Episode 14 - If it Pleases the Court

## Intro

**Matt**: Hello and welcome to Celestial Expanse, a real play D&D podcast set in the Celestial Expanse universe, my name is Matthew, I'll be your DM for tonight, with us tonight is Ben, playing as Rell...
**Ben**: Hello.
**Matt**: Jason, playing as Theran...
**Jason**: Where Z marries a tree ent.
**Natalia**: Yes. Canon.
**Matt**: Rebecca as Martle...
**Rebecca**: Hello, I'm the normal one this week, apparently.
**Matt**: Boston as Juniper...
**Boston**: She has fallen in love with a fairy from the nearby woods.
**Matt**: And Natalia as Z.
**Natalia**: Are you my dad?
**Jason**: Sorry, Z, you're barking up the wrong tree ent, if you know what I'm saying.
**Rebecca**: Ehhhh. No.
**Matt**: So how's everybody doing today?
**Boston**: I'm sorry about the phone.
**Jason**: \*sigh\* We were good, until...
**Matt**: I made the mistake of giving you that website.
**Ben**: You did.
**Rebecca**: It's very good.
**Matt**: I'll probably be using it for the rest of the campaign.
**Rebecca**: Oh hell yeah.
**Ben**: I mean it's a great- such great ideas, like a person who claims to worship Demogorgon, but secretly, he worships Demogorgon.

## Summary

### Episode Description

The crew make it to the Parliament Asteroid despite some misgivings and now see the wonders it holds--and what's this? Someone might have a crush on someone else.

### Summary

They reach the Parliament asteroid in the Gori system, and they are escorted by guard ships into the harbor. When they disembark, they are met by Captain Eric and about twenty soldiers, who will be their escort to the courthouse. They get on a very fancy monorail, and Martle holds eye contact with Eric as she drinks some olive brine. Instead of being intimidated, Eric drinks some too, impressing Martle.

They reach the courthouse, which is huge, resembling a senate room. Three representatives are seated at a table on the far side of the room, and behind them is a 15 foot BAT (bipedal armored tank) seated on an appropriately sized chair. It looks unusually humanoid and is holding a sword point-down. Eric leaves with his detachment after giving his number to Martle, who had been flirting with him since the olive brine. The first representative, a tall human woman with piercings above her left ear and a voice modulator replacing her lower jaw, asks about the incident with Arula and Iepetus. Martle says they don't know much, but Juniper says it was the Inquisition. Another woman with pinned up grey hair, Kingseeker, reprimands the other representatives for not attacking them earlier as she suggested. The third representative, an old halfling man, Mr. Bourne, says it's not the time. The first woman asks why they would have attacked Iepetus. Martle tells them about the device they found, and the woman, Artificer Ivy Bolderdown, asks to analyze it. Martle asks for information on the Inquisition's past actions. Both are agreed to, and the party hands over the disk. Martle also tells her maybe-Ashley might have seen who planted the explosion. Bolderdown looks up Ashley and says she died over a year ago, two days before the zombie outbreak on Starbase Cronus. Martle asks for a picture, which matches the appearance of the Ashley they met. Z tells them about Mama Gail, and they promise to bring her to justice. Rell also tells them about the crystal creatures.

Eric takes them to their quarters, and Martle asks for information on a group of elves living on the planet Horuss, in the Encodo system, who were found murdered with the symbol of the Inquisition carved into their chests. He sends someone out for the information and tells her to call him if she needs anything. The party snacks, Z cleans her gun, and Juniper reads more from the tablet. She recalls Arula saying the Inquisition might have had a hand in the destruction of the Gnome homeworld, known as the Shattered Glass event. It seems strange, since as far as Juniper knows that was caused by a war between the orc empire and the gnomes, humans, and elves, in which the orcs were able to launch asteroids at sublight speeds at the planet. Arula was wondering how the Inquisition could have gotten this technology to the orcs, who were not very technologically advanced. Juniper also reads about the experiments the Inquisition would perform on what they considered to be impure races. Juniper remembers how the children at the orphanage were pleasant at first, then very suddenly became cruel, often after talking to adults dressed in Inquisition clothing, who would observe the bullying without interfering.

Z goes to Theran and tells him about her dream about the perfect planet, where she saw other people like her. Theran tells her he's seen very few people like her.

They hear the guard outside their door being attacked, and Juniper hears an electronic device being attached to the door. Everyone takes cover, and Z pushes the couch against the door just before it explodes. Three people enter, one holding a gun to a stunned Z's head.

### New Information

* Martle seems to have a thing for uniforms.
* The Shattered Glass event was so named because the planet literally shattered like glass. Over 9 billion gnomes died that day. Gnomes have been trying to find a new perfect planet, but Theran hasn't heard of any success.

## Memorable Quotes

**Jason**: She's gonna drink the olive brine, don't let her do it.

**Z**: I whisper sweet sweet nothings to it.

## Trivia

* This is the first episode with Eric.
* Rebecca can do a very good Gollum impression.