Bon Bon Has A Bad Breath A Spongebob Parody

My Third fanfiction MLP EQG

*[The exterior of Bon Bon's house is shown. The scene zooms into the interior of Bon Bon's, bed room. Her alarm clock goes off. She gets up, still in her pijamas, puts her blanket on like a cape, and uses the wind of the alarm clock to "fly" at her big calendar. She lands on the 20th day, which is a Sunday]*

**Bon Bon:** Wow, it's Sunday, Candy! Guess what's for breakfast?

**Candy:** Meow.

**Bon Bon:** *[scene changes to show the two her kitchen. Bon Bon opens the door.]* That's right! *[puts a bowl on the kitchen counter]* A sundae! *[runs to the freezer and finds it empty]* Whoops... Looks like we're out of ice cream. Guess I'll have to use something else... Ketchup! *[Runs back to the bowl with a big bottle of Ketchup. She squeezes a bunch of ketchup into the bowl. She runs over to a cupboard]* Hmmm... Bananas... Cherries... Boring. *[closes cupboard door]* Ah, here we go! Onions! *[runs up to the counter with two sacks that say "onions" on them]* Ready, Candy?

**Candy:** Meow. *[Plays a violin while Bon Bon cries while peeling the onions into the bowl]*

**Bon Bon:** Just one more thing! Pea... *[opens up another cupboard, but finds an empty jar]* ...nuts. Candy! *[She walks over to her cat while shaking the empty jar]* Our peanuts jar is totally empty! *[Candy burps showing that she ate all the peanuts]* Hmmm *[snaps fingers]* Wait! I know one other place we can find peanuts. *[looks in the bathroom and finds a peanut plant in front of the window]* Good thing I still have these peanut plants growing in the windowsill. *[throws the plant into the sundae bowl]* A little texture never hurt. There we go. *[gets out a spoon]* This sundae's gonna taste great! *[She turns around]* Aren't you going to help me, Buddy? Candy? Oh, well. More for me! *[takes a few spoonfuls. Scene cuts to Bon Bon coming out of the kitchen with a bunch of stink coming out with her. She drops her spoon while Candy hides behind a Flower plant]* You know what they say, Candy. I'm easy like Sunday morning. *["morning" comes out of Bon Bon's mouth and wraps itself around Candy's body, twisting them. The scene changes to show Bon Bon outside her house]* Okay, let's see my to-do list. *[takes out a big long list]* Go to school, Go to school, Go to school, Go to school, Go to school. *[her list "droops"]* Wait, that's not right. I need the one for Sunday. *[takes out a small piece of paper]* Ah, here we go. 'Say hi to everyone in Canterlot'. *[runs off. Scene cuts to Bon Bon running up to a citizen]* Hello. *[citizen runs off in disgust of her bad breath. Bon Bon waves]* Some people are even *late* on Sunday. *[Bon Bon notices a mailman]* Hi, Mailman. *[mailman smells Bon Bon's bad breath and he breaks his skin into a smaller citizen and then into another smaller citizen. Bon Bon hears a whistling noise]* Hi, Mrs. Crossing Guard! *[crossing guard gets a whiff of her bad breath]*

**Mrs. Crossing Guard:** Mother of mercy! *[children walk across the street and then the sound of a crashing car sounds, but it’s revealed to actually be a parade]*

**Bon Bon:** Wow! A parade! Hi, parade! *[the band stops]* *[while she speaks a stink ball is forming]* Hi, tuba player, hi, drummer, hi, guy with the cymbals, hi, trumpeter, hi tambourine girl, hi, timbale man, hi, didgeridoo player, *[didgeridoo player wears a big skirt, hat, sunglasses]* hi, triangle player, hi, guy with the kettle drum, hi, pianist, hi, guy with the flute. And heeelllooo, Dolly! *[the stench ball rolls down the street, knocking the band out like a bunch of bowling pins with a strike sound effect and scattering them about. They all run out wailing in pain and disgust. The whole town is soon deserted]*

**Band Members:** My leg! My leg! *[they all run away from the stench]*

**Bon Bon:** Was it something I said? *[she walks down the street]* Something weird is going on today. Everyone is running away from me. And now... *[she notices Lyra Sitting on a bench]* ...i did something bad?

