Snatched

**"Snatched"**is the eleventh episode of *Rewritten* and the 11th episode overall.

It was published on August 8, 2017.

In the episode, Toons are horrified when a shopkeeper is kidnapped by the Sellbots and taken deep inside their newly-discovered headquarters. The Resistance formulates a plan to recover the shopkeeper.

## The Episode

=====Oak Street=====

==Present Day==

Detective Lima of the Spill the Beans Detective Agency yawned as she pulled on her coat to go to the late-night grocery store. She desperately needed milk. Lima was willing to risk walking the streets at night with the Cogs blah blah blah. She was a fighter now. She had gags.

Her family couldn't believe she was still living on Oak Street despite the uncovering of a mammoth entrance to Sellbot Headquarters earlier that month. It didn't really bother Lima all that much. The Cogs were in for a real surprise if they tried to convert her building into a Cog monstrosity again. She had been training her Gags nonstop. She closed the agency two hours earlier every day now so that she would have more time to practice. Now there were *real* Cogs she could lob cakes at. It was thrilling.

As Lima exited the shop, she smiled at the Toon Resistance membership sticker she had stamped on the front window. She wanted everyone to know how proud she was to be a member of such an outstanding organization. Down with the Cogs!

Someone grabbed her.

It was a Mingler. It didn't say anything. Lima wriggled in distress, trying to get away, but the Cog's grip held fast. Lima's feet lifted off the ground. The Mingler was *flying away* with her!

Lima opened her mouth to scream, but they had flown into the clouds.

*It's going to drop me*, Lima thought with fear. *I'll fall hundreds of feet to the ground and die instantly. Terribly. Shatter like glass.*

The Mingler passed through a grey cloud of smoke and Lima looked down. A grey wasteland lay before her. She saw Cogs shoveling coal out of a huge pit, piling it around. Everywhere was grey and black. There was no light. A factory spitting pollution into the sky was in the distance. The Mingler was flying toward the top of a tall tower. One of four towers, each one taller than the next. The tallest was their destination.

Lima twisted her torso to look behind her, back toward home. It was shrouded behind the smog. She couldn't see the colors of her world.

Terror now shook every part of Lima's body.

*I'm being kidnapped*.

Eileen hit her head on the desk.

"I hate Vidalia VaVoom," she murmured into the wood.

Constance Miller nodded in agreement. Because of the biggest gossip to ever curse the face of the earth, everyone in Toontown knew of the abduction of Detective Lima Benn. And now *everyone* was scared of the streets.

They had reason to be. Eileen recognized that. But mass hysteria was spreading fast. The Toon Resistance would have to act quickly. But Eileen had no idea what to do. March up to the Cogs and demand Lima back? Threaten them with...gags or something?

"I have an idea," Constance said.

"Tell me," Eileen said.

But the phone rang. Eileen snatched it up.

"Eileen? Darling? It's Clarabelle."

Eileen wanted to groan.

"This isn't a good time, Clarabelle."

"I was just wondering what you were going to do about poor Lima. What should I tell my callers?"

*Tell them to go to hell*, Eileen desired to retort. But she swallowed her pride.

"Tell them the Toon Resistance will safely recover Lima and continue to fight back the Cogs. Thank you."

"She acts like a reporter, doesn't she?" Constance said. "Calls my office twice a week asking the most intrusive questions."

"She and Vidalia are going to start the next witch trials if we're not careful."

Constance laughed. Eileen smiled back.

"You said you had a plan?"

Constance cracked her knuckles.

"We should assemble a team and storm Sellbot Headquarters. Go right to the top Cog. Whoever that may be. Find Lima and blow out."

Eileen frowned.

"We don't know anything about Sellbot Headquarters. We only just discovered it. I can't just send Toons in there. They might die. If the Sellbots have a leader, it'll be pretty powerful. Nothing like we've seen before."

Constance shook her head.

"I doubt it. It'll probably just be an extra proud Mr. Hollywood. Besides, a Toon hasn't died since our return from Exodus. A few have gone sad, sure, but they just come right back here to the Playground and get Tooned up."

Eileen thought it over. It wasn't the worst idea. It was just incredibly risky.

The phone rang again. Eileen eyed it with ire. She wanted to rip it out of the wall.

