Total Drama: Worst of the Worst

Total Drama: Worst of the Worst is the tenth story in the main canon, though chronologically the ninth, and a reboot of the unfinished story of the same name. This season revolves around twenty-six poorly placing contestants from seasons past competing for a shot at redemption.

## Teams

### Black Swans

Blair

Grace

Hae Won

Holly

Isabella

Patsy

Quimberly

Ruth

Tamira

Yuko

Zoe

### Raging Bulls

Anders

Angelo

Brent

Cary

Dirk

Evan

Frederick

Herman

Isaiah

Jerome

LeVar

Logan

Luke

Reginald

Skylar

## Chapters

### Chapter 1 - Simply the Worst

A swarthy man walks from a newly arrived boat. He tilts his head upward to take in the view. The island that had become so closely linked to his hosting career before him. He removes his expensive sunglasses as he looks on at the island with a slight frown. Two people walk down the dock in order to greet him. A woman, with a slight burgundy tint to her hair, greets, "Welcome back, Mr. McLean. You’re looking as handsome, as ever."

Chris responds, "Oh, go on, Esme."

Esme continues, as she looks down at a clipboard, "You may find it of interest that the contestants are about to arrive."

Chris frowns and laments, "When I said to go on, I meant about how handsome I am, but... thanks for the info." The host cracks his neck, making Esme cringe. "Introducing contestants is easy when you’re a professional, like me." Chris points at himself with one of his thumbs. The tall male present rolls his eyes.

Esme elbows him in the stomach, making him let out an ‘oof’. She whispers, "Behave yourself, Zane. We don’t want to upset Mr. McLean when he was gracious enough to hire us on."

"I only agreed to this," Zane begins, "because you promised that their would be a lot of babes this season."

Chris announces, "The first contestant is here."

Esme nudges Zane and states, "You will not be disappointed. Wait til you see the first contestant."

A very good looking contestant steps off the boat. Tears stream down Esme’s face. "Even more gorgeous in person."

Zane sighs and agrees, "I wish I could tell you that you were wrong."

Chris introduces, "Say hello to the perfect in every way, Angelo." Chris blinks after reading off the index card.

Angelo blushes slightly. He assures, "I don’t know about all that, but I appreciate the kind words." Angelo smiles, the glare from his white teeth making Chris instinctively put his sunglasses back over his eyes.

Zane leans over to whisper to Esme, "You wrote that, didn’t you?"

"Shush," Esme responds. "I can’t hear Angelo’s muscles rippling over the sound of your voice." Zane blinks.

"Let’s meet our next contestant," Chris introduces. "She was a bundle of energy that inspired a lot of fans... to turn off the tv. That’s right. It’s Zoe."

Angelo smiles a little less wide. He admonishes, "That wasn’t very nice, Chris."

The fitness enthusiast tosses her bag off of the boat before doing cartwheels along the dock. She stops at Angelo. Zoe exclaims, "Hello, everyone! I’m back and ready to inspire the world!"

Angelo greets, "I’m Angelo. It’s great to meet you."

Zoe looks up and down at Angelo. She asks, "Chris? How am I supposed to inspire someone like this? He’s in better shape than me, and that’s not easy."

Angelo states, "Thank you, I..."

Zoe admits, "I’m excited to meet the rest of the cast, though. I’m hoping to meet some real chunkers."

Chris admits, "Esme was in charge of casting this season, so we’ll need to wait and see who she selected."

Zane blinks. "Then that means..."

Chris goes on, "Our next contestant is the pro skating playboy with a penchant for polyamory. It’s Evan."

Evan does a kick flip on his skateboard off of the boat, and rides down the dock to meet the other contestants. He says, "Hey, everyone. I’m glad to be invited back." He looks at Zoe. "Oh..."

Zoe puts a hand to her chest. She comments, "You’re even skinnier than last time. I’d like to think that I had a hand in that."

Evan scratches the back of his head. He replies, "You do know I had cancer, right?" Zoe seems to not be paying attention.

Chris states, "Well, if we’re ready to move on..." Angelo raises a hand. Chris asks, "Yes, Angelo?"

Angelo blankly asks, "Yes. I was wondering... what is polyamory?"

Zane mutters to Esme, "An assumed rise in your chances of dating this guy?" Esme smiles and flicks her wrist at Zane.

Evan blushes and admits, "Not exactly how I intended to start the season... again... But I’ve been known to be in relationships with more than one lady at a time, all with their knowledge and approval, of course. I’m newly single, however."

Chris adds, "How convenient, as we have ten more women to introduce."

"Leave some for me," Zane mutters.

In an attempt at changing the subject, Evan says, "Hey. You all wanna see me do a kick flip?" Evan leaps up before receiving a response, and is knocked out of the air and down onto the dock.

"Oh, yeah," Chris announces. "Dirk is here."

The muscular man with the glorious blond mullet has an arm around Angelo, who seems concerned about the fallen skateboarder. Dirk assures, "Don’t worry about that string cheese. Us athletic types know how to take a hit." Angelo reluctantly fails to assist Evan, as Zoe helps him to his feet.

Evan asks, as he holds his side, "I think you hit my spleen. This is my spleen, right?"

Dirk eyes his competition. He asks, "So you all went and cast an all male season? As it should be." Zoe raises an eyebrow as she looks around her.

"Don’t I wish," Esme says with a sigh. Zane looks at her with a raised eyebrow. "But alas, Chris would not allow it."

Zane waves at Dirk. Dirk nods at him. "Hey, bro. They let you compete on another season?"

Zane shakes his head. He explains, "Chris felt he needed some more involved assistants this season."

Chris corrects, "Unpaid interns."

Zane glares at Chris. "Right you are, sire."

Dirk slaps Zane on the back. "Well, it’s good to see you, again. Looking good... for a string pole." Dirk lets out a hearty laugh.

Zane winces, rubs his back, and replies, "Yeah. You, too, bud."

"Next up we have another Boney Island alum, Blair," Chris states.

Dirk asks, "Blair? I thought this was a season of memorable contestants."

"Gee, thanks," Blair responds. The curvy red head steps off the boat. "You’re no day at a picnic at the park, either." Dirk looks confused. Blair addresses the other contestants. "Uh... hey." A few of the contestants wave. "Truth be told, I do agree with Dirk-wad over here, to an extent. I mean, I think I was memorable, but for the wrong reasons. It’s just hard to view myself as worthy enough to be here. I look at some of you and think, you definitely should be here, but I’m going to put effort in to feel just as deserving. I’m also going to try my best not to blather on and on and on and on. I just..." Blair blinks, and face palms. "I’m doing it again, aren’t I?" The others nod. "Oh, darn."

Zoe wraps an arm around Blair and smiles wide, as she looks up and down at her. Zoe assures, "I’m sure we’re going to be the best of friends."

Blair smiles. She says, "You seem nice."

Esme pokes Chris in the ribs and he jolts awake. He looks around quickly. He notices a newly arrived boat. "Oh... I think this is going to be Frederick."

A handsome man steps off the boat and claps his hands. He looks around and seems embarrassed. He picks up his luggage and explains, "I’m used to people doing this kind of thing for me." He saunters over to the other contestants. He looks at Zoe and then Blair who smiles and waves at him.

The outspoken Blair says, "Hi, my name is Blair. I remember you from Total Drama Tropics, but you seem different somehow..."

Frederick explains, "I was a far more dreary person back then, but I have put much effort into having a more positive demeanor." Frederick smiles showing off his straight teeth. "Nobody wants to be with a sourpuss."

Blair holds a hand to her chin. She replies, "No. That’s not it. I swear. It’s as obvious as the nose on your face." Frederick frowns.

Chris announces, "Our next contestant is here." A glamorous looking girl drops her large luggage off of the boat. "Host of the web series, ‘Boujee on a Budget’, this is Tamira."

"Hello, darlings," Tamira states, as she holds a hand out toward the other contestants. Angelo reaches out, only to have Dirk slap his hand down. Angelo looks at him with raised eyebrows. Tamira kisses her hand and flicks it in the direction of the other contestants. "It’s such an honor to be here."

Angelo assures, "Getting another chance is such a privilege."

Tamira eyes Angelo. She says, "I’m not complaining, though I am a happily married woman. But why aren’t you wearing a shirt, or whatever?"

Angelo blushes a little. He explains, "Though I wasn’t on the show for very long, I have been able to use my small platform to start a non-profit charity. We do our best to provide shirts to those unable to afford one, but there are still millions roaming the streets completely topless."

"I feel like I would have noticed that," Evan comments.

Angelo continues, "I choose not to wear a shirt to help raise awareness."

Tamira asks, "What’s the charity called, darling?"

Angelo smiles and answers, "Give a Shirt." Some of the others laugh. Angelo blinks and asks, "What?"

"What a distinct pleasure to meet such a lovely lady out here," Frederick states. "And I’ll have you know that I use my vast fortune for charity all the time. I round my purchases up to the nearest dollar on occasion." Frederick steps up, takes Tamira’s hand, and leans down to kiss it, before pausing to glance at her inexpensive ring.

Tamira pulls her hand away, and assures, "Charmed, I’m sure. But I am not looking to make... friends out here. The prize money is why I’m here. It would help my family."

Frederick smiles and replies, "How noble of you." Frederick pulls an expensive looking watch from his pocket. He holds it up toward Tamira, and asks, "Would you care to know the time?"

Tamira mutters, "Hopefully it’s time for the next contestant."

Chris nods and states, "Indeed it is. Another old timer from Total Drama: Boney Island, Grace."

The unimpressed black woman steps off the boat and comments, "I know you’re not calling me an old timer, Chris McLean." Chris smiles nervously. Grace looks over at Dirk. "What’s he doing here?"

Dirk crosses his arms and frowns. "I’m not too happy to see you, either."

Grace rolls her eyes and responds, "I bet you say that to all the girls."

Dirk pauses to think. He states, "You know... I think I do..."

Grace struts toward Blair, and greets, "Hey, girl. Good to see you, again."

Blair squeals and replies, "Ohmigosh! I’m so glad to see you, too. I don’t know what to say!"

"Let’s leave it at that, girl," Grace responds. Blair nods.

Chris states, "Our next player is here, the recently outed nerd, LeVar."

A confident black man in a tight science fiction reference shirt makes his way off of the boat. "What’s up, losers?"

Dirk still has his arms folded as he mumbles, "You’re on the loser season, too."

LeVar confronts Dirk, "What was that, Goldielocks?"

"I... uh..." Dirk reacts. "I like your shirt?"

LeVar nods, and states, "Sounds about right." LeVar walks along.

Dirk lets out a heavy sigh and leans toward Angelo. He whispers, "Black guys make me nervous."

Angelo’s eyes widen. He says, "I don’t think you can say that." Dirk raises an eyebrow as he looks at Angelo.

LeVar settles near Frederick, Grace, and Tamira. He smiles and says, "I’ve always been a fan of older women."

Grace rolls her eyes and says, "I’m not interested in babysitting."

LeVar assures, "Oh, I’m all man. I turned eighteen two days ago, I’ll have you know." Grace looks disturbed. LeVar puts his hands together and starts popping his pecs. "Check out these man steaks."

Grace blinks and says, "This is just... wrong."

Tamira pulls her sunglasses down. Frederick notices and adds, "Uh..." he pulls something from his pocket and states, "Look at my cutting edge, state of the art flip phone!" Some of the contestants sound impressed. He holds it up, flexing his arm, as he states, "If I hold it up like this, I almost get a signal." Some of the others gasp ‘oooh’. He and LeVar continue flexing.

A woman’s voice says from behind, "Is this some bizarre, Canadian mating ritual?"

LeVar and Frederick slowly change the direction of their stares. They quickly fall to their knees and chant, "We’re not worthy!"

The pretty, purple haired woman commands, "Stand up." They quickly follow her request. They look over at her nervously. "No eye contact." LeVar looks to the opposite side, while Frederick looks skyward. "That’s better."

LeVar glares at Chris and asks, "Why didn’t you tell us Quimberly was here?"

Chris shrugs and admits, "It’s more fun this way."

"Well... pack your bags ‘cause I’ve already won," Quimberly quips.

Blair sighs and agrees, "She’s right. Fortunately, I didn’t start unpacking, yet." She and a few of the others pick up their bags and begin to walk toward the boat.

"Hold up, hold up," Chris states. "I know it’s unlikely, but technically you all have a shot at winning."

Blair looks at Chris with her eyes sparkling. She asks, "You really think so, Chris?"

"Of course not," Chris responds.

"That’s fair," Blair assures.

Chris finishes, "But you all just leaving now would be fairly anticlimactic, and you’d be robbing the public of more episodes of Quimberly." The contestants nod and set their belongings back down.

Chris views the next contestant arriving and introduces, "Now meet the prodigy novelist, Patsy."

Patsy exits the boat and she turns to the boat driver and dramatically states, "Here’s looking at you, kid." The boat drives away. Patsy turns to the contestants and says, "Of all the reality shows, in all of Canada, I had to wind up on this one." She pulls her luggage behind her and stands near the other contestants. She looks up and down at them and pulls out a small notebook.

Chris introduces, "Just arriving is the utterly average Brent."

The young man walks over to the other players and says, "Hey, guys."

Patsy looks at him and comments, "You were just what I needed for inspiration for my next novel."

"Oh, yeah?" Brent asks. "I’m flattered, really, but..."

Patsy explains, "I had trouble fully realizing a door mat, but now I know just how to describe it."

Brent blinks and replies, "Thanks, I think."

Dirk assures, "I don’t care what they say. Your pecs are definitely above average."

Brent blinks and replies, "Thanks, I think... again." Brent looks over at Angelo. "Oh, hey, man." Angelo smiles and nods.

"This is truly riveting stuff," Chris states with a yawn. "My index cards say that Yuko should be here by now, but someone else is definitely on that boat."

"Aw, I loved Yuko," Zoe sadly admits. "She’s so petite."

Chris states, "Instead, let’s give a warm welcome to fan favorite, Anders. I mean, if we don’t, his fan base may threaten violence."

A very tall, muscular, fair skinned, blonde man steps off of the boat. "Hello, every buddy. Anders is arrived!" A few of the contestants clap in excitement. He awkwardly saunters down the dock, and steps up to the other contestants.

"When did you get so jacked?" Dirk asks with wide eyes.

Anders looks confused. He states, "Anders is Anders, ja? I am not familiar with this... Jack?"

Tamira has her hand over the bridge of her nose. She explains, "Anders, he means when did you get so muscular."

"Ah!" Anders says in realization. "Thank you for explaining to me, friend. Anders learns of ‘nother chance at big reality contest long time ago..."

Brent admits, "I wish I had that much of a heads up. I would’ve worked on more than my pecs."

Anders continues, "So I get big muscles to stomp on competition." Anders stamps his foot, causing one of the planks of wood on the dock to shoot up, hitting Brent in the crotch. Brent screams out in pain, and falls forward with his hands between his knees. The others look at him with wide eyes.

Patsy states, "I heard a scream! It came from over here." Patsy holds up her magnifying glass and looks in the opposite direction of the incident.

Brent looks up and sees Yuko standing behind Anders. Brent pleads, "Please... Send help..."

Yuko winces and explains, "Ooh. I wish I could, but I’m here solely as a casual observer." Anders turns and smiles blankly, as Yuko is completely hidden by his large frame.

Chris interjects, "The next contestant has arrived. It’s the artist extraordinaire, Ruth!"

Ruth carries her suitcase on her way to the others. She says, "What an inspiring group of contestants." She holds up a thumb and closes one eye as she looks at them. "Yep. Lots of potential." She notices Angelo, "Oh, hey... What happened to your shirt?"

"He gave it to a hobo," Frederick answers. Angelo blinks. "My name is Frederick." He smiles wide. "I would be more than willing to fund your next art project."

Ruth claps. She says, "My girlfriend will be so excited to hear that." Frederick briskly walks away, as Ruth looks after him with wide eyes.

Evan steps up and asks, "So you have a girlfriend, huh?"

Dirks pushes Evan down, again, uttering, "Whoops."

Ruth looks down, and notices Brent still huddled on the dock. She asks, "Brent? Is that you?"

Brent utters, "Help... me..."

"Wait here," Ruth directs. She rummages through her things and pulls out a sketchbook. "Hold that pose." Ruth proceeds to draw the injured contestant as a single tear streams down his face. Ruth adds, "Ooh. Nice touch."

Chris introduces the next player. He states, "This farm boy didn’t get much screen time, but he was still very memorable. It’s Luke."

Evan stands up and greets, "Hey, man."

"Oh, hey, buddy!" Luke grips Evan’s hand tight, causing him to fall to his knees. "Oh, sorry there, pal."

"It’s alright," Evan assures as he stands back up after Luke lets go.

Luke asks, "So your momma was good with you being on this season?"

Evan rubs the back of his head and explains, "I’m old enough to make my own decisions this time."

Luke slaps Evan on the back and adds, "Atta boy!" Evan falls forward again, as Luke looks down with wide eyes.

Chris states, "We have another contestant to introduce. It’s all about appearances with Jerome."

A well groomed black man exits the boat and makes his way to the other contestants. Grace gives him a thumbs up as Dirk says, "Hey, Jerome. How’ve you been?"

"Doing well, boo," Jerome answers.

Angelo turns to Dirk and asks, "Jerome doesn’t make you nervous?"

"You mean the black guy thing? Jerome doesn’t count," Dirk insists with a laugh. Angelo raises an eyebrow.

Luke holds out a hand and greets, "I’m Luke. Pleased to meet you."

Jerome glances at Luke, and then covers his eyes with his hand. He insists, "Hey, Johnny Longtorso. The pattern on that shirt is giving me major motion sickness."

Luke looks down at his orange and red checkered shirt and states, "Oh. Sorry, chum. I thought it was a nice, friendly lookin’ pattern. But I’m down with the sickness. Consider it gone." Luke removes his shirt and leaves it to be taken by the wind, revealing a white tank top and pronounced tan lines.

Jerome frowns and states, "What’s with the wife beater over the other shirt?"

Luke looks down and asks, "Other shirt? And I don’t have a wife."

Blair waves at Jerome and says, "You wouldn’t remember me, but we were on the same season together."

Jerome responds, "Oh, Blair. I wish I could forget that lipstick shade and shirt combination." Blair frowns. Jerome turns his attention toward Ruth. "We didn’t want to pick just one color, did we?"

Chris announces, "Here’s Missy’s sister, Holly."

Holly walks up in a white uniform and says, "Hey, everyone. I hope we can be friends."

Ruth arches her eyebrows and responds to Jerome, "I’m not the one serving golf dad realness, Mr. Fashion Gestapo."

Jerome narrows his eyes, and retorts, "Nice underwear. Didn’t have enough space in your luggage for your floss?"

Holly utters, "Eep!" She quickly turns around and walks away from the group.

Ruth taunts, "Where did you get your stubble? From a can."

Jerome narrows his eyes even more. He opens his eyes wide and laughs out loud. He puts an arm around Ruth and acknowledges, "Girl. You’re crazy." Ruth laughs, as well, and the pair of them walk off together.

Luke looks from side to side and asks, "What just happened?"

"I don’t really know," Chris admits. "But it was awesome!" Chris notices the next contestant’s boat arriving. "Hey, everyone. Say hello to Isabella."

Isabella walks to the others as some of them greet her. Luke and Evan glance at each other. Evan insists, "Chris, I think saying hello might be ineffectual."

Isabella signs as she speaks. "Hello, everyone. I’m glad to be invited back."

Zoe looks at Chris and asks, "Wait, is she deaf?"

Evan blinks and reminds Zoe, "You were on the same season."

"Were we?" Zoe asks. She shrugs her shoulders and admits, "I just remember that black haired, prison guy."

"I’m pretty sure you’re the only one," Evan replies.

Luke attempts to sign with his tongue sticking out. The caption reads, "Hello, Isabeffa."

Isabella smiles, signs, and says, "You’ve been working on your sign language. Nice effort."

Angelo signs. The caption reads, "Welcome. I admit that I’m a little rusty, but I’m glad to have an excuse to work on my sign."

Isabella seems impressed. She signs, "It’s actually very good. When did you learn to sign."

Angelo signs his explanation, "There was this elderly, deaf nun I met when I was three, and I was helping her find the missing convent kitten. I felt bad that I couldn’t communicate with her better so I taught myself sign language."

"You’re funny," Isabella signs. Angelo looks confused. The others look at the two with blank expressions.

Blair sighs and insists, "I know they’re talking about me."

Luke scratches his head. He signs, "Pizza. Thank you. Applause."

Chris shrugs his shoulders and states, "I think things got a little derailed. Next up we have Hae Won, the bringer of vengeance, who didn’t get a chance to do... much of anything."

Hae Won frowns as she drags her luggage behind her. The silver haired Asian states, "I see you’re still an expert at introductions."

"Why, thank y..." Chris begins.

Hae Won interjects, "That was sarcasm." Chris frowns. Hae Won goes on, "So, allow me to tell you all a little bit about myself. You can insult me all you want, and I won’t bat an eyelash, but when you..."

A lean, brown haired man in an extravagant three piece suit and top hat steps forward balancing three large suitcases on top of each other. He steps in front of Hae Won and states, "Greetings, friends. The name is Skylar, and I like to keep things balanced. Get it? Because I’m balancing stuff?" Skylar shrugs one shoulder and states, "I guess they can’t all land." Hae Won raises an eyebrow before ducking down. Skylar begins to juggle his pieces of luggage. Some of the other contestants applaud as they watch him. As he walks forward, Skylar falls, dropping his suitcases onto the dock. Hae Won stands back up, and steps back.

Chris reads off of the index card, "That was circus performer, and pitfaller, Skylar."

"He certainly does fall down a lot," Luke observes.

Patsy leans in with her magnifying glass and comments, "Somebody tied his shoelaces together."

Hae Won laughs and admits, "Okay, maybe I will avenge myself, sometimes."

Patsy says, "Yeah, I have no idea who did this." Hae Won blinks. Patsy points at Holly and interrogates, "Where were you... thirty seconds ago?!" Holly’s eyes widen and she rushes to the other side of the dock. Patsy rubs her chin. "Very suspicious."

Zoe puts a hand on her chin and says, "Hey, Chris... I’m not thrilled about the cast this season. I mean... everyone is so thin or healthy looking." She eyes Blair. "Almost everyone."

Chris shrugs and explains, "You can blame my new assistant, Esme. She’s responsible for the casting this season." Esme blushes and nods.

Grace rolls her eyes and adds, "Typical Chris. There’s always someone else to blame."

Chris pulls at his shirt collar. He announces, "We only have one contestant left to introduce. It’s the abrasive, but grossly misunderstood twin, Cary."

A tan, blond man in bright yellow clothing steps off of the boat. He smiles wide and says, "Hey, everyone! Man, what a fantastic opportunity to spread joy to the world." Chris looks down at his index card and blinks. Cary sets down his bag.

"All the boys and girls, now..." Skylar responds as he stands up. He rubs his head. "Wait, what are we talking about?" Skylar looks at the cast. "There’s a lot of people from a lot of different backgrounds. Let’s do our best to get along." Cary smiles wide.

Hae Won looks at Skylar and says, "You really like interrupting people, don’t you?"

Cary smiles blankly and assures, "I don’t mind." Zoe looks up and down at Cary. "I hope everyone can win!"

Grace looks at Tamira and says, "He does know that’s not how this works, right?"

Zoe lifts up Cary’s shirt and pulls out a body fat caliper and pinches his oblique with it. Cary looks down with wide eyes. Zoe holds up a thumb toward Chris, and adds, "Good job with this one, Chris!"

Chris smiles and says, "I take full credit." Esme holds her clipboard tightly to her chest as she looks away from Chris with a frown.

Cary forces a smile and states, "What an... eclectic way to greet someone." Zoe pulls Blair closer and has her arms around her and Cary.

LeVar eyes the cast. He states, "This is everyone, huh?"

Quimberly comments, "This is going to be a piece of cake."

Chris assures, "We have a lot of twists and turns planned, so don’t get too comfortable, yet." Chris gestures toward Esme and Zane. "These two have been where you were. Feeling hopeless, depressed, and completely pathetic at your their poor placement."

Zane insists, "Hey, I made it to ninth place, once."

Chris gestures again toward Zane. "See? Bragging about placing ninth after three tries. Pure denial." Zane folds his arms and glares to the side. "So who better to serve as my assistant hosts, this season?"

"You need assistants?" Jerome asks with a frown. "It’s not like you do much."

Chris insists, "The stakes are higher than ever. The winner will receive a whopping fifteen million dollars!"

"Whoa!" Skylar reacts. "That would buy a lot of circus peanuts."

Hae Won looks confused, "How can a sleazy show like this afford to give away that much money?"

Chris admits, "Not paying the interns helps."

Tamira assures, "That much money would change my life."

Frederick smirks and says, "A mere drop in the bucket for me."

Ruth narrows her eyes and asks, "So why are you here?" Frederick looks to the side.

Chris faces the camera. He states as he holds his arms up, "Welcome to an all-new season of Total Drama! There will be thrills, chills, and shocking eliminations."

Cary leans toward Isabella’s ear and whispers, "How does he know that last part?" Isabella turns toward him and looks at him with a raised eyebrow.

Chris states, "Forget everything you thought you knew about Total Drama, as this season will be chock full of surprises. Get ready for the all-new, Total... Drama:... Worst of the Worst!"

### Chapter 2 - Search Party Poopers

The ruggedly handsome main host, Chris McLean, is shown applying makeup in front of a mirror. He pauses for a moment, and he turns his eyes toward the camera. He stands up abruptly, and barks, "We’re rolling? Why didn’t anyone tell me?"

"Uh…" a timid, red haired intern responds. "I did, Mr. McLean. Like five minutes ago."

Chris responds with a smile, "My bad. I’m sorry."

The intern responds, seeming less nervous. "That’s okay, sir. You don’t need to apologize. You must have not heard me."

Chris lets out a laugh. He assures, "Oh, I wasn’t apologizing for that. I’m apologizing, because I’m firing you."

The intern’s eyes widen. He shouts, "What?! I have a family to feed! A family of cats… but still a family!"

Chris blinks his eyes. He asks, "You do know you’re an unpaid intern, right?"

The intern nods and reveals, "I was taking home the liver pâté from craft services…" Chris looks back at him, blankly. The intern adds, "I’ll pack my things."

Chris shakes his head. "This is Total DRAMA Island, bro."

The intern pulls a piece of paper from his pocket, looks down at it, and replies, "I thought this was Total Drama: Worst of the Worst."

"The point is," Chris continues, "we need your exit to feel more… raw."

The intern thinks back, "Like the liver pâté?"

Chris frowns. Two burly interns appear behind Chris. The hostile host snaps his fingers and commands, "Get him, boys!"

One of the burly interns replies, "Er. Just to clarify, Mr. McLean, I am a woman."

Chris clears his throat. "I knew that. Get him… people!"

The interns crack their knuckles and drag the smaller, red haired intern away. He yells out, "You have not heard the last from me! Do you hear me, Chris McLean?!"

Chris McLean adjusts his hearing aid. "What was that, now?"

"You will regret this, Chris McLean! Mark my words!" the intern yells out.

Chris nods and smiles. "Haha! That’s more like it." Chris turns toward the camera. He states, "Welcome to our second episode of Total Drama:…" He squints to read a cue card. "Worst of the Worst! Last time, we welcomed our twenty…" The host squints, again. "Does that say twenty-two or twenty-three?"

Zane, one of the assistant hosts, puts a hand over his face and asks, "Why would it be twenty-three?"

Chris ignores the comment and goes on, "We welcomed… a number of contestants, all from past seasons who did… questionably on their original season." Chris laughs. "Let’s face it. They stunk!"

Zane laughs from off camera and agrees, "Yeah, they did."

Chris stops laughing and glares toward Zane. "Given your track record, you haven’t earned the right to laugh." The laughter from off camera ceases. Chris smiles. "Today, the contestants will be divided into teams, compete in their first challenge, and vote for the first person to be sent packing. Let’s see it all play out on Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst!"

The contestants walk up to a grassy area from different directions. Esme, the burgundy haired assistant host, is standing in front of the contestants, holding her clipboard. "Thank you for reconvening." She explains, "Mr. McLean has tasked me to be the one to announce teams."

Dirk looks over the contestants. He asserts, "We have a good looking bunch of guys this season." He furrows his brow. "If one of us doesn’t win, I’ll eat his shorts." He points at a surprised Angelo.

Quimberly responds, "Then bon apetit. Any one of these women could wipe the floor with you."

"Hey, that’s super nice of you to say," Isabella assures, as she signs.

Quimberly shrugs and clarifies, "Not really. It’s more on account of how pathetic the guys look, than any merit on your part." Isabella blinks in response.

Quimberly is shown in confessional. "Even though this season is called ‘Worst of the Worst’, I was expecting some sort of competition… Maybe there will be a late arrival. I almost feel like competing will be a waste of effort." Quimberly flips her long purple hair.

Esme looks down at her clipboard. She comments, "It’s funny that you mention it. This season, the teams will be divided as men against women."

Dirk’s eyes widen, as he holds his hands over his mouth. He says, "This is literally a dream come true."

Blair states, "This is exciting! We definitely have a strong team of women."

Frederick has his arms folded. "This twist is labored, at best. Gender based teams are so sexist."

LeVar nods and points at Quimberly. "Right. We have, like, zero chance against her." Most of the other guys nod.

Dirk says as he places an arm around Frederick’s shoulders, "Come on, dude! Who needs women? We’re going to have a great time."

Frederick frowns and says, "How positively saccharin." He lifts Dirk’s arm off of his shoulders and drops it beside him.

Evan assures Frederick, "I know it might be a challenge, bro, trust me. I’m used to being around lots and lots of women." Frederick raises an eyebrow. "Okay. Maybe that was a humble brag. But dudes can be cool, too… Maybe in different ways, but we can make it through this." Evan holds his hand up with his palm open. "Up top, big guy." Frederick leaves Evan hanging, as he fixes his gaze elsewhere. A menacing looking Dirk takes hold of Evan’s hand and puts forth a great deal of pressure in squeezing it. Evan’s eyes cross as he squeals, "Gyaaaah!" and quickly falls to his knees.

In confessional, Evan looks down at his bandaged hand. He admits, "I don’t think that Dirk guy likes me."

Dirk is shown in confessional with his arms folded. "I don’t like that Everett guy."

Luke adds, "We’ll be sure to make the best of our situation."

"That’s the spirit," Cary assures.

Cary is shown in confessional. He admits, "Last time I was on the show, there was a bit of conflict with the guys. It brings up some sad memories, but I’m really going to do my best to be positive, and do my best to break up any potentially tense situation." Cary forces a wide smile.

Ruth assures, "I personally like the teams… Speaking of which, what are our team names?"

Esme explains, "Mr. McLean thought it would be empowering for you to come up with your own team names."

Dirk rolls his eyes and comments, "’Empowering’ is a woman word." Several others blink.

The groups huddle together. The women are shown discussing their team name.  Zoe suggests, "How about ‘The Femme Fatales’? I think that shows our strength." Zoe flexes a bicep.

"I like that name," Holly adds.

"I don’t know," Hae Won responds. "Why don’t we go with something animal related, like usual?"

"I like that idea," Holly replies.

"Is there an animal that people normally associate with women?" Grace asks. "I’d like to keep a theme that sets us apart from them." Grace looks over at the other team.

Ruth follows Grace’s gaze, landing on LeVar bent over facing away from them. "How about a cougar? That seems fitting for Grace in particular." Ruth smirks.

Grace frowns. "I’m far more reserved these days, but I am not afraid to throw hands." Holly’s eyes widen, as she steps away from the huddle. Grace looks after her and asks, "What’s her deal?"

Holly is in confessional. She states, "Last time I was eliminated because the other contestants thought I was secretly evil, like my sister. This time my strategy is to avoid conflict as much as humanly possible. I’m not afraid to remove myself from an uncomfortable situation. There’s no way they can possibly consider me anything like Missy this time." Holly gives an unsure smile. "It’s not awkward, at all."

Esme asks, "Okay, everyone. What have you decided for team names?"

Quimberly announces for her team, "We would like to be referred to as ‘The Black Swans’." The other members of The Black Swans cheer.

Esme nods as she writes down the team name. She looks up and asks, "Gentlemen? May I hear your team name, please?"

Dirk calls out, "Team Sausage Fest!" Esme’s eyes get wide.

Anders wraps an arm around Dirk and puts a hand over his mouth. "Don’t listen to him." Dirk’s eyes widen as he looks at Anders.

Skylar states, "Our team name is ‘The Raging Bulls’." The other guys cheer with deep ‘whoop’s.

Anders releases Dirk and apologizes, "I’m sorry. I know what it once was to say many stupid things, so I acted without thinking."

Dirk eyes Anders up and down. He says, "Dude… You are shredded." Anders blinks.

Skylar explains, "He means muscular."

"Ja," Anders replies with a nod. He places a hand on the back of his head, causing his bicep to bulge from within his jacket. "Muscles are good for competition, ja?"

Esme nervously taps on her clipboard with her pen, her cheeks looking a little red. She instructs, "An intern will guide each team to their cabins, where you can drop off your things. You’ll find a costume within that will be worn by the team member of your choice. They will serve as the star of the challenge, which will take place later today." Esme looks over and says, "Ah. There are the interns." Two intensely handsome interns walk up.

Jerome raises an eyebrow. He looks over at Esme and asks, "You hired these two, huh? Same old Esme."

Esme places a strand of hair behind her ear. She responds, "I have no idea what you’re talking about."

"Mm-hmm," Jerome responds, with a smirk.

The teams begin following the interns. Isabella heaves a sigh and acknowledges, "We’ll be in a cabin. Just like old times. This is really bringing back memories."

"Not for me," Patsy replies. "We had these bungalow things on our season."

Hae Won agrees, "Yeah. I mean, for what little time I spent in it."

Hae Won is shown in confessional. She has her arms folded as she glares to the side. She recalls, "Total Drama wasn’t exactly a highlight of my life. All thanks to… I don’t want to think about… him. I’m more defined by what I accomplished after the show. Finishing high school, college… Starting my own business teaching self defense courses, my taser that also holds pepper spray, and those masterclass courses I teach online on how to spot an abusive boyfriend. Yup. My life has had very little to do with my time on the show."

Isabella looks over at Ruth. Ruth responds, "Don’t look at me. On my season, we lived in these Wendigos, or whatever."

"Wendigos?" Blair asks with wide eyes.

The handsome Latino intern points at the cabin. "We have arrived, ladies."

Hae Won responds by grabbing his arm and flipping him to the ground. She then stomps on his stomach, causing him to cry out ‘Oof!’ The others look at Hae Won with wide eyes. She asks, "What?"

Zoe asks, while doing squat thrusts on the steps, "Um, isn’t violence strictly forbidden on this program?"

Grace shakes her head and explains, "Interns are fair game. That’s how Chris gets away with abusing them." The others look at Grace with confused looks. She asserts, "I cannot be the only one who actually read the contract."

From the ground, the injured intern says with a voice crack, "I know I sure didn’t."

The women step over the twitching intern as they enter their cabin. They set their things down in their preferred areas. Patsy looks at a black bag hanging outside of the closet and states, "It appears to be a body bag. This season is definitely going to be more intense."

Tamira puts a hand on Patsy’s shoulder. She says, “Oh, sweetie. That’s a garment bag."

Patsy looks puzzled and responds, "I don’t think so."

Tamira unzips it, and explains, "It’s like that lady host explained. One of us will wear this costume and play an important role in the challenge." The others look beyond Tamira with horrified expressions. "What is…" Tamira turns and her jaw drops down. "It’s worse than I could have imagined."

Yuko looks down as a note falls to the ground from the garment bag. She looks around as no one seems to notice it.

The guys are shown in their cabin. Dirk hits Angelo on the back and exclaims, "I am so excited, brothers! This is going to be the best season ever!" Angelo looks over at Dirk with a slight smile.

In confessional, Angelo admits, "I was not expecting to get along with Dirk, but his positive attitude is admirable."

Frederick states, "I find it only fair that we use the democratic process to determine where we each will slumber."

Cary smiles wide and admits, "That seems like a good idea." Dirk whips off his shirt and walks past Cary.

Frederick goes on, "As the contestant clearly with the most money…" Frederick winces as he looks at Luke sticking a twig down the back of his shirt to scratch himself. "I should get first choice. And I want that one." Frederick points to a bunk bed near the door.

Dirk hops on the bottom bunk. He exclaims, "We’re bunk mates!"

Frederick acquiesces, "You can have it to yourself. The help failed to pack my fungicide."

Dirk laughs and reminisces, "Fun guys… That reminds me of my frat days." A single tear rolls down Dirk’s cheek. "Those were good times. Those dudes were literally the love of my life." Frederick rolls his eyes. Cary looks over at Frederick, with a less enthusiastic smile.

Cary looks around the confessional. He admits, "Something is up with Frederick. He seemed so pleasant when we all first gathered together, and now he seems especially irritable." Cary sighs. "I speak as someone who has experience with hiding their real feelings…" Cary forces a smile.

Cary slaps Frederick on the back. He assures, "You can share a bunk with me. Your choice on bunk."

Frederick shrugs his shoulders. He admits, "I suppose I have no choice but to live like the other 99%. I’ll take the top bunk." He reaches into his bag and pulls out a long sheet of paper. "This is a list of requirements for anyone I share sleeping arrangements with."

Cary laughs. He looks over the list and states, "This looks like a prenup. That’s hilarious…" Frederick looks back at the chipper, tan guy with a serious look. Cary quietly replies, "Oh…"

"Since we’re all situated," Jerome begins, "I suppose we need to decide who’s going to wear this fashion faux pas." Jerome gently gestures with a flick of the wrist at the hanging garment bag. He holds up a pair of bull horns, fur pants, and gold colored swim trunks.

Dirk volunteers, "I think I’ll look pretty hot in that. Reminds me of the time the guys dressed me up in the school mascot head, and nothing else… and then they left me in this abandoned parking lot." The others look concerned as they look at him. Dirk sighs reflectively. "What a night."

Skylar blinks his eyes as he turns his attention to the garment bag and asks, "How did they get a bull themed costume so fast?"

LeVar looks up and down at the costume. He states, "I wouldn’t be caught dead in that outfit. I don’t care if it is for a ‘special role’."

"Any other volunteers, before we decide through the ancient art of the ring toss?" Skylar asks.

Dirk frowns. He states, "I thought I just…"

Anders raises a hand and says, "Anders will do it."

Skylar frowns and responds, "Maybe we should ask Anders first before volunteering him."

Anders blinks. He points at himself and says, "I’m sorry. Anders is me." Skylar nods in realization.

Dirk looks at Anders and then at the costume. He nods his head rapidly and says, "I second that motion."

After the guys return to settling their things, Angelo walks over to Dirk’s bunk and throws his bag on the top bunk. He asks, "Is this bunk taken?"

Dirk puts his hands on his head and states, "No way, man."

Angelo smiles and replies, "If you rather I didn’t, that’s fine." He reaches for his bag.

Dirk puts a hand on Angelo’s arm and states, "That’s not what I meant. I just can’t believe you’d want to share a bunk with me. You are a one hundred percent, prime cut, grade A, top choice specimen of a team member."

LeVar rolls his eyes and says, "It’s just a bunk bed. It’s not like he agreed to hand you the money if he beats Quimberly in the finale." Some of the others laugh at the suggestion.

Dirk sits on his bed. He quietly states, "It’s not like that. Plus, she isn’t all that…"

Angelo slaps Dirk on the shoulder and insists, "Buck up, Dirk. We need your enthusiasm in this first challenge." Dirk smiles, nods, stands up, and punches Angelo in the stomach.

Dirk apologizes, "Sorry, dude. When I get all excited, all I want to do is roughhouse."

Angelo continues smiling. He assures, "It’s all good. I didn’t feel anything."

"That’s awesome!" Dirk exclaims. He turns around and holds up his throbbing hand as he winces.

In The Black Swans cabin, Tamira explains, "So by process of elimination, we’ve narrowed down the candidates of who will wear this monstrosity of a costume, i.e. those of us that don’t have images to protect. Blair and Holly, we’re down to you."

Blair shrugs and says, "I’ll wear it. I’m definitely prepared to do anything I have to do help my team, even if it means…" Holly lets out a sigh of relief, and smiles slightly.

"Yeah, we stopped listening when you said you’ll wear it," Tamira responds as she hands the garment bag to Blair.

"That’s fair," Blair replies with a nod. She walks behind a privacy screen to change into the garment.

After a few moments, Grace walks over and asks, "How you doing, sweetie?" Grace’s eyes widen as she looks at Blair.

Blair asks, "Perfect fit, right?"

In confessional, Grace explains, "There was no fitting that girl into that dress. So we made the executive decision to change Holly to the ‘starring role’. Shoot. I didn’t care about wearing the dress, as awful as it was." Grace shudders. "I just didn’t want to be targeted for messing up whatever that special role was." Grace smirks.

Back in The Black Swans’ cabin, Yuko frowns as she looks down at the envelope that has escaped her team members’ notice. She finally nudges Patsy in the arm. Patsy does not budge, as she looks down at her fingernails.

Zoe drops to the floor and begins doing push ups. She admits, "Nothing like a thousand push ups to get the adrenaline pumping before a challenge. Who’s with me?" The others remain standing. Zoe looks down. She pauses. "What’s this?" She picks up the envelope. Zoe stands and takes a note from the envelope and reads it to herself.

Isabella asks and signs, "What does it say?"

Zoe states, "Oh. It says there’s a set of five pound weights in the closet there. As an extra component to the challenge, it says Blair needs to carry those for the entire duration of the challenge."

"What?" Ruth asks. "That seems so random. Are you okay with this Blair?"

Blair grits her teeth and says, "Let me at them!"

Zoe is shown in confessional. She admits, "Okay, so I lied. The note didn’t name Blair specifically, it said anyone could do the extra task. I just narrowed things down for everyone." Zoe puts a hand to her chest. "It’s for the greater good."

Zane and Esme are seen outside as the male contestants, excluding LeVar, gather near them. Zane’s eyes widen as he sees The Raging Bulls dressed in togas. He asks, "What’s with the toga party?"

Skylar explains, "We got a note in the garment bag about making costumes for the challenge."

Dirk states, "The togas were my idea." He holds up a thumb toward Jerome. "My man and I, right here, made them. I’m kind of a toga making natural. Jerome did the sewing parts." Angelo smiles as he looks at them and nods.

Luke frowns. "Wait, was that not part of the challenge?"

Esme admits, "It must have been a last minute addition from Chris." Esme eyes the guys. "Not that I’m complaining." The contestants look at her with concerned looks. She clears her throat. "Moving on."

The female competitors, minus Holly, join the group. Frederick’s face drops. He asks, "Where are their costumes?" He looks down at his toga. "You mean we’re the only ones forced to wear these ridiculous get ups?"

Evan smirks and nudges Frederick with his elbow. Evan states, "You can admit it. You just wanted to see the ladies in skimpy costumes." Frederick folds his arms and looks to the side.

Isabella signs as she explains, "We had an extra task for the assignment, too. Blair is supposed to run around holding these weights." Zane looks at Esme who shrugs.

"That seems random," Skylar admits, his toga revealing his hairy arms and chest.

Zane goes on to explain, "So the selected contestants, Holly and Anders have been whisked away by our production team to two different locations. They are shackled up and will need to be released from their bonds with a key prepared for the challenge. The keys have been hidden somewhere on the island, as well. Whichever of those two team member returns here first will win invincibility for their team. If everyone is ready…" The competitors seem confused. "Get set… Go!"

The Black Swans and The Raging Bulls scurry off in order to find their captive team members. Zoe states, "I think we should split up. We can cover more ground that way."

"That’s not a bad idea," Isabella signs as she speaks.

Patsy calls out, "I call dibs on Yuko." She puts her arm around the Asian woman.

"Who?" Tamira asks as she pulls down her sunglasses.

Yuko admits, "I work alone."

Patsy protests, "Oh, come on. We will make a fantastic team." Patsy licks her thumb and holds it up. "I deduce that we should walk this direction." Patsy turns and walks directly into a wall. Yuko looks on and smirks.

Yuko is shown in confessional. She frowns and states, "I didn’t even realize that Patsy knew I was here. She doesn’t seem to be the most… observant." Yuko looks to the side. "I admit that it was sloppy of me to nudge her arm earlier... I’m not sure what came over me, but I didn’t want them to miss that note."

Zoe states, "I would be honored to be in a pair with Blair."

Blair looks surprised as she holds her arms out with the weights, running in place. She asks, "What? I’ve never been picked first before."

"I mean, technically, Patsy chose…" Grace begins.

Blair glares at Grace and says, "Let me have this." Grace holds her hands up.

Ruth comments, "What are we doing? We should have let Quimberly pick first."

Quimberly asks, "Are team ups required?"

"I mean that is what we agreed upon," Ruth replies. "But if you…"

Quimberly points at Blair. "I’ll take that one." Blair looks shocked. Zoe’s eyes widen.

"Me?" Blair asks.

Zoe says, "I don’t mean to make a fuss, but…"

Quimberly gestures at Blair with a nod of her head. She instructs. "Let’s go." Blair nods and runs after Quimberly. Zoe looks after them and frowns.

Tamira looks over at the guys team leaving in pairs. She states, "It looks like they had the same idea we did. I mean, not that I was looking at them, or anything."

Tamira states in confessional, "I was known to be a bit of a… flirt, my first go around." She smiles and wiggles her ring finger. "I am now a happily married woman, so there will be none of that this time around."

Evan and Luke are shown walking together in there togas. Luke admits, "I reckon I don’t know where to even begin looking. This island is a big’gun."

Evan laughs. "I didn’t know anyone still talked like that."

Luke is shown in confessional. He admits, "Evan and I became friends back in Total Drama Athletics, as brief as our time together was. It’s pretty funny on account of how I’m a country boy, and he’s a city boy. We couldn’t be anymore diff’rent."

Evan asks, "So are you still seeing that one girl? Polly whatever."

Luke shakes his head. "Nah. I think you’re remembering things wrong, on account of me never having been in a relationship."

Evan raises an eyebrow. "With how handsome you are?"

"Oh, stop," Luke says with a nasally laugh.

"I’m not joking," Evan assures with a smirk. "If I had your looks, I wouldn’t have to rely on my superstardom and charming personality to get dates." Luke lets out another loud laugh.

"Who are you kidding?" Luke assures. "You’re a looker." Evan smiles. "I think…" Evan’s smile fades.

Luke laughs and  asks, "So you said you were newly single." Luke elbows Evan’s arm. "Got your eye on anybody?"

Evan rubs the spot on his arm that Luke elbowed him on. "I see a few options, I guess."

Luke laughs. "You really are the ladies’ man. You can’t narrow things down to one. Oh, yeah. How’s your recovery been? Been back on the board?"

Evan admits, “It’s been a struggle. Things haven’t been the same since my treatment."

Luke slaps Evan on the back. He assures, "It’ll come to you. I mean, you’re looking good…" Luke pauses. "Like I said… I think."

Evan laughs. He assures, "Thanks."

Luke asks, "See any keys or that Anders guy?" Evan shakes his head.

Quimberly and Blair walk up to Holly, dressed in an elaborate Victorian gown and hat with a black swan atop, her hands restrained by handcuffs. Holly looks surprised. She says, "Wow! Great job. You got here super fast."

Quimberly states, "This game is way too simple." She points a thumb at Blair. "I was hoping the deadweight would slow me down, and provide some sort of a challenge."

Blair holds up her five pound weights and assures, "They really aren’t that heavy." Blair looks around, breathing heavily, and asks, "Is there a rock I can sit on, or something?" Quimberly and Holly begin walking, Blair quickly follows after them.

Holly asks, "Um, not to be pushy, but did you need to find a key for the handcuffs, or something?"

Quimberly explains, "Yes, but I figured we could take you to the key."

"That’s definitely forward thinking," Holly admits.

Quimberly nods. "I thought by that time, maybe the others would mess things up so badly that by the time we get back to where I figure the key is, it would be lost. But that’s best case scenario."

Holly blinks. She says, "If I were you I would have assumed I’d be immobilized by my restraints… If that makes sense."

Quimberly scoffs. "With this show’s production value? I figure they wouldn’t spring for more than one adequate set of restraints, and they would use the more elaborate restraints for one of the big names." Holly blinks.

Holly admits in confessional, "I honestly felt nervous about being selected to have the special role for the challenge, but I did not want to make waves." Holly waves her hands. Holly smiles. "It turns out that I didn’t have to do much of anything, and I am far from standing out."

Dirk and Jerome are walking together, as Dirk swings the key. "I’m glad we get to compete together, again," Dirk comments. "We make a great team."

"It’s hard to believe it’s been all these years," Jerome agrees.

"I was honestly pretty nervous, coming back," Dirk admits. "I was pretty wrecked last time."

Jerome shrugs and says, "You just need to man up, boo."

"That’s the…" Dirk begins. Dirk stops in place, and drops the key to the ground.

Jerome looks down in surprise. "What’s wrong?" he asks. Jerome looks up and sees Anders standing in furry pants, ill fitting horns, and shackled to a tree. Anders squints as he states, “Hello, ladies. Have you happened to see my team members?"

Jerome explains, "Hey. I may be a lot of things, but I am no lady. It’s me and Dirk."

"Ah," Anders responds. "I apologize. An intern took my glasses when I got here. They said it didn’t match outfit."

Jerome frowns and assures, "Honey, the outfit doesn’t match itself."

Anders laughs. "You are very amusing for a person." Dirk remains frozen in place. Anders asks, "Why is burly mullet man not moving?"

Jerome looks over at Dirk. He says, "Oh. Him? He’s got performance anxiety, or something. He’s afraid he’s going to choke, so he responds by…"

"Choking?" Anders asks.

Jerome shrugs and states, "Boo. It makes as much sense to me as it does to you." Jerome looks down at the key and bends over to retrieve them as his toga reveals too much.

Anders admits, "I am relieved not to be able to see your nether lands." Jerome stands back up and glares at Anders.

"Be happy I’m still going to unlock you after that remark," Jerome remarks. Jerome walks over to Anders and reaches to unlock his restraints. "Um…"

"Is Anders free like oxen?" Anders asks.

Jerome attempts to stand on his toes but is unable to reach the lock. "Remember when I said I was going to unlock you?"

Anders replies, "Ja?"

Jerome sighs and admits, "Looks like I should have worn my platforms."

At the starting point of the challenge, Jerome gently slaps Dirk’s face until he becomes alert, again. Dirk looks around wearily. He asks, "What happened? Did we win?" Jerome frowns and shakes his head. He points to The Black Swans, who are all assembled and cheering.

Holly grimaces and holds up her hands, free from the handcuffs. "Try not to hate me for this, guys," she requests.

Dirk frowns. He states, "We’re here because of me, aren’t we?"

Jerome assures, "I don’t know what more you could have done. I used your motionless body as a step stool to reach Anders’ restraints."

Anders, now wearing a shirt, continues, "And Anders carried your very sweaty body to here."

"And I missed it?!" Dirk shouts.

"Ja, and Jerome had to lead me back by the hand, as I could not see things," Anders continues. Dirk frowns and glares at Jerome.

Zane explains, "Holly, Quimberly, and Blair… I’m sorry. Quimberly, Holly, and Blair returned here without Holly’s handcuffs removed, but Patsy returned with the key before you all arrived."

Blair smiles and states, "And Quimberly thought the rest of The Black Swans were going to lose this for us… And she doesn’t seem to think the competition is challenging for her in any way." The others glare at Quimberly. Blair apologizes, "Sorry. It seems I’ve said too much." Quimberly seems to look indifferent.

Isabella signs and states, "Let’s hear it for Patsy and her key finding skills." The team cheers.

Patsy holds up the item and kisses it. "What can I say? I have an eye for detail."

Luke comments, "Criminy! I’m glad our key looked like a key and not a twig like theirs."

Zane laughs. He looks over at Patsy and states, "Yeah, that is fortunate…" Esme’s eyes are wide. Zane states, “It’s a twig, isn’t it?" Esme nods. Zane shrugs and says, "It’s no matter. They still unlocked the handcuffs, so it was ‘a key’ of sorts. Gentlemen, we will meet you at the campfire ceremony."

Brent gulps. He steps forward and states, "Zane. That is not right… ahem… sir." Zane and Esme look at each other for a moment and then back at Brent. "You said, and I quote, ‘They are shackled up and will need to be released from their bonds with a key prepared for the challenge.’ Not a makeshift key… Not a twig, or whatever. Very specifically a key prepared for the challenge."

Esme looks down at her clipboard. "He’s right."

Zane forces a smile. "I guess that means… The Raging Bulls win the challenge!"

Jerome has his arms folded, nods, and states, "That’s right."

Tamira looks at Hae Won and asks, "Wait… That means we lost?"

Zane looks embarrassed. He apologizes, "I’m sorry for the confusion, ladies."

Esme nods. She says, "Unfortunately, The Black Swans need to vote out a team member. We will see you at the elimination ceremony." The Black Swans head to their cabin to prepare for the elimination.

"Nicely done, guys," Esme states. She leans forward and quietly assures, "I was rooting for you." She waves before she and Zane leave the area.

Anders comments, "I am most impressed with average guy’s memory."

Brent protests, "It’s nothing. I thought that detail was sticking out like a sore thumb. I was super nervous, stepping forward, though."

"That made Anders so happy I could kiss you," Anders assures.

"Me, too," Dirk adds with a nod. "With consent, of course."

Brent looks down. He responds, "You guys are too nice."

Brent is shown in confessional. He admits, "I’m not used to all these accolades… I just felt like it was necessary to speak up… you know? I know this was just a fluke."

At the elimination ceremony, Chris is holding a tray of marshmallows. "So my team told me things went really smoothly without me there, so I’m glad to hear it." The contestants look at each other with confused looks. "As you know, the marshmallow represents your life in this game. The contestant not to receive a marshmallow will be eliminated immediately, and you must leave the island.’ Chris holds up a marshmallow and states, "This one goes to… Isabella." Isabella catches her marshmallow. "Next up is… Hae Won." Hae Won catches her marshmallow. Chris jokes, "This is a first for you." Hae Won glares at him, and makes a slicing motion across her neck. Chris blinks. "Uh… Moving on we have Tamira, Grace, Yuko, whoever that is, as well as Ruth, Zoe, and Patsy. Chris holds up one of the two remaining marshmallows. "This one belongs to… Blair."

Blair catches her marshmallow with her mouth dropped open. She says, “I am genuinely shocked! I thought I was radiating first out energy. But besides me are sitting Quimberly and Holly of all people! I just can’t get over the whole ordeal. When I agreed to this season, I figured that I was fodder for the more popular contestants to…"

Grace rubs the bridge of her nose. "Girl… This is not your moment." Blair nods awkwardly and pantomimes zipping her lips.

Chris states, "Two women sit before me. The final marshmallow goes to…" Quimberly looks at her fingernails, while Holly looks over at her with an uneasy look.

"Quimberly." Quimberly jumps up and does a backflip before she catches her marshmallow in her teeth. The others look on wide eyed and applaud.

Holly looks disappointed as she sobs. She frowns and admits, "I did my best to stay away from any conflict. I can’t believe I was voted out again because you thought I was evil like Missy."

"Oh, honey," Grace responds with a frown. "We didn’t vote for you because we thought you were secretly evil."

Holly looks a little less sad as she sniffles. She asks, "You didn’t?"

Blair states matter of factly, "Nah. We voted you out because she won the last all stars season." Holly’s eyes widen as her lips quiver and then she begins to sob some more. Grace slaps her own forehead.

Tamira rolls her eyes and says, "Way to go, Blair."

Blair winces and mouths ‘sorry’ as Holly takes her things and heads to The Boat of Losers.

Holly is shown on The Boat of Losers. Between sobs, she states, "I can’t… believe… that  Missy… was the reason…. I was sent home first, two times." She sniffs a few times. "At least, I’d rather go out first than make it farther and not win."

Chris is shown standing to face the camera. "With that, the first of the worst is gone. More drama, exciting challenges, and surprises await as we venture deeper into our season. We’ll see you on the next Total… Drama: Worst of the Worst!"

Zane is shown supporting himself with his arms on the Camp Wawanakwa sign on The Dock of Shame. He takes a puff of a cigarette and exhales smoke as he looks at the island. Esme walks up. She waves her hand as she coughs through a second billow of smoke. Esme admits, "Smoking is a major turn off."

Zane frowns, as he puts the cigarette out on the sign. He apologizes, "Sorry. It’s been a while since I’ve done this. Today was… a lot."

"You did fine for your first time hosting a challenge," Esme assures. "There’s room for improvement, but you have potential."

Zane responds, "Thanks. I mean… I want to do a good job, but I can’t shake these damn nerves. You’d think I’d be way more comfortable with how many appearances I’ve made on here."

"You’ll get it," Esme insists. She forces a smile. "Maybe not next time… or the time after that…"

Zane frowns and asks, "Chris has me on probation, doesn’t he?"

Esme looks surprised. She says, "What? No?" Zane raises an eyebrow at her. Esme sighs. "Yes… for the next two episodes, I’ll be taking the lead when he isn’t available."

Zane admits, "Fair enough. I’ll be watching closely. Hopefully I can learn a thing or two."

Esme gestures head toward the island. "We should get back. We have a long day tomorrow." Zane nods, and the two assistant hosts walk back to shore.

### Chapter 3 - Total Treasure Island

Chris is shown in front of the camera. He smiles and states, "I welcome you to an all new episode of Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst! Last time, the show really got rolling with our first challenge and elimination. The teams were decided, it was guys against girls! The Black Swans versus The Raging Bulls! In our introductory challenge, the contestants had to select a mascot among their team members. That contestant then needed to be rescued by their team and unlocked from their shackles. The Black Swans won the challenge," Chris states. "Except someone made a hasty judgment call," the host then glares off camera, "So the men’s team, The Raging Bulls, were the real winners, and The Black Swans chose to vote out Holly, given that her sister won a season." Chris shrugs. "Not that Missy exactly seems like the type to share her earnings. As we continue to tonight’s episode, which team will win invincibility, and which contestant will be eliminated?" Chris raises his arms. "Let’s get on with the show!"

Tamira is shown in confessional. She states, "Seeing Holly go first was hard, tbh. I know I didn’t exactly pay much attention to the women on my first season, but we were teammates back then, too. We bonded after the show. I mean… I didn’t invite her to mine and TBD’s wedding, or anything, as I was not about to let her potential plus one, i.e. Missy, upstage me on my day." Tamira pauses for a moment. She adds, "And ftr, TBD isn’t my pet name for my Tobes… It’s his stage name, it stands for Toby Determined." She looks away from the camera. She looks back at it. "He’s an exotic dancer, a darn good one, too. I mean, he was never great at keeping his pants on, so he works that to his advantage… But ngl, he works at a very classy establishment." She looks away from the camera, again. She looks back at it. "The name of the club is The Junk Yard…" Tamira looks to the side and frowns. "I am definitely not ashamed."

Still at night, during the walk back from the elimination ceremony, Ruth asks Tamira, "So what does your husband do?"

"He plays a lot of racing video games," Tamira answers. "He is also a hobbyist mechanic." Isabella looks on as she trails behind the others.

"Oh, cool," Ruth states. "I do installation art pieces, so that’s cool, but I meant, where does he work?"

Tamira puts on her sunglasses. She states, "He works at… The Junk Yard."

Ruth replies, "Oh, sweetness! I’ll have to stop by some time and check out some of the heavy machinery and toss a few dollars his way." Tamira winces before walking into a tree. Ruth looks on with wide eyes.

Tamira is in confessional, and states, "I mean, I wasn’t technically lying." She rubs a bump on her forehead.

In confessional, Isabella admits while signing, "The walk home at night, I could see the others bonding, but that’s about all I could see. Nights make it a lot harder to read lips and be part of the conversation. I wish I could have been able to communicate with them, but I’m not going to let myself get down about it. It’s a relief having Angelo here, though."

As the women walk past The Raging Bulls’ cabin, Frederick, Dirk, and Angelo are standing outside. Angelo signs something to Isabella as she passes, making her smile, and wave at him. Dirk looks over with a furrowed brow. Frederick states, "I’m so sorry that you lovely ladies had to experience an elimination." He places a well manicured hand with an expensive looking ring on his chest. "If any of you would like to commiserate over a moonlit stroll, I would be more than happy to lend a shoulder." He rolls up a shirt sleeve to reveal a broad shoulder. Cary walks up to the guys.

"Blow it out your fake nose," Hae Won chirps.

Frederick frowns, but then smiles and adds, "Your sense of humor is most charming." He holds up a gold bracelet that reads ‘EvanSent’, and adds, "Would anyone be interested in this trinket? I happened to pack far too much expensive jewelry, and wouldn’t want it to go to waste." Tamira looks over at Frederick with a slight smile, as Cary looks at him with a confused look.

Dirk steps over and grabs hold of the bracelet. He states, "Gee, man! That’s so generous of you. I’ll think of you when I wear it." The women walk into their cabin, as Frederick watches them with a smile. When they close the door, he turns back with a frown and grasps the bracelet.

Dirk doesn’t let go. Frederick pulls back, and states, "The offer did not extend to you."

Dirk admits, "You’re pretty strong, bro, but I claimed this fair and square."

Evan walks up, and leans to look at the bracelet. He states, "Hey, no way. That’s the bracelet that my team sold during my health scare to raise money for cancer awareness. I never even got the premium version, just the little rubber ones."

Dirk looks at Evan. He asks, "Wait. That’s what the ‘EvanSent’ means?" Evan nods with a smile. Dirk promptly lets go of the bracelet, launching Frederick back and down the stairs. The other guys look down with wide eyes.

Frederick wakes up with a bandage around his head. He looks around and asks, "Where am I?"

Cary asks, "How many fingers am I holding up?"

"Five?" Frederick replies as he squints.

Cary looks down at the four fingers on his hand and forces a smile. "Close enough. Anyway… You’re in the medical tent."

Frederick looks panicked, feels his face, and asks, "How’s my nose? Is my nose okay?"

Cary nods and states, "It looks super. You just had a bit of a bump on your head. Nothing too serious."

Frederick removes the sheets from his bed and puts his legs to the side. "Good. I hate hospitals." He attempts to stand, but then wobbles. Cary stands to catch him, but Frederick falls and knocks a wide eyed Cary over on the way down.

After the staff helps Frederick back into bed and leaves, he admits, "It looks like my equilibrium was effected by my initial fall."

Cary shrugs and admits, "I think it’s the medicine they have you on. It should wear off, sooner than later, but it’d be best if you stay here the night."

Frederick looks at Cary with a frown. He asks, "What are you doing here?"

"Because we’re friends," Cary starts.

Frederick asks, "Maybe I suffered some sort of memory loss, but I don’t remember that. I mean, I barely remember you."

Cary maintains a forced smile. He finally drops the smile to a frown and admits, "Look. The other guys didn’t seem to care what happened to you all that much, and I felt guilty. As your teammate, I kind of felt obligated to come with you."

Frederick rolls his eyes. He responds, "Heartwarming. You can feel free to go, since you have no interest in being here."

Cary states, "I don’t mind, really. But… I can’t help but wonder… Why are you even here?"

"I hit my head," Frederick reminds. He raises an eyebrow. "Maybe you’re the one that needs an examination."

Cary shakes his head. He replies, “I meant, why are you even on this show? You don’t need the money. You seem miserable whenever the other team isn’t around…" Cary’s eyes widen. "You’re here because you want a showmance." Frederick’s eyes get wide. "That explains the plastic surgery you had done, I guess. Though you looked great the way you were…" Cary blinks. "And the way you are now…"

Frederick frowns. He explains, "It isn’t quite that simple. It’s more of a need than a want."

Cary looks confused. He admits, "I don’t really know what that means."

In confessional, Cary explains, "Frederick and I had quite the conversation, not that it would ever air." Cary smiles. "He made me promise not to repeat what he told me, but I will say that it made me understand his motives in being here… Not that I necessarily agree with them. He’s really not a bad guy… you know… deep down… maybe… deep, deep, deep, deep down." Cary blinks with a forced smile.

Quimberly is shown sitting on her bed. She brushes her hair as she laments, "I hope these challenges start becoming more interesting. I don’t understand the point of competing if it’s going to be this meaningless."

Hae Won groans. "Then why are you here? You can leave any time you want." The others look at Hae Won with wide eyes.

Quimberly raises an eyebrow, as mostly everyone ducks for cover. She states, "I’m not used to people talking back to me. I’m impressed." Quimberly looks out the window reflectively. "I don’t exactly need the money after that excavation of that ancient tomb I did, what with discovering all those numerous priceless artifacts." Quimberly pauses. "I suppose I have some thinking to do." The moonlight glistens off of her flawless skin. The others, including Hae Won, look at her in awe.

The following morning, Zoe is leading a group of contestants, made up of Anders, Angelo, Blair, Brent, Cary, Dirk, Isabella, Luke, and Skylar in morning exercises. Zoe calls out, "Good job, party people! Now touch your toes." The others present follow her direction. Angelo mouths something to Isabella, who smiles in response.

Skylar leans toward Dirk and asks, "I figured you would hate being told what do by a woman. Why are you here?"

Dirk points at Zoe and states, "You mean that’s not a dude?" Skylar shakes his head. Dirk goes on, "Besides, it’s all about the view, guy."

Skylar looks to the side at the lake sparkling from the suns rays. He asserts, "Yeah. I guess the view at this hour is gorgeous."

Anders turns his head back and asks, "How do you like Anders’ yoga pants? It’s like I’m wearing nothing at all." Dirk blinks as he looks down.

Skylar asks, "Hey, what was Zoe’s latest instructions?"

Dirk responds, "Huh? What was that? I got distracted."

Dirk has his arms folded in confessional as he complains, "Stupid, sexy Anders."

Back with the exercise group, Dirk then looks to his right and notes, "Hey, where did Angelo run off to?"

Skylar looks around and comments, "Isabella is gone, too." Dirk’s expression is blank. Skylar states, "Blonde hair." He gestures a little under his shoulder. "Hair about so long." Dirk blinks. "Punny t-shirts." Dirk looks lost. "On the other team." Dirk frowns.

Blair looks back. She is particularly sweaty. She turns back around, "Zoe sensei! Dirk and Skylar… are barely… breaking a sweat!" Dirk glares at Blair.

Zoe nods. "Thanks, Blair. Now drop and give me fifty." Blair nods and drops to the ground. Zoe pulls out a megaphone and yells into it, "Dirk and… Pitfall, pick up the pace!"

Dirk rolls his eyes and whispers to Skylar as they work out harder, "You know we don’t have to listen to her."

Skylar looks tearful. He says, "I’m known as… Pitfall?"

Dirk responds, "Yeah, pretty much everyone calls you that," as Zoe leads them in burpees. Skylar appears to put more effort in. Dirk looks over at him, and says, "You’d rather be known as Burpee Guy?" Dirk looks to the side. "Hey, I’m gonna bounce." He walks away. Skylar shrugs but continues with the exercises.

Skylar is speaking in confessional. He admits, "Part of my coming here was to help change my legacy on the show. I want to be remembered for uniting people, not falling down a pit. I mean it was just that one time… okay, it was two times. Thankfully that other time wasn’t televised…" Skylar looks to the side.

Isabella and Angelo are walking alone together. Isabella signs with subtitles on the screen, "It’s nice to have someone who understands me without speaking. That takes much more concentration."

Angelo nods. He signs, "I can only imagine." He pauses. He says, "Uh," and begins signing, "I like your shirt. It makes me question my stance on shirts." Isabella laughs.

Isabella admits through sign, "I wish you and I were on the same team together. I mean…" Isabella blushes. "It feels isolating not being able to sign with anyone on my team." The pair sit down on a rock together. She rests her head on Angelo’s shoulder. His face looks a little flushed. He gently places a hand on Isabella’s shoulder.

Angelo is shown in confessional. He looks down at the floor. "I… have never felt like this about someone before. Sure, I’ve had girls I’ve liked, but I’ve never fallen so hard and fast. I feel like Pitfall." He looks up and into the camera. "Some might feel that this relationship is not appropriate with our being on separate teams, but there was nothing in the rules that said we couldn’t… befriend the other team. I know I told myself I was going to play a perfect game this time around… but that doesn’t feel as important, now."

The scene changes back to Isabella and Angelo seated on the rock in silence. Dirk walks out of the forest at a distance. He begins, "Oh, Angelo, there you…"

Angelo does not notice Dirk, as Isabella leans in and the pair kiss. Dirk looks on with wide eyes. He slowly walks backward into the bushes.

Yuko is standing behind a nearby tree. She watches as Dirk walks back into the forest. She taps her fingers together and says, "Excellent. Things are about to get juicy."

Patsy walks up to Yuko and throws a hand around her shoulder. Patsy exclaims, "Hey, pal! What are you up to way out here?" Yuko’s eyebrows raise quickly.

Angelo stands up abruptly and signs something quickly to Isabella, who also stands up and looks in Patsy and Yuko’ s direction. Angelo calls out to them, "Hey! We were just taking a break from a little walk… How long have you two been over there?"

Yuko glares at Patsy who states, "Oh. I didn’t see you. Greetings. We just got here."

Angelo breathes a sigh of relief as he signs something to Isabella, who also looks relieved. Over the loudspeaker, Zane is heard stating, "Will the contestants please meet outside the cabins for your second challenge? I repeat. Please meet outside the cabin’s for your second challenge." Angelo signs to explain what was said over the loudspeaker.

Isabella is shown in confessional. She explains as she signs, "I’m glad Angelo was with me when the announcement was made. I wouldn’t have even known the challenge was happening if I were by myself." She looks down and smiles. "I was glad he was with me for other reasons, too."

The remaining contestants are gathered in front of Esme. The assistant host welcomes them whilst wearing a yellow princess gown. She welcomes them, "Good morrow, weary travelers."

"Please tell me this is not what we’re doing," Tamira says with a groan, and a hand over her face.

Esme goes on, "Today you will choose your costume and compete in an epic quest for  treasure."

LeVar pumps his fist. He states, "I call dark elf." The others look at him. He looks around and asks, "I cannot be the only one excited for this." He folds his arms and insists, "You’re not going to make me feel ashamed about this. This kind of stuff is going to be huge in the next couple of years, you mark my words."

Jerome looks up and down at LeVar. "Yeah, right. Next thing you’ll tell me is that superheroes are going to be a big deal, too." Several others laugh.

Cary assures, "Don’t listen to them. You’re perfect just the way you are, LeVar."

Zoe adds as she looks at LeVar’s butt and places a hand under her chin, "Well, you could definitely work on your glutes." LeVar raises an eyebrow and looks in her direction.

Evan defends, "Hey, we can’t all have butts like Dirk’s." The others look at him with concerned looks. "What? I cannot be the only one that’s noticed." He looks over at Esme and winks.

Esme looks flustered and states, "Anyway, let’s move on." The two burly interns walk out carrying a large chest.

"Is that the treasure?" Tamira asks, as she pulls down her sunglasses.

Hae Won responds, "If it were, this would be a pretty lame challenge."

Quimberly frowns. "You expect anything other than a lame challenge from this show?"

"Point taken," Hae Won replies with a nod.

Esme explains as she pulls open the chest. "These will be your costumes for the challenge." LeVar claps by himself. "Go ahead and pick out your costumes and meet me back here after you’re dressed."

The contestants are returned and are dressed in their themed costumes.

Quimberly asks, "So we walk around until we find the mcguffin, like the last challenge?"

Esme blushes as she assures, "There is more to it than that. You’ll each be given a sack."

LeVar laughs to himself and repeats, "Sack."

Esme blushes a deeper shade of red. She continues, "Your… bag… will be how you contain the treasure you find. The challenge will last an hour. At the end of that time, the team with the largest amount of treasure in their bags, valued in Canadian dollars, will win invincibility. The value will be determined by our trained expert."

Frederick places a hand, adorned with an impressive looking watch, on his chest and assures, "As there is no one better suited, I will be honored to serve as the expert, and I’m frankly flattered that you…"

"My apologies, but I was speaking about him," Esme informs. Esme gestures to the side.

The camera pans to an old man with a large mustache, who smiles to reveal several gold teeth. Frederick’s eyes widen. "That’s your expert?"

"Heh heh! Darn tootin’," the old man responds before spitting into a bucket.

Skylar’s eyes show his surprise. He asks, "Who ordered the old timey prospector?" He turns to the man and points into the distance. "Tell me. Is there gold in them thar hills?"

Tamira admits in confessional, "Tbh, I will be natch at this challenge. I do have a knack for finding the most luxurious of designer goods…" Tamira then begins to mutter, "And then I subsequently have to settle for a cheap knock off…"

Esme further explains, "There will be fearsome adversaries along the way that will attempt to impede your progress, as well as traps that could also slow you down."

"That’s it?" Quimberly asks.

Esme nods, clasps her hands together, and adds, "Isn’t it romantic?" Quimberly raises a perfectly shaped eyebrow. Esme clears her throat. "If everyone is ready, we can begin the challenge… Now!" The contestants scurry off.

Evan stops near Esme. He assures, "You’re doing great, by the way."

Esme blushes. She replies, "Thanks. You better move along, now." Evan smiles, nods, and hurries after the others.

Frederick, in a prince costume, pokes his head out of the bushes. With him is Luke, dressed as an archer in green. He looks down with a frown. He tugs at his cloak, and looks at his quiver. He says, "LeVar done said I was dressed as a ranger… I wonder which national park I work for…"

Frederick puts a hand up and says, "Silence, peasant."

Luke frowns. He asks, "What are we doing in the bushes? Is it on account of not wanting to scare off the treasure?" The camera zooms in on a ruby sitting in the grass in a clearing.

Frederick grabs hold of Luke’s collar and pulls him closer to himself. "I said quiet."

"Technically you said ‘silence’, but…" Frederick glares intensely at the farmer. Luke looks on with a nervous gaze. Frederick looks down for a moment, and then turns his attention back to the clearing.

Elsewhere, Quimberly, dressed as a warrior princess, walks in front of Zoe who is dressed as a scholar and writing down notes as she walks. Quimberly yawns as she shakes a tree, causing a diamond encrusted goblet, as well as several gold trinkets to fall directly into her bag. She asks, "What are you writing?"

Zoe replies, "I’m taking note of your exercise habits, in order to reach the next level of fitness."

Quimberly frowns. She insists, "I don’t exercise." Zoe covers her ears and drops her writing implements.

Angelo and Dirk walk along together, Dirk dressed as a barbarian, and Angelo in a long white loin covering and sandals. Dirk looks over at Angelo and asks, "So… what are you supposed to be?"

"LeVar said it was some sort of cleric," Angelo explains. He looks down. "I don’t really know what faith I am meant to represent, but at least the costume allows me to continue support for my cause of shirtless awareness."

Dirk nods and adds, "I definitely support the cause."

"Thanks," Angelo responds with a smile. "I…"

Dirk adds with a nod, "Normalize shirtless dudes. That’s what I always say."

Angelo blinks. "No. My cause is…"

Dirk asks, "Hey. I got a question for you."

Angelo smiles and states, "Sure. Go ahead."

Dirk asks, "If you knew something about someone that could mess up their chances in the game, but what they did felt a little sketchy… Would you tell somebody about it?"

Angelo nods and says, "Most definitely."

"Really?" Dirk asks.

"It sounds like the right thing to do," Angelo responds. The two guys stand awkwardly. "So… was there something you wanted to get off your chest?"

Dirk looks down at his bare chest in his barbarian costume. He replies, "No, I don’t think so."

Angelo smiles, again. He states, "Alright, then. We should continue finding some treasure." Angelo kneels down and finds some jewels in the hollow of a tree.

Dirk looks over and sees someone in the distance. He squints his eyes. He looks back at Angelo and remarks, "Hold that thought. I have to go… do something in the bushes."

Angelo raises his eyebrows. He says, "Uh. Don’t feel the need to elaborate. Go ahead." Dirk nods and heads into the bushes with a mischievous look on his face.

Blair is shown walking by herself holding a large map, but looking fairly confused. Someone says, "Psst!" from the bushes.

Blair looks around. She asks, "Who’s there? Is it a wood nymph?"

A masculine voice responds, "Uh. Yes."

Blair nods. She replies, "I’m sure you’re wondering what I’m dressed as, with how confusing it is. LeVar said I was a cartographer, but they didn’t even supply me with a cart."

"Uh huh… That’s nice," the voice states. "Look I don’t want to be seen talking to you."

Blair laughs and says, "If I had a nickel for every time I heard that…"

The voice goes on, "You didn’t hear it from me, but Isabella and Angelo have been seen canoodling in the wilderness."

Blair narrows her eyes and asks, "Were they on that season?"

The voice sighs. It goes on, "The important part is that they were K-I-S-S-I-N-G."

"That is shocking!" Blair narrows her eyes some more and asks, "Was there any tongue action involved?"

"Gross!" the voice responds. "I don’t want to think about that… Okay. I’m outie."

Blair puts a hand to her chin. She says to herself, "That was odd, but it definitely seemed like a reputable source of information." She slams her fist into her open palm. "People need to know this."

Tamira is walking by herself, dressed as a sorceress. She looks down at her skimpy costume and admits, "At least it’s a little black dress." She looks around at her surroundings. She pulls down on a branch and some gems fall down. She looks down. "Ew. Yellow diamonds definitely clash with just about everything." She walks away, leaving the precious gemstones on the ground. She walks into Yuko, with a hat full of eyestalks. Tamira reacts, "Ouch. Why are you even here?"

Yuko answers, "I just got away from Patsy. Anyway, don’t mind me. I’ll be a beholder behind that boulder." Yuko disappears behind the boulder.

Tamira scratches her chin. She turns around and walks into Frederick. Frederick smiles and says, "Pardon me, mademoiselle." He leans over to kiss Tamira’s hand.

Tamira pulls her hand away and responds, "It’s madame."

Frederick smiles and says, "It’s a relief to be in the presence of someone who understands the difference, my dear." Tamira smiles, slightly.

Luke walks up and asserts, “Gee willikers. You two look like you’re cut from the same cloth."

Frederick turns to Tamira and asserts, "Even this bumpkin can tell that you and I are meant to be together…" Tamira glares at Frederick. "For this challenge, I mean," Frederick continues with a smile.

Tamira sighs. She admits, "I mean, if you are here to help me win, I won’t complain. Let’s walk and talk." Frederick and Tamira head off together.

Luke frowns. He says to himself, "I was just talking about the fabric in your outfits being similar… Hey, wait for me!" Luke rushes after Tamira and Frederick.

Dirk pokes his head out from the bushes and causes Evan to let out a scream. Dirk screams in response. Dirk stands up and asks, "Bones? What are you doing standing in front of a bush? You didn’t hear anything, did you?"

Evan explains, as he has his hands at the top of his loin covering, "Nah. Uh. I was about to lower the water level." Dirk raises an eyebrow.

Dirk eyes Evan’s Spartan costume. "It’s a shame that they wasted such an epic costume on the likes of you, Bones. Nobody wants to see that."

Evan frowns. "What is your problem with me? I don’t remember doing anything to you."

Dirk replies, "I don’t owe you an explanation. I’m going to leave, now." Dirk walks off. Evan looks after Dirk with a frown. After Dirk leaves, the frown changes into a smirk.

Quimberly and Zoe walk through the forest together. Zoe asks, "So this challenge is exciting, huh? Much more physically exhilarating than the last one."

Quimberly stops walking for a moment and signals for Zoe to do the same. Two interns dressed as orcs ambush the women, leaving Zoe startled. One of the orcs lunges at Quimberly, who catches his hand and tosses him into the other orc, leaving them unconscious on the ground. Zoe looks at Quimberly in amazement.

Zoe adds, "That was awesome. You’re so good at this challenge."

Quimberly responds, "You call this a challenge? These two were less scary than the kids I coach in the peewee sumo wrestling league."

Zoe looks down at the ground. "I’ve been wondering. Do you even want to be here?" she asks.

Quimberly shrugs her shoulders. "I don’t really know. I considered leaving after the first challenge, but I admit to still not having that special… spark of motivation. Something was telling me to push through, but maybe it was just indigestion."

Zoe says as she does jumping jacks in confessional, "With being eliminated early, it was my dream to get a second shot at this show. I would have literal dreams about how I would play if given another chance, how I would use that chance to motivate the masses. To receive that second chance…" Zoe sighs dreamily as she looks into the distance. The energetic woman focuses back on the camera. "I would hate for Quimberly to waste this chance."

Tamira is reaching into a fake beehive in order to extract some treasure. She excitedly exclaims, "Score!" She squints at the opal in her hand. "Wait. Is this actual…"

Frederick groans. Tamira looks down, as she loses her balance and drops the opal. The camera pans down to reveal that Tamira is standing on Frederick’s back as he is positioned on all fours, with one of her high heels digging into the back of his neck. LeVar and Jerome rush by as LeVar swoops down and grabs hold of the opal before running off.

Luke helps Tamira down. Frederick stands and pushes Luke aside. Frederick asks, "Are you alright, my dear?"

Luke assures, "Yessir. I admit you shoved me a little hard, but I’ve got a midsection like a tree trunk." Luke knocks on his stomach with his fist. Frederick ignores him as all of his attention is focused on Tamira. Luke looks on and scratches the back of his head.

Tamira assures, "Me? I’m fine. But what about you?" Tamira looks over at Frederick with concern. "You’re bleeding!"

Patsy walks onto the scene. Tamira turns to Luke and Patsy. "Go get help." Luke nods and he and Patsy run off into the forest.

Frederick puts a hand on his neck and looks down at his hand. He assures, "It’s fine, really. I…" Frederick looks squeamish. "I…" Frederick slowly slouches down to the ground and passes out.

LeVar and Jerome are shown high fiving, Jerome dressed as a bard with a mandolin strapped to his back, LeVar dressed as a dark elf. "You saw my moves out there?"

Jerome laughs and assures, "You looked great, boo." Jerome puts a hand on his stomach and admits, "I’m feeling like a kid, again." He admits, "Last time I was on this show, I was more concerned about my appearance. I wasn’t able to have fun like this."

LeVar assures, "Hey. Guys like us can’t help our prettiness." LeVar points toward a giant flower. "That looks like a prop. I’m sure there’s some treasure in there." He walks toward the flower.

Jerome calls, "Hey, remember when Esme said the thing about traps. We probably shouldn’t be just hopping into things all will nilly."

LeVar stops. He admits, "Yeah. I think you’re right." He looks over at Jerome. "You know? You’re pretty cool, pops."

Jerome’s eyes are wide. He replies, "I am only… a handful of years older than you."

LeVar responds with a laugh, "That makes you older than my current stepdad, but he’s nowhere as cool as you." LeVar smirks. "Hey, you’d make an awesome stepdad. I can have you on speed dial for when he and my ma inevitably split up."

Jerome’s eyes are wide. Jerome then lowers his eye lids and rubs the sides of his eyes. He says, "Don’t say stuff like that. It’s bad for my crow’s feet."

LeVar laughs, as he puts a small statuette into his bag. He holds up his bag and admits, "Man. With all the treasure we’ve been finding, my bag is not feeling much heavier." Jerome puts a well manicured hand over his face. "What is it?" LeVar looks at his bag, and his jaw drops. Jerome lifts up his bag. The guys stare at the holes at the bottom of their bags. "Can you believe this? This show can’t even afford bags that don’t bust."

Jerome holds the bottom of the bag with his other hand in order to get a closer look. He observes, "I don’t know about you, boo, but my bag was sliced."

LeVar growls, "What?! What jerk would do that?"

