Chester Chestnut

Chester was quite the boisterous character. A brutish bloke, nothing could slow him down and he seemed nigh invincible. His strength was almost unchartable, always carrying large sacks of muffins door to door to sell, hundreds and hundreds of pounds of muffins a day. The freak could let any attack simply roll right off of him, and he made his living harming all the rich in town.

## Early life

As a young man, Chester had two loves: pulling the wool over the eyes of the rich, and baking. His father had been another great baker, and his mother too. He spent many a night gorging himself on the wonderful breads and pastries his hardworking Shanduchan father and Los Lobian mother made in their little shop. Sure, the struggle for control raged all around, but love could cross any political lines, especially when there were sweets involved! His mother did her best to teach little Chester to speak the Los Lobos language just like her, especially since her Shanduchan was quite rotten. His father George was a Shanduchan Northerner from Sheffield who had come to seek his way in America as a mercenary, but he unexpectedly settled down with his dear wife Tess after eating an absolutely life changing banketstaaf she had given him one cold night. From that night on, George and Tess were joined together at the hip and opened their own little pastry shop; Tess doing all the cooking and George doing his best to hold open the store front and speak to all the customers for Tess. Little Chester soon followed along and got bigger and bigger each day!

Sadly, the mercenaries never left the little shop in peace, and the twisted public officials constantly wanted bribes to offer “protection” to the little store in this nasty town, and Chester began to hate the upper class just as much as he loved his sweets. So, little Chester began to plot his life course. He would bake muffins, sweets, anything he could use to get a door in on the rich and tempt them into his playing hands… and rob them blind…

## Career

So, he started his plan and soon had secretly become one of the most wealthy burglars in American hiltstory. While most cat burglars and whatnot rely on their stealth, Chester relies on his sweets. He always carries the absolute most scrumptious delights, laced with powerful sleeping powders. Selling them door to door in rich neighborhoods, he makes a pretty penny for his perfect confections. But, once he has the confidence of the homeowner, he slips in the drugged muffins free of charge… and slides inside to rob you blind of any vaults or valuables once you hit the floor.

He is a master lockpicker and no vault is safe. In the past 15 years, he has amassed millions of dollars in jewels, valuables, bank deeds and more. He simply has them stashed away, waiting to be of use one day. His goal has never been to become rich or use his funds to help any one of the nations, but to simply be as much a pain to those filthy politicians as possible and make them suffer for all the war taxes they shoved on his parents over the years. No one even suspects that the most successful thief in all of Chicago is actually the portly baker with that goofy smile, big mustache and thick glasses. But, no lock is safe when he is around and nobody will take him down without a severe amount of force due to his immense girth.

Until PG Copper that is.

## Ojinjintka

*Main article: Ojinjintka*

Chester Chestnut was one of the few seemingly trustworthy people Ojinjintka had ever encountered, so when she was in dire need of help, he was one of the few she called upon for aid. While attempting to help her rescue her brother Mato from a Los Lobian prison, they learned it was all a trap orchestrated by PG Copper and the Los Lobos government to bring Ojinjintka out of hiding. In the ambush, while most of the crew got away, Chester heroically took a bullet for the team.

Never one to fuss too long, Louise Ochoa stole the lockpicking kit off his corpse.

## Legacy

Chester's reputation of being the greatest pastry chef of all time led to a nationwide obsession with muffins, as the rich and elite couldn't possibly get enough of them. In the aftermath of his death, parts of Shanducha and Los Lobos were so overwhelmed with grief at the loss of his muffins that entire companies and research laboratories formed, desperately trying to recreate the perfection and sweetness of his irresistible confections.

Some claim this absolute passion for Chester's muffins, and the resulting sorrow of their loss, is the cause for the eventual emergence of sugar worship, though sugar worshipers claim this statement is a blasphemy.