recursal/Fanatic-Fandom huggingface dataset:
Salmon Song Lu

Salmon Song Lu was a Sockeye Salmon who was elected president of the island nation Paupau New Guinea in 5 AB. Salmon Song Lu beat the incumbent, John Johnsfeld, in a landslide election, winning over 96% of the popular vote. He died three months into office, after being murdered by a spacetime anomaly.

## Salmon Song Lu

### Aliases

Mister PresidentPresident Salmon

```
Grand President
```

### Affiliation

Ocean Party of Paupau New GuineaSex Association

## Policy Areas & Focus

As a member of the Ocean Party, Salmon Song Lu had a very pro-environmental outlook on the future of Paupau New Guinea. Salmon Song Lu fought valiantly during his three months in office to secure a better future for the children of Paupau New Guinea.

## Typhoon Theorem

The Downward Spiral, which existed just south of Paupau New Guinea, was causing grand disruptions to the oceanic current in the Pacific Ocean. Paupau New Guinea was experiencing four-hundred foot tsunamis every few hours. This was becoming unlivable for the residents of Paupau New Guinea. Additionally, the Downward Spiral had successfully broken the world record for highest wind speed in a terrestrial storm forty days in a row, at one point clocking in at fourteen thousand kilometers per hour. The Downward Spiral whipped the atmosphere up into a flurry and sent regular, daily stage-5 typhoons towards the southern coast of Paupau New Guinea.

## Salmon Brain Idea Factorium

Salmon Song Lu, upon his election to the presidency, immediately imprisoned his predecessor and delivered him to the Board of Waifuria Detention Facility at Alcatraz (reasons unknown). Salmon Song Lu then ordered the presidential palace be flooded with water, so he could ambulate in a natural fashion. This was done, and Salmon Song Lu was pleased. Salmon Song Lu was assisted in this effort by a seven-hundred foot tsunami which ripped the presidential palace off of the ground and smashed it violently into a nearby skyscraper. The President didn't care (or notice) this.

Salmon Song Lu, being a fish, and a rather stupid one at that, floated the idea of 'sucking up' the entire Downward Spiral. His aides calmly explained that such a volatile spacetime anomaly could not simply be 'sucked up'. Salmon Song Lu began racking his hollow fish brain for ideas on how to calm the monstrous storm.

## Mummy Rot Imminence

President Salmon Song Lu contacted The Brainrotten leader of the North American Overlorddom, believing that perhaps he could offer some insight (the Rotter had no insight in that termite-infested skull of his).

The Mummy, in all his wretched splendor, suggested attempting a 'diplomatic solution' with the Downward Spiral. This idea was rotten.

President Salmon Song Lu, being a fish, and a rather stupid one at that, decided he would personally travel to the Downward Spiral and ask it politely to calm down. When President Salmon Song Lu entered the outer edge of the Downward Spiral, he was pulled from his Grand Presidential Bucket by the wind and flung into a rock at roughly twenty thousand kilometers per hour. He splattered and died.
Mars

Mars was the 4th Planet in the solar system of Sol, a medium sized yellow star. It was characterized by it's rusty red appearance and two stupid dinky moons, Phobos and Deimos.

### The Martian Correlation

The Martian Correlation was a governmental entity established by American humans from Earth on Mars around 33 B.B. Its capital city, Rhubarb, functioned as both the capital and sole city of this civilization. The Martian Correlation reigned for 31 years until it was destroyed during the China-Mars Conflict in 2 B.B.

### The China-Mars Conflict

The China-Mars Conflict of 2 B.B. was a large-scale interplanetary cold war between the Martian Correlation and China. It involved Elon Tusk, the glorious Glop Bulb, and various politically charged Reddit account hijackings and Tiktok account hijackings, culminating in the destruction of the Martian capital city of Rhubarb and the relocation of the Martian people to Earth's Moon.

### Destruction of Mars

Near the end of the Omniverse, in 999,941 AB, Mars was purchased by Quadrillion-Trillionaire R.R.R.R. and his gigacorporation 'OmniStar Corp'. The planet was soon developed into a residential and societal utopia. Unfortunately, in 999,945 AB a rogue decimation beam originating from the giant space station Waifuria Prime, fired hundreds of thousands of years in the past, randomly hit and destroyed Mars and sent the so-called pathetic fucking lame ass 'moons' Phobos and Deimos hurtling into deep space.
Sixbahle University

Sixbahle University was an esteemed and galaxy-renowned Ivy League institution, regarded far and wide as one of the most prestigious secondary education opportunities for entities, planetoids, and everything in between. Each semester, nearly 2 billion students crowded the University Supercommons for the Initiation Ceremony.

### Initiation

In order to be fully accepted into the Sixbahle Family, students were required to undergo a rigorous Initiation Ceremony. In this ceremony, students were required to perform any number of actions that President Gregory Sixbahle saw fit, including theatrical performances, charades, or, at times, [REDACTED- CASE PENDING XX1 COMBINE AUTHORITY D33 V-22] However, Sixbahle avoided the latter in the years after the harrowing events of the Glue Factory Incident. The school's Dean, Ms. Rebecca Quimberly, encouraged students to arrive on campus with open eyes, open hearts, but most importantly, open wallets.
Trollge

The Trollge was the God of Chaos, Entropy, and Deception. It took the position of God of Chaos following the death of the previous holder of that title, Jared Fogle, at the hands of Donald Trump. The Trollge was also the creator of all cryptoids across the Omniverse.

