The Burger King

The Burger King's Tupperbox profile picture

### Occupation

First Guardian of Gallifrey, Mascot of Burger KingTM, Exterminator of Kryptonians and Trolls Alike

## Physical description

### Species

First Guardian, Time Lord, Dead Cow(?), Alarm Clock(???)

## Appearances

### Portrayed by

Average Mayor Enjoyer

> You cannot arrest me! I am Burger King!
>
> Burger King, loitering at a Wendy's on 14 June 2023 at 1:07 AM

**The Burger King** is a recurring character in *The Breaking Bad Roleplay*, played by Average Mayor Enjoyer (otherwise known as AwdryFan1997). He first appeared on 18 February 2023.

Burger King, while usually amiable, is a villain. He seeks to conquer as much of the universe as he can, with or without the help of various lackeys he has enlisted. His past and present minions include the likes of Hoxton, Wolf, and notably Pitou. Burger King is extremely prejudiced against trolls and Kryptonians due to their role in the destruction of his home planet, Gallifrey. A Kryptonian known as Kal-El, recognized by the other characters as the comic book hero Superman, followed Burger King into the Nexus, where they have been trapped ever since. Burger King is also being monitored by various incarnations of the Doctor, who were sent by the Time Lords of their universe to learn of how the Burger King's Gallifrey was destroyed so that the mistake can not be repeated in the Doctor's universe.

## Origins

> I am the Burger King, First Guardian of the planet Gallifrey in the constellation of Kasterborous. My planet was wiped out by the warlords of Krypton and their allies, and I have been denied the powers of the Green Sun. I seek revenge not only on behalf of the Time Lords but also on behalf of myself and the authority I once wielded. And soon, I shall rule again. They will rue the day they trifled with me. They will regret fucking with ***the Burger King!***
>
> Burger King, monologuing to Hoxton and Dallas shortly after his introduction.

The Burger King, like all First Guardians, was created in a laboratory in a Sburb session played by a group of young Time Lords. When the meteors from the Reckoning began to rain down on Gallifrey, they were mitigated by the great power of the Time Lords that everyone keeps talking about. The Burger King takes credit for Gallifreyan civilization, which was developed and founded by his ectobiological clone fathers Omega and Rassilon.

Gallifrey's only rival in the universe was the planet Krypton, which began to threaten the supremacy of the Time Lords. This rivalry eventually escalated into a great Time War. While the almighty Time Lords were initially able to defend themselves, (partly due to the aid of the Burger King himself) the military dictatorship of General Zod and his powerful supercomputer Brainiac began to match their strength. To counter this, the Time Lords began allying with various lesser civilizations of the cosmos, including the Troll Empire that originated from Alternia. However, the trolls would later switch sides at the most inopportune moment, and the combined strengths of the trolls and Kryptonians would finally overpower Gallifrey. Every last known Time Lord would be exterminated, leaving the First Guardian Burger King as the sole survivor of the war. To prevent Burger King from taking revenge, General Zod blotted out the Green Sun that gave him his powers.

## Appearances in the BBRP

Burger King first appears during an in-universe episode of *The Twilight Zone,* where, after being threatened with a gun by Hoxton, offers him and Wolf immortality and an entire planet to rule over. He also claims to know "the secrets of the universe" as well as Hoxton and Wolf's futures. Wolf and Hoxton reluctantly follow Burger King into a Burger King, which is actually his TARDIS. They then take off, with their intended destination being Brazil.

### The Eternal Prisoner of the Nexus

> First you insult my alarm clocks, next you gaslight me about a payphone, then you fatshame me and now you punch me in my face. [...] You're lucky you're not a troll.
>
> The Burger King, arguing with rb102.

Instead of Brazil, however, the Burger King and his new minions arrive in the Nexus. Burger King gets into an argument with rb102 about alarm clocks and payphones, which ultimately gets him nowhere. Not long later, Superman enters the Nexus in search of Burger King. Burger King overhears Superman, Dallas and TG talking about him and becomes paranoid, particularly when he hears that Betty Crocker is present. It's too late by then, however, as Dallas and Hoxton reunite and Burger King meets his new nemesis- *Superman*.

