Season 4 Episode 5: Paul Goes to Heaven

Huh?

In heaven Paul convinces Jesus to kill Miranda and Zorg. The boys use heavens magic to check in on the CCU and see if it was truly destroyed by Mentor.

## Episode Summary

Heavenly vibes! A check in on the old universe and its miraculous manifestations. But don't let the fluffy clouds distract you - this episode is a nail biter that will have you on the edge of your seat!

We start out in HEAVEN where Paul meets God, who sounds and looks a lot like Andy Cohen.

Dean has been taking forever to get Paul’s body to the hospital. Paul got impaled on Alf’s lightsaber in the last episode (just mere minutes ago actually).

He gets Drew acquainted with the afterlife, and even references the Mothman drinking 1000 beers.

Suddenly he gets a call. In heaven they use BlackBerry’s (because the company died get it?)

Jesus shows up and shows him around.

Drew talks about carboloading and how he misses his friends Tom and Nate.

Jesus shows him a heavens-eye view of Omnivale, where they see his impaled nasty body and Miranda and Zorg bickering over it.

They are actually quite rude. Miranda even goes so far as to kick Alf's decapitated head around.

Jesus reveals that Nate most definitely FAF’d. But also it was part of his destiny, so in a way, it was Jesus who spermjacked him!

Then Drew comes up with a heartfelt idea: to kill them both so they can be in heaven with him, because he misses them so much already.

Jesus works some magic to make Dean Winchester get into an argument with Penny, while speeding to the scene of Alf and Paul's duel. There he runs them over and suddenly Tom and Nate are in heaven with Drew and Jesus!

Tom sucks up to Jesus. Nate puts an entire lime in his mouth. Then Jesus uses his magic powers to open a portal to allow them to check in on the CCU with all their creations and sons. In them they see visions of Anderson Cooper, Andy Cohen and FC1400. Phelan also might be around.

Nate wants to kill them all. But Tom thinks of a good idea: Checking in on their sons to get a good old fashioned son update:

**CCU Son Updates**

Nate demands the first vision to be of Hunter Biden’s house.

There, BriFi is playing chesst against a kid! His tweet got a fave from Zuby!

Hunter is watching on from the other side of the room, in his bathrobe and pipe.

DiDi is in a garden, harvesting vegetables and bananas. He’s eating them as he’s picking them, but more importantly, it’s non-brown food! What the heck is going on!?

T aka Taaron is moving extremely fast on his quad bike at a blistering 10 mph, eating solid foods.

They all seem to bee doing so well!

Mentor seems to not yet have gotten to his final destination (Washington, D.C.) to complete his mission.

Next, Jesus shows them a sneak peak of the AMP set with JD and OJ, in a skit about the 2023 Titan Submersible disaster! The crowd of irony poisoned leftists are gobbling it up! Johnny is hosting and plus, he looks like an 80’s heartthrob.

Logic is rapping about Jamie Sweaty.

Drew recreates an infamous Jamie Sweaty poem as a logic rap, wow! Pure hot fire!!

It looks like they made SWEATY and it's had a profound cultural impact.

In the crowd are Levon, Olympia and a bunch of Nants!

But also there, JOC just snuggled up to Charlotte (Nate’s wife!) WTF!? Jesus tries to calm him but Nate shouts and x’s out of all the clouds.

Once things cool off, they continue their scrying.

In Calgary, JPC is thriving. Snackpack is there to help birth the Dinos and somehow solved the problems they were having up there with the cloning machines.

Then, they check in on the freaks at the dealership (CCPMCSB) in SB.

It looks like most of the employees are jerking off and simultaneously having diarrhea! Dad is in control of the dealership.

Jesus eventually loses his cool and flips out at the three hosts arguing. And by now, they've had enough and are *so* over heaven. They pray to Jesus for him to return them to Omnivale and suddenly, Dean is all over them kissing them and pumping Miranda's heart!

He claims it was just mouth-to-mouth.