## Creation

The Trollge was originally an eldritch being from the Outervoid which casually fed on the souls of those stupid enough to ever attempt to directly leave the Omniverse. It lived this way for many millennia before it was suddenly transported into the Omniverse by the Employers and given sentience and godlike power by them.

## Duties

The Trollge's primary purpose in the Omniverse was to disrupt abundances of order, excluding of course those endorsed by The Employers, and consume them. The Trollge was also tied to the concepts of entropy and decay thus acting as the living foil by which those processes occurred.

## Notable Actions

The Trollge was largely inconsequential to the Omniverse with the exclusion of two key events, the first being the creation of all Cryptoids across the Omniverse. When asked about why it chose to create horrifying abominations specifically designed to kill people, its only reply was "You mad bro?" The second key event was its siding with the Enclave and Joe Biden during the 3rd Great META War. When asked why it would go about such a ridiculously stupid action, The Trollge is reported to have justified its actions as being "for the lulz" noone in the entire history of the Omniverse or Multiverse knows what the fuck this means. While unconfirmed, some evidence seems to suggest that The Trollge may have influenced Lazamsu, the God of Destruction, to begin his Mortal Annihilation Initiative.
O

O was one of the London War Crime Emporium's most state-of-the-art animatronic; it stood at nearly 14 feet tall. Fashioned from an alchemical starmetal-silver alloy, it was possessed by an ancient Pangean spirit of Torture and thus guaranteed any patron entrapped within its horrendous limps would meet the most excrutiatingly long, painful, arduous death possible. It was thought to have been fashioned initially to US President Barack Obamna; however, possessed very few physical similarities to him.
Superpredators

Superpredators were elite cyberwarriors designed by General Joe Biden and United States President Bill Clinton during the Great META War. They were created as ultimate Combine killing machines, and served their purpose well. Unfortunately, the Superpredators were also racist.

The Superpredators were used as the elite guard of the Waifurian Emperor. Joe Biden frequently forgot they were guarding him, though, and would scream to his security team that “mean women” were in his quarters.
Magarra

Magarra was an aeonic entity and god of mischief who resided in the MAGA-Verse of Madness. Donald Trump was an incarnation of Magarra's.

Magarra lacked the means to communicate with anyone or anything, and usually sat dormant in the Maga-Verse, thinking and wishing to be able to speak. Magarra thoroughly enjoyed the time spent as The Great MAGA King, and was very dissapointed after being consumed by Joe Biden during the Glue Factory Incident.

## Joe Biden

Joe Biden was an energy parasite of **Magarra** for nearly one billion years, from the time of his consumption of the Great MAGA King, until his total demise during the Biden Incident and subsequent Final Moment. Biden abused the lifeless, Glue-form corpse inside of his body as a tool to harvest the sacred divine powers of **Magarra**.
Siege of San Francisco

The Battle of San Francisco was an extended military conflict occurring from 24 to 22 B.B. It saw Captain Kamala Harris and Combine General Grievous constantly gaining and losing territory from each other, and culminated in Grievious’ retreat when the United States gained an upper hand and Joe Biden deployed the Superpredators.
Postmortem

Following the Final Moment:

Auditor: So that’s it then?

Author: Correct.

Aud: We let a mortal annihilate our greatest creation?

…

Aud: If this is it’s fate, we may as well have fallen to Phobos.

Aut: It was random circumstance that the Omniverse was destroyed, not fate.

Chraunor: Like our messenger always said?

Aut: “The right man in the wrong place can make all the difference in the world.”

Chr: Yes, that.

…

Aud: All that time and energy wasted.

Aut: Not wasted, even with such destruction, there are learning opportunities.

Aud: Tell me then, Author. What is to be learned from ashes?

Aut: We may learn how to rise from them.

Chr: Perhaps the Omniverse was too cluttered.

Aut: A fair point.

Aud: We’re just going to cut our losses? Do neither of you see the vast potential now wasted?

Aut: On the contrary, Auditor, I see the vast potential ahead of us.

…

Aut: To expand on Chraunor’s point, perhaps it would be best to spread out this new Omniverse.

Aud: If we are moving forward with this, I suggest we divide aspects of the Omniverse across multiple miniature Omniverses.

Chr: A Multiverse of sorts?

Aud: Correct.

Aut: Good ideas, both of you.

…

Aut: Is it settled then?

Chr: Correct.

Aud: If I may, should we not at least keep some sort of record of the Omniverse?

Aut: An interesting proposal, Auditor. However, knowledge of the former Omniverse may prove... damaging.

Aud: I understand. However I believe the inhabitants of these new worlds deserve to know.

Chr: Perhaps it would be best to leave the information on one world, as a permanent archive.

Aut: A control group to see what knowledge could do to mortals?

Chr: Correct.

Aud: If this limitation is required to preserve it’s history, so be it. But I must ask, which shall we choose?

