Headhunters 4: The Tenacious Ten

## Introduction

After a narrow escape in week 6 and the biggest bid of all-time on a QB, Guilloteam couldn't escape the 140's and was sent Green Bay Packing.

## In Memorium: The Guilloteam

They say anger hurts yourself more than it hurts others. You live with it, let it fester, and it eats away at you from the inside. This week, it was anger that slayed the beast. No one is going to argue that Mark Andrews and his 0.85 didn't hurt. Or that Amon-Ra the Fantasy Sun Gawd being taken out of the game for what was later determined to be "not a concussion" wasn't a huge let down. Or even that Taylor Heinicken didn't even look good through beer goggles in his win against the Packers.

But if we're going to make heads or tails over this head-rolling tailspin, there is only one place to look: the bench. Moore on that in a second.

The only reason this was even a contest was because of Muller Lite being pretzeled into benching Danny Dimes for I guess Dak Prescott? And then CP once again had to Indiana Jones his way under the door with Patty Providence Friarsmuth on SNF. That exciting mini-head-to-head came to a close with a garbage time grab from Muth that put CP ahead of Muller by less than one point, sending Lite to the chopping block on Monday Night.

All Damien Harris needed to do was meet his projection. But they should call him Daemon Harris because instead was dragon Pat down all night. Harris Harry Houdini'd and disappeared, vanishing Guilloteam from championship contention in the process.

But like I said, this loss came down to anger. Anger towards DJ Moore and the terrible season he's having. NOW LOOK HERE FOLKS, nobody is saying you should automatically start a player based on the name on the back of the jersey. And I also am low on DJ Moore this season. All I'm saying is Pat has stated his anger towards Moore and that's why he not only benched him in Headhunters but shipped him off to Out of Luck in the main LOC league for Devin Duvernay. Would any of you have started him over Courtland Sutton, who also was facing a good defense and also had a shitty QB at the helm? Maybe, maybe not. But that doesn't matter. What matters is that Pat benched him and he scored 21.38 points against Sutton's 5.50, and that's why he's going home.

The Guilloteam:

## Weeks Survived (2019 v 2020 v 2021 v 2022)

A better finish for Guilloteam this season but since there are four fewer teams this is actually his earliest elimination in franchise history.

## Dead Money

Keeping track of all the cash that never got spent by teams that are now eliminated.

Dead Money 2022

## New Releases

No new releases, so instead here are the top five players, one at each position, currently on waivers based off points scored.

1. Patrick Mahomes (again...Mahomes curse?? No one bid on him just to be safe)
2. Mark Andrews
3. Jalen Hurts
4. Devonta Smith
5. Amon-Ra St. Brown

## Week Seven Bidding Results

#### Quick-Hit Thoughts

* Crazy that Guilloteam spent over $500 on a QB last week, but then still had to pick up Taylor Heinicke off waivers for $2 to field a full team.
* Muller Lite snagging Henderson under everyone's noses for $16 while he was on a bye is a giant get. Wouldn't have paid off if LAR bagged CMC, but guess what? They didn't. Low risk steal.

## Money Spent Per Week

This was the least amount of money ever spent in a bidding period before week 13.

## Week Six Results

* Biggest Climber: Henry VIII (^6)
* Biggest Faller: Muller Lite (v7)

## Kings of the Castle

### 1. Beach McBungalow

You know you had a good week when Jonathan Taylor was the worst starting RB on your roster. He didn't need the bonus performance from Stevenson on MNF, but it certainly made a statement. Kenneth Walker is the genuine article and Andy Dalton proved to be the best $15 Nate has probably ever spent.

### 2. Bad Boys II - The Soundtrack

A general theme of the week was that QBs played pretty awful, but only one starting HH QB played so bad he got benched and that's Matt Cryin' Ryan. Lucky for Bad Boys, everyone else played fantastic aside from the Pitts of Despair. Kyle Pitts is so shockingly bad, at this point I feel like you have to start him simply due to statistical probability of him randomly breaking 10 points.

