Season 1

The first season of Gays of Our Lives provides you with raunchy humor, offensive terms, and a hell of a goooood time. So glue your wigs down hard and wax your brows! Cause it's faggot time!

## Episode 1: Thug

**Synopsis:** The episode begins with LoJuan and David sitting on a couch and saying hello to each other with shady remarks. After LoJuan confesses her love, David seems unbothered and rudely reminds LoJuan that she will never find love since Neil is David's wife. In the next scene, Kaleb and London are in a cafe when Kaleb suggests that the pair go to burn some "fags right now." London says that Millie Bobbie Brown would quake in her boots and excitedly offers to get the gasoline. Kaleb goes to get matches. Meanwhile, Michael and Cedric exchange a meaningless conversation that reveals Cedric can say nothing other than the word "moo." The ending title screen explains that the pair "ended up going to a gay bar only to get shot up by a couple of gay thugs."

Episode 1 Link

## Episode 2: Gay

**Synopsis:** Michael, Kaleb, London, Cedric, are all stuck in Gay Land. Meanwhile, David and Neil sit on a couch and David asks how her wife's day had gone, in which Neil explains that she had killed a baby. David then asks for Neil to "come over here and destroy this pussy" but Neil breaks down crying after she reveals that she had broken their shared vibrator and apologizes. David agressively yells at Neil, calling her a "stupid bitch" and saying that she only married her was to get back at LoJuan. David slaps her wife and Neil apologizes again. At the same time, LoJuan meets Arcylique Injections who explains that she's basically just LoJuan but better and puts up a god-like front. After Arcylique claims that she started the injections, LoJuan argues that it was in fact Silicone. Arcylique slaps Lojuan which causes them to talk about LoJuan's mother dying in an "alligator crash." Arcylique invites LoJuan to join 'the Injections' and another one of her friends. LoJuan eagerly chooses Cedric to join the Injections. The episode ends with Arcylique revealing she was the one who imprisoned the four in Gay Land.

Episode 2 Link

## Episode 3: Death

**Synopsis:** London and Kaleb are in an elevator. Kaleb is disgusted by London's behavior in fingering the "Prime Minister" to try and bring "world peace." London says that she "just wanted a sniff" and tries to make Kaleb smell her fingers. Meanwhile, Cedric and LoJuan talk about being in the Injections family on LoJuan's couch. One of Cedric's "moo"s is interpreted as her cautioning LoJuan to be wary of Arcylique. LoJuan says that she will "keep an eye" on the mysterious leader of the Injections while the scene shifts to David and Michael's conversation in the cafe. Michael and David argue about David's drinking problem until Arcylique enters the cafe as well. Michael tells Arcylique to "fuck off" and David starts to complain about her relationship with Neil. After David talks about Neil mumbling in her sleep about a serial killer coming to town, Michael begins to worry about their lives. Suddenly, a murder is seen to take place in the cafe involving a mysterious green witch and an innocent bystander. Michael urges to tell the others about the serial killer and David flirts with the cashier.

Episode 3 Link

## Episode 4: Note

**Synopsis:** Michael is seated at her computer to send out a warning to her friends about the serial killer when she realizes none of them are worth saving. Michael sends out the letter nevertheless, which warns everyone that the serial killer could strike anyone at any time. In addition, Michael asks the six to team up in an effort to "stop the madness" once and for all. Lojuan and David are seated in the couch room again when Lojuan asks her if she recieved Michael's note. David says no, and the two decide to snort lines after deciding Michael is full of "shit." Lojuan claims her "nose is bleeding" two hours later and the two have a bonding experience when David licks cocaine off of LoJuan's nose. Meanwhile, London and Michael meet up alone since David and LoJuan are "coked out of their minds," Cedric is in a "coma," and Kaleb went to "host a fundraiser for the Euthanasia on Kids program." Michael gets frustrated and asks "God" to guide her through the situation when Arcylique shows up. Michael again tells Arcylique to leave them alone and kill herself, explaining that they need to find out the identity of the serial killer as soon as possible before someone else is murdered. At the same time, Santa Claus is stabbed and killed by the green witch and the serial killer's identity is revealed as Moist. She posses both London and Michael's souls which are now trapped in the "underworld" and David tells Neil she wants a divorce.

