Encyclopedia Venturia

## Caution: Extremely NSFW

**Venturian Battle** is perhaps the worst show ever made. 1001 Spears, having run out of ideas and thinking about how to make a profit by doing something other than making shit video game movies, decided to make a bootleg of *Fast and the Furious*. It is a shitshow about people climbing walls and having the impossible aiming skills of *Uncharted* (which is something else they ripped off; they clearly stole from almost everything). The only possible shred of originality in it is the name "Venturian Battle", a title which no show has taken thus far. This still Epic Failed because there's a Garry's Mod YouTuber named Venturian Tale, and the average Zoomer viewer is going to notice this nigh-immediately.

Despite being aimed at Gen Z weeaboos, the show's plot is shamelessly stolen from the 9/11 attacks and the War on Terror, even though most Zoomers didn't witness the attacks and weeaboos will do anything in their power to pretend that America never existed. The blood in this pussy ass show is rendered as white in an effort to remain PG-13 despite all the deaths, making it look like some weird murder hentai. The show tries to appeal to weeaboos because of the Animu character designs and waifus. It is very clear that it is a worthless pile of shit not worthy of any human beings' time.

It made OVER 9000 million dollars and got a second season, proving that people love to watch actual shit.

## Purpose

LOL, THERE'S NO PURPOSE TO THIS. ALL IT DOES IS MAKE PEOPLE THINK THAT THERE ARE COUNTRIES CALLED VENTURIA OR SOME SHIT.

### Plot

The plot of the show is about as shit as everything else in it is; Al Qaeda blows people up and they die. The Americans shoot Al Qaeda and they die. There you go. We just saved seven hours of your time.

Each "episode" is an unoriginal action movie scenario with garbage characters who don't develop or do anything memorable. Any sane human being would dismember themselves from watching the pure amount of shit on display. The characters are literally just archetypes; "the rich guy", "the abused girl", "the villain".

The title is literally the name of their organization which begs the question, who the fuck names their company "Venturian Battle"? They live in a country named "Venturia" but literally where does the "battle" come from? Were they expecting Al Qaeda to attack them? In that case, was the government behind the "war" the whole time? None of these questions get answered in the show, because who needs logic when you can watch action scenes that were directed by a man who eats his own semen for fun.

Season Two doesn't even continue off of the first season, furthering that it's a waste of time. The plot to this season is basically that everyone goes to Japan so they can shoehorn in more weeb pandering. Wow.

