There's Something About Mya

***There's Something About Mya*** is the seventh episode of *The Adventures of Evie and Mya* in Season 1 and the seventh episode overall.

## Synopsis

In the light of the disasterous trip to Cracklog Manor, Mya grapples with feelings she has never once felt in her life - especially when they're strong, persuasive, and making her want her own best friend as something more.

## Transcript

*Oh my god, it can't be true. This cannot be true!*

Mya Heartley was biting her tongue, and bad, during the car ride home from the enchanting, yet disaster-ridden Geiger Heights, face stuck on the window as if it had been permamently glued there.

There had been copious, uneasy silence between her and her parents. She had, however, received a firm scolding for getting herself, along with her best friend, the honorable Evie, in hot water by breaking and entering into Cracklog Manor, once a magnificent manor now falling apart.

The guilt was going to sit with her for eons, but the escapade didn't matter.

Mya had lost her *marbles*, not because she was an air-brained brat, but because of *Evie*.

She could *never* leave her mind. She could never be shaken off. She was stuck there, every detail, every nook and cranny of her brain filled with nothing but her friend and every fragment of her, every bit that made her *complete*.

Her soft, drop-dead gorgeous eyes, her long black hair that drifted like the sea in the wind, her pale skin, her cute freckled cheeks...

*No! Get out!* Mya shook her head and winced, dragging her forehead across the window.

It was fruitless. Evie boomeranged right back and remained lodged there, a log in a dam she couldn't dislodge, and Mya *hoped* her parents were *not* seeing her the rapidly-acculmulating red on her face that was spreading *everywhere*.

The rest of the car ride home was silence, except for Mya, who could hear her jagged breathing and strained bubbling - all because her friend had trapped her behind indivisible bars.

When they had parked the car in the garage, Mya stormed ahead of her parents in a panic and into the living room, ignoring their conversation about the picnic and what to do with the rest of the day, shutting it all out, letting herself become enclosed by smog.

Picking up speed, she sped into the bathroom with haste and shut the door, back to it, panting, *sweating*.

She sat down, rubbing her temples in the notion that her mind would be cleansed, but she hadn't yet learned her lesson.

What goes around *comes around*.

The events of Cracklog and Geiger possessed her, taking hold of her body and squeezing it, snaking around it, and her breathing shot up to the moon in intensity.

Mya had been chastised and told off today multiple times for the Cracklog Manor incident, and rightfully so; she was a dunce, a thickhead, and a senseless, naive dodo-brain. Her parents were disappointed and had put her in her place, having said what needed to be said, and she was relieved it wasn't as bad as the *other* scolding.

Evie's mother - and quick-to-fight, *brutal* mother - Opal.

Opal had *exploded* on Mya in mutinous rage, ripping into her without hearing her case or a single version from her of *what* happened in Cracklog. She wanted her to *be* miserable for not only hurting herself, but for hurting Evie too, even if they weren't actually hurt and were just rattled.

*Still,* she thought. *I was a fool. Blind. Because of me, Evie could have been hurt! My friend could have turned on me! We'd no longer be the dynamic duo, cherries to each other's pies... and I'd be back in the place I was before, cowardly and lost in the dark...*

The memory of Opal's confrontation was painful, but it served as a powerful reminder that her actions had consequences.

On the seemingly harmless trip into the forest around Geiger Heights, Mya had dragged Evie all around, marveling at beauty and animals and the in-betweens, but in reality, she had wanted to show her the crown jewel on a hill: Cracklog Manor, designated as historical.

It was all fun and games to Mya at first, although Evie wasn't as thrilled, but she stuck beside her friend, and the two were on their merry way.

But, what Mya had missed was blatantly obvious: Evie had merely gone in to keep that placid smile on her face. She had put up with her own discomforts for her sake. And when those concerns had amounted significantly, Evie snapped at her and broke away, needing time to herself.

Mya had been heartbroken and had reflected on her actions solemnly, and realized without a doubt that she wanted Evie, needed her, had a *yearning* for her so strong it couldn't fizzle out.

She'd be nowhere if it weren't for Evie. She'd be in the desert, crawling by with cactus thorns in her back.

However, she and Evie had their reunion, understanding their faults in communicating.

And then it happened.

A trip, a fall, a smack, and a *kiss*.

An *accidental* kiss.

Mya had *never* wanted to do such a thing, especially to her *best friend*. It still happened nonetheless.

Despite the contact and lip-on-lip mania, the real epiphany would not drop on Mya's head until when she and Evie had bidded each other their farewells.

She couldn't stop *staring* at Evie's physique, suddenly so charming.

She couldn't stop *staring* at Evie's eyes, suddenly so magnetic and bewitching.

She couldn't stop *staring* at Evie and seeing her smile, the innocence, the stout personality shine through.

The blocks had been stacked, brick by brick, and the thoughts flashed across Mya's mind before she could stop them.

She *needed* Evie to hug her. Touch her gently, the way she always did when they were close or sharing a moment. Hold her.

*Kiss* her. This time, no accidents. A *real* kiss.

Mya *yearned* for Evie to be *hers* and *no one else's*.

*What the... why am I thinking these things?? What is wrong with me? I don't understand why I feel like this!*

Mya, choking for air and unable to comprehend why she was feeling these... these *things* for Evie, staggered to her feet and clutched the sink, where she gazed into the mirror, greeting her reflection, her twin, who stared back at her with equally stressed eyes.

What on *earth* had changed? *Why* had she begun to feel this way about her own friend?

*Surely I have to be sick???*

Worried, Mya stuck her tongue out. No discoloration.

She peered at her face. No discolor, no warts, no marks and bruises (except the bruise she got in the manor, which was no more than a tiny blemish).

She pulled down her bottom eyelids. The reds around the bottom of her eyes wasn't anything but dark red.

She glanced at her hair and eyes. No dull coloring or signs of decay.

She pulled out a mini thermometer and put it to her head. *Beep*.

*98 F*

No fever.

Mya groaned. She wasn't *sick*, not physically, and all was normal.

Except that all *wasn't* actually normal.

If she wasn't ill, *what* on *earth* had caused her to react so *wildly* to Evie?

*Something's wrong with me! But what? What can't I understand...?*

In the deep corners of her head, shrouded in mystery, she could hear cackling, a chuckle so familiar her head spun, and she grasped her temples.

Warmth and flowers and *power* flooded through her head.

*Evie*.

Immediately, more shards of Evie took up rent in Mya's mind. Her giggle, the way she'd laugh if you'd tickle her behind her neck, her precious love of books and reading, her brutal honesty, the unintentional, hilarious side of her...

Those *beautiful* eyes and her spirit burning *bright*...

Evie had stormed into her entire life and taken over *control* of it. There was no escape.

Mya, reluctantly facing the mirror, stared at herself again and put a hand to her cheekbone, tracing it delicately and sliding it down to her chin.

Nothing. She felt nothing, only emptiness.

Then, she repeated the action, but this time, she imagined it was *Evie* doing this to her. The delicate tracing of her cheekbone, the frame, and sliding that smooth hand of hers down to her chin, where she gripped it and rubbed it and left it there, resting it, letting it stay.

Mya's cheeks has turned into *big* tomatoes.

That *touch*...

*I need Evie to do that to me... it... it feels so right...*

She did it again, and again, and again, and all Mya felt was *vindication*.

She should be doing this. She wanted *Evie* to be doing this.

But here she was, alone in a bathroom, trying to alleviate her hollowing heart, but her touch on her own face was barely anything compared to her friend's.

It hit her.

Reality.

The *truth*.

Mya, panicking, glanced at the door and back at the mirror, and her reflection, her twin, as equally panicked, eyed her with shock.

The denial had faded, and now came the answers she had sought, but they only added to her disbelief.

She couldn't *believe it* at *all*.

*Long ago, I thought I was born normally. I didn't stray from any lines. I didn't trip over my own feet, haul myself into danger... I couldn't speak up. I was a different person back then...*

*And now, I'm even more different, but I can't go back...*

Sinking to the floor, Mya tucked her knees into her stomach and held onto herself, the anguish kicking in and dread marring her in swipes.

She had refused to accept it. *It*, the one thing she *feared*, the one thing she didn't want to *say out loud*. Embarrassed or horrified, she didn't yet know.

But it had found a way to resonate.

Mya couldn't keep shoving it aside, and giving up, she took the one explanation to her erratic ways in.

*What happened in Cracklog... I kissed a girl. I... I like kissing girls! I want to kiss another girl, and not just any girl, but Evie...*

*I really want to kiss Evie. Her lips tasted so... sweet.*

*I've fallen for my best friend.*

And then the other part of the truth crashed into her.

*Oh my god! I'm... I'm gay!*

**SEASON 1, EPISODE 7 - THERE'S SOMETHING ABOUT MYA**

Upon nightfall, Mya walked into her room, yawning and wearing her pajamas.

She had spent the *whole* rest of the day wrapping her head around her new queer identity, something which felt so *isolated* and not natural, but out of place, almost as if it was just a cosmetic attachment to her she could turn on and off.

But that wasn't true. She was queer and couldn't deny it, the way she openly longed for Evie, her crush, the person that could make her turn red and put her in a trance, never to be broken or halted.

And yet, coping with being queer wasn't her *sole* problem. She was keeping it from *her parents* and her *friends*.

Even *Evie*.

*They... they can't know I'm a mess and wanna kiss girls! They'll look at me and think I'm crazy! I've been straight up until now and I've only pined for guys! Guys! Winter would think I'm a moron, but Evie...*

Evie had known Mya for *years*, and this change was so *sudden* it could rattle the very roots of their friendship.

*Evie doesn't like men. She doesn't like romance. What if she hates me for pining after a girl? For wanting me to kiss girls, hold them, hug them, define every inch of them?*

*Why am I thinking like this!? I sound freaky...*

Mya didn't know a single thing about what her future could hold and where she could stand - and whether or not if Evie would be beside her through storms and clear weather.

*Who am I now?*

Evie was still in her head, floating there, voice echoing and presence brightening the dim spaces. The gloom replaced with cheer and fast-blooming flowers.

Alas, Mya felt no happier, solace an empty, dusty book, and she flopped onto her bed, unmoving, the energy seeping out of invisible pores on her skin.

How could she tell her loved ones that she was gay? In love with her best friend, falling for her and *harder* than an anvil?

Was there any way she could without making herself a clown operating a circus for failures?

Was *she* a failure?

How could she *ever* tell Evie that she had a gigantic crush on her and wanted to be her significant other? Just *how*?

Mya was at a dead end. Her sources of contact, her parents and her friends, were out of reach - the risks were too high, and she never, *ever* wanted to have Winter's horrific fate after her botched coming out.

She shook her head. No, that was thinking *way* too far ahead. Yawning, she flopped into bed and yanked on the cord of her lamp, turning it off, and she shut her eyes.

*Buzz*.

"What the..." she mumbled, turning the light back on and grabbing her phone off her nightstand, turning it on. Light flooded her face and bluntly glared at her eyes, causing her to almost shut them again.

She turned her brightness down and scrolled up, looking at her notifications.

She gasped.

*Evie 10:02PM*

*Hey My, free day tomorrow. Wanna walk @ Pinelake w/ me?*

"W-Wha?" Mya asked in a whisper to herself, disbelieving this entire text message.

Evie? With her at the *park*, the place where they first met? *Together*?

It seemed like any average park visit, but Mya was sweating into ten different buckets.

*How* would she be able to *last* a walk beside Evie, a person she found unique and *attractive* the more she thought about her? Her impulse and desire to have Evie love her the way she did were spiraling - if she didn't have *control* of her feelings, she could rip their friendship in two, broken halves.

She glanced at the text message, a few minutes passing by, and she was at a loss for how to respond.

*How... do I say something... without her suspecting I'm having an existential crisis???*

Reluctantly, Mya moved her fingers on the keys, typing but retracting, typing and retracting, repeating said process. Everything she conjured looked *wrong* and *unauthetic*.

"Why am I doing this to myself..." she groaned, frustrated, and she let her fingers slide across the keys.

Suddenly, her finger hit enter.

A message - clunky and full of *gibberish* - was sent to Evie.

The message became marked as *read*.

Mya blushed profusely, and yelping, she ducked under her bed and away from her phone, fearing she had just made one of the *worst* impressions she could have made to Evie.

Past *ten* at *night*.

So much for a good night's sleep.

Her phone buzzed. Evie had replied. Swallowing down dry lumps in her throat, Mya crawled out of her covers and plucked the phone, finding Evie's new message.

*Someone is sleepy XDDD you're so cute when you type drunk*

Mya's face went *extremely* red.

*WHAT THE HELL EV*

Evie typed and responded a second later.

*I'm teasing you the way you tease me lol. Anyways u down for tomorrow? About to head in for the night before you-know-who yells at me to sleep*

Mya's cheeks warmed. Aww, that was so *adorable* of Evie! Thinking on her level...

In a way, that wasn't embarrassing, and she wasn't overreacting.

Maybe Mya *had* this in the bag.

Smiling, she texted a clear response at last.

*Sure <3*

Evie typed back. *Yay! Can't wait to see you tomorrow, dork <3 Night!*

Mya shut her phone off and placed it face-down on her nightstand.

The deal was done. She'd be meeting Evie tomorrow, and if she was going to make it a successful day, she'd have to sleep off her worries.

She still had a lot to learn, process, and figure out - was this a step in the right direction?

Mya did not know, but she hoped for a better tomorrow than she had today.

The next morning, Mya woke up, fresh of her troubles from the prior day, and heading into the kitchen, she made herself a bowl of cereal with milk and sat down on the sofa, where she ate away watching the morning news.

Today, the weather was going to be sunny, and no signs of winter weather were imminent. Finally, Pineshadow was out of the frigid, snowy cold and heading into spring.

That was a relief - Mya could wear her jacket less and start to run around more in the warm, glimmering sun - with Evie by her side.

*Evie by her side*.

She blushed. How cute that would be... and how perfect too.

As she finished her cereal, swallowing her last bite, the doorbell rang.

Her heart *thumped*.

*Evie*.

*That's her! God I gotta prepare I gotta look professional come on-*

"I'll get it!" she called, wiping the milk and crumbs off her face with a napkin and speeding to the door, turning to the knob and opening it wide.

And sure enough, there was Evie, in her favorite sweater, jeans, and boots, leaning up against the doorframe, smile on her rounded, narrow face.

*She's so beautiful-*

"Good morning, Mya!" Evie greeted, interrupting her admiration stint, and she pulled her friend into a tight hug with two muscular, defined arms. Mya, tensing, could sense her face growing red as her nose and face were buried in pale, lemongrass-scented skin, soft and... *pleasing*.

*This is everything I want...*

Wait a damn minute.

Mya wanted her face *stuck in Evie's skin*.

Like *this*.

Her friend had *just* got here, and already she had made a mockery of herself.

Alarmed, she pulled away, her entire face looking as if she had gotten sunburned.

Evie, shocked that she flustered her friend, frowned. "Gracious, did I overdo it?" she asked, and Mya shook her head quickly, diminishing her shock to confusion.