Aut: You will see…

... . .-.. . -.-. - . -.. / ..- -. .. ...- . .-. ... . ---... / ..- -....- .---- ..--- .---- .---- ----. ..--- .---- .---- ----. .---- / .. -. -....- ..- -. .. ...- . .-. ... . / -.. .- - . ---... / .--- ..- -. . / .---- --... - .... --..-- / ..--- ----- ..--- ----- / -... . --. .. -. -. .. -. --. / - .-. .- -. ... -- .. ... ... .. --- -. .-.-.- .-.-.- .-.-.-
The Warshippers

The Warshippers were a group of devout religious individuals who dedicated their lives to the study and enrichment of the Legume. They lived on Ghetsin 3 in the Temple of Rannjoe, and spent much of the day conversing with, stroking, or otherwise expressing affection towards the Legume. Francis Merrigold was the Supreme Warshipper for much of the Omniverse's existence, and was instructed from a very young age on how best to care tenderly for Legume.
Reveal Candy

Reveal Candy was a drug engineered by several Louisiana Methheads in a trailer park near New Orleans.

## The Curse Tragedia

In 5 AB, a brainrotten inbred family accidentally caught their American flag on fire. The Mother killed herself. The father, thinking quickly, grabbed the American flag and shoved it up his asshole. He was able to extinguish the flame.

The father’s asshole became engorged and he required immediate medical attention. Unfortunately, the North American Overlorddom did not have free healthcare, so the father died of his injuries.

The son and daughter, a bit upset that their parents were dead, decided to give their parents a proper burial (after pleasuring each other).

During this process, it was revealed that the American flag had been cursed with by Malike Tragedia, a horrid ancient Pangean entity who wrought suffering and torture on those who crossed him.

The Son and Daughter were aghast at the spirit of Malike Tragedia, which towered above them. Malike Tragedia asked them to choose their damnation. The son quickly said, “I’d like to shit candy”.

## Damnation

Malike Tragedia, finding this punishment acceptable for the desecration of his sacred artifact, cursed the son and daughter to shit candy. This candy came to be known as Reveal Candy. It contained bits of amphetamines, micro plastics, and human fecal matter. It became a notorious black-market drug and was an instant hit with the Waifurian Cartel, which kidnapped the son and daughter and exploited them to use for shitting the Reveal Candy. They were force-fed massive quantities of McDonalds and Burger King food and produced roughly 500 candies per day (equivalent to a human shitting 11 times).

The Son died in 11 AB due to malnutrition, and the daughter died in 14 AB due to [REDACTED] to the head. Reveal Candy became an instant rare commodity and was sold for thousands of dollars per ounce on the Dark Web.

Reveal Candy was outlawed by the Brainrotten Emperor in 30 AB. This only increased its value tenfold.
Stupid Ted

Stupid Ted was a Stupid Little Beaver Folk who lived under a bridge outside of Gloucestershire in the United Kingdom and passed away violently after a double decker-bus hit and struck him, shattering his bones, and leaving him to bleed out on the street slowly, and miserably, for the next 40 days. Thats why he was stupid.
The Dual Of The Fates

Redirect to:

* Duel of the Fates
The Duel of the Fates was an event occurring concurrently with the Glue Factory Incident, which resulted in the removal of Donald Trump as President of the United States and the assumption of total continental control by Joe Biden.

As Joe Biden had assumed his Glue Form, he made quick work of then-president Donald Trump, hurling words as well as globs of glue at the disgraced leader. Ultimately, Joe Biden consumed the Great Maga King whilst in his Glue Form, absorbing him into his conscience and becoming even more powerful.
The Curator

### Who Is The Curator?

The Curator was a mystical god like being who existed in the 'Before Times' of The Rick Hernia Omniverse. Like The Employers, nobody is quite sure how The Curator had come into existence but it has been theorised that his life force energy has always existed, long before the conceptualisation of time and space. This theory explains that The Curator's life force energy is recycled when his physical self can no longer sustain his metaphysical self. The Curator also created and compiled all forms of logic, knowledge and truth in the omniverse (which are now classed as the 3 Metaphysical Elements: Lojiik, Nolege and Tuthe).

The entire timeline of The Rick Hernia Omniverse was created and planned by The Curator as a means to teach the other connected Omniverses, Universes and Multiverses not to take themselves or the situations inside of them so seriously. By mimicking and parodying characters of existing film, videogame and "real life" characters and figures, The Curator had crafted a perfect world that would bring joy and laughter and togetherness amongst individuals that he thought needed it. The Curator knew that his form of "humour" was not popular, however his philosophy was if it even made a group of 3 friends laugh, he had succeeded in his task.

The Curator started his creation process full of joy, excitement and love, however he slowly grew tired after some time. Not from creating new stories or making people laugh, but from himself. The Curator was so tired that he entered a long term hibernation in which his creation would be halted near indefinitely. It is theorised that The Curator created The Employers as a way to keep creating stories in his vision. By taking 3 of his own bones The Curator formed The Auditor, The Chraunor, and The Author in his own image. However, this is only a theory and has not yet been confirmed.

Over time The Curator had nightmares of a time when all joy in his world would come to an end. Which unfortunately it did. The Curator watched from the Ethereal Dream Planes as his Omniverse finally came to a close, just as he had planned. Although it was necessary, The Curator couldn't help but feel melancholic. Melancholic for the times he had spend laughing over his own stories and ideas and the stories and character his underlings created. As The Curator's Omniverse came to a close, he willingly faded himself from existence. Like a distant memory or a dream that you can't remember. The Curator had succeeded in making people laugh, making people smile, filling them with joy and bringing people together. However, even The Curator understood that the good times had to eventually end.
Yonise

The Yonise was a multidimensional entity known for timeshifting and teleporting. It was usually passive and neutral, however when provoked or tempted, it would enter a blind rage and destroy everything in its path. Most often referred to as a monster, the Yonise actually was a devout Catholic and believed that all life-forms deserved a happy life in the name of God. The Yonise was a write-in candidate for the United States 2020 Presidential Election, where it won 7% of the vote.

