Very Minor Characters

**Very Minor Characters** are characters who really just don't need a whole damn page dedicated to them. They usually only show up for one episode and fuck right off and really don't do much except add some good ol' fluff n' filler.

These characters differ from Extremely Minor Characters in that they actually have a speaking role and maybe even an actual effect on the plot

## Daddy Toucan & Fag Birds

   These birds (that one may describe as "angry") appear out of nowhere to attack Drake for really no reason in episode 4.

Daddy Toucan says they got history or something, but long-time viewers were quick to point out that Daddy Toucan was just talking out of his ass at that point.

They are all portrayed by Trent Petersen and appear in Re-birth, Re-boot, Re-tcon

## Danny Devito

   When Dr. Retcon failed to Retcon Jake out of existence, he consolidated this by creating Danny Devito to replace Jake instead. This plan backfired on Dr. Retcon as Danny Devito proceeded to beat the shit out of the Doctor and then die immediately after. Rest in peace.

He is portrayed by Oliver Petersen and only appears in Re-birth, Re-boot, Re-tcon

## High as Fuck Red M&M

   He is one of The Pizza Delivery Guy's main homies and, as his name suggests, is high as fuck. Did he change his name to reflect his current condition? Or was he born into a society rampant with substance abuse and forced to live a life of constant spliffs, tokes and roaches? None know.

He speaks but one word, which is "word..." Deep. Insightful. Profound. With just one word he sheds light on the fragility of the human condition and the temporance of life itself.

His sole appearance is in Chain Mail, where Drake and Spongebob beat the shit out of him for trying to make "like, a buncha money" from Adolf Hitler. He is voiced by Trent Petersen.

## Big Kirb

    Big Kirb is another one of Pizza Delivery Guy's homies and is speculated to have a similar life to that of High as Fuck Red M&M.

He is essentially indestructible, as even a direct hit from Drake's Mowhawk (made of Green Titanium) failed to even phase him.

He has no lines and therefore has no acredited voice actor. But he do be hittin that bong tho.

## Olimar

    Oh...

Hey Olimar...

Long time no see.

## The Jokester

    The "main" antagonistic force in Chain Mail that turns out to just be an illusion made by The Pizza Delivery Guy.

He wears white makeup on his face with red and black makeup to compliment it. He wears a jacket and a green shirt with the phrase "I know Guacamole costs extra" complete with a clip-on tie. He also has the phrase "Sample Text" written on his forehead. Otherwise, how else would you know he's a rushed bootleg?

He is portrayed by Trent Petersen.

## Dr. Poison

    Another Chain-Mail foe who sought to kill Jake and Drake for "not leaving him 10 facebook likes." He supposedly is the Dr. Poison antagonist from Wonder Woman, however this Dr. Poison shares only a name resemblance at best. The Dr. Poison in Wonder Woman was a White German lady with part of her face obsured, while this Dr. Poison is a Black American dude with a Plague mask on. *Strange.*

He Appears only in Chain Mail and just... sort of dissapears? idk.

He is portrayed by Hakim Keebler (Credited as "Hakim La Meme")

## Ghost Girl

    She's a spooky half ghost, half shopping list that is evil and wants to be the one to kill Jake and Drake. But, like The Jokester and Dr. Poison, she fails to do so and essentially dissapears from the story.

As expected, the back of the paper reads "*Milk, Eggs, Cheese*." She eventually gets a gun drawn onto her.

She is voiced by both Myana Ellis and Lionel Jackson, with their voices spliced over each other to sound echoey and mysterious n' shit. The Gun was drawn on by Dexter Bautista.

## Golf Rumors

    "I DO NOT WANT TO KNOW ABOUT GOLF RUMORS.
This thread will probably get 404'd, because of me even mentioning it. As all of them do on 4chan.
But. I want to know what will happen if I try to discover them.
People say use extreme caution when searching it, some people say not to search it at all.
Why?
If anyone could inform me, that'd be great."

-An anonymous /x/ poster from a thread that did not get 404'd (2017)

Golf Rumors appears only in Chain Mail and is portrayed by David Soltani.

## Frank & Other Officer

    These two officers of the law show up only in the end-credits scene of Chain Mail, where they are seen investigating the death of Dr. Retcon from almost two years ago. The Doctor obviously retcons his death, much to the annoyance of the cops as their roles in the story are now moot.

Frank, the one with the coat and Sherrif's hat, is portrayed by Lionel Jackson. While the other unnamed officer is portrayed by David Soltani.

## The Amazing Atheist

    He's from that one crappy soap ad on YouTube.

He was working in tandem with Dr. Retcon in a pathetic attempt to convince the masses that The Jake and Drake Show sucked. Even though the show does in fact suck, people instead decided to mock the doctor's appearance.

The Amazing Atheist appears once in Mad Lads and is voiced by both Jacob Gonzales (credited as Ivory Keys) and Trent Petersen.

