Cooler CA-1 Terminal Entries

## **CoolAir Evacuation Staging Terminal**

**Greetings, Coolermates!**

**If you are reading this message, it means you have been successfully thawed out of cryogenic sleep and are ready to lay down the foundations for a brand new civilization!**

**Now before you go running out into the great unknown, please take a moment to peruse this document: these few minutes could save your life and the lives of your fellow Coolermates!**

* **Evacuation Staging Areas**
* **Survival Tips & Hints**
* **Quit**

### **Evacuation Staging Areas**

**You are currently standing in the CoolAir Evacuation Colony's "Evacuation Staging Area." This area houses several meeting rooms and facilities related to your colony's field of expertise.**

**Though the CoolAir Evacuation Colony is stocked with enough food and survival supplies to last a few weeks, it is important for the continued survival of human civilization that you and your fellow Coolermates cooperate to create a sustainable and habitable world above.**

**The Evacuation Staging Area should be used to collaborate and draft up a comprehensive plan for surviving in the new world, and most importantly, making contact with other Cool Air Evacuation Colonies as soon as possible.**

**Consult the Survival Tips & Hints section for more info.**

### **Survival Tips & Hints**

**The CoolAir Evacuation Colony was designed to house the best and brightest members of society during a catastrophic event.**

**As such, the world above may be a much different place than you left it.**

**Please select the nature of your catastrophe:**

* **In case of a Volcanic Event**
* **In case of a Flooding Event**
* **In case of a Seismic Event**
* **In case of a Nuclear Event**
* **Back**

#### **In case of a Volcanic Event**

**In case of a Volcanic Event...**

**Be aware that magma is hot and should be handled with care. Avoid contact with skin, eyes, or hair, as burning may occur.**

**If you find yourself on fire, stop, drop, and roll. If a fellow Coolermate is on fire, verbally remind them to stop, drop, and roll. Please note that the effectiveness of stopping, dropping, and rolling is greatly diminished if immolation is the result of submersion in magma.**

**If cooled magma is preventing exit from the CoolAir Evacuation Colony, it may be necessary to drill your way out. If your colony is not equipped with a drill, please stand by while a fellow colony comes to your assistance.**

#### **In case of a Flooding Event**

**In case of a Flooding Event...**

**Be aware that during cryogenic sleep muscles may atrophy, so it is important to take necessary precautions before attempting to swim.**

**Also be aware that the CoolAir Evacuation Colony may be completely submerged in water. In this case, getting out may be very difficult, if not impossible. This should be a point of conversation with your Coolermates.**

**Lastly, be sure to collect any dirt or dust particles that may have been left behind by you or your fellow Coolermates as they may carry a high premium in an aquatic society.**

#### **In case of a Seismic Event**

**In case of a Seismic Event...**

**In case of an aftershock, locate the nearest desk and duck and cover underneath until the event has passed.**

**Be aware that street signs and roadmaps should be read with skepticism, as they may not accurately reflect the topography of the world.**

#### **In case of a Nuclear Event**

**In case of a Nuclear Event...**

**Prolonged exposure to nuclear fallout may cause mutations to occur. If such a mutation does occur, determine if your mutation can be used to benefit your colony. If it cannot, please submit yourself to your fellow Coolermates for immediate quarantine.**

**Additionally, roaches and other vermin may have survived the explosion and may provide a valuable source of protein when the colony's supplies have been exhausted. Roach farming is highly recommended.**

### **Quit**

**Goodbye, and good luck in the new world!**

**- Alistair Hubbard,**

**Founder, Alistair Research Labs**

## **CoolAir Patient Medical Terminal**

**CoolAir Patient Medical Record**

**ERROR:**

**No medical record on file.**

## **CoolAir Presentation Projector**

**CoolAir Presentation Projector Controls**

**Make a selection below:**

* **Turn off projector**
* **Quit**

## **Administrator's Office Terminals**

### **Administrator's Personal Computer**

**Logged in as user TARY.**

* **Journal Entry: The day the world ended**
* **Journal Entry: Presenting, Dr. AdminisTARY!**
* **Journal Entry: I'd rather take AliSTAIRS!!!**
* **Journal Entry: Eureka Tary!**
* **Journal Entry: Final preparations**
* **Journal Entry: Untitled Document**
* **Quit**

