Tim Gettys

Timothy Gettys, AKA The Second-Best Baby Blues in San Francisco, AKA Forbes' 30 Under 30, AKA The Pure One, is one of the founders of Kinda Funny, and hype incarnate - literally.

## Elemental Origins

In the beginning, there were four elements: calmness, disappointment, aggravation, and hype. Powerful, and ever-present in all facets of life, the four elements existed in incorporeal form for centuries, subtly guiding the course of human evolution - until one day, a sinister warlock named Karakakash attempted to harness the elements for himself. Using an arcane combination of voodoo and Atlantian technology, Karakakash attempted to transfer the elements into four rings fashioned from the bones of 500 shoutcasters that had died of heartbreak after a disappointing Nintendo Direct, believing that wearing the rings would allow him to utterly control the elements.

The moment the warlock put the rings on, however, the elements’ energies ravaged his body. Fearing for his life, Karakakash quickly cast a spell that split himself - and his elemental powers - into four separate individuals, hoping that they would work together to figure out a way to contain all of their elements in one body, and then reform themselves back into one. After coming into being, however, the individual that contained the element of aggravation became upset that Karakakash had left them nothing but Lacroix in his fridge, and stormed out.

Eventually, the four individuals died of old age, and the elements were seemingly lost - until 1000 years later, when a solar eclipse exactly 69,000 days before Sony’s E3 2016 press conference triggered an electromagical power surge, and caused the elements to be reborn as four new human beings.

The human being that hype was reborn as was Tim Gettys.

## Early Life

Tim knew from a young age that he was...different somehow, from the other children around him. In addition to constantly being surrounded by a blinding blue light, and crackling with crimson electricity, Tim noticed early on that he was the only person in his friend group that got really excited when tantalizing movie or video game news would come to light. When Wizard magazine would host an interview with Menahem Golan and Yoram Globus about their upcoming Spider-Man film, or Shigeru Miyamoto would reveal a new Yoshi color, Tim would quake his shoes with abject excitement, while everyone else around him would shrug uncaringly.

It was only after Tim met Kevin that he came to understand who he was. After going 50 times to see the trailer for The Phantom Menace that played before Meet Joe Black, Kevin remarked, "I don't get it, Tim; you're such a lovable guy, and your eyes are as blue as the blinding light around you, but why are you so excited about everything? Are you the embodiment of hype, or something?" *Oh my god, Kevin's right!* though Tim. *What else would explain my fascination with learning about Golan and Globus' unproduced Super-Man movie, or learning that there's going to be a charcoal-colored Yoshi in Yoshi's Story? I must be the physical embodiment hype, reincarnated after a millenia of slumber after a warlock attempted vainly to gain its powers using rings fashioned from the bones of 500 shoutcasters that had died of heartbreak after a disappointing Nintendo Direct. It all makes sense now!*

Tim Gettys was finally at peace with who he was - but unfortunately, trouble was brewing.

## War of the Elements

While Tim was busy watching the opening trailers of Meet Joe Black, the human being that the element of disappointment had been reborn as was preparing to go to war. He was envious of Tim's shining, blue eyes, and wanted to claim them for himself - no matter the cost.

When the embodiment of disappointment finally approached Tim at his homestead to claim his eyes, however, he discovered that he wasn't the only person interested in the pure one's peepers: the reborn embodiments of calmness and aggravation were too, and they were ready to throw down if they couldn't get what they wanted. A terrible, destructive battle broke out in the streets of San Francisco; blazing fires razed houses to ashes, thunder and lighting pockmarked the earth, and little johnny accidentally dropped his hot dog on the ground, causing his step-father much embarrassment.

In the end, however, Tim was able to get the upper hand when he realized that he could go beyond his Super Hypan Level 3 form, and transcend to Super Hypan Level 4. Upon assuming this form, the other three elements focused all of their powers on their blue-eyed adversary, fearful that his newfound strength would prove too great to overcome. Their fears were proven correct: Tim brushed off the assault like it was nothing, and then unleashed a devastating salvo of hype-infused plasma on his attackers. The embodiments of disappointment, aggravation, and calmness were atomized, and the war was over. (And little Johnny's step-dad was forced to buy another hot dog).

## Kinda Funny

After the War of the Elements, Tim Gettys roamed the world, in search of solace. How could the other elements, which had once co-existed in unity alongside hype, turn so vile? And would they manifest as human beings once more? These thoughts beguiled Tim wherever he went, and eventually, drove him to return to San Francisco, where he briefly worked as a coffee shop barista, and IGN's Mass Effect 3 Disc-Retrieval Expert.

Eventually, Tim left IGN to form Kinda Funny with Greg, Colin, and Nick, and has worked there ever since. It remains to be seen whether or not the other elements will some day re-emerge - but Tim is confident that the friendships that he's built over the years at his company will be more than able to defeat them if they do. (And if all else fails, he's pretty certain that the expired milk carton Milk Kevin put in his fridge a couple of weeks ago will be able to ward them off with it's smell alone).