92. The Umbral Market: Arrival

* Aerendyl, Clwyd, Pyt, and Wilfred, accompanied by the fire giant Ingvild, the vampire Zadimus, and the winter eladrin Ilphas, all stepped through a doorway into the shadows underneath a bridge spanning the River Styx and entered the Umbral Market.
	+ They see the doorman, the hulking iron golem with a voice that whistled like a tea kettle, filing their entrance contracts away in its chest as they walked passed.
	+ Before them stretches the strangely flat-looking realm of the Umbral Market. Two dozen shops, stalls, buildings, or entrances of various sorts are arranged around a circular plaza. In the space's centre sits an impressive water fountain with a moving scarecrow stuck in place at one side. The ground below them features no shadows; instead they see a warped, two-dimensional view of the underside of the Aranok Bridge as viewed from the perspective of the market's entrance.
	+ Customers of all sorts hurry around the market, apparently snapping up some last minute deals. A couple stall keepers panic as they pack things away and rush for the entrance.
	+ They're soon greeted by the smiling face of Ringleader Ibrahim, a copper-skinned human man and the person in charge of the Umbral Market. He bids them welcome and tells them if they seek lodgings and a length of stay with the market, they should head to his personal establishment, Rhapsody in the Shadows. It's not only a beautiful hotel with bespoke rooms available, but also sports a common room for music, drinking, and conversations, a spa with all manner of treatments mundane and exotic, and a casino.
	+ The party and their allies head into the middle of the strange space and the scarecrow calls out to them in a jolly voice. They talk to it for a little bit, but while the conversation starts out merely vapid, it quickly becomes creepy as the scarecrow keeps muttering things quickly and quietly -- things like '*getoutwhileyoucan*!' and '*dontleaveme*!' They walk away from the weird thing, but it does make them think.
	+ Zadimus takes Ilphas, saying he fancies a drink and will be content for the party to look around and tell him what's on offer afterwards. Ingvild goes with the vampire, and the three of them head to Rhapsody in the Shadows.
* When the group have been inside the market for a little while, they hear a whistle sound from the top of Rhapsody in the Shadows. The bulk of the crowd milling around the market hurries to the exit. Ten minutes later and the whistle sounds again, indicating the market is about to push off from its current position. People rush out the shadowy entrance-exit, with a couple of them cursing as they're caught on the inside. Most of those that remain direct their attention to the floor, where they can see the market hopping from shadow to shadow and clandestinely making its way about Dis.
	+ The promised raven with a broken eye swoops under the Aranok Bridge and the market hops to its shadow, where it rushes over streets and buildings -- though the view on the ground shows the towering buildings stretching up to the sky filled with red and black clouds, as if one were lying on the ground and looking up.
	+ From the raven, the market hops into the shadow of a Hell Train as is screeches around a corner and then hurtles through Dis.
	+ Eventually, the train comes to a stop and the market rides away in the shadow of tiefling scribe rushing along.
	+ The tiefling boards a boat on the Styx and the market settles into the vessel's shadow. When the boat pushes off, the view on the ground is looking up from the bed of the Styx. The boat and the shimmering surface of the water are somewhat distant things, seen now through the pale blue lens of the water. Occasionally, spectre-like humanoid shapes drift past in front of the boat.
	+ Ringleader Ibrahim declares the market safely 'away and away'!
	+ Those patrons that remained in the market go back to their browsing. The party join them.
* One by one, the party experience the weird, eccentric, unique vendors of the Umbral Market:
	+ **Troll Meat**: a group of troll chefs hack bits of their own flesh off onto sizzling hot plates. While they cook the meat, their wounds regenerate. One troll calls out 'yes boss!' to the group as they step in!
	+ **The Biggest Bug Emporium**: a tall, hunchbacked, warty fomorian hosts a massive array of beetles in this strange shop.
	+ **Mimicry at its Finest**: a charming dark-skinned human man by the name of Ignatius oversees this shop. What looks like a haberdashery or knickknack shop at first turns out to be something like a pet shop, for each 'item' inside is actually a mimic! Ignatius recommends new owners start with a small one.
