Haha! You Have To Goto the Barbershop and Get Treated Like Shit By Weekday and JC Smith Jr. Faceson!

### Theme

Anger, Death, Disdain, Enemy of my Enemy is my friend, Family, Forgiveness, Ignoring Negativity, Masturbation, Poor Customer Service, Revenge, Self-Parody, The Past

### Antagonists

- JC Smith Jr. Faceson
- Scottie Pepperman
- Weekday Faceson

### Locations

Callate Mexican Goddesses Grill, Chop Bastards Barbershop Ableist Rd., Memorial Service

### Writer/Artist

Khaliq Trevor X

***Haha! You Have To Goto the Barbershop and Get Treated Like Shit By Weekday and JC Smith Jr. Faceson!*** Is a story appearing in *the Rage Knights: Red God* universe and a part of Unwine’s Haha Tales created and written by Khaliq Trevor X.

## Synopsis

Following the death of another family member, Damon Bradley is forced to go back to Chop Bastards Barbershop on Ableist Rd. for a haircut. Upon entering, Weekday and JC Smith  Jr. Faceson begin dancing like Kerdur Rainer. Bradley ignores them and takes a seat while he waits. Meanwhile, the two barbers hiss in Agamantillian language and contemplate devouring Bradley like an insect. JC Smith Jr. Prays to the images of various Rage Knight villains such as Kaozu, Krom, Yr’eve, Professor Butch, Lenora Hunt, Colorism Director, Lactose, and Draya Freeman among many others as he prepares to lunge at Bradley and eat him.

Just as the burly barber who looks like a 2005 hip hop reject attacks, Bradley turns into a doll. JC tears into the doll and realizes along with Weekday that this is perhaps one of Bradley’s infamous Hell Clones or a projection from Daniel Goldberg’s camera gun. Furious, JC leaves the barbershop and goes to Callate Mexican Goddesses Grill and demands the employees lure Bradley into their store so he can be picked on, called “ugly guy nobody likes” and reduced to a mere meal fit for two lizard barbers.

The beautiful young dark skinned woman named Scottie Pepperman, refuses to help them recounting a time when Bradley entered and only purchased a soft drink. She tried to summon Emmanoggin and have the heavyset forehead blessed young woman attack him, but she was ultimately defeated. Angry over their refusal to help, JC smashes the walls and attacks the restaurant’s workers, customers and food. A pig squealing Scottie farts bagpipes and plays them to summon the East Sided Ugly-Killer. A beast Diseased skilled in defeating not only Damon Bradley clones, but also in other foolish entities whom threaten their summoners or themselves.

The creature is pummeled by JC’s rage but it soon picks up the large barber and runs him to Ivory Lincoln’s house where they find the attractive young woman masturbating to the thought of Bradley’s uncle now being deceased. JC screams and begs Ivory to send him to Damon Bradley to personally pick on him.

After hearing his pleas, Ivory touches his forehead and transports him and even Weekday, Scottie and a bunch of framed portraits of random Rage Knights RedGod enemies to the memorial service for Mick Vigor Dunn. Once there, JC and Weekday become giddy, ready to lay into Bradley’s looks and make him feel small, even at Mick’s funeral. Bradley turns to Hugo Hutchins, his aunts, cousins and dementia-riddled grandmother, Queen Nanny Dunn. Using presumed negativity as a source, Bradley approaches them and mentions how he used Frank Dunn’s 401k and Life insurance policies to defeat Draya Freeman, Lenora Hunt and every person who picked on him at a grocery store, warehouse, Mexican grill, Seattle-based coffee chain and others. While using the money for him and his girlfriend to build a house and add to his legacy and the Rage Knights’ efforts to fight crime.

The Dunn Family glare and scowl at Bradley, who also dances like Kerdur, and *attack* suddenly. They fly past Bradley and defeat Weekday and JC in a fit of rage. Queen Changaul crushes Scottie’s bagpipes and mocks her for never being a good Banderson Davies, while Weekday is defeated by Hutchins, his son, and others. JC fights Key Strucker Dunn and *loses.*

JC curses Bradley, but realizes Bradley had already gotten a haircut and the Rage Knight is already walking away. Fire burns the portraits of the Rage Knights’ various enemies as Scottie screams like a squealing pig.

## Trivia/Notes and Disclaimer

* This story features pig squealing and lizard-hissing.
* Banderson Davies is mentioned in this story, and a set of bagpipes is used by Scottie who often uses a Scottish accent to confuse some customers in Callate Mexican goddesses Grill.

***Disclaimer**: To whom this may concern, the characters in their entirety, while they borrow inspiration from events, ideas, themes, and other sources from the original author's life, are incredibly different and fictional entities inside the Rage Knights Red God and under no circumstance are they expressing a real person's actual views, ideologies, names and likeness to cause harm or defame them. Any names bearing similarities to any person(s) are unintentional unless stated otherwise and under special permission. The Rage Knights Red God is a work of fiction and solely for entertainment and educational purposes. Please note, the series does not represent events that have happened, events to come nor does it condone the very human evils the series itself is/was meant to advocate against. © Khaliq Trevor X.*