The Musso & Frank Grill with Evan Susser

"The Musso & Frank Grill with Evan Susser" is Episode 427 of *Doughboys*, hosted by Nick Wiger and Mike Mitchell. "The Musso & Frank Grill with Evan Susser" was released on December 14, 2023.

## Synopsis

Commissioner Evan Susser (*Killing It*, *Fist Fight*, *Brooklyn Nine-Nine*) joins the 'boys to air some grievances about the podcast before a review of Musso & Frank Grill in the eighth annual steak-and-a-shake year-end tradition. Plus, a chilly Drank or Stank.

## Nick's intro

“*He weighed 119 pounds — and 19 of those pounds were cock.*”

Countless versions of this quote have been documented, said by screen legend Ava Gardner in reference to her third husband: the anatomically blessed Frank Sinatra.

Born in 1915 in Hoboken, New Jersey with effectively two umbilical cords, by the 1930s, Sinatra was regularly delighting nightclub crowds with his massive hog. During World War II, this diminutive pipe swinger whipped his built-in jump rope to the top of the charts, as screaming bobby-soxer women and hooting USO troops turned out by the thousands to get a glimpse of his jaw-dropping and throat-widening donger. Nicknamed the Chairman of the Board, Old Blue Eyes, and the Cervix Destroyer, in the late 1940s, Sinatra teamed up with fellow hogsmen Dean Martin, Sammy Davis Jr., Peter Lawford, and Joey Bishop to form the original supergroup, The Rat Pack, named for the front-facing rat tails packed by these huge-dicked circus freaks. These five fuck machines collaborated on tours, Vegas revues, and films, including the original *Ocean’s 11*, a film based on the length of Sinatra’s hog.

And it’s during the heyday of the Rat Pack that you’d find Sinatra at the oldest restaurant in Hollywood, handlessly touching the water in the men’s room toilet. Sinatra was one of countless show-biz regulars who frequented the legendary steakhouse, where he’d hold court for hours, regaling celebrities like Marlon Brando and Orson Welles with glimpses of his big hog.

Unfortunately for Sinatra, his peak in the '40s and '50s gave way to the '60s and '70s, when rock and roll introduced audiences to edgier, more innovative hogs. By the glam era of the 1980s, Americans were more interested in frizzy pubes than giant peens. But then, in 1993, just a few years before his death, Sinatra released his comeback hit entitled *Duets*, which explored a new aspect of his hog: his balls. It proved a fitting capstone for his ability to evolve as a meat marvel for six underwear-stretching decades.

Sinatra died in 1998 at the age of 82, and his remains were preserved in two urns: one for his body, and one for his big hog. But still today, 25 years after his death, this legendary Italian-American is fondly remembered for his staggering power tool that had the length and circumference of a tennis-ball can. He also apparently was a singer.

And also still today, if you hit up Frank’s favorite Los Angeles steakhouse, you can sit in the Sinatra booth, where his prize hog once rested coiled on the cushions like a just-fed cobra.

This week, on the final new *Doughboys* of 2023… we return to Steak ‘n Shake, via the oldest restaurant in Hollywood: Musso & Frank.

## Fork rating

As The Doughboys normally do for the end of the year, Nick, Mitch, and Susser go somewhere and get 'steaks and shakes'. This year, they went to the old-school Hollywood steakhouse, The Musso & Frank Grill.

* Caesar Salad
* Ribeye Cap Steak
 Mike Mitchell
* Daiquiri
* Dinner Salad
* Ribeye Steak
 Evan Susser
* Caesar Salad
* Bone-In Ribeye Steak
 shared
* Musso & Frank Sauce
* Green Peppercorn Sauce
* Fresh Asparagus with Hollandaise Sauce
* Mashed Potatoes
* Lyonnaise Potatoes
* 1919 Sundae
* Flannel Cakes, with Whipped Cream and Strawberries

With these scores, The Musso & Frank Grill makes the Platinum Plate Club.

