The Space Times (Issue 1)

# WAR HAS BEEN DECLARED!

***Cycle 0, 2:30 PM Galactic Space Time.***

Officials across the galaxy today have made it known that all of known space is now in a state of war. This marks the beginning of the Fifth Great Space War. These events have been triggered by the recent re-assassination of the Archduke of Space, Franz Spacinand. The perpetrators of this atrocity remain unknown, and so far no major empire or terrorist group has claimed accountability for this gross act of rebellion against the gods.

As a result, the Space Gods held a press conference yesterday at 5:00 PM, Galactic Time, announcing that the galaxy was now formally in a state of war. Government bodies across the entire greater octopus area are struggling to respond to this missive, and though no acts of war have been committed yet, the galaxy today witnessed the greatest mass expansion of territory since the start of the Second Great Space War. Many experts have warned that, between the commandments of the gods, and the recent explosive acts of expansion, armed conflict at this point seems inevitable.

And now, over to our resident sports AI BALL-CAST0R who, due to budget cuts, will be taking over the political rundown on the galaxy as a whole.

## The Galaxy as it Stands

Thanks Jorgo.

Well folks its a fine time to ~~be a sports fan~~ be at war, as the entire galaxy appears to have turned into one giant octopus shaped free for all. No longer legally bound to their own home systems, every major team out there is getting out on the turf and scoring some points for the home team.

Currently leading the pack are the Zultan, tied neck and neck with ~~sportsball~~ galactic newcomers the Spicy Ones, though this game is too close to call right now as every side seems to be growing faster than my processors can handle.

No major plays by any known teams today, sportsfans, but keep an eye out on the field! Because this is going to be one hell of a ride.

The Current Galactic Score

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## A Central Alliance?

Earlier today Turtleking for Life Tort. L IV of the Turtlekin Empire released a proposition of alliance to all of the other known sentient races of the galactic core. The announcement, which our people were able to obtain through a freedom of information act request, went as follows:

> Fellow members of the Galactic Core:
>
>
> We live in dark times. Since the assassination of the Space-Archduke, war has been declared a legal necessity by the cosmic gods. Although our top turtle-priests and high priestess are hard at work beseeching the wisdom of the ancients for a way to end this unfortunate state of events, until then we must do what we can to stand strong against the forces of chaos.
>
>
> We central empires are in a dire predicament, beset on all sides by one-another, with no choice for expansion but through our neighbors. Yet still, I would argue we are stronger together than apart. Our neighbors on the galactic edge would happily pray upon each of us should we enter into war with each other.
>
>
> And they, largely, do not have neighbors of their own to worry about, as we do.
>
>
> And so I propose an alliance. Though the gods forbid a true peace, I would propose a temporary alliance is in order. The Central Alliance.
>
>
> The terms are such:
>
>
> From the next cycle, until cycle 11, all members pledge not to attack one another.
>
>
> In addition, all members pledge to come to the aid of any member who is attacked.
>
>
> Finally, each member is encouraged to share technology with each other in the name of peace and prosperity.
>
>
> Our bureaucrats have been busy drafting the paperwork for this alliance for the past 15 business decades, and all that remains is for each of you to sign.
>
>
> What say you?
>
>
>
> Ever for the Grand Shell,
>
>

As of time of writing, it is not known how, or if, any of the recipients of this proposal responded.

## Mysterious Signals

Around 5:30 PM of Galactic Cycle 0, scientists across the galaxy were confused by the sudden appearance of a mysterious signal, which although compatible with most universal communication buffers, were indecipherable as a language. The signal seemed to originate from PX Primus, known for being a natural wildlife preserve for Jelly Leviathans.

This occurrence has sparked a resurgence in conspiracy theories about the sentient nature of Jellyfish life, however little to no actual evidence has been presented to support this theory at this time. Indeed, last year's research funded in part by the Fenrir Whaling Conglomerate and the Turtlekin Aquaculture Bureau, has shown conclusively that Jellies do not have the capacity for higher thought or communication.

## Editorials

No Editorials available at this time. If you would like to contribute, please feel free to link to a page below labelled in the format:

"Space Times 1 Editorial: Title"

Where "1" is the number of the issue, and "Title" is the title of your editorial.

## New Pages on the Wiki

The following new pages of interest have popped up on the wiki in the last cycle. (Feel free to add your own!)

* Fenrir Commerce LLC
* Turtlekin Empire
* Tomfoolians
* Spicy Ones
* The All Seeing DVORAK
* Jellies
* Owls of Prey