Cannibalize This

Space Tree and Mee Marone are going to a planet that doesn't allow kids, so The Commander and Allon have to wait for them on a big asteroid. Yeah, an asteroid. This is my cartoon, so they can survive there. *Or can they?*

## Transcript

*(open to ST's ship parked on an asteroid; zoom in to the crew standing outside the ship)*

**SPACE TREE:** Look, it's not my fault that they don't allow kids on this planet, alright? I don't make the rules.

**COMMANDER:** Yeah, but since when am I a kid? I choose to take that as an insult.

*(enter Mee)*

**MEELORD:** Hey, why don't you shut up and go play in the ball pit? Hehe...

**COMMANDER:** Ball pit? Just what are you implying?

**SPACE TREE:** You just have to wait on this asteroid thing until we get back. There's plenty of oxygen here, so you'll be fine. I know how much you like oxygen.

*(we see Allon is in the ball-pit, with a milkshake (REMEMBER THIS LATER?!))*

**ALLON:** Hey Space Tree, can you leave us some food?

**SPACE TREE:** Shut up, Allon! You won't need any food; we'll just be like an hour. See ya then!

**MEELORD:** Bye bye, KIDS. Hehe...

*(they enter the ship; Commander threatens to punch Mee)*

*(the ship takes off, and that beat plays; cut back to the asteroid)*

**ALLON:** So, Commander, do you wanna play "I Spy"?

**COMMANDER:** Oh, OK. I spy with my little eye... a piece of crap.

**ALLON:** Uh... Is it me?

**COMMANDER:** \*sigh\* Space Tree better hurry up and get back here. I can't take an hour of this.

**ALLON:** Hey, wouldn't it be funny if Space Tree forgot about us or something, and we got stranded here?

**COMMANDER:** Allon, sometimes I forget just how retarded you really are. There's no way such a thing could ever happen. EVER. (he spells in out in the air, with the letters appearing and everything) *E-V-E-R. Eever.*

*(time passes; Commander has now grown a beard)*

**COMMANDER:** This is all your fault, Allon! You totally jinxed us earlier!

**ALLON:** Ugh I'm so hungry.

**COMMANDER:** Yeah, me too. Hey, you know how I'm a human, and you're... not. Because of this undeniable fact, would it really be considered cannibalism if I ate you? *(holds up a fork)*

**ALLON:** ... *(angry)* Yes!

**COMMANDER:** Oh. Well, I was just curious.

*(more time passes; the Commander's beard has grown even longer)*

**COMMANDER:** What about if I just ate your arm? Because that's not-

**ALLON:** It's still the same thing!

**COMMANDER:** You know, it sounds like you know an awful lot about this kind of thing, Allon! You've probably been planning to cannibalize ME, haven't you!?

**ALLON:** You know what, Commander? I'm starting to get pre-tty sick of your crud, alright?

**COMMANDER:** Oh you wanna fight, Amanolla? 'Cuz, I dunno what crud is, but I'm sick of yours also!

*(Allon leaps onto the Commander)*

**ALLON:** Aagh!

**COMMANDER:** Allon, what the he-

*(he starts beating the crap out of the Commander; after a bit, the Mirage walks up)*

**MIRAGE:** Whoa. I was just coming to kill you guys, but... I'll stay out of this one. *(he leaves)*

**ALLON:** Oh, you're next!

*(Commander tosses Allon off him)*

**COMMANDER:** You're crazy, Allon! Being stuck in this place has really gotten to your fat head!

**ALLON:** You're the fat one!

**COMMANDER:** See what I mean? You're not making any sense.

**ALLON:** YOU'RE MAKING SENSE!

**COMMANDER:** Hey, is that Space Tree?

*(pan over, and yes, it really IS him)*

**SPACE TREE:** Man, what the hell happened to you guys?

**COMMANDER:** Space Tree, is that really you? I can hardly recognize you after all these years.

**SPACE TREE:** Uh, yeah, it's me. Were you guys about to kill each other or something?

**COMMANDER:** Well, yeah, but only because you left us here for so long!

*(the sunglasses fly onto him)*

**SPACE TREE:** Well, it was just my bi-annual Halloween prank!

**COMMANDER:** You call leaving us stranded here for two years a prank!?

**SPACE TREE:** Two years? It's only been two hours. Getting here an hour late was my hilarious Halloween prank. *(the sunglasses fly off again)*

**COMMANDER:** Well, if it's only been two hours, how did I get this beard?

**SPACE TREE:** That beard's totally fake. *(he tears it off)*

**COMMANDER:** Oh! Well... That actually makes... some sense. So then why were we acting so crazy?

**SPACE TREE:** Well, it's just a guess, but I think it's because you're both idiots.

**ALLON:** YOU'RE THE IDIOTS!

*(enter Mee, Part II; a countdown starting with "Time Left: 0:36" appears in the corner)*

**MEELORD:** Actually, that was all part of MY annual Halloween prank.

**SPACE TREE:** Oh, why don't you just copy everything I do?

**MEELORD:** Commander, don't you remember that milkshake you had earlier?

*(flashback to said events)*

**COMMANDER:** Yeah, what about it?

**MEELORD:** Well, I spiked it with several mind-altering narcotics.

*(flash back to the present)*

**COMMANDER:** Well i didn't even drink that milkshake, I gave it to Allon.

*(we see Allon has now taken off his jacket)*

**ALLON:** YOU'RE A NARCOTIC!

**SPACE TREE:** Oh, I thought something was up with him. I mean, let's be fair, he may be a piece of crap, but he's smarter than you, Commander.

**COMMANDER:** Smarter than ME, Commander? Sounds like YOU'RE the crazy one here, Space Tree. *(he starts the cheap laughter, a la No Chalk)* A ha ha ha...

**SPACE TREE:** Shut up!

*(Allon leaps onto the Commander)*

**ALLON:** GIVE ME YOUR FACE!

*(they're yanked offscreen)*

**COMMANDER:** OH GOD!

*(roll end credits!)*

## Easter Eggs

* Click the TMC on the end screen to see the Mirage's cut (TMC) of this episode.

### Easter Egg Transcript

*(cut to the Mirage, eating Ice Cream)*
**MIRAGE:** Oh, hi, didn't see you come in. You know, when I first saw this episode of the enormously popular cartoon 'Space Tree the Space Tree', my original reaction was: Boy, this episode is even more retarded than me. But then I thought; let's be fair. Could I do better? And the answer is yes, I really could. So I went into the editing room and pulled this out of my ass. Roll the tape, Allon.
*(cut to Allon, who pulls a switch, then cut to episode: ST000039, the Mirage's cut, then cut to Allon, hitting the Commander, the Mirage comes in, then zoom in to the Mirage's face, who smiles)*
**MIRAGE:** I wish for world peace.
*(cut to end credits, animated by the Mirage, music by the Mirage, presented by Miragetoons (fake Keentoons logo))*

* At the end screen click the crappy drawing of Allon above the menu button.

### Easter Egg Transcript

*(cut to Allon on a ladder, Space Tree and the Commander look up)*
**ALLON:** I am a golden god!!!

## Fun Facts

* First appearance of the non-paper-drawn Mirage.

* Ed Atlin announced this episode's name a few days in advance in a post on the Space Tree forum.

## References

* In the easter egg, the Mirage sits at the desk of Alan Rickman, an English actor, which is the same desk Allon sat at when he was SVP.
* The title may be a reference to the movie Analyze This.
* The round pills put in the shake read 'Teamocil', the name of an antidepressant from the TV series Arrested Development.
* Allon makes the comment "I am a golden god" which is a line used in a popular scene in the movie Almost Famous.