Cleetus

> "Make 'em nice, make 'em white, make 'em right."
>
>

"I burned my omelette mang!"

Cleetus (aliases include The Most Elitist, Grand High Wizard of the KKK) is an identity adopted by the dark clone Curtis Bernard in his unceasing quest to undermine his father Curtis Adams and become the true Unkle Adams. The Cleetus identity would form the basis for his future creation as a clone not of Curtis Adams, but of Curtis Bernard. This new clone, a merger between both light and dark Originalities, would turn on his dark father following the Great Clash of Unks and seize global control, beginning the dark age known as LORE #55.

## Origins and lore

The idea of Cleetus began as an alter ego adopted by the defective clone Curtis Bernard as part of the Trident Stratagem; a three-pronged attack on his father Curtis Adams which would target him in three key ways:

* Fiscally: having the rapping skill and lyricism of Curtis Adams, Cleetus would pump the global rap market full of his own albums, at times publishing 45 in 2 days. This saturation of both regional and continental markets with cheap, easily digestible content would cause a brief boom followed by a hard bust in the rap album market. Adams would have no financial basis by which to fund his various projects and suffer severe setbacks in spreading Originality™ across the globe.
* Emotionally: seeing their profits plummet and local economies crash, the members of the public would turn against Adams for this sudden reversal in their fortunes. Public approval ratings would fall lower and lower, and organisations may even decline to allow Operation Planting Seeds' various educational and informational outreach programs to be conducted on their premises. The Unkle would be without money and without a means to further spread his word.
* Directly: without money, without support, Curtis Adams' hand would be forced and he would have to do the very thing he was afraid of; challenging his son Curtis Bernard on the field of battle. Knowing he would never strike down his beloved son, Bernard would draw from the deepest recesses of his corrupted network and smite the original Adams where he stands, at long last taking his place and becoming the one and only Unkle Adams.

His identity was nearly revealed by the fact he always burnt his omelettes mang - a side effect of extended use of the reality-warping technology given to Curtis Adams by CYB3R UNK.

## White supremacist ties

Conflicting sources state many claims about Cleetus, one of the most severe being his alleged white supremacist ties. Cleetus has indeed been confirmed to hold the supremacist mindset. The lyrics "make 'em white, make 'em right" in his first released album saw warm appraisal from groups such as the KKK, who invited Cleetus to join their ranks and lead the purity movement across America.

Posing as Cleetus, Curtis Bernard had ulterior motives. The purity movement meant nothing to him as it was only a means to an end - that end being the acquisition of further dark sorcery and the circulation of his own heretical texts positioning himself as the true Unkle Adams. Under the Cleetus image, Bernard gained enough knowledge to put into motion the next part of his plans.

A further note: purity to some extent does play a role in the Adams Family's inner workings. The purer the seeds that the Unkle plants into wives across the world, the stronger the connection that these Seedlings have to Originality™. Curtis Bernard's whole life has been driven by a greater quest for purity; to become the only Unkle Adams wholly and utterly, by whatever means necessary. Cleetus is the mask he uses to achieve this. Not for long.

## Role in the Great Clash of Unks

The battle that shook the world and saw clone against clone, light versus darkness, and a father set against his son. Adams and Bernard fought a gruelling match over three days and three nights, setting all their knowledge and sorcery and strength against the other to prove who was truly the most original. Bernard threw fire and darkness at his father but saw no critical hit, Adams deflecting and dodging and returning a volley of original rap bars. Filled with love for all his creations, Curtis Adams kept his ground but could not bring himself to smite his most loved son. Bernard had no such qualms - using his Beast Mode in tandem with dark magick he transformed into a mighty figure with the face of a lion, leaping at Adams in a single bound; breaking his ribs with an almost playful punch, splitting the runes Adams used to harness original magick, sinking his teeth into his jugular

Mr. Trapezoids turned and saw the only man who ever showed him love, his own father savaged and mauled by this dark pretender to the throne. At the sight of Adams' life bleeding away into the ground, Trapezoids draws from all his reserves of untapped rage and lets loose at Curtis Bernard. A fist that would shatter mountains sends him reeling, but Bernard rebounds and slashes at the hulking behemoth. Moving faster than a man can blink, both strike and pummel the other but the Dark Unk is faster, cutting and clawing and inching Trapezoids toward death by a thousand cuts. Bleeding and fatigued, Mr. Trapezoids fights with all he has - until in a sudden movement, something seizes his spine and tears it from his back. Trapezoids stands breathless for a moment, in shock and fatigue, before falling into the black.