**Lyra:** *[waving]*Hi, Bon Bon.

**Bon Bon:** Oh, Hi, Lyra I'm confused.

**Lyra:** Yes, I am.

**Bon Bon:** Lyra, everyone is running away from me. Watch. *[she walks over to a building]* Hi, building! *[the stench bounces off the building, became alive and it slowly moves away. Bon Bon walks back to her friend]* I just don't get it.

*[The stench goes toward Lyra, but bounces off her nose.]*

**Lyra:** I don't either. Maybe it's the way you're dressed. *[pan up slowly at Bon Bon's clothes, looking fancy]*

**Both:** Nah.

**Lyra:** Maybe it's your voice. *[Bon Bon laughs for an extended time, then stops]*

**Bon Bon:** Good one, Lyra.

**Lyra:** Well, maybe it's just because you're ugly.

**Bon Bon:** Ugly? *[she puts a finger in her mouth, wipes her forehead with it, then strikes a pose. A spotlight goes off]* You gotta be kiddin' me..

**Lyra:** Better try the reflection test. *[she pulls out a large mirror out of nowhere]*

**Bon Bon:** *[to her reflection]* Hi. *[the stench hits her reflection, and the reflection takes a hammer and breaks the mirror. Lyra peeks through it]*

**Lyra:** Ugly.

**Bon Bon:** Oh no! I can't be ugly! I can't be! I can't be ugly! *[she runs up to a couple]* Am I ugly? *[the two catch a whiff on the stench. The husband and his wife runs away. Bon Bon runs off and latches onto a car's windshield]* Am I ugly? *[the stench goes around the glass and hits the driver's eyes]*

**Driver:** My eyes! My eyes!

*[the car swerves, spins around, throwing Bon Bon off, then explodes. All that's left is the charred frame, but a policeman gives it a ticket anyway. A tire bounces by and lands on Bon Bon, who is on the ground]*

**Bon Bon:** Oof I'm ugly... *[cut to night at Bon Bon's house. Lightning strikes repeatedly as Lyra walks in]*

**Lyra:** Bon Bon, can I borrow some bath beads? *[she walks through the dark house. She opens the Dark room door. It's pitch dark, except for a light from the fire. Bon Bon mournfully plays Phantom of the Opera-style organ music. Lyra walks up to her, and she stops playing]* Bon Bon? *[the lights go on, and Bon Bon turns. She's wearing a Groucho Marx-esque nose and glasses, and a dark cape. She turns her back to Lyra]*

**Bon Bon:** Go. Run away like all the others. No one would want a friend as ugly as I am. *[she hits down on the organ]*

**Lyra:** sure they would! It makes them feel better about the way they look! Maybe a story will cheer you up. *[she picks Bon Bon up, without glasses or cape, up and puts her in her comfy chair]* It's called, 'The Ugly Little Girl.' *[Bon Bon listens attentively]* Once there was an Ugly Little Girl. She was so ugly that everyone died! The end. *[Lyra grins, oblivious to her story's bad message]*

**Bon Bon:** *[shocked and sad]* That didn't help at all. *[she starts sobbing]* How long? How long have I been ugly, Lyra?

**Lyra:** As long as I can remember. You poor ugly thing, you. *[Bon Bon clings on Lyra]*

**Bon Bon:** Help me! I'm so ashamed! I'm spiraling! I'm spiraling! *[Lyra smacks Bon Bon in the face, twisting her head around and rubs her cheek]* Thanks, Lyra. *[Lyra holds her hand up again ready to slap her again, and Bon Bon stops her, stammering]* It's okay, Lyra. Spiraling, over.

**Lyra:** Just do what I do when I have problems. *[screaming]* Scream! *[Bon Bon is covered with spit from Lyra. Lyra grabs Bon Bon and runs off]* Come on, buddy. I'll help you. *[cut to Bon Bon and Lyra on the roof]* Okay, now, say it. *[Bon Bon hesitates]* Say it.

