recursal/Fanatic-Fandom huggingface dataset:
Sarah

Sarah in Series 1

"*I'm just telling you; KEEP YOUR DAUGHTER AWAY FROM MY DAUGHTER, SHE NOT WELCOME IN MY HOME.*"
— Sharon Osbourne

**Sarah** was a former friend of Kelly and Jack Osbourne who made frequent appearances throughout Series 1 and 2 as well as one final appearance in Series 4. She is perhaps infamous for being blamed for Kelly's downfall during the series.

## Role in The Osbournes

Before the Osbournes, Sarah had met Kelly at school four years prior. She was an avid drummer and quickly became good friends with Kelly and eventually Jack. Sarah's mother was a "Fortune Teller" according to Sharon.

Sarah first appeared as a tomboy friend of Jack and Kelly. Her first appearance was in *There Goes the Neighborhood* where she helped Jack unpack his things. In Won't you be my Neighbor where she was present in Jack's bedroom, for unknown reasons, with Sharon as they complained about the noisy neighbours next door. Sarah would later make appearances mainly around the two, however at some point in Series 1 Jack and Sarah's relationship strained, that said Jack still had concern for Sarah during the course of her attempted drummer career.

In Series 2, Sarah played a larger role in the series with the episode Meow Means No! focusing on her drumming for Kelly's band. During this, Sarah was putting her education on hold for this drumming career, however her skills were not up to scratch and she was replaced to the dismay of Kelly and Sarah herself. The issues were that Sarah never had any any formal lessons and could not keep up with the rest of the band, bringing about frustration for Sharon and the other producers. Sarah is eventually fired and forced to do a an alternative job of handling the slate during the filming of Kelly's video for "Shut Up.", to Sarah's dismay. That said she is gifted $10,000 for her services. Sarah was also the only friend of Kelly's to come to her birthday in Vegas where she engages with Kelly in an argument with Jack before getting highly intoxicated, with Kelly and ultimately humiliated themselves in front of their families. Both Melinda and Sharon became angry with the two, with Sarah and Sharon getting involved in an argument before Sarah stormed out of the room. Sarah later appeared in My Big Fat Jewish Wedding where she was agitated by Jack's new relationship with a girl who once dated Jack's friend.

Sarah did not appear in Series 3 but behind the scenes things were not going so well. Jack's relation had completely collapsed, Sharon and Ozzy came to strongly dislike Sarah after a while. Her final appearance was *Kelly Interrupted*. It had been revealed that Sarah was responsible for Kelly's addiction to drugs, her worsening behaviour, lack of hygiene and lack of self respect. Upon these discoveries, Sharon became furious and and ranted heavily on the phone to Sarah's mother and forbid Sarah from ever seeing Kelly ever again.

## Trivia

* Sharon claims Sarah was edited out of most Series 3 and 4 episodes due to the incident with Kelly.
* According to the commentary, Sarah never saw an episode of The Osbournes.
Rebel Without an Ozz

**Rebel Without an Ozz** is the third episode of the third series of The Osbournes. It originally aired on Febuary 10, 2004.

## Summery

Ozzy and Sharon fret about all of the time they must spend apart as she works on her talk show. One of Sharon's scheduled guests, rapper/actor DMX, runs late and is in danger of not making it to the show on time. He has a history of being late or skipping out on events, and Sharon finds the whole situation very amusing.

Ozzy gives everyone who stops by the house a tour of his new home studio. He enjoys watching porn on the state-of-the-art TV. Ozzy also buys a new motorcycle, but isn't quite sure how to start it. Meanwhile, Jack and his friends find new and disgusting ways to entertain themselves.

## Memorable Quotes

"*Y'know what I don't like about this TV show you're doing? I don't see enough of it!*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*I gotta finish what I committed to.*"
— Sharon Osbourne

"*You're the one going out and working and I'm the one at home. Prince of Darkness, I don't know.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*It's been a dream of mine for years to have a studio but I can't seem to make up my mind.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*I fucking love DMX. He won't come! I just love this! He won't come, watch!*"
— Sharon Osbourne

"*It's for you to not fucking touch!*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*Can we interview L Ron Hubbard.*"
— Sharon Osbourne

"*Porn?! Now we're talking, here we go!*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*Put that foot down on that fucking accelerator and get here!*"
— Sharon Osbourne

"*Dude, I fucking dare you to make your own fucking dildo and give it away.*"
— Jack Osbourne

"*Does it really take three people to make a penis?*"
— Jack's friend

"*What a way to die guys?!*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*He never gave me a fucking key for it!*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*Kel, do you wanna see some midget porn I found on the internet?*"
— Jack Osbourne
Lozt in Translation

**Lozt in Translation** is the eighth episode of the fourth and final series of The Osbournes. It originally aired on March 7, 2005.

## Summery

The family travels to Japan, where Ozzy is to receive the Legend Award at the Video Music Awards. Kelly also makes several personal appearances. One of the employees, Sam, meets with some family members whom he hasn't seen in years, but can only communicate with them through a translator.

