Revenge of the Flying Dutchman - Draft

The Revenge of the Flying Dutchman

**Flying Dutchman:** *[whistling]* Ah. Time to do laundry. *[places the clothes in the laundry]* There we go. All good! Time to go to the grocery store.

*[scene transitions to SpongeBob and Patrick playing "Launch the Cannon." ]*

**SpongeBob:** Hey Patrick, isn't Launch the Cannon so fun, right?

**Patrick:** Yeah Bob Sponge, I love launching cannonballs at things. It helps improve my accuracy.

**SpongeBob:** Charming words ol' Pink one!

**Patrick:** Okay, it's my turn! Let me see! I'm gonna fire this cannon at.... SQUIDWARD HOUSE!

**SpongeBob:** Uh, Pat, Squidward doesn't like cannon balls flying towards his property.

**Patrick:** *[launches cannon]* Uhhhhh what?

*[cannon hits Squidward's house and a huge explosion is seen and heard.]*

**SpongeBob:** Okay, Nevermind Patrick. It's best to move on now!

**Patrick:** One more shot! *[aims]* Hiyaa! Perfect aim!

*[Cannon goes off course and hits a green ship in the air.]*

**SpongeBob:** Uh Patrick? You just broke a guy's ship.

**Patrick:** It's a houseboat. I don't care. That guy can just buy a new one!

**SpongeBob:** But it looks very spooky and green though? Oh, someone's coming! Hide!

**Flying Dutchman:** Back from the grocers ready to have a feast. *[pauses and looks at the ship]* What the flim flam! Who did this?!

**Squidward:** Hey Dutchie! These blasted buffoons are the people you're looking for!

**Flying Dutchman:** AH HA! So you two scallywags were behind this! I should've known!

**SpongeBob:** PATRICK, LET'S RUN!

*[SpongeBob and Patrick start running away with the Dutchman not far behind. ♪ Slide Whistle Song ♪ starts playing.]*

**Flying Dutchman:** Get back here you two! I'm billing you for the damages!

**SpongeBob:** Patrick! Cut right here!

**Patrick:** SpongeBob, WHAT DO WE DO NOW?

**SpongeBob:** I have no idea bud!

**Flying Dutchman:** Stop right there! *[freezes SpongeBob and Patrick. ♪ Tomfoolery ♪ starts playing.]* I froze you, ha!. Now that I have you frozen, there's nothing you can do!.

**Squidward:** Oh really Dutchman? There'll probably just escape like the always do.

**Flying Dutchman:** Not anymore. I'm taking 'em to my boat or.. *[looks at dismantled boat]* *[unamused]* Oh, right.... my ship is broken.

**Squidward:** Now what are you gonna do? Send them to Davy Jones' Locker? Ha.

**Flying Dutchman:** Thanks for the idea! I'll use it now!

**Squidward:** It was just a suggestion! I meant.. er.. joke!

**Flying Dutchman:** Too late! Off to Davy Jones' Locker you go SpongeBob and Patrick!

**Squidward:** Oh look, there's a Jellyfish!

**Flying Dutchman:** Oh I absolutely hate Jellyfish! They always leave this useless, painful stings.

**Squidward:** Let those two go and I'll perhaps chase that jellyfish away.

**Flying Dutchman:** NEVER!

*[Jellyfish stings Dutchman.]*

**Flying Dutchman:** Eh, one jellyfish isn't gonna stop me.

**Squidward:** What about those guys over there?

**Flying Dutchman:** What? Yikes. A hundred jellyfish?! AHHHHH! *[floats away screaming.]*

**Squidward:** *[talking to himself.]* Now, if only there was a way to free SpongeBob and Patrick? Hmm.... Oh, I know. I'll use my oven that I'm cooking casserole in to melt the ice to free SpongeBob and Patrick. Ah Squiddy, you're a genius.

*[Squidward melts the small iceberg cube SpongeBob and Patrick were stuck in which frees them.]*

**Squidward:** Oh perfect!

**Both SpongeBob & Patrick:** YAY! We're free and we're home!

**Squidward:** What? This isn't my home.

**Patrick:** This isn't a home, this is a garbage can.

**Squidward:** Hey!

**SpongeBob:** Patrick, wanna go Jellyfishing?

**Patrick:** Sure pal!

**Squidward:** *[unamused.]* Oh brother.

**SpongeBob & Patrick:** Let's go!

**Flying Dutchman:** *[in the distance of the horizon.]* Curse you to vanquishers of all hooligans, scallywags and rapscallions!