recursal/Fanatic-Fandom huggingface dataset:
Goldilock's punishment

**Goldilocks** was a 6 year old girl who lived with her parents in the countryside, she decided to go for a walk, so her Dad warned her not to go into the woods as she could get lost. But Goldilocks disobeyed and went into the woods, as guessed, she got lost. She found a house in the woods shortly after and went in, but right behind her were three bears, who then shoved her to the wall and beat her up. They kept her prisoner in their house, and made her do endless chores all day every day. They also gave her a buzz cut and cut off all her locks. Goldilocks then wailed for a straight 2 hours. She was only allowed to eat once a day, she had to scrub the floors all day round, she had to clean their toilets, she had to cook for the bears, she got a daily beating from the bears, she was doomed to be a slave the bears all of her life.

Fast forward 10 years later, Goldilocks was now 16 and was still a slave for the bears...
Sleeping Beauty (Beverlyjones and MedievalVibes)

Sleeping Talia Beauty was born to King Stefan Beauty and his wife, Queen Leah Beauty. She befriends Princess Fiona at a young age, way before Carabosse cast her slumber curse on her, and they had many parties during the day, she invites Fiona to her slumber party, but she doesn’t attend. SB was unaware why. She realises that Fiona hasn’t been around for a long time and she was devastated.

She went looking for Fiona, but unfortunately, she pricked her finger and the curse was fulfilled. Luckily, Prince Hunter came to the rescue. He defeated Carabosse and woke Sleeping up with True Love’s Kiss.
Red Queen

The **Red Queen** is a character from Shrek the Musical. She is based on the character from Lewis Carroll's Alice Through The Looking Glass.

## Shrek the Musical

The Red Queen is seen at Shrek's swamp, having been evicted from Duloc. She later sings Freak Flag and confronts Lord Farquaad with the rest of the fairy-tale characters. She also attends Shrek and Fiona's wedding.
Grinch (species)

**Grinches** are a type of ogre, called mountain ogres. They look like normal ogres, but have green fur. They fought in the Global Ogre War along with the other ogres, and many of them were killed. After the war, propaganda about them were created, such as the book How The Grinch Stole Christmas, which portrayed Grinches as Christmas-hating and grumpy.
Queen Lillian's Sisters

It was stated in the original Frog Prince fairy tale that the princess had a few sisters, so with Queen Lillian being based on that princess, I decided to create parodies of those sisters who are Disney Queens. I also think it is a tradition in Far Far Away for siblings of the monarch to have mini kingdoms within Far Far Away.

The sisters of Queen Lillian as as follows:

* Queen Katherine (Snow White's mother)
* Queen Ingrid (Snow White's stepmother)
* Queen Leila (Sleeping Beauty's mother)
* Queen Arianna (Rapunzel's mother)
* Queen Eudora (Princess Tiana's mother)
Badder

**Badder** is a song sung by Rapunzel, voiced by Maya Rudolph, and the Evil Queen, voiced by Susanne Blakeslee, as they battle to see who is the evilest queen.

## Lyrics

Please don't fear that you are upsetting me

Dear, I barely know you're there

Sorry, were you speaking? You're hard to see

Like a smell that lingers in the air

Trying to be clever, that makes no sense

That's a role you haven't earned

You don't see your own insignificance

Well, it's time you learned

You may think you're bad

But, darling, I am badder

Really, sweetie, where's the thrill in

Being just a—

Has-been (A wannabe) villain

You're a garter snake

And I'm a big puff adder

Face it, I am so much badder

Than you

Surely you can see it's ridiculous

Two villains in one fairy tale

Thiskingdom is too small for the both of us

So off into the sunset, you should sail

I can send my minions to help you pack

I'll be careful not to crow

Darling, I will miss you

Alas (Alack)

But you have got to go

You can claim you're bad

But I'm a better badder

Nothing you've got up your sleeve'll

Ever equal me as a mistress of evil

I'm the heart and brains

And you, you're just the bladder

How can you believe you're badder

Than I

Nobody ever would bother to tell

A tale with Carabosse and with Stromboli

My cheekbones are sharper

My hair's much more high

So jump down a rabbit hole

Go climb a beanstalk

It's not au revoir, but goodbye

Someone really should put a stop on her

(Someone really should put a stop on her)

Up to me to find a way (Up to me to find a way)

Maybe there's a house I can drop on her

Mmm, is a poisoned apple too cliché?

Drag her to a rooftop and toss her down

A spell to make her disappear

And when she is gone, I will own the kingdom

And everyone will cheer

She was sorta bad

But you are so much badder

Clearly that is why I have to

See that she lives happily never after

Once I sit alone atop the villain ladder

Everyone in Far Far Away

Will totally be in my thrall

They will say "Oh, Queen, we praise ya"

Because I will be not just badder

Because I will be not just badder

Badder, badder

But the nasty

Everlast-y

Flabbergast-y

Very, very baddest of them all
Do Ogres have part giant DNA?

Ogres (in the Shrek universe anyway) are supposed to be half-human half-frog. Shrek's great Aunt is a frog which is evidence towards this. But it would make no sense for ogres to be so tall is they are half-human half-giant, so that is why there is a high possibility they have some giant DNA contained in them.
Prince Charmless

Prince Hans Paul Charmless is a Prince who lives in Duloc Hills. He is named after Prince Paul from the Secret of Anastasia and Hans from Disney’s Frozen and is based on the Prince from the Snow Queen by Hans Christian Anderson. He is the husband of Princess Anna Stasia.

## Personality

Contrary to his name, Charmless is actually a CHARMING Prince. He is essentially a sheep in sheep’s clothing and a parody of the “evil prince” archetype in fiction.
Shrek time travels

Shrek gained the ability to time travel through unknown means. So he visited the 21st century and found that there were movies made about him and his life. It turns out that the movies inaccurately portrayed his life. he was outraged, and paid DreamWorks a visit. things didn't go well from there...

