recursal/Fanatic-Fandom huggingface dataset:
Hamilton

*"wham bam thank you ham"*

*--Cam Cain*

## Eulogy 1

*By Gregory Severin*

Hamilton, Ontario is a port city on Lake Ontario

It was invented by George Hamilton after he bought a shitload of land from some guy after the war of 1812

Hamilton is home to McMaster University, which is apparently a top-5 Canadian university

The Wikipedia page for Hamilton links to not one but three crime families active in the city

Former Maple Leafs defenseman and donut magnate Tim Horton is from Hamilton; the city boasts the original franchise

Other Hamiltonian athletes include George Owen, supposedly the first NHL player to ever wear a helmet

## Eulogy 2

*By Cam Cain*

Hamilton is a large city about 30 miles southwest of Toronto

It is Canada’s 9th largest city and Ontario’s 3rd largest

It was founded by Mr. Hamilton when he purchased a couple of farms following the War of 1812. It started out small but quickly grew in the mid 19th century

Hamilton is Canada’s steel city, and 60% of Canada’s steel comes from there. The steel chains on the flag represent steel

Hamilton’s Canadian Football team, the Tiger-Cats, date back to 1869 as the nation’s first team. Their unusual name is because they’re the result of a merger between two teams called the Tigers and the Wildcats. They’ve won 8 Grey Cups, but they currently have the longest drought and in 2003 they went an all-time worst 1-17

People from Hamilton include comedian Martin Short, drummer Neil Peart, folk singer Stan Rogers, basketball player Shai Gilgeous-Alexander, and a whole host of hockey players including Hall of Fame winger Dave Andreychuk, Hall of Fame goalie Ken Dryden, and Red Wings D-man Ben Chiarot

## Tournament

As the 165 seed, Hamilton was defeated by the Faroe Islands in Round 3 Matchup 19 of FlagVote 2. As the 83 seed, it was defeated by Suffolk in Round 3 Matchup 112 of FlagVote 3 after previously defeating St. Petersburg Florida.

## Results

### FlagVote 2

**Round 1:** Win over (348) Palmyra Atoll 6-1

**Round 2:** Win over (92) Brazil 4-1

**Round 3:** Loss to (37) Faroe Islands 4-2

### FlagVote 3

**Round 1:** BYE

**Round 2:** Win over (430) St. Petersburg Florida 6-5

**Round 3:** Loss to (339) Suffolk 6-4
Grand Cape Mount County

*"Who left a giant turd on the Grand Cape Mount County flag"*

*--Zach Betron*

## Eulogy

*By Cam Cain*

Grand Cape Mount County is a county in northwestern Liberia, bordering Sierra Leone and the Atlantic Ocean

The capital of the county is Robertsport, named after first Liberian president Joseph Jenkins Roberts

It takes its name from Cape Mount, a hill located in the county

Lake Piso, the largest lake in Liberia, is located in GCM County. Nearly 200 people died when an overcrowded boat sank on the lake in 2002.

## Tournament

As the 489 seed, Grand Cape Mount County was cleanly swept by NATO in Round 1 Matchup 48 of FlagVote 2. As the 732 seed, it was defeated by Essex in Round 1 Matchup 111 of FlagVote 3.
Eli Anderson

## Prince Eli Anderson

Eli is sensitive & introverted, He has a bit of a secretive past, Eli is the twin brother to **Elliott Anderson** and he the son to **Iona Anderson** but he doesn't know who is dad is as his mother refuses to let him know anything about his farther, Eli is the grandson to **Elsa,**

## Biographical information

### Home

* Arendelle (Birthplace & Hometown)
* The magic city (current resident)

### Profession

* Student at firelight school of magic
* Prince of Arendelle

## Personal information

### Family

**Elliott Anderson (Brother), Iona Anderson (Mother), Elsa (Grandmother), Isla Anderson (Cousin), Lola Anderson (Cousin)**

### Allies

Queen Mal Dark, Princess Audrey Beauty, Evie Queen, Eve Queen, FG, Calista Jane "CJ" Hook, Beau Dark, Uma Shrimpie,
China

## Eulogy 1

*By Cam Cain*

The People’s Republic of China is the world’s most populous country

It is one of the world’s oldest civilizations, dating back at least to the 21st century BC

Since then it has grown into one of the world’s largest economies

China has the world’s four largest cities, and it has eleven cities larger than New York City

Regions of the country are currently under watch for the Coronavirus, which has kinda become a big deal

## Eulogy 2

*By Gregory Severin*

China is a place in Asia

It is very big and has many people

China has invented many cool things, like fireworks and gunpowder

China also invented Confucianism and Taoism, two very different schools of thought which have nonetheless both had important bearing on Eastern philosophy

For a hot sec in the, like, 1950s there was serious debate over whether China or Taiwan was the real China. The international community eventually reached consensus, and spoiler alert: it isn't Taiwan

The first Chinese emperor thought that ingesting mercury would make him immortal. He died to mercury poisoning

Many cool places are in China, including the Forbidden City, the Terracotta Army, and Tibet

Notable people from China include Yao Ming, Yo-Yo Ma, and Jets running back Michael Carter

## Tournament

China was defeated by Bonaire in Round 1 Matchup 39 of FlagVote. As the 133 seed, it was defeated by Czech Republic in Round 2 Matchup 34 of FlagVote 2 after previously defeating South Sudan. As the 191 seed, it was defeated by Guyana in Round 2 Matchup 136 of FlagVote 3.

