Shrikejab

### Thoughts on Oc

I low-key love this guy. I adored his design and general personality, and now that I've fleshed him out more with regards to his past, I'm really happy with him.

Shrikejab is a sleek, slim, cream-colored tom with ginger tabby patches, golden eyes, and notably large ears.

## History

Shrikejab, born Sparrow, is the son of a loner shecat named Heron. Sparrow was born into a small yet close-knit family, including his mother and older brother from another litter that had decided to remain with her, Newt. Sparrow and Newt's father Stoat, having never been a fan of commitment, had left Heron for another shecat prior to Sparrow's birth, and the rest of her kits from Newt's litter had decided to leave individually to pursue their own lives. The shecat had been distressed by this, and her misgivings grew exponentially in light of Sparrow's litter--of the four kits she birthed, Sparrow was the only one who survived. This was largely due to Heron's swiftly declining health, which, as it worsened, made her more and more paranoid that this was a punishment for her being a single shecat raising kits, or a final blow from Stoat. As a result, she grew more distant as a mother, leaving Newt to largely provide and care for his younger brother.

Despite the lack of affection from Heron, for the most part, Sparrow was a happy kit. His older brother taught him how to hunt and fight, and showered him in all of the love that his mother did not. The two had grown to be thick as thieves, and Sparrow idolized his brother. This idolization, however, opened the door for the older tom to take advantage of Sparrow. Heron's illness quickly grew worse, and despite both toms' earnest attempts to heal her by means of food, water, rest, and Newt's limited knowledge of herbs, Heron passed away. After a time frame spent mourning for her, Newt decided that they would be best leaving their old home in search of other cats; after all, they couldn't spend the rest of their life grieving. Willing to follow his brother to the end of the earth, Sparrow agreed, and the two set off in search of a new home.

For a time, they simply wandered, rarely spending time in one place for longer than a few days. They encountered loners, though Newt often dismissed them as too old or strict or grouchy for them to stay with -- and other times, the other loners would simply shoo them away. Nevertheless, they had heard word from these loners that there were large clans of cats living in a nearby forest, though most of them simply warned that they should avoid these groups. Full of a resolve to find these "warriors", the two continued to trek through unfamiliar turf. Every night Newt would tell made up tales of these cats, infatuated with the very idea of a group of strong felines fighting and hunting together, and Sparrow imagined them right along with his brother.

When they finally reached the territory of one of the clans' territories, however, they were confronted by a patrol and promptly chased away, despite their pleas to join the group. This severely sullied the glorified imagery of clan cats that Newt had, and it soured the tom's mood. He no longer told stories to Sparrow, or spoke much of anything to him outside of the most minimal comments or remarks. However, this all changed when they met a tom named Privet.

Privet was the leader of a small group of rogues that called themselves the Reapers. He encountered the pair of brothers while out hunting with Bear, his second-in-command. His interest in the toms was piqued by Newt's aggression toward them while believing that they were clan cats. After assuring the toms that they were rogues, he invited them to join his group. Unsure exactly what they were getting into but assuming that they could just leave if they were no longer interested, the two brothers accepted.

The two quickly fit into the group, finding that it was much easier to live among other cats -- both with regards of social interaction as well as hunting becoming significantly easier. The rogues easily accepted the toms, and for a time everything seemed tranquil. This was disrupted for Sparrow, at least, as they became aware of the group's true nature.

A tom named Spider approached the group a week after the brothers had arrived. The tom stated that he had heard of the Reapers, and that he needed their help with something -- a job. Privet agreed to counsel with the tom and hear his case, and for a time he spoke with Spider in the privacy of his den, the two accompanied solely by Bear. When they later emerged, Privet called together the group, telling them that Spider had promised them a stretch of land in return for them killing a small group of loners that lived there. Immediately, Sparrow was alarmed. When he and his brothers had been welcomed into the group, there had been no indication that something like this would happen. Newt, however, seemed unperturbed, perhaps even morbidly intrigued by the proposition. He assured his younger brother that everything would be alright, and that this was simply a part of living in such a group. Since arriving there, Newt had grown to idolize Privet, nearly to the point of infatuation he had held for the clans, and the proposition of being able to impress the tom was exceedingly appealing to him. Thus, when they embarked a matter of days later with the rest of the group to launch an attack on the loners, Newt was determined that he would kill one of the loners himself in order to prove himself to the tom. Sparrow, however, was unsure.

