Episode 78: Raygunomics

**Video:**
1:00:50

**Video:**
raygunomics.mp4

https://globehell.libsyn.com/

## Episode Summary

There are many homes that are empty that people could live in.  Why not let the unhoused live there? But what if that meant you couldn't  have a second or third vacation home? Is it worth it? Maybe there is a  better option to shrink all issue and nothing about it will be sexual.

## Idea Details

* Idea: Shrinking Homelessness, Raygunomics
* Creator of idea: Drew
* Purpose of idea: You want my idea right now? Well, let me talk about -- a little bit about what's goin' on right now, Josiah. If you haven't been paying attention. I know you were in Calgary -- (Josiah: "Yeah, you're jacking off right now is what's going on.") No. You were in Calgary last week. Of course, weather is extremely cold -- (Josiah: "You're trying to time your nut for the end of the episode.") It's currently -24 in Calgary. We had one day of um -- Yeah, this is not just Alberta, this is also B.C. Not as cold as in Alberta but uh -- (Josiah: "So your point is that it's cold in winter. OK.") No, what -- here's my -- (Josiah: "So you're saying global warming is fake.") No, I'm saying that it's -- No, I'm saying -- (Josiah: "I mean, is global warming fake? It's definitely fake.") Global warming, first of all, it is -- it's real. (Josiah: "Real fake.") It's real bad. What I'm saying, Josiah, is that it's very cold outside. And there are so many empty houses, empty properties, empty places. (Josiah: "Empty promises.") Places -- and these are places that could be housing people um that uh the unhoused can go to, possibly. We also have, currently, a lot of empty buildings down in uh downtown Calgary. Business uh -- Businesses that are no longer uh open. Um -- (Josiah: "Wisk? I tried to visit Wisk and it's gone!") Mhm. But also a lot of office space that could be converted. This report says almost 70,000 houses are empty in Vancouver. So the number of vacant houses at are -- are at an all-time high. So that is space that could theoretically be used to house the unhoused. (Josiah: "And they just know that from -- cause every house has uh the bathroom lock on the front door where it says 'Occupied' or 'Vacant', and they just go check and people have flipped the s--") Right. Well it's not quite like that. It's a little more complicated than that. (Josiah: "Well I think they *should* make it that --") They phone them up -- they phone them, like, five times a day for, like, a week, and if nobody picks up then they say, 'Mark that down as a vacant house.' (Josiah: "And then they go install the bathroom lock on it.") They don't -- there's no bathroom locks! OK? (Josiah: "And probably the --") What I'm saying, Josiah, is there are all these places. But then, OK, you think about it: yes, we could convert this space or open these houses up, but um these could be vacation homes for people, these could be second homes for people, and we -- do we really wanna say that, you know, maybe, uh you know, you're gonna lose this vacation property? Because I've invested heavily in a number of vacation properties, I have four or five -- (Josiah: "You have?") Yeah. (Josiah: "Where are they?") Um, well I'm not gonna give away *all* the locations. I do have a Vancouver one, I do have one in Montréal uh Quebec um that I go to. Um so -- (Josiah: "Reall-- so you're coming to the city I live in and not telling me.") Well it's just -- I go for a vacation and, you know, I feel like if I went and told you you were there, you would be like -- (Josiah: "Cause you *begged* me. You *begged* me -- you *begged* me to come over to your house when I was in Calgary! You were *begging* me to come in there and help clean up.") I feel like if I came down to Montreal, you would be like, uh, you would be, you'd be like, 'Oh, we gotta record! We gotta record! We gotta record!' And when I'm just down there, I'm just down there to chill. So, we have this predicament, OK? We want to house people, but we don't wanna give up our vacation properties, our second homes, maybe we have uh a place -- uh maybe we're uh renting out a place, um so we don't wanna lose those properties. Uh, so what do we do? (Josiah: "Um.") Do you have any guesses? (Josiah: "Uhhh we want to make sure that people can live in our empty homes, buu--") No. No, Josiah. If -- cause if they did that, what if that's our vacation property? (Josiah: "Right. So I think probably I'm guessing uh we let people sleep head-to-foot with us in our beds?") No. (Josiah: "In our own beds? We let strangers come sleep in our um --") Josiah, I want -- (Josiah: "We 69 them?") No, we're not gonna 69 them. We might 69 them. But we need to Shrink Homelessness. And I mean that literally. What if we had the ability to take every unhoused person on the planet and shrink them much smaller so that maybe they were only inches tall, and then we could open up a single tiny, like, apartment building? Does this make sense to you?
* Timetable: No timetable was given for Shrinking Homelessness, aka Raygunomics. It requires the shrinking technology to be invented, which it already is, so it should be implemented very soon.
* Idea details:
	+ Shrinking Homelessness will involve every unhoused person on the planet being shrunk much smaller so that they are only inches tall. Then we will open up a single tiny apartment building for all of them.
	+ Shrinking Homelessness may involve fetish things with small men and large women.
	+ More than just unhoused people will be shrunken down; it could be anyone who is having trouble affording a home, who could be put into a dollhouse or something similar.
	+ All the shrunken unhoused people on Earth don't necessarily need to live in a shelter, as per Drew's original idea; they could live somewhere like a Malibu Barbie mansion.
	+ It wouldn't make sense to simply shrink everyone on Earth because then there would be no point to owning as many as 107 properties, like Drew does.
	+ The shrinking process probably cannot be reversed.
	+ As many people will be shrunk as need housing. This includes if everyone on Earth needs housing.
	+ Josiah will get shrunk.
	+ This idea is leftist.
	+ This idea is not erotic, although if someone finds it erotic then that's fine.
	+ Not everyone will be allowed to be shrunken, even millionaires and billionaires despite how much we might want that. But as soon as someone accrues one billion, their head pops off.
	+ People can opt out of being shrunken by simply saying they don't want to be shrunken.
	+ It will be difficult for a small man to impregnate a regular sized woman because his sperm are going to be so small. This could be remedied by having him go inside the woman up to the egg and either directly implant his sperm into the egg, or take the egg out and beat off onto it, either by himself or with a group of other guys of a mixed size variety. If a team of shrunken people go in a submarine up to the egg, they will be called the Swim Team. If the jacking off route is chosen instead, though, then the guy who finishes last has to eat the egg.
	+ The prison crisis will be solved by simply shrinking down all the prisoners a million times so you don't have to worry about them anymore. Then they will be the size of dust and will be unable to murder anyone anymore.

