Wallace Bryton

* Wallace
* In his office
* Kidnapped by Howard
* Wallacerus

## Characteristics

### Alias

Wally (by Ally Leon and his mother)Facial hair-afficionado (by the border agent)
Mr. Mustache (by the 2 clerks / McKenzie and Collette)
Mr. Bryton (by Howard Howe)
Mr. Tusk (by Howard Howe)
Dear boy (by Howard Howe)
Boy (by Howard Howe)
Wallace-rus (by script)

## Personal status

### Friends

Teddy Craft (former best friend)Howard Howe (former acquaintance)

## Other

### Goal

Interviewing Howard Howe for his podcast (failed)

### Affiliation

Tusk (first appearance)Yoga Hosers (mentioned)
Tusk$ (last appearance)

### Portrayed by

Justin Long

  WARNING! This page contains spoilers, language, sexual references, violence, death, descriptions of disturbing events, and images that may be disturbing. Continue at your own caution!  {{{content}}}

 —Wallace's most popular line

***Wallace Bryton*** is the main protagonist of the 2014 body-horror / psychological thriller / dark comedy film *Tusk*. Wallace is expected to be the antagonist of ***Tusk's*** upcoming sequel, ***Tusk$***.

## Appearance

Wallace has a medium skin tone, black / brown, straight, medium length hair, a predominant and bushy mustache, bushy eyebrows, and brown eyes. His hair is often down, but is seen combed to the side when he first gets to Canada and meets Howard. His lips are also a noticeable watermelon pink tone.

At the beginning of the film with Teddy (and a later flashback of the same day), Wallace is seen wearing a dark blue button-up shirt with white buttons, and blue jeans.

During most of the beginning of the film, Wallace wears a black leather jacket, a red-violet button-up shirt with small purple patterns and brown buttons on it, black jeans, and brown dress shoes. He is also sometimes seen with a black leather handbag during these scenes.

In the flashbacks with Ally, Wallace is shown to have armpit hair and a shaved body. He is also seen wearing black sweatpants.

After Wallace passes out from Howard's tea, he is seen wearing a white baggy shirt with a noticeable stitch line on the upper back of it, a beige knitted coat with black buttons, and a patchwork blanket over his waist.

## Personality

Wallace is very arrogant, selfish, apathetic, and dense. He often doesn't take things or other's feelings seriously, and puts his materialistic wants first, before anyone else's needs. This unpleasant side of him is showcased best with his girlfriend, Ally, where he ignores her emotional needs. He often makes offensive or crude jokes, such as making fun of Ally's accent, mocking Canadians by saying "aboot" and assuming they're all nice, making jokes about nazis, and often making references to genitalia or sexual activities openly to others. Despite Wallace admitting that he does awful things, he tries making excuses for himself to normalize what he does and to not feel bad about it.

Wallace is shown to be very extroverted, often seeking adventure or dopamine, which he does by finding eccentric people to interview for his podcast and by sleeping with many people. He often has time focusing on things, which causes him to change subject a lot. He is hyper, often talking quickly in a comedic fashion and being dramatic about his emotions and tone of voice.

However, after Wallace is kidnapped by Howard and retrieves his phone, his calls of desperation to Ally and Teddy are very sincere. He thinks these are his last moments alive, and apologizes to Ally about everything he's done. During this time in the film, Wallace is shown to have more will to fight for his life and show more humanity.

Soon after Wallace is successfully surgically transformed into a walrus, Wallace gives up his will to live, possibly showing that Wallace is not all that strong-willed of a person. In the end of the film, Wallace is shown to still have his humanity in him, and regrets his past, as shown through his tears and cries towards Ally.

### Wallace's past personality

Ally states many times that Wallace was a much more loving, kind, and selfless man in the past. However, Wallace denies this by claiming that his past self was geeky, unfunny, a cry baby, made Stars Wars puns, and didn't know how to make proper money.

