TRP: Goro, Hansel, and Mishka (Break)

**Coyote:** at 4:29
PM

[Setting: Inside Hansel's bedroom. Day 150, sometime in the
afternoon or night. After Hansel is taken upstairs to his bedroom after getting
knocked unconscious after getting possessed.]

The last person watching Hansel finished, heading back
downstairs. Mishka-- who was sitting idly in the library-- caught a glimpse of
them leaving. He stood automatically, heading towards Hansel's room.

Then stopped.

Goro was heading towards Hansel's room, too.

He looked fucking exhausted. Dead on his feet. Crusted blood
still on the side of his face. He had a shifty, hunted look in his eyes, like a
cornered animal; it was the look he always got when he was badly injured. I'm
fine, Goro had said to Lucienne down in the dungeon. Yeah fucking right.

**Lina:** at 4:35 PM

Goro spotted Mishka headed the same place he was, and he
stopped.

Yeah, alright, Mishka's turn. Goro should probably sleep,
anyway. He'd been trying, but he kept jerking awake every time he started to
doze off. Oh fucking well.

He turned and started for his own room.

**Coyote:** at 4:36
PM

Mishka snatched him by the back of shirt. "Hey, hey,
hey. You. You're with me." He started steering Goro towards Hansel's room
without asking.

**Lina:** at 4:37 PM

"Why," he said. Reached back carefully to tug his
shirt free of Mishka's hand. He'd changed out of the charred clothes, but even
these ones still chafed painfully against the burns.

**Coyote:** at 4:40
PM

"Why? Why d'you need to know why? Because I said
so." Mm, maybe that wouldn't work here. Mishka sometimes forgot other
people need to be told things. "Because--"

Ah, hm, Mishka actually didn't have a coherent reason for
this.

**Lina:** at 4:41 PM

Goro didn't care enough to argue, anyway. He let Mishka lead
him into Hansel's room. "He still asleep?"

**Coyote:** at 4:43
PM

Oh. That was easy. Mishka was going to tell him because
Hansel will want to see you when he wakes up, but Goro had given in faster than
expected. Excellent.

Mishka didn't shut the door. He checked Hansel over through
the door to the bedroom. "Looks like it. Resting more peacefully now, at
least." And then he left again, wordlessly, heading out the door.

He didn't shut it behind him then, either.

**Lina:** at 4:52 PM

Goro stared after Mishka, puzzled. Fine, apparently it was
his watch. He walked to the doorway to Hansel's bedroom. He stood halfway in
and halfway out, hugging the doorjamb. "Watch" probably wasn't meant
literally, but... he didn't know what fucking else to do.

**Coyote:** at 4:53
PM

Mishka came back in a few minutes with a large bowl of hot
water and a basket of clean rags. He set them down on the side table. He
grabbed Goro by the arm and steered him over to the couch. "Siddown."

**Lina:** at 4:54 PM

"Ow," he snapped before he could stop himself. He
pried Mishka's fingers off his arm, but conceded to sitting on the couch.

**Coyote:** at 4:59
PM

"Oh? Ow, y'say? That's funny, I thought you were
fine," Mishka muttered. Fuckin' Goro. "Getting your goddamn self
hurt." He grabbed a rag. Wet it in the hot water, then went to start
wiping the blood off. Gently, delicately, going slowly around the bruises.

"Sugar says you ran off to go check on Hansel
first," he said, quietly, after a moment. "And y'got your fucking ass
handed to you. Said that when she arrived, you were already bleeding out on the
ground."

**Lina:** at 5:01 PM

"Yup. Thanks for the reminder." He tried not to
wince when Mishka rubbed at the tender spots. Hard to fake it when he was so
damn tired, though.

**Coyote:** at 5:03
PM

Mishka finished wiping away the crusted blood. He grabbed a
bottle of something else, unscrewed it. He wet a fresh rag with alcohol, then
murmured, "Hold still. D'you mind if I...?"

He reached for the nasty-looking cut on Goro's arm. Where a
bolt has singed past, slicing open his skin, somehow.

**Lina:** at 5:06 PM

Goro breathed out through his teeth, hissing. "If
you're worried about it festering, don't. I'll heal it tomorrow after I
rest."

**Coyote:** at 5:13
PM

Mishka forced his fingers to stop. He gritted his teeth.
What was the point of waiting? They were already here. Goro was in pain. He was
bleeding on Hansel's couch.

Goro was sitting on the couch, and Mishka was bent over him.
Mishka stopped what he was doing, but he didn't move away, and he looked at
Goro without speaking. Their faces were only a few inches apart.

"I'm going to clean it and bandage it," Mishka
said. It was a fact this time, not a question. His voice was quiet.
"You're going to hold still and let me help you. It's going to hurt a bit,
but it'll be fine."

He moved to dab the injury with alcohol.

**Lina:** at 5:18 PM

Goro held his arm out and turned his face away, biting down
on his own finger in preparation. Really, it wasn't as bad as he expected. The
damn thing already hurt so much as it was, the sting of the alcohol was more
like a shift than an addition. "I'm telling you, this isn't fucking
necessary," he said, spitting out his finger.

**Coyote:** at 5:31
PM

"Mm. Well, tactically speaking, we could be attacked by
bandits tonight," Mishka said. "Or one of our many enemies will come
to kill us for whatever reason. Or Tricksy could appear out of nowhere and kill
us all. Or a monster could attack. Or..." Eyes flickered to Hansel.
"Or Hansel could get possessed again, and we could have take him down
again."

He finished cleaning the injury. Set aside the bloody cloth.

"I want you fixed up however we can," Mishka said.
Also, I'm fucking concerned about you.

Ah, fuck it. Mishka grimaced. He applied a salve to keep the
wound clean, then began winding a bandage. "Just... fucking let me help
you," he muttered. "Hansel's going to be-- look, Hansel fucking loves
you, alright? He's going to be upset if he wakes up possessed and murders you.
I want you healed. I just want-- fuck's sake. Look, it's not fun, watching you
sit here in pain."

