2022 Power Rankings-Playoffs 1

## Introduction

Somehow I have to come down off the high of that World Cup final and get this writeup finished.

Welcome to the 2022 Festival of Champions. Six teams each took unique and difficult paths to get to the party, several clinching on the final day of the regular season. There is no clear favorite and the four games already played in week 15 have only muddied the waters, with top-scoring Pain Train now projected to lose to Papa's Posse thanks to an early injury to Jonathan Taylor.

Let's recap week 14's interesting slate of games, then review the regular season stats, and then look forward to the playoffs.

## All-Time Season Finale Records (Minimum Two Games)

Here is how everyone has performed throughout their franchise history on the final week of the regular season.

Mattness, who has never lost back-to-back finale week games, will look to hold their all-time record with a 9th win in 2023.

RIPDab and Paddock 9 are each on the hottest streaks of their career, having sealed the deal in each of the last three seasons (be a real shame if they face off in 2023).

Sweet Dee has now lost three straight regular season finales and has 8 losses in 10 tries. Idiots is not fairing much better, still unable to pass JarJar Stinks on this chart despite playing double the seasons.

## Week 15 - How it Happened

Without blabbing on and on, here is how it all went down.

### Duck Punchers Gets the Cup

It didn't take much for Duck Punchers, whose 10 wins should not be downplayed because it it still an accomplishment any time you get double-digits in the win column for a fantasy season. But Duck had the lowest winning score in week 14 and could have benched his QB because Pain Train did not show up. The tone was set early, with Pain Train and his 3,000 point squad failing to score with Davante Adams and Foster Moreau (Moreau quite literally did not score). With a decent buffer, Duck made quick work on Sunday afternoon with Big Booty pulling a rabbit out of a hat trick. On Monday night, NE Defense scored nearly 40 points to seal the deal. Duck grabbed NE off waivers, a true shocker of an add considering the season this D is having. However, it is worth noting that the Patriots face the Bengals in the Festival Semifinals...

### Ma ma momma said Gets the Bye

There was very little drama in this matchup as well. Mattness benched four wins this season, but maybe it is better that he did. In a "perfect" world, if Mattness had gotten those four wins, he would be 7-6 heading into week 14 and then would have completely choked his season away. Momma got a good showing from Mahomes and Chase for his second 9-win season in a row. Last year that was good enough for 1st place, owning the points against 2nd place Duck. This year, the two swap spots and momma settles for 2nd place.

### Papa's Posse Puts League on Notice

If people still aren't nervous about this team, they should be. In 2022, there was only one team that did not take an L vs. Papa. With their season on the line, Papa was quickly put in a bad spot as Sweet Dee's Derrick Henry broke 100 rush yards in the first half vs. Jacksonville. But the Jags clamped down in the second half and Dee went from a winning projection to a losing projection in the span of a quarter. Papa had already set a tone early with yet another solid day from Josh Jacobs, the shock of the season, and Kirk Cousins turned the ride with his 400+ yards. With this big win, it became obvious that RIPDab vs. Shotti had become an elimination game.

### Shotti vs. Dab: The Rivalry Lives

By far the most exciting game of the week, Shotti vs. RIPDab had the heat turned up once it became clear all the other avenues of entry into the Festival had closed. Only one remained: win. Both teams played very well in their first matchup since the 2021 Cinco De Lose-O, but losing Lamar Jackson might have been too much for Shotti to overcome. There was a very narrow window for Shotti to come back and claim victory on Monday night, when James Conner appeared to go down early for Dab with an injury. But Conner came back and put on a clinic, and Hopkins didn't do enough to keep pace. So after eliminating RIPDab five times in the postseason, Dab gets some revenge by sending Shotti into the Consolation Bracket.

