recursal/Fanatic-Fandom huggingface dataset:
DS9 319

Poster by J.J. LendL

Malibu Picard?

*(S)Miles O'Brien jakes Sisko into the fabulously coiffed Mirror Universe so he can pull a Mitchell Gant and snag his alt-ex and her Firefox-level rebel sniffer.*

*Sisko's willingness to fire his "torpedo" to get the job done makes me feel cheated! How could TNG not give us the Mirror Riker episode! He was born to live here!*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Sisko**

For being a sex tourist in the Mirror Universe
Ben's pick is **Sisko**

For taking a whole 5 seconds to recognize his wife
## Trading Cards

Whips Out A Pistol And A Glowing Beer CanBelongs At A Michael Landon ConventionWants To Fuck Her...And Unequivocally Does!Two For Two! Great Day For Ben SiskoA Lot Less Sexy In Ore ProcessingJohn Woo Escape SceneHung Like A Prime Universe DartboardHe's Thinking About "Hat Trick"
DS9 616

Casperia Prime

*When their World Series of Tongo hopes crap out Worf & Dax have to go back to work retrieving a CardiLeaks truther from an Italian Predator rip off jungle set. O'Brien talks Bashir into trying to "Joachim" Dax's Tongo bust.*

*A firefight with the Jem'Hadar gives Dax plenty of time to bleed! Saving her means no chance of him ever getting his Captain Worf series. Bashir tries his "Tongo for Dummies" moves on Quark and he does NOT win the Falcon.*

## Show Bits

* Raw Materials
* The Scene Does Not Go Well Enterprise
* Episode Over-Cut to theme
* The Single Brass Instrument Of Subtext
* Klingon Dong Redundancy
* Julian Bashir: Piss Freak
* What my theory presupposes is...
* Un-adjective X-Men

## P1 Messages

Happy Birthday

Happy Anniversary

## Drunk Shimoda

Daily Double! **Bashir**

For speed-reading the rules of tongo
## Trading Cards

My Levels Of Depravity Do Not Get To Where I Enjoy Watching Gambling At AllHe's In Communication With A Higher Power So She Has To Stop TalkingJust Pick A Third Podcast Neither Of Us Listen To As A CompromiseIt's A Suitcase With Latinum But It Doesn't Sound High StakesAhh...Jungle Sounds. Kaw-Kaw! Ah-Ohga! I'm Gonna Shoot!!!!!!Not Time To "Both Sides" The Jem'Hadar. Shoot First!It Looks Like A Strawberry. That's How You Know It's BadI Saved You Because The Needs Of My Dicks Outweigh The Needs Of The Many
Garrett Wang props horder

In  the first episode to feature Flotter — the fluffy water person — Ben and Adam discovered that the prop for the doll was designed by Garrett Wang. This being a dick and fart joke centered podcast, things quickly went downhill from there.

Anyway, now all props that can conceivably be used as a sex toy were put up for auction and purchased by Garret Wang.

Please don't ask him about it.
Jazz Horse

t-shirt at jazz.horse

## Pod Apperances

Special:WhatLinksHere/Jazz Horse

Jazz Horse is the name that Ben and Adam have given to the popular Rockstar video game *Red Dead Redemption 2,* which both of them play, so much so that they've begun a segment checking in on each other's lives as Arthur Morgan and/or their online versions of themselves, accompanied by music from The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild, a totally different video game.

The name Jazz Horse is likely a reference to the Onion review, 'Red Dead Redemption 2' Delivers With A Beautifully Rendered World, But Stumbles As An Immersive Experience Due To Its Smooth Jazz Soundtrack

## RSVP Adam's Horses

Ginuwine
Horsey Thicc
DS9 504

Julian Bashir as a patient.

*Bashir and Jake answer a distress call from a colony on Planet Alamo under attack by Klingons going "Procedure 033-03" on the Federation Sandmen there. They're up to their scrubs in broken life clocks with no Sanctuary in sight.*

*The county fair pyro is heating up & everyone is covered in burst ketchup packets. It's all causing Jake to become less Ernie Pyle and more General Owen. Will the Klingons take Bronson Canyon? Is the pen mightier than the Bat'leth?*

## Opening Segment

Conversation about touring, tech problems and not meeting Jonathan Frakes.

## Show Bits

* The Little D
* Klingon Dong Redundancy
* Star Trek Caves
* RSVP
* Bangers
* The Scene Does Not Go Well Enterprise
* Julian Bashir: Piss Freak

## P1 Messages

Commercial Message for Brode Drinking Vitamins

with discount code
Blank Message

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Kira and Dax**

Reaction take during Quark's womb rental speech
Ben's pick is **Bolian solider**

For being Francis Buxton
## Trading Cards

Jake's Facial Expression Says, "Bashir Is Up His Own Ass"Give Worf The Terrible Drink! It's What He's There For!The Gets Peter Preston-edHe Can't Sleep On Real PillowsVery Gentle Artillery FireIs This Willem DaFoe's Brother?Shut The Fuck Up, Francis!Jake "Home Alone's" The Klingons
## Transcript

Official Maxfun Transcript
DS9 407

Poster by J.J. LendL

Season 1 Bashir

*The Defiant is out in the financial frontier when it gets in a Grand Banks style beatdown with some Akula-Hadar. All troupes are running hot they're all about to die! Guess they shouldn't have taken the whole DS9 command staff.*

*Worf gets a Best of Both Worlds do-over that burns all the ticks off the Little D! The day is saved and everyone sees Montana. But off camera, a craps gauntlet is thrown down that could change the balance of power at STLV!*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **O'Brien**

Nothing super specific, but his leadership style and fun faces when Worf is a dick
Ben's pick is **Enrique Muniz**

Trying to take his lunch break during an emergency
## Trading Cards

I'm Sorry If The Bathroom Seat's Still WarmDug In Like An Alabama TickPlease Bashir... Don't Say Anything!He's Gonna Be OK...Right?Can One Of Us Put On A Fake Beard And Give The Order?An Adam & Ben Situation That Hasn't Played OutMorn Sits Far From The Dartboard These DaysWhat Do You Think The Hot Dogs At Quark's Taste Like?
(Butt)Hole Closer

## Pod Apperances

Special:WhatLinksHere/(Butt)Hole Closer

In "Indiscretion" Kira is trapped in a cave with Dukat. They are thrust together for reasons. Anyway, at one point Dukat sits on a sharp rock and gets a major new hole, right near his old hole.

