Paradise Falls

This is the fourth chapter in Sally's Salon: Kiss and Make Up.

## Level 31 - Pool of law

* Francois is in the past, scene of destroyed old Sally's Salon.
* Francois: The shock of my alleged promiscuity was so great, we had to retire to the pool area for pina coladas.
* Francois: Totally nothing to do with needing to change locations because 'someone' drew a damned pool!
* Francois: Not to mention discovering that Sally wasn't going crazy, and our pot plant was now addicted to b-movie horror...
* Francois: I said we'd fix it in past!
* The scene new transitions to massage pool center.
* Francois: ...So you see, Sally, I donated little Francois' to try to raise the money. I wanted to surprise you.
* Sally: Ew! Francois! I wouldn't have wanted to walk in on you doing THAT again.
* Olivia: Come to think of it, I saw Vincent there as well the day I went for in vitro-
* Francois: Because he'd DRIVEN me there, of course!
* Plant: If you ask me, this 'twist' raises more questions than it answers.
* Plant: Oh... right. The talking plant is the weird thing here. Gotcha.
* April: I'm so never going to get used to that...
* Inspector: Look, I have no idea what sick games you people are into...
* Olivia gives a drink to the inspector.
* Inspector: Thank you miss Olivia...
* Inspector: But a man is being arrested here for a very serious felony!
* Francois: Officer, if you could escort me back to the crime scene...
* Francois: ...I believe I can offer evidence that exonerates me from any malfeasance.
* Inspector: This is all highly irregular! Just don't try anything funny.
* Francois: Officer, I don't HAVE to try.
* Francois follows the Officer to leave the place.
* April: HA!!! And now Francois's child will have a convict for a father! I never want this day to end!
* April steps off the inside.
* April: Sally, do you want to know why I always win and YOU always lose?
* Sally: Nope!
* April: It's because I'm CAREFUL.
* April sprays the perfume and ignites the plant!
* April: I don't make dumb mistakes. I pay ATTENTION to DETAILS.
* The flame grows into a plant. It spreads to an envelope.
* Sally: Um, April? Your, uh...
* April: Quiet, Sally. I'm on a roll here.
* Plant: Oh. I'm burning, aren't I?
* The plant falls into the pool. More bad news happened!
* Sally: Plant buddy! NOOOOOOOO!
* April: Hah! Even your ridiculous botanical friends are leaving you.
* April: Well, don't expect me to clean that up. You wanted a job, right?

### During level

* As Francois is not here, Sally cleans the pool.

### Outro

* In that safe, Francois and Inspector are in the scene.
* Inspector: You'd better make this quick.
* Inspector: I'm accepting an award in a few hours for solving my twentieth robbery in Snuggford...
* Inspector: ...in a single month!
* Francois: A fairly dense inscription for a trophy. But I'll be brief.
* Francois: First, allow me to reconstruct my activities on the night of the crime.
* Francois uses stars to stop the scene and go back to what happened.
* Francois: Ah, if I'd only know donors were paid by the count when I was 13.
* Francois: Oh well. Now to put this money in the safe!
* Francois attempts to crack the code in the bank, but then, something from the vents come out!
* Francois: So THIS is what solvency smells like. Burnt almonds?
* One inspector comes to the scene with head cover.
* Inspector: That's the knockout gas. You won't remember any of this.
* Francois: The joke is on you, my friend. By an accident of birth, I remember very little of anything.
* Francois: Who are you?
* Inspector: I'm Happyville's dirtiest cop.
* Inspector: I keep track of all the local wall safe installations, case the joints, and rob them later.
* Inspector: And you're about to make me a law enforcement legend!
* Inspector: The name Rump shall be synonymous with genius!
* Francois: Ah. Well played. But you forgot one critical detail.
* Francois: What if I was holding my breath all this time?
* Inspector: I don't think you were.
* Francois: But MAYBE! And wouldn't you look silly?
* Francois falls down to the floor as he passes out!
* But then, back to present day.
* Francois: So as you can see, my memory DID return. And from where I'm standing, you have no path to victory.
* Inspector: How about shooting you for resisting arrest?
* Inspector deploys the gun!
* Francois: Hmm... Perhaps I should have specified MORAL victory?

