101 Animals (101 Dalmatians)

**101 Animals (101 Dalmatians)** is a spoof of 101 Dalmatians (1959/1961).

## Cast:

* Pongo - Cedric (from: Cédric (2001-2012))
* Perdita - Chen Yauping (from: Cédric (2001-2012))
* Roger Radcliffe - Tigger (from: Winnie the Pooh (since 1965), Winnie the Pooh and the Blustery Day (1967), Winnie the Pooh and Tigger Too (1975), The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh (1979), The New Adventures of Winnie the Pooh (1988-1991), Pooh's Grand Adventure (1997), The Tigger Movie (2000), Piglet's Big Movie (2003), Springtime with Roo (2004), Pooh's Heffalump Movie (2005) and Winnie the Pooh (2011))
* Anita Radcliffe - Lola Bunny (from: Looney Tunes (1937; since 1930), Space Jam (1995) and Looney Tunes: Back in Action (2001))
* Nanny (male version) - Bonkers D. Bobcat (from: Bonkers! (1993-1995))
* Cruella De Vil - Maleficent (from: Sleeping Beauty (1959))
* Patch - Berlioz (from: The AristoCats (1970))
* Rolly - Cubbi Gummi (from: Adventures of the Gummi Bears (1985-1991))
* Penny - Olivia Flaversham (from: The Great Mouse Detective (1986))
* Lucky - Boo-Boo Bear (from: Yogi Bear (1958-1959), The Yogi Bear Show (1960-1961), Hey There, It's Yogi Bear! (1963), Yogi's Gang (1970-1971), Yogi's Space Race (1978-1979), Yogi's Treasure Hunt (1985-1986), The New Yogi Bear Show (1988-1989), Yogi's Arabian Nights (1994) and Yogi the Easter Bear (1995))
* Jasper Badun - Wart Pendragon (from: The Sword in the Stone (1963))
* Horace Badun - Cody (from: The Rescuers Down Under (1990))
* Lucy - Miss Bianca (from: The Rescuers (1977) and The Rescuers Down Under (1990))
* Towser - Bernard (from: The Rescuers (1977) and The Rescuers Down Under (1990))
* Sgt. Tibbs - Thomas O'Malley (from: The AristoCats (1970))
* Colonel - Captain Colonel (from: Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers (1989-1990))
* Captain - Colonel Hathi (from: The Jungle Book (1967) and The Jungle Book 2 (2003))
* Collie - Great Prince (from: Bambi (1942) and Bambi II (2006))
* Labrador - Foghorn Leghorn (from: Looney Tunes (1937; since 1930), Space Jam (1995) and Looney Tunes: Back in Action (2001))

## Quotes:

**Maleficent/Cruella De Vil**: *[bursts through the door]* Anita, darling!
**Lola Bunny/Anita Radcliffe**: How're you?
**Maleficent/Cruella**: *[gleefully]* Miserable, darling, as usual. Perfectly wretched!

**Maleficent/Cruella**: When can the [animallings] leave [home]? Two weeks? Three weeks?
**Tigger/Roger Radcliffe**: Never.
**Maleficent/Cruella**: What?
**Tigger/Roger**: *[nervously, but firmly stands his ground]* We're not selling the [animallings]. Not a single one. Do you understand?
**Maleficent/Cruella**: Anita, is he serious? I really don't know Roger.
**Lola Bunny/Anita**: Well, Cruella, he seems...
**Maleficent/Cruella**: Surely he must be joking!
**Tigger/Roger**: *[more firmly]* No, no, no, I mean it. You're not getting one. Not one. And that's...final.
*[Cedric/Pongo nods at Maleficent/Cruella in agreement]*
**Maleficent/Cruella**: Why, you horrid man! You... you... All right. Keep the [tiny] beasts for all I care. *[rips up the check]* Do as you like with them. Drown them! *[throws the pieces of ripped check paper at Tigger/Roger]* But I warn you, Anita, we're through. I'm through with all of you! I'll get even. Just wait. You'll be sorry. You fools! You... **YOU IDIOTS!** *[she slams the door and Cedric/Pongo yells, "YOU'LL NEVER GET ANY SINGLE ONE, YOU BIG OLD WITCH!" at her as she drives away]*

*[As Tigger/Roger and Lola/Anita take Cedric/Pongo and Chen/Perdita for a walk]*
**Wart Pendragon/Jasper Badun**: There they go, Horace, me lad. Out for their evening constitutional. A lovely pair of turtledoves. Around the jolly corner, and off to the park.
**Cody/Horace Badun**: Yeah, but I don't like it, Jasper. One more pinch and they'll throw the keys away.
**Wart Pendragon/Jasper**: Ah, come off it, Horace. We're getting plenty of boodle!
**Cody/Horace**: Yes, but, uhm, I've been thinking--
**Wart Pendragon/Jasper**: *[grabs him angrily]* YOU'VE BEEN *THINKING?!* Now, look 'ere, Horace, I warned you about thinking! I've got the knob for this job, so let's get on with it.

