I'M SO PISSED AT THE AUCTION RESULTS/Confessionals

### Day 24

Okay so, I totally didn't think I'd be able to pull this off. I told the alliance I didn't really want Anthony to go, so of course they decide to vote off Anthony. Out of everyone on the tribe, only Ally and Anthony have really seemed to want to chat. So of course, I'm not going to be happy with that. Literally if they had given Tucker the majority, this would not have been a problem. I would not have gone out of my way to change the vote.
Anyways, I let Anthony know, and yeah. I'm just so happy this worked. It's crazy to me that I was one of the main people behind this, AND IT WORKED. Wow, definitely getting my toes wet here. So it looks like we now have a 5 person majority alliance. So hopefully I can at least make it to final 5! This whole experience has been amazing so far.
Additional note: In case Anthony got voted off, he shared a spreadsheet with me with all the places him and Conor had searched for the idol, so now I have that and MAYBE I can find an idol! :D

yeah no, fuck that i'm livid. goddd what the fuck just happened. why are two inactive blobs still in this game. why can't people stick to fucking plans. why is my number one ally gone. why am i always in this predicament. whyyy do people feel a need to feign emotional vulnerability before driving knives through your back.
faith is now officially gone and things blew up. i should've seen it coming, she was literally asking me to consider playing the idol on her hours before the vote, but no my dumbass was confident in the vote bc i thought i had christine and benj wrapped around my finger, but that's my own arrogant fault.
i shouldn't have told christine and benj that a group was formed without them. that gave them the initiative to strike against faith. i tried telling them that it wasn't made because they were targets but it was more of a voting bloc and i figured at least if they wanted to tee off on faith they would've told me and i could've changed things up, instead they brilliantly lied to me about it acting fine and worked with the inactive blobs to go for a counter blindside. i can't help but feel a lot of this is my fault.
what's a little more annoying is that lexi flipped as well (i'm about 90% sure) and she went on this tangent about how this game will be tough the next day bc of her grandmother's funeral, and apparently according to danielle she was like venting and talking to her about it. and i told her to i would say, i will look out for you this vote bc those circumstances aren't ideal and i feel it's fair for you. all to just turn her back on all of us the next vote. fuck that.
so now it's me/danielle/ally/scott against the rest, 5-4 is nothing big, shit could be worse, it just hurts a lot more being without faith as an ally because she was my solid #1 all game. i'm gonna hopefully use benj/christine as my inroads to at least take the vote off of me, but i have no idea how we can gain a majority this round straight up, i have to look for cracks, and i don't want to use my idol unless i lose immunity and the targets on me.
i need this immunity and if i guess i'm gonna try to lock this vote onto lexi. but rn i need to find a new number 1 because the options i thought i had for the endgame either just got voted out or flipped against me.

### Day 25

I'm slowly trying to wiggle myself in, I can't be too distant nor too forceful with Christine, I'm not gonna like reveal my entire game to her but I want to leave the door open, and I'm gonna trust that should my name become a potential target she woudl tell me.
The trickiest part for me is handling my idol, things would be a lot easier if only Faith knew, but I also decided to tell Benj weeks ago and yeaaah I'm having buyer's remorse there, he easily has the power to tell anyone and everyone about it and can just misdirect me with voting plans to make me misplay it. I'm really curious and I'm gonna see how he approaches me about the blindside to see if I can trust him to any degree still.
With Benj knowing I kinda almost need to use my idol as a public shield if need be, like I've already told Ally/Danielle, maybe I should tell Scott/Christine? Having more people know about your idol either makes them steer clear of you or makes them target you so I'm weighing back and forth on this one.