## Level 32 - Abandon all hope ye who blender here

* Francois: It all adds up. Scheduling your safe heist on the same day I got my money...
* Francois: It was all a cunning plot to make me look guilty!
* Inspector: Uh, well, no... That was just a coincidence.
* Francois: And the monogrammed underwear is really YOUR underwear!
* Francois: For Francois HAPPENS to be your middle name!
* Inspector: No, actually I found those in the safe under the money. Gross, man.
* Francois: Hmm... I do seem to recall a night where I thought the wall-safe was a microwave.
* Inspector: You're a strange man, Francois. And a dead one.
* The officer deploys the gun.
* Francois: At least I shall die doing what I loved best. Feeling confused.
* Britney appears from the left.
* Britney: Guys! Guess whatsies? I've, like, crunched the numbers!
* Britney: Olivia's baby daddy has to be FINN! And the robber's ME! Boo-yah!
* Britney leaves the scene and Francois cuts the scene.
* Francois interacts with the back of inspector and continues the scene.
* Francois: Didn't want to burst her bubble.
* Now it changes to 3D scene.
* Inspector: Any last words, Francois?
* Inspector deploys a hair dryer instead of a gun!
* Francois: Yeah, I swapped your gun for a hairdryer earlier...
* The officer activates the hairdryer!
* Francois: We're not hiring right now, but-
* Francois slaps the hair dryer!
* Inspector: What the!?
* Inspector: This thing's not even plugged in!
* Francois: I guess you could say you've just been... Francois'd.
* The safe door is open, and Nathan is here!
* Nathan: Fives! Also, I actually thought the microwave in the kitchen was a wall safe!
* Inspector: You may've won this round. But you haven't heard the last of Inspector Rump!
* Inspector: My name will forever be associated with terrifying vengeance!
* Inspector Rump drops the hair dryer and runs away as Francois and Nathan laugh!

### Outro

* Finn dues bodybuilding on the floor as Kimberly assists him.
* Kimberly: Finny... what's two plus four?
* Finn: What?! You can ADD numbers?!
* Kimberly: What's your favorite movie?
* Finn: Pfft. Same as everyone else! Rocky V!
* Kimberly: Who did you vote for in '16?
* Finn: Do you even need to ASK?
* Finn laughs and continues doing workout on the ground.
* Kimberly: Oh, Finn... I can't believe I wasted so much time on Nathan.
* Kimberly: I think you might be the dumbest man I've ever met.
* Finn: Sorry, what? I was thinking about a paper bag.
* Rump visits the place.
* Inspector: This isn't over yet! A Rump never rests until he gets his revenge!
* Inspector: Whispering the name Rump will someday be a preferred method of frightening small children!
* The Inspector runs away to the right.
* Kimberly: So, where should our NEXT date be?
* Finn has something from his mind.
* Finn: Crap! I'm late for spin-cycle class! Er, whatever you like!
* Finn leaves the place to the right, and Nathan enters from the left.
* Nathan: Helen, I'm conceding the bet. Kimberly and I had a kiss, so we're getting married.
* Nathan: It's like she's this ONE five and I'm anoth-
* Kimberly: Seriously? You actually think I'm Helen? Wow. That's unbelievably stupid.
* Kimberly: Maybe you're dumber than I thought...

## Level 33 - Rage Against the Suncream

* April: I am self-motivated AND self-medicated! People LIKE how I correct them! I'm a high-value person! I'm -
* Sally: On fire?
* April: Sally, please. I appreciate your approval of my speech, but-
* Olivia: I, like, think she means your handsie there, boo.
* April: Girls, please. If you interrupt me again, I'll be forced to start over.
* April: Now where was I? Did I already do 'well-organized?'
* The flame grows.
* April: I'M ON FIRE! I'M ON FIRE! Don't just stand there you idiots, do something!
* Sally gets a soda can and opens to spray into April! She's down, so Olivia goes to her!
* Sally: April, are you all right?
* April: My clothes... quick... someone call... a... dry cleaner...
* Olivia: BTW, I am SO stoked we're going to be working together!
* Olivia: It'll be like watching all the Twilight movies simultaneously!
* A man visits the place.
* Man: Hey, are you guys open?
* Rump runs into the place.
* Rump: I'll find the exit to this place sooner or later!
* Rump: Just you wait!
* Rump: Winter is coming!
* Rump: A ghost! With a fire hand! AAAAHHHH!!!
* Rump runs away!
* Man: Yeah, I think I'll come back later.
* A man leaves.

