Wombat

Wombat is the first chapter in The Wombles One. If you were looking for the character, see Tobermory Womble.

“Wow!” said Peter after poking his head out over the fence.  “You are really fat!”  The fat person (well not really a person) stopped in his tracks.  He turned around slowly, and threw his straw boater at them with rage, then leapt on them and wrapped his red, white striped scarf around their mouth.  Then he headed down into a burrow, and pretended it had never happened.  He was immediately greeted by another one of those creatures, who was slightly smaller, and was wearing a cap.  “Hello!” they said.  “I’m under house arrest, so I can’t come out of the burrow.” “House arrest?!?! Whatever for?” gasped the one that was first mentioned.  “I’m suspected of the murder of Alderney!”  “Alderney’s been murdered?!?!” “Yes. \*sniff\*” “You wouldn’t have done it! You lo…” “Shut up, Orinoco!”  “But there’s no one here, Bungo!”  “Someone might be hiding!”  Suddenly one of the suits of armour on display next to them seemed to start to move. It took its helmet off, and the head of a womble wearing a bowler hat and with a screwdriver tucked behind one ear, and a pencil behind the other emerged! “Told you so!” said Bungo. “Tobermory probably heard our whole conversation!” “Yes, I did.” He said.  “I hope you two wombles weren’t talking about any secrets!  Anyway, I’ve got to get to work!” and he walked off.

Peter wondered where the really fat not really a person had gone.  He hopped over the fence to the common and investigated.  He found funny looking foot prints.  At least they might have been.  Peter followed them but lost the track at a place where there were just marks from a rake.  He shrugged then hopped back over thinking it was a badger.  As Peter ran back up his garden he tripped over.  An angry badger growled at him.

Tobermory looked very serious at Orinoco.  “Young womble!  You were seen by a human and have twice the work to do.  Come on get wombling!”  Orinoco didn’t hear because he was having forty winks.  Tobermory clunked him on the head with his bowler.  Now Orinoco was unconscious!  Bungo piped up brightly “Now YOU will have to work twice as hard. He is going to have a million winks now!”  Tobermory stomped off with the tidy bag of Orinoco and Bungo’s basket.

Shansi came into the dormitory with a hot acorn juice and a note.  Bungo took the note and thanked her for the drink.  This is what the note said …

COUSIN YELLOWSTONE WOULD LIKE TO SEE YOU AND ORINOCO AGAIN.  COULD YOU COME AND SEE US ON THE WEEKEND? YOURS TRULY, IDAHO.

Bungo immediately started writing a reply. It said:

I WOULD LOVE TO COME, BUT I AM AFRAID I CAN’T. I AM NOT ALLOWED TO LEAVE THE BURROW. I’LL EXPLAIN ANOTHER TIME. MAYBE ORINOCO MIGHT COME THOUGH.  BEST WISHES, BUNGO.

Suddenly Tobermory came in. “What are you doing back already?” asked Bungo. “You’ve still got three hours of work left!” Tobermory grunted, and went back out, whilst Bungo tried to hold in a giggle.  Then Shansi took Bungo’s glass back, and brought it back to the kitchen for Madame Cholet to wash up.  She sighed as she did it, and muttered, “I wish I could still have Alderney helping me.”

Tobermory was grumpy. Very grumpy.  He was stomping around very moodily kicking the occasional squirrel or badger until he found a very curious bag.  As the bag was opened something black poked out.  He pulled it out.  It was a cape.  Tobermory put it on.  Next he found a black balaclava.  He put that on.  After that he found black gloves and wellies.

He went to look at himself in Queen’s Mere.  Tobermory liked what he saw.  “Mmm I look like some kind of super womble!”  He said to nobody.  “What I need now is a super womble name.  Let’s see it’s dark so Panther Womble?  No! Sooty Womble?  No!  The Dirty Womble?  No! Nightwatchman Womble? “.  Tomsk appeared behind him.  “That’s me!” he said making Tobermory jump.

“I suppose it is Tomsk. What’s that you’ve got.”  Tomsk showed Tobermory a bag with green shorts, a red waistcoat, green mask and yellow cape.  He put them on.  “Now I’m a super womble!  Can I be your helper?”  Tobermory was in a better mood now.  “Of course but first my name.  Let’s see then maybe something with bat?”  Tomsk suddenly shouted “Got it!  I remember something from Australia.  Wombat!  Like a womble and a bat!”

Tobermory loved it. “Now for your super womble name Tomsk.” They spent ages and ages wondering about it then eventually Tobermory said, “That’s it! You can be the Womble Wonder!” “Ooohhh, I like it!” said Tomsk.  Suddenly they heard Great Uncle Bulgaria’s voice calling, “Dinner time!” An enormous smile appeared on both of their faces, and they ran towards the dining room, singing, “Dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner!”  They sat down and ate rather quickly. Dessert was a banana split.  They then started singing, “Nana nana nana nana nana nana nana nana nana nana nana nana!” Great Uncle Bulgaria hadn’t a clue why!  Then something else confused him. “Why is Orinoco not here? He’s usually the first to come!” “Well,” said Bungo. “He’s just having a million winks.”  “A million? I’m used to him having forty winks, but a million? That’s absolutely ridiculous!”

Word got around about Tobermory’s super womble alter ego.  Most of the wombles knew it was Tobermory but Cousin Botany spent most of this time outside gardening.  So naturally he had not heard much.  He did however hear a little bit of the story.  Enough to know that a wombat was on Wimbledon Common.  Quickly he headed to Tobermory’s workshop.  “Gooday Tobermorey!  Can I have two nets, strong rope and heavy weight?”

“I’ll never understand your gardening Botany!  Tsk tsk tsk, alright then give me a minute.”  He busily went to fetch the nets, rope and old anchor.  “Here you are then.  Now mind you don’t disturb me for a good while I’m working on the Wo, er, Silver Womble!”

Botany went away to build a wombat trap with his net, rope and anchor.  Meanwhile Tobermory worked on changing the Silver Womble to the Wombatmobile!”