## Memorable Quotes

"*I've been condemned to death by a pair of barks.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*I'm not going to countries without good food.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*I used to be (happy) when I used to drink.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*I really smell, y'know and I've got bad B.O. I don't want to get it on the dress.*"
— Kelly Osbourne

"*Will you take care of Minnie? She needs attention and I'm not going to be here.*"
— Sharon Osbourne

"*Do you realize how angry the Japanese get when you're late? You don't have to deal with that, I do!*"
— Kelly Osbourne

"*Even if they do get angry you won't understand what they're yelling at you about.*"
— Jack Osbourne

"*I'm nervous, wouldn't you be if you haven't seen family members for your time here?*"
— Sam

"*This is a good luck charm some one gave me, it's a silver mold of a raccoon's penis.*"
— Kelly Osbourne

"*Minnie and Maggie must be with their mother!*"
— Sharon Osbourne

"*Where's the fucking history channel, man?!*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*When did you get so tall?*"
— Ozzy after seeing Sam's relatives

"*Just say "Thank you very much!" to all the people who pay ya.*"
— Sharon Osbourne

"*Thank you very much, now fuck off!*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*Mum! Minnie's waiting to take a shit on the carpet for you!*"
— Jack Osbourne

"*She ain't going to Heaven.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*Minnie why are you biting your mother? Stupid fucking dog!*"
— Sharon Osbourne

## Trivia

* Burt McCracken's face appears on a magazine that Kelly holds.
Dookie's Revenge

**Dookie's Revenge** is one of two games that is featured on The Osbournes/ The Second Series DVD.

## Game Premise

This time around the player will be able to play as one of the dogs, in particular Lola, Minnie and Arthur, Minnie being the easiest and Lola being the hard mode. Gameplay is as follow, at the bottom of the screen the player will have paw prints that are facing a certain position. The player will have to press the arrow keys on the remote to match the paw direction. Eventually the dog will defecate winning the game, all while the voice of Ozzy Osbourne is heard complaining.

## Trivia

* No matter what, it is only possible to play on the TV and will be impossible to play on a computer due to technical clashes.
Jessica Osbourne

**Jessica Osbourne** is the eldest daughter to Ozzy Osbourne. She is an unseen member of the Osbourne family but she is mentioned. Not much is known about Ozzy's eldest daughter other than she was the first out of Osbourne's children to have children.

## Role in The Osbournes

Jessica is only mentioned once throughout the series, in Series 2's Smells Like Teen Spirits. In this episode Ozzy receives news that Jessica had given birth to a daughter which delight and shocks Ozzy as it meant he was a grandfather for the first time in his life.

## Trivia

* She is the only Osbourne to never make a physical appearance in the show, even Aimee makes a few cameos.
* According to the commentary, Jessica hates the Osbourne family, in particular Sharon and her children with Ozzy.
Louis Osbourne

Louis in 2003

His children are ommitted as they were not born during the time of The Osbournes

### Last Appearance

A Very Ozzy Christmas

**Louis Osbourne** is the eldest son to Ozzy Osbourne. Louis made regular appearances with Ozzy and his family in the first series only.

## Role in The Osbournes

Louis appeared in the very first episode helping the Osbournes move into their new home, he only made very brief cameos in these appearances making few lines. On one occasion he joins Ozzy in teasing Kelly about the gynecologist appointment that Aimee had booked for Kelly. Louis has another notable moment in Get Stuffed where he helps his father clean up the mess caused by Puss who knocked a vase over, he later appeared at Ozzy's birthday party. Louis makes a bigger role in the Christmas special for the series where he stayed with the Osbourne family to celebrate Christmas. He is seen receiving and giving presents to the family members. Later he and Jack mock and tease Kelly at the table, after the dinner he, Jack and possibly Jack's friends splash around in the pool, Louis is not seen again after this.
Aliens Among Us Wiki

## Welcome to the Aliens Among Us Wiki

This wiki discusses the universe of the Alice Dixon series.

## Describe your topic

Write a description about your topic. Let your readers know what your topic is about and add some general information about it.

## Latest activity

Photos and videos are a great way to add visuals to your wiki. Find videos about your topic by exploring Fandom's Video Library.

File:Placeholder
Joanna

**Joanna** is an unseen friend of Kelly Osbourne whom is mentioned by Kelly in the episode Viva Ozz-Vegas.

## Role in The Osbournes

Kelly discusses having a boobjob and mentions a girl known as Joanna who she mentions having "perfect tits" and wishing to have breast like her. According to Aimee Osbourne in the commentary, she claimed that Joanna was a stripper that Kelly met at Las Vegas during her birthday trip. Aimee was also very dismissive of Joanna so it's unknown if she really was a stripper, or Aimee being bitter, what is for certain is that Kelly did indeed meet her in Vegas.
Have Ozz Will Travel

**Have Ozz Will Travel** is the second episode of the fourth and final series of The Osbournes. It originally aired on January 24, 2005.

## Summery

The family tries to decide where to go on vacation. Sharon turns down Fiji because none of the hotels meet her standards, while Ozzy nixes a number of other locations for various reasons. Sharon ultimately decides on Hawaii, although Ozzy is still reluctant to go. Meanwhile, Kelly wins a major role in a television pilot. She must miss out on the family's vacation to go to Vancouver for filming.

## Memorable Quotes

"*How did they know if the Moon was soft?*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*Yes! Let's go on holiday quicker!*"
— Sharon Osbourne

"*We're not going to Hawaii, we go every fucking year!*"
— Jack Osbourne

"*I'm not going to Canada, it's fucking cold!*"
— Kelly Osbourne

"*Fiji's paradise!*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*Tahiti is the worst shithole I've ever been in my life. It's a polluted Hawaii.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*Not Queen Mary, on a fucking airplane!*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*There's a war in Bali, we don't wanna go to Bali.*"
— Sharon Osbourne

"*First of all we need a five star hotel and they're all four star.*"
— Sharon Osbourne

"*Why don't we just go to Malibu?*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*You can get married! Is he Jewish?*"
— Sharon Osbourne

"*FRENCH?! If it's run by the French I ain't going!*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*I ain't going.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*You fucking are, mister!*"
— Sharon Osbourne

"*I'm sick and tired of hearing about the holiday.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*You know what I think the bible is? A book of morals. I don't think any of it happened, it was a book, it was a book of fairytales that teach people good morals.*"
— Kelly Osbourne

"*Have fun in Hawaii you assholes.*"
— Kelly Osbourne

"*Come back a star Kelly, I smell Emmy!*"
— Sharon Osbourne

"*I smell diarrhea!*"
— Kelly Osbourne
The Osbourne Family Album

**The Osbourne Family Album** was a various artists compilation album based on the television series The Osbournes with the songs selected by the family. It included the theme song "Crazy Train" (Pat Boone's version) as well as contributions by Ozzy and Kelly. The songs were interspersed with dialogue (uncensored) from the show. Released on June 12, 2002, it was dedicated to family member Aimee who chose not to participate in the television show. The album was released during the second season of the series.