**Lina:** at 5:34 PM

"Fine. But you don't need to do this, I can do it
myself. I'm a medic." That said, he made no move to stop Mishka. Was more
interested to see what Mishka would do in response.

**Coyote:** at 5:36
PM

Mishka paused. He lifted his head to watch Goro. "Am I
doing something incorrectly?"

**Lina:** at 5:39 PM

"It's fine." Goro tipped his head back to rest on
the couch, and covered his eyes with his free hand. "All I'm fucking good
for, and everyone else can do it just fine."

**Coyote:** at 5:41
PM

"Oh, for fuck's sake," Mishka muttered.
"D'you want me to flatter you? I can." He went back to tying the
bandage, then started on the next wound.

**Lina:** at 5:43 PM

"No. God no. Shut up, Mishka. I didn't do shit in that
fight. My magic didn't do anything." He didn't necessarily want Mishka to
know how much that disturbed him, but he could hear the panicky sound creeping
into his voice, regardless.

**Coyote:** at 5:52
PM

"Hey. Hey." Mishka stopped and took Goro's face in
his hands.

"You did fine," Mishka said. "You're the one
who thought to check on him. You bolted right there. You did what you could.
Y'magic didn't work in one fucking fight, Goro. So what? And besides that,
you're--"

Fuck's sake. "You're the one who talked me into this
goddamn alliance," Mishka said. "You and Hansel. When... when fucking
Diva got me, you came right for me, and fucking-- used that fucking fucked-up
wand on me. You're the one who talked Rina into considering me for the
Spymaster position. Did I tell you that? She nominated me for the position, but
we haven't got the votes-- fuck, that's not important. Look. You're useful for
a lot of fucking things, Goro. Shit nobody else does. The fact that one time
your magic didn't work is not a moral fucking failing."

He yanked the bandage on the last injury a little tight. He
wanted-- if he could just explain--

"And the snark," Mishka said. "And the
bullshit. I like that too. You're good for a lot of things. So shut the fuck up
and let me goddamn fix you."

He just--

He just. God damn it.

He kissed Goro.

**Lina:** at 5:58 PM

Goro was too fucking shocked to move. He felt cold, and he
went completely still.

Were they--doing this again, then? But he'd planned to keep
his distance from Mishka, and...

He pushed his head forward, deepening the kiss.

**Coyote:** at 6:08
PM

Oh fuck. Mishka grasped blindly for the back of the couch.
He found it and steadied himself. He flattened his other hand on Goro's chest,
hold himself up and keeping Goro down at the same time.

The kiss deepened, and Mishka made a small, frustrated
noise, shifting to move closer to him. Setting one knee on the couch. Fuck,
he'd told himself he wasn't doing this. He'd told himself Goro was avoiding
him.

I'd like to know if I want to kill you or not, Goro had
said.

He needed to stop. It made no sense from any rational angle.
But he was sick of talking himself out of it.

**Izzy:** at 6:15 PM

Hansel woke feeling ... better. Still like shit, but
slightly less like it. Someone had healed him, and moved him to his bed. Fuck,
he wondered how they'd pulled that off. Roddy, maybe. Kid wasn't the strongest
but he had more going for him than any of the others, in that regard. God, he
was still fuckin' sore, though, every goddamn part of him, like he'd fallen off
a cliff and hit every rock along the way.

Better, though. Better. He pushed himself up, immediately
feeling lightheaded and having to stop for a moment, catch his breath. Both
felt ravenous and like he might throw up.

So fucking hungry.

He shook it off. They hadn't tied him down or anything --
must be pretty fuckin' sure it wasn't going to happen again soon. He wasn't that
sure, and there weren't any windows in his quarters -- he'd picked the room out
because of that, so it'd be more secure, but it meant he couldn't see the sky.
Needed to see the sky. Needed to be sure.

The bed was silent under him, and he managed to not just
fall onto his feet. Or fall afterwards, though it felt like a close thing for a
moment there. He supported himself along the wall, over to the open door. They
could've at least locked him in. Probably should've just left him in the cell.

He shambled around the corner, intending to grab his silver
trident so that he could use it for stability, get across the hall to the room
no one had claimed -- the big airy one with the balcony. He'd be able to see
from there.

Except that when he rounded the corner, he saw Mishka
half-pinning Goro down on his couch, grabbing his chest, kissing him hard. Oh.
Ah. He forgot everything about checking the sky. He started to make a crack
about how they hadn't even waited for his body to get cold, but he had the
presence of mind to realize that might be ... an upsetting thing to say.

"Oh," he said instead, leaning against the wall
for a moment. Grinned at them weakly. "Great."

**Lina:** at 6:24 PM

When Mishka pressed his hand against Goro's chest, Goro's
breath caught, because there was a burn there and it fucking hurt, but he
didn't do anything about it. He had a bad feeling that if he stopped Mishka
from kissing him now, Mishka would never bother to try it again.

But wouldn't that be a good thing? Wasn't that what he was
trying to accomplish anyway?

When he first heard Hansel's voice, he didn't register it as
anything notable. Sort of like he was imagining it, or like he'd just expected
Hansel to be there talking all along. Then the surprise hit him, and he pushed
Mishka away, and blinked past him at Hansel.

He should... be in bed, shouldn't he? He didn't fucking look
good, although he did look pleased.

**Coyote:** at 6:27
PM

Mishka jerked in surprise. He whipped around. Someone had
caught him kissing Goro. His blind, automatic reaction was wild defensiveness--
he'd let his guard down, gotten caught up, and someone had managed to sneak up
on him because of it--

And then he saw it was just Hansel, and he relaxed. Just
Hansel. That was fine. Hansel was safe. "Oh," he said breathlessly.
"You're awake."

**Izzy:** at 6:29 PM

"Yup." Hansel kept looking at then and grinning
like an idiot. He needed to sit down, or -- something. No, he needed to find a
window. Trident, window. Right.

He didn't move.

