Carebear Marines

***This article, Carebear Marines, is a non-canonical humour article written for entertainment purposes. It is not to be taken seriously, and does not need to follow any storyline in particular.***

**This article, Carebear Marines, was written by Mia Pallas. It may be linked to any page without asking for the author's permission.**

## Chaos Warband

### **Specialty**

Bring sparkling beauty to the Imperium. Destroy all that oppose beauty. Sometimes they are sent in to distract a target before another chaos warband attacks.

### **Allies**

Sorcerer Gargamel, Dr Nick and other Slaaneshi warbands

## Pre-Heresy

### **Colours**

Blue and white

The **Carebear Marines**, are a successor Chapter of the Ultrasmurfs that has gone traitor. Their love of beauty and bright colours has been so important in their missions that they complete forgot the reason they would fight. Seeing something ugly is an affront to them so they give the ugly this person, place or thing an ultimatum. Sparkle or die! If they chose not to be beautified by the chaos warband, they are attacked by the Sparkleblaster by beams of light (the equivalent of lasers) and deadly sparkling confetti. If they choose to comply, they receive a t-shirt from a t-shirt canon and a different less deadly light beam will pass over the item or thing and beautify it.

## Warband History

Previously members of the Ultrasmurfs, the Carebear marines came into existence by a combination of factors. Firstly, during a particularly brutal battle, some of the members of the Ultrasmurfs felt disgust, not only at having xenos blood spilled but also at the gruesomeness and messiness of the purging. Soon after their disgust grew and they began to hope for less messy and better ways of dispatching xenos. Soon after this event, Gargamel, the evil sorcerer captured a squad of Ultrasmurfs and dowsed them with a potent potion made of sparkles and teddy bear stuffing. Soon the ones touched by the potion, turned gentler and they had more hope for the future. Gargamel though he had failed at turning them to chaos and that they were harmless so he let them go. These Ultrasmurfs, painted their power armour pink and reintegrated their home. Soon, they found the mushrooms ugly and decided that they must beautify their home. The other Ultrasmurfs opposed the thought and the Carebear smurfs got angry for the other Marine's reticence to beautify. A war ensued and thus, the Carebear Marines were created and turned to Slaanesh for help beautifying the Imperium.

## Warband Homeworld

The Carebears were originally from Smurfopolis and were Ultrasmurfs before the evil sorcerer Gargamel turned them into the Carebear Marines by dousing them in a potent potion. The Carebear marines returned to their home planet of Smurfopolis but the could not find the prettiness in it and the Ultrasmurfs did not want to be beautified. After a campaign to try to take Smurfopolis for themselves failed, they traveled through the warp and set their goals on a gorgeous colourful planet that had cotton candy trees and marshmallow clouds. This was perfect for them so they settled there and called the planet Cloud Nine. Other creatures inhabit this world, they are gummy bear people. The temperature is always the same and never varies much. Mostly between 20 and 25 degrees.

## Notable Campaigns

* **Becoming the Carebear Marines** - During a routine morning training session, a small group of Ultrasmurfs were captured by the chaos sorcerer Gargamel. His intent was to create a tracking potion to find his way to the ever elusive city of Smurfopolis, where the Ultrasmurfs' fortress monastery was. He created a potion and smeared it on the Ultrasmurfs he had captured. Dropping them in the middle of the forest, he opened the trap and out they went. They started changing slowly.

First, they felt disgust at blood shed, then they started disliking the aesthetics of Smurfoplis. Eventually, they became obsessed with pretty things and making everything pretty. They tried to convince the other Ultrasmurfs to join them. This resulted in fighting and the newly named carebear Marines were outcasted. They then set off on a journey to find the Sorcerer Gargamel, in hopes of getting some of the potion that had made them superior to the Ultrasmurfs. It was not a very difficult task as he had been blundering about the woods trying to follow his captives. His potion had failed in making a tracking device but instead, it created a new ally for Gargamel. He agreed to share his potion in return for information regarding Smurfopolis. The Carebear Marines agreed and an alliance was formed.

