RQG 147 - The Dungeon Master

## Summary

Azu, Cel, Hamid, Zolf and Skraak fight Shoin's giant pipe-organ machine in Shoin's underwater base.

Zolf punts, Azu is ready for redemption, Hamid fires off his last slot, and Cel tries to stack the odds.

## Synopsis

The party is fighting the giant pipe-organ machine in Shoin’s underwater lair. The machine still contains part of the pipe organ, and has a glass dome with a brain around where normally the bottom of its neck would be. It is asymmetrical, with one arm longer than the other, and has significant amounts of machinery built into it.

Zolf kills the blob next to him and flies 5 ft into the air using his boots of levitation, and is able to move by using his glaive to punt himself around. Cel calls to him excitedly when they see this, telling him they are ‘air buddies’. Azu kills the two blobs next to her and then waits to see if any more blobs will fall down. As more blobs drop into the room, Hamid casts fireball at them and at the giant machine. Although he kills all the blobs caught in the explosion, the machine appears unaffected. Cel, about 15 ft in the air, is eye level with the machine.

The pipe organ creature has quite a bulbous torso and long, thin limbs. In its right arm Cel can see that it has some kind of firing mechanism, probably something that can attack at range. On its left hand it has something extremely sharp built into it, appearing almost claw-based. It also has a lot of fluids coursing through its machinery, with almost half of the liquid that was in the cylinders running through it in some way.

Cel reloads their crossbow, and the pipe-organ creature moves towards them and hits them twice with its claw hand. As it does so, fluid pumps out of its arm onto the claw, but Cel manages to avoid it. The fluid seems viscous and gel-like.

Zolf casts doom on the creature, but it has no effect. Azu determines that the machine is evil, and charges it, hitting it with her ax for a massive amount of damage. Even more blobs fall down from the ceiling, and one of them starts crawling up the wall towards Skraak. Hamid moves towards Zolf and kills two blobs by casting scorching ray, and meanwhile Cel flies up and away from the monster. Hamid, Zolf and Cel are almost all directly above or below each other.

The machine turns towards Hamid, Zolf and Cel and then twists its arm awkwardly and fires off a bomb at Zolf, which explodes but fails to hit Hamid and Cel. It steps away from Azu. Zolf punts himself towards it, and it attacks him as he comes near, but fails to hit him. Zolf swipes at it with his glaive but his weapon glances off the metal. Azu attacks it twice, but her axe also glances off.

More blobs fall down from the ceiling, and Hamid moves away from the closest blobs near him and draws and loads his crossbow. Cel vomits up a swarm of spiders, which proceed to crawl all over the machine, but it seems completely unphased by it, apparently not harming it in any way. Skraak runs towards the electrified door on the walkway.

The machine angles towards Azu and attacks her twice, smacking her roughly with one arm and also shooting out some type of goo, which fails to hit her. It then backhands her with its flaming other arm. Zolf moves towards Azu and tries to heal her, but is backhanded by the machine as he does so and he loses his concentration on the spell, which flickers and fails.

The machine looks quite beat up. Azu attacks it twice, hitting it once and dealing a decent amount of damage. Two blobs draw nearer Zolf, and he kills them both with his glaive. Hamid puts away his crossbow and drinks his potion of greater invisibility. Cel uses their crossbow to kill two blobs near Azu and Zolf. The spider swarm moves away from the machine into the room.

While Skraak is doing something that nobody else can make out, the machine attacks Azu twice, backhanding her once and spraying icy cold mist into her face. Azu attacks it, smashing one of the fluid chambers in its leg - the machine now looks heavily damaged. Azu’s second attack glances off the metal. Zolf attacks it with his flaming glaive but fails to do any damage. All the blobs move towards the spider swarm, except for two which are still climbing up towards Skraak.

Hamid, invisible, moves up beside Azu. Unknown and unseen, he unleashes a breath of pure rage in a desperate attempt to save his friends, because he can see how badly beaten they are. The dragon breath begins, and the machine has enough time to turn and reach towards and try to swipe at Hamid. As it is reaching out, the fire breath begins destroying it, bits off it breaking away, and it cannot get either attack off. It falters and falls down, the breath still going until all that is left is a charred husk of mundane material popping and burning in a pile.

