recursal/Fanatic-Fandom huggingface dataset:
The Frozen Ghost (1945) (Song)

This song is played during airings of The Frozen Ghost. Featuring Svengoolie and Doug Graves, this song is a parody of Take Me Out to the Ball Game by Jack Norworth and Albert Von Tilzer.

## Lyrics

Take me out to the broadcast

Choose a stooge from the crowd

Find me some free nut who'll wisecrack talk

I don't care if he's too drunk to walk

They all hoot, hoot, hoot at the heckler

If he drops dead, it's a shame

Cuz it's fun—to—see that he's out

And Gregor's to blame!

Take me out to the Waxworks

Say, "Hey!" to Madame Monet.

Find Cleopatra and Genghis Khan

And that cute niece the guys hit upon

It's such ruthless truth that when Gregor

Reads Valerie's mind, trouble came

Cuz it's for—sure—she hit the floor

And it seems the same!

Take a look at the furnace

While Gregor's steaming at Grant,

Who might accuse him of criminal acts

Rudy'd just like to give him some wax

Cuz it's Rude, Rude Rudy who's moping

And hoping Gregor to frame

Wants no one—to—see that this dummy's

His old boss dame!
The Invisible Man (Song)

This song is played during broadcasts of The Invisible Man (1933). It's not been recorded or assumed what it is a parody of. It features Svengoolie, Doug Graves, and Anita X. Orcist.

The video and lyrics here are taken from the November 2nd, 2019 broadcast. If another song for the movie is discovered, it will be incorporated into this page. A review of the March 29th, 2014 broadcast showed no song played during that version.

Update: Another version has indeed been found. The original version is a parody of Stand by Your Man by Tammy Wynette.

## Video

Alternate uploads can be found here and here.

Can't Find Your Man (the *original* song)

## Lyrics

### Original lyrics

Sometimes it's hard to stand the woman

Even when she's shoved by some strange man

Some bad things happen

When he's unwrappin'

Causin' things to cause pain when they land

But tho he shoves them, she still loves him

Even tho he does such horrid things

Cuz, as the saying goes,

When he loses his nose

An invisible angel gets his wings

Can't find your man

N'less there's two arms to aim for

Forget what he's to blame for

When nights are cold and lonely

Can't find your man

Unless he hits the bottle

He'll throttle any cop he can

Can't find your man

Can't find your man

He'll show those dumb carousers

But when he drops his trousers, ma'am

**BAY-BAY!**

Can't find your man

### MeTV version

*When you love a guy you can't see*

*You can never tell where he'll be*

*Anywhere he goes If it storms or snows*

*You can't really tell if it's he!*

*All around you he can run rings*

*And he does such horrible things*

*Cuz the saying goes*

*When he'll lose his nose*

*An invisible angel gets wings!*

*Mr. Griffin*

*Even if'n*

*We can't tell where you are*

*You must be a lawyer cuz*

*We know you passed the bar!*

*When you've got a guy you can't see*

*He may cause a ruckus or three*

*He can make a splash*

*As his room he'll trash*

*And'll be "two-tired" to flee!*

*When he goes to his buddy Kemp*

*It's enough to make him verklempt*

*It's for sure no shocker*

*He's off his rocker*

*From sanity he's exempt!*

*While his true love, Flora, despairs*

*To evict him the innkeeper dares*

*And he's booked the night*

*For the next flight*

*And I mean down that flight of stairs!*

*Meeting an invisible man*

*Just makes 'em all turn tail*

*I'd run too, if it means you*

*Won't have to hear her wail!*

*When he hits the bottle he'll stop*

*And he'll pause to throttle a cop*

*Cuz when he's around*

*And the temperature's down*

*It'll cause his trousers to drop!*

## Thanks

Lyrics transcribed by BronyNumber4096 on Youtube.
The Curse of the Werewolf (1961)

In eighteenth-century Spain, an adopted boy becomes a werewolf and terrorizes the inhabitants of his town.

**Released:** 1961

**Director(s):** Terence Fisher

**Writer(s):** Anthony Hinds (screenplay), Guy Endore (novel "The Werewolf of Paris")

**Stars:** Clifford Evans, Oliver Reed, Yvonne Romain

**IMDB:** 6.5/10

**Sven Promo:** Official Site

## Bumpers

This movie is generally very short on additional skits when broadcasted, due to not being able to cut much more out of its 90+ minute runtime. Up through the March 4th, 2023 broadcast, the same short bumpers for the movie have been reused. The only real differences have been the quality of the movie, updated mailbag contents (with the same Seinfeld puffy shirt joke), and the like. The same "Oliver Reed" joke was reused in old and new intros for the show as well.

The 2023 2.5 hour broadcast of this movie padded most of its additional time with more commercials, Spawn of Svengoolie submissions, and some old Kerwyn's Corner clips.

## Song

There is no song for this film specifically, though Werewolf of Washington (1973) (Song) has been played during the broadcast at times. Other times, no song is performed.

## Door Gag

**2011:**
"Sven, I'll tell ya. Those airlines just keep getting cheaper and cheaper."

"Oh, sure"

"I took a small airline's plane here and the stewardess asks me 'would you like dinner?' I ask 'what are the choices?' She says 'yes or no.'"

**2023:**

"Hey, Svengoolie. I just went on my first airplane ride in over 60 years!"

"Wow!"

"Things are so different now. In fact, the last time I flew the propeller in front. And you know why it had that propeller in front?"

"Yeah, I think so."

"Well, it was just a big fan to keep the pilot cool."

"I don't think that's right."

"Oh no? Then how come if it stops, the pilot starts sweating?"

## Final Gag

**2011:**
This program has not been evaluated by the EPA and may be harmful to small woodland creatures.

**2023:**

It is sad that werewolves get such a bad rap. After all, they are people too - most of the time!

## Broadcast History

Below are all of the indexed broadcasts of **The Curse of the Werewolf (1961)**.