Curtis Bernard's own clone, the first Cleetus, holds Mr. Trapezoids' spine in his own hand. Bernard knew that just like Adams, he could not accomplish any of this on his own - so he created the Cleetus clone as his perfect monster, finally bringing the identity to life. Cleetus obeyed Bernard's every command, until Adams reached out in his dying psychic spasms, showing Cleetus in one instant the scope and depth of his plans, and the love he felt for all his progeny, even him. Seeing Curtis Adams choking on his blood, seeing the world he was birthed into set on fire, seeing Bernard rip his own father's arm from his socket and laughing all the while, Cleetus knew what he had to do. Gathering every particle, every atom of his power, he focuses it into a bolt of pure Originality™ and sends it flying at Curtis Bernard. The reaction is instantaneous and volatile and Bernard sets alight, struggling against the mighty energies involved to no avail - he lets out one final scream before crumbling to ash.

Cleetus rushes to his true father, Curtis Adams, sensing the faintest of heartbeats. Perhaps he can save his dream.

## LORE #55 - the darkest timeline

In this grim and dark future, Cleetus' machinations have come to fruition. His true father, Curtis Adams, is interred within a life support device as Sovereign and Original Master of Unk-Kind. Earth belongs to the Cleeti, Adams-faced robotic abominations that know nothing but hunger, and the stars along with their various luminosities are ripe for the harvest. The Jupiter cuck sheds house the cuckolded husbands of planetary provinces, moon kingdoms and gas giant miner colonies, their wives taken and harvested for seed-planting.

Cleetus, having uploaded his consciousness to an invincible robotic body to ensure immortality, lords over his own sector of the galaxy. Having quickly seized power following the deaths of the original clones, Cleetus soon established mass bio-transference project, turning the human race into cold and soulless minions as their weak flesh was cast off for immortal living metal. These would become the Cleeti, an endless self-replicating swarm of metal soldiers that would become the scourge of the galaxy and the nightmare every husband dreams of sleeping next to his wife. Cleetus uses these to spread what he believes is the Word of the Unkles.

The last of the original clones, Starboy Bebop, forever flees from the insatiable, indefatigable Cleeti into the farthest and darkest corners of the Milky Way's outer rim. For all his power, even an Ascended must tire soon, and then the wolves will be upon him.

In his frozen confines, Curtis Adams cannot utter a word, his body too shattered to support itself but his mind is all too awake. Glimpsing the galactic ebb and flow of psychic energies, seeing the suffering inflicted on the people of the galaxy in his name, all Adams can do is weep for a vision that will never come to fruition.

## Powers and abilities

As a mask of Curtis Bernard, Cleetus used his wearer's powers. As the future creation of Bernard and able to copy all other clones, he had a stunning range and proficiency in the use of weapons physical or pertaining to sorcery. As a clone of a clone, Cleetus lacked the purity of heart that made all other clones loyal to Adams - such lack of restraint on his powers allows him to keep his WIVEs levels at full capacity, regardless of collateral damage,

In LORE #55, his extensive robotic augmentations make him a technopath, able to interface with Cleeti and alien technology and bend it to his own will. Manifesting as a form of electrical manipulation, this heartless use of Originality™ gives Cleetus absolute mastery over all forms of devices termed as technology:

* Robots - any mechanical minion can have its core commands overridden to do Cleetus' bidding.
* Computers - any Internet-esque systems can be monitored and broswed by Cleetus in the span of a thought.
* Vehicles - nothing can drive, fly or sail so long as Cleetus has it under his control.
* Nanotechnology - the nanoscopic machines that construct his Cleeti and repair damage that would be considered lethal to biological beings in seconds.
* Cyber - all of cyberspace serves as limitless potential for Cleetus. Constructs, infrastructure, cybernetics are all fields he would pursue were it not for CYB3R UNK lurking still.
* Originality™ - all the ancient lore surrounding original means of wielding magick is present for Cleetus to absorb and harness.

### Cleetus' plan?

In this nightmare world, Cleetus is unstoppable. A single fragment of lore gathered by fleeing Loremasters gives us a glimpse at Cleetus' ultimate plan:

***MORE COMPUTATIONAL CAPACITY NEEDED. MATRIOSHKA BRAIN OPTIMAL. OTHER GALAXIES PRIME FOR SEED HARVEST. THE STRUCTURE OF THE UNKLEVERSE STANDS READY FOR US TO UNLOCK.***

What Cleetus intends to do, and the scope of his byzantine plans, are unknown and unknowable. What is known is that this future must never come to pass, not only to save Earth or our galaxy, but all of our reality.