New York City

Five, aka Beauregard, is given the task of shoving the United States into the Great Depression. Will he succeed?

## Plot

### America's Most ~~Rubbish~~ Famous City

Five lands in a farmland in New Haven, startling a farmer. The farmer goes to the smashed pile of hay where Five is, and asks where the hell he came from. The Farmer's daughter asks if he fell from heaven. The farmer tells his daughter to move along. He then asks where he is, and the farmer mentions that he is in New Haven, Connecticut. Five mentions that he has to go to New York City. The farmer tells him that he has to take a shipment to New York City, and he'll take him. The farmer asks where he came from, and Five mentions that he was shot out of a cannon on a war boat.

The farmer arrives in New York City, where he drops off Five. Five thanks the farmer and asks his name. The farmer mentions that his name is Probst Wyatt II, and that his wife recently had a son. Five tells Probst to take care, and Probst exchanges the same thing. Probst then heads into the store to drop off the produce. As he walks the streets, he looks around in amazement of 1920s New York. He then hears a gun shot and is left startled. He then sees an Italian gangster running and grabs him. Five asks what he just did, before the gangster breaks free and runs away. Five then turns around to see an old man on the ground.

He approaches the old man and his son, and notices that the man had been shot. Five mentions that he will call the police and have the man escorted to the Hospital. He then runs to a payphone as the son is left traumatized. He calls the police, and Detective Veidt answers. Five informs Veidt that a man has been shot, and needs to be transported to the Hospital. Veidt mentions that there is nothing he can do, before trying to hang up the phone, only to mention that he knows who Veidt is and that he'll die if he doesn't send help.

Detective Veidt arrives and has the old man sent to the Hospital. At the Hospital, Five enters the room, as the old man's three sons arrive. The youngest, Michael, asks who he is, and five mentions that he was the one who called the emergency. Michael then says that he can leave, and Five mentions that he wants to see if the old man is okay. Detective Veidt mentions that the old man is fine, and that he is under arrest for threatening a Police Officer. As Veidt prepares to arrest Five, Five punches Veidt and flees the Hospital, impressing Michael.

### I Fought The Law

Five runs through the streets of New York, as Veidt exits the Hospital. Veidt chases after Five. Five then runs through the alley. Veidt spots Five and chases him down the alley. Five steals a beer bottle from a hobo and tosses it at Veidt, hitting him in the head. Veidt falls unconscious, as Five heads down Central Park. He then stops and looks around. He then slows down, only to be spotted by NYCP. He continues running and exits Central Park. Five makes it to the edge of the city and jumps into the water. The police stops, and Inspector Harry Gadget tells them to return to the Department and to pick up Veidt from the alley.

Five spots a sewer and starts to swim to it. He climbs into the sewer system, and walks into complete darkness. As he continues to walk, he realizes the stench coming from the sewer. He then hears subway sirens and begins to run, only to trip over a log. He gets up and hears a growl. He then begins to run as the water begins to splash. He runs into the Subway system, where he discovers that he was being chased by a sewer gator. He then trips and tries to escape the gator, only for the gator to be ran over by a subway train. Five then gets up and runs to the nearest Subway station.

Five then travels the streets of New York, and runs into Michael Corleone, who offers to take him in. Five thanks Michael for the offer, but declines. Five then continues to walk down the streets of New York. He then enters a restaurant, and buys some food. A man stares at Five, and asks if he had a rough day. Five mentions that he got a man who had been shot sent to the Hospital, threatened a Police Officer, ran away from the Police, and was nearly consumed by a Sewer Gator. The man mentions that he's had a hell of a day, and Five mentions that he's only been in New York for 3 hours.

The man laughs, and introduces himself as Jarod Mancini, and Five introduces himself as Beauregard Statham. Jarod mentions that he and his wife had recently moved into their apartment in the Bronx, and that he could stay with them if he doesn't have a place to stay. Five agrees to live with Jarod and his wife, and he is served his meal, which includes a steak. Five and Jarod begin to eat their meals, and Harry and Brian enter the restaurant. Five then tries to cover himself, as Brian and Harry talk to each other in a booth. Five then pays for his meal, and leaves. Jarod finishes his meal and follows Five.

Jarod asks Five why he left, and Five mentions that the cop that was there was the one he threatened. Jarod begins to chuckle and mentions that New York has a nickname: Hell's Kitchen. Jarod mentions that his brother Marvin had been in trouble with the Police ever since the Family landed in America. Five then follows Jarod to his home in The Bronx.

### The Mancinis

Five and Jarod enter the Mancini's apartment, where Jarod introduces Five to his wife, Moira. Jarod mentions that Moira was one of the very few Irish folk who weren't driven out of New York. Moira mentions that America is full of Racist Bastards, but she came mainly to escape the sickness in Ireland. Five mentions that he was born in England, and his father "Served in World War I". Jarod mentions that it was a hell of a mess, and mentions that his brother died in France, saving his commander from a frag grenade.

Five mentions that he will probably get some sleep, and Moira mentions that he can sleep in the living room. Five then falls asleep on the couch, as Moira and Jarod begin to talk about Five. Jarod mentions that he's a good man, while Moira mentions that he looks like one of the men who murdered her father and mother in Manhattan. Jarod mentions that he's only been in New York for 6 hours. Moira mentions that she's going to sleep, and Jarod follows her. As both begin to get into bed, Jarod proposes to have sex, and Moira mentions that there's a stranger in the house. Five mentions that he doesn't mind, as long as they don't migrate to the living room couch. Five then begins to hear as Jarod and Moira have sex, loudly.

