Barely, Indiana

***Barely, Indiana*** is the forty-first episode of *Off Book: The Improvised Musical,* and features guests Adal Rifai, Arnie Niekamp, and Matt Young, of the podcast Hello From the Magic Tavern. It follows a young Peace Militia recruit in his quest to rid his hometown of violent video games using diapers, reason, and time travel.

## Plot

### Act I

In the town of Gary, Indiana, a group of activists has formed a well-organized Peace Militia, and is seeking new recruits ("Piece of Peace"). Philip, a young resident drawn to the cause of peace, renounces his violent-video-game-playing ways, and musters the courage to enlist with the help of his friend Samantha. Initially unsure about the best ways to spread peace in society, he eventually comes to believe that the key is to regain a childlike innocence by living and acting like a baby ("Wave Your Peaceful Flag").

Nearby, at the local GameStop, three part-time employees are discussing their sales strategy. It seems that the recent emphasis on peace has caused a decline in Xbox sales, and the store's numbers are suffering. Together, they develop a plan to break into people's homes and force them to own the devices, encouraging more violence and, therefore, more video game spending ("Deus EXBoxica").

Philip returns home in search of his childhood things. His mother is delighted that her sweet boy wants to return to baby-hood; however, his 14-year-old brother, Tyler, is reluctant to give up the role of youngest child. They have an intense competition in the family living room ("Any Young You Can Go, I Can Go Younger"). Realizing that Philip will not be swayed, Tyler eventually accepts his responsibility as the new older brother.

At a lab across town, a group of scientists have been hard at work on a time portal. Frustrated by a lack of recognition by the greater scientific community, they long to have a major breakthrough ("Small Town Science"). Though the technology is currently only capable of sending people back to Elizabethan times, it shows great potential. Scientists Steve and Clyde believe they can use it to bring about a Michael Jackson-level event that will really put Gary, Indiana on the map. For lunch, the group orders chicken parm ("Gary, Indiana").

### Act II

Philip has returned to the center of town, ready to persuade the people of Gary to renounce violence. He makes his case while sitting in a car seat in a diaper, drinking from a sippy cup and babysplaining the meaning of peace to the people. At least four citizens are convinced by his impressive performance ("My Way Is the Best Way"). However, his excitement at this victory is cut short when Samantha tells him that she has found an unsolicited Xbox in her bedroom—an apparent attempt to undermine the cause of peace. The two friends realize that imitating babies is not the most effective strategy for changing hearts and minds, and decide to be more proactive.

Meanwhile, Scientist Clyde travels to Elizabethan England through the time portal. He happens to meet King Henry VIII, who intuits that he comes from the 21st century. He also meets a courtesan named Michael, son of Jack. The crowd, naturally, has many questions about the future, which he does his best to explain ("The Strokes"). He tries to convince Michael to return to the future with him in exchange for a chicken parm recipe, but negotiations down when he offends the people with his ignorance of Elizabethan food and diet. He returns to modern-day Gary, Indiana, empty-handed.

The GameStop employees have gathered again to discuss their plan's progress. However, they are interrupted by a customer looking for bird-related casual games for her child. They attempt to sell her an Xbox or some more violent games, but she is uninterested. Tyler enters the store, looking for a job. As a test, the part-time employees challenge him to sneak an Xbox into the bird-game customer's pocket without her knowing, which he does. The others are impressed by Tyler's apparent skill and intuition.

Clyde returns to the present in time for lunch. He relays his positive impressions of Elizabethan England to the other scientists. A confusion over pronunciation leads to an in-depth discussion of sexual mores and societal attitudes toward prostitution ("Let's Call the Whole Thing Sex Workers"). The scientists return to work.

Having revised their strategy, Philip and Samantha are now going door to door in an attempt to prevent people from receiving suspicious Xboxes. They bond over the activity, and find love in a pop-up Italian restaurant ("Finally in Love"). Now full of spaghetti, they continue their grass-roots campaign, and happen upon the house of Clyde, the time-traveling scientist. He tells them about the time portal, frustrated at what he feels is a useless technology. Samantha suggests using it to send all the Xboxes back to Elizabethan times, saving Gary and its residents from a violent fate. The three rush to the lab, where Clyde and the other scientists begin preparing ("Deus EXboxina").

Suddenly, the three GameStop employees and Tyler arrive at the lab, determined to foil the time-travel plan. Philip confronts Tyler, appealing to his sense of hometown pride and nostalgia. The group discusses the links between video games and violence, and acknowledge that the cause is probably insignificant in light of deeper, systemic issues. However, as it is the one idea anyone has had to reduce the violence, they decide to go with that.

The Xboxes are sent back to Elizabethan England, where a peasant named Malcolm discovers them. He shows the other peasants how to plug the consoles directly into the skin of livestock, which results in many injured or dead animals, but also changes the course of history. The common folk are inspired by the video games, rising up and overcoming the rigid class structure of the time. This leads to centuries of peace and, ultimately, a completely transformed town of Barely, Indiana ("76 Things/Plug and Play/Barely, Indiana [Finale]").

**Show/Hide**
## Musical Cast

### Jessica McKenna

* Sandy, Peace Militia recruiter
* Samantha, Philip's girlfriend
* Barb, Philip's mom
* Scientist's assistant
* Townsperson convinced by rattle
* Elizabethan peasant woman
* GameStop customer looking for bird-related casual games

### Arnie Niekamp

* Bystander who likes money but not fruit
* Todd from GameStop
* Tyler, Philip's younger brother
* Unnamed scientist #1
* Townsperson convinced by babysplaining
* Courtesan Michael, son of Jack
* Homeowner waiting for a crock-pot
* Restaurant server

### Zach Reino

* Phil, Peace Militia recruiter
* Chad, a bystander who also loves money and hates fruit
* Unnamed GameStop employee
* Darryl, Philip's father, and head of Microsoft
* Clyde, a scientist
* Townsperson convinced by sippy cup
* Pete the mailman
* Restaurant spaghetti cook
* Elizabethan video game enthusiast

### Adal Rifai

* Factory worker recruit
* Bystander impressed by wearing diapers
* Ralph from GameStop
* Grandpa, Philip's grandpa
* Steve, a scientist who makes others uncomfortable
* Townsperson convinced by Philip's vision
* Malcolm, the English peasant who discovers video games
* Restaurant host
* Ben, a fiddle player

### Matt Young

* Lead Peace Militia recruiter
* Philip, member of the Peace Militia
* GameStop customer looking for Funko Pop and Disney Infinity figures
* Unnamed scientist #2
* King Henry VIII

## Songs

* "Piece of Peace" (4:26)
* "Wave Your Peaceful Flag" (7:24)
* "Deus EXBoxica" (12:02)
* "Any Young You Can Go, I Can Go Younger" (15:48)
* "Small Town Science" (20:49)
* "Gary, Indiana" (25:27)
* "My Way Is the Best Way" (28:19)
* "The Strokes" (35:39)
* "Let's Call the Whole Thing Sex Workers" (45:11)
* "Finally in Love" (47:44)
* "Deus EXBoxina" (53:11)
* "76 Things/Plug and Play/Barely, Indiana (Finale)" (57:00)

Closing Song:

* "Clear Eyes, Full Hearts, Can't Lose (Ha-Lose Ha-Lose Ha-Lose)" (Magic Tavern Song) (1:02:38)