## Heckler Dude

    When Dr. Retcon showed anti-Jake-and-Drake propaganda to the masses, this brave soul spoke up when no one would. He brutally destroys what little self-esteem the doctor still had with such jarring insults as "that scarf does plus ten in fag."

It is unclear why he even wanted to watch the video in the first place, since he doesn't even respond to the video, he just roasts Dr. Retcon's appearance.

He is played by David Soltani and only appears in Mad Lads.

## Weird Dude

    This dude weird.

He, like Dr. Retcon, Drake, and The Boss, has broken the fourth wall by peering directly into the camera and saying "what?"  He was then unceremoniously consumed by the void, never to be seen again. In one shot he can be seen using an iPad to watch a YouTube video. It is to be assumed that the video he was watching was cringe and bluepilled.

He appears in Mad Lads only.

This man may or may not have stolen a Nintendo Switch on Campus, if he did it, fukk that mf.

## Body Pillow

    She had formed a temporary alliance with the Pizza Guy in an unknown time before the events of Episode 7. Apparently, she doesn't quite care for the Pizza Guy.

Currently, her only appearance was in Chain Mail, where her only line is "I thought [the pizza guy] would never leave."

She is portrayed by the YouTube content creator, SuperWiiBros08

## Solid Snake

    **Solid Snake** is a video game character and one of the primary protagonists of the *Metal Gear* series created by Hideo Kojima and developed and published by Konami. He is depicted as a former Green Beret and a highly skilled spec-ops soldier engaged in solo stealth and espionage missions, who is often tasked with destroying models of the bipedal nuclear weapon-armed mecha known as Metal Gear. Controlled by the player, he must act alone, supported via radio by commanding officers and specialists. While his first appearances in the original *Metal Gear* games were references to Hollywood films, the *Metal Gear Solid* series has given a consistent design by artist Yoji... (uh, shit I forgot his last name) alongside an established personality while also exploring his relationship with his mentor Big Boss.

At some point in his life, Drake was an apprentice under Snake and was even referred to as "The Green Titanium Project" by Snake in passing.

Snake is protrayed by ~~David Hader~~ Trent Petersen and only appears in codec form in Mad Lads

## Guard Guardman

    Apparently the only police officer who gives a damn as he is quick to the scene when Drake gets cancelled for calling Meta Knight a retard. It is unclear if he can actually see, since his hat is constantly covering his eyes. He also abides the law as he take no bias against seeing Drake and Spongebob being set free after the heinous crime of getting cancelled.

He is portrayed by Michael Mullins and appears in Drake gets Cancelled. He made his debut as the third DLC fighter from the Jake and Drake Show universe for Super Smash Bros. Ultimate and the fourth fighter from the universe overall, after Pizza Guy, Mad Lad and Lawyer Lawyerman.

Despite having the same hat, he bears no relation to the officer paired with Frank in the end credits scene of Chain Mail.

## Judge Judgeman

    The ruling Judge of the infamous Drake vs Meta Knight case. He's argueably not that great of a Judge, as his emotions get the better of him often. He's probably not even a real judge since his outfit is a jacket on backwards and his wig is just a couple of paper towels taped together.

He seems to like to read the newspaper, especially news with an edited image of Mario frowning taped into it.

He is portrayed by Trent Petersen and appears in Drake gets Cancelled. He also has a guest appearance during Guard Guardman's Final Smash in Super Smash Bros. Ultimate.

## Lawyer Lawyerman

    A defense Lawyer given to Drake and Spongebob Squarepants in the Case of Drake vs Meta Knight. It's questionable if he is really a good Lawyer at all, as he doesn't make a very compelling arguement to prevent the cancellation of Drake.

He is portrayed by Richard Music and appears in Drake gets Cancelled. He made his debut as the second fighter from the Jake and Drake Show universe to be DLC for Super Smash Bros. Ultimate and the third fighter from the universe overall, after The Pizza Guy and Mad Lad

He also has the uncanny ability to change his voice to that of General Pepper from Starfox 64.

## Window Guy

    Apparently, Drake calling someone a retard in 2020 is so surprising this random fucker just had to show up for no reason to his express his shock in such an action.

                                 <---- Right here is me looking for who asked this mf.
Opinions aside, he has an uncanny ability to open window blinds from the inside of the house while he is still on the outside. A weird flex, but ok.
He is portrayed by Jacob Gonzales and only appears in Drake gets Cancelled for about two whole seconds.

## The Talking Sword's Girlfriend

Sometime between the events of Episode 4 and Episode 9, The Talking Sword managed to get herself a gf. She is far more feminine in appearance, sporting an overall pink color scheme as opposed to the talking sword's rusty yellow. Ironically, her voice is even deeper than her girlfriends. Her origin is unclear, while the Talking Sword was created by Jake, he had only ever created one.

Her only appearance is during the post-credits scene of The Die Room, where she accompanies The Talking Sword in talking about the final episode of The Jake and Drake Show

My fuckin god. these bitches gay. good for them. good for them