Ash Winters

> I'm a misanthropic, clinically anxious, bipolar lunatic. I avoid everybody.
>
> Ash to Max

**Alasdair Ashley "Ash" Winters** is an English best-selling crime novelist who writes under the name "A. A. Winters". He resides in London, England. He was a student at Oxford, and claims to be a "college Scrabble champion".

## Background

### Biography

Using drugs, alcohol, and sex as coping mechanisms, Ash leads into self-destructive behaviors that his friend, Niall, tries to futilely pull him out of. Experiencing manic episodes and bouts of depression, Ash has attempted suicide before. He is diagnosed with type 1 bipolar depressive with clinical anxiety disorder. He often runs into problems socialising, due to stigmas for those with mental illnesses, and treatment that causes him to feel like a burden to others. Often he pushes away those who try to help.

At his friend Max's stag night, held at a gay bar in Brighton, he meets Essex model Darian Taylor. The two have a one-night stand, and Ash leaves the morning after, believing he won't see Darian again. Later on, Darian visits at one of his book signings. They have sex at his flat, and Ash is invited to the Essex Fashion Show. Ash is terrified at the prospect that he's happy, as good things usually come to an end for him. At the fashion show, Niall reveals Ash's mental health diagnostic, leading Ash to flee the scene. Darian goes to his flat and comforts him. When Ash invites Darian as his date to his friend Amy and Max's wedding rehearsal dinner, he ruins their relationship by saying he's just using Darian once confronted by elitist Hugh Hastings. Months later, Ash finally apologises and professes his feelings to Darian. They attempt to make their relationship work again.

### Behind the Scenes

Alexis Hall described Ash as "overeducated, wordy and a bit of an arse". Concerning Ash's personality, Hall said, "Essentially, from Ash's point of view, society presents him with two choices: take personal responsibility for the fact that other people are upset by your illness, or don't care about people's feelings. We catch little glimpses of this in his interactions with Niall and his memories of his mother. I think (I hope) that Ash really does care about both of them but they both take his illness so personally that he can't invest in their happiness because they've made it so clear that they can't be happy while he's ill. And he can't just stop being ill to please his loved ones. Part of the reason it takes him so long to accept that Darian really loves him is because, at first, he doesn't recognise that it isn't his illness that makes Darian upset, it's his behaviour". He named Ash as the most difficult character to write.

Hall said during his blog tour, "Of course, the downside of this is that Ash is quite a difficult character to read and write. But, whether you like him or not, I find something very human about him. And, ultimately, to me, it's very important that Ash's story isn't really about overcoming depression. It's simply about falling in love, and learning to accept that someone could love you for who you are. Even if that's a bit of a dick".

Discussing in an interview of Ash's parents, the author noted that Ash was not depressed of anything specific. His first manic episode was after drug use and "an unstable lifestyle", and his parents were "cold and distant".

## Bibliography

* *The Smoke Is Briars*
* *Through a Glass Darkly*

## Trivia

* He is an atheist.
* The novel, *Through a Glass Darkly*, is a reference to the biblical phrase. Darian originally believed it was after Annie Lennox's song.
* His novel, *Through a Glass Darkly*, focusses on the protagonist, Rik Glass. His publicist is Amy.
* In the 2023 edition of *Glitterland*, it included an "in-universe" look at a Rik Glass novel for bonus content.

## References

1. ↑ "Book Spotlight Giveaway - Glitterland Author Alexis Hall on Dealing with Depression, Beating Stereotypes, Talking Like a Brit". 9 October 2013.
2. ↑ "Blog Tour Stop, Guest Post & Contest: *Glitterland* by Alexis Hall". 28 August 2013.
3. ↑ Grinnan, Dabney (28 August 2013). "An Interview with Alexis Hall".
4. ↑ *Glitterland*, Chapter 19

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