A Sanctuary Picnic

Characters in this scene: Lady Lim, Condor, Justin

Location: Sanctuary

It's not everyday there's a picnic in Sanctuary. Lady relished the opportunity.

Three large, very fine blankets laid across the dirt ground - probably too expensive to really be used in this context. A large picnic basket was opened with a few little bento boxes already set out.

Little chicken curry salad sandwiches, some with crusts and others crustless. Salads with dry, crumbly noodles and tangy, orange-honey dressing. Smoked salmon-avocado sushi. Miso and Egg Drop Soups. Peanut brittle, coconut cream on sticky rice, and mochi for dessert options. Thermoses filled with tea, hot chocolate, chai, and coffee.

Beside the spread lay a basket full of indigo lotus flowers. Sanctuary's leftover power trickled into these plants. A flower was only worth about a drop of blood's worth of Power and couldn't keep for more than a month, but all together they would make a decent offering for their one companion who couldn't eat regularly.

*Did I go a little overboard?* Lady wondered, only briefly before smiling at both Justin and Condor. "I don't prepare food often myself, but since the Alabaster is still deciding the fate of Sanctuary I figured I'd let a little of Christine out. I didn't *just* prepare for Sanctuary's Grand Opening these last ten years, stuck around here so I...uh, had a lot of chances to cook." She explains, blushing a little.

The two days of rest and hearing about Oliver's fate really made her seem much more vibrant and rested than the two of them had ever seen her.

Condor looks at Lady a little incredulously, unable to imagine how someone could possibly be *embarrassed* about making such delicious food. They look at their environment, a stark contrast to the well-presented picnic spread.

The sky is a glitching nebula of cosmic hues. The blankets have been laid on the one patch of ground not marred by vehicle tracks. Around them, mounds of scrap are piled high with dented rusty metal. Condor sits with their back against a stack of tires. Girders stick out of the ground at odd angles like the half-buried ribcage of some mechanical colossus.

"Oh, before I forget."

Lady grabs a small brown bag out of the picnic basket and passes it to Condor. On inspection, it's chicken bones (likely leftover from the sandwiches).

Justin could be self-conscious, but he doesn't care anymore. If Condor and Christine aren't his allies, then nobody is.

"So - it isn't something I love talking about, but the truth is that I'm the son of the Liang family. You may have heard of them. New England binders. My mother was... good about a few things, and gender equality is one. So my sisters and I are functionally the same age, but they are back with her and I'm here. I successfully argued to pursue a Master's, if only to get away from her. So not only am I here, but I'm *over-educated*." He sighs, looking down.

"All three of them are Binders. The only reason I learned anything at all about Wards is - they need *a* Warden to watch their backs and perform my ritual, support my Guardians, keep the prisoners safe, fend off any rivals or friends of the prisoner. They need a sibling guaranteed to be a supporter, to not have children."

"That's what it boils down to. My Guardians aren't my supporters." He looks furious as he speaks, gesturing in the way of a practiced public speaker. "They're jailers for the prisoners I keep. And I'm the ultimate warden, not in the Practice sense but in the keeping-prisoners-kept sense."

Justin puts his head in his hands.

"This isn't what I wanted or what I believe in. And I guess that's why I'm here. Mother let me go to college, and I learned what I thought was another way."

Condor swallows. "Oh. I... my aunt has mentioned them a few times, I think. This explains a lot. But um, I don't think it - no, no hedging here. It *doesn't* change how I see you in any way that I find meaningful. Except possibly that now I admire your bravery even more."

They gesture with an arm, an offer of a one-armed hug.

And then, a few seconds later, they make the connection to what happened back in the Philippines. Their arm falls.

"Oh shit, wait, but your family - what do they think of you now? Are you in danger?"

"Not at the moment." Lady answers Condor instead of Justin. She turns to the young Asian man, takes a sip of tea and then admits, "I already knew of your heritage, of course - as you most likely guessed. Your family has a bit of renown and I do a lot of research on all my employees, long term guests, and..."

"And friends." She says, after a moment, as if tasting the word.

She pauses again, this time looking very serious, her attention on Justin more than Condor. "I'm afraid you may not think of me as a very good friend after what I'm about to say. Your mother called last week, wondering where you were. She tracked you down...it had started with the picture you all took with," she gestured at the arena around him "Your first encounter with Bob. That selfie."

"I let her talk mostly, she's a very, very smart and dangerous woman. We had just returned from the Philippines...you were still...after the binding and the revelations with Tiyo's Eye...I made a judgement call."

Lady takes in a breath, even though Justin likely has already put the facts together, "With Sanctuary's Grand Opening coming right up, I was hoping the work would help you focus and give you time to emotionally and mentally recover. I didn't tell your mother anything about you - at all - I told her I respected your privacy. But I *didn't* tell you about the call, of course until just now."