"What's gotten you so red, Mya?" she prompted for a second time, moving up to her, and Mya bit her lip.

*So... endearing...*

"Oh, it's nothing, sorry! We got pretty close, after all, heh..." She dragged her foot on the ground, and Evie nodded, accepting her answer.

"Alright. There's a little wind chill, so go grab your jacket. Don't want ya getting cold, if you know what I mean," she replied, elbowering her, and Mya's face went red *again*.

"Mmmhmm, yep, my jacket!" Anxiously, and with flushed cheeks, she sauntered over to the ottoman, where her jacket was resting on, and she pulled it over her head. She then stumbled up back to Evie, worrying her parents, who raised an eyebrow.

Something was up with their daughter.

"Steady, now!" Evie told her, and she straigtened up in her presence, readying herself for the adventure to come.

She forced the blush back into the shadowy depths, holding herself together.

Mya could *never* screw this up for herself and Evie, not with the secrets between them or the unsaid words.

*I can do this for her.*

With all else calm, Evie opened the door, and she stepped out, followed by Mya, and then, the door closed behind them.

No going back. The walk was underway.

Mya walked right alongside Evie as they ventured out on the familiar path to Pinelake Park, with Evie staying close to her side, gazing optimistically ahead and looking forward to seeing the color of the park equipment, the call of the forests, the rustle of the leaves in the wind.

Mya had different aspirations, however.

She wanted to *stay* with Evie, *close* to her, the gap between them nonexistent.

Evie's hand was so close to her hand, *so* close...

*I want to hold it.*

At the thought of holding Evie's hand in her own, tenderly and lovingly, Mya shot an affectionate glance at her, admiring her composure and how her chin tapered to the point.

Was Evie the child of a *god*? She was born with everything.

Her smooth skin was so *enticing*... Mya could only imagine the future she'd had if she'd picked up that hand, then grabbed her shoulder, erasing the gap and throwing her face into hers, the passionate kissing-

"Ay, Mya?" Evie snapped at her face with two fingers, breaking the spell she had unintentionally cast. "Are you okay? You just zoned out and have been staring at this house for a minute."

"Uhmmm no no I was... liking the grass! Nice... lawn..." she blurted out awkwardly, her face shruken and blotted in pink and red.

Unlike earlier, Evie did not buy that.

"Is something wrong?" she questioned, seeing her face. "You can tell me if something's going on, I'll listen-"

"Nope, nothing's wrong!" Mya denied, waving her hands around to emphasize her roughly-constructed point.

Evie nodded, though her senses were communicating that Mya's behavior was definitely unusual. The calm, level-headed comedian was growing embarrassed and red-faced.

*This is a more unnerved side... but I don't want to make assumptions. If anything's going on and she doesn't want to tell me, it's common decency to not pry.*

"Okay. Sorry that I asked. Continue?"

"Yes, please!" The two walked ahead, close yet so far apart, and Mya couldn't help but peek at Evie another time.

And the more she did, the more she kept on falling in love.

Am I allowed

To look at her like that?

Careful, curious footsteps were shared against the concrete of the sidewalk. Mya was blindly stumbling about, lost in the mystifying human that was Evie Ly, to Evie just a friend, but to Mya, her crush and the person she so *desperately longed* to be her girlfriend.

Evie was scented like roses and vanilla, built to perfection, and had a mind of superb intelligence so sharp anyone could be *destroyed* by her in a millisecond.

Could it be wrong

When she's just so nice to look at?

Evie glanced at her, and Mya turned away, facing ahead; the second her friend turned away, her head was drawn straight back to her.

The more she stared, the more she felt like it was legal to stare the way she was. It didn't feel so alarming, so... weird.

It was okay for her to do this.

Evie was *beautiful*, and she wanted to admire such a beauty with her own two eyes.

Mya smiled, flashing her white teeth at her, and Evie, noticing the gesture, smiled back and let out a warm sigh.

And she smells like lemongrass and sleep

She tastes like apple juice and peach

*She... she appreciates it! Oh, I love you so much, Evie...*

Mya shuffled closer to her, her hand grazing against Evie's, the contact making her shudder yet yearn for far more.

This was still so very *strange*.

Oh, you would find her in a Polaroid picture

And she means everything to me, oh

The breeze, making its presence known, drifted against the girls' faces and tugged at their hair, sending it into the breeze. Tufts of black hair touched Mya's face, turning her oh-so-giddy, and strands of auburn hair flew into her eyes.

"Pfft, Mya, you look like one of those mop dogs," Evie teased, flicking the strands aside herself, and Mya blushed.

That... that *action*, that display and tease by itself...

*I wish she'd do that to me more often.*

I'd never tell

No, I'd never say a word

Immediately, Mya slipped into her fantasy once again, where she and Evie were together and intimate. She could see Evie touch her forehead to hers, the skin rubbing on her skin and creating the sparks she yearned to feel, the chemistry building. Then a gentle kiss she would plant on her lips would seal the deal, so soft, and sweet...

But the fantasy faded away, and back came to Mya the view of the Piney Woods as they approached Pinelake Park. So close to Evie, but a gap dividing the space between them.

No matter how hard she tried to get closer, wanting to take Evie's hand or graze against her intentionally, needing her to do the same to her, Mya couldn't close it.

The failure left behind a stinging sensation - a tinge of bitter loneliness - and it felt oddly *jolly*.

And oh, it aches

But it feels oddly good to hurt

Evie observed that wide smile and dreamy look in her leaf-green eyes, the jewels that always had a sparkle in the dimmest light, and she laughed. "Someone's become animated," she said, placing her hand on Mya's shoulder.

Mya perked up, her head craned toward her, and the blush returned to her cheeks. "Yeah... I guess I am," she murmured.

Her body and sights continued to be a heavy draw to Evie - she was a magnet, and she was the metal that wouldn't stop trying to break the line keeping them from falling into one another.

Speaking of falling... would it be *illegal* if Mya accidentally fell onto Evie and kissed her again?

Fell into her arms and wanted to be held like a baby?

*These thoughts! Argh! I can't control them! But... but I need Ev to do this, she's the only one I want...*

And she smells like lemongrass and sleep

She tastes like apple juice and peach

The park was across the street now, and Mya saw it, along with their tree, tall and waving at them with quivering branches, in a friendly fashion.

Destiny awaited.

Why not make it more fun?

"Race ya, Evie!" she exclaimed, taking off the street and giving a daft, slightly flirtatious, wink.

"You're on!" Evie missed the flirt attempt, but loved the way her friend had such a comedic attitude.

As Mya bounded off, Evie followed, keeping in pace and dashing across the empty roads onto a sidewalk and soft grass.

Oh, you would find her in a Polaroid picture

And she means everything to me

When she skidded to a halt, she was face to face with a surprised Mya, who's fingers flexed in and out, staring at the near nose-to-nose touch.

*Oh my god... she could have ran into me.*

*Then she could have kissed me, and it would have been one of the most mythical moments of my life...*

*I adore you.*

Oh (Oh, oh)

Oh (Oh)

Fighting the voice that told her not to push it too far, Mya shoved her nose on Evie's, causing *her* to blush, and she fought Evie's hands at her waistline, gripping them firmly and not letting go.

Oh my god, was this *it*? Would Mya let the truth slip and make it official to her own best friend that she loved her more than anyone else, and not just platonically, but *romantically*?

The gap was hers to close. She slid her hands up to her wrists, clasping them and pulling them closer to her, whilst at the same time pressing her forehead against Evie's.

*I could kiss her right now, and the rest would be history.*

*She'd be mine. Then we'd be-*

Oh (Oh, oh)

Oh (Oh)

Suddenly, a voice sliced right through her train of thought.

"Mya, w-what are you doing?"

Startled, Mya pulled away and saw that Evie was *blushing* at her, *bewildered*, her frame tensed up, and she gasped.

*Oh my- oh my god, what was I thinking??? I almost just threw myself onto her without consent!! I...*

*My feelings spiraled out of control!!!*

The fleeting, free-spirited soul that resided in Mya cowered as it was munched upon by a more fragile soul: anxiety and despair.

Frantic, she looked both ways, unable to conceal her embarrassment-red face.

"I'm... I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that, I didn't know what I was doing!" she stammered, tone shaky, and Evie seemed to be concerned.

"Mya... are you sure nothing's wrong? You've been pretty heavily embarrassed by something today..."

"Yes, nothing's wrong!" she pleaded. "I promise, Ev!"

"Are you *sure*?" she asked, gently moving closer to her, that gap erasing and closing, and Mya's feelings surged up to her heart until she wanted to scream at Evie.

But she couldn't.

How *could* she tell her the *truth*?

*Oh, I'm gay and I'm so madly in love with you I could hold you in my arms and shower you in kisses...*

*Ew, that's gross! I have to stop fantasizing about that!*

She must have been out of it for too long, as Evie prodded her in the shoulder, shaking her worriedly, baffled green eyes boring into her conundrum-blessed soul.

"Mya!?"

Mya, gasping, backed away and gulped in fresh late winter air, her eyes stretched wide, staring at Evie, her mouth off its hinges.

She breathed, held still, and didn't *move*.

*What... what's wrong with me??*

She looked at the grass and her shoes, the cells in her brain tugging her, *begging* her to go back and admire her friend, an angel, a savior, a girl so exceptional she stood out from the others...

Voices swirled and trounced in her head, encouraging her to disobey moral code and *throw* herself onto Evie, kissing her and dancing with her, guiding her along to the sound of her beating heart, and the other half told her that she'd ruin her life, humiliate herself, and lose her friend, who'd slam dunk her into the ground and deem her a needy gay freak that was an animal when facing her true feelings.

She covered her head, and her ears, trying to block it all out, but they got louder, and louder, until it was a buzzing, a *cacophany*, until-

"**MYA**!" Evie screamed, gripping her shoulders and shaking her, and Mya, choking, gasped for air and swallowed it down, color returning to her blush-riddled face.

Strong holly eyes pulled her in, soothed her, made her realize that she wasn't drowning and wasn't solitary - Evie was here, her hands on her shoulders. The touch, so prudent, mesmerizing...

Mya was safe. The voices had disappeared, and all in time and space was silent.

Evie had made the nightmare brewing in her head, a nightmare she hadn't heard or properly assumed was happening herself, vanish.

Relieved, Mya gave her a small hug for half a second before backing away, calmly and wriging her hands together. Evie's head tilted to the side, appalled.

"T-Thanks, Ev. I... I'm sorry, really. A personal situation has been going on, and, um, I... I don't wanna talk about it with you right now, okay? When we were walking, it appeared in my head and I couldn't get it out..."

Evie nodded along, trodding up to her, but Mya pulled away.

"Mya, it's okay. I'm not going to harm you," Evie assured, giving her a tempting, reassuring hand.

Mya *yearned* to yank that hand and hold it, trace over every inch of skin with her own, and yet, that wasn't what she wanted.

If she grabbed that hand, her dark, *blissful* temptations would possess her - and she'd shatter Evie and their very friendship.

She brought herself to shake her head briskly.

"I know that, Evie... but this issue has been bothering me... I need some space for a bit, alright? You can sit at a distance from me..."

*Please don't take this the wrong way, I don't want to sever ties with you... I really want you next to me... but this coming out drama, I don't want you to find out.*

*You CAN'T find out!* Mya thought. *Or you'll despise me and leave me in the dust! I... I can't tell you something so jarring as this...*

"Oh, you want space?" Evie surmised. "Okay. I'll sit here."

Giving her a thumbs-up, Evie sat on the concrete step bordering the playground, and Mya took her seat six feet away, covering her face with her hands and retreating into the cave containing her thoughts, worries, and aspirations.

Today had already gotten off to a nettled start - she had been playing give and take with Evie, dragged them across rocks, spaced out and gave Evie a reason to be concerned, and now she had temporarily needed her own best friend to *get away* from her just so she could prevent a monumental *disaster* from occuring - erupting the flaring volcano within her heart that would have picked Evie up, gripped her, and kissed her, letting her gay secrets fly out the window and to Evie.

Mya had crushed on Evie since yesterday. It was *hardcore*. It was a *nightmare*. At times, she felt like the border between reality and fantasy was muffled and fading out.

Her thought process was a house under construction, but it was slow and was taking *forever* putting two and two together to build.

Evie had *never* liked real-life romance. She found it gross and less than appealing. In books, however, she was okay with it.

If Mya had approached her and asked her out, stating, "I'd like for you to be my girlfriend," Evie would have bitterly rejected her and hissed at her that she'd never reciprocate affection, let alone *queer* affection, to her friend.

*She... she wouldn't want a relationship at all! What fool am I for thinking we'd work...*

Mya sighed, sensing the tears that wanted to fall, but she internally yelled at them to stay back.

She *wanted* to have Evie as a romantic partner - full of fire, passion, and young lovers lost in the highs - and faced the mountain-length challenge of if Evie would be open to it, let alone accepting.

Evie liked fictional gays - Aether and Nori in *Aether and the Darkness Falls* - but did she like *real* gays?

*Would she ever view me that way?*

For a moment, Mya's heart prodded at her, pointing her in the direction of Evie, who sat ahead, whistling a tune to herself peacefully, and Mya stared, admiring her and every trait about her.

A heart of iron and a body of metal, covered by softhearted goodness and a more private, secluded, pure heart of gold.

A brain so vast it was an expanse of smarts in every core subject.

Talents perfected to the max so that it appeared she was a perfectionist.

And those *green* eyes, oh, *those* eyes.

Mya, hiding her face, peeked through her fingers and marveled at Evie's figure, which had a sheen in the sunlight, and the blush creeped back onto her cheeks, settling there.

And I'll be okay admiring from afar

'Cause even when she's next to me

We could not be more far apart

Evie did not notice, nor did her gaze flit back to her.

But for Mya, that was okay. She didn't have to notice her secret admirer quietly commending her or see the love drifting off of her in waves.

They weren't close, more far apart than before, and at the same time, next to each other. Six feet apart, but within range.

*All I need to take a flawless, breathless picture of you,* Mya noted.

And she tastes like birthday cake and storytime and fall

But to her, I taste of nothing at all

Finally, Mya's heart swelled, her worries taking their leave, and at long last, the stifling tension was fading.

While she and Evie hadn't been fully transparent, and while she believed that Evie could never think so highly of her, the ground wasn't a landmine now.

Slowly, Mya made her way over to Evie, and she glanced up at her, a pleasant grim forming on her face.

And she smells like lemongrass and sleep

She tastes like apple juice and peach

"You okay?" she asked, leaning closer to her, and sitting down, Mya leaned back, making their shoulders touch beautifully.

"Yeah. I got the baggage off my chest."

"Awesome," Evie murmured, placing a hand on her shoulder, scratching it a little. "And remember, if you're feeling down, rant to me. I'll listen."

Mya nodded, biting back a response. *I wish you would understand, but what I'm going through isn't anything you've seen. I'm not the average girl you believe me to be, Ev...*

Oh, you would find her in a Polaroid picture

And she means everything to me

The two sat there for long minutes, allowing the time to slip by, listening to themselves breathe, their clothing rubbing against each other, cheeks warm and tinged with sunlight.

