Episode 9: World Wide Landlord

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## Episode Summary

Drew and Josiah discuss restructuring the current tenant and landlord hierarchy.

## Idea Details

* Idea: World Wide Landlord
* Creator of idea: Drew
* Purpose of idea: It would be better off if rather than having many many different landlords with no standard operating procedure for all landlords to reduce that into one governing body and I'm suggesting a single body actually we could term it "God". And I don't wanna say it's some sort of religious god but I think just a term like God just sort of cuts through everything and gets right to the heart of the point. And we could call this god the World Wide Landlord. And what we'll do we'll set up a bank. And on the first of the month we can put that money in the bank instead of giving it to a landlord. And then the bank appreciates money, that nest egg grows, and that would be funds for the World Wide Projects that we are working on.
* Timetable: This idea will take as long as it takes for a golden child to be born and then raised in the Teaching Cave. The golden sperm could be ejaculated tomorrow, it could be in 6,000-7,000 years.
* Idea details:
	+ God would be a golden stick figure idol with a fairly large head to be worshipped.
	+ God would be doing things like shrugging.
	+ God would be a mascot appearing in ads and would be depicted riding on the World Wide Train.
	+ God would not be animated - he would be a sentient being. Some sort of golden hybrid human.
		- This could be achieved by adding gold into the cum device as part of the artificial insemination process, like with Goldschläger.
		- More likely it will be a golden semen.
	+ God is not necessarily a cis-male. Could be a female or non-binary.
		- Note: See the image for what God will look like.
	+ After the golden child is born, it will be given checks every month to get it ready. This process would not start with checks, but with breast milk on the first of every month, like a Pavlovian response to get it ready. You would work your way up with bathing and going to school until you get to checks. At that point, the World Wide Landlord will be brought into the Teaching Cave to be shaped.
		- The Teaching Cave is separate from the World Wide Wax Museum Cave in that it is a place for learning, not entertainment.
		- The Teaching Cave will teach the World Wide Landlord his duties, which are mostly to receive money on the first of the month and to accumulate it in the bank account
	+ There will be a third can in each household to act as prayer lines that mimic prayer to Real-God. This can-and-string will go directly to the Learning Cave where the golden child lives.
		- While the World Wide Landlord has a palace, he stays in the Learning Cave like Batman.
	+ God will look like Golden Face Jim from the Threat Level Midnight episode of The Office (U.S.) if it is a man. But it could look like Pam or like if there had been a non-binary character on The Office (U.S.). Presumably it would look like them with gold faces.
	+ After sending a prayer to the World Wide Landlord, it will decide whether to answer the prayer. It has about the same consistency in responding to prayers as Real-God.
	+ Rent will be $4,000 WWD universally, when accounting for inflation.

## Notable Events

* This episode introduced a new catchphrase: "Atlas".
	+ Note: It was never repeated again.
* It was revealed that Drew becomes hostile at the mere suggestion that he talk about his feet. He would not disclose the type of shoes he wears despite being asked multiple times over the course of the episode.
* This episode introduced the popular Yin And Yang Theory.
	+ In discussing the meaning of 9 (which was brought up because of Episode 9), Drew and Josiah pointed out the eternal Yin And Yang qualities of the numbers 6 and 9.
	+ Drew revealed that he is a 9 and Josiah revealed that he is a 6. Note that these are in direct opposition to each other, so any views held by one of them will seem upside-down or topsy-turvy to the other one.
* Drew revealed his feet/shoe size is 6.
* World Wide Landlubber
* World Wide Polycule

## Notable Quotes

### Josiah

* "I don't sell ass."
* "So you're telling me that you let your landlord eat your ass out in lieu of rent."
* "Landlords are workers too. One day a month. Still work."

### Drew

* "Let me do a quick Google search for nicknames for the male G-spot."
* "C'mere sweetheart! Come here my little fur baby!"

## Trivia

* This episode was originally titled simply "World Wide Landlord" but was renamed to include the episode number.