He Doesn't Know Time From His Ass

**He Doesn't Know Time From His Ass** was the twelfth chapter of Storm King's Thunder.

## Synopsis

Fandrin and Jonathan escorted Sam Wonse back to the Icy Sickle. Wonse expressed surprise at the fact the party had kidnapped one of the most powerful men in the city, and dismay at the fact that the assassination order Redaro was carrying was encoded. He explained that, if they were lucky, he might be able to get the letter decoded, and that might be enough to break through all the red tape that held back him and his department. This meant that some day he could possibly start a proper investigation into the Steinbeck Trading Company, which could eventually lead to some convictions, eventually, maybe.

Viserra Vallenia then arrived; her scouts having seen José take Redaro to the Icy Sickle, and having seen it being moved. She offered to take Redaro off the party's hands, as well as all of the documents they had gathered, so that she may take down the Steinbecks once and for all. In return, she would secure them safe and instant passage to Waterdeep. The party talked it over, and agreed, providing she also kept Inirvira Coldwater safe. Mildly disappointed, Wonse left. Shortly after, Vallenia took Redaro away, and later sent men to pick up the trunks of documents Jonathan had stolen.

The following day, the party met Vallenia at the agreed meeting point- outside an old rowhouse, which operated as base for a secret organisation known as the Harpers. She brought them inside and through a portal which took them to the City of the Dead in Waterdeep. Thanking them again, she told them to use the portal to go see Krowen Valharrow in Everlund after they were finished their business in Waterdeep. Valharrow was in charge of the Harpers' portal network, and liked to know the people who used it. Vallenia then asked if the party had a name, to which Pretty Boy responded "Pretty Boy and the Pretty Boys", as an attempt at what mortals on the material plane called "jokes". To his dismay, the party voted to adopt this as their official name.

Pretty Boy and the Pretty Boys then travelled through Waterdeep to the estate of Lord Zelraun Roaringhorn, outside the city. Roaringhorn was hosting a party, but abandoned it to talk to the adventurers in his study. The Pretty Boys told Roaringhorn of their travels, and Roaringhorn told them that he had heard a third of the town of Fireshear- the "shield dwarves"- had disappeared about a week ago, shortly after the Pretty Boys had left the town. When asked about Artus Cimber, Roaringhorn revealed he had also been looking for him, but had had no success. After a tense conversation about how the Pretty Boys had learned about the Harpers, Roaringhorn told them what he knew about the giant problem. He had heard that the Ordning- the ancient law stratifying the giant races- had been broken, and that the Storm King was missing. He also knew that the great frost giant adventurer Harshnag was looking into it, and that the party would find him if fate determined it so. He then gave the Pretty Boys some magical items, and said he would possibly look into bringing Bernard back from Hell. He then returned to his party.

After a quick visit to the bank, Pretty Boy and the Pretty Boys returned to the City of the Dead to take the portal to see Krowen Valharrow. Inside Valharrow's building was a library full of tressyms. Haedin took one.

Discussing the giant problem with Valharrow, he speculated that a dragon might be behind the broken Ordning and the missing Storm King, due to the age old animosity between the dragons and the giants. He told the Pretty Boys that there was a red dragon near Mirabar who may be of some help. Pretty Boy then petitioned the archmage to give him a new name. Valharrow called in his assistant, Belinda, who gave him the name Paul. Haedin then advised him to put both of his names together.

Pretty Boy Paul and the Pretty Boys then left Valharrow, having secured the continued use of his portals. They returned to Waterdeep, and set up the Icy Sickle to sleep in for the night.

## NPCs

* Redaro
* Sam Wonse
* Viserra Vallenia
* Thestryl
* Lord Zelraun Roaringhorn
* Krowen Valharrow
* Inirvira Coldwater (mentioned only)
* Harshnag (mentioned only)
* Artus Cimber (mentioned only)
* Bernard (mentioned only)

## Locations

* Neverwinter
* Waterdeep
* Everlund