"This is the Mayor," Eileen said into the receiver.

"Is Constance there? This is Deputy Aleck."

Eileen held out the phone to Constance.

"For you. Lucky."

"Constance," she said as she took the phone. Her face changed. "Idiots," she grumbled. She hung up and turned to Eileen.

"We have to go to the station. We have fourteen sad teenage Toons who just tried to storm Sellbot Headquarters."

The fourteen Toons had recovered by the time Constance and Eileen had arrived. They all looked petrified, sitting rigidly in their chairs, most of them clasping mugs of hot cocoa.

"Alright," Constance said, pulling up a chair to face them. "What happened?"

Eileen expected one of them, the natural leader, to speak up, but all of them began babbling at once. Each one adding his or her voice to the story. But the clamoring squeaks and oinks and grrrs only frustrated Eileen.

"ONE," she barked, "at a time."

And then silence. Eileen was ready to scream.

"You," Constance said, pointing at a thin, lanky rabbit, who blinked rapidly when her finger landed at his face.

"Me?" he repeated dumbly. Constance nodded. Eileen feigned a polite smile.

"Well," the rabbit said, clearing his throat, "we decided to go save Lima."

"What prompted you to do this?" Constance asked. "Surely you knew the risk?"

"Lima is my aunt," a yellow dog said.

"Ah," Constance said. "And these are your friends who offered to help?"

"Yes," the dog said, her bottom lip quivering. "I just wanted my aunt back."

"What made you think that going into Sellbot Headquarters was a good idea?" Eileen asked. "Not even the most experienced members of the Toon Resistance have ventured inside."

Everyone shifted uncomfortably.

"Safety in numbers," a pig mumbled.

Eileen sucked in her cheeks. They could have been killed. And then fourteen pairs of parents would have barged into her office demanding retribution.

"Tell us *everything* about Sellbot Headquarters," Constance said. She leaned back in her chair, watching the teens intently. They all looked at the rabbit, who had become their designated speaker.

"Um," the rabbit squeaked, off to a great start, "we walked through the tunnel. It's quite long, and most of it is underground. No stairs, just a decline ramp and an incline that pops you out in the center of the headquarters."

"It's horrible," a duck quacked.

"Terrible..." a red cat purred.

"There's nothing but desolation," the rabbit said, raising his voice above the rest, clearly enjoying his newfound power. "It's like they're harvesting coal. Heavy smoke and smog covers the place. The headquarters is basically a coal pit. Cogs, all Sellbots naturally, were walking around, digging the pit, or operating machinery. They had cranes and shovels that were digging as well. I don't know what they were trying to dig up."

"Is that all that's there?" Eileen asked, "A pit?"

"No," the rabbit said, closing his eyes to remember. "Directly ahead, when you walk in, were four towers. The one on the left was short, and each one to the right was slightly taller. It looked like a sales chart...you know, the symbol of the Sellbots."

"Administrative offices," Eileen said. "Like the Cog buildings."

The rabbit nodded.

"There was also a tunnel leading to a factory, but we didn't go there. We figured Detective Lima was in the tower."

"Tallest tower," Lima's niece said. "Like the fairy tales."

"There were four sets of doors," the rabbit went on, "that led into the towers. We moved around the pit, avoided Cogs, and approached the doors."

"The Cogs didn't mind that you were there?" Constance asked, her eyebrows raised. "It seems that they would have been astonished or angry."

The rabbit shrugged. "They didn't say or do anything to us. Besides, we had gags. We weren't going anywhere without a fight."

"Amen," a bear said.

"So," the rabbit said, leaning forward, "we tried the door to the tower and it was unlocked. We saw Cogs coming out of it earlier, so we were prepared to wait for another one if necessary to grab the door. But since it was unlocked, we all went inside."

He swallowed, and then shivered.

"The door closed behind us," he said in a weak voice. The others cringed, almost in synchronization. "And it was like being plunged into hell."

"It was suffocating!" Lima's niece cried.

"We couldn't hear, we couldn't see, we couldn't breathe," the rabbit said. "Everything went black. We could feel the Cogs. They were grabbing us. There were so many...we..."

"We screamed," the duck said.

"And screamed," the rabbit said. "But it only lasted a few seconds. Our laff had dropped completely. The next thing I knew, I woke up in the Gardens, paralyzed with fear, and with no laff, and my backpack gone."