Justin returns Condor's hug with one arm, squeezing ever-so-slightly more than he knows he's permitted. "I don't know about danger, but -" He stops talking to cede room to Christine, then starts to frown, then curl into himself.

"She is." He remains still, arms crossed, curled over. "Okay. What did she want? What did... she say?"

"Everything you likely expect. How are you doing? Are you handling independence alright? When will you...she didn't say it, but the tone clearly implied 'realize your folly' - and come home." Lady says, solemn.

He frowns, looking at the ground. "What do you think? I'm thankful to be able to be here, but - My wards weren't enough to help Oliver. They didn't protect that bastard LeGrand."

"Justin, that's -" Condor frowns, regretting that they'd stepped out a few minutes before the LeGrand drama. "Okay, actually, wait. You did great there, but that's, like, beside the point, I think? I feel like you're fixating on the stuff you just said you were trying to step away from."

They meet Jusin's eyes. "And I'm pretty sure I get it! Believe me, like, I know I've told you a lot about how bad my aunt was for me and how much better my life has been since I cut her out of it, but like, that's just wishful thinking a lot of the time. She's still with me in a sense, making me feel bad about doing things she wouldn't approve of. When I beat myself up about that stuff, I feel like she's speaking through me. And when *you* beat yourself up about not being a good enough Warden... I dunno. It feels similar. It makes me sad that you're not focusing on how good a friend you are, all the ways you've helped people even in the short time I've known you."

Justin meets Condor's eyes, but isn't able to maintain the gaze. "I know that my mom is still with me. I know. Even if I know I'm not a good Warden." He pauses, takes a deep breath, and looks at his hands, fingers and knuckles stained black.

"But... you're right. Condor, I care about you more than I've cared about most people, and part of it is fear that you'll be taken away. I know that Mother wouldn't approve of you, and I don't care. She can have my sister as an heir, damn her. I want to help people, and I want to help people *with you*."

Condor is taken aback, swallowing hard. They take a few seconds to respond. "Thank you, Justin," they say softly, "I didn't realize how much I wanted to hear that. I - I feel the same way. It's been amazing so far, and I... I want that to keep going. And if your family gets in the way of that... well, they tried once. Let's hope they learned."

Justin doesn't know what to say, but he knows he *has* to say *something*. "Condor, I... my family is persistent, but they're limited. And I don't remember ever, ever taking about someone like you to them. So I don't care what they say."

He grins. His smile is sad, but a bit gleeful as well. "They want me back, *not* forsworn. So I'll say it now. Condor, if I ever get drawn back to my family, I swear that you and Christine will still be my friends. We may not agree on everything, and that's okay. Friendship is bigger and stronger than that. I wish I had been able to protect you, but I know you don't need me to give you strength."

Condor's eyes widen. They start to say something, then press their lips together hard instead, struggling to find words.

Lady had been silent, giving space for Condor and Justin to speak to one another. This had been long overdue since their Journey.

She noticed there was more open space around the blankets she sat on than there were by Condor and Justin, but this was nothing new. Still, after so many years there was a pain in her heart. She took a deep breath, letting the two speak but hugging herself internally, knowing she deserved as much compassion as she desired to give to others.

At Justin's oath though, she felt she had to speak up. She looked first to Condor making sure she wouldn't interrupt them, and noticed them struggling to speak...perhaps for the best for now. Oaths were never to be taken lightly and yet the young so often did.

"I am so appreciative of the openness of your heart right now, Justin. Your emotions and being and Self are truly a gift...but as much as I believe in your words now, I unfortunately know from experience that there's a reason why you limited yourself to the word 'friendship' just now when you could have easily made a different, slightly more binding declaration....which I am glad you didn't, by the way."

"I believe even now, you are still hedging, a foot in both worlds. I can only speak confidently because I see a kindred spirit in you..."

"...enough to see you as a friend, and enough to break some of my ethics. The reason I didn't tell you about your mother's call is simple - I didn't want you act rashly. You are the exact same age I was when...my actions led to the murder of every single one of my family members. I did not get a chance to say goodbye to my mother, or father, and only to a handful of my siblings - who simply did not understand what was going on."

"That's the world we live in...and on some level, I think you understand that."

Justin looks down. He doesn't have anything to say, and when he does speak up, his voice is raw. "I'm sorry, Christine." He pauses for more than a moment. Long enough for it to start to be uncomfortable before he finally speaks. "What would you have done differently? If you were - me, or you. Or anyone."

