The War of Pickles II

The War of Pickles II was a deadly war in which the rumours were confirmed that a former Derpling who ate a poisoned pickle. She was transformed into a pickle, presumably irreversibly. With some Derp magic left in herself, she became the most powerful pickle and took the throne as the Supreme Pickle I's successor. She is known now as the Supreme Pickle II.

The battle is still ongoing, and the amount of casualties is rising; however, the amount of casualties is significant only for the pickles. The war began April the twenty-ninth, 2018.

## History

### Causes

Rumours were about the Derpy Dimension. Both young and old were exchanging information about Pickland, part of it now teleported to the Derpy Dimension and under Adamoy's rule. Unfortunately, it was also rumoured that the Derpling poisoned by the pickle that started the War of Pickles I had been crowned the Supreme Pickle II. Eventually, the rumour disappeared for some time, leading government officials to believe otherwise.

However, the rumours sprouted again, and DerpyMcDerpell had noticed a puddle of pickle juice while shopping at Derpzville. He called Adamoy to see if he had noticed any, assuming it would be a prank if not; however, Adamoy responded saying that he thought he saw one at the local grocery store.

DerpyMcDerpell immediately called all government officials to begin a mission after seeing protests in the streets of the conquered parts of Pickland; they wanted independence, but DerpyMcDerpell knew they would abuse it and massacre Derplings without being under the Derpy Dimension's law. It would eventually lead to all-out war with the pickles again.

### The Mission

DerpyMcDerpell first needed to confirm the Supreme Pickle II actually existed. He reached two people, Jake and Rackepte, he thought could aid Adamoy's agent on a mission to Pickle Palace, which had been repaired at the centre of Pickland. A portal was prepared to send them to the Pickland, a dangerous dimension. DerpyMcDerpell and Adamoy seated themselves in a special room in Derp Castle where they could talk to the spies without anyone else hearing and also see through special lenses worn by the three spies.

Adamoy's spy, Meloneesha, lead the way. She knew the perfect entrance to the capital city. By the time they arrived, many of the guards were off their shifts and were heading back to an apartment close to Pickle Palace. They sneaked into the apartment before the guards and climbed to the top floor. The three spies shined a blinding light (they closed their eyes) at the top window, attracting almost every guard that wasn't leaving. The guards ran to their beloved home immediately, assuming it was terrorism.

Meloneesha stayed in the apartment to fight the guards and told Jake and Rackepte to go to the palace. DerpyMcDerpell was afraid Meloneesha would die, but Adamoy assured him she was an amazing fighter and had once taken out an entire army with him. Jake and Rackepte reluctantly jumped off the apartment and stealthily got into the palace.

Meloneesha hid in a room and assassinated every pickle she could without alerting the others. Her silenced potato gun and cookie knives were especially useful. She eventually found twenty pickles in one room but skillfully defeated them all in one slice with her knife. Meloneesha continued fighting for the rest of the mission but had been hit in the face, causing her lenses to crack; however, her eyes were protected by the lenses, but they were now unusable.

Jake and Rackepte were also armed with potato guns. They hid in a basement to hide in case there were any remaining guards. Under a staircase, they found several jars of pickles labelled "DO NOT EAT". DerpyMcDerpell immediately knew what this meant: These were deadly. Adamoy spotted a guard coming down the stairs, but luckily, the two had seen the jars and had already went under the staircase. Jake and Rackepte shot the guard in the head immediately.

Her body tumbled down the stairs, but she was a pickle, so it made little sound. The guard was dead. The potatoes had both exited through the front of her head, and pickle juice was everywhere. Rackepte had luckily brought along a silent pickle juice vacuum. He cleaned the juice as Jake hid her body.

The two Derplings headed upstairs and found a large door in an enormous but ugly corridor (the pickles make ugly architecture for royal buildings). They tried to find another way in but failed. DerpyMcDerpell and Adamoy urged the two to keep looking, but Jake became impatient and knocked on the door. A female voice boomed and asked, "Who is it?! You can't come in now, anyways. Don't even bother."

Jake tried to open the door, but it was secured by a pickle guard–only sensor. Rackepte, however, had an idea. He pulled out the vacuum and set it on spray mode. He sprayed the guard's pickle juice all over the sensor, and the door opened. There was no turning back.

"Ah. Oh my. Looks like you've revealed me," the Supreme Pickle II said as she rolled her eyes. Her throne transformed into a hot-air balloon. The roof opened up, and the palace boomed with a voice that seemed to shake the place. Red lights were flashing, and several guards shouted as they entered the room.

"Derplings! DERPLINGS!" shouted a guard. They all aimed weapons, most feudal, at the two spies. Jake warned them that attacking a Derpy Ruler would start a war without question. The pickles did not care, and there were so many, it was hard for the two to fight, and DerpyMcDerpell and Adamoy had lost connection.

"Okay," said DerpyMcDerpell, still at the special room at Derp Castle. He knew going to Pickland himself would only cause chaos on both sides, so he made a hard decision with Adamoy. The two walked down into the dungeons of Derp Castle to see a prisoner. And this was a terrible prisoner.

"Hello, kids," sneered the Supreme Pickle I's wife. She looked up and laughed. She knew she was about to be released for a deal. She knew what it was going to be. She knew she would have her throne back once she helped fight for the Derplings in the war. "Yes, I'll do it."

Jake and Rackepte still had their hands up. They were forced to kick their weapons over to the pickles and were nervous about keeping their lives. The pickles laughed and moved in closer. They mocked them and were about to stab them. One guard smirked and lifted a sword high, watching it shine in the sunlight coming from the open roof. Then a shadow took it over.

The Supreme Pickle I's wife leaped down and crushed the pickle with her feet. She pulled out a knife and pointed it at every pickle in the room. They all seemed shocked that she was alive and backed away slowly, dropping their weapons.

"You did *not* just do that! You did not betray me and serve the second 'Supreme Pickle'!" she shouted. They all bowed their heads and kneeled to her. They all asked for mercy and forgiveness, and she did. She let them have life but did not let them keep their limbs. She sliced them all off and kicked them down the stairs of the basement.

"Well? Coming or not?" Her black cape (it was purple on the inside and black on the outside) flapped as artificial wind filled the room. "Your call," she muttered. She soared into the air—back into the Derpy Dimension, right through a portal.

Jake and Rackepte were confused and frightened, but DerpyMcDerpell and Adamoy got connection back up again. Adamoy spoke loudly into their ears as if he was right next to them and hissed humorously, "Well? What are you waiting for? More guards? Go on!"

Jake grabbed Rackepte by the arm and followed the former Queen of Pickland into the portal. The war had definitely started now. The three safely returned, but no one knew where Meloneesha was, and since her lenses were broken, no one could find out.

The war is still going, and what happens next will be written here. I have a lot planned for the article, but for now, I'm leaving you on a cliffhanger! :3