Episode 12

Jeremy Levick and Rajat Suresh join the girls for an episode that is almost 100% riff.

recapped by Hannah 3/20/22

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## Episode Summary

### Introduction

* We jump right into the episode learning a lot about God, who Broti works for as part of his social media team.
	+ God is protestant and Broti will not be giving out his email on air.
	+ God gets confused during prayer, it's like what happens when you open a window on a plane, which is that you get a really nice breeze, so God really likes church.
* Jeremy starts hinting at the power dynamic between him and Rajat, which is Jeremy dictating things Rajat can do & say, for example what religion is correct.
* Reveal: Dylan and Jeremy went to the same high school. No, they did not. Jeremy went to a different high school in the same district as Dylan. They were peripherally aware of each other. Well, Jeremy didn't think of it as peripheral.
* How did Jeremy and Rajat meet? Answer doesn't actually seem like a joke, they met in college, both wrote for the same comedy publication.
* Friendship mapping - who is the Dylan and who is the Broti? Racewise, Rajat is the Dylan and Jeremy is the Broti. Agewise, same thing. Though everyone is the same age, which is 14.
	+ Not so young that anyone is still swallowing small parts. Jeremy is proud of Rajat for growing out of breastfeeding recently, he now eats normal meals.
	+ Broti supposes: what if instead of growing out of it, your mother's breast started producing real food, like a sandwich?
	+ Dylan is closer to God because she knows it's wrong for a breast to produce a sandwich.
	+ Being a woman is wrong, but it's beautiful.
* God's name is God Schneider. He's Jewish, which is why he's uncomfortable at church. He's one of those white guys that you think might be Middle Eastern, but then it turns out he's Irish.
	+ He wants to do bit parts. He has fun in front of the camera.
	+ Inside Baseball corner from Dylan: at auditions, they do a blood draw for a DNA test before you go in, to test for your racial makeup. Totally alien to Jeremy and Rajat, to the point where Rajat doesn't know what blood is.
	+ Concern about Rajat: does he not have blood? After a meandering exploration that includes the admission that they've never done arts and crafts in front of one another, it is revealed that Jeremy has seen Rajat get injured and there is circuitry under his skin. He's basically an electric car.
	+ All of which is to say, they're both writers, behind the scenes.
* Dylan brings up the theme of the podcast, teaching each other stuff. Since there are two guests, and Jeremy and Rajat are basically a male reboot of Lecture Hall anyway, Dylan and Broti will not be presenting topics this time.
	+ Rajat has never seen men teach women before, so this could be cool.
	+ Women's knowledge is stored in the eggs. Everyone thinks this is true.
	+ What if men were born with all the sperm they would ever have? Like a tank that depletes.
		- What follows is a very strange conversation about how babies do have sperm but aren't allowed to hold it (??) until they are one year old. Jeremy apologizes.
	+ Things evolve, over the course of a show. For example, remember the episode on Whose Line Is It Anyway? when they were all alien surrogates? And then on the series finale, where Colin Mochrie was Wayne Brady's dad?

### Jeremy's topic

* He doesn't know that much about it. It's the book Sapiens, which is a very interesting topic to him, but he has only read 40 pages and doesn't remember much of it. And the information might be wrong.
	+ This is why Jeremy is the Broti. Last week Broti talked about deja vu for 45 minutes, and most of it probably wasn't true.
* Two pieces of actual information:
	+ There is a theory that Homo sapiens' ability to create fictions, like believing in God, gave us an advantage over the other species in the Homo genus, and is why we outlast them. Collective myth-making and the ability to work together.
	+ You know the standard diagram for evolution from monkey to human? They all existed at the same time. They're just different types of guys.
		- The prehistoric Abbey Road. They all evolve into Ringo.
		- A chiropractor would come every three thousand years and make them stand up a little straighter. Cracking their backs and giving them a standing desk.
		- That would be a great New Yorker cartoon. Discussion of how the four way credit for this idea would work, Dylan would love to have "words in the New Yorker" in her bio.