#### **Journal Entry: The day the world ended**

**September 19th, 1980. The day the world ended. Well, not for us!**

**I can still hear the atomic bombs from down here in the CoolAir Evacuation Colony... Bet it looks like a GORILLAS 2 endgame screen up there... Heeheehee!!!**

**Luckily, for the future of humanity, the U.S. Government thought it prudent to preserve the mind of one Dr. Tary (and some of my peers in the California medical community, too I suppose).**

**As soon as the Soviets leveled their retaliatory strike at us, the government gathered California's smartest doctors and shuffled us into this here CoolAir Evacuation Colony.**

**From what I've heard, they intend to cryogenically freeze us, and thaw us out once most of the radiation's cleared out to rebuild America's medical system from the ground up.**

**Looks like the dumb jocks and bullies that weren't smart enough to make the cut are just gonna have to fry out there in the nuclear hellfire, boohoo, heeheehee!!!**

**Anyways, according to the literature I've found in here, we're supposed to be electing an Administrator pretty soon. Of course, Dr. Tary, one of "California's smartest doctors" according to the U.S. Government, will be throwing down his gauntlet for title of Leader of California's Smartest Doctors!!**

**Wish me luck!**

**- Dr. Tary**

#### **Journal Entry: Presenting, Dr. AdminisTARY!**

**The tally is in: looks like I'll be the Administrator of this here CoolAir facility. Seemed like everyone else was happy to give up the opportunity after reading about the extra responsibilities the Administrator's gotta take on. Those jackalopes probably don't even realize the history books will forever herald me as the undisputed leader of medicine in the new world while those BOZOS fade away into obscurity! Heeheehee!!!**

**Now to read this Administrator's manual and see what I've actually gotta do...**

#### **Journal Entry: I'd rather take AliSTAIRS!!!**

**The technology in here simply boggles the mind. I was thumbing through the CoolAir Administrator's manual and found this delightful nugget:**

**"Alistair's AirLift(tm) Elevator Systems operate using a state-of-the-art, proprietary conveyance mechanism. Say goodbye to those long, awkward elevator rides alone with the boss's sexy secretary; Alistair's AirLift(tm) Elevators will take you where you want to be in the blink of an eye!"**

**Sounds good on paper, but the bozos at Alistair Research Labs didn't take into account the rapid atmospheric pressure changes that occur when you change elevation too quickly until \*after\* they installed the dang things in these CoolAir Evacuation Colonies. Bet their QA monkeys were puking everywhere!!**

**Their quick fix? Limit all the elevators from moving between more than two floors. So to get from the Evacuation Staging Areas to my own bedroom, I've got to walk through like six entire floors! What a pain! At this rate, I'd rather take AliSTAIRS! Heeheehee!!!**

**There's a reason why Alistair Research Labs is getting licked by Innovatrix Business Solutions: all they care about is making things bigger and faster without giving a flipping heck about usability.**

**Heck, even the Alistair VI's they've got installed in this place are a riot. They've got a blistering 66 megahertz processor, really put through its paces powering this tacky monochrome terminal based operating system. Word processor doesn't even properly handle word wrapping! What is this, 1965?**

**This is caveman tech compared the brand spankin' new IBS Concord I've got at home... or \*had\* I should say...**

**Maybe I should keep one of these Alistair VI's for myself... Who knows how long it'll be before the computer industry gets going again... At least these things have GORILLAS 1 pre-installed on them...**

#### **Journal Entry: Eureka Tary!**

**Found an unopened Alistair VI in a maintenance supply room. I've hidden it underneath the stairs to my bedroom so that nobody'll get wise to my plan, especially that pig-headed buffoon, "Doctor" Joseph Gibson.**

**Eureka Tary!**

#### **Journal Entry: Final preparations**

**Did my last check on the CoolAir admin console. Besides a little glitch I encountered in the NoLeak Airlock systems, everything seems ready to go. Doesn't seem to be a problem as the fail-safe isn't preventing me from starting the CoolAir Cryogenic Hybernation process. Knowing Alistair though, I'm surprised it wasn't called the NoLOCK AirLEAK system!! Heeheehee!!!**

**I've briefed everyone on the cryogenic procedures (though I might've forgotten to mention a few things to a certain Dr. Gibson, heeheehee!!!!!). Wearing these CoolAir suits, we look like a bunch of astronauts headed to space. But we aren't headed to space... No. We're headed... To the FUTURE!!!**