Kira gives Dukat a tool from the Starfleet issue medkit to heal the wound. Essentially he closes the new hole, but hopefully not the old hole. Both Kira and Dukat find this hilarious and they bond.

So a (butt)hole closer is the tool used to repair wounds.

What you should take away from this is: When Ben and Adam say (butt)hole closer they mean dermal regenerator.
STLD 0207

About to have a crown laid upon his sweet head

*When Billups’ mother needs help fixing her broken starship, she’s unusually encouraging of her son mixing business and pleasure. But when Boimler and Mariner are marooned on a planet with a hostile computer, a happy ending for them seems far more in doubt.*

## Show Bits

* Pizza Oven Killing Shirt
* To The Dome
* Bangers
* Dr. Katz
* Hoofs

## P1 Messages

From the past

Impression request

This Old Starship
Kevin Uxbridge
## Edward Larkin

Adam's pick is **Fiddle player**

for providing a great moment
Ben's pick is **AGIMUS**

chaos agent
DS9 720

Gul Rusot

*Worf and Ezri return just as the Breen make an all out assault on the matte painting of San Francisco! Clearly, the only response is to discuss the Pepper Protocols and play some rounds of Axis & Allies Alamo edition!*

*Winn's copy of "Unleashing Pah-wraiths for Dummies" seems to be written in demonic lemon juice! The new Dominion takes out Starfleet's attack force, including the Little D, as easy as M-80s took out AMT model kits!*

## Show Bits

* Jazz Horse
* For Some Reason Jake
* Admiral Belt Buckle
* RSVP
* Girders
* Worf Lightning

## P1 Messages

From Facebook

To Ben and Adam

List of Drops
## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Gul Damar**

For being in the pre-consquences phase of a big life decision
Ben's pick is **Gul Rusot**

For his line delivery
## Trading Cards

Bashir Gets The Hug Equivalent Of The "Too Slow" High FiveIs Boothby Bleeding Out Under An Elm Tree????You Don't Cook Another Man's Peppers!Ezri Wants To Play With Bashir. Worf Just Wants To Play With The Alamo.It's A Blaaaaaaank!Does He Live On DS9 Now?Hit With Lethal Keiko Lightning!He Was Just Trying To Avoid The Late Fees
DS9 315

Poster by J.J. LendL

Space Butthole

*Starfleet wants to boost download speed in the Gamma Quadrant by running high-speed internet through the butthole. But when the project requires a Cardy work crew a Bajoran Carnac claims that will make the butthole go full Poltergiest.*

*When Vedek That Guy's cookie fortunes start coming true Sisko starts thinking - Destiny! Destiny! There's no escaping Destiny! The crew has a crazy plan to keep the butthole from being Armageddoned and Sisko thinks...IT...COULD...WORK!*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **O'Brien**

The scene in the jefferies tube
Ben's pick is **Bajoran security guard in the Cardassian ship**

For awkward walking, seemingly not wanting to be on camera and for being on a Cardassian ship in the first place
## Trading Cards

The Champagne Is Brown. Very, Very BrownA Fan Of Bird Badnighter? Brent Brunt Muncher?A Nice Flattop Fade70 Million Light Years Away From The RouterHow Ben Looks At A Group DinnerShe's Thirsty For O'BrienDoes Not Go To Plan!Good Lord! Were They Wearing These The Whole Time?
DS9 317

Poster by J.J. LendL

*When his non-OSHA approved repair job starts Timecoping him into the future, O'Brien has to quiz all the Malibu Miles' he meets to avoid a torpedo funeral. The breadboxes are in town to collect interest payment on the Defiant's cloak.*

*After O'Brien's leaping shows DS9 getting eh-sploded he goes TWOK Spock & blasts himself with 12 Monkeys juice to find a way out. The Romulans want everyone's Facebook data so they can look for changelings and create junk mailing lists.*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Bashir**

For failing to see the magic in events
Ben's pick is **Quark**

For only caring about beating fate for profit
## Trading Cards

He's Not Weight Bearing On Those Back LegsMake Sure Ya Dahtboard Isn't Next To Any BahstoolHe Needs To Remember What His Limbs Were DoingTwo O'Briens In A Bar Fight Is An Unfair AdvantageDude? Dude? ...Bro!Detecting Rubbermaid LogoFucking Great Explosion!Why Isn't He Sleeping Under A Blanket!
Drunk Shimoda: Deep Space Nine

Main article: Drunk Shimoda

The DS9 rankings:

* 26.5 - Bashir
* 23.5 - Sisko
* 20.5 - O'Brien
* 18 - Quark
* 12 - Odo
* 11.5 - Kira
* 11 - Garak
* 8.5 - Worf
* 8 - Morn
* 7.5 - Rom
* 7 - Nog
* 7 - Jake
* 6.5 - Jadzia
* 5 - Weyoun
* 4.5 - Dukat
* 1.5 - Ezri

For the purposes of scoring, half points are awarded to characters who only *share* one of the hosts' distinction for that episode.
DS9 103

Gul Danar

*A Bajorian Snowden arrives! Kira shows hair & makeup who's boss! Bashir finally gets a date! Xenophobe plans to plug the butthole with a warrior's suppository and make Bajor a cul-de-sac.*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Nana Visitor**

For successfully leveraging her part into having a shorter haircut
Ben's pick is **Garak**

For smarmy charisma
## Trading Cards

An Awkward First DateHigh And TightThis Fucking Blow Dry Job!Focus On The UnderboobGreat At Rat. Sucks At Humanoid.Wheeler Dealer!Bashir Is The Buffoon Of The SeriesA Great Moment In Wheelman History!
DS9 620

*It's an old story. Goo meets girl. Goo falls for girl. Girl is not sure about Goo. Goo, with centuries of resources to choose from, decides to take love life advice from an anachronistic hologram that looks like T.J. Hooker's cop buddy.*

*Odo thinks he's upgraded to holo doll Kira version 2.0 but it's the real Kira! When she learns what's been going on she punches them both! Wait...she doesn't? It works??? That sound you hear is the audience facepalming simultaneously.*

## Show Bits

* Pizza Oven Killing Shirt
* Honeysticks
* For Some Reason Jake

## P1 Messages

setting money on fire

pizza time

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Waiter**

for dropping his menu device at seeing Odo x Kira kiss
Ben's pick is **Cenobite**

for gasping at seeing Odo x Kira kiss
## Trading Cards

Did They Go To That TNG Planet With The Casino?It's A Fiftiesy Tux But Not Vegas FiftiesyLearning To Have Fun With The Thing He Doesn't Know How To DoWhy Do You Tertiary Characters Want Us Main Cast To Fuck?It's The Pizza Oven Killing Outfit As Evening WearThis Is A Leah Brahms Situation A-Brewing!Remember How Uncomfortable You Were With Holo Kira? Well...Some Of The People See How Silly This Was
DS9 507

Morn holding a flower for one of his lady-friends.

