The Seven Stages Of Ascension

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**The Seven Stages Of Ascension** Are Symptoms That Say That You Are Gonna Ascend Soon, It Isnt As Severe As The 14 Tasks Of Transcending

## Being Powerless (Stage 1)

The First Stage Is Very Simple, You Are Powerless, However, You Can Create A Light Yellow Ball That Breaks Into Tiny Bits Shortly After Created, However That Cant Be Even Considered A Power Since It Does Almost No Damage To Enemies And Cant Do Other Stuff Powers Do

Its Shards However, They Can Create Some Awesome Grim Reapers And Can Cut BRICKS Into Quarters

Legends Say That Their Shards Can Cut Even Bedrock If Stacked Into A Big Enough Amount (And By That I Mean 1 Billion Shards)

## Fully stacked rocc (Stage 2)

The second stage comprises 4 sub-stages.

1. First sub-stage: Your Reddit and Discord account will both be deactivated. Attempting to create a new account is futile, as it will be instantly deleted from an external source. Studies have shown that while this effect takes place, your boddie's HuMe L e V e l will be significantly i n c r e a s e d, resulting in proneness to succmeboi.exe.
2. Second sub-stage: A satellite orbiting a random planet in sp a c ee will immediately deactivate. Research has implied that the location and identification of the satellite depends on proximity, randomness, and avoidance of reading.
3. Third sub-stage: On precisely 7.00 p.m. every day, you see a piece of blacc rocc tumble into your presence. The rocc **g l o w s** with extreme energy. Theorized utilization of said rocc for SUCC tests is unconfirmed. Upon contact with the rocc, it will erupt a poisonous plume of electricity, which will then alter its form into a snake and attack the pre-ascendant, however he/she/they/it will survive. The snake is extremely hostile and will be successful in k i l l i n g all entities nearby apart from the person about to ascend.
4. Fourth sub-stage: An image will intercept your lunch. It will resemble the snake that attempted to d e s t r o i e you just now. Interception degree of image and lunch varies from 23k7e + 3@3 to %3n8.

Following the sub-stages, a piece of paper will gracefully ride to your house, and the next stage is initiated.

## Following the waes of QWERTY (Stage 3)

The third stage will mean that a journey is bound. Often this journey will be a short one, but you will meet with horrid **m o n s t e r s**. Recorded monsters include:

* Separatist-Orangists
* Picardia faces
* UUUUU
* Cancer
* a spider the size of an island. This being was created by coolguys to stop heroes from mowing their lawn. Warning is that surreal science is not help leg no, as well as compulsory. Tests have shown that the spider is repelled by CC-BY-SA.
* Omniscronchulon[*citation needed*]
* QWERTY, a mysterious creature that resembles the original creator of this page, GammaRaul. He is a hoomann, but speaks surreal speakk. He is dress'd in a blacc robe. He will tell you that he is QWERTY, and that he is willing to help you destroy other monsters. Then, he will tell you how to get to the end of the journey.

The pre-ascendant will succeedd, then immediately feel hungry. You wil then go to the nearest S00Ubway for some steank breadd. This will lead to the initiation of Stage 4.

## Spiral of doom (Stage 4)

The 4th stage comprises 7 sub-stages.

* 1st sub-stage: You shall be rewarded a piece of meme essence at the end of your journey. The essence will be gifted by a clicc instead. The clicc will be caught 13 minutes later and sentenced to ***YAMNATION*** for wandering out of his c o m p u T e.
* 2nd sub-stage: Same as stage 2's 3rd sub-stage, this time only once.
* 3rd sub-stage: As you wander and find your way to h o m e, you will notice a white dodacahedron manifest in the middle of the way. Then you shall inadvertently y e e t it into oblivion. However, your hubris is your downfall. As soon as the dodacahedron is yote, it will send you to the innermost sections of the VOID. You will wander in the darkness, unsure of further actions for precisely 194 seconds.
* 4th sub-stage: A bright light will illuminate your path. As you follow the way, you will notice a high pitch in the midst of oblivion. Slowly you shall scramble up the rocks and up the rough hills, with difficultty nott exceeding 818736 in number. When you reach the pitch, a portal will apparate to you, initiating the following speech:

*"A great ritual must be performed. Step into the door, within. Do not fear, there is no protegent. CC-BY-SA 3.0 will protecc you. Meme man is informed of your actions. Do refer to Wikia: Licensing occasionally."*

* 5th sub-stage: The portall will ***S U C C*** you in, leaving no choice for you, the one in fear. Slowly you zipp through the macdonalds of time and space until a steank restaurant awaits in front of you. Gradually, a dark shadow appears and tries to consume you. You offend, but it will strike with the tetrahedron of speed. You will be damaged by 24.27640841945% of your total health. Then, CC-BY-SA will protecc you as promised. The shadow dissolves into the endless space, and you are permitted entry into the steank restaurant.
* 6th sub-stage: Upon entry, you will see an endless spiral staircase leading down to the dimension of **Y A M**. The shadow is dead, but the tetrahedron of speed ain't. It pushes you into the tunnel and you free-fall and scream for 11111 seconds. All the while, you are conscious and aware.