* **The battle of Smurfopolis**- Slowly, the Carebear Marines started searching for ways to make their city prettier and also hoped to convert some Ultrasmurfs into choosing to be pretty. This task was daunting because most simply did not care enough to want to look better so the small band of Brothers set to work spreading colour and sparkles on the city. It still wasn't enough. The people were annoyed because "the sparkles were everywhere and impossible to wash off."

This angered the Carebear Marines and put the Ultrasmurfs and Carebear Marines at odds. It was time to make a move. The evil sorcerer Gargamel was coming to take Smurfopolis. Let him have the ungrateful, ugly city. The Carebear Marines lead Gargamel straight into the City Center hoping he would be able to successfully turn all the Ultrasmurfs into Carebear Marine. The Ultrasmurfs came to fight the chaos Sorcerer but soon realized that their opponent was supported by the Carebear Marines and likely the cause of the change in the poor Carebear Marines in front of them. The battle was fierce, the Ultrasmurfs managed to push back the sorcerer. When the Carebear Marines realized they would not be win this battle, they retreated, but not before they took the Ultrasmurfs' most prized mushroom, stole a vessel and left the Ultrasmurfs to fend for themselves. They would find a new, prettier home on Cloud Nine.

* **The Carebear Marines say Pretty Please**- Now that the Carebear Marines were essentially homeless, they set to work to beautify their new ship **Scare-a-lot**. They needed weapons and also some sort of devices to help make worlds that would join in their ideals, beautiful. Tenderheart thought for a moment. He prayed to the Emperor to give them a sign that he would help. Well, the answer was clearly no because they came upon a very nasty forge world that did not take very well to the Carebears ideals. They had the traditional Ultrasmurf weapons on them but their numbers were not great so once again, after inflicting minimal damage, they retreated but not before an opposing Marine called the leader a xenos and a heretic. Once abroad the Scare-a-lot, Tenderheart confined himself to his quarters, deep in thought. Perhaps that Marine was right. He had not asked the right deity for help. In that moment, he reflected on his options. Slaanesh seemed to be the one god that may be willing to help so he prayed, as he had done earlier but this time to the god Slaanesh. As he prayed, he heard laughter erupt from nowhere in his chambers. Sparkles danced in the air and fused together until a pegasus/unicorn took shape. Slaanesh had agreed to support their cause and he had created for them, the first sparkleponey, who would soon give birth to many other sparkleponeys and jousting Polar Bears and all kinds of beautiful deadly living weapons.

* **Return to the Forge world**- After a mass celebration of the new gift from Slaanesh, the Carebear Marines decided to return to the Forge world where they had been pushed back with the intent to show them their new allegiance and take over the planet. As they arrived, they immediately came down upon the world with their new jousting polar bears and their Sparkleponeys. They Had new found power and beauty to share on the world. Quickly, they transformed the ugly world with rainbow lasers and sparkle blasters. The battle was long and hard. Some of the inhabitants of the planet chose to join the Carebear marines and let themselves be beautified but most of the Imperial forces fell to the Carebear Marines Forces. From orbit, the Scare-a-lot used it's rainbow lasers to destroy resistance. When all was said and done, the Carebear Marines had taken this forge world and made it gorgeous and it was now their home. The smoke rose from the battle and the manufacturing plants began manufacturing sparkle weapons in mass including Bamboozlers. The smoke produced from these factories smelled of cotton candy. From above, it looked like the, then ugly planet, had been taken over by clouds of marshmallows. The Carebears loved their new home and called it Cloud Nine.

## Warband Organisation

### Hierarchy

* **Commander**-Leader of the Carebear Marine, he is recognized by the heart on his chest armour. He leads the other Marines in Battle and decided when to use their ultra powerful chest lasers do bring destruction to the enemy.

* **Design Officer**-This Carebear Marine is the second in command. If the Leader, Tenderheart, dies, this Marine will inherit the rank of Commander and his chest Symbol will change from a rainbow to a heart and he will be known as Tenderheart. The Design officer comes up with the plans. He chooses who to approach, after he has chosen the perfect colour scheme and accent colours for the world and the people living on it.

