Opening/Problems at Home (Clara Version)

The Wizard of Oz Parodies Studios Presents….

The Wizard of Oz

For eighty years, this story has given faithful service to the Young in Heart; And Time has been powerless to put its kindly philosophy out of fashion. To those of you who have been faithful to it in return.... And to the Young in Heart, we dedicate this story.

*(We open to four children and a male puppy-like rock-type Pokemon running down a sidewalk in a hurry. The first child is a 12 year old girl with long hip-length dark brown hair, blue eyes, and wearing a big purple hair ribbon similar to Kiki's from "Kiki's Delivery Service," white cropped tanktop with purple words on the front that reads "I Heart Magic" with the heart colored red, a gold key-shaped locket necklace, a purple miniskirt, white socks, and black Mary Jane shoes. She is Clara Stahlbaum. The second child is a 6 year old boy with short brown hair, hazel green eyes, a tiny clear mole on the right dimple of his lips, and wearing a light blue short-sleeved shirt, blue jean shorts, white socks, and white strap-on shoes with green markings. He is Fritz Stahlbaum, Clara’s little brother. The third child is a 15 year old girl with short chin-length curly orange hair, hazel green eyes, and wearing a pink turtleneck tanktop, a white knee-length skirt, white socks, and white slip-on shoes. She is Louise Stahlbaum, Clara and Fritz's older sister. And the last child is a black boy the same age as Clara with short black hair, brown eyes, and wearing a red, yellow, and blue baseball hat, white baseball shirt with red short-sleeves, blue pants, and black knee-high boots with the pants tucked in them. He is Phillip Hoffman, Clara, Fritz, and Louise’s friend and neighbor and also Clara’s boyfriend. And the male dog-like rock-type Pokemon with them has brown and light brown fur, a pale brown fur scruff on his neck, blue eyes, and wearing a blue collar. He is Rockruff, Clara, Louise, and Fritz's pet rock-type puppy Pokemon. As they hurried down the sidewalk, Rockruff and the kids looked back in concern at first and then Clara, Fritz, and Louise stopped to check on Rockruff while Phillip spoke up)*

Phillip: I don’t think she’s coming yet, Fritz, Clara, and Louise.

Louise: Hopefully, Phillip.

*(Clara, Louise, and Fritz petted Rockruff in a comforting way)*

Fritz: Rockruff, did she hurt you?

*(Clara picks Rockruff up protectively)*

Clara: Well, she tried to, didn’t she?

Louise: Well, come on!

Phillip: We’ll go try and tell the others!

*(Fritz and the girls nods and after Clara puts Rockruff down, they hurried along until they reached the Stahlbaum Farm near Topeka, Kansas. They hurried until they found Clara, Fritz, and Louise’s parents working on a broken incubator, counting baby chickens in a hurry. Clara, Fritz, and Louise’s mother is a beautiful 30 year old with long shoulder-length brown hair tied in a ponytail, blue eyes, and wearing a white short-sleeved shirt, a blue skirt, and brown slip on shoes. She is Marie Stahlbaum. And Clara, Fritz, and Louise’s father is a handsome 32 year old man with short brown hair, hazel green eyes, and wearing a green short-sleeved shirt, black pants, and black shoes. He is Benjamin Stahlbaum. As they approached the couple, the children began shouting to get their attention)*

Clara, Fritz, and Louise: Mom! Dad!

Phillip: Mr. and Mrs. Stahlbaum!

Clara: Mom, Dad, listen to what Lady Tremaine did to Rockruff!

Louise: She…!

*(But Marie interrupted them in concern)*

Marie: Girls, not now, we’re trying to count.

Fritz: But we’re trying to tell you…!

Marie: Fritz, please!

Louise: But Lady Tremaine literally hit Rockruff…!

Benjamin: Stop bothering us right now, children! The incubator just broke and we’re likely to lose some chicks!

*(Feeling sorry for the chicks, the kids spoke up)*

Clara, Fritz, Louise, and Phillip: Poor things.

*(Then Clara changed the subject)*

Clara: But listen, Lady Tremaine just hit Rockruff just because he went in her garden to chase her dumb cat, Lucifer, and then bit her for hitting him!

Marie: Clara, not now!

Clara: But that’s not the worse part!

Louise: She says she's gonna call the sheriff and then…!

Marie: Children! Stop it!

*(Clara sighed in annoyance and started singing to Fritz, Louise, and Phillip)*

Clara: **Nobody understands me**

**Nobody even listens**

**Nobody wants to help me**

**Might as well talk to scarecrows**

*(She tried again, which again made Marie and Benjamin a little agitated)*

Clara: But what about Rockruff?

