Logan Paul

Logan Paul ( 大きなペニス Loganu-San) is a minor deity within the Strawinsky cannon. As one of the enemies of the kilted troll, he can often be found in major plot arcs. His main trait is his necrophelia, which allows him to reanimate the dead by busting a fat nut. he first appeared in season 1, episode 69, when he was resurrected by peter griffin to save brian. Following this, he met the kilted troll, who instantly obliterated him with his vast pp, leading to their ultimate rivalry.

## Logan Paul

### Aliases

Decius Nuticus, Loganu-san, Ubermensch, Furher Cringe

### Affiliation

Scott Cawthon, Globgogabgalab (briefly), Adolf Hitler, Caesar's Legion, Freddy Fazbear's Pizzeria

## Physical description

### Birth

As previously noted, Logan paul was born in 50 B.C., and is thought to be the cause of the fall of the Greek empire. Unfortunately, as he was flooding their rivers with copious amounts of his sweet, sweet nut, he got lead poisoning and sadly perished at the age of 3.

### Resurrection

On December 12, 1769, peter griffin resurrected him while on a trip to the past to kill strawinski’s father. When Brian was hit by a car, Peter resurrected Logan using the souls of the damned he collected in episode 3. Immediately, Logan flooded the state of Maine with his delicious semen, single-handedly causing the American revolution. That same day, the kilted troll arrived and murdered Peter with a baseball bat to protect the timeline. Logan Paul, devastated over the loss of his father figure, attempted to kill the kilted troll. With his massive wiener, the troll crushed Logan Paul into the ground, where she stayed until 1931 when Nazi scientists uncovered him.

### WWII

during World War II, Logan was kept very secret by the Nazi scientists, who provided them with his mystical healing semen in order to finally create the übermensch. Hitler then realized that Logan was the Übermensch, and would have won World War II, if the kilted troll hadn’t returned to murder him at the battle of Stalingrad. Quasi-immortal, Logan Paul became frozen in the ice until 2069, when global warming would unleash him.

### 2069 and The Globgogabgalab

Awakening in 2069 at the end of the 5th world war, he was taken in by the resurrected William Clinton, and brainwashed into becoming a vegan. He was then castrated, which unfortunately removed all of his power. Looking for salvation, he encountered the Globgogabglab, as well as the masturbation cello, who were leading the resistance against the tyrannical Scott Cawthon and future Logan Paul. Using the power of cringe, they had enslaved humanity, and Logan knew what he had to do. Killing himself by stabbing himself with his throbbing pp, Logan paul died and thus, altered the timeline making the future a paradise.

#### First Incursion Into Hell

Awakening at the foot of the devil, Paul found himself in hell. There, with the help of Freddy Fazbear and Good Guy Foxy (both sentenced to eternal suffering for their cringe) he defeated the devil, actually the kilted troll in disguised, stole his pp and sewed it onto himself. More powerful than ever, he returned to 2014 with his new time traveling powers. Fortunately, one of the many avatars of the globgogabgalab was there to kill him again.

#### Second incursion into hell

After (barely) losing a massive pp sword fight that caused tsunamis and earthquakes, the globgogabgalab sent him back to hell. there, in season 7, episode 69, he learned of vine and began making cringe videos, which the kilted troll uses to embarras him. He occasionally, to this day, (as of season 678, episode 12,) manifests on the material plane, and he runs a cult dedicated to his sacred number, 69.

## Trivia

* There is a miscontinuity in season 9, episode 3, where it is stated that he was ressurected in ‘32, not ‘31
* 69 is his holy number
* Though often thought to be a god, he is actually only a demigod, which explains how he is often beaten in combat
* He likes Jojo’s Bizzare adventure but hates Dragon Ball z