Stanley

Stanley Czyropowicz Kowalski, also known as "Mr. S," "Stanley the Manley," and "Big Daddy Fresh," is a main character on the semi-popular web series Life As A Mermaid.

Physical Appearance:

Stanley is one thicc bih.

Personality and Traits:

Stanley is exuberant, playful, wise, strong, silly, desperate, pathetic, stoic, benevolent, and Machiavellian. He greatly loves and values his friends and ruthlessly destroys his enemies. He is a master of every martial art on the planet and in 2012 was named the United States Poet Laureate.

Bio:

Stanley was born in 1968 to Polish refugees. He was shipped away to waiter school the moment he turned six years old, with only an old shoe and a Blu-Ray copy of Splash to keep him company. Through this movie, he first came to love (and also fear) all things related to mermaids. For the entire eleventh year of his life, he desired nothing more than to be Eugene Levy, but the cruel headmaster of waiting school beat this dream out of him. Upon graduating from waiting school in 1986, Stanley attended Brown University to attain a Master's Degree in karate. He also paid the bills with a part-time job in the CIA. He got his first waiting job at a Carl's Jr in Arkansas in 1994, and did nothing but wait tables and watch Splash on repeat for the next twenty years.

Season 1:

Stanley first encountered Madison the Mermaid while serving as a waiter at Shoeless Bob's Eat Factory. Instantly falling in love, he devised a devious plan to entrap the mermaid by starving to death in the desert, but it didn't work.

Season 2:

Stanley became involved in an international incident involving Nordic terrorist Astrid Ivansdottir's plot to capture a mermaid and use it to bring down the Spanish government. As a result, the King of Spain swore a lifelong vendetta against Stanley, and hired a collection of international assassins to end him.

At the same time, Stanley met the love of his life, Jed the Fisherman, though he was too sexually confused to act on his feelings. Nevertheless, the two displayed a strong attraction throughout the season, leading to the #Jedley ship taking over Tumblr.

After being kidnapped and tortured by mermaids, Stanley was visited by the ghost of Eugene Levy and convinced to change his ways. He then shed his skin and metamorphosized into Meta Stanley, which was more powerful than the regular Stanley but not yet his final form.

At the end of the season Stanley got stranded on an island and died.

Between Seasons:

Stanley got a girlfriend named Shelley, but then he forgot about her and she died of hepatitis B.

Season 3:

Stanley continued his quest for the Infinity Stones by traveling to the Sector 6 of the Gamma Quadrant, where he arm-wrestled Thanos into submission. He was then summoned back to Earth because his mermaid friends were locked in mortal combat with the Barnacle King, an inter-dimensional entity composed of the malicious thoughts of every barnacle alive. Stanley used his CIA skills to disguise himself as a pickle and infiltrate the Barnacle King's Legion of Terror. Using subtle psychological manipulation, Stanley turned the Legion against itself, leading to its collapse.

Unfortunately, Stanley's victory was short-lived, as one of the King of Spain's assassins caught up with him and fed him to scorpions.

Season 4:

Early in the season, Stanley was devoured by the Demon King Nightmare, but his essence survived, and he was reincarnated as Omega Stanley, his final form. His ultimate battle with Nightmare destroyed all of reality, so Stanley remade the universe at the cost of his own existence. His friends mourned him, but little did they know that he had stored a copy of his soul in a pickle.

Jed found the pickle and used a combination of genetic manipulation and dark magic to restore it to humanoid form. They declared their love for each other and departed for the Himalayas, where Jed had been crowned King of the Sherpas. Together they ruled benevolently for a thousand years, until they ascended to a higher plane of being and went to sleep in the mountain until their people needed them next.