Papa Texas

> "First, I take control of the mines. Then, I threaten to destroy them unless the governments of the world make me their ruler! It's foolproof!"
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> - Papa Texas on his plans for world domination
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Yung Texas, known better by his alias **Papa Texas,** is the main antagonist of *Brooding-Ninja-Highschool-Parkour-Scout: The Video Game.* Papa Texas is a psychotic Texan who runs the biker gang known as the Dallas Cowboys who wants to take over the world through ice cream tacos.

## Role in the Video Game

### Act One

Papa Texas kicks off the game's plot by kidnapping the President of Choco Taco Academy because he wants to take over the Choco Taco mines under the school and the world's supply of Choco Tacos. Papa Texas goes out of his way to antagonize Brooding-Ninja-Highschool-Parkour-Scout and his friends because he is supposedly the only one who can defeat Texas. After successfully launching Brooding-Ninja-Highschool-Parkour-Scout to Onecountrystan, Texas hires the help of Bananarama and his Hell-Generals, Rear Admiral Fights, and pretty much everyone that isn't loyal to Brooding-Ninja-Highschool-Parkour-Scout.

### Act Two

After Brooding-Ninja-Highschool-Parkour-Scout begins his escape to Othercountrystan with the help of Zippy and Dengar, he sends his Big Biker Sentry to take them down at the border. After the demise of the Big Biker Sentry and Saracho's unexpected meddling with the checkpoint gate, Texas decides to kidnap Betty and threatens to give her actual character development. After the Scoutlings get to the airport and prepare to head back to FREEDOM LAND, Texas arrives with Rear Admiral Fights at his side, taunts the Scoutlings, and rides back to Choco Taco Academy while Fights prepares to monologue Brooding-Ninja-Highschool-Parkour-Scout to death.

### Act Three

After Brooding-Ninja-Highschool-Parkour-Scout defeats Fights, Papa Texas flips his shit and started pulling out all the stops upon the Scoutlings' return to their home country. It is here where Texas takes the key to the gate of Choco Taco Academy and gives the pieces to the Hell-Generals. After overpowering them all, Brooding-Ninja-Highschool-Parkour-Scout makes it to the gate, where Papa Texas, out of options, throws Bananarama at them. This does not work, and Papa Texas is forced to fight the protagonist himself.

### The Final Battle

After a long, dramatic, and painful fight, Papa Texas uses the MacGuffin Muffins he had hidden in his pantaloons to absorb the power of the Santamen and becomes Grandpapa Hyper-Mega-Super-Ultra-Extra-Giga-God-King-Texas. Texas is defeated in his ultimate form and gets crushed by Brooding-Ninja-Highschool-Parkour-Scout summoning Robot Jesus to slam the Moon on him like a basketball, foiling his plans as he earned a front-row seat to the Space Jam. Despite this, he vows to return to antagonize the Scoutlings.

 The theme that plays before fighting Texas.

Papa Texas's first form's theme.

Papa Texas's final form's theme.

 Papa Texas's final form's theme for when he is on less than a quarter of his health.

## Powers and Abilities

Papa Texas can use Power Nuggets far more efficiently than Brooding-Ninja-Highschool-Parkour-Scout or his friends, but that pales in comparison to his mastery in ranged weapons. When fighting Texas, he uses a wide variety of pistols, shotguns, rocket launchers, and especially assault rifles. In addition, being an Engineer means he can create buildings, which translates in-game to him building quick Sentry Guns to shoot Brooding-Ninja-Highschool-Parkour-Scout, Dispensers to throw at his adversary for insane damage, and Teleporters to warp in his comrades in arms. Papa Texas also has a more powerful form about which very little is known.

## Voice Actor

Papa Texas is voiced by Hulk Hogan in the game, and by Johann Sebastian Bach during his cameo in the anime.

## Trivia

* Papa Texas wants to take over the world because he wants to gain the ultimate street cred: "Höchsteoberherr of der Welt" (Highest/Supreme Overlord of the World).
* Papa Texas is the half-son of Yung Venuz. This makes him one-sixth Gun God, one-sixth Venusian, and two-thirds Texan.
* Papa Texas is considered to be the most dangerous villain of Brooding-Ninja-Highschool-Parkour-Scout due to his belief in the Scoutlings being a threat to the human gene pool (followed up by an appropriate reaction).
* Papa Texas used to have a right-hand man, but he was killed very fucking slowly because he suggested that Texas shave his beard (which is not only a bad idea, it's an impossible task).
* Texas shows up on the 'Continue?' screen of the video game, where he is preparing to shank the hell out of a tied-up Brooding-Ninja-Highschool-Parkour-Scout while taunting him. Continuing the game has him accidentally drop the knife on the rope, while letting the continue timer run out has him plunge the knife directly into Brooding-Ninja-Highschool-Parkour-Scout's face, the screen cutting to red just before impact.

 This is the theme that plays during the continue screen. The last bit plays when you don't continue.