It Sphinx In Here

*Riddle Guy '97. If you weren't there, you'll never know. Festival flings, ancient dangers unexpectedly returning, and a daring plan to rescue a kidnapped crow. Yep, Riddle Guy '97 truly had it all. It sure was...one crazy summer.*

The 19th main canon episode of Rude Tales of Magic. With Riddle Guy nearing a close, the party rushes to rescue Stirfry from being burned alive.

## Summary

The party returns to their tent with Dodge Duranga. Dodge explains the finale of Riddle Guy; a huge wicker sphinx is built, which is burned in hopes of attracting a real sphinx when it's set ablaze. Each contender for this year's Riddle Guy sacrifice something they love, and whoever cries the hardest when they are burned is declared the new Riddle Guy. Horrified at the news, the party realizes Stirfry is missing. Dodge realizes that this is not seen as an honorable sacrifice to them and leads them off to intervene.

Stirfry awakens inside the wicker sphinx, left with many other sacrifices. While some are paintings of loved ones or possessions, he's also tied up alongside an elder dwarf Conrad Montcroy and Daniel Load who were offered for sacrifice. Rallying his fellow captives, Stirfry convinces Daniel to pass him his thief's tools and uses them to untie himself. They begin to carve their way out, but progress is slow.

The rest of the party arrives outside the fenced off area surrounding the sphinx. With no time to waste, they agree to send someone in as a contestant to become Riddle Guy. Bellow turns himself into a cat to sacrifice so he can work from the inside, and the party endorses Albee to participate. Frederick takes Albee aside to let her in on the true secret of riddles: there are no right answers. Whatever she says with enough confidence will do.

Albee takes in Bellow as her sacrifice, posing as a last minute entrant to the contest. She bluffs her way past Apollo Nasty's testing riddle, but Natalie Armpits becomes suspicious when she sees her. Apollo introduces the surprise guest, the all catfolk band Thunderlingus as the crowd goes wild. Natalie tries to call out the party's plan to ruin her chances of winning Riddle Guy, but Albee simply attacks her. Cordelia takes Albee's lead and starts a massive brawl with Ivan among the moshing crowd.

Bellow meets Stirfry in the wicker sphinx's leg, turning back into a tiefling and helping them smash their way out before the sphinx can be set ablaze. The party relaxes and starts to enjoy the show when a live sphinx Unwarranted Jinsica arrives. She roars and demands her riddle be answered, only to devour Apollo when he tries to preemptively answer with "man." She states the correct answer was going to be "the doctor was the patient's mother" and that the listener should "examine their biases." She instead turns to Albee and poses an original riddle about three friends that meet Death. Albee realizes that the sphinx referred to Death as a she, and states that the third friend was going to examine her biases. Albee is given the right to riddle Jinsica in return. Albee asks what walks on 4 legs in the morning, 2 legs in the afternoon, and 3 legs in the evening. When the sphinx answers “man,” Albee corrects her that the answer is woman and to reexamine her expectations. Mortified, Jinsica hurls herself to her death into the blazing wicker sphinx and is immediately struck by lightning. Bellow finds and kisses Dodge Duranga goodbye and Albee unceremoniously passes the title of Riddle Guy onto Natalie before the party revels in their victory throughout the concert.

## Trivia

* The music that plays during Thunderlingus' concert is done by Diarrhea Planet, using their song Ghost With A Boner.

## Quotes

* “I’m terrible at riddles... but I’m really good at crying.”

## Link

https://rudetalesofmagic.simplecast.com/episodes/it-sphinx-in-here