Burger King and company flee to the Burger TARDIS, pursued not only by the racist Superman but by Crow Strider, an employee of Burger KingTM rival Wendy's. However, the TARDIS is unable to leave the Nexus, and so immediately returns after taking off. Fortunately, by the time they land, Superman has been imprisoned by the Thief of Time. Despite fearing "the Batterwitch", the Burger King maintains his composure in the presence of Betty Crocker. Of course, Betty is actually an alternate version of Her Imperious Condescension, and has no idea who Burger King is or why he is accusing her of slaughtering his people. Burger King berates Betty, accusing her of eating infants, "just like the Kryptonians," which is obviously not helped by Superman wanting to eat Baby Dave. Upon Burger King being called out for his xenophobia, the Thief of Time returns, which does not provoke a serious reaction from the arrogant burger man. Burger King nearly starts a gangfight when he orders Hoxton, Wolf, and Dallas to kill everyone else in the room, including Baby Dave. The Thief of Time intervenes, and locks Burger King in his own separate prison across from Superman's.

The Burger King wakes up the next morning to find both himself and his TARDIS on fire. Oliver comes to the rescue, using his rain cloud to extinguish the flames. Despite this, the fire in the TARDIS continues to spread, and ultimately renders the ship beyond repair. Burger King doesn't seem to care all that much, as he claims to know of where to acquire another TARDIS. He instead preoccupies himself with finding some Kryptonite to inhibit the powers of Superman, who is still asleep. Sketchmini, who caused the fire, is believed to be in possession of Kryptonite, however it was actually just an oversized Pop Rock that causes Superman to awaken once inserted into his mouth. In a double plot twist, the Pop Rock was Kryptonite-flavored, thus removing Superman's powers anyway. It is then that Pitou appears, and under Burger King's instructions, places Superman under mind control. Sketchmini and Pitou get into a noisy argument about the justifiability of Burger King's genocidal intentions, which attracts the attention of the Thief of Time. Not willing to go to Time Prison, Burger King promises to not commit genocide before leaving on a ship to the Green Sun. Of course, this promise was complete bullshit.

After a rough journey to the Daves, Crows, and Dirks Club to kill Baby Dave, the Burger King faints. He wakes up later to find himself and his comrades back in the Nexus. TG and the Thief of Time force Burger King and Superman to team up to escape the Nexus, so that they won't try to destroy each other, risking innocent lives in the process. Of course, Burger King declares that he's sticking to his original plan of unblotting the Green Sun so that Burger King can take down the other First Guardians and then conquer the universe. Thief of Time objects, but Superman promises to betray Burger King at the most inopportune moment. The dynamic duo then loiter around the Nexus for a while, formulating their plan. It is during this period that Burger King encounters a version of Kanaya, towards whom he is very racist. Sans then leads Burger King directly to the Green Sun, however it's revealed the blotting of the Green Sun was not a literal barrier but more like a curse specifically placed on Burger King himself. Burger King returns to the Nexus with Pitou, plotting his next move. Trying to threaten Kanaya, Burger King demands that she take him to her leader, however Kanaya has long since lost contact with her people due to multiverse stuff. Instead they obsess over Team Fortress 2 lootcrates.

### The Wilderness Years

> There is only room for ONE racist 'round these parts! Guess who just got his Green Sun powers back, bitches!
>
> The Burger King, upon his grand return to relevance.

Burger King disappeared for quite some time after this, with Average Mayor Enjoyer's sporadic appearances introducing new plotlines including the Bottle and its eight inhabitants who desire the death of the Burger King. Burger King returns when the Second Doctor enters the Nexus, seeking information about the destruction of the Burger King's Gallifrey on behalf of the Celestial Intervention Agency (CIA). Average Mayor Enjoyer then disappeared again, for much longer than his previous hiatus. When he did return, it was only briefly, and Burger King was not involved. Average Mayor Enjoyer's next hiatus would last even longer, though this time he seemed to finally return for good. The Burger King character, however, did not come back just yet. Burger King was mentioned by the Doctor as being the real reason he was sent by the CIA (to prevent him from being killed by the Bottle), however as the Bottle arc was soon abandoned this plot point was forgotten.