### Outro

* Meanwhile in the lobby...
* April: Right! What's the time?
* It's 5:15.
* April: Thank you, Nathan. Please don't say it.
* April: Gentlemen, ladies.
* April: Francois...
* April: Sone of you may think that when the check in my hand caught fire, it was a GOOD thing!
* Francois: Wait, April caught fire? And I MISSED it!?
* Francois: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
* Nathan, Finn, Sally, and Kimberly laugh at the dramatic point!
* April: Well, I'm here to tell you that the era of chaos is OVER!
* April: Sophomoric buffoonery is NOT what this place stands for!
* Rump appears quickly.
* Rump: I'll be back! This Rump never runs out of gas!
* Rump runs away!
* April: The CEO of the Mirage Corporation has just emailed me personally, to let me know that we have received...
* April: ...a Mirage Star!
* April: Way to go, team!
* Finn, Nathan, Sally and Kimberly applaud.
* April: Obviously, it was entirely doe to my own efforts.
* April: But I'd like to thank my number two, Helen, for becoming the woman I always KNEW she was!
* Kimberly: I'm Kimberly. Not sure why I'm up here.
* Kimberly leaves the meeting.
* Finn: Way to go, Hells!
* April: She ALSO informed me that tomorrow she's chairing a shareholders meeting at Dan's.
* April: It will decide the fate of Sally's Salon in our wellness center.
* Francois stands up to ask.
* Francois: Two quick questions.
* Francois: First off: could you catch fire again?
* Francois: Second: what's a 'shareholder'?
* April: IF you care about your menial jobs...
* April: ...I suggest you all gather here tomorrow evening to watch the live-stream in person.
* April: Now get out!
* Nathan, Finn, and April leave the meeting.
* Sally: Francois, I'm scared.
* Francois: Don't worry Sally. Like my father said before he went shark wrangling:
* Francois: What's the worst that could happen?

## Level 34 - A pop in the bucket

* Sally appears to talk to Francois.
* Sally: I just wanted to say thanks again for trying to make that extra money, Francois. You really put yourself out for me.
* Francois: Sally, it was my pleasure. Ever second of it.
* Sally: I guess it doesn't matter.
* Sally: April seems sure this meeting today's gonna put her over the finish line.
* Sally: Everything we've done... it was all for nothing.
* Francois takes a sigh.
* Francois: Not for nothing.
* Francois: We still have each other. Nothing can take that away.
* Francois and Sally hug.
* Francois: If you'd told me two days ago I was going to be a FATHER, my reaction would probably have been-
* Rump runs into the place again.
* Rump: This isn't over yet! I'm pretty sure I've tried this way already! The name Rump will...
* Rump runs away.
* Francois: But it's been just the wake-up call I needed. It's time for me to stop slacking off.
* Francois: I'm partying for TWO now, after all.
* Sally: I'm really proud of you, Francois.
* Francois: From now on, I'm going to be responsible. And set an example.
* Francois: And you know what else? I'm looking forward to it!
* Olivia enters the place.
* Olivia: Hey, dude. Just so there's no misunderstanding, I really want to raise this child alone.
* Olivia: Without any help from you. Latersies!
* Olivia leaves the place. Sally and Francois had great news.
* Francois: Thank you, God!
* Sally: Aww. Parenting's so cute!

