Cory J. Beck

* Default
* Armenian Cory (2022)
* Original Cory (2022)

### Friends

* FRIENDS!? HA HA HA HA-- oh wait, you're serious? Dude, it's Cory we're talking about.
* (him and Chris are best friends)

### Status

* In search of Tarantino's terabytes of feet porn
* Full of cum
* Cum inflated
* In possession of the 4th Tomar emerald

" You can't excape, I will rape you. "
 — Cory, in yet another one of his crazy ramblings.

***Cory James Beck*** (also known by the based pseudonym **Spazkid**) is a Newgrounds animator and a shambling, horny, autism-riddled wreck.

## History

Cory was supposedly born in 199X (Though he claims to be born in the year 3000) to two hard working Americans in the St. Louis labor camps and later grew up in Missouri. Because of his parents aversion to Missouri's contaminated tap water, Cory was spared from mutating into a Water Person, and got to live, for the most part, a normal everyday life, making such accomplishments such as breaking and entering because of Truth and Dare, wasting all of the emergency power laughing at Dragon Ball Z, throwing his sister off of a flight of stairs, playing the trombone in a jazz band, etc.

In the late 2000's, Cory gained internet fame with his animated series based on the award winning graphic novel series *Sonichu* by Christine Weston Chandler. The series ended after two seasons due to Cory beginning to form pity for Chris-Chan, as his life has grown to be sad.

He soon joined N.A.S.A's mars colonization program and returned speaking 'Crazy Frog language' and claimed to see a 'Marsquatch' while he was playing Sonic Adventure 2 Battle for Gamecube. Later analysis showed that he suffered a diabetic coma while on Mars.

Cory has proven his artistic prowess and perfectionist nature time and again in Slightly Artistic, by usually being the first to finish a sketch, and that sketch usually being the most seriously done of the group. His favorite thing to draw is big boobie'd girls, but men will do in a pinch.

### The Siege of Kickassia, Death and Revival

On February 2020, Cory and his friend Chris O'Neill argued to themselves about the Nostalgia Critic's The Wall Review. Cory was sick of hearing about how bad it was, and suggested that they watch the Nostalgia Critic and Nostalgia Chick's review of Ferngully instead. Their anger subsided as they watched the review, but tension started up again as Tomar, seemingly coming from out of nowhere, started to gaze upon the Nostalgia Chick's beauty. In a state of both primal rage and extreme jealousy, Cory punched through Chris' TV screen and screamed *"If I can't have her, nobody can!"*

Pulling out the remote from Adam Sandler's Click, Cory started a Nostalgia Critic marathon which teleported the trio to the real Kickassia, where Doug Walker rules supreme. Accompanied by the great Linkara, the three of them travelled the plains of Kickassia until they reached the gates, where they found Doug filiming a new review. Cory attacks him with a silver spear and labels his Wall review as "subpar". The Nostalgia Critic proceeded to shoot Cory in the head with his pistol multiple times until he was dead.

While it seemed like Cory was gone for good, he managed to return for the next A.I. Dungon episode. How exactly he was revived is unknown, however, it is possible his Autismo Aura managed to protect him from Doug's gunshots. Another theory is that his brain was simply small enough to dodge the bullets. When questioned on this subject, Cory is known to zone out and start mumbling about beetles.

### Resurgence and Alleged Second Death

On Friday, April 15th of 2022, Chris made a post on Twitter stating that Cory wasn’t reacting well to the air in L.A. but was ready to play some games. Accompanying the post was an image of Cory in a car looking like a dishevelled caveman. Saturday, April 16th of 2022 would mark the return of Cory to OneyPlays, as he would go to reappear in Civilization VI, Sonic Heroes and Sonic Advance playthroughs, as well as revivals of the A.I. Dungeon and Super Mario World playthroughs.

On Monday, May 9th of 2022, Cory was shot and killed by Jay and Silent Bob after he allegedly threatened the silly stoner duo with a katana. However, Cory disputes these claims.

## Coryisms

Cory's manner of speech is one to be studied, as most of the time it seems unintentional, or his ideas come off as verbal diarrhea. As described by Chris, Cory's brain is "full of tar" and was "dipped in Fanta Orange for too long".

He usually mispronounces words, makes up new ones in its place or simply gets information wrong. These moments have been termed as "Coryisms" or "Cory Porn". Here are a few of his best moments/quotes:

* "The Wingle Dance"
* Talks about the "infamous" Bowling Pin gif saying it reminds him of "Jimmy Neutron Cum Water Bubbles" as in the 3D style of animation
* ”I'd suck my utters”
* Referring to Big Ben as the "Ben Drowned Tower" and the "Uncle Ben Tower", as well as referring to the Golden Gate Bridge as "The Golden Twin Towers"
* Confusing himself on what Jimmy Neutron's name is on 2 separate occasions; referring to him as Isaac Newton, Isaac Humphrey, and Jimmy Amadeus Helperman.
* "Mother-bearing hips," said so much that he's been blamed for causing his friends to say it as well
* Thinks Frodo from Lord of the Rings and Frollo from Hunchback of Notre Dame are the same character
* "Return my wig, or suffer the slab!"
* "Every time you see Naruto running, Sonic is running the exact same way. Let that fucking sink in. When Sonic's running like that, fucking, Thomas the Train Engine is running the exact same way. Let *that* fucking sink in."
* "Liar liar, plants for hire, had a wife, couldn’t deny her."
* "Clethargic"
* "Excape"
* "Now and days"
* "Don't have a bitch, cow"
* "Implimencations"
* "You can't fuck what you can't see"
* "What did the chicken say to the road?"
* Referring to serial killers Jeffry Dahmer as "Two left shoes", as well as referring to John Wane Gacy as "Todd Wane Gacy", "Dwayne 'The Rock' Gacy", and "The clown who molests little boys"
* Referring to YouTube CEO Susan Wojcicki as "Susan Boyle".
* "Stupid is as stupid does, mamma always said life is like a box of dick".
* In a hypothetical about Markiplier asking Jeff to be his stunt double in a movie, Cory says that Markiplier wants Jeff to be his "stunt devil" because they "share the same chin."
* In SleepyCast S2:E10 when discussing Star Wars, Cory refers to Han Solo as "Hans Zimmer" and Wookies as "Chewbaccians."
* While on the topic of pregnancy, Cory referred to a baby being inside its mother "in a pregnantly way, not in a sexual way."
* An inversion happens when he correctly uses the term "fraternal twin" and the other guys have no idea what he's saying
* "ROFL-Barbecue"
* ”Did you know this is what dogs see? Well not this, this is more what people see.”
* "My brain wrapped around itself and came 360 around!"
* ”1996? That actually happened.”
* Refers to FNAF villain William Afton as "William Ashton"

## Appearances

* A.I. Dungeon
* Catlevania: Rondo of Blood
* Civilization VI
* Dragon Ball Z Budokai 2
* Dragon's Dogma: Dark Arisen
* Five Nights at Freddy's
* Fortnite
* Indivisible
* Left 4 Dead 2 (Debut)
* The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask
* The Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker
* Resident Evil 2 (2014)
* Resident Evil 2 Remake
* Resident Evil 3: Nemesis
* Revolution 60
* Roblox
* Super Mario World (2022)
* Shantae and the Pirate's Curse
* Scary Tales Vol. 1
* Skinwalker Hunt
* SleepyCast
* Slightly Artistic
* Spooky's Jump Scare Mansion
* Sonic Heroes
* Sonic Advance
* Sonic the Hedgehog 2
* Sonic 3 & Knuckles
* Sonic Adventure 2
* Titanfall 2
* The Baby In Yellow
* Vampire Survivors

## Quotes

* "I don't know. It came to my head, it made laugh, so I said it."
* "Is this a case of beer or do you want to fuck me?"
* "If I was a parent, I'd fuck my children."
* "My brain works faster than my mind thinks."
* "You can't fuck what you can't see."
* "Wait why!?"
* "Oh biscuits and breadsticks!"
* "I'm a sociopath who likes watching the downfall of things."
* "That's the ticket, you know where to stick it."
* "I wish I WAAAaAAaAaAaAAaaAaAaAaAs!!!"
* "Armenian Cory, cause I \*CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED\*”
* "I have the reaction time of an old person with arthritis."
* "I fucking harbor on the concept of autism."

## Trivia

* Cory is known to have the *Autismo Aura*, where anyone spending too much time around him drops their IQ by varying percents.
* Likes anthropomorphic foxes with dicks and tits.
* He would fuck the Green M&M without any hesitation.
* Doesn't like eating food.
* The Jawless Man is Cory's only known nemesis.
* Cory beat The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time without using the fire tunic or water tunic (because he didn't know they existed).
* On an episode of Sleepy Cabin, Cory did a twenty-minute-plus bit talking about what meals he would make with passion fruit, only for him to declare he didn't know it was real and thought it was made up. What a guy.
* When he was younger, Cory tried sticking stuff in his ass to test if he was gay. He didn't like it. He used the rod that hold CDs as the thing he stuck up his ass, and used a garbage bag as a condom.
* Cory's step-father believes that we are all Aliens and has spent a substantial amount of money to prove it
* The rest of the crew has all agreed that Cory is the most skilled in animation, making him a "idiot savant" of sorts
* Cory fears prostate exams, not because they will violate his anus, but because he is afraid that they might find his G-spot and he'll have a boner during the exam.
* Cory looks cute when he does the ahegao face (per testimony of Chris).
* Cory revealed that his iconic "J" stands for James in *Civilization VI* after Chris asked. Chris went on to say his middle name is James non-sarcastically (despite other wikis saying Chris' middle name is Luke).[1]
* He doesn't know who Winston Churchill was. Churchill will never surrender to this and will most likely continue attempting to inform Cory.
* He doesn't know what the industrial revolution was (nor the consequences).
* Cory's dad is fuckin' nuts.
* Chris *ALLEGEDLY* used a photoshop app to make a deepfake of Cory during his visit at Burbank in 2022. In the picture, Cory is depicted, as he himself says, "a caveman R-word". That picture remains to be Spazkidin3d/Cory's last RL public photo to date.
* Cory was once the star of his own short-lived isekai anime spin-off series. For more information, see *House of Beck*.
* The longest Cory has gone without bitching about a small insignificant detail in something is a solid two seconds.
* Despite working on nightmare cops for years Cory's nitpicks on games prove he has no knowledge of game design
* Cory has a coprophagia fetish, in addition to scat art he drew. Here's the following evidence:
	+ He calls shit stains 'yellow mustard' with his reasoning being 'You put mustard on your sandwich'.
	+ He's made it clear he has no problem with shit fetishists.
	+ When seeing that Gollum ate normal food (Which even crazy people know is what you're supposed to do) he immediately questioned why he didn't eat his own feces.
* The longest series to feature Cory is The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker, clocking in at 10 hours and 52 minutes.