**Lina:** at 6:31 PM

"You should..." Goro lurched off the couch and
moved toward him, automatically. "Here. Sit down." He reached out to
take Hansel's hand, lead him to the couch.

**Izzy:** at 6:40 PM

Hansel pulled back before Goro could take his hand, smile
fading. Still felt -- electrified, somehow, like he might shock Goro if they
touched. And he could still see exactly what he'd done to Goro already. What
the eye had done to him.

And everything hurt. He vaguely remembered Roddy trying to
gently pat his back, before, and the dull ache it'd sent through him. Probably
just shouldn't touch anyone, or let himself be touched.

He really fucking wanted to, though. His hand twitched, and
he met Goro halfway. Fucking ow. But no zap. "Careful," he said
awkwardly. "Just -- really fucking sore." He let himself be led over
to the couch, but before he sat down he remembered, and tensed, and
straightened, and grabbed Goro's arm. "Wait, fucking -- the sky -- is the
sky --."

**Coyote:** at 6:47
PM

"All clear," Mishka said. "No storms visible
on the horizon." Was there magic to detect storms in advance? Maybe that
could help. He had a couple thoughts to tell Goro. Plans. Ideas for the next
time this shit happened. It could wait, though.

Sending, scrying eye, weather magic. And the next fight,
Goro ought to focus on healing and empowering his allies, if possible, not
magic that might just wash off Hansel.

**Lina:** at 6:49 PM

When Hansel grabbed his arm Goro winced, breath catching
again. Damn, he should've let Luci heal him after all, just so this shit didn't
keep happening.

**Izzy:** at 6:52 PM

Clear. All clear. It had been before, though, he remembered,
until it wasn't. Fucking came out of nowhere. He'd just have to listen for
thunder, or --

He realized how hard he'd grabbed Goro, and how badly fucked
up Goro was, still, and jerked his hand away. "Fuck, sorry. Sorry."
His instinct was to hug him, but that would just make things worse. He stumbled
a step and dropped down on the couch instead.

**Lina:** at 7:01 PM

Fuck, he looked so bad still. And Goro didn't have any damn
way to help, not until he got some rest himself or until his wand recharged at
dawn. He took a step back, worrying the hem of his shirt.

He looked between the door, and Mishka. Mishka seemed like
he knew what to do. Goro could just give the two of them some alone time
together while he tried yet again to make himself sleep. He knew they'd
probably both yell at him if he tried to leave, though. Nutjobs.

So he settled for taking a few steps further back, and he
said nothing.

**Coyote:** at 7:05
PM

"Hey, hey, hey," Mishka said, snapping his fingers
and pointing. "I said 'sit down' earlier. Did you hear me say 'get up'?
Because frankly, Goro, I don't recall saying it. We are not done bandaging
you."

Also, Hansel needed food. Goro did too. Mishka hadn't seen
that motherfucker eat.

He pointed again. "Both of you stay. I'll go grab
food."

**Izzy:** at 7:06 PM

"Yeah." Hansel gestured him over. Fidgety
motherfucker. "C'mere."

**Lina:** at 7:09 PM

Well, it was always the easiest thing in the world, going to
Hansel. What wasn't easy was taking a seat on the couch a foot away from him,
not on his lap. He wondered if he'd be able to eat when Mishka brought food.
Was he hungry? Yes, yes he was hungry. And he wanted Hansel to crush him in his
arms, even if it was going to hurt like a motherfucker.

He kept his gaze on the floor.

**Coyote:** at 7:09
PM

Satisfied, Mishka left.

**Izzy:** at 7:16 PM

Hansel watched Mishka go, out of the corner of his eye. He
wasn't hurt -- magic drained, probably, but not hurt. Hansel wanted to call him
back, but someone had to fucking take care of him, he guessed. Him and Goro
both.

And once Mishka was gone, he looked back to Goro. Sitting
half a cushion away from him. He wondered if -- nah. If they thought he was
dangerous, if this had changed their minds, they wouldn't be here. Right? Fuck,
he wasn't sure. Mishka wouldn't care; Mishka hadn't cared about any of it,
anything he'd done, hadn't had to question it to be around him.

Goro, though. He'd almost killed Goro, but knew he was
fucking loyal, and he would probably stick around even if he was scared. Hansel
considered for a moment. Wanted to drag Goro over to him and lean against him,
prop his chin on Goro's head and close his eyes again. Didn't matter if it
fucking hurt.

"Hey," he said after a beat. "You were right.
The thing -- the voice." Shit, this was going to sound like an excuse, if
Goro was freaked out. "I didn't -- I didn't have a choice. You were
right."

**Lina:** at 7:21 PM

Goro looked up at him, wide-eyed. Hansel sounded like he
actually believed it, finally. Relief flooded through him.

"Good," he said. "I mean--I knew, obviously.
I never fucking doubted it, and I mean that. But I'm glad you know it
now."

He considered making some smug crack about how I told you
so, but wasn't really in the mood for it.

**Izzy:** at 7:26 PM

Hansel snorted quietly. Good. Okay, good. Usual prickly
Goro.

He wanted to say why the fuck did you come back to the
castle alone, I could've fucking killed you, you stupid piece of shit, you have
to be careful, do you what I'd do if you got yourself hurt -- if I was the one
that did it --

But instead, he brushed that aside, and gestured for Goro to
come closer again.

**Lina:** at 7:28 PM

Careful, careful. Couldn't just dive in like usual. Goro
scooted closer, reaching his hands for Hansel tentatively, watching him with
eyebrows raised to see if it was okay.

**Izzy:** at 7:31 PM

Ah, fuck that. Once he was close enough, Hansel looped an
arm around his neck and pulled Goro in against his side, hissing through his
teeth at the contact and then settling. Yeah. Better. He didn't hold on too
tight, though, because he knew he wasn't the only one injured here, and Goro
might need to shift away.

**Lina:** at 7:35 PM

Goro squeezed Hansel tightly out of habit, then made himself
stop. Buried his face in its new favorite spot to be, Hansel's chest. His left
eye was still throbbing, but better to have it throbbing against Hansel than
not.

