Adam

*Not to be confused with Adam Paloian*

**Adam** is a roommate of Chris O'Neill and the result of Chris and Cory injecting their jizz into an egg, from which he hatched and learnt to play *Frogger* by trying to cross the road.

What Adam lacks in—most things—he more than makes up for by being a boner-fied sexual tyrannosaurus. None are immune from his rugged alpha-male magnetism—he has seduced everyone from French lesbians, a Russian man, and even his friend's evil Indian "spunk crack" ex-girlfriend. He has been invited to at least two threesomes and has been in orgies since he was a child—with his bud and their pillows.

His cummies are in such high demand that even when he treats girls like shit, they hound him for it every day. Adam's misadventures in the bedroom have come up several times in discussion. For example, he kicked his ex's head off for sucking his nuts, and was subjected to creepy chewing ASMR after bedding a crystaller. Ironically, Adam doesn't even like having sex.

Adam is surprisingly worldly. He is known to have lived in Japan and France before settling in the States—no doubt leaving a trail of pussy-tears in his wake. Even so, he still is somehow a little ignorant of the world, such as not knowing anything about German engineering or the schnershitzel.

## Physical Appearance

Adam appears as a humanoid figure of above average height, being slightly taller than Chris, with the traditional OneyPlays look that most members have. Adam’s most noticeable feature is his head shape, which makes him look like the rook piece from chess. Adam also wears a white tank top alongside a red cape.

In Episode 1 of Pizza Tower, Chris shows a photograph of who he claims is Adam in real life. If true, this would mean Adam in real life is an Asian man with scruffy black hair and a beard.

## Appearances

* Dark Souls Remastered
* Dark Souls II
* Dying Light
* FIFA 22
* Fortnite (From Episode 2 Onwards)
* Frogger: The Great Quest
* Kirby and the Forgotten Land (Demo)
* LEGO City Undercover
* Noita (Donation Stream, Debut)
* Pac-Man 2: The New Adventures
* Pipe Dream
* Pokémon Legends: Arceus
* Postal 2
* Priest Simulator
* Runescape
* Sly Cooper and the Thievius Raccoonus
* Undertale
* Toontown Rewritten

## Quotes

* "Oh yeah"
* "You Fragget!"
* "I didn't even like sex"
* "\*gasp\* PRONOUNS!"
* "Um, on one hand..."
* " I lost the lyrics.. My sheet music has disappeared.."

## Trivia

* Adam once got an Alienware PC for Christmas, which he dropped down the stairs a day later.
* Adam really enjoys the game Lego City Undercover.
* Adam once hosed down his kitchen to kill a fly, but continued to do so after the fact because "it was fun".
* Adam at some point lived in Japan as a child (As mentioned in the iconic "brother shits in bathtub drain" story)
* One time in a RuneScape stream, Adam said the fag-word.
* It is assumed that Adam is in some way illiterate, based upon his stilted and haphazard way of narrating in-game dialogue.
* According to Chris, Adam apparently owns a leather glove that he uses for toilet paper. Adam argues that he uses it for a lot more than toilet paper, however, he did not elaborate on what other uses it has.
* Adam can allegedly put a whole condom up his nose and pull it back out through his mouth.
* Adam once went to Disney with his family and ex-biatch and she woke him up at 2am to rub her back (it was his birthday so he said no) and she banged on his parents door. Later her mom called him and said sorry for her daughter being such a bitch. When they got back she started shitting on his porch; they then broke up.
* The only *Pokémon* game Adam ever "actually kind of enjoyed" was *Pokémon XD*.
* Adam's avatar is currently the only one out of the crew to feature sharp edges.
* Adam wants to do unmentionable things to Benatar from *Your Favorite Martian*.
* Adam likes "going commando". As such, his cock is ALWAYS out.
	+ He has also been described as having an "Octocock".
* At a young age, Adam used to call the ambulance a "Bed-bus".
* The longest series to feature Adam is Dark Souls, clocking in at 9 hours and 18 minutes.