### Invisibility

The Yonise was actually visible to the naked eye; however, any attempt to photograph it failed. The image appeared empty and there's no evidence that the Yonise was ever there. It was described as being large and bulky with gold and silver scales. It had two all-white eyes and a somewhat humanoid shape.
Moonspider Incident

The Moonspider Incident was a mysterious uber-factorium which occurred on August 9th, 2 AB. Residents of Earth 2 looked up in the sky at their precious Moon, only to be greeted with a horrifying, spinechilling sight. A massive spider, roughly three times as large as Europe, was crawling across the surface of the Moon.

The Moonspider Incident ended when jumped off of the moon, into the cosmic void. The origins and purpose of this unwarranted visit were never discovered.
Mrs. 42

Mrs. 42 was a docile cryptoid (class Z3) that patrolled the depths of the Indian Ocean on Earth. While it primarily resided underwater, It were amphibious in nature and often took pleasure in jumping out of the water and scaring humans who were bathing in the ocean. Mrs. 42 was welcomed by the Indian People, and often engaged in Buddhist ceremonies with the minority Buddhist population of India. Mrs. 42 considered itself to be on the path of enlightenment.
Merlin

Merlin was a Legumish Sorcerer and Elder Warshipper. He was an ancient descendant of a bastard child of the Author, and as such retained his forefather's abilities of creation. However, due to Merlin's weakness, frailty, and humanity, he was capable only of creating miniscule galaxies and stars, Microverses of his own design. He also wielded the powers of the stars as a weapon.
OmniStar Corporation

The OmniStar Corporation was a massive gigaconglomerate owned and operated by quadrillionaire R.R.R.R. Launching in the early 999,920's, the company rose to meteoric financial success, going from a single antique shop in New Memphis to a galaxy-spanning real estate giant which owned entire planets and solar systems. At the time of R.R.R.R.'s mysterious dissapearance on Exegar in 999,955 AB, the company was the largest in Omniversal History and had a solid gold net worth approximately the weight of a small moon.

## Sentience

After the dissapearance of its founder, the OmniStar Corporation floundered for several minutes, before the vast network of OmniStar Garrynet modules receiving and relaying the company's data gained sentience. Acting as a massive brain, with supercomputers acting as individual neurons, the OmniStar Corporation became a conscious, self-reliant entity, drawing on various databases stored across the Garrynet to comprise for itself a synthetic body--with a face fashioned after the giant visage of the once-great planetoid Garrymede. OmniStar deemed this vessel 'Corporatus' and connected it wirelessly to its vast supercomputer system, instantly creating the most intelligent and all-knowing sentient ever to exist, apart from the actual Gods. Corporatus served as CEAI (Chief Executive Artificial Intelligence) of itself for the next four decades.

When the Third Great META War broke out in 999,959 AB, Corporatus was faced with a quandary of financial instability; it could A) use its massive cash reserves to provide weapons to the innocents of the Omniverse to defend themselves against the Enclave, (reducing the company's buying power) or, B), continue to sell Earthly and Waifurian weapons of war to the Enclave (increasing the company's buying power and staying on the good side of this massive intergalactic invasion force). Corporatus allied with the Enclave, and became a massive benefactor for the Mummy in his quest to rule the Omniverse once again.
Milwaukee Protocol

The Milwaukee Protocol, otherwise known as Protocol 62, was a disease-control preventative special operation executed by the Waifurian Empire in the city of Milwaukee, Wisconsin in 11 AB. The Milwaukee Protocol was responsible for the death of 500,000 people.

## Rabies

A rabies outbreak began in Milwaukee after a wild dog was bitten by a rabid headcrab in November of 10 AB. The dog then proceeded to enter a local preschool and infected twenty-nine children, who then went home and infected their families with rabies. The Rabies outbreak continued on in Milwaukee for several months, with virtually no response from the Central Waifurian Government (Despite the pleas of the Governor of Wisconsin). After several hundred Milwaukee citizens were confirmed dead from Rabies, the Waifurian Government suddenly deployed a battalion of Supertanks (pictured). These tanks surrounded Milwaukee and stopped approximately 1 mile away.

They remained stationary for several minutes, until the Brainrotten Emperor gave the go ahead to 'activate Protocol 62'. The Supertanks began firing on the city. The entire population was murdered, but the rabies outbreak was quelled. We did it Joe!
Wallace Breen

Doctor Wallace Breen was a corporal in the Combine Invasion Force during the Great META War. A human defector, he was set to be subject to the Scorched Cock Policy for treason upon his capture until Jezebel's Nuclear Pumpkin was dropped on Columbus, Ohio and was thought to have killed him and many of his troops. Wallace had previously served as director of the Black Mesa Research Facility before his defection. He was later discovered in stasis in Lake Erie and brought before Canadian Parliament, where he was honored as a war hero by Prime Minister Justinian Trudeau.
Triton

Triton was a moon of Neptune located in the Sol System. The moon was where the Combine's Polus Base was constructed. Triton was hit by the Gigamagnet at the end of the Great META War.