## Quotes

**Ben**: "Go, go boots, go! I go 5 foot into the air."
**Alex**: "Everything got very vertical very quickly."
**Ben**: "Yeah! I get 5 ft into the air for two reasons. One, I threaten the square below me. Two, I can punt myself around!"
**Everyone**: (*bursts out laughing*)
―Zolf begins to levitate.

**Alex**: "Hamid, you are up."
**Bryn**: "Hehehehehehe!"
―It's Hamid's turn in the intiative order.

**Alex**: "Bryn is taking his internal tally of kills for this one."
**Helen**: "Someone’s been adding them all up!"
**Lydia**: "Oh, Hamid has killed so many more."
**Alex**: "Yeah, by the end of this encounter Hamid’s basically done a small world war."
―Hamid kills the blobs.

**Bryn**: "But now-- but now I haven’t rolled the damage…"
**Alex**: "I know!"
**Bryn**: "We can’t know!"
**Alex**: "I’ve given you proper fireball bluedice!"
**Bryn**: "We can’t know how much damage I did!"
**Alex**: "We know how much damage you did, *nothing at all. Nothing at all.*"
**Bryn**: "That’s not true, I did absolute minimum 20 damage."
**Alex**: "Would you like to roll it just to know how much damage that fireball did?"
**Bryn**: "No! I’m not going to."
―Hamid casts fireball on the blobs and Shoin.

**Ben**: "I then cast ‘Doom’ on the monster."
**Alex**: "Dooooom."
**Ben**: "It causes it to become shaken -"
**Lydia**: "It runs an old game, proving its emulating capacity."
―Zolf attacks Shoin.

"I’m going to take you down."
―**Azu, to the machine.**

**Ben**: "The other benefit is that you gain a deflective bonus equal to your charisma mod to your AC against attacks made by the target of the smite!"
**Helen**: "...Can you explain to me what the f\*\*\* that means?"
―Game mechanics discussion.

"I’m not saying I built an encounter that would finally allow Azu to redeem herself, but I have built an encounter that will allow Azu to redeem herself. I’m just saying… or die trying!"
―**Alex**

**Helen and Bryn, simultaneously**: "That’s 37 to hit!"
**Alex**: "Ehh… let me check…. still checking…. Ah, that is - that *is* a hit."
―Azu attacks the machine.

**Bryn**: "Ohoh! 37 damage as well!"
**Helen**: "*Yes!*"
**Alex**: "I was genuinely like, ‘this might be a bit much… is it a bit much? Maybe it’s a bit much… nah, it’ll be fine.’"
**Ben**: "Paladins. This is a paladin working as a paladin."
**Bryn**: "Azu is at full power and ready to lay some *whoop-ass!*"
―Azu hits Shoin.

**Alex**: "... Quite a lot of damage on a hit."
**Lydia**: "You know, 37 *is* quite a lot of damage on a hit, isn’t it Alex?! I wonder who -- who might be aware of that?! Hmm! It’s quite a lot! Thanks a lot for that!"
―Cel took 37 damage a few rounds ago.

"With the possible exception of Zolf, resources have really depleted - if only someone could just hit something hard over and over and over again until the cows come home. *If only that was an option.*"
―**Alex**

**Ben**: "I’ve got loads of hitpoints."
**Helen**: "Stop saying that."
**Ben**: "*No.*"
―Zolf has loads of hitpoints.

**Alex**: "I need d6 please."
**Ben**: "We’ve used them all up to be standing on!"
**Helen**: "Oh, here’s one."
**Alex**: "More D6 please. There are two, there. Can I have them. I *want*. *I want them, precious!* Thank you."
**Lydia**: "That was a worryingly good Gollum."
―Alex needs to roll damage.

**Alex**: "Also, for anyone who’s tracking like enemies and combats and how much damage and so on - this is a bad day for people. This is… a lot of maths."
**Helen**: "Yeah, this is - this is stupid."
**Ben**: "It’s a nightmare."
**Helen**: "Don’t bother."
―Big F for whoever wrote up this episode.

**Alex**: "Big-Bad Big-Bad angles itself downwards, swarming in spiders, and tries to punch Azu into a small puddle."
**Helen**: "Azu looks up at it defiantly. She may then get puddled, but I want you to know that she was defiant."
―Shoin attacks Azu.