Marie: **Not now**

**We’re having a crisis**

Clara, Fritz, Louise, and Phillip: She’s gonna call the sheriff.

Benjamin: **Not now**

**My wife’s in a state**

Fritz: But you don’t understand.

Benjamin and Marie: **Later, children**

**You’ll just have to wait**

*(Giving up in agitation, Clara, Fritz, Louise, and Phillip began to walk away with Marie and Benjamin lecturing them)*

Clara: **Nobody understands me**

Marie: We can’t afford to lose one chick.

Fritz: **Our little dog’s in danger**

Benjamin: (To Marie) Take these out to the car, Marie.

*(He hands Marie some of the unhatched eggs, which she accepted)*

Louise: **Should’ve been born a chicken**

Clara: **Then they’d payed attention**

*(After the children were gone, Marie and Benjamin felt guilty for snapping at them)*

Marie: Poor little children.

Benjamin: (Trying to be funny) They’ve got to learn to earn their keep.

Marie: (Savagely) Benjamin!

Benjamin: (Apologetically) Just a joke. *(Seriously)* Well, come on. I hope we got them on time.

Marie: (Nods in agreement) Alright, get these into the house.

*(Benjamin noticed the rest of the eggs and nodded, then he picked them up to carry to the house while Marie carried the eggs to the car. At another part of the farm, a group of kids were working on pushing a twister-proof machine they built. The first kid is a 12 year old boy with yellow skin, black stubby hair strands on the top of his head, a black unibrow, and is wearing a red and white striped short-sleeved shirt underneath his green long-sleeved jacket, blue pants, white socks, and black shoes. He is Ed. The second kid is a 12 year old boy with black stringed hair tucked underneath his black sockhat with white lines, a gap in the middle of his top teeth, and is wearing a red orange short-sleeved shirt, purple shorts, red socks, and blue shoes. He is Edd, or Double D by his friends. The third kid is a 12 year old boy with three long black hair strands sticking out, light pink skin, and is wearing a yellow short-sleeved bowling shirt with purple rims, a white collar rim button, and a red horizontal stripe, blue pants with a white fuzzy dice string sticking out of his pocket, white socks, and red shoes. He is Eddy. The fourth kid is a peach-skinned 12 year old boy with three long strands of orange hair similar to Eddy or Double D's, and wearing a lime green long-sleeved shirt, black shorts, a red baseball cap with a black bill, white socks, and black shoes. He is Kevin. The fifth kid is a brown-skinned 12 year old boy with short dark blue hair, and wearing a yellow short-sleeved shirt with a red stripe around the torso, light blue jean pants, and red and cream shoes. He is Rolf. The sixth kid is a fair-skinned 8 year old boy with curly hair the same color as his skin on the top of his head, and wearing a cyan long-sleeved sweater, white pants, a black belt, dark brown shoes with black soles, and a brace ring. He is Jimmy. The seventh kid is a 4 year old girl with short ginger orange neck-length hair, light pink lips, and wearing a pink tanktop, light blue jean pants, and fuchsia red shoes with bumpy dark gray soles. She is Sarah, Ed’s little sister. The eighth kid is a 12 year old girl with short blonde chin-length hair, red lips, and wearing a black short-sleeved shirt underneath a white tanktop, indigo pants with white cuffs, and black shoes with white soles. She is Nazz. And the last kid is an 8 year old boy with brown skin similar to Rolf's, a bald head with many bristles of black hair, and is wearing a white short-sleeved shirt, dark blue jean pants, and black sandals with white straps. He is Jonny 2x4. The wooden board is a beige plank of wood with red eyes and a blue mouth and pupils that have been drawn on with crayon. He is Plank, Jonny's best friend, and they are Stahlbaum’s friends, neighbors, and helpful farmhands)*

Farmhands: **Oh-wee-yah**

**Yo-wah**

**Oh-wee-yah**

**Yo-wah**

*(During the pushing and pulling, they struggled to make sure it didn’t fall)*

Kevin: Help me, guys!

Double D: Some of you are strong than some of us!

Jimmy: Phew. That was scary!

Sarah: Thought the thing will fall on any of us!

Farmhands: **Oh-wee-yah**

**Yo-wah**

*(After putting the machine into position, the farmhands began working on it)*

Eddy: **Come on, you guys**

Ed: **Give it a shove**

Jonny: **Hammer and axe**

**At the ready**

Sarah: **Shoulders and thighs**

Jonny: **Heaven’s above**

Rolf: **Gee, it looks mighty unsteady**

Kevin: Whoa!

*(The machine almost toppled over, but Rolf and Kevin caught it on time and rearranged it. The kids and Rockruff went up to them hopefully that they will listen)*

Clara: **Somebody has to help us**

*(The farmhands ignored her)*

Ed: (Asking Double D) How does this work anyway?