When they arrived at the small camp of the loners, this uncertainty was amplified. Privet called for an ambush during the night, and the rogues attacked accordingly with little regard to who they were harming. While Sparrow had been trying to rationalize that these would be horrible, evil cats that they were eliminating for the greater good, this was dispelled as he came to realize that it was a *family*. The rogues attacked parents and kits alike, leaving Sparrow horrorstricken and petrified, unable to join in on the carnage. Newt, meanwhile, remained true to his intentions, aiding the other rogues in slaughtering the family. In virtually no time at all it was over, and the rogues left to return to their own camp, leaving behind the corpses. During the trek home, Newt boasted to his brother about his fighting skills and that he had managed to bring down a tom cat. Sparrow, aside from muted praise, contributed very little to the conversation, leading Newt to chastise him for not fighting. After all, Newt said, if they didn't contribute, they would be exiled from the group, and even beyond that, Sparrow was ruining the older tom's chances of being recognized by Privet. Sparrow halfheartedly agreed to participate during the next job, though he wasn't certain if he would truly go through with his promise.

As agreed by Spider, the group received the swath of land, and life once again settled into a more normal routine. Newt continued to put all of his efforts into his hunting and fighting skills, wanting nothing more than to impress the leader, and in the process, he largely neglected his brother. Sparrow had begun to hope that there would never be any other cat asking for the Reapers to do such a thing again, and for a time it seemed that he would receive his wish. However, it was swept away a moon later by Red, a tom bearing another task. He asked that the rogues eliminate a group of rogues that were encroaching upon his family's territory, and that in return, he would provide them with a reward of daily prey. The tom was desperate, and it was plain that he was not confident that he could take on the rogues on his own. Agreeing, Privet once again led his cats in an attack.

Privet initially questioned whether Sparrow was fit to join them in the fight, Newt assured him that his younger brother was more than capable of fighting; after all, weakness didn't run in the family. With that, Privet agreed to allow Sparrow to come along. Similarly to the prior attack, they moved under the cover of night. This time, however, they were targeting a smaller group consisting solely of adult males. Ambushing the toms, the rogues were met with a much more evenly matched group of foes. Sparrow was thrust into the battle, and though he didn't wish to harm anyone, one of the opposing toms aimed to target him. A burly cat, the tom cornered the thinner, more gangly Sparrow, plainly intent on killing. Sparrow was convinced that he was as good as dead, and by all means he should have been, if not for the other tom's lack of speed. Placed between a rock and a hard place, Sparrow did what he could never have seen himself doing only a moon or so ago: kill another cat. In a frantic attempt to defend himself, he slashed out at the tom, luck permitting him to land a strike across his throat. Before he could make another step forward, the burly cat collapsed, bleeding out onto the ground, leaving a petrified Sparrow in his wake. The rest of the battle raged on in a muted fashion in Sparrow's eyes; all he could see was the tom's bloodied pelt, and all he could hear was his own heartbeat thundering. He attempted to place pressure on the tom's wound as he had learned from the other rogues -- albeit in a lesson on what to do if one of their own was injured -- but none of his attempts proved to work. Within moments the tom had slipped away, leaving an empty, bleeding husk, and Sparrow standing over it.

He stood over the tom's body for what felt like an eternity, frantically poring through his own thoughts. He likely would've remained much longer if not for the voice of his brother drawing him from his mind. Newt was certainly alarmed that Sparrow had managed to down such a tom, but he was simultaneously proud, saying that he had done the right thing, and that Privet was sure to see both of them now. Sparrow wasn't sure he agreed that it was righteous, and he didn't know that he wanted Privet to be proud of him for this. Still, he followed his brother to their new home, virtually shaking.