Shrek told Dreamworks his REAL life, about how Fiona was born an ogre to King Florian and Queen Snow White of the German kingdom of Stanley and she was locked in the tower because of this. At some point, she came across Dama Fortuna, who gave her a beauty potion, which gave her her curse.

The villain was called Lord Fort-Knox and he had to choose between Princesses Becca, Talia and Fiona, of which he chose Fiona. He was also born to Sneezy the dwarf and Cinderella. When Shrek came to Stanley, Fort-Knox sent him to rescue Fiona, which Shrek succeeded at. One night, Fiona his in an inn called the Outside Inn to conceal her true form, but Donkey discovered it.

Shrek heard the two talking and was hurt by it, so he gave Fiona to Fort-Knox the next morning and went home. Donkey talked sense into Shrek and they stopped the wedding, which gave Fiona time to show her true form to everyone. Fort-Knox tried to do what the previous King and Queen did, but Dragon came crashing in, devouring Fort-Knox.

Shrek 2 was actually about Shrek and Fiona going through Stanley's history to see how Fiona was born an ogre to human parents. The villain was Fiona's ogre ancestor, who told them the story.

Shrek the Third was about Shrek struggling to be King of Stanley, so he and Donkey search for Fiona's paternal first cousin, Artie. In the end, Artie finally became the new King of Stanley.

Dreamworks told Shrek they only told what they knew and that the events of the films were the humans' side of things. Shrek then went back home. At least HE knew the true events. And he told Beverlyjones those events. Everything I put in this story are all Shrek's words, I have not changed anything.
Shrek Twisted Tales

The **Shrek Twisted Tales** are Shrek books based on the Shrek films with what-if scenarios that completely change the stories.

## List of books

All Star: A Twisted Shrek Tale (What if Lord Farquaad picked Snow White?)

Holding Out For A Hero: A Twisted Shrek Tale (What if one of Sleeping Beauty's fairy godmothers was the villain?)

Hideous Ugly Beast: A Twisted Shrek Tale (What if Fiona was the Princess of Duloc?)
How the Grinch Stole Christmas

**How the Grinch Stole Christmas** is a book written as part of propaganda against Grinches.

## Plot

The Grinch is a cranky, solitary creature with a heart "two sizes too small" who resides in a cave on a mountain north of Whoville, home of the cheerful and warmhearted Whos. One Christmas Eve, having grown tired by Whoville's noisy Christmas festivities, the Grinch resolves to prevent Christmas from coming. He disguises himself as Santa Claus and travels to Whoville on a sleigh hauled by his dog, Max. The Grinch slides down the chimney of the first house on the square and steals all the presents, the food for the feast, and the Christmas tree. He is briefly interrupted by Cindy Lou Who, a young Who girl, but concocts a crafty lie to get rid of her so that he can escape.

After doing the same to the other Whos' houses, the Grinch takes his sleigh to the top of Mount Crumpit and prepares to dump all of the stolen belongings into an abyss. As dawn breaks, he expects to hear the Whos crying, but is shocked to hear them singing a joyous Christmas song as usual instead. After much thought, the Grinch comes to realize that Christmas "means a little bit more" than just presents and feasting, causing his shrunken heart to grow three sizes larger. The reformed Grinch returns the Whos' presents and food and is asked to take part in their Christmas feast.
Fear Pirates

The Fear Pirates are henchmen of the Fairy Godmother who reside at the Far Far Away Swimming Pool.

## Appearance

They look like black shadows with pirate hats and eye-patches

## Role

The Fear Pirates exist to make visitors of the pool feel coldness and fear by turning their clothes into swimming trunks, making them forever wet and having the coldness be with them forever and ever.

The Pirates also live in fear.
The Little Mermaid

There once was a Mermaid, named Ariel. She didn't like the sea very much, and wanted to give it up. She soon found herself on the shore of Far Far Away, she saw Shrek near the shore a lot of the time, and instantly fell in love with him, But she was too nervous to approach him, until one day, she had the courage to sneak near him and kiss him, Shrek's wife, Fiona, picks her up and throws her to the Sharks, Ariel gets eaten, The End.
Knave of Hearts

The **Knave of Hearts** is a character in the Shrek universe. He is based on the character of the same name from Alice in Wonderland and is an allusion to the Prince from Sleeping Beauty.

## Role

He apparently never kissed Sleeping Talia Beauty when she succumbed to her curse, as he admitted to Prince Charming when he was looking his father.
Princess Pondicherry

**Princess Pondicherry** is an African Princess who lived in a chocolate palace that never melted. She went to her kingdom's chocolate factory where she got her palace and got confused when she saw a box with a blue screen. The owner of the factory told her it was Bonkavision, where he sends chocolate to be released on TV.
King Harold (Cinderella)

**King Harold** is the King of Cinderella's kingdom in Disney's Cinderella. He is a good king, but also short-tempered.

## Past

Harold started life as a poor orphaned boy, but a Fairy Godmother directed him toward the King and Queen, who took pity on him and adopted him.

At some point, Prince Harold met Princess Gertie and fell in love with her. After their wedding, they got coronated as the new King and Queen.

## Trivia

King Harold from Shrek is a parody of Cinderella's King Harold, since Shrek is a parody of Disney films.
Come in and Buy Paint (Fridge Day version)

This version of **Welcome To Duloc** is written for Christmas 2023 to celebrate the 100th anniversary of the Kingdom of Duloc.

## Lyrics

Welcome to Duloc,

Such a merry town,

When the rules are lax

And there are Christmas sacks

Santa Claus will drop by

But soon, he’ll say bye

Duloc is a merry place.

Peace and goodwill to all

Food to stuff your face

Duloc is, Duloc is,

Duloc is a merry place.
Penelope

**Penelope** is the former Princess of Duloc. She is the mother of Farquaad and the wife of Grumpy. She is a parody of the titular character from the upcoming Disney film of the same name.