**Izzy:** at 7:38 PM

Hansel winced, and then leaned his head back, and sighed
slowly. This was going to be fine.

**Coyote:** at 7:43 PM

Sugar had made food. Thick, creamy stew with dumplings.
She'd tried making fresh bread as well, but it looked like the dough hadn't
risen properly. He grabbed a few of the hard lumps anyway and tossed them on
the tray.

Sugar had boiled chicken, but left it out of the stew,
aside, for Hansel's sake, so that he didn't have to eat it. Mishka portioned
out bowls. He tossed chicken in his bowl and Goro's bowl, then made one
particularly large and meatless bowl for Hansel. He grabbed the tray, grabbed
his bottle of brandy from earlier, and headed back upstairs.

Goro and Hansel were cuddling.

Ah. Of course they were cuddling. Mishka had left them alone
together for five minutes.

(Why did that make him feel so pleased?)

Mishka stopped and just watched them a moment. Then he
stepped inside, shut the door with his foot, set the tray and the brandy on the
table, and sat on the floor.

**Izzy:** at 7:46 PM

Hansel raised his head again at Mishka's movement, already
drowsy again, blinking it away.

"Hey. Why're you sitting on the floor." He angled
his head to one side. "There's room."

**Coyote:** at 7:48
PM

"Logistics, you fool. I'm not going to eat dumplings
and drink brandy while lying in a three-person pile. Things will spill."

**Izzy:** at 7:49 PM

Hansel grumbled but allowed it.

**Lina:** at 7:54 PM

Goro reluctantly peeled himself away from Hansel to examine
the offerings on the tray. He chose one of the smaller bowls and a spoon, and
took a bite.

At least he hadn't lost any teeth. They were sore still,
anyway. But once the first spoonful of soup made it to his stomach, he realized
how ravenous he fucking once, and started to shovel the rest down heedless of
how his mouth felt.

**Coyote:** at 7:57
PM

Mishka broke the hard lump of bread in half, then began
pulling apart it into smaller pieces without eating it. He ignored his
dumplings and stew. "Hey. Hans."

**Izzy:** at 7:58 PM

Hansel stared at the food without touching it.
"Mm."

**Coyote:** at 8:00
PM

"Are you-- all there? I mean... you-- ah, you seem like
yourself. But. All your memories. You still feel like yourself?"

There was a woman in Alabaster, once, who collapsed in the
middle of the market. She'd convulsed. The healers called it a stroke. Later,
even once she was healthy again, she'd lost pieces of her mind. She couldn't
remember how to brush her teeth or lace her shoes. Had to be taught.

**Izzy:** at 8:02 PM

He looked up from the tray, vacant for a moment, then
frowning as he focused in on Mishka. He hadn't forgotten anything before. At
least -- he didn't think so. Now he wasn't sure. Hadn't even thought about.

"Yeah," he said slowly. "I'm ... fine. I
think."

**Coyote:** at 8:06
PM

Mm. Mishka could check in more detail later. Go over past
events, check basic things.

Hansel had settled on the tray, again. He stared at it
blankly without moving. His arm was still curled around Goro's waist.

Mishka got up. Slipped over to the couch. Put his hand on
Hansel's face, made Hansel look up at him. "Hans," he said, gesturing
to the bowl. "Eat. Please?"

**Izzy:** at 8:06 PM

"Not hungry," he lied through his teeth.

**Lina:** at 8:16 PM

"Shit fucking liar," Goro said, mouth full.

**Coyote:** at 8:18
PM

"I fucking know, right," Mishka said.
"Hansel, darling. If you are going to lie you need to pick something more
believable. You were at the circus all day, since this morning. So likely you
didn't eat lunch. And then after that, Sugar says you were gone for...
literally fucking hours at the castle alone. And then you fought the group--
hard fight, probably burned a lot of energy. Then you got knocked the fuck
unconscious. Then we healed you, which I fucking know makes me ravenous. So
that means... oh, look at that. It's been twelve hours since you ate a
meal."

**Izzy:** at 8:18 PM

Hansel made a disgruntled sound.

**Coyote:** at 8:21
PM

Mishka kept his hand on Hansel's face. "Neshama.
Darling. What's wrong? Why not?"

First plan: talking and cajoling. Backup plans: he could
refuse to eat until Hansel ate as well. Emotional blackmail. That didn't
usually work, but sometimes when Hansel was particularly weak...

Well no. No, not even then. Mishka would still fuckin' try,
though.

**Lina:** at 8:24 PM

Goro swallowed his last bite and wiped his mouth with the
back of his hand. "Feeling sick?" he guessed.

**Izzy:** at 8:25 PM

"Yeah."

**Lina:** at 8:27 PM

"Here." Goro leaned over and picked up one of the
bits of torn bread Mishka had produced. He offered it to Hansel. "Just
this. Try it, then wait. It'll settle your stomach."

**Izzy:** at 8:29 PM

It was just bread. This shouldn't be a problem. He eyed it.
"Yeah. No. I'm good. I -- couldn't keep anything down, before. Couple
days."

**Coyote:** at 8:33
PM

Mishka kissed Hansel's head, then dropped his hand.

He'd try again in an hour or so. If he could just get Hansel
to eat a few bites here and there, it'd help. No point in pushing him now,
though. Better to be careful. Delicate.

He went back to sit on the ground. Tore off pieces of bread
and dipped them in the stew to soften them, then popped them in his mouth. Took
a drink of brandy too, then set it down.

**Lina:** at 8:35 PM

Goro popped the piece of bread in his own mouth when Hansel
wouldn't take it. He eyed Mishka's brandy, then said to Hansel, only half
joking, "Alcohol?"

**Izzy:** at 8:38 PM

Hansel relaxed a bit. They'd dropped it. At least for now --
Jonn had kept fucking trying to feed him, too, no matter how much it didn't
take. But he'd been almost starved to death, then. He was -- fine, now. He
could go a couple days. Wouldn't waste away.

He scoffed at Goro's suggestion, settled in a bit. "For
once, nah."

