Pizza John

Pizza John, more formally known as Pizza Isaac-Zachary Zacosa Arnoldino John XVII, is a slightly overweight, illiterate human male at the age of 50. Despite his illiteracy he is quite an accomplished individual hailing from a prestigious family, and a practitioner of the ancient culinary arts. Being highly skilled in the art of pizza making, he has won 13 medals in a row at the annual Crunktropolis Pizza Festival. He is also the founder and former head of the Crunktropolis Pizza Council, founder and former CEO of the pizza chain "Pizza (Only Good)", and former owner and operator of his family's pizza restaurant "John's Pizzeria" located in District 6.

## Early Life

Pizza John grew up in a family that has been practicing the art of pizza making for 17 generations, having cemented the John family name in pizza history as the oldest and most skilled in the business, operating at very one founded by Pizza John's direct ancestor, Giuseppe John.

When Pizza John was a child, he did not want to get into the pizza business. His parents would make him work so much at the restaurant that he would smell of tomato and pepperoni; something he would be mocked about at school. Fortunately he would not have to spend much more time in school, as his parents slowly increased how much time he spent at the restaurant and decreased time he spent at school

It was not a tragedy though as Pizza John began to love what he did, especially once he learned he was a natural at it. At the age of 13 his family saw it fit to begin training in ancient culinary arts in preparation for the 5 Trials of Pizza - A John family tradition that is shrouded in mystery.

## Later Life

At the age of 18, Pizza John finished the last of the 5 trials, the fifth of which being to beat his own father in culinary combat.

With the trials finished and his father beaten, he was officially given ownership of John's Pizzeria at a large ceremonial event attended by the all of the oldest food families in Crunktropolis.

It wasn't long until Pizza John had massive success in the industry, either. By the age of 23 he founded the separate pizza chain "Pizza (Only Good)" and grew it into an empire to rival even Pulatoni's, Greg's Gruel Stand, and Sam Hyde's Smoked Bugs and Bug Accessories. Shortly afterwards he founded the Crunktropolis Pizza Council as a body to regulate, certify, and protect all things pizza.

## Downfall

After 20 years of massive success, Pizza John became the de-facto most successful pizza entrepreneur in Crunktropolis history, earning enough money to guarantee retirement of the next 5 generations of the John family.

As they say, however, the bigger you are the harder you must fall. And Pizza John fell hard...

The rise of an individual known as "Brian" in the ancient culinary arts community to the title of "Master Chef" did not go unnoticed by anyone in the old families, especially Pizza John. Pizza John along with many others claimed Brian should not be recognized as Master Chef after only 2 years of training, and that his being a fusion was an unfair advantage in something that would normally take decades of dedication to achieve. Pizza John claimed himself superior to Brian, and that the only reason why he himself had not earned the title of master was because "[he] was too busy slingin' 'za". Pizza John, in an attempt to bring down Brian, did something that had not happened in centuries: He, a non master, challenged Master Chef Brian to a duel of ancient culinary arts.

Much to the dismay of many, the resulting duel was not televised or publicly witnessed as dictated by tradition, and what happened during it is kept secret to all those uninitiated in the arts. What is known however, is that according to tradition a battle like this must have ultimate stakes, with ultimate displays of power and skill.

Another thing that will ultimately be known is the result, one that many liken to a god loosing his godhood.

After the 20th day of competition, a winner was declared, and it was not Pizza John. The ancient knowledge of 16 generations before could only get him so far as he was simply no match to the power of a fusion. As a result of his loss, as dictated by tradition, he was now obligated to give up all he and his family had ever built, and all that he had created thus far. He left his chain, he left his family business, he left the council, and he left all influence he had in the industry.

Having to give up all his possessions and money, he was forced to build himself back up.

## Where is he now

Years later, Pizza John is now struggling to pay rent at his run down studio apartment in District 12. Despite not being thrilled with the way his life is now, he accepts it as the result of his own hubris. Thus far, he has been optimistic in building himself back up and continues to vow that he will one day return and challenge Master Chef Brian once again.

To his delight, he has managed to raise enough funds over time to start his most recent business venture "The Pizza Van" wherein he makes pizza and delivers it to people in an iconic yellow van, offering to sit down and eat with the customer and chat and give advice. Believe it or not this offer is usually taken as Pizza John remains an admired figure in his community, representing the potential to rise out of the destitution that so plagues District 12

## Trivia

Despite his downfall, many people still exclusively buy from him. Kenny Cheddar himself can be quoted as saying "His pizza is good, what can I say? POGs and John's Pizzeria just don't taste the same without him there."