	+ **Day and Night**: a charming, salt-of-the-earth golem-like construct by the name of Kin runs this shop, though she's busy fixing her construct cat when the party arrive; it had fallen in the Styx, not for the first time apparently. The left half is bright as the noonday sun while the right is as dark as a moonlit night. On the walls on either side, racked up like wine bottles, Kin has bottled sunlight and midnight respectively. They're under high pressure so they release with some force when the corks are removed.
	+ **The Yee-Haw!! Infernal Ranch**: through a large archway in the market's shadowy wall, a sweeping prairie landscape awaits. Skeletons ride on burning nightmare horses, herding stench kows, while a big barn in the distance houses abyssal chickens. In a nearby field, an infernal engine fashioned into a combine harvester waits. The party are told the place gets by selling premium quality infernal meat and dairy products, but in asking if they're looking to buy or to pitch in, the skeleton ranch hands reveal that the place is always looking for able bodied workers -- and it might be a good way to make some soul coins while they're in the market.
	+ **Sammy's Scapegoats**: inside a dimly-lit bungalow filled with shag carpets, rugs, beanbags, and textured curtains, a male hell hag by the name of Sammy fashions all manner of things into little humanoid-shaped dolls. Each of these is a scapegoat, and Sammy rents out their use to customers. By weaving a strand of hair inside, customers can gain temporary hit points or death wards for as long as they're willing and able to play. Sammy also offers the group and bowl to smoke at no charge. He didn't much feel like getting up from his bean bag.
	+ **Molly's Candlesticks**: in a quaint little house, a young gnomish lady by the name of Molly Glittergem makes magical candlesticks that offer a variety of aura-like effects in the area their light shines. Through the windows, her back yard appears to be yellow-coloured rolling hills; these are apparently 'a piece of the Golden Hills', the folkloric ancestral homeland of the gnomish people, which Molly's parents somehow brought with them from Faerie.
	+ **For Pot or Pet!!**: A sturdy human woman holds a kitten up in one hand, a puppy in the other, and hollers out 'For! Pot! Or! Pet!' and 'Mix and match! Four for a soul! Puppies, kittens, piglets!' Her shop is little more than a table and her young wares scurry about in cardboard boxes underneath.
	+ **Meat N Bones**: A polite, portly half-elf man in a bloody butcher's apron runs this place. Various bins and tubs line the place, filled with assorted bones and meat. He offers bulk deals for necromancers, and a lucky dip in his humanoid skull bin for anyone interested in casting *Speak With Dead*.
	+ **Stalkers on Demand**: a creepy human man quickly invades the personal space of any that dare enter this large tent. While he gets in your face, you may notice the glyphs drawn in goat blood, the candles placed at the corners of the design ready to burn, and the old tomes of ritual spread about the place. For a small fee, this guy will summon an elemental known as an invisible stalker and send it after anyone you desire, so long as you provide a sample from them: this could be hair, fingernails, semen, blood, urine, semen, faecal matter, spit, or semen. Anything really.
	+ **Werebeasts? Here Beasts!**: a moody grifter of a goblin called Champ runs this menagerie. One side of the room is lined with caged up werecreatures -- he's got werebears, werewolves, wererats, wereboars, and even a wereraven. Champ sells a bite from one of them to humanoids for 1 soul each, but his signage makes it clear he doesn't offer any sort of curse removal in the event of buyer's remorse. The other side of the room houses the caged animals Champ is selling. He's got a bunch of sickly pseudodragons in tiny cages, about a dozen clawfoot lizards -- suitable for riding by Small creatures, though the saddle isn't included, two angry wyverns Champ insists only need a firm hand to do you right, and two 'war gorillas,' giant apes that have been clad in armour and taught to follow commands. Champ also makes it clear they too require a firm hand.
	+ **Percival's Potent Potions**: Inside this nice little shop, the human owner Percival mixes up his latest batch in a cauldron. His wares are on display both through a glass counter and on the back wall, and he's got some very potent effects on offer!
	+ **The Master Gemsmith's Quarry**: on the other side of a shadowy tunnel, a stone quarry stretches out to the distance! Earth elementals and mephiti work tirelessly to grow and harvest gems of all sorts, while the master gemsmith, a Dao genie by the name of Fatima Galina Fayyad Ibnat Tabira, is ferried about by a dust mephit that carries the ornamental urn t he genie is attached to. Fatima both buys and sells gems of all sorts and also offers gem-related services and the sale of gems of earth elemental summoning.