The Burger King would eventually return, heralded by Eggbert and Caliborn. Proudly declaring to have regained the powers of the Green Sun, he encounters the Thief of Time at a Wendy's of all places. The Thief of Time, having not seen Burger King in quite some time, had forgotten that he had escaped the prison he'd trapped him in shortly after his first appearance. Despite being omnipotent and almighty once more, Burger King is disinterested in multiversal supervillainy for the time being and instead remains affable. However, his loitering is not appreciated, and Crow Strider calls the police. Police Officer #1 chases Burger King away shortly after Superman returned.

### The Ultimate Showdown of God and Anime

Burger King would pop up again not long after, still on the run from both the police and the "greater deities" such as the Thief of Time, TG and tg. Finally reunited with his subordinate Pitou, he orders them to kill an innocent(?) child named Akko. The Fourth and Fifth Doctors intervene, and the Burger King opts to spare them because he is a Time Lord. When Pitou gets trapped in a bottle by Klein, the Burger King lets him suffer because he finds it really funny. He gets his comeuppance when Klein traps him in another bottle, one that negates his First Guardian abilities. Pitou, ever loyal, manages to get them both released. Burger King insists that the Doctors remain free, believing them to be of little to no threat.

Just then, Pitou is incapacitated by Buraiden Gai, an incredibly powerful entity who seeks to battle the Burger King. Buraiden Gai calls out the Burger King for his genocidal ambitions, to which Burger King replies by referencing dead memes. Their pre-fight shouting match would go down in history as one of the most epic moments in roleplay history. When Buraiden Gai reveals his hatred for Her Imperious Condescension, the Burger King excitedly offers to team up with him to take her down together. Buraiden Gai foolishly refuses.

The battle is seemingly in Buraiden Gai's favor. Burger King is badly wounded by a lightspeed kick and begins fleeing in terror under threat of unprofessional eyeball removal. Burger King (who chooses not to teleport away- that should've been BG's first red flag) reveals his "ultimate weapon", the Grenade Launcher of Rassilon (an alternate form of BK's duplicate Rod of Rassilon). Just as he fires, Burger King's back is crushed by his opponent (it should be noted that Sketchmini was also present, and trying to kill Burger King). Furthermore, the grenade was ineffective, so Burger King's hopes seemed to be dashed. Seemingly desperate, Burger King threatens to "frag" Akko unless the fighting ceases, however neither Buraiden Gai nor Sketchmini seem to care and continue to attack.

His assailants clearly stupid, Burger King decides that the time for mercy has passed, and reveals his true strength. He hits Buraiden Gai with an indescribable attack called "Primordial Burger" which deals more damage the lower the HP of the user (like certain moves from Chrono Trigger and other JRPGs). Deeming Sketchmini to be of little to no threat, Burger King finishes Buraiden Gai with an HP-sucking attack called "Fast Food Chain Drain". Buraiden Gai is so dead that his Tupper bot was deleted. Pitou regains consciousness, and suggests that they begin gathering weapons for future use. Burger King remembers a contact of his who owns a weapon similar to a Death Star. Burger King leaves Pitou, with the promise to return. He laughs evilly as he teleports away with his Green Sun powers.

### A Drifter Searching For a Cause

The Burger King stops by Freddy Fazbear's Pizzeria to warn the others of the Second Doctor's death. He was unaware that Superman was the murderer. He leaves immediately thereafter, as he hates pizza.

## Trivia

* russianboy102 initially disliked the Burger King character.
* Average Mayor Enjoyer is a somewhat frequent patron of Burger KingTM.
* Average Mayor Enjoyer does not remember how he came up with the idea for the Burger King character.