The Elder Scrolls VI: Such A Bad Boy

**The Elder Scrolls VI: Such A Bad Boy** is a game released in September 27th, 2022 made by Square Penix and Bethesda. People thought the game was gay, and many people got angry because they thought it was gay.

Rated M (for men)

## Story

### Prologue Episode 1: We're Heading Weast

They've been heading weast for so long they couldn't tell if they were going east or weest. Our main characters are: Jack, Amy, Mikef, Supplements, Quardiola, Miboy Francis, and Harmony (the Jaguar).

They got out of the desert they were stuck in for like half a day. Jack dies on the way.

Then you are meeted to your main protagonist: Mikef "the Bad Boy" Bronson. He cried when Jack died because you thought it was your brother, but you didnt know. You finish the chapter by reaching the province of Weinfjords. And now you're bjored.

### Prologue Episode 2: You Find A Woman Then Wife Her Up And Her Names Scarlet

You find a woman in the town of Bjorgonson, and then you wife her up, and her name is Scarlet. She thinks she has red hair but she's actually blond. They have a close bond.

### Chapter 1: Getting a Feel for Things ;)

It's 2 years later, Miboy Francis is dead, no one knows how but he died, he was found dead, before he died. You lost your wife in a horrible incident. She was in a corn field and she got she got rolled over. (This is a cutscene you do not get to play this this is a mission).

and basically you are depressed and you have a beard, a scraggly beard, before you had a cool beard. and you're like super depressed, but you still have your pet jaguar, Harmony got that name but shes not actually a girl shes a guy, you called her Harmony because when you saw her you did a "WaghaWA" like you're voice was harmony and you said "o-oh thats a pretty good harmony", and then because of that you said "that's a good name i'm gonna call you harmony, even after seeing the two lubs of sacks.

And you want to figure out how Miboy Francis died, so you go to the council hall of Bjorgonson and you meet the clan chief Bjorgonson, and you guys decide to talk about how and who Francis was died by.

And then you and Bjorgonson and Harmony go out on adventure cuz you think you know who it is. It's the Evenfjordsons! Guten Taagon.

### Chapter 2: The Fabulous Hudson Hornet

You guys find the bad guys and you kill all of them eventually, but then you see the final boss of Evenfjordsons, you call a casta, he's called casta, and you fight him and you have to kill him with the giant chandelier over his head, you have to shoot it down, you have to do that 3 times. NOTICE: This boss is known as the Fabulous Hudson Hornet.

### Chapter 3: You are Starting to Get Bjored

You kill Harmony, you didn't like his name. You didn't actually kill Harmony it was the bad guy, but he sprayed you with hallucionogenic skunk piss, and the bad guy is Biff Nickel the Dragon, Then you catch a fish and you suck its lips, they call such a bad boy for doing this, you try to give the fish oxygen so it wouldn't breathe. You are searching for the dragon.

### Chapter Fjour: You Touched Slinguini Wrongly

He is now mad and evil boss, you now have th e dragon and the slinguini. You find your friend Supplements broken on the street of horken borken. You tell him you are the search of kill of the Biff Nickel the Dragon, and Supplements says he's trying to kill him too. Why he's trying to kill the dragon is because he can't remember the dragon, you guys eventually find workers for the dragon, you kill the workers, and figure out where he is located but he's a long ways away.

### Chapter Fjive: FRICKIN INTERCEPTION

You and Supplements were on the journey to get to the dragon's lair, far away it is, you guys are intercepted by linguini and his gang of pasta eating munchers, i'd say it's an italian mob, to say the least. The fickle the pickle, and you scared of linguini for this moment, but he says he'll be back. You ask Supplements know about linguini, Supplements says well linguini doesn't like me, and I don't like him, he says linguini got mad at him back in the day for stroking his hair. (sentiently while he was sleeping).

You muddled a puddle now you're dirty and gotta get your fricking clothes cleaned. A dry wash and in fjords.

### Twapter Swix: Buzzy on Beetles

You took the halluconegenics skunk spray again, because a beetle gave it to you, you wanted to see if you weren't allergic to it anymore. Long story stort: you don't know. But you do make exceeding progress and when you wake up from the drug trip you see linguini and Supplements dead.. and you're pissing on them. Then you say, welp the yellow don't come out, you can't be mellow. Then you realise of frick they're dead, and you don't remember any of why they died.