## Biography

Wallace was born in New Jersey, and moved to Los Angeles, California, some time later in his life. He used to make Star Wars puns and would play clubs every night to get money. When Wallace and her first had sex together, he told her that he loved her *(something Ally notes that he doesn't do anymore)*. Likely later on down the line, Wallace and Teddy would form the Not-See Podcast. In 2012 *(a year before 2013, the year the film takes place in)*, the podcast made $100k from ads alone, even before they started selling t-shirts and doing live shows.

## Relationships

### Ally Leon

Wallace mistreats Ally, and often openly cheats on her. He brushes aside her emotional needs and her attempts to change Wallace. He often changes the subject, or tries to convince Ally that what he does isn't awful, and is even shown to victim blame her. However, once Wallace is kidnapped and calls Ally, he is shown to be sincere, and apologizes to her for everything he has done. At the end of the film, Wallace is shown be regretful for his actions towards Ally yet again - though, he is unable to verbally state this, but he conveys it with his mournful cries.

### Teddy Craft

Wallace and Teddy are best friends and co-hosts of their podcast. They often agree with each other, joke around, and talk openly to each other about their problems or thoughts. Though, Teddy is shown to openly disagree with Wallace's treatment of Ally, and often tries to convince Wallace of treating her better. Wallace is also conflicted about Teddy and Ally being together, often questioning Teddy when the topic of Ally comes up, and obviously being a little jealous of him being around Ally.

### Howard Howe

When Wallace and Howard first meet, they're very open and friendly to each other. The two talk about their lives and themselves, and make many banter-y jokes towards each other and about their life experiences. However, Howard kidnaps Wallace, and Wallace's once friendly demeanor is shattered with hatred and fear - with Howard being violent and uncaring towards Wallace. During this time, Wallace calls Howard many insults and screams at him in anger. Eventually, once Wallace is surgically turned into a walrus, Howard is moderately loving and more open towards Wallace-rus now, though he has a very abusive teaching style *(ex. letting him almost drown, purposely putting his head under the water for an extended amount of time, etc.)*. Wallace-rus eventually kills Howard in a blind rage, though Howard, at first, is fearful, is satisfied with Wallace-rus letting out his inner "animal".

### Guy LaPointe

The one and only time Wallace and Guy meet, Guy attempts to shoot Wallace-rus with his shotgun.

### Family (general)

Though it is not touched on much, it is clear Wallace has a strained relationship with his mother and grandmother. He describes his grandmother as "the worst", and states that she was a chain smoker. He portrays his mother as annoying and somewhat worrisome, and states that she is also "the worst". It is clear that there is a subtext of him blaming his own family, even though most of them are probably just worried for his wellbeing and toxic lifestyle choices.

### Miscellaneous

Wallace and the two clerks banter a lot, with the clerks being confused and annoyed with Wallace's weird social interactions. The two clerks make fun of Wallace for his mustache, idiotic attitude, and cultural unawareness. Wallace walks away annoyed at them.

Wallace and the border agent get along decently, however, it is clear that the border agent is using his witty-ness to make Wallace look dumb and confused. Though, Wallace doesn't understand this, and plays along with the border agent's jokes. The border agent also corrects Wallace on his stereotypes of Canadians, and tells Wallace how Canadians are superior to Americans.

Though the two don't meet in person, Wallace is shown to make fun of and take advantage of the Kill-Bill Kid's misfortune. Once Wallace finds out that he unfortunately committed suicide, Wallace calls him a "selfish little peg-leg piece of shit".

## Fandom reception

People outside of the fandom reasonably did not like Wallace as a character due to his behavior. However, within the fandom, Wallace is beloved, with him being the focus of most pieces of fanart, edits, and more. Some people within the fandom also think Wallace is cute, and there are quite a few pieces of Tusk fanart and edits that make him out to be attractive, or similar to a "bad boy". This love for Wallace is mostly seen on Tumblr and Tiktok communities.

Though there aren't too many popular headcanons for Tusk yet (due to Tusk's fandom being small), a fairly common headcanon surrounding Wallace is him being a transgender man. This headcanon was more popularized in the Tusk fandom by a queer look on the film by Tiktok user @**INSERTLATERRRIDKKKKUHKSKFHHIWIGWIGWIG** , who shared the many similarities between Tusk and the experiences of transphobia that transgender people face, seeing Wallace as a transgender person experiencing severe societal pressures from Howard, who they viewed as a general stand-in for transphobic and abusive healthcare providers. Though this is not canon, it is an interesting view on the film.