**Helen**: "Oh… I’m going to get hurt. *Ohhh…*"
**Ben**: "You *should* be alright."
**Alex**: "Oh, that’s wrong! I’m rolling the wrong dice."
**Helen**: (*laughs*)
**Alex**: "I need bigger dice!"
**Helen and Lydia**: "*Nooo!*"
**Ben**: "...You *should* be alright."
**Helen**: "...Should! *Should be*, Ben!"
―Azu gets hit by the machine.

"They’re like, “I’m going to blob these spiders!” and the spiders are like: “Nom nom nom nom.”"
―**Ben, when Cel vomits spiders**

**Alex**: "In which case then; Big Bad Beefy Boy!"
**Helen**: "Kills me."
**Ben**: "We *might* not die."
**Alex**: "I would like to know how many hitpoints you’re on."
**Helen**: "28"
**Ben**: "39"
**Lydia**: "Zolf *might* live."
―Azu and Zolf are in danger of dying during the fight.

**Alex**: "Hamid, you are up."
**Bryn**: "Hamid…"
**Alex**: "Unseen by all."
**Bryn**: "Invisible…"
**Ben**: "*Come on, Hamid.*"
**Bryn**: "...breathes dragon fire."
**Lydia**: (*squeals*)
**Ben**: "No, we need to see if this happens - it’s not a spell!"
**Bryn**: "Spell resistance... *does not apply.*"
**Ben**: "*God!* Ehhh-daslkdlskd*sd-ssdsss*...!"
**Alex**: "Good. *Very* good. It’s greater invisibility, thus your invisibility will not stop -"
**Bryn**: "- will not be broken."
**Alex**: "- once the attack is up."
**Bryn**: "Also, it gets no Reflex save - it is not aware of me."
**Alex**: "This is a correct statement."
**Bryn**: "This is *full* damage."
**Ben**: "BRYN!"
**Bryn**: "Unless it’s got fire resistance."
**Ben**: "Bryn, *you absolute diamond!*"
**Alex**: "Ben -- Ben’s just-"
**Ben**: "DO IT A KILL!"
**Alex**: "Ben’s getting giddy!"
**Ben**: "DO IT A KILL!"
**Bryn**: "Also, it’s hitting four of the blobs behind it?"
**Helen, laughing**: "*Alright!* No need to show off!"
**Bryn**: "I breathe fire in a straight line."
**Ben**: "DO IT A KILL!"
―Hamid deals the killing blow.

**Ben**: "Alex, can you - we’ve got 6, and 6, and 6--"
**Alex**: "NO! I can’t do that - that’s not a skill I have. I’m tracking many other things simultaneously!"
―Hamid breathes dragonfire.

**Ben**: "How much - how many hitpoints are you on?"
**Helen**: "Five."
**Ben**: "Ok, so it would have killed you next round."
**Helen**: "Yes."
**Ben**: "Outright."
**Helen**: "I was beginning to mourn."
―Azu was closer to death than we thought.

**Alex**: "The third thing is that it is... *Dead.*"
**Helen**: "Thank God."
**Alex**: "Quite… dead."
**Helen**: "Thank Bryn. *Thank Bryn* for that!"
―The machine dies.

"Can I just say that I view this as an attempted murder."
―**Helen, about Azu almost dying.**

"I’m sorry guys, I know we wanted him for questioning, but eh… seemed like the best choice!"
―**Hamid**
## Dice rolls and Mechanics

* Cel Reflex save to avoid the fluid pumping from Shoin’s arm: 17 (success)
* Azu Reflex save to avoid Shoin’s goo: Natural 20 (24, success)

## Combat Breakdown

**Combat continued from previous episode, ongoing effects:**

* Cel: Has their beastmorph mutagen active. They gain +2 AC, their charisma takes a -2 penalty and their constitution gains a +4 bonus, making their new max hp 59. They gain bat wings (fly speed of 30ft), darkvision, +2 on Intimidate, two claw attacks, and a bite attack.
* Azu: Ironbeard, +1 to AC, and bull's strength, +4 to Strength.
* Zolf: Allies within 50 ft get +1 to attacks and saves against fear effects from bless.

