The Sanctity

### Characters (in order of appearance)

The Commander, Mee, The Stem, Space Tree, Allon, SpeshDiv Robot, wedding guests (non speaking)

## Credits

### Special credits

The Stem
Bryan Waterman

Cartoony McSlowmake
Ed Atlin

The Commander is getting married while Space Tree and Mee run out of ideas to get free booze.

## Transcript

*(The Commander is hanging up a "L for Longface Man" poster. Mee walks by.)*

**MEE:** Well, well, well.

**COMMANDER:** What?

*(Close up on Mee's mouth)*

**MEE:** Well, well, *well*.

**COMMANDER:** What?!

**MEE:** It looks like a little special delivery arrived for the Commander.

**COMMANDER:** Really? Well let me see, maybe it's those x-ray specs I —

*(He opens the package, revealing a wedding dress)*

**COMMANDER:** What the hell?

**MEE:** So, what do you need a wedding dress for?

**COMMANDER:** It's not what you think, alright, some guy just wants to marry me is all.

**MEE:** Well, that is pretty much what I thought.

**COMMANDER:** It's not like I had a choice, the guy was going to kill me if I didn't at least get engaged to him.

**MEE:** Well I guess you really put the *gay* in en-*gay*-gement, am I right?

**COMMANDER:** Yeah, I guess so. But anyway, here's what happened last year.

*(He whistles the transition flashback noise, which is also heard as the scene changes to a field, in black and white. The Commander is wearing his cheerleader outfit from Trumpet Shenanigans and talking to The Stem.)*

**COMMANDER:** There, I'm wearing this stupid engagement ring, are you happy?

**THE STEM:** You think it's stupid?

**COMMANDER:** Well, no, it's not stupid, it's... pretty nice, but I'm still not gonna marry you!

**THE STEM:** Oh, you're gonna marry me. And we're gonna have a beautiful April wedding. And you're gonna love it!

**COMMANDER:** An April wedding? But that's months away!

**THE STEM:** It sure is. And unfortunately it's customary in *my* religion for the groom and bride not to see each other between the engagement and the wedding ceremony. So I'm going to have to temporarily a'bid you adoooo...

**COMMANDER:** Yeah, that's a shame. Wait, does that mean I can leave?

**THE STEM:** I'm afraid so. I'll see you in April, sweetheart.

**COMMANDER:** Yeah, see you in April. *(He leaves, then pokes his head back in.)* Suckerrrrrrr-r-r-r-r-r-r-r...

*(Back on the ship. Space Tree is behind the Commander, holding a sheet of paper.)*

**COMMANDER:** I guess I just hoped he'd forget about the whole thing like I did. But if he expects me to put on this comfortable dress so that I can marry him, then he'll just have to find me first.

**MEE:** He's right behind you.

*(The Commander screams and runs off.)*

**SPACE TREE:** Good one.

**MEE:** Yeah, so I guess the Commander's gonna be putting the "homo" in "Holy Matri-homony."

**SPACE TREE:** That one wasn't as good. Anyway, this wedding invitation I got says that there's gonna be free food and booze there, so I say we convince him to go.

