Actions of Treachery

### Part 1

"Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" Lieutenant Brad Tylers squealed. He turned around, hoping his superiors agreed with his enthusiasm, but received only a glare from the commanding officer.

The year was 2510, and the Federation's having joined in the waning stages of the Hyrecipian/Orion War had successfully driven back the Orions into the Uncharted Regions. With the Orion threat nearly gone from the galaxy, Star Fleet Command had ordered Minuteman Division to scout around what used to be Orion Territory, and take out any surviving Orion forces, before they could regroup and pose another threat to galactic peace.

"Status update, Commander." Fleet Captain Talmid instructed his tactical officer, Lt. Commander Dave Barker, after sufficiently glaring at one of his helm officers.

Dave cleared his throat. "The Orion Battlecruiser is severely disabled, and the two Attack Cruisers have been destroyed. No more danger here, Fleet Captain."

"Good, great, wonderful!" Talmid exclaimed. "Set a course for the next system, we've-"

"Sir! We're receiving a transmission from Star Fleet Command. It's from Admiral Green." Lt. Albert Kyle interrupted.

"-huh? Oh. Put it through." Talmid said.

The face of the aging Star Fleet Admiral Green appeared on the Talmidon's viewscreen. The entire crew except for Talmid started sweating in fear, since every smart Star Fleet officer knew the power that Admiral Green possessed, better known as the power of demotion for ignorant officers-

Admiral Green spoke. "Every Federation starship must report to Star Fleet Head Quarters for crew assignment, in summary, due to the recent Romulan Government's collapse, again, we're taking extra precautions to prevent any infiltration of our vessels. Good day!"

"That was brief." Captain Gary Vermont said with a grin.

"Yeah," Talmid said seriously. "I guess we're going to Star Fleet Command. Helm, set a course, engage."

"Aye aye, F. Captain." Brad said jokingly.

"AAAAAAAAhhhhhRRRgh!!!!!!" Talmid lunged at him. This was going to be a very long trip.

### Part 2

"Fleet Captain's log, star date, ah, whatever the star date is;

The Talmidon has successfully arrived at Star Fleet Command, more specifically Star Base E-8. Anyways, this is getting boring. End Log."

...

Talmid and Gary strolled into a room inside Star Base E-8, where they were greeted by seven Star Force Troopers and a Star Fleet Admiral.

Gary gasped, but Talmid remained his cool. "Hello Admiral Green." he said.

"Welcome, Fleet Captain," Green welcomed Talmid. "As you have probably heard by now, the government of the Romulan Star Empire is near collapse, as usual, and a portion of it has broke away to form the Imperial Romulan Regime."

Talmid shrugged. "Thanks for the news, as you can see I don't really care much for Romulan politics."

Green continued, ignoring the Fleet Captain's remark. "The Imperial Romulan Regime poses a threat to the Galactic Alliance, so in an act of caution, Star Fleet Command has ordered that Star Force troops be placed on every Federation starship, your's included."

"Star Force Soldiers?" Gary asked squeakily, slightly regaining his voice in front of the scary Admiral.

"Yes, Captain Vermont." Admiral Green replied. "Now, may I introduce to you, The 51st Division."

"Sir yes sir!" the Star Force troopers chanted.

"So, who's in charge here?" Talmid inquired.

A soldier with a red sleeve stepped forward. "I am, sir. Hector Gregory, Lieutenant, First Class. And these are my troops."

"I see?" Talmid said, not quite following.

"Nice to meet you, Lt." Gary said with a smile. Talmid grinned. Leave it to Gary for introductions like this.

...

"Ahh, isn't it nice to finally be on a starship again?" Star Force Ensign Jake asked as he flung himself onto one of the bunks in their crew quarters.

"Yeah!" his comrade, Sergeant Hank, agreed as he set his bag down. "Any idea where Sherman is?"

Hank loved, really LOVED his weapons, so he gave them names. Sherman was the name for his shiny MP-07 Bolster Rifle, complete with a rocket propelled grenade launcher.

"Sherman? I think it's around here somewhere." Jake said, rummaging around in Hank's bag. "Here she is."

"No, that's Big Bella." Hank corrected him. "You gotta be careful around Bella, there's a rumor this type of gun has a malfunction which causes them to blow in the battery compartment if you're not careful."

"Oh." Jake took his hands away from Bella quickly. "Is this Sherman?" he asked, pulling out a larger, more intimidating gun.

"That's her." Hank took the rifle and hung it up above his bunk.

### Part 3

Meanwhile, the Talmidon was en route back to Orion Territory.

Fleet Captain Talmid sat boringly at his captain's chair. This was probably one of the most boring days in his captaining a starship. Well, come on. He was just sitting there, nothing was happening, no battle going on, no-

"Fleet Captain! We're picking up a distress call from the USS Tiger Shark!" Brad Tylers shouted from his position at the helm.

Talmid was instantly awake out of his boredom. "Put it through!" he ordered.

The distress call played. "Help! We're being attacked by- \*SCREEEEEEECH!!!!!!!!!!!\*" It stopped abruptly.

"What's a screech?" Talmid asked.

Dave spoke up, "A screech is a shrill, high-pitched, harsh shriek or sound, and that's just the noun, if you want to know it as in verb-"

"Thanks Mr. Dictionary," Talmid interrupted him.

"The transmission has ended." Brad informed them.

"Obviously," Talmid said, rolling his eyes.

"What are we going to do?" Shirley asked. "They said they were under attack."

"They did? All I heard was a shrill, high pitched noise." Talmid replied.

"Why don't you go take a nap, you seem tired." Gary said.

"No! And miss all the fun? Noooooo way!" Talmid said. "Helm, set a course to the Mako Shark, engage!"

"Um, don't you mean USS Tiger Shark? There's no such ship as the Mako-" Albert started.

"Just go." Talmid instructed.

"Yes sir!" Albert Kyle input the coordinates for the TIGER Shark. "Warp speed."

"Transwarp."

"Picky picky." Brad whispered to Albert.

"I heard that." Talmid said. "Now GO!!!!!!!!!!!"

"AAAAHHH!!!!!" Albert screamed and pulled the transwarp lever.

The Talmidon disappeared in a flash of bright white light, onto its next destination.

And back at the USS Tiger Shark, a shadow loomed over the forms of fallen personnel. Confident in its actions, it let out a shrill, high pitched noise. "SCREEEEEECH!!!!!!!!!!!!"

### Part 4

The Talmidon dropped out of warp in front of a damaged Miranda Class Starship.

"Scan the ship, check for lifeforms." Talmid instructed. "Dave, Shirley, you're with me."

"I'm with you too!" a voice spoke up from behind them.

Talmid whirled around. The Star Force troopers stood there, all seven of them jammed inside one of the bridge turbolifts. Filling up what was left of the space were several huge guns, held and strapped onto one of the soldiers.

"What are you doing here?! This is my bridge! Get off!" Talmid shouted as they stepped into his bridge, trying to shove them all back into the lift.

"Star Force Troopers! Oh wow! Can I have your autographs! Commander Barker never gives me any!" Lt. Tylers exclaimed. "Pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease???"

"No no no!" Talmid shouted. "No autographs, no unauthorized people on my bridge, get off get off GET OFF!!"

"Sorry Captain Talmid, we thought we were authorized." First Lieutenant Hector said. "We'll leave."

"But can I have an autograph? Please?" Brad whined.

"NO!!!!!" Talmid roared. "Back to your station, Lieutenant! And you troops, off my bridge this instant!"

The Star Force Troopers shrugged and went back into the turbolift, while Brad sulked back to his station. "And I didn't get their autographs." he sobbed.

"AAURGH!!! Be quiet, Lieutenant!!!!" Talmid screeched.

Shirley and Gary snickered.

...

After much shouting, shoving, and screeching, Talmid, Dave, and a couple security forces beamed aboard the bridge of the USS Tiger Shark.

"Fan out. Find the crew." Talmid instructed.

The bridge was mysteriously intact, but everyone was missing. Many other parts of the ship were the same, intact and functional, just with the crew.... gone. Until when they came to the science lab,

"Fleet Captain, I think you'll want to take a look at this!" an officer shouted.

Talmid and Dave ran over to where the officer was. A non-living form lay on the ground. Its ears were pointy.

"Romulans." Dave muttered.

"heeeelp." a voice said hoarsely.

"Who said that?!" Talmid asked.

"Not me!" Dave exclaimed.

"heeeelp." the voice repeated.

"Here, behind this barrel!" an officer said. They pushed the barrel away, and lying there was a Star Fleet officer, his uniform torn and with a look of utter fear on his face.

"heeeeelp." he moaned, before falling unconscious.

Talmid slapped his combadge. "Talmidon, beam us directly to sickbay!" he ordered.

The team transported back to the Talmidon, but if they had stayed longer, they would have seen a pair of eyes staring at from in the barrel. It screeched.

### Part 5

A few hours later, in the Talmidon briefing room....

Talmid, Gary, Shirley, Dave, Albert, and Brad were seated around the table.

"This meeting now will discuss the recent incident involving the USS Tiger Lily." Talmid stated.