	+ **Mr Delicious' Mushroom Room**: step into the weird world of shisha-smoking myconids and listen to the incomprehensible patter of this mask-clad mushroom salesman. His dried shrooms are sure to make an impression on spellcasters in particular, when they start warping the effects of spells cast while the person is tripping.
	+ **Cully of Wid**: on a humble stall at the side of the market, the renowned wanderer of the planes, a tall, lean man named Cully of Wid plies his trade. The irises of his eyes are a prism, with a ring of indigo-blue on the outside, coloured layers cascading inwards in the order of the rainbow, and with orange-red rings resting next to his pupil. His braided white hair is tied back, and the seven Transmuter Stones taken from slain wizards he has tied at their ends clack as he turns his head about. The table is strewn with magic items and accoutrements taken from two wizards Cully of Wid has recently slain, and when the party approach and begin browsing, they do so alongside another customer, a dark-skinned, grey-furred firbolg wizard.
	+ **Sweet Dreams**: In a gingerbread house, a couple of hell hags, Willow and the Hagman, offer their dream therapy solutions. Through the husbandry and shepherding of their clients dreams, they offer some remarkable services, from restorations to mind blanks and even the bettering of ability scores for a limited time.
	+ **Glotoneria**: In a beautiful dining hall, two cambion siblings -- a man and a woman -- offer the food of their clients' dreams. Both are gorgeous, with coal-black skin, six fingers on each hand, and cloven hooves for feet, with black leathery wings sprouting from their shoulder blades.
	+ **Tatiana's Fortunes**: this charming stall, ran by the tiefling Tatiana, offers customers the chance to peer into the future through its proprietor's wonderful fortune telling. Tatiana is happy to do this with her crystal ball, knucklebones, burnt tortoise shell, palm reading, or card reading. Whatever the client prefers.
	+ **The Mask Maker**: the owner of this shop sells a great many carved wooden masks, both mundane and magical. Visitors to the shop are likely to encounter her with no face, since she's fond of taking it off and touching up the carvings on it. Beware the angry sentient mask that hangs near the shop's entrance. It's rude and quite mean.
	+ **The Keysmith**: this shop is ran by a pretty ambivalent person. You're unlikely to succeed in rousing their interest in any real way, but they have keys for sale that match thousands of different locks through the realms, and they'd be willing to carve bespoke if you knew the details of the lock you were interested in opening. Further, they have a number of quite interesting magical keys for sale too!
	+ **In Imps We Trust**: the market's post office, staffed entirely by imps. A chorus of 'hiyas' meet you as you walk through the door, and though they're often a queue, it tends to move quickly. The imps will deliver letters for 1 soul and small packages for 5 souls. They can deliver to anywhere in Dis by next day but guarantee only within the next 7 days for other layers. Would-be customers should be careful not to overstep any contracts they've already signed in the market when using the post office, particularly in regards to deals about disclosing information. If necessary, request a later delivery date!
	+ **The Plagueman's Pawn Shop**: in this small, dingy, dank and narrow shop waits the Plagueman, a member of the shaytan, the soulless; specifically, one of those most fascinated by disease and illness. The Plagueman doesn't seem to care much for the infernal trade of souls, though it has a number of interesting items in its shop. More often than not, it's willing to buy interesting things from those that pass by as well. People heading to the swamps of Minauros might be interested in some of the special deals the Plagueman offers in exchange for people agreeing to carry new diseases through the swamp hell with them as they go.
	+ **The Flaming Heart**: this forge is the workspace of an azer father and daughter team, though they're assisted by a number of firesnakes. They work all manner of magical metals: glassteel, mithral, adamantine, orichalcum, cold iron, sylvanium, and infernal iron, to name just a few! Their skills are remarkable.
* By the time they've finished looking around, some of the party have already made a few purchases:
	+ Clwyd buys 6 lucky dip humanoid skulls from Meat N Bones.
	+ The party also sell the amnizu corpse to the guy for 32 soul coins and another lucky dip skull.