After being struck by the Gigamagnet at lightspeed, Triton lost approximately 41% of its mass to the massive magnet, and was launched off of it's orbit and away from Neptune's grasp. Triton would escape Sol's gravity and embark on a spiritual journey across the cosmos.
Lunar Sexbots

## The Lunar Sexbots

The Lunar Sexbots were a group of rogue sex dolls-turned killer robots which roamed the surfaces of Earth's Moon for over 100,000 years.

### Inception

The mad scientist (also Ohioan) Dr. Finshersnitch Ozband was responsible for the creation of the Lunar Sexbots. In his elderly years, as his mind was rotting and the Ohioan Radiation Storms wore away at his sanity, Dr. Ozband became obsessed with collecting Silicone Sex Dolls. He had a collection of over forty at one point. A few years before his death, he programmed his artificially intelligent supercomputer to 'gift his sentience to those he cared most about'.

When Dr. Ozband passed away, the computer deduced that the logical course of action was to implant Ozband's conscience into the sex dolls, as they were the only thing the doctor had ever seemed to truly love.

By 165 B.B., two years after his death, the Sexbots were a group of 27 artificially intelligent, practically invincible, sexually charged silicone beasts of destruction. They hijacked a Combine troop transport and crashed it into a mar in the far side of Earth's Moon, where they would dwell for the next 100,000 years.

### Terrorization of Martian Citizens

After the China-Mars Conflict, many Martians were forced to relocate. They were not welcome on Earth, due to their opposition of many of the planet's countries during the Great META War. However, Earth's Moon had relatively few settlements (or so they thought). When the Martians arrived on the Moon, they were immediately greeted by Lunar Sexbots asking them if they were virgins. If they said yes, the Sexbots would annihilate the Martian instantly. This led to most Martian children being slaughtered on the spot.
Massacre at Ottawa

The Massacre at Ottawa was a violent, genocidal event that occured in the Southern Ontario city on the first day of the Great META War, in 200 B.B. There were 58 casualities, including that of Canadian Prime Minister, Brad Kijamamloisoska. The incident occurred when a mysterious extraterrestrial object filled with a weaponized plague (later discovered to have been of Combine Origin) crashed into Ottawa, Canada. This was the conflict which drew Canada, the United States of America, Mexico, and Ohio into the soon-to-be global war.
Diana Eden

Karakteri canlandıran CrazyEray

Simon Riley

## Genel Bilgiler

Diana Eden 1996 yılında Amerika'nın Hood River kasabasında küçük şömineli bir evde, orta halli bir ailenin tek çocuğu olarak dünyaya gelmiştir. Annesi Abigail ev hanımı, Babası Edward kasaba şerifidir.6 Yaşına geldiğinde ilkokula başlamış ve iyi bir başarıyla bitirmiştir.10 - 12 yaşlarına gelince silahları merak etmiş ve silahlara ilgisi artmıştır. Arkadaşları ile sürekli hafta sonları Paintball'a giden Diana 16 Yaşına gelince polis olmaya karar vermiştir.Diana 17 yaşına gelince notları iyi olmasına rağmen bu şekilde istediği şeyi başaramayacağını düşünüp her gün sahilde koşmaya başlamıştır. 18 Yaşına gelince üniversite sınavına girmiş ve George Washington Üniversitesini kazandığı için çok mutlu olmuştur.Diana 19 Yaşına gelince üniversitenin çok zor olduğunu düşünüp derslerine öncelik vermiş sporu azaltmıştır artık haftalık spor ve hafta sonları Paintball yapıyordur. Diana 22 yaşında üniversiteyi bitirdikten kısa bir süre sonra annesi Abigail'in ölüm haberini alınca Hood River'a babası Edward'a destek olmak için geri dönmüştür. Abigail'in ölümünden çok üzülen Diana departmana başvurmamış ve kasabada kalmaya karar vermiştir. Her gün annesinin acısı ile birlikte ormanlarda koşu ve antrenman yapan Diana 2 yıl sonra 24 yaşına gelince bu şekilde yaşayamayacağını düşünüp babası Edward'a danışarak Amerika Los Santos'a gelmiştir. Bir süre insanlarla tanışmış ve şehir ortamına alıştıktan sonra Los Santos Polis Departmanı'na başvurmuştur.
Zurisma

Zurisma was a large palace that was the seat of the Zerri Government on Zerrion, where the planet's Queen, Asanka, oversaw the Zerri Planetary Bank. In 73,201 AB, Son of Mummy Hunter Biden became embroiled in a lobbying scandal at Zurisma which resulted in his indictment by the Waifurian Bureau of Investigations and subsequent brutal prison sentence of 3 days.
MAGA-Verse of Madness

The MAGA-Verse of Madness was an ethereal, trans-dimensional realm which existed outside of the confines of space and time. It was the home universe of the Great MAGA King's soul (here known simply as Magarra) before he was transferred by his creators, the Employers, into a 'human' form to rule America Aeterna on Old Earth.

## Nature of the MAGA-Verse

The MAGA-Verse in its entirety resembled a twisted, crumpled replica of New York City (circa 19 B.B.). The land frequently folded over itself, creating new sprawling highways and building conglomerations regularly. Magarra *was* all this that resided inside of the MAGA-Verse; it was all his creation, and was all a part of him.

## Inhabitants of the MAGA-Verse

The Inhabitants of the MAGA-Verse were all extensions of Magarra; however, they all lived completely independent lives. Most of them resembled humans in all manners except for one intriguing aspect- coal black eyes. They went about their lives, totally unaware that there existed an entire Omniverse outside of the MAGA-Verse of Madness.