"Correction." Brad said. "Tiger SHARK."

Talmid glared at him. "You don't want to be a janitor, do you, ENSIGN?"

"AAAHH!! I GOT DEMOTED!!!" Brad screamed, as tears literally flew from his eyes. He blew his nose loudly into Dave's sleeve.

Talmid rolled his eyes. "Stop it, Lieutenant. There, you got your rank back."

Brad sniffled quietly, as Talmid continued. "What we don't understand is what happened. We've salvaged some of the ship's logs, and we'll play them back here."

The Fleet Captain pressed a button, and a holographic screen appeared behind him. Talmid swiveled his chair around to face the screen, which began playing one of the most recent logs.

"Captain Lillian Burnette's log, 20:36, January 2nd, 2511, standard time. We have arrived at the Murdai Nebula Cluster, and-"

Beep! Talmid pressed a button a remote that had materialized in his hand. The next log played.

"Captain's log, 11:40, January 3rd, 2511. Our tests done with gases from the Murdai Nebula Cluster have proven successful-"

Beep! Talmid skipped that log as well.

"Emergency log, 14:12, January 3rd, 2511!" the captain's voice said, sounding urgent this time. "Science lab has reported a test malfunction, repeat, test malfunction! Massive plasma leak as well! We're sending out a distress call! All crew are attempting to stop the leak- \*SCREEEEEECH!!!!!!\*"

"Oh no! The screech is back!" Talmid screamed, toppling out of his chair.

After more screeching, and a lot of screaming from the Captain of the Miranda, the log ended.

"That. Was. Scary." Talmid said, picking himself up from the floor.

A crewman barged into the room. "Sir, the guy from the Tiger Shark is awake." he informed them.

"Then let's go!" Talmid stood up, and the rest of his bridge crew did as well. They left the room for sickbay, ready to learn some more information from the sole surviving crewman from the Tiger Shark.

### Part 6

Talmid and Gary strode into sickbay. The guy they had rescued earlier from the doomified USS Tiger Shark lay in one of the beds.

"Ah, Fleet Captain Talmid," the guy welcomed them. "I have been awaiting for the time when we could get proper introductions."

Talmid cast a sidelong glance at Gary, then said to the man, "Same here. And you are?"

"I am Professor Ed Diat, head scientist of the Endless Boundaries Project." Prof. Diat explained. He chuckled. "That wouldn't exactly be true, since not only am I the head scientist of the project, but I am also the only one working on it. My colleagues deserted me."

Talmid made note of this. "You already seem to know my name, so I needn't introduce myself. Mind if I ask some questions?"

"How about I ask a question first," Ed Diat countered. "What is your last name, Fleet Captain? Or is Talmid your last name, thus what is your first name?"

Talmid shuddered. This was classified information! No way was he giving out his name to this weird Professor!

"Um, that's classified information. Very classified." Talmid replied. "Now, do you know what happened on the Tiger Shark? In case you didn't know already, the whole rest of the crew is dead in the science lab."

Talmid flipped open a small holo-player and played the log from the Tiger Shark about all crew headed for the science lab.

Prof. Diat looked at it for a second, then ignored it. "In case you're thinking that my project has something to do with that, I can assure you, I had nothing to do with it."

Judging from the previous parts of the conversation, Talmid knew that the Professor would not hesitate to make up stories, or lie. The Fleet Captain made another glance at his First Officer, signalling him that the talk was over.

"Oh, yes. One last thing. I have some unfinished business in my lab, so I must leave for the Tiger Shark immediately," Diat said.

Whatever happened, Talmid had a feeling that he did NOT want Ed Diat back on the doomed Miranda. He made up an excuse.

"Sorry, but our Star Force soldiers need to check the ship more to make sure it is safe. I hope you understand, Proffy."

Gary raised his eyebrows, but kept quiet, as Ed Diat glared at them.

Talmid and Gary left, with the former having some important research to do. Oh yes, very important research.

### Part 7

Just as Talmid had said, the Star Force troops were currently on the Miranda Class USS Tiger Shark. While the other soldiers searched the rest of the ship for anymore survivors, or a clue to what happened, Jake and Hank stood in the wrecked science lab.

"Here's that leak the captain was talking about in her log," Hank said, pointing his huge gun at a hole in the wall.

"Which one's that?" Jake asked. "Bethanie, or Bob?"

"Neither." Hank replied. "It's Big Bella."

Jake paled.

"Don't worry Jakey, she's not gonna go firing around like a mad bone-wolf." Hank assured him. "Besides, it's just a fake rumor that Big Bellas' are glitchy, for all we know-"

BANG!!!

"Ah! What was that?!" Jake whirled around, waving his phaser around to face a large barrel.

"It came from the barrel." Hank said, aiming Big Bella at the barrel.

"Hello?" Jake called at the barrel, not pointing his phaser away.

Another bang.

Hank nodded, and the two troopers slowly moved in towards the barrel.

Suddenly a loud, high pitched, shrill shrieking sound filled the air. "SCREEEEEEEEEEEECH!!"

The barrel started rocking, and more bangs and screeches sounded from inside. A green lump started to rise from it's hollow black inside.

Hank let Big Bella's firepower loose on the barrel. Holes tore through it as bullets bounced around the room. Jake fired his phaser at the green lump, causing it to fall back into the barrel. But then it came back, but with many more green lumps.

They jumped out of the barrel. Long tails and four clawed hands whipped around the room as the two troopers kept firing.

"Monkeys! They're monkeys!" Jake pointed out.

One of them reached up and yanked its claws down Jake's Star Force Uniform, ripping parts of it apart. A tail whipped around his neck, pulling him to the floor. "Hey, let go!" he choked out.

Hank was upon him instantly, grabbing monkeys and flinging them across the room. He tore the monkeys off Jake and continued blasting at them with Big Bella.

The monkeys scattered, and suddenly the room was empty except for the two bewildered soldiers.

"What was that?" Jake asked. "Those monkeys looked like zombies, with their green skin and glowing red eyes, and they sure acted crazy."

"Yes." Hank agreed grimly. "Zombie Monkeys. Crazy Zombie Monkeys."

Footsteps sounded from the adjacent room. Reinforcements were coming. But the man who stepped in through the doorway was not a Star Force Trooper.

"Hello, soldiers." the man said with a sly grin. "You may know me as Professor Ed Diat, and your worst nightmare."

### Part 8

Talmid sat in the research room, contemplating about the new information he had just learned about Professor Ed Diat’s project, the Endless Boundaries Project.

From what he had learned, the Endless Boundaries Project was an experiment involving the use of matter from the nebulas that form star systems, to create life.  Apparently, the project was headed by Professor Ed Diat, and the project was a total failure from the start.  That was why his colleagues had deserted him.

Talmid deducted that Professor Diat had managed to get aboard the USS Tiger Shark, which was a science ship under the role of collecting data on pre-star system nebulas.  Ed Diat must have chosen the Tiger Lily because of its destination, a pre-star system nebula.  And Prof. Diat’s project involved pre-star system nebula!

The Fleet Captain sat up in his chair and stretched his arms, yawning.  It had been a long night, and it was time for night shift.  That meant bed time for him.  That is, if his combadge hadn’t decided to vibrate at that moment.

Talmid slapped it.  “Yes?”

“Fleet Captain, this is security squad 12 in the transporter room.  We found the chief knocked out cold, and-”

“WHAT?!” Talmid was instantly completely awake, and he was up standing, ready for anything.  Except for the news he heard next.

“- the transporter computer shows that Professor Ed Diat has beamed onto the USS Tiger Shark.”

“WHAT?!” Talmid exclaimed again. “That is against my orders, who authorized him to leave?”

“Nobody sir, we believe he left on his own accord.  What we do not know is how he managed to leave without us knowing.”

Talmid was feeling shaky. “Check sickbay.  Now.  I’ll be down there immediately.  Oh yes, contact the Star Force Troopers.  Make sure they apprehend the professor.”

“Yes sir.  Security squad 12 out.”

Talmid breathed deeply.  This wasn’t the first time somebody defied his orders, but it just didn’t make sense.  A Federation Scientist who acts like his brain was made of plastic who goes and defies his, the captain of the starship’s, orders, must be dealt with.

He slapped his combadge. “Bridge Crew, this is Talmid.  Meet me at transporter room 4.  We’re going to the Tiger Shark.”

### Part 9

“What do you mean by, ‘Worst Nightmare’?” Hank questioned the professor suspiciously, shifting his gun.  “That sounds like you’re a bad guy, huh?  And you know what we do to bad guys.”  He aimed Big Bella at the professor.

“Hey, slow down piggy.” Prof. Diat said, prompting a growl from Hank.  “Why don’t you just go wee wee wee all the way home, and let me do what I wish, I am after all, a well known Federation Scientist.”

“Yeah, well known because of your craziness.” Jake said, aiming his phaser.  “Big Bella’s big and heavy, and there are rumors that she’s got glitches, glitches that make her shoot at will.”

Diat laughed.  “Ha ha, but I’m not Will.  That gun wont shoot at me.”