### Svengoolie

October 29th, 2011 - (MeTV run premiere)

November 3rd, 2012 - Blog post

February 16th, 2013 - Blog post

August 24th, 2013 - Blog post

June 21st, 2014 - Blog post

August 22nd, 2015 - Blog post

April 15th, 2017 - Blog post

June 13th, 2020 - Blog post (Updated with a new HD print of the film)

March 4th, 2023 - Blog post (new copyright)

## Related Links

-Wikipedia entry

-Chris Hamby's blog entry for a broadcast
Zombie's OCs

## Who Are Zombie's OCs?

Zombie's OCS were created with the help of his other OC Beta Dave. But he sees Beta Dave as more of a counterpart than an OC. But besides that, Zombie has created these OCS to help him on missions, and most of these OCS have done either a good or a horrible job at their task.

## Members

IndiumFlower PotMilkCranberryZero\_OneSkauchIce CubeCG5 CoinChalkPink BubblegumRed BubblegumGreen BubblegumBlue BubblegumYellow BubblegumOrange BubblegumPurple BubblegumMayonnaisePlungerWooden SignBreadCoffeePillLightbulbKetamineAirpodDan Bull
Svengoolie Wiki

The goal for the main Svengoolie show is to have each broadcast and its associated skits documented. Do you want to find the lyrics for a song Sven and Doug played, along with what the song was parodying? We want your destination and source to be here. What about the source of that audio drop Sven uses? Yep, that too!
We are currently editing
244
articles since December 24th, 2022.

-New template to make adding new Svengoolie broadcasts easier for contributors! (03/05/2023)

-Svengoolie February 2023 Newsletter (02/01/2023)

-Svengoolie January 2023 Newsletter (01/01/2023)

-Svengoolie to be expanded to 2.5 hours in 2023 (12/14/2022)

-Toynk.com Brings Exclusive Svengoolie® Collector’s Pin Set to Life (12/06/22)

-Svengoolie December 2022 Newsletter (12/01/2022)

That's right! There's a Svengoolie Discord now open for Svengoolie, Sventoonie, and Toon in with Me fans to congregate together! Join us now at discord.gg/YqpE9krYK9!

Also check out the r/Svengoolie Reddit!

12/09 - The Raven (1963)

12/16 - Night Walker (1964)

12/23 - The Black Cat (1934)

12/30 - The Undead (1957)

12/02 - Mystery of the Wax Museum (1933)

11/25 - House on Haunted Hill (1959)

06/03 - Man Made Monster (1941)

05/27 - The Killer Shrews (1959)

05/20 - The Thing with Two Heads (1972)

05/13 - The Ghost and Mr. Chicken (1966)

Season 2 has finished with episode 18 Sventoonie's Got Character!. More news when we get it!

02/25 - Sventoonie's Got Character!
02/18 - Slightly Later With Sventoonie

02/11 - The Great British Faking Show

02/04 - Puke of Earl
The Mole People (1956)

A party of archaeologists discovers the remnants of a mutant five-millennia-old Sumerian civilization living beneath a glacier atop a mountain in Mesopotamia.

**Released:** 1956

**Director(s):** Virgil W. Vogel

**Writer(s):** László Görög

**Stars:** John Agar, Cynthia Patrick, Hugh Beaumont

**IMDB:** 5.0/10

## Bumpers

An interview with Lance Henriksen from a Flashback Weekend interview is shown. Jennifer's Body is discussed, along with Lance keeping busy with roles, his book Not Bad for a Human, butting heads with David Letterman, and making pottery.

A quick Molegers coffee ad, a parody of the American coffee brand Folgers.

"Leave it to Mole," a quick "Leave it to Beaver" spoof, has been broadcasted typically for every airing of this movie.

## Door Gag

"Sven, I'm in so much trouble!"

"Why, what's wrong?"

"I work in my company's employee office and we had a prospective employee come in applying for a position. I looked at his resume and say 'I see there is a 7 year gap since your last job. What happened there?' And the guy says 'Oh, I went to Yale.'

"I said, 'Oh, that's great. In that case, you're hired'!

"And he said, 'Hooray, I finally got a yob!'"

## Final Gag

Confucius say "With many holes comes many moles!" (2011 version)

With many holes comes many moles - Confucius (Modern version)

## Broadcast History

Below are all of the indexed broadcasts of **The Mole People (1956)**.

### Svengoolie

October 8th, 2011

March 24th, 2012

September 22nd, 2012

April 13th, 2013

January 18th, 2014 - Blog post

June 9th, 2018 - Blog post

February 15th, 2020 - Blog post/Reddit

April 22nd, 2023 - Blog post/Reddit (2.5 hours, lots of Spawn Stars padding)

### Son of Svengoolie

February 14th, 1981

May 21st, 1983

July 27th, 1985

## Related Links

-Wikipedia entry

-Chris Hamby's blog entry
Godzilla (1998) (Song)

This song is played during airings of Godzilla (1998). This song features Svengoolie and Doug Graves and is a parody of "Turning Japanese" by The Vapors. The song, with the chorus featuring the line "This movie isn't Japanese," mocks how different the American made Godzilla movie is compared to its Toho counterparts.

## Lyrics

I saw this picture and I predict you're not liking this new modern version as well

Ask the director "who's the protector?" of the original lizard we love well

Although he's burning up and knocking down and coming up and stepping down

This isn't Japanese

This movie isn't Japanese

It's not from Toho

It's not Japanese

It's an American release

That stars this yo-yo

I would beg you please

Godzilla should be Japanese

If things were equal

Everybody sees

This movie isn't Japanese

There'll be no sequel

Did they just wanna

Have an iguana

Whose flaming breath is like a barbecue cough

That's my aversion

To this new version

Of a New York Ferris Bueller's Day Off

They've got him coming in and chowing down and looking up and locking down

But it's not Japanese

Godzilla isn't Japanese

He's more Jurrasic

Got em on their knees

But this film isn't Japanese

He's blocking traffic!