Double D: I’ll show you.

Louise: **Somebody has to listen**

Nazz: Where’s the oil can?

Phillip: **Rockruff’s is awful trouble**

*(Eddy spoke up impatiently to them, finally getting the farmhands’ attention. But the rest of them noticed the kids and Rockruff in concern and became concerned)*

Eddy: Hold on, guys, this is important!

Farmhands: Eddy!

*(They turned to the children)*

Jimmy: What’s wrong, guys?

Clara: **She’s gonna call the sheriff**

*(Realizing what she meant, the farmhands got concerned, even Eddy)*

Ed: Who is, wicked Lady Tremaine?

Clara, Fritz, Louise, and Phillip: **Lady Tremaine is taking Rockruff**

**She says she wants to kill him**

Eddy: What happened this time, her stupid cat, Lucifer, again?

Clara, Fritz, Louise, and Phillip: Uh-huh.

Rolf: Shall we do what we did last time?

*(The farmhands, getting what Rolf asked, laughed along with him)*

Sarah: (Laughing) When we were watering the crops?

Kevin: (Laughing) Turn the hose on Lady Tremaine and her daughters?

Double D: (Laughing) Shall we do that again?

Rolf: (Mockingly) “I’ll get you, those brats, and that little dog, too!”

*(They laughed merrily while Clara, Fritz, Louise, and Phillip got annoyed that they’re not helping them)*

Clara: It’s not funny, you guys!

Fritz: Yeah!

Louise: You playing more tricks would make it worse!

Phillip: That's right!

*(But the farmhands just shrugged it off and began singing, thinking that the kids are overreacting)*

Farmhands: **Relax, she’s not gonna take him**

Phillip: But she will.

Kevin: **Just wants to give you a fright**

Clara: No, she means it!

Farmhands: **You ought to know**

**Her bark is worse than her bite**

*(Rockruff got confused by the pun. Then the farmhands went back to work, leaving Clara, Fritz, Louise, and Phillip disappointed)*

Double D: **Nazz, help me fix this**

Jimmy: **Nazz, you be careful**

Kevin: (Shrugging) **Nazz is Mrs. Fix-It**

Rolf: **Come on, Nazz girl**

Clara: **Nobody even listens**

*(She sighed in defeat)*

Clara: Come on, guys. Looks like we’re not wanted here.

*(They walked up towards a pigpen as the farmhands got concerned while working on the machine)*

Double D: Phillip, girls!

Jonny: Poor kids, I wish we knew how to help them. Even Plank agrees.

Double D: Yes, I know what you mean.

*(Nazz hits the hammer on the machine, and this time, it works, making the farmhands excited)*

Double D: Success!

Eddy: We fixed it!

*(Kevin rolled his eyes in annoyance)*

Kevin: Yeah, yeah.

Ed: Come on, let’s get this hooked up to the barn!

*(They then set the machine up on the barn roof)*

Farmhands: **Oh-wee-yah**

**Yo-wah**

**Oh-wee-yah**

**Yo-wah**

**Oh-wee-yah**

**Yo-wah**

*(After setting up the twister-proof machine on the barn roof, Eddy accidentally almost crushed his finger on the gears)*

Eddy: Ouch! You got my finger!

Kevin: Well, why don't you get your finger out of the way?

*(They then finished setting up and climbed down the barn roof)*

Eddy: (Mumbling) Right on my finger.

*(Clara then balanced herself on the fence of the pigpen with Fritz, Louise, Phillip, and Rockruff watching. Ed then approached them to feed the pigs)*

Ed: Are you gonna let that Tremaine lady scare you? There's nothing to be afraid of. Have a little courage, that's all.

Clara: We're not afraid of her.

Fritz: She may be a little scary, but that doesn't mean we're scared of her.

Ed: Yeah, well, you wanna know what I'd do to her? I'd just walk right up to her and spit in her eye.

*(They looked at Ed with confused awkward looks)*

Ed: (Shrugs) That's what I'd do if I were you.

*(Suddenly, Clara started to lose her balance and she almost fell in with a scream, getting everyone’s attention. Phillip grabbed Clara’s hand, but, with Clara, started to fall in too, but luckily, Ed quickly took action and broke their fall in the mud by landing in there, dirtying Ed. Then he lets Clara and Phillip use him as stepping stones as they are helped out of the pigpen by Louise and the other farmhands)*

Nazz: Are you alright, Clara and Phillip?

Clara and Phillip: (Nods) Yeah.

Louise: Are you hurt?

Phillip: No, thankfully.

Clara: Thanks, Ed.