* **Pretty Officer**- There are a few Pretty Officers. They are charged with riding the sparkleponeys into negotiations and either making the necessary changes to bring prettyness to the conquered planet of to start a war and destroy the people of that world. These Marines sport a colour pallet on their armour.

* **Rainbow Enforcer**-These Marines ride on the jousting polar bears and join the attack once the Pretty officers have returned with an answer. These Marines sport a dark cloud on the chest armour.

* **Sparkle Support**- Rainbow support is aerial and orbital support officers who destroy the planet using their lasguns of multiple colours making death swift and pretty. These Marines sport a sunshine on their chest armour.

* **Bamboozler**- The Bamboozlers have a balloon symbol on their chest armour. The have Bamboozles that shoot out multiple colour balloons which trap the enemy in beautifully colourful balloons. Individual resistance will result in capture in these balloons.

## Combat Doctrine

The Carebear Marines will always send negotiators to find out if an ugly city, planet or race is interested in being prettified. These negotiators as called Design Officers. The people of the world are given the option to Sparkle or die. If they choose death, then the carebears ride into the city on their jousting polar bears, sparkleponeys and on foot to destroy, in a beautiful burst of colour and destruction. These carebear marines are called Sparkle and Rainbow Support. If a planet is deemed unsaveable, then they will shoot colourful lasers from their vessel named Scare-a-Lot. If people choose to sparkle, then the Pretty Officers are called in to help implement the Design Officer's plans.

Bamboozlers are always present waiting to capture anyone who tries to escape the prettifying of the Carebear Marines. If a group of people make a choice that goes against the general population and decided to rebel against the Carebear Marines, the Carebears will lock arms in anger and their symbol on they chest plate will glow and a mighty rainbow laser will immediately eviscerate the rebels.

## Warband Beliefs

The Carebear Marines are not aligned with anyone in particular. They believe that the Imperium should be beautiful and they have the means to do it. They would accept allies from any faction, as longs as they had similar values and could work together to make the world a prettier place. When they arrive at a World, they always offer to make it pretty before they take action. If the world is inclined to be beautified, they arrive with they tools and will paint rainbows everywhere and they even have designers to make sure the colours do not clash. Anyone who refuses to be pretty is met with hostility. Whether they be chaos, xenos or Imperium, there is no difference to the Carebear Marines. If a Marine is inclined to join their ranks, there is a beauty test in which they must find the ugliest thing they can and transform it into a beautiful, sparkling work of art. Instead of receiving geneseed, the person or xenos, receives three drops of Gargamel's potion and they are altered to become a carebear Marine.

Everything must be pretty to look at, ugly things, need to be destroyed.

## Notable Personnel

* **Tenderheart**- Tenderheart has lead the Carebear Marines to many victories and partial Victories in battle but his most significant contribution was to pray to Slaanesh for assistance to make the Imperium pretty. He is considered blessed by the chaos god, although no mark of the god appears on his body or armour.

* **Cheer bear**-Cheer Bear had come up with the plans to take over the Forge World and create the beautiful homeworld of the Carebear Marines, Cloud Nine. His designs were exquisite. After the world was transformed, he set to work on the ship, making it look like a flying cloud in space.

* **Grumpy Bear**- Grumpy Bear is acclaimed for his exploit in manipulating Dr. Nick Riveara into creating the Carebear Cousins. Becsuse he spoke out about giving an ultimatum to the cartoonish Doctor, instead of killing him for his sins of ugliness, his name will always be remembered.

## Warband Appearance

The Carebear Marines have bright pink power armour with rainbow shoulder and knee pads and a symbol on the chest plate. Usually something pretty like a heart, rainbow, glitter, clouds or the sun. Everything about them is pretty and screams fun.

The Bamboozle squad all have balloons as the symbol on their breast plate because they specialize in trapping opponents in balloons.

