Incorrect Quotes

## BunnyHat-07/13/2016

Created by AnX

* Courier: What is this feeling, so sudden and new?
* Agent: I felt the moment I laid eyes on you.
* Courier: My pulse is rushing.
* Agent: My head is reeling.
* Courier: My face is flushing.
* Both: What is this feeling, fervid as a flame? Does it have a name?
* Agent: Yes! Loathing!

Created by Niv

* (Texting)
* Respi: You will machete through this!
* Respi: \*make it
* Respi: Fuck please don’t machete your way through this.
* Plague Doctor: Too late.

Created by Niv

* [Natalia has just entered the TARDIS for the first time]
* Courier: Nice to meet you.
* Blue: Do you mind flirting outside?
* Courier [defensive]: I was just saying hello.
* Blue: For you, that’s flirting.

Created by AnX

* Venus: Is there a word that's a mix between angry and sad?
* Courier: Malcontented, disgruntled, miserable, desolated...
* Ace: Smad.

Natalia: There are two kinds of people.
Created by Niv

* Agent: Hey. This is not the time to blame Courier.
* Courier: Thank you. Finally.
* Agent: There will be plenty of time to blame Courier later, when this is resolved.

Created by AnX

* Courier: I trust Ace.
* Natalia: You think he knows what he's doing?
* Courier: I'm not sure I'd go that far.

Created by Niv
Courier: Well, Agent, what are friends for?
Agent: Friends? If pressed, I would say that you and I coexist.
Created by Niv
Agent: I don't want to sound racist-
Courier: But you're gonna power through it.
Created by Niv
"He’s like the perfect storm of amazing hair and terrible judgement."
— Courier (talking about Ace)
Created by Niv
Respi: So you threw a sword at me last night.
Agent: I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.

Created by AnX
Time-Hunter: I screwed up big time.
Ace: Mate, given your daily life experiences, you're gonna have to be more specific

Created by Mete
Courier: -texting with Natalia- I will be back later.
Natalia: Goodnight homo.
Natalie: \*homie
Natalia: Eh, same thing.

Created by Niv
Respi: Pardon the intrusion!
Agent: On this moment or my life in general?

Created by Niv
Natalia: Just... you know, just to clarify, you decided to re-create a clearly dangerous, potentially deadly experiment?
Plague Doctor: Oh, sure, it sounds bad when you say it like that.

Created by AnX
Courier: Rakes. My old arch enemy.
Agent: I thought I was your arch enemy.
Courier: I have a life outside of you, Agent!

Created by Niv
"Ok. I am going to picture Respi without her personality. Woah, Respi might be hot."
— Agent

Created by AnX
Jack: We have weapons. We have soldiers.
Courier: You know what I have? A 17-year-old genius with explosives and a problem with authority.

Created by Niv
[due to the fallout from the whole 'E-Com was fooled' thing, Natalia has stepped up to become its new leader]
Natalia: I'm starting to think that this was a bad idea... I'm a failure.
Courier: Nope!
Natalia: Nope?
Courier: Nope! You're a leader now, Nat. You're not allowed to be a failure.
Natalia: But.. .what if I'm a failure at being a leader?
Courier: Nope!
Natalia: You know, you're not the easiest person to talk to about this kind of stuff.
Courier: Nope!

Created by AnX
The Police: So you lied to me.
Time-Hunter: Hey, where I'm from, we believe all sorts of things that aren't true. We call it history.

Created by Niv
Courier: Guess what’s in this box!
Vela: Donuts?
Courier: No.
Vela: Muffins?
Courier: No.
Vela: Corn dogs?
Courier: No.
Vela: Chocolate?
Courier: No. It’s not food.
Vela: Then who cares?

Created by AnX
Malakh: Where is the map, you pathetic cretin?!
Ace: Okay, first of all it's "creetin." If you're gonna threaten me, do it properly.
Created by AnX
Malakh: You fool. No man can defeat me.
Courier: [Regenerates] I am no man.
Created by AnX
Agent: Boss, we have a serious Code Ace.
Natalia: It's not really a code if you say his name.

Created by Niv
Agatha: Ok. You got any ideas or do you just want to keep drinking?
Lone Wanderer: I think I need to keep drinking for a while and then I'll have an idea.

Created by AnX
Ace: When have I done anything rash or irresponsible?
Courier: I keep a list. It's alphabetized.

Created by Niv
Courier: Oh look, it's Natalia and her agent.
Agent: Hello, I have a name?
Courier: Which I can never remember.

