Episode 3/Quotes

## How to Love Someone

Below is a list of quotes from the third episode of the *Shimoneta* anime series, "How to Love Someone", which premiered on July 18, 2015.

* **Ayame**: PERVERT ALERT!

* **Tanukichi**: Otome Saotome caught me.
* **Ayame**: Ohh, so that explains why she boxed you in like that. *(shows a picture of Otome on top of Tanukichi)*
* **Tanukichi**: HOW'D YOU GET THAT?! HUH?!
* **Ayame**: *(opens her flip phone)* You really are a foul-mouthed pervert.
* **Tanukichi**: No, I'm not!

* **Ayame**: Come on! Wouldn't it be a blast to fill such an innocent girl's mind with acts about sex until her sweet little "hima" hula-hoops?
* **Tanukichi**: Not really, no.
* **Ayame**: Are you sure about that? 'Cause if it goes well, then I can help you get it going with Anna. *(Tanukichi reacts surprised. Ayame sighs.)* So predictable. I shouldn't be surprised, though, it's the same old story. You nasty boys are always pitching tents in your pants like you're on safari with rhinos, elk, and unicorns running through your pants!
* **Tanukichi**: *(covers his crotch)* Hey, I am not horny for Anna!
* **Ayame**: It's nothing to be embarrassed about. I mean, so what if all you really wanna do is stick your custard cannon in her glazed donut? What's wrong with that?
* **Tanukichi**: Okay, now look, Ms. Kajou. Let me be perfectly clear here. I do not have any desire to do the thing you just described with Anna.
* **Ayame**: *(gasps in horror)* Wait, don't tell me! It's her butthole that you're after!
* **Tanukichi**: YOU KNOW THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!

* **Ayame**: All this chastity is grossing me out.
* **Tanukichi**: HOW CAN IT BE GROSS?!
* **Ayame**: Let me tell you something, Tanukichi. You can't just remove the nuts and bolts from boy-girl relationships. In the end, she wants every inch of your pure hard-on and you should be looking up her skirt.
* **Tanukichi**: How dare you soil my flowery words in mud!
* **Ayame**: The act of love-making isn't something that's dirty or immoral. When two people gradually reveal their intimate parts to one another, bringing together their most sensitive areas in sweet harmony, it's their continued acceptance of each other that forms a bond. And it's not just a physical one, it joins their hearts. Don't you see? That's why dirty jokes are beautiful. But let's end the levity here.

* **Ayame**: I guess you could say I really...blow her big time!
* **Tanukichi**: YOU MEAN "OWE" HER!
* **Ayame**: Anyway, I'll leave the matter of Otome Saotome in your capable hands. *(laughs)*
* **Tanukichi**: If this is the socially acceptable version of you that Anna likes, I'd hate to see what you used to be like!

* **Otome**: An artist needs plenty of calories to create, gotta eat!

* **Ayame**: In case you hadn't noticed, Gouriki likes Anna, though I'm not sure he even knows it. That's why he totally flipped out when Anna suggested you join the Council and why he's had it in for you ever since. Now with the stalker situation, his instincts to protect Anna have kicked in and only hardened him.
* **Tanukichi**: Poor Gouriki.
* **Ayame**: *(giggles and opens her flip phone)* By the way, in case it wasn't clear, I meant "hardened" his heart, not his dick, though maybe!
* **Tanukichi**: Gee, thanks for clarifying that! Can't you go five whole minutes without being gross?
* **Ayame**: Five holes? That's a lot of orifices.

* **Ayame**: FUCK ME! *(rolls on the floor)* SHIT, PISS, FUCK, CUNT, COCKSUCKER, MOTHERFUCKER, TITS, SHIT, PISS, FUCK, CUNT, COCKSUCKER, MOTHERFUCKER, TITS!

* **Ayame**: *(opens her flip phone)* That's why she glared at me with the envy of a horny little virgin boy eyeing a laced double-D brazier for the first time!

* **Tanukichi**: Kajou, please, just calm down a bit, alright?
* **Ayame**: Huh, go down on your dick all night?
* **Tanukichi**: I DIDN'T SAY THAT! Come on, be serious!

* **Ayame**: Instinct is crucial. It's also known as your libido.

* **Ayame**: We can screw both things...I mean...do both things at once!

* **Gouriki**: Are you coo-coo banana pants?