A woman walks down the streets of New York back to her home. She is approached by a gangster and asks if he could escort her home. The woman, Nina Drago, declines and continues walking. The gangster stops her and mentions that he knows that she's an escort, and is willing to not tell the cops in exchange for a night with her. Nina mentions that she doesn't trust gangsters, and walks away. The gangster then nods and two men approach Nina and kidnap her. The gangster mentions that she should've done what he wanted.

The next morning, Five tells Jarod that he's going to find a job, so he doesn't have to feel like a free loader. Jarod mentions that he knows someone, and Five mentions that he already knows what he's going to do. As Jarod and Five walk out into the street, Five asks what Jarod does for a living. Jarod mentions that he's a journalist, working for New York Time. Five then tells Jarod good luck on his investigations, as both part ways. Five then walks down an alley, only to find a dead body on the ground.

### Fives

Harry and Brian arrive, and Harry takes pictures with his hat. Brian mentions that the guy who threatened him called in abut the dead body. Harry asks why he trusts someone who assaulted him, and Brian mentions that after a while, he realized that the caller had saved him from dying of expired food poisoning. Five then approaches the men and asks what's going on. Harry asks Five why he would like to know, and Five mentions that Commissioner Duke had him become a police officer.

Harry mentions that he found a symbol on the body, belonging to the Cremisi Gang. Brian mentions that the Cremisi Gang are Italians gangsters who act like sex-crazed Jack the Rippers. They go around at night, looking for escorts and abduct them and take them to an unknown location, eventually raping the hell out of them and dumping their murdered corpses around New York a month later. Five asks if that is the only thing they do, and Brian mentions that they also tattoo the corpses with their logo, and use the spilt blood of Escorts and murdered cops to paint their known territories with encoded messages.

Five asks what kind of encoded messages, and Harry mentions that he doesn't know. Five asks to see the encoded messages. Brian orders Harry to show him the photos. Harry hands Five the folder containing the pictures, and Five looks at them. Five mentions that he is willing to take over the case, so the others can focus on busting other criminals. Brian and Harry look at each other, and Harry asks if it is wise to let the newbie try, and Brian mentions that they'll have to spitball if he is unlike other cops or not. Harry mentions that he doubts that Five will break the case.

### The Cremisi Gang Files

Brian introduces Fives to his new room. Five thanks Brian, before Brian gives Fives all the files involving the Cremisi Gang. Fives once again thanks Brian, before Brian leaves. Five then goes over the files. He then begins to read the first file, involving a teen girl named "Sara Miskins", date: September 3, 1924. Five mentions that her corpse was found hanging from a small apartment building in Queens, with her head severed. Her blood was used to make a symbol, with her severed head being "glued" (See Notes) to the center of the symbol. Her corpse was taken to a morgue where it was discovered that she originated from Canada, and her sister is currently in "Hill Valley".

Five then begins to read the file for "Sgt. Kenneth Brauser", Date: January 1, 1925. In Sgt. Brauser's file, it mentions that he was on the investigation, before being ganged up and murdered by the Cremisi Gang. His remains were discovered by Brian Veidt in Central Park's Zoo. He pulls up another file, belonging to "Marianne Smithers", dated June 29, 1927. It mentions that Marianne was a prostitute working in Staten Island. She was approached by Daniel Incornaretti, who asked her to prostitute for The Cremisi Gang. It mentions that she refused, and she was abducted and severely brutalized by the Cremisi Gang. Her remains were then found at the base of the Statue of Liberty, her blood used to make a circle around the Statue.

Five then pulls the fourth and last file belonging to "Officer Malarkey", dated December 1, 1927. It mentions that Officer Malarkey had infiltrated the Cremisi Gang, and learned of their secret headquarters. Officer Malarkey then made a map where to find the paper containing the location of the Cremisi Gang. It then mentions that he was assassinated by The Cremisi Gang and his remains were found in the Subway systems of Manhattan, alongside his wife and adolescent son. Five then begins to think about Officer Malarkey's portion of the investigation.

Five leaves his office and asks Brian if Officer Malarkey ever left a map, and Brian mentions that if he did, they wouldn't be on the investigation ever longer. Five then begins to think even more, before going to get a cup of coffee. After he returns, he begins to think, and even writes on the map of New York City. Five then leaves to Malarkey's old home with Harry, and return with nothing. Five asks if Malarkey still has any old files, and Brian hands him some. Five thanks Brian, before returning to his office.

Five then places Malarkey's files on his desk and begins looking through. It shows that Malarkey had written down the investigation locations. Five thinks before placing the incidence locations involving the Cremisi Gang on the NYC map. He then begins to draw a triangle, before doing math to find the center of the triangle. Excited, Five tells Brian and Harry that he's found a lead. Brian then tells Commissioner Duke, who tells Brian to assign Agent Bishop to accompany Five on his investigation. Brian then walks back to Five's office and introduces Five to Agent Alida Bishop. TO BE CONTINUED...

## Featured Characters

* Five/ Beauregard Statham
* Probst Wyatt II
* Probst's Daughter
* Corleone Family
	+ Frederick Corleone
	+ Vito Corleone
	+ Santiago Corleone
	+ Michael Corleone
* Detective Brian Veidt
* Inspector Harry Gadget
* Jarod Mancini
* Moira Mancini
* Gangster
* Nina Drago
* Alida Bishop

## Soundtrack

* "I'm sitting on top of the world" by Al Jolson

## Episode Casualties

* Sara Miskins
* Sgt. Kenneth Brauser
* Marianne Smithers
* Officer Malarkey

## Notes

* YES, there is a reference to Inspector Gadget here. Deal with it.
* There is also one for The Godfather.
* Wyatt from Wolfenstein is mentioned.
* There is a reference to Back to the Future: The Game in this episode.
* When it says glued, it means that they smashed the head up against the wall till the blood dried and caused the head to remain stuck on the side of the building.