The Hunted

Greetings once more, Kiddies.  Your Ol' FIEND, CREEPS, is just making a little sandwich, with a little TOMA-TOE, some A-SCARE-RICAN CHEESE, KILL PICKLES and MANSLAYS Hee-Hee-Hee-Hee-Hee!  This tale consists of a trip in a TROPICAL SCARE-ADISE, entitled...

It was back in June, 1909, that a man walked along a beach down in Jamaica one night.  He came to a juice-bar and sat down.  "Good evening, sir, my name is Andrew Simon how do you do?" an older man said to the man, introducing himself.  "Good evening Mr. Simon, I am Edward Yates, nice to meet you" he replied and they shook hands.  "Thank you sir.  Where are you from, Mr. Yates?" Andrew Simon asked.  "North America sir.  How about yourself?" Edward answered then asked him.  "North America too.  Say, would you be interested in joining me on a hunting trip tomorrow?" Andrew Simon replied, inquiring.  "Why, yes sir.  Thank you Mr. Simon" Edward Yates said, smiling.

The following morning, Edward Yates and Andrew Simon journeyed on foot into the Jamaican jungles, together.  "Boy, it does get mighty hot down here on this island, do you agree Mr. Yates?" Andrew Simon asked him.  "Why, yes it sure does Mr. Simon.  Um, what are we hunting for?" he agreed and wondered.  "Oh, you shall see sir!" Andrew replied.  Thirteen miles later, were deep, into the tropical jungle and as they stopped by a palm tree, Edward noticed Andrew raise his shotgun to him.  Mr. Yates screamed, "WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS MR. SIMON SIR???" at Andrew.  "There are no bullets in my shotgun here sir.  I only brought it along to trick you" he answered.  Suddenly, Mr. Simon transformed into a beast with green fur.  The creature looked like a bigfoot-like monster, with small white-pupils in a pair of black-eyes.  The thing dropped its shotgun on the ground.  Mr. Yates screamed and screamed in terror, shooting at the large thing.  He found that his shotgun wasn't loaded.  "Ha, I gave you an unloaded shotgun!" the creature growled, deeply, biting Edward Yates in his arm.  Its massive-fangs pierced his flesh, causing him to scream and pull away.  Edward struck the beast in its skull with the shotgun he held and took off, racing through the jungle.  He made it to a large tropical plant and ducked on the other side of it.  Crouching, Mr. Yates heard parrots cawing nearby.  He silently took off and heard the growls of the thing somewhere in the distance.  Mr. Yates stopped, panting and sweating, catching sight of a coconut that had broke open.  He grabbed it, drinking the coconut milk out of it.  As he did, he was struck in his neck, by the thing's long and curvy claws.

Mr. Yates pitched forward, falling and turned, peering up, at the monster.  As its small pupils of white and black eyes peered down at him, it roared again.  Mr. Edward Yates yanked a pocket-knife from his pocket and drove it into the beast's furry-throat, causing greenish slime to spurt out.  The monster growlecd in pain, falling on top of Mr. Yates, dead.  He screamed, pushing the body of the monster off of himself, and pulled the knife out of its furry-neck.  The blade was covered in slime.  Mr. Edward Yates ran off, finding a shortcut out of the jungle, returning to the beach.

Ah, wasn't that a bit of JUNGLE MADNESS, BOILS AND GHOULS?  Mr. Edward Yates sure had quite a SHARP IDEA with his pocket-knife and gave Mr. Andrew Simon the POINT with it ha-ha.  AT BEAST, Andrew had a ROARING GOOD TIME heh-heh-heh.