## Gallery

### In his office

FlashbackWallace questioning TeddyFlashback
### At the airport

Wallace going for a high-fiveBorder agent denying Wallace's high-fiveWallace mimicking Adolf Hitler
### Arriving at Kill-Bill Kid's funeral

Wallace's carWallace denying Ally's phone callChest out like a superhero
### In the bar + the restroom

Wallace telling Teddy about the Kill Bill Kid's suicideEnding the callTaking a swig of his beerUsing the bar's restroomReading Howard's letter

### Tea with Howard

Wallace and Howard meetingWallace and Howard shaking hands”Can I use your bathroom?”Taking a wicked pissSeeing Howard’s creepy doll decorationTrying to ignore itTurning the doll aroundRelieved that the doll isn’t towards himWallace laughing at Howard’s ignorance”Hell is your children.”Playing Howard’s piano”Your hand bill intrigued me!”"So its like, uh-... Like a walrus spine?"Silly WallaceWallace holding Howard's walrus baculumWallace getting tiredWallace’s vision getting blurryWallace passed out
### Flashback with Ally

Wallace trying to "comfort" AllyUmFlashback
### Amputated leg

Wallace seeing his amputated legHoward trying not to laugh at Wallace
### Dinner + calling for help

Wallace screaming for helpWallace waking up after supperCalling Ally and Teddy for helpLooking around paranoidHoward knocking Wallace to the groundWallace passing out

### Learning to walrus

The walrus revealWallacerus is forced into the waterWallacerus about to go under the water completelyWallacerus sees the failed swimmerWallacerus eats his fishWallacerus rolls his eyesHe rolls his eyes againHead retreating like a turtleWater on the camera lens

### Letting his animal out

Looking at Howard getting out of his suit in shockWalrus fight!Wallacerus gets on top of HowardWallacerus kills HowardSeeing Ally and Teddy
### A walrus's end

Wallacerus’s enclosureWallacerus eats the fish Ally gave himA sad ending
### Miscellaneous

Wallace's rented car dumped in a pondWallace's picture on Teddy's tablet
## Quotes

"I'm gonna... I'm gonna fucking piss my pants!”

*—Wallace watching the ‘Kill-Bill Kid’ video (and his first line in the film)*

"Hey, if you want to watch this video, please go to our website, 'NotSeeParty.com,' N-O-T S-E-E... Not 'nazi' with a 'z,' that would be like a cross-dressing Adolf Eichmann-Liza Minnelli impersonator."

"I'm gonna talk to this kid about everything. I wanna know- I wanna know what he masturbates to, I wanna know if he kept the leg?! Did he keep the leg?!"

"Feeling bad?! The kid's got tons of hits, 'cause he's famous! Right? I mean- what more do you want? He has more hits than I do. I'm kinda, in a weird way, jealous. I don't need both legs, what am I? I'm not running marathons!"

"Hey, fucker! You ready for this? Fuckin' Kill-Bill Kid fucking killed himself! Sir! With his own fucking sword! Can you believe this shit? I am not fucking kidding you. Gonna hold out for 2 more days, selfish, little peg-leg piece of shit."

*—Wallace telling Teddy about the Kill-Bill Kid's suicide shortly after finding out*

"No, its- its not the room I'm interested in, as much as you, Mr. Howe. Yeah- tonight would be- that'd be amazing, sir! Yes, thank you. Alright, where am I going? ... Bifrost, sounds erotic! Heh heh heh."

*—Wallace talking to Howard over the phone in the convenience store*

"Uh, how far is Bifrost from here? ... Yeah, the kids here at the convenience store tell me that it's aboot two hours away."

—*Wallace talking to Howard over the phone in the convenience store*

"That was great! I was holding it in for half the ride... It's a little embarrassing, but, um... I was kinda spooked to get out of the car in the middle of nowhere."