**This is Dr. Tary signing off for the last time in this millenium. See you all in 40 years!!!**

#### **Journal Entry: Untitled Document**

**IM MEEN**

**IM GREEN**

**AND IM**

**HEEHEEHEEN**

**OL JOE GIBSON TUREND INTO A LITLE WEAK SCARWNEY OF SHTI PUNCHED HIM ONCE AND HE FKLPPING EXPLOD HEEHEE**

**TIEM TO SHOW EM WHAT THE LEDER OF THE SMARTAS OF CACA CAN DO AND KIL EMAL**

**THIS IS MY CACA AND ILL DO AS I PLEZ**

**ERUEKRA TRAY**

### **Cooler Administration Console**

**Welcome, TARY.**

**CoolAir Administration Console**

**Please select an option below:**

* **Diagnostics**
* **Quit**

#### **Diagnostics**

**Available diagnostics reports:**

* **CoolAir Cryogenic Chambers**
* **CoolAir NoLeak(tm) Airlock Door**
* **CoolAir FreshAir(tm) Atmospheric Regulator**
* **CoolAir AirLift(tm) Elevator System**
* **CoolAir SpeakEZ(tm) PA System**
* **CoolAir Serpent Protocol(tm)**
* **Back**

##### **CoolAir Cryogenic Chambers**

**CoolAir Cryogenic Chambers**

**Status: DECOMMISSIONED**

**CoolAir Cryogenic Hibernation started successfully at 18:24:51 on 9/20/80.**

**CoolAir Cryogenic Hibernation completed successfully at 18:41:22 on 9/20/80.**

##### **CoolAir NoLeak(tm) Airlock Door**

**CoolAir NoLeak(tm) Airlock DoorWelcome,**

**[USER\_NAME].Maiiiiiiiiiii**

**Status: UNKNOWN**

**CoolAir NoLeak(tm) Airlock closed successfully at -2:80:69 on -1/62/31.**

**CoolAir NoLeak(tm) Airlock opened successfully at 554:-1:256 on -1/13/-1vbloeok3f1-2941.//#1294149749,viappefkdas**

**ERROR -1: No such error.**

* **Override NoLeak(tm) Airlock**
* **Return**

###### **Override NoLeak(tm) Airlock**

**Packet timed out. Please contact Alistair Research Labs with error code: or successfully opened!ould not be opened.ly closeddddddddddddd**

##### **CoolAir FreshAir(tm) Atmospheric Regulator**

**CoolAir FreshAir(tm) Atmospheric Regulator**

**Status: ONLINE**

**WARNING: Radiation leak detected at 7:35:29 on 9/21/80**

**WARNING: High levels of radiation detected on 7:36:41 on 9/21/80. Please evacuate CoolAir Evacuation Colony immediately.**

##### **CoolAir AirLift(tm) Elevator System**

**CoolAir AirLift(tm) Elevator System**

**Status: ONLINE**

**MAINTENANCE MODE: Access to Generators currently disabled.**

* **Disengage Maintenance Mode**
* **Return**

##### **CoolAir SpeakEZ(tm) PA System**

**CoolAir SpeakEZ(tm) PA System**

**Status: ONLINE**

##### **CoolAir Serpent Protocol(tm)**

**CoolAir Serpent Protocol(tm)**

**Status: ONLINE**

## **Cryochambers Terminals**

### **Securidisk Terminal**

**Scanning...**

**Securidisk detected...**

**Identity verified.**

**Welcome Administrator TARY.**

**Administrative Controls:**

* **Open Technology Chamber.**
* **Cancel**

### **Technology Chamber Terminal**

**Administrator TARY,**

**Welcome to the Technology Chambers.**

**Once the Coolermates have assembled, please deliver the attached speech.**

**Afterwards, please view the the Nation Foundation Manifest for more information on the Nation Foundation Kits provided to your CoolAir Evacuation Colony and facilitate the deployment of the aforementioned kits.**

* **Speech to Coolermates**
* **Nation Foundation Manifest**
* **(ADMIN) Serpent Protocol**
* **Cancel**

#### **Speech to Coolermates**

**"Greetings all, and welcome to the Technology Chamber.**

**Housed within these chambers are three Nation Foundation Kits, hand selected by the good folks at Alistair Research Labs.**

