Croco-Deal

"**Croco-Deal**" is the fifth episode of season one of *The Crumpets*.

## Synopsis

Granny takes care of Renato and awaits to make money off of him after his owner Grownboy leaves to settle his best friend's dispute. Meanwhile, the tummy hatch of Ma malfunctions and won't open while it is Lil'One's turn to get inside.

## Plot

Lil'One, who is being held by Ma, gets beaten at taking a turn to go inside her tummy hatch by Pfff, because his favorite band The Pussydolls are breaking up. Ma demands her teenage son to leave, which he won't unless the group reunite. Caprice arrives and insults the group, saying the word "crappy" and nearly says "damn" until Ma admonishes her for cussing near Lil One. Caprice answers a phone call, pulls Pfff from the tummy hatch, and goes there as Lil One gets frustrated. After Caprice leaves and gets upset from the phone conversation, Ohoh also enters the tummy hatch, this time because Pa told him a red button he touched would cause the world to end. Even King (who is not seen) went inside and tells Ma on Blister telling him that a spider had laid eggs in his mouth. Building Lil One's anger, T-Bone gets his turn too yet Ma doesn't like him in the tummy hatch.

In the workshop and as Ma sits on the upside down car, Grownboy is heard from the tummy hatch, worrying on the ultimatum between his friend Steve or the pet crocodile Renato. After Ma asks him who's Renato, Grownboy explains to her he obtained his "inseparable" crocodile six months ago. Grownboy would also mention her of Steve's jealousy and use of blackmail. Lil One growls at not having his turn to which Ma responds he's not the family's only child. Grownboy proposes having his mother to look after Renato as he cools his bond with Steve. Ma responds with shock and refuses over her fear of reptiles. She shakes her head no as Grownboy tries to convince her.

Due to his impatience for so long, Lil One tries to commit suicide by jumping to a noose hanging from the hall's ceiling. Once he fails to reach the noose and falls to the floor, Ma calms him down and offers the tummy hatch to him. She discovers its door jammed before Lil One faints.

Grownboy comes to an agreement with Granny to take care of Renato. The latter tells him to not give a word on the crocodile to his mother. As Grownboy becomes anxious on Renato's place to stay, he explains Granny that the crocodile needs two buckets of meat a day. Granny promises to take good care of him while she dreams of having Renato cut into valuable accessories and clothing. After Grownboy gets her attention, she knocks the trailer's door to unleash water and Renato, and Grownboy talks to his pet of the sitting that will come. Both Grownboy and Renato get teary-eyed as the former departs, and the latter cries as he's under Granny's control, which pulls and bounces him.

Lil One waits for his mother fixing her tummy hatch. She fails to resolve the issue through oiling before bringing a screwdriver and trying to pop it. At failure, the screwdriver flips in the air and hits the two.

In Grownboy's bedroom, Granny brings Renato and seeks for his "croco-kibble". Meanwhile, Ma tries a plunger contraption to fix the tummy hatch. Lil One activates it at her command at the machine shook and throw her out the house. She would land in a pile of manure being worked by Pa and tell him of the hatch's "glitch".

During nighttime, Granny brings home a bag of live puppies for Renato. Back to Grownboy's bedroom, she notices the crocodile missing. Lil One eats and leaves food at his path, causing Renato to follow him to the bathroom. Sitting on the toilet with no nappy, Lil One discovers Renato to his surprise and Granny shuts the two, quieting the latter or else he can get eaten or "potty-trained". She brings the two to Grownboy's bedroom and starts feeding Renato the puppies, although the puppies can walk out his mouth. She mentions to Lil One a secret to fixing Ma's hatch. At Lil One's begging, she claims it to be a secret passed down from her grandmother and the latter's grandmother. She asks to count on his trust, but Lil One misunderstands the word "count" as counting to three to throw a puppy to Renato. She questions him if she can trust him, he nods yes, and she reminds him that failing to keep Renato a secret from Ma could have the latter die from Lil One's fault. Once Lil One agrees, Granny appoints him "croco-feeder" and they close the deal.

At her bedroom, Granny dresses in a variety of exotic costume and uses her phone and computer to sell accessories made from Renato in advance at high prices. Lil One is still curious of the secret she promised, but even though he cleaned the litter box as she wanted, she persists making these shady transactions.