	+ They sell the jailer amnizu's gem-studded key to the Master Gemsmith for 15 soul coins.
	+ Clwyd buys two lots of 3 dried mushrooms from Mr Delicious for 1 soul coin each, one for herself and one for Wilfred.
	+ Pyt buys 'the Changing Face' from the Mask Maker for 18 soul coins. When attuned to it, it will allow him to cast *Disguise Self* at will.
	+ Wilfred buys 'the Mask of the Deep' from the Mask Maker for 10 soul coins, which will allow him to breathe underwater when he wears it.
	+ Clwyd buys two artistic non-magical masks from the Mask Maker for 1 soul coin: a haunting butterfly-humanoid-face hybrid mask and a demonic oni face.
	+ At the Plagueman's shop, the group sell a bunch of stuff: the arcane boomstick and the wrist-mounted flamethrower they'd taken from the bounty hunter known as the Tinker, the puzzle box and the sundrop within, the Amnizu's taskmaster whip, Aerendyl's Collar of the Hound, and Aerendyl's Brimstone Cloak of Protection. In return, the Plagueman gives them 320 soul coins.
	+ Additionally, the Plagueman explains that if the party were to become vessels for one of his blank-slate disease cultures and then carry it through Minauros, apparently a fascinating, foul environment that would allow the disease to grow and flourish, potentially into something entirely now and as-yet unseen, the Plagueman would give them things of their choosing from his best wares in exchange. All they had to do at this stage was agree to take in the culture, keep it with them as they travelled through Minauros, and then meet up with the Plagueman in Legion, the Second Hell, where it would take the developed disease back and they could have their item. Since the Plagueman was offering potent spell scrolls, sovereign glue and universal solvent, urns for growing one's own clone inside, and a killing word in a box, the party were quite interested.
		- Clwyd took 2 diseases in, indicating that she was interested in the Killing Word and then one of the more potent spell scrolls.
		- Aerendyl took in 1 disease, saying he was interested in a clone urn.
		- Wilfred took in two diseases, interested in a clone urn and the combination of a Scroll of Contingency and the fashioning of the expensive and intricate component to cast the spell.
		- Pyt took in one disease, interested in the two doses of sovereign glue and universal solvent the Plagueman was offering.
* When they'd been once around the market, the group went to Rhapsody in the Shadows, the establishment owned and run by Ringleader Ibrahim himself.
	+ The ringleader was ready and waiting for them inside. He has them all sign simple contracts that stipulate each of them must pay in full their bills when their stay with the Rhapsody in the Shadows comes to an end, but that at any point, Ringleader Ibrahim can demand they settle their bill as it currently stands.
	+ He offered them the deluxe course of rooms or the standard course. The group quickly discussed it and opted for the standard course. Though the deluxe was tempting, they wanted to save their money for buying things in the market. With that, they secure rooms for themselves, Zadimus, Ilphas, and Ingvild.
	+ The party pay Ibrahim a fee of 5 soul coins and then sign a contract to learn how long it will be until the market stops at a location near an exit to the Third Hell. The contract stipulates that they shall remain within the market at least until the market arrives at this location and that they won't tell anyone what they learn. Once they've signed, Ibrahim informs them that the market will arrive near the Cocytian Docks 69 nights hence.
	+ They then go to the common room, where they see some interesting characters. A group of minstrels, made up of a satyr, a deer-centaur, a goblin, a dwarf, and a skeleton are jamming. Two beautiful angels are keeping to themselves; one remains silent but the other talks as if having a two-way conversation all the same. A tiefling woman mutters feverishly to herself while she scrawls maps. And Zadimus is here, drinking blood from a glass. He tells them he'd already sent Ingvild to the spa to have her size reduced a bit and to have her tongue regrown.
	+ The party get Zadimus to come to their rooms and they begin discussing their plans -- the pressing issue was that Aerendyl had signed a contract with the archdevil Dispater to sell out this market, but the contracts they'd already signed in the market didn't offer much wiggle room in getting information back out again.
	+ With the contract Wilfred had taken from Mephistopheles's hall of records, Pyt figured out that he can destroy any infernal contract he touches as a result of the genie wish. The party consider this in their plans.