Episode 3: The Little Death

## Synopsis

Antigone's weekly cinema trip is ruined by Rudyard's latest attempt to spite Eric Chapman.

## Characters

* Rudyard Funn
* Antigone Funn
* Eric Chapman
* Georgie Crusoe
* Madeleine
* Rev. Nigel Wavering
* Herbert Cough
* Hettie Mayo
* Miss Scruple
* Jerry
* Tanya
* Bill

## Plot

Following a long day spent reassembling the body of Mr. Allerton, who had an accident with a ceiling fan, Antigone visits the Piffling Royale Cinema to watch a movie: she is the sole member of its Thursday Night French New Wave Club. The proprietor, Herbert Cough, mentions that she looks different - this is because she is not wearing her outdoor survival suit (And is also wearing new nail polish). While watching the movie, Antigone suspects she is hallucinating when she hears the on-screen couple addressing one another as “Eric” and “Antigone” during a sex scene. Despite her alleged disgust, she watches the remaining half hour before complaining to Herbert about it. He offers to screen another movie the next day to make up for it. Antigone is hesitant at first, as she only goes out on Thursdays, but eventually agrees.

The next day, Rudyard scolds Georgie for arriving 15 minutes late after taking a detour to buy a latte. He asks Antigone where she was the night before. She explains that she has gone to the cinema every Thursday night for seventeen years, but Rudyard forgets every time she tells him. Rudyard theorizes that Georgie’s lateness is a sign of rebellion. Eric Chapman visits Funn Funerals to speak with Georgie. He asks her out to the newly re-opened cliffside café where just got her coffee. Rudyard tries to dissuade her, saying he needs her help at a funeral that evening, but Antigone angrily tells Rudyard to let Georgie go. Rudyard insists that Chapman is trying to poison Georgie against the Funns and recruit her. He plans to spy on Eric and Georgie that evening and asks Antigone to handle the funeral, but she refuses, saying she will be going to a movie.

At the funeral, Reverend Wavering mentions how Mr. Allerton was caught in his ceiling fan when jumping up in excitement after winning 20 pounds on the EuroMillions. Rudyard impatiently waits for the service to conclude while listening in on Georgie and Eric’s conversation through a radio. Wavering remarks that Antigone’s work on reconstructing his head was excellent, but Mr. Allerton doesn’t quite look himself - it’s implied he looks somewhat like Eric Chapman.  Rudyard runs to the café as Reverend Wavering begins an auction for Allerton’s twenty pounds, and Antigone locks up at Funn Funerals before heading to the cinema. She encounters Miss Scruple, who rambles on about how she often contemplates what a shame it would be if Antigone ended up spending her whole life in the mortuary, growing old and miserable all alone with no love or company. Antigone leaves, unsettled.

Meanwhile, at the Sharp Drop Café, Georgie and Eric converse: she complains of his habit of staring off into nothing and saying “a long time ago…” every time he mentions his life prior to moving to Piffling. Rudyard spies on them with a two-way radio attached to Madeleine. He argues with the proprietor of the café, Harriet, now calling herself “Hettie Mayo” and pretending to be Australian. When Eric accidentally drops a bowl of sugar, he and Georgie notice Madeleine spying on them. The other patrons see her, panic about a cyborg mouse infestation, and flee, prompting Harriet/Hettie to attack Rudyard with a didgeridoo as Georgie and Eric leave.

Antigone arrives at the theatre, unhappy to hear that she won’t be alone in the screening. The other guests turn out to be Georgie, Eric, Rudyard, and Madeleine. Antigone shushes Eric and Georgie for talking during the film, and Rudyard confronts her for thwarting his attempts to listen in. They argue, prompting Eric to shush them. Eric and Georgie talk in one row of the theatre while Antigone and Rudyard argue in another. Antigone is mortified to hear over Madeleine’s radio that Eric is trying to hold Georgie’s hand, a gesture met with apathy. Eventually Eric stands up to tell the others to be quiet and realizes that it’s the Funns. Georgie reveals to him that Rudyard has been using Madeleine to spy on them, and is offended when Rudyard accuses Eric of trying to entice a “poor, impressionable young girl”. The subsequent argument between Antigone, Georgie, and Eric is interrupted by a loud explosion from the film. Rudyard, who had stopped talking and started watching the movie after Antigone told him to butt out of the conversation, tells them that two unicycles collided. Georgie and Eric decide to leave, and he offers to walk her home, but she tells him the date is over. Rudyard tells Antigone that it would be good if Chapman and Georgie were dating, since he could gain inside information from her. Antigone gets Rudyard kicked out of the theatre by telling Herbert Cough that he is using a robotic mouse to pirate the movie.

 Finally alone in the theatre, Antigone tries to enjoy it the movie, but now finds that the characters in the sex scene are called Eric and Georgie. In the ending voice-over, Madeleine says that Antigone reverted to her Thursday night schedule afterwards, but always wore headphones and never read the subtitles, and it was never really as much fun that way.