Christ-massacre/Dialogues

***Previously, in Xashus…***

Ganika: Crap! De Luca has escaped the premises! Quick, we need to chase him!

Ryan: Guys…I think we have a problem…

Ryan: Our plane has been sabotaged!

Ganika: Great, now that our plane is sabotaged, what should we do? How do we chase De Luca, or even get to Mongolia?!

Ryan: Beats me, but-

Ash: Guys, did you see that? The reindeer, the sleigh, and that man in red…Isn't that Santa Claus?

Ganika: Santa? What is he even doing here?

Ash: Look, he's getting closer!

Santa: Hohoho! Greetings, IPS. How's your Christmas?

Ganika: Hey, Santa…Well, I don't celebrate Christmas, but it's been great, although we need help right now.

Santa: Yes, I know. But I also need your assistance, IPS. It's the only reason why I came here to visit you, otherwise, I'll be delivering gifts somewhere else.

Santa: I'll explain later in my sleigh. For now, join me up here. And for the remaining members, I have a private omnibus for you to take since my sleigh won't bear all of you at once.

***Present time, in the skies…***

Santa: Is this your first time experiencing what it feels like to ride a sleigh across the skies, Ms. Abasto? You look unwell.

Alexa: Yeah…I'm not that well when it comes to getting exposed to the sky where nitrogen is higher compared to oxygen…Not to mention the cold.

Alexa: But at least I can experience something exciting, unlike Spyro right here.

Spyro: Yeah, yeah, whatever. I don't give two f\*cks about Christmas, nor Santa. If it wasn't for the help, I wouldn't even try riding this crappy vehicle!

Santa: Ah, Mr. Perriades, my boy. Soon, you'll learn the spirit of Christmas…

Santa: Alright, we're almost there, in Xi'an!

Spyro: You're taking us to…China? Santa, are you senile? We want to go to Mongolia, not China!

Santa: I will take you there soon, but remember, I'm asking for your help to take care of something in China. It's a business I must handle.

Santa: For now, you can take your time in Xi'an for a while. Now time to make the landing!

***Xi'an, China…***

Spyro: Okay, Santa, why don't you tell us what business you have here?

Santa: Nothing shady, I promise you, folks. You can explore if you want since I'll be going from now on.

Santa: Another piece of advice, keep your spirits up, folks. Christmas is all about joy and happiness, not dismay!

Santa: Alright, I'll be back in five minutes. See you, hohoho!

Spyro: My goodness, how annoying. Who cares about this dreadful holiday? All I get from Christmas is nothing but disaster!

Tashard: You're entitled to your opinion, son. I don't mind the holiday, but work will always be my number one priority.

Tashard: To kill off time, I'll be giving the rest of the team free time to explore and celebrate the merry of this holiday. Let's wait till Santa comes back.

***20 minutes later…***

Spyro: Okay, it's been 20 minutes already, and that snotty old man hasn't returned yet! Geezer, you got any ideas?

Tashard: Your guess is as good as mine, son. I agree, this is taking too long.

Tashard: Since Ganika is busy having a party with the rest, you'll be the one who investigates the town's local eatery with the detective, Spyro. Santa was last seen heading there.

Spyro: Me again? F\*ck it. Rookie, let's just find that senile old gift giver. I will gladly use my boot once I find him for wasting our precious time.

## Chapter 1

**Investigate Town Eatery.**

Spyro: What the heck?! Isn't this Santa? Why the hell is he sleeping right here? This goddamn old fart!

Spyro: Oh, he's not asleep, but rather…dead. The hell? Did someone just kill Santa?

Spyro: I guess there's someone who hates Christmas more than I do. Except, I wouldn't go as far as killing Christmas' main figure…

Spyro: There are strangulation marks all over his neck, and these Christmas lights seem to have done the deed.

Spyro: Knowing that Alexa's a huge fan of Santa and Christmas alike, I'm sure she'd be devastated to hear her idol's gone. Just hope that she won't drink more when we send her his body.

Spyro: Starting the investigation, we should look at that sack over there. Anything with items on it will always be suspicious, am I right, rookie?

Spyro: Hey, don't make fun of me! Isn't that your thing when it comes to filled stuff? You always grab and empty it! I'm just mimicking you!

Spyro: Argh, whatever, just check that damn thing and get this done with! I'm already tired of hearing Jingle Bells played around the city!

**Examine Sack.**

Spyro: So inside the sack, we got…cookies?

Spyro: What about cookies, rookie? Do you want to eat it or something? I mean, a bite won't hurt, right?

Mrs. Claus: Don't you dare eat from that, sir! Those cookies are for my husband, Santa. I'll bring you another batch if you want.

Spyro: Your husband was Santa? Ma'am, are you deranged? Santa couldn't possibly have- Wait, never mind, I just remembered that Santa was married.

Spyro: Alright, Mrs. Claus. We got some information for you, but beware…this may be shocking, especially for someone your age.

**Ask Mrs. Claus about her husband, Santa.**

Mrs. Claus: Something that will shock me? Dear, I am immortal, so I can take a little shock.

