Rowan Inspector-Matthews

> “*fucking put a cigarette out on my dick*”
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> ―FancySheep, More Shit People Say In TF2
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**Rowan Inspector-Matthews** is the son of Pickle Inspector and Keith "Two-Bit" Matthews.

An unkempt, sickly-looking specimen of a man who, paradoxically, appears to be a medical genius. A nervous (albeit well-spoken) soul who glued himself to the Mistakes out of fear of either them or...something else. He does not seem too excited about later learning that his new companions are in the business of unearthing the deep secrets of those who'd rather leave them buried.

## Backstory

Rowan cares nothing for the circumstances of his conception and birth, nor would either of his parents be able to tell him reliably if he asked. All parties are, however, reasonably certain that Rowan was not born biologically, at least not in a way that makes sense outside the pages of Problem Sleuth.

He grew up in Tulsa, in one of the less-than-wealthy neighborhoods, and his school life was...well, it was certainly relevant to his current state of being. After a particularly relevant event, he dropped out and began self-teaching from stolen textbooks, leading to the discovery of his uncanny medical talent. This discovery was not directly responsible for the next relevant event, but it certainly helped it come to pass.

He and his father got into an argument that lead to him leaving home at age eighteen, which lead to him later encountering the Mistakes.

That's his entire backstory. No, he doesn't know anything about any Tulsa Mutilator.

## Personality

Be it a result of his obvious nerves or one of simple introversion, Rowan does not especially like having to interact with other people. When he does, he's polite in an obviously manufactured way, speaking in a manner that suggests he treats everyday interaction as a method of negotiation. He has very little patience for the bizarre, and seems to consider strange happenings to be some form of irritating joke played on him by reality. He has a sense of humor, albeit a dry one. He is secretive, and while it is rare for him to outright lie, most of what he reveals about his past is a half-truth.

## Relationships

### **Keith**

Rowan has never once thought of his father as "Father" or "Dad" or, really, as anything but his given name. This is particularly telling of their relationship--neither of them really likes to acknowledge the other as family. It seems as though they've become similar people, though: dirt-poor, depressed alcoholics with the permanent weight of a few dead boys on their shoulders.

### **The Mistakes**

Rowan has no idea what to make of these people, but he doesn't exactly trust their judgement. After all, none of them seem to believe he's disgusting or dangerous. A few even *like* him, or seem to. Don't they know he doesn't deserve it? Or are they toying with him? He isn't sure which option he wants to be true.

#### **Kainashi Namine**

Rowan doesn't like Kai. He's well aware that Kai doesn't like him. Neither fact bothers him in the slightest. Well, that's not quite true. Honestly, he has a strange sort of respect for Kai. After all, out of all these people who outwardly seem to trust or like Rowan, Kai is the only one who has the good sense to openly hate him specifically. That's almost likable.

#### **Isaac Fischer**

Of the approximately everyone Rowan doesn't trust, he trusts Isaac the least. Which is a shame, because Isaac is honestly the kind of person he wished he'd had as a friend when he was younger. But someone he actually would want to be friends with, trying in earnest to be his friend? It has to be a ruse.

#### **Nanatsuki-no-Hanabira**

Rowan would be lying if he said he didn't find Nan at least a little attractive. Of course, he would say that anyway. [wip]

## Fetter

Rowan's main fetter is the second-stage **Artemisia, The Grotesque**.

He also has an alternate universe third-stage, **Artemisia, The ???**.