Bing!  A bullet slammed into the wall behind Diat.

“That was just a warning, Proffy.  Now raise your hands.”  Hank ordered gruffly.

“Oh, I’ve got my own warnings.  And I’ve made them already.” Ed said coolly.  “So now you will suffer the consequences.”

The professor pulled out thing with a large red button.  He pressed it.

Lightning shot out of the thing and connected with the two Star Force troopers.  Hank and Jake screamed, falling to the ground.

“You see?  And even better, all your electronic devices have been disabled.  No calling for reinforcements for you.” Ed said as he stepped towards them, drawing a disruptor.

Hank stood up slowly. “Oh, but Big Bella aint an electronic device.”  He pulled up his huge gun and ran towards the professor, firing loud rounds of bullets at Diat.

The professor jumped out of the way behind a large coolant tank.  Bullets pinged off it, and Prof. Diat returned fire with his disruptor.  Jake ran out of the room, screaming, “Help!  Help!  Mad scientist!  Heeeeeeeeeelp!”

Jake ran into an adjacent room and found the rest of the soldiers lying on the ground, unmoving.  The ensign couldn’t tell if they were unconscious, or dead.

Suddenly a transporter whirring sound came from behind him.  He turned, and saw Fleet Captain Talmid, Captain Gary Vermont, Commander Shirley Brickfalling, Lt. Commander Dave Barker, Lt. Albert Kyle, and Janitor - I mean, Lieutenant - Brad Tylers as well as a squad of security forces from the Talmidon appear.

“Move out, find the professor and capture him.  Use any force necessary.” Talmid instructed.

“I know where he is.” Jake said to them.  “Hurry, follow me!  Quick!”

### Part 10

“Stop in the name of the Federation!” Dave screamed as he barrelled into the science lab of the Tiger Shark.

“Oh, sorry.  The Federation has no meaning to me.” a voice said.  A second later, Professor Ed Diat tore out from his hiding place towards a turbolift, firing disruptor blasts as he went.

“Get ‘im!” Dave shouted, and he and the security forces tore after the fugitive.  The room was empty except for Hank, Jake, and the rest of the Talmidon bridge crew.

Then the Star Force troopers who were knocked out before came in.

“What happened?” Lt. Hector said groggily, rubbing his head.

“The Proffy’s gone bad.” Talmid informed him.  “I had doubts of him from the first place.”

SCREEEEEEEEEEEECH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“Ahg, not that again!” Talmid groaned.

“Behind you!” Albert Kyle screamed, and aimed his phaser behind Talmid.  The Fleet Captain ducked, and a green monkey which long claws, a swinging tail, and glowing red eyes jumped over him into Kyle’s phaser blast.

Talmid spun around and stood in a defensive position, then stared at the green monkey thing lying on the ground in front of him.  “What’s this?” he asked, kicking it with his boot.

“Zombie monkey, as Hank and I call them.” Jake said. “A dozen of them attacked us earlier.”

“You mean, there are still eleven more out there?” Brad asked.

“Approximately.” Jake replied, shrugging. “They ran off, so we’d better take ‘em out.”

“Okay then.” Talmid said. “Gary, Brad, you’re with me.  We’ll check out the surrounding areas.  Shirley, Albert, you search deck one.  Feel free to smash any zombie monkeys you find.  And you,” he said, pointing at the previously unconscious Star Force troops, “will search deck two.”

Jake spoke up. “I’d like to go with Commander Brickfalling.”

“So be it, Ensign.” Talmid said. “Good luck, you’re going to need it.”

“Thank you sir.” Jake said, and he went off with Shirley and Albert.

Hank went off with the other Star Force troops, leaving Gary, Brad, and Talmid alone in the deserted science bay.

Gary glanced at Talmid. “You don’t like Shirley much, do you, Fleet Captain?”

Talmid shrugged. “I can’t say she’s my favorite person,”

“I think she’s okay.” Gary said a little to quickly, as if he was aching to let his feelings out.  Very classified feelings.

Talmid raised his eyebrows, but didn’t say anything.  However, he was very tempted to say, “You must really LIKE her, as in really really LIKE-”

A loud screeching sound interrupted his thoughts, and in an instant later he heard a muffled screaming sound come from Lt. Tylers.

### Part 11

Talmid and Gary turned towards Brad and opened fire with their phasers at the Zombie Monkey tearing at Brad’s clothes.

Steam rose from the Zombie Monkey as it tipped over and fell.

“Are you alright Lieutenant?” Gary asked, helping Brad to his feet.

“I’m fine,” Brad replied, dusting himself off.  “My clothes are ripped now.”

“Yeah, but we have to keep moving.” Talmid said.  No sooner had they stepped into the next room when Talmid’s combadge jingled.

“Yes?”

“Sir, we have lost sight of the target.” the security officer guy said.  “However, we checked out the computer logs and we have found that a shuttle is missing from the hanger.”

“He must have taken it.” Talmid said.  He contacted the Talmidon’s hanger crew.  “Talmidon, this is Fleet Captain Talmid.  Be on the lookout for stray shuttles.  Also, scatter some fighters as well, tell them to fire on any enemy target, including that shuttle.”

“Yes sir.”

Suddenly the Star Force Troopers burst into the room.

“What now?” Talmid snapped.

“It’s Sergeant Feetie,” one of them gasped out.

“Sergeant ‘Feetie’?” Talmid asked, raising his eyebrows.

“Yes, Sergeant Judd Feetie.” the soldier, identified as Lt. Gus Brown panted.  “We just noticed he’s missing.”

“We’ve managed to track him,” Lt. Hector said. “But we can’t make any sense of it.  His coordinates are that of someplace OUTSIDE the ship.”

“Uh oh.” Talmid said. “Prof. Ed Diat just escaped in a shuttle, OUTSIDE the ship.”

Hank paled. “He must have taken him prisoner!  What an i-”

Talmid interrupted him and contacted the Talmidon Hanger Crew again. “Belay that order!  The shuttle is carrying a hostage, repeat, carrying a hostage!  Fire to disable, not destroy!”

“We’re carrying the message on to the fighters.  Stand by.” the guy on the other end replied. “Message reached.  Pilots notified.”

“Good.  Talmid out.” Talmid closed the transmission.  “The fighters are notified.”

### Part 12

Sergeant Judd Feetie awoke inside a shuttlecraft.  He tried to move, but found himself gagged and bound to a metal pole.  He managed to turn his head, and saw a guy enter the shuttle into warp.  The guy turned, and Feetie recognized him as the bricky scientist that had been rescued from the Tiger Shark.

He also recognized him as the bricky scientist who had knocked him unconscious.

Prof. Ed Diat smiled an evil smirk at him, and moved to take out Judd’s gag, but he stopped a second before doing it.  “Hey, Star Forcer.” Diat said maniacally.

This guy’s crazy! Feetie thought.

“Well, I have the power to create a whole new world,” Diat was saying.  “In the process of doing so, I will have to wipe out everything else in the process.  Mwa ha ha ha ha!”

Really crazy.  Feetie thought.

“But I was thinking, that maybe I would share it with someone.” the scientist said. “And that person is you.”  He removed Feetie’s gag.

Feetie spat on him, but the crazed scientist just wiped it off.

“Why should I want to rule the world?” Feetie spat.  Prof. Diat untied the ropes holding him to the pole, and as soon as he could move his feet, Feetie kicked the professor.

“Should I say ouch?” Diat asked, not the least bit hurt, before clicking his tongue. “I think you’ll have to spend some time with what I have so far.”

Feetie turned, and saw something that made him feel cold.  A green monkey stood in the hallway leading to the sleeping quarters, and farther down the hall, more monkeys climbed around.  They all turned to look at him, then screeched.  “SCREEEEEEEEECH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

“AAAAAH!!!” Feetie screamed, but Diat kicked him down the hall.  He flew into the sleeping quarters, and before he knew it, the door had slid shut and locked.

A monkey jumped up onto the bed he was lying on, and started making all sorts of high pitched noises.  Feetie fainted.

### Part 13

Talmid banged his fist against the table, angry.

And no one likes it went Talmid is mad.

"Well crew, we've lost Prof. Ed Diat.  Again.  Any questions?" Talmid asked his crew, who sat with him around the table in the briefing room.

Brad raised his hand.  "I have a suggestion." he said.

"Shoot." replied Talmid.

"Shoot?" Albert whispered to Shirley. "What's that mean?"

"Apparently you're not knowledgeable in 21st Century slang." Shirley replied.

Albert shrugged, while Brad gave his suggestion.  "We could notify every Federation base and planet to be on the lookout for a Talmidon Shuttle, as well as alert our allies such as the PCG to what is going on."

Talmid rolled his eyes.  "Like I didn't already do that?"

"Grouch." Albert quipped.

Talmid threw his mug at him.  Albert ducked, and the mug smashed into the impenetrable glass windows, where it broke into a million pieces which fell to the floor, along with a full mug's worth of coffee.

Gary shook his head.  "Seriously, Fleet Captain.  It was a week ago that I told you to quit on caffeine."

"And it was 6 days ago I decided to ignore you." Talmid snapped, as he stood up to get another Expresso from the replicator.

