Episode 380 - Sky Pirate Delight

Now we bone heroes need to talk to the right bone people to get a proper bone match. I swear, all these bone card battles are just a politics game I swear.

## **Story**

### Long Story

First thing in the morning, Lahni and Lanni/Lonny/The Sorrowful Man run off to meet with the "Commission", the party responsible for scheduling Bones fights. Tonight is Bone Blast 42, and they need to figure out what they are going to do until then. Zipper arrives and gives them breakfast, delicious croissant rolls. Toby asks him about a Zoo, an area with powerful monsters to look at. Venduria has one! It's attached to a Sky Mall, which Dodge Grabbit will be doing a signing at later today. Also, it turns out they should have been paying all of these escorts. Whoops. Toby gives Zipper 3 gold.

As they walk, Toby begins getting suspicious of Rowan, claiming that she never takes her Oathbow out unless she has to, almost as if she stole it. Also, she's dodging questions about her father, whom Toby realizes she's never talked about. As the party is mounting their nimbus-cloud things, they're approached by a... we'll call him a strange character. His name is David Allen Conan, and he's wearing a large floppy hat, and the most interesting beard you've ever seen. Also, long spangly robes, hands of a Rakshasa, and spiral eyes that go different directions. Yeah, this is all just to fuck with Gaelen on Twitter, who draws a lot of these characters. DAC a merchant, who's meeting a friend nearby. This friend is Benice Murphy, which is a human-shaped pile of spiders, wearing an ascot, a Steak N Shake hat, and dishwasher gloves. They're also both wearing paisley. This is cruel and unusual. Also, I write these articles as I listen for the first time, so after writing all of the above, Michael requested these characters in the Wiki, and I'm here to say *I'm way ahead of you, Michael.* Also, the image of Gaelen's many many characters image that was referenced can be found here: Image. This is absolute mad lad energy, and the effort should be wildly supported. Also, it's a great indication of the amazing community that this show fosters! It's great!

Zipper is growing ever impatient, so he scoots everyone along to meet with Dodge Grabbit. The Sky Mall is a large, open-air shopping experience. Any kind of shop you could imagine is here, including, ~~Claire's~~ Glaire's, ~~Hot Topic~~ Cold Topic, ~~Spencer's~~ Sponcer's, Uncle Anne's, Dippin' Spheres, Game Go, Coal's, Grapefruit Julius, etc. Also, the Sunglass Yurt (suggested by bigozcountry in the Twitch chat) The mall is also populated with teens, as one would suspect, but they're all bird teens. In the center of the mall, a crowd is gathering around a table with a painting of Dodge Grabbit on it. Toby bribes the crowd with egg rolls to get to the front, while Rowan walks around gathering Teriyaki chicken samples. It's weird that Dodge has built up such a reputation so quickly, considering they last saw him 36 episodes ago. Soon, Dodge arrives, waving to the crowd. He's met with both cheers, and boos, weirdly. Even more weird is the harpoon that shoots out from one of the airships above. It strikes Dodge's leg, and zips him up into the air! There's a Paul Blart type that tries to save him, but he gets "blown up by a canon, or something."

Toby broom flies up to save him, and the others have a crisis to decide if they even want to help this guy. Ultimately, Rowan decides to stay behind, as does Skud, who really can't see a reason to save this guy, since he's the competition. Seems Skud doesn't really care about the fact that Skud gave them the Bone cards when they last met. That was a nice thing to do. Whatever.

Toby uses *Haste* to make himself faster, and ties himself to the broom, because that will make him pass out for 6 seconds in 1 minute. He is able to catch up with the airship, which is filled with Githyanki. Is this Junpei's crew? There's also a strange, utra-dark sphere in the middle of the deck. Tim remembers the orb that moved the city of Nareev way back when. Dodge is being held by a pirate, arms behind his back. Another Githyanki, the biggest meanest one, drops one of his Bone cards into the sphere, and it's annihilated! Toby leaps into action, commanding them to release the boy! And of course, this sparks a fight. What follows is, arguably, the most difficult to track damage encounter ever performed on this show. There are so many characters rolling so many different types of damage. There are also some retconns, where damage was supposed to happen, but didn't until later. It's really difficult to keep track of, but I've done my best down in the rolls section below.

Toby turns into an Imix, and also summons 3 Fire Elementals. All of this fire makes short work of the 6 Githyanki Pirates, with the final 2 using a *Dimension Door* to run away. During the fight, Toby had freed Dodge and sent him on his Broom of Flying back down to the others. Now, he turns into a Water Elemental and puts out the many, many fires.

Rowan and Skud, who've been vibing down in the mall, enjoy pizza and Dippin' Dots (which were invented by Chilli Manilli, btw), are suddenly met by a wounded Dodge Grabbit on Toby's broom. Skud gets the harpoon out, and stops the bleeding, but Dodge is unconscious. Skud uses some pepperoni as a bandage. Rowan hops up to the airship, bringing the broom with her, to see Toby in the shape of the Elder Brain, and using his many tentacles to control the ship. Together, they land the airship. It's named *Bloody Talon Shrieker (BTS)*, and Toby decides that they are commandeering this one, as well. But first, he turns into a giant eagle and finds the remaining two Githyanki Pirates. He attacks them, as an Elder Brain again, but doesn't kill them. Instead, he brings them back to the ship to question them on how to fly.

