B017 PAX 2019

PAX West Cast

> "*This gig is getting hairy.*"
> ― Butylene O'Kipple
>
>

**PAX 2019** is the seventeenth bonus episode for Queens of Adventure. It was recorded as part of the PAX West 2019 convention. In it, the queens race against the clock to complete a quest and resolve a hairy situation. It was later re-released as the eight episode of Queens of Adventure legends.

## Synopsis

*For the full summary of the episode, please see the Legends episode page.*

 Arson, Butylene, Fraya, and Irene, make camp on their way to the annual Enchanted Wig Market, but awaken in a pink brick lined work room. A Giant Baby appears floating before them saying they will be tested for Legendary potential as the walls fall away, revealing the room floats above a forrest

The group jumps off the platform, using gliders to landin some ruins. From a trash can emerges a sassquatch, a Trashquatch, who tells them to check the nearby treasure chests. After some antics, they open all three to find their equipment and a scroll of polymorph.

As the storm reaches the edge of the ruins, Irene tries to take their new friend with them. The trashquatch seems resistant until Irene explains she is trying to rescue him.

The group journey to a wide chasm cutting across the area, with evidence of a former bridge. From inside a nearby hut emerges a Sassquatch, who explains the bridge will appear if they all give a little sass. Within moments the group has read the Sassquatch and each other to filth and the bridge appears. The Sassquatch warns about them about the Skunk Ape before dancing into his vanishing hut.

The path on the other side leads near a foul smelling cave A shaggy figure emerges and charges them. After several rounds of battle, Fraya uses the scroll of polymorph to turn the monster into a tiny Cousin It. They leave it behind as the storm chases them.

They emerge from the forest to find a lit clearing with an elevated runway. Around the runway are an audience of Sasquatches, including those they encountered before. Another group of drag queens emerge from another direction into the clearing, snarling.

The Giant Baby welcome both groups, Booty and the Hofish, and House Effluvia. They are the only two teams to make it to the Runway of Trials. House Effluvia strut out onto the catwalk and begin posing and cast side eye. Fraya shapes water to turn the catwalk icy, tripping them up.

The party's turn: Fraya defrosts the runway, Butylene plays the squatch's favorite song, and the group poses in the end.

The Giant Baby says they are the most interesting candidates he has ever tried. After the queens state what makes them Legendary, the Giant Baby asks the audience for the final approval. The crowd goes wild with shouts of Squatch.

Reality ripples and the queens wake up at their campsite, wondering if it was all a dream until they see a gold Cousin It shaped trophy with a sign: 'until next year, candidates'.

### Characters

#### Party

* Arson Nicki - drider warlock
* Butylene O'Kipple - tiefling alchemist
* Fraya Love - water genasi cleric
* Irene Dubois - lizardfolk barbarian

#### NPCs

* Giant Baby
* Sasquatches (including)
	+ Trashquatch
	+ Sassquatch
	+ Skunk Ape
	+ Various Other Audience Squatches including hippies and Yetis
* House Effluvia
	+ Claire DeRunway
	+ Jenna Sais-Quoi
	+ Holly Mackerel
	+ Busty Stringcheese

## Episode Notes

### Lore

* The Giant Baby's quest for potentially Legendary adventurers may be an annual event.

### Inspiration Earned

* Butylene - Signature Move - Hurling a Bomb
* Arson - Signature Move - Sipping Ice Coffee
* Irene - Signature Move - tongue twirling
* Fraya - Signature Move - mouth pop
* Arson - Terrifying the Rabbit
* Fraya - Her read of the Sassquatch
* Irene - Her reads of Fraya and Arson
* Arson - Her read of Butylene
* Butylene - Her retort to Arson's read
* Fraya - freezing the runway
* Audience - for beginning to shout Squatch

