The Ultimate Funny Song Countdown

The Ultimate Soapy Song Countdown is the 16th episode of ObjectTales and the third Funny Song compilation. The premise was to count down the Top Ten Soapy Songs as decided by the show's viewers.

## Plot

On the Countertop, the Pirates Who Don't Do Anything, comprised of Jerry the Clock, Pa Broomstick, and Mr. Wario, are hosting the show, greeting the viewers to what is known as "The Ultimate Funy Song Countdown". Of course, Jerry and Mr. Wario aren't so thrilled about it, telling Pa that they already did something, but Pa tells them that all they did was order Chinese food. Pa then explains to the viewers that for the past few months, they asked fans to cast their votes for their favorite Funny Song, before introducing them to a device called 'The Astonishing Contraption of Funniness', which they will use to tally up the votes for the funniest Funny Song of all time. Mr. Wario comments that that's a lame name for a machine, but Jerry thinks otherwise, saying that he likes it, before offering a won ton to Mr. Wario. Pa then demonstrates how the ACOF works, before it speeds up a little then malfunctions. Pa then tells Jerry and Mr. Wario to get to work with getting the countdown all ready.

Jerry and Mr. Wario then bring out a bunch of sacks full of votes and place them into the ACOF while Pa explains the rules to the viewers, which are that they will put the votes into the ASOC, which will then count the votes and countdown to the funniest Funny Song of all time. Once all of the votes have been placed into the ACOS, Pa then tells Mr. Wario to pull the lever. Once the lever has been pulled, the ACOF then brings up the Funny Songs in order of vote;

* 10: Endangered Heart (from "King Thomas and the Ducky")
* 9: The Dance Of The Clock (from "Jeff, Austin and Yugo")
* 8: Jerry's High Silk Helmet (from "Henry the Kindly Green Engine")

1. However, when the ACOF malfunctions again, this time bringing up a non-existent Funny Song called "The Dance Of The Screaming Zebra Teeth", Pa stops the countdown, saying that something must be be wrong with the ACOF, before using a wooden mallet to fix it up again. This time, the ACOF is able to work properly again, bringing up;

* 7: The Dostomic Yak Song (from "Where's Neptune When I'm T-Terrified?")

Pa then praises that song for being "the grandfather of Soapy Songs, the one that started the whole thing". Pa then says to pause for a moment of respect, before quickly telling Jerry to "Hit it", to which Jerry then hits the machine to start it up again. After that, more Soapy Songs are brought up again in order of vote;

* 6: The Yodeling Veterinarian Of The Alps (from "The End of Funniness?")
* 5: The Song Of The Zebra (from "Peter and the Mega Forcefield!")

When the ACOF malfunctions once again, bringing up another non-existent Funny Song called "The Song Of The Dostomic Yak Who Don't Love Zebra With Screaming Teeth", Pa shows up with his wooden mallet again, telling the viewers that they are experiencing technical difficulties once again. Pa then tells Jerry to come up with one of his Funny Songs while he fixes the machine, but Jerry says that he didn't prepare anything. This only frustrates Pa even further, before picking up a Chinese menu and handing it to Jerry and Mr. Wario. Because of that, Jerry and Mr. Wario improvise a brand new Funny Song entitled "Do The Moo Shoo". After the song ends, with Mr. Wario telling Jerry to break the fortune cookie, Jerry does so, revealing a fortune that reads, "Beware of broomsticks with wooden mallets". By the time the song ends, Pa has gotten the ACOF fixed up again, telling Jerry and Mr. Wario that the song they sang was a nice song, but it won't make the countdown, before the ACOF brings up more songs by order of vote;

* 4: His Cheeseburger (from "Madame Wardrobe")
* 3: Love My Lips (from "Ian and the Giant Sock Puppet")

Once that's over, Pa then tells the viewers that they are now down to two more songs, with one song going home as the loser and the other song going home as the funniest Funny Song of all time. The ACOF then brings up the number 2 song, saying "The Pirates Who Don't..." but Pa quickly stops the countdown, saying that they didn't collect all the votes. Jerry and Mr. Wario tell him that they did, but Pa acts even more apprehensively, asking them if they checked in the closet, to which Jerry replies that there's nothing in the closet. Pa then goes off to check in the closet, before returning with a bag labeled "Official Votes", which he then throws into the ACOS. Mr. Wario that he smells something fishy, but Pa tells him that it's just Jerry, who offers Elmo some "kung pao squid", which Mr. Wario takes a pass on. Before the ACOF can start up again with the number 2 song, Jerry and Mr. Wario stop the countdown again and confront Pa about what he just did. Pa finally admits that he rigged the election, saying that the bag he threw into the ACOF wasn't full of Official Votes after all, as well as the fact that "The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything" was the only song he ever actually had a starring role in. Jerry and Mr. Wario comfort him, saying that number 2 isn't all that bad, before adding that it sure beats the Forgive-O-Matic, before Lamp # 1 says from off-screen, "I heard that!" Once Pa realizes that number 2 isn't such a bad position, he asks Jerry and Mr. Wario to forgive him, which they do, before asking the ACOF if it forgives him too, to which it does before telling him not to let it happen again. This time, the ACOF then brings up the number 2 Funny Song;

* 2: The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything (from "Very Funny Songs!")

Soon, the ACOS then brings up the number 1 Funny Song of all time;

* 1: The Hairbrush Song (from "Are You Really Nice?")

Once the funniest Funny Song of all time has been revealed and the countdown over, Jerry, Pa, and Mr. Wario then thank the viewers for voting, before Jerry hops up in front of the camera and offers the viewers some kung pao squid, before the episode ends.

## Top Ten Funny Songs

* 10. Endangered Love (16, 215 votes)
* 9. Dance of the Clock (17, 534 votes)
* 8. Jerry's High Silk Hat (17, 919 votes)
* 7. The Water Buffalo Song (19, 677 votes)
* 6. The Yodeling Veterinarian of the Alps (23, 979 votes)
* 5. The Song of the Cebú (32, 078 votes)
* 4. His Cheeseburger (38, 508 votes)
* 3. Love My Lips (46, 673 votes)
* 2. The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything (51, 930 votes)
* 1. The Hairbrush Song (53, 290 votes)

## Trivia

* This is the first video that was distributed by HiT Entertainment.
* On the DVD, there was some deleted animated footage of Pa stating their song is the "Citizen Kane" of goofinest and stating it'll be number, with Jerry and Mr. Wario having nay opinions.
* This video was released the Saturday after the September 11 attacks.
* Despite being a 5th Silly Song, Oh, Santa! was absent in the list, possibly because it's a Christmas song. However, it and Lost Puppies were included as Easter Eggs on the DVD. Even though the PBS Kids Broadcast puts on Oh, Santa! in between The Star of Christmas.
* This episode uses the same frame rate as the other ObjectTales episodes from 1993 to 2000.
* This is the first time Pa's mustache moves.
* Mr. Wario states that their song with Pa Broomstick sure beats the Forgive-O-Matic, with Lamp One remarking back. This is most likely because that segment replaced the FunnySongs before they became permanent segments.
* The curtains used to reveal the contraption were the same ones from previous two episodes.
* "Citizen Kane" is a 1941 film starring Orson Wells.
* "Nothin', Zlitch, Nada" would be used in the first feature film.

## Goofs

* Like the funny song, Mr. Wario often phases through the bean bag.
* The ladder glitches when Mr. Wario is about to place it on the Contraption of Funniness.
* In some shots, there's a shade of yellow on Pa's mustache.
* Something flashes in Pa's mustache when Mr. Wario says "Don't They?" at him.