Mya's doubts and fears had left her. Mostly.

But the question of *how* she'd come out to Evie - and her parents, along with the lesbian-and-proud Winter - was still an open end.

Yes, she means everything to me

Coming out was a *beast* - and she was a petrified young girl, still learning how to accept this *new*, flirty her, these feelings and strange behaviors.

She was a flower learning to grow.

However, in the presence of Evie, Mya felt whole, satisified, and free of strife next to the very person that changed *her* life.

She was scented like flowers, her lips *tasted* like birthday cake and sugary sweets, and oh, how she ached to just have her love her so...

She means everything to me

*You mean everything to me.*

Later, when the sun had called it quits and had sunk behind the treetops composing the Piney Woods, Mya sat down at the dinner table with a plate of lasagna, sticking her fork into the dish and nabbing a piece, sticking it in her mouth.

Mmmm. Delicious.

Her parents, Nita and Patrick, emerged from the kitchen with their plates and also sat down, causing a *clink*.

"So, honey," Patrick said, stuffing his mouth full of lasagna. "How was your day out with Evie?"

Mya stopped eating, the chewed lasagna stuck in her throat. "Erm... it was... fine, to be honest."

"Did you have fun?" Nita questioned, holding her fork.

Recalling their walk, chase, skin on skin and touch, the romantic aspirations Mya was struggling to live alongside surged up to her esophagus and stuck there, unmoving.

*I... cannot tell them...*

"Y-Yeah, we had fun," she replied uneasily, trying to swallow the lasagna and nodding, going to split off another piece to fill her stomach.

"Oh, I'm glad to hear it. You two have always been quite the duo, haven't you?"

Her mother's query was enough to ring *hell's bells*.

Mya stiffened, cheeks reddening, and she swiftly stuck the lasagna piece in her mouth. She was *pleading* with her mother to not prompt her right now; the will to speak had deserted her.

*I... I can't speak about Evie or I'm going to be an embarassment!*

"Be real, Marigold, they're *perfect*!" Patrick purred, eying his wife pointedly. "Evie's intellligence balances out Mya's boisterous nature, and our daughter's jubiliant, comedic nature balances out Evie's tough-as-nails personality."

"Peas in a pod. Awwww, they've grown so much."

Mya gritted her teeth, hearing *nothing* but nails on chalkboard, and making sure she wasn't arousing suspicion, she forced herself to eat and digest more lasagna.

Each time she took a bite, she was putting pebbles and sand into her mouth.

The lasagna she savored tasted like wet sand at the beach.

Oh, and rocks too. Ew.

"Thanks, mom, dad," she thanked reluctantly, swallowing the lumps in her throat, and she shuddered.

"Anytime, sweetheart. We're so proud of how much you've evolved over the years. You've had your faults, but Evie's helped you to see a lot, hasn't she?" Patrick wondered aloud, giving his daughter a convival smile.

She nodded, her teeth gritting harder. "Yeah... Ev... has."

*Please get me out of here! This is embarrassing!*

She crouched low to her plate, hoping to conceal her pink face.

"You know, Pat, Evie's been remarkable lately. Didn't you see the way she defied her own mother? Just to protect Mya? That's some real courage, right there."

"I didn't even know her situation was that bad, really."

*Please shut up!* Mya internally begged. *Please shut up and stop talking about her...*

Shutting her eyes, Mya retreated to her thoughts, her soul longing for a gate that would take her to Elysium, *heaven*, *anywhere* but her house and this conversation.

Yet everywhere she turned, she'd run into a wall made of flesh and alluring, shining skin, hair, and eyes.

Mya could only run into Evie, crash into her and watch as her arms knotted around her back. They'd fall to the ground, accidentally kissing and having their legs tangled up.

*No! I can't... I can feel them coming out!*

Momentarily breaking her sub-consciousness, Mya squealed, and startled, she sat upright, her eyelids peeled back.

Oh my *god*, that was *loud*.

Two pairs of eyes drilled her, and craning her head *painfully*, and with lethargy, Mya saw her parents' expressions.

She had busted their bubble.

"Mya, are you feeling well, hun?" Nita gently asked. "You look pretty sick... was it something in the food?"

Mya was about to shake her head when her father interrupted.

"Hey, Marigold, wasn't she a bit *tremulous* around Evie? Back in the morning and stuff? And when we bring Evie up now, she's quivering..."

Mya, *alarmed* and every bell ringing and going off and sounding her head, backed up, her legs itching and wobbling.

Her parents were *catching on* to her. They were digging and wouldn't stop until they excavated the truth.

They'd be all over her. *Polarizing* her.

The Coming Out Beast wasn't taking any prisoners, and it loomed, threatening to screw Mya from bottom to *top*.

The world was blurring, and reality was slipping out of her fingers. Mya looked at her parents. Then at the ground. Parents. Herself. Parents. Herself.

"Mya, what's going-"

It was at her father's question that everything *fractured*.

"**IT'S NOT ABOUT EVIE**!" she screeched, causing the entire dinner table to rattle and plates to move, and the fork from her hand fell, falling into her dish and *clanking*.

Nita and Patrick were aghast at the outburst and had jumped back in their chairs, anxious and perplexed.

Precisely *what* had caused their daughter - usually so easy-going and chatty - to *lash out* in a fell swoop?

Mya, on the other hand, was unfazed, but upon observing how *shocked* her parents were, she was flooded with guilt, and her breathing spiked.

No, she absolutely couldn't *stand* the dining room, or the living room, or anywhere within striking distance of her.

Without dropping another bombshell, she sped down the hall, to her room, and slammed the door closed, falling to the floor and grasping for something, precious air, breathing and clawing and convulsing.

Her head was *engulfed* in smoke and flames, and her legs were thrashing out as if she had been thrown into a lake and was fighting for her *life*.

She *wanted* someone. *Needed* someone to hold her, rock her back and forth, reassure her it was alright and that the person, her hero, would be here and would wipe all of her worries away.

Mya's heart *throbbed*. That person could *only* be her most renowned, best friend, brimming with integrity and compassion, her charm weaving its way and coiling around her heart...

*I want you, Evie! I just want you... need you...*

Mya *begged* and *pleaded* and screamed, ever so silently, for Evie to bust out her window, dive in, scoop her up, and keep her in her lap, whispering that she was okay. She was perfect. She was her best friend and would protect her. Tickle her silly, rub her chin and let her palm trace from cheekbone to cheekbone...

*I need her to give me hugs and spoil me until I pass out...*

Ten minutes passed, and Mya had gradually recovered, breathing back to normal and legs splayed out. In a way, her fantasies and utmost desires of what she wanted Evie to do to her had sent her falling from hell and back to the land of the living.

Her panic may have subsided, but it still didn't change her outcome and had instead made her suspicious to her parents.

She had nowhere to go and nowhere *near* the guts to attempt coming out - the Beast was waiting for her in the living room and would consume her *alive*.

Her phone was also on her nightstand and resting there, but even then, Evie was *beyond* out of the question. Mya's impulse would override her common sense, which would then make her admit the truth and overwhelm Evie with coming out and love confessions and pleas to be her girlfriend.

Mya had no place and no spare home to retreat to. She was *lost*.

*What have I done to myself...? I'm... I'm not the person I was days ago. I've fallen for my friend, I can't stop CRUSHING on my friend, and I'm gay as utter hell now. I don't know my label and my types. I can't talk to anyone without acting like an idiot who's extremely deranged... and I have no one to vent to.*

*I'm a burden. A freaking burden. A liability no one wanted! Congrats, Mya, you're the most pathetic person to ever exist...*

Mya, peeling off her jacket, threw it onto the end of the bed, and with a sigh full of pain, she flopped onto her bed, grabbed her pillow, threw her face in it, then curled back up into a fetal-like position.

Where was the breakaway she *craved*? The light she sought? She kept falling into a wider, darker, deeper pit, the more her thoughts and professions for Evie marinated, cooked, and blossomed.

She was in love. *Crazy* in love.

So badly in love the only thing she could dream about was Evie undoing her and being a sweet-as-can-be, doting girlfriend.

Mya whimpered hopelessly.

There was no wisp in the dark that would guide her to the truth - her sexual identity, her whirlwind feelings for Evie, and coming out to her parents and Evie and the others in her life.

*I'm useless.*

Who would even *bother* listening to her anyway?

*It'd have to be someone who's able to put up with the nuisance I am...*

Wait.

*Wait a minute*.

Mya sat up.

She was blind as a *bat*.

Of course, she'd rule out her parents and Evie for venting purposes; they were too high risk and could disown her for finding girls attractive or for not being straight.

In the process, she had forgotten the *one* person who *would* listen to every word and help. She was a spitfire and would drop *bombs* if provoked, but inside, she was filled with an untainted heart and a bright, unique spirit.

*Winter*.

Winter was queer - a lesbian, at that - and had come out, even if said coming out had permamently traumatized her. She had spent *much* time exploring herself and whom she presented as in the past when she first discovered her interests were painted in the colors of gay pride.

Now, she was a strong and *defiant* non-conforming lesbian that had a *passion* when it came to loving other girls and her refusal to comform.

*Mya, you fried rat! You should've known!*

*Winter will listen to me! She's gay and she puts up with my stuff long enough! She even likes to hug me now, heh... I have to message her!*

With newfound robustness, Mya yanked her phone off the nightstand, disconnecting its charger and making it fall to the floor. She sat up, opened her contacts, and returned to her DMs with Evie.

*Eeeek!*

Mya was swift to tap out of the DM and into her DM with Winter, reading over the "we need to talk" message from days ago regarding Aiden's visit to her cabin.

*That... was less than a leisurely day.*

Sharply inhaling, she put her fingers to work and typed a simple greeting, submitting it afterward.

*Hey Win*

No reply.

Mya looked out her window at the sunset, which casted red, orange, and pink hues across the sky, creating a beautiful painting, and she brought a smile to her serene face.

Her phone didn't vibrate. Had Winter gone out?

*Buzz*.

Nope. Spoke too soon.

Mya glanced down and saw Winter's reply:

*Hey Mya.*

*Yay, she's here!*

Her feet bouncing off the bed back and forth, Mya typed up a fresh response.

*Um, I know we've barely talked over the phone, but... I really need to chat with you right now.*

Winter typed back just as fast as she had hit enter.

*What? Why? Is something wrong?*

*Yes, and I need your help, because you're really the only person who's going to understand me when I tell you about it...*

Mya began to chew on her lip - a nervous habit she picked up from her father - as she continued. She was praying to the *stars* that Winter would listen and wouldn't think she was going insane.

*Hold up. You're coming to me for advice? I'm... I'm frazzled, the last thing I'd expect you to do is reach out to me. Don't you, um, prefer Evie?*

Mya bit on her lip harder, grunting.

Explaining was going to be a pain in the tail, wasn't it?

*Well, yeah, but... this is too personal for me to tell her. And she might hate me. Winter, I only came to you because you're going to know what I'm telling you like the back of your hand.*

*Please tell me that made sense,* she told herself.

Her phone vibrated, indicating another reply from Winter.

*Well, okay, I'll try and help, though I'm no expert. Putting that out there for an fyi. So... can you give me a basic outline of what's going on?*

Mya, swallowing down the rocks remaining clumped in her throat, fired away.

*So, recently, I went to Geiger Heights with Ev, and it was meant to be a really sweet picnic... but I got us in trouble and trapped in... someone's property.*

*You DID WHAT*

Mya snorted. That was expected.

*Yeah. I'm a dumbass, I get it. Evie was pissed with me and we went our separate ways for a while, but I began to feel incomplete without her... and then, I started to succumb to the darkness of where I was, and the door to the room I was in got locked.*

*You're... sure you're not on drugs, Mya?*

*I wish I was tripping that day.*

*Damn... so how did you get out?*

Mya could feel her fingers shake, but she trudged on, keeping on. Winter *had* to know.

*Evie kicked the door aside. Her strength is unreal. I ran into Ev, hugged her, but I tripped and fell...*

Winter replied in a heartbeat. *Goodness, were you okay man???*

*Yes, I wasn't hurt. But...*

*But what?*

Mya steadied herself, knowing she couldn't stop this conversation and give in.

*I kissed Evie.*

Although Winter was far away, her next response made it clear to Mya that she was listening - and that she was with her all the way.

*You fell onto Evie and kissed her??? OH MY GOD*

*I know!! It was an accident but it happened and here we are...*

*Okay, you kissed her on accident. How did Evie react?*

*She... she dismissed it as not meaningful and brushed it off. I was terrified. I thought Ev was gonna hate me.*

Mya flopped on her stomach, resting more comfortably on her cold bedsheets.

*I doubt Evie would hate you for an accident, Mya. She has far more patience than I do. And beyond her surface is someone who sees the purity in you.*

*Well, Winter, that's not the issue I'm having...*

*Oh? Do tell me more.*

Mya gulped, grabbing one of her pillows and squeezing it in and out. She held her phone tightly and didn't let it fall.

*We had a pretty touchy reunion. But after the kiss, when the picnic wrapped up... all these feelings welled up in my heart.*

*Feelings? What kind?*

*Winter... please don't try stabbing me through the phone when I say this, okay?*

*I'm not in the mood for stabbing Mya LOL but go on*

Mya composed herself. After this, Winter would know everything she had been struggling to conceal, and she'd know about the unbridled affection for Evie she had.

It was better safe than sorry.

Evie couldn't possibly know a word - but someone else could.

Mya typed away and submitted the truth in less than a minute.

*I... I wanted Evie to hold me, touch me... I wanted her to be the only one that did that to me. She makes me feel weightless. She evokes these strange feelings in me. And... I WANT Evie to kiss me. Not accidentally. Willingly. I can't stop thinking about her! Everything about her!*

First message down, one to go.

*Winter... I have a crush on Evie. I'm gay.*

Second message down.

Mya tensed, preparing for Winter's reaction to her friend's coming out. This was her *first* coming out to anyone close with her, and it wasn't her parents or Evie.

Had she done it right?

Would Winter fly through the door to her bedroom and hold her at knifepoint?

*Buzz*.

*Please don't kill me please don't kill me please don't kill me-*

Mya saw the message.

Her heart... skipped a few beats?

*OMG you're queer?? You LIKE-like Evie??*

*Yes, is that a problem with you?*

*Mya, you adorable dork! No! I'm so happy for you!* Winter replied jovially. *Congratulations on coming out!! It's not an easy affair, I'll say that. It takes a lot of guts and soul to do such a thing.*

*You're not mad at me?*

*Mya, I'm literally gay myself. You're my best friend, of course I'd support you through this! I'm so proud of you, dude. So Evie's your dream girl, hmm?*

Mya blushed. *I didn't expect her to be... but she is. She's everything I've ever wanted. Each time I think about her, I fall more in love... her physique is attractive, the way she talks is attractive, the way she melts me is perfect! I want her to consistently undo me. Is that... normal?*

She looked to her left. Was that too weird?

