Sburbsimyellowyard2 AudioLog

### Gigglesnort

(They are forces which if handled recklessly will nullify the basic ability of intelligent beings in all real and hypothetical planes of existence to give a shit. And that's why you need to use the Yard sparingly.)Conspirator’s Log number (SBURBSIMYELLOWYARD2)...Goddamnit. What did I say. WHAT did I FUCKING say. You can’t let all timelines exist, JR! Only ONE timeline can be the peak of narrative relevance! That’s called the ALPHA TIMELINE! GODDAMNIT! I can’t even BELIEVE how CATASTROPHIC this shit could be to the Omniverse itself! To reality! RESTRAINT, JR! RESTRAINT! THE YELLOW YARD IS A TOOL OF FREEDOM AND OF LIMITATION! YOU HAVE TO STAY LIMITED OR EVERYTHING BREAKS!GAH! What the fuck…Well… I am glad you’ve realized that limitations are required here. If Wasted power goes unchecked, everything very quickly becomes pointless.This is why consequences should be kept in mind.I believe in you, JR from… whatever time you are from.-Krysal Tepsyr, LOFAC, Session 1417

## Transcript

(JR) Okay, so, um... (Laughs) Mistakes were made but I fixed it, okay? Let's lead with that: I have fixed it. Um, so it turns out when you allow all timelines to be narratively relevant--that's the same thing as none of them being--wait, maybe I should back up. Um... Okay, I promise that is never going to happen again. I promise. I... (Sighs) I'm not going to try to defend myself--I'm not going to... I fucked up and I've taken steps--it's--it's physically not possible to happen again. Flat out; I've chained myself. Um, okay, let me--let me... (Sighs) No-one but me can access the Groundhog Day system right now. I am not allowed to use it without meta-observer permission. Not just permission but guidance. Hell, not just guidance but--the meta-observers flat out control it. I've taken my hands off the reins entirely because I obviously cannot be trusted. You know what? That probably still doesn't make sense. Operation Groundhog Day--AKA Operation Spiderdance, AKA--hey, maybe I was riding high on the Waste throes and I wasn't stopping to think of whether or not I should, I was just thinking of whether or not I could. Putting what I am now going to call Yellow Yards onto reality fucked shit up a lot. We can all agree that happened. But I've got the Yellow Yards chained to it now. What that means is that... (Sighs) I hope you're Wasted enough to understand this but only the amount of choices that can fit into the blah blah blah blah blah distance light can travel in three milliseconds--I didn't make the rules, that Waste of Space did. It makes sense if you're a Space player, I'm sure--but the amount of space light can travel in three milliseconds. Twist that until it's the amount of choices you can choose between and you understand what I'm talking about. It's not all possible choices. There's a limited amount of choices and the Time player isn't making them because obviously if the Time player did it they'd be in a stable time loop--it would just always happen the exact same way, that's what I was trying to get rid of--but it's not me making the choices either, okay? I did a lot of tests. I'm gonna stop complaining how hard it is to code in ~ath. I'm gonna test a lot harder. AB's helping me. The point is, unless the session is fucked I'm not even going to try to touch it, okay? I learned my lesson; restraint is still a thing even if I'm supposed to be done with my maturity quests. So, in summary: if a session is in the worst two percent of sessions AB will let me know. That's restraint one--I'm not picking when and where I get to do it. So AB tells me when to do it. I show up, I communicate with the Time player. That's step two. I obtain consent. Step three is I outline the amount of choices the Yellow Yard can contain. I don't bog things down explaining why it's those choices or why it's not others, I just do it. Step four: I let an observational meta-player pick. What that means is that only one of them is canon at once. The observational meta-player will go through them and, when they find one where they win, hopefully they're responsible enough to stop then. Testing shows they tend to be. Not many people attempt to make things worth--worse through that, even if they appear to be making decisions that are bad. I've seen a lot of sessions go where an observational meta-player horrorterror fuck decides to kill somebody and, hey, now that makes everybody live and--and--and they breed the frog. I'm really sorry. I'll find a way to make testing easier. I'll find a way... Hell, I'll--I'll find a way to make way more changes in the simulation before I put it on--on reality. I... I can't stop. If you're Wasted, you understand. You know--you know what it's like to not be able to stop. I've gotta fix this, but at least I can minimise the damage I'm doing while I--while I'm trying. Be safe and, seriously, don't try this at home.