Darren Harbinger Bee

### Relatives

Stingo (Cousin), Phillip Nonce Bee (Long Lost and slightly more morally divergent brother)

### Occupation

Customer, Commissioner of Goods, Seeker of deals

## Appearances

### Appears in

Both Lidl and Farmfoods (not simultaneously)

### Debut

Unusual Memes Compilation

*"Hello, Lidl. I will have one Croissant (Croy-sant). I'll decide the price."*

Darren Bee is an accomplished businessman, crypto billionaire, Insurance Dealer, Drug trafficker, Photocopier, Tax accountant, Climate Changer, Dish Washer and Roadkill removal specialist. He is regularly referred to as the Harbinger, both because he is a sign of the end times, and because that is his middle name.

He is customer of the year at Lidl, and has been for 12 years running. You can confirm this by checking their website.

## Bio

Darren Bee was birthed by his mother (naturally), Danielle Herod Bee, in a local Vision Express. The workers were thrilled at this and bestowed upon him their finest sunglasses. Filled with gratitude, Darren Bee had his mother sting the lot of them, after which she died. Not long after this, Darren made a discovery that would change his life, and alter the course of humanity.

This discovery was Lidl (and adjacent to it, Farmfoods). Instantly, Darren buzzed in. The following is an employee testimony of the events that transpired:

1. "Hello, Lidl." he declared upon heading straight to till (ignoring the rest of the queue and the rest of the store) "I will have one Croissant. I'll decide the price."
2. "Right. Try before you buy." with these words he consumed the entire Croissant.
3. "No, I do not think I will buy this one." was his verdict.
4. He then proceeded to exit the store, walking back past the queue (which he had jumped.) "I wouldn't advise you shop here," He did in fact tell them. After which they all left.

The following day he would make his return. Here is the alleged course of events:

1. "Hello, Lidl." The standard greeting. "I will have one Pain Or Chocolate (Pain Au Chocolat). I'll decide the price."
2. "Try before you buy."
3. (The rest of the exchange is precisely as you imagine)

In the days that followed, Darren would leave a google review of the Lidl store, awarding the establishment with 2 stars, and simply stating "It isn't what it used to be."

Farmfoods was his next target. He made a bee-line for the "Seeds of Change" and brought them straight to the till. The initial till worker was of Indian descent, however Darren demanded to instead be served by someone who suited his ethnic sensibilities.

"Hello, merchant." were his opening words. "How much are the 'Seeds of Change'?"

"They are 10 for £1"

"Brilliant. I will take 9. Keep the change," he declared, heart filled with joy and charity.

"Sir this is not the correct amount of money."

"Have a nice weekend," were his parting words (It was Monday). He left the store without taking the items.

A few minutes later, he returned to request a receipt, which he claimed he needed due to the fact that he was "going next door"

## Trivia

Darren Bee reportedly shares his first name with a Farmfoods customer.

## Special talents

Darren Bee is a Man of many talents, similar to Chad Rex.

His talents include, but are not limited to:

-Buzzing in.

-Bargain Hunting.

-Lidl shopping.

-Farmfoods shopping.

-Food commisioning.

-Trying before he buys.