## Results

### FlagVote 2

**Round 1:** Win over (380) South Sudan 6-1

**Round 2:** Loss to (124) Czech Republic 5-2

### FlagVote 3

**Round 1:** BYE

**Round 2:** Loss to (322) Guyana 8-1

## Trivia

The first mention of Coronavirus in the Slack came on January 31st 2020 as part of China's eulogy.
Bern

## Eulogy

*By Cam Cain*

This is the flag of the city and canton of Bern, Switzerland

The city is the de facto capital and fifth largest city in the country. I say de facto because no Swiss city has the official designation of capital. However, the Swiss Federal Council, who collectively act as head of state in Switzerland, meet in Bern

The canton of Bern is Switzerland’s second largest by both area and population. The popular resort town of Interlaken is also located within the canton

Emmentaler cheese, known by us as Swiss cheese, comes from Bern. The holes in the cheese are bubbles of carbon dioxide

The bear has been used as a symbol of Bern since at least the early 13th century. Legend has it that when Duke Berthold V was chopping down trees to build the city, he promised to make the first animal he saw the city’s animal. The first animal he saw was a bear, so here we are

Otto Hess, the only major leaguer to be born in Switzerland, comes from Bern. He was a decent pitcher and occasional outfielder for the Cleveland Naps and Boston Braves in the early 1900s

## Tournament

As the 427 seed, Bern was defeated by Cordoba in Round 2 Matchup 255 of FlagVote 3 after previously defeating Taiwan. As the 11 seed, it was defeated by Sword Bear in Round 1 Matchup 8 of BearFlagVote.

## Results

### FlagVote 3

**Round 1:** Win over (598) Taiwan 8-3

**Round 2:** Loss to (86) Cordoba 8-1
Bangladesh

## Eulogy 1

*By Cam Cain*

Bangladesh is a country in South Asia

It is the eighth most populated country in the world despite its small size. Bangladesh has three times as many people as California in one third of the area.

It was known as East Pakistan before declaring independence from the country in 1971

It has important international relations with India and Japan

The most popular sport is cricket, and the team reached the quarterfinals of the Cricket World Cup in 2015

The bungalow originated in Bangladesh

## Eulogy 2

*By Gregory Severin*

Bangladesh is a country mostly east of India. I say "mostly" because India surrounds it on three sides, but MOST of India is west of Bangladesh

Its capital Dhaka is one of the most populated, and most densely populated, cities in the world, and the Greater Dhaka area is considered to be the most densely populated urban area in the world

Back when they were partitioning India, nobody really knew what to do with Bengal Province, which was had substantial religious diversity. As you can imagine, this made it hard to figure out who should be partitioned where. Eventually, they decided to turn half of the province into East Pakistan

The Bangladesh of today didn't really enjoy being East Pakistan, and after the repression of Bengali politicians following the 1970 election, war broke out. Genocide also broke out, and though Bangladesh won its independence in 1971, as many as three million Bengali people were killed

Much of the world's largest mangrove forest is in Bangladesh, and this gives it incredible biodiversity. Species like the clouded leopard, saltwater crocodile, and (naturally) Bengal Tiger

Bangladesh is particularly vulnerable to climate change, and due to the ongoing genocide of the Rohingya people in neighboring Myanmar it has one of the largest refugee populations in the world

Notable people with Bangladeshi heritage include Salman Khan of Khan Academy, the former lead guitarist of one-hit wonder The Zutons, and the lady who won Miss Alaska in 2019. Boxer Muhammad Ali was a Bangladeshi citizen, having received an honorary passport there in 1978

## Tournament

Bangladesh was defeated by Brazil in Round 2 Matchup 42 of FlagVote after previously defeating Monaco. As the 290 seed, it was defeated by Maryland in the Style of Croatia in Round 1 Matchup 247 of FlagVote 2. As the 567 seed, it was defeated by South Uist in Round 2 Matchup 181 of FlagVote 3 after previously defeating Malawi.

## Results

### FlagVote

**Round 1:** Win over Monaco 5-1

**Round 2:** Loss to Brazil 5-0

### FlagVote 2

**Round 1:** Loss to (223) Maryland in the Style of Croatia 4-3

### FlagVote 3

**Round 1:** Win over (458) Malawi 6-5

**Round 2:** Loss to (55) South Uist 8-2
Eastern Equatoria

## Eulogy

*By Cam Cain*

Eastern Equatoria is a state in the Southeast corner of South Sudan within the larger region of Equatoria

From 1972 to 2020, the state was divided into two smaller states: Imatong and Namorunyang.

It borders the nations of Kenya, Uganda, and Ethiopia. It is also home to South Sudan’s claim on the Ilemi Triangle, a disputed zone. Kenya has de facto control over the region, but it is also claimed by South Sudan.

Eastern Equatoria is one of the last known hotbeds of Guinea worm disease

## Tournament

As the 713 seed, Eastern Equatoria was defeated by Vietnam in Round 1 Matchup 55 of FlagVote 3.
Colorado

## Eulogy

Colorado is the 38th state of the United States, becoming a state in 1876. This led to the name the "Centennial State."

It's called Colorado because of the red color that the major river in the region has (Colorado R. - color-rojo, Colorado).

Noted for it's (sic) mountainous regions, it attracts millions of tourists from around the world, but agriculture and technology provide a large economic output.

The US Air Force Academy is also located in Colorado Springs, and lots of government contracting work can be found in that region as well.

Contrary to "popular belief," the flag is more than just a dot on a bedsheet (smh). The blue symbolizes the clear blue skies (Colorado boasts 300 days of sunshine per year, so claims NWS). The white represents the snow atop the lofty Rocky Mountains. The red represents the red soil found all across CO, and the gold represents the abundant sunshine.

Jolly Ranchers were invented in Colorado.

Oh! Notable Coloradans include Amy Adams, Lon Chaney, Condoleezza Rice, John Kerry, members of The Fray, and half of OneRepublic (who went to a high school 3 minutes from mine).

## Tournament

Colorado was defeated by Mexico in Round 3 Matchup 15 of FlagVote after previously defeating Syria and Kenya. As the 35 seed it was defeated by South Korea in Round 5 Matchup 12 of FlagVote 2.

