Episode 20 - Touchdown Babies and The Trial

(Theme Song)

Mia: (Singing) Catching babies... and give them hugs... we're soft and cuddly just like Pip and Freddy. Don't worry babies you're safe when we're together. You know we're gonna be friends forever! Mia Kitten tot adventurer, Mia Kitten tot adventurer. Hold my paw let's find adventure. Mia Kitten tot adventurer. Open up your arms and catch a hug!

(All baby animals giggled as a theme song ends)

Title: "Disney Junior's Mia Kitten"

(Cut to the episode title with a picture of Mia, her baby friends; Kiki, Scooter, Precious, Pablo, Chase, Marty, Didi, Betty, Bobby, Tara and Ellie Playing In The Baby Bowl Game While All Of The Dads Including Sam Watch The Ultra Ball Game)

Mia: (Reading Episode Title Off-Screen) "Touchdown Babies"

(Episode Starts With Mia Chasing A Balloon At Auntie Cora And Uncle Sam's And While She Is Chasing It She Bumped Her Head On The Table And Started Crying)

Mia: (Crying And Sobbing) WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!! WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!! (Continues Crying)

Auntie Cora: What Happened? What Happened?

Uncle Sam: Gee I Don't Know Honey I Saw Her Just A Minute Ago!

Auntie Cora: Oh No! Sam! Just Look At This Gigantic Bruise!

The camera angles from the top view of Mia's head where the bruise is visible. Then She looks up, smiling.

Uncle Sam: Cora, She probably just bumped her head trying to get that balloon.

(Uncle Sam looks underneath the table at the balloon)

Auntie Cora: Sam, are you blaming Mia's concussion on the balloon?

Uncle Sam: Concussion?

(When Sam got up, He bangs his head on the table by accident)

Auntie Cora: It's not the balloon's fault, Sam. Oh, how can Captain Beakmen and I trust you dads with the Tots babies during the game this afternoon? You won't watch them at all.

Mia: Mommy!

Uncle Sam: Of course we will!

Auntie Cora: Don't be silly. After kickoff all you boys will be thinking about is guzzling soda and gobbling pork rinds.

Uncle Sam: (giving referee's "time out" signal) Whoa, time out, Cora! I haven't had pork rinds in years.

Auntie Cora: Maybe I should just stay home. This place is an accident waiting to happen.

Uncle Sam: Cora, She won't hurt herself again. I promise.

Antie Cora: Well... maybe you're right.

(Mia walks to the table and once again bumps her head. We zoom into Auntie Cora's mouth as she screams.

Cut to the basement, where Sam is working on an invention. Grandpa watches him.)

Grandpa: You're gonna what?

Uncle Sam: I'm gonna invent something that'll keep Mia from hurting herself, Pop.

Grandpa: You can't keep a baby from hurtin' hisself! Why, when I was a sprat, I used to crawl through Ma's cactus garden, huntin' for horny toads.

Uncle Sam: (skeptical) Horny toads, Pop?

Grandpa: That's what I said! And all I had on was my birthday suit! What're you gonna do, put Tommy in a bubble?

(We see a sketch of Mia in a bubble.)

Uncle Sam: Well, if I don't think of something, we dads are gonna have to take turns looking after the kids. That means watching the game in shifts.

Grandpa: (surprised) Shifts? Well, let's get busy, then!

(Mia empties the popcorn out of the bowl and places the empty bowl on her head. Sam looks.

Uncle Sam: (amazed) Pop! That's it! Look! Protective head gear!

Grandpa: Huh?

(Uncle Sam picks up the phone and calls Precious' Dad We cut to Precious' Dad's House where we see Precious is katydid screams, making faces and scaring her kitty, Fluffy, her white persian cat screeching. Precious' Dad's phone rings; he picks up the receiver.

Precious' Dad: Drew.

Uncle Sam: Precious' Dad? Sam.

Precious' Dad: Sam?

Uncle Sam: Right, Precious' Dad. Listen, I think I've solved this baby sitting thing. Get a hold of all the other dads and tell'em the game is still on. And Precious' Dad?

Precious' Dad: Yeah, Sam?

Uncle Sam: This is top secret.

(We cut back to the living room)

Uncle Sam: Oh Cora! We've got something to show you!

Auntie Cora: What's going on?

Uncle Sam: Cora, you and Captain Beakmen may go to the mall WITHOUT FEAR.

Auntie Cora: We can?