## Devil Play

* Josiah played devil by pointing out that unhoused people often feel very othered and marginalized by the rest of society, so he clarified that Drew's idea was to shrink those people and make them less human.
	+ Drew agreed though didn't feel it was about making them less human, but that it was just about size. He went on to say that he got where Josiah was coming from but felt that Shrinking Homelessness was something that could be done with dignity. He gave an example of someone in a suit in a commercial who was mini sized and may have once experienced homelessness and then found a beautiful woman to marry, which means that there is dignity in shrinking all the unhoused people in the world to fit inside of one tiny apartment building. He gave another example of a mini boyfriend to further illustrate his point.
	+ Josiah realized from Drew's two examples so far that this was some kind of a fetish thing.
* Josiah compared Drew's idea of Shrinking Homelessness to eugenics.
	+ Drew said it is not eugenics because they are living; it's shrinking them down. He went on to say that it wouldn't just be people experiencing homelessness who would be shrunken down, it would be anyone who is having trouble affording a home, who could be shrunken down so they can buy a dollhouse or something.
	+ Josiah asked why Drew wants to shrink unhoused people down but still stick them in a shelter instead of a Malibu Barbie mansion or something like that.
	+ Drew said they could do something like that.
	+ Josiah elaborated that Drew's first thought was to shrink down all the unhoused people in the world and basically stick them in a can.
	+ Drew pointed out that he didn't say that.
	+ Josiah agreed with the semantics that Drew didn't *say* it, he merely suggested it.
	+ Drew repeated that he didn't say it.
	+ Josiah asked why they don't just shrink everyone then.
	+ Drew asked what good a vacation home would be if you were shrunk and could no longer reach it.
	+ Josiah then came to the realization that Drew wanted to rent out the vacation home
	+ Drew clarified that he wants to use it.
	+ Josiah suggested that if everyone got shrunk down then we could keep all of the homes.
		- Note: Presumably "all of the homes" that Josiah referred to are Invincible Houses, since every preexisting house in the world was demolished as part of the implementation of that idea.
	+ Drew agreed but posited that everybody would be too small then, and so asked what would you do with them.
	+ Josiah suggested a scenario where everyone's net worth was tied to their size, and therefore instead of owning more property, you simply get to take up more space based on how much your net worth is and then your net worth determines the size that you were and then you get shrunk to that size and then as you develop more capital, you grow a little bit.
	+ Drew agreed that would be a good idea, but pointed out that part of the issue is that they can obviously shrink people but wasn't sure if they could make them larger.
		- Note: This is a bizarre thing for Drew to say because his own idea in Episode 48: World Wide Weed involved mega-sizing a man so he could build a giant van around the Earth so he could hotbox Earth in the giant van.
	+ Josiah asked to clarify, based on Drew's remark, that they actually can shrink people.
	+ Drew pointed out that they can.
* Josiah pointed out that Drew was doing 'Raygun-omics' this week by suggesting his idea of Shrinking Homelessness. He asked why they don't instead simply provide unhoused people with what they need, such as money.
