Two Edgy Teens Dissociate in Detention

*2020, April 9*

Kurt sits down at the small combo desk chair setting their satchel onto the floor and just leaning forward resting their head on the desk. They had been lucky to only get detention. It was the first time they had got caught smoking at school. Principal Crossover wasn’t as much a hardass as she wanted to let on. Kurt figured that’s why Coach Harold was the person sitting at the front of the room. Harold’s phone was playing the latest Kyle Brandin video with the coach himself staring intently at it. They sit up and pull their English notebook from their satchel starting to write into it. Kurt looks up hearing the doorknob click open.

The door slowly swings open as Boon enters the room. She gives a curt nod towards Coach Harold and turns towards the desks to begin picking a seat. Boon finds herself making eye contact with Kurt and freezes in place. *Oh fuck, oh gods oh geez oh man oh fuck. Please Freya don’t make me spend detention with the person who hates me most on this Earth.* Boon forces a smile and waves awkwardly at Kurt.

*Be nice for Ernest. BE NICE FOR ERNEST.* Kurt tenses briefly as their eyes met. Forcing their own smile in return and giving a far less awkward wave. They turn back to their work writing slightly slower and occasionally glancing at where Boon was headed. *Please don’t sit next to me.*

*So option A: sit as far away as possible, option B: attempt to talk to them, option C: run. What would Atlanta do here?* In Boon’s mind a chibi version of Verve appears and says “You should really try to patch things up with your teammate, especially if they’re dating one of your best friends” Following the advice of her imaginary girlfriend Boon moves to sit immediately next to Kurt. “H-hey... Kurt… Long time no see buddy. How’ve you been lately?”

*Fuck.* “Pretty alright, Boon. How about yourself?” *How’s hell this time of year?* Kurt thought mockingly in their head. They set their pencil down and turned towards where Boon was sitting. Their faux smile is gone and their voice is fairly flat as they spoke again. “Yeah, it’s been a while. Was there something you wanted?”

Boon scratches the back of her neck nervously and also drops her fake smile. “Okay, I’m not great at subtlety so I’m just gonna get right into it” she breaks eye contact with Kurt and frowns at the top of her desk “So I’ve done some fucked up shit huh?” Boon resumes eye contact.

”One way of putting it.” Kurt rests their hands on their lap. Their intensely green eyes staring back into Boon’s. One hand begins to slightly tighten around their thigh. *Certainly needs some help with apologies.* “Not to be rude but like that’s all you got? I mean stick with that if you want but it’s kind of a nonstarter.”

Boon immediately scowls. “Did I say I was finished?” she begins angrily before relaxing her brow a bit. “Sorry I- look, I’ve had a lot of time to think about the people that I’ve hurt in the past. And I can apologize and promise to be better and shit but we both know that’s not going to undo anything” Boon closes her eyes and clutches her forehead “Actions speak louder than words so… if there’s anything I can do to make it up to you… let me know.”

Kurt takes a long breath to hold themself back from just blowing up at Boon. Normally they would have but this was Ernest’s friend. “I don’t want to be a dick to you and I don’t want to make my boyfriend anymore uncomfortable with stuff like this with his friends. If you’re not going to apologize, I don’t care for your help or your company.” Kurt’s glare intensifies as their brow furrows. “Words do matter to me. So stop talking like you know me.”

Boon opens her eyes again which reveals a frustrated glare. "Oh okay then! You want me to say it out loud? I'm sorry. Happy now? I'm sorry for hurting you. And I'm *sorry* for almost dragging you to a hellish pocket dimension. S. O. R. R. Y." Boon huffs and crosses her arms. She turns away from Kurt and looks towards the front of the classroom at the teacher who is still watching videos on his phone.

“Thank you, Barbara.” Their voice flat as ever. *God, she really isn’t fit to be a part of a heroic legacy.* Kurt turns back to their notebook and straightens up as they start to write in it again. “It’s okay to not want to say that. Just don’t pout when you know you were in the wrong? It’s a really bad look to be insincere.”