**Initiative:** Zolf (22), Azu (16), Blobs, Hamid (nat 1; 9), Cel (nat 1; 5), Skraak, Shoin machine

**Round 3**

* Zolf: Attacks one of the blobs next to him: 18 (doesn’t roll damage, automatically kills it). He then activates the boots of levitation to fly 5 ft into the air, and he uses his glaive to punt his way around the room.
* Azu: Takes a 5 ft step and attacks both blobs next to her: 23 (doesn’t roll damage, automatically kills it), ? (is dead). She then waits to see if any more blobs fall from the ceiling near her.
* Blobs: Move 10 feet closer to the nearest person, and six more blobs drop into the room from above.
* Hamid: Moves towards Zolf, towards the electrified door and away from the blobs. He casts his last fireball on ten of the blobs and on Shoin. The blast doesn’t affect Shoin, but he kills all of the blobs (no roll, but would deal a minimum of 20 damage).
* Cel: Is 15 ft up in the air, about eye level with the Shoin machine. Cel takes a 5 ft flap away from the machine and then reloads their crossbow.
* Skraak: Climbs to the top of the walkway, and uses his second move action to move along it in the direction of the doors.
* Shoin machine: Moves 30 ft forward towards Cel and reaches up with its claw hand to swipe at Cel: Hits them twice for a total of 37 damage. It also pumps fluid unto the claw as it hits Cel, but Cel manages to avoid it (Reflex save: 17).

**Round 4**

* Zolf: Moves 10 ft towards Azu and the machine, and then casts doom on the monster. The spell fails.
* Azu: Activates smite evil against the Shoin machine, giving her +3 to attack rolls, +8 on damage rolls and +3 to AC against it. She then charges it: 37 (37 damage).
* Blobs: Six new blobs fall into the room, and all the blobs move 10 feet towards the closest person. One of the blobs begins to climb the wall up to Skraak.
* Hamid: Moves towards Zolf and is almost underneath him, and he then casts scorching ray at two of the blobs, instantly killing them.
* Cel: Withdraws, going up 10 feet and then 15 feet to the side, away from the machine. Cel is now almost above Zolf, although 25 feet higher.
* Skraak: Readies an action.
* Shoin machine: focuses on Hamid, Zolf and Cel and it fires off a bomb towards Zolf and hits him with 23 electrical damage. The explosion fails to hit Hamid or Cel. The machine then 5ft steps away from Azu.

**Round 5**

* Zolf: Punts 10 feet towards the machine, and as he comes near, the machine takes a swing at him but misses. Zolf attacks it with his glaive: 20 (miss).
* Azu: Attacks the machine twice: Natural 1 (miss); 18 (miss)
* Blobs: Move 10 feet closer to the nearest person, and 6 more fall from the ceiling.
* Hamid: Moves away from the blobs closest to him and draws and loads his crossbow.
* Cel: Vomits a swarm of spiders below them. The spiders move 20 feet towards the machine and begin to swarm it, but it appears to have no effect on the machine. Cel moves further away.
* Skraak: Runs towards the electrified door along the walkway.
* Shoin machine: Angles downwards and punches Azu twice: 33 damage + 4 fire damage (Azu makes a reflex save: Natural 20; 24).

**Round 6**

* Zolf: Uses a 5ft 'step' towards Azu and casts cure serious wounds on her (24 HP). However, as he does so, the machine gets an attack of opportunity and hits him for 19 damage + 6 fire damage. Zolf loses his concentration and the spell fails.
* Azu: Attacks the machine twice: Natural 1 (fail), 28 (19 damage).
* Blobs: No more fall into the room. The remaining blobs move towards the closest people. Two of them move towards Zolf, and he takes attacks of opportunity at both of them and kills them.
* Hamid: Puts his crossbow away and drinks a potion of greater invisibility.
* Cel: Shoots their crossbow at the blobs nearest Zolf and Azu: 24 (5 damage), 18 (minimum 2, is dead), Natural 20 (8 damage, is dead). Cel moves the spider swarm 20 feet away from the machine. Cel flies away from Hamid’s last position.
* Skraak: Does something that nobody notices.
* Shoin machine: Attacks Azu twice: 21 (miss), ? (hits; 19 damage + 4 cold damage)

**Round 7**

* Zolf: Holds his action until after Azu’s turn.
* Azu: Attacks the machine twice: 33 (28 damage), 18 (miss)
* Zolf inserts his action, attacking the machine twice with his glaive: 12 (miss), 11 (miss)
* Blobs: All the blobs advance. All of them head towards the spiders, except for two which are crawling up towards Skraak.
* Hamid: Invisible, moves up beside Azu and uses his dragon breath weapon on the machine and the blobs behind it: 54 fire damage (5 kills; the machine and 4 blobs behind the machine).