Episode 245 - A Bad Dream

## Intro

**Episode description:**
n/a

**Opening Quote:**
**Sean**: I have more iron in one chest than you've had in your entire game.

**Player introduction:**
**Sean**: Hello and welcome to another episode of the Tabletop Champions podcast, I'm Sean your dungeon master and with me tonight I have Stephanie who plays Kuviana...
**Stephanie *(in Kuviana's voice)***: Ahoy-hoy!
**Sean**: Kyle who plays Barry Dingle...
**Kyle**: \*seltzer can opening\* Grip it and rip it!
**Sean**: Grip it and rip it. Matt who plays Wrath...
**Matt *(in Wrath's voice)***: For glory!
**Sean**: Ophe- uh, Lauren who plays Ophelia...
**Lauren**: What do you call a warforged bard? A social construct!
**Matt**: Booooooo.
**Sean**: And Ben who plays Balinor.
**Ben**: Hello.

## Episode Summary

### Old Haven crypts

The episode opens with the party in the crypts below Haven's older graveyard. It's dry and dusty, and there's a blue light coming from the hallway to the north. Kuviana stealths ahead and sees three decorated coffins: two small ones flanking one larger coffin. The large coffin has a crown inscription, the left coffin is carved with an owlbear, and the right coffin is carved with a fist holding a sickle wreathed in a wheat sheath. Beyond the coffins is a statue of a hooded figure holding a blue lantern. The owlbear coffin contains Lux, the middle one has Stark, and the last one is dedicated to Colin. The statue is faceless. Kuviana takes the lantern and gives it to Ophelia, then explores the rest of the crypt, finding nothing of note. They go to pay their respects to the fallen heroes, and find that the coffins are only visible when the blue lantern light is shone on them. With this revelation, they explore the rest of the crypt using the lantern, now in Barry's possession. They find a large room to the north with murals on the walls. The north wall depicts a group of adventurers fighting an undead creature and an otterfolk: the battle against Siloqui and Alenia143. Kuviana discovers that Siloqui is carved from a separate piece of stone, and when she touches it, it opens up to another room. Inside are a blanket, some food and water, and writing on the wall saying *"Don't trip this time."* In the blanket is a folded note labeled *"OBB."* It reads,

> “*To the Owlbear Bureau,
> Late as always. Come find us for your prize. He is safe.
> TT
> P.S. Try not to trip on the steps to our hideout.*”
>
>
>

Before setting off to find the hideout of the Twinkletoes Gang, they explore the rest of the crypt. They find a skeleton lying on a stone table. Whoever it was had been restrained by shackles that seem untouched by time. They don't have a traditional lock, so Barry takes them off around the bones. Balinor finds a key, a star-shaped device that taps against a star-shaped indentation in the manacles to unlock them.

### Return to the Bear Owl Bureau

They get back to town around 10:30 at night. Balinor had thought to ask Cynthia Oathheart where to find the *Twinkletoes Gang*, but given it's so late, they decide to go to bars and listen for anyone who seems to know something. They arrive back at the Bear Owl Bureau to find the door open and muddy footprints leading out. Kuviana sneaks in and finds that the place is wrecked. Welsh is tied to the stuffed owl with a scroll in his mouth and a note on his chest. The note reads *"Sorry for the mess, but you hassled my crew. Here's a place for you to sleep tonight."* The scroll has the spell *Tiny Hut*. They make sure Welsh is okay, and send him up to take a bath before he cleans up the literal shit thrown all around the room. Balinor uses *Prestidigitation* to clean up his desk specifically. Wrath is badly injured, but they decide the matter can't wait, so Balinor goes to talk to Cynthia, with everyone following as backup. Kuviana unbuttons some of his shirt buttons and tousles his hair first.

### Meeting Cynthia Oathheart

Balinor leads the way to the address in *Ivyplace*, which appears to be the headquarters for the Haven Quill. Cynthia is home and invites him in, and he sees a lavish manor with many quills magically writing out tomorrow's edition of the *Quill*. Cynthia sets a magical string quartet playing and summons her servant Dalward, a squat dwarf dressed in very fine clothes, to bring tea. Balinor asks about her connections, and she attributes most of them, and her wealth, to her late husband, an adventurer of great renown. They talk about Timmy Twinkletoes, who Cynthia calls a gentleman. She refuses to say his location, but Balinor persuades her to set up a meeting between them. She says he must go alone, and that she'll set up a meeting tomorrow. She bids him good night, saying she'd like to see him again, alone, and he agrees. Balinor emerges to see Wrath and Barry failing to hide, with the rest of the group behind a bush. They return to the Bureau and debrief, then go to bed.

### Secret Scenes

#### Wrathful

Wrath dreams that he is the conductor of a group of floating instruments that are playing themselves. The song sounds familiar. He almost grasps what the song is, but makes a mistake near the end, and all the instruments stop and fall to the ground. Wrath wakes up to see it is dawn, and he has an extra use of *Bardic Inspiration*.

#### Lilith

After Ophelia falls asleep, Kuviana (actually Lilith) astral projects to the shadowy place. Seelo joins her, and tells her what happened with Joaquin is all part of the plan. They have more spies within the city than Lilith realizes, and they are all working to acquire *"this item"* for themselves. They had Timmy find the child as a means for him and Lilith to meet. The real Timmy has been acquired and replaced, and is locked in the same place as the real Kuviana. The spy Timmy will ask the Bureau for a favor, as a pretext for him and Lilith to work together to discover the location of the pieces of the lost Oculus, or where they were in Irulan before its destruction. Lilith is to report back in three days.

## Memorable Quotes

**Ben**: You have an ability that's extremely relevant right now.
**Stephanie**: I know, I was just about to say that. So, thank you, one second, while I click, and...
[...]
**Stephanie**: the fuck - what is it, Ben? Like, Natural Explorer?
**Ben**: Ah, no.
**Stephanie**: No, that's not it.
**Ben**: Should be one of the last ones on your list, I think? I don't have access to your sheet right now.
**Stephanie**: Ohh, Lightbearer? No, that's light. Do I want that one?
**Ben**: No not that one.
**Lauren**: No.
**Ben**: Okay maybe - maybe before that one. I don't -
**Stephanie**: Healing Hand. Done.
**Ben**: - Steph I don't have access to your sheet.
**Stephanie**: I know! That's why I asked you! Hold on.

**Stephanie**: You try to pick him up, you're probably gonna die.
**Kyle**: Mmhm.
**Stephanie**: Like he's got some kind of booby trap, or something that will close on you.
**Kyle**: For sure. For sure. And it's not even that they're gonna go off defensively, it's just you're pushing on things that are not designed to be pushed on. Things are gonna pop and crack and just like, shit's gonna happen.

**Kyle**: Listen Sean, just cause you didn't smoke weed before trying to say it doesn't mean you're better than me.

**Wrath**: Uh, I'm up for a fight, but I'm not exactly in the best fighting condition.
**Matt**: I say as blood spills onto the floor.

## Trivia

* Kuviana has *Umbral Sight*, and is invisible in darkness to those whose sight depends on Darkvision.
* This is the first episode with Dalward, Cynthia Oathheart's servant.