Blend H

**Summary:** The girl Hunters and Adam stand in for the sick workers at an anime trope cafe, hilarity ensues.

***This is meant to be a spoof on Blend S and Nobuyuki is meant to be an exaggerated parody of Dino and there will be a song in this one, Bon Appetit by Blend A.***

**(We open up on the girl Hunters and Adam, exiting a taxi in front of a café.)**

**Setsuna Mikoto:** So, um, why are we here, 'Noka?

**Hinoka Kodomo:** This place is owned by an old really eccentric friend of my mom. I think his name was...Nobuyuki Kenichi? He said he wanted us specifically.

**(They enter the café. It's dark, and clearly hasn't been opened yet.)**

**Nia Troy:** Hello? Mr. Kenichi?

**(Silence. Then...)**

**Nobuyuki Kenichi:** Ah, so glad you could make it!

**(Everyone turns towards Nobuyuki, a man in his early thirties with dark green hair and a business suit. A coy smirk is on his face.)**

**Nobuyuki Kenichi:** Ah, look at all of you. You're so beautiful. You'll do nicely.

**(He cups Trifa's chin, and she squeals and smacks it off.)**

**Trifa Liang-Mania:** *D-don't even think about it!*

**(Nobuyuki stares at her, then chuckles, surprising everyone.)**

**Nobuyuki Kenichi:** Ah, yes. Truly, I got some of the best.

**Hinoka Kodomo:** Wh-what are you *talking* about?

**Nobuyuki Kenichi:** You see. My workers called in sick days what with the recent flu epidemic.

**Nia Troy:** *\*incredulous\* All* of them?

**Nobuyuki Kenichi:** Indeed. But fortunately, Mizuno was so kind as to volunteer you all as stand ins, until the real ones can come back to work. Also it's just calling in a favor from her.

**(He starts heading up the stairs.)**

**Nobuyuki Kenichi:** Your costumes are in the back, along with your scripts. You start work today. Oh, and *do* make sure to get everything right. My customers absolutely *hate* whenever the fantasy is even the tiniest bit wrong.

**(He reaches the top of the stairs and vanishes from sight. Everyone stares after him.)**

**Yoruko Senju:** ...Wait, did he say *costumes*?

**(Cut to them all in lolita style maid outfits, Adam and Nia are both wearing wigs.)**

**Nia Troy:** You owe us big time for this!

**Hinoka Kodomo:** In my defense, I didn't *know* it was an anime cliche café!

**(All of a sudden, Nobuyuki opens the door behind them.)**

**Nobuyuki Kenichi:** Oh, you've done *such* a good job! If nothing else, at least people will get a *spectacle*!

**(He brushes his fingers over Nia's shoulder, causing her to flush.)**

**Nobuyuki Kenichi:** Alright, girls, a little rehearsal first.

**Nia Troy:** Why do you even have a place like this?!

**Nobuyuki Kenichi:** You see, I'm a hardcore otaku! And I want a place where other otakus can come and enjoy themselves while having good food!

**Yoruko Senju:** Does that include the reason for being a creep you old bag? My family's private police force and my relatives will come after you if you do anything weird.

**Nobuyuki Kenichi:** *\*flustered\** Sorry. I just get carried away...Also, who are you calling an old bag? I'm *thirty-one*.

**Yoruko Senju:** ...oh. Oops. Sorry, sir.

**Nobuyuki Kenichi:** Alright, girls, from the top. Nia?

**Nia Troy:** Er, yes?

**Nobuyuki Kenichi:** Smoothie.

**Nia Troy:** Uh....okay?

**Nobuyuki Kenichi:** Come on! Project the Undere type! Be more agreeable!

**(Nia looks at him with a death glare which causes him to freeze up with fear)**

**Nia Troy:** Alright....But mess with me and you'll be wishing you never met me.

**Nobuyuki Kenichi:** *\*trying to stay calm and not show that he's scared\** No no no no no. Sweetheart, you don't *threaten*. You smile sweetly and said, "Yes, master".

**(Nia jolts.)**

**Nia Troy:** I *WHAT*?!

**Nobuyuki Kenichi:** Sweetheart, it's *practice*. Now, be a good girl and get a smoothie.

**Nia Troy:** Okay, *\*clearly grossed out\** Yes Master.

**Noboyuki Kenichi:** Well that's an improvement. Well you allbetter hurry and get ready, don't break character! We're opening soon!

**(Everyone grumbles. Cut to some customers entering the cafe)**

**Girl Hunters and Adam:** *\*deadpan\** Welcome to Cafe Fantasia!

**Customer 1:** Oooookay...Not how they usually greet us...they sound alittle deadpan...

**Customer 2:** A *little*?

**(Nobuyuki is watching from the top of the stairs, scowling.)**

**Nobuyuki Kenichi:** If this goes poorly...I don't think they'll be fond of Plan B, but that's the way the cookie crumbles.

