Glib

*“"I don't care if it is now, or tomorrow, or in a hundred years: you will die by my hand, and I will drink every ounce of blood you have in you or will ever make."”*
— Glib to Goodbid, Are You There God? It's Me, Glib.

## Information

### Aliases

Glib
Gliberty
Glib the God Drinker
Frog Man

### Species

Frogpyre
Human (formerly)

### Status

Undead

**Glib** is "the world's unluckiest being," as dubbed by Panda. a Frogpire Kraken warlock

He was once a human training to be a wizard, but he cheated on a test of creating water and in the process was cursed by an old god. The teacher was upset over the fact that he cheated on the exam, so he was then turned into a frog, Supposedly, on his was out of the school after being expelled he was bitten by a vampire.

turned into a frog; he was subsequently expelled from school, and was bitten by a vampire on the way out. At that time, he was in his mid-20s. He later made a pact with a Kraken in order to gain access to magic, and was assigned a batwinged squid as a familiar.

Several years later, while "pushing 30," Glib visited the town of Lauterton in Vontral in order to search for magical items reclaimed from the fortress of the deposed necromancer Eovard the Malignant. He was nearly murdered by Mr. Bycocket on behalf of a powerful wizard, but was saved by the intervention of a Tabaxi Rogue, and the two were unwitting joined by a Changeling Sorcerer on their way to Eovard's fortress.

The three were later recruited to act as scouts for Callisto, and sent to find a changeglass portal in a temple beneath the city of Riftreach.

## Body Count

1. Goblomination (Session 1)
2. Symmetris Agent #1 (Session 2)
3. Chaos Agent #1 (Session 5)
4. Chaos Agent #2 (Session 5)
5. Chaos Agent #3 (Session 5)
6. Chaos Agent #4 (Session 5)
7. Chaos Agent #5 (Session 5)
8. Chaos Agent #6 (Session 5)
9. Chaos Agent #7 (Session 5)
10. Chaos Agent #8 (Session 5)
11. Chaos Agent #9 (Session 5)
12. Chaos Agent #10 (Session 5)
13. Chaos Agent #11 (Session 5)
14. Aldori Drone #8 (Session 8)
15. Allip (Session 9)

