Fake TPOT 43: Ten Is Enough

Warning! This page may contain **spoilers** of a popular video.
"**Ten Is Enough**" is the non-canon forty-third episode of *TPOT* by Jacknjellify. It was released on 4 June 1988. This episode is only headcanon to me, that is, until the real TPOT 2 comes out, after which it splits from the rest of the series to become an alternate universe. During the creation process, this episode was known as "**The Power of Multiplying**", "**Seven Against Two**", "**Pointless Point Searchers**" and "**Looking for Freedom**". (It was a very long creation process.)

Author's note: I guess we're talking about real life, but happy one-year anniversary of "You Know Those Buttons Don't Do Anything, Right?". Hard to believe it's been two years since the script for this pilot episode was written.

Author's note #2: Yeah, this act is turning into *Pencil 2.O*, but modified for the late '80s. Mwahaha!

Description if this were on YouTube:

Guess who's returned? All your friends from THE POWER OF TWO who know you on a spiritual level and have appeared in previous episodes, along with a few new people you may have seen before, maybe even in a past life or something! Let's hope that's enough to compensate for the loss of a certain someone.

Previous episode: "The Password Is *Family*"

Next episode: "Cherries & CAT Scans"

## Cold open

### **Two's Watchtower**

**Scene**Night. View of the watchtower (which has never been seen before) on the roof of Flat 10, where the unmerged host Two lives—since the announcement they made to the janitor of Spinalonga Studios in the last episode, we now know that Five is no longer going with them. Dramatic, brooding music plays, not unlike that of a suspense film. View inside the watchtower, where **Two** sits in front of a very futuristic screen (read: a touchscreen) and looks through the security cameras at some of the still-in contestants (as well as eliminated contestants and other Nixefta) returning to the Fovitwe after the break that began in 1987.
* **Two**: [*somewhat bitterly*] Look at all of them entering... with their lives outside the set and people to take care of them, not to mention those whom they can take care of. It all gives me a sense of... "enter-y-ness".

[*Two takes a sip of their coffee mug and does a spit-take, leading to the intro of the new, final act of* Fake TPOT. *The theme, titled "Modern", is basically the same as the previous intros, except instrumentation has been adapted to the style of the late 1980s: with more synthesized* *instruments than before and a heavy* *drum beat with a lot of reverb.*]

## Opening

### **Two's Watchtower**

**Scene**Continuation of the last scene.
* **Two**: [*nemini loquitur*] Why, there's but one thing I should like to say about this, and I'd like to say it well: You'll rue this day! That's what I'd say if I were in the presence of...
* **B****o****k**: Eh-em.

[*Two turns around and sees* **Bok** *meekly standing behind them. She is holding an envelope.*]

* **B****o****k**: Hey, Two.
* **Two**: Ah! Bok, you scared me!
* **B****o****k**: Sorry, but I found this letter on the ground. Also, I just wanted to say hello on behalf of everyone.
* **Two**: What do you mean, on be-*half* of everyone? Was that a maths joke?
* **B****o****k**: No... you see, everyone's coming back for the show. Not because you made them, but because you're the greatest host we've ever had, and, and that's not just my opinion; the whole cast says so, that... you're the greatest host we've ever had.
* **Two**: Thanks, Bok, but... I know when somebody sucks up when they don't really mean it. This isn't because you think I'm sad that Five's left me, is it?
* **B****o****k**: Well... it is.
* **Two**: Uh-huh.
* **B****o****k**: Saw made me do it! She said we wouldn't have to pay as much rent if I buttered you up!
* **G****at****y**: [*behind the door*] Gosh dang it, Bok!
* **Two**: Untrue.

[*Two gets up.*]

* **Two**: Listen, nothing nice has been said or done to me for months since I was cooped up here—I couldn't bear to go to the Equation Playground, you know, where... [*whispers*] *he* is.
* **B****o****k**: You mean Five.
* **Two**: Ah, don't say his name!
* **B****o****k**: So... are we going to start Cake at Stake soon?
* **Two**: Sure, just give me five—*six!* Six minutes.

[**Bok** *gives Two a sad smile before exiting.*]

### **Fovitwe Car Park**

**Scene**As soon as the next line of limousines appears near the now-completed car park of the Fovitwe, dozens of contestants start to pour out to return to their temporary homes on the set. Among them are **Stapy**, **Liy** and **Foldy**, who go off in different directions, disgruntled.
* **St****a****py**: Goodbye.
* **F****old****y**: Yeah, goodbye.
* **Li****y**: Adjö. [*Beat.*] What, you think I'm going to use the same words as you?

[*Liy shakes her head and walks towards* **Pin**.]

* **Li****y**: Pin, hi!
* **P****i****n**: Hello, Liy. You alright?
* **Li****y**: To tell the truth... not really. As they say where I was for the break, *je ne vais pas bien.*
* **P****i****n**: Were you in France or some ex-French colony? Ooh, were you in New Caledonia?
* **Li****y**: Don't want to talk about it. [*sigh*]
* **P****i****n**: I knew that sounded insensitive, I'm sorry. It's just that it's been in the news for a while, and I just... Oh, enough about me, how are you?
* **Li****y**: I could have spent the whole break in Sweden, where there'd be a prison cell with my last name on it, but they insisted that I go with them to therapy and talk about things that happened over twenty years ago. Foldy found out about the torrid affair Stapy and I had with each other and refuses to say anything that's not angsty or poetic—anyway, I think I've said too much; what are you in for? Waiting for someone?
* **P****i****n**: Oh. Yeah. Coiny's getting our kids' stuff from the car. They're staying with us for the act.
* **Li****y**: Kids. That's one thing I'd like to be around now. /s [*shudders*] I- I'll catch up with you later, okay?
* **P****i****n**: You're not a contestant any more, but...

[*Exit* **Liy**.]

* **P****i****n**: Okay.

### **Outside Flat 2**

**Scene****Liy** continues to walk alone. She finds **Pencil** and **Pen** standing by their flat, with their backs to her. Liy gasps.
* **Li****y**: Hey!
* **P****en**: Hi!
* **P****e****nci****l**: Wotcher, Liy.

[*Pen and Pencil turn to greet their friend. The latter looks like she is holding a large slab of ham or turkey.*]

* **Li****y**: Oooh.
* **P****e****nci****l**: Aye, I see you haven't met the new addition to our family.
* **Li****y**: You've adopted some meat from that new Two-themed supermarket?
* **P****en**: Haha, that's what I said it would look like from where you're standing!

[*Pencil rolls her eyes and reveals what she is holding in her arms: her and Pen's new baby son,* **Soniri***. In humanaho, she would be breastfeeding him; in object... aho... she obviously wouldn't be.*]

* **Li****y**: Whoa, it's a little millennial!
* **P****e****nci****l**: Adorable, innit? His name's Soniri.

