Expedition 166: The Banishing of the Tarrasque

Date: 26th of Monova

Roster: Confidence, Kel’Soveen, Parsnip, Valorie Vayer, Yezra, with help from Rosemary and the three Githzerai Zerths.

Inigo of Capitol

Tempus Through the Ages

Professor Es’Sabir Eeks

Bahamon 13th, 654 AoP

### Pushing the Tarrasque Somewhere Else

#### Analysis of “The Banishing the Tarrasque”

A Tarrasque is a common image in modern Tempus iconography and material religion. Both high and low art of Tempus has featured the Stormlord fighting, hunting, riding, or, in the famous satire, playing fetch with a Tarrasque using a meteor. Tempus is so ubiquitously depicted with his Tarrasque today that it is often a surprise to students of Tempestuous religion that the Stormlord’s sometime foe, sometime companion is a comparatively recent addition to his domain. Though Tempus is mentioned, along with several other gods, as a creator and binder of the Tarrasques, it was not until the late 4th century of the Age of Pain that the Tarrasque was given special prominence as Tempus’s enemy or pet.

More interestingly, Tempus’s Tarrasque appears to have entered the religious imagination due to one particular story that crossed all four continents in the mid-4th century AoP. “The Banishing of the Tarrasque” is the common current name given to this tale, which was transcribed several times, under different titles with sometimes significant variations, beginning in roughly the 470s AoP. Recent works by Eeks and Ag Ghanim show that the rise of Tarrasque iconography in Tempus churches and monuments follows, rather than predates, the spread of “The Banishing of the Tarrasque,” calling into doubt earlier scholarship describing the story as an explanation concocted for an already developing trend.

This causal relationship is, on its own, fascinating. However, it is even more unusual because of the satirical nature of “The Banishing of the Tarrasque.” Though many modern scholars of Tempus religion, including Eeks herself, have read “The Banishing” as an earnest praise-story of a heroic deed, this analysis is ultimately specious. The author of “The Banishing” certainly mimics the style of the great Tempestuous Epics: they describe a powerful enemy (in this case, the Tarrasque) that blasphemes against Tempus, and then describe and praise a hero or heroes who seek, battle, and defeat that enemy, ending with a final description of the fate of the nemesis’ remains. However, this stylistic allusion is merely the framework for the unknown author’s frankly biting satire of the themes of a traditional Tempestuous Epic. Tempestuous Epics give praise to powerful heroes for courageously confronting seemingly impossible odds, showing how, when people fail to strive against adversity, folk lose both physical safety and moral clarity. “The Banishing of the Tarrasque” completely inverts this ethic, using tone and irony to give praise to heroes for conspicuously avoiding the trials Tempus sets before them.

“The Banishing of the Tarrasque” begins without giving away its intentions. Ag Ghanim translates the first line: “On the 25th of Monova the Tarrasque was woken by the annihilator Xovreme and set itself against the planes.” In the same style as “The Turtlethrash” or “The Krakenseige,” the author of “The Banishing” establishes the antagonist of the story as its primary motivator, in some ways the main character. The story centers around what the Tarrasque attempts to do and how it is stopped. The Tarrasque blasphemes against Tempus like a traditional Epic antagonist: “Until nightfall on the 25th, the Tarrasque gathered a Mote of Undoing from where Tempus had returned to the Celestial Plane, as Xovreme gathered a Mote from where Oluceps had ascended alongside him.” The Tarrasque gathers Tempus’ own power to destroy his creation, attempting to usurp His role in the cosmic order as the bringer of disasters. However, the author also frames the monster as a moral challenge to the people of the world: The Tarrasque “dug under the walls of Highhall as it lay under threat, such that the army sitting in its defense would have no recourse to a siege.” The Tarrasque, while burrowing towards a Gate to the Elemental Plane of Earth to destabilize the planes, conveniently undermines the walls of the city of Highhall, as the city was tensely negotiating with an army of Xovreme’s servants who wanted to conquer it. The Tarrasque tears away the city’s defenses, forcing the citizens to choose between accepting Xovreme’s ultimatum to surrender the city or fighting boldly to keep their home, showing them that only inner courage and strength can truly guard their safety and freedom. In style, material, and morals, then, the opening pages of “The Banishing of the Tarrasque” clearly follows the formula of a traditional Tempus Epic. Only one aside in the first pages shows the parody to come: “Because Xovreme and the Tarrasque together would have been too mighty to face, their enemies planned to strike them when they separated on the 26th of Monova.” This is, obviously, the sort of thinking Tempus does not like in his champions; yet no moral judgment follows this line.