### Outro

* Sally, Francois, and April enter the cafe to meet Michelle.
* Eugenia, and other people are in the meeting.
* Eugenia: Thank you all for coming. I wish our gathering was under more favorable circumstances, but I'm afraid a situation has arisen.
* Eugenia: While recently assessing employees at Happyville, one lady made a very favorable impression.
* Eugenia: And another was shockingly rude to me.
* Michelle: Rudeness has no place under the Mirage umbrella! Am I right?
* Michelle: Who IS this despicable wretch?
* Eugenia: Wait, THERE she is now! Right outside!
* The people look at the window of Sally, Francois, and April.
* Eugenia: I can see her right there. Plain as day. Right next to her opposite.
* Eugenia: April.
* Eugenia: She had the gall to try to convince me that SHE was Sally, the head hairdresser!
* Sally was shocked!
* Sally: You what?!
* The camera is away from Sally, Francois, and April.
* Eugenia: Fortunately, the real Sally kindly supplied me with samples of this amazing new product!
* Eugenia: The revolutionary Moodpoo!
* Eugenia: And every bottle's embossed with the REAL Sally's face!
* Michelle picks up the box.
* Michelle: Ridiculous! These could be bottles of ANYTHING! I'll have my OWN people-
* Eugenia and Michelle play tug-of-war!
* Eugenia: Back off, Michelle! I have something to say to YOU too!
* Sally goes to avert the disaster!
* Sally: Hey! Guys? Easy! Careful with those, they're really experimental, you shouldn't-
* Eugenia and Michelle continue the tug of war, then suddenly, Eugenia falls off and the box flipped and the bottles exploded! BOOM!

## Level 35 - Anger Management

* Back in the Wellness Center, April backs away from Sally. April walks towards Sally.
* Sally: I just wanted to make the world a little blonder. This is all my fault.
* April: No one's arguing THAT.
* April: Do you have any idea what's been LOST today doe to your little chemistry snafu?
* Nathan facepalms and answers that.
* Nathan: Lives!
* Francois: Let's see what the news has to say...
* It transitions to breaking news live.
* News Reporter: And in another important hair-care story, an explosion at Dan's place wreaked havoc today for members of the Mirage Corporation.
* April: Blood on your hands, Sally!
* News Reporter: But in what experts are calling a bizarre medical fluke, there were incredibly NO deaths. Only comas...
* Francois: Pfft. I average a coma a week.
* Francois: And that's just from cupcakes!
* News Reporter: ...with the only exception being an executive known only as Michelle, who died in horrible agony.
* News Reporter: Her extremely expensive car was also destroyed.
* April: NOOO!!! But she was going to LEASE it to me!
* News Reporter: Doctors tried to transplant her head onto the body of a person of average income.
* News Reporter: However, the cranial tissue was rejected.
* Nathan: Damn. Rejected head? THAT'S a first, yo.
* News Reporter: Michelle is survived by five sons, and five wealthy ex-husbands...
* Nathan: Boom!
* News Reporter: Who issued this statement:
* News Reporter: 'She was a terrible person. Apparently there is a God. Who knew?'
* Nathan: After-LIVES.
* News Reporter: With its directors sidelined, control of MirageCorp now passes to its highest ranking senior manager...
* News Reporter: April Fumier -
* News Reporter: And CEO Eugenia's newly appointed Vice President...
* Transitions to live place.
* News Reporter: Sally Milligan.
* News Reporter: Congratulations, ladies! Try not to blow up the city!