## Tracks

1. Dialogue
2. "Crazy Train" - Pat Boone
3. Dialogue
4. "Dreamer" - Ozzy Osbourne
5. Dialogue
6. "Papa Don't Preach" - Kelly Osbourne
7. Dialogue
8. "You Really Got Me" - The Kinks
9. Dialogue
10. "Snowblind" - System of a Down
11. Dialogue
12. "Imagine" - John Lennon
13. Dialogue
14. "Drive" - The Cars
15. Dialogue
16. "Good Souls" - Starsailor
17. Dialogue
18. "Mirror Image" - Dillusion
19. Dialogue
20. "Wonderful Tonight" - Eric Clapton
21. Dialogue
22. "Mama, I'm Coming Home" - Ozzy Osbourne
23. Dialogue
24. "Crazy Train" - Ozzy Osbourne
25. Dialogue
26. "Family System" - Chevelle
27. Dialogue
Puss

Puss as she appeared in the first series of The Osbournes

**Puss** was a cat that was owned by the Osbourne family. Puss was the Osbourne family's first cat, until they ended up getting more.

## Role in The Osbournes

Puss was the only animal in the household that is toilet trained as she has her own litterbox. Puss isn't given as much attention as some of the other pets and is usually the only pet to behave itself. Puss was originally the only cat in the household until in Bark at the Moon when Sharon and Kelly Osbourne brought two new cats. Eventually more cats came and Puss was no longer the alpha.

In Series 2, along with other cats, Puss disappeared and was presumed taken by the noisy neighbours or as Ozzy believes eaten by Coyotes. Puss is referenced in series 3 by Ozzy who points at photos of the animals saying that they're dead.
MTV TV Spots with Tenacious D

These are the TV adverts used by MTV to advertise Series 2 of The Osbournes. The two adverts consisted of the comedy band Tenacious D, Jack Black and Kyle Gass singing about the misadventures of the Osbourne family.

## TV Spots

### Jables Jam

The advert starts pitch black in a horror themed land, soon Jack smacks a cowbell causing the singing to start. Jack sings about each family member briefly outlining their personalities such as Ozzy being the "dad", Jack being the "cool kid" with an afro, Kelly being attractive but feisty and Sharon being the Hell bringer. The advert ends with some brief clips from the show before showing Jack Black hovering over a mystic crystal ball.

### Rage Kage Remix

This advert starts with flashes of lightning as Tenacious D play a guitar solo. Jack then explains to the viewers that they won't find out what's happening to Ozzy unless they watch The Osbournes. Once again the advert cuts to some clips from the show before ending with Jack Black biting the head off of a bat.
Melinda Varga (Episode)

**Melinda Varga** is the sixth episode of the rebooted fifth series/spinoff of The Osbournes, also known as The Osbournes Podcast. It originally aired on the 9th April 2018.

## Summary

Kelly agrees to join Jack and Ozzy on season 3 of 'World Detour' but forgets that also means her brother is now her boss. Sharon explains how she juggles her life managing Ozzy and her job on 'The Talk'. The lovely Melinda Varga, the pride of Australia, Sharon's longtime assistant and personal confidant, pops in to discuss (reluctantly) what it's been like working for a crazy family for two decades, as well as her feelings about getting pooped on, which seems to go with Osbourne family territory.

## Memorable Quotes

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## Trivia

* This episode marks the return of Melinda in the series.
* Melinda reveals that Sharon was the only person she never got angry with.
* It is also revealed that Melinda first started working with the Osbourne family on September 11th 2001, and was only called to look after Jack and Aimee Osbourne after the rest of the family were stuck in New York as the attacks took place.
* Melinda still works with the Osbourne family.
	+ She also lives near Jack.
A Little Ditty About Jack and Brienann

**A Little Ditty About Jack and Brienann** is the seventeenth episode of the second series of The Osbournes. It originally aired on the July 22, 2003.

## Summery

Jack visits the home of singer/actress Courtney Love. He begins dating Kurt Cobain's half sister Brieann, who is staying with Courtney. They get along very well, and Jack teaches her some of his favorite recipes, including beans on toast. Sharon is touched to learn that Jack has a tattoo of the word "Mum" with a heart around it. (He got it right after she was diagnosed with cancer.) Ozzy tries out some song lyrics on Sharon, who is busy shopping at the time. He later plays a demo of the new song for Jack and Brieann. Ozzy is bewildered by a rotisserie turkey as it cooks in the kitchen.

## Gallery

A Little Ditty About Jack and Brienann/ Gallery

## Memorable Quotes

"*What did you say? Do you speak English?*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*Time to put the intimidators on.*"
— Jack Osbourne

"*Y'know I'm here! And I'm in my underwear Brienann. They're your responsibility!*"
— Courtney love

"*Cover my ass!*"
— Courtney Love

"*Don't get my ass!*"
— Courtney Love

"*This sucks cause they're out to arrest Kelly right now.*"
— Jack Osbourne

"*They have to use the rites of passage! They arrested me before for saying "fuck" on an airplane.*"
— Courtney Love

"*Did you know I am one of the only people who makes money off of the internet.*"
— Courtney Love

"*She's putting a bra on because her tit keeps falling out.*"
— Jack Osbourne

"*I'm sorry but I think Courtney Love is one of the most intelligent people I've ever met.*"
— Kelly Osbourne

"*I've written some melodies and some lyrics-*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*There's a song in here somewhere.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*Alright Melinda, what ever you do, do not let that child go out what so ever!*"
— Sharon Osbourne