Spyro: Well, your husband, Santa, was killed recently around here. We just took his body for autopsy.

Mrs. Claus: My goodness, did I hear that right?! My husband was killed?!

Mrs. Claus: No! What will happen to Christmas now? This is impossible! Who would do this barbaric act?!

Spyro: Yeah, I'm sure millions of kids all across the world would feel the same as you. Normally, I couldn't care less about Christmas, but since his death could affect the future, I must investigate it with the detective.

Spyro: Moving on, could you tell us what Santa was like? Or the last time you saw him?

Mrs. Claus: Santa had inspired many children across the world to be humble. As his wife, I must assist him in baking cookies for the kids, the elves, and ourselves.

Mrs. Claus: The last time I saw my darling alive was in the town square. I came from the North Pole to visit him since he seems distressed, and I want to help.

Mrs. Claus: Oh how am I supposed to do to keep Christmas alive now?!

Spyro: Man, it seems like Santa affects people this high. I just don't understand why.

Spyro: Mrs. Claus mentioned that Santa was last seen alive at the town square. We got a new place to investigate now, rookie! Let's head there!

**Investigate Town Square.**

Spyro: Is it just me, or did I just see snow around this area?

Spyro: If my geography lessons didn't fail me, I'm sure that China would have no snow at all. Maybe in the north or the mountainside, but Xi'an isn't on both of those!

Spyro: There must be some reason for this bizarre phenomenon, but we should focus on the case rather than the weather.

Spyro: There's a Christmas stocking up there. Not gonna be that guy, but is it even necessary? It could've belonged to whoever owned this shop!

Spyro: Ah, you saw something unusual on it. It has ice as its surface, and I doubt stockings have that.

Spyro: We could empty that stocking and find anything suspicious inside.

Spyro: By the way, you should check the pile of firewood right there. I think I saw something inside, but I'm not sure, so let's rummage through it.

Spyro: Lastly, there's smashed glass right on the road. Who the hell broke this? It could've injured someone's feet!

Spyro: You can assist by restoring the glass pieces into one since it might've been a clue.

Spyro: My goodness, will this town stop playing Jingle Bells! This is the seventh time I heard it, for f\*ck sake!

**Examine Christmas Stocking.**

Spyro: Damn, this freezes. My fingers could go numb at this point.

Spyro: But at least we got a snowflake…Hold on, a snowflake?!

Spyro: And this isn't fake, but rather a real one, since I feel how cold this is.

Spyro: Be careful, rookie, we gotta dust some of these cells I found on the snowflake. We could extract DNA from it and find out who this belongs to, and later ask them how they get this.

**Examine Snowflake.**

Spyro: According to our database, the DNA belongs to a certain Jack Frost.

Spyro: Jack Frost? As in, the ghost who has the powers of ice? I thought he only exists in fiction!

Spyro: Welp, another Christmas figure for us to talk to. Knowing his position as one, we should ask him whether he knew about Santa's death or not.

**Inquire Jack Frost about Santa's murder.**

Spyro: Alright, Jack Frost, we're with the IPS and we got a lot of questions to ask you.

Jack: IPS? As in, the organization that protects the supernatural entity? Man, I love you guys!

Jack: Can't say I'm a fan of you, Detective Perriades. You're scary and mean. Not fun, dude.

Spyro: For someone who's over 400, you act like an immature brat.

Jack: I desire to be young again, detective, don't mind me. So, what is it that you ask? If you're wondering why there is snow in China…let's say I am responsible for it.

Jack: Can you blame me? Many of the citizens complained about having no snow, so I rewarded them with one. It's fun to have a festivity, right?

Spyro: I didn't plan to ask that, but thanks for the information anyways. We want to know if you are aware of Santa's murder. We found him dead at the town's local eatery tonight.

Jack: What?! Santa's dead?!

Jack: Dude, I can't believe this! He was like a father to me, man! I always enjoy working with him, spreading joy to people around the world!

Jack: I hate this world, detectives. Why do the good guys always go first? Christmas is doomed!

Spyro: Alright, Frost, stay right here and don't go home just yet. We may need your assistance once more during our investigation.

**Examine Stack of Firewood.**

Spyro: See, my instincts are correct, there's something inside!

Spyro: This looks like a birch branch, used to spank those who misbehaved. And I think I know who this belongs to.

Spyro: When I was a kid, I remember that bastard Siegert used to scare me with stories of Krampus, who often spanks misbehaving children on Christmas day, saying Krampus would surely target me.

Spyro: This birching tool certainly belonged to Krampus, rookie. Knowing how much he hates Christmas, he's suspicious when it comes to Santa's demise.

Spyro: As much as I like him for his hatred of Christmas, I doubt he's uninvolved in the crime.

Spyro: Let's confront Krampus, shall we?

**Question Krampus regarding Santa's murder.**

Krampus: Ohoho! Did I see right? Two humans standing in front of me. I hope you have been NAUGHTY! Cause I will have a lot of fun with it!

Spyro: Touch me and I won't hesitate to stake your heart.

