I'm Extreme Air-Podding Right Now/Confessionals

## Day 31

Alyssa is playing the game I wish I could, smh.

John and i basically talked for 3 hours straight his perspective on the game is really different from mine, i cant tell if it's bullshit but his reasoning seemed sound as did the conclusions he drew from it He thinks Himself/Jacob/Me/Alyssa are the big threats in this game We both think that Alyssa most likely has the idol However, it's a bit complicated because everyone got to step 150 at around the same time so it's possible that any number of people have it I personally do not think that he or Elise have it He said his read on Jacob was that he didn't have it either and that Disc was a day behind both of them with finding it Which makes the likely culprit either Caeleb or Alyssa but Caeleb didn't have consistent information access from either side unless someone leaked to him But that could be possible through Alyssa so bottom line i think it's one of them but probably Alyssa just because she had consistent information I don't know if we'll be able to act on that I want immunity this round just because that sorta frees me from the consequences of being betrayed for at least one round The reason why is because I want one of Caeleb or Alyssa gone Normally I have a pretty clear sense of what's best to do in order to further my game (or rather which player I need to eliminate in order to further my game the most, not necessarily the actions needed to accomplish that as evidenced by this last vote) I don't, in this instance I sincerely don't I could be a complete goat or only have one win condition or I could win a variety of F3 and F2 combinations And it's so frustrating to be in that position

My back is to the wall, but I can't play like that. Desperation is a big red flag in Survivor. No, I have to make a new alliance based on mutual agreements and make sure it's strong. The problem is, I do not want to take John to the end. But Disc? I suppose I want Jackson and Disc with me, they're my best chances now. Caeleb and Alyssa have run the game for a long time, Jacob and John are the key players, and while Disc had a hand in it he's been more UTR (at least on my end) about the game. They're all playing amazingly. I have to step it up, because I see an army of threats and dodgy opportunities. I'm boutta make alliances that feel as genuine as buying a TV out of a van while police sirens blare in the background.

## Day 32

My fear is that Alyssa is going to idol, or the votes really are for me and I'm anxious for good reason. I have to have faith in this vote though, so I'll see what happens. The strange thing is, Alyssa hasn't asked to call, so I'm definitely worried.
Why would they believe in a split like that? Equally, why would they just make a throwaway alliance - unless it's fake to me trust them. All I know is, the vote is either me or Jackson from Alyssa's POV and voting in this split feels like the right risk for me. If it's a mistake, so be it, but it seems to be the right decision. Especially if it solidifies a connection with 3 of the other 5 who will remain. My jury threat level has significantly dropped, which may just keep me alive, meanwhile I can get myself back into a great social position going into the endgame at F5.