Interview with Sador

(The tape starts off with a man named Alex Stewer introducing himself, and giving the date.)

Alex:..I am accompanied by a curious individual, Sador. He is a rare case of a sentient "Tharul worm,' a worm that enters and extremely mutates its hosts. Sador, should we start off with you telling us about your sentience?

Sador: I suppose such would be of the audience's interest.

Alex: Yes. Please take us all the way back, the furthest you remember.

Sador: I will. My memories as a worm are very limited. I remember being on a.. Tropical forest, hunting rodents with my brothers and sisters. We were feasting on the days catch, a big, juicy rat. Now, of course, a rat wouldn't be worth the effort to be made into a host, so it's best used as sustenance.

Alex: And, I mean, no one would *want to be a rat, anyway.*

Sador: Rodents don't bother me, nor do any organism, really.

Alex: Yes, I imagine it's hard to be disturbed by anything, considering your existence is literally body horror.

Sador: *Haha!* That is a funny way to put it. I've yet to visit a cinema, i'm still moving in to my new apartment.

Alex: Is it a shitty one? No offence, but I wouldn't imagine a high-class hotel with low enough standards to host, no pun intended, a tharul worm.

Sador: My apartment is owned by the government, I'm allowed to live there until I obtain a job or career. Wan't i talking about my past?

Alex: right. We can talk about living conditions later. yeah, go on.

Sador: The next thing I recall is being thawed from ice-

Alex: So you went from being in a jungle to being iced?

Sador: Yes, believe me, I've been pondering such events myself. I was claimed by a small independent mining vessel, one which i believe was supposed to investigate the theory of Niadite in glaciers. They found me, though.

Alex: they damn did.

Sador: damn right. The captain was alone and had me inside a container on his shelf. I'm not sure to call it fate, but the latch loosened, and I was free. My instincts kicked in, driving me into stealthily plunge myslef into his leg and make my way to his brain.

Alex: Why not stay in his leg and be a living leg lump or something.

Sador: Tharul worms have maximum efficiency when in the brain. Yes, I could've worked my magic from his leg, although at the time I didn't see any point in that.

Alex: Ok. As you were saying.

Sador: By some miracle, the old man had one of those outdated devices you would have surgically implanted on your brain to prevent Alzheimer and keep your mind fresh, I'm sure you've heard of the invention and how it died when people found it could combust.

Alex: trust me, you have no idea what I've seen.

Sador: The machine, broadcasting a constant stream of information into me, seemed to endow me with 'intellect.' In my new body, I stood there, a shell of the previous owner. Have I taken a life, or replaced it? i'm not so sure as to where the man's consciousness is now. But, I suppose this could be for the better.

Alex: It depends, was the old man a piece of shit?

Sador: He was shitty, from what I recall.

Alex: Well, I'm good then.

Sador: Thank you, Alex. I am fine with people antagonizing me, for I did technically steal that man's life. But I do believe I am destined for good. I'll have to take things one step at a time.

Alex: I believe in you, man. wait, didn't you have a thing with the Asterax?

Sador: indeed. The ship was very soon raided by Asterax, and the small vessel had to offensive capabilities. The asterax seemed to like me though, and took me to their secret base. I worked many jobs for them: Breeding, taxes, strategist, or general info. Until the Egonians found them and me, capturing me, and I eventually got released two months later as an official citizen.

Alex That's a great story. So the birds used you to breed? with what?

Sador: Myself. Tharul worms are asexual, my primary job was to lay eggs. I never met any of my children, by I have heard rumors that the ones which survived are as intelligent as i am.

Alex: That's really interesting! Any clue as to where they are?

Sador: As the Egonians raided, all the eggs were jettisoned into space, hoping to crash onto a planet eventually. I have no doubt my children may find other life. I wish to meet one of them. Talk to them, feel them, love them, perhaps, as a parent would. I imagine they have many questions as to where they came from.

Alex: I guess we'll know when there's a new Tharul worm outbreak. Who knows, maybe instead of blasting it immediately, the Egonians will let you talk to it first.

Sador: I have actually brought up that idea. Tharul worms are a social species, being able to feel each others presences from miles away, I believe I could successfully negotiate and defuse the situation if given the chance.

Alex: A then your new friend will shrink down and become a citizen too?

Sador: That wishful thinking would be naive. I would see if i can introduce the same method of sentience which worked on me, but another plan would be to relocate my brethren to a controlled artificial environment where they could live peacefully and be observed.

Alex: hear that, Egonians? That's a pretty cool idea. Say, have you ever done thst thing where you expand and, *well, y'know, do what ever it is that tharul worms do*

Sador: The excessive mutating? I do try my best to suppress my primal urge to just - *let loose and grow everywhere*. but doing so would be rude, and I don' think I could live with myself if i purposefully took another life. I try my best to keep this humanoid shape, albeit I look like a morbidly obese, dippy man.

Alex: I think you look great, bud.

Sador: I appreciate it, thank you. Being like this feels like constantly wearing a tight suit, one with low circulation. I think i'm getting used to it, though in my spare time I unwind, and get to expand a little throughout my room.

Alex: I wouldn't mind if you unwound right here. I mean, I smoked a little bit of weed before arriving here. I like to think of this as a casual chat, y'know?

Sador: You're very nonchalant, I do like it.

(Sador leans back in his seat, his body drooping significantly and covering the chair & 5ft radius.

Sador: Aaaaaaaahh. That is much better. Would you like to see a trick?

Alex: (putting feet up on table) Sure, why not?

Sador: (Morphs his hand to look just like Alex's face) tadaa!

Alex: Holy shit, that's pretty cool. What else can you do?

Sador: What can't I do? grow a hundred arms, make my head into a dog, etc.

Alex: Hey, have you ever though about being a surgeon I mean, like, okay, hear me out. A man is rushed into the Er. The nurse is all like: "Oh no, Mr. Sador! This man need a heart transplant right now or he's gonna die!" and then you're like: "I got this," And you easily just plunge your hand into his chest, use your tharul worm powers to grow him a new heart inside of him, and retract your hand out! You could do anything!

Sador: ...Y'know, that's a really good idea.

Alex: Right?

Sador: I was always interesting in taking up a career in philosophy, but that'll definitely be my plan B.

Alex: Another thought. i'm an immortal man, and you're a tharul worm. If you got into my body, would you have, like, the best host ever? my body infinitely regenerates, and you could reach infinite mass and shit.

Sador: I don't really like the thought of that. I don't wish to do any ill-will to anyone, and being immortal honestly isn't all that appealing to me.

Alex: It has its ups and downs. I mean, my biggest fear is surviving up to the point where the universe eventually explodes and gets really hot and is just gas-filled empty space again. It' be eons before i'd talk to anyone again, not to mention the intense pain.

Sador: My biggest fear is losing my identity. With my intelligence I believe that I am only now truly "alive." I think that to be alive is to have memories, good memories. I don;t think the ones I shared earlier could've even been real, as I couldn't been really *living* until then. My experiences and people I've met so far has brought me a wide array of emotions, ones that I've come to understand as a part of who we are, and being able to realize them is part of being alive. Without my intellect, I am nothing, a monster, dead. I believe I can retain my intellect in my worm form, so i should be safe.

Alex: Wow... Yeah. Um, i think i'll change the subject to a more, light-hearted one... Do you have balls?

Sador: Balls?

Alex: Yeah. Y'know, like a penis and the testicles.

Sador: I believe I have all the vital humans organs, but I don't recognize the penis.. No, not really.

Alex: Wait, so you're saying that you deemed it unimportant and just got rid of it? That hilarious! Haha!

Sador: yes, I suppose so, ha!