5GFest

## Overview

5GFest was the celebration of a full rollout of 5G (5 Good) communication service to Wuhu Island sponsored by 5 Gum. The festival was attended by many high-ranking officials and military personnel, such as Lois Griffin, Dr. Doofenshmirtz, Colonel Wiggleston, and Australian Devil, and Stretched Cow. The festival featured a tank parade commanded by the Wuhu Army Special Forces and a artillery show by the Wuhu Royal Artillery.

## History

5G technology was invented by top researchers at the Wuhu Democratic People's Big Think, who directed construction of a good amount of 5G towers. 5G technology would allow the citizens of Wuhu to beam memes and funny haha lol moments directly into each other's brains. As this technology would be the greatest technological achievement in Wuhu history, a festival would be planned on the day of its introduction to the people. 5G technology was a complex system controlled entirely from the central headquarters at the Royal Artillery Center Summerstone, codenamed DOUGCAMP1.

## Operation

Vladimir Putin was selected by the People's Joint Committee For Getting Things Done to be the Senior 5G Officer of the People's Democratic Ultra-Reliable Source of News and Information and Comedy. Putin oversaw the operation of the towers and operated them accordingly. The technology was mainly used to coordinate secret military intelligence and epic Minecraft letsplays, although civilian usage was its second priority. Civilian usage included, but was not limited to, communication, memery, music, and direct wireless injection of good vibes.

## The Festival

The festival began when Putin turned on the network. During the festival, DJ V.C. transmitted music and ~~propaganda~~ good vibes to the attendees of

5GFest. DJ V.C. also handled merchandise sales, which exceeded 4.8 quadrillion units. Many games were hosted, such as the promotional 5G Rings event, in which the last man to continue holding on would win a free 5G tower. A special appearance of the Wuhu Special Forces Tank Division (The Wigglemen) was also displayed. Mao Zhedong himself attended virtually on a 5G-powered EZ-Set(tm) ~~propaganda~~ screen. His performance included his new VTuber model, which depicted himself in his classic and refined catgirl aesthetic. Special Uberkommander Dehydrated Lois also gave a speech on the importance of washing your hands in the wake of dry-hand related deaths. FInally, there was an appearance by Zhao Xina singing about his love for locally-produced ice cream and Lao Gan Ma chili sauce.

## The SR-16 Incident

===================CLEARANCE LEVEL ALPHA-HOMUNCULUS REQUIRED========================================

Wuhu's most technologically advanced fighter jet, the SR-16 Night Knight, was planned to perform a flyover from the deck of the RWS Soandso, reaching Wuhu Square during Mao Zhedong's high note in "Red Sun in the Sky". The SR-16's Ultra-Refined Obamium Power Core was not #5GReady and went ubercritical as it entered 5G-infested airspace above Wuhu Island. The SR-16 got caught on the 5G tower above the Wuhu People's Royal Ministry of Healthy Living and began to spew non-Newtonian liquid Obamium chunks over Wuhu Square, leading to a large plume of smoke as the Obamium ingested the courtyard's bricks. During the explosions, Mao Zhedong attempted to calm the people with his "Red Sun in the Sky" performance, which was met with a 130,000/10 by Rotten Tomatoes, which effectively calmed the Wuhu populus. Survivors were then taken to Hotel Trivago and were quarantined until they agreed to take a bath in a pool filled with Pepto-Bismol.

## Theft

From the explosion, a group of moon tweakers low on supplies and looking for their next fix of corn detected the 5G waves and arrived at Wuhu Square. Overnight all 5G towers on Wuhu Island were picked up by large magnets and stripped of their copper and Obamium. All parts were later sold to the Intergalactic Pawn n' Loan over Alpha Centauri. In the process of ripping the towers up with magnets, the moon tweakers laser-cleaned the island and rid it of Obamium poisoning due to the fact it was "really not a vibe", according to Bob Simmons, leader of the moon tweakers.

## Current Status

* 5G is no longer in existence after its theft by the moon tweakers.
* 5G is not dangerous to your health.
* 5G is completely healthy and has no side effects whatsoever.
* Swimming in a pool filled with Pepto-Bismol has not been approved as a cure by the FDA. We just wanted to humiliate them.