Tho there was a tease,

This movie isn't Japanese

Not even Asian

Everyone agrees

This movie isn't Japanese

It's all Caucasian

No grins no fins no dubbed in voices no rubber suits and where are all the toy tanks?

Everyone's a bit actor you always glimpse em

Half the people in this have worked on The Simpsons -- Excellent!

But this film isn't Japanese

Godzilla fans you can't appease

With an iguana

Turn 90 degrees

And gives us something Japanese

But you don't wanna

`Zilla's Japanese

And if not, why'd you pay the fees

To them at Toho

Everybody sees

Godzilla's always Japanese

No Gecko youth, bro (?)
Svengoolie Sven-tenial Song

This song was played during Sventenial: 100 Shows Special which aired Feb. 1, 1997. Featuring Svengoolie and Doug Graves, tI don't know what song this is parodying. But, as of this writing, the 100 Show special is still on YouTube, so if anyone can help with the original song and artist?

## Lyrics

Transylvania 6-5000

C.H.U.D.s and Beast of Hollow Mountain

Four Skulls, Enemy from Space

Faceless Man who had no face (*duh*)

Wavelength, Twonky, U.F.O.

And Angel ran on this show

Brain That Wouldn't Die's a head

And Slugs, Night of the Living Dead

Vampire, Children of the Corn

Prom Night 3 was almost porn

Logan's Run, and just for fun

It Happened at the World's Fair

(Lemmee get some air.)

Kids in Village of the Damned

In Motel Hell the actor's ham

House, House 2, The Brain and Bat

Beastmaster who had a cat

Pharaoh's Curse, and even worse

The one with Mickey Rooney

Killer Shrews

And Stuff that liked to ooze

The Black Sleep made us snooze

And so did those Space Killers and Godzilla

Ed Wood's Plan

The Neanderthal Man

And the Voodoo Island

And Nights of Ghouls and Lepus couldn't keep us ALL AWAKE!

Superbeast, Theater of Blood

The Long, Long Trailer's stuck in mud

Red Planet Mars and Devil Girl

Re-Animator made me hurl

Prehistoric Planet girls

And Beach Girls and the Stooges

Robot Monster, Santa Claus

The Leeches and Devil Dog paws

Forbidden Planet, Arous brain

Dracula returns again

The Trilogy of Terror

And, unless I made an error,

Frogtown

(56 down) (*Come on, Sven. You can do it!*)

Planet X

Night Strangler grabbing necks

The Unknown's bad effects

Revenge of Zombies, OH!

The Black Widow

Terror creeps

Magnetic Monster beeps

Cult of the Cobra's jeeps

Doctor Blood's Coffin

We showed way too often

(What's still left???)

William Shatner's Spider Kingdom

Spiders went where he had flinged 'em

Philly X? I guess that meant

Philidelphia Experiment

Plus Commando Cody

Super Chicken and Flash Gordon

Brisbane Brothers, Eagle Man

If anyone can, O'Connor can!

Bob Villa Empire Crazy Glue

"I've got something for you!"

Those are sponsors, my mistake

And now here's a commercial break!

Ooooohhh, that was a lotta links.
Horror of Dracula (1958) (Song)

This song is played during MeTV airings of Horror of Dracula. Featuring Svengoolie and Doug Graves, this song is a parody of Makin' Whoopee by Gus Kahn and Walter Donaldson.

## Lyrics

Bit Harker's neck, it made him squirm

But now she needs some Plexaderm®

I might as well sing,

Cuz now Van Helsing

Is staking Lucy.

Tossed garlic out. The smell's obscene

It looks like Drac could use Visine®

She was encrypted

Till that sharp tip did

Make the stake juicy.

Since Drac attacked poor Lucy,

The cross had left her fried.

Drac never tossed a bouquet

He simply tossed his bride.

Thought she was dead, but she was bit.

Now don't trust her to babysit® (*Oh, wait... this doesn't need the "R."*)

Because she's dental

You can't be gentle

When staking Lucy.
Abbott and Costello Meet the Invisible Man (1951)

Two bumbling private eyes help a man, wrongly accused of murder who has become invisible, to clear his name.

**Released:** 1951

**Director:** Charles Lamont

**Writers:** Hugh Wedlock Jr (story), Howard Snyder (story), Robert Lees (screenplay)

**Stars:** Bud Abbott, Lou Costello, Nancy Guild

**IMDB:** 6.6/10

**Sven Promo:** Official Site

## Bumpers

After Abbott sees the Invisible Man disrobe, Sven butts in with "Oh, that must be where they got the idea for that sign I saw at the dry cleaners. Drop your pants here for quick service."

Then we get a Special Svengoolie Stocking Stuffer! That means it's some classic clips!

Since it's so close to Christmas, Sven thinks it's a good idea to trim his tree.

Shecky Sleighbells, standup comic, beats Sven with a yule log while they exchange some Christmas jokes about.

Sven comes back from break with an "Invisible Mastercard" joke about your money disappearing.

Sven heads to break with a joke about income taxes being based on Abbott and Costello.

"Big Bucks" Goolie brings us back.

Sven serves up some production and cast history for the movie.

Sven runs his campaign ad for the office of State Rubber Chicken Inspector.

Sven teaches the kids how those fancy invisible man special effects were done.

A small joke about using too much starch and making your bath robe sit upright.

A quick joke about men not marrying flowers.

Kerwyn and Sven wishing you a merry Christmas from the show and Me-TV.

Sven reveals the phrase he's heard a million times on blind dates is "it's your looks I'm worried about."

Sven gives us a riddle to figure out. "What has a black mustache, a black hat and is a big pain in the neck?"

Kerwyn and Sven do some mail call.

Sven tells us about his new Broadway musical "The Sound of Mucus."

Sven is asked to "put on a dress and jump overboard." He asks his mom and is given permission.