Created by AnX
Violet: Bert, can I speak to you for a minute?
Courier: Ooooh, someone's in trouble. It's me. I don't know why I did that.

Created by Niv
Spot: Must you always attack me with words?
Malakh: Would you prefer rocks?
Created by Niv
Agent: I think the words you're searching for are "I surrender".
Courier: The words I'm searching for I can't say because Kiki is present.
Created by Niv
Agent: Look, I'm sick of lying around. Help me up.
Courier: Natalia believes you're not strong enough to undertake such a mission.
Agent: Yeah, whatever. [tries to get up, rolls off the bed and lands on the floor with a thud]
Courier: [looking down at him] Natalia is usually correct in such matters.

Created by AnX
[5 Years ago]
Hostage #2: How long have you been a hero?
Wonderful Scarf: What time is it?
Ace [an older regeneration]: It's 12:22 a.m.
Wonderful Scarf: About seven hours.

Created by Niv
Courier: Admit it, you appreciate me a little.
Agent: Microscopically.
Created by Niv
Vela: Did Vela just kill the Courier!?
Malakh: No, he's just bleeding internally and being a total baby about it.
Created by Niv
"Look, this is the way it works: first, I actually commit a crime, THEN you get to blame me for it."
- Courier, trying to explain to Agent why he's being a dick

## BunnyHat-07/13/2016

Created by Niv
Natalia: I'm picking up a strange reading from right over there.
Courier: Define "strange".
Natalia: You don't know what "strange" means?

Created by Niv
Agent: Need some sleep, Dr. Simonson?
Natalia: Um, no?
Agent: You have bags under your eyes.
Natalia: It's... a look I'm going for.

## BunnyHat-07/13/2016

Created by Niv
Jack: [disguised as an Orion agent] Hey! You there! Controlling the heroes! It may be obvious to you who I really am, but no telling the Courier, or else!
Created by Niv
Malakh: Oh no! I don't give my name to demons! Just watch as Malakh punishes you for your badness!
Created by Niv
Natalia: If you're looking for the Green Orb, I hid it in the Whoa Zone.
Courier: The Whoa Zone? You can't be serious. I demand answers.(edited)

Created by Niv
Malakh: Hey, what's your beef?
Vela: Beef? Vela is lacking in beef. Vela is beefless.

Created by Niv
Sensory: Rahamut. He's finally gone.
Plague Doctor: Yeah. Pretty tough dude, all around.
Sensory: And the Courier? Is he okay?
Plague Doctor: Oh yeah! I forgot! Now I can kidnap him!
Sensory: Oops. I spoke too soon.

Created by Niv
Water Leader: We who are not worthy of the mighty Rahamut's personal rescue must honor him...
Fire Leader: We, the Elemental Leaders, have attempted to find a suitable way to express our deep gratitude...
Earth Leader: [turns right] And so we hereby present an invigorating and inspiring dance of utter joy and happiness...
Electric Leader: [turns right] No, wait. We talked this over, Jerry, remember? We were gonna sing a song of Rahamut praise?
Rahamut: Forget it, minions! Let's get a move on!
[Rahamut turns around]
Snake Leader: [turns left] Just a sec. I thought we'd build a monument to his strength!
[Rahamut starts walking out]
Horse Leader: [turns down-left to Snake Leader; Rahamut stops after a couple steps] No, we were going to make his favorite food, right?
Ice Leader: [turns up-left to Earth Leader] Not me—I voted for polishing his jewelry with velvet shammies...
Wind Leader: We DECIDED this, remember? It was foot massage all the way!
[Rahamut turns]
Water Leader: [turns up] I still think that taking lutes and singing praises is sweet...
Fire Leader: [turns left] Is flossing his teeth still on the table? Because they are NASTY.
Ice Leader: [turns down-left to Earth Leader] No kidding. In fact, we should do a full orthodontic overhaul.
Horse Leader: [turns up-left to Snake Leader] OK, we'll have Alpha Team hit the cavities, then deploy two--
Rahamut: [yelling] QUIET! MOVE IT!
Elemental Leaders: [turn to face Rahamut again, cheering] ONWARDS!

## BunnyHat-07/13/2016

Created by Niv
Natalia: There are four fundamental forces between particles: 1, Gravity, which obeys this inverse-square law. [shows equation]
E-Com Head: Okay...
Natalia: 2, Electromagnetism, which obeys this inverse-square law. [shows equation] [softly] ...and also Maxwell's equations.
E-Com Head: Also what?
Natalia: 3, The Strong Nuclear Force, which obeys, uh... ...well, umm... it holds protons and neutrons together.
E-Com Head: I see.
Natalia: It's strong.
Natalia: And 4, The Weak Force. It [mumble mumble] Radioactive Decay [mumble mumble].
E-Com Head: That's not a sentence. You just said "Radioactive"--
Natalia: --And those are the four fundamental forces!
Natalia: Of these four forces, there's one we don't really understand.
E-Com Head: Is it the weak or the strong-
Natalia: It's gravity.