Stu: That's right. Because Mia is now virtually UNBRUISABLE.

Auntie Cora: She is?

Uncle Sam: Yeah! Here, I'll show you.

Auntie Cora: What on earth is it, Sam?

(Sam picks up Mia. On Mia's head, Mia is wearing headgear composed of a Demi Lovato Doll, 3 rolls of toilet paper and some Pink string.

Uncle Sam: Presenting the Bonkomatic Baby Bumper.

Auntie Cora: The bonka-whosit baby what?

Uncle: The Bonkomatic Baby Bumper offers complete cranial suspension, protection from the 1001 hazards of the average American hosuehold, the absolute freedom of movement, and best of all, a worry-free day of shopping for mom.

Auntie Cora: Oh, I don't know, Sam. Are you sure it will work?

Mia: Yes Uncle Sam Are You Sure?

(Then Mia walks at the table and bangs Her head again. This time, She is uninjured, as the head gear protected Herself.

Uncle Sam: See? it's guaranteed.

Auntie Cora: Well... all right.

(We cut to the exterior of the front door from the ground view. The door opens. We see Auntie Cora's legs and feet as she walks out the door)

Auntie Cora: Captain Beakmen and I will be back in a few hours. Bye-bye Mia!

(Cut back to living room. Grandpa & Uncle Sam give high fives)

Grandpa & Uncle Sam: Yes!

Cut to playpen Mia is wearing her Bonkomatic.

Kiki: What's it for, anyway?

Marty: Yeah, what's it for?

Mia: I think it's to keep my fact from gettin' out.

Cut to front door. Precious' Dad knocks.

Grandpa: Halt! Who goes there?

Precious' Dad: Hi, Pop.

Grandpa: What's the password?

Precious' Dad holds up a bag of pork rinds.

Precious' Dad: Pork rinds?

Grandpa: Bingo!

Precious' Dad and the other guys enter. J.P pulls in a giant TV set with large speakers. Grandpa and Stu are wearing Houston Oilers (1991) shirts, while Precious' Dad and Marty's Dad And Kiki's Dad wear Dallas Cowboys shirts. J.P was wearing a green sweatshirt with a picture of a yellow chess knight on front.

Sam: Hey, Charles. Great! You brought the big-screen TV! Oooh! In Surround-A-Thon stereo!

J.P: I dunno, Sam... maybe this football game isn't such a good idea. Wouldn't you rather watch the chess play-offs on Culture Channel?

Sam: Gee, I don't know. What Do you think, guys?

The other guys boo Chazz and give him thumbs down.

Cut back to playpen. Since the last time, Lucky and Precious were added. Mia was still wearing the Bonkomatic.

Precious: What's that stupid thing you got on your head?

(The guys walk to the playpen. Uncle Sam picks up Mia.)

Uncle Sam: Guys, now that you're here, I can show everyone. Here it is, the answer to all our parenting problems -- the Bonkomatic Baby Bumper. Guys, we're talking complete cranial protection here. Baby gets to play, dad gets to go about his business and voila! No more worried moms. And best of all, each kid gets one!

Grandpa, J.P., Precious' Dad, Kiki's Dad & Marty's Dad: Yes!

(The guys hoot and walk back to the TV and sit down. The Ultra Bowl titles and music flash on the screen. Commentators Chick Hearn (the genuine article) and Hank Duff appear on screen, on the field.)

Chick: Hello again everybody, and welcome to our coverage of football's big event -- The Ultra Bowl. I'm Chick Hearn, coming to you live from the Lone Star State with my good friend, Hank Duff.

Hank: Hi folks.

Chick: Hank, how's it feel to be back on your home turf?

Hank taps on ground with his foot.

Hank: Feels great, Chick.

Cut to rear view of couch as the guys cheer. Keep in mind that this is 1991, when Houston still had an NFL football team. In 1997, the Oilers moved to Nashville to become the Tennessee Oilers and in 1999, they became the Tennessee Titans.

Sam & Grandpa: Come on, Houston!

Precious' Dad, Kiki's Dad & Marty's Dad: Go Get Them Dallas!

Cut to front of couch; J.P interrupts with his unnecessary knowledge.

J.P.: Actually, both teams have their strong points...

(The guys force J.P. down to his seat in disgust)

Meanwhile, we cut back to the playpen; all the Tots Babies were wearing Bonkomatics -- Marty Has A bowl on His head with a teddy bear on top and a toilet paper roll under His chin; Lucky was wearing a bucket with some sponges inside; Precious was wearing a diaper on her head, held on with string and toilet paper.