**MEE:** Well how are we gonna do that?

**SPACE TREE:** I don't know, Meelord Marone, I just don't know.

*(Cut to the Commander's room. Space Tree pokes his head in the door.)*

**SPACE TREE:** Hey Commander, you should totally marry that guy.

**COMMANDER:** *(stands up)* Okay. *(thinks for a moment)* Wait a second, no. *(sits back down)*

**SPACE TREE:** ... Oh. Okay then.

*(Back out in the hall)*

**SPACE TREE:** Well, I'm out of ideas.

**MEE:** Don't worry Space Tree, I've got a backup plan that never fails.

*(The Commander's room again, Mee pokes his head in the door.)*

**MEE:** Hey Commander, you should totally marry that guy.

**COMMANDER:** *(stands up)* Okay. *(thinks for a moment)* Wait a second, no. *(sits back down)*

*(Mee just stares blankly. Back out in the hall...)*

**MEE:** It's like he's always one step ahead!

**SPACE TREE:** Dammit, we should be able to outsmart the Commander, he's the dumbest one on the ship. Or is he?

*(Later, ST and Mee have Allon dressed up as the Commander)*

**SPACE TREE:** Okay Allon, if anyone asks, your name is the Commander.

**ALLON:** Cool, I've always kinda wanted to be a commander, you know? Ever since I—

**SPACE TREE:** *(interrupting)* Yeah whatever. Now let's go get some of that free wedding cake.

*(The commander enters the room)*

**COMMANDER:** Hey, what the hell's going on here?

**SPACE TREE:** Well, since you don't want to go to the wedding, Allon here has stepped up to take your place. He actually respects the sanctity of marriage.

**ALLON:** What wedding?

**COMMANDER:** Oh, so that's how it is, Allon. After all I've done for you, you're just going to go and steal my new husband?

**ALLON:** *(surprised)* Husband?!

**COMMANDER:** Well I'm gonna go through with this wedding, because if anyone respects the sanctity of marriage, it's me!

**MEE:** Mee?!

**COMMANDER:** No, me.

**MEE:** Oh, I thought you said Mee.

**COMMANDER:** Come on everyone, let's go to *my* wedding. *(Space Tree and Mee leave.)* And don't steal my clothes. *(He tears off Allon's Commander shirt, revealing a "Just Fine" t-shirt.)*

**ALLON:** Someone's getting married?

*(At the wedding...)*

**SPESHDIV ROBOT:** And now I will ask the question. Do you, The Stem, take this, uh, commander, to be your space wife?

**THE STEM:** Hell yeah.

**SPESHDIV ROBOT:** And do you, Commander Uderick Michelle Xander...

**MEE:** Heh heh, Xander.

**SPESHDIV ROBOT:** ... take this flower guy to be your space husband.

**COMMANDER:** Okay, hold on a second. It may be written with two L's and an E, but it's pronounced *Michael*, not Michelle. Do I look French to you?

**SPESHDIV ROBOT:** No, but you look like an idiot.

**THE STEM:** Hey, that's my almost wife you're talkin' to there. And it's all moot anyway because after the ceremony you're gonna be known as "Wife of The Stem." And I'll be known as "Husband of Wife of The Stem." And you'll be known as "Wife of Husband of Wife of The Stem."

**COMMANDER:** So does that mean you'll be known as "Husband of Wife of Husband of Wife of The Stem?"

**THE STEM:** NO!

**VOICE FROM CROWD:** Get on with it, you fucking flower!

**THE STEM:** Oh, who the hell said that?

**MEE:** Uh, it wasn't me, but while you're looking, why aren't there any friggin' chairs here?

**THE STEM:** I don't need chairs, I live in a pot full of dirt.

**MEE:** Yeah, well some of us actually have legs.

**SPACE TREE:** Speak for yourself, human... oid. And don't knock the dirt, I lived in a pot of dirt for five years and they were the best years of my life.

**THE STEM:** Yeah, you tell him, dirt brother.

**SPACE TREE:** Yeah why don't you shut up Bill and Ben, the flower pot... man.

**THE STEM:** Oh yeah, that's a good one.

**SPACE TREE:** Yeah well, *you're* a good one.

**THE STEM:** What?! Nobody calls me a good one. *(He gets up on his metal legs, walks over to Space Tree and kicks him away)*

**MEE:** Oh, so you *do* have legs, you dirty, fat liar!

**THE STEM:** Oh, so now you got something else to say?

**MEE:** *(Defiantly)* Yes.

*(The Stem kicks Mee away)*

**COMMANDER:** Well way to go The Stem, you just kicked away my two friends who ruined our whole stupid wedding.

**THE STEM:** Hey. Shut the hell up.

**COMMANDER:** Sorry isn't good enough! And you know what? The wedding is over. I don't want to marry you anymore.

**THE STEM:** Oh, honey, it's not like you have a choice.

**COMMANDER:** Oh yeah.

**SPESHDIV ROBOT:** I now pronounce you Stem and wife. The end.

*(The Stem sings over the end screen and credits)*

**THE STEM:**

Here we are, oh you and me,

So fancy free.

Commander and The Stem

Living in harmony!

