Sperg Wars: The Farce Awakens

> *"I have the high ground!"* - Someone, probably.
>
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## Why does this exist?

This exists because Jubbz, Rainstorm, Evan, Moosh, and Team started randomly doing this on Evan's Isaac strem. I don't even know anymore.

## Characters

### Darth Spergius (Darth Sidious)

Also known as Chancellor/Emperor Evan Palpatendies, the Dark Lord of the Slither who teaches the ways of the cuck and never installs his GPU, which is why he is eventually killed by his apprentice.

### Jubbz Suckwalker (Darth Slurpder)

A great Jedi trained under Udie-Ef-Teamnobi who eventually learns the ways of the cuck from Darth Spergius after in falling in love with Eppyme. He gains a suit of dark armour after being turned into fried chicken by his former master.

### Udie-Ef Teamnobi

A Questmaker who likes teaching, has too much patience with bad people, and when he's ultimately had enough of everyone's crap, hold up his arms and says "just end me."

### James Suckwalker

The son of Jubbz who later becomes a Questmaker under the tutelage of masters Udie-Ef Teamnobi and Moosh. He leads the rebellion and says fuck way too much. He is also the brother of Princess Quark.

### Moosh

An ancient Questmaking master who is the head of the council. He's increasingly lazy. He does a lot of sitting around in a swamp and shit. He used to make quests.

### Eppyme

A senator from Naboo along with his buttduck companion Rub Dub Dinks, Eppyme falls in love with Jubbz after they meet on Tatooine.

### Russ Windu

A Questmaker who is carefully balanced between the forces of the sane and the sperg. He is killed by Darth Spergius and the fallen Jubbz Suckwalker.

### Than Satellitolo

A gunslinger smuggler who joins James on his quest to defeat the Empire and falls in love with Princess Quark.

### Princess Quark

A princess from Alderaan who is a rebel leader and turns out to be the sister of James. She falls in love with Than Satellitolo.

### Orithanbaka

I don't know who Orithan is, but I guess he's a furry. Someone edit this >.> <.<

### Lando Calrussian

An old friend of Than's who was the original owner of the Millennium Falcon. Just wanted to make a collab quest but then this deal keeps getting worse all the time.

### Grand Moff Satellite

The head of the Death Satellite and Darth Slurpder's boss. He dies when James blows the fuck out of the Death Satellite.

### Jayba the Hutt

He's a hutt and a gangster. He likes to eat.

### Mooshgo Fett

The father of Mooshba Fett and the template for the clone army. The clones are really lazy.

### Mooshba Fett

A feared bounty hunter known for putting off his kills way past when their due. He'll do it well, but he never said he'll do it fast.

### Kay

A mysterious and badass girl from Jakku. She seems to be the only gal (and person in general, most likely) around here with a head on her shoulders.

### Dimentio Ren

A Knight of the Screenshot Order and the son of Quark and Than Satellitolo.

### Rinn

A former stormtrooper who meets Kay on Jakku. He fell in love with the girl and it turned out she wasn't into dat, so he dates Poe Daevinron instead.

### Poe Daevinron

A pilot of the resistance. He is really gay for Rinn.

### DJ Kanata

The little orange lady who gave Kay her first Lightsaber.

## Places

### Death Satellite

A massive space station that is definitely no moon. When the Death Satellite fires its weapon, it says "Evan you're fired."