Opening/In a World of My Own

Alice in Wonderland Parodies Studios presents....

Lana Loud in Wonderland

Singers: (Voice-over) **Lana Loud in Wonderland**

Male Singers: (Voice-over) **How do you get to Wonderland?**

Singers: (Voice-over) **Over the hills or underland**

**Or just behind a tree?**

**When clouds go rolling by**

Male Singers: (Voice-over) **They roll away and leave the sky**

Singers: (Voice-over) **Where is the land beyond the eye**

**The people cannot see?**

**Where can it be?**

Male Singers: (Voice-over) **Where do stars go?**

**Where is the crescent moon?**

Female Singers: (Voice-over) **They must be somewhere in the sunny afternoon**

Singers: (Voice-over) **Lana Loud in Wonderland**

Female Singers: (Voice-over) **Where is the path to Wonderland?**

Singers: (Voice-over) **Over the hill or here or there**

**I wonder where**

(*One sunny day in England, there were a lot of activities in the park. Kids were either playing games or fishing in the pond. Sitting in front of a tree was a beautiful woman with big blonde hair, blue eye shadow, and red lipstick, wearing a pink shirt with a white collar and cuffs, purple pants, white earrings, and black low tops.* *She is Rita Loud, and she was currently reading a history book)*

Rita: (Reading a book) "....leaders, and head been of late much accustomed to usurpation and conquest. Edwin and Morcar, the earls of Murcia and Northumbria declared for him, and even Stygand...."

(*Rita was cut off when a girl's shoe waved at her face*)

Rita: (Annoyed) Lana!

(*Sitting on a branch was a 7-year-old girl with blonde hair tied in two downward pigtails tied down with red scrunchies, and missing two front teeth, wearing a red baseball cap backwards with a small with a small square hole, white sneakers with blue stripes, and a murky green t-shirt under dark blue overalls. She is Lana Loud, Rita's daughter. Right now, Lori was making a daisy chain rather than listening to Rita. Accompanying her on a branch was a green-colored frog with yellowish-green spots. He is Hops, Lana's pet frog*)

Lana: (Confused) Hmm? (Bored, yet realizing) Oh, I'm listening.

*(As Lana continued making her daisy chain, Rita continued reading)*

Rita: (Reading) "And even Stygand, the archbishop of Canterbury, agreed to meet William and offered him the crown."

(*Meanwhile, Lana placed her completed daisy chain on Hops, making her giggle*)

Rita: (Reading) "William's conquest at first thought it was mo...."

(*She got cut off by Hops, who had just shaken off the daisy chain and onto her head as Lana continued giggling*)

Rita: (Impatiently) Lana!

(*Lana stopped giggling and turned to Rita, who removed the fallen daisy chain from her head*)

Rita: (Impatiently) Will you kindly pay attention to your history lesson?!

Lana: (Apologetically) I'm sorry, Mom, but how can one possibly pay attention to a book with no pictures in it?

Rita: My dear child, there are a great many good books in this world without pictures.

(*Lana simply rolled her eyes*)

Lana: In this world, perhaps.

(*She leaned back against the tree trunk*)

Lana: (Dreamily) But in *my* world, the books would be nothing but pictures.

Rita: Your world? *(Scoffs)* What nonsense. Now....

(*Then an idea sprung in Lana's head*)

Lana: "Nonsense?”

Rita: Once more, from the beginning....

(*Lana picked up Hops and set him on her lap*)

Lori: That's it, Geo! If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense.

(*Geo nodded in agreement with a shrug*)

Lana: Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't.

(*This perplexed Hops, who shook his head in confusion*)

Lana: And contrary wise, what it is, it wouldn't be, and what it wouldn't be, it would. You see?

(*Hops croaked, shaking his head*)

(*Lana jumped down to the ground, and Rita was too busy reading to notice*)

Lana: In my world, you wouldn't say, "Ribbit." You'd say, "Yes, Miss Lana."

(*She curtsies to demonstrate*)

(*Hops croaked, but Lana picks him up as she started to walk away*)

Lana: Oh, but you would. You'd be just like people, Hops, and all the other animals too.

(*Lana put Hops down in a field of flowers*)

Lana: Why, in my world....

(*She begins to sing*)

Lana: **Cats and rabbits**

**Would reside in fancy little houses**

**And be dressed in shoes and hats and trousers**

(*Lana drops a flower on Geo and he moves away from it. Lana lies down in the flower field*)

Lana: **In a world of my own**

**All the flowers**

**Would have very extra special powers**

**They would sit and talk to us for hours**

**When we're lonely in a world of our own**

(*A bluebird lands on a tree branch and begins to chirp as Lana continued singing*)

Lana: **There'd be new birds**

**Lots of nice and friendly howdy-do birds**

(*The bird goes to a small pond and splashes around in it*)

Lana: **Everyone would have a dozen bluebirds**

(*The bird flew back to the branch and dried itself off*)

Lana: **Within that world of my own**

**I could listen to a babbling brook**

**And hear a song that I could understand**

(*Then Lana and Hops lied down on the riverbank as Lana finished the song*)

Lana: **I keep wishing it could be that way**

**Because my world would be a wonderland**

(*As the song ended, Lana dreamily touched a river, and her reflection rippled*)