"Look. I'm not trying to be insincere, I'm just not the best with words and you're making this extremely difficult" she turns towards Kurt with an accusatory glare "Also, quick tip that you should know given who you're dating. When someone doesn't like to be called something it's a low blow to call them that anyway. Even if you're right to be angry at them"

*She’s right that was a shitty thing to do.* ”Listen, I wouldn’t call my boyfriend anything besides what he wants. I understand you might feel this is me being extremely difficult. However, I have felt unlistened to in this conversation and am really frustrated.” Kurt slows their writing. His gaze staring daggers into the page. “I just wanted you to say sorry explicitly and you made that into a joke. I am sorry to have called you that, Boon. It wasn’t right and won’t happen again.”

Boon’s gaze shifts downwards as an expression of guilt and sadness washed over her face. “Fuck, I’m doing it again aren’t I. Kurt, I’m- I really am sorry, about everything. And I’m sorry for not listening to you. I’ve been trying to work on improving myself and I just… do this shit all the time” Boon sighs.

Kurt drops the pencil and looks over at Boon. Their face was the neutral expression they had held throughout the conversation but there was a sadness in their green eyes. “I get it. Thanks for apologizing. We all have room for improvement so it’s okay to be working on shit. Just like don’t take it out on people that don’t deserve it.”

Boon rests her elbows on the table and runs her hands through her curly platinum hair. "I um… I also wanted to say that I'm really happy for you… I was excited to hear about you and Ernest. You've both been through a lot and I'm glad you two have someone."

They flush deeply and glance away from Boon towards the front. Harold lets out a boisterous laugh at the video on his phone making Kurt sink into their chair a bit. “Thanks, it’s weird to have things work out like this for once. It’s really nice to have someone to turn to who just gets you.”

Boon smiles and blushes while thinking about Atlanta. "I know what you mean. A few months ago I had nobody. I kept driving people away because of my own… stuff. Now I'm with Atlanta and it's just been so incredible. I didn't even think I was going to be alive much longer until recently and now I just feel so… cared about."

”Yeah I get that. It all feels so fleeting. We don’t know how long we’re gonna be here for. Or did you mean something bigger than just general mortal anxiety?” Kurt lets out a sigh. “It must have been very scary if it was more than that. The constant pressure of an ending is always hard.”

The conversation had been dancing around talks of Sapphomet thus far but thinking about exactly how close she came to having her soul devoured puts Boon on edge. Her heart begins to palpitate as the memory of losing control of her body and dragging her friends into a fiery pocket dimension plays in her head. Boon becomes self conscious of the fact that her breathing has grown fast and shallow. “It was um, yeah it was really scary. I- I don’t really like thinking about it though. I’m just glad that it’s over and that I never have to worry about her anymore.” She’s silent for a moment as she concentrates to slow down her breathing. “Ernest and Atlanta helped me through all of it though. I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for them.” Boon turns to Kurt. Her gray eyes betray a look of recent panic despite the soft smile crossing her face “That’s the thing about Ernest. Even when he’s angry at you you can trust him to be there for you.”

*Huh, ‘her,’ maybe there is some family trouble or something I don’t know about.* “I am glad you were able to make it through that.” As Boon talks about camaraderie, Kurt thinks back to their time in Gambite. Images of magic glyphs forcibly forming on their body. A mind inside of them that was their own yet not. The sensation of hopelessness that Future Kurt’s control exerted. Worse than that though to Kurt was the fear of FK taking control again and if they split again. Kurt visibly shuddered. Splitting had left a sensory overload that had felt like reliving every second of your life in a moment. All the pain, all the joy, and all the utter boredom. Even the memory made him stop breathing for a moment before drawing in a slow long but quiet breath. “Yeah, it must be nice to have folks looking out for you like that. It’s almost impossible to overcome if you have nowhere to turn.” Kurt returns the soft smile. It was a worn out expression that did nothing to hide the exhaustion underneath the facade. “He’s good like that yeah. Ernest has a loyalty to him that’s kinda fierce. It’s stupid cute.”