Jerome shrugs and assures, "We can’t worry about that now. Luckily, I always keep a sewing kit on me." He looks at LeVar. "Do you mind turning around?" LeVar blinks, but turns around and covers his eyes for good measure. "Okay, you can look again, boo." LeVar turns around and sees Jerome already sewing his bag. LeVar looks on with an amazed stare.

In confessional, LeVar admits, "I can’t believe how well Jerome and I get along. He seemed so… prissy. I must admit that I do admire how confident he is in himself." LeVar looks thoughtful as he places a hand under his chin. "I wonder if he does cosplay commissions."

Frederick stands to his feet. He dusts himself off and looks at the makeshift bandage on his neck fashioned from Tamira’s bag. He admits, "How embarrassing…"

Tamira assures, "Don’t be embarrassed. You’re hurt. Are you sure you should be standing?"

Frederick assures. "I’m fine, really."

In confessional, Frederick frowns. "I don’t want to make injury my storyline on this season." He rolls his eyes. "It would be a step up from my last season, though."

Frederick directs Tamira, "Let’s hurry and find some treasure for your team. There’s not much time left." He hands Tamira his bag for the challenge.

"What about your team?" Tamira asks. Frederick looks down for a moment and then forces a smile when he looks back up at her. "Listen, Frederick. I think you’re very sweet, but there will never be anything between us."

Frederick points toward a large prop flower. "Aha! There surely must be something inside there." Frederick rushes over to the flower.

"Frederick, wait!" Tamira calls out as she runs behind him.

Frederick places his hand inside the center of the flower. He looks back and assures, "It’s fine. There was something in here." Frederick turns back around and his face drops. He attempts to pull his hand back. He looks back and forces a smile. "I appear to be stuck. If you could grab my other hand and pull."

Tamira sighs and stands behind him. She takes hold of his hand and begins to pull. "Is this helping?"

Frederick explains, "I believe this beautiful flower got caught on my incredibly expensive watch."

Tamira rolls her eyes. "You don’t have to continuously mention your wealth. Like I said. I am not interested."

Frederick insists, "This isn’t some sort of indecent proposal. I respect you for your devotion to your husband. I’ve had a challenging year, so… I just…" Frederick’s hand comes loose. He launches forward, knocks Tamira down, and lands on top of her.

Yuko walks forward and says, "I’m not getting involved, but I find it necessary to say that help is…" Her eyes get wide as she witnesses the scene.

Frederick assures, "This is not what it appears to be." He looks down and sees that Tamira is unconscious. He quickly stands up, and puts a hand over his chest. "Somebody please help her." A few members of the medical staff rush over and kneel down next to Tamira.

Tamira wakes up and sees the staff surrounding her. She holds herself up with her arms and asks, "What happened?" She looks on as Frederick is led away from the area by interns. "What’s going on?" The medical staff approaches her. She assures, "I’m fine, really." One of the medics helps Tamira to her feet. The medical staff makes sure that Tamira is alright before leaving the area. Tamira turns to Yuko. "Why isn’t anyone telling me anything?”

Yuko admits, as she looks down, "It didn’t… look good."

Tamira blinks. She assures, "I’m going to need more explanation than…"

"Hey, guys." The women look over to see Cary emerging from the bushes, as he pulls branches back. He looks around and asks, "What happened here?"

Tamira insists, "We should keep moving." She smiles. "This challenge isn’t over, yet." Yuko shrugs and turns around. Tamira follows after her. She pauses to look back for a moment before continuing forward.

Cary begins walking. He pauses and looks over by the massive flower. He stoops down. "Why would Frederick leave this behind?"

Tamira calls out, "We’re going!" Cary nods. He quickly slips two items into his bag before following.

LeVar and Jerome are shown walking. LeVar’s ears perk up. Some gasps and commotion are audible from beyond some trees. A muffled roaring noise also can be heard. LeVar points behind him. "There’s something going on over here. We should check it out."

Jerome looks in the opposite direction. He assures, "There’s some treasure over behind this rock, I’ll join you in a hot minute." LeVar nods and walks through the trees. He notices a group of contestants, made up of Evan, Skylar, Brent, Ruth, and Hae Won standing motionless. He looks at Evan’s Spartan costume and comments, "They’re running pretty loose with the whole time period on this challenge, huh?" Evan remains motionless as he stares forward. "What are you all gawking at?" LeVar follows the direction of their eyes. His mouth drops down when he sees what they’re staring at. He lets out, "Oh… my… gaaaaaaah…"

Isabella and Angelo are walking with each other. Isabella, dressed in red armor, signs. The captions read, "I wish there was someone on my team I could communicate with more easily. It’s made it a challenge to fit in."

Angelo assures as he signs. The captions read, "You’re great, smart, and sweet. They’ll love you when they get to know you." Isabella observes some rustling leaves. Angelo looks up for a moment. He points up with a smile. Isabella looks up and sees a helicopter speed by above the trees.

"Wow," Isabella signs. "What are they doing way out here?" She looks back down at Angelo.

Angelo is knelt down. He holds out a gold encrusted rose, which Isabella takes from him with a smile. Angelo signs, "I found this earlier. It reminded me of you."

Isabella signs, "What if your team found out you were helping me?"

Angelo smiles. He signs, "Some things mean more than the game." Isabella smiles.

In confessional, Isabella signs with a sigh, "I wanted to avoid being boy crazy this season, and just focus on the game, but… I wasn’t expecting to find the perfect guy."

Isabella leans in to kiss Angelo. He leans in. He stops and looks back. He signs, "There’s something going on over here. Let’s go check it out." Isabella nods.

Angelo and Isabella emerge from the trees and witness Evan, Skylar, LeVar, Brent, Ruth, and Hae Won in awe of a massive red dragon guarding a treasure chest. Angelo and Isabella also stand in amazement. Evan mutters, "The production value."

"The artistry," Ruth adds.

LeVar comments, his eyes sparkling, "The attention to detail."

"It moves, too," Skylar adds with a nod.

Angelo admits, "It is impressive, but is anyone going to attempt to grab any of the gold over there?"

An alarm sounds, and then Zane is heard over the loudspeakers, "The challenge is over. Please bring your accumulated treasure to the challenge starting point. I repeat… The challenge is over…" After a few moments of silence, Zane continues. "Jeez. Relegated to announcement duty. What’s next? Waxing Chris’ toe knuckles? I mean… have you seen that guy’s feet? I swear he’s part chimp…" Most of the contestants look up with wide eyes. "I… I’m still on, aren’t I…" After a nervous laugh, Zane continues, "And that concludes my dramatic reading of Intern Marco’s diary. It was nice knowing you, Marco. Remind me to give you back your MP3 player." Zane pauses, again. "Oh, and ta big thank you goes out to our special guest for their contribution of the incredible dragon for the challenge. You’ll all recognize our guest from an early season of our show. Everybody give a round of applause to…" The announcement ends short.

Hae Won rolls her eyes and notes, "I thought that announcement was never going to end."

"Wait, so who’s the genius behind the masterpiece?" Ruth asks as she looks around.

"You’re telling me this thing isn’t a real dragon?" LeVar asks with a scoff. He covers his ears. "I don’t want to hear it." LeVar lowers his arms, as a loud screeching sound comes from the dragon.

The large mouth of the dragon opens slowly with steam pouring from within it. The gathered contestants squint their eyes as a figure becomes less obscured by the dissipating steam. "Who is that?" Evan asks, as he leans forward.

A gangly, tan young man with purple hair is sitting at a control panel with a wide, goofy grin. Brent begins, "Hey, it’s…"

"’Tis I!" the voice announces. "The dawn of my grand reveal hath… dawned! I am but a humble servant to the grand scheme of…"

"Just say your name, already," Hae Won demands with her arms folded.

"The name is Herman!" Herman reveals. The present contestants applaud at the impressive mechanism. Herman looks down. He admits, "I was in a rush to finish this project." He pats the side of the mechanical dragon.

"You built this?!" LeVar exclaims, with his mouth wide open.

Herman blushes a little. He responds, "This is one of my less polished pieces, I admit. Please don’t judge it too harshly." LeVar and Ruth look on in disbelief. "I didn’t exactly have time to make a proper means to evacuate this winged creation. If I could get some assistance…" The mechanism jerks unexpectedly. Herman’s eyes widen as he launches from the mouth of the great dragon. The others gasp.

Quimberly and Zoe arrive. Quimberly asks, "Where have you all been? We were waiting for you…" Quimberly gestures with her arms out, as Herman falls right into them.

Herman sighs in relief. He states, "Thank you, my dear maiden. It appears that you have come to my rescue." Quimberly’s eyes are wide as she stares at Herman. Herman awkwardly requests, "If you could return me to my feet." Quimberly nods before setting him down. Herman continues, "You should all go gather at the starting point." The others nod, and head in that direction, LeVar and Ruth both admire the red dragon as they pass it.

Brent and Angelo walk near Herman. Brent states, "It’s nice to see you, again, but… Why are you in your skivvies?"

Herman blushes. He points behind him with his thumb and responds, "Kinda hot in these dragons." Brent blinks and then nods.

The contestants are gathered at the starting point. Chris is also present. The old timey prospector is counting the treasure as the others watch. Cary looks around. He raises a hand. Chris looks over at him, "Yes, Grant."

Cary responds, "It’s Cary, actually. I am not worthy of being called…"

"Your question?" Chris asks, tapping his foot impatiently.

Cary replies, "Yes… What happened to Frederick? He was here earlier."

"Oh, that," Chris replies. "We learned of something that happened that was most unfortunate. Here at Total Drama, we take very seriously any cause for emotional… pain. We’re nothing if not completely sensitive."

"Since when?" Skylar asks with a raised eyebrow.

Chris continues, "Frederick has been disqualified from the competition, and was immediately evacuated via helicopter." A few contestants gasp. Chris looks over at Esme who looks down at the ground.

Cary’s eyes are wide. He responds with, "What?!"

Tamira looks confused. She asks Yuko, "Do you know what Chris is talking about?" Yuko averts her gaze and does not respond. Cary looks at Tamira who responds with a shrug.

Chris states, "Let’s check in with the challenge’s judge."

The judge responds, "I reckon that I’m almost done countin’. The ladies have a considerable lead, thanks mostly to that Quimberly lass."

"It’s not a big deal," Quimberly assures.

The prospector continues, "With one bag left to count, the fellas look to be at a right disadvantage, but don’t count your treasure before it’s evaluated. Heh heh!"

"That phrase will never catch on," Hae Won assures.

Blair nudges Hae Won with her elbow. "There’s only two pieces of treasure in that bag."

Cary looks on. He admits, "Uh, Chris? That’s actually my bag. It’s not…"

"Woooo-eeee!" The judge interjects. He pulls out a jeweler’s eyeglass to further inspect the items. "This here crown is worth a bit, but this timepiece…" The prospector slaps his cheek. "A genuine Schmolex!"

Cary comments to himself, "That was Frederick’s…"

"This takes the fellas over the top," the judge explains. "They done won the challenge!" The guys cheer.

LeVar folds his arms, "Even so, we lost a team member. Even if The Black Swans vote someone out, that still isn’t fair."

Chris rubs his chin. "I see your point."

Quimberly clears her throat. She announces, "I have an announcement to make. I do not feel that I have the proper motivation to continue in this comp…"

"Hold that thought," Chris commands with a flick of his wrist. "Somebody bring Herman back out here." An intern nods before leaving.

Herman returns, now in a royal blue jacket, and black trousers. He says, "You wanted to see me Master McLean?"

Chris smirks and asks, "Hey, Herman. Since you happen to be here, and we have no better prospects… How would you like to compete on Total Drama: Worst of the Worst? I would certainly say you qualify." Quimberly’s eyes get wide.

"Thank ye for the offer, sire, but…" Herman begins, "I must check ye olde schedule." Herman sticks out his tongue as he removes a scroll from his pocket and looks it over. "It appears that I am narrowly available."

Anders, standing behind Herman, asks, "What’s that blank piece of paper?" Herman clears his throat and returns the scroll to his pocket.

"With that, The Black Swans must vote out another team member," Chris announces. He pauses for a moment. "Oh, right. Quimberly. You were saying something?"

Quimberly looks at Herman as his team members welcome him with high fives and back slaps. She awkwardly responds, "N-nope, nope. I seem to have lost my thought." Grace looks in her direction with a raised eyebrow.

"Hey, mister!" The old prospector calls out. "Can I keep this watch?"

Chris shrugs and says, "Sure."

"Gee!" the challenge judge responds with a hand on his head. "Thanks, mister!" The prospector scurries off.

Chris nods. "I will see you all later tonight." He walks away, as The Black Swans move toward their cabin with mostly disappointed looks. Isabella and Quimberly walk ahead of the others.

Esme calls out as she follows after him, "Mr. McLean! What should we do with all the treasure, and that dragon?"

Chris responds, "Find somewhere to dump it. There’s an abandoned mine somewhere around here."

Skylar asks, "Hey, LeVar. A few of us guys were wondering what we were dressed as."

LeVar answers, as he looks up and down at Skylar’s puffy shirt and tight pants. "You’re some kind of seafaring prince. The kind that gets turned on by mermaids and stuff."

Skylar shrugs and replies, "I’m down with that."

Brent asks, "What about me?"

Herman and LeVar look at each other blankly. LeVar responds, "Nobody knows. We think it’s a bunch of leftover scraps all put together." LeVar puts his arm around Herman and states, "Dude, you’re the coolest. You have got to show me how to build like you." The guys walk off.

Blair thinks for a moment, and then she randomly states, "Oh, right! I had something unsettling to tell all of you."

"Can we at least have a moment of silence for losing the challenge?" Grace asks as she rubs her temples.

Zoe puts an arm around Blair and assures, "Go ahead, Blair. Don’t listen to the grouchy pants." Grace glares in Zoe’s direction.

Blair nods and smiles. Her eyes dart back and forth as she announces, "Earlier, I stumbled across… a talking bush!"

Grace blinks. She points at Zoe and remarks, "I blame you for enabling her."

At the campfire ceremony, Chris holds up the tray of marshmallows. He announces, "I would explain the whole marshmallow meaning life thing, but you all are old pros at this, so let’s move on." Chris holds up the first marshmallow. "This one goes to Ruth." Ruth smiles before she catches her marshmallow. "The next one belongs to… Hae Won." Hae Won breathes a sigh of relief before catching her marshmallow. "The next ones go to Patsy, Yuko, Zoe, Grace, Blair, and… Tamira!" The contestants retrieve their marshmallows. "That leaves Isabella, Quimberly, and one marshmallow." Chris holds up said marshmallow. "It goes to…"

"Quimberly," Chris announces, before tossing over the marshmallow.

Isabella frowns. She asks and signs, "You found out about Angelo, didn’t you?"

"Angelo?" Ruth asks. "What about him?"

Blair asks, "You mean how you and he were all hot and heavy?"

Isabella signs and says, "I wouldn’t have put it quite like that."

Blair assures, "Nah. It had nothing to do with that."

Hae Won explains, "Although that does explain where you kept disappearing off to. It would have been nice to get to know you better, admittedly," she admits. "We really couldn’t decide who to eliminate, so we went with who we knew the least."

On The Boat of Losers, Isabella signs and explains, "I suppose I could have tried harder to fit in, but it was more challenging this time around with everyone having preexisting relationships… And I admit that Angelo was just… so distracting. I hope we can reunite after the show."

Chris stands on the dock. He recaps, "Frederick and Isabella have been eliminated, and Herman is now a part of the competition. How will this shake up the competition? Tune in next time to find out."

Cary is shown sitting outside his cabin on the steps. Skylar sits down next to him. He asks, "What’s going on, bro? You seem a little off."

Cary admits, "I guess that’s the right way to describe it. Frederick’s elimination just felt… odd to me. After the conversation I had with him, it just didn’t seem to add up, unless…"

"What is it?" Skylar asks.

"He had some personal issues he has been dealing with," Cary explains. "Don’t worry. He’s okay, but… he promised me not to tell anyone what was going on, and he even had production turn the cameras off when he spoke about it." Cary looks to the side. "I’m just worried. I wish I could have spoken to him before he left. Plus, the way his departure was described… I’m afraid it might be misconstrued."

Skylar assures, "You’re a good friend, Cary. He’ll be alright. I’m sure you’ll get your chance to talk."

Cary nods, and then smiles. "I know you’re right."

Skylar pats Cary on the shoulder and says, "Let’s get some sleep." Cary nods before the two stand up and head indoors.

### Chapter 4 - Tank U, Next

"Welcome to an all new episode of Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst!" Chris McLean announces with his signature whitened smile. "On the shocking previous episode, we had a totally unscripted double elimination. After some… unfortunate circumstances… Frederick was disqualified from the competition. We invited the unforgettable…" Chris puts on his reading glasses and looks down to read off of an index card. "Herman… back into the competition." Chris puts away his glasses. "The Black Swans lost the treasure finding challenge, and decided to vote out Isabella because she was spending all her time lip smacking with Angelo, instead of bonding with her team. On tonight’s episode, who will win the challenge? And who will be sent packing? Find out after the filler!"

Walking out of the elimination ceremony, Hae Won states, "We have to stop losing challenges."

Grace frowns. She responds, "Maybe you should have suggested that strategy sooner." Hae Won glares at Grace.

Tamira looks down at the ground. Yuko sighs, as she looks a side. "I’m not one to get involved, but…" She asks, "How are you holding up?"

Tamira assures, "I’m perfectly fine. Why shouldn’t I be?"

Yuko assures, "Uh. No reason." She darts her eyes back and forth. "Forget I was even here. In fact, forget who I am." Yuko disappears into the night.

Tamira is shown in confessional clutching her pearls. She asks the camera, "Omg. Who even was that?"

As the women exit the campfire ceremony site, Blair notes, "Who invited the beefcake?"

Angelo waves as The Black Swans emerge from the venue. Angelo assures, "I think the term ‘beef’ might be considered as offensive for some people’s views on meat consumption."

Hae Won shrugs and replies, “Who invited the public service announcement on veganism?"

Angelo smiles and assures, "I am vegan, actually. I’m sure it will become more common some day. Anyway, I was just out for a late night stroll and thought I’d see how everyone was doing. I mean… I’ve only ever been at one elimination ceremony, and even then I accepted it with a maturity beyond my years… But I’m sure it can be emotional for…" Angelo’s smile fades into a marginally less wide smile.

Grace shields her eyes requests, "Could you put away your teeth? I didn’t bring my sunglasses."

"My apologies. So… uh…" Angelo replies, as he lowers his upper lip. "It was Isabella, huh?"

Hae Won smirks. "We know you two were… How do I put it gently? Swapping spit."

Blair insists, "That wasn’t the reason for our decision, we assure you. It was because we didn’t get to know her all that well, because she was so busy spending all her time with…"

Zoe interrupts and insists, "We know she’s a super person. I was on her season, you know."

Angelo nods and assures, "Oh. There’s definitely no hard feelings on my part."

"Just your abs," Zoe responds. "You’ll need to give me your workout regimen."

Grace suggests, "It’s probably from rescuing puppies with no limbs, or something."

"Anyway…" Angelo responds, as his gaze shifts over. "Have a lovely night, ladies." Angelo walks past The Black Swans. Patsy has an arm around Yuko, as Yuko looks annoyed. As he walks near the pair, Angelo briefly glances in their direction before walking past them.

Hae Won turns to Grace and says, "That was really odd." Grace nods.

Herman is shown in confessional. He admits, "‘Twas but a fortnight whence I agreed to a guest appearance on this program. I never expected the invitation to compete. In fact… I hath given up any hope at redeeming my previous bequest." Herman looks down. He looks back up and admits, "I would be but a fool to pass up the opportunity. That ‘twas why I agreed with a hearty ‘yay verily’ to appear." Herman swings a fist to the side with a smile. "Plus, I got an opportunity to show off one of my bestiary. Bonus!" Herman rubs the back of his head. "I doth admit that it didn’t look half bad."

An intern helps Herman carry his belongings to his new home on the island, as Brent and Cary are there to welcome him. Brent assures, in a monotone, "We’re so excited to have you join us." Herman looks at Cary and then they both simultaneously avoid eye contact.

Cary puts a hand on the back of his neck. He admits, "I know we didn’t leave on the best of terms…"

Herman smiles and assures, "It’s all water under the barge, sire." Cary smiles, slightly. Herman lets out a sigh. "I’m just relieved that your scalawag of a brother is not a competitor this season. That Cary really boileth my grog." Herman grits his teeth as Cary frowns. Herman stomps his way into the shared cabin.

Cary looks at Brent. Brent shrugs his shoulders and admits, "It could be a different Cary."

Cary slams a fist into his open palm and declares, "I vow to make it up to him."

"Give it time. He’ll see you’re a changed man," Brent insists.

Cary assures, "Thanks, Brent."

"I mean, I’m sure I’ll see it at some point, too," Brent adds with a nod.

"Thanks, I…" Cary pauses, as he blinks. "Wait…" Brent ducks into the cabin. Cary winces as he admits, "I guess I deserve that." He follows after him.

Inside the cabin, Skylar raises a root beer. "Cheers to our newest recruit. Let’s make The Her-Man feel welcome!" Skylar has his free arm around Herman’s shoulder as Herman blushes a little. Most of the other members of The Raging Bulls cheer. "Make yourself at home."

Herman places a hand under his chin and considers, "That would mean the addition of a moat at some point."

LeVar pushes Skylar off of Herman, causing Skylar to fall to the ground. Herman looks down and asks, "Art thou alright?"

LeVar assures, "Don’t worry about Pitfall. He did this to himself."

Skylar stands up, dusts himself off, and insists, "My name’s not…"

"I thought I was an expert at alternative fiction until I met you," LeVar assures Herman. "While I do prefer sci-fi…" He waves across the air with his free hand. "I want you to teach me the way of the nerd." Herman blinks as he looks at LeVar.

Skylar adds, "Before all that, I had an extra root beer for my man, Hermès." Skylar reaches a hand into the pocket of his nightshirt.

LeVar looks at Skylar’s sleepwear. He comments, "Nice dress, Pitfall." Skylar blinks and looks down.

"It’s a nightshirt," Skylar responds defensively. "Besides. If it was a dress, who are you to judge me? Internationally acclaimed male model and reality show judge, Myron Tanks?"

"He’s my favorite," Dirk assures. "I had his swimsuit edition poster hanging in my dorm room." LeVar raises an eyebrow. "Dude had a physique I could only dream of." LeVar lowers his eyebrow. Dirk places a finger under his chin. "That is, until that cheeseburger endorsement."

LeVar looks at Dirk. "Anyway…" LeVar raises his hands and insists, "Don’t be so defensive, Pitfall."

Skylar lets out a sigh and says, as he holds up the root beer, "So how about it, Herman?"

Herman puts a hand up and assures, "Maybe later, Pitfall."

Skylar responds quietly, "Et tu, Herman?"

"Yoink!" LeVar interjects as he takes both bottles of root beer from Skylar and hands one to Herman. The two guys laugh as Skylar looks on with wide eyes.

LeVar and Herman high five, causing Herman to almost lose his balance. LeVar laughs as he holds him up. He states, "You’re so crazy."

Jerome assures, "Herman is definitely an upgrade from that Frederick scum ball."

"I don’t think so," Dirk responds, laying on his bunk, as he tosses a baseball into the air and catches it. "The last thing we need is another skinny guy. Cough, Evan, cough!" Evan looks over and offers a blurry hand gesture.

Jerome folds his arms, as he sits on his bunk. "He barely tried in the challenges. It’s like he wanted the ladies to win, which I assumed you of all people would disapprove of."

Dirk admits, "At least he had some muscle on him. Reminded me of my high society frat bros, Snapple, Crackle, and Popple." Jerome raises an eyebrow. "Dudes could knock me out with a sleeper hold in a matter of seconds." Dirk laughs to himself. "This one time I blacked out so hard, and then I woke up in the dean’s shower in a Little Bo Peep costume. Got suspended for three months…" Dirk smiles before wiping a sentimental tear from his eye.  "Man, I miss those guys." Jerome looks at Dirk with a disconcerted expression.

Skylar states in confessional, "After last night, I realized that I’m kind of in a vulnerable position. I mean… My team is great and all, but I began thinking it might be in my best interest to fish around for an alliance. I mean, what other choice do I have? I don’t want the current team dynamics to lead to my… downfall." Skylar frowns. He looks to the side. "Anyway…"

Skylar is shown walking outside of the cabins, whistling. He looks around and spots Dirk on the beach lying on a towel in a tiny pair of jean shorts. Skylar walks down and greets, "Hey, Bruh. Looking good."

Dirk lowers his sunglasses as he looks at Skylar. He puts his glasses back on, and lays back down. "You’re not my type."

Skylar raises his eyebrows. He responds, "Uh. No, dude. I wasn’t hitting on you."

"You weren’t?" Dirk asks.

"Nah," Skylar assures. "Not that you aren’t a ruggedly handsome male specimen with a glorious mullet."

"That’s not hitting on me?" Dirk asks with a raised eyebrow.

"No, I mean…" Skylar begins. He sighs. "Look. I was wanting to start an alliance. How does that sound?"

Dirk places a hand under his chin. "You know? That’s not a bad idea, at all, Pitfall."

Skylar breathes a sigh of relief. "Awesome… And don’t call me that. I’m going to go and round up some more allies." Skylar rushes off and clicks his heels together as he departs.

Dirk continues, "I’m going to start an alliance. Of course, I’m naturally not interested in joining one with you, but thanks for the idea…" Dirk stands up, brushes some sand off of his legs, and looks around. "Where did he go?" Dirk shrugs. "No skin off of my butt, or however the saying goes." Dirk walks off, dragging his beach towel behind him.

Anders and Angelo are standing together. Anders explains, "So after I resuscitated prime minister, he offered his daughter’s hand. Maybe I am still unaware of customs of your country, but that seemed most barbaric to sever one’s own child’s hand and give it to practical stranger." Anders blinks as he realizes that Angelo seems despondent. "Anders wonders what is matter, ja? You are usually bright like sunshine glistening off snow capped mountains."

Angelo asks, "Huh? Oh, it’s nothing. My head is elsewhere."

Anders places his hands on either side of Angelo’s face. He asks, "I think maybe you are mistaken. Head is right here, ja?"

Angelo laughs. Anders puts his hands down. "I’ll be frank…"

Anders nods. "Fine. You be frank. Is it okay if Anders stays Anders?"

Angelo laughs, again. "You’re really very funny. If it is easier for you, I do speak Swedish, as well as 23 other languages common in Europe."

Anders shakes his head and assures, "It is good for Anders to work on English." Angelo nods.

Angelo goes on, "It’s just that… Something happened that made me kind of… mad. I’m not used to feeling that way. Things happen in life, and I’m always the level headed one." Anders looks confused. Angelo clarifies, "I handle things calmly, I mean. It’s making me… dislike certain people. I have never felt like this, before."

Anders scratches his head. He extends a finger as he seems to have an idea. "Ja. It sounds like a tense situation, ja?" Angelo nods. "You feel stressed and not calm?" Angelo nods. "Anders knows what you need."

Skylar walks up as Anders is rubbing Angelo’s shoulders, as Angelo looks incredibly relaxed. Skylar’s eyes widen. He asks, "Do I get a turn?"

Angelo explains, "I was telling Anders I was tense, and he insisted on this massage. It did seem to help…" Angelo rubs his own shoulder for a few moments.

Skylar assures, "Speaking of which, there’s a couple of guys that were sort of… rubbing me the wrong way.”

Anders hands Skylar a piece of paper. "Here is Anders’ card."

Skylar looks at it for a moment. He changes the subject after tucking the business card in his jacket pocket. "Anyway… I was offering an alliance to some of the guys. What do you say?"

"Sure, man," Angelo answers. "That sounds great." Anders also nods, blankly.

"Sweet!" Skylar states. He walks off and pauses as he punches at the air.

In confessional, Skylar states, "This is going way easier than I expected!"

After Skylar is gone, Anders asks, "What is ‘alliance’?"

Angelo bends over and holds up an empty bottle of root beer. Angelo explains, "It’s the brand of root beer he seems to like. See?" The label reads ‘Alliance’.

"Oh!" Anders responds.

Dirk walks up and greets, "Hey, Angelo. Hey, Anders."

Anders points a thumb at Angelo and explains, "Angelo is now named ‘Frank’." Dirk looks confused.

Angelo laughs and says, "Never mind him. What’s up?"

Dirk casually suggests, "I thought it would only be natural for the hot guys on The Raging Bulls to team up and vote together. What do you say?"

Anders responds, "Anders says ‘why do you care what LeVar, Angelo, and Luke do with voting?’"

Dirk laughs. He says, as he points to Anders and looks at Angelo, "Can you believe this guy?" Dirk goes on as he looks back at Anders, "I meant the three of us. You, me, and Angelo."

Angelo responds, "I can’t really imagine voting the other guys out, but I suppose it is perfectly acceptable in the context of the game." Dirk blinks. "I’m in."

Anders nods and states, "I also do not want an early vote out. I am Anders, and Anders is in."

Dirk pumps his fist. He states, "Awesome." He gestures as he shifts his hands through the air. "Our group name will be ‘The Beady Eye Brigade’."

Angelo blinks. He says, "I don’t know how I feel about that name."

Dirk replies, "Look. I put about thirty seconds of thought into that name. We’re keeping it."

Angelo smiles and assures, "I’m not one to make waves. We can keep the name."

Dirk smiles as he puts one arm around Angelo’s shoulders, and the other around Anders’ waist. "We are going to make beautiful music together," Dirk comments with a smirk.

Anders asks, "Ja? What instruments do you guys play?"

Angelo counts on his hand, "The harpsichord, the oboe, the viola, the clarinet, the dulcimer, the glockenspiel…"

Dirk rolls his eyes and says, "Come on, dude. No one likes a Quimberly."

Anders is shown in confessional. He blinks blankly. "I thought everyone liked a Quimberly, ja?"

Cary is leaning in front of a window with a frown. He rubs something under his eyes. Tamira opens up the window from the inside, wearing a bathrobe. Cary looks shocked. Tamira looks around and calls out, "Security! We have a pervert!"

Cary’s face turns red, "No. It’s nothing like that. I was applying eye cream to reduce my dark circles." Cary holds up a jar of eye cream. "See? This was just the closest reflective service I could find."

Tamira shrugs. She admits, "Your alibi checks out." Cary smiles. "Your dark circles are pretty bad." Cary frowns. Tamira holds up an index finger and recommends, "To avoid expensive eye creams, the caffeine in tea bags helps to reduce dark circles at a fraction of the cost."

"Really?" Cary replies with wide eyes.

Tamira suggests, "And avoid stretching your eyes like that." Cary squints. "Are we done here?" Tamira begins to close her window.

"Wait!" Cary puts his hand down as Tamira slams the window down on it. Cary yelps from the pane.

Tamira is seen standing outside while wrapping Cary’s hand in cloth. She frowns. "You should really avoid putting your hand under closing windows."

"Sorry," Cary responds. "I just had something to ask you."

Tamira asks, "And what’s that?"

Cary puts his uninjured hand on the back of his head. He admits, "I was wondering about Frederick."

"What about him?" Tamira asks as she looks to the side.

Cary asks, "You were with him right before he was evacuated, weren’t you? I was curious about what happened with him."

Tamira frowns she responds. "I don’t know anything." Tamira finishes dressing Cary’s wound. "I think we’re done here." Tamira walks back toward her cabin. She pauses and releases a small sigh. She turns back. "I would try talking to… Yuko, I think it is? She seems to know something that I don’t."

Cary nods and thanks, "Thank you for the info. I’ll be sure to talk to her." He also holds up his wrapped hand. "And thanks for the bandage."

Tamira frowns. "Don’t mention it." Cary shrugs and nods.

Grace walks by herself in a clearing with some flowers on the ground. She looks around before crouching down and picking some flowers. A masked figure in the background holds up a running chainsaw over their head. Yuko rushes out from behind a tree and calls out, "Look out behind you!"

Grace drops her flowers as she turns around. She looks back at Yuko and asks, "What is it?"

Yuko points at the masked person, and exclaims, "There’s a chainsaw killer!"

Ruth lifts up her mask, after she turns off her chainsaw and sets it down. She explains, "I was just working on some wood carvings. See?" She points to several carvings of what appears to be average looking men with long bangs.

Grace frowns. "You think I’m too dense to notice a chainsaw whirring in the background?"

Yuko puts a hand over her chest. She admits, "I apologize. I don’t know what came over me. I just saw the chainsaw when I was hiding back there and panicked. I’ll be going…"

"Were you spying on us?" Grace asks with a raised eyebrow.

"Just casually observing," Yuko insists. "Don’t mind me." Yuko walks off.

Grace looks over at Ruth and her carvings. She places a hand on her hip. "How come when I pose for you, your work still looks like that Average Joe?"

Ruth shrugs. She admits, "I suppose he does bare some resemblance to a stump." Grace nods.

Yuko is seen as she leans back against a tree. She lets out a sigh. She says to herself, "I am losing my edge out here."

"Buck up, tiger," Cary encouragingly states, as he appears from nowhere. Yuko screams. Cary rubs under his eyes. "Are my dark circles really that bad?"

Yuko looks aside. "At least you’re not that Patsy person… Just… Act like I’m not here."

Cary rubs the back of his head. He holds up his injured hand. "You’re probably wondering how this happened."

"I didn’t hear the full conversation, but it happened when Tamira slammed a window down on your hand," Yuko explains.

Cary blinks. "How did you…"

"I’m the best at what I do," Yuko insists with a smirk. She says quietly and looks aside, "At least… most of the time." Yuko looks at Cary and says, "Well, I have places to be and people to see, without them seeing me." Yuko begins walking away.

Cary interjects, "Hey, wait. I had something to ask you about something you might have witnessed."

Yuko shakes her head. "I’m an objective observer. I don’t report what I see."

Cary looks down. He admits, "Look. I know I’m not in a position to tell you what to do… But in this case, somebody’s reputation is on the line. I’m not trying to pressure you, or whatever, but everyone is being really weird about what happened with Frederick, and I want to get down to the bottom of it. If something serious happened, and you saw it, then it’s your duty to tell someone, even if it isn’t me."

Yuko pauses for a moment. She seems to be looking beyond Cary. She says quietly, "That would be breaking my code, but…" She looks at a wide eyed Cary. "I’ll… I’ll think about what you said."

Cary breathes a sigh of relief, as he looks down. "That’s all I ask. Thank…" He looks back up to see that Yuko is no longer present.

Esme is shown holding her clipboard tight. She calls out, "Gather ‘round, everyone!" The competitors approach her as they look at the course for the challenge, which appears to be two obstacle courses, each in the respective team’s colors, purple and black. Quimberly looks over at Herman, who is laughing with LeVar’s arm around his shoulder. LeVar looks over at Quimberly, who quickly averts her gaze. LeVar smirks as he turns his attention back to Esme.

A particularly sweaty Zane pulls a large crate to the starting point of The Black Swans course. He is standing next to Dirk, and smiles. He says to him, "I thought you’d be out first." Zane lifts his shirt to use it to wipe his face.

Dirk looks at Zane’s stomach with a furrowed bro. He retorts with a smirk, "Sorry. I mistook you for a hat rack, but I see you’re just Chris’ doormat." Dirk jabs the thin assistant host with his elbow.

Zane’s eyes express his pain on impact. He coughs as he pulls his shirt back down. The two guys laugh. Zane adds, "It’s good to see you, again. Sorry I haven’t kept in touch."

Dirk shrugs and adds, "I’ve been busy with school, and messing around with my frat bros. My frat bro, Two Can Sam, has been crashing at my place. Dude is a laugh riot. Always eating my food, and punching holes in my walls." Dirk laughs.

Zane blinks. "Uh… He sounds great. Anyway, looks like Esme’s about to announce the challenge. Good luck out there."

Dirk nods. He replies, "Thanks, mate. I’ll smuggle a sandwich for you when I’m at the mess haul next." Dirk jabs Zane’s stomach, again.

"Uh," Zane responds. "Thanks… Speaking of the mess haul. I better get back to scraping gum from under the tables." Dirk’s eyes widen. Zane narrows his eyes and adds, "That’s code for making important business decisions." Dirk nods and waves as Zane walks away. Dirk then shakes his head with a frown after Zane walks away.

Esme announces, "For the next challenge, each team will compete in a relay. Since The Black Swans have nine team members, only nine of the men will compete, but that will be decided later. Each team will select two contestants to work on transporting a crate to the building station, all while walking over a balance beam. The team that makes it there first can decide not only who on their team will do the next portion, but who will compete in the next portion for the other team. Here, three contestants will open the crate and assemble a dunking booth. When finished, the fastest team will select the next two contestants to fill the dunking booths with water with the provided buckets for both teams to its final location. There, the fastest team will select the contestants that will be throwing baseballs at the target on the dunking booth, and also the contestants that will be placed in the dunk tank. First contestant to dunk the member of the opposing team, after hitting the three targets, wins invincibility." Esme smiles and tilts her head. "Does everyone understand?" The contestants mostly scratch their heads.

Quimberly responds, "Obviously." The others nod, as if they also understand.

Tamira looks concerned. She raises a well manicured hand. "Yes. Are there any roles in this challenge that don’t require manual labor and/or getting dumped into swamp water?" Esme shakes her head.

Luke interjects as he looks over, "In my humble opinionation, Lake Wawanakwa is more of a muck consistency than swamp water… You can tell, on account of how mucky it is."

Tamira grimaces. She looks over at Jerome who looks smug. She asks, "Why do you look so comfortable?"

Jerome reminds her, "We get to sit people out, boo."

Tamira responds with a smirk, "You do know if we’re leading, we can pick you to be the dunkee, right?"

Jerome attempts to keep from laughing. He asks rhetorically, "You really think that anyone’s picking me over power mullet, over there?" Tamira looks over at Dirk with a finger in his ear, and then back at a smirking Jerome with a frown.

Esme tilts her head the other direction. "It seems like everyone’s ready. We will select the starting contestants for each team."

Time has elapsed. Esme announces, "The Black Swans have chosen Zoe and Hae Won to be the lifters for the first part of the challenge. Luke and LeVar will be carrying the crates for The Raging Bulls." Luke holds his hand up for a high five. LeVar looks at him for a moment before looking back at Esme. Luke keeps his hand up awkwardly for roughly thirty seconds. Esme is staring at Anders, wearing small swim trunks and a pair of goggles. She clears her throat and continues, "Looks like everyone’s ready to go. On your marks, get set… Go!"

Zoe and Hae Won start for their team, and Luke and LeVar begin the heavy lifting for their team. LeVar looks over at the women and smirks, as he and Luke take an early lead.

Zoe asks Hae Won, "I know I was one of the obvious choices for this lag of the challenge, but why did you volunteer?"

Hae Won appears to be struggling under the weight of the crate. She responds between staggered heavy breathing, "I didn’t want… to be typecast… as a brainy Asian."

Zoe blinks as she asks, "Wait… When did anyone think you were brainy?"

Hae Won narrows her eyes. "How badly… do you want me… to drop this on you… right now?"

Zoe forces a smile. She assures, "I was just messing around." Hae Won rolls her eyes.

Esme announces, "Luke and LeVar are already at the balance beam. Zoe and Hae Won are a little more than halfway there." Both teams cheer on their respective team members.

LeVar insists, "Hey, buddy. Why don’t we turn things around?"

"How do you mean?" Luke asks, looking confused.

"One of us is going to have to walk on the balance beam backwards, and I think it should be you," LeVar explains.

Luke responds, with a hand behind his head, and holding up the crate with his other hand with ease, "Golly. I’m not sure if I…"

"So it’s decided," LeVar replies. LeVar turns as Luke hesitates for a moment, but then complies. Luke begins walking backwards. After being on the balance beam for a few steps, Luke loses his footing and steps off of the balance beam.

LeVar instructs, "Get back up."

Esme calls out, "Um… I’m sorry. But if you step off of the balance beam, you need to start over."

LeVar rolls his eyes and mutters, "Way to go, heehaw." Luke forces a smile and awkwardly laughs.

After stumbling a few times, Luke suggests, "Maybe we should try easing up a little. Just like riding a bull."

LeVar raises an eyebrow. He replies, "Whatever you want to do. I’m not the type to call the shots."

"You…" Luke begins. "Uh… Okay. Much obliged." The guys begin to walk across the balance beam, slowly, as LeVar rolls his eyes.

They make it about a third of the way across, as Esme announces, "The Black Swans are now at the balance beam! The guys have almost lost their lead."

LeVar states, "Hm, I wonder why that is."

Luke asks from the other side of the crate, "What was that, pard?" LeVar doesn’t respond to the big farmer.

Zoe and Hae Won begin crossing the balance beam as Zoe repeats the mantra of, "In through the nose, out through the mouth…"

LeVar looks over as the women are close to overtaking them. He turns back toward his crate, and directs, "Pick up the pace, farm boy."

"You got it," Luke replies, as he forces a smile. LeVar looks down and realizes his own foot is on the ground. He looks over at Esme who is not looking his direction. He smirks and puts his foot back on the balance beam and continues forward.

"It’s neck and neck," Esme announces. She looks contemplative. "It reminds me of competing against Katrina and Sabrina."

Anders replies, "Ja. My sister cousins."

"Neck and neck?" Blair responds. She thinks. "I don’t remember them being particularly close in challenges."

Esme blinks. She responds, "No. I was referring to their unnaturally inhuman long necks." Blair scratches her head.

Anders nods. "Ja. Our family is most giraffe like."

Esme turns her attention back to the challenge. She announces, "The Black Swans have taken the lead!" LeVar glares in Luke’s direction.

Angelo steps up. He says, "Excuse me, Esme."

"Yes, Angelo?" Esme asks.

Angelo states, "I know this is my team, but I am nothing if not honest. When you were distracted by looking at Anders’ most impressive physique, LeVar stepped off of the balance beam and put his foot back up without your noticing."

LeVar looks livid. He assures, "Mr. Perfect is seeing things. I almost stepped off, but I didn’t!”

Esme insists, "I know Angelo has no reason not to be telling the truth here. I’m sorry gentlemen, but I’m going to ask you to start at the beginning of the balance beam."

As he and Luke return to the front of the balance beam, LeVar mutters something that sounds like, "Rassafrassa mishamasha."

The other members of The Black Swans huddle together. Quimberly states, "Even without me competing in the first portion, it looks like we will be deciding who will compete in the next portion."

"Any suggestions?" Patsy asks.

Grace suggests, "We should use up their stronger contestants on this portion, so they can’t compete in the throwing, or water collecting."

"Oh, that’s smart," Ruth assures, with a nod. "What about our team?”

Grace explains, "I say it should be me, because I’m a beast at putting together puzzles. Ruth, because you do art stuff, which is kind of like puzzles… And… Yuko, because she looks smart."

Quimberly shrugs and says, "Sounds fine to me."

Grace states in confessional with a smirk, "I’m not really good at putting puzzles together. I just said that because I am not about to risk being put in that dunk tank."

Zoe and Hae Won complete the balance beam and Hae Won quickly lets go of the crate before she falls to the ground. Esme announces, "The Black Swans completed the first portion. Go ahead and decide who will compete in the dunk tank assembly portion."

Quimberly steps forward. She states, "For our team, we are choosing Grace, Ruth, and Yuko, I think it was." She glances at her fingernails, looking generally disinterested.

Esme nods. She asks, "And for the men?"

Quimberly states, "We choose Anders, Angelo, and…" Quimberly looks over at the spot where the dunk tanks will be set up, and then over at The Raging Bulls. "Herman."

"Herman?!" Grace shouts with a raised eyebrow. "I thought we agreed on the…" Grace sighs and puts her hands forward. "It’s not worth the drama."

Grace states in confessional, with her arms folded, "What kind of mess? Look, if our losing streak continues, I don’t want to be the one on the chopping block for speaking up. I know when to pick my battles."

Esme nods. She explains, "Anders, Angelo, and Herman will start once LeVar and Luke finish the first part of the challenge. The women will start right now."

"You got this!" Zoe cheers, not seeming winded, as Hae Won continues to breathe heavily while lying on the ground. Zoe looks down at Hae Won. She gleefully clasps her hands together. "Another pet project."

Grace and Ruth begin working on the dunk tank. Grace holds up two pieces and states, "I have no idea where these go."

"I thought you said you were good at puzzles?" Ruth asks with a raised eyebrow, as she connects two pieces of the puzzle.

"I’m more of a slide puzzle kind of person," Grace glares over at Yuko, who is standing to the side. "Besides. At least I’m trying to help."

Yuko replies, "I vowed not to do anything that might effect the outcome in any given way."

"Understandable," Blair responds.

"It is n…" Grace begins. She sighs. "Fine. Whatever." She continues to try to connect pieces, but is not successful. She looks to the side with a playful smile, as Ruth glares at her.

Esme looks on as time elapses. She observes, "The Black Swans are almost halfway done with their dunk tank, despite Ruth being the only one doing much of anything." She looks over at the men, and smiles slightly. "The Raging Bulls are done with the balance beam. They can begin assembly!" LeVar drops the crate and it begins tilting toward Angelo, who is on the ground tying his shoe. His eyes widen as he looks up, but Luke puts an arm out to stop it from falling on Angelo.

Luke assures Angelo, "Don’t worry, pal. I got you."

Angelo directs, "Okay, Anders, and Herman. We may be behind…"

"And whose fault is that?” LeVar mumbles.

"But we can do this." Angelo encourages.

Herman stretches his arms out as he cracks his knuckles. He boasts, "Ye only hath the star pupil from my academy’s model club in your immediate presence."

Anders smirks, points at himself with his thumb, and assures, "And I am from Sweden. Land of furniture assembly."

"Wait," Evan states. "Herman was a model?" He blinks.

"Maybe my confidence is misguided," Skylar begins, "but I’m feeling slightly better about our odds."

The guys begin to work on their dunk tanks, after opening the crate. Evan eyes Anders up and down. "Bro… Why are you in your swim trunks?" Dirk’s eyes are wide as he stares at Anders.

Anders responds, "Anders was unsure of place in challenge, so I was prepared for dunk tank."

"Fair enough," Evan responds. "That’s not a bad idea." He begins taking off his shirt.

Dirk places a hand on Evan’s arm. He assures, "No one wants that."

"Millions of women would disagree with that." Evan shrugs and puts his shirt back down. "What was with the trance?"

Dirk responds, "What are you talking about? I’ve been totally focused on the challenge." Evan blinks.

Evan responds, "Riiiiiight. Whatever you say, m…." Evan looks over at Ruth, and freezes midsentence as he stares at her. Dirk waves his arms in front of Evan who doesn’t seem to notice.

Esme comments, "The Raging Bulls have surpassed The Black Swans in the second portion of this challenge. It appears that Grace is no longer helping to assemble the dunk tank."

Ruth glares over at Grace. Grace explains, with a wince, "Hey. I am helping by not getting in your way."

Ruth is shown in confessional with her arms folded. "I have a feeling that Grace was insincere in her claims of being a puzzle master. I mean… it’s almost like she volunteered to avoid getting dunked…" Ruth pauses as her eyes get wide.

Angelo cheers, "Great job, guys!", as he, Anders, and Herman make quick progress during their portion of the challenge. "Let’s beat the crud out of those…" Anders and Herman look over at Angelo with surprised looks. Angelo puts a hand behind his head and laughs. "That is… Let’s do our best." The other guys blink.

Esme observes the progress. She announces, "The fellas have completed their portion of the challenge. They get to pick the competitors for the water relay portion of the challenge."

The men huddle together quickly. Skylar suggests, "For the women I say we pick Blair and Patsy. I’d say, for our team, pro athlete Evan and I are the best options left, if you want to go raw cardio on this portion…"

"I… uh…" Evan stutters.

Angelo responds, "Good choice."

LeVar shrugs and adds, "Makes sense to me."

"So it’s settled," Skylar responds with a smile. He puts an arm around a reluctant Evan and turns toward Esme.

Esme asks, "Who will The Raging Bulls choose to compete at filling the dunk tanks to the dotted line with lake water?"

Skylar answers, "Evan and myself."

Esme nods as she writes something on her notes. "And for The Black Swans?"

"We chose Blair and Patsy," Skylar replies with a smirk.

A no longer breathless Hae Won facepalms. "You got to be kidding me."

Tamira lowers her sunglasses as she looks at herself, then Quimberly, and then the dunk tank.

Tamira admits in confessional, "Ngl, I literally hoped the guys won that section of the challenge at that point. Imo, there was no way they would choose Quimberly to throw the baseballs for our team and have me sit in that dunk tank."

Ruth looks up at her team’s structure, and admits, "Something seems off… like we’re missing a piece."

Tamira looks down, and notices a piece of board for the dunk tank by her foot. She smirks and then attempts to kick the board aside, only to kick it closer to Ruth. Ruth looks down and says, "Oh. Thanks, Tamira. I would have never noticed that."

Angelo raises a hand and states, "I call shenanigans. Tamira should not be allowed to help in this portion of the challenge, as she was not selected."

Esme nods and admits, "I appreciate the sound of your perfect voice." Several eyebrows raise. Esme clears her throat. "And your dedication to the rules. Unfortunately, or fortunately for the women, the rules as stated here…" Esme points to her clipboard, "make no mention of what is not allowed when the puzzle pieces are out of bounds. So what Tamira did was totally fair." The Black Swans cheer and pat Tamira on the back, who winces. Esme continues, "And with that, The Black Swans are done with the puzzle portion of the challenge and Blair and Patsy can begin filling the dunk tank with water."

Patsy looks unsure, as Blair raises her fists in the air and taunts, "You boys are going down!" She high fives Patsy and says, "Let’s do this! Ginger power! Oh, yeah!" Patsy looks slightly more confident. Blair runs off with a bucket, while Patsy follows closely behind.

The Raging Bulls cheer after Evan and Skylar, doing flips but somehow keeping the water within the bucket, return and dump their second buckets full of water into the tank. Skylar runs ahead as Evan lags behind a little. Skylar states, "You’re doing great, man. We have this in the…" Skylar looks back to see Evan looking exhausted while leaning against a rock.

Evan pants. "Go on… without me… Tell my mom I love her."

Skylar stops in his tracks. He walks back to Evan and states, "Evan, my man. You should have told me you weren’t feeling up to this challenge. I would have suggested someone else."

"I didn’t want everyone to know that most of my strength is gone. I guess the kitties out of the sack, now, huh?" Evan insists.

Skylar frowns. "Bro… This is my fault."

Evan grimaces and assures, "You didn’t know. Just keep moving. That’s the only way we have a shot at this."

"I’m not about to let you take the blame for this," Skylar assures. Skylar puts a hand to his chin.

Blair and Patsy return with their third buckets of water, as The Black Swans root for them. LeVar taps his foot and raises an eyebrow and asks, "What’s going on?"

Luke observes, "Our fellas sure have been gone for a long time. I hope they’re alright."

Evan and Skylar emerge from the trees. Evan is propping up Skylar, who is walking with a limp. "What happened?" Cary asks, looking concerned.

"Sorry, guys," Skylar apologizes. “I guess my showboating was a mistake. I fell and landed on my ankle funny."

"Pitfall, does it again," Jerome states with an eye roll.

"Don’t call me Pitfall," Skylar retorts. "My name is Sky…"

Jerome smirks and says, "Then Skyfall it is." Skylar blinks.

"Anyway…" Skylar looks over at Evan. "Good thing I had my man E Swizzle here to help me back." The guys empty their buckets into the tank.

"Skylar, you should sit out to avoid hurting yourself further," Angelo suggests.

Skylar responds as he forces a smile, "No way. We may be a little slower, but like the saying goes, ‘two buckets are better than one’." The others blink. "I’ll be fine, as long as I have Evan’s support." He looks over at Evan and winks. Evan frowns and nods. LeVar has a hand on the bridge of his nose. Evan and Skylar walk back behind the trees.

After a few steps into the wooded area, Skylar looks back. "I think they bought it." He smirks and then lets go of Evan and goes back to walking on his own. He assures, "Okay. They can’t see us, now. You’re free to keep a pace that you’re comfortable with."

"You didn’t have to do that," Evan insists. He looks down at the ground.

"Nonsense," Skylar responds. "It was my fault you were struggling, and if it makes you save face, I’d gladly take the fall." Skylar winces. "Poor choice of words." Evan holds back a laugh. "Now let’s get a move on."

The guys walk back toward the lake. Evan stops for a moment. He says, "Skylar?"

Skylar turns back and asks, "Yeah?"

Evan says, "Thanks." Skylar smiles and nods.

After several laps, Esme and the contestants on the sidelines wait in anticipation for the results of the race. The leaves rustle as the others look hopeful. Blair and Patsy run out from the trees. The men sigh in a disappointed manner, while The Black Swans cheer. "Let’s go, girls!" Zoe shouts out.

Patsy insists with a smirk, "Slow and steady wins the race."

Blair dumps her bucket of water into the dunk tank. She asks, "Which one of us is ‘Slow’ and which is ‘Steady’?" Patsy doesn’t honor the question with a response as she too unloads the contents of the bucket into the dunk tank.

Esme raises an arm and calls out, "The Black Swans’ are moving on to the next part of the challenge. Please select your participants as the dunker and the dunkee, as well as the guys."

Tamira gulps. She pleads, "Swans, please don’t make me the dunkee. I… I am literally an expert ball thrower. Served three years as ball throwing machine at a batting cage… Yeah. That’s it!"

Hae Won looks at Tamira and then at Esme. "Yeah. We’re going to have Quimberly toss, and Tamira as the dunkee."

Tamira folds her arms, narrows her eyes, looks to the side, and comments, "You are totes going to regret this…"

Evan helps Skylar as he hobbles back to the dunk tank. "Way to go, Skyfall," LeVar sarcastically congratulates.

Cary claps by himself and assures, "Yeah. Way to not give up, guys. You’re doing great." LeVar rolls his eyes, as Herman gives Cary a side glare. Grace looks over at the guys and then whispers something to Hae Won, who nods with a smirk.

"We would have kept our lead if not for…" LeVar begins.

Skylar calls out, "If you call me Skyfall, one more…" Skylar trips, and falls forward. The water from his water bucket launches into the air and drenches LeVar. LeVar looks livid as he glares at Skylar. Skylar looks up from the ground. He relents, "Skyfall it is…" He forces a smile in LeVar’s direction. Evan empties his bucket into the dunk tank, and then looks down at Skylar. He helps him to his feet.

Esme announces, "Even just with Evan’s water, the guys are past the dotted line and can move on to the next portion of the challenge." Esme looks down at her clipboard. "The women have selected Dirk as the dunkee, already in position…"

"No surprise there," Evan reacts.

Esme goes on, "And the ball tosser is… Cary."

“Me?" Cary asks with a confused look. Grace looks at Hae Won and nods with a smirk.

Zoe cheers, "Cary, you got this! Do it for the thousands of chubby children seeing themselves when you’re on screen." Cary scratches his head as he looks over at Zoe.

Quimberly picks up a baseball and looks at it. She lets out a yawn. She tosses the ball and knocks down the first of three targets on the dunk tank. "Lucky throw!" Dirk shouts with his hands around his mouth. "Boo!"

Quimberly sighs. "This is too easy." Quimberly closes her eyes and throws the next ball, knocking down the next bullseye.

Cary looks over and takes a deep breath. He says to himself, "You can do this, Care. All I got to do is just believe. Remember your time on The Humane League." Tamira is in her dunk tank crossing her fingers. Cary tosses the first ball and strikes and knocks down the first target. Quimberly nonchalantly throws her baseball in the opposite direction of the target.

Tamira pleads, "Cary! Please don’t do this!"

Cary frowns. He insists, "My team is counting on me." He throws the second ball, knocking down the second target.

Quimberly has her hands in her pockets as she looks generally disinterested. The others follow with their eyes as Quimberly’s baseball bounces off of a tree branch, then lands on the roof of one of the cabins, rolls down to the gutter, and then down the spout.

Cary looks over at Quimberly. Tamira pleads, "Please, Cary! Remember the fun we had on Wilderness!"

Cary looks reflective, as he says, "Yeah, we…" He pauses. "Wait. I wasn’t on that season!" Cary gets ready to toss the ball, closes his left eye, and stick his tongue out as he raises a leg.

Quimberly’s baseball lands on a nearby plank atop a stone, making it tilt upward and scrape against a craft services table leg, being balanced on a phonebook. The leg lifts up and a ham slides off of its plate and begins to roll down the table.

Tamira starts to get teary eyed as she looks down at the water. "Cary, I beg you not to throw that ball!" Cary pauses. "Please!" Tamira shouts, "Cary! Have a heart!"

Cary lowers his leg, and looks down. He drops the ball to the ground. He admits, "I can’t do it."

"What?!" LeVar shouts. His gaze shifts toward the cabin.

The ham lands on the plank on the side opposite of Quimberly’s baseball, and when it lands, it causes the baseball to launch at the target. Dirk’s eyes get wide. He whispers, "Crud." The third target is downed and the seat from under Dirk gives out and drops the smug, blond guy into the water. The women and Evan cheer as Dirk looks up from the water. Tamira lets out a big sigh of relief as an intern takes her hand and leads her from the dunk tank.

Esme announces with a frown, "It is with a heavy heart that I announce that The Raging Bulls have lost this challenge."

Blair turns to Patsy, as she gestures toward Esme, and asks, "Was she this sad when we lost challenges?" Patsy shakes her head.

Esme blushes. She adds, "Oh, and The Black Swans have won the challenge. The guys will need to eliminate a contestant with Chris at the elimination ceremony."

Zoe throws a fist to the air. Looks around and says, "Woo?"

The guys look frustrated as they leave the challenge area. Luke looks down. He says to Skylar, "Hey, pally! It looks like your ankle is better." Skylar looks down as LeVar looks over with a raised eyebrow.

Skylar says, "Oh, right." He begins limping and pretending to wince.

Luke smiles. He looks down. "Golly. My mind must be playing tricks on me. I thought you done hurt your other ankle."

Skylar blinks. He insists, "When I fell the second time, I must have tweaked the other ankle." Skylar begins to awkwardly waddle toward his team’s cabin.

Luke laughs. He states, "Classic Skyfall." Skylar winces.

LeVar, Evan, Jerome, and Herman are sitting on the Dock of Shame. Jerome states, "Hoo boy. That challenge was a mess."

LeVar admits, "Normally, who to vote out is obvious."

"It is?" Herman asks with a raised eyebrow.

Jerome states, "If you don’t know, then it’s you, boo." Herman’s eyes get wide.

LeVar nods. "But this time we have at least four options.

Herman gulps nervously. "Is one of them me?"

"Who are you thinking?" Evan asks, as he looks down at the water.

"First off," LeVar begins with a finger raised. "Luke made us lose our momentum at that balance beam." The other guys nod. "Second, we had Angelo being the mighty rule enforcer." The others nod. "Third…" LeVar raises his third finger. "We had Skyfall completely bombing the challenge, not to mention him being a massive liability." Jerome and Herman nod, as Evan looks to the side. "And last we have Cary who literally dropped the ball in the challenge."

Jerome twirls a curl in his hair around a finger. He admits, "I think if we want to win challenges moving forward, the answer is obvious, boys."

Dirk, Angelo, and Anders are sitting together in their cabin. Dirk turns to Angelo and insists, "Hey, man. You have got to stop being such a goodie goodie with the rules."

Angelo insists, "Even if I said nothing, we would be disqualified when the footage was reviewed. My being honest gave us a fair shot."

Dirk shrugs. He admits, "There were far worse mistakes made."

Anders asks, "Who do we vote for?"

Dirk states, "I think the answer is obvious."

Anders reminds, "You remember we can’t vote for the women, ja?"

Dirk’s jaw drops. He asks, "We can’t?"

Evan is shown walking to the confessional. Skylar steps out. He says, "Oh, hey, bud. I was wanting to meet up with you." He buttons up his pants. "I have great news for you."

"What’s that?" Evan asks, as he looks to the side.

"I haven’t been hearing your name floating around, so our little plan seemed to work!" Skylar explains.

Evan responds, "That’s great. Thanks again for that."

"Dude," Skylar replies. "You’re like my brother. You know I have your back." He scratches the back of his head. "So, uh… Has my name come up, at all?"

Evan finally makes eye contact with Skylar. He says, "You have nothing to worry about." Skylar pumps his fist.

At the campfire ceremony, Chris explains, "This is your first visit to the campfire ceremony. In this game, the marshmallow means your life. If you do not receive a marshmallow, you must leave on The Boat of Losers… immediately. So let’s get this started." Chris cracks his knuckles. "The first marshmallow goes to… Jerome." Jerome catches his marshmallow with a smirk. "A wonder what sitting out of a challenge can do for your game.”

"This time around," Jerome replies, "I’ll take it."

Chris goes on, "The next safe contestants are… Anders, Herman, Dirk, Evan, and Brent." The guys catch their marshmallows. "Next up is… Luke, Cary, and… Skylar." Skylar gives a big sigh of relief.  He holds up a thumbs up toward Evan. "That leaves Angelo and LeVar, and two marshm…" Chris double checks the platter of marshmallows. He sighs. "What is up with this season?" He tosses a marshmallow off camera. "Hey, intern. Get rid of this." Chris rubs his forehead. "Alright. Now we have one marshmallow. It belongs to…"

"LeVar." LeVar catches his marshmallow, and looks relieved.

LeVar states, "I wasn’t worried." The muscular teen crosses his arms.

Chris states, "Sorry, Angelo. You have been voted out of the competition. The Boat of Losers awaits."

Angelo nods and stands up. "It’s been fun, guys."

Dirk’s jaw is dropped open. He stands and asks, "Angelo? The dude is literally perfect." He gestures to Angelo’s head down to his feet.

Jerome says, "Shoot. That’s why we had to take him out while we could."

"He’s our only hope against the Q word on the other team," Dirk states with a frown.

"You mean ‘queen’?" Jerome asks.

Angelo puts a hand on Dirk’s shoulder and forces a smile. He assures, "It’s okay. Really. I mean, I did better than last time."

Dirk nods. He states, "You’re too good for this game…"

Angelo waves to his former team members and says before walking to the Dock of Shame, “Play fair." The other guys wave. Once aboard the Boat of Losers, and sitting down, Angelo admits, "I have to be honest… I don’t know what it is, but it stung harder this time. I’m still rooting for the guys, though. On a positive note, I’m looking forward to seeing Isabella, again."

Evan is shown in confessional, "It almost didn’t go this way… The other guys wanted to send Skylar home, but I felt I owed him. After what he did for me… I just… couldn’t let him go." Evan waves at the camera. He says, "Sorry, Angelo. I told the guys that this was our only chance to prevent a Quimberly and Angelo final two." Evan holds up all four fingers on one of his hands. "I also pointed out that there is a whopping four guys from Total Drama Reality on our team, now that Herman is back." Evan sighs. "It took a lot to turn the tide, but Skylar… I feel like we’re even, bud. Thank you."

Chris stands on The Dock of Shame, accepting money from three disappointed interns. He licks his thumb and counts the money. He addresses the camera, "You wouldn’t believe how many people placed their bets on that guy." Chris laughs. "Anywho… Thank you for watching. Be sure to tune in to our next exciting episode of Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst!"

### Chapter 5 - Game Show Up and Show Out

Chris McLean sips from a straw in a coconut. He tosses it to the side. In response, an offscreen intern shouts, "Ow!"

Chris does not bat an eye. He greets, "Welcome to another all new episode of Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst! On our last episode, the game got serious as the men on The Raging Bulls got on each other’s nerves enough to splinter into several different alliances. In the end, LeVar and his alliance targeted goodie goodie Angelo for being a stickler to the rules, and Mr. Perfect was sent packing. How will events unfold with the campers on tonight’s episode?"

Herman is shown in confessional. He admits, "Voting out Angelo was a trial, indeed, especially whence I learned that unscrupulous cad Cary was here.." Herman clears his throat. "Angelo was one of the only people that was kind to me… on my first season." Herman looks to the side. "But it twas a most unfortunate scroll that needed to be unfurled.”

Luke, Cary, and Skylar walk together after the elimination. Skylar points at Luke and asks, "You gonna eat that?"

Luke looks down at the marshmallow in his hand and admits, "Golly. This is the first one of these beauts I ever done got. I’m gonna savor it." Skylar smiles and nods, as he turns forward. "Shame about Angelo, though. He seemed like a upstanding gent."

Skylar nods. "I honestly always hated that part of the game. I wish we could all be friends."

Luke puts a hand on the back of his head. "I reckon I may be naive, but I don’t see that happening."

Skylar looks down. He quietly says, "Yeah…" He looks over at Cary. "Hey, Care. You’ve been pretty quiet."

Cary looks over and says, "Huh? Oh, right." Cary is holding his bag with him. Skylar looks down at it. "Hey, guys. I’m gonna hit the showers."

Luke asks, "Now? I reckon it’s half past midnight. The rest of the guys will just go down there in the morning if you want to wait ‘til then."

Cary forces a smile and assures, "It’s just part of my routine back home. Don’t wait up for me. Have a good night if you’re asleep before I get back." Cary walks off by himself into the night. Luke turns to Skylar, and Skylar responds with a shrug.

Cary is shown in confessional sobbing. He admits, "I didn’t want the other guys to see me cry like this. I’m just racked with guilt over what happened to Angelo. He’s a good guy, and didn’t deserve what happened to him, like I…" Cary pauses. He holds his bag up. "I was fully prepared to go home. Not sure why the other guys kept me around… Anyway… time to hit the showers." He sighs.

Cary steps out of the confessional and walks into Evan. Cary reacts, "Whoa." Evan stumbles back. "I’m so sorry. Are you okay?"

Evan steadies himself. He nods and assures, "Yeah, mate. No worries." Evan pauses. "Are you… crying?"

Cary forces a smile as he wipes his eyes. "It’s just…" Cary winces, "allergies."

Evan nods. "I’ll see you back at the cabin." Cary nods and walks away. Evan looks after him with a raised eyebrow.

Cary walks into Ruth. "Ouch," Ruth states.

"Watch where you’re walking, buddy," Hae Won states. "That’s my friend you just walked into."

"I’m super sorry," Cary apologizes. "I should be more careful."

"It’s okay, really," Ruth assures.

Hae Won adds, as she points with two fingers at her eyes and then at Cary, "Yeah, well I’ve got my eye on you, buddy." An embarrassed looking Cary bows and excuses himself before heading off.

Yuko stands beside Evan. She looks on at Cary with a frown. Before walking back into the bushes. Evan watches after her with wide eyes. He asks, "Who even was that?"

"Are you talking to yourself?" Hae Won asks as she steps up to Evan with Ruth.

Evan jumps. "Uh. No. Oh. Hey."

Hae Won rolls her eyes and admits, "You definitely wouldn’t be talking to yourself if you were looking for anything resembling intelligent conversation…"

Evan responds with a laugh. He adds. "That is so funny. Why are you here, anyway?" Hae Won shifts her eyes toward the confessional outhouse and then back at Evan. "Oh," Evan reacts. "Me, too." He holds the door open and insists, "Why don’t you go first?"

Hae Won shakes her head and replies, "You’ve been here longer than me. Don’t treat me any different because I’m a woman and/or stunningly gorgeous."

Evan looks surprised. He nervously assures, "No, it’s really nothing like that. If you’d rather not, I am more than…"

Hae Won pushes past Evan and states, "If you insist." She shuts the door behind her.

Evan stands around awkwardly. He asks Ruth, "So why are you out here?"

"To protect Hae Won from predators," Ruth answers.

Evan assures, and shakes his head, "I didn’t see any bears or wildlife out here, so…" Ruth narrows her eyes as she looks at Evan. He pauses. "You, uh, aren’t talking about wildlife, are you?"

In their cabin, LeVar and Herman sit on the bottom bed of their bunk bed. Herman is holding a binder filled with trading cards as LeVar explains, "This one is a shiny, mint, second edition Zarichard."

"Is first edition really that uncommon?" Herman asks.

LeVar’s eyes shift back and forth. He raises a hand to the side of his mouth and explains, "There are rumors that the first edition never actually existed."

Herman’s eyes widen. He replies, "Zounds! That is most rare." LeVar nods rapidly.

On the other side of the cabin, Brent looks around the cabin. He settles on Skylar and asks, "Wasn’t Cary with you guys?"

Skylar nods. He explains, "He’ll be back in a little bit. He ran to the showers."

"At this hour?" Brent asks.

Luke nods and adds, "Gosh. We done thought that was odd, too."

Herman looks over at the others, and then back at LeVar’s card collection with a frown. LeVar purses his lips and asks, "What’s up?"

Herman insists, "Nary a thing. Let’s get back to your precious collectibles."

LeVar looks at Herman and strokes his chin. He deduces, "You reacted when they mentioned that Cary guy… Didn’t you want to vote him out last time?"

Herman’s face gets a little red. He keeps his head down and states, "I assure you that you are mistaken, good sir."

LeVar assures, "You can talk to me, little dude."

Herman lets out a long sigh. He admits, "On my last season… Cary and I didn’t get along the best…"

LeVar asks, "Yeah? Are we talkin’ he voted against you, or…"

Herman explains, sounding more angry, "He was nothing but a cad." LeVar’s eyes get wide. "He made my life miserable there."

LeVar frowns, and exhales abruptly. He admits, "If there’s anything I can’t stand, it’s bullies."

"I don’t really want to talk about it," Herman assures. He turns back to the card collection. "What did you say this one was called? Jifflypop? And this one was… Lostboise?"

LeVar cracks his neck. "I guess that’s for the best, because you don’t want to see how I would rough him up for messing with you." Herman blinks a few times.

LeVar and Herman are shown outside the men’s shower. "What art the plan?" Herman asks.

LeVar is knelt on the ground digging through a duffel bag. He throws a can of shaving cream over his shoulder, followed by a can of nuts that hits the ground and fake snakes pop out of it. He asks, "Now, you’re positive you want to go through with this?"

Herman is dressed in a black cloak. He nods, "Aye."

"This guy must be a real jerk if someone as cool as you is this set on revenge so many years after your first season," LeVar states.

Herman looks to the side. He admits, "My time on the show really stunted me… I was afraid for a long time of what might happen if I stepped out of my comfort zone. I was so comfortable with who I was, and people like Cary made me question that confidence." Herman looks down. "Verily…"

LeVar puts a hand on Herman’s shoulder. He admits, "I was getting pretty heated during the challenge, yesterday. I think I might have lost my cool, maybe just a little bit." LeVar grits his teeth. "But none of what happened compared to what you’ve had to deal with." Herman looks up at LeVar. "If I knew what this Cary guy put you through, I would have sent him packing with about a third of his teeth left still in his face."

Hae Won walks by. She raises an eyebrow as she stops in her tracks. She asks, "What are you two doing?"

"Nothing, milady," Herman assures with an awkward bow.

LeVar holds up a handsaw and inspects it. "Enacting revenge on Cary," LeVar answers honestly.

Hae Won reaches into her bag and supplies an industrial sized container of maple syrup. She states, "Say no more. You’ll need this."

Herman assures, "Nay. We art only…" Herman turns toward LeVar.

"Thanks," LeVar replies as he accepts the syrup.

Hae Won waves as she leaves the area. "Play nice, fellas."

LeVar is shown in confessional. He admits, "I admit. On Total Deception Island, I wasn’t exactly the nicest to Ollie… Herman reminds me of him in a lot of ways." LeVar folds his arms and looks to the side. He goes on, "This is my chance to redeem myself, you know? Anyways… Cary is going to get what’s coming to him." LeVar cracks his knuckles.

Herman sneaks into the locker room. He looks around, and gulps. The sound of a running shower is heard from behind a wall, as well as Cary humming faintly. Herman takes a deep breath and then tiptoes past the shower entrance. Herman looks hesitant for a moment as he reaches Cary’s bag. He closes his eyes for a few seconds, and hits his knee against the bench that Cary’s bag is resting on. Herman covers his mouth. Cary can be heard from the next room. He asks, "Is anyone there?" Herman holds still. When he opens his eyes, he furrows his brow, takes a towel hanging near the shower and then Cary’s belongings, leaving something on the bench before rushing out.

LeVar greets Herman with a high five, as the door shuts behind him. LeVar asks, "How do you feel?"

Herman smirks and replies, "I’ve never felt a rush like this. I never knew this would feel so satisfying." Herman clears his throat. "My good sire."

LeVar laughs. He assures, "That ain’t nothing. Just wait until the payoff. Now, step aside." Herman walks to the side. LeVar uses his strength to place a large tree limb in front of the door, propping it under the handle. "I cut this down myself." LeVar claps his hands to remove any lingering dirt.

Herman asks, "What doth thou have planned next?"

LeVar puts an arm around Herman’s shoulder. He admits, "Now we wait. Let’s head back." The pair begin heading back to their cabin. Herman nods, unable to keep himself from smiling, as he follows after LeVar.

Cary steps out of the shower, soap and suds covering his eyes and manhood. He reaches for the towel that was hanging from the wall and realizes it is missing. He squats to examine the floor with his hand, still finding nothing. He frowns slightly and quietly acknowledges, "I knew I sensed someone." Cary wipes the soap from his eyes with his forearm. He observes the locker room and asks, "Hello?" After not receiving a response, he walks over to where his bag was and sees nothing but a long, light pink dress. He lets out a slight, disappointed sigh. After putting on the pink dress, Cary heads over to the door with his head held down. He attempts to push the door open, but it doesn’t budge. Cary gives up trying to open the door after the first attempt. Instead of putting in more effort, Cary slouches down onto the floor and wraps his arms around his legs as he holds his head down.

The following morning, Patsy is sitting on a stump near the lake with a notebook on her lap, and a pen pressed against her bottom lip. Hae Won sits on the ground next to her. Hae Won asks, "Writing your next masterpiece?"

Patsy responds, "If only it were that easy."

Hae Won asks, "What do you have so far?" Patsy holds up her notebook, the only thing written on it is the word ‘It’. Hae Won observes, "Original."

Patsy admits, "This is the most I’ve written in months."

Hae Won places a hand under her chin. "Wow. That’s pretty pathetic. You must be here to clear your head to get the creative juices flowing. Get away from the city lights and noise?"

Patsy admits, "Not really. I came here for inspiration. To come up with something the world has never seen before. It’s coming to me." Patsy raises her hands for dramatic effect as she peers focused into the distance. "A group of young people arrive at a mysterious, abandoned campsite only for each of them to get picked off, one by one, with just one left in the end." She turns to Hae Won. "How’s that? Genius, right?"

Hae Won blinks a few times. She responds, "Yup. No one has ever seen a story like that."

Patsy frowns. "Your sarcasm is palpable." Patsy crumples up the top page and tosses it aside.

Hae Won suggests, "I’m no writer, but maybe the source of your inspiration isn’t so much where we are, but…" Hae Won lifts her head up and nods toward Dirk and Anders.

Dirk smashes a glass bottle over his head and shouts, "Woo!"

Anders reacts, "You are in much better spirits than Anders would have expected after your good friend was eliminated, ja?"

Dirk shakes his head. He responds, "This is how I express my grief." A drop of blood rolls down his forehead.

Hae Won goes on, "A pair of knuckleheads that fumble into some greater adventure." She gestures with her shoulder over to Evan signing a glamour shot of himself and holding it out toward Ruth.

Ruth excitedly takes the piece of paper, pulls out a pair of scissors, and then proceeds to cut out a shape. She unfolds the paper with a smile, revealing a string of paper dolls. Brent walks nearby, and Ruth looks down at her paper dolls, back at Brent, and then back at the eerily similar paper dolls. She groans before crumpling them up and tossing them over her shoulder and walks away. Evan looks down with wide eyes. Grace walks by, and Evan pulls out another glamour shot of himself and quickly walks after her.

Hae Won smirks. "The charismatic ladies man, the tortured artist, and the random guy with very little personality that makes the other characters far more interesting by comparison. We’re surrounded by inspiration."

Patsy looks on with her eyebrows raised. She admits, "You’re right. This is gold." She immediately begins writing. "I don’t know how to ever thank you."

Hae Won replies, "Maybe royalties for whatever profit your next novel makes, or however books work."

Patsy states, "No, that’s not it… Oh, I know. You’ll be immortalized as the exotic, brilliant, feisty young woman…" Hae Won smiles slightly. "Only to go out as an underdeveloped, early victim in a cheap ploy to surprise readers." Hae Won frowns.

Hae Won admits in confessional, "Patsy is… nice? Maybe a little lacking in self awareness.”

LeVar and Herman walk together. LeVar laughs. "A pink dress? That is rich. Why did you even pack that? Are you into drag? I mean, it’s totally cool if you are."

Herman admits, "One doth never know when one might meet a fair maiden in need of a garment." LeVar folds his arms and smirks. Herman admits, "Chris said he needed a damsel and a dragon, so I brought the dress to crossplay, but ended up needing to operate the dragon because the interns ‘feared for their lives’, or some such nonsense, so, uh…"

LeVar throws his head back and shouts, "That is so cool!"

"It is?" Herman asks with a grimace.

LeVar nods. "Yeah, you have so much talent, I wish I had some sort of skill… besides my natural athleticism, limitless wealth, and amazing bod." LeVar flexes an arm. Grace is nearby, she looks over at LeVar for a moment, clears her throat, and keeps walking forward. "Good talk," LeVar says as he pushes a surprised Herman into the bushes. He licks his finger tips and smooths down his eyebrows, before following after Grace. Herman pokes his head out of the bushes as he looks on at LeVar and smiles slightly.

Evan steps up to Hae Won, who is now alone. He says, "Uh… hey."

Hae Won raises an eyebrow and replies, "Hey?"

"Crazy competition, huh?" Evan asks.

Hae Won shrugs. "I don’t have much of a frame of reference, since my last time ended rather abruptly."

"Yeah. Me, too, I guess," Evan replies. "It’s nice to be able to hit reset, and have a fresh start."

Hae Won nods. She smirks, slightly, and responds, "You don’t think your mommy is going to pull you from the competition, again?"

Evan responds, "I am never going to live that down, am I?" Hae Won laughs, slightly. Evan laughs, too. He then starts coughing into his hand. His face turns, slightly red. He hoarsely states, "Thanks for chatting with me a little. A little frog in my throat. I’m gonna go." He coughs some more as he walks away. Hae Won looks after him with some concern.

Grace walks up, with LeVar leaving and waving with his sleeves rolled up. Hae Won looks on, smirks. and asks, "You and LeVar, huh?"

Grace rolls her eyes and replies, "LeVar? Please. He’s a literal child."

Hae Won shakes her head. Hae Won states, "He’s an adult." She holds up a business card. "At least, that’s what it says on these cards he was handing out, earlier… It’s okay to admit he’s cute."

Grace frowns. She looks to the side and states, "Yeah… Maybe a little..."

Hae Won stifles a laugh. "Seriously?!" She bursts out laughing. "He literally wears elf ears. ‘Maybe a little’, she says."

Grace glares at her. She mutters, "You set me up…"

Hae Won gets more serious and adds, "Watch out for that guy, though. I mean, he doesn’t exactly give me ‘he who shalt not be named’ vibes, but a showmance in this game means trouble."

Grace awkwardly laughs. She adds, "I am not interested in LeVar. I am far too mature for him."

Hae Won laughs, again. "That is rich. Thanks for the laugh." Hae Won walks off. Grace glares after her.

Most of the players are gathered around Zane. He counts everyone. "Okay, peeps. It’s time for today’s challenge. Everybody present?"

"Yup," LeVar states quickly. The others turn toward Zane.

Zane goes on, "Alright, so we can head over to…"

Yuko raises a hand. She states, "I hate to get involved, but we are missing Cary."

Brent looks over at Yuko and insists, "I was just going to mention that."

"Oh, right," a muddy Luke remembers. "Skylar and I was wondering where he were.”

Skylar adds, "Last we knew, he was heading to the showers last night."

Luke has a towel resting around his shoulders. "We was heading there just now until we noticed a little, wild piggy right for wrestling."

Skylar clears his throat. "Correction. You were distracted by wrestling the piggy…" Skylar shifts his eyes to the right. "I was just looking on in bewilderment."

Luke looks down at Skylar’s muddy knees. He says, "Uh-huh. Whatever you say, Buck-o. Anyways, we was going to check up on that Cary feller once we got to the showers. He might still be there."

Zane pulls out a walkie talkie and explains, "I’ll get some interns to check out the sitch."

LeVar nudges Herman with his elbow. Herman rubs his arm and says, "Oucheth." The others turn to look at Herman. He looks at LeVar who nods at him. Herman addresses the others, "Hark. I doth protest. We should venture there ourselves, because…" Herman pauses. "We hath the utmost concern for his well-being."

"We do?" Zane asks with a blink.

Quimberly pipes in, "You heard the man. Let’s go." Herman looks at Quimberly with a confused look.

Zane waves his hand above his head and directs, "Okay, people. Quimberly has spoken. Let’s roll." The contestants follow Zane toward the showers. LeVar winks at Herman, who nods. They follow along after the others.

Grace raises an eyebrow as she asks LeVar, "So what was that wink about?"

"Just love at first sight," LeVar responds with a smirk.

Grace blinks. She comments, "You were looking at Herman."

"But thinking of you," LeVar states with a growl.

Grace smirks slightly as she rolls her eyes. She states, "What a load of crock… Besides. This wasn’t the first time you’ve seen m… Oh, never mind."

The contestants, and Zane, arrive at the showers. Zane looks around and asks, "So what are we looking for?"

Brent states, "That tree wasn’t there yesterday." He points at the tree blocking the door to the men’s showers.

Blair raises a hand to her chin. She states, "The wind must have knocked it over last night."

Patsy blinks. She says quietly to Yuko, "I don’t remember any wind last night."

Herman states, "He may very well still be trapped inside."

LeVar nudges Herman in the side with his elbow. Herman rubs his side as he looks at LeVar. LeVar asks, "What’s with that comment? You’re gonna blow our cover."

Herman whispers, "I am simply attempting to look innocent by offering suggestions."

"Good thinking, champ," LeVar says as he slaps Herman’s butt.

Herman looks down, as he rubs his butt cheek. He has a moment of realization and says, "Aw, yes. I have heard of this expression of male camaraderie, though I had yet to experience it."

Dirk raises an eyebrow. "You were never in a frat, huh?" Herman shakes his head. "Every Thursday night, my bros would take turns going to town on my keister with a wooden paddle." Dirk releases a nostalgic sigh. Herman blinks.

Anders requests, "Ja, Mr. Luke. Come help me move this foliage."

"Where do you want to haul it, pard?" Luke asks, as he bends down to drag the log.

"Haul?" Anders asks. "Anders does not understand your terminology."

Jerome disinterestedly looks at his fingernails as he states, "And yet you know words like foliage and terminology?"

"Golly. I never done had to talk simpler, before… Uh… let’s drag it over here," Luke explains to Anders. Anders nods as the log scrapes along the door and ground.

"Is someone out there?" A voice calls from behind the door.

"I’d know that chunky voice, anywhere!" Zoe says as she clasps her hands together. "Cary! We’re here for you, and your unsightly obliques."

"So, uh…" Cary begins. "Everyone is out there?"

"Yup," Zane responds. "We have a challenge to get to, so you can come out, now."

Cary opens the door, wearing the long pink dress. Most of the others look shocked, as LeVar and Herman snicker to themselves. Cary sighs and says quietly to himself as he looks down, "This is just lovely…"

Zane adds, his eyes wide, "Uh… When I said you could come out, this isn’t exactly what I meant."

Cary opens the door a little wider. Some of the others laugh. Brent looks above Cary, opens his mouth, but then decides not to say anything. Cary mutters, "This day can’t get much worse…" Maple syrup begins pouring on Cary’s head, drenching him, as most of the other burst out laughing. "And there it is…"

Skylar frowns. He holds his hands up and assures, "A man in a dress being lathered in syrup is no laughing matter." Skylar thinks for a moment, and tries to hold back his own laughter.

