Tim Hein

Tim Hein ("the Tommyball Princess," "Uncaped Crusader," "Crooked Captain," "Traralgon Tattletale," "the man who put the T and M in Tommyball," and "the Taylor Swift of Tommyball" in reference to all innovative artists at once) is a retired Tommyball player and coach who was especially noted for his revolutionary use of weapons in play. He currently commentates over Tommyball and co-hosts the wildly popular podcast Tommyball with Brady Haran, who described his career with the words, “Integrity. Innovation. Internet.” He is known for re-writing his autobiography and releasing each edition under a slightly different, but similar, title. His nationality has been noted as "Oprah-like." He has an assistant named Barry.

Hein has advocated for banning players' weapons, but not spectator's weapons, in the midst of play. The players would be allowed to use weapons during the half-time break. Hein criticizes modern Tommyball's use of weapons, which has "become a game" in itself, led to injuries, and led to degradation of the sport. In addition, he argues that spectators should be allowed to use weapons, as it is a critical component of self-expression and punishment.

Hein has unsuccessfully attempted to legally change the name of Tommyball to Timmyball.

## Notable Accomplishments

* 13-times runner up in Super Cup final
* 9-times runner up League MVP
* Scored 37,000+ doowacky points
* MySpace poll named him second greatest player of the 1990s
* *Tommyball Tribune:* “Man who left a mark on the game that will never be forgotten, no matter how hard we try”
* The only player ever to be sent off twice in the same game for inappropriate conduct

Due to rule changes, Hein's point totals are worth more than modern scores of the same number.

### Commentating

On 14 January 2012, John Climinock scored a legendary goal that has become famous even outside of Tommyball.

Hein was commentating at the time. His commentary, especially his exclamation, "Beauty!" have become iconic themselves. "Beauty!" remains a popular phone ringtone. Hein has the audio set as his doorbell tone.

## Traralgon Titans' Open Top Bus Tour Through the Streets of Traralgon and Related Areas in Rural Victoria

As coach, Hein led the Traralgan Titans to a narrow Super Cup victory in 2010. The celebration, an open top bus tour, was a scene of "unbridled joy."

In a 2019 interview, Hein would compare the feeling as similar to Beatlemania, but with even more people involved. The bus took the team as far as the Loy Yang Power Station and Peak Hill Open Cut Mine. Photographs of bus in front of the power station would become such iconic images of the decade that the power station commissioned a mural of the photograph to be added to the power station itself. Onlookers have expressed a feeling of "wonder" seeing a mural of a power station on a power station.

On the anniversary of the open bus tour, Hein can be seen weeping or meditating at the power station.

Hein has admitted to holding the Tommyball trophy, against tradition.

Hein fell out with the coaching staff the following season.

## Tim Hein Legend Stand Corporate Box

The Tim Hein Legend Stand Corporate Box has sofa chairs provided by the Sofa Shop. Following a March 2019 incident, Hein was banned from his own corporate box. Although Hein's lawyers pointed out the irony, the court's ruling was upheld.

## Autobiography

Tim has revealed his autobiography, *My Lives: A Life in Tommyball and Tommyball Commentating*, in which he discusses his experiences with both playing and commentating over Tommyball. Controversially, he released *My Lives* on the same day as longtime rival Fred Dickerson's funeral.

Revenue from the autobiography will go toward the Tim Hein wing of the Tommyball Museum.

1. ↑ https://www.unmade.fm/episodes/special-tommyball-decade
2. ↑ https://www.unmade.fm/episodes/special-tommyball