## Quotes

* "Stay away from my staff." -- "Session 1"
* "My standards aren't particularly high." -- "Session 2"
* "Hi, Djarrid; sorry for licking you a lot." -- "Session 2"
* "I have a plan, but we probably are going to need the cat for this." -- "Session 3"
* "You can only lick Djarrid if it is necessary for Canyon to murder someone." -- "Session 3"
* "We took some acting lessons on the bird." -- "Session 3"
* "You were talking to a fucking skull, my guy! It's got a hole in it! You tried to shove it on this stick!" -- "Session 3"
* "We may have committed a little bit of grievous murder and run away." -- "Session 3"
* "I'm a very ugly Tabaxi baby." -- "Session 4"
* "Did you just think that frogs do that, you racist fuck?" -- "Session 4"
* "You can definitely lick Djarrid depending on how bad this gets." -- "Session 4"
* "Are you backing up Canyon by that 'everything doesn't need to be solved with violence'!?." -- "Session 4"
* "We fucked up." -- "Session 4"
* "We've done worse things, like releasing a demon." -- "Session 5"
* "I'm going to rip your throat out through your asshole!" -- "Session 5"
* "I hate you, Monopoly Man, and if you join this party, I am going to constantly try and kill you." -- "Session 5"
* "I'm going to drink both of you for breakfast." -- "Session 5"
* "I don't care if it is now, or tomorrow, or in a hundred years: you *will* die by my hand, and I will drink every ounce of blood you have in you or will ever make." -- "Session 5"
* "So, can I assume you're working on the same contract the appetizer over there is?" -- "Session 5"
* "Entree! How do you get out of these fuckers!?" -- "Session 5"
* "I don't know where we are; I don't particularly care. Everyone in here dies." -- "Session 5"
* "You have thirty seconds, and then I drink you like a Capri Sun. Start talking." -- "Session 5"
* "Our house was actually a fucking demon." -- "Session 5"
* "So, do you like looking at the fleshy patch, or would you rather me wear pants?" -- "Session 6"
* "Can I hop in?" -- "Session 6"
* "The only two people that are known to have been there are me and the Cat-Man, and the Cat-Man's in Hel right now." -- "Session 6"
* "We lost a Cat; we gained a douchebag. He's with us." -- "Session 6"
* "There might be a former psychic that was trapped in the Chaos dimension for a couple-hundred years currently out and about wreaking havoc on the world because he wants to turn it into his own personal art project." -- "Session 6"
* "We're smart, and she's talkative." -- "Session 6"
* "Oh, good: patsies! We're all gonna die today!" -- "Session 6"
* "We're gonna deflower the portal, if you don't mind." -- "Session 6"
* "If I die, I'm haunting your ass." -- "Session 6"
* "Did we just release a second problem?" -- "Session 6"
* "If I devised a way to get him into the Order Portal to kind of CTRL-Z this, how do we do that?" -- "Session 6"
* "I am a *frog*, you son-of-a-bitch! Just stay down and don't ask anything!" -- "Session 7"
* "Can you make Djarrid kill him?" -- "Session 7"
* "Remember the plan? Get guide? You got the douchebag over there to come and help us so we can fix you?" -- "Session 7"
* "you can help, or you can fuck off; there's two real options here." -- "Session 8"
* "Hold up; hold up. We are all forgetting the fact that I am a dead frog. So *maybe*, you could pop open the infinite bag of death you have and I can just hide in there with the weapons for a bit instead of being swaddled like a *fucking* Elf baby." -- "Session 8"
* "Hey, Stick: can you give me something more than a tingle, or is it just tingles that you give me here?" -- "Session 8"
* "Stop trying to light my Stick on fire!" -- "Session 8"
* "You got a fucking djinni that can teleport you to another dimension, and I have a *voice-activated STICK*!" -- "Session 8"
* "So let me get this straight: you want to *merge the timeline* back from the split, but you have no idea if it's going to be fucking terrible or not???" -- "Session 8"
* "You only know what a horse is because we forgot something." -- "Session 8"
* "I got darkvision; I'm actually dead, so this isn't too much of a big problem." -- "Session 9"
* "Did you just put a fucking leash on me?" -- "Session 9"
* "You livingist; what the hell is this shit?" -- "Session 9"
* "I hate it here. Why am I on this quest?" -- "Session 9"

## Appearances

* "Session 1"
* "Session 2"
* "Session 3"
* "Session 4"
* "Session 5"
* "Session 6"
* "Session 7"
* "Session 8"
* "Session 9"
* "Session 9.5"

## Abilities

As of Session 3, Glib's stats included:

* 13 STRENGTH +1
* 16 DEXTERITY +3
* 15 CONSTITUTION +2
* 9 INTELLIGENCE -1 (temporarily reduced to -1 by during by session 4 due to The Mindflayer)
* 12 WISDOM +1
* 18 CHARISMA +4
* Armor Class 13
* 31 Hit Points
* Passive Perception 11
* Passive Investigation 9
* Passive Insight 13
* Spell Attack +6
* Spell Save DC 14

### Skills

* +3 Acrobatics
* +1 Animal Handling
* -1 Arcana
* +1 Athletics
* **+6 Deception**
* -1 History
* **+3 Insight**
* **+6 Intimidation**
* -1 Investigation
* +1 Medicine
* -1 Nature
* +1 Perception
* +4 Performance
* +4 Persuasion
* **+1 Religion**
* +3 Sleight of Hand
* +3 Stealth
* +1 Survival

As of Session 7, Glib had 45 hit points:

### Allusions

Glib "is what happens when, like, Reptil from Marvel turns into, like, a thirty-year-old man, and he's just, like: 'This fucking sucks, man. What– I don't want this anymore.'"

From Session Two onward, Glib became affectionately known in the livestream chat as "Glibussy."