Fat Albert

### Status

In limbo between the real world and the cartoon dimension waiting for the full dimensional merge

> "Why did you make me real? Just to molest me?" ~ Fat Albert
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**Fat Albert** is the star of Bill Cosby's educational children's show *Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids*, which aired from 1972 to 1985. He is a caring individual who enjoys teaching people life lessons. However, according to Chris O'Neill, he has been shown to have a darker side, shown through his quote *"Hey hey hey, rape is okay"* (though this was later retconned to *"Rape is not okay"* for political correctness). This may be due to his abusive relation with Bill Cosby.

## History

As shown in Oney Plays Animated: Life Of Ding Dong, Fat Albert is the herald of death, since he is shown to hold the life of Ding Dong within his palms, shortly before he dies and passes on to the afterlife. This is shortlived however, with the eventual resurrection of Ding Dong due to the special ritual of his species to self-revitalise upon death.

Aside from his relation to the Cosby Kids (often fighting with and getting into conflict with Donald Duck, as shown when Donald accepts the darkness into his heart in the Kingdom Hearts Sega) and Bill Cosby himself, Fat Albert has also been in correspondence with his butler Alfred Pennyworth (who refers to him as *"Master Fat"* or *"Master Albert"*). He also used to bear the Great Keyblade long ago. He and the Cosby Kids would battle the Heartless with their weapons, forged from the metal scraps of trash cans (All except for their fellow friend Mush Mouth, who only questioned everyones livelihoods instead of fighting).

## Theories

There has been alot of debate on whether Fat Albert is meant to be Bill Cosby himself, or Cosby playing the character of Albert. This is due to Bill Cosby morphing into Fat Albert under the effects of the T-Virus in his sexual assault case hearing at court. This was followed by him proclaiming that he was Fat Albert, and that *"I didn't do it, it was Bill!"*. The common consensus is that Bill Cosby was suffering from some rare form of multiple personality disorder that only manifests itself under the influence of the T Virus. This could also explain why both individuals are never seen together at the same time or place, aside from cases where Fat Albert was summoned from the cartoon dimension by Cosby for his own sexual gratification and fulfilment of perverse desires. As a result, it is believed that Fat Albert may actually be two different individuals under the same title. From that, it is believed that Fat Albert from the cartoon dimension is the one who is affiliated to be the herald of death, and not the one who appeared in Bill Cosby's court hearing.

## Quotes

* "Dumb Donald, that's real gay."
* "I've taken shits bigger than you, kid."
* "Hey hey hey, I'm the master of the keyblade."
* "We need to make a keyblade out of trash can."
* "Hey, hey, hey, I'm fat!" *(sung to the tune of Louis Armstrong's What a Wonderful World)*
* "You may be retarded here, but you're not retarded... here." (points to his crotch)
* "Hey, hey, hey, don't get raped!"
* "You're a nobody Dumb Donald."
* "What in the goddamn FUCK!"