Here Comes the Bribe

**Here Comes the Bribe** is the ninth episode of season four of *The Cleveland Show*. It is the ninety seventh episode, overall.

## Synopsis

Cleveland and Donna renew their wedding vows for Valentine's Day. Meanwhile, Junior's mini-fridge, "Perry" stops working and he organizes a funeral for it.

## Plot

After watching an Oprah Valentine's special, Donna gets the idea to renew and recite their own wedding vows. Following the guys advice, Cleveland infuriates her by writing his true feelings instead of something romantic. Refusing his apology, Donna drags Cleveland to marriage counseling. But after the counselor appears to side with Donna he makes it clear that Cleveland can swing the "treatments" in his favor for extra money. Cleveland quickly writes a check and the counselor asks Donna to bend to Cleveland's wishes for a while. Cleveland proceeds to abuse his position with Donna until the doctor demands Cleveland sleeps with his wife and threatens blackmail if Cleveland doesn't give in. Telling the guys, they advise him to give in. At the doctor's house, the wife is enthusiastic but Cleveland resists and admits he loves Donna only to find it was a set up to get him to really admit his love.

Meanwhile, Junior's beloved refrigerator, "Perry," dies and Rallo helps him hold a funeral. But Junior later finds it in Rallo's room and Rallo tells him it was just the outlet that went bad. Junior demands his property but Rallo points out that it that it is now legally his and appeals to Junior's sense of justice. Later, Rallo goes further and sets it up as a hotel-style mini-bar in Junior's room and intends to charge Junior for using it. Junior tries to resist by buying his own snacks but finds the trip is more difficult that he imagined. Junior gives in and soon finds he owes over $1300. Rallo suggests he quit eating but the food seems to find Junior no matter what. Junior finds a loophole that the food isn't for resale and threatens Rallo with a crime without returning the fridge to his control and placing a fake part in his hair like Arnold Drummand.

Cleveland closes the episode by noting that there is nothing funny about marriage counseling in that it costs a lot of money and they always side with the wife as he wishes the audience a happy Valentine's Day.

## Characters

### Major Roles

* Cleveland Brown
* Donna Tubbs-Brown
* Dr. Fist
* Amber Fist
* Cleveland Junior
* Rallo Tubbs
* Perry

### Minor Roles

* Roberta Tubbs
* Rock Hudson
* Tim the Bear
* Lester Krinklesac
* Holt Richter
* Reverend Jenkins
* Arianna the Bear
* Fern Stapleton
* Kendra Krinklesac (Cameo)
* Gus (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Walt (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Julius (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Murray Rollenstein (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Cecelia Moreno (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Mayor Larry Box (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Cy the Sighing Bi Guy (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Gretel (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Gunther (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Gary (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Dee Dee Tubbs (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Choni Moreno (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Ernie Krinklesac (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Yvette (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Arch (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Principal Farquhare (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Lloyd Waterman (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* LeVar Brown (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Evelyn Brown (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Arianna the Bear (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Terry Kimple (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Paul Kimple (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Peter Griffin (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Lois Griffin (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Bonnie Swanson (Non-Speaking Cameo)
* Joe Swanson (Non-Speaking Cameo)

## Quotes

**Donna**: Oprah was doing a show about renweing your wedding vows. She said a renewal ceremony can strengthen an marriage.
**Cleveland**: Orphan who's never been married said that?

**Rallo**: I'll go get Roberta and a few other ancillary characters.

**Junior**: So now, when someone prank calls me and asks if my refridgerator's running, I will sadly tell them "Not anymore."

**Kendra**: Nobody should have to bury their fridge.

**Lester**: Why are you bringing all those rainbow weeds in here?
**Cleveland**: They're flowers, Lester.

**Holt**: Dude, you're a little high strung. You wanna take off your shirt and I'll give you a massage? Not gay if other dudes are watching.
**Cleveland**: Alright, you heard him. None of you may look away.

**Rallo**: It was abandoned property and as such, all ownership rights are extinguished. I cite the precedent set by "finders keepers vs. losers weepers".

**Roberta**: I look better than my mama.
**Donna**: Don't you pimp on me, bitch! This is my day!

**Reverend Jenkins**: We are gathered here today for an unnecessary repetition of a once in a lifetime event and to make matters worse, I'm told you've written your own vows.

**Cleveland**: I, Cleveland, in the spirit of making our union greater and our love stronger, do solemnly vow the following: I vow not to interfere with your kitchen duties. I'm not good at it and don't like it. You, however, have proven how much you enjoy it, night after night, by cooking my meals and then washing the dishes. On that note, let's make a promise to not just fill a bowl with water to quote "let it soak" but let's you wash that bowl to completion, dry it, and put it away.
**Donna**: What?
**Cleveland**: I vow to keep guys night sacred. Two to every nights a week and by doing so, I will come back a better husband, relaxed from alcohol and ready to do you just right. *[click click, whistle]* I vow for us never again to watch TV together. You just jabber through the shows anyway and you never understand what's happening. If you would stop jabbering, you'd know. You're my dream. You always have been. I love you.

