Newport bridge bombings

"*I can't believe anyone would want to do this.*"
—lonellamaMV
The **Newport bridge bombings** were a series of coordinated terrorist attacks led by the pro-democracy terrorist group URINAL CAKES in Downtown Newport on May 25, 2021 (Day 5, Year 63 AK). The bombings resulted in the destruction of 10 bridges in and around Downtown Newport and some damage to nearby buildings, including the partial collapse of a wall at the Server Federation Embassy. The Newport bridge bombings were in retaliation for Newportian Emperor lonellamaMV's refusal to resign, as demanded by URINAL CAKES earlier that day.

In response to the attacks, Emperor lonellamaMV issued Imperial Edict XXXVIII, declaring five involved players terrorists and banning them from the Newportian Empire. The bombings prompted the Server Federation to issue a travel warning for the Empire the next day, citing "politically-charged violence".

## Background

The United Revolutionary Insurgency for Newportian Autonomous Liberation, Courtesy of the Allied Kratocratic Enforcers of Self-government (URINAL CAKES) was founded by ratatoing8990 and three other anonymous players on May 24, 2021 (63:4), with the goal of overthrowing the Imperial government of the Newportian Empire and restoring democracy. On the morning of May 25 (63:5), URINAL CAKES released a video demanding the resignation of Emperor lonellamaMV before midnight, threatening "drastic measures" if the Emperor refused. The ultimatum was broadcast on two of the three major Newportian news networks: *The Newport Report* at 10:16 am, and BuzzPort at 10:50 am. Both networks later reported that they had been hacked by URINAL CAKES. The state-run Channel 1 Newport News was apparently unaffected.

Emperor lonellamaMV did not publicly respond to the terrorists' ultimatum until 11:41 pm, when he released a statement refusing to yield to URINAL CAKES' demand and denouncing democratic systems of government. "I am a leader who stands for the people," he said. "I try my best to make this Empire the best it can be for you. How can I continue to do that if I meet your demand? I could never sit on the side lines and watch my nation be taken from me. I will not yield."

## Bombings

   According to *The Newport Report*, explosions were reported "mere minutes" after Emperor lonellamaMV rejected URINAL CAKES' ultimatum. At approximately 11:45 pm, insurgents bombed the Avocado Street and Coastal Highway bridges connecting Downtown Newport to Oldtown. These were followed by explosions at the Conch Street bridge, the south and north Crusty Oceans Avenue bridges, Panakin Bridge, and the Newport Metro line in rapid succession. Minutes later, bombings were reported at the bridges on Empire Street, Founder's Way, and Delta Street. The bombings ended at approximately midnight.

Amidst the unrest, URINAL CAKES was reportedly joined in their efforts by non-terrorist civilians, some of whom participated in detonating TNT. Emperor lonellamaMV was also present for the bridge bombings, mainly to take pictures as evidence against the suspected terrorists. Shortly after the bombing of the Empire Street bridge, lonellamaMV allegedly assaulted insurgent fighter isaacr4760. The Emperor then fled south to Oldtown, as he was pursued by isaacr4760 and other terrorists and civilian allies. The chase ended with a standoff on the front lawn of lostcity99's house on Lonti Street.

Scattered damage was later observed on structures near the bridges. The bombing at the Founder's Way bridge damaged the west wall of the nearby Server Federation Embassy, while the explosion at the Avocado Street bridge damaged a private marina owned by undrcovravocado. In total, 10 bridges were destroyed during the attacks. No fatalities were reported.

## Aftermath

   At 12:18 am on May 26 (64:1), Emperor lonellamaMV issued Imperial Edict XXXVIII in response to the Newport bridge bombings, which declared ratatoing8990, isaacr4760, crista7777, SlammerDoc, and Mak Mini as terrorists for their actions and exiled them from the Empire. The edict also mentioned IITheRecyclerII, stating that her actions are "pending investigation". Some of the terrorists reportedly fled south to Federate Blartsburg after Edict XXXVIII was enacted.

BuzzPort reporter IITheRecyclerII briefly followed lonellamaMV shortly after the bombings. She later wrote that he "began breaking down any remaining TNT left on the streets, then solemnly wandered towards a destroyed bridge, disposing of the TNT into the nearby river. Afterwards, the man could be seen gazing around the old Council Building." He also left a sign at the edge of the collapsed Panakin Bridge, which read, "When the actions of some affect us all, choose peace". In a brief interview with BuzzPort, the Emperor stated that he was "deeply sad, and angry". When asked if he was nervous about URINAL CAKES' next move, he said, "No. The Empire is strong enough to stand it. I just hope they can see the error of their ways. May the Conch grant them peace."

On the afternoon of May 26 (64:1), Server Federation President ratatoing8990 issued a travel warning for the Newportian Empire in response to the attacks: "Due to politically-charged violence in the country, Federate citizens living or working in the Empire are advised to evacuate immediately if at all possible. Alternatively, citizens are urged to avoid urban centers, especially Downtown Newport, until further notice."