"All of ours," the niece said. "The Cogs took all our gags."

Eileen exhaled. She hadn't noticed she was holding her breath.

"What was behind the door?" she asked in a whisper.

"We don't know," the rabbit said. "The door closing triggered the sadness."

"An environment in which Toons cannot thrive," Constance said, crossing her arms and thinking hard. "The headquarters itself isn't like that probably because it's outside. But being sealed inside a place like that...it's unbearable on our laff."

"Why not Cog buildings?" Eileen asked.

Constance thought, then snapped her fingers.

"The air. The air ducts in the Cog buildings sucks in air from the streets, our air. But in Sellbot Headquarters, the air is theirs. Their pollution. Toons cannot be encased in that. Our lungs won't take it."

"Disgusting," Eileen said, wrinkling her snout.

Constance stood and gave a professional bow to the children.

"Thank you for your story. You've been very helpful. But don't ever play hero again. Not until you're older. We'll get Lima back. I promise."

Eileen followed Constance out of the interview room. They hastened down the hallway to Constance's office.

"We need to find a way to get inside those Sellbot towers without going sad," Constance said. Eileen pursed her lips.

"I don't see how. Oxygen tanks?"

Constance scoffed.

"I don't think so. It has to do with our laff. Our laff cannot survive in there. So we need something to protect our laff."

"Like a shield?" Eileen said.

Constance stood up quickly.

"Let's ask Professor Prepostera. He spent three years studying Cogs. He might be able to help!"

"That's a great idea!" Eileen said. "Where is he based now?"

"The schoolhouse," Constance said. "He's been covering for Professor Pete."

Lima Benn opened her eyes. She was lying on her back, her legs bent under her body. Pain rippled through her back. She pressed her arms on the ground to push herself up, and she realized the floor was not solid. It was barred.

So was the ceiling.

Lima scrambled to her feet. She was locked in a cage. Fighting her better judgment, Lima looked down.

From the vertiginous height she saw a vast expanse of grey. A large grey platform with two identical grey ramps leading down to a metal landing. Then another grey ramp and another grey landing. Culminating in a octagonal platform overlooking an abyss of nothing. The octagon was painted with concentric circles. In the center was a gear emblazoned with the symbol of the Sellbots. Two Cogs were flying away from it.

A landing strip?

Lima looked behind her. A clock was clicking loudly. Below her, an enormous grinding sound emanated from inside the tower. Two doors sliding apart.

And then a machine rolled out.

Lima screamed.

Professor Patrick Prepostera was writing at Pete's desk when Constance and Eileen entered. He looked up and donned a smile.

"Hi," he said.

"Professor," Constance said, sitting in one of the plush green armchairs reserved for parents and disciplined students, "we have a dilemma."

Eileen and Constance explained what the teenagers described at Sellbot Headquarters. They asked Prepostera for some solution to bypass the laff destroying atmosphere.

He mulled over it for a few minutes, asking several clarifying questions.

"I can't think of anything," he said finally. "I mean, laff is what makes Toons what they are. You can't put anything around it to protect it from that sort of environment."

Eileen's heart sank.

"There's *nothing* we can do?"

Prepostera shook his head.

"No. That place will always be for the Cogs and the Cogs alone."

"But what about Detective Lima Benn?" Constance demanded. "She's stranded there!"

Prepostera nodded, his eyes closed.

"I know," he said quietly. "I don't know how to help her."

Eileen sighed.

"Thank you anyway," she said.

Clerk Clara greeted the familiar face of Slate Oldman as he glided into her shop. It wasn't often she got to see him; after all, his Gag Shop was in the Brrrgh.

"What brings you to Toontown Central?" Clara asked, refilling Slate's gag order.

"I have something for you," Slate said and put a bag on the counter. Clara eyed it with interest. Slate dumped its contents on the table. Seven in total. Four were blue boxes with red buttons, or Gag Boxes as they were now called. One expanded into a towering wedding cake with seven tiers. Another was a bullhorn, like the ones used for sound. And the third was a ladder, still small on the counter.

"New gags," Slate said simply. "One for each track."

Clara gaped.

"You developed gags?" She wasn't sure what to do with them. She couldn't just have Toons all over Toontown creating their own gags. It could lead to mayhem.