She then stared down just as Winter responded.

*Pfft, Mya, it's normal to feel that way about your crush! Especially your first. When I tell you I felt that way about Daniela, I did. The feelings took a lot of time to formulate, but they did. There were a lot of things I loved about Dani - she was profoundly intelligent, loved having private time with me, had the sweetest smile and a crown of innocence on her head. The night she came out and asked me out was very special.*

Mya sighed in relief. Winter had experienced those same feelings, perhaps more toned down, when she began to fall in love with Daniela and date her in secret.

*Still surprised Daniela wasn't an evil brat and actually could develop affection for someone like Winter in past times,* she thought to herself.

*So you understand what I'm saying?* she typed.

*Yep. Completely.*

Mya smiled and let out a small giggle, excited.

Harmony flooded through her veins. Her first coming out was a success! Winter was proud of her, and although she was no expert, her presence over the phone was something she truly needed to have.

So she moved on and kept typing, fingers spouting flames.

*Were you possessive of Dani? I... I get defensive around Evie, want no one around her but me.*

Winter replied swiftly.

*No, not really, I admired her heavily. I didn't sense that Dani was in imminent danger and didn't feel a need to overly protect her until later. Though, as this is your first time being so madly in love, I don't blame you for being a tad possessive.*

Mya nodded, thinking of what she wanted to say next - but Winter beat her to it.

*Have you told your parents yet?*

She paused. Her parents.

The two on her list of people she *refused* to come out to.

How would her parents, who had raised her for thirteen years and hadn't seen her share a *scrap* of affection for the same gender, react?

They were supportive and warmhearted, sure, but it didn't mean dark intentions were lurking beneath - just like what happened with Winter's father, Edwin McCormick.

*No... I've been dreading telling them,* she told Winter. *I'm paranoid they're going to reject me. They don't know I like girls! I've never loved a girl until Evie and... idk. I really don't know.*

*Okay. That's a rational fear. Have you told Evie?*

*Hell no!* Mya fired back. *Winter, I... can't. I can't tell Evie I'm gay! What if she picks up on the fact I'm deadpan lusting for her??? And she despises romance that's not in a book! She'll think I'm a clown and think I'm pulling us out of the friendzone for love bullcrap...*

Sullen, Mya shut her eyes for a second, but was interrupted with the buzz of her phone.

Another Winter reply.

*Mya, easy. Calm down. You're not lusting, you're going through the motions of having your first crush. You don't have to tell Evie straightaway! And you most certainly don't have to ask her out ASAP - take the time you need to process your feelings and calm them. Coming out in a rampage is going to make the whole thing messy.*

Mya took a few deep breaths and replied.

*Oh, phew. Thanks. I think I'm going to steer clear of Evie for a little while, not to avoid. But I can't be around her. Not 'til I learn to curb what I feel for her. I don't want to pull the trigger and blow everything up between us.*

*That's a good idea,* Winter responded. *Breaks in relationships have their benefits. You'll feel better given some days or so.*

*I don't wanna give Evie the wrong impression of me.*

*You won't, believe me.*

*Will she see me differently?*

*Very little. She'll see the you you've always been. But remember, you don't have to come out now - you can come out whenever you feel ready. I'll be here supporting you. Though, it feels strange saying that, I don't mean to be your therapist XD*

*Oh, Winter! I'm giddy-go-lucky you're helping me with this. I... I feel a lot more settled down, and you listening to me has honestly made my night... you're pretty great at handing out advice.*

*Damn you! You're flattering me... \*clears throat\* anyway. Back to topic. Do you know what orientation you fall under?*

This left Mya puzzled. There were many sexual orientations, *very* many, stretching across a vast spectrum. So many options, one to choose.

What *was* she? Bisexual, in love with two genders? A lesbian like Winter, only wanting to fall in the loving arms of a woman?

The choices were *endless*. She whimpered.

*No... I haven't even given it much thought.*

*Would you like for me to help you narrow it down?* Winter offered a minute later. *I won't do it if you're uncomfortable.*

*No, Win, I'd appreciate it. Please help!* Mya begged.

*Reaching out to Winter was an amazing idea! She's been such a help and so freaking patient... and she's actually taking me seriously!* Mya thought.

She smiled and let out a peaceful sigh. The next time she was seeing Winter in person, it would be hugs all around.

Her phone buzzed. Winter had started their mini QNA.

*Alright. Question 1 - are girls the only gender you're attracted to?*

That was an easy question.

*Undecided. I don't know if it's just girls I'm into,* she responded.

*Okay, fair enough. Question 2 - have you ever gotten intimate or pretty close to a guy? Crushed on him?*

Mya's heart fluttered, and gasping at the question, she dropped her phone.

Yes, there *was* a guy she was in love with ages ago! A guy whom she had adored and laughed at!

A guy who mutually crushed on her as she did to him.

And he was *stinking cute*.

Benji Figglebarker.

Mya had first met the small, button-nosed and chocolate-brown curly-haired Benji when she was in a boutique at the Pineshadow Outdoor Mall. She knew she was smitten off the bat; Benji had a certain appeal around him that sucked her right in.

When their parents had been busy shopping for clothes for them, the two had sat under an awning and bonded over their love for animals, forests, the simple things in life, and Mya's humor.

Ever since that day, the two had been inseperable. Mya had fallen fast, and so had Benji. The two began to send so many text messages every single day that they had to charge their phones repetitively.

Were they addicted? No. Were they young lovers doing stuff young lovers did? Hell yeah.

Benji was always formal and never did anything she didn't want to do. He respected her, treated her royally, giggled at the unfunniest of humor, and always allowed Evie into their fun when she hung out with them.

Soon, friendship flowered into love, and Mya and Benji professed their feelings. But as they were young, they didn't feel *ready* for a relationship. Mya wanted to be friends.

And Benji wanted to be friends too.

The two still hung out on the regular, sharing funny jokes and being intimate with the occassional touch, in love, but just platonically.

Then, near a chilly fall season, Benji had moved out to Seattle and away from Pineshadow; his parents quested for more money-making job opportunities, and he had no choice but to go with them.

Since that day, Mya hadn't seen him in person. It had been *months* since she last thought about him or dwelled on him, missing him.

Now that Winter had brought up men, however, she could feel those feelings return. What she felt for Benji.

She *had* been attracted to men before. And some men she passed by *were* cute and peaked her interest.

*Men can be beans, shining perspective on it... and so can girls.*

She sighed contentfully, a starstruck look crossing in her leaf-green eyes, and she typed furiously.

*Yeah, I did have a crush on this cute boy back in the day. His name's Benji. Small, curly-haired, strawberry nose and civil. Very polite and kind. We did have big crushes on each other back in the day, but we chose to remain friends. Thinking about him now makes me think about some men I've encountered, and... ngl, I find them attractive just like girls are to me.*

Oh boy, was Winter going to like hearing about Benji? She wasn't entirely thrilled around men.

*Buzz*.

*Aww, Ben sounds like someone who'd totally fit your type, Mya. So, feelings for both genders? That tells me what I need so I can chop the list down for you. Ready?*

*Mhm,* Mya replied.

Winter responded fast, and Mya's heart leaped.

*Alright. In conclusion, you most likely fall under these two sexualities: bisexual or pansexual. Obviously, you know what bisexual is, but about pansexual, it means you're also attracted to people who identify as they/them. Though they/them is also included within bisexuality as well.*

Mya's eyes dilated. How was Winter so incredibly *wise* at gay types and labels? She was a *supernatural*!

*How are you so damn amazing at this Win??*

*Hun, I thought I was transgender for ages before identifying as a lesbian haha. It's a very challenging environment and process and it will take time for you to grapple with what you're feeling and thinking properly. It is NOT easy. You might not even fall under the labels I mentioned.*

*You've blown my mind, Winter! Really,* Mya texted back, smiling and showing her teeth even if Winter was all the way in the Piney Woods and wasn't seeing her in person.

*When should I come out?*

Winter instantly replied. *When you feel ready to come out of the closet and express yourself as gay. Take a while to think about what you want to say and what you identify as. Relish in it, roll in it, and DON'T hate yourself. Being queer is a blessing (which father hated, apparently). Mya, you have more opportunities than I did in terms of coming out. No one's pressuring you and no one is going to force the truth prematurely.*

*And I won't lose everyone I love?*

*Dead in the water certain. Your parents will appreciate you, and once your hormones chill, Evie too. Your life isn't going to break apart like mine.*

Mya inhaled, taking in Winter's words and letting them melt inside. She was so *confident* in her friend, her new identity, whatever it was, and that she'd be accepted, never to have a fate like hers.

She wouldn't be discarded and left to die.

She'd *flourish*.

*Can I do this?*

*You can, my friend. I have faith. Oh, if it helps, try using the media to guide you. There's many queer actresses, actors, singers, etc out there. Like Varien <3*

*Had a feeling you'd bring him up.*

*Never forget he guided me, adorable dork.*

Mya, laughing, laid back on her bed, texting a short and sweet *thank you* to Winter before shutting her phone off and putting it back on her nightstand. She crossed her arms daintily over her chest, gazing up at the ceiling of her room.

Lots was to be thought about tonight, but she was headed into the light.

Winter had been an unexpected weaver in the fading wind, the lantern in the mist she had *needed*.

The path was clear and unbroken.

Mya, though, knew she had to make decisions. *Important*, *crucial* decisions that had a *chance* to change her future.

What did she fall under?

How would she tell her parents?

How would she keep tabs on her rampaging, wild love hormones and confess to Evie that she wasn't just attracted to men, but women, individuals that could bring pink splotches over her face?

*Where do I stand? Am I bisexual? There's Benji, and I crushed on him for a long time. He's cute... still sounds cute. But Evie's stolen my heart, captured it, is eating into it. She's so attractive...*

*I don't know what she does, but it's everything. The way she moves, trots along, speaks, every detail HAS me spun in webs. I can't get her off my mind. I don't want her to leave my mind. That touch... I miss it. I must feel her skin against mine again...*

*I miss the taste of Evie's lips... but I can't just earn an accidental kiss the way I did. Would I feel the same if Benji had ever kissed me? Ugh!*

Winter was so damn accurate when she said it would be complicated. Mya's thoughts were spaghetti strands scattered and tangled up everywhere in her brain.

She had crushes on a guy and a girl, one of which, Evie, was more powerful and trance-inducing than the other, the young and mutual Benji.

*It's down to two. I'm bi or I'm pan. I like two genders.*

*Gotta grasp these feelings. I have to think.*

As Mya shut her eyes and retreated to her mindscape, dwelling on this and that and thinking of the endless possibilities, time slipped by, minutes, around two hours of her laying there, uninterrupted, hard at work finding her way through a labyrinth she had entered the second her lips had locked onto Evie's.

She clawed through vines, swam through a sea of sharks and crocodiles, and dodged temples and ruins.

Finally, she reached the center of the final temple, where the grand prize awaited her. She touched a golden substance that coated her in shimmering sparkles, and then-

*Ding*.

Eureka.

Mya gasped, bolting upright. She had figured it out!

All that thinking, untangling, and processing was *worth it*.

She knew, knew in her beating, thriving heart, who she was.

Who she wanted to *be*.

Who she wanted to hug and kiss.

Who's hand she wanted to hold.

She had thought about the genders she was interested in - men and women - they/thems didn't quite stick out as much to her.

That was okay.

With Benji, she had felt something soft, short, and sweet. Like a chocolate cake.

With Evie, she had felt something *powerful*. Promising. Inviting. Unintentionally *seductive*.

It wasn't cake, it was *fire*. A chocolate cake, tart and covered in *spice*.

Both genders were as equally appealing, and Mya wouldn't hesitate if she was offered them to kiss, taste another human's lips and relish in the taste. A kiss with a man or woman was all she wanted.

Staring out her window, Mya gripped her fists and flooded with *conviction*.

"I'm bisexual," she whispered. "I'm bi. I'm *bi*."

Mya was bisexual.

The word kept floating around her head, pinging here and pinging there, as she picked up her phone and reread her DMs with Winter, smiling at their interactions, Winter's wisdom, and her creative wit she had handed to her throughout their conversation.

Mya would definitely be sending her some images as a gift later - her last activity was marked as an hour ago, meaning she had likely gone outside or had gone to sleep.

*Thank you, Winter,* she whispered internally, shining with gratitude and a sense that she belonged. Her heart swelled like an overinflated balloon, and she didn't care if it burst from the excess, imaginary helium.

She was happy, in this moment young, high on life, and safer within her own body. She may not know what her future held or how she was going to admit to her parents and Evie that she wasn't straight no more, but she would find a way in time, figure out the words she *wanted* to say, and be the *person* she always was - but even fruitier.

*Fruity. That fits me.*

She looked down at herself, then at her art desk, the place where'd she draw her art and complete her homework.

Her senses were abuzz with activity and tugged her to it. Her hands went over a small box and opened it - a pin set she had gotten from Michaels months ago, but hadn't gotten around to using.

*Hey... I could make a bi pin for my backpack! That'd be dope!*

Remembering Winter's style notebook, Mya got to work, clearing the desk off and pulling out a white, undecorated pin. She then pulled out her set of many colored markers, pulling the pink, purple, and blue colors she needed.

She took the cap off the pink and was just about to touch the marker to the pin when suddenly...

*Knock knock*.

"Mya?"

*Crap!* Mya slammed the cap into the pink marker and shoved the other markers behind a nook in the desk, leaving the barren pin and approaching the door. That voice was her *father's*.

She had been in her room for *hours* and had ate half of her dinner. Her parents were probably *worried to death* about her!

And what excuse would she come up with to appease them?

Her shoulders raised, she crept over to the middle of her bedroom, quiet and under wraps.

"Yes, dad? You can come inside," she invited tautly, keeping her frame on guard. If her father had *somehow* heard her whispery declaration of bisexuality, she had to be ready.

Patrick, pushing the door ajar, crept in, his hands behind his back. He stared at her, his brown eyes tender, yet mouth curved in a frown.

"What's going on?" Mya asked.

"Darling... Nita and I have been concerned for you. Since dinner. When we brought up Evie, you seemed to be... *very* uncomfortable and stiff. You looked like we had made you *sick*. Is... is everything alright?"

Mya didn't meet his eyes and faced the floorboards. Her parents had caught her red-handed soaking in humiliation for Evie, the person she was so *resolutely* having a dilemma over, the person she was in *love* with and wanted to hold and kiss with all her life.

*She's what I want.*

"I got stressed out," she admitted, her voice retreating to a mouse-like form that came out of shelter only when she was in a crisis.

"Is there a problem in your friendship with Evie?" Patrick prompted, kneeling down and putting a hand on her shoulder lovingly.

She shook her head. Of course not! Evie couldn't do anything wrong. Not *ever*. She never took advantage of their friendship for her own gain or demonized Mya.

"No..."

"Do you want to tell me what's happened, baby?"

Mya stared at the ground again, in her body tremors and shocks rattling her lungs and heart.

Her father was digging for something to explain his daughter's atypical, flustered actions and behavior. She couldn't fumble for an excuse...