By the standard route of an Epic, once the threat has been introduced, the author will introduce the story’s heroes, and the author of “The Banishing” does just this. As the Tarrasque looms closer to the Gate of Earth and the shattering of the planes, the story goes back in time to introduce the Tarrasque’s Banisher, the wizard-conjurer Rosemary. Rosemary is an unusual Tempestuous hero but not (on his own) an obvious parody: he is “a conjurer without peer,” who “said without fear that the Tarrasque would fall by his arts,” “braggadocious and dauntless despite standing shorter than a halfling’s shin.” All of these traits are valued, or at least tolerated, in the Epics. Despite being a wizard, Rosemary would seem to fit the mold of the Tempestuous hero, except for the oddity of his introduction.

There is no standard method for introducing the heroes of a Tempestuous narrative, but the Epics typically highlight the hero’s strength, their dedication to becoming stronger as a moral virtue, and possibly their piety, nautical or survival skills, and outlander origins. Rosemary is introduced as “a prisoner of the God-King of Shra’kt’lor, the Mengyar Ag, whom Rosemary had attempted to conjure and bind but who had instead bound and imprisoned Rosemary inside a tower in his Adamant City.” This is a quite awkward condition for a Tempestuous hero to find himself in at the start of his adventure. But Rosemary “received word of the Tarrasque by the sendings of the Great Traveler Kel’Soveen, and swore to aid against it in exchange for freedom.” The picture appears to come together: Rosemary is the ace of the story, but he will be joined by other heroes as he leads the charge against the Tarrasque. This would be an unusual but thematically sound Epic, and a reader expecting such an epic will now settle in to see Rosemary’s soon-to-be-sidekicks kick down his cell door and spirit him back to the Material Plane.

It is here that the parody begins in earnest. On the 23rd Monova, five heroes of the Ironwood Compact do arrive to free Rosemary: the Many-Faced Trickster Confidence, the Sower of Sun Parsnip, the Great Traveler Kel’Soveen, the Unquenchable Flame Ranag Uln, and the Versed Bard Valorie Vayer. These same five join Rosemary to defeat the Tarrasque, except for Ranag Uln, who will be replaced by the Stormfriend, Yezra Vaxilondrav; the two’s roles in the story are so similar that some later retellings omit Ranag Uln entirely and substitute in Yezra from the beginning. These five heroes, lead by Valorie and Kel’Soveen, “entered the city walking between planes with powerful magic, prepared to free Rosemary by guile and force.” All is set on the course a Tempus Epic expects; the heroes have been introduced, and after a brief introductory exploit will be set to encounter the Tarrasque. Then, “after discussing with the Mengyar, Valorie persuaded Him of the necessity of stopping the collapse of the planes, and after placing into His care her creation, the Giant Valenyesh, and Ranag Uln’s weapon Mool’caz, The Axe of Endings, the Mengyar released Rosemary to her keeping. Parsnip spoke against this, but Valorie held that they must husband strength for Xovreme, and this logic was accepted.”

This is almost exactly the opposite of how heroes of a traditional Tempestuous Epic are expected to act. Rather than improving themselves by facing their opposition head-on, the heroes of this “epic” instead treat with the Mengyar, and talk him into allowing Rosemary to leave due to the direness of the situation. The only member of the group who opposes this, Parsnip, is outvoted by his more powerful and senior teammates. This is the set-up for the central deconstruction of this parody. While a traditional Tempus Epic shows how great disasters strengthen the ethics and willpower of folk, “The Banishing of the Tarrasque” shows the Tarrasque instead encouraging, even making a virtue out of, evading and redirecting responsibility. “The Banishing” also demonstrates how the presence of strong, capable heroes like those Tempus lauds destroy the conditions to create such heroes. So long as it is safer for those threatened with disaster to pass off dangers and challenges to mighty heroes, they will do so—instead of facing the struggles to sculpt themselves into worthy heroes instead. “The Banishing of the Tarrasque” is a praise-story about heroes who buck the Call to Adventure as hard as they possibly can.