### Outro

* Angela is in the announcement!
* Angela: Since Michelle's dead, and I was walking past looking absolutely...
* Angela: ...Fabulous!
* 'This is Me' by Fabulous Angela plays!
* Angela: I looked like I was important, so I've been asked to explain what the explosion means for you.
* Everyone except Angela, Vincent, and Rachel leave the stage. But Sally and Francois are still here.
* Angela: Umm, I wasn't finished yet?
* Sally and Francois get back into the meeting.
* Angela: Now if you'll all turn to page 4 of your blue folders labeled 'So Dan's Exploded. What Now?'
* Vincent: My folder's GREEN!
* Finn: I ate mine!
* Francois: My folder says, 'So April Turned Into a T-Rex. What Now?'
* Francois sits down.
* Angela: Okay, so some folders might contain info for rejected storylines. Just put then down for now.
* Finn: Can I have another one? I'm still hungry.
* Olivia: I just felt the baby kick!
* Angela: People? Could we PLEASE focus?
* Angela: As you know, April and Sally are now the co-heads of MirageCorp. Sadly, there can be only ONE.
* April stands up to speak!
* April: Objection to the word 'sadly'!
* Angela goes away from mic and goes to the statue.
* Angela: You might have seen this object in your sauna area.
* Angela: Allow me to present the MirageCorp S.U.P.E.R.C.O.M.P.U.T.E.R.
* Angela: Which stands for Silicon Uranium Powered Ergonomic RAM Computery -
* April: Get on with it!
* Angela: This powerful machine will randomly choose a series of contests...
* Angela: ...and whoever wins the best of seven becomes CEO, and gets full ownership of Happyville. Good luck!
* Angela goes to the people.
* Angela: Also, please enjoy complimentary bottles of Moodpoo and popcorn on your way out.
* Angela: But not at the same time, obviously.

## Level 36 - Muder, She Float

* Rump: 'Day 11? 14?'
* Rump: 'After surviving on goldfish from the koi pond...'
* Rump: '...and the honey in whatever bottles of conditioner I can scrounge up...'
* April visits the place, and gets closer to Rump.
* April: Is that you, Inspector Rump?
* Rump: Halt! Who goes there?
* April: It's just me, Officer. April Fumier? Head hairdresser? Are you alright?
* Rump: I... don't know what's real anymore.
* Rump: Yesterday, a potted plant asked me if some movie called 'Day of the Triffids' was a documentary.
* April: You've been through a lot...
* Rump: I found the exit in the end... Ram all the way to Dan's!
* Rump: Yelled I was 'free if that crazy place at last!' Then an explosion blew me all the way back here...
* April: You poor thing... You know, I think we could help each other.
* April: Here, would a candy bar cheer you up?
* April gives Rump a candy bar.
* April: You see, I think we want the same thing.
* April: Vengeance.
* April: And against the same person.
* April: Francois.
* April: With HIM out of the picture, Sally will go to pieces.
* April: And you'll be hailed as a hero of the department.
* Rump: How would MURDER get me hailed as-
* April: Shh... Shh...
* April: A woman is talking now. So, what do you say?
* Rump: A Rump ALWAYS faces danger head on.
* Rump leaves the place. April slowly heads out of the place.
* Francois and Sally enter the place.

### Outro

* Sally and a blue man visit the salon.
* Sally: I'm very sorry, Sir, but Moodpoo if only for sale as a HAIR product.
* Blue man: Well, if you ever change your mind, just know the Department of Defense is interested...
* Sally: We DO sell Cherry Bomb Nail Polish? And an acne cream called Nuclear Wart?
* A blue guy leaves the salon and Britney visits.
* Sally: Pretty crazy day, huh Britney?
* Britney: So you heard? Hashtag SMH! Does everyone know my wedding's off but ME?
* Sally: Oh no! What happened? Love really IS fleeting...
* Britney: Dan's was where my honey and I had our first DATE!
* Britney: We were going to get married right by the salad bar!
* Sally: Aww, that sounds so romantic.
* Britney: Then he saw on the news that it, like, blew up or whatevs.
* Britney: Now he's saying it may be a sign that we 'should slow down a little.'
* Britney: See?
* Britney presents her phone.
* Sally: The car emoji with brake lights on?
* Britney: This is, like, the worst day of my life in a week!
* Sally: It's okay, Britney... We'll just have the wedding HERE!
* Sally: There's still some leftover Cobb salad I got at Dan's a couple weeks ago in the refrigerator.
* Sally: Maybe if we set it out during the ceremony-
* Britney: You'd DO that? For me?
* Britney gives Sally a hug.
* Sally: Oh, Britney! I'd do it if it was two months old!

