This Juckin' Guy

## Summary

The crew receives a free droid with a big personality. Pleck ejects C-53's cube. A wish of Dar's is finally granted. Nermut gets a delivery. C-53, as he is not waterproof, has water go across his vocal processors.

## Plot

Pleck tells Dar they should get some guns, C-53 warns them he would be obligated to tell Nermut. Bargie interrupts to announce her monthly self cleaning. It's very hot liquid. C-53 removes his cube at Pleck's suggest, Pleck immedietly replaces. Nermut calls, he is down because of a recent family reunion. The water makes C-53 a little goofy and a close talker. Nermut sends them a list of droid repair shops.

Hark Tartigast is crashing on an alien moon and reads sponsor copy for RXBar Whole Food Protein Bars.

The crew walks into the droid repair shop, the repair man (Footoo) is a Flurvian. He tells the crew that the C series of droid used to be sex bots. Stefai takes C-53 into the back to be fixed. Footoo then tries to sell Pleck a 'loader/gun droid' B-69-420, which is actually a roast droid. The droid comes with guns which sells Dar on the idea. The droid hits everyone in the genitals as a joke. Stefai brings a repaired C-53 back.

Back on Bargie, C-53 feels back to normal. B-69-420 calls jokes that Pleck and C-53 are lame nerd. B-69-420 used to live in a smoke filled bar, he also used to be a medical droid who ripped beings new defecation holes. B-69-420 is a Bargie fan and does not have a restraining bolt. Nermut calls, the introduce him to B-69-420. Nermut tells them that B-69-420 is not a loading droid and is mad that they now have an unauthorised droid. He says he'll call them back when they've dealt with it. They watch a clip from Bargie's incest film 'Big Papa Lover'. C-53 blurs out the more unacceptable part, Bargie makes him turn on the directors commentary. Bargie proposes that they make prank phone calls, so C-53 proposes that they call Nermut. B-69-420 pretends he is to receive 51 metric tonnes of defecate. They then call the Council of Seven, Councillor Chandler Trink and Councillor Rachel Arcuri answer. They tell them that Nermut is neck deep in deficate, they are not sure who that is. Dar is worried that Nermut will get in trouble. B-69-420 proposes they play Drethian Roulette, you load one shot into a i40-ion model cannon's 8 chambers, pass it around and take turns shooting it at your head. Bargie announces her ventilation system is full of dust, thanks to B-69-420. B-69-420 goes first and shoots himself in the cube, killing him. The crew mourn his death. As is tradition, they disassemble him and arrange his parts in descending size order. They keep his gun as it's a 'spare droid part'. Bargie sings as they eject his parts into space.

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Nermut calls them, he's happy because the Council of Seven looked at his file. He's surprised that they know who he is. They inform him that B-69-420 commited suicide, he's relieved that's one less thing he has to worry about. Nermut decides to call his parents, he tells the crew he loves them and they hang up.

Nermut is talking with Mr & Ms. Bundaloy, they tell him what a disappointment he is. He tells them that the Council of Sevel looked at his profile. Nermut gets an alert at his door and answers it. Its 51 metric tonnes of defecate, the delivery guy releases it and it goes straight into Nermuts mouth.

## Quotes

"Have you ever heard the saying: 'There's no free smunch'?" - Nermut

"B-69-420: Is the galaxy running correctly?

Council of Seven: So far we think it is.

B-69-420: Then why don't you catch it. END TRANSMISSION."

"Don't discount the importance of luck." - C-53

## Trivia

* C-53 is not 100% waterproof. The D series is.
* Nermut has 106 siblings.
* Some species are born without defecation holes and need one installed. Bargie has one installed.
* Bargie Film: Big Papa lover. It won a Gagoo award.
* When a ship is built it isn't allowed out until it is licenced.

## Credits

### **Voice actors**

C-53, Stefai, Councillor Rachel Arcuri, and Mr. Bundaloy - Jeremy Bent

Pleck Decksetter - Alden Ford

Dar - Allie Kokesh

Nermut Bundaloy - Seth Lind

Bargarean Jade and Ms. Bundaloy - Moujan Zolfaghari

Footoo the Droid Salesman, Councillor Chandler Trink, and Delivery Guy - Winston Noel

B-69-420 - Jon Gabrus

### **Production**

Edited - Alden Ford

Recorded - Braund Studios by Shane O'Connell

Sound Design and Mix - Shane O'Connell

Music - Brendan Ryan

Additional Music - Shane O'Connell

Opening Crawl Narration - Jeremy Crutchley

Ship Design - Eric Geusz