My Little Pony X Spongebob Parody Sharks

**Derpy:** Uhh, what do you like better? The apple pies, or a chocolate muffin?

**Rarity:** I like neither. Can I take your order?

**Derpy:** What about a muffin with sprinkles, are they any good?

**Rarity:** No. What will you have?

**Derpy:** Well, uhh, what's your vote on the apple pie.

**Rarity:** *[She finally loses her temper and she throws the paper and pencil in anger]* Miss, let's just get this out of the way, I hate everything on the menu! Now, what do you want?

**Pinkie Pie:** *[Pokes her head out from behind the kitchen window]* Psst, try a chocolate muffin!

**Derpy:** Uhh, I'll try a chocolate muffin.

**Rarity:** That'll be one bit. *[Rings up one bit then a siren goes off]*

**Derpy:** What's going on?

**Rarity:** Something stupid, I'm sure. *[Alarm stops as a curtain opens up to show a real band in the background playing carnival music. Mr. Cake comes out from the restroom, cheering]*

**Mr. Cake:** Yippee! *[Kisses Derpy and Rarity. Takes the bit and laughs hysterically as he rubs it all over himself]* Whoo-ha! Whoo-ha!

**Rarity:** See? I told you.

**Pinkie Pie:** What's wrong with Mr. Cake?

**Mr. Cake:** *[Looks weird as he runs over to the counter]* Nothing, lad! Do you know what this is?!

**Rarity:** A very dirty bit?

**Mr. Cake:** No! This is my one millionth bit earned. Every in my family's goal in life is to make a million bits, and now I got mine. Congratulations, Miss. You have just given me my one millionth bit.

**Derpy:** Ha, great. Uhh, what do I win?

**Mr. Cake:** Nothing. Now get out.

**Derpy:** Uhh, what?

**Mr. Cake:** Get out! Everypony get out, you're spoiling me moment! *[Pushes everypony out the door]* Me millionth bit.

**Pinkie Pie:** Congratulations, Mr. Cake.

**Mr. Cake:** Congratulate yourselves, lad. A good man's nothing without his loyal crew. I mean, a crew like you *[He imagines Pinkie Pie and, and Rarity looking deformed]* comes around maybe once in a lifetime. And to reward you for making me millionth bit, I'm taking you on a trip.

**Pinkie Pie:** Wow, a trip!

**Rarity:** I can't believe it, Mr. Cake. Where we going, Spa Day?

*[Scene cuts to the three of them in a pool]*

**Mr. Cake:** No.

**Rarity:** Pamper Island?

*[Scene cuts to the three of them laying on towels at a beach]*

**Mr. Cake:** Try again.

**Rarity:** Ooh, ooh, ooh, The Ponyville Folk Village?

*[Scene cuts to the three of them in 18th century clothing]*

**Mr. Cake:** Better than that!

*[Scene cuts to them wearing raincoats on a boat accompanied by a foghorn noise, Rarity looks annoyed]*

**Rarity:** Fishing?! This is the reward we get for all our hard work? *[Fishes are jumping]* Fishing for stinky fishes in a smelly old boat on a filthy lagoon? You call this fun?

**Mr. Cake:** Aww, come on now, Rarity. Three fellas at sea with nothing to do but throw their lines in the water, catch a few fishes *[Catches a fish then he throws it back]* then throw them back. Don't you think that's fun?

**Rarity:** *[annoyed]* No. *[Takes off her raincoat and sits on her chair]* And to think I could be wearing a powdered wig right now.

**Pinkie Pie:** Hey Rare, you want to me cast out over here so you can watch me?

**Rarity:** How about you cast out over there so I can ignore you?

**Pinkie Pie:** Okay. *[Pinkie Pie casts her line behind her which catches on Rarity Magazine's Pinkie Pie brings her line forward and casts it in the lagoon. Pinkie Pie casts Rarity's chair and she spins in the air]*

**Rarity:** Hey! watch where you're swinging that... *[Pinkie Pie casts Rarity's mane in the lagoon]* Yeow!! Oh my beautiful mane! *[growls]* Pinkie Pie! be careful with... ow! *[Pinkie Pie casts Rarity's nose into the lagoon. Rarity screams loudly in pain, then walks up to Mr. Cake]* Okay, I've had enough.