*Oh no, he doesn't look so good. Did I say something triggering? I probably don't look so hot myself, I haven't thought about Sapphomet since the other week. Fuck, I didn't expect that to cause such a toll on me.* Boon scratches the back of her head nervously. "Hey so uh, speaking of finding people to turn to: how've you been doing with the team? I haven't like, had any missions with you yet or anything. But are people being like, cool to you? Besides Ernest obviously" *Why would you ask that? You know full well what people are saying behind their back.*

”About what I expected. So, nah, they aren’t.” Their voice still had a tired sharpness to it. *Always ready to bite aren’t I? Even when tired. I mean she is trying to put on a good face despite what we were talking about but you look past the general aura and you can tell. Guess she might have some coping skills.* They sat up a bit in their chair. “People can say what they want though. The one thing that bothers me is I don’t know if folks think about this but I have experience and am capable. They treat me as if I haven’t lived in Halcyon all my life, as if I don’t know what it means to be a hero, as if I can’t be that.” Kurt shook their head. *Slow down, don’t go off.* “I mean this in the best way but if some of you fuck-ups are trying to be heroes then I sure as hell deserve a chance. Like Anaya is on the team for fuck’s sake.”

*I feel like I'm supposed to be angry about this but they're absolutely right.* "You know, having been that fuck up plenty of times you're really not far off. Like, there's no reason for people to distrust you that doesn't apply to someone else on the team. I don't want to be like- performative but I don't care that Anaya was in Gambite and I don't care that you technically were either. And honestly does anyone here know how to be a hero? Glass houses and all that." Boon sighs with exhaustion "I know what it's like to be silently judged; to be talked about when people think you aren't listening. There's this girl on my roller derby team. She's really talented and I could see us being friends but she just- hates my guts. And I have no idea why either. She wrote this whole 'anonymous' article about how I'm exploiting my 'hero status' to get fielded as a jammer more. And she has a little clique that agrees with her. I don't want to let it get to me because- like- I'm the tough one you know? Why do I care what she thinks of me? But it hurts… and I can't pretend like it doesn't hurt…" tears are visible welling up in Boon's eyes. *You can't let them see you be vulnerable like this, you have an image to maintain Bobby.*

”It's okay to hurt. I get it. It hurts to have someone hate and judge you for no reason.” *Wow, Harold, not even noticing the girl almost crying here.* Kurt rubbed at their jacket sleeve and their glance reflected their sympathy trying not to let their gaze linger. “You care because you know you deserve better. You know you shouldn’t be treated like that.” They spoke slowly and with an aura of self-deliverance. “I am sorry for how you were treated. Just because you are the tough one doesn’t mean you can’t express yourself. You need time to deal with your bullshit just as much as anyone else.” They shifted facing Boon yet again holding the look of the other teen. “Also just because you could see someone being a good part of your life doesn’t mean they are. Don’t be afraid to cut out assholes. We could also definitely find you a nicer team or something? It’s a big city. For now though, it is okay to just let yourself feel.”

Boon wipes the tears from her eyes and sniffles. "Thanks. Kurt. I- I know we're not on the best terms, so I appreciate the kind words. I don't think I can leave my team but you're right, I don't need to keep just taking this from her. I'm gonna say something." She attempts to smile "Also, my offer still stands. If you need anything from me or need me to talk to anyone for you just let me know. You're a member of our team and you deserve to be treated better."

Kurt gives a half-nod. “No problem. I hope that works out and folks self-reflect upon being called-out.” They looked over at the clock. It was getting close to the end of detention. “I am on the team. That doesn’t mean I’ll ever really be a part of it. I appreciate the welcome though. I’ll be fine. Folks are allowed to think what they want. It isn’t too much more grief than normal.”

Boon feels sad at hearing this but understands that she isn't in a position to solve Kurt's problems for them. As Kurt looks up at the clock Boon's gaze follows and she realizes that she did not get the work done that she was supposed to while in detention. "I think our time's almost up here. Um… are we cool?"

Kurt was already putting away their stuff. *Probably wouldn’t have gotten much work done anyways.* ”Cool enough to not be actively hating each other. I guess we’ll see about more than that?”

Boon stands up and slings her backpack over her shoulder. She grins at Kurt "Sounds like a good start. I'll see you around Kurt."

The boy stands holding their satchel close to their chest. They give a small smile in return. “See you then, Boon.”