### When is a Win a Loss? Paddock 9 and Stupid Both Lose Week 14

In a very strange situation, Paddock 9 got his 7th victory of 2022 but still managed to lose. Stupid Idiots lost, but still managed to win. Paddock 9 needed to outscore Stupid Idiots by 32+ points to swap 6th and 7th with them and make the tournament. With only Tyreek Hill left to play, Paddock 9 had a 38 point advantage. If somehow Hill didn't score, he could have pulled it off. Drama unfolded when Hill took a fumble to the house, a scoring catagory that is not activated in the LOC (but likely will be for next season). When Hill went to the lockerroom early and was questionable to return, there was some concern that this score nuance might end up being the difference between the defending champ making it to the tournament and Paddock 9 pulling the greatest regular season comeback in LOC history. But Hill came back and scored a 60+ yard touchdown to stab P9 in the heart. It may sound dramatic, but it's the truth: his entire season hinged on the DJ Moore/Duvernay trade that led to a single 22-point play in P9 vs. Papa's Posse that swung their matchup, cost Paddock his score advantage and his season, and clinched playoffs for Papa.

## The 2022 Commissioner's Cup Winner...

At this point it is damn near indisputable. Most wins. Most points scored. 9th in losses among all active teams, behind only a team that has played six fewer seasons. And now four Commissioner's Cup victories. THREE different streaks of over 20 games without back-to-back losses. The Duck Punchers is the LOC's greatest regular season team.

Congrats to Duck, whose 21 roster moves throughout the regular season were just enough to help him maintain the lead for the top spot. Now we will see if this team, who does not always carry his greatness to the postseason, can take it the final two weeks and bring home the good stuff.

## Who's Hot, Who's Not?

Just as a reminder: charts are color-coded on the website but only if you read on your computer. Nothing has color on mobile.

Scoring Over Last Three Weeks
 Papa's Posse
 RIPDab
 The Shotti Bunch
 The Stupid Idiots
 Duck Punchers
 Pain Train
 ma ma momma said
 The Multiverse of Mattness
 Sweet Dee

The Stupid Idiots did everybody in the Festival of Champions a huge favor in week 14 by keeping pace with Paddock 9's scoring, even in his loss, ensuring that the league's hottest unit was not able to wreck havoc in the postseason. But the news is not good for Idiots, who came into last season's playoffs as the hottest team and won the Glory Bowl. This year, Papa is the hottest team in the festival and RIDPab is right behind him. That puts Idiots and Pain Train on notice in the quarterfinals.

## Matchup Recap

* Duck Punchers wins the Commissioner's Cup by taking care of business against the league's top scoring Pain Train (12-8). **Next Matchup: N/A**
* Ma ma momma said clinches a bye with the lowest winning score of the week in a season sweep of rival Mattness (10-10). **Next Matchup: 2023 Regular Season**
* RIPDab eliminates his arch-rival and claims a fourth-straight victory dating back to 2019 against The Shotti Bunch (10-13). **Next Matchup: 2023 Regular Season**
* Papa's Posse leaves no doubt with a blowout of the week victory to claim his 10th all-time victory against franchise rival Sweet Dee (10-9). **Next Matchup: 2023 Regular Season**
* Paddock 9 wins, but a win is not enough, as he is eliminated by margin of victory against the defending champion Stupid Idiots (6-5). **Next Matchup: 2023 Regular Season**

## Stat Chat

* Papa's Posse becomes the 8th team to reach 80 combined wins.
* Paddock 9 becomes the 7th team to reach 70 regular season wins.
* Duck Punchers has not had back-to-back regular season losses since weeks 12/13 in 2020, meaning he is now on a 29-game streak without back-to-back defeats. His record is 31 straight, set from 2018-2020. Prior to that he had a streak of 16 games, back-to-back losses, and then a 25-game streak.
* Ma ma momma said becomes the second team to have a 4 game win streak in 8 seasons (Duck Punchers).
* Papa's Posse finishes the regular season 4th place or higher for just the second time in franchise history (3rd in 2018).
* RIPDab finishes with 8 wins for the third consecutive season. Each of the last two years, Dab lost their opening playoff game.
* Commish becomes the 1st and only team to face over 33,000 points against in the regular season.
* Duck Punchers becomes the 1st and only team to score over 34,000 points in the regular season.
* Paddock 9, The Shotti Bunch, and Papa's Posse become the 6th, 7th, and 8th teams to break 30,000 regular season points scored.
* RIPDab has gone 6-2 against The Shotti Bunch since losing the Glory Bowl in 2017, improving their liftime record against the former LOC dynasty from 4-11 to 10-13.
* Mattness faced the 7th most points against in LOC regular season history.

