recursal/Fanatic-Fandom huggingface dataset:
A Fin in Time - Part 5

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Carve a buzzard out of cheddar cheese and throw it at the nearest grandma

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
Post-Cerebral Celebration

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Telduria World Map

## **Kingdom of Vesh**

### **The City of Arylon**

The City of Arylon is the capital of the vast Kingdom of Vesh and is located along the River of Woe in Southeast Telduria. The city itself boasts a population of roughly 11,000 people, most of which are human. It is a large trade hub, due to its location, so there are daily open air markets selling a wide variety of goods.

It is led by Queen Dara Vesh, a rather friendly woman in her mid-30s. Her family has been in power here for centuries and they have been responsible for the majority of the growth the region has sustained throughout the years since the Foul Upheaval. It was decided that Dara would rule after tragedy struck her family 10 years ago. She was unanimously supported by the local populace due to her grace, charm and strength both in the throne and on the battlefield.

She has one surviving relative today, her younger brother Titus, who is in line to be her successor. A local rumor states their parents and older brother Marcus were killed while in transit between local townships by unknown assassins a few years ago but their bodies were never found. No one in the region can fathom why Dara’s beloved family would have been targeted like that but she has remained ever vigilant in trying to find who was responsible.

### **Notable Locations**

#### **The Mourning Wood Inn**

Nestled into the market square of Arylon is a large Inn and Tavern sporting a large sign out front depicting a weeping willow tree. It is run by Donovan Briar, a sweet old man in his 70s, and his daughter Mercy (40s). He is completely unaware that the name for his business has other connotations and his daughter and patronage at this point have given up on trying to explain this to him because he is just too nice to everyone. He has a resident "guard dog" named Jackson that follows him everywhere. The dog is rather overweight and is about as effective of a guard dog as a feather is as a doorstop.

## **Map Credit: Maxime Plasse**

Campaign map credit goes to Maxime Plasse. The map for Telduria was originally a commission for an Australian RPG club and he was kind enough to allow us to use this same map for our podcast. Thanks Max!!!

**Max's Website:**
http://maxsmaps.com

**Deviant Art:**
http://maximeplasse.deviantart.com
Unfinished Business

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

### **The Field Vs. Fields Controversy**

Typically an IYRLU would begin with:

> "...and if you like us, right now, you love us Sally Field and the whole deal..."
>
>
>

For a period of time "Field" was used interchangeably with "Fields", and there is a minor on going jokey dispute between cast members as to the correct useage to this day.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
The Master Will Be Displeased - Part 3

* N/A

## **Inventory Changes**

"It's jerking him off into the darkness" - James

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

You should try something you've never done before and really put maybe, you know, some would say an unhealthy amount of energy into it. Others would say enthusiasm. Others would say, you know, encouraging feelings about it. You can write tons of songs, whether you like to sing, or not, these are words on a page, and at the top you can put Hapless Heroes Inspiration for you, and, you know, this is a dollar amount to your pleasure, to your convenience, photocopy these lyrics and pass them out wherever you find yourself in, I wouldn't say a very crowded area, but certainly a very populated area, (one might even say to put these messages into a bottle and release them out to sea). I would imagine paper airplanes. I would imagine little flyers that just regularly get folded into origami pieces left on your neighbors doorstep. The sky is your limit, and so is the ocean, and the rest of the planet. That's pretty much what you got.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
The Megaplan™

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

### **The Field Vs. Fields Controversy**

Typically an IYRLU would begin with:

> "...and if you like us, right now, you love us Sally Field and the whole deal..."
>
>
>

For a period of time "Field" was used interchangeably with "Fields", and there is a minor on going jokey dispute between cast members as to the correct useage to this day.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
A Weekend At Jed's

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Justice for the Just

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

### **The Field Vs. Fields Controversy**

Typically an IYRLU would begin with:

> "...and if you like us, right now, you love us Sally Field and the whole deal..."
>
>
>

For a period of time "Field" was used interchangeably with "Fields", and there is a minor on going jokey dispute between cast members as to the correct useage to this day.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
A Fin in Time - Part 27 - A Different Kind of Ascension

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Do a little web search for the arcade machine 'International Shootout' and procure one, pay for it, then contact me and I'll tell you where to send it. I've just been thinking about that machine lately, it's very fun. It's like a paddle soccer game. It's kind of a cross between air hockey and foosball, and I used to play it when I was a teen all the time at Game Zone. I've had a hankering it for it. Buy it for US, and then contact US, and I'll send you an address to send that for US.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
The Lighthouse of Legrodex - Part 4

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Full Play 3 - Part 3 - One Way In, No Way Out

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

### **The Field Vs. Fields Controversy**

Typically an IYRLU would begin with:

> "...and if you like us, right now, you love us Sally Field and the whole deal..."
>
>
>

For a period of time "Field" was used interchangeably with "Fields", and there is a minor on going jokey dispute between cast members as to the correct useage to this day.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Below the Barracks - Part 3

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Full Play 3 - Part 1 - How Did We Get Here?