Sven lets us know the station has hired a security guard to protect him at his public appearances. The cut implies the guard hopes his mother doesn't see him.

## Song

The song normally played with this broadcast can be found here. For the December 21st, 2013 broadcast, a Christmas Medley was played instead.

## Door Gag

"Hey Mr. Sven, did you hear the invisible man married the invisible woman and they had kids?"

"No, really?"

"Yeah, the couple became transparents!"

"Ha-ha... but they actually had children?"

"Yep, the invisible man and the invisible woman had children but... between you and me, those kids weren't much to see!"

## Final Gag

*It's late, do you know where your invisible kids are?*

## Broadcast History

Below are all of the indexed broadcasts of Abbott and Costello Meet the Invisible Man.

### Svengoolie

April 7th, 2007

May 28th, 2011 (Me-TV run premiere)

December 21st, 2013 - Blog post (with Special Svengoolie Stocking Stuffer holiday clips)

January 17th, 2015 - Blog post

April 1st, 2017 - Blog post

December 24th, 2022 - Blog post

### Son of Svengoolie

This movie never aired during Son of Svengoolie.
The Night Stalker (1972) (Song)

This song is played during MeTV airings of The Night Stalker. Featuring Svengoolie, Doug Graves and Anita X. Orcist, WHAT IS THE ORIGINAL SONG????

## Lyrics

Things are big in Vegas where some murders aren't explained

Where bodies have remained

And all their blood was drained

That's the fact that Kolchak thinks has caused them to expire

The suspect that they require

Is a vampire

Sally down some alley and get grabbed below your chin

A fiend might do you in

That's no recycle bin

Might they become frightened when the killer then returns

For answers each cop yearns

But they won't ask Major Burns

Carl Kolchak gets a snarl from Tony

When vampires he mentions

Authorities try to put the squeeze on him

When they see his intentions

It was bizarre by the lady's car

Released a dog to avoid bloodshed

But old red eyes hated that surprise

Made him roll over and play dead

Drainy old Skorzeny knew his blood bank raid was done

Can't stop him with a gun

He hates to drink and run

He just hits the blood bank when there's no victim to munch

He'll grab a liquid lunch

And finish with some punch

(Anita)

It's a fact that Kolchak knew the vampire's last resorts

Cuz some dipstick reports

She's down a dozen quarts

Losing by transfusion, I'd avoid that as a rule

Rather than fight this ghoul

I would choose this other pool
Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein (1948) (Song)

This song is still being performed on the show during airings of Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein. Featuring Sven and Doug, this song is a parody of Skip to My Lou.

## Lyrics

Slap your partner, like Bud and Lou

Why can't monsters skip Bud and Lou?

Fuzzy fellow knows what to do:

Grip Bud and Lou while snarling

Guy's gunna flutter and go peek through

Why didn't anyone think it's true?

Why shouldn't Talbot be in the zoo?

Give Bud and Lou some garlic

Stand by walls that go take a spin

Stand by a box that Dracula's in

Land by her and hope that you win

A batty love connection

Bud and Lou are no guys to hire

Who's on first when it moves with a fire

Who forgot that a vampire

Shouldn't have a reflection?

Act more funny and try to scare

Larry Talbot keeps growing hair

Think the monster's an easy chair

Pick Bud and Lou for harming

Blond with insurance guy smells a rat

Dracula's getting his turn at "bat"

It's not just their customers that

Find Bud and Lou alarming
King Kong vs. Godzilla (1962) (Song)

This song is played during MeTV airings of King Kong vs. Godzilla. Featuring Svengoolie and Doug Graves, this song is a parody of "Luna mezz'o mare"

## Lyrics

Lazy monkey will you get up! He's comatose and rather hairy.

Thank the bums who are on the drums and made the juice from the berry.

Something's mean to the submarine and it might mean that all is lost.

It's not nice. It was bad advice to put the iceberg on "defrost!"

Godzilla! Trying to catch the train is wrong.

Godzilla! Put the burn on ol' King Kong.

Godzilla! Was a bad example for these folks.

They don't realize that these two guys are really jokes.

They're thinking breathing fire is cool, so now they hit the smokes!

That King Kong, he first showed up while these two fools are on safari.

Facehugger from Alien will get turned to calamari.

Godzilla heads to Tokyo you know the military has fits.

Be discreet. Plan your retreat, cuz your defense is the pits!

Godzilla! Are you and King Kong in cahoots?

Godzilla! You're both guys in monster suits.

Godzilla! It's for ratings this guy roots.

You two are wrestling and put on the Camel Clutch.

Does stop-motion animation really cost too much?
Halloween (1978) (Song)

This song used to play during airings of Halloween. Featuring Svengoolie and Doug Graves, this song is a parody of Bang the Drum All Day by Todd Rundgren.

## Lyrics

I don't wanna trick, I wanna use Halloween to slay!

I don't wanna treat, I just wanna use Halloween to slay!

Ever since I was a little kid and saw her boyfriend and Sis do what they did!

I was upset that she was a tart, so I picked up a knife, stuck it in my sister's heart!

I don't trick or treat, I wanna use Halloween to slay! (**YASS! I DO!**)

I don't hit the street, I just wanna use Halloween to slay!

Ever since I left the prison yard, I'm being chased by a guy with hair like Picard!

This stinkin' mask makes it hard to see, but I keep movin' on cuz I'm after Jamie Lee!

I don't trick or treat, I wanna use Halloween to slay!

I'm in the back seat, I just wanna use Halloween to slay!

I've got a reason for the things I do. I think the first reason is I HATE SCOOBY-DOO!

But the main reason that I do this crime is cuz I'm sick of the morons who think that I'm a mime!

I don't trick or treat, I wanna use Halloween to slay!

I don't give a "sheet," I just wanna use Halloween to slay!