"Top tier Gags," Slate said. "The most powerful. They should only be used in extreme situations and Toons should only be able to carry one of each at a time. Allow me to demonstrate."

What ensued was a presentation for Clara. Slate showed her the high dive Toonup, which had her cackling like she had never laughed before. The presentation and train tracks went hand-in-hand, providing the most powerful Gag yet. The opera singer nearly shattered Clara's ears, but she loved it all the same. The wedding cake was incredible, breaking into four different cakes when thrown, being able to attack all Cogs at once. The geyser the same, except for squirt. The last Gag was what Slate called the Toontanic, but declined to demonstrate, saying it was much larger than the piano and far too dangerous to be exhibited in a Toon building. Clara agreed and thanked Slate for the gags.

She might not be able to implement them herself, but she would present them to Toon Headquarters. The new Gags would give Toons a final Gag to build up to. A Gag more powerful than anything else in its track.

"Madam Mayor," Dr. Kilo Byte said with surprise as he opened his front door and found Eileen Irenic and Constance Miller on his doorstep. He dropped his screwdriver as if embarrassed by it and hurried to shake Eileen's hand. Constance bowed her head in greeting. "How can I be of assistance?"

"We have a problem," Eileen said. "You've heard about Detective Lima?"

Dr. Byte stared, no recognition on his face.

"What about her? Is she sick?"

Constance started laughing. "You're probably the only person in Toontown who doesn't know. Keep away from Vidalia VaVoom do you?"

"Oh yes," Dr. Byte said emphatically. "All she does is gossip and spread rumors. It's toxic."

"I admire you," Eileen said. "Very few Toons can keep away from her juicy stories."

"So what happened?" Dr. Byte asked, scratching his cheek. His glasses were smudged with grease. He quickly realized his guests were still standing outside and beckoned them inside. Eileen stared around in appreciation at Kilo's house. It had a mechanical theme to it, but tastefully so. She noticed he also kept up with the latest furniture fads, as several of the hottest items from Clarabelle's Cattlelog were scattered around the main room.

"Detective Lima was kidnapped," Constance said darkly. "Taken inside Sellbot Headquarters."

Dr. Byte's mouth fell open. He stifled a gasp. Constance and Eileen quickly explained the rest--the headquarters, the towers, the suffocating sadness that existed behind the metal walls, and most importantly the urge to recover Detective Lima swiftly.

"Hmm," Dr. Byte said. "Let's think about it another way. We can't go into the towers because we have laff. So we have to have an opposite of laff to stay inside."

"But our laff is what makes us Toons," Eileen said.

Dr. Byte suddenly smiled.

"What's the opposite of a Toon?"

"A Cog," Constance said with a smirk. But when Kilo kept smiling, Constance frowned. "Wait, seriously?"

"Uh huh," Kilo said. "How do you think Cogs stay alive in there? They have Cog meters. It's like their laff. To get inside Sellbot Headquarters, to infiltrate their own turf, we can't be Toons. We have to be Cogs."

Eileen grimaced.

"I don't like the sound of that."

"What do we do?" Constance asked. "How do we become Cogs?"

Kilo retrieved his screwdriver from the floor and snatched his coat from the rack.

"I know someone who can help."

Detective Lima awoke to Cogspeak. They were conversing below her. When Lima shifted her weight to look down, she reeled to see they were staring up at her. Talking *about* her.

"It's almost ready," a Two-Face said to a Mr. Hollywood. "It'll need a few more hours. The Creator was detailed with his plans."

"Excellent," the Mr. Hollywood said. "Can you guarantee success?"

The Two-Face's candor astonished Lima.

"No. There is a 43% chance of success."

"And the other 57%?"

"Death."

Lima began panicking. What were they going to do to her?

Dr. Hyla Sensitive was excited to see Eileen and Constance again. She had earned their friendship after their journey into Chipper Acres. She was even more eager to see Dr. Kilo Byte, who shuffled awkwardly up to her and pecked her cheek. She blushed a darker shade of pink than her natural tone.

"Hyla," Kilo said with an equally awkward grin, "do you still have those Cog suits?"

Hyla disappeared into the back of her shop and returned with a dolly carrying an empty Cold Caller suit.

