Batman VS Iron Man (DC VS Marvel)

**Batman VS Iron Man** is the 47th One Minute Melee. It features the two comic book rich men, *DC's* returning Batman and the newcomer of *Marvel,* Iron Man.

## Intro

(\*Cue: Unknown Track\*)

**Tony Stark** sits in a very expensive couch in his building taking a shot as the room darkens.

<music stops>

The power has gone out.

Tony: *"Uggghh."*

JARVIS: "*Sir, there's been a local power outage. Shall I run a scan of the building for intruders?"*

Tony: *"Don't bother."*

Behind him, a man in black with two spiky bat-like ears arrives from the top of the ceiling. It's the **Batman.**

Tony: *"Heeeyyy bats! I see you're still oblivious to doors."*

Batman: *"You know why I'm here."*

Tony puts ddown his shot glass.

Tony: *"You know, I'm a genius, but I'm not a psychic. Someone had better be dying."*

Batman: *"Someone is always dying. Someone is always comitting atrocities, someone is always calling for help.*

Tony rolls his eyes.

Batman: *"And SOMEONE is SUPPOSED to be helping."*

Tony: *"The..police?"*

Batman stomps his foot on the ground.

Batman: *"You've been slacking, Tony Stark. And if you don't uphold your obligation to help the general public, you'll become their enemy. You'll become MY enemy."*

Bruce's face is now uncomfortably close to Tony's.

Tony: *"Now, that's being a bit..melodramatic, don't you think? Look, I'm going to count to five, and if you're still here by the end of that, you're going to go from a guest - to an intruder. One."*

Batman stands still.

Tony: *"Two."*

Batman stands as the Mark 46 arms come out, and surround Tony's.

Tony: *"Three. Four."*

They have now fully surrounded the arms. The hand charges a blast inside it's palm.

Tony: *"Five."*

The blast explodes as both Tony, now fully transformed into the Iron Man, and Batman fly onto the top of a building.

(\*Cue - What Money Can't Buy\*)

Batman: *"I'm going to have to discipline you."*

Iron Man: *"Not before you tell me where to send an invoice for the damages."*

## THIS OUGHTA BE A MATCH TO REMEMBER!

Iron Man sends a missile from his shoulder flying towards Batman, but he dodges it and runs over. Iron Man gets off the ground and sends two repulsor blasts, but both of them miss. Batman jumps up and hits Tony right on his head, sending a flurry of blows onto him. Iron Man flies into a wall, and tries to send a repulsor blast, but Batman punches him before that happens, punching him once more, and then again. Tony hits him, but Batman takes it and punches again. Tony then takes off and grabs Bruce as they fly off the top of the building.

Tony flies Batman into the brick wall of the building, and through it. He then knees him out of his grasp and sends more blasts right at him before charging the Caped Crusader's way. Batman is crashed into an alleyway, and outruns the blasts. Batman runs as Iron Man shoots two large blasts of energy. They miss, and Bats takes out his Grappling Gun, grappling onto his back. He kicks Tony into the wall, and beats him to a pulp against it. But Iron Man flies up and then back down, attacking Bruce several times. He uppercuts him and uses the Unibeam to launch him away.

Iron Man: *"G'NIGHT, BATS!"*

The two are launched into a sidewalk. Iron Man's arm is charged with power.

Iron Man: *"JARVIS, do we have enough power for the Proton Cannon finish?"*

JARVIS: *"Certainly."*

Iron Man: *"Alrighty, then."*

Batman throws a batarang forward and runs Tony's way. Iron Man summons the Proton Cannnon in the air and charges it towards Batman.

Iron Man: *"HERE'S THE BIG ONE! PROTON-*

Batman's head is just under the laser's way.

Iron Man: *"CANNON!!!"*

The laser fires, creating a loud sound and blurring the area. The blast ends at the wall.

<music stops>

After the burst has cleared, Iron Man is completely depowered, and has a Batarang up it's back. He has dropped the now useless Proton Cannon.

Iron Man: *"A little...miscalculation on how much power we had, JARVIS?"*

JARVIS: *"Well, sorry, old chap!"*

Iron Man: *"You''re supposed to be a super computer. I- HOW DOES THAT EVEN HAPPEN?"*

Sounds start to eminate from Tony, as Batman stands behind him.

Batman: *"Sleep tight, Tony."*

Iron Man: *"Wha-"*

The batarang lodged in the Mark 46 suit explodes, destroying the building they stand on/near in a fiery explosion.

**K.O**

The Iron Man, defeated, flies onto the streets of the city. Batman stomps his heel onto the head.

Iron Man: *"OK, OK, I get it! I'll do my job better, Jesus."*

Batman: *"Good. Then my job here is done."*

Batman walks off the scene, as Tony gets up.

Iron Man: *"You know, there are better ways of telling a guy to do his jo-"*

Iron Man looks around. Batman has already dissipated from the scene. Tony sighs.

Iron Man: *"...Asshole."*

(\*Cue: Morningstar - 'Rise' - Batman Dubstep The Dark Knight Rises Soundtrack\*)

**This melee's winner is... Bruce Wayne!**

## Trivia

* This is the first fight between two comic characters since Season 2's Green Arrow VS Hawkeye.
* This is the first fight to use a returning character, Batman, seriously. Sonic returned as well, but for a joke fight.
* For unknown reasons the announcer call Bruce Wayne, but not Batman.