The Truth Behind the Bots, or Major's Most Unfortunate Venture

By fffffplayer1

Originally posted on 10-26-2014

**The Truth Behind the Bots**

**or**

**Major's Most Unfortunate Venture**

               Some might be wondering where the Barney Bots came from! It certainly was a surprising event for the Knights of the Olde Speech when they suddenly met an army of Barney Bots, especially having already smashed Barney. But the truth is that it didn’t really happen suddenly. That’s what Major Q the 10th Hero learnt in one of his adventures during the reign of thedude.

               “We discovered a new cavern in Mount Servus!” Tolkien Fan Axe reported to Major.

               “We want to go explore it!” Quite Bad Muffin added.

               Major examined them. They hadn’t really voted for a leader, but as time passed it became apparent that Major was treated by the others as one. It was logical, for he had the skills.

               Major used to be a Nexus Force Commando, one of the Elite soldiers against the Maelstrom. And he was indeed one of the most renowned minifigures among the Nexus Forcers. That was why the Knights had thought of asking help from him; that and that some of them knew him personally. However, all that had changed when Major became stranded on the Knight’s Kingdom, a planet that never moved on from the Medieval Times.

               Major had helped the Knights of the Olde Speech in the war against thedude and he actually didn’t expect their enemy to be so successful. When the Elephanters’ Battle was lost and the Knights fled, they still had some hope. Nexus Force was still coming. But when soon the first spaceships arrived, a surprise awaited them. A squadron of Barney-fighters, barney-shaped starfighters piloted by Barney Bots appeared. The first spaceship was utterly destroyed and the second was damaged enough to fall to the ground. The rest of the Nexus Force fleet retreated as soon as they saw what happened to the two spaceships by a mere squadron of starfighters. They weren’t ready to defeat them, not with too many losses at least.

               The Nexus Force still considered thedude as a threat, so they blockaded the planet, but left the Knight’s Kingdom to the hands of thedude. In four years, many lands had fallen to his greedy hands. Morcia was the first to fall, after the Knights’ failure. The Aquilones’ Kingdom had collapsed due to the civil war thedude caused that enabling him to conquer them, too. The Kingdoms of the Easterlings’ Kingdoms and the lands between them and Morcia were not excluded from thedude’s conquest. The Elephanters and Britay, the island land at the West, were still fighting, but thedude’s force had become far too powerful.

               The fallen spaceship of the Nexus Force had remained where it had fallen. thedude had not touched it, because it reminded people of his power. And there stranded it still lay four years later. And would suspect the simple starship. It was wrecked, destroyed, useless; why would anyone search it? And that was why Major and some others were still living there four years after the Elephanters’ Battle.

               “There is something you are not telling me!” Major deduced.

               The two minifigures seemed hesitant.

               “We saw some Paradox Rogues near it!” Axe finally told him .

               “Paradox Rogues?! Well, that’s odd! The renegades have become quite a small part of thedude’s gigantic army. He is using them only for his most important jobs. I literally have years to see one!” Major commented.

               “Well… can we go?” Muffin asked.

               “Definitely not! The Rogues can’t have been there for no reason! There must be something in there! I do know we should explore the cavern, but I can’t risk your lives! I’ll go!”

               “No! Major, you can’t go alone! There’s no way you’re returning from that place!” Muffin exclaimed worriedly.

               “Please, I am elite! I think I can cope with some Paradox Rogues or even a Red Mythran! What worse could be there? Besides, have I ever been defeated?” Major replied.

               Axe got ready to speak, but Major cast him a very serious, almost deadly look and said “End of discussion!”

               The hike to the spot of Mount Servus where his two friends had found the cavern was easy nor restful. No wonder they didn’t find it before in the four years they passed exploring the area around the ship. However, Major finally reached the cavern at the late morning of the next day from his conversation with Axe and Muffin. He didn’t see anyone around, but he was sure someone would soon appear, so he quickly got inside the opening in the wall of rock that nature had built. The cavern indeed seemed small and got dark soon after entering it. Major continued walking despite all that and the fact it was getting more and more strait. And when after some time, the narrow passage opened up, Major realised this was no cavern. It was a gigantic cave! And what a cave it was? Inside that huge place where Major could barely see the ceiling and didn’t see at all the wall where it stopped, thedude had built his factory where Barney Bots and Barney-Fighters were built.