## Characters

### You're wasting your time on an overdeveloped anime ripoff

* **Roger Jacobson**: Literally just Robert Jacob. Venturian Battle couldn't be original if it could make them another cent.
* **Robyn Jade**: Feminist propaganda attempt that fails in all regards. The size of her tits is an issue people discuss which shows how few damns you should give about this dumb fucking show. Her personality is anxiety, wanting to become an hero, and being unoriginal as fuck. She is a copy and paste of the chick from Metamorphosis, Robyn is the most 2D character you will fucking meet, terrible stuff happens to her and that's it.
* **Clay Morgana**: "Based" and "redpilled" Christian boomer who hates Robyn for most of the show. Gets bluepilled after finding out his daughter is lesbian, probably wants to bang her since Venturian Battle is unoriginal enough for Trigger to rip himself off and make Morgugu The Young Life of Robyn Jacob.
* **Saad Ayman Nein**: Osama Bin Laden. He hides behind a screen and does nothing, kind of like the Mouth of IETO from Rhett Druidus BUT LOL THEY KILLED HIM HE CAN'T BE IN THIS.
* **Barnett Felix**: A disgusting piece of shit who jerks his little penis whenever Robyn comes onscreen, before enacting sexual fantasies of him beating her senseless with a body pillow. Also has a car that he will probably deck the fuck out with anime decals and overpriced figurines, when the war is over, assuming he doesn't just splatter every square inch of it white. A general representation of weaboos who will probably sympathize with him.
* **Persephone Morgana**: 15-year-old closet lesbian who got abducted by IETO for "reeducation." No personality.
* **Subaru Honda**: Weaboo pandering character (moreso than everyone else). If you couldn't tell by his name, he's a Japanese guy who is the best evar at working with cars. Wears a Five Nights at Freddy's mask for no real reason other than trying to leech off of other fanbases. Mio Honda's only character traits are that he has abandoned racing with honor to make a cheap buck fighting for ISIS and stressing every fucking consonant. A shit "character," as with the rest of the Venturian Battle husks.
* **Xavier Peridot**: Secretly an ISIS cunt with bombs from Afghanistan, jihadist rip-off. It was extremely discriminatory for the director not to recognize the "Iumists" with their due "Allahu Akbar." Peridot also has little discernible character other than looking gross as fuck, being a Gary Stu who tries to make the show not seem Islamophobic and beating it to Futa cock.
* **Kidkiller**: Basically every EDM artist down to the tacky emo mask but this time he is too busy trying to motivate pro-choice liberals with his murdering his son bullshit to call people autistic or f\*ggots like Dead "I got forgotten after 2012" Mau5. Kidkiller doesn't have any obvious personality other than explaining why the idea of having a kid frightened him which somehow carried into him getting possessed by Evil Venturian Battle and having a year-late abortion???? What? Gives gritty fucking speeches about how comforting it is to murder people, oh you are so gritty boy, you feel content with executing people, so distressing, I'm so horrified.
* **Al-Ben Kazan**: Arabic Hulk. Black Adam was rightfully killed for being an overpowered cunt who is somehow ten feet tall and can bench a Jeep Cherokee while murdering people by throwing Picantos at them.
* **Lena Alba**: Lesbian and ~~Jewish~~ athiest loli who almost gets blown up before getting abducted by ISIS twice. That's her whole character, also loves it when Al Qaeda gives her a bulld\*ke haircut that looks uglier than Captain Marvel's in *Avengers: Endgame*.
* **Megane Kollard**: French cunt who works for ISIS but secretly leaks their information to Venturian Battle, it seems that the takeaway is that people from France are untrustworthy.

## Venturian Battle Controversies

Robyn and her CGI titties are the main reason the clickbait hacks penned their "articles" about Cultural Marxism as 1001 Spears (who don't know jack about TV anymore) made choices with her and her character that enraged the show's fandom, showing once more that Hirohiko Araki was a fucking intellectual for not including walking porn fodder in the better version of Venturian Battle (that's also an actual anime) JoJo's Bizzare Adventure.

### Robyn Controversy: That Dumb Design

Derp

You should study that misogynistic mound of shit. She has tits for fuck's sake. Anyone who doesn't realize how sexist it is for a woman to have tits should get executed because unless a girl has obese, nauseating Karen tits or flattened ones that aren't there, they should not exist. One more thing about Robyn's design that's insulting to women is that she wears a pink undershirt in the second pic, which is conforming to sexism against wamen (source: Anita Sarkeesian).

An even more sensible petition: this one to remove firearms from a cartoon about militia and terrorists.

This right here is a properly placed campaign, although it would've been infinitely better if they eliminated the show along with the guns.

So 1001 Spears somehow grew something resembling balls and didn't change the design, before sending Persephone up a cup size once she became legal in Season 2.

Cunty MaCunts clearly got triggered since the world somehow wasn't going exactly how they wanted it to but IRL is just IRL.

Seth Rogen made a tweet complaining about Robyn's boobs; this is just one of many examples.

"*1. Viewers were livid that 1001 Spears made Robyn the way she is and made Persephone about as awful with her redesign for this season.*"
- Lolwhat

"*2. I got an animator from Sausage Party to look at their models and he made a TECHNICAL ROAST OF ROBYN AND PERSEPHONE'S BOOBS. Strap your asinine on and let's get to it.*"
- I wonder if roast queer breast tastes like roast chicken breast.