## Role

Penelope was the princess of Duloc was was disinherited from her title after marrying Grumpy the dwarf out of love. She had a hard time sleeping on the couple's lumpy mattress, so Grumpy stacked 25 mattresses on top of one another to ease her sleeping. However, Penelope fell from the top mattress to her death, leaving Grumpy to raise their only child, Maximus Farquaad.
Goldilocks trespasses

Goldilocks went out for a walk, it was a very sunny day in June, so she went for a 'nice' long walk and eventually after walking for over an hour, she encountered a somewhat mysterious looking swamp. Goldilocks was exhausted after all this walking so she went to the mysterious Swamp House, she knocked on the door and out came a fierce ogre known as Thelonius who grabbed her and tied her to a chair, he then took out a pair of scissors and cut every single bit of her hair off, and then he set her free. Goldilocks ran all the way home, weeping. The end... or is it?
De Woudprinses

Edizioni Piemme (IT)

**De Woudprinses** is deel 4 in de serie Prinsessen van Fantasia van Thea Stilton. De Nederlandse editie verscheen 26 Maart 2012.

## Flaptekst

De rust in Fantasia wordt opnieuw verstoord. Deze keer in het Weelderige Woud. Het trotse volk van de Nai-Lai wil de strijd aangaan met prinses Yara en haar de oorlog te verklaren. Yara wil dit koste wat het kost voorkomen en om het lot van het rijk te beslissen besluit ze de leider van de Nai-Lai stam uit te dagen tot een wedstrijd boogschieten.

Maar nadat de wedstrijd achter de rug is, blijft er gevaar dreigen. En de oude, wijze Keverman lijkt daarin een rol te spelen. Het wordt hoog tijd dat de dappere Yara zich bij haar zussen voegt. De dreiging die al veel te lang als een duistere schaduw boven Fantasia hangt lijkt steeds groter te worden...
Princess Puppaya Stafiend

Puppaya Stafiend (nee. Twit) is Mr Twit's sister who married a Prince with the surname Stafiend.

She is based on the Princess from the Princess and the Pea.

## Background

Puppaya is Mr Twit's younger sister and he used to pick on her when they were kids. When Puppaya married Prince Stafiend, Mr Twit tried to worm his way in her favor as the future queen.
Crabby

Crabby is a dwarf from the Shrek deleted scene Fiona Gets Them Lost. He is based on Crabby from Lisa Simpson’s version of Snow White and loosely based on the Prince from the Princess and the Bowling Ball.

## History

Crabby married Princess Ball thé Bowling, who left her throne to marry him. One night, Crabby pulled a prank on his wife by putting a bowling ball in her bed. However, Ball fell off her bed to her death, leaving Crabby widowed and guilt-ridden.

Crabby also had a habit of muttering Ho-Hi, then he would get high, implying he turned to drugs after his wife’s death.

## Fiona Gets Them Lost

Crabby is the dwarf that says « Stop! Stop! You’re too big to enter thee mine! »
Duloc - 100 Year Anniversary

It had been 100 years since the birth of the Lordship of Duloc had been founded, so Fiona, feeling obliged to celebrate it, being the ex-Queen of Duloc, visited the ogres there and let them know about the anniversary.

They celebrated in the Great Hall of Castle Duloc. The fairy-tale characters that originally came from Duloc also joined in the celebration.

Fiona also gave a lecture on the history of the Lordship; how it was originally founded by King Walter Duloc and how he collected fairy-tale beings to live there. Walt was then succeeded by his son, King Florian and his wife, Queen Snow White, who was infertile, so on their deathbed, made Maximus Farquaad the new Lord of Duloc. Fiona also lectured on how Farquaad ruled Duloc and how he got eaten. Then came Walt Duloc's distant relative, Melissa Disney, who got crowned Queen of Duloc immediately, but she died as well, leaving Duloc deserted and abandoned.

Fiona then decided to take her rightful place as Queen Dowager of Duloc, going against Farquaad's wishes by having Duloc be a place of freedom and allowed the fairy-tale characters back in Duloc.
The Fast and the Stinky

Once upon a time, in the land of Far Far Away, it was the day of the big race. The champion runner, an athletic wolf, was to compete against a young child named Gary. But the kid had a secret plan to win. He rubbed dog poo on the bottom of his shoes.

”There’s no way the champion will win if he has to hold his nose the whole time! This will be more exciting than a fun run.”

At the starting line, the champion noticed the stench.

”You smell like an unbathed meerkat! That’s the most foul thing I’ve ever smelled!” the champion said.

The champion certainly didn’t have the speed of a cheetah car on THIS day and the child won the race with ease.

”Good golly!” said the champion, “That was the best trick in the book!”
Dictator for a day

There is this 19 year old with an unknown name who feels powerless due to long term social anxiety, He walks through a forest and finds a man who is "stuck" he helps the man out and the man offers him a ride. During the chat he tells the man he feels powerless and wishes he could be a dictator for just a day. The man says he can make that happen in exchange for a day, He pulls out a contract called "Dictator for a day" he signs it and ends up in an alternate timeline where he is a dictator. He finds out and starts to enjoy himself. Not for long though until the man showed up with many witches to steal his dictator title. The man, who's real name turns out to be Rumpelstiltskin told the guy by accident the only way out of this is by guessing his name. So Cinderella's Fairy Godmother shows up and whispers his name. So the guy said the name and the contract was broken and the real world was restored.
Sleeping Talia Beauty

Princess Sleeping Talia Beauty is one of Princess Fiona’s friends. She is voiced by Cheri Oteri

## Background

When she was born, she always fell asleep, so the King and Queen named her Sleeping Beauty, but they gave her the middle name Talia.

On her and her brother Sleeping Handsome‘s christening, Flora, Fauna and Merryweather were invited and gave them gifts, but when Merryweather was about to give her gifts, the evil fairy Carabosse cursed them to prick their fingers on a spindle on their 15th birthday and die. Merryweather altered the sleeping curse so that they would fall asleep. King Beauty ordered all spindles in Far Far Away to be burned.

