Neko Lovetsume

**Neko Lovetsume** is the second episode of Season 2, and the twenty-second episode overall.

## Main Cast

* Queen Steph as Steph
* Melanie Martinez as Isabela
* Lentimassu as Lenti
* Victoria Smurfit as Claire
* Mandy Fitzpatrick as Criminal
* Idekmandy as Mandy
* Jessica Alba as Jessica
* Dodo as Dodo
* Oliver as Oliver
* Binkx as Binkx
* Natsu as Natsu
* Penny as Penny
* Sally as Sally
* Nimbus as Nimbus

## Episode

**STEPH:** ok what the fuck is thiS BELA

**BELA:** *(using an iPad)* what

**STEPH:** why the fuck does this say you spent *50 DOLLARS* on an iPAD GAME???

**BELA:** we're rich

**STEPH:** it stil doesn't explain anything

**BELA:** so there's this game called neko atsume and it's so fun and-

> *Steph slaps the table next to her.*
>
>

**HOTEL RECEPTIONIST:** Ma'm, you can't do that!

**STEPH:** watch me

**STEPH:** Bela, I want you to socialize with someone new. Outside the internet!

**BELA:** aaaah ok

**LENTI:** Thank you for bringing us in this vacation.

**CLAIRE:** baah we're family

**JESSICA:** and I can see some people who I'd like to make families with~

**CLAIRE:** Couldn't agree more.

**LENTI:** Ugh, just go on your single women cruise while I enjoy not having to do anything for once. I'm having a spa day!

**STEPH:** And *I'm coming with*!

**DODO:** bitches

**JESSICA:** WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS CAT

**JESSICA:** TELL ME WHAT CAT TALKS LIKE THIS

**PENELOPE:** #stopdodo

**OLIVER:** #stopdodo

**BINKX:** #stopdodo

**NATSU:** #stopdodo

**NIMBUS:** #stopdodo

**PENNY:** #stopdodo

**SALLY:** #stopdodo

**DODO:** fuck you

**STEPH:** why did we bring dodo to this trip

**DODO:** meow bitch

**STEPH:** let's go to the Spa

**LENTI:** oh yeah I forgot I was just enjoying the drama

> *Jessica and Claire leave to the beach, while Lenti and Steph go to the Spa.*
>
>

**ANNIE:** Is that Neko Atsume?

**BELA:** what

**ANNIE:** what you're playing, is that Neko Atsume?

**BELA:** yes

**ANNIE:** I lo-OMFG I JUST GOT JOE O:

**BELA:** o:

**ANNIE:** o:

**BELA:** I got him like 2 hours ago lmao

**ANNIE:** bye

**BELA:** no wait I'm Isabela

**ANNIE:** I'm Annie check my tumblr

> *Bela smiles. Annie smiles back.*
>
>

> *On the beach... Claire pulls out a flask.*
>
>

**JESSICA:** how the fuck we are in bikinis where did-

**CLAIRE:** women have secrets

**JESSICA:** i'm a woman

**CLAIRE:** aaaaa

**CLAIRE:** time to go home

**JESSICA:** what why when why

**CLAIRE:** things are getting awkward and i left all my wine in bela's bag

**JESSICA:** ok i guess???

> *Jessica and Claire run over to the Hotel.*
>
>

**JESSICA:** this was really fast

**CLAIRE:** magic of editing

**JESSICA:** respect the fourth wall

**CLAIRE:** redirect the firewall?

**JESSICA:** respect the fourth wall

**CLAIRE:** recognize the sky?

**JESSICA:** ok this is bullshit you were understanding me like 2 seconds ago

**CLAIRE:** bela's soom is 301 let's go

**JESSICA:** only because you'll get me drunk

> *Claire and Jessica reach room 301, and they open the door without knocking for comedic purposes, and they have the key because... yes.*
>
>

**CLAIRE:** aalesbianism!!

**JESSICA:** bela who is that girl you're lesbianing with

**ANNIE:** i thought interrupting a makeout session was prohibited

**BELA:** go away you old bitch

**CLAIRE:** just give me my wine

**BELA:** what the shit

> *Claire grabs a bag.*
>
>

**CLAIRE:** 'k thanks go back to being lesbians

> *Claire and Jessica leave.*
>
>

**BELA:** I just realized two hours have passed
**ANNIE:** new cats o:

> *Bela and Annie open Neko Atsume.*
>
>

**BELA:** i have tubbs o:
**ANNIE:** so do i o:

> *Steph and Lenti leave the Spa, and annouce to everyone they're having dinner soon.*
>
>