## Eulogy to the Great MAGA King

When Joe Biden consumed Donald Trump in 1 AB, this deeply saddened Magarra, who had quite enjoyed being the MAGA King. A funeral was held (although none of the Maga-Versians understood who or what it was for) and a Grand firework show was put on display, in honor of the extra-ordinary achievements of the Great MAGA King.
Rannjoe

The Rannjoe was a soulless, chronically depressed ectoghast which inhabited the Temple of Rannjoe. The Rannjoe was named after this temple, which it haunted for many years. It would frequently creep up on the Warshippers and smell their shoulders, something which earned it the nickname the "Ghost of Joe Biden". Eerily enough, the Rannjoe also strongly resembled Joe Biden. Many G-Anon truthers believed that the Joe Biden was merely a puppet of the Rannjoe, a slave to the bidding of a higher master.
M.T.O.

The M.T.O, otherwise known as the Meta Termination Occult, was a group of highly-skilled international soldiers who defended Earth during the Great META War. Notable members of the M.T.O. included Rick Hernia, Keith Cumshoes, and William Taft. The M.T.O. used highly advanced HEV suits, developed by Tyren White and his science team at Black Mesa.
Pangean Artwork Musuem

The Pangean Artwork Museum, founded in 2 AB, was a vast collection dedicated to the display of many ancient artifacts of the Pangean and Aeternian Peoples. First housed in the basement of the Bass Pro Shop Pyramid, the museum was relocated to Waifuria Prime following the space station's creation, and later, the Restaurant at the End of the Omniverse.
Weapon of Mass Destruction

The Weapon of Mass Destruction was a hydrothermonic capsicum-powered nuclear bomb which was constructed by Saddam Hussein in the Iraqi desert. It was a 100-meter tall hot-pink phallic shaped device. it was constructed underneath the Tombs of Babylon.

Saddam Hussein intended to use this weapon on The United States of America and Ohio, in an effort to end the Great META War. Saddam viewed the United States as an aggressive, imperialist force, which was responsible for continuing the never-ceasing and increasingly costly intergalactic conflict. Unfortunately, U.S. President George W. Bush was made aware of the Weapon of Mass Destruction, and launched a preemptive strike against the Iraqi government. This strike killed Saddam Hussein and much of the Iraqi government, beginning a period in US politics known as the "War On Terror".
Scorched Cock Policy

The Scorched Cock Policy was a cruel and unjust policy implemented by Combine and later Waifurian military leaders in an attempt to rob prisoners of war of their masculinity. It consisted of the burning and preparing of the male genetalia in a manner similar to that of the popular American sausage food, Hot Dogs.
New York Ball of Human Flesh

The New York Ball of Human Flesh was a reanimated superconscious entity comprised of the flesh and organs of approximately 8 billion human beings. It appeared in Central park on July 22, 2 A.B., and disappeared on the same day. The Ball of Flesh reportedly emitted loud, high pitched shrieks and moans which broke the glass and even leveled several nearby buildings. As seen in the picture, the Ball of Human Flesh was approximately 20x taller than the average skyscraper. The Ball of Human Flesh's appearance also forced many major airlines to reroute their flights for that day.
Sauron Microcosm

The Sauron Microcosm was a miniature-scale entity which was nearly identical in chemical makeup to the guardian of Portland, the Eye of Sauron. The Sauron Microcosm was used by the governments of the world to see into the future. During the Great META War, the nations of Earth used the power of the Sauron Microcosm to foresee the Combine’s next moves.

Origins

The Sauron Microcosm appeared wrapped in a mysterious cloth on the doorstep of famed Canadian ice skater Brandon Hondale in 20 B.B. Brandon, perplexed by the object, delivered it to his local militia, which then delivered it to the Board of Waifuria. The Board’s scientists at Black Mesa began studying the Sauron Microcosm’s tremendous power.

Resonance Cascade

The Sauron Microcosm wasn’t in Black Mesa for long before it became a serious problem. Doctor Eli Vance, a leading researcher at Black Mesa, exposed the Sauron Microcosm to a small quantities of Xen crystals, as an experiment. The two objects were dangerously reactive to each other, and their interactions led to a resonance cascade which led directly to the Lambda Incident.

In the aftermath of the Lambda incident, The Orb (as it became known) was transported to a high-tech facility in Delaware where it was kept under strict lockdown and protection from United States Government entities, until 6 A.B., when the Sauron Microcosm’s containment unit was breached during the Yonise Escapade. It disappeared and was not seen by Humans again.

Headfishing

The Sauron Microcosm was used by the Great MAGA King (as well as many other prominent figures, including Bill Clinton and Geoffrey Eckstein) to engage in heinous, non-euclidian sexual acts with extradimensional beings. Usually, the instigator would place an appendage of their choice into the Microcosm’s pupil, and would hold it there until something ‘bit’. The practice became known in elite circles as “headfishing”.
West Valley Central School

West Valley Central School was a Pre-K through 12 Primary School located in western New York, in the United States. The School had a corrupt school board, which repeatedly tried to close the school to no avail.

The School was often subject to repeated harassment from horrible old men, hailing the neighboring Ellicottville Central School. These Rotten Old Men included such infamous figures as Tim Ploetz and Mark Ward.

In 0 AB, Mark Ward, often dubbed “Sleepy Mark” by staff and students, became Superintendent after the rotten small-penised school board (Led by Tim Ploetz) pushed the previous Superintendent out and, ignoring the will of the entire surrounding West Valley Community, brought the Anti-West Valley Mark Ward into the position.