## Regular Season Overview

Before we turn the page and head into the postseason, a look at some of the updated regular season stat charts.

### 2022 Blowouts of the Week

Only two teams did not get blowout victories in 2022: Sweet Dee and RIPDab. On the other end of things, four teams did not get blown out: Pain Train, The Shotti Bunch, The Stupid Idiots, and ma ma momma said. Mattness was involved in half of all blowouts: two as a winner and five as a loser.

### All-Time Regular Season Standings

Below are the all-time regular season records for every franchise in the history of the league, including defunct teams and teams in their inaugural season. Records are updated through 12/14/22. There have been 158 regular season weeks since the league's inception in 2011.

### Highest Single-Season Point Totals

Since the season was extended to 14 games in 2021, the official record is per game average, not total for the season.

2022 was one of the lowest scoring seasons on record. Only one team broke 3000 points and no team cracked the record books, marking just the second time that has happened (2015).

### Highest Single-Season Points Against Totals

This chart shows regular season points against, also based on per game average due to the additional game from 2021 onward.

Mattness has the 7th most poinst against in LOC history with 226.14 points per game for a grand total of 3165.96 points (that is less than four points short of the most points ever against, though the feat was "accomplished" without the aid of a 14th game in 2018 by The Stupid Idiots).

Mattness how accounts for three of the seven highest points-against seasons ever, with Idiots accounting for two of the top six.

Sweet Dee notches the 28th-most points against and owns the 28th-31st most points against on this list.

### All-Time Regular Season Franchise Points Scored

Despite a solid season, Papa still lost ground to Shotti yet again on the all-time scoring list. It is notable because Shotti has played one fewer season than Papa. Mattness, meanwhile, continues to lose ground to momma who is now averaging just 0.57 points per game less than Mattness. Duck Punchers continues to reign supreme despite being just 5th in scoring in 2022.

### All-Time Regular Season Franchise Points Against Totals

It's not a mystery that no team gets fucked worse than The Multiverse of Mattness, but The Stupid Idiots has seen the most points against since joining the league. Now, whether that is a product of him not playing in the earlier, lower scoring years, remains to be seen. But his average of 210.52 points against per game is above the Commish's lifetime average, making Idiots technically the most fucked of all.

### Team Records By Month

Updated thru 2022 (need to update win% for september but I'm lazy).

And anyone who pays close enough attention may notice one other issue, which is that ma ma momma said only has 60 games recorded in November/December when it should be 61 along with the rest of the original 7. Legit no clue where that extra game went, I'd have to go through all 12 seasons to find it and don't have the time. So Jared is either 31-30 or 30-31.

Mattness was one of the best November/December teams in the league coming into 2022, but his 1-5 record this year cut him down to near .500. Momma, meanwhile, surged to .500 (or above, we're not sure) with a 5-1 November/December finish. No other team was better than 4-2 over that stretch this season.

Sweet Dee's trends continue to be poor. Batting over .500 in September with 19 wins in that month, They have won just 18 games combined from October-December (regular season).

## Absolute Standings

### Combined Absolute Standings

In the actual standings, Nate moved from 7th to 3rd place, an incredible jump in the final week of the season. In the absolute standings, Papa moves from 5th to 2nd, a sign that his team is heating up in scoring.