**Coyote:** at 8:43
PM

"Hey," Mishka said. "Goro." He kept
eating.

**Lina:** at 8:43 PM

"What."

**Coyote:** at 8:46
PM

Mishka's eyes shifted to Hansel. He wasn't sure they should
have this conversation in front of him; might upset him. Or maybe it'd help
Hansel to know they were strategizing about how to stop him.

"That spell you do," Mishka said. "The one
that lets y' like... message people. Talk to 'em. Can you keep one of those
prepared? That way next time, if it... happens again, and I'm not there... you
can message me. Tell me where you are. And I can come faster next time."

**Izzy:** at 8:48 PM

Hansel leaned his head back and closed his eyes again.
"S'good idea."

**Lina:** at 9:04 PM

Goro hesitated. "Eh, I... it is a good idea,
but..." This was tricky to explain. "I can't just keep things
prepared. You know, I'm not like you, I have to meditate and pray in the
mornings to ready myself to use magic. It's like that for most of my spells. It
takes time. I have to choose carefully each day what I think I'm going to need.
Any time spent preparing to Send takes away from another spell I could use to
heal people, or help some other way, or..."

God, he hated having to say this. Nobody else had this
fucking problem. Mishka and Nixie, they knew their magic intuitively, and Roddy
could just pull out his lute. It was just fuckin' Goro who had to spend time
getting ready beforehand, just Goro who'd been utterly unequipped to stand
against Hansel when he needed it, just Goro whose magic had completely failed
to take hold.

He stared down at his hands, unable to finish explaining.
Probably, it was the best idea. Maybe calling for help was all he could do.

**Coyote:** at 9:06
PM

"Ah," Mishka said. "Ah, clever point. Well--
Roddy can do it, then." He set aside his bowl, having finished eating, and
stayed on the floor.

**Izzy:** at 9:08 PM

Hansel opened his eyes to stare at the ceiling. "Need a
magic item, like -- that fuckin' mirror you got. Then I can tell you.
Before."

**Lina:** at 9:12 PM

"Mm. Maybe Lyra could make us a new set."

**Coyote:** at 9:14
PM

"I have no clue who that is, but it sounds like a
plan," Mishka said.

Then he pulled something out of his pocket.

It was a necklace. A thin black and silver chain. At the
end, there was a small pendant: a blue gem the size of a thumbnail, intricately
carved with odd arcane symbols. It was one of the scrying eyes.

Mishka toyed with it. Then held it out to Goro, dangling the
pendant from the chain.

**Lina:** at 9:15 PM

Goro took it and examined it, holding it up to the light.
"Where's the other half?"

**Coyote:** at 9:16
PM

Mishka blew out his breath, forcing himself to relax. Then
he pointed to an earring he wore. It was black and silver as well, and it had a
matching blue gemstone.

**Lina:** at 9:18 PM

Goro looked more closely into the stone Mishka had handed
him. And, eerily, he could see an image of himself, examining the thing. He
held his arm straight out, passing it back to Mishka. "I don't want
this."

**Coyote:** at 9:19
PM

"Yeah," Mishka said, taking it back.
"Figured. Worth a shot." He put it back in his pocket.

**Izzy:** at 9:20 PM

Hansel straightened a bit and tugged on Goro gently.
"Hey. What if I had it? Keep an eye on each other."

**Lina:** at 9:20 PM

"What, you and Mishka? You've got those lockets I gave
you."

**Izzy:** at 9:20 PM

"No, idiot, you and me."

**Coyote:** at 9:21
PM

Mishka paused. He pulled the pendant back out of his pocket.
He looked at Goro.

**Lina:** at 9:22 PM

Goro shrugged. "The mirrors are better. They get hot
when one of them's open. So then you know."

**Izzy:** at 9:24 PM

Hansel studied him for a second. So then you know.
"It's not like I'd fuckin' spy on you. Keep the thing in your pocket or
something."

**Coyote:** at 9:25
PM

Mishka said, "The purpose of making it a necklace is
that you can tuck it into your shirt whenever you don't want it looked through.
Makes no difference to me whether you use it or not, but... there it is."

His jaw clenched.

**Lina:** at 9:27 PM

Oh. They'd got it backwards. Interesting.

Of course, though. They knew he was a paranoid motherfucker.

"I don't... think you'd spy on me," he said.
"I didn't--want--to spy on you." Either of them. "Either of
you."

**Izzy:** at 9:28 PM

Hansel shrugged. "I don't give a shit. I'll take it off
if I'm doing something you don't need to see."

**Coyote:** at 9:35
PM

"Look," Mishka said. "Strategically.
Logically. It's not about spying. From a practical standpoint, I can't teleport
to where either of you are unless I know where that is. The clamshell mirror--
it's a neat idea, but it won't let me come to you. The visual range isn't big
enough. And the mirror... Hans, if it overcomes you before you can open the
mirror and message me, it won't help. But the eye. It'd let me see where you
are so I can get there."

Mishka held the pendant out to Hansel instead. "How
about this instead. Goro-- if you don't want it, Hans can take it. If something
goes wrong, Roddy can message me. And then I can look through the eye and go to
where Hansel is."

**Lina:** at 9:39 PM

Goro nodded. "Makes more sense to me to do it that way."
He thought a moment. "Maybe if you--" he gestured between the two
gems-- "could get a third one, but... probably doesn't work that
way."

**Coyote:** at 9:41
PM

"Dunno," Mishka said. "Never tried it with
three."

**Izzy:** at 9:46 PM

"Probably find a way to make it work." Hansel
leaned his head back again.

**Coyote:** at 9:49
PM

Mishka glanced at Goro. "A minute ago I handed you that
pendant and you shot it down, no questions asked. Now you want a third?
Why?" All filthy jokes aside.

**Lina:** at 9:54 PM

Goro held his hands up defensively. He looked at the floor
again. "Fine, no third one. It was just a thought. Keeping in
communication and all."

**Izzy:** at 9:56 PM

Hansel gave Mishka a look. An it's okay, let me handle this
look. He nudged Goro again. "Didn't answer the question, jackass."