Indeed, foisting off difficult parts of the main quest drives much of the action of the Epic. After concluding the aside into Limbo where Rosemary is introduced, “The Banishing of the Tarrasque” moves through a planning interlude, notably longer than that of other comparable epics. Rosemary promises to banish the Tarrasque, if his rescuers can safely get him close to it. Ranag Uln immediately sees the catch:

> Ranag asked “You will send it to Shra’kt’lor to savage the Mengyar?”
> "... Okay, I see your point, but picture the look on Mengyar Ag’s stupid face!” Rosemary rejoined.
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The party refuses to send the Tarrasque to Limbo and endanger lives there, and instead fall to debating, at great length, where else it could be contained. Rosemary offers his summoning sanctum in the Astral Plane as a reasonable prison, “and all agreed to clear the Black Sun Sanctum as soon as reasonable, and the matter dropped for a time.” But then, when Rosemary learns about the Mote of Undoing the Tarrasque gathered, “Rosemary quickly deduced that his sanctum would not hold the Tarrasque, and advised against banishing it there.” Then another long round of debate was held to pick another destination. The discussion grows acrimonious and bitter, and all become frustrated at the apparent impossibility of the situation. This is a trope those familiar with earlier Tempus Epics will again recognize: the stress of an impossible enemy causes authorities, sometimes the heroes of the story themselves, to fall to squabbling and despair as they struggle to imagine a way out of their situation. Then, the character of the story who most reflects Tempus’ teachings gives a speech or otherwise rallies the brave to face their enemy head-on, spurning guile and relying on strength and courage. This, Tempestuous faith holds, is a practical and moral necessity when facing impossible odds. Again, however, “The Banishing of the Tarrasque” turns this trope on its ear. It is not a paragon of Tempus, but Kel’Soveen the Great Traveler who quiets the argument: “Kel’Soveen then spoke again, and once again held forth that the heroes should call upon the Gods to give Rosemary a key to a plane where the Tarrasque could be safely contained.” Ranag Uln and Valorie Vayer vehemently disagree, holding that this would cause planar instability and do Xovreme’s will for him. But Kel’Soveen points out that no other plan proposed could defeat the Tarrasque without causing grievous loss of life; and waiting merely made the problem worse. Thus, accepting some harm to the planes is preferable to any other option available. Convinced by his logic and eloquence, Valorie and Ranag agree to Kel’Soveen’s plan and he is roundly praised for his idea—even though it is quite literally asking for a Deus Ex Machina to save the heroes. Moreover, nobody brings up the possibility of a straight-on fight with the Tarrasque, even though that option, after the failure of the Black Sun, is the only way to completely stop it from damaging the planes. Trusting in powerful allies, Rosemary and the Gods, is a much more certain way to defeat the Tarrasque than trusting themselves, and so the heroes never force themselves to find the courage for an impossible battle.

This protracted planning interlude also deconstructs another trope of Tempus Epics: Rosemary, the nominal main hero of the epic, who actually banishes the Tarrasque, is treated as neither a moral nor temporal authority by the Ironwood Compact heroes. Rosemary speaks extensively during the planning interlude, but he never has the final say on anything. His preferred choice, of banishing the Tarrasque to Shra’kt’lor, is found out and dismissed by his hyper-paranoid rescuers, and Rosemary is, in fact, put under continuous watch by Gith’zerai Zerths so he does not attempt to escape. Rosemary’s trials are not treated as a moral failing on the Compact’s part; indeed, their precautions are delivered matter-of-factly, as if Rosemary were merely a side character, whose treatment is less important than his narrative function. This is because, again in satire of the Tempus Epic formula, Rosemary is not the main character of “The Banishing of the Tarrasque.” The Compact’s plans, decisions, and deeds drive the action of the story forward, even though they try to offload as much work as possible onto others in their quest. Rosemary is the one who banishes the Tarrasque; but he banishes the Tarrasque in fulfillment of the Compact’s plan, and he highlights the Compact’s “moral development” by doing so, not his own.

The planning interlude finally concludes with one last-minute change: Valorie Vayer, “who had grown so skilled at elocution that her words could persuade the world,” has a brilliant idea on how to avoid calling on the Gods to directly provide a planar key to a safe realm: she can use her most powerful magic to go to a Divine Realm, and retrieve a planar key directly from the Gods without them needing to destabilize the planes by sending the key from Heaven down to Tark. To verify that this now incredibly circuitous scheme will work, Valorie seeks out a diviner, and selects Yezra Stormborn Vaxilondrav, Cleric of Tempus (and possibly Valorie’s lover), who consults with Tempus himself and informs Valorie that she can retrieve a key that fits her needs from Tempus’ Realm. This is how a Cleric of Tempus and Tempus himself get involved directly in the “epic”: both as a near-afterthought appended to an incredibly complex plan for a minor efficiency improvement, and as an inevitable consequence of the mindset of the Compact. If one is trying to offload an impossible task on stronger backs, one will eventually look to Tempus, the strongest God. Thus, the parody continues to its logical conclusion, and the Ironwood Compact tries to get Tempus himself to solve their problems so they need not face an apparently unwinnable battle.