(*repeat these last two lines to the end*)
War of the Gargantuas (1966)

An experimental lab animal called a gargantua escapes from his captors and is suspected to be the creature that is killing people all over the countryside. But when the gargantua from the lab appears at the same time as the evil gargantua, the two begin to battle across Japan.

**Released:** 1966

**Directors:** Ishirô Honda

**Writers:** Reuben Bercovitch(story), Ishirô Honda, Takeshi Kimura

**Stars:** Russ Tamblyn, Kumi Mizuno, Kenji Sahara

**IMDB:** 6.2/10

**Sven Promo:** Official Site

## Song

The song that normally plays during the broadcast can be found here.

## Final Gag

So that completes your order of two gargantuas and one colossal boob. We hope you are satisfied!

## Broadcast History

Below are all of the indexed broadcasts of **War of the Gargantuas (1966)**.

### Svengoolie

February 25th, 2023 -Blog post (MeTV run premiere)

## Related Links

-Wikipedia entry

-Chris Hamby's blog entry for the first broadcast

-r/Svengoolie discussion for first broadcast
The Old Dark House (1963)

An American car salesman in London becomes mixed up in a series of fatal occurrences at a secluded mansion.

**Released:** 1963

**Director(s):** William Castle

**Writer(s):** Robert Dillon, J.B. Priestley

**Stars:** Tom Poston, Robert Morley, Janette Scott

**IMDB:** 5.4/10

## Song

The song that normally plays can be found here.

## Broadcast History

Below are all of the indexed broadcasts of **The Old Dark House (1963)**.

### Svengoolie

January 18, 2020 - Blog post (MeTV broadcast premiere)

## Related Links

-Wikipedia entry

-Hamby's blog entry for the movie
Earth vs. the Spider (1958) (Song)

"Earth vs. the Spider" is a parody of "Itsy Bitsy Spider," a popular nursery rhyme, with a Latin spin. The song is performed by Svengoolie and Doug Graves for the film broadcast of Earth vs. the Spider (1958) and features some sick trumpet action by Doug.

## Video

An alternative lower quality upload can be found here.

## Lyrics

*The lone, overgrown spider blocked Carol's father's route*

*And then it drained her poor dad's fluids out*

*Up came the pest guys with some DDT*

*But the lone, overgrown spider did in the deputy*

*The hairy, scary spider displayed in the school gym*

*They ducked it's leg but it clobbered him*

*Up struck the band and, though it's not their fault,*

*Guess the hairy, scary spider would rather hear a waltz*

*The lone, overgrown spider came bursting through the wall*

*He should repay Fred Ziffel for the call*

*Out in the street, the spider did advance*

*And he taught this gal a lesson, next time she'll wear pants*

*The hairy, scary spider makes work crowd traffic crash*

*It bugs his wife, so Kingman hits the gas*

*Then he foots off and his car in neglect*

*And the hairy, scary spider ruins the special effects*
Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster (1965) (Song)

This song is played during MeTV airings of Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster. Featuring Svengoolie and Doug Graves, this song is a parody of Sweet Georgia Brown (aka: The Harlem Globetrotters' Theme).

This song holds a special place in my heart because this was the first episode of Svengoolie I had ever watched. This was the first of his parodies I had ever heard, and this was the beginning of my obsession with Sven's song parodies.

## Lyrics

There's a mess caused by, I guess, Princess Marcuzan.

They left planet Mars, and now it's ours they landed upon.

Won't hesitate to seal the fate of this poor moron.

They came to the beach

To pick a nice peach.

These guys' missions: Find additions to their breeding stock.

These girl hoarders take their orders from this bald Spock.

What's certain for each femme is it's curtains for all of them.

Show your bikini to that meanie,

That Marcuzan.

That blast he got changed astronaut into a Frankenstein.

Sure, he had flaws like pressing "pause," which was a bad sign.

Dr. Steele must try to heal the glitch in design

Thanks to jerks from Mars.

He hates guys with cars.

Meanwhile, scouts have singled out what they're looking for.

Yeah, they all thought it was a casting call for The Bachelor.

Bring our hero back.

We'll return his brain to RadioShack.

I can't ignore this.

He's no Boris, (*Boris? He ain't even Fred Gwynne!*)

This Frankenstein.
Pizza Bagel

**Under Construction**
***Go do something else while you wait will ya?*** - Coffee

This page is currently being worked on and is not yet complete...

## About

Pizza Bagel can have a few anger issues here and there. He can be a bit of an asshole to some people as well. But besides that, he tries his best to become a better person.

## Trivia

* Zombie describes Pizza Bagel as "Every average adullt object show character"
* Pizza Bagel is Lactose Intolerant(there is no explanation on how he's still alive)
The Raven (1963) (Song)

There are actually two different songs Rich Koz aka Svengoolie has done for The Raven (1963)! The first one is a parody of "Centerfold" by The J. Geils Band and premiered first in Svengoolie's WCIU ("The U") run prior to MeTV. The second premiered on January 7th, 2023 during his MeTV run and is a parody of "American Patrol" by Frank White Meacham. Both songs are performed by Svengoolie and Doug Graves for the film broadcast of The Raven (1963).

Song of the same jokes were reused in the second version of the song.

## Video

Original song from WCIU ("The U") broadcast

Second song from MeTV broadcast

An alternative lower quality upload of the second song can be found here.

