Zoe's Diary Entry No. 97

"Mom!" Zoe called, stepping inside the door and looking around confusedly when no one replied. There was no sign that her mom had gone out.

She'd just come back from college for the fourth weekend since the semester began, always feeling a bit anxious about Carrie. Her dad's death hung far back in Zoe's memories, but his presence seemed to linger on. His pictures never moved from their place on the walls and bedroom drawers; his outfits still hung in the closet; his features--eyes, hair, smile--emerged as a startling reminder every time Zoe looked in the mirror. The most palpable form of his memory, however, was in Carrie's grief. Her mom was as strong and as protective as ever, but her eyes were a shade duller, never able to light up the same again.

Growing more concerned by the moment, Zoe did a sweep of the living room and kitchen before heading down the hall to their rooms. She wasn't in her own room either. Hesitating, Zoe turned to her childhood bedroom, still decked out in the pink streamers and stuffed animals she'd hugged to sleep each night. It looked the same as ever, and sitting on the floor in front of Zoe's desk, Carrie sat there crying.

"Mom!" Zoe cried, kneeling by her. "What's wrong? What happened?"

Carrie held her hand tightly and smiled. "Nothing, dear. I found your diary, and it's just--so many happy memories."

"My diary?" Zoe echoed, looking down at the little moleskin notebook she'd long forgotten. "Let me see. What are you reading right now?"

"This right here. From a long time ago..."

Zoe sat by Carrie, holding one side of the notebook and examining her neat, round handwriting. The words brought back a flood of memories. She remembered the intense anticipation that had led up that day, a day of absolute joy in a dreary and violent time. She remembered the beauty of that garden, the sun glancing off leaves and glossy fruits, the entire city spread out below...

\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_

Dear Diary,

Today I got to spend the ENTIRE day playing with Sam! AND I got to see Auntie Shavir's garden home.

We left our house very early, and Mommy gave me a lot of sweaters and jackets to wear. I felt like one of the fat snowmen we made with Play Doh in school last week. Then we rode in a podcar all the way to Auntie Shavir's garden. The car talked about terror people who attack buildings. Then it talked about lots of rain and storms.

I was happy to see Auntie Shavir when we got there, and Mommy was so happy as well. We first had to walk up a lot and lot of stairs, and then we saw the garden. It was HUGE! There were lots of green plants and vegetables. Mommy showed me the tomatoes, cucumbers, and potatoes. Those are my favorite vegetables. It was also very high so I could see a lot of the city. Mommy showed me where our house is.

But that's not the BEST part! I found SAM! He was hiding under a table, and he was happy when I found him. He kept licking me until I was all wet and gooey. We first played tag where he ran everywhere and I chased him. I hugged him around the neck so he couldn't move. Then I ran and he tried to catch me. He always licked me when he caught up. Then Mommy and Auntie Shavir left, so Sam followed them on a bridge. It was SO HIGH UP! When I looked down, the ground was five thousand feet away! But Sam ran across, so I ran after him.

Then we played hide and seek. I was hiding in the lettuce when Mommy suddenly came and called me. She said that they needed my help to move all the vegetables. I carried a lot of boxes. Sam followed me everywhere and I kept tripping over him. He tried to eat one of the onions I was carrying and then his ears went all flat because I yelled at him.

Then a lot of people suddenly came out. Auntie Shavir was yelling and running around. She looked scared. Mommy looked scared as well. Then it started raining. Expect it wasn't like normal rain. It was so loud and strong. And there was even ICE! It kept hitting everything and it was SO LOUD! I could not hear ANYTHING! The whole world was gray colored. I got really really scared but I could not find Mommy.

I tried to call her but I could not hear her. I could not breathe. I thought I had stopped breathing. Then Sam came! He found me and touched my hand with his wet slimy nose. And then he kept licking me. I hugged him and followed him. We hid together behind some very tall boxes. The whole time I was so scared, but Sam stayed right by me. He sat down so I could hug him around the neck.

Then finally, the rain stopped. Mommy found me with Sam and took me home. I was VERY VERY sad about saying bye to Sam. He licked my hand when I said bye. Then he barked at me when we started to go. I ran back to give him one last hug. Then we went home.

\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_

Closing the diary, Zoe leaned over to wrap her arms around her mother now, leaning against Carrie's shoulder.

"That was such a happy time," Zoe muttered.

"I'm just glad," Carrie said, smiling, "That you had so many protectors, all of your life. Alright now, don't cry. Thank you for always checking in with me like this. I'm alright, girl. Come on, get up. I baked all sorts of goods when I heard you're coming back this weekend. You have to try this newest vegan muffin recipe..."

Author's note: Written from a college student who's ready to go home haha. Missing my mastiff boy at home 😭😭😭