LabTech 101/Journal

**LabTech 101's journal** is an event log chronicled by LabTech 101. It was posted in the form of a thread titled **Journal of LabTech101** in the G-Corp guild and played a major part in the Halloween 2004 event.

### October 19th, first entry

> Posted: Tue Oct 19, 2004 12:04 pm
> **Tuesday, October 19th, 2004**
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> **11:49 am**
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> I've had a good morning! People always say that Tuesdays are a drag, but they obviously haven't worked in a secret underground test facility before!
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> Today, my boss LabTech247 showed me the new pets for our group. They are soooo cute!!  I can't believe that G CORP supplies us with pets for our own entertainment! That totally rawks my sawks!! I didn't even know that rabbits came in green and purple colors!
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> I also met the new guy LabTech722. He looks like a smart guy. Although everyone around here looks smart to me. They all talk about complex stuff like multiplication and stuff. I have no idea what they are talking about. But who cares?! I wORK in a SECRET UNDERGROUND TEST FACILITY!!
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### October 19th, second entry

> Posted: Tue Oct 19, 2004 6:19 pm
> **Tuesday, October 19th, 2004**
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> **1:35 pm**
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> LabTech247 just assigned me a REALLY IMPORTANT JOB!! He says that this job he's assigned me will determine the fate of our entire facility!! I feel so important!! I ABSOLUTELY LOVE working in a secret UNDERGROUND TEST FACILITY!!!  Gosh, I LOVE saying that... secret...underground...test...facility.... LOVE IT!!!! \*sigh\*
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> Ok, now I better finish filling out and sending out these FRFAREQR - 22 and FAREQR - 24 forms... our entire facility DEPENDS ON IT!!
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### October 19th, third entry

> Posted: Tue Oct 19, 2004 7:03 pm
> **Tuesday, October 19th, 2004**
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> **5:35 pm**
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> I just got an invite from LabTech957 to go hang out at his place on Saturday. I dunno though... his place kinda smells. Last time I was there, he insisted that it was because he lives near the reclamation facility... but that same smell follows him to work. I know!! maybe he can bring his Homer Infernut Table Setup to the SECRET UNDERGROUND TEST FACILITY!!!!
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### October 19th, fourth entry

> Posted: Tue Oct 19, 2004 11:23 pm
> **Tuesday, October 19th, 2004**
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> **10:52 pm**
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> Phew! Finally finished those filling out those forms for LabTech247... These forms took me roughly 8 hours to fill out. No wonder 247 told me the whole facility depended on it!
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> On my way to dropping off the forms at reception, I heard strange noises coming from LabTech126's office. Lots of thrashing and bumps against the wall type noises. Totally freaked me out.  I knocked on the door to see if everything was ok. I was sooooo relieved when 126 opened the door!
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> His clothes were all wrinkled as if he had been wrestling something. I saw LabTech912 behind him lifting the desk back up. Apparently, it had been knocked over. 126 explained to me that one of the 12 foot long purple boa constrictors had escaped its cage and that 912 had to help him wrestle it back into the cage. He said towards the end, the boa spit venom at 912 and almost hit her in the eyes!!  Man, I wish I was there to see that!  My boss 247 tells me that those boas can "crush a human head like a peanut." 126 and 912 must be really strong, not to mention brave too!
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> GOSH I LOVE WORKING IN A SECRET UNDERGROUND TEST FACILITY!!!
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### October 20th, first entry

> Posted: Wed Oct 20, 2004 11:38 am
> **Wednesday, October 20th, 2004**
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> **11:04 am**
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> Another fun and exciting morning here in the SECRET UNDERGROUND TEST FACILITY!! LabTech722 showed me his pet that the G CORP people gave him. It was a really cute monkey!! GOSH, G CORP is SOOO NICE TO US!!  Though, I think all the excitement got me all light-headed cause at some points I could've sworn I was seeing double of that monkey.
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> The new guy 722 is really nice and smart. He told me about how he was an investor and that he had this big deal going down later tonite and if I wanted in, now was the time. He told me that the minimum investment was 50,000 g and that the return would be double after only 10 years!!! AWESOME!! So, anyways, I pulled out my life savings and gave it to him. I can't wait!
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### October 20th, second entry