15 years later, Sleeping and Jour turned into beautiful young people, who, true to her name, always fell asleep. They also had a younger sister called Annie, who was very energetic. Unfortunately trouble was never too far away, for Carabosse had turned into an old woman and lured Sleeping and Jour to the tower where she pricked her finger and fell asleep.

Soon, a Prince named Prince Stefan and his sister, Princess Charming, rode by and remembered the tale of Sleeping Beauty and Handsome. They went in the castle and saw the two siblings. Stefan kissed Sleeping, but that didn’t work, but luckily Annie gave her a kiss of true sisterly love, which was enough to awaken her older sister. Charming however had luck awakening Jour

## Shrek 2

Sleeping attended the Royal Ball Blowout with her sister.

## Shrek the Third

Sleeping helped the Princess of Far Far Away and her friends fight against Prince Charming and the other villains. When the villains became good, Sleeping took an interest in Rumpelstiltskin.
Dwarf Prince

This **dwarf Prince** was a Prince and the husband of Princess Becca. He was the Prince of a small area in Far Far Away called Poulton and was also the dwarf that drove the carriage that took Shrek, Donkey and Fiona to Far Far Away.

He died during an accident when parking the carriage with Donkey, making his wife Princess Dowager.

He is based on the Prince from the Princess and the Pea.

## Shrek 2

He was the dwarf that drive the carriage taking Shrek, Donkey and Fiona to Far Far Away.
King Harold's Ogre War

This **ogre war** was committed by King Harold of Far Far Away, when Ogres tried to take over the kingdom.

## People who fought

Citizens of Far Far Away

Fa Mulan

Darren

## Aftermath

After the war, ogres were forced to isolate themselves. King Harold also spread propaganda against ogres throughout the kingdom.

This event also led Lord Farquaad to get rid of fairytale creatures from Duloc.

## Trivia

This war could have been the Global Ogre War.

It is possible that the Fairy Godmother forced this war so she could curse Fiona to become an ogress every night.
Shrek Fanfiction

Fiona and Lord Farquaad kissed at their wedding. Fiona thought her curse was gone, but then the sun went down and she turned into an ogre.

“Oooooh! It’s disgusting!” Farquaad almost choked, “Guards! Guards! I order you to get IT out of my sight! All this hocus pocus alters nothing, This marriage is binding and that makes me King! See? See? I will have you, my wife, locked back in the tower for the rest of your days! I will have order! I will have perfection!”

Soon Fiona was back in her tower. She didn’t understand. She thought that Farquaad was her Prince Charming. So why wasn’t her spell broken? This trauma hardened her. So much that she was eager to accept her curse. So she escaped the tower on her own, leaving her tiara and wedding ring behind. She travelled all the way back to the outskirts of Far Far Away, where she met a big ogre. He introduced her to other big ogres, which Fiona then became a part of. They told her that Far Far Away was now under the control of King Rumpel and they must take him down. Fiona worked with them, they were to ambush him on a nightly patrol, which failed, as it was really the Pied Piper, who fluted them to Rumpel. Fortunately, the ogres had a back-up plan. They whistled and other ogres came out of the place ball. They outnumbered Rumpel and captured him. Fiona could now be Queen of Far Far Away. Unfortunately, the sun rose and Fiona turned human. However, unlike Farquaad, who shunned her for being an ogre, the ogres embraced her for being a human.
Princess Mayblossom

**Princess Mayblossom** is a Princess. She is based on the Princess from the Princess Mayblossom by Madame D’Aulnoy.

## Past

Mayblossom was born to a King and Queen who had lost their previous children, but the Queen dismissed a nurse who was Maleficent in disguise. Enraged, Maleficent cursed Mayblossom to be miserable for the next 20 years, but Dama Fortuna, the Fairy Godmother of Far Far Away, had it so that Mayblossom would be happy after those 20 years.

Mayblossom was locked in a tower to minimise the harm. Dama Fortuna put an advertisement of the Princess in the Magic Mirror and sent it far and wide to find a Prince for her.
Lady Farquhar

After the terror in Duloc that was the Ghost of Lord Farquaad, then came a similarly ambitious woman named Lady Farquhar. She wanted to be Queen of Duloc, but she had to marry a Prince to do that. She chose Prince Eric as her King and sent Beverlyjones and MedievalVibes to get him. However, as Beverlyjones and MedievalVibes were well aware of her intentions, they used their knowledge to come up with a plan to stop Lady Farquhar becoming queen. They had the plan to contact Cindy's fairy godmother for help with the plan, and so they did. Cindy's fairy godmother appeared and they asked Cindy's fairy godmother if she can magic up a Prince Eric lookalike. And so she did, this lookalike was actually an ordinary man with an unknown name who lived in Far Far away, and was confused as to why he was teleported over to Beverlyjones and MedievalVibes. He was just confused and in shock, but then Beverlyjones and told him the story, about an evil ruler in Duloc names Lady Farquhar and how she wanted to marry a prince just so that she could become king. And so the man agreed to pretend to be king Eric and marry Farquhar. So MedievalVibes and Beverlyjones brought the man to Farquhar.

The wedding began, and the priest was reading the normal lines in a wedding, but then, the man admitted that he wasn't Prince Eric, but instead, a lookalike, unfortunately, the man didn't make it out, as he was then put to death by Farquhar's guards. She then sent the guards out to find MedievalVibes and Beverlyjones, but they were nowhere to be seen.

To this day, no guards successfully got to Prince Eric, and Farquhar never became queen.
Beauty

Beauty is a Princess who lives in the Kingdom of Far Far Away. She is based on Beauty from the Beauty and the Beast fairytale.

## Past

Beauty was born to a Queen Regnant and a Male fairy. However, she was placed in the care of a merchant.