*A weekend vacation to Planet DTF is starting to look like a Fleetwood Mac "Behind the Music." Everyone is going their own way except Worf, who refuses to make loving fun for Dax or anyone else around him.*

*Worf meets the Risian Buzz who wants to turn the place from the Royal Flamingo to the Hotel Coral Essex. Can this warrior in paradise find a way to save the sex conference & win back the love of his Courtney Trill-Smith?*

## Opening Segment

Code 47

U.S.S. Firebrand model

U.S.S. Curry model

## P1 Messages

Commercial Podcast Message

Impression Request

Vichy Frenchman
## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Bashir**

For being aloof while being a fish out of water
Ben's pick is **Rando Crewman**

For not realizing she's on a date until Morn gives her a flower
## Trading Cards

Ben, Have You Ever Had A Sex Injury?We're Coming On Your Romantic Getaway!!!Quark's Presense Is Never Going To Make Worf HappyIt's The Way Kirk Always Wanted To Go OutIt Should Have Two Mesh NetsI Thought You Were Lee Majors' More Expensive Amoral Successor!They're Making A Clay MornhammerWork No Longer Wants To Discuss Timeshares
## Transcript

Official Maxfun Transcript
DIS 311

## The USS Hentai

A book illustration of a Kelpien and a Ba'ul alongside the All-Seeing Eye as a symbol of protection.

## DIS 311

### Next Episode

Voyage of the Memes
Ho Ho Ho Now I’ve Got a Dot-23

*Disco finally reaches the source of the BURN and it's more radioactive than a sub reactor in a Tom Clancy film. Burnham, Culber & Saru beam down leaving Tilly to Saavik it up & take the conn. No Kobayashi Maru vibes here, amaright???*

*The landing party gets put through the witness protection filter and must decipher the oldest Kelpi-kid's neverending story before he reburns the galaxy. Tilly matches George Kirk's command time but Osyraa ain't no slouch like Nero.*

## Show Bits

* Dr. Katz
* Dadmiral
* Clip Show Device

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Doug Jones**

for getting to act with his own hands and face
Ben's pick is **Burnham**

for facing the unknown monster alone
## Trading Cards

Baby, When I Go Away It's Awesome! You Should Stand A Little Closer To Windows!Hey, You Fixed Me. Could You Do The Same For This?I Really Liked Not Liking Season 1 And 2 Stamets. When's He Coming Back?You'd Think The Burr Tolerances On A Starship Would Be Higher Than A Commercial AirlinerHe Still Showed Up On Set Six Hours Early Out Of HabitShe Turns Into Badgey!Oh Gross! People Jack Off To This!Will Osyraa Be Able To Find The Bean?
Life Rules by Ben and Adam

Occasionally on the pod, Ben and Adam drop some etiquette knowledge on their viewers. So far, they feel quite strongly that:

1. Seats in airplanes must never be reclined. Frequent fliers for work, they are adamant that a passenger's personal knee space should not be infringed.
	* Don't talk to someone with headphones on. Your seat mate is not your personal conversation partner.
	* Don't block the jetway. You can't just sit on the ground wherever you please.
2. Don't touch the screen. Specifically, do not place your oily fingers on other peoples' computer monitors, tablets, etc. Also, if you can reach said screens, you're standing too close.
3. Leave without saying goodbye. Guests should quietly depart gatherings and parties without making a spectacle. Never drawing attention to oneself in social situations is a given, especially if it is your own party.
4. When interacting with someone in a customer service position: be polite, be kind, tip well, be brief.
5. Don't do bits on tips. When interacting with a captive audience who is relying on you for their recompense, do not do bits. This is probably an extension of 4 but deserves its own rule.
	* No bits on returning veterans. Maybe feel them out and see where they're at with the injury they sustained before you're like 'Aye, strong as an ox! Ready to get back to work! Attaboy!'
6. The bathroom in an RV is for #1s only.
7. TGG must be listened to at 1x speed.
8. When waving at a stranger, no wiggly fingers.

18. What comes around, goes around (AKA the Uxbridge-Shimoda Promise)

69. Don't use the bathroom wearing dry trunks.

It should be noted there was a temporary alternate Rule 4: "No hand wrapping". This rule was specifically mentioned during a discussion of rear-end-cleaning during DS9 Season 3 Episode 2, but it was then retracted during the episode's Maron Opening, with the understanding that the rule wouldn't affect people getting along or being nice to each other.

## References

1. ↑ DS9 703
original episode citations needed
DS9 220

The surface of Volan III.

Maques/Maquis

*Ewh, Ewh, what'a'ya do, when the Maquis kill a crew? The Cardis make a big ole fuss. But Bernie Casey's here for us! Hey, Hey what'a'ya say? Quark's got guns don't need ruffies. The DMZ's a big ole bust. Sisko's day just bit the dust!*

*The Empire is determined to crush the Rebellion with one swift stroke, but it's Dukat who gets bounty hunted. Sisko takes off for Reverse Hoth only to get swerved by his buddy, Ersatz Lando Calrissian. I got a bad feeling about this.*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Calvin Hudson**

For his crushing turn at the end
Ben's pick is **Gul Evek**

When he has to wait outside with the body for the entire scene
## Trading Cards

Things Will Be Better Once Worf Gets HereNobody's Looked Better In Uniform Since Will RikerThe Face Of CardassiaAre You A Cop? You Have To Tell Me!He's Well TreatedThey Really Kick Dukat's Ass!Review Procedures! This Is Bullshit!Looks Pretty Humid
DS9 310

Poster by J.J. LendL

*It's space Thanksgiving but it's not a "wish" bone everyone is fighting over. The O'Briens have gone full Honeymooners, Odo's gone Pepe Le Pew and Bareil just needs to be gone...because he sucks!*

