Rap

**Rap** is the 14th Sodor Short.

## Lyrics

**Diesel: So finally our rivalry has come to this.**

**Diesel: Better brace yourself, Duck, for a mighty dis!**

**Diesel: I can tell you right now.**

**Diesel: You’ll come unstuck.**

**Diesel: You’ll fall to pieces...**

**Diesel:...Like a certain truck!**

**Diesel: What kind of an engine prefer to go by the name of a bird?**

**Diesel: That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard!**

**Diesel: How do like that!**

**Diesel: A few short lines and I own this rap.**

**Diesel: You might as well just...shut...your...trap!**

**Duck: I'll do no such thing!**

**Duck: I'll happily sing!**

**Duck: Don‘t get me yet you big black weasel.**

**Duck: My spirits soaring higher than evil kneivel!**

**Duck: You mock me for my name?**

**Duck: That's so lame!**

**Duck: At least I have one.**

**Duck: Nay, I have two:**

**Duck: Duck and Montague.**

**Duck: Yes, I much rather the former for they say I waddle.**

**Duck: That's so much better than being known as pure trouble!**

**Diesel: Oh, yeah?**

**Diesel: Then let's kick this in gear.**

**Diesel: I've had to suffer you year after year!**

**Diesel: You prance about Sodor like you own the place.**

**Diesel: Always gettin' up in an engine's space.**

**Diesel: "Great Western" this.**

**Diesel: "Great Western" that.**

**Diesel: Just shut it already you Great Western prat!**

**Duck: I'm proud to be Great Western and rightly so.**

**Duck: Ours is a legacy that's hardly hollow.**

**Duck: Gold and green for all to see.**

**Duck: The show's become a hit thanks largely to me.**

**Duck: I pull in the crowds.**

**Duck: You scare them away.**

**Duck: For no one cares about an engine built by British Railways!**

**Diesel: Too bad for you the BR didn't agree.**

**Diesel: That's why they built 996 of me!**

**Diesel: The most ubiquitous class in railway history.**

**Diesel: Hardly surprising. We are revo lution ary!**

**Duck: Oh. If you're revo-thing-a-gummy...**

**Duck: You know what? It's quicker to say, "Your a dummy!"**

**Duck: "Fetch some trucks." That's what I said.**

**Duck: You decided to get them caught in the trackbed!**

**Duck: Backwards and forwards you bumped them so hard.**

**Duck: Then came a song that echoed through the yard:**

**Trucks: Trucks are waiting in the yard,**

**Trucks: Tackling them with ease'll.**

**Trucks: "Show the world what I can do."**

**Trucks: Gaily boasts the Diesel.**

**Trucks: In and out he creeps about,**

**Trucks: like a big black weasel.**

**Trucks: When he pulls the wrong trucks out--Pop goes the Diesel!**

**Diesel: It's all your fault. You made them laugh at me!**

**Diesel: But I guess I should thank you for this infamy.**

**Diesel: It's such a joy to be known as Sodor's original bad boy.**

**Diesel: The one who got you sent away seemingly inside of a day.**

**Diesel: On Edward's branch line, you tried to be brave.**

**Diesel: Did I here someone say "A Close Shave"?**

**Duck: You sent me away because you were envious.**

**Duck: No wonder your name begins with "devious".**

**Duck: Lest we forget your plot was exposed.**

**Duck: Then Sir Topham told you to hit the road.**

**Duck: That he invited you back is completely insane.**

**Duck: Oh, what a surprise. "Diesel Does It Again"!**

**Duck: You were rude to Percy. You were rude to me.**

**Duck: China clay in the sea? Oh, what irony!**

**Diesel: Your relevance is over. Someone should've told ya.**

**Diesel: You no longer forward the plot.**

**Diesel: More often than not.**

**Diesel: You cause it to stop.**

**Diesel: Shameless fan service, that's what you've become.**

**Diesel: They'll write you out of the show before it's done.**

**Diesel: Seriously. What would it matter if they sent you packing?**

**Diesel: Everyone would probably say, "Oh that's just smashing!"**

**Duck: Beg pardon, Diesel but I think you're wrong.**

**Duck: Mine is a fanbase many million strong.**

**Duck: I may be numbered eight, but to them I'm number one.**

**Duck: What's your digit again? Oh, that's right. It's less than none.**

**Duck: I'm done wasting my breath. I've nothing more to say. Except you've been owned**

**Duck: the Great Western WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!**

## Characters

* Duck
* Diesel
* Henry *(does not speak)*
* Gordon *(does not speak)*
* James *(does not speak)*
* Donald and Douglas *(do not speak)*
* Thomas *(cameo)*
* Toby *(cameo)*
* Sidney *(cameo)*
* Arry or Bert *(cameo)*
* Splatter *(cameo)*
* Paxton *(cameo)*
* Iris *(cameo)*

## Trivia

* This episode is based on the channel "Epic Rap Battles of History".
* Terrier55Stepney also made a video about Epic Rap Battles of Railways.