## BunnyHat-07/13/2016

Created by Niv
Agent: I saw a cute girl outside the bank today. She looked nice.
Courier: Oh no, not again. You are the worst judge of these things.
Agent: But she was so sweet. Shy, but there was something in her eyes. A pain down in her soul, the same as the one down in mine.
Courier: Mm hmm.
Agent: The police lights played through her white hair like the sun setting through pine trees as she shoveled the third hooker into the trunk of the camry...
Courier: Back up.

Created by Niv
Sigma: Explain to me this "steroid scandal".
Natalia: Well, uh... we humans are sacks of chemicals which stay alive by finding other chemicals and putting them inside of us. We hold contests to see which humans are the fastest and strongest. But some humans eat chemicals that make them too fast and strong. And they win contests!
Sigma: That does sound bad.
Natalia: It's awful!

Created by Niv
[Courier is playing Natalia in chess]
Courier: [thinking] (Why is chess so hard? Maybe the answers lie within me. Maybe I just need to let go, relax, and let my instincts and subconscious speak.)
[MEDITATE]
[KNIGHT TO G-4]
Courier: ...
Courier: That's not even a legal move.
[Okay, hold on. How do pawns capture again?]
Courier: Man, Obi-Wan was full of crap.

## BunnyHat-07/13/2016

Created by Niv
Courier: Wow- Engines can burn vegetable oil.
Natalia: Well, sure. You can burn most any organic matter. Corns, leaves, spices...
Courier: Spices? Really?
Natalia: Sure - Mussolini made the trains run on thyme.
Courier: ... We are no longer friends.

Created by Niv
Respi: [at work] The eagle has left the nest.
Agent: -khhhkht- Roger that. Alert the agents. -khhhkht-
Respi: Will you stop that?

Created by Niv
Respi: [at work] The eagle has left the nest.
Agent: -khhhkht- Roger that. Alert the agents. -khhhkht-
Respi: Will you stop that?
Created by Niv
Malakh: He's heading for that small moon.
Jack: That's no moon - it's a space station.
Malakh: It's too big to be a space station.
Jack: But it's too small to be a moon.
[THREE HOURS PASS]
Malakh: Fine! What if we agree it's not a moon, but we make a new category called "dwarf moon"?
Jack: And what's the cutoff, asshole?! Is this ship a dwarf moon now?
Malakh: Screw you.
Created by Niv
Agent: Courier.
Natalia: Justin! Come in.
Courier: "Justin?" Uh, his first name is "Agent."
Created by Niv
Blair: I will help you.
Két: Is that a promise?
Blair: It's more than a promise. It's a pinky promise.
Blair (later): That promise launched a friendship so grand it takes 103 scrapbooks to capture.

July 14, 2016

## BunnyHat-07/14/2016

Created by Niv
Agent: -looking over a datapad-
Vela: Suit Man.
Agent: What-?
Vela: -standing there, arms open-
[pause]
Agent: Vela. What are you doing...?
Vela: Vela has been informed by Courier that you will fall dangerously ill if you do not engage in this act of "hugging" with a force that no human can generate. Since Vacive are super strong compared to humans, Vela is the best candidate to assist Suit Man. Also, Vela thinks that if suit man gets sick then bad stuff will happen. Courier has said that Suit Man will resist- Do not.
[cut to Courier in the console room, laughing to himself]
Courier: Holy shit she actually did it
Agent: [on the viewscreen] COURIER!!!