**(Cut to the cafe filling up with more otakus. The Giel Hunters and Adam go around, trying their best to stay in character. Valeria and Jewel failing to pull of the Twincest trope, Amber not knowing what to say, Adam accidentally exposing that he's a guy, Ife accidentally messing up references, Kagami getting grossed out by some of the customers, Yoruko apologizing for the sadism, Trifa trying too hard to be a tsundere, Adolpha, Nia and Setsuna messing up rgeur lines and Hinoka constantly humbling herself despite her Princess type character. Meanwhile, Nobuyuki is in his office laughing and face palming at the same time.)**,

**Nobuyuki Kenichi:** This is going downhill. But its so funny! Alrght I guess it's time for plan B. All workers! Emergency meeting!

**(Cut to Nobuki's office.)**

**Nobuyuki Kenichi:** There's one way left to save the day! That's plan B, and I know you guys aren't gonna like it but, it's time for a musical number!

**Girl Hunters and Adam:** WHAT?!

**Yoruko Senju:** You know what that's it! I'm calling my Uncle, General Taiyo Senju! He'll be drafting you the moment I tell him!

**Valeria Cyprian-Hopebringer:** Yeah, we're pretty sure by this point that you're some weirdo who gets off to this stuff.

**(Nobuyuki looks at them all with a straight and honest face)**

**Nobuyuki Kenichi:** Kids! Hear me out for a moment alright? Look I know I come off as a creep but I just wanted this place to be like a place us otakus can feel at home. But I really like this place, and I get super excited cuz I want you guys to feel the same way I do when I'm able to help other otakus feel awesome even if it's just for one day. But really, Hinoka, your mom thought you and your friends could try doing something different for a change and maybe go on a mission that doesn't involve fighting, so when my workers all got sick she volunteered you guys. So yeah...

**(They all stare at him. Trifa sighs.)**

**Trifa Liang-Mania:** You're right.

**Nia Troy:** I understand now, I mean I'm down for helping out but you should've told us sooner, and we could've known why.

**Nobuyuki Kenichi:** It's alright kiddos, we all make mistakes and judgements. Now don't we have a musical number to prepare for?

**(Cut to stage in the cafe, the curtains go up. Que Bon Appetit by Blend A. . The girl Hunters and Adam are singing the song and doing kawaii dances. The otakus start nosebleeding as they perdorm.)**

*Smile・Sweet・Sister・Sadistic*
Surprise・Service・We are STILE!!

*Now open the door, get yourself into an unknown paradise*
Let's experience it, come on come YOU
It waits for you, a mysterious oasis
On a rewarding daily basis, it's a very little bit Spice

*Spinning, spinning, stirring it around*
Rolling, rolling, our prideful flavor
Service service, it's prize time
Hospitality, put it in your heart

*Welcome to…*
WAI! With us, dazzle yourself in a wonderful daydream
Affection is increasing, kindly patting we'll work with our hearts

*YES! I wonder if we can help you with a healthy charge*
I feel that these feelings also
Aren't surprisingly bad, right?

*Buono Buono I want to blend*
To you with Love!Love!Love! Your heart with a Punch!Punch!Punch!
Buono Buono I want to blend
Does it suit your taste? I hope so!♪

**(Just then the other guy Hunters walk in.)**

**Foxx Otur:** So...is this the place Aunt Mizuno mentioned? She wanted us to check up on them here.

**Lupe Bound-Amitola:** Must be.

**Foxx Otur:** I wonder what's going on here. She was sobbing her eyes out when we saw her....

**(Cue flashback, Mizuno is panicking and crying.)**

**Mizuno Kodomo:** It was a mistake! I should'nt have volunteered them for thy sort of work environment full of weird people who get off to stuff like that!! What if something inappropriate happens to them?! PLEASE GO CHECK ON THEM FOR ME!!!!

**(Flashback end)**

**Hachi Nile:** I dunno what she's so hysterical about.

**Vidyut and Akihiro:** Yeah it doesn't look too bad in here-

**(The guy Hunters see the girls and Adam on stage just as they finish their performance. Cue awkwatd silence. The other guy Hunters burst out laughing hysterically.)**

**Nia Troy:** THIS IS NOT FUNNY!!!

**Guy Hunters:** GYAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! LOO AT YOU GUYS!!!

**(They start rolling on the floor. Suddenly Mizuno teleports in amd leaps straight at Nobuyuki.)**

**Mizuno Kodomo:** DID YOU OR THOSE WEIRDOS DO ANYTHING TO MY BABY AND HER FRIENDS?!

**Hinoka Kodomo:** Mom! We're fine calm down!

**Mobuyuki Kenichi:** I was about to say that my workers are coming back tomorrow, they're fine now and that we're done foe the day....

**Mizuno Kodomo:** Oh....Sorry. I guess some old habits die hard.

**(The giel Hunters and Adam leave the cafe and the screen fades black. The post ceedits scene shows Yuzuki laighing at something on his phone in his room, Hinoka comes in to see what is so funny.)**

**Hinoka Kodomo:** Hey whatcha looking at?

**Yuzuki Kodomo:** 'Noka! This is hilarious!

**(It turns out to be a video of her and the others' performance at the cafe. Hinoka with a deadpan expression awkward slides out of the room leaving Yuzuki confused. And the screen fades black for the final time.)**