Danger Rangers! - Chapter Three

> "*I'm sure that when he betrays us and tries to murder all three of us and free his friends and go on kidnapping animals that your trust in a prisoner will save you.*"
> ― Irene Dubois
>
>

**Danger Rangers! - Chapter Three: "Glamazons Gone Wild"** is the sixty-first episode of Queens of Adventure. In it, novice rangers Bosco and Irene take their prisoners to the ranger station, and encounter more wildlife.

## Synopsis

A half day's journey away from Glamalala, musk otter Petty Labelle swims happily near rainbow frogs, after being released by novice rangers Bosco and Irene Dubois. The novices had freed various animals from poachers, and on the advice of some Inquirers, have decided to take the unconscious lizardfolk poacher to the nearest ranger station, alongside junior ranger Jort.

They set up a small camp for a short rest before setting out. After an hour, Irene smacks their prisoner awake. He begs them to let him go, and says the ship coming for him could take them anywhere. Irene, who has always wanted to leave the city, knows this path would make her an outlaw.

He explains that the Army of the Fist destroyed their village, leaving them broke and unable to make enough food. He is hear to sell the animals to the Army when they return so they spare his village. Irene suggests asking the Glamazons for help, but Jort thinks they've only survived through isolation and wouldn't be likely to help. Bosco agrees. The novices decide to try bringing him to justice still, and duct tape his mouth shut.

As they prepare to leave, arrows fire at them from the dwarven poachers, hitting Bosco. They say they need Komodo's ship to leave, and so have come to get him.

Bosco exchanges bow fire with a dwarf, Bosco's misses. Jort runs at the dwarf with a sword, and manages to hit him, despite his new-to-combat panic. Irene attacks him with her great ax, knocking him out with the flat end. Bosco recovers with a *second wind* and whips the remaining dwarf, who tries to fight back but misses. Jort knocks the dwarf out.

Irene ties the three prisoners up in a line. She and Bosco decide to gag and blindfold the prisoners. They search the prisoners, finding only crossbows, clubs, and short swords on them. Jort gives them directions, up the Humble Hills to the Proud Peaks, along the trail to the dangling boulders of Cliffhanger Crest. He can't seem to figure out where east is though, nor does Irene, but Bosco does.

Heading up the hills, they hear squeaks from the bushes. Jort kicks it, and several dickpigs emerge. They have deer like bodies but the head of a pig. Most are young, and one adult comes out, with large antlers, who stamps at Jort. Irene draws their attention as Bosco checks the squealing in the bush. She finds a baby dicklet in a wooden cage with matted bloody fur. Irene unblindfolds Komodo and asks if this was his doing. He confesses and she reblindfolds him. Bosco frees it. The big one, thinking Bosco is a poacher, charges her. She dodges, and set the dicklet down. It returns to the other kids as the daddy turns around to charge, before Irene distracts him with their lizardfolk prisoner. The dickpigs depart.

Bosco ungags Komodo long enough to get him to confess this is as far out that they set traps (as Jort twirls and drops his mace).

The group ascends the hill northeast above the treelines. Bosco admires the view of the volcanic western mountains and the Diamond Sea. Soon they find a three rope monkey bridge over a ravine. The novices debate how to escort the prisoners, who are bound, across. They decide to barely trust Jort with Komodo as they cross over with the unbound dwarves, but Jort ungags him and begs for water. After a drink, Komodo tries to convince Jort to take charge, leaving them ungagged and unbound to help defend the group. Irene returns in time to hear the offer to serve Jort. Irene regags him, but tells Jort to untie him so they can cross the bridge, while she holds her spear to Komodo's back.

As they cross, the rangers begin to slip, but Komodo grabs them both and steadies them. Once they cross, Jort says they should leave him untied, but Irene insists on retying him. Bosco is unsure. Irene agrees to leave him untied but let it be on Jort's head if things go wrong.

The group crosses over the top of the Proud Peaks as night falls. Overhead they hear the sound of wings as a red wyvern flies by. It is a far way off, but on their path and their exposed on the ridge line, except for a few outcroppings.