*(They noticed Ed all muddied up and panting in concern, then they all broke out laughing)*

Fritz: (Laughing) Ed, you were just as scared as we were!

Kevin: (Laughing) What’s the matter, you got scared that the pigs would eat Clara and Phillip?

*(Ed blushed in embarrassment at first, but then laughed along anyway)*

Jonny: (Laughing) Plank says “You’re as muddy as those pigs!”

*(They composed their laughter as Marie approached with chocolate chip cookies on a plate)*

Jimmy: You were as scared as….

*(Marie butted in impatiently)*

Marie: What seems to be going on? There’s work to be done!

Eddy: Sorry, Mrs. Stahlbaum, but Clara was walking along the….

*(Marie interrupted him)*

Marie: I appreciate you guys fixing that contraption, but get back to work!

*(The farmhands nodded)*

Farmhands: Yes, Mrs. Stahlbaum.

Eddy: And one day, we might make history with that twister-proof machine!

Marie: Don’t gloat about it now!

*(Double D and Kevin laughed at Eddy, who just glared)*

Marie: Anyway, I baked some chocolate chip cookies, in case you’re all hungry.

*(The farmhands accepted each cookie, with Eddy suddenly getting happy at this)*

Farmhands: Thanks!

*(Ed tried to explain what happened while wiping his hands clean on a wet towel and accepting a cookie)*

Ed: But you don’t know what just happened.

Marie: And what’s that?

Ed: The reason I’m dirty is because Clara almost fell in the pigpen when….

*(Marie got surprised and snapped)*

Marie: It’s no place for Clara, not even Louise, to be around the pigpen like that! Now go feed those pigs, speaking of them, please!

Ed: Yes, Mrs. Stahlbaum.

*(He goes to work. Clara, Fritz, Louise, and Phillip walked with Marie to the backyard, accepting each a cookie)*

Clara: Mom, listen. Lady Tremaine said she wants Rockruff dead all because…!

*(Marie sighed in annoyance)*

Marie: Now, Clara, quit overreacting! You’re always panicking over nothing!

Clara: But…!

Marie: We’ll talk about this later! Right now, stay out of trouble!

*(She walked away as Clara suddenly became lost in thought, much to Fritz, Louise, Phillip, and Rockruff’s notice)*

Fritz: Clara, you okay?

Clara: (Lost in thought loudly) Someplace where this isn’t any trouble….

*(After finishing their cookies, Clara then spoke to Fritz, Louise, Phillip, and Rockruff)*

Clara: Do you suppose there is such a place, guys?

Phillip: Not that we know of.

Fritz: Yeah.

Louise: There must be, Clara.

Clara: It’s not a place you could get to by a boat or a plane or a train.

Fritz: Or a car?

Clara: I guess. It’s far, far from here. Beyond the moon, beyond the rain….

*(She begins singing while looking at the sky)*

Clara: **When all the world**

**Is a hopeless jumble**

**And the raindrops tumble**

**All around**

**Heaven opens a magic lane**

*(She walked over to a pile of hay)*

Clara: **When all the clouds**

**Darken up the skyway**

**There’s a rainbow highway**

**To be found**

**Leading from my windowpane**

**To a place behind the sun**

**Just a step beyond the rain**

*(She gently leans back at the haystack)*

Clara: **Somewhere over the rainbow**

**Way up high**

**There’s a land that**

**I’ve heard of**

**Once in a lullaby**

*(She then walked over a rake wheel)*

Clara: **Somewhere over the rainbow**

**Skies are blue**

**And the dreams**

**That you’ve dared to dream**

**Really do come true**

*(Fritz, Louise, Phillip, and Rockruff became interested)*

Clara: **Someday I’ll wish**

**Upon a star**

**And wake up**

**Where the clouds**

**Are far behind me**

*(She seated on a chair next to the rake wheel while Fritz, Louise, Phillip, and Rockruff sat next to her)*

Clara: **Where troubles**

**Melt like lemondrops**

**Away above**

**The chimney tops**

**That’s where you’ll find me**

**Somewhere over the rainbow**

**Bluebirds fly**

**Birds fly over the rainbow**

**Why then?**

**Oh, why can’t I?**

*(They noticed a couple of bluebirds happily flying away into the sky and smiled softly)*

Clara: **If happy little bluebirds fly**

**Beyond the rainbow**

**Why, oh, why**

**Can’t I?**

*(She sighed softly and the four kids embraced each other and Rockruff, who nuzzled with them, with gentle smiles on their faces)*

***Coming up: Lady Tremaine arrives to take Rockruff away to be put down. However, after a heated argument with her, Fritz, and Louise’s parents and friends, Clara decides to run away, taking Fritz, Louise, Phillip, and Rockruff, who escaped after the argument, with.***