Needle Beetle

Needle Beetle is probably murdering molesting or eating someone right now in that order.

Origin

Needle Beetle is a troll. He was created in late 2018. He is the most fucked up individual to ever exist.

Biography

Needle Beetle was born in 1984 in Thailand. His mother was a prostitute who slept with an ambassador from the United States. This ambassador was Dad Egbert, father of John Egbert, making Needle and John half siblings. John has in fact had ***SEXUAL RELATIONS*** with Needle. This adds incest to the list of crimes that Needle is wanted for. Needle's criminal history started when he was a grub, where he would enjoy impaling beetles on sewing needles. This earned him his name as well. Needle Beetle has a 413 page warrant out for his arrest in every country on the planet, even the ones that have not been established yet. He has been evading interpol since 1999 and will likely never be apprehended. In November 2018, Needle beetle moved to the Scrat Archipelago because it was the only landmass unregistered on any map. Upon arrival, Needle Beetle was mugged by a Jewish midget who sodomized him with a curling iron. Badly wounded, Needle was taken in by a local pumpkin pimp from Scrat Vegas named Orange Viagra. Upon noticing Needle's twunkish (twinkish plus hunkish) figure, Orange Viagra decided to turn Needle into a gigolo. Needle eventually betrayed the pimpkin and was placed on the top of his hit list.

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Do not translate this or you will regret it.

## Where's The Febreeze? / Needle Beetle Pails Xefros Tritoh

Needle Beetle's first appearance is when he calls up Xefros Tritoh to see if he wants to pail. Xefros accepts his offer. When he got there, he beats on the door saying "L3t m3 in!" Xefros lets him in and the former thanks him. Later, he began arguing with Dammek which gets him beaten to death with Cheese Noodle's burnt arm.

## Scratswap

When Scrat woke up from passing out from drinking the "unknown" liquid, he finds Needle Beetle. He offers him a deal that if he built a statue of Jegus, he would be healed.

After Scrat completes the statue, Needle tells him to honk the statue's donk, or he would honk Scrat's donk. So Scrat did honk it's donk. The statue came to life and butch-slapped Needle. He was forced into a wall. Needle returned to his hive, knowing he would fight Scrat again.

## Preparing For War!

Needle Beetle is revived by Tinfoil Tavros with holy water. He would fight in the battle that was brewing.

## The Final Battle

During the battle, he fought Xefros. The latter claimed he made him kill Dammek. He replied with, "That h3ck3r had it coming." Needle then grabbed his knife, and stabbed Xefros with it. He began licking Xefros' blood, "It tast3s lik3 black ch3rri3s." But the blood began tp dry, he couldn't lick it off. But Xefros had got back up after the oliveblood cut his own tongue off. Xefros then charged at him He had two horn holes in his chest as he floated away in the icy water.

## Trivia

* Needle appeared in four out of the fifteen original Scrat Fiction stories
* He has used the lenny face
* He got his name from stabbing beetles
* His quirk refers to his thr33 fangs. he had four but one got knocked out in a fight or a meal he was eating like an idiot.
* "Xefros then hears a sound identical to a zipper" is when it is shown that his stupid fucking pants have a stupid mcfugging zipper
* MustardMinneola accidentally made his hair look like Jude Harley's