## Results

### FlagVote

**Round 1:** Win over Syria 7-0

**Round 2:** Win over Kenya 6-2

**Round 3:** Loss to Mexico 5-2

### FlagVote 2

**Round 1:** Win over (475) Suriname (1959-1975) 6-0

**Round 2:** Win over (219) Dardania 6-1

**Round 3:** Win over (91) North Korea 4-1

**Round 4:** Win over (27) Phoenix 4-3

**Round 5:** Loss to (6) South Korea 5-2
Grenada

*"feels like it should be mentioned in the song kokomo but it actually isn’t"*

*--Cam Cain*

## Eulogy

Grenada is an island nation in the Caribbean, north of Trinidad and Tobago and south of St. Vincent and the Grenadines

It consists of the main island of Grenada as well as the smaller islands of Carriacou and Petite Martinique. Petite Martinique is named as such because the original settler (there was no native population as far as we know) was a man named Pierre from Martinique, and Petite Martinique was smaller than his homeland

Grenada was colonized by the French in the mid 17th century and ceded to England following the Seven Years War. They declared their independence on February 7th 1974, the same day former Pirates outfielder Adrian Brown was born

In 1979, on the same day Johan Santana was born, Maurice Bishop staged a coup and declared himself prime minister, banning all other political parties. Four years later, the United States invaded and murdered him, something the UN did not appreciate. Bishop seems like a charismatic guy who did some good things for the country, but the whole cancelling elections thing isn’t very nice

It is known as the “Island of Spice” due to its high production of nutmeg. Grenada produces 40% of the world’s nutmeg. Their national soccer team is nicknamed the Spice Boys. Every one of them is Sporty.

Sprinter Kirani James won Grenada’s first Olympic gold medal by winning the 400 meters in London in 2012. He followed that up by winning silver in 2016 and bronze in 2020 in the same event

## Tournament

Grenada was defeated by Tonga in Round 1 Matchup 93 of FlagVote. As the 352 seed, it was defeated by the Netherlands in Round 1 Matchup 11 of FlagVote 2. As the 566 seed, it was defeated by Soviet Lithuania in Round 1 Matchup 246 of FlagVote 3.

## Results

### FlagVote 2

**Round 1:** Loss to (161) Netherlands 4-1

### FlagVote 3

**Round 1:** Loss to (459) Soviet Lithuania 6-3
French Guiana

## Eulogy

*By Gregory Severin*

French Guiana is the part of France that is in the Guianas in northeast South America. This may sound like I'm being facetious, but French official policy is that all of their overseas territories are as much a part of France as France is

This neat little tidbit is also why the longest border France has with any other country is with Brazil, why there's a part of mainland South America with membership in the European Union, and why Wikipedia can technically describe France as a transcontinental country

The region had been settled by the French as early as 1503, but French Guyana didn't draw much interest until it began to be developed as a penal colony in the 1800s

The European Space Agency utilizes French Guiana for many of its launches, and an estimated 16% of French Guiana's GDP comes from the launch site somewhat comically referred to as "Europe's Spaceport"

Former Washington Wizards center Kevin Séraphin is from French Guiana's capital city of Cayenne

## Tournament

French Guiana was defeated by Finland in Round 2 Matchup 11 of FlagVote after previously defeating Qatar. As the 289 seed it was defeated by Iraq in Round 1 Matchup 10 of FlagVote 2. As the 545 seed it was defeated by Betsy Ross in Round 1 Matchup 12 of FlagVote 3.

## Results

### FlagVote

**Round 1:** Win over Qatar 4-2

**Round 2:** Loss to Finland 8-0

### FlagVote 3

**Round 1:** Loss to (480) Betsy Ross 6-5
Bahamas

## Eulogy

*By Cam Cain*

The Bahamas is an archipelago in the West Indies

Though it is a sovereign country, its ruler is Queen Elizabeth

It became a haven for freed slaves in the first half of the 19th century

Its economy is largely based on tourism, and an additional 19% is listed as “unclassified transactions”

The outer islands participate in a folk magic called Obeah, although it is technically illegal

Only six major leaguers have come from the Bahamas, none of whom have been particularly successful. However, top prospects Kristian Robinson and Jazz Chisholm could be Bahamian stars

## Tournament

The Bahamas were defeated by North Macedonia in Round 3 Matchup 2 of FlagVote. As the 16 seed, it was defeated by Aruba in Round 3 Matchup 8 of FlagVote 2.

## Results

### FlagVote

**Round 1:** Win over Nigeria 4-0

**Round 2:** Win over United States 5-4

**Round 3:** Loss to North Macedonia 4-3

### FlagVote 2

**Round 1:** Win over (497) Grand Kru County 6-0

**Round 2:** Win over (272) Hungary 7-0

**Round 3:** Loss to (144) Aruba 4-3
Colombia

*"You mean Colombia. Columbia is the capital of South Carolina"*

--Gregory Severin

## Eulogy 1

*By Cam Cain*

Colombia is a country in South America bisecting the equator

Its capital Bogotá is the fifth largest city in the Americas

Colombia takes its name from Christopher Columbus

Spanish colonials pillaged the country in search of El Dorado

Colombia declared its independence from Spain in 1810

24 Major Leaguers have come from Colombia, most notable (sic) Edgar Renteria and Orlando Cabrera

## Eulogy 2

*By Gregory Severin*

Colombia is a South American country on both the Pacific and Atlantic Oceans. It also has several overseas departments I was not aware about, including an archipelago off the coast of Nicaragua

Apparently it has the best healthcare system in the Americas. Canada in shambles

Simón Bolívar liberated Colombia from Spanish rule, as he did most other South American countries, and established Gran Colombia, which collapsed about a decade later. True to its name, Gran Colombia was big. It consisted of all of mainland Colombia, Ecuador, Venezuela, and Panama, and also had parts of Peru and Brazil. Every now and again a goof like Hugo Chavez will call for its restoration, but that's probably not happening anytime soon