**Lina:** at 9:56 PM

"Keeping in communication and all. God."

**Izzy:** at 9:59 PM

"Hey. Idiot. That's what Mishka was suggesting in the
first place, when you fuckin' turned it down." He paused. "Listen, if
you could've checked on me, would've made shit a lot easier. I'm fuckin'
agreeing with you."

**Lina:** at 10:02 PM

"So what, I'm not allowed to change my mind? Be talked
into things? Fuck's sake. I thought about it, and you convinced me, and--"
He took in a breath, then exhaled through his teeth, shaking his head, eyes on
the floor again. God, he wanted out of here. Didn't want to walk out on Hansel,
though.

**Izzy:** at 10:03 PM

"All right, all right, hey." Hansel pulled him in
and kissed the top of his head. "S'fine."

**Coyote:** at 10:07
PM

Mishka got up stiffly, not looking at Goro. Grabbed the
empty bowls and stacked them, then tossed in the uneaten pieces of bread. He
vanished outside the door for a minute, then returned.

He set the pendant and earring on the table and left them
there.

**Izzy:** at 10:10 PM

Hansel watched him move. Tense. Frozen over. Hm.

"Mishka. Khochav," he said quietly, and shifted so
that there was room on the other side of him. "Will you fuckin' sit down
with me already?"

**Coyote:** at 10:17
PM

Mishka itched. He just wanted to fuckin' decide which one of
them would take the eyes. Goro had gotten knocked out twice. That was
avoidable. He was sick of arguing about it, though.

He gritted his teeth. He wanted to say: Look, this isn't a
fun conversation for me either.

Instead, he sat next to Hansel and kicked up his feet.
Closed his eyes. Started thinking about other strategies.

**Izzy:** at 10:21 PM

Pleased, Hansel put his arm around Mishka's shoulders --
wincing again, a bit, not caring -- and kissed the side of his head. Nuzzled
against him for a second. Didn't figure it'd help that much, but did it anyway.

Then he nodded to the scrying eyes. "Goro, grab me the
fuckin' earring, all right. One of you fuckers needs to keep an eye on me. I
don't care who."

**Lina:** at 10:32 PM

Goro leaned forward and took it, then sat up, planning to
put it in Hansel's ear. Weird, though. He didn't have any piercings himself,
and he'd never put in an earring before. His fingertips tingled, thinking of
how delicately he'd have to touch Hansel's ear.

Come to think of it, Hansel probably just meant Give me the
earring. So Goro handed it to him.

Then he leaned forward and grabbed the pendant, and held it
out to Mishka.

**Coyote:** at 10:34
PM

Mishka took the pendant, eyebrows raised. He shrugged.
"Didn't strike me as your style," he said, amused, to Hansel.

**Izzy:** at 10:36 PM

Hansel pulled away from both of them for a second to fasten
it in, thought about saying, yeah, well, had to sell my gold rings to eat,
because it was the truth, but that probably wasn't something Mishka would want
to be reminded of. He just shrugged instead and settled back, putting his arms
around each of them again.

**Coyote:** at 10:57
PM

Mishka lay there a while, curled against him, eyes closed.
They, once he was sleepy and warm, he reluctantly pulled himself up, yawning.
"Goro," he said. "Help me grab some things?"

**Lina:** at 11:23 PM

Fucking transparent as shit, but Hansel probably wasn't
feeling well enough to stop them. And that made Goro wonder who was going to
watch Hansel, but he realized Mishka was probably just going to drag him right
outside the door, and not anywhere far away, so what the hell. He nodded and
wiggled out carefully from underneath Hansel's arm, and followed Mishka out of
the room.

**Coyote:** at 11:27
PM

Mishka hummed quietly to himself, trying to decide if he
could actually think of something they needed to grab. More blankets? Couldn't
decide.

He headed towards the empty balcony room. "Hey,"
he said, once they were out of earshot. "One of us ought to stay with him
tonight. I'm fine with it bein'... y'know... you."

**Lina:** at 11:28 PM

"Oh. Yeah. Nah, it can be you. That's fine." He
turned to go.

**Coyote:** at 11:31
PM

Mishka frowned. He didn't like this not-talking thing Goro
did. He needed to develop strategies to get past it, somehow. His usual things
weren't working.

He caught Goro's arm. Tried to figure out what to ask. Came
up blank, though. Just kept holding onto it.

**Lina:** at 11:33 PM

Ah, fuck. Mishka was gonna fucking kiss him again, wasn't
he? Alright, he had to be strong this time. He had explain that this wasn't
going to work for him. He turned back around, sideways, just enough to look at
Mishka expectantly, see if the kiss was actually going to happen.

**Coyote:** at 11:35
PM

And now Goro was looking at him and Mishka still hadn't even
come up with one goddamn thing to say.

"What?" Mishka said.

Oh. Yeah. Fuckin' great, Mishka. Real fucking good job,
that. What. Like some kind of moron. Mishka dropped his arm. "Right,
right, I stopped you. 'Course. Listen. Why, though? How come you don't want to
sleep with Hansel?"

**Lina:** at 11:37 PM

"I do. But you're his husband." Granted, that
hadn't stopped them on the ship. "Hey, how come we can't just both... like
when we were..."

God, he had the feeling this was a stupid question. Like the
answer was supposed to be obvious to him.

**Coyote:** at 11:40
PM

"I mean--" Two questions, there. That meant Mishka
got to pick which one he liked. "We're not husbands," Mishka
corrected. "Hansel and I are divorced. What with me, y'know, ditching him
to die and all. And you're his..." He waved. "Partner? Not sure what
we're calling this. I don't expect, y'know, dibs."

**Lina:** at 11:45 PM

"Oh, shut the fuck up, you two call each other
'husband' all the time. Pick a story and stick to it."

December 18, 2018

**Coyote:** at 8:33
AM

Mishka took a step back, caught off-guard by Goro’s tone. He
looked at Goro for a long moment.

