Chapter 20

Akira is asked to select which choir costume she is to wear, a boy's costume, or a girl's. Which ever one she picks, she will wear on stage, before a live audience, and in front of the judges.

## Features of This Chapter

### Time Line

About one week leading up to the choir competition

### Transition Milestones

Akira cements her own personal status of a tween girl by selecting the girl's choir costume to wear. She defends her choice in front of the Choir Director, and Mom.

### Relationship Evolution

Both Akira and Rumi are nervous just before the curtain goes up on the choir performance. They romantically hold hands to comfort one another.

### Lessons Learned

Akira stays by her decision to wear the girl's costume, realizing that she will be seen by all as an authentic girl.

ORE GA WATASHI NI NARU MADE ( UNTIL I BECOME ME )

CHAPTER 20 OF THE MANGA (REVISED ENGLISH TRANSLATION)

## Previously

When a little first grade girl, named Miu Goto, befriends Akira, and begins to look up to her as an older girl role model, Akira becomes somewhat apprehensive and worrisome. Akira thinks that she (supposedly) can never be a good role model since she used to be a boy. Nevertheless, Miu and Akira begin spending some time together. This, for some unexplained reason, causes Rumi to begin to feel slight twinges of jealousy. Enough so that Akira notices that Rumi sometimes tries to avoid her. However, when Rumi has troubles at her home, and then comes to Akira's home to stay the night, the two girls 'bare their souls' to one another, and try to patch up any misunderstandings that may have come between the two best friends.

## This Chapter's Story

On White Day, the holiday wherein boys give chocolate to the girls, Shouma approaches Akira, and gives her a box of expensive chocolates (lover's chocolates?). Akira is quite surprised, and thanks him. She then merely tells him that he shouldn't have bothered.

Later that day, in the afternoon, the boys and girls in the school choir are in the auditorium, practicing for the upcoming choir competition. In the group, Rumi is standing on Akira's right, and Erika is on her left. Suddenly, Erika turns around to her back, and sharply berates Kikuchi (the former school bully) for singing off key! He loudly says that he is definitely NOT doing so! But then he abruptly apologizes! Another girl asks him if he has a cold ? Your voice sounds weird! Could it be that your voice is changing ? Another says that his voice sounds strange. The music teacher says, nevertheless, to continue with the choir practice. After the practice, a boy asks Kikuchi when did his voice suddenly begin to change ? Yesterday. The boy says that he wants his voice to change, too! One of girls asks Erika if this happens to girls, too ? Some do, but not at the same level as what happens with boys.

Rumi and Akira are by themselves. Akira asks Rumi---

" Rumi ! What do you think of ***my*** (lit. *Watashi* {feminine}) voice ?

" It's so adorable !!! But I think your voice is slightly lower than all the other girl's voices. "

Akira thinks to herself that, honestly, she is glad that her voice has not changed. However, she did not like it one bit when her body hair began growing. Is it because I don't want them to find out that I used to be a boy ? Or......... (Akira is staring at her outstretched hand).........

Just then, the Choir Director asks for Akira to come see her for a second. Walking into a side room, Akira sees the Choir Director holding up two competition outfits. One is a boy's outfit, consisting of a white dress shirt, and black dress pants held up by black suspenders. The other is a girl's outfit, consisting of a white button-up-the-front dress blouse with a pink bow tie in front, and a gray pleated mini-skirt held up by black suspenders. The Choir Director explains---

" These are the Chorus Competition Costumes. Though, if you, Akira-kun, do not like one of them, or are uncomfortable wearing one, we can arrange for everyone to wear the boy's outfit. That way you will not be made to fell uncomfortable wearing a girl's outfit. Which one do you like ? Which one will you want to wear in front of the audience and judges ? " (The school administration, officials, and teachers know that Akira used to be a boy, but keep that information completely secret and private. None of the student body knows!)

