Flight Risk (ft. Hey Riddle Riddle!)

Template:Infobox episode

**Flight Risk** is a one-shot bonus episode featuring the members of Hey Riddle Riddle!

Anthony Burch runs the game, Matt Arnold, and Freddie Wong play NPCs, and Adal Rifai, JPC (John Patrick Coan), and Erin Keif are the players.

## Description

Elsewhere in our universe, three hardened criminals (played by the Hey Riddle Riddle crew!) break their way out of a prison transport en route to the Meth Bay Supermax in a one-shot scenario that might seem awfully familiar if you're a Nicholas Cage fan...

## Characters

* Adal Rifai plays "Doctor" Peter Wingspan, an aarakocra rogue whose nickname comes from the fact that he "doctors" fake documents. His head plumage is primarily reddish brown with a white spot at the top of his head and a tattoo on his collarbone that says *Flight Risk.* He was arrested for altering a birth certificate for a troll to make him approximately one year younger.
* JPC plays Granny Zuko, a 74-year-old human cleric arrested for illegal street racing and described as a "woman of the people." She sports gray hair tied back in a bun, reading glasses pushed down to the tip of her nose, and a *Hey Riddle Riddle* tattoo.
* Erin Keif plays Lime LaCroix, a tiefling sorcerer arrested for not taking simple instructions. Her hair, skin, and favorite color are all green. She also has a tattoo that reads *Flight Risk.*
* Matt Arnold as Thumper, a rabbit made of dust who was arrested for killing and eating a bunch of goblins.
* Freddie Wong as Plague, a sentient cloud of undulating green gas.

## Plot Summary

The episode begins with Granny Zuko, and "Doctor" Peter Wingspan waking up in one of a series of locked cages in a long hall with red walls that are wet and glistening. Each of them is wearing a bright orange jumpsuit and a name tag that lists their crime. The cage across from them holds three humanoid piles of meat wearing blue coats with tin stars and Plague, a green cloud of undulating smoke covered by a large transparent jumpsuit. Lime LaCroix wonders aloud if the walls are covered in blood and investigates by tasting them, concluding that the walls are indeed covered in blood but remarking that she "loved it."

Granny Zuko then notices a fourth inmate in the room with them, a large metallic orb whose bottom half is also covered by an orange jumpsuit with a name tag that reads "Ball" and the crime of "Balling" and a *Flight Risk* tattoo, to the chagrin of Peter Wingspan (who thought of himself as a trendsetter). Before they can exchange words, a booming voice announces that the prisoners are *en route* to the Meth Bay Super Max prison to begin their life sentences. Ball immediately remarks that they need to escape, but that the trio must give it a "hit" of puzzle solving in order to free them. Ball then poses them a riddle:

"You can walk when you have four of me, any less don't even try. When you're having fun, you're possessing me; so tell me, what am I?"

Lime LaCroix calls out to the cloud of smoke to flirt and ask for help with the riddle. Before it's able to respond, Lime LaCroix calls out the answer "ball," and Ball frees the party of their restraints. Lime LaCroix immediately kicks Ball, breaking her big toe (as Ball was made of metal) but killing it. Peter Wingspan opens a window to reveal that the party is flying to the Meth Bay Super Max over the mountains. Suddenly, a guard named Jeremy notices that the party has freed themselves from their restraints and instructs the group to restrain themselves again. While Jeremy is distracted, Plague stabs the neck of its jumpsuit with a small sliver of metal, allowing the gas to escape. Plague then enters and assumes control of the three guards around it and calls to the other three prisoners for assistance.

After the guards controlled by Plague pin Jeremy against a wall, Lime LaCroix takes his keys, and Granny Zuko grabs his sword (but offers it to Lime). Plague instructs her to kill the guards, but Granny Zuko convinces Jeremy to devote his life to the Lord, renounce his evil ways of being a prison guard, and come along with them. After Jeremy agrees, Peter Wingspan convinces the other three guards to jump out the window to their deaths after Plague relinquishes control of them.

Plague introduces itself to the group (in a voice reminiscent of Werner Herzog), its name coming from the fact that it is a pestilence that spreads across the land, bringing death and despair to all that it encounters but clarifies that these effects occur according to its will. Liime LaCroix surreptitiously asks Plague to be her boyfriend and he agrees.

Granny Zuko uses Jeremy's keys to open the door to the next room. The room contains three trap doors, a person-sized black box with opaque sides, a large guard, and a translucent cage glowing with blue energy containing Thumper, a rabbit made of dust. The guard notices the party, but makes no move to apprehend them and returns to its watch. As he notices Peter Wingspan examining the trap doors, he informs Peter that one of the doors contains the equipment each of them was carrying when they were arrested, whereas the other two contain something that would harm them. Lime LaCroix thanks the guard, who then informs them that his only job is to keep people out of the black box.

Granny Zuko offers to release Thumper on the condition that he will "play nice" with the gang, and he agrees. Lime LaCroix then charms the guard in order to gain access to the black box, but he resists and directs them to the trap doors, this time saying that two doors lead to the group's items and one contains danger. He then says that after the group points to a door, he will answer a single yes/no question about anything and answer honestly if the door leads to their things. However, if the door that they point to does not contain their belongings, he may either tell the truth or lie at random.

