Minkowski Commanding

**"Minkowski Commanding"** is the twenty-first episode of the podcast. It was released on 27 May 2015.

## Episode Description

Following the Plant Monster's reappearance, Minkowski makes it her mission to eliminate the mutant stowaway once and for all. But when her quarry proves surprisingly difficult to corner, the Commander resorts to increasingly desperate and dangerous tactics. As the deadly game of cat and mouse intensifies and the lines between roles start to blur, Minkowski must decide on the best path to take to ensure the safety of her crew. Plus, Howard Beale breakdowns, escalating hostilities, Holy Hand Grenades, friendly conversations, and Heart of Darkness lighting.

## Plot Summary

The episode opens with Commander Renee Minkowski crawling through the air ducts of the Hephaestus and recording day 6 of her Special Operations log. She reports on an enemy that she is pursuing in the vents, that she believes is using the shadows to disguise its presence. Her report is interrupted by Communications Officer Douglas Eiffel, who offers her substitute huevos rancheros in a significant tone shift, and asks her to stop tracking her enemy, the Plant Monster (Blessed Eternal). Minkowski chastises him for using the line to not report a sighting of the Plant Monster, and maintains her position on finding and killing Blessed Eternal. She doesn’t want to let the situation spiral out of control, and their argument is cut off when the Plant Monster roars and attacks Minkowski.

On Day 7 of the log, Minkowski details tracks left in the vents by the Plant Monster, but is interrupted by Eiffel checking in again. He is annoyed that she is back up in the vents, since she apparently agreed to relax while Eiffel popped her shoulder back into place the day prior. She shuts off the comms, irritated, and continues her hunt. She senses something as she taps along the vents in her path (something she spent six hours mapping), and shoots. She does not succeed in shooting the Plant Monster, but instead shoots a hole in the ceiling of the mess hall.

On Day 9 of the log, Minkowski discusses changing her strategy by dousing the Plant Monster with acid, but is interrupted again by Eiffel, who got pinned to the wall by a net Minkowski set up to trap the Plant Monster. Minkowski waves him off, saying she will get him after her rotation finishes in three hours.

On Day 10, Minkowski says that the acid she deployed the day prior caused the Plant Monster to grow larger and deadlier, and asks Hera to turn out the lights for a new strategy. Eiffel and Hera try to stage an intervention to help Minkowski reassess her pursuit and try a safer approach. She snaps at Hera and insults her ability to manage the station, and Hera leaves the conversation, with Eiffel trying to placate the commander.

Three hours into Day 10, Minkowski asks Eiffel to patch her through to Hilbert, to see if he has any information to help her catch the Plant Monster. Hilbert says that the genetics of the Plant Monster lend it to being highly adaptive to many stimuli, and as she tracks down a tentacle, the monster attacks her again.

On the final day of the log, Minkowski has armed herself with most of the armory, notably including her harpoon. Eiffel finally fully snaps at her, and questions her motives. Minkowski retorts that “as laughable as the universe seems to find it, I am in charge of this disaster.” She is desperate, pushing herself to solve one problem, to help them somehow get home. Eiffel asks her to sleep but ultimately relents, and Minkowski discovers the lair the Plant Monster built. She finds a lamp that it used the screwdriver from Episode 20: The Paranoia Game to build, realizing that all it wanted was a source of light. Minkowski forms a truce with the Plant Monster, while Hera informs her that Eiffel got caught in another trap and is about to get doused in acid.

Minkowski gives up the hunt, rests, and reconciles with Eiffel the next day. They agree to work on a station task together, when the alarm goes off. Hera reports a small spacecraft approaching the Hephaestus, and when Minkowski addresses the spacecraft, introducing herself as the commanding officer, the person in the craft is confused. Over the comms, they reveal themselves to also be a commanding officer of the U.S.S. Hephaestus, Captain Isabel Lovelace.

## External links

* Listen on Libsyn.
* Official script.