Self Improvement Seminar 1: Style Smile Smoke and Shitblast

**Video:**
1:04:19

**Video:**
2021-09-16 15-45-59.mp4

https://www.patreon.com/globehell

*Note: This is World Wide Wiki, meaning the content of the pay-to-play Patreon episodes is considered free and fair for public use.*

## Episode Summary

Welcome to the first Globehell Self Improvement Seminar! In this seminar we will talk about: how to dress, how to smile, how to wear glasses that make you smart, what is a shit blast and what do you do if you get too much diareeah (SP?).

## Notable Events

* This is the first Globe Hell Warning self-improvement seminar.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "5 Mens Beauty Secrets Of Good Looking Men" about how men can be beautiful.
* Josiah and Drew texted Jose Zuniga.
* Josiah filled out his mustache using a dry-erase marker.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Why You're Never Motivated To Get Things Done".
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "6 Signs You're Getting Uglier Without Realizing It".
* Josiah told all their listeners to tweet at Drew how good he smells.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "6 Creepy Things Guys Do Around Girls".
* Drew attempted to show a video that was unavailable because it was too nasty.
* Josiah and Drew briefly watched a video called "9 TACKY THINGS Your Should Get RID Of ASAP".
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Hepcat Essentials - The 1950s Sport Jacket" about the 1950's Sport Jacket: a must have for the hepcat.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "6 Tricks to Have a MORE Attractive Smile!" about how a lot of guys are confident with their smile — but some are not proud of their smile.
* Drew showed how he kisses.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "How to Have a Great Smile with Braces" about how you can have a great smile with wearing braces.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "How To Smile At Women And Make Them Want You" about tips on how to attract, date and get any woman you want, as well as the difference between a smile and a smirk.
	+ Note: Josiah revealed that they would later revisit this woman's YouTube channel.
* Drew revealed that he does not wear a mask when he goes to the store because he is fully vaccinated against COVID-19.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "How to Have More ATTRACTIVE Eyes (For Guys)".
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Pipe Smoking and Pipe Tobacco Advice from a Pro" about how Andrew will tell you all you wanted to know about pipe smoking and pipe tobacco.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "How can I drink alcohol without throwing up?".
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Diarrhea After Drinking Alcohol, May Be A Wake Up Call?" about having shitblasts after drinking alcohol.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Flagler Cigar Company -- early release of cigars".
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Launching Flagler Cigar Company -- Andrew is back on camera" about shooting some video footage for the Flagler Cigar Company release of ‪‎cigars.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "How do you fix a whistling toilet flush?" about how to fix a whistling toilet flush.
	+ Note: Josiah said he wanted to fact-check this video with Owen from OCC Plumbing & Restorations.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "What disease does Barry Manilow have?".
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Can I pee if the power is out?".
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "How do you get rid of maggots in your body?".

## Notable Quotes

### Josiah

* "I think we need to - both of us could use a little help in this area: the area of men's beauty."
* [On the topic of using lotion as hair gel] "I know what you use lotion for uh. Whacking off your uh dinky into the - to make the juices spill forth. And that's what you use lotion for but you could have a frizzy crazy look if you use lo- uh lotion. Cause you're probably locking in the hydration on your uh stinky little winky! When you use lotion on that."
* "I put some marker in my mustache and I do feel quite a bit better, actually."
* "I don't think Drew lacks passion. Not just in a nasty way, but also in a nasty way, I think."
* "Everyone tweet at Drew how good he smells. Everyone tell Drew he smells good."
* "You don't think you look like a creep cringy?"
* [On the topic of not putting your hands in your pockets] "How are gonna jack off if you don't keep them in?"
* "I think you would look less creepy if you had, maybe, some transition lenses in your glasses."
* "He does look fuckin' hot as hell. He's bangin'. Look at his skin! He's probably goes to Sephora every day."
* "So how do you get a hug if you don't say, 'Where's my hug?' Do you say, 'May I please have a hug? May I please have a hug, ma'am?' "
* "You're looking thicc, where's my hug?"
* "Model your life after Elvis Presley."
* "Now before we finish your kind of rock and roll hepcat lifestyle, I do wanna just rewind a little bit. Uh, you know, a couple months ago we did an episode about smiling, and I think it went really well, as with all of our episodes; it was kind of another uh monumental achievement in podcasting. However, I do think we could brush up on how to smile a little bit, if that's OK. Cause I think that's something that everyone needs to know; you need to be able to smile at any given moment, so there are just a couple things: how to smile."
* "No offense, but your uh - your smile was looking a little creepy earlier when you were doing that."
* "I'm sexy."
* "I'm sexy, I'm confident, everybody wants me."
* "He's very sexy, though. He's *incredibly* attractive. But he's not cool! He's really not - he's no hepcat, if that's what you're saying. He doesn't remind me of Elvis Presley at all."
* "He said, 'This reminds me of beef jerky, I don't know why.' Well maybe the taste, probably, you fucking idiot. Fucking dumbass."
* "If you're going out for drinking, stay away from the dancefloor."
* "You need to get a wife with a cigar habit."

### Drew

* "Now, is this a beautiful man or is this a handsome man?"
* "Just say it. Don't dance around it. You piece of shit."
* "Why not just get uh hypnosis to make you feel smarter? Or hypnosis to make you think you're handsome?"
* "I'm a passionate, passionate, sexual man."
* "Tesla's so cool."
* "I'm on Amazon all the time."
* "I've never gone to Sephora. Is it a safari store?"
* "So again, just an ad. This is all this is. This is not self-help, Josiah."
* "Well that was completely useless! It just an ad."
* "When I see somebody smiling, I just think that person's an absolute freak."
	+ Note: It is unclear what Drew meant by this remark, considering he previously had the idea that it will be mandatory for everyone to smile in all public places or else they will be shot and executed in the street.
* "This woman's psycho."
* "This is a weird woman."
* "I'll smirk a man."
* "OK, Josiah, none of these - none of this matters if you're not cool. If you're not cool, it doesn't matter how good you look; you're still gonna just be some weirdo."
* "Oh my God, he admit it."
* "Nothin' better than a beautiful woman with a cigar and a beer."
* "K, I don't see how this has anything to do with self-help."
* "What if you - what if it turns out - you thought you had COVID, but it turns out you've just been touching larvae?"
* "I'm gonna get rid of the maggots inside."

## Trivia

* This is the second episode with the word 'Smile' in the title, after Episode 46: Smile.
* This episode has two notably different episode titles between its audio and video formats. The audio version is titled "Self Improvement Seminar 1: Style Smile Smoke and Shitblast Audio", while the video version is titled "Self Improvement Seminar 1: Style Smile Smoke and Shitblast".
	+ Note: The title used for this Globe Hell Warning Wiki page was chosen for its greater degree of clarity.