Dr. Whiskers' Lab of Fun

## **Dr. Whiskers' Lab of Fun** *by Psychopasta*

Have you ever caught a glimpse of something on TV as a kid, and you felt like your being drawn to it? I don't mean like in the most evil way possible like other Urban Legends surrounding the topic, such as, 1999, or Channel Zero. But in a way that only a child would understand. The only way to watch this particular show that I am discussing, is that if you'd change the channel to, Channel 100. Funny, all the other channels before Channel 100 are nothing but static and white noise. Many kids would love the show, even though the channel their watching on is strange enough to be something more than a coincidence. The show would premier in the morning, as any children's program would, and like most children's shows like Mutt and Stuff, the children would be in the show, learning basic stuff the show would like for them to learn about. Basically your typical learning activity. This show is about how to make someone feel better or about health issues like, the common cold, or minor injuries like a fractured spinal column.

And to be honest... I was one of those kids.

When I was eleven years old, I appeared on set as one of the children who came to learn simple medical techniques, or how the human body functions. The show was called, "Dr. Whiskers' Lab of Fun". A very sketchy name for kid's standards. The cast members were just people in anthropomorphic animal costumes, the main character being a blue tabby cat with white stripes. He had large, almond shaped green eyes with glasses around the irises, like any cartoon character with glasses. Black pupils were slit. He wore a wide, toothy smile with sharp, pointy teeth. The long line in the middle of the teeth was sideways and went in a zig-zag, making it look like he has sharp teeth. He has the cleanest lab coat I had ever seen, almost as if he was in the light, the coat would blind us. He has a green, collard shirt with colored pens in his shirt pocket, and wore black pants. He wore no shoes though, but he wore a tie with red and white stripes, making look like a candy cane. For my opinion, he kind of reminded me of Professor Genki from Saints Row the Third, but he was blue instead of pink. He would talk like Joe from Blue's Clues, I thought it was him in that cat suit, but many kids said that they didn't know what he looked like under that large cat mask of his. The weird part is, there was no studio crew, no cameramen, no soundmen, no directors, zilch. Just the people in animal costumes. The children looked at each other in confusion at first, and so did I.

"Who's directing this joint anyway?" A boy asked me in a Superman T-shirt,

"I don't know, maybe on lunch break." I answered his question.

We looked and saw him walking through a door with the name, "Dr. Whiskers", in the middle of a huge star, and the kids ran up to him and gave him hugs. Me and the boy in the Superman T-shirt just walked up to the cheering crowd. We were cool kids and we just came to this God forsaken studio in Hollywood California, just so our parents would get filthy, stinkin' rich. Course we needed the money. Is that what it's all about? Anyway, as we said our hello's and after telling us what we needed to do, he handed us our scripts and lines. And after the painstaking process of remembering what the script was telling us, we got ready. And it was lights, camera, action.

The stage was colorful, it was setup to be a hospital. The walls was orange with purple polka-dots on them, the floor was orange just like the wall, the table was a deep shade of red, and the door was blue and oddly misshapen. It was like something out of a Ronald McDonald commercial. Being a middle aged man now, I still think it was weird. After performing for the kids watching this dumb, bizarre shit at home, this was the part where we come in. We did our lines correctly and learned basic medical lessons on how to know if a guy was injured. Course me and the boy already know this, so we didn't need the script for this one. Then a man in a brown dog suit with scrubs came in. He reminded us of McGruff the Crime Dog if he was a surgeon. He carried a guy in a lizard costume, he was apparently the patient, with the nurse, a anthropomorphic white female cat, close behind. We stood around the guy and saw the cause of distress. He was having heart problems, so it was up to us to perform open heart surgery. I know it's fucked up, I was thinking the same thing. But to my surprise, it was like a game of Operation, we plucked out a few pieces of silly things like, a bird, a piece of pork wrapped up in tinfoil, a French fry, and an opera singing fish. I know what your thinking, 'What in the flying fuck?'. As stated before, I was thinking the same thing. After hours of horrible jokes and hours of trying to be funny, the show escalades into madness. Patients rushed in, doctors and nurses helped us pluck out random items such as a gold tooth, a pony, and a boom box that was stuck inside a bull's head. I mean, what the hell was going on?! Was the creators high, I mean what in the Ice Cold Hell?!

