Big Brother 8/Week 3

Okay. now that my freaking out is complete. Paranoia time. I’ve set myself up pretty nicely with...literally everyone on a personal level, and on a game-level, all but three. Naturally, that means I want those three up: Tyler, Lachlan, and Chari. HOWEVER! This is where the BULLSHIT kicks in. The fire and earth teams have a pretty decent thing going where we have this unspoken agreement not to target one another, so that kicks Tyler out. Roisin and Tymeka won’t want Chari to touch the block again, so that takes her out. I just KNOW that Roisin and Alissa are going to want Shay, Liz, and potentially Augusto up and I’m NOT interested in that. At all. Drew and I have an alliance with Liz and Augusto, so that’d leave Shay, and...Shay is an ANGEL!! I want her SAFE!! GRR. I want non-competitive floaters like Chari and Lachlan who will serve no purpose to my game up but nnn it’ll be hard to convince Roisin of that, who I doubt I’m her #1, but I consider her mine rn :(( ughughuufhghuhg. i feel like i’ve been loyal 2 the people i’ve been loyal 2 and i want to stay that way so ughhh we’ll see what happens..."

SOOOOO I thought this would be an uneventful week. Drew, who I've worked closely with in multiple ORGs, wins HOH, I should be good! But of course that's not how BB works, at all. Of course things just go downhill from there. I learn halfway through the veto comp from Tyler that I'm a fucking target! That Drew has been considering me as a target for all this time and I need to talk to him. So I do and that half an hour conversation is going to define my game for at least a few weeks, I can guarantee that. I was always really iffy about being part of the air alliance; i was after all stuck with these people from our results on a quiz; with the exception of Ci'ere I get along with Earth and Fire people a lot better. But even Ci'ere I really can't deal with, because he fucking went to Drew and told him the airs (INCLUDING ME) would come after him if he voted to evict Louise, a girl who was fine with going home her damn self. He never went to the air chat let alone DMs to talk about drew being a target, or anyone else being a target, but here he is being a mess and getting us in heaps of trouble with people who should be our allies. I know I voted to keep Louise but I can't stand when people speak on my behalf and don't tell me what's going on, being his ally was so much more damaging than any enemy I could have made in this goddamn house. I talked earlier about reining in the bull? Well the answer is no. You can do that once but they'll just go loose again, you really really can't have that in the game where you're accountable for his decisions. So I threw him under the bus to Drew and helped get him out. This is about the dirtiest I've felt on a personal level for a move I've made but I had to do it, he left me with absolutely no choice on the matter. If he had not done that BS and Drew targeted Ci'ere anyways, I would have stuck to him, I know I would have. But you can't be a mess like this and target other people I really really care about, taking my allegiance for granted just because I'm air. I think my move was entirely fair and if nothing else it really strengthened my position; I went from a strong player in the ever-targeted air group to being a right hand man of Drew, a position where I know I'll be in a solid position for a while and which gives me plenty of space to maneuver. Because I know Drew's gonna get out in front of shit; he has to, and if not him then Tyler F or someone else. I'm not officially in any alliances but I'm working closely with a group of people who will have my back and I'm hopefully in a spot where I won't be targeted.
But see that line above, where I said it was the dirtiest i've felt personally? That was before this showdown in person with Ci'ere over Shay. Now, I get you want to stay in the game. I do. I get that Shay and I got far closer in the last few days than we've been in a while. But to make sockpuppetry allegations, and no less to accuse a man days away from his 21st birthday of knowingly dating a 15 year old girl...I just don't think that's right. I think that's deeply unnecessary and far lower than I would go to stay in the game. It actually did hurt on a personal level, my love for Shea is one of the most important things I have and I was heated at the audacity that took. But from that point on, I knew I made the correct decision. I really hope Ci'ere and I can reconcile things, I really like the guy, but I can't play a high-stress game with someone with those antics where I have to answer to those all the damn time without even knowing what he's done half the time. It's just not something I have the time, mental prowess or social prowess to do. So this has been a fun week and i'm really really hoping that under Jayme's leadership, someone who I really adore, I can still play hard---I've been playing pretty aggressively this last week and probably will continue to do so---but in a far more lighthearted fashion."

Speaking of AFK...this is one of the weirdest casts ever. Lachlan & Chari seem not to talk to anyone but Drew & Roisin, respectively, and idt Tymeka does either (she’s on my team though….a true queen). Augusto & Liz are just kinda floating along, and I love my bro Jack and my girl Alissa but it almost seems like they’re doing the same thing rn. I can’t tell if they’re disinterested or playing a lowkey game. Thank GOD for Roisin, Drew, and Shay, though. Like, actual people I can converse and strategize with...I love them. George would be with that list but I don’t like how CLOSE HE IS TO TYLER!!!! HATE IT!! It feels like 85% of the cast is floating to jury.
On a brighter note, Roisin and I FINALLY made a legitimate F2 deal! And even though I adore Shay and Drew...I’m sticking w Roisin (at least for now)!!! We just clicked and I’m glad to be working with her!! We also discussed where we wanna go, and I think she’s of the mindset to align w the Earth team until final 7, which...I mean it ain’t for me. I like playing a middle game, and that limits my fluidity. She did pitch an alliance with me, Jack, and Alissa which I’m kinda here for ngl. Pray it is solidified and we can do work...

I love Lachie. But its so hard to like talk to him because he's a sarcastic fuck like 99.9% of the time. But seriously dude, you really need to pick up your social game because it is starting to become annoying to have people message me about how you never message them. I know you hate one-on-one conversations, but like... I know how to navigate the world of Lachlan. Others don't. Pick it up!"

If Earth & Fire are suppose to be working together, he needs to not nominate one of us. Because right now he’s saying he wants everyone to give him a name and then drawl a name out of a hat like a rafflez Then that person will go up as a replacement. Even if it’s his other alliance members because he says he wants to shake up the game.
Listen, Jayme can do whatever he wants on his HOH. But this could come back to bite him whether or not an earth member goes up, because right now he’s willing to let one of the earth members go up even though we’re aligned with him. And if I somehow end up as the replacement nominee, I’m calling bullshit on this strategy."