               Seeing that, Major gasped. And his gasp was heard. Soon three Paradox Rogues were running for him. Two of them were smashed by a single launch of an arrow. The third managed to reach him, but Major used his momentum and making some particular move with which he sort of pushed the man upwards, the minifigure jettisoned away hitting on the wall. More Renegades, accompanied by many simple soldiers, approached from the interior of the cave. With his arms “being on fire” many fell from his arrows and as in the end some of them came close, he drew his greatsword. Unfortunately, he had long lost his old weapons, which would have been even more helpful. He avoided the fire of a Wormholer and sliced against the first to arrive. His pieces fell onto the next on line, who had the same fate as the first. The third person gave a fight, but was smashed, too. By that time, four more people had arrived and there were three Space Marauders and two Sorcerers firing from afar.

               Major retreated back to the narrow entrance, so that he would force his enemies to fight him one by one instead of all together. Meanwhile, he put his left hand into his pocket and found only a little piece of paper. He threw it on the floor and searched for something inside his backpack. He found a firecracker, which still remained from the time when he still could buy supplies from the Nexus Force. He threw it at the crowd of ranged-weapon-yielding minifigures, which had grown in that time. The firecracker, however, was problematic and only smashed one or two of them, hurting few others.

               Major was doing quite well and fought for a long enough time. However, the battle of Thermopylae was repeated when some Paradox Rogues appeared from behind him. There must have been another entrance or a secret passage. Luckily, Major heard them before they arrived. Thus, he kicked the one in front of him at the moment causing a domino effect. The strait passage did not allow easy turning, so he preferred being surrounded by all sides to being trapped there. With the enemies having gone a bit further, Major managed to get out.

               There, he fought for some more time, but with much more difficulty and he was hurt multiple times. Then, a Red Mythran appeared. For some reason they behaved like a video game having waves of enemies that became more and more difficult instead of bringing the tough stuff from the beginning. A bolt of red electricity was conjured by the Mythran. Major dodged it and it hit some other minifigures. Major strode towards the Mythran, but he also conjured a Fire Ball. The minifigure avoided that, too, and smashing through some Shinobi, he reached the Mythran, who was creating a Ball of red Electricity between his hands. Major poked him with his sword before he could send that attack. Instead of the Mythran smashing, Major felt electricity running through him. He fell down in pain, letting go of his sword. In a last attempt to protect himself, Major grabbed an arrow of his and jumped back up. This time, though, he attacked on the spot of the Mythran that looked like a red Imagination Orb. The Mythran was stunned for a second and then exploded, sending Major flying away. Yet, two Barney Bots appeared then.

               “Well, I guess I won’t get to finish Crux Origins!” Major told himself as he grabbed someone’s axe that had fallen down.

               He charged for the Bots, but they immediately shot the axe out of his hand and immobilized him by grabbing tightly both of his arms. The battle was lost. Major now expected his ill fate. The two Barney Bots forced him to walk towards some place. Most of the other soldiers followed laughing at him, swearing and making many foul remarks. The Barney Bots led him to a dark and pretty narrow side of the cave.

               “Well well well!” a voice oddly familiar said, as they forced him to his knees in front of some darkness.

               Someone walked towards them and Major saw two eyes shining evilly in the dark. As the person kept walking, his pink/purple figure appeared from the dark.

               “Why are you fighting us? We should all be friends!”

               Major screamed in agony as he realised he was looking upon the diabolically stupid Barney the Dinosaur. . .

\*\*\*---\*\*\*

               Axe and Muffin walked inside the narrow tunnel leading to the enormous cave-factory. They were too worried for Major. They weren’t going to sit back, while he smashed himself! They were going to help him, no matter what he said. They reached the entrance to the cave. The pieces of many fallen Rogues were still there.

               In the light of a torch, they surveyed the hints of the battle. Luckily, there was no one around to see them.

               “He certainly gave a good fight, but something tells me the battle ended not favouring him!” Muffin commented.

               “Wait! Light over there! I think I saw something!” Axe said.

