Operation: Zero Bog Thirty

Operation: Zero Bog Thirty was an attempted operation led by Agent John Kill and the Butt-Ugly Martians, aided by General Erection, to assassinate Emperor Bog. The mission was undertaken in early 2014, and continued for a week until the team was discovered by Martian S.I.X. and forced to retreat from the planet.

## Background

After the Butt-Uglies originally left Mars in the 1950s to visit the solar system, they had hoped Emperor Bog of the Martian Kingdom and President Dingodile of the Martian Commune would keep peace with each other following the Butt-Uglies having divided Mars in two halves controlled by each. Unfortunately, Bog attacked the Commune shortly after, taking over the Martian underground. Upon their return in the 2000s, the Butt-Uglies greatly disdained this act of violence, and did not look back once they were summoned to Earth by Ben-Tucci in 2004. In order to avoid conflict, they agreed to act as informants for Bog, but immediately abandoned this duty once on Earth.

In 2005, Bog sent Infi-Knight to invade and take over the planet Earth, seemingly under the belief that the Butt-Uglies had already established a foothold. The Butt-Uglies decided to act to defend their new home, and followed Mike's lead in combating Martian warlords, eventually confronting and killing Infi-Knight aboard his own flagship. After this, they escaped during the chaos of the International Peacekeeping Force destroying Infi-Knight's flagship, thus avoiding anyone reporting their treachery to Bog.

After these events, the Butt-Uglies and Mike lived civilian lives, enjoying some years of peace under the assumption that Bog would not attack Earth again in fear of being overthrown without his fleet to protect him. Though they were correct that Bog did not directly attack Earth for several years, it eventually became clear that the overlord had no intention to leave Earth in peace. Over the years, it became clear to them that Bog and S.I.X. were funding threats to Earth such as Chitzok, Venusian privateers, the Area 51 raiders, and HADES.

Eventually, backlash from the people of Earth reached the Butt-Uglies when an angry mob attacked and hospitalized Shaboom Shaboom. This event, combined with attempts on their lives from anti-alien actors such as the High Guardians, Seinfeld and Koro Atachi, prompted the group to take action against Bog; in assassinating Bog, the Butt-Uglies hoped to both prove their status as friends of Earth as well as end the tyrant's reign over the Martian people.

## Early Stages

On Christmas of 2013, B-Bop A-Luna decided to hold a Christmas party for themselves and their friends. B-Bop, Do-Wah Diddy, 2T Fru-T, Shaboom Shaboom, Mike, Angela, Cedric, DOG, and Bob met in Mike's oddly large apartment in New York City, and enjoyed a quiet night together in peace. Seinfeld also attended, but due to his size and Mike being occupied with making sure the Christmas tree's star did not combust, the two never actually met during the event. The Fighter was unable to visit, as he was travelling dimensions in search of the dark god Azathoth, but did send a present: a mysterious recipe that only Mike seemed to understand.

### Initial Planning

A few hours later, the visitors left, leaving only Mike and the Butt-Uglies once more. After this, Agent John Kill silently and slowly crawled out a ventilation shaft leading into the living room stealthily, seemingly unaware that the group could see him. After emerging, Kill announced his presence, and also wished his friend B-Bop a Merry Christmas. Afterwards, he accepted a plate of leftover mashed potatoes and began explaining he was here because he deduced that the group was going to attempt to kill Emperor Bog.

B-Bop, forgetting that he told John this a week ago due to food-induced amnesia, commended John's deduction but wondered why he had come. John explained he wished to aid the group, as his job was to protect Earth from all threats to world peace, and offered a means to smuggle them to Mars if the group followed his lead. This caused some friction, as the team would've preferred B-Bop to lead the mission, but they agreed for the moment due to a lack of options.

Over the course of New Year's and early January, the team constructed a rough plan based off their available resources, relying heavily on good execution and improvisation. The hope was to sneak aboard the International Space Elevator, disguise themselves as traders, rely on hacking to find a vessel bound for Mars, and stow away until it reached the planet. Though it was highly risky, it was the only option available to the group, as Mars had recently begun building new cities on recently terraformed regions, causing the fleet to intensely monitor the surface in fear of damage to the delicate ecosystems of the healing surface.

