recursal/Fanatic-Fandom huggingface dataset:
The Grand Coronation Hotel - Part 5

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

### **The Field Vs. Fields Controversy**

Typically an IYRLU would begin with:

> "...and if you like us, right now, you love us Sally Field and the whole deal..."
>
>
>

For a period of time "Field" was used interchangeably with "Fields", and there is a minor on going jokey dispute between cast members as to the correct useage to this day.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Plane of (Fore)Shadow - Part 3

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Some Assembly Required

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Dropping Eaves

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Oathtaker

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc (Shoutout to community member Thesi for reminding me how to spell Didoo):

Buy a farm, a whole farm, it's going to be expensive so you may have to save up for a while, but buy a farm, get all the different animals, and dress each up as your favorite specific characters. I'm curious to see which animal will be which character for sure, I already know what Didoo is going to be and have them your favorite episode of the Hapless Heroes for anyone willing to pay for it.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Point and Shift

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Utilitize a public transportation system of your choice. Choose an incredulous interjection of your choice, and action of your choice. And upon said public transportation vehicle/device/whathaveyou. Say something along the lines of "WHOOH, doggies! Did my momma just bake a pie, or does it smell like Hapless Heroes inside this here vehicle."

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
Hapless Heroes Wiki

**Welcome to the Hapless Heroes Wiki!**
A wiki discussing the D&D podcast Hapless Heroes

We're a collaborative community website about Hapless Heroes that anyone, including you, can build and expand. Wikis like this one depend on readers getting involved and adding content. Click the "ADD NEW PAGE" or "EDIT" button at the top of any page to get started!

## Important articles

Episode Guide

Player Characters

Story Arcs

Locations

Factions

NPCs

If You Really Love Us

*Need help building out this community?*

* Rules of this wiki
* Getting Started
* How to Contribute
* Managing your new community
* Guides
* All Help articles

You can also be part of the larger Fandom family of communities. Visit Fandom's Community Central!

*Community Founders*: Write a good and paragraph-length description for your welcome section about your topic. Let your readers know what your topic is about and add some general information about it. Then you should visit the admin dashboard for more tips.
Epilogue - Where Are They Now?

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Go watch a sunset and if it happens to be just perfectly cloudy where you do see those rays, peeking out behind the clouds fanning out in such a fashion. Make sure you are in a well populated area and say, "Oh my. Look at those occidental crepuscular rays."

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
A Fin in Time - Part 15 - Convergence

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Take a bicycle and bring it to an aquarium and go around to all the little fish tanks and say, "Hey, Mr. Fish. Do you need this? Do you need this bicycle, Mr. Fish?" and just keep going around talking to the fish, and when an aquarium attendant approaches you and tries to eject you from the aquarium, they say, "Listen, I get what you're doing. It's not funny. These fish obviously do not need this bicycle." and you'll say to them, "That may be true, none of these fish may need a bicycle, but you sir, you, need to listen to Hapless Heroes Podcast, An Original D&D Campaign." and they'll say, "Leave, get outta here. I've had enough of you. That tears it, that was the needle, that was the straw?, that was the needle-straw that broke my camelfish back. Leave."

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
Clang-a-geddon

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Have one of your friends create a podcast where you have a character that becomes beloved and then have a child you go missing then come back and have another child and go missing again then come back again in an epic rebirth with your god at your side and scream out to your listeners tell everyone to listen to Hapless Heroes

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
Full Play 3 - Part 2 - Pre-Ritualizing

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

### **The Field Vs. Fields Controversy**

Typically an IYRLU would begin with:

> "...and if you like us, right now, you love us Sally Field and the whole deal..."
>
>
>

For a period of time "Field" was used interchangeably with "Fields", and there is a minor on going jokey dispute between cast members as to the correct useage to this day.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Plane of (Fore)Shadow - Part 2

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Bonework Rumble

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
A Fin in Time - Part 33 - Facting the Future Pt. 1

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Take a baton for fire dancing and light that bad boy on fire and do a performance of a very impressive fire baton twirling routine on your front yard, or sidewalk, or balcony, or on your roof, or whatever means you have to display such a thing with great flair, or safer location, and that location you'll have a banner that says "Download and listen to Hapless Heroes Podcast." At the grand finale light that thing on fire

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
The Master Will Be Displeased - Part 2

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Literally go to the Hapless Heroes merch store at spreadshirt.com and rep this podcast gear. There is so much stuff on there, there's even a, @Nicole/Boris the Butcher even designed a dog bandana that says "a-ruff...a-ruff" and it would make me so happy to see pictures of that bandana on all of your pups. I think, it would literally light up my life. So do that, buy that dog bandana, put it on your pup, and they can be the greatest Ummm that has ever lived. (https://shop.spreadshirt.com/hapless-heroes/)

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
Double Dragon - Part 2

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Shameless Self-aggrandizement

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

### **The Field Vs. Fields Controversy**

Typically an IYRLU would begin with:

> "...and if you like us, right now, you love us Sally Field and the whole deal..."
>
>
>

