1984 Los Angeles 500

The 1984 Los Angeles 500 is race 31 of 1984 is best known Greg Candyman's first win (it was bad when he had a near-fatal crash at the Nightdona 500, but then turned out he won the LA 500). It was not all good however as a huge crash involving 14 cars on lap 130 put Andrew Axler out of commission for four races after he flew in the air on top of Barack Jones.  Greg Candyman won his first race and Alloy Wilson took 2nd with The King 3rd. Chick Hicks is fourth, Ernie Gearson fifth, sixth Murray Clutchburn, seventh Cole Speedland, eighth Don Chapcar and ninth belongs to Don Alternators. Andrew missed four races but did not get replaced.

## Race

On lap 130, many racers including The King were tightly battling on the second turn. Andrew Axler was in the middle with 353 THX car Barack Jones to his left and Bill Brady to his right. Barack and Andrew touched sending Andrew mounting on Barack before flying in what is one of the most spectacular airborne crashes. Andrew got the 4th highest air at thirteen meters above ground. As Andrew flew high and then landed hard onto the grass on his roof. Harold who was now damaged on his roof turned right and hit Bill Brady and took out Johnathan Melter, Tom Landis, James Cleanair, Ron Pitcar, Michael Smith, Sammy Smelter, among others, one being Mike Yankee! Harold's future wife and Claude's crush Misti Motorkrass was also involved along with Ronald Oaks and Rusty Cornfuel.

Andrew was taken by an ambulance immediately while Harold Axel described the moment as "This is one of my worst nightmares." Bill Brady also described the moment as "(Popeye toot) scary as hell."

## Transcript

### Andrew Goes Airborne!

Ned: AXLER AND JONES TOUCH! ANDREW MOUNTS OVER BARACK JONES AND I DON'T BELIEVE IT! I DON'T BELIEVE IT! HE GOES AIRBORNE! HIGH IN THE AIR HE GOES!

Ken: THIS IS SO HORRIFIC AND TRAUMATIZING TO EVERYBODY! JONES LANDS ON THE GRASS ON HIS WHEELS **HARD!**

(Bill Team Radio)

Bill: OH MY GOD! HOLY (Popeye toot)! THIS IS SO SCARY! HELP THIS IS SO SCARY SEEING HIM FLY!

(Harold Team Radio)

Barack: I think someone flew of me just now.

Barack's crew chief: Yup, copy that.

### Barack and Bill about Andrew

Lapis: Barack Jones and Bill Brady, what are your feelings about Andrew?

Barack: This is one of my worst nightmares.

Bill: (Popeye toot) scary as hell.

Lapis: Okay back to you Pinkie and Spike!

### Candyman Wins for the first time in his Career!

Ned: GREG CANDYMAN! CANDYMAN! TACH O MINT IS ABOUT TO WIN FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER! HAIL TACH O MINT! TACH O MINT! TACH O MINT! TACH O MINT!

Ken: I WOULD WANT TO BE WITH CANDYMAN RIGHT NOW! WE BOTH LOVE CANDY AND SWEETS!

(Greg Team Radio)

Greg: YES! YES! YEEESS!

James Van Wheeler: Well done! I am so proud of you! You made us win for the first time ever! (emotional) Thank you Candyman! Thank you so much!

Greg (emotional): I can't (Seal Bark) believe this! I WON! I WON! I GO TO VICTORY LANE!

(Live)

Ken: BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK!!!! THIS IS ALL TRUE! YOU'RE WATCHING THE LOS ANGELES 500 ON CBS SPORTS WITH GREG CANDYMAN'S FIRST VICTORY! He had a horrible crash at the Nightdona 500 but WON HIS FIRST RACE AT LA!!! BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK!!!

Ned: BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK!!! SEAL BARKS RULE!!! BEST CENSOR SOUNDS IN THE WHOLE (Popeye toot) WORLD!!! BETTER THAN POPEYE TOOTS!!! BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK!!!

## Results

1. Greg Candyman - 500 laps +45
2. Alloy Wilson - 500 laps +42
3. The King - 500 laps +41
4. Chick Hicks - 500 laps +40
5. Ernie Gearson - 500 laps +39
6. Murray Clutchburn - 500 laps +38
7. Cole Speedland - 500 laps +37
8. Don Chapcar - 500 laps +36
9. Don Alternators - 500 laps +35
10. Bernie Simpson - 500 laps +34