Season 2, Episode 25: Stand and Delivery

*The following article contains spoilers for Season 2. Please listen to the season in its entirety or be warned!*

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**Stand and Delivery** is the 25th episode of season 2 of *Dungeons and Daddies*.

## Description

*The teens tackle Principal Tony Pepperoni's loneliness*.

## Introduction

A parody of The Barenaked Ladies' *One Week* recapping the last episode.

## Rad Facts

Taylor Swift (Freddie Wong): Taylor's new years resolution is to do more fan-dubs of animes. He has tried his hand at it before the events of season 2 started, but he couldn't get a YouTube downloader that worked and infected his mom's computer with spyware.

\*Normal Oak (Will Campos): Normal's main career goal is to be a mascot, but his backup is to be a therapist because he thinks it's just like being a mascot, just for one person.

\*Lincoln Li-Wilson (Matt Arnold): Lincoln's new years resolution is the same as every year, which is that this year he will not get sick. He gets sick every January, however.

Scary Marlowe (Beth May): Scary's least favorite song is *Happy Birthday To You*.

Dungeon Master (Anthony Burch): A week ago, Anthony went to a comedy open mic. He also recommends going to see the sheer confidence in some people, for instance, there was one guy who went up and after every punchline he punched the air and said "Kablam".

\**Will took Matt's spot in the order after making a joke that Beth understood, which is why he is listed before Matt here.*

## Plot Summary

### Tour de Tony

The teens decide to deal with Tony Pepperoni, the embodiment of the anchor of loneliness. They join an early morning faculty meeting, pretending to be a aspiring teachers that want to observe Tony’s work for a day. After a discussion, they decide that rather than trying to kill him, they (except for Scary) want to cure his loneliness to destroy the anchor inside.

Tony seems happy to have them following him around. He tries to impart some wisdom but immediately stumbles into saying something that could be misconstrued as racially insensitive.

On the way to an English class, he and Scary get into an exchange that ends in a crying breakdown over his wife leaving.

They hoard the sobbing man into the classroom they had debated the mayor in, still covered in viscera from the incursion event. Tony’s relationship to his wife, Desdemona Pizza, has grown distant over the years. Recently he has been receiving explicit texts from her that were meant for Big Ralphy, the principal of a rival school.

Scary once again advocates for killing him. Taylor, applying old anime wisdom, suggests that to be happy he needs to be surrounded by potential love interests, so they try to set him up with Mae Hailes and create a Tinder profile in his name. Mae is not interested. She also blocks Link's number after one exchange with Scary.

Tony calls his wife, with the teens directing him on what to say. He confronts her about the R-A-L-P-F situation. She explains that it is mostly a sexual relationship, at which point the five stumble their way into pretending that he his also cheating on her with Ralph. Desdemona ends the relationship and hangs up.

### Library Standoff

It turns out that Tony’s wife works at the library next to the rival high school. On meeting his wife, he clears up the cheating misunderstanding. Desdemona states very clearly that she is not in love with Tony anymore and wants to end the marriage. Normal runs off for ten minutes to blow up his inflatable Teeny helmet.

While the others still try to fix their marriage, Taylor goes off the print out Anime and meets Hero Oak, who trashes him for his basic taste in Toy Sutory anime. They exchange escalating insults and death threats. Taylor leaves convinced he is progressing on her route, while Hero leaves with genuine resentment for him.

It is dramatically revealed that Ralph is in the library with them: right behind Normal, trying to steal the Teeny costume off his head. They get the security guard to chase him out and upload a viral video of him shouting “I didn’t touch a kid!”. This only makes Desdemona more upset with her husband.

The teens, seeing that the marriage is beyond salvaging, pivot to befriending Tony themselves. Tony tries to declare his friendship to the teens but immediately stumbles into saying something that could be misconstrued as pedophilic. Taylor checks out some Manga.

On the way back, they see some of the mayor's acolytes still wreaking havoc.

### The Two Month Where They Just Watch Anime

Tony moves into his office. Taylor has printed out some Anime frame by frame and they spend a month getting him donuts, coffee and reading/watching anime after school.

When they try to rope in Margarita, she drops some truth about relationship health and the importance of divorce. She is shocked when they reveal that he has been watching anime for a month straight, but agrees to join them once. Watching Parento Turappo 4 with her to get them to bond does not work out. Another month passes.

The Tinder profile they set up only got two hits: a sex worker and a horse.

Since over two month they only managed to drop Tony’s loneliness meter down to 80%, the desperate teens decide they need to change strategy again.

Scary calls Willy pretending to be her god-grandmother, Beth May. He implies that he can only help her if she lets him out and suggests that she open the door locked with the magic garage opener.

Link convinces Marco to host a dinner party at their house the next day, to give Tony the opportunity to socialize with other adults. Scary calls the real Beth May (old) and invites her.

### The Dinner Party

The party is attended by Tony Pepperoni, Beth May, Marco Li-Wilson, several of Marco’s friends and the teens. Tony, failing to make friends, continues to spiral, crying out for anyone to just kill him already (if it helps, he is racist and has some real fucked up opinions about women too).

Scary steals the garage door opener from Link while he is arguing with Normal and clicks the door at the HQ open. The teens go upstairs.

An hour later there is a knock at the door. Marco opens. They hear him shocked, asking whether he should call an ambulance for the person at the door. Link, trying to peak, falls down the stairs. He sees Willy at the door, beaten up and bloody, and finds the garage door opener missing from his pockets.

Willy offers Scary to take care of their problem. Scary “Go ahead”s him. He pulls a knife from a knife holder and stabs it into Tony Pepperoni’s throat. Normal runs to heal him, but is held back by Willy. Link is by Tony’s side as he dies, comforting him. He hears his last words: “Tell Margarita…”

Marco points a knife at Willy. Link confronts Scary about the garage opener, which she admits to stealing, and throws her out. Willy leaves with her.

## Trivia

* They get an item of the week from the HQ: a shady baseball cap that lets you blend in anywhere