**Mr. Cake:** *[Laughs]* Oh, Rarity, you got to lighten up. *[Pinkie Pie is still casting out items while Mr. Cake talks to Rarity]* Sure the lad's a bit overeager, but you've got to learn to roll with the punches, go with the flow. And don't bring anything on a boat that you ain't prepared to lose. *[Laughs. The hook in Pinkie Pie's fishing rod touches Mr. Cake's millionth bit. Gasps]* Me millionth bit! *[Pinkie Pìe rips Mr. Cake's bag off and casts his bit to the lagoon]* Pinkie Pie, wait! Pinkie Pie, you hooked me millionth bit on the back swing! Reel it in before I keelhaul ya. *[Music plays]* Oh no. Girls, quick, reel it in. Can't you hear the music? That's a 4/4 string ostinato in D minor! Everypony knows that means death! Reel it in before it's too late! Hurry, Pinkie Pie! The music's getting faster! *[Pinkie Pie reels it in as fast as she can. Mr. Cake opens the doors to the orchestra]* There you are, ya stinkin' bilge rats! *[to the trumpeters]* Stop playing that music! *[to the conductor]* Stop it, please! *[to the violinists]* I'm begging ya! Come on, honey, you can make it! Swim faster! Come to me, baby! Come on back! Hurry, Pinkie Pie!

**Pinkie Pie:** Here she comes...She made it!

**Mr. Cake:** *[Holds up the bit and cheers]* For a second or two, I thought she was a goner. *[Ominous orchestra music plays again. Suddenly, a giant shark jumps up and takes Mr. Cake's bit. It takes a while for Mr. Cake to notice his bit isn't in his hoof anymore. The shark swims away. The scene cuts as Mr. Cake’s eyes well up with tears, and he begins to cry]*

**Rarity:** So, some trip, eh, Mr. Cake?

**Mr. Cake:** Oh, Rarity! You're never gonna believe it! A giant blue-lipped shark ate me millionth bit! *[sobbing and flops to the ground]* I lost me bit, and I'll never get it back! *[bangs his hooves against the floor]* Never, never, never, never, never!

**Pinkie Pie:** I've never seen Mr. Cake so broken up. *[Mr. Cake is literally in pieces, crying]*

**Rarity:** Oh, puh-lease, he's such a drama queen. C'mon, Mr. Cake, drop the act. *[Mr. Cake is crying while sucking his hooves]* Mr. Cake, it's just a stupid bit. *[Mr. Cake continues weeping as he pours tears into his mouth]* For Pete's sake, Mr. Cake, suck it up! *[Mr. Cake's eyes inflate then squirt out tears]* Mr. Cake... *[Mr. Cake is wailing like a fountain]* Mr. Cake.. *[Mr. Cake is sobbing like a faucet. Rarity has had enough.]* Okay, okay, Mr. Cake, we'll help you get your bit back!

**Mr. Cake:** *[Sucks on a real life thumb then he throws it away]* You will? Great! Wait right here. *[Runs off to get some items and comes back with a bunch of fishing gear on]* Here's where shark fishing gets serious. *[Scene cuts to later in the day where Mr. Cake is on top of the boat and Pinkie Pie and Rarity are on the lower deck]* Okay, you girls get the fishing poles and I'll keep me eyes peeled for Old Blue Lip.

**Pinkie Pie:** *[Salutes]* Aye aye, captain!

**Mr. Cake:** And remember, we don't leave until we catch that shark and rescue me bit. *[Mr. Cake scouts the area. Scene cuts to later where Mr. Cake has a beard on from scouting for too long. Pinkie Pie, and Rarity have unkempt manes]*

**Rarity:** *[shaking her head]* That's it, I'm finished! We've been here for three days and haven't gotten a nibble! This is hopeless!

**Pinkie Pie:** Yeah, and I've gotta get home to feed gummy *[Scene cuts to gummy chewing up her owner's couch at home]*

**Rarity:** We're gonna die out here just because a shark ate Mr. Cake's stupid bit! *[Takes a bit out of her wallet]* Well, if he wants his bit back, I say we give it to him. Know what I mean? Huh? Huh? Huh?

**Pinkie Pie:** Oh, I get ya. *[Jabbers. Scene cuts to later in the day where Mr. Cake is still scouting the area]*

**Rarity And** **Pinkie Pie*: '***Oh, Mr. Cake! Mr. Cake! *[Mr. Cake steers his eyes toward the other two to see them waving a bit]* Look what we've got!

**Mr. Cake:** *[Jumps down and gasps]* Could it be? *[Takes the bit]* Me millionth dollar bit? *[Starts cheering again as well as Pinkie Pie and Rarity]* Whoo-hoo! *[Rubs the bit on himself but he notices something strange so he stops dancing]* Wait a minute... *[Rubs the bit back and forth again and points at the bit]* This isn't me millionth bit. *[Pinkie Pie and Rarity look at each other]* This is an ordinary bit dollar that's been crumpled up, torn slightly, soaked in the lagoon, *[Shows the bit just like described]* and kissed with Cupcake Blue #2 Semi-Gloss Lipstick.

**Pinkie Pie:** *[wearing blue lipstick and a purse]* Actually, it's Cupcake Blue number- *[Rarity whacks her on the head with a fishing rod to shut her up, but it's already too late]* three!