Krampus: I would like to see you try, human.

Spyro: Soon when I'm arsed enough, but for now, just tell us if you knew about Santa's murder. We found his body recently.

Krampus: My my, what good news did I hear? That old man's dead?! Finally!

Spyro: You have beef with him or something?

Krampus: They call me Santa Claus' biggest nemesis for a reason, human. I wished for him to perish for a long time, for hindering my work to punish naughty kids.

Krampus: Christmas doesn't deserve to be all merry, humans. The real Christmas involves agony, and that's my kind of domain.

Spyro: While I agree with the former, I can't say I abide with the latter, considering there's one guy trying to achieve that, and we're trying to stop him.

Spyro: Plus, with how you reacted to your nemesis' death, would it make sense for us to declare you as our prime suspect?

Krampus: Don't be ridiculous, human. I may be Claus' number one enemy, but surely I wouldn't kill him. I'm no murderer.

Spyro: You can stick with your assertion, but we will gather enough evidence to see whether we can pierce through your defense or not. Now stay right around here, and don't go anywhere!

**Examine Smashed Glass.**

Spyro: Did that glass slit your skin open? Cause I saw blood pouring around.

Spyro: I don't get it, for someone who hurt themselves, you remained calm and composed. Are you a robot, rookie? Or you're just emotionless in general?

Spyro: But thankfully, that blood didn't stain the bulb at all. Wait a minute…a bulb?

Spyro: You're right, rookie. This bulb looks like the one missing from Santa's neck. This might belong to the Christmas lights that killed Santa!

Spyro: Alright, let's pick up those flakes on the bulb, since it may reveal something ingenious, or something vital.

**Examine Bulb.**

Spyro: Good, it's time to send these flakes to Enno. Believe it or not, Enno used to prank Santa a year ago by burning his chimney when he's coming to his house. Honestly, I find him remarkable for this only.

Spyro: He's not that much of a Christmas fan, so I doubt he'll be affected that much by Santa dying. Cause if he does, who knows if he's able to help?

**Analyze Flakes.**

Enno (*Sobs*): Hey, guys…

Spyro: I take my words back, rookie. Enno, I didn't know you were such a Christmas addict that you cried over Santa dying.

Enno: No, Spyro, it's not the reason why I cried.

Enno: I am sobbing because I forgot to buy new equipment for the lab in the supermarket when there are massive discounts! Now it's expired and I'm doomed since I'm broke!

Spyro: I- Okay…

Spyro: Aside from your terrible luck, you got anything for us? Or you can't since your equipment sucked and you need a new one?

Enno: Nah, do not worry about that. I managed to analyze the flakes you gave me, and it's tobacco.

Enno: Normally, I'd say the killer smokes this time, but this is not coming from an ordinary cigarette, but rather, a pipe.

Enno: I asked Alexa about the victim, and apparently, Santa's lungs are in perfect condition, which means…

Spyro: Our killer smokes a pipe, that's what it means! They can pipe down on their spree of malicious intent before we smoke them up!

**Autopsy Victim's Body.**

Alexa: Leeife iz zust oonfaerr…zetektives…tEh uneeverze iz just cruU..eL…

Spyro: Oh for f\*ck sake, Alexa. Are you drunk again?

Alexa: MaybEe…ZantA's deed…aNd Kristmaz's dOomeD…My zhildhoOd's goNe!

Spyro: Okay Alexa, you're not up at work today. I might just call the geezer to give you the appropriate punishment.

Alexa: nOOO! nOT puniZmeNt!

***10 minutes later…***

Spyro: Well the drunkard's dealt with. Now, what should we do?

Spyro: Right, why don't we just contact Beifong? I mean, she's the embodiment of an all-knowing all, so might as well have her do the autopsy.

Spyro: Now let me just borrow Alexa's phone and call her, since she saved it for no reason.

Spyro: Give me time to make the call, and then we wait till she came here.

***10 minutes later…***

Lei: Thanks for calling me, detectives. Forgive me for arriving late, since I'm visiting my relatives in a restaurant. It's good to be back in my homeland China.

Lei: Regarding Santa…First, I feel sorry for him, and may he rest in eternal peace, and second, I'll do my best on examining his cadaver.

Lei: My skills are rusty, but you don't need that much expertise to deduce that Santa was strangled to death.

Lei: And based on the marks on his neck that constricted his larynx, I assume he struggled a lot to stay alive, at least around ten minutes before collapsing and dying. Had we visited the eatery earlier, he would still be alive.

Lei: To strangle a big man like that requires brute strength, but that's not all.

Lei: I found traces of fatty juices that are rich in omega-3, and protein. And based on that information, this may come from frog legs.

Spyro: People eat frogs? That's disgusting!

Lei: It's not that horrible, I savored it myself and I loved it.

Lei: Either way, Santa didn't eat any frog legs recently since his stomach is clean, meaning your killer savors the exotic treat.

Spyro: Holy crap, Beifong. You're an all-knowing all. Tell me, did you sell your soul to the Devil for extensive knowledge?

