Heavy is Dead but it's BlazBlue and Noel has Mario's Voice

* Original
* Latin Spanish Dub

**Heavy is Dead but it's BlazBlue and Noel has Mario's Voice** is the twenty-ninth episode of TheGamerLover's Mematic Universe.

## Plot

The video starts with Noel entering the THOT Patrol's police department with a cheerful song, then she comes up to the camera saying "It is a good day to not be dead!" in italian gibberish before she was shot in the head by Tsubaki, who says "POW You are dead."

Noel goes into a dramatic pose and yelling "I am dead!" in italian gibberish, Tsubaki then does an evil chuckle at the downed Noel. Ragna conga dances in as Tsubaki throws away the murder weapon quickly to hide the evidence. Ragna then sees Noel on the ground and is shocked. He then says "Noel is dead!" The somewhat dead Noel says "Yes, I am dead!" in italian gibberish.

Ragna then asks Tsubaki why Noel is dead. Tsubaki responds with an "I dunno." Noel then tries to tell Ragna that Tsubaki killed her in italian gibberis, but instead they both shushed her and reminded her that she is dead. She then says "Alrighty!" and then rag-dolled into the ground screaming.

Then Kagura Mutsuki shows up and was ready to say his entry line before noticing Noel in the ground. He asks Ragna and Tsubaki "What the bloody hell just happened!?" They tell him that Noel is dead. A quiz pops up when Kagura says "Noel is dead!?" Ragna then points at Kagura and says "Correct!" as the answer box flashes. Kagura makes a victorious expression after the quiz.

Ragna then asks the two if they have seen the murderer. They then say no sorry to Ragna. He slams Aramasa on the floor and does an epic promise "I will find him, I will capture him, and no one will ever die again!" The other members, including Noel, clap at the end of the epic speech by Ragna.

Then Hakumen comes in to notice Noel is dead, Ragna then says "We know!", Hakumen asks who killed her, Ragna responds with "We don't know!". Hakumen then decides to find clues. He then finds the pistol Tsubaki used to kill Noel and tells the group that the weapon is how Noel died, much to everyone's shock.

Celica then flies in and moves her friends out of the way to kiss Noel on the nose. Noel rises up and starts inflating like a balloon, Hakumen arrives and pops her with his sword. Celica gives her medical opinion by saying that Noel is dead.

Ragna then asks his mother what happened, Celica then tells them that Noel was killed. The THOT Patrol officers then huddle together as Celica walks near Noel and tells them it's nothing to worry about as both her and Noel smiles to each other. Kagura then asks "Now what?" as Platinum the Trinity clipidy Clops in and tells everyone that Noel is dead and mockingly asks for their opinion. Ragna angrily tells Platinum to go home.

After an awkward silence, Platinum goes outside annoyed that she had to be sent home but a car crashes on her off-screen, ending with the autistic girl's life. Ragna then tells everyone to get back to the point. Noel then looks at her corpse and tells them that she is dead in italian gibberish. They all yell "Noel is dead!?" and immediately Celica runs up to heal Noel, but flies to a corner upon impact with an explosion.

Noel then gets annoyed and asks who killed her in italian gibberish. Then Kokonoe appears drinking out of her bottle and burping, saying that she killed Noel, she then shoots Kagura Mutsuki and says that it was a joke. Everyone except Celica laughed shortly as Kokonoe points at Tsubaki saying that she killed Noel, Tsubaki was shocked and asked how she knew. Kokonoe responds saying "I didn't, that was a joke too." As she was burping along. Kokonoe then fells from a caffeine overdose, and Tsubaki lets out an evil laugh and admits that she is the one who killed Noel as she reveals that she was Dark Tsubaki all along.

Ragna calls her a monster and Noel asks why in italian gibberish. Dark Tsubaki insults her by calling her fat and other insults as they are arguing. Ragna looks right at them and then closes his eyes shrugging with the text "Its Tradition." Then Noel yells at Dark Tsubaki and she tells her to f\*\*k off with the middle finger. She says to Noel that she is dead, but Noel says "No, YOU!" and uses her gun to shoot Dark Tsubaki in the head.