**Cleveland**: Now, what was wrong with that? I started the vow, promising a greater union and ended it with "I love you!"
**Roberta**: Cleveland, you idiot! It was all of the insults in between. When it comes to compliment sandwiches, that was a Dagwood.
**Junior**: I'd still eat it.

**Donna**: Cleveland, a phoned-in apology is not gunna be enough this time.
**Cleveland**: This is the 21st century. It won't be phoned in. I'm faxing it.
*[Cleveland faxes in an apology]*
**Cleveland**: Donna, you have a fax.

**Donna**: That's how you see our marriage? A bunch of constant annoyances.
**Cleveland**: That's a trick question. If I say "yes" you'll get mad and if I say "no", I'm lying.
## Trivia

* The title of this episode is a pun on the fan-made, but more popularized lyric "Here Comes the Bride", from the famous wedding song, "*Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring*".
	+ Holt performs this song, during Cleveland and Donna's wedding renewal.
* Donna lists her friends as the main female characters of *Downton Abbey*, but for some reason includes the recurring character, Lavinia Swire.
* Junior naming his refrigerator "Perry" is a nod to former Chicago Bears football player William "The Refrigerator" Perry.
* Rallo breaks the fourth wall, by calling Roberta, Rock Hudson, and a few others, "ancillary characters".
* Attendees of Perry's funeral:
	+ Rallo Tubbs
	+ Roberta Tubbs
	+ Rock Hudson
	+ Kendra Krinklesac
	+ Walt
	+ Julius
	+ Murray Rollenstein
	+ Cecelia Moreno
	+ Mayor Larry Box
	+ Cy the Sighing Bi Guy
	+ Gretel
	+ Gunther
	+ Gary
* Junior sings the beginning of "*Amazing Grace*", when giving Perry his eulogy.
* Kendra tells Junior that no one should have to bury their fridge, a take on the famous saying, "No one should have to bury their child."
* Cleveland has a *Cars 2* trapper keeper.
* *Error:* Holt was apparently able to take his shirt off, while both of his hands were massaging Cleveland.
* Kendra goes to the garage, when she needs to take a crap. Lester mentions that a week before the episode's events, he finally convinced her to close the garage door, while doing so. This was an advantage for everybody in the neighborhood.
* This episode marks Cleveland and Donna's third wedding in the overall series. The first was in "Cleveland Moves In", and the second was in "Terry Unmarried".
* Attendees of Cleveland and Donna's third wedding:
	+ Dee Dee Tubbs
	+ Ernie Krinklesac
	+ Choni Moreno
	+ Cecelia Moreno
	+ Yvette
	+ Gus
	+ Lester Krinklesac
	+ Dr. Fist
	+ Arch
	+ Cy the Sighing Bi Guy
	+ Murray Rollenstein
	+ Principal Farquhare
	+ Lloyd Waterman
	+ LeVar Brown
	+ Evelyn Brown
	+ Arianna the Bear
	+ Terry Kimple
	+ Paul Kimple
	+ Peter Griffin
	+ Lois Griffin
	+ Bonnie Swanson
	+ Joe Swanson
* Tim gave Donna away at the wedding, since she doesn't have a father.
* Roberta calls Cleveland's compliment sandwich a "Dagwood". This is a reference to the term "Dagwood Sandwich", which describes a ridiculously tall multi-layered sandwich, named after the character *Dagwood Bumstead*, from the newspaper comic strip, "*Blondie*".
* Donna has a Mag Gag at the beginning of the second act. The magazine reads "Boring Celebrity Weekly: Ron Livingston. Still on top." with a live action photograph of Ron Livingston.
* Cleveland says Gus is a good dancer.
* Junior breaks the fourth wall, when poor weather is occurring inside the house. As Junior is blown away by the indoor wind, he points out that illogical stuff like this can happen in cartoons.
* Cleveland calls Donna's one-upping him in therapy a "Slaughter Rule", which is a baseball term, for when the losing team is allowed to end the game, if the opposing team is drastically beating them, in order to spare them from further humiliation. This acknowledges Cleveland's interest in baseball.
* Dr. Fist "notes" that Cleveland's father never supported his inner-child.
* Donna mentions having a niece.
* Donna believes that Jesus Christ is a soccer fan.
* Cleveland sucks on Dr. Fist's (his psychologist's) finger, the way a baby would on his mother's breast. This is a reference to Sigmund Freud's theory of an "oral fixation".
* Cleveland and Lester break the fourth wall, when Cleveland berates him for using The Cleveland Show's platform to spread his homophobic idealism.
* It's revealed that Dr. Fist has an attractive Jewish wife.
* At the end of the episode, Cleveland breaks the fourth wall, when he gives the audience a faux-PSA on the worthlessness of marriage counseling, and then wishing them a Happy Valentine's Day.