Drew says he doesn't wanna act like a dickrider and say a prayer to Jesus, so he lets Jesus decide if he wants to send him back or keep him here in Heaven.

As Wiz Khalifa and Charlie Puth song See you Again plays, we are left to wonder if Drew stays in heaven or will return to the OV. Or something else??

And then it goes to the "outro" which is the intro from season three episode Four in which they discuss sending Drew "the Audacity", to be edited like a professional show.

## 20/20/20

Click Here to watch this weeks installment of 20/20/20!

## Guest Starring

Uncredited Guest Star 1…………………. Jesus Christ

Mitch....................Dean Winchester

## OV details

*Potential new section. We are learning more and more about the strange universe that is the Omniverse each week/episode it seems*.

There are **NO** movies in OV. Everyone is real.

Sublime is coming to the Amphitheatre next month.

Freestyle coke machine coming to the OV Ruth's Chris soon!

## Notable quotes

### God

* "Nah bitch. I'm God."
* “Do I look like a mechanic, Motherfucker?!”
* "Tom is a very big bully. But don't worry, one day soon, he will get his."
* “The Melonie Mac fans are going to hell.”
* "There are BlackBerrys in heaven because the company died. Lol."

### Miranda

* “Here’s the thing: I have a little bit of a taste for blood now. Like, you know what…you see Alfs head right here? *\*kicks\** I punted it!”
* "I envision myself killing him [Paul]."
* "I have privy to the females restroom. Women's restroom."

### Jesus, the way and the truth and the life

* “Lights, Camera, Action, Boys!”
* “I’ve been trying to make you guys happy.”
* "I'm a huge *Fun.* fan. It would *rock* if Nate could sing me one of those songs everyday."
* "You will be at peace my son."
* "Don't you understand? YOU GUYS are the reason everything went wrong. You're like a cancer!"

### Tom

* “I know movies.”
* “Well, if you have FC1400 and Phelan, you’re gonna have a good-ass time.”
* “Phelan’s not gonna get killed.”
* “Well of course. They’re havin’ diarrhea *and* they’re jackin’ off.” (about the employees at the CCPMCSB)
* "We're back to AMP! We're back to AMP! Jesus, take us back to AMP."

### Drew aka DrewR15

* “Hey, crack a Catechism!”
* "I'm a good person, like it or not, and we're gonna spend eternity together."
* “I’ve been wanting Jerry O’Connel and Charlotte to hook up for years!”
* "I saw the bread, it's not that great."
* "What about Dogfights. You got any Dogfights goin' on up here?" (in heaven)
* “Show us the Killfrenzy, Jesus.”
* “We used to fuck, hardcore.” (about MrsCanadasHostess)

### Nate

* “Hey Jesus, any chance you could kill those two?”
* “No. NO! Close it, Close the fucking window, close it... Is there a fuckin…is there a close button on this? Where’s the x, I can’t find the x on this, I can’t find the x on these clouds.”
* "You and I ain't truced up in heaven, bud!"
* "Jesus, show us the bank account."
* “There’s one person to blame for all of this, Jesus - it’s not you. Even though everybody on earth thinks it’s you...It’s Drew.”
* “I had no idea Snackpack was so good at cloning!”
* "I feel like, when you're Paul you're awful and pervy, when you're Drew you're awful and pervy..."

## Trivia

Miranda references a scene from the movie Once upon a time in Hollywood, where someone bashes someone elses face in. That's what she was fantasizing about when looking at the Ewok.

Nate references a now infamous scene from the lethal weapon Christmas episode during season 1 episode 09 where they use the reflection on a Christmas tree ornament (that was from a security video on a SD card recovered from a bombed car) to identify a killer.

Andy Cohen was created in Gods image so basically God sounds and looks just like AC.

Tom would drain Drew instantly with his tornado tongue technique.

In heaven Porno is free. Also free refills at all food places.

Jesus said that Logic is NOT allowed to use the N word.

Phelan is stronger than Jesus.