The country has also been fighting a "war" for almost sixty years against a combination of far-left guerrillas, far-right paramilitaries, and drug cartels. I put "war" in quotations because it's apparently low-intensity, whatever that means. Also because since 2016 there's been a peace agreement in place between one of the above groups, but not all of them. Also the DEA is pretty involved because why wouldn't they be

Colombia is also the second-most biodiverse country in the world, behind only Brazil. It has more birds than any other country, and has the highest rate of endemic species in the world

Notable Colombians include Nobel Laureate author Gabriel García Márquez, whose magical realism genre has simultaneously confused and enthralled audiences worldwide, actress Sofia Vergara, former Red Sox shortstops Edgar Renteria, Orlando Cabrera, and Jeter Downs, singer and noted truth-teller Shakira, and reliever Reiver Sanmartin

## Tournament

Colombia was defeated by neighboring Panama in Round 1 Matchup 82 of FlagVote. As the 420 seed, it was defeated by Lebanon in Round 1 Matchup 117 of FlagVote 2. As the 494 seed, it was defeated by Nordic Estonia in Round 2 Matchup 217 of FlagVote 3 after previously defeating Rhode Island.

## Results

### FlagVote 3

**Round 1:** Win over (531) Rhode Island 6-5

**Round 2:** Loss to (19) Nordic Estonia 8-1
Ghana

*"Black Stars are Ghana go far this tournament"*

*--Cam Cain*

## Eulogy 1

*By Gregory Severin*

The Republic of Ghana is a country in West Africa

The Prime Meridian passes through Ghana, and it is the closest to the (0, 0) coordinates of any country

It was known as the British Gold Coast from 1867 to its independence 90 years later

Ghana has a booming film industry and frequently collaborates with Nollywood, or Nigerian Hollywood

Ghana's soccer team became only the third African country to reach the FIFA World Cup quarterfinals in 2014. In 1992, their third-place finish at the Barcelona Olympics made them the first African country to win an Olympic medal in soccer

Lions and Seahawks defensive end Ziggy Ansah was born in Ghana

## Eulogy 2

*By Cam Cain*

Ghana is a country in West Africa on the Gulf of Guinea

Ghana is the closest country to the 0 latitude 0 longitude point in the Atlantic Ocean. It is also home to Lake Volta, the world’s largest artificial reservoir by surface area

In 1957, it became the first Sub-Saharan African country to achieve sovereignty from a colonial power, in their case the United Kingdom. Since then, it has been very influential in decolonisation efforts around the continent

The word Ghana means ‘king’ or ‘warrior.’ It takes its name from the Ghana Empire, a medieval empire in modern-day Mali and Mauritania

Ghana is one of the more successful democracies in Africa, and it ranks the continent’s fifth least fragile and corrupt nation. Ghanaian diplomat Kofi Annan was secretary general of the UN from 1997 to 2006

Ghana’s national soccer team reached the Round of 16 in the 2006 World Cup and made it all the way to the quarterfinals in 2010. They also won bronze at the 1992 Olympics. They have won 3 individual bronze medals and 1 silver at the Olympics, all in boxing. In 2010, Kwame Nkrumah-Acheampong, also known as the snow leopard, became the first and only Ghanaian to compete at the Winter Olympics when he finished 47th out of 102 competitors in the slalom

## Tournament

Ghana was defeated by Mexico in Round 2 Matchup 30 of FlagVote after previously defeating El Salvador. As the 138 seed, it was defeated by the Jolly Roger in Round 3 Matchup 56 of FlagVote 2. As the 181 seed, it was defeated by the Qing Dynasty in Round 3 Matchup 60 of FlagVote 3 after previously defeating Adygea.

## Results

### FlagVote

**Round 1:** Win over El Salvador 4-1

**Round 2:** Loss to Mexico 3-2

### FlagVote 2

**Round 1:** Win over (375) Niger 7-0

**Round 2:** Win over (119) Yamaguchi 4-3

**Round 3:** Loss to (10) Jolly Roger 5-1

### FlagVote 3

**Round 1:** BYE

**Round 2:** Win over (332) Adygea 10-1

**Round 3:** Loss to (76) Qing Dynasty 7-2
Birzebbuga

## Eulogy

*By Gregory Severin*

Birzebbuga is a town in southeast Malta

Its name means "well of olives" in Maltese, so it must have some pretty good agriculture

Hippo fossils have been found in the town

The Malta Summit, a meeting held in 1989 between Gorbachev and GHW Bush where they declared the end of the Cold War, took place in Birzebbuga

This is the old Birzebbuga flag, they changed it to an olive branch and blue chevron pattern in 2006

## Tournament

As the 606 seed, Birzebbuga was defeated by Franco-Columbians in Round 1 Matchup 208 of FlagVote 3.

## Results

### FlagVote 3

**Round 1:** Loss to (419) Franco-Columbians 7-4
Chad

*"RIP Tschad Tschadley"*

*--Andrew Beaudoin*

## Eulogy 1

*By Cam Cain*

Chad is a country in north central Africa

It has a diverse environment; the north is dominated by the Sahara, while the south is full of savannas

It is split roughly evenly between Muslims and Christians

It was a French territory until declaring independence in 1960

It is one of the poorest and most corrupt countries in the world, and the drama in neighboring Sudan has not helped

## Eulogy 2

*By Gregory Severin*

Chad, or Tchad if you're French, is a country in North/Central Africa

It is named for Lake Chad, which is the second-largest wetland in Africa. In the Paleolithic Era Lake Chad was an inland sea known as lake MEGACHAD, and it shrunk about 95% from the sixties to late nineties. However, it appears to have been improving since then

When Chad was a French colony the French didn't really care about it, and once the French left it sort of imploded. I don't think it's ever had a peaceful transition of power in the 63 years it's been independent, and its neighbors Libya and Sudan (now South Sudan) keep doing things that further destabilize it

Ex-President Hissène Habré was the first former head of state to be convicted of human rights abuses by a different country's national court, which happened while he was living out his exile in Senegal. His successor, who coup'd him in 1990, served as President until 2021, when he died in battle

The similarity between Chad's flag and Romania's flag has caused surprisingly little friction. Chad did ask the UN to consider it an issue back in 2004, but Romania doesn't want to give up the tricolor and that's probably an argument the Romanians will win. In any case, the lack of any real sense of Chadian national identity means that people in the country don't really care what flag they use

## Tournament

Chad was defeated by Guatemala in Round 2 Matchup 26 of FlagVote after previously defeating Mayotte. As the 236 seed, it was defeated by Iceland in Round 2 Matchup 41 of FlagVote 2 after previously defeating Rhode Island. As the 319 seed, it was defeated by Maryland in the Style of Croatia in Round 2 Matchup 134 of FlagVote 3 after previously defeating Grand Gedeh County.

