Michelle Mallon

**Michelle Louisa Patricia Pio Mallon** is a former student at Our Lady Immaculate College, and James's cousin.

## History

Michelle lives in Derry, during The Troubles in Northern Ireland, with her mother. Her cousin, James, arrives from London to live with them. She attends Our Lady Immaculate College. Her brother, Niall, is in prison for murder. In 1998, she has a job as a cashier in Dennis's Wee Shop.

## Personality

Michelle swears frequently, drinks heavily, and talks a lot about her sexuality, leading to her being described as 'coarse'. She is a fiery, strong and bold character that isn't fazed by others' opinions of her. She can appear as aggressive and defensive, but remains loyal to those closest to her. She doesn’t care about rules and is the one who is mostly getting herself and her friends into trouble. She's hungry for attention, and is quick to do things if it means she can be popular or get on TV.

## Relationships

### Romantic

Artem/Clive - Michelle tries to seduce Artem, a Ukrainian exchange student from Chernobyl, at a house party, but discovers he is actually a Protestant from Belfast, named Clive, who fell asleep on the wrong bus back from the airport.

Harry - Michelle kisses Harry, a Protestant boy during the "Friends Across the Barricade" peace initiative weekend. She tries to have sex with him but he stops her, showing her he is wearing a purity bracelet.

Michelle took two dates to her school prom, one named Johnny, believing they would stay at opposite ends of the room and not meet. They eventually did and both left without her.

### Family

Deidre Mallon - mother

Martin Mallon - father

Niall Mallon - brother

James Maguire - cousin

Kathy Maguire - aunt

### Friendships

Erin Quinn - Erin and Michelle often get into arguments due to their opposite personalities. She shows contempt at Erin's writing and her pretentiousness. They are united by a love of boys and a hatred of Jenny Joyce.

Clare Devlin - Michelle sometimes looks down on Clare, making fun of her academically-driven personality and lack of sexuality, even peer-pressuring her into drinking alcohol. Despite this, she is happy for Clare's achievements and cheers her on after she is kissed by Laurie.

Orla McCool - Michelle is often exasperated at Orla's tendency to not understand things.

### Professional

Dennis - manager

Fionnula - the gang were tasked with cleaning Fionnula's kitchen, but failed miserably, setting fire to her curtain and trying to "clean" her windows with mayonnaise.

## Notes and Trivia

* The actress that portrays Michelle is from Derry.
* Jamie-Lee was unable to attend the Season 2 premiere, so fellow co-stars and creator Lisa McGee wore I ❤ JLO'D badges during the event.
* There is a mural in Derry, which features Jamie-Lee as Michelle.

## Memorable Quotes

"Genuine question: why can't you just be fucking normal?"
"Sláinte motherfuckers."
"Foreigners fucking love the Giant's Causeway."
"That's English for you, fucking savages."
"Big fan of the fandango."
"We didn't threaten her. We're not stupid. Big Mandy's her sister and she's half fucking gorilla."
"They ran out of spuds, everyone was raging."
"You wouldn't move over there James, I can't see past your massive closet."
"Do you reckon if I told him I had an incendiary device down my knickers he'd have a look?"
"You're a fucking Derry girl now, James."
"We're doing this for peace all right, piece of that fine Protestant ass."
"She went to England years ago to get an abortion, never came back. Didn't get the abortion either. Lucky for you, James, eh?"
"(On Hugh Grant) Have youse not heard? You know your man, floppy hair, English, he's all "fuck-a-doodle this, fuck-a-doodle that". He's flat out going to weddings with his mates, until one of them, the fat beardy one in the skirt, until he croaks it and they're all, "We need to show this man a bit of respect here. Let's stop all the clocks" He goes to your woman. You know her? She's a total ride but she paper-clips her frocks together. Well, he was caught getting down and dirty with some hooker in the back of his BMW. Dark horse or what?"