*A strange force is making it hard on everyone to maintain rigid standards. Keeping abreast of the situation has some making out while others get the shaft. Will they all come together to put the Deep Space (I)X in sex or just blow it?*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Balls Guy**

For turning the episode into a circus
Ben's pick is **Keiko**

For stopping in the airlock doorway
## Trading Cards

What Is Your "Sexy Time" Limit On Coffee?She's Got A Special PositionThe O'Briens Are Back!...At!...It!He's Not Having It!What The Fuck Are You Wearing, Quark?Everyone's Pointing Dicks Or Tits At SomeoneI Want That!As Horrified As We've Ever Seen Her
DIS 211

Poster by J.J. LendL

Bit Origin: Contreland

*Vader's Death Star interrogator droid gives Leland the "Look Who's Talking" opening credits but those aren't little Bruce Willises swimming around. Burnham's mom won't communicate with her except through pocket podcasts.*

*Dr. Burnham insists the only way to save the universe is for the Disco crew to let her go back alone and steal Ted's dad's keys. Georgiou skips Biehn and goes full UniSol Van Damme on Leland's robot-infested ass!*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Spock**

For his pronunciation of 'Tze'
Ben's pick is **Spock**

Setting up a react gif by saying, "I like science"
## Trading Cards

Cranapple And Orange! What!?!?Clip Show Drone!Ugh! That's A Lot Of Mission Log!Is That A Real Fish Tank Back There Or A Screensaver?I've Named This Version Of Me, "Nay Nay"As An Element Of Spycraft, It's Not GoodYou Better Stab Him In Both GutsGiving Georgiou That Task Of Fist Fighting A Robot Was The Right Choice
DS9 404

Poster by J.J. LendL

Shave Ice Jacket

*O'Brien & Bashir crash on Arcadia 234 to find a Jem'Hadar Sgt. Todd & his 1996 infants trying to kick the ketra-China White habit. Bashir's down to help but O'Brien wants to go Caine 607 & take the first tiki-runabout outta town.*

*Miles goes scorched earth on Julian's proto-Nicoderm treatment. Worf tries to put a stop to Quark's Boss Hogg-ery but winds up with Owon egg on his face and finds out he's been on double-secret probation all semester!*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **O'Brien**

Making a non lethal weapon to combat the Jem'Hadar
Ben's pick is **Jem'Hadar that gets given Ketracel White**

For very casually administering the White to himself
## Trading Cards

Why Tolerate Quark? Why?Goran'Agar Oil And Goran'Agar Teri GarrI'm Looking For Dr. Cottle From BattlestarGod! The 16 Is Never On Time!I Gotta Eat Shit Served By Julian BashirPut Down The Mike's Hard Lemonade!Shoot The Experiment!A Probationary Period He Didn't Know He Was In
GGPW:Memory Alpha Images

Ever notice the impressive amount of high quality images they have on Memory Alpha? Need images for GG pages but don't want do your own screengrabs? Now you can Jake images from Memory Alpha!

* Use the standard image embedding code, just use a filename from Memory Alpha.
* Read up on the full details at w:Help:Shared\_images
* DO NOT UPLOAD IMAGES TO MEMORY ALPHA!
DS9 326

Poster by J.J. LendL

*The Little D is sent to do a stare down on some rowdy loafs but when the ride along ambassador turns Norwegian sled dog and golds out newly pipped Captain Sisko goes full MacReady and passes out the flamethrowers!*

*Bashir give everyone the Home Changeling Test and the strip turns blue on Eddington. But it's a frame! Bashir was Blair all along! Sisko's ready to blow the base unless Odo and O'Brien can take that Thing down!*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **O'Brien**

Incredulity in the face of having 2 changelings in the room with him
Ben's pick is **Bashir**

For his timing in revealing that he had been captured
## Trading Cards

I've Been Trying To Be More Physically ExpressiveVertiform City Levels Of TanglesHe Goes Gold!The Scene A Body Snatching Story PromisesGold In The Vial Means "Changeling"Couldn't Be Less ImpressedA Golden Hand JobA Pizza Stone At The Bottom Of An Oven
DS9 708

Subspace relay station icon

*Sisko and crew team up with a group of Oliver Stoned Starfleets to hold on to a captured Jem'Hadar cell phone tower. You'd think being underground would make its signal terrible.*

*Nog avoids the standard Trek eye trauma but gets leg distress instead. With the Jem'Hadar approaching Sisko goes mine for the second time, has everyone set phasers to "Alamo" & unleashes the most epic Star Trek cave battle!*

## Show Bits

* Klingon Dong Redundancy
* Honeysticks
* Bangers
* Star Trek Caves
* K urn
* Admiral Belt Buckle

## P1 Messages

To Ben & Adam

To Ben & Adam

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Vic Fontaine**

For letting Rom down easy
Ben's pick is **Worf**

For trying to glorify battle
## Trading Cards

Nadia Larkin! Any Relation To Edward Larkin?Guest Star, Will Robinson! Guest Star!When You Get Raymond Cruz This Is The Scene You Use Him InFerengi Always Hit That High Note When They Get HurtDon't Worry. Bashir Is Going To Lobotomize You Into Thinking You Were Always Missing The LegPeek-A-Boom!Platoon Vibes All The Way DownHe Made It Through Just Fine. But The Film Paper May Disagree
TNG 717

Motherfucking Snakes on the Motherfucking D!