...and how could she *lie* to him? Like Evie, Mya *hated* lying. She did it when she was younger and learned the consequences.

*When you lie, that lie grows until you can't manage it. It chokes you. Squashes you like a boot to a spider.*

*I can't lie to my dad about Evie!*

Winter's text messages then returned, slashing across her worries with a two-pronged blade.

*You can come out whenever you feel ready.*

*Dead in the water certain. Your parents will appreciate you.*

She squared her feet.

*Whenever I feel ready, my parents will love me.*

She brought herself to hold her chin up, her leaf-green eyes connecting to her father's brown, his gentle smile that had formed in the wake of his daughter's first admission, and she moved closer.

There was determination in her heart, clear air in her lungs, and an air of satisfaction, responsibility, and *pride* in her veins.

Yes. It was time.

Evie and the feelings, the hormones, the desires were conflicting and random and *driving*.

But her parents - who treasured her, admired her, pushed her to succeed, and lifted her up when she was down, urging her to go high instead of go low - would *listen*.

Joy. Pride. Passion.

Winter was right.

So, Mya stepped forward, the mouse in her banished to the shadow realm.

"Get mom," she commanded. Patrick nodded, going to the door.

"Marigold!" he called. A minute later, Nita came inside her bedroom, fretfully crossing her arms.

"Mya... honey, what's going on?" she inquired, and with the eyes of an eagle, Mya stared straight ahead.

"So... dinner. You caught me embarrassed, blushing, and heating up... I got overwhelmed and had to pull myself away."

"Why?"

Mya sighed, broadening her chest.

"Truthfully, what you saw of me at dinner *wasn't* a side of me you've seen before. Things haven't been... the same since Cracklog Manor. What you *saw* in that outburst I exchanged was connected to Cracklog and the picnic at Geiger Heights..."

"Sweetheart, can you elaborate?" Patrick requested gingerly.

Mya nodded. "Cracklog, to put it bluntly, *changed me*. Sitting in that room, by myself, it made me think about the years of torment I've faced. From bullies. It made me think of what I had done wrong that day. I almost made Evie want to *kill me* because of my naivety. And... when I thought about the possibility of Ev *hating me*..."

She paused, balling up two fists, and she grunted.

"Keep going, Mya. We're listening to you," Nita urged, sitting on her bed.

Seeing her so avid, Mya made herself continue on.

"I saw my flaws in Cracklog. I couldn't keep acting naive. Couldn't put my ambitions above the concerns of my own friend. Then, before Evie came and got me, I... I began to feel... *odd*. All these random feelings, warm and dizzying, coursed through me."

Nita and Patrick glanced at each other, the words their daughter speaking the equivalent of much nail-biting.

Exactly *what* was she describing to them?

"When Evie reunited with me, it was happily ever after. But... you didn't get the whole story from me. There's *one* detail I omitted from you two, and I've been extremely *scared* to say it out loud - I don't wanna look like a bastard-"

"Oh, Mya, you're not that ugly ass word!" Nita stated, surprising her. "Don't say that, darling. You have no reason to be scared around us. We're your parents, and we *are* listening."

Mya dipped her head in acknowledgement, soothed by the promising, respectful tone of her mother, and holding her waistline, she marched forward.

Jettisoning her fears and phobias of coming out down where the sun didn't shine, she didn't cry and didn't crumble as she stared her parents dead in the eye and dropped bombshell number one.

"I kissed Evie."

"You did **what**???" her parents echoed in unison, shock aligned in their faces.

"Accidentally. But I fell onto her and kissed her for a moment before I tore myself off. Evie didn't think of it as much, but..."

She trailed off, the moment she had been *dreading* almost at the door, and she could see the Coming Out Beast lurking in the corner of her bedroom, in its final form and teeth eager for a young girl's suffering.

Her breathing became denser, the words beginning to drift into a stormy sea.

"Mya, you're doing great," Patrick praised, giving her two thumbs up in approval and flashing his teeth. "Keep going. We're listening to you."

Mya nodded and took a step closer to her parents.

The Beast also approached, but Mya glared at it, summoning lightning bolts and maelstroms and tornadoes.

*No, Beast. You won't win today.*

*I let you grow because my fears of coming out overshadowed my pride. But that stigma is gone. Cower before me, fool!*

Allowing herself to inhale a long gulp of air, Mya stood tall, proud, and *assertive*.

"When I kissed Evie, those feelings that I had bloomed and sprung up *everywhere*. They were powerful, and when I left the manor, I was pulled back to Evie each time. When I see her smile, her eyes, her body, it's *utopia*. I could never have *anyone else* more significant and extraordinary than her!

"I don't care what you think. I *admire* Evie. *Love* her. She's *my crush* and I will always, truly, have my *eyes* on her and how she *always* brings a smile to my face. I *like* to kiss guys *and* girls. Say what you will, but... I'm bisexual!"

*Hot damn*. The Beast screamed, rolled on its back, clambered to its oversized paws, and hit the back *door*.

Mya's parents had been *shell-shocked* by their daughter's confessions, and she stood before them, on cloud nine and never to come back down.

*Holy... I did it! I came out!*

She faced her parents, who eyed her, astonished.

Silence filled the room.

Breaking it, Mya said, "Yeah, I'm bi. And I'm in love with my best friend. Strange, isn't it-"

"Oh, congratulations, baby! That's *wonderful*!" Nita exclaimed, sweeping her into a hug and swinging her off the ground, with Patrick doing the same.

"What? You aren't going to flip the tables on me?" Mya questioned in stunned disbelief, eying her parents pointedly, in awe, in... serenity.

"No, silly. Mya, we're so *happy* that you're in love again! Love is a *persuasive* force. We'd *never* reject you for loving who *you* want to love! I don't care if you kiss a guy or a girl, and Patrick doesn't care either - we *want* the best for you, sweetness! To see you discuss Evie with us so passionately and to see you maturing and understanding these new feelings... oh, we're just so *proud* of you!!!"

"Really?" she asked, beaming and ascending, spawning the wings of an angel.

"Yes!" Patrick declared, hugging his daughter and planting a kiss on her forehead. "Coming out isn't a thing you master in a few days, but the fact that you faced it *head-on* and found courage to tell us is *remarkable*. You're a very special young lady, and we will most *certainly* support you and your relationship with Evie, wherever it heads. Speaking of which, it was your feelings earlier that caused the disruption at dinner, wasn't it?"

Shakily, Mya gave a nod. "You mentioned her and I swelled up... I fantasized about her kissing me, hugging me, touching me... it couldn't stop..."

Immediately, the feelings returned, and she found herself standing in a black pit, thousands of mirrors surrounding her, each one a reflection of Evie in her natural beauty.

Long, shoulder-length black hair, pale skin, adorable freckled cheeks, chin tapered to *perfection*, and tactful, expansive dark, holly-green eyes.

*My heart still longs for you.*

Patrick snapped his fingers, erasing the thought and bringing her back to present day. "You'll gain more control over your hormones and thoughts over time. As your mother said, love is a unique gift and drives you to action, calls you to it. Come full maturity, and your feelings will be curbed, no rough edges to be seen."

"That's what Winter told me," Mya murmured, and Nita looked surprised.

"So it was *Winter* that steered you on the right path?" she asked, and her daughter nodded, letting her proceed.

"Well, I'll be damned, she's a thousand percent correct. You'll keep maturing as the days go on, and soon, your feelings won't be overwhelming. It's not weird to feel what you dream about when you picture Evie - her touching you and you desiring another kiss is *normal*. Don't sweat. It's part of growing up and realizing where your interests lay as you grow older."

"Yeah." Mya agreed and sat down next to her mother, leaning on her shoulder.

Scratching her on her head and ruffling her bangs, Nita held her chin with her long, thin hand. "Your bisexuality isn't in any way a burden, Mya. It's a *blessing*. Me and Pat are so *proud* of you right now for developing the will to come out to us about your feelings for Evie *and* what you're feeling and thinking. You could date a man and kiss him, or a girl and kiss her, or Evie and have *her* kissing you. You could run off with someone spectacular. No matter what, we're here for you. And we *will* be cheering you on every step of the way."

"Just don't run off with a *bad* guy or girl. The *dangerous* ones. You don't want your room to become a prison cell, don't you, Mya?"

"Oh, Patrick, don't say things like that!" Nita huffed, batting him on the cheek. "Ignore him, Mya. He's trying to play you."

"I know, mom." Rolling her eyes, Mya let her parents hug her again, and she filled with their warmth, love, admiration, and honesty.

She'd have to steal a debit card and buy so many gifts for Winter at this point. She had proved to be correct - coming out *could* be a beast, but it could also be a blessing and *euphoria*.

Now her *parents* knew her orientation, the person she wanted to become, and the *infuatation* she had for kissing boys, kissing girls, going both ways, and more importantly, wanting to make Evie *hers*.

Phase two was done. The world opened up and became bigger, sound and color returned, and Mya could take in the beauty again.

However, one final obstacle was in her way, and it was *the* big one, big as a tidal wave, powerful as the bite of a great white shark.

Coming out to *Evie*.

Her aspirations ran wild, untamed, like spirits among the stars. They *refused* to be tamed.

Until she was the one in *control*, she couldn't be around Evie or let her secret out - that had to wait.

Winter had told her to do so, as that way, her coming out wouldn't be messy and damaging.

*The last thing I want is for Evie to reject me because I embarrassed her.*

*And I don't want to EVER shove Evie away again. Not after Cracklog.*

The writing glowed on the wall, and shadows formed in the patches of light on the room.

Yes. Challenges awaited. But Mya would face them, the coward in her buried ten feet under.

Nita and Patrick shifted, moving her thoughts back to the real world, and getting up, they approached the door.

Nita turned to face her. "When you decide to tell Evie that you're gay, we're going to support you through it. But... you made this night special for us, Mya. You're a *star*, sweetness. A *shining* star."

Mya sniffed, swelling and inflating so much she became the balloon her heart already was.

"Thank you," she said, and then, the door was closed.

That night, as Mya curled into her blankets and slept soundly, she dreamed of her dream girl, hoping she'd meet her at the equator and kiss her in the dark, letting in the daylight.

*If you don't care, I don't care, Evie.*

*When we collide, we'll paint the night skies, and we'll be out after midnight.*

After a restful night's sleep, Mya prepped for school the next morning. Her bi pin was still incomplete and had been left out on her art desk, plain, the markers messily shoved aside. She'd get back to it later - and preferably when Evie wasn't in her bubble.

Speaking of Evie, Mya, heeding Winter's advice on gaining personal space, had insisted to her decently-surprised friend that she needed some space for the time being, citing the "personal issue" from the park, which she had bought and nodded.

*She was so cool about it too... but she still can't know the truth. I'm not ready to flaunt being bisexual to her yet.*

For the rest of the school day, they didn't speak and kept themselves at a distance, not getting close, not walking together, earning eyebrows from her classmates, but she didn't care. Not like their opinions were seismic anyway.

Even Daniela had been silent, a rarity for the child from hell.

School had breezed by without a hitch, without questions, and without her or Evie being prompted on the gap built between them.

Whew.

Flinging herself through the front door of home, Mya trotted to her bedroom and set her backpack down beside her bed, fishing inside for her math homework, which she retrieved and set down on her art desk.

Functions. Not Mya's strong suit in math.

*Oh well. Let's get this done...*

She got to work. Although she wasn't the superior student of intelligence in math (that title belonged to Evie), she was okay at this topic and got it done in thirty minutes.

Upon stuffing the piece of paper in her backpack, she glanced at the blank bi pin in front of her and held it, tracing its circular edges.

She had plenty of time before dinner, why not design it now?

Smiling, Mya plucked her pink, blue, and purple markers out of their holder, pressing the tip of the pink down and drawing a line, repeating said process for the second and third line.

Fifteen minutes skidded by, and Mya, holding the pin in the palm of her hand, thought highly of the small wonder, which shined brightly and painted a deeper picture of her.

*Three colors, a part of what makes me whole. You, little pin, mean a lot to me.*

She kneeled down, attaching the pin to her backpack.

Another task complete.

Sauntering over to her colorful bed, dappled in shades of pink, she flopped onto her mattress and grabbed her phone, entering her DMs with Winter and sending her an image of fluffy kittens giving each other a lick.

She responded a minute later. *STOP YOU'RE MAKING ME CRY WHILE I LISTEN TO VARIEN*

*What song?*

*VALKYRIE II*

*They can be bleach ig???*

*FAIR ENOUGH*

Laughing at Winter's anguish-filled text and overexaggerations, Mya scrolled through the rest of her contacts.

*Parents. Evie. Winter, PMS help tipline...*

She then saw a number below the PMS help tipline, and cocking her head, she remembered who it belonged to.

*Benji!*

When was the last time Mya had even *called* her former crush? It was months ago and she hadn't checked in since then.

And a *lot* had changed.

*Maybe I should catch Ben up on what's going on...*

Pressing the number, Mya opted to go for speaker and tapped the button that enabled it.

Her heart beat faster, and she curled her fingers in and out.

Two minutes passed.

Was Benji going to pick up?

Out of the blue, a voice sounded through the phone. "Uh, hello?"

"Ben-Ben!" Mya greeted excitedly.

"Oh, hi My-My!" he greeted back, and Mya gasped, amazed.

"Whoa, did you hit *puberty*??? You sound so handsome!"

"Yep, I did, but the curls and freckles have stayed the same. How's it been going for ya?"

"Fine, mostly," Mya replied. "Getting through school, passing my eight classes, trying new things, reaching new heights, and I'm bisexual-"

*I DID WHAT??*

Mya gasped, clasping her hands firmly over her mouth. Oh god, she had just come out to Benji with no warning whatsoever!

She blushed, bracing for Benji's reaction - he didn't expect *this* on his bingo card.

"Hold onnnn Mya, you're bi??"

"Erm, uhh... yeah... I'm bi. Sorry for not giving you a warning in advance. I like men and girls, and there's this *really* pretty girl I'm in love with..."

Benji let out a thoughtful "Hmm..." and clapped his hands together.

"Wanna tell?"

"Sure. It's... it's Evie."

*Snort*.

"*Ha*! I knew it!" Benji exclaimed, startling Mya, who gasped again.

Benji *knew*? All *along*? But how? He had been out of her life for *months*.

"Oops, I made you go silent. Mya, this might be a tad awkward to admit, but... your chemistry with Evie was *significant*. More so than our relationship. I saw the connection between you two, the way you hugged, locked gazes, spoke... the love's *always* been there. You get close, it blooms. It doesn't die."

Mya's mouth fell *open* as the deadpan shock crept in.

"You're telling me I was *always* meant to fall for Ev???" she fired back, rolling so that she was belly-up on her bed.

"Pfft. Mya, we had *our* moments together. We got close, hugged, found each other's weak spots, played games, took walks... we did that. We fell for each other. But when Evie came into the picture, she jutted out in prevelence. She has everything you saw in me, but *finer*."

"What do you mean?"