"*Sharon, you're fucking nuts!*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*Don't eat that shit, it's fucking poison!*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*It's a haunted spit.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*It's a fucking haunted cooker!*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*It sounds like the chicken is still alive, yelling*"
— Jack Osbourne

"*The howling spit.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*Melinda on my shoulder? I would do that the day I fucking slash my eyes out.*"
— Jack Osbourne

"*Don't worry, I have "Melinda" tattooed on my taint.*"
— Kelly Osbourne

"*Sharon? Are you listening to me? Sharon?*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*If you're not fucking...the fucking bunny rabbit.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*I'm eating a fucking olive branch.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*It's full of iron y'know.*"
— Tony Dennis

"*and so is a fucking box of nails.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne's response to Tony

"*It's out of love, it's when I got the news you got cancer.*"
— Jack Osbourne

"*It's not a stupid heart for a stupid boyfriend. It says mum in the heart and you're my mum.*"
— Jack Osbourne

## Trivia

* The episode was heavily edited to depict Sharon ignoring Ozzy constantly, though according to the commentary it didn't happen that way.
* This isn't the first appearance of Brienann as she appeared in earlier episodes.
The Osbournes Talking Bobber

**The Osbournes Talking Bobber** was a set of bobble head merchandise involving the Osbourne family as a tie in with the series. The bobble heads were some of the only toys released for the show.

## Features

The bobble heads are like any other bobble head toy, they have a stationary body with a wobbly head connected by a spring. The bobble heads have a small sound system implanted inside which sprouts out some of the Osbournes favourite quotations. There were four bobble heads to accompany each Osbourne that appeared in the show, Ozzy, Sharon, Jack and Kelly Osbourne.

## Known Quotes

### Kelly Osbourne

* *My teeth, my car, my vagina, my business.*

### Sharon Osbourne

* *Will you two shut the (beep) up and go to bed?*
* OZZY!

## Trivia

* The Ozzy bobbler appears in almost every episode in Series 2 and appears in Series 3 and 4 in a few episodes.
* The Sharon, Ozzy and Kelly talking bobbers appeared in the "vault" in the first episode of the third season of Jack and Ozzy World Detour among other merchandise.
Lucas Varga

Lucas as he appeared in The Osbournes

**Lucas Varga,** is the infant son of Melinda Varga. Lucas only appeared in Series 4 as he was born during Series 3.

## Role in The Osbournes

Melinda was pregnant with Lucas in Series 2 and as a result gave birth to him later on, according to the Series 2.5 commentary Melinda gave birth to him on November 23rd, however Melinda corrected this during the Podcast series and stated that he was born October 9th the same day as Sharon's birthday. In Series 4 Lucas made his first appearance when Melinda brought him over to see Sharon and Ozzy Osbourne in their hotel room in Hawaii in order to cheer Ozzy up. Lucas later appeared being fed by Melinda and watched by Jack, both of which ponder over Melinda having a girl like Kelly, they both agree that would be very bad.

Lucas was mentioned in the Podcast with his birth date revealed to be October 9th as opposed to the 2.5 commentary. Lucas, as of the Podcast series, is now a teenager and according to his own mother is a bit of a "nerd" although a very good child.
Alberto

* Flipdeck
* 造型 A
* 造型 B

**Alberto**是一位男性顾客，他首次出现在老爹汉堡店。他是老爹圣代店的男员工

## Flipdeck介绍

家乡：汉堡市

喜欢：香蕉

讨厌：预约牙医

职业：老爹圣代店厨师

在暑假期间，Alberto会在美丽的海女神之岛海滩上方的老爹圣代店工作。身为一位狂热的足球粉丝，他协助安排了岛上第一届业余足球联赛。在周末期间，他与他的女朋友Penny一同担任Freezeria Swizzlers足球队的队长。虽然他们并没有获得很多胜利，但他们仍然一同共度了这美好的时光。

## 画风演变

### 一般

* 汉堡店~卷饼店!
* 圣代店~鸡翅店
* 热狗店~三明治店
* 烘焙店~现今
1/4
### 节日

* 万圣节
1/1
## 订单图册

汉堡店卷饼店圣代店煎饼店汉堡店HD鸡翅店热狗店汉堡店To Go！杯子蛋糕店（星光银禧）杯子蛋糕店（一般）圣代店HD意面店（夏季宴会）意面店（一般）圣代店To Go！甜甜圈店（星光银禧）甜甜圈店（一般）鸡翅店比萨店To Go！干酪店（夏季宴会）干酪店（一般）杯子蛋糕店To Go！（星光银禧）杯子蛋糕店To Go！（一般）杯子蛋糕店HD（星光银禧）杯子蛋糕店HD（一般）烘焙店（星光银禧）烘焙店（一般）卷饼店HD（夏季宴会）卷饼店HD（一般）寿司店（夏季宴会）寿司店（一般）卷饼店To Go！（夏季宴会）卷饼店To Go！（一般）煎饼店HD（星光银禧）煎饼店HD（一般）比萨店HD（万圣节）比萨店HD（一般）热狗店HD（夏季宴会）热狗店HD（一般）热狗店To Go！（夏季宴会）热狗店To Go！（一般）饼干圣代店/HD（一般）
图册
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Don Arden

Don Arden with his daughter

"*I don't buy the bullshit between you and your father. I strongly suggest you pick up the fucking phone and call him. That was the worst thing I ever did now they're never off the phone.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

**Don Arden** (born Harry Levy; 4 January 1926 – 21 July 2007) was an English music manager, agent, and businessman. He managed the careers of rock acts such as Jerry Lee Lewis, Little Richard, Air Supply, Small Faces, The Move, Black Sabbath and Electric Light Orchestra. He was the father of Sharon Osbourne.

He gained a reputation in Britain for his aggressive, sometimes illegal business tactics; which led to his being called "Mr Big", the "Yiddish Godfather" and the "Meyer Lansky of Pop". Arden's success story turned sour when his violent 'negotiating' methods and questionable accounting caught up with him, and he became estranged from members of his own family.

