The Soft Spot

Episode 5: The Soft Spot

*When Dunbar smartens up for a favourite client, Sarah accuses him of actually caring.*

*Gulliver, however, is getting tougher, and fears he's turning into his boss....*

This series is chock-full of throwaway gags and this episode opens with Dunbar consoling a crying woman in the court lobby area. Seeing Gulliver, he joins him at the drinks machine. "Is she OK?", asks Theo, ever-caring Theo. Dunbar tells him that her husband's just been sentenced and that "She's been crying for (checks his watch) 53 minutes". Even Theo gives a wry smile as Dunbar adds, "Eight more minutes and I can bill her for two hours".

Later we see Bruce turn up at the custody suite, looking very smart with a nice tie as well. He's carrying two coffees. Custody Sgt Ross tells him, "You smell different". "I've showered", he replies. He's obviously made a effort, for this is one of his regular clients. She's a prostitute who has given one of her semi-regular customers a little treat, seeing as he's come ito an inheritence and offered her £50 above the usual amount. So she introduced him to "The Love Beads". She then has to explain the purpose of these beads (metal balls on a piece of string, which are meant to give extra pleasure when yanked from the man's bottom where they've been previously pushed). This time though, the client was left in agony and there was blood all over the car seat. Now, about a week after the event, she's been arrested and charged with assault.

She gazes across the table at him and asks, "How you doin' anyway Bruce?". He's flummoxed for a moment as he looks back at her before replying, "Well, can't complain. No bastard would listen if I did". She offers to listen but he reminds her he's the one on the hourly rate, so maybe she should do the talking. It's is obvious that there are mutual feelings here.

Meanwhile Gulliver, who is on duty but earlier failed to get Bruce to take over from him after complaining of being on the go all day and being really tires, now sits with his latest client, an elderly man who sits waffling away about this, that and the other as Theo struggles to keep his eyes open. Afterwards, Gulliver is telling Elaine that he's been with the man for an hour and knows "the names of his grandchildren, the colour of his bedroom walls, his favourite lottery numbers", but has yet to explain to him why he's in custody. "Perverting the course of justice", she tells him. Apparently he reported that a young, black male has entered his flat and, after a struggle, had taken his watch. Police had dashed to the area, even stopping a young, black male who was running. He turned out to be a proffesional athlete in training. Later, CID had studied CCTV tapes from the block of flats and no-one of the description was seen near the place on the night in question. "So it's an insurance claim?", wonders Theo. "Bingo!", she replies, "Which is where he should have been".

Later we see Theo asleep at his desk. Jenny answers his mobile when it rings. When Dunbar arrives he makes a noise that wakes Theo, who is soon asking him to take the old man's case from him. Dunbar wouldn't touch it at all". He looks at the papers, "Perverting the course of justice. How do you pervert something that's already perverted?". Dunbar also suggests that Theo might look to "Cut a few deals", to expidite his workload.

Afterwards, as they walk to court, Theo says he was talking to Custody Sgt Ross who reckons Dunbar has a soft spot for his prostitute client. "Maybe I've got a soft spot for all prostitutes. Maybe I don't see they're doing anything wrong". Their conversation about the righta and wrongs of prostitution are curtailed by a text to Gulliver. When he laughs, Bruce wants to know the joke and eventually Theo explains that when Jenny answered his 'phone and said '"He's asleep", his friend had got the wrong idea. "Oh this friend's a woman then?", asks Bruce. He starts digging for some information from a reluctant Theo who says, "Why should I provide you with more information to take the piss out of me?".

Next we see Gulliver approching Spinky Sutherland to talk about some cases. He spots a game on Spinky's desk and asks, "Is that Battleships?". Dunbar has arrived at the court and sees his client, Maggie, sitting with her pimp. She is sporting several fresh bruises to her face. The pimp towers mancingly over Dunbar as he tells him that the judge will see the irony of someone who's being chrged with assault actually being the victim of an assault. "Irony....".

The pimp goes to fetch a drink ("I see Huggy Bear finally sold the franchise", quips Bruce), Dunbar now advise Maggie to take the case to trial, but she's up admitting guilt and getting out of court and back on the street. She asks won't that make him more money but he tells her that it's not all about the money. He says, "Relax, I'll have you shooting up and sucking cock before you can say 'Consenting sexual injuries' ". That makes her laugh at least.

As Gulliver and Sutherland play Battleships, they reach agreement on a series of cases. Eventually Spinky mentions Theo's elderly client. "Tom Passmore. Perverting the course of justice". "He's 74 years old", argues Theo. "I'll offer Police obstruction, if he pleads guilty", offers Spinky. They agree on this. Finally, Gulliver sinks Sutherland's battleship.