Ms. McBrisk comes over to the Crumpet house, having heard from Caprice on Ma's broken hatch. McBrisk explains to her of a psychosomatic and that she felt one after the birth of Cassandra. She suggests having Ma's fallopian tubes "sliced and diced" at Ma's opposition. When Lil One asks his mother what Pfff is doing, Ma says "nothing dear" at a fierce tone. McBrisk finds this message as means to take out her own pocketwatch, which was inherited from a set of female ancestors. She swings this hypno pendulum to Ma who would go to a very brief sleep. Ma opens her eyes white at McBrisk's command and is asked to recall what happened before the hatch was broken. Ma would repeat Grownboy's words from their earlier conversation. When being told what's the meaning, Ma's response is to "throttle the chicken", at the family's disgust. McBrisk wakes Ma and announces the resolution as not acting like a headless chicken, to wake her "sleeping tiger", and live her life free. The pocketwatch rings and McBrisk leaves the house without keeping it with her, and Lil One snatches it. Pa gets disheartened at being an obstacle on McBrisk's advice for his wife.

As he prepares to impress Ma, Pa dresses in a blue superhero costume but goes back to dressing at dissatisfaction. Meanwhile, the auction bids for Renato's parts skyrocket to Granny's enthusiasm. Lil One suddenly appears on her bed and swings the pocketwatch at Granny. Ma would also be seen in Grownboy's room, unknowingly walking on Renato and watching a documentary tape called *Heroic Females*.

Lil One speaks to the hypnotized Granny wanting to unveil her secret. Her response is saying that they need to slice and dice the crocodile. After Lil One repeats his demand, Granny admits she made the secret up in order to "make off with all the earnings". Back to Ma, while she watches the tape, she finds a scene where a mother giraffe goes to "heroic female mode" and protects her offspring by kicking a charging rhinoceros. Lil One shows up before she comments the courage she would never be "so wild", and he remarks that she is stronger than the giraffe.

In the night, Lil One pushes a bear trap and Pa prepares a serenade outside with Ma. Granny wakes up from hypnosis and kicks the door to the hall, finding King holding a book titled "Skinning Crocs for Dummies" and getting that book. A worried Ma hears Pa's Spanish-styled song and goes to the balcony to watch him. Lil One would be seen riding on Renato and holding a stick lifting a puppy in front of the crocodile. As Granny finishes reading the book and prepares to kill Renato with her chainsaw, Lil One forces the puppy and the bear trap to Renato's mouth, the latter sticking to it like teeth. He activates a light, and projecting his and Renato's shadows, pretends to be in danger of getting eaten by the crocodile. Ma sees this and drops down the balcony and rushes to save Lil One along with Pa. Lil One runs towards his parents as Ma gets to open the hatch. However, Pa catches the airborne Lil One to the latter's disappointment. Granny shows up with the chainsaw and attempts to kill Renato, instead releasing the bear trap to the air which lands and sticks to her head. The crocodile dashes to Ma's hatch and Ma returns to experiencing discomfort. Ms. McBrisk appears looking for her pocketwatch and assumes it's left in the Crumpet house, then looks at Pa's costume and Granny wearing the bear trap. Ma walks away on her mission to "set free" the animal.

Outside in the next day, Triceps coaches Caprice and Pfff in exercise. As Granny shows up with the bear trap on her, Caprice and a returning Grownboy are amazed by her. Grownboy mentions that Ma's advice worked and that he and Steve agreed to be part of a ménage à trois. Looking for Renato, he finds his mother wearing the remains of Renato, including a dress, boots, and purse made from the crocodile's leather. This leads to his devastation resulting from the loss of his pet. After taking off Renato's head, Ma thanks Granny for the crocodile skinning book and realizes that McBrisk was right for encouraging Ma to release a wild beast from inside. Lil One tries entering the hatch again, but Pa, who dresses and yells like Tarzan, catches Ma on a swinging vine and the two cuddle on a tree as Grownboy continues to express grief.

## Trivia

* This episode was screened at the In the Palace International Short Film Festival on June 29, 2015 and Kinofest 2014.
* Grownboy also owns a crocodile named Renato in "Taxidermama".
* Pa wears his superhero costume again in "Va te catcher vilain !".

## References

1. ↑ http://archive.inthepalace.com/en/kids/programme/by\_day/programe\_hall-go/byhall/programe.hall1/2015-06-29
2. ↑ http://2014.kinofest.com/localhost/2014/en/off-en.html