M.U.L.C.H.

**M.U.L.C.H.**, short for **Machine Used for Literally Converting Humans To Plants** (the last two letters are insisted to be silent), is Derek's key invention to his ultimate plan to transform all humans into Pistachions, as revealed in the final act of "The Phineas and Ferb Effect".

## History

In "The Phineas and Ferb Effect", Baljeet and Buford were spying on the contraption, concealed in a trapezoid-shaped building, while in their prison in Lard World, but they specified to Melissa and Zack that they have no idea what it does. When they escaped their prison and encountered Derek, the villainous Pistachion indirectly mentioned the M.U.L.C.H. as his "master plan", explaining he will reveal it at 4:30 PM, before he found the four kids have already fled.

Later, when they, alongside Milo, Phineas, Ferb, and Candace had been captured and brought back to Lard World, they were escorted to Derek, who revealed its full name and function on live television. He wanted to fire it at the gang, but the mechanism suffers some technical difficulties, since the wiring was used for Derek's livestream. Due to this, Derek was unable to make proper use of the M.U.L.C.H. before Doofenshmirtz, Dakota, Cavendish, Orton and several Dakota paradoxes of the Island of Lost Dakotas arrive to combat the Pistachions, while Isabella and the Fireside Girls free Phineas, Ferb, Milo and the rest.

The machine has been fixed during the ongoing battle, however, and Derek orders the first humans, Bradley and Irving, to be brought towards it. As the machine did its job and turned them into evil Pistachions, Derek ordered the next pair of humans, Buford and Amanda, to be brought forth. Derek continued to use the M.U.L.C.H. on his human prisoners before the device was destroyed by Phineas, Ferb, and Milo in the Murphy's Law Suit. Unfortunately, by the time that had happened, Derek had already turned many of Milo, Phineas and Ferb's friends as well as their families into Pistachions, who he then ordered to sic them, Dakota, Cavendish, Orton and Doofenshmirtz. However, Doofenshmirtz's future self, Professor Time, arrived on time to pick up Orton and destroy Derek in 1955, undoing all the Pistachions' mess and turning everyone (save for Bradley's arm) back to normal.

## Function

* **Conversion**: The machine is used to, as its name suggests, convert humans into Pistachions, which is also known as "mulching". It does this by firing a green laser beam to whatever its barrel is aimed at. The laser beam has a direct effect on any human target being hit; being immediately converted into a Pistachion. The reborn Pistachion may be confused while it is still covered in foliage, but they quickly conform to their newly mulched self as they shed their foliage off, identifying the humans as enemies, and seemingly not recalling any past memories as a human.

## Victims

A list of humans Derek had successfully turned into Pistachions, before they were turned back to human after the time stream healed itself.

* Bradley Nicholson
* Irving Du Bois
* Buford Van Stomm
* Amanda Lopez
* Baljeet Tjinder
* Chad Van Coff
* Sara Murphy
* Martin Murphy
* Brigette Murphy
* Candace Flynn
* Linda Flynn-Fletcher
* Lawrence Fletcher
* Isabella Garcia-Shapiro
* Holly
* Milly
* Melissa Chase
* Giant Floating Baby Head
* Zack Underwood
* Mort Schaeffer
* Joni

## Trivia

* The initial pitch of Joshua Pruett for "The Phineas and Ferb Effect" had Melissa to remain a Pistachion permanently due to this machine. It would've advanced her relationship with Zack in a sweet way, before the idea was altered to just her arm remaining to be from a Pistachion, which then ultimately shifted to Bradley's arm being replaced.

## References

1. ↑ 1.0 1.1 https://twitter.com/zombietardis/status/1081920328824049665
2. ↑ https://twitter.com/zombietardis/status/1082101215675273217