Waldo

**Waldo** is the head of Toxic-Food Processing and one of the Sorrows of Death Inc., and the third boss in *Have a Nice Death*.

## Description

**Waldo - Head of the Toxic Food-Processing Department**

With the resounding success of voracity curses, the concept of "starving to death" has come back into style, declaring a new millennium of horrors to decimate the living. Always at the forefront of innovation, Death is turning the problem on its head by taking inspiration from the 20th-century food processing revolution. The fast food chain *Waldo Burger®* made its fortune by offering cheap sandwiches made of fat, sugar and salt, and scented with delicious chemical aromas that deadened all manner of reason. Death later took the soul of a young employee who was, fortunately, trapped in a walk-in freezer in a Waldo's next-to-a-highway. He wasn't especially astonished, or even put off, by discovering the company. The goals were more or less the same: production, production and re-production after that.

On the other hand, Death concedes that he recruited the young man *in a hurry*, which meant cutting through some red tape. For example, none of the managers of Death Inc. are able to give the real last name of the Head of the Toxic-Food Processing Department, nor his first name. People developed the habit of calling the young man "Waldo" as the former server closely resembled the mascot of that restaurant chain. It was said contemptuously that "*anyway, everyone working at Waldo had to be called Waldo, right? Brainwashing must be so intense that you even forget your own name and all those trade secrets that drove kids nuts*."

In the depths of the department, Waldo is working to recreate workspaces suitable for the development of new high-calorie commodities. He managed to have ice cream and pizza added to the list of "Five Daily Fruits and Vegetables" and instigated devastating slogans like "No Mercy for Croissants", "Highly Processed Food is a Friend for Life!" and the no less terrifying "Fat is Life". Waldo is not only a talented Sorrow who can balance the essentials of food factory culture with the company's philosophy. He's a bloody production machine who makes no distinction between work and passion. He's also the only one who knows the secret recipe for a banana-chocolate formilk-shake; really very good!

## Appearance

Waldo appears to be a cartoonish looking little boy. He is fairly big, being taller than Death himself. Waldo has light skin and wears a patterned cap at all times that covers his fairly curly hair. He has classic "cartoon style" eyes and large eyelashes with a snub nose and a small mouth but fairly large cheeks, as well as a large chin. Waldo wears a gray button-up shirt and black pants under a white apron alongside some black shoes. Waldo usually carries a platter laden with a disgusting stack of burgers with body parts sticking out of them and a huge scoop of ice cream on top.

In his phase one form, the entire lower half of his body is replaced with a spider-like, three-clawed robot body that presumably has a sauce bottle installed in it. In his phase two form, Waldo gains a more unhinged look, with his hair being more mussed as well as his eyes becoming less cartoonish and more frightening. His mouth is split into a jagged smile and he is armed with a red glowing chainsaw. Waldo can expand his face and eyes to look much simpler yet scary all the same. When Waldo is defeated, his chainsaw goes through his head, releasing a large amount of blood.

## Personality

Waldo at first is shown to have a friendly, if annoying, demeanor. Starting off with only giggling and singing bad songs, Waldo does not seem like much of a threat.

Once the fight actually begins, however, Waldo's true sadistic and cunning personality comes to the surface. He has a short temper if plans don't work quickly, which is shown by him breaking out of his robot body in frustration and attacking the player with a chainsaw if the player whittles down his health. Waldo is also quite psychotic, as evidenced by his maniacal laughter and ferocious swinging of his chainsaw throughout the fight. It also seems that he can get careless and clumsy if he gets angry enough as shown by how his fingers slip and he gets a chainsaw through his head at the end of the fight.

Waldo shows very little care for safety, poisoning his customers with disgusting "meat" to lead them closer to death. He only cares about production, as evidenced by his motto and his songs.

## Boss Battle Attacks

* **Phase One**: Waldo will transform into a robotic claw-spider.

* **Claw Stab**: Waldo will stab twice with his claw in front of him. This attack can be dodged easily just by getting away from him, but if you get behind him you can land a few hits.

* **Homing Bombs**: Waldo will shoot two homing bombs out of his sauce shooter and then will remain idle until the bombs explode. These bombs home in on the player in short bursts, pausing between each move. It's best not to hit Waldo at all during this attack as the bombs are fairly difficult to dodge and keep track of.

* **Chainsaw Wall**: Waldo will shoot a length of chainsaw into the ground, causing a chainsaw wall to rise up in front of the player, forcing them to dash through it. Waldo will usually remain idle for a bit after this attack so you can get some hits in.

* **Claw Spin**: Waldo will go to one end of the arena and spin his claws sideways, turning into a huge fan. He will travel across about three quarters of the arena before stopping in midair and planting his feet at the end. The best way to dodge this attack is to get behind Waldo as he starts moving forward. Another safe spot would be at the opposite end of the arena, as when he plants his claws down, it does not do any damage to the player. It is possible to dash through him in "fan" mode but fairly difficult so it is not recommended.

* **Sauce Shoot**: Waldo will point his sauce gun in the player's direction, low to the ground and horizontal before shooting. This attack can be dodged by jumping and dashing over the sauce beam or getting behind Waldo.

## Trivia

* Waldo is most likely based off of a restaurant mascot called Big Boy that also made a cameo in the movie Austin Powers.

* Should you defeat Waldo or run into in enough times, Death will talk to Jocelyn about Waldo only recently received cybernetic enhancements by Jacob and Orville. Death also hints to this in one of his victory lines should you defeat Waldo in one of your runs.

* It is possible that Waldo is still retained the appearance of his original self despite his assumed enhancements, as he shows signs of a blood-like substance when he dies, unlike most Thanagers and Sorrows. (Making Waldo the third boss as of now to show signs being able to bleed. Others being Heisenberg and Denzel, both of who's deaths coincidentally involved them exploding.)

* Waldo does not seem to have much care for his Thanagers, often only bringing them up after their deaths and at time mocking them.