## Story

Soon the merchant lost all his wealth at sea, forcing him and his family to move to a cottage and to work for a living. His sister, Aunt Marguerite, kept complaining about it, ranting how she “knew he would drive them to the poor house.”
Shrek Fanfiction: Sleeping Beauty

Fiona and Lord Farquaad were now King and Queen of Duloc AND Far Far Away. They had a beautiful baby girl, named Felicia Farquaad. They had a christening, where everyone in Duloc and Far Far Away were invited to. 3 fairies were invited to give her magic gifts, which Farquaad reluctantly accepted. But then, as the 3rd fairy was about to give her gift, an angry witch came in.

”I see you have not invited me,” she shrieked, “so here’s MY gift. Felicia, on her 15th birthday, will prick her finger on a spindle and DIE!”

Farquaad was horrified by this, but the 3rd fairy softened the curse so that Felicia would only fall asleep until awakened by true love’s kiss. But what no one knew was that the “witch” was actually Fiona’s fairy godmother. She had actually planned for Fiona to marry her son, Prince Charming, but since she married another human, she was fine with this and put a never-ageing spell on Charming so he could marry Felicia.

15 years went by and Felicia grew into a beautiful but strong woman. The Fairy Godmother’s magic was powerful, however, and Felicia was able to be lured by it, prick her finger and fall asleep. Everyone was devastated. Prince Charming then came in and kissed her, but it failed to wake her up. The 3 fairies were devastated. Flora then kissed Felicia on her forehead and that woke her up.

Everyone was happy now, except for Fiona, who was still in an unhappy marriage to Farquaad.

The End.
Alex’s letter to Shrek

Dear Shrek Pendragon,

In September 2018, I went to Shrek’s London adventure with my sister and stepfather and I enjoyed it. I told the shop cashier about Fiona’s curse being the result of her being half-frog and I also told a witch about you being PART-frog. I also provided the Muffin Man’s ingredient.

Yours sincerely,

Alex Downs
Holding Out For A Hero (book)

**Holding Out For A Hero: A Tale of the Fairy Godmother** is the first book of the A Tale of series by Beverlyjones and MedievalVibes. The book concerns the backstory of the Fairy Godmother Dama Fortuna and how she came to believe that “ogres don’t live happily ever after”.

## Description

Obsessia Fortuna, born from a family of poverty, tries to find a way to further her family’s status by getting together with a member of the local royal family. But will she succeed?
Sleeping Beauty 2: The Deceased Mother-in-Law

Sleeping and Prince Hunter were enjoying life at King Stefan’s palace until a letter came from Prince Hunter’s castle. They had to go to it following Hunter’s mother’s passing.

Prince Hunter’s kingdom was called Norbreck and it was ruled by the human King Hubert and the deceased cheetah Queen Laini. The kingdom was another piece of land of the Kingdom of Ormond. Queen Laini’s mother, Queen Fuli were also there. They explained that Queen Laini had been killed by Carabosse and they had to put her ashes outside the Norbreck Swimming Pool. They went there, put the ashes around the place and they had Captain Hook sing “Little Drop of Poison” since that was Queen Laini’s favourite song. They mourned and spent the night at Norbreck Castle. No matter what, they will get through this tragedy.
The Seven Bandits

**The Seven Bandits** are a group of bandits seen in Shrek the Musical. They are based on the 7 Bandits from the Disney Snow White remake.

## Shrek the Musical

The 7 bandits are seen in Shrek the Musical placing Prince Jonathan's coffin on Shrek's dinner table. Shrek tried to get it off the table, but one of the bandits claim that "the bed's taken".

It is also revealed that one of the bandits married a Prince of Duloc and they are Lord Farquaad's parents.
We Don't Talk About Ogres

**We Don't Talk About Ogres** is the Shrek version of We Don't Talk About Bruno from Disney's Encanto. It is sung by the villains of the Shrek franchise.

## Lyrics

**Fairy Godmother;** We don't talk about ogres, no, no, no.

We don't talk about ogres

But it was Fiona's birthday

**Prince Charming;** My betrothed's birthday

**Fairy Godmother;** I cursed her so when the sun set in the sky

**Charming;** Sun set in the sky

**Fairy Godmother;** She turns into an ogre

**Charming;** A hideous ogre

**Fairy Godmother;** Are you telling this story or am I

**Prince Charming;** I'm sorry mother go on

**Fairy Godmother;** I had her locked in a tower

**Charming;** In the highest room

**Fairy Godmother;** Till my son rescues her

**Charming;** In the tallest tower

**Fairy Godmother;** But an ogre got in the way.

**Fairy Godmother, Charming;** We don't talk about ogres, no, no, no

We don't talk about ogres.
Saraousch

**Saraousch** is Madeline’s wicked stepfather, who runs the Far Far Away Circus and plotted to steal the bell from the bell tower. However, Madeline and Quasimodo defeat him and banish him to the Poison Apple. He is based on Saraousch from Disney’s The Hunchback of Norte Dame 2.

## Shrek the Third

Saraousch hears about Charming’s plan to take over Far Far Away and was in full support of it, until Artie told them they can stop being villains, at which point Saraousch becomes a better person.
Harry Potter

Harry James Potter is a half-stag human wizard who went to Hogwarts School of Wizardry and Witchcraft and learned necessary skills needed to defeat Lord Voldemort.

He is the son of a human mother and a stag father.

Harry is also a descendant of the Far Far Away Royal Family on his mother’s side, being King Harold’s great-nephew.
Thelonius is an Ogre theory

So, this may be a classic theory/thought that you might have heard before. Thelonius is the former henchmen/executioner for Lord Farquaad, but have you noticed how much taller he is compared to the human characters and how similiar his build is compared to Shrek? You can see he may have green eyes, but what if those aren't his eyes but instead his skin? Tell us your opinion in the comments.
Wild Uncharted Waters

**Wild Uncharted Waters** is a song sung by Queen Lillian whilst discussing her past as a princess and also by King Harold. It is a parody of the song Wild Uncharted Waters from Disney's Little Mermaid remake.