The Ironwood Compact agrees to Valorie’s proposal. On the 26th of Monova, Rosemary and his Zerth jailers wait at the ready for the planar key to be delivered. As the Tarrasque burrows towards the Elemental Gate of Earth, Valorie, Yezra, Kel’Soveen, Confidence, and Parsnip transport themselves to Tempus’s Divine Realm, intending to find the planar key, return to the material plane, and then travel to the Tarrasque to banish it using another of Valorie’s spells, that “transformed her allies into swift wisps of cloud.” This plan is of a sort with the second and third acts of many Tempus Epics: a great journey across the planes and miles of territory, followed by a climactic encounter with a powerful monster. However, the actual travels the party deals with are quickly dismissed by the Epic, and the number of words spent discussing them amount to less than a third of the number of words spent discussing the debates about where to banish the Tarrasque. “The Banishing” depicts travel as a necessary but boring part of adventure that both the protagonists and the reader would like to skip over as quickly as possible. The Compact faces no difficulties as they travel, aided as they are by fail-safe magic. In an inversion of the classic Tempus formula, the planning period of “The Banishing of the Tarrasque” is where solutions are discovered, rather than being found on the road by heroes willing to carry on despite not having a firm plan for when they reach their destination.

In less than two paragraphs, Valorie teleports the Compact to Tempus’s Realm, and they reconnoiter. The geography of the Heavens is a topic that vastly exceeds the scope of the work; to the Compact, Tempus’ Realm appears to be a forested valley with homes built onto the mountainsides. An immense ruined arena is at the valley’s center, built such that every other point in the valley can see it. After Kel’Soveen shouts a challenge to Tempus, asking for the key, he is answered with an instruction to head to that arena.

Tempus’ Arena is a circle of tall stone pillars surrounding a smooth pit compacted into the ground. As the Compact arrives at the pit, they are greeted by a warrior resting on the tallest pillar. He introduces himself as Blondie Katana, Monk of the Way of Steel, sent by Tempus to challenge the Ironwood Compact for a key to Tempus’ Realm. Blondie Katana is a well-documented figure in Tempus myths that pre-date “The Banishing,” another literary allusion to cement the parody. Blondie serves in the story as a classic test of worthiness, an obstacle placed by Tempus (in this case literally, in most other cases by powerful servants of Tempus) in front of the hero or heroes to demonstrate the moral lesson of the Tempus Epic. Normally, a test of worthiness in a Tempus Epic is an explicit demonstration of the necessity of straightforward opposition to evil; the protagonist cannot succeed or escape the test until they confidently fight head-on. In the “Banishing,” however, this test is instead used to highlight how each member of the Compact engages with the threat posed by the Tarrasque, and shows how the Compact as a whole still overcomes their obstacles when only a few of them accept Tempus’ morality.

As could be easily predicted, Blondie Katana challenges the Compact to a duel for the planar key, and, after some discussion, the Compact accepts. They are telekinetically yanked into the center of the pit, and Blondie Katana leaps down on them from above, hewing left and right with his namesake weapon as he calls up lesser spirits of Tempus to aid him. Blondie is clearly more powerful than any single member of the Compact, and they scramble to stop him.

Yezra Stormfriend, the Cleric of Tempus and the only member of the Compact to fully embody his teachings, rushes forward to fight Blondie spear-to-katana. She answers the challenge of Tempus, attempting to tackle the threat head on. Parsnip joins Yezra, summoning up a wave of thorns to hinder Blondie, but the Monk evades these and remains focused on Yezra during the opening stages of the fight. Parsnip attempts to follow Tempus’ morality, but finds himself lacking the physical strength to carry through. Valorie Vayer, likewise a poor combatant despite her magical mastery, weaves a spell of invisibility around Confidence, and then spends the rest of the fight hurling mockery and invective at Blondie to trip up his attacks. She aids her companions and then relies on them to win the battle, rather than trying, as Parsnip does, to fight from the front despite her disadvantages. Confidence, taking advantage of Valorie’s spell, begins kiting and firing his magical crossbow, Raincutter, dealing considerable damage. Confidence engages Blondie effectively, but he depends on Valorie’s magic and his allies to keep Blondie Katana away from him; he is only effective because of his allies. Finally, Kel’Soveen, noted coward, uses his magic to throw himself away from the threat, landing atop one of the pillars and firing down on Blondie. Though some of the spirits Blondie summons lash at him, Kel’Soveen “bore the Corpsemonger’s Aid, which warded him against the undead, and thus avoided all injury in the battle.” Kel’Soveen does not abandon his companions or his cause; but, with his mastery of transportation and warding magic, he places himself where he is at the lowest risk of all his party. Kel’Soveen first sees to his own safety, and only then contributes to the battle. Unlike in a traditional Tempestuous Epic, however, Kel’Soveen’s safety is not torn away for his moral impecunity; instead, he successfully escapes harm with his ploy, in contrast to Yezra.

