ID Chapter 16

# Chapter Sixteen - "An Unexpected Confession"

    "We did amazing!"

    "I couldn't be prouder of everyone!"

    Even backstage in the green room with the doors closed, the applause of the audience was practically drowning us out. Even if we shouted to each other, our voices sounded barely above a calm, intimate chat. The audience loved us. There's really no other way to say it. The start of the concert was a little shaky. Once Eimi performed the first number, it was a little tough getting them hyped up over the rest of us. But by intermission they had started to liven up - Dam-Bi really won them over with her energy - and after that Eimi worked the crowd into a frenzy. And then our big song debut was pretty much perfect. Which is why each and every one of us is currently over the moon with excitement.

    "You did great!" "You were perfect!" While this was a special night for all of us, it was possible that it was most special for the two girls for whom this was their first debut. They excitedly hugged each other, then clasped both hands and bounced around in a small circle, Kanon for once showing just as much energy as her best friend. I borrowed a move straight out of Rinko's playbook, rushing them and squishing them together in a group hug as they both laughed.

    "You both did wonderful out there. Congratulations on surviving your debut."

    Everything in the room became a hurricane of activity as nobody could sit still, or even wanted to try. I'm pretty sure that everyone hugged everyone else at least five times - even Eimi - and none of us even hurried to take off our costumes or makeup. That, to me, was the indication that even though we couldn't be entirely sure of the audience's opinion of us - not to mention the critics and reviewers who had yet to publish their impressions - I was certain that we all felt we had given it our all out on stage. In the past, when Rinko and I performed for audiences far less energetic than tonight's, often the very first thing we had wanted to do was shed everything that reminded us of what had just happened. Tonight it seemed almost the opposite - as soon as we returned back to our normal selves it would mean the experience was over, and none of us seemed in a hurry for that to happen.

    The only thing weighing on my mind - indeed, the only reason I had to possibly want this magical moment to end - were words that had gone unspoken earlier in the afternoon. Retreating away from my celebratory group mates, I fetched a bottle of water and downed half of it in a single series of gulps. If I'd known what was going to be said to me - even if I was sure it wasn't anywhere near the same context in which I could have uttered those same words - I may have been able to keep my composure and say something back to her. Or maybe if those thoughts hadn't already been weighing so heavily on my mind thanks to my rather unexpected conversation with Kanon. Or, there's a depressing possibility that even if I had been as prepared for that as I was for tonight's performance that I would have still done absolutely nothing differently and just stood there red-faced and tongue-tied, all because of those few tiny words..

    "Junko! I love you!"

    Those few tiny words which I felt even less ready to hear right this moment than I had been earlier. So much so that it took a moment for me to register what exactly I had even just heard, confirm that it had indeed happened outside of my head, and took even longer to look for their source. My first instinct was to locate the person whom I'd most like them to have come from, which I did easily. At some point in the last few minutes, while I had been lost in my own thoughts, quite a few unfamiliar faces had entered the room and the rest of the girls were posing for pictures and signing autographs. VIP ticket holders. Rinko was posing back to back with Eimi - of course it was with Eimi - in the far corner of the room as a few young girls stood around them smiling for a photo. A ways away Kanon and Chiyo were huddled together with a group of girls who couldn't be much older than they are, and it was obvious from the squeals of delight who the fuzzy little star of that show was. Lastly, but closest to me, only a few steps away were the last of my group mates standing with a few girls wearing the uniform of a local school. It was one of these who, guessing by the bright pink blush covering her entire face, was probably the source of the unexpected confession.

    Not a confession of real, true love, but that of a fan. The same way that you may say you love a movie or a candy or any other product meant for consumption. In other words, a type of love, yes, but not the sort I had been at all hoping to find. Still, it is nice to think that I actually have real fans now… I joined my two group mates, trying my best to look excited but not embarrassed by this newfound adoration.

    "Juney! Do you remember my friends from Starsphere? They made sure to come and support us tonight and wanted to congratulate us!"

