05/05/2020 - Butchering the Beast, Imp Interrogation and Racism at Rocksend

## TL: DR

* The group was chased by the troll back to the encampment where it was slain and chopped up for many purposes
* Pixie questioning revealed that there were many of them around and its name was ‘hairy bitch'
* Traveled to Rocksend and sought accommodation but Scribbulus , as a halfling, wasn’t allowed in - Ash, Khrom  and Kelda remained with him outside the main town
* Kunai , Blagden , Tamsin , Elyan  and Wilbur entered the town and spoke to the Captain, a very unpleasant fellow, before deciding to leave again rather than pay his extortionate rates

## **Campcomings**

Time stood still as Khrom's lasso arced majestically before looping neatly over Frederick’s head. ‘Frederick, they’ve got you!!’, nayed the second and more anxious horse, seeing his companion restrained. While Khrom  reeled Frederick in with easy tugs of his massive paws, Kelda began uttering soothing words to the frantic one. ‘It’s ok, we’re just trying to take you back to somewhere you’ll be more protected’. Its simple mind was eased by her dulcet tones and it visibly relaxed, before offering a reassuring word to Frederick. ‘Come along, they’re going to take us somewhere safe’. Job done, Kelda led them efficiently back to the camp to find only Tamsin  waiting.

Meanwhile, Scribbulus  marvelled at the regenerative capabilities of the troll as it thundered after them. It remained closely on Wilbur’s heel despite the withering hail of projectiles and lashing chains coming from Blagden  and Kunai , both jogging easily alongside in their fighting retreat. He was troubled by its apparent return from death a few moments prior and cast his mind back to previous experiences of such beasts. In a flash of insight, an old halfling rhyme occurred to him\* - only a burn of some description, be it fire or acid in nature, could halt the remarkable healing properties of the monster. He sighed in relief that he had not found himself in the presence of the unnatural malignancy of undeath.

Those who went ahead, Elyan , Ash  and Gimble, turned their heads as the cacophony of a troll chase came into earshot and were soon embroiled into the chase themselves. They all burst from the treeline into the camp, succinctly informing those relaxing there of the imminent attack. ‘Guys, troll’. Everyone jumped into action. Ash wisely set about tying up the horses on the far side of the camp while Khrom primed his javelin, Kunai  manoeuvred to ambush from behind, Tamsin  began charging a chromatic orb and Elyan  prepared to savage it.

\*"When fighting a troll and it falls down flaccid, finish it off with fire or acid" - unknown halfling

## **Trooooooollll!!!!! in the camp**

A brief moment of tension was rent asunder as the troll blasted out of the vegetation, powerful limbs flailing in rage. Elyan  gave him no time to take stock of the surroundings before laying into his appearance, ‘I would say you’re as ugly as an ogre, but that’d be an insult to ogres!!’. Unfortunately it barely heard Elyan  over it’s own roars and barrelled onwards, heedless of Khrom's javelin as it bounced off its toughened hide like a matchstick. It was momentarily stunned when Tamsin's  violently crackling sphere of lightning burst across its chest, but was recklessly driven forwards by its own pulsating rage. Seeing this seemingly unstoppable wall of violence and muscle erupt into the camp, Gimble, who was already having an off day, did naught but scream.

Providing a counterpoint to the chaotic surroundings, Kelda began a calm and gentle murmuring. Despite the ambient daylight and thick cloud cover, a purplish silvery beam of moonlight lanced down from above. The troll bellowed in frustration as the leathery skin of its scalp and shoulders began to sear in the ethereal radiance, but was otherwise unimpeded in its rampage. However, everyone present felt a surge of fortitude as a small bear totem flickered into existence in the centre of the camp. Barely having finished his sentence of savagery, Elyan  switched to a different tactic. With a mere arcane whisper he reminded the troll of what it had been laughing about earlier, and it fell about clutching its stomach as it struggled to breathe through its barbarous giggling. Satisfied, Elyan  then buoyed Khrom’s spirit with noble words of encouragement. Blagden  naturally took the opportunity with his mage hand and went in for the pockets. Thankfully he had a rudimentary awareness of physiology and the hand successfully reached into the clinkier of the sacks present in the region, pulling out a satisfying handful of copper.

Kunai  saw the vulnerability of the prone troll and struck, but withdrew back into the foliage with a hiss as his blade thudded into the earth by the writhing form. Tamsin  did not hold back. A second orb of sparking static arced across its skin, leaving a fractal branching pattern of blackened flesh. This seriously dampened its amusement. As did the subsequent dual charge of Ash  and Khrom . Still on the ground, the troll reeled as a mighty blade cleft into its shoulder and a psychic fist rapped its head, rocking it sharply to the side. However, far from being out of the fight, the beast gave Khrom an appalling toothy grin as its wounds began to reknit themselves once more. It stood and clamped its jaws down hard on the Bugbear’s shoulder, piercing his skin and eliciting a grunt of pain, though Khrom kept his nerve and deflected a brutal clawed strike at his midsection.