**On their own, each Nation Foundation Kit contains tools vital to our profession and our survival, but as a whole, these kits will provide a full set of tools to ensure mankind survives in the new world. As such, while it IS important for us to establish a base of operations in the new world, it is more important still that we use these tools to seek out our fellow Coolermates from other CoolAir Evacuation Colonies.**

**As your elected Administrator, I thank you all for your patience and cooperation, and wish us all luck in this exciting new world!"**

#### **Nation Foundation Manifest**

**3 available Nation Foundation Kit(s):**

**Make a selection below for more information:**

* **1x Excremator Throne Kit**
* **1x Manatomical Model Kit**
* **1x Weird Science Chemistry Kit**
* **Back**

##### 1x **Excremator Throne Kit**

**Excremator Throne Kit**

**Human waste. Pee-yew! There's no bigger eye AND nose sore than a steaming heap of yesterday's meatloaf! Not to mention the health risks of living in a literal pile of you-know-what!**

**Worry not, the Excremator Throne is here! By harnessing the destructive atomic power of state of the art science, the Excremator incinerates your unsightly mounds and instantly turns them into slightly more manageable piles of ash.**

**Simply sit on the Excremator, perform your bowel business, and once you're ready, hit the flusher. In a hot second, your waste will be incinerated, leaving virtually no trace of your shameful body functions.**

##### 1x **Manatomical Model Kit**

**Manatomical Model Kit**

**We've all been there: stitching together an eviscerated patient, when suddenly: Uh oh! Do the arms go here? Which one of these things is the kidney, anyways?**

**Well, worry no longer! With the Manatomical Model Kit, you'll always have a 100% anatomically correct model of the human body at hand! And foot! And all of the other human body parts, too!**

##### **1x Weird Science Chemistry Kit**

**Weird Science Chemistry Kit**

**Nothing says "I'm very well educated and have a medical degree" like a bunch of beakers and bunsen burners. With the Weird Science Chemistry Kit, you'll be able to perform science with ease and comfort!**

**Each Weird Science Chemistry Kit comes with a standard chemistry set with all the fixings, as well as assorted chemicals for you to mix and experiment with.**

#### **(ADMIN) Serpent Protocol**

**As the Administrator of this CoolAir Evacuation Colony, you possess the sole discretion to enact the Serpent Protocol.**

**The Serpent Protocol is a fail-safe to be used only in cases of catastrophic failure, such as hostile takeover, by (a) ensuring the safety of humanity from extinction via the evacuation of you and ONE reproductive partner and (b) permanently sealing access to the Technology Chamber, preventing aggressors from using the Nation Foundation Kits for their own gains.**

**Information regarding the Serpent Protocol is to be kept STRICTLY CONFIDENTIAL.**

* **About the Serpent Protocol**
* **Initiate Serpent Protocol**
* **Back**

##### **About the Serpent Protocol**

**The Serpent Protocol is a two-stage emergency CoolAir Evacuation Colony evacuation protocol.**

**Upon activation, the Technology Chamber is permanently sealed from the outside. This is to prevent the technology held within the Nation Foundation Kits from falling into the hands of potential aggressors and being used against the evacuees.**

**Activating the Serpent Protocol will also activate the two Evacuation Pods located within the Technology Chamber.**

**To ensure both the future survival of the human race and that the Serpent Protocol is not abused by a single Administrator, the Evacuation pods will not function unless the Administrator is accompanied by viable reproductive partner.**

**Once both Evacuation Pods are determined to be occupied by the CoolAir Evacuation Colony's main system, the Evacuation Pods will be launched at high velocity through the colony's exhaust port, and ejected into the atmosphere above.**