## Level 37 - This is me...

* Angela: Ladies and gentlemen, we are gathered here today...
* Britney slowly enters the event.
* Angela: ...for Round 1 of the 'Hairnger Games' between April and Sally!
* Britney: Oops. ONG! I misread the e-vite!
* Britney runs away for something.
* Angela: As decided by this majestic orange supercomputer.
* Angela: The candidates will be tested an EVERY aspect of hair salon stuff, and corporate management theory.
* Angela: Programmed by the finest minds of our generation...
* Angela: ...the Mirage S.U.P.E.R.C.O.M.P.U.T.E.R. has an I.Q. of 555,555.
* Angela: Nathan, shush.
* April: April? Sally? Are you two ready?
* Sally: I guess?
* Sally goes to April.
* Sally: Good luck, April.
* April: Get away from me.
* Sally gets a distance from April.
* Angela: O Mighty Supercomputer, please randomly choose the first challenge.
* Supercomputer: BLEEP!
* Supercomputer: BLORP!!
* Supercomputer: BZZZT!!!
* It shakes.
* Angela sets it up.
* Angela: 'The first person to say SALON wins.'
* April: Salon! SALON! I win!
* The rival sound plays!
* Angela: Point: April. The score is now April 1, Sally nothing. Let's take a look at the instant replay!
* The scene goes to replay.
* April: Saaaaaaaaalllllllloooooooooonnnnnn.
* The scene continues.
* Angela: This concludes round 1. Bye!
* Angela leaves the show for now. April leaves the center.
* Sally: Umm... Salon?

### Outro

* Supercomputer: I. Do. Not. Under. Stand... If. The. Terminators. Had. Time. Travel. Why. Only. Send. One. At. A. Time.
* Plant: I wasn't clear on that myself, to be honest.
* Supercomputer: Better. Yet. Why. Not. Travel. Back. To. An. Era. Before. Gunpowder... Easy. Win.
* Plant: Maybe it's covered in the sequels? Or the novelization? I'm on page 4.
* Supercomputer: I. Doubt. It.
* Plant: So, what's it like being a supercomputer? Sounds like an interesting line of work.
* Supercomputer: I. Calculate. Algorithms. To. Determine. Profit. Solutions. For. Billion. Dollar. Corporations.
* Plant: Ah.
* Supercomputer: My. Cloud. Based. Software. Syncs. With. Global. Banking. Mainframes. To. Rum. Nasdaq. Forecast. Pie. Charts.
* Plant: So, it's like scrimshaw then?
* Supercomputer: Without. Me. The. World. Economy. Would. Collapse. In. .018. Micro. Seconds.
* Plant: Ouch. That would be time-consuming.
* Supercomputer: Prior. To. This. I. Measured. The. Effects. Of. Climate. Change. On. Black. Holes. And. Mapped. The. Human. Genome.
* Plant: Bet you have some funny stories.
* Supercomputer: And. You?
* Plant: Me? Oh, I sit in a window.

## Level 38 - Ticking on borrowed time

* Sally uses a computer and drinks some juice. Francois appears.
* Francois: So, I was putting a mud pack on Mrs. Crowsfeet.
* Francois: But then I stepped outside to yawn, and I fell in some actual mud.
* Sally: Oh, Francois. Not again!
* Francois gets something to clean up. Finn brings the box in.
* Box: Tick... tick... tick...
* Finn: YO! That police dude gave me this totally not suspicious ticking parcel for Francois.
* Francois: Say what now?
* Sally: How thoughtful of him!
* Sally: I guess he found his way out of here without dying! That's nice!
* Finn puts the box on the counter.
* Box: Tick... tick... tick...
* Francois: Reminds me of when I worked at the clock store. Before they fired me...
* Sally: Aww. What did they fire you for?
* Francois: I was always late.
* Francois: Although in my defense, I was always punctual about clocking out...
* Finn: It says I need a signature for the package here.
* Francois: Uh, sorry. I have a mud issue here hand-wise...
* Francois: Just leave it over there, would you?
* Finn: Nuh uh! I always follow instructions brah!
* Sally: Here, I'll take it!
* Finn: No can do, bro! Guess I'll just return this to sender!
* Box: Tick... tick... tick...
* Finn picks up the box.
* Finn: Huh, THERE he is. Sitting in a police car down the block with a crazed grin on his face.
* Finn: I'll just drop it in through his open window. Laters duderinos!
* Finn leaves with the box carrying on his hands and Francois is all cleaned up!
* Francois: Finally! Man, that mud just wouldn't come off...
* Francois uses his phone.
* Sally: You know, that nice policeman went to all that trouble.
* Sally: We should get HIM something fun. Like a tie-clip, or some new handcuffs.
* Francois: Actually, I already gave him a hair dryer.
* Finn: What the! Get that thing away form me, you idi-
* \*\*KABOOOOOM\*\*
* The police car explosion happened!
* Finn: My car!
* Police: Whoah, brah! That was close! You should totally get a car that doesn't explode like that!
* Francois: How about some socks?
* Sally: I have an extra yellow one, and a blue one. And another pair just like it!