For a period of time "Field" was used interchangeably with "Fields", and there is a minor on going jokey dispute between cast members as to the correct useage to this day.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
De-Ritualizing - Part 4

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Not Your Garden Variety Leprosy Case

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Hapless Recap 3 - The Beginning of the End(game)

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
The Lord Captain's Return

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

### **The Field Vs. Fields Controversy**

Typically an IYRLU would begin with:

> "...and if you like us, right now, you love us Sally Field and the whole deal..."
>
>
>

For a period of time "Field" was used interchangeably with "Fields", and there is a minor on going jokey dispute between cast members as to the correct useage to this day.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Heads in the Clouds

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Captain's Choice

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

I want a Hapless Heroes racecar that you race only before each race, you have to roll a d20 to see how well you are allowed to do in the race. So, if you roll a nat 1, you forgot your engine. If you roll a 20, you have to win. That's if you really love us.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
Vecnational Treasure - Part 3

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Contact whoever monitors the world record for how many times you can roll your eyes in an hour and say that you have the fodder to break whatever record that is held currently and when you inevitably break the world record for rolling your eyes in an hour, the amount of times that is, they'll say, and their old and british I think, "How, How, did you break such a long standing record for your rolling your eyes so many times an hour." and you'll say, "It's because I listen to the Hapless Heroes Podcast, of course, and it is stupid."

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
Aye Eyes on the Horizon

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Make yourself a Hapless Heroes Monster Truck, it can be a type of, whatever character, or however you want to design it. I had pictured a monster truck called Zero's Reason which is just a giant monster truck with a ballista on the back of it and when you obviously destroy all of the cars and do some sick wheelies and flips and all sorts of stuff, and win the monster truck competition, as you're accepting your monster truck award, just tell them to listen to the Hapless Heroes.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
The Truth is Out There

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

### **The Field Vs. Fields Controversy**

Typically an IYRLU would begin with:

> "...and if you like us, right now, you love us Sally Field and the whole deal..."
>
>
>

For a period of time "Field" was used interchangeably with "Fields", and there is a minor on going jokey dispute between cast members as to the correct useage to this day.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Full Play 3 Finale - Initial Success or Total Failure

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

### **The Field Vs. Fields Controversy**

Typically an IYRLU would begin with:

> "...and if you like us, right now, you love us Sally Field and the whole deal..."
>
>
>

For a period of time "Field" was used interchangeably with "Fields", and there is a minor on going jokey dispute between cast members as to the correct useage to this day.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Plane of (Fore)Shadow - Part 8

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Going Full Tarantino

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

### **The Field Vs. Fields Controversy**

Typically an IYRLU would begin with:

> "...and if you like us, right now, you love us Sally Field and the whole deal..."
>
>
>

For a period of time "Field" was used interchangeably with "Fields", and there is a minor on going jokey dispute between cast members as to the correct useage to this day.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Empty Pockets

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc. This week is the rare chance where there are two opportunities available to you if you really want to prove that ***You Really Love Us***:

- [1] So I was going to suggest making a Mount Rushmore out of mashed potatoes, but I think that would be too difficult so you can pick the four favorite characters of the Hapless Heroes and make a Mount Rushmore out of any potato-based substance of your choosing, if you really love us.

- [2] I would love to see someone write a Twelve days of Christmas song except it is Twelve Days of Telduria in the style of Hapless Heroes.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Smash Cut to Calamity - Part 2

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Start your own plant company, study horticulture, start breeding and propagating, and spreading the joy of verbacious life throughout the world, study your skills, perfect your skills, implement whatever technologies you deem fit, and discover a new plant. Name that plant, however poisonous it may be, after one of our faithful Hapless Heroes, and solidify our place in history, amongst plant lovers around the globe for all time.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
Meat Pockets

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Go and get a bunch of friends together and do a one-shot. A one-shot is pretty good, a couple of self contained episodes, it's real fun time, right? Have a couple of video cameras around, from a few different angles, and some good audio, and record it. Here's the difference, the kicker, here's where things are going to take a little bit of a change, taking a bit of a twist, lets say. Instead of releasing on the internet, or a DVD, or a compact disc, no let's go with a thoroughly obscure format, of the universal media disc. That little triangle shaped case that contained a dinky cd that slipped into the back of your psp and would eventually come with movies on it, yes, I do actually own a movie on it, but this is what you're going to do. You're going to find a way to distribute your one shot on a universal media disc (UMD), and in the liner notes give a shout out to the Hapless Heroes

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
A Fin in Time - Part 30 - Severed

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Pose as a citizen of the lost sunken continent of Atlantis and write a letter to the editor of your local newspaper and implore them to promote and listen to our podcast cause that is the only way to make Atlantis rise again and join the world then we'll all join hands and share in the bountiful Atlantian technology of medicine, and agriculture, and science, and magic, and dance moves probably, and we'll heal the world

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
Invasion Persuasion

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

### **The Field Vs. Fields Controversy**

Typically an IYRLU would begin with:

> "...and if you like us, right now, you love us Sally Field and the whole deal..."
>
>
>

For a period of time "Field" was used interchangeably with "Fields", and there is a minor on going jokey dispute between cast members as to the correct useage to this day.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Cool Guys Dont Look At Explosions

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Good Intentions vs Pure Evil - Part 2

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Just send us your favorite sandwich recipes and make them good

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
Igor's Challenge - Part 4

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

### **The Field Vs. Fields Controversy**

Typically an IYRLU would begin with:

> "...and if you like us, right now, you love us Sally Field and the whole deal..."
>
>
>

For a period of time "Field" was used interchangeably with "Fields", and there is a minor on going jokey dispute between cast members as to the correct useage to this day.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Ideals are Subjective

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Stage a breakdance competition, and invite the best of the best, you know all the breakdancing gang, cohorts, like The Punk Ninjas, The Golden Rhinos, The Techno Neptunes, you know, the bests of the best and have them all meet below the overpass, and break out your boom box, and you know what to play, that's right, our podcast until they can't take it anymore, and they really just need to get their break dances out, but at least try to get through a whole episode. Maybe stall, "Hey, I know this will work. This is not supposed to be happening, but maybe we'll just listen to this podcast while I get the actual song cued up." Expose people to our podcast, that maybe only breakdance regularly

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
The Final Recap (Of This Campaign) - Reflecting on the Last 7 Years

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
A Fin in Time - Part 32 - Unity

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

I have a mission for you dear listener find the Great American Novel. Now note that I said find, not write, find, for there is great news the Great American Novel has already been written there's also bad news: I'm not entirely sure which one it is but I do know it was written by Chuck Tingle unfortunately his bibliography is, well, shall we say extensive and horrible, but somewhere in there is the Great American Novel and you dear listener if you really love us will go delve through that pile and find it for us

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
Let's Wreck

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

### **The Field Vs. Fields Controversy**

Typically an IYRLU would begin with:

> "...and if you like us, right now, you love us Sally Field and the whole deal..."
>
>
>

For a period of time "Field" was used interchangeably with "Fields", and there is a minor on going jokey dispute between cast members as to the correct useage to this day.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
The Eye(s) of the Beholder - Part 2

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Striking the Right Tone

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Field Testing

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Learn an instrument, specifically a lute in Hedric's favor and you can broadcast your own waves of inspiration throughout your family, your friends, your coworkers, hell even strangers in Hedric's favor. You can play all the Hapless Heroes songs sung by yours truly, @Phil/Hedric the Entertainer, which can be found on Hedric's Favorites Volume 1 located in the Hapless Heroes Patreon. Pick up your copy, digital only, henceforth, Signing Off

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
A Fin in Time - Part 17 - Culinary Catastrophe

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Go to your supermarket and go to the beefsteak tomatoes, and just start taking one tomato at a time and putting them under the old armpit, and smashing them up into a good tomato crushing paste, and they'll try to interrupt that and you'll have to say "No, this is the way I was taught to make the old fashioned tomaty sauce by my favorite podcast 'The Hapless Hero Podcast An Original D&D Campaign'. Don't stop me from making my tomaty sauce. I have to finish."

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
A Fin in Time - Part 1

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

Get a porcupine costume and make it, sort of, cyborg related, and modify it with robot parts, and appendages, and apertures, and armatures, cyborgcupine, and plop yourself in a public square and explain to the people (In a robot voice), "Hello, I am Cyborgcupine. I came from the future. The only way to save your present is by listening to Hapless Heroes Podcast." Then breakdance like a robot, and play our podcast for the public.

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!
Between Two Ferns

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## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

Special thanks to [audio people] for use of their [services and FX].
Dragons on Deck

* N/A

## **If You Really Love Us**

***Also known as:** "A Zach" affectionately refering to him as the originator of the popular end of show feature.*

Each week an off the wall suggestion about how to promote the podcast is made to the audience, with the explicit understanding that anything illegal, otherworldly or simply impossible is meant with tongue firmly placed in cheek. Some of them (the legal ones) have actually been possible.

This week's ***If You Really Love Us*** is lovingly transcribed by community member Reinhoc:

You're all by yourself. The wind is blowing. You can almost hear an echo from the mountains around you. It's picturesque and you're struck by inspiration. Hair style. It's very definitive and describes you as a person and it's very expression is part of you. For the men, you can grow a luscious beard and shave that beard on the sides and in the center of your lip and below the soul patch creating a perfectly formed H pattern on the front of your face just below your mouth and of course will bring plenty of conversation which you're welcome to share about our lovely Hapless Heroes Podcast and for the ladies I'm afraid you'll have to shave the back of your head and put a wonderful beauteous H where you can let your hair hang down and make the H extra long and it can be upper case H and everyone will be talking about it. Bonus Points: Forming your beard or shave the back of your head with the words "Hapless Heroes Podcast"

## **External Links**

Reddit

Discord

## **Credits**

As always, a BIG thanks to Tim @ https://tabletopaudio.com for providing the SFX and ambiences used in this episode and beyond!