X-Men

The **X-Men** is an evil organization comprised of gangsters and big guys, with the fartudinous Wario as the head. The organization was originally found by his father in 1971, with a much different cast than today (most of them being dead).

## Activities

Their activities regularly consist of robbing places, harassing the Fantastic Four, being at war with the Koopa Mafia, and failing at doing things. The old generation of the X-Men did some more things, like drug deals and even some terrorist acts.

## History

### **The Past**

#### *Part 1: From (Un)Humble Beginnings (1971-1989)*

Mr. Frankith was in some sort of mafia before founding his own sort of mafia in 1971. Since he was the captain of said mafia, he already had the experience to run his own, which helped his mafia grow quickly. Soon enough, Frankith managed to get the likes of Ganon, Duke Onkled, George Bush Sr., and the fathers of Donkey Kong and Homer Simpson, among a few others. Their activities were mostly the same as the X-Men of today, but they did a lot more, such as drug dealing. They maintained their member count until 1975, when Ushrom got killed by the guy he scammed money out of. They got another member shortly afterwards, called Boshi, and another guy called Petey Piranha. Things slowly went downhill from there. Ganon was slain not once, but two times. First time was by Link, and the second time was by Zelda. Shortly after the second defeat, Duke Onkled was found as a traitor of Hyrule, and King Harkinian found him guilty. The guards sent Duke Onkled to prison. Hectan was ordered by Mr. Frankith to rescue Duke Onkled, but Hectan was immediately caught with the help of Link and sent to prison, too.

In 1982, Mr. Frankith's son, Wario, was born. He was always meant to be the heir of the X-Men. Shortly after, in 1984, Walgi was born. He was meant to be the co-leader, but after the unfortunate accident, that ultimately went to Wario's step-brother, Waluigi. As for the other fathers, they all wanted their sons to be in the X-Men, too. One of the fathers was sent by Mr. Frankith to kidnap Pauline, but he ended up almost getting himself killed by the hands of Mario. Cranky Kong never returned out of shame for his failure, and moved back to the country. Finally, in 1989, George H. W. Bush became president of the Un-Ited Estates of 'Murica, and he wasn't able to be in the X-Men. He sent his son, George W. Bush, to become a member in place of him.

#### *Part 2: The Rise of the Fantastic Four (1991-2001)*

Unknown to the rest until 1991, I.M. Meen has been the captain of a child sex trafficking ring. Abraham Simpson overheard I.M. Meen speaking on the phone one day, asking if the children had been successfully shipped. He decided to tell Mr. Frankith about what he heard, and then Frankith called I.M. Meen in his office. I.M. Meen lied successfully, but then Abraham decided to dig further. He snuck into I.M. Meen's house, and found evidence of his involvement in the ring. I.M. Meen came home before Abraham could escape, and they had a gun fight, with Abraham being the winner. He then left an anonymous tip to the cops about I.M. Meen, and soon enough, I.M. Meen was put away for a long time. He told Frankith what happened, and needless to say, Frankith was shocked and glad that he got what he deserved.

In 1993, H. W. Bush stopped being president, but he stepped down from the X-Men entirely and left W. Bush to them. In 1995, Mario, Luigi, Yoshi, and Princess Peach started something called the Fantastic Four, which is a group made to combat the X-Men. Meanwhile, Mr. Frankith got himself two more members, Bowser and his cousin, Cowser. Things went to an all-out war from there. The X-Men and the Fantastic Four fought almost non-stop, the FF stopping almost every plan they have. Meanwhile, in 1998, Wario and Waluigi officially joined the X-Men, along with Abraham's son, Homer. 1999 is when Wario had the secret X-Men hideout completed, and he kept it a secret for now. It was somewhere in the forest. During 2001, Boshi and Petey Piranha were slain by Yoshi and Mario. Because of this, Cowser left out of fear, but Bowser didn't ever leave, and he even brought some of his minions along to help. This included Kamek.

Also in 2001, George W. Bush became president, and he did something they never expected him to do: expose all of the X-Men's dark secrets on live TV. Mr. Frankith then got a call from H. W. Bush, saying just to run. Frankith asked questions, but he said there's no time for him to answer, as he was being chased down. Frankith heard gunshots off the phone, and the line went dead. It turns out that George W. Bush was never on their side, which made sense because he never directly helped the X-Men in any way unless he had to. He was pretty much forced by his father to join. Now, he's taking revenge.

#### *Part 3: On the Run (2001-2009)*

For as long as George W. Bush was president, the X-Men were wanted nationwide. They were chased down to Meggyco. The pain didn't stop there, oh no; there was a bounty out for the X-Men, and bounty hunters from many gangs were all over them. Even after they escaped Murica, they were still on the run, scrambling from place to place. This is when they met Donkey Kong, who fought alongside the X-Men and helped them in the crisis. They finally found a place to lay low, where almost nobody lived except for a guy called Nim-Nom. He would annoy the crap out of them at first, but then they shut him up, and Nim-Nom ultimately left the area. Things were all going well until August 2006.

