Drew

Drew Carey is a major supporting character in North Park. She is a student at North Park Elementary.

## Drew

### Relatives

Slappy (Uncle)
Crabby Little Fuck (Pet)
 Bongo Honker (2nd Uncle)
 Carrie Carey (Weird Lady On The Phone)
Nightmare Guy (sort of brother)

## Appearance

Drew has messy brown medium length hair. She is usually seen wearing purple swimwear, typically underneath her clothing, but occasionally also by itself, despite living in a cold mountain town. She sometimes includes a yellow duck pool float or other swimming accessories.

Being part clown, Drew must be ready to party at all times.

## Personality

Drew is a normal girl with a normal guardian, she's got everything going on for her! Drew is very easygoing, very fixated on her sitcoms and movies, sometimes breaks the fourth wall, she lives her life as it's a TV show and things will reset by the time the next episode airs, however this probably isn't the best way to do things, in her spare time she writes crossover fanfiction of her favorite sitcoms and holds tea parties with her body pillows, she currently has a collection of 10 body pillows. Drew fantasizes about what her life would be in her favorite shows and movies sometimes even going so far as to use tired tropes and framing devices that are all in her head. In short she is a pop culture junkie who probably owns all those video games based on sitcoms that are very real.

## Family

#### Slappy

Drew's parental guardian, Slappy has always been there for her in every way he can.

#### Nightmare Guy

Drew's weird little brother/cousin/slime creature. Drew doesn't really get him but she loves her weird giant little brother and tends to let him out of the basement on a regular basis when Teeny Steeve isn't able to.

#### Crabby Little Fuck

Drew's pet crab, one day she didn't have a crab the next day she did, like some weird time-space anomaly. Crabby seems to get into trouble, that Drew is either oblivious to or tries to ignore, he lives in a 1:1 scaled down Welcome Back, Kotter! Sweathogs Classroom Crab Habitat.

## Relationships

#### Slappy

Drew's uncle Slappy, the first face she sees in the day, well besides Rod Furley or Al Bundy, and the last person she talks to, besides her Gabe Kotter pillow case, Drew loves Uncle Slappy even if he is a little overbearing at times, she knows he means well but sometimes he's a little too protective which makes a kid wonder, what happened to make him so nervous about everything? Well except when he puts her in danger, then it's fine because it's a controlled danger.

#### Asimov

Drew's best friend, probably her only friend? Not that she minds, her and Asimov are always going on some crazy dangerous adventure or doing things they shouldn't like pulling pranks on unsuspecting kids or adults! Who can forget the time Drew tried to re-enact Back To The Future and nearly destroyed the clock tower because she thought Asimov's rocket launcher was a Flux Capacitor?

#### Beansy

Drew's "special friend" she trades her legos for favors. She absolutely has a crush on her, despite the mental barrier.

## Powers and abilities

### Knowledge Obsolete-a

Drew has the useless ability to quote, or reference, or even sing the intro from memory, to just about any sitcom between the year 1959 to 2005, yes that includes Bachelor Father, starring John Forsyth.

### Filmed in Front of A Live Studio Audience

When Drew says something "funny" a laugh track can be heard, however this could just be chalked up to her carrying a tape recorder with her.

### Down To Clown

Due to being half-clown Drew can live on sugar as if it's an actual nutrient, she can also handle lots of physically comedic things the average child could not.

## Trivia

Drew is at least a little bit gay, and insistently refuses to accept it, even though everyone else will.

## Gallery

Drew's supervillain costume.Drew reading a TV guide in the background.Drew's adult design.Drew's Fantasy game costume.Drew's horror game costume.It's a cannon.Original drawing censored for Fandom terms and service.Crabby little fuck.Original censored for Fandom terms of service.