American Dicks

**American Dicks** is the eleventh episode of the first season.

## Plot

The Tacoman detective agency, the only agency not affected by the nationwide detective strike, becomes the focus of the reality TV show *American Dicks* who are looking to solve their 100th case. Eventually, Duckman gets a case; the mission is to find the mayor.

## Notes

* The following message appears before the episode:

* *WARNING: The following program is a realish documentary, and may contain language which is vulgar, offensive, or grammatically awkward. Such language has been censored whenever possible, but for the sake of higher ratings, we may have let a few gratuitous and especially titillating instances slide.*
	+ ​Mayor Whitman is named after Mae Whitman, the daughter of Pat Musick, who voiced both Fluffy and Uranus
	+ *American Dicks* is a parody of *Cops,* though the host at the beginning of the show is more similar to *America's Most Wanted.*
	+ The sweater Duckman gives Charles and Mambo to make up for missing their recital reads; *Donna Summer Live*. Donna Summer was a pop singer from the 1970's and 80's often cited as the queen of disco.
	+ Both Bernice's and Ajax's outfits worn in this episode were featured on a series of *Duckman Pogs.*

## Continuity

* The only time in the series Ajax insults Charles and Mambo.
* The mayor that appears in this episode is later replaced by the female mayor, Mayor Galagher
* First mention in the series of Charles and Mambo playing the tuba.

## Main Characters

* Tacoman
* Clifford
* Bonnie

## Quotes

**Tacoman**: Fluffy! Uranus! Where the fuck is my coffee!? Aren't you little assholes realize I want my goddamn coffee first thing every motherfucking morning!? And if I don't fucking get it now, I'm gonna kick your furry little asses out of here! So, get me the goddamn coffee!!! *[realizes the camera man walked in during his rant]* Oh, heh heh. Shit. Guess you'll cut that.

**Tacoman**: Uh, this is my camera-shy, much less experienced, and generally easy to ignore partner, Clifford.

**Clifford**: Hey mother.

**Bonnie**: I knew that cocksucker didn't quit smoking!!!

**Tacoman**: Fortunately, I graduated magnum come and get me from the university of the streets! And by streets, I mean MEAN streets!

**Ajax**: Look a chocolate bar! Eww. This isn't a chocolate bar.

**Tacoman**: What do ya think of that Corny? You're working for the Biggest American Dick ever!

**Tacoman**: If there's the feted funk of crime within a mile of here I'll smell it out.

**Tacoman**: Mayor Whitman!! The man who brought honesty & fairness to municipal politics, the man who cleansed city hall of corruption, the man I voted for SIX times in the last election?

**Tacoman**: Don't respect you? ... I brought you the hand towel didn't I?

**Clifford**: Before I met Tacoman I was at a crossroads, soul searching, looking for my place in this endless puzzle we call life. You ever wake up in a Cambodian gaming parlor and realize you were living in a dark dank abyss of emptiness & loneliness, then wander the mountains of Asia for two years until you became the chef in a Tibetan monastery?

**Cameraman**: I just asked what kind of detective Tacoman is.

**Clifford**: Oh!

**Fluffy**: Mr. Tacoman your carton of Itch-away Rectal Cream just arrived and your test results are here. The doctor hasn't identified your lesions but he's ruled out cold sores!