Brent looks down, and puts a hand on his opposite arm. Tamira states, "Poor Cary… That is, like, so sad." Brent looks over at her. "That shade of pink is not his color." Brent looks back down at the ground.

Zane wipes a tear from his eye. He states, "Okay, Cary. Go get cleaned up, and meet us…"

LeVar protests, "You made this whole challenge seem pretty urgent. I don’t think we should be showing favoritism to contestants." Yuko steadies her glasses as she looks over at LeVar.

Zane gestures at a syrup covered Cary. "Come on," Zane states. "Look at the guy. We can hold off production for a few…"

LeVar folds his arms. He states, "What do you think Chris would do in this situation?"

Zane sighs. He admits, "Alright. Sorry, Cary. Let’s make our way to the challenge venue."

Cary insists with a smile, "It’s totally okay. I wouldn’t want to be an inconvenience for anybody." Everyone starts following after Zane.

LeVar leans in toward Herman and head nods toward Cary. "This is the guy that used to bully you?"

Herman looks over at Cary and says, "Yay… I mean… I believe so…"

LeVar shoves Herman’s shoulder. "It looks like our little scheme worked." LeVar raises a hand. "Up top." Herman attempts to jump up to reach LeVar’s hand to reciprocate the high five. "Oh, uh… Sorry." LeVar lowers his hand. Herman slaps his hand. He takes a moment to look back at Cary, who has a forced smile on his face.

Patsy walks along with Yuko. Patsy states, "That was quite a scene back there."

Yuko replies, "What, now?"

Patsy rehashes, "The whole… blond sap getting sapped."

"Oh, that," Yuko responds. "Sorry. I’ve had a lot on my mind. I barely even noticed."

Patsy laughs. She continues, "Next you’ll tell me that you didn’t notice that that tree was placed there on purpose." Yuko blinks, as she looks over at the tree.

At the challenge area, Zane leads the contestants toward an extravagant, bright, retro game show set. "Yeesh," Tamira states as she puts on her sunglasses. "If I wanted to stare at such a garish color combination, I would look at Ruth. No offense, dear."

Ruth responds, "None taken. I’d rather look colorful than like a funeral procession."

Tamira lowers her sunglasses and asks, "That wasn’t directed at me, now was it?"

"Nooooo," Ruth replies innocently, as she averts her gaze.

"So," Zane begins. "I wanna make sure I get this right." He wears a pair of reading glasses as he reads the rules of the challenge on a piece of paper, wearing an obnoxious plaid suit jacket. He looks up and announces, "In today’s challenge, we celebrate the anniversary of…" Zane looks back down at the sheet of paper. "Total Drama’s partnership with The Sprinkleverse. Yes. The spectacular emporium that specializes in providing consumers with nothing but sprinkles. Boasting over a thousand varieties of sprinkles…"

"There are that many kinds of sprinkles?" Skylar asks with wide eyes. "I can think of the rainbows… and those little… cinnamon ones?"

"Yes, that’s right," Zane continues. "Over a thousand varieties of sprinkles." Zane pours himself a spoonful of sprinkles and sticks it in his mouth. "Mmm… Dewicious…" Zane states with a mouthful of the confection.

"Can we get on with the challenge?" Jerome asks with his arms folded.

Blair holds a pink bowl of sprinkles and eats them with a spoon. She states, "Mm. These aren’t half bad." With the spoon a few centimeters below her mouth, Blair looks over at Zoe. Zoe looks disappointed with her hands on her hips. Blair takes another bite as she keeps her eyes in Zoe’s direction.

Zane, still with sprinkles on his face, explains, "In today’s challenge, we will be playing ‘Face the Past!’" Prerecorded cheers can be heard overhead, as Zane gestures above himself to a large sign with the name of the challenge on it. Some of the contestants look around to see where the applause is coming from. "Each team has a podium with ten paddles with the faces of some of the series most popular characters tucked in the top shelf." Zane chuckles to himself. "Don’t worry. None of you are on these." He receives a few scowls from the contestants. "One at a time, a contestant will represent their team as I read a trivia question. The representative of each team will hold up the face of the contestant that they think is the answer to the question. The player to raise the correct paddle first will earn a point for their team. First team to five points will win invincibility. Behind the walls where your podiums are, you will find costumes for the challenge, so go ahead and get ready."

The Raging Bulls are behind their wall. The guys hold up garment bags with their names on them. Cary looks around for a few moments, and says, "And of course mine is missing." He walks back on stage.

LeVar nudges Herman with his elbow and states, "Nice touch."

Herman places a hand behind his head and admits, "Twasn’t me." LeVar laughs before putting on a long sleeved beige shirt and black vest.

Herman looks down at his garment bag and suggests, "Maybe I shalt offer this to Cary?" LeVar raises an eyebrow with his arms folded as he looks at Herman. "I… uh… speak in jest?"

LeVar laughs. He slaps Herman on the back, jolting him forward, as Herman’s eyes widen. "Good one, little dude."

Back on stage, most of the contestants are dressed in unfashionable clothing items. Tamira holds up a puce blouse and asks, "Is my team in a position to sit someone out, or…"

Zane shakes his head, as sprinkles fall from his face. The assistant host rubs his chin and acknowledges, "Now that you mention it, The Raging Bulls do need to sit out so they have nine…"

"We’ve discussed it as a group," Skylar begins.

"And we’re dropping the dead weight, Cary," LeVar assures.

Cary responds with a nod, "Checks out."

Zane directs Cary to a pair of stools on the side. "Alright," Zane begins. "Let’s get started."

Blair is in position for The Black Swans, and Dirk is in position for The Raging Bulls. "First question, who has been consistently voted as the most handsome contestant to appear on the show?" Blair and Dirk look through their paddles, and hold up two different faces. Zane looks over at Dirk. "Dirk has selected my good friend, Stevie. As awesome as Stevie is, Dirk has proven he doesn’t know how to pick out a handsome dude."

Dirk points at Stevie’s face and asks, "You’re saying this daddy isn’t number one?" Dirk scoffs. "I demand a recount."

Zane chuckles and says, "Nope. And… Stevie doesn’t have any kids?" Dirk raises an eyebrow. "Anyway… Blair got it right with Beau, though I’m sure I was a close second." The players look on blankly.

Blair still has Beau’s paddle in her hand. She admits, "I don’t think I saw this guy’s season, but this paddle is definitely the best looking."

Dirk mutters, as his eyes shift aside, "I guess…"

Blair looks at Beau’s paddle. "Wait," she asks. "Is this picture made from sprinkles?!" She begins biting Beau’s face, as Zoe shakes her head.

Zane blinks and says, "If you could please refrain from chewing on the props. Thank you." An intern forcibly removes Beau’s paddle from Blair’s hands. Zane clears his throat, and several sprinkles fly out of his mouth. "Moving on to our next two players." Grace and Jerome step up to represent their respective teams. "Players ready?" Grace and Jerome nod. "Okay, next question. Who is considered the best strategic player to ever play the game?" Grace quickly finds and holds up Tsuyoshi’s paddle. Jerome looks up, and then takes his time looking through the paddles. He holds up one of the faces.

"Is that…" Patsy blinks as she comments, "Janice?"

"Who?" Hae Won asks with confused expression.

Brent reminds the others, "She was the one with the dummy."

"Wait, you mean Yi Min’s girlfriend?" Skylar asks, looking bewildered.

"No, like… a puppet dummy," Patsy explains.

Zane announces, "Well, surprisingly, the correct paddle was Janice."

Jerome asks, "Really? I just grabbed one of the many, many random white people.”

Zane shakes his head and says, "Of course that’s not the right answer. Tsuyoshi was the right answer. The Black Swans get the point." The ladies cheer.

"Don’t worry, guys, we got this," Cary cheers from the sidelines. Herman looks back at him and then forward with a frown.

"Next question," Zane announces, with Zoe and Luke standing at their teams’ podiums. "Who is considered the prettiest contestant to ever play the game?"

Zoe quickly selects Alexandria’s paddle and holds it up. "And time!" Zoe shouts, as she awkwardly stands in position with her arm raised, while waiting for a flustered Luke to select his answer.

"Golly," Luke states. "I am not the best judge of this kinda thing… The only thing I’m good at judging is pumpkins at the local fair…" Luke wipes the sweat from his forehead. "I guess I’ll go ahead and pick this one?" Luke smiles wide as his eyebrows show his confusion. He holds up Kendall’s paddle.

Zane slams his hand on his host podium. "See! I’m not the only one that thought Kendall was a girl!"

Luke holds Kendall’s paddle so he can look at it. He responds, "Gee willikers. This is a lady? I thought it was a right gentleman."

Grace has her arms folded as she turns to Zane and asks, "You think women can only be ‘pretty’?"

Zane tugs on his shirt collar, and states, "No, of course not… Ahem… Luke made the correct, totally appropriate choice. The score is two for The Black Swans and one for The Raging Bulls. Let’s move right along."

Grace still has her arms folded. She responds with a ‘Mmm-hmm…’

Ruth and Brent wait for their question at their teams’ podiums. Zane holds up a card, and reads, "Which past contestant was considered by fans to be perfectly suited to appear in a fairy tale?"

Ruth quickly selects and raises her paddle. "Too easy," Ruth states. "Not like I’m emotionally vested in this, or anything." Brent reaches for a paddle, but then changes his selection after a moment of hesitation.

Zane surveys the responses. He states, "It looks like Ruth selected Fiona, and Brent went with Anneliese." Some of her team members give Ruth a thumbs up. "The correct answer is… Anneliese. Point for the guys."

"Anne…" Ruth begins. She looks at her paddle, and back at Zane. "Not like I care, or anything, but…" She points at the Fiona paddle. "Wasn’t she, like, a literal fairy?"

"Hey! Listen!" Herman interjects. He clears his throat and states, "Whilst fairies were a staple of French fables, princesses have become more of a trademark of the genre in the modern era."

Ruth shrugs and admits, "I guess that makes sense."

Cary cheers from the sidelines, with a wide smile, "Great explanation, Herman! You’re a dang genius… Pardon my language." Herman looks back at Cary, and blinks a few times.

The camera is back on Zane, as time has lapsed. He states, "Wowzer. Those last four rounds were really something. We are in a dead heat. The score is tied 4-4. The winner of this round earns invincibility for their team. Let’s bring up Quimberly for The Black Swans, and LeVar for The Raging Bulls."

LeVar looks over at his opponent and gulps. Quimberly smirks and says, "You’re looking kind of nervous."

Blair has her hands cupped over her mouth as she shouts, "Don’t be nervous, just come to terms with the fact that you’re gonna lose." Most of the women, and Zane, laugh.

LeVar assures, "I am nervous… Nervous that you can’t handle all of this." The confident contestant flexes. Zane blinks and then holds up his next card.

Herman looks over at Cary and says to LeVar, "I hope we shalt be victorious."

"Don’t sweat it, little guy," LeVar states audibly. "Besides, if we lose, we know we’re bagging that loser." He nods in Cary’s direction. Cary overhears and looks down, still with a forced smile.

"That’s uncalled for!" Tamira shouts from the other side. She looks down. "Just like this blouse."

"Right," Zoe adds. "Not about the blouse, I would totally wear that."

Tamira replies, "TYSM for confirming its special brand of ugliness."

Zoe continues, "Whoever pulled that juvenile prank on Cary should be ashamed. Just like he and Blair should be ashamed of their bodies." Blair and Cary blink.

Herman heaves a deep sigh. He begins, "I hath something to admit…" The others turn toward him.

LeVar whispers from the side of his mouth in Herman’s direction, "The laddy doth confess too much, methinks."

Herman turns toward Cary and admits, "I was the one who did this to you."

Quimberly raises an eyebrow. Blair gasps, "But why?"

Herman looks down. He explains, "I held on to resentment over my first time on the show for years… Seeing Cary here stirred up a lot of that bitterness…" He turns toward Cary. "I don’t expect you to forgive me for this, but I am so sorry. The memories of our past are still so vivid for me, that I couldn’t separate who you were then with who you are, now. You really have changed."

Cary frowns. He assures, "I would hug you right now, but I’m kind of stuck to this stool." Cary smiles and assures, "But hey… No hard feelings. This was all totally deserved."

"No, don’t say that," Herman responds. He steps back by his teammates. "I… I want you all to vote me out when we lose." His eyes begin to well up with tears.

LeVar adds, "We’re not going to lose. But if we did…" He gestures toward Cary. "This loser is the one we would vote out. He got what was coming to him. If it were up to me, that Cary guy would be leaving on a stretcher." LeVar folds his arms.

"Uh," Brent comments. "That might be a tad harsh."

Zane rubs his chin. He insists, "Now, now. It’s still anybodies’ game…" He looks over at Quimberly, and holds a laugh back. "I can hardly say that with a straight face." Zane clears his throat. He says, "Moving on to the final question. Which contestant is considered to have the most touching story?”

LeVar looks down at the options, and looks flustered. Quimberly reaches for a paddle and begins to lift it partway. She looks over at a tearful Herman, and pauses. LeVar looks over at Quimberly, quickly sifts through the paddles, and raises the one with an image of Ophelia on it. LeVar smiles wide. Quimberly sets that paddle down, and decides to lift up the paddle with the image of Brad on it. LeVar’s face drops. He says to himself, "I got faked out."

Zane looks at both paddles. He announces, "One of you has the correct paddle, and has won the challenge for your team." Zane pats down his hair. "In a shocking turn of events, Quimberly is… wrong. LeVar has won the challenge for The Raging Bulls."

LeVar slams his fist on his podium and shouts, "Yes!"

Blair assures, "It’s okay, Quimberly. You’re still amazing." Herman looks up and over at Quimberly as the women mostly comfort her.

Quimberly frowns and comments, "Don’t take this the wrong way, but I don’t need your pity. I decided to throw this challenge to get you voted out in order to make our team stronger."

Hae Won responds, "That’s not nice. Blair is my friend, kind of, and she can’t help how much of a liability she is."

Blair blinks and says, "Uh… Thank you?"

"The truth hurts," Quimberly replies, as she shifts her head and makes her ponytail sway.

Hae Won responds, "I would watch what you say, or else I’ll…"

"Or else you’ll what?" Quimberly responds, nonchalantly.

"I…" Hae Won begins.

A loud screech is heard overhead. "What’s that?" Tamira asks as she lowers her sunglasses and looks up. A heavy clanking sound is heard, as a bolt from the large sign above Zane comes loose and falls to the ground. Zane falls to the ground and places his hands over his head.

Two more bolts fall loose. Herman shouts, "Quimberly! Watch out!" Quimberly looks over at Herman, who is standing behind LeVar, still with his arm on the podium. LeVar looks on with wide eyes.

Cary has his hands over his mouth. "Quimberly… Somebody help her! I would help but I’m still stuck on this stool…" He attempts to get himself loose.

The sign jolts quickly toward Quimberly, who stands motionless from shock, watching the sign swing toward her. Most of the men rush over to The Black Swan’s side of the stage. The sign is centimeters from a frozen Quimberly, and the others watch as the sign lands with a heavy crash, causing a large cloud of dust and smoke to rise. The contestants still standing shield themselves from the wreckage, as they look on in horror.

Some of the dust settles, as several interns and contestants lift some of the shrapnel and toss it aside. "Hey, everybody," Ruth states. "Look over there!" To the right of the wreckage, Skylar has his arm around Quimberly. Both are crouched to the ground.

The pair stands up, and Skylar shouts, "It’s okay, everyone. Quimberly is just fine." Quimberly looks at Skylar with wide eyes.

"What happened?" Blair asks, anxiously biting her fingernail.

Skylar says, "Not much of anything. Quimberly dived over by me at the last moment. I’m just glad everyone is safe." Skylar winks at her. She nods.

Zane stands up from his hiding space. He dusts himself off as he states, “That was a close call. I’m glad no one is hurt."

Tamira looks from the wreckage, and then over to The Raging Bulls side. She gasps. "OMG! Cary!" Everyone turns their attention toward Cary, who is lying unconscious on the ground in a small pool of syrup.

Zane calls out, "We need a medic over here, immediately."

"What happened?!" Blair shouts. The others rush over.

"Maybe he got hit by part of the sign?" Anders suggests.

Patsy quickly responds, "But there are no pieces of it near him."

LeVar stands near Cary. He has his one of his hands on his head. He claims, "I… I don’t know what happened. One second I was trying to get over to Quimberly, the next second I found him like this."

"Nobody saw what happened?" Zane asks.

One of the cameramen states, "I turned toward the other side when the crash happened. I didn’t catch it on camera."

Zane states, "Maybe one of the stationary cameras caught something… Go check to see if you can find any footage of what happened." The cameraman nods and runs off. He looks around at the contestants. "Did any of you see what anything?"

"I did," a voice admits.

The others turn to see who spoke. "Yuko?" Zane asks. "What did you see?"

Yuko raises her arm as she looks down at the ground. She points at LeVar, who is holding one of his hands with his opposite hand. "I really don’t want to get involved, but…" Yuko looks to the side. "But I saw LeVar punch him." Grace’s eyebrows raise.

LeVar looks flustered. "It’s not like that. I don’t know what happened, I swear to you. When the sign fell, I couldn’t get myself to move. When I finally could run over, Cary must have fallen, or something."

Patsy focuses on LeVar’s hand. She observes, "What’s wrong with your hand?"

LeVar looks down. He states, "Oh, that. I think I must have hurt it when I slammed it down on the podium, or something."

Zane directs the newly arrived medical team, including a tall, muscular, man in ill fitting scrubs with rosy cheeks, rush toward Cary. He surveys the scene. The tall man introduces himself, "My name is Nurse Bigby." He attempts to tug his shirt down. "I want to assure you that everything is going to be alright. What happened here?"

"It appears that Cary hit his head on… something," Zane explains.

"Or someone," Hae Won adds with a glare in LeVar’s direction.

"We’re not accusing anyone of anything," Zane reiterates, as he puts his hands up. "We’ll review the footage and see if that reveals what happened. Chris and Esme are also on their way."

LeVar says quietly to Herman, Jerome, and Grace, "You three have to believe me. Right?"

Jerome nods and assures, "I know you talk a big game, but you’re a big softie, boo." Grace nods. Herman looks down, but eventually nods after a few moments.

Patsy stands near Yuko and Tamira. Patsy asks, "Yuko, I trust you saw what you saw."

"It goes against my code to say something, but I felt I had to," Yuko looks down as she speaks. "It didn’t feel good to say, but observing is what I do."

Patsy narrows her eyes and says, "Hmm…"

Yuko lets out a deep sigh. She states, "Tamira?"

Tamira turns toward her. She asks, "What is it?"

"Since I’ve already felt the need to break my personal code…" Yuko begins. "How much do you know about what happened with Frederick?"

Tamira scratches her ear. She recollects, "I’m not sure what I can add, but… We were hunting for treasure. Frederick got his hand caught in this, like, giant plant, and I tried to get him out of it. Then he got loose, and that’s about all I remember." She pauses. "So, like, I know you were there, or whatever. Did you see anything?"

Yuko sighs. She admits, "When I walked up, he was on top of you. It definitely did not look good.” Tamira’s eyes widen. "It could have been completely innocent, if he maybe fell when you did. It just seems so odd that he got unceremoniously pulled from the game… it felt like they wanted to protect his image, or prevent a scandal."

Patsy puts her hand under her chin. "That is all very unusual. There is one thing that doesn’t quite add up, though…" Tamira and Yuko look in her direction.

"Gather around, everyone!" A voice can be heard calling nearby.

Chris, dressed in a bathrobe, announces, as Yuko, Tamira, and Patsy join the group, "Zane filled me in on the incidents that happened during today’s challenge." Zane and Esme stand behind the host. "One of our interns that wears glasses went through the footage of the incident." Chris snaps his fingers. Zane nods and lifts a monitor and steps just behind Chris who points a remote at the screen. Chris explains, "The tv stand we ordered hasn’t arrived, yet. Now let’s see…" Chris presses play. The footage has no audio. The camera captured Cary sitting on the stool looking concerned, but fairly far from the camera. Part of LeVar’s back is visible from the side, with him slightly closer to the camera. LeVar appears to be shaking on the video. In person, he has his head held down. He looks back up. On the video, LeVar next seems to jolt abruptly to the right closer to Cary. Cary turns his face toward the camera, and LeVar’s arm clearly and rapidly hits him in the eye. Cary and the stool he is seated on fall to the ground, and just the bottom of his legs are visible on camera from that point on. Chris pauses the video. He looks over at the contestants with a frown.

Jerome puts a hand at the back of his neck. He admits, "That didn’t look good, honey."

LeVar states, "That video didn’t show everything. I swear me hitting him was an accident."

"Didn’t you say you hit your hand on the podium?" Grace asks, wiping her forehead with her hand.

LeVar looks down. "I was hoping it was that or a wall, or something. I swear I didn’t have any intention to hit the guy. And you can’t prove it wasn’t an accident."

An intern switches out the video. Chris states, "This is a collection of scenes spliced together. The intern thought it might add context to the situation."

LeVar states, "Here it is. Proof I didn’t do this on purpose. I just helped Herman exact his revenge with the dress, and the syrup…"

Jerome looks over at LeVar. "Wait. You were involved in that?"

LeVar assures, "It was just a harmless prank. This video will prove that’s all I did." He gestures at the screen.

The video begins playing. In the cabin, LeVar says to Herman, "… You don’t want to see how I would rough him up for messing with you." Another clip from the cabin shows LeVar saying, "If I knew what this Cary guy put you through, I would have sent him packing with about a third of his teeth left still in his face." LeVar raises an eyebrow. The next scene plays. LeVar is shown speaking in confessional. He says, "Cary is going to get what’s coming to him." LeVar’s face drops.

Jerome shakes his head and says, "Boo… How could you?"

"This is all being taken out of context," LeVar insists.

Jerome continues, "You can’t deny that you said these things."

The next scene plays, LeVar stating during the challenge, "If it were up to me, that Cary guy would be leaving on a stretcher."

Zoe has her arms folded. She coldly states, "Looks like you got your wish."

LeVar looks lost for words. Chris stops the video. He admits, "I think we’ve seen enough."

"Can I put this down, now?" Zane requests, looking exhausted as he still holds the large monitor.

Chris ignores Zane’s question. Chris states, "In accordance with the rules forbidding violence… I’m sorry, LeVar. You have been disqualified from Total Drama: Worst of the Worst."

"You have to be kidding me," LeVar states as he looks extremely disappointed. He looks at Jerome, Herman, and Grace. "You three have to believe me." They avert their gaze from LeVar. LeVar looks at them, and his disappointment is obvious.

Chris explains, "The Boat of Losers awaits. We’ll have some interns gather your things, and bring them to you."

LeVar continues to hold his arm with his opposite hand as he kicks the ground. "I can’t believe this." The interns arrive and stand around LeVar. He dejectedly walks toward The Boat of Losers, with the interns following after him. He gives one last look toward the other contestants.

Blair waves and shouts out, "Bye, LeVar! Safe travels!" She looks at the somber expressions of the others present, and slowly lowers her hand.

Blair watches with wide eyes as Nurse Bigby walks up to the group and stands next to Dirk. He lifts his shirt to wipe the sweat from his face. Dirk raises his eyebrows as he looks at the hulking male nurse. Nurse Bigby lowers his shirt, smiles, and announces, "I have good news."

"You’re single, and you’re into redheads?" Blair asks, hopefully.

Nurse Bigby responds, looking confused, "Uh… I guess that’s true." Blair pumps her fist. "But what I was referring to was that Cary is conscious, and doing just fine. He should be joining you all again in the morning." The contestants look relieved.

"That’s good to hear," Chris assures. "I’ll be seeing The Black Swans at the campfire ceremony where they will vote out a team member."

"After all that?" Grace asks.

Chris nods. "The women lost the challenge, so it is what it is." Chris puts a hand to his chin. He adds, "’It is what it is’… I should write that down. Anyway, I’ll see you in fifteen minutes." Chris walks away.

Nurse Bigby turns toward Dirk. He says, ”Hey…"

"D-d-d-d-dirk," Dirk responds with wide eyes.

"Okay, D-d-d-d-dirk," the nurse responds. "I was hoping you could maybe collect Cary’s things and bring them to the medical tent? It looks like he needs a change of clothes. Do you think you could do that for me?"

Dirk nods profusely. Nurse Bigby smiles and says, "Thanks."

Hae Won turns to Quimberly and apologizes, "I’m sorry I got so mad with you, before. Serious stuff like this makes you realize how minor other things can be."

Quimberly replies, "It’s fine, really. I know I can be arrogant at times… I’m glad everyone is safe." She looks over at Skylar.

Quimberly is shown in confessional. She admits, "Skylar didn’t admit what he did. He did some flips, swung by a curtain, and got me out of the way of the sign. I know I froze, but… The danger was rather exhilarating."

Patsy, Grace, and Yuko stand together. Patsy has a hand on one of her hips. "This whole thing is most unusual."

Grace replies, "It seemed like an open and shut case, sadly. As much as I… platonically liked LeVar… the evidence was all there. The video, the witness…" She gestures toward Yuko.

Yuko agrees, "I’m confident with what I saw. I wish I didn’t have to say anything, but it seemed necessary."

"It’s just…" Patsy begins. "Why would LeVar be so adamant when all the evidence was there?”

"Trust me…" Grace responds. "I want nothing more than to believe him."

Patsy puts her thumbnail between her teeth. "There’s just a lot to think about."

At the elimination ceremony, Chris states, "I understand that today was… a lot to take in, but you handled it like champs." Chris frowns. "Even though you lost the challenge. Anywho, the votes have been cast, and one of you will not receive a marshmallow. That player must leave on The Boat of Losers, immediately. I’ll hand out the marshmallows." Chris moves the platter of marshmallows to a rock near to him. "The first marshmallow belongs to… Ruth." Ruth catches her marshmallow. "Next up are… Tamira, Grace, Zoe, and Patsy." The women receive their marshmallows. "Quimberly and… Blair." Blair’s eyes are wide as she catches her marshmallow. "That leaves Yuko and Hae Won and one marshmallow…" Yuko looks back at her team. "That marshmallow goes to…"

"Hae Won." Hae Won catches her marshmallow.

Yuko says, "Thanks for honoring my request."

Patsy admits, "I wish you wanted to stay. We could have had all kinds of adventures."

"I no longer felt that I could fulfill my objective," Yuko admits. "This season just was not suited for me."

Chris assures, "We enjoyed having you. Whoever you are."

Yuko nods and makes her way to The Boat of Losers. On the boat, Yuko explains, "There was certainly a lot to observe out here, and I wish I didn’t have to get involved. But… I don’t regret speaking up when I had to." Yuko looks out at the water.

Chris faces the camera. Zane stands beside him, holding up the television from earlier. "Today certainly had a lot happening. We wish the best for everyone involved. However, with LeVar’s disqualification, we are faced with an important decision that we are leaving up to you, the viewer. We have three contestants who were serving as alternates to choose from to take LeVar’s place. Will it be Yancy, the desperate, lovesick short stack, Reginald, the wealthy kid in search of friends, or Logan, the…"

"Excuse me, Mr. McLean," Zane states between heavy breaths. Chris turns toward Zane with a raised eyebrow. "We attempted to contact Logan, but he apparently lives so far off of the grid that our team was unable to locate him."

Chris blinks. He turns back toward the camera. Yancy and Reginald’s images from their first appearance on the show appear on the screen. "Make that two whole options. Yancy or Reginald? Who will it be? Only you can decide. More on how to vote for your choice is coming soon. Have a good night, and be sure to tune in next time to Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst to see who you voted to return."

**Voting now closed.**

### Chapter 6 - Keepin’ It Relay

Chris McLean faces the camera with his signature smile. He introduces, "Welcome to an all new episode of Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst!" He gets more somber in his expression. "Last time, after a shocking physical altercation involving LeVar and Cary, LeVar was disqualified from the competition. In spite of that, The Black Swans lost the challenge. They decided to vote off Yuko, who was observed as not fulfilling her objective as an… objective observer. How will events from the previous episode effect the players? We also held a special vote to decide a new returning player. Between Yancy and Reginald, who did the public vote back into the game? Stay tuned to find out."

Hae Won, Grace, and Patsy stand together, outside of the challenge game show studio. Hae Won has a hand on Grace’s shoulder. She assures, "Hey, girl. I am here for you. I know you liked LeVar, for some reason, but it’s better that you found out his dark side, now, instead of later."

Patsy holds a hand to her chin. She states, "This turn of events still holds a lot of unanswered questions."

Hae Won raises an eyebrow. She asks, "Like what?" She gestures with her hand flat. "We saw the video footage. There was even a witness. It’s an open and shut case. We may not like what happened, but we can’t change the facts."

"I’m keeping a open mind. Everyone is innocent until proven guilty." Patsy states as she looks on at the locked set. "If only we could investigate the crime scene. I’m sure there’s got to be some clues." She nonchalantly adds, "Grace said she didn’t think he did it. She’s with me on this."

"You did?" Hae Won asks, now with both eyebrows raised.

Grace clarifies, "Well… I said I don’t want to believe he did it."

"That’s good enough for me," Patsy adds. "Let’s try to see if we can break in here." Patsy digs into her vintage handbag. "I swear I brought my skeleton key with me."

Hae Won rolls her eyes. "Let’s get out of here, Grace." She begins walking away.

Grace avoids looking at Patsy. "Sorry, Pats…" She follows after Hae Won.

Patsy continues to dig through her bag. She finds a jewel encrusted dagger. "How did that get in here?" She tosses the dagger without looking behind her. An intern can be heard shouting, ‘Ow!’ Patsy doesn’t seem to notice, as she continues looking through her handbag.

In the medical tent, Cary opens his eyes. He blinks a few times before looking over to see Dirk sitting in a chair writing in a notebook. Cary smiles. He says, "Hi, Dirk."

Dirk looks over at Cary with a smile. He then winces when he sees Cary. "Uh. Hey… guy."

"Thanks for visiting me," Cary states. "I’m really sorry to worry you, though. I’m feeling totally fine."

"For visiting you?" Dirk repeats. Dirk thinks for a moment. He lights up. "Oh, yeah!" He lifts a bag on the side of his chair. "Nurse Bigby requested I bring your things, so you have something besides that frilly dress to wear." Dirk tosses the mauve bag at Cary, who catches it on top of his bedsheets.

"Nurse… Bigby?" Cary states.

"Yeah," Dirk answers. "He’s really nice, strapping, and could probably break a walnut with his thighs. My kind of guy."

Cary asks, "You were writing something earlier… Do you mind telling me what it was?"

"That?" Dirk asks, with a few extra blinks. "Yeah… it was actually about that cruel prank that LeVar played on you earlier. The one with the syrup?"

Cary assures, "Try not to hold that against him. I know he’s not a bad guy deep down, and I totally des…"

Dirk holds up the paper, revealing a stick figure drawing in a dress getting syrup poured on it. Dirk explains, "The guys are gonna loving pulling this one on me when we get back together." Dirk chuckles. "It was awesome! Dude is my hero."

Cary grimaces as he forces a laugh. "Yeah. It sure was awesome… Dirk… Uh… Are you sure your frat bros…"

Nurse Bigby ducks his head as he steps under the doorway. He introduces himself, as Dirk excitedly stands up, "Hey, Cary. My name is Nurse Bigby." The male nurse reads off of his clipboard. "You are cleared to head back to your cabin. You have no major injuries. Just an unsightly black eye that should heal up in the next week or so."

"Black eye?" Cary repeats.

Nurse Bigby nods. He hands Cary a mirror. "Dirk and I will step out into the hall to talk and to give you a little privacy, so you can get dressed." Nurse Bigby steps outside. He puts a hand on Dirk’s shoulder and they walk out together, as Dirk looks at Nurse Bigby’s hand with wide eyes. Cary looks after them with a smile. He then holds up the mirror. His eyes get wide at seeing himself, as he gasps. He puts a hand over his black eye, and winces.

"So," Dirk states, outside of Cary’s room. "You said you wanted to… talk? Is it something you need me to get for Cary, or…"

Nurse Bigby’s rosy cheeks look slightly more red. He admits, "Hey, Dirk… I’m not sure how to ask this, but…" He clears his throat. He places a hand on the back of his head. Dirk looks with wide eyes at his bulging bicep. "I admit… There was a reason I selected you to bring me Cary’s belongings… I know a vending machine near the break room that isn’t half bad… I thought maybe… you would like to join me for a bag of chips, some time? Thing is, sometime the machine drops a second bag by mistake… And it would be a shame if I didn’t have someone to share them with."

"Me?" Dirk repeats with wide eyes. "I mean… Yeah. I’ll be all over you…" Both guys eyes widen. "I mean, that… I’ll be all over that." Dirk attempts to look casual. "I have a sock full of quarters back at the cabin I could bring…" He points behind him.

"No, no," Nurse Bigby replies. He looks slightly flustered. "It’ll be my treat." He tugs his shirt down over his slightly exposed midriff. "So… uh… This time, tomorrow?" Dirk nods rapidly. Nurse Bigby smiles. "I’ll see you then." Nurse Bigby steps away. Dirk looks after him as he walks away, with an awkward smile.

"Howdy!" A voice says, seemingly out of nowhere.

Dirk jumps. He looks over at Luke, who just joined him. Dirk asks, "Luke. What are you doing here?"

"Gosh, I come here every day on account of my medication," Luke explains.

Dirk blinks and says, "Oh. Are you sick? Or is it like those Jetstone vitamins?"

Luke laughs. He says, "Golly. You didn’t read my bio the last time, huh?" Dirk shakes his head. Luke explains, "I’m HIV positive." Dirk raises his eyebrows. "It’s mighty considerate for the staff to provide my daily meds. Medicine sure has come a doggone long way, even in just a couple years."

Dirk states, "No, I didn’t know that about you."

"Yeah, we’ll have to sit down and chat some time. You can tell me more about your frat bros…" Luke says.

Dirks nods. He assures, "You would love them."

Luke gestures with a nod behind himself and adds, "I thought I might as well stop in and say howdy-do to that Cary feller while I’m here." Luke walks through the entry to Cary’s room. Cary shrieks. Luke steps out rubbing the back of his head.

Dirk explains a little late, "Oh, yeah. He’s getting dressed."

Luke nods. He admits, "Golly… Well, his being embarrassed to shower with the other guys makes a little more sense..." Dirk and Luke blink for a few moments. "I… uh… better find that nice looking male nurse with the big ears. Nice chatting with you." Luke steps away.

"He had ears?" Dirk asks to himself, with a confused expression.

Cary, dressed in a pair of pants, looks through his bag. He stares a moment before pulling a note from his things. He reads, "I know it isn’t much, but I wanted to give this to you as a start of an apology. Sincerely, Herman." Cary lifts up an orange tank top with a red star on it. Cary smiles slightly.

In The Black Swans’ cabin, Grace enters. Blair looks up and smiles. She says, "Oh, hey, Grace! Where have you been? Where’s Patsy? Where’s Hae Won?"

Grace recounts, "Hae Won wanted to stop at the confessional. Patsy was at the challenge venue. She seems to think some foul play was involved with the incident earlier."

"Yeah," Zoe responds, mid crunch. "We all saw what happened."

Grace explains, "Well, Patsy seems to think he was framed."

"Wow," Ruth states. "I thought I was an abstract thinker."

"He was just lucky that the cheap set fell apart when it did," Zoe adds.

Tamira looks back for a moment before returning to her skin care routine in front of a vanity. She lets out a ‘hm’. Grace looks in her direction.

Grace sits on her bunk near the vanity. She asks Tamira, "What was that ‘hm’ about?"

"Oh, that?" Tamira asks. "You can ignore that."

Grace continues, with a raised eyebrow, "It was after Zoe mentioned the set falling apart."

Tamira shakes her head. She corrects, "She used the words ‘cheap set’. That’s why I let out the ‘hm’."

"What about it?" Grace asks. "You know Chris is the first to skimp on expenses."

"That’s what I thought," Tamira begins, "at first." She tweezes a stray eyebrow hair while looking in the mirror. "But when you think about the prize money, and… Did you realize those gemstones from the treasure challenge were genuine?"

"They were?" Grace asks, her eyes wide.

Tamira lets out a slight snobbish laugh. "Of course you didn’t." Grace glares at her. "Not only that, but the interns this season don’t look like they were scraped out of a ditch. In addition, as hideous as the clothes we wore for that last challenge were, they were high quality, vintage, designer labels. It appears that Chris has an almost limitless budget this season."

Grace puts her fist to her chin. "So that would mean…" Her eyes widen. "I’m going to go back to help Patsy investigate."

Tamira stands. She sets down her powder puff. She says, "I suppose I have no choice but to join you. Let me grab my compact."

Grace states, "Don’t strain yourself."

"You apparently need my eye for detail," Tamira adds.

Grace frowns. She rolls her eyes and says, "Come on."

Evan, Herman, and Jerome sit alone in their shared cabin. "Where is everyone?" Evan asks.

Jerome responds, "Out galavanting in the night. I’m sure after the stressful events from earlier, they want to unload some steam…" Jerome sighs. "I wish I had some steam to exfoliate my pores." He tugs at the skin on his face.

Evan looks at Herman. He asks, "How are you holding up, buddy?" Herman looks down. He walks over to his bed, and gets under the covers.

Jerome assures, "He needs his space, right now… He and LeVar were pretty close."

Evan nods. He adds, "I know this is kind of an awkward time to ask this, but… maybe I shouldn’t."

"Shoot, boo," Jerome encourages.

Evan scratches the back of his head. "It was about our alliance. I know LeVar was a big part of that, but do we still want to work together?"

Jerome admits, "I don’t know. I’m worried that all that alliance stuff might trigger Hermie-poo. Maybe we should just let the chips fall where they may."

"Hey," Evan responds. "I totally understand. I won’t bring it up, again."

Jerome smiles and says, "Thanks, boo. I think that would be for the best."

Tamira, Grace, and Patsy stand outside of the challenge venue. Patsy states with a smirk, "I knew you’d be back."

"There’s no way you could know that," Grace assures.

Patsy holds up a little container. She explains, "You left your eye shadow."

Grace blinks. She snatches her makeup back and places it in her coat pocket. "So… uh. Did you find a way back into the game show set?"

Patsy shakes her head. "I couldn’t find my skeleton key." She taps her forehead. "I’m trying to remember if I even brought it."

"Are you trying to get past that lock?" Tamira asks as she looks back at the door.

Grace states, "Just a second. The big girls are talking." Grace turns her attention toward Patsy. "Is there any other way to get in there, like a window, or something?"

Patsy thinks, as she looks to the side. "In my novel, The Enigmatic Candle Locksmith, in a shocking twist, the killer used candle wax in order to make a copy of a key in order to pull off the perfect locked room mystery. But that would take some time..."

Grace blinks. "Is it that much of a twist if it’s stated in the title?"

Patsy ignores her. She suggests, "Another way we could get in there would be to use the subtle method stunningly revealed in my bestselling novel The Mysterious Case of the Battering Ram Smashing Into a Door to Gain Access to a Locked Room."

"Let me guess," Grace states with a smirk, "They got into the room using a battering ram?"

Patsy shakes her head with a smile. She replies, "Shows what you know. You fell for the classic misdirect. They actually used a credit card." Grace blinks. "Do you have one on you?" Grace shakes her head. "I guess we’ll just need to look for clues out here."

Grace points a flashlight at a bush. She holds up some leaves and asks, "What about this? Is this something?" Tamira opens up her compact and wanders off.

"It’s a start," Patsy assures.

Tamira calls out. "Hey! I got the door open. It was easy."

Grace and Patsy turn in her direction. "How?!"

Tamira explains, "If you watched my channel, Bougie on a Budget, you would know that no self respecting man or woman, in this day and age, would leave home without one of these babies." She holds up a bobby pin and kisses it.

"Let’s go check it out," Patsy states to Grace. They rush inside together, as they push past Tamira.

"A simple thank you would be appreciated," Tamira assures, with an eye roll. She follows after the other two women.

Inside, Grace and Patsy search the area where the sign almost hit Quimberly. Patsy has her magnifying glass out as she investigates. Grace asks, "If what Tamira said is true, and the sign didn’t fall due to neglect, who would have any incentive to target Quimberly?”

"Besides eliminating the stiffest competition?" Tamira asks. She looks at her fingernails, as the other two look at her with wide eyes. "Don’t act like you two never considered it." She pulls out a nail file.

Patsy replies, "It didn’t seem like whoever might have tampered with the sign would be able to control who it fell on. It must have been chance that Quimberly was in the wrong place at the wrong time."

Grace asks, "Who could possibly want a distraction when…" She gulps. Grace and Patsy then walk over to where LeVar hit Cary. Grace looks around the toppled seat that Cary was sitting on. Patsy examines the podium.

Patsy calls out, "I found something, but it’s stuck to the podium." She sighs. "If only I had some sort of dagger…"

"Here," Tamira responds. She hands Patsy a nail file. "Again, if you watched my videos, you would know…" Patsy hugs a bewildered looking Tamira.

"You’re a genius!" Patsy exclaims as she begins to saw the clue from the podium.

Tamira whispers to Grace, "Tbh, I only noticed how tragic her cuticles were looking." Tamira and Grace look on as Patsy continues to cut at the podium.

Patsy holds up a piece of fabric. She exclaims, "I found a clue!"

Grace scratches her head. "What is it?”

Patsy looks at it, and then back at her team members. She states, "I have no idea. I mean, obviously it’s a piece of cloth."

Tamira rolls her eyes. She explains, "You two have to have noticed that it’s a piece of the tacky shirt that LeVar was wearing." Grace and Patsy look at each other. "You’re telling me you didn’t noticed he had torn his sleeve? It was totes obvious."

Grace admits, "I noticed that he was holding his arm, but I don’t remember his sleeve…"

"I guess it’s not as big a clue as I thought it was," Patsy states. ”Let’s look for more clues." Patsy begins to return to the area.

Tamira shakes her head and holds up her hand. She continues, "I can tell from here that that is a high quality piece of fabric. It didn’t tear because of its poor quality, or whatever. I mean you took, like, twelve minutes to cut it free from the podium."

"I guess that’s true," Patsy admits. "What do you suggest?"

Grace suggests, "Maybe it was stuck on some syrup from that prank he pulled on Cary."

Tamira shakes her head. She explains, "It can’t be anything like that. That would be far easier to cut loose, and junk. That fabric was stuck in place by something like the heavy duty glue I use to reattach the heels on my stilettos when they break…" Tamira clears her throat. "Not that I’ve worn inexpensive footwear in some time, mind you."

Grace has a hand to her chin. She admits, "This is all conjecture… but what if LeVar was trying to run to help Quimberly, like any typical guy would, and his sleeve got caught by the glue. When it tore free, that’s when his hand got loose and the force of trying to get it free is why he hit Cary."

"Nobody would believe that," Patsy admits, "but I suppose it could happen."

"If it was glue," Grace begins, "somebody put it there on purpose. But why would they do that? They couldn’t have honestly thought that something like what I said would actually happen. Or who it would effect..."

Tamira shrugs. She suggests, "Maybe they, like, didn’t want someone to raise that paddle for the challenge." Patsy and Grace raise their eyebrows.

"Speaking of which… Have either of you noticed strange things about the prior challenges?" Patsy asks. "Like the holes being cut in certain people’s bags for the treasure seeking challenge?"

"Or those notes with additional challenge requirements that fell out of the garment bags containing those hideous, but well made, costumes that Esme didn’t seem to know anything about during the first challenge?" Tamira adds.

"It appears we have a good old fashioned saboteur on our hands," Patsy concludes. Tamira and Grace look at each other with wide eyes, and then at Patsy.

"Dang. I thought an inner saboteur was bad enough…" Grace asks, "But who would want to target LeVar?"

Patsy sighs. "You’re right. That doesn’t narrow down the suspects, at all." Grace frowns as she looks  at Patsy.

The next morning, in the mess hall, Grace, Patsy, and Tamira lean back in their seats in order to keep an eye on the other contestants. Tamira whispers, "This is so fab. We are, like, totally spies, right now."

"Shh…" Grace shushes. "We don’t want to draw suspicion."

Cary walks into the mess hall with a hand on the back of his head, wearing the shirt gifted from Herman. Herman looks over at him, and smiles slightly, before returning to his slop. Cary addresses the others, "Uh… Hi, everyone. Don’t mind me. Sorry, I got kind of a late start. Don’t stop eating on my account."

Tamira waves and says, "You can come sit with…" Patsy nudges her in the side. "Oof! What was that for? I was going to offer him some concealer for that awful black eye."

Patsy whispers, "Cary is suspect numero uno. It’s almost always the most obvious suspect."

"I don’t play card games, and besides Cary was stuck on that stool," Tamira reminds. Cary goes to sit at an empty table.

"At least, that’s what he wanted us to think," Patsy states in a hushed tone, as her eyes follow Cary. Grace nods, while Tamira lowers her sunglasses to give a baffled look to Patsy.

Tamira adds, "And another thing. Why would Cary, like, want to sabotage someone from his own…"

"Hush up," Grace states. "Esme is here."

Esme walks in, followed by Zane holding a monitor. Esme announces, "Hi, everyone! I hope you’re enjoying your meal."

"Is that what this is?" Jerome asks. "Child… I thought it was cat sick." He holds up his spoon as the slop slowly flows back onto the tray.

Esme says, "Ahem. I know we were all surprised by yesterday’s events. But due to a clause in the contract…"

"The one stating that any disqualified contestant needs a replacement due to not interfering with the show’s schedule?" Grace asks. The other contestants look at her with various confused looks. She responds, "Am I seriously the only one that read it?"

Esme nods. "That’s the one."

Dirk throws his head back. He whines, "Is anyone going to actually get eliminated on this stupid show?"

Esme laughs anxiously. "Mr. McLean held a special poll for the fans to vote a contestant from a previous season back on the show. The choices were Total Drama Tropics’ Yancy, and Total Drama: Boney Island’s Reginald." The images of Yancy and Reginald appear back on the screen.

Dirk leans forward slightly just enough to look at the screen. He throws his head back, again, and laments, "And two more skinny guys, no less."

"I have no idea who those guys are," Evan says with a blank stare.

Brent blinks. He asks, "Didn’t Yancy make the final two on his season?"

"Excuse me, ja? How could the fan peoples vote someone back in?" Anders asks. "The show isn’t live now, ja?"

"Good point," Skylar says with a nod.

Esme explains, "The poll was put on social media, without any of the details on why the contestant would need to return. They just thought they were completing the cast."

Blair points to the screen and leans toward Jerome and asks from the side of her mouth, "Did Reginald always look like that?"

Jerome replies, "Girl, you know they have that new HD technology these days." Blair nods in realization, though she still looks confused.

Esme announces, "I would like to introduce you to your new competitor…" A tall, slim Asian man enters the room. He wears a purple sweater tied around his shoulders, as well as a lavender polo shirt, and white shorts. "It’s Reginald! Isn’t that exciting?" She gestures toward a startled Reginald as she hits him in the abdomen with her clipboard.

"Welcome aboard!" Cary shouts, with his hand cupped around his mouth.

"We’re not on a ship, ja?" Anders asks.

Reginald blinks. He looks over at Esme and states, "I thought this was an All-Star season."

Esme forces a smile, and nods. She assures, "It is… But most of the big names have already appeared."

Reginald shrugs. "I suppose that explains why you invited m…" Reginald clears his throat. "Excuse me." He addresses the other contestants with a bow. "I’m sure this is awkward, not just for me, as you all have had an opportunity to get to know each other."

Dirk shouts, "Don’t worry, dude! I don’t know half of these people’s names."

Reginald assures, "My last appearance on this program, my goal was to make a few friends. While my success at that goal was dubious, at best, I’m hoping to have a second chance." The others clap.

Tamira leans toward Grace and whispers, as her eyes tilt up and down, "He looks like a literal million dollars… give or take a few…"

Grace says, "Yeah. He was a rich kid on my season, I think."

Tamira nods. "I can see that."

Patsy leans in toward Tamira and Patsy. She whispers, "Meet me back at our home base in about five minutes." Patsy walks off, as the other two women look at each other with raised eyebrows.

In confessional, Reginald looks at the outhouse setting. "This brings back so many memories…" He pauses. "Bad ones…" Reginald turns to the camera. He puts his hands together, and makes his eyes sparkle, somehow. "’My goal was to make friends’… ‘I’m hoping to have a second chance.’" Reginald puts his hands down and rolls his eyes. "That was my mistake the first time. I’m here to show Daddy that I can earn a few million on my own, and to keep the victory out of the hands of somebody else. With the glazed expressions I saw in the cafeteria, this should be a piece of crème brûlée." Reginald kisses his fingertips and then gestures his hand backward.

Back at the mess hall, Evan passes a piece of dry toast to Hae Won. She asks, "You sure you don’t want this?"

Evan insists, "Nah. I don’t have much of an appetite."

"That explains why you’re wafer thin," Hae Won replies as she takes a bite of the toast.

Evan begins, "I believe the expression is…"

Patsy walks up with a plastic bin, her hair in a hairnet, and rubber gloves. She explains, "Chef is gone for the day, so I volunteered as busperson."

"The bus has a route way out here?" Evan asks with a smirk. Hae Won laughs, he looks over at her, the smirk still plastered on his face.

Patsy holds up a finger and explains, "No, no. I am bussing the tables. In laymen terms, it means I’m cleaning up after you heathens."

"I know what it means," Evan states with an eye roll. "Unlike you and sarcasm." Hae laughs, again.

Patsy goes on, "If you would prefer to clean up after yourself…"

Evan hands over his and Hae Won’s dishes, and drops them in Patsy’s bin. "Not at all. Have at them."

"Thank you, ever so kindly," Patsy walks away with a big grin on her face.

Evan looks after Patsy as she walks into the kitchen. "What a weirdo."

Hae Won adds, "She’s not that bad once you get past the eccentricities, total lack of spacial awareness, and the fashion choices."

Evan laughs. He states, "That leaves a lot." Evan clears his throat. "Hey, I was kind of wondering if you were interested in, maybe…"

Zane can be heard over the outdoor loudspeaker. He announces, "It’s time for your next challenge. Please meet Esme outside."

Hae Won states to Evan, "Hold that thought." She and the others stand up from the table.

Evan looks slightly embarrassed. He replies, "Yeah, sure thing."

In The Black Swan’s cabin, Grace holds the door open for Patsy and asks, "Patsy, what is with the sudden interest in cleaning up after everyone? And why are we here?"

"I could use a hand," Patsy requests, as she struggles to carry the bin full of dirty dishes.

Grace holds up a finger and states, "That is not my job."

"I’m going to drop it," Patsy insists, as she looks unsteady.

Grace looks over at Tamira. Tamira looks at her fingernails and responds, "Don’t look at me." Grace sighs, as she reluctantly helps Patsy set the heavy bin down on Patsy’s mattress.

"Be careful not to touch anything besides the bin," Patsy instructs.

Tamira asks, "What is this all about?"

Patsy holds up a glass with her rubber glove. Patsy responds, "All in due time."

Over the loudspeaker outside, Zane can be heard announcing, "It’s time for your next challenge. Please meet Esme outside."

Patsy sighs. "Darn… I guess this will have to wait." She moves the dirty dishes to the floor with a thud and multiple clangs, and slides them under her bed.

Grace looks down and states, "That has got to be a health code violation."

The contestants are gathered in front of Esme and a colorful set full of very strange props. The contestants turn their attention to the assistant host as she explains, "Today we have an obstacle course relay race prepared for you."

"So just the dunk tank challenge rehashed?" Hae Won asks with a raised eyebrow.

Esme assures, "This one is totally different." She wipes a drop of sweat off of her forehead. "I would explain it, but we’ve assigned each of you a portion of the course and will give you written instructions on your challenge portion. The goal is to complete your task and find a flag the same color as your team color, black for the women, and purple for the guys. When you retrieve it, pass the flag on to your next team mate. The first team to collect all eight flags with their final contestant making it to the mat will win the challenge."

Evan smiles and commends, "You recited that all from memory? Very impressive." Esme blushes, as Hae Won looks over at Evan for a moment with a smirk.

Esme clears her throat. "Any questions before you assign roles?"

Skylar raises his hand. Esme turns toward him. He points down and asks, "Am I expected to compete in my three piece suit?"

Esme assures. "Feel free to take it off." Skylar shrugs and begins disrobing. Esme blushes, again, and clarifies, "There are changing rooms set up. And each of you has been provided with a duffel bag with a t-shirt, a pair of gym shorts, and a bicycle helmet." Skylar nods and buttons up his shirt. Esme continues, "Go ahead and assign roles. The men need to sit out so they have eight team members to match The Black Swans."

The guys huddle together. Reginald asks. He places a hand on his chest. "I would be honored to compete, given that I’m new to the team, and would like an opportunity to prove my worth."

Dirk assures, "Very cool, Ol’ Reggie." Reginald winces.

Skylar offers, "I can always sit out, so everyone else has a chance to compete."

Luke grabs Skylar by the shoulder, and insists, "You must be jokin’, pal." Luke turns to Reginald. "Skylar here is right perfect for any challenge, I reckon. Reggie, you should have seen him swing into action to help Quimberly…" Luke thinks. "I guess only Quimberly saw, but I’m sure it was a sight to behold."

Anders nods and adds, "I wish I had half the courage as him, ja? Anders once was forced to hide in dumpster to escape rabid squirrel."

Skylar blushes slightly and insists, "Anybody would have helped if they could. I was just in the right place at the right time."

Evan smirks. He quietly teases Skylar, "You and Quimberly, huh? You certainly have high standards."

Skylar shakes his head and whispers back to his friend, "No, it’s nothing like that. The bearded lady and I have recently hooked back up." Skylar looks coy as he leans in closer. "I’m thinking of asking her if she wants to share a trailer."

Evan’s eyes are wide. "That’s radical, bro. I’m sure you’ll be hairy…" Skylar raises an eyebrow. Evan clears his throat. "I mean, ‘very’ happy together."

"Hey," Skylar states. He whispers. "Do you think it’d be a good idea for you to sit out of the challenge, today? It looks like it might be pretty physical."

Evan responds, "I appreciate you looking out for me, and all, but I don’t want the others to think I’m weak, or anything."

Skylar nods. "Hey, if you think you can handle it… I’ll back you one hundered percent. I’m sure there’s an open slot in the nose picking portion." Evan blinks, as he looks over at a giant nose on the set.

After everyone are in their challenge clothes, Esme announces, "The guys chose to sit out Herman and Jerome."

"C’mon, Jerome," Dirk states. "You’d be great in this challenge."

Jerome scoffs. He assures, "I’ve got a bad feeling about this one, boo. Like, why do we need helmets? I’ll be perfectly safe on the bench, thank you." Dirk scratches his head, and shrugs.

Evan and Skylar stand next to each other. Evan’s costume is particularly baggy, he holds up his shorts with one of his hands. He looks over at Skylar whose t-shirt and shorts are tighter, the shirt not completely covering his hairy torso. Skylar does not seem alarmed. Evan turns to Esme and asks, "Are we sure the crew knows our sizes?"

"Ja," Anders assures. "Esme took my measurements herself. I thought she did this for everyone, ja?" He receives several blank stares.

Esme coughs and continues, "Let’s move right along. When you get to your portion of the challenge, as numbered on the envelopes that were with your bags, open it and read the instructions." Zane walks up in a plaid jacket and holding a microphone. Esme explains, "Zane will follow along with live commentary for the audience at home. Everyone can get in position." After the campers get into their positions, Esme calls out, "Go!"

Zane stands next to Cary and Quimberly’s obstacles, long strips of plastic with whipped cream smeared on top of them. Zane commentates, "Cary and Quimberly read their notes. Quimberly pulls ahead and runs forward, dives down, and slides down the whipped cream path, with Cary looking flustered at how quickly she read the note! He drops it and slides down the mat behind her. Quimberly quickly found her flag at the end of the whipped cream obstacle. She’s already passing it on to Grace."

Grace reads her note. She looks over at the large nose prop and says, "You’ve got to be kidding…"

Zane continues, "Grace has dropped down in front of the giant schnoz."

"It’s almost as big as yours," Grace quips.

Zane clears his throat. He continues his commentary, "Grace reaches inside the right nostril in an attempt to find her teams flag, but Cary has passed the first flag on to Luke. Luke has now got his hand up his team’s nose, while Grace appears to be grossed out."

Grace pulls out her hand and shakes some green slime off of it. She states, "This is disgusting."

"You reckon?" Luke asks. "This brings me right back home. Just like artificially inseminating a cow. Reminds me of the cycle of life… Brings a right tear to my eye."

Grace gags. "Please… don’t say anymore…"

Zane recounts, "Grace plunges her slime covered hand into the left nostril this time. Luke is pulling his hand out, and… He’s got the flag for his team!" Luke stands, and slips a little on the slime covered plastic beneath the nose. "He passes the slime covered flag on to his teammate, Anders." Tamira stands next to Anders, as she awaits her team’s flag. Anders reads his instructions. He has a clear plastic cup strapped to his helmet with a purple line around it. Zane announces, "Anders is standing under a large pipe, and he is pulling a chain." Slime sprays out of the pipe above Anders.

Tamira looks on with wide eyes. She says, "I forfeit. I’ll take the L."

Zane commentates, "Grace has found the flag for The Black Swans and runs over to Tamira and is… holding out the flag for Tamira…"

Tamira holds up her hands. "I am not touching that."

"You have to," Grace states. "If I can stick my hand up that nasty nose, you can do your section."

"No way!" Tamira responds.

Zane looks on in disbelief. He announces, "Grace is now chasing Tamira in circles, as Tamira refuses to    take the flag from Grace. Meanwhile, Anders is almost done with filling his cup with the green slime."

Anders states, "For once, Anders freakish stature comes in handy as less distance is required of slime to reach cup."

Grace yells to Tamira, "How do you expect to win the prize money, if you won’t compete in the challenge?"

Tamira thinks. She sighs. She stops running. "You’re right." Grace’s eyes widen as she slips on slime and slides toward Tamira.

Zane announces, "Tamira has finally stopped running. Tamira snatches the flag as Grace slides by with two fingers and her nose pointed in the air." Zane looks on with his large eyebrows raised as Grace keeps sliding. Off screen, Grace can be heard crashing, and a cat screeches. He turns his attention back to Tamira. "Tamira is now placing her helmet back on her head. It appears to be taking all her power." He looks up at Anders. "Anders’ cup is filled with slime, so he is good to grab the flag hanging at the end of the mat."

Anders nods, causing slime to spill out of his cup. Jerome smirks and says to Herman, "My instinct was right. This is not my challenge." Jerome is hit directly in the face by the slime from Anders’ cup. Herman looks at Jerome with wide eyes, he opens his mouth to speak. Jerome says, "I don’t want a word out of you." Herman nods rapidly.

Zane states, "Anders has to go back because he didn’t grab his flag while the cup was still full! This is a huge break for Tamira!" Anders runs back to his pipe and chain, slipping a little on his way. "Both competitors are giving it their all by standing in place!" The cups seem about even in how full they are. "Both contestants have their cups full, they can make their way to the flag for their teammates!" Tamira and Anders pass their flags on to their team members.

Brent and Zoe are shown running in a giant hamster wheel. Zane states, "Zoe is finished." He looks down at a stopwatch. "Great time!" He looks over at Brent. "And Brent is now finished!" He looks down at the stop watch. "He… hit the average time by the millisecond. Now let’s turn to Quimberly who will hopefully grace us with some words of wisdom." He points the microphone toward Quimberly.

Quimberly looks generally disinterested. She comments, "Looks like rain."

Zane looks up at the clear skies, then back down, and pulls the microphone back toward himself. He says, "Uh-huh…" Zane turns to the next portion of the challenge.

Dirk and Hae Won ride tiny tricycles. Dirk looks very serious as he leans forward to pedal the tiny tricycle forward. Evan points and laughs at Dirk. Evan wipes a tear from his eye. He says to Patsy, "He looks so dumb, right now!"

Zane announces, "Dirk has busted through the foam brick wall first, but Hae Won is close behind!"

Evan and Patsy are now shown as they climb across a pair of monkey bar sets. Zane announces, "Evan swings across with a slight lead. His ill fitting shorts fall down around his ankles, and he looks down at his pink and purple boxer briefs and then back up. Oh! He looks embarrassed!" Dirk points and laughs, as most of the other laugh. "But he continues to climb across the monkey bars! Patsy has slipped off! She will need to start over."

Evan finishes his task and passes on his team’s flag to Skylar. Skylar tucks the flag into his shorts. Evan keeps a hand on his shorts and says, "That was not the cool guy impression I was hoping to leave."

Skylar laughs. He assures, "Are you kidding? No dude is bro enough to wear pink undies and make them look as cool as you do."

Evan looks down slightly. He looks back up, laughs, and says, "Thanks, bro. I guess way more embarrassing stuff has leaked of me on the interwebs."

Skylar laughs. "I can neither confirm nor deny that I’ve seen those…" He looks to the side.

Evan laughs. He looks down at Skylar’s exposed midsection. "Maybe they would have gotten more views if I had your v cut abs." Skylar looks down and laughs. "Good luck, my man."

Skylar looks up at the giant gum ball machine for his portion of the challenge. "I have a feeling this will be a piece of… gum," Skylar assures.

Zane announces, "Skylar has read his message. He climbs up a rope to the platform above the gum ball machine."

Skylar tosses the envelope aside. He looks down as another scrap of paper falls from the envelope. He raises an eyebrow and bends down to pick it up. Skylar looks at the piece of paper with a raised eyebrow. He reads the note to himself. He blinks. Skylar looks down at the giant gum ball machine that serves as a glorified ball pit. He tilts his head forward as he continues to stare at the ball put and he then wipes his forehead with his forearm.

Zane announces, "It appears that Skylar is hesitating." Zane looks at Blair, who has received her flag from Patsy, read her instructions, and is now climbing the rope. Zane comments, "Blair is catching up, and Skylar is now losing the lead his team has held! What is he doing up there?" Evan and Quimberly look up at Skylar with concerned expressions.

Skylar begins to breathe heavily, as he clutches his chest. Blair reaches her platform and braces herself to jump into her team’s ball pit. She looks over at Skylar. She says, "Ohmygosh! Are you okay, Skylar? You look as white as a sheet."

Skylar continues to breathe deeply. He attempts to explain, "I… I don’t know what’s h-happening. I looked down at the ball pit and I started having f-flashbacks to when I f-fell on my season…"

Zane announces, "Blair has also stopped at the top of the platform. What is happening up there?"

Blair asks, "Are you okay? Do you want me to go get help?"

Skylar assures, "G-go ahead, Blair. I-I appreciate your concern, but… I’ll be f-fine."

"If you’re sure," Blair states, still with concern in her voice. Skylar forces a smile and nods. Blair takes a deep breath before she jumps into her gum ball machine.

Zane announces, "Blair has surpassed Skylar, still frozen at the top of the gum ball machine! She now needs to find a flag among the gum balls before sliding down the chute."

Evan turns to Zane. He asserts, "I think we need to help Skylar." Quimberly nods.

Zane speaks into his microphone, "Skylar? Do you want the crew to come help you down?"

Skylar insists, "N-no. No, I’m f-fine. I just need to calm down." Skylar attempts to regulate his breathing, as he props himself up on the railing on the platform.

Esme steps over to Zane, and they both look at Skylar with concern. Zane turns his attention to Blair. "Blair has exited the gum ball machine and has passed her flag on to Ruth. Ruth has read her instructions, and is diving into the giant whipped cream pie, brought to you by Mr. Whipped’s brand whipped cream. Yes, Mr. Whipped’s whipped cream. When you think whipped, think…" Esme nudges Zane hard in the side with her elbow. Zane winces.

"Now is not the time," Esme assures. Zane nods. Zane motions for the crew.

Ruth surfaces from the whipped cream and states, "This is giving me a great idea for some performance art." She dives back down.

Zane explains through his microphone, "Skylar. Our team is bringing a ladder."

Skylar assures, "I’m o-okay. I d-don’t want to let my team down." He continues to breathe deeply.

Cary, with tears streaming down his face, takes the microphone from Zane and assures, "You aren’t letting anyone down."

Zane wrestles the microphone away from Cary. He explains, "Your safety is our chief concern. It’s all of our concern." The other contestants nod. Zane looks over at Ruth, holding the final flag in her teeth and standing on the final mat. "Besides… The Black Swans have won the challenge." Zoe raises her arms in the air and cheers, before looking over at the somber expression of the others and slowly lowering them.

"They have?" Skylar states in disbelief. He looks over at Ruth and holds his head down.

After climbing down from the platform, Evan wraps his arms around a disappointed looking Skylar. Skylar states, "I don’t know what came over me… Maybe a case of Pit TSD. I just went right back to three years ago."

Evan assures, "I’m sorry, man." Luke and Quimberly place a hand on each of Skylar’s shoulders.

Esme announces, as she marks something on her clipboard, "Right. I’m sorry you got triggered, Skylar."

"You couldn’t have known," Skylar insists. "I didn’t know, either. I’ve never had this happen. I’m feeling alright now, though, besides letting my team down."

"You didn’t let us down," Cary assures. His team members nod in agreement. Cary wipes a tear from his face with his forearm.

Esme explains, "Unfortunately, The Raging Bulls will need to meet with Chris at the campfire ceremony, where one of you will be voted off the island."

On the walk back to their cabin, Herman, Jerome, Anders, Dirk, and Reginald step off of the trail to talk. Jerome assures Reginald, "It’s nice to have another Boney Islander among us, boo."

Dirk laughs to himself and repeats, "’Boney’." Jerome gives Dirk a side eye glance.

Reginald arches an eyebrow. He responds, "Agreed, my dear… acquaintance. I hope it won’t be me, tonight. I’d rather not get revolving doored."

"You nary have a thing to worry about," Herman assures.

Anders asks, "May Anders ask who we want to vote for?"

The guys stay quiet. Dirk frowns. "I guess I have to be the one to say it. I say we vote Skylar. Dude is a total pansy."

Jerome responds with a furrowed brow, "I don’t like that word, boo."

"What?" Dirk replies. "It’s true. Who’s to say he won’t flake on us next time? Or at the very least hurt his ankle, again."

"He hurt his ankle?" Reginald asks. The others nod. Reginald picks a piece of lint off of his sweater before flicking it off. "I would have never guessed from what I’ve seen."

Herman responds, "I doth protest. I was sort of a scalawag to him previously. Besides, he showed his courage by saving Quimberly."

Dirk blinks. "Is that supposed to be a positive?"

Herman goes on, "I shan’t be able to cast my ballot against him for panicking. I sympathize with him."

Dirk has his arms folded. He assures, "You won’t find a guy more sympathetic than me." The other guys blink. "But this is a competition, and we need someone willing to man up when presented with a giant gum ball machine."

"I can’t imagine that coming up, again," Anders states with a head scratch.

"Oh, you’d be surprised," Dirk assures with a nod.

Jerome shrugs and says, "I’m fine as long as it isn’t me." He walks off. Dirk looks over at Anders with a smirk.

"Welcome to your second campfire ceremony, and fourth elimination," Chris states. He counts on his fingers and thinks for a moment. He shakes his head. "Anyways, our safe contestants are…" He gestures to a tray of marshmallows and then lifts one. With his other hand he forms a fist and slams the tray with it, causing the marshmallows to sail through the air. Chris quickly names, "Luke, Dirk, Anders, Reginald, Brent, Evan, Herman, and Cary." The aforementioned men catch their marshmallows. "That leaves us with Jerome and Skylar and one marshmallow." Skylar forces a smile, while Jerome holds up his hand to look at his fingernails. "The last marshmallow goes to…"

"Jerome." Jerome catches his marshmallow out of the air.

Skylar stands up and nods. "Hey, it makes sense. At least I’m going home fair and square due to a traditional vote out."

Luke and Evan stand up to hug Skylar goodbye. "Hate to see you go, pard’," Luke states with a sad expression.

"I love you guys," Skylar assures. "I hope you destroy the competition." Skylar puts his hand in Evan’s, as they disengage from their hug. Skylar whispers, "Find out where this came from."

Chris says, "Thanks for competing this season. Your boat awaits." Skylar nods and heads down to The Dock of Shame and turns to wave at his former team members.

Later, Chris is shown on the dock. He states, "Thanks for tuning in. Make sure to tune in next time to an all new Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst."

After being left alone at the campfire ceremony, Evan looks down at the note passed on to him. He reads to himself, "I know what really happened on your season…"

### Chapter 7 - Runway or Another

"Welcome to an all new episode of Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst!" Chris McLean announces, with his arms extended. "This season has already been quite the rollercoaster. Thrills, chills, and… total drama! Last time, Patsy, Grace, and Tamira investigated what they suspected to be foul play against LeVar, and what I consider ratings." Chris clears his throat. "Spoiled, rich kid Reginald was voted by the viewers to return to the competition, where he joined The Raging Bulls, and also raising question of who votes in these things. At the challenge, Skylar received a mysterious note that seemed to break his concentration, and he choked. The Black Swans were victorious, sending The Raging Bulls to their second…" The intern drops the cue card to reveal the next one. Chris reads the newly revealed cue card with his usual smile, "I am a stupid jerk face." The host blinks. "Who wrote that? I mean it obviously wasn’t about me." The intern holding the cue cards shakes her head. She drops that card. Chris reads the next one, with a raised eyebrow. "Chris McLean… that was meant for you… After I rearrange your face, your own mother won’t be able to identify you, and not just because her deep rooted shame!" Chris’ eyebrows raise up abruptly. He puts a hand on his face. He states, "I spent a lot of money on this face."

Zane states from off camera, "Can you get a refund?"

The camera turns to Esme and Zane. Zane rubs his side, as he glares at Esme. Esme states, "Uh, Mr. McLean. This sounds like a serious threat. I… uh… think we should find out who wrote this, and…"

Chris laughs. He states, "This isn’t anything to get worked up about. Probably just one of the writers trying to build up suspense, and, you know, ‘total drama’?" Chris points at the intern holding the cue cards and says, "You’re fired, by the way." The intern looks shocked before being dragged off by some burly interns.

Zane looks on and laments, "Aw, man. That was one of the hot ones." Esme rolls her eyes.

Chris clears his throat, as a new intern holds up the cue cards. He continues, "… elimination." He blinks. "Skylar was sent to the Boat of Losers, not before passing off the note he received to his friend, Evan. What’s in store on tonight’s episode? Will the mysteries be solved? Who will go home? Stay tuned to find out!"

Patsy, Tamira, and Grace are gathered outside. They head toward the mess hall, as Patsy carries the bin full of dishes. Tamira walks a safe distance from the other women. She asks, "If we’re returning those disgusting dishes, what was the point of taking them in the first place?"

Patsy smirks as she sets the bin down on the front steps of the mess hall. She seems to not notice Brent sitting on the steps. The red head explains with a smirk, "I’m glad you asked.” She digs through her purse, and pulls out a notebook. A hooded figure walks past the women, bumping into Patsy, and causing her to drop her notebook.

Grace looks over at the person and warns, "Watch where you’re going…" She pauses. She glances to the side. "I mean… Pardon us."

The slender figure replies, with a raspy voice, "My bad." The person awkwardly stands for a moment. "Well… I’ll be going then." They walk away.

Patsy rifles through her notebook. "Oh yeah!" She stops on a page. "I commissioned the assistance of Ruth." She holds up an opened portion of the notebook. "I marked each of the dirty dishes, and Ruth drew copies of every contestants fingerprints." Patsy has a smug smile on her face.

Tamira lowers her sunglasses. She asks, "But… like… Didn’t you say everyone’s a suspect, or whatever?" Patsy nods. "So, like… What if Ruth is the perp? She could have purposely fudged up these fingerprints to misdirect us." Patsy looks off into the distance with a blank expression. Grace folds her arms.

Grace looks over at Brent. "What are you doing out here, slick?"

Brent looks around himself. He asks, "Me?" Grace nods, with a raised eyebrow. "I guess, it’s just a little crowded in my team’s cabin. I wanted to get a little fresh air." He pauses for a moment. "Did you say something about fingerprints, and… suspects? Is there something going on?"

Patsy blinks. "We’re going to go talk over there." The women walk away from Brent, left looking confused on the mess hall steps.

They head behind the men’s cabin, and pause when they notice Dirk looking into the window. They duck behind the side of the building, each with their heads poking around the corner. "What is he looking at?" Tamira asks. The other women shake their heads. "That’s a pretty fancy shirt he has on… for people that shop the clearance rack at Shirt Pier, anyway." Dirk buttons his fancy shirt up to the top, the collar having a choke hold on his thick neck. He leans in, protrudes his lips, and smooths his eyebrows.

"I wonder what he’s doing?" Patsy asks.

Tamira explains, "The impossible." Patsy and Grace look up toward her. "He’s trying to make himself look good."

Grace blinks. "I don’t think that’s…" Dirk takes a step back, looks up and down, and frowns. He pulls a sock out of his pocket, rolls it up, and stuffs it down the front of his pants. Dirk points at the window and does a clicking sound with his mouth. Grace and Patsy have wide eyes. "What is he…"

Tamira nods and assures, "They do that at my Toby’s work all the time, he says."

Grace and Patsy look up at Tamira. Patsy asks, "What does your husband do, again?"

Tamira laughs awkwardly, and insists, "He… works with mannequins." She nods with an awkward smile. "That’s right. They do that to display the men’s undies."

Tamira is shown in confessional. She admits, "Maybe I stretched the truth a little this time, but it, like, wasn’t a total lie. Tobes did have a fellow… business partner that went by the stage name ‘The Magic Mannequin’. His act was standing motionless on stage for seven minutes… Yeah… He didn’t have a job for very long."

Grace looks over and quietly alerts, "Someone’s coming this way." The three women duck back behind the corner.

Evan and Hae Won walk up as they talk to each other. Hae Won explains, "So at the end of the movie, they drive off into the sunset. Unfortunately, they didn’t notice the beware of cliff sign."

Evan laughs. "Sounds like comedy gold. I’ll have to watch it when I get back home. Maybe we could…"

Hae Won states, "Ugh. It’s Dirk."

Evan takes a look at Dirk and adds, "Apparently, you can polish a turd, after all."

Dirk turns toward the pair. He frowns, "What are you doing here?"

Hae Won replies, "It’s a free island."

Dirk puts a hand up. He states, "I wasn’t talking to you."

Evan blinks as he looks at Dirk’s crotch. He raises an eyebrow. He looks up, "As much as you might not like it, this is my cabin, too."

Dirk glances to the side. "I wasn’t talking to you, either, Bones."

"Then who…" Hae Won responds as she tilts her head.

Dirk goes on, "What’s with your constantly getting friendly with the enemy, Bones?"

"So now you’re talking to me?" Evan asks. "And it’s none of your business why I’m friends with the other team."

"Other team?" Dirk replies. "Oh, right. Anyway, I have an appointment at the medical tent."

"Good riddance," Hae Won retorts. "Too bad they can’t reverse your lobotomy there." Evan stifles a laugh.

"A bit of fashion advice," Evan adds, after clearing his throat, "from dude to dude. You might want to unbutton that top button. It’s making your head look like a mulleted tomato, bro." Dirk walks up to Evan, a few centimeters from his face. Evan gulps. "I… forgot how massive you are…"

Dirk replies, "Thanks, Bones. I don’t know much about fashion, but I do know it’s not safe to leave your undies exposed."

"What do you…" Evan begins, with slight concern.

Dirk quickly steps behind Evan, grabs hold of the elastic waistband of his underwear and yanks them upward, before letting go. Evan doubles over as he falls to the ground. Dirk lets out a hearty laugh. "See what I mean?" Dirk claps his hands to dust them off as he walks off, as Hae Won crouches down to check on Evan. Dirk looks back for a moment. He turns and unbuttons the top button of his collar before walking off into the night.

Tamira whispers, "Isn’t that grounds for disqualification?" Patsy shrugs.

Grace quietly explains, "Wedgies, noogies, and ‘purple nurples’ are all allowed under the contract… As is pushing people off of a cliff into shark infested waters…"

Tamira blinks. "Why do you know all this?" Grace shrugs.

"Are you okay?" Hae Won asks, her face showing her concern for Evan.

"Yeah," Evan assures, as she helps him to his feet. He exhales deeply.

"That guy is a grade A jerk wad," Hae Won assures. "He’ll get what’s coming to him…" She pauses. "Hey, since you said you’re alright, and everything, I kind of have something I need to take care of. Have a nice night." Hae Won abruptly walks into the night.

Evan blinks. He looks after her. "You have a nice night, too. By the way… Do you want to be my girlfriend?" He sighs, as he looks down at the ground. He stares down after noticing the note that Skylar passed off to him. He looks over his shoulder, and then back down as he struggles to crouch to pick up the message. He admits, "I guess I have an investigation to get to." He walks off into another direction.

"Investigation?" Patsy states with a curious expression. "Ladies. I’m going to hurry up and follow after him. One of you go follow Dirk to the medical tent, and one of you catch up with Hae Won. They’re the main leads we have, right now." The other women nod.

"I’ll…" Tamira begins.

"I call dibs on Hae Won," Grace states. She laughs slightly wickedly, as she rushes after Hae Won.

Tamira folds her arms as she groans. "I need to learn to move lightning fast, like Tobes." She begins heading toward the medical tent. As she passes the men’s cabin window, she glances inside, and then back. She pauses before she gazes in, again. She sees Cary in the room by himself, sitting on his bed, looking down at the floor. She looks forward, and places a finger thoughtfully on her chin. "Didn’t Brent say…" She shrugs it off. Tamira continues toward the medical tent.

Inside the medical tent, Tamira spots Dirk standing by himself. She crouches behind a table near the entrance, to escape notice. Nurse Bigby steps out of a tent flap, and approaches Dirk. He attempts a handshake, while Dirk awkwardly extends his arms for a hug. They each change positions a few times before committing to an awkward handshake hug combination. Dirk takes a deep breath and puffs out his chest. Nurse Bigby states, his rosy cheeks slightly redder than normal, "You look really good…" He points at his scrubs. "Sorry, I don’t compare to your fancy shirt."

Dirk begins unbuttoning his shirt as he assures, "I know I overdressed… I can take it off. It’s no problem."

Nurse Bigby states, "I appreciate that, but maybe later…" The nurse’s face turns red. "I mean…" Dirk shrugs, and ceases the unbuttoning. "I apologize Dirk… I still have about ten more minutes before I can take my break… There’s an intern that got hit by a random dagger the other night that I need to tend to." He points to a particular tent flap. "The break room is just over here. I’ll be there as soon as I can." Tamira looks over and begins crawling toward the break room.

"Thanks, Nurse," Dirk responds with a smile.

Nurse Bigby smiles back. "Uh. You can call me Bigby… If you want to. I’ll be right with you."

Dirk nods. He says, "Thanks, Bigby. I look forward to it." Nurse Bigby waves as he enters a different room. Dirk exhales, his chest going back to normal, and generally looking more comfortable. He looks down for a moment and lets out another sigh before heading toward the break room.

Luke walks by. He says, "Golly, Dirk. Two nights in a row of running into each other. I like the shirt."

"Thanks," Dirk responds. "Uh. How are you feeling?"

Luke laughs. "Mighty fine. How about you?"

"Okay, I guess," Dirk replies. Luke raises an eyebrow. He assures, "I mean, I think so…"

"It seems like a hen be peckin’ at your ankles," Luke responds. He asks, "What’s bothering you?"

Dirk kicks at the ground. He states, "Nothing… I… I guess maybe there is something, but it’s kind of stupid."

Luke says, "Shoot."

"I hate getting all gushy…" Dirk sighs. Dirk asks, "Do you ever question why people seem to like you? I know I’m not a great dude… Just earlier, there was this weakling, I… Never mind. I just get so mad, sometimes. There’s somebody I really like, and I feel like they like me, but I don’t understand what they see and me."

"You mean besides the glorious mullet?" Luke asks. Dirk laughs and nods. "I’m no expert on matters of the heart, but I reckon you shouldn’t worry about it. You’re funny, tough, and seem like you really care about your pals."

"I guess that part is true," Dirk responds. "It’s like, on the inside I want to be a good guy, and then on the other hand I can’t let things go…"

Luke puts a hand on Dirk’s shoulder. He explains, "You aren’t alone, buddy. I go through that sometimes, too."

Dirk shakes his head. "No way. You’re one of the nicest people I’ve ever met."

Luke laughs. "Maybe I put a little work into that, but I’ve been through a lot at my ripe young age, and I got the scars to prove it." Dirk nods. "But by golly, if I were to take it out on others, who would that be helping? I’d just be taking my hurt and spreading it like a disease, you know? We all have our problems, so I try my best not to add to ‘em." Luke smiles wide, exposing his gums.

Dirk admits, "I appreciate that… I hate to cut it short, but I have someone to meet." Luke nods. "Thanks, Luke."

Luke smiles, "Not a problem, Dirk. You’ll have to tell me how it works out." Dirk waves, as he begins to walk away. Luke adds, "Uh, Dirk?" Dirk turns back toward Luke. "Just remember to be yourself."

Dirk says, "Right," before turning around and discreetly removing the rolled up sock from the front of his pants and tossing it aside.

Dirk enters the break room, and sees Nursy Bigby bent over fishing something out of the vending machine. Dirk states, "Sorry, I’m late… Do you greet everybody like this, or am I one of the lucky ones?"

Nurse Bigby stands up, and blushes, a little. He says, "Hey, Dirk. It’s no problem. I was just grabbing some snacks for us. I wasn’t sure what you like, so I got one of each…" He drops an armful of chips and snacks on a coffee table. "I got bar-b-q, cool ranch, cooler ranch, sour cream and radish, Chunky Butters, beige cheddar…"

Dirk laughs. He admits, "I like all of those, but you didn’t have to go all out."

"I know it’s not a gourmet meal, or anything," Nurse Bigby assures. "But our options out here are kind of limited."

Dirk shakes his head. "Compared to the slop they feed us, this is a king’s feast."

Bigby laughs. He offers, as he gestures at a futon, "Fit for a king. Have a seat."

Dirk nods and sits next to him. Tamira lets out a yelp, a camera revealing her hiding under the futon. Dirk’s eyes widen, "Did you hear something?"

Bigby assures, "It’s not the newest futon. Chris seems to cut costs on some things, and go all out with others… My pay is not one of them."

"Typical Chris." Dirk states, "But enough about that guy… I want to know more about you."

"There’s not a whole lot to say," Bigby admits with a shrug of his shoulders.

"How did a strapping, smart guy like you end up here?" Dirk asks. "This isn’t exactly a reputable place of employment."

Bigby laughs. "I guess working on a television set is supposed to be good for résumés. What about you? Why did you agree to come on the show, again?"

"I didn’t have a whole lot going on," Dirk says with a shrug. "I just got out of college, and it seemed like a good time to do this. Plus, a part of me wanted to prove myself. Last time I was kind of a one note joke."

"I didn’t think so," Bigby assures. He blushes a little.

"You’re a fan of this trashy show?" Dirk asks, his eyes wide.

Bigby admits, a hand at the back of his head, "I guess the secrets out. I lied earlier… I really took this job because I’m a super fan. I’ve been watching since day one. I even applied to be a contestant, but didn’t get on. I thought this was a way to finally get on the show…"

"Who wouldn’t cast you?" Dirk asks, his jaw dropped. "You’re bright, charming, good looking, absolutely jacked, you have great hair, your pelvis is always showing… That’s always a top criteria."

Bigby’s rosy cheeks turn a very deep red, as he tugs his shirt down. He explains, "I was a lot skinnier when I was sixteen. Honestly, I got really deep into the casting process, but they ultimately decided not to cast me. I overheard someone in casting say that they had another gay contestant, already, and he had a sadder backstory."

"You were gay back then?" Dirk asks, his eyebrows raised.