As the battle with Blondie progresses, all of the Compact deals some damage to Blondie Katana, all but Yezra fighting from a distance. But Blondie shrugs off their blows until Yezra, in a massive display of power, calls down a lightning bolt on Blondie through her weapon Stormguide, which empowers the lightning “until it was like the striking of a Storm Giant.” In a superb display of martial skill, however, Blondie rolls around the brunt of the blast, “though all his side was singed and scared with it,” and stabs Yezra through the chest, knocking her out of the fight. Valorie then steps in front of Yezra, shielding her from Blondie’s next strike and barely keeping her invisibility spell together. In this distraction, Confidence fires his crossbow squarely into the back of Blondie’s skull, killing him. With only Yezra struck down, the Compact regroups, and Valorie quickly uses magic to heal and regenerate Yezra. The battle ends with a messy but clear Compact victory.

It is difficult to analyze the Compact’s battle with Blondie and conclude that they learned Tempus’ moral lesson. The only character who changed from “immoral” to “moral” tactics in the fight was Valorie, who took Blondie’s strikes directly after Yezra was felled to defend her body. Valorie was faced with the choice between abandoning her ally, or facing danger head-on to keep her safe, and she chose the morally necessary danger. But this does not allow Valorie to overcome Blondie; instead, it is Confidence, who has been hiding behind magic and stealth for the entire fight, who deals the final blow. Yezra, despite dealing more damage to Blondie than any other member of the Compact, ends the battle unconscious and bleeding out on the ground, overcome by Blondie’s superior might. The only Compact member who fully embraces Tempus’ teachings is shown to be weaker than His test, despite facing it in the morally correct way. Her struggle is echoed by Parsnip, who also attempts to encounter Blondie head-on, but whose spellcraft is wholly shown up by Yezra. The moral courage to confront one’s enemies head-on is not a guarantee of effectiveness; morality does not equate to power. The Compact’s victory over Blondie comes because Yezra (and, when she is the only one left to do so, Valorie) tanks Blondie’s aggression and allows all of her allies (except possibly Parsnip) to retreat and begin fighting Blondie at the range they prefer. Yezra made the Compact’s victory possible; but so too did her more discerning allies like Confidence. The battle against Blondie shows that Tempus’s wisdom, that problems must be faced head-on to be overcome, has a caveat: some people can face problems less directly, and be not only safer but more effective, if others are willing to take the front. This, in turn, undermines Tempus’ moral conclusion: in the battle against Blondie, it was the more effective and therefore morally correct decision for Confidence to avoid Blondie as much as possible. Thus, he never faces Tempus’ challenge. He need not choose between defeating his foe or being safe; he can better defeat his foe by letting someone else keep him safe. But Confidence had that option only because Yezra, Parsnip, and Valorie helped him. Because Confidence has Yezra, someone who is willing to take on the mantle of the Tempestuous Hero, in his group, he himself needn’t have the virtues of a Tempestuous Hero. Thus, the fight with Blondie Katana recreates the Compact’s entire strategy to deal with the Tarrasque in miniature: because Tempus exists, they can allow Tempus to face the Tarrasque instead of them. By existing, Tempus makes it so that folk need not take on his morals and burdens.

If Tempus and Blondie Katana are displeased by the Compact’s conduct in their battle, they make no mention of it. Blondie Katana rises in ethereal form from his perforated corpse, and presents his weapon, which will also serve as a planar key, to Valorie. She demurs, saying Yezra fought Blondie best and deserves to hold his weapon. Blondie delivers the Katana, wishes the Compact success, and watches as the Compact uses a magic item to transport back to their home, a journey that, once again,  is barely explored, done in two lines.

Back in the East, the Compact gathers together with Rosemary, who expresses eagerness to battle the Tarrasque, and the three Zerths who watch him. They make their last preparations, then Valorie uses her magic to transmute the group into clouds, and they soar over the hills and Mountains to the Earthgate.