### Interlude

* Interruption: Jeremy's doorbell rang. It's Broti.
* Back to how well Jeremy and Dylan knew each other during high school. Turns out they knew of each other during school, but hung out in groups a few times toward the end.
	+ Who was more popular? Rajat will decide. He chooses Jeremy, because he was in a band.
	+ But Dylan was on an episode of SVU, and didn't tell anyone about it, which is an even cooler thing to do. Case closed.
	+ The last time Jeremy saw Dylan was in a basement in Philly near Drexel. He remembers she was fun to talk to.
* Rajat used to live in a basement. No not really, that was just a bit.
	+ Everyone is impressed by Rajat's ability to come up with that bit so quickly.
	+ Is the improv rule "yes, and" or "yes, please"? Didn't Amy Poehler invent improv?
* Now that the government's rule is to stay 6 feet away from one another, people with restraining orders against them (Dylan & Jeremy for Amy Poehler & Matt Besser, respectively) can now be much closer, it replaces the rule.
* Lots of meta-talk about the craft of comedy and how these comedians' brains work so quickly and impressively to produce the jokes we know and love.

### Back to Jeremy's topic

* Dylan points out that it's been almost an hour (40 minutes) and no one has taught each other anything. Jeremy protests and she points out that he didn't even explain what Sapiens is.
	+ Jeremy proceeds to do a pretty bad job explaining what "the homo genus" is. Invokes dogs.
	+ Broti interjects to succinctly explain what Jeremy is getting at.
	+ But then she makes a cruel joke about Dylan. Everyone feels bad for Dylan, but she's used to it. Broti apologizes and thanks them for calling her in. Jeremy and Rajat believe in redemption.
* Jeremy relates his experience of teaching - he felt pretty good at first once he got going, but then later felt bad that he had failed to give context and it kind of fell apart.
	+ Acknowledges that Broti is better at explaining this than he is.
	+ This is the all-male race-swapped version of Lecture Hall. Half is white-washed, half is really woke.

### Rajat's topic

* How to hang with Jeremy
* So far, we've been doing a pretty good job at hanging out with Jeremy.
	+ Talking about God up top - Jeremy likes to know how everyone stands, faith-wise. Usually he asks Rajat for a sidebar to confirm.
	+ He has though been texting Rajat a cross emoji and a question mark, so Rajat can say yes or no.
* Be nice. Jeremy likes it when people are nice to him, especially in comparison to how others are being treated.
* Jeremy loves nasty stuff like pee pee and poo poo. Conflict: Dylan does NOT like hearing about that stuff before 4pm or after 4:45pm.
* Jeremy asks if any of the rules are more specific to him, Rajat points out that he already made his whole topic about Jeremy.
* Jeremy agrees to talk about how to hang with Rajat for like a second.
	+ Make sure to get Rajat a diet coke. A new one, because he can tell if it's one you brought from home from the pungent odor. He gets really mad otherwise.
* Don't talk about Trump with Jeremy. He gets really mad and his face gets red. A visual element as Jeremy makes a funny face.
	+ He's mad on behalf of Barron, who is extremely tall because they're giving him the same thing they gave to Kendall Jenner, which also makes you not Armenian.
	+ Broti reveals that her ethnicity also changes as she grows, she's not always Indian. Rajat confirms that he used to be Jewish, and Jeremy also used to be Indian. For Dylan however, being Jewish is really important to her.

* This is the Hannukah episode, which probably explains the religion theme throughout.
	+ Who are the Hannukah guys? The Maccabees, Jeremy and Rajat, or just any Orthodox Jewish guy?

* What is it like to hang out with Dylan or Broti? No one cares, which is fine.
* Dylan relates the events of April 13th, including the way that Ava DuVernay did not acknowledge the mistake, for example did not offer Dylan a role in a movie as a racist white person.
* Broti takes this opportunity to insult Dylan and immediately apologize, which Dylan points out is not fair. The conversation devolves into race-ranking, but Rajat is just happy to be on the podium.

* Jeremy is back with another Sapiens fact even though it's not his turn anymore.
	+ Humans can only know 150 people. Broti can only know 5.
	+ Knowing 151 people and having to cut one would be a great premise for a Jim Carrey movie. Jeremy does not care about the Grinch because he is not a member of homo sapiens.

* Trying not to start a new bit at the end of the show. Someone has to say "no". It's bedtime now, and a snowstorm is coming, which Dylan is jealous of.

* Jeremy pulls up a song to play out the podcast. It is nearly inaudible until he turns it up, at which point it sounds terrible. It is George Harrison.