Having seen the difficulty the trio faced in the previous room, Thumper offers to give them the answer, as he saw where the items were placed. Granny Zuko, Peter Wingspan, and Lime LaCroix each wave him off, saying that they want to solve the puzzle themselves, but he tells them that they want to use the left door. They then point to the left door and ask if their items lie behind the middle door, and the guard confirms that they do. Peter Wingspan grasps the middle door and, before opening it, tells Plague and Thumper to "go up to the most beautiful woman you see, and tell her I loved her." He then opens the door to reveal their stuff.

At that moment, Thumper remarks coldly that they chose the wrong door and leaps to attack Peter Wingspan, but he misses and covers it by saying that he tripped. They recover their items and see the entrance to a new room. Granny Zuko turns back to the guard of the black box (whose name is also Jeremy) and asks if they can put Thumper into the box. The second Jeremy says they can't, but they can return him to his original box. As Jeremy is about to reveal that Thumper was trying to kill them, Thumper attempts to put Jeremy to sleep while Plague tries to infect him. He resists falling asleep, but Plague successfully infects him and forces him away from the door to the black box, then instructs the trio to open the box.

Lime LaCroix puts her hand on the door to the black box and feels a rhythmic thumping. She opens the box, revealing a massive red beating heart connected to the floor and ceiling pumping blood throughout the structure enclosing them. Granny Zuko casts "detect evil and good" on the area. She determines that the guard and the heart are lawful "good," being morally black and white on what they consider to be "good". Thumper's alignment is chaotic evil, and Plague is neutral evil.

Granny attempts to pull Peter Wingspan and Lime LaCroix aside to share what she has learned. After Thumper joins the huddle, she reveals that he's evil, that the heart belongs to the creature they're inside, and finally asks what the others think they should do. Meanwhile, Plague attempts to force Jeremy to draw his sword and attack the heart, but he resists. Peter Wingspan answers that he believes they are inside a dragon and that destroying the heart would cause the dragon to plummet to the earth. He suggests that they try to reach the head of the dragon and reason with it. Lime LaCroix comments that stabbing the heart and killing it from the inside would make for a beautiful poem, but Granny Zuko replies by saying that it would most likely kill all of them. She then moves to close the door to the heart.

Thumper tries to attack the heart, but breaks down and hugs it, crying because his entire life has been for nothing. They decide to leave the heart and search for the dragon's brain. Granny Zuko takes Thumper and Plague by the "hands" and pulls them along with the trio.

They proceed into a large chamber containing the lungs and a sword that alternates between its normal state and catching aflame when the room fills with air. Peter Wingspan attempts to grab the sword but fails and singes a wing. Thumper offers to try to get the sword on Granny Zuko's behalf, not wanting her to risk a burn. He successfully snatches it and immediately tries to stab Granny Zuko, who protects herself by casting "shield." She scolds him and throws the sword out of a window, as she detests weapons of violence. Plague then tries to infect the lungs, but Lime LaCroix uses gusts of wind to make him dance instead.

The party then moves into the dragon's mouth where they find two parachutes, a medical kit, and a dragonborn guard (with a *Flight RIsk* tattoo). When they reveal that they're escaped inmates, he responds that it's his job to stop and kill them. During this conversation, Thumper slips away and leaps out with one of the parachutes, leaving only one for either Granny Zuko or Lime LaCroix (Peter Wingspan not needing one as he can fly).

Lime LaCroix uses another gust of wind to send Peter Wingspan soaring up to reach the top of the dragon's head, and the dragonborn guard scrambles up the ladder after him. Peter attempts to convince the dragon to land early and let the other prisoners out. While contemplating what the dragon could do if it abandoned its job with the Super Max prison, it and Peter begin to sing "A Whole New World," causing the people still in the mouth to fall and catch themselves on its teeth. Lime LaCroix uses a fireball to make the dragon cough, sending the parachute flying forward into her grasp. Granny Zuko encourages her to take the parachute, saying that she plans to serve out her sentence as she is indeed guilty of street racing with the T-Birds and that she hopes to help reform other convicts and do good within the prison.

After a deep breath and a heavy sigh, Lime LaCroix hands the parachute to Granny Zuko, who immediately tosses it out of the dragon's mouth, thinking that the gesture meant that Lime wanted to stay in the prison with Granny and the other prisoners. The dragon realizes that there are loose convicts running around, but Peter Wingspan convinces him that he is a guard disguised as a prisoner, though the dragon is convinced that the two prisoners in the mouth are true convicts. The dragon then offers to let them go if Peter can answer a riddle:

"I help a needle do its job. When a hurricane rages, I do not, and I'm about to tell you the answer. What am I?"

Peter Wingspan asks Lime LaCroix and Granny Zuko if they heard the riddle, to which Granny Zuko responds "aye" and Lime LaCroix scratches her eye, prompting Peter Wingspan to realize that the answer is "eye/I." As Peter delivers the answer, he slams a talon into one of the dragon's eyes, causing it to crash into a canyon wall and plummet to the earth, paralyzing it. It asks for the name of their gang, and Peter tells him to look for the folks with the *Flight Risk* tattoo, knowing that could mean any of millions of people.