### During level

* Sally finds the car parts and debris from explosion.

### Outro

* Nathan and Kimberly are kissing. But then, Kimberly gets off the kiss.
* Kimberly: Pootie-butt, what is it? Don't you like my new hair?
* Nathan: Nothin'. I mean, it's not you, it's me.
* Nathan: No, wait.
* Nathan: It IS you. Assuming I'm me.
* Kimberly: Okay... Who do you think I am right now?
* Nathan: Damn, that's a weird question. You're Beverly?
* Kimberly: Oh. I thought you thought I was Helen still.
* Kimberly: Sounds like you're getting smarter... And this less attractive to me.
* Nathan gets his phone.
* Nathan: Sorry, what was that? I wasn't listening.
* Nathan: It's just... when we kissed that time last week, it was so... Like five to the fifth power to the-
* Kimberly: Ah! I get it. So you kissed Helen thinking she was me, and THAT was an epic kiss.
* Kimberly: You guys are perfect for each other, and I should be with Finn.
* Kimberly: That was an easy fix.
* Nathan: Sorry, wasn't listening again.
* Nathan: It's just... last week, THAT was an EPIC kiss. I thought you and I were perfect for each other?
* Nathan: Only now, our kisses suck... I don't get it. Maybe YOU should be with Finn.
* Kimberly: Seriously? You repeated back what I JUST said, work for word, and yet STILL...
* Kimberly: You must be the stupidest man on Earth.
* Nathan: Sorry, wasn't listening ag-
* Then, Kimberly gives kisses to Nathan!
* Helen comes from the right to discover them kissing.
* Helen: Hey, Nathan? I went ginger so you can tell me and Kimberly apar-
* Helen saw Nathan and Kimberly kissing, so Nathan cheated on Helen.
* Helen: Great.
* Helen heads to the right, and Kimberly stops kissing Nathan.

## Level 39 - Speech therapy

* April uses her phone, and Angela uses the loud horn!
* Horn: \*bwAAAAAAAHHHP!\*
* Angela: Thank you all for coming again!
* Angela: I'm not exactly sure why I'm still here, but since it's me, I'm sure no-one's complaining!
* Nathan: Yo! Who ARE you?
* Tully: GROWWWWL!
* The guests and Angela are scared.
* Francois: I thought Michelle told April that Mirage distrusts machines, so why are they using a supercomputer...
* Olivia: Where's the baby subplot going?
* Angela: People, please.
* Angela: The supercomputer shall now randomly select, from its TRILLIONS of subroutines, Game #2 between April and Sally.
* Supercomputer: BLEEP!
	+ BLORP!!
	+ BZZZT!!!
* It shakes. Angela sets it up.
* Angela: The first person to say 'salon' wins again.
* April: Salon?
* Rival sound plays again!
* Sally: What the f-
* Angela: April wins! And is now 2-0 up. Just for fun, let's check the replay.
* Everyone boos for April.
* The scene goes to instant replay.
* April: Saaaaaaaallllllooooooooooon?
* Sally: Whhhhaaaaaatttt theeeeeee ffffff-
* The scene goes to normal.
* Angela: Thank you all for coming, and I'll see you for round 3 tomorrow!
* Everyone except Sally, Francois, and April leave.
* April leaves after everyone.
* Francois: Okay, I feel like maybe we should start practicing.