"Oh, my grandma- my grandma used to say, she'd say 'Hell is your children.' Chain smoker, 'Hell is your children.' She was the worst"

—*Wallace describing his grandmother*

"I'm not laughing at you. You just... You just reminded me of my mom. "Wally, what're you doing?" Ugh, she's the worst. You're fantastic!"

—*Wallace describing his mother*

"I just came in my pants! That's my McConaughey, prematurely ejaculating."

—*Wallace describing his podcast to Howard via. flashback*

"This is gonna sound really weird, but I've never had tea like this, it's blowing my mind! I feel like I've never had tea in my life! Eh- I'm like popping my cherry! I'm not even a tea person!"

"The audience likes it, real and raunchy, so I try to keep it real and raunchy - and real raunchy!"

"Where'd you buy something like this? A head shop? Ba-dum-bum."

"What... What'd you-... What'd you-... What'd you-..."

—*Wallace's last words to Howard before passing out*

"Mm... Howard, I can't feel my legs."

"Oh my god! Oh my god! Holy shit! I-I-I- theres no leg there! ... My leg is off!!! Oh my god!"

—*Wallace seeing his amputated leg*

"Rounds?! What rounds?! We're in the middle of nowhere!"

"I don't wanna hear your fucking stories!"

"LET ME OUT OF THIS CHAIR, YOU FUCKING PSYCHO! LET ME OUT! LET ME OUT, YOU OLD FUCKING NUTBAG! ... HELP! SOMEBODY HELLLPPP!!!"

—*Wallace realizing Howard's true nature*

"Ally, Ally, you gotta help me. I swear to God I'm not joking, okay? I was abducted. I'm in Manitoba. This guy wants to turn me into an animal or something! He's fucking nuts! You gotta come, please, please, please, please, please! I don't know where he is, but I'm somewhere in his weird fucking house. I'm like- I'm like 2 hours from Winnipeg. I'm so fucking scared. I'm so scared I'm not going to see you again. I'm sorry I'm such an asshole. I'm so sorry... I've got 1 leg, Ally... Okay? Please... Okay, just get here, okay? Call the cops. Ally, Ally, I don't wanna die in Canada... I don't wanna die at all... Oh, fuck... Fuck..."

—*Wallace's voice call to Ally*

"Teddy, it's me! I swear to God this isn't a fucking joke! I'm being held captive! I'm not kidding. I'm being held captive by some crazy motherfucker! He cut off my fucking leg. Listen to me, you gotta call the cops. I'm like- I'm like 2 hours north of Winnipeg... I'm somewhere- I'm somewhere in like- bumfuck Manitoba! This guy's name is Howard Howe, okay? It's Howard Howe. You gotta call the cops. Call the cops. I don't know exactly where, but I'm scared shitless, man. He wants to turn me into like, like a-..."

—*Wallace's voice call to Teddy (and his last line as a human)*

"You guys got pads in Canada? Anything for me to write on- you guys just write in the air? #Thanks."

—*Wallace in the convenience store flashback*

"So? I don't cry! I mean, big deal. I'm also a lot older, remember? Crying's kinda for babies."

—*Wallace in the ending flashback with Ally (and his last in-film line)*

### Dialogue pieces;

* **Border Agent:** "When you're visiting the great, white north of Canada, you' got your Cana-does, and you' got your Cana-don'ts. Top-shelf, right there, #1. Don't go telling a Canadian you don't follow hockey!
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Ah-ho-ho, of course, I should've known. Makes 'em sad, right?"
* **Border Agent:** "A Canadian doesn't get sad. Sadness was made by the USA."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Oh, come on, what does that mean?
* **Border Agent:** "Take off, its true! Right there on our flag, its right there when you look at it, and you see past that sacred maple leaf. You know what you see?"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "A wall."
* **Border Agent:** "You see that in America, you may be red, white, and blue, but in Canada, you're red, white, but never blue, eh? Ever.
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Gotcha. Thats actually- you know, I've never thought of it that way before. I was thinking of Canadians as just 'nice.'"
* **Border Agent:** "Well, right there is another Cana-don't. We're not nice, we're optimistic, theres a difference."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Right."
* **Border Agent:** "And we're tolerant."
* ***Wallace Bryton:*** "Mhm..."
* **Border Agent:** "And we're hung like moose."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Oh!"

