LEGO Metaworld Thanksgiving Special

* Robert Jacob: Hey guys, Robert Jacob here, we're doing a Thanksgiving special because it's pretty underrated, in my opinion. Thanksgiving is a holiday in the USA, USA, USA! As well as the place with the red weed leaf. Thanksgiving is a day when people put their hands together, pray (if you’re into that) and give thanks. In America (hell yeah), it is on the fourth Thursday of No Nut November. In maple leaf realm, it is on the second Monday of October, for some reason. In 1863, Old Abe, ended of slavery, said the last Thursday of NNN would be a national Day of Thanksgiving for Murica. So why does Canada do it differently? I mean, aside from them not being the United States. On that note, star-spangled immigrants are the reason why Maple Treeway even has our Turkey Day customs and practices, with their first Thanksgiving starting on April 5, 1872. It— it’s not like we l-like you or anything, Canada! Baka! The United States Congress got their theoretical blowtorch and welded the fourth Thursday of each November into a national holiday in 1941. It was in 1957 when Syrup Leaf Place made the second Monday of each October a national holiday. Thanksgiving was first celebrated to pray and give thanks for the harvest. The event that us Red, White, and Blue folk call the "First Thanksgiving" was celebrated, probably not with confetti, by the Pilgrims after having their first feast in the New World in October 1621. This feast lasted three days, and, in our household, we usually do something similar— immediate family on Thursday, Black Friday on… you guess, and more distant folk on Saturday. Edward Winslow, who present , claims that 90 Native Americans and 53 Pilgrims were there. More people in Fourth of July Country celebrate Thanksgiving than Santa Day and New Year, because they’re too busy either celebrating Hanukkah, like my daughter’s girlfriend, or whatever Muslim Christmas is. People in the Independence Day country devour at least 46 million of the Thanksgiving bird with a country named after it every… Thanksgiving. This year, we're gonna celebrate it with our family on the day, as opposed to most years. I have rented out a quaint looking plantation since I'm wealthy and the owners are going bankrupt. The joys of capitalism, y'know?
* *[They reach the farmhouse and park next to it. Robert, Robyn, and Gabriela open the doors and exit. They find a farmer who is crying.]*
* Robert Jacob: Yo.
* Farmer: Thuh drought has killed all uh our crops fer thuh past year an' now we hafta lease our home off tuh a multi-millionaire democrat!
* *[Cut to the corn crops bending over and falling down from the heat, crumbling to pieces on the ground.]*
* Robert Jacob: That's what you get for not voting Bernie.
* Farmer: Shut thuh hell up, dude!
* Robert Jacob: Man... hicks like you are all for our tycoon economy until it stares at you head-on.
* *[Cut to the interior of the farmhouse, where a rainbow logo reading "Jacob Eye" suddenly appears.]*
* Robert Jacob: Hello, welcome to Jacob Eye for the Non-Jacob Guy! Today we are going to talk about Thanksgiving and planning for the holiday.
* Karamo Jacob: What’s up? Karamo Jacob here, master of culture, not to pat myself on the back. There’s not much to say about Thanksgiving now that it’s basically just “eat turkey with your family day” but you can incorporate other cultural influences in, Robert is of Irish descent and Robyn has French heritage and they… don’t do too much with that. It’s the day of turkeys, don’t overthink it.
* Blondish Guy Jacob: Hi, blondish guy Jacob here, I do interior design. Thanksgiving isn’t typically a day where you do much construction, unless your job involves cranes and safety vests, in which case that’s almost every day for you. Instead I’ll be giving out decoration tips for today. If you’re wealthy enough to rent somewhere out for this occasion like Robert is, I’d choose somewhere quaint and maybe a bit older. Autumn-themed crafts with leaves add a nice aesthetic, you can really go all out but try to stick with brown, orange, and tan, I guess.
* Tan Jacob: On that note, Tan Jacob is here, brothers! Tan is my name, fashion is my game. You should choose the clothes that you want, don’t conform if it’s not what you want to look like. If you really need my advice, wear something formal but maybe try to avoid lighter colors, in case you’re not a clean eater. The inclusion of an ascot or handkerchief in your outfit could prove of use if a mess occurs, but it is preferable that you wear one of a darker color if you plan on reusing it, which you should. These aren’t disposable, okay?
* Hair Jacob: Hair Jacob here, I do grooming and makeovers. If you’re comfortable with how you look than don’t change, but if you aren’t than I’ll hand off a few tips. Combed styles might suit the occasion best, but if you have longer hair than try… whatever the equivalent of that would be for long hair. I’m sorry, you’ll have to decide that for yourself. If you wear makeup, choose whichever foundation, eyeliner, and gloss you think suits you best. Again, I don’t know you, you know you, hear your calling and answer it.
