Future Nick

**Future Nick** (AKA "**Nick Starr**") is a minor character in Seasons 1 and 2 before becoming one of the two secondary antagonists of Season 4 alongside the Depression Kitty. the future version of Nick Birch, who has become a famous and successful multi-millionaire off of making hit TV shows. He first appeared in "Am I Gay?". He is voiced by Nick Kroll.

## Biography

Future Nick first appeared in the episode "Am I Gay?", in an imagination sequence had by Andrew after kissing the present-day version of Nick. Andrew imagined what his life would be like when he has to tell his grandchildren about the time he had his first kiss. In Andrew's imagination sequence, Future Andrew as an old grandpa was telling his three grandkids about how his first kiss was with their honorary uncle, Nick. Andrew's sole granddaughter recognized Nick as the famous celebrity, "Nick Starr", the host of the hit game show, "Count Down to Money With Nick Starr". Nick Starr was then shown hosting his game show, wherein a team of two humanoids faced off against a team of two robots, for ownership of the Most Glorious Kingdom of China Bitcoin Units. Nick Starr would utilize his famous catchphrases such as "Shake your booty." and "你好!" (*Nǐ hǎo!*) which means *hello* in Mandarin.

In "Drug Buddies", Nick and Jessi got high off of weed Jessi stole from her dad, and Nick would have a vivid hallucination of going to a dark and dystopian future, in a barren and lifeless wasteland called The Alone Zone. There, he came across his future self, who happily welcomed him to his future. Nick Starr would have become a highly successful billionaire after making a hit TV show on *Nitflex*, which was a cartoon based on his life as a kid. (This is obviously a fourth-wall-breaking moment, referencing the show itself.) This show made him rich enough to buy a fancy mansion. Future Nick explained that he's pretty happy with the success of his show, but he sometimes wishes he could move on to do more serious roles. Nick was in awe with the glamorous life his future self would someday lead, but then he started to wonder if he was married or had any kids. Future Nick assured him that he never married or had kids because "those things have needs" and he has no time for dealing with anyone other than himself. It was clear that Future Nick was very lonely, as his only friend was Andrew 3000, a robotic clone of Andrew Glouberman, who was substituting the real counterpart. Nick would start to dread the life he was destined to pursue and before things could get any worse, the regular Nick woke up from his high.

Future Nick did not appear in "Smooch or Share", however, his catchphrase was quoted by Past Nick. Nick would explain the rules of the game smooch or share and say that if the bottle landed on you, your options were to either smooch, share, or shake your booty, which he'd say in a suspiciously similar fashion his future self would. Andrew asked him to elaborate on that last one, but Nick brushed this off as it was not an actual rule. Later in the episode, Nick would go up to Missy, while she was pleasuring herself with Wiggles and once again, told her to shake her booty, referring to her humping gyration.

In Nick Starr, a ruinous future is depicted, where you need to pay for all basic human resources, including bathroom business. Future Nick gets ready for the day, and moves on to host one of his "Countdown to" game shows. In this one, two brothers are brought to the stage and persuaded to have sexual intercourse, in order to get money for their sick mother's cancer treatment. They don't end up having sex, and therefore the audience chooses to throw them into the "Spice Pit". The game show episode ends there, and Nick walks off into a different room. Then, the news comes up on Nick's holographic TVs, to which Matthew announces the death of Missy, whom has apparently died in a flying car accident. Missy had a plan called Project Earthseed, which was to terraform the moon in order to create a new home for humankind. Matthew also announces that her funeral will be held at Bridgeton Middle, her former middle school. Nick turns off the news and gets on his elevator, when his Hollywood agent calls. He announces that the Earth will be destroyed in 20 hours, and that there's a secret VIP ark going to the moon. He then sends A-3 two tickets to the ark, which were in the form of suppositories. However, the second one was only meant for another human Nick could reproduce with. Later on, Nick is looking for bachelorettes to bring to the moon, when the real Andrew calls. He asks Nick if he was coming to Missy's funeral, and says he can't. Andrew then announces Jessi will be coming. Because of this, Nick declares he's going to the funeral, realizing he may still have feelings for her. After he hangs up, he asks A-3 to show Jessi's life feed, revealing that she is currently a protestor. Nick decides that Jessi is the woman he's bringing on the Ark. Nick then descends into the world below the cloud line, to find it in complete ruins. After a horde of people surround Nick's car, he decides to fly back up above the cloud line, where a bunch of mosquitoes cause him to crash. Due to this accident, A-3 explodes, and someone in a hoodie kidnaps Nick. He wakes up in his old house, and the hooded stranger reveals himself to be Jay. He tells Nick he's turned his house into a "fucktopia", where his mom and dad still live. Then, Jay drives Nick and Lola to Missy's funeral. At the funeral, Nick meets all of his old schoolmates, and has a conversation with Andrew. Later on at the funeral, Nick and Jay notice Jessi entering and exiting the funeral. Nick follows Jessi into their old hallway, and they talk about their old experiences and the last time they saw each other, which was the argument they had in "A Very Special 9/11 Episode". Nick explains the world is ending, then asks Jessi if she could be the one he brings on the ark, to which she accepts. When they return to the funeral together, everyone sees a hologram of Missy appear and explain that she was assassinated because she knew too much. She explains that Project Earthseed was meant to save all of humanity, but the greedy upper class only wanted to save themselves. She then explains that the world will end today, and brings up the space ark which was leaving for the moon, even though that information was meant to be confidential. She orders everyone to get on the space ark. Nick nervously turns away and runs off, as everyone chases after him. Jessi and Nick get in Jay's car and quickly drive to the airport where the ark is located. In a heap of natural disasters and other obstacles, Nick and Jessi successfully make it to the airport and onto the ark. As the ark takes off, Jessi and Nick decide to have sex. The disasters then kill off everyone on Earth, including most of the main cast, following with an explosion that destroys the Earth completely. After Nick decides they should stop, Jessi puts on an explosive belt. She reveals that she was taking advantage of Nick's ego to get on the ark and make sure he dies. As Jessi activates the belt, Nick panics until Tito subtly informs him that there's an escape hatch on the ark, where he exits through an opening in the ship. As Jessi's explosion belt's timer runs out, the entire ark explodes, and Nick is now floating in an endless abyss of space. He realizes there is nobody else left but him, and he's all alone. That is, until he hears a faint voice tell him he isn't. This voice is revealed to be Tito. Tito tells Nick that he's actually on the bus riding back from the 9/11 museum, having an anxiety-induced nightmare. At this point, Nick Birch wakes up, no longer dreaming about his future self.

