Alex's Price is Right/Episode 912

> Well, hello there, fans, and welcome to a very, very, VERY special episode of *Alex's Price is Right*, where today, we're doing inventory!
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> Yes, today, we're taking stock of the prizes we've got so that we can accurately determine the prizes we need to re-order, and to help us do that, we've hired this wonderful company that I work for called RGIS, LLC! They will take their scanners and count all the prizes we have in this warehouse, and report 'em back to me! Won't that be fun?
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> Well, thank you guys for showing up. Remember, accuracy is our top priority, so always remember to count after yourselves when you finish an area, and don't forget to call for a SKU check if you need it! If you mess up too much, you'll be sent home.
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> *(cocks gun)* ...Of course, being sent home will be far preferable to what'll happen to you if you actually make it to the end of this episode! *(makes a wicked grin and laughs evilly)*
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> Alex before the episode, setting the tone...
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This article is a recap of **Episode 912** of *Alex's Price is Right*, a "fuck you" episode against RGIS, the company Alex had just quit after a particularly stressful three-month stint with them.

## Summary

The prize/prop destruction counter appears on this episode, a rare instance of a non-April Fool's episode with it. The Price is Right Clock on the Wall also appears; its presence, and the fact that it advanced 4 hours and 30 minutes from start to finish (implying that it took that long to produce a 1-hour episode that usually runs close to airtime...), acts as a running gag throughout the episode.

A secondary running gag is "Hood Rat", the supervisor, an incredibly bitchy, pregnant woman based on one of Alex's own supervisors at the time.

The destruction count:

1. During the first IUFB, Alene Keshishian throws her podium at a RGIS guy who kept calling for a SKU check while she was describing it.
2. Alene slams Hood Rat to the floor during the third IUFB, destroying the Basket...
3. ...her glasses...
4. ...and possibly making her have a miscarriage.
5. Flip Flop's ARP reveal is missing, resulting in Alex needing an offstage price reveal.
6. The sixth IUFB was originally a Mei costume, but Alene abuses the RGIS employee who looks like Meghan Trainor and was modeling it, destroying the costume...
7. ...and apparently the model's orgasm, as she was getting off to it or some other fat fetishism-related porn. The IUFB is then replaced with a treadmill.

### Game results

* Take Two is played for a Hyundai Elantra, Toyota Yaris, Kia Soul, and Honda HR-V. The contestant wins on her second try, with the Honda and Kia, which totals the target price of $44,846. Combined with her IUFB, a "closet" of designer clothes with 10 pairs each of gloves and boots, she wins $92,087 total. The Toyota Yaris needed a SKU check; it's unclear how its price was determined. It apparently took 20 minutes just to do the IUFB and an hour just to do this segment in total.
* ½ Off, with its new blue set from the real show, is played by EllingtonSisters4Lyfe. She flames out completely, leaving up all 16 boxes due to getting none of the small prize pairs right. Her IUFB was leather BDSM stuff worth $3,414, that a RGIS employee was "batching", which is against the rules. Hood Rat then tried to send the girl scanning the small prizes home for a "dress code violation" because she was wearing flat-heeled overknee boots, which caused both Alene and the audience to retaliate against her, the latter by throwing debris onto the stage. Elapsed time: 1 hour 42 minutes.

> **HEY!!!** Fuck off, cunt!!! That's your best scanner and you're sending her home over the stupidest fucking bullshit ever...what's wrong, jealous!?!
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> Alene Keshishian
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* Flip Flop is played by ThirtyOne for a trip to Cincinnati. Door #4 is clearly marked "DO NOT INVENTORY", but some RGIS guy tries to scan it anyway. ThirtyOne wins by flip-flopping. Combined with her IUFB, two diamond rings, she wins $9,494 total. Elapsed time: 2.5 hours.

> **Alene:** *(pointing to the blank area tag on the diamond rings)* ...And why in the fuck has this not been scanned yet!?!
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> **Hood Rat:** Oh, the guy who was supposed to do that got sent to a Kroger in San Francisco!
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> **Alene:** **KROGER DOESN'T EVEN FUCKING *EXIST* IN SAN FRANCISCO, OR ANYWHERE ON THE WEST COAST, YOU FUCKING MORON!!!**
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> **Hood Rat:** Well, the woman who wanted him there, some white chick named Anita with a plaid shirt, was pretty adamant that it was a Kroger!
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* EllingtonSisters4Lyfe, who spins first, wins Showcase Showdown 1 with 90¢.
* Temptation is played by Ellinika for a BMW 330i GT ///M Sport Edition. She takes the prizes: an "Alex's 30th Birthday" ring, Peebles/Goody's clothes, Dick's Sporting Goods hunting rifles, Dillard's men's plaid shirts, and the Fishbowl of Cash™. Combined with her IUFB, Cabela's sporting goods, she wins $27,502 total. These prizes all came from the companies that Alex did inventory for. Elapsed time: 3 hours, 6 minutes.
* Cliff Hangers is played by CaliGirl01 for a tennis court. She wins by keeping Hood Rat, the mountain climber, on Step 18, with a perfect bid on the last small prize. Combined with her IUFB, a tennis machine (that keeps hitting a RGIS guy in his balls...) with rackets, she wins $11,748 total. Elapsed taping time: 3 hours, 42 minutes.
* Telephone Game 2, with its new "smartphone" set and slightly tweaked rules for the grocery item part, is played by AAML4Ever for trips to Barboursville WV, Richmond, and Roanoke. She takes three guesses to determine that Krusteaz pie mix is $4.49, and fails to dial the Barboursville trip. Her IUFB was a treadmill worth $919...as noted above, however, it was going to be a costume of Mei from *Overwatch*, until Alene took exception. Elapsed taping time: 4 hours 12 minutes.

> FUCKING FATTIES, I SWEAR!!! HAVING SOMEONE LIKE *HER* IN *OVERWATCH* WAS A MISTAKE!!!
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> Alene
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* CaliGirl01, who spins second, wins Showcase Showdown 2 with 75¢.
* A double overbid happens in the Showcase round.
* $145,164 was won among all six onstage contestants, with three games won.

1. ↑ Food 4 Less/Foods Co., a Kroger SUBSIDIARY, may exist in Frisco. But since when did hood rats ever think about shit like this?