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

### **The Field Vs. Fields Controversy**

Typically an IYRLU would begin with:

> "...and if you like us, right now, you love us Sally Field and the whole deal..."
>
>
>

For a period of time "Field" was used interchangeably with "Fields", and there is a minor on going jokey dispute between cast members as to the correct useage to this day.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Grapple and Slap, a Kwin Story

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Below the Barracks - Part 2

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Premature Evacuation - Part 2

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Lighthouse Intern-lude - Part 3

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Cannon-nade - Part 2

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Love yourself. Just take some time, because you know what. It's been hard for everyone, I think. Especially this last year and I think it is high time we tell you to take some time to love yourself, because if you love us, how can you possibly love us, if you can't love yourself. So take yourself out on a safe walk wearing your mask throughout your neighborhood, even though it is probably cold outside right now doesn't matter, or take up a new hobby, or try to find a D&D game for yourself in you're not currently in one. Just do something to take care of yourself, and love yourself and therefore be able to perform all the other loving actions to show us how much you really love us.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
Battling the Black Drake

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

### **The Field Vs. Fields Controversy**

Typically an IYRLU would begin with:

> "...and if you like us, right now, you love us Sally Field and the whole deal..."
>
>
>

For a period of time "Field" was used interchangeably with "Fields", and there is a minor on going jokey dispute between cast members as to the correct useage to this day.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Spire Showdown - Part 2

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Start an 80's hair metal cover band except the only song you will be covering is umpteen different versions of the Hapless Heroes theme song, and you're going to play them every which way, as long as it's 80's themed, and you're gonna to make every song's lyrics about how people should listen to our show. You're just going to wear them out with the Hapless Hero's theme song until they are compelled to listen to this show.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
A Fin in Time - Part 18 - Pocket-sized Problems

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Make some pickled ramps, and really enjoy those

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
Pick A Door, Any Door

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Find a small gender appropriate swimsuit put it on underneath whatever set of clothing you might be comfortable in prior to doing so you will want to write the name of our podcast on/about your body you're going to save your money for one calendar year. You are going to purchase a ticket for the Super Bowl when the Bills are in the Super Bowl next year. You're going to go down to the sideline and very nicely make friends with the security guard, get him to maybe take a picture of something the opposite direction, ditch your clothes, sprint onto the field. There will be children watching, hence the swimsuit, who don't want you full nude, and run around with Hapless Heroes at the Super Bowl that the Bills are playing at.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
Crash Landed

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Don't Look Down

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Public (Character) Assassination

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
A Truly Strange Interlude

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Incessantly try to start games of telephone and position yourself as the last person every time just so you can intentionally mishear and miscommunicate the final message every time which will be "Listen to the Hapless Heroes Podcast"

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
Follow the Stooge

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
The Lighthouse of Legrodex - Part 5

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
If You Really Love Us

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.4*

## **Summary**

If You Really Love Us (IYRLU), is a recurring end of show feature where a member of the cast suggest a way that the audience can promote the podcast.

## **Origin**

The feature started organically at the end of episode 26 The Sinister Sanctuary - Part 1 where Zach suggested a way to promote the podcast to listeners. At the time the feature having just been created didn't have the "If You Really Love Us" name tag this developed later as it became solidified as part of Zach's legacy.

## **History**

As the podcast evolved, there became a more standardised way to launch into the feature directly and it is now name checked or launched into with a version of

"...and if you like us, right now, you love us Sally Field and the whole deal..."

**Here is how it evolved over time:**

The original episode 26 If You Really Love Us:

Evolving into "if you really really like us" by episode 27.5

The addition of "if you love us" began at episode 44

The final form at the present time from episode 194 has the addition of "Sally Field and the whole deal"

After Zach and his main character Perodil Linkinwoods stepped away from the show the feature can often be heard being affectionately refered to as "A Zach" refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature, and an homage to their friend and cast member.

When Phil and his character Hedric The Entertainer stepped away from the show, he left a very heartfelt and in keeping with his character IYRLU at the end of episode 196 The Master Will Be Displeased - Part 3, which had him reflecting on the past year (2020) and the difficulties presented by the then pandemic, and how much the podcast has meant to him. His very much in character IYRLU can be heard here:

## **Format**

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc.

## **The Field Vs. Fields Controversy**

Typically an IYRLU would begin with:

"...and if you like us, right now, you love us Sally Field and the whole deal..."

For a period of time "Field" was used interchangeably with "Fields", and there is a minor on going jokey dispute between cast members as to the correct useage to this day.

## **Reinhoc (The Tireless Transcriber)**

Discord community member and longterm fan of the podcast Reinhoc has been transcribing the If You Really Love us feature since 17th April 2018 and each week in the discord channel of the same name is populated with their transcriptions for everyone to enjoy and work towards, if they so choose.