Bigby laughs. He replies, "I’ve always been gay… But I’ve been out since I was around twelve." Dirk looks surprised. "My parents didn’t really understand, but they were supportive, as well as my friends. I was really lucky. How about you?"

Dirk looks to the side. He admits, "My parents don’t know. My mom has been out of the picture for some time. I never got the courage to tell my old man. He’s a real ‘men need to be men’ type. Most of the gay guys I know are some of the most manly men I’ve ever met, but he wouldn’t understand that. I’m out with my friends, and frat bros, and in general."

Bigby says, "He’ll know after watching this."

Dirk responds, as he looks to the side, "He’s not all that interested in what I do… Anyway…" Dirk clears his throat. He admits, "I, uh… didn’t know I was gay until my college years." Bigby looks surprised. "I mean I always liked being around other guys, but I didn’t consider a relationship as an option. Like, I knew about gay people, I wasn’t completely ignorant. I guess I thought it was for guys that couldn’t get dates with girls… But it wasn’t until college when I realized that I might be gay, and it explained a lot about my younger years. I know it sounds dumb, not being sure about something like that, but that’s just how it was. You know?"

Nurse Bigby assures, "A lot of people don’t understand themselves, right away. There’s no shame in that. So… Do you have a boyfriend, now?"

Dirk looks to the side. He replies, "No." He looks back at Bigby and explains, "I guess I’ve never had a real boyfriend. Just casual stuff." Dirk awkwardly laughs. "I’m more open to the idea these days… Anyway… What about you?"

Nurse Bigby responds, "I’ve had a couple boyfriends, but I’m single now. With my studies, working out, and career, it took most of my time and energy. I’ve never been great at keeping a relationship going, but out here it feels like I have the time to relax and reflect. So… uh… Do you maybe want to do this again… like an official date?"

"Yes, sir… I can’t wait to hang out at home… I know this great place called The Junk Yard." Tamira’s eyes shoot wide open. "Hey, before things get real serious and we move on to snack cakes, or something," Dirk begins. He looks down, and grabs a bag of pork rinds. "I kind of… lied earlier, too." He munches on some chips, as he nervously glances to the side.

"About what?" Bigby asks with a raised eyebrow.

"About college… I, uh… dropped out a few years ago," Dirk admits. "It was just… really hard…  The learning part. The drinking and partying was easy. I’ve had some odd jobs, since, but I quit my latest job a few weeks before coming out here, when they hired a woman manager…" Bigby laughs. "So… uh… I really like you, but don’t want you to not realize I’m a loser…"

"You’re not a loser," Bigby assures. "It’s just like discovering your sexuality. You just don’t what direction you want to go in life, yet. I know we just met, and all, but I like you, Dirk. I want to get to know you. All that doesn’t change anything."

Dirk throws his head back. He states, "Why are you so freakin’ perfect? I mean, you make me feel kind of bad when I lost it on that Evan jerk, earlier."

"I’m not perfect…" Nurse Bigby raises an eyebrow. "Evan, you said?"

Dirk nods. "Anyway… I don’t see what you could possibly see in…" Dirk brings his head back down and Nurse Bigby grabs hold of the sides of Dirk’s face and kisses him. The two kiss for a short while. Dirk blinks. He states, "Mm. What flavor chips is that?" Dirk licks his lips. "I want a pack of those."

Bigby laughs. "I think it’s the sour cream and radish chips. I think there’s still a few left." He reaches for the opened bag to pass them to Dirk. He admits, "I watched your season, back in the day. I admit, I had a giant crush on…" Dirk looks interested. "Levi." Bigby swoons. Dirk scratches his head, as he raises his other eyebrow. "I wore a green beanie the entire rest of that year."

"You must have been pretty mad about not getting on the show," Dirk states.

"I was pretty bitter, I won’t lie," Nurse Bigby admits with a nod, "and I know my parents were happy I didn’t get on. They didn’t want me to be distracted from my studies, despite pretending to be supportive. It really stung because they usually only cast sixteen year olds, so I only had one chance to get on.” He picks up an unopened bag of chips. "The lack of diversity in the casting really ground my gears." Bigby suddenly looks angry as he squeezes down on the bag of chips with his full force, causing them to explode and chips to fall all over the floor. Tamira looks on at the falling chips with wide eyes. She covers her mouth to hide a sharp gasp. Bigby looks over at Dirk, tilts his head, smiles, and says, "But I’m completely over it, now."

Dirk blinks. "That was kind of hot."

Bigby’s cheeks turn slightly red. He looks over at a clock. He stands up abruptly. "Dag. I guess time flies. I have to get back to work, but this was… nice."

"I guess you could say it was," Dirk begins, as he points his index fingers at Nurse Bigby, "all that and a bag of chips." Nurse Bigby begins laughing wildly. Dirk smiles, and laughs slightly. Nurse Bigby wipes a tear from his eye before gaining his composure.

"I’ll see you tomorrow night," Nurse Bigby states before hugging Dirk goodbye, and exiting the break room.

Tamira looks on as Dirk throws a bag of chips to the ground, and does a small victory dance. He jumps up and down on the futon, making her yelp each time. Dirk sits down on the futon, again. He sighs. "What a great guy…" He looks down at the floor, and begins cleaning up.

After Dirk leaves, Tamira crawls out from under the futon. She dusts off her camouflage dress as she whines, "Ack!" She looks down at her notes. "Maybe Dirk isn’t as big a creep as we thought…" She looks thoughtfully toward the exit, frowns, and rips the top page off her notes. She walks to the corner and buries the page in a potted plant. She then exits the room.

Grace is shown hiding in the bushes. She watches as Hae Won looks left and right before taking out a bobby pin in order to unlock the padlock to a fence protecting the construction site of a future challenge. Grace frowns and whispers to herself, "Am I the only one that doesn’t carry bobby pins?" She looks on as Hae Won rummages through various toolboxes. She puts some things in her bag before moving on.

"Hey, Hae Won!" A shrill voice shouts behind the silver haired woman. Hae Won jumps and quickly pulls a wrench from her bag as she quickly turns toward the newly arrived person. Zoe looks down at the wrench with a surprised expression. She raises her hands to the air as she assures, "I don’t have any valuables, besides my delts."

Hae Won exhales. She states, "Oh, it’s you, Chloe." She puts the wrench back into her bag.

"Uh, you mean, Zoe," Zoe corrects with a wince. "So… what are you doing here? Isn’t this stuff off limits to contestants?"

Hae Won stands awkwardly for a few moments. She finally replies, "I could never lie to you. I spoke with the staff about enhancing the gains of my workouts, so they told me to help myself to random heavy objects in order to build my strength as I carry them around the island."

Zoe raises an eyebrow. "That all sounds pretty silly to me," she says. Hae Won grimaces. Zoe points to a length of rope. "Here you are taking all this stuff for a workout, and you don’t even consider ropes for arms? Let me help you with that." She picks up the rope, and places it in Hae Won’s bag. Zoe looks around. "This’ll come in handy, too, I’m sure." She places a large pulley in Hae Won’s bag, causing Hae Won to fall to the ground. Zoe looks down with wide eyes. "Wow. I guess you really weren’t kidding about needing to bulk up."

From the ground, Hae Won asks, "Maybe you can help me carry this to…" She points to a nearby challenge set. "There."

Zoe lifts the bag with no issue. She states, "Okay. Just this one time, just so you can witness my technique." Zoe runs off as Hae Won locks the gate back up, before following after Zoe.

Grace looks down at her notes. She says to herself, "Maybe that wasn’t such a waste of time."

Patsy stands behind a fence and peaks over it as Evan jostles the lock to the previous challenge’s dressing room. She jumps out and says, "Aha! Caught you with your pants down!" Evan abruptly raises his hands in the air, as his shorts indeed fall down around his ankles. He looks down at his exposed boxer briefs. Patsy nervously states as she turns away and covers her eyes, "You can pick your shorts back up." Evan quickly pulls his shorts back up.

Evan apologizes, "I’m sorry about that. I lost a little weight recently…"

"I’m partly to blame," Patsy insists. "With surprising you, and all… What are you doing out here, anyway? It looks mighty suspicious."

Evan rubs his chin. He says, "How do I put this without sounding strange… Can I trust you?" Patsy nods. He hands a note to Patsy. "Somebody slipped this in Skylar’s things in the challenge earlier."

Patsy reads, "’I know what really happened on your season.’" She pauses for a moment. "This looks like the work of our saboteur!"

“Saboteur?" Evan asks as he scratches his head.

"Uh…" Patsy responds, nervously. "That is…"

"Now that you mention it," Evan replies. "There have been some odd goings on. Like those bags being cut open, or that weird note left for Blair and our team in the first challenge."

Patsy thinks for a moment. She asks, "You noticed those things, too?"

"I guess I didn’t think anything of it, until you said something," Evan admits with a shrug. "To answer your earlier question, I thought if I could look in here I might find some sort of clue toward who left that note."

"Do you know what it means?" Patsy asks.

Evan shakes his head. He says, "I have no idea. I spent a lot of time with him. Skylar was squeaky clean on our season." He shrugs, again. "I don’t know if that matters all that much, though. Maybe they were just trying to trigger him."

"If only we could get in there…" Patsy states. "But I didn’t bring a bobby pin…"

Evan pulls out a bobby pin from his shorts pocket. "I always have one on me. Good thinking." Patsy blinks. "So do you want to do the honors?"

Inside the dressing room, Evan points to Skylar’s dressing room. "He got changed in here." He opens the curtain and lifts up the bag.

"Careful with that!" Patsy shouts. "Fingerprints!" Evan’s eyes get wide as he drops the bag to the ground. Patsy shakes her head with a smirk. "Maybe you ought to leave it to the professional."

"I would, but it’s just you and me h…" Evan pauses, as Patsy glares at him. "You meant you… Uh..  I knew that."

Patsy snaps one of her gloves as she lifts the bag and begins rummaging through it. "Nothing too strange here. I…"

"Wait," Evan states. "Does his bag have a label with Skylar’s name on it?"

Patsy turns the bag and states, "Yes. Mine did, too."

Evan frowns. He turns toward his dressing room and returns with another bag. He explains, "This one was mine. It didn’t have my name on it. See?"

Patsy holds her glasses as she examines the bag. "You’re right. It doesn’t. That’s peculiar." She looks down at Skylar’s bag. She pulls on the name tag. "This was barely hanging on…" She gasps as Evan’s name is revealed beneath Skylar’s.

"You mean?" Evan responds. "That was meant for me? Poor Skylar… How did the names get messed up?"

"Maybe it got caught on something and fell off," Patsy suggests with a shrug.

"That really sucks for Skylar…" Evan replies. The slender skater hangs his head down.

Patsy holds a hand to her chin. "Now that I think about it, his clothes were…" She pauses. "I know you don’t have my deductive reasoning, but did you happen to notice something unusual about Skylar’s costume for the challenge?"

Evan nods. "Yeah. Not a whole lot was left to the imagination…" Patsy places a hand on her forehead. Evan adds, "Now that I think of it… My clothes were a little baggy." His eyes widen. "Wait…"

Patsy smirks. "Now you’re catching on."

Skylar places a hand on his head. "You mean… This note was meant for me?" Patsy nods with her continued smirk. "But what does it mean? I didn’t have a chance to do much of anything on my season… I mean… besides sign my mother’s name on the parental consent form… But everyone already found that out."

Patsy asks, "Are you sure there isn’t anything you’re hiding?" Evan shakes his head. Patsy pulls out her notepad. She asks, "Was there anyone that might want to get revenge on you from your season?"

Skylar thinks for a moment and then shakes his head. He states, "I mean, it’s just me, Luke, and Zoe left from my season. Luke is one of my best friends, and Zoe… We didn’t interact a whole lot."

"I suppose it could be someone with some insider information, or someone just attempting to rattle you," Patsy suggests. "But we can’t rule those two out." Patsy puts a hand to her chin. "Or maybe you did this as a misdirect…"

Evan’s eyes widen. "Wait, what? Skylar was my homie."

Patsy laughs. "I said that to see your reaction."

Evan blinks. "Uh… Did I pass?" Patsy walks away without responding, a smug smile on her face. Evan hurriedly follows after her.

"Stop!" Patsy quietly directs. "Somebody’s coming." She places a hand on Evan’s chest. Evan looks down at her gloved hand, his cheeks looking slightly flushed. Patsy grasps Evan’s hand, and leads him to some bushes behind a caution sign warning of various potential construction related accidents.

Evan asks, "Why are we hiding?" He looks up at the hooded figure, holding a pair of hedge clippers. "Who is that?" He whispers.

"Shh!" Patsy shushes, as she places a finger to Evan’s lips. He looks down at her finger, as she presses close to him. Evan begins sweating and tugs at his collar.

The figure looks down at the already removed padlock. They drop their hedge clippers before entering the dressing room. Patsy stands up. Evan whispers, "What are you doing? He’ll see you!"

Patsy states, "This is our chance to catch the suspect red handed. If we lock the dressing room, they won’t the able to get out."

Evan grasps Patsy’s hand. He states, "Let me do it. I’m quicker. Plus, if he catches us, I can put up more of a fight."

Patsy asks, "Are you sure?" Evan nods, as he steps out from behind the sign. "Be careful!" Evan nods. He takes a deep breath before tip toeing toward the dressing room. As he slowly approaches the door, he looks down at the hedge clippers. He crouches down and picks them up before approaching the dressing room. He also retrieves the lock.

After Evan stands, he begins to close the door. He hesitates for a moment. Patsy looks on with a mix of concern and confusion. He turns toward Patsy’s direction and mouths, ‘I’m going to take a quick peak of who this is.’ He turns before seeing Patsy shake her head and wave her arms. Evan slowly and quietly opens the door. He leaves it open slightly. He doesn’t see anything. He continues looking as he furrows his brow. He turns back to Patsy and shrugs. As Evan turns back toward the door, he still sees no one. Patsy’s eyes widen. She calls out, "Look out!" Suddenly, the figure jolts toward the door, and is able to push the door open wider, catching Evan off guard, and making him drop the hedge clippers close to his leg. Patsy begins rushing toward the scuffle. Evan still attempts to push the door closed, as the suspect is able to squeeze an arm through the slightly ajar door. They grasp at Evan, batting at his head, and shoulder. Finally they grasp at his face, and claw him across his brow. The figure then is able to overpower Evan and push the door open. Evan falls down to the ground moments later, on his back, holding his face, and groaning. The figure stands above Evan, and reaches down toward the hedge clippers. Patsy stops a few yards from the incident. She holds her arms up and pleads, "Please, leave him alone!" She pauses and asks, "Who are you?" The figure stands up, and a slight smirk can be seen on their mouth, barely visible in the moonlight. A bright circle of light abruptly shines on Evan and the hooded figure.

A man’s voice shouts, "Freeze!" Startled, the hooded figure rushes away from the scene, before they can be apprehended.

Patsy calls out as she shields her eyes and looks into the light. "Evan! Are you hurt?"

"I’m fine," Evan weakly insists, gruffly. "You should chase after the perp…"  A few officers head in the direction that the assailant disappeared off to. Evan looks over at the newly arrived man. "Who are you, pretty boy?" Evan shields his eyes as he looks at the approaching man.

"You can call me Douglas," the handsome man states, with a Scottish brogue. He hands his flashlight over to Patsy as he stands over Evan, and asks, "Can you stand, laddie?"

Evan looks up at the kilt wearing, uniformed man, and insists, "I think so. It’s really not as bad as it looks." Douglas shakes his head, his clearly Asian features and deep blue eyes highlighted in the moonlight. Evan squints as he looks up at the officer’s name tag. "Anyway, Officer McHottie…"

"It’s Officer McCuddy," Douglas corrects.

"Right-o, McHottie," Evan states. He looks up. "I take it you couldn’t invest in some McDrawers."

"Evan!" Patsy reprimands. "This officer is here to help. He saved you just now."

Evan insists, "I almost had the guy. I was just lulling him into a false sense of security, with lying all helpless on the ground like that."

"It’s okay, miss," Douglas assures, as he helps Evan to his feet. "Evan here was just subject to some traumatic events, so he is understandably upset." Evan glares to the side. "If you’ll excuse me." Douglas steps aside to speak with some other officers in the distance.

"I wonder what the police are doing here?" Patsy asks. "Do you think they know about the saboteur?"

"Seems like it," Evan admits. He pauses. "Sorry about earlier… The popo just make me irritable."

Patsy responds, "I can understand that, but you really were in danger. I’m sorry I didn’t come to help sooner." Evan pushes himself up onto his elbows. "Maybe you shouldn’t stand, just yet."

Evan frowns. He insists, "I really am fine…" He looks at a frowning Patsy, with her arms folded. "Hey… That was all kind of exciting, earlier. We make a pretty good team."

Patsy places two fingers on the bridge of her nose. She insists, "You could have been seriously hurt with your recklessness… But… Yes. It was rather exhilarating." Patsy gasps, after looking more closely at Evan. "You’re bleeding!" Evan puts a hand to his face, and then looks at it. He looks at his hand blankly. "You really should go get that checked out."

"It’s not as bad as it looks," Evan insists. "But if you think I should go get it checked out, I will…" He pauses for a moment. "Hey, I wouldn’t mind some comp…"

"Alright," Patsy replies. "While you head over to the medical tent, I have something I need to attend to."

"On the other hand…" Evan begins. "Maybe I could join…" Patsy abruptly walks away into the night. Evan looks after her with a frown. He rubs his face, before walking in the other direction.

Patsy, Grace, and Tamira are gathered together, outside of their cabin. Patsy leads, a big smirk planted on her face, "Do you have anything to report, ladies?"

Grace begins, as she looks down at her notes, "I did witness Hae Won doing something rather peculiar…"

"I’ll start," Patsy interrupts. Grace glares at her. "My investigations were interrupted by a mysterious individual who was snooping around. I narrowly escaped, and they… also escaped… but there was a fight with some hedge clippers, and the police were involved, and…"

"Wait." Tamira states. "The police are here? Maybe we should tell them what we know?"

Patsy shakes her head. "I plan on solving this case, first. Think of the headlines." She waves her hands in the air. "‘World Renowned Novelist Solves Harrowing Total Drama Massacre That Baffles Police’."

Grace raises her eyebrows and repeats, "Massacre?"

Patsy states, "Nothing to be alarmed about. They always embellish headlines, besides the ‘World Renowned Novelist’ part. Either of you learn anything? I mean, I’m sure it pales in comparison to what I found. Speaking of which… I found something curious on that duffel bag. I’ll have to show you later…"

Grace states, "I did see Hae Won gathering some suspicious objects with the help of Zoe. I think we need to keep an eye on her…"

Patsy shrugs. "I’m sure it’s nothing." Grace frowns. "How about you, Tamira?"

Tamira looks nervously to the side. "What about me?"

"Did you catch Dirk in the act?" Patsy asks.

"In the act?" Tamira repeats awkwardly. "Uh… No. I didn’t see Dirk making out…" Grace and Patsy look surprised. "Like a bandit, that is… Now that you mention it. I actually lost him."

"You lost that walking meat pile?" Grace asks in disbelief.

Tamira replies, "I know, right?" She taps on her head with her fist and sticks her tongue out. "Silly me." She looks to the side. "But there was something kind of strange… And by strange I don’t mean that I’m judging anyone’s lifestyle…"

"Spill it," Patsy states.

"You know that hulking male nurse that looks like he could be a dancer at one of those tasteful exotic dancing joints?" The other women look at her blankly. She blushes as she avoids eye contact. "Anyway, I overheard him say… By himself… That he had tried applying to the show in the past, or whatever. He still seemed pretty mad about it, tbh."

"He was just standing around monologuing?" Grace asks with her arms folded.

Tamira nods rapidly. She responds, "I thought that was strange, too. Anyway, I think he might be someone to watch, and junk."

Patsy holds a hand to her chin. She states, "If the saboteur isn’t a contestant… That definitely would not be as good publicity. We’ll have to rule him out."

"But he…" Tamira starts.

Patsy continues, "I forgot. I did find this." She holds up Evan’s bag. "It appears that Skylar was a victim of the saboteur. We’ll inspect the fingerprints, tomorrow." The women nod. As she slides the bag under her bed.

The following day, Zane stands outside. He pulls out a bugle from behind his back and begins blowing into it. Esme can be heard from the loudspeakers saying, "Rise and shine, campers! Rise and shine! We have an all day challenge, so if you could meet Chris outside, immediately, we can begin."

The contestants gather outside in their sleepwear, all looking groggy, except for Zoe and Quimberly. Zoe runs in place, dramatically kicking her legs up in the process. Ruth looks over at her, slouched forward. Ruth asks, "How are you this energetic? We just woke up."

Zoe, with a chipper smile cemented on her face, explains, "Just woke up? I’ve already been awake for three hours. The early bird gets the gains."

Ruth groans. She looks over at Quimberly, who also does not look disheveled. "What’s your story?"

"I just woke up like this." Quimberly flicks her hair.

Ruth glares at Quimberly, still hunched forward, and with heavy eyelids. She says, "Must be a hard life."

Chris soon arrives, accompanied by two police officers, one on each side. "What’s with the fuzz?" Jerome asks, with a raised eyebrow.

Chris puts a hand on his face. "I didn’t shave this morning. It’s one of my trademarks."

"No, I…" Jerome starts.

"Oh, these two?" Chris adds, as he gestures toward the two officers, a petite blonde woman and a First Nations man with a large frame and braided hair. "Not to alarm anyone, but someone may or may not have threatened my life." Some of the contestants gasp. "These two are an extra security precaution, not that I expect anything bad to happen." Grace, Patsy, and Tamira all look at each other.

"Interesting how Chris will endlessly put our lives at risk, but actually does something when he feels he’s in danger," Jerome states with his arms folded.

Reginald states, "Welcome to the lifestyles of the rich and famous." Jerome frowns. Reginald raises a hand. "Can I expect my own security team, as well?" Chris doesn’t pay any attention to the wealthy competitor.

From the side, Douglas steps forward. He explains, "If any of you wee lads and lassies see anything suspicious, be sure to alert me, any of the other officers, or a member of the show’s crew." Esme stands next to Douglas, her eyes fixed on him as she holds her clipboard tight.

"You seem familiar," Blair states, her comment directed at the officer.

"Me?" Douglas responds. "Well… I may have appeared on this show in the past, very briefly."

Blair looks at him for a moment. She shakes her head, and says, "No. I remember now." She looks coy. "It was in my dreams. Rawr!"

Douglas’ eyes widen as he takes a step back. He assures, "I’m taken." He raises his ring finger. He looks down and states, "I’m a right dobber. I forgot me fake wedding ring." Blair waves at him, he grimaces as he waves back.

"I don’t recall you talking like this," Quimberly observes.

Douglas explains, "I was in character last time, wee lass. Brogues and the word ‘wee’ were among me mark’s dating site ‘turn offs’." Quimberly quits feigning interest.

Chris announces, "Today’s challenge is fashion!"

Dirk glares to the side and groans, "Girl stuff." Mid-clap Jerome glares at Dirk.

Chris further explains, "Each team will be given enough material to create a collection and design outfits for eight team members." Ruth appears to look uncomfortable. "The Raging Bulls will need to sit someone out."

"I’m out," Dirk states as he raises his hand.

"I doth think it sounds fun," Herman admits. "I design my own costumes for LARPing all the time."

Quimberly smiles. She looks over at Dirk, and comments, "Real men aren’t afraid to be in touch with their feminine side." Dirk rolls his eyes.

"They also moisturize," Jerome assures. "Feel my face." He places Luke’s hand on his face. Luke looks impressed.

"Did you see that frilly pink dress I wore the other day?" Cary asks with an eager smile.

Evan hurriedly admits, "I like a strawberry daiquiri on occasion." The others look at him with confused looks. He turns to Cary and mutters, "You win this round."

In The Black Swans’ workroom, Blair asks, "We should appoint a leader. Any volunteers?"

Tamira begins raising her hand. Patsy slaps her hand down. Tamira looks at her with wide eyes, and whispers, "What was that for? I totes have experience with putting together an outfit with my web series ‘Bougee on a’…"

Patsy shakes her head. "No one cares. We need all hands on deck to keep an eye out for any clues. You know what happens when you get distracted?" Tamira shrugs. Patsy doesn’t seem to be paying attention, anymore.

"What say you, Quimmy?" Blair asks.

"I say you never call me that, again," Quimberly responds. Blair winces, before groveling for forgiveness. She points her finger at another contestant. "I also say she does it."

Everyone follows the direction of her finger, and settle on Ruth, sitting in the corner drawing in her sketchbook. Ruth looks surprised. She asks, "Me?" She profusely shakes her head. "I’m totally happy helping behind the scenes on this one."

"You heard Quimberly," Zoe states. "Come on. You’ll do great." She swings a fist to the side. "I’ll be your right hand man."

Blair leans toward Ruth and whispers, "She is a woman, right?" She pauses as she looks down at Ruth’s sketchbook. She looks up and says, "Gosh, everybody! Come take a look at this!"

"These designs are great," Zoe states, as she looks on.

Tamira adds, "They’re totally average." Patsy nudges her with her elbow. Tamira adds, "I mean, it’s not something I would wear irl, but I like it well enough."

Ruth insists as she holds a sketchbook to her chest, "These? They’re really not designs. They’re just… doodles."

"Show a little confidence," Zoe assures, with another swing of her fist. She places an arm around Ruth’s shoulders. "Your artistic vision is what our team… No… It’s what the world needs, now."

Blair looks at Ruth with sparkling eyes and a pout. She asks, "You will do it, right?"

Ruth sighs. She looks to the side and says, "Yes." Most of the others look pleased. Zoe tightens her arm around Ruth’s neck, causing Ruth’s eyes to widen.

Ruth is shown in confessional. She admits, "This challenge reminds me of the one I went home on last time. But this time, the team seems so supportive…" She looks to the side. "I wonder what they’re up to."

In The Raging Bulls’ workroom, Reginald states, "So we have Jerome and Herman taking the lead, with their design and sewing skills."

Anders adds, "Ja. What are you fellas planning?"

Jerome spreads his hands through the air in exaggerated fashion as he explains, "I’m thinking volume. Overcoats that drape all the way to the floor, honey. Flow for days, child." He snaps his fingers with an, "Mm!"

"That sounds super," Cary says in support. He looks up at the clock. "Gosh. Do you think we’ll have time?"

Jerome smirks. He states, "Never underestimate Jerome, baby." He snaps his fingers, again. "Bring me our materials."

Reginald nods toward Luke. "That’s my cue," Luke states, as he picks up a crate labelled ‘Raging Bulls Materials’ and hauls it over to the table Jerome is stationed at. "Heavy lifting is one of the few things I’m good at."

"Don’t sell yourself short," Cary assures with a smile.

Luke replies, as he looks at the other men, "Golly. I reckon I’m one of the taller gents here."

Cary frowns and begins, "No, I…"

Anders opens the crate for his team. Jerome states, "I’ll need plenty of cashmere, chiffon, and silk to complete my vision. It will be an eleganza extravaganza!" He looks inside the crate. His eyes show his surprise. "This is it? There’s barely any fabric here. Where is the eleganza?" He grimaces as he holds up a piece of fabric. He looks horrified as he asks, "Is this Lycra?"

"I thinketh it is," Herman confirms with a head nod.

Jerome drops the fabric with a look of repulse as he states, "Well, scrap my idea. Just tell me what to do Herman, dear."

Herman blinks. He asks, "Me?"

Reginald nods as he places a long thin hand on the LARPers shoulder. "This is your time to shine, Herman my boy."

"Do you have any ideas?" Brent asks.

Herman places a hand on his chin as he looks through the material. He looks confused, but suddenly his eyes light up. He states, "I think I hath an idea."

Herman states in confessional, "I doth believe that the gentlefolk on my team might protest to my inspiration, but as fair tribute to my dear friend, I hath decided to combine two of his great loves. Wokémon and professional wrestling."

Ruth is shown tossing fabric around the room. A roll of purple polka dot fabric lands on top of Blair. Zoe leans toward Blair and states, "Let me take that off of you."

Blair states, "Shh. You’ll interrupt her process."

Zoe pauses. She repeats, "Process?" She looks on as Ruth continues to toss fabric about. She puts a hand on her chest and admits, "It is rather mesmerizing." A bead of sweat forms on her brow. "It calls to mind the time honored art of ribbon dancing."

Hae Won leans back on her chair. She states, "Well, I’m not really useful in this challenge. I might as well go hit the confessional.”

Patsy looks over at Hae Won. She leans toward Tamira and whispers, "We should tail Hae Won. I think she might be up to something."

"Sure," Tamira states. "Just let me…"

"Do you sew?" Quimberly asks.

Tamira responds, as she blushes, "To think my reputation proceeds me."

"Get to work," Quimberly states. Tamira turns toward Patsy and mouths ‘Sorry’. She begins working on one of Ruth’s designs.

Patsy turns toward Grace. She whispers, "Are you in?" Grace nods.

Quimberly asks Grace, "Do you sew?" Grace shakes her head. Quimberly nods toward Zoe. Zoe nods and places an armful of fabric into Grace’s arms. Quimberly instructs, "Don’t move from this spot."

Grace turns toward Patsy and apologizes, "Sorry. Looks like you’re on your own this time."

"Cover for me." Patsy frowns, as she presses herself against the wall and sidesteps her way to the exit.

"What’s her problem?" Quimberly asks with a raised eyebrow.

Grace replies, "No idea."

In the men’s workroom, Jerome finishes sewing a pair of wrestling trunks. He holds them up and frowns. He admits, "We’re not going to win with just this."

Reginald holds a hand to his chin. He looks over at Anders and Luke, sitting on the side. "Gentlemen, I’m going to need your help in gathering anything in this room that remotely resembles fabric. I’m sure we’ll receive kudos for using unconventional materials." Luke and Anders stand and begin rushing around the room in an effort to find material, ripping down curtains, ripping off chair lining, and such.

"I liketh the way you thinketh," Herman states with a smile. He turns back to his sewing. "You’re a natural leader."

In confessional, Reginald states with a hand pressed against his chest, "Did you hear that, Daddy?"

Outside, Patsy looks for Hae Won. Evan walks up and says, "Hey."

Startled, Patsy states, "What are you doing out here?"

Evan responds with his arms raised, "Sorry for scaring you. My team didn’t really need me. They told me just to stand there and look skinny, so I thought I’d burn a few calories. Hey, you won’t believe this, but I overheard a crew member talking about a twist for the elimination. I didn’t get full details, but…"

Patsy blinks. "Oh yeah. Before I forget… The strangest thing when I examined that bag of yours. The only fingerprints I found on the tags belonged to you and Skylar."

"What does it mean?" Evan asks as he stares blankly.

"I guess the perp wore gloves, so it’s a dead end," Patsy responds with a shrug. Her eyes widen suddenly. She grabs hold of Evan and pulls him with her behind a tree. She states, "Quiet."

He peaks over the tree and sees Hae Won. "You’re following Hae Won? I’m fairly certain she wasn’t the one that accosted me."

"Who’s back there?" Hae Won calls out.

Evan whispers, "Put in a good word for me."

Patsy stumbles from behind the tree. She waves, and states, "Oh, hi, Hae Won. When did you get here?"

"Oh, it’s just you," Hae Won replies. "It got a little stuffy in there for you, too, huh?"

Patsy responds, "Uh. Yeah. Stuffy."

"I’m glad it’s you, and not…" Hae Won begins. "Never mind." Patsy raises an eyebrow. "I was getting kind of uncomfortable in there."

Patsy frowns. She asks, "What do you mean?"

Hae Won sighs. She admits, "My creativity isn’t exactly considered as art by most. I don’t want to get in the way. I didn’t want to draw attention to it. Besides. They took my measurements so I’m not needed for now. Anyway, I have something I have to grab at the cabin."

"Before you go…" Patsy states. "You said you were glad it was me and not someone else. Who did you mean?"

Hae Won looks over her shoulder. She explains, "I don’t want to sound mean. He seems like a nice guy, and all, but sometimes he comes on a little too strong… And he’s always popping up out of nowhere, and joining me when I don’t ask him to."

"Are you talking about…" Patsy begins.

"Evan," Hae Won confirms with a nod. "If I have to cut him off before he asks me out one more time…" Patsy looks surprised. She looks back at the tree she was hiding behind. "I’m sorry if that sounds harsh. He just isn’t my type."

"Is there any reason you say that?" Patsy asks with a raised eyebrow. "Is it because he’s skinny?"

"Good one…" After a moment, Hae Won replies with wide eyes, "You mean you don’t know?" Patsy shakes her head. "With him being a pro skater in the public eye… It’s all over the Internet, all the time. He has a reputation of being a bit of a womanizer… Like a serial cheater. He can never stay in a relationship for long… Definitely gives me weird vibes."

Patsy looks surprised, again. She responds, "I’m sure it’s not all that bad."

"Even if it isn’t true," Hae Won replies, "I have my own career to consider, and I don’t want his reputation to ruin mine." Hae Won looks to the side, looking slightly uncomfortable. "I still consider him a friend, and all, and really feel sorry for the way Dirk treats him. That’s why I…" Patsy looks up at Hae Won. Hae Won abruptly pauses. "Anyway… I should get going... Later."

Hae Won walks away. Patsy looks after her. Once she’s out of view, Patsy rushes to where she left Evan standing. "Evan… I’m so sorry you had to hear that, I’m sure it’s just a misunderstanding." Evan has his head held down. He doesn’t speak or move for over a minute. Patsy stands silently, as she looks to the side with her eyelids looking heavy.

Evan finally speaks, "Is that how you feel, too?"

"What?" Patsy replies, looking genuinely surprised. "Not at all."

"Sure… Thanks…" Evan replies. He gets quiet, again. "Look… I want to be by myself for a while." Patsy nods, as she places a hand on her arm. Evan walks off by himself. Patsy looks after him in concern.

Back in the women’s workroom, Ruth is shown from the neck up. She looks at her teammates and states, "I know it’s almost time to go out there, but I feel like something is missing…" she squints her eyes, before reopening them and then snapping her fingers. "Zoe. Did they provide any wigs?"

Zoe looks through a crate and affirms, "Yes.”

Tamira adds, "For some reason they gave us a bunch of pussycat wigs all in our hair colors." Tamira holds up a purple one.

Ruth smirks and states, "That couldn’t match my vision better. Now what to do about the runway walks."

"I’ve never walked a runway before," Blair admits. She gulps. "What should I do?"

Quimberly states, "Just look like you’re not thinking about anything, at all. The more dead behind the eyes you look, the better." Blair looks confused but nods as if she understands.

At the challenge, Chris stands on the runway, his two officer guards stand on either side of the runway, as he announces to the camera, "Each team will soon walk the runway in their creations."

"Lame," Dirk states sitting on one of the stools on the side.

"You don’t believe in your teammates?" Chris asks.

Dirk shrugs. He reveals, "I don’t really know how they did. I took a nap."

"Among the esteemed judging panel are me…" Chris squints as he looks at his cue card, "and two extinguished fashion experts." The camera pans to two people, a man and a woman with a finger in her ear.

Dirk scratches his head and says, "Aren’t they just a couple interns?" Dirk turns his attention to a strong looking black man standing on the end of the runway holding a camera in front of his face. Dirk points a thumb at him and asks, "Who’s the stud muffin?”

Chris ignores the comment. "Let’s get the show started with The Raging Bulls."

Reginald is the first to walk the runway. As he reaches the end of the runway he poses with his arms extended to show off his dark cape that simulate wings. Besides an ornate headdress, Reginald is wearing blue boots and a small pair of blue and purple wrestling trunks. The judges and Dirk look on with wide eyes. Dirk asks, "When did Reginald get abs?"

Herman, Cary, and Evan walk the runway in a montage. Herman wears a golden luchador mask with light blue trunks. A red, plastic jewel is glued at the forehead of the mask. Cary sports colorful red, yellow, and white face paint with black arm bands with brown and white fabric hanging for them. He looks slightly embarrassed in his small brown trunks, his bare torso on full display. Evan walks out with a fake purple snake wrapped around his shoulders. His tights are purple, black, yellow, and red. Dirk boos from the sidelines. Evan doesn’t look his way, but discreetly flips him off at the end of the runway.

Anders is next to walk out in a white singlet with blue or red triangles and squares on it. Dirk whistles from the sidelines and shouts, "Now this show is finally getting started."

Zane looks on at Anders. He scratches the side of his head. He leans down toward Esme and whispers, "Are those the curtains from the workroom?" Esme is unresponsive.

Next, Jerome walks out in black trunks with a championship belt. He raises an eyebrow at the end of the runway, before turning and walking off. Brent walks onto the runway after Jerome leaves, sporting a red vest with metal blade-like looking fasteners. Luke is last on the runway for The Raging Bulls. He is wearing small blue trunks with a tough, battle hardened looking tortoise on the front. Dirk cheers. He pauses after noticing the long scar along Luke’s torso. Dirk furrows his brow.

Dirk and Esme seem to be the only ones cheering. Chris steps on stage with a confused expression. He states, "Well… That certainly was… interesting. I’m not sure I want to know."

As Jerome and the others guys join Dirk as spectators, Dirk places a hand on Jerome’s shoulder. He assures, "I was wrong about the challenge. It was way more butch than I expected."

Jerome blinks. He replies, "I guess that’s a compliment coming from you, boo…"

Chris announces, "Next up The Black Swans are ready to strut their stuff." He looks down at the men in their scant costumes, "I predict this won’t be much of a competition, but I suppose we have to continue. Ladies!" Chris walks behind the curtain.

One by one, the women step onto the runway and walk down the center. After Blair and Hae Won walk the runway, Reginald leans in toward Jerome and asks, "Does it seem like they had way more fabric to work with?" Jerome nods as he looks on with one raised eyebrow. Patsy, Grace, Tamira are the next to walk each with blank expressions on their faces. Each contestant on The Black Swans has either a blue and green striped shirt dress, a blue hoodie, brown pants or shorts, or a combination of everything. Tamira looks surprised when she notices a dark skinned man at the end of the runway photographing her. He waves. She hesitates for a moment and then regains her composure. Quimberly, Zoe, and Ruth are the last to walk the runway. After Ruth leaves the stage, all of the women return to the runway at once and strut down the runway in a line. The cast and crew applaud as the women do their final walk.

Brent leans in and asks Herman, "Do their outfits look… familiar somehow?"

As he applauds, Herman replies, "I am uncertain, squire."

After the women leave the stage, Chris walks onto the stage while clapping. He admits, "Now that was much better. It was so basic and uninspired, that it was genius."

Someone with a bushy mustache, and raspy voice steps behind Dirk. They state, "Excuse me, mister."

Dirk looks at the person from the side of his eye. He questions, "Yeah?"

The person clears their throat. "Mr. McLean wanted me to check your mic pack."

Dirk looks up and down at the person. He states, "Hey… You’re not bad looking." The person looks a little embarrassed. Dirk lifts up his shirt and faces away from them. "Have at it." The mysterious person smirks.

The women join the men off of the runway. Patsy stands by Brent. Brent leans in as he looks over at the cameras. He asks, "Hey, did you see where that one intern went off to? The mean looking one with the red hair. He was standing over there by the crew in one of the shirts from yesterday’s challenge. I thought that was kind of odd. Anyway, he’s been gone for a few days so I figured Chris fired him, or something."

Patsy looks confused. She looks over to where Brent drew attention. Chris announces from on the runway, "I don’t even need to confer with the judges, The Black Swans are the winners of the challenge!"

Jerome furrows his brow and states, "That is not fair. They obviously were given more fabric than us." Patsy looks over at him with a raised eyebrow.

Dirk puts his hands around his mouth. He shouts, "Boo! I demand a recount! We were a bunch of studs, give or take a…" Dirk’s eyes widen as he is hoisted through the air. A hook attached to a rope has been placed through the back of his underwear as he is pulled through the air. He shouts, "Ow ow ow ow! This is just like my days as a pledge!"

Most of the others point and laugh. Chris doubles over and falls on the runway clutching his stomach as he laughs. The guards that were on either side of him rush off the runway in order to help get Dirk down.

Patsy looks at Chris. She looks above him, looking shocked. She yells out, "Chris! Look out!" Chris pauses and looks up as one of the lights plummets toward him. Quimberly does a front flip onto the runway, grabs hold of Chris and rolls him out of the way before the light crashes, breaking through the wooden boards of the runway. The officers and several players run over to the stage.

Chris assures, "I’m okay."

Zane asks, "That’s nice. What about Quimberly?"

Quimberly stands up and dusts herself off. She assures, "No reason to be alarmed. I am safe." Most of the others give sighs of relief.

Patsy notices a hooded figure attempting to run toward the exit. She calls out, "Somebody stop them!"

Anders reaches out and easily grabs the suspicious figure by the hood, revealing an angry looking red haired man swinging his arms and legs in an effort to get free. Reginald reaches out to hold one of his arms in place. "Wait… Who is that?" Blair asks with wide eyes.

Chris walks over. He opens his mouth. "I… have no idea."

Patsy smirks. She states, "Or do you?"

Chris blinks. He responds, "I really have no idea."

"Chris is infamous for his cruelty and mistreatment of interns," Patsy states.

Chris frowns. Esme adds, "Uh, in addition to your sculpted physique and unnaturally white smile."

Chris smiles and nods. "You may continue."

Patsy points at the hovering intern, "This is an example of yet another one of Chris’ cruel firings. He snuck into one of our dressing rooms to steal a shirt from the previous challenge in order to blend in with the crew. As you can see, he is so below average in appearance that he would blend into the crowd since no one would want to look at him directly." The intern blinks. "He stole gloves and hedge clippers to enact his revenge, once Chris let his guard down…"

Chris glares at the officers. "More like Chris’ guards let him down." The officers whistle innocently.

"He cut the light down, almost crushing Chris as an act of revenge," Patsy explains.

Zane leans in and whispers to Esme, "Who are we rooting for here?"

Quimberly holds a hand to her chin. She recalls, "Now that you mention it, there have been some odd goings on. Like that falling sign, and those bags getting slashed…"

"That was this guy, too?" Blair asks with wide eyes. Patsy smirks.

Douglas enters the room in a white shirt and red kilt. He apologizes, "I’m sorry I’m in me civvies. I got here as soon as I could. Where’s the culprit?"

Chris instructs, as he points at the intern still being held up by Anders, "There he is. I expect corporal punishment!"

The red haired intern yells out, "Curses!"

Patsy pauses. She looks over at the intern. "Aren’t you going to say something like ‘I would have gotten away with it, too, if it wasn’t for you meddling something or others’?"

"Nah," the former intern responds, still snarling. "I’m at peace with it." Douglas and his fellow officers leave the area with the culprit.

Patsy frowns. "Well, that was anticlimactic." A coy glimmer comes across Patsy’s face. "Or is it?" She points up to Dirk, still hanging from the rope, his eyes crossed.

"Didn’t that guy do that, too?" Tamira asks. Patsy smirks as she shakes her head. "Follow me." The others look at each other with curious expressions, before following after the red haired sleuth.

Dirk calls out, "Hey! Are you guys going to help me down?"

They are led to The Black Swans’ cabin. Patsy looks around the room with everyone, but Dirk, behind her. "What are we doing here?" Grace asks.

Patsy looks over at one of the bunk beds. She smirks, as she turns to the others. "The intern wasn’t the only one sabotaging the show, I’m kind of glad, since that would have been kind of a let down."

"It would have?" Blair asks.

Patsy responds with a nod. "A one off character that nobody remembers being the cause of turmoil? I mean, I do it in my stories all the time, but the best bestsellers always feature a well known side character who is really behind the mayhem."

"What are you suggesting?" Jerome asks, again with a raised eyebrow.

Patsy explains, "There’s someone here with a motive that goes beyond most of our comprehension." The others look her way. "Revenge."

"Wasn’t that the lest fellers deal?" Luke asks.

Patsy shrugs. "That was kid’s stuff. The motive here was a long lasting, festering hatred for what happened on the contestant’s last season. There is someone present who wants this season to be a complete failure."

"Who?" Esme asks.

Patsy smirks and points forward. The others follow her outstretched finger and gasp. Jerome reacts in surprise, "Zane?!"

Zane begins to sweat. He asks, "Me? Why would I…”

Patsy responds, "Er… I was pointing to the person standing behind you."

Blair shifts her eyes to the side and says, "Awkwaaaard."

Everyone turns to see someone with a cap, coveralls, and mustache behind Zane turning toward the exit. Zoe rushes and tackles the figure to the floor. Zoe stands up with the suspect and removes their cap. The others gasp.

Jerome rolls his eyes. He states, "Just another rando."

Patsy walks up to the person, as Zoe holds them still, and shakes her head. She smirks before ripping off the suspect’s fake mustache. "Almost always, the obvious answer is the correct answer."

The others present gasp. Blair states, "Wait. That’s Hae Won?"

Patsy nods. "She was fortunate with the misdirect, earlier, with the intern, but she wasn’t counting on my being on the case."

Hae Won insists, "I don’t know what this is about."

Patsy shakes her head, her lip still curled up on the side. "Let’s go back to the night of the gameshow challenge. Who had the motive to target Quimberly and LeVar?" Cary has a blank look on his face.

"You did have an argument with Quimberly," Brent recalls, directed toward Hae Won.

Hae Won assures, "But we made up."

"All for show," Patsy suggests raising her hands dramatically.

"And with LeVar, you were always talking smack about him," Grace adds.

Hae Won responds, "He just gave me bad vibes. He doesn’t have the best reputation. I was just warning you about him, as a friend." Evan solemnly looks to the side. Patsy catches his expression and frowns.

Herman asks, looking surprised, "Wait. What doth this hath to do with LeVar?"

Grace explains, "We found evidence of glue on his shirt’s sleeve."

"So it was sabotage?" Herman looks down at the floor.

"Wait," Cary states. "Did LeVar actually hit me?"

Patsy explains, "It’s my hypothesis that while he did hit you, it was not on purpose. As he struggled to free his hand from the podium, the sheer force and momentum of his freeing himself made maximum impact with Cary’s mug. Keep in mind that this is merely a theory."

Hae Won states, "You don’t have any evidence that I was involved in any of that." She commands, as she looks back at Zoe. "Let go of me." Zoe complies.

Patsy snaps her fingers. "Luke, my boy. Look under the bed over there."

Blair puts a hand over her mouth as she leans toward Cary, "That’s Hae Won’s bed." Cary looks concerned. Luke stoops down and pulls out a large suitcase.

Hae Won asks, "What’s that?"

Patsy smiles and states, "You know full well." Patsy turns toward the others. "Did anyone notice something odd about today’s challenge?"

Evan looks down at Reginald’s small trunks. He clears his throat as he looks to the side and states, "Uh. Besides the parade of himbos? No?"

Patsy smiles. "You actually have it exactly right. It’s as plain as the face on that guy." She gestures at Brent, who looks generally disinterested. Patsy opens the suitcase. The others gasp dramatically, again.

Esme reaches into the suitcase and pulls out a roll of fabric. She blinks. "Wait. This is…"

Patsy dramatically announces, "I heard a comment from the other team that they were not provided an equal amount of fabric to the women. I’m sure most of us assumed Esme was behind it." Esme looks blankly at Patsy as others nod. "But it was more of Hae Won’s sabotage."

"What?" Hae Won interjects. "I didn’t do that. Somebody planted that there to frame me.”

Patsy turns to Hae Won and asks, "What’s with the disguise?"

"This?" Hae Won asks, looking nervous. She replies, "I, uh…" She looks down. "I admit it. I was the one that gave the elaborately planned wedgie to Dirk."

Blair begins clapping. Some of the others glance at her. Blair observes, "I guess this isn’t the time?"

Hae Won insists, "But the rest... That wasn’t me! I’m being so serious, right now." Patsy furrows her brow as she looks over at Evan who gives her a reassuring nod.

Chris shrugs his shoulders. He states, "While things seem fairly obvious, we really don’t have enough evidence. The men still will have to attend the campfire ceremony, so…."

Esme interrupts, "Actually… Mr. McLean, sir." She points down to the clipboard. "According to the challenge rules, the opposing team was not allowed to interfere with their opponents. And clearly Hae Won took this extra fabric. So…"

"The Raging Bulls won the challenge?" Jerome asks. Esme nods. The guys cheer. Luke approaches Jerome for a hug. Jerome puts up a finger and states. "Uh uh, boo. Come find me after you put some clothes on." Luke looks down. He looks back up with a goofy, embarrassed grin.

Chris waves his hand and says, "It doesn’t matter much to me. Ladies, I’ll see you in five minutes. I’m going to go press charges on that ex-intern." Chris exits the room as others also follow him.

Tamira turns toward her bed. A camera catches a book sliding into her feet. Her eyes get wide as she frowns and looks down. She bends down and picks it up, and opens it to the pages with the fabric bookmark between. She looks at it with a raised eyebrow.

At the elimination ceremony, Chris announces, "This will be fairly straightforward, so let’s begin. Quimberly, Ruth, Grace, Tamira, Zoe, and Patsy, here are your marshmallows. That leaves Blair and Hae Won." Chris lifts the last marshmallow. "This goes to…"

"Blair." Blair gets up and takes her marshmallow from Chris.

Hae Won protests, "You all made a big mistake. I’m not leaving this spot." She remains on her stump. Chris gestures with his neck. The pair of burly interns walk over and lift Hae Won from her seat. They drag her to The Boat of Losers as she yells some muffled presumed insults the entire way.

Patsy claps her hands together. She claims, "Looks like my work here is done."

Chris turns to the contestants. He announces, "That was not exactly a surprise, but this might be."

"What are you getting at, Chris?" Grace asks.

Chris smiles. He holds up a second tray of marshmallows with six new marshmallows on it. He explains, "You ladies have had the misfortune of losing on the night of a double elimination. I mean, with so many cast members returning, we have to cut more than one of you on occasion."

Grace shakes her head with a hand placed on her forehead. "Maybe don’t bring contestants back?"

Chris seems to ignore the comment. He instructs, "You all will return to place your votes for the second elimination. I’ll be waiting." The Black Swans leave the campfire site in order to place their second votes.

After the contestants return, Chris holds up the tray of marshmallows. He tosses the first one and announces, "The first marshmallow goes to Quimberly." The marshmallow whizzes past her head. She quickly puts up two fingers and catches the marshmallow mid air. "Next up are Ruth, Grace, Zoe, and… Blair." Patsy and Tamira look at each other with wide eyes. Chris states, "The final marshmallow belongs to…"

"Tamira." Tamira looks relieved as she catches her marshmallow. She does look over at Patsy and frowns. She quickly looks away after Patsy catches her glance.

Patsy stands up and looks down. "Uh. Sorry, Pats," Ruth says. "It was a tough decision, with short notice. We did kind of lose the challenge because of you."

"Yeah, what Ruth said," Zoe adds, as she glances over at the rainbow haired artist. "Maybe you could have exposed Hae Won later, or something?"

Blair shrugs. "I voted for you because you said your work here was done… so…" Blair awkwardly looks up at the sky.

Patsy turns to Tamira and Grace. She adds, "At least you two had my back…"

Grace assures, "Of course we did."

"Are you sure your trust wasn’t misplaced, Grace?" Tamira asks. She holds out the book she found, open to a specific section.

Grace looks down. She looks back up at Patsy, with her brow furrowed. "You suspected Tamira and I?"

Patsy asks in a panic, "Where did you get that?" She grabs her book back from Grace. "Of course not, but I couldn’t rule anyone out."

Tamira looks to the side, as Grace sighs. Grace comments, "Well, at least I thought it was good knowing you."

Patsy insists, "Ladies. You weren’t supposed to see that…"

Chris says, "Sorry, Patsy. I appreciated your investigation at least. You helped save my perfectly round butt."

Blair’s eyes widen. She asks, "Did you say she helped shave your butt?"

Chris ignores the comment. "It’s time for you to leave." Patsy sighs before she heads down to The Boat of Losers.

Chris faces the camera and announces, "That was definitely a Total Drama action packed episode of Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst! Now that we’re free from the interference, we’ll see what drama unfolds naturally from here. Tune in next time!"

On the boat, Patsy looks down. She says to herself, "I thought solving the mystery would feel better than that." On the other side of the boat, Hae Won looks away from Patsy, obviously looking upset. Patsy looks down at her notepad. She opens the book to where the bookmark was placed. Her eyes get wide. She asks Hae Won, "Did you write this?"

"If I were talking to you, I would tell you I didn’t," Hae Won states with a huff.

Patsy turns to the next page and reads aloud, "’Sorry. You were getting too close to the truth.’" Patsy’s eyes get wide. She looks up. She states, "I got played for a… patsy."

At a still challenge site, presumably slated for a future episode, a shadowy figure is visible stalking the area. He settles behind a staircase and pulls out a hacksaw and begins sawing at one of the outer posts. Evan removes his cap, wipes his brow, and then places the cap back on his head. He continues sawing at the post with a smirk plastered on his face.

### Chapter 8 - A Bridge Too Far

"Welcome back to another episode of Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst!" The smiling face of Total Drama excitedly states. "I’m your host, Chris McLean! On our previous, action packed episode, the trio of Patsy, Grace, and Tamira investigated an alleged saboteur. After threats made against me, and a failed attempt to injure yours truly, I single-handedly apprehended a bloodthirsty former employee. Thanks to me, the police were already on the scene to arrest the perp."

Zane, the lanky assistant host and former contestant leans in toward Esme, the other assistant host, and also a former contestant, and asks, "Wasn’t that our idea?"

Chris goes on, "But Patsy suspected someone else was behind the other cases of sabotage, and exposed Hae Won as the culprit, with her having stolen the men’s fabric for the challenge and pulling off the most atomic of wedgies on all around jerk, Dirk." Zane’s eyes get wide. "Hae Won was voted out, but in a surprise double elimination, Patsy too was eliminated. With the saboteur out of the picture, who will win the challenge and who will be voted out next on Total Drama: Worst of the Worst!"

After Chris leaves the area, Zane points behind himself and explains, "I gotta go. I forgot about Dirk."

Esme rolls her eyes. She replies, "I wish I could forget about the guy, but I was forced to include him in the cast for more diversity."

Zane blinks. He asks, "You needed more blond, blue eyed dudes? Hardly seems like an underrepresented demographic, but okay." Zane waves to a confused looking Esme as he steps away and states, "Later."

Walking back from the elimination ceremony, Tamira asks Grace, "Was I harsh?"

Grace shrugs and states, "Maybe a little."

Tamira puts a well manicured fingernail to her chin. "I suppose Patsy was always saying everyone was a suspect, but it still hurt that she suspected us, not to mention what she said in that notebook about my pores." Grace blinks.

A man in a bright pink shirt, with dark skin walks up to the two women. He states, "Ah, yes. Tamira. I finally have an opportunity to greet you. How have you been doing?"

Tamira turns her face to the side and quietly replies, "Uh… good."

The handsome man smiles and laughs heartily, "That is most pleasant to hear. You are probably wondering why I am present for the competition."

"Not really," Tamira responds as she looks to the side.

The man replies, "Chris had asked me to take some photographs of the challenge, earlier. I had a bit of trepidation to appear again, but recalled that you were competing, and that put me at ease."

"Uh-huh," Tamira responds. Grace looks at her with a raised eyebrow.

"Anyway, I must be going," the man states. "I need to upload these images. It was good seeing you."

Tamira nods and says, "Uh-huh, whatever." The man waves, again, and walks away.

Grace asks, "What was that about?"

"What do you mean?" Tamira replies, as she instantly looks more comfortable.

"The way you treated that guy," Grace responds. "You were so rude, even though you obviously know each other."

Tamira replies, "Maybe I was a little brisk."

"A little brisk?" Grace reacts, her surprise evident. "I think an icicle is forming on the end of my nose."

"What do you care, anyway?" Tamira asks with her arms folded.

Grace looks aside and says, "I mean it would have only been polite of you to introduce us."

Tamira pauses for a moment. She shouts, "You like him?!"

Grace puts up her hands and pleads, "Keep it down."

Tamira adds, "I thought you liked LeVar."

"LeVar and I were just friends," Grace responds. "Besides, we barely had any time out here together."

Tamira shakes her head. "It’s not like I know Is… this new guy, but he seemed like someone you shouldn’t get involved with."

Grace laughs. She says, "Good one. That was the most polite guy I’ve ever seen in person. I’m telling you. I’m through with bad boys.”

Tamira is shown in confessional. She has a hand over her face. She says, "I can’t believe Isaiah is here. And the fact that Grace wants to get with my cousin…" She looks to the side. "With my cousin-in-law, really. He knows all about Toby’s choice of career… I mean, when you are that good of a dancer, the career really chooses you… But anyway… It’s not that I am ashamed, as I’ve said before, but some people can be v judgmental."

A tall, lean figure enters the site of the fashion show challenge, their silhouette visible under the doorway. He flicks up a light switch revealing himself as Zane. He looks up to see Dirk still hanging from the ceiling by his underpants, fast asleep. Zane stifles a laugh, but wakes up Dirk in the process. Dirk looks down and frowns, "I’m glad you’re getting your rocks off at my expense."

Zane smirks and asks, "Do you see anyone else back to help you?"

Dirk glares to the side and replies, "Yeah. Thanks, or whatever…"

Zane nods. He heads over to the opposite end of the rope and states, "I’m going to lower you now."

"Are you sure your skinny twig arms can handle all of this?" Dirk asks, still suspended.

"I’m stronger than I look," Zane assures. He begins lowering the rope by hand, and quickly loses his grip. Dirk plummets to the floor and lands flat on his face. He lets out a groan. Zane grimaces. He states, "Uh. My bad. The rope slipped."

Dirk mutters, "Just like how my foot is about slip right up your…" Dirk pauses as he stands. His face red from impact. "Hey… Thanks," Dirk states audibly, looking to the side.

Zane lowers his hands from a defensive pose. He looks a little confused and replies, "Yeah. No problem. I was just expecting a tongue lashing, or some form of assault."

Dirk forces a smile and replies, "That’s the old Dirk." He puts his hands down and rubs his own rear end.

Zane places a hand on his chin. He looks down and suggests, "You were up there for a while. You might want to get that checked out by that nurse guy."

Dirk replies, "Nah, I don’t want to bother him with something like…" Dirk pauses, as he rubs his own behind. "Actually… That’s not a bad idea." Dirk blushes a little, and smirks.

Zane nods. He puts a hand over his mouth and adds, "But just as a heads up, I think he might be a… you know. Not that it bothers me, or anything." Dirk blinks. "Anyway, I don’t want to be accused of intermeddling, or something, so I’m going to head back to headquarters. Nice seeing you, man." Zane points his index fingers at his friend.

Dirk nods and says, "Same. Thanks, again." Dirk struggles as he walks out of the fashion show set with his legs widely spread apart, wincing with each step.

Quietly sitting on a rock on the beach, Cary pulls his legs closer to himself. He looks down at the water, with a hand against his face, as he hears some stomping nearing him. He begins shaking before falling off of his rock. He looks up with wide eyes at an outstretched hand. Anders states, "Ah. If it’s not Care-Bear."

"Oh, hey, Anders," Cary replies with a wide smile, still wearing his face paint from the previous challenge. "What are you doing out here?"

"Anders has found running on the sand provides a resistance for maximum physical results," Anders responds. "What about you? Excuse me." Anders begins doing push ups in front of Cary. Cary looks on with wide eyes. "Go on."

"Oh, right," Cary replies. "I guess… I still feel an energy from some of the other guys about me… that I make them uncomfortable. I’m giving them a little space."

Anders smiles wide. He assures, "Excuse me for bluntness, but as Francesca always says avoidance of problems is no way to solve them."

"Francesca? Is that your…"

Anders asks, "Is this about Herman and Brent?" Cary’s eyes get wide.

Cary responds, "I suppose the issue is more with Brent… Even though we haven’t spoken about it, I can sense that Herman has let go of his resentment. I still hate myself for how I treated him… And don’t ask how I know, I just do…" Cary looks to the side. "Thank you for your input, but I’d rather not force the issue if it brings up traumatic memories for the other guys."

Anders frowns. "Maybe things are different from home country…" Anders shakes his head. "Are you open to help me with me workout?"

"Sure," Cary replies, still with a forced smile. "Do you need a spotter? I should warn you that I can only lift about a medium package of cat food…" Anders lifts Cary off of the rock and tucks him under his arm. "What are you…" Anders runs at full speed toward the Raging Bulls’ team’s cabin.

Anders bursts through the door. The other men look stunned. A cucumber falls off of a shocked Jerome’s eye. "Boo, what is…" Jerome begins. Anders lunges toward Brent and tucks him under his open arm. He then runs back out into the night carrying both Cary and Brent with him.

With the door still open to the runway challenge building, a menacing, slim figure stands beneath the doorway, wearing a ski mask and holding a baseball bat. He looks up and frowns. "Aw, man. He got down." He turns around and dejectedly exits into the night.

The scene turns to Ruth walking in the dark holding a backpack full of something. Zoe jogs past her, and then pauses for a moment. She runs back to Ruth. Zoe comments, "It looks like you have the right idea, walking with a weight on your back. Doing some strength training?"

Ruth looks back and then forward at Zoe. She reacts, "I’m glad you’re here."

"You are?" Zoe asks, looking a little flustered. "I’m glad you’re…"

Ruth explains, "I was gathering some materials for an art project. My creative juices have started flowing after that sewing challenge..." Ruth points to a nearby tree. "I have another bag, but I’m not strong enough to carry it myself. I was hoping someone else would show up so I wouldn’t have to take two trips."

"Oh," Zoe responds with slight sigh. She smiles. "I would be happy to help." Zoe picks up the other bag and puts it on her back. The two women begin walking together. Zoe adds, "This is nothing for me. If it would help, I could take your bag, t…" Zoe gets tossed Ruth’s bag, as her eyes widen with a jolt.

"Gee, thanks," Ruth responds. She pokes her own midsection. "I’ve been getting kind of soft around the middle lately."

Zoe stares aimlessly. "You look great, but… I wouldn’t want you to deprive yourself of some exercise…"

Ruth admits, "Seeing how strong you looked during the fashion show… That was really inspiring. You make it seem effortless."

Zoe smiles softly. She assures, "These two bags are nothing." She turns around. "I can even run without looking where I’m headed." Ruth laughs as she looks on. Anders runs by with his two team members under his arms. Ruth looks after them. She asks, "What is their deal?"

Zoe’s eyes are wide. She replies, "I’m not sure but I am definitely feeling motivated." She eyes up Ruth before picking her up and throwing her over her shoulder and running toward their destination.

Ruth begins shouting, "Hold up! Hold it!" The scene stops at that very moment.

The camera pulls away from a television screen, as two officers, a strong looking First Nation man and a petite blonde woman are seen conversing. The woman explains, "We can pause here for a moment, Darryl." She sets down the remote control.

Darryl responds, "Aw. It was just getting interesting, eh. I love the gushy stuff."

The woman blinks. She replies, "As my senior officer, I know I don’t need to remind you that we are looking into a very important incident. Now… I just got back from evidence. Officer Butt…" Darryl giggles to himself. The woman reacts with a pause. She continues, "Officer Butt was kind enough to write time stamps for us from the episode in question."

"That’s terrific, Cheryl," Darryl replies. "I hope we weren’t ‘butting in’ to his other duties." Darryl stifles a laugh as he slams his hand down on the table to contain his amusement.

Cheryl replies, "This is a very serious investigation."

"Oh, come on," Darryl replies. "You know he’s used to being… the butt… of jokes." Darryl can no longer contain his laughter. He falls to the floor.

Cheryl holds up an evidence bag. "He also…"

"He who?" Darryl asks as he stand back up and puts his chair back in place, with a smirk on his face.

Cheryl sighs. She replies, "Officer Butt…" Darryl laughs uncontrollably. Cheryl sighs. "If we can get serious, again." Darryl sits properly in his chair as he seems to have regained his composure. "As I was saying…" Cheryl holds up the evidence bag. On the inside is a flip phone. She explains, "It seems that our suspect had taken videos while out on the island chronicling his plot. It is suspected that he planned to post these videos online after returning from filming as some sort of bizarre web series."

"Ah, yes," Darryl replies. "A vlog, as the kids say. It’s short for video…"

Cheryl quips, "I know what it stands for. I’m ten years your junior…" Darryl frowns as he looks back at his partner. "Sir." Darryl nods. "Moving on. The time stamps provided by… you know who… correspond to each video recorded by the flip phone." Cheryl takes out her reading glasses to look at a sheet of paper in front of her.

"You know," Darryl replies as he leans back in his chair. "My eyesight is perfect like an eagle. Not bad for a guy ten years your senior, eh, cadet?"

Cheryl glares at her partner. She continues, "In watching the scenes along with the video evidence, we might be able to make some leeway in this case."

"Sounds good," Darryl replies. "I hope there are plenty of scenes with kissing. Those are my favorite."

Cheryl shakes her head. "The first time stamp…" she looks up at the screen. "It appears you’ve past it already." She rewinds the episode on the screen. Cheryl has placed a laptop on the table in front of her and Darryl, and prepares it to display the videos from the flip phone. The scene of the masked figure entering the fashion show building replays. "Here. That must be our perp."

Cheryl plays the first video from the flip phone. A slender man appears on the screen. He pulls off his ski mask, revealing himself as Evan.

Darryl states as he points to the laptop, "Hey, that’s the snowboard kid."

"Skateboard," Cheryl corrects as she refers to her notes. "But it doesn’t matter. Now quiet down… Sir."

Evan clears his throat, and then takes a deep breath. He introduces, "Hey, all my dudes and ladies, especially the ladies. It’s ya boy, Evan11. This is my first video in a series about how I hacked Total Drama. It’s called ‘Bruh! Nice!’" Evan pauses. He mutters to himself, "Insert title graphic here…" He then smiles for the camera again. "I pocketed this sweet flip phone from Freddie Flanderbilt. Yeah. We’re on a first name basis. It’s not a big deal." Evan holds the pilfered phone from another angle. "I didn’t think of it at the time, but I figured I might as well use this baby to film my righteous exploits. Camera phones are never going to get better than this! Anyways… I targeted some really random people prior to this. But we’ll talk about the next mark, Dirk."

Darryl leans over and whispers, "That’s the blond jock guy that hates women. We found out he was gay last episode and smooching all over one of the nurses." Cheryl glares at Darryl. "What? I rewatched the season up to this point for research purposes."

Evan goes on, "I know it might have seemed like Dirk might have made sense to have been one of my earlier targets with how much of an a-hole he is…" Evan mutters to himself, "I’m pretty sure I can say ‘a-hole’ without getting flagged for profanity…" Evan coughs to clear his throat. "But that would have been way too obvs. Everyone would have suspected me if I targeted him sooner on, and that would not have been lit." Evan forms his free hand into a ‘rock on’ symbol. Evan cracks his neck. "But now is the time. Bruh! Nice!"

The video on the laptop stops, frozen on Evan’s face, his tongue protruding and his fingers in a ‘rock on’ symbol. Cheryl points to the screen and explains, "That is the face of a criminal mastermind."

"That right there?" Darryl asks. He looks blankly as his lower lip sticks out a little. He blinks. "I could go for some popcorn while we watch this, eh?"

Cheryl shakes her head and sighs. "Fine." She replies, "I’ll go get some water and some chips."

"Bring me back some of those Sour Cream and Radish chips I’ve been hearing so much about, there," Darryl requests.

Cheryl agrees, "Fine. Just be ready with the next time stamp before I get back." As she leaves, Darryl leans back in his chair as he makes sure she is out of sight. He sits back straight before fast forwarding to where he left off on the episode.

The camera goes back to the episode. Zoe says, "… but it is motivating." She eyes up Ruth before picking her up and throwing her over the shoulder and running toward their destination.

Ruth begins shouting, "Hold up! Hold it!"

As Anders runs while carrying Cary and Brent, Brent asks, not sounding particularly invested either way, "What is the point of this?"

Anders explains, "Francesca always said sometimes reconciliation needs to be enforced."

"She always said that?" Cary asks. Anders nods. "I guess he wants you and I to work things out, but don’t feel obligated."

Brent looks to the side. He replies, "I don’t hold any resentment toward you."

Cary smiles and says, "I’m happy to hear that."

Brent winces. He states, "Could you… stop that?"

Cary blinks. "Stop what?"

"That constant positivity act," Brent states still in a monotone. "Nobody is that agreeable all the time."

"I didn’t know it bothered you," Cary responds.

Brent frowns. He looks aside. "Maybe I do resent you a little."

Cary states with a smile, "And that’s totally okay."

Brent replies, "No… It’s not."

"Actually," Anders adds, not seeming out of breath from his continued running, "Francesca says that we should forgive even if other person…"

Brent states, "So… when LeVar pranked you earlier, I could have prevented it… And I chose not to."

Cary shrugs. He assures, "Don’t beat yourself up over that."

Brent holds his head down. "The thing is… I know I come across as not letting things bother me, but that moment showed me that I really hadn’t gotten past our time in Reality."

Anders looks confused. "Are we not in reality presently? Your language still confuses Anders."

Brent goes on, "The whole experience just kept replaying in my mind over and over ever since it happened. Along with that, so did the hurt… And the way things ended with Melinda…" Brent appears to be choked up. Anders frowns.

"Let it out," Cary instructs. "I’ve found that crying can be cathartic."

Brent assures, "It’s not that. I think I swallowed a bug…"

Cary responds, "I know I can’t apologize enough for how I acted. I also know that it isn’t excusable…"

Brent assures, "I know you’re really sorry… I just didn’t want to face the situation, or admit that my memory of you was no longer who you are now." Brent lets out a sigh. "All is forgiven."

Anders’ eyes sparkle. "Aw. Friendship truly is magic, ja?" Anders stops running and sets the guys down.

Cary adds, "That memory of yours is truly impressive."

"It is most photogenic," Anders states. The other two look at him blankly.

Brent puts a hand at the back of his head. He replies, "Yeah… I’ve heard that before. It’s nothing special." He adds, "I’m going to head to the confessional. I’ll see you guys back at the cabin." Anders and Cary nod and wave as he walks away.

Cary turns to Anders and says, "Thanks for doing that. You didn’t have to."

Anders responds, "It was my pleasure."

Cary begins walking away. He pauses. He turns back to Anders. "Is everything alright?"

Anders head reels back, a little. He replies, "Ja. All is good. Why do you ask?"

Cary shakes his head. He admits, "It’s just a feeling like something is bothering you." He softly laughs. "I’m probably wrong."

Anders looks to the side. He insists, "Ja. Anders is as happy as can be." He forces a smile. "Anyway… Anders should go hydrate. It is very healthy. Goodbye to you." Anders awkwardly rushes off into the night. Cary looks after him with a raised eyebrow.

As Officer Cheryl begins to open the door, Darryl fumbles around with the remote control before pausing the episode. He casually leans back with a hand propping up his head from behind. Darryl assures, "I’m sorry, I…"

Cheryl holds up a piece of paper after setting down drinks and snacks. She looks up at the screen. "This is exactly the next moment listed among the time stamps." She laughs. "Here I thought you were going to slack off and watch the episode. I’m sorry for doubting you."

"It is?" Darryl asks with his lips sticking out unnaturally. He smiles and raises his brow. "Of course it is, eh. You should have a little more faith in me." Cheryl nods. She sets up the next video on the laptop. She explains, "I guess it was cut out of the episode, or there was no footage, but…" She points at the screen. "Notice how the… the tall guy with the orange and red checked shirt is emerging from the construction area?"

"Luke," Darryl clarifies. "Yeah. I see him on the screen there."

"It appears that he and the suspect were friends. And the suspect was seen going into this work area, earlier, but there were supposedly no cameras to capture his actions back there. He seemed very aware of where the cameras were… Anyway… back to Luke. It’s a possibility that he was a coconspirator…" Cheryl suggests.

Darryl responds, "Nah-uh! Luke is a good old boy. Never meaning no harm…" Cheryl looks at him blankly. Darryl shifts his eyes to the side. "Or so I’ve heard."

"The next video should clear things up," Cheryl states. "Let’s begin." Darryl begins the video on the laptop.

Evan is on screen, as he appears to have propped up the phone to film himself hands free.  He gets himself in position, leaning on a hatchet on a stump, his other hand on his hip. He smiles, and announces, "Welcome back to ‘Bruh! Nice!’ I’m ya boy, Evan11 back with another vid on how I hacked Total Drama." He holds up the hatchet and swings it through the air. "Hacked… Get It?" He laughs at himself, before coughing. He frowns. "It’s not a big deal. I’ll just edit that portion out. Moving on." He clears his throat. "You may be wondering how I made it this far on this season. I was given the chance of a lifetime to return, and I was not about to be out first. Thing is… I’m not as strong as I once was." He points at himself with his thumbs. "Ya boy is still a king, tho." He laughs. "So I did a little… maneuvering to fabricate some reasons for other players to be voted out before me." He counts on his hand. "I started with Blair, who seemed like an easy target. Can you believe she’s still here? Wild. Anyway, I started making my targets more random, so as to escape detection. Some on the guys team… some on the ladies team… Results did vary." Evan begins swinging the hatchet, hitting a staircase, presumably for a challenge. "But this is going to be a sure fire success." He swings the hatchet again. He wipes his brow. "You see…"

"Evan? Is that you?" Luke calls out as he approaches. He looks around. "What are you doing back here, pard? Where did you get a hatchet?"

Evan says, "Uh. The crew said they needed help demolishing this… structure. I couldn’t say no."

Luke laughs. "It was one of those lady interns, huh?"

Evan forces a quiet laugh. He replies, "You know me."

Luke pauses as he looks at the staircase. He looks back at a nervous looking Evan. "Let me see your form."

Evan smiles. He replies, "If you say so, bro." He begins swinging the hatchet, again. Luke lets out a hearty laugh. Evan looks at him.

"Hand me that," Luke requests, as he holds a hand out. Evan reluctantly gives Luke the hatchet. "You wanna chop with this little fella at an angle." Luke swings the hatchet at a stump. "That’s gonna get you the best results." He holds the hatchet back toward Evan. "Go ahead and give ‘er another go."

Evan nods as he takes the hatchet back. He swings at the stump, again. "Is that any better?" Luke laughs, again. Evan frowns.

"Here, buddy," Luke replies. "Let me show you, more hands on." Luke stands behind Evan, pressing against his back as he places his arms around Evan’s. Luke places his hands over Evan’s hands as he instructs him. "Try it at more of a downward angle." Luke leads Evan as he makes contact with the staircase with the hatchet. Luke laughs. "There you go, buddy. Let’s try it one more time." The guys swing the hatchet another time. Luke steps back and slaps Evan’s butt. He states, "I think you got it, pal." Luke looks over. "Golly. I wish I could help, but I gotta head over to the medical tent before it gets too late. Stay safe, bud." Luke exits the area.

Evan stands in place for a few moments. He sets down the hatchet. He turns toward the camera, his face a deep, deep shade of red. He looks embarrassed as he says, "I’ll need to edit that out." He approaches the camera before turning it off.

Cheryl and Darryl look blankly at the screen as the video ends. Darryl looks over at a blushing Cheryl. He smirks, as he says, "Interesting video, eh?"

Cheryl clears her throat. She assures, "It’s just a little warm in here."

Darryl looks over at the thermostat, turns back, and responds, "Uh huh."

Cheryl explains, "There’s another video attached to this time stamp. Let’s get right to that."

Evan states, sitting huddled on the ground in front of a fence, on the laptop, "I need a little break. Luke, my dude… I don’t want you considered an accomplice or anything. You’re a good dude. Strong. Solid like a skyscraper… Eyes like deep pools of the crystal blue fountain waters at a Las Vegas hotel… And that torso…" Evan trails off. His face slightly red, again. "I really need a girlfriend… Anyway… Kind of reminded me of the situation with my main man, Skylar. I’m glad I was able to protect him by voting him out before things get more h-core, but…" Evan sits back, holding his knees with his arms. He looks to the side. "I appreciate that he covered for me when I was feeling weak, but… he has that knowledge… I didn’t want to risk anyone else knowing just how frail I’ve gotten.” He taps his cap with his index finger. "Besides… It cast less suspicion on me being the ‘saboteur’, as Patsy put it, by taking out my closest friend." Evan extends his arms and smiles. "Pretty smart, huh? Sorry, bro. Maybe it coulda been different, but…" Evan looks to the side. "He had to go and rescue Quimberly when I had the perfect opportunity to take her out." Evan furrows his brow as he looks to the other side. "She’s my biggest competition. I don’t know if I’ll ever have another chance to take her out. Yeah she’s hot, but…" He pauses, as he looks at the camera phone. "What was I talking about, again?" He shrugs. He approaches the phone with his hand. The video ends.

Cheryl scratches her head. "I wonder who that Skylar is…"

"He was voted out a couple episodes back, there," Darryl explains. He puts a hand under his chin. "So Patsy was right after all."

"About?" Cheryl asks.

"You see," Darryl begins, "Skylar was involved in this accident on his first season where he fell down a pit. Evan more or less passed the guy a note this season reminding him of the incident. The poor guy had a panic attack and couldn’t finish the challenge, and he got voted out. Pretty brutal way to go out."

Cheryl nods. "As much as this Evan guy tries to pass himself off as justifiable, he doesn’t seem to have any problem with hurting people." She raises the remote for the television. She begins playing the episode.

Brent is shown in confessional. He admits, "I’m so glad to have had that conversation with Cary. I already feel the benefit of letting…"

Darryl seems invested, as Cheryl begins fast forwarding through the confessional. Darryl pouts. Cheryl comments as the episode continues to fast forward. "Wow. The guy in green sure is a talker."

She hits play. Brent continues, "Dealing with the ideals of what being a true man involves has always weighed heavily on my…" Cheryl begins fast forwarding some more. She hits play. "And so I had to admit to Melinda that I had…" Cheryl begins fast forwarding, again. Darryl looks disappointed. She hits play. "… guess that my being average has always served as a weird sort of protection for me." Darryl tosses a crumpled piece of paper at a wall. Cheryl looks over at it. Brent continues. "You know? Like then people wouldn’t expect much from me." Brent sighs. "But now all I want is to do better than average this season. I feel like I have so much to prove. Not just to others, but to my…" Cheryl begins fast forwarding some more. Darryl throws his head back.

Cheryl says, "Here." She presses play. "Notice Evan in the background here?" Darryl frowns but nods.

Cary is sitting next to Anders in their cabin. Evan is seen in the background rummaging through his bags. Cary asks, "I understand that you don’t want to talk, but just know that I am here for you if you change your mind."

Anders assures, "Anders is just a simple guy. I know some people deal with difficult problems, but I can just go with flow, as you say, ja?"

Cary looks down. He says quietly, "I wish I could believe you."

Watching the scene, Cheryl holds her head up with her arm as she states, "I wish that guy wasn’t so huge so we could have a better look at what Evan was doing." She points to the screen, and turns to Darryl. "Did he just pull out a knife?" The scene continues to show Evan pulling out a pen and paper. "Oh!" Cheryl shouts. She fast forwards the episode.

Esme is shown outside in the morning, writing on her clipboard. Evan walks up to her from behind and says, "Yo." Esme jumps, before turning around.

Esme smiles and says, "Oh, hi, Evan. I’m just getting everything prepared for the next challenge. You should probably go back to your..."

"You work so hard," Evan replies. "Chris doesn’t appreciate you nearly enough."

Esme shakes her head and responds, "Oh, no. He may not say it, but I know he notices my efforts."

Evan assures, "If it were me, I would be constantly showering you with praise."

"Oh, stop," Esme replies, as she blushes a little.

Evan shifts his gaze to the side. He admits, "Hey, I was just looking through my things, and it seems like Hae Won stole some of my clothes for some reason."

"Oh, no!" Esme responds, looking concerned. "I never trusted her from the start." Esme does a single head nod.

"Right. Right. So I was wondering if you could give me access to the costume wardrobe, just so I could get some new digs." Evan forces a smile.

Esme shakes her head. She replies, "Oh, no. I could never do that. I may have my favorites, but I could never show favoritism to a contestant. It could mean my job!"

Evan leans in closer to Esme’s ear. He insists, "It’ll be our little secret. Just between you and me. Besides... It’s just clothes. I don’t know if the networks would appreciate me running around naked…"

Esme looks sweaty. She fumbles through her key ring and removes a small key before handing it to Evan. "Be sure you get this back to me. I could get into some real trouble." Evan smiles and nods.

Darryl looks at Cheryl with wide eyes. She pauses the episode in order to play the next video.

Evan has a smirk plastered on his face. He states, "Welcome back to ‘Bruh! Nice!’" He puts his free hand into a rock on symbol and sticks his tongue out, exposing his tongue ring. "It’s ya boy, Evan11. Back for another Total… Drama… Hack!" He smiles. "You see what I did there?" Evan laughs. He holds up a piece of paper. "I snatched this bad boy from Chris’ journal. Makes tracing his handwriting easier. The dude really misses Chef Hatchet." Evan holds up a bag of purple and black fabric. He smiles. "Nobody thinks the sabotage is going to continue, so it’s important to make this one look like an accident… And thanks to my friend, Esme, I have exactly what I need to get back at Dirk. It’s also important to get that homophobe to sit out of the challenge, and I have just the thing." Evan slowly raises a light purple unitard with a wicked grin on his face.

Officer Darryl balances a pen on his lips. "What is he put to?" Cheryl asks. She looks over at Darryl.

Darryl shrugs his shoulders. "Don’t look at me."

Cheryl admits, "I read here that it’s necessary to view the challenge of the episode in its entirety."

"I wonder who wrote that," Darryl states with a smirk, and as he taps his fingers on the table.

Esme stands in front of a large structure that appears to look like a bridge. She welcomes the contestants, and states, "Hello, everyone! Welcome to your next challenge!” She holds up one of her hands theatrically and states, "Behold."

"Wowee," Blair states. "What a wonder in architecture. You know. I was working on my engineering degree in addition to English st…"

Cheryl fast forwards through Blair speaking.

"Everyone," Esme continues. "Each team will select who they consider their strongest contestant."

"What’s with the bridge?" Jerome asks.

Esme points at him and explains, "We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it." She laughs and snorts. No one reacts. She blushes and states, "No one?"

Evan smiles and assures, "I thought it was funny." Esme blushes before holding her clipboard over her face.

Dirk raises his hand and states, "Me, me. Pick me!" A concerned Evan looks over his shoulder. Dirk lifts his shirt. "Check out these abominables. My frat bros used to grate carrots on these babies."

"Uh, they are nice, but…" Reginald suggests, "Maybe we should select Anders. He seems like the safest choice without knowing what the challenge is."

Evan adds quickly, "I second that." The others, besides Dirk, nod. Dirk folds his arms and looks to the side.

Quimberly raises a hand. She asks, "The wind velocity is beginning to pick up. Do we really consider this challenge safe in these conditions?"

Esme licks a finger and sticks it in the air. She replies with a shrug, "It doesn’t really seem particularly windy, but if you think this challenge might be dangerous, we can switch to a back up."

Quimberly shakes her head. She states, “No, no. We’re doing the challenge." She rubs her hands together as the other look at her with raised eyebrows. "’I’m assuming that I was chosen as the strongest contestant."

Ruth speaks, "Actually. I was thinking we could choose Zoe. I mean, you’re a great choice and all, but this kind of is Zoe’s thing, and you’re just so… well rounded."

"So be it," Quimberly responds with a shrug.

Esme explains, "The challenge is simple. Each team will climb the stairs to a platform on the structure, one for each team. The contestant you chose as the strongest will carry their teammates from one side of the bridge to the other."

Anders says under his breath, "Not the first time Anders carries the weight of the squirrel on his shoulders…" Cary looks over at Anders in concern.