*The Entrepreneur finds a comet filled with props left over from "The Fifth Element." Data drinks the Blood of Kali & goes rogue (what's new?) Pipes gets his BDSM Dread Pirate Roberts on!*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Geordi and Worf**

For beaming away from a fire in Engineering and making no effort to put it out
Ben's pick is **Picard**

For geeking out over ancient alien artifacts while the ship is in great danger
## Trading Cards

There's No Way To Not See LabiaEric Should Be Discouraged From SculptingCondo's Been Broken Into. Oh Well...So Long, 60-Million-Year-Old Ice LifeThe Styrofoamness Is Super TransparentFeelin' Weird!Initiate Limb Seperation!The Dumbest Possible Place To Take A Torpedo!This Is So Insane
TNG 216

Guinan, reacting defensively upon meeting Q

Bit Origin: Guinan's Bean Flick'n RoomBorgs

*Picard gets super salty when Q kidnaps him in a stolen Previa, but things go from bad to worse when the ship gets frisbeed into the path of the galaxy’s shittiest Rubik’s Cube. Does Guinan have the only locking door on the ship? Why are the Borgs so interested in the Jim Shimoda Memorial Corner? Is the crew even ready to go on star treks? It’s a very special episode of Borg Maury.*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Riker**

For (in Adam's mind) checking whether any of the Borg babies were his
Ben's pick is **Ensign Gomez**

For spilling a drink on Picard and hanging out in engineering like Shimoda did
## Trading Cards

A Lot Of Dryer DuctingPicard's Wet...AgainI'm Not Listening To Your Bullshit!She Feels A Special TingleFrisbee-Golfs The Enterprise Across The GalaxyIt's The Borgs!!!Hey Bro, Cut It Out!A Toilet!!!
DIS 212

Poster by J.J. LendL

*Discovery jumps to Klingon Gallifrey where Pike has to Dagobah tree his way to a new Oscillation Overthruster. Ash pulls a reverse Maury on Burnham and tells her he IS the father!*

*The Avengers...I mean, Discovery...has a Time Gem...I mean, Time Crystal...& are ready to battle Thanos...I mean, Control. Burnham & Spock find a standing desk survivor with screaming Donald Sutherland vibes.*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Michael Burnham**

Groaning like Lucy from the Peanuts' Gang
Ben's pick is **Michael Burnham and Spock**

For not inhabiting the truth of Kamran Gant's situation
## Trading Cards

He Had A Bay-Bay!The Stairs To CastlevaniaLunch Table SituationEven An Idiot Knows The SignificanceStill Want It? Hell Yeah!You Want To Cut Straight To Prevent HangnailsCustomary Discovery Stab In The EyeDeath Becomes Her Size Hole!
Data's self-harm impulses

Data in "Contagion" (S2E11) trying to get his totally unique, irreplaceable arm sliced off by putting it through an alien portal that he only just discovered.

## Pod Apperances

Special:WhatLinksHere/Data's self-harm impulses

It sure seems that, despite his being a nearly entirely unique being of special technological wonder and an overall boon to both Starfleet and sentient life in general, Commander Data sure seems pretty blasé about putting himself in mortal danger, to the point that Ben and Adam (and many others before and since) have remarked about his possible suicidal tendencies, with jokes often made in regards to missions or activities that could result in death being perfect for Data and his insatiable urge to end his androidy existence.
DS9 512

Founders: Cardassian for beer.

*It's a Three Men and Some Bajorans situation on DS9. Odo becomes the proud parent of a bubbling baby puddle. Shakaar blames Miles for jakeing his love triangle when baby O'Brien won't take the stage for Kira's hippie birth concert.*

*There's womb for only one man in front of Kira's stirrups according to Shakaar. Call Worf, Miles! Delivering your babies is his crowning achievement. Odo's baby gets sugar crystals and goes from "goo goo" to "gag gag."*

## Show Bits

* What my theory presupposes is...
* Pan Flute Music of Subtext

## P1 Messages

Commercial Message: "Don't review Voyager"

Personal Message: "Good Wedding"

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Shakaar**

For turning into a dope
Ben's pick is **Dr. Mora**

For not sending Odo a sick card
## Trading Cards

It Looks Like A Bottle Of AftershockDoes The Mug O' Baby Taste Like Rune Juice?I Shall Name You, "Novelty Vomit"The Only Emotion He Can Show: Mild IrritationPretty Good Face For A Sock Covered In VaselineHe Doesn't Want O'Brien Below The Mason Dixon LineWhah?!?!?! Where'd It Go?!?!?He Can Be Naked In Public Again!
## Transcript

Official Maxfun Transcript
DIS 301

Poster by J.J. LendL

*Burnham flies out of the time butthole and into a pretty severe car crash. After exchanging fists and driver information with Cleveland (It must have survived!!!) he lets her know this ain't the Wyld Stallyns future at all.*

*It's puff, puff, punch for Burnham as she & Book fight Trek Greedos, dilithium loan sharks & speedy Mornhammers to save his pet escargot. As thanks he takes her to meet the last Federation rep who must be a sentient Xanax.*

## Show Bits

* Episode Over-Cut to theme
* Kevin Uxbridge

## P1 Messages

happy anniversary

Kevin Uxbridge
from the future

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Ithor & Ithyk**

RSVP
Ben's pick is **Cosmo**

for inconsistent subterfuge
## Trading Cards

He Works From Home. Just Like Us!No One Screams Like SMGAre They Fighting Or Flirting?Nothing Funnier Than The Face Of A Cat Held Up By A Proud Cat DadBook "Landos" Her! It's A Double Cross!The Jazz Drone Gives Her A PuffIt Meets People Like A DogWhy Don't You Go To That Wall And Blast?
DIS 214

Poster by J.J. LendL

*Contreland plays the Star Trek: Beyond swarm card! The Clip Show Angel suit was built with VHS parts so Burnham has to be kind and rewind before returning. Trek breaks it's "no droids" streak with the FU-D2 unit!*

*Culber makes Stamets a Keanu "Speed" promise with Patric "Speed 2" written on it! Georgiou "Rocky 4's" Contreland! Bob takes a torpedo "Rogue One" style! Disco does a Randy Quaid "Independence Day" into the future!*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Disco Crew**

For re-vacuating a doomed ship
Ben's pick is **L'Rell**

For being the jealous girlfriend meme
## Trading Cards

A Big Gulp MomentUnnecessarily Cool. You Gotta Do ItIt's Really Pissing Her Off. It's 15 Minutes Until Doors!Deploy The Happy Meal ToysWe're Kicking This Bet Into Season 3!We Found The "Dancing On The Ceiling" Music Video Set!Takes It At Parade Rest! RSVP Admiral BobBye!
DS9 303

Poster by J.J. LendL

*It's "last call" for a Klingon who tries to stick Quark with a bar bill...and a knife! When he banana-peels to Sto-vo-kor, Quark tries to "Roadhouse" his way to badass fame.*

*Quark's House is a very, very, very bad house. With no coin in the jar. A wife who won't pon farr. And a guy who wants to bat'leth him in two! Oh, and the O'Briens are sad again.*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Scene with Quark's financial presentation to the Klingons**