**Bon Bon:** I can't.

**Lyra:** Bon Bon, you're never going to feel better unless you get this thing off your chest. *[we see Bon Bon has a alien-like leach sucking on her chest]*

**Bon Bon:** I know, Lyra. *[she pulls it off and throws it aside]*

**Lyra:** Say it. Say it.

**Bon Bon:** I'm ugly.

**Lyra:** You're ugly and what...?

**Bon Bon:** White?

**Lyra:** No. Proud.

**Bon Bon:** I'm ugly and I'm proud.

**Lyra:** Good! Say it louder.

**Bon Bon:** *[louder]* I'm ugly and I'm proud.

**Lyra:** Louder.

**Bon Bon:** *[louder]* I'm ugly and I'm proud.

**Lyra:** Louder!

**Bon Bon:** *[yelling]* I'm ugly and I'm proud! *[pan over to Adagio Dazzle's roof, where she's tanning]* I'm ugly and I'm proud! I'm ugly and I'm proud!

**Adagio Dazzle:** Is that what she calls it? *[Bon Bon is breathing heavily]*

**Bon Bon:** That felt great! I feel empowered.

**Lyra:** So whaddya wanna do now?

**Bon Bon:** I don't know. How about a movie? *[cut to 'Canterlot' movie theater. Bon Bon and Lyra walk into a crowded theater. The two go down the front row]* Pardon me. Ugly Girl coming through. *[two citizens smell Bon Bon's breath, their pupils dilate, and they run away]*

**Lyra:** People respect self esteem. *[she and Bon Bon sit down in the two now empty seats. Bon Bon leans over to Cheerilee sitting next to her]*

**Bon Bon:** Hi. I am very ugly. But you should enjoy the movie anyway. *[the stench burns Cheerilee's eyes, complexion, and hair off, and her head is now all charred. She leans over Lyra to Sandalwood beside Lyra, who is watching the movie]* Excuse me, sir. I hope my horrible ugliness won't be a distraction to you.

**Sandalwood:** Not at all, Girl. *[sniffs]* Deuueaugh! *[Smells Bon Bon's bad breath. Makes a sourly disgusted expression, screams out a disgusted noise, and then quickly runs away]*

**Lyra:** *[to Bon Bon while slurping her soda]* Don't worry about him, Bon Bon. He's just a- *[she notices her friend crying]* Bon Bon? Bon Bon, what's wrong?

**Bon Bon:** *[sobbing]* I can't do this, Lyra! I've tried, and I've tried, *[she turns around, revealing an extremely deflated face]* but I'm not always as confident as I look. Maybe I'd better just go back and hide. *[Lyra goes from sad to angry]*

**Lyra:** *[loudly]* What is wrong with you people?! *[she stands up, dropping her drinks in the process]* Afraid to look ugliness in the face? *[she picks up Bon Bon]* Well, here! Look at it! *[the stench pours into the audience]* It's ugly, isn't it?! *[she points Bon Bon at five people]* You look at it!

**Bon Bon:** Hello.

*[The crowd run off. Lyra points Bon Bon at a larger group of people]*

**Lyra:** You look at it!

**Bon Bon:** Hi.

*[The crowd run off.]*

**Lyra:** *[points Bon Bon at the whole audience]* Look at it! *[the entire room empties out]* Look at it! Look at it! Look at it! I want all of you to look at it!

*[Everybody screams in terror and they all run out of the theater in a panic. Lyra and Bon Bon are all alone in the theater]*

**Bon Bon:** They all ran away, Lyra.

**Lyra:** I bet there's no line at the snack bar. *[cut to the snack bar. Lyra leans over the counter]* Hello...? Hello...? They must be on break.

*[Lyra looks bummed out]*

**Bon Bon:** Oh, wait, Lyra! I just remembered. *[she reaches in her pocket and pulls out some of her sundae]* I've got some of my peanut-onion sundae we can share!