Gary looked at his feet.

"Ahem," Dave cleared his throat. "As chief tactical officer of this starship, I suggest that we maintain a yellow alert, and I suggest all other starships in the nearby vicinity do the same."

Talmid stared at him.  "Commander, our shuttles are equipped with transwarp drives.  Ships at transwarp for this time would be nearly out of the Alpha Quadrant by now.  Remember that."

"They also use up a lot of anti-matter, which shuttles don't have a large supply of." Brad pointed out.

"Which means it could be halfway across the Beta Quadrant instead." Talmid replied coldly, and sipped his coffee.  "Aurgh!  Too hot!" he chucked it at the window, where it broke to a million pieces too.

Gary, Shirley, Dave, Brad, and Albert exchanged glances, the same thought on every single one of their minds: He's crazy.

### Part 14

Talmid sat in his extremely comfy captain's chair on the bridge, asleep.  He would have continued sleeping for the whole trip when suddenly the ship was jerked out of Transwarp.  Albert swiveled his chair around to offer an explanation.

"Aahhh, what??" Talmid yelped as he tumbled out of his chair.  Shirley and Gary, who wore the special safety belts that were made mandatory for every star fleet vessel some 150 years ago, exchanged glances.

Albert sighed. "Sir, we have picked up a distress call coming from the planet Umbra III, from a PCG Star Quest base there." the Lieutenant informed him.

Talmid grunted.  "Play it through."

Brad spoke up. "Uh, sir.  Not all distress calls come with explanations.  And this one is 6 hours old.  I'm surprised no one has picked it up yet."

Talmid groaned.  "I'm getting too old for this...." he mumbled.  Gary shook his head.  Shirley facepalmed, and Dave sighed.

...

A few minutes later, Talmid, who had decided to join the team that would investigate the distress call for no reason whatsoever, and two other Star Fleet-ers, a guy and a girl, were transported onto the previously war-ridden planet.  (if you're knowledgeable in the events of the Yor War, you know what I'm talking about)

"This is one sad planet," Ensign Meghan grimaced as she stared at the burnt old husks of trees and the bullet-ridden mountain sides.  A plasma storm raged on some several miles south.

"More like piece of junky rock," Ensign Jimmy Smirk corrected her. "There's nothing alive here."

The irony, since in fact there was no one alive down here near the plasma storm except for Talmid, Meghan, and Jimmy.  A live-sign scan done by the Talmidon had shown the PCG Base to be empty of life.  Talmid didn't think of talking about it.

The Fleet Captain grunted as he stepped through some underbrush.  A five legged animal lay unmoving on the ground ahead of him.

"Lroghhtyhhk," Talmid said, nudging it with his foot.  Meghan began hovering over it with a tricorder.

"It died from Plasma Exposure." she informed them.

"All things that are native to Umbra III are alergic to Plasma.  It's deadly to them." Talmid replied, stepping over the Lyythrwhatever.

Soon they came upon the base itself.  It was overgrown, with a few scattered tents and machinery lying around it.  Talmid ran up to a form lying in the ground, and sucked in his breath when he realized it had been a Star Quest Ensign.

"He's dead," Talmid said grimly. "They all are." he added staring at the rest of the bodies strewn across the ground.

And then there was the screech.

### Part 15

Talmid gripped his phaser and set it to 'kill' in response to the screech.  He knew that screech.  It mean monkeys.  Green monkeys.  With glowing red eyes.  Rabid Zombie Monkeys.

Instead, a Star Force Trooper stepped out of the bushes.

"What?" Talmid exclaimed incredulously.  By the Rank band he wore over the right side of his chest, Talmid could tell he was a Sergeant.  The Sergeant wore a satchel and a Kepi Hat, and he carried a phaser as well, which was aimed at the Fleet Captain we know.

"What's going on?" Ensign Jimmy asked, when he noticed the rogue Star Force trooper.  "Hey, I know you.  You're Sergeant Judd Feetie."

"Judd?? Feetie?? Who in their right mind has a name like THAT??" Talmid gaped. "Wait, your name is familiar-"

Judd Feetie stepped forward closer. "Yes, I am Sergeant Judd Feetie.  Allow me to introduce my new boss, Professor Ediot." he drawled.

Talmid's jaw dropped lower, when Professor Ed Diat stepped into view.

"It's ED DIAT, you fool of a Feetie." Prof. Diat mocked.  He tossed a wad of Latinum at Feetie, who caught them with his free hand. "Another thousand for your show."

Talmid facepalmed. "Great, so the missing Star Force dude goes bad."

Feetie glared at him, before asking Boss Diat, "Boss, for another thousand, can I end the pitiful life of ol' Fleet Captain here?"

"Go ahead, Feetie." Diat said, rubbing his hands together in glee.

Talmid wasted no time.  Phaser beams emitted from both his and Ensign Jimmy's phasers, each one hitting their target smack in the arm.

"Owwwwww!!!!" Feetie moaned, dropping to his knees while clutching his arm.  His phaser dropped, and Diat picked it up.

"You fool, Feetie." he scolded, before pocketing the phaser and pulling out a disrupter.

A firefight ensued.  Talmid and Jimmy were the only ones with phasers, while Meghan hid behind a tree.  Grumbling, Talmid pulled out a mini shotgun and chucked it at Meghan, while Jimmy stared wide eyed at his captain.  Shotguns were illegal according to Federation Firearms Law 18 section B3.

"Fleet Captain-" Jimmy gasped.

Part 15.5 ===

Talmid waved his hand at him. "Keep firing." He aimed his phaser and blew up a boulder next to the one Diat and Feetie were cowering behind. "Lets move in, interception triangle formation."

Talmid dove to the left, missing two disruptor blasts which exploded his previous cover. Jimmy and Meghan sneaked around to the right, and soon they were on opposite sides of the bad guy's boulder. Talmid peeked out from behind a tree and saw Diat looking around for him. In a flash Talmid had jumped on Diat, trying to wrestle the disruptor from the mad scientist's hands. He wasn't expecting Feetie to dump a rock on his head.

"Ooch..." Talmid groaned before toppling off Diat's back. Then suddenly a phaser blast blew a hole in the ground between both baddies. Jimmy and Meghan stood there, their weapons trained on the two bad guys.

"Don't move." Jimmy said in as serious a tone he could muster.

Talmid mumbled something unintelligible that sounded like "oomfpa shackolacka" before opening his eyes. He saw Feetie widen his eyes in terror, but he also saw Prof. Ed Diat reaching behind his back to reach his disruptor, in a way that his Ensign's wouldn't notice.

"Uh oh," Talmid murmured, as Diat suddenly pulled out his disruptor and fired.

Someone screamed.

Talmid kicked out and sent Diat tumbling head over heels. Then he jumped on Feetie and gave him a good smack that would leave him unconscious for a looooong time. The Fleet Captain grabbed his fallen phaser, and blasted the beam right at the sprawled Diat. Talmid noted with dismay that in the struggle his phaser had set itself to "stun".

He looked up, and found Jimmy holding an unconscious Ensign Meghan in his arms. "Oh nooooo....." Jimmy was wailing. Talmid's shoulders drooped. He slapped his combadge.

"Talmidon, this is Talmid." he said. No response. "Hello? Chief? Gary? Dave? Shirley?? ANYBODY??? HELLOOOOOO????"

It must be the plasma storm, Talmid thought, staring up at the storm clouds blanketing the sky.

"There's only one way out of here," Talmid said finally. "We're flying."

Then a Zombie Monkey jumped on the Fleet Captain's head. Talmid tore it off and blew it up with his phaser, which was still set to stun. Then a whole pack of monkeys appeared from the forest.

Screaming, Talmid and Jimmy who was carrying Meghan ran into the open hanger bay of the PCG Base. The first two planes they saw were two old experimental "Flying Pancakes". Talmid got into one, and Jimmy dragged Meghan into the other one, before climbing in as well. They took off.

### Part 16

“I hate flying pancakes!!!” Talmid screamed as his Vought V-173 “Flying Pancake” did a barrel roll and then aimed itself at a mountain.  Talmid gripped the steering wheel which a bored PCG mechanic had installed and tried turning it, but only succeeded in getting the Pancake to rotate left or right.  Then he realized his foot was on a weird pedal.  He kicked it, and then the plane was flying up into the sky.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhHHHHHHhhhhhhhHHH!!!!” he screamed more as the plane blasted up higher, spinning all the way.  He kicked another pedal which caused the uncontrollable pancake to do more uncontrollable loop da loops and barrel rolls.  His hand found its way to a lever behind the steering wheel.  Talmid pushed it forwards, and then the Pancake rocketed forward at such a speed the drag collecting wheel pylons snapped off and fell to the ground far below.

Talmid tried turning the lever the other way, but accidentally caused the plane to go to an even faster speed: Warp.

Bad mistake.  The pancake erupted in a ball of fuzz as it passed the sonic barrier, and then it tumbled down to the ground.  It was still level, so it created a lot of drag which slowed down its descent just barely enough to not kill the Fleet Captain when it smashed into a boulder.