Benji giggled. "Sure, I have a cute appearance and Evie's more straightforward and to the point. Yet, Evie has a desirable composure... she's *star-studded* and *successful*. You don't think I've heard her mention how her mother considers her to be a *prodigy*? That's *raw, pure talent* speaking numbers!"

Mya blushed at the mention of her talent, something which Evie scored high marks in.

"Y'know... she's flawless too. She can't do anything wrong. And even if she did, she'd work to atone for that mistake, heal the one she hurt... she did that with me."

"Behind Evie's exterior look is where her empathy truly lies," Benji commented as if he was examining a piece of very fine china. "You might not realize how much she cares for you, My-My. In her heart is someone who will *willingly* do things she despises to please you. She wouldn't let you down not even if life was hell."

Mya concurred in agreement. "Yeah, you're right. And, when I think about Evie, I think about how soft her skin is, how sleek her hair is, how her eyes radiate warmth and kindness and this *seductive* charm, the freckles that break up her cheeks, the muscle she has, how adorable she is with her glasses... god, I'm off the deep end."

"Perhaps, but you're in love again, and the feelings are stronger than before," Benji pointed out. "Nonetheless... I'm so happy for you, Mya. You deserve someone that holds you in esteem and gives love back to you - Evie's the perfect crush."

"More than I could ever dream," she murmured dreamily, eyes crossing with stars.

"Have you come out to Ev yet?"

Mya *froze*.

Oh god. Oh no.

Benji brought up the *one* topic, the *cursed* topic, she had wanted to *so* desperately *avoid*.

Coming out to the person she had tripped over her own feet for.

*Wha... what do I say??? That I can't come out because my feelings are too overzealous??*

Her silence was enough to give the basic outline to Benji, who immeidately replied back.

"You haven't, have you?" he questioned formally, his mature voice softening, and Mya lost the tension that had made her shoulders erect.

Benji wasn't trying to pry and wasn't demeaning her. He was helping to *guide* her.

Like Winter had.

*Months have passed and he's still sweet Ben, but wiser and... dead accurate.*

"I... I haven't. I don't want to."

"Why? Evie's your friend. She'd have complete faith in you and wouldn't reject you."

"Ben, it's not as simple as you think... Evie's not *into* romance! Books yes, real life *no*. In addition to that... *how* can I tell her without permamently changing our friendship? I thought I almost *lost* Evie the other day!"

"What on earth happened??" Benji, incredulous, inquired.

Mya sat up and hugged herself, digging her nails in and covering her head.

"You'll think I'm lying, but I'm not. I dragged Evie with me onto someone's *private property*, and I didn't listen to the obvious warnings she gave that she was uncomfortable. I was *cruel* to her that day. We *both* were miserable, trapped, dusty, musty... she was *livid*, Ben!"

"You thought you pushed Evie away from you?"

"Yes! The bullying I experienced resurfaced, the nightmares... I can't lose Ev. She's the world and the sky and the clouds..."

"She's *everything* to you," Benji summarized. "You think that if you came out to her, she'd leave you?"

Mya gasped. Benji had been able to assume and correctly read her mind numerous occassions - how was he this *well versed* at psychology?

*I guess that's what happens when both of your parents are psychologists.*

"You'd be right..." she glumly replied. "I don't want to come out to her - if I lose her, I'll lose a part of *myself*. I don't want her to *ridicule me*!"

Benji mumbled. "As far as I know, Evie's not the type of person to deem her own friend ridiculous. She'd much *rather* yell that to Daniela's face. You haven't done anything embarrassing in front of Evie that would give her hints, right?"

Mya heard a loud roar in her ears.

*The kiss*.

She *did* do something incredibly embarrassing in front of Evie!

They. Locked. Lips.

They. *Kissed*.

Mya had tasted cherries, and candies, and sweets, and flowers, and...

*She sealed the deal*.

"Mya? You alive?" Benji prompted.

Yelping, Mya fell back on the bed. "Barely," she called back. "But... I did do something. In front of Evie. I... I..."

"What did you do?"

Reaching for her phone, imagining she was gripping Benji's hand, Mya muttered the events of Cracklog Manor clear as day.

"I kissed her. On *accident*. But I still kissed her! And I liked the taste of her lips! How passionate it was for a split second! That started the epiphany, and then it dropped on me..."

"It was at this moment that Mya Heartley knew she was gay!" Benji teased, chuckling. "Oh, Mya, it was an accident! Evie didn't seem to mind it and you guys are still friends. Sounds like you just like playing with fire."

"Benji!" Mya protested indignantly.

"What? I'm right."

"I'm having an existential crisis!"

"You're in love and you're so cute when you're in love."

"Stop that!"

"Nooo, I loved you first, you idiot!"

Mya, smiling, gave in to Benji's childish banter and laughed along with him, and time lapsed like hours as she chatted with and teased her former crush, tickled pink by his words, laughter pouring into her empty crevices.

Her day was brightened, and now, she had more sources to reach out to in terms of her bisexuality and steps moving forward.

The storm had receded and transitioned to quiet rains. Tranquility.

Mya, hiding her phone in her pocket, stretched and headed out into the living room, where her parents sat on the sofa.

"Glad you could join us, Mya," Patrick murmured, patting a spot for her to sit on the couch. "We have some exciting news for you."

"Really?" she questioned, standing in front of the TV.

"So, we got messaged by Evie's dad," Nita stated cheerfully. "Evie wants to come over for dinner tonight."

Suddenly, everything in Mya's field of view turned to *gray*, and gasping, the hairs on the back of her neck stood on end.

Evie? Over at *her place*? For *dinner*?

That sounded like a trope *way* too familiar.

*A romantic evening! No! Too soon! I can't do this!*

"I'm sorry... what???" she demanded, leaf-green eyes flaring with specks of panic.

"Evie's coming over for dinner!" Nita repeated with more excitement. "We're going to make some Greek chicken and veggies, and you get to have a peaceful evening with your crush!"

"*What*?"

Nita frowned, seeing her daughter's appalled, flushed, drained-of-color face. Was she *upset* that Evie was coming over?

"Mya, are you okay?"

"Do you *think* I'm fine? You're inviting the *very person* I *can't* control my feelings around to *our house*! Mom! Dad! If I'm around Evie, I'm going to lose it! Please, you have to reschedule!"

"Sssh, baby, calm down," Patrick whispered, tentatively yanking her into a fond hug, though it did nothing to take the new burden placed onto his daughter.

Mya whimpered. "But... every time Evie is near me, my thoughts run wild, and I fantasize... what if I lose control and ki-"

"Mya," Patrick said again. "Calm down. You're okay. You aren't going to breach Evie's privacy and you're going to remain in control. You're going to be alright."

Nita joined the fray and rubbed her daughter's cheek as Patrick let go of her. "Darling, Evie wants to see you tonight and wants to hang out. You can manage this; it's really minor and just for tonight. We're going to make it flexible and comfortable for you and we'll make it seamless. Okay?"

"You can do it. Make Evie smile - and her happiness is gonna bounce back to you," Patrick added, giving her a kiss to the forehead.

Despite all the reassurance, Mya felt no better.

She was grasping at straws and *sticks*.

The voices in her head were *hollering* that she was making a mistake. Dinner would happen, and she'd prove herself to be a gay nightmare to her straight friend who'd have no interest in her and dump her for a straight friend.

She'd be ostracized, humiliated, and left as a moron who chased ghosts, not chased her dream girl.

Yet... Evie wanted a nice dinner with her family tonight, and her parents were adamant she was going to be fine. She could keep it together... right?

She didn't want to disappoint her parents either - *or* Evie.

*I don't want to make Evie think I'm an entitled, spineless brat...*

*My soul is leaving my body. I... I don't wanna do this. However, my parents and Evie are depending on me to get through.*

She had no options. Dinner with Evie was a green light.

"Okay. I will." Respectfully dipping her head, Mya may have well have had her soul purchased by Satan.

"You're gonna be perfectly alright, Mya. Trust me when I say it," Nita remarked, winking, and she headed to the kitchen.

With an hour to kill, Mya spent most of it in the bathroom, smoothing down her hair, brushing it haphazardly to remove any stray knots.

She checked her face to make sure acne wasn't growing in.

She rubbed her eyelashes and removed two stray lashes that had gotten loose.

Studying her face intensely, she scanned for flaws, imperfections, detriments that would ruin her appeal to Evie.

*I have to look perfect. I have to BE on Evie's level of perfection. If I'm not... she'll believe this night was a catastrophe!*

Mya had smoothed out her complexion, but still looked the same as she usually did.

She wore her blue jacket, jeans, and kept her shoes on.

The mirror reflected her image back, and meeting her reflection's hand, she touched the cool glass.

*Is this the person Evie wants to see tonight?*

She shivered, a strange chill impacting her back. Her gaze locked on the mirror.

*I cannot mess this up for Evie. I have to please her!*

Blobs of red stained her cheeks.

*Ugh, stop panicking!* she yelled at herself quietly, slapping herself on the cheek, and the blush disappeared. She slicked her hair down and stood straight, posture firm.

Mya had to act *natural*. *Poised*.

After spending another hour of preparing and nervous pacing, both in the bathroom and in her bedroom, the warm chime of the doorbell sounded, and gasping, Mya ran out and grabbed the doorknob, pulling the door wide open.

There, before her, was Evie - Mya had expected her to wear something very formal and refined, but she was in her regular sweater, jeans, and boots, her saccharine smile, and featherweight eyes.

"Hi!" she said keenly, draping her arms over Mya's shoulders and pulling her in for a tight hug, which she reciprocated, but the blush crept back onto her cheeks.

*This touch... want it... need it...*

One of her outer layers had already melted under Evie's touch. Mya broke the hug immediately, nodding at Evie, and nudging her in the direction of the sofa, they sat down and watched what was on the television - ESPN.

"Any sports tonight?" she questioned, laying back on the cushions.

"SportsCenter's on right now," Mya replied. "Mavericks will play the Trail Blazers in an hour. NBCSN might have hockey."

"Cool beans." Mya was surprised.

How was Evie so *nonchalant* for a night as *huge* as this?

Then again, she *was* a fan of sports and had plans to wear a letterman when the weather warmed up.

A tingling sensation shot through her shoulder, and whipping, Mya found that Evie had laid back just a little, rubbing her shoulder against hers. Her body itched and ached, seeking that touch on her face and neck.

Evie had her eyes set on the SportsCenter broadcast, but she heard her friend fidget and met her eyes, seeing the blush on her face and chuckling.

"Sportsball not your thing?" she teased, playfully batting her shoulder, a smirk somehow on her face.

Mya blushed *harder*.

Evie was so *attractive* when she did something like that.

Clamping her teeth down on her lip, she hummed along and nodded, batting her on her shoulder in turn, and Evie rested her back on the cushions.

Mya was happy, she was happy, and it was a good night.

*Can't wait for dinner, with my own best friend... it'll be the perfect sweet thing to uplift her. Alleviate that personal turmoil going on.*

*It's going to be a blast, My. Wait and see!*

Fifteen minutes later, dinner was finished, and the girls were invited to sit down at the table. Evie eyed her dinner hungrily, licking her lips, and Mya stared at her plate normally, hoping she wasn't acting too drab.

As Evie maneuvered slices of chicken onto a slice of Greek bread with a fork, Nita spoke up from the back end of the table.

"So, Evie, how's it been going? I hope your mom hasn't been a bother."

"Well. Mom's been irked, as per usual... though she seems to have put Cracklog behind her."

"What a relief. She was a *lunatic* that day!" Patrick quipped, swirling a piece of chicken around in tzatziki sauce.

Evie rolled her eyes. "I have no qualms with that."

"And how's school?"

"Cruising through classes, as always," she remarked, holding her fork up in the air, veneration shining in her eyes and radiating off her body movements, and Mya stared at her awkwardly.

*You're going at a mile a minute and I'm silent as death.*

"Average grades?"

"Between ninety-five and one hundred. Mom pushes me to get all A's, and the effort's *definitely* paid off. Daniela's shaking in her *boots*, I bet!"

Mya's leaf-green eyes, appalled, drilled into her friend.

"Ev, I thought you didn't care about Daniela's rivalry with you?" she pointed out, poking at the contents of her plate halfheartedly.

"Oh, it depends," she replied with a *cute as hell* wink. "I'm in the mood to fiddle with her strings some days."

"Uh-huh." Mya made herself nod, though it felt stiff and like she was in an ophthalmic chair, her head trapped by metal panels.

She made herself eat the chicken and nibbled pretentiously on the Greek bread she was given, but her cheeks itched, faint tinges of blush clinging on for dear life.

*Come on, keep playing dummy... don't let everyone down. Evie won't see that I'm dying inside.*

"Mmm. The chicken's great. So are the veggies," she commented, faking an approving voice and stuffing her mouth with two slices of cucumber.

"Yeah, this is delicious," Evie added, downing a swig of water from the glass next to her plate.

"Hoooo, it's honestly nothing," Nita dismissed, waving her left hand and placing the right on her glass of chardonnay wine. "We're not nearly as talented as your mom, Evie."

"Nothing? My mom *relies on cookbooks* to make her food. If she didn't, we'd all be dead of *food poisoning*!" Evie retorted, and Mya wheezed. Okay, that was actually funny.

"Opal can't cook?" Patrick pondered aloud.

"*Rarely*. Most times, her food sucks ass. But sometimes? The food is worth it, if she happens to cook it right."

"Like the sizzling cake?" Mya mentioned.

"Don't try starving me, Heartley!" she fired back, and Mya blushed, hearing the sarcasm and straight-to-the-point tone she frequently exhibited.

*So adorable...*

Evie was a *bean* when she was sarcastic - her words were priceless.

*Maybe this is going to plan...*

She scooped up two more cucumbers and a baby carrot, placing them in her mouth and chewing slowly.

"Hey Evie, you got any plans now that we're *defrosting*? Gonna hang out with Mya more?" Patrick queried.

All of a sudden, Mya heard the sound of *car tires* screeching, metal crashing, buildings imploding, and trees falling.

The vegetables in her mouth tasted like *gruel*.

She thought she could taste *blood* in her mouth.

*Gonna... hang out with... me?*

She sat erect like a rabbit, senses on high alert.

Evie nodded, brightening. "I do! Dad and I went to Barnes & Noble and got this brand new fantasy book, and I intended for Mya and I read it *together*!"

Mya's face went red.

*She bought a book and wants to read it with me, at the same time, same place, in each other's space...*

That thought was so romantic, so delicate, and the fantasies began to appear in the corner of her mind.

Evie, next to her, reading a page, then switching to Mya, who'd place a hand on her, holding her close...

"Oooh, My! It's fantasy too. Your favorite genre! *And*, the cherry on top... the lead character's queer!"

"What's with you and gay book characters?" Nita asked jokingly.

"Nothing. Gay protagonists add more flavor compared to straight protagonists," she countered, that smirk from earlier returning.

How on earth could *no one* see Mya's face? It was *scarlet red* and appeared as if she had been drenched in cranberry juice.

Reluctantly, she swallowed the vegetables. Her throat *hurt*; the pain was strep throat without the disease itself.

