Thomas "The Mad" Jefferson

*"In the beginning, the Scooby gang was arrested at a traffic stop, because Shaggy hid 67 pounds of marijuana in the tires of the Mystery Machine."* -- Thomas Jefferson, 1776

**Biography**

Thomas "The Mad" Jefferson was the third president of the United States, and was known for his conspiracy theories and possibly correct prophecies. It was speculated by his wife (Mrs. Thomas "Martha" Jefferson) and fellow president and friend John Adams that he "just wasn't the same" after the first Fourth of July party.

During his life, many strange events occurred before, during, and after his presidency. His belief in Dwarves prior to their discovery led him to dig labyrinths under his manor with a plastic spoon, searching for entrances into their kingdom. Thomas Jefferson also seemed to have an affinity for wanting to kill dragons, as he had a set of plate armor commissioned for him. It is believed that he wanted to rediscover Dragons after they disappeared for the most part (with the exception of Denzil) in the late 15th century. He led several expeditions into Canada, and ended up being lost at the end of 1809, which is why he never ran for a third term. This caused James Madison to avenge Hamilton's death and run virtually unopposed against Aaron Burr, whose political career had been slowly fizzling out after Hamilton was killed in the New Jersey duel.

Thomas Jefferson also was an early expert zoologist on the race of humanoid Lizard people, as he'd learned that several members of the presidential cabinet were Lizard people who openly shed their hides. Seeing that they were quite good at their jobs, he wrote and published several papers, saying "maybe you don't *need* to be a human to have a political career." This paper was widespread and eventually led to the Lizardfolk Civil-Rights Movement, where Lizard People were granted equal rights to humans, as they are basically the same, except for the fact that they're all like the Geico gecko. Sadly, the last non-human to hold a position in office was a horse that was elected governor of Maryland in the year 1841. William Henry Harrison then passed an amendment stating that only humans could become president of the United States, as it was a country made by humans. It is speculated that this was done because the horse was actually his ex-wife's horse, and he had frequently said that he thought the horse was a lizard. Later on in 1953, any "bipedal creature [born on] American soil with warm-blood" was allowed to run for presidency along with all other previous requirements.

The President died in 1818 while sitting at his desk, suffering from an epileptic seizure caused by the flickering light of a candle. A butler nearby along with Jefferson's wife later said that he was shouting strange foreign words such as "Covfefe" and was incorrectly pronouncing Genghis Khan's name.

**Proof of being a time traveller**

There is evidence supporting that either (A) Thomas Jefferson is a time traveller or (B) T.J. has interacted with time travelers. For one, historians have a collection of his plastic cutlery, all of which should not have existed until the 1950s. Moreover, he more than accurately predicts dozens upon dozens of things that happen centuries in the future.

**Conspiracy Theories Thomas believed in**

The following is a non-comprehensive list of Thomas Jefferson's beliefs.

Dwarves (Confirmed)

Hollowed Earth (Confirmed)

Liches (Confirmed)

Portals to different realms (Confirmed)

Life was all a simulation (Debatable)