DJ The Unfriendly Ghost/Transcript

This article is a transcript of the Timepants episode "DJ The Unfriendly Ghost" from Season 1 which was created on February 16th 2021.

*[Episode begins with an outside shot of DJ's disco house]*

**DJ Grooves:** Have I ever told you how... gorgeous you look? Your flippers... Your afro... Your shades are... a little lopsided... *[DJ fixes them]* Ah! There... And now that I am immortalised in wax! This new statue of me will be fitting for my upcoming movie!

*[A very loud crash can be heard outside, which causes DJ to frown as well as his wax sculpture]*

**Joshy:** Hike Serene! Hike!

*[Joshy and Serene run off in different dirctions, with Joshy lifting a heavy boulder as Serene crouches down and is blowing a Queen across a chessboard, Joshy eventually drops the rock under a tree which splits into halves]*

**Joshy:** You just lost three points! *[Joshy leaps up the tree]* One! Two! Five!! *[Joshy is upside down and creats a bubble that spells "G7"] G7!!*

**Serene:** G7!? *[Looks at chessboard and drops it]* King me!! King me!!! *[Serene dashes and hits the tree, popping the bubble and collecting a Pokeball from the tree]* I lose!!

**Joshy:** But it's not **Tuesday** Serene!

**Serene:** Darn...

*[DJ looks out of his window]*

**DJ:** Excuse me!? I apologise if this is a rude eavesdrop but what are you two doing out here!?

**Joshy and Serene:** *[Looks at each other]* (Both) We don't know...

**DJ:** Hey Serene darling? Do you know what time it is?

**Serene:** *[her hair is messed up and she's acting all flustered]* U-Uh yeah DJ Grooves, it's... *[she checks her laptop but her screen is completely white and cannot tell the time]*

**DJ: *Time*** to find some other game to play!? [DJ laughs heartily as he starts playing some music to relax to as he gets into his bath]

**Joshy:** *[leaps down from tree]* Well... Now what?

**Serene:** We can toss that frisbee back and forth

**Joshy:** Okay! *[picks up frisbee from ground and tosses at Serene]* Ready...

*[Serene catches it, but lets off a very strong and powerful throw]*

**Serene:** Go!!!

**Joshy:** I got it! I got it! I got it! I got it!!

*[The frisbee flies into DJ Groove house and knocks over DJ's wax sculpture of himself, DJ hears something in the other room but ignores it. The duo go up into DJ's house to get their frisbee back.]*

**Joshy:** Okay Serene, finders keepers...

**Serene:** There it is! *[she points to the frisbee in the sculpture's head]*

**Joshy and Serene:** (both) I got it! I got it! I got it!

**Serene:** *[Pulls the frisbee from the sculpture's head]* Bonus points!

*[Joshy notices something wrong]*

**Joshy:** Uh... Serene? I think there's something wrong with DJ... He looks unconscious...

*[The sculpture is laying on the ground with a huge indent in it's head from the frisbee]*

**Serene:** (confidently) Don't worry... **I** know how to do **this...** *[Animal Crossing changing sound as Serene changes into a lifeguard's swimsuit]*

*[Serene takes a deep breath and performs CPR on the wax sculpture, she splutters and her cheeks are going purple. Serene takes another deep breath and blows again, but her face turns blue as she inflates like a balloon, she lets out all the air and deflates, eventually landing on the sculpture's head as she eventually changes back to her skirt and sweater]*

**Joshy:** Get off him Serene!!

**Serene:** *[is blushing]* W-What are you worried about!? He looks better already!

*[The sculpture's head is flat and Serene's butt is imprinted on the sculpture's face]*

**Joshy:** But he still looks cold... *[Both of them lift the sculpture up]*

**Serene:** Well lets go put him in the warm!

*[Joshy and Serene move the sculpture over to a window, emitting very warm sunbeams]*

**Joshy:** Do you think he'll be okay Serene...? *[As he says this, the sculpture begins to melt]*

**Serene:** You know you worry too much... The lifeguard is here! And Joshy... I know a **lot** about head injuries, believe... *[Serene starts to blush and drool, as she's too distracted thinking about Conductor and DJ, until Joshy snaps his fingers]* **Me!** *[Serene looks down]* Hey... What's that on your foot...?

*[Joshy looks down]*

**Joshy:** Ew... I don't know... It looks an awful lot like...

*[They both realise that the sculpture has melted and start to panic]*

**Joshy and Serene:** (both) **DJ!!!!**

*[The dysfunctional duo starts running around in panic as DJ is shown powdering his beak with talcum powder as he's covered in towels in the other room, cut to the duo trying to remend the sculpture as it melts.]*

**Joshy:** No no! That part goes here!

**Serene:** Y-Yeah! That's it! U-uh-huh!

**Joshy:** Y-Yeah!! Almost there!

**Serene:** It's working! It's working!

**Joshy:** This is working! This is working!

*[The sculpture proceeds to melt all together]*

**Joshy: SERENE THIS ISN'T WORKING!!**

**Serene: LOOK!!**

*[The eyes of the sculpture proceed to turn over as it symbolises death]*

**Joshy:** I-I... I don't even know how to say this... but... our... old pal DJ... he's... he's... He's pushing up daisies... *[Joshy starts crying]*

**Serene:** *[sighs in relief]* Phew... I thought he was dead.

*[DJ then steps out of his bathroom all covered in white towels and talcum powder, which frightens Joshy and Serene as they both cling to each other, until DJ sees them.]*

**DJ:** AHHH!! What are you two darlings doing invading on my property!?

*[Joshy and Serene are so scared that they are speechless]*

**DJ**: Well!? Are you gonna say anything-

**Joshy:** NO STAY BACK!

**DJ**: What is the matter with you two!?

**Serene:** D-Don't hurt us!

**Joshy:** It was an accident!!

DJ: W-What are you two talking abou-

*[DJ then steps in his remains of his wax sculpture]*

**DJ: AHHHHH!!!! LOOK WHAT YOU DONE TO ME!!!** (Angrily) Oh... when I GET MY HANDS ON YOU TWO I'LL-

**Joshy:** (tearfully) Please DJ! Spare us from your ghostly anger! *[he bows down to him]*

**Serene:** Oh yes DJ Groove's ghost! Please don't haunt us... *[she is kissing DJ's cheeks]*

**Joshy:** We'll give you anything you want! PLEASE JUST HAVE MERCY ON U-US...

*[DJ starts grinning evily and has an idea]*

**DJ:** Enough!! Listen up... *[the duo stops crying and is not scared]* DJ Groove's ghost is feeling unusually generous today... He hath decided to spare ye a horrible fate..... All you must do is tend to my every whim and tickle my fancy on demand...

**Joshy:** D-Does that mea-

**DJ: QUIET!!** Now do as you're told... **Or suffer the** **wrath... Of DJ........** *[hisses scarily as he shuffles away]*

**Serene:** *[whispers to Joshy]* I think they make a cream for that now.

*[Cuts to the outside of DJ's disco house as Joshy and Serene are dressed as Moon Penguins carrying DJ out on a throne/bed]*

~WIP~ (Will get this finished tomorrow)

-J. The Sobble