"*3. I'm not here to say that women can't have those proportions (maybe not Robyn's, though), it's way worse than that. The issue with their boobs is the harsh shadows on their cleavage. Any size will look like porn fodder with the shadows.*"
- Fun fact: Persephone Morgana is based on Jennifer Love Hewitt, who is so irrelevant now that only a show ripping off 9/11 could reference her.

"*4. At first he thought it was the materials, drawing the textures to emphasize their shape. It isn't, I've included a pic to show you.*"
- Another fun fact: Robyn Jade took inspiration from a kid who is now a trans man.

"*5. So what the heck is going on? It is the geometry of the model causing the shadows. It does not matter if 1001 does a porny shot, they'll have those extreme shadows.*"
- At this point he's trying just not to sound horny, isn't he?

"*6. No cap, Robyn and Persephone have impossibly deep cleavage, it goes as deep as the heart area. This was a conscious choice by the horndogs who modeled them.*"
- If you look closely you'll notice that Persephone's first shot in season two is traced from Edna's only appearance in Simpsons Movie, down to the giant jugs.

"*7. He softened the normals (lines outside of the geometry, basically) and it was still as yuck. The only solution would be redoing the geometry of their models, which would ruin the animation of the show.*"
- Shit No One Cares About

"*8. 1001 Spears, you have to run future skeletal meshes past the women in your group from now on. Tl;dr this is truly disgusting and impossible to change by now, Robyn and Persephone's hearts are level with and between their tits.*"
- "Two men did this analysis; on that note, were you truly pathetic enough to go to every woman on Sausage Party and Santa Inc. to approve the characters' boobs?" - Rando on Twitter

Meanwhile, at NeoGAF, the liberals are still reeeeeeing and crying over Robyn Jade's tits and Persephone's new ones.

Anyways, with this debate out-of-the-way, it's only a matter of time before SJWs and puritans make a new controversy to abuse a corporation into doing their bidding despite not spending a single penny on what they make.

### Persephone Controversy: A Thespian

Herp

Just before the r/tumblrinaction schmucks could celebrate 1001 Spears trolling the SJW community with Persephone's funny redesign, those losers remembered that Last Thursday they released a Mad Max ripoff where they show that yoga loli is fond of vaginas and hot tight shirt Robyn loves both sausage and pie, as if their gay-ass bobs didn't give it away.

Apparently, Persephone and Robyn are the main (there are more) LGBTQIA+ f\*ggots of the series, as the former has a relationship with Imperator Furiosa while the latter is just going to die alone despite the fact that she looks creepily like Moon Over June's fellow soulless ginger carpet eater who banged every woman possible.

The responses to this change to the Venturian Battle canon vary from the "Bruh, I'm not gonna spend eight hours watching this Twitter knockoff BS", to "You rats, Persephone was my loli, why did you do this to me?" Still, the ones with the most disturbing responses were the libs writing for leftist clickbait pages who busted a nut and shouted: "much diverse, very inclusive, so representation" because a fake girl apparently loves swallowing Belle Delphine juice, you might as well just go back to the whole Legend of Korra thing.

1001 Spears trying to cater to mature viewers with this shoddy publicity stunt will miscarry because, first, there will be more illegal hentai of Persephone fucking the rest of the girls with a strap-on getting made; second, the hardcore weebs won't watch it as they don't want gay pandering while they watch people get the shit murdered out of them and lastly, the show only will get watched by obsessive Twitter users with Wandavision quotes in their profiles, forming around the show a fandom worse than that of Steven Universe. If the Fembusters failure somehow didn't write it on the wall, 1001 must learn that you shouldn't feed the extreme left as they are terrible and faithless buyers who are only interested in virtue signaling, not watching your overdeveloped mistake.

## Venture

**Venture** (better known as *CWCville Fantasy Autism World* or *Shit*) is an overrated online open-world game made of Unreal 4 assets and is the brainchild of the skeletal, autistic Californian egomaniac Brendan, also known as "Trigger." Believe it or not, Venture once hosted a pleasant community that was inevitably seized by screaming 13-year-old new\*\*gs and is now dominated by evil, manipulative speed-runners and people who have no life.