As Khrom  remained defiant under its onslaught, the skin of the troll continued to sizzle and blister under Kelda’s moonbeam and it began to falter. Elyan  capitalised on its hesitation and whispered a fragmented melody that grew and grew into a great crescendo of entropic noise. The troll’s mind finally collapsed under the acoustic barrage and it slumped, lifeless, to the floor. Blagden  was at once on and around the corpse, probing for goodies. More measured, Kunai  held himself primed in case the troll returned to life once more. With a sad sigh, Scribbulus  made directly for the troll and asked anyone with some fire-making ability to join him. Tamsin  and Khrom  offered to help, and he directed them to create one beside the troll. With a click of her fingers, Tamsin  summoned a roaring fire. A single tear rolling down his cheek, Scribbulus  lifted the troll’s meaty hand and held a finger over the fire until it singed.

## **Loot Macabre**

Khrom  then promptly lit a torch and clubbed it around the face, for good measure, making Tamsin  tut at Scribbulus’s  convoluted methods. Elyan  eyed Blagden  eagerly counting the bounty of copper pieces and cheeky few silver pieces from the troll’s pouch, and suggested sharing it out. ‘Blagden  earned it’, Tamsin  insisted. ‘The rest of us were busy trying to kill it’, Khrom  retorted, evidently unimpressed with the Goblin’s battlefield priorities. Privately, Blagden  asked Tamsin  if he should give Elyan  a silver piece but between them they quickly decided that was a silly idea. In the end, a mighty 1789 copper pieces were added to the bag of golding once Scribbulus finished mourning. Meanwhile, Khrom  and Kunai  turned their attentions to the corpse. Guided by the expertise of Kelda and Scribbulus , they began their bloody harvest. Kunai  recovered both legs, efficiently released the bones from their fleshy confines and began sharpening them for use as javelins. Khrom  drained some of its viscous blood into a vial and decided to keep the head, knowing full well that its regeneration may yet have more to give.

## **Pixie Knows-a-Lott**

Blagden  was satisfied with his shinies and becoming bored by the troll dissection when he remembered that he still carried a pixie prisoner. He gathered Tamsin  and Elyan  to wake it up. ‘Excuse me, can you hear me? Are you awake?’, Elyan  asked politely in Sylvan. No reaction. Blagden  poked it. Still nothing. Blagden  drew forth the grass whistle he stole earlier, drew a breath, and blew it right next to its tiny ear. It awoke with a start, gagging on the dirty rag still stuffed in its mouth. ’Now, I’ll take the rag away if you promise not to do any funny business…otherwise you’ll end up like him’, Elyan  declared menacingly, while rotating the diminutive figure to see the butchery taking place behind them. The pixie looked sufficiently terrified that he withdrew the rag with pinched fingers.

‘Right, why did you cause so much trouble?’.

‘For fun, innit! We laugh at you, make jokes of you!'

‘If you’re not gonna be helpful…’, Elyan  trailed off, with a threatening glint in his eye.

‘I’m being as helpful as I can be!’, it insisted.

‘Where’s your home? How many are you’

‘Here, in the woods! We roam…and there are hundreds of us.’

‘What were you doing with the troll?’

‘We tricked you into finding the troll…it’s funny, didn’t think you’d die!’

Elyan  relayed what he’d learned to the others, exciting Blagden  with the prospect of ‘hundreds of whistles!’. After debating whether to kill it, release it or keep it on a leash, Elyan  turned back to the pixie.

‘We can’t trust you.’

‘You can!!’

‘We’ll keep you tied up and if there’s any funny business we’ll kill you.’

It was then revealed that the pixie had seen a ‘similar group’ pass by recently, but of orcs.

‘’They were here uuuuuuuuuuuuummmmmmmmm…2 hours ago!’

'How many?'

‘500’

This estimate quickly rounded down to a more reasonable 6 with a brief trip to Kunai’s  bone-sharpening workshop. Elyan  asked Khrom  to look after the pixie from now and he agreed, before politely introducing himself. ‘Stupid hairy bitch!’, the pixie responded sassily. ‘He says his name is hairy bitch’, Elyan  relayed drily. ‘Nice to meet you, hairy bitch’. It was agreed that after a brief rest they would continue and, provided that they moved at a steady pace and kept a wary eye out, the gang of orcs should remain safely ahead.

