Keepers of the Accords Wiki

== Welcome Goons! ==
The Moldy Unicorn lies on the top of a hill on the outskirts of the pulsating wastes. It's a bit of a one stop shop out in the boonies and many good Goons treasure its comforts after a long march through whatever forgotten holes were discovered most recently.

The Unicorn's tavern is stocked with choicest imbibery, gourmandantry, and do-pray-tell. The inn is better described as a bunk room, but beds are cheap and a body gets so very tired. Besides, no one visits the Moldy Unicorn for the beds. They come for the Moldy Unicorn Spa Experience.

Tobias, Barnabus, Demitri, Mitz, and Squirrelah meet each year at the Moldy Unicorn for the annual keeping of the Accords, a post-war tradition of feasting in honor of newly found peace.

This year things went... well actually, they went about as expected.

You see, Tobias, they're a wheel-rat turned lock-snipe that tunneled away from the war so they wouldn't have to choose a side.

And Barnabus, he's a lock-snipe too. Tobias' biggest competitor, in fact. Barnabus grew up around books and fertilizer. He ran away from the war, but don't we all run away from some of those things we ought to stand and face?

Then there's Demitri, erudite fella. Mighty fine with a quill and has the words to go with it. Demitri knows how to gather information and put it to good use. Helped win the war and all that, right?

Next there's Mitz. He grew up a desert beggar, but now works cultivating lush greenery. Mitz was conscripted into the war. He learned a lot of lessons carrying that shield. Picked up a few regrets too.

Finally we have Squirrelah. She was one of the desert urchins too. Took to hoarding seeds and nuts, staying hyper vigilant for the critters that came in the night. She's a slab dragger now. Keeps her ears open for rumors while loading, dragging, cooking, and serving her fine finds.

Well, like I say, they all meet at the Moldy Unicorn for the Keeping of the Accords and they got their fresh and goofy goat milk and their spicy pickle juice and their wines and what-nots and this wizard comes in with these animated human skeletons guarding him. Nobody thought anything of it, but apparently that wizard played some kind of trick on everybody and things got weird.

There were these bugs. All different sizes. Some as big as footballs. Some of them, you could fit them in a Mug Club Mug. Y'know the Pub Mug Club's Mugs? Yeah you could catch one of these bugs in a Pub Mug Club's Mug. Anyway, the bugs are filled with this high-test psychedlic/pschetropic mist as a defense mechanism or whatever and so everything got real, real weird.

It was a great party, though. Most folks only remember parts of it. Nobody seems to remember the sacrifice, so the jury is out on whether or not it even happened this time around. There was a fight though. Oh! and they got Philllip drinking again... heh. Maybe he'll come back to poker night. I heard that someone propositioned ol' Doc Gobby to give em an artificial tail. Can you believe that? Somebody was serving somekind of weird milk out of the WC and Tiny the bouncer was giving people piggy back rides for money.

Anyways, that's the way I hear tell of it.

Oh... and watch out for that Tobias. Hear they're a sleep puncher.

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