For being a genuinely funny, well earned joke
Ben's pick is **Gowron**

For throwing his pad away
## Trading Cards

Ready To Lay That Hammer Down!They Do Not Pull A Fire Truck In FrontUnwilling To Believe It's Split DiopterShe's Definitely Not From House CleavageWorse Than Waking Up On A Plane To VegasKlingon Powerpoint Forensic AccountingYou Can't Turn A Hobby Into A Career...#GreatestGenThey Do The Dicommendation Thing!
TNG 315

Poster by J.J. LendL

Space Butthole

*When a butthole in space expels a version of the Enterprise from the past, the crew we've come to know are changed in ways no one can perceive - except for Guinan. In this alternate reality, the Klingons are eating the Federation for breakfast, and Captain Picard has to decide whether or not to send the visiting ship back to its own time. Could Worf be a "secret old"? Shouldn't Yar be due for a promotion by now? Is Ben's dog okay? It's the episode with no logic in it at all!*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Lt. Castillo**

For not caring that Yar has years of future experience over him when he becomes captain
Ben's pick is **Lt. Castillo**

For transparently wanting to die in battle with Yar
## Trading Cards

He's Gonna Have Some Warrior's ShitsA Slightly Older-Looking ModelCrazy, Blurring, Blending EffectRockin' The SlickbackSomeone Left Their Popcorn In The MicrowaveShooter McGavin Crawls OutStill Better Than That Guy On The Enterprise-BShit's Poppin' Off!"Dukes Of Hazzards" Over The HorseshoeLeave A Class-1 Butt Plug To Monitor The Situation
DS9 605

Morn wrapping a ribbon around his mother's birthday present.

*Sisko's tired of sleeping on the futons at Starbase Ben-Doesn't-Know-The-Number and he's ready to put Operation: Gettin' My Baseball Back into motion. Unlike the song, Odo's Mom ain't got it going on. PornHub lied to him!*

*With all "Full House" shows lost in the Eugenics Wars, Dukat has nothing to help him make up with Ziyal so he treats fatherhood like a call center and outsources to Damar. The Hooptie fleet rolls for DS9 with tailpipes dragging!*

## Show Bits

* Sabo
* Mornhammer
* Captain's Soup
* USS Hood

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Whip-pan**

For being a fun camera technique
Ben's pick is **Morn**

For trying to tie a ribbon with gloved hands
## Trading Cards

I'm Sick Of Retreat! I Want Us To Hold Power Cells Up To Our Boobs!I Know The Buckle Changed After Only One Episode. It Didn't Test WellThe Blocking Of Two Disappointed LoversThe Neckline Ends Above The Nipple. Not The Dress Of A Conjugal VisitZiyal: You're A Great Man! Dukat: No One Thinks That!Damar's Nationalism Pitch Fails Then He Gets McFlyedIt's Gonna Be Nice Not Hearing About You Being "The Emissary" All The Time!The Hood Would Not Be A Part To This!
DS9 213

*O'Brien and Bashir get called in to cut the red wire on a weight rack full on poison named after farm equipment. But when the swans get pissed at the geese and the mission goes fowl the boys have to get off the bus!*

*Miles gets the plague after not toweling off the weights before touching them. Then, he has to coach Julian though his Jr. Fair Electronics Exhibit. No wonder he doesn't seem that disappointed when the killer poultry shows up.*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **The End of the Episode**

The fact that they just cut to Keiko gasping and cutting to the exterior of the ship
Ben's pick is **Sisko**

For his order at Quark's
## Trading Cards

Pippi Longstocking AliensThe Thing About Shake Weights Is You Only Need OneThey Aren't Swan Level Assholes But They Are CloseJim Never Has A Second Cup Of Coffee At Home"You Gotta Be Fucking Kidding Me" FaceWe Lysol Everything And Everyone!RSVP Backpack RunaboutThere Is No Fucking Way They Just Ended The Episode Like This!
DIS 213

Poster by J.J. LendL

*Contreland's coming to Kruge the Sphere data from Discovery's memory banks. With System Restore not an option, Pike orders the ship to be Star Trek 3'd but Disco does not concur and revokes his Administrator status.*

*New plan! The crew will MacGyver a new Red Angel suit from spare appliances so Burnham can tugboat the Discovery into the future. It's Section (nearly) 31 vs. Discovery, the Entrepreneur & the most Previas you've ever seen!*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Rando Starfleet**

For taking a potted plant while evacuating
Ben's pick is **Saru**

For trying to cover his ass after failing in front of his co-workers
## Trading Cards

Are They All Like Legos? Perfectly Interoperable?Insert Dog Penises HereIt Does Not! Something Wrong!Why Not Take A Nova Super? You Were Willing To Destroy Qo'Nos, Bob!It Looks Like It Should Be WetI Never Watched "The Office"Pike Knew! The Whole Time!Do "To Be Continued"!!! Come On!
DS9 625

*The Little D gets a very, very long-distance distress call from a Starfleet captain marooned on planet with not enough air to survive but plenty to use on self-help seminars. Quark uses Odo's fakeaversary to cover a deal.*

*Forget Cusak. It's the Sisko-Yates situation that's really in distress. While Sisko digs a hole deeper than the one Cusak is hiding in Odo ponders whether to give Quark the present of dereliction of duty.*

## Show Bits

* For Some Reason Jake
* Julian Bashir: Piss Freak
* Star Trek Caves
* This Old Starship

## P1 Messages

To Ben and Adam

Scarves As Currency
To Ben and Adam

This Old Starship
## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **@07:54 extra**

for not being in costume
Ben's pick is **@01:16 Jem'Hadar**

Jem'Hadar being a civilian
## Trading Cards

What Are You Doing Just Walking Around Jem'Hadar!!!!!!!Captain Cusak Is Signaling She's Been Working On Some Standup And Can She Workshop It With Us?She's A Friend Who Doesn't Know How To Get Off The PhoneA Pandora Necklace?That Moment You Realize The Mistake You're Going To Have To Correct For LaterIt's A Grundlepod!She's Way Deader Than They Thought She Was Gonna BeThis Is Not An Open Torpedo Irish Wake
TNG 303

Husnock warship in orbit of Rana IV.