               Muffin pointed the torch towards the direction Axe showed him. There was indeed something yellowish over there, half-buried by the fallen Rogues and their weapons. Axe picked it up. It was a piece of parchment. The letters of Major were written on it with ink:

               “Axe and Muffin, if you are reading this, it means I’ve either been caught or smashed and you disobeyed me by following me! In this case, do not do the foolish thing trying to save me, but desert immediately, together with the others, before they find you! Goodbye and Good Luck! Major!”

               “What are we gonna do?” Muffin asked.

               “You go tell the others and leave together! I’ll stay here and try to save Major, if he’s still alive!” Axe replied.

               “No way! I want to come, too!”

               “Well, then, go and return, so that we try together!”

               “Okay!”

               And so Muffin turned around and left to warn the others, while Axe stayed to make sure they kept track of Major’s location.

\*\*\*---\*\*\*

               Major Q the 10th Hero was tied on a chair and Barney the Dinosaur was looking at him, thinking on how to make him speak.

               “We should all be friends! Why don’t you tell me where your friends are, so I can befriend them, too?” Barney said.

               “I have no friends with me! I was alone!” Major responded.

               “Why do you lie to me? We should all be friends! You couldn’t have survived four years on your own! Besides, these four years, there have been multiple reports of soldiers going missing in this general area! You couldn’t have taken them all on your own!”

               “I’m quite good at fighting!”

               “Yet, our reports say that four years ago, you left Elepharia with company! You shouldn’t lie, we should all be friends!”

               “If you are my friend, tell me that: How can you be alive when I smashed you four years ago?”

               By the way, have I told you that four years have passed since Perpetual Doom?

               “I shall tell you, because we are friends! You see when the Knights of the Olde Speech started fighting us, thedude noticed that he was losing men quickly! He didn’t know how long this war would last, so he was worried he would run out of Paradox Rogues. That’s why he prepared the design of the Barney Bots, which would replace his army if needed. Soon, he had even made a prototype Barney Bot, which was designed to act and look exactly like me, not showing it was a Bot! It was that that you smashed! Meanwhile, I had been sent here to massively produce Barney Bots. This is what you met in Elepharia! Yet, our plans have grown bigger! We created the Barney Fighters and are still preparing our secret weapon, the BSS Barney! But now you must tell me what I ask, because I answered your question! We should all be friends!”

               “Well, you might be my friend, but I am not your friend! I will say nothing!” Major answered.

               “Very well! Commence the torturing! If you don’t want to be my friend, I will make you!” Barney said being creepier than ever.

               And as Barney turned around to leave, the two Barney Bots, which were previously guarding the door, approached Major evilly.

\*\*\*---\*\*\*

               Muffin didn’t stop running until he reached the crashed spaceship. In one room, he found the rest of the team chatting. When it all had began there were Major, Axe, Muffin, two Knights and ten crashed Nexus-Forcers who had survived the fall of their ship. Now, there were only four of them remaining. As Muffin entered the room, they all turned to look at him.

               “Where are the others?” Sir Loin of Beef asked.

               “Major was captured or smashed and Axe is keeping an eye on them!” Muffin responded catching his breath.

               “We must help him, if he’s still alive!” Sir Squid exclaimed and the others agreed.

               “We found a note from Major! He asked us to leave and save ourselves! You should go, but Axe and I will try to save him or restore his pieces to save his honour!”

               “Why should it only be you?” Normm, a Sentinel Samurai questioned him “We want to help, too!”

               “This is more of a stealth job, we can’t all go! It’s a huge place and it must be very well guarded. Now, please, don’t argue! We don’t have a lot of time before they find us! Save yourselves!”

               And Muffin left, not leaving them time to argue any more. As he reached the mountain and started his ascent again, he saw Axe climbing down towards him.

               “Major is alive!” he exclaimed long before he reached Muffin “I saw them moving him inside a cage! I don’t where they are taking him, but it’s not long since they left! We can reach them in time!”

               By that time, Axe and Muffin had reached each other.

               “Let’s go then!” Muffin responded.

               And so the two minifigures set for their very dangerous adventure to save Major. Together they went, destined to meet more dangers than they suspected; destined to try an impossible task. . .

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