Esme goes on, "The fastest to complete the challenge will win invincibility for their team. The men will need to sit out…"

Zane runs up. He bends to hold his knees as he catches his breath. He states, "Oh, good... I’m not too late…" He holds up a bag. "I found these outside of headquarters."

Esme takes the bag. "There’s a note." She reads it quickly and then looks inside the bag. "It looks like Chris has added an extra element to this challenge. Each team will need to wear one of these ballet costumes."

"It’s a ballet challenge, now?" Reginald asks. "I admit that it’s not my forte, but it does share some similarities to the graceful art of fencing, which I must modestly say I am quite skilled at."

Dirk states, "Yeah. I dodged a bullet before. I’m sitting out."

"I hate to sit out, but I’m not feeling this one, either," Evan states with a shrug.

Luke places a hand on Evan’s shoulder, and states, "Gee, bud. I reckon you would be right perfect for this challenge, along with pipsqueak, Herman, bless his heart."

Evan responds, "No, I don’t think…"

Herman laughs and clutches his chest. "Thou woundest my heart. However… It logically doth make sense," Herman adds. "This doth be a challenge that favors the lighter players, outside of Anders role."

Luke adds, "Besides me to sit out, we should pick one of the other heavier fellers, like… Cary." Cary blinks.

"You…" Evan replies. He frowns. "No, we can’t have…"

Cheryl pauses the video. Darryl groans and states, "Aw, man. It was just gettin’ good, there."

Cheryl informs, "This is the next time stamp."

Darryl shrugs and acquiesces, "I’ll allow it."

Cheryl glares at him. "Thank you for your benevolence, sir."

"Ben, who now?" Darryl asks with a single blink. Cheryl begins playing the video.

Evan admits, recorded on his flip phone, "I forgot to mention… I need to be one of the players to sit out this time… That’s really important, just in case things go wrong… Not that they will. Bruh! Nice!" Evan stops smiling and looks to the side." I also need to be careful in drawing suspicion to myself. I mean, I wanted to keep Patsy and Hae Won around…" The thin man shrugs his shoulders. "But they were too smart for their own goods. They were nice to look at, but heck… My hormones have been raging so hard even that crazy intern guy was looking kinda cute…" Evan shakes his head and places a hand over his face before reaching out to the camera phone. The video ends.

Cheryl returns to the episode.

Reginald frowns, as he rubs the bridge of his upturned nose. He asks, "I apologize if I’m missing something, but I can’t comprehend what would be advantageous about you sitting out on this challenge." Reginald raises his hand. "I’m making the executive decision to…"

Evan’s eyes get wide. "Uh…" He begins coughing violently.

Luke looks up at the structure for the challenge as he scratches his head. He looks over at Evan. "Are you alright, pallie?" Luke asks, looking concerned. He places a hand on Evan’s back.

"What’s the problem?" Reginald asks with a raised eyebrow. "It might appear that our dear Evan is feigning sickness in order to get his way. Hm?"

Jerome nudges Reginald with his elbow. He says, "Henny, Evan really is sick." Reginald backs up a step. "Settle your biscuits, boo. It’s not anything contagious. He just had cancer at some point."

"It’s in remission," Evan assures. "I’m totally fine… But I do have my moments… If you want me to compete, though…" He coughs, again.

"No, no," Reginald assures, as he holds up his soft hands. "I simply was unaware of your predicament. My sincerest condolences." Reginald turns toward Esme and informs her, "Evan will also sit out of the challenge, along with Dirk and Luke." As Evan passes the camera on the way to the sit out bench, he winks directly toward it.

Cheryl pauses the episode in order to play the next video.

Evan insists, again recorded by the flip phone, "I never want to use my illness to my advantage." He puts a hand over his heart. "But I told myself that I am always willing to do anything to win this game." The video stops.

Cheryl turns to Darryl. She asks, "Did he really have cancer? I’m unfamiliar with his life before this incident."

Darryl nods and answers, "Oh, yeah. After all that, he just wasn’t the same athlete he was before. I once read on OMZ that he spent almost all of his money from his time as a pro skater in a matter of a couple years. I don’t know if he still expected the money to come in from his advertisements and endorsement deals, but those companies no longer had any interest in him. I also heard that his girlfriends also left him high and dry…"

"Girlfriends?" Cheryl repeats. Darryl nods.

"Oh, yeah, the guy is known to be a bit of a ladies’ man," Darryl states.

"That’s all very sad," Cheryl comments.

Darryl replies, "Gosh right it is, but he is not someone we should have too much sympathy for. He was able to manipulate a lot of people.”

Cheryl agrees with a nod, "You’re right."

"That’s the first time you’ve said that, cadet," Darryl states with a smirk.

Cheryl glares at her senior officer. She states, "I’m pressing play."

Cheryl presses play on the episode.

Esme nods. She looks at her clipboard, and then back up at the contestants. She counts the contestants competing on The Raging Bulls. She scratches her head with her pen, before making a check mark on her clipboard. "Alright, that’ll be everyone. You can go get changed."

The contestants return in their ballet outfits. Dirk points at Cary’s tight costume and snickers. Jerome places his hands on his hips. He states, "Nah-uh. There will be no body shaming. Not everyone is blessed with my body-ody-ody."

"Yeah," Blair adds. "Body shaming’s more Zoe’s thing." Most of the others laugh. Blair looks around at the others, surprised by their positive response.

Zoe places a hand on her opposite arm. Ruth assures, "I’m sure she had good intentions." Zoe smiles. "She knows every body is beautiful." Zoe blushes a little, as Ruth puts an arm around her.

"Yeah," Zoe adds, sheepishly.

Grace leans in toward Tamira and asks, "When did those two get so buddy buddy?" Tamira shakes her head in response.

Anders places a hand on the back of his head. He admits, "These tights are really snuggling Anders’ Netherlands, ja?" Dirk’s face is red as he avoids looking at Anders.

Evan looks over at Dirk with wide eyes. He asks, "What’s your problem? Can’t admit a man can be beautiful when you see…"

Luke points at Anders. He adds, "Golly. You’re not kiddin’ Anders." He nudges Evan. "Hey, Evan! I reckon his behind looks riper than a fresh picked Georgia peach in the month of July." Anders turns around. Evan buries his face in his hands.

Dirk folds his arms and looks to the side. He states, "Luke is too pure to be friends with the likes of you." Evan uncovers his face as he looks over at Dirk with an inquisitive look.

Esme announces, "The challenge is now underway! Zoe is already carrying Tamira across the bridge, while The Raging Bulls are in a huddle."

"Any ideas on how to win this?" Jerome asks.

Reginald places a hand under his chin. He suggests, "Let’s look at this logically. If Anders carries the lighter team members first, he might be winded by the time he gets to the heavier teammates. If we do the opposite, the lighter players will feel much lighter by comparison."

Anders states, "Sounds good to Anders." He picks up Jerome over his shoulder and bounds across the bridge.

Jerome protests, "No way am I one of the ‘heavier teammates’." He flails his arms and legs. As they reach the end of the bridge to their team’s platform, Jerome kicks off Anders glasses which fall on the bridge. Zoe passes by carrying Grace over her head, as Grace’s eyes are wide. Zoe unknowingly kicks Anders glasses from the bridge and they land next to Evan, Luke, and Dirk on the sit out bench. The three do not seem to notice.

Anders looks concerned as he looks about. He admits, "Jerome, my friend. Do you see where my glasses went?" He sets Jerome down.

Jerome looks around with his arms folded. He states, "Sorry, boo. I don’t see them on the bridge. I mean, your eyesight can’t be all that bad since you caught that bad dude last challenge."

Anders forces a smile and nods. He states, "I better keep a move on." As he makes his way back to the starting point he quietly says to himself, "He was the only one running…" Anders sighs as he continues. He stops at his team’s starting point. Reginald hops on his back and he turns to run back to the goal platform.

Reginald places his hands on Anders shoulders. He blinks, "Pardon my asking, but your shoulders are ever so tense. Is there anything the matter?"

Anders assures, "I have no thing the matter." Anders forces a smile. "Everything is hunky Dora in Anders’ life."

Reginald gives out a sigh of relief. He comments, "Good. Last time I had a heart to heart on this show it led to my downfall." Anders accidentally slams into the side rail, causing Reginald to fall from his shoulders and onto the bridge. The structure creaks, loudly. Evan smirks. "Hey! Watch it! Most precious of cargo here."

Anders apologizes, "Sorry, my man friend." Anders holds out his hand toward Zoe who keeps running past them.

Reginald blinks. He calls, "I’m right here." Anders nods and picks him back up.

On the sidelines, Evan asks Dirk, "What did you mean earlier that Luke was too pure for me? Was that some kind of dig at my moral character?"

"What moral character?" Dirk asks with an eye roll.

"Listen, I am tired of your crap," Evan states firmly. "You’ll get yours, just wait and see."

Luke puts a hand on both men’s shoulders. He assures, "Now fellas. We shouldn’t be feuding seeing as we’re on the same team. Now why don’t you kiss and make up."

Dirk pouts and looks to the side. "I’d rather put my lips on a lady." Luke and Evan blink.

Evan responds, "Wouldn’t we all." Luke looks at him. "Hey, why should I apologize to him? He has been a jerk since I stepped on that dock. I still have a splinter from him pushing me down."

"That was an accident," Dirk insists.

"Oh yeah?" Evan replies. "I don’t buy that."

"If it wasn’t," Dirk continues, "You wouldn’t have gotten back up."

Evan stands up. "That’s it. Get up. This ends, now."

Dirk stands and gets close to Evan. "Yeah, Bones?"

"Stop calling me that," Evan replies. He attempts to push Dirk, who doesn’t budge.

Dirk laughs. "What was that supposed to be?"

Evan’s face turns red. Luke steps in. He outstretches his arms. "Fellas, fellas. You’re both good guys deep down. Please just calm down before somebody gets real hurt." The bridge for the challenge continues to creak as the active players run across it. Luke turns to Dirk. "I thought you were trying to be a better man. Why not start here?" he whispers.

Dirk pauses. He looks down. He says quietly, "Uh, yeah… I forgot for a minute." He looks up at Evan. "Look, Evan. I’m s…"

Evan lunges toward Dirk. Dirk steps aside, as Evan misses him and falls to the ground. He groans as he holds his ankle. "I think I twisted it. This is your fault."

"My fault?" Dirk asks, looking to be in disbelief. "You’re the one that sprang at me with your wimpy chicken legs."

"Lots of women… like my legs," Evan assures, clearly winded.

Luke looks to be alarmed, after crouching next to Evan. He asserts, "Jeepers! Your ankle looks real bad like. Old Messie had to be put down after an injury like this, and hers looked mighty better ‘an that. I’m gonna go get help. You guys stay right here." He pauses. "And no more fightin’." Luke rushes off toward Esme, who is watching the challenge unfold.

Anders reaches his teams’ starting point. He assures, "I think we are doing well, ja?"

"You’re doing super," Cary assures with a smile.

Brent states, "But the other team is down to one last contestant." Blair waves at the guys.

Anders places a hand under his chin. His eyes light up. "Anders has got it!" He crouches down. "All three of you mens jump on Anders." He slaps his knees. "Come on. Jump on Anders.

"Pardon?" Herman asks, with a arched eyebrow. "Is that even allowedeth?"

Brent reflects, "Now that he mentions it. Esme didn’t say we had to go one person at a time."

Cary nervously laughs. "I believe in you, buddy," he says in Anders direction. He looks at Brent. "Can I talk to you for a moment?" Brent shrugs, looking generally disinterested. "Brent. You’re kidding me right now. You saw him drop Reginald, and he was just one guy."

Brent responds, still looking nonchalant, "I thought you were all about believing in people, now. Maybe I’m misremembering."

Cary looks down. He sighs. He turns to Anders. "Jeepers, Anders. I fully support you, and all, but are you sure you can do this?"

Anders eye twitches. He replies, "Ja. You all are depending on Anders. I will not let you down."

Cary gulps. He mumbles, "I sure hope not."

On the ground, the challenge structure can still be heard making a creaking sound. Evan looks up nervously. He turns toward Dirk. He says, "Hey, man. I’m sorry about earlier. If you could just carry me any place else, I would…"

Dirk shakes his head and says, "Can’t. Luke said not to. Besides. The body is weird, especially yours." Evan cringes. "One wrong move and it could be…" Dirk makes a grotesque snapping sound.

Evan looks back up at the bridge. He attempts to roll himself out of the way but does not have the strength. He looks at one of his arms, which is bruised badly. He begins sweating more profusely. "Look. Dirk! I’m begging you..."

"You know," Dirk replies. "I was about to apologize to you. And I meant it. I did feel bad for how I treated you, but every time you…" Dirk sighs. "I see right through your act."

"You do?" Evan asks, momentarily distracted.

Dirk nods. "Somethin’ ain’t right. You’re overcompensatin’ for somethin’.”

"Overcompensating?" Evan asks. He looks to the side. "I don’t know what you’re talking about."

"It’s a real word," Dirk insists. "My frat bro, Barry Franken, taught it to me. He was a psych major. He was always hanging out with Chocky, and ‘Boo’ Barry. We called him ‘Boo’ Barry to distinguish the two, and because he was always wearing a sheet over his head." Dirk lets out a slight laugh. "Funny guy. Never wore anything underneath it, though." The bridge continues to creak.

Evan states, "That’s all very interesting, but…"

"Dude, just chillax," Dirk replies. "Help is on the way. You’ll be in good hands with Nurse Bigby." Evan continues to looks nervous.

Anders runs with Herman, Cary, and Brent on his shoulders. Zoe looks impressed as she passes by Anders. She says, "Impressive." Her jaw remains slack. She reaches Blair. Zoe states, "I wish there were three of you right now."

Blair blushes. She replies, "Oh, you." Zoe heaves Blair over her shoulders.

Anders sprints across the bridge at an impressive speed. Brent calls out in a monotone, "Woo. Go Anders."

The guys sway back and forth in the air. The bridge creaks more. Cary asks nervously, "How sturdy is this structure?"

Zoe runs beside Anders with her brow furrowed. Both teams cheer for their team members. Anders picks up his pace, passing Zoe. He leaps forward with a mighty bound and lands on his team’s platform. He claps his hands above his head and calls, "Anders has won, ja?" Zoe runs next to him, with Blair on her shoulders.

Tamira winces. She states, "Um… Anders?" She points behind him. Anders turns to see Herman, Cary, and Brent sprawled along the bridge, not the platform, in varying stages of consciousness. Anders frowns.

Esme calls out with a megaphone, "The Black Swans win the challenge!" Luke reaches Esme. She turns her attention to him.

The women jump up and down in celebration of their victory. They look uneasy as the bridge begins to sway more dramatically. Several contestants grab on to the rails. Some start to panic. Zoe grabs hold of Ruth, and says, "If I go out like this… I’m going out with no regrets." She kisses the rainbow haired woman, who looks surprised.

Esme looks up in shock. She states into the megaphone, "Everyone get down from there at once!" They rush toward the stairway. The stairway, however, begins to break away from the rest of the bridge. Cary rolls and begins to fall from the side. He wakes just in time to see Brent grasping his arm as he keeps him from plummeting. Brent smiles at him, it being evident that he is trying to reassure him.

Evan looks up from the ground with wide eyes. Dirk looks behind himself. He states, "Crud…" He begins to sprint out of the way. He stops. Dirk looks down at Evan, and sighs. He rushes back to Evan and quickly rolls him out of the way. Dirk looks up, gulps, and covers his head with his arms.

Evan looks at Dirk. "You… saved me…" Suddenly, a strong wind blows Evan’s cap from his head. He looks at it, as he lies on his side on the ground. He looks up to see that the wind has changed the trajectory of the falling staircase. He blinks as he mutters, "Oh, sh…" The wooden staircase crashes down violently on the former skateboarder. Luke just arrives. He falls to his knees and puts his hands over his mouth.

Dirk rushes over to Evan, and begins picking up and throwing the boards away from him. He calls out, "Come on! We have to get him out from under there!"

Cheryl pauses the episode.

Cheryl looks down. Darryl states, "That was far more brutal than I was expecting." He looks down, too. "As bad as a guy he is… you hate to see something like that happen."

Cheryl adds, "At least we know he survived this." She looks at her records. "Not without a head injury, two broken arms, and a broken leg. Not to mention some cuts and abrasions." She points to the flip phone. "This was found near the site of this incident about a year later. It is suspected to have slid under a bush, and a family of squirrels scurried off with it, allegedly using it as an arm chair."

Darryl admits, "Hard to imagine what followed could happen this with him in this condition…"

Cheryl stands and stretches her arms in the air. She states, "I think that about covers this evidence. I’m going to head down to my desk."

Darryl nods. He states, "Leave the cleaning up to me. I’ll join you in a little while." Cheryl nods. She heads toward the exit. Darryl leans back in his chair as he watches her leave. He then sits back in his chair and presses play on the remote.

Crew members are shown propping ladders up against the bridge to help the contestants down. Anders is sitting on the ground with his head buried in his hands. Cary sits beside him and places a hand on his shoulder. Cary assures, "I just want to tell you that this isn’t your fault."

Anders begins, "That was exactly what Anders was thinking…" He lowers his head. "How could Anders be so stupid? So careless…" He wipes his eyes with his massive forearm. "I didn’t get strong for this competition…"

"Isn’t that what you said?" Cary ask.

"I started bodybuilding to keep Francesca…" Anders explains. "I couldn’t see what she could see in someone worthless… like Anders. I bulked up. She was concerned that I didn’t think she liked me for who I was, but how could she?" He lifts his head as he sobs. "Despite all that. I’m still just a bumbling… idiot." A somber Cary attempts to put his arm around Anders, but it only reaches part way. Cary begins sobbing, too.

Zoe awkwardly stands next to Ruth and Tamira. Zoe states, "Um… About earlier… I only did that because I thought we were dying. I know you have a girlfriend at home."

Ruth replies, "Oh, her? I just made that up for when I thought creeps and losers were hitting on me."

Tamira blinks. She says, "Didn’t you tell me about your girlfriend?" Ruth ignores Tamira as she takes Zoe’s hand in hers.

The medical staff, and other crew members, assist in removing Evan from the wreckage. Esme is speaking over a walkie talkie. She says, "Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Alright, sir. Thanks for the concern."

"What did Chris say?" Zane asks.

Esme shrugs. She states, "The show must go on."

Zane gestures toward the wreckage. "After all of this? You have to be kidding."

"He said worse accidents than this have happened on the show before," Esme explains. "He plans to cover it up to make it look like it isn’t our fault. We’ll medevac Evan to a hospital, and he wants us to find a past contestant to replace him."

"This is messed up," Zane says.

Esme assures, "I know, but… What choice do we have?" Zane looks down at the ground.

At the campfire ceremony, The Raging Bulls are gathered in the seats around Chris. "Are we really doing this, right now?" Jerome asks.

Chris smiles and says, "You bet ya. We’ll keep it brief." He tosses out marshmallows. "Luke, Reginald, Jerome, Brent, Herman, and… Dirk." Nobody catches their marshmallow. "That leaves… Anders and Cary. The last marshmallow goes to…"

"Cary." Cary is hit in the face with his marshmallow. He frowns as he looks at Anders.

Anders stands and says, "Ja. You made right decision… You made only decision."

"Anders," Cary states. "This wasn’t your fault. It was a freak accident."

"Ja," Anders replies. "I am both freak, and accident. I am sorry everyone." Anders walks down to The Dock of Shame. Cary sadly looks after him.

A helicopter flies overhead. Cary says, "That must be the helicopter coming to medevac Evan."

Brent says quietly, "Reminds me of the day they flew in to take Frederick away… That still strikes me as odd." Cary looks over at Brent.

In front of the camera, Chris states, "What a doozy of an episode, am I right? My heart goes out to Evan’s mother… Anywho… Tune in next time for more Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst!" Several marshmallows get thrown at Chris before the screen fades to black.

Officer Darryl can be seen eating Sour Cream and Radish chips in the reflection of the television.

### Chapter 9 - Don’t Cry Over Spilled Tea

Chris McLean appears on camera with a wide smile on his face. He states, "Last time on Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst, things got real, and I can just feel the ratings rolling in." Chris rubs his hands together. "The teams battled it out on a shaky foundation. The Black Swans came out victorious, but Anders recklessness caused part of the structure to fall toward the contestants sitting out of the challenge. Evan was the one to take the brunt of the impact, requiring him to be pulled from the game. Anders took the heat at the campfire ceremony and was voted out. With all the commotion spilling over from last episode, what will happen next? Stay tuned to find out."

Zane and Esme are seen standing on the Dock of Shame together. Zane states, "I didn’t sign up for this."

Esme nods. She adds, "But we can’t really back out, now." Zane rubs his forehead with his forearm. "I just hope Evan is okay."

"Yeah," Zane states as he looks down. "It makes me feel bad that something about the guy gave me a weird vibe." Esme looks over at Zane. "And on top of all of this, Chris wants us to find another new… old contestant. I guess we’ll have to call that Yancy guy."

Esme shakes her head. She admits, "He’s no longer available. I guess he’s joined some new dating show where everyone dresses up like barnyard animals."

"I heard of that. Isn’t it called ‘E I E I Oh, Baby’, or something like that?" Zane states with a glazed expression.

"I sure as heck hope not," Esme responds with a shrug. "We’re running low on options of people who haven’t competed twice already, let alone anyone that fits any of my criteria." Esme gestures at her clipboard.

"Let me see that," Zane snatches the clipboard from Esme as she protests.

"Hey, give that back!" Esme attempts to reach her clipboard and waves her arms dramatically, but Zane easily keeps it above her reach.

Zane’s expression looks blank. He reveals, "This just says, ‘Tall, dark, or handsome’." He lowers his reach, as Esme grasps it back.

Esme blushes. She admits, "That pool is all but dried up."

Zane laughs smugly, "Too bad I’ve already been back on."

Esme shrugs and responds, "You fit the tall criteria at least." Zane glares back at her. She shrugs, "Oh, well. I guess we’ll need to call an uggo."

"What’s your explanation for Herman?" Zane asks with a raised eyebrow.

"That was Chris’ call," Esme explains.

Zane holds his chin. He admits, "Oh, yeah. That’s right."

"I mean, not that he doesn’t have his appeal," Esme backtracks.

Zane admits, "I feel like we’re forgetting someone. Like they’re right under our noses." Esme and Zane pause. They look down and see Isaiah floating in the lake on his back as he slowly moves from beneath the dock. Esme and Zane look at each other with wide eyes. Zane calls out, "Hey, bro! Come talk to us."

Isaiah looks up as he notices the duo. He puts his hands on the dock and pulls himself up. He greets, "Hello to you both." He looks back and forth at the pair as Esme blushes. "I know I fly home early tomorrow, but it was a nice night for a swim, do you not think?"

"Uh, yeah, dude," Zane answers. Zane looks over at Esme. "Are you going to ask him?" Esme looks flustered.

Isaiah puts his hands up. "I just want to be up front, you seem like nice people but I am not interested in a… throuple. Is that the right word?"

Zane’s eyes widen. He responds, "No, no, dude. It’s nothing like that. Not that you aren’t a beautiful dude… No homo." Esme looks Isaiah up and down. Zane looks over at her. "I guess I’m on my own on this…" He turns toward Isaiah. "We have an open slot on the show. We were just going to ask you if you would be willing to compete, again."

Isaiah smiles and assures, "I appreciate the offer, but the last time I competed was not exactly an enjoyable experience. I will have to decline your offer."

Esme looks disappointed as Zane responds, "Totally understandable. I respect your decision. We have tons of other players we can ask, I suppose I shouldn’t have made an exception for you just because you happen to be here."

Isaiah blinks. "I thank you for your understanding," Isaiah responds. "I wish you good fortune in finding…"

Zane adds, "The thing is that getting a chance of a lifetime to compete on a show like this rarely happens once, let alone twice, not to mention that a season with low placing players will probably never happen again."

"That is probably true," Isaiah agrees as he looks aside.

Zane adds, "I’m sure whoever we call would love to enter the game when eight people have already been eliminated." Zane places a hand on his head. "What a crazy advantage. I personally would jump at the chance to come back if I hadn’t already returned." Zane looks over at Esme.

Esme blinks. Zane gestures as he lifts his chin. Esme responds hectically, "Uh, yeah. Me, too."

Isaiah scratches his right arm. He states, "I will do it. I will return." Isaiah smiles wide.

"I mean… I suppose we could let you on, even though there are a bunch of people lined up ahead of you," Zane responds. He looks at Esme and smirks.

Isaiah bows his head and says, "You are too kind."

Esme quietly says to Zane, "You’re good."

Zane replies, "I know."

Isaiah smiles wide, as he says, "You really sparked in me an excitement to play this game, again. And for that I thank you." He hugs a flustered looking Esme. He lets go of her.

"You were just in the right place at the right…" Zane begins. Isaiah hugs Zane tight and lifts him in the air. Zane’s face turns a little red.

"Thank you!" Isaiah repeats. "Wow. You are even lighter than you look." He sets Zane down.

Zane replies, "Um… Yeah, man. No problem. Happy to have you."

Isaiah looks down at his swim trunks and states, "I better go get my clothing. Excuse my immodesty, I was not expecting to be on camera…" Isaiah waves his arms about. "I am so very excited." Isaiah abruptly walks off.

Esme looks off at Isaiah. "Not only did we find a player, but what are the chances that he fits all three of my criteria?" Esme looks over at Zane and smirks. "It doesn’t seem I’m alone in thinking that."

Zane responds, "Thanks for rejoining me…" Esme’s smirk lingers on him. "What do you want me to say? He’s an attractive dude. I’m okay with saying it." He looks to the side. "Plus I got a little winded when he squeezed me."

"Uh huh," Esme replies.

Someone can be loudly heard saying in the distance, "I am not letting you transport him. Not in this condition!" Zane and Esme jolt.

"What is going on?" Zane asks. Esme shrugs as they walk in the direction of the voice.

Nurse Bigby is speaking with the helicopter crew. He firmly states, "We have what we need right here to treat his injuries. I can get right to work."

"I’m just following orders," the helicopter crewman replies.

Nurse Bigby asserts, "You’re just an online shopping delivery service. Evan needs immediate treatment. He’s staying here."

The helicopter crewman shakes his head. "Step aside."

Nurse Bigby, with his sleeves rolled up, has his arms folded as he does not move. Esme leans toward Zane and says quietly, "Was Nurse Bigby always this intimidating?" Zane shakes his head.

Chris walks up and asks, “What’s going on here?"

The helicopter crewman insists, “This brute is refusing to let us take the injured twerp."

Nurse Bigby explains, “Chris, we can rebuild him, we have the technology. I’m afraid that if we don’t treat Evan right away, there will be permanent damage that could be avoided. I’m just asking for one day."

Chris nods. He states, "If he gets treated here, it can be televised. Evan stays."

The helicopter crewman states, "But Mr. McLean…" Chris snaps his fingers and laughs as he walks away. Frustrated, the helicopter crew walk back to the helicopter.

Zane and Esme look on. Zane states, “That was impressive."

Nurse Bigby laughs slightly. “Uh, thanks…" He turns to Zane. He explains, "We are a little short staffed right now. I could use your assistance, if you’re willing and available."

Zane nods. "Yeah, dude. I’m happy to help." Nurse Bigby smiles. "That is, if Esme can spare me."

Esme nods. "Spare you? Of course I can." Zane frowns. She assures, "Evan’s health is more important than our silly little show." Zane nods as he follows after Nurse Bigby.

Zoe is shown sitting down next to Ruth outside their shared cabin. Zoe asks, "What are you up to?"

"I’m making some sculptures," Ruth explains. Several small clay figures are standing on the porch in front of Ruth.

Zoe’s eyes light up. "Oh, yeah! This is the clay we carried together."

"You’ve been the biggest inspiration I’ve had since… my last season," Ruth explains.

Zoe looks at the figures. "These are so…" She forces a smile. "Cool?" She points at one of them. "I like this octopus."

"I’m glad you like it. That’s you," Ruth states proudly.

Zoe blinks. She responds, "It is?"

Ruth pouts. "Oh no. You don’t see it."

"Of course I do," Zoe assures with an enthusiastic nod. She points at another glob of clay. "Just like that one is Blair."

Ruth scratches the back of her head. "Um. That’s a refrigerator."

Zoe winces. "I knew that."

Ruth looks down. She admits, "I cant help but say that I like you and all, but I don’t know if things are going to work out between us."

"I promise I can learn to appreciate art more," Zoe assures. "I’ll even buy a monocle."

"It’s not that," Ruth replies.

Zoe looks confused. She asks, "I guess I don’t know what you mean."

Ruth explains, "It’s those little comments about people’s weight. Like Blair, and then there’s Cary’s muffin top. I firmly believe that every body is beautiful."

Zoe scratches the side of her face. She assures, "I just want people to live their healthiest lives. People like Blair could be contributing members of society if they applied themselves."

Ruth shakes her head. She admits, "I don’t know if you noticed, but Blair has been giving it her all in challenges, and she’s performed better than the both of us."

Zoe blinks. She responds, "I don’t think that’s right."

"I’m sorry," Ruth replies. She rubs her forehead. "You might not know it, but it was a big part of my first season, but Cary also used to suffer from an eating disorder."

Zoe looks taken aback. She admits, "I didn’t know."

Ruth assures, "I get that, but maybe you should try to consider that people may have triggers, even if you don’t know it." Ruth stands up. "I’m gonna go. Have a good night." Ruth walks away as Zoe looks down at the ground.

The following day, the contestants are gathered for the next challenge. Esme announces, "The men have already had an opportunity to meet their new team member." Esme turns back. "Come on out!" Isaiah arrives from behind the set wearing a pink and blue shirt with a palm tree graphic print.

Tamira’s face drops. She mutters, "Oh, no…"

"Oh, yeah!" Grace states.

Isaiah waves as he bows to the contestants. Esme introduces, "Meet Isaiah."

Isaiah looks at the other contestants. He smiles wide. "Ah. Hello, fellow competitors. I am Isaiah. It is most pleasant to meet all of your acquaintances. I am humbled to be allowed to enter the game at this late stage."

"So this is the…" Ruth counts on her fingers. "14th contestant on the men’s team?" Some of the women start chattering.

Esme assures, "Now, now. No women have dropped out of the competition. Had they, we would have replaced them with another woman. Chris gave specific instructions to do things this way in cases of premature eliminations. Also, many fan favorites have been able to rejoin the competition due to this provision, as well as Reginald." Reginald blinks.

"Speaking of…" Dirk looks down. "Are there any updates on Bones?"

"Who?" Esme asks, looking unsure.

"He means Evan," Jerome clarifies.

Luke adds, "I went to visit him last night at that there medical tent, but the feller wasn’t able to take any visitors."

Esme explains, "I have received word that Evan is going to be just fine. No vital organs were seriously injured, but he has suffered a few broken bones."

Dirk looks down. He quietly says, "It should have been me to take that hit. I could have handled it like a man." Luke places a hand on Dirk’s shoulder and leaves it there. Dirk looks over at it, and then back toward Esme.

Isaiah greets Tamira as he stands with The Raging Bulls, "Hello, cousin. I am so happy to be able to join you for this friendly competition."

"Cousin?" Herman asks. Reginald lifts an eyebrow.

Tamira responds, "Oh, yes. Isaiah is my husband’s cousin."

Reginald mutters, "That hardly seems fair."

Isaiah smiles. "No need to be so cordial, dear cousin." He turns to the others. "We are very close. We get together for a cookout nearly every week, as well as meeting for drinks at…"

Tamira clears her throat. She flaps her wrist up and down as she states, "You don’t have to bore everyone with all those details."

Isaiah laughs. "Ah. I apologize for rambling on. Let us give our attention back to our lady host."

"Assistant host," Esme corrects with a slight blush. She adjusts her collar. "Our challenge today is sure to be a good one. Each player that does not sit out of the challenge will take a turn at the hot seat." Esme gestures toward a chair at the end of row of chairs. A podium with a large red button is set up in front of the single chair.

"What does all of that mean?" Blair asks.

Esme nods. She suggests, "Maybe I should introduce our special guest. You know her from Total Drama Wilderness, where she placed fairly poorly. She really grew in popularity after her appearance on Total Drama: The All-Stars."

"Oh no…" Tamira states as she places a hand on her forehead.

"What is wrong?" Isaiah asks.

A petite woman with a massive head of blonde hair steps into center stage. "Th-that’s…" Cary stutters.

"Should I know who this is?" Isaiah asks with a blank look.

"Why yes, it is I," the woman poses with a wide smile. "Hedda, your humble gossip columnist extraordinaire!"

Esme adds, "Hedda has joined us today out of the kindness of her heart."

"As well as for a sizable check… But unfortunately, under contract to not spill the beans on dear Esme’s court records," Hedda adds with a nod, her hair wobbling as a result.

Esme looks flustered. She responds, "She kids." Hedda smirks. "This is how the challenge will play out. When a contestant is seated in the hot seat, the player will be given a chance to allow Hedda to reveal a secret about them. They can choose a number between one and five, one is the least shocking secret, and five is the most shocking. After Hedda begins reading the gossip or reveals any evidence, the players will be given the opportunity to press that big red button, which means they have chosen to plead the fifth. Hedda will stop reading the secret, and that contestant will forfeit any points for their team."

Tamira raises her hand and asks when she is called on, "What if we all decide to do that… not that I have anything to hide? Totes asking for a friend."

Esme explains, "You will definitely want to avoid that if you can help it. The team with the lowest points after the six rounds will be at a massive disadvantage."

"Being?" Grace asks.

"That team," Esme explains, "will need to vote out two of their team members." The players gasp. "Now the men will need to sit out down to six players to match the women."

"I’ll be happy to sit out," Cary states as he raises a hand.

Esme shakes her head. She states, "Those that sit out will be chosen at random." Cary’s face cracks. Esme looks down at a piece of paper. She shifts her lips to the side as she looks down at it. She looks up at the players and states, "Hedda has randomly chosen Herman and Isaiah to sit out." A few male contestants groan.

Hedda smirks as she looks to the side and states, "What a coincidence... The most interesting thing I could dig up on these two goodie two shoes was that Isaiah has a stamp collection, and Herman once  accidentally used an ice spell when LARPing when he should have used a fire spell."

Herman dramatically holds a forearm over his eyes and laments, "A most amateur of blunders."

Grace leans in toward Tamira and states, "A stamp collection?"

"Totes lame, right?" Tamira asks. "I understand if you have no interest in the guy, anymore…"

Grace shakes her head as she replies, "That’s the kind of blandness I need in a relationship. I’m tired of all the drama." Tamira frowns.

Brent looks at Luke. He states, “You’ve been quieter than normal. I know it’s none of my business, so I’ll just…"

"Golly," Luke replies. "Am I?" Luke rubs the back of his head. "There’s just been something kind of bugging me about the… accident. Something that didn’t add up."

Brent blinks. "I don’t think it was anything more than accident... Why? Do you think there was foul play involved?"

Luke forces a smile. He states, "I didn’t see no chickens." Brent blinks. "Gosh. I’m not smart like you. I’m probably just confused is all."

Brent assures, "I’m not sm…"

Hedda announces, "It’s now time for our first round. Any volunteers?" Hedda has a sadistic smile on her face.

"Golly," Luke replies as he stands up. "I reckon I’ll go first. My life is an open book." Hedda gestures at the chair as Luke sits in it. He looks around.

"Famous last words." Hedda states, "I have five facts I dug up on you. Again, one is the least incriminating," Luke blinks, "and five is the most. As I read your choice, you may push that red button at any time. By doing so, I stop reading, but you forfeit any points you may earn for your team. Any questions?"

Luke nods. "Pardon my directness, but…" He asks, "Why does your hair look like a right crow’s nests?"

“Go ahead and select your point level," Hedda directs impatiently.

"Uh…" Luke states. "Like I said, I have nothing to hide. I reckon I’ll pick…" Luke looks over at his team. "Number five."

Hedda’s lips curl up at the ends. “I admire the reckless grandstanding, dear. Makes for much more messy tv." Hedda holds up a card. "Luke here likes people to think he’s just an easygoing, good ole boy, but the truth is…" Hedda holds up a picture. The others gasp. "Luke here has an arrest record." She gestures at the mugshot with her card. Luke looks incredibly serious, and angry in the mugshot. In person, Luke looks embarrassed as he looks to the side.

Luke assures, “I reckon that was a long time ago."

Hedda continues, “Luke here was arrested for assaulting a well respected community physician." Some of the others look at Luke with concern. Hedda smiles. "Well done. You took the hit, just like that elderly doctor you attacked in cold blood."

Esme adds, “Um… Luke earned five points for his team. Nice job?" Awkward applause takes place.

Luke stands up and assures, “It wasn’t like all that." He sits down next to his team. Herman scoots over to distance himself from Luke.

Dirk smiles as he admits, "I didn’t know you had it in you."

Luke shakes his head. He assures, “I don’t. I was right stupid back then, and really angry about how that doc done mucked up my operation."

Dirk thinks back. "Does that have to do with that gnarly scar on your stomach? I think it looks pretty cool."

"Uh, thanks…" Luke nods. "Once he realized who I was, he dropped all charges. I’m not happy about what happened to me and all, but I learned to let go once I realized I couldn’t change what happened. Plus the doc seemed real sorry like."

Dirk assures, "I think what you did was pretty cool." Luke looks concerned. "I mean, not hitting that button during all that."

Luke nods and assures, "Thanks… I just hope it didn’t change how the team views me, is all." Herman nervously attempts to avoid eye contact when Luke looks over at him. Luke frowns.

Ruth is in the hot seat. Hedda plays shaky footage of Ruth running through the streets covered in paint, and the nudity censored. Ruth smugly assures, "And I’d do it again."

Esme announces, "Ruth earns five points for her team." Brent, Herman, Cary, and Isaiah are all shown blushing.

Ruth sits down next to Blair. Blair gushes, "That was so cool. And your running form was impressive."

Ruth assures, "It was nothing. I’m glad I was able to bring awareness to the plight facing the clown nosed beetle."

"Oh my gosh. Are they in danger of extinction?" Blair asks, looking concerned.

Ruth shakes her head. She responds, "What? No. Nothing like that. I just felt bad because people are always making fun of how stupid they look. That’s not okay." Blair looks back at Ruth blankly and then forces a smile.

Zoe looks over at the pair. She assures, "Blair, I just want you to know that I don’t think you look all that stupid."

Blair blinks. "Okay?"

Reginald is shown in the hot seat. Hedda reads, “For three points… Reginald’s father paid off a romantic interest of Reginald’s in order to never see him again."

Reginald, looking disinterested, replies, “He did, did he? That does sound like daddy."

Hedda frowns. She notes, "You don’t seem upset. Gordon, your ex lover, said you were very much in love." She holds up a picture of a burly, brown haired man wearing a captain’s hat with Reginald at what appears to be a fair or amusement park. Reginald is holding a large stuffed alligator in the picture, that is torn in half, but taped up.

Reginald looks to the side. "I knew I should have put that picture through the shredder."

Hedda assures, "I like paper shredders. It’s much more of a challenge to put the pieces back together."

"Did she just out Reginald?" Blair asks Grace with wide eyes.

Reginald confirms, “Hardly. I have been quite open about my sexuality. And as for Gordon… That dimwit couldn’t differentiate love from lust." Some of the others look on with wide eyes. "Daddy did me a favor. That loser was a lowly door to door fish stick salesman. That relationship had no future."

"Harsh, boo," Jerome states from the side of his mouth.

Reginald turns to Hedda. “Are we done here?" A disappointed Hedda nods with a frown.

Reginald walks toward his team’s section. Esme announces, “Three points for The Raging Bulls."

Reginald states in confessional, "I have been open about my sexuality for over a decade. Last time, the show tried to edit things to look like I had some strange crush on that little… Missy… My real story didn’t fit their narrative. Probably why I barely got any screen time." Reginald looks aside.

Dirk leans in toward Reginald and asks, “So you still have that Gordon guy’s number?”

"We’re done here," Reginald ends the conversation. Dirk frowns.

After a skipped segment, Esme announces, "And to recap, Quimberly has quite impressively taken the lead for The Black Swans. They now lead ten to eight." The others applaud.

Quimberly is seated next to Blair. "Gosh! I can’t believe you rescued that entire tribe with a few paper clips, a rubber band, some chewing gum, and a dish towel."

Quimberly rolls her eyes and insists, “It’s not a big deal."

"Next up is Cary," Esme announces. Cary nervously walks up to the hot seat. He sits down.

Hedda smiles widely. "Now this is a juicy one." Cary immediately hits the red button. "We haven’t even chosen a point level."

"One." Cary replies. Dirk slaps his own forehead.

Hedda smirks and quickly begins, “Cary was once found sleeping inside a…" Cary hits his button. Hedda frowns, swings her arm, and says, “Darn."

Cary rushes to his seat. Esme announces, "No points for the guys. The score remains the same. Zoe is next." The other men look at Cary with crossed arms.

Zoe is seated in front of the button, and looks confident. "I’ll choose the two point reveal."

"Two?" Grace asks. "That’s it?"

Hedda begins, ”Zoe declares herself an advocate for healthy living." Hedda holds up a photo turned away from the camera. "So why was she seen in the parking lot of Mr. Wavy Gravy Burger’s three weeks ago eating this!" Zoe springs at the button, before Hedda reveals the image. Hedda frowns.

Zoe walks over to her teammates. She sits down proudly. "Yup. I’d say that was a success."

"You’re kidding,” Grace states. “All that over a Wavy Gravy Burger?”

Zoe explains, “Oh, it wasn’t a Wavy Gravy Burger. I can’t ruin my reputation by allowing that image to leak to the public." Zoe holds her hand up in a fist. "After years of living healthy, I earned that potato wedge!”

"One potato wedge?!" Grace responds. "This is ridiculous." She shakes her head, as Zoe looks content.

Brent is seated in the hot seat. Hedda asks, “Please choose a point level for your secret."

Brent shrugs and selects, "Three, I guess?"

Hedda smiles and assures, “I knew you would pick that one." Hedda smiles wide. She pulls out a sheet of paper. "Now, I’m not sure if even Brent knows this one." Brent blinks. "Each of you took a series of tests before competing on the show. It appears that Brent did remarkably well on one of the sections.”

"I did?" Brent asks. "I assumed I did average on every portion."

"Brent here consistently claims to be completely average," Hedda claims as she gestures toward the brown haired man.

"It’s true," Dirk adds with a rapid nod of his head. "I’ve seen him in the showers."

Hedda does not seem phased as she continues, "According to this report and additional testing, Brent has an extraordinary autobiographical memory."

"I do?" Brent asks. He looks to the side. Some of the others look over at him.

"See?" Luke adds. "I knew you was smart."

Brent insists, "I’m really not that smart. I just… assumed everyone remembered stuff like I do."

"I don’t remember what I ate for breakfast yesterday," Blair admits.

"I do," Zoe assures with a wide smile. "I’ve eaten sixteen raw eggs for the last ten years."

Blair adds, "With a side of salmonella?" The others laugh. Blair looks surprised at the reaction, while Zoe looks slightly embarrassed.

Hedda tilts her head to the side. "Let’s get back to me, shall we?"

Jerome puts a hand in front of his mouth as he states to Reginald, "I think her head is finally capsizing, hunty." Hedda glares in his direction, as Reginald laughs.

Hedda calls, "Blair, it’s your turn." Blair sits next to Hedda in the hot seat.

Blair looks distracted as her eyes wander around the stage. "Wow. It looks a lot different over here." She waves at the camera. "Hi, mom!"

Hedda taps her index card on the railing next to her. "Don’t forget why we’re here, dearie."

"Isn’t it a television show about drama or something like that?" Blair asks. "I wonder why they call it ‘Total Drama’. It’s not really a reference to anything, right? And it’s not only about drama, like the word ‘total’ implies." Blair counts on her fingers. "There’s some comedy, adventure, and sometimes romance, right?"

Grace rubs her eyes. She asks, "I must be dreaming… Is Blair actually making sense?"

Hedda asks with an eye roll, "Let’s get to the secret, shall we, dear? Blair, what number difficulty level would you like?"

Blair puts a hand under her chin. She states, confidently, "Five." She pauses. "Now wait, four. No, definitely five. But three has a…"

"Five it is," Hedda states as she shuffles through the index cards. She smirks. "Blair just gave us a great example of her conversation skills."

"No one suffers in silence around me, that’s what my family always says, anyway," Blair assures with a chuckle.

"At one point, she even decided to use her passion for talking to help those less fortunate," Hedda explains.

"That’s right," Blair adds. She goes on, "I volunteered at a local nursing home where I would sit and talk to some of the elderly people, the little darlings."

"Ah ha ha ha!" Hedda lowers her eyelids. "Let me finish." Blair makes a zipping motion over her lips. Hedda continues, "The nursing home director eventually asked Blair to stop visiting, as three people passed away while she spoke to them."

"They died?!" Blair asks with wide eyes. "I just thought they were really good listeners."

Esme announces, "Wow… Well… That’s five points for The Black Swans."

"Did I mention the time that older gentleman’s ear literally fell off when I was talking to him?" Blair adds.

"Way to go, Blair!" Zoe cheers. "This is me commending your efforts and acknowledging your contribution to the challenge." She momentarily looks over at Ruth. "And might I add, Blair, that you look…" Zoe’s eye twitches. "L-l-lovely, today?"

"Um. Thanks?" Blair replies. "But I like guys almost as much as Dirk does."

"And that’s a lot," Dirk adds with a sharp nod.

Zoe clarifies, "No, I wasn’t flirting with you. I would never… I just…" Ruth frowns. Zoe’s gaze slowly shifts over to the rainbow haired woman.

Esme announces, "Thanks to Blair. The score is now fifteen to eleven, with The Black Swans in the lead."

Hedda points to Jerome. "You’re up, Jerome." Jerome nods and sashays to the hot seat.

Jerome looks confident as he folds his arms. He says, "Hit me, boo. I’ll take a five point reveal. I don’t got nothing to hide."

Hedda nods. She smirks. "I think everyone will be surprised to learn a little secret about Jerome. I think it would be easier just to show you." Hedda holds up and turns around a picture. The others gasp.

Jerome blinks and looks at the image, and then at his fellow competitors. "Secret? Am I missing something, y’all?"

Hedda smiles. She reveals, "That’s right. This is a photo of Jerome kissing a woman!"

Jerome blinks, again. He explains, "Henny, that just isn’t any old woman. That’s my longtime girlfriend, Chantelle." Jerome waves at the camera. "Hey, boo!" Jerome winks and blows kisses toward the camera. "Kisses!" Jerome squints at the camera and smooths over his eyebrows. He smiles. "Jerome, sweetie. Your eyebrows are on fleek, as always." Jerome finishes with a tongue click.

"I thought this was a picture from a play, or something," Cary admits. "I thought Jerome was a gay icon."

Dirk scratches his head. He turns to Cary and admits, "Jerome? He’s the straightest guy I know." Dirk thinks back, as he turns back to face Jerome. "Remember that time at the Playa Des Losers that I walked in on you making out with…"

Jerome puts a hand on Dirk’s arm as he returns to his seat. Jerome says, "Boo. You know I don’t kiss and tell." Jerome holds up his hand to look at his fingernails.

Dirk assures, "Er, sorry, man.”

Grace wipes her eyes. She admits, "I will never look at the guy the same way, again."

"Et tu, boo?" Jerome adds as he glares at Grace.

Grace winces as she admits, "I guess I made some assumptions. Sorry, Jerome."

Jerome laughs. "Boo. I’ve never been one to follow societal norms. If people didn’t realize I was straight, I don’t see that as a bad thing. Straight guys can also care about their appearance, though."

"Your appearance…" Grace repeats. "Right."

Hedda has her chin in one of her hands. She admits, "I thought outing Jerome as straight would feel more fulfilling. Oh, wellsies."

Esme announces, "The score is now sixteen to fifteen with the men leading. Grace, it’s your turn."

Tamira leans toward Grace. Tamira requests, "Choose a big number. That way, I can pick a lower number."

Grace glares at Tamira. "This ain’t about you, girl." Tamira frowns.

Once she reaches the hot seat, Hedda asks Grace, "What level reveal are you choosing?"

Grace looks over at a worried Tamira. She sighs. "I’ll take a five pointer." Tamira looks excited as she squirms in her seat.

Hedda looks at her card. She smirks as she reads, "Grace likes to appear to be tough and that she puts herself first, but appearances can be deceiving. After experiencing some difficult times, Grace put her own goals on hold in order to…"

Grace leans in and presses the red button. Grace’s face looks flushed as the others look on. Blair states, "I never would have expected Grace to press the button."

Quimberly has her arms folded. She insists, "I did."

"I wonder what Hedda was going to say," Jerome states aloud. He rubs his perfectly stubbly chin.

As she sits next to Tamira, Grace states, "Sorry. I guess that puts more pressure on you."

Tamira admits, "NGL, I am disappointed." Tamira pauses. "But I know you had your reasons for stopping the tea."

"Dirk is the last man standing," Esme announces. "He has an opportunity to get an insurmountable lead for the guys."

Dirk steps up to the hot seat. He whips off his shirt and tosses it aside. "Give me a five point reveal. I can take it." He grasps the arms of the chair. "I want to prove myself as the top dog on our team."

Hedda smirks. "As you wish, sweetie." She tilts her head to the side. "Dirk sure seems obsessed with an image of being strong." She holds up an image, to which the other players gasp. The picture shows a picture of Dirk looking battered and bruised with his eyes closed. It looks like an image from a medical examination. "Doctors went on the record, stating that they initially did not think Dirk would survive from these injuries."

Dirk smiles wide. "That’s it? That’s the reveal?” He points at the picture with a laugh. "It was just a flesh wound."

Hedda admits, "That’s not the full reveal." Hedda pauses before continuing, "Dirk received these injuries from his…"

Dirk propels himself forward and hits the button, causing Hedda to stop reading. Hedda laments, "Darn." Dirk’s face is bright red. Dirk gets up from the seat and picks his shirt up and looks dejected as he returns to his seat.

Cary puts a hand on Dirk’s shoulder and assures, "It’s alright, buddy. Did your frat bros do that to you? Was it something like a prank gone wrong? Some of your stories have been a little discon…"

Dirk fiercely states to Cary without looking at him. "I don’t want to talk about it."

Cary backs off, but still looks concerned. "I’m here to talk if you ever need it…" Dirk remains quiet, as he looks away from Cary. Cary’s eyes look watery, before he seems frustrated before he wipes them.

"Well, thanks to Dirk’s cop out, Tamira has a chance to win this challenge for us, as long as she chooses at least a two point reveal," Zoe states as she leans in toward her team. "Right, Tamira?" Tamira looks blank. She stands up and lifelessly walks over to the hot seat. Zoe blinks. "What’s up with her?" The others shrug.

Tamira nervously sits in the hot seat as Hedda has a devilish grin on her face. She looks over at Hedda. She mumbles, "Hey, Hedda. How’s it going? I love what you’ve done with your… face."

Hedda impatiently states. "Let’s get down to business. Pick a point level, dearie."

Esme reminds, "You need one to tie, and at least a two to win. If you fail to sit through the revelation, The Black Swans lose and you will need to eliminate two team members."

Tamira gulps. She replies, "Is a zero an option?" Esme shakes her head. Tamira laughs nervously as she gulps, again. "I’ll take a one point reveal."

"A one?!" Zoe shouts out.

Hedda looks disappointed. She rolls her eyes. Tamira holds her hands over the red button in anticipation. Hedda reads off an index card. "Tamira… is… married… to…" Tamira’s eyes are wide, as she lowers her hands. Hedda rolls her eyes. "Her fake eyelashes."

"Is that legal in this province?" Blair asks with wide eyes.

"That’s it?" Tamira asks. Hedda nods, with her lips pursed. Tamira breathes a deep sigh of relief.

Esme announces, "Tamira earns a point for her team, meaning we have to do a tiebreaker…"

"We are not doing a tiebreaker," Grace objects. The others nod.

"Let me confer with Chris," Esme walks away with a walkie talkie.

Tamira goes on, "I am, like, so relieved. I totes thought you were going to tell everyone that my husband is a stripper." Hedda’s lips curl up at the ends, as Tamira’s eyes widen. She looks over at her fellow competitors. "Oh, no…"

Hedda states, "Well… Since the dancer has jumped out of the cake, as they say…"

"Who says that?" Jerome asks with an eye roll. Hedda rolls out a poster. Jerome asks with wide eyes, "Did you tear that off a wall?"

Tamira looks shocked as she hurriedly pushes the button. "It’s too late for that, now," Hedda explains with a smirk. "It turns out that Tamira’s hubbie twerks hard for the money, at a place called ‘The Junk Yard’." Tamira puts her hands over her face. Dirk holds his head up as he looks at the poster with wide eyes.

"He twerks at a junk yard?" Ruth asks, looking confused.

Dirk perks up as he states, "Wait. I know that place. It’s super cool."

"You do?" Luke asks. "Did you dance there, too?"

"Nah," Dirk replies. "I auditioned there, but I’m not much of a dancer."

Isaiah admits, "I did, as well." Isaiah nods. "I fell through a table."

"I would watch that," Dirk admits, sticking out his lower lip.

Tamira looks up. "No one seems judgy."

"Why would we?" Zoe asks. "Exotic dancers are athletes." She narrows her eyes. "That thin one could do a few more crunches, though." She looks over at Ruth, shaking her head. "I mean, he’s perfect the way he is." Ruth nods.

"That’s Toby Determined," Dirk explains. "Dude is a skinny legend. What he lacks in muscle mass, he makes up for with sick dance moves."

Tamira admits, "Right… That one’s my husband."

Dirk’s eyes get wide and he stands up. He bows down in front of Tamira and says, "I’m not worthy! I’m not worthy!" Tamira places a hand over her chest as she looks down at Dirk.

Grace looks at the poster. She asks, "Is he a miner?"

Tamira scoffs and glares aside. "FYI, he is well over the age of consent, TYSM."

Grace blinks. She says, "No, I…"

"Oh…" Ruth reacts. "That kind of junk… I think it’s pretty cool, actually. Every body is beautiful, and there’s no reason to be ashamed. Right, Zoe?" Zoe reluctantly nods.

Blair looks over at Zoe. She says, "Yeah? Because I was considering going to these pole dance lessons at my local senior center." Zoe’s eyes twitches.

Tamira blinks. "Really?  None of you seem pressed?" Tamira looks to the side. "I guess I was worried about nothing."

Quimberly states, "It sounds to me like you’re the one who has some sort of a complex about it." Tamira grasps her opposite arm with one of her hands.

Brent narrows his eyes as he thinks. "Wait. Didn’t the guy dressed as a police officer look familiar? Something was different about him, though."

Tamira explains, "That was Officer Jimmie ‘The Under the Covers Officer’. He didn’t work their long. Come to think of it, he kind of disappeared after a drug ring run by one of the bartenders was uncovered."

"And they said I couldn’t dance," Dirk states with his arms folded as he glares to the side. "I’ve been locked in a freezer with dead fish that dance better than that guy."

Brent leans toward Cary. He states, "I kept meaning to mention this, but remember when Frederick left on the helicopter?" Cary nods. "Didn’t it seem pretty abrupt? Like something might have happened on the outside world as opposed to something from the show." Cary appears to think for a moment. He then looks over at Hedda.

Esme steps back up. "I just consulted with Chris. Since you are all against a tiebreaker, Chris has stated that both teams will have to attend the campfire ceremony."

"I mean, that is only fair, since it was supposed to be a double elimination, anyway, right?" Grace states. Some of the others nod.

Hedda clasps her hands. "Well, it looks like my job here is done."

"I wish we could say it was a pleasure," Grace states, as she glares to the side.

Hedda winks toward Grace before gathering up her things. Cary clears his throat. He says, "Hedda? Before you leave… I was wondering if you could share some information from the outside world."

"About?" Hedda asks, without looking over at Cary.

"Frederick Vanderbuilt," Cary states. Tamira raises an eyebrow.

Hedda rolls her eyes. "Oh, that."

"So there was something," Cary states to himself.

Hedda continues, "It was a pretty massive story, but I didn’t break it. Just a missed opportunity for me to be the first."

"We don’t know what happened," Tamira explains. "You could be the first to reveal the story to us."

Hedda’s eyes widen. She states, "You make a valid point." She turns toward the contestants and smiles wide. "In a sad turn of events, heiress and entrepreneur, Daphne Vanderbuilt sadly passed away from a sudden and aggressive illness." The contestants look surprised.

"Maybe I am unaware of the process of Canadian mourning, but she certainly does not seem at all sad about this," Isaiah states.

"Daphne Vanderbuilt was the mother of past contestant Frederick Vanderbuilt, and adoptive mother of former male model, Brad Hartman," Hedda explains.

"Hartman?" Tamira asks. "Wasn’t that Kristy’s last name?"

Hedda nods. "And you didn’t hear it from me, but," Hedda innocently shifts her eyes from one side to the other, "according to reports on Daphne’s Last Will and Testament, it read that unless Frederick found a spouse before her death, his mother vowed to disinherit him. Rumor has it, the will reads that she will be leaving her entire fortune to Brad and his wife, despite his distancing himself from the family." Tamira looks surprised. She looks over at Cary who looks down at the ground.

Tamira asks Cary, "Is that what Frederick told you?" Cary nods. Tamira turns to Esme. "So nothing happened between Frederick and me when I got knocked out?"

Esme nods. "We reviewed the footage, and you both just fell. The timing of the events were unfortunate, but we legally could not reveal why Frederick was evacuated until it became public knowledge. By the time it did, Chris didn’t think it seemed relevant to the competition."

"That’s not right," Jerome adds, narrowing his eyes as he looks at Esme.

"My sincerest apologies, but my hands were tied," Esme admits. Esme looks to the side, as several contestants glare at her.

Hedda tilts her head to one side as she looks at Cary. She states, "Now that I revealed this little tidbit for you, I would say that qualifies me to share one of your secrets."

"Er," Cary responds. "While I appreciate your wealth of information, I did not agree to anything else."

Hedda tilts her head to the opposite side. She smiles wide and says, "You didn’t expect an exchange of information without an exchange." Cary looks concerned, as Hedda looks through her cards. "So many options… Aha! I found the perfect one." Hedda holds up a card. "Cary is no stranger to public embarrassment, yes? One of the most damaging to his personal life however took place at his brother’s…" A drop of water lands on Hedda’s face. She looks up and sees dark clouds overhead. "Um. Sorry to cut things short," Hedda assures, "But rain and my hair do not mix. Toodles, everyone! It’s been fun." Hedda holds some folders and papers over her head as she rushes off.

"Fun does not begin to describe this challenge," Jerome states with his eyes narrowed.

Cary clutches his chest as he gives a big sigh of relief. He states, "That was a close one."

Esme looks up at the steadily increasing rain and states, "It looks like we’re in for quite the rainstorm. Everyone can make your way back to your cabins. You have some rain gear provided there, just in case, which you can put on before you join Chris for the campfire ceremony." The contestants nod as they return to their cabins.

At The Black Swans’ cabin, Blair is rummaging through the protective rain gear. She holds up a pink poncho with polka dots. She says, "Oh. This is nice."

"I’ll take that one," Quimberly states.

Blair frowns. She hands it over and adds, "Sure. Of course. I’ll take what’s left." She winces as she holds up a raincoat that is between the colors of brown and chartreuse. Quimberly walks away. Blair looks after her and states, "Someone has some serious main character syndrome."

Zoe walks up, sporting a nice blue raincoat. She says to Blair, "Hey there, Blair." She grimaces as she states, "Nice raincoat."

Blair responds, "Really? I thought it was pretty rancid. Can I help you with anything?"

"No," Zoe assures. She looks over at Ruth, on the other side of the room talking with Grace. "Actually… Yeah."

"What is it?" Blair asks with a raised eyebrow.

Zoe replies, ”I want your forgiveness."

Blair assures, as she waves her hands around, "Oh, no. You haven’t done anything."

Zoe disagrees, "I have. I shouldn’t be putting pressure on you to lose weight. If anything, you’ve been one of our most reliable challenge competitors. Blair, you really are fine the way you are and a great example to kids across the country." Zoe frowns. "I know I probably don’t seem sincere with all the grief I’ve been giving you, but…" Blair reaches around Zoe and hugs her tight. Zoe looks surprised, but hugs Blair back.

Blair lets go and says, "That means a lot. You should definitely come visit me some time, and I’ll treat you to a potato wedge."

Ruth walks up and says, "Hey, you two. Is Zoe bothering you?" Ruth smirks.

Blair assures, "Quite the opposite."

"Blair, you don’t have to…" Zoe insists.

Blair continues, "I know I don’t have to, but your apologizing has meant more than you can know. Your comments before were really starting to bother me. I know I’m not a ten like Quimberly…"

"If that’s the scale, then nobody is," Ruth agrees. Zoe nods.

Blair continues, "But I was starting to feel really self conscious about my looks, and I didn’t like that. I felt like I was taking my aggression out on you. Anyway, I’m gonna go see what the other women are up to." Blair walks off.

Zoe assures Ruth, "I really didn’t apologize to Blair with the intent that you would find out. You really made me think about how I was tre…"

Ruth leans in and hugs Zoe. Ruth admits, "I really like you, but couldn’t bring myself to ask you out because some of your comments. Seeing you make an effort to change your views really is a step in the right direction."

Tamira looks over at Ruth and Zoe. She turns to the others, "I’m worried about those two."

Quimberly reprimands, "Just because they like each other? That is so narrow minded." Quimberly rolls her eyes.

Tamira looks surprised. She says, "No way! I’m totes an ally, I mean I totally didn’t spill the tea that Dirk is…" The others look at her with wide eyes. "A… brunette." Blair gasps. "I mean no way are his eyebrows that dark without it being his natural hair color."

"What does that have to…" Grace begins.

"Anyway," Tamira adds, "What I’m afraid of is a power couple. I mean, my season was run by a power couple… or maybe more of a power throuple…" Tamira ponders for a moment before shaking her head. "Anyway, you need to watch out for the people who vote as a package deal."

"I don’t know," Blair adds. "I like them."

"Makes sense to me," Quimberly responds with a shrug.

"Okay, I’m in," Blair replies. "But I’m not voting for Zoe."

Tamira shrugs. "That shouldn’t matter."

At The Raging Bulls’ cabin, Reginald, Herman, Brent, Jerome, and Cary are huddled together while Isaiah is on the other side of the room unpacking his things. He states, "I am so happy to be part of this." He has a big smile planted on his face.

"What doth we believe is the most proper way to proceed?" Herman asks with a hand placed under his chin.

"I just want to place better than average," Brent states.

Reginald nods and proposes, "I have an idea I refer to as operation revolving door."

"What does that even mean, boo?" Jerome asks.

Reginald looks over at Isaiah. He looks back at the others gathered with him. "Isaiah is a nice guy, don’t get me wrong. But he was given an unfair advantage by being let back into this game at this stage of the game."

"If I remember right, weren’t you…" Brent begins. Reginald snaps his fingers.

Reginald continues, "I know it might seem cold, but it’s just business. I say we stay strong the five of us, and vote out Isaiah. It’s the only logical move. So… Is everybody in?"

"Yay," Herman responds.

"I mean, I like him, too," Jerome admits. "But it seems like the most fair choice."

"Well, if the majority is in, so am…" Brent begins.

"No," Cary interrupts. He wipes a tear from his eye. "Sorry."

Reginald looks surprised. "Did you just say ‘no’?" He furrows his brow.

Cary replies, "Look." Cary gulps. "I don’t think it’s fair. The guy just got here. He hasn’t been given a fair shake. He hasn’t been given a chance to get to know us, and looks at how excited he looks." The guys look over as Isaiah hums the theme song as he folds his underwear and places it inside a drawer. "I’m sorry. I can’t vote for the guy."

Reginald folds his arms. He asks, "Then who do you suggest we vote for instead?"

"Uh, I…" Cary mutters, as he looks uneasy.

Herman suggests, "What of Dirk?" Reginald and Jerome look at each other. "Where art he, anyway?"

At the elimination ceremony, both teams are gathered. Chris smiles wide, as two interns hold umbrellas over him. He explains, "It looks like we have an unusual set of circumstances. Both teams have already voted. Let’s get straight to the results. The Raging Bulls, we’ll start with you." Chris holds up a tray of marshmallows. He begins tossing them out rapidly. "Jerome. Luke. Herman. Brent. Reginald… and… Isaiah." The men catch their marshmallows. Brent looks down as he struggles to pull the zipper of his raincoat over his chest. "Lastly… We have a marshmallow for…" Cary looks over at Dirk, who looks down at the ground. Dirk is not wearing rain gear and his clothes are soaked.

"Dirk."

Dirk stands up and says, "It’s been…" Dirk catches his marshmallow. He looks surprised. He sits back down.

Cary pats Dirk on the back. He stands up and smiles. He says, "Good game. I did much better than I thought I would."

"Fare thee well, dear Cary," Herman states.

Cary assures, "Both of your forgiveness means a lot to me." Cary hugs Herman and Brent before walking down to The Boat of Losers.

Chris announces, "Alright. That’s one down. Now for The Black Swans.” The host holds up another tray of marshmallows. "The safe contestants are… Quimberly, Blair, Zoe, and Grace." The four catch their marshmallows. Chris smiles as he holds up the final marshmallow. "This one goes to…" Tamira looks unsure. Ruth looks over at Zoe, who forces a smile.

"Tamira." Tamira looks relieved as she receives her marshmallow.

Zoe frowns. She says, "I know we were just getting to know each other, but I will miss you so much."

Zoe stands up to hug Ruth goodbye. Ruth assures, "Win this for me." She forms her hand in a peace sign, and says, "Peace out," to her other former teammates. The Black Swans wave at her.

As Ruth makes her way down The Dock of Shame, Zoe yells out, "You lit a fire under me! There is no stopping me now!" The others on her team laugh, except for a generally disinterested looking Quimberly.

After Ruth boards The Boat of Losers and joins Cary. The teams stand up. A light gleams in Chris’ eye. He asks, "Where are you all going?"

"Back to our cabins, thanks for asking," Blair responds.

"We’d love to stay," Jerome assures, "but the rain is really coming down, now." Jerome tightens his grip on his rain hat in order to protect his hair.

Chris shakes his head. He explains, "We are not done here."

"We did the double elimination," Tamira states, she twirls a strand of hair with one of her fingers. "Are we missing something?"

Chris nods, his smile wider than normal. "The rules of the challenge stated that the team with the lowest points, overall, would eliminate two players. Since both of the teams tied, they both have the lowest amount of points meaning…"

Reginald places his face in his hand. He states, "Oh, drat…"

Luke looks confused. He looks over at Reginald. "Golly," he says. "I’m more in the dark than when I locked myself in the shed overnight." Luke looks over at Chris. "What’s going on, Mr. Chris?"

Chris explains, "Each team will go back to the confessional and vote out a second team member with no discussion."

"What?!" Tamira responds. "Can you even do that?"

Grace shrugs and states, "If you haven’t noticed, Chris will basically do whatever he feels like."

Chris nods. ”That”s right. Alright, off to voting for you." The players begrudgingly leave the campfire ceremony one by one in order to vote.

The two teams are gathered back at the campfire ceremony after each voting for the second time. "Welcome back," Chris states, still with his usual smile. "The marshmallows are getting soggy, so let’s get this over with. We’ll begin with The Raging Bulls, once again." Chris produces another tray of marshmallows. Some of the contestants look annoyed, while some are shivering. Chris announces, "Jerome, Luke, Herman, Isaiah, and… Dirk are all safe." Chris tosses out the marshmallows, leaving just one. Chris announces, "It’s between Reginald and Brent, with one marshmallow remaining." Brent looks disengaged, while Reginald looks at his fellow team members and glares in their direction. "The last marshmallow belongs to…"

"Reginald." Reginald snaps his fingers and an intern brings him his marshmallow.

Brent blinks. He says, "Huh."

"My sincerest apologies, my fair Brent," Herman states. "I hath had nary an idea who to voteth out, but thou did state that you would be most content placing bettereth than average."

Brent thinks for a moment. "Twelfth out of twenty-five?" Brent shrugs his shoulders. "Yes. I suppose that is what I said.”

"Sorry, pal," Luke assures. “I was enjoying getting to know you. It’s just unfortunate like that we had to vote out two chaps."

Brent nods. He assures, "It’s fine. I’m fine." Brent shrugs. "Goodbye, everyone." Brent nods at the other contestants before leaving. The other players nod or wave back at him. Brent nonchalantly walks down to The Dock of Shame.

"I’m going to miss the little feller," Luke admits.

Isaiah scratches his head. He turns to Luke and asks, “I am sorry. I know I am new here, but was he on our team?"

Luke nods. He pauses. "I mean, I’m pretty darn sure?"

Chris states, "We have one last elimination to get to." Chris holds up another tray of marshmallows. "The Black Swans will lose one more team member." Chris tosses the first marshmallow to Quimberly. "Quimberly, you are safe." Chris closes one eye and points out to the contestants. "Next is… Grace and Blair." Chris holds up the tray with the final marshmallow on it. "That leaves Tamira and Zoe. The last marshmallow goes to…"

"Tamira." Tamira breathes a sigh of relief after catching her marshmallow.

Zoe frowns. "That stinks," she admits.

"Hey," Blair adds with a slight grimace, "at least you get to see Ruth, again."

Zoe smiles, again, and admits, "I guess that’s true." She turns toward the contestants. "I truly apologize if I offended any of you. Somebody special helped me realize I was being a little toxic toward a few of you. I know I’m not perfect, but I promise to be better. Bye, everyone." Zoe speed walks down The Dock of Shame with her bag around her shoulder and weights in both hands.

Isaiah admits, "I feel as if I am missing some important context."

Chris states, "Now you are all free to leave."

"This was the literal worst," Grace assures.

"Well," Chris replies, "at least you narrowed down the playing field, right?"

Grace puts a hand under her chin. She agrees, "I suppose that’s true."

On The Boat of Losers, Zoe joins the others. She explains, "I went back and wrestled this away from an intern." She holds an umbrella over herself and Ruth.

Ruth assures, "You’re so thoughtful."

Zoe responds, "I learned that from you." Ruth and Zoe giggle together.

Cary looks over at the women. He states, "Hey, Brent. I guess you and I are the third wheels tonight, huh?"

Brent replies, "Do you think my pecs have gotten bigger since this competition started?" Cary looks over at Brent attempting to zip his rain jacket over his chest, and his eyes show his surprise.

In confessional, a still wet Dirk explains, "Earlier, I went to see Bigby. I was sure I was going home, so I wanted to say goodbye… and to check up on Bones. He was busy at the time, but I should have a chance to see him again, after all."

Chris appears in front of the camera, still with an intern holding an umbrella. He states, "I had to fire the intern that Zoe stole the umbrella from. Anyway, we just saw another first for the series, a quadruple elimination! Or a quadrupilation…" Chris thinks for a moment. "I’ll need to sweatshop that. Anywho… Be sure to join us next time for more Total, more Drama, and more Worst of the Worst! Ha ha!"

### Chapter 10 - Wall or Nothing

Chris McLean appears on screen in a yellow raincoat and hat with his smile wide. He announces, "Welcome to an all-new, Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst! On our previous episode, the teams competed in an endurance test as some of their deepest, darkest secrets were revealed by our resident guru of gossip, Hedda." Hedda steps out of the bushes, holding an umbrella. Chris’ eyelids lower. He asks, "You’re still here?"

Hedda responds, "I am, sweetie. Try to contain your excitement."

"You are free to leave," Chris asserts.

Hedda nods. "I fully intend to," she assures. "After this." She turns toward a camera. "Is this my camera?" Hedda smiles wide. "I just learned that a certain long in the tooth television host, recently sold his likeness to a multibillion dollar pharmaceutical company. It turns out that most incoherent senior citizens relate to him. Who am I talking about?" Hedda innocently holds a finger to her cheek. "I’ll never tell."

Chris lowers his eyelids even more. "Let me rephrase that. Get out of here before I have an intern take that umbrella from you."

Hedda tilts her head with a smile and states, "That’s my cue. Goodbye to ‘Mr. McLean Colon’ himself."

After watching Hedda walk away, Chris smiles, again, before facing the camera. He continues, "As a result of a tie, both teams needed to visit the campfire ceremony. And in an unprecedented twist, thought up by yours truly, both teams were required to vote out two team members. This resulted in the series first quadrupilation where Cary, Ruth, Brent, and Zoe were voted out. What surprises are in store for our contestants this time on Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst!"

Luke is shown in confessional, the sound of rain hitting the roof of the confessional clearly audible. He admits as he looks up, "Golly. If this rain keeps up, I reckon the island should be renamed Total Drama Marshland." Luke laughs at his own joke. He clears his throat. "Lucky I brought my waders, on account of my needing to visit the medical tent every night." Luke stands up and gestures to his rubber pant and boot combination.

Dirk is shown sitting in a chair inside the main area in the medical tent. Nurse Bigby steps out looking down at a clipboard. He looks up to see a smiling Dirk wave at him, completely drenched from the rain. Bigby’s eyes get wide as he sees him. He states, "Dirk! What are you doing here?"

Dirk continues to smile. He explains, "I wasn’t about to break our date for tonight… Did you forget?"

Nurse Bigby shakes his head. He assures, "I was looking forward to it, but I took on extra work because I assumed you would stay at your cabin with this downpour."

Dirk shakes his head. "That? It’s just a sprinkle, or a mist at tops."

"You’re soaking wet," Bigby states. "Let’s get you out of those clothes."

Dirk blinks. He asks, "Right here in front of everybody?" Dirk shrugs and begins lifting up his shirt.

Bigby puts a hand on Dirk’s arm. He blushes a little and adds, "No, babe… I’ll get you a change of clothes. You can step right in there." Bigby points to a tent flap. Dirk looks at Bigby’s bicep with his eyebrows raised. "I’ll be back in a few." Bigby steps away.

Dirk turns his attention to the multiple tent flaps. He blinks. He points at the flaps, closes one eye, and says to himself as he shifts his index finger at each word, "My boyfriend told me to pick the right one and you are it…" Dirk shrugs and enters one of the flaps. He looks surprised as he enters. "Zane?"

Zane abruptly stands up from his chair and assures, "I was not sleeping, Nurse Bigby sir, no, sir!" He looks over at Dirk. He gives a sigh of relief. "Oh, Dirk, it’s just you."

"What are you doing here, bud?" Dirk asks.

Zane explains, "After Evan’s accident, Nurse Bigby needed more help since he wasn’t dealing with just a bunch of injured interns. He assigned me to stay in his room most of the time. He wanted someone to sit with him at all times at least until he regains consciousness."

Dirk looks over at Evan in his bed, his head bandaged, two bandaged arms propped up, and one bandaged leg propped up, and a blanket over him. Dirk gasps. He quietly states, "He really was pretty roughed up."

Zane rubs his head. "What are you…" Zane’s eyes light up. "I’ve been asking for someone to relieve me. Seems like Bigby finally got someone."

"Uh… I… What do I do?" Dirk asks.

Zane assures, "It’s easy. Just sit in that chair and don’t leave, really. He hasn’t moved the whole time I’ve been here which is great." Dirk blinks. "I mean…"

Dirk admits, "I don’t know if I’m really the right…"

Zane pats Dirk on the shoulder and states, "Thanks, pal. I really owe you one, and Nurse Bigby is going to love you for this."

Dirk’s eyes get wide. He states, "I’ll do it."

Zane nods. "I’ll be back tomorrow morning."

"Wait… tomorrow morning?" Dirk repeats, looking surprised. Zane waves before disappearing behind the tent flap.

Dirk looks over at Evan. He frowns. "As much as that guy grated my nerves, I still hate seeing him like this…" He looks down at his own soggy clothes, before removing his shirt and kicking his pants off.

Nurse Bigby opens the tent flap. He looks at Dirk in surprise. "Dirk? Why are you in here, and why are you…" His face turns bright red. He looks away from Dirk, standing around in his boxer briefs.

Dirk explains, "Zane needed someone to cover his job, and I volunteered."

"You did?" Bigby asks. "You know you didn’t have to… but that was very sweet of you." He holds up a hospital gown. "I brought you this. Sorry it’s not much, but it’s all I have." Bigby sighs. "I wish I could cut my shift short to be with you… I’m trying not to think about it… but I have a day off in a few days, and they finally gave me my own room, so I was thinking we could… maybe… hang out there?"

Dirk puts a hand to his chin. "That’s a step up from our date behind the dumpster the other night."

Bigby laughs. "Sorry about that. The break room was pretty full at the time."

Dirk shakes his head and admits, "It was still in the top three dates I’ve ever been on." Bigby laughs. He looks over at Evan. "Is he going to be okay?"

"I’m sorry you have to see him like that," Bigby apologizes. "I know he looks bad. He’ll be alright. Because of the rain, though, it looks like he’s going to be staying with us a little longer than I expected. The helicopter is not able to come out during the storm, and the water has been too choppy to safely transport him by boat."

Dirk frowns as he looks down. "The poor dude. I easily could have saved him…"

"Don’t think like that. It wasn’t anybody’s fault." Bigby places a hand on Dirk’s shoulder. Bigby states, "I have to go. Thanks again for this." He leans over and kisses Dirk on the cheek, before exiting the room.

Dirk sits down in his chair and puts a hand over his heart. "That dude is the best…"

Blair, Grace, Quimberly, and Tamira are seated on their beds in their cabin. "Anyone else feel bad about earlier?" Blair asks. "I mean, Ruth and Zoe didn’t really do anything that wrong."

"We’re, like, down to the wire, tbh," Tamira states. "We don’t have v many options. And like I said before, you have to be v cautious with couples in this game, and junk." Grace and Quimberly look to the side.

"Speaking of junk," Blair adds, "I didn’t know your husband was so cool!" Blair begins dancing awkwardly in place. "Maybe I can show him some of my sweet moves."

Tamira responds, "Uh… I’m sure he would like that…" Tamira shifts her eyes to the other side and quietly says, "JK."

"What do we think is coming next?” Blair asks, she looks over at Quimberly.

"I have no idea," Quimberly replies. "I’ve never seen a single episode of this show." The others look shocked.

Grace rubs her chin. "I don’t want to jinx it, but I have a hunch."

"Girl, it’s barely noticeable," Tamira responds. "Just don’t;t wear anything backless." Grace looks surprised before glaring at Tamira.

In the men’s cabin, Luke tries to quietly enter his team’s cabin. He sees Reginald lying on his bed facing the wall. Luke sits on his own bed and overhears Isaiah and Herman talking. Isaiah states, "I was quite surprised at Reginald’s reaction to his secret. I have not been in a similar situation, but I imagine I would be most disheartened."

Herman nods. He adds, "I verily agree. I wish I could be so hardened, but alas, I am not but a hopeless romantic."

"Hopeless is right," Jerome adds. "I’m trying to get my beauty sleep, not that there’s anything I can improve, but I have a standard to maintain, boo."

"Ah!" Isaiah apologizes, "My sincerest apologies."

"You will hear nary a peep from us," Herman says.

"I know that’s right," Jerome adds. Luke looks over at Reginald again, who is holding an alligator plushie tightly.

In confessional, Luke admits, "I feel I done seen that gator before." He raises an eyebrow and scratches his forehead. "I reckon I can’t place it… I wish I had a memory like that Brett feller. Oh, well. It does remind me of my alligator wrestling days. Does that count for something?"

Dirk is shown sitting in his chair. Zane and Bigby step into Evan’s room. Dirk looks at them. He says, "Oh, hey, guys. What are you doing here?"

Zane explains, "It’s morning."

"It is?" Dirk asks. "I guess time flies when you’re staring at an unconscious person all night."

"Ah," Zane responds. "My favorite old adage." Zane frowns. "You stayed up all night? Doing what?"

Dirk nods. He states, “I had a job to do." Dirk turns and points up. "I did change that light bulb at some point, though."

Zane comments, "You know those hospital gowns tie up in the back, right?" Zane looks over at a blushing Nurse Bigby.

Bigby awkwardly says, "I appreciate your help. I’m sure your teammates are missing you."

Dirk looks to the side and quietly says, "They probably didn’t even notice I was gone." Zane raises an eyebrow.

Bigby remembers, "Oh, right. I forgot. I brought your clothes. Nice and dry."

Zane explains, "He put them near an intern that has a fever of a hundred and three."

Bigby continues, "I also brought you an umbrella. I have a feeling this rain is going to last a while." Dirk blushes as he takes the items from Bigby.

On the opposite side of the room, Zane holds up a sheet from a heart rate monitor. He asks, "Is it normal for this to spike like this?"

Bigby walks over and states, "Let me look at that."

Dirk says, "I’m just in the way here. I’m going to see myself out."

Dirk is shown in confessional as he struggles to close his umbrella. He admits, "I don’t see what Nurse Bigby sees in me. I want to be a good guy like him, and all, but it doesn’t come naturally to everybody… The guys are only keeping me around because we got a secret Boney Island pact going on." He looks to the side, and then back at the camera. "You know what. This ends here. I am worthy. I deserve to still be here. I am not… the most terrible person that’s ever walked the planet. I finally have someone in my life that makes me want to work at being a better person, and I’m going to do it." Dirk throws a fist into the air to emphasize his enthusiasm.

As Dirk arrives at his cabin, Luke states, "Oh there you are, buddy. We were wondering where you were."

"You were?" Dirk asks, his eyebrows raised.

"We were?" Herman asks.

Luke states, "Darn right. Esme done told us to dress up for an important party, or something. They provided us some party duds."

Herman adds with a pout, "And alas, nary a tunic among them."

Jerome states, "It’s a good thing I look good in whatever I wear." Jerome puts on a light blue blazer.

Gathered in a tent decorated with steamers and balloons, Esme tells the contestants, "Gather around, everyone! We’re here today to celebrate… You guessed it! You’re teams are now merged." The contestants cheer.

"The merge is always a landmark of a season," Blair states in confessional. "Everyone is always excited to make it that far, because…" Blair pauses. "I’m not really sure why, exactly. All I can say is that I feel tingly all over, and I hope it’s because I made the merge this time, and not because this is a spider bite." Blair holds up her arm to reveal a red mark. She winces.

Tamira and Quimberly stand together in the corner of the tent. Tamira looks uneasy as she holds a cup of punch. She says, "I’m feeling nervous about this merge. We are down in numbers, four to six. That’s more than, like, half."

Quimberly asks, "Why are you talking to me?" Quimberly takes a sip from a cup of punch.

Tamira frowns. She replies, "IDK." She takes a sip from her punch.

Jerome steps in between Tamira and Quimberly. He playfully states, "Hey, girl, hey!" Tamira jumps. "What are you drinking, fam?"

Tamira looks at her punch and squints her eyes. "I think it’s… orange?"

Jerome states, "Girl, you cray." Jerome looks over at Blair and Grace awkwardly standing near the entrance. "Hey, I’m going to go mingle with some of my sisters from other misters. Ttyl." Jerome saunters off.

Tamira blinks. She comments, "Hey. Acronyms are totes my thing." Tamira scratches the side of her head. "Did Jerome seem a lot friendlier than usual? Like… Noticeably." Tamira stares after him. She stands in awkward silence. She looks over and is startled to realize that Quimberly is no longer standing with her.

Herman and Isaiah stand to the side of the tent. Herman admits, "Like the greatest of tragedies, I have always been most awkward at these sort of… how doth I put this in commoner terms… ‘boy girl parties’."

Isaiah nods in agreement. "I too am accustomed to being the ‘new guy’, and not knowing how to insert myself."

Herman blinks. He responds, "My sincerest of apologies, but I think you mean ‘assert’."

Isaiah sighs. "See what I mean?" Herman nods. Reginald looks over at the two men standing by themselves. His lip curls up into a smirk.