Mia: Lucky, you in there?

Lucky: I Think so.

Precious: I Bet You Are Right That your Uncle made me wear this Coolest baby helmet ever.

Mia: You Must Be Right, Precious! they're really neat.

Marty & Kiki: Yeah!

Marty: And look at this!

Marty & Kiki stand on their heads.

Lucky: Wow!

Mia: Come on, Bro! let's do it!

Mia & Lucky stand on their heads.

Precious: I learned this in ballet class!

(Precious follows suit, but falls over dizzy.)

Cut back to guys as they continue watching the game. Chick, on-screen, describes the actions of the game.

Chick: It's first and ten. Parnelli gets the snap. Hands off to Jenkins who goes up the middle of Huston... (Stu and Grandpa gasp in surprise.) ...and he stops at the line of scrimmage.

Precious' Dad: Face it, Sam, that Dallas line is impenetrable.

Grandpa: Impenetrable? Bunch of whimps is more like it. (He reaches a hand into the bag of pork rinds.) In my day, we played reai football.

ck at Minnesota State, they ca

me The Galloping... uh... The Galloping...

Precious' Dad: ...Geezer?

(the guys laugh)

Grandpa: Very funny! I was the Galloping -- (He again reaches his hand into the now-empty bag.) Hey, we out of pork rinds already?

Stu: There's more in the kitchen, Pop. Hey, Pop, would'ya give the kids their bottles while you're up? (to the guys) Galloping Geezer!

(The guys laugh.)

(All the Babies are on their heads, but as Grandpa enters the area, they Tots Babies down. He has milk bottles for them.)

Grandpa: Come Here Little Ones, Got Your Bottles Ready! (hands milk bottles to each Baby,) here's one for Kiki; and this one's for ol' Lucky. And here's one for the adorable panda

Precious: Bottles are for babies, Grandpa. I'm not a baby!

Grandpa: Huh, I plum forgot! (gives a Demi Lovato sippy cup of chocolate milk to Mia) Fixed up something special for you, scout!

(Grandpa leaves. Precious watches Mia drink the chocolate milk, and teases her.

Precious: Drinky little baba, baby-boo?

(A drop of chocolate milk falls to the ground; Mia's Kitty Angelica, who's with the Babies in the playpen, licks it up.)

Mia: Wow! It's chocolate milk!

Marty & Kiki: Chocolate milk!

Precious: Chocolate milk! Gimme that bottle!

Mia: No! It's mine!

Precious: I said give it!

Mia: Uh-uh!

Mia & Precious fight over the bottle in a "tug-of-war" fashion.

Precious: Gimme that chocolate milk! Gimme that bottle!

(Mia and Precious continue to struggle while we hear Chick and Hank do Ultra Bowl commentary. The Babies' actions coincide with the commentary.)

Chick: It's Sebastini with the draw play.

Hank: Oooh, nowhere to go, Chick.

Chick: But he squirts through to pick up seven yards before he's finally dragged down from behind.

Hank: Nice second effort there, Chick.

Chick: Thanks, Hank. Dallas falls second and three at their own 18 yard line.

(Mia squirts Precious and falls over which opens the playpen; Mia walks over Precious' head.)

(Back at the couch, the guys are paying more attention to the game, rather than to the Babies.)

Grandpa: Second and who?

Other guys: Three!

Grandpa: Turn it up, Stu; my ear's on the fritz.

(Cut back to Babies.)

Chick: Here's the snap. Dawkin's dropping back to throw but the pocket collapses around him. He's trapped in the back field. Big Bubba Nogursky breaks through.

Hank: Looks like a sack for sure, Chick.

Chick: But wait! Kincaid is wide open at the line of scrimmage! Dawkins gets the ball off just as Bubba crashes him to the ground!

(While Precious tackles Mia, Lucky catches the bottle. While they toss the bottle around, chocolate milk dribbles out of it.)

Cut to guys watching game on TV.

Precious' Dad: Wow! What a shovel pass.

Uncle Sam: Sheer luck.

Cut back to Babies.

Chick: Here comes a draw play up the middle, but Nogursky is there and he grabs Kincaid around the knees. Whoa, a fumble! Loose ball!

(Precious tackles Lucky Then The bottle rolls around.)