*This is not happening.*

*THIS CANNOT BE HAPPENING.*

"Wanna hear the title, My?" Evie said, tapping her plate with her fork, drawing her attention to hers.

How was she this *oblivious* to the misery?

"Y-Yes?" she squeaked.

"*The Lost and the Powerful*! The lead character is pansexual."

*Pansexual*.

Winter's words from earlier resurfaced.

*Bisexual or pansexual*.

*I thought I was pansexual.*

"P-pansexual? N-niceee," she stuttered anxiously, quickly tacking on a, "I'd like to read it w-with y-y-you." She twirled her fork in the air like her father had done, but it slipped out of her hand and landed with a clank and *splat* in her tzatziki sauce.

Six baffled, concerned eyes bore into her soul, and eyes flitting about, she saw that she had casted doubts on *everyone* that she wasn't fine.

"W-What?" she demanded, her tone pitched high.

"You just dropped your fork in tzatziki, honey," Nita stated calmly.

"And why is your face so *red*?" Patrick questioned, scratching his chin.

Mya stared down, noticing her fork caked in tzatziki sauce, and she could feel her face burning up with no fever, but of embarrassment out of the love she could not *contain*.

*Contain* for her own *crush* sitting with *her* and *eating dinner* with her.

Mya knew it. She *knew it* clearer than a cloudless sky.

Dinner was going to go awry and blow up in her face. It was destined to.

Whatever she did, she *could not* be around Evie, but her layers had caved in and exposed the vulernable side to her she *didn't* want her friend of three years to see.

She could *not* keep herself glued together in front of Evie, nor could she pull off a fake version of her.

The eyes searched her soul *harder*, beady and judgmentally. Sparks had formed in Evie's eyes.

The look in her face communicated all too well that she now knew her friend hadn't been acting authentic the whole time.

"Umm... it's just so hot in here, I'm, erm, sweating!" she lied in a last-ditch vie to convince the dinner table that she was, in fact, acting normally and like a typical human.

But they didn't buy it hook, line, and sinker.

Especially *one person*.

"If it's so hot in here, then I wonder why I'm not sweating in a sweater," she murmured, analyzing her friend, making Mya feel like she was a salmon for sale at a fish market.

Evie approached carefully, worried. "Mya... is something wrong?"

Mya shut down. She didn't *move*.

*I can't get too close to her...*

"Mya?" Evie prompted, reaching out and laying the palm of her hand on her shoulder.

The touch was gasoline to a match, and flinching, Mya could feel the heat of *flames* licking at her body.

Her fantasies about what she wanted out of her crush took over her head, and they played, the slideshow rolling and never stopping.

Holding Evie's hand tenderly, tracing the wrinkles in the skin.

Hugging her, refusing to let go.

The press of their foreheads against each other's.

The touching of hips, backsides, and the soft flesh of their necks.

Their lips meeting, connecting for a kiss, the sweet taste and highs of loves kicking in.

This touch Evie had gifted her was *everything* she wanted, and all Mya *yearned for* was to pull her friend up to her face and kiss her again, gain the one thing she had acquired on *accident*.

But the fantasies stopped playing.

Evie had touched her shoulder.

She was red, blushing, and unable to hide.

*Oh my god... what have I done... I... no, I can't!*

Finally, Mya crackled and fell under the pressure.

"**DON'T**!" she screamed, and peeling her hand away, Evie gasped and jumped backwards.

Her parents, gasping as well, hid their *stunned* expressions with their hands.

Mya, guilt smashing into her in a furious assault, saw that she had used a *shockwave* to shove everyone away.

Including *Evie*, whom she had already drove up a wall at Cracklog Manor.

She had just *humiliated herself* in front of everyone she loved, all because she had no control over her love hormones, her feelings, and innermost desires.

*I can't control myself! I'm just a queer DISASTER!*

With tears welling in her sensitive, raw eyes, Mya fled the dinner table, her crush, and her parents, skidded into her bedroom, slammed the door, curled into a sitting ball, and pulled her hood over her head.

Although they stung, she let the tears fall anyway.

*I'm an idiot! I'm such an idiot, a crackhead, an embarrassment...*

Mya hated herself. She hated *every* part of herself, her red face, everything.

She had screwed up what should have been a peaceful, relaxing dinner all because she had no ability to control her amounting feelings for Evie, she had pushed her friend away from her *again*, and she had humiliated herself in front of her and her parents.

Another outburst at dinner, another day where she hid herself and broke down.

Why did she keep making the same old mistakes?

*I can't stop making mistakes in front of Evie. She doesn't deserve anyone who treats her kindness like a freakshow... does she even deserve me?*

Knowing she had cut Evie out of the picture not even a *week* after Cracklog, Mya sniffed, wailed, and sobbed into her kneecaps, the pain unbearable and stifling.

*This is how it dies...*

*Knock knock*.

"Mya...?"

Mya sat up, her back sticking to the wall.

*Evie* was outside the door.

*N-no! She's gonna... she's gonna disown me...*

*I can't tell her I'm gay. It's going to ruin me.*

She shook her head and refused to give a reply.

"Mya, can you open the door?"

The frazzled, tearful girl didn't move a muscle.

"I'm going to come in, okay?" Evie called, turning the knob to her bedroom and entering.

She *gasped*, shocked and heart *breaking* by the sight in front of her.

Mya had hunched herself into a ball, her face and ears red, and tears were leaking down her face, wetting her cheeks. She looked dismayed, upset, and had a look in her eyes that all but screamed, "I resent myself."

Her eyes did not react to Evie's entrance, almost as if she hadn't even heard her enter.

"Oh, Mya..." she whispered, kneeling down next to her. "What's gotten you like this?"

The only response Mya could give was a brisk shake of her head, a clear *no*, and Evie nodded. Mya choked out a wail.

*Kill me, please... I don't want her to see me at my worst... make me disappear and never come back.*

Evie's heart broke further. She had *never* seen Mya act in such a despairing way, *or* had seen her close herself off from the friend she confessed everything to.

Something was *very* wrong - and whatever it was, Mya had kept the truth from her.

*She's hiding something from me, can't explain why to me... and usually I'm the one who keeps secrets! This is beyond uncharacteristic of Mya.*

*Mya, I'm going to find out the truth just so I can see the you I've always seen... you don't deserve to be in this much pain.*

Her friend began to claw at the sides of her jacket, a gentle scratch, but a bright flag for Evie.

"Do you want to take your jacket off and cool down?" she asked, sitting down beside her.

Whimpering, Mya obliged to the question and peeled her jacket off, placing it beside her and revealing her undershirt, a favorite of Evie's. It was cyan and had a single, blue heart in the middle, true to Mya's last name.

The move did nothing to stop her crying, though, and tears continued to fall.

Evie scooted closer. Mya scooted away.

*What the?* Evie thought, taken aback. *Mya's... Mya's pushing me away?*

Consternation and trepidation flooded her eyes, betraying her thoughts to Mya, who gasped and hid her face.

"Mya... I can give you space if this is too personal for you," she said, preparing to get up.

Suddenly, the sight of her moving made a pin drop in Mya.

*No! Don't leave... I... your presence is so inviting...*

Lunging, she clasped her friend's hand, shocking her.

Dark green eyes met light green eyes.

"Just stay!"

Stunned, Evie saw the plea curved in Mya's face, tinged with desperation, and the grip she had on her hand tightened.

This was *serious*. Mya *needed* her, right here and right now. Evie still had zero clue as to what had been going on, but regardless, she obeyed the will and sat back down.

"Okay. I'll stay for as long as you need."

"Thank you," Mya uttered in a broken whisper.

"I'm going to stay here," Evie reassured. "Ssh, My. You're alright. Easy."

Mya, compelled by how relaxed and momentous she was, brought herself to stare and could feel the aching in her heart subsiding. Things began to stabilize and materialize, and she could see the warmth, the light, and compassion in Evie.

They were on the same level. She understood the pain and was willing to listen.

*I... I could come out to her...*

*No, who am I kidding??? That'll drive her away from me for good! I'm just a fricking coward.*

"I can't do this," she muttered aloud, her voice so low that Evie thought what she had just said was unintelligible.

"What can't you do?" Evie questioned, closing the gap between them and leaving it in inches.

Mya, alarmed, faced her. She was reaching for the truth and could obtain it... and then, disaster.

"I don't want to tell you, Evie!"

"Tell me what?"

Just stay one more night

"The **truth**! Goddamnit, if I do, I'll **shove you away** from me! You'll think I'm weird! A *deadweight*!" Mya snapped, hurt blazing in her eyes, and Evie winced.

She now realized her friend was indeed *hiding a secret* from her - and it would have heavy consequences on their friendship depending on the context.

*Mya is believing she'll push me away like she did at Cracklog... what on earth happened these past two days?*

"Mya, you won't do that! I don't even fully *know* why you're behaving like this," she stated. "But I have rarely seen you act so abnormal... so something has changed."

I'll be by your side

Mya gasped, in her face panic, and she cried in bursts. Evie's heart shattered repeatedly.

*What* on earth could be in a secret that was ripping her friend apart from the seams?

*I know what they say about secrets: they balloon so big until the person can't keep it inside. That balloon pops, the person crumbles, and out the secrets come.*

*Mya shouldn't feel the need to conceal herself from me. I'm her friend! Why is she pushing me away...*

We'll live for a new day

We live life the hard way

Without warning, a disturbing realization dawned on Evie, and she forced herself to avoid choking and hitting herself in the nose.

*Am... am I the reason Mya is acting like this? Have I done something to make her upset... with me?*

Evie felt like a complete jerk, and clutching at the edge of her sweater, she spoke unevenly.

But not today, just stay

"Mya... did I do something to hurt you???"

"*No*!" she protested. "You're too innocent for that, Ev!"

"Are you *embarrassed* to be around me?" she prompted again, looking beneath the surface for the secret dividing the two's relationship in half. "Mya, you don't have to lie to me. It doesn't have to be this way."

"What if it **HAS** to be give and take??" Mya snapped. "You don't *understand* the burden I've placed on myself. You *never will* and *never can*! Once you learn the truth, you'll *hate me*!"

Just stay, just stay

One more night

Letting out a gasp, Evie placed a hand on her fast-beating, near *bleeding*, heart.

Mya was *burdened* by her secret.

If she let it out, she claimed that her friend would infinitely *loathe her*.

*I still don't know how life-changing this is... but I understand her situation more than I did before.*

In a way, Evie thought of Winter, who had put herself under similar pressure when she had first met her and Mya. She had been hesitant to reveal that she was a lesbian out of fear they would openly reject her for liking girls.

*Everyone has their inner demons. But I don't want Mya to run from me if I haven't done anything to her. She's brought it on herself, this burden... and it's breaking her. I won't let this stand.*

*I won't stop digging until I get where you are - I'm gonna make you smile. I promise.*

"Mya," she pleaded, "I'm not going to hate you. I *never* will! Every friendship has their secrets, raw, strange, natural. They come, they pass. I don't want to shove you away from me; I want you to *stay* with me. You don't usually hide from me unless something *horrible* has happened - but even then, I hide from you more because of the turmoil I go through."

Mya faced her, sniffling, fountains of tears still pouring from her damaged eyes, her lip wobbling uneasily, tensely.

Things hadn't eased.

"My? Do you want to tell me about what's going on?" Evie inquired gently, reaching out to her.

Mya saw an outstretched hand reach for her, wanting to pull her in, grace her shoulder, and oh, how she *dreamed* of touching it.

However, if she did, control would be lost, her love insticts would overpower, and she'd be kissing Evie whilst pinning her on the floor.

A *nightmare* she couldn't possibly comprehend.

*I'll grab her and turn into an animal! I can't!*

The feelings welled, and welled, until she drowned in them, choked in them, *suffocated* in them. Her breathing spiraled, her bearings spiraled, everything breaking and tugging and yanking...

*Want... love... can't... must...*

One more night

"Mya, whoa, easy-"

"**I CAN'T TELL YOU**!" she spat, causing Evie to stumble and avoid hitting the wooden floor with her hands. Mya shook uncontrollably, in huffs, her face red and eyes teeming with tears.

"Evie, *why* can't you take any of the hints I give you? I've unleashed *hell* inside of myself, and there's something in me that's *changed*! You can't know what I'm going through... you hate this. You'll hate me... and I'll *lose you*! I can't lose the friendship I cultivated between us! Maybe you're better off-"

Evie, suddenly caving, lunged forward and seized both of Mya's hands, startling her, but the grip was firm. One thing was notable.

*She wasn't going to let go*.

"**LISTEN TO ME**!" she barked, beckoning Mya's attention, and drawn to her *dominating*, *potent* eyes, she didn't look away or tear away.

The warmth in her hands blossomed into flowers, and Evie caressed them with her thumbs. Feelings of love and sympathy ebbed inside and coated her heart in honey, soothing it. Her breathing became small, regular rasps, and her heart stopped kicking so intensely.

Evie's words had impacted where they needed to. Now, she was in her own room, colorful and unique, her friend sitting in front of her and massaging her hands.

She was not mad. Nor was she resenting her.

She was willing to listen.

Just feel my heart inside

The tears flowing down her face finally came to an end.

Evie, sliding her hands up to her cold wrists, gripped them.

"Mya... you *shouldn't* need to lie to me. I'm your friend. Your *best friend*. I'd *always* listen to you when it comes to **anything**! The big things, the dumb things. While *every friendship* has its rough patches - we've gone through that several times - *no secret* can destroy us and what we *have*."

Our love can grow so bright

(Just stay)

Mya didn't say a word and stared ahead at her.

"Friendships require communication. When one of us doesn't communicate, the other can't know what's going on. I'm really worried for you; you haven't been acting like yourself with me for days. It's not me who's done this to you, but something that's been going on externally you don't want to tell me about. Am I correct?"

Mya nodded. "For the most part."

"Alright. I don't know what's caused you to change so radically in behavior, why you blush profusely around me, or sudden embarrassment... but you will *never* lose me. **Never**. I'm going to listen to you *and* support you through this hurdle, *this strife* - and I will **always** be your best friend."

We found our way

Into the grace again

She placed Mya's hands in her lap, cradling them gently.

"I will stay."

Finally, Mya's sorrow had turned to light, particles and fireflies floating all around, and her frown turned upside down. She beamed with gratitude, relief, and more importantly, *clarity*.

Who was she to assume that *the person* cradling her hands was going to bitterly reject her and hang her out to dry?

Let's not pretend

Our hearts have life again

No! She was being careless from the get-go - Evie wouldn't ever abandon her. Her loyalty was forever bound to her, she'd always protect her, and she'd always hug her when she had found melancholy.

*I haven't lost Evie... she's going to support me.*

Evie smiled back at her. Mya smiled back.

They were the perfect reflection of each other.

Just stay one more night

I'll be by your side

And Mya had the reassurance she needed, backed up with Winter's game-changing advice and Benji's chat from earlier in the day.