"She's been collecting Cog parts," Kilo said with pride. "She reconstructed this suit herself."

"I have nine of them total," Hyla said. "And one Pencil Pusher suit. It's difficult to do, but they're fully functional."

"...Why?" was all Constance said.

"Oh," Hyla said. "I thought having Cog suits might be helpful...in case we needed to infiltrate or something."

"You were right," Eileen said. "I'm so glad you took that initiative. We'll need as many suits as you can give us. We're storming Sellbot Headquarters."

Hyla gaped.

"Oh. Okay. Well...I have nine Cold Caller suits. The Pencil Pusher suit won't work because they'll recognize you're not a Sellbot. I should warn you though...these suits...they make you feel like a Cog. You'll walk like a Cog, talk like a Cog..."

"But think like a Toon," Kilo said, beaming.

"Do we have to um..." Constance shuddered, "put the head on?"

"No, no," Hyla said. "The Cogs are too stupid to even recognize a Toon head moving in sync with a Cog body."

"Can we fight in those things?" Constance asked.

"No," Hyla said. "You'll have to take the suit off to use your Gags."

"Element of surprise," Kilo said.

"Great!" Eileen said. "Then we have our plan. Nine of us will storm Sellbot Headquarters as soon as possible. When can you have those suits ready?"

"Um," Hyla said, glancing at the hollow shell next to her, an eerie carcass of a dead Cog. "Tomorrow morning for sure. I just need to switch the Cog meters on. I'll teleport them to Oak Street so you will all be ready to go in the morning."

"I'll put together a team," Eileen said, mostly to herself. "Will the three of you agree to come?"

"Yes!"

"Of course."

"Certainly."

"Alright then!" Eileen said, clapping her paws together. "Lima, we're coming to get you."

Dr. Kilo Byte turned the key in his lock at his estate. He had to be well-rested for his journey into Sellbot Headquarters tomorrow morning. The first lock clicked open. Dr. Byte stuck the second key in the second lock--an extra safety precaution--and began to turn it.

"I think it's my move."

Dr. Byte's blood turned to ice. He fumbled to open the door, but the Mover & Shaker was too quick. He was snatched from behind.

Lima shook Dr. Byte awake. He had been lifted into the cage by the mammoth Sellbot leader. Lima had tried to jump out, but the Cog had pushed her back in.

"What?" the mouse said, quivering, "Where am I?"

"Sellbot Headquarters," Lima said grimly. "Wake up. Get your senses straight. They're coming back for us."

"What? Why? What are they going to do?"

"I don't know," Lima said. "But I think it's going to be painful."

Piggy Pie's phone blared. She groggily slumped out of bed and lifted the phone off the wall.

"Clarabelle I swear to God if you try the late-night Cattlelog sales pitches again..."

"It's Eileen."

"Oh," Piggy Pie. "What's wrong?"

"They took Dr. Byte. We're going tonight."

## Production

### Continuity and Story Arcs

Fitting in with the canon of Toontown Rewritten and Toontown Online, a shopkeeper was kidnapped by the Sellbots and taken inside headquarters. In this episode, the first kidnapped Toon was Detective Lima, though she is not an SOS Toon in the game. In the game, the Cog suits are only to help Toons get access to the elevator, acting as a disguise. In this alternative story, the Cog suits, designed by Dr. Hyla Sensitive, are necessary to keep Toons alive, as the Cog world is too much for a Toon's laff. Dr. Byte later became the second Toon kidnapped.

The Sellbot Vice President (VP) made his first appearance in this episode, though not by name or description.

Level 7 Gags were integrated into the Gag program after Slate gave them to Clerk Clara.

### References

Eileen and Constance indireclty refer to the 1692 Salem Witch Trials when talking about the mass hysteria spreading due to Vidalia VaVoom and Clarabelle Cow.

The line "Lima, we're coming to get you" is a reference to the popular line from *Doctor Who's*first season episode "Bad Wolf" when the 9th Doctor tells Rose Tyler "I'm coming to get you."

## Trivia

* The original title for this episode was "Abduction," but producers changed it to "Snatched" to make it sound more interesting.
* Constance's deputy is named Aleck, named for DI Alec Hardy from *Broadchurch*, the same TV show that derived Constance's surname, Miller.