	+ Drew said his idea of Shrinking Homelessness wasn't a perfect solution, but one has to think about what is most important: housing everyone or having vacation homes and second properties, third properties, four properties, five properties, six properties, seventh, eight properties, nine, 10 properties, 11 properties, 12 properties, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20 properties, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 58, 59, 60, 61, 62, 63, 64, 65, 68, 67, 68, 69, 70, 71, 72, 73, 74, 75, 76, 77, 78, 79, 80, 81, 82, 83, 84, 85, 86, 87, 88, 89, 90, 91, 92, 93, 94, 95, 96, 97, 98, 99, 100, 101, 102, 103, 104, 105, 106, 107.
	+ Josiah asked to clarify that Drew was talking about properties.
	+ Drew confirmed that to be true.
	+ Josiah, incredulous at this assertion, sought to clarify further that Drew was describing the number of properties that he would like to own.
	+ Drew confirmed this as well, saying he would love to own that many properties.
	+ Josiah asked why, if Drew owned that many properties, he wouldn't simply share them with other people.
	+ Drew did not seem to understand this line of questioning, because if he were to share the properties then he asked why he would even own them in the first place.
		- Note: See Episode 9: World Wide Landlord for more information on being a landlord.
	+ Josiah implored him to think of how many properties Drew could own if he, too, were shrunken and the property was merely a thimble. He reiterated his previous position with the concluding thoughts that equality would solve even more problems if everyone was shrunk.
	+ Drew moved on to talking about a quarter being shrunk to the size of a dime.
	+ Josiah confirmed that a quarter could perhaps be shrunk to the size of a dime, but it looks like shit. He brought up his concern that what Drew really wanted to do with his idea is zap all the unhoused people in the world.
	+ Drew stated that he was not trying to zap anyone.
	+ Josiah expressed his feeling that Shrinking Homelessness was probably the most dangerously fascist idea Drew has ever had.
	+ Drew laughed at Shrinking Homelessness being the most dangerously fascist idea he's ever had. He then played a comedy skit about a shrinking raygun and, after a while, stated that he took issue with the criticism he received about his idea being dangerously fascist since he was trying to house everyone on the planet.
	+ Josiah asked what is the worth of a vacation home if this is the cost. He noted that the scarcity is what drives up the appeal of having 107 vacation homes. He asserted that Drew would feel as empty as his homes do, in pursuing this idea.
	+ Drew agreed but stated that he would at least own the homes - they would be his and nobody else would be able to go inside.
	+ Josiah let Drew know his sincere belief of what Drew was trying to do, which was not fascist, but rather, under the guise of providing housing for others, Drew was trying to normalize the idea of shrinking rays in order to blame it on that when someone sees his tiny little nub of a pecker, so Drew can say that he was working on solving the housing crisis and he was jerking off while he was doing it and he accidentally shrunk his pecker.
	+ Drew denied this claim and asserted that if his pecker got shot with a shrinking ray, or even a disintegration ray or a freezing ray, then the effect of the ray would be on the entire body, not just the pecker.
	+ Josiah noted in response to this that Drew could no longer use that alibi in defense of his dangerously fascist idea. After watching more of a comedy skit Drew showed him, he reiterated his concern that Drew was only pursuing this idea so he could tower over someone whose life was filled with hardship and threaten to stomp them, in which case Josiah would have to shoot Drew with a shrink ray to stop him from resorting to that violence he craves.
	+ Drew confirmed that he would never stomp them, but would rather put them carefully in the palm of his hand and carry them over to their new miniature mansion.
* Josiah asked if the shrinking process can be reversed.
	+ Drew replied that he didn't think so.