A boulder next to an unconscious Professor and Sergeant.

And an unconscious Talmid.

…

Ensign Jimmy Smirk was a pretty good pilot, but this was one terrible plane.  After two hours of getting the controls just right, he managed to get it to fly at a safe enough speed through space all the way to the nearest allied planet, a captured Yor planet under control of the Martian Empire.

They had also made it quiet clear that flying pancakes were not welcome on their planet.  However, once they discovered his allegiance, they turned nicer.

“Seriously Martian dudes, I need to see a doctor NOW!!” Jimmy shouted to the Martian who wore a blue rank band, obviously a Martian of a higher level.

“You don’t look too sick to me,” the Martian remarked, staring at the perfectly healthy human.

“No, not for me, for my friend.  She’s injured.” Jimmy pleaded.

The Martian sighed.  “Then where is she?”

“Here.” Jimmy carried the still unconscious Ensign Meghan out of the cockpit of his flying pancake which he had managed to crash land into a Martian Amusement Park, right on top of a pizza stand.

The Martian stared at the two humans.  “Okay then.” he said, pulling out a walkie talkie. “This is Gorghib, I’m at the pizza stand.  Ambulance please.”  He paused for a second, then said, “Yes, I’m inviting them for a pizza party.”

Jimmy gawked at him. “Are you insane???  That’s not why-”

Gorghib glared. “How else will they get here?” he snapped, before sitting down to eat a pizza.�

### Part 17

After the hassle of escaping from the confines of a Flying Pancake, explaining who he was to a naive Captain Cake of the USS Reputable (the Sovereign Class), rescuing the other Flying Pancake with his crew in it, and getting back to the Talmidon, a grouchy Fleet Captain Talmid went to his ready room to calm down.

The second after closing the door and slumping in his chair, the doorbell rang.

"Come in," Talmid grumbled.

Gary stepped inside. "Sir, we are receiving a priority red transmission from Star Fleet Command. All starships heavy cruiser and higher within 50 Light Years of the Therra system are ordered to rendezvous there to counter a highly probable Borg incursion."

Talmid raised his eyebrows. "How close are we?"

"45 Light Years." Gary told him.

"Then move us 6 Light Years away from Therra; we're not going to the fleet." Talmid stood up and made his way to the door. "We're going to Umbra III."

"What-" Gary stammered. "Fleet Captain-"

"My intentions are final, we're going to Umbra III. Prepare Star Force fighter wings, mechanized divisions, and troops for landing."

"But-"

Talmid gave Gary a glare which cut off his sentence like a phaser through butter. The conversation was over. They were going to Umbra III.                                 �

### Part 18

Following a ground search of Umbra III as well as repetitive scans of the surface from space, no life forms in the equatorial area turned up. Professor Ed Diat and Feetie were off sensors again.

Back at the meeting room after failing to find the fugitives, Talmid and crew were discussing their next course of action.

"Let's just put Mr. Diat's face up around the Galaxy's Most Wanted list and go fight some Borg." Brad complained. "This system gives me the creeps."

"And scramble some long range fighters too," Gary added.

"Fighters yes," Talmid said. "Go fight some Borg, not yet."

"What? Why?" Brad shrieked.

"YOU DARE QUESTION ME?!" Talmid roared. Brad slouched into his chair.

"Sir, the Talmidon is a Type 8 Battleship." Dave pointed out. "There aren't all that many starships that surpass it in firepower and armor. How 'bout we call over a nearby cruiser to take over search operations while we go do our duty at Therra?"

Talmid sighed. As unhappy as he was to not be chasing after Ed Diat personally, Dave's modifications to Lt. Tyler's silliness did make sense.

Pressing a button on the table's control panel, Talmid brought up a holographic display screen of the nearby star systems and all starships within. "The UFS Canis Major and the USS Capital are closest to our location." he said.

"'UFS'?" Albert questioned. "Isn't that the short-lived registry for all starships made during 2486 - 2488?"

"Yeah." Talmid replied.

"The Canis Major is a Battleship." Dave stated. "What's it doing out here? Shouldn't it be at Therra too?"

"Naw, maybe they're going rogue like that." Talmid rolled his eyes.

"TRAITOR!!!!" Gary, Shirley, Dave, Brad, and Albert all screamed, standing up and tipping their chairs over with their fingers pointing holes at Talmid.

Talmid facepalmed.                                 �

### Part 19

After hailing the UFS Canis Major which agreed to guard the system and watch for incoming and outgoing starships, Brad Tylers maneuvered the Talmidon into position for the transwarp jump to Therra.

"Engage," Talmid ordered, and Brad slammed the transwarp lever into position.

Then the lights dimmed and flickered, and a loud groaning sound filled the room as the unstable transwarp bubble failed to encompass the whole ship. Then backup power kicked in, and the Talmidon made the jump into Transwarp.

"Now what the bricking heck just happened?" Talmid demanded, once the lights were back on.

"The main problem is from engineering, sir." Albert Kyle said, peering at the data on his console. "We're low on dilithium, and both the transwarp drive and primary power are competing for more."

Brad shook his head. "That messy transwarp jump we just did exhausted almost all of our dilithium. We're running on backup power."

Talmid groaned. "When was the last time we refueled our dilithium?"

"20 years ago....?" Dave commented.

"Wow." Talmid grumbled. "That's horrible fuel economy."

"Hey, 20 years are a long time!" Shirley interrupted.

"Where are you from, the 21st Century? 20 years is short." Talmid retorted. "The fuel economy of an average Galaxy Class these days is 50 years without refueling."

Shirley pouted.

"What dilithium-eating systems do we use the most that can be disabled to reserve power?" Gary inquired, looking around.

"The warp core," Talmid stated. "It's always online but we never use it, Transwarp is so much faster."

Gary stared at his commanding officer like he was crazy. "How about this be the last time we use Transwarp? Standard warp cores are more economic-"

"But they're SLOW!" Talmid whined.

Dave intervened. "Um, right now we're making the Transwarp equivalent of Warp 7 because we're trying to reserve power. I suggest we switch to the Warp core and shut off the Transwarp drive."

"Oh, fine." Talmid muttered.

The maneuver would prove more economic in the long run, but dropping out of Transwarp, turning on the Warp core, and shutting off the Transwarp core cost a LOT of dilithium. It was hardly worth it, yet.                                 �

### Part 20

With a terrible grating sound, the Talmidon yanked itself out of warp, sending the crew flying all over the place.

Talmid picked himself off the floor and sat back in his chair. "Status report."

Albert tapped on his console and stated, "There are no Borg in the immediate area and multiple Federation warp signatures are appearing around us."

"On screen." Talmid ordered.

The viewscreen showed no Borg, and lots of Star Fleet ships jumping to warp around them.

"The USS Legacy is hailing us, sir." Dave said.

"On audio." Talmid answered.

"Greetings, Fleet Captain. The Borg have been taken care of and we are on our way out." the Legacy's captain said. "You just missed the epic fireworks display as the last Cube was destroyed."

"Waaaa, I wanted to see fireworks!" Brad cried.

"Close the channel." Talmid said, as the Legacy jumped into warp and the system became empty of all ships other than the Talmidon. "There's nothing for us here, let's go back to Umbra."

Albert began turning the ship around when suddenly there was a bright flash from behind them, and fifteen Borg Cubes exited Transwarp. All fired tractor and cutting beams into the Talmidon.

"AH WHAT IS HAPPENING!" Talmid screamed.

"Borg ambush!" Dave shouted. "They're attacking from behind!"

Talmid quickly got his composure back and began issuing commands. "Fire all rear facing torpedo launchers and get us turned around!"

"Firing Transphasic Torpedoes!" Dave complied and began firing at the Borg.

"The tractor beams are holding us steady, we can't move!" Brad screamed.

"Target their tractor beam emitters, fire phasers!" Talmid instructed.

Phasers lanced from the Talmidon's phaser strips and struck out at the Borg Cubes, but doing little damage.

"They must have adapted from the previous Borg attack." Talmid grumbled. Then the Borg began firing more cutting beams. "Great, we made them angry!"

A cutting beam struck the shields right above the bridge, lighting up room, but not breaking the shields.

"Let's do this the old way." Talmid decided. "Began modulating phaser frequencies and STOP THOSE STUPID TRACTOR BEAMS!!!"

The phasers began striking the Borg again, but this time they actually began searing through their armor and hitting the tractor beam emitters themselves, which exploded in nice little pops like popcorn.

"We're free!" Brad whooped.

"TURN US AROUND AND FIRE EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!" Talmid yelled, and Albert spun the ship around 180 degrees to face the Borg Cubes with all its forward facing weapons.

Which opened fire.                                 �

### Part 21

"FIRE EVERYTHING!!!!" Talmid screamed.

Dave punched every button that said "Fire" at his tactical station so much they popped out of their sockets, but the result was all forward torpedo launchers firing, all phaser strips firing, the Borg-B-Gone cannons firing, the Protonic Cannon firing, the Pulverization Cannons firing, and pretty much EVERYTHING firing.

