Classic Adventures of PWNage! No. 4: For Heaven's sake

## The Story

Gabriel, the last remaining Angel of the Christian Sovereignty, Touches down upon Earth for the One Hundred year anniversary of God's Death, but he has not seen the world in so long, and is confused by all the new things there are in the world.

Report after report comes in constantly of a "Massive Winged Figure" roaming the streets and local businesses alike, disrupting things and freaking people out.

The EDF is called in to investigate, and encounter Gabriel at the Block 37 mall. Gabriel senses their powerful auras, but cannot seem to identify what kind of life they are. He questions why people still worship God despite his passing, deeming it disrespectful, and that he would greatly dislike it. The Heroes try to explain that most people don't even know of his death, and that if they did, there were many things to contradict that God was the strongest being in the universe.

Gabriel is angered, and demands to know how anything could possibly disprove his father's ultimate will. Chad and Spiral both reveal that they are not of Earth, and are therefore outside of God's "plan", meaning Gabriel was either lied to, or his Dad's will only went so far. Aiden also points out that Human life was not created, but molded from cosmic super-elements, learning so from ancient Witch Tomes.

Gabriel begins to lose his mind. His father couldn't be wrong, he was the one TRUE God, and that they were heretics, liars sent by Beelzebub and Lucifer to spread misinformation of his grace. The EDF continues to bring up more evidence, such as the awesome Jett Gyro, or the History of Chad's Planet, all appearing from outside "Divine intervention".

The Angel has had enough, and a fight breaks out between them all. The heroes repeatedly try to stop the battle, but Gabriel is too furious and distraught to think.

The fight eventually dies down, Gabriel never attacking with lethal intent, as he drops to his knees in the demolished Christmas town area of the mall, weak, devastated, and beginning to sob. His halberd clangs to the ground, and he looks up into the lights, crying.

The Group surrounds him, slowly approaching so as not to tempt him once more before he looks to each of them, and begs for them to take his life. He has no purpose any longer, and everyone he loves is gone. The heroes sit next to him, each embracing him with a warm hug. Spiral tells him he knows how he feels, to have the people you love taken from you randomly, and thrust into a new reality, where *you* are the loser.

Gabriel apologizes for the havoc he has caused, doubting his Angelic nature entirely, and wishing things would end for him. The group offers him to stay at the tower for the night, and he can experience his first Christmas the next morning, free of despair, or pain. Gabriel obliges, and cleans the wreckage up slightly, before everyone leaves to go home.

At the tower, it's the dead of night, with Christmas morning approaching steadily. Spiral wakes up, and carefully steps out of bed, trying not to wake anyone. He peeks into the living room and sees, Gabriel, having a conversation with NUGG3T, the smell of baking gingerbread in the air, the fireplace on, and the floor covered with wrapping paper, and other gifts laying around.

Gabriel was researching Christmas traditions, and asking about what things each member would enjoy, conjuring them out of thin air when he was given an answer. Spiral snickered to himself, and thought for a moment, before checking his wallet, and dashing out of the building.

The next morning, Gabriel awoke the rest of the group, with NUGG3T outside, saying he was ready to go. The group waited outside for Aiden's van, and they left to Love Avenue.

They all began to open presents at Ejay's house, all of Gabriel's presents being adored by those he gave them to. For the first time, Gabriel felt warm, and loved again. Spiral tapped him on the shoulder, and Gabriel turned to everyone, claiming they had a special gift, just for him. Spiral handed him a small box, and inside was a Crucifix Necklace, made from pure Maroonan Gold.

Gabriel put it on, and began to cry once more, but this time, the tears were of delight, glowing a beautiful silver.

\*After Credits Page\*

A girl with white hair comes into her office late at night, to discover a man in a purple suit looking at her files on her desk.

"Hey Beebz. What's up?"

"Nothing, I was simply checking out the new office."

The girl excitedly babbles about how awesome it is, but stops, asking if he's okay.

"Oh yes, apologies, nothing is wrong." He looks down at a photo, the shadow over his eyes giving way to the glow of but one.

The view reveals he is looking at a picture of Gabriel at the mall next to Santa.

"Nothing at all."

## Trivia

* Gabriel is the first friend of the EDF that does not become a member, instead becoming more of a Nomad, traveling across Earth.