Hansel: Kittens

Hansel hadn’t been able to learn any of the kittens’ names. He was fairly sure that everyone was just calling them different things at random. Eggs? Surely one of them wasn’t actually named Eggs.

But he liked them. He’d fed the feral cats that hung around the Grumpy Sausage, but they weren’t particularly … grateful about it. He’d ended up with a lot of scratches, even when he wasn’t trying to get close enough to pet them. The kittens scratched him, a little, too, but in a way he didn’t at all mind. He called the one that looked like Pumpkin ‘Pumpkin Jr.’, and the rest were referred to vaguely as ‘that one’ and ‘you’ and ‘the whitish one’ when it came up.

Names or no, he liked having the kittens aboard. He liked how much Sugar’s ship didn’t feel like the Red Blade. It was much smaller, for one, the Blade being a four-masted galleon, but her flowery decorations and the presence of tiny adorable animals were a far cry from a real pirate ship. It was enough like old times that he liked it, and not too much like old times that he hated it. It helped that Jonn was here, and Sugar and Roddy for that matter, and Goro.

It was … all right that Mishka could be here, sometimes, too. For now. He still thought he was probably making a terrible mistake by opening any channel of communication between them, but he was doing it. Being on the ship made it seem more acceptable. Like old times. The right old times. Of course, he hadn’t told Jonn, but Jonn hadn’t objected when he’d refused to share a room with him—or even questioned it. He’d seemed happy to share a room with Roddy. Hansel was glad someone was there to keep a closer eye on him, anyway.

Hansel knew he was causing some trouble on the ship. He knew he was excited about finally being on a pirate ship, even if they weren’t leaving port, and it was barely a pirate ship, and that was giving him a lot of … excess energy. Like a kitten. Not the tiny wiggling things that could barely walk, but the ones that were about five months old and climbed walls just because they could. Jonn was climbing walls. He’d settle down. He would.

It made him nervous when Jonn was around the kittens.

He’d been behaving. For a long time. Hansel thought he must be a good influence on the kid, some inexplicable goddamn way. But that made it seem like, maybe, Jonn was due for … something. Some terrible thing. Something Hansel would have to take him away for, because he would never be able to be around these people again, and Hansel couldn’t be away from him, but it would be even grimmer because Hansel actually liked these people. That was inexplicable too. He didn’t want to have to choose Jonn over them, but he knew he would.

So he kept an eye out. When he saw Jonn sitting cross-legged by the box the cats lived in, facing away from him, and could only make out a vague motion starting at his elbow, his entire body went slightly cold. Part of him wanted to just turn and walk away. If it was bad, maybe he just didn’t want to know. Jonn had been doing so *well*.

He stepped lightly, and when he was close enough to see over Jonn’s shoulder, he saw that he was just waving a seagull feather at one of the kittens, smiling softly. Thank god. Fuck. That was normal. That was fine.

Of course Jonn knew he was there. “Hey, Pops.”

“Hey.” He hesitated. Now was as good a time as any. “You still pissed at me?”

“Nah. I know this pirate ship thing was a bribe, but.” He looked up and grinned and shrugged. “It *has* worked.”

Relief. Jonn really had seemed more upbeat the past few days. Hansel didn’t realize this would mean so much so him, and he felt a little guilty for not doing it earlier. But this was as close to being out at sea as he could manage, and he wasn’t sure he’d’ve been able to handle even this until now.

He sat down next to his son, reaching out to waggle a finger at the kitten. It waved a paw at him and lost its balance. He glanced at Jonn. “You like the kittens?”

Jonn shrugged. “They’re cute. I like’em better than the ones you used to feed at the Sausage.” His expression soured a little. “Those things were always hurting you.”

“Well. They didn’t know any better. They were just scared. Also—” Hansel gave him an amused look— “you stabbed me *very* recently. In the back.”

“Does it help if I only kinda remember doing that?”

“Hm. No.” Hansel looked at him again. He was wearing his usual black cloak, but Hansel realized he was wearing something different underneath—it was nice, maroon and black silk with a little gold braiding. The sleeves covered his hands to the knuckle, leaving the fingers exposed. “Hey, what are you wearing? Is that new?” It just looked like too fine a thing for either of them to afford.

“Oh.” Jonn looked down and plucked at it. “It’s that armor you gave me.”

Hansel looked at him blankly, and Jonn snorted.

“Okay, sure. It’s that armor that mysteriously appeared on my bed, and that definitely wasn’t another bribe.” He paused, and lowered his voice a little in sincerity. “I do love it, though, Pops. Thanks.”

Huh. Armor that looked like silk in Jonn’s favorite colors. Appearing mysteriously on his bed. It had to be that glamoured armor that Roddy, Sugar, and Raef had recovered from those bandits—and Sugar had said she was going to give to Mishka. And Mishka had … given it to Jonn. Anonymously. He didn’t know how he felt about that, but it made him smile before he could consciously consider his feelings.

He looked away. Of course he couldn’t tell Jonn that. He wasn’t sure if Mishka was trying to cause trouble or be nice—he wasn’t great at the latter. But at least he’d done it the right way, if he had to do it.

Jonn snorted at him again and went back to playing with the kitten. “It doesn’t have to be a whole thing. I said thanks. You say you’re welcome.”

“You’re welcome,” Hansel said dryly. For a moment there he’d gotten caught up on the fantasy of Mishka actually being in Jonn’s life. It might be … Well, it was stupid to think about it. Things were too complicated now. They had always been too complicated.

Jonn tapped the kitten on the top of its head with the feather, and when it swiped at it with a clumsy paw, it toppled over. Hansel saw Jonn smile and couldn’t be sure what kind of smile it was. He got that cold feeling again.

“Jonn, you’re—.” He hesitated. How to phrase this delicately. “You’re being nice to the cats, right? You’re—we don’t have to talk about this, right?”

He looked up sharply. “What? Of course not.”

“I’m just—.”

“I told you I would stop. I promised.”

“I know.” Hansel put a firm hand on his arm. “I know that. But I know you’re … excited about being on the ship. I just don’t want all that energy to slip into bad habits. *Old* habits,” he stressed.

After a moment, Jonn scowled. “Okay. I get that. I understand. But I’m not going to do anything.”

“I know you’ve been causing a little trouble with Sugar,” Hansel said carefully.

“I’m just teasing her. She’s adorable.” He laughed. It wasn’t a laugh Hansel enjoyed—not because it was cruel, but because it was careless.

“You need to be nicer to her.”

Jonn rolled his eyes.

“Jonn, she’s the captain. You need to respect her.”

It was underhanded, but fuck it. Jonn froze, having clearly not thought about it that way. Hansel waited for him to process it, knowing he’d won when Jonn’s expression turned a little sullen.

“Well, she’s not much of a captain. We don’t even sail anywhere.” His lips twisted. “But fine. She *is* the captain. I’ll let up on her but you told me how you and Mishka joked with each other, and he was *your* captain.”

Hansel winced. Never should’ve shared those stories. “We were married. I know you don’t think of Sugar that way. Look, you barely know her—I know you want to joke with her, but she’s not joking back, is she?”

“Oh.” He thought again. “That … makes it bad?”

“Yes, Jonn.” It never occurred to him that he had to explain that. Shit.

“Oh. Okay.”

“You should apologize to her.”

“Ugh.”

“I’ll go with you.”

He sighed dramatically, understanding that this wasn’t ‘I’ll support you’ but ‘I’m making sure that you do it’. “Fine.”