"Remains of the Day"/Croc's doubt

This is how "Remains of the Day" and Croc's doubt goes in The Batman Meets the Corpse Bride.

[Back in the Land of the Dead, Victor, Batman, Batgirl and Robin wake up]

Alfred: New arrivals.

Emily: They must've fainted. Are you alright?

Batgirl: [moans] I must've blacked out.

Robin: So did I.

Batman: We've got company, guys.

Alfred: By Jove, man, looks like we've got ourselves breathers.

Mrs. Plum: Do any of them have dead brothers?

Batgirl: No, but I had a dad who died in my arms.

Skeleton Boy: They're still soft.

General Bonesapart: A toast, then! [drinks a pint] To the newlyweds and our honored guests.

Batman: Newlyweds? Honored guests?

Robin: Will someone tell me what's going on here?

Emily: In the woods, Victor said his vows so perfectly. [shows them the ring]

Batgirl: [gasps] Victor, do you realize what you've done? You fool, you married a dead woman!

Victor Van Dort: I did? I did. [slams his head on a bar] Wake up, wake up, wake up!

Paul: Bonjour! Coming through, coming through! My name is Paul, I am the head waiter. [laughs] I will be creating your wedding feast.

[Maggot comes out of Emily's eye]

Maggot: Wedding feast! I'm salivating.

Batman: A worm?

Emily: Maggots. [giggles]

Batgirl: Okay, listen, we need answers. What's going on here? Where are we? Who are you?

Emily: Well, that's kind of a long story.

Bonejangles: What a story it is.

[They see him]

Bonejangles: A tragic tale of romance, passion and murder most foul.

Robin: This should be interesting.

General Bonesapart: This is gonna be good.

Bonejangles: Hit it, boys.

[The light turns green and Bonejangles bonks on other skeletons' heads as another one plays a piano]

**Bonejangles:**

Hey! Give me a listen you corpses of cheer

At least those of you who still got an ear

I'll tell you a story that'll make a skeleton cry

Of our own jubiliciously lovely Corpse Bride

**Chorus:**

Die, die, we all pass away

But don't wear a frown cause it's really okay

You might try and hide

And you might try and pray

But we all end up the remains of the day

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Yeah, yeah, yeah

**Bonejangles:**

Well, our girl was a beauty known for miles around

Til a mysterious stranger came into town

He was plenty good-looking, but down on his cash

And our poor little baby she fell hard and fast

When her daddy said no, she just couldn't cop

So our lovers came up with a plan to elope

**Chorus:**

Die, die, we all pass away

But don't wear a frown cause it's really okay

You might try and hide

And you might try and pray

But we all end up the remains of the day

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Yeah, yeah, yeah

**Bonejangles:**

Oh, that's right

Okay, oh yeah

Come on, boys, pick it up

Yeah, like it

Okay, Chancy, take it

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah-yeah-yeah!

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah-yeah-yeah!

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah (Yo!)

Oh, that's nice

Yeah!

So they conjured up a plan to meet late at night

They told not a soul, kept the whole thing tight

Now her mother's wedding dress fit like a glove

You don't need much when you're really in love

Except for a few things, or so I'm​ told

Like the family jewels and a satchel of gold

Then next to the graveyard by the old oak tree

On a dark foggy night at a quarter to three

She was ready to go, but where was he?

**Crowd:**

And then?

**Bonejangles:**

She waited

**Crowd:**

And then?

**Bonejangles:**

There in the shadows, was it her man?

**Crowd:**

And then?

**Bonejangles:**

Her little heart beat so loud

**Crowd:**

And then?

**Bonejangles:**

And then, baby, everything went black

Now when she opened her eyes she was dead as dust

Her jewels were missing and her heart was bust

So she made a vow lying under that tree

That she'd wait for her true love to come set her free

Always waiting for someone to ask for her hand

When out of the blue comes this groovy young man

Who vows forever to be by her side (Oh yeah, oh yeah)

And that's the story of our own Corpse Bride (Oh yeah, oh yeah)

**Chorus:**

Die, die, we all pass away

But don't wear a frown cause it's really okay

You might try and hide

And you might try and pray

But we all end up the remains of the day

**Bonejangles:**

Do-bop

E-do-bop

E-didly-bob-e-do-bop

Yeah

[We cut to Team Crystal King in the Land of the Living]

Firefly: So, this guy you met, Your Lordship, what's he doing all the way out here?

Crystal King: He has been murdering wealthy woman for their fortunes for years. [hears a knock on his door] Enter.

[Barkis opens the door and enters the room]

Crystal King: Team, meet Lord Barkis Bittern. [to Barkis] I trust the room was to your liking?

Barkis Bittern: Thank you, you are a most gracious host. Which is why it pleases me to be the bearer of some good news. [snaps his finger as the town crier arrives] Would you care to repeat tonight's headline for us?

Town crier: Hear ye, hear ye! Victor Van Dort, the Batman, the Batgirl and Robin seen this night on the bridge in the arms of a mystery woman! The dark haired temptress, Master Van Dort and the Caped Crusader Trio slipped away into the night! And now the weather. Scattered showers--

The Penguin: Oy! A little privacy, please?!

Barkis Bittern: Enough! That will be all.

[The town crier leaves]

Killer Croc: Mystery woman? Do they even know any women?

Barkis Bittern: Or so you thought. Do call for me if you need my assistance in any way. [closes the door]

Owlman: Weird.

Two-Face: What should we do?

Joker: Fetch my laughing gas!

Bane: As much as I would hate to suggest it, the Van Dorts and Everglots will have to get a free pass tonight as our focus must be finding on the Batman and his sidekicks.

Killer Croc: Regardless, they're one groom short for this wedding tomorrow.

Catwoman: Not to mention the financial implications.

Mr. Freeze: A most scandalous embarrassment for us all.

Crystal King: Patience, my friends. They will return, and we shall be ready.

[They all smirk as we see Deathstroke in the woods]

Deathstroke: Umarak said Emily was murdered somewhere in these woods. [sees a batarang] Batman and his sidekicks are here? [notices the shadow of where Emily was murdered] Whoa.

[He picks up the batarang]

Deathstroke: [gets his commlink] This is Slade Wilson for Umarak. I've investigated the scene of the crime, and I've discovered Barkis was here, but there's a complication. Batman and his sidekicks are here in England.

Umarak: The Dark Knight from Gotham City? What would he be doing there?

Deathstroke: I don't know, but I'm telling you, Umarak, I'm pretty sure the batarang I found belongs to him.

Umarak: Okay, listen, I'll send my protocol droid to analyze it, but focus on finding Barkis, and investigate the rumors that this Crystal King has assembled a team of Gotham's villainous supercriminals.

Deathstroke: Will do. I'll find out all the proof you need. I won't let you down.

[He enters the village]