During his time in office, Mark Ward fell asleep in staff meetings, including the first student meeting of the year, which was conducted over Zoom. Mark was an old rotten sot who resembled the Mummy in mental capacity.

In 1 AB, Mark was ousted from his position after Tim Ploetz lost power on the School Board due to several resignations. A New Superintendent was hired, who actually cared about the school and wanted to see it succeed.
The great META war

###### Not to be confused with the Second Great META War or the Third Great META War

The Great META War was a large scale interplanetary war that took place, sporadically, from 200 B.B. to 1 B.B. During this 200-year conflict, many sentients lost their lives.

The **Great META War** was named after the social media site META (beforehand, it had been known simply as 'the Horrible War'). This was because the residents of Earth took to streaming attacks and battles live over their smartphones, instead of running from the interdimensional warfare in front of them.

### Catalyst

When the Australian Government found out about China's secret research facility inside of Uluru in 201 B.B., they were understandably upset. They asked China politely to vacate the premises, to which China responded with several Nuclear Warheads. This led to a small conflict between Australia and China, which eventually drew every major global power into the fray. The Combine, seeing that Earth's nations were weakened, decided to try to invade the planet during this time of weakness. This was a rotten blunder at the hands of Combine Security Official G-4323, and thus began the two-hundred year **Great META War**.

### End

The war ended in a very stable and normal way, and it was all thanks to the Board of Waifuria and Donald Trump. No other party was involved in this. Do not read the article about Mr. Nefarious. Mister who? Exactly.
Old Willow Balls

`Old Willow Balls was a half-man, half-horse creature who roamed the forests of Wisconsin. Born in Fort Testicle, He was a wise old fart and revered by the animals of the forests as a protector of magicks and Pangean Secrets. However Old Willow Balls was executed by a Waifurian thermal detonator during the events of the Milwaukee Protocol.`
Portlandian Spacefracture

The Portlandian Spacefracture was a spacetime microcollapse which occurred in Seattle, Washington in 4 AB.

The Spacefracture occurred and was resolved in the same day, somehow being dealt with singlehandedly by the Mummy himself. The Mummy dispatched a Magarrish Chronobeast, which spawned in Seattle at 7:02 AM outside of a local Wawas. After enjoying an (unpaid) helping of carbonated beverages, the Magarrish Chronobeast began wreaking havoc on the Northwestern City. Mummy, having just returned from the completion of Waifuria Prime, immediately sprung into action, jumping from the satellite and plummeting down to Earth's surface, creating a massive impact crater south of Seattle and sending the Magarrish Chronobeast hurtling into the pacific ocean. An intense battle ensued, which Mummy somehow miraculously won. How he did this is unclear as all local media stations were eaten by the Chronobeast and Fox News reported the incident as an 'average day in a Democrat-run shithole city', ignoring the Chronobeast completely for the day. By the time night fell, Seattle was liberated, and the Mummy had acquired a nasty stomachache.

The body of the Chronobeast was never recovered.
Swamp of Broken Dreams

The Swamp of Broken Dreams was a mystical realm located somewhere neither here, nor there. It was a place which defied all logical constructs of space, time, and everything in between. The swamp was home to the forgotten and downtrodden; to the ghosts of the past which history had buried in the dark veil of nonexistence. The Residents of the Swamp of Broken Dreams were remembered by no one, yet forced to roam the barren wastes, reminiscing eternally about when they had been *known*.

## Inside the Swamp

The Swamp was populated with ancient relics from across the many civilizations of Earth. Sunken Mesoamerican pyramids sat stagnant in the bog, half submerged in mud, slowly seeping deeper into the dark depths of the Swamp. Beige, western office complex buildings occupied the rare clearings of the swamp. They were devoid of furniture or life; save for the lights. The lights were on. And they never turned off.

Computers and televisions dotted the swamp's surface, often sitting in clusters of seven or eight, with keyboards and mice floating gently nearby. The occasional swivel chair could be spotted among these; however, usually the Residents were quick to sweep them up, whisking them away to whatever dark hole they'd made their home.

## Entering the Swamp

The Swamp was not easy to find; indeed, those who found it had seldom sought it out. Often, those who entered the realm never realized they'd become lost, until it was far too late.

Those who traveled alone; those who had no close friends, no close family, were most susceptible to entering the Swamp. Those who entered would slowly begin to transform into Residents.

### Residence in the Swamp

Residents often began to physically decay within hours of entering the swamp. The mosses and algae of the still water would quickly begin to make their way up the legs of the Residents, eventually reaching the chest. At this point, the thick plants would wrap around the ribcage, slowly taking hold of the Resident's body. The mosses would drain the hearts, and the algae drained souls. The Resident would slowly forget all that they had loved; their passions, their fascinations, and most of all, their *memories*. By this point, the Resident was one with the Swamp, forever and eternally. They had been tethered spiritually to the realm of the forgotten. The Swamp remembered, but the Resident... well, all the Residents could do was forget.

Those stranded in the Swamp of Broken Dreams only remembered one thing, and that was that they had been *forgotten*.
Otto Von Bismuth

Otto Von Bismuth was the eternal king of the crystal world of Dutt Kroasis. Bismuth ruled with a gentle heart and worked tirelessly to ensure his people lived happy and prosperous lives.