## Images

Original version from WCIU ("The U") broadcast

Second version from MeTV broadcast

## Lyrics

### Original Song

*Does he 'bawk'? Does he squawk? Can he flap his wings?*

*It's awful when an actor has to put up with such things*

*He used to star in pictures where he tempted Bogart's wrath*

*But now he's better suited to appear in a birdbath*

*The years went by since in the Maltese Falcon he was heard*

*But now he's in The Raven and he finally got the "bird"*

*It's just no good*

*That his career is where it stood*

*His bod looks like a raven's would (Bod looks like a raven's would)*

*It's all so bleak*

*His Oscar chances just got weak*

*He's talking through a raven's beak*

*It's okay! We understand*

*It's still a perfect part to land*

*A film with Vince and Boris in*

*And this hot chick who shows some skin*

*In a jam? Yes, you were*

*Cuz Boris' wrath you did incur*

*Don't leave deposits on his sleeve*

*Hey Pete, wanna cracker?*

*That beak of yours so gently sipped*

*A potion that had hair that's clipped*

*Oh no! If you stay as you are*

*You would hang around a "crow bar"*

*Don't know how*

*But Boris now should take a bow*

*Cuz Vincent is a statue now (Vincent is a statue now)*

*It's all bad luck*

*You got the bird he should have ducked*

*Since you're now like a raven plucked (Now you're like a raven plucked)*

### MeTV Version

*He could sqawk that he had to bock and even flap his wings*

*It's awful Pete Lorre had to put up with such things*

*He once appeared in pictures where he'd incur Bogart's wrath*

*But now he's better suited to appear in a bird bath*

*In films like Maltese Falcon, he once was seen and heard*

*But now he's in The Raven and he just gives them the bird*

*A potion sip, with hair they clip, left you as you are*

*You're only suitable to hang out at a crow bar*

*What a film*

*Those guys are in*

*And the raven has a chick*

*Who's going to show some skin*

*But who'd forecast that having a blast with Boris isn't fun*

*Or you might get here's Johnny'd by Jack Nicholson*

*And Vincent is a statue now, that's so hard to believe*

*Just be careful you don't leave deposits on his sleeve*

## Thanks

Lyrics for the original song transcribed by BronyNumber4096 on Youtube.
Sventennial: 100 Shows, 1995-1997 (1997)

A collection of skits and songs from the first two years of Svengoolie's [WCIU] run that began his long-running revival. Also featured is a little bit of history about the show.

## Song

Multiple excerpts from different songs were played, including a medley featuring a list of the movies broadcasted on the show.

Slugs (1988) (Song), a parody of The B-52's "Love Shack".

A reworked clip of Bette Midler and her Harlettes singing a song on the original Svengoolie series was shown. Also in the lineup was Melissa Manchester and possibly Katey Segal (uncofirmed but was in the Harlettes, so possibly!).

Also broadcasted was Kingdom of the Spiders (1977) (Song), which featured a bump of jokes about William Shatner's roles.

## Final Gag

Svengoolie is a fictional character, any resemblance to an actual Goolie living or undead is purely unbelievable and even silly. Don't try this at home! Svengoolie does not walk and talk by himself.

## Broadcast History

Below are all of the indexed broadcasts of **Sventennial: 100 Shows, 1995-1997 (1997)**.
Cereal

**Under Construction**
***Go do something else while you wait will ya?*** - Coffee

This page is currently being worked on and is not yet complete...

## About

Cereal is the nicest and the smartest in The Beta Squad. She was created by Smart Fridge and was told by Hominy to assist Smart Fridge. She later gets a upgrade from Hominy so she can send people to her very own Prison.

## Abilities

* Extra Two Limbs(she hides them and only uses them for emergency purposes)
* She uses cereal marshmallows to teleport people into her hidden prison.

## Trivia

* Cereal takes more care of Smart Fridge than Bagel
The Abominable Dr. Phibes (1971) (Song)

This song plays during the MeTV airings of The Abominable Dr. Phibes. Featuring Svengoolie and Doug Graves, this song is a parody of "Old MacDonald Had a Farm."

## Lyrics

Anton Phibes will do some harm to all those he owes

He'll do that harm helped by this chick once he picks his nose

With a flip-flip here

And a wing thing there

They'll encroach

On your poached

Eggs and you will be toast

Anton Phibes will do some harm. This way they'll die so

Checking on his enemy list, who'll be next to go?

Just watch him plug his Bluetooth in, then he starts the show

While his flick chick's out

Playing Walk-the-Dog

Does a task

With a mask

Then he's gunna croak a frog

End each life

Since he lost his wife

Kill each participant

With no organ transplant

Anton Phibes will do more harm, but needs refueling, though

It is Phibes who cause alarm, tho they have their doubts

Wonder what he's cooking up with those Brussel sprouts

First a squeak-squeak here

From the rats like these

Makes him feel

That for real

He's such a big cheese

Hailstorm here

Causing low degrees

Now he's dead

Cuz Egghead

Thinks he's Mr. Freeze

Bottles here

And there's a bunch

I don't need to tell ya that it sure isn't Hawaiian Punch

Anton Phibes will do some harm each time he horns in
Orange

**Under Construction**
***Go do something else while you wait will ya?*** - Coffee

This page is currently being worked on and is not yet complete...

## About

Orange is a virtual newsreader that has his own company by the name of Orange Studios. I don't have much info of him for now.

## Trivia

* Orange is the oldest Beta Objects character. Being created in 2014
* Orange used to be Froggy's Sona.
* Orange used to be a orange human oc. But ever since Froggy joined the OSC, he was changed into a sentient Orange character.
Toilet Paper

**Under Construction**
***Go do something else while you wait will ya?*** - Coffee

This page is currently being worked on and is not yet complete...

## About

Toilet Paper's main job is to clean shit. But He joined GMOF to get away of his weird shit problems. Toilet Paper and Blob are very close friends and love to steal stuff together.

## Trivia

* Toilet Paper is the youngest competitor in the show
* He's the one that invited Blob in the show.
Indium

**Under Construction**
***Go do something else while you wait will ya?*** - Coffee

This page is currently being worked on and is not yet complete...

## About

Indium is a pretty encouraging person, but he can get bothered pretty easily. Indium was created when Zombie was making a movie called “The Periodic Table Movie”. The movie was later canceled and Zombie decided to keep Indium since he was the only one that had a personality. Zombie later decides to make him his first Invincible OC. Indium’s only useful power is his limb stretching ability.

