Oswlen's Journal

# The long and short rumspringer adventures of Oswlen Pinherlchick Urdbaer Jan-Satyre Fenraerl, as faithfully set down by he.

First day in the village

First day in the silly village Landed somewhere... its remote, not many trees and strange folk. Theres a small villiage set out under the sun fancy as you like. Not the only one to have arrived, there's a tall moose person, a burly thug and an ugly *Scrudgener*. Wise old crone took uncles bent nail and made a profesy...never trusted people who do that but they sent us for some reason to an 'island' to hunt for froggies. What were they expecting, the water comes up to me chin so I had to hitch a lift on the moose person names Nurlen (everyone here has such short names, its so sad they don't even perceive the loss for them) To get to the 'island' we had to use a boot which I'd only heard of as fable, silly thing like giant *dirgst* pan. We had to cross LOTS of water, never new there was so much water in the world, this must be where all the efluence flows to.

We went hunting froggies which were as big as me, I was so happy, legs the size of a roast *bungtruckle*, they didn't seem to like me eating them but they have strange ways, I'd never pass up a good pot of froggie parambula. We found two fools on the island who had lost their way, perhaps their boot was not good? we took them back to the silly sunny village (these people have no concept of propper building) We found a big coffin full o gold which the fools claimed were theirs but we divied it up between us. We also took some of them froggies back to the villiage to speak with the croney one.

Guess I'm here for now, the scudgener seams rather fixated wit me unfortunatly but I'm trying to keep my distance. May Baravar forgive my company, If this is his plan for me I don't know what he's planning. Going to fixup the space under the crones hovel to make a nice little burrow.

Gone a sailing

Set out as a group on a boot borrowed from that fishy man to go find that ‘shippe’ thingiy. Anna, Lilly, Kethnell and myself went to speak wit the fishy one in the evening, played some music (not good music) and drank some off water.

Next morning we set off in fishies boot and I was just awful in me tum, projecting over the back and trying to use the wind to push us along. In the evening Anna caught a big bloody turtle out the sea and we had turtle for sup. Stayed on an island (I am calling shippe island) lots of hooting and crokes from those giant frogies, had to tie a bell to kethnells tail (cant ever trust a *Scrudgener)* and she went and put a moustache on Anne’s face over night. There were curiouse blue green glow from where we are going tommorow.

Set for the shippe. Lots of rubbish floating and hard going to get to it. Big damn thingy, looks ancient. Tried to burn a way in wit acid but it splashed back at me, the I tried to climb up the side and fell down *again*. I am making a new rule, I do not climb! Anyway they were good enough to haul me up the side with a rope. Just went down inside free as you like even though the day turned to night as we got on board???

Found a store room and another wit some strange blue glowy honeycomb on the wall, then we got attacked by some people who were not there. Didn’t seam to be able to see us but it bloody hurt.

Surfs up?

I don’t trust Anne now, one minute we’re fighting some shadow people the next I’ve got a broken foot and she’s trying to set a fire to the ship! And there’s some blue green person with us now??? what happened! We got the boot, they lowered me down to the boot from fishy man, Kethnell jumped in the water which was just plain daft but we were in a hohar to leave, what wit the whole shipe burning like one of uncle Freddis winter watch candles.

Got away away from the conflabagration and then the thing goes and explodes. Big noise, big blue glare and big BIG wave. Lilly and me hid under the turtle shell in the boot when I up and get a divine message from Baravar, tells me to point the boot into the wave and drop the anchor...I don’t know what an ‘anchor’ is but I shouted for Anna to point the boot into the wave and off we went like in one of Aunt Shaverlands stories when she’s had some bad water.

Got washed up on the shipe island, tried to talk wit the blue boy but he can’t speak, seamed to recognise some of what I wrote on the back of the mappe but no help there. Oh yes! The map, I thought it was just a spare bit o parchment but NO, I’ve drawne a mappe on the back, don’t remember drawing the thing and it makes little sence but I have it new.

Rest of the foreign folk and the fishy one turned up after on the island, wanted to know what happened which I have no idea what happened. Most of my food is gone, I have this new mappe and have filled a bottle with this strange blue ash which came down after the shipe burned up. Anna semaed upset at what happened, tried to comfort her. Going back with the fishy one to the sunny village.

