... had an identity crisis

**... had an identity crisis** is the seventh episode in Season 4 of the Netflix series, *Never Have I Ever*. It is also the thirty-seventh episode overall.

## Synopsis

*As Paxton struggles to let go of his past as the king of high school, he seizes a chance to thrive as a swim coach and finds closure with an old flame.*

## Plot

Gigi Hadid discusses how Paxton is reliving his high school experience but as a teacher now. He enjoys his popularity and is invited to all the parties. During a teacher's meeting, Lindsay Thompson asks for volunteers for a potluck, but only Professor Shapiro shows interest. Paxton avoids participating by claiming he is busy on the day of the event. The coach then asks Paxton to oversee the Swim Team tryouts, where Eric from the Robotics team attempts to make the team for the fourth consecutive year, despite not having any swimming skills. Paxton observes Eric's persistent attempts throughout his high school years despite his lack of swimming ability.

Eric feels disappointed after not being selected for the team again, but Paxton explains that he needs intensive training to improve his chances. However, Eric misunderstands this as an invitation for Paxton to personally train him and desperately pleads for his help.

Devi, while listing her daily accomplishments, hopes to find her own path to Princeton, much like how Paxton managed to return to high school. Paxton is taken aback by her comment but gets distracted when Trent asks to hang out with him that evening. Paxton agrees to host a small gathering for the swim club members at his house, but his attention is diverted when Eric approaches him for a coaching session.

Paxton offers Eric some guidance to enhance his swimming skills and is amazed by Eric's relentless determination. The small gathering quickly escalates into a chaotic party, leaving Paxton overwhelmed. Paxton continues to receive reminder emails from his college, ASU.

Devi unexpectedly shows up at the party and notices that Paxton isn't enjoying himself. Concerned, she reassures him that throwing a party with teenagers is harmless since nobody would report him. Just then, Lindsay arrives at the party after receiving a distress call from a student.

Lindsay is shocked to discover that Paxton was the one throwing the party with alcohol for high schoolers. The following week, Paxton attempts to have a conversation with Lindsay at the school. She reminds him that he is now an adult and needs to behave responsibly as a grown-up and a teacher.

Paxton arrives at his training session with Eric, contemplating his life choices. He unleashes his pent-up frustration on Eric, questioning why he persists despite repeated failures. Eric shares that he is fine with failing because, at least, he is making an effort. He believes there's a chance for eventual victory, which would bring him pride.

Eric expresses his determination not to give up on his dream without even trying. Paxton promises to train him and intensifies his coaching, pushing Eric to train harder in swimming. Meanwhile, Devi intends to inform Paxton about the broken lock in the storage room but forgets to do so. After their final session together, Paxton feels hopeful about Eric's chances of making it onto the swim team.

While helping Devi organize the swim supplies, Paxton and Devi accidentally get locked inside the storage room together without their phones. As they wait for someone to rescue them, they start talking. Paxton advises Devi to ease up on her desperation to get into Princeton.

Curious about Paxton's departure from ASU, Devi asks him about it. Paxton explains that he felt belittled at the university and regrets not being in college. Devi playfully mentions her "sexually successful senior" status, joking about Paxton's experience in high school. Paxton is surprised to learn about Devi's sexual activity with Ben and Ethan. They share a lighthearted moment and Devi reveals that she thought she would lose her virginity to Paxton. She admits feeling equal to him for the first time, but Paxton believes she deserves better.

Caught in the moment, Paxton and Devi kiss but quickly pull apart when Coach Noble opens the storage room door. Coach Noble warns Paxton to be cautious about his actions as a teacher. Later that night, Paxton confides in his mother about feeling like a failure. She advises him to let go of his past self and discover his true identity.

The next day, everyone celebrates Eric's successful tryout for the swim team. Eric credits his achievement to Paxton, and their perseverance earns cheers from everyone. Devi discusses the kiss with Paxton and considers it closure for their past. Ben joins their conversation, attempting to mock Devi, but she retaliates. Paxton suggests that Devi and Ben may have shared some connection, but Devi shuts him down.

On that same day, Paxton attends the teacher's potluck and volunteers for the student help hotline. Paxton is warmly received by his colleagues.

## Cast

### Starring

* Maitreyi Ramakrishnan as Devi Vishwakumar
* Poorna Jagannathan as Nalini Vishwakumar
* Richa Shukla as Kamala Nandiwadal
* Jaren Lewison as Ben Gross
* Darren Barnet as Paxton Hall-Yoshida
* Ramona Young as Eleanor Wong
* Lee Rodriguez as Fabiola Torres
* John McEnroe as The Narrator

### Guest-Starring

* Ranjita Chakravarty as Nirmala
* Ivan Hernandez as Andres Ramos
* Jeff Garlin as Len
* Alexandra Billings as Jennifer Warner
* Benjamin Norris as Trent Harrison
* Michael Cimino as Ethan Morales
* Victoria Moroles as Margot Ramos
* Genneya Walton as Ms. Thompson