"This isn't a fair conversation for you Justin. Of course I have thought about this very question for the last ten years...but none of my answers will be your answers. As much as we are similar, your situation is unique and different and only you know the metaphorical, 'lay of the land.' All I ask is that you make your next moves regarding with your family with consciousness and conscientiousness...and not with the reckless abandon you are...lovingly - I will mention first - currently exhibiting."

"Your emotions are true, as are your friendship, and love. Your actions have shown as much. You do not have to make a binding declaration to prove that."

Justin's head hangs. "I know. I know. But -" He stops speaking as she continues. "I do not need it to prove my conviction, but I can use it to protect us. You've said my mother has contacted you? I can swear to not disclose what we've spoken of, and tell her of the oath." He looks her in the eye, setting his jaw. "I may not swear to keep secret anything you've already told her. But I owe enough to you that I worry I can never repay it. I know they want me back, not foresworn, and so I believe they will not press oaths I have made. The declarations are meant to be security, not a way to threaten me, but if you use them or me as leverage..." he sighs, "now is the time to use it against my mother, while I am in your hands."

He looks at Condor, face softening. Justin looks unsure. "Are you all right? I... I know I swore that, but it doesn't say... how close of friends we are. I didn't want to define that."

Condor's voice cracks a little, responding. "Justin.\* Fuck. How are you so...... look, I'm not going to swear anything. But I can say, truthfully, that you have been so, so good for me, and that I don't want to lose that. The opposite, in fact. I want to..." They swallow, throat suddenly dry. "I want to explore it more. I want to keep growing closer. There might be a limit out there; there probably *should* be a limit, but we haven't hit it yet, for me. Not nearly. I don't want to define how close of friends we are either. I want to discover it."

He doesn't know what to say. He doesn't know if there is anything *to* say. The world is nothing but a mass of potential things to say, and none of them fit. Justin swallows. He reaches for something, anything to say that feels *right*, and it takes too long to find something that fits. It feels inadequate - weak - like he has nothing more meaningful to say. But the truth is that he doesn't want to jeopardize this with empty words.

"Me, too."

"Do you both trust me?" Lady asked.

Justin nods, saying nothing.

"Yes." Condor says.

"Honored Other, Cosmic Bob. Pardon. We came here for a specific conversation but found ourselves in a different one. I will be back soon to keep you company, but for now, I'll be leaving with these two."

Lady takes Condor and Justin each by the hand, "Ignore the picnic, I'll clean up later." Before leading them to exit the Junkyard world.

Back in Sanctuary, she claps her hands. The elevator arrives, shortly. She takes a slightly dazed Condor and Justin there to the second floor...where the ballroom has rearranged itself to being.

There's two Japanese, paper dividers on either side of the elevator doors. Christine leads Justin behind one and Condor behind the other. Their outfits from the Grand Opening are both there. A fresh lotus flower 'hairpin' for Condor.

"If you ask me, this should've happened ages ago." Christine says. Music starts playing in the background, slow and gentle.

"Enjoy yourselves." The smile in her voice is clear as she re-enters the elevator and heads back down to, presumably, the basement.

When they return back from the dividers, there's a single table with a bottle of champagne, some peanut butter cookies, and a remote control to a 'jukebox.'

Condor's eyes widen in alarm. "Christine, I um, I can't- "

The elevator doors close behind her.

"...dance." Condor looks at Justin.

Justin looks back at Condor. "I, um - I do know how to dance, but - " he hesitates, looking at the table, " - I can teach you if you want. But only if you want to."

He is painfully aware that he's wearing casual clothes - just a button-down and some chinos, prepared for a casual night in, not anything like *this*. He gives a quick glance at the closed elevator doors and then a private smile.

"What do you say? If you want a moment to change -"

Condor takes a few deep breaths, falling back on instinctive shamanistic exercises as a stress response. They become aware of the small spirits all around them. The spirits of the dance floor, of the jukebox, of the lotus. All supportive, in their small ways. As encouraging as spirits that minor can be. Condor's heart is racing, but their words are steady once more as they respond.

"I say that sounds great! Don't, uh, don't wanna get stuck hanging around the back tables whenever Sanctuary hosts a dance."

They look like they're about to step forward, then pause, registering Justin's discomfort and intuiting its cause now that they're a little less focused on their own thoughts. They smile. "And yes, let's get changed first."

Justin ducks behind the divider and gets changed in record speed - long enough to ensure his shirt is tucked military style, to ensure that he's run a hand over the embroidered velvet sections so they'll catch the light correctly, but not enough to make sure his pants aren't stuck behind his shoes or to correct any shirt creases after the jacket is on - and emerges.

He feels uncomfortable, but the outfit lifts his spirits. He knows who he is. Nervousness is one thing, but now is the time - nobody else is here; nobody requires his help or attention other than a dance with - *a dance with his friend. His Condor*. He takes a deep breath then emerges, doing his best to project confidence and excitement rather than fear of rejection, fear of not meeting expectations.

