Session 58-B: Rule of Three

## Key Plot Developments

Amidst the treacherous realm of Azzagrat, Glyn as he is known in this infernal plane, finds himself in a precarious situation. The vile deity Lolth, in cahoots with Baphomet, has unleashed an attack on Azzagrat, leaving Glyn in a perilous predicament.

With the realization that he must return to the material plane to perform a crucial ritual with the Gobs, Glyn gazes upon his demonic form in a mirror, fully aware of the urgency of his mission. He hastily compiles a list of tasks that must be accomplished: acquire details on the empowered demon-summoning ritual, devise a convincing tale to sway the Gobs into undertaking the ritual, study the dynamics of his companions, ascertain that the Gobs' abilities, such as Dawnbringer's, do not obliterate his demonic form, retrieve Azzagrat's equipment, and attend to the matter of Twinkleface's lost horn.

Unperturbed by the unsavory spectacle of Tasha and Graz'zt engaging in coitus, Glyn departs for Rule of Three, where he seeks counsel from a trusted advisor. Rule of Three imparts vital advice to Glyn, urging him to visit the Weal of the Blooded and clandestinely execute the empowered ritual, despite the omnipresence of Lolth's nefarious spiders. Additionally, he counsels Glyn to remain tight-lipped about the fate of the Gobs that had been fed to Yeenoghu, cautioning him that knowledge of their gruesome end would prove detrimental to their cause.

ROT informs Glyn that Trix, the object of Graz'zt's trial, may not possess erudition, but is endowed with intuitive wisdom. He suggests that Glyn employ the aid of Twinkleface and his goblins to thwart the Demogorgon's incursion into a grove. ROT advises Glyn to use the unicorn's testimony to win the goblins' favor, and by defending the grove, Glyn can further strengthen his relationship with the goblins. Glyn proposes using Dulcinea's grove since Bogtooth already has a connection to it.

Glyn enquires if he has a means of teleportation, to which ROT suggests contacting the Society of Brilliance. However, Glyn's concerns regarding Dawnbringer's role in the tragedy that befell his kin troubles him. ROT reassures Glyn that Dawnbringer was not responsible for the crystalline slaughter of his family and friends. It was Nicholas Ice Cream who orchestrated the heinous act, framing Dawnbringer in the process. Glyn is shocked by this revelation.

The conversation then turns to Graz'zt's trial, and Glyn discovers that the agreement he struck with Zariel and the devils is in peril. Nicholas Ice Cream's continued absence threatens Trix's soul and the other goblins, and Graz'zt will also have to pay the price for failing to uphold his end of the bargain. Faced with this dire predicament, Glyn and ROT devise a cunning ploy to deceive Lolth.

ROT decides to create a simulacrum of Glyn in the afterlife to trick Lolth into thinking that Graz'zt has a secret child. The outer story is that this 'child of Graz'zt' wants to undertake a ritual, subdue weakened demons, and gain Graz'zt's favor. If Lolth uncovers that the 'fake demon' is Glyn, their plan will be thwarted. Thus, they must act swiftly before Lolth realizes that Graz'zt's spirit is on the material plane, beyond the reach of the Underdark.

Here are the layers of Glyn’s deception:

* Rule 1 - Glyn is a child of Graz’zt who is there on the material plane to have an orgy with sheep, goblins, and unicorns.
* Rule 2 -  Glyn is a child of Graz’zt who is there on the material plane to complete a ritual to help father.
* Rule 3 - Glyn is Glyn, who wants revenge on Nicholas Ice Cream, which is why he wants to do the ritual.
* Rule 4 - Glyn is Glyn, who wants revenge on Nicholas Ice Cream, so he can be captured, the family can keep their soul, and Graz’zt doesn’t have to deal with the repercussions.
* Rule 5 - The truth.

It’s okay to have extra rules -- they’re all excessive. He takes One-Ear and One-Ears’ trusted goblins.

Glyn, with his cover story set, goes to the Weal of the Blooded. They’re struggling to get through Tasha’s complex tomes to understand the empowered ritual, but they understand that Glyn must be 1) with Vizeran when it’s cast or 2) within the ritual’s circle with Graz’zt’s horn to take control of the ritual. They offer Glyn an invitation to a blood-tasting club.

Glyn goes to his goblin soldiers and sees One Ear is working his team to the bone, using the ‘weak ones’ sacrificed to Yeenoghu as motivation. Glyn floats behind One Ear, helping him frighten his armies. One Ear takes responsibility for the weaklings who couldn’t kill Yeenoghu. Glyn suggests a way to make it up to him - bringing One Ear and two others to the material plane--a wiry fighter named Sleack the Sleazy and a powerful simpleton named Bralg the Bold--to help vouch for Glyn before the goblins.

