Episode 2/Transcript

[*Much like the previous episode, Dave and Muko are seen standing outside of a house.*]

Dave: (Travis S-)-cott isn't dead, and we nearly went to prison last time we tried to kill him.

Muko: It wasn't that hard to hack into his glasses, right?

Dave: It took me a minute, but it worked.

Muko: I think I have an idea; I have a time machine that can take us as far as two days ago before we killed Travis Scott. We could use it to actually take him out!

Dave: That might work, but we have to make sure we don't modify anything else; it might affect us in the future.

[*They arrive at the lab, and Dave is standing in the time machine.*]

Muko: This time machine will take us anywhere we need to go. I know what to do, so I will send you off and I will tell you what to do.

Dave: Why can't you go?

Muko: Because I am famous and people will notice me.

Dave: Okay, fine, I will go and kill Travis Scott.

[*Dave silently yawns and heads into Houston.*]

Dave: Wait, I remember this place; this is where I killed Travis Scott! We need to get back to Astro World so I can hack back into Travis Scott's glasses, but first, I need to find a place to hide for the night; the event continues tomorrow, and Travis Scott will continue the album.

Narrator: *After Dave got some sleep...*

[*Dave wakes up near a park and begins walking down the city.*]

Dave: I think I remember where it is taking place. Not exactly sure, though.

[*He arrives at a marketplace.*]

Dave: Here it is!

[*Muko is monitoring Dave's progress back at the laboratory.*]

Muko: Oh, he found it!

[*Dave is now at a police investigation area.*]

Police officer: Hey! This is a restricted area!

[*He gets nervous, and, possibly out of instinct, he kills the police officer by slapping her. He arrives at the mixer room.*]

Dave: Muko, I've made it to the control room. I will activate the self-destruct module when the time comes.

Muko (in laboratory): Alright! I will continue to track your progress until the time comes.

[*Travis Scott appears on-stage, and the crowd cheers.*]

Travis Scott:

*Can I eat the glizzy? Aaron Yeager*

*Laugh my ass off, Dan (unintelligible) likes kids*

*I was the dead one*

*Hi, Suzy Blue Balls*

*Who was in Paris? Ayo, Hugh back*

*(unintelligible) Hugh, (unintelligible) Suzy*

*I love hot cocoa*

*Who's in Paris? Kirby*

*Who's in Paris? Hungry Man go hungry*

*I got pegged, Yo Mama dead*

*Rosa Parks like my sister*

[*The audience applauds Travis Scott's performance.*]

Travis Scott:

*What's up, 'lil boy*

*'Lil Mosey is the best TikToker*

*(unintelligible)*

*I'm white, lyrical suicide*

*Gave me a skeleton, AIOPM Fortnite Balls*

*I'm gay, I like boys*

*I kidnap autistic kids*

*'Lil Mosey is watching, T-Rex*

*I met big Kanye West*

[*The audience applauds him again, but his glasses destroy themselves.*]

Travis Scott: Wait, the self-destruct module is going off!

[*The audience murmurs as Travis Scott worries. Dave has successfully integrated his plan.*]

Dave: Alright! We did it! I need to get out of here. Muko, bring me back!

[*Dave returns to the present.*]

Muko: Alright; you're back! Did you kill Travis Scott?

Dave: Yes.

Muko: Let's go prove this by checking the news.

On-screen text: *Dave and Muko went back home to check the news...*

[*Dave and Muko are in their living room, and are watching the news on their television.*]

Muko: Look at what made the headlines; "Travis Scott found dead at Astro World; billions still in shock".

[*Dave thrusts his arm in victory.*]

Muko: Let's go to McDonald's to celebrate!

[*Both of them drive to McDonald's.*]

Dave: Do you think the staff will suspect anything?

Muko: No, I'm confident we'll be fine.

[*They arrive at McDonald's, and Caillou is seen sitting at a table.*]

Dave: Oh my god, it's Caillou! Let me smack that bald head!

[*Dave slaps Caillou's head, and a GoAnimate song plays in the background.*]

Caillou: Ow! What was that for?

[*Dave laughs to himself.*]

Boris: Thanks for giving my son a big slap to his bald head.

[*Boris shakes hand with Dave, and Dave returns home with Muko.*]

Muko: Where were you at McDonald's?

Dave: I met Caillou, then slapped his head, then shook hand with his Dad.

[*Both of them high-five each other.*]

Dave: I'm bored. Let's go blow up the White House with the Gluon Gun from the famous 1998 shooter from Valve; Half-Life.

Muko: Okay!

Dave I need to get the White House location first.

[*Dave heads to the laboratory, and the computer screens show edited versions of Gordon Freeman. Muko is in his car.*]

Dave: The White House is at 48501 Hot Street, Chicago, Illinois. Wait, that's the Black House. The White House is actually at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue NW, Washington DC.

Muko: Good, we'll go there right now. Get in the car.

[*Dave enters the car and they start driving.*]

Dave: Do you have the Gluon Gun on you?

Muko: Yes; no need to worry. We will strike in a few hours.

On-screen text: *A few hours later...*

[*Dave and Muko arrive at a park.*]

Dave: We're here.

[*They kiss each other, and Santa appears at their location.*]

Santa: Dave, no homo in my custody! You are grounded.

[*Dave slaps Santa, and he dies again.*]

On-screen text: *After Dave killed Santa (again) the duo boarded a train to Washington DC*

[*Dave and Muko are seen sitting in the train.*]

Muko: This is gonna be so funny! Joe Biden will be so mad at us!

Dave: What if we got banned from McDonald Trump's?

Muko: (laughing) HEYHEEHEYHEEHEHERHEEHAAAAAAA!!

[*The two of them arrive at Washington.*]

Dave: Hang on a moment; I need to forge a government official ID that will let us in.

Muko: That might be helpful.

On-screen text: *Dave and Muko walked up to the White House...*