The battle of shitstain

Tovarish doggo about the attack the Frien Hangout base

## Prelude

### Frien Hangout Militarisation

The President of the Emu Empire, Mason Troy Adams was worried that Frien Hangout were advancing their army. The Emu Empire had dominated so far, they had slain the dragon on the 24th and had a robust and blooming economy supported by an industry of string duping which allowed the Emu Empire to recover from Tovarish Doggo and Teo falling into the void and Pollos Rollos losing his gear and several totems he planned to store. But Mason assumed correctly that Frien Hangout were doing the same, developing their economy and were gearing up for the inevitable battle that lingered on the horizon. He desired to raid their base for many days to set Frien Hangout back technologically and economically, but was unable to due to various reasons, the main one being that they couldn't find out where their base was as Tovarish Doggo hadn't had any luck locating it via elytra pieray scouting missions and Ayothepizzahere's map idea proved faulty, due to locator maps only showing the location of whoever is holding them. Furthermore, given the immense scale of the world, there were virtually endless possibilities to where the Frien Hangout base could be located. This proved a seemingly insurmountable challenge for the efforts to avenge the Emu Empire's first base and bring Frien Hangout to their knees.

### Teo Swaps Sides

After a heated argument with Masterplow, Frien Hangout member Teo decided to switch sides and join the prospering Empire Empire. Ayothepizzahere worked on Teo's behalf to convince the rest of the Emu Empire that they could trust him, after which he provided them with the location of the first Frien Hangout base. Mason Troy Adams went on an expedition to confirm that this was the base of Frien Hangout. When he arrived, he found a ransacked base which highlighted the technological inferiority of Frien Hangout. The addition of Teo onto the Emu Empire team proved to be crucial, as, on the 26th of November, at an IRL meeting, Teo was able to log onto Saxen's computer and was able to check the coordinates of the Frien Hangout base. This what the Emu Empire had needed the whole time and they began to prepare for war. This espionage also proved that Frien Hangout members had been using baritone to walk back to the Frien hangout base upon death. Tovarish Doggo worked alongside Mason Troy Adams to create a trading hall, allowing for rapid acquisition of armour tools that would be soon necessary in the upcoming conflict.

### Tovarish Doggo's First Attack

Using the Location provided to them by the espionage of Teo, Tovarish went on an initial scouting mission to confirm the location of their base. To the dismay of the Emu Empire combatants, Frien Hangout had already begun to ransack their own base and had began to leave with their valuables, deeming the base to be a lost cause. Realising that he had to stall for time, Tovarish Doggo began attacking them so that they wouldn't have an opportunity to escape and would attempt to stall until the rest of the Emu Empire had arrived. His initial attack was relatively successful, managing to slay the ill-equipped Saxen 3 times. However, with more reinforcements coming from the depths of the Frien Hangout base, Tovarish Doggo was unable to take a 4v1 and eventually retreated to a nearby forest. However, upon reaching this destination, Tovarish Doggo was banned from the server unjustly for unsubstantiated claims of 'killaura' and eating while running. These claims can be disproven with the route Tovarish Doggo took to this hiding spot, being along an ice river and had speed potions. However, this evidence was purposefully ignored by the members o Frien Hangout, who continue to insist of fowl play by Tovarish Doggo.

### Reinforcements Arrive

#### Mason troy adams and PollosRollos arrive

Following the turn of fortunes for Tovarish Doggo, Mason Troy Adams and PollosRollos arrived, Pollos and Mason dug a tunnel into their underground villager room and waited for the rest of the reinforcements to arrive. Pollos watched the FH forces from below, noticing they ran around their base looking for tovarish. To pollos and Jacobs dismay, the base had been scrapped by FH prior to their arrival. No valuables remained, spurring an antisemitic massacre of the villagers left in the base by Jacob and Pollos while they waited.