    The friends in question were a trio of girls in, more or less, their school uniforms. One of them I did actually remember from a few previous encounters. Her long silver hair and slightly frosty look were quite lovely, and we had had an extremely unusual encounter in the doorway of my dorm room not long ago. Dam-Bi could barely stop hugging her over and over, and Tae-Eun - I'm fairly sure that was her name - seemed to oscillate between being rather ok with and rather annoyed by it. Another of them - a tall, long haired brunette in thin wireframe glasses - I had absolutely no recollection of. She seemed pretty much as I would expect a fan to be backstage at a concert. Obviously excited from the show, but not overly so, and rapidly exchanging an overly technical analysis of our performance with Megumi. The remaining girl was slightly familiar, though it wasn't until I focused on her brightly colored pullover that I remembered where I had seen her before: Eimi's concert, right before I snuck off backstage.

    "This is my bestie Tae-Eun! She's usually dressed way nicer than this, but isn't she great?!"

    "Hey, I'm being polite! I didn't want to show you up at your own concert. I expect you'll show the same courtesy when we debut, too."

    "See? She's great! Oh yeah, they're forming an idol group too and I told them we'd come see them sometime! And this is Mariya! This is my first time meeting her but she's great too! She's a new idol as well!" The girl, looking slightly amused at the introduction, waved in acknowledgement. "And this right here is her roommate Ai. Tae-Tae says that she's your biggest fan!"

    "She is *literally* the president of your fan club. You're her kamioshi. She practically fainted the moment you went on stage. She's kind of pathetic, but she means well."

    Dam-Bi's bestie hyped up the girl, sort of, and pushed her toward me. She looked extremely nervous, her pleasant green eyes darting between looking me up and down and glancing every which way around the room. A lot about her seemed fairly average. She was a pretty average height for a girl, and had a typical, slender build for a girl our age - especially if she's an idol like Dam-Bi implied. Her ginger hair was cut just above her shoulder - not too short like Kanon's or too long like Megumi's. If the thought weren't such an odd one to have, I would possibly describe her as "Rinko-esque", which I would define in this case as a girl possessing many qualities that are, on their own, perhaps unremarkable or average, but which when taken all together create someone very much cuter than the sum of their parts.

    "Ai? Hello, I'm Junko. Thank you for coming to see us tonight." I offered my hand to the girl, who stared at it in shock before clasping it with both hands and shaking nervously. "You're really the head of my fan club?" The girl shook her head up and down. I laughed despite my best attempts not to. The way she was completely awestruck - somehow over *me* - was just too cute. "I didn't even know I had a fan club."

    The nicer I tried to be, and the friendlier I smiled, the more interesting a shade Ai took on.

    "I love you!" Once she worked up the nerve to speak, it was the phrase I was still completely unready to hear, and I was certain that it showed on my face. I had never expected my first fan to be quite like this, and the sheer flattery was making my cheeks and the tips of my ears tingle. I thought hard to think of what I should say in reply. I remembered the last time I had been backstage after a concert, and though the entire event had been horrendous, there was one thing my future group mate had said that I thought was a particularly nice line.

    "Well, I'm glad to have such a cute fan as you." The line may have been slightly too powerful for this situation, as I'm pretty sure the only thing that kept the girl upright was the helping hands of our Korean friends. I'd never had this sort of power before. I'd never known that this sort of power actually existed outside of soap operas and anime. But I have to admit it is slightly thrilling…

    Once she recovered from this and opened her mouth once more, the trend of not hearing what I was expecting continued. Instead of a soft, nervous, pleasant voice like before, she sounded almost exactly like Lina.

    "Thank you everyone for coming tonight, but I'm afraid the girls really must get changed and packed! Get out of here now before I have to get nasty!" Or, Lina was simply yelling from the doorway over whatever everyone else in the room was saying. That made *A LOT* more sense. "Oh, right. Please!"

    Ai had to be practically dragged away by her friends, who met up with two other girls on the way out of the room who were excitedly waving autographed pictures to and fro. Right before she left the doorway our eyes met one more time - I had, for some reason, been watching my first, biggest, and cutest fan the entire way - and I instinctively winked. Just to see what sort of reaction I would get…

    The stupid grin she made was yet another thing I wouldn't easily forget about this night.

    "Junko… Juuunko!"

    "Hm? What? Sorry?"

    "Come on, we've gotta get changed!"

    "Oh, Rinko, right. I'll be there in just a sec…"

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