Your Mom

Things start out friendly with Mallory & Stacey until Mallory slips up on her words! But maybe those are Mal's true feelings coming out?

## Transcript

Mallory: Hey, Joe, are you okay?
Jeremy: ...Yeah, I'm good.
Stacey: He and Gina broke up.
Mallory: Oh, I thought that was weeks ago.
Jeremy: It was, it's just... Today I saw here and the new guy she's dating is just the worst.
Mallory: Ugh, that stinks.
Stacey: It's seriously awful seeing exes move on, dude.
Jeremy: Oh no, it's like way more than that. He's like literally the ugliest person on the planet.
Mallory: Ugh.
Stacey: No, seriously, he's pretty ugly.
Mallory: Oh, speaking of which, Greg, how's your mom doing?

Stacey: Child, what did you say?
Mallory: I was just asking how your mom is..? I heard she had food poisoning.
Stacey: Oh, no, no, no, no, no. Joe said Gina is dating seriously the ugliest guy on the planet, and you said "Speaking of which, how is your mom doing?"
Mallory: Did I?
Stacey: Oh yeah, boo, you did. And I don't know why you think my amazing mother that raised me all by herself is ugly.
Mallory: I don't! I didn't say that, Greg!
Stacey: Okay, okay... well, well, speaking of moms, where did you get those jeans from? Looks like the Tall Butt Pants Barn!
Mallory: Hey! Kylie Jenner wears these, okay? I will have you know. And it was just an accidental segue, okay? It was an accident. I didn't mean it.
Stacey: I'm... I'm sorry, I just... You know how I am with my mom. My bad. Sorry guys, my bad.
Mallory: I'm sorry, too.

Jeremy: Man, Greg, you've got a temper. You went full-on ogre there for a second.
Mallory: Yeah, Greg. How is your mom?
Stacey: What?! How dare you?
Mallory: I was just asking!
Stacey: No, no, no. Homeboy referenced an orc and you roll up in here talking about my mom again!
Mallory: It was technically an ogre.
Stacey: You know good and well they are the same ugly.
Mallory: I disagree.
Jeremy: I... This cereal is really good.
Mallory: Listen, okay? I... I really didn't mean anything by it, Greg.
Stacey: You know what, I do not care what you say, because subconsciously, you think my mom is Shrek.
Mallory: No! Okay, no. Speaking of beautiful women, how is your mom? Speaking of Beyoncé, how is your mom?
Stacey: I'll allow it.
Mallory: Okay...

Jeremy: Alright, let's change the subject, okay? You guys see the news this morning? The country really is an unstable mess.
Stacey: Now I got you! Becau- oh. So I thought you were going to segue from that to my mom again.
Mallory: A ha! So you think your mom is a mess too!
Stacey: No! Did you just say "too"?
Mallory: No!
Stacey: What... why do you hate my mom so much?!
Mallory: I don't! I'm just bad at words! Seriously!
Stacey: Well, speaking of serious, Brittany, how is your IBS?
Mallory: Oh, it's actually really good, but... Hey, you're being mean!
Stacey: "You're being mean!"
Mallory: Oh, speaking of obnoxious noises, how is your singing voice doing?
Stacey: You told me I didn't make it into the community musical because I was black!
Mallory: It was "The Wiz", Greg!
Stacey: Well, well, speaking of "The Wiz", you're going to need a wizard to fix those front-bottom jeans!
Mallory: Ugh! Speaking of jeans, too bad your genetics gave you your mom's behind!
Stacey: You better watch yourself!
Mallory: Oh, you know what your mom's behind reminds me of? Your mom's front hind! Her face!
Stacey: No one talks about my mom's front hind!
Mallory: It's a hind up there!
Stacey: You know good and well!

Jeremy: Guys! Guys! Speaking of your mom, can I get her number?
Stacey: Why?
Mallory: Huh?
Jeremy: I just think she's a pretty cool lady.

Stacey: ...Finally someone appreciates how beautiful my mom is. Thank you. Thank you so much!