In confessional, Reginald explains to the camera, "I have a fairly solid alliance going with Jerome and Dirk, my fellow Boney Islanders…" Reginald pauses for a moment. "God, I hate that phrase." He clears his throat. "But daddy always told me to keep my options open." Reginald looks to the side. "I believe he was referring to business, and not his open marriage." Reginald clears his throat again, as he raises a hand over his mouth. "I digress. I do have being a midseason returnee in common with Sir Herman, and the strapping Isaiah. That’s something I need to capitalize on."

Back at the merge party, Reginald continues to look toward Herman and Isaiah. His concentration is broken as Luke blurts out, "Golly! They really have something for everyone." He holds up a roasted hog’s head. "Who wants to dare me to shove this whole darn thing in my mouth?" Reginald’s left eye twitches.

Blair and Grace talk together. Blair asks, "What did you say this fancy cream cheese was called, again?"

"Neufchâtel cheese," Grace answers, looking fairly disinterested.

Blair grins. "Neufchâtel? More like ‘newfangled’! Am I right?" Grace does not respond. Blair raises her arm in the air. "Up top." Grace does not react.

Jerome walks in between Blair and Grace and puts his arms around their shoulders. He greets, "Hey, gorg!"

"Gorg? More like gorging myself on these snacks, am I right?" Blaire replies. Jerome tightens his grip around Blair’s neck with his arm. "Ack!"

Jerome states, "I’m excited to finally work with you both. Boney Island Gang for life."

Grace smiles. "Oh, right. How many of us are left? Five out of ten? What are the odds?"

"About half," Blair replies. Jerome tightens his grip around her neck, again.

Grace adds, "I’m not gonna lie. I was worried when I realized The Black Swans were coming into the merge at a numbers disadvantage."

Jerome laughs and shakes his head. He states, "Boo, I got you."

Grace states in confessional, "Jerome is my boy from way back. We’ve known each other for close to ten years, now." Grace sighs. "Has it been that long, already?" She now looks thoughtful. "To think that bond could help the women out of a difficult spot." Grace smiles and flips her hair with her hand, and then gestures her by bending her wrist forward. "We got this."

Esme stands in the center of the tent wearing a heavily sequined, yellow party dress. She announces, "Everyone gather round." The remaining contestants approach the assistant host. "Now is time for your first challenge as individuals." Some of the players cheer.

Dirk states, "Now we don’t have to worry about the deadweight." Dirk blinks, and looks flustered. He turns to Herman. "No offense, Herman."

"Don’t give it nary a thought," Herman responds with a smile. He frowns and looks to the side. "You embossed carbuncle…"

Esme explains, "The challenge is simple. Each of you will stand on a ledge, against a wall. The last player to not fall will win individual invincibility!"

"That’s it?" Quimberly asks. She folds her arms. "This is going to be so easy."

Esme rubs her hands together. "We have a few surprises in store. Please follow me to the building where the challenge will take place."

The contestants are shown standing against a brick wall. Esme states, "Looks like everyone is ready. The challenge is underway."

"Under where?" Blair asks. Some of the others laugh. Blair also laughs.

In confessional, Blair states, "Why were we all laughing?" She shifts her eyes in various directions.

Dirk states from the wall, "This is a cakewalk. My calves were made for this." Dirk does a squat, but loses his balance and is the first to fall from the wall.

Herman stifles a laugh. He comments, "Pardon my boldness, but it appears that more wispy frames are at an advantage in this game." Herman’s eyes widen as he too falls from the wall.

Dirk reaches down and states, "Here. Let me help you up. I don’t want you to break your little twig arms by trying to stand by yourself." Herman glares at Dirk.

Dirk comments in confessional, "And here I thought this being nice thing was going to be a challenge." Dirk lets out a laugh.

Esme announces, "We now have five players remaining. Quimberly… A surprise to no one. Blair… A surprise to everyone."

"Me, too," Blair assures with a nod. "I’m sure my parents are, too."

Esme continues, "Jerome, Luke, and Reginald."

Blair states, "I think my time is up. Have fun with this, all."

Reginald smirks and states, "Rookie mistake. Daddy says never to give up when your back is against the wall." He turns toward Jerome. "Aren’t you in pain, Jerome?"

Jerome shakes his head. He explains, "I’ve stood three days in line for a moisturizer release. This is nothing, boo."

"I thought you said you had a surprise in store for us?" Blair states to Esme.

"Oh, I almost forgot," Esme states. "Thanks, Blair." She turns to the side, "Fire!"

Cannons filled with green slime are fired at the contestants. Jerome shrieks, before falling from the wall. "What is this!"

Esme assures, "It has exfoliating properties…" Esme looks to the side, "… probably."

Jerome stands up. He states, "Really?" He laughs. He confidently adds, "I think I handled that well."

Reginald frowns. He comments, "This challenge puts the low in lowbrow." He leans back and slowly slides down the wall and onto the ground, his arms folded the entire time.

Esme announces, "We’re down to our final two, Quimberly and Luke."

Luke states, "Gosh. Really? I guess my glutes are adding extra cushion." Luke looks over at Quimberly. "Golly. Is that Quimberly or a scarecrow? I haven’t done seen her move since this here challenge began."

Reginald wipes himself off with a towel. "Is it just me, or is country boy’s accent getting more ridiculous?"

Suddenly, another shot is fired from the cannons, this time the slime is pink. Luke looks surprised as the impact seems to cause him to become unsteady. He falls forward, his protective glasses falling from his face.

Esme announces, "And with that, Quimberly is the winner of individual invincibility!" The others cheer.

"It’s not a big deal," Quimberly insists.

Esme explains, "Everyone will meet with Chris tonight, where one of you will sadly be eliminated."

In the men’s cabin, Reginald, Isaiah, and Herman are alone. Isaiah asks, "Where are the other men?"

Reginald states, "They went to clean off that slime."

Isaiah scratches the back of his head. "I cannot help but feel left out…"

"Speaking of which," Reginald replies. "Each of us are at a unique disadvantage. We rejoined the game late. We missed a crucial chance to bond with our team members. How say you that we form a pact to join forces and vote together?"

Herman heaves a sigh of relief. He states, "Yay, verily. I must admit I was quite unnerved about my position since the merge."

The men put their hands together to signify their new allegiance. "So then…" Isaiah asks, "Who do we vote for? One of the women?" Reginald shakes his head. "Dirk?" Reginald shakes his head. "Jerome?" Reginald shakes his head.

"That means…" Herman begins. Reginald nods.

"Look." Reginald explains, "I like the… gentleman… And he has his… charms, but Jerome told me that that could be dangerous now that we’ve merged. We need to be wary of anyone that might possibly join the other side."

Isaiah frowns. He admits, "This will most assuredly be a tough one."

At the campfire ceremony, Chris smiles as the contestants walk in. He frowns. "What is everyone doing here?"

Blair explains, "We’re here to vote someone out. Last time I checked, that was the standard process." She leans toward Grace, covers her mouth with a hand, and says, "I think the poor guy is finally losing it."

"Who won the challenge?" Chris asks, with an arched eyebrow.

"Quimberly did," Herman answers.

Chris blinks. "So The Black Swans won? Why are you here?"

Grace explains with a confused look, "Chris, we merged. There was a party."

Chris shakes his head with a frown. He responds, "I didn’t give the go ahead on that."

"Esme announced it, though," Luke states. He looks confused. "Am I remembering right?"

"What does it matter?" Reginald asks. "We’re all ready to vote someone out."

Chris states, "The merge happens when I say it happens, not when Esme says it happens. She doesn’t have that authority. Quimberly earned invincibility for her team. The men must vote one of their team members out."

Blair frowns. She says, "Shucks. And we were planning to blindside Reginald with Jerome’s help and everything."

"You what?!" Reginald asks. He glares at Jerome.

Jerome laughs nervously. "You know how Blair kids, sugar boo. You know you can’t take her seriously."

Blair continues, "No way. I’m dead serious. Remember how you secretly met with us about a half hour ago and how you wanted to join the women, and trick the men to waste their vote on old Lukey boy? You said you were tired of all the testosterone, and how Luke barely ever secures the back of his long johns, and how Isaiah over enunciates every word, and how Dirk inexplicably smells like motor oil, and how Herman’s voice cracking gets on your, and I quote, ‘last nerve, boo’, and how Reginald has let the game go to his head? Don’t you remember that? And how you said Frederick should introduce him to his plastic surgeon to fix his oddly shaped nose? Remember?"

Jerome has a hand over his face as the other men join Reginald in glaring at him. "Thanks a lot, Blair."

Blair smiles and tilts her head. She assures, "Any time."

"Let’s get to the vote, shall we?" Chris states with a wicked smile.

The scene abruptly changes to Jerome sitting on The Boat of Losers, with one hand propping up his head, and the other well manicured hand tapping the side of the boat.

Chris looks on as the boat escorts Jerome to Playa Des Losers. Chris turns to the contestants. He laughs and says, "That was awesome!"

"I did something bad, didn’t I?" Blair asks. The women nod, as they look at her disapprovingly.

Chris states, "And with that, eh… I guess you can merge. Have a great night’s sleep, campers." Chris turns to the camera, wearing yellow rain gear as the rain shows no sign of stopping, and states, "Be sure to tune in next time for another all new, all thrilling episode of Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst!"

### Chapter 11 - Heaven Sentai

Chris smiles and announces, "Welcome to an all new Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst! Our contestants’ backs were against the wall… literally! In an epic endurance challenge, our campers endured the pain and splattering paint. Quimberly was the winner, which was a surprise to no one. In an actual surprise, due to a premature decision from my assistant host, Esme, the contestants mistakenly thought the two teams had merged."

Esme looks down as she holds on to her clipboard. "Sorry, Mr. McLean."

Chris laughs. He adds, "Eh. All is forgiven… Since it made for great television, in the long run. The Black Swans earned invincibility, and a stunned, flip flopping Jerome got a one way ticket to Playa des Losers thanks to Blair’s loose lips." Chris laughs, again. "The actual merge is now in effect, and the players will now be playing as individuals. In what has been a season full of twists, and unexpected eliminations, be sure to stay tuned for what’s next!"

Grace shakes her head. She adds, "Blair, girl. I wish I knew what was going on in that head of yours."

Blair thoughtfully looks upward and to the side. "Nobody’s ever asked me that before… Let’s see… I’ve always wondered… Why do inflammable and flammable mean basically the same thing? And do you really think that when dinosaurs said ‘rawr!’ that they really meant ‘I love you’?"

Grace says with a slight huff. "I retract my earlier statement."

Quimberly reminds, "She means about spilling the beans about Jerome."

Blair looks over at Quimberly. "Beans?" She responds, "Oh, that! I don’t know what came over me. When everything fell through, I just thought the plan didn’t matter, anymore. I really hope you all can forgive me."

Quimberly replies, "You don’t have to explain anything to me. I don’t care who goes home, as long as I can play from the bottom."

Blair replies, "That’s a relief." She holds her stare at Quimberly, and then quickly looks away from the purple haired woman. "Excuse me for looking at you for so long…" She rubs her eyes. "It’s like staring directly at the sun." Grace glares at Blair.

In confessional, Grace explains, "I’m not forgiving Blaire so easily. Jerome was our best shot at beating the guys." Grace thinks for a moment. "Maybe now that Tamira is less insecure about her husband’s career choices, she would be willing to bring Isaiah into our alliance." Grace’s face lights up. She lowers her eyelids and looks to the side. "Not that who it is really makes all that much of a difference to me personally, or anything."

In the men’s cabin, Reginald opens his luggage, and pulls out one of his polo shirts. Herman asks, "Thou packed thy bags, noble Reginald?"

Reginald admits, "I may come across as arrogant, but one should always be prepared for anything."

In confessional, Reginald admits, "I really wasn’t actually concerned about being eliminated. I just wanted to give that facade to my competitors. It was an attempt to appear more… human." Reginald shudders. "However, it appears that I was indeed in danger of going home, if Jerome got his way." Reginald glares to the side. "Just when I thought I could start trusting people in this game…"

Dirk stoops down next to Reginald and picks up a stuffed alligator. He asks, "This yours, Reg?"

Reginald reaches out, and begins, "It…"

Isaiah interrupts, "Ah, yes. Was that not what you were holding in the picture with your exboyfriend?" Isaiah nods. "I never forget a photograph."

"One might sayeth thou hath a photographic memory,"  Herman adds with a smirk. He turns to Reginald. "It doth appear that thou are not a sooth sayer."

"What’s that now?" Luke asks, the comment clearly perplexing the farmer.

Herman explains, "It means he lied about being over his ex." Luke appears to understand.

"Um…" Reginald reacts. "You are all mistaken. That stuffed alligator is not mine."

"Yeah?" Dirk asks.

Isaiah says, "I was most certain…"

Reginald nods. He states, "I assure you that the others are misremembering. I most certainly have no attachment to that cheap toy… or my ex."

Dirk shrugs. "Anyone else’s?" The other men shake their heads. He states, "Alright, stellar. I know someone who will love this little iguana…"

"It’s an alligator," Reginald insists.

Dirk states, "Or whatever it is... Anyway… Peace out, bros." Dirk throws on a raincoat and exits the cabin carrying an umbrella. Reginald’s eyes are wide.

"Maybe I am still unfamiliar with Canadian customs, but is walking out in the middle of the night and in the pouring rain a common occurrence?" Isaiah asks, with a raised eyebrow.

"Nope," Luke replies. He continues, "Well, fellers, I got my waders on. If you’re asleep by the time I get back, I hope your dreams are sweeter than the sweetest of sweet potatoes." Luke leaves the cabin.

Isaiah looks over at Herman and Reginald. "Is it not a coincidence that the three of us are alone together?"

"Yes, dear brethren," Herman chimes in. "We must be sure to take advantage of this t…"

Reginald has on some expensive looking rain gear on. He states, "Uh. It almost slipped my mind. I need to run outside in order to do…" Reginald expression looks blank. "Wealthy people things." Reginald abruptly exits. Herman and Isaiah look at each other with wide eyes.

In the women’s cabin, Tamira heaves a deep sigh. Grace asks, "What’s bugging you? Is it the whole Jerome fiasco?"

Tamira nods. She laments, "He was our shot at flipping this thing, fr. I just wish we had some other option."

Grace lowers her eyelids. She replies, "If only we had some kind of connection to the guys."

Tamira frowns. She places a hand under her chin. "Yeah… I think Herman and I wear the same eyeliner. That could be something."

Grace slaps her own forehead. "I mean… maybe there’s an existing connection, or… relation we could exploit?"

"Wait…" Tamira raises her eyebrows. "Do you think Luke and I are related, or something? OMG! Do you think he could be a half brother I never knew about?" Tamira sighs. "What am I saying? Reality tv is cruel, but they would never do something like that without our knowing…"

Grace rubs her temples. She responds, "No, I mean…" She sighs. "I can’t with this, right now."

"I agree," Tamira replies. "The stress is not helping your scowl lines." Grace glares at Tamira.

Reginald wanders by himself in the rain. He looks from side to side. He frowns. "This glorified marsh is kind of… creepy at night." He holds up a flashlight, and jumps as someone approaches him. He drops the flashlight to the ground. Reginald hectically shouts, "Please. I have nothing to offer you!" He blinks. He begins unzipping his raincoat. "You can have my designer underwear. Just don’t hurt me."

The other person holds up Reginald’s flashlight. "Golly." Luke holds up the flashlight. "You can keep your drawers. Why would I want to hurt you?" Luke holds out the flashlight to Reginald. "I reckon you’re going to want this."

"Thank you," Reginald responds, as he takes back his flashlight. He clears his throat. "I should be going."

"That reminds me," Luke replies. "What are you doing out here? You don’t seem like someone that enjoys being wet… or dirty… or not well lit…"

Reginald forces a smile, which makes Luke wince. Reginald insists, "Oh, me? I was just aimlessly wandering."

"Gee," Luke responds. "Well, I have me a destination. I’m heading over to the medical tent on account of me needing my medicine. I’d invite you to join me, and all, but it seems like too much of a set course for ya."

Reginald nods. "Yes, your assertion would be accurate." Luke scratches his head. "I’ll just be making my departure…"

"Alright," Luke replies. "I’ll tell Dirk you said ‘howdy’."

"Dirk?" Reginald asks. "You expect to see him?"

Luke nods. "Gosh, yes. I reckon I done seen him every night at the medical tent for the last week or so."

Reginald raises an eyebrow. "What is he doing there?"

Luke shrugs his shoulders. "He mentioned someone he had feelings for, or something, but I reckon it isn’t any of my business." Reginald raises an eyebrow. "I only ever see him with Nurse Bigby, so I don’t really have any idea who it might be."

Reginald looks to the side. He mutters, "Whoever it is must be who he is giving Allie the Gator to…"

Luke blankly responds, "What’s that, now?"

Reginald shakes his head. He states, "I have changed my mind. I will indeed do you the honor of accompanying you, tonight."

Luke shrugs and responds with a forced smile, "Gee… I’m happy to have ya." Luke looks over and says, "Golly, look at the size of that spider." Reginald shrieks and drops his flashlight, again. "Oop. Sorry. I reckon it was just a leaf now that I got a better gander at it." Reginald glares toward Luke. The two men begin walking together.

Reginald asks, "So you work on a farm? How very… quaint."

Luke laughs. He replies, "Not sure what that means, but… Thank’m. Not many left these days, what with the changes to the industry, and all. Hard for the smaller farms to compete against Big Farma. That’s what we in the business call corporate agriculture."

"I suppose, I haven’t thought about that," Reginald responds. "I believe my family owns some of those, if I remember correctly." He pauses. "Uh… Have you ever considered a different career?"

"Gosh, no," Luke assures without any hesitation. "Sure, it’s a lot of hard work, sometimes, but I can’t imagine not living off the land. Nothing like watching the sunrise everyday, and rolling in the mud with the hogs." Reginald’s eye twitches. "What about you? It must be right nice living in a fancy mansion, or whatever." Luke holds back a branch so Reginald can pass.

Reginald responds, "I’m afraid I’m not cut out for anything more rustic. I don’t think I would survive one day on the farm. Speaking of which… How does your family farm stay afloat?"

Luke looks confused. "It’s on land."

"No, what I mean is…" Reginald begins.

"Gosh, we’re already here." Luke lets go of the branch early, and it hits Reginald directly in the face.

Inside the tent, Reginald’s face is examined by Nurse Bigby as Luke sits on the side. Nurse Bigby explains, "The branch caused a few minor abrasions, but you’ll be alright." Reginald glares at Luke, who forces a smile.

Reginald responds, "Thank you, Nurse." Reginald raises an eyebrow. "You seem more than adequate at your job."

Luke assures, "Bigby is the best. Very professional like." Luke turns to Bigby. "That reminds me… Have you seen Dirk, around, tonight?"

"Oh, Dirk," Bigby places a hand on his head. "He said he was going to leave me something in the break room." Reginald raises an eyebrow. "I’ve been meaning to meet up with him, but there’ve been more injuries than usual, tonight."

"So you and Dirk…" Reginald begins.

Nurse Bigby’s rosy cheeks turn slightly more red. He responds, "Yup."

Reginald blinks. "And it’s voluntary on your part?" Bigby nods with a smile. Luke looks back and forth, looking completely confused.

In confessional, Luke states, "Golly. Those fellas conversation had me spinning around more than a day old calf on roller skates." He pauses. "Not that we’ve ever done that…"

Reginald blinks. He asks the nurse, "Doesn’t this show seem a little beneath you? This isn’t exactly a reputable program."

Bigby blushes. He assures, "I’m totally content here. Every day is an adventure. I like not knowing what is going to happen each day."

Reginald adds, "Like whether or not Chris will pay you this week?" Reginald reaches into his pocket. "I have been looking for a new private live in nurse."

"What are the qualifications?" Bigby asks.

Reginald blushes slightly. He admits, "You definitely meet them. Here’s my card." Nurse Bigby takes the card from Reginald. "Now if you’ll excuse me, I have important business to attend to." Reginald exits the room.

Bigby states, "Hold tight, Luke. I’ll go retrieve your medication." Luke holds a hand up to his forehead and salutes. Before he exits the tent flap, Nurse Bigby looks down at the business card before placing it in his shirt pocket.

In confessional, Reginald explains, "I had a strong feeling that Dirk might have left Allie the Gator…" He looks to the side. "Gordon named him…" He looks forward at the camera. "For that unnervingly handsome male nurse." Reginald looks aside, again. "He’s exactly Dirk’s type…" He assures, "Oh, I know. Anyway… Next was just finding that break room before anyone espied me. It’s unfortunate all these tent flaps look the same…"

Reginald removes his face from a tent flap, after a scream. He apologizes, "Sorry, madam. My mistake." He rubs his eyes. "That’s not something I shall soon burn from my retina." The well to do twenty something makes his way to another tent flap on the opposite side. He takes a deep breath, before sticking his head inside. He quickly emerges and doubles back. He stumbles backward, across the entire room before falling backward, flat on his back. His head falling through a tent flap.

"Reggie?!" Dirk shouts. "What happened to you? What are you doing here?"

"The amount of viscera I just witnessed, no man should ever be subjected to…" Reginald groggily states. Dirk hurries to help Reginald to his feet. "Thanks."

"No problem, man," Dirk replies. "You took a pretty hard tumble. Let’s get you a seat."

"No, I’m okay, I have to find…" Reginald’s mouth drops slightly as he looks in the corner of the room. He mutters, "Is that… Evan?"

Dirk responds with a nod. "Looks pretty rough, doesn’t he? A wonder he didn’t break in half…"

"It almost looks like he did," Reginald responds quietly.

Dirk uncomfortably adds, "Uh… anyway…"

"Why are you here?" Reginald asks.

"A favor for a friend," Dirk explains. He looks down. "They want someone to sit with him in case anything happens. I don’t think he’s woken up, yet."

Reginald frowns and says, "How very… unfortunate…"

Dirk nods. "Well, I appreciate your… dropping in. It can be kind of lonely here, and all, not that I’m not happy to do it… It’s the least I can do. It sounded like you were looking for something, so don’t feel obligated to stay." Reginald nods. He looks over at Evan, again. His eyes widen when he notices his stuffed alligator placed to the far side of Evan’s head. "What were you looking for, if you don’t mind my asking?"

Reginald hesitates. He replies, "It’s… not important." Dirk shrugs. He nods before Reginald exits the tent flap. Reginald releases a heavy sigh.

Luke loudly states, "Howdy, Reg!"

Reginald jumps. He replies, "Egad! What are you trying to do? Wake Evan?"

Luke blinks. "Golly. Wouldn’t that be a good thing?"

Reginald thinks for a moment. He responds, "I guess you’re right. Well, I suppose I will make my leave. I’ve never been a big fan of hospitals."

Luke assures, "You get used to it after a while, I reckon. I’m good to go, too. Mind if I join you on the venture back this time, pard?"

"If you must," Reginald replies. Luke lets out a loud laugh, as he slaps Reginald on the back.

Outside, the men walk through the rain. Luke abruptly says, "Golly. Did you find what you were looking for?"

Reginald assures, "Never you mind."

Luke looks surprised. He responds, "Sorry if I was overstepping my bounds. I really need to learn to mind my own business."

Reginald looks over at look. He sighs. "You’re okay. My apologies for responding so curtly."

Luke blinks. "Kurt… who… Anywho… We got interrupted earlier… I believe you asked me how my family stays in business…"

"Oh, right," Reginald answers. "That was before we even got to the medical tent. If you ever need a loan, or some sort of grant…"

Luke puts his arms behind his head as he follows after Reginald. "Nah, we’re really not struggling… It’s not on account of any special skill on my family’s part, as much as I love them."

"I’m sure that’s not true," Reginald assures.

Luke responds, "Well, you and me aren’t completely unalike."

Reginald stops walking. He asks, "What do you mean?"

Luke looks down, as he stops walking, as well. "I don’t like telling people, besides my friends, but… after my accident my family done hired a lawyer. We sued the medical establishment that botched my surgery."

"You mean?" Reginald asks.

"Now, I ain’t no billionaire like you," Luke assures, "but let’s just say my family doesn’t have to worry where their next meal is coming from… I suppose partly because we run a farm, and all."

Reginald clarifies, "I’m not a billionaire." His eyes dart to the side. "Why are you telling me this? Just because I asked?"

Luke shakes his head. "Nah, nothing like that. I tell most of my friends."

"Friends?" Reginald repeats. They begin walking, again. Luke nods. "But why do you work so hard when you don’t need to?"

Luke replies, "I reckon I don’t know how much longer I’ll have my strength, and it’s what I enjoy doing. My family, too. It’s what we know. I reckon it’s what we love."

Reginald looks back at Luke for a moment. "You are something special."

"Oh, I don’t know about all that," Luke responds with a chuckle. "I don’t know how the others might react to it. I feel really fortunate to be in the game this long, though. Last time really hurt being cut so early, you know?"

Reginald quietly says, "Yes. I do."

Luke points out, "Hey, looks like we’re almost home."

Reginald states, "You go on ahead. I have to make a quick stop at the confessional."

"You sure?" Luke asks. "I don’t mind joining y…"

"Go on, git," Reginald insists.

Luke holds his hands up and backs away. He says with a laugh, "You sound right serious. Be real careful out there, now." Reginald nods. He looks thoughtfully at Luke, before turning the other direction.

In confessional, Reginald explains, "What Luke confided in me was most unexpected… I didn’t realize he viewed me as a… friend…" He looks thoughtful for a moment. "I suppose in the context of the game, I could use that information to my advantage." Reginald looks straight ahead, his eyes quickly getting wide. He holds his face in his hands. "What am I even saying?"

The following day, the contestants are gathered, each wearing a helmet and bodysuit in a different color. Esme looks up at the sky. She explains, "It looks like the rain is finally clearing up. I almost thought we would have to cancel this challenge. I was so looking forward to it."

"Something is bothering me about these costumes," Blair comments.

An annoyed Reginald suggests, "Could it be that my costume just happens to be yellow, and Isaiah’s costume is black? Or perhaps it is the large rainbow emblazoned on my chest?!"

"No, no. I think you’re just overanalyzing things… Is it just me, or are the guy’s costumes really tight?" Blair asks with a hand covering her mouth from the side. Her eyes are wide as she stares at an embarrassed looking Dirk.

"I picked them out myself," Esme assures with an awkward smile.

Grace rolls her eyes. "And the world is in complete disbelief."

Esme warns, "Be careful with them. They’re dry clean only."

Dirk mutters, "Why is Blair looking at me all googly eyed?"

Reginald says from the side of his mouth, "Now you know how it feels."

Dirk’s eyes quickly turn toward Reginald. "What’s that, now?" Reginald smirks.

Dirk states in confessional, "Maybe Reginald has a point. Maybe I should control myself a little, now that I have a boyfriend, and everything." Dirk smiles as he waves at the camera. "No guy compares to Nurse Bigby, anyway…" Dirk sighs.

"Tacky costumes, huh?" Quimberly states toward Herman.

Herman’s eyes get wide. "Art thou jesting?"

"Uh, yes?" Quimberly responds.

Herman laughs. "Of course, thou wert." He tugs on his body suit. "We art adorned as ye olde Lucky Seven! Only the most iconic sentai, super powered battlers of the galaxy!"

Luke sticks out his lower lip. "I may be wrong, but I count nine of us."

Herman explains, "They added more as the show gained in popularity."

Luke responds with, "Ah."

Herman turns to Quimberly, "And thou, dear lady, are dressed as the most important and limited edition sentai of all."

"I am?" Quimberly asks, with a raised brow.

Herman nods rapidly. "Yes! You art portraying White Gold!" Quimberly’s costume is mostly white with gold accents, and some depictions of pots of gold. "It’s an honor to simply be in thou’s presence." He falls to one knee and takes her hand in his.

"Uh, well, I really don’t know…" Quimberly replies.

Tamira leans toward Grace. She asks, "Do you see what I see?"

Grace responds, "That you’re wearing red? It is not your color."

"You’re not wrong," Tamira responds. "It makes my skin look pinkish, and what is with these balloon decals?" Tamira stops herself. "No. I meant how Quimberly is acting. It’s very strange for her."

"At least a different kind of strange from her usual brand," Grace adds.

Tamira suggests, "I think maybe Herman weirds her out, or something." Grace nods.

Grace states, "Maybe we should try keeping them separated."

"She would totes appreciate that." Tamira says, "Hey, about our conversation before about getting one of the guys on our side?" Grace nods, not looking enthused. "I think I may have thought of someone."

"Let me guess. Dirk?" Grace asks.

"Ew, no," Tamira responds. She points at Isaiah.

"What, really?" Grace responds in disbelief.

Tamira admits, "I don’t think I’ve mentioned it, but we are kinda sorta related."

"You don’t say," Grace says with an eye roll.

Tamira scoffs. "Um, I did say. You better start paying attention." Grace glares at Tamira. "But leave the alliance talk to me. I’m like totes his favorite person."

"I didn’t think you were anyone’s favorite person, but your own," Grace comments with a smirk. Tamira glares at her.

Tamira looks at her gloved hand. "I mean, I do have excellent taste, if that’s what you’re implying." Grace rolls her eyes, again.

Esme explains, "Each contestant will be pursued by our expert team of Total Drama veterans."

"I didn’t know anyone from the military ever competed on this show," Blair states with a surprised expression.

Esme sighs. "I mean, Total Drama alumni."

Blair replies, "Then why didn’t you just say that?" She looks to the side, and places her hands on her hips. "Some people just don’t know how to use their words effectively."

Esme sighs, again. "Each of you will try to evade capture, be it by outsmarting, outrunning, or outmaneuvering your potential captors."

"I thought it was outwit, outplay, outlast," Isaiah states as he scratches his head. "Or am I thinking of another program?"

"So this is just a glorified game of hide and go seek?" Reginald asks. "I stopped playing that child’s game in my early twenties."  The others look at him with concerned looks. He asks, "What?"

Esme continues, "The challenge is over once all but one contestant is captured, or if production decides that the challenge has gone on long enough."

"Then who shalt be victorious in that scenario?" Herman asks, as he raises an arm in the air.

"I guess whoever is judged as having performed the best," Esme responds with a shrug. "We’ll cross that bridge if we get to it, I guess." Grace folds her arms and raises an eyebrow. "You all may hide mostly anywhere on the island, just not inside any buildings. So if no one has any further questions… You can all get a head start, so on your marks…"

"I hath a question!" Herman states, again with his arm raised.

"Yeah," Blair states adamantly. "Who is Mark?"

Herman shakes his head. "Who art we hiding from? How whilst we know who to avoid?"

Esme assures with a smile, "Oh, I think you’ll especially know."

Herman dances in place. He states, "Ooh! This is all most exhilarating!" Quimberly smiles as she looks at him.

"Campers… are… Go!" Esme announces as she lowers her arm. The contestants mostly scurry off, as Quimberly casually walks away.

Herman is shown walking by himself. He has a hand under his chin. "Where shall I be less detected by those scamps?"

"Greetings, Herman," Reginald states as he walks up. "I like your purple costume."

Herman replies, "Thank you. It’s violet, but…" He tugs at his violet costume decorated with white horseshoes.

"Did you think up a hiding place, yet?" Reginald asks. Herman shakes his head. "Really? I honestly came to see if you had any ideas for me. I know we share an alliance, but I consider you quite ingenious."

"Thou doest?" Herman asks, his visor risen. He smiles goofily. "Well, I would need supplies… if only I had something akin to a rope or pulley, like what was used to hoist Dirk during the fashion parade by his bloomers… Those rapscallions would nary look to the skies." Reginald points to a nearby equipment shed. Herman’s eyes sparkle.

Grace, dressed in a pink costume with hearts, walks along a trail in a wooded area. She walks on her tiptoes. She admits, "Shoot. This is a piece of…" She steps on a twig that makes a loud cracking sounds. Her eyes get wide. She looks around, and sees no one around her. She heaves a sigh of relief. She turns around and walks directly into a costumed figure. She shrieks.

"Ah! My apologies for startling you, but it is just me, Isaiah," Isaiah explains.

Grace has a hand on her chest. She explains, "You about scared me to death."

"That was not my intent, I assure you," Isaiah insists.

Grace replies, "I know." She breathes a deep sigh. "You’re okay. What’s your game plan?"

Isaiah shrugs. He admits, "I am a fairly strong runner, I figured instead of hiding, my best chance to be victorious is to outrun my opponents."

Grace replies, "Solid strategy. I don’t run unless I’m trying to get to the hair stylist before they close, so… that option ain’t it." She laughs. Isaiah also laughs.

Isaiah looks at the surrounding area. "This is a heavily wooded area. This may be a good place to conceal yourself."

Grace agrees, "I think you’re right. There are plenty of hiding places." She observes the area. Her eyes widen. "Someone’s coming. I think I found my spot. Good luck." Grace dives into a bush between two trees.

Reginald approaches Isaiah. He greets, "Greetings, Isaiah. You look…" He coughs. "Most impressive in that costume."

Isaiah looks down. He responds, "It is quite snug…" He asks, "Do you have a… game plan?"

Reginald admits, "Maybe something will come to me."

Isaiah adds. "I know I have only been in this competition for a few days, but I must say that you have made me feel most welcome. I am glad I agreed to compete."

Reginald looks surprised. He assures, "No need for flattery."

"My words are sincere," Isaiah replies with a slightly confused look.

Reginald holds back a smile. He responds, "I feel the same." He looks behind him after hearing some rustling leaves. He puts a hand on Isaiah’s arm. Reginald states, "Someone is coming. This is a good place to hide. You stay here, and I’ll distract them." Reginald pushes Isaiah into the bushes. Reginald can be heard calling out, "Over here! I bet you can’t catch me, you scalawag!"

"Scalawag?" Isaiah repeats quietly. "Another term I am unfamiliar with." Grace glares at him. "It turns out that skinny man is much stronger than he looks."

"Mm-hmm," Grace replies. "A likely story. I’d prefer hiding alone, but I guess we have no choice, right now." Isaiah forces a smile. Some commotion can be heard just behind the bushes. Both contestants get quiet to avoid detection.

Grace states in confessional, "Isaiah said he was a good runner. If we hide together and get caught, he definitely can outrun me." She glares to the side. "I know what’s up."

Luke walks along. He looks back and forth at an area decorated with exotic plants and a yellowish hue. He removes his helmet and whistles. He comments, "Golly. I don’t think we’re in Canada, anymore." His costume is green with white clovers across his chest.

"Stop right there!" A voice calls out. Luke jumps as he looks at to oddly dressed figures in the distance.

Luke observes his surroundings. He states, "Looks like I found myself in a right dead end." He thinks for a moment. "What would Herman do in a situation like this?" He furrows his brow. "Probably some sort of goofy action pose." He nods to himself. "Stand back!" The approaching figures hesitate. "You’re not going to like what I do next, I reckon." The costumed captors turn to each other and nod. They begin approaching Luke with their arms outstretched. "Here goes nothing." Luke stands on one leg and raises an arm in the air. The pursuers stop in their tracks. Luke looks shocked. He states, "By golly it worked… Why does my hand feel funny?" Luke looks up, and his eyes get big as he realizes he has his arm inside a large bee hive. Luke frowns. "Uh-oh."

Blair looks around her. Her costume is orange with a shooting star design. She states to herself, "Huh. I guess the sky is pink on this side of the island. Whatevs!" Blair begins punching and kicking at the air in place.

"Look out!" Someone shouts as they run at full speed.

Blair looks in the direction of the voice. "Wait, was that green blur Luke?"

"Hey, man," another voice states. "Hold up. Isn’t that Blair? This should be easy."

Blair turns toward the masked figures. She gasps. "You must be the bad guys."

"I am Dark Lord Nedd!" A person in a red rubber costume introduces, with armor that looks skeletal, and an exposed looking brain. "This is my associate, Silverdar!"

Silverdar, dressed in silver armor and an elaborate headdress, states, "Hey."

"Cower before us!" Nedd commands.

"Sure, sure," Blair responds, "But first answer my one question."

"Fine, what is it?" Nedd asks.

"How’d you get all caked up?" Blair asks.

"What?" Nedd asks. He looks over at Silverdar.

"Don’t look at me," Silverdar directs. "I can never find good vegan cake."

Nedd places a hand over his face. "She’s talking about my butt, isn’t she. Look, I put on some weight since my last season. I think I look healthy, so I don’t apprecia…"

Blair calls out, "Consider yourself distracted!" She throws a small sphere to the ground and soon a large amount of orange smoke begins to surround her. "Peace!"

Nedd commands, "Grab her!"

Silverdar puts his arms out in front of himself. "She’s gone." Nedd kicks at the ground. Silverdar places a hand on Nedd’s back in an effort at consolation. As the smoke dissipates, Blair tiptoes behind them until she is out of sight.

Meanwhile, a woman in an elaborate cloak and holding a staff adorned with a purple orb slowly walks through a flat area. With a few tropical looking plants surrounding some rocks. Some high pitched squealing can be heard. One of her eyes gets wide. She looks around. "Did someone just ‘squee’?" Her eyes shift left and right before she slowly moves along. She mutters, "This is so not worth it."

"Na… I mean, Nedd!" Silverdar calls out. "I found another one."

Nedd instructs, "Let’s not hesitate this time." Silverdar nods. They both lunge at the contestant dressed in white. "I got her! Her hair is silky soft."

"I got her, too," Silverdar assures. "I got her by the waist. I have to say she is sturdily built. Very thick… She’s tugging on my hair, though."

"And my…" Nedd turns toward Silverdar and realize they are entangled with each other. They quickly step away from each other, awkwardly. After a moment, they compose themselves and lunge again at Quimberly, who shakes her head. The two captors again crash into each other as Quimberly does a back flip just in time. As she lands, she slides backward, and balances herself with a hand in the dirt. She then raises a hand in the air and motions for her pursuers to approach her, as dirt settles behind her. Nedd and Silverdar look at each other for a moment, and then run in the opposite direction.

As Nedd and Silverdar take a break from running, they hear someone nearby squeal. Silverdar looks about. "Did you hear that? That’s not a sound heard in nature."

"I think my eardrums burst from sheer awe from that last camper," Nedd admits.

Silverdar insists, "It sounded something like ‘squeee’."

Nedd assures, "It was probably the wind."

"It definitely was not," Silverdar insists. "I should know. I have painted with all of the wind’s colors. No, this was…"

Nedd crosses his arms. He states, "There you go getting hung up on something unimportant. Let’s just keep moving. There is clearly no one here." Silverdar looks annoyed. The pair walk off.

Esme is shown sitting on The Dock of Shame with her feet dipped in the water. Zane walks up and sits next to her. He says, "Hey, how are you holding up?"

Esme frowns. She admits, "I really messed things up, yesterday. I definitely miss having you as back up."

"I should be back to help, soon," Zane assures. "If the rain continues to hold off, Evan should be able to be transported soon."

Esme breathes a sigh of relief. She asks, "How is he?"

Zane assures, "He’ll be good. I have that feeling." He looks back up at the island. "Hey, I only had about a ten minute cigarette break, so I need to head back. I just wanted to check in with you."

"I appreciate that, I really do," Esme replies.

Zane nods, before giving a wave. "You got this." Esme smiles before he walks away. Esme puts her hands on her thighs, stands on the dock, and begins to walk up the dock. She pauses for a moment to look out at the water before returning to the island.

Dirk emerges from the water by The Dock of Shame and takes several deep breaths. "I thought… they would… never leave…" He catches his breath. "Good thing I’ve gained endurance from my frat buddies dunking my head in that fish tank on the regular…" Dirk looks up for a moment. "That were the baddies, weren’t they?" He looks down at his costume. "I thought that woman host said these were dry clean only. It looks fine to…" Dirk’s blue body suit quickly shrinks as he speaks. "Irk!"

Reginald looks behind himself as he walks forward. "New to these parts, huh?" A woman’s voice asks.

Reginald is startled as he turns around. "Oh. It’s you. Tamira is it?"

Tamira leans against a tree. She nods. "You seem more than a little anxious."

Reginald smiles confidently and assures, "You’re mistaken. I don’t care if I get caught. I’m not getting voted out, tonight."

Tamira places a finger on her helmet. "Maybe it’s not yourself you’re nervous for." Reginald looks surprised. "Idk what I’m actually implying, just talking like a rando and seeing what sticks."

Reginald rolls his eyes and says, "Right. So your strategy is just standing here at the starting point?"

"Pretty much," Tamira states. "I figure it’s the last place anyone one would search, and if they do they’ll probably think I was, like, already caught, or whatever."

Reginald looks blank. He responds, "Yeah… but… Huh."

"Now get out of here," Tamira directs. "I don’t want you to BMC."

"BMC?" Reginald repeats.

Tamira raises the visor of her helmet. She explains, "Blow… my… cover." She lowers her visor, again. Reginald awkwardly walks away.

Grace and Isaiah are shown together still hiding behind the bushes. "You are so interesting," Isaiah assures.

"Oh, stop," Grace replies.

"No, I really mean it," Isaiah assures. "I have to look more into this ‘hip hop’ music you like so much. My cousin dances to something referred to as ‘wubstep’. I am confused as to what instruments could possibly make those sounds." Grace laughs.

Grace adds, "What led you to move to Canada? It’s not exactly the most exciting place on Earth."

Isaiah shakes his head. He states, "Please, do not view me as rude, but I do not agree. There is so much green, and the winters are beautiful." Isaiah looks over at Grace, both contestants have their helmets on the ground next to them. "Not unlike you. I wish I had my camera with me, but it could never capture your beauty." Grace’s cheeks start turning red. She quickly places her helmet back over her head. "I am sorry. I did not mean to be so bold."

Grace insists, "It’s okay. I am beginning to really like you."

"I feel like I talk so much about myself," Isaiah admits. "Are you romantically involved with anyone? Uh… Again pardon my boldness. What is your life like outside of this competition?"

Grace responds, "What’s to tell? I thought I would pursue acting for a while, but the opportunities weren’t coming. I decided to go back to school. I also have a full time job as a waitress to help pay my way through college… It doesn’t leave much time for meeting new people."

"That is so admirable," Isaiah assures. "What are you…"

"Who’s back there!?" A cranky voice shouts. Grace and Isaiah jump. "My drones spotted flashes of black/pink in the area…" The woman dressed like a sorceress pulls back the bushes just above Isaiah. "I got you, my pretty."

Isaiah screams. He shouts, "It is a witch!"

The woman’s expression softens. She assures, "I’m not a real witch. My name is Sheena, I’m only dressed like a witch for thematic purposes."

"I remember who you are," Isaiah states. "I photographed you at a Total Drama viewing party, where you flipped a table when someone sat in your favorite chair, only to learn it was a chair they brought from home… And also it was your grandmother. I did not realize you were dressed as a witch, today."

Sheena narrows her eyes. "Well, consider yourself caught, wise guy. Is there anyone else back there? I thought I heard a woman’s voice."

Isaiah looks over at Grace, who frowns. He states, "No. It is only me back here."

"Well," Sheena responds. "I’ll ignore that meaningful glance, and take your word for it. My appearance fee is hardly worth crawling around in the bushes to fact check. Now, get your sorry bubble butt out here so I can capture you." Isaiah nods, and crawls out of the thicket. Grace looks on with a concerned expression.

Nedd and Silverdar walk back near an area they were already at. "Your costume is pretty epic," Nedd asserts.

"This?" Silverdar asks. "I feel like I’m appropriating a culture, I just can’t narrow it down to which one. I think yours is the cool one. You look scarier than that Sheena lady."

Nedd admits, "Yeah it looks cool, but I am sweating more than the time I got trapped naked in a cabinet in the girl’s locker room in junior high." Silverdar’s eyebrows raise. "Don’t ask. I have to take this thing off."

"Like that locker room, I don’t think this is the time nor the place," Silverdar’s eyes dart back and forth as he makes the comment.

"Quiet up," Nedd states. "I just meant my mask. Help me take it off. This latex really gets warm…" Silverdar begins helping to remove the mask from behind.

"Stop, you shalt ruin the illusion!" A voice states from nearby.

"Did you hear that, this time?" Silverdar asks.

"And the mask is made from silicone rubber!" The voice adds.

"There it is, again," Silverdar says, as he pulls the mask from his cohort, to reveal a handsome, vibrant looking Asian man. He shakes his wavy hair as he moves his head around. "Can I start calling you Nathan, again?"

Nathan responds, "Yeah, whatever."

The unseen voice groans.

"Hey," Nathan states, as he sets his mask on the ground. "I heard the voice that time. It sounded really whiny and prepubescent."

"Where do you think it’s coming from?" The stern looking Silverdar asks.

"The only place we haven’t looked is…" Nathan begins. The pair look up to the sky.

Tamira is joined by Isaiah, as an intern leads him to the starting point. Isaiah states, "Hello, cousin. It looks like we both lost the challenge."

"Shh!" Tamira states. "Don’t draw attention to me, unless it’s to how I’m making this awful outfit work, fr."

Isaiah blinks. He admits, "I still do not fully understand your manner of speaking."

Tamira’s eyes light up. She reveals, "Hey! Seeing you reminded me. The girls and I were talking about potentially teaming up with one of the men."

"Ah!" Isaiah replies. "Who did you decide on? Do you want me to tell them?"

"No, no," Tamira answers. "You can’t tell them anything. We decided on you."

"Me?" Isaiah asks. "But I am working with some of the other men."

"You are?" Tamira asks. Isaiah nods. Tamira places a hand under her chin. "We can protect whoever you’re working with, I suppose, at least atm."

"A… cash machine?" Isaiah asks blankly.

Tamira continues, "Don’t say anything to your alliance, yet."

Isaiah puts a hand at the back of his head. He states, "I suppose…" Isaiah looks at his arm as a droplet of water lands on it. He says, "Ah. Here comes the rain, again." Tamira frowns.

Esme walks up to the starting point. "Oh, shucks. We’ll need to end the challenge early."

"Why?" Isaiah asks. "A little rain is a good thing, am I not correct?"

Esme explains, "The rain will make that costume you are wearing shrink so it’ll burst right off of your body." She pauses. "On second thought…" She shakes her head. "No. One of our guests is contractually unable to work in the rain."

"What?" Tamira asks. "Is she going to melt?"

An announcement is made over the loudspeaker, and most of the contestants are gathered under a tent. Esme announces, "It appears Isaiah was the only contestant captured, so we will need to determine the winner another way."

"That hardly seems fair," Blair states. "We worked very hard."

"Ikr," Tamira states as she looks at her glove.

"And hold up," Nathan states. "We caught another one. We found him suspended by a hook and pulley system." Nathan and his stern accomplice present Herman. Quimberly looks concerned as she looks at an awkwardly smiling Herman.

"A big thank you to Sheena, Nathan, and Daniel for their valiant efforts during the challenge," Esme states. "I don’t care that everyone calls you the ultimate losers."

"Didn’t they only catch two out of nine of us?" Dirk asks. "That’s hardly… a third of us." Some of the others blink.

Grace looks at Dirk and his tiny costume. "What happened to you?"

Dirk admits, "Shrinkage."

Esme continues, "Well, how should we determine a winner?"

Daniel points a thumb at Quimberly, "That one definitely scared us the most."

Esme shrugs her shoulders. "Works for me, the winner of the challenge is…"

"Now wait just one minute," Grace asks. "The task was to evade capture. You distinctly stated that in the rules for the challenge. There was no mention of style points."

"If there were, I definitely would have gotten those," Tamira assures with a flick of her wrist.

Esme states, "That’s true, but I can’t very well give everyone invincibility."

Reginald shrugs. He asks, "Well, why not?"

Esme pauses. She thinks for a moment. She lets out a sigh. "So in the spirit of fairness, everyone receives invincibility except for Isaiah and Herman. When you vote someone out, tonight, it must be one of them."

Reginald looks taken aback. He says, "Wait… Maybe there is some other…"

"It is only fair," Isaiah responds.

Herman looks down. He admits, "Isaiah is right. We clearly did the worst in thy challenge."

Esme explains, "So it’s decided. Everyone will need to meet Chris for the campfire ceremony."

The men, excluding Isaiah and Herman, who return toward their cabin, huddle together. Luke comments, "Whooey. What a turn of events. Who do we vote for between the two fellers?"

"I say we keep Herman," Dirk states.

"Even though he’s skinny?" Luke asks.

Dirk assures, "That’s just it." Dirk points at his forehead. "I like the Isaiah guy, but he is more likely to be a challenge beast. Herman we can take deep in the game, and not have any trouble beating him in the challenges."

Luke admits, "I suppose it makes sense. What say you, Reg?"

"Huh?" Reginald asks. "I’m sorry. I was lost in thought."

The woman huddle together, "So we’re voting out Herman, right?" Tamira asks.

"Herman?" Quimberly asks.

"You know," Blair replies. "About yay verily high." She raises her hand about a meter from the ground. "Purple hair and goofy grin like this." Blair crosses her eyes and sticks out her tongue.

"I know who he is, obviously," Quimberly retorts, as she glares at Blair. "But why him?"

"Ooh," Tamira states. "Quimberly returned to our level to learn who someone is?" Tamira raises her hands in the air. "It’s nothing against him, but he is our default choice. Isaiah is joining our group. He’s my cousin-in-law… Not to mention that Grace has seemed to taken a liking to him." She slyly smiles at Grace.

"What?" Grace replies. "It’s nothing like that. I respect the man, that’s all."

"I guess anyway you slice that beefcake, he’s our only shot at making it any further in this game," Blair ponders.

"So I guess it’s settled," Tamira finalizes. Quimberly has her arms folded as she looks to the side.

At the campfire ceremony, Chris announces, "Welcome to your first campfire ceremony as individuals, again, to clarify, you did not merge until after our last campfire ceremony."

"We know," Reginald states as he holds his head down.

"I know that you know," Chris assures. "I just like rubbing it in. Thanks for that, Esme. Let’s get things started. The interns are working on distributing your marshmallows." Interns dressed in raincoats hand out soggy marshmallows. "I have just one marshmallow on this tray." Chris McLean gestures at said solitary marshmallow. "Isaiah or Herman… Herman or Isaiah." Chris sticks out his lower lip as he lowers his eyelids and gazes at the marshmallow. "The final marshmallow is for…"

"We’ll get to that in a moment." Chris states. "I’d like to turn everyone’s attention to the screen behind me." Chris pulls down a white projector screen. Chris pulls out a remote and presses a button. Blair is shown on the screen in the confessional. The contestants gasp.

Blair exits the confessional. She is followed in by Reginald. Reginald holds his head down, as he looks down at the voting parchment, clearly agitated. He admits, "I don’t know who to vote for… I can’t help but feel responsible for their losing the challenge, as I gave both of them their hiding spots, not to mention our alliance…" He pauses. "No. Our friendship." After a deep sigh. Reginald holds his head up, looks straight at the camera, and says, "I refuse to vote. Good day." Reginald exits the confessional. Those viewing the footage gasp, as they turn toward Reginald, who sits straight in his seat with his arms folded.

Chris assures, "What a grand gesture, truly noble." Reginald looks surprised. "But… This is my show, and one of the most basic rules is that you must vote."

Reginald insists, "Well, I refuse."

"So be it," Chris states as he raises his arms. "Consider yourself eliminated."

"Can he do that?" Tamira asks, as she looks at Grace. The others look at Grace.

"It is part of the rules that we must vote when attending a campfire ceremony," Grace admits.

Reginald stands. He states, "Well, I don’t need this stupid show, anyway. Chris only rigged the fan vote to have me appear again, because my daddy paid him off." Some of the others gasp, as Chris casually shrugs his shoulders.

"So does that mean you wanted to be here?" Blair asks. Reginald ignores the question.

Luke, Isaiah, and Herman stand, each looking disappointed. Reginald raises a hand upward. "Don’t make a scene. I respect each of you immensely, and therefore I ask that you respect me by not…" His friends don’t hesitate and surround him in a group hug. Reginald quietly says, "If nothing else, I’m glad my exiting is protecting both of you." Reginald straightens the collar to his raincoat, and bows to his competitors. "Thank you for allowing me a ‘redo’, if you will. Best wishes to each of you." Chris holds his hand out. Reginald hands his marshmallow back to Chris and makes his way to The Dock of Shame.

"What a shocker," Blair comments. "Well… See you next time, Chris." The others stand from their seats.

Chris holds up a hand. He states with a sly smile, "Now wait just a moment. Did I dismiss you?"

"Uh… no?" Blair responds.

Chris replies, "That’s right. While Reginald did not vote, we still did have a vote, and one more person must leave the game."

"You’re kidding?" Tamira interjects.

Chris shakes his head, as he eats the marshmallow Reginald handed him. He smiles, with gooey marshmallow in his teeth. "The final marshmallow goes to…" Herman and Isaiah look at each other with concern.

"Herman." The purple haired cosplayer catches his marshmallow. He immediately hugs Isaiah. "Isaiah that means you must join Reginald on The Boat of Losers. You have been eliminated."

Isaiah stands up and is hugged by his former competitors. "Thank you to each of you for making this time around a much more positive experience, even though I was in the game almost as long."

"We’re really going to miss you," Herman assures, a little teary eyed.

Isaiah adds, "The feeling is mutual." He hugs Grace last, after Tamira, and whispers to Grace, "I look forward to getting to know you in the future."

Grace nods, "I would like that. I’m not sure what happened… We should have had the votes to save you."

Isaiah smiles and insists, "It is as it is, as the say." Grace frowns, but nods. Isaiah holds up a hand, before taking his things and walking down The Dock of Shame to join Reginald.

"Alright," Chris begins. "Now you are all dismissed." The contestants stand and walk toward heir respective cabins.

Grace has a hand on Tamira’s back. Tamira admits, "I swore we had the votes to keep him." Grace gives a confused shrug.

Chris sits back on a seat. He pulls out a bucket of popcorn, and presses a button on his remote. It reveals Quimberly holding up a vote that reads ‘Isaiah’. She explains, “I am very sorry, Isaiah, but I can’t convince myself to vote out Herman." Quimberly puts her vote in the box before leaving the confessional. The next camper enters the confessional.

They quickly write down their vote, and hold it up. Chris pauses the screen and smiles wide as he laughs. Grace’s image is frozen on the screen as she holds up Isaiah’s name with a sad expression.

Chris states, "How savage!" Chris face the camera. "I can hardly believe it, but the show is called Total Drama for a reason. Be sure to join me next time for more surprises, and more potential betrayals on Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst!" The rain begins becoming more of a downpour.

### Chapter 12 - Talent Show Offs

Chris McLean, the sadistic host, greets the camera with his trademark unnaturally white smile, comfortably sitting in an armchair while wearing a robe, as the rain hits the window behind him. He greets, "Welcome to another episode of Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst! On our last episode, the contestants were hunted by a team of mediocre pursuers. All but two contestants were successful in evading their captors before the challenge ended, meaning that only Isaiah and Herman did not earn invincibility. Despite this, Reginald was eliminated for being unable to choose between his two allies, and Isaiah was eliminated for receiving the most votes. We have more in store, so stay tuned for more on this episode of Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst!"

Blair, Grace, and Tamira walk back from the campfire ceremony together, dressed in their rain gear. Blair states, "What a crazy campfire ceremony, huh? I wonder what happened."

"Uh-huh," Tamira responds while she glares at Blair. Grace looks the other way.

"So," Blair continues. "I wonder what will happen next…" She pauses for a moment. "Is it just me or has this season been a special brand of chaotic? I mean, this show is usually…" Blair trips on some mud and lands hard on her knee. "Ow, ow, ow!"

Grace and Tamira’s eyes get wide. "Blair!" Grace shouts. She covers her mouth with her hands. "Oh my goodness! She broke her leg!"

"No, no," Blair assures. "I think I just scraped my knee. I’m fine." She attempts to stand up, but stumbles. Tamira and Grace quickly help her to her feet.

Luke approaches from nearby and states, "Golly! That don’t look too good. We should get you to the medical tent, pronto like. I’ve seen horses with injuries better than that that needed to be…" Blair, Grace, and Tamira look at him with wide eyes. "Never mind all that. We should really get you to see the nurse feller."

Blair assures, "No, I really am fine."

Tamira sighs. She assures, "We want you to be safe. Who knows what part of this island might give someone tetanus, or whatever?"

Grace adds, "We’ll take you there, ourselves." Tamira nods. Grace blinks. "Where is it, exactly?"

Luke explains, "I done got my medication earlier, today, on account of my bee stings, but I’d be happy to take you there."

"Sounds like a plan," Grace states. "Let’s go."

Blair protests, "Oh, no. Don’t get bent out of shape over me. We don’t all have to go. You ladies can go back to the cabin where it’s dry."

Tamira frowns. She says, "We really don’t mind."

Grace looks to the side. She adds, "Well… Blair does have a point. No reason for all four of us to get soaked." She grimaces.

Tamira folds her arms. She replies, "I guess that makes sense. GL, Blair."

Blair nods. "You bet… Whatever GL means…" Blair attempts to walk, but hobbles.

Luke puts out his arm, and Blair puts her hand through his arm. Luke insists, "Let me help you, on account of your bum knee."

Blair awkwardly replies, "Uh. I guess that’s for the best." Her eyes show her surprise. She looks at Luke’s bicep and asks, "Do you work out?"

Luke puts his opposite hand to the back of his head. He admits, "Golly. No. I don’t have the time with throwing around hay bales, carrying unstable calves, and flipping tractor tires."

"Yeah, same," Blair responds with a sharp nod.

Luke responds with his mouth open, "Golly! Really? I want to hear every detail about your life."

"Really?" Blair asks. "No one’s ever asked me that, before." Blair looks thoughtful. "Where do I begin? When I was six I had my first juice box, and my world forever changed." Blair dramatically spreads her hands through the air.’

"Golly!" Luke responds. He looks fascinated. "Tell me more!"

Grace looks after the pair as they get further away. "That poor guy has no idea what he’s getting himself into." Tamira looks after them with her brow lowered.

Tamira asks, "I don’t get why she did it."

"Did what?" Grace asks. "Scrape her knee?"

Tamira clarifies, "I’m talking about the vote. I know it wasn’t me that flipped, and I know it wasn’t you. It must have been Blair and Quimberly." Tamira rolls her eyes. "I know Quimberly does her own thing, but I just can’t grasp why Blair would flip on us."

Grace responds, "I guess it’ll be one of the world’s great mysteries." Grace looks to the side.

Grace is shown in confessional. She explains, "I voted for Isaiah. I really liked him, but…" She looks down. "That was the problem." She looks back up at the camera. "Maybe something can happen outside of the show, but I am not about to jeopardize my game for a guy. The same thing goes for the vote. Shoot. My lips are sealed. I am not about to admit that I voted against my alliance." She winces. "Sorry, Blair, girl."

Luke helps Blair along the way to the medical tent. Blair rambles on, "And so then you know what happened next?"

"Gosh, no!" Luke responds. "Did the bank manager approve your loan?"

Blair blinks. "Uh, no," she responds. Luke looks disappointed. "But that was because a whale burst through the walls of the loan office!"

"Yikes!" Luke responds. "What was it doing there?"

Blair explains, "It was on transport to the local Water World. The driver has no idea what happened, but some teenagers were sadly hurt in the accident."

"Golly," Luke replies. "Poor kids."

Blair shifts her eyes to the right. "Legend has it, the teenagers narrowly avoided a tragic boating accident after one of them had a dream about it. They thought karma was following them around, or something."

"Wowzer!" Luke responds. "That’s the kind of thing you only see in the moving pictures."

"I know, but…" Blair begins.

"Were you hurt?" Luke asks.

"No, but I…" Blair responds.

Luke continues, excitedly, "What happened next? Did the whale survive?"

Blair continues, "It’s kind of a blur. It took a whole emergency response team, and a nearby high school hockey team, but yes."

Luke responds, "Golly! That’s such an amazing story. I would have loved to have been there."

Blair blinks. She responds, "Nobody has ever believed that story before… I mean, they usually fell asleep before the end of it, but still."

Luke shakes his head and assures, "I think you might be the most interesting person I’ve ever met."

Blair’s eyes get wide. She replies, "Really?"

In confessional, Blair asks, "Luke seems really nice… But he sure does talk a lot…" She pauses for a moment. "I wonder what his angle is?"

Luke states, "Hey, we’re here, already. That little jaunt seemed so quick, on account of how entertaining your story was."

"Thanks," Blair responds. The two enter the tent.

Luke looks at Blair for a moment. He looks flustered before saying, "Golly. I better get Nurse Bigby. He’ll fix you up right good." Luke helps Blair to an empty wheelchair. "Stay right here."

Blair begins, "Thanks, I…" Luke rushes off. Blair looks after him with a raised eyebrow.

In Evan’s room, Nurse Bigby’s cheeks are red as he hands a hospital gown to Dirk. "I wasn’t expecting you to be undressed when I walked in."

Dirk looks down at his grey boxer briefs. He assures, "My clothes were pretty soggy."

"I thought you said you had a rain coat you were going to wear if it continued raining," Bigby adds with his arms crossed.

Dirk looks to the side. He responds, "Oh yeah. I guess I did say that, but I was wearing one. I guess I was in a rush to get here, and it got caught on a branch. I fell straight into a mud puddle." Dirk rubs the back of his head.

Nurse Bigby laughs. He says, "That sounds like you. Hey, uh… I have a little free time, tonight, so maybe I can hang out here for a little bit. If that’s okay with you, that is…"

"I’m in," Dirk responds with a rapid nod. "Maybe we could read some of the vintage magazines you left me to read, or…" Dirk gestures to a box on the floor. Nurse Bigby puts his arms around Dirk and leans in to kiss him.

Luke walks through the tent flap. He looks on with wide eyes. Dirk and Bigby quickly stand apart and put there hands behind there backs. Luke says, "Golly! Don’t stop on my account."

"You’re okay with this?" Nurse Bigby asks.

"Of course he is," Dirk replies with a raised eyebrow.

Luke nods. "I totally get it. But shouldn’t you continue mouth to mouth on Dirk? He could still be choking."

"No," Bigby responds. "Wait, how do you think mouth to mouth works?"

Luke states, "I’m sorry to interrupt, but I got an injured Blair with me who needs some attention."

Dirk assures, "Yeah. She rolled in here earlier to sign Evan’s cast."

Bigby nods before looking back at Dirk. "Sorry, Dirk. I promise that tomorrow we will get together for dinner at my place. I have everything arranged."

Dirk forces a smile and assures, "It’s alright. It sounds like an emergency, even if it is Blair." Bigby nods before stepping out of Evan’s room.

"So that wasn’t mouth to mouth?" Luke asks Dirk.

Dirk explains, "Nah, Luke. Bigby and I were making out. I figured you’d be cool with that, given…"

Luke admits, "I done never met a real life homosexual, that I know of. Sorry for being a little ignorant."

Dirk’s face turns red. "I think I made some assumptions."

Luke puts a hand on the back of his head. "On account of my having HIV? I guess you’re not the first to think that, but it was on account of…"

"A surgery, right?" Dirk responds. Dirk puts on his hospital gown. "I was beginning to get jealous of you and Bigby."

"Me and Bigby?" Luke asks. He thinks to himself. "He is a right handsome feller and all, but…"

Dirk puts his hands up. He assures, "It’s nothing, really. I just thought you were more his type than me, back when I thought you were… you know."

Luke responds, "I don’t quite understand. I reckon you’re a catch. I mean, that’s a right beaut of a mullet."

Dirk laughs. "Nah, I know I’m a stud, I’m just not a great guy like you are."

"Oh, go on," Luke responds. "I’ve got my faults. Besides, I see how you’re trying to be nicer, like with Herman, earlier."

Dirk looks down as he sits in a chair next to Luke. "But it comes so natural for you."

"It took work, even for me," Luke assures. "Remember how I knocked out that doctor feller? It just takes time."

"I don’t even know where to start," Dirk admits.

Luke suggests with a shoulder shrug, "Maybe try treating the women better?"

Dirk quickly shakes his head. His cheeks flapping a little. "No way. You’re asking the impossible."

Luke insists, "Take Blair, for example."

"No, thanks. You can have her," Dirk responds with a frown.

"I mean, she might seem to flap her gums quite a bit, but if you really listen to her, I think you’ll find her right interesting," Luke explains.

Dirk blinks. "What if I say no?"

Luke laughs. He replies, "I wouldn’t take that for an answer."

Dirk laughs. He assures, "Okay. I’ll do my best, but don’t expect any miracles." Dirk pauses for a moment. He responds, "Maybe you should go check up on her."

Luke stands up, and adjusts his rain hat. He replies, "I reckon you’re right. Have a nice night."

"You, too," Dirk responds.

Luke pauses just before exiting. He hesitates before speaking. He says, "I reckon it’s none of my business… But remember when we done had that challenge with that big haired lady?"

"Yeah," Dirk responds as he looks down.

Luke states, "Whatever your secret is… I hope everything is alright… At home and all."

"Thanks," Dirk replies, not looking directly at Luke. "It’s fine, really."

Luke nods. "I reckon it’s time for me to skedaddle." Luke turns toward the exit. He stops, again. He looks at Dirk over his shoulder. "If you ever need a place to stay, we got a chicken coop we can clear out for visitors. You can stay as long as you like."

Dirk forces a smile, and insists, “Nothing’s wrong. That picture was from when I took a bad fall a while back. It wasn’t anything."

Luke smiles. He assures, "Hey, I believe you. Have a nice night, pally. Make sure Evan doesn’t go any place." Luke lets out a hearty laugh.

"Will do," Dirk responds with a nod. Luke leaves through the tent flap. Dirk lets out a deep sigh. He says to himself, "I suppose I have to tell Bigby the truth… I’m sure he would understand… Bigby is a…"

"Big loser," a weak voice states.

"No," Dirk responds. "I was going to say ‘king’." Dirk’s eyes get wide. He falls back in his chair. Dirk then quickly calls out, "Nurse Bigby! It’s Evan! He…"

"Shh!" Evan responds. He coughs a few times. "I don’t want to see that big lug, right now."

Dirk nods before approaching Evan’s bed. "I can’t believe you’re awake! And I kind of deserved that."

"Deserved what?" Evan asks, one of his eyes is black and he can only open it part way.

"You calling me a big loser," Dirk answers. "I got myself in a giant pickle, not to mention the way I treated y…"

Evan gruffly admits, "I wasn’t talking about you. I was talking about that big jerk, Bigby."

Dirk looks surprised. He replies, "How bad did you hurt your head? Bigby is a perfect guy if I ever saw one."

"Yeah, he’s alright," Evan responds as he looks away. "But his bedside manner leaves a lot to be desired."

"I wouldn’t know," Dirk dreamily states.

Evan blinks. He admits, "I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that. I don’t get the guy. Sure, he’s got prefect hair, a killer bod, and nice teeth… but he’s pretty rough with me, and… I don’t like the way he brushes you off."

"You saw that?" Dirk asks. Evan nods. Dirk looks to the side. "He really is busy here… And besides… What do you care?" Dirk asks. "I feel bad what happened to you and all, but you didn’t exactly treat me with respect, Bones."

Evan scoffs. "Please. Don’t act all high and mighty. You’re the one who pushed me down right when I arrived. I bet you’re glad I got hurt."

Dirk looks to the side. "Sure, I hate your stinking guts, but I didn’t want to see you get hurt. Not seriously, anyway…"

"Yeah, right," Evan replies as his eyes dart to the side.

"It’s true," Dirk responds. "I feel so sick about what happened to you. Because of that, I’ve been trying to be a better guy. Plus, I’ve been staying here almost every night so Zane can get some rest."

"You have?" Evan asks. Dirk nods. "But what about you?"

Dirk admits as he rubs the back of his head, "I haven’t been sleeping a whole lot, what with the competition during the day, and then this at night, but I forced myself to stay awake."

"Why?" Evan asks, with a slight frown.

Dirk explains, "I’m supposed to. Besides, what if you woke up, Bones? I would be kicking myself if you woke up for the first time on my watch and I wasn’t ready to help you."

Evan scoffs, again. He admits, "This isn’t the first time I’ve woken up. Every time I do, that tall, skinny cohost is fast asleep in that chair."

"He is?" Dirk asks with wide eyes. "I mean, you’ve been awake?"

Evan nods. He says, "Ow. Yeah. It’s ironic that you’re the only one that seems to care about me."

Dirk blinks. He assures, "That’s not true. See all those signatures on your casts? See? There’s one from  Luke… And that Esme person?"

Evan looks up and down at one of his casts. He comments, "I guess… Too bad you suck at forging signatures." Dirk’s eyes widen. "Don’t be shocked. All I have to do all day is look at these stupid casts. Luke’s is real and all, but… Why did you start signing your name more than once?"

Dirk admits, "Those were the only names I could remember, and I didn’t want you to feel bad with having blank spaces on your casts… I know what that feels like…" Evan looks over at Dirk. "Anyway… You should get some rest. We’ve been talking for a while."

"Don’t feel obligated to stay here," Evan assures. "Or at the least you can finally get some sleep."

"I don’t mind," Dirk insists. "You didn’t deserve what happened to you, and it’s the least I can do." Dirk picks up a magazine that looks decades old and opens it up.

Evan quietly states, "Isn’t that the way… the guy I hated the most is the one that stays…"

Dirk looks up from his magazine. He asks, "What was that? I’m no devastatingly handsome medical professional, but your voice is still pretty weak, I guess…" Dirk looks tired as he looks down at his magazine. He looks intently at the pages.

"What’s so fascinating?" Evan asks.

Dirk gazes at a fragrance ad and responds, "Do you think I’d look good in a mustache?" Evan looks vacant as he stares at Dirk.

Luke and Blair walk together in the rain on their way back to the contestant cabins. Luke admits, "Are you sure your knee is alright? I don’t mind helping you walk, again."

"That beefy nurse said it’ll be fine," Blair assures. "I should be better after a good night’s rest, so I’m not worried. Handsome people have no reason to fib… I wonder if he’s single…"

Luke looks uneasy. He replies, "I reckon he isn’t interested in ladies."

Blair looks at Luke with wide eyes. She responds, "Uh. Newsflash. I know. I think everyone does, it’s not like he doesn’t purposely project it."

Luke looks embarrassed. He responds, "I guess I’m just slow on the uptake. I only just found out when I saw him kissing…" Blair’s eyes get even wider. "Uh. I think the rain is just about to clear up."

Blair looks up at the sky as the rain continues to downpour. She states, "Right… So, do you have a girlfriend?"

"I reckon I don’t like girls," Luke responds.

Blair replies, "Figures. It’s always the handsome ones."

Luke blinks. He insists, "No, I mean… I don’t like anybody."

Blair puts a hand to her chin. She states, "Is that one asexual? I forget. I suppose you could be. Or maybe you’re pansexual… Wait. I think I mean demisexual. You could be and just don’t know it. I read about it, once."

"Demi, whose it?" Luke asks with a raised eyebrow.

Blair explains, "It’s like when someone is only romantically attracted to someone when they really get to know them, and then those feelings develop." Blair places a finger under her chin. "I wonder if that’s real." Luke looks at Blair for a moment. His face begins to look flushed. Blair asks, "What are you looking at? Do I have something on my face? That nurse guy, you know, the one with the biceps, gave me a Fattie Cake from the vending machine. I probably still have some crumbs on my face." She wipes at her face.

Luke shakes his head. He assures, "I reckon I just… am impressed with how much you know, is all."

Blair looks at Luke with a confused look. She shrugs it off and looks forward. "Hey, looks like we’re here." She turns to Luke. "How can I repay you for looking after me?"

Luke puts a hand to the back of his head. He assures, "Golly. It was no thing. I hope you feel better."

"Thanks," Blair responds. "See you around." Blair begins to stumble as she approaches her cabin.

Luke helps Blair up the steps to the women’s cabin. He has her hand in his. He looks down at their hands. He states, "Actually, Blair… I was thinking… Maybe after the show, you and I could…"

"There you are," a voice states. The pair quickly look up to see Tamira and Grace at the door. Tamira continues, "We were worried sick. Are you alright?"

Blair assures, "Just peachy, thanks to Luke here."

Luke blushes. He insists, "Ah, shucks… It wasn’t no big deal…"

Tamira raises an eyebrow as she looks at the two. Blair leans in toward Luke and loudly whispers, "You can let go of my hand, now."

"Oh, right," Luke states. "Well… I should go on and get. Have a lovely night, ladies… If I had a hat, I would tip it in your general direction." Luke awkwardly walks off.

Blair states, "I should get ready for bed. See you guys inside."

Grace nods. She turns toward the door, before Tamira slams it shut. Grace looks surprised. She asks, "What is wrong with you? It is pouring out here. Have you flipped your dang lid? Is your necklace too tight and cutting off circulation to your brain? Are you…"

Tamira puts a finger to Grace’s lips. Grace looks down with a surprised expression. "O… M… G…" She pulls her finger away.

"What has gotten into you, girl?" Grace asks.

"It all makes sense," Tamira states.

"You’ll need to explain it to me before I have to ask again, otherwise…" Grace begins.

Tamira paces back and forth. "Blair and Luke are an item!"

"Girl, you done lost your mind," Grace states. "Go stick your head out in the rain, maybe your brain needs a good washing."

"Think about it," Tamira asks. "Why else would Blair vote with the men?"

Grace looks to the side. "I’m sure she had a very logical reason."

Tamira puts her hands on Grace’s shoulders. Grace looks at them with raised eyebrows. Tamira goes on, "You saw them holding hands, and he was totes about to ask her out." She pauses. "The thing is, imho, that guy is way out of poor Blair’s league. He must be toying with her just for her vote. Poor, poor, naive Blair. We have to tell her."

Grace looks to aside. "Shoot. I think you’re reading way too much into this."

Tamira folds her arms. She asks, "Can you think of a better explanation?"

Grace looks blankly at Tamira. She replies, "Dang, Blair. How could you?"

"Ikr," Tamira adds. "We have to go confront her." Tamira opens the cabin door to find Blair already fast asleep. Tamira looks at Grace and says, "There’s always tomorrow." Grace nods.

In confessional, Luke states, "I done come back here because I couldn’t sleep. Maybe it was on account of Herman’s snoring, but maybe it was because I can’t stop thinking about Blair. I don’t remember all of what Blair said, tonight, I reckon it was a lot… But something she said really struck a chord…" He looks down. "I don’t claim to know a whole lot, but… I think, maybe, I like her… I only felt this way about one other person before, and I just swept those feeling under the rug. I used my sickness as an excuse to push her away… I reckon I was too scared to admit that I was too scared to be in a relationship." Luke looks up at the camera. "I reckon I am not going to run away this time." He blinks. He asks, "Y’all are not going to air this, are ya?"

The next day, Blair shakes Tamira by the shoulder. "Whu…” Tamira begins. "What is it? Is it an earthquake? Or a… land shark?"

Blair laughs. She explains, "Neither, silly. They just announced that we need to gather for the next challenge."

Grace takes off a sleeping mask and asks, "This early? Tamira still needs her beauty sleep." Tamira glares in Grace’s direction. Grace smirks and insists, "I’m just playin’."

Blair puts her hands on her hips and looks reflective. "I reckon you slept through lunch, even."

"Reckon?" Tamira repeats as she and Grace share a glance. She adds, "I guess staying up all night waiting for Blair to get back really wore us out." Grace nods.

Blair nods. She adds, "I guess Luke was really been rubbing off on me." Tamira and Grace share another glance. "Alright. Let’s get up and at ‘em. We don’t want to keep Quimberly waiting." Tamira and Grace nod.

The contestants are gathered in front of Esme in front of a large stage inside an enclosed area. Esme says with a sigh, "I wonder if this rain will ever let up." She smiles. "It really is fortunate that we had this building prepared in time. It’s come in quite handy…" She explains, "Today’s challenge was originally slated to be a bug catching tournament, but we had to cancel it."

"Gosh darn it," Luke states. "Just on account of a little rain?"

Tamira looks down at her fingernails. She admits, "I say it’s for the best. I am so not a bug type."

"What, pray tell, art we doing instead?" Herman asks.

Esme dramatically extends her arms. She announces, "A talent show!"

"Cool!" Blair exclaims, as the others groan. She looks at them with a frown. "I mean… Lame-o!"

Esme sighs. She admits, "I was hoping you all would be excited for this."

"We are," Luke assures with a forced smile. "I just am not a very talented person, unless castrating bulls counts as a talent."

"It doesn’t," Grace adds. "Besides. We all know Quimberly is winning this." Everyone nods.

Esme admits, "I know, but please just bare with me. I am doing the best I can." The others groan some more.

Dirk frowns. He forces out, "Uh… Esme is…" His eye twitches. "Right." The others gasp. He looks over at Luke who winks at him. Dirk gestures toward her. "I mean… Look at how exhausted she looks. Like she hasn’t seen a mirror in years." Esme lowers her eyelids as she glares at him. Dirk looks back at Luke who has his face covered by one of his hands. Dirk smiles with a thumbs up.

Esme adds, "Anyways…" Esme gestures behind the stage. "We have plenty of supplies, and costumes for whatever your talents might be." She claps her hands together. "You all have an hour to prepare." She looks over at three people sitting behind a table. Esme holds a hand out toward them. "These are our distinguished judges." One of the judges waves.

"Aren’t those just the three interns Chris hasn’t fired, yet?" Blair asks.

Esme frowns. She explains, "Right. We weren’t able to fly anyone better out because of the rain." The waving judge slowly lowers his hand. "Alright. I’m excited to see the guys’ talents…" Some of the contestants look blankly at her. "I mean… your guys’ talents. All you… guys." Esme tugs on her collar.

Backstage, Luke digs through the trunks of items. He frowns. He says, "I was hoping for a mechanical bull, or maybe a goat I could milk." He holds up a French horn. "Is this one of those old timey hearing aids?"

Quimberly has her arms folded. She admits, "I just wish there was something back here that I wasn’t already an expert in."

"Golly," Luke states. He looks over at an exhausted looking Dirk. "Hey, Dirk?" Dirk’s head drops down. "Dirk?"

Dirk holds his head up quickly. "Huh? What? Who am I?"

Luke puts a hand on Dirk’s shoulder. He asks, "Are you sure you’re up for this? I reckon no one would mind if you got some rest."

Esme sticks her head behind the curtain. She states, "Dirk. You’re on in five."

Dirk looks around.  He asks, "Was that the voice of an angel?" Esme smiles before returning her head back to the front stage. "A fallen angel, that is."

Esme sticks her head backstage, again. She adds, "And Dirk…" She narrows her eyes. "Break… a… leg…" She tilts her head to the side, before returning to the stage. Dirk still looks surprised.

Luke continues to look through the supplies for the talent show. He holds up a hoop with fabric hanging from it. He asks, "What is this?"

Quimberly explains, "It’s a curtain. Quick change artists use it to obscure their costume changes."

"Wowee," Luke states. "I’m… not sure what any of that means." He looks over at Dirk. "Hey, pally. What  is your talent going to be?"

Dirk has a wide grin as he answers, "Only the manliest of talents." He holds up a table saw. "Woodworking!" Some of the others look surprised.

On stage, Dirk explains as he holds up a piece of wood. "Get a good gander at this hunk of wood. It’ll be a stool, or sort of a mini table in a matter of moments! Cool, huh?"

The judges say in unison, "Oooh!"

"Someone set the timer for one minute!" Esme fumbles with a digital alarm before setting it. Dirk looks at her with a forced smile. "That was almost competent." Esme glares at him. Dirk works the piece of wood through the table saw. He holds up a piece of wood. "This’ll be a leg or something." He pushes the wood through the saw again. His eyelids look heavy. "You know… the sound of sawing logs is so soothing."

A crash is heard from behind the judges. Esme and the judges look back to see a housekeeper picking up their mop. They say, "My apologies."

Esme assures, "It’s okay." She smiles. She and the judges turn their attention back toward Dirk and they gasp as they see him fast asleep, with his head resting in front of the approaching table saw. "Dirk!" Esme calls out. Dirk fails to respond. The saw stops a few millimeters from Dirk’s head. Esme lets out a sigh of relief. "That was a close shave… Or I suppose it almost was."

One of the interns states, "It was. That mullet is a hero of mine." The other judges nod.

Esme looks at them with a raised eyebrow. She responds, "Okay." She looks thoughtful for a moment. "Wait. Why did the saw turn off so suddenly?"

Quimberly is shown holding up the power cord. "You’re welcome. I saved you from another lawsuit." She walks off the stage.

Esme gives another sigh of relief. She states, "Next up is Grace with an excerpt from her favorite stage play. Take it away, Grace." Esme and the judges applauds.

Grace emerges in a renaissance style gown. Herman looks on from the side with a proud smile. Grace dramatically holds up her hands. She approaches a coffin on the stage and projects, "Alas, poor Eric. Whatever may be may be, and a bottle of rosé by any other name twas nobler in the mind." A single proud tear rolls down Herman’s cheek. Grace continues, "Oh, haphazard dagger…" She holds up a floppy rubber prop knife. She places a hand on the coffin. "If only I could remove my lover’s lips in order to kiss them, even in death, but my heart will not allow me to do so." She tosses the dagger off stage. Herman can be heard yelping from behind the curtain. "Mayhap one last kiss will sustain me for an eternity, I know not what else to do…" She begins to open the coffin. "My eyes rejoice to behold you one last time, and my lips quiver at…" Grace’s eyes shoot wide open as she sees that Dirk is in the coffin completely passed out. Grace walks off stage. "Nah. I’m out."

Esme and the judges look on in disbelief. Esme states, "Wow… What a twist. I don’t see that earning a winning score from our judges, but can you blame the woman. Okay, next up we have… Herman with the harmonious stylings of…" Esme looks down at her clipboard, "The ocarina?" Esme applauds with her clipboard as she steps off the stage.

Herman arrives on stage in a blue tunic. He announces with an exaggerated bow, "Salutations, gentlemen and gentle ladies. For my first piece, I shalt be playing the 1985 16-bit classic ‘Requiem of Rain’." Herman clears his throat and begins blowing into the instrument. It makes no sound, as his cheeks puff out. He looks clearly winded. Herman explains, "… My next piece is entitled ‘Bolero of Boiling Water’." Herman braces himself with a deep breath. He again attempts to play the instrument, but to no avail. Herman holds the ocarina to his side as he puts his hands on his knees. "This… is… harder than it looks… digitally…" Herman’s eyes light up, and he smirks. "My final piece is called… ‘Serenade of Silence’." Herman blows into the small flute, again. This time it makes a high pitched sound. Herman removes the ocarina from his lips and yells, "Now thou playest! Cometh on!"

Esme walks on stage and states, "Herman, everybody. Let’s give him a big obligatory round of applause." Herman receives roughly three claps before exiting the stage. Esme refers to her clipboard. "Our next performance is Tamira with an unbelievable transformation."

Tamira waves as she approaches a chair on stage. She waves to the audience. She greets, "Hello, everyone! Thanks for joining me, rn." Tamira holds a hand above her sunglasses. She asks, "Can I get a volunteer, please?" One of the interns raises a hand. Tamira stifles a laugh. She states, "Sorry, sweetie. I am many things, but a miracle worker is not one of them." The intern slowly lowers their hand. Tamira glares to the side of the stage. "Maybe there’s someone backstage willing to join me?"

Quimberly steps onto the stage. She states, "Let’s get this over with."

Tamira looks surprised. She winces as she says, "Sorry, Quimberly. How about someone that actually needs a glow up?" Tamira holds a hand to her lips. "How about I just say a totes random name? I don’t know… Maybe… Blair? Come on out here, love."

Blair gets pushed on stage with a hoagie hanging out of her mouth. She removes it and explains, "I got an extra sangwich from the cafeteria since a few people weren’t awake, yet."

Tamira frowns. She responds, "Today was hoagie day?" She scoffs. "Whatevs. Hey, Blair, girl. Please take a seat."

