100 Stat Man

An artist's depiction of the first 100 Stat Man.

> "In the beginning, there was 100 Stat-Man. And he sacrificed all that came before him. And he said it was good..."
>
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100 Stat Man was one of the most powerful beings in existence, emperor of The Germanic Empire and the first being to hold the title of 100 Stat Man, succeeded by Thorvald Stauning and then King Mega Chad The Dane of Romagna.

## **History**

It is unknown how the first 100 Stat Man became an Immortal god since he wasn't materialized in the beginning of the universe like Todd Howard and Reanu Keeves and he couldn't have used the dark power of the Cheesy Exploits like Seymore Clevarge and Elon Husk, because he wasn't born in the Tod-verse, so it is believed his power comes from exploits in his own plane of existence.

As a child, 100 Stat Man would wander the desolate north using his immortal powers to slay Christian missionaries, at the age of three he was famed across Scandinavia for slaughtering hundreds of Christians, but at the age of twenty, 100's mental health began deteriorating after killing one too many innocent people, giving him an inhuman thirst for blood and a desire to conquer the Earth.

By the age of 20, 100 Stat Man had rallied all of Scandinavia, Germany and Britain, which he named "100 Land One", "100 Land Two" and "100 Land Three", respectively. By the age of 22, 100 had conquered all of Europe in The First Great 100 War, while using his endless hordes of pagans from the "100 Lands" to spread Germanic paganism throughout his new empire, which he would name "The Great Germanic Empire of 100 Stat Man".

### Becoming an Immortal

Shortly after establishing The Germanic Empire 100 Stat Man would die from what was believed to be cholera, but according to The Spiffing Brit and 100 himself, he was actually struck down by Thor's lightning bolt and sent to Valhalla where he challenged Odin to a battle to the death.

After defeating Odin, 100 returned to Earth to rule over The Germanic Empire once again. Many believe that this experience was actually a hallucination induced by the mushrooms that 100 was fed on his death bed, somehow allowing 100's incredibly powerful and genius brain to tap into ancient Cheesy Exploits inside the mysterious mushrooms, which allowed him to resurrect himself as an Immortal, although this theory has since been debunked through the fact of his extremely long lifespan, and his abuse of his own planes exploits.

### **The Germanic Empire**

Before the first 100 Stat Man's second death and the fall of the Germanic Empire, he made two attempts to expand his empire beyond earth.

####  Invasion of the Tod-verse

Next 100 attempted to invade the Tod-verse by using his raw physical strength to rip a hole in reality and pass into the Tod-verse. Upon entering the land of Skyrim, he was met by a strange man with long flowing dark hair and the most beautiful face 100 had ever seen, it was Reanu Keeves. Their battle was as long as Reanu's flowing hair (roughly 82.9 years long) and ended with Reanu standing triumphant over 100's broken body, before sprinting across the Tod-verse and into 100's big reality hole.

#### Invasion of Rim World

First 100 attempted to expand into space by building a huge rocket shaped like his fist named the Fister and blasting it into space crewed by him, his son Big Dave, his loyal friend Sir Digby of Smeg and a horde of pagan super-soldiers.

In space 100 searched for a fun looking planet to colonize and after 3.7 days he found the perfect planet, it was like Earth but more fun. 100 approached the planet at full speed, but unfortunately he couldn't stop the rocket in time and it smashed through the planet destroying it instantly and instead landing on the planet directly behind it, this was the terrible planet of Rim World.

They landed in the region of Rim World known as Wales where they took part in the local trade and quickly gained a monopoly on the organ business in Wales, so in order to gain more power a caravan would be sent to the next region along, full of organs for trading, and would be transported by 100 and Sir Digby, but for unknown reasons the caravan disappeared along with its crew.

Many years later Mega Chad, the third 100 Stat Man, appeared in Wales, which was now under the control of a rebellion of Welsh farmers who rose up after the pagans stole one too many of their organs. Unfortunately Big Dave had been emperor since 100's disappearance, and the farmers had Big Dave executed along with his pagan super-soldiers. Mega Chad quickly put an end to the uprising and ruled over Rim World with an iron fist.

#### **Fall of the Germanic Empire**

Reanu became the new 100 stat man and the new emperor after arriving on Earth, but after a few years Reanu abandoned the empire before escaping back to Skyrim and closing the hole. Unfortunately Reanu had done a lot of damage to the great empire, so much in fact that the empire was split into hundreds of contesting nations which were all at war by the time he had left, beginning The Second Great 100 War.

Thorvald Stauning was the leader of the remnant nation known as Denmark during the war and a descendant of the majestic 100 Stat Man. At the age of 83.5 Thorvald was hit by a 100 stat meteorite that somehow giving the soul of 100 Stat Man complete dominion over his body, causing Thorvald to become the second 100 Stat Man.

As 100 Stat Man, Thorvald led Denmark to victory over the other remnant nations of the empire, establishing a new empire known as The Great Danish Empire and ending the second dark age of Europe.

## Sources

Full 100 Stat Man playlist:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0TvnDoA1-SQ&list=PLcXPLd\_I-oBoQ12jWSWlUlIJ6p41kl8z9&index=1