Glyn goes to Twinkleface. Twinkleface is being doped up on factory farming materials before he’s going to be slaughtered and eaten. Glyn takes Twinkleface outside of the butchery and then uses lay on hands to remove his poisons. Then, he manipulates a disoriented Twinkleface. He vomits up ashes and blood (the equivalent of high fructose corn syrup in Azzagrat).

They go into a trash receptacle and find the thrown-away horn (full of liquids and secretions). Twinkleface gives Glyn the honorary unicorn name of Moonlight Sparkle.

Glyn gets an instrument in Azzagrat for Pix (a drum, clearly made with flesh and a solid gold drum set).  He gets a really long riding crop and some rope and a hanging hook, which he converts into a fishing rod for Trix. He gets a history book for Bogtooth, a spellbook for Pyrite and a helmet used for imps when they transform for Squii.

Glyn, using divination, sees Pyrite deep in the Underdark, poring over Gromph's powerful grimoire, and senses that Trix is overcome with anger and determination, although he's not sure what's driving it.

Glyn ponders a suitable false identity for himself as they make their way through the surface. Miss Anna suggests "Merlot," and Glyn bids farewell to her and Suortin before seeking solace in a nearby praise cafe.

Glyn then turns to Twinkleface for advice, and the unicorn suggests they use a portal to travel back to the destroyed Crystal Lake grove before making their way to Dulcinea's grove. Along the way, they encounter an old friend of Twinkleface’s, Wendy the Weed, who survived the devastation of Crystal Lake. The weeds provide the party with directions to their destination.

## New NPCs

1. Sleack the Sleazy, wiry goblin warrior
2. Bralg the Bold, beefy goblin warrior
3. Wendy the Weed, survivor of the Crystal Lake Grove

## Memorable Quotes

* **ROT:** Father yelled at me.
* **Glyn:** You okay there, buddy?
* **ROT:** I am a Cambion. I am Lord Graz’zt’s blood. I want to make my father proud. Now that we are the same blood, I am sure you understand.

**ROT:** You need many layers of cover story. You need what any onlooker would believe you are doing, what those you speak with believe you are doing, and what you are actually doing. This way, even if Lolth can see you, her spiders cannot read your mind. It may be to your benefit to stage a denouement that is all artifice…it would be that you go to your friends, you say one thing, and they see past it. So you admit to “the truth” -- but there is a deeper truth. As I say--what you appear to be doing, the false denouement, and the real truth. That is the rule of three. But if you want even more layers, we’re all about excess.

* **Glyn:** He can kind of see through people.
* **ROT:** If you convince Trix of the truth--the truth that everything we did on the Infinite Battlefield was for the greater good, peeling goblins away from a life of becoming wisps, husks, and soulless shells--he will see that is true. And if you take your loyal goblins with you, they can explain it was for the best. Are there any others here who would be useful from an optical perspective?
* **Glyn:** There was a unicorn I met.
* **ROT:** I assume you met them in Samora?
* **Glyn:** Yeah.
* **ROT:** They are bred for their horns. The horns become toothpicks. The unicorn is eaten. We use the unicorn’s horn to remove the unicorn from our teeth.
* **Glyn:** What an efficient method.
* **ROT:** As they say, you have to use all parts of the unicorn.

* **ROT:** I have developed a rule of thumb--you might call it the fourth rule. Any time there is something inconsistent, it is Nicholas Ice Cream’s fault.
* **Glyn:** Probably is, fucker.
* **ROT:** He IS a fucker.

* **Glyn:** I imagine a mind flayer would be very tricky.
* **ROT:** Father is interested in a mind flayer.
* **Glyn:** I asked Grazilaxx, and I don’t think he’s interested. But he does have mind flayer friends.
* **ROT:** Enough darts on the board, and one hits the target.
* **Glyn:** It’s all a numbers game.
* **ROT:** I have often thought that, about consensual mind flayer intercourse.
* **Glyn:** Who hasn't?

* **Glyn**: Can’t wait ‘till I get to kill that piece of shit.
* **ROT:** That is far too generous.
* **Glyn:** Of course. Kill him, bring him back here, tie him up, cut his limb, dip him in acid, take him out, set him on fire, chop him up into little pieces, sew him back together again with a rusty needle--
* **ROT:** And then, we can start the torture!
* **Glyn:** Yeah! Once we give him the welcoming party, of course.

**ROT:** It may be that you have an orgy with sheeps’ entrails coming out of all relevant orifices--and some irrelevant ones!

* **Glyn:** I could take One-Ear. Not sure if he’s too important.
* **ROT:** He is a goblin.

* **ROT:** The original Rule of Three was to bind the fiends--lawful, neutral, and chaotic--under a simple premise. The enemy of my enemy will fight against my first enemy. It’s alright if they don’t see things our way. Intent doesn’t matter; in times of war, the impact does.
* **ROT:** I need to fetch more pails of lubricant.