##### **Initiate Serpent Protocol**

**The SERPENT PROTOCOL has been activated. Please stand clear of the Technology Chamber doors.**

**The Technology Chamber has been permanently sealed and the Evacuation Pods are now open.**

**Evacuation will commence automatically once a subject has been detected in each of the Evacuation Pods.**

## **Personal Terminals**

### **ARE YOU WITH ME BROTHERS**

**Welcome to Alistair BSS!**

* **MESSAGE: ARE YOU WITH ME BROTHERS**
* **MESSAGE: RE: ARE YOU WITH ME BROTHERS**
* **Quit**

#### **MESSAGE: ARE YOU WITH ME BROTHERS**

**From: jimg.ca1**

**To: all.ca1**

**Subject: ARE YOU WITH ME BROTHERS**

**CANT REMEMBER HOW TO DO ALL THAT SMART STUFF I USED TO DO SO IM GONNA GO KILL SOME THINGS INSTEAD**

**ARE YOU WITH ME BROTHERS**

#### **MESSAGE: RE: ARE YOU WITH ME BROTHERS**

**From: even.ca1**

**To: jimg.ca1**

**Subject: RE: ARE YOU WITH ME BROTHERS**

**IM A GIRL**

### **GREEN STUFF**

**Welcome to Alistair BSS!**

* **MESSAGE: GREEN STUFF**
* **Quit**

#### **MESSAGE: GREEN STUFF**

**From: jimg.ca1**

**To: all.ca1**

**THE GREEN STUFFS GOOD**

**I DRANK ONE AND GREW AN EXTRA FINGER**

**AND IM NOT TALKIN ABOUT ON MY HANDS HAHAHAHAHAHA**

### **In light of current events...**

**Welcome to Alistair BBS!**

* **MESSAGE: In light of current events...**
* **MESSAGE: RE: In light of current events...**
* **Quit**

#### **MESSAGE: In light of current events...**

**From: tart.ca1**

**To: all.ca1**

**Subject: In light of current events...**

**Dear colleagues, in light of the somewhat tumultuous events that are currently unfolding, I've attached the latest issue of my video game newsletter to this message. Enjoy!**

**- Dr. Tary**

**TARY'S TURBOPLAY!!! [Issue #295]**

**Tary's Take!**

**GORILLAS 2: MAD MAD MONKEYS**

**WHAT IS IT?**

**The long awaited sequel to last year's GORILLAS: two banana-bomb brandishing baboons decimate the New York skyline in a mano-y-monkey all-out ape-tillery battle to the death. Kong, eat your heart out!**

**TARY'S TAKE:**

**Weighed down by the dreadfully outdated Alistair V, the original GORILLAS was truly a surprise hit, making the most of the V's meager processing capabilities by presenting its combat in a thoughtful, turn based manner - a far cry from the blistering fast real-time combat we've come to expect from our local arcades, but a unique and engaging experience nonetheless.**

**GORILLAS 2 takes the fight to IBS's sleek new, Concord computer and boy howdy does it show! Unfettered by the V's shortcomings, GORILLAS 2 does away with the long waits while your opponent dials in the banana toss - these new battles are 100% real-time baby! Players are now given an endless arsenal of banana-bombs, which they can hurl towards their opponents as fast as they can mash their fire buttons. In the mere seconds it takes for the barrage of bananas to burst, the stunningly rendered cityscape is reduced to absolute cinders, and more often than not, both apes along with it.**

**While most games result in a draw match, there's no better way to show off the power of your new Concord computer than to boot up this bad boy and let the bananas fly.**

**Hasta la vista, baboon.**

**FINAL SCORE: 5/5 - EUREKA!**

#### **MESSAGE: RE: In light of current events...**

**From: josg.ca1**

**To: tart.ca1**

**Subject: RE: In light of current events...**

**Great, and here I was hoping that the nuclear apocalypse would wipe out the out-of-shape shut-in video-game playing troglodytes. I think you've mistaken this fallout shelter for your mother's basement, dear Tary.**

**- Dr. Gibson**

* **Dear colleagues, in light of the somewhat tumultuous events that are currently unfolding, I've attached the latest issue of my video game newsletter to this message. Enjoy! - Dr. Tary [MESSAGE TRUNCATED]**

### **Medistims?**

**Welcome to Alistair BBS!**

* **MESSAGE: Medistims?**
* **MESSAGE: RE: Medistims?**
* **Quit**

#### **MESSAGE: Medistims?**

**From: wile.ca1**

**To: all.ca1**

**Subject: Medistims?**

**While going through the medical inventory, I noticed these "Medistim" things lying around. Now, I know FDA approval probably doesn't mean much in the new world, hell, FDA's not even gonna be a thing anymore. But have these things even been inspected by a medical board of any kind?**

**I'm sure a lot of us would be a lot more willing to stick ourselves with half-inch needles if we knew they wouldn't kill us.**

