Robbing the Bank

**Robbing the Bank** is the fourth episode of The Super Wario Bros. Wah-wah Show!

## About

Wario sees an ad for a spanking new TV, and then his team executes another robbery.

## Cast

### **X-Men**

* Wario
* Waluigi
* Bowser

### **Koopa Mafia**

* Dry Bones
* Some tiny moron that nobody cares about
* Boo
* Koopa
* Goomba

### **The Fantastic Four**

* Mario
* Luigi

### **Other Peeps**

* Mr. Jenkins
* Another tiny moron that absolutely no one cares about

## Script

### **Scene 1: We Gotta Get That TV!**

**WARIO** is watching TV in the living room. **WALUIGI** enters the room.

> **WALUIGI:** Hey, **WARIO**! Guess wha-
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> **WARIO:** Shush it! I'm watching TV.
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> **SHOPPING CHANNEL NARRATOR:** And we got this *noice* TV, costs about $1,000. Just about everything you need in a TV and more, very brilliant! Only available online at our website, failmart.com.
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> **WARIO:** Oh my god.. I need that TV!
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**BOWSER** walks into the room.

> **BOWSER:** Hey, boss! What- ..Are you seriously watching the Failmart Shopping Channel?
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> **WARIO:** Yes, why?
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> **BOWSER:** You do know that Failmart is full of fail, right? I mean, come on! It's in their name! The things they have never work right!
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> **WARIO:** Whatever it fails at, I'm sure I can hire somebody to make it work. Anyone got money so I can buy this TV?
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> **BOWSER:** I got 50 cent!
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> **WALUIGI:** And I just got-
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> **WARIO:** *Quiet,* **WALUIGI**! No one wants to listen to you!
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> **WALUIGI (grumbling to himself):** Fine, I'll just use the $1,500 for cheese...
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> **WARIO:** Well, it's obvious that none of you have the money, so I have a plan. We rob the bank!
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> **BOWSER:** Wait, rob the bank? Can't we just steal the TV itself?
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> **WALUIGI:** But it said it's only available online.
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> **WARIO:** Yeah, it clearly said that, **BOWSER**. Weren't you listening?
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> **BOWSER:** ..I wasn't even there when it said that, so I didn't know!
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> **WARIO:** Whatever. Everyone get your robber masks and stuff, we're goin' to the bank!
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### **Scene 2: This is Another Robbery!**

**WARIO**, **BOWSER**, and **WALUIGI** are just outside the bank, wearing the robber stuff.

> **WARIO:** Remember, guys, after we take the money, we don't stop for anything. We run straight to our house. I don't want the Koopa Mafia trying to mess with our plans again.
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> **BOWSER:** Deal.
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> **WALUIGI:** Yeah, that was a whole mess.
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The trio then pushes through the doors. **MR. JENKINS** can be seen at the front desk.

> **WARIO:** Wait, you work here too?! I-I mean- **EVERYONE GET YOUR DAMN FUCKING BODIES ON THE GROUND RIGHT THIS INSTANT!!**
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> **WALUIGI:** Guy at the front desk, don't you move!
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Everyone drops on the ground except **MR. JENKINS**.

> **MR. JENKINS:** Wait, what did you want me to do? Did you want me to get on the ground or not move?
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> **BOWSER:** It would be good if you showed us the loot, mothafucka!
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The sirens are blaring at this point.

> **MR. JENKINS:** Well, fine.
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**MR JENKINS** starts to go to the back, albeit very slowly. **BOWSER** cocks his gun.

> **BOWSER:** *Go faster, maggot!* We don't have all damn day!
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**MR. JENKINS** continues to be slow. Just when **BOWSER** was about to shoot him, **MARIO** suddenly appears and knocks out **BOWSER** with a ground pound to the head.

### **Scene 3: Aw shit, it's the Mario Brothers!**

> **WARIO:** **BOWSER**! Oh, no.. It's the Mario Brothers!
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**MARIO** and **LUIGI** stands in the center of the bank. Police sirens can be heard.

> **MARIO:** We shall not stand for your crimes, you fartudinous lump of poo!
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> **LUIGI:** I suggest you exit the bank peacefully to police custody before we do the same thing to you as we did to **BOWSER**!
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> **WARIO:** You fools!! I will show you both why you shouldn't mess with the X-Men!
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> **WALUIGI:** Yeah, bring it!
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At this point, every innocent has been escorted out of the building for their safety, while **MR. JENKINS** is hiding in the back.. They all fight. **WARIO** and **WALUIGI** are noticeably struggling against **MARIO** and **LUIGI**.

> **WARIO:** First the Koopa Mafia, now the brothers themselves...
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> **MARIO:** I have the upper hand, **WARIO**! You best give up while you can!
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**WARIO** has been holding up a fart for the past three days...

> **WARIO:** You think you can just mess with me like this? ***I THINK NOT!***
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**WARIO** lets out an Atomic Fart, blowing the bank up and killing every police and innocent in the vicinity of the bank. **WARIO**, **WALUIGI**, **BOWSER**, **MARIO**, and **LUIGI** survived. **MR. JENKINS** also managed to survive, although he fainted from the foul stench like **MARIO** and **LUIGI** just did.

> **WARIO:** Can't believe it had to come to that...
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> **WALUIGI:** *\*cough\** Let's get outta here!!
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**WARIO** and **WALUIGI** gets out of the vicinity of the Atomic Fart, with both struggling to carry **BOWSER**. They head home. Meanwhile, nearby, some Koopa Mafia members were coming out of a cinema.

> **SOME TINY MORON THAT NOBODY CARES ABOUT:** That movie su- Wait, what the hell?
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They all notice the Atomic Fart gases at what is left of the bank.

> **DRY BONES:** Looks like we missed out on one of the X-Men's schemes.
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> **BOO:** Wasn't the bank just there?
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> **KOOPA:** Yes, it would appear that **WARIO** activated his last measure..
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### **Scene 4: Aftermath of Another Failure**

The three are back at the house, with **BOWSER** still knocked out. He's lying down on the couch.

> **WALUIGI:** Well, can't say that went better than the candy incident...
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> **WARIO:** No duh, **WALUIGI**! Now we can't get the TV!
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> **WALUIGI:** Wait a second...
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> **WARIO:** What?
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> **WALUIGI:** I just remembered something that I was trying to tell you earlier before you cut me off. I won 1,500 in paper money from the lottery.
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> **WARIO:** *Whaat?!* Why didn't you tell me sooner?!!
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> **WALUIGI:** Didn't you hear what I just said? ..Anyways, I still have the money.
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> **WARIO:** Well, that's good! Wait... You said paper money, right? Don't we need to convert that to digital? Like, online? Like in my Paypal?
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> **WALUIGI:** ...Uh...
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> **WARIO:** Nevermind! Nevermind. Forget about the new TV. It was destined to fail anyways, just like **BOWSER** said.
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**WARIO** goes upstairs to his bedroom.

> **WALUIGI:** Well, looks like I'll be buying cheese after all.
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**WALUIGI** heads outside to go to the Cheese Store. Meanwhile, **DRY BONES** sees him from the distance.

> **DRY BONES:** ..Perfect!
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The Koopa Mafia beats up and kidnaps **WALUIGI** as the screen fades to black...

## Trivia

* The "Shopping Channel Narrator" is rumored to be Another tiny moron that absolutely no one cares about.
* This episode is an example of how dangerous the Atomic Fart can be.
* The bank was Mr. Jenkins' main job. His side job is the candy store from previous episode.
* The movie theater happened to have soundproof walls, which is the sole reason why the Koopa Mafia ended up not hearing the Atomic Fart.