King's Faith (GAM066)

## Hosts

Noah Lugeons

Heath Enwright

Eli Bosnick

***King's Faith*** is the story of a troubled teenager named "Brendan King" who does several things throughout the movie , none of which matter at all because God controls everything and actions don't matter, and none of the plot connects to anything else.

### **Opening Phrase**

Where each week we sample another selection from Christian cinema, because we want to experience the same kind of disappointment as our lovers.

### **How Bad Was It?**

Well, if you love those feel-good movies where a white family takes in a black kid, but you're tired of being told how crazily terribly racist those are, but you still want to be terribly crazily racist, you will *love* this movie. Fifty-percent *Blind Side*, fifty-percent *Loving the Bad Man*—it's *Loving the White Man*.

### **Best Worst**

* Heath: ...nothing. This movie is aggressively mediocre. [Play a video game while watching.]
* Eli: ...sudden terrible message in a movie. [A short, hard right turn.]
* Noah: …best-worst unrelated unresolved side-plots [Why did we take *that* tangent?]

### **Notes**

* This episode was briefly released on *Patreon* as episode sixty-seven, prompting comparisons to Tom of *Cognitive Dissonance*. Also, the standard episode moved the first interstitial to in front of the second interstitial, and just has the Blue Apron ad instead.
* The film has *Live It Out: The King's Faith Bible Study*, as well as a discussion guide, and a very extensive Facebook page.

### **Jokes**

* [Heath: Well, it's not as bad as you guys are saying. You're *purchasing* the person, it's not—] [Noah: Yeah.] [Heath: It's… You were making out—] [Noah: Well no, but no… it, it, it But at the end, if they volunteer to let you drive an awl through their ear on the doorjamb, I think you get to keep 'em, so it's moral.] [Eli: I don't know what that's a reference to, but I *am into it*.] **-Patreon Intro**
* [Eli: Take that, Komodo dragon.] [Noah: Moms like, "Yo, maybe the only answer is that there is no answer." To which dad says, "Look we can turn away from this kid or we can turn to him." And I'm like, "Are we back on that conversation now? Did the pages stick together in the script? What the fuck just happened?] [Eli: You have a feeling that during this movie a lot of people yelled "Keep rolling!"] [laughter] **-Standard Intro**

### **Interstitials**

* "This Ain't No Dream, Yo." (5:41)
* Brandon and the Cop (1:09:42)

### **Tropes**

* Alcohol= Bad Guy
* Black Person is a Drug Dealer/Criminal
* Disappointing Christian Celebrity [Kayla Compton went on to be Allegra Garcia on *The Flash* from 2019–2023]
* Go Fuck Yourself
* Looks Like…
* Name That Movie!
* Nothing Happens
* RACISM!

### **Breakfast Club Close**

* Heath: Brendan started dressing up like the Stubbs' dead son Louis, and it wasn't weird—mom loved it.
* Noah: Natalie went on to do porn, hopefully.
* Eli: Eli spent all the *Patreon* and ad money on a date with Zack. Zack was never the same again.

### **Links**

* Episode on Audioboom
* Episode on YouTube
* Episode on Patreon
* Film on YouTube
* IMDb

### **Ad Reads**

* Blue Apron: Ray Comfort for Thanksgiving (5:43) [Standard Episode]