Episode 4 Link

## Episode 5: Crack

**Synopsis:**The episode begins with Neil standing alone in the bathroom, telling herself that she can love herself for who she is. David enters soon afterwards and reminds her that their divorce papers are "due tomorrow" and that she will "die alone." Neil breaks down crying and David continues to be ignorant. The next scene shifts to LoJuan and Kaleb sitting at a bus stop and Kaleb is surprised LoJuan hadn't died from an overdose. The two make small talk about the Euthanasia on Kids Program and where the bodies will be put. Later, Kaleb questions LoJuan about London's whereabouts and LoJuan tells her that London and Michael are stuck in the Underworld. Kaleb agressively asks LoJuan why she hadn't told her, and LoJuan explains herself with a series of random excuses. The two share a kiss. Meanwhile, Cedric and David meet in a bedroom where Cedric has just recently woken up from her coma. David asks Cedric if she has seen Neil since she had "faked her signing of the divorce papers" and had ran away. Cedric has not seen her, and asks David if she had done anything to make Neil run away. David flashes back to earlier in the episode when she had told Neil that she will "die alone" but is oblivious to her wrongdoings. The episode ends with a revalation that Arcylique and Moist the witch are in fact sisters. Arcylique vows to bring Moist down to save her friends, but Moist argues that they aren't really Arcylique's friends in the first place since they "belittle" her. London and Michael are briefly seen in a blank space, presumed to be the underworld and the episode ends.

Episode 5 Link

## Episode 6: Plan

Synopsis:The episode begins with Michael and London exchanging in conversation in the Underworld. Michael thinks she smells something when Acrylique shows up and asks if someone "said God?" Michael snaps and yells at Acrylique senslessly. Acrylique reasons with Michael and grabs her attention by talking about Shawn Mendes and Nick Jonas' leaked sex tape. Michael then listens to Acrylique who explains that her sister Moist must be brought down. However, to get out of the underworld, London and Michael must be saved by a sacrifice. Michael freaks out but Acrylique reminds her that she won't die this season since it isn't in the script. It is revealed that one of the living must be killed to save two of the dead from the Underworld (or Michael must film and produce nugget porn). Michael chooses a sacrifice over the latter. London and Michael begin to decide who to kill when the scene cuts. Meanwhile, Kaleb and Cedric sit at the coffee shop. Kaleb tries to talk to Cedric about saving London and Michael, and they decide to go to Dallas to find voodoo spells but a cow ends up having sex with Cedric and Kaleb is disgusted. When they come back home, Kaleb congratulates Cedric on her sex moves. In the elevator, LoJuan and Neil talk about Neil's divorce with David. LoJuan reveals that she is getting deported and Neil tells LoJuan to fuck herself. LoJuan then uses the force to tell Neil to fuck her but Neil reminds her that she broke her vibrator. Neil begins to cry and asks LoJuan to tell David that he's getting sued, but LoJuan thinks that David died when LoJuan's family accidentally got into an alligator-cow crash. Finally, Roxxxy Andrews and Alaska talk about their fucked-up lives at a bus stop mawma.

