The Devil & Bluey Heeler (Bluey Lost Episode)

Well hello there space ranger! It’s nice to see you for this story you’re going to read or hear. The name’s Rex, Rex Dangervest. I’m a guy in space saving people's lives from lego asteroids. Here’s a question for you. Did you ever watch this show called Bluey?

If you haven’t, I’ll just start off by saying that Bluey is a very weird show in my opinion. In my case, the show is basically Peppa Pig but with dogs. It centers around a blue australian cattle dog named Bluey who lives with her family and her sister Bingo.

However, after seeing this somewhat amusing episode of the show, I somehow started to become part of religion. One day, I was in a Denny’s just drinking a glass of lemonade when this waiter who was Luca Brasi asked if I’d like anything to eat. I ordered some cinnamon roll pancakes with eggs, sausages, bacon and hash browns. Delicious in my opinion.

I was staring out the window wondering what I should do next after I finished eating until this scarecrow showed up and told me that the thrift shop across the street was selling Bluey DVD’s. I asked him what in the world Bluey was. I’ve already told you but the scarecrow wanted to tell me all about it, so I let him.

After my day at Denny’s, I went to the thrift store to see if the scarecrow’s story was true. But before I went in, I met up with a baseball player named George Knox. He told me that an angel from heaven played baseball before and it was the craziest week for him. I then made my way into the store and found a lot of weird stuff such as a totem pole of General Asquith and others.

I met up with this man who seemed right-handed asking me how my day was. I was fine and I went to the VHS section where it had movies like The Simpsons Movie, Iron Man, Barney’s Great Adventure, Jurassic Park and others. I then saw what that person in the Denny’s was talking about. There was a DVD of Bluey in the store.

However, unlike those Peppa Pig DVD’s I used to buy back in the day which had a normal font. This DVD of Bluey showcased the devil bombing the school that Bluey went to. Hmmm….. This looked interesting. I bought it for a good view. The store clerk was a man who wore something that China would wear back in the day.

He warned me that if I watched this DVD, I would have to start being a part of religion. I told him to relax since I go to church every sunday morning. He believed me and told me to be careful. I drove back home to check the mail. It said that I owe the government over 123 dollars. Pretty cheap then I expected. I have a neighbor and his name is Hartley Hare. He once got fired from a puppet show after conspiracy theories state that he’s responsible for teaching children to be naughty.

What a coincidence! Anyways, I went into my house and inserted the disc. The first thing that came on was a warning screen with Freaky Fred that said, “Warning! This DVD will force you to become a part of religion!”

The previews came on. The first preview involved people such as Gareth Eggplant, Blue M&M, Sam Bramsberry, Luna, Jason Teal and Samuel L Jackson doing the floss for 32 seconds. The advertisement was a commercial for a party game for real men only.

Another commercial came and it had Mr Parks discuss that he has diabeetus just like Wilford Brimley and how you can cure the disease.

Then it went to the menu which had Bluey and Bingo doing orange justice from Fortnite. I pressed play and it went to the intro. But however, the actors for the original characters didn’t speak. It was Seymour Skinner narrating the names.

That pissed me off but I continued watching. It started off with Bluey at a school cafeteria eating a sandwich with peanut butter, bananas, bacon, jelly, mayonnaise and lettuce on it. That would have been delicious to make.

It wasn’t until a few bullies who were the junkyard dogs tried to tell Bluey to give her the sandwich. She said no and ran off, but the dogs chased her. Bluey got away with it by hiding in the principal’s office. The best thing about it was that after months of bullying, Bluey should have 5 weeks off while the school does a stop bullying program.

Bluey went home and turned on the TV. She saw a commercial claiming that you could sell your soul for anything. The title of the episode was, “The Devil & Bluey Heeler.” The title card had a picture of what looked like Barney The Dinosaur as a demon.

When the title screen faded out, Bluey said, “That’s it! I can sell my soul for a squirt gun!” Then, Barney as the devil came in and asked, “Is that what you wish for?” Bluey said yes and the devil gave her the select prize. Then Barney said, “Remember! The only way to use that squirt gun is if people are bullying you or there’s a fire.” All of a sudden, the fire alarm in the house went off. Bluey heard it and went to the kitchen.

She squirted it and Mom said, “Thank you dear! You are such a hero!” The devil got upset and said, “You’re not perfect!” Mom got angry and she said, “Well excuse me you dinosaur dressed as Satan! Why did you say that?” The devil claimed that Bluey sold her soul for a squirt gun.

Once the devil left, the mailman who happened to be Herbert Chapman claimed that there was mail for Bluey Heeler. To my surprise, there was a letter from the devil himself. I’m gonna read to you the letter since I’m drinking a bottle of whiskey so here I go.

The letter said:

“Dear Bluey Heeler,

Because you weren’t perfect about using that squirt gun, I have sent out a few punishments to you. One of these include 5 nightmares about random things, and the other, a court session. I hope your family understands this. Do not sell another soul to me from now on.

Sincerely, Satan.”

Bluey then said, “Whatever! I just needed to protect myself from some darn bullies.” But things went all wrong. Later that night, Dad Heeler was putting Bluey and Bingo to bed. Bluey already fell asleep just happily resting.

When the light turned off, I saw that diddly damn monster from Courage The Cowardly Dog saying that Bluey is not perfect. After the nightmare ended, Bluey woke up screaming. Then she fell back asleep but to another nightmare. This time, it involved Bluey inside something out of the Reading Rainbow TV show. She peeked through the telescope and Levar Burton came out of nowhere.

Bluey then screamed again this time waking up Bingo. The 3rd nightmare had various drawings until the final picture caused Bluey to scream so loud that during her scream, there were fire station bells going off. The 4th nightmare had Bluey walking with various people and animals such as Churchill, Pompidou, Joseph Green, Winston Big and Ashley Armbruster.

It wasn’t until they saw the moon from The Legend of Zelda. It came down on the people and Bluey screamed so loud that it immediately triggered Bingo to throw her out of the room. Bluey was stuck sleeping in the hallway for the rest of the night.

The next morning, the devil appeared again and the courtroom was filling. Bluey’s family was asked to come down for an important discussion. The court was now in session. As I saw the entire convention, I spotted some people including Billy Bob Tanley, Charmx and Jimmy.

The devil started the session by saying, “Bluey Heeler, you have been accused for not learning how to use a water gun that has been given to you. Because of this, you will have to spend 5 years in the dungeon!”

There was nothing that Bluey’s family could do as the only way to let Bluey free was to pay 99 dollars, but they did not have that kind of money.

After that, it cut to the credits with For The Damaged Coda playing in the background. So yeah, I could see why that DVD made me go into religion. I decided to donate all my anime bath scene photo books to a thrift shop after this.

I made my way to this first baptist church in the city of Berkeley, California. I had a nice discussion with a few christians who are named General W.R. Monger, Barry Scott, Juri, A Soapy Girl, Sancy Glown, Anthony Wiggle and The Burger King.

You want to know the weirdest thing about my religion trip? We had to sing the Mr Bean theme during a christmas eve concert. It has been nice chatting with you but I gotta perform a christian song to a sunday school. So long partner.