Lei: All I need is learning, Mr. Perriades. It's not that impossible to do, since you could do it yourself to retrain your manners.

Spyro: Damn you! Whatever, we got a frog-eating killer to catch anyway. Just hope that they leap from their hiding spot as soon as possible!

Spyro: My goodness, all of this Christmas talk pisses me off! It's like everything is about that dreadful holiday, this case included!

Spyro: We got Santa killed, which is a bizarre thing to happen. Our suspects are all figures of the holiday itself.

Spyro: Both Mrs. Claus and Jack Frost were distraught at the fact Santa was gone.

Spyro: Krampus was the polar opposite since he hated Santa and was happy at the fact he had died.

Spyro: Now which begs the question: Who killed Santa Claus?

Mrs. Claus: Finally, I found you two! Please, I need your help!

Spyro: Mrs. Claus? What happened?

Mrs. Claus: You know Rudolph, the red-nosed reindeer Santa often uses to carry his sleigh?

Spyro: Yeah, what about it?

Mrs. Claus: Well, he's missing! And I can't find him anywhere!

## Chapter 2

Spyro: Okay, a reindeer's gone missing, so what? It's not like it's that important compared to your husband's murder.

Mrs. Claus: Not important?! Young man, Rudolph is essential for Christmas alone! Without him, we couldn't convey presents to children all over the world!

Mrs. Claus: I'm begging you, help find him, please!

Spyro: Alright, goddamnit! We'll help find that darned reindeer as you wish! Just tell us any leads to scouring for him!

Mrs. Claus: You can try finding him by walking to the south. If you keep going for fifteen minutes straight, you'll find a cave there. Rudolph may be in there.

Spyro: Alright, we're in this cave now. Some locals told us that this cave belongs to a very cursed figure that resembles an animal. Pfft, how funny.

Spyro: They call this the Yule Cat cave or some sort. What a pathetic name, honestly, but whatever, let's take a look around and find that reindeer.

**Investigate Yule Cat's Cave.**

Spyro: There he is! Come here you damn rascal!

Spyro: Damn, this animal's all sad and stuff. To be fair, his owner was dead, but I didn't expect animals to react like humans.

Spyro: Wait, did you see what this deer is eating? It looks like torn paper. Quick, rookie, take that out!

Spyro: You know, I think Santa's killer might be here too since besides this paper we could restore, I also saw other clues scattered around.

Spyro: For example, there's that notice stuck up in the cliff walls. It's faded as usual, but you could restore it yourself with the kit.

Spyro: Okay, there's not much we could pick up again. I guess I assumed wrong when we got a lot of clues, but still, two is enough to build our case.

Spyro: Aside from work talks, I am so glad that the dreadful music Jingle Bells didn't reach here. Finally, after hearing that for the 11th time!

**Examine Faded Notice.**

Spyro: Alright, we restored it, but what's the point when we don't understand a single word?

Spyro: Just what the hell is this language? And I thought that killer fisherman's accent was worse!

Spyro: I guess Jennifer could figure it out. She still hates me for what I said before about her pleasure toy, but who cares about personal feelings when there's work in our way?

**Analyze Notice.**

Jennifer: It's good to see you again, detective. Santa dying was a surprise to me, but I'm not going to dwell much further on that when there are other difficulties to face.

Jennifer: And you, Spyro, I still loathe you for your words, but since we're at work, let's truce…for now. Do you agree with those terms?

Spyro: Whatever suits you. Now just tell us the results of the notice! What language was that?

Jennifer: It's the official language of Iceland, which is Icelandic.

Jennifer: So, your text, "Varist þann sem neytir barna og takið fötin ykkar áður en hann kemur!", roughly translates to "Beware of the child-eater, and take your new clothes before he comes!".

Spyro: Even when translated, I still have no idea what that means.

Jennifer: It's not the text that determines who you should find next, but rather how you interpret it.

Jennifer: The text mentioned a figure that eats children for not receiving new clothes right? According to the Christmas traditions in Iceland, that refers to the Yule Cat.

Spyro: You're saying a cat's the actual reason children get terrorized on Christmas in Iceland?

Jennifer: Well, not an ordinary cat, I assure you. This cat is much much bigger and has the form of a ghost. Not to mention they can talk too.

Jennifer: It's best if you return to the cave where it was named after the cat itself. I'm sure the Yule Cat is staying right there. But be careful, they're very hostile and would attack if they could.

**Meet the Yule Cat to question his presence in China.**

Yule Cat: HISS! How dare you set foot on MY territory, humans! Leave or else you'll be my next dinner! You may taste like frog legs…but it's up to me to find out.

Spyro: Oh no, you ain't doing that, cat-boy. We're with the IPS, and we know many ways to stop a fiend like you, so you better comply with us by answering a few questions!

Yule Cat: Meow! IPS?!

Yule Cat: That changes everything…Alright, ask away your questions then, my time is running low before I go back to hunt and eat more children.

Spyro: So, since you're a Christmas figure yourself, have you heard about Santa's passing? We found him murdered.

Yule Cat: Santa was murdered?!

