Robot Bar Fight

In this song, Humbert describes one of his experiences working at a bar frequented by many iconic fictional robot characters, many of whom end up fighting each other.

## Lyrics

[Intro: Benatar]

Oh snap, it’s a robot bar fight!

Oh no, it’s a robot bar fight!

Oh snap, it’s a robot bar fight!

Oh no, it’s a robot bar fight!

[Verse 1: Puff Puff Humbert]

I remember I used to serve drinks at this local joint 'cause

I was broke but my focal point was

This wasn’t no regular bar

It was a spot where robots were ready to spar

And one night Megatron rolled in

He ordered Pennzoil

Drank it straight from a can

His plan was to go and get wasted again

Standing next to Megaman with a drink in his hand

[Pre-Hook: Benatar]

Robot, robot

Bar fight, bar fight

Robot, robot

Bar fight, bar fight

Robot, robot

Bar fight, bar fight

Robot, robot

Bar fight, bar fight

[Hook: Benatar & Puff Puff Humbert]

Oh snap, it’s a robot bar fight

*Have you ever seen a...?*

Oh no, it’s a robot bar fight

*You ain’t never seen...*

Oh snap, it’s a robot bar fight

*You ain’t never seen a...*

Oh no, it’s a robot bar fight

[Verse 2: Puff Puff Humbert]

Now Megatron was rambunctious, hoping to lay

That lady from the Jetsons, Rosie the Maid

He said, “Hey, baby, can I lube your parts?

We can put our metal together, produce a spark”

Now, she was praying for a man to defend her

From the offender, her friend Bender

Walked in and wopped, clocked, socked him in the jaw

Then he saw Dr. Robotnik

And Robotnik was about to attack

And Terminator grabbed a bottle sayin’ “I’ll be back.”

'Cause he knew Megatron for a couple of years

Hit Bender with the bottle and it busted his gears

[Pre-Hook: Benatar]

Robot, robot

Bar fight, bar fight

Robot, robot

Bar fight, bar fight

Robot, robot

Bar fight, bar fight

Robot, robot

Bar fight, bar fight

[Hook: Benatar & Puff Puff Humbert]

Oh snap, it’s a robot bar fight

*Have you ever seen a...?*

Oh no, it’s a robot bar fight

*You ain’t never seen...*

Oh snap, it’s a robot bar fight

*You ain’t never seen a...*

Oh no, it’s a robot bar fight

[Verse 3: Puff Puff Humbert]

Now Marvin the Paranoid Android was startled, right

And he screamed, “It’s a robot bar fight.”

And Robocop busted in to stop 'em

Started shooting at Robotnik: Blaka! Blaka!

Bullet hit Robotnik in the esophagus

One grazed the shoulder of Maria from Metropolis

Before Robocop could say he was sorry

In jumped her boyfriend Wall-E

Wall-E rolled up, pretty upset

He took Robocop’s gun, pistol-whipped him in the neck

And everybody ran, he was fixing to shoot

At R2 and C3PO kissing in a booth

[Pre-Hook: Benatar]

Robot, robot

Bar fight, bar fight

Robot, robot

Bar fight, bar fight

Robot, robot

Bar fight, bar fight

Robot, robot

Bar fight, bar fight

Robot, robot

Bar fight, bar fight

Robot, robot

Bar fight, bar fight

Robot, robot

Bar fight, bar fight

Robot, robot

Bar fight, bar fight

I just saw a robot bar fight

[Hook: Benatar & Puff Puff Humbert]

Oh snap, it’s a robot bar fight

*Have you ever seen a...?*

Oh no, it’s a robot bar fight

*You ain’t never seen...*

Oh snap, it’s a robot bar fight

*You ain’t never seen a robot bar fight*

Oh no, it’s a robot bar fight

Oh snap, it’s a robot bar fight

*Have you ever seen a...?*

Oh no, it’s a robot bar fight

*You ain’t never seen...*

Oh snap, it’s a robot bar fight

*You ain’t never seen a robot bar fight*

Oh no, it’s a robot bar fight

[Verse 4: Puff Puff Humbert]

Once Wall-E got the gat, he went crazy and snapped

He had everybody trapped, and he started to cap

Every single robot left in the place

Even that goofy bastard from Lost in Space

Wall-E paused for a moment for a re-up

So I fled out the back with Maria

She wasn’t hurt except a scratch on her shoulder

So I took her back to my home and I boned her

[Outro: Puff Puff Humbert]

Ha-ha

Or maybe I just make all that up...