## Results

### FlagVote

**Round 1:** Win over Mayotte 5-2

**Round 2:** Loss to Guatemala 6-2

### FlagVote 2

**Round 1:** Win over (277) Rhode Island 5-2

**Round 2:** Loss to (21) Iceland 5-0

### FlagVote 3

**Round 1:** Win over (706) Grand Gedeh County 8-2

**Round 2:** Loss to (194) Maryland in the Style of Croatia 7-4
Crimea

## Eulogy 1

*By Cam Cain*

**Crimea** is a peninsula on the northern edge of the Black Sea

Russia kinda stole Crimea from Ukraine in 2014, and it’s still under dispute

It was also part of the Byzantine Empire and sacked by Mongols and Ottomans

Crimea was the site of the Yalta Conference at the end of World War II

   The largest city in the peninsula is Sevastopol, located right on the sea

## Eulogy 2

*By Gregory Severin*

Crimea is a peninsula at the tip of the Black Sea

Historically it was considered the frontier of the classical empires, having been at the fringe of both Roman and Byzantine imperial control

The Russian Empire annexed the peninsula from the Ottomans in 1783, and it ended up being a focal point for a couple of wars in 100 or so years that followed. Russia still managed to keep control of it, though. They really seem not to like it when Crimea isn't under their control

Anyway, administration of Crimea was transferred to the Ukrainian SSR back when people still thought the Soviet Union was "totally a good idea" and "in no danger of falling apart." Since both of those things were in fact false, Crimea ended up becoming a part of independent Ukraine in 1991. However, Russia really doesn't like it when Crimea isn't under their control, so Putin illegally annexed it again in 2014

Putin also built a bridge connecting Crimea to mainland Russia, but the Ukrainians blew it up a few weeks ago

In 2016, a Crimean Tatar woman named Jamala won the Eurovision Song Contest with a song about Stalin's deportation of the Crimean Tatars in the 1940s

## Tournament

As the 318 seed, Crimea was cleanly swept by Italy in Round 1 Matchup 135 of FlagVote 2. As the 687 seed, it was defeated by Northern Territory in Round 1 Matchup 161 of FlagVote 3.

## Results

### FlagVote 3

**Round 1:** Loss to (338) Northern Territory 9-1
Guernsey

*"there will be no gurney for guernsey"*

*--Cam Cain*

## Eulogy 1

*By Gregory Severin*

Guernsey is an island off the coast of Normandy

It is located in the Channel Islands archipelago, alongside (Old) Jersey

Guernsey cows are notable for their rich dairy production

The world's first underwater arrest took place in Guernsey, after a mollusk poacher was apprehended by a scuba-diving police officer. Blub blub, motherfuckers

Gold medal equestrian Carl Hester was educated in Guernsey, and Grammy-winning DJ Mura Masa was born on the island

## Eulogy 2

*By Cam Cain*

The Bailiwick of Guernsey is a British island in the English Channel

Honestly most of the stuff I just said about Jersey applies to Guernsey also, but don’t let them hear that. Guernseymen refer to Jerseymen as toads, and Jerseymen refer to Guernseymen as donkeys

Guernsey also has its own dying Norman language: Guernésiais. As of 2001, only 2.2% of the island was fluent in the language

During the Middle Ages, pirates would hide out on the island and intentionally ground nearby ships using the lamping technique: a specific term that I can only find on this Wikipedia page and other sites who pull the quote directly from this Wikipedia page. Even today, the surrounding waters are dangerous for sailing, but this is due to rocky cliffs and weird tides

Geologically, the southern part of the island is older and higher lying than the northern part. There have been multiple rounds of intrusion and deformation. The island itself didn’t separate from mainland France until about 7000 years ago

Victor Hugo lived on the island for 15 years after getting kicked out of Jersey. It was here that he wrote Les Miserables.

## Tournament

Guernsey was defeated by Dr. Congo in Round 3 Matchup 32 of FlagVote. As the 103 seed, it was defeated by Slovakia in Round 3 Matchup 52 of FlagVote 2. As the 204 seed, it was defeated by Jayuya in Round 2 Matchup 118 of FlagVote 3.

## Results

### FlagVote

**Round 1:** Win over Belize 6-0

**Round 2:** Win over Honduras 6-1

**Round 3:** Loss to Dr. Congo 4-3

### FlagVote 2

**Round 1:** Win over (410) Cataño 5-1

**Round 2:** Win over (154) Solomon Islands 5-2

**Round 3:** Loss to (26) Slovakia 4-1

### FlagVote 3

**Round 1:** BYE

**Round 2:** Loss to (309) Jayuya 7-4
Christmas Island

*"santa ono has just been photographed leaving the president's mansion, never to return"*

*--Gregory Severin*

## Eulogy 1

*By Cam Cain*

Christmas Island is an Australian territory off the coast of Indonesia

Most of the 1800 residents have Chinese origins by way of Malaysia and Singapore

The island was discovered by Europeans in 1615. It wasn’t named until 1643 when it was named on Christmas Day. It was permanently settled two centuries later

