Rowleys snake sitting service

113.Eleven-year-old Rowley Jefferson was a peculiar fellow, perhaps in a way that would make you scratch your head in amusement. A boy of unusual peculiarities, he still wore diapers, savoured the most unconventional food like shit and reveled in the comfort of potty’s, pacifiers, pushchairs, and cots. To anyone unacquainted with Rowley, his behavioural quirks were about as odd as they came. There wasn't a mental condition that his behaviours lined up with—they were simply just...Rowley.

One day, as Rowley and his father amused themselves ribbing at photos of Katie Piper online until tears streamed from their eyes, they received a surprise visitor. Mr. Strong, a towering hulk of a man, clad in his customary tan trench coat, marched into the room with an air of business. He handed over a caged snake, saying, “This is my pet, and I'm heading off on holiday." With that, he showered the pair with an absurd amount of money, over £100,000 with a straight face, leaving Rowley and his parents astonished.

Word about "Rowley's Snake Sitting Service" coursed around the neighbourhood like wildfire. Unanticipated snake-sitting clients swarmed in, their squirming, scaly pets cradled in their loving arms. All of a sudden, their wholesome residence had transformed into a bustling snake eco-system.

One eventful day, Rowley was lounging in his room, perched on his bed, engrossed in his favourite comic when a peculiar sensation pricked him on his bum—one of the serpents had managed to gift him a bite. But instead of wailing in anguish, as any normal child might have, he merely let out an ecstatic chuckle. "Aaaaaahhhhh," he voiced, the rings of pleasure evident in his voice.

And then, Mrs. Lazenbee made her entrance — a diminutive woman adorning rectangular specs and a taciturn countenance. She gingerly pushed forward a humongous cage, containing a Green Anaconda—one of the biggest snakes in the world. Rowley’s eyes widened, but he accepted the challenge with resolute courage.

Little did Rowley know, though, how to feed these exotic creatures. Days passed and paunches shrank, starvation-induced irritability began to dance in the snakes' eyes. While most of them scavenged whatever they could find in the kitchen, the Green Anaconda had a slightly 'larger' taste. In a swift move, it lunged at Rowley's portly dad and swallowed him whole.

The aftermath was grotesque — Rowley's poor father was too much for the Anaconda to handle. Overwhelmed by its swollen belly's pressure, the snake exploded on the spot, scattering the gruesome remains of Rowley's father's skeleton all over the room.

Alien to fear, Rowley reported the incident to its owner, Mrs. Lazenbee. However, she responded with disturbing equanimity, saying, "Well, that's alright. At least my Green Anaconda had a nice last supper."

And so, amidst this absurd, gut-wrenching situation, Rowley and Mrs. Lazenbee held a funeral for the late Green Anaconda whose last supper had been incredibly fulfilling, rather too fulfilling. With the bizarre events that unfolded, Rowley's taste for suspense and adventure had been sated—he decided to stick with the seemingly safer route of laughing at online photos with high creativity.

And thus ended the saga of Rowley's Snake Sitting Service—an unforgettable chapter in the colourful diary of Rowley Jefferson's life.