July 20, 2016

## BunnyHat-07/20/2016

Created by Met:
Atiin: I am going to taco bell, y'all want anything?
Rinyn: I want my mom back.
Atiin: Yeah, I got like 12 dollars.
Created by Niv:
Courier: Am I going too far?
Agent: No, no, no. You went too far seven hours ago. Now you're going to prison.
Created by Niv:
Plague Doctor: May I get you anything to drink?
Malakh: The tears of our enemies wrenched from their bodies as their bones are crushed.
Plague Doctor: I have jasmine tea.
Malakh: Ooh, jasmine.(edited)

## BunnyHat-07/20/2016

Created by Niv
Agent: Let me speak with the Courier.
Kid Stunning: He's... in the bathroom.
Agent: Oh. Well, let me talk to Vela.
Kid Stunning: She's... in the bathroom.
Agent: They're both in the bathroom? What are they doing in there?
Kid Stunning:
Kid Stunning: I have to go to the bathroom.
Created by Niv
Khem: I can fend for myself.
Kaveh: But you’re not just fending for yourself, you’re fending for two. Let’s be honest, Khem, right now you waddle.
Khem: I don’t waddle.
Kaveh: Oh ho ho, yes you do.
Khem: I’ll admit I may be a little less graceful, but I don’t waddle.
Kaveh: You’re right, actually it’s more of a teeter.
Created by Niv
"You’re a savvy woman… who could easily consider world domination as a next career move."
-Courier [to Natalia]
Created by Niv
Verynal: Michi, do you think that maybe someday you might want to get married and have kids?
Michi: No.
Verynal: But what if you met the right man, who worshiped and adored you? Who'd do anything for you? Who'd be your devoted slave? Then what would you do?
Michi: I'd pity him.
Created by Niv
Cofar: Tea, you’re an adult. You can’t live your life afraid of what our family thinks.
Tea: Cofar, it’s not gonna be like this forever. One day they’ll die.
Created by Niv
Black Hole Jack: You have gone too far. You have married a planetlubber, you have abandoned this crew, and you've publicly humiliated the first mate. All that I could forgive. But Aster...
Aster: What?
Black Hole Jack: ...pastels?
Created by Niv
Courier: So you attribute every relationship I’ve ever had to the height of my cheekbones?
Vela: Not the whole relationship, just the beginning.
Brutalibre: The rest is your hair.
Created by Niv
"You’ll meet someone, Time Hunter. Someone very special. Someone who won’t press charges."
-Courier

Created by Niv
Courier: Mav, pay attention!
Mav: What? I thought you had finished!
Courier: You see my lips still moving, this means I'm still talking!
Sensory: Yeah, but you could have been yawning or... chewing.
Created by Niv
"When I’m around you, I kind of feel like I’m on drugs. Not that I do drugs. Unless you do drugs, in which case I do them all the time. All of them."
 -Kaiden [to Rinyn]
Created by Niv
Leon: The chances of a relationship between yourself and Rinyn are not promising. You two are of a completely different caliber.
Kaiden: Leon, just cause she isn't that smart doesn't mean she's not important.
Leon: The higher caliber I was referring to, Kaiden, was hers.
Created by Niv
Courier: If you want something bad, you have to fight for it. Step up your game, Agent. Break out the L-word.
Agent: Lesbian?
Courier: The other L-word.
Agent: ...Lesbians?
Created by Niv
Mav: If it's a concussion, you have to keep her conscious, okay? Ask her questions.
Courier [to Vela]: What's seven times seven?
Vela: Stuff he knows!

Created by Niv
Rinyn: [Laying in the shuttle after her fight with Rom Mohc] I want you to avenge me, Kaiden.
Kaiden: Rinyn, you’re not dying.
Rinyn: AVENGE ME!

Created by Niv
Natalia: And what was that all about?
Agent: What was what all about?
Natalia: I assume you’ve heard the term “passive-aggressive”?
Agent: I wasn’t being passive-aggressive.
Natalia: No, you were being aggressive-aggressive.

Created by Met
[They are on a mission to rescue some sort of a noble baby for political purposes]
Atiin: -kicks door in- -background theme music plays loudly- ALRIGHT, WHO WANTS SOME ASS KICKI-
Mandalorians: -turns to him- -raises fingers to their mouth- SHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Atiin: ........
Mandalorians: -raises hand in direction of a sleeping baby-
Atiin: .... -starts hitting them with his minigun-
Mandalorians: -starts wrestling with him, pulling punches and stabbing-
Atiin: -flings them off and swipes a dagger off of his shoulder and flings it at one of the Mandalorian-
Mandalorian: -gets stabbed- ........ -picks up a pillow and screams in it-

Created by Niv
Agent: Gotta hand it to you Courier, you make me look good.
Courier: Yeah? How?
Agent: You suck worse than I do.

Created by Niv
Courier: I’m sorry, did I- Did I just mishear you or did you agree with me?
Agent: Oh, I want to take it back.

Created by Niv
Leon: Spontaneous combustion is a form of harm, Rar Jar.
Rar Jar: Nonsense! The Stormtroopers wouldn’t feel a thing.