In "Horrority House", he disguises himself as a clown in Nick Birch's drug-induced hallucination, and chases him around in an abandoned bathroom. This pursuit of Nick Birch is meant to be one of the many game shows hosted by Nick Starr, called "Protect Yourself". Nick Birch eventually wins the game by standing up against Nick Starr, and, as a prize, gets stabbed by him. After stabbing him, Nick Starr possesses the body of Nick Birch, leaving him now a lost soul.

In "What Are You Gonna Do?" Nick Starr was now inside Nick Birch's body. When he got to school, he pays 2 dollars for Coach Steve to eat his own underpants. Meanwhile, the real Nick Birch is trying to warn his friends that the boy they see (Nick Starr) is not really him. Later on, he battles Nick Birch to get his body back, but Tito is preventing him from winning. Because of this, the Gratitoad helps Nick Birth defeat Nick Starr and Tito with gratitude. Nick Birch eventually defeats Tito, and gets his body back after comforting the Nick Birch buried deep inside Nick Starr's mind.

The post-credits scene for "Rice Purity Test", the audience sees a vision 27 years into the future (2049), where Nick Starr and Jay get on top of a water tower, take horse tranquilizers and jerk each other off so they could get lower scores on the Rice Purity Test.

## Appearance

Nick Starr is a much taller and older version of Nick Birch. His hair is somewhat longer and it's also significantly grayer, as it's lost its pigmentation with age. His skin has also started to fade and become a little more pale and flushed. He also now has wrinkles on his forehead, in between his eyes, and around the corners of his mouth. His eyes have also lost their glimmer. To counterbalance the faded colors of his actual body, Future Nick dons an eye-popping set of colorful clothing, complete with a vibrant electric cyan tuxedo, matching pants, a periwinkle undershirt, matching dress shoes, and a lilac tie.

## Personality

Nick Starr is a rich and successful celebrity, who seems to have it all. He appears to have gotten everything he's ever wanted out of life, from becoming famous to getting rich, to creating a cartoon about his life as a child. However, behind that happy smile of his, lies a very sad and dissatisfied soul. Nick's life is empty as he has no wife, no kids, and no friends other than a robot clone of his ex-best friend, Andrew.

## Episode Appearances

* Am I Gay?
* Drug Buddies
* Smooch or Share (Alluded)
* Nick Starr
* Four Stories About Hand Stuff (Mentioned)
* The Funeral (Mentioned)
* Horrority House
* What Are You Gonna Do? (Defeated)
* Rice Purity Test

## Trivia

* In many ways, Future Nick is based on Nick Kroll, as they're both famous celebrities who created cartoons about their childhoods, wherein the main characters served as obvious self-inserts. Nick Starr and Nick Kroll have also never married or had kids. It's possible that Kroll created Starr as a cry for help to project all of his insecurities and negative emotions onto, so he can show how bad his life is now.
* In "Am I Gay?", Future Andrew referred to Nick as his uncle, implying that in this version of their future, either Andrew married Leah or he just considers Nick to be an honorary family member.
* Future Nick's hair slightly resembles his father's hair.
* In "Smooch or Share", Nick Birch quotes his future self's catchphrase "Shake Your Booty" twice.