After what seemed like forever, it finally ends with Dr. Whiskers saying, "And remember, stay healthy as a horse, and have a nice day!" Thank God! After it ended, me and that boy couldn't of been more happier. Even though while it was filming, me and the boy were puzzled, confused, and didn't know what to make of it all. The reason we were smiling, laughing and grinning, is because during the episode, we were secretly making jokes saying, "Hopefully his medical bills are through the roof!" and "What are we going to do with this, we can't shove it up our ass!". And as it ended, Dr. Whiskers said thank you and said that we will do this tomorrow morning at 5:00 AM. And he didn't even pay us! Me and the boy looked at each other in total disgust, and we wanted to cuss out the blue cheapskate! But, that would be jeopardizing our jobs, so we just walked off. Me and the boy stayed at an apartment in one of those hotels. I was from New Jersey, and he lived in Ohio. His name was Ivan, and he is twelve years old. He was older than me, so he showed me the ropes around the fucked up place we performed in. He even told me that the theme song for the show was something like circus music, you know, Do-do- do do do do-do-do-do, something along those lines. I don't know, the show was bizarre. Anyway, as tomorrow came and we got to the studio, Dr. Whiskers was waiting for us. He told us that today is going to be different. He showed us why. He said that the last actor portraying the lizard patient was sick and needed someone to take his place, and asked for volunteers. All the kids raised their hands and said loudly, jumping up and down with their hands waving in the air, "Me! Me! Pick me! Pick me!" Me and Ivan just shook our heads with arms folded.

And he pointed at... at Ivan, and said, "You, you will be his replacement."

What?! How the Fu- he didn't even raise a finger! He took Ivan to a room where it reads, "Employees Only", in big, bold letters. I became irate by this, I said out loud, "Is there any directors here seeing this shit?!" I stormed off outside to cool down, and came back to be handed with scripts again. And yet again, we participated in what insanity the show had presented us with. After the show ends again, I went and looked for Ivan in the backstage to congratulate him. I said mockingly with a chuckle, "Hey Ivan! Hope he hasn't molested ya!"

Then I stopped laughing as I heard Ivan... softly crying, coughing, and gagging...

"Ivan...? Are you ok...?"

I began to get worried, I walked up to him and touched his gloved hand. He was still in the lizard suit, strapped in the gurney he was taken on stage in. I took off the large lizard mask and... Jesus fucking Christ...! Ivan was coughing up blood, and he was on the verge of dying! His eyes fixated on me, and he said painfully as he had hot tears streaming from his eyes, and blood trickled from his mouth...

"... Help me... Please... Help me..."

I was in a loss of words, I was trembling in fear! I tore open the costume and saw the cause of his pain, his stomach was torn open, exposing his rib cage and stomach cavity! I began to whimper and cuffed my mouth with my hands, I ran from the backstage shrieking for help, "HELP! HELP!"

Dr. Whiskers went up to me and said, "I can help!"

I looked at the man and snapped at him, "No! Not you! I need a doctor!"

He must of not get it in his head that Ivan is dying in the backstage, he said, "But I AM a doctor."

"No you dumbass!" I said, annoyed by this idiot's remark, "I need a professional, medical attention! Ivan is cut open and you JOKE about it?!"

He let out a small laugh and said, "Ivan's not hurt, he's just playing a small part of what I assume, is the role-play of his career! You'll know soon enough."

"Role-play?!" I asked, "You're telling me that Ivan is acting?! But his stomach was cu-"

"Cut open?" Dr. Whiskers interrupted, "Oh that's just some special effects we have for the gore, pretty realistic huh?"

I just looked at the psycho, shaking my head. I knew Ivan's dying, and this sick bastard lied to me, saying that it was just props! After going back to my hotel and called the police, they took Ivan to an ambulance and head for the hospital, and the cops found no one by the name of Dr. Whiskers. The studio was vacant of any people in animal costumes, but found the children with film equipment. How did they just vanish so fast? I have know fucking clue. After a few weeks, I stayed the fuck away from that studio. But there was some urge telling me about the place, something luring me to it. So that night, I went with dad to the movies, and saw... Dr. Whiskers... He was standing under a street light in the parking lot. I blinked, and he vanished as I quickly opened my eyes. When I got inside the theater and walked passed a cardboard cutout of Batman, Superman and Wonder woman, that cat nurse appeared from behind it, like she had walked through a door hidden by it. I blinked. This wasn't possible. She walked behind a thin cardboard cutout but didn't come in from the other side.