As they approach the Tarrasque, however, another flier begins to pursue the swooping mist: the dragon Takaj, the Djinnbane, a known ally of Xovreme and a powerful wizard. Takaj is the Compact’s last obstacle before they encounter the Tarrasque, and is in many ways depicted as a minor saga villain in their own right. They too blaspheme against Tempus: “Accompanying the Djinnbane were two lightning-breathing Behirs (a sacred creature to some Tempus sects) whom they had broken to their will and enhanced with magic to imbue them with speed.” Takaj also aids Xovreme’s plan to collapse the planes, though their reasons for doing so are not specified. The Compact, seeing this threat, holds another shorter planning interlude. In this case, retreat or subterfuge are discarded as implausible, and the Compact instead descends to a valley to wait for and confront Takaj directly. Valorie casts a warding blink spell on herself. Confidence and Parsnip try to hide themselves. Kel’Soveen runs several hundred feet from the fight and prepares to fire at Takaj at range. Only Yezra and the Zerths hold firm out in the open. Rosemary, claiming he needs every iota of his power to defeat the Tarrasque, finds a hole, hides in it, and is not heard from for the rest of the fight, further cementing his secondary role in the saga.

Takaj arrives and taunts the Compact with the futility of their deeds, in a rather bland and uninspiring fashion. Their Behirs follow, one from either end of the valley the Compact settled into. Just as the three draconids are about to attack, Takaj receives “some signal from Xovreme,” and, disgustedly, they begin to withdraw from the battle, preparing to sweep out of the fight.

Kel’Soveen and Parsnip unload powerful ranged attack spells against Takaj as they do so, angering them. They descend and batter the Zerths with their icy breath, though each Zerth holds firm through it. The Zerths batter Takaj psychically, and Valorie and Confidence focus on the still-approaching Behirs. Yezra is left unable to do anything, trapped in the middle of the fight far from any opponents. As the Behirs close, the Zerths move to fight one, and Confidence, Parsnip, and Valorie fight the other. Neither of these groups appears effective at first, and one Zerth (never named) is even brought down, though they “returned to Shra’kt’lor by the Giths’ blessings as soon as their strength failed.” Only Kel’Soveen continues to battle Takaj, unleashing his magic at great range, where he cannot be counter-attacked.

Takaj, unfortunately, is themself a powerful spellweaver, and teleports next to Kel’Soveen before beginning to savage them in the air with claws and fangs. Kel’Soveen, woefully unprepared for a melee battle, is quickly left “bloodied and staggered” on his mountain overlook. No ally can reach Kel’Soveen to defend him due to his own choice of placement, and Takaj can counter Kel’Soveen’s teleportation magic; his death seems imminent. However, “with impeccable timing, The Great Traveller began the casting of one teleportation, and when Takaj began its counter, he moved to cast another spell, reaching into his Arcanum to open a great portal beneath him. Then, abandoning his flight, he fell swiftly towards his escape. Though the portal was vertical, and he broke both his legs on the ground near it, he rolled through, and emerged near Yezra, foiling Takaj entirely.” The Compact then turns the fight around entirely. Parsnip, Valorie, and Confidence slay one Behir; Valorie deals its deathblow with bardic magic, again being forced to face her opponent head-on because Yezra is still far from the engagement. The two remaining Zerths slay the other Behir;  St’Rel, the only named Zerth in the saga, deals its deathblow with a lucky strike to its head. With their allies dead and no foes left separated from the group, Takaj retreats with haste to Xovreme.

If the battle against Blondie Katana shows how Tempestuous Heroes spare others from taking up their own moral framework, the battle against Takaj deconstructs the Tempestuous ideal of strength itself. Yezra, paragon of the Tempestuous Hero, spends the entire fight against Takaj gallivanting around, trying to engage Takaj or a Behir, unable to strike a blow due to distance. Her immense strength is rendered useless because Takaj simply chooses not to engage her where she is. Parsnip suffers similar treatment: he is able to land a blow on Takaj with a powerful spell of moonlight, but when Takaj moves away from where Parsnip has concentrated his magic, Parsnip is forced to abandon the attack and defaults to helping Confidence and Valorie fight a Behir. Takaj’s superior mobility gives them the power to simply ignore the Tempestuous heroes, rendering their strength moot. Confidence and Valorie are slightly more effective; they at least are able to slay a Behir with their ranged weapons and skirmishing techniques. The Zerths are even better: thanks to their fail-safe escape magic, they can freely fight the Behir without worrying about their own safety.

