Matiplica

Matiplica is a popular concoction whose creator remains unknown. Matiplica is one of the few recipes shared throughout both the Ayweniverse and the Ombaverse.

## About

Matiplica is an ancient alcoholic delicacy shared all around the world and enjoyed by all. It is produced by mixing a wide range of ingredients together. If combined incorrectly, the results can be catastrophic. Several incidents of failed matiplica have occurred, all of which resulted in a tragic loss of life.

Matiplica is served in buckets and is commonly available in your local supermarket's basement. Its surface is incredibly reflective, and looks similar to mercury.

Long ago, matiplica was an rare and unknown drink. It gained short-term popularity for some time, before eventually falling off into obscurity around three decades after the making. Once the recipe had been long forgotten, esteemed explorer Orlentine F. discovered an aged piece of paper containing the ingredients, located within Pyromagmate. However, some ingredients were missing, forcing Orlentine to make a replacement for them.

Matiplica is not the original name of the recipe. All previous iterations have been lost to time.

## Ingredients

* 2 unsweetened fungal growths (finely groomed spores) 1 roll of tape ¾ cup of diesel 3 sharpened lead rods 1½ plutonium orbs (12 degrees kelvin) 2 baskets of chlorine ½ cup of benzene 1 grain of sand (place gently on plutonium orb) 8 ounces of strawberry juice mixed with fried kiwis (use air fryer) 2 crushed green crayons ¾ hyphae strings ¼ cup chitin 10 cups of yeast help from an expert 3 ale-drinking enzymes 4 ounces mold ½ vespine venom 2 cups muriatic acid 1½ blood sacrifice 3 drops of vegetable tar 1 delicate pour of vodka 2 atoms dust from the pyramids of giza (avoid placing them on the yeast) ¾ barrel of nuclear waste ¼ sphegina collicola wings 3 cups of molten gumweed petals 1 very small dog house, about the size of a microscopic isopod (findable in your local walmart) the ritual 3 drops of glue 63 music notes ½ white blood cell

## Steps

Use a geiger counter to detect if you have the correct ingredients. If it breaks, you are ready to begin cooking. If a yellow light is visible underneath the screen, evacuate the country immediately.

Step 1. In a pot fitted with supercooled protection, pour the liquid. Combine the liquid with a mystical tree branch until the pot begins to glow. Consult the Anarchist's Cookbook for alternate instructions.

Step 2. Repeatedly slap the solution with an interval of three seconds.

Step 3. Bring the bucket into a controlled environment and disperse uranium fuel rods sporadically around the mixture. Add three drops of glue.

Step 4. Swiftly change containers. Put the new pot on a chair outside and fling milk at it in a cycle for ten minutes. Wash your hands afterwards.

Step 5. Put it on a Ferris wheel for an uncountable amount of time.

Step 6. Arson.

Place the mixture in a paint shaker on a low setting until the walls crumble around you.

Sacrifice France to the solution.

Using a hose fitted with the supercooling pigsnout attachment, pour a steady stream of snow into the substance for 2 minutes.

## Trivia

The first matiplica recipe was much longer and more time-consuming than its current form. The original recipe required:

A pinch of salt. After adding, dispense the contents onto a blackboard or chalkboard.

Sprinkle in a few pieces of paper from the back of some old books.

Next, smash up the remains into a fine powder using a hammer and a sledgehammer.

Distribute the powder evenly over the walls of a large room.

Invite several people to sit inside the room and eat pizza for six hours. Once done, deposit the leftovers in a small box and slap them against the walls.

Continuing with the making process, you will then need to add the following items:

3 gallons of water

1/16th of a ton of platinum

1 gallon of formaldehyde

1 cup of quicksand

1 drop of the tears of the virgin mary

1 handful of ants

1 burning meteor

1 piece of metal string

1 speckled mushroom

1 tiny eggplant

1 glass of grape juice

1 cigarette butt

1 bottle of methylamine

1 lump of coal

1 can of lye

1 cup of peanut butter

A microwave oven

A large amount of hair gel

a live mouse

1 flatulent unicorn

1 goat's blood

a brick of gold

a piece of red clay

1 inch of smoke

1 teaspoon of sugar

1 gallon of gasoline

1 shot of tequila

1 small kitten

1 mouthful of vomit

1 blade of grass

1 jar of pickle juice

1 bag of coins

2 pieces of chalk

A box of Cheez Doodles

The recipe was redone several times since then.