> Posted: Wed Oct 20, 2004 1:34 pm
> **Wednesday, October 20th, 2004**
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> **1:05 pm**
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> I'm getting a little scared. The little green bunny that G CORP gave me is missing.  I've searched everywhere for him and he's no where to be found.
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### October 20th, third entry

> Posted: Wed Oct 20, 2004 3:05 pm
> **Wednesday, October 20th, 2004**
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> **2:15 pm**
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> When I got back from lunch, I noticed that there was a big iron door blocking the door to the lab. My boss 247 was scratching his head as I approached him. He appeared to be thinking about something. So I asked him what had happened and he told me that the G CORP janitorial staff was doing spring cleaning. That's so nice of them! I LOVE WORKING FOR G CORP!  I kinda spilled some coffee on my desk yesterday and then today, they send in a WHOLE team to clean it up! Talk about NICE!!
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> I also asked 247 if he had seen my bunny. He told me that Grunny(so I liked to call him) was homesick and that he wanted to be with his family. He assured me that Grunny was in a better place now. I will miss Grunny, but I understand where he is coming from. I really missed my family when I started working here too.  Anyways, it would be selfish of me to keep him from his family.
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> Oh, I better find 722 to thank him. Earlier, I saw him with one of the janitors, so he must've totally helped out with the spring cleaning! The people here are soo NICE! I LOVE working in a SECRET UNDERGROUND TEST FACILITY!!
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### October 20th, fourth entry

> Posted: Thu Oct 21, 2004 8:00 am
> **Wednesday, October 20th, 2004**
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> **6:06 pm**
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> My boss 247 told me to bring one of the new shipment containers to the lab. This thing was pretty heavy. I was about to load it onto the forklift, but 957 told me he was going to take it home to finish setting up his Homer Infernut Table. Good thing I've got a strong back. I get it from my mom.
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> Anyways, I kind of underestimated the weight of the container and so, I was stumbling the whole way. While I was carrying it down to the stairwell, I noticed the light on the elevator door turned green when I got near.
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> I remember that whenever 247 or 062 walks by the elevator doors that the light turns green! I must've gotten a promotion!
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> So as I stumbled towards the door, it opened and I stepped in. Imagine my surprise as I fell forward into an empty shaft!  It was SOOOO FUN!! Like barreling down the tunnels of one of those water parks when I was 7.  I must've descended about 10 levels before the shaft finally shot me out into this area I had never been in before.
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> It was lit with all green lights, and there were gigantic tubes filled with neon colored liquids. As I got closer, I noticed that there were all kinds of different pets floating in the tubes.
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> As I stepped closer, suddenly, the room turned red and a loud siren went off!
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> "GET BACK TO YOUR PLAYSTATIONS IMMEDIATELY! SENORITY LEVEL ONE HAS BEEN REACHED. PLEASE WAIT TO POST UNTIL G CORP SENORITY VERIFIES YOUR DENTURES." (whatever that means)
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> At that point, a bunch of men in black, padded suits came into the room. One of them knocked me in the head with a black, wooden stick. That wasn't very nice.  They asked me what I was doing in here, andI told them I was just moving the large container to the lab and got lost. One of the other men yelled at me, saying something like,"YEH RIGHT you lousy piece of--" But, at that moment, my boss 247 came in and told the bad men to go away. I was on the verge of tears at this moment and I asked 247 why they were keeping pets in here. He told me that this place was where the rich pets sleep and that these men are paid to guard them and that they are very protective of the pets because of this. That is so cool! I wish I had people to guard me like this when I go to sleep. When I go to sleep at home, I'm afraid of the monsters underneath my bed. But yeah, 247 told me that I shouldn't come down here anymore for my own good. I agree.
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> My head still hurts a bit. I could use some coffee right about now and maybe some marshmallows. I wonder where I left my cup of coffee?
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### October 21st