**Mr. Cake:** I trusted you, and you gave me this?! I can't believe me own crew would betray me like this. *[sobs]*

**Rarity:** No. Uh-uh. No, we will not be swayed by tears anymore.

**Mr. Cake:** *[stops sobbing, then narrows his eyes]* I see. Then I guess I have no choice but to offer a reward.

**Rarity:** You're kidding?

**Pinkie Pie:** Woo! Is it another fishing trip?

**Mr. Cake:** No. It's this sandwich. *[Nails the sandwich to a pole]*

**Rarity:** A sandwich? You expect me to break my back over a sandwich?

**Mr. Cake:** Not *a* sandwich. *[throws the other sandwiches into the lagoon]* *The* sandwich.

**Rarity:** Whatever. We've got plenty more to... *[She and Pinkie Pie get shocked. Mr. Cake throws the refrigerator into the lagoon]* ...eat.

**Mr. Cake:** Now, I think we understand each other. Nopony eats until I get my millionth bit back.

**Rarity:** Uhh, Pinkie Pie, can I have a word with you? Have you noticed that Mr. Cake has gone completely insane?!

**Pinkie Pie:** What do you mean?

**Rarity:** Just look at him. *[Pointing to Mr. Cake, who is dressed like he is at a funeral sobbing at a tombstone with the words 'R.I.P. Me Millionth Bit' on it. He then hugs it.]*

**Pinkie Pie:** Rarity, he's lost something near and dear to him. Haven't you— *[Mr. Cake laughs maniacally]*

**Rarity:** Look again. *[Mr. Cake uses his tail as a jump rope while giggling like a crazy person]*

**Pinkie Pie:** *[now visibly scared]* You're right. How do we get outta here?

**Rarity:** If we're real quiet, we can sneak over to the lifeboat.

**Pinkie Pie:** Okay. *[Both take a step, then start screaming as they sprint over to the lifeboat. They jump into it but then come back onto the boat tied up; Mr. Cake pops his head out of the lifeboat]*

**Mr. Cake:** So you thought you'd skip out on old Mr. Cake, did ya? Even after you promised to help me. I know what you're thinking. "It's just a dumb old bit. Let's just leave the old man, he won't notice." *[sobs]* Well, it's not going down like that. There's only one use for a backstabbing crew like you: *[Scene cuts to Mr. Cake hanging his line over the boat. Pinkie Pie and Rarity are attached to the line]* live bait!

**Rarity:** You're crazy! If that shark didn't come before, what makes you think he'll come now?

**Mr. Cake:** *[Dressed up as a conductor]* Oh, he'll come. *[Taps the book using his baton and the doors open up to the orchestra and begins to play the ominous music; Pinkie Pie and Rarity shake and scream in terror]*

**Rarity:** Mr. Cake, listen, I work with Pinkie Pie all day long, so I know what I'm talking about when I say... *[Yells]* you are completely out of your mind! *[Mr. Cake giggles madly in response while conducting the orchestra. The giant shark emerges above the lagoon coming closer to the two on the line]* Get us out of here!

**Mr. Cake:** Come on, fresh meat! *[Pinkie Pie and Rarity scream as they try to wiggle back and forth to avoid the giant shark]* Keep thrashing! He likes it! *[Both continue to scream and bounce up and down really fast]* Come on, boy! Closer. Closer. Almost there. *[Giant shark shows the bit on its tongue]* That's it! *[Closes the doors to cause the music to stop. The giant shark stops in mid-air and Mr. Cake jumps inside it to take the bit]* Aha! Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! Look, girls, I finally got it! *[Rubs his bit on himself]* I finally got me millionth bit! *[Cabin doors open to play the ominous music again. The giant shark closes its mouth, with Mr. Cake inside, and dives into the lagoon. Cabin doors close as the conductor takes a bow to the applauding audience]*

**Pinkie Pie:** Oh, poor Mr. Cake. Gone forever out of our lives... *[A tear falls down her cheek and sobs]* Why couldn't it have been me?!

**Rarity:** Yes, why couldn't it have been one of you?! *[Sobbing]*

**Pinkie Pie:** Why did he have to go like this?! Why? *[Crying]*

**Rarity:** Why did he have to go like this and leave me tied to this idiot?! *[the two sobs]*

**Mr. Cake:** Hello, girls. *[Pinkie Pie and Rarity stop sobbing]*

**Pinkie Pie and Rarity:** Mr. Cake? *[Mr. Cake's head is above the lagoon]*

**Mr. Cake:** Have you Guys met... *[Holds his millionth bit up]* ...me millionth bit? *[laughs]*

**Pinkie Pie:** Wow, how did you get it back?

**Mr. Cake:** It wasn't easy. Old Blue Lips is quite the fighter. So, eventually, we settled on a trade.

**Pinkie Pie:** What did you give him? *[Mr. Cake jumps back up on the boat, revealing himself as only having a head and left hoof]*

**Mr. Cake:** Nothing important. *[Laughs. Pinkie Pie and Rarity* *look shocked.]*