Noel then says Heavy's famous "you are dead, not big surprise" line. Ragna walks off to the gate as he witnessed an idiotic event and then erases himself from existence. Noel then proclaims that she is alive in italian gibberish. After an awkward silence, she says in italian gibberish "Yes, this is stupid."

## Transcript

**Noel**: (Singing) Lalala hmhm-hmmm! Apiparapeiparapapurupupu! Wee-hee! (*yah dah yadayahla! It is good day to be not DED.*)

**Tsubaki**: Pow! You are ded!

**Noel**: \*Coughing\* Bloop Bloop! (*I am dead!*)

**Tsubaki**: Heheheheheh

*As she laughs, Ragna pass by*

**Ragna**: Pampomparompompom

**Tsubaki**: Aw shucks.

**Ragna**: Oh! Noel is dead!

**Noel**: The horror. Arrivadercci. (*[ S P A G H E T T I ]. I am dead!*)

**Ragna**: Why is Noel dead?!

**Tsubaki**: I dunno.

**Noel**: Ototereteito (*I think it was-*)

**Tsubaki and Ragna**: Shhh, you are dead!

**Noel**: Alrighty! (**Ok**) MAAAAAAAAAAAAMAAAAAAMAAAAAAAAAAAAA...!

*Kagura Mutsuki appears*

**Kagura**: What's up, you wankas?! Who’s up for a- AH! What the- bloody hell just happened?!

**Tsubaki and Ragna**: Noel is dead!

**Kagura**: Noel is dead!?

**Ragna**: Correct!

*Yay!*

**Ragna**: So, did you see the murderer?

**Tsubaki and Kagura**: No, sorry mate.

**Ragna**: I will find him, I will capture him, and no one will ever die again!

*Kagura, Noel and Tsubaki smiles and claps*

**Tsubaki**: Ah, well that’s nice.

**Kagura**: I am DAMN proud right now.

*Hakumen appears*

**Hakumen**: Atteeeeeeeeention! (Runs) Noel is dead!

**Ragna**: We know!

**Hakumen**: Who killed her?!

**Ragna**: We don’t know!

**Hakumen**: I will find clues!

*Hakumen starts sneaking, Tsubaki shows a worried expression, then he finds the gun she used to kill Noel*

**Hakumen**: What's that? A WEAPUN?! That thing is why Noel is dead!

**Ragna, Tsubaki and Kagura**: Noel is dead?!

**Noel**: (at the same time) Kotapaperu?! (*Noel is dead?!*)

**Hakumen**: Yes! (slams hands on desk) She died!

**Ragna, Tsubaki and Kagura**: HOAOH!!

*Far away, can be hear Celica screaming as she flies near Ragna and friends*

**Celica**: Incoming! (crashes with the wall and falls, then jumps to where Noel's corpse is) Raus, raus! MOVE, NOW!

*Celica kisses Noel in the nose, then Noel gets up happily but starts inflating like a balloon, much to Celica's shock*

**Noel**: (inflating) AAAAAAAAAAHH-HAHAHAHA-! (Hakumen pops her with his sword and leaves)

**Celica**: In my medical opinion, Noellie is dead!

**Ragna**: Celica, what happened?

**Celica**: My professional opinion? (slams her depressed face on the desk) Noellie was killed!

**Kagura**: OH GOD!!

*Everyone panics, then Celica comes near Noel*

**Celica**: I don’t think it’s anything to worry about.

*Both Celica and Noel smiles, then Kagura speaks*

**Kagura**: Well, now what?

*Platinum the Trinity appears*

**Platinum**: Clippitty clop motherfucker!

**Ragna**: Oh come on!

**Noel**: NOOOOOOOOOOOO...!!

**Platinum**: Look at this! The freaking flat-chested sidekick is dead! (everyone looks at Platinum disappointed, except Celica who is just worried about her) What do you think of that?