Fualls errand

After all the that ahappened last time I went out with the lot I think I’ll stick on land with Norlen, I can always trust the moose man. We (WE?) have a new house at the edge of the sunny village, its bigger then the others and more substantial but still stupid bloody people build it above ground with no try to make it blend in, I wonder about tall people? Maybe its the air up there, is it to thin?

I’ve got a burrow under the cellar under the new house. But that bug thug Tomb went and dumped a load of wood near the side and burst a wall I was working on so now I have to sure up the burrow and the hole house has a slant, plus those silly lost folk went and put the trap door to the cellar under the bars Tomb was using to hang from.

Met a fellow names Gideon Blackhawk, hope he doesn't try an sell me some religious texts, an had a chance to talk more wit Zokks, the other *Scrudgener* but he don't seem like kethell, more reliable, I know Baravar will not like it but he might be a usefull thing to have around. We all decided to go alooking for this Fuall place, I went to get some sup supplies but the folk here are not very generous to the gnomish, only got a few day sup. Found a llama to ride to I don need to walk which is sooooo good, went to see the tanner named Blannun, miserable bugger but wonderful craftsman, was able to get a lovely worked saddle for my new modus otransportus an all I have to do is bring back some nice hides for him.

Set out to find the herder man Otzi who Zokks had been wit. Went out and found him after a few days walking, on the way we found a big flock of wilde pigs, Gideon and all were trying to work out how to kill them but I just trotted up on the llama and made a pit benith a big one, good eating on that one. Took it to Otzi and found a ‘magic’ wandering river.

Got to now Zokks better, not a bad sort but Tomb went and shit turned into a bloody bear! And Norlen goes and hugs it! I thought I could trust him but no, turns out animal folk are just animals who looks like folk, or maybe its them being too high up? They would do better closer to the ground. Tomb turned back into a normal folk but can’t trust him!

Been days to get there, mostly just open lands and forest in the distance. Found some towers, made of metal and stones and really tall. Looks ancient, got to Fuall but I dont know that I trust the place. We left Otzi and his daughter a long way back. Sure I forgot somthing?

Fuall by blindfold?

So we got into Fuall, but we had to be blindfolded to do it, but I’m getting ahead of myself. We espied Fuall a day out and went on but came on a dragon bourn being harassed by another owlbear, Well we charged it or more accurately Tomb charged it and we just sort of got swept up and followed. It was too far for me to do noute but I did cast a spell which went awry and made me revisit my breakfast in a most unpleasant manner, got it all down my saddle and cloths, thank Baravar for Prestidigitation!

We met this dragony fellow who said he’s seen a man go into the town but he was blindfolded and only women were on the walls, he’s also looking for his brother I think. We got to the tree line outside the town and me an Norlen used our magic's to look like women fearing the reception we’d get being men. We up an talked to the gate guard called Duck Far Modd Fuall who seamed welcoming but said we had to be blind folded to come in. I managed to slip mine a little to spy the town and I was right, its a town! We also had these bells on which made us sound like right narnars.

The town walls were carved in figures of women fighting but it was only later we learned they weren't carved but people turned to stone! That's just not right! I know the power of living rock from my parents but they thought it was some kind of reward to be turned such. Bunch O nutters if you ask me, I realised while we were talking to Duckies old mum that we were staying with there must be a Medusa in the town though the locals call it somewhat different but still the same.

We were agone shopping when we heard he royal high and mighty come to the square and turn a man to stone for trying to divest himself of his bells. I was able to purchase a periscope which I hoped to remove the mirrors from for a last line of defence and got some more paper, still need to get a hide for the tanner.

I thought it was a bad place but then we had an audio-ance with the ‘queen’ and he’s no medusa, she’s a mad-duser and not mistaking it, totally off her hay cart. Turns out she ‘tests’ any boy born before they are five to see if they are good, if not they get turns to stone and if they are they become her sons and live to serve her. The whole place stinks, its not a town its a tomb, a giant mausoleum and I can’t wait to be gone from here and na return. She gone and asked us to bring her the hill giant ‘alive’ if you credit it or if not mearly to giver a male child under five for her to do her devilry on.

I don’t know what to do, its not rightly our business to remove her but she’s just a mad old bat but if we do remove her what will take her place, for all as bad as the situation is its the first proper town I’ve seen in this damnd place. Apparently the see nomads visit so I May be able to hope a ride back to Deratik and avoid the long way home, and I could see more of the islands too.