**Bonkers D. Bobcat/Nanny**: Now, who do you suppose...? *[answers the door]*
**Wart Pendragon/Jasper**: Good evening, ma'am. We're here to inspect the wiring and the switches.
**Cody/Horace**: And we're from the gas company.
**Wart Pendragon/Jasper**: *[prods Cody/Horace]* Lectric, lectric.
**Cody/Horace**: Oh. Electric company!
**Bonkers D. Bobcat/Nanny**: Oh, but we didn't call for any inspection.
**Wart Pendragon/Jasper**: Oh yes, I know. See, there's a new Act just passed in Parliament. Comes under the heading of the "Defense of the Realm Act": Article Four, Section 29. Very important - it's the law! And it's for your own safety, ma'am.
**Bonkers D. Bobcat/Nanny**: Well, I don't care what Parliament, Realm or whatever it is says. You're not coming in here, not with the Mister and the Missus gone.
**Wart Pendragon/Jasper**: Oh, now. Come off it, Ducky. We got no time to palaver. We got a job to do. *EXCUSE* ME! *[storms through the door]*
**Bonkers D. Bobcat/Nanny**: What's the matter with you two?! You got cloth ears? I said you're not coming in here! *[falls on his boddom]*
**Wart Pendragon/Jasper**: Ho, ho, ho! [He's] a regular old tauder, ain't [he], Horace? *[laughs mockingly, then heads upstairs]*
**Bonkers D. Bobcat/Nanny**: *[chasing Wart/Jasper]* Don't you dare go up there, you big long-legged lummox! Now I mean it! If you don't get out of this house, I'll call the police, I will. Now be off with you, you big... you big *weasel!*
**Wart Pendragon/Jasper**: Now you've been gone and done it. You've cut me to the quick, lady. Why, I wouldn't stay here if you asked me to. *[Marge/Nanny throws a teapot at Wart/Jasper, but it misses and breaks]* Not even for a cup of tea! *[calling down for Cody/Horace while trapping Marge/Nanny in the addic]* Oi! Horace, me lad! I've got a sneaky suspicion we're not welcome here! *[we see Cody/Horace downstairs with a bag, heading for the animallings/puppies in the kitchen]* Pack up, we're leaving! Sharp's the word, and quick's the action.

*[Wart/Jasper calls Maleficent/Cruella on the phone]*
**Maleficent/Cruella**: Hello? Jasper! Jasper, you idiot! How dare you call here?
**Wart Pendragon/Jasper**: Look, we don't want no more of this 'ere. We want our boodle. *[as Cody/Horace tries to get his attintion]* We'll seddle for half!
**Maleficent/Cruella**: Not one schilling till the job's done. Understand?
**Cody/Horace**: Jasper! *[shows him the morning newspaper]*
**Wart Pendragon/Jasper**: It's right here in the blinkin' paper, pictures and all!
**Maleficent/Cruella**: Hang the papers! It'll be forgotten tomorrow.
**Cody/Horace**: I don't like it, Jasper. I don't--
**Wart Pendragon/Jasper**: Ah, shaddup, you idiot!
**Maleficent/Cruella**: **WHAT?!**
**Wart Pendragon/Jasper**: No, no, not you, miss. I mean Horace here!
**Maleficent/Cruella**: Why, you imbecile! *[slams down the phone]*

**Cedric/Pongo**: Perdy... I'm afraid it's all up to us.
**Chen Yauping/Perdita**: Oh, Pongo. Isn't there any hope?
**Cedric/Pongo**: Well, yes. There's the twilight [howl].
**Chen Yauping/Perdita**: The twilight [howl]? But [Ceddy-pooh], that's only a gossip chain.
**Cedric/Pongo**: Darling, it's the very fastest way to send news. And if our [animallings're] anywhere in the city, the London [cartoons] will know. Now we'll send the word tonight when our pets take us for a walk in the park.

