Dark Knitting Hole

## A General Overview

Completely unknown as to how they came about, Dark Knitting Holes originate from The Bezos Killstreak, as they were a byproduct of the sun exploding. Dark knitting holes are large holes in the ground (commonly found in parking garages and Finn's backyard) that are inescapable once you enter them. they are usually 15-35 feet deep, and about 3-4 feet wide in diameter. Once you enter the hole, you are forced to knit. there will be a ball of yarn that will never run out, and 2 knitting needles, and are to be used for knitting. the hole walls are made of dirt, stone, and gravel, which are all completely indestructible and unable to move. anyone can fall into the Dark Knitting Hole, but on average the Dark Knitting Hole's victims are a type of person called a "Konlan".

## Knitting in the hole

In the Dark Knitting hole, there is always 2 tannish beige plastic knitting needles and a bundle of yarn, a dull crimson (specifically #a11b38). If someone were to try to use any of the items for non-knitting purposes, the materials will revert to the original state they were found in, even if it means undoing all prior knitting. The Konlan may knit as much as they want, and the items knit will disappear once the Konlan's attention is not on the completed project.

## Preservation of Man

Dark Knitting Holes will never let the Konlan die. The Konlan still suffers from hunger (never thirst), and will never be fed. although the hunger never becomes unbearable or shows any signs of effecting the body, but is more of just a nagging feeling to the Konlan. You cannot age in the Dark Knitting Hole, as time passes differently inside of it. the passage of time is no different than outside the hole, but since the Dark Knitting Hole has such an intense shitma force, you do not physically deteriorate whilst inside of it. It will keep you alive, but always in slight discomfort.

## Preservation of the Dark Knitting Hole

Dark Knitting Holes are completely and utterly indestructible, as the shitma force makes sure everything around it is in good condition. as shown to the right, the Dark Knitting Hole may be completely removed from the ground, but it will keep the surrounding ground mass with it, ergo making it indestructible. the only way to destroy a Dark Knitting Hole is to not, since you cannot destroy it. are you stupid? i JUST said you cant destroy it like 2 sentences ago!!! **KILL YOURSELF!!!!**

## The "Konlan"

Dark Knitting Holes are empty lonely things, until a Konlan approaches. the average person would walk away, but the Dark Knitting Hole attracts Konlans to it like moths to a flame. the Dark Knitting Hole itself does nothing to attract them, no silly mind stuff or anything, but the Konlan will still feel the urge to enter the Dark Knitting Hole and will mindlessly fling itself into it. When entering the Dark Knitting Hole, the Konlan's brain will begin to rattle in its head, making a very loud noise (close to 78 decibels).

In the Dark Knitting Hole, there may only be 1 Konlan at a time. The Dark Knitting Hole will accept only one at a time, and when someone falls into the hole while there is a Konlan in it, the Dark Knitting Hole will free the first Konlan and capture the new one. "But wait! wouldn't the Konlan just make a bunch of noise, attracting others like it into the hole to free itself?", you might ask yourself. this is not possible, as the Dark Knitting Hole is completely soundproof, allowing no sound to enter or exit the Dark Knitting Hole. The Konlan is not smart enough to figure out this plan, as he spend most of his time complying with the Dark Knitting Hole's rules.

When a regular person falls into a Dark Knitting Hole, often times they will become very bored and freak out from self-isolation. this begins the process of the Dark Knitting Hole Mental Regression, where the victim of a Dark Knitting Hole starts to turn into a Konlan. The shitma force will try to keep the victim as they were, as it keeps all things the way they originally were, but the person will slowly regress into a Konlan.

The first part of transforming into a Konlan is the regression of the lip skin. The Konlan is infamous for it's large and scary smile, as you can see in the image on the right. the next stage is your nose will get much bigger and turn maroon. the last and final stage is your neck will become very contorted, your Adam's apple will grow much larger despite sounding exactly the same as before it was larger, and your chin will become a lot more extenuated.

## The Exploitations of the Dark Knitting Holes by Amazon

Dark Knitting Holes have potential for incredibly amounts of energy, as discovered by Evon Goldman. He discovered that when a Konlan is throw into a Dark Knitting Hole whilst there is already one in there, he can harness the audio energy of the Konlan entering and exiting the hole. by hooking up large amounts of microphones around a Dark Knitting Hole, Evon Goldman created at least 6 oingowatts per drop. this made him lots of money, and now he's very happy (since he has a lot of money (from which he acquired by harnessing the audio energy of throwing a Konlan in a Dark Knitting Hole)).

Dark Knitting Holes