Boiled landcrab

Boiled land crab is a food from the south of the downfall and is considered by many to be a good compromise between cheapness and luxury. The taste of boiled land crabs is similar to the taste of lobster though the meat is tougher and the two digestive tracts must be removed before consumption.

To boil a land crab first take the live creature (with gloves of course) and push a knife through the gap in the back of it's head, first by twisting it and then jabbing to kill the creature humanely. This step has been done for centuries despite not being necessary both as a form of respect to these animals that are the symbol of the southern fields and the fact thag land crabs that are being cooked alive have a tendency to knock pots full of boiling water over unsuspecting chefs. Next up the gaps that connect the claw's base to the now hopefully dead land crabs's body need to be pierced with a knife from below as their nervous systems tend to have strong reflexes for a while after death if not severed. The land crab may now be lowered into a pot of boiling water spiced with salt, pepper, butter, a bit of honey, and lots of lemon juice or dried shallem. After boiling for 30 minutes \* the kg of the land crab the now red shell full of meat may be removed. A heavy hammer is to be used to break the shell which must be a turquoise-green on the inside unlike the red exterior if the crab is healthy. All the legs may be twisted to pull out additional meat besides the last two that have paddle like shapes as those have lots of unsavory vessels filled with coppery green blood. The tail can be cut near the sides and separated segment by segment to reveal a large bit of red-turquoise striped meat that is fairly thin like the land crab's tail itself. This part is the most plentiful but of meat though it needs to be cut into one third off of each edge from the sides to reveal two digestive tracts that must be removed. If this bit of meat does not curve after being taken out then the crab was most likely male. This is due to female crabs having stronger and more flexible tail muscles used to protect their eggs. These muscles thus still kept some tension after being cooked. The main body and the head may be thrown away as they contain little good meat and the last part that remains are the claws. These are considered a delicacy as the muscles that form them are fairly large though soft and non-fibrous in texture. They are to be taken by hammering the sharp side of a knife into the side of the claw and then twisting the knife as strong as possible. If the claw armor is not separated by a clean crack then the sides of the claw may be softly hammered, if any cracks appear do not continue. Claw muscles are to be cut to separate the main, light turquoise-pink part of the muscle from the end that was in the tip of the pincher that has a crimson white color. The main segment of the muscle can be cut to thin slices and is best eaten on its own due to the really soft texture and simple taste while the pincher tip muscle can be eaten in one bite and has a very chewy texture and rich taste.

Land crabs are fairly common and often hunted due to their large and sometimes harmful population numbers so boiled land crab is a common food at lots of southern downfall villages. The claw, which most agree is the tastiest unseasoned, has a tradition of being given to a boarding crew's leader after a land crab was caught by it's crew as a form of respect to their capitan. The leader must eat the claw unsliced and with his hands due to a belief that eating in a fancy manner or eating luxurious food are both completely fine unless you are eating luxurious food in a fancy manner in which case you are starving the barbaric side of your heart that keeps you alive in a battle.