### Short

Lahni and her brother run off to get the team a fight with Fuckin Gary. Meanwhile, the rest of the party are led to the bikes by Zipper, where they meet the two most important characters in the history of the show, David Allen Conan, and Benice Murphy. These two are promptly ignored as the gange flies up to the Sky Mall, where the watch Dodge Grabbit get kidnapped by some Githyanki Pirates. Being the only good member of the party, Toby flies up to save him while Rowan and Skud wait down below. Toby is able to rescue Dodge by turning into an Imix and burning a bunch of pirates to death. He leaves 2 alive, so that he can question them on how to fly their airship, which he also steals.

## **Trivia**

* The Elemental Tramway is now called the Interplanar Train Station
* Everyone in the city is dressed in white, but the mall goths are dressed in a light grey, which is just, like, so edgy, dude, oh my god.
* Rowan liked to hang out in the mall back in the day
* Toby references the time they liberated an entire city
* Toby was, in the beginning Neutral Good, and has now become Chaotic Good
* Toby turns into an Imix, which they've fought before
* The other name for the BTS was Butt Toot Surprise
* Toby wants to see if they can reverse the Sphere of Annihilation, and get Dodge's cards back

## **In This Episode...**

### **Cast and Player Characters**

* Michael DiMauro - *Dungeon Master*
* Tim Lanning - Toby Treacletart
* Jennifer Cheek - Rowan Grey
* Mike Bachmann - Skud Derringer

### **Non-Player Characters**

* Zipper
* David Allen Conan
* Benice Murphy
* Dodge Grabbit

### **Locations**

* The Elemental Plane of Air
	+ Venduria
		- The White Flounder
		- The Sky Mall
		- The *Bloody Talon Shrieker (BTS)*

### **Quest Log Updates**

* [On-Hold] - Stop Tiamat!
* [Active] - Destroy The Orb!
	+ [Active] - Find the first missing piece
		- [Active] - Gain access to the Elite Forge
			* [On Hold] - Defeat Lucious Incendous, Master of the Fire Plane
			* [Active] - Defeat Fuckin Gary, Master of the Air Plane
	+ [On-Hold] - Find the third missing piece
		- [On-Hold] - Investigate the final location
* [On-Hold] - Find Adira Harper
* [On-Hold] - Return to Catherine Beanlord's graveyard in The Elemental Plane of Earth get the body of Tuck Frump
* [Active][Jaeludra] - Investigate the Great Colosseum in Caer

### **Quotes**

**"Rowan is a walking pair of JNCO Jeans"** ~ *Tim Lanning*

## **Rolls**

* **Recap**
	+ **Tim - 17**
	+ Jennifer - 9
	+ Bachmann - 11

* **Toby** rolls *Perception* as he flies up to catch Dodge
	+ 13
		- There are a few Githyanki on board

* **Toby** rolls *Arcana* to see if he knows anything about this Sphere of Annihilation
	+ 29
		- It's just a Sphere of Annihilation, and it's controlled telepathically

*Combat begins vs 6 Githyanki Pirates*

* **Initiative**
	+ Toby - 21
	+ Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 1
	+ Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 2
	+ Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 3
	+ Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 4
	+ Githyanki Pirate (Longsword) 1
	+ Githyanki Pirate (Longsword) 2

*Round One*

* **Toby**
	+ Pulls out a crown of Jade, casts *Shapechange*, turns into an Imix
	+ Moves up to be within the 4 pirates wielding greatswords, and since they are now within 10 feet of him, they take damage
		- 14 fire damage

* **Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 1**
	+ Attacks Toby (Greatsword)
		- 25
			* Hit - 13 slashing + 10 psychic damage
				+ Because they attacked Toby the Imix, they take damage
					- 18 fire damage

* **Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 2**
	+ Attacks Toby (Greatsword)
		- 22
			* Hit - 13 slashing + 10 psychic damage
				+ Because they attacked Toby the Imix, they take damage
					- 18 fire damage
	+ Attacks Toby (Greatsword)
		- 20
			* Hit - 13 slashing + 10 psychic damage
				+ Because they attacked Toby the Imix, they take damage
					- 18 fire damage

* **Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 3**
	+ Attacks Toby (Greatsword)
		- 15
			* Miss
	+ Attacks Toby (Greatsword)
		- 17
			* Hit - 13 slashing + 10 psychic damage
				+ Because they attacked Toby the Imix, they take damage
					- 18 fire damage

* **Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 4**
	+ Attacks Toby (Greatsword)
		- 19
			* Hit - 13 slashing + 10 psychic damage
				+ Because they attacked Toby the Imix, they take damage
					- 18 fire damage
	+ Attacks Toby (Greatsword)
		- 20
			* Hit - 13 slashing + 10 psychic damage
				+ Because they attacked Toby the Imix, they take damage
					- 18 fire damage

