Samiad

Samiads are small, furry humanoid creatures, they tend to have stubby arms and legs and chubby features. Their faces have inhumanly pronounced cheekbones with large spherical eyes and two antennae like stubbed appendages on their foreheads.

Samiads are known ground dwellers. Samiads inhabit churches and live in the walls, they prefer to reside in churches as Samiads like the acoustics of the rooms. They often live within the walls of said churches and wait for nightfall to come out. They have a tendency to make noises during this time or mess with the lighting, while this is happening they can usually be seen sprinting through the halls at high speeds. They do not expect people at this time and become defensive upon sighting humans in their domain, they may scream or cause physical harm. Samiads are subterranean creatures, they can live outside of churches, but usually non-church based Samiads are tunneling creatures thus making them unlikely to be encountered in the wild, they tend to tunnel into churches if they find them. Muriel Septim is known to hoard Samiads in her walls as they are Samiads who cannot find churches and were rejected by wider Samiad Society. They don't quite understand what electricity is but they seem to generally agree that it is fun to interact with, this has become a main feature of Samiad infestations resulting in flickering lights and blown fuses.

Samiad names are on the whole unpronounceable by people. Those who speak the Samiad's name will never return to society the same as before, they will not be able to reintegrate.

If someone casts the Samiad Curse they will get provoked and attempt locate and kill the victim of said curse, but if said victim whispers the samiad's name 12 times out their window the curse gets lifted. The illusive Grombandiad is known to be used for many of these curses.

They are vicious creatures and capable in a conflict, they have extremely strong skin that only powerful weapons are effective against, a Samiad screech is extremely loud and high pitched, they can shriek loud enough to rupture the ear drums of a person standing in close proximity, this can cause the subject to become permanently deaf. Samiads can travel at incomprehensible speed for their size when it has a goal in mind, capable of achieving high speeds that rival cars. Samiads have heightened senses such as smell and hearing. Samiads can be killed, however, they are long lived and cannot die from natural means, Samiads tend to recover quickly from even normally life threatening wounds. Samiads turn to stone upon death.

They do not like being stared at, they will become extremely angry at eye contact, Samiads can become wildly irritated when someone looks at them in the eyes, putting them into a murderous state. They have a fear of small dogs similar to french bulldogs, they are absolutely terrified. Samiads have a natural fear of water. Samiads have a hatred of fizzy drinks as it hurts their taste buds

It is expected that normally Samiads may call you once, twice but never thrice. If a Samiad calls your name once or twice you are usually safe but if it does it three times in a row, with any length of pause, it means the samiad has a particular dislike to you and will likely try to harm you severely.

They very much like cheese and will venture out of the church to find some, this means they may break into homes, usually those with openings the size of a dog or cat. Open windows are the biggest risk, they avoid human contact but will risk confrontation when they are hungry enough. If they cannot aquire cheese on their expedition they might assault the owner of the home purely for amusement. Samiads are also known to consume rats which it finds behind the walls of churches.

The Samiad Codex is hard to come by and it is believed that there are recreations. The Samiad Lexicon however is much easier to come by, you just need to look in the right places. Samiads tend to own copies of the Lexicon, people who wish to acquire one can study the Samiad firstly and determine the location it considers to be it's living space. To take the copy from the Samiad puts the taker at extreme risk and even entering its domain could end in catastrophic consequences. It is considered to be a reckless move to try to take the Samiad's Lexicon.

The Samiads are currently in an armed conflict with the Simpson Family, this conflict is known as The Simpson-Samiad Conflict. A subset of Samiads have been forcefully transported to Matopolus as POWs by the Goofball Simpson which have made a home for themselves in the walls of the expansive realm and have, for the most part, abandoned ties to the world outside of Matopolus and have evolved their own distinct culture.