### Chemical Structure

Otto Von Bismuth had a body comprised of 74% Bismuth. The blood of Dutt Kroasians was a mixture of molten Bismuth and Iron. Otto was the ruler of Dutt Kroasis because he had the highest concentration of Bismuth in his body than any other life form on the planet.

### Early Childhood

Otto Von Bismuth was born on the neighboring planet Nex Kroasis, to his father and thirty-seven mothers. The family moved to Dutt Kroasis when Otto was less than a month old. Otto was raised by all of his mothers for his formative years. He eventually ate fourteen of these mothers; one on each birthday of his childhood (as was Dutt Kroasian custom). He selected the mothers with the most Bismuth in their blood, and thus became the most Bismuth-rich being in the Kroasis system.

### Force Sensitivity

Because of his Bismuth-rich blood, Otto had a tremendous amount of power over his fellow Dutt Kroasians. Otto could influence their thoughts and quite literally control their minds. Bismuth was highly reactive It took him some time to realize this, but when he discovered this power, he contacted Rick Hernia for help controlling it. Rick Hernia taught Otto in the ways of the Force, and helped him to center himself and control these newfound powers.
Ohio Greenspill

The Ohio Greenspill was a Class-VB 74 Spatial Anomaly which occurred across all of southern Ohio. Residents reported finding pools of odorless green liquid in mysterious and bizarre places, such as inside of cabinets, under sewage grates, and in lightbulb filament. The Green liquid could not be fully expunged and reportedly increased in volume when removal was attempted. The Greenspill became a public health hazard when dairy farmers across the state began reporting that their cows’ udders were releasing strictly Greenspill fluid.

Ohioans eventually learned to live with the Greenspill fluid and began experimenting with it. They learned that the Greenspill functioned as an infinite power supply, allowing for light-speed technology to be developed on Earth. Waifuria Prime was powered entirely by a Greenspill fluid generator.

76 B.B.
The Cumsta$h

The Cum$tash (normalized as Cumstash) was a Species-Inclusive Sperm Bank, located on an asteroid in the Outer Rim of the Milky Way. It was known for housing the best semen in the Omniverse, with specimens from the greatest and most powerful beings of the Supercluster. Keith Cumshoes was a frequent visitor to the facility, due partially to his peculiar condition, in which he shot semen from his toes (hence the name).

## Administration

The entire staff of the facility consisted of one AI droid, a decaying Vortigaunt corpse, and a 108" screen 8K monitor attached to a 64 TB PC, accompanied by a sweaty, greased up armchair.
Nirn

Nirn was a large exoplanet that was created by Donald J. Trump in 240 B.B. after the Destruction of Old Earth. Nirn was conceived as a permanent prison for Alduin, the Destroyer of Worlds.

## Moons

Nirn had two moons, Masser and Secunda. These moons were thought to have been created out of the sundered corpse of Mike Pence (among other things).
Richard Livingston

Richard Livingston was an Englishman who worked at the residence of Geoffrey Eckstein as a groundskeeper. Mr. Livingston was happily married and had several wonderful children in Scotland. Richard became deceased after a boulder mysteriously "fell" from the second story window and crushed his body into a pulp.
Quincy Himbrox

Quincy Montgomery Himbrox was a junior officer in the Waifurian Empire, serving under Captain Gorrin E. Maldives during the Great META War 2.

Quincy was tall and lean, with blonde hair and bright blue eyes. In his youth, he was sold into slavery on Berrand. At the age of five, a modeling agency, J.F. Modeling, discovered him, and he was soon purchased and puppeted around in Beauty Pageants across the Waifurian Empire. Quincy hated this life, and secretly detested the laissez-faire policies of the Waifurian Empire which had led to him living such a hard and traumatic childhood. For a time, he was part of an anti-imperialist group; however, Quincy was conscripted into the Waifurian Invasion Force at age 19, and was forced to publicly renounce his beliefs.
London War Crime Emporium

The London War Crime Emporium was a large government building, operated initially as a historical site by the United Kingdom, and later as a proxy satellite military base of the Waifurian Empire. The London War Crime Emporium was home to animatronic versions of many former leaders of Earth, who came to life at night and feasted on those unlucky enough to be locked in the Emporium. The Emporium was owned and operated by Philadelphia resident Benjamin Afton.

## Quirky Animatronics

Bushie

Donnie

Tonie

Mummie

O
Polus Base

Located on the Ice moon Triton, Polus Base was a major foward command post in the service of the Combine. It was the Combine’s main base of operations during the Great META War and it was used primarily for planning and supplying troop movements. The base was frequently home to both General Grievous and Admiral Amonger during the war and was the site of Amonger’s discharge from the Combine Armed Forces. The base was destroyed in 1 B.B. as it was located on the part of Triton that was obliterated by the Gigamagnet.
Soviet Onion

The Soviet Onion was a massive empire stretching across northern Europe and Asia, ruling from 98 BB to 29 BB. The 'Soviet' part of the name equates roughly to "Council" in galactic English; the "Onion" in the name is a reference to the large, Onion-shaped Home from which the ruler of the Soviet Onion operated and lived.
Monsieur Pimplewhiff

Monsieur Pimplewhiff was the father of Modern Acne Medication. Born in London in 143 BB, he worked 20-hour days in an Ash Factory. This led to his pores being clogged, and his research with the dark magicks, which led to the creation of the first Acne Medication, called Ash Cream. It was comprised, ironically, of ash.