Vanna White

Vanna White on the set of Wheel of Fortune before Janley Manley vs. the Citizens of Hell.

## Physical description

### Eye color

Red

**Vanna White** (January 1, 10000 BCE-*present*) is a famous, well-renowned icon in the Rebabone Universe. She first gained recognition as a film star in the prehistoric ages. White is considered a threat to the human race due to her large height, and is often dubbed as **SCP-66669420**. White later assumed roles on Wheel of Fortune, developing a relationship with public whore Pat Sajak, who has been known to have several affairs with Janley Manley, Steve Harvey, Lamont J. Slinccy, among many others. White operates The Van, alongside Paula Deen, going around to "save" children from the streets of Kektuncy. White has received many accolades for her work in Rebabone: The Movie and Fuck Finn.

## Life

### Early Life

White was born as a result of God's right foot violently exploding in the atmosphere above Podunk, Kektuncy, creating a nebular gas that became The Lord. The gas formed into White, and White roamed the extremities of space for hundreds of years, until settling on Earth around 98000 BCE. White was raised on a ranch near Fried Chicken, Kektuncy, and learned how to film gay pornography on "Ram Ranch". White met Lamont J. Slinccy at a local bar in Rebabone, Kektuncy around 97953 BCE, resulting in the "Vanna White Slap Scandal", in which M Slinccy, Lamont's eventual wife, violently attacked White with a giant wooden penis, snapping White's spine in half. Slinccy then rode away on her "electric pussy scooter", which later inspired her to write a song with the same name, featuring Cupcakke.

Vanna White was left paralyzed for 30 years, and after treatment, she was sent to live in Hell, Michigan, operating a local shop that sold DVDs, porn, and marijuana. During her time spent here, she met Paula Deen, who operated the local store, Hell-In-A-Handbasket. Deen taught White how to slaughter thousands of foster kids to use in various dishes, such as "Miscarriage Soup", which was popular among the residents of Gaylord, Michigan, who all later died from ebola.

### Citizens of Hell vs. Janley Manley

*Main article: Janley Manley vs. the Citizens of Hell*

In 97832 BCE, Janley Manley traveled back in time after snorting a concoction of drugs, extending her massive fucking neck into the sky and obliterating all of Hell, causing numerous fatalities. Among the survivors were Vanna White and Paula Deen. This incident forced White and Deen to relocate to Rebabone, Kektuncy, where Deen was eventually seen as the second coming of Large Pig.

### Vanna White Vagina Malfunction (1976)

During the 1976 United States presidential election, Vanna White presented the results of the election on live television. She was an avid supporter of Gus Hall, the Communist Party candidate for president. Upon hearing that Hall received zero votes for the election, White's clitoris infamously fell out on live television and began sharting all over the goddamn conference room, prompting an evacuation for 12,000 residents in the downtown district of Rebabone. It is rumored that the portal opened by her descending vagina may have created Acrabbingsway. Approximately 37 people died from the incident, including Jimmy Carter, who was memorialized in a peanut statue in rural Georgia, with the inscription "IN THE YEAR OF OUR LORD 1976".

### Pat Sajak Sex Scandal (2000)

On March 17, 2000, Pat Sajak and Vanna White boarded Kektuncy Airlines Flight 73. White and Sajak began to reportedly violently fuck in the economy class of the plane, prompting at least four people to commit suicide via jumping out their windows. Lil Nas X jumped out of his window in first class, but flew into the jet engine, turning into shrapnel, which struck the Pentagon. The commotion from the violent sex caused pilots Megan Thee Stallion and Mike White to crash the plane into the Large Pig Cathedral in downtown Rebabone, killing everyone on the plane except Sajak and White. Large Pig was injured in the incident but remained in stable condition. The United States government attempted to arrest Sajak and White, however, Vanna White inhaled the entirety of the FBI, erasing them from existence.

### White Power Electric Company

In 2003, Vanna White, alongside famous author and explorer Nathan Bedford Forrest, founded White Power Electric Company, headquartered in Cocksburg, Wyoming. The company bought out a former power plant owned by the Cough Man Company, after Cough Man had been found guilty of committing tax evasion in early 2002. White Power Electric ended up opening more than 250,000 jobs, but because nobody was interested in working for the company, Vanna White imported hundreds of thousands of children from the Deep South, forcing them into child labor. The United States government did not bat an eye at the situation, and instead, renowned political activist Xandra Xok Abernathy spoke against the claims, while high on LSD. Abernathy showed up to the factory on July 29, 2003, and began to violently bludgeon Forrest to death with a massive toothpick. Forrest suffered 206 fractures, and was turned into a fine red mist as Abernathy broke into the "cloning room", where clones of the child labor workers were made. This event spawned the Xandra Cloning Scandal of 2004. Vanna White eventually caught word of Abernathy inside of the factory, declaring an "INCREDIBLE LOCKDOWN". Wendy Williams and Ted Wray, security staff at the plant, were sent to assassinate Abernathy. However, Abernathy had ass blasted both of them into the atmosphere, and Wendy Williams's body was captured hovering over Iran the following day on MODIS satellites. Wray's body plummeted into Boys, Imahoe, causing a nuclear explosion and M10.0 earthquake, which killed the entire population of Wyoming. Wray survived, and eventually began to produce heavy metal albums.

After these events occurred, White infamously self-destructed the factory, causing the Cocksburg Crater, where the Pilger Pickle Man is rumored to inhabit after the 2014 twin tornadoes.

### Rebabone: The Movie and Fuck Finn (2020-2021)

In early 2020, after bombing the Wheel of Fortune studio, Vanna White began to work on Rebabone: The Movie. Movie production lasted for a little over 3 minutes, and its rushed release prompted a critic review of -578% on Rotten Janleys, resulting in the movie staff getting lined in a firing squad by Lin Wood and The Lori.

In late 2020, the cast of Rebabone: The Movie made reprise role appearances in Fuck Finn, a movie about a disabled North Carolinian man that fell in love with another disabled New York man, and together, bombed thousands of cities globally. The movie ended with Vanna White, as a member of the KKK, tying the titular character to a cross and setting him on fire in Buddha, Indiana. The movie is the only movie to ever receive a positive score on Rotten Janleys, a 100%.

## Accolades

* Best Sex Scandal: Pat Sajak and Vanna White (WON)
* Best Actress: Rebabone: The Movie (NOMINATED: LOST TO JANLEY MANLEY IN HELL, MICHIGAN) (resulted in the 1945 Japan bombings)
* Best Actress: Fuck Finn (WON)
* Best TrapMaster: Horace Greeleypeople Documentary (WON)

## See Also

* Janley Manley
* Lamont J. Slinccy
* Xandra Xok Abernathy
* M Slinccy
* Grenadine Slinccy
* Marilyn the Heroin Addict
* Hehese Hesuyusee
* Cough Man