## Lyrics

**Queen Lillian:** When I was young,

I had dreamed someday,

That I could

See my kingdom, yes,

My father said I was rebellious.

But then a frog came

From these, these, Wild Uncharted waters!

**King Harold:** The reason I came,

I had fallen in love

With a human Princess

Whom I loved more than what I could ever love

More than these "Wild Uncharted Waters".

**Queen Lillian:** Yes, I wanted more

To be a part of these,

**Both:** Wild Uncharted Waters!
Watching Shrek 2

On Sunday 10 April 2022, Beverlyjones decided to watch Shrek 2 on TV again. When it came on, he magicked himself into the film. The Enchantress from Beauty and the Beast came along.

When it was time to go to Far Far Away, the Enchantress made the carriage to look like the one that took Maurice back to the village.

When the Fairy Godmother introduced herself to Fiona, the Enchantress introduced herself as a Fairy Godmother too, which she WAS.

Beverlyjones used Tinker Bell’s pixie dust to make me fly after the Fairy Godmother’s Carriage when she took Harold to talk. he heard that she had slept with 12 kings to give birth to the Disney Princes, but Charming was her favourite. Jones also ordered a Medieval Meal from the Friar Fat Boy as a treat.

The next morning Beverlyjones went with Shrek, Donkey and Puss to the Fairy Godmother’s factory and he couldn’t help noticing there was more to the Fairy Godmother than meets the eye.

Later, Jones asked to put some of the Happily Ever After potion on his Madam Mim dragon POP vinyl, but Shrek said No. When we were rushing out of the rain, Jones noticed the mushroom Shrek had sneezed on had turned into a rose, so he picked it and put it in his pocket.

During the climax, Jones had a short magical duel with the Fairy Godmother and when her spell reflected off of Harold’s armour, He also cast the Revilio spell in its direction and exposed the Godmother’s true identity as the so-called “good” fairy from the Beauty and the Beast fairytale, Cat Cosa. That explained his suspicions.

At the end, Jones danced to Donkey and Puss’s rendition of Livin’ La Vida Loca, then got magically transported back home.
The Princess and the Frog

Once upon a time, in the Kingdom of Far Far Away, there was a Princess named Tiana. She had an uncle who was a wizard and she also laughed like a donkey.

One day, Tirana’s mother, Queen Eudora, tried to marry her off to a neighbouring Prince. Tiana didn’t like this, so she ran off and came across a frog who claims to be Prince Eadric of Maldonia, and needed a kiss to turn human. Tiana reluctantly kissed him, only to turn into a frog HERSELF!

The pair decide to go to the Fairy Godmother for a way to reverse the spell. They had to wait for the King and Queen of Far Far Away to see her, then it was their turn. The Godmother explained that Tiana turned into a frog because she was a magical princess, as in having a magical uncle, and their NEXT kiss will turn them human. So they kissed again and they turned human. They had also fallen in love, so they marry and lived happily ever after.

The End.
What if Fiona was adopted into the Royal Family of Far Far Away?

After locking Fiona away in a tower, and telling their subjects that Fiona was “such a rare beauty” she was kidnapped, King Florian and Queen Snow-White met up with King Harold and Queen Lillian of the neighbouring kingdom of Far Far Away who couldn’t have children and they adopted Fiona as THEIR child.

Florian and Snow-White later have another daughter, named Yasmine, but she fell in love with a commoner dwarf named Grumpy and she was therefore disinherited.

The King and Queen later died.
Toodles

**Toodles** is Beverlyjones’s mermaid doll that went with him into the Shrek universe during a showing of Shrek 2.

## Role

Toodles had no particular role in the story rather than just being there. Her prominent role was with the Happily Ever After potion, which Beverlyjones purposely spilt some on her. When everyone woke up the next morning, along with Shrek and Fiona, Toodles had become human.

At midnight, Beverlyjones asked Toodles which form she’d like to remain in, to which she said she’d like to remain human, so Beverlyjones kissed her and Toodles’s transformation was similar to Fiona’s permanent ogre transformation at the end of the 1st film.

Toodles is currently living in Far Far Away in a house in the middle of a mermaid loch.
The Smelliest Spell

Once upon a time, a meerkat who calls himself Timone devised a wicked spell to make every child in the land of Far Far Away smell like manure. He bought a ticket to the Lion King Musical because every kid would be there and brought along the eyeball of a lion to mix into his evil potion. Just as all of the kids were arriving in a giant blue taxi, one child saw him mixing the evil potion and called out “Hevi kabesa!” With barely any time to spare, the fiend was stopped from executing his wicked plan. The next edition of the Far Far Away newspaper had this headline: BRAVEST CHILD IN THE LAND SAVES THE DAY!
Sleeping Beauty's slumber party

Sleeping Talia Beauty's sleepover at her castle was a blast. All the Princesses (sans Fiona because of her curse), her fairy godmothers and her future husband, Prince Hunter, attended. Talia wore a purple nightgown. Her parents, King and Queen Beauty, allowed her to have this sleepover, as did her maternal grandparents, King Henry and Queen Jean.

First they had a pillow fight, which got a bit rough. Then they had a midnight snack in a kitchen. After that, they went to sleep. All of Talia's guests had air mattresses to sleep on.

The next day, they went swimming at the castle's swimming pool. Captain Hook played a tune for the swimmers.
Violet

**Violet** is a mermaid and the titular character from the Little Mermaid by Hans Christian Anderson.

## Story

Her story is a faithful adaptation to the fairytale, killing herself and becoming a Daughter of the Air after the Prince marries a human Princess.

