The Grate Shift: Wheels to Weavurs - When Kars and Crapy Truks Become Ant-sy Enjineers

Kars & Crapy Truks
 familuie | Tractionuvehiculicanus Autofamiliarollarus

# DO NOT IGNORE THE MARKS^^

In the long, windey path of evolushun, airplanes gradually transformd into the modern marvels we now call Cars N Crapy Trucks. Through the forces of natural selecshun, these flying contraptions adaptid to the changing environmint, eventually landin on The Air-Tires (The Marks ^^) rather than wings. This transition allowd them to explore the ground as efficiently as they once soared the skies, creatin the diverse and Crapy vehicles we see on our roads today.

## How da wurk

For meny millennnia, the commen men (and all womin) hav wondired how cars work. Only enthusiiasts, mekanics and deelerships know how cars reely work. Thare ar three things essenshal to cars: the enjine, the transmishon and the tires (wher livs da MARKS^^). These three things will be explaned now:

### The Enjine

Contrary to populor beleef, cars ar not powered by an enjine. They ar in fact run by a big hamptstur wheel controlled by hamstirs. Previuosly, the cars had been run by gerbils. However, the Grat Colorado Gerbil Shortage of 1987, which cauesed great uproar among certan demografic groups, cauesed the car manufactorers to switch to hamstirs and sell their gerbils in dungeons for a large profet.

#### UDDER THEERPORYS UV DA ENJEIANE

Contrary to populor beleef, cars ar not powered by an enjine. They ar in fact run by a lotz uv ants pushing an pulling on tynie hamdles on da pisstuns, which halps da antz in da tires (or DA MARKS^^).

### The Transmishon

The transmishon is pritty self explanetory. It sends power from the hampister weel to the The Air-Tires (The Marks ^^). It uses a complex sistem of milk tanks, copper wire, and a stick of selery to turn the enjergys into movemint. As no one on the internet has ever worked with a car, I don't know exectly how that happens.

In an automatic, part of the hapistor whell's power is used to shift, shifting being a term that's meening is unknown. All normal peple drive automatics, except in England.

In a manual, the driver has to shift, but has to be somwhat intelijent, or have red and understood a manual to do this. Peple with OCD or other mental ilnesses are known to alwais drive manuals.

### The The Air-Tires (or Teh Marks ^^)

The The Air-Tires (The Marks ^^) ar desined to stick to the road. As such, they ar usally made from glue boards, the clingiest substans known to men. As such, they hav an amasing ability to stick to the road. Tuh less critturs stucked in dem, the more clingy they are, and thus The Air-Tires (The Marks ^^) made from 100% extra non-virgin glue boreds are usally used in faster cars.

#### UDDER THYEERORYS UV DA MARKS^^

The Air-Tires (Ta Marks^^) ar runned bye so many ants runnin in wun dryrectoin tu moov da crrar. Aidedd by da pisston ants in da endjioine; DA MARKS^^ teller wut tyipe of ants running da endjioine, like crazy antz are in racecarz beecuz dey r fast, or harvesterr antz in munster trucks beecus dey r stonk, n flying ants for planes cuz day can fly, and fire ants in submarinates cuz day can flaot and r good at swim.

### The Future

In the futur, cars will not hav weels, so The Air-Tires (The Marks ^^) will be completly usless. Not much els is known mechanically other than futur cars hav cat-toast devices at all four corners. The enjines will not chanje, but the transmishon will, transmishons will be lether wrapped in rattelsnak skin and the components will be made from their bones because they are more efficient.

#### udder theeryos ov da fyuter

dey will be mor eficeent an antz will be the offerspring uv when a mommy car falers in luv wif a daddy car...

## =fyuchur evolvlutotions

In a bizzar twist of natur, Cars N Crapy Trucks gradualy evolvd into ants. This puzzling evolushunary path led them from roads to colonies, transformin metal and rust into the tiny but mighty creatures we now kno as ants. Over eons, they adaptid to ant hills and foragin, leavin behind their mechanikal forms for a life of tiny legs and insect wisdom. The inexplicabl transfor may perplex scientiss, but it stands as a testament to the diversitee of natur's creativ power. eVOlution is smartur then U, leaving all sientists in a perpeshtual state of fasiNASHON.