## Notable Events

* Josiah revealed that his new sign-on for 2022 would be to do belches at the start of every show. This would keep the show fresh in the new year. Drew declined to have a new thing, opting instead to remain as simply the same old Drew because it's worked out so far for him, in his opinion, though he admitted it hadn't actually worked out so far for him and had in fact been miserable.
* Josiah and Drew mistakenly referred to this episode as "Globe Hell 79", when it is in fact "Globe Hell 78".
* Josiah revealed that Drew has an antagonistic and aggressive lack of enthusiasm for continuing to make the show with him behind the scenes because he would always text things like "yup" or "sure" in response to Josiah's texts. Drew revealed that he texts everyone like that, including his own father.
* Josiah and Drew discussed potentially having Drew's father be a featured guest on every episode of the show in 2022.
* Josiah sought to teach Drew how to have a little bit more charisma. To do so, they watched a video called "5 Tips to Instantly Be More Charismatic!" about how if you want to be more charismatic and charming in everyday life, it can be a serious challenge, especially if you don’t normally think of yourself as being a charismatic person.
* Josiah and Drew discussed their meals at Friends Cafe and complained about how bad the food was. Drew repeated his position from the end of that Cameo episode that they should have gotten ginger beef from the Chinese restaurant across the street.
* Josiah and Drew discussed a possible future idea about how you can travel back in time to get a different meal for lunch if you didn't like what you ordered or got the wrong lunch.
* Drew asked listeners to tell them which host they think is more charismatic.
* Josiah and Drew discussed a possible future idea about how you can go back inside your mom's vagina so her vagina can crush your head if it's too big.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Western Canada grapples with extreme cold" about how a year of extreme weather is ending with dangerously cold temperatures across most of the west.
* Josiah and Drew discussed Fahrenheit and if it's German.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "B.C.'s South Coast braces for snow, record-breaking cold" about how residents of B.C.'s South Coast are bracing for snow and record-breaking cold over the Christmas holiday weekend.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Almost 70,000 houses are empty in Vancouver" about how if you are a wealthy Chinese (or just have lots of money and are looking to invest); for the past decade, Canada's housing market has provided an amazing place for you to park your money.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Frito Lay Singles 3" about how finally the differently sized couple get some therapy.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Mini Boyfriend episode 1" about an average sized girl with an average sized heart.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "WHAT IS THIS?!?!" about a woman holding a tiny naked small man in her hand and rubbing his genitals.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "The Amazing Quarter Shrinking Machine!" about how a MagLab physicist and engineer pair up to demonstrate the lab's famous Quarter Shrinking Machine, a loud, stinky illustration of electrodynamics, circuits, Lenz’s Law and Lorenz forces.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "The Shrinking Machine | Anwar Jibawi & Rudy Mancuso" about one of the SNL Digital Shorts.
* Josiah and Drew rewatched "WHAT IS THIS?!?!".
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Mini Boyfriend episode 3".
* Josiah and Drew briefly watched a video called "Downsizing (2017) - A Little Advice Scene (1/10) | Movieclips" about how Dave (Jason Sudeikis) gives Paul (Matt Damon) advice.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Two Words: Rooster; Dependency" about a mediumly shrunken man being cuddled by a giantess.
* Josiah and Drew continued watching "Downsizing (2017) - A Little Advice Scene (1/10) | Movieclips".
* Josiah and Drew rewatched "WHAT IS THIS?!?!".
* Josiah and Drew rewatched "Mini Boyfriend episode 1".