### Initial Execution

On February 1st, put the first stages of the plan into play, and John Kill called in a favor to hitch a ride to Singapore. There, they applied for a public tour of the facility, planning on sneaking away from the group once near a ventilation shaft. All was going well, even as John Kill had to rely on his tech support officer to hack into the Space Elevator in order to falsify ID for the Martians, and the five suddenly left the large tour group and searched for a ventilation shaft.

Unfortunately, it seemed all the shafts were secured with alarms, seemingly in reaction to damages dealt by HADES infiltrators two years ago, and the group searched for over an hour until finally finding an unlocked shaft. The group prepared to infiltrate, until a flashlight suddenly shined in their eyes as they crawled into the shaft. Initially thinking they were spotted by a security camera, the group was shocked when they realized they were being confronted by a human. After adjusting his eyes, John Kill recognized their ambusher: none other than General Erection himself, Supreme Commander of the International Peacekeeping Force.

Mike prepared to talk about Death Grips in self-defense, but Agent Kill stopped him with a taser in order to understand the General. Erection explained that the IPF's Division had pieced together the group's plan through surveillance, and had decided to intervene in order to stop it. B-Bop told the General that the group had already completed their plans and were fully ready to kill Bog, but Erection interrupted to tell him that the Division already simulated the groups plan, and every result ended with the team being discovered by S.I.X. and captured or killed.

After the conversation, General Erection and IPF security escorted the group to a hidden room used by the Division in order to present the simulations, going on for forty minutes until B-Bop acknowledged the plan's faultiness. John Kill prepared to leave to think of a new plan, until General Erection stopped him and offered to help the group with IPF resources. B-Bop and Kill thought for a moment, before accepting the deal in order to stand a better chance at taking out Bog.

### New Plans

For several days, John Kill, B-Bop, and members of the Division's Strategic Operations Group consulted on the best course of action, modeling several scenarios. Ultimately, the plan finally agreed upon relied on the group infiltrating Bog's palace on Third Olympus, the first fully completed and inhabited surface city on Mars, protected from the desolate atmosphere outside by several warships and a large atmospheric bubble. The Martians would go under the guise of reporting to Bog, using their chance at an audience with the Emperor to assassinate him. Mike, John Kill, and an IPF agent going with the group would disguise themselves as alien mercenaries escorting the Martians. In order to safely reach the planet, the Martians would approach in an adrift Martian corvette that had been captured by Venusian salvagers and sold to the IPF. The ship would be able to present a friendly signature for the duration of their approach, thus allowing the Martians to penetrate a deep as possible into Mars's defensive perimeter before announcing their arrival. The hope was that by delaying Bog's realization they were coming to the planet to the last minute, Bog would not have time to consider the possibility of the Butt-Uglies having betrayed him.

## The Operation

On February 8th, the Bog Assassination Team departed from the IPF's secret shipyard on the moon in their newly repaired Martian corvette. The approach did not used the ship's warp drive in order to minimize visibility, and the trip from the Moon to Mars's general area took 128 hours from start to finish. As the corvette was small and fast, it was difficult to detect by Martian patrols, but the gaps between these defensive fleets began to close more and more as time went on. On one occasion, the corvette was nearly detected by a Martian trade vessel passing by, on only remained unseen by deactivating most of its systems so it appeared to be nothing more than space junk.

By February 14th, the ship was in hailing distance of Mars, reaching the end of the first phase of the plan. The group considered approaching Mars slowly with most electronics disabled, so as to appear as an asteroid not worth considering, but ultimately decided against this as it would both be extremely suspicious once the ship hailed Mars, and it was known to B-Bop A-Luna that the Martian Navy occasionally used asteroids as target practice. Their course of action decided, B-Bop sent a message to Mars in a frequency he memorized many years ago.

Though B-Bop's hailing frequency was outdated, it was still monitored by S.I.X., who responded to the hail a few minutes later. B-Bop explained the situation to the intelligence officers, who appeared somewhat suspicious but ultimately interested in what the Martian had to say. The chief officer considered ordering the ship to be detained, until Emperor Bog himself intervened and ordered that the Butt-Uglies be welcomed to Third Olympus peacefully. It seemed evident that Bog still believed the trio were not only still loyal to him, but still considered Bog a friend. This caused Do-Wah Diddy to become slightly guilty, as it seemed to him that they were betraying a friend, but he ultimately decided to remain true to the mission.

