Beiinors Campaign/Session 17

## [ Session 17 — 10/01/2023 ]

“What do we got this week?”

“uhhhh..... Shopping episode.”

“FUCK NO”

“Fuck no? I figure you’d say *fuck yes*?”

“Dude that’s why Steve got fired.”

“Wait, *what*? No fucking way!”

“Yeah dude, he fucking took those pages to Dave and Dave *fucking fired him*.”

“Wait what? What the fuck?”

“Yeah, he said it was because 'we just had one two episodes ago'.”

“Well fuck... I guess that’s true but... but damn, I really didn’t think...”

“I know man, nobody did... Just do your time, then you can go write for Storage Wars or whatever.”

“Yeah dude. *Survivor* money.”

“*Survivor money*.”

...

*\*Evening at Sempso Manner. CharlesGorth, Katamira, Maria, Bolt, and Paavo are gathered in the library\**

Paavo: “So, we tried to get him declared incompetent but he somehow fucked that up too. He kept trying to bribe the guards for some reason. But it’s almost like he failed a skill check or something, because they just got more and more angry.”

CharlesGorth: “Whoa.”

Paavo: “Yeah. Anyways, I haven’t slept in like three days, so I’m going to get some basic food and go to bed.”

CharlesGorth: “You haven’t eaten? Let me get the chef, he’ll make you something delicious *\*motions to butler\** “

Paavo: “Actually that’s ok... I really just want some simple food.”

CharlesGorth: “Oh ok... he can make you some average food then.”

Paavo: “Thanks.”

...

“Ok, that’s probably good for now. Let’s just sketch out the rest.”

“Sure.”

“Alright so, Sarkan has to visit because otherwise, a bunch of nerds are going to be angry at us for never doing anything with him.”

“Yeah so, we can’t do that to the story can we? That would be bad.”

“Probably the only thing worse than getting fired for a shopping episode would be getting fired for doing that.”

“Yeah... sooo I guess CharlesGorth enchants something before bed, and Katamira gets another sending stone message.”

“Anything cool?”

“Not..... really”

“Yeah ok.”

~~~

*\*On the precipice of Ozymandias’ trial, the party trudges through Qendra on a dour, grey morning. Ozymandias is led to the courthouse in chains.*

*\*Fade forward - Ozy is getting excoriated on the stand by the captain of the guard, who is simultaneously disgusted, but piteous and curious to the nature of Ozymandias’ ignorance.*

~~~

Magistrate: Is there any other party here today who wishes to speak on behalf of the defendant? As a reminder, they are facing six months in prison at the very least for their crimes.

*\*The crowd is absolutely silent. Just as the magistrate looks down to read their verdict, Paavo stands up. \**

Paavo: “Your honor, if I can say anything, it should be this. You are about to sentence a man to prison who really has committed no other crime than being laughably, clumsily, and almost unforgivably stupid. But that’s no reason to keep him off the streets. Instead, take away what he’s attached to, and banish him from the city. Let this stupidity be kept outside the city walls. We could all use a break from it.”

*\*A pregnant pause fills the room\**

*\*Captain Andersen sighs, then nods toward the magistrate\**

Magistrate: As much as I have a wholesale desire to beat the insolence out of you, Ozymandias, I will be lenient. You are hereby fined one hundred gold; you are furthermore banned from conducting any business activity within the city of Qendra for six months. Finally, you are ordered to immediately cease all activity related to the “GorthBoi Clique” inside the city walls.

...

“Ok, so, they go back to the manor, dot dot dot... We can have Charles yell at Ozy, that should be funny... “

“Where are they going next?”

“Hmm, I guess they could do the trafficking ring, they have to visit TIME, and I guess the sending stones and the fae stuff”

“Well I guess Hypox is on the way to Farithlin City, few birds with one stone.”

“Sure, yeah.”

…

“Oh shit, one problem.”

“What?”

“Paavo is from Hypox.”

“Aww dude, I didn’t wanna do a fucking origin story right now!”

“Well, at least he has a cool one?”

“What, he burned his friends or something?”

“Yeah, but we can do a whole thing where they come back and terrorize him. This is DND remember.”

“Ah ok, so he has like PTSD.”

“Yeah, but what we’re gonna do is, we’ll have them rolling into Hypox. Paavo *was* anxious about this before - so we can actually make it so that the party gets him some sort of relief for his neuroses, and even a little thing like they’re growing closer together, and then...”

“What?”

“You don’t know? We can tie this into the fae stuff.”

“Oh reeeeeaaaaally... Wow, that’s clever dude, I didn’t even think about the rising and falling action like that.”

“Yeah well, you can tell right - you just have to arrange everything well, and you can get a lot of suspense without trying too hard.”

“So basically, it’s good to bring them to emotional extremes before we drop major plot points?”

“Kind of... you really have to have some lighter moments and some heavier ones but try to arc it together. Keep the audience in mind - they don’t want 20 episodes of *Ozy’s crazy party*, but they don’t need *Band of Brothers* either. Also, you don’t want to fatigue the audience by making the show needlessly dark, it gets kitschy after a while.”

“hmm... true”

“It’s actually why we can *afford* to have shopping episodes every once in a while; it’s not like they’re doing *nothing*, but it’s part of falling action, which makes it even better when we come through with a crazy fight or some fae plot lines.”

“hmmm... So Dave really didn’t need to-“

“No dude, of course not! Fuck Dave; he doesn’t know his head from his asshole and that’s why he spews so much shit.”

...

*\*On the trail to Hypox, the party navigates through a stretch of treacherous terrain. At camp that night, the party rests around a fire.\**

Charlesgorth: Ah, finally! It’s done.

Katamira: What do you have there?

Charlesgorth A *Ring of Feather Fall*. I’m just thinking it will come in handy when—

Paavo: "It's good that you made that, *you never know when you're going to need it up in the mountains...*"

“Hahahahahahaha, that’s fucking hilarious”

“Fuck Paavo dude.”

“Fuck Paavo.”