Condor also changes quickly, more by virtue of having something simpler to change into than being practiced at it. They close their eyes for a few seconds, open them, and meet Justin in the center of the floor.

"All right! So, uh, where do we start?"

Justin can't help but smile at Condor's outfit as he reaches out. "Here - take my left hand. Put your right hand on my shoulder," he says as he moves into position. He's nervous, but he hopes that Condor can't tell; he's certainly managed to calm his *voice*, even if his hands aren't as steady as he would like.

"Waltz is simple - it's a three step movement. As I step forward -" he moves his right foot towards Condor, "you would move your corresponding foot back -" he says, "and then mirror the next step -" He takes a step to the right and Condor's left. "Those are the first two steps." He can't quite keep the childlike glee out of his voice as he says this, no matter how much he shoves it down.

Condor's brow furrows as they try to concentrate on Justin's words and feet movements, rather than his hands: shaking slightly, but warm and solid around their own. They manage to step in time, even if it's not exactly graceful.

"So, um. How long has all... *this*," Condor gestures with their eyes, looking around the room, "I mean, how long have *we* been on your mind? Getting closer, like this?"

Justin completes the final of three steps, stepping back with his left foot. His mouth is opening when Condor beats him to the punch. "I - " he doesn't know what to say, as he continues through the steps, leading Condor through them and confident that they will get used to them. It *is* a very simple set of steps. He isn't doing anything fancy; no twirls, no turns.

"I guess - it wasn't a thing that was on my mind when I first met you, it just happened - I just realized it when I-" he stops talking, looking down. "You know. On our trip. I guess I should ask you the same question."

"Fair enough!" Condor begins to find a rhythm, sometimes even keeping it up for a few measures. "I could say it started happening when we met, I suppose. I mean, this kind of thing is never- I mean, like, it's usually a gradual process for me? I see one thing I like about you, then another, and I get to trust you more and more as you *prove* that trust, and soon it's... this."

At first, he has nothing to say, just completing the steps and feeling proud that Condor is *getting it* - that, step by step, the dance is becoming easy - before he pulls himself back and into focus. "When we first met?" he asks, glancing down and playing it off as watching their footwork.

"I - I have to say that it hasn't been like that for me, typically. I feel like I've never met someone before who I didn't want to -" he pauses, flushing, "-before I've known them for ten minutes, before now. And that feeling is a little scary. I don't know how to handle it. I don't know what to do here. But, if it means anything -" He pauses, just enjoying the dance itself, "- you aren't half bad at this."

Condor blushes as well. "Thank you." They pause for a bit, thinking. Comprehending something that's been nagging at them for a while.

"You know," they say, slowly, "I've always thought of you as suave, confident, sure of yourself in social situations, just like... trained and comfortable in the art of human interaction, you know? And to be clear, you're all of those things, and more. I still think so. But what you just said, I mean... I didn't realize that you haven't explored this... side of yourself. That you haven't had a chance to yet. It's a shame."

"And, um, as someone who has had *way* less social experience in general, but... maybe done a little bit more exploring of those specific feelings... I feel like I've lost my last excuse to not just - "

Condor's feet are moving on autopilot now. Their hand grips Justin's shoulder, white-knuckled. Their heart is pounding. There's a sense of static electricity around them, and the faint smell of ozone. The jukebox swells in volume a little.

"Look. Justin. I love you a lot. And - and before you respond, I want you to know that that word itself isn't as important to me as what it represents - and to me, it represents trusting you, and admiring you, and um, maybe wanting to get physically closer if that's okay, and wanting to keep being in each other's lives, and caring a whole lot about how you're doing, and... and wanting you to be safe, and happy, and to share that with me, and... fuck, it means a lot of things, but - as part of those things, I want you to be comfortable, and move at your own pace, and that means that even if I'm figuratively dying to know if you feel the same way, I'd rather us figure it out together than make hasty promises. Does that... make sense?"

"I - " He doesn't know what to say. He stays quiet as Condor requests, as they speak. It's true. It's a shame. He should have said something earlier, something more concrete to reassure his friend of his feelings, even if they might be unwanted.

"Yes. It makes sense."

Justin can feel himself slipping, falling towards formal language as the defense he learned early on. "Condor, it feels unfair to place that pressure on you," he begins. "You don't deserve to have - all of the expectations, be seen as the end-all, be-all, of romantic intent, and on my part -" He reaches out internally, takes control.

"I like you. I might love you. I don't know. I've loved spending time with you and I've loved being able to stay at... your place. With you. I didn't expect that any of this would happen when you offered and I don't know if I've built up the karma to deserve it happening like this."

"I want us to figure it out, too."