## **The End of Rocks**

The journey to Rocksend went as expected, with hairy bitch mostly subdued and only minor regrowth from the neck of the troll’s head. As they travelled, Blagden  asked Tamsin  to identify his "sticky pocket" for him, discovering that he had a dose of Boggle oil. As they wound their way down the valley they began to notice boats emerging from the mountain region. They sat low in the water, packed to brimming with copper ore and were captained by typically just one ATC worker. The stout walls of Rocksend came into view in the late afternoon, and shortly thereafter the ramshackle slum sprawled out beside it, dwarfing the fort. Between the two were a uniform line of tents, each sporting an extended queue of despondent halflings.

As they approached the gates of Rocksend, Elyan  suggesting finding lodging for the evening and they followed Kunai’s  march to the main gate. There they met three rough-looking guards in ATC uniform, two orcs (or majority orcish) and one human. ‘Greetings, gentlemen’, Kunai  opened warily, unsure of what reception to expect. The guards grunted a greeting, equally suspicious of this peculiar bunch. ‘We are on business with the archaeologists guild of Ilbidor and already spent time with your people in Branxom. Would you be able to provide us with lodgings?’. ’This is a question for Captain Marfire, this is unusual for us to deal with’, they conceded, beckoning the group through.

Just past the gate, Elyan  suggested the time may be ripe to let the pixie go free. Khrom  nodded and set it down, declaring ‘goodbye, hairy bitch’. Freed, it immediately made a b-line for the gate with guards hot on its heels. ‘It’s ok, it’s just hairy bitch’, Khrom  insisted, but they ignored him. ‘Get the hairy bitch!!’. The last they ever saw of it was wriggling out of a guard’s grasp and around out the gate. ‘You must leave your weapons here’, the guard who had remained with them, and watched the whole endeavour with some amusement, stated. ‘Makes sense’, Kunai  said bluntly. He flipped out the chain dagger, caught it in mid-air, spun with the chain in a metallic serpentine helix around his blurred form, re-coiled it and placed it into the guards hand. His dagger was still very much secreted on his person. Khrom  drew his glaive and laid that in. Then he pulled the two hand-axes off his belt. Then 5 javelins from his back. Then the two extra bone javelins that Kunai  made for him.

Scribbulus was still enamoured with Kunai’s  show and back to applaud, drawing the guard’s attention for the first time. 'Not you here! Over there is for your kind!’, he gesticulated angrily. Assuming the guard had an issue with Wilbur, Scribbulus tried to explain ‘oh, he’s harmless'. ’No, you. Over there!’, the orc repeated forcefully. ‘Oh…I was in Branxom if that makes a difference?’, Scribbulus tried meekly. The guards suddenly all found themselves in shade. Turning, all three came face-to-chest with Khrom , who was deeply unimpressed by their lack of manners. ‘Our companions will ALL be coming in’, he stated firmly, before calmly plucking up a guard by the head. ‘It’s honestly all fine!’, Scribbulus insisted as the other guards all partially drew their sabres. Turning at commotion, Kunai  paced back over calmly. ‘Excuse me gentlemen, for one moment’. He got as close as he could to Khrom’s  ear. ‘Whilst I applaud your defence of our companion, this village is already very tense. Speak to the halflings, gather what information you can. I will do the same from the inside’. Reluctantly, Khrom  agreed and dropped the kicking soldier. ‘Well I’m not going in if they won’t have Scribbs’, Ash  declared nobly, and was backed up by both Kelda and Khrom . The four of them strolled towards the slum while Blagden , Tamsin , Kunai , Elyan  and a nonchalant Wilbur rambled onwards.

In the centre of the fort lay a substantial wooden manor house that the guard led them towards. Unfortunately along the path, something shiny caught Blagden’s  eye. Off to the right lay a small market with stalls selling everything from food and clothing up to, to Blagden’s  interest, rocks and geodes. He scampered off, followed rapidly by the others. 'Excuse me…yes? Are you good at rocks? You know how much they’re worth?’, Blagden  inquired. ‘Well, I know how much I’d charge for things...’, replied the vendor, peering over the desk at the inquisitive goblin. Blagden  got an estimate for the golden rock he retrieved from Ilbidor mine (finding it to be pyrite worth approx. 3 SP), as well as acquiring a fun piece of veined copper ore for the bargain price of 3 silver pieces. He was grinning from ear-to-ear and turning the rock in his hands, fascinated, as they finally made their way to the manor house. Wilbur had attracted quite a crowd in the meantime, making the walk fairly uncomfortable for the attention-averse Kunai  and Tamsin .’What you lookin’ at?’, Tamsin  demanded of the captivated crowd.