### Warband Colours

Every Carebear Marine wears pink armour and sports rainbows on it. The only change is the symbol on the breast plate.

### Warband Badge

The badge is the symbol of their intention and associated with their name, although the main one would be rainbows.

## Warband Fleet

* **Scare-a-lot**- This is the main ship of the Carebear Marines. It is shaped like a cloud and has many weapons attached to it that shoots out colourful laser beams and small sparkly confetti that is essentially shrapnel. The ship is the home base of the care bear marines and it is a thing of beauty.

* **Sparkleponeys**- Sparkleponeys are unicorns/pegasus that have been weaponized. They usually have a Sparkleblaster on their flank that shoots out sharp confetti that will destroy a target while also making it beautiful. They also have canons that throw out t-shirts for those who are converted to their aesthetic ways.

* **Jousting polar bears**- The Jousting polar bears is the equivalent of the cavalry. The Carebear Marines ride in on the Bears when they attack. Their long spears do double duty. The end of the spear is pointed and seems like the traditional weapon but it also shoots laser beams at the enemy. The Jousting polar bears can sometimes float in on small clouds when necessary.

## Warband Relics

* **Sparkellos**- The first Sparkleponey, gifted to the Carebear Marines from Slaanesh. This is the parent to all other Sparkleponeys and is ridden by Tenderheart. When flying it trails rainbow lights and sparkly shrapnel.

* **Gargamel's potion recipe**- A sacred book for the Carebear Marines which shows the exact ingredients and amounts to create more Carebear Marines. It's pages are also filled with before and after pictures of all members who have accepted the transformation.

## Relations

### Allies

* **Slaaneshi Warband**- The Carebear Marines get along very well with most Slaaneshi Warbands because they can find pleasure in many things. They have thought the Marines the beauty of their own world that can be found by experimenting with certain potions and medications. They usually do not antagonize other Slaaneshi warbands.

* **Gargamel**- A chaos sorcerer who had created them in the first place and liberated them from their former misery as Ultrasmurf Marines who had nothing to do other than kill beautiful and ugly people alike because they did not like the concept of the Emperor, a rotten piece of flesh and bone disgustingly staining a perfectly good throne on a once beautiful planet called Terra. The Carebear Marines are thankful that they were liberated by the Sorcerer Gargamel and come to his aid when needed.

* **Dr. Nick Riveara**- The Carebear Marines had gone to Sprungfield to give their Ultimatum, Sparkle or die. An ugly Healer gave the Carebear Marines a new family. The Carebear Cousins. Because of this action, they chose to suffer his ugliness in case they needed his help to achieve more pretty friends again.

### Enemies

* **Ultrasmurfs**- The Carebear Marines, being the Ultrasmurfs successor, are quite angry at the Ultrasmurfs for refusing their offer to make them beautiful. The Carebears no longer offer to prettify them but simply try to erase their ugliness form existence at every encounter and often retreat with some sort of a symbolic victory.

* **Adeptus Mechanicus**- The Carebear Marines offer time and time again to beautify the most ugly Carebear enemy. The Adeptus Mechanicus. Insulting them beyond belief and always attacking them with their chest lasers and sparkle weapons, they are natural enemies.

* **Poxwalker and any diseased Nurgle aligned faction**- disgusted by the virulent, awful looking pus filled Nurgle aligned groups, again, the Carebear Marines do not offer to beautify the underlings of Nurgle and like to use scented sprays and sparkle weapons to get them out of their sight. They are horrifying to look at for the Carebear Marines and they simply cannot suffer their existence.

## By The Carebear Marines

"*I just want the Imperium to be pretty and we cannot accomplish that with the Emperor so we asked Slaanesh and he said sure and gave us rainbows, sparkles and a Sparkleponey.*"
—Tenderheart, Leader of the CareBear Marines
### About

"*I KNEW THE SMURFS WERE HERITICS! I TOLD YOU! NOW LOOK, IT'S PINK! BY THE EMPEROR MY SHIP-*"
—Inquisitor Kalron Chor proven right