*(roll credits)*

## Fun Facts

* A couple of weeks before the episode's release Bryan Waterman of watermanstudios.com had stated on his page that he would be making another voice appearance as The Stem in Episode 47. He followed this up with another post on the day of the episode's release.
* With 29 characters, including the wedding guests, this episode has the most characters in it.
* During the flashback "THAT EXPLAINS IT" is written at the bottom of the screen.
* This episode is the 4th to have an uncensored obscenity, joining Hand Shake, Frame Game, and Forescore Jones: Xmas. The Commander followed immediately after.
* The wedding invitation Space Tree holds says: "There's gonna be free food and booze there".
* The sign on the wall of the Commanders room says "DO IT MAN!", when Space Tree comes in. When Mee comes in, it says "DO IT AGAIN!"
* When Space Tree says "Bill and Ben, the flower pot... man" "die" is written a dozen times at the bottom of the screen.

* The guests (many of which are from Ed Atlin's other works) at the wedding are:
	+ left group:
		- 4th row: the Broom, Forescore Jones, Dancing Candy Cane, Snitch;
		- 3rd row: Watermelon Head, Erik the Juiceman, Tarbob;
		- 2nd row: Frank, Ted #1, Random McPerson;
		- 1st row: Ghost Spider, Black Kid, Carrots, Space Tree's Date;
	+ right group:
		- 4th row: Space Tree, Mee, Ted #2;
		- 3rd row: Alien, Fuck You Dude;
		- 2nd row: Mee's boss, Mr.Warden, Psycom;
		- 1st row: the Pizza Cat, a kid with "Boner" written on his shirt, Bird and a cactus that may or may not be Cactus;
	+ An Anti-Space Terrorist can be seen in the background while The Stem is walking towards Space Tree.
* If you resize the flash file window near the end, the Commander is wearing pants over the wedding dress

## References

* The flashback of the Commander and the whole marriage thing refers back to Trumpet Shenanigans.

* The Commander stands in front of a poster of a movie called "L for Longface Man". It features Philip Seymour Horseman and the top of the poster says "Back from the dead to kick you in the bread", a phrase used in Ash Hole. The whole poster reads:

BACK FROM THE DEAD

TO KICK YOU IN THE BREAD

(a picture of the Longface Man)

L FOR LONGFACE

AN UNCOMPROMISING VISION OF THE LONGFACE MAN

STARRING PHILIP S. HORSEMAN

COMING SOON

LforLongface.meg

* The package the wedding dress is in looks like the one from Space Package.
* Space Tree's "I just don't know"-line refers to episode 1 of Stabby McGee, another cartoon by Ed Atlin. Skoop said this line to Stabby, after he insulted an old school friend instead of just stabbing him.
* Space Tree's 'Or is he?' is another running gag.
* Another standard running gag is the me/Mee thing between the Commander and Mee
* Allon wears the "just fine" shirt from I'm Gonna Kill You in the Space under his Commander suit.
* This is the second instance of the Stem kicking Space Tree away, it also happened when The Stem and Space Tree quarrelled in Trumpet Shenanigans.
* Commander Uderick **Michelle** Xander saying that he isn't French is a reference to episode 3 of Stabby McGee, another cartoon by Ed Atlin. In this episode, a girl named "Michelle" wants to be called "Chelle" because there's no 'mi' in her name like "some French pilot".
* The broom from Panic Broom can be seen in the top left corner of the wedding guests scene.
* The Pizza cat is from Business Opportunity.
* Fuck You Dude (the guy with FYD on his shirt) is from another short movie of Ed Atlin called FYD, which uses a clip from a Stephen Lynch album.
* Watermelon Head, Ted (the guy with the ":)"-tie) and the kid with the "boner"-shirt are from Ed Atlin's cartoon Watermelon Head.
* The L for Longface poster is a parody of one of the promo posters for V For Vendetta.
* Erik The Juiceman is from another cartoon/comic of the same name by John Perazza.
* The guy yelling "GET ON WITH IT YOU FUCKING FLOWER" is a reference to the character Donny from The Trailer Park Boys, as confirmed by Ed Atlin in a forum post here.