At the door, Kunai  put his hand on Wilbur’s nose and asked him to remain outside. The ankylosaurus gave his entire arm a hearty lick and slumped down to the floor, immediately chilled out and ambivalent to the attention he received. They entered a single broad chamber and were immediately greeted by a musty odour of congealed, unwashed sweat. It did not take a genius to work out the source. A brutish-looking orc reclined dead-centre of the room, his muddy boots propped up on a large table and his armour and uniform unkempt at best. ‘They just turned up, Sir. Said something about lodgings’, the guard introduced them eloquently. ‘Ok. Go away!’, the Captain commanded brusquely.

'Good day sir, thank you for permitting us entry to your magnificent house.’, Kunai  opened diplomatically.

'Absolutely, what do you want?’, the Captain demanded, appearing almost drunk and uncaring of his filthy appearance as he turned their gaze to them.

'We’ve had a weary journey and just need somewhere to stay for the night.'

‘You are going to become employee?'

'No, just need somewhere to stay.'

'Why would we give you lodgings if you aren’t going to be one of us?'

'Who is us?'

'Those of us who put the halflings in their place.'

'We have had dealings with your captains in Branxom.'

'In Branxom they are soft!!’, he snorted indignantly.

'We are on good dealings with your superiors.'

'Ah Horden this, Horden that!’, he declared, getting irritated.

'He’s a right dog this one!’, Blagden  quipped quietly to the others.

'If you grease my pockets maybe I’ll let you stay.'

'How much?’, Kunai  sighed.

'What do hotels go for these days, huh? 10 gold pieces each!!’, the Captain pronounced.

‘That’s ridiculous.'

'Flat refusal, so sad, ok! What do you come here for anyway? Bother my time \*unknown grunting\* time?'

'You gonna let me talk?’, Tamsin  asked pointedly.

‘\*unknown grunting\* its my chamber.'

‘You’re not gonna get an answer if you keep talking over me.'

'I like this one she’s tough. Yes you can talk.'

‘Were here to fix the past archaeologists mess and just need somewhere to stop tonight.'

‘Ok lots of places outside, you give me offer.’

‘Inside, preferably.'

'If you don’t like 10 gold pieces then be like halflings - sleep in shit!’

‘Why do you hate the halflings so much anyway?'

'Halflings are scum, they do nothing, live on own filth - sing stupid songs nothing but forest \*unknown grunting\* make it beautiful'

'It appears you have nothing to offer us.'

‘\*unknown grunting\* accommodation.'

‘We’ll pass our regards son to Horden when we get back to Branxom.'

‘\*unknown grunting\* give any regards to Horden fucking dick!!'

‘Why don’t you like heron lady?’, Blagden  queried.

‘\*unknown grunting\* ooh Horden so high and mighty blah blah blah.'

‘Why don’t you kill her then?'

‘Why don’t you kill her for me then I give you accommodation, ah?'

‘Well you’re clearly an idiot’, Kunai  concluded.

‘I'm not an idiot I don’t need to convince you shit!’, the Captain yelled as they made their hasty exit.

As they returned to the cool, not-Marfire-y air of the outside, Kunai  turned to the guard. ‘Between you and me, what’s your opinion of Marfire?’. ‘Absolute cunt’, he stated bluntly. ‘Is this common amongst the guards?’. The guard shrugged. ’Some, yes. But some just hate the halflings'. ‘What did the halflings ever do to you?! They lived here first!’, Tamsin  demanded, getting more and more frustrated by their ignorant hatred. ’They are stupid, lazy…you go over there and see their shit hole, it’s a mess!’, the guard protested. Kunai  put his hand on her arm, hoping to avoid another scene. Back to the guard, he made a proposal. ‘Do a whip-round of the guards for me. See who shares your opinion of the Captain and I’ll find you when we return’. ‘I’ll get check board, make list’, the guard nodded along, seeming to enjoy having orders.

As they returned to Wilbur, his crowd had only grown. Blagden  seized the opportunity to glance back at his new favourite stall. The vendor was also clearly busy ogling the dinosaur and totally unaware when the finest, bluest geode of his entire collection began bobbling towards the goblin - little did the poor fellow know that it was no longer part of his collection. Blagden  took a brief moment to appreciate its polished sky blue surface and intricate copper veining, then stashed it out of sight.

With Rocksend having delivered little, they set off after the other half of the party. As they passed by the line of tents, Tamsin  glanced in. Halflings were clearly reporting to the station before being led off for transport to the mountain mines. She approached a queue at random.

‘What are you doing here?’

’This is a work scheme - we go up the mountain and mine to earn money to survive', replied a bedraggled halfling.

‘Everyone does this?’

‘Lots do, a big fraction of the people from town, anyway.’

’There is no other work for halflings?’

’Some work on big farms in the north, but not really.’

‘You’re not prisoners?’

‘Not officially…’, the halfling trailed off as the queue shuffled up a place, and he continued his depressing journey.

*We will resume with the second group as they enter the slums to find a nights rest...*