*(Squeaking in the distance)*
**Captain Colonel/Colonel**: Sounds like a number. Three fives are 13.
**Thomas O'Malley/Sgt. Tibbs**: Um, ah, that's 15, sir.
**Captain Colonel/Colonel**: 15? Of course 15!
*(More squeaking)*
**Captain Colonel/Colonel**: Yes, dot, spot, spot, spotted puddings... poodles... No, no, *puddles!*
**Colonel Hathi/Captain**: Puddles, sir?
**Captain Colonel/Colonel**: 15 spotted puddles stolen, oh, *balderdash!*
**Thomas O'Malley/Sgt. Tibbs**: Bedder double-check it, Colonel.
**Captain Colonel/Colonel**: Hmm? Oh, yes, yes, I suppose I better.
*(Captain Colonel/The Colonel trumpets like a real elephant, then squeaking in the distance in response)*
**Captain Colonel/Colonel**: Two [sounds], one [peep] and a [squeak].
**Thomas O'Malley/Sgt. Tibbs**: It sounds like *[animallings],* sir.
**Captain Colonel/Colonel**: Of *course,* [animallings]!

*[An angry Maleficent/Cruella catches Wart/Jasper and Cody/Horace watching television]*
**Maleficent/Cruella**: I've got no time to argue. I tell you it's got to be done tonight. *[switches off the TV]* Do you understand? Tonight!
**Cody/Horace**: But they ain't big enough.
**Wart Pendragon/Jasper**: You couldn't get half a dozen coats out of the whole kaboodle.
**Thomas O'Malley/Tibbs**: *[spies]* Coats?! [Cartoon]-skin coats?
**Maleficent/Cruella**: *[breathes smoke at Wart/Jasper's face, and he coughs]* Then we'll seddle for half a dozen! We can't wait. The police're everywhere. I want the job done tonight!
**Cody/Horace**: How're we gonna do it?
**Maleficent/Cruella**: Any way you like: Poison them, drown them, bash them in the head. You got any chloroform?
**Wart Pendragon/Jasper**: Not a drop.
**Cody/Horace**: And no ether... either.
**Wart Pendragon/Jasper**: *[bonks Cody/Horace on the head with his juicebox]* "*Eye*-ther"!
**Maleficent/Cruella**: I don't care how you kill the [tiny] beasts, but DO IT! AND DO IT NOW!
**Wart Pendragon/Jasper**: Aw, please, miss. Now have [mercy], will ya? Can't we see the rest of the show first?
**Cody/Horace**: We want to see "What's My Crime?"
*[Wart/Jasper starts to drink from his juicebox, but Maleficent/Cruella snatches it and throws it into the fireplace, where the ignited juice causes an explosion. The frightened animallings/puppies hide behind the furniture, and Maleficent/Cruella slaps both Wart/Jasper and Cody/Horace in the face.]*
**Maleficent/Cruella**: Now listen, you idiots! I'll be back first thing in the morning. And the job better be done or I'll... I'll... I'll call the police! ***DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!***
*[She slams the door behind her, causing a chunk of the ceiling to come loose and fall on Cody/Horace's head.]*
**Cody/Horace**: I think she means it, Jasper.
**Wart Pendragon/Jasper**: Ah... we'll get on with it as soon as the show's over. *[switches the TV back on]*

*[Maleficent/Cruella sees footprints on both sides of the snow]*
**Maleficent/Cruella**: Well, now, what have we here? So they thought they can outwit Cruella.
*[She laughs, then honks her car horn four times]*
**Maleficent/Cruella**: Jasper! Horace!
*[Honks her horn again as Wart/Jasper and Cody/Horace arrive and pull over next to Maleficent/Cruella's car]*
**Maleficent/Cruella**: Here's their tracks heading straight for the village.
**Wart Pendragon/Jasper**: Blimey! Oh, it's them, alright.
**Maleficent/Cruella**: Work your way through the south roads. I'll take the main road. See you in Dinsford!
*[Maleficent/Cruella, Wart/Jasper and Cody/Horace split up into two different roads to Dinsford]*

**Cedric/Pongo**: Perdy, I've got an idea! *[puts on a chicken costume]*
**Chen Yauping/Perdita**: Pongo, what on Earth...?
**Cedric/Pongo**: Look! I'm a [chicken]! We'll all [put on chicken costumes]! We'll all be [chickens]!
**Foghorn Leghorn/Labrador**: Say! That's an idea!
**Cedric/Pongo**: Come on, [gang]! [Put on chicken costumes!]
**Olivia Flaversham/Penny**: You mean you want us to get dirty?
**Pepper**: Did you hear that, Freckles? Dad wants us to [disguise ourselves as chickens].
**Cadpig**: Mother, should we?
**Chen Yauping/Perdita**: *[sighs]* Do as your father says.
**Pepper**: This'll be fun!
**Cadpig**: I always wanted to get good and dirty! [They all giggle while they put on chicken costumes]

**Tigger/Roger**: *[after counting the animallings/puppies]* 101!'
**Lola Bunny/Anita**: 101? My, where did they all come from?
**Tigger/Roger**: Oh-ho, Pongo, you ol' rascal!