### Memorable Quotes

* "Since I am one of the gay, my signature move is sipping ice coffee." - Arson Nicki
* "I'm the reason Old Macdonald goes E-I-E-I-O, Fraya Love." - Fraya Love
* "You are going to give me this key ring right now or else I'm going to do something really bad that I haven't quite figured out yet! But it's going to be really fucking bad." - Arson Nicki
* "This rabbit had better pay by taxes and clear my skin with that fucking roll!" - Arson Nicki
* "With all that voguing you have unstuck yourself." - "I gotta say being gay is pretty great." - DM Matt and Arson Nicki
* "Don't make me roll for that. I rolled a natural 20 when she tried to come for me." - Fraya Love
* "I love professional basketball." - "You've already busted open that herbalism kit, I see!" - Butylene O'Kipple and Irene Dubois
* "Are you ready to make shape water useful for once, Fraya?" - Arson Nicki
* "You've been thrown." - Irene Dubois
* "I know I didn't have to, but just in case you were going to ask me, I rolled a natural 20." - Fraya Love
* "Are you saying anything to him?" - "I am absolutely silent but I'm making a lot of eye contact. And I think he's into it." - DM Matt and Irene Dubois
* "I'm *rescuing* you." - "You know we've made these assumptions before and it didn't end well." - Irene Dubois and Fraya Love
* "Girl, here I was trying to be nice and say that you had bo-ho chic going on for you but look at you with your teeny tiny shoes and mismatched patches." - "We're never getting across." - Fraya Love and Irene Dubois
* "Fraya Love: You love shaping water, bitch. I'm going to give you some foam so you can learn to shape that body." - Irene Dubois
* "Arson Nicki: You and that pact weapon seem awfully close. I wish you and some makeup would make a pact." - Irene Dubois
* "Butylene, I know you do a lot of visual research, and I'm so impressed your makeup looks like it was inspired by a two-year olds crayon drawings." - Arson Nicki
* "It's called art, Arson, look it up." - Butylene O'Kipple
* "This location is like an elaborate metaphor for my sex life." - Arson Nicki
* "Did we just red rover red rover?" - Fraya Love
* "The power of queer community helped you to withstand..." - DM Matt
* "The spirits are me stumbling cause I'm drunk." - Irene Dubois
* "All we have to do is not fall." - "Good luck, Fraya!" - Fraya Love and Irene Dubois
* "Ar-can you? You can!" - Arson Nicki
* "I think the squatches have it." - Fraya Love

### References

* Sesame Street
* Catch These Hands
* Mary-Kate Olson
* Sylvester Stalone
* Rocky Movies
* Rocky Horror Picture Show
* Cousin It - Addams Family
* Showgirls & Crystal Connors
* Silky Nutmeg Ganache's readiness to lipsynch in Drag Race Season 11
* Nancy Kerrigan and Tanya Harding
* Charlie's Angels

### Name That Tune

* "California Girls" - Beach Boys
* "Age of Aquarius" - HAIR!
* "Firework" - Katy Perry

## Behind the Queens

* This episode is the quickest turn around time between live show recording and episode release at 10 days.
* The panel was recorded at the PAX West 2019 convention in Seattle. The recurring element of Sasquatches was inspired by the fact that the panel was in the Sasquatch Theater at the convention.
* House Effluvia's team are a reference to the most recent San Francisco cast show, Children of the Cornball. Their names come from a youtube live stream comment of DM Matt's during the Patreon Preview Weekend.
* This episode was re-released in the main feed of the podcast a month after its release in the bonus feed, while the cast was in Chicago for live shows and a regular episode could not be edited in time for release. This makes this episode the first to be in both feeds. In March 2020, the main feed was restructured and this episode was removed from it, and moved to Queens of Adventure Legends. This makes it the first, and only episode to appear in all three feeds: Main, Legends, and Bonus.

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**Operation Watersport**: Ch1 - Ch2 - Ch3 - Ch4 - Ch5 - Ch6 - Ch7 - **Trials**: Ch1 - Ch2 - Ch3 - Ch4
**Ghosts of the Coast**: Ch1 - Ch2 - Ch3 - **The Devil's Due**: Ch1 - Ch2 - Ch3 - Ch4
**Special**: The Story So Far
**The Beautiful Place**: Ch1 - Ch2 - Ch3 - Ch4 - Ch5 - Ch6 - **A Dance in the Dark**: Ch1 - Ch2 - Ch3 - Ch4
**Drama in the Deep**: Ch1 - Ch2 - Ch3 - Ch4 - Ch5 - Ch6 - **Whispers From the Heart**: Ch1 - Ch2 - Ch3 - Ch4 - Ch5 - Ch6
**Danger Rangers!**: Ch1 - Ch2 - Ch3 - Ch4 - Ch5 - Ch6
**Mist Connections**: Ch1 - Ch2
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Live Shows: Seattle Style -- Minneapolis Style