### Fractional Records

In the actual standings, Shotti dropped from 5th to 8th. But in the Fractional standings, Shotti maintained his spot in 3rd.

Now we add in the W/L records, with a win being worth an added 10 points.

## Power Rankings - Playoff Quarterfinals

* APT: Record Against Playoff Teams
* L3: Record Over Last Three Games

### 1(2). Duck Punchers

With the week off to get healthy, Duck was able to miss some tough matchups for his key players.

### 2(1). Pain Train

Takes a massive hit by losing JT to injury early in the Saturday matchup, but Josh Allen put on a clinic and has him in the mix. Pain Train was the only team to break 3000 points this season but is in a dog fight against hot Papa and his scrappy posse.

### 3(4). Paddock 9

Came up short but is favored to win the consolation tournament and control his destiny in the 2023 draft, which he will ultimately blow.

### 4(6). Papa's Posse

When RBs get hot, teams get hot. Jacobs and CMC are going bananas right now, and CMC already did his part against Seattle on Thursday night. After starting with negative points, Kirk Cousins had another day over 400 yards. His guys are performing, a good start for the 2011 champion.

### 5(3). The Stupid Idiots

The path to defending the title and becoming the third team to win back-to-back Glory Bowls will go through RIPDab, the same team he defeated in the opening round of the quarterfinals last year. History could be repeating itself, because if he wins this week he could be in a semifinals rematch vs. ma ma momma said.

### 6(7). ma ma momma said

Two games under 200 in a row but both wins, which is enough to get him a 9th win and a bye. But five of the last seven games have been sub-200 point performances, so the arrow is not pointing in the right direction.

### 7(8). RIPDab

RIPDab's team is not capable of breaking 200 points...except it did this week. In fact, they topped the league in scoring and they did so without Aaron Jones. It was the first time scoring over 196.50 points since week 9 and it came at just the right time. A team that never breaks projection, he'll have to do so again in the quarterfinals to get the Idiots monkey off his back.

### 8(5). The Shotti Bunch

Wouldn't have even been in contention for a playoff spot had he not pulled off a narrow 156.20-150.55 win in week 11 against Commish. That was the second of two sub-160 point performances (he lost the first to Papa's Posse). Shotti finished the season 2-3, which isn't exactly a "collapse" but certainly uncharacteristic.

### 9(9). Multiverse of Mattness

Had some may chances to get one more win and finish the season in 9th place and just couldn't do it. The bye week definitely played into the shitty week 14 performance (all their starting RBs were either on the bye or hurt), but at the end of the day this was simply a bad team revealing itself. A waste of Justin Jefferson.

### 10(10). Sweet Dee

If every month could be October, Sweet Dee would be a 10-time champion.

## Playoffs???

It's 1:21 as I reach this section. Football is pretty much already over. So instead of doing a huge playoff section, here are the matchup histories of the four quarterfinal teams. We'll go over the rest of the stats next week.

### Papa vs. Pain Train

Updated through 12/7/22

These two have a lot of postseason history. They have played in the Heart and Soul Bowl as recently as last season, but also in 2012. In 2015 they played in the Cinco De Lose-O, and in 2016 they met again in the consolation semifinals. But their only Festival of Champions matchup was in 2011 when Papa pulled a huge upset with the league's first ever 300 point playoff performance. He later won Glory Bowl I.

### Idiots vs. RIP

Updated through 10/30/22

For a matchup that only has 12 meetings, these two teams meet constantly in the postseason. In 2012 they played the last place game, with Idiots winning before leaving the league for five years. In 2020 they met in the Salty Dolphin Bowl with Idiots once again winning the game. Last year, they put up a big game to take out Dab in the Quarterfinals. And now they meet again. Will Dab be able to get his first postseason victory against Idiots, or is Idiots the next Bunch for RIP?

## Conclusion

More to come next week. Best of luck to all and to all a good night!