Headhunters 4: The Elite Eleven

## Introduction

He Mixoned up his team with a ton of bidding, his Mahomie came through, but the rest of the squad couldn't beer the weight and Keeling got his cocktail shaken in week six.

## In Memorium: Mixon It Up With Mahomie

After a surprising 6th place finish last week, Mahomie went big and dropped 58% of his budget on a QB, a WR, and a RB. Surely things would improve? Well they didn't, and do call me surely.

While most weeks I can wax poetic about teams, this week I don't have a whole lot to say. The squad was underwhelming from jump and averaged the 2nd-worst points per game among the five eliminated teams, ahead of only the one week wonder Coach Knows. They chased points by acquiring James Robinson, who has saw his usage and explosiveness tank over the last few weeks as Etienne gets more comfortable in what is essentially his rookie campaign. He fell for the allure of Matthew Stafford, whose shittiness just eliminated Executioner a week ago. He had nowhere to turn at TE and had to start Conklin, who has just six targets since Wilson took over for Flacco.

This was a team that had all the energy of the *Survivor* contestant who doesn't get a lot of screentime because they didn't do anything interesting on the island and producers knew they were getting voted out day 15 anyway.

Mixon It Up:

## Dead Money

Keeping track of all the cash that never got spent by teams that are now eliminated.

Dead Money 2022

## New Releases

1. Patrick Mahomes
2. Joe Mixon
3. Terry McLaurin
4. Clyde Edwards-Helaire
5. Christian Kirk

## Week Five Bidding Results

#### Quick-Hit Thoughts

* Muller Lite got got with Rashaad Penny. Henry VIII bought him for $8 on 9/21, then dropped him on 10/2 for a defense only for Penny to have a career game. $76 of Lite's stash later, and Penny is on season-ending IR.
* Bad Boys clearly saw the bye weeks coming as they were in the mix for both QBs but fell short in both cases. Bad Boys has one more shot this week to cover for Davis Mills, his QB2, who is on a week 6 bye.
* You have to hand it to Mahomie. They went out swinging with three huge bids for Robinson, Kirk, and Stafford. Unfortunately, they combined for just 39.65 off a projected 68.09.
* You know things are bad for Kyle Pitts when he got just two bids and both were low double-digits.

## Money Spent Per Week

Money Spent Per Week
 3

$3 and a player short of tying the busiest week five in Headhunters history.

## Week Five Results

* Biggest Climber: Hasa Laviska Baby (^7)
* Biggest Faller: Wildcat (v6)

## Kings of the Castle

This week we begin focusing in on byes and the potential problems it could cause.

### 1. Burrow for sure-oh

Sweet Dee treated Henry VIII like an innocent cameraman walking in front of Davante Adams after an embarrassig loss and shoved her way into first place late Monday night. The Sure-Oh Duo of Adams and Kupp has paid off so far, but Adams has a bye and it will be interesting to see if his return is pushed down the road after the tantrum heard 'round the world.

### 2. Henry VIII

Usurped in the final hour by sure-oh, Ol' Eighth had another solid outing thanks to massive days from a couple core players. However, scary hours are approaching as QB2 and TE1 both enter the bye and Henry hasn't won a single huge bid all year.

### 3. Hasta Laviska Baby

80.77 points from week 5 are going to need replacement with Carr and Jacobs on the bye, but the fact that both McCaffrey and Barkley are healthy and producing is a huge plus for Baby. They've basically been lying dormant all year, but it may be time for them to make like Mount Stromboli and erupt (not sexual...also Mount Stromboli is a hilarious name for a volcano).

### 4.Laser Rocket Arms

You know who is good at football? Josh Allen. You know who else? AJ Brown. You know who else? Dallas Goedert. You know who else? Dalvin Cook. Rocket Arms has a superstar at every position. And all of them have a week 7 bye. If they don't win another big, they'll replace those guys with Jimmy G, David Montgomery, and Elijah Moore. Not the worst, but the TE situation is a little spooky.

### 5. deCaPitated

Both Pierce and Henry, the anchors of the RB-corp, have the week off. Will CP be in on Mixon to try and shore up the gap? Or will he turn to Nyheim Hines and Mchael Carter to try and survive?

## On the Chopping Block

### 11. Out of Luck

Out of Luck is back where he started. He is down a QB with Goff off and has an even bigger problem if he manages to survive this week with Justin Jefferson's bye lurking in week seven. He's weathered some storms (no QBs drafted, the Evans suspension, the Swift injury), but the vibes are not good for Out of Luck.

### 10. Bad Boys II - The Soundtrack

Trending up. Pitts is coming off the bye, perhaps having practiced something other than blocking? Hopkins is one game away from a return. Kamara looks like the Alvin of old. Etienne is coming into his own. The question will be if it's enough to get him through another couple weeks, In week 7 he loses Akers and Diggs to the bye.

### 9. Muller Lite

Holy shit I think the Seahawks passing attack might be good. That would be massive for Muller and the suddenly fantasy viable Tyler Lockett. Elsewhere, what is Lite to do with Najee "Nah G I ain't scoring" Harris? Surviving this week with Teddy B putting up a goose egg at this point in the season speaks volumes. The Fantasy Gods really like this guy for some reason.

### 8. Wildcat (no QBs no problem)

Almost the entire team has its bye in the next three weeks, and the QBs are locked in until week 10 (when we have an automatic non-elimination scheduled). Things are set up nicely for a team that nobody thought would make it until mid-October. They are the lone champion remaining.

### 7. Beach McBungalow

Never really felt like Bungalow as in danger, but a pivotal play where CEH had a TD reversed and given to Kelce put away any doubt that McBungalow was making it to week six. Could be losing Cooper Rush and Winston isn't healthy and Nate loves fantasy stacks. I suspect a huge bid incoming for Mahomes. Sorry...Mahomie.

## Average Scores of Eliminated Teams

Average Scores of Eliminated Teams
 It's Blitz! Track 2
 Bobecue Chicken
 Mixon It Up With Mahomie
 CoachKnows

## Narrow Defeats

Margin of Defeat for Last Place Teams:

Margin of Defeat for Eliminated Teams
 It's Blitz! Track 2
 Bobecue Chicken
 The Executioner
 Mixon It Up With Mahomie

## Rulers of the Kingdom

2022 first place finishers:

Top Scorers by Week
 2
 3
 4
 5

For the second season in a row, we have five different first place finishers in the first five weeks. We'll see if we can set a new record in week six.

## Dungeon Dwellers

2022 teams that finished second-to-last, narrowly avoiding elimination:

Low Scorers by Week
 2
 3
 4
 5

## Single Season Scoring Records

As teams get eliminated, their single season performance will appear here.

Mixon becomes the first team to finish a season between 800-900 points.

## All-Time Combined Points Scored

Same as above: eliminated teams will have their 2022 season added to the total.

## Remaining Budget

Bad news for Out of Luck as he was on the verge of elimination and has the least amount of money left. Could be tough sledding for the next month and he may need some non-eliminations to bail him out.