[*Close-up of Soniri: He looks like a disembodied piece of pencil lead with purple ink on him. More specifically, he looks like "Pencil & Pen's Baby" from BFDI 20. Even more specifically than that, he looks exactly like Cil from* Pencil 2.O.]

* **Li****y**: Yeah, he looks real nice.
* **P****en**: Takes after his mother.
* **P****e****nci****l**: No, he takes after his father. The only difference is that he knows when to be quiet.
* **Li****y**: He takes after *both* of you. Herregud, here I was refusing to talk about kids after my Franco-therapy incident, but when I look at your little child I suddenly appreciate life more than I do death. Skål for the new parents!

[*Exit* **Liy**, *skipping.*]

* **P****e****nci****l**: I haven't seen Liy that happy since she found out about the EXIT door.
* **P****en**: Well, *I* haven't seen Liy that happy since she—
* **P****e****nci****l**: Don't finish that sentence.
* **P****en**: Wouldn't dream of it, heheh.

[*Soniri giggles.*]

* **[** **P****e****nci****l** · **P****en** **]**: Awwww!
* **P****e****nci****l**: [*sighs*] Is there anything more beautiful than a child's laughter?
* **P****en**: Yeah. Me.

[*Pencil laughs. Enter* **Match** *and* **Eraser**, *carrying bags of groceries. They look tired.*]

* **Ma****tch**: Is he sleeping?
* **P****e****nci****l**: No, he's just doing nothing.
* **Eraser**: That's what babies normally do.
* **Ma****tch**: I was talking about, like, *that* one. [*points at Pen (on his YeFone)*] You. Why aren't you, like, helping?
* **P****e****nci****l**: Aye, Pen, why aren't you helping?
* **P****en**: I am too helping; I finally set the little guy up with an Indus-Gram. See?

[*Pen shows the others his phone screen, featuring an empty Indus-Gram page with nothing but the "handle"* **PencilAndPensBaby** *on it*.]

* **[** **Ma****tch** · **P****e****nci****l** **]**: **[** Nice! · Oh, come on! **]**

## Pre–Cake at Stake

### **Crescentia Tepe**

**Scene****Two** stands near the statue in the middle of the Fovitwe and bangs on a gong repeatedly to get everyone's attention.
* **Two**: ***HEY-O, HEY-O, ALL YOU IN CONTESTANTS! HEY-O, HEY-O, ALL REPORT HERE!***

[*Enter all still-in contestants. Cross-talk.*]

* **R****e****m****ot****e**: What's all the rush, Two?
* **Co****i****ny**: Yeah, and why bang a gong when no one's getting on?
* **P****e****nci****l**: And you've interrupted our first dinner together. Our child is currently in the hands of Match!
* **Golf Ball**: In that case, people, memorize your emergency numbers!
* **Two**: A private dinner like the one you're having can wait, because it's time for the first Cake at Stake of the final act of... *The Power of Two!*

[*All gasp.*]

* **Two**: We shall meet right here.
* **R****e****m****ot****e**: But Two, who's going to be eliminated? I hope it's not Black Hole.
* **Two**: I see. That's right. A certain person was in charge of telling me who exactly was up for elimination, but since they're not here, I guess I'll have to do it by myself.
* **P****en**: Don't worry, Two, you got this! Bet you're a much better game show host than I was, eh? [*nudges them*]
* **Two**: [*Aside.*] That's a rather small hill to climb. [*Aloud.*] Roll tape!

## Cake at Stake

[*The new Cake at Stake theme plays. Not really "new", mind you—this is the exact same Cake at Stake theme that was used in the later episodes of BFDI.*]

**Act VIII Cake at Stake theme**

**Vocalist(s)**: Unknown voice (Michael Huang)

[*Choral song with orchestral background.*]

**?**: ♫ The points are gone;

We are free of them now,

But we look on

To the moment that we see

The next slice of cake—

A step closer to the prize—

Brought on by Cake at Stake. ♫

### **Crescentia Tepe**

**Scene****Two** has gathered the still-in contestants for Cake at Stake. Of those, the contestants up for elimination (**Black Hole**, **Golf Ball** and **Tennis Ball**) are seated on the platforms, while the others (**Bok**, **Coiny**, **Pen**, **Pencil** and **Pin**) are sitting on the Afos together.
* **Two**: [*pacing around*] So! Cake at Stake... We received [*number*] votes. Some of you were up for elimination. Others were not. They are... they will receive cakes, which will come in the form of rulers.
* **Golf Ball**: Two, what the hell is going on here? You're sounding more nervous than you've ever been!
* **Two**: I'm sorr—no, I'm not going to apologize for that. It just so happens that I've forgotten what it's like to host a show all by myself. I haven't been this lonely since 1981.
* **Co****i****ny**: What happened in 1981?
* **P****e****nci****l**: The discovery of sea water, Coiny. /s
* **Two**: I miss him dearly, but as Shaking-spear once said, "The show must go on".
* **T****e****nnis Ba****l****l**: I don't think he ever said that.
* **Two**: [*ignoring him*] All of you declared safe in the last episode, you get rulers!

[*Two throws five green rulers at the contestants declared safe, who are all sitting on the Afos.*]

* **B****o****k**: Wow, these are really accurate. You can even see the little numbers in them!
* **Two**: That's right; these rulers measure to the nearest hundredth of a millimetre; that is, ten to the power of minus... minus... minus...
* **T****e****nnis Ba****l****l**: Uh-oh.

[*Two does not cry (as expected) but simply falls onto the Tec Pulcussar and makes a comical sound.*]

* **Two**: *Weeyonk!*
* **B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: [*surprised*] Two. Are you okay?
* **Golf Ball**: That's our old team name; we copyrighted it during the break!
* **B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: Come on, GB, I know you're retired, and have enough time to copyright a common phrase, but please have a heart. Our host has just fainted.
* **Golf Ball**: But—

[*Two gets up.*]

* **Two**: I'm fine. I'm really fine. [*sighs languorously*]
* **B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: Okay.
* **T****e****nnis Ba****l****l**: Well... aren't you going to tell us which two of us are safe and which one is eliminated?
* **Two**: Yes, that's an idea. Black Hole, you got the most votes with [*number*]. That number had two *5*'s in it. [*pouts*]
* **B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: Thank you.

[*Two flings a ruler into Black Hole, who accidentally sucks it up.*]

* **B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: Oh dear, it's Ramadan.