I should have stayed home.

I hoped they would just go away, but they didn't. Pretending nothing happened was easier than the truth. As I watched Batman V. Superman: Dawn of Justice, the guy in the dog costume appeared from behind a person going to his seat, and vanished behind another. I shook my head in disbelief. My dad asked me what was wrong. I told a lie, saying that I was just tired. After watching the film, I couldn't figure out what the hell was going on. Nobody see the people in animal costumes, but I can. It was as if they were invisible to the human eye. But they can be seen by children, them being me. I finally picked up enough courage to fend off this... this presence of what I can recall is haunting and disturbing. So after telling my parents that Ivan's sister is going to pick me up from a bus stop for a little visit, I rode my bike to whatever the presence was telling me to go. With my weapons in my backpack, I rode my bike to the same exact studio I was filmed in.

I went inside and called out to them. After shining my flashlight everywhere, I heard a little girl saying, "Don't go in there."

After shining my light to the source, it was a girl about five years old.

"Why not?" I said, "Did he hurt you?"

"No," She said, "But HE will..."

She pointed at the monster known, as Dr. Whiskers, with terror on her face.

"So... You finally come at last..." He said, under that cat mask with that shit eating grin.

"Why are you doing this? Ivan didn't deserve this! Nobody Deserves this." I said, trying not to let him come closer as he made his advance towards me.

"Ivan put up a struggle as he was surgically cut, so we had to strap him down so he wouldn't move. Or it would've been messy."

"So you were the one who made the original actor go missing? And now you're telling me, that Ivan had the same fate?" I asked.

"Sure, why not?" He replied, "After all, he wasn't paying attention to our little lesson. So I gave him a lesson... He won't soon forget..."

After he said this, my blood ran cold. I couldn't believe this fucking asshole had cut up my best friend, tortured him and left him for dead!

"I'm not afraid of you. I've seen worse than your 'practical effects'."

"Oh? How about this?"

He pulled off his mask, and what I saw turned my bravery, into full-on horror! I dropped my flashlight as I saw Dr. Whiskers pull off his cat mask to reveal... Nothing but the creature's flesh and a feline skull! It was wet and oozing this wet fescues in different parts of his fleshy body, and I could hear his heart beat inside the costume! The costume was the creatures own skin!

"How about now...?" The monster asked menacingly, finally seeing my reaction change.

The creature smiled with his flesh on his feline face twisting into a wide grin, just like the mask as he said those words. I saw the other characters do the same thing, they revealed their hideous facades, turning into that of something that penetrates the human soul. I tried to run out the studio, but the door wouldn't budge, something was blocking it. I saw them with power tools and scalpels. The monster said to 'Fix me', and they kept coming towards me with surgical tools. I screamed and banged on the door, hoping that someone would hear me.

As I looked back, I saw other characters I didn't notice before, they were coming from the misshapen door. I saw a tiger in the same scrubs as the dog, I saw a monkey in a clown suit, I saw a gold fish in a lab coat with a water bowl on his head, and a horned owl in a brown suit (I think it was the manager). They're hideous fleshy faces same as their masks, even the fish's fleshy face didn't help, looking like the fleshy face of a piranha. I continued to bang and scream, but nothing happened. Then they got a hold of me, I kicked and screamed, I rolled around, trying to knock them off me! But the more I struggled, the more aggressive they've become. As I finally ran and barged through the door with my shoulder with a few cuts on my body from the struggle, I ran and ran, and ran till I thought my lungs would burst! Not once have I looked back.

I made it home with a few battle scars, I finally turned, hoping they'd be still after me. But they were gone. I ran inside and hugged my family, tears in my eyes. I told them everything, the whole shebang. They'd never believe me with the paranormal shit, but the part they did believe, was the part with Ivan and the guy who portrayed the patient. The show was still there on Channel 100.

But... What I found out years later, as I grew up... The kids were watching dead air this whole time. And there was no such thing as Dr. Whiskers' Lab of Fun. Guess I was scaring myself to death. But there was one question that made me uneasy...

If it was all my imagination... Then how did I get all these cuts...?