* Antoni Jacob: Finally, Antoni Jacob, food and wine specialist. Now, I think we all know that food is pretty central to Thanksgiving, but you do you. If you want to have some random stuff in a pot, bento, and pho, you do you. But traditionally, people have turkey, mashed potatoes, pumpkin pie, and whatnot. I’m not clear on what wine people usually have so you do you, but red seems like a great bet to me. Hard apple cider is also worth a try, for sure— think beer but with apples. You can make your own, store bought, red, green, red and green, you do you. I’m sure it’ll taste like the Earth’s most delicious golden shower, delivered by none other than Caishen, the Chinese God of Prosperity!
* Farmer: What thuh sam hell are y'all doing?
* Robert Jacob: Shit, I should've known they're the "Adam & Eve, Not Adam & Steve" type.
* Farmer: Bitch, do y'all thank we care? It's 2021, gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, whatever "plus" is, we're okay with that. We're confused an disturbed by y'all talkin tuh yourself an wearin wigs.
* Robert Jacob: Alright, great to know, my daughter is queer and she is having her girlfriend over.
* Farmer: Aw, cute! Ah say- now Ah say- anyone is allowed in thuh Drigger household, as long as they love Chevy.
* Robert Jacob: I mean... we took a gas-electric here... but anywhere further and I'd have taken ours, no cap!
* Farmer: We got sum food here... none that we have grown or raised ourselves, as I'm sure y'all kin tell... maybe we could make a sort uh tray fer thuh girls, tuh hold them over?
* Robert Jacob: Sure... my daughter is vegan, so hold the ranch, I guess.
* Farmer: I was thinkin uh makin a platter with thuh colors an places uh a pride flag fer those two; goobers, pork skins, corn dog, collard, slim jim, an persimmon, frum top tuh bottom!
* Robert Jacob: Not all of that is vegan... nor does it match the colors of a rainbow flag, or the modern one, for that matter... maybe a Bud Lite for the three of us?
* Farmer: Yes! If y'all cut all uh our veins open, please don't, by thuh way, there would be nuthin but Bud Lite spillin out!
* Robert Jacob: Noted.
* *[Cut to them outside.]*
* Robert Jacob: So, how did it happen?
* Farmer: What?
* Robert Jacob: The thing... the terrible thing... the drought?
* Farmer: Oh yeah, thuh drought! Thuh sun dun that.
* Robert Jaocb: Yeah, but... why did you start a farm here?
* Farmer: Whel, we was able ta buy this here land faw dert cheap ayn' we figured we should start ayy farm. Nothing were here, aside frawum thay... err, red Indian buriaal ground.
* Robert Jacob: Jeez, I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions about your tolerance... I mean, uh... did you ever, let's just say, "interfere," with the burial ground?
* Farmer: Naw ser, we just done started this here farm near thay... uhh, grounds, they nevuurr done had thay... uhh, boneyard faw sale.
* Robert Jacob: Has anything like this happened with your plantation before?
* Farmer: We have done faced problems ayn' shawtages, sure, but we nevuurr done had ta deal with anything like this here... we would be out av business, faw sure.
* Robert Jacob: So... "red Indians," huh?
* Farmer: Look, it wasn't until Biden done won that there we done had ta call them awful red. That there wasn't my idea, fathuurr has that there awful red on his hands.
* Robert Jacob: I'll keep that in mind.
* *[Cut to the interior; a doorbell rings.]*
* Robert Jacob: We only invited two other people, that must be Tyler and Tyra.
* *[Opens door, the two of them are there.]*
* Tyra Beaulieu: Bonjour.
* Tyler Ferrari: Ciao.
* Robert Jacob: There you are! I'm impressed that you went from the Mediterranean to 'Merica for this.
* Tyra Beaulieu: As am I.
* Tyler Ferrari: Hey, you know I respect you, Jacob. I may only be your nephew in law, but to me, you're a made man, my stand-up guy. Robyn and her comare here?
* Robert Jacob: Why wouldn't they be?
* Tyler Ferrari: It's kind to ask, it's what makes a goodfella good.
* Robert Jacob: A goodfella ain't exactly good, but you are a good... fella?
* Farmer: Oh shit, we got Super Mario in our house.
* Tyler Ferrari: Damn straight! He may ice Goombas, but that doesn't mean he ain't one!
* Farmer: Uh... sure?