## Trivia

The Little Mermaid seen at the beginning of Shrek 2 is the FAKE Little Mermaid.
Wendy Darling

**Wendy Darling** is a character who made an appearance in Shrek Reekin' Havoc.

## Role

She had grown to a teenage during the events of the four Shrek films; which explains Peter Pan's dwindling tolerance for Tinkerbell. Yet Wendy would appear to have gotten a really bad case of insomnia after her extended stay in Neverland. Her hair is kind of messy, her eyes are baggy, and she still wears night outfits on a regular basis. Some say that Wendy still dreams of Peter Pan, which is why she mostly refuses to ever go to sleep. Having discovered his true intentions with her, she is afraid of the boy showing up at her nusring home to abduct Wendy; or worse, her own children, especially Jane and her granddaughter, Margaret.
The Treacherous Birthday

It was Snow White's 18th birthday. Kids were given half a day off schools and everyone in Far Far Away were invited to dinner at the Evil Queen's Castle that night.

When the night came, Snow White was acting spoilt. That is, until Prince Charming came and she went up to him and kissed him. Charming was actually Snow White's Prince. Not Fiona's, not Rapunzel's. Snow White's. They were putting on a show that night to celebrate their romance. Shrek was reluctant about it, but Charming assured him he won't try to kill him this time.

When the show was on, it went uninterrupted, until a light shone on Snow's face and her skin melted away. Snow was actually UGLY and her so-called beauty was to hide that. That fairest of all election really WAS rigged. Snow White ran off crying and Charming was left single again. Shrek assured Charming it was ok to be single and he didn't NEED a girlfriend to be happy.

The End.
Woody

Woody is a China chimney sweep that used to be sold in the souvenir shop in the Lordship of Duloc. He is based on the 2nd titular character from the fairytale The Shepherdess and the Chimney Sweep and is named after Woody from Disney Pixar’s Toy Story.

He is the fiancé of the China shepherdess Maria.
The Yeti Princess

The Yeti Princess is a book that Shrek had from Duloc that told the tale of a Princess called Peachie Angel who was enchanted to turn into a yeti every night.

## Plot

Princess Peachie Angel, a princess cursed to be a yeti at night, waited for her true love to come. Eventually, he did, in the form of Prince Maximus, who kissed her and married her.
What's Scary Duloc

**What's Scary Duloc** is the Scared Shrekless version of What's Up Duloc from Shrek the Musical. It is sung by the Duloc Dancers and the Red Death.

## Lyrics

Welcome to Duloc
It's a creepy town
What was once pristine
Now is all run down
We will chop off your head
And then laugh when you're dead
Duloc is a Creepy Place
Come on in, What the heck
Hold them down
Break your... face.
Duloc is, Duloc is,
Duloc is a Creepy—
Place!
And here's the one who made it happen That towering colossus of moxie The Red Death [The Red Death] Oh it's you What a terrific surprise Once upon a time This place was pristine Muggles on every corner I had them all killed Hey nonny-nonny-nonny-no Things are looking scary here in Duloc [Duloc Dancers] Just take a look [Lord Farquaad] The things I'm cooking up here in Duloc [Duloc Dancers] He likes to cook [Lord Farquaad] A model that amazes A plan with seven phases [Duloc Dancers] Bum bum bum bum bum [Lord Farquaad] Things are looking scary here in Duloc [Duloc Dancers] They're looking up [Lord Farquaad] In Duloc The ladies all burn swell The men are so hot Thanks to my new firework The fashion's never Clashing Hey nonny-nonny-nonny-no And so [Duloc Dancers] And so [Red Death] And so [Duloc Dancers] And so [Red Death] And so [Red Death] The upshot is enormous When you can shout [Duloc Dancers] Conform us [Red Death] Yes Things are looking scary (Things are looking scary) Here in Duloc Hey, let's hear it for those Duloc dancers Aren't they hot? There's no sign of slowing We're growing, we're growing [Duloc Dancers] Look, he's growing And growing And growing Look at him grow [Red Death] Things are looking scary here [Duloc Dancers] We practiced this part both forward and back We make one mistake, and we get the rack [Lord Farquaad] Things Are looking scary here [Duloc Dancers] Things are looking scary [Red Death] Things are looking scary Here in Duloc [Duloc Dancers] Ah-ah-ah-ah [Red Death] Here in Duloc [Duloc Dancers] Ah-ah-ah-ah Scaaaaaaaaaary.
Will Prince Charming try again?

So, Prince Charming was a Villain in Shrek 2, and the main village of Shrek 3. But will he be back for Shrek 5? Probably notconsidering he was a Villain in 2 out of the 4 films. But me might return ..... Remember Charming convincing all the villains at the poison apple bar to help him take over Far Far Away? So they did... and fast forward to the end, King Arthur convinces them to stop being villains and they all drop their weapons and give up their evil ways. Except for Charming who tries to kill Arthur. Eventually he gets defeated and a tower possibly falls on him, but he survived as he was seen in the Thriller night audience. The next part is the most important part. Remember Charming Sitting in the Thriller night audience which takes place after Shrek 4? You can see him sit beside Captain Hook and cyclops, which would be unusual as they supposably gave up their ways when Charming didn't. So maybe he convinced them to be villains again and to help him take the throne from Arthur. Or he simply gave up his evil ways after the events of Shrek The Third.
Eurowizyjna Karaoke Grand Prix 3

Trzecia edycja **Eurowizyjna Karaoke Grand Prix** została zorganizowana w lipcu i sierpniu2021 roku.

### Pierwszy półfinał

W pierwszym półfinale bierze udział 16 piosenek. Dominika oraz Kuba i Dominika również głosują w tym półfinale.

### Pierwszy półfinał

W pierwszym półfinale bierze udział 16 piosenek. Dominika oraz Kuba i Dominika również głosują w tym półfinale.

### Drugi półfinał

W drugim półfinale bierze udział 16 piosenek. Dominika oraz Wiktoria i Adrian również głosują w tym półfinale.