The flag depicts the Southern cross, a golden bosun, and the shape of the island. The flag was chosen from a field of 69 entrants, and the designer was awarded $100 AUD

The island features rich animal and plant life, as well as rich phosphate deposits

## Eulogy 2

*By Gregory Severin*

Christmas Island is an Australian territory in the Indian Ocean

Together with the Cocos (Keeling) Islands it forms the Australian Indian Ocean Territories; Christmas Island is the

Like the Galapagos, the relative isolation of the island has led to a ton of endemic species, and naturalist organizations have a vested interest in trying to Save Christmas('s unique biodiversity)

The island was first explored in 1857, two centuries after it was first discovered and named

In 2001, Christmas Island was the site of a controversy where the Australian government prevented a Norwegian ship from letting over 400 asylum-seekers disembark and claim refugee status; the controversy seriously hurt the Australian Labour Party in the subsequent elections

Since 1899 there has been a significant guano mining industry on the island

## Tournament

Christmas Island was defeated by Namibia in Round 1 Matchup 4 of FlagVote. As the 450 seed, it was defeated by Germany in Round 1 Matchup 249 of FlagVote 2. As the 641 seed, it was defeated by Caqueta in Round 1 Matchup 4 of FlagVote 3.
Fuck the Commish

*"Rob Manfred is still a bitch"*

--Sahil Shah

Fuck the Commish is a Slackbot command in the M-SABR Slack. The command responds "fuck the commish" after a variety of inputs, including "Manfred," "Selig," "Goodell," and "Mountain Landis". Much to Cam Cain's chagrin, the Slackbot does *not* trigger after mentions of A. Bartlett Giamatti. It was created on August 19, 2021 by Gregory Severin after yet another terrible decision by MLB commissioner Rob Manfred prompted Sully to ask him for a Scott Boras-style "Fuck Rob Manfred" command. After seeing sparse use through the end of the 2021 season and beginning of the offseason, the bot exploded in popularity as Manfred continued to antagonize MLB players, fans, and basically everyone but the owners on several occasions leading up to and during the 2021-2022 MLB lockout.

## Triggers

Rob **Manfred** (MLB commissioner 2014-)

Bud **Selig** (MLB commissioner 1992-2014)

Kenesaw **Mountain Landis** (MLB commissioner 1905-1922)

Gary **Bettman** (NHL commissioner 1993-)

Roger **Goodell** (NFL commissioner 2006-)

**David Stern** (NBA commissioner 1984-2014)

**Adam Silver** (NBA commissioner 2014-)
Brockville

## Eulogy 1

*By Cam Cain*

Brockville is a town in the Thousand Islands region of Eastern Ontario

It is home to the Brockville tunnel, the first train tunnel in Canada. It closed in 1970 and was recently reopened as a pedestrian tunnel

Industrial company 3M operates three factories in Brockville

The town has two bridges that cross the St. Lawrence river into America

## Eulogy 2

*By Gregory Severin*

Brockville is a city in Eastern Ontario that borders New York

It was formerly known as Elizabethtown, but changed its name after the War of 1812 to honor Major-General Isaac Brock

The city has revitalized its tourism sector, taking advantage of its location on the St. Lawrence River to offer several tours and river cruises of the 1000 Islands region

Golden Knights and former Kings and Canucks defenseman Ben Hutton is from Brockville, as is Jane Fonda's mother

## Tournament

As the 391 seed, Brockville was defeated by the Maori flag in Round 1 Matchup 196 of FlagVote 2. As the 577 seed, it was defeated by Uzbekistan in Round 1 Matchup 7 of FlagVote 3.

## Results

### FlagVote 3

**Round 1:** Loss to (448) Uzbekistan 6-5
Curacao

## Eulogy 1

*By Cam Cain*

Curaçao is an island in the Caribbean belonging to the Netherlands

It is only 40 miles north of Venezuela

It is known for its colorful buildings in the Dutch style

The official language is Papiamentu, a creole which has been influenced by Dutch, French, and Portuguese

In 2004, a team from Curaçao won the Little League World Series with a lineup that included Jurickson Profar and Jonathan Schoop

Other major leaguers from Curaçao include Andruw Jones, Ozzie Albies, Kenley Jansen, and Andrelton Simmons

## Eulogy 2

*By Cam Cain*

Curacao is a Caribbean island next to Aruba and Bonaire, making it the C of the ABC islands

It has been ruled by the Netherlands since the Eighty Years War, but it has a lot of autonomy now

Unlike most tropical islands, Curacao has a lot of cacti and other desert vegetation

Curacao has the oldest synagogue in the Americas. It was built by Spanish and Portuguese Jews all the way back in 1659

Not far off the coast of Curacao is the Blue Edge, where the seabed drastically drops 200 feet. It’s a popular spot for scuba divers

Curacao loves baseball, and All Stars Andruw Jones, Kenley Jansen, and Ozzie Albies are from there. In 2004, Curacao won the Little League World Series with a lineup including Jurickson Profar and Jonathan Schoop

## Tournament

Curacao was defeated by Hong Kong in Round 1 Matchup 121 of FlagVote. As the 28 seed, it was defeated by Fukuoka in Round 3 Matchup 20 of FlagVote 2. As the 163 seed, it was defeated by Thailand in Round 3 Matchup 124 of FlagVote 3 after previously defeating Chile.