* **Wallace Bryton:** "Mr. Howe?"
* **Howard Howe:** "Howard."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Mr. Howard?"
* **Howard Howe:** "It's always a French bedroom farce when people get entangled with my name for the first time. Howard Howe. And while 'Mr. Howe' is absolutely appropriate, I prefer the intimacy of Howard."

* **Howard Howe:** "You know, I must say, your phone call intrigued me."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Well, I'm telling you, your handbill intrigued me!"

* **Howard Howe:** "Did I understand you correctly on the phone when you said you weren't looking for a living arrangement?"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Mm-hm. No, I live in Los Angeles."
* **Howard Howe:** "Ohhh."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Yeah."
* **Howard Howe:** "The City of Angels."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Well, I've never seen any myself. More the opposite, really."
* **Howard Howe:** "My grandma Mimsy used to tell us 'One needn't go very far to find Hell in a hand basket.'"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "I like that, I like Mimsy. Oh, my grandma- my grandma used to say, she'd say 'Hell is your children.' Chain smoker, 'Hell is your children.' She was the worst"

* **Wallace Bryton:** "You talked about sharing stories. Well, I'm a story-teller by trade."
* **Howard Howe:** "You're a writer?"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "I'm a podcaster."
* **Howard Howe:** "Good Lord, what on earth is that?"

* **Wallace Bryton:** "'Oosik'... Woah, so its like, uh-... Like a walrus spine?"
* **Howard Howe:** "No, its more like a walrus cock."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Shut up."
* **Howard Howe:** "Oh, I'm a dirty boy, aren't I?..."

* **Howard Howe:** "I didn't purchase this oosik. One could almost say this oosik purchased me."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "'The wand chooses the wizard.'"
* **Howard Howe:** "What a delightful expression. I shall add that to my collection of things to say so as to distract from my woeful stupidity and boring demeanor."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "I've met plenty of stupid, Mr. Howe..."
* **Howard Howe:** "Howard."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "You're anything but stupid, and like the polar opposite of boring."

* **Wallace Bryton:** "A walrus? No fucking way, pardon my French! A walrus saved your life?"
* **Howard Howe:** "A walrus made my life, Mr. Bryton. Made it worth living again.

* **Howard Howe:** "The walrus is far more evolved than any man I've ever known. Present company included."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Thank you!"
* **Howard Howe:** "You're welcome."

* **Wallace Bryton:** "Mr. Tusk? That's cu-... Cute..."
* **Howard Howe:** "Cute is for Chinese babies, Mr. Bryton. But my walrus companion was beautiful. I have never known such a fulfilling friendship with anyone, human or otherwise. And for sixth glorious months, I was at utter peace, but I knew the only bliss this wretched life has ever afforded me..."

* **Wallace Bryton:** "What... What..."
* **Howard Howe:** "What happened?"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Yeah..."
* **Howard Howe:** "Oh, my dear boy, you passed out right infront of me."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "So tired..."
* **Howard Howe:** "I mean, one moment I'm waxing lyrically about my many ocean voyages, next thing I know, you fell out of your chair and collapsed. I didn't know what it was until I looked down and saw this rather intimidating little spider crawl from out of your pant leg."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Sp-...Spider?..."
* **Howard Howe:** "Yes! A brown recluse. Rather toxic little insect, these woods are full of them."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Makes 'em, uh... Poisonous... Oh, shit, a spider bit me?..."
* **Howard Howe:** "Yes, I am so sorry."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Wheres my phone?"
* **Howard Howe:** "Phone?"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Mm-hm... I gotta make a call..."
* **Howard Howe:** "Well, I'm afraid the doctor stepped on it and broke it, and I'm afraid it lies in pieces."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "There's a doctor here?..."
* **Howard Howe:** "Yes! Dr. Mosier, lives just up the road, ehhh, eight miles..."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Mosier?"
* **Howard Howe:** "Yes!"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Heh, funny name..."
* **Howard Howe:** "Yeah! He was here within a half hour of your... Incident."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "I forget your name."
* **Howard Howe:** "My name? Howard Howe."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Mm... Howard, I can't feel my legs."
* **Howard Howe:** "Well, that would be the spinal injection, you see the-... Recluse stunk it's fangs into you and filled you with so much poison that your-... Your ankle was the size of an elephant's leg."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Oh, ho, ho! Shit. What kind of elephant?"
* **Howard Howe:** "A very fat one!"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Mm-hm-hm! Shit..."
* **Howard Howe:** "Yeah! So, with the venom traveling to your heart, it forced the doctor to save your life, to take rather, let us say, drastic measures..."