> *The dinner starts, and everyone is at the table.*
>
>

**BELA:** guys this is my girlfriend her name is annie

**ANNIE:** hi i'm annie

**BELA:** yeah I know I just said that

**ANNIE: aaaaa** ok

**MANDY:** cute

**CLAIRE:** this is your first line in the episode lol

**DODO:** stop breaking the fourth wall you old bitch slut whore

**JESSICA:** go away you fuck

**DODO:** speak english

**DODO:** rawr

**BELA:** rawr same

**TINA:** fun

**ANNIE:** bela bae who's that

**BELA:** i have 0 clue

**STEPH:** oh the poor squirrely little runt she's got no clue she's out of her fucking tree

**BELA:** i'm

**ANNIE:** look @ the cat o:

**OLIVER:** hi

**ANNIE:** hi who are you

**OLIVER:** a cat

**ANNIE:** magical o:

**BELA:** who's that

**OLIVER:** wtf

**ANNIE:** don't curse

**BELA:** cursing is gross !!

**ANNIE:** exactly !!

**PENELOPE:** ew lesbianism

**ANNIE:** :o

**BELA:** :o

**CLAIRE:** :o

**DODO:** stop this gay ass shit shit hoe cunt

**JESSICA:** SOMEBODY needs a time-out

**BELA:** it isn't me right

**JESSICA:** DODO NEEDS A TIME-OUT

**BELA:** o:

**BELA:** fun!!

**ANNIE:** we're going to play neko atsume and watch scream queens

**BELA:** yes ok

**STEPH:** what the shit my dinner pause up onjh

**ANNIE:** room service

**STEPH:** just go

> *Annie and Bela go to their room to play Neko Atsume and watch Scream Queens.*
>
>

**STEPH:** peace

> *After Steph says peace, for comedic purposes, Dodo's time-out ends.*
>
>

**DODO:** meow bitch
**JESSICA:** i'm going to my bedroom and i'm hugging myself because this cat

> *Jessica leaves.*
>
>

> *In Jessica's bedroom...*
>
>

**DODO:** meow bitch

**JESSICA:** AI DIOS MIO EL DIABLO

**DODO:** yes it is me

**JESSICA:** go away you fuck

**DODO:** aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

**JESSICA:** meow bitch

**DODO:** no

> *Dodo slaps Jessica. (?)*
>
>

**JESSICA:** \*gasp\* NO!

> *Jessica slaps Dodo.*
>
>

> *Dodo slaps Jessica.*
>
>

> *Jessica slaps Dodo.*
>
>

> *Dodo slaps Jessica.*
>
>

> *Jessica slaps Dodo.*
>
>

> *Dodo slaps Jessica.*
>
>

**DODO:** this is boring me bye

> *Downstairs, Bela comes marching and angry.*
>
>

**BELA:** I WANT TO MURDER ANNIE

**MANDY:** Pay up, Claire.

**CLAIRE:** Just 2 more hours, Bela! C'mon!

**STEPH:** why

**BELA:** WE WERE WATCHING SCREAM QUEENS AND CHILL, AND SHE SAID "WOW I HATE HESTER"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**MANDY:** o:

**ANNIE:** bela bae come back

**BELA:** i can't you hate hester !!

**ANNIE:** aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

**BELA:** i'm crying at you i thought we were soulmates

**STEPH:** stop

**ANNIE:** but we agree with eveyrthign else

**CLAIRE:** learn english

**ANNIE:** i know english

**CLAIRE:** sorry i thought you were jessica for a second

**BELA:** how

**MANDY:** she's drunk

**BELA:** i know

**ANNIE:** bela bae

**BELA:** aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

**STEPH:** take this elsewhere i'm trying to regain control of the episode

**DODO:** stop breaking the fourth wall you ugly slut

**ANNIE:** bela bae please we can never talk about this again

**BELA:** ok

**ANNIE:** ok

**STEPH:** yeah now go upstairs and go back to lesbianising so we can eat

**LENTI:** I've been hungry since scene 1.

**DODO:** i fucking hate fourth wall breakes

**STEPH:** fuck you i don't care look the turkey is here

**MANDY:** tur-tur-key-key

**STEPH:** I'm

**CRIMINAL:** food!

**CLAIRE:** this is like your first line this episode

**CRIMINAL:** Ikr

> *Dodo attacks Claire.*
>
>

**JESSICA:** (shouting from her room) *EL DIABLO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*

**CLAIRE:** TAKE THIS HELLSPAWN OFF OF ME!!!

**STEPH:** AAAAAAA GET OFF OF MY MOM!!!!

**MANDY:** this turkey tastes really good

**CRIMINAL:** DODO GET OFF OF THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**DODO:** STOP THE FUCKING WALL BREAKING

**STEPH:** AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH OK

**CLAIRE:** OK OK OK

**CRIMINAL:** \*sigh\* thank god thats over

**DODO:** watch your back claire