## Drank or Stank: Shake or Ache edition

In Drank or Stank, The Doughboys have a drink and decide if it is 'good' or 'bad.'

To complete the second half of their 'steak and shake' episodes, they have the *Trolls Band Together*-themed shakes from Shake Shack. The *Trolls* shakes are Poppy's Sugar Cookie Shake, Viva's Cinnamon Roll Shake, and Branch's Chocolate Peppermint Shake. They also had a Vanilla Shake and a Chocolate Shake.

 Mike Mitchell
 Evan Susser

## "Okay" by Amelia Marino

And so a rest from podcast burden
My friends all make it clear
There are complaints I've been observin'
You've talked a lot of cum
Devoured each and every entree
Left people bored, more bored than this
'Cause it was okay

Regrets, you've had a lot
But now a lot I'm going to mention
Let's start with a guest named Lowe
Or Kowalick or Ep 400
You ate at lousy chains
Like Taco John's or Shaq's or Subway
You gorged, you gorged on chips
And it was okay

Yes, there were times I sure you knew
When you bit more than you could chew
But through it all, there was no doubt
You ate it up and should've spit it out
Then shit it all in that bathroom stall
And it felt okay

For what are two men with a dumb pod
Eating themselves closer to God
To say the things they truly feel
About endless crabby meals
The record shows this podcast blows
And that is okay!*

## Susser's Favorite Clips

Susser also brings some clips from past shows to remind The Doughboys how fun the show is.

* First, he plays Nick's theme to the Sauceton Powers segment from this episode.
* Next, a clip of Mitch singing his epic theme for "My Snackrifice" from this episode.
* Also somehow Susser and Emma bring clips from the lost 400th episode. Nobody's sure how that happened.
* Lastly, the clip of The Noid's stirringly patriotic version of "The Star-Spangled Bowler" that kicked off BOWL: Finale.

## Year-End Bonus Beatriz

In the HomeState episode earlier in 2023, Mitch and Stephanie Beatriz discuss the show they were in together (*Twisted Metal*). At the time, The Doughboys had to cut out any of the conversation about the show because of the WGA and SAG strikes.

Now the strike is over, they included a 20-minute bonus clip of Nick and Mitch discussing *Twisted Metal* with Beatriz.

## Quotes

**Evan**: I don't know if you can listen to pods on Death Row. How would you? You can't have a phone.
**Mitch**: Do you think we have any listeners on Death Row, the music label?

## The Feedbag

 Mike Mitchell
* move no-Nut November to August
 Evan Susser
 Emma Erdbrink

## Drops and Plugs

 * *Killing It*
* Villain-Con Minion Blast
* *Bosh*

## Related Episodes

* 82. Steak 'n Shake 3
* 233. Steak 'n Shake 4
* 281. Steak 'n Shake 5
* 330. Monty's Good Burger
* 379. Shake Shack 3
* 427. The Musso & Frank Grill
* 45. Burger Brawl: Semi-Soft Finals Round 2
* 46. Burger Brawl: Finals
* 111. Shake Shack
* 314. Shake Shack 2
* SP4. Snack Pack
* 379. Shake Shack 3
* 427. **The Musso & Frank Grill**
* 63. 7-Eleven
* 100. Nugget Power Hour
* DD. It's A Wigerful Life
* DD. Wige Hard
* DD. Tonight, We Dine In Hell
* DD. Gorko's Planet Clergmas Spectacular
* 391. BOWL: Finale / 427. The Musso & Frank Grill
* 427. The Musso & Frank Grill

## Photos

Whiskey Sour and Hendrick's Gin MartiniShrimp CocktailLyonnaise Potatoes, Fresh Asparagus with Hollandaise Sauce, Mashed PotatoesCaesar Salad, Dinner SaladRibeye Cap Steak, Ribeye Steak, Bone-In Ribeye Steak1919 Sundae, Funnel Cakes with Whipped Creams and BerriesHarrison Ford's Walk-of-Fame Star