Asznee Smiley

Asznee Alexander Smiley (born 16 April 1982) is the office manager at Thornton Stationery Kensington & Chelsea Branch hired by Cecil Longstaff on the 20th of June 2022. Smiley attended Sandhurst Military academy from September 2000 to June 2004. He is a strict man of serious integrity with major anger management issues.

Asznee was raised in Norwich by his parents - Alicia and Damien. He was obsessed with the military from a young age, and always planned on attending the Sandhurst Military Academy. Asznee picked GCSE PE along with Triple Science, Business and Wood Technology. Asznee was temporarily suspended from his school at the age of 15 due to one of his anger outbursts. During a mock exam for Maths, he noticed that the person sitting next to him was cheating. He shouted ''Cheaters get stitches'', and then grabbed the cheater by the scruff of it's neck, and threw it against the wall. Asznee was praised for his commitment to test rules, but was still suspended. He was devastated and paid 20 pounds to his head teacher.

Asznee was ferociously feared at Sandhurst, and quickly graduated with honours. Asznee enlisted in the Royal British Army in 2005, where he stayed until 2009. Asznee was a reserve, and quickly rose to the rank of Chief Lieutenant. He was expelled from the Army due to his anger issues.

Cecil Longstaff ran into Smiley at a nightclub in East London on the 14th of June 2022. Cecil was thoroughly amused by Asznee, and let him know about a job opening for Office Manager at the Kensington & Chelsea Branch of Thornton Stationery. Cecil was awaiting becoming Regional Manager following Denzel Pepper's announcement of resignation on the 3rd of June 2022. Asznee called the H.R. Department of Kensington and Chelsea for a job interview and arrived at the office on the 17th of June 2022. He was unimpressed by the state of the office. He did not like the fact that everyone's desk was decorated and personalised. When he arrived at the annex, where the H.R. Office was situated, he was not impressed by his interviewer. Vlad Petrov. Vlad was eating a donner kebab, which was spilling on his shirt. Asznee shouted at Vlad commanding him to pay attention. Vlad laughed and laughed and said ''Chicken belly chicken nights'' Vlad began the interview and half an hour later, Asznee walked out of the office with a confirmation of Employment.

Asznee began working on the 20th of June 2022. He immediately took a liking to Bernard Smith, another man of high discipline, however he was not a fan of how relaxed the office was being conducted by Regional Manager Cecil Longstaff. Cecil alerted Asznee that a wild snake was on the loose in the office. Cecil was teriffied of snakes, and he heard that Asznee hated snakes due to troubles from his military days. Asznee, despite not particualrly caring for Cecil's style of management was fiercly loyal to authority, and went to seek out the snake. He found it in the break room, where he chopped it's head off with the side of his hand. After leaving the office, he worked himself up into a frenzy much like a viking berzerker. Darius of the sales team and Demetrius of Customer Relations were chatting away in the H.R. Annex, which greatly angered Asznee. He applied red face paint to his face, and screamed at them. They laughed at him.

On the 21st of June, Asznee arrived to work in another frenzy, and screamed at Osmund Parris in the morning. Osmund knocked him to the ground. During this, Denzel Pepper, former regional manager and new President of Greater London sales walked in to consult with Cecil.

## Gallery

Asznee finding the snakeAsznee about to chop the snakeAsznee overhearing Darius and Demetrius gossipingAsznee running to Darius and DemetriusAsznee shouting at Darius and DemetriusAsznee clearing out Jasper's cupboardAsznee flipping a table in the break roomAsznee about to punch a wallAsznee mad at Osmund