Smiling Critters:Uncut 2:The Squeakquel

It has been quite a while since I watched the uncut version of smiling critters but I was only scratching the surface.I was playing as peter griffin in fortnite and then my boss gave me another smiling critters vhs tape(who does he think I am,your average creepypasta protagonist?oh,wait) it was titled “smiling critters:uncut 2:the squeakquel” and when I popped it in:Once again I cried,I laughed,I shit,I pissed,I cummed,I Love,I hate,I do so much more than detonate,I came,I saw,I conquered.

Our story began on a sour note:the smiling critter’s parents(plus bubba bubbaphant’s robot from the first one who was wearing bondage gear)were in dogday’s house mourning their dead kids as they held their necklaces as each one of them said a few words about their dead kids(the funniest was the robot who somehow said “my father was my sugar daddy” through a ball gag) the rest were fucking depressing like dogday’s grandma said “I wonder who’ll eat and help me bake my cookies now” and hoppy hopscotch said “I wish I could spend one more minute with my sweet little tomboyish princess” and then the door opened revealing a voodoo doctor alligator who sat down and pulled out a deck of cards and said “the solution to all your problems is in the cards” as he preformed a voodoo spell which brought back the smiling critters but they where a bit more vengeful.Bubba bubbaphant’s robot asked “can I be dom this time,father?” and bubba said “sure” and then the robot got into a 1970 dodge charger and said “nothing is stronger than family” which made me chuckle a tiny bit.We then go to hoppy hopscotch’s karate class and then when she saw the turtle.she put on sunglasses and grabbed a shotgun and walked towards him “hey hoppy,what’s shakin’,bacon?” nervously asked the turtle only for hoppy to shove his ass into her shotgun’s barrel and launch him out of his shell causing him to fly into the skunk and then she put the shell on the panda’s head and then preceded to teabag him as revenge “SWEET JESUS,HOPPY WHERE DID THIS BEHAVIOR COME FROM!?” asked hoppy’s teacher only for hoppy to strangle him with nunchucks and gouge his eyes out.Hoppy then went back into her dad’s car her dad asked “hey,sunshine,how was karate?” “you wouldn’t wanna know” said hoppy as the turtle(wearing sanrio underpants) ran up to hoppy saying “HEY YOU TOOK MY SHELL OFF!” and then hoppy said “no I didn’t you must’ve confused me for someone else” as she gave puppy dog eyes,a big grin and a halo appeared above her head “ok,then”said the turtle who preceeded to put on his shell.We then go to bobby bearhug and craftycorn who were drawing pictures,craftycorn was drawing bubba’s mom which made me cum a fucking tidal wave and bobby bearhug was drawing ash ketchum x shrek.A purple snake came up and said “Hey,craftycorn,can I borrow sssome crayonsss” crafty said “no I have to finish drawing this ass” and then the snake proceded to attempt to attack her and bobby bearhug decided to use a violin as a slingshot to launch the snake into a bucket of paint which made him covered in pink hearts.We then see pickypiggy eating food with kickinchicken and when kickin was eating a popeyes sandwich while picky was eating a whole god damn ham and then they realized they were commiting cannibalism so they decided to switch food and then a bulldog(who resembled a stereotypical gangster) asked for the chicken sandwich only for pickypiggy to eat him whole finishing with his gun as nothing was left except a skeleton as the 2 smiling critters left out of pure akwardness.We finish with dogday and the others playing in puddles,they all shout in unison “this is fun!” and then a voice shyly asked “can I join you guys?” and it was catnap! the smiling critters were more like pissed critters at this point and then hoppy hopscotch and kickinchicken preceeded to grab catnap’s underpants and put them on sticks “WAIT,WHAT ARE YOU DOING,GUYS?I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENDS!” shouted catnap until dogday walked up to him and explained “well when you showed up at my most recent sleepover,you took everything from us and now we’re gonna take everything from you” and the critters ripped off any clothes and stole any kind of personal belonging and then catnap said “c’mon guys that was a joke I never intended to harm anybody!” and then kickinchicken said “you turned me into kfc,not cool dude” and then craftycorn and bobby bearhug pulled back catnap on his makeshift slingshot while the feline was praying for mercy and then bubba bubbaphant and pickypiggy did the countdown and the. dogday said “on that day you took our lives,our dignities and everything else but now we are going to take a little something from you” “what is that?” said catnap as he realized what trouble he was in as bubba shouted “FIRE!” as catnap was sent flying through the air as he grabbed a duck hugged it briefly and screamed with it only to land in a phone wire as he was slingshotted into bobby bearhug’s parents store called “hannibal lecter mask,straitjacket and coffin emporium(only one of each in stock)” and then he landed in a grave reading “RIP catnap” as the critters came back to normal and ran to catnap’s grave as the other critters where all shadowy with only their eyes and mouths(in fed)visible as dogday said “I took everything from you,how ironic” as the smiling critter’s parents came and picked them up as we then see the alligator witch doctor return as he puts the soul of catnap in a tarot card:the end for now

**REFERENCES**

alvin and the chipmunks:the name is a reference to the squeakquel

The princess and the frog:the witch doctor resembles dr.faciller

fast and furious:bubba bubbaphant’s robot references dom toretto from the film franchise

terminator:when hoppy puts on sunglasses and wields a shotgun,it’s a reference to terminator

postal:hoppy shoving the turtle’s ass up the shotgun and firing is a reference to postal’s cat

sanrio:a bunch of sanrio characters are seen on the turtle’s underwear

Monsters inc:the snake resembles randall bogs and his pink hearts further the reference

angry birds:launching catnap out of a giant slingshot could be a reference to this game

total drama:kickinchicken’s “not cool,dude” is a reference to total drama

migration:the duck that catnap encounters resembles dax mallard from this film