**Ragna**: Uh.

**Hakumen**: Yes, yes, Platinum the Trinity.

**Platinum**: Yea?

**Ragna**: Go home!

*There's an awkward silence*

**Platinum**: Ah come on! Pffff! Freaking unbelievable seriously, you all suck!

*Outside the HQ, Platinum gets hit by a car and dies off-screen*

**Platinum**: (O-S) AAAAH!!

**Ragna**: Ok, let’s get back to the point!

*Noel examinates herself*

**Noel**: Butasomokapurufroteilo. (*I think Noel is dead.*)

**All**: Noel is dead!?

**Celica**: Noellie is dead!? (Gasps and runs) Noellie! I will heal you-!

*Celica steps on something explosive and is sent flying to a corner*

**Noel**: Bloo! Kotapaperusoropeparapupurukame?! (*Oh, Seriously?! Who killed Noel?!*)

*Kokonoe's mouth is seen drinking a Pepsi bottle*

**Kokonoe**: It was ME!

**All**: OOF!

**Kokonoe**: Yes! (chugs the bottle) I did it like this! (pulls out a gun and shoots Kagura)

**Kagura**: PWAAARGH!! (Dies as his body flies hitting Celica)

*Everyone looks at Kagura's death in shock*

**Kokonoe**: Woop-dee-doo!! (chugs the bottle and burps) That’s a joke, lads.

**All except Celica**: \*laugh track\*

*Kokonoe chugs and burps again*

**Kokonoe**: It was… yo-\*BURP\*... Her!

**All except Tsubaki**: OOF!

**Tsubaki**: How did you know?!

**Kokonoe**: I didn’t. \*Burps\* That was a joke too.

*Tsubaki starts laughing as the screen turns black around her*

**Kokonoe**: (falls) Oh, I’m dead.

**Tsubaki**: mhm, HAHAHA!

**Dark Tsubaki**: (as she reveals herself) That’s right! It was me!

**Ragna**: You monster!

**Noel**: NOOOOOOOOOOOO...!! (*But whyyyyy?*)

**Dark Tsubaki**: Cause you’re fat, gorl. And another thing, you’re ugly.

*Both Noel and Dark Tsubaki argues, Ragna stops worrying as this is normal for him*

**Dark Tsubaki**: (O-S) In the name of justice. There you are. Thoht! You're mine! Huh! Standing down. Hah! Not quite. Use-!

**Noel**: oooooooylyaylioolilylioooyyoyblibliyoooy laA yeeee MAAEAAM MALEEMAmmmMALEELAALAALiolelAllAleuyybyooyoy MAAAAAAAMAAAAAAMMMAAAAAAAAMMMM!!! (*Dark Tsubaki, stop! DARK TSUBAKI, YOU ARE SO MEAN! It's not funny! 🅳🅰🆁🅺 ​ 🆃🆂🆄🅱🅰🅺🅸!!)*

**Dark Tsubaki**: Ah dammit Noel, FUCK off! You are dead.

**Noel**: No u, POW! Yeah! Hahahah! You are dead! Not big surprise.

**Ragna**: well that was idiotic, off to erase myself. Watch and lear- (erases himself from existence as Hikari no Mukou e plays really fast)

**Noel**: Beautiful! That's-a so nice! (awkward silence) Oohhh. (*I am alive! Is nice. Yes this is stupid.*)

## Characters

* Noel Vermillion
* Dark Tsubaki Yayoi (Dies)
* Tsubaki Yayoi (Disguise)
* Ragna the Bloodedge (Dies)
* Kagura Mutsuki (First appearance, dies)
* Hakumen
* Celica Ayatsuki Mercury
* Platinum the Trinity (Dies off-screen)
* Kokonoe Mercury (First appearance)

## Songs used

* Combat - Warhammer: Shadow of the Horned Rat OST
* Hikari no Mukou e - BlazBlue Centralfiction OST

## Trivia

* This is the first shitpost to get a dub.