### Arriving on Mars

A few hours after the conversation, the corvette landed on the Third Olympus spaceport without event. Emperor Bog, Electrocutioner, and Dr. Damage met the Martians and their disguised escorts at the landing site, where Bog welcomed his old friends happily. Electrocutioner stoically observed the group, while Damage cast suspicion on the three masked escorts, which Bog had seemingly not noticed. This did cause Bog to observe the agents, especially Mike, but B-Bop assured Bog that the mercenaries simply were there as protection and required their masks to survive in the Martian atmosphere. The group of six were escorted to a private room in Bog's palace, where 2T Fru-T used his hacking skills to check for surveillance equipment which, remarkably, was not present in the room. John Kill took off his mask to breathe easier, and began discussing the group's next move. 2T managed to look into the schedule for Bog's day, which included various diplomatic events and personal duties. Two opportunities presented themselves: attacking Bog while he was giving a speech to ambassadors from Mercury, Titan, and Neptune, or sneaking into Bog's quarters while he was sleeping. Both were highly risky, and the group took over an hour discussing their options. Ultimately, John Kill convinced the team that sneaking into Bog's room presented the best option, as the other could result in the team being overwhelmed by reinforcements. Another risk with the first option was collateral damage of ambassadors, which could result in retaliation against Earth from other planets.

Just as the group decided to relax, Mike realized that the door to their room was being opened, and quickly jumped across the table to put John Kill's mask on. The door slid open, revealing none other than Dr. Damage with a tray of food. Damage looked across the room, seemingly looking for something, before greeting the group and informing them that Bog would have to wait to meet them until tomorrow. B-Bop thanked Damage for the hospitality and food, before the Martian agent left once more. Though nervous from the close call, the group took the chance to relax and eat the food before them. Within a few minutes, the Kraft Dinner, Baked Beans, Venusian Ale, and Black Beans had been devoured by the group.

### Execution

Later on in the night, 24:12 local time, the group silently climbed out of the window to their room, and carefully crept through Third Olympus heading to Bog's lair. Though the trek was only a couple blocks, it took hours as the group took extreme precautions to avoid any chance of being spotted. By 04:20, the group had reached the outside of Bog's personal manor, and used grappling guns to ascend to a window of an empty room in the palace. After a long climb, during which Mike nearly fell due to being distracted by a Martian butterfly, the group emerged into the empty room, seemingly some sort of trophy room.

After scanning the hallway that led to the inner palace and finding no patrols, the group exited and began heading though the building to the inner lair. As the team opened an elevator that led to Bog's sanctum, they were taken aback when none other than Dr. Damage was waiting for them inside. John Kill prepared to attack, before Damage held his hands up to show he wasn't a threat. B-Bop attempted to explain that they had urgent news for Bog alone, before Damage interrupted him and explained he was fully aware of their plan to kill Bog.

Before anyone could deny the accusation, Damage presented all his evidence:

1. The Butt-Uglies had been dark for approximately a decade, even when Infi-Knight had established a short-lived dominance over Earth.
2. Despite being able to hire alien mercenaries to act as their body guards, the Butt-Uglies had made no attempts to reach Mars or any of its allies with the seeming freedom.
3. The "alien" bodyguards actually were able to survive on Mars, as Damage was able to see that despite their masks, John Kill did not have his suit fully sealed when he visited the group.
4. In addition, Damage made sure the group ate all the food he presented them with after they left. Not only did this again prove that the bodyguards most likely removed their masks, he made sure that the black beans were also eaten. Damage noted that black beans were toxic to all known sentient races except humans.
5. The group had managed to reach this far into the palace, even though they would be unable to have the newly-implemented Martian ID cards required to bypass the entrance's security.

B-Bop was unable to come up with a response, and prepared to attack alongside John Kill. Damage explained that he had no intention to stop them, as he also wanted Bog killed, throwing off the group. Mike said that Damage was kinda cringe, so he shouldn't have reason to kill Bog. Damage then informed the group that his reasons were purely self-motivated: Damage wanted to Bog dead so he could start a civil war and emerge as the new leader of the Martian people.