* **Wallace Bryton:** *\*Seeing his amputated leg\** "...Oh my god! Oh my god! Holy shit! I-I-I- theres no leg there!"
* **Howard Howe:** "Doesn't appear to be! Just let it out there, boy, let it all out..."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "My leg is off!!! Oh my god!"
* **Howard Howe:** "Nature can be very red in tooth and claw..."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "What?!"
* **Howard Howe:** "Tennyson!"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "The fuck are you talking about?! Why am I still here, why aren't I in the hospital?!"
* **Howard Howe:** "Well... Hospitals... Carry diseases! So, Dr. Mosier thought it would be best of you to stay here since the room is sanitized- and all day, well it'd be best if you recuperate here."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "It doesn't make any sense!"
* **Howard Howe:** "Spider! The spider bit you!"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "I wanna talk to this guy... Wheres the doctor? I wanna talk to him."
* **Howard Howe:** "Well, um, doctor's making his rounds..."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Rounds?! What rounds?! We're in the middle of nowhere!"
* **Howard Howe:** "Oh, no, no, no, no, no. No we're not. No we're not, Mr. Bryton. I've been to the middle of nowhere and it is a ghastly place."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "I don't wanna hear your fucking stories! ... What the fuck is this?! ... Why are you laughing?!"
* **Howard Howe:** "You're funny! Why, that's a belt to keep you falling out from the chair."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Why?!"
* **Howard Howe:** "The belt is to keep you falling over until the spinal wears off... Spinal wears off and you gain full control of your factories again! That is, most of your factories!"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Whaaa-... I need a phone, I gotta call my family..."
* **Howard Howe:** "Dr. Mosier removed all the phones from the house, he didn't want you disturbed."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "What the fuck?"
* **Howard Howe:** "So I'll- I'll talk to him and I can ask him if you can call home after supper."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "No, I gotta call..."
* **Howard Howe:** "So it'd be best if you take a nap, you're heavily, heavily tranquilized."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "I gotta tell my family... I gotta use a phone, I gotta talk to a doctor."
* **Howard Howe:** "Mosier! Dr. Mosier!"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "I wanna talk to him-"
* **Howard Howe:** "-Well, you can't, he's on his rounds..."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "You get me a phone..."
* **Howard Howe:** "Don't have a phone!... The doctor removed them all."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "That's insane..."
* **Howard Howe:** "Possibly so, but it's true."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Wait..."
* **Howard Howe:** "Sup at six, sharp."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Wait, wait... Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait..."
* **Howard Howe:** "I am, truly sorry for your loss."

* **Howard Howe:** "You're not eating?"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "I can't move my arms."
* **Howard Howe:** "Well... That would be the morphine... It is capitol for the leg pain, and perhaps the only thing that keeps you from howling in agony. But, it tends to leave one a bit sleepy."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "I'm not sleepy at all... I'm-... Immobilized."
* **Howard Howe:** "You know, I was thinking... The melancholy of losing a limb must be akin to... Mourning a close friend you, too often, took for granted."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "... There was no spider, was there?..."
* **Howard Howe:** "Yes, there was. A brown recluse. Colloquially called a *hobo spider.*"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Ah, that's interesting... -And you saw it?"
* **Howard Howe:** "Yes."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "-You saw the spider?"
* **Howard Howe:** "... I just wish that I had spied the little creature before it so viciously attacked you."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "-What'd it look like?..."
* **Howard Howe:** "The arachnid assailant?"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Yeah..."
* **Howard Howe:** "Well... A typical spider... A legion of legs, you know, *et cetera, et cetera.*.. It was very small, though... So small, you might even call it *itsy bitsy*... *The itsy bitsy spiiii-der crawled up the water spout...*"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "... Holy shit..."
* **Howard Howe:** "*Down came the rain, and washed the spider out..."*

