Episode 32: Dawn's Wicked Stepsister

The episode for "Dawn's Wicked Stepsister" was originally released on October 3, 2016. **You can listen to it here.** This episode is 48:08 long.This week's ghostwriter: none.

*Previous:* Episode 31: Mary Anne and the Great Romance | *Next:* Episode 33: Kristy and the Secret of Susan | *Or,* see all episodes.

## Official Episode Description

And it came to pass that Dawn and Mary Anne didn't enjoy sharing a bedroom as much as they thought they would. And Dawn in her righteousness did take the socks of Mr. Spier and pair them in such a way that they might be odd. And Jack and Tanner did look upon what Dawn had wrought, and they did pronounce it the sickest of burns. Also, things get kind of spooky, so maybe listen to this one with the lights on. Why the hell were you listening in the dark anyway?

## Music Credits

* "Devastation and Revenge,” by Kevin MacLeod, CC
* “The Dusty Attic,” by ErikMMusic, CC
* “Corporate Music for Inspiring Product Presentation,” by Baumann Music, CC
* “Dubstep Dance,” by Kierpm96, CC
* Original Intro by Scott Lamb
* Superbrat Outro by Superbrat

## Ann's Epithets

Princeton’s own princess, Ann Matthews Martin, royalty in the American literary canon.

## Book Description

Jack admits his intro is a paragraph and not a sentence. Jack’s intro is fairly straightforward about the drama within the book.

"When a minor territory dispute turns into a major turf war, the peaceful town of Stonebrook is rocked to its core by a vicious blood fued that threatens to destroy a family, a community, and an entire way of life. This riveting tale of revenge, bitterness, and violent grudges will force you to take sides in the untold story of the most contentious family rivalry since the Hatfields and the McCoys. Is blood thicker than water? Is there a line that even sworn vengence should never cross? Should Dawn have just turned the fucking radio down when Mary Ann said she needed to study? Find out the answers to these burning questions in Dawn, and the Wicked Stepsister."

Tanner barely finishes the description.

## Segments

###  Burn Of The Week

Tanner: “Fakeout on my grandparents.”

Jack: Claudia’s standing on her head to try and get smarter instead of studying. “I’m lightheaded, is this how it feels to be a genius?” “No!” yells Janine.

Jack: Dawn rearranging Mr. Spier’s sock drawer.

###  Claudia's Closet

She’s wearing her pink dress, the short one, earrings that look like globes, and a necklace I made from candy. She looks like Princess Lolli from the Candyland board game.

###  Great American Novel of the Week

Great Aramaic Novel of the Week, where Jack makes Tanner guess if a quote is from this book or the Bible.

###  Tanner Googles

Tanner looks up a line from Leviticus about eating bacon (animals with cloven hooves).

Tanner Googles Super Special #1 to find out if the boy in it is named Will. (It’s not, that boy was “Tim”. “Will” is actually from BSCSC 002: Baby-Sitters' Summer Vacation.

###  Tearful Moment

Tanner doesn’t pay attention to Jack’s description because he’s finding a tearful moment. His moment is when Dawn and Kristy hug one another.

Jack gets emotional on planes. He references the moment when Mrs. Schafer is petting Tigger asleep on her lap. “I like having my new family.”

## Theories

###  Witchcraft

As far as this book is concerned, Mary Anne has had a verifiable experience of haunting. She seeks comfort in the dark master of demons Logan Bruno, who has some plans for Stoneybrook.

## Jack's References

* ”This book is immoral.”
* It’s a Dawn book, so of course Jack describes the book as “deeply religious”. “Am I my sister’s keeper?” This book is of course, the story of Cain and Abel.
* Jack tries to intro a new segment “Kristy is Steve Jobs”.
* When trying to convince Tanner not to Google, Jack does a McElroy “unless…”
* Romeo and Juliet
* Macaulay Culkin in *The Good Son*. Jack and Tanner say they lose 90% of the audience, and then try to explain who Culkin is.

## Tanner's References

* Tanner says ‘plague’ wrong and references “28 Days Later” in the context of the sickness in this book, saying that Mary Anne and Dawn both have the same rage virus.
* Dawn is Jesus and will ascend to heaven (California).
* Tanner wants to be “Stand by Me”’d when he dies.

## Notes

* ”The Prophecy”: the sat will become the sitter; and in this book, sitter becomes the sat.
* Callback to Episode 2: Claudia and the Phantom Phone Calls re: Janine’s IQ
* The Bet is referenced again, with Tanner worried that he will have to wear The Outfit.
* Mr Spier is sociopathic and serves his vegetarian wife bacon. "Go *from* him." The boys long for her to return to Trip-Man, who will surely indulge her vegetarian lifestyle.

## References & Links

1. ↑ https://mbmbam.wikia.com/wiki/%22Brotherisms%22

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