## Role in The Osbournes

Before the Osbournes, Sharon and her father struggled to get along with each other after she married Ozzy, whom he managed originally. The split caused huge ramifications as Don outwardly insulted and pushed his daughter out of his life. The feud lasted for years and Sharon prevented her children from ever seeing their grandfather. Sharon and her father had one particularly nasty argument outside of their home as Jack, Kelly and Aimee watched from inside when they were young.

However, as seen in Season 2 of The Osbournes, Ozzy had been the one to promote the idea of Sharon talking to her father again and inviting him over for their second wedding. Sharon, reluctantly, call her father for the first time in twenty years calling him "you fucking piece of shit" upon first contact. However, they began to talk some more and eventually Don Arden arrived to the Osbourne home, where he met his Grandchildren for the first time. Don Arden and Sharon began speaking almost endlessly, to Ozzy's dismay, and caught up with the activities of the family.

Don Arden appeared for the rest of the first half of Series 2, primarily in the background before making another role in *My Big Fat Jewish Wedding*. Here, he discusses with Sharon about the first wedding she and Ozzy had, what will happen during the second one and how proud he was of Sharon. He walks Sharon down the isle before attending the party afterwards.

## Trivia

* It is revealed in "Jack and Ozzy's World Detour" that the relationship between Ozzy, Sharon and Don Arden never truly improved in contrast to the TV Show.
	+ Ozzy even claims that he and Sharon hated Don Arden, even stating that Sharon only came to love her father when he was close to death.
	+ Despite this, Sharon continued to support her father as his health began to decline.
Tour of Duty/ Bonus Footage

These are the bonus footage/deleted scenes from The Osbournes episode Tour of Duty, these are featured on The Osbournes/ The First series DVD.

## Bonus Footage

### Mom and Dad need Lovin' Too

"*How did ya-How did ya think you were made? From a fucking seed in the fucking garden?*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

Extended scene of Ozzy and Sharon making out on Jack's sofa in his room as he tries to watch TV. Jack makes it obvious he's uncomfortable but Ozzy retaliates saying it's natural.

### Bats Vs. Chicken

Ozzy is asked a question by a radio host on "Do bats taste better than chickens?" whereby Ozzy describes how he had to have rabies shots after eating a bat's head

### Nitro Burning Midget Car

One of the dwarves in costume gets on to one of the life size toy control cars where he encourages Kelly to sit on the back as he speeds off in through the corridor.

### Uncensored Ozzy Butt

It is of the shot of Ozzy flashing his buttocks to the audience during his live show, only unblurred.

### Killing Real Midgets

Ozzy tells a "funny story" about when he was on tour one night him and his crew. He describes how they attempted to "hang" a fake midget up from above. However, police come and ask why they were doing this before asking "are they real midgets and how many have you got?"
The Osbournes Wiki

**Welcome to**

This is a wiki dedicated to documenting the events from the MTV Reality TV show The Osbournes that aired from 2002-2005 as well as the new successor Podcast series The Osbournes Podcast which aired in 2018. This will not include any outside information about the people involved and/or Osbourne family and will only be about the TV show.

The Osbournes A Very Ozzy ChristmasThe Osbournes - Best of the 'Pain in the Neck' episode (Season 3)The Osbournes - 'A Farewell to Ozz' episode, with Dr. Phil (Season 4, Episode 10) 2005

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Create an article about a whole season by typing the title below:

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The Osbournes 2.5 DVD

The second season of the reality series The Osbournes premiered on MTV on December 3, 2002 and concluded on August 12, 2003, consisting a total of 20 episodes. The series follows the lives of Ozzy Osbourne and his family. This was the last of the three DVDs released for the series and served as the second half of Series 2.

## Episodes

 Ozz Well That Ends All | August 10, 2003

## Special Features

### Ozzy Translator

Due to Ozzy's mumbling and stutteriness, there was a "Ozzy translator" to help viewers differentiate what he was saying.

### Bonus Footage

Deleted and extended scenes from the show that didn't make the cut, all divided into different sections (i.e. the episodes).

### MTV TV Spots with Tenacious D

These were the TV spots used to advertise the series with the help from comedy rock band Tenacious D.

### Choose Your Ozz Adventure

Where the viewer can edit scenes and make up their own scene.

### Picture Gallery

The Osbournes 2.5 DVD/ Gallery

A range of official photos taken from the second Wedding from the show.

## Trivia

* This is the last DVD to be made.
	+ This would also be the last official release of any Osbourne episode before the 2018 Podcast.
* The commentary for this DVD was done sometime during or after Series 4.
* The DVD is often mistaken and referred to as it's own series by Sharon Osbourne despite being the second half of Series 2.
What the *@&%$ did he say?

**What the \*@&%$ did he say?** is one of two games that is featured on The Osbournes/ The Second Series DVD.

## Game Premise

For this game a clip of Ozzy mumbling is played, it then goes to three possible things that he may have said during this clip. No matter what the clips will always be the same everytime you play, but will be randomised.
Abused Producer

The Abused Producer as he appeared in The Osbournes

"*Jack, you've been attacking the crew too much lately.*"
— Sharon Osbourne

**The Abused Producer** is an unnamed producer for The Osbournes, he is highlighted in the blooper section of the series DVD.

## Role in The Osbournes

Jack had been very feisty towards the production crew and had attacked them almost everytime they crossed paths. In one particular incident, one producer tried to flee the residence but Jack ended up jumping onto his car dancing on top of it. It's unknown what happened next.
The Osbournes Trading Cards

**The Osbournes Trading Cards** is a piece of merchandise released in 2002 based on the success of first series.

## Basic description

There are 72 cards altogether, each pack of cards contained six. The 72-card base set focuses on the show's first season. Subsets include "There Goes The Neighborhood," "In The Doghouse," and "Sharonnnnn!" Fronts of the cards highlight favorite moments from the show with some of the show's most quotable lines on the backs.