Hank: Boy, what's going on down there, Chick? This guy moves like nobody in the league!

Chick: But wait! DiAngelo dives on it! What a break for Dallas!

Hank: He came out of nowhere, Chick. Marty sees bottle, and dives on it; he sucks the bottle.) And believe me, he doesn't wanna give up that ball. Dallas ball, first and 10 and the 11-yard line. What? The Statue of Liberty play! How long's it been since we've seen that one?

Cut to Grandpa.

Grandpa: Not since Minnesota state, young fella!

Cut back to The Tots Babies.

Mia: Hey Kiki! Over here!

Lucky: Get it, Sis!

Chick: Look at this, Hank. They're playing backyard football with this explosive Houston team! Not a prudent thing to do here in the House of Pain. Uh-oh, Dawkins is tripped up by his own man, the line coming at him.

Hank: Ouch, that hurts, Chick.

After the Babies pass the bottle around, Marty tosses the bottle to Kiki, who's riding on Blake's back. Kiki tosses it to Lucky, which bounces off his Bonkomatic and into the hands of Mia. Precious runs towards Tommy, But Kiki trips her.

Chick: Dawkins has the ball, but there's Bubba again.

Hank: Go, Bubba.

Chick: Dawkins is under severe pressure; he hesitates, he pump fakes the ball and he looks to Kincaid. He throws the bomb. It's intercepted, Hank!

Precious rushes toward Mia. He fakes a throw and tosses bottle to Lucky, only to have Precious catch the bottle. The nipple comes off, causing the milk to splatter everywhere.

Hank: Wow! Norgursky made an all-pro move on this one, Chick. Let's take another look. (We see the same above action again, in slow motion.)  Mud everywhere, Chick.

Back to regular motion; Precious sucks on bottle which is empty.

Chick: What a mess, Hank. We'll be back with more Ultra Bowl coverage after these important messages.

Ultra Bowl theme starts.

Precious: It's empty!

(Precious possibly cries loud and long. The door is heard opening and closing in the background.)

Auntie Cora: [off-screen] Precious Panda! What in the world is going on here?

Precious: Huh?

Guys: Huh? (The guys who look behind couch to find Auntie Cora and Captain Beakmen standing sternly in the doorway who find the living room in a big mess.) Uh oh.

The camera pans to the right from the Tots Babies to Precious and the mothers.

Captain Beakmen: Where Is Mommy's Little-Known Demi Lovato Lover?

Mia: (Gasps Happfuly) Mommy!

Auntie Cora: (angrily) What are the kids covered with, and what are Those horrible stains all over my living room?

Captain Beakmen: (picks Up Mia In Her Wings Then Looks At Precious) I don't know, Cora; looks like chocolate milk.

Auntie Cora: Chocolate milk?

Grandpa laughs nervously.

Auntie Cora picks up Precious by her arm and looks accusingly at the guys.

Auntie Cora: Who was watching her when this happened?

Sam, Precious' Dad, Lucky's Dad J.P, and Howard hung their heads in shame.

J.P: I told you we should have watched the chess tournament.

The Guys glare at J.P Then The Tots Babies sit innocently in the middle of the floor covered with chocolate milk Mia's Kitty Fluffy walks to Precious and licks her.

Precious: Eww! Yuck! Ick! Get'im off of me!

Other Tots Babies: Alright!

The Tots Babies give each other high fives and fall on the floor.

(END OF FIRST HALF EPISOSE)

(Next Episode Starts With Mia Being The Judge As Lucky Sits As Witness And Precious Seems Guilty About Breaking Mia's Demi Lovato Lamp And Kiki And Marty Watching And Mia's Demi Lovato Doll And Her Kitty Angelica Are The Jerky)

Mia: (Reading Episode Title Off-Screen) "The Trial"

(Opens with Mia's Demi Lovato lamp shining and spinning around a room. After a couple of spins, it begins to fall. Then we cut to the kitchen where Cora is with Captain Beakmen and Mia is being fed with some kitty kibbles.)

Captain Beakmen: Open Up Mia-Mia. (A loud crash is heard and Captain Beakmen grabs Mia and runs with Cora to where they find the broken lamp.) Oh, Sis, that was Demi Lovato, Mia's favorite lamp. (Mia Starts Crying And Sobbing)

Mia: (Started Crying And Sobbing) WAAHHHHHHH WAH-HAH-HAH-HAAAH (Continues Crying)

Captain Beakmen: There, there sweetie.