Band Geeks

"**Band Geeks**" is a *Maggie Muffin* episode from season 2. In this episode, Helen creates a band to perform at the Disc Bowl.

## Characters

* Helen Luggins
* Helena Luggers (debut)
* Helena's band (mentioned)
* Johnny Uzumaki
* Eddie Babyman
* Fish who passes by Eddie
* Mr. Banks
* Florence Owl
* Nine
* Music Rental clerk (mentioned)
* Sanjay Owl
* Maggie Muffin
* Kira Moonhead
* English Narrator
* Fireman (mentioned)
* Paramedic (mentioned as "some guy in an ambulance")
* Human audience (debut)
* Owner of the white sedan (mentioned)

## Synopsis

The episode begins one day, Helen was playing his clarinet but was disturbed by a doorbell which is a doctor who arrived at his house after mistaking her vilolin playing for a "dying animal," he receives a call from his former high school classmate and rival Helena Luggers. The rich, successful, and very smug Helena informs Helen that he is the leader of a band that is supposed to play the prestigious Bubble Bowl the following week, but he will be unable to attend. He gives Helen a backhanded offer to replace him, correctly suspecting that Helen does not have his own band. However, Helen defiantly insists that he does have a band and accepts the offer, before posting flyers around Dice Bottom looking for people to join his band.

On the first night of rehearsals, Helen brings his rented instruments to a practice hall filled with townspeople. Upon discovering that none of his prospective bandmates have any previous musical experience, Helen teaches them the basics. Unfortunately, the night doesn't end well as Helen gets pinned to the wall by drumsticks the players mistook as mouth instruments while Sandy beats up Patrick and shoves his body through the bore of a trombone after he kicks her leg.

Things do not get any better during the second day of training; while practicing a march through the street two flag twirlers are killed when they spin their flags too fast, causing them to fly into the air and crash into a passing blimp. On the third day, Helen checks on Plankton's harmonica solo, though he becomes exhausted and collapses from running back and forth between the holes since the harmonica is much bigger than him.

On the fourth and final day of practice, Helen says that while none of them have made any improvement since the beginning, he suggests that everyone play loud so they will be good. Unfortunately, they take this theory a bit too literally as they play so loud and badly that the windows of the practice hall break, and Helen's face is deformed beyond recognition, prompting him to change the plan to playing extremely quietly so nobody will hear them. The band members then begin to insult each other, and despite Helen attempting to quell the rising tensions, a mass brawl breaks out that damages most of the instruments. When the clock hits 10:00 PM, the fighting ends and everyone starts to head home.

Helen stops them at the entrance and expresses his disappointment at their lack of progress and for not taking his dream seriously. After Helen leaves in distress at his failure, a remorseful SpongeBob asks the townspeople to think about all of the times Helen came through for them. Despite drawing a blank, they are convinced enough to give practice one more tries for Helen's sake, with SpongeBob taking command as the conductor.

The day of the performance arrives, and Helen prepares to finalize his band's cancellation, only to find Helena waiting for him at the entrance of the Disc Bowl. Helen tries to explain that his band can no longer play as they all died in a marching accident, but they suddenly appear behind him in full uniform and with their instruments at ready, forcing Helen to go through with the performance.

As everyone enters a huge glass dome, Helen bemoans the humiliation that he is certain is awaiting him. The dome rises into a football stadium filled with human fans. Helen, still fearing that the performance will be a disaster, nervously begins conducting. But to his and Helena's astonishment, the band performs a rock ballad called "Sweet Victory" by David Glen Eisley and it turns out to be a tremendous success! As the crowd sways in awe and Helena faints in shock while going to the hospital.

To end the episode, Helen throws away his baton and leaps into the air in triumph.