*[The fume of it floats past Lyra, burning off her eyebrows]*

**Lyra:** That looks great! *[closes her mouth on Bon Bon's hand, and sucks out the sundae. Bon Bon's hands are covered in spit, Lyra sighs with relief, but she starts to feel funny, Her stomach makes engine spluttering noises]* Oh, I gotta go to the restroom! *[she runs off. Cut to the bathroom, where Lyra and Watermelody wash their hands at the sink]* I'm out of soap, can I borrow- *[the stench reaches the teenage girl]*

**Watermelody:** Stay back!

**Lyra:** I just want some-

*[Watermelody takes out some money]*

**Watermelody:** Here! Here's my money! *[she drops it]* Take it! Take it! And go away!

*[She runs off]*

**Lyra:** My hands aren't that dirty... *[she walks over to a line of three girls waiting at a stall]* Hey, you girls want to hear a bathroom joke?

*[Lyra's breath reaches the teenage girls and they make disgusted noises.]*

**Blueberry Cake:** You tryin' to kill us?!

*[The girls walk out murmuring. Lyra looks in the mirror.]*

**Lyra:** *[In shock]* Oh... Oh! I caught the ugly!

*[Bon Bon walks in]*

**Bon Bon:** Lyra, is everything okay in here? *[she hears Lyra sobbing. She opens a stall door and sees Lyra sitting on the toilet with a bag over her head]* What are you doing in there, Lyra?

**Lyra:** Wouldn't you like to know?

**Bon Bon:** And why is that bag on your head?

**Lyra:** Why? Oh, no reason. Except you gave me the ugly! *[she whips the bag off and points at her face. Bon Bon recoils and gasps. Lyra walks out]* What am I gonna do? I can't go out looking like this!

**Bon Bon:** Just remember what we talked about. There's power in pride.

**Lyra:** That may be fine for you, but I was one of the beautiful people. Now look at me! *[her breath reaches Bon Bon and she holds her nose in disgust]* I'm almost as ugly as you! I always thought if I was as ugly as that guy, I don't know what I'd do.

**Bon Bon:** Lyra...?

**Lyra:** What's my mom gonna say?

**Bon Bon:** *[plugging her nose]* Lyra?

**Lyra:** Oh my gosh, if my sister finds out, wait, I don't have a sister, if the bank, I mean it's one thing if you have bad shoes, or even bad hair, but... *[Bon Bon screams at Lyra in rage to get her attention and stop her rambling as it works]*

**Bon Bon: LYRA!!** *[Calmly]* You're not ugly. Your breath stinks. Really bad. *[Lyra sighs with relief, her stench in the shape of a skull and crossbones]*

**Lyra:** *[Relaxed]* Ahhhhhhhh, what a relief...

**Bon Bon:** *[her eyes water from the foul smell]* Arrgh, *Jeez*, Lyra! What did you eat?!

**Lyra:** Oh, some roast beef, some chicken, a pizza...

**Bon Bon:** No, I mean just this morning.

**Lyra:** Some roast beef, some chicken, a pizza...

**Bon Bon:** What else?

**Lyra:** Well, I had some of your sundae

**Bon Bon:** Sundae... *[she whips what's remaining of it out]* Lyra! My sundae gave us rancid breath!

**Lyra:** Whatcha mean? *[Bon Bon coughs as Lyra's breath flies by her]*

**Bon Bon:** I mean, we're not ugly, we just stink!

**Lyra:** Stink? *[the two cheer and run around in circles chanting]*

**Both:** We stink! We stink! We stink! We stink! We stink! We stink!

*[The fumes encompass the entire theater and it dissolves to the ground. Bon Bon and Lyra run out and run up to Adagio Dazzle, who is looking through the window of a wig shop]*

**Bon Bon** Oh, guess what, Adagio?

**Both:** We stink! *[the two hug Adagio Dazzle, and then run off, still cheering]* Oh yeah! We're smelly! I reek! Smell me! *[the two run off until they're out of sight]*