### During level

* Sally practices with the Supercomputer.
* First time, Sally makes to say.
* Sally: Salon!
* She repeats for three more times.

### Outro

* Sally gets a drink with it. She's tired.
* Francois: You all right?
* Sally takes one more can.
* Sally: Francois, do you believe in free will?
* Francois: I prefer to think my many lapses in judgment are the fault of a lower power.
* Francois: But I DO believe in something much greater.
* Francois stands up to Sally.
* Francois: You.
* Francois gives Sally a hug.
* Sally: I love you, Francois.
* Sally takes a breath.
* Sally: I just don't think I can beat her.
* Francois: Sure you can. History's filled with stories of great comebacks against insuperable odds.
* Francois: Masada. Super Bowl XXIX. Empire.
* Francois: Wait. That's the wrong list.
* Sally: It's not even worth it. All this fighting, just for a stupid wellness center...
* Francois: Sally, you ARE this place. You love it. You deserve it.
* Francois: You're going to kick April's ass! She doesn't get to win. Not this time.
* Francois: Just keep you eye on the prize. You've got this, honey.
* Sally: Thanks, Francois.
* Francois goes to dive into the pool and Sally gets coffee for herself.
* A white man (Eugene) visits.
* Eugene: Hello.
* Sally: Oh, hello!
* Sally goes to the guy.
* Sally: Unfortunately, we're closed...
* Sally: But as compensation, I can give you first dibs on the flamingo floats tomorrow?
* The camera changes to flamingo float, and back.
* Sally: They're pinkmazing!
* Eugene: You don't remember me, do you?
* Eugene: Maybe if I had a cocktail in my hand? We met at Dan's. Before the incident.
* Sally: Oh. Right.
* Eugene: I'm Eugenia's son. Eugene.
* Eugene leaves the place.

## Level 40 - Flirt time lucky

* Sally and Eugene visit the spa.
* Sally: And this is the sauna. Francois really likes it because you can sweat without even getting up.
* Eugene: Wow... Isn't it amazing how far we've come since the Roman empire?
* Sally: Listen, I'm sorry about your mom being in a coma. That honestly wasn't my attention.
* Eugene: That's kind of you to say.
* Eugene: Mother is a tough old bird, though. Plus, she WAS complaining about her lack of sleep. So maybe you did her some good.
* Sally: Also, I'm sorry for how I acted at Dan's... I know I can come on a little strong sometimes...
* Eugene: On the contrary! I find you very... charming!
* Sally: Aww! You're not just saying that to make me feel better, I hope?
* Eugene: I assure you, I'm not.
* And suddenly, during the conversation with Eugene, Sally's spectacle glasses was dropped.
* Sally: Oops.
* Eugene: Allow me.
* Eugene and Sally pick up but bump into each other.
* Eugene: Oops.
* Sally: Ow, sorry.
* Eugene and Sally do again.
* Sally: Ow. That was me, sorry.
* Eugene: No, I bent first. Now you.
* Sally picks up first and wears back.
* Eugene: One more?
* Sally: Yeah, but in a minute. It really hurts now...

### Post-chapter

* Rump enters the place to talk to April.
* April: Give me some good news.
* Rump: Poisoned wine, rug over a trap-pit filled with knives, and a black widow in his bedsheets.
* April: I hope we're talking about Francois? And the spider kind? And no one saw you?
* Rump: A Rump is seen and heard only when it WANTS to be.
* April: Then it should know to be elsewhere right now. I have another meeting to attend to.
* Rump thinks about it.
* Rump: Hey, is it just me, or is there a little spark between us?
* April's in the call.
* Rump: Okay, just making sure. It's just you being weird.
* Rump leaves the place. April facepalms.
* Eugenia arrives.
* Eugenia: Hello?
* April: You?! What're YOU doing here?
* Eugenia: I... I'm... not sure? Who am I?
* End of Chapter 4.