## Abilities

* Streching his limbs
* Invincible

## Trivia

* Indium is scared of Pigeons
* Indium loves to cook most of the time for Zombie’s OCs
* Indium has an obsessive-compulsive disorder(OCD)
Phone

**Under Construction**
***Go do something else while you wait will ya?*** - Coffee

This page is currently being worked on and is not yet complete...

* Main
* Alt

## About

I don’t want to share much information about Phone to avoid spoilers. But all I can say is that he was created by Hominy.

## Abilities

* Voice Changer
* Very Strong Protection
* A Lot Of Strength
* Jump Boost

## Trivia

* Phone was hugely inspired by a lot of Splatter Films
Cookie

**Under Construction**
***Go do something else while you wait will ya?*** - Coffee

This page is currently being worked on and is not yet complete...

## About

Cookie is a very chill person and tries her best to meet new friends on the show. Shes close friends with A11, Butter, and Basil.

## Trivia

* Cookie is A11's Second Favorite Contestant
Wooden Sign

## About

Wooden Sign has come a long way since he was first created. He used to be quite closed off and didn't engage with Zombie's OCs. However, he has since changed in a big way. He is now much more open and willing to learn from his friends. He has become quite the sponge for knowledge, always eager to absorb new skills and techniques.

One of the most significant changes in Wooden Sign's behavior has been his willingness to be more social. He used to be quite the loner, spending much of his time in his room playing guitar or drawing. But with the help of Purple Bubblegum, he has started to reach out to others and connect with them in meaningful ways. He has even gone so far as to blog about his experiences and share his thoughts and feelings with his Friends.

Overall, Wooden Sign's transformation has been nothing short of remarkable. He has gone from a shy and withdrawn individual to a confident and outgoing person. He has learned so much from his friends and has made many meaningful connections along the way. With his newfound skills and confidence, there is no telling what he will accomplish in the future.

## Trivia

* Wooden Sign's design was based of the Geometry Dash wooden sign
Pill

## About

Pill is a peculiar individual with a mysterious aura surrounding him. His enigmatic smile often leaves people wondering what he's thinking.  Unfortunately, someone with such a unique persona would choose to use it for negative purposes. He has a reputation for being cruel to others, which is concerning. Lucky for him, Pill has been striving to become a better person and supervisor by practicing kindness and providing a safe environment for others. He empathizes with people by taking on their issues as if they were his own, despite feeling no emotions or pain himself. He has hurt himself over a hundred times in the process. All of this work has paid off in the form of improved relationships with his users. They appreciate the care and attention he puts into every interaction, and they know they can rely on him to be there when they need him. Pill may be an asshole, but he's also a valuable member, and he's committed to doing everything he can to make sure that Zombie's OCs are safe, supportive, and caring. But it can also be a bad thing for Him.

You see. Pill is the first OC created using a virus known as The OT Virus. However, Zombie is keeping the truth about his virus a secret and instead convinces others that Pill is an alien. When Pill is injured, he transforms into an evil and powerful being, Exposing his White limbs. He becomes mentally unstable and desperately searches for something to eat to restore himself to his normal state. He will eat basically anything as long as it's edible. As his injuries worsen, his behavior becomes increasingly erratic and unsettling.

During his spare time, Pill spends most of his day sitting in the living room, watching TV.

## Abilities

* Fire immune or any toxic crap
* Flying(when in Damaged Form)
* Limb Generation(when damaged)
* Infect anyone with the OT Virus when damaged(turning their victim into a bizzare creature)

## Trivia

* Pill used to be a co-host in a camp
* Pill has competed in a camp named WALL(he placed 3rd)
* Pill is Bisexual
* Pill likes Onions
* Pill hates red chairs
* Pill’s human name is Oliver
* Pill can get pretty mad easily
* Pill’s Birthday is in June 29
* Pill’s favorite color is Pink
The Beach Girls and the Monster (1965) (Song)

This song was played during airings of The Beach Girls and the Monster. This song is actually a parody of *three* songs, all by Frank Sinatra. The songs (in order) are "Come Fly with Me," "My Kind of Town," and "My Way."

## Lyrics

Come die with me! Come die! Let's die today!

You oughta croak, cuz your stupid joke

Proves you're no Frugal Gourmet!

Come die with me! Come die! Let's die today!

Get wise with me! Get wise, and you will pay!

If you get wise with the surfer guys

They'll gouge out your eyes today!

Get wise with me and you'll die! You'll die today!

Be

Cause

It's

My kind of clown, the monster is

My kind of clown, the monster is

Some lame amphibian

And he can ruin your tan!

And each time he'll rise, the monster is

Poppin' his eyes! The monster needs

His thyroid rate taken down!

He's my kind of clown!

And now

In your career

It's time you faced

The facts now, Sonny!

My son,

I'll state my case:

You're a disgrace!

You won't make money!

The tunes

You gave these goons

Scrape ears like sand,

A rough and dry way!

So, grab your coat

And tunes you wrote

And hit the highway!

For what is my son

Flesh of my flesh

Whose tunes are worse

Than that John Tesh?

Your music stinks!

It chokes your throat!

Your sheepish songs

Just get my goat!

And like your old man,

You'll find I can-

Not hit the high note!
Cranberry

**Under Construction**
***Go do something else while you wait will ya?*** - Coffee

This page is currently being worked on and is not yet complete...

## About

Cranberry is one of the most despised OCS Zombie has made. Zombie describes Cranberry as a “turgid”. Cranberry was created when Zombie decided to make his very first smart OC to complete his school work. But instead of giving work advice, Cranberry will most often discuss about politics. Because of that, Zombie's OCs disliked Cranberry for that. Luckily, Zombie's OCs were starting to get used to him so Zombie decided to just keep him and not delete him. But Cranberry still has a lot of thoughts about himself and likes to share them privately with Zombie.

