D0m Girlfriend Puts You In Your Place

## Transcript

Darling? Darling? What on earth is that? Oh, for fuck's sake. Darling? Angel. My love. What on earth is that racket? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I see. Well I'm about to get a headache for a fortnight. What? Darling, I- I don't know what those words mean. You're in my bad books just let me make the Fortnite joke. I have had a very long day dealing with idiots who I am simply not allowed to discipline in the same way I do with you, and here I was like an utter fool, expecting to return to my tranquil yet cursed home, and instead I am greeted with what looks like the woodshed scene from Congo.

What is all this mess in my living room? Shopping? Yes, that was quite apparent my love but I think we both know the problem here. No? Well, firstly, in case you had forgotten, did I say you could purchase such an egregious amount of things? Or any at all for that matter? Secondly, you know very well that I should never have to come home to mess. I don't expect you to become a cleaner, but good Lord. I'm your mommy, not your mother.

They shouldn't ??? Why are you lacking so shocked? What is that expression on your dumb little face? Hmm? Surely you've not forgotten your place, darling? Oh dear. What a silly little baby boy you are. I suppose some re-education is in order then. Frstly, turn all that nonsense off. You know I can't stand the sight of bright colors, and I want your undivided attention.

Come here. Kneel. Good lord, where have I gone wrong with you? Why am I having to ask? Are you quite content on your own, my love? It doesn't seem you have much interest in being owned anymore. Oh? Hmm. How peculiar. Well, if it's not the case then I suppose he had better listen very carefully. ??? When I tell you to do something, you're going to do it. For example, you're going to eat when I tell you to eat, you're going to drink when I tell you to drink, and you're going to sleep when I tell you to sleep, because that's how good baby boys behave.

If you could manage all that on your own, then... well we wouldn't be in this position, would we? So when I say you need to get off the computer to eat a meal, you're going to do it. When I say you need to go to bed because you have a busy day the next day, you're not going to stay up until 2am. You're going to go to fucking bed, aren't you? And that's when you say yes. Good. You're not terribly bright, are you baby? But that's all right.

That's what I'm here for, to think for you. Additionally there are some tasks you will have to remember how to do on your own, and without me asking. I never want to touch a fucking door. When you're with me, you're going to do what you're good for: opening doors, carrying my shopping, being my errand dog, and pouring me crisp still mineral water, if it's the last thing you ever fucking do.

Understood? Yes. Has that sunk in darling? Do you remember all these things I told you last year now? I hope all that thinking's not hurting your brain too much, puppy. Do you think you can manage, storing all that away in your dumb baby brain? Hmm? Good. Good job, baby. Come a Little closer. Closer. Mm-hmm. I'll let you off with that as a warning this time. Let's not have a repeat performance of this, darling. Ever.

What? A kiss? Oh, the baby wants a kiss! You'd be lucky to kiss my shoes today, my love. Maybe tomorrow. Now, get up. You're going to come and sit on the sofa like a good dog. I dread to think you've been sat at your desk, so you're going to drink this liter bottle of water. Afterwards, you're going to tidy up, and if you're really good and do it properly, I may even let you sit and eat dinner at the table with me. Understood? Good. I'm very glad, baby. Drink up.