"Sure," Blair replies, "Do you want me to put it back when I’m done with it?" Blair laughs. Tamira frowns. Blair adds, "Because you said ‘take a seat’… like if I like… took it?" Blair sits down.

Tamira holds out some supplies for applying makeup. She announces, "We’re about to take Blair from mediocre, to ‘meaty, okurr’!"

"Mediocre?" Blair repeats with a frown.

"Hey, Blair," Tamira adds. "Are you ready to look halfway presentable?"

"Hey!" Blair responds.

"Hey, girl, hey," Tamira replies. "Let’s begin." A cloud surrounds Blair as Tamira begins the makeover.

Blair sneezes, cough, and protests, "I don’t know if that belongs there!"

Tamira smiles, and says, "Another job well done, if I may say so, myself." She turns Blair around in her chair to face the judges. They gasp and applaud. Tamira leans in and whispers to Blair, "I hope Luke likes it."

"Luke?" Blair replies. "Why would he care?"

Tamira looks coy. She says, "Lol. Jk. What matters is that you love it." Tamira holds up a handheld mirror.

Blair frowns, as she pushes the hand mirror down. She states, "Not really. I look like a woman from a 1980’s music video."

"That’s good, right?" Tamira asks as she poses for the judges.

"It just isn’t quite… me," Blair comments.

"That’s good, too, right?" Tamira asks, again.

The judges look at each other. One of them states, "We will need to take how the makeoveree feels into consideration. Thank you."

"Thanks a lot, Blair," Tamira says with an eye roll.

"Any time," Blair assures, innocently. The two woman walk backstage together.

Grace assures, "You look awesome, Blair." She nudges Luke in his long torso. "What do you think, Luke?"

Luke admits, "My meemaw always told me not to say nothing at all if I have nothing nice to say."

"Luke!" Grace shouts, as she elbows him in the torso, again, and she smirks at Tamira. Luke rubs his side.

Blair assures, "It’s okay, really. I don’t like it, either."

Luke nods. He admits, "You look good, and all, but about as comfortable as a hog in skinny jeans. I reckon I like it when you look like yourself."

Blair rolls her eyes. She replies, "Cool your jets, Lukie Loo. I might slip on your drool." Luke looks at the floor with wide eyes. "Sorry… I don’t usually behave like Tamira and Grace, I’m just irritable. I have to get a move on. My set is up next." Blair walks past him. Tamira and Grace look stunned as they look at each other.

Grace leans in toward Tamira and whispers, "What did we just witness?"

"I am equally confused," Tamira admits with a shoulder shrug. "Maybe she’s trying to throw us off the scent?"

The judges and Esme are shown nodding off. Blair announces, "I’m done." Esme jolts awake.

Esme says, "Uh. Thank you, Blair, for that…" The assistant host looks at her watch. "Eighteen minute spoken word performance."

Blair asks, "Did you like the part where I compared the rotation of the planet to my love for bacon?"

"Sure?" Esme responds.

Blair narrows her eyes. She says, "I made that up to test you."

"Uh," Esme begins. "I guess you could call that a freestyle."

"I guess you’re right," Blair comments with a thoughtful pose with her hand under her chin. She exits the stage.

Esme announces, "Next we have Luke with an astonishing…" Esme looks at her clipboard with a furrowed brow. "Quick change act." Esme walks off the stage to stand near the judges.

Luke steps on stage with a large hoop with a curtain attached to it. He announces, "Prepare to be amazed, and the like, as I change to an unexpected costume."

"Is he announcing something being unexpected?" One of the judges asks. "Am I the only one that sees the irony in that?"

One of the other judges puts a hand over their forehead. She states, "It’s embarrassing how he thinks we can’t see the costume underneath his other clothes." Luke’s second, red costume is clearly visible beneath his outfit.

Luke holds up the ring with the curtain attached to cover himself. After about a minute of struggling, Luke states, "I got a… trick up my… sleeve." He continues to hold up the curtain. "Just give me a minute, now." The judges shake their heads, as Esme winces. "I think I got my costume caught on sumthin’, now hold on." The sound of a zipper being unzipped is caught by the microphone.

"I am experiencing secondhand embarrassment, right now," One of the interns whispers to another.

"I almost got it," Luke assures. "Heck, this is hard to do while holding this hoop thing, I’ll tell you what."

"Should we just end this, now?" An intern asks Esme.

Esme assures, "No, no. I have faith that Luke is about to knock our socks off."

"I think he might beat Blair’s time at this ra…" The intern quips.

"Ta-da!" Luke shouts, as he drops the ring. The sleeve from his revealed costume gets stuck on the hoop and quickly tears away from his body. He stands on stage naked, as he unwittingly waits for a reaction. The judges look on with their jaws dropped, while Esme falls backward. One of the interns fans her with her clipboard, all while still looking at Luke. Luke smiles and says, "I reckon their being speechless is a positive. I really thought I was going to walk away from this feeling like a downright wiener." Luke struts off stage, dragging the costume, still attached to his wrist.

The others, excluding Quimberly and Blair, look on at Luke with wide eyes. Dirk assures, "Yeah. Now I’m awake."

Luke comments, "Golly. I was not expecting that reaction from the judges. Truth be told, I was so nervous that I had to imagine them all naked just to get through that performance."

"They didn’t have to imagine when it came to you," Grace adds as she looks up and down at him. Tamira raises her sunglasses above her eyes.

Luke blinks. He asks, "What was that, now?"

Blair has a hand on her forehead. "Luke. You’re not wearing any clothes."

"Come again?" Luke asks, with a furrowed brow.

"You’re buck naked," Blair adds.

Luke looks down. His eyes shoot wide open as he attempts to cover his manhood. "Gee willikers! Pardon my language, but I can’t believe it! Do you think everyone saw my willikers?" Luke rushes off stage. "I gotta go."

Blair sighs. She shakes her head as she comments, "Get a hold of yourself man." She looks to the side. "Some people are just beyond help." Tamira and Grace look at each other.

Grace whispers to Tamira, "She really is laying it on thick." Tamira nods.

Esme is helped to her feet, and given a glass of water. She takes a sip, and then spits it out. "Is this rain water?" She shakes her head. "Well, that was certainly… a surprise." Esme clears her throat. She announces, "Now for our final performance, which is sure to be a certified show stopper. It’s Quimberly with her death defying stunt!" Esme walks away as the judges applaud.

Quimberly steps in front of a large purple wheel, carrying a bag behind her back. She explains, "I’m going to throw axes at this target. I’ll be blindfolded. It doesn’t make things much more difficult, but the normies seem to think it does." Quimberly ties a blindfold to cover her eyes.

The judges say, "Ooooh!" in unison.

"My case and point," Quimberly responds. "If I can get a volunteer to be strapped onto the target." Quimberly yawns. "We’ll spin the wheel, again for the easily impressed normies."

Esme announces, "Okay. Your volunteer is strapped in and ready to go." Esme spins the wheel and walks away.

Quimberly lifts an axe and announces, "Now for dramatic effect, if my volunteer can give out a scream. The more bloodcurdling the better."

"Huzzah!" The volunteer shouts. "How’s that, lady Quimberly?"

"Is that?" Quimberly asks.

Herman smiles. "It is I, Herman! I have full faith in thy remarkable capabilities. I volunteered as tribute. I am but thou humble servant." He assures, "I am nary nervous, at all, I’m in thou’s capable hands."

Quimberly frowns. She says to herself, "What is this feeling? Why are my palms slimy?"

"Thou hast this!" Herman assures.

Quimberly readies to throw an axe. She frowns for a moment. As she readies to release the axe, she suddenly changes the trajectory and tosses the axe straight to the floor. The judges gasp. One of them asks, "Did she… miss?"

Quimberly removes her blindfold. "No. I’ve decided that this challenge is beneath me."

"That’s weird," Tamira comments from off stage. Grace nods.

"We don’t deserve her," One of the judges insists, as the others nod.

The judges consult with each other. After the contestants gather on stage, Luke now dressed in a barrel, Esme announces, "The judges will now announce the winner of the talent show."

"After careful consideration," One of the judges announces, "we have decided that the winner, with a perfect score is…" The contestants are shown looking nervous, besides Quimberly glaring to the side. "Luke, with his impressive burlesque routine."

"Burlesque?" Luke repeats as he blinks, his face bright red. "Golly. All I did was drop trou."

Tamira assures, "Some people are just naturals. I’ll give you my hubbies contact information after the show." Luke further looks confused.

Esme announces, "That means that Luke is invincible, and cannot be voted out." Tamira and Grace exchange glances. "Chris will meet you for your next campfire ceremony."

At the campfire ceremony, Chris tosses out marshmallows. "Let’s get this over with, so I can get back to my nice, dry den. These mushy marshmallows go to Luke, Grace, Tamira, Dirk, and Herman." Herman gets hit in the face with his marshmallow, which sticks to his face. "The final one belongs to…" Quimberly and Blair both look disinterested or confident respectively.

"Quimberly." Quimberly catches her marshmallow. Grace looks over at her.

Grace leans in toward Tamira. "Is it just me or does Quimberly look… relieved?"

Blair stands up and assures, "I’m going to miss everyone. Thanks for making this season much more enjoyable than the last time. It’s been an honor to compete with each of you. I wish all of you loads of luck."

"Even me?" Dirk asks.

Blair thinks for a moment. She assures, "Even you."

Most of the contestants surround Blair in a group hug. "We’re going to miss you, too, girl," Grace assures.

Blair pulls out a piece of paper. She states, "Thankfully, I have a message prepared for each of you. Dirk, you may be a jerk, but at least you wear tight jeans. Tamira, I first thought of you as an unwanted aunt, but deep inside… Ack!"

Chris shoves Blair toward The Dock of Shame. He announces, "That’s enough of that. We have a schedule to maintain." Blair waves as she boards The Boat of Losers.

Chris turns toward the camera. He announces, "Another elimination, and we are one step closer to our finals. Who will be the winner, and who will be eliminated next? Find out next time on Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst!"

Tamira is shown in confessional. She admits, "I hope we made the right decision. I love Blair, and all… It’s just that we need to avoid any potential couples, and Luke was invincible. While it may seem dumb not to vote out Quimberly while we have a chance... If you haven’t noticed… For whatever reason, that girl is not even trying in the challenges, anymore." Tamira tilts her head to the side. She waves as she says, "Until next time, toodles."

On The Boat of Losers, Blair explains, "I thought I had built some pretty solid relationships this time around, you know? There are my girls, and then Luke… At first I thought he was just guy candy, and then I got to know him…" Blair looks out at the water. "He’s always following me around and interrupting me, like a… annoying kid brother. I wonder if laser eye surgery would burn the image of him naked out of my mind." Blair shudders.

### Chapter 13 - Match, Game, and Set

Chris appears on screen with a big frown on his face in a yellow rain hat and raincoat. Amidst a great downpour, the host admits, "Now I remember why we filmed in the Tropics a few years ago." He sighs. "Last time, our players competed in a talent show, where it was pretty much a train wreck… The way we like it here on Total Drama. Anyway… Old Luke let it all hang out, and earned invincibility. Blair said her goodbyes, and goodbyes, and goodbyes." Chris continues to look nonplused. "We have a big episode in store for you featuring two of the biggest names to compete on Total Drama. Who is it?" Chris shrugs. "I can’t be bothered to care about that right now with this darn rain. Stay tuned if you feel like it." Chris states, "That’s a wrap. If you need me, I’ll be taking a bubble bath… Don’t need me." Chris stomps off, as his boots make a slushing sound.

Dirk walks along outside. He approaches Esme, who is speaking with an intern. She frowns and puts a hand over her face. She says, "Chris is not going to like this."

"Maybe we can handle it on our own," The intern suggests with a wince and forced smile.

Esme frowns. She admits, "He didn’t seem to want to be bothered, and men like women that take initiative." Esme has a hand placed under her chin.

Dirk responds, "Since…" He pauses. "Never mind."

Esme looks over at Dirk. She says, "Oh! Just who I wanted to see."

Dirk looks around himself and then points at himself. "Me?"

Esme nods. She explains, "Zane is sitting with Evan. We’re short staffed, and need his help. I know you’ve been sitting with Evan, so it would be great if you could join him."

"Normally I would," Dirk assures. "But I have important plans tonight."

Esme puts her hands on her hips. She says, "I suppose if a man asked you, you would do it."

Dirk looks taken aback. "I deserve that." He insists, "It’s nothing like that, though. But, I…”

"It’ll just be for a few hours," Esme assures.

Dirk looks down. He replies, "Uh. Yeah. I can do that."

Esme clasps her hands together. "Perfect! Go ahead and tell Zane he can meet me by headquarters." Dirk nods. He begins walking away. He turns around for a moment and lifts a finger in the air. Esme is turned to the intern. She explains, "It looks like, due to all the rain and the resulting flooding, we’ll need to transfer some important documents, and… items to a safer location. But where is a secure enough place?" She thinks for a moment, returning her hand under her chin. "I have an idea. I suppose only me, Chris, and Nurse Bigby have the credentials needed to enter there, but I know we can trust him." Dirk blinks for a moment. He turns toward the medical tent and proceeds in that direction.

In confessional, Dirk admits, "I refuse to break my date with Bigby. I’m sure he’ll understand, though, if I’m a little bit late. Evan should be the top priority.” Dirk slams a fist in an empty hand.

Dirk approaches a sleeping Zane, sitting in one of two chairs set across from Evan. Dirk shakes Zane by the shoulders and he abruptly jolts awake. He states with a shock, "But dad, how was I supposed to know they weren’t really magic beans?"He looks at Dirk. "Oh, it’s just you. I thought you weren’t able to sit with Evan, tonight."

Dirk explains, "There’s been a slight change of plans. Esme says she needs you to help transfer some important stuff to a safer place because of some flooding, or something." Dirk has a finger in his ear. "But don’t take forever, I really can’t stay all night this time, as much as I want to help Evan where I can."

Zane stands and nods. He assures, "I won’t. Thanks again for your help. I don’t care what those internet forums say, you’re a good guy."

Dirk looks to the side, and adds, "I wouldn’t go that far." He scratches his chin. "Oh, right. She said to meet her at the headquarters." Zane nods and turns toward the exit. Dirk adds, "Wait a second, Zane. Do you have a marker for Evan’s casts?" Zane nods and hands him one. Dirk finds a piece of paper and approaches Evan. He writes something on the paper with it placed on Evan’s face. He turns back around and hands the paper to Zane.

Zane reads the note, "Hey, this is Dirk. Sorry I can’t make it on time, but I’ll be there in a few hours." He looks up at Dirk. "You know there’s no y in ‘time’, right?"

Dirk ignores Zane’s correction and requests, "Could you pass that on to Nurse Bigby? His residence is near headquarters, if I remember right."

Zane responds, "Bigby?" He nods. "Yeah, it’s over there. No problem." He folds the note before putting it in his pocket. "Hey, thanks again for this. You’re truly a good friend."

Luke walks in to Evan’s room. He says, "Oh, beg my pardon, Zane. I didn’t know y’all was in here. I can come back another time."

Zane assures, "I was just leaving. Have a nice night, gentlemen." Zane steps out.

Dirk says, "Oh hey, Luke. What brings you in?"

Luke explains, "I thought I’d step in to check in on Evan while I wait." Luke blinks. "Golly. He had his casts removed?"

Dirk nods. He adds, "On his arms, anyway." Dirk looks at Evan for a moment. He then turns his attention to Luke. Luke looks conflicted. "Is everything okay, buddy?"

Luke assures, "Yes, I…" He frowns. "I’ve just been done a lot of thinking."

"About?" Dirk asks with an eyebrow raised.

Luke explains, "Being with my family is great and all, but I still get lonely, sometimes. I was having feelings for Blair…"

"Blair?" Dirk looks shocked. "Yay high?" He holds a hand around his waist. "Ginger?"

Luke sighs. "That’s the one. But unfortunately it’s not in the cards between us. She told me she isn’t attracted to me like that."

"Blair?" Dirk repeats. "And she saw your talent?"

Luke nods. "But it got me thinking… I feel like I done been using my… problems… as an excuse not to reach out. There was a girl my season I had a liking of, but I pushed her aside… I wish I knew what to do… Part of me wants to reach out to her, again, and see if she still feels the same way about me, but… I’m scared."

"I say go for it," Dirk states.

"You do?" Luke asks. Dirk nods. Luke smiles. He slaps his knees and assures, "I’m gonna do it. Thanks for the reassurance."

"Sure." Dirk adds, "Uh. Hey, pal. I’ve been meaning to talk to you about sum’thin’… Now that you know that Bigby and I are… you know." Luke nods. Dirk puts a hand on the back of his head, as he looks to the side. "He’s just so… And I’m just… You know?”

Luke’s expression looks blank. "I reckon I don’t."

Dirk admits, "I guess I’ve been wondering what he sees in me. He’s just so perfect, and I… don’t have a whole lot going for me… back home, that is…"

Luke smiles and says, "Don’t under sell yourself. You’re a great guy. I’m sure whatever is going on at home ain’t as bad as you make it sound."

Dirk assures, "There’s something I need to get off my chest, man. Just try not to judge me."

Luke raises an eyebrow. He assures, "Who am I to judge?"

Dirk looks up and states, "I don’t know… The thing is that I sort of lied to Bigby about something."

Luke replies, "I’m sure it’s not a big deal, whatever it is."

"Yeah," Dirk responds as he looks aside, again. "The truth is, I…"

"Luke, sweetie, I’m back with your medication," a voice from outside the tent flap states. Thunder can be heard from outside.

Luke jolts, abruptly. He says, "My apologies, Dirk. That’s Esme with my medication. I guess, her, Chris, and Bigby are the only ones with access to my meds. And on account of it being Bigby’s night off, she came to help me out."

"I guess I overheard something about that, about how they had to transfer some important stuff to the secure medical area," Dirk explains.

Luke insists, “I’ll be back in a couple minutes."

Dirk forces a smile. He assures, "It’s nothing. Hey… It’s late. You should head back to the cabin after all that. It sounds like we’ve got a big storm comin’."

"You sure?" Luke asks. Dirk nods. "Well, if you’re sure…"

Dirk adds, "Hey, do you know why Esme has never come to visit Evan? I thought she was into guys like him."

Luke shrugs his shoulders. "I really don’t have any idea." He smiles. "Have a nice night fellers." Luke heads out.

Dirk holds his head down, and puts his arms over his head. Evan coughs. Dirk abruptly sits up in his chair. Evan asks, gruffly, "What’s going on? What’s that about securing… stuff?"

"Bones? You’re awake… how much of that did you hear?" Dirk pulls his chair close to Evan’s bed.

Evan replies, "Enough to know you’re working yourself up about something." Dirk looks away from Evan. "What is it?"

Dirk assures, "I don’t think you would understand. It’s a relationship thing."

Evan lowers his eyebrows. "Are you serious? I’ve been in so many relationships."

Dirk rolls his eyes. He adds, "Yeah, and all at one time." Evan’s eyes widen. Dirk frowns as he blinks. He says, "Sorry, I didn’t mean to…"

Evan laughs. He says, "That was a good one."

"It was?" Dirk asks.

Evan nods. He winces and says, "Ow." Evan assures, "I prefer it when you act like yourself, not like what you think that overmuscled man child wants you to be."

Dirk looks surprised, then irritated. "Don’t talk about Bigby like that. He’s a real man."

"Debatable," Evan adds as he glares to the side.

"I get why you don’t like me," Dirk assures. "But you have no reason to bash Bigby." Dirk’s eyes get wide. "You’re not a homophobe, are you? I know he’s a little flamboyant, and all. But that’s not an excuse." Dirk rolls up his sleeves.

Evan’s right eye gets wide. He responds, "What? No. I’m not like your homophobic frat. I like gay guys."

"Wait, what?" Dirk asks. "What are you talking about? They’re not homophobes."

"All of your stories would say otherwise," Evan adds. "They sound like a bunch of gay bashers." Dirk scratches his head. He pauses for a moment. Dirk breaks out into laughter. "What’s so funny?"

Dirk wipes his eyes. He explains, "My frat, Gamma Alpha Upsilon? It’s an all gay frat."

"Wait, you mean… all of them?" Evan asks. Dirk nods.

Dirk explains, "Yeah. I didn’t realize it at first. I did notice the guys had great skin, and a lot of mesh cut off shirts, but I joined without knowing. I guess it should have been a tip off when their advertisements around campus read ‘Do you love guys? Join Gamma Alpha Upsilon.’ In retrospect, it all made sense, but… Heck, they’re the reason I found out I was gay." He looks aside. "Uh. Not to get into too much detail." Evan’s face turns slightly red. "I’m sure you don’t want to hear about that."

Evan clears his throat. He assures, "No. It’s not a problem. I’m pretty open, myself. Hey, I’m sorry for how I treated you earlier in the competition."

"Nah," Dirk replies. "I’m the one who should apologize. I judged you without even knowing you. I guess I heard all those rumors about you being a womanizer and just wasn’t interested in giving you a chance."

"I’m done with women," Evan announces dramatically.

Dirks eyes get big. He points to some of the medical equipment. "What do they have you on?"

"I’m serious," Evan replies. He coughs. Dirk puts a hand on Evan’s shoulder. Evan smiles. "I’m okay. Don’t worry." He frowns as he looks at Dirk. "When I got real sick again, my girl… friends ran off with each other… They left me with nothing, man. I thought they really loved me, but I realized I’m on my own. Now that I’m not that star athlete. The media… my fans… Nobody cares about me."

Dirk rubs Evan’s shoulder. "You can’t say that. You got me, now." Evan looks intently at Dirk. Dirk looks back at Evan. His cheeks start getting red. "Uh…"

"Hey, guys," Zane states as he walks in. "Oh, hey! Evan’s awake! Anyway, sorry I’m late. I didn’t mean to take three hours, and all, but…"

"Three hours?" Dirk repeats. "It felt like a few minutes…" He looks at Evan. "Uh… I better get going."

Zane states, "Sure, man. I just want to hit the john before you go. I’ll just be a few minutes." Zane walks out, again.

"I hope Bigby isn’t upset with me being later than I thought I would be," Dirk states. Dirk stands up. He looks down at Evan. Evan places a hand weakly on Dirk’s arm.

Evan pleads, "Dirk… Please don’t go. I don’t trust that Bigby guy."

"Nah," Dirk replies. "What do you have against him, again? He’s the best guy I ever met… Besides Angelo."

Evan sighs. He states, "You’re going to think I’m crazy… I don’t think I ever broke my leg."

Dirk looks down at Evan’s leg, still in a cast. He insists, "It looks pretty broke to me."

Evan shakes his head. He adds, "Ow." He explains, "I meant at the challenge where I tampered… I mean, where the bridge accidentally fell. I remember my arms, sure, before I blacked out. The real kicker…"

"No pun intended," Dirk adds with a frown.

Evan continues, "One night, I woke up… It was real dark, and everything was kind of blurry, like, but I noticed on the tent wall…" Evan gulps. "Something terrifying."

"What was it?" Dirk asks.

Evan explains, "It was the shadow of Bigby…" Lightning flashes, and thunder crashes soon after. "He was standing over my bed with a sledgehammer. I was so shocked, I passed out almost immediately. He was the one that broke my leg. I know it."

Dirk blinks. He says, "You’re serious?"

"Dead serious," Evan assures. "That guy is not what he seems. You have to have noticed something off about him."

Dirk insists, "Of course not. He’s a great person." He pauses for a moment. "I mean, he said something about doing anything to get on the show… and he got really…" Dirk looks grim. "Heated." He forces a smile. "But he wouldn’t hurt a fly."

Evan lowers his brow as he nods to a corner of the room. Dirk looks over in that direction and sees a glue trap with several dead flies stuck to it. Evan states, "I think I just heard one of them say ‘help me’.”

"You’re sure it was him?" Dirk asks with a raised eyebrow. "It could have been that intern that went off the rails."

"Do you know any other guys on the island that look like him?" Evan asks.

Dirk blinks. "Maybe you were dreaming, or…"

Evan insists, "No. If it was one of my dreams there would have been at least two people wearing bikinis flying around with angel wings."

Dirk looks thoughtfully at Evan. He responds. "I don’t know, Bones. It all seems a little bit…"

"Alright, fellas," Zane states, as he enters the room, again. Both Evan and Dirk are startled. "Dirk, you’re good to go." Zane turns as he hangs his raincoat on a hook. "Oh, right. I delivered that note to Bigby just like you asked."

Evan reaches out, again, and puts a hand on Dirk’s arm. Evan is wide eyed as he looks into Dirk’s eyes. Dirk looks down and to the side. He turns and walks toward the tent flap. He hesitates, and looks back at a disappointed looking Evan. Dirk’s brow looks heavy. Dirk turns and exits Evan’s room.

Zane bottom lip protrudes as his hefty eyebrows raise. He asks, "Did I walk into something?”

Herman is shown in his cabin. He looks over his shoulder only to see nothing there. He turns to a camera and asks, "Doest thou ever get the feeling that thou art not alone? I mean, Luke and Dirk are barely ever here, but I doth still feel a looming presence…"  A shadowed figure can be seen outside of the window.

In the women’s cabin, Quimberly enters from outside. She removes her raincoat, and puts a backpack on her bed. Grace and Tamira look on as Quimberly stands with her back turned to her competitors. She lets out a deep sigh, before returning something to her bag. She then climbs into a bunk bed and then hangs from the side before falling asleep.

Tamira looks at Grace and whispers, "I wonder what’s in the bag."

Grace’s eyes shift from Tamira, to the bag, and then back to Tamira. She responds, "Isn’t she entitled to a secret?"

"You would know all about that," Tamira responds. She places a finger to her chin. "I seem to recall your hitting that button when Hedda was here."

Grace changes the subject. "I want to know what it is, too. I think you should go for it?" Grace says this with a wince.

"Me?," Tamira states as she places a hand on her neck. "I can only imagine how quickly she can snap a neck."

"Give me a break," Grace responds with an eye roll.

Tamira replies, "I can’t. It’s my best feature."

Grace says, "Then I’ll do it. It’ll be like the good old days with Patsy." She stands up, takes a step toward Quimberly’s bag, just as Quimberly’s eye twitches in her sleep. Grace quickly dives under her blanket. She states, "I would say that was a success." Tamira nods. Both women quickly place their heads on the pillow on their respective beds.

Outside of the staff residences, Dirk takes a deep breath before knocking on the door. He stands under an awning and looks up as the rain continues to downpour. He looks back at the door for a moment, before looking back at the rain. "Bigby sure is taking his time. It’s like he wasn’t expecting…" A loud clash of thunder echoes through the sky, causing Dirk to jump toward the building. He looks up to see Bigby with the door open, holding him in his arms. "Bigby?"

"Dirk?" Bigby asks. "What are you doing here?" He sets Dirk down. After doing so, he adjusts the bathrobe he is wearing.

Dirk raises an eyebrow. He says, "Sorry I’m late…" He looks up and down at Bigby’s ensemble. "Didn’t we have plans tonight?"

"We did," Bigby agrees. He looks fairly annoyed. He holds up the note delivered by Zane. "Zane gave me this. It says you weren’t going to make it."

Dirk scratches his head. He states, "Did I write that? I thought I said I’d just be a few hours late."

"Let me read it back to you." Bigby reads the note, "’Hey, this is Dirk. Sorry I can’t make it…’"

"I could have sworn I wrote more than that," Dirk admits. He scratches his head, again. "I guess I’ll just… leave, then."

Bigby’s eyes get wide. He unfolds the piece of paper. He puts a hand over his face. "Dirk. I’m so sorry. I didn’t see the whole message. That’s my bad. I was really looking forward to spending time with you… You know… Not in the medical tent." Bigby steps back. "Come on in."

Dirk looks around. He whistles and says, "This place is kind of swanky." He looks around at the mostly green room, noting the artwork on the wall that reaffirms Bigby’s love for the Total Drama series.

"Thanks," Bigby says as he holds a hand behind his head. "With most of the staff injured, or… you know… getting fired, I got an upgrade. I just wish I could enjoy it more."

Dirk looks at Bigby. "Digging the bathrobe."

Bigby looks down. His rosy cheeks turn a brighter shade of red. He states, "Look at me, I’m not even dressed."

Dirk smiles awkwardly. He assures, "I don’t mind."

"Here," Bigby states. "You sit here while I slip into something more comfortable." He picks up a remote and points it at a stereo. Bigby steps into another room with the door slightly ajar.

Dirk comments to himself, "What’s more comfortable than a bathrobe?" Dirk looks at the stereo with wide eyes as an instrumental version of the theme to Total Drama begins to play.

Bigby calls out from the other room. "I actually have a pretty big surprise for you. I hope you like it."

Dirk mutters, "I didn’t think to bring anything." He digs through his pockets in the hope of finding something.

Bigby calls out, "I prepared some green tea earlier. It’s still on the table, so feel free to help yourself, babe."

Dirk smiles awkwardly. "Babe? I need to get used to that." Dirk is startled by the sudden sound of scraping outside. He jumps back in his chair. Dirk calls out to Bigby, "I think someone is at the door?"

"Do you mind getting it?" Bigby asks. "I’m not sure who it could be."

Dirk nods. He thinks for a second, before verbalizing, "Sure. I got it." Dirk gets up and walks toward the entrance. The scraping sound begins again. Dirk gulps before opening the door. He gasps at a gaunt figure in the doorway wearing a yellow rain coat, the hood obscuring their face. The figure holds up a pick axe as lightning crashes behind them. Dirk puts his arms over his head and pleads, ”Please don’t hurt me, I was hoping to get past first base tonight."

"What’s that, now?" The figure asks. He removes his hood before realizing, "You’re not my grandson."

"Grandson?" Dirk asks. His eyes still show his fear. "Why are you holding that pickaxe?"

The old man looks over at the pickaxe. "Well, I’ll be. You’re darn tootin’."

Dirk puts a hand over his stomach. "You heard that? Wait. You’re that old timey prospector that judged that challenge early on."

The prospector nods. He states, "You must be my grandson’s latest boy toy."

"Well…" Dirk begins, blushing slightly.

"I hope you last," the prospector admits. "All the others seem to disappear out of no place."

"Thanks, old timey prospector," Dirk replies. "Wait…" Dirk’s eyes are wide.

The prospector insists, "You can call me Grandpappy."

"Uh, sure, Grandpappy," Dirk complies. "Er. You’re Bigby’s grandfather, huh?"

"Yes’m," Grandpappy answers.

Dirk blinks. "He doesn’t look like you did when you were his age, does he?"

"No, siree," Grandpappy replies. "The big boy takes after his mother’s side, the poor kid."

Dirk breathes a sigh of relief. He has a look of realization. Dirk says, "What am I doing? Bigby is just getting dressed."

Grandpappy laughs, "Eeheehee! The boy is a tiger, just like his old Grandpappy."

Dirk blinks. "No. We didn’t… Uh. Why don’t you step inside? He should be out soon."

"No need, sonny," Grandpappy assures. "I won’t be staying. I just came to return this!" Grandpappy raises the pickaxe, as lightning flashes, again.

"A pickaxe?" Dirk asks.

Grandpappy looks at the pickaxe. He blinks. "Wowee. I’m starting to lose it in my old age." He sets down the pickaxe, as Dirk laughs slightly. Grandpappy shifts something around inside his raincoat. He holds up a sledgehammer.

Dirk gasps. He asks, "Is that a…"

"Sledgehammer," Grandpappy answers. "Little Bigby let me borrow this sucker. It had a little viscera on it, otherwise it was in perfect working order."

"Viscera," Dirk repeats.

Grandpappy nods and says, "That’s right. He said he was using it for a meat tenderizer." Grandpappy eyes the tool for a moment. "This baby is perfect for smashing all sorts of things. He calls it the old Bone Breaker. Eeheehee!"

"Bone Breaker?" Dirk repeats, with wide eyes.

Grandpappy raises an eyebrow as he looks at Dirk. "Sonny, you got a personality like an echo. Tell the little dickens, I said ‘howdy doo’. I better get back to my outhouse before the storm gets any worse. Take care of yourself. Hope you last a little longer than the others." The old man puts his hood back up before heading outside. His laughter fades into the night.

Dirk repeats, "Longer than the others?" Dirk shrugs, closes the door, and leans the sledgehammer against an armchair. "What a crazy old coot." Dirk sits back in his chair. He pours some of the cold green tea into a cup, and looks around.

"Who was it, babe?" Bigby calls out.

"Oh. Your Grandpappy," Dirk answers. "He was returning a sledgehammer.”

"Oh, that," Bigby responds. "I forgot I lended it to him. I wish I could have said hi."

"Sorry," Dirk responds. "He seemed like he was in a hurry, though."

Bigby laughs. "That sounds about right. Make yourself at home. I’ll be out soon… I’m so excited for this…"

Dirk responds, "Me, too… babe." Dirk smiles. He looks at the coffee table next to him. He notices Bigby’s lanyard splayed across the table. His attention shifts to a framed photograph on the table. He picks up the pink frame to get a better look at it. He sees a picture of two thin young men wearing identical striped shirts. He asks, "Who are the twinks in the photo on the table?" Dirk sips some tea.

"Oh, that?" Bigby calls out. "That’s me."

"What?" Dirk asks. "You look so different." Dirk takes another sip of tea. "I didn’t know you had a twin."

Bigby asks, "A twin?" Bigby laughs. "Oh, that. That’s my first boyfriend, Jimmie."

Dirk does a double take at the photo. He asks, "Boyfriend? But you look almost identical." Dirk takes a closer look at the photo.

Bigby states, "I guess that was kind of the point… I wonder whatever happened to him. He sort of dropped off the face of the earth soon after that picture was taken."

Dirk begins, "He… did?" Dirk blinks. "I still can’t get over the likeness.” Dirk sips some more tea.

"Okay, I’m ready." Bigby emerges from the other room. Bigby is dressed in a yellow mullet wig, a jean vest, grey shirt, and jeans. "It’s not quite done, yet. But I was just too excited to show you… I just have to finish the yellow threading on the lapel, but I got this side done." Bigby gestures with his hand flat under the lapel. "What do you think?”

Dirk looks up at Bigby and spits out the tea in his mouth all over the picture frame. "What are you…"

"I’m you!" Bigby explains. "Pretty impressive, right? It helped to study your vest when I was drying your clothes. I consider it some of my best work."

"Uh, it’s great…" Dirk assures. He stands up. "It’s getting pretty late."

Bigby frowns. He says, "You don’t like it."

"No, no," Dirk insists. "You look insane… I mean… In a good way. I just had a long night, you know, with sitting with Evan, and…" Dirk fakes a yawn. "The whole challenge and all. Hey, we should do this again."

Bigby steps in front of the door. He picks up the sledgehammer and rests it on his shoulder. Dirk’s eyes widen as he looks at the sledgehammer. Bigby admits, "This is the closest I’ll ever get to being a contestant on the show. I thought you would be happy."

Dirk gulps. He assures, "Look." He grimaces. "I can’t say I never had this fantasy, but I should really get going."

Bigby looks out the window. He turns back to Dirk and says, "I can’t let you leave."

"Eep!" Dirk reacts. He looks around. He says to himself, "I need a miracle right now…" Almost immediately, a big crack of lightning strikes nearby, with accompanying deafening thunder. Bigby looks behind him just as the lights in the room go out, leaving the room entirely dark.

"Dirk!" Bigby calls out. "Stay right there."

"You would like that wouldn’t you?" Dirk replies.

"Um," Bigby responds. "Yeah? I don’t want you to get hurt. Dirk?" From inside, a loud thud and crashing sound is audible.

The door abruptly opens, and Dirk’s shadowy frame can be seen running out of the Nurse’s residence. "See ya!" Dirk can be heard shouting as he quickly gets further away.

The lights come back on, revealing Bigby’s legs over a chair, and him lying on the floor flat on his back, his wig caught on the chair. He groans. "Bigby?" Someone asks. "What are you doing all sprawled out like that, sonny?”

”Dirk? You came back?" Bigby asks.

Grandpappy helps Bigby to his feet. "Dirk? Is that the looker from earlier? He lasted longer than your last ex. That’s for sure. Eeheehee! Why are you dressed like he was? Is that what the kids are into these days, sonny?"

Bigby rolls his eyes. "It’s called cosplay, pappy. I started working on it before I met him, but I think he thought it was weird." He looks out the door. "I hope he’s okay. I didn’t want him to go out in the storm."

Grandpappy asks, "Did he get you your sledgehammer back?"

"Yeah," Bigby confirms. He admits, "I’m glad to have it back. It came in handy when the tent pins for the medical tent were getting loose."

Grandpappy leans down and picks up the picture frame. He spits on it with a ‘ptooey’ and then wipes it clean with his sleeve. "I remember this feller. Wasn’t this taken on Halloween night? What did you call this? Crossplay?"

Bigby nods. He explains, "We were genderbending two of my favorites from Total Drama. I wonder why Dirk got so hung up on this."

"This kid fell off the face of the earth," Grandpappy comments, matter of factly.

"You make it sound so dramatic, Grandpappy. He just went to college across the country," Bigby explains. "We couldn’t make the long distance thing work." Bigby frowns and looks down. "I have a feeling things are over between Dirk and I. I just don’t get why everyone I’m interested in just leaves."

Grandpappy places a hand on his shoulder. "I have a feeling things will turn out for you." Grandpappy spits into the corner of the room. "By the way, you dropped this when you lent me your hammer, sonny." Grandpappy holds out a small card.

Bigby looks at the business card with Reginald’s information on it. He quietly says, "I forgot about this…"

Dirk rushes into Evan’s room in the medical tent. He rushes past Zane who is fast asleep, snoring with his head hanging behind his chair. Dirk kneels next to Evan’s bed and takes his hand in his gently. He admits, "You were right." Evan looks surprised.

The following day, Esme checks off something on her clipboard. Her walkie talkie abruptly goes off, "Assistant Host Esme?"

Esme picks up her walkie talkie. "Go ahead."

The voice on the other end, belonging to one of two remaining interns, says, "We’ve got a situation."

Esme pinches the bridge of her nose and lets out a sigh. She asks, "What happened? Does Chris know about it?"

"That’s part of it," the voice confirms. "We can’t find Chris, anywhere." Esme shakes her head. "It also looks like something important has gone missing. I’m at the medical tent, right now."

Esme asks, "What? So it was just the medical tent?"

"It looks like it," the intern assures. "Why?"

"No reason," Esme assures. "I’ll meet you shortly, don’t move." Dressed in a lavender rain coat with a hood, Esme walks out from underneath an awning. She quickly slips and falls in the mud, sliding a few meters. She laments, "Nothing is going right, today. First our guest stars, now Chris is MIA." A meaty hand reaches down toward Esme. She takes the hand in hers. She looks glad for a moment. She looks up and says, "Oh. It’s you."

Dirk laughs as he helps Esme to her feet. She brushes herself off. Dirk responds, "I deserve that."

Dirk is clad in his blue swimsuit and carrying a small messenger bag. Esme eyes him up. She looks surprised. "Why are you wearing a swimsuit?"

Dirk explains, "I keep misplacing my rain gear and then my clothes get soaked. I figured this way I’m wearing something that’s made for getting wet."

Esme responds, "I see. Well, I should be…"

"You know…" Dirk replies. "This rain is doing wonders for your skin. You look really… nice." Dirk seems to gag for a moment.

"I do?" Esme asks as she brushes a water logged tuft of hair away from her face. Her cheeks are slightly red. "Aren’t you…"

Dirk continues, as he places a hand to the back of his head. "Hey, as you know… I’ve been hanging back with Evan."

"Oh," Esme asks. She places a hand on her opposite arm and asks, "How is he?"

Dirk admits, "He’s awake, now."

"Oh, really?" She heaves a deep sigh. "That’s great news."

"Yeah," Dirk agrees. "He just… said that he wonders why you haven’t visited him."

Esme looks taken aback. She responds, "Oh, well… It’s just been really busy, what with the rain, and being super short staffed…"

Dirk smiles. "If that’s all, then that’s good. He was worried that maybe you weren’t actually concerned about his well-being, or something, and only talked to him because of his looks, or something."

Esme forces a smile. She assures, "Oh, no. It wasn’t that at all. Like I said. I was just… busy. I promise, I’ll visit him as soon as possible."

Dirk slicks back his hair and then shakes his head, splashing water all over. Esme winces. Dirk smiles wide. "He says would really like that. Don’t tell him I said this… But I think he has a bit of a crush on you, and he says wanted to see you more than anyone else…" Dirk’s eyes widen. He adds, "Don’t tell him I said that, either."

"He did?" Esme asks, her face slightly red. "I mean, I won’t tell."

"Alright, I best get a move on," Dirk assures.

Esme asks, "Dirk?" He turns toward her. "With us being super short staffed, would you be able to gather everyone to where he held the last challenge? That would be a super huge help."

Dirk tilts his head to the side and assures, "No problem. I just have to stop off at… somewhere… and then I’ll get right on top of that." Dirk turns and walks forward. Esme looks after him and smiles.

The remaining contestants are gathered on a stage, each sitting behind a long desk with two rows, one above the other. "Like, where are the hosts?" Tamira asks.

Dirk assures, "Esme says she wanted me to gather you all here. I’m sure she will be here any…"

Esme frantically walks into the room, clutching her clipboard. She apologizes, "Sorry, I’m late, everyone."

"Golly," Luke says. "Is everything alright? I reckon you look like a mother hen mid-hailstorm."

"Don’t mention hail," Esme insists. "It might happen." What sounds like pellets hitting the roof of the building can start being heard. Esme lets out a sigh. She explains, "Unfortunately, due to the storm, our celebrity guests stars were unable to join us."

"Aw, man," Tamira responds with a pout. "You mean my chances at getting discovered have decreased?"

Dirk adds, "You mean like one of those Neanderthal people?" Tamira glares at Dirk. Dirk scratches his head and asks, "What?"

Esme apologizes, "Unfortunately, yes. Chris did leave me a message, however, with some special instructions. I just haven’t had an opportunity to read it." Esme holds up a note that is soaking wet. She frowns before ringing out the soggy piece of paper. She looks over the note. She then looks up at the contestants. "It looks here like Chris has a back up plan."

Grace asks with a smirk, "Does it involve selling our vital organs for a quick buck?"

Esme smiles and shakes her head. She explains, "No. He said there’s a television just off stage that we can set up for more information. One of the interns is already on top of it." The burly woman intern pushes a monitor on a cart onto the stage before exiting. Esme turns on the television.

Chris appears on screen with a wide smile. He pulls off a pair of sunglasses and explains, "Welcome, campers! You’ll notice I’m no longer on the island due to… an emergency at home. The storm continues to rage here on the mainland, so I don’t have it much better than you all."

Grace rolls her eyes and says, "He’s probably in Cabo."

Luke insists, "I reckon Chris wouldn’t abandon us like that."

Chris continues, "Despite not being able to make it there in person, I’m here with the legendary biggest success story of our show’s history."

"No way," Tamira reacts. She lowers her sunglasses.

"That’s right!" Chris announces. "It’s comedy legend, Libby!" The contestants all gasp, including Quimberly.

Dirk adds, "She proves women can almost be funny." The present women glares at Dirk.

In an oversized coat, Libby states, "Hey everyone. I’m here despite my better judgement. My career has gotten so huge, I thought that maybe this experience will curb it a little." The contestants burst out in laughter. "But seriously. This appearance counts as community service, right? You laugh when an officer loses his toupee, one time… I thought he’d appreciate the visibility from posting the footage on social media…" Everyone laughs, again.

"Haha!" Chris wipes away a tear after laughing and goes on, ”And our second special guest was an industry icon before gracing us on our show, but I like to think that our humble program helped propel her career on an upward trajectory."

"Just like the upward trajectory my lunch is going to make listening to your disillison," Libby adds. Everyone responds in a riotous uproar.

Chris finishes laughing, as he continues introducing the second guess, "She appeared as her shy alter ego, Ina Indiana, but today we have with us celebrity superstar Molly Cirrus!"

"Hey y’all!" Molly greets. "We’re coming to you live from definitely not Cabo for this challenge, y’all. I’m so happy to be in the presence of greatness."

"Aw, thank…" Chris begins.

"Libby," Molly clarifies. "I was talking about Libby."

Chris narrows his eyes and then laughs and says, "I’ll allow it."

"Golly," Luke says as he leans in toward Herman. "These are my two most favoritest famous people. I feel like I’ve got the best of both worlds."

"Verily," Herman agrees. "They art two of the only celebrities I know post renaissance."

Dirk asks, "Should I know who they are?" Luke and Herman glare at Dirk.

"Each of you has in front of you a stack of paper and a marker," Chris explains. "I will read a sentence with a word missing, all you have to do is write down a word to fill in the blank. If your answer matches one of our celebrities, you get a point. The person with the highest point total at the end will win invincibility. I’ll read the first question for Libby. Here goes. Dumb Dirk is so dumb…" Dirk’s eyes get wide. Chris shifts lips to the side and pretends to be an audience member. "How dumb is he? Dumb Dirk is so dumb that when he goes to the gym to deadlift, he brings his own blank!" Outdated music starts playing in the background as the contestants begin writing their answers.

Dirk blinks. He asks, "Is this about me?"

Chris shakes his head and assures with a smile, "No. It’s pure coincidence. Libby. Will you grace us with your answer, please?"

Libby looks bored as she taps on her podium. She states, "I don’t know. Maybe the career of whoever wrote that question?" Everyone breaks out in hysteric laughter.

Dirk says, "That was a good answer… You know. For a girl?" He forces a smile, as Libby glares at him.

Chris wipes away the tears as he refers to the contestants, "Herman, once we compose ourselves. We’re looking for the absolutely brilliant answer of ‘the career of whoever wrote that question’."

Herman, seated in the top left position on stage, responds, "I hath no hope to match the comedic stylings of our most beloved auburn haired guest."

Libby hold back laughter as she states, "That’s a whole lot of words for Herman just to say he isn’t funny."

Herman holds up his card with his answer written on it. He explains, "I wrote ‘Yorick’." The others blink.

"My case in point," Libby states with lowered eyelids.

"Moving on," Chris comments. "Grace, what is your answer to ‘Dumb Dirk is so dumb that when he goes to the gym to deadlift, he brings his own…"

Grace admits, "This doesn’t compare to Libby’s response, but I wrote…" She holds up her card. "Corpse."

Chris looks surprised. He replies, "I see we’re going with some black comedy, today."

"Watch it, Chris," Grace states with a glare.

Chris tugs at his collar. He corrects himself, "I mean, ‘dark humor’. Anyway, it’s sadly not a match. Dirk, you’re up. What did Dumb Dirk bring with him to the gym?"

Dirk replies, seated in the top right chair, "You see… I just can’t help but feel this question was written about me."

"Dirk, this episode isn’t all about you," Chris reprimands. "So what did you… I mean ‘Dumb Dirk’ bring with him?"

Dirk holds up his answer. He explains, "I said ‘jockstrap’. It’s just proper gym etiquette."

Libby stifles some laughter. She says, "Yup. That question really was not written about you." The others, including Dirk, laugh.

Chris states, "Now we most certainly are not going to get another answer that bad. Tamira? How do you fill in the blank?" Tamira is on the bottom left seat.

Tamira holds up her card. It reads, ‘Pink tartan. It is so last season.’

Chris frowns. He admits, "I spoke too soon." Libby laughs, again.

Tamira asks, "The camera isn’t going to zoom in on my hands, is it? It’s been weeks now since I’ve been able to get a decent manicure."

Chris ignores the question and asks, "Luke. When Dirk goes to the gym to deadlift, he brings his own blank?"

Luke blinks. He asks, "Was I supposed to write somethin’ funny? I just wrote…" Luke holds up his card. "Dumbbell… But now that I think about it, maybe it doesn’t make no kinda sense for him to bring a dumbbell, on account of a gym having plenty of weights for liftin’. Or maybe it’s funny because he didn’t think the gym would have their own weights. But… do I get any points because the question was about Dumb Dirk, and I wrote dumb in my answer?"

Chris looks blankly into the distance. He shakes with a start and asks, "You were beginning to remind me of Blair."

"Aw," Luke responds. "You’re too kind."

Chris announces, "No points for anyone, yet, but that most certainly will change with our last player, Quimberly."

Quimberly holds up her answer. It reads, ‘His aspirations’. The others burst out in laughter.

Libby raises an eyebrow. She quietly states, "A challenger has approached."

Chris turns his attention to Molly. "Tough act to follow." He smiles and explains, "Molly, it’s on to your turn."

Molly puts her hands up to her face. She admits, "Sweet giblets, I’m nervous I won’t come near the comedic genius next to me."

Libby assures, "Nobody has any expectations. Just channel your disgustingly saccharine bubblegum pop lyric writing skills into this."

Molly smiles, nods, and says, "Thanks. You’re great at ensuring confidence. I’m ready to go into this question like a wrecking ball, y’all."

Chris nods. He holds up an oddly skinny microphone and reads the question off of a card for Molly, "Due to a nationwide marshmallow shortage. The devastatingly handsome Chris McLean has started handing out blank at campfire ceremonies." The old school music begins to play again, as the players write down their answers. After a few minutes, Chris turns his attention back to Molly. "Molly Cirrus, how do you fill in the blank?"

Molly says, "Gosh. This is really tough. I don’t know what to say."

Chris assures with a comforting smile, "Don’t overthink it. Just say whatever comes to your mind."

"Okay," Molly says with a sharp nod. "My answer is ‘the last remaining shreds of his dignity’.”

Chris’ eyes get wide. Several contestants laugh or snicker. Grace whispers toward Herman and says, "I don’t think there’s enough of that to give out."

Chris lowers his brow. He states, "Let’s just skip this question, and move on to the final round." Chris tosses his card.

"Dagnabbit," Luke disappointedly states. He holds up his card that reads ‘the last shreds of his dignity’. "That’s what I wrote."

Tamira reveals as she whispers, "I wrote his supply of ‘Closeted Gray’ hair dye for old dudes."

Chris explains, "In this round, each of our celebrity guests will write an answer to a short phrase with a word missing. We will start in the order of seating. Each player will give an answer, and the first to match one of our celebrities will win invincibility. The phrase is ‘Total Drama Blank’! Guests stars, please write your answers." The dated sounding music plays once more while Libby quickly writes her response, and Molly has her tongue sticking out as she slowly writes something on her card. Chris states, "Okay. Our celebrities are all done writing their answers. We’ll start with Herman. How do you fill in the blank?"

Herman explains, "I doth feel the answer is most obvious. In homage to her royal majesty, I say ‘Total Drama Queen’."

The others blink. Chris addresses the guest stars and asks, "Did either of you write that answer?"

Molly admits, "Wow, I’m really not that good at this. I didn’t say that at all."

Libby assures, "You’re doing just fine. That was just a really really bad answer. It sounds like something Dumb Dirk would say." Herman buries his head in his hands, as Quimberly looks at him with a concerned look. Libby frowns. "Is my mic on?" Chris nods. Libby leans back in her chair and says, "Good. This is some of my best material."

Chris moves on, "Grace. How do you fill in the blank? Total Drama…"

Grace smirks. She states, "Given my background… I’ll say ‘Total Drama… Club’."

Chris puts his face in his hands. "Did either of you say that?" The guests shake their heads.

Libby laughs. "These answers are so bad they’re funny."

Chris sighs. He says, "Think about it. I’ll even slow it down for you. Total… Drama… Blank… Dirk?"

Dirk has his eyebrows raised. He responds, "Total… Drama… King?" Dirk forces a smile.

"For goodness…" Chris responds. "Think about what show you’re all on right now? Does anything spring to mind?" He turns his attention to Tamira. "Tamira. What do you have to say?"

Tamira raises an eyebrow. She says, "Total Drama… for your Mama?" Libby bursts out into laughter.

Chris throws his card down. He says, "Fine. That’s close enough. Tamira, you win invincibility."

"I do?" Tamira asks, with a surprised look.

"Golly," Luke says. "Here I was going to say something simple, like ‘island’."

"That’s not fair. What did the guests actually say?" Grace asks.

"I was inspired by Chris and wrote ‘midlife crisis’," Libby explains as she holds up her card. The others, besides Chris, laugh.

Molly admits, "I didn’t know how to spell it, so I drew this picture of a llama." Molly holds up her card.

"This was clearly a mistake for a challenge idea," Chris announces. "I have relinquished all hosting duties to Esme until the storm clears out, so you will be meeting with her at the next campfire ceremony, where one of you will be eliminated." Esme clutches her clipboard, as she looks surprised. "All that rain was making my hip ache."

"Titanium will do that," Libby adds with suppressed laughter. The others laugh.

Herman asks, "Did thou not declare that it hath been raining where thou art, as well?"

"Uh," Chris replies, "Yeah. Right, I… Uh… Say goodnight to our contestants, celebrity guests. It’s been a real…" Chris’ eyes show his surprise as he stumbles backwards and pulls at the velvet curtain as he falls on his back. The downed curtain reveals that it was hiding a sunny tropical location behind it.

"I was right about Cabo!" Grace exclaims as she points at the screen.

"What happened to Chris?" Esme asks.

Molly admits, "Since this is supposed to be a funny show, I thought it would be a good idea to tie Chris’ shoelaces together when he wasn’t looking. Shoot. Should I not have done that?"

"No, no. That’s the funniest thing that’s happened all day," Libby states, as she holds back laughter as everyone else laughs. Libby bursts out laughing, as well.

Chris stands up and grabs the camera with both hands and shouts, "Cut the cameras! I don’t know what I have to do to…"

The contestants and Esme watch as the screen turns black. "Well… that was a disaster," Esme comments. She turns to the campers and announces, "Sorry about all that. It looks like you’re stuck with me… and Zane. I’m sure we can make it a few more days without him.”

"It’s not like he added a whole lot, anyway," Quimberly assures.

"Yeah, girl," Grace adds. "You’ve already been doing a bulk of the work."

Esme blinks. She asks, "You really believe in me?"

Dirk adds, "You bet… I mean, we’re already scraping the bottom of the barrel with this cast, so you might as well host." The others glare at him. He asks, "What? Did I say something wrong?"

Grace, Tamira, and Quimberly walk together to their cabin. Tamira asks, "So what’s the plan?” Tamira pauses. She frowns and explains, "Omg. I totes forgot my sunglasses. I’ll join you guys in a minute."

As Tamira reenters the challenge building, she overhears Esme speaking over the walkie talkie, "You can’t be serious… Well, if it wasn’t me and with Chris not being here, that only leaves… You found some things in his apartment? But why would he… What? He took everything except for Luke’s medication? None of that makes any sense."

Tamira scratches her head. She says to herself, "I’ll get my glasses later."

At the campfire ceremony, Esme forces a smile. She assures, "Well… Here we are."

"Aren’t thou going to make a speech about how the marshmallow means life, and if we hath not received a marshmallow, we can’t come back… ever?" Herman asks.

Esme winces and responds, "Yeah, that… Let’s move on. Tamira. You earned invincibility, right?" Tamira nods. She tosses a marshmallow to Tamira, and hits Luke in the face. She winces. "Sorry. Tossing these is harder than it looks. Luke, you’re next, so…" She sticks out her tongue and closes an eye as she prepares to toss the next marshmallow.

Luke replies, "Golly… How about we just get up and grab our own so you don’t have to strain yourself."

"That’s not a bad idea," Esme states. "Um… So everyone except for Dirk and Grace, please step up and grab your marshmallows."

"I’m in the bottom?" Grace asks. She places a hand over her chest.

Esme assures, "Oh! Don’t feel too bad!"

Grace raises an eyebrow. She replies, "Oh… So that means I’m safe?"

Dirk frowns. He begins, "Wait, so I’m…"

Esme grimaces. She assures, "No, no.”

"I’m out, then?" Grace asks. Her lip begins to quiver.

Esme shakes her head. "I’m just going to reveal who the last marshmallow is for.” She holds up a marshmallow. "The last marshmallow goes to…"

Dirk catches the last marshmallow, and looks genuinely surprised. Esme apologizes, "Uh, sorry. That one was meant for Grace…" Esme winces. "If you don’t mind passing it down…"

Dirk stands up and tosses the marshmallow to Grace. Grace heaves a sigh of relief. Dirk responds, "Whatever." He walks a few steps. "Before I leave, can I talk to you privately, Esme?"

Esme assures, "Me? Uh, sure. Let me wrap up here." Dirk walks down to The Dock of Shame.

Luke cups his hands around his mouth and shouts, "Bye, Dirk! Love ya, buddy!" Luke thinks for a moment. "Platonic like, that is…"

Esme turns to the remaining players. She says, "Congratulations for making it this far. You are all free to return to your cabins." The contestants nod, as they pick up their things and leave the campfire ceremony.

Esme watches after them before walking down to The Dock of Shame to join Dirk. She asks, "Hey, Dirk. What did you want to talk about?”

Dirk puts a hand behind his head. He admits, "It’s been really tough watching you struggle."

"It’ll be okay," Esme assures, with a worried expression.

Dirk takes Esme’s hands in his as he offers, "I would like to stay on as an intern, in order to help you out some. You know I’ve already been helping out with Evan. You won’t have to pay me, or nothing. I just want to be a help for once."

Esme blushes. She assures, "I don’t know. We’ve never done anything like that before, and…" Esme sighs. She says, "Thanks for the offer. We can really use the extra set of biceps… I mean… hands. I accept your offer."

Dirk assures, "It’s the least I can do."

Esme puts her hands on her hips. "You know. I had my doubts about you, but you’ve really changed."

Dirk smiles. "You have no idea."

The previous night…

Dirk rushes into Evan’s room in the medical tent. He rushes past Zane who is fast asleep, snoring with his head hanging behind his chair. Dirk kneels next to Evan’s bed and takes his hand in his gently. He admits, "You were right." Evan looks surprised. Evan looks down at their hands. Dirk looks embarrassed as he apologizes, "Sorry. I forget you’re straight, sometimes."

Evan laughs. He requests, "Dirk… Come closer to me." Dirk nods and leans in toward Evan’s face. "A little closer."

Dirk nods and leans in more. "What did you want to say?" Evan moves slightly and kisses Dirk on the lips. Dirk’s eyes get wide. He pulls back. "Uh. Evan… I think maybe they got you on some heavy duty drugs… And I get that it’s been a while since you hooked up with anyone…"

"No," Evan replies. "I mean… it has. I’ve been single for longer than I would like, but you really don’t read the tabloids." Dirk shakes his head. Evan explains, "I’m pan, bro. Always have been, but I typically lean a lot more toward the ladies."

Dirk repeats, "Pan? Like that guy in the green tights that never gets older?"

Evan laughs. "You’re hilarious… It means pansexual. I’m attracted to everything, women, men, trans. None of that matters to me."

Dirk looks surprised. "I never heard of that… But you’re so…"

Evan lowers his good eyelid. "I suppose you didn’t hear about when I hooked up with one of the guys from my season. I won’t name names, but all of that was true. You didn’t notice me flirting with you the entire competition? I might have hated you earlier, but you were always nice to look at."

Dirk’s face is red. He admits, "I did notice, but I thought you were making fun of me."

Evan laughs. He states, "Dirk… I really like you. It took me a minute to get you, but I like you for who you are, and I don’t ask you to change that."

Dirk frowns. He asks, "You like it when I’m a jerk?" Evan nods. Dirk admits, "It’s really tiring trying to be something I’m not."

Evan assures, "I think we’re perfect for each other."

Dirk looks to the side. He asks, "What would you say if I told you I lied about not having a boyfriend at home?"

Evan shrugs. He admits, "I mean you’re preaching to the poster child of polyamory."

Dirk nods. He admits, "Only… That’s why I need this prize money… The truth is… He doesn’t treat me so good. He doesn’t even want me to call him my boyfriend, so technically..." Dirk looks to the side. "I don’t have any other options besides winning this prize money. I just want to buy a car, something big and loud, and just drive… Never looking back. I just don’t know how else to get away."

Evan asks, "Do you want me to off him for you? I do know a guy." Dirk shakes his head. Evan suggests, "Good, because I made that up. Let’s just run away together. I have nothing worth going back to, either… We can start a new life together."

Dirk looks into Evan’s eyes. "Let’s do it..."

"I’m not too skinny for you?" Evan asks with a smirk.

Dirk blushes. He glances away from Evan. "You’re a’ight."

Evan adds, as he shifts his gaze to past Dirk, "Before going any further… I kind of sort of… meant the whole falling bridge thing for you…"

"You were behind that?" Dirk asks, with eyebrows raised. Evan nods. "And all that other sabotage?" Evan nods again with a wince. "It’s kind of impressive, actually. I wish I had thought of that instead of my stupid nice guy act. I’m just not good at coming up with ideas like that…" He looks back at him. "Don’t try anything like that on me again." Evan shakes his head. "Where do we go from here? You be the brain, I’ll be the muscle. How do I win this for us?"

"I think I was approaching everything from the wrong angle," Evan admits. He looks at Dirk. "Are you ready to burn this competition to the ground?" Dirk furrows his brow and a wide grin comes across his face. He looks down and pulls something from his pocket. Evan’s eyes are wide. "How did you even think to take that?" Dirk is holding the lanyard holding Bigby’s credentials.

Dirk shrugs. He admits, "I just followed my instinct."

Evan sighs. "Damn, you’re so hot, right now."

"I know," Dirk responds. Dirk leans down toward Evan and the new couple kiss, again. Dirk asks, "So what do I do next?"

Evan smirks. He says, "You get voted out." Both of Dirk’s eyebrows rise.

### Chapter 14 - Candy Crushing It

Near The Dock of Shame, while the rain continues to fall, Esme, the contestant turned show host, announces with a forced smile, "Hello, and welcome to an all new Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst. I am your interim host while Chris McLean attends to important matters outside of the show. Everything is going… fine."

Someone can be heard yelling from the background, "At least tell me what I did, and why I’m being fired!" Esme winces as Nurse Bigby is dragged to The Boat of Losers. He continues to yell, "It has always been a dream of mine to ride this boat… but not like this!" Two interns toss the former resident nurse into The Boat of Losers before it departs.

Esme explains to the camera, "Uh… It is unfortunate, but we have evidence that Nurse Bigby had stolen some important documents related to the show. He was one of few people with access to them. Though we did not find any evidence on his person, which I took it upon myself to personally search, however when we searched his lodgings, we found some of the documents highlighting personal information about some of our contestants. We value the safety and privacy of our contestants, and have removed Nurse Bigby from the program."

Esme turns to another camera. "We have a lot of fun and games prepared for our players on tonight’s episode, which should hopefully keep them distracted from what’s going on behind the scenes…" Esme looks to the side. "After Dirk was eliminated on our previous episode, he agreed to stay on as an intern. The extra help should make the production side of things much easier." Esme smiles. "What’s in store for the remaining campers? Find out, now, on Total Drama: Worst of the Worst!"

Dirk is shown walking toward the medical tent. He looks behind him for a moment before taking a step forward. "Hey, buddy!" A voice states, while a lanky arm wraps around his shoulder.

Dirk steps back and raises his arm and leg in a defensive pose. Dirk lets his guard down as he states, "Oh, Zane. How’s it going, bud?"

Zane admits, "Pretty tame, honestly. I was expecting some more action when I signed up for this."

"The bridge falling on the guy wasn’t enough for you?" Dirk asks with a raised eyebrow.

Zane looks to the side. He admits, "Not that kind of action. Anyway, sorry to hear about your elimination, though the crew definitely was not expecting you to last this far." Zane points at himself with his thumb. "I, however, had much more faith in you. I wagered on you being voted out second."

"Thanks, man," Dirk responds as he rubs the back of his head. "I’m doing alright. Anyway, I should go check up on…"

"Evan?" Zane asks. "No need, my man."

"Huh?" Dirk asks. "They didn’t evacuate him, or…"

Zane shakes his head. He explains, "Apparently, he was asking specifically for Esme, so she’s going to babysit him, so we’re off the hook. I know how much you couldn’t stand him."

Dirk continues walking toward the medical tent and admits, "I really don’t m…"

Zane states, "Now that you’re one of us, we don’t have to worry about perceived favoritism, and we can hang out like old times." Zane puts an arm around Dirk, again, stopping him from moving. "I found a box that the costume, hair, and makeup crew left behind. The outfits look European, or something. I thought we could go hog wild."

"You want to do makeovers?" Dirk asks with wide eyes. "Isn’t that a little… fem?"

Zane admits, "Hey, I’m over that homophobia thing. I’m an ally, now. I watched a car commercial where these two dudes held hands, and I didn’t even hit the skip ad button until like twelve seconds in." Dirk’s eyes are wide. "Besides… There’s not much else to do out here, what with the rain and with the power going out. And hey, maybe the ladies will finally notice us, you know, this time not for being problematic." Zane holds up a spray can. "C’mon. I even found this spray on tan. It’ll be just like old times when we would hang out, before you got all wrapped up in that frat…" Dirk looks over at Zane for a moment.

"With all the rain, I haven’t been able to work on my tan." Dirk looks at the medical tent and then back at Zane. "Alright, man. You’re on."

Zane pumps a fist in the air. He exclaims, "Sweet! This is going to be epic."

Inside the medical tent, Esme sits next to Evan. She apologizes, "I’m sorry I haven’t visited sooner… You know… I’ve been super busy, what with practically running the show by myself."

Evan assures, "No, that’s a relief honestly." He smirks. "I assumed you stayed away because you only liked me when I was able bodied."

Esme laughs nervously. "Oh, no. It was nothing like that." She shifts her gaze to the side. "Dirk said you missed me?"

Evan responds, "Right." Evan smiles softly. "I forgot how beautiful you are in person."

Esme blushes slightly. She assures, with a clearing of her throat, "I’m not here for romance. That was the old me. I’m not about to fake my own drowning, or anything. I’m only here in a professional capacity."

"My apologies," Evan assures. He changes the subject. "What’s it like being the driving force behind production this season? That has to be a lot of responsibility."

Esme assures. "Oh, no. It’s been pretty… stress free. I get a lot of help from Zane… the last remaining intern. Oh, and we have Dirk on the crew, now, so things are sure to go much smoother." She forces a smile.

"Sure," Evan responds with a smirk. "Any trade secrets you’ve learned?"

"Not really," Esme admits. She looks to the side. "The island is a lot bigger than I realized. As a contestant, you don’t have access to a lot of areas. This island holds a lot of secrets."

Evan looks slightly more interested. He asks, "Like what?"

"I don’t know if I really should say," Esme insists. "Chris wanted the final episode to be more dramatic than ever, and to raise the stakes, so he decided to mix things up a little. The problem came with finding a secure enough area to…" Esme pauses. "Maybe I’m saying too much…"

Evan looks over at Esme with his brow furrowed. He asks, "What about the prize money? I’ve been wondering how you could afford to give away so much money this year."

Esme admits, "That’s part of the raised stakes. Chris seemed to think that the players would act more ruthless than usual if they thought they were playing for more money. I guess he was wrong.”

"Thought they were?" Evan asks, his eyes wide. "You mean… the money is fake?"

Esme shakes her head furiously. "No. It’s all here… I mean, there. This season has all sorts of sponsors and Chris really wanted to go all out. The prize money isn’t even half of what he has spent for himself this season."

Evan lowers his eyelids. He states, "He obviously didn’t put it into production value…"

Esme frowns. "I’m very sorry about what happened to you." She goes on, "I wish there was a way I could compensate you, but with all the waivers Chris has you all sign, my hands are tied…"

Evan assures, "It’s fine. I knew the risk I was running by agreeing to appear, again."

"I wish I knew what happened," Esme says. "I was certain our sets were all secure…"

"No need to stress about that." Evan places a hand on Esme’s leg. He states, "I’m just happy you finally came to see me." Esme blushes.

The following day, the contestants are gathered for the challenge inside the enclosed area housing the stage. Luke nudges Herman in the arm and states, "Golly. I can’t believe it’s already time for the challenge. It’s like nothing happened with us at the cabins."

"Verily," Herman responds. "Mayhap, it is because we hath such few competitors remaining?"

"I reckon that sounds about right," Luke agrees. "Maybe the ladies had more interesting things happening with them." Luke and Herman lean over to look at the women.

Grace assures, "Nope. It’s been pretty boring on our end, too."

Quimberly has her arms folded. She assures, "We’re just all relieved we don’t have to deal with Dirk, anymore."

Dirk and Zane step up dressed in white overalls, their skin tinted orange, and with green hair. Zane explains, "We hired Dirk on as an intern to help out with production."

Tamira gasps. She says, "Quimberly was wrong about something?"

Quimberly rolls her eyes. She explains, "I knew he was still here, I just wanted to see what it was like to speak in error. I guess it has less of an impact when you know the truth."

Grace asks, "What happened to Oofus and Doofus? Why are they orange?"

"Maybe that spray tan was spray paint?" Zane asks. "And maybe that hair dye was straight chlorine…" Zane looks to the side.

"It’s hard reading labels in the dark," Dirk admits.

"Did you bleach your eyebrows?" Tamira asks with a laugh. "You should really leave the glow ups to the professionals."

"What happened to your shirt?" Zane asks Dirk quietly.

"There was a shirt?" Dirk asks.

Esme steps out from behind the curtain dressed in a purple suit, and red top hat. She announces, "Hello and welcome to your latest challenge, sponsored by the wondiforous world of our sponsors, The Sprinkleverse!"

"Wondiforous?" Herman repeats. "Noweth she is makingeth up wordseth?"

"I guess The Sprinkleverse is venturing out of only selling sprinkles," a bored looking Quimberly adds.

"You will all be competing in a three part candy coated gauntlet," Esme explains.

"Gauntlet?" Tamira repeats. "Isn’t that like a glove, or something?"

Herman explains, "A gauntlet, dear lady, is like a tournament taking part in separate stages."

Esme nods. She explains, "After each round, one player will be eliminated and unable to compete in the final round, where invincibility will be up for grabs, my sweets."

Grace leans toward Tamira and asks, "Is it just me, or is she acting more chipper than normal?"

Esme suddenly appears between Tamira and Grace. Both women gasp. Esme explains, "I’ve decided that I’m going to take a more positive approach to my role here. No more wallowing over the rain, being abandoned by most of the staff, and the fact that almost all of the hot guys have been voted off already."

"Speaking of hot guys," Luke begins, with a raised hand. "What happened to Bigby? I thought it odd he wasn’t at the medical tent last night." Dirk looks down and to the side.

Esme clears her throat and states, "Let’s get back to the challenge at hand. The first round will be a merry go round, featuring products made by The Sprinkleverse." The contestants look over at a large carousel that looks like it’s made from candy.

"I want to ride the goose that lays the golden egg," Tamira adds. "I want to ride it now!"

Grace looks at Tamira as she blows a bubble with some gum. She asks, "What has gotten into you, and why are you wearing red, again? I thought you said it wasn’t your color."

Tamira explains, "We’ve gotten toward the end, and I’m not about to rewear an outfit. I only have a handful of little black dresses left to choose from."

Grace admits, "That’s fair." She blows another bubble.

The contestants are shown now mounting animals made of candy. Luke is atop a pink frosting covered giraffe, Tamira sits side saddle on a goose, Herman is riding a chocolate bunny, Quimberly rides a turtle made with chocolate and pecans, and Grace is sitting on a yellow marshmallow chick. Herman asks, "Wait. Art these edible?” He licks the chocolate covered biscuit holding up his chocolate bunny.

"Golly," Luke says. "Are they?" He sticks his tongue on the blue and white pole holding up his giraffe. "Is this… paper?"

Quimberly rolls her eyes. She explains, "It’s flavored sugar kept inside those paper tubes."

"Oh," Luke responds. "You’re ever so smart, miss."

"She knows," Grace replies with another eye roll. She adds, "This challenge seems kind of lame. Isn’t this a kiddie ride?"

"I love this ride," Herman admits.

"See what I mean?" Grace adds.

Esme explains, "This ride is a little more intense. Think of it like a rotating mechanical bull. With Dirk at the controls, it will get more intense as you progress. The first player to fall from their steed will not continue to the next round of the gauntlet." Esme motions. "Let’s begin." The ride slowly begins to move.

"This is it?" Luke asks. "I have a hundred year old tortoise back on the farm that moves faster ‘an this."

"Give it a minute," Esme assures, as she leans on a cane.

"What’s with the screen behind us?" Tamira asks.

Esme explains, "It was supposed to show some related candy themed imagery, but the interns that knew how to operate it are all gone."

Zane is lying beneath the large monitor. He shouts, "I think I almost have it good to go."

A slight tearing sound can be heard. Luke asks, "Did anyone hear something?"

Dirk pulls a lever from off stage, and it breaks off. He looks at the lever made from licorice and comments with his lower lip sticking out, "Uh oh. That can’t be good."

"Whooeey!" Luke shouts. "This ride is finally picking up!"

Tamira admits, "Maybe side saddle was a bad idea." She attempts to hold down her skirt as the merry go round spins more rapidly.

Herman’s cheeks flap back as he yells, "Zane! Stop this crazy thing!"

Zane smiles as he claps his hands and he stands up from under the monitor, that now depicts rotating lollipops and floating candy, as distorted carousel music plays. "That should do it. The audio is still pretty off, though." He pauses a moment. "Was somebody trying to get my attention just now?" His eyes widen as he looks on at the out of control merry go round, and dives off stage.

Luke’s jacket flaps as the wind picks up from the fast moving carousel. He asks, "Golly. It feels like there is a hurricane a’blowin’?"

"The monitor is making me nauseous," Grace states as she looks pale.

Quimberly comments, "You’re turning violet… Grace."

Luke looks up suddenly. His eyes widen as he realizes the paper pole holding his giraffe is tearing and blue powder spills out. He sticks his to tongue out and comments, "Raspberry? I ain’t never seen a blue raspberry in nature. That’s why we need to keep genetic modification away from our far…" Luke’s animal cracker themed mount flies loose from the carousel as he whips back.

As he crashes, several players and Dirk call out, "Luke!" Zane helps Dirk place the lever back into the controls and is able to slow down the carousel.

Dirk runs over to Luke and lifts up his head. Luke groggily states, "Momma. I think the twister done took Bessie." His head falls back.

After the others leave the carousel, they stand around a recovered Luke. He assures, "I’m fine. I’m fine. Quit making such a fuss."

Herman assures, "We all art concerned about your safety."

Luke insists, "I been through worse, I reckon…" He pauses. "Is the room still spinning for all of y’all, too?" He stumbles while trying to stand in place.

Esme announces, "As a result of the first challenge, Luke has been eliminated from the tournament and has no shot at invincibility."

"Shucks," Luke laments.

Esme explains, "Next we have a food eating challenge."

Herman raises his arm. He asks, "Will thine challenge involve gross food? I find that I hath a most sensitive palette except for sweets."

Esme shakes her head. She clarifies, "All of the food for the second round was provided by The Sprinkleverse. Whoever consumes the least of these sweet treats will be unable to compete in the final round of the tournament for invincibility." Dirk pushes out a cart full of sugary sweets.

Tamira is next to raise her hand. She asks, "Is anything on there under six thousand calories?"

Esme answers, "Well, no, but…"

"I forfeit," Tamira quickly confirms. "Bikini season is not over." Dirk turns around and pushes the cart off stage.

Esme blinks. She explains, "That leaves… Quimberly, Grace, and Herman for our final round." Herman excitedly claps his hands together. Esme explains, "On stage, you’ll see the decorations provided for today’s challenge." Esme holds out her hand to gesture at the oversized candy themed decorations. "You will have five minutes to find a hidden golden ticket on stage. At the end of the time, whoever has the golden ticket in their possession will earn invincibility for the episode, and cannot be voted out of the game. Understood?” The remaining contestants nod. "Then your time starts now!"

Grace and Herman rush around the stage to look under and in different decorations. Herman places his hand inside what appears to be a mushroom. He pulls his hands out only to discover that the mushroom is made from marshmallow fluff. "Gadzooks!" He cries out. "This is my favorite!" He licks his hands, and then sticks his face inside the mushroom as he devours the sweet prop.

Grace lifts a candy rock only to see nothing under it or inside. Grace tosses it aside. She looks over at Quimberly who has not moved from when the time started. Grace raises an eyebrow and says to herself, "What is that girl up to?" Grace turns to search through more props, but keeps an eye on Quimberly.

Esme announces, "Players! You are at the one minute mark! If no one finds the golden ticket, no one earns invincibility!"

Grace continues to search the props, while Herman continues to consume the sugary confection. Quimberly casually walks across the stage toward the broken giraffe animal cracker Luke was riding on. She reaches inside the animal cracker’s neck and pulls out the golden ticket.

"Well, I’ll be gosh darned," Luke comments from the audience with Tamira.

"Not so fast," Grace states. She smirks as she takes hold of the other side of the golden ticket. "I had my eye on you. How could you have possibly known the ticket was in here?"

Quimberly explains, "It seemed like the least obvious place to look…" Esme smiles. "To a simple mind." Esme frowns.

Grace assures, "Well, I’m not letting go. I can tell you that much."

Quimberly replies, "You lost an earring."

Grace places a hand over her ear. She blinks. "Wait. I wasn’t…" Quimberly casually walks away with the golden ticket.

Esme looks at her watch. "Aaaand… time!" The host announces. She walks over to Quimberly. "And with that Quimberly earned invincib… Wait." Esme looks around Quimberly. "Where did the ticket go?" Quimberly casually looks at her fingernails. Esme looks down at a groaning Herman face down with chocolate and marshmallow cream covering his face.

Herman groans, "So… much… sugar…" He falls face forward.

Esme’s eyes widen. "I don’t believe it! Herman has the golden ticket in his back pocket! Herman wins invincibility!"

"What?!" Grace shouts. "I saw Quimberly with it, like half a second ago. That can’t be right. I call tomfoolery."

Esme assures with a nod. "It is right. See?" She points to the golden ticket in Herman’s pocket. Luke and Tamira join the others on stage. Quimberly sashays to the other side of the stage.

Grace looks over her shoulder at Quimberly and admits quietly to Tamira, "Something fishy is happening. I don’t like it."

Tamira responds, "Who do you propose we target?"

On their way back to their cabin, Luke tells Herman, "Hey, pard. You go on ahead. I need to make a quick pit stop at the outhou… I mean, confessional." Herman nods.

Luke rushes off into the rain as Herman enters their shared cabin. Herman steps in after stomping the mud off his shoes. Herman looks back and admits to himself, "Curious how we all unintentionally referenced a classic film with our outfits and I just now realized it…" Herman looks down. He drops down to his knees and shouts, "I’m dressed like the remake! Nooooo!" He looks down and notices something under his bed. "What, pray tell, art thou?" Herman retrieves a piece of paper. His eyes become wide as he looks at it.

At the campfire ceremony, Esme announces, "Herman, you earned the first marshmallow." She holds it up as his eyes widen and his cheeks puff out.

Herman mutters, "Please, pardon thou." He runs to the bushes and loud vomiting noises are audible.Esme tosses the marshmallow toward his seat.

Esme blinks. "Next we have a marshmallow for Tamira and… Grace." Esme tosses the marshmallows to the women. "That leaves one marshmallow." Two marshmallows are clearly visible on the tray. Esme tosses one aside quickly. Herman rejoins the others. "The last marshmallow goes to…"

"Quimberly." Quimberly catches her marshmallow. "That means… Sorry, Luke… But it’s time for you to go."

Luke stands up and says, "Golly. I wasn’t expecting that."

"We weren’t planning on voting for you, but someone stumbled across this," Tamira says as she gestures toward Herman.

Herman holds up a piece of paper, with a frown on his face. "Sorry, Luke."

Esme’s eyes are wide. She asks, "Where did you get that?"

Herman responds, "I found it under my bed." Esme’s brow is furrowed.

Luke takes the piece of paper from Herman and reads it to himself. "Well, I’ll be…" He looks up. "Y’all found out my big secret, huh?" The others nod. He laughs heartily. "I reckon it was only a matter of time... I’d be lying if I didn’t say this whole adventure wasn’t a hoot and a half. Thanks for sharing it with me." Everyone nods and stands up to hug Luke goodbye.

Luke makes his way to The Boat of Losers where he sits, and looks down at the piece of paper. It reads at top ‘Luke’s four star secret. After a lengthy lawsuit involving medical malpractice, Luke and his family are currently multimillionaires.’ He frowns for a moment, but then smiles wide. "That Hedda lass done me in, after all, I guess. This sure was a wild ride. Getting past first out sure was a lot diff’rent."

Esme announces as she faces he camera, "With that, the last of the hunks is out of the competition. We are down to the last few episodes. What surprises await as we wind down the competition? Find out next time on Total Drama: Worst of the Worst!"

### Chapter 15 - Now That’s What You Call Music?

Esme, the hostess with burgundy hair, speaks into a walkie talkie. She asks, "Still no word from Chris?"

The voice from the other side responds, "No… We aren’t able to get any communication with anyone from the main land. I think logically the radio towers and cell towers are down due to the storm."

Esme frowns. She looks up at the camera. She forces a smile and assures, "Oh. I didn’t see you there." She assures, "Everything is going just fine on the island. I’m sure the storm will let up any moment now." A loud crack of thunder is heard as Esme winces, and the surrounding rain gets heavier and louder. Esme begins speaking up in order to compete with the sound of the rain. "Last time, our contestants competed in a candy themed challenge…" She looks down at her clipboard. The soggy piece of paper on it splits apart and falls to the ground. Esme sighs. "I can’t quite recall who won the challenge what with the stress of hosting a competition that became derailed weeks ago…" Esme blinks at the camera. She forces a smile. "I do remember that we lost Luke, the last of the men…" Esme pauses for a moment. "Unless you count Herman…" Esme forces another smile. "On tonight’s episode, we refuse to let the weather, and lack of staffing effect the grand challenge we have in store. We have fifteen guest stars back and ready to…" Esme looks off camera. "We had to cancel the guest stars? The coast guard says it’s not safe for anyone to travel here by boat?" Esme shakes her head and smiles. "We still have a lot to present to you. Our staff has been constructing the most elaborate challenge in the show’s history. An above ground spectacle that people will talk about for…" Esme’s smile fades as she looks off camera. She mouths ‘Seriously?’ Esme holds her head down for a moment. She looks up. "Well… We’ll see what we can scrape up." Esme lets out a deep sigh.

Herman looks out the window of his cabin with a frown, as the rain hits against it. He looks unenthused as he picks up his rain poncho from a hook in order to head outside. As he pulls on the hook, the board holding the hooks falls from the wall and lands on the floor front side down. Herman’s eyes are wide as he bends down and pulls on the board, the hooks are caught between the floorboards as he struggles to pull on the board. Eventually, it lets loose, scrapes against his cheek, and launches across the room and breaks through the window. Herman’s face drops, as the wind blows the room’s curtain inward, and rain starts pouring into the room. Herman puts a hand over his face. Herman looks behind him as his door swings open, and he is startled. He asks, "Quimberly? What art thou doing here?"

"I heard a crashing noise," Quimberly responds. "Are you hurt?"

Herman asks, "Hurt? No." He places a hand on his cheek. "’Tis but a flesh wound. I just accidentally broke yonder window.” Herman points at it and continues, “I think the rain doth hath me on edge, or mayhap the pressure of the competition." Herman looks to the side.

Quimberly assures, "You have nothing to worry about."

"Eh wot?" Herman asks. "What doth thou mean?"

Quimberly looks away from Herman. She says, "Uh… I meant about the window. It’s not a big deal… But I happen to be an expert at window repair, I picked it up quite naturally when I funded and repaired that school for rehabilitated street trash. Anyway… Enough about me and my many accomplishments… I stumbled across a spare window by the crew’s headquarters when I was freeing a stray kitten that got tied up by a broken shoestring."

Herman looks at Quimberly and responds, "Wowzer. Thou’st really is amazing."

Quimberly blushes slightly and looks away. She assures, "Anyone would have done it."