* **Glyn:** Do you do anything besides read?
* **The Blooded:** We enjoy engaging in ritualistic sacrifices. Fresh bloods are our specialty. We have a blood club.
* **Glyn:** Where you try different bloods?
* **The Blooded: I**ndeed.
* **Glyn**: Are you accepting new members?
* **The Blooded:** If you wish to partake of our blood club, we’d be happy to have you.
* **Glyn:** Excellent. I got a taste for various meats when I was going through my transformation. I think that sounds like a wonderful way to spend an afternoon.

**One Ear:** What, do I have something on my face? Is there a second ear that you see? Well, I’m afraid I can’t hear you so well! Get back to work and let me hear you.

* **Glyn:** When we get to the material plane, it has to look like we’re having a crazy orgy.
* **Sleack the Sleazy:** I have three testicles.
* **Glyn:** Perfect. And you can’t refer to me as Lord Glyn.
* **Sleack the Sleazy:** Yes, Lord--aaaaah.
* **Glyn:** Can you refrain from calling me Lord Glyn?
* **Bralg the Bold:** Yes, my guy.
* **Sleack the Sleazy:** Yes, my guy.
* **One Ear:** Who volunteers to be interim general of this sorry lot? I’ll kill you if you don’t volunteer. Right! Now, fight to the death! The fittest shall survive.

* **Twinkleface: O**h, hi there!
* **Glyn:** Hi, Twinkleface.
* **Twinkleface:** Do we know each other? Are you with those nice people there? They say I get to eat as much as I want and I don’t have to be in that pen anymore.

* **Glyn:** You don’t deserve this kind of treatment. If I can help just one unicorn, it’ll make me feel better about myself.
* **Twinkleface:** This whole place is desecrated. It’s really bad! And there’s a fiend, sort of, around you?
* **Glyn:** They’ve done things to me here similar to what they’ve done to you. But it’s okay. There's’ a part of what I once was.
* **Twinkleface:** What were you, kind friend?
* **Glyn:** I was a goblin.
* **Twinkleface:** That’s awful.
* **Glyn:** I hope they find the horn they took from me.
* **Twinkleface:** Of course. A goblin with a horn. And I will give you one of the names of my people: by the power of the unicorns from the grove of Crystal Lake, I give you the honorary name of Moonlight Sparkle.

* **Shopkeep demon:** If you want a worse drum, that’s fine, but I’ll let you know that drum is made from freshly imported halfling flesh, every hour.
* **Glyn:** It’s not for me--lesser taste, I know.
* **Shopkeep demon:** Fine, whatever, I’ll give you this trash. I have to pawn this off on someone. [In reference to a solid gold drumset.]
* **Glyn:** How much?
* **Shopkeep demon:** I’ll pay you to get rid of this thing. It’s worthless.
* **Glyn:** Poor taste, I know.

* **Glyn:** When we’re on the material plane, I want you to refer to me as Merlot. I’m a child of Graz’zt.
* **Twinkleface:** You’re a child of Graz’zt?
* **Glyn:** That’s what we’re TELLING people.
* **Twinkleface:** Okay!
* **One Ear**: I would follow you forever, Lord--Merlot.

* **Twinkleface: I**’m glad that you’re here, Moonlight Sparkle.
* **One Ear:** His name is Merlot!

* **Wendy the Weed:** Has someone come here?
* **Twinkleface:** Who’s there?
* **Wendy the Weed:** It’s me, Wendy the Weed!
* **Twinkleface:** I’m so happy you’re okay.
* **Wendy the Weed:** What happened to your horn?
* **Twinkleface**: They did terrible things to me. They experimented on me. But I was saved by this hornless goblin--Moonlight Sparkle!
* **Wendy the Weed:** I didn’t think goblins had horns or were so tall.
* **Glyn:** Unfortunately, some things that happened to Twinkleface happened to me.
* **Wendy the Weed:** Well, I’m so sorry to hear that, my friend. But you know what they say--whenever a catastrophic event happens, it’s pretty good for weeds and crabgrass, so I've been doin’ okay--just growin’.

* **Glyn:** Sometimes in life, you surround yourself with people who aren’t good for you. But then you go around people who build you up and make you a better begin.
* **Twinkleface:** Yeah. I may have lost my horn, but I gained something else: perspective. I used to live in places where squirrels would put nuts in their mouths, and they’d comically shoot them out like a machine gun--it wouldn’t hurt, they’d all be fine--but for the laugh! That was the most violent thing I’d experienced until a demon of insanity came to my grove, killed everything I love, and turned my lake into an endless void.
* **Glyn:** Let’s stop it from happening to any other lakes.
* **Twinkleface:** We’re the good guys.
* **Glyn:** We’re the good guys.