Back Side of Water

The **Back Side of Water**is a scene wherein the boat passes beneath Schweitzer Falls' promontory.

## Description

### **Disneyland**

*Main article:  Disneyland's Jungle Cruise*

[Text.]

### **Magic Kingdom**

*Main article:  Magic Kingdom's Jungle Cruise*

The boat passes under Schweitzer Falls' overhang. It's stone on the starboard side and above the boat, and the Falls are on the port side. It's close enough to spray the port side (again).

Boats approaching Schweitzer Falls can be seen (and heard) from here, although the water obscures its sightlines.

## Location

### **Magic Kingdom**

The scene takes place on the Nile, after the Attacking Natives, but before approaching the Cambodian Temple.

## Spiel

### **Disneyland**

Again, we approach beautiful Schweitzer Falls. Notice the unique rock formation? I'll give you a different view this time, from behind.

Whitewater ahead, folks! It's the rapids of Kilimanjaro!

Keep your arms inside the boat; it's going to be close. Very treacherous, here. Notice how jagged the rocks are?

If we're not careful, these jagged rocks may rip out the bottom of our boat. Don't worry, though, I've made it through dozens of times. Once, I even brought the boat back!

Someone in the back, grab the rudder! Watch that big rock on the right! Looks like we'll make it. Thanks! You saved the boat!

### **Magic Kingdom**

#### **The Falls' Introduction**

We're approaching Schweitzer Falls again, this time, from behind. For those of you who've never seen the back side of water, here it is! It looks a lot like the front side, doesn't it?

And now, the moment you've all been waiting for:  the amazing...the colossal...the stupendous...the eighth wonder of the world...

* ...the back side of water!
	+ Or, as we skippers like to call it, "O2H."
	+ [Once the boat is past the Falls:]  And now, look back, only from this angle:  the side of water!
* ...the really funny boat!  There it goes.

Please don't try this at home.  You'll hit your head on the faucet.  Don't ask how I know this.

#### **Squeezing Through**

It's the Falls again!  We're going too fast; I'll have to thread the needle!  Watch the sides and the top! [The boat passes through the Back Side of Water.]  Everybody still have skin on their elbows?

It's the Falls again!  Let's hope the boat fits.  It's gonna be a tight squeeze!  ...nobody move...nobody breathe...  [The skipper indicates a specific guest.]  You're still breathing!

#### **Water**

If we start taking on water, we may have to lighten our load. [The skipper indicates a specific guest.]  Better get your belongings together.  You may be leaving us shortly.

If we start taking on water, just grab for the bright yellow cushions.  They're the ones that float.

You may wanna hold your breath, because we're heading under-water!

#### ***Jingle Cruise***

*Main article: Jingle Cruise*

And now, the moment you've all been waiting for: the amazing...the colossal...the stupendous...the eighth wonder of the world...

* ...the back side of water! A true Boxing Day miracle!
* ...the back side of egg nog!

I was gonna show you the back side of egg nog, but I couldn't find a big enough gingerbread cookie to go with it.