> Posted: Thu Oct 21, 2004 2:58 pm
> **Thursday, October 21th, 2004**
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> **1:45 pm**
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> Finally finished moving all the large containers into the lab storage area. After that I decided to take a break, so I went to the break room to get some coffee. On my way there while I was passing 138's desk, I felt a tug on my sleeve. It was 138 and she looked all excited. She said,"Hey 101! Check out my new paperweight!" It appeared to be sculpted out of gold and shaped like a circular tube. The middle of it was clear like glass, and every so often, a spark would shoot from one end to the other like bottled lightning! I was like,"COOL!!!"  I asked her where she got it, and she said she found it. Gosh, she's so lucky to find cool stuff like this. All I ever found was a pet sleeping room and all I have to show for it is this bump on my head.
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> I finally got to the breakroom and opened my locker. To my surprise, my coffee mug was missing!  Yeah, the cool looking one with the Japanese symbol for "Ten" or "Heaven." I got that mug back in the day when I used to play Street Fighter. Akuma was my favorite character. Sigh... anyways... I suppose the theme of today is some people are lucky enough to find cool stuff, and others just lose cool stuff they already have.
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### October 22nd

> Posted: Sat Oct 23, 2004 11:53 am
> **Friday, October 22nd, 2004**
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> **7:05 pm**
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> Wow, it's been quite a long day. Apparently, I had only finished moving a quarter of the shipment. So anyway, I've been working real hard getting the rest of the containers into 247's lab. This would've been much easier had I had access to the forklift, but ah well.
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> So, after finishing all of that, you can imagine I got pretty tired. So, I noticed in one of the rooms in 247's lab, 909, 912, and 126 were all lying down asleep on these cool looking metal beds. At that moment, 247 tapped me on the shoulder and i turned around. I asked him what everyone was doing sleeping here and he told me that it was a new company policy to take naps during the day(like they do in Europe). I think he called it "siesta" or something like that. So anyways, he then asked me if I'd like to take a nap as well. And I was like,"BOY WOULD I!"
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> So, next thing you know I wake up in my chair. I felt TOTALLY refreshed!  Man, G CORP is treating us better all the time! Plus, when i got up 722 told me that he invested my life savings in a deal that promises to return 98687987547534957 gold in 150 years!! GOSH I LOVE working in a SECRET UNDERGROUND TEST FACILITY!
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### October 26th

> Posted: Tue Oct 26, 2004 4:12 pm
> **Tuesday, October 26th, 2004**
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> **3:03 pm**
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> OMG I just woke up and everyone is telling me that it is Tuesday.  Gosh, must've been all that moving of large metal containers I did all last week.
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> Today life in the secret underground test facility has gotten a little weird. I mean, normally I absolutely LOVE working in a secret underground test facility, but today everyone is acting all weird. I think it might have to do with all the naps everyone is taking. As my mom used to say, "too much of a good thing can be bad for you." Well, everyone is kinda cranky today. I saw 137 in his cube today making really aggressive looking poses with his arms and hands. It was almost like he was trying to hold onto some kind of imaginary weapon or something.  I mean, I used to make believe all the time, but we're working in a secret underground test facility for gosh sakes.
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> Then, as I was heading down the hall, I noticed 138 looking in the mirror. She was also acting strange. When she came in today, I first noticed her with a hat on. And then every other time throughout the day, she had more and more things on her head(like a flower, or a hair clip, or glasses, etc). I could've sworn by the end of the day, she would've just toppled over from all the weight on her head!
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> Anyhoo, maybe it's just me. I feel so tired today.... so drained. I also noticed that my hands are all raw. The skin on the pads of my palms seems irritated. What have I been doing all weekend!?
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### October 27th

