326: That's My Domain, Don't Wear it Out

## Summary

Raphina casts *Banishment* (editor's note: or should that be *Cummerbunishment*?) and the giant scarecrow vanishes from the battlefield. Will then runs into the burning barn to look for Sin, and finds him struggling to open a stall door. Meanwhile, Batthwack witnesses Rosco *Misty Step*ing while fighting scarecrows, but his reappearance is accompanied by a highly disconcerting mass of featureless eyeballs.

## Synopsis

Now that Batthwack has successfully steered the giant scarecrow away from the inn, Rosco (who's still clinging to the creature's head) decides it's safe to begin attacking and hacks away at it with *Treebane*. Raphina and Mo are positioned by the inn with a few scarecrows still surrounding them, but the number seems to be dwindling. Raphina reaches over and grabs the cummerbund from Mo's suit and whips it around her head before launching it towards the giant scarecrow, simultaneously casting *Banishment*. Will notes the strange elasticity of the garment and in that moment as it fails through the air, realises that *Bill Suit's Suits* must have sold him a knock-off suit.

Will is already planning his revenge on Bill Suit as the cummerbund wraps around the giant scarecrow's left ankle. It trips, but before it can even fall, it winks out of existence and Rosco tumbles down, somehow landing with both feet firmly on the ground. He checks his person and is relieved to find that all his extremities, including his tie, are present and correct and still on this plane of existence. Raphina gets a strong sense that the monster is not coming back. She scrambles up Mo's arm, settling on his shoulders as three scarecrows claw at them. She casts *Healing Word* on Mo, who's still getting the benefits of her *Beacon of Hope* and the two work together as he stab, stab, stabs and kills all their assailants.

Will runs into the burning barn to look for Sin, not because he might need rescuing, but because as far as Will's concerned that scarecrow is coming back soon and they'll need Sin's help when it does. The elf is struggling with a stall door and refuses to leave without Lachrymose, but even when Will helps him, the door is stuck fast. Outside, Rosco notices three scarecrows heading for Oscar and confidently swings *Treebane* low to the ground, but the wet handle slips from his grasp and the axe flies off into the darkness.

What happens next takes place in just an instant. *Treebane* spins away from Rosco, and whether he is aware of it or not, he casts *Misty Step* again and blinks out of existence. Somewhere ahead of the axe, a tiny point of dark light expands almost instantaneously into the shape of Rosco tumbling out of a hole in the fabric of reality. What's very disquieting about it is Rosco's utterly terrified expression and the slimy, oozing mass of clamouring orbs, like featureless eyeballs, that seem to be chasing after him. The hole retracts back and disappears with a pop, leaving Rosco standing there just in time to catch *Treebane* and hew down another scarecrow.

Batthwack was standing nearby and saw this whole horrifying moment play out. He's not sure, but it even felt like those weird orbs could have fixed their globulous gaze on him just before they vanished.

## Quotes

* Eric: *"Raphina's strike with this elastic cummerbund was so masterful that you would worry about a part of you, some extremity of you, potentially getting transported into this other plane. Some part of your body, outside of your core, something sticking out of it, could have maybe gotten caught and taken away, but it pulled it away from your body in such a way that you found yourself, not only free of having any limbs or members or organs being snatched away from you, you are tumbling and immediately find yourself two feet on the ground, ready for action as the scarecrow has disappeared into nothingness. So, you do have your penis, is all I'm saying."*

## Trivia

* The episode title quotes Abby. A stunning *Bananishment* isn't quite enough for Raphina, who swiftly follows it up with a bonus action and also heals Mo. Eric: *"So he gets eight hit points."* Abby: *"Oh good."* Eric: *"Cool, and you get three if you're missing any. Thanks to your life domain. That's Raphina's domain, everybody."* Abby/Raphina: *"That's my domain, don't wear it out."* Eric: *"Raphina sure doesn't."* Touché, Eric. Touché.
* Eric makes reference to Raphina famously throwing a banana when casting *Banishment*. See episode 72: Bananishment.

## Recap

*Main article: The Music of Pork Fried Dice*
This episode featured Alex doing a recap in the form of a villanelle poem:

Spastic scarecrows twitch in cascading rain

Amid hushed feeble whinnies that belie distress

Wet straw ignites as our foes are slain

Glimpse of magic wooden door's alluring grain

As a gangster and king make plummeting aggress

Spastic scarecrows twitch in cascading rain

Paladin thresh and reap with scorching spiked chain

Druid clasping *Treebane*; his love of nature profess

Wet straw ignites as our foes are slain

Jarring hay-stuffed golem belches fires arcane

It's a lumbering, lurching march, says, *"In death you'll acquiesce"*

Spastic scarecrows twitch in cascading rain

With lightning, waves of thunder and sacred flame arraign

And horrific Eldritch magic, scarecrow souls we dispossess

Wet straw ignites as our foes are slain

Vaporously scale this robot like you would a crane

Then compel the wicked monster, make it with you obsess

Spastic scarecrows twitch in cascading rain

Wet straw ignites as our foes are slain

## Gallery

*Main article: The Art of Pork Fried Dice*

## References

1. ↑ Will did some self-defence shopping and bought Mo and Sheemie Bufflin-style suits from *Bill Suit's Suits* just before they set off on the party boat. See episode 306: We’ll Put a Candle in a Fish