### Finał

W drugim półfinale bierze udział 16 piosenek. Dominika oraz Wiktoria i Adrian również głosują w tym półfinale.
Ugly Stepsisters

Cinderella's **ugly sisters** are characters seen in Shrek the Musical. They were banished to Shrek's swamp after being evicted from Duloc.

## Shrek the Musical

The stepsisters were seen as fairy-tale characters banished to Shrek's swamp, where they were begging the Fairy Godmother to make them princesses.

Later, they sing Freak Flag with the other characters, and confront Farquaad afterward. At Shrek and Fiona's wedding, the Fairy Godmother finally makes them princesses.

## Trivia

These ugly stepsisters are different characters to Doris and Mabel from the Shrek sequels.
Unfairest of Them All; A Tale of the Evil Queen

**Unfairest of Them All; A Tale of the Evil Queen** is the 3rd book in the A Tale of series. It chronicles the Evil Queen's backstory and her strained relationship with her daughter Snow White.

## Basic summary

A depressed, insecure peasant girl encounters a fairy godmother, who guides her on her path of true love, happy endings and eventually, a daughter's birth. But is it all too good to be true.
Beverlyjones and MedievalVibes revisit Shrek script

Fairy Godmother: Neither of you know anything about me!

Beverlyjones: I know that you gave Cinderella’s stepsibling a magical sex change

Fairy Godmother: So what?

MedievalVibes: I know you want to be Queen Mother of Far Far Away

Fairy Godmother: Big deal.

Beverlyjones: I know that you are the evil twin sister of Cinderella’s Fairy Godmother and that you either created Charming with your magic or you had him with either Uther Pendragon or Queen Lillian’s father, King Charming Sr.

(Fairy Godmother stares at both of us; stunned.)

MedievalVibes: But most importantly, both of us know that you might have been the witch who cursed Fiona as a precaution to get Charming on the throne.

Fairy Godmother: Aaaarrrrrr!

(She tries to kill both of them, but Cinderella’s Fairy Godmother saves them.)
Zablokowane piosenki

**Albania**

* Ronela Hajati - Sekret (ESC 2022)

**Szablon:Andora**

* -

 **Armenia**

* Tamar Kaprelian - Poison (Ari Ari) (Preselekcje ESC 2018)

 **Australia**

* Didirri - Raw Stuff (Preselekcje ESC 2020)

 **Austria**

* Trackshittaz - Woki mit deim Popo (ESC 2012)

 **Azerbejdżan**

* -

 **Belgia**

* -

 **Białoruś**

* Litesound - We Are the Heroes (ESC 2012)

 **Bośnia i Hercegowina**

* -

 **Bułgaria**

* Intelligent Music Project - Intention (ESC 2022)

 **Chorwacja**

* -

 **Cypr**

* Hovig - Gravity (ESC 2017)

 **Czarnogóra**

* Vladana - Breathe (ESC 2022)

 **Czechy**

* Giudi - Jezinky (Preselekcje ESC 2022)

 **Dania**

* Leeloo - That Vibe (Preselekcje ESC 2019)

 **Estonia**

* Elina Born & Stig Rästa - Goodbye to Yesterday (ESC 2015)

 **Finlandia**

* The Rasmus - Jezebel (ESC 2022)

 **Francja**

* -

 **Grecja**

* Yianna Terzi - Oniro mou (ESC 2018)

 **Gruzja**

* Nina Sublatti - Warrior (ESC 2015)

 **Hiszpania**

* Amaia & Alfred - Tu canción (ESC 2018)

 **Holandia**

* -

 **Irlandia**

* -

 **Islandia**

* -

 **Izrael**

* -

**Szablon:Jugosławia**

* -

 **Kazachstan**

* Karakat Bashanova - Forever (JESC 2020)

**Szablon:Liban**

* -

 **Litwa**

* The Roop - On Fire (ESC 2020)

**Szablon:Luksemburg**

* -

 **Łotwa**

* -

 **Macedonia Północna**

* Andrea - Circles (ESC 2022)

 **Malta**

* Gaia Gambuzza - Diamonds in the Skies (JESC 2022)

**Szablon:Maroko**

* -

 **Mołdawia**

* -

**Szablon:Monako**

* -

 **Niemcy**

* Aly Ryan - Wear Your Love (Preselekcje ESC 2019)

 **Norwegia**

* -

 **Polska**

* Ochman - River (ESC 2022)

 **Portugalia**

* -

 **Rosja**

* -

 **Rumunia**

* Roxen - Alcohol You (ESC 2020)

 **San Marino**

* -

 **Serbia**

* Nevena Božović - Kruna (ESC 2019)

**Szablon:Serbia i Czarnogóra**

* -

 **Słowacja**

* -

 **Słowenia**

* Luma - All In (Preselekcje ESC 2022)

 **Szwajcaria**

* Sebalter - Hunter of Stars (ESC 2014)

 **Szwecja**

* -

 **Turcja**

* Sibel Tüzün - Süper Star (ESC 2006)

 **Ukraina**

* Tayanna - I Love You (Preselekcje ESC 2017)

**Szablon:Walia**

* -

 **Węgry**

* -

 **Wielka Brytania**

* -

 **Włochy**

* -
The New Queen

After the events of MedievalVibes and Beverlyjones defeat Machiavellian, the citizens of Far Far Away wondered who will be in charge of things now. Suddenly, an Italian Princess named Snow-White-Fire-Red came up and announced that she was Rapunzel’s cousin and that she was Prince Charming’s ex and she broke up with him because he was a “spoiled mama’s boy.” She also explained that Charming’s idea of having an ogre as the villain in his play came from her story and the story of Rapunzel’s famous ancestor, Petronsiella. She then proclaimed herself Queen Regnant of Far Far Away and everyone rejoiced, pleased they now have a ruler. Snow-White-Fire-Red broke tradition by being the first Queen of Far Far Away without a King. Even Beverlyjones and MedievalVibes rejoiced.