Someone finally caught up to them, but it wasn't just any other bounty hunter. It was the Fantastic Four themselves. A big fight was held, with both sides noticeably struggling at times. Finally, when it looked like the Fantastic Four was about to win, Wario pulled out his secret weapon: Garlic. Eating Garlic turns him into Wario-Man, an invincible form of Wario that lasts five minutes. That was more than enough time to kick their asses. The Fantastic Four retreated, and told the president what happened. George W. Bush decided that Garlic is too dangerous to keep around, and ordered everyone in the Estates to burn Garlic. This new law was met with some controversy, but nevertheless, most of the Garlic in the world was gone by 2007.

Even more unluckily for the X-Men, the government has secretly sent word to literally every bounty hunter to ever live in Meggyco, with $1,000,000,000 as the reward. They all fought for the reward as they went to their destination. The X-Men were already running as they saw the approaching bounty hunters, knowing that their location has been compromised. They ended up escaping Meggyco entirely, going on a nearby island to live on until 2009, when George W. Bush had to step down from being president.

#### *Part 4: Current Days (2009-)*

Mr. Frankith decided to step down from being leader, and made Wario the leader. Homer's father, Abraham, decided to retire too, but from the X-Men entirely. Abraham decided to stay in the island while the X-Men moved back to 'Murica. Wario bought a cheap house which doubles as the X-Men's lair. Mr. Frankith went somewhere else, promising to aid the X-Men in any way he can, and made himself technically retired. From then on, the new generation of the X-Men has been running the show. They didn't do some of the crazy stuff that the old generation did, but they did rob and harass the Fantastic Four some more. Wario does make his share of mistakes more often than not, even more than his father, and some of his plans ended up in failure. But even though he wasn't a perfect leader, the X-Men still hung on for the rest of the decade. This can be considered the rest period, as nothing really major happens to the X-Men. 2020 came by, and a brand new war has started...

**The Super Wario Bros. Wah-wah Show!** **(SPOILER WARNING! Make sure to read the episodes first!)**

One day, the X-Men threw a party for the Koopa Mafia, and then the Mafia ended up trashing the party. The Koopa Mafia is a vigilante organization that defeats evil organizations in reverse alphabetical order. They trashed the party to indirectly tell the X-Men that a war has started between them. Wario accepts the challenge. The first thing the Mafia did is interrupt their next robbery, which is at a candy store. Then they hatched a master plan to force Wario to close down his organization. Basically, they kidnapped Waluigi, made WaWaluigi using his DNA, and sent him to accompany Wario until Wario is sure that he's an impostor. Once Wario realized this, the Koopa Mafia surrounded him, holding Waluigi hostage. But then, Bowser and Donkey Kong saved the day, and helped them with the ordeal. Wario had to transform into Wario-Man again, and he killed almost all of the Goombas and Koopas that worked for the Koopa Mafia (who didn't have Speed Shoes on).

Just when it was over, the second-in-command, Some tiny moron that nobody cares about, convinced Wario to create WaWario. WaWario, of course, happened to be good, which resulted in another fight. Suddenly, during the fight, the cops came, along with Mario and Luigi of the Fantastic Four. Wario failed to pay his disgruntled neighbor, Mr. Jenkins, so Jenkins decided to tell the cops all about the X-Men. Homer Simpson shot the police commander from afar just as he read the X-Men instructions, and then Homer ran alongside the rest of the X-Men. Wario had no choice but to retreat his team to his secret hideout that he built in 1999. It is where they reside, for now...

## Members

### **Current**

* Wario (leader)
* Waluigi (co-leader)
* Homer Simpson
* Bowser
* Kamek
* Goomba
* Koopa
* Boo
* Donkey Kong
* Mr. Frankith (founder and former leader, technically retired)

### **Former**

* Ganon (got sealed, TWICE!)
* Hectan (got sent to life in prison)
* Duke Onkled (got sent to life prison)
* Abraham Simpson II (retired)
* Ushrom (R.I.P.)
* I.M. Meen (got sent to jail)
* George H. W. Bush (retired, got shot dead when his son became president)
* George W. Bush (betrayal)
* Cranky Kong (quit out of shame)
* Boshi (R.I.P.)
* Petey Piranha (R.I.P.)
* Cowser (left out of fear)

## Trivia

* There is always some room for new people to join. This is because the leader prefers that the X-Men be as big as they possibly can.
* Ganon can get unsealed, but since Ganon's most important minions are dead or trapped, it is nearly impossible for someone to unseal him.