In the onslaught, three Borg Cubes exploded, five were severely damaged, and the remaining seven began moving erratically in their futile attempt to resist the Talmidon's weapons fire and escape.

"Continue firing!" Talmid ordered as the Borg began powering up their engines.

"I can't, all the fire buttons are knocked out." Dave answered.

"Then transfer firing controls to helm station." Talmid said, working around the problem. "Now hail all the Borg Cubs."

"What?!" Dave exclaimed.

"Just do it." Talmid said, crossing his legs and sitting back in his chair.

Surprisingly, the Borg Cubes answered and seven pictures of the inside of a Borg Cube were transmitted onto the Talmidon's viewscreen.

"We are the Borg," all seven Cubes began to chant. "Surrender or you will be punished."

Talmid laughed, and then jeered, "This is the USS Talmidon of Star Fleet and the United Federation of Planets. You are at our mercy, and unless you lower your shields and surrender your ships, we will destroy you."

"Resistance is futile." the Borg responded.

Talmid gave a loud sigh. "Dave, can you transmit a jamming signal to the Borg Cubes? Maybe it'll 'clear their minds', make them think 'individually' for once...."

Dave raised his eyebrows, and as he got to work everyone on the bridge gawked at their Fleet Captain, who shrugged.

"What can I say? Revenge? Or liberation of them from their hive mind?" Talmid said.

"Jammer ready." Dave said.

"Well then, let's-" Talmid started.

Then all the not-destroyed Borg Cubes jumped to Transwarp and were gone.

"Oh whatever, let's go back to Umbra III." Talmid concluded. "Check on the UFS Canis Major."

### Part 22

After jolting its way through warp back to Umbra III, the Talmidon was parked in space alongside the UFS Canis Major with its systems on reserve power, when suddenly a bright flash of light from just beyond the planet lit up both ships.

"Report," Talmid instructed.

"Sensors indicate that a starship just entered.... whoa, you're going to not like this Fleet Captain." Brad stated. "That ship just entered a quantum slipstream."

Talmid's eyebrows shot up. "How large was the ship?"

"I'm not sure, sir. It must have had a cloaking device engaged, because we didn't pick it up before it launched into the slipstream." Brad explained. "I could try and analyze the entrance at the time of launch."

"Jump to it - Dave, contact the Canis Major." Talmid said.

"They're already prepared to pursue." Dave replied.

"Alright then, we'll wait here." Talmid concluded as the Canis Major jumped to transwarp. "Because we're out of fuel." he added quietly.

The bridge was quiet except for Brad's station as he worked on analyzing the slipstream when suddenly Dave's console starting beeping. "Something's happening on the planet!" Dave exclaimed.

"On screen!" Talmid ordered, and then everyone on the bridge watched in dismay as a huge disguised door on the surface of a valley slid open, and a large missile shaped warhead began to slowly rise from it.

Shirley gulped. "What is that?"

"I've finished analyzing the slipstream!" Brad announced. "The vessel that entered the quantum slipstream was of the same size of that weird thing that looks like a nuclear missile that's coming out of the planet." he said.

"You said it looked like a nuclear missile," Gary said slowly. "But who said it isn't a nuclear missile?"

"And who says the thing that entered quantum slipstream wasn't a nuclear missile?!" Albert shrieked.

Talmid rolled his eyes. "Nuclear missiles are old and outdated. The most they can do to a 26th Century starship is disable its shields."

"What about a planet?" Shirley squeaked.

"Planetary defense guns can blow up even a cruiser before it reaches the surface." Talmid yawned.

"THEN WHAT IT IS?!" Albert screamed. "ONE IS GOING SOMEPLACE AND THE OTHER IS HEADED TOWARDS US!!"

Indeed the missile thing they had witnessed rising from the planet appeared to be headed straight for the Talmidon.

DUN DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN.                                 �

### Part 23

The bridge was in chaos as all of sudden for no apparent reason at this current sentence, all the lights dimmed and the ship's computer announced, "Primary Auxiliary power down to 5%. Weapons systems, warp engines, sublight thrusters, viewscreen, non-engineering consoles, and non-bridge consoles are now offline." There you have it.

"Overridden." Talmid interjected. "Turn the sublight thrusters back online."

"Sublight thrusters back online." the computer agreed. Then it brought its evil side out again and said, "Primary Auxiliary Power down to 3%."

It seemed everyone except for Talmid (and Dave the superserious tactical officer) was in a panic when Talmid got out of his facepalm and shouted, "NOW EVERYBODY BE QUIET NAOW. I want you all to listen to me and follow my orders \*quietly\*.

"Ahem, Lt. Tylers, put the ship into reverse drive on sublight thrusters, we're evading that nuclear-missile-whatever-it-is the old fashioned way. Dave, I want you to keep track of that warhead's course and let us know when we're clear of it. And Lt. Kyle, scan the interior of the warhead." Talmid ordered in a fleet captainly way.

Silently, Brad put the ship into reverse and it began moving backwards very slooooowly. At the same time, Albert was waiting for a readout on the interior construction of the missile, which also at the same time was coming closer and closer to the Talmidon.

Dave spoke up. "The missile is remaining on its original course."

"That's music to my ears," Talmid breathed. "But we haven't cleared it yet, have we?"

"Nope," Dave said, "but we're getting there."

Ten tense seconds later, Dave announced, "We're clear!" and at the same time the computer stated, "Primary Auxiliary Power is now offline." and the engines shut off.

There was silence for several seconds, until Dave announced, "The warhead is clear."

Then all the lights turned back on and the computer chirped, "Backup Auxiliary Power is now online."

Talmid facepalmed, while Gary said, amused, "There's such a thing?"

"COMPUTER." Talmid raged. "WHY YOU NO TURN ON BACKUP AUXILIARY POWER TWENTY SECONDS AGO." He stood up from his chair and stormed into his ready room.

"Are weapons back online?" Gary asked.

"Most certainly." Dave told him.

"Alright then, fire an antimatter torpedo on an intercept course with the missile." Gary instructed. "On screen."

As the bridge crew minus Talmid watched, the torpedo impacted with the missile and then with the tiny, minute flash that all antimatter torpedoes give off in destruction, both objects disappeared.

"ITZ A FAKE!!!!!!"                                 �

### Chapter 24

"A fake? What do you mean by a fake?" Talmid demanded.

The crew was back in the meeting room, which was unworldly dark and dim and gloomy as the Backup Auxiliary Power began to drain.

"Exactly like I said," Dave repeated. "The warhead that was shot towards us from the planet was a fake. A dud. Kaput."

Talmid groaned. "Well there's still another one out there, and for all we know it ISN'T a fake. Have we received ANY word from the Canis Major yet?"

"Negative, sir." Dave concluded, and stood up to return to the bridge.

"Sit down." Talmid ordered, and Dave obediently came back. "We need to execute a plan, and perpetually lucky for us all, I've already formulated one.

"Send a message to the Canis Major ordering them to see to it that the warhead they are pursuing is COMPLETELY and UTTERLY destroyed IMMEDIATELY. Now you may go, Dave."

"Thank you, sir." Dave left.

"Next!" Talmid continued, "I've analyzed the situation in engineering and I have determined that we lack sufficient dilithium storage to make it to even the nearest refueling station."

"We're sitting ducks." Shirley said.

"NO." Talmid very forcefully said, causing everyone still present to jump. "WE are not sitting ducks, because WE are getting out of here. We are going down to the planet to mine some dilithium."

"Oh."

"How?" Gary asked.

Talmid sighed. "I was hoping you wouldn't ask me that, because I don't know."

Before anyone one else could object, Talmid screamed, "BUT WE ARE STILL GOING AND THAT IS THAT."

### Chapter 25

The platoon of MTR-01 and MTR-03 Sunrise and Horizon walker mechs respectively easily made their way over the rough terrain of Umbra III.

"Here we are!" Talmid yelled to the rest of the platoon, parking his Horizon and jumping out. He happily threw his helmet off his head and into some bushes, letting his hair fly free.

"No need to shout, Cap'n!" Commander Samson, replacement for Lieutenant Hector Gregory while he was in sick bay, shouted back, exiting his own walker. "We're wearing headsets, I think you just blew my eardrums!"

The man \*looked\* for the most part like he could take on the original Samson, or at least play as him in a school play, no heresy intended. The Star Force Commander was all muscle, but Talmid took know notice as he sauntered over to him with a scowl on his face.

"Now listen right up here Commander," Talmid growled. "I expect this to be the ONLY time I ever need to set you straight on this, got it?"

Samson puffed up his chest in pride, staring down at the commanding officer of the battleship his Star Force squadron was based on. "And that would be?"

"It's FLEET CAPTAIN TALMID, NOT CAPTAIN TALMID!!!" Talmid screamed.

The unusualness of the outburst was enough to send even Commander Samson reeling from shock, as Fleet Captain Talmid stomped away. Commander Shirley Brickfalling stepped over to him, and pointing her chin in Talmid's direction, casually advised, "Don't make him angry."

\* \* \* \* \*

The PCG base was, like last time, deserted because of the plasma storm, which also defeated the use of transporters, assuming the Talmidon could muster up enough power to even bring them online.

