June 2021 Thornton Revolution

The 2021 Thornton Revolution occurred on the 2nd of June 2021, in response to Jebidiah Thornton calling the NHS ''A useless waste of money.'' The workers of Thornton Stationery had become fed up with Jebidiah's fascistic reign of terror and decided to finally do something about it. It was fought between The Thornton Employees, The Thorntoniers and The Thornton Assassins.

## 2021 Thornton Revolution

### Location

West London
East London

Thornton Towers

Cumbria

Manchester

Ha Noi

KU-Kanpur University

Unlike other attempts to take power away from Jebidiah, this revolution was successful and resulted in Jebidiah's resignation as CEO and self-exile.

## Background

Jebidiah became CEO in March of 1995, and his power began festering in 1998, when he first banned Thornton Branches from spending anymore company money. Jebidiah quickly became a nasty tyrant who revealed himself to be a conservative borderline Fascist hater of democracy. This all came to a summit in December 2019, when Montgomery Thornton was tracked down by the workers of Kensington & Chelsea Branch.

## Beginning

Denzel Pepper re-united the Denzel Pepper Detective Agency to work along side Montgomery Thornton and help him gain power. Denzel was assisted by the great mind of Fred Wentsworth, the cunning of Julia Santiago, the ambition and raw strength of Bernard Smith, the cool and calculated wit of Tim Crescent and the sheer kinkiness of Cecil Longstaff. The Operation to assist Montgomery was delayed due to the spread of Covid-19, and operations temporarily came to a halt in March 2020. Operations resumed one year later, in April 2021, and the branch was now joined by millionaire Darius Wiggleton who had friends in high places. The gang that would later become The Boys in Blue consisting of Jasper Scunthorpe, Alfred Lennie, Wilfred Pebble and DeSaad Pepper had also been collaborating with the DPDA.

On the 29th April 2021, the DPDA had invited other powerful employees to help with the revolution, including the Claypan Gang, The Sylvia Petrov Sisterhood of Nuns, The Black and Pink Legs Mafia, BATTY, as well as many other branches, including the Norwich Branch, the Torquay Branch, the Manchester Branch, and every branch in London.

## Build-Up

Heavy preparations were made, Lucius Fox created a fake dating profile on the online platform Discord, which Jebidiah made all employees use during lockdown, to reel in Jebidiah and distract him from the workers doing anything odd. The DPDA did not let anyone in the Westminster Corporate Branch know of the plans, other than Thomas Campbell - their man on the inside. Vincent Valentine flew out to KU-Kanpur University and gathered the KU-Kanpur University Militia to combat the Thornton Assassins. By early May 2021, there had been rumors that someone was selling information to the Thornton Assassins. Cecil Longstaff flew to Ha Noi, where he assisted the Ha Noi branch of the company to take over the Vietnam Headquarters of the company.

Patrick Jones had been training the Cub Scouts very heavily, and they would often get 1 hour of sleep a night. Jason Dandelion and Mr. Muttley were forced to co-operate with the Claypan Gang, their former rivals. However, this collaboration turned the two into allies. Wiggleton C.O. began manufacturing bullet-proof fox fur coats to keep the cub-scouts warm in case of battle.

On the 17th May 2021, Jebidiah heard news of the revolution, and informed Domnul Mihai, the feared Romanian disciplinarian to come to the UK and assist him. Mihai entered the Lambeth Branch with a whip in his hands. Little did he know, the Lambeth Branch was protected by the Thornton Cub Scouts. Mihai attempted to attack Doody Morgan, however was beaten with an Iron Ramrod by Patrick Jones, who had began calling himself Colonel General Patrick Jones. Mihai was held hostage, and Jasper Scunthorpe filmed a video containing four masked men (DeSaad Pepper, Wilfred Pebble, Alfred Lennie and Bernard Smith) threatening to beat up Mihai if Jebidiah didn't resign from his position.

Meanwhile, in Vietnam, Cecil was ordered by Patrick Jones to storm the Vietnam Headquarters and cut off any communication. The KU-Kanpur University Militia assisted Cecil, and captured the 12 floor Headquarters in less than an hour. Cecil Longstaff and Dr. Charanjeet Singh entered the building first. Cecil held a crazed look in his eyes, and began a grizzly roar. The receptionist was frozen with fear and Cecil said ''I AM THE KINK-MASTER, YOU WILL NOT GO AGAINST ME!'' Cecil then jumped onto the receptionist and began screaming at him until he went deaf. Vincent Valentine broke into the top floor of the building with Tammanah Monty and captured the IT workers. The rest of the Militia quickly invaded the other floors.

In Whitby, the Claypans and the Dandelions had been working to find out any opposition to the revolution, and located eight workers. Jacquees and Jason set off to Bristol to defeat the employee who had been selling information to the Thorntoniers, whilst Hugo Higgins and Mr. Muttley travelled to Cumbria to help take-down a Cumbrian Thornton Loyalist.

