Submarine Sandwich Investigation

The Submarine Sandwich Investigation—renamed to prevent any more legal trouble—was a series of inquiries into the purported theft of sub sandwiches. In the summer of 2018, Neophytos began diversifying its portfolio by acquiring a local restaurant—that restaurant being one location of a popular sub sandwich chain—in a less-than-legal gambling stint at an underground cock fighting ring which, at the time, was actually acting as a temporary site for Seth's Homeless Fight Club. This investigation ultimately bankrupted the organization, ushering in the contemporary era of Neophytos wherein flash-commerce initiatives and illicit activity has been necessary to recoup lost capital. To this day, Neophytos Enterprises, Inc struggles to remain a viable corporation, just barely breaking even between the varied sources of revenue its founders and employees work diligently to maintain. Accordingly, the cash reserves in Sam's Ass remain at an all-time low, yet to be replenished to their former glory.

## **Purpose & Execution**

Within the first week of operation, Mark, then manager of the location, was made aware that a newly-hired employee was giving away free sub sandwiches to customers. Inexperienced with management and uncertain of the legitimacy of these assertions, Mark consulted his peers at Neophytos. In response to this egregious loss of revenue, CFO Sam authorized and launched a full-scale investigation into the matter, diverting the grand sum of the organization's savings into the proceedings. A full five months was devoted to discovering the truth. The employee of interest quit before a final determination could be made.

## **Discoveries**

Ultimately, the Investigation yielded no useful information. Its main objective remains unmet to this day. All that could conclusively be surmised is that chain restaurants operate on thin margins and are difficult to maintain.

## **Outcome**

As a direct result of the Investigation, Neophytos Enterprises, Inc was made bankrupt. The sandwich store was kept in operation for an additional five months following the conclusion of the Investigation in the hopes that it might turn a profit, though it never did. In that time, CFO and newly-appointed Acting Manager Sam attempted to launch two more full-scale investigations, both of which shortly failed due to lack of funding. When it became apparent that the Neophytos Model of Operation did not lend itself to the restaurant business, and the property was foreclosed upon, Neophytos Enterprises, Inc shut down the shop and distanced itself from the ordeal to pursue more lucrative interests.

## **Subsequent Investigations**

The second full-scale investigation, made ineffective by a lack of resources, resulted in the attempted murder of an employee. Acting Manager Sam, in an effort to promote honesty and loyalty in his underlings, sought to purchase a gun. Funds were not available; as such, he resorted to using a pistol he discovered in the dumpster behind the store. Broken and unloaded, the weapon did not discharge when Sam attempted to use it on his cashier. This event had the opposite effect of that intended, and the employee quit on the spot. As an indirect result of the Submarine Sandwich Investigation, said employee survived and Sam remains out of prison.

The third full-scale investigation, also made ineffective by a lack of resources, involved a malfunctioning cash register. Unsatisfied by the ambiguity of the matter, Acting Manager Sam determined another series of inquiries was warranted. At the time of its inception, it was decided that this investigation was to last another five months if not longer, rivaling the significance and monetary demand of its predecessors. However, funds were not available; the proceedings concluded minutes later, after Sam acquiesced to the purchase of a replacement register. This register, along with the rest of the store and its furnishings, would be surrendered to the bank upon closing a mere week later.