A Very Safe Position

This is the thirty-fifth episode of SAYER, and the seventh episode of Season Three.

## Synopsis

Quarterly review week is upon us: that magical time when all your hard work, determination, and tireless contribution to humanity is boiled down to a single integer and judged lacking.

## Further Information

SAYER contacts Resident Nelson to provide guidance for their first day as a Tier 2 Research Overseer. To this end, it directs them to Floor 1 to board a shuttle to a special facility adjacent to Halcyon Tower. Because they are transferring to a new position in the midst of the quarterly review process, SAYER assures that Ærolith Dynamics does not assume that Resident Nelson will be fully competent immediately; instead, as long as they follow protocol and do not make any major mistakes, it says that their review should be fine.

As Resident Nelson takes the elevator to board the transport, SAYER attempts to impress on them the value of research overseers. It characterizes this new position as one tasked with making decisions for the good of the greater picture, which the people directly involved might be too cowardly to make for themselves. It also says that this is one of the safest positions on Typhon. When the overhead speaker of the shuttle announces that its next stop will be Research Facility Zeta, SAYER reiterates this point. It says that it understands Research Facility Zeta's reputation, but that the truth is "somewhat less awe-inspiring."

When the shuttle opens and Resident Nelson enters the facility, SAYER directs it toward a large door which most other residents are avoiding. It claims that these doors are never locked, and that no one has ever attempted an unauthorized entry of the holding pens beyond. Once inside, SAYER leads Resident Nelson up a stairwell onto a second floor, where catwalks extend over the pens below so that overseers can see the researchers. Each of the pens have a sealed chamber which acts as its only means of ingress or egress, and which can be depressurized with the push of a button. While SAYER says that the creatures inside the holding pens are none of Resident Nelson's concern, it explains that their job today will be to keep time; researchers are only afforded a certain amount of time in any given pen before they are potentially compromised in some way. In the case that they take too long, it will be Resident Nelson's task to depressurize the chamber. While this is well within the grasp of an artificial intelligence, SAYER explains that it is a task left to humans because some members of Ærolith management have advocated for the value of human insight where grey areas arise.

While Resident Nelson walks above the holding pens, an alarm sounds to signal that one of the caretakers has failed to meet the timing code for the pen he was attending. Pen F11, SAYER explains, allows researchers to be inside for 64 seconds, and this one was inside for 64.002 seconds. It says that this is a "grey area" because protocol suggests that all timing codes be rounded to the nearest integer (and that by that standard, the researcher did fulfill the time requirement), but that chambers are automatically sealed when the time expires (and that by the strictest application, the researcher did not fulfill the time requirement). While Resident Nelson is within their rights to release the caretaker, SAYER points out that this is rare because of the risk to public safety, and that it might also impact their score on the quarterly review.

As Resident Nelson hesitates, SAYER posits that they are perhaps concerned about killing an innocent person and assures them that the caretaker in question would depressurize the chamber immediately if the roles were reversed. Additionally, it points out that the caretaker is not even good at his job and that this event will look bad on *his* quarterly review--and that it may be more merciful to just kill him, in that light. With this urging, Resident Nelson does press the button to depressurize the chamber, which SAYER praises. However, it adds, it took them too long to reach this decision and it is evident that they are not a good fit for this overseer position after all. On that note, SAYER explains that the caretaker whose sealed chamber Resident Nelson has depressurized was the previous overseer, who enjoyed the job too much--but now, his position as caretaker is open and Resident Nelson has been reassigned there.

## Alerts

A series of alerts are issued regarding the ongoing quarterly performance evaluations, as well as the death of Sergeant Squiddlesquirt:

* A reminder is issued that quarterly Review time is at hand, and that all residents will have their performance evaluated and summed up as a single number. Residents who feel that an employee's total worth cannot be expressed in this way are reminded that they simply have not tried hard enough.
* As a motivational instrument, SAYER shares an anecdote about Resident Dayes, an Aegis Tower maintenance worker who has already been evaluated for the quarter. In response to a ruptured water pipe, he quickly and efficiently shut off the main valve and repaired the issue while also looking for the cause--however, because he shut off the water at the main valve instead of locally, the pH balance of freshwater aquarium belonging to a valued tower security trainer was disrupted, causing the death of an *iriatherina werneri* or threadfin rainbowfish. Resident Dayes was posthumously evaluated as a 4.
* A notice is issued that all evening recreation activities are canceled so that residents may reflect on their performance. Residents who finish this reflection early are asked to mourn Sergeant Squiddlesquirt, the threadfin rainbowfish whose life was lost due to carelessness. An ongoing memorial service will be held throughout the next day, culminating in Sergeant Squiddlesquirt's launch into space, in a ceremonial pine capsule.
* A notice informs residents that, effective immediately, the security training facility located an undisclosed distance from Aegis Tower has been renamed the Sergeant Squiddlesquirt Memorial Training Facility. A formal plaque will be revealed (and subsequently buried) as part of a small ceremony, and residents are asked to be respectful and try not to stare.

## Trivia

* The script indicates that the working title for this episode was "Quarterly Review".
* Resident Nelson previously worked in the Recreation Department.
* The protocol which SAYER cites that states that all timing codes should be rounded to the nearest integer in from Protocol Manual 27, Section E, Subsection 3.

## Credits

SAYER is voiced and produced by Adam Bash, who also wrote this episode.

Intro and outro music composed by Jesse “Main Finger” Gregory.

Additional music by Kai Engel.

Listen to the episode here.