Vale of Tears

One month and eighteen days. That's the amount of time I have to wait to have another shot. Well, originally it was a month. I lasted a week before eighteen days were unceremoniously added. To be fair, I did break the conditions. I tried contacting her eighteen times, all of which added an extra day. I promised myself I would forget this place for the duration of my exile. I couldn't. Every happy moment is sullied by a gnawing feeling of emptiness. There is no more insanity. There is no more madness. I just feel... empty. This was supposed to be my vacation. It's a mess. I didn't last a day before having to interact with the war in some way. Luckily, this wiki exists. I shouldn't have contacted her. If I had remembered about this place I'm sure I wouldn't have. Regardless, what's done is done, and my exile extends to September 6th as opposed to August 19th like it used to. Quite ironic, I think. September 6th was the day my first exile ended. The day Axolotl Axolotl, this account, was created in a last-ditched attempt to return to some placw I didn't know. Funny, I can draw so many comparisons to my first exile. Luckily, my first exile ended and I became a contributing member, a good one. I would go on to have an entire year without so much as a breakdown. If I did it then, surely I can do it again. I'm grateful I know when this exile ends, and doubly so that it ends on such a meaningful day. Despite my actions back then I proceeded to befriend each and every one of the venkons and make up tenfold for my wrongdoing. Some of you told me I did nothing. That is untrue. Perhaps it helps to see me as someone who contributed nothing at all. It's easier to hate someone that's lazy, after all. But I was there for a whole lot. And I've made my own observations that I continue to keep from everyone. So far I've been able to predict certain events on those alone. This isn't some magic, just logic. I'm good at noticing patterns. Ironic, then, that this pattern of me begging to come back and becoming an asshole continues to vex me. Perhaps this is some sort of curse. Or perhaps I'm just raving mad. I'm on vacation now, but I couldn't just leave the war behind. Funnily enough, I was on vacation in 2016 too. In fact, I'm at the very place I went on vacation back then. The time lines up perfectly too. This coincidences with my stay at a beachside cabin shortly before the beginning of my first exile. Yet another comparison I can draw. I know many of you read this. I've been told so. I've prepared a few things I want to say. And, by the way, as this technically isn't a message wall, no extra days are added ;)

To Nicole: I've already said everything I wanna say to you. It's on your smiledog page. Read it, if you want. (No, not really, but this is what I said back then and it feels cool)

To Shy: Yes, I'm messaging you. I realize I've been somewhat of a pest these past few months. I never do listen. Ironic that this is the very thing I told you back when I left my first message during my first exile.

To WC: Hey there, so I kinda don't like you very much, but regardless, your points were clear and what you told me was true. I'm a jackass, I admit it.

To everyone else: I will return someday. Of that I'm sure. The loop will call me back eventually. I've been a huge dick to all of you, and for that I'm sorry. But I look forward to cooperating with you all in the future. If I changed from a lunatic to a good person once, surely I can do it again.

Well, off I go, back to exile. I'll most likely use this wiki more in the future. Oh, and remember, let he who has not sinned cast the first stone. I'm quite tired of the taunting and mockery I receive from people who send me friend requests just to laugh at me. I get enough of that at school.

Pax tibi,

-BlackSmithy