The first version of the game appeared in 2015 as a basic time waster where you make crude structures and dicks with colored materials of differing textures. But like other awesome internet phenomena like Keyboard Cat, Venture monstrous chans and goons learned of it and summoned their influence upon Trigger's ambitious project, which in part made the game more E-famous than it was worth.

Being a game made in Unreal, it wasn't built from the ground up, relies mostly on looks, and is overall hot garbage; in fact, being made in Unreal is the reason you shouldn't try it from the get-go. Most of these issues will get corrected sooner than later, since the weirdly skeleton-framed Trigger now lets his suck-up bitch employees help with the game's design. Lol pranked! Evidently, Venture Guy's harem is more tired and detached from the player-base than Trigger is (however, it's worth noting that there are people in 1001 Spears who hear out community requests regularly, as opposed to just watching hentai during work).

### The Game

The gameplay in Venture consists of hiking for little reason, having your hand injected securely in your colon, and if you found that delightful enough to get to dusk, you later get assaulted by the many monsters of midnight. Although the adventure goes further than that, no matter how "astounding" your Venture life seems it can usually get simmered down to the preceding statement. Whenever they aren't rambling around scanning for that one material they need to make their huge gold cock and ball idol, Venture expects players to grid the fuck out of prospecting, agriculture, lumber work and, in some unfortunate circumstances, even animal killing (PETA), the one thing that keeps the Venture adventure somewhat more diverse and unadulterated than McDonald's "food". Essentially, playing Venture is playing VR Chat but on the PS5 except you can change the world instead of simply making avatars, and the internet is terrible because 1001 Spears.

#### Animals

Venture's beasts are merely a clusterfuck of NPCs that exist to piss you off while you make your home, which in most circumstances is a 6x12 meter pit bored 5 minutes before night into the side of a rock landmass (a minor improvement of Your house IRL).

##### **Herbivores**

* Porcus (Cops) - Flushed fatasses that grunt at you until you murder them for slices of meat. Trigger added the most inefficient feature imaginable; being able to ride the Porcus (bestiality). First, you travel to the bottom of the fucking world to get a saddle (dildo), then you lay it on the Porcus, then you right-click (rape) it. ~~You cannot control the Porcus, and it moves similarly to how it does when you aren't riding it, so its only fucking worth is in satisfying Trigger's morbid furry fantasies.~~ You can control Porcus as of Last Tuesday, but you need a dildo fruit on a twig to try to control (rape) it. Still a fucking waste of dev time. You can also plunge off a cliff with it to make the Porcus An Hero.
* Lac (Lolcow) - Lolcows that love to hop at your face until you milk them or murder them for meat and their skin. Milk in Venture works as a remedy for food poisoning, which Epic Fails because if you fed on raw meat and then drank milk IRL you'd become An Hero.
* Lana: - T~~hese bastards only exist because of their fur's uses.~~ LMAO NOT ANYMORE, you can now eat their meat (Gay). Lana can also eat grass (drugs) to recover their fur. There is little meaning to this feature because you need three furs for a bed in the game and the rest is superfluous.
* Dlab (\*\*\*) - Scary people with large noses and Emoji signs. Dlabs just lie around in their towns and do little more than have gay orgies to make infants (Wat). Different clothing shows each Dlab's role in their community but Nobody Cares about that since most of them act same anyway. The only use for Dlabs is that you can swap your precious J\*w Gold for a wing of Fried Chicken. Tl;dr, the Dlabs in the fan-made "Bourgeois Mod" are At Least 100 times better than the greedy dicks in the unmodded game. The main reason for this is that Bourgeois Dlabs make shit while the default Dlabs go on Aloha Time and charge you cash to do shit for them like the obese, hideous douchebags they are.
* Belemnite (Splatoon) - Pieces of shit with little use that live in the sea. The sole purpose of belemnites is to get ink sacs from them which exist to write erotic fanfics in your journal and that's really it.