Ralph

**Ralph** is a stable groom-turned Royal Head Groom of the Hamster Kingdom/Prince of the Second Crag of Extreme Lower Batavia in the Kingdom of Bats.

## History

### Hamster Princess: Whiskerella

Initially, Ralph was an ordinary groom working in King Hamsterbone's quail stables. During a particular masquerade ball held in honor of the bat ambassador, Ralph was intrigued by the arrival of a coach pulled by strange white quail. He was perturbed to see that the coachmouse remained sitting on the coach throughout the ball, rather than coming in to relax with the other coachmice. Ralph later reported these observations to Harriet Hamsterbone, who was curious about the mysterious and beautiful owner of the coach.

To his discomfort, Ralph was approached by Harriet again-with him telling her his name on this occasion-to alert her if the strange coach appeared again at a second masquerade ball. Over his own protests, Harriet insisted that Ralph come and find her at the ball and inform her of the stranger's arrival. When the coach did arrive, Ralph briefly conversed with the owner, and kindly delivered an invitation for the coachmouse to leave the carriage and come inside. He also expressed concern for her quail, who seemed to run rather oddly, making him think they might be affected by wobbly quail.

The stranger's beauty left Ralph tongue-tied after this exchange, and he quickly sped off to alert Harriet as to the stranger's arrival. When the stranger arrived in the ballroom, Ralph was horrified, knowing that she would recognize him. Harriet distracted the stranger to give Ralph time to escape, though he suffered another panic-inducing incident when he was mistaken for a prince and asked to dance. Ralph later reported this to Harriet, who advised him to claim that he was infected with leprosy if he ever found himself in such a situation again. Ralph found this suggestion objectionable, but was soon forced to follow after Harriet as she went to investigate the quail.

Harriet and her friend Prince Wilbur later learned that the stranger's name was Ella, and that she had been sent to the balls by her fairy godmouse in order to meet a prince. However, Ella found all the princes to be either uninterested in her or unbearable; Ralph was the only individual she'd met who had impressed her as being both polite *and* kind. Thinking that Ralph might be the answer to the fairy godmouse problem, Harriet contemplated arranging for him to become a prince and setting him up with Ella. However, she saw no way of doing this without either her parents or Wilbur's mother adopting him, neither of which seemed an ideal solution.

Ralph was later present in the stables when Ella arrived for a third masquerade ball, this one hosted by the bat ambassador. He and Ella spoke briefly, with Ella noting that her "other" quail-in reality a pair of transformed newts-had been taken to the vet to be treated for wobbly quail based on his recommendation. She also asked him to take special pair of her "new" quail, which were in fact Wilbur and Harriet. After Ella went, unwillingly, into the ball with the fairy godmouse, Ralph lamented that in the two times he had spoken to her their conversation had largely revolved around quail foot disease.

Harriet attempted to communicate with Ralph, who had the ability to understand quail, but was unable to do so due to the godmouse's spell. Ralph was later summoned to the ballroom to deal with Harriet, Wilbur, and Mumfrey, who had all made their way there to deal with the fairy godmouse. With Mumfrey serving as translator, Ralph was able to inform King Hamsterbone of the true identities of the strange quail. When Ella's true appearance was revealed to the ballgoers, one of the princes made a rude comment about her; Ralph promptly responded by knocking him flat. The king expressed disapproval, but his idea of "punishing" Ralph was to appoint him as the Royal Head Groom.

When Ella slipped during the ensuing final confrontation with her deranged fairy godmouse, Ralph caught her before she could hit the floor. Though once again tongue-tied in her presence, Ralph found Ella grateful and continued to hold her as she snuggled into his embrace. When the godmouse refused to accept this as fulfilling her conditions, as Ralph was not a prince, the bat ambassador intervened and used his diplomatic authority to make Ralph "ruler of the Second Crag of Extreme Lower Batavia". Ralph briefly attempted to object to this appointment, but Ella laid a silencing finger on his lips.

Once the godmouse had made her undignified departure, her spell now broken, Ralph broached the matter with the bat ambassador. The bat ambassador urged him not to worry, as his "dominion" amounted to a small fixture in the bat ambassador's guest bedroom. Ralph was thus left with Ella, who he still had difficulty knowing how to talk to. Fortunately, Ella solved this by taking Ralph by the arm, leading him out of the ballroom, and insisting that he share his considerable knowledge of quail diseases.