" Err.......Um....... ?!?!? " Akira he-haws around for a while, sweating profusely. Then, in a decisive move, she selects the girl's costume, with the blouse and mini-skirt. " THIS ONE....... "

The Choir Director breaks into a very surprised look in her face. Akira continues, "When I go to Jr. High School...... I'll have to wear *a sailor suit with a pleated mini-skirt anyway !* So....... it's okay, **It's Okay** !!!" "I see......thank you.", concludes the Choir Director. Akira is dismissed. Akira thanks the Choir Director, but tells herself that it was so, so nerve-wracking making that choice. Akira wanders in the hallway, lost in thought. She argues with herself, thinking that now the Choir Director will think of her as a reckless girl regarding making decisions. Okay, but how will she explain her decision about the choir costume to her mom ? She thinks back to times when mom made fun of her wearing girl's clothes, and how mom 'shot down' the idea of her buying her first shirt / mini-skirt combination while they were in the store (see Chapter 8). Akira further wonders if mom will outright tell her that she looks real silly in the girl's choir outfit ?

Akira ends up in the Infirmary, to check on Miu. Miu is there, and greets Akira with a big---

" Hello, Big Sis Akira ! "

Akira is kinda embarrassed, but tells Miu that she will braid Miu's hair (good practice for Akira!). Miu is 'on Cloud 9', showing sheer joy over the offer. Akira, however, while she begins the braiding process, silently, mournfully, pleads to herself to let circumstances be so that she can continue to be 'Big Sis' ...........

The day of the choir competition, finds Mom and Akira at the auditorium, where the all the choir programs will be presented to the judges. Akira is in the girl's dressing room, while mom waits outside in the lobby. Akira presents herself to mom; this is the first time mom has seen the girl's costume, now worn by Akira. It is a button-up-the-front dress shirt, with a pink, fluffy bow tie at the front of the collar, a gray pleated mini-skirt held up by black suspenders, sheer white tights, and black oxford shoes. Akira has her hair in twin braids. Mom only grunts a noncommittal, "Will you be okay?" Akira squeaks out a, " Yeah! " So, to break away, Akira announces that she will be going to get set up for the competition with the other teens. Akira again thinks negatively, wondering what does mom *really* think ? Will mom like that fact that she, Akira, will be seen in public as an authentic girl ......... ?

Akira enters the large room that has been assigned to their school's choir. She is greeted by the Choir Director with a hearty, "Good Morning, Fujimiya-san!" Akira returns the 'Good Morning'. The Choir Director takes one look at Akira, and gives her honest and heartfelt opinion---

" THAT REALLY LOOKS GOOD ON YOU ! "

" Ah!.......Ehh........that is ........ ", is all that Akira can squeak out. Akira nervously grabs the side of her pleated mini-skirt, crumpling the fabric up in her fist, and thereby almost showing her white panties underneath. " For ***me*** (lit. *Ore* {masculine}) to be wearing these kinds of clothes.....isn't it *weird* ? ", quietly squawks Akira.

" Why would it be ? ", nonchalantly answers the Choir Director. " This is the one costume that Fujimiya-san chose, there's nothing weird about it at all !!! "

Next, the Choir Director shouts, "OKAY, THEN, EVERYONE SET UP ON STAGE !"

Akira, and the rest of the choir are ready. Just before the curtain goes up, the announcer states the name of this choir, and the name of the school that they represent. Most in the audience display a hearty round of applause. Many of the teachers, and many of the students in the school, are here for the recital. On stage behind the curtain, Rumi and Akira are standing next to one another, both dressed in the girl's choir costume, and waiting for the curtain to rise. The announcer now says that this choir is the Second Class of the Sixth Grade. Rumi whispers to Akira---

" Uhhh~~I'm getting nervous! A-chan, aren't you nervous, too ? "

" Yeah, I am ! "

As the curtain begins to go up, one last thought races through Akira's mind---

" It was the best choice to wear the girl's costume, even though I am much more nervous about actually wearing this costume ! "

Akira then takes Rumi's hand into hers, so that both girls are now romantically holding hands.

At the last few seconds, Akira whispers to Rumi---

" I'll be okay, *with you by my side!* "

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(Click on Chapter 21 to be taken to the next chapter. Click on Omake (Extra) 20.5 to be taken to the Omake between Chapters 20 & 21.)