Despite Damage's offer being beneficial to the group, as Damage might be able to provide favors as the new Emperor, they ultimately decided against allying with him. Though they wanted Bog dead, this was meant to be a message from Earth to Mars and an attempt to end his tyranny, as opposed to an attempt to cause a civil war that could result in the destruction of Martian society. Damage sighed but chose to let the group proceed, giving them his ID card to reach Bog's room.

The team proceeded up the elevator, which took several minutes to ascend, before reaching the highly extravagant door to Bog's bedroom. 2T Fru-T used the card to open the door, causing John Kill, Mike, the IPF agent, and B-Bop to burst through the door and fire on Bog sleeping in his bed. A few seconds later, the team stopped shooting and waited for the smoke to clear, in order for John Kill to photograph Bog's body for evidence for Erection.

However, when the smoke cleared, there was only Bog's bed ripped apart by gunfire. Suddenly, the city outside began blaring alarms and Bog appeared as a hologram. He seemed disappointed and angry, and informed the group that he was disappointed that the trio he thought of as his friends had betrayed him. B-Bop questioned how he managed to avoid assassination, before informing the Martians that Dr. Damage had hidden Bog away in order to capture the Butt-Uglies in a sting operation.

Suddenly, the building began echoing with the incoming footsteps of S.I.X. special forces, causing John Kill to detonate the wall nearest to the group to provide an escape route. Though they were four stories in the air, their suits came equipped with low-power jetpacks that could cushion their fall. The six jumped into the streets as the Martian forces burst through the elevator, firing rapidly at them and injuring Mike and the IPF Agent.

### Escape

Within minutes, the streets of Third Olympus were filled with the sounds of Martian hovercraft searching for the group, who were now in a frenzy to reach their ship and escape. The team sprinted through Third Olympus, occasionally trading fire with Martian forces as they hurried to the spaceport. Bursting into the hangar that housed their corvette, the team engaged in a short firefight with a Martian team that were preparing to impound the ship. It seemed the group would be able to escape, until Electrocutioner burst through the ceiling, using his powers to drain power from the ship.

Facing no other option, Mike prepared to kill himself to initiate a BKM in hopes that it might give the Butt-Uglies a chance to defeat the opponent. However, the IPF Agent stopped him, and nodded to B-Bop silently. B-Bop nodded back, and ordered the rest of the team to get into the ship, while the Agent pulled out a combat knife and jumped up to Electrocutioner to challenge him. Though he stood no chance, the IPF Agent managed to distract Electrocutioner long enough for 2T Fru-T to power up the ship and fly out of the city's entrance.

Immediately, the corvette detected dozens of Martian ships coming to intercept them, charging up their long-range railguns in order to shoot down the craft. Facing no other option, 2T Fru-T activated the ships low-power warp drive to escape the situation, causing the corvette to warp far away from Mars. Thirty minutes later, the warp drive deactivated, and the Martians found themselves somewhere on the Earth-facing side of the Asteroid Belt. Detecting no threats, 2T turned on the autopilot to reach Earth

## Aftermath

Two days later, the craft finally reached Earth, where they were escorted into the Moon's shipyard. Though Erection first seemed optimistic, he immediately realized something had gone wrong based on the team's body language alone. Once he realized they were missing a member, the Supreme Commander was able to piece things together before B-Bop said anything. After a long debrief, the group was escorted back to the Space Elevator and returned to Earth. The operation was a failure, and General Erection returned to Japan in order to prepare a report on the mission for the UN Security Council.

Though Bog's life was saved, the reality that the Butt-Uglies had betrayed him and allied with Earth deeply affected him. Emperor Bog became much more paranoid than ever before, and began escalating his preparations for a future war with Earth. In particular, Bog became obsessed with rumors of an ancient homeworld of the Martians, said to be in a distant star system whose location was lost millennia ago.

Though the operation was a failure, Erection still saw potential in the Mike's group and prepared a draft for a similar team if another situation ever arose. Agent John Kill was particularly affected by the failure of the mission, viewing it as at his fault for blowing the group's cover. John became intensely devoted to his work as Echelon One, leading to him undertaking an extremely dangerous mission in Venezuela later in the year that led to his death.