Cards Against Humanity/List of black cards

This is a list of **114 black cards** in the standard edition of *Cards Against Humanity*:

* In its new tourism campaign, Detroit proudly proclaims that it has finally eliminated \_\_\_\_\_.
* \_\_\_\_\_ is a slippery slope that leads to \_\_\_\_\_.
* What does Dick Cheney prefer?
* In L.A. County Jail, word is you can trade 200 cigarettes for \_\_\_\_\_.
* \_\_\_\_\_: Good to the last drop.
* What don't you want to find in your Chinese food?
* In M. Night Shyamalan's new movie, Bruce Willis discovers that \_\_\_\_\_ had really been \_\_\_\_\_ all along.
* \_\_\_\_\_: Kid-tested, mother-approved.
* What ended my last relationship?
* In Michael Jackson's final moments, he thought about \_\_\_\_\_.
* \_\_\_\_\_? There's an app for that.
* What gets better with age?
* In Rome, there are whisperings that the Vatican has a secret room devoted to \_\_\_\_\_.
* \_\_\_\_\_. Betcha can't have just one!
* What gives me uncontrollable gas?
* In the distant future, historians will agree that \_\_\_\_\_ marked the beginning of America's decline.
* \_\_\_\_\_. High five, bro.
* What has been making life difficult at the nudist colony?
* In the new Disney Channel Original Movie, Hannah Montana struggles with \_\_\_\_\_ for the first time.
* \_\_\_\_\_. It's a trap!
* What helps Obama unwind?
* Instead of coal, Santa now gives the bad children \_\_\_\_\_.
* \_\_\_\_\_. That's how I want to die.
* What is Batman's guilty pleasure?
* It's a pity that kids these days are all getting involved with \_\_\_\_\_.
* A romantic, candlelit dinner would be incomplete without \_\_\_\_\_.
* What never fails to liven up the party?
* It's a trap!
* After Hurricane Katrina, Sean Penn brought \_\_\_\_\_ to the people of New Orleans.
* What will always get you laid?
* Life for American Indians was forever changed when the White Man introduced them to \_\_\_\_\_.
* After the earthquake, Sean Penn brought \_\_\_\_\_ to the people of Haiti.
* What will I bring back in time to convince people that I am a powerful wizard?
* Life was difficult for cavemen before \_\_\_\_\_.
* Alternative medicine is now embracing the curative powers of \_\_\_\_\_.
* What would grandma find disturbing, yet oddly charming?
* Lifetime presents \_\_\_\_\_, the story of \_\_\_\_\_.
* And I would have gotten away with it, too, if it hadn't been for \_\_\_\_\_.
* What's a girl's best friend?
* Major League Baseball has banned \_\_\_\_\_ for giving players an unfair advantage.
* And the Academy Award for \_\_\_\_\_ goes to \_\_\_\_\_.
* What's my antidrug?
* Maybe she's born with it. Maybe it's \_\_\_\_\_.
* Anthropologists have recently discovered a primitive tribe that worships \_\_\_\_\_.
* What's my secret power?
* MTV's new reality show features eight washed-up celebrities living with \_\_\_\_\_.
* Betcha can't have just one!
* What's Teach for America using to inspire inner city students to succeed?
* Next from J.K. Rowling: Harry Potter and the Chamber of \_\_\_\_\_.
* BILLY MAYS HERE FOR \_\_\_\_\_!
* What's that smell?
* Next on ESPN2: The World Series of \_\_\_\_\_.
* But before I kill you, Mr. Bond, I must show you \_\_\_\_\_.
* What's that sound?
* Rumor has it that Vladimir Putin's favorite dish is \_\_\_\_\_ stuffed with \_\_\_\_\_.
* Coming to Broadway this season, \_\_\_\_\_: The Musical.
* What's the crustiest?
* Science will never explain the origin of \_\_\_\_\_.
* Dear Abby, I'm having some trouble with \_\_\_\_\_ and would like your advice.
* What's the gift that keeps on giving?
* Sorry everyone, I just \_\_\_\_\_.
* Due to a PR fiasco, Walmart no longer offers \_\_\_\_\_.
* What's the most emo?
* Studies show that lab rats navigate mazes 50% faster after being exposed to \_\_\_\_\_.
* During Picasso's often-overlooked Brown Period, he produced hundreds of paintings of \_\_\_\_\_.
* What's the new fad diet?
* That's right, I killed \_\_\_\_\_. How, you ask? \_\_\_\_\_.
* During sex, I like to think about \_\_\_\_\_.
* What's the next Happy Meal toy?
* The CIA now interrogates enemy agents by repeatedly subjecting them to \_\_\_\_\_.
* For my next trick, I will pull \_\_\_\_\_ out of \_\_\_\_\_.
* What's the next superhero/sidekick duo?
* The class field trip was completely ruined by \_\_\_\_\_.
* He who controls \_\_\_\_\_ controls the world.
* What's there a ton of in heaven?
* The socialist governments of Scandinavia have declared that access to \_\_\_\_\_ is a basic human right.
* How am I maintaining my relationship status?
* When all else fails, I can always masturbate to \_\_\_\_\_.
* The U.S. has begun airdropping \_\_\_\_\_ to the children of Afghanistan.
* I do not know with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with \_\_\_\_\_.
* When I am a billionaire, I shall erect a 50-foot statue to commemorate \_\_\_\_\_.
* This is the way the world ends \ This is the way the world ends \ Not with a bang but with \_\_\_\_\_.
* I drink to forget \_\_\_\_\_.
* When I am President of the United States, I will create the Department of \_\_\_\_\_.
* This season on Man vs. Wild, Bear Grylls must survive in the depths of the Amazon with only \_\_\_\_\_ and his wits.
* I got 99 problems but \_\_\_\_\_ ain't one.
* When I pooped, what came out of my butt?
* TSA guidelines now prohibit \_\_\_\_\_ on airplanes.
* I learned the hard way that you can't cheer up a grieving friend with \_\_\_\_\_.
* When I was tripping on acid, \_\_\_\_\_ turned into \_\_\_\_\_.
* War! What is it good for?
* I never truly understood \_\_\_\_\_ until I encountered \_\_\_\_\_.
* When I'm in prison, I'll have \_\_\_\_\_ smuggled in.
* What am I giving up for Lent?
* I wish I hadn't lost the instruction manual for \_\_\_\_\_.
* When Pharaoh remained unmoved, Moses called down a Plague of \_\_\_\_\_.
* What are my parents hiding from me?
* I'm sorry, Professor, but I couldn't complete my homework because of \_\_\_\_\_.
* While the United States raced the Soviet Union to the moon, the Mexican government funneled millions of pesos into research on \_\_\_\_\_.
* What brought the orgy to a grinding halt?
* In 1,000 years, when paper money is but a distant memory, \_\_\_\_\_ will be our currency.
* White people like \_\_\_\_\_.
* What did I bring back from Mexico?
* In a world ravaged by \_\_\_\_\_, our only solace is \_\_\_\_\_.
* Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar?
* What did the US airdrop to the children of Afghanistan?
* In an attempt to reach a wider audience, the Smithsonian Museum of Natural History has opened an interactive exhibit on \_\_\_\_\_.
* Why am I sticky?
* What did Vin Diesel eat for dinner?
* In his new selfproduced album, Kanye West raps over the sounds of \_\_\_\_\_.
* Why can't I sleep at night?
* What do old people smell like?
* In his new summer comedy, Rob Schneider is \_\_\_\_\_ trapped in the body of \_\_\_\_\_.
* Why do I hurt all over?