Yule Cat: I can't say I am bewildered about that, detectives. Santa had many enemies around, despite being all stuck up with his annoying positivity. I dislike him too, but that doesn't mean I would strangle him to death.

Yule Cat: All these murder talks are giving me the thrills to take care of more children who didn't receive new clothes before this holiday. This is just as addicting as smoking pipe, and I'm just a ghost.

Yule Cat: Meow, excuse me, I have a job to do. I know I shouldn't mess with you IPS, but if you follow me, I won't hesitate to turn you into my next meal.

**Examine Torn Paper.**

Spyro: Now that we restored it into one piece, we should read the contents…if there are any.

Spyro: Thank goodness it's not faded! Let's see…

Spyro: "Blood is red, what comes next is wrath, Santa you are dead, and I'll be the one to prepare your death!". Holy crap, what a heated poem!

Spyro: Let's send this to Jennifer so she could give us her insight about this poem!

**Analyze Poem.**

Jennifer: "Kim! Don't go, 'cause you're not desperate enough for my beautiful baby!"

Spyro: What the hell are you even blurting about, Jennifer? Who is this Kim you're referring to? Your new date?

Jennifer: It's a line from a movie. Of course, you didn't know, since the only thing you care about is being an ass.

Spyro: Not in the mood to argue, Jennifer. Stop with the movie blabbering and tell us about the poem.

Jennifer: It's the same as with the movie I'm blabbering about. That poem was made by one of the characters in the movie, "Desperate B\*tches"!

Jennifer: The movie is a banger, believe me. The plot may not make any sense, but surely the movie will give you endless laughter!

Jennifer: Reminds me of the scene where two world leaders debate about who has the biggest schlong amongst them all in front of the public. That scene was such a comedy genius.

Spyro: Even with you describing it, hearing about this movie alone already gave me brain damage.

Jennifer: Well, sorry if you have such terrible taste, Spyro. Aside from me fangirling on this movie, I can tell that your killer loves it too, since I found tobacco on the tickets.

Spyro: And I wonder which Christmas figure would destroy their sanity by watching that movie…but let's add it to our profile, rookie.

Spyro: Holy crap, rookie, this case bugs me off! Every single time I see and hear Christmas!

Spyro: Oh, Christmas this! Oh, Christmas! To hell with this holiday! I wish I could just wreck this abomination of a day!

Spyro: What's good with this awful holiday anyways?!

Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come: ...No, you're wrong, good sir…

Spyro: Wha- Who are you?! State your business and spirit!

Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come: ...I am the spirit of Christmas representing the future…And good sir, I will show you how valuable Christmas is…

Spyro: Great, another bloody Christmas figure. Whatever, you can spout all that nonsense about how "good" Christmas is, but that won't change my opinion!

**Talk to the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come.**

Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come: ...You are incorrect, good sir, and you better contemplate your words…

Spyro: Oh yeah, what are you gonna do? Haunt me until I-

Spyro: Wha- What the hell is happening to me?!

Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come: ...I have shown you the vision of Christmas in the future, good sir…On the day where your death has struck…

Spyro: I- Ugh-

Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come: ...Did you see yet, good sir? Children dance on your grave…Your reputation has decreased into nothing but a pest…No one, not even your family, attended your future funeral…because of your attitude…

Spyro: No…this can't be…

Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come: ...Spending your days as a miser, you slowly descend into the pits of hatred, where everyone insists that you have to perish…Including your colleagues…

Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come: ...In the future, you terrorize a lot of people for simply celebrating Christmas…You have become known as a menace…

Spyro: F\*ck…

Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come: ...It's best if you start to rotate your views in the right direction…The future may change…It's your-

Spyro: ARGH! ENOUGH!

Spyro: All this manipulation…You aren't stopping me anymore…Agh! J-just tell us if you know about Santa dying today! You're a Christmas figure, aren't you?

Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come: ...I'd say it again, change your path, good sir. It is not my obligation to answer your questions…You have one choice…

Spyro: Hey- Damnit, the spirit disappeared!

Spyro: But is it right? In the future, will my grave be stepped on by people? That no one needs my existence anymore? I usually don't care, but that's not the legacy I want to keep.

Spyro: I dunno, rookie, I need a little break…but once I'm done, we could continue our investigation again, starting with the same eatery where Santa was killed…

**Investigate Tables.**

Spyro: Alright, I feel better now. Jeez, I still feel that I might be too harsh on Christmas, but I don't know.

Spyro: So what did you find, rookie? A gift box? Are you sure it doesn't belong to a random kid who happened to have lost their gift?

Spyro: Ah, there's a tag that addresses Santa's name. Why would Santa receive gifts though? Wasn't he supposed to give them instead…unless it's one of the Christmas figures who sent him one.

Spyro: While you check on that, try to pick that vacuum cleaner over there. This looks out of place, and not to mention the thing inside the vacuum itself…there's something torn inside!

Spyro: You can just do all these tasks alone, while I need to take a smoke. I don't know why, but my head hurts.

**Examine Gift Box.**

Spyro: You found a faded paper inside? Not surprised, since every piece of paper will always end up faded during our investigations.

