Detective jakkid166 Breaks Bad

**Detective jakkid166 Breaks Bad** is a story in jakkid166's My Little Pony Series. Taking place before The Fall of Detective jakkid166, the story is a parody of popular TV show Breaking Bad, following jakkid as he decides to start manufacturing meth in the wake of being diagnosed with a "terminal cold".

## Summary

One average day, Detective jakkid166 is recruited by the local schoolteacher, Cheerilee, to teach the students about the human world and the intricacies of being a detective. Mid-lesson, however, jakkid is overcome by a coughing fit and coughs up a white ball. Concerned, he visits the local doctor, only to find out that it is a tumor. Jakkid is informed by Dr. Jackass (whom jakkid notes is a donkey and that the name is thus fine) that he has a "terminal cold" and will be dead in around a week. Jakkid, worried about how his friends will be provided for (despite them having jobs of their own and no known financial problems), visits Twilight for advice. Twilight suggests they cook meth to gather money quickly, and after surprisingly little encouragement, jakkid agrees, and this act instantly causes his hair to fall out and for him to grow a mustache and goatee, in resemblance to Walter White from the show this story brings inspiration from. The exact same thing then happens to Twilight.

After cooking a fresh batch of meth, Twilight and jakkid start selling it door to door to random ponies. Their first customer ends up being none other than Cheerilee, who initially accepts, but upon letting them into her house she pulls a gun on them and accuses them of being cops due to Detective jakkid166's name starting with "Detective". Jakkid manages to convince Cheerilee to let them show her how to make their meth, but in the process of doing so, jakkid grabs some "Exploding Poison Gas Powder", which he throws in the pan, causing it to explode and distract Cheerilee while the two run outside and shut the front door. Cheerilee tries to shoot jakkid through the door, but he manages to keep it shut, and Cheerilee dies from the gas. After having a brief moral crisis, jakkid and Twilight resolve to try to get rid of the body. Meanwhile, Dick America hears word of meth being distributed in Ponyville from Cheerilee's blog, and he teams up with Applejack to find the culprit.

Jakkid and Twilight resolve to dissolve the body in acid, and jakkid managed to procure some from the local Acid Mart. Meanwhile, Dick America and Applejack are investigating the local dirt store, due to dirt being an essential ingredient in meth. After telling a long-winded story of a former lover of his, Dick America manages to get information from the cashier that meth-making dirt was recently purchased by "some dude with glasses". Later on, jakkid and Twilight have successfully dissolved the body, and are rolling the barrel around town trying to find a way to dispose of it. Dick America and Applejack show up and almost catch them in the act, but they manage to lie their way out of it and the two leave. Twilight and jakkid dump the barrel into a nearby fountain, and due to the close call, resolve to find a lawyer.

The two head to a local lawyer's castle, as lawyers tend to have, and talk to the receptionist. After successfully convincing her that they were on the list by erasing their names from said list and then writing them back on again, they are dropped into the "lawyer lair" where they meet with just the man jakkid was looking for - Phoenix Wright. Phoenix is initially appalled at jakkid's turn to meth manufacturing, but jakkid manages to use his "Detective Logic" to convince Phoenix to help them. Phoenix sets up a meeting with a potential distributor for their product at a local restaurant, "Las Metanfetamina Hermanas". Despite their initial confusion at how such a restaurant could possibly be affiliated with drugs, they are met by Zecora, who initially refuses to work with them, but the two manage to convince her to give them a chance after noting that their meth is pure and "100% grass-fed". She leads them into the back room where they meet up with her associates, Cranky Doodle Donkey and Mario Soprano, and explains that Mario must taste-test the meth to ensure its quality. However, after jakkid reveals the meth, Mario laughs and reveals that the three had planned this as a trick to kill jakkid and Twilight for learning of Zecora's secret life (despite Zecora being the one who purposely revealed it to them) and also to steal their meth. Jakkid, however, suddenly reveals that the "meth" they'd brought was in fact *not* meth at all, and promptly throws a piece at Mario, which does nothing, to his dismay. Deciding to try it anyway, Mario pops the piece into his mouth and crunches down on it... and it promptly explodes, devastating the room and discombobulating everyone present, yet somehow not killing Mario. His face now blackened with soot and "explosion", he heads off to the hospital. Zecora misinterprets this whole situation as the duo's meth being so pure that it blew up Mario's face, and decides to hire them. Twilight asks jakkid what the substance was, and jakkid replies that it was Tylenol.

## Characters

Being a parody of Breaking Bad, the fanfiction loosely follows the plot of the original show, and various characters in the story somewhat mirror the roles of those from the show. This includes:

* Detective jakkid166 - Walter White
* Twilight Sparkle - Jesse Pinkman
* Dick America - Hank Schrader
* Applejack - Steve Gomez
* Cheerilee - A combination of Emilio Koyama and Krazy-8
* Phoenix Wright - Saul Goodman
* Zecora - Gustavo Fring
* Cranky Doodle Donkey - Mike Ehrmantraut