But only Kel’Soveen truly bests Takaj in this fight. Kel’Soveen’s immense range allows him to engage Takaj at his choosing. Takaj attempts to change this dynamic with teleportation magic, but Kel’Soveen’s superior mastery of teleportation allows him to reverse Takaj’s trap and flee to an advantageous position, again retreating behind a true Tempestuous Hero for safety. It is easy to read the description of Kel’Soveen literally crawling through his escape portal as pathetic. But by being pathetic Kel’Soveen is also effective, in a way none of his allies are. Kel’Soveen’s range and maneuverability is what drives Takaj off, when they would otherwise have flown around and engaged the Compact at their leisure. The power to choose where and when one engages with the enemy is shown to be far stronger than skill at arms, and one can sometimes win a fight by effectively, or even desperately, retreating to a better position. This is not strength as Tempus defines it, but this is what wins the Compact’s fight against Takaj.

With Takaj flying away, an ebullient Kel’Soveen proposes to follow and slay them, but Valorie dissuades him from this, saying that there could be more enemies before the group can face the Tarrasque. Agreeing, the group begins walking by foot into the treacherous Earthgate Mountains. However, no more threats emerge, until the Compact catches sight of a mobile earthquake in the distance, making its way closer. This is the Tarrasque, burrowing underground.

His foe at last in sight, Rosemary steps forward to perform the Banishing of the Tarrasque:

> Then Rosemary took up his implements and the katana, twice as long as he was tall. “I’d ask you to wish me luck, but I won’t need it,” he boasted one last time. Then Rosemary disappeared in a flash, and soon the rumbling bulge of earth stopped in front of the Compact. Then came a great roaring, more dire and mighty than any dragon or demon, and the earth convulsed like the sea in storm. Thus the battle continued for a full minute, and then suddenly the earth grew still for a moment. Then it collapsed down into a great sinkhole, and no more tremors were heard.
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Thus, in a single paragraph, the titular monster and archenemy of “The Banishing” is dealt with outside of both the Compact and the reader’s view. Rosemary’s incredible feats of wizardry, alone against the monster, are treated as unimportant compared to the planning and Hero is treated like a side character in his own epic, because he very much is. The power to overcome an unstoppable foe is valuable; but Rosemary could not have ever faced the Tarrasque had the Compact not rescued, equipped, and protected him long enough to engage the Tarrasque in battle. Rather than a glorious, self-motivated, morally improving quest, Rosemary’s banishing of the Tarrasque is depicted as the fulfillment of the Compact’s scheme. The Compact made the plot of  a Tempestuous Epic take place. They recruited a well-established hero and placed him on the path to victory, rather than trying to slay their foe themselves. And none set up more of this than Valorie Vayer, the Versed Bard, who negotiated for Rosemary’s release, organized the plan for him to engage the Tarrasque, and transported the Compact across planes and miles of territory with her magic to make the plot of the “epic” happen—the storyteller told the story necessary to overcome the threat she faced. Valorie Vayer, with the Compact beside her, set up the logistics of the Tempestuous Epic, ensuring that the hero had what he needed, could go where he was needed, and faced no more threats than his strength could withstand on his journey. How many other Tempestuous Epics had a similar architect preparing the heroes’ path, disguised as a humble sidekick or background character?

“The Banishing of the Tarrasque” concludes as Rosemary’s corpse is dug up from the wreckage of his last feat. The Compact resolves to attempt to resurrect him, but clearly are not particularly forceful about the effort; Rosemary’s egotism did not endear him to them. The resurrection attempt fails, and the Zerths eventually return with Rosemary’s corpse to Shra’kt’lor, where the Mengyar reincarnates Rosemary as a Flail Snail to serve out the remainder of his sentence and returns the Ax of Endings and Valenyesh to the Compact. The Compact returns home in success, their other members having slain Xovreme as they were escorting Rosemary to the Tarrasque. The Compact’s decision to avoid fighting the Tarrasque is vindicated: if even Rosemary, conjurer nonpareil, was slain by the beast, it surely would have been a dire battle for them to attempt themselves. Because there existed great heroes who could fight the Tarrasque in the Compact’s stead, it was safer for the Compact and for the world to find those heroes and guide them to defeat the Tarrasque instead of them; to pass the buck, whatever it took.