## Notable Quotes

### Josiah

* "What if his name was Innate Ruess?"
* "We gotta try to find the CLT. Find the CLT. If you can find the CLT, then you could uh b-- become more charisma. Charisma."
* [In response to Drew accusing him of being Karen-matic] "You know what? I'll say this: asking to talk to the manager actually takes a lot of confidence and charisma. That's a brave thing to do. It's brave!"
* [On the topic of his being Karen-matic when they went to Friends Cafe] "Well, the coffee was terrible and I didn't complain at all. And I thought the sandwich was disgusting."
* "Drew said his favorite band is uh Skrewdriver."
* [On the topic of his large head] "I always wondered if it was because I was a Cesarean section and my head wasn't crushed by my mom's vagina when I was born."
* "It's so cold they got a fireman out! That's a good idea. You need a iceman!"
* "What kind of person is -- is it like a virus person?"
* [On the topic of Drew's vacation home in Montréal] "Reall-- so you're coming to the city I live in and not telling me. Cause you *begged* me. You *begged* me -- you *begged* me to come over to your house when I was in Calgary! You were *begging* me to come in there and help clean up."
* "So I think probably I'm guessing uh we let people sleep head-to-foot with us in our beds? In our own beds? We let strangers come sleep in our um -- We 69 them?"
* "That guy is shrunk inside of his jacket!"
* "So this is just the sa-- this is just um *Honey, I Shrunk the Kids*, really."
* "I would say that this is your most uh 'Raygun'-- I think you're doing 'Raygun-omics' this week by suggesting that. I mean, why not just, like, provide unhoused people with what they n-- with maybe money or..."
* "Again, I think the real debate is the same thing: equality would solve even more problems; if everyone was shrunk."
* [On the topic of Drew's idea, Shrinking Homelessness] "This is what I sincerely think is what you're trying to do. And I think it's not fascist, what you're trying to do. I think that, under the guise of providing housing for others, you're trying to normalize the idea of shrinking rays in order to blame it on that when someone sees your tiny little nub of a pecker. And you'll just say, 'Oh, well I was working on solving the housing crisis and I accidentally -- I was jerking off while I was doing it.' "