I obviously need to see how the auction/immunity goes, but rn the target on the other side is Scott first, and I can thank Benj/Christine for that, and I think the guys want to keep Ally/Danielle safe since they're acting as lost puppy dogs. My options rn areee
1) Let Scott go 5-4 and then Benj/Christine flip to take out Anthony/Tucker next round.
2) Play my idol properly and draw the line and stay loyal with Ally/Danielle/Scott, say hey motherfuckers I'll go to rocks and I couldn't care less.
It really depends how much I can trust Benj/Christine not to fuck with me or misdirect me, but I truly do believe I'm good for their games and that my incentives align with theirs, like if they get rid of me they really are by themselves and at the bottom of their alliance and won't have anywhere to turn to.

### Day 26

There's two ways that other side could vote, I think they're either gonna vote Danielle bc she's fucking locked and loaded with items as a better long term move OR vote Ally because she has the dark pearl as a better short term move. However, the majority is still fighting themselves a losing battle as long as me and Danielle play our items, ideally her vote steal and my extra vote. This vote should be easy IN THEORY, me Ally Danielle and Scott just need to lock in and find a target and fucking stick to it. I want Anthony bc he has that idol clue so he's on the same grounds as me and Ally in the search, and bc he's the best player from the other side.
I'm still beyond glad I have my relationships with Benj and Christine to take an immediate target off me for now, and I was able to at least come to an understand of the vote with Lexi, rather than be at some cold bitter grudge about it. Ideally, even with Danielle playing one item of hers, her target should still be greater than mine, while it'll look like I have nothing once I flush out my extra vote. Auctions have almost always fucked me in the ass but for once I think it's went well??
Ever since Faith got blindsided I will never be 100% confident on any vote from here on out but I think this is the best shot we'll get to take a swing at one of these fools, so it's time to lock in and fire the FUCK AWAY

But its kinda my fault for idiotically distributing the money
OH WELL.
My alliance got jack shit aswell literally immunity is only useful for this round and the idol clue doesn't really help
Danielle getting 3 items is so scary she is so lucky lmao but its also kinda a target.
Anyway we are probs voting Ally cuz of her extra vote. But shes not actually going cuz of Danis items! Love you Ally <3
Me Evan and Christines secret trio is really working even though we voting differently
Sorry to who they vote but with Dani's items theres nothing we can really do :((((( Just bad auction luck. If it didn't play out like that idk what woulda happened :O Good luck everyone and remember its survivor

It's weird, like when you're up in numbers theoretically for this vote you should feel very comfortable, but there's this uneasy nerve and it almost feels like the opposing side has tried too little heading into this, it's either that or I just see their attempt to gain a majority this vote as weak when it's really all the best they can do.
If my read and intuition is correct, this vote is going to be 6-5 with Ally escaping and Anthony going. Danielle should be using her vote steal and I'm using my double vote. They're telling Danielle/Ally it's me but I truly think it's a misdirect and that the girls are playing into Anthony's new power to make him feel he can control their votes, and throw it off to me while they take out Ally. Ally is their best target because she has the dark pearl vote, thus voting her maximizes the amount of advantages we have to use from our side to gain a majority, but that's exactly what we're doing bc we me/Ally/Danielle/Scott can't just fall down like dominoes.
I'm trying to play a more social game that's not predicated on immunity idols or immunity runs, and I'm TRUSTING that my side alliance with Benj and Christine is telling me the truth, bc they're also telling me my name is a misdirect and Ally is the vote, with Benj he 100% knows what's going on but with Christine I'm telling her most of it but not the exact details, but no matter what if I escape this vote I'm securing my side alliance with them bc I quite frankly owe them and have to show them I trust them moving forward, so I'd make a chat with them and start a separate idol search from the one I have w/ Ally and Danielle.
A theory I'm trying to play this game off of is that the best way to manuever through the game is to rip out human emotions and ensure that enough people's incentives line up with yours each and every round, you gotta put yourself in their shoes, and if I'm Christine/Benj, I don't see a benefit in lying to me and blindsiding me and piss off another juror when they can have a perfectly hidden side alliance in the works.
I'm nervous but I'd rather be like this every vote than overly confident like I was last round, it's time to put all the chips in the table and believe in hope.