* **Githyank Pirate (Longsword) 1**
	+ Casts *Haste* on Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 1

* **Githyank Pirate (Longsword) 2**
	+ Casts *Magic Missile* on Toby {1st Level}
		- 3 damage

*Round Two*

* **Toby**
	+ Creatures within 10 feet take fire damage
		- 26 fire damage
	+ Summons 3 Fire Elementals (Initiative 11)
	+ Casts *Misty Step* to move himself 30 feet back

* **New Initiative**
	+ Toby - 21
	+ Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 1
	+ Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 2
	+ Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 3
	+ Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 4
	+ Githyanki Pirate (Longsword) 1
	+ Githyanki Pirate (Longsword) 2
	+ Fire Elemental 1
	+ Fire Elemental 2
	+ Fire Elemental 3

* **Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 1**
	+ Attacks Fire Elemental 1
		- 27
			* Hit - 13 slashing + 10 psychic damage
				+ Hitting a Fire Elemental deals 5 fire damage to the attacker, so...
					- 5 fire damage
	+ Attacks Fire Elemental 1
		- 16
			* Hit - 13 slashing + 10 psychic damage
				+ Hitting a Fire Elemental deals 5 fire damage to the attacker, so...
					- 5 fire damage
	+ Attacks Fire Elemental 1
		- >16
			* Hit - 13 slashing + 10 psychic damage
				+ Hitting a Fire Elemental deals 5 fire damage to the attacker, so...
					- 5 fire damage

* **Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 2**
	+ Attacks Fire Elemental 1
		- 16
			* Hit - 13 slashing + 10 psychic damage
				+ Hitting a Fire Elemental deals 5 fire damage to the attacker, so...
					- 5 fire damage
	+ Attacks Fire Elemental 1
		- >13
			* Hit - 13 slashing + 10 psychic damage - *Kills It*
				+ Hitting a Fire Elemental deals 5 fire damage to the attacker, so...
					- 5 fire damage

* **Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 3**
	+ Attacks Fire Elemental 2
		- Nat1
			* Miss
	+ Attacks Fire Elemental 2
		- >13
			* Hit - 13 slashing + 10 psychic damage
				+ Hitting a Fire Elemental deals 5 fire damage to the attacker, so...
					- 5 fire damage

* **Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 4**
	+ Attacks Fire Elemental 2
		- >13
			* Hit - 13 slashing + 10 psychic damage
				+ Hitting a Fire Elemental deals 5 fire damage to the attacker, so...
					- 5 fire damage
	+ Attacks Fire Elemental 2
		- >13
			* Hit - 13 slashing + 10 psychic damage
				+ Hitting a Fire Elemental deals 5 fire damage to the attacker, so...
					- 5 fire damage

* **Githyanki Pirate (Longsword) 1**
	+ Casts *Thunderwave* on the last two fire elementals, requiring DC 15 Constitution Saving Throws
		- Fire Elemental 2
			* 11
				+ Fail - 6 thunder damage, pushed 10 feet back
		- Fire Elemental 3
			* 5
				+ Fail - 8 thunder damage, pushed 10 feet back

* **Fire Elemental 2**
	+ Moves forward, dealing 5 fire damage to all the Githyanki Pirates (Greatsword)
		- Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 2 - fucking dies
		- Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 3 - fucking dies
	+ Slashes at Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 4
		- 10
			* Miss
	+ Slashes at Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 4
		- 23
			* Hit - 10 fire damage, and lights on fire

* **Fire Elemental 3**
	+ Slashes at Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 1
		- Nat1
			* Miss
	+ Slashes at Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 1
		- 25
			* Hit - 10 fire damage, and lights on fire

*Round Three*

* **Toby**
	+ Flies above the Githyanki Pirates (Greatsword), dealing 17 fire damage
		- Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 1 - fucking dies
	+ Punch Attacks Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 4
		- ??
			* Miss
	+ Punch Attacks Githyanki Pirate (Greatsword) 4
		- 20
			* Hit - 36 damage - *Kills It*
	+ Casts *Flame Blast* on the harpoon chain
		- 15
			* Hit - breaks it
	+ Commands his flying broom to pick up Dodge
	+ Casts *Flame Blast* on Githyanki Pirate (Longsword) 2
		- 19
			* Hit - 35 fire damage
	+ Flies up away from them

* **Githyanki Pirate (Longsword) 1 & 2**
	+ Cast *Dimension Door* and bounce

*Combat Ends*

* **Rowan** rolls *Perception*
	+ Nat1
		- Some shit's going down in the sky

* **Toby** rolls *Arcana* to use magic to put out the fire
	+ 19
		- He's able to do that

* **Skud** rolls *Medicine* to heal Dodge Grabbit
	+ 26
		- Success - he gets the harpoon out of his leg and stops the bleeding

* **Rowan** casts *Perception* to find the two escaped Githyanki Pirates
	+ 14

* **Toby (as a giant Eagle)** rolls *Perception* to find the two escaped Githyanki Pirates
	+ Nat20
		- He finds a flying dingy rowing away