> Posted: Thu Oct 28, 2004 12:06 am
> **Wednesday, October 27th, 2004**
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> **11:35 pm**
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> I just woke up at my desk!  OMG, it's 11:30 already!
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> Gosh, where has the day gone? I've been walking around the secret underground test facility... it seems everyone has gone home. Except for my boss 247. I can hear the clickity-click-click of his keyboard. 247 isn't looking so good.  His face is all pale and he looks like he's sweating alot.
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> OMG my hands!  The skin seems to be ripping off on my palms but it doesn't hurt. OMG I've got like pads on my palms! This is sooo cool! Kinda like those pads on the bottoms of rabbits feet. Whoa... this is SOOOO cOOL!!  My daddy was a mechanic for 30 years before he retired, and he had the strongest, toughest hands. He always told me that if I wanted to have strong hands like him that I'd have to put them through heck. Gosh, all that moving really paid off! Look at me now dad!
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### October 30th, first entry

> Posted: Sat Oct 30, 2004 1:33 am
> **Saturday, October 30th, 2004**
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> **1:12 am**
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> I dunno why but I'm still at work. All the labtechs are running around like they are getting prepared for something. My boss 247 tells me that Gambino is throwing a big party later today. I think Gambino is also celebrating 062's retirement at sometime during the party.
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> I'm pretty excited myself. 062 is my favorite uncle. In fact, it was he who got me working here in the secret underground test facility!
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> I hope I have time to get ready for the party. 247 says I need to move another 150 containers from sub level 29 to sublevel 13 all by tonite.  I guess worst case is that I'll show up to the Halloween party dressed up like a scientist!  I wonder who else will be there... I hear Mr.Gambino throws the biggest parties!
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### October 30th, second entry

> Posted: Sat Oct 30, 2004 11:38 am
> **Saturday, October 30th, 2004**
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> **11:18 am**
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> GOSH, I'm still not done moving all the containers... another 5 to go... man, my extra padded palms have really carried me through this. And all that working out, I feel really REALLY strong! Ahh.. the benefits of working in a secret underground test facility!
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> I saw on the GAIA 9 ACTION news that Gambino's party is gonna be huge! Like the largest house party Gaia has ever known! I'm so stoked!!! UWAAAH!!!! Ok OK, gotta finish moving stuff so I can make it. This is gonna be SOO COOL!!!
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> --
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> Ouch... when moving that last container, I tripped in my excitement and the container broke open. I'm covered in this green liquid. I think I swallowed some of it too... gah. I feel kinda dizzy. Gosh, I better clean this up. I can't look like this at the party...
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### October 30th, third entry

> Posted: Sat Oct 30, 2004 2:25 pm
> **Saturday, October 30th, 2004**
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> **2:07 pm**
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> Gosh, I arrived at the party a little late... boy the place was PACKED.
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> I've never seen so many people crowded into one place! And man, I've heard about stories of Gambino's Mansion being big... but this place was literally HUGE! Like I think I counted like 3487274374289 people there!
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> Anyways, when i arrived, I really had to go pee cause I had been holding it in since I was in such a hurry to move all those containers. I went to where there was supposed to be a bathroom, but inside there were a bunch of naked people playing around with soaps and foam and stuff... that was really embaressing...
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> So, then I found this place where all of these l33t looking people were hangin out. I think they called themselves MODels. I asked them where the bathroom was and a few onf them pointed me in different places... so confusing... one guy was trying to tackle me and ask me about some kind of green vial... Crazy MODels... maybe they are addicted to some drug that keeps them all skinny for their photoshoots. Anyways... must find...bathroom....
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### October 30th, fourth entry

> Posted: Sat Oct 30, 2004 3:13 pm
> **Saturday, October 30th, 2004**
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> **2:57 pm**
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> SO many people... I think I just saw my boss 247 dancing in the garden... crazy... I've never seen him so happy before.
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> I love parties... they always seem to bring out the best in people!
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## Sources

1. ↑ GaiaOnline.com, "Journal of LabTech101". Archive (page 1), (page 2) (October 30th, 2023)