**- Will**

#### **MESSAGE: RE: Medistims?**

**From: wile.ca1**

**To: all.ca1**

**Subject: RE: Medistims?**

**STATUS UPDATE THESE THINGS ARE GREAT JUST STAB THEM IN ANYTHING THAT HURTS HAHAHAHAHAHA YAYAYA**

### **my dkikn iksd foalikgmn offd**

**Welcome to Alistair BBS!**

* **MESSAGE: my dkikn iksd foalikgmn offd**
* **Quit**

#### **MESSAGE: my dkikn iksd foalikgmn offd**

**From: gorf.ca1**

**To: all.ca1**

**Subject: my dkikn iksd foalikgmn offd**

**helgpl**

### **PUNCH PINKSKINS**

**Welcome to Alistair BSS!**

* **MESSAGE: PUNCH PINKSKINS**
* **Quit**

#### **MESSAGE: PUNCH PINKSKINS**

**From: matp.ca1**

**To: all.ca1**

**Subject PUNCH PINKSKINS**

**WOULD BE CAREFUL ABOUT PUNCHING THE SCRAWNY MELTED ONES LAST ONE I PUNCHED EXPLODED AND GOT ITS GUTS ALL OVER ME**

**PUNCH PINKSKINS INSTEAD THEY POP OR CRUNCH DEPENDING ON WHERE YOU HIT EM HAHA OOOH YEA**

### **Repopulation**

**Welcome to Alistair BBS!**

* **MESSAGE: Repopulation**
* **MESSAGE: Re: Repopulation**
* **Quit**

#### **MESSAGE: Repopulation**

**From: rica**

**To: evan**

**Subject: Repopulation**

**Dearest Dr. Eva Nassim,**

**Now that we find ourselves on the precipice of humanity's destruction, I have been giving thought to the monumental task that now lies before us: the repopulation of this new Earth.**

**I feel you would make my ideal breeding partner - between the two of us, I am sure we will be able to ensure that intelligence survives to the next generation of humanity. I've surreptitiously surveyed your physical appearance over the course of these past few hours, and I've found myself irresistibly attracted to you physically, and have not been able to keep my thoughts from straying to the exquisite pillowy vistas that must lie beneath your cooler suit.........,, please let us repopulate this earth dearest eva i could repopulate the entirety of the usa, no, the world with you...........,,,,**

**keeping you forever in my thoughts.....**

**dr richard ables**

#### **MESSAGE: Re: Repopulation**

**From: evan.ca1**

**To: rica.ca1**

**Subject: Re: Repopulation**

**Hey, I think you sent this to the wrong address. This is the address of Evan Nester, not Evelyne Nassim. I'd be happy to pass this along to her for you, though.**

**- Evan**

* **Dearest Dr. Eva Nassim, Now that we find ourselves on the precipice of humanity's destruction, I have been giving thought to the monumental [MESSAGE TRUNCATED]**

### **RE: FWD: Repopulation**

**Welcome to Alistair BBS!**

* **MESSAGE: RE: FWD: Repopulation**
* **MESSAGE: RE: RE: FWD: Repopulation**
* **MESSAGE: RE: RE: RE: FWD: Repopulation**
* **Quit**

#### **MESSAGE: RE: FWD: Repopulation**

**From: paut.ca1**

**To: all.ca1**

**Subject: RE: FWD: Repopulation**

**Dear Doctors Nassim, Nester, and Ables.**

**It is with great interest I read your messages regarding repopulation, helpfully provided to the entire facility by an anonymous staff member. It seems as though we're living through the Holocene extinction! I, for one, am extremely excited at the prospect. We find ourselves in an unprecedented situation as scientists. Well, I suppose for some of us, such as Dr. Ables, being a dullard stuck underground for the rest of his natural life is actually fairly routine.**

**However, our present predicament presents us with numerous exciting research possibilities. I propose we adjust our endpoints and aim not simply to preserve human life, but to preserve and promote ALL life. Biodiversity will be key in the world to come, and we should be acutely aware of the founder effect inherent to any of our progeny.**

**I know not what those who follow in our wake will look like, but I can only presume they will be great scientists.**

**Anyway, as I was saying, preservation of biodiversity is key for us, for our children, for our children's children. An adult human is estimated to be composed of 10^13 eukaryotic animal cells (though deductions need to be made in the case of Dr. Ables, owing to his anencephaly), however the human body can be host to 10^14 microbial cells (Savage, 1977), many of which reside in the gut.**

**It is our duty and responsibility to recognize that the environment that shapes man is not so much the distinct, abstract concept of a merely external world to which we react like animals, but a complex to which we are inextricably linked.**

**It is our solemn duty to protect all life within this facility. As such, I have stopped flushing the toilet, and ask that you do the same.**