### 3. Henry VIII

Looked great after an off-performance last week but loses Easy Breece Beautiful Running Back to an ACL and there may not be a breakout star waiting in the wings because what are the odds Breece Lightning strikes twice on one roster?

### 4. burrow for sure-oh

When Joe Burrow goes on these scorched Earth fantasy rampages it's literally the scariest thing I've ever experienced. You do not want to be in the way of it. Last year it ended in the Super Bowl, but this year it's only week 7. Will it end without warning, or is this guy about to put up the biggest season in QB history?

### 5. Hasta Laviska Baby

Hasta has already secured his deepest run in franchise history, and with $1,000 still to spend he clocks in as one of the most dangerous high ceiling teams remaining. He's 5th in points having made just 3 roster moves and in week 7 he had every single player break 10 points.

## On the Chopping Block

### 10. Muller Lite

Insert Breaking Bad "he can't keep getting away with this" meme. Since joining the league several weeks into last season, Muller Lite has literally never finished in last place. He made it all the way to the championship game, which is a pure head-to-head and cannot even be considered a last place finish. And this year he's returned to his cockroaching ways and refuses to die. Maybe because as a Jets fan his soul is already dead.

### 9. deCaPitated

Speaking of dead, CP has felt like a rotting corpse for the last several weeks now after losing key players to season-enders in both leagues. The latest and greatest is Decay Metcalf, who avoids surgery but will miss some time. And then there is the Brady debacle. What to do with this broken man? We're down to 10 teams, it's high time that not all QBs are rostered...makes you think if Brady's time as a fantasy starter is over.

### 8. Wildcat (no QBs no problem)

Still having very few problems with very few QBs. Austin Fast as Heckeler continues to be a fantasy stud and James Robbed of all Fantasy Value-son might actually be good again now that he's on the run-first Jets. But Robert doesn't score a Tonyan so he'll have to address tight end very soon.

### 7. Out of Luck

Every week Papa thinks it is his week to go home, and every week he has been wrong (so far). This week he was forced to start JuJu over Ju.Jeff and against all odds it paid off because JJ-SS scored 33.60 points. Now that we're down to 10, Jared Goff might not cut it for QB2 with less than nine points.

### 6. Laser Rocket Arms

Color me impressed. A 6th-place finish with four starters on the bye, including MVP-hopeful Josh Allen, first round pick Dalvin Cook, and Philly superweapon AJ Brown. This team was teed up to get screwed by the non-elimination, but they got exactly what they needed from Monty, Brian Robinson, and Jimmy G, while Tyler Boyd blew up for 40 points and carried the scrubs like Danny One-Eye Bellinger and Brandin Can't Cooks.

## Average Scores of Eliminated Teams

Average Scores of Eliminated Teams
 The Executioner
 It's Blitz! Track 2
 Bobecue Chicken
 Mixon It Up With Mahomie
 CoachKnows

## Narrow Defeats

Margin of Defeat for Last Place Teams:

Margin of Defeat for Eliminated Teams
 It's Blitz! Track 2
 Bobecue Chicken
 The Executioner
 The Guilloteam
 Mixon It Up With Mahomie

## Rulers of the Kingdom

2022 first place finishers:

Seven weeks, seven different first place teams. All except for one still alive for the championship.

## Dungeon Dwellers

2022 teams that finished second-to-last, narrowly avoiding elimination:

## Single Season Scoring Records

As teams get eliminated, their single season performance will appear here.

Pat completes what was his worst scoring season.

## All-Time Combined Points Scored

Same as above: eliminated teams will have their 2022 season added to the total.

Last week I said Guilloteam was primed to break 9,000 this season, but he comes up short with this early elimination. He will hold first place on the all-time scoring list until CP's fourth season is added upon his season's end. Then the question becomes whether Laser Rocket Arms has what it takes to make a big run to the top.

## Remaining Budget

YUGE drop for Pat this week and he's officially out on all big names for at least the next couple of weeks as he can get big-dawged by just about anyone.