Sarah Beckenham tells Dunbar she'll drop the charge of offensive weapon if his client admits to assault. He says that his client is determined to go to trial, even though he'd tried to talk her out of it!. "What's the actual damage to this guy?", he asks. Sarah shows him photgraphic evidence. "A chronic haemorrhoid shredded to ribbons". Dunbar argues that his client had no prior knowledge of the man's medical condition. The man is a freelance coach driver so now Dunbar twigs that he's after loss of earnings. "The Ctiminal Injuries Compensation Board won't pay out without a guilty verdict", she says.

"Take the assault and everyone's happy", suggests Sarah. "Yeah, except me... I mean, my client", he replies. Sarah now looks at him agog. "Oh my God, you care! You actually care!", she says. "Fuck off!", he replies but the cat's out of the bag. She leaves him standing there, a worrying look of realisation spreading across his face.

Theo greets Tom in the court lobby. He attempts to explain to Tom that he'll face a lesser charge of obstruction if he pleads guilty, but Tom merely asks, "Have they caught him?", as he maintains his story of the stolen 'phone. An increasingly exasperated Theo tries to get Tom to understand what will happen, depending on his plea. However, Tom syas he will say "The truth. A black chappie came in through my front door.". As Gulliver gets the call for the ushers's office he finally loses his rag with Tom and tells him very forcefully that he'll go into court and say "Guilty" and nothing else, nothing about the bus that got him there or special offers at the supermarket.

Next we see Theo in the canteen, telling Dunbar how he shouted at the man. "So what?", shrugs Dunbar. "He's a small, frail, slightly senile old man. I didn't wan to turn in to this sort of lawyer. I didn't want to becom like....", he hesitates and Dunbar continues for him. "You were going to say like me, weren't ya? You're scared you turning into me". He berates Theo for this and tells him if he was really clever he would have let Spinky win their game. Now Theo asks about Dundar's client and begins to wonder why Bruce appears to be going out of his way for this one. Eventually Bruce concedes, "If you must know, it's because she's got manners. I don't care what you do with your life, as long as you've got manners".

Once again we see Bruce attempting to persuade a still-reluctant Maggie to fight the case, arguing that even a minor assault conviction will be on her record. He reminds her that at 28 her life is far from over. "Oh yes," she says, "I could come and live with you for a while, clean up my act, you could buy me nice clothes and introduce me to your family and your friends. It's very sweet of you Bruce, but I'm no Julia Roberts and you're certainly no Richard Gere".

When Theo meets Tom waiting in the lobby he sees that the man has been crying is shame as he has wet himself. Gulliver goes back to Spinky and tells himt hat Tom won't be pleading guilty. Tom thinks he's innocent and, despite Spinky's objections, Theo says he will spin this case out as long as it takes, until tom's dead or spinky has retired.

In court, despite all of Bruce's efforts, Maggie pleads guilty to assault. Sarah is pleased and tells the magistrates that she will accept the lesser plea. Now Dunbar rises to address the magistrates and vouches for her good character, saying she was only guilty of trying to provide something extra for her client, who we see in court sitting on a rubber ring. Dunbar goes on to tell the three (female) magistrates that in other circumstances Maggie could be one of them, or one of them could be her. He suggests that in tat case, Maggie would be better at what they do than they tehemselves are.

Later we see Theo telling Tom that charges have been dropped and he's free to go. "Shame, I were looking forward to going into court. I'd a lot to say. I wonder what I'll do with myself now?" he says as he wanders off.

Outside of the court, Sarah and Bruce see Theo getting into someone's car, leaning in to kiss them as he does so. Dunbar can see just enough to establish it's a woman, "Fully formed and not bad to look at". Sarah, however, is still convinced that Gulliver is gay, being smart, intelligent and polite. Dubar tells her that maybe Theo just isn't interested in her.

In the last scene, Bruce sits in his car in the rain, gazing across at Maggie as she plies her trade on the street corner. Slowly, he straightens his tie and checks his appearance as he appears to be making a move towards her. Suddenly another car pulls up and Maggie gets in, possibly clocking Bruce as she does so.

He sinks his head on the steering wheel, repeating, "Oh fuck!".

Other cast members

Crying Woman... Chrissi-Jo Hyde

Maggie Lancaster... Charlotte Emerson

Tom Passmore... Des Cummings

Ryan (The Pimp)... Emmanuel Ighodaro

Clerk... Alex McQueen