Ark's Journal: 9th to 12th of Monpel

### 9th of Monpel

No visions from Moonblade. Managed to procure food for rest of week with Tolyr’s bonus from book retrieval. Dragon hunters returned, telling tales of glory. Another song for Valorie, surely, a companion to the Kazreme one. ~~Should tell her about the~~  No desire to press, what has ~~Archm~~ Clarity said? Perhaps should have accompanied to Froststone? Reckless, conflux proved how little bladesinging matters against elemental damage. Glory not worth death~~?~~. Post-dragon exploits more interesting though True Polymorphed hero distressing. Perhaps ~~Archm~~ Clarity can dispel. Yezra put Nerulla to flight, impressive. Imagine will be lauded in next theater performance. Even Lee might be impressed with divinely inspired exploits. ~~Perhaps write home~~ foolish, first must establish name here, building some reputation with dragonborn at least, promising designs for spellcrafted amulet against seasickness. Could ignore octopus for welcome of lodge.

### 10th of Monpel

No visions from Moonblade. Considered Otiluke’s puzzle, narrowed down next trials with some assumptions, hope golem counter resets. Little accomplished but too exhausted from adventuring to do otherwise.

~~she has brown hair and purple eyes~~

~~when she is near me time just flies~~

~~but I am simply nobody~~

~~so why does she believe in~~

From hill outside Vrall, saw clouds roll in, strange weather, sudden flash, lightning struck tower. Imagined attack, ran to render aid. Found Yezra and Nexrin tangled at foot of tower. Witnesses explain Yezra put Ra’al to flight! Lee would definitely be impressed. Definitely not writing to Lee or any of them. Perhaps Yezra will have new thoughts on reciprocal responsibility when granted power by other being. Tempus demonstrably gives her great gifts. What does she do for him? In any case, songworthiness assured now. Should congratulate? Tomorrow, today likely wishes to celebrate Nexrin's health.

### 11th of Monpel

No visions from Moonblade. Went to buy food. Braved ferry for NT in hopes of speaking with Yezra, saw dragonborn hunter and waved. No response, perhaps forgotten me? Thought had built some reputation on the island. Should have known could not last. Could not bring self to enter lodge. Returned to Vrall. Uuronian mage soliciting spellcasters for casting of newly designed spell to mitigate food shortage. Perhaps finally own spells can be of some use—in mageline, far more powerful mages cast, own spells redundant. Will devote magic to welfare of Kiorans. Sim would be proud? Do not write to any of them yet.

~~My bliss~~

~~was never this~~

~~and never meant to be.~~

~~I give no thought to being me~~

~~and yet am so myself that I can’t bear~~

~~the feeling filling me, the painful truth: I care,~~

~~and I can take no refuge in my feigned indifference…~~

~~No longer! I must keep my distance for my own defense.~~

~~I dream of loving most the one who finds me fair~~

~~but cannot love for living in despair.~~

~~I long for equanimity,~~

~~the one way to be free.~~

~~And yet I miss~~

~~that kiss.~~

### 12th of Monpel

No visions from Moonblade. Attended Stonetongue class with Uzmir and Uuronian. No progress. Uuronian now explains spellcasters of Kiore mobilized to cast custom spell, own magic redundant again. Thousands of Kiorans fed, Uuronian singlehandedly solved crisis. Even successfully learning spellcraft will not be enough to distinguish self. Unremarkable and easily felled in combat, merely amateur craftsperson, last among local researchers, forgotten by dragonborn.  Cannot even write a poem. Perhaps Vrall is wrong place to be. Moonblade never indicated it. Return to subcontinent? Moonblade silent.