### *OG. Dialogue*

* **Wallace Bryton:** "So I was trying to see who answered the door, 'all staring through the peep-hole, watching like a creepy fucking podiatrist..."
* **Teddy Craft:** "Podiatrist?"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Like 'To Catch A Predator.'"
* **Teddy Craft:** "Pederast."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "What'd I say?"
* **Teddy Craft:** "'Foot Doctor.'"

* **Wallace Bryton:** "So I'm asleep in my hotel room, and I get woke up by this rumbling outside my door."
* **Teddy Craft:** "And it was the Rapture."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "I wish. I'm not religious, but I wanna be with Jesus. If he can turn a bottle of wine into a thousand bottles of wine, who knows what kinda magic he can work with weed?"
* **Teddy Craft:** "It all comes back to weed with you."

* **Howard Howe:** "'The sun was shining on the sea, shining with all his might. ... 'He did his very best to make the billows smooth and bright...'"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "H-... Hello?..."
* **Howard Howe:** "And this was odd, because it was-..."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Uhnnn..."
* **Howard Howe:** "'The sea was wet as wet could be, the sands were dry as dry...'"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Wh-... What's-... Goin' on..."
* **Howard Howe:** "'You could not see a cloud, because no cloud was in the sky... No birds were flying overhead... There were no birds to fly...'"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "The fuck-... Is this..."
* **Howard Howe:** "'The time has come,' the walrus said, 'To talk of many things. Of shoes and ships and sealing-wax, of cabbages and kings!'"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Hey! I can't mo-... I can't fuckin' move!..."
* **Howard Howe:** "'And why the sea is boiling hot. ... And whether pigs have wings...'"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Can you help me?... I can't move..."
* **Howard Howe:** "'A loaf of bread,' the walrus said, 'Is what we chiefly need!'"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "What’s that?... What the fuck’s-... H-Hey, man... What’s that noi-..."
* **Howard Howe:** "'Pepper and vinegar besides are very good indeed!'"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "HELP! SOMEBODY FUCKIN’ HELLPP! ... NO, DON'T-... N-mmmmmmmm! MMMMMMMM!!!"
* **Howard Howe:** "'Now if you're ready, oyster dear...'"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "MMM! MMMMM!! MMMMMMMM!!! MMMM!!!"
* **Howard Howe:** "'We can begin to feed...'"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "MMM! MMM! MMMMMMMM!!!"

* **Ally Leon:** "I don't want you to go to Canada."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "Allyyy..."
* **Ally Leon:** "I know you don't wanna hear it..."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "I really don't. I just had me a 24 Karat case o’ cum, okay? And now I’m smoking my Gretzky, so this is like... A perfect moment in life. You only get maybe ten of these. Ever. A month. So please, don’t harsh my buzz with this 'middle America bullshit' again, right before I’m leaving on a jet plane. I gotta take a Canadeuce, right?"
* **Ally Leon:** "Can you try to be more sensitive about my 'middle America bullshit'? Please, okay? It's always hard for me when you do shows about sex."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "I’m sorry. I know. I love you, right? It’s just for the podcast. You know that."
* **Ally Leon:** "I wanna go with you this trip."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "NO."
* **Ally Leon:** "Why?"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "They’re swingers. If you come along, they’ll try to fuck you, too."
* **Ally Leon:** "So? You might fuck someone else this weekend..."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "I’m definitely fucking someone else this weekend, swinger-dude’s wife."
* **Ally Leon:** "Asshole..."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "What’d I say? C’mon, Ally... Why do we gotta do this every time? You knew the deal when we got together. I said, from the jump, that if we’re gonna do this relationship thing, I still gotta be able to do weird shit, just so I can have stories to tell on the show. That’s how I earn my living, okay? Doing fucked up shit for the podcast is my career. You know this, you started out as a fan!"
* **Ally Leon:** "I WAS a fan."
* **Wallace Bryton:** "I’m gonna stop doing the shows about sex, okay? But right now, that 'AbracaTravel' asshole who stole my whole act? He’s getting better ads than us!"
* **Ally Leon*:*** "So what?!"
* *Wallace Bryton;* "We’re losing sponsors to this 'AbracaTravelin' piece of shit! So I gotta be able to do more fucked up shit or the show’s over."
* **Ally Leon:** "It’s just... A FUCKING... PODCAST!"
* **Wallace Bryton:** "That’s bullshit, man. I made a hundred grand on ads alone last year, before the live shows and t-shirts... And I’ve got NBC coming to see my showcase. Why? Because of an agent? Because of auditioning over and over like I’m a fuckin’ jerk? No. I got all that from doing-... 'Just... A fucking... Podcast!” ... Fuck 'AbracaTravel.' I’m gonna do whatever kinda fucked up shows it takes to beat their downloads and be number one again. ... Cut me some slack, okay? I’m fighting for my life out there!"