Spyro: Use the brush once again to restore what the paper said. I salute your patience since all of these faded papers irritate me.

**Examine Faded Paper.**

Spyro: So the letter itself indicates that someone is angry at our gift delivery man. Look at this, "Dear, you better stop the charade, or else I'll make you stop your actions!".

Spyro: "Dear", huh? That sounds like what Mrs. Claus would use, considering her relationship with Santa.

Spyro: What does she mean by stopping her husband from his actions? Did she had enough giving presents to children across the world?

Spyro: Let's ask her about this, rookie!

**Question Mrs. Claus about her demanding letter to her husband.**

Mrs. Claus: Thanks for finding Rudolph, dear. I was so worried that I had to eat something exotic such as frog legs to calm myself.

Spyro: Well, we also found something else besides the reindeer: Your note to your husband. Could you elaborate further on what you meant by "stopping" your husband?

Mrs. Claus: Oh dear, you found that…

Mrs. Claus: What can I say? Santa went too far on his duties!

Mrs. Claus: See, it usually takes a long time to create gifts for 7 billion people. Even getting a month late could screw us up. But you know what my husband did? He overworked the elves until they got injured!

Mrs. Claus: He insisted that they all work fast or he'll kick them out of the North Pole. The elves couldn't live outside the North Pole, dears, or else they'll be toast!

Mrs. Claus: What's worse is that the elves themselves are only children, and it's not fair to overwork them!

Mrs. Claus: I tried to convince Santa to go easy on them, but he insisted that work was essential for the happiness of children. Ironic for him to say that when he's pressuring them in the first place!

Mrs. Claus: Oh, how I dread the tragic stuff that happened on this sacred day.

Spyro: Mrs. Claus, I hope you didn't take extreme measures to take care of your husband for his methods on the elves!

**Examine Vacuum Cleaner.**

Spyro: With the torn picture taken, would you care to restore it into one piece, rookie? My head still hurts.

Spyro: You would? Good, now let me take a rest for a bit. F\*ck, that spirit got me good.

**Examine Torn Photo.**

Spyro: You finished already? Dude, only a minute has passed!

Spyro: Since you're fast at a lot of stuff, do tell me what was on the torn picture you're holding.

Spyro: What? Please tell me you said it right, did I just hear you say that Krampus, out of all the figures, shaking hands with Santa?!

Spyro: That sounds like a new revelation to us. Let's find out why Krampus hid this fact then!

**Ask Krampus about his picture of him and Santa shaking hands.**

Spyro: Let's cut to the chase, Krampus. We know how much you despise Santa, but do tell us why you are shaking hands with him in this picture.

Krampus: Scheiße! You found that!

Krampus: Whatever. Seems like good ol' Krampus is not good at lying. Might as well tell the truth to you humans.

Krampus: I'll be honest with you, besides getting sick from eating frog legs all day, I'm also sick of being evil.

Krampus: I love giving nasty punishments to those who misbehave. It's like getting addicted to the smoking pipe, but all I get is hatred from both the humans AND the supernatural world.

Krampus: Not even the Yule Cat would hang out with me, and we're both the embodiment of evil! A shame since he also likes "Desperate B\*tches" like me too, we could be movie geeks together, you know.

Krampus: Hence why I sought a truce with Santa, maybe we can have our peace together. Everything is tiring, humans.

Spyro: And you think we're supposed to believe what you said, Krampus? We don't trust you a single bit, and if you lied and killed Santa, the wrath of children will be the last nightmare you can have!

Spyro: Damnit, honestly I don't even want to recap anything. My head hurts so bad, and I am still contemplating whether I should tolerate Christmas or not.

Spyro: All I know is that we got a few suspects who started to reveal their true feelings to Santa, including his wife who believed he was too harsh on the elves.

Spyro: Not to mention Krampus who said he was having a truce with Santa. Sounds like BS to me.

Spyro: Alright, you got any more leads on what should we do next before I go insane from the dizziness?

Tashard: I do have a lead for you two to do, detective.

Tashard: Remember the Yule Cat? Well, he went on a rampage on the town square, and he is hunting children! The last thing we want is kids getting eaten.

## Chapter 3

Spyro: That feline's eating kids? I know children are annoying, but eating them is out of the question.

Spyro: Come on, rookie, let's stop this thing from his stint!

Yule Cat: IPS! I told you not to interfere with MY work! Let me hunt these poor devils for their mistakes!

Spyro: Oh no, you won't.

Yule Cat: Hah! Do you think that gun will just be me? Try, humans, bullets don't graze me!

Spyro: We'll see about that, asshole! *BANG!*

Yule Cat: Pathetic, that didn't hurt-

Yule Cat: Meow! What is this feeling?! Why am I getting-

Yule Cat: …Sleepy…

Spyro: Phew, the tranquilizer worked. Let's take this thing to custody before he harms more children.

Children: Our heroes! Thank you for taking down that evil cat!

Spyro: You kids talking to us?

Children: Yes! Hail our newest heroes!

Children: Hail! Hail!