### Drew

* "With great power comes great responsibility."
* "I think I'm very charismatic, actually. And I think the listeners would agree."
* "Find the clit."
* "Well I know where *that* is. Mhm. It's inside the pussy."
* "Hey, if you're so charismatic, how come I never listen to you and you're so boring?"
* "More Karen-matic. You're Kar-- You're *very* Karen-matic. Can I talk to the manager, please?"
* [In response to Josiah saying it's brave to be a Karen] "When we went to uh Friends, Josiah asked for the manager because his coffee wasn't good."
* "Duck my winkie."
* [On the topic of a future episode of the show about going back inside your mom's vagina so her vagina can crush your head if it's too big] "Go back inside. It's all about going back. That's the real Back to Basics."
* [On the topic of all the empty houses in the world] "But then, OK, you think about it: yes, we could convert this space or open these houses up, but um these could be vacation homes for people, these could be second homes for people, and we -- do we really wanna say that, you know, maybe, uh you know, you're gonna lose this vacation property? Because I've invested heavily in a number of vacation properties, I have four or five --"
* "I feel like if I came down to Montreal, you would be like, uh, you would be, you'd be like, 'Oh, we gotta record! We gotta record! We gotta record!' And when I'm just down there, I'm just down there to chill."
* "No, we're not gonna 69 them. We might 69 them."
* "But we need to Shrink Homelessness. And I mean that literally. What if we had the ability to take every unhoused person on the planet and shrink them much smaller so that maybe they were only inches tall, and then we could open up a single tiny, like, apartment building? Does this make sense to you?"
* "This is not a fetish thing, this is not a fetish thing, Josiah, this is not a fetish thing."
* [In response to criticism of his idea Shrinking Homelessness that it is eugenics] "It's not eugenics. They are living. It's shrinking them down is what it really is."
* [On the topic of whether his idea of Shrinking Homelessness is basically just *Honey, I Shrunk the Kids*] "A little bit! I mean, it's not like a raygun."
* "What is more important: housing everyone or having these vacation homes and second properties, third properties, four properties, five properties, six properties, seventh, eight properties, nine, 10 properties, 11 properties, 12 properties, *13*, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20 properties, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, *37*, *38*, *39*, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, *56*, 57, 58, 59, 60, 61, 62, 63, 64, 65, 68, 67, 68, yes 69 - don't say anything, wiseguy - 70, 71, 72, 73, 74, 75, 76, 77, 78, 79, 80, 81, 82, 83, 84, 85, 86, 87, 88, 89, 90, 91, 92, 93, 94, 95, 96, 97, 98, 99, 100, 101, 102, 103, 104, 105, 106, 107!"
* "I accidentally shrunk my pecker. I shrunk -- I was trying to solve the housing crisis and I shrunk my pecker."
* "This is not porno; this is art. If you don't understand art then I don't know what to tell you."
* "You think this is sexy?? You would jerk off to this??"
* "Millionaires should be allowed to exist. Millionaires should be allowed to exist, Josiah. Millionaires should be allowed to exist. Multi-millionaires. But as soon as you hit one billion, your head pops off."
* "I'm just saying: here's an idea; take it or leave it, OK?? World Wide Train; take it or leave it. Shrink Homelessness; take it or leave it."
* "Something just popped into my head: if we want to abolish prison, you can just shrink people down so small you can't even see them at the -- and not even worry about 'em."
* "It's a very big -- a very different thing to talk about shrinking down someone *once*, versus shrinking down someone a million times. Say some-- a k-- somebody's a killer. We abolish prisons, we don't want this serial killer out on the streets. We're gonna shrink them a million times so that they're so small, if they -- they *can't* kill anything! They're the size of a dust -- a piece of dust!"

## Trivia

* This is Drew's second idea about reducing homelessness, after Episode 74: Invincible House, which involved an idea to create houses that are not contributing negatively to climate change and are also able to withstand whatever climate change has in store for us.
	+ Note: Episode 74: Invincible House also involved getting rid of all the current houses in the world so we can start over with all Invincible Houses. Presumably the many vacant houses Drew referenced throughout this episode are vacant Invincible Houses, though this has yet to be confirmed.
* This is Drew's second idea about drastically changing the size of someone, after Episode 48: World Wide Weed, which involved mega-sizing someone so that building the giant van around the Earth will be similar to building a regular size van.
	+ Note: Drew seems to have forgotten about the technology to mega-size the man who builds the giant van around the Earth, based on some of his comments in this episode.
* This is Drew's second idea that largely revolves around property ownership, after Episode 9: World Wide Landlord.
* This is the third episode idea that involves discussion of sexual activities performed on an egg inside the body, after Episode 33: Back to Basics and Episode 69: Swarm Army.
* This is the second episode idea that involves the danger of something tiny being able to hurt or kill someone via the brain, after Episode 69: Swarm Army.
* The episode title refers to 'Raygunomics', while the in-episode idea title at the bottom of the screen refers to 'Shrinking Homelessness' for the entirety of the episode.
	+ Note: It is unclear why the episode was not named 'Episode 78: Shrinking Homelessness', in line with the in-episode idea title at the bottom of the screen, but after Josiah pointed out that what Drew was really doing with this idea could be called 'Raygunomics' (perhaps a play on the term 'Reaganomics'), it is likely that Josiah and Drew had a change of heart regarding the idea name and the episode itself, thereby renaming it 'Episode 78: Raygunomics'. However, this is merely conjecture.