## Kill-Count

1. **Mackerel** —*Eaten by Wallace after surgery: shown.*
2. **Howard Howe** —*Stabbed to death by Wallace's tusks: shown.*
3. **2nd mackerel** —*Eaten by Wallace in his sanctuary: shown.*

#### *Total kill-count; 3*

> *1 man* *2 fish/unknowns*
>
>

## Trivia

* Wallace is briefly mentioned in *Yoga Hosers*, the spin-off to Tusk, though he is never actually seen.
* His last name, *Bryton*, is spelled *"Brighton"* in the script.
* In the script, Wallace's name is changed to *"Wallace-rus"* after his walrus transformation.
* Wallace's name sounds like *"walrus,"* which was obviously intentional. However, the name *Wallace* also means *"foreigner,"* which goes along with him coming from America and being inept in navigating Canada.
* Though this is not canonically confirmed, Wallace does seem to be a bisexual coded character, with instances of him being very open about his sexual activities to other men, making sexual jokes with other men, being almost "flirtatious" towards Howard on a few instances, having drawn posters of him in sexual poses with his best friend Teddy in their office, and his overall open sexuality gives the impression that he is possibly on the bisexual spectrum.
* Despite not being fond of the only family members he explicitly mentions (his mother and grandmother), he does repeatedly tell Howard that he needs to call his family after discovering his amputated leg, implying that he has other immediate family he does talk to.
* He used to cry at Winnie the Pooh.
* He used to be a Star Wars fan, and often made Star Wars related puns.
* He, alongside Teddy, is likely a fan of superheroes due to the many posters of them dressed as superheroes in their office.
* Though this is not canonically stated, the community on Personality-database.com has agreed that he is an ENTP.
* His favorite drink is Chug-Eh Lug, and even has Chug-Eh Lug cups in his enclosure at the ending of the film.
* Wallace is seemingly scared of dolls, since when he uses Howard's bathroom, he turns a doll around so its back is turned to him. This was based on a childhood memory of Smith's he originally told on his podcast, *SModcast.*

### *Behind the scenes related trivia*

* In the original script, Wallace was much more mean and crude. However, actor *Justin Long* suggested to *Kevin Smith* to make Wallace more likable, stating that he didn't want the audience to hate his character immediately.
* *Smith* enjoyed the Chug-Eh Lug cups for the convenience store scenes so much, that he made sure to put them as many shots as possible.
* When in the walrus suit, *Long* had to hold his tongue back to give the effect of a *"cut off"* tongue, which caused him to drool within many of his walrus scenes.
* The walrus suit was made from foam and polyester, and the tusks on Wallace's face were connected by magnets.
* All of the scenes featuring Wallace as a walrus were shot at one time to avoid getting in-and-out of it.
* Wallace's bushy mustache was *Long's* idea, and he tried growing it as *"walrus-like"* as possible.
* Wallace's ringtone was originally a fan-made song that *Smith* and *Ralph* *Garman* featured on their podcast, *Hollywood Babble-On*, that was based on *Garman's* impression of *Al Pacino*.