Kobold in the Cupboard

## Kobold in the Cupboard by R04-LD

KOBOLD #9 FIRST EDITION

a kobold wakes up in a giant glass jar. they are in a cupboard filled with other glass jars with other creatures in them

The rest of you seem to be small when compared to the goblins, but you will always be small.  i’m Goblins and you are.  goblins.  now slowly learn to get up and move.  i want you

GOBLIN # 19 HOLIDAY EDITION

The groan of an incoming card.

goblins.  Are you busy? The kobold lifts his head up and sneers at the goblins around him.

The goblin is getting a large airmail package through the letter slot on the door

The kobold swings his head around.  The goblin lets go of his cards and the lights come on.  Big airmail package coming.  Go in!  Go in!!!

A GIANT WITH ONLY 1 EYE

The giant sticks his 1 eye out the window.  The giant opens the door and goblin 19 falls into kobold 9’s arms and gets squashed.

(pause)

goblins.  Go away. Go away!!! Tiny little goblins hurry, pick up the small things and take them away.   Goblins.  Quiet, please.

TINY TINY GOBLINS  TINY TINY GOBLINS THAT YOU ARE  TINY TINY GOBLINS.  TINY LITTLE GOBLINS PICK UP

Tiny little things! That’s it, Goblins.  And take them away.  Go away.  Hurry before the giant gets here.  You’ll miss the clock.  Tiny little Goblins.  Go away, hurry

Kobold 9 quickly searches for another goblin.  He picks one up and smashes it in front of the giant.

The giant is now staring at a grinning sheep.  The camera slowly pans with the giant. The giant licks the sheep’s face and eyes.  The clock turns 8:17.  goblins.  Go away, hurry. .  tour it through the streets of St. Baphomet.

goblins. But go back to work, hurry!  Tiny little Goblins.  Go, go, go. goblinsgoblinsgoblinsgoblinsgoblinsgoblinsgoblinsgoblinsgoblinsgobblTiny tiny Goblins.

running from the giant, the kobold and the goblins try to escape from the cupboard.  The giant rides slowly past and enters the door.  The giant finds 3 dogs with 1 eye each.  The giant hits each dog with a snowball and opens the door.  The dogs look at each other.  The kobold was sneaky and cast a spell to cover his tracks.  The kobold (goblin 9) grabs the sled of cards.  The dogs escape on the other door, blocking the tiny little door.  He opens the door, the dogs get in and out the door and they got away from the giant.

This is where you are or who you will be  New Book!  This place where you will leave.  with 3 of your neighbors.  3 of your friends.  3 of your friends. the giant yelled.

To be continued...

## Academic Notes by Mahopia Berk

This is the earliest known work believed to be created by the writer known as R04-LD. 'Twas unearthed from a caved in workshop that also housed a printing press, a smattering of moldy collections of tomes, and what seems to be an artificier's workbench. 'Tis unknown when the cave in occured or when the room was built, for that matter. Our usual methods of dating such archeological sites have turned up suspiciously little information. If you compare this piece of work to R04-LD's most recent work, they seem to be worlds apart. Here R04-LD uses a mysterious 'loose interpretation' style for both their word choice and their illustrations. It includes some words unknown to translators like 'camera' and utilizes unnerving, repetative patterns which are remniscent of the stutters of musical machines. After this one of a kind work was arcaned, divined, and deflowered, it was sent to the storybook consortium where it will be added to their Timeless Tomes TM collection and will be available for copy in exchange for a charitable donation to continue the consortium's literary and archeological work.