July 22, 2016

## BunnyHat-07/22/2016

Created by Niv
Darrien: I have like a ton of followers.
Respi: On what app?
Darrien: App? I'm the leader of a cult.
Respi: ...suddenly I have to go.

Created by Niv
[Darrien is holding Respi hostage to negotiate with the Plague Doctor]
Darrien: Now, Plague Doctor, was it? Do as I say, or your little Plague Carrier dies.
Plague Doctor: Oh, no, by all means, go ahead.
Darrien: ...I'm sorry, what? Do you just not care about her?
Plague Doctor: I do, don't get me wrong, but that's sort of an impossible threat when it comes to Respi.
Darrien: ...How so?
Respi: This so. -snaps her own neck to get out of Darrien's grip, revives fully healed like five seconds later-
Darrien:
Respi: Kay bye! -darts off-
Plague Doctor: Now, I believe we were negotiating?
Darrien: Actually, I suddenly am in the mood to reconsider.

Created by Niv
Plague Doctor: Ah, Hawlucha, was it?
Brutalibre: -gasp- How did you almost know my name?!
Plague Doctor: I have approximate knowledge of many things.

July 23, 2016

## BunnyHat-07/23/2016

Created by Niv
Rahamut: [creates shadows around his hands] Care to dance?
Plague Doctor: [tugs on gloves] Love to!
Rahamut: Excellent!
Plague Doctor: … let’s be clear, right? When you say “dance,” you mean “fight.” You don’t really wanna dance.
Rahamut: Correct, fight not dance. Sorry, did you wanna dance?
Plague Doctor: No! Really - come on, kinda weird!
Rahamut: You know, sorry, this face-off isn’t going great. Would you mind terribly if we started over?
Plague Doctor: Yeah, sure.
[Rahamut turns off the shadows, clears his throat, and creates them again]
Rahamut: Well, well, well! If it isn’t the soon-to-be-dead Plague Doctor!
Plague Doctor: Oh, much better!
Created by Niv (tweeked by Nase)
James: Check her out. Is she hot, or is she hot?
Agent: She’s Respi.
James: Respi. I like that. The girl’s so hot, she’s Respi.
Agent: … that’s her name, Sam.
Created by Niv
"This is the crack team that foils my every plan? I am deeply shamed."
— Rahamut, [about the TARDIS crew]
Created by Niv
Agent: Where’s your gatekeeper? Any Tom, Dick, or Harry can just waltz right in.
Blockade: Well, I don’t see any Toms or Harrys here, but—
Created by Niv
Respi: Agent, has anyone told you you’re an exquisite soprano?
Agent: …
Agent: What do you want, Respi?
Created by Niv
Naje: You hand me the necklace… I won’t have to take out my claws. Which would be really excellent for you.
Agatha: I can’t be the first person who has difficulty taking you seriously.
Naje: While that is a moderately clever retort… I’m the one with the claws.
Created by Niv
Courier: What the hell is wrong with you?
Plague Doctor: People say I am emotionally unavailable.
Created by Niv
Dupree: Time Hunter, you look nice.
Time Hunter: Thank you! So do I.
Dupree: [to Respi] Now I see what you’re always talking about.
Time Hunter: What was that supposed to mean?
Respi: What do you think it means? It means you’re a dick.
Time Hunter: Fair point. I just didn’t know that she knew that.
Respi: Everyone knows that.

Created by Niv
Rahamut: This day has been rather disappointing, I don’t mind saying.
Sensory: Why, because you didn’t get to kill everyone?
Rahamut: There’s gonna come a time, girl, when you will wish you never met me.
Sensory: Mister, I’m already there!
Created by Niv
Rahamut: Just inform me the minute Plague Doctor arrives.
Horse Leader: Oh, she’s here!
Rahamut: What! Plague Doctor is here and you didn’t tell me?
Horse Leader: I’m a horse! A worthless Horse Leader!
Rahamut: Memo to me… Memo to me: maim you after my meeting.
Created by Niv
Sensory: You said you had a plan for killing Respi.
Agent: I do have a plan. Trouble is, it won’t work.
Created by Niv
"It’s a difficult thing, isn’t it, taking a life? Feeling the weight and responsibility of all the years the person you’ve murdered has lived - moments that they’ve cherished, the dreams that they’ve struggled towards gone, because of you. I want you to know something. Something important that I’ve learned: that it gets easier the more you do it."
— Plague Doctor
Created by Niv
Agent: I need you to speak with Natalia.
James: Me? The hell am I gonna say to her?
Agent: Reassure her that everything is fine.
James: So, you want me to lie.