznit was tha Tails Doll!!

It holla'd at mah crazy ass up in a thugged-out demonic voice "I'ma show tha error of yo' ways." It took up a knife but turned round n' floated outside, I closed mah eyes up in horror as dat shiznit was cappin' innocent people. Well shiiiit, it came back sayin "Is you happy, knowin you can feel tha sunshine?". Well shiiiit, it gots a big-ass machete n' was locked n loaded ta bust a cap up in me as well. I locked tha door, n' dropped down from tha window. With luck, I landed on tha ground.

Da Tails Doll was furiously slashin all up in tha door, a piece of tha door flew outta tha window

nd tha Dollz dark eyes was glarin all up in mah face. Well shiiiit, it threw tha knife n' it almost hit mah dirty ass. Well shiiiit, it found a cold-ass lil chainsaw n' holla'd at mah crazy ass dat shiznit was bustin a "sacrifice". I jumped all up in a shitload of fences but dat shiznit was too fast, it has a slight cut from tha chainsaw. Drippin wit blood, I ran all up in a alley n' floated straight toward tryin ta slice me tha fuck into two. Before dat shiznit was goin ta bust a cap up in me, I found a wooden cross n' shoved it up in front of his muthafuckin ass yo. Dude burned like dat shiznit was a funky-ass bomb n' blew up like a muthafucka.

I limped mah way back home wit tha chainsaw n' holla'd at mah siblings a unbelievable story.