"I don't like heights"

### Preface

Fanfic by Abi about Session 31 from Zeema's perspective of the first occurance of the Talgrex Moon.

### "I don't like heights"

I lurch awake as a vine twists around my neck. I feel my body being lifted by the force of the vines constricting around me. I try to pull at the vine at my neck but my arms are held by the vines tight at my side. The force holding my head breaks without warning, and I fall back slightly. I can hear them yelling something, breaking the vines. After another moment I’m free, coughing. What the fuck was that. Mavka and Helio are shouting about the fireplace, but I can’t do anything but hold myself as I breath heavily.

The vines stopped, apparently. We all are grouped back, and Mavka asks Helio why he was near the fireplace last night. I’m so confused, what the hell does the fireplace have to do with this? Helio softly speaks, “I’m so sorry. I didn’t have a choice.” Helio did this? Anger builds in me, but the group pulls me into a hug as they console him. He didn’t have a choice, I know this, but I couldn’t do anything. I was helpless.

The group leads me outside, gasping at whatever the hell they can see. I tug at Gossamer, “What is it? Will someone please explain what the fuck is going on?”

She hesitates, “We-We gotta go now” and she pulls me forward.

She continues to pull me as we start to hit up against a crowd, “The sky turned red, and it’s getting darker. Just hold on Zeema... We gotta make it to the tower.” She sounds panicked? No, just hurried. I’m slowing her down.

We push through the crowd, but someone knocks against me and I fall to the floor. I feel the boots stomp on my back as people yell and run through the city. Gossamer pulls me back up, grunting, “I see Caeli up ahead… we’ll meet her there.”

We continue towards the direction of the tower, I assume. Suddenly, a crackling boom shakes the ground, and I hear craters? Boulders? Something is smashing into the ground, the impact sending shock waves through the street. People are screaming and crying. What is going on?

Gossamer messages Caeli and Helio, they seem to be safe, but safe from what? She’s silent for a few seconds, as if calculating something, and then continues to pull me through the crowd, “I think we’re too late, the beam of light already hit the tower and it kinda exploded.”

I try to pull her back, “Then why are we still going there? Shouldn't we run?”

She seems unwavering, “We have to help everyone. Caeli and Helio are already heading to the tower. We can’t leave them.”

I grip her hand tighter, “I trust you.”

As we continue forward, the ground seems to pull apart as we’re thrust to the side. All I can hear are the screams. Some screams fade as they get quieter. They’re falling. They’re falling into the earth. Before I can fully understand what’s happening, something falls onto us, slamming us into a building. I can feel the blood trickle down my neck as I reach up and feel the gaping wound on my head. I won’t make it out. I already knew that. I start to shake as the pain consumes my thoughts. Gossamer traces a circle on my head, and I feel the wound close enough that I can think.

“Is there a way out?” I can’t hide the fear in my voice. I know I won’t make it.

“Water is starting to flood into the city. We need to get to high ground now... Come on, we’re getting on the roof. Now,” she frantically shoves me up onto a roof as I grip onto the ledge.

That fear builds and builds. “Gossamer, I don't like heights. We should get back down.”

She won’t listen. She pulls me forward, and I feel the roof shingles slide and slip with the rumbling earth. I won’t make it. I feel my body continue to shake as Gossamer pushes me up another story.

“I don’t like heights… I don’t like heights,” I say, almost pleading for Gossamer to find another solution.

“We gotta keep going, we’re gonna die if we don’t.” She sounds so sure. So sure that we’ll die. I’m holding her back. Why won’t she just leave? Doesn’t she understand that I will be the reason we die? She could jump through these rooftops easily. I’m slowing her down. My legs shake uncontrollable, and I feel my tears seep through my blindfold. I can tell she’s slowing down. We’re going to die this way.

“Gossamer, there has to be another way out,” I plead, but she doesn’t respond as she uses her amulet to message Kendrick.

“Kendrick says there’s a portal on the south side of the city… we’ll head there.”

She’s not listening to me. As she pulls me toward the edge of the roof, I pull back, “You need to leave me here. I’m just a handicap. I can’t jump from building to building, I’m blind!”

“No, you can make it. I can help hold you, we can jump. We have to try, let’s just...”

“If you try to take me with you, I’ll jump off this building!” I have to convince her to leave, I won’t be the reason anyone dies. “I don’t like you! Just leave!” I reach out and find some part of the building to hold onto.

“Zeema, please, we have to go!” She tries to pry me off the wall. An idea clicks in my mind. I hold onto Gossamer, focus my energy and mutter in draconic to cast fly on her. She has to understand.

Gossamer stops resisting, “I’m sorry.” I cast catapult and her voice carries in the air as she flies through the sky.

She’ll make it. This was the only way. I can feel the building start to give in, I knew we wouldn’t make it if we stayed here. I can hear the screams, the rushing water, the cracking earth, the pounding fear in my head. I hold on tighter. With Gossamer gone, I don’t hold back my tears as I sob. I will die here alone.

“ZEEMA!” Gossamer’s voice. Shit. Why did she come back? “Mavka can cast water breathing, I can take us to her.”

“Why won’t you leave!” As she touches my arm, I shove back hard, casting catapult again. I can’t hear her as a wave crashes into the building. I can’t find the place I was gripping before, and start slipping. I reach out, grasping at the air. I can’t see. I can’t see. I fall, sliding down and off the roof. I scream as I crash into the rushing water below.

There is a stillness as the current pulls me under. My lungs begin to burn as I focus on the muffled echoes of chaos that weave through the water. Debris in the current pulls me deeper to my grave. It’s quiet.