"Aha, here we REALLY are." Talmid said with a grin, opening a door at the end of a corridor and revealing a large storage bay of Dilithium barrels. "Bring in the trawler."

A long Star Force all terrain vehicle separated into connectable cars winded its way through the halls and joined Talmid at the storage bay. "Reporting for duty, Fleet Captain." Albert Kyle affirmed.

"Good, get this Dilithium outta here naow!" Talmid ordered.

"Yes sir!" Kyle and a bunch of Star Force personnel who had been riding on the multi-segment vehicle jumped out and started loading it with the Dilithium barrels.

A gunshot halted their progress.

Instantly, Talmid, Kyle, and all the Star Force soldiers whipped out their phasers, the solders' larger guns' laser targets probing the dark room for whoever had fired the gunshot.

And then, "SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEECH!"

"Oh popsicles, not again!" Star Force Ensign Jake lamented.

DUN DUN DUN DUUUUUN.                                 �

### Chapter 26

Rabid Zombie Monkeys poured onto the group from all sides. Phaser fire filled the room as Star Force soldiers proceeded to open fire on the little green monsters. No one noticed when another Star Force soldier wearing a brown hand bag and sporting a goofy mustache ran out of the shadows and took positions next to the other Star Force soldiers.

Well, except Ensign Jake.

"Hey look, it's Feetie!" the Ensign hollered, and instantly all phaser fire stopped as every Star Force soldier ceased firing and swung around to aim their laser points at Sergeant Judd Feetie.

Talmid stepped over to him. "Where in the universe have you been Feetie?!" he yelled angrily.

"With meeeeeeeeeee!" another voice called out.

All the laser pointers turned away from Feetie and at the source of the another voice, a man standing up on a balcony surrounded by Rabid Zombie Monkeys.

Professor Ed Diat himself, casually leaning on the railing like a casual professor would.

"Surrender, Diat!" Talmid growled, "Or we will not hesitate to use force!"

"Oh, I've seen plenty of your 'force' already." the Professor giggled. "If you notice, your fire hasn't hit a single of my little green minions." He gestured to the army of Zombie Monkeys that surrounded the soldiers on the floor. All of them were standing.

"Actually, that's because our phasers were set to disintegrate." Kyle said plainly.

"Oh." the professor scowled.

"And if you don't cooperate, we'll disintegrate you!" the Lieutenant continued, and he pointed his phaser straight at Ed Diat's chest. "Come on down."

"Actually, I'd rather not." Ed Diat sighed. "Feetie can take care of for me, right Feetie?"

"Yes my lord!" Feetie agreed, and all eyes turned to him again. A grenade in his palm, Feetie had his fingers ready to pull the pin and his arm ready to throw the perpetually armed weapon of doom at the Star Force trawler and send it to a fiery demise, all the loaded barrels of Dilithium along with it.

"It seems we have reached a stalemate." Ed Diat said.

"What do you want?" Talmid seethed. "Anything, within reason, and we'll grant it."

"Safe passage out of this dastardly plasma hole to the nearest Imperial Romulan Regime star base is all I need." the professor said.

"Oh...." Talmid groaned. "So it's been the Romulans all along. How cliche."

"Actually no, I just thought they would be more welcoming than the current Federation welcome wagon." Ed Diat corrected him. He looked down at all the laser pointers on his chest. "Much more welcoming."

Talmid facepalmed.

### Chapter 27

"I take it back!" Ed Diat said quickly. "In addition to safe passage out of here, I require a starship to realize that need, as well as no crew other than myself and Feetie, oh, and the Fleet Captain himself as well to accompany me on my voyage."

"You are so kidding me." Talmid groaned.

"I don't think so," Diat said with an evil grin. "It's your ship or we all go up in flames."

Talmid thought hard. Professor Ed Diat was insane. Giving this madman control over one of the Federation's mightiest battleships was a no brainer.

Still, he didn't want to get blown up in the middle of a plasma storm on a desolate planet.

Time to exploit Da Loopholes of Loopdeeloopy Loopness!

"For the safety of my crew," Talmid stated, turning to Lieutenant Kyle and the Star Force soldiers under his command, "I order you to stand down."

Watching in horror, Kyle could do nothing but stare helplessly as the soldiers around him lowered their phasers. A small nod from Talmid and the Lieutenant did the same.

Feetie grabbed a phaser rifle from one soldier, and holding in and the grenade at the ready, escorted Talmid to the door, where they were joined by Professor Ed Diat.

"Take me to your starship, Captain Talmid." Ed Diat growled in the Fleet Captain's face.

His breath stank.

\* \* \* \* \*

"I present you," Talmid said, stepping out of the turbolift with his arms held behind his back by Feetie, and onto the bridge of his starship, "the bridge of my starship."

Dave, Gary, and Brad leaped up from their chairs and were about to draw their phasers when Diat yelled, "Make one move and the Captain is disintegrated!"

That did it. "Listen to him," Talmid said with a grimace as Feetie held his arms tighter. "Evacuate all personnel to the engineering hull."

Brad glanced at Dave, who glanced at Gary, who nodded. "You heard the Fleet Captain, let's move."

The three senior officers left the bridge, Fleet Captain Talmid, and the saucer section of the Talmidon III behind as Ed Diat sat down in the commanding chair.

"They'll never fire on us with you on board," Diat grinned at Talmid, who could do nothing but wince as Feetie held him tightly.

Diat pressed some buttons on the armrest controls and said, "Commence saucer separation!"

"You are not Fleet Captain Talmid." the computer chirped.

"Override." Talmid wheezed.

"Saucer separation In progress." the computer updated.

The saucer's impulse engines roared to life as the locking clamps disconnected both sections of the hull from each other, the saucer lifting up and away from the engineering hull.

"All too easy." Diat cackled.                                 �

### Chapter 28 Part 1

"Set a course for the Ajilon system," Professor Ed Diat instructed the computer, and the rest of the Talmidon with it, saying each word very clearly. "Maximum warp."

"Insufficient fuel." the computer chirped.

Diat did a double take. "What? I said maximum warp!"

His outburst caught the attention of Feetie, who momentarily glanced above Talmid at the professor. Knowing this, Talmid braced his foot against the First Officer's chair which he stood to the side of.

"Insufficient fuel." the computer repeated.

Diat swung his gaze to Talmid. "You will tell the computer to obey!"

"Not this time," Talmid said, shaking his head.

"YOU WILL DO AS I SAY!!" Diat roared, angered by Talmid's disobedience.

"It ends here and now, Professor Ed Diat." Talmid said defiantly, each word sharply. "Shoot me, and my crew has nothing keeping them from firing on you.

"It seems we are at a stalemate." Talmid concluded.

Diat's scowl broke into a sneer. "So be it, Captain Talmid."

He raised his phaser, and at that moment Talmid put all of his force into the leg he had braced against the First Officer's chair and pushed. The move pushed him backwards into Feetie, knocking them both to the ground. Diat's phaser blast flew harmlessly over the two men, burning a hole in the bridge wall behind them.

Diat swung over the chair, and aimed the phaser at Talmid. "Prepare to die!"

Talmid rolled off Feetie, and the phaser blast struck the traitor instead. Howling with rage, Diat corrected his aim and fired at the fleeing Fleet Captain, who dove into the turbolift.

As the doors shut and the turbolift began its descent, Talmid panted a massive breath of relief, when suddenly the lift ground to a half. Talmid flew up to the ceiling before Newton's laws of physics gave way to gravity again and he hit the floor.

The lift resumed motion, but this time back up to the bridge. Wincing in pain, Talmid stood up and removed the panel in the turbolift ceiling, giving him access to the minute amount of space above the turbolift.

He couldn't run, but maybe he could hide.

The doors slid open just as Talmid made it through the small square opening, and several phaser blasts struck the back wall of the turbolift.

Diat strode in, Feetie's phaser rifle in hand. As the smoke cleared, Diat caught a glimpse of victory. The Fleet Captain was gone, nowhere to be seen, presumably disintegrated.

Until he jumped down from the roof, behind Diat.                                 �

### Chapter 28 Part 2

The professor spun around, firing as he went. Sparks proceeded to fly as the phaser fire went wild, striking the control board and reducing it to dust. The turbolift doors closed, trapping Talmid in with Ed Diat.

The Fleet Captain made a grab for the rifle, pushing it upwards and directing the fire to the ceiling. An even larger shower of sparks came down as Talmid wrestled with the professor, who wouldn't stop firing in a mad attempt to hit the Fleet Captain.

Until the younger, stronger Talmid wrestled the Phaser Rifle away from the madman. The gun was scalding HOT, and Talmid nearly dropped it as it burned his hands.

It was overheating! Thinking quickly, Talmid chucked it upwards through the access hatch to the roof of the turbolift, and just in time.

The rifle exploded, damaging the already doomed turbolift computer and the confused lift began a rapid descent to engineering.

Except engineering was in the engineering section, which was currently sitting in space several thousand megameters behind them.

The turbolift flew out of the Talmidon and into the endless abyss of space.