## Abilities

* Change his eyes into different art styles

## Trivia

* Cranberry is the smallest OC
* Cranberry likes ski masks
Abbott and Costello Meet the Mummy (1955) (Song)

This song is played during MeTV airings of Abbott and Costello Meet the Mummy. Featuring Svengoolie and Doug Graves, this song is a parody of the Twelfth Street Rag by Euday L. Bowman.

## Lyrics

Abbott and Costello are endangered by a fellow who's wrapped up in Egyptian rags.

Caught up in the mystery of lots of ancient history that's older than a lot of their gags.

Actions that embarrass could lead them all to Klaris who's been around 1,000 years,

They keep him alive with those Egyptian beers.

A mistake they're makin' when there's a selfie taken with somebody who's already dead.

They could be in jeopardy when somebody happens to see someone who's somebody had read.

This bad honey wants his money.

It's Lou's aim to put out her flame.

You don't need this corn.

Doug has got his horn,

And plays like the desert: HOT!

(*blow dah horn*)

No more dilly-dallyin', they want the medallion that'll make them rich they believe.

Caution is expedient, but a new ingredient in the burger might make you heave.

You need to remind 'em that Klaris is behind 'em and it'd be important to leave.

Goosebumps bristle, and you're too scared to whistle.

They need to escape the paws of the walking dead who thaws and avoid the criminal mob.

Bud and Lou find out there is no way to escape Klaris, guarded by Mel Cooley "Hey, Rob!"

He does a trick: The Nile Heimlich.

Since Freddy tried, he'll let him slide!
Crystal (Tribe)

> In Need of GrowthThis page is a short stub. You can help MetaZoo Wiki by expanding it.See more info about stubs and using this notice template. See other pages with this notice.

> *For all Pages with this Tribe, see Category: Crystal Tribe Pages.*

**Crystal** is a Tribe found on Beastie Pages. It first appeared on a Page from the set April Fools’ 2022: Magicast, and has not yet appeared in any subsequent sets.

## Description

The Crystal Tribe has appeared on only one Page so far, Chaos Crystal? (April Fools’ 2022: Magicast). A Neutral Page, it had the Convert Trait.

## History

The Crystal Tribe first appeared on a Page in the first holiday release, known as April Fools’ 2022: Magicast. So far, the only Page with this Tribe appeared solely in this set, and it is unclear if any future sets will feature additional Pages with this Tribe.

## References

Pages. *MetaZoo Play Network*. MetaZoo Games LLC. Accessed on August 26, 2023.
Magicast MetaPoo April Fool’s Mini Set. *MetaZoo HQ*. Accessed on August 26, 2023.
Chalk

## About

Chalk is a peculiar OC, which even Zombie's OCs find puzzling why Zombie made him in the first place. Initially, Zombie intended to make Chalk an edgy character with the ability to summon demon hands or tentacles to attack people. However, as time went on, Chalk evolved into a more amorous personality.

Chalk is known for his tendency to flirt with other characters or engage in random activities. Once, Milk reported that Chalk had stalked him while wrapped in wet toilet paper in the middle of the night. Flower Pot is unhappy with Chalk's behavior, but still takes care of him to prevent him from behaving strangely. However, despite their relationship, Chalk continues to flirt with other characters.

Despite Chalk's peculiar behavior, he is the strongest OC. Chalk puts in a lot of effort and hard work, as he enjoys facing challenges and trying to best others. This often results in others disliking him. However, despite his quirky nature, Chalk takes his work very seriously and is always willing to go to great lengths to protect Zombie's OCs and, of course, Flower Pot.

## Abilities

* Voice Changing
* Fly
* Summon weird demon hands or tentacles to attack people
* Invincibility
Basil

**Under Construction**
***Go do something else while you wait will ya?*** - Coffee

This page is currently being worked on and is not yet complete...

## About

Basil is known for his Intelligenge and his great leadership skills. He is competing to get enough money to care for his farm that he owns.

## Trivia

* Basil is the oldest GMOF character. He was created in 2021
Beta Objects Wiki

### Welcome to the Beta Objects Wiki!

Welcome to the Beta Objects Official Wiki! The wiki is still under construction so expect some goofy ahh bugs.

### What's Beta Objects?

Beta Objects is a upcoming Web Series made by Froggy\_2763 about virtual sentient objects helping a Zombie looking person.

The upcoming Pilot coming out in late December is about Zombie making an awesome party and the origins of how his objects friends were created!

### Check Out Our Cast!

Check out the amazing Cast for the show! Click on one of the characters to learn about them!

### Join Our Discord!

Please join our Discord Server if you want to support this massive project of mine! I’ve been working hard on this one show for 4 years now and I like how it’s going so far! We're also trying to reach Level 2 on the boosts! So please consider joining!

*Copyright © 2023 Froggy\_2763 - All Rights Reserved*
Skauch

**Content Warning!**
***You know shits crazy when I'm involved.*** - Ice Cube

This article contains potentially sensitive content that may be discomforting or upsetting to certain users. Viewer discretion is advised...

**Under Construction**
***Go do something else while you wait will ya?*** - Coffee

This page is currently being worked on and is not yet complete...

## About

Skauch, also known as “A Dead Bird” was found by Zombie on the street. Zombie decided to keep him since Skauch looked like the mascot from a rock band called Millencolin. Skauch was later adopted and became Zombie’s OC. Skauch is most of the time skateboarding outside which explains why he doesn’t make a appearance a lot. But outside of that. He's the only OC to not only be adopted, but is also the only OC that cant speak. Because of that, Most people struggle trying to interact with him. Beta Dave later Created a necklace so skauch can speak, but ended up saying so many slurs and immediately breaking the necklace because it scared him. But outside of that, Skauch enjoys to annoy a lot of people, except for Airpod since he's close friends with him surprisingly.

## Trivia

* Skauch used to be blind
* According to Airpod, Skauch has met the Twitter Bird
* Skauch‘s name came from Millencolin’s album “Skauch"