Linda La Hughes

**Linda La Hughes** (born 5th December 1960 as **Linda Hughes**) is a resident of 69 Paradise Passage and the former flatmate of Tom Farrell. She is also the neighbour of Jez Littlewood and Suze Littlewood. The sister of famous celebrity, Sharon La Hughes AKA "Sugar Walls", Linda is a loudmouthed ginger and, to most people, unattractive woman.

## Biography

### Early Life

Linda was born in Portsmouth. When Linda was young she was very close to her mother and father but never liked her sister, Sharon.

At some point, Linda was put into a borstal and met Shirley Twitch. Her mother also wrote to her and sent her food packages regulary

Eventually, her mother accidentally electrocuted herself and passed away, leaving Linda devastated.

Sometime later she changed her name from Linda Hughes to Linda La Hughes.

At some point Linda had an affair with an unnamed man and later gave birth to his son, Zippy. However, Linda later gave him up for adoption and moved on with her life.

Later on in her life, Linda met Tom Farrell at a nightclub and two eventually moved into 69 Paradise Passage together.

### Meeting Jez and Suze

One morning, Linda woke up to the sound of her land lord, Beryl Merit, trimming a hedge in the front yard. Annoyed, Linda proceeded to get out of bed, make out with her posters of Liam Gallagher and stab a doll of Liam's wife at the time, Patsy Kensit. When she walks to the kitchen she discovers a man half-naked in her kitchen, believing she had slept with him, she smiles and walks outside looking proud of herself. In the front yard she sees Beryl and asks if she heard any noises from her flat last night. Beryl then asks if Linda had come to apologize but Linda quickly shuts her down and tells Beryl that she can't remember last night. Linda tells Beryl about the man in the flat and Beryl asks if he looks nice and menacing with a smirk, Linda remarks that she only saw him from behind. Linda then questions Beryl on why she is cutting the hedge and making so much noise, Beryl tells her that women have a very good eye for plants, leaving only her and Linda and asks when she had ever been green fingered and Linda tells her that she would rather not say. She then heads off to the shop for cigarettes. On the way a blond woman with a very noticeable cleavage comes behind Linda as they pass a construction site with all the workers cat calling the woman and Linda thinks they were cat calling her. When Linda begins checking herself out in the cold section of the shop, the same blonde woman comes up behind her and grabs milk while Linda calls her a "lesbian". Tom then comes up to Linda and attempts to make conversation but she shuts him down instantly, telling him not to talk to her in public, however, the two do begin talking and Linda tells Tom that she is considering getting a blonde streak in her hair, causing Tom to pray for mercy. She grabs her cigarettes and he grabs milk and they both make their way to the checkout counter, Linda telling him about the blonde woman who she is calling a lesbian, even running into her on the way. They also discuss the possibility that the unknown man in their flat could have slept with one of them, excited, they both rush home, Linda rushes to open the door but Tom stops her and they try to recollect what had happened the night before. They begin to fight about who the man could've slept with when Beryl tells them to go back to their beds and look for evidence, Linda rushed into her room, jumps on her bed and begins to smell the sheets only to get back up and say "Bugger". She walks out of her room to find Tom in the hall looking disappointed and the two run into the living room to look for the unknown man, only to find the place completely spotless. Tom explains that he had to be gay as no straight man would ever leave a place in such a nice condition. Linda tells Tom that he might be in the bathroom "having a dump" and the two begin laughing and rush to the bathroom door and proceed to knock, when they get no response they think that he is just shy but then begin to think that he might be deaf and when there is still no response the two barge in to find an empty bathroom.

Later, the flatmates discover that the man had left a letter initially appearing to say, "*Hi cats! Thanks for last night - PTO*". Later, Tom gets the idea that if they get drunk they will be in the same mindset they were in the night before and therefore will remember what happened an who PTO was. Beryl then comes down with plenty of alcohol in order to get wasted and the pair do just that, they then talk to Beryl about what he was like and if she could tell if he was gay or straight. She then tells them about her friend who could tell that from just hearing about the handwriting from over the phone and when Beryl begins to read out the letter, she reveals that it actually said, "*Hi cats! Thanks for last night --PTO-- I'll be back at lunch time tomorrow, see you then - Jez!*" Leaving a drunken Linda and Tom both shocked, Tom yelling at Linda for not knowning that PTO actually means "*Please turn over*". Later, Linda gets all dressed up for Jez coming at lunchtime, telling Tom that she only put on whatever fell out of her wardrobe, when they hear a knock at the door the two race to it, attempting to knock each other down in the process and open the front door to reveal, Jez. The pair bring him in and try to go along with him talking about the night before but he ultimately discovered that the two didn't remember a thing about the last night. Just when Jez was trying to explain to them, his wife, Suze, walked in leaving Linda and Tom jealous and angry that they didn't get a chance with Jez. The husband and wife reveal that they were moving into the flat below Linda and Tom, leaving the two bitter. Later that night, Linda and Tom play games resulting in him being knocked out by her.

## Personality

Linda has an extremely huge ego, always holding herself at a very high standard than those around her and believing herself to be the most beautiful and sexiest woman alive.

She is also very straight forward and will always cut to the chase in conversations.

## Trivia

* Linda is a big fan of The Spice Girls.
* Linda has a tattoo of a cross on her right hand.

## Appearances

Season 1
* "Who's That Boy"
* "The Big Break"
* "Legs and Co."
* Do They Take Sugar?"
* Saturday Night Diva"
* I Do, I Do, I Do

Season 2
* "Teacher's Pet"
* "Stiff"
* "Prison Visitor"
* "Dirty 30"
* "Glad To Be Gay?"
* "Sofa Man"

Season 3
* "Down and Out"
* "Lollopop Man"
* "Secrets and Files"
* "Trauma"
* "Singing in the Drain"
* "Decoy"

Specials
* "Millennium"