Herman shakes his head. He insists, "No, thine lady protests too much. Thou’st is like a heroine from a young adult fiction story."

"I get that a lot. Uh… Were you heading out?" Quimberly asks as she looks at Herman’s poncho.

Herman looks down. He admits, "Oh, right. Thou is most observant." Quimberly blushes a little more. "I meant to head to the confessional, but alas…

"You hate the rain," Quimberly responds matter of factly.

"Verily," Herman responds. "How doest thou know?"

"I barely see you leave your cabin," Quimberly responds. Herman’s eyes widen. "I mean… your poncho barely has any water damage on it."

Herman looks down at his poncho. He replies, "Yay. I suppose thou is spot on, once more."

"I mean… you obviously take great care of your clothes, with how much care you put into sewing all of your them."

Herman raises an eyebrow slightly as he asks, "How doest thou know I tailor my own clothes?"

Quimberly admits, "You have a signature cross stitch. I noticed it at the design challenge."

Herman blinks. He admits, "Yay… I guess I do. I… Uh…" He looks at the window. "I must make haste to clean that up."

"No," Quimberly insists. "Leave it to me. I don’t want you to hurt yourself." Quimberly walks toward the broken glass. She kneels down and reaches down, only for Herman to put his hand on her shoulder. Quimberly looks back.

Herman holds up his arm revealing that he is wearing elaborate golden gauntlets. "Milady, I hath made these from premium foam core, custom made to fit my forearms. I insist that thou allows me to clean up this mess." Quimberly nods slightly. "Why don’t thou find that yonder window? I’ll clean this up, and then head to the confessional. I’ll meet back up with thou here." Quimberly nods before departing. Herman looks back at her as she exits with a furrowed brow.

In confessional, Herman admits, "I shalt not be so bold to flatter myself, but Quimberly even acknowledging me seems odd, let alone…" Herman looks to the side of the confessional.

Herman exits the confessional and lifts a cloth sack filled with the broken glass. He approaches a garbage can near the medical tent and lifts the lid. He is about to drop in his sack of garbage before looking down into the trash can. "Who art thou?" He raises an eyebrow as he reaches inside and pulls a piece of paper from inside and tucks it inside his poncho, before tossing in his trash.

Herman returns to his cabin to see that his window is already repaired, and Quimberly is gone. He scratches his head. He removes his poncho and places it on the hook.

In the medical tent, Zane steps out of Evan’s room, his cheeks bright red. Dirk walks out soon after him. Dirk apologizes, "Sorry, man. I guess the cats out of the bag about me and Evan, huh? What with you walking in on us making out."

Zane waves his hands to and fro and assures, "No, no, man. It’s fine. I just had no idea he was… Anyway, we’re cool. I should have… Found something to knock on."

Dirk asks, "You’re really cool with this? From what I remember, you were…"

Zane insists, "I admit that it was a surprise, and all, but you know… I’m happy for you."

"You are?" Dirk asks, looking dumbfounded.

Zane replies, "Hey, if you’re happy, it’s all good. It was a bit of a shock, and all, but I guess I should have seen it coming."

"Why’s that?" Dirk asks, with a raised eyebrow.

Zane shrugs and admits, "You can only edit footage of someone gawking at Anders so much before you start putting the pieces together."

Dirk puts a hand on the back of his head, and admits, "I guess I’m guilty as charged."

Zane turns around, “I’ll let you get back to Evan. Give him my best."

"Yeah," Dirk responds. He stops for a moment. He asks, "Hey, about me and Evan, could you maybe… not…"

Zane smirks and assures, "Oh. You’re relationship is on the DL, huh?" He laughs. "You’re secret is safe with me. By the way, we need you as a judge in tomorrow’s challenge. Something Esme slapped together, I don’t know all the details, yet."

Dirk nods. He assures, "I’m open to whatever."

Zane places a hand on Dirk’s shoulder. "I’m glad to have you on the same team…" Zane winces. "I, of course, mean the production side of things."

Dirk laughs. "I knew what you meant."

The following morning, Tamira looks at her dresses hanging in her cabin’s wardrobe. She thoughtfully places a hand under her chin. Quimberly asks, "What are you deciding? Whether to wear the little black dress, the little black dress, or the little black dress?"

Tamira narrows her eyes and glances to the side. She responds, "Yes. Why are you…"

"Where did Grace go?" Quimberly asks.

Tamira explains, "It was her turn to grab breakfast and bring it back for us. I can go get her…"

Quimberly shakes her head and rushes to her bag. "No, no. I’ve been waiting for a chance to get you alone."

Tamira’s eyes widen. She assures, "I’m flattered." Tamira holds up her ring finger. "But I’m happily…"

Quimberly turns around and holds something behind her back. She replies, "I have something important to tell you. But first… I need your full assurance that I can trust you with sensitive information."

Tamira raises an eyebrow, and asks, "This is, like, the first time you’ve spoken to me…"

"Yes," Quimberly replies.

Tamira looks to the side. She quickly looks back at Quimberly and assures with a smile, "Of course, I mean, you’re you."

Quimberly looks at her fingernails and responds, "Some days I don’t believe it myself." She turns her attention back to Tamira with a wide smile. "This is going to sound crazy, but we have a chance to change the course of history. I need your help. Are you in?"

"What are you getting at?" Tamira asks with a concerned expression. "You want to help you win the competition?"

Quimberly laughs and shakes her head. "I’m not winning this competition."

"You aren’t?" Tamira asks, her eyes wide. "I’ve honestly almost been resigning myself to losing to you."

Quimberly frowns. She assures, "If I wanted to win this game, I would just asked everyone to forfeit in my behalf." Tamira nods. "No. My purpose here is something else… Something far more important. But why am I explaining it when I can just show you." Quimberly holds up an ancient looking piece of pottery. "I admit there’s a missing piece. I found that, too, but haven’t finished restoring it, yet… What do you think? It all makes sense now, doesn’t it?"

"What is that?" Tamira responds, more confused than before.

Quimberly replies, "Oh, I forget that the import of ancient Mediterranean artifacts isn’t common knowledge these days." Quimberly holds a hand under her chin. The mostly black artifact depicts a purple haired man being showered with gold coins. "It’s clearly an artistic rendering of Herman…"

"Herman?" Tamira repeats. She looks to the side. "Uh. I’m not sure I see the resemblance."

Quimberly says, "I guess I overestimated your eye for the obvious." Quimberly points at the vase. "According to this pottery, Herman is clearly winning this competition."

Tamira replies, "Fine. I admit it looks like him, but how do we know this has anything to do with this show? I mean, it could simply mean that he will come into some money some other way, like the lottery, or a personal injury settlement, am I right?" Quimberly narrows her eyes, as she slowly turns the pottery toward Tamira. Tamira’s eyes widen as a depiction of a trophy on the vase is revealed at the new angle, the letters ‘TDWotW’ are clearly legible on it. "I can’t believe it."

Quimberly assures, "I didn’t believe it at first, either, but everything started to fall into place. Imagine my surprise when I arrived and Herman wasn’t even here. I’m glad I decided to stay, because I believe it’s my role to help and protect him in this competition." Quimberly bows her head down slightly. She lifts it back up and asks, "And so is yours."

"I… but… what?" Tamira asks.

Quimberly nods and explains, "it’s true. I admit that I haven’t had to do much, given the total lack of competition this season had to offer, but now we’re getting down to the wire. I need you to join me and Herman in voting out Grace." Quimberly turns the vase more to reveal a depiction of a crowd of children smiling and eating sandwiches. Quimberly continues to explain, "Whatever Herman does with his winnings apparently does a lot of people a lot of good. He needs to win."

"Does he know about this?" Tamira asks.

Quimberly responds, "No. He doesn’t need to know. In fact, it’s probably best that he doesn’t. He’s so humble and benevolent that he likely would reject any help."

"Or choke under the pressure," Tamira states under her breath as she glares to the side.

"What was that?" Quimberly asks with a raised eyebrow.

"Nothing…" Tamira assures rapidly with a fake smile. She looks thoughtful for a moment. "Are we sure this isn’t all some sort of coincidence?" Tamira asks.

"No. This is for real." Quimberly shakes her head. She insists, "Don’t you see? We have an opportunity to fulfill prophecy. Isn’t that exciting?"

Tamira winces and assures, "Suuuure."

Quimberly responds, "I can count you in, right? You obviously want to be on the right side of history." Tamira blinks. She forces a smile.

At the challenge, again at the stage set, the remaining contestants are gathered. Tamira looks over at Quimberly and she leans toward Grace. She whispers, "You will never guess what happened earlier. I’ll have to fill you in when we have a chance to be alone." Grace looks at Tamira with a raised eyebrow. "Trust me." Grace then nods.

Esme announces, "We have an all new, all exciting challenge for you."

Dirk and Zane stand behind the woman. Dirk asks, "I thought this was just leftovers from the talent show." Esme glares back at Dirk and Zane, and Zane elbows Dirk in the arm. Zane then rubs his elbow as Dirk looks at him with surprise.

"You know what they say," Esme starts, "Music makes the people come together. That’s right, each of you will choose your instruments of choice and perform for the judges. The contestant with the best score will earn invincibility." Herman raises his hand. Esme states, "And no Herman. You may not play the ocarina, again." Herman frowns as he lowers his arm. Quimberly looks at Herman, and then glares at Esme. Esme assures, "Um. But I’m sure you’ll find something else that suits you."

Dirk walks up and tosses an accordion on the top of the pile of instruments. He explains, "Found another one." He walks away.

Esme nods. "We’ll let you make your musical selections, and then we’ll begin with the show."

The players begin digging through the pile of instruments and related items. "This is pretty unceremonious," Grace states as she holds up a cowbell with two fingers. "Less cowbell." She tosses it behind her.

Tamira whispers, "If we play this right, it won’t matter who wins invincibility."

Grace furrows her brow. "What are you hinting at?"

Quimberly walks past the women from behind. Tamira looks back. She loudly says, "Girl. This challenge is so wild, am I right? What are you picking?" She watches as Quimberly steps away. She winks at Grace. "Later."

Esme steps in front of the closed curtain. She clasps her hands together and says, "On to our first performance. The ukulele musings of… Grace!"

Zane politely claps, as Dirk is fast asleep in the chair next to him. He nudges Dirk with his elbow. Dirk wakes up and looks around confused. He looks at Grace. "What’s with the guitar for babies?"

"That’s a ukulele, man," Zane explains.

"A ukie…" Dirk tries to repeat. "Whatever. It looks lame."

"Didn’t you test all the instruments after everybody selected them?" Zane asks.

Dirk looks to the side. He asks, "Would you be mad if I said I forgot?"

Zane slaps his own face with his palm. Zane scolds, "Dirk, you had one job."

"Sorry, I was up late with… you know who…" Dirk reveals.

Zane replies, "Oh, yeah, man. Say no more." Zane winks and nudges Dirk with his elbow. Dirk blinks.

Grace is seated on a stool. She begins strumming on the ukulele, the sound is obviously distorted. Grace frowns. She states as she shakes the ukulele, "Is there something inside here? I swear if it’s a rodent, I am not afraid to raise hell and risk being stereotyped, again."

Esme assures, "It should be fine, uh… Right Dirk?" Dirk shrugs and winces. Esme looks back on stage. "Sorry, Grace. I guess we have to make due with what we have…" She glares aside. She mutters, "Like the rest of this show."

Grace continues shaking the ukulele until a lit firework falls from inside the ukulele and gets caught in the strings. Grace eyes widen as she exclaims, "Aw, nah! We are not playing this whole dangerous game thing." Grace tosses up the ukulele and she dives to the ground. The ukulele explodes as a cascade of purples and blues float down to the stage. Several others ‘ooh’ and ‘aah’. Grace glares at them and asks, "Are you kidding me?"

Esme places a hand on her forehead. Esme assures, "My apologies in behalf of the staff for that little… mishap, Grace. We’ll be sure to inspect the instruments here on out." She glares at Dirk, who whistles innocently. "Feel free to select another option and perform, again."

"No way," Grace insists as she shakes her head. "I’m not about to risk it with how many ‘mishaps’ this season has seen. Lit fireworks don’t just randomly happen...

Esme grimaces. The hostess explains, "If you refuse to choose a new instrument, we will need to judge your performance then, as we saw it."

"Wait…" Grace begins.

Esme holds up a zero paddle, Zane holds up a paddle with a one on it, and Dirk holds up a paddle with a zero on it. "Grace has the score to beat with one out of… thirty."

"For all the…" Grace begins, her eyes glaring to the side.

Esme stands up and introduces, "Next we have the musical stylings of Tamira."

The curtain raises and Tamira stands before a table full of wine glasses filled to various extents. Tamira elegantly clasps her hands together before cracking her knuckles. Tamira rubs her fingers on top of the glasses as they make a sort of ringing sound.

Herman leans in toward Quimberly behind stage and asks, "Did thou know she could do that? It is most impressive." Quimberly frowns as she looks on.

Esme announces, "With a score of twenty-two…" Esme and Zane glare at Dirk.

"What? I thought it was a waste of good booze," Dirk gruffly insists, as he drinks from one of the glasses.

Esme continues, "Tamira is the new leader with judge’s points."

Tamira steps backstage as Herman leaves to prepare for his turn. Quimberly has her arms folded as she asks, "What’s with the effort? I thought we agreed that we would let Herman win this challenge."

Tamira winces. She insists, "I didn’t want to make it too obvs that I’m working with you. Besides… I admit that I’m, like, new to this whole prophecy thing, but isn’t it going to happen no matter what we do?"

Quimberly admits, "I suppose you make a fair point." Tamira smiles.

On the main stage, Esme begins, "Let’s get the crowd going for…" Esme looks down at her clipboard. "DJ Quadro4ce."

A DJ’s turntable is on stage. Herman slowly rises from behind the table. He raises his arms to the air and asks, "Art thine ready to octo-rock?!"

Dirk and Zane look at each other. They look back at Herman. Zane replies, "Yeah… I mean, I guess?"

Herman sets a record on the turntable and holds a hand to his headphones as he begins dancing in place to 90’s techno music. Herman raises his free hand in the air.

"Is that…" Zane begins, "Techno? I haven’t heard this since grade school, and even then it wasn’t on purpose."

Herman puts on another record as he bobs his head. Esme asks, "Bless his heart, but is this really considered a talent?" Zane shrugs.

Herman smiles after his set and he has both arms raised to the air as he profusely sweats.

Esme stands up and says, "Thank you, Herman…" Herman frowns. "I mean…" Esme looks down at her clipboard, again. "DJ Quadro4ce. Now for your scores." Esme holds up a paddle with a three on it. Dirk holds up a paddle with a nine on it. Zane holds up a paddle with a two on it. Zane and Esme glare at Dirk.

Dirk responds, "What? It reminds me of the times us boys went out to the club on retro night. Me and the guys would practically fill up the joint, until I’d pass out, and they’d take turns writing obscenities on my face." Dirk sighs. "Or what I like to call them, the good old days."

Esme and Zane stare at Dirk for a few moments. Esme turns her attention back to Herman. Esme announces, "Herman scored fourteen points. Sorry Herman, but you have no shot at invincibility. Tamira still leads with twenty-two points. Lastly, but not leastly… Quimberly with her one man… One person band." Esme claps before stepping off the stage as she gestures toward Quimberly.

As the curtain raises, Quimberly looks offstage to see Herman remove his headphones from his ears. He sneezes, and lets go of the headphones and they clamp down on the back of his head and nose. He looks startled and proceeds to fall to the floor. Quimberly looks on and then frowns. She turns to the judges, as Esme and Zane look at her with anticipation. An uninterested Dirk has a finger in his ear. Quimberly picks up a set of bagpipes and begins playing. Almost instantly, a spontaneous tear rolls down Zane’s cheek.

After her performance, Quimberly stands up from the stool, a wake of instruments beside her. Zane and Esme have tears streaming down their face as they applaud. Zane elbows Dirk, who reluctantly stands and slow caps. Esme announces, "Ten!" She holds up her paddle. Zane holds up a ten paddle. Dirk holds up a zero paddle. Esme and Zane look at him with furrowed brows. Dirk smirks and holds a one paddle in front of the zero. Esme gives a sigh of relief. "It’s tens across the board. With a perfect thirty, the winner of the challenge is… Quimberly!" Esme and Zane continue to applaud.

"We’re the real winners, to have witnessed history in the making," Zane adds.

Esme nods. "I’ve never considered playing a cello with a violin instead of a bow." The other contestants step on stage. "Quimberly is safe, but one of the rest of you will be voted out tonight."

Herman smiles and says, "Twas an orchestral arrangement for the goddesses."

"Who knew you could play all those instruments?" Grace adds.

Quimberly shrugs and responds, "There’s a first time for everything."

Grace’s eyes widen. "That was your… first time?!"

"What, like it’s hard?" Quimberly asks as she looks at her nails. "I need to check something back at the cabin." Herman walks away, as well.

Grace asks Tamira, "What was that about?"

Tamira leans forward to make sure Quimberly is gone. She grabs Grace by the shoulders. "You will never believe it. You remember how Quimberly acts weird around Herman?"

"How could I forget? Don’t tell me she has a crush on him," Grace requests. She places a hand on her stomach. "I can barely say it without losing my lunch."

"Even weirder," Tamira insists. Grace’s eyes get wide. Tamira shakes Grace by the shoulders. "She says Herman is going to win this competition! She says it’s a prophecy! Can you believe it?!" Tamira laughs.

"You’re kidding," Grace replies, her eyes still wide.

"No!" Tamira responds as she tries to hold back laughter.

Grace laughs. She states, "Herman? What like he’s ‘the chosen one’, now?"

"Maybe like the one chosen… last for team sports," Tamira adds. "And get this. He has no idea!" She wipes a tear from her eye as Grace continues to laugh. "I haven’t cried this much since… Quimberly’s musical performance."

"I haven’t laughed this hard since Libby’s guest appearance," Grace comments. "So what do we do?"

Tamira explains, "I told Quimberly I’m voting for you."

"You what?" Grace responds in surprise.

Tamira goes on, "If she asks, say you’re voting me. It’s perfect. If we can get Herman to vote for me, and Quimberly to vote for you, we have, like, a majority."

"That’s smart, actually," Grace replies. "I hope it works."

"It will," Tamira assures. "We just have to lay it on thicker than your eye shadow." Grace glares at Tamira.

Grace states, "You better be right. Anyway, we should hurry back to the cabin."

Tamira replies, "Shoot. I think I set my wedding ring down by the wine glasses. I’ll catch up with you soon." Grace nods as she leaves the stage.

Later, at the campfire ceremony, Esme tosses a marshmallow to Quimberly. She announces, "We have three of you left, but I’m going to rip off the bandage. The last marshmallows go to." Tamira frowns as she looks at Grace and places a hand over her heart. Quimberly looks away for a moment, and Tamira winks at Grace. Grace forces a smile, as Herman breathes into a paper bag.

"Grace and… Herman," Esme announces. She tosses the last two marshmallows to the pair.

Tamira looks stunned. She raises her sunglasses and asks, "There must be some kind of mistake. I was totes in the best position in the game!"

Quimberly has her arms folded. "I know about your plan to backstab Herman."

"Me?" Herman asks, his eyes show his surprise.

Tamira looks at Grace. "It wasn’t me," Grace assures.

"Then how did you find out?" Tamira asks.

Quimberly assures, "You don’t deserve the satisfaction of an explanation, but I’ll show you." Quimberly holds up the vase with Herman’s likeness on it.

"What art that?" Herman asks with a raised eyebrow.

"Don’t concern yourself with it, Herman." Herman shrugs and looks in the other direction. Quimberly holds up the missing piece of the vase and places it next to the rest of the vase. Tamira puts her hands over her mouth as she gasps. The piece bares an image of woman with short brown hair and a short black dress holding a knife up behind Herman’s back. "Is that supposed to be me? My nose is not that big."

"Sorry, Tamira," Esme says. "You will need to leave the island."

Tamira picks up her bags. She assures, "I really needed this money." Grace looks down.

Quimberly responds, "Apparently you’re not the only one." She looks at Grace with a smirk.

"Verily." Herman nods. "Thine truly needs a new codpiece for my next LARP." Grace winces.

Tamira looks confused as she looks at Quimberly and then at Grace. A disappointed looking Tamira then makes her way to The Boat of Losers before letting out a deep sigh.

Grace continues to hold her head down. Quimberly holds out an envelope. "Here. You held up your end of the bargain. I’ll give you back your information."

Grace gruffly replies, "Gee… Thanks." She looks to the side as she places the envelope into her raincoat.

Esme is shown in front of the camera. She states, "With that, another episode is in the books. It’s all just so exciting as we near the end. Be sure to tune in next time when our final two will be decided on an all new Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst!"

### Chapter 16 - A Wink to the Past

Esme, the burgundy haired show host, smiles as she addresses the camera. She is inside her crew headquarters as the torrential downpour of rain can be seen and heard behind her through a window. She introduces, "Welcome to an all new Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst! On our previous episode, we saw our final few contestants show off their musical prowess. A surprise to no one, I guess, Quimberly earned invincibility. We had to say goodbye to Tamira, which did far better than we all expected… We’re nearing the end and have a surprising twist in store for our final three contestants." Esme holds her hands together. "I feel like we’re finally getting the kinks out and everything is finally coming together. Mark my words, I think things are going to go super smoothly from here on out on Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst." Esme lingers awkwardly as she smiles at the camera before walking towards it in order to turn it off herself.

Grace is shown in confessional with her arms folded. She glares to the side. "I was put in a tough spot, tonight. Do I vote out my closest friend out here, or risk a tie when I’m vulnerable?" Grace assures, "I’m sure Tamira would do the same thing in my situation. And maybe I wouldn’t have if Quimberly didn’t…" Grace stops herself. "Never mind." She pauses for a moment. "Is anyone else concerned about the lit firecracker in my ukulele, or…"

Herman is next in confessional. He assures, "Wowzer. Final three, I hath ne’er thought I would make it here." He briefly darts his eyes aside. "Well… especially since I tweren’t originally on the season. But it doth appears that the stars hath bequeathed events in my favor, despite my having to do nary a thing…" Herman smiles awkwardly. "I art a natural at this, mayhap."

Grace and Quimberly are shown in their cabin. Grace assures, "Well, you got what you wanted out of me. Our one night alliance is over.” Grace holds up a piece of paper.

Quimberly nonchalantly states, "I don’t know why you needed a written contract. I’m the most trustworthy."

Grace responds, "Whatever. I’m just glad I don’t have to work with you, anymore." Grace tears up their contract. "My lawyer, old friend, and fairy godsister always encouraged me to make a contract, and to always read the fine print."

Quimberly shrugs. "It doesn’t matter, in the end. Herman and I have the numbers, now, so it’s all but history." She looks at her fingernails. "But third place is nothing to be ashamed of." She holds back a laugh. "At least that’s what I’ve heard."

Grace frowns. She assures, "If life has taught me anything, it’s that anything can happen." Grace looks aside.

"Tell that to my pottery," Quimberly insists as she holds up her ancient artwork before placing it securely inside her bag. Grace rolls her eyes.

Grace is shown in confessional, again. She has her arms folded. She explains, "I guess it doesn’t matter anymore, since people will figure it out once this is airing, so I might as well tell the truth. The reason I agreed to vote with Quimberly was because she stumbled across my secret from Hedda… I don’t know where she found it." Grace sighs. "The truth is… At home, my kid sister isn’t doing the best right now. I’m currently the legal guardian of her two kids until she is in a better place. I’ve had to take on an extra job just to make ends meet." Grace looks to the side. "This isn’t what I would have chosen for myself, I never wanted kids… But I’ve put my dreams of being an actress on hold to earn a stable income… What I’m doing is more important, I don’t doubt that, but that’s why I’m competing. This money would change my life. I didn’t want the others to hear my secret, because they would have felt I was trying to garner sympathy to get to the end. Or worse, they would have kept me around out of pity." Grace shakes her head. "I earned my spot here, and I refuse to give up now that I’ve made it to this point."

Grace puts up the hood of her raincoat before she exits the confessional. Herman steps up. He bows his head slightly and says, "Milady."

"Oh… Herman…" Grace states. "Sorry, I didn’t know you were waiting out here."

Herman explains, "There was nary a rush, milady. I am only here to retrieve me petticoat. The accuracy of my ensemble wert in shambles without it." Grace stares at a Herman until his face turns red. He looks aside. "Forgive me, milady. I’m not used to getting looked upon."

Grace states, "Sorry. I just can’t get over that you’re supposed to win this thing."

"Beg pardon?" Herman asks as he blinks. "What art thou hinting at? I assure there is no riggory in my favor."

"You mean you don’t know?" Grace asks, looking surprised.

Herman shakes his head. He assures, "I believe thou art mistaken."

Grace blinks she nods slowly. "Yeah. You’re right. Anyway… I’ll be leaving now…" Herman nods as he bows his head, again.

Dirk and Esme walk together through the mud in their rain gear. Dirk assures, "Where are we headed? This is pretty far out."

Esme explains, "When Herman agreed to be on the show, his one condition was that we store some of the extra costumes he provided for the treasure hunt challenge in a safe place until we had an opportunity to showcase them. Now, with it just being you, me, and Zane left on the island due to ‘unsafe conditions’, we need them. I would have made one of those strapping interns, or that hulking male nurse help me, but now you’re the best we got to transfer this chest." Dirk stays quiet and looks to the side. "Here we are."

"What is this place?" Dirk asks as he looks around an area with a large door emerging from the ground that looks like the door to a vault, complete with a turnstile.

Esme shrugs. "We found it during production. At first Chris had me stay here. He said something about a request from the male interns, or some such thing." Esme laughs awkwardly. "Such a kidder." Dirk looks at Esme with wide eyes. "Anyway, I’ll have you do the honors, giving you’re massive rhinoceros arms."

Dirk looks disconcerted as he replies, "Uh… Thanks." Dirk turns the turnstile with ease before pulling it open. He leans over the side and states, "It sure is dark down there. You sure this is safe?"

Esme insists, "Of course! I brought my flashlight with me." Esme holds up a flashlight. She presses the button with no result. She frowns before slapping the side of it until the light comes on. She smiles and says, "See? Now you go down first." Dirk nods before descending down the ladder. Esme follows after him, climbing down with one hand as she holds the flashlight in the other. "Nothing to be worried about. This is just…"

"What now?" Dirk asks. Esme drops the flashlight and it hits Dirk in the head as he looks up. He begins to lose his grip, reaches out and pulls on Esme’s leg causing them both to fall down the rest of the way. Dirk lands with an ‘oof’, and lets out another ‘oof’ after Esme lands on top of him.

Esme apologizes, "Sorry, Dirk." Dirk mutters something under his breath. The flashlight on the floor shines on the two as Esme pulls some hair away from her face.

Dirk grumbles, "You can get off of me, now…"

Esme’s face is bright red as she catches herself staring at Dirk. She climbs off of him and assures, "You’re not my type."

"Same to you," Dirk gruffly clips back.

"It’s just…" Esme goes on. "I haven’t had a boyfriend in a little while, and despite your awful personality, you aren’t… terrible looking."

Dirk’s eyes widen. He glares to the side and states, "Uh… Thanks, I guess."

Esme explains, "Don’t mind me. I just have to retrieve a few of my personal belongings that I haven’t had a chance to."

Dirk looks around the bunker and whistles. "Wow. This place is no joke." He points to a poster on the wall. "Hey, is that the Back Alley Boys?

"Only the greatest boy band of all time," Esme asserts with a nod.

"I had that same poster growing up," Dirk reveals. "My mom said it was for girls before she tossed it out."

Esme looks over at Dirk. She smiles, "She just couldn’t handle your great taste."

Dirk smiles slightly. He frowns. "Ch’uh. Yeah. Duh." He notices a sketchbook. "You draw?"

Esme nods. "I dabble."

Dirk looks over at a framed picture on a shelf. He lifts it up. "Is this you?"

Esme responds, "Yes. Put it down. I don’t want you to break it."

"You swim?" Dirk asks, as he complies.

Esme nods. "Well… I did more during my high school days, but I can hold my own. That’s my team from back then." She sorts some clothing in her personal bag as she transfers it from a dresser.

"Huh," Dirk responds. "I guess you really were acting when you faked your own drowning." Esme glares over at him.

Esme states, "I don’t like thinking about those days. I have a tendency to lose my senses when it comes to men."

"Me, too…" Dirk says quietly. He looks down as he places his hand on his neck.

"What did you say?" Esme asks.

"Uh. This is quite the lodgings. Somebody could live here quite a while without anyone realizing it," Dirk assures. Esme shrugs and then nods. He looks at another poster. His eyes widen. He asks, "Hey, is that a poster of Masc Man Sandy Ravage? I didn’t know you liked pro wrestling.”

"Huh?" Esme asks. "Oh, that. I don’t really. It’s just one of the few socially acceptable excuses to buy a poster of a half naked guy."

"So… Um… You wouldn’t mind if I take it, then?" Dirk asks.

"That?" Esme asks. "Uh. No." She laughs nervously. "That’s supposed to stay down here."

Dirk frowns and says, "Aw… Dang it…" Dirk continues to stare at the poster. He scratches the side of his face as he protrudes his lips.

Esme states. "I’m all done here." She points to a large trunk. "Herman’s costumes are in there. Be sure to be extra careful with them. Okay?" Dirk turns toward her and nods.

The next day, the contestants are gathered together for the challenge, looking through each of Herman’s costumes. Grace looks over at Herman. "You made all these? It’s pretty impressive." Grace holds up a colorful breastplate and a long flowing sarong. "It looks so practical, too."

Herman has a hand at the back of his head. "Shucks, milady. Thou doth not think it too garish?"

Grace assures with a forced smile, "Not a bit. Am I supposed to be a woman with little to no morals?"

Herman blinks. "Nay. Thou art to don the apparel of a desert warrior princess."

Grace forces a laugh. "I knew that, I was just teasing."

"Oh," Herman responds with an awkward laugh.

"Your outfit is so…" Grace responds as she looks up and down at his long pink gown. "Interesting."

"Thanketh thou," Herman replies. "I’m to portray a wise princess… I even made up a backstory. She hath her own lullaby, and everything, if thou would’st like to hear…"

"Maybe we’ll have time if we make the final two together," Grace suggests.

Herman nods rapidly, looking excited. Herman looks over. "It appears that Master Zane wants to check my… how doth thou say mic pack in Elizabethan?" Grace shrugs. Herman continues, "I shalt return." Herman rushes off, after setting his costume down in the chest.

Grace looks after him with a smirk. Quimberly is leaning against a back wall. "I see what you’re doing," she assures. "It’s not going to work."

Grace responds with a coy smile, "I have no idea what you’re talking about."

"Mm-hmm," Quimberly reacts, still seeming aloof.

Grace looks to the side. "I didn’t come all this way just to give up at the very end. I’m not going to lay down and watch Herman win."

"Hm," Quimberly replies. "Noble. Futile, but noble. Herman is going to win no matter what you or I do, so we might as well accept it and help it along."

"What’s that, now?" Herman asks as he walks back up.

Grace explains, "Quimberly seems to think you’re going to win this whole show." Quimberly’s eyes get wide before she glares at Grace.

"That’s not…" Quimberly begins.

Grace continues, "She’s been helping you along behind the scenes, because some ancient prophecy leads her to believe you’re destined to win."

"Ancient prophecy?" Herman looks taken aback. He assures, "Thou must be jesting. I… uh… hath gotten to this point on my own."

Grace assures, "I believe in you… But I can’t say the same for everyone." Grace looks at Quimberly. "That’s why she slipped you the golden ticket a couple challenges ago."

"I doth found that most peculiar," Herman says quietly. He looks over at Quimberly, who nonchalantly looks to the side. Herman then looks down.

"You don’t have anything to say?" Grace asks Quimberly.

Quimberly responds, "Like I said, there’s nothing we can do to stop it."

Grace places a hand on Herman’s shoulder. She assures, "Sorry to be the one to break it to you, but I felt you deserved to know." Herman continues to have his head held down. "Uh, are you…"

Herman states as he quickly lifts up his head, and raises his fists, "This is the coolest thing that hath ever happened to me!"

"Uh," Grace replies, as Quimberly smirks as she looks at her.

Herman adds, "This means that no matter what happens, I shalt be the victor." Herman dances in place as he sings, "Hey nonny nonny."

Grace places a hand over her face. "You’ve got to be kidding."

Esme walks up to the contestants on the stage area. She explains, "In our last challenge before the finale, each of you will compete in an epic quest."

Herman holds his hands together, "Now thou is speakingeth my language."

Esme replies, "Uh. No. I’m talking normal." Herman blinks. "As I was saying… You will each need to start by pulling a rope attached to a barrel. When the barrel reaches you, you will need to balance on it as you roll to the other side of the stage."

Quimberly looks to the side and states, "I used to do this before I could walk." Herman and Grace look at her with wide eyes.

"After you make it to the other side without falling," Esme continues, "you will see a series of clay pots that you will need to smash in order to find a key to a chest. Use your key, which will be engraved with your first initial on it, to unlock your designated chest. Inside, you will find a costume, graciously provided by Herman…" Herman bows his head and waves his hand in front of him. "Put on the costume in its entirety, and then cross the finish line." Esme gestures toward the finish line.

"And the winner earns invincibility?" Grace asks with a raised eyebrow.

Esme smiles. "This is where the twist comes in. We will not hold a traditional vote, tonight." Grace and Herman look surprised, while Quimberly looks at her fingernails. "The first two contestants to cross the finish line automatically will compete in the final two."

"That means…" Herman begins.

Esme clarifies, "Whoever does not place first or second will be instantly eliminated."

Grace states to herself, "So I have a chance after all. I just have to…" She looks over at Herman, and rubs her hands together.

Esme announces, "So if everyone is ready…" The players nod. "Go!"

Herman and Grace rush to their ropes, as Quimberly casually walks toward hers. Herman and Grace put great effort into pulling the barrels toward them. After a little time, Grace gets her barrel first. She pushes it to its side, and begins attempting to walk on top of it, but falls quickly. Esme states, "Grace, you have to go back to the start." Grace groans, but complies.

Herman gets his barrel to him, but then collapses on top of it. Quimberly looks concerned as she looks at his breathing heavily. He assures, "I… shalt… be… alright… Go… on… without… me…" Quimberly nods and pulls her barrel to her in a matter of seconds. She then places her barrel on its side, and steps on top of it. She balances her way to the opposite side of the stage without any errors.

Grace looks on and says, "How in the… I feel like this is cheating, somehow."

Esme asks, "How so?"

"She exists," Grace replies. She falls from her barrel, again.

"Sorry," Esme responds with a grimace. "Back to the start." Grace glares at Esme.

"At least the pot smashing should slow her…" Grace starts. Quimberly smashes a pot on the floor. It reveals a key with the letter ‘Q’ on it. Grace’s eyes are wide. "Unbelievable."

Esme announces, "Quimberly found her key on her first try. Amazing!"

Herman responds between breaths, "Thous’t… RNG… is… inspiring.

Quimberly saunters over to her chest and unlocks it, revealing a black costume with a large red sash. Her eyes widen. "The handiwork on this is spectacular, and nothing impresses me."

Herman blushes. He says, "Thank thou. I must admit I misjudged thou."

"What do you mean?" Quimberly asks as she put on her wig from the chest.

Herman is walking on his barrel. He explains, "Well… I found it odd that thou wert always lingering outside my cabin."

Quimberly raises an eyebrow. "I wasn’t lingering outside your cabin."

Herman’s eyes widen. "Thou wert inside? Wert thou hiding beneath a mattress?" Grace completes the barrel balancing portion of the challenge and moves on to breaking some clay pots.

Quimberly shakes her head. "I don’t know what you’re talking about."

Herman blinks. "But I swear I felt a presence." Quimberly shrugs. "Maybe I wert mistaken."

Esme announces, "Quimberly has finished her part of the challenge, she just needs to cross the finish line to move on." Herman claps, before falling from his barrel and landing flat on his stomach.

"Sorry, Herman, but back to the start," Esme announces.

Grace smashes a pot. She excitedly holds up a key. She rolls her eyes as she looks at it, and then tosses it aside. "You didn’t say you placed decoys." It hits one of the chests, and lands on the stage near Herman’s chest.

"Decoys?" Esme asks. "Zane must have done that without my knowing."

"Here it is," Grace states, as she dusts of her key and holds it up.

Esme announces, Grace has found her key. "She just needs to unlock her chest and put on her costume." Quimberly walks toward the finish line. She pauses as she looks back at Grace. "And Quimberly has… stopped just short of the finish line. Um… Quimberly. You know you have to cross to move on, right?"

"Of course," Quimberly replies. "You’ve only mentioned it a hundred times." Esme backs up, a little. "But this isn’t about me…"

Grace smirks as she rolls up her shirt and places her breastplate over it. She asks, "You don’t have faith that Herman will beat me in this challenge?"

Quimberly assures, "It’s not that. I just know you’re not a believer, so if I finish now, you’re not going to quit. It’s annoying."

Grace assures, "Harsh. But… you would be correct. It’s crazy that you would give up your spot in the final for him."

Quimberly shakes her head. She insists, "It’s my honor."

Grace shrugs and says, "Hey. More power to you, or whatever." Grace finishes her costume by placing an over the top wig on her head. "I will say his designs are pretty great."

Herman responds, "Thanks!" He finishes his barrel roll.

Esme announces, "Grace needs to cross the finish line to move on. Will Quimberly anticlimactically wait for Herman, who just finished the second part of the challenge?" Quimberly folds her arms and looks like she is not going to move. Grace runs across the finish line. "Grace is the first member of our final two!"

"Congratulations, Grace!" Herman states as he smashes pots on the floor.

Grace bows and says, "Thank you. Thank you." She smiles sincerely.

Herman claps as he bends down and picks up a key with an ‘H’ on it. He shouts, "Huzzah!" He scurries over to his chest. Quimberly smiles as she looks on.

Esme looks on and states, "It looks like Herman is going to take this, that is… If Quimberly doesn’t move." Quimberly nonchalantly looks at her fingernails, as Herman takes his time to put on his costume.

Grace has her arms folded as she looks impatient. She says, "Come on, Herman. We don’t have all day."

Herman insists, "I appreciate thine opining, but this art my art. It hath to look as accurate as possible, especially for such an unforgettable moment."

Grace frowns. She admits, "I guess I have to respect that, despite the situation being kind of bogus." She looks over at Quimberly and narrows her eyes.

Herman holds out his hands as he announces, "All done." He is dressed in a blonde wig, tiara, and pink and white dress.

Grace blinks. She adds, "Am I crazy or does he look good like that?"

"Glad you’re seeing his amazingness first hand," Quimberly states.

Herman assures, as a chest is heard slamming shut, "I appreciate the fanfare, verily." Herman’s eyes widen, as he trips over his skirt and lands on his hands on the stage. Esme, Grace, and Quimberly gasp. Herman assures, "No worry. I am unscathed." Herman begins to push himself up as he notices a key fall in front of him. He stares at it for a moment and then to his side. His eyes widen as he looks up. "Quimberly! Cross the finish line!"

Quimberly does not seem to be concerned. She replies, "You are meant to finish before me. Nothing you say can change my mind."

"Quimberly!" Herman yells, again. He continues, "Thou hath to forget about me!"

Quimberly refrains from moving. She adds, "Not going to happen."

"Excuse me, miss," a voice states.

Quimberly steps aside and responds, ”Huh? Oh… Sure. As I was saying…"

Herman holds his head down. "We hath been victims to trickery…"

Quimberly asks, "What?" She looks to her side, and quickly steps across the finish line.

Esme looks to a man standing to her side, opposite of Grace. Esme asks, "Uh. Sorry, sir. This is a closed set."

"Who are you?" Grace asks, with a raised eyebrow.

The brown haired mulleted man has a lanky build but a bit of an obvious gut and an impressively large mustache. He introduces, "The name’s Logan. Pleased to officially meet all of you."

"Logan?" Grace asks. "What business do you have being here?"

"The name sounds vaguely familiar," Esme admits as she taps the side of her face.

Logan explains, "I’ve been competing just like you."

"I don’t think so," Grace replies with a raised eyebrow.

Logan nods and insists, "I have."

"Like you just started yesterday, or something?" Esme asks. She holds up her clipboard and begins rifling through papers.

Logan shakes his head. "I’ve been here from the start."

Esme holds up a list of the contestants, which reveals Logan’s name circled with question marks around it. He points at it. "He’s right. I was wondering who this was."

"See?" Logan adds.

Quimberly responds, "If you’ve been here all along, why didn’t I notice you?"

Logan shrugs, "Who knows? Could be my uncanny ability to go unnoticed… Could be your bizarre fascination with that guy." He points at Herman. "Whatever it is, I’m in the final two, and you’re not."

"This can’t be right," Quimberly assures.

Esme winces. She admits, "Zane is in the editing room, I’ll walkie him to double check, but it doesn’t look good."

"Sorry, Herman," Quimberly adds. "I did what I could, I’ll be sure to win this for the both of us." She places a hand on his shoulder, as he sniffles.

Grace interjects, "Girl. Esme clearly said that the top two in the challenge are moving on."

"But we didn’t know about this guy," Quimberly insists, as she gestures at Logan.

Esme admits, "Sorry, but Grace is right. The rules were that the top two would move on…" Quimberly glares at Esme. Esme winces. "But maybe we can bend the rules a little…"

Grace puts her hands on her hips. She adds, "Uh uh. We are not playing the rule change game. Chris is the only person authorized to change rules according to the official contract, and he’s not here."

Quimberly states, "Fine. Let’s go see Zane to make sure this rando didn’t actually just walk in off the street."

Logan assures, "If you insist, but you’re not going to like what he shows you. Besides, this island doesn’t even have streets."

Esme holds down her walkie talkie, and explains, "I just heard back from Zane. He’s ready for us in the control room."

The contestants are gathered with Zane in the control room with multiple screens paused on moments that capture Logan throughout the competition. "Ah. Here it is." Logan states, with his arms folded.

Zane looks up at a screen in front of him playing the initial episode of the season. He says, "There I am, looking even more handsome than usual."

"Honey," Grace adds. "No amount of editing can make that statement true."

Zane awkwardly chokes in response to Grace. He clears his throat. "There’s no way Lucas…"

"Logan," Logan corrects.

Zane continues, "Could get past my eagle eye on day one." He rewinds to the beginning of the episode where Chris instructs Esme and Zane. Zane lifts his hands from the control panel as he looks astounded.

"Read it and weep," Logan says with a smirk as everyone looks on at him on the screen behind Chris, Esme, and Zane in the opening scene.

"But… the prophecy…" Quimberly states.

Herman adds, "Oh, well. At least we hath each other?"

"Shut up, Herman," Quimberly replies. Herman looks surprised. "Let’s get out of here." Herman nods before following Quimberly out of the control room.

In confessional, dressed in green camouflage and a green bandana, Logan explains, "When I was invited back, I was flabbergasted. I didn’t expect production to remember me, let alone invite me back. I was a little shocked, but mostly not, that they seemed to forget I was even cast on the show, what with the uneven number of contestants. I wanted to fly under the radar, but this was another level. I decided from the first moment, that I could weaponize my ability to go completely unnoticed. That carried me to the end, what with not being noticed during the votes, or being able to sit out of most challenges due to my team’s early lead… Not to mention the cast being too dense to understand why there were always extra marshmallows." Logan looks to the side. "Sure, I would have liked to stand out more, but that wouldn’t have been my personal path to the end." Logan looks to the side. "That was my mistake last time, wanting the narrative to be about me for once, instead of focusing on winning. This time I was unstoppable, because, hey… You can’t stop what you don’t know is there, right? I finally had to expose myself…" Logan blinks. "I mean, reveal myself, but I had no choice at this stage. This is finally my time."

Esme appears in front of the camera with a worried expression. She addresses the camera, "Thank you for tuning into the penultimate episode of Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst. It’s sure to be an epic conclusion as our final two, Grace and…" Esme double checks her clipboard. "Logan… vie for the top spot of Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst!" After holding a smile for a few moments, Esme’s face drops before she rubs her forehead. "What a disaster. Nobody will even know what’s going on…"

Esme walks back into the editing room. She stands behind Zane as he continues to look at footage from the season. Esme says, "Quimberly and Herman have just taken the Boat of Losers off of the island. Quimberly sure seemed miffed. How everything went down seemed to be a surprise to everyone."

"I couldn’t believe it, either." Zane says, "Maybe if I had looked at the footage sooner I would have noticed the guy, but kudos to him for blending into the background."

"It was quite the reveal, that’s for sure. We’ll see how the viewers react…" Zane nods. Esme explains, "Oh, well. I’m heading back to headquarters."

"Alright," Zane replies. "I’ll stay behind here for a little bit. I’m trying to brainstorm on how we can edit all of this together."

Esme nods. "Suit yourself. Don’t stay up too late. Tomorrow’s going to be a big day." Esme exits the room.

Zane says to himself, "There’s something about the footage that’s kind of bugging me, not about Rogan, there’s something else… but I can’t quite place it." He looks back to notice Esme has left the room. "Never mind. I’ll fill her in later. Once I…" Zane’s raises an eyebrow as he looks at the screen. "That’s weird…"

"What’s weird?" A voice from behind Zane asks.

Zane turns in his chair. He says, "Oh, hey, Dirk." He looks back at the screen. "It’s nothing… Just… something that struck me as a little unusual…"

"Okay," Dirk replies with a shrug, he points behind him. "I’mma head back to headquarters."

Zane turns around in his chair to face Dirk. "Dirk…" Zane looks conflicted before he says, "You know I’m your friend, right?"

"Yeah?" Dirk asks as he turns back toward Zane. "What’s up?"

"Call it a hunch," Zane begins. "But I have this nagging feeling… I don’t think you should be hanging around Evan."

Dirk raises both eyebrows. He replies, "What?"

Zane raises his hands and waves them as he admits, "It doesn’t have anything to do with you both being… You know."

"Dudes?" Dirk responds.

Zane awkwardly responds with a hand on his neck, "Right. Uh…" Dirk frowns. He looks up at one of the screens and sees Evan look over his shoulder before entering an area marked ‘restricted’. Zane explains, "I didn’t want you to see that… But dude is sketch. This is the fourth time I’ve seen him walk off to an area without any cameras set up, and get this… Each place was where on of those mysterious ‘sabotages’ happened." He looks at Dirk who has his head held down. "I know this sucks, Dirk, but I’m just trying to look out for you. That Evan kid could have done someone some serious harm, I even think you might have been one of his intended targets." He looks aside. "It ended up backfiring on him in the long run, I guess, but… Look… I know this is hard to hear…"

"Did you tell anyone that Evan and I were… you know… hooking up?" Dirk asks, still with his head down.

Zane shakes his head. "Of course not. That wasn’t for me to tell. I’m only getting involved because I’m worried for you."

"Does Esme know about this?" Dirk asks.

Zane shakes his head. "I just pieced it together after I saw her."

Dirk is quiet for a moment. He finally says, "Thanks, Zane. You’re a good friend. I promise to stay away from Evan."

Zane gives a sigh of relief. He admits, "I didn’t think you were going to take this so well…" Zane turns around and looks back at his screen. "Now that I think of it. The sabotage stopped for a while, after he got hurt, but in the last couple of challenges… It looks like someone was trying to target Luke on that carousel, and then Grace with that firework… Not sure how he managed that with his mobility still limited…"

"Zane?" Dirk asks.

Zane turns in his chair. He asks, "Yeah, man. What is it?"

"I’m sorry," Dirk states quietly.

Zane raises an eyebrow, "Sure, man… Uh… What are you sorry for exac…" Zane’s eyes widen just as Dirk swings his fist into his face, knocking him out cold. The episode ends with Zane lying unconscious on the editing room floor.

### Chapter 17 - Finale Jeopardy

The current show host, Esme, stands in front of the camera and forces a smile. She introduces, "Welcome to the, sure to be exciting, final episode of Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst!" She looks to the side. "I wonder why Zane isn’t responding over walkie…" She turns back to the camera. "We’re down to our final two and ready for the final showdown between our final two competitors. First we have Grace. Our final representative from Total Drama: Boney Island. She’s proven that she has what it takes to get out the competition before they can get her out. And secondly we have… Logan. Who is…" She looks at her clipboard. "Also… here." She frowns. "Maybe I would have noticed him if he was better looking." Esme zips up her raincoat. "I’m sorry to have to keep this intro short. I have to make final preparations for our last challenge, given I’m the only person here… outside of Dirk…" Esme lets out a sigh. She forces a smile and adds, "It’s going to be great. I’m sure of it."

Grace is shown in her cabin. She looks around. She admits, "I think back to how crowded our cabin was on day one. I still can’t believe I made it here. But if there was one thing I learned from my last time out here, it’s that I had to play my hand close to my chest."

"I learned to rely on my strengths," a voice states from off camera.

Grace’s eyes show her surprise. "Who…" Grace’s eyes narrow. "Oh, it’s you. What are you doing here, Lincoln?"

"Logan," Logan corrects. "Don’t mind me. There was a leak in my team’s cabin. Though admittedly, I spent most nights outside in my sleeping bag, until the rain started."

Grace glares to the side. "Stupid rain. It’s made the last few days miserable."

Logan admits, "Maybe the clouds are claiming their revenge on you for yelling at them on your first season?"

Grace’s eyes are wide. "How do you…"

"Trust me," Logan replies. He leans back on a bunk bed. "I’ve done my research. Anyway… I didn’t want to be waterlogged for our final challenge. Which I’m entirely going to win."

Grace assures, "It would be a real letdown to the viewing audience for the guy who debuted an episode ago to win the whole thing."

Logan shakes his head. He assures, "I’ve been here since day…" He pauses. "I’m not going to let you get inside my head. I’m proud of the game I played."

Grace smirks. She assures, "Oh, sure. Getting to the end entirely unnoticed is great strategy. Almost as much as actually having to make moves and maneuver out of getting eliminated."

"Hey, at least I didn’t have to backstab my closest allies." Grace looks to the side. "I see now it was a mistake to reveal that I’ve been inside this cabin for the last four hours," Logan assures.

"The last four…" Grace replies with wide eyes. She looks around. "Where did he…" Grace blinks. "Are you still here?" Grace laughs to herself before looking concerned. She looks for Logan under one of the beds.

Grace explains in confessional, "Maybe I’m just a bit irritable today, but hey, who wouldn’t be? I wanted to battle it out with Herman. But Logan? I don’t know anything about him, or what he brings to the table. Better the dweeb you know, than the dweeb you don’t. Am I right?"

In confessional, Logan has his head held down. He assures, "My game was valid. Yeah, it wasn’t flashy, but it was my only legitimate path to the end. I regret nothing." He looks to the side. "It took a lot of control to not join in on the fun… I had to sit on the sidelines. Of course I wanted to make friendships, and play alongside the others… but we see how it ended my first go around." Logan looks to the camera. "Fifteen million dollars is on the line. That’s an insane amount of money that I still can’t believe is the prize. That has been my focus this entire time. I already live off the grid, but I would use the money to build upon my underground shelter to make sure it could withstand a nuclear blast. Sure. Living in the wilderness is a lonely life, but some people are meant to live their lives in complete seclusion. Out in the Yukon, I get to…" Logan blinks. He averts his gaze from the camera. "I’ve already said too much." He pauses for a moment. "Dang. Finally being noticed has really made me want to let it all hang out. I need to reel it back a little and do what I have to in tomorrow’s challenge."

Dirk is outside dragging a long sack behind him through the mud, wearing a rain poncho. He admits, "I’m sorry about all this, man. I hope you can forgive me when it’s all over. I’m just not cut out to win this kind of thing, so Evan and me have to do what we have to do. If only you didn’t start to catch on, we would have left you alone. He promised me we’d be able to start a life together. I’m sure you’d really like him, if you had the chance to get to know him. You’ll be totally safe, we’re just going to strap you up on a cot in the medical tent. That was my idea."

"Hey, Dirk. Who are you talking to?" A voice asks.

Dirk turns to see Esme standing behind him. He lets out a sigh. He assures, "Uh. Just the laundry."

"Right," Esme responds. She asks, "I’m going to need all hands on deck. I haven’t heard from Zane for the last few hours. Have you seen him?"

Dirk responds. "No. I mean, yeah." Esme raises an eyebrow. "He said he had a hot date on the main land so he took off."

Esme puts a hand beneath her chin. "Really?"

"Yeah," Dirk replies, as he shifts his eyes back and forth. "Why would I lie about that?"

"It’s just, the last I heard, all roads were blocked off outside of Playa des Losers," Esme explains. "The only way to get off the island is to take a boat there, but then he’d be stuck at the resort."

Dirk responds with a nervous chuckle. He adds, "Uh. You know Zane. He wouldn’t let that stop him."

Esme lowers her eyelids a little. She frowns. "Yeah. You’re right. It was dumb to worry about him. I like the guy, but he can come off as real desperate."

Dirk gives a sigh of relief. He mutters, "That’s rich coming from you."

"What was that?" Esme asks. Esme shakes her head. "Never mind. There’s a lot of work to do in preparation for the next challenge. I have a big surprise in store for Grace and… that other guy. I think they’ll be totally gassed to see what Chris had planned for the winner."

Dirk has an eyebrow raised. He asks, "What exactly are we talking about?"

Esme frowns. "I’m not sure if I should say, but it’s something that I’ve had to make sure is kept somewhere especially… safe." Dirk blinks. "When you’re done with the laundry, come find me to help out on setting up the challenge. I could use your muscle."

Dirk looks to the side. "Yeah. I’ll be right over after I check in with Evan."

"Oh, right," Esme replies. "I haven’t been able to stop in on him, lately. How is he recovering?"

Dirk explains, "Pretty great. He’s been able to get around in a wheelchair, he just hasn’t been able to get outside on account of the rain."

"That’s good to hear," Esme assures with a smile. "I’ll catch up with you later. Give him by best." Dirk nods, as Esme walks away. He looks after her for a moment before scratching his head.

The next day, Grace and Logan are gathered in front of two empty cheering sections. "Isn’t this where we were supposed to meet Esme?" Grace asks.

Logan responds, "Were you talking to me? Sorry. I was in the zone." Logan spreads eye black below his eyes. Grace rolls her eyes.

Esme steps up and wipes her brow. "I apologize for the wait." Esme points to the empty cheering sections. "I suppose you’re wondering what these are for."

Logan answers, "I have no idea." He pulls a knife out of his pocket and scratches the side of his face. "Could it be the bleachers the returning players sit on to show their support for one of the finalists?"

"Wow, great guess," Esme responds. "I like him." Logan smiles.

Grace replies with an eye roll, "It’s not like it isn’t what they did every other season."

Esme responds as she rubs her chin, "I suppose that’s true. However…" Esme frowns. "Because the lake is still a bit choppy, we were unable to have the eliminated contestants join us, besides Dirk, who happened to already be here. Dirk, come on out."

Dirk steps out and sits on the bleachers that have Quimberly’s name crossed out, and Logan’s name above it. "Big surprise," Grace states.

Dirk admits, "Hey. I dig the mullet." He gives a thumbs up.

Esme clasps her hands together and says, "The good news is that it looks like the rain is beginning to clear up, so our final challenge will be outdoors."

Logan nods. He assures, "Good. I feel at home in the outdoors."

"Of course you do," Grace adds with her arms folded.

Esme explains, "For your challenge, we have something exciting in store. We are standing in the middle of a star shaped pattern with five points. Each point has an obstacle related to an area of the island, that you no doubt have become familiar with, thanks to your time here. Each point also has a pair of flags, each a color unique to the area." Esme refers to her clipboard. "Whoever returns to this starting area with a flag from each area first will be declared the winner of Total… Drama:… Worst of the Worst!"

Logan bends his neck to each side in an attempt to crack it. Logan insists, "I sat out of so many challenges, I finally have a chance to prove myself. And especially for the most important one." Grace raises an eyebrow as she looks over at him. Logan now places his hands on his hips and bends at the waist in order to stretch.

Grace looks away from Logan, and then at Esme. "So that’s it?"

Esme nods. She explains, "You can go to each point in any order that suits you, and each route is clearly marked. Are you both ready?" Grace and Logan nod. "Then get into your starting positions." Grace and Logan comply. Logan narrows his eyes. Grace heaves a deep sigh. "Go!" Both players begin to run in two different directions. Esme calls out with her hands cupped around her mouth, "I’ll be right here, waiting for you to return." Esme turns to Dirk. "Hey, Dirk. You stay right here. I have to go retrieve something before the contestants return here."

"Where are you headed?" Dirk asks.

Esme looks to the side and laughs uneasily. "Uh. It’s just a special responsibility Chris entrusted to me. You won’t be bored here on your own?"

Dirk shakes his head. He points to a small cardboard box next to him. Dirk explains, "Me? Nah. I’ve got a bunch of old magazines I can look through."

Esme nods, and smiles. "I trust you to hold things down until I get back?"

Dirk nods and replies, "You can count on me."

Esme blinks as she looks at Dirk. She mutters, "I never thought I’d ever have to depend on Dirk of all people." She looks back at him, as he sticks his pinky in his belly button. Esme cringes before walking away from the area.

Grace is shown following the trail through the forest. She looks around. "I wonder where the first flag is... It should be around here if the trail is any indicator. She looks up, and smirks. She spots the pair of green flags, set up on a tree about ten feet above the ground. She glares to the side. "The closest thing I’ve come to climbing a tree was that terrace I got stuck on when I played Julietta from that whacked out musical where I fell in love with a time traveling boy bander… But I guess I have to do what I have to do." She looks up the tree again, and frowns. She furrows her brow, ties her hair into a ponytail, and begins to climb.

Grace walks away on the ground holding her green flag and smirks. She says, "Piece of…"

"Hi-keeba!" A voice shouts from above. Grace looks up and sees Logan diving toward her after leaping from one of the trees. Grace then rushes away from the area. Logan looks back and forth before tucking his green flag into the front of his pants.

Grace hides behind a large tree. She looks over her shoulder. "He’s gone… What rock did they scrape this guy from under?" She lets out a deep sigh.

Logan is next seen digging in a sandy area with a provided shovel. He has his camouflage shirt tied around his forehead. He then reaches down and lifts up one of the yellow flags and clenches it in his fist. "Who woulda thunk my job digging ditches in Djibouti would come in handy here?" He pokes at his belly. "It certainly didn’t give me that six pack…"

Grace is next shown wearing a helmet with a flashlight on it cautiously walking through a cave. She bats away a cobweb. "This place is all things ooky, spooky, and creepy." She looks down at a sign and reads out loud, "Before you stands two paths. One is a dead end, the other holds the violet flag." Grace looks down both paths. She frowns as she closes one eye and points at one path, reciting, "Eeney, meanie, miney, moe," before deciding on a path. She shrugs before heading that direction.

Grace is shown jogging to the next station. She admits, "I lost time choosing the wrong path, so I need to make up some time on the next task." She steps up to a group of tires set up to be stepped through. The area is surrounded in mud. Grace notices a red flag already missing. "Logan has already been here…" She thinks for a moment. "Should I roll up my pant legs?" She frowns. "I’ll buy a new pair of designer jeans after I win this thing." She steps toward the mud, before hesitating after noticing it start to bubble. Grace’s eyes widen as something begins to rise from the mud. The mud drips down to reveal that Logan was hiding beneath the mud. Grace responds with, "Hell naw. I’ll come back here later." She runs from the area.

Logan states, "Looks like my stealth training with the mud men of Madrid had its purposes after all. Go fig."

On the beach, Grace looks out on the water at the pair of blue flags on a floating dock. "Looks like nature boy hasn’t made it to this point." She begins removing her blazer, and shirt, revealing a bikini top beneath. Logan runs up beside her. She asks, "Where did the mud go?"

Logan answers, "I fell into a pond. Kind of convenient, really."

"Whatever," Grace responds. Logan begins removing his vest and shirt. Grace asks, "You wore your swimsuit under your clothes, too?"

Logan quickly drops his pants, wearing nothing else. He states, "No. Finally revealing myself has been so freeing." Grace covers her eyes with her hand, as Logan leaves his clothing on the beach and runs into the water.

Grace acknowledges, "This guy is a straight up freak." Grace hesitates for a moment.

Logan is the first to emerge from the water. He pumps his fist and states, "Awesome. One more to go." He hastily picks up his clothes.

Grace comes out of the water after Logan. She rings out her hair. "You’re fast. Let me guess. You’re a trained scuba diver?"

Logan begins getting dressed. He explains, "No, but I did do some synchronized swimming in Singapore." Logan spreads eye black under his eyes, once more. "Wish I could stick around and chat, but I have a competition to win." Logan rushes off.

Grace smirks and says to herself, "Not if I have anything to say about it."

Logan is seen walking through the cave. He ducks as a bat flies toward him. He reaches the sign with the two separate paths before him.

Grace is seen wiping her brow as she digs through the sand to find the yellow flag.

Esme makes it back to the starting point. She asks, "Dirk? Where did he run off to?" She sets down a silver briefcase. "It doesn’t look like I’ve missed anything, though." Esme raises a hand and holds it flat over her eyes. She states, "Someone’s coming."

"Did I make it back first?" Logan asks as he runs through some brush in order to meet Esme.

Esme holds her hands together and announces, "You have."

Logan drops to his knees and holds his arms in the air. "I can’t believe it! I got super lucky picking the right path in that cave."

Grace runs up next. She looks down at the ground and says, "Shoot. I didn’t get her first."

"Sorry, Grace," Esme assures with a frown. "You did a great job today, and throughout the competition."

Logan adds. "Darn right. You were definitely a formidable competitor."

Esme states, "Now, Logan. Go ahead and show me your flags so we can make it official.

Logan nods. He digs through the front of his pants in order to retrieve the flags. Esme’s eyes get wide. "Here you are." Logan buries his face in his hands. "I still don’t believe it." He holds out the flags.

Grace looks at him. "I can’t believe how unsanitary that is."

"Uh," Esme replies. "Yeah. You don’t have to hand them over. I can see them from here…"

Logan assures, "Totally understandable. I made sure to keep the flags in a secure place."

Esme blinks. "Uh. Logan?"

"It was so much fun being able to compete in the spotlight," Logan admits. "If competing in the shadows was all business, this challenge was all pleasure. Hey, now that I don’t have to keep to myself. I’m starting to talk more than that Blair person. By the way… She was low key kind of cute…"

"Logan?" Esme restates.

"And to think I didn’t even receive a single vote the entire season," Logan adds. "I’m going to go down in history as…"

Esme interrupts. "Logan. Sorry to tell you, but there’s only four out of five flags here."

"One of the greats," Logan continues. "To think. It only came down to…" Logan blinks. "Four flags?" He looks down at his hand. "Where’s the red flag? That was the one from the tire obstacle. I definitely got that one."

Esme shakes her head. She states, "It’s simply not here."

Logan reaches down the front of his pants, again. "It’s got to be here, someplace." He unbuttons his pants to search more thoroughly, leaving his underwear on this time. Clearly flustered, he trips over his pants around his ankles and falls to the ground.

Esme and Logan look after Grace who holds out all five colored flags. She says, "Looks like you got caught with your pants down."

Logan stands up, and pulls his pants up. He assures, "How did you go back to the red flag so fast? That should have taken…" Logan’s mouth is left agape. He points at Grace and looks at Esme. "That’s my flag! She must have stolen it after I left my clothes on the beach."

"Grace, is that true?" Esme asks.

Grace looks at her fingernails and admits, "Sure is."

"But that’s not fair," Logan insists. "We were supposed to earn those flags the hard way, by completing each obstacle."

Grace insists, "You don’t think digging through your dropped pants was the ‘hard way’? Plus, I did the other challenges, mostly so you wouldn’t notice more flags missing."

Esme adds, "Sorry, Grace. I have to agree with Logan. I stated in the rules that…" Esme looks down at her clipboard.

Grace quotes, "’Whoever returns to this starting area with a flag from each area first will be declared the winner.’"

Esme looks blank. She looks at her clipboard and then over at Logan. "Sorry, but… She’s right."

Logan adds, "Well, can’t you make an executive decision?"

"Not on my watch," Grace insists. "Just admit you got outplayed." Logan has his arms folded.

Esme announces, "Sorry, Logan." Esme holds up Grace’s arm in the air. "Grace is the winner of Total Drama: Worst of the Worst!"

Logan still looks annoyed, but he claps, as he glares to the side. He notes, "Hey. There’s a boat coming to the island over by the shore to the east."

"I wonder who that could be," Esme states. She looks back at the contestants.

"Where’s my oversized check?" Grace asks.

Esme smiles. She explains, "Chris decided to change things up this season, and I think it was an excellent idea. Instead of an oversized check…" Esme holds up the silver briefcase. "We have something more tangible. Here’s the full prize, right here!"

"What?" Logan asks. "It was just on the island this whole time?"

Esme nods. "Don’t worry. I kept it in a very secure place, that no one else knew about. If anything happened to it, my job would be on the line."

Grace admits, "Shoot. It all spends the same, I guess."

Logan and Grace gather around Esme. "Without further ado," Esme states. "Congratulations, Grace!" Chris McLean and Officer Douglas step up. "Here is your…" Esme opens the case. "Seventies men magazines?" Esme looks stunned.

"What?!" Grace asks, clearly shocked.

"What?" Logan repeats.

Chris asks, "Esme. What’s going on here? What happened to the money?"

Esme answers, "I… I have no idea. I was the only one that knew about it. I kept it in a secret safe behind a wrestling poster…"

"Where’s Zane?" Chris asks.

"He’s not on the mainland?" Esme asks. Chris shakes his head. "But Dirk…" She looks back at the magazines. Her eyes get wide. She looks at Douglas. "What’s he doing here?"

Douglas explains, "There have been many reports from the voted out players of… a lack of structural integrity with some of the challenge props. Foul play is suspected, lass, as well as an investigation into a serious injury that befell one of the players." He looks at a small notepad. "A certain Evan Sexton III."

"That was just an unfortunate accident," Esme assures.

Douglas states, "Esme. I will need you to come with me for further questioning."

"Am I under arrest?" Esme asks. "For what?"

"Reckless endangerment, for starters," Logan suggests.

"Missing prize money," Grace adds. "That you said you were the only one who knew where it was."

The group walks to The Dock of Shame together. Esme looks particularly distraught. Grace asks, "So what about my prize money?"

Chris explains, "Well… there is no money to give. The extra prize money came from our sponsors, as well as the money for the show itself. There’s nothing left."

Grace folds her arms. Logan asks, "So we played for nothing?"

"I wouldn’t say nothing," Chris states. He holds up both hands. "You had an experience, didn’t you?"

Grace has her arms folded. "That, Mr. McLean is a breach of contract. I think everyone that has competed this season has a case."

"You’re just being dramatic," Chris assures with an eye roll.

Grace narrows her eyes. "I’ll see you in court." Logan and Douglas look on with wide eyes. A loud splash is heard. Everyone turns to see Esme in the water. Grace puts her hands to her mouth.

Douglas holds up a megaphone and calls out, "Esme! Please come back to shore! I promise that you are innocent until proven guilty!" Esme’s head goes below water as she flails her arms and gasps for air.

"I think she’s in real trouble!" Grace shouts.

Logan says, "I’ll dive in after her."

Douglas puts a hand on Logan’s chest. He insists, "Leave this to me, me laddie. I don’t want you held liable if anything happens." Logan nods and steps back. Esme goes below the water.

Zane walks up to the dock rubbing his forehead. "What’s going on?"

"Esme’s in trouble," Grace explains. "She fell into the water. It looks like she’s a suspect for all the shady stuff that happened this season."

"Esme?" Zane asks. "That’s ridiculous. She put her heart into making everything run smoothly, despite things not being in her favor." He glares at Chris. Grace shrugs.

Grace asks, "Where were you?"

Zane explains, "Last thing I remember, I was in the control room, looking into something or other. I don’t remember everything, but… I just woke up strapped to a hospital bed. I was able to get myself free, though, and came right over."

Douglas climbs back onto the Dock of Shame. He is dripping wet. "She’s gone."

"What?" Grace and Logan say in unison.

Zane rushes ahead and shouts, "No! We have to save her." He dives into the water.

Douglas looks back. He assures, "He’s not going to find anything. I searched everywhere close, and there’s no sign of her. I will bring my team in tomorrow and we’ll do a more thorough search." Zane begins to leave the water.

Zane returns to the shore. He grasps Douglas by the collar. He shouts, "By then it could be too late! We need to find her!"

Douglas assures, "I’m sorry. Aye. I was not prepared for something like this to happen. We will do what we can, with the proper team and equipment to do a proper search."

Zane lets go and looks back at the water. He quietly says to himself, "She’s too good of a swimmer to just…" He turns back to Douglas and loudly replies, "Okay."

"Okay?" Grace repeats, looking surprised.

Zane assures, "I trust that our capable boy in blue won’t…" He looks down at Douglas’ kilt. "Skirt the issue."

Grace places a hand over her forehead and asks, "Is this really the time for puns?"

"Sir!" An officer runs up to Douglas.

"Officer Cheryl. What is it?" Douglas asks.

"It’s a code puce, sir," Cheryl explains.

"Code puce?" Logan asks with one of his large eyebrows lifted.

Douglas explains, "It means…" His eyes get wide. "Someone stole our boat!" He runs off with Officer Cheryl.

Dirk and Evan are shown on the police boat, distancing themselves from the island as the officers wave their arms on the shore. Evan, in a wheelchair, asks, "How did you steal this thing?"

"I think they thought I was a valet," Dirk admits. Dirk is steering the wheel of the boat.

"You’re so hot, right now," Evan admits. He holds onto the cardboard box Dirk had with him. He holds it open to reveal the fifteen million dollar prize money. Evan lets out an impressed whistle. "You could have just taken the money and left me on the island…"

"I would never abandon you," Dirk assures. "Besides… it was all your idea." Evan smiles. Dirk leans in and kisses Evan.

### Chapter 18 - Epilogue Roll

After the shocking events of Total Drama: Worst of the Worst, Grace indeed led the charge in taking Chris McLean to court. The process took a matter of years to resolve.

With her close friend and fellow Total Drama: Boney Island competitor, Fiona, serving as her legal representative, Grace sued the show for both reckless endangerment and not upholding the contractual obligation to reward the winner of the show with the fifteen million dollar prize.

Chris McLean maintained that the show was facing bankruptcy due to his frivolous spending, even going as far as wearing nothing but a barrel to the courtroom. After a court ordered investigation, it was discovered that Chris was withholding portions of the show’s budget for his own benefit and personal use.

Not only did Grace receive the prize money in its full amount, she and mostly every other contestant that competed were awarded a sizable amount of money, of an undisclosed amount, for the case of reckless endangerment and the false pretenses of the competition. The series is also understandably in a state of inactivity for the time being.

Despite a thorough investigation of the waters of Lake Wawanakwa, substitute host, Esme has yet to be recovered. Her whereabouts are unknown at this time.

After reviewing the footage of the season, the Royal Canadian Mounted Police have declared missing contestants Dirk and Evan among the country’s Most Wanted for their part in endangering their competitors, as well as being the number one suspects in stealing the show’s prize money, as well as stealing a police vehicle. No leads of the pairs whereabouts are currently known, but if you come into contact with them they should be considered armed and incredibly danger…

A convenience store clerk holds a remote toward a television. She smacks her gum and admits, "I’m tired of hearing about that Total Drama bull. I’ve never been happier for my break to be over." She leaves the break room and takes her place behind a register. Two mustached men approach the counter with their items. She avoids eye contact. "So any big plans tonight?" She apathetically asks.

"Not really," one of the men answers.

"You look familiar…" The men’s eyes get wide. "Like… Overly familiar with each other. You together?" She asks.

They look at each other. "Uh. Yeah."

"Whatever, it’s none of my business," she responds. She blows a bubble with her bubblegum. "Hey." She looks at a board featuring Evan and Dirk’s wanted posters, and then back at the two customers. "You kind of look like those wanted guys." The men look alarmed, again. "But they clearly don’t have mustaches. Have a good night, guys."

"Yeah, you…" one of the men begins. The clerk puts headphones on and looks completely disinterested. The men share a glance before leaving together.

——

A blond haired man with a light beard puts his hands on his hips. He sets foot on the island with his crew behind him. He takes a deep breath and assures, "I can’t wait to explore the island. You guys get things started, I’m going to take a look around." A few crew members nod.

"Aye aye, Captain Jack," one crew member responds.

Jack laughs. "I like that." He walks off of the beach and toward the crew headquarters. He comments to himself, "This place definitely looks like it has gone untouched for a decade." He smiles. "Just the way I like it." He enters an office and surveys the room. He steps inside only to kick something on the floor. He bends down and picks up a journal. He opens it up and peruses the pages. He reaches the final entry. He reads aloud, "To whoever finds this journal, I hope you are well. I have decided to return to the mainland and turn myself in to the police. I’m hoping the truth has come to light, and that my involvement in the terrible tragedies that took place under my watch were not purposely my doing. I am now willing to face the consequences I deserve. I spent several years in hiding in a secluded underground bunker, and if it were not for the severe loneliness that I’m simply not cut out for, I feel I could have remained undetected. There is someone in particular that I missed more than anyone. Part of me hopes that he has been able to move on and find happiness. Another part of me hopes that he missed me as much as I missed him, and that he can forgive me for hiding from my problems. My suspicions are that whoever finds this journal is involved with the Total Drama series. I sincerely wish you luck, and please learn from the mistakes of the past. Yours truly… XOXO. Esme." Jack looks up with wide eyes.

——

Nine years earlier.

Zane is shown talking to Officer Douglas. Douglas asks, "Are you ready to head back to the mainland?"

Zane snaps his fingers as he admits, "I did forget something. I’ll be right with you, just give me about ten minutes."

Douglas nods. He places a hand on Zane’s shoulder and assures, "Take all the time you need, laddie." Zane nods before heading toward the crew headquarters.

As Zane approaches the crew building, he looks over his shoulder slyly. He then darts sharply to the right and runs into the woods. He comes across the closed vault door leading to Esme’s secret bunker. He places his hand on the vault. He then rushes to the trees and begins breaking off branches and placing them over the shelter, as well as finding other loose brush to help conceal it. He wipes his forehead, before heading back to the beach.

## Trivia

### Chapter 1

* I wrote this chapter in honor of the wiki’s 1 year anniversary. I considered just making images and having them represent moments in the season’s theme song. I felt that would be too much work, in the end, but ended up drawing every character, anyway.
* The chapter title, ‘Simply the Worst’, is based on the Tina Turner song, ‘The Best’.
* I was originally going to title the chapter ‘Worst Waiting For’, not remembering that was the title of the original story’s first chapter.
* I wrote this chapter, and rewrote it after being dissatisfied. It had a far more negative tone, so I scrapped what I had, and worked more on making it lighter.
* All of the chapter images were made before I wrote the chapter, excluding the host image and the image featuring Isabella, Skylar, and Hae Won. I have never made chapter images before writing the chapter. This made it challenging to stray from the images when writing, but I’m satisfied with how it turned out.
* After drawing so many of the characters, I decided to draw the rest. It seemed appropriate as this story had been so long coming.
* This is the first time I drew Chris McLean for a chapter image. I changed some colors of the lines on his shirt, but otherwise attempted to stay true to his character design.
* I accidentally drew part of the sleeves on Zane and Esme’s shirts backwards, basing them on Chris’ shirt, but left them as I decided that the shirts can be a little different.
* Esme was originally going to be the sole host, but I decided to bring Chris back and have her and Zane serve as guest hosts. I didn’t like how Esme favored the men when writing the original story.
* Chris revealing that Esme did the casting of the season was meant to explain why so many of the male characters are handsome.
* Evan is described as having multiple girlfriends at once in Total Drama Athletics. While this made it sound like he was cheating on one, the intent was always meant that they were a throuple. I purposely wrote that way to make it seem a little less racy for the old wiki. This time I tried to clarify by his explaining that it was with their knowing.
* The image with Angelo, Dirk, and Evan has Evan in a shirt different from his character image. This was done as the stripes were too tedious to redraw. He also has no English writing under the character on his neck as I couldn’t read what it said in the small version of the character image and just decided to exclude it.
* Evan’s merman tattoo has his tail moved slightly as it fit better that way.
* Dirk calling Zane a string pole is meant as him mixing up the terms ‘string bean’ and ‘bean pole’.
* Blair stating that Dirk was no ‘day at a picnic at the park’ was her mixing the phrases ‘no day at the beach’, ‘no picnic’, and ‘walk in the park’.
* Blair saying that she didn’t want to blather on and on and on and on is a reference to ‘On and On’ by Erykah Badu.
* Blair noticing something different about Frederick is in reference to his nose job.
* While one of my favorite scenes in the original chapter for Total Drama: Worst of the Worst was Angelo’s being shirtless due to a raccoon’s breach birth, somehow set up by Esme, I changed the reason to a charity to keep the new chapter almost completely different.
* LeVar was meant to be sixteen or seventeen in his original season. Though Total Deception Island included minors and adults, I want the characters in Total Drama: Worst of the Worst to all be over eighteen.
* Frederick bragging about his flip phone was to be both silly and a nod to this story being in the past.
* I had attempted to make the image of LeVar and Frederick’s flexing an animated gif of LeVar pec popping, but it didn’t turn out how I wanted.
* This image was intended as the ‘pack your bags ‘cause I’ve already won’ portion if I had gone with the idea to draw images for the theme song. I included the line in reference to Quimberly. It would have been two images, one with the guys flexing, and another with them looking back once they realize Quimberly is behind them.
* I made LeVar’s shirt tighter in this image. I liked the idea that it mixes his love of cosplay with his cocky demeanor.
* Patsy references Casablanca with two of her initial comments.
* Patsy noting Brent as inspiring her was a reference to him being Ruth’s muse in Total Drama Reality. This is again referenced when she draws him after he was injured by Anders.
* There are a few jokes about Brent’s pecs. This was drawing attention to them as he was less muscular in Total Drama Reality. If I designed him now I probably would not have made him as muscular, but the character design was intentional as I wanted him to look considerably more mature from his first appearance, and also to explain why Esme chose him to be on her cast of good looking guys.
* I accidentally exposed Brent’s eyebrows as I drew his bangs a little higher up, but decided to leave it.
* Ruth’s casual reference of her girlfriend makes her the first official lesbian character. I felt she would be comfortable with her sexuality, and I didn’t want to have a long drawn out coming out story for her, as I did that with Dante.
* Luke mentioning Evan’s mom letting him compete was a reference to his lying about her consenting to let him compete on Total Drama Athletics.
* Jerome references our nickname for Luke, Johnny Longtorso. The name is a joke from Mystery Science Theater 3000.
* Luke removes his checkered shirt after Jerome insults it. The main reason for this is so I didn’t have to redraw the complicated pattern.
* Jerome ‘reading’ the contestants, and Ruth stating that Jerome was serving golf dad realness are references to Ru Paul’s Drag Race.
* I considered mentioning that Jerome’s outfit resembling Bill Cosby, but did not want to reference the now controversial actor.
* Jerome’s insulting his competitors outfits was an image difficult to write as lighthearted, but I attempted to do so by he and Ruth bonding.
* I considered having Luke being more adept at sign language, with Evan being less skilled but putting in effort. I decided it would be more suited to Angelo’s character to know sign language.
* Patsy was going to call Holly’s behavior ‘sus’, in reference to the video game Among Us. I decided against it with it being a modern reference, even though the term has been around for a long time.
* Skylar’s shoelaces are described as being tied together. His legs are not together in the image, but I imagine his knee bent so his feet can still be tied together.
* Cary and Skylar reference Three Dog Night’s ‘Joy to the World’.
* I did not intentionally make Isabella cover her t-shirt graphic with her hand so I didn’t have to draw it. That was just coincidence.
* I don’t like the way Skylar’s arms are down in the image, as it doesn’t make sense after he was just previously juggling, but I didn’t feel like changing it.
* The mauve color of Cary’s luggage is meant to resemble the color of Grant’s shirt.
* Cary originally did not have his underwear showing, but I thought it looked odd without it.

### Chapter 2

* The chapter title, Search Party Poopers, is based on the terms ‘search party’ and ‘party poopers’.
* Holly is dressed as Jezaille Brett, a character from The Great Ace Attorney Chronicles. This is a continuation of the other Ace Attorney outfits used in her character models.
* Anders Minotaur costume also features a golden speedo, a reference to Rocky Horror from The Rocky Horror Picture Show.

### Chapter 3

* The chapter title, Total Treasure Island, is a reference to Total Drama Island itself and Treasure Island.
* The red dragon was modeled after the very impressive Total Drama style monster art of Milesdoesar1.

### Chapter 4

* The chapter title, Tank U, Next, is based on the Ariana Grande song, Thank U, Next.

### Chapter 5

* The chapter title, Game Show Up and Show Out, is a mash up of ‘game show’ and ‘show up and show out’.
* The original chapter title, Game Showdown, is a mash up of the terms game show and showdown.
* The chapter title was changed because I unintentionally repeated a chapter title from a previous story.
* The challenge is based on 70’s game shows.
* The contestants pictured are all in seventies style gameshow costumes. Zoe and Blair are not representing specific references. Herman is dressed as Lupin III. Jerome is dressed as Rerun from What’s Happening? LeVar is dressed as Han Solo. Grace is dressed as a memorable Price is Right contestant whose tube top fell down as she was called to come on down. I regretted not making more references to specific game show contestants, but had the idea too late.
* I also regretted not using black as the font color for The Black Swans sign in the image with Zoe and Blair.
* This is the first time since Total Drama: Boney Island that I held a fan vote for a returning player midseason.

### Chapter 6

* The chapter title, Keepin’ It Relay, is a combination of the terms ‘keepin’ it real’ and ‘relay’.
* The challenge is based on Double Dare.

### Chapter 7

* The chapter title, Runway or Another, is based on a fashion runway and the Blondie song, ‘One Way or Another’.
* The men’s costumes are based on different pro wrestlers and Pokémon. The ones pictured were Jerome as The Rock and Machamp, Reginald as Ricky ‘The Dragon’ Steamboat and Hydreigon, Anders as Andre the Giant and Togepei, Brent as Shawn Michaels and Bisharp, and Luke as The Miz and Blastoise. Douglas, in a cameo, is also dressed as Rowdy Roddy Piper. The contestants not picture but described in story were Herman as Rey Mysterio and Uxie, Evan as Jake the Snake and Ekans, and Cary as The Ultimate Warrior and Entei.
* In addition to Douglas from Total Deception Island, this chapter features a cameo from Isaiah from Total Drama Tropics.

### Chapter 8

* The chapter title, A Bridge Too Far, is not a usual play on words or double entendre, as ‘a bridge too far’ is a standalone phrase. I thought of naming it something like ‘A Bridge Too Far and Away’, but felt the simpler title sounded better given the serious tone of the chapter. I also felt a reference to a literal bridge was good enough.
* This chapter is one of the most unusual I have done, given the cutaways to officers watching the episode and breaking the fourth wall.
* This chapter features another cameo from Isaiah from Total Drama Tropics.

### Chapter 9

* The chapter title, Don’t Cry Over Spilled Tea, is based on the expressions ‘don’t cry over spilled milk’ and ‘spill the tea’ (referring to gossip).
* The quadruple elimination was planned for some time, though who would be eliminated changed a few times before the chapter was written.

### Chapter 10

* The title, Wall or Nothing, is based on the phrase ‘all or nothing’.
* The challenge in this chapter is based on a frequent competition on Big Brother called The Wall Comp.

### Chapter 11

* The chapter title, Heaven Sentai, is based on the term ‘heaven sent’ and the Sentai genre of Japanese superhero action programs.
* The Lucky Seven, as Herman revealed the costumes for the challenge were based on, are a reference to the marshmallows from Lucky Charms cereal.