Spyro: Rookie, this is the first time I got praised by somebody…This never happened before!

Spyro: Alright, kids, we need you to leave the premises, because we're going to clean the mess this ghostly feline made!

Spyro: Rookie, now that they're gone, let's investigate this town square again to find more clues that we might have left out!

**Investigate Shop Front.**

Spyro: Surprisingly, this place isn't destroyed at all. Guess the cat's considerate of not damaging anything.

Spyro: Except trash is still scattered everywhere, but most of them look like clues.

Spyro: This smashed figure is an example. The looks of it scream Christmas to me, so let's restore that.

Spyro: Next is this grandfather's clock, which looks out of place. Might as well open it. Be careful though, since there's a passcode you need to crack.

Spyro: What do you say about the exact omnibus we rode with Santa hours ago? I sense a little bit of…a strange aura. Could you at least pick up that strange sample stuck on the door?

**Examine Smashed Figurine.**

Spyro: This looks like a nutcracker, rookie. I know the function is to smash nuts in, but the name sounds ridiculous.

Spyro: Though, you seem to focus on the strange substance on the surface. You can pick it up to find out what it is.

**Examine Nutcracker.**

Spyro: Good, now let me see what this is…

Spyro: I touched it, and it looks like melted ice. Someone placed ice blocks on this nutcracker, it seems.

Spyro: Though, Jack Frost seems like an ideal choice for us to check on. I mean, the dude's the bringer of winter, so he's capable of crafting ice!

Spyro: And I can't believe that I missed this, but there's a small tag under the nutcracker. It says that this was a gift from Santa Claus.

Spyro: Why would Santa's gift to Jack end up smashed? We gotta speak to Frost himself about this!

**Catechize Jack Frost about the broken nutcracker gifted by Santa.**

Jack: Hey again, detectives. Do you love exotic food? I got frog legs for you to try.

Spyro: No thanks, Frost. We have something for you to elaborate on, like this gift that ends up broken. This belonged to Santa, who gave it to you.

Jack: Curse that old man, bro! He broke it!

Jack: Detectives, I always disliked being treated as a child! Santa constantly treats me as one! It bugs me off!

Jack: First he forbade me from smoking pipes because I was too young. Dude, I am over 400 years old, how is that called young?!

Jack: Second, he would ban me from watching "Desperate B\*tches" for the second time because the movie was inappropriate!

Jack: I was so irate, that I told him to get lost. He got hurt by my words, so he smashed the same gift in front of my eyes, and left.

Spyro: Frost, if you strangled him in retaliation for treating you like a kid, you can experience being grown inside the supernatural prison instead!

**Examine Grandfather's Clock.**

Spyro: What the f\*ck! There's a skull inside!

Spyro: Judging by its size, it looks like a child's skull! Who would put this into a clock?!

Spyro: We gotta examine this closer to find out who did this, rookie, starting with the strands over the scalp.

**Examine Skull.**

Spyro: The strands are fur. To be more exact, a fur with a ghastly aura on it.

Spyro: We do have a ghastly creature with fur in our sight: The Yule Cat himself!

Spyro: I am aware that he eats kids, but why bother placing a child's skull on a clock? Was it to spook someone? Let's ask him in custody!

**Confront the Yule Cat about the skull.**

Spyro: Wake up, you child-eating feline! We got questions to ask!

Yule Cat: Hiss! Where am I?!

Spyro: *stares angrily at the Yule Cat*

Yule Cat: Jeez, alright! Just ask the damn question, IPS!

Spyro: Any ideas about the skull you placed on a clock? Whose skull was that?

Yule Cat: Ah, that. It was the skull of an elf, IPS. It was a message for that old man, Santa.

Spyro: What message, exactly?

Yule Cat: Santa would often halt my attempts on eating children who didn't receive new clothes on Christmas! He even told the villagers in Iceland about all of my weaknesses!

Yule Cat: Thanks to that, I got hunted. I was so scared of the humans' wrath that I moved to China when I heard there is a vacant spot for me to stay!

Yule Cat: I knew Santa will come to China soon, so I acted fast on killing one of his elves, and then tried to send a message to him as revenge, but the clock never arrived at his sleigh!

Spyro: And if you took your revenge a step further by killing Santa, your next food will be nothing but rotten junk in the place you deserve to be: locked in a cage!

**Examine Omnibus.**

Spyro: Alright, since this looks like a supernatural fragment, let's send this to Viktor for his insight.

**Analyze Fragments.**

Viktor: This is a fascinating element you have sent me, detectives. Oh, how avant-garde.

Spyro: What's with this fragment that you got so hyped on, Viktor?

Viktor: These fragments belong to the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come! Its aura is robust and shimmers through this. I assume it possessed the omnibus for vague reasons.

Spyro: That spirit again? Oh f\*ck no, it would possess me again!

Viktor: Even with that, isn't the spirit a suspect in your murder investigation? Might as well summon it for good measure.

Spyro: ...Fine, just hoping that my head won't hurt anymore from that…

**Summon the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come once again.**

Viktor: Here it comes. Watch and listen, detective!