[*Spotlight effect on Golf Ball and Tennis Ball. All gasp.*]

* **Golf Ball**: This is it, TB. It's either you go or I do. [*sighs*]
* **Two**: Do I... [*Golf Ball looks at them.*] Never mind.
* **Golf Ball**: Go on.
* **Two**: I was going to say something snarky about your sudden burst of emotion, but... I don't have it in me today.
* **Golf Ball**: Good.
* **T****e****nnis Ba****l****l**: Golf Ball, the only thing I lose after today is the fact that one of us will have to pay rent for the rest of the show.
* **Golf Ball**: Well, that's fair enough for me. Reveal the votes, Two.
* **Two**: Okay. Safe at [*number*] votes and eliminated at [*number*] are, respectively...

[*Pause.*]

* **Two**: *Golf Ball*... and *Tennis Ball*.

[*Dramatic sting.*]

* **Two**: TB, you're eliminated. Please enter my hotel with the others and don't come out.
* **T****e****nnis Ba****l****l**: [*confused*] Hotel?
* **Two**: Sorry, I've been watching old episodes during the hiatus to remember how the whole "single host elimination thing" worked. But yeah, Tennis Ball, I'd rather you just... go. [*sighs languorously*]
* **T****e****nnis Ba****l****l**: Okay.

[*He gets up and walks off, before turning around.*]

* **T****e****nnis Ba****l****l**: Alright, everyone, it was nice competing with you, getting eliminated on account of demonic possession, coming back, competing and getting eliminated again.
* **Co****i****ny**: Pleasure working with you too, dude.
* **P****en**: Stay in touch, buddy!
* **T****e****nnis Ba****l****l**: Right. Goodbye, all.

[*Exit* **Tennis Ball** *to his flat. Golf Ball sighs.*]

* **R****e****m****ot****e**: BH, do you think he was sad when he got sent off?
* **B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: Hard to tell.

[*Suddenly, a long pipe comes out of Flat 7 and aims itself at where Golf Ball is sitting. She can hear Tennis Ball's whispering voice coming through it, though inaudible to everyone else.*]

* **T****e****nnis Ba****l****l**: *I will help you win.*
* **Golf Ball**: Ha, ha! [*looks at everyone*] Nothing.

## Post–Cake at Stake

### **Flat 2**

**Scene**In a sitcom-like transition, we get a view of **Pencil**, **Pen**, **Match** and **Eraser** in their flat—Pencil is holding **Soniri** in her arms and Eraser is playing pool by himself. **Bok** is with them, now a supposedly full-fledged member of the alliance, and feeling slightly out of place. She tosses the envelope in her hand.
* **P****e****nci****l**: So that's when Tennis Ball disappeared just like that. [*snaps her fingers*] At least he's got his kids.
* **Ma****tch**: And you've got, like, *your* kids. Kid, I mean.
* **P****e****nci****l**: Aye. I just hope nobody ever lets the little one out of their sight, or else we'd all be in trouble. [*looks at Pen*]
* **P****en**: What?
* **P****e****nci****l**: Nothing. I was just imagining your looking for our dear child when he's a metre away from you.
* **Eraser**: Yeah, that's believable.
* **P****en**: Y'know, the same thing happened the other day with my shades. They were on my cap the wh— w- hey! Are you saying I can't be trusted?
* **P****e****nci****l**: Maybe a little. If it makes you feel any better, my opinions change more quickly than the cast of *Fence-son*.

[*Bok suddenly laughs out loud.*]

* **B****o****k**: Aa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Aa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
* **P****e****nci****l**: What is it, Bok?
* **B****o****k**: Not to derail the talk or anything, but we had the most darling chat earlier, you know, my friends from my alliance and I, and we couldn't believe that you're a mother now, Pencil!
* **P****e****nci****l**: Well, believe it, Bok, 'cos it's true. I've been on this planet for several decades (one of which I spent at sea), and I've finally achieved what I thought was unachievable: I unweddedly had a kid with that one. [*points at Pen, who smiles at her*] Hahahaha!
* **Ma****tch**: Not that it's necessary to marry in order to have, like, children, Penc-penc. You're a liberated writing stick!
* **P****e****nci****l**: Of course, but... my parents must be glad to have another grandson in the family. Now Nels don't have to be the only one to care for two.
* **P****en**: Hey, but we earned it, Penc. [*puts his arm around her*] Dad's pretty happy too; Sonny's the only grandkid he's ever met, as a matter of fact.
* **Eraser**: Ey, I've fathered dozens of kids and I bet to them Ari's more than just a dead philosopher.

[*Bok awkwardly laughs.*]

* **B****o****k**: Ooh, ha-ha. Ha-ha. [*tosses the envelope up*]
* **P****en**: What's that? [*points at the envelope*]
* **P****e****nci****l**: That's Bok, Pen. We were friends in BFDIA, silently quarrelled for several years and got back together while you were shooting your pilot.
* **P****en**: I knew that! I was just talking about the envelope thingy she's got.
* **B****o****k**: Oh, this thingy? I kind of... stole it from Two's place.
* **P****e****nci****l**: Well, why'd you do something silly like that?
* **B****o****k**: They refused to open it when I said hello! I'm beginning to think it contains information about rent.
* **P****e****nci****l**: Or our next challenge?
* **B****o****k**: Or that. [*Pause.*] Nah, I don't think I should do it.
* **Ma****tch**: Why, like, why not?
* **B****o****k**: Because opening people's mail is wrong! And it's doubly wrong when it's meant for someone who can warp reality until it becomes poorly-written fiction. Pencil, you're the one that sets the alliance rules and can say who's wrong and who's right; what do you think of it?
* **P****e****nci****l**: I think you should open it.

[*Bok half-jokingly scoffs.*]

* **P****e****nci****l**: What?
* **B****o****k**: I'd better go somewhere else and see what the others think.

[*Exit* **Bok**. *Silence fills the room—Pencil and Pen turn around to see Match and Eraser making out on the pool table. Luckily, it's dark enough that we can only see their shadows.*]

* **P****en**: We're not like that, are we, Penc?
* **P****e****nci****l**: Not since the kid came along. [*Exeunt.*]

### **Flat 6**

**Scene****Bok** is now with **Remote** and **Black Hole** in their flat.
* **R****e****m****ot****e**: Don't open it.
* **B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: Yes, Bok, resist the temptation.
* **B****o****k**: Wow, finally, some sense around here!
* **R****e****m****ot****e**: I know. [*about Black Hole*] You should see how this guy decorates.

[*Bok puts the envelope down on the coffee table. Remote picks it up and looks at it.*]

* **B****o****k**: You know, I went to your friend Pen's flat earlier and everyone there wanted me to have a closer look at it. Being the law-abiding citizen whose chances of being eliminated are really high because of some of the things I did in the previous act, I told them not to, that it's a rotten thing to—
* **R****e****m****ot****e**: Done.