Kevin Uxbridge

*When the Enterprise discovers the aftermath of an attack on a planetary colony, they become suspicious of the two elderly survivors shacked up in the nicest house on their block. These survivors also seem unusually obsessed with their landscaping, which catches Commander Riker off-guard. But when Counselor Troi gets a bad song stuck in her head, the crew starts to wonder if there's something sinister going on inside their Malibu home. How many scarves is a reputation worth? Is there such thing as a lethal amount of guile? Why won't Captain Picard tell anyone what he's thinking? It's the episode where we play ALL the music.*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Redshirt**

For some unphysical space work during a space battle
Ben's pick is **Rishon Uxbridge**

For lack of concern about how she survived an attack that killed everything else on her planet
## Trading Cards

Beaming Down To MalibuKevin Is Strapped!Listening To The Stupid, Fucking Ice Cream TruckA Warrior's TeaOverplays How He Gets KilledKind Of A "Real Doll"Me Another Unbeatably Powerful AlienGoing For A Boob?
DIS 105

Poster by J.J. LendL

Black Toothbrush

*Lorca is jumped by the Klingons & imprisoned on the I.K.S. Kinkster with everyone's favorite human trafficker. The jump to reach him turns Disco's water bear into space jerky. Oral-B corners the nerd market with a color choice.*

## Drunk Shimoda

Daily Double! **Lt. Stamets**

For lying to the captain that he'll hurt the tardigrade in front of his boyfriend
## Trading Cards

"First Contact" Dream Style Boob StabbingAccording To Ben's Friend This Will Get You Out Of VietnamMudd? Sorry. I Skip Every Opportunity To Watch TOSLosing Your Eye Stabber Is A Small Problem In You Big PictureThe Waterbear Is Not In Good ShapeThat Loaf Burn Is Gonna Need Extra Breadcrumbs And Four Egg YolksWhy Is This Selfish Asshole In The Booth?What The Fuck Is That About?!?!?
DS9 325

Poster by J.J. LendL

The Blue Beverage Of Subtext

*Nog is slaving in the arcade to Alex Rogan his way into the academy but instead of the Ko-Dan it's Quark that's out to get him. Dax signs everyone up for a reverse exorcism so she can talk to herself...literally!*

*Odo is down with Slug Life and decides to let Curzon's ghost show him how to check things off his Out of the Bucket List. Dax thinks, "If he leaves me now he'll take away the biggest part of me" and has to tell Odo, "Baby, please don't go!"*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **The art director**

For making a sculpture of a dong going through a hole
Ben's pick is **Sisko**

For his stunt guy looking nothing like him
## Trading Cards

Are You In There Playing "Gauges"?You're Not Supposed To Do This In PublicThe First Take Was So Creepy They Couldn't Use It!Cure...And WrongWe Gotta Meet Curzodo!Drinking The Orange Drink Of Body ConfusionThis Was One Take!There Is Layered Embarrassment
DS9 426

Poster by J.J. LendL

Mr. BucketJulian Bashir: Piss Freak

*A Bajoran Blanche Devereaux wants to test Odo's liquid to solid response time but he comes down with a bad case of Changeling ED. With apparently no buckets left on DS9, everyone piles in the Defiant to look for some G Quad Cialis.*

*Garak learns all is not forgiven after the attempted "nuke 'em from orbit" plan. Odo has a more than 4 hour problem after going Modern English with ChangeLeader. Goopy Gowron is ready to Crimea river over some contested anis.*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Starfleet Security in the sixsbay**

For nodding at Odo and leaving the room after the Jem'Hadar
Ben's pick is **Bashir**

His attitude saying "Thank you" to the Female Changeling
## Trading Cards

She's Heard He Can Change The Size And Shape Of His DongClearly Having Trouble Holding It TogetherNothing To See Here! Just A Goopy Man Walking To A SpaceshipWas He Grabbing Him By The Chest Hair?I'm Looking At A Dead Fucking Phone, Garak!Bashir Wants To Get Some Of The Splash On HimHe's Got A Crank That Stays One Size Unless....Gowron's Gold! We're Going To War! This Is CNN!
DIS 108

Poster by J.J. LendL

Admiral Bob

*Discovery heads to planet State Park to figure out how to use its Wi-Fauna router to pick up Klingon cloaks. The local spores give Saru some fear Botox and he wants Burnham and Tyler to go full Pahvo Bush People.*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Saru**

Because his 'convinced' state resembles the original Shimoda in completely going along with the Pahvo
Ben's pick is **Saru**

For looking crazy while he runs (in sped-up footage)
## Trading Cards

Well, No Reason To Be Here Anymore. Bug Out!Do We Only Have One After Effects Filter? 'Cause You Look Like SporesSticking His Dog Penises Into Intelligent Clouds Of Snot. Some First Contact!That's A Torture Bag!Hand Over Our Communicators? Sure. We Trust You Completely. Like Idiots!Not Play FightingAll Her Friends Are In The Body RoomHe Two-Fisted Kirk Fights The Equipment
DS9 521

LeVar Burton directing

*Martok gets a loaner Bird of Prey to rescue a D7 that's been jumped and asks Worf to get his Riker on for the trip. But the ship's win record is Cleveland Browns bad and it looks like Martok's got a case of the yips.*

*Things look bad on the I.K.S. Down Periscope. The crew's honor interuptus boils over when Martok won't go below the hard deck to rescue survivors. Worf checks the Klingon HR manual. It has one page that says "Kill Captain."*

## Show Bits

* Eyes to Commercial
* Olds
* K urn

## P1 Messages

To all FODs

To Ben and Adam

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Sisko**

For his detachment to Worf in his office
Ben's pick is **Klingon Deployment**

For giving a broken ship to a broken general
## Trading Cards

How Am I Supposed To Get Your Blood Out Of Cardassian Carpet?Fine. Just Go. I'm Trying To ReadMy Mom Knew Curzon Dax. My Mom Was A Slut. You Think...?Yeah! I'ma Put On That Record Of Honor, Dawg!There's No Way That Beard Isn't Crispy With GaghCardassians Don't Even Need All These Neckbones!Circle Gets A Square! That's The Tova'Dok At Work!Now Who Remembers The House Of Mogh? It Ain't Kurn!
## Transcript

Official Maxfun Transcript
DS9 116

fireball in lower pylon one

Bit Origin: Fuck BokaiMornhammer
O'Brien hates his family

*This is what we get when aliens look to the wrong humans for lessons in imagination. Where's Riker and one of his consent-filled holodeck sessions when we need him?*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Kira**

