Bloom of Youth

**Bloom of Youth** is episode 52b of Edward and Eric. It premiered on Kids' WB on September 14, 2002.

## Synopsis

A newly acquired collection of labor-saving devices leaves Stanley atrophied, and they ultimately age him down into an infant.

## Cast

* Andrew Rannells as Edward and Oscar
* Edward Felker as Stanley
* Josh Peck as Eric
* Mike Pollock as Principal Walker
* Gary Sauls as Mr. Goodman and Constantinos
* Dan Green as Henry
* Wayne Grayson as Joey

Although Nurse Fracture doesn't appear, she is mentioned by Mr. Goodman during the ending.

## Trivia

* This episode was available on the An Onix-pected Adventure DVD, the Tripping Down Memory Lane VHS and DVD, and the Season 3 Volume 2 box set before it officially aired on television. Outside of the United States, it's available on the Shaggy Dog Story DVD instead of the former.
	+ In addition to the above releases, this episode is also available on The Best of Stanley VHS.
* This was the last Season 3 episode in terms of premiere order, and it was also the last 11-minute episode to premiere in general before the movie released in theaters.
	+ Because of this delay, this episode has the longest gap ever between production and airing time.
* Despite premiering in 2002 and originally being scheduled to have premiered in 2000, this episode was produced in 1999 according to the copyright date at the end of the credits.
* This episode premiered in Latin America on October 7, 2000. The German premiere date was nearly a week later, on October 13.
* This episode premiered as part of the Scoob-tacular Saturday event.
	+ During its premiere, this and Hunt for the Gaboon Viper were advertised as "lost episodes".
* Some TV guides list this as a Season 4 episode.
* When this episode finally premiered, it aired before Hunt for the Gaboon Viper instead of after it like usual.
* This was the only cel-animated episode to premiere long after the show's animation switched to the digital ink-and-paint method. In production order, this is the last 11-minute episode, and penultimate episode overall, to be animated in cels.
* When the series temporarily aired in early morning reruns on Cartoon Network from April 28 to August 20, 2020, this episode was ran twice (once paired up with Hunt for the Gaboon Viper, and again paired up with Prehistoric Eric), due to Everyone's Cup of Tea being skipped over due to mirroring the ongoing COVID-19 pandemic.
* Principal Walker does not know what a baby is and states he has never been a father before, despite having three children.
* This is the first instance where Buffalo Gals plays at the start of an episode, as opposed to playing during the ending as usual.
* Stanley breaks the fourth wall when he causes his remote-controlled door opener to make the camera transition to a later point in time.
* An Aesop: Although technology is incredibly useful, you shouldn't be overly reliant on it. In fact, relying on it too much may hinder some of your skills, and sometimes even your health.

## Transcript

(The episode opens with a shot of the school's front gates, where Stanley is heard laughing. The camera zooms in, and it fades to the front of the boys' dorm, where it's revealed that Stanley is repeatedly opening and closing the front door with the click of a remote)

(Edward pops out of nowhere and joins in on the laughing)

**Edward:** What are we laughing at, Stanley?

**Stanley:** (chuckles) It's this thing!

(He shows him the remote)

**Stanley:** My remote-controlled door opener! I spent my allowance on it.

**Edward:** Wow, that's great!

(Beat)

**Edward:** (nonchalantly) I don't get it.

**Stanley:** Well, it's quite simple; with this device, I can open any door in the school. Watch and learn.

(He clicks the remote and opens the school building's front door)

**Stanley:** The school building,

(Then, he opens the door to Walker's office)

**Stanley:** Principal Walker's office,

(And finally, a restroom stall)

**Stanley:** and the restroom stalls.

**Henry:** (from a stall as a "plop" is heard) HEY! I'M BAKING A LOAF IN HERE!

(Cut back to Edward and Stanley)

**Edward:** Wow, Stanley, that sounds great!

**Eric:** (walks in) Stanley rocks!

**Stanley:** No, it's not just great. (raises the remote in the air) With this device, I am outstanding and sensational!

(He pushes the button, which causes the camera to transition to later that afternoon. A knock on Stanley's door is heard)

**Stanley:** I'll get it. (presses the button again)

**Constantinos:** (carrying a metallic box) Package for Stanley Breault.

(He grunts and sweats as he carries the box over to Stanley. He sets it down next to him)

**Constantinos:** Don't bother tipping me, I don't accept tips.

**Stanley:** Who said I was going to tip you?

**Constantinos:** (walks away; under his breath) Cheapskate.

(The brothers happened to have been passing by. They enter the room)

**Edward:** Mind if we help you open that, Stanley?

**Stanley:** That won't be necessary!

(Within the click of a button, the box opens up, revealing loads of gadgets)

**Edward:** Whoa! What are all of these contraptions?

**Stanley:** The latest labor-saving devices on the market! Like this turbo-charged vacuum.

(Stanley activates it on full power, and he laughs as it sucks up the entire scene, leaving the universe in a white void. The vacuum spits it back out, and then it sucks the brothers in before spitting them back out as well)

**Edward:** That might push the meaning of "labor-saving" a little too much...

**Eric:** (picks up a metal bar that has a pair of underwear attached to it) Say, what's this? Looks like my type of gadget.

**Stanley:** Careful with that! (takes it from Eric) This is called the No-Hands Underwear Changer. You just put it in the back of your pants, (does so) and then... (takes it out) ta-da!

(We see that the underwear has vanished)

**Stanley:** Now you'll have clean skimmies!

**Eric:** (raises an eyebrow) Wait, what happens to your old underwear?

**Stanley:** Eric, that's a dumb question with an easy answer. It's something called science.

**Edward:** Well, I'm a scientist, and not even I can explain *that*.

(Suddenly, Eric spits at Stanley, and Stanley yelps)

**Stanley:** Eric!

(Eric is wearing something on his mouth that looks like a pacifier. He continues spitting at him)

**Edward:** And what's THAT?

**Stanley:** That's my mechanical spitting machine, so PLEASE hand it over, Eric!

(Eric doesn't stop)

**Stanley:** Ok, you're forcing me to come over there!

(Stanley hops on a mechanical recliner, and it slowly advances towards Eric, which takes 30 seconds)