The saga’s final lines, as are traditional for a Tempestuous Epic, describe the Tarrasque’s final fate: not the decomposition or display of its remains, as is more common, but rather the living Tarrasque’s eternal battle with Tempus. “Whenever it pleased the Stormlord or His champions,” they did battle with the Tarrasque at their leisure. When slain, it would spring up anew, to test the heroes of Tempus again; but so great was the Stormlord that there was no risk of the Tarrasque sundering its bonds or slaying the God in his own realm. “The Banishing of the Tarrasque” does not describe in detail any of Tempus’ battles with the Tarrasque, as their nature is not known. But, given the outcome is all but certain, we can imagine that those stories would be less interesting, anyway, than the story we have been given.

“The Banishing of the Tarrasque” is an unusual story, an unusual parody, and an unusual morality tale. It proposes that the heroes who face danger head on and perform the mightiest feats are not always the most important figures in stopping disaster. It shows how transportation, especially teleportation, gives people much more power through versatility than mere physical might. It shows that the moral necessity of opposing evil directly can easily be diluted if the opportunity to effectively oppose evil indirectly exists. It shows that the greatest Tempestuous Heroes end the conditions that they themselves emerged in. It is a strange tale to have had such an outsize impact on the religion of the Stormlord. Yet, perhaps that is not true. For all that it deconstructs Tempestuous morality, the “Banishing of the Tarrasque” also reifies it. Without Tempus, symbol of strength against evil, the Compact could not have succeeded. Nor is their redirection of responsibility motivated by cowardice, but by the same force of will and moral necessity that motivates the traditional heroes of a Tempestuous Epic. Though they prove by their actions that the logisticians, diplomats, travelers, tricksters, and sidekicks of an Epic can be even more important to its success than the hero, the Compact still chooses to fight the Tarrasque with a familiar tale: the lead a mighty hero to victory over his impossible foe. In the parody of “The Banishing of the Tarrasque” are the seeds of a reconstruction: a story giving equal weight to those who do great deeds, and those who plan how great deeds can be done.

1. ↑ This allusion is so obvious that Eeks and other authors have used it as evidence for the sincerity of the author’s effort to mimic a Tempus Epic. However, given that stealing Tempus’ own power is much more obvious blasphemy than that practiced by any traditional Epic villain, it seems more likely that this allusion was intended to highlight the author’s satirizing of the structure.
2. ↑ Mengayr Ag’s personality is not fully explored in “The Banishing,” but what the reader sees of him is morally questionable if not outright evil. He holds prisoner several creatures clearly aligned with Tempus’ ethos, such as a Bronze Dragon and a Coautl, based on absurd charges such as trying to get him to laugh.
3. ↑ Valorie Vayer persuaded the captain-of-the-guard in Shra’kt’lor to ask for volunteers to fight Xovreme, and these Zerths volunteered.
4. ↑ Again, the structure of the “Banishing of the Tarrasque” alludes so obviously to the structure of Tempus Epics, with a journey to Tempus’s Realm literally giving the protagonists the power to overcome their unbeatable opponent, that previous scholars such as Eeks have taken this as proof of the author’s sincere intentions. However, the treatment of the importance of the journey in the Epic, and the context of what the protagonists were trying to accomplish with it, reveals the parody, as we will see.
5. ↑ The etymology of Blondie Katana’s name has been the subject of centuries of scholarly debate. The current consensus, best summed up by Sel’nit of Windhome, is that “he probably made it up himself because he thought it sounded cool.”
6. ↑ This could be read as Valorie rejecting the morality of Tempus she displayed in the battle’s final moments when she took Blondie’s blows head-on. By rejecting Blondie’s weapon, she rejects the validity of the lesson Blondie taught her, refusing the morals of a Tempestuous Hero even if she is willing to sometimes play the role.
7. ↑ Valorie could also be read as wielding the same sort of power Kel’Soveen and Takaj display, choosing how and where she engages her enemies in the fight. She does this by persuading the Zerths to help the Compact, and by using her summoning and warding magic to make it difficult for the Behir to concentrate its ire on her until it is nearly dead.
8. ↑ Some versions of the saga instead propose that Rosemary faked his death and plane shifted away, leaving behind a fake corpse to fool the Gith’zerai. This would be yet another example of how the power of movement and teleportation is lauded in the saga, though it would undermine the parody’s justification of the Compact’s choice to avoid fighting the Tarrasque head-on.

**Expedition Result:** Success

**Expedition Level:** 17, reduced to 16 (Benefits Port Vrall, minimum 2 XP)

**Expedition Loot:** Rosemary’s “Corpse,” the Tarrasque being beaned into another dimension.