## Results

### FlagVote 2

**Round 1:** Win over (485) Azad Kashmir 6-0

**Round 2:** Win over (284) Singapore 5-0

**Round 3:** Loss to (101) Fukuoka 4-2

### FlagVote 3

**Round 1:** BYE

**Round 2:** Win over (350) Chile 8-2

**Round 3:** Loss to (94) Thailand 7-4
Denmark

## Eulogy

Denmark is a Scandinavian country in Northern Europe

Its flag, the Dannebrog, is the oldest continually used national flag, it supposedly fell from the sky during a 13th century battle against Estonia

Denmark and Sweden "hate" each other, having gone to war against each other more times than any other two nations in the world. Now they just have spirited sports rivalries

Denmark had a pretty big empire after colonizing a bunch of places nobody wanted to live in; these include Greenland, Iceland, and the Faroe Islands

The "sport" of handball originated in Denmark, and the men's team won gold in Rio. Cycling is another popular Danish sport

Notable Danes include the author of the Little Mermaid and Frozen, Lars Ulrich of Metallica, film director and hack Lars von Trier, and Mads Mikkelsen, who played the bad guy in Casino Royale

## Tournament

Denmark was defeated by Czech Republic in Round 3 Matchup 27 of FlagVote after previously defeating Paraguay and Azerbaijan. As the 56 seed it was defeated by Albania in Round 4 Matchup 5 of FlagVote 2.

## Results

### FlagVote

**Round 1:** Win over Paraguay 5-1

**Round 2:** Win over Azerbaijan 6-1

**Round 3:** Loss to Czech Republic 5-2

### FlagVote 2

**Round 1:** Win over (457) Zanzibar 6-1

**Round 2:** Win over (201) Ulster 5-0

**Round 3:** Win over (73) California 5-2

**Round 4:** Loss to (9) Albania 5-1
Gabon

## Eulogy 1

*By Cam Cain*

Gabon is a country on the west coast of Africa

Petroleum has made it one of the richest countries in Africa, but leading (sic) to massive income inequality

Gabon declared its independence from France in 1960. Since then it has had just three “presidents”, the first two of whom served until their deaths

There was an attempted coup this January [2019]. The result is still unclear

Arsenal star Pierre-Emrick Aubameyang plays for Gabon’s national team. Though he was born in France, his father hails from Gabon and was captain of the squad

## Eulogy 2

*By Cam Cain*

Gabon is a country on the west coast of central Africa

It was colonized by the French who founded the creatively named city of Franceville in the 1860s. Franceville has still not changed its name, and it is one of the country’s most populous cities

The country was led as a one-party state by Omar Bongo from 1967 until his death in 2009, upon which his son Ali took over. Ali led until he was coup’d which happened *checks notes* seven days ago. It’s an ongoing situation, but on Monday military officer Brice Oligui was named president.

Oil represents over 80% of Gabon’s exports. Like many oil-producing nations, Gabon has a high GDP per capita, but that’s very concentrated at the top with severe income inequality

Gabon’s national soccer team peaked at a ranking of 30th in the world in 2009. They are led by longtime Dortmund and Arsenal striker Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang, whose 30 international goals are the most in Gabonese history

Gabon is believed to be the best place in the world to catch tarpon

## Tournament

Gabon was defeated by the US Virgin Islands in Round 1 Matchup 62 of FlagVote. As the 302 seed, it was defeated by Murmansk Oblast in Round 1 Matchup 141 of FlagVote 2. As the 144 seed, it was defeated by Hong Kong in Round 4 Matchup 5 of FlagVote 3.

## Results

### FlagVote

**Round 1:** Loss to US Virgin Islands 4-3

### FlagVote 2

**Round 1:** Loss to (211) Murmansk Oblast 4-3

### FlagVote 3

**Round 1:** BYE

**Round 2:** Win over (369) Peru 9-2

**Round 3:** Win over (113) Arizona 7-1

**Round 4:** Loss to (16) Hong Kong 9-1
Indonesia

## Eulogy 1

*By Cam Cain*

Indonesia is the fourth most populous country in the world

It is comprised of over 17,000 islands; Java is the largest of them and the most populated island in the world

Indonesia declared independence from the Netherlands in 1945, and it was recognized four years later

Indonesia and Monaco have the same flag, except Indonesia’s is slightly wider

The 1883 eruption of the volcano Krakatoa was one of the deadliest events in human history

## Eulogy 2

*By Gregory Severin*

Indonesia is an archipelagic state consisting of over 17000 islands in Southeast Asia

Notable islands with an Indonesian presence include Sumatra in the west, Java, the most populous island in the world, and parts of Borneo and New Guinea

For many centuries today's Indonesia was a major trading center, and host to Hindu and Buddhist kingdoms before Muslim traders and European colonizers spread their religions to the region. The ethnic, religious, and cultural diversity mean that the concept of one Indonesian nation is relatively new, and it didn't develop one coherent national identity until the 1900s

The Dutch were the dominant European power on the archipelago since the 1600s, but they spent a lot of their time trying to suppress fledgling rebellions. Indonesia declared independence after the end of World War II, and the subsequent revolution was met with heavy Dutch resistance and lasted for four years

Despite being very densely populated in areas, and one of the highest populated countries worldwide, Indonesia is home to a ton of biodiversity. It is second only to Australia in terms of how many endemic species it has, including the Komodo dragon, Sumatran tiger, and orangutan

Indonesia also has a ton of volcanoes and earthquakes due to its tectonically unstable location in the Pacific Ring of Fire. The 1883 explosion of Krakatoa let loose a shockwave that circled the world three times over, dropped the global temperature nearly a full degree Fahrenheit, and produced some remarkably vivid sunsets (see: Munch's The Scream)

Indonesia's most successful sport is badminton, and with the exception of 2012 it has never lost Olympic gold at that event

The current Indonesian president looks remarkably like Barack Obama

## Tournament

Indonesia was defeated by Kosovo in Round 1 Matchup 96 of FlagVote. As the 315 seed it was defeated by Lombardy in Round 1 Matchup 186 of FlagVote 2. As the 555 seed, it was defeated by Mozambique in Round 1 Matchup 254 of FlagVote 3.