Inserts include autographs and Pieceworks cards featuring pieces of clothing worn by Ozzy Osboure, Sharon, Jack and Kelly. Boxes don't guarantee any hits but two out of three do have a Pieceworks card. Autographs were tougher, landing 1:137 packs.

## Cards

1. Crazy
2. Kelly's Birthday
3. Surprise for Ozzy
4. Ozzy's Birthday
5. Thanksgiving Day
6. The Gravy Chef
7. Christmas Dinner
8. The Meaning of Christmas
9. Merry Christmas from The Osbournes
10. The Dad
11. Family First
12. Play By The Rules
13. Be Unique
14. Take Time For Yourself
15. No Smoking
16. Listen and Learn
17. Care For Your Pets
18. Fences Make Good Neighbors
19. The Mom
20. Inspirations
21. Shopaholic
22. No Martha Stewart
23. Laugh Track
24. Manager
25. When Pigs Fly
26. Sex, drugs...
27. Toilet Water
28. The Daughter
29. Heart Forever
30. Daddy's Girl
31. Lost and Found
32. Curfews
33. Different
34. Fake ID
35. That's the Ticket
36. Rising Star
37. The Son
38. Fun & Games
39. Hair Today
40. Nanny Woes
41. No Mall Rat
42. Good Hair Day
43. Empire Building
44. Parents Say the Darndest Things
45. Off To Camp
46. Lola
47. Minnie
48. Crazy Baby
49. Maggie
50. Puss
51. Lulu
52. Martini
53. Pipi
54. Gus
55. Maid of the Mansion
56. Star Treatment
57. Room Service
58. High Society
59. Fine Dining
60. Bearing Crosses
61. Dirty Business
62. On The Road Again
63. Public Relations
64. Tiny Bubbles
65. The Remote
66. Dog Toy
67. Making a Living
68. Non-Stop Rock 'n Roll
69. Old Stand By
70. The Smell of Victory
71. Falling for Ozzy
72. Checklist

## References

1. ↑ http://www.tradercracks.com/entertainment/tv/2002-inkworks-osbournes-trading-cards
Tigger

**Tigger** (also referred to as "Tiggy") was a cat that was owned by the Osbourne family.

## Role in The Osbournes

Tigger made very small appearances in the show, first debuting in Meow Means No! However it was Tennis Racket where Tigger made a major impact in the show. Here, as the Osbournes were dealing with new noisy neighbours and their tennis court, Tigger went missing one of the nights. Tigger's disappearance lead to Sharon Osbourne believing the neighbours had killed it, after they made a complaint about their cats invading and defecating on the tennis courts. However, and correctly so, Ozzy claimed it was coyotes. It is known that Ozzy's bodyguard Sam had attempted to search and even put up missing posters for Tigger. Tigger's disappearance would be followed by Gus and then Puss, all of whom were killed by coyotes.

## Trivia

* Tigger is the only Abyssinian cat the Osbourne family owned.
* Most if not all footage of Tigger is the same shot of it perched and looking around.
Jay Leno

Jay Leno as he appeared in The Osbournes

**Jay Leno** is an American comedian, actor, philanthropist and television host. After doing standup comedy for years, he became the host of NBC's The Tonight Show with Jay Leno from 1992 to 2009. Beginning in September 2009, Leno started a primetime talk show, titled The Jay Leno Show, which aired weeknights at 10:00 p.m. ET, also on NBC.

## Role in The Osbournes

Ozzy Osbourne appeared on the show as a guest for The Tonight Show. Jay talked to Ozzy and asked for an autograph for his nephew. Ozzy agreed and then performed at the end of The Tonight Show to promote his new album.
Unknown Osbourne Bird

The bird as it appeared in the second series of The Osbournes

"*This fucking bird's gone into a fucking seizure. We've got an alcoholic fucking bird!*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

The unknown bird appears only in Must Come Down in Series 2 of The Osbournes.

## Role in The Osbournes

According to the commentary the bird was given to the family as a gift, however the bird was still young and had no mother to look after it. The bird stayed at Malibu with Ozzy on his travels. During a talk with Tony Dennis the bird started making noises which triggered Ozzy to go and feed it, Ozzy believes the bird is a parrot but it obviously wasn't. Ozzy tries to feed the bird with his hand but the bird starts to spasm, Ozzy then puts food in his mouth and put the bird's head in his mouth to eat the food in his mouth. According to the commentary the bird later died a few days later, Kelly believed Ozzy fed it to death, however Sharon denies these claims and says that the Vet had confirmed that the bird was taken from its mother too young and therefore failed to adapt and died as a result.
Pain in the Neck

**Pain in the Neck** is the eighth episode of the third series of The Osbournes. It originally aired on April 20, 2004.

## Summery

Ozzy grows increasingly frustrated about being cooped up around the house. He misses Sharon, who is busy working on her show, and is upset about the weight he has been gaining because he cannot work out. He also hates the bulky neck brace that he is forced to wear. Jack gets another tattoo and reveals it to Ozzy.

Ozzy is so bored that he goes out grocery shopping with his assistant, Tony, even though he hates to shop. He later joins Jack at the shooting range. Ozzy is soon able to begin using the treadmill again, and receives the good news that he can take off the neck brace.