Irene pulls out one of the confiscated bows, and anoints an arrow tip with some pheromones from beneath her neck flaps (and entices Komodo at the same time). She fires the bow, but the bow is poorly made, snaps, and the arrow lands in the dirt sixty feet away. The wyvern sniffs it and descends. Irene starts to approach, despite Bosco and Jort's warning, and releases more pheromones. The wyvern charges and knocks her down, and writhes on her. Irene tries to spit a pheromone covered loogie away from her, but it hits the wyvern's face, to his enjoyment.

Bosco decides to intervene and whips the wyvern, who looks up at the rest of the group. Jort hides behind a tree as Bosco asks for help. Komodo draws a purple vile the group missed when searching him, and calls it Toad Rush (Bosco calls it Magic Poppers), the substance they drugged the animals with. As she stealths up, Irene decides to bite with her *hungry jaws*, hoping the wyvern is into it. It is. Bosco ties the Toad Rush vile to her whip and swings it. Instead of the wyvern, it hits Irene's face and shatters. The mist sprays both Irene and the wyvern.

Both are now relaxed, and the wyvern begins to cuddle Irene. An egg pops out and it falls asleep.

The group regathers and thanks Komodo, and keep Jort away from the egg (which Irene names Ag). Surprisingly he hasn't let the dwarves get away.

Irene scratches the wyvern lovingly as a remembrance as the group walks off to find somewhere safe to take another short rest.

To Be Continued..

### Characters

#### Party

* Bosco - shadar-kai fighter
* Irene Dubois - lizardfolk barbarian

#### NPCs

* Ranger Jort
* Komodo with the Bright Eyes
* Dwarf Poachers

#### Animals

* Petty Labelle (Muskotter)
* Rainbow frogs
* Dickpigs

## Episode Notes

### Lore

* The Army of the Fist continues to operate on the mainland, raiding and destroying villages.

### Memorable Quotes

* "I know, it's terrible being imprisoned against your will." - "Oh yes, very ironic." - Irene Dubois and Komodo
* "Have you applied for a grant?" - Bosco
* "What's your safeword?" - uninteligible gagged response. "Didn't catch that. Here's the blindfold!" - Bosco and prisoners
* "It's good for you to feel useful." - Irene Dubois
* "I know how to speak dick pig, okay?" - Irene Dubois
* "We can tie them to the handrails and slide them across." - "That sounds like a terrible idea." - Irene Dubois and Bosco
* "Whoda thought these dwarves would be so nimble. If I didn't hate them, I'd be impressed." - Irene Dubois
* "In what way? What drama are we in need of assistance with?" - "Plot" - Irene Dubois and Bosco
* "Do wyverns have arms? This one does. It's a mutant." - DM James
* "If I had known these dice rolls were going to be this terrible I wouldn't have done this." - Irene Dubois

### References

* Doublemint gum
* Snap, Crackle, Pop - Rice Krispie mascots
* Keebler Elf - cookie mascots
* Lion King
* Instagram filters
* CATS the movie, and Taylor Swift

## Behind the Queens

* Irene recorded the "Previously on" part of the intro for the first time.
* In the mid-episode break, James thanks backers for submitting names for future (post isolation) recordings. He also mentions a video on youtube recently posted: Arson and Fraya Respond to Reviews.

**Greetings From Fire Island**: Ch1 - Ch2 - Ch3 - **The Show Must Go On**: Ch1 - Ch2 - Ch3 - Ch4
**Operation Watersport**: Ch1 - Ch2 - Ch3 - Ch4 - Ch5 - Ch6 - Ch7 - **Trials**: Ch1 - Ch2 - Ch3 - Ch4
**Ghosts of the Coast**: Ch1 - Ch2 - Ch3 - **The Devil's Due**: Ch1 - Ch2 - Ch3 - Ch4
**Special**: The Story So Far
**The Beautiful Place**: Ch1 - Ch2 - Ch3 - Ch4 - Ch5 - Ch6 - **A Dance in the Dark**: Ch1 - Ch2 - Ch3 - Ch4
**Drama in the Deep**: Ch1 - Ch2 - Ch3 - Ch4 - Ch5 - Ch6 - **Whispers From the Heart**: Ch1 - Ch2 - Ch3 - Ch4 - Ch5 - Ch6
**Danger Rangers!**: Ch1 - Ch2 - **Ch3** - Ch4 - Ch5 - Ch6
**Mist Connections**: Ch1 - Ch2
**Unreleased**
Lost: Camp Crystal Light - Pax West 2018 --  vs the Lizard People
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