**Warm regards,**

**Dr. P. Terwilliger**

#### **MESSAGE: RE: RE: FWD: Repopulation**

**From: rica.ca1**

**To: paut.ca1**

**Subject: RE: RE: FWD: Repopulation**

**You're a real asshole, Paul.**

#### **MESSAGE: RE: RE: RE: FWD: Repopulation**

**From: paut.ca1**

**To: rica.ca1**

**Subject: RE: RE: RE: FWD: Repopulation**

**Dear Richard,**

**I'm glad, despite all that has happened, that you are still able to communicate on friendly terms. To me, this is simply wonderful.**

**To keep you up to date on my repopulation efforts today, the powdered food rations have reduced my bowel mobility to such a degree that any food bolus travels so slowly and deliberately through my GI tract as to conform to the contours of my intestines. As such, today's offering resembles small, curled brown prawns. Should you wish to examine the raw data of this research project, it can be found in the floor 3 bathroom underneath the paper sign that says:**

**Richard Able's Brains**

 **|**

 **|**

 **|**

 **\|/**

**Warm regards,**

**Dr. P. Terwilliger**

* **You're a real asshole, Paul.**

### **WGHERE GUCKER PAUL**

**Welcome to Alistair BBS!**

* **MESSAGE: WGHERE GUCKER PAUL**
* **MESSAGE: Re: WGHERE GUCKER PAUL**
* **MESSAGE: Re: WGHERE GUCKER PAUL**
* **MESSAGE: Re: WGHERE GUCKER PAUL**
* **MESSAGE: Re: WGHERE GUCKER PAUL**
* **MESSAGE: Re: WGHERE GUCKER PAUL**
* **Quit**

#### **MESSAGE: WGHERE GUCKER PAUL**

**From: rica.ca1**

**To: all.ca1**

**Subject: WGHERE GUCKER PAUL**

**PAUl; stupid ass Whole paul where is PAUL WHERE IS HE**

**rongith twidcreI AM BIGGER NOW'''' I HGAVE A PROGECT FOR YOU GETTING YOUR ASS KICKed by me**

#### **MESSAGE: Re: WGHERE GUCKER PAUL**

**From: paut.ca1**

**To: all.ca1**

**Re: WGHERE GUCKER PAUL**

**ooj,,,,,,,**

**,,,,,**

**,----- KNOW HTIS!!! IN THE TOILET! FIGHT ME PUNKFIGHT ME PUNK**

**FIGHT ME PUNK.FIGHT ME PUNK**

#### **MESSAGE: Re: WGHERE GUCKER PAUL**

**From: rica.ca1**

**To: all.ca1**

**Re: WGHERE GUCKER PAUL**

**NOT IN THE TOILET; k;lI WENT TO TOILET. COWARD> TOIELT COWARD**

#### **MESSAGE: Re: WGHERE GUCKER PAUL**

**From: paut.ca1**

**To: all.ca1**

**Re: WGHERE GUCKER PAUL**

**THER ALL DAY--=ALL DAY2m GOIG BACK TI Toilet toilert now FIGHT YOU IN THE TOILET,**

#### **MESSAGE: Re: WGHERE GUCKER PAUL**

**From: rica.ca1**

**To: all.ca1**

**Re: WGHERE GUCKER PAUL**

**KUf j jjjjjj LIARlllSCARED COWARD. NOT THERE TO THE THOILET PUT MY HAN**

**HANDS IN THE TOILET**

**MAKE SURE**

**NOT IN THE WATER.. WASNT YOU'' DARKER. SMELLYER**

**DIDNT PUT UP MUCH FIGHT. EASY WIN**

#### **MESSAGE: Re: WGHERE GUCKER PAUL**

**From: paut.ca1**

**To: all.ca1**

**Re: WGHERE GUCKER PAUL**

**99999MENA ROOM OF TOIIELT**

**NOT INSIDE TOILET**

**GOING BACK DNOW,, PULL YOUR HEAD OFF**

### **YUM**

**Welcome to Alistair BBS!**

* **MESSAGE: YUM [ATTACHMENT]**
* **Quit**

#### **MESSAGE: YUM [ATTACHMENT]**

**From: wile.ca1**

**To: all.ca1**

**Subject: YUM**

**PIZA IS GOOD BUT MANY PIZA IS BETTER!!!!!!111**

* **Download attachment**
* **Back**