Ba'ob: Kind

Ba’ob was still clinging to the wolf all the way back to the castle. Goro’d wanted to keep an eye on her. Make sure she stayed okay. Thinking about her body, bleeding, losing her warmth…. Ba’ob agreed. Ba’ob was starting to realize Goro was okay. Like Hansel. Wasn’t as sure about Mishka, but he just made sure to stick close to one of the others and it was… okay. Wolf was limping along, still hurt but okay. It was okay though. Goro saved her once, he could save her again.

Ba’ob started slowing when they got to the castle. Didn’t… want indoors. Couldn’t go too far though— he tugged at Goro’s sleeve to get his attention and then pointed at the pond. “We go there?”

“Uh, sure?” Goro looked confused. And— Ba’ob hesitated. What if— something happened to the wolf. Goro wanted to keep an eye on her. Had to be for a reason. Saw a light go in Goro’s eye. “You want me to come keep an eye on your wolf?” he asked.

Ba’ob ducked his head and chewed his lip. Couldn’t— say yes. Couldn’t ask that. (Azriel, Jasper, Able’d disagree.) But wanted to. He shifted, clasping his hand around his arm behind his back, nails digging in. “It would be appreciated,” he said slowly.

Goro didn’t seem to have anything else to say— after a few seconds Ba’ob practically bolted for the pond. Didn’t jump in, cause he didn’t really feel like it, but sat close enough he could kick his shoes off and stick his feet in. Wolf sat next to him. Goro stayed a little bit away. Was probably good. Ba’ob was still twitchy. Needing to think, about things. Didn’t want to but… thoughts were clamoring around in his head. Too many, needed to sort them out.

The wolf limped over and laid down heavily, her head in Ba’ob’s lap. She was… okay. Her fur was patchy and splotchy with burns, healed but… barely. Ba’ob carefully stroked her head, her ears, avoiding the raw patches. They looked painful. Ba’ob gestured, muttering, calling up the magic in him. Felt the spell take hold.

“You died,” he said to the wolf, elf words.

She opened her eyes, flicking an ear. *I am not dead.*

“But you were,” Ba’ob said. “You came to the fight to protect me and… and you *died*.” He wanted to grab her fur, bury his face in it, but there was too much rawness. She was too hurt.

The wolf sat up and licked his face. *I am not dead. Still here for silly pup. Calm, calm.*

Ba’ob bared his teeth and growled, shoving her away. “You aren’t *listening!* You died! You died and Goro brought you back but what if he hadn’t been— been there.” Ba’ob wiped at his face. It was wet. Crying. “I almost lost you and *you don’t get it*!”

The wolf whined, licking his face again, pushing him down and lying on top of him. *I am not dead. I am here. Here for silly pup. Take care of you, silly pup.*

“But you can’t if your dead,” Ba’ob whispered. Rested his hand on the wolf’s neck, where she wasn’t burned, letting her attempt to comfort him.

A thought was forming and he didn’t like it. Wolf’d been *there* for him first. She’d been by his side for longer than anyone. But Ba’ob wasn’t alone now. He had Azriel, and Jasper, and Abel, and Ombre, and Hansel, and Luci, and… Goro too. Ba’ob had people. He wasn’t an animal. Wolf… was. She was happy, enough, but Ba’ob knew she missed her own kind. Thinking back to being among the wolves, it was more lonely than he’d realized. If he went back now… he wouldn’t be happy.

She would though. It was too far to go back to her pack but Ba’ob still pictured it. Tussling with her pups— her *real* ones— they’d be full-grown by now. Licking and nosing her parents, sniffing at the new additions to the pack. She’d fit. Ba’ob… wouldn’t.

Ba’ob didn’t fit anywhere.

‘Cept that wasn’t true. He did fit, at Azriel’s. Not maybe the way most people did but— he had a *place*. And, when he forgot to be sad, he was even happy there. Ba’ob had a home, and so could the wolf. Just, not the same one.

“You should go,” Ba’ob murmured, gripping tightly to the wolf’s fur. “Back to the others.”

The wolf cocked her head. *Am here for silly pup.*

“I— I know.” Ba’ob took a shuddering breath. “But. I don’t. Need you,” he said haltingly. “I have. Others that look out for me.” The wolf kept watching him, ears perked attentively. “I will be… okay. Without you.” Tears pricked at Ba’ob’s eyes.

*Silly pup is sad.* The wolf licked at his face, at his tears.

“I’ll miss you,” Ba’ob said, and buried his face in her coat. He cried a little, and then pulled back to wipe at his face and turn to Goro. “When she okay?” he asked, his voice hoarse and raw.

Goro stopped looking at the trees, looked back to Ba’ob. “She’s okay now.”

Ba’ob hesitated, glancing back at the wolf. “She… still hurt,” he said slowly.

“Oh, jeeze, I mean, I can heal her.” Goro pulled a stick— *wand*— out and crouched beside the wolf, murmuring and tapping her with it.

She looked better. Much better. Back to herself. Ba’ob hugged her tight, just… taking a second to know she was *there*. Then he glanced up at Goro with one eye. “When she… okay to leave?” he asked haltingly.

“What?” Goro looked confused.

Ba’ob dug his hand in the wolf’s fur a little deeper. “She not needed. Go back to wolves,” he said slowly, trying to not cry again. “When is safe?”

“Uh.” Goro started twisting his wand around in his hands. “I mean uh… She’s safe now. Safe as she ever was.”

Ba’ob nodded slowly. Part of him hoped that wouldn’t have been the answer. That, Ba’ob could have another night, another week, another month with the wolf. But maybe this was better. Make it… a clean break. “Thank you,” he said quietly. Turned back to the wolf, and slowly let go, got up. “You should go,” he said lowly. Wiped his face cause, he was crying again. “Go be with. With your own kind. I’ll. I’ll stay with mine.”

The wolf didn’t say anything at first. Studying Ba’ob with her predator’s eyes. Then, *Silly pup will be okay without me.*

Ba’ob nodded, even though it wasn’t a question. The wolf pressed her nose into Ba’ob’s hand, wet and cold. *Goodbye silly pup.*

 “Bye,” Ba’ob whispered, but she was already going. Trotting, then running into the woods with more excitement in her step than Ba’ob’d seen… ever. His chest squeezed. Had no right to keep her away from her kind so long.

And now, Ba’ob was alone. Goro’d left, and nobody was there. Ba’ob swallowed a whine and hurried back inside. Ba’ob wasn’t alone. Not like before. He’d just… remind himself of that for a while.