Egocu Etbpm

**Egocuetbpm** is the YouTube URL, with different capital letters, for a parody video made by Possum Chowg and his friends for a high school English class in June 2022, the year I got a life. Best month of my life. I looked pretty bad in that visor, and my role as Fin-Kedinn was botched, but we all had a good time. It was made up of a crossover between *COAD, The Lord of the Rings*, *Ender's Game (for people who like big books,)* and Joseph Campbell himself.

## Cast

We are not giving out our names, but here are the characters.

Mr. Locher (we'll give his name out.): He was the toughest teacher we ever had, wrote vague all over our essays, is incapable of sweating, and if you got a grade higher than a C in his class, you were really lucky.

Joseph Campbell: Mr. Locher's hero, with a thousand faces. Locher has a kajillion VHS tapes to show us about the hero's journey, the whale, slaying yourself, and so on. The model for my World Spirit design.

The genie, presumably the one from the live-action version of *Aladdin* played by Will Smith.

Torak

Renn

Fin-Kedinn

Gandalf, from LOTR of course.

Galadriel, another LOTR character.

Ender, from his own series with the buggers and shit, never read it.

## Plot

We made this all up as we went, so we know it's stupid. My punctuation and apparent vagueness would not make Locher proud.

Mr. Locher is chillin out in his house, when he finds an oil lamp with a genie inside. The genie grants him three wishes. First Locher wastes two by saying he wants to be taller, then to be able to sweat. The genie declines both of these, due apparently to rules against physical alterations. Then Locher wishes that all the characters in his favorite novels were real... and the genie accepts his final wish. so he heads off to Camino Real Park, Ventura, California to meet a few fictional characters.

First, Locher runs into Gandalf and Galadriel on the bench, and sits down to talk. They have a nice talk and all. Then Torak shows up... that guy would probably play a better Bale, he's a boater with long curly blonde hair and all... Torak goes full-on oogabooga berserk and Lacher admires his physique creepily, begging him to put a shirt back on.... hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm seems susp-

THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN everyone except Torak (we miss you s.c.) we're all at a new park, Arroyo Verde. Ventura visitors, this is the best birthday party spot in town. Gandalf comes out of the bushes to say hello, and suddenly Fin-Kedinn yells to bow to him due to his slightly oversized in comparison, yet tiny stick. (Unintentional dick joke). The group then goes searching for Locher's birthday present, or something, I can't remember, but we searched for something. I've been cringing at this video, especially at my own lines, too much and can't even find the link. Then we got into the new playground, few little kids were there, pulled LOCHER (the guy who played him) onto a hammock to rest. Locher was apparently out of shape and to o tired to run, with *Party in the USA* playing in the background. I get memories every time I hear that song still... Then Locher got to meet Joseph Campbell himself after finding his new present, probably a shard of plastic or something. Well, that was the end except for us running in and out of the canopy...

Then I ran to one kid's house in my worn-out adidas tennis shoes to see the film being put together... everyone expected me to go home since I had not planned to be there. Least they were happy to see Possum Chowg afterwards...