As a historical footnote, prior to Reinhoc, Francesco had been keeping track of them in sumurised form up to episode 74 when the torch was passed on officially on 24th April 2018.
Dark City Tarantis - Part 6

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Set up a tent on the sidewalk and put a big banner over it that says, "Lovely Happy Circus Time" and hire a person to maneuver people into the tent to enjoy the circus attraction that is yourself dressed up as Princess Peach cooking bacon and you'll be very happy to see the people walking through the tent flap and you'll say "Hey everybody, it's me" and you'll say your name, and you'll say "Hope you don't mind. I cooked you some bacon dressed up as Princess Peach here. By the way, listen to Hapless Heroes Podcast. It's great. I love it."

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
A Fin in Time - Part 22 - One For The History Books

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Make fifty pounds of garlic bread and bring it to the nearest Bed, Bath, and Beyond, and go inside and say "Hey, your delivery of garlic bread is here. It's time to sell garlic bread at Bed, Bath, and Beyond, today." and become very indignant when they try to kick you out and when the police come tell them to listen to Hapless Heroes Podcast An Original D&D Campaign

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
Plane of (Fore)Shadow - Part 4

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Plane of (Fore)Shadow - Part 7

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
The Dirty Half Dozen

*"This is great. We finally got the team back together."*
―Grant Ward***The Dirty Half Dozen*** is the nineteenth episode of the second season of the television series *Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.*.

## Synopsis

Gonzales and Coulson must find a way to put their differences aside and work together against HYDRA, even if it means teaming up with someone they don’t trust.
Spooky Special - Monster Party Monster Mash - Part 4

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

### **The Field Vs. Fields Controversy**

Typically an IYRLU would begin with:

> "...and if you like us, right now, you love us Sally Field and the whole deal..."
>
>
>

For a period of time "Field" was used interchangeably with "Fields", and there is a minor on going jokey dispute between cast members as to the correct useage to this day.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Spooktacular Special 2021 - Part 1

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

We want you to improve upon the PR of razor blades around this time of year I think they get a bad rap and to help that out we want you to make a new candy, that's a little gummy candy. Make them in the shape of gummy razor blades and they'll be Hapless Heroes brand Yummy Gummy Razor Blades and the mascot on the bag will be an esophagus that is bleeding out and it's catchphrase will be, "This was Fran's idea."

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
Igor's Challenge - Part 3

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

### **The Field Vs. Fields Controversy**

Typically an IYRLU would begin with:

> "...and if you like us, right now, you love us Sally Field and the whole deal..."
>
>
>

For a period of time "Field" was used interchangeably with "Fields", and there is a minor on going jokey dispute between cast members as to the correct useage to this day.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Spooky Special - Monster Party Monster Mash - Part 1

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

### **The Field Vs. Fields Controversy**

Typically an IYRLU would begin with:

> "...and if you like us, right now, you love us Sally Field and the whole deal..."
>
>
>

For a period of time "Field" was used interchangeably with "Fields", and there is a minor on going jokey dispute between cast members as to the correct useage to this day.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Fighting Corruption

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Super Secret Plans

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

### **The Field Vs. Fields Controversy**

Typically an IYRLU would begin with:

> "...and if you like us, right now, you love us Sally Field and the whole deal..."
>
>
>

For a period of time "Field" was used interchangeably with "Fields", and there is a minor on going jokey dispute between cast members as to the correct useage to this day.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Dark City Tarantis - Part 5

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Create a new combination eating utensils with chopsticks and knives, call them Knifesticks and put little pictures of our Hapless Heroes characters on them and market them thusly

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
Flyway to the Danger Zone

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
A Chiefly Executive Task

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Ketchup, Catch Up

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Find a small gender appropriate swimsuit put it on underneath whatever set of clothing you might be comfortable in prior to doing so you will want to write the name of our podcast on/about your body you're going to save your money for one calendar year. You are going to purchase a ticket for the Super Bowl when the Bills are in the Super Bowl next year. You're going to go down to the sideline and very nicely make friends with the security guard, get him to maybe take a picture of something the opposite direction, ditch your clothes, sprint onto the field. There will be children watching, hence the swimsuit, who don't want you full nude, and run around with Hapless Heroes at the Super Bowl that the Bills are playing at.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
A Fin in Time - Part 14 - Hamstorcism

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

For crying out loud, will you make Tommy Lee Jones some nachos

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
The Master Will Be Displeased - Part 1

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Go in search of a rare and powerful artifact. I'm talking you know the most powerful that you can possibly find. Search every corner of the globe for unexplored ruins that hold artifacts of untold power. Find an artifact of untold power and use its power to become the most awesome powerful unstoppable wizard the world has ever seen. With this power that the world cannot do anything to stop, you will instruct each and every human being on Earth to listen to the Hapless Heroes Podcast

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
The New Interns - Part 1

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

### **The Field Vs. Fields Controversy**

Typically an IYRLU would begin with:

> "...and if you like us, right now, you love us Sally Field and the whole deal..."
>
>
>

For a period of time "Field" was used interchangeably with "Fields", and there is a minor on going jokey dispute between cast members as to the correct useage to this day.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Fetch Me a Gigantic Check

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].