J

J

The Great Beardsby

"**J"** was Alison Velvet's lifelong best friend and eventual boyfriend. He was only known to most as the monosyllabic name "J" and was very rarely referred to as anything else. J had a very wild imagination and would often over-analyze any given topic, from the logistics (and lack thereof) of horror films to the possibility of Jesus Christ existing in *The Grinch*.

He first appeared in *Ali Watches Howard the Duck*. For several years, J was nothing more than a background character. In mid to late 2018, J became a main character with episodes centered around him and his imaginative musings.

His younger self, nicknamed Baby J, is voiced by Random Yori.

## **Biography**

Very little is known about J's life, past or present. His full name has yet to have been revealed. Ali has referred to him as "baby" and "buddy" in various shorts, while very rarely actually referring him by "J" or any other real name. In *My Friend, Chewie*, he's only credited as "The Boy", otherwise going completely unnamed in the short. In *The Hipster*, the Angel admits to not knowing what his name is, instead referring to him by various nicknames.

### Childhood

His childhood home was very run-down and unkempt, as seen in *My Friend, Chewie*. He would often play alone in his backyard, which was littered with cigarette butts, beer cans & bottles, and garbage. Despite his imagination and naivete, he didn't believe in Santa Claus as a youth. He loved *Star Wars*, and would often play with his father's vintage action figures, which he was otherwise forbidden to touch. It's implied that his father was very protective of these old toys, despite keeping them hidden away in a box. J reasoned that toys are for play with, and that someone had to play with them someday. His favorite character was Chewbacca the Wookiee.

As a child, he was very fond of visiting VHS rental shops. He loved to walk up and down the aisles and gaze at all the colorful film covers, as though each piece of box art was a window into a new world.

One holiday season, young J was frightened by the covers of the horror films *Jack Frost* (1990) and *Pinocchio's Revenge* (1996), believing them to be sequels to the children's films *Jack Frost* (1991) and *The Adventures of Pinocchio* (1996), where he assumed the heroes "turned to the dark side" and became killers.

It is implied that J was abused as a child. During the events of *My Friend, Chewie*, he had a black eye. Later, he mentions that he occasionally gets backhanded, and that "nobody seems to care" when he reports it, despite being taught to report abuse to authority. He says that he's often referred to as an "accident" or a "little mistake" by his parents. After realizing that his encounter wasn't entirely true, he breaks down in tears, saying that he will always be a loser. He claims that nobody in his home likes him, and expresses desires to leave his home for a more fulfilling and exciting life.

### Adulthood

As an adult, J was just as imaginative, and would often watch or discuss films at length. He has a job, which as of yet has never been revealed. He has a collection of random things he finds in his life (such as buttons, toys, and magnets) which he keeps in a small cardboard box labeled "J's Box of Whimsy."

### Relationship with Ali

Ali and J have been best friends since their very early childhoods, and girlfriend/boyfriend since at least high school.

As children, they would play with *Star Wars* action figures together, with J referring to Ali as his "own Princess Leia". When J breaks down after accepting that his encounter with Chewbacca wasn't real, Ali reassures him that she will always be there for him, and that they'll be "friends till the end".

As adults, Ali and J became a couple. They live together, and spend most of their time together.

They often go to movies together, and will occasionally have sex during screenings.

## **Physical Appearance**

J has a large, round head with jet black hair. In earlier appearances, he appeared clean-shaven. Beginning with *The Dummy* onward, J began sporting a thick black beard with hints of gray. He's always had an affinity for beards; when he was abducted by Bigfoot, J collected a pile of shed hairs and stuck them to his face, affectionately referring to them as "Beard Brothers".

He wears a red button shirt (occasionally with the sleeves rolled up), a white T-shirt underneath, blue jeans, and black shoes. He's also known for wearing a grey beanie cap with the number 69 sewn in white. In early appearances, he also donned a grey hoodie jacket and had a black eye.

## **Personality and traits**

Compared to Ali, J is much more timid, reserved, and shy. Unlike her, he doesn't use curse words. He has had an active imagination since his early childhood, and never ceases the opportunity to imagine the what-if's about any given topic.

## **Behind the Scenes**

Baby J is voiced by Random Yori, making her the only actor to ever play both Ali and J.

## **Appearances**

* *Ali Watches Howard the Duck*
* *Ali & The Peanut Eyed Ghost*
* *The Clerk* (indirect mention only)
* *Vader Helmet*
* *Candy*
* *New Leaf*
* *The Nasty (disguise)*
* *Cheaper 2*
* *The Dummy*
* *Monster*
* *Gumby* (indirect mention, photograph only)
* *Ready Player Ali*
* *Moss Man*
* *Ali's Boots* (photograph only)
* *Hockey Masks*
* *Jack Frost*
* *Jesus Heals a Who!*
* *Chucky*
* *Halloween Safety Tips with Ali & J*
* *My Friend, Chewie*
* *The Roaring Twenties*
* *Leprechaun vs. Leprechaun*
* *Shatner vs. Myers*
* *The Hipster*