Re-contextualized what Goro has said.

Mishka had told Hansel, months ago, not to call him husband.
It had been a sore spot. They had only been reconciled for a few days. Mishka
had been broken, and had needed time to gather himself. It had bothered him.
He’d always thought they would be husbands again at some... undefined point in
the future... but then, at that moment, right when they’d gotten back together,
he hadn’t been sure yet.

Things had changed.

He called Hansel husband all the time in his head; he’d just
been trying to avoid saying it out loud.

And fucking failing, apparently.

It felt different now, which was probably why he kept
slipping up. They called each other beloved and khochav and neshama and ahuvi.
They lived together and slept in the same bed.

Mishka said, “I’ve tried not to call Hansel my husband
because it fucks me up. At this point, yeah. Sure. He’s my fuckin’ husband. I’m
sorry. I was deflecting because I didn’t want to answer your question.”

**Lina:** at 2:47 PM

What the hell. Imagine being fucked up by getting to call
Hansel your husband. Mishka was living on another plane of existence. Goro
didn't fuckin' get it, but he sensed this was going to be yet another "not
his business" thing.

"Yeah, so uh, why don't you want to answer the
question?" He felt queasy, all the sudden. Like he knew he wasn't going to
like what Mishka said.

**Coyote:** at 3:32
PM

Mishka sat heavily in the armchair. He suddenly felt just so
fucking tired.

It had just been a bad fucking day. And all he wanted was to
go lie in Hansel’s arms and forget about it. He still remembered the way his
rapier felt sinking into Hansel— like puncturing a bag of wet meat. Sickening.
He got it now. Why it fucked Hansel up.

He just wanted to make his fucking husband happy.

He closed his eyes and thought about the way Hansel looked
when he walked in on them kissing— the way he looked so fucking pleased. He’d
just wanted to make this work, somehow.

“Why don’t I want to share a bed with you?” he said.
“Because... because I’m fucking scared of you. I mean— fuck, Goro. I let you—
fucking— on the fucking trip to Calimport, I let you... touch me, and sleep in
the same bed with me. Fuck.” He felt like throwing up. “And then you come back
here, and— you’re avoiding me. You tell me you haven’t decided if you want to
kill me or not. You say the only reason you wouldn’t is because I’d incinerate
you. And then you ask me why I can’t sleep around you.”

Once he’d started talking, he couldn’t stop. He should stop.
Just go to bed.

“I missed you,” Mishka said. “I still miss you. I miss
getting drunk with you and talking the way we used to. I miss lying in bed with
you on the ship. I miss the way you’d watch me sometimes. I liked you. I don’t
know what I fucking did. I wish you’d just fucking tell me.” His voice was
hoarse. “I don’t know what the fuck to do, Goro.”

**Lina:** at 7:44 PM

Goro stood there, gaping, like Mishka had slapped him.

His chin bobbed as he opened and closed his mouth uselessly.
All that... everything Mishka had said, he wanted to go back and hear it all
again, make sure he understood right. "I... you..." He blinked a few
times. "You didn't do anything, I..." It's not about what you've
done, it's what you might do. Now, how was that fucking fair? But even Hansel
had said it.

Oh, god, I missed you too. But he was trying not to. He was
trying...

He sputtered and put a hand on his chest. "You're
scared of me? Did you not see the way your--did you not see the way Hansel beat
me to a bloody pulp in a matter of moments? Did you think--fuck, Mishka, I
don't--" He stopped, laughing incredulously, but Mishka wasn't fucking
joking. "I don't want to kill you. I don't want to fucking kill you, I was
just..."

Speechless. He was fucking speechless. He'd done something
dreadfully fucking wrong and not even realized it.

**Coyote:** at 9:39
PM

Mishka just couldn’t stop thinking about that fucking night
on the ship.

The thing about me, Mishka, is I get a little bit
protective, Goro had said.

I’d like to know if I want to kill you or not, Goro had
said.

Show me how you want me to touch you, Goro had said.

Yeah. Mishka was going to fucking throw up. He couldn’t get
the feeling of skin off him; could remember the exact way Goro’s hands had
felt, and it made him want to vomit. His eyes felt hot and wet and he
realized—a beat too late—he was crying. Fucking crying. He put his head down
and took a shaking breath. Tried to steady it.

**Lina:** at 9:47 PM

Goro's eyes widened, and he took a couple steps back.
"Mishka," he said. Oh, god. Oh, god, what was this about?
"Mishka, I'm... I'm serious. I'm not going to hurt you."

Didn't add up, though. He wouldn't be standing there crying
if he were just afraid. He'd fucking leave, or attack him or something.

**Coyote:** at 11:30
PM

Maybe he’d leave you and love me instead, Goro had said.
Hansel was going to leave him.

Yeah. Mishka was going to throw up. He staggered to the
balcony, leaned over, and vomited. Shouldn’t have had brandy with his stew.
He’d wanted to relax.

He wiped his mouth.

“I’m sorry,” Mishka said. He slid down to the floor. Goro
didn’t want to hurt him. Okay. Mishka was over-reacting. It was just—“Look, I
can’t… sleep in bed with you—”

He thought he’d gotten somewhere. He'd thought Goro was
giving in. That night on the ship. He’d thought Goro liked him. And then Goro
turned on him without a word, without speaking to him. It was too quick, too
easy. It made his spine prickle.

“I’m sorry,” Mishka said. “Look. It freaks me out. Knowing
you’d—turn that fast. It’s fuckin’ justified, alright? I’d shank somebody for
hurting Hansel, too. I’d shank me for hurting Hansel. I get it. You didn’t do
anything wrong. I’m just—fuckin’ flighty, and…” He struggled, there. “I can’t
sleep in bed with you,” Mishka said. “I can’t sleep in bed around—anyone,
usually. Except Hansel.”

Mishka got to his feet. Pressed the heel of his hand to his
face. “I don’t want to hurt you, either,” he said. “I’m sorry. I don’t want
this to be a—fuckin’ fight.”