## Memorable Quotes

"*This movie is so good, it's gory as fuck!*"
— Jack Osbourne

"*I can't exercise, I'm getting fat. I'm fucking pissed off about having this fucking thing around my neck.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*My poor husband is not doing good...*"
— Sharon Osbourne

"*It's impracticable. It's the most annoying thing.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*Keep wearing that thing, you're gonna look like Jerry Lewis.*"
— Sam

"*I don't sound like a woman, that's very rude. I am one.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*One addiction influences another.*"
— Jack Osbourne

"*As guys get older they get bigger...knockers. I had mine suck out.*"
— Ozzy to Melinda and another mother

"*I can't stand going shopping, I look like I cut my arm off!*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*Don't you have any fish in there?*"
— Sam

"*They're all dead!*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*(laughs) So you got a tank with no fish?!*"
— Sam

"*I would go but me with a gun ain't cute!*"
— Kelly Osbourne

"*Are you ever gonna come home and be a husband to me? ...I mean wife.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*Ton, do you think I'm a total dumpf? It ain't for me, it ain't for you, it ain't for Kelly, then who the fuck's it for?!*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

## Trivia

* Ozzy is seen as an expert shot while using a gun, this would later be seen in other Osbourne related show, *Jack and Ozzy's World Detour*
Dinner with Ozzy/ Bonus Footage

These are the bonus footage/deleted scenes from The Osbournes episode Dinner with Ozzy, these are featured on The Osbournes/ The First series DVD.

## Bonus Footage

### Bullet in Kelly's Leg

Extended scene from of the air rifle incident. Kelly tells Melinda how she got shot by Jack one day while complaining how violent he is. She reveals their parents were away and Zakk Wylde had to baby sit them. But Jack, with an air rifle, had shot Kelly "by accident". Jack claims he told Kelly to get the dogs out of the way and she ran in front as he shot.

### Marilyn Manson Speaks

Taking place when Ozzy gets his Hollywood star, good friend Marilyn Manson gives a speech.

"*First time I was at Ozzfest I had to sue the State of New Jersey cause I was more offensive than Ozzy. The second time I was at Ozzfest I became more of a um- Uncle Manson to the Osbournes and was often told to watch them (the kids). I took young Jack Osbourne to his first strip bar. And Ozzy himself offered to wife swap with me even though i myself don't ahve a wife.*"
— Marilyn Manson's Speech

### Ozzy on Sharon

"*If it wasn't for Sharon, I'd be dead long ago.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

Ozzy while eating talks about his wife, Sharon. He describes how much he loves Sharon and states that he's not really a husband but rather just a big kid. He also says that he doesn't know how a credit card works.

### Ozzyism

A montage of "Ozzyisms" which are essentially bunch of random strange sayings and quotes Ozzy says.

### What?

"*What the fuck?!*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

A compilation of Ozzy saying "What?".

### Never Happened Twice

Ozzy tells a story of a time he went to a pub. He states that they ended up leaving with two hookers and a man with a coat full cocaine all while riding in the back of a limousine. Ozzy claims it was the best night ever. His friends say that they should go again but Ozzy is reluctant and says "it can't happen twice" Ozzy remembers holidays where he's been twice and they're never the same.

### Ozzyisms 2

Unlike the previous "Ozzyisms" this only contains one clip. The clip has Ozzy discussing how he sometimes hates the show and the cameras around him but likes the honesty of the show.

## Trvia

* This contains the most amount of deleted scenes for the first season.
Episode 9

**This article is a disambiguation page for Episode 9**

The following is a list of links to pages that might share the same title.

Please follow one of the disambiguation links below or search to find the page you were looking for if it is not listed. If an internal link led you here, you may wish to change the link to point directly to the intended article.

This is a guide for each of the episode 9's from The Osbournes.

* A Very Ozzy Christmas (Series 1)
* Viva Ozz-Vegas (Series 2)
* Ozzy Knows Best (Series 3)
* The Show Must Go Off! (Series 4)
* Carnie Wilson (Episode) (Podcast)
Phil McGraw

Dr Phil as he appeared in The Osbournes

**Phil McGraw** (also known as Dr Phil for shorts) is an American television personality, author, psychologist, and the host of the television show Dr. Phil, which debuted in 2002. McGraw first gained celebrity status with appearances on The Oprah Winfrey Show in the late 1990s.

## Role in The Osbournes

Dr Phil appeared in the final episode of the Series. In the episode he sits down and interviews the Osbourne family members, discussing about their reckless nature. He discusses how Jack and Kelly Osbourne's upbringing could have had an effect on their behaviors and how Ozzy's drug and alcohol abuse could have also been an influence on how the family behave. Despite seeing the family as dysfunctional, he believes the family is also one of the closest he has ever seen. Despite this he doesn't consider the family a normal one.
Valentine Daze

**Valentine Daze** is the ninth episode of the third series of The Osbournes. It originally aired on May 4, 2004.

## Summery

Kelly continues to spend time with Rob, but doesn't want to be his girlfriend because he wants a committed relationship and she feels that she is too young to settle down. Sharon and Melinda try to convince her to change her mind. Jack heads off to Las Vegas. Ozzy and Sharon worry that he will spend too much time gambling. Kelly tells her parents that she is going to drive to San Diego.

They don't want her to go, but eventually offer their approval. It turns out she has lied and is also headed to Vegas. Ozzy becomes annoyed with Sharon for trying to decorate his studio. Ozzy and Sharon spend Valentine's Day together and express the hopes that their kids will meet someone special soon. They reflect on their years together.

## Memorable Quotes

"*He's got too many of those stupid fucking tattoos all over him.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*If I were an Mongal you'd still love me?*"
— Kelly Osbourne

"*No.*"
— Ozzy's reply

"*Whenever I see him, I don't know whether I want to hug him or cry.*"
— Kelly osbourne

"*Coming from someone who doesn't understand, you cannot judge.*"
— Kelly to Jack

"*Oh God! I pray on everything that's holy, that I never have a daughter.*"
— Jack Osbourne's rather ironic quote

"*Nothing can go in my studio, nothing hanging can go in my studio.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*Alright what's happening in the land of Kelly?*"
— Sharon Osbourne

"*I'm 19 years old! I should be able to say "I want to go out with you today and you tomorrow"*"
— Kelly Osbourne

"*Leave my room alone, I don't want anything ordered without my consent.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*It's gonna be Jack's Casino, he's a "gamblerholic"* "
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*Ozzy do you think I should have a nose job?*"
— Sharon Osbourne

