News At Ten

## Production

**Episode:** 11

**Date:** December 22, 1971

**Time:** 50:08

**Musical Director:**

**Vocals:** The Ladybirds

**Choreography:**

**Producer:** David Bell

**Director:** David Bell

**Writer:** Benny Hill

## Episode

* Quickie: Pub Bore
* Ballad: Gypsy Rock
* Fred Scuttle Drama Director and Dialogue Coach
* Monologue: The Dimpton Drinking Club
* The Ladybirds - Say a Little Prayer
* News at Ten
* The Great Pretender
* Bloopers - 15
	+ A Man's Life in the German Army
	+ Otto Stuk
* Tag: Sidewalk Police

## Highlights

* Fred Scuttle: Chief Drama Director and Dialogue Coach
* The Great Pretender

## Cast

* Benny Hill
* Nicolas Parsons
* Bob Todd
* Rita Webb
* Clovissa Newcombe
* Ronnie Brody
* The Ladybirds
* Bettine Le Beau
* Carol Mills
* Johnny Greenland
* Kay Frazer
* Mia Martin
* John Trayhorn
* Benjie Bolgar - (uncredited)
* Rosemary Da Costa - (uncredited)
* Leroy Hyde - (uncredited)

## Quotes

* **Benny Hill**  - "Please don't blame my doggy; it's not his fault at all. Someone left a wet umbrella standing in the hall."

* **Fred Scuttle**  - "I shot an arrow into the air; it fell to earth, I know not where. I lose more bloody arrows that way."

* **Chunky**  - "I feel like a woman."
**Fred Scuttle**  - "So do I, but after the show..."

* **Fred Scuttle**  - "Chunky, say something soft and warm as silk, and if you say teacle pudding, I'll pound you."

* **Fred Scuttle**  - "Chunky, give me two pronouns."
**Chunky**  - "Who me?"

* **Chunky**  - "I'll wear a mask."
**Fred Scuttle**  - "Oh yes, no sense in over-doing it!"

* **King Henry**  - "Look what happened at my birthday party. She sat next to me at the table, and spent all night making very strange noises."
**The Queenmother**  - "But she couldn't help it!"
**King Henry**  - "But she kept looking at me as if I'd done it!"

* **The Duchess**  - "It's straight around the corner, you can't miss it."
**King Henry**  - "I'll try not to..."

## Trivia

* The opening tag features two men in a bar (Benny Hill and Nicholas Parsons) having drinks and commenting on the bartender's (Bettine Le Beau in blonde wig) figure before needling another man's (Bob Todd) bald spot. (Clovissa Newcombe plays another patron.)
* The "News At Ten" sketch includes archive footage of Queen Elizabeth, King Philip, Edward Heath and Muhammad Ali.
* The episode features the longest queue of quickies (16) than any other episode until the December 5, 1973 episode (19). The clips include:
	+ "Es ist Eine Mann's Leif in der Deutch Armee" features snafus in a German training base (with Benny, Bob, Ronnie Brody and nine extras)
	+ "Mein Kampfe" - A German soldier (Benny) struggles with his tent
	+ "Fur Schport" - A German soldier (Benny) injures himself on the obstacle course
	+ "Ja - Joinen der Proffessionalen" - A German soldier (Benny) gets choked on his binocular by his sergeant (Bob) and hands him ice cream cones he confuses as binoculars (the female ingenue is played by Carol Mills)
	+ A contractor (Benny) aims her pointer on his assistant's (Bettine Le Beau) figure
	+ An actress playing a wind-up doll (Kay Frazer) is hesitant to have the toy maker (Benny) touching her (Nicholas Parsons and Clovissa Newcombe play the other figures)
	+ A touching commercial between a father and son (Benny and Benjie Bolgar) is marred by a brillo pad lost in the picnic lunch (Bob Todd is the production grip)
	+ Miss Dimpton-on-Sea (Clovissa) is missing a tooth
	+ The German actor playing a wind-up soldier (Benny) is grabbed by the toy maker (Bob) (Kay Frazer and Clovissa Newcombe play the other figures)
	+ Otto Stuk appears in a Barmolive commercial with his son and daughter (John Trayhorn and Mia Martin), but the product causes his glove to stuck to his face
	+ A guitar player's (Benny) foot goes through a prop chair when the singer (Bob Todd) braces on it (The dancers are Kay Frazer and Bettine Le Beau)
	+ The Black Theater - A dancer (Kay Frazer) attacks the special effects guy (Benny) after being grabbed - little realizing there's a second guy on stage (Bob)
	+ An actress (Carol Mills) gets a very noticeable stand-in arm to hold a bar of Calais soap
	+ The guitar player stumbles off stage when the singer pulls the chair out from underneath him
	+ A German bra spokes lady (Benny) has to make do with a damaged mannequin
* Ronnie Brody is better known as a regular cast member on Dave Allen at Large.
* The closing tag features a miscreant (John Trayhorn) getting chased off by two officers (Benny and Bob) from screaming lewd things at two police officers (Carol Mills and Clovissa Newcombe)

## Sequence

* **Last Episode:** Fun in the Kitchen
* **Next Episode:** Benny's All-Star Finale