Bernard

Bernard, also known as Bernard the Bullshit Bear, is one of the main characters on Show Shredders, who always points out the first error of every episode.

## Bernard

### Enemies

Reginald Paddington, Lester, Chester, Wildthing (occasionally)

### Likes

Pointing out and nitpicking bullshit in crappy media, correcting others, criticizing without any bias

### Dislikes

Anything insensible in media, repeating himself to those who don't remember what he says, airports, public transit, anything that doesn't make sense in general

## Bio

### Episode 1:

He first appears in episode 1, in which Herman and Sherman are not expecting his appearance. However, after introducing himself, they agree to let him help with their review of Wonky Whistle, knowing how terrible it's going to be.

### Episode 2:

Bernard makes his second appearance in episode 2, which is also unintended. However, Herman and Sherman are overjoyed to have him back, and realize that they will need his help for this episode as well. This is the first episode in which he points out a Double Bullshit alert, as well as have a Bullshit Alert text appear at the top of the screen every time he says that phrase. He points out bullshit in the episode until the very end, where he uses his new method of rating stuff--the Bullshit Scale--to give Fiery Flynn a rating of Maximum Bullshit.

### Episode 3:

Bernard makes his third appearance in episode 3, and is this time considered one of the main characters of the show, seeing as he corrects Officer Pluie while he's doing his disclaimer, and tells him what he's supposed to say instead. He also kicks Wildthing out of the studio when he makes a ridiculous request for the disclaimer. In this episode, Herman and Sherman expect him to appear as soon as they start the review, with his starting line for every episode, "Wow, already I have so much faith in this." He then requests that they render his image in High Definition, as the "crappy Standard Definition image of him won't cut it." They call Shelldon, have him render the image, and he says it's much better. This is the first episode in which he notices *two* Triple Bullshit Alerts in each of the episodes they're reviewing. This is also the first episode to feature his official Bullshit Scale, which looks different and more detailed than the one shown in episode 2. Bernard will continue to appear in every episode, using this same formula when he appears and points things out.

## Personality

Bernard is picky, easily agitated, and annoyed by anything insensible that occurs in his life and in any form of media. He has very high standards, sophisticated tastes, and low tolerance for stupidity and childish behaviour. Bernard is also a bit egotistical at times, claiming that he is better than all his colleagues. However, Bernard usually has good manners. Bernard is somewhat of a control freak and has no faith and trust in others, often feeling he has to step in to prevent them from fucking up. Bernard is very intelligent and studious. As a critic, Bernard has absolutely no biases. He is very opinionated. Bernard also has no biases when he makes a review.

## Role in Show Shredders

Bernard--since episode 3--has been considered a main character. He appears in every episode of Show Shredders, and always starts the actual review off by pointing out the first flaw of the episode or movie by saying "Wow, already I have so much faith in this." Whenever he sees anything wrong with the episode, he says "Bullshit Alert." Sometimes, if there are a couple or multiple flaws in one scene, he will say "Double Bullshit Alert," "Triple Bullshit Alert," and even "Quadruple Bullshit Alert." While Herman and Sherman always give a rating for each episode a certain number out of ten, Bernard uses his own method of rating known as the Bullshit Scale, in which he rates the episode or movie a certain level of bullshit, or sometimes, when the form of media goes off the bullshit scale in terms of how terrible it is, he gives it a special rating, which is usually some kind of turd. He also always tells the audience to tune in next time, and tells them what Herman and Sherman will be reviewing.

## Relationships with Other Characters

### Herman & Sherman

Bernard considers Herman and Sherman his only true friends, as they seem to be the only two guys who have something in common with him; reviewing crappy media. Bernard, however, does get annoyed with them at times when he feels that they're being too generous with something that he feels is not the least bit good. He can also swear at them, such call Herman a jackass when he's not understanding his sarcasm. Nevertheless, they are still the two only guys Bernard actually likes, while he hates mostly everybody and everything.

### Wildthing

Although he doesn't really hate him, Bernard can get easily annoyed with him, which is shown when Wildthing fails to give Bernard enough information on what is wrong with Ted when he is having a heart attack. He also feels WIldthing can be a real idiot at times, such as when he feels they need to acknowledge the enduring presence of natives on the studio's land when they're already tight on camera time as it is, and using the word "inbred" without knowing what it means. Bernard always tries his best to help Wildthing learn from his mistakes so he does not make them a second time.

### Ted

Bernard does not get nearly annoyed with Ted like he does with Wildthing; he just is puzzled as to how Ted is able to come back to life after he dies.

### Reginald Paddington

Bernard absolutely hates Reginald's guts, and wishes he would just die. This is mainly because Reginald steals his jacket, and the fact that his occupation is being a "professional douchebag." and constantly interrupts the reviews to announce that he's an asshole, and to root for the characters in the episode that are being like him. Whenever Reginald interrupts the review three times in one episode, Bernard sends Bruce to beat him up, which keeps him away for the rest of the episode. In episode 4, Bernard invents something called the "Douche Buster," which keeps track of how many times Reginald interrupts the review, which adds a strike each time he does, and after the Douche Buster gets three strikes, Bruce will appear, and beat the crap out of Reginald, which will keep him away for the rest of the episode. Although Bernard does not try to instigate stuff for their rivalry, Reginald loves pissing him off, and always instigates everything.

### Lester & Chester

Bernard never really interacts with Lester and Chester, but it can be assumed that because he hates Reginald, he hates them as well, seeing as they're his lackeys.

### Bruce

It can be assumed that Bernard considers Bruce one of his friends, seeing as Bruce will always beat Reginald up if he pays him. Despite this, Bernard always gets enraged whenever Bruce calls him little, and says he has a Napoleon Complex when Bernard gets upset and bossy.

### Shelldon

Although it is not stated directly, it can be assumed that Bernard and Shelldon get along with each other fairly well, seeing as they were sitting together in the audience when WIldthing gets the Nobel Prize, agreeing that Shelldon should have gotten it instead of him. Bernard does however respect Shelldon's intellectual achievements and pursuits.

### Kingston

It can safely be assumed that Bernard is not the lest but fond of Kingston, seeing as Kingston was running the Nobel Prize event, and made Wildthing win it instead of Shelldon.

### Soto

It can safely be assumed that Bernard feels the same way about Soto as he does with Kingston, seeing as Soto was helping Kingston run the Nobel Prize Ceremony when Wildthing won.

## Trivia

* Bernard always points out the first error in every review.
* Bernard being British is a reference to the fact that he was bought in a store in London, England, from a famous department store known as Harrods.
* Bernard's hobbies are research and reading. He also enjoys crossword puzzles.
* Bernard may be insecure about his height as he got upset when Bruce called him little.
	+ However, Bruce may have been calling Bernard a minor, which would logically piss him off since Bernard considers himself anything but immature.

* Bernard is an atheist.