"*Why do you ask me this stupid question, you've already made up your mind and you're gonna come back looking like fucking Micheal.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*Why did you tell us, the answer's no but you're still gonna fucking go anyway.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*I want you to be nice.*"
— Sharon Osbourne

"*Well wait till tonight!*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*I got this phone call from 1 in the morning from some guy who was asking "Where's Kelly?" and I asked "Who are you?" he replied by saying "Tony, she's meant to be in Vegas,"*"
— Sharon Osbourne

"*Don't be such a hurry, it'll happen when it happens.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*Who the fuck's Renée Zellweger?*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*No, No, No! I brought the fucking painting for not for you!*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*To say I have no regrets, I have many.*"
— Sharon Osbourne
Episode 2

**This article is a disambiguation page for Episode 2**

The following is a list of links to pages that might share the same title.

Please follow one of the disambiguation links below or search to find the page you were looking for if it is not listed. If an internal link led you here, you may wish to change the link to point directly to the intended article.

This is a guide for each of the episode 2's from The Osbournes.

* Bark at the Moon (Series 1)
* Must Come Down (Series 2)
* Car Jacked (Series 3)
* Have Ozz Will Travel (Series 4)
* Big Dave the Manny (Podcast)
Sandra

"*KEEP YOUR DAUGHTER AWAY FROM MY DAUGHTER, SHE NOT WELCOME IN MY HOME, NEITHER ARE YOU, YOUR A FUCKING FRUITLOOP, THAT TELLS FORTUNES! YOU'RE BOTH HUSTLERS! YOU'RE A FUCKING HUSTLER, TAKE YOUR DAUGHTER AND FUCK OFF, YOU FUCKING CUNT!*"
— Sharon Osbourne

**Sandra** is the unseen mother of Sarah who is frequently mentioned throughout The Osbournes.

## Role in The Osbournes

Sandra was mentioned by Sharon to have worked as a "fortune teller" and she had at least one daughter, Sarah. Sarah became good friends with Kelly Osbourne and Jack Osbourne.

However, as seen in Kelly Interrupted, Kelly became an addict to drugs and her lifestyle completely changed for the worse. Ozzy, Sharon and Jack suspected Sarah to have been an influencing factor in all of it. Sharon then had a phone call to Sandra forbidding either her or her daughter from ever seeing Kelly or visiting the home ever again. Sandra (based on Sharon's responses) was trying to defend her daughter but it didn't work.
Scent of a Woman

**Scent of a Woman** is the seventh episode of the third series of The Osbournes. It originally aired on April 13, 2004.

## Summery

Kelly annoys everyone, particularly Sharon, with her disgusting lack of personal hygiene as she refuses to shower for a long period of time. She is upset when Sharon accuses her of smoking, which she later finds cigarettes in Kelly's car to prove her case. Ozzy receives a letter supposedly from the Prime Minister of Canada asking him to come to Canada to receive an award. Ozzy, however, suspects that the whole thing is a hoax.

## Memorable Quotes

"*It's what I do to my hair, put some colour in it after breaking my fucking neck.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*You're the Prince of fucking lunatics not Darkness*"
— Kelly Osbourne

"*What is your deal? "Oh Kelly's the dirty tomboy who doesn't shower or flush the toilet".*"
— Kelly Osbourne

"*Eurgh! That smells like old cigarettes!*"
— Melinda Varga

"*Kelly's going back to her roots. She's going dirty fanny girl.*"
— Sharon Osbourne

"*Everytime I come your customs, they give me such a hard time because when I was young, y'know.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*I'll drive the "dirty bustbin" until my car gets back.*"
— Sharon Osbourne

"*There's about four fucking baths that you can go in!*"
— Melinda Varga

"*I look like a fucking bulldog with this thing around my neck.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*Boris had diarrhea in the back of my car!*"
— Kelly Osbourne

"*I won't swear, I won't curse. What the fuck do you think I'm gonna do?*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*I think it's a fucking wind up, I'm telling you it's a fucking wind up!*"
— Ozzy Osbourne

"*Press pause, can I talk to you?*"
— Kelly to Jack

"*I don't want to talk via videogames Jack.*"
— Kelly Osbourne

"*There's probably an assassin waiting for me.*"
— Ozzy Osbourne
Won't you be my Neighbor/ Bonus Footage

These are the bonus footage/deleted scenes from The Osbournes episode Won't you be my Neighbor, these are featured on The Osbournes/ The First series DVD.

## Bonus Footage

### Anthrax for the Neighbors

This scene is an extended cut from the scene in the actual episode that depicts Jack, Sharon Osbourne and Sarah on the bed talking about how they will deal with the neighbors. Jack suggests mailing them anthrax like what was happening to the US government at the time. Sharon wants to yell at them but soon sees Jack with a gun and wishes he would go up to them with the gun. They then talk about Ozzy Osbourne and why he's unhappy with the chart positioning, Sharon blames Celine Dion and goes as far as to say she has a pact with the devil.

### Neighbor Battle rages on

This footage shows Ozzy attacking the neighbors, he grabs a piece of wood and attempts to light it on fire in preparation to set the house on fire. Ozzy fails to to so and instead starts attacking the neighbors with food, he almost trips over scaring Sharon. Jack and Sharon plan to get a BB Gun ready to shoot them with it. Kelly argues that they should just phone the police or get lawyers to do deal with the situation but Jack and Sharon ignore this. Later Jack and Dill go over and try and be reasonable towards the neighbors asking them to be quiet, they ignore and begin to argue with Jack, which continues in the actual episode.

### Kelly's Fuck Buckle

Kelly is given a "FUCK" belt buckle by her mother, however both Sharon and Ozzy disapproves and takes it away saying it won't be worn outside.

## Trivia

* The second bonus feature shows the actual order of the neighbor battle.