S01E08 - Squirts So Good

## Squirts So Good

Following a request from Lindsay, @sierrabancroft crafted a picture of Snape and Hermione riding Falkor from the Neverending Story.

## Previous and Next

### Next

S01E09 - May the Best Man Win

This episode is the third one featuring future co-host Danny Chapman.

Improper Use of Magic: Glans is the correct anatomical term for a part of the penis.

This chapter is entitled "Completion".

## Episode Summary

Juices, juices, everywhere. Also, Hermione might want to seek medical attention. Snape sends Hermione flying through the clouds (because he f\*\*\*s her, not on Falkor).

## Notable Moments

* Danny is Allie's house-elf (she's keeping him locked in her basement)
* Danny pronouncing "wantonly" as if it is a chinese soup (wanTONly)
* Homework for listeners: Squirters get in touch and let them know your stories!
* Revealed that 45 minutes of Allie laughing had to be edited out of Allie laughing at 45 minutes of kissing.
* Drinking game proposed by Lyndsay (they are drinking champagne): The Golden Threesome drink every time something sexual happens that they weren't previously aware of existing OR is "gulch-inducing".
	+ First drink occurs **10 seconds** after the story starts.
	+ Words that triggered a drink: moist, pelvis.
	+ Multiple mental images triggered drinking
* Allie prediction: Snape will proclaim, "I've completed" upon ejaculation.
* A new question arises about the Prefect's bathroom...are there toilets in it?
* Allie's love of spiiiiiiigots makes another appearance.
* "Snape: The Half-Chub Prince" ~ Danny
* Slytheredin pun drop.
* Snape exerted so much energy on kissing that immediately after entering, he needed to take a rest.
* Ollivander's condom fitting...potential new career path if the wand thing gets boring?
* Hermione would be a very unbelievable adult entertainment star, sounds too humdrum.
* This sex scene resembles a country song.
* Juices EVERYWHERE. No wonder there is so many towels in this bathroom.
* More Allie 90's references, this time 90's country music star Garth Brooks.
* Neverending Story reference triggered by Allie's mental image of a Pegasus prancing through the woods. Lyndsay puts out a request for someone to photoshop Snape and Hermione onto Falkor's back and @sierrabancroft delivers (see podcast picture above).
* Danny's proposed lube spell: *Juicius Limitless.* Lyndsay's: *Lubos.*
* The Golden Threesome conjecture that "Hermione" is really someone else in Polyjuice Potion skin...perhaps Tonks?
* Vajazzled reference
* Allie is very concerned about Hermione's creamy white output. She should probably seek medical treatment. She may have a yeast infection.
* Snape's ejaculate is being called "rich butter'.
* Do Hogwart's professors only have sex based on their specialty? (Sprout does it in the woods, McGonagall does it in cat form, etc.)
* Hermione is a STAGE FIVE CLINGER! Snape shouldn't have licked the underboob. ~ Danny
* Problematic description of Hermione in this fic in that she's basically controlled and manipulated by Snape through the entire story.
* Listener Challenges: What showtunes does Hermione's vagina sing-asm, and what haiku does Snape's penis ejaculate.
* Possible Epilogue: Baby Snapeger? Lyndsay's verdict: "gag".