### Chapter 7: You Find Samantha Who's Now Your Ex-Wife Who Could Be Step-in-law Sister

And you see Samantha your high school sweetheart (you've never been to high school), and she says I wouldn't have divorced you if you didn't have 12 men in the house. You defend yourself by saying "We were having a chungo rally!!" then bascially she says you are such a bad boy, but then THE DRAGON ATE HER ALIVE, the dragon came out of nowhere, it's a surprise!!! And you're only half way to it's lair in the Beanfjords. You end the fight on an icebjorg. You critically injure it's linjure. It was diagnosed with severe to strong altertive colitis about a month ago, so it's kinda insensitive.

### Chapter 8: You Are Starting To Smell The Hate

Bjorgonson who's been with you the entire time, says "I might not think you are a good person like you used to be" Bjorgonson leaves and decides to split ways, and decides to head to Whippiegoldbjorg. But you are such a bad boy, so you lace his legs with poison. We don't know if he was died, but we hope he pasted away. Basically, you see the dragon's lair. You stroke your hair and say "i'm such a bad boy". Mikef has a drink over at the bar in Chinatown in the Svenbjorg province. You sing We Can't Stop and cry yourself to sleep.

### Chapter 9: You Found The FRICKIN Dragon Cave

You send a carrier pigeon note to Bjorgonson to come help you in a last ditch effort cuz you're kinda piss scared. you fight like five mini bosses up to the cave, then finally you find the entrance to the main dragon's cave, but there's a guard there it's Dingleton, you knew this guy from the chungo rally back at your house.

You say what's up, he says what's up, you guys talk for a solid 20 minutes but for only 1 minute in game, then he tells you that this dragon definetely did kill Urmiboy Francis, your friend, both your friend. You make a joke and say he could have been my boy frienad ;) But this was deemed unacceptable, nothing happened but it's no it's not good. He let's you in. You then finally fight Biff Nickel the Dragon. The dragon says "what, how, when, why, who, why, how did you get in here?". You can say the voice acting was heavily criticized at this part of the game, because they got Anthony Padilla to do it. (Voice actor Anthony Padilla was attacked due to this.) The boss fight commenses, and it lasts well over 30 minutes, it has 3 different stages in the boss fight, each were praised for being very fun.

The first stage, you stick wedges in between his toe nails while on the ground, you have to stick 3 wedges in his toe nails before he screams out fire and you move onto the next stage.

The second stage, you jump over the fireballs, then get on the dragon and crash him into the ground 3 times, then get off the and kick him in the ze nutsacc.

The final stage, you have to use the wham shlam sword, then you have to hit him the sword around 80-100 times while evading his attacks.

Then he screams and flies to the air and a cutscene plays. Mikef gets FREAKING eaten and dies!!

Most creative directors at the game studio were pissed cuz so much character development was wasted, they fired the director, and they made an epilogue that was dissing him, and they couldn't go back and fix it cuz they didn't know how.

### Epilogue: The Josh Buckley Was Frickin Piss

The epilogue was showing a frame of Miboy Francis with game capture, accordingly canon to the story, they play a diss track on Josh Buckley using an instrumental of Stressed Out by Twenty One Pilots (they bought the rights to the song).

The lyrics are this:

> "I wish you had some better writing that wasn't frick'n piss I wish you had a better face that looked frick'n cool I wish you found a growth potion that made you grew! I wish you didn't have to cry every time you lived I was told when I get older I would have good workers But now I realise that you suck My name's 'Josh Buckley' and I am dumb as a rock My name's 'Josh Buckley' and I am dumb as a rock Wish we could turn back time, to the good old write'n When the writing wasn't frick'n piss, but now you messed up (oh) Wish we could turn back time (oh), to the good old write'n (oh) When the writing wasn't frick'n piss, but now you messed up (oh) We're angery now! Sometimes a jail cell will take you back to when you was young & your smell just really is nasty I'd make a candle out of it if I ever found it Try to sell it, and no one would buy it, except for your mom you'd are a sucky ducky, 'cause you have no balls! Nude, no clothes, Wife no? a stone's throw from a woman we used to roam?.. (wha?) But you always seem to think nothing really matters Out of money loans and bankrupt no-home, we all think your gayer then a gator" ...
>
>

Then the song goes on.

Once the song ends, the credits roll. The ending was received as nothing short of disappointing, but the game is near fetchingly close, to a masterpiece itself, said COO and Director, David R. Almond.

**The End.**