*They were right. Evie is going to listen to me. And she won't reject me for being queer. I don't have to cower...*

*From now on, no more half-assed me. It's time to tell Evie the truth.*

*She deserves it.*

Just stay, just stay

(Just stay)

The last person to hear that she was beautifully queer was to be her beautiful best friend and enthralling crush.

"Okay. Thank you, Evie. I'm going to tell you everything," she whispered, gripping her hands back and savoring the touch. She didn't leap up and try to kiss her. She sat *still*.

Her feelings had been held back by a new wall - and she had formed it on her own.

"Okay," Evie replied, giving a soothing nod. "Go ahead. I'm listening."

Let's not pretend

"So... I've *changed* as a person," Mya began. "Not in a way you'd expect, and, well... it started at Cracklog."

Evie, eyes clouding, remembered the terrible, painful day in Geiger Heights, where she and Mya broke off only to crumble under the weight of their internal misgivings.

"This ordeal stems from the manor?" she asked.

"Yes... yes, it does. I had wanted to make the day special for you. Since I... suggested having the picnic. Yet I took you for granted and dragged you through sludge and cobweb. When I sat there in that room... I was disconnected from reality - I was disconnected from you."

"Did you miss me that badly?"

"More than you could imagine, Ev... the room c-closed in on me... and the only person I wanted was *you*. You're my best friend - I had to repay you and make amends. You saved me, and... my pride and these new feelings took control of me."

"What feelings?" Evie didn't know what she was talking about. Had Mya felt something new in Cracklog?

"Pride. Affection. I let them go to my head and I tripped... I kissed you."

Just stay

"That wasn't a meaningful kiss," Evie assured. "I wasn't angry with you, Mya. You made a mistake."

Mya shook her head. "No. You may have not found it to mean anything... but I did."

"*You* found the kiss to mean something?" Evie questioned, tone light. She wasn't angered, but listening, and Mya proceeded.

"It was an accident and not meant to happen. But when I tasted your lips, I tasted all these new things I hadn't tasted before. *Felt* before. That was just the tip of the iceberg, though."

Evie nodded, encouraging her to go on, and Mya's shoulders rose, preparing for the next part that would rework their chemistry *permamently*.

"After we said goodbye... I couldn't stop staring at you. I shouldn't have stared, it's intrusive. But seeing you made me think of the feelings I had gotten in Cracklog, and... I had an epiphany. I struggled to believe it was real, but it's real, a part of me, and something I'm not going to *deny*."

Evie was surprised. She *had* felt eyes on her that day - Mya's. She wasn't tripping.

What had changed her and made her act so pent up? She was about to find out.

"Evie, do you promise to take me seriously when I reveal the truth to you?" Mya asked, gripping her hands so hard they turned pink.

Just stay

"I swear. Cross my heart." Evie let go of her hands for a moment and crossed her heart three times.

*Holy shrimp. I'm doing this. I'm coming out to Ev.*

Mya had the words on her tongue, she just had to let them be free. There was no more cowardice, lies, and fake happy separating them from each other. There was no curbing their friendship.

She had triumphed over her hormones at last, and they diminished to nothing more than an afterthought.

Her fantasies of Evie were gone, and all she could see was a crush she hoped she could someday date.

We found our way again

We found our way again

Evie had taught her mastery of her feelings - and now she could run free.

And, opening her mouth, Mya let the light shine through in blue, pink and purple.

"Evie... I like kissing girls just as much as I'd want to kiss boys. I'm bisexual."

We found our way

A new place

Ten seconds of silence flooded her bedroom, and all she could hear was her breathing and Evie's breathing in the wake of her confession.

It was done. It was over. The burden was off her chest and diminished.

She had finally come out to her best friend without giving her enough hints that she was her crush.

But how would Evie react? Mya awaited her answer, hoping that she hadn't made a horrid decision.

It was either cold rejection, or-

"*Tuyệt vời*!"

Confused, Mya cocked her head to the side, perusing Evie's expression - and she was blown ten feet out of the water.

Evie had the most joyous smile on her face, eyes sparks and reflecting the ocean's expansive waves, waves that were tugging her in, and she shed *shockwaves* upon *shockwaves* of uncontained, unbridled *gratification*.

"Oh, Mya! You wanted to tell me you were bi the whole time! That's... that's the reason you wanted to hide from me - you thought I was going to turn you into mincemeat, weren't you?"

Mya, spellbound by her reaction, crawled closer and tentatively responded, "Yeah... I- I don't have a crush on you, I'd like to affirm that. It's just, when we did *that* in the manor, I wanted to do it to girls, because girls... they're attractive. They have a special aura that I'd find in the average boy."

Her heart poked at the edge of her chest, begging her to take it a step further and sweep Evie in her arms, asking her out, but in her mind, common sense resonated.

Tonight wasn't the night she'd ask out Evie. She'd wait weeks - if not months - on that decision.

For tonight, all that mattered was her friend refusing to sever their friendship - and instead making it grow more everlasting.

"So... who's the lucky girl?" Evie prompted eagerly, drumming her hands on the floorboards, and Mya giggled.

*You, silly,* she replied internally.

"Well, my crush has been around me often. She's sweet, unintentionally hilarious, has a flawless complexion, drop-dead *gorgeous* eyes, and is so painstakingly charming..."

"Aww..." Evie found Mya's gushing *adorable*. She was proud.

This was *true love* - her friend had found her link - and to see her smile and gush with the look of a star-crossed lover in her eyes - made Evie's heart swell with feelings even she hadn't danced with before.

What were they? Someday she'd know. But she had more important things on her platter.

"My crush is an *extraordinary* human being, and someday, perhaps... I'll ask her out. You have yet to meet her, Evie... but objects in the mirror are closer than they appear."

"I can't wait to meet her!" Evie proclaimed excitedly. "Congratulations, Mya. Words can't describe how proud I am of you."

*Psh, she's so dense. Perfect,* Mya thought to herself, nearly snickering.

"Oh, you'll meet her. I told Winter and Benji already."

Evie leaned up against her, their shoulder blades touching, and the sparks between them grew into frenzied embers.

"And Benji supports your relationship?"

"Yup. He had plenty of teasing up his sleeves. Actually... he motivated me to come out to you - and Winter did too."

Evie raised an eyebrow. "*Winter* pushed you to express yourself? I didn't see her as the type of person to be handing out advice..."

"Ev, she studied her gender orientation for *eons*! She knew what she was talking about, and she encouraged me to come out to my loved ones. It's just... I've feared telling you because I didn't want my girl crush dividing us. You've never been into romance, sans the books, and after Cracklog... damn. I don't know where I'd be standing now if it weren't for you."

Evie flicked her hand and faced Mya with determination, confidence, knowledge of the truth in her every crevice. Truly connecting with the person she held dear, she pressed her forehead to hers, held her hands again, and uplifted her spirits higher.

"Mya, you are so *silly*. Just because I'm in the balance on romantic subjects doesn't mean I'm not opposed to *you* being in love. Boys can kiss girls, they kiss boys. Girls can kiss boys, girls can kiss girls. I don't give a *hoot* if your lips are stuck on a boy or if you're making out with a girl. It's your *choice*, your *decision*! Love who *you* want to love. I'll be right here next to you, *supporting* you. Appreciating you..."

I know it's easy

To get lost in yesterday

She crawled backwards, only to halt and place her hand on top of Mya's head, skin converging in her fluffy auburn hair. Her hand traced down her cheek, making the blush return, then to her chin, her other cheek, her neck, her shoulder, and then, lastly, her chest - where her heart of gold and merry lay.

"From every strand of your auburn hair, to your smooth, dainty skin, to those hearts in your leaf-green eyes, to your neat chin and petite cheekbones, to your relaxed shoulders, and above all, your heart... you're beautiful, Mya. The most beautiful person I've ever met. Keep illuminating the blights on this earth the way you do, bring everyone joy and positivity, get back up, try again, and never stop doing what you do. You're dancing with the universe. As you're off kissing a boy or a girl... I will be with you as you are the sun in my life."

To bring back all these things

I know you loved them, I know you loved them

Mya, sniffing, blinked, tears dripping down her eyes. The pain had subsided, giving way to the passion, the elation, and the feeling that the world in its entirety was in her hands.

Evie had shown her that she was fearless - she wasn't burdened and wasn't going to be put down. Her bisexuality was a special, unique gift, and so was the way she wished to express herself - in words or in the way she appeared.

But I know that I can try again

To warm your heart, please understand

Things don't stay forever

Evie, in her own eyes, painted a picture of her in her mind, the bits, pieces, and elements that composed her, the individual she was.

Every detail was holy.

She wasn't jaded. She was *sated*, but she could manage the feelings.

We say we want to make a change

I must admit, it feels a little strange

To see it in a different way

She had control. She had freedom.

And it was all thanks to the person she loved more than merely a friend.

"Evie... *thank you*!" she cried, flinging herself onto her friend and hugging. Jumping, she was unbalanced by the weight, and both landed on the floor.

And even if it passes by

This isn't how we say goodbye

Just until next time

*Thunk*.

Staring down, Mya had discovered that she had pinned Evie - and they were nose-to-nose.

Blush was present on the two of their cheeks.

Then Evie broke out into laughter, as did Mya, who admired her holly-green eyes while she admired her leaf-green eyes.

Green on green. Leaf on leaf. Light to dark. Dark to light.

There's nothing wrong with shedding tears

To make sure that your sight is clear

And bring to light our silly fears

Cackling like hyenas, they leapt onto Mya's bed and laid there, nestled close, and it was everything.

"I think dinner was worth it," Mya whispered.

"Me too," Evie whisper-replied.

"Hey, you wanna see something?"

"Yeah."

Clambering over to the edge of her bed, Mya allowed herself to roll off. Evie peered over the edge with intrigued eyes.

Her friend pointed to her backpack, which now had a pin attached to one of its straps.

Blue, pink, purple.

*The bisexual pin*.

Evie's heart had swelled to the length of her entire lung cage.

"You creative little genius. It's terrific, I'm so proud of you," she quipped affectionately.

"Creative indeed." Leaping back up onto the bed, Mya grabbed Evie - and knowing what her weak point was, scratched her behind her neck.

"*Ha*! Stop it! That tickles, haha!" Evie could not stop laughing as Mya scratched her and pinned her, triumph in the smirk she gave, and she held her close.

Evie stared up into eyes she *suddenly* began to die for.

*She's... adorable. Otherworldly...*

When she met Mya's eyes, she was defying gravity.

When she felt Mya's cheeks or her shoulder, a richness seeped into her veins.

When she was enclosed and personal with Mya, Evie's heart was evoked and would thump miles a minute.

*You're everything I want.*

Unbeknownst to Mya, someone *else* had slowly, silently engaged in the beginning processes of falling in love with her.

Also unbeknownst to Mya, her friend had left the door creak open slightly, enough for her parents to peer in and see that everything had been resolved.

The girls were peaceful and having fun, leading to only one conclusion.

"Our baby's figured everything out," Patrick said to Nita. She nodded in hard agreement.

## Cast

* **Dakota Fanning** as Mya
* **Peyton Elizabeth Lee** as Evie
* **Trent Garrett** as Patrick
* **Wendie Malick** as Nita
* **Justin Briner** as Benji

## Songs

* Dodie - *She*
* Beatcore & Ashley Apollodor - *Just Stay*
* Duumu (ft. Slyleaf) - *Illuminate* (snippet)

## Trivia

* The episode is named after the 1998 roncom *There's Something About Mary*.
* Mya's process of coming out throughout the episode is inspired by many real-world coming out scenarios. Av says that she wanted the coming out to have much more impact than before and wanted to illustrate how beautiful coming out can be.
* The original draft of the episode was more simplified - Mya would struggle with her feelings but come out in the living room to her parents. She'd walk with Evie to school, and during said scene, the Rihanna song *What's My Name?* would play in the background. Afterward, she'd confess she was bisexual to Evie in their tree.
	+ Av hated the original version of the episode since it "made her feel incredibly bad" for Mya and was a "complete mess" overall. She even considered it to be her least favorite episode while Sisi found it her favorite.
* Originally, the ending was extended and would feature Evie and Mya's original walk to school, this time with the Electro-Light song *Where It All Began*, also teasing Danyka Nadeau's appearance with the song. However, it was axed for time constraints; *Where It All Began* was dropped and *Illuminate* took its spot. Nadeau would be granted her appearance in the next episode, *She's Plotting Something*.
	+ There would also be an *Aether and the Darkness Falls* moment, but it was dropped as well for being too lengthy.
* When Mya thinks about her mind being cleansed, she references the Varien and Psylla song *FULL ASSAULT*.
* It is revealed that:
	+ Mya has officially fallen in love with Evie. She later comes out as bisexual in the episode.
	+ Mya had a crush on a boy named Benji Figglebarker. Benji has also hit puberty since he last spoke with Mya - instead of being voiced by Nicolas Cantu like he was in *Little Miss Perfect*, he is voiced by Justin Briner.
	+ Mya and Benji's crushes never surpassed mutual and the two always preferred being friends.
	+ Benji and his parents moved to Seattle for better job opportunities. The Figglebarkers are also psychologists, which Mya notes is probably why Benji is very well versed in psychology.
	+ Mya still feels guilty over the events of *Dancing in the Dark*.
	+ Benji always had a feeling Mya would fall for Evie.
	+ Evie bought a book for her and Mya to read together - *The Lost and the Powerful*.
	+ Unbeknownst to Mya, Evie has started to fall in love with her by the end of the episode.
* During Evie and Mya's walk, the Dodie song *She* plays in the background. *She* is notably written about a bisexual girl, paralleling how Dodie is bisexual in real life. The song is also a major Mya theme.
* One of Mya's comparisons to Winter is an allusion to the titles of two Feint songs: *Weavers* and *Fading Wind*.
* Some of the imagery and descriptions of the episode are reflective of Mya's state of mind and how she likes to fantasize.
	+ This is derived from Mya having ADD.
* When Mya describes how her parents encourage her, she references a famous quote from former United States First Lady Michelle Obama: "When they go low, we go high."
* After Mya goes to sleep following her coming out to her parents, she references four songs:
	+ *We Are One* by Rameses B
	+ *Space Boy* by Rameses B, Feint, and Veela
	+ *Chasing Daylight* by CloudNone and Direct
	+ *Collide* by Fractal
* Mya accidentally coming out to Benji prematurely was inspired by how Cyrus abruptly came out to Jonah when naming types of bread to him in *Andi Mack*.
* As Benji speaks to Mya over the phone and teases her over her crush on Evie, he references the viral meme "It was at this moment he knew... he fucked up."
* After Evie joins Mya in her bedroom and encourages her to come out, the Beatcore song *Just Stay* plays in the background. Afterward, it is followed by the Duumu song *Illuminate*, and Evie quotes the sample inserted in the middle of the song: "It's terrific, I'm so proud of you."
* "Tuyệt vời" translates to "fantastic" in Vietnamese.
* Evie telling Mya that she's dancing with the universe is a nod to the Anevo and Laura Brehm song *Universe*.
* Evie painting a picture of Mya in her mind is a reference to *We Won't Be Alone*, which was previously referenced in *Daze Runners*.