For her expression describing "space oscillations"
Ben's pick is **Kira**

For taking her time during the revelation that what she sees on the screen isn't fully correct
## Trading Cards

Were you going to say "Fuck" Bokai?I Don't Know What You Call It Outside A Casino When It's BlueGot The Fuck To Sleep!"No" Means "No" Julian. And "Yes" Means "Yes"Why Are We Doing This?An Historic Amount Of Butt And UnderboobSurprisingly Not Willing To Give Up KeikoSisko's Office Is So Much Bigger Than Picard'sHaven't You Seen "Imaginary Friend?"
JL Pipes

"JL Pipes" is the nickname for Captain Picard in reference to his beefy, manly, muscled, bold, and assured presence the few fortunate times TNG viewers are treated to a shirtless or even just sleeveless P-Stew. The "pipes" are his arms. His rippled, oily, throbbing arms. Robust, strapping, toned and turgid. Yes, indeed. JL Pipes.
Convention Question Guy

"Hi, I have a question. Your podcast purports to be mostly dick and fart jokes, but I noticed you sometimes have serious questions about Star Trek."

When Adam and Ben raise questions about the Star Trek timeline, lore, or other nerdy Star Trek trivia, they do an impression of a pedantic sci-fi convention attendee asking the question at a panel discussion.
DS9 619

Poster by J.J. LendL

*The Dominion is giving the Federation Clubber Lang style beatings. The only way out Sisko sees is to bring the Breadboxes into the fight. But how can he get past the "we're pals" pinkie swear between them and the Dominion?*

*The jig is up! The news is out! The Roms found out about him! Ben's gone renegade! His rod's a fake! He'll have to fight on without them! Nothin' more for Ben to say. Did the Federation end today? He's a busted man!*

## Opening Segment

```
*REDACTED*

```

## Show Bits

* Eyes to Commercial
* Bread Box
* K urn
* Honeysticks
* Julian Bashir: Piss Freak
* The Blue Beverage Of Subtext
* Conferences are Dangerous
* Episode Vetoes
* Un-adjective X-Men

## P1 Messages

I can live with it

Happy Anniversary

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Vreenak**

Line reading of "It's a faaake!"
Ben's pick is **Sisko**

For placing the camera downrange of his acting
## Trading Cards

You've Run This "Bring The Romulans Into The War" Plan Up The Starfleet Flagpole, Right?Definitely A White Collar CriminalIt's Just A Flesh Wound. To The Chest!Is That Tuvix's Uniform?Captain, You're Asking For The Best Lube In The Galaxy. Letting Anyone Fuck That Smooth Is In Not In Everyone's Best InterestWhat Do You Think Of Data Rod V.17 Final Final Final Last One.Mov?It's Amazing It's Late Season 6 Before We See DS9's Shuttlebay!Vreenak Does Not Believe It To Be True. Well...Back To Work
McLaughlin Group

A reference to the long-running PBS news roundtable series *The McLaughlin Group*, Adam and Ben typically use this reference to describe any large decision-making crew meetings which take place on the show. This reference is always accompanied by the cranky voice of John McLaughlin announcing the first issue ("Issue one") of the program . On occasions where the crew has a second meeting or brainstorming session, McLaughlin more measuredly announces the second issue.

It was particularly apt when introduced in reference to The Child (S2E01) [Ep. 26 Worf Don't Preach] when a group of mostly male characters discuss how Counselor Troi's alien pregnancy should be handled--without much interest in her input.

Many viewers, unfamiliar with the television program, often thought that the sound drop here was someone yelling, "IF YOU WANT".
DS9 425

Poster by J.J. LendL

First episode using the 2019 logoMornhammer

*Kira gets karmic payback for blowing up Brian Keith's pizza oven when the O'Briens' bun is transported into her oven to save it. On the flip, Quark's caught a case of terminal dork and the Buy It Now for his death pucks goes to Brunt!*

*Quark's not dying but he's still pucked as he's worth more dead than alive. He comes up with a Dabney Coleman "Short Time" solution. It tanks & he loses all but the station has a "Cheers is burning" moment to save their favorite felon.*

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Garak**

Strengthening the crotch of Morn's pants (for his big dick)
Ben's pick is **Sisko**

Doing bits in the shuttle accident debrief
## Trading Cards

Is This Our Artwork Henchforth?Went Home. Saw Mom. Cut Deals. Got Dorks SyndromeFeeling Awkward About The Kira ContainerI'm Gonna Do Some Sick Shit With Those PucksI've Strengthened The Crotch To Carry "The Hammer"Quark's In A Terrible HeadspaceYou Can't Take Your Eyes Off The Walleyed HeadboobsBailing Out The Man Who Has Sold Out The Station Numerous Times
DS9 707

Ezri and Kira bond over mandatory screen time.

*Turns out Dahar work is hard to find these days so Kor asks Worf to use his KLinkedIn contacts to find him a spot in the fleet. Worf asks Martok for a set up but Martok has a mek'let to grind with Kor!*

*When Martok & Worf go down & Kor starts shouting TOS orders it's clear being Kling-old is the least of his problems. But when a Sto'Vo'Kor or bust move will save the fleet Kor shows an old dog can handle a few ticks!*

## Show Bits

* Eyes to Commercial
* Bangers
* Girders
* For Some Reason Jake

## Drunk Shimoda

Adam's pick is **Darok**

for bringing blood wine to the bridge on speculation
Ben's pick is **Darok**

for not going on the last stand mission
## Trading Cards

He's Amazed How Easily Kor Opened That DoorYour Name Is Too Much Like "Derek," Darok!He's Often Asked To Walk In A Hallway And Absorb What HappenedThe Crew Wanting To Suck Kor's Gagh Has Martok In A Warrior's PoutThey're Going To Be Fine. No Girders Have Dropped!Check Out Jake. You Kind Of Think He's Drunk!Kill Worf??? No. It Was Always Going To Be Kor!Martok Doesn't Sing. He Takes His Adam-Like Grudge To The Grave
Admiral Belt Buckle

Admiral Belt Buckle and Captain Sisko

## Pod Apperances

Special:WhatLinksHere/Admiral Belt Buckle

Admiral "Belt Buckle" is the nickname given to Vice Admiral William Ross after his uniform was updated to include a giant belt buckle in DS9 S6E04 Behind the lines and provided the show title for the related episode of pod.