### Jacquees and Jason

Upon arriving to the Bristol Branch, they raided the H.R. Department to find out the name and address of the employee who had been selling the information. Jacquees Higgins has requested that his name not be revealed. Jason and Jacquees invaded his house and placed him under citizens arrest. Jacquees got a bit carried away and shot him 238 times with the Claypan Branded Nerf Gun (a semi-automatic Nerf Gun with the Claypan logo painted on). The man was slapped 173 times by Jason Dandelion until he told us the location and names of the Thorntoniers. The man was tied up and taken to Cumbria by Jason. Jacquees went to track down the Thorntonier on his own. It had been revealed that the Bristol Thorntonier was located in Za Za Bazaar (an all you can eat buffet restaurant in Bristol). Jacquees performed a quadruple front flip and knocked out the Thorntonier with his powerful legs. The people at Za Za Bazaar looked on in silent shock, until someone said they were calling the police. Jacquees knocked him out and told him to fuck off.

### Hugo and Mr. Muttley

In Cumbria, Mr. Muttley stopped at the home of one of his good friends: Robert Warburton, a feared Cumbria-based Landlord, and former accountant at the Penrith Branch. Warburton agreed to help them take down the Cumbrian Jebidiah Loyalist. They acquired the address of the worker from Bruce from IT. Robert Warburton broke down his door, and went into his room, where he found him in bed with a prostitute. Warburton woke him up and choke slammed him out of the window. The Cumbrian Jebidiah Loyalist (who was discovered to be wanted internationally for terrorism) was sent to Warburton's house, where he was forced to fight in a WWE style match with Robert. Robert set the ring on fire and destroyed the loyalist.

### The First Thornton Stationery Aerial Fight

See. The First Thornton Stationery Aerial Fight.

## The Revolution

On the 22nd of May, In Mile End, Vlad Petrov and his mafia set up camp outside of Jebidiah's house. When Jebidiah exited his house, he was taken by Vlad. Vlad stared deep into Jebidiah's eyes, which mentally scarred Jebidiah. This is when the revolution officially began. Jebidiah rang the Thorntoniers, however they were easily defeated by Vlad's mafia, who were experienced criminals.

In Hammersmith, Denzel Pepper and Tim Crescent re-united to create a complex and intriguing trap to capture Jebidiah's VIP's - a group of men who were very loyal to Jebidiah. Tim Crescent had brought his weapons, including his crossbow with mercury injected arrows, and his Gatling gun. Sylvia Petrov arrived 2 hours later to help Denzel and Tim, which she and her sisterhood did. They also recruited 14 new people to their sisterhood. Three Thornton Assassins attempted to capture Denzel, however two were shot by Tim Crescent, and one was booted in the face by Denzel's three inch heel.

In the HQ Building in Westminster, Thomas Campbell announced that Jebidiah was to be overthrown, and whoever disagreed was to be beaten by the Cub Scouts. Lucius Fox, Phil de'MonteCarlo and Mark Wilkes were sent to the corporate branch as well, to ensure smooth operations. Thomas Campbell gave the following speech:

''All my fucking life, I've waited to do something important, something worthwhile, something after which I can finally look my little boy in the eyes and said ''I did something with my life.'' And this is it, this is that moment. You fucking degenerates DISGUST me! Instead of being a reporter for the BBC on the frontlines, I work for a company that pays me MINIMUM WAGE for 87 HOURS A WEEK. That won't be the case anymore. When people look in the Thornton history books, they will see my name. My fucking name. And you'll all be forgotten, you street rats.''

Lucius, Phil and Mark immediately applauded this speech of epic proportions.

In Manchester, Æðelstan Fairburne fortified the Branch Building, and slayed the legs of four Thornton Assassins. He screamed ''THIS IS FOR WESLEY'' in reference to his loyal donkey, Wesley Blackmane who unfortunately passed away in 2019. The Assassins were terrified by the prowess of the employees, and backed down.

Jebidiah managed to get away, however was stopped when he boarded a boat to Northern Ireland, when the captain of the ship - Leopold Calvert-Bellingham, good friend of Denzel Pepper and Regional Manager of the Cork Branch spotted him. Leopold took him into the basement, where his crew of Neo-Pirates sat. The pirates beat up Jebidiah and held him hostage.

On the 2nd of June 2021, Jebidiah was brought to Whitehall, where he was publicly forced to resign with Nerf Gun-Point to his head. Montgomery Thornton was established as the new CEO, minutes later. Jasper Scunthorpe was going to sue Jebidiah on behalf of the whole company, however Jebidiah ran away to Thornton Towers, where he managed to reach the Helipad. Denzel Pepper, Lucius Fox and Jasper Scunthorpe followed him, and fought in the name of Nicholas Von Igoreviche, the man who started the fire of the revolution. Denzel performed martial arts on Jebidiah, who was heavily wounded. Lucius Fox was shot in the gut by Jebidiah, who began laughing. Jasper and Denzel ran to see if Lucius was okay, however Jebidiah got in his helicopter and escaped. It is suspected he is currently in a small Scottish Island.

## The Aftermath

All pro-Jebidiah employees were fired and replaced with new employees. The yearly wage increased to 54k a year, and Thornton Stationery gained several new shareholders. For now, Thornton Stationery is safe from The Thornton Assassins, Thorntoniers and Jebidiah.