I love you all, Goro had said in the cellar. Mishka
wondered, briefly, if that had actually been directed at him, then dismissed
it. Probably not.

Okay, Mishka thought.

Okay. Plans.

Mishka put his hand down. He leveled his voice.

“Look,” Mishka said. “You and me. Let’s back off. I’m going
to leave you alone for a few days. I feel like something’s pissing you off, and
I don’t know…” Goro said he didn’t do anything. Huh. “I don’t know what's going
on, and I don’t know how to fix it. I can't fuckin' do this with you anymore. I
need a couple days to cool off. You need a couple days to cool off.
Motherfucker. I can't be... fuckin'..." He couldn't be vulnerable around
Goro anymore. He bit his tongue. Wasn't gonna work. "Doesn't matter. I need
a couple days to cool off."

Then, for a split second, he hesitated. Goro probably needed
to hear this, too. “Hansel. He’s not gonna fuckin’ leave you if you upset me or
if you don’t like me. You can tell ‘im what happened and shit.”

December 19, 2018

**Lina:** at 9:54 AM

"But I do like you," Goro blurted. Not really
thinking about it. What the fuck was he doing? This was what he'd wanted,
wasn't it, for him and Mishka to keep some distance from each other?

But it just popped out.

**Coyote:** at 10:32
AM

God, this really must be how Hansel felt. Didn't matter,
though. Wasn't doing it.

"Well you don't fuckin' act like it," Mishka said.
"You've been avoiding me since Calimport. I don't know what I did--"
He stopped there. "Y'fuckin' glare at me when I come down to the dungeon
and try to get you healed. You--" God, this was fucking petty.

All the heat bled out of him.

"Look," Mishka said. "I'm sorry. I don't
think y'like me quite the way I like you. I like the assholishness. I don't
mind it. But sometimes there needs to be..." He grit his teeth again. He
hated admitting this. "Sometimes there needs to be-- niceness, and shit. I
almost had to kill my hus..." Saying it like that might upset Goro.
"I almost had to kill someone I loved today. You can't hit me when I'm
weak like that. Please. Just-- stop."

**Lina:** at 10:53 AM

"I almost got killed by someone I love today. You
don't--" He spun around and kicked a chair leg. Damn it, he couldn't stop
running off his mouth. He'd go bite out his own tongue, maybe, see if that
helped.

"I'm not hitting you," he said, raising his voice,
whirling back around and starting toward Mishka. "You wanna see what it's
like when I'm really being an asshole? You wanna see?" He backed away
again, because he actually didn't want to fucking scare him. "I've been
avoiding you because I'm afraid of what you might do to me, you fucker. That's
all. Because if I--" He pointed back and forth between the two of them, then
decided, fuck, he didn't really want to explain. If I fall in love with you and
you fuck around with me, I'm going to hate myself.

He'd already told Mishka he was scared of tight spaces, not
being able to breathe, and not being able to see.

He didn't need to give him more ammunition.

He turned and started out of the room. Caught himself on the
frame of the door. "Tell Hansel that... I need to sleep, to recover and
get my magic back. He knows I sleep better alone. But I'll come back if he
needs me." And he continued on his way, trying to ignore the painful
twinge of wondering whether Mishka would actually deliver the message, and if
Hansel would just wonder all night where he'd gone. Goro needed to get out of
their fucking way for now.

**Izzy:** at 11:17 AM

Hansel lingered on the couch for a while, abruptly feeling
cold, the worst of the soreness and tiredness coming back to him. He tried
leaning his head back and closing his eyes, but as half-dead as he still felt
-- fuck, felt like he could sleep for a decade -- it wasn't comfortable enough.
Hadn't seemed so bad when Mishka and Goro had been there.

They'd been gone for a fucking while. He rubbed at his face
and pushed himself up. Shouldn't sleep on the couch. Didn't want to sleep
alone. He thought about just going and finding them, but Eldath knew where they
were. He could just step out into the hallway and yell Mishka's name, tell him
to come to bed, for fucksake, that Hansel didn't want to be alone. That he
needed him.

If I had my way, you'd never leave my fucking bed, Goro had
said.

He groaned quietly to himself. He just -- wanted both of
them. Felt safer when they were together. Goro was fucked up and Hansel wanted
to hold him, and he was fucked up and wanted Mishka to hold him. He was hungry
and ill and injured, and it was fucking great that he could stop thinking about
how he'd broken his tusk murdering Serena, but his entire crew had still almost
fucking died, fucking again. He wasn't ... fine about it.

The thing had said it wasn't done with him. It had made him
do things, this time, that it hadn't before -- Hansel didn't fucking have
magic. Left him feeling hollowed out and used. Didn't know what it would be
able to make him do next time. He needed to fucking talk, or something, and
Mishka was the only person he knew how to talk to about shit like this, and he
-- wanted to be able to talk to Goro.

They'd come back. He was just fucking exhausted, and fucking
afraid, he realized, and hated it. Thought of being curled up in a cave under a
storm that knew his name.

He pushed himself along the wall, to the corner, where he'd
left Taavit's silver trident. Took it with him to the bedroom, leaning on it
heavily, and propped it up next to the bed, where it'd be near to arm's reach
if he needed it, then collapsed back into the bed. He shifted around, trying to
find a comfortable position, before realizing there wasn't going to be a
fucking comfortable position and just cocooning himself in the covers, curled
up on his side as small as he could get, head tucked between his arms protectively.

It still wasn't comfortable, or warm, and he couldn't stop
listening for thunder, but he felt himself drifting off anyway. For the first
time in -- had to be years -- he remembered his mother's face, and her black
eyes and black hair, and the tiredness in her voice when she told him, You're
not a monster, sweetheart. He got it. He was pretty fucking tired of telling
himself that, too.

[end]

December 20, 2018

**Izzy:** at 9:08 PM

Title: Break. Summary: Mishka tries to take care of Goro. Goro
is very upset. Hansel wakes up, they chat for a while. Then Mishka and Goro
fuck off to have a difficult conversation, and Hansel goes to bed alone.