Despite his best hopes, however, Privet did indeed notice him. The day following the fight, the tom called for a meeting to acknowledge their two newest members' efforts. He spoke of their bravery and commitment for the group. Asking Sparrow to come forward, the leader said that such a name was hardly proper for a tom so powerful yet deceiving. He re-dubbed the tom "Shrike" after the bird, stating that if the younger tom was to be a bird, he deserved to be a powerful one. He then focused his attention on Newt, praising him for his hard work and joking that his name was already horrible enough. Sparrow -- or rather, Shrike -- could hardly fathom this. He had killed, and he didn't think that deserved any type of reward. A pit had formed in his stomach, one that he wasn't sure anything would be able to fill.

Shrike remained with the group, participating in more of their "jobs" with great reluctance, and becoming more and more horrified with himself as he killed more and more cats. He began to have nightmares of them cursing him for what he had done for them. Newt had become so obsessed with Privet and proving himself to be worthy of the tom that he hardly noticed his brother's deteriorating state, and in a way, Newt had been successful. Privet had grown to respect the two brothers for their work and proficiency.

However, all of Shrike's discomfort culminated in his final job -- targeting another family. It progressed as many of their ambushes did: they attacked during the night, quickly eliminating all of their targets. This time, though, Shrike was instructed to kill one of the kits. A *kit*. The very thought was sickening, and when the time came that they were in the height of the slaughter, he couldn't bring himself to do it. Newt, seeing his brother's weakness, abandoned his own kill and struck down the target that Shrike had been told to take out. He yelled at his brother for his lapse, for his weakness and that he was a disgrace, but Shrike couldn't bring himself to defend himself or even listen. All he could do was gaze at the limp kit, waves of grief and shame rushing over himself for what he had allowed himself to become. Unable to face himself, he ran away. He raced away from the rogues and their continued killing, away from Privet and his brother and his new "home". Though Newt intended to go after his brother, to bring him back, the leader assured him that if Shrike couldn't handle it they didn't need his weakness, and that if he could, he would return. Hesitantly, Newt agreed, and the rogues returned to their camp.

Shrike continued to run deeper and deeper into the forest, further and further from his guilt and the Reapers. He couldn't bare the thoughts of what he had done. Eventually, he stopped and settled beneath a bush for the night, establishing that as his new home. His nightmares continued, growing worse and worse, with the image of the kit remaining virtually burned in his mind. However, these living conditions did not last for long, and soon he heard word of new clans, separate from the one that had denied his brother and himself a home so many moons ago. Determined to leave behind his past and establish a new life for himself where he could give back to the world, he set off in search of this clan.

He eventually encountered a shecat named Ravenshade, who had been out on a patrol with some of her warriors, and was leading her own group. She invited him into her group, and he hastily agreed, praying that it would not be like the rogues he had lived with for so long. He was relieved to find that Ravenshade was a kind leader, and that the cats in her group were not mercenaries willing to kill kits. He quickly fits in with the cats, though he is reserved and does not like to speak at all of his past. Eventually, he is given the warrior name Shrikejab, and though he experiences some discomfort in retaining the name "Shrike", he does not wish to tell Ravenshade out of a fear that she would not accept him into her group should the rest of his past become clear. He slowly grows out of this discomfort with his name, assuring himself that he was not the tom that Privet believed him to be.

As he grows more accustomed to life among Ravenshade's cats, he meets a shecat named Lambkit, and he takes a friendly liking to her. He relates to her in that she is suddenly plunged into a new home with new customs, and to a certain extent, he views her as a younger sister of sorts. It is through his interactions with the shecat that he is able to, to a certain extent, cope with his past, though nightmares still follow him. He is later assigned as Lambkit, now Lambpaw's mentor, and he resolves to provide her with a strong moral figure, just as he lacked in his own childhood. He is proud of the shecat's progress in hunting and fighting, and he is certain that she will become skilled warrior.

Ravenshade later takes on the name Ravenstar, and her group is granted the name "RavenClan". Through this transition, Shrikejab remains exceedingly loyal to the leader and the clan itself. He finds cruel irony in that he is only able to become a clan cat now, after all he has gone through. He has since grown closer with the leader, considering her a friend, and has also befriended some of his other new clanmates.