Viktor: O' Spirit of Christmas of the Future! I shall summon thou in the name of the divination of Christmas! Come from the omnibus!

Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come: ...I have arrived, what is it that you seek…

Viktor: Spyro and the detective here wish to speak with you, O' Spirit of Christmas. I will mark my leave to make room for you three. Goodbye.

Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come: ...You again, good sir? Have you decided to change? Let me put my pipe down before we continue further…

Spyro: I don't know, spirit. But what I need to know is, why are you on the omnibus?

Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come: ...I suspect the worst from Father Christmas himself…His aura had despair on it…He was off his merry personality…

Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come: ...I tried to give my vision to him, but it was impossible…Much like handling the misers who watch "Desperate B\*tches"...They are immune to my visions, and I have to see their horrific movie playing on air…

Spyro: So you killed Santa since you gave up?

Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come: ...I do not condone murder, good sir. But, we will focus on the main part today: Your change…

Spyro: Oh no no- Argh!

Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come: ...Good sir, this time I will show you the true vision of Christmas. As for you, detective, you can leave since I sense the good spirit in you…

***30 minutes later…***

Tashard: Detective, where is Spyro? Why is he missing? Did he skip work?

Tashard: What? He's getting possessed by the spirit of Christmas? Why?

Tashard: Because he hated Christmas? Well, that might've been too-

Spyro: Far? Nope, I feel energized now, geezer!

Tashard: Son? What the heck are you dressed as? Why did you wear that costume?

Spyro: It's proof of how amazing Christmas is, geezer! I am so goddamn pumped on this holiday, it makes my day absolutely better!

Tashard: I'm sure the spirit took you in, son. Don't force yourself on this charade.

Spyro: What? Of course not! Christmas is great, damnit! Just shut your mouth and let me work on this!

Tashard: ...Alright, I won't stop you, son. Detective, please watch out for him, I don't want him to turn insane. Go back and investigate the cave, since you'll be bound to find more leads there!

**Investigate Cave Edges.**

Spyro: Screw the damn killer for ruining this goddamn sacred day, rookie! Santa will always live in my heart!

Spyro: What have you got? A Chinese lantern? Okay, go examine that then, like that substance on its edges.

Spyro: There's a broken pair of spectacles on the ground. Looks the same as what Santa wore before he died. Restore that, and then analyze it further.

Spyro: I want to yell Jingle Bells so bad, rookie! It's what keeps me alive!

**Examine Chinese Lantern.**

Spyro: Good, now send that to Wackydanger! F\*ck him for hating Christmas…the nerve!

**Analyze Transparent Substance.**

Enno: Spyro, are you sure you are okay? You sound more cray-cray than me this time.

Spyro: You think I'm crazy, Wackydanger? Nobody beats how crazy you are! Now give us the results for the substance!

Enno: Damn, dude. Alright, the substance is tears.

Enno: I extracted the DNA through the tears, and I can confirm that your killer has yellow eyes!

Spyro: Our killer has yellow eyes? We can make it orange which represents their jumpsuit!

**Examine Broken Spectacles.**

Spyro: Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle all the way! Oh, don't mind me, rookie, just chanting the spirit of Christmas!

Spyro: Now the spectacles are fixed, you can send them to the madhouse once again!

**Analyze Santa's Spectacles.**

Enno: Spyro, please, take a hold of yourself. The spirit is manipulating you!

Spyro: Shut up, psychopath! Don't tell me what to do! Just give us the results so I can vent my anger to the bastard of a killer!

Enno: I pray for your sanity, Spyro. Your spectacles have numerous substances, but in particular, tobacco, and the DNA of your killer!

Enno: I examined the latter furthermore and I can confirm that your killer age is much older than 850 years old!

Spyro: No matter how old they are, spending time incarcerated is the only place they can grow up now!

Spyro: Alright, goddamnit! Show us the scoundrel who dares to stain this holiday with blood!

Spyro: I won't hesitate to beat the crap out of them if I can! Let's do this, rookie!

**Take care of the killer now!**

Spyro: Krampus! How could you kill Santa? You ruined my Christmas!

Krampus: Ha-ha-ha. Poor little man. Genius idea, wasn't it?

Krampus: I finally got rid of that old bag of crap.

Spyro: Why now?

Krampus: Did you really think Mohandas can't pull the strings behind your back?

Krampus: With Claus gone, the world is already much darker. How beautiful.

Spyro: You disgusting abomination! I will kill you! KALOUPI! *shoots Krampus*

Krampus: What's that? A water gun? You miserable humans. Always think you have a chance... We'll see each other again.

Spyro: BASTARD! I will rip that creature into shreds if I see him again!

Spyro: No one dares to ruin my day, or else they'll pay!

Tashard: Okay, Spyro. I think your mental state has gotten worse, I'll be locking you up for a short time.

Spyro: I'm a perfectly sane, old man! Don't you dare send me to-

Tashard: Alright, he's taken care of. Now, detective, you have to keep your eyes on Krampus. We have to catch him before he brings more terror! Godspeed!