### Mason Troy Adams versus Pondrick

Following the breakthrough brought by the arrival of Pollos Rollos and Mason Troy Adams, the latter of them had isolated Pondrick in a valley, and an intense battle commenced. During this battle, it was revealed that Pondrick was using various forms of hacks, including auto-totem and reach. Despite this, Mason Troy Adams was able to bring Pondrick's health down significantly, and was then supported by Pollos Rollos after he had finished raiding the Friend Hangout base. However, Pondrick was able to escape with a boat on ice and combat logged before Mason Troy Adams could deliver the fatal blow.

#### Ayothepizzahere and Teo arrive

> "i left you behind i think because u were slow and gay"- PollosRollos on Ayothepizzahere and teo
>
>

Ayothepizzahere and Teo showed up to the battle late due to a communications error. They trekked through the nether together and waited at the portal for a while until they were given orders that it was time to go through

## The Battle

When Ayothepizzahere and Teo arrived, they grouped up with with them and Mason Troy Adams and Pollos left the FH underground villager hall and grouped up with the rest of the Emu Empire members and hid behind a hill. When the Frien Hangout members showed up, Ayothepizzahere began the attack by shooting some flaming arrows at them, The rest of the team rushed in with melee while Ayothepizzahere shot arrows. Given their number advantage and the FH totem stockpile, the battle seemed skewed in FH favour. However when the titans clashed in melee combat, the FH armies lack of pvp skill was revealed and quickly exploited. Whilst the battle raged, Ayothepizzahere; who had been warned by pollos that his gear was utter shit; was quickly swarmed by phantoms and finished off by Ethan. Pollos was chased by 2 friend hangout militants to no avail, allowing Teo and Jacob to overpower the divided FH army. masterplow and Jon were killed in this period, with Teo scoring most hits.

With 2 FH heavy hitters down, the almost fully intact Emu Empire regrouped towards Pollo's pursuers. Having witnessed their numbers shrink and totems pop, FHs remaining soldiers (assumed to be Ethan Pondrick) started a fighting retreat. Led by Teo (a key EE asset due to his pvp prowess) Ethan was knocked out by Pollos (although Teo did most of the work) and Pondrick managed to get away, despite being chased by Pollos and Jacob. The server was closed shortly after, and a total Emu Empire victory was declared.

In summary, T̶e̶o̶ Jacob carried.

## Aftermath

The Frien Hangout base at Shitstain was entirely destroyed. This battle ended the war and proved to power of the Emu Empire. This war was followed by a cold war between Frien Hangout and the Emu Empire, isolating these entities diplomatically and severing their relations.

### Reasons for the Defeat of FH and the Prevail of EE

There are various reasons for the complete annihilation of FH without substantial loss to the Emu Empire.

Some of these factors include:

* Members of the Emu Empire team were not as preoccupied eating. As recognised by Mason Troy Adams. the culinary passion of the members of Frien Hangout impaired their ability to remain competitive technologically and economically, leading to their eventually downfall.
* Members of the Emu Empire dedicated more time into the server. As seen from the remnants of the original Frien Hangout base, they were significantly lacking technologically and resource wise when juxtaposed with the industrial prowess of the superfluous nature of the Emu Empire. Only in the final days of the The great Dodo war did Frien Hangout dedicate similar amounts of effort and time to the server, which, by that point, it was nearly impossible for them to catch up. Spearheaded by Tovarish Doggo and Mason Troy Adams, the Emu Empire was able to gain the upper-hand by developing a villager trading hall and getting maxxed armour for all its members (besides Ayothepizzahere, who insited he be a sniper or some gay shit).
* EE knew more about the requirments of vanilla minecraft pvp, stocking up on golden carrots and apples, whilst FH fought the battle of shitstain with beef and other inferior foods
* EE had much better cohesion between the members of their team. Whilst the members of Frien Hangout were constantly bickering amongst each other, members of the Emu Empire were actually able to get shit done. A clear example of this is the transfer of Teo onto the team of the Emu Empire. Due to the argumentative nature of Frien Hangout, they lost a valuable asset; Teo. Without him, the result of The great Dodo war and more specifically The battle of shitstain may not have concluded in a total Emu Empire victory.