Gag

## Meta

**Timing:** Between "Evicted" and "Pretty Good"

**Setting:** Jackson's bachelor flat

## Text

Logan flops on Jackson's couch, grins, punches a number into the mobile he picked from Jackson's pocket as the poor drone left for work.

Two rings.

""Collocott~,"" singsongs the voice at the other end.

"'ey, Blossom."

""Did you finally get a mobile?""

"Nope. Borrowing my brother's."

""You wouldn't call unless you need something, so what is it?""

"I'm /**hurt** you think so little of me."

""Spit it out, Buttercup. 'm waiting on a [call about an interview].""

"Fine," huffs Logan. "[My] brother's been driving me crackers {the last two days} talking nonstop about [[[Charlie Darling|the latest love of his life]]] and I wanna mess with him, but I can't leave the flat."

""And /**why** can't you leave the flat?""

"My description's in the papers again."

A sigh.

"You're just jealous."

""You wish.""

Logan sniffs.

""So, what do you want [/**me**] to do about your predicament?""

"I was hoping you'd run [to the shops] and pick out something terrifically embarrassing I could leave in his medicine [cabinet. I'll pay you back for it."

""What are you thinking?""

"I dunno."

""Like, what? Furry porn? Edible underpants? Nipple c—""

"/**Something!**"]

""You're red as a rose 'bout now, ay?"" giggles Blossom. ""This /**never** gets old.""

"Will you do it or not?" snaps Logan.

""Don't get your shorties in a bunch. I'll be by with just the thing in about an hour.""

"Cool. Thanks."

""Don't thank me yet." Blossom disconnects.

Logan tosses the mobile aside, powers up the game console.

Seventy-four minutes and quite a few levels of /*Castle Crashers* later, Logan hops up to answer a knock at the door. "You're late," he greets.

"Better late than never, as they say about periods," retorts Blossom.

Logan wrinkles his nose.

"Never. Gets. Old," grins Blossom. "Anyway, you should be [/**so**] glad I had a shift at the clinic this week." Gives Logan the bag. "And just in case ...."

Logan takes in all the colours, all the promises, all the—

"Puns?"

"Yup—aha!" Blossom yanks a box from her knapsack. "If nothing else, ay? They're all sorts of funny colours /**and** sparkly."

Logan's expression hovers between disgust and amusement.

"I'm guessing your brother will make the same face as you, only with a little panic mixed in."

Now, Logan smiles.

Blossom pushes past and into the flat.

"C'mon in, then." Logan bows to the empty door.

"Thanks." Blossom starts opening kitchen cabinets. "Does he have a box of tea bags somewhere?"

"Above the stove." Logan cocks his head. "What're you thinking?"

"I saw this thing on Tumblr—that's on the in-ter-net for the technophobes—"

Logan rolls his eyes.

"—in the room—about people mistaking individually wrapped tea bags for—" Smirks at Logan. "—the other things."

A grin creeps across Logan's face. "You're thinking of swapping them."

Blossom grins. "Yup." Frowns. "Now, get your beanpole butt over here and get the tea down."

Logan steps over. "Aww ... cute li'l Blossom too short for big people cabinets?"

"Careful, Buttercup, or I'll punch your shins."

Logan snorts.

[“Oh, and you’re taking me to dinner after this.”

Logan scoffs.

“You /really wanna be here when your brother comes in kissing and undress—“

“Okay, I get your point, hurry the fuck up.”

Blossom grins.]