"It's over, professor!" Talmid yelled as they entered zero-gravity, pushing past Ed Diat to the wrecked control panel of the turbolift. "We both know I'm in charge now!"

"You'll never be in charge when I'm around, Captain Talmid." Ed Diat snarled.

That did it. Talmid swung around to face him, his arm and clenched fist poised to strike. "For the last time," he growled, "it's FLEET Captain Talmid."

"I still have your phaser." Ed Diat reminded him.

Slowly, Talmid relaxed the tense muscles in his neck and looked down. Ed Diat held his phaser against Talmid's stomach.

"You lose, Fleet Captain Talmid." Ed Diat announced with contempt.

He fired.�

### Chapter 29 Part 1

"Heaughehauhguheghhehehe." Diat cackled as the Fleet Captain crumpled to the ground.

Then he remembered that he was in space.

He didn't have much time to think about it though, because the control panel suddenly sparked to life, and Sergeant Judd Feetie's face appeared on the previously blank screen.

"Ah, Feetie." Diat greeted him. "It seems that I am in a bit of a predicament. I trust you will be able to beam me back to my ship?"

No response came from the man. Instead, the camera view zoomed out, revealing Feetie to be standing in front of the bridge's tactical station. The traitor's finger hung poised over the "Fire" button.

"Feetie?!" Diat said sharply. "What are you doing?!"

"I'm sorry...." Feetie whispered.

"I don't forgive you!" Diat screamed. He knew what was coming.

"....Fleet Captain Talmid." Feetie finished.

"Stop it Feetie, stop it now!" the professor hollered.

Aboard the Talmidon, the computer chirped, "Target identified."

"Goodbye, Professor." Feetie said grimly, cutting the communications channel with the turbolift control panel.

"Goodbye, Fleet Captain Talmid." He pressed the fire button!

\* \* \* \* \*

Talmid awoke in a world surrounded completley by white. As in completely. His vision was filled with white, and fog.

The Fleet Captain sat up, and waited for his vision to clear. A figure was striding towards him.

"Talmid?" the silhouette asked.

"....am I in Heaven?" he said slowly. The fog slowly began to lift. "How did...?"

Then his vision cleared, and Talmid recognized his surroundings as the Talmidon med bay. He was on a bed.

"Take it easy, Fleet Captain." Gary instructed, carefuly putting his hands on Talmid's shoulders and pushing him to rest on the bed. "You're recovering from a phaser shot."

That Talmid remembered. "I see, please tell me something I don't know."

Taken aback by Talmid's attitude, Gary looked shocked for a few seconds, and Talmid got the message.

"Sorry," Talmid said, "please tell me, how did you rescue me?"

Gary looked happier. "Well, after you went to the Talmidon, Lieutenant Kyle went up in another shuttle and brought us the Dilithium to turn on the transporters. But we weren't able to use them because by then you were inside the saucer section's shields, and we couldn't risk shooting at the saucer to bring down the shields."

"But then we left the Talmidon on a flying turbolift." Talmid murmured. "That's genius, Gary!"

His First Officer looked even happier. "Thank you, sir."                                 �

### Chapter 29 Part 2

"Any update on the situation of our two runaways?" Talmid asked.

"Oh," Gary's feet shuffled, "well, Professor Ed Diat is dead. After we beamed you out, someone, presumably Sergeant Feetie, fired a photon torpedo at the turbolift. It was destroyed."

"I see...." Talmid said. "Continue."

"As for Feetie," Gary continued, "once we were reconnected with the saucer section, Dave lead a squad of his security officers up to the bridge to arrest him. Feetie's in the brig now."

"Oh good." Talmid grumbled. "That should serve him right."

Gary coughed. "It should probably be said though, he feels very remorseful for his actions. The man keeps rambling about everything he has done and how he let the Fleet Captain die."

Talmid shrugged. "Oh.... I guess I'll pay him a visit."

"Well, actually Fleet Captain," Gary said, "Feetie is not the only one who thinks you are dead. Only the med staff and myself are aware that you are still living. I was the only person left on the bridge to beam you out, because everyone else was in panic mode."

"Well that's about to change!" Talmid exclaimed, and slapped his combadge.

Err, the area of his chest where his combadge would have been, if it hadn't NOT been there.

Not discouraged, Talmid grabbed Gary's combadge and punched it. The combadge beeped, and Talmid was about to announce his life, when Gary yelled, "STOP!!"

"Stop what?" Shirley said from her side of the combadge, the bridge. She sounded sad.

"Disregard this, Commander." Gary said, and closed the channel. He turned back to Talmid. "Sir, there's an event going on in the auditorium room, to honor you."

Talmid's eyebrows shot up. "You're not suggesting-"

Gary couldn't hide it any longer, and his usual poker face erupted into a fit of laughter.

"-I crash the party?"                                 �

### Chapter 30

Never before had the Talmidon auditorium room been filled to its maximum capacity. Maximum capacity was, in fact, designed to fit way more than even the full Talmidon crew, in case, say other starship crews were stopping by for the party.

Which was the case. Orbiting the planet Jevera IV was the USS Talmidon, Minuteman Division, Hyrecipian Admiral Adligii's fleet, even Admiral Green's personal fleet, and some other various combat squadrons and brigades to serve with Fleet Captain Talmid.

It all would have been a heart-moving, tear-invoking, eulogy for the fallen Star Fleet officer, Fleet Captain, and friend, had he fallen.

Which he had NOT.

The corridors were very much empty, seeing as that four starship crews were all jammed like sardines inside the auditorium, giving Talmid and Gary easy travel through, well, the corridors.

Yet somehow they ran into Brad Tylers.

"OHMAHGERSH!" Brad screamed, wiping his tears away on his sleeve, running towards the Fleet Captain, and hugging him.

More like tackling him. Gary grabbed Talmid's shoulders and somewhat managed to steady him.

"Fleetcaptainfleetcaptainfleetcaptainyouarealive!!!" Brad wailed. "We all thought you were dead!"

Talmid pushed Brad off of him and recentered his center of gravity back on his feet. "Let's just say, news of all type travels fast, regardless it being true or false. In this case, it's false."

Brad glanced at Gary. "It's not a hologram, right?" he asked, pointing at Talmid. "I can see the sight of him waltzing into the auditorium giving half the room heart attacks."

Talmid thumped him on the back. "I am most certainly real, helm boy, now let's go give everyone heart attacks. For great justice!" he hollered down the empty hallways as he set off for the auditorium, leaving Brad and Gary behind.

"Yep, most certainly real." Gary confirmed.

\* \* \* \* \*

Everyone except for Talmid, Gary, and Brad was seated on seats, so there was nobody guarding the doors to scream, "OMG TALMID LIVES" as Talmid approached the door. Admiral Green was standing at the end of the room on a podium, about to give a speech.

Defiantly, Talmid spun on his heel and entered the room. "The reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated." he announced.

"OMG TALMID LIVES" someone screamed.

Talmid facepalmed.                                 �

### Part 31 --- End

Fleet Captain Talmid was in his ready room, standing by the window, overlooking the realms of space. His face wore no expression, and this was truly an accurate display of what was going on inside his head. The usual churning ocean of those neurological charges called thought that was his mind was unusually calm.

It could be called, the calm before the storm.

The doors slid open, and without turning around, Talmid said, "You wanted to see me, Captain?"

"Actually," Gary Vermont said, "I just wanted to make sure things were running smoothly on your side of this bulkhead." He patted the wall, then stopped. "Uh, I guess that does qualify as 'wanting to see you.'"

A minute of silence passed between the two officers. A miniscule period, relative to the amount of time that the two men had served together as a whole.

Talmid finally turned around, looking up and facing his First Officer. His expression was now one of anxiety, despair, maybe even a bit of longing. "How long has it been?" he queried.

"More than a decade." Gary shrugged it off, or at least tried. "Or two...."

Talmid nodded. "For twenty years we've held this crew together. Your reassignment is not one that we will recover from easily...."

Gary offered a short smile. "You'll still have Dave, Albert, Brad.... you'll keep this crew going."

Talmid stepped forward, and this time he touched the wall. "But, I worry about the Talmidon.... we can never seem to keep HER bulkheads together, when we are not."

He returned to the window, Gary at his side, both staring wistfully out the armored pane. "You're going, Shirley's going," Talmid whispered, "we're all going our separate ways."

"Which is why I came." Gary reminded him. "I need to determine whether you are physically and mentally able to command this starship, or I will make it my duty to relieve you of command."

"Very funny...." Talmid grumbled, but inside he lit up. "Nothing like a joke to lighten up the moment."

"Let's keep it that way." Gary stated.

Talmid agreed. "We can hold the official ceremony in the auditorium at.... oh I don't care, how about now?"

"Sounds good to me."

"Let's get to it, then."

"Be my guest."

"YOU'RE the guest, now."

"We're not in the auditorium yet."

With that, Talmid called everyone to the auditorium. Ten minutes later, the Talmidon was cruising on autopilot and the full crew of the USS Talmidon III Refit were assembled at the massive auditorium within the much more massive saucer section of the even more massive starship.

For sooth, that is another story.

THE END