## Results

### FlagVote 3

**Round 1:** Loss to (470) Mozambique 9-2
Canary Islands

*"Cats better anyways"*

*--Yuki Mori*

## Eulogy

*By Cam Cain*

The Canary Islands are an overseas territory of Spain

The name of the islands comes from the Latin word for dog, and the islands were said to have massive quantities of dogs during Roman times. The native canary bird is actually named after the islands, not the other way around

The largest and most populous of the islands is Tenerife, which is one big party and attracts people from all over

Teide, located on Tenerife, is the highest peak in all of Spain. Measured from its base, it is the third tallest volcano in the world. It is also the 8th most visited national park in the world, although I can’t find a full list

In the 60s and 70s, there was an independence movement in the Canary Islands. The group wanted to eschew the islands’ Spanish colonial history in favor of their previous Arab colonial history, prioritizing the speaking of Berber languages. They set off a bunch of bombs on the island in 1977. For that reason, they were never particularly popular and disbanded in 1979.

Tenerife’s north airport was the site of the deadliest aviation accident in history when two jets collided on the runway in foggy conditions

2010 World Cup winners David Silva and Pedro hail from the islands. As does Alfredo Cabrera, who had two plate appearances for the 1913 Cardinals in the middle of a lengthy career in Cuba

## Tournament

The Canary Islands were defeated by Estonia in Round 3 Matchup 27 of FlagVote. As the 145 seed, they were defeated by Argentina in Round 3 Matchup 5 of FlagVote 2. As the 171 seed, they were defeated by Cordoba in Round 3 Matchup 128 of FlagVote 3 after previously defeating Angaur.

## Results

### FlagVote

**Round 1:** Win over Guinea-Bissau 6-1

**Round 2:** Win over Tennessee 4-3

**Round 3:** Loss to Estonia 5-2

### FlagVote 2

**Round 1:** Win over (368) Yemen 5-1

**Round 2:** Win over (112) Venezuela 4-2

**Round 3:** Loss to (17) Argentina 6-1

### FlagVote 3

**Round 1:** BYE

**Round 2:** Win over (342) Angaur 6-5

**Round 3:** Loss to (86) Cordoba 8-3
East Germany

## Eulogy 1

*By Gregory Severin*

The German Democratic Republic, or Deutsche Demokratische Republic (GDR/DDR) was a socialist state that existed from 1949 to 1990

After the Second World War, Germany was split into four main zones controlled by France, the UK, the US, and Russia. The Russian part became the DDR, colloquially known as East Germany

Its capital city of Berlin was also divided into four zones, and in 1961 the DDR built a wall around the whole of West Berlin to prevent East Germans from fleeing the regime through claiming asylum there

Following massive demonstrations against the ruling communist party throughout 1989, the country officially joined the Federal Republic of Germany on October 3, 1990, and the DDR ceased to exist

## Eulogy 2

*By Cam Cain*

Die Deutsche Demokratische Republik was a country in the eastern part of Germany

It was established as a communist nation in the part of Germany that was occupied by the Soviets during World War II. Learning Russian was mandatory in East German schools

The city of Berlin, located in the eastern part of Germany, was split in half so that West Germany could have a part too. In 1961, East Germany built a wall in the middle of Berlin so people would stop escaping

East Germany was very successful in many sports, but this is believed to largely be due to massive state-sponsored doping in the 1970s and 80s.

The wall eventually fell, and Germany reunited. The East still has had many issues in the meantime though. Many East Germans still resent the west. $3 trillion had to be spent to repair crumbling infrastructure which had been neglected. The former East Germany also has far higher percentages voting for both far left or right wing extremist parties.

## Tournament

As the 280 seed, East Germany was defeated by NATO in Round 2 Matchup 24 of FlagVote 2 after previously defeating Nigeria. As the 259 seed, it was defeated by Canada in Round 3 Matchup 97 of FlagVote 3.

## Results

### FlagVote 2

**Round 1:** Win over (233) Nigeria 5-2

**Round 2:** Loss to (24) NATO 6-1

### FlagVote 3

**Round 1:** Win over (766) Perry County 11-0

**Round 2:** Win over (254) Jordan 6-4

**Round 3:** Loss to (3) Canada 8-2
Adygea

## Eulogy 1

*By Gregory Severin*

The Republic of Adygea is a constituent republic of the Russian Federation located in the Caucasus

It is an enclave of another of Russia's federal subjects, the exquisitely named Krasnodar Krai

The region is one of the poorest parts of Russia and is heavily agricultural

The 12 stars on the flag represent the twelve individual tribes of Adygea, and their gold color are supposed to represent the wheat harvest

2018-19 Hart Trophy winner Nikita Kucherov of the Tampa Bay Lightning is from the Adygean capital of Maykop

## Eulogy 2

*By Cam Cain*

Adygea is a republic in the Caucasus region of western Russia

It is the home of the Circassian people, although they now form just 25% of the republic’s population. They are an indigenous group in the region, but they were genocided by the Russian Empire in the 19th century. The majority of them now live in Turkey, who have totally never done their own genocide of a Caucasian people

The region has rich soil and produces grain and sunflowers

LTIR legend Nikita Kucherov was born in Adygea’s capital of Maykop. Maykop gives its name to the Bronze Age Maykop culture, known for its animal figurines and terrace architecture. They were among the first people to create the wagon wheel

Adygea uses the Circassian flag, which has been in use as a symbol of the Circassian people for nearly 300 years. The stars represent the 12 provinces of Circassia, and the arrows represent a proverb which means “peace if you are my friend, war if you attack me”

## Tournament

As the 191 seed, Adygea was defeated by Serbia in Round 2 Matchup 126 of FlagVote 2 after previously defeating Sealand. As the 332 seed, it was defeated by Ghana in Round 2 Matchup 120 of FlagVote 3 after previously defeating the British Indian Ocean Territory.

## Results

### FlagVote 2

**Round 1:** Win over (322) Sealand 4-2

**Round 2:** Loss to (66) Serbia 4-2

### FlagVote 3

**Round 1:** Win over (693) British Indian Ocean Territory 10-1

**Round 2:** Loss to (181) Ghana 8-2