Episode 6 Link

## Episode 7: Decision

Synopsis: LoJuan says hello to David (who didn't die in an alligator cow crash) at the office. David and LoJuan chat about deportation  until David asks if LoJuan has seen Neil because she is trying to "sue her beluga ass for not signing the divorce papers." LoJuan reveals that Neil is suing David as well, which confuses David because she thinks that she hasn't done anything wrong. A flashback fails to remind David that she rudely told Neil to sign the divorce papers and that she will die alone. David yells at LoJuan and tells her to leave her alone. Meanwhile, Acrylique, London, and Michael fail to discuss who shall die for the two to return. London threatens to harm Michael which causes Acrylique to interject, reminding them that they only have so much time left. Michael reluctantly asks London who she thinks is the weakest in the group, but London reminds her that "they are all bottoms." The two eventually decide that David or Cedric are the weakest overall, and the least connected would be LoJuan because she only speaks to David. Michael and London then decide that between Cedric and David, the "cow" must be kept alive. Between LoJuan and David, the two cannot decide. Acrlyique suspenseful asks who will be subject to ankle twisting, an orgy of millions of old men, and a buffet of dog shit with poison, but the scene cuts before the two's final decision is made. In an apartment, Kaleb reveals that she has found a clue that can lead the group to the Underworld and save London and Michael. The clue states "Why did the chicken cross the road?" David, LoJuan and Cedric all stay silent and roll their eyes at the new information, but Kaleb reminds them that they need to think about the clue before they discard it.  The other three come up with various politically incorrect reasons, until Kaleb cracks the code ("so it can get to the other side"). To Kaleb, this means that there has to be a "specific chicken or road" that leads to the underworld. The group decides to split up and search Spooky Ooky Street and the demented chicken at Elroy's house, then meet back at the apartment to finish the ritual. Finally, Moist confronts a boy who tried to have sex with David at the coffee shop and stabs him to death. Michael realizes that there is a way to cheat the system, but the scene cuts before it can be revealed.

Episode 7 Link

## Episode 8: Chicken

Synopsis: Episode 8 begins with a new credits sequence after it's hiatus for almost four months. LoJuan and David arrive at Elroy's house to look for his demented chicken. Elroy reveals that everyday he injects the chicken with heroin and feeds it nipple hairs while it listens to Gucci Gang on repeat. While he goes to find the chicken, Cedric and Kaleb find a hidden ritual behind a pole on Spooky Ooky Street that explains the group must make the chicken cross the road which will cause a splash of rain to open the portal to the Underworld. Kaleb and Cedric wait there and make small talk. During this conversation, Cedric surprisingly says his second word ever which is "oink?" Back at Elroy's house, LoJuan and David wait for hours. David feels like going through this much effort isn't worth it to save London and Michael because David senses that he and LoJuan are in danger. LoJuan is suspicious of David's reasoning, but David reminds her that when Michael neeeded those two the most, they were too busy doing cocaine. LoJuan and David then decide to snort coke and when they wake back up, Elroy tells them that they have been coked out for around eight hours. He then gives them the chicken, wishing the two good luck and a "merry chrustmas." Finally, the grouop meets up again on Spooky Ooky Street. Kaleb yells at the two and asks them what took so long. When David explains, Kaleb's gay ass is not shocked. Kaleb explains to David that she must place the chicken down and let it cross the road to make the portal appear. On it's way across the road, the chicken gets stuck on a Snicker's wrapper and a truck runs it over. The blood spray gets to the other side, and the group of fags successfully open the Underworld portal. The group hurries over to the portal, with Kaleb worrying about her weave. Episode 8 ends with a PSA from LoJuan, reminding kids that violence is never the answer, but emotional blackmail is and that more episodes are on the way.

Episode 8 Link

## Episode 9: Battleblood

Synopsis:

Episode 9 Link

## Episode 10: Showdown

Synopsis:

Episode 10 Link

## Trivia

Episode 1 is the shortest episode.

Episode 5 was the first episode to feature ever main and recurring character

Episode 8 was the first episode to finally have an intro.

Episode 8 is the first episode where Cedric says something other than "moo."

Episode 9 is the longest episode so far at 9 minutes and 6 seconds.

Episode 9 is when the first death of main character happens. R.I.P. Neil.

Episode 10 is the second episode where Cedric says something other than "moo."

Episode 10 currently has the record for most deaths, two.