[*We see that Remote has zapped the top of the envelope off with her laser powers.*]

* **B****o****k**: [*slowly*] You opened the envelope you said you didn't want me to open?
* **R****e****m****ot****e**: I was tempted.
* **B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: Oh, Remote...

## Pre-contest

### **Outside**

**Scene****Two** and **Golf Ball** stand on the grass, away from the centre of the Fovitwe. Right next to them is the scoreboard from the previous act, which neither notice.
* **Golf Ball**: Two.
* **Two**: [*turns around, smiling*] Yes, Golf Ball?
* **Golf Ball**: Oh, you're happy.
* **Two**: I'm learning to live with it. Like that *STPOT* contestant said in the last episode—Leafy, was it?
* **Golf Ball**: Yes.
* **Two**: She said, "Life goes on."
* **Golf Ball**: Brah.

[*Beat. Two looks at Golf Ball, confused.*]

* **Golf Ball**: I have a quick inquiry.
* **Two**: Oh no.
* **Golf Ball**: Why was the Cake at Stake song "The Points Are Gone"?
* **Two**: Well...
* **Golf Ball**: I see no reason why a Cake at Stake song should begin with the words "the points are gone" unless the points are actually gone! Can you explain that, Two?
* **Two**: Sure, sure, yeah, whatever. Whoever said the points are gone really meant that...

[*Two turns towards the scoreboard. Golf Ball looks at it too. Two claps twice and the scoreboard disappears.*]

* **Two**: The points are gone.
* **Golf Ball**: Uh! Ò...
* **Two**: Listen, I haven't the time to talk about points and other things that existed when you-know-who was around; it's time to start the contest!
* **Golf Ball**: That's right, the contest! What is it, Two? If it's competitive arm wrestling, you can count me out.
* **Two**: No, no, it's...

[*Two looks down and makes a noise of shock.*]

* **Golf Ball**: What is it, Two?
* **Two**: My envelope! [*realizing*] And I think I know who it was.
* **Golf Ball**: Wait, Two, where are you going?

[*Hinc teleportat* **Two**. *Golf Ball looks around for a few seconds before walking away.*]

### **Flat 6**

**Scene****Black Hole**, **Bok** and **Remote** are talking.
* **R****e****m****ot****e**: So I've been thinking about some of Coiny's suggestions for our death prevention company.
* **B****o****k**: And you threw them out.
* **R****e****m****ot****e**: How can someone so committed to ecology set up a meat farm outside our pact headquarters?

[*All laugh. Huc teleportat* **Two**. *The three start to look away out of guilt.*]

* **Two**: Aha!
* **B****o****k**: Here, Two, have this. I don't want it any more.
* **Two**: By any chance did you read this?
* **B****o****k**: No, no, no. I may be a Bok, but I don't read. [*Beat.*] Things like this.
* **Two**: Brilliant. Well, how about we get everyone who's still in the game so I can tell them about the contest?
* **B****o****k**: So it *was* about the contest!

[*Two claps twice and the still-in contestants find themselves in Flat 6. Cross-talk.*]

* **Two**: Yes, yes, stifle, stifle. You're all here because it's time for me to announce today's challenge. All by myself.

[*Two begins to take the letter out of the envelope and unfold it.*]

* **P****en**: D'ya need any help?
* **Two**: No, thank you. I am perfectly capable of double-handedly announcing the... [*looks at the letter*] *graphic design contest? **WHAT?***

[*Soni exspectati.*]

* **P****e****nci****l**: A graphic design contest, no way!
* **Two**: [*reading the letter*] "Dear lucky contestants: An anonymous artist has just started working on a creative poster for the American Dance Festival this coming Saturday."
* **Co****i****ny**: ***HOW CREATIVE IS IT?***

[*Everyone looks at Coiny again.*]

* **Two**: I presume it's very creative, thank you for asking. [*goes back to reading*] "They need help finding two fonts for their poster to make it stand out from all the others. Your job, contestants, is to write down every letter of the alphabet and digit of the numerical system as specimens for a potential font. The creators of the two fonts chosen by this artist will receive immunity, while those whose fonts are not chosen will be up for elimination."

[*Silence, as pieces of paper—the same "Faith papers" that made their first appearance in episode 38—fall from the sky.*]

* **Two**: Well? What are you all standing around for? Go!

[*Exeunt omnes with their "Faith papers".*]

## Contest

### **Flat 2**

**Scene****Match** and **Eraser** are watching television in Pencil and Pen's flat. **Soniri** is with them, playing in his little baby holder.
* **Ma****tch**: [*not paying attention*] Babysitting... queen.
* **Eraser**: Yeah, you are the queen. Of babes. [*snorts*]

[*Match playfully pats Eraser on the head.*]

* **Eraser**: Ouuuuuuwwwwch!

[*Enter* **Pencil** *and* **Pen**.]

* **P****en**: Hi, guys!
* **Eraser**: How're things goin', dude?
* **P****en**: Not bad. Two said we have to draw every letter and number for the contest.

[*Pencil gasps and rushes over to Soniri.*]

* **P****e****nci****l**: What did you do to him?
* **Ma****tch**: Nothing, I, like, swear!
* **P****e****nci****l**: Well, that's the issue! Soniri can't have nothing done to him! Whenever we're not around, he needs to stay in his baby car seat instead of his holder! [*points at the car seat next to the baby holder*]
* **Eraser**: Oh. I did not see that before.
* **Ma****tch**: Why did you even, like, bring a car seat into the house?
* **P****e****nci****l**: Ask that one. [*looks at Pen*]
* **P****en**: I thought it would be funny if we could do "Sonny in chair" in our flat. Get it? [*giggles*]

[*Eraser falls asleep. He snores loudly.*]

* **P****e****nci****l**: Er, honey, why don't you go to Lawl-Mart and buy that high seat you ordered on that app?
* **P****en**: Okeydoke! I'll be right back.

[*Exit* **Pen**, *saluting.*]

* **Ma****tch**: Like, don't get lost!

[*Pencil, trying to keep a serious face, shows Match and Eraser her "Faith paper".*]

* **P****e****nci****l**: I'm going to need your help, you two. *Eraser!*
* **Eraser**: [*waking up*] This for the contest?
* **P****e****nci****l**: No, Eraser, it's for when I'm celebrity guest judge on *Planet Search*. /s

### **Flat 7**

**Scene****Tennis Ball** is reclining on the couch, while **Golf Ball** pulls out her "Faith paper"—it is large, though not as large as the one Pencil pulled out in the previous scene. Their children **Orpha** (including her husband **Chris Sr.** and their children **Chris Jr.**, **Amanda** and **Taniel**), **Colin** (including his wife **Starletha** and their son **Gaty Not Related**) and **Theola** (including her boyfriend George **Costello**, her border collie and her daughter who she thought was her sister **Trebekka**) loom in the background and look as though they are having a party.
* **Golf Ball**: Tennis Ball! If we want the most aesthetically pleasing font, we need the brain of an aesthetician.
* **T****e****nnis Ba****l****l**: Should we get out the MMR?
* **Th****e****ol****a**: [*overhearing*] Hey, hey, we love measles, mumps and rubella!

[*Cheers from the background.*]

* **Starletha**: I'm all for things I've never heard of!
* **Golf Ball**: Uck. TB, perhaps we should work on this in another apartment building. It is getting loud in here!
* **T****e****nnis Ba****l****l**: [*off-screen*] That won't be necessary, look!
* **Golf Ball**: What? Where?
* **T****e****nnis Ba****l****l**: Up here!

[*Golf Ball looks up and sees, to her surprise, Tennis Ball wearing his headset from BFB 13.*]

* **Golf Ball**: Oh. You're really into throwbacks these days, aren't you?
* **T****e****nnis Ba****l****l**: Not this time.
* **Golf Ball**: Anyway, we need to find someone who has an eye for good typographical design so that we, I mean, *I* can have a victory in this matter and be declared immune!
* **T****e****nnis Ba****l****l**: But who do we know has the best taste?
* **Golf Ball**: Judging by the way things look right now, I do.

### **Flat 6**

**Scene**View of 36 nicely-drawn letters and numbers drawn in front of a mirror, on a "Faith paper" held by **Remote**, who speaks to **Black Hole** off-screen.
* **R****e****m****ot****e**: It could use a bit more waves.
* **B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: I asked for your honest opinion, and you gave it. It's a good thing I was hardly trying with this one.

[*An alternative view: The mirror against which Remote was holding up the "Faith paper" is a funhouse mirror, installed by Black Hole in his flat as a trademark of his eclectic interior decorating style. This makes the letters and numbers on the paper look very wavy and distorted in the real world.*]

* **B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: Now, if only I had the same typeface reproduction skills that you have.

[*Black Hole picks up Remote's "Faith paper", which shows the entire set of letters and digits printed out as a contemporary monospaced font.*]

* **R****e****m****ot****e**: I'm sorry.
* **B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: Yeah. It's a good thing we're friends, right?
* **R****e****m****ot****e**: Yessiree.

[*Remote leans forward to embrace Black Hole, who instinctively backs away and accidentally sucks up his "Faith paper".*]

* **B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: Well, there was no loss there.
* **R****e****m****ot****e**: Do you think Two is cheap enough not to have bought a second sheet of paper?

### **Flat 2**

**Scene****Pencil** has enlisted **Match** and **Eraser** to help her with her part of the contest. Triumphant music plays as we see Pencil coaching her friends to work in a series of extreme close-ups of the paper being drawn on.
* **P****e****nci****l**: Make it smooth and good! And the corner, and the other corner! You got this! Whoop-de-doo, we did it! Nice going, gang!

[*Zoom out on the "Faith paper". We see that the only thing on it is the capital letter* A*, which appears in a serif font (as opposed to the typical sans-serif style Pencil normally writes with).*]

* **Ma****tch**: Wait, Penc-penc. This isn't you.
* **Eraser**: Yeah, you're acting like Pen.
* **P****e****nci****l**: Well, when you spend a whole break with him and practically nobody else, you start to collect his writing and speaking patterns.
* **Eraser**: Hear that, Match? She's slowly turning into you too.
* **Ma****tch**: Lovely, but I must warn you: no one does me better than I, like, do. Hey, let's, like, show this thing off to Pin!
* **P****e****nci****l**: Why her?
* **Ma****tch**: *Because*, like, it's, like, tradition for Pin and me to be, like, enemies. I may not be on this show any more, but I do know how to gloat.
* **Eraser**: Yeah, you do. [*points at her*] Pencoochie, I'm tellin' ya, when this girl starts gloating me, I never want her to stop.
* **Ma****tch**: Eraser, *gloat* means to brag at the expense of, like, others.
* **P****e****nci****l**: Did you just call me Pencoochie?

[*Beat.*]

* **Eraser**: Oh.

### **Flat 3**

**Scene****Pin** and **Coiny** are tidying up what they think is their joint "Faith paper". Unknowingly to them, they actually have two separate papers to work on, but the two sheets are too stuck on top of each other to notice.
* **Co****i****ny**: Ha-cha-cha, I've been writing and reciting the alphabet since I was born; that is, until Father taught me phonetics: *Charlie! Oscar! India! November! Yankee!*
* **P****i****n**: [*laughs and points at the paper*] Aw, no Vietnamese diacritics?
* **Co****i****ny**: It's an American dance festival they're making the poster for, honey.
* **P****i****n**: Fair enough. Hey, you two, come see this!
* **L****i****s****a**: [*off-screen*] Whaaat?
* **Co****i****ny**: You want to be proud of your ol' mom and pop, kids?
* **P****i****n**: He did something really pride-worthy!

[*Enter* **Lincoln** *and* **Lisa** *from their rooms, only partially looking up from their YeFones. As one would expect, the two of them look like mixes of Coiny and Pin.*]

* **L****i****s****a**: What, did he accidentally kiss Firey again?
* **P****i****n**: Nooo, look at this!
* **Lin****co****l****n**: Mom, Dad, we told you, we're not kids any more.
* **Co****i****ny**: Oh, come on!
* **L****i****s****a**: Yeah, I'm sixteen. I can practically drive a moving vehicle!
* **P****i****n**: Not in this country.
* **L****i****s****a**: Oh, why'd you move us here anyway? That's totally not rad!
* **Co****i****ny**: We had this conversation in the car, on the plane *and* in the limo that brought us here for that matter. Now who wants to see the alphabet?

[*Lincoln and Lisa silently crowd around the "Faith paper".*]

* **Lin****co****l****n**: As they say on that app... meh.

[*Exeunt.*]

* **P****i****n**: They're still adjusting.

[*Enter* **Pencil** *with* **Match** *and* **Eraser**.]

* **P****e****nci****l**: 'Ello, 'ello, 'ello!
* **Co****i****ny**: Hi, Pencil.
* **P****i****n**: What's up?
* **P****e****nci****l**: Oh, nothing. I just had an urge to show you our paper.
* **Ma****tch**: Check it out!

[*Pencil shows Coiny and Pin her giant letter* A.]

* **P****i****n**: A.
* **P****e****nci****l**: A is for *a victory*, which is what we're going to have when our font gets chosen for the Antiguan dance festival!
* **P****i****n**: It's the *American* festival.
* **Co****i****ny**: Yeah, how the heck could you possibly confuse the two?
* **P****e****nci****l**: I've... [*looks around awkwardly*] been acting strangely lately. [*snaps her finger in the air*] Please excuse us, apparently we're leaving.
* **Eraser**: Finally.
* **Ma****tch**: Okay, like, bye, Pin! I hate you!
* **P****i****n**: Hate you too!

[*Exeunt* **Pencil**, **Eraser** *and* **Match**, *who gives Pin the "wrong finger" out of jest—Pin laughs, to the bewilderment of Coiny. Enter* **Lincoln** *and* **Lisa**.]

* **Lin****co****l****n**: What did we miss?
* **Co****i****ny**: I don't know. [*looks at the camera, perhaps inadvertently*] Things have been pretty unusual around here.

### **Flat 6**

**Scene**With **Remote** and **Black Hole**.
* **R****e****m****ot****e**: You sure you're ready to do it again?
* **B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: Yes. These things do take a little long.

[*Black Hole picks up the magic writing utensil he must use on the "Faith paper" for his submission to the contest to be valid. He quickly draws all the letters and numbers on it, just as he did before.*]

* **B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: Done.
* **R****e****m****ot****e**: That fast, huh?
* **B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: For me it is. After all, I am limited only by the speed of light.

[*View of the "Faith paper" once again.*]

* **R****e****m****ot****e**: It's still kind of wobbly.
* **B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: There must be a word, for my condition, in which I am unable to write.
* **R****e****m****ot****e**: Illiteracy?
* **B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: No, that's when you can't write *or* read. Anyway, want to join me on the steps?
* **R****e****m****ot****e**: You bet.

[*Remote goes to the outside of the flat and sits down on the porch. Black Hole floats next to her.*]

* **B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: Okay.
* **R****e****m****ot****e**: Well, right here you can find peace and quiet.
* **B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: Yes. Absolute peace... and...

[**Pencil**, *apparently still mentally cosplaying as Pen, runs hurriedly across the Fovitwe (even though she'd only visited the flat next to hers). She is followed by* **Match** *and* **Eraser**.]

* **P****e****nci****l**: Oh chiz, oh chiz, oh chiz, oh chiz, oh chiz!
* **Ma****tch**: [*gesticulating wildly at Black Hole and Remote*] The *baby*, the *baby*, the *baby*, Remo-mo!

[*Eraser starts to run backwards.*]

* **Ma****tch**: Rase, where the frick do you think you're going?
* **Eraser**: I'm getting popcorn! I gotta see how this turns out!

[*An outstretched hand pulls* **Eraser** *in the right direction.*]

* **R****e****m****ot****e**: Sure. Peace and quiet.

### **Outside Flat 2**

**Scene**
* **Ma****tch**: Omg, I can't believe you've, like, forgotten about Sonny!
* **P****e****nci****l**: *Soniri!*
* **Eraser**: The longer we stand outside, the more likely it is that he's escaped. [*Beat.*] Huh-heh-heh. Hee-hee-hee.
* **P****e****nci****l**: What the hell are you laughing for?
* **Eraser**: I said something wise.
* **P****e****nci****l**: [*taking his and Match's hands*] Come on, you two.
* **Ma****tch**: Your son's not a bird, Penc-penc. I'm sure he's doing just, like, fine.

### **Inside Flat 2**

**Scene**Contrary to what Pencil thought earlier, **Soniri** is not alone. **Pen** (the father) is with him—he's just returned—he seems to have broken into song, belting out Cher's newest single (the fifth real-life song featured in the series) as it plays on EmptyTV. Of course, we don't see what's on the TV screen because this is a sitcom, but he's singing anyway.

**Song: "We All Sleep Alone"**

**Vocalist(s)**: Pen

**P****en**: ♫ *Don't make no promises that I can't keep,

I won't be no prisoner of somebody's needs—

You may have lovers, wherever you roam,

But sooner or later, ooh... we all...* ♫

[*As this happens, enter* **Pencil**, **Match** *and* **Eraser**, *shocked. They only catch Pen's attention at the very end, when Eraser does a single clap.*]

* **P****en**: Sleep alone.

[*Soniri giggles as Pen blushes and turns off the TV.*]

* **P****en**: Yeah, the shop wasn't open, so I came back in time to hear the door closing. Did you... enjoy the show?
* **P****e****nci****l**: Since this is you we're talking to, I can only say that I've never heard anything like that.
* **P****en**: Really? Thanks, honey! [*kisses her*] How 'bout you two?
* **Eraser**: I thought it was against the law to torture your children. No, you're fine, bro. [*slaps Pen on the back*]
* **P****en**: I'm sorry, but it really helps your kids' language development if you sing to 'em. Saw that in a TV commercial, as a matter of fact—remember, Penc, when we watched the Winter Games in *my* country?
* **P****e****nci****l**: Of course, how could I forget the games that were held in *your* country?
* **P****en**: Yep!
* **Eraser**: Pencil, no!
* **Ma****tch**: [*covering her* *ears*] It's a trick!
* **P****en**: This one's for you, Sonny! ♫ *O, Canada!* ♫

[*Exit* **Pen**, *singing patriotically. Pencil throws him a "Faith paper" from the door so he can make his submission to the contest.* **Coiny** *looks inside with* **Pin**.]

* **P****i****n**: Well, he's in a musical mood.
* **Co****i****ny**: I told you something weird was going on.

## End of the contest

### **Outside**

**Scene****Two** sits alone, sadly moaning to themselves.
* **Two**: Sad, sad. Moan, moan.

[*Enter* **Bok**, *carrying a piece of paper with letters and numbers on it. Her contribution is not on a "Faith paper"; rather it looks like something she had taken out of her own body.*]

* **B****o****k**: Moaning again, are you, Two?
* **Two**: No. [*turns around*] Oh, hello, Bok. That's not the kind of paper I especially specifically specified.
* **B****o****k**: I thought it would be a good idea for my paper with the glyph samples on it to, you know, be made of me. That way whoever we're designing the fonts for can, um, appreciate the personalization of it all.
* **Two**: Oh. In that case, congratulations. You're the first one to finish!
* **B****o****k**: Say, if I'm #1, would you mind if I sat down next to you and asked you what's going on?
* **Two**: Who knows? Who cares?
* **B****o****k**: Excuse me, but I do care. You've been upset all day.

[*Bok looks up at the sky.*]

* **B****o****k**: Er... night. Anyway, I want to help. So why don't you tell me what's up with you?
* **Two**: Are you a licenced psychiatrist?
* **B****o****k**: Am I a- Two, you never cared about that technical stuff, following the rules and things like that.
* **Two**: Yeah, but... *he* does!
* **B****o****k**: Wh- Oh. I see. I am sorry for mentioning it.
* **Two**: Why did he have to leave me? [*looks straight at Bok*] I was *abandoned* without any explanation and I want him back! Not as co-host, sure—I can understand if it has something to do with my hosting style, seeing as I've been absent for long stretches of the last act—but I just want him to be present, at least with a reason for his departure! Don't you agree, Bok?
* **B****o****k**: I'd be in danger of breaching the rules if I said anything else.
* **Two**: Why?
* **B****o****k**: Because they're here.

[*Two turns around to see all the still-in contestants standing around.*]

* **Co****i****ny**: Hi, Two!
* **P****e****nci****l**: You look like you need a squeeze! [*regrettably cringes*] Chiz, I thought I'd stopped that.
* **Two**: Thank you for the support, but... we'd really better get on with the contest. [*feigning a smile*] And in time, too, for here comes the judge!
* **R****e****m****ot****e**: Everybody knows that he is the judge.
* **Co****i****ny**: Peace, brotha!
* **R****e****m****ot****e**: [*looks at Coiny*] No.
* **Co****i****ny**: [*giggles*] Kidding.

[*A hooded* **figure** *that looks as if Five* *is underneath approaches the scene. They wear a cape over everything to conceal who they are, even though it is obvious to everyone (except Two) who it is. All gasp.*]

* **P****en**: Hey, it's, it's... oh, I'll be darned, I forgot his name! Hold up, I- I'll get it, just give me a minute!
* **Two**: Do be quiet, Pen. Sometimes you do say the silliest things.

[*The unknown figure begins to speak. They have almost the exact same cadence and vocabulary that Five would have after being isolated from Two for months,* *but their voice has been altered to sound like every other character except Five.*]

* **Figure**: Yes, it's me. I've been caught, not wholly, but partially. Can I have my font samples, please?
* **Two**: Sure, whoever you are! Contestants, please show our concealed guest your "Faith papers".

   [*Everyone takes their "Faith papers" out. The figure's eyes scan their "Faith papers" in their head before they land on Coiny and Pin, who are awkwardly holding their page together.*]

* **Figure**: Ò! Coiny and Pin!
* **P****i****n**: Yes?
* **Co****i****ny**: How do you know our names?
* **Figure**: I just do. Now to whom does this "Faith paper" belong?
* **P****i****n**: I thought that we were allowed to share—
* **Figure**: You're out!
* **Two**: Coiny and Pin, you are now up for elimination.
* **Co****i****ny**: What? But it looks so good! [*to the others*] Don't you think what we drew looks good?
* **Golf Ball**: We wish not to say anything that could influence the results.

[*Two walks over to look at Coiny and Pin's "Faith paper".*]

* **Two**: Since you signed *Coiny and Pin* on your "Faith paper", and since we know that neither of you wants to claim it for yourself, we had no choice but to disqualify you both from the contest. Be glad that there's no longer a point system in place, yeah?
* **Co****i****ny**: [*sigh*] Oh, alright.
* **Two**: So whose "Faith paper" must go next, whoever you are?
* **Figure**: We'll make it into an elimination-type thing.

[*All gasp.*]

* **Figure**: Oh, cut it out. No one's getting eliminated at the end of the episode. All the designers whose names I call first are put up for elimination, and the two font designers I eventually choose are immune!
* **Two**: Wow, you seem to know lots about how things work here.
* **Figure**: [*ignoring them*] It is now time for the judging, so if you're not Coiny or Pin, get your papers out!

[*Everyone stays where they are as they already have their posters out*—**Coiny** *and* **Pin** *move out of the way. The figure plays the elimination game, finding the font that is least suitable for their poster. They eventually decide on Remote's poster, at which they point. This pointing gesture, though made under a cloak, is perceived by Two, who thus announces who will be up for elimination.*]

* **Two**: Remote, you're out.
* **R****e****m****ot****e**: Darn.

[*As the figure points to each "Faith paper" they deem unacceptable for their dance festival poster, Two goes and tears it up (as they do with Remote's paper), which is possible in part because of their limitless power to tear paper, among other abilities.*]

* **Two**: And so are Bok... [*rips up her "Faith paper"*]
* **B****o****k**: Aw.
* **Two**: And Pen...
* **P****en**: Wait, don't tear it up just yet!
* **P****e****nci****l**: He spent about ten seconds on the toilet scribbling down all the letters and numbers—show some respect!

[*Two rips up Pen's "Faith paper".*]

* **Figure**: I would have chosen your "Faith paper" if you didn't have that look on your face that says: [*imitating Pen*] "It's the best one yet!"
* **P****en**: Buh...
* **Co****i****ny**: Oh, he can't help it, that's his default look. I haven't seen someone smirk like that since my father *gained* money on Black Monday!

[*Beat.*]

* **P****e****nci****l**: Eat the rich.
* **Two**: Pencil.
* **P****e****nci****l**: Aye?
* **Two**: It seems that you're out as well. [*rips up her "Faith paper"*]
* **P****e****nci****l**: Wot?
* **Figure**: And that's even as geometric typefaces are coming back into fashion. I think.

[*Spotlight effect on everyone but the last two contestants standing,* i.e. **Black Hole** *and* **Golf Ball**.]

* **?**: Whoops.

[*The spotlights shine on* **Black Hole** *and* **Golf Ball**. *A second later, the light is eaten by Black Hole, as is usual with such astronomical phenomena.*]

* **B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: Of course.

## Post-contest

* **Two**: As Black Hole and Golf Ball are the last pair to be eliminated from this mini-competition, they will not be up for elimination and are therefore the first contestants in the game to receive immunity in a non-team, non-points setting.
* **Figure**: [*spoken in an outspoken host-like manner*] While Bok, Coiny, Pen, Pencil, Pin and Remote will be *up! For! Elimination!*
* **B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: Thank you, Two.
* **Golf Ball**: Don't thank Two, but thank the unknown figure who has judged our papers of Faith.
* **Two**: [*correcting her*] "Faith papers"!
* **B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: I suppose you're right, Golf Ball. Thank you, unknown figure.
* **Figure**: Oh, I'm no unknown figure. I've a hunch you're dying to know who I really am, so I'll tell you. Better yet, I'll show you!

[*The figure takes off their cloak. The camera is positioned so that we don't see who is under it (although a gasping sound effect can be heard faintly) and there is a quick and immediate cut to the voting screen.*]

### **Voting screen**

**Scene**In a brand new, final-act-exclusive voting screen sequence, **Two** stands on the ground of the Fovitwe at night as the stars twinkle behind them. In a fit of technological advancement, the stars begin to move to make the assets of the contestants up for elimination, *i.e.* Bok, Coiny, Pen, Pencil, Pin and Remote.
* **Two**: Vote in the comments using the letter and square brackets for who you *don't* want to be eliminated! Vote for who you want to stay! The *two* people with the fewest votes will both leave the show in the last double elimination of *The Power of Two*!

[*Roll credits to Cher's actual song, "We All Sleep Alone".*]

## Stinger

### **The Opening**

**Scene**Very early in the morning. **Two** and **Five** are sitting on the ground in the opening between Flats 1 and 10.
* **Two**: So.
* **Five**: So.
* **Two**: Oh, don't play that game again. Now that we're seen together for the first time in ages, can you please tell me what has sent you away?
* **Five**: You just want me to be your co-host again.
* **Two**: The perfect late Purim gift.
* **Five**: Well, I can't do that. You know about my new graphic design job that... everyone still seems to be shocked about. I'm good at art! Why doesn't anyone know that?
* **Two**: I know, I did, I have, and I am... [*getting a bit confused*] absolutely proud of you, but why did you have to leave so soon and without saying anything?
* **Five**: That was... my mistake. I know such things are unforgivable, especially coming from a co-host, rather, an *ex*–co-host at that. But I was just so worried about how you'd react to my having a job away from *TPOT*. I'm sorry.
* **Two**: Don't be. It was quite foolish of me to hold onto a grudge for months and bring it into the competition. I haven't looked as sad as everyone *except* Coiny's father on Black Monday!

[*Two and Five laugh.*]

* **Two**: *Hanihille*, your presence is enough, and I mean it. You can even give as little or as much information as you want. Preferably the second option.
* **Five**: And you mean that? [*Two nods.*] Oh, you're the best ECH [*Subtitles: "ex–co-host"*] there is, *Catéra*! And for that reason I give you this totally rad honour.
* **Two**: Honour of what?
* **Five**: How would you like to be my date to the American Dance Festival?
* **Two**: *You*... want *me*... to keep dancing with you?
* **Five**: [*increasingly energized*] That's how it works.
* **Two**: Then let's dance!
* **Five**: ***AAAAAAAAAAAH!***
* **Two**: ***AAAAAAAAAAAH!***
* **[** **Two** · **Five** **]**: ***Muh-muh-muh-muh-muh-muh—***
* **Five**: Wait.
* **Two**: Muh.

[*Wide view of the Fovitwe, which quakes from the screams of the two hosts through the power of special effects.*]

* **Five**: We should probably be quieter.
* **Two**: Yes, much quieter.

[*Short silence. Suddenly, Two and Five open their mouths in silent screams of excitement as the new closing theme music swells, announcing that this episode has reached...*]

**THE END**
## Deleted scenes

* Pencil and Pen's children were going to be named risqué anagrams of the names of the children to whom they are references. Thus, the first-born daughter was named **Ribeye Cher Ass** (anagram of "Saye Schreiber"), the first-born son **Eris Rose Bich** ("Sio Schreiber"), and going down in age were **Jaice Herb Rivers**, **Cliche Sib Trailer**, **Sir Zebra-y Heretic**, **His B. Zero Archer**, **Acab Rover H. Sliders**, **Reach Brie Minxes**, **Q-Aerial Sass Charmer BS** and **Be Rich Sri Cel**. These were obviously scrapped and made invisible to all but those who'd be interested in such a thing.
	+ Another idea was for them to be named translations of their *P2O* names into Algebralien (just as *Cil* became *Soniri*)—thus, going down in the same order, one would get **Totchini**, **Tonira**, **Matchihini-issou**, **Sonicaritchirini**, **N'tchissouicatçouni**, **Tçourassoutchicou**, **Totchirihitchichirassou** and **Sanimoïmitchi**, **Tatchiritchimo Ho Soutchitototchito**.
	+ The idea of there being ten children débuting in this episode was scrapped in favour of one: the youngest. It's always best to start off small, isn't it?
* The contest was going to be a little different. Instead of coming up with fonts, they were going to have to come up with *posters*. (I could see that contest being more mainstream, *i.e.*, swept up by some other object show creator. Who besides typeface designers would like to watch people come up with handwritten fonts, anyway?)
* Pen was going to sing "I Got You, Babe", which I later changed to "The Beat Goes On"—I'm sure the real "Sonny in chair" would approve.
* The papers on which the contestants were to draw their samples of letters and numbers had about ten names before I standardized it all to "Faith papers" (quotation marks included), simply because I was tired of having to alternate between names.
* Pin was originally going to shout "Alleluia!" as soon as the spotlight shone on Black Hole on Golf Ball, rather than everyone but them. I changed this line to Black Hole's flat "Of course", since it would make sense for the light to... something (I am not an astrophysicist).
* Pencil was to be declared safe, and not Golf Ball. The figure was going to say that they chose Pencil's samples because geometric fonts (extrapolated from the single "A" on the "Faith paper") are coming back into fashion (a line I kept in the final version), and Pen was going to say something stupid:

**P****en**: Gee, I can remember when geometry was in style. It was at the collegiate, 1956. Why, I remember sitting right next to—
**P****e****nci****l**: Hush.

* Some extra acerbic dialogue to end the episode that I eventually decided wasn't as good as anything preceding it.

[*Enter* **Black Hole**, **Remote** *and* **Pen**, *wearing Death P.A.C.T. buttons to show that they're still friends with one another.*]
**Two**: What are you three doing here? It's almost morning. Shouldn't you all be asleep?
**B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: What is this *sleep* you talk about?
**P****en**: I think Two's talking about—
**Two**: Yes, yes, yes. Anyway, one of you looks like he has a question and I'm almost certain that that one of you is Black Hole, so...
**B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: Um. Yeah. My question was, why did you choose my design, Five? I had a feeling, that many would consider the wobbliness of it, to be horrendous.
**Five**: Well, I liked the wobbliness of the design. You see, the American Dance Festival, it represents everything that is, to say, American. With an election coming up this year that could change the ways of a society I've been monitoring ever since my stay on the Equation Playground, the wobbliness is just appropriate, don't you think?
**R****e****m****ot****e**: Oh, I've heard of the election. I'm all for Cary Dukakis.
**P****en**: Dukakis, eh? Omg, he must be Greek! Just like—
**B****l****a****ck H****o****l****e**: Just like you, man, we know.
**Two**: Come on, you three, into your little flats you go.
**P****en**: Oh, I see. You need a bit of alone time—I get it. [*winks and finger-guns them*]
**Two**: I don't know what you're implying, but this is a serious discussion so we ask that you excuse us.
**P****en**: [*giggles*] Come on, guys.
[*Exeunt, leaving* **Two** *and* **Five** *alone.*]
**Two**: So.
[*The ending theme music swells as Two and Five begin to chatter happily. Insert "The end" template here.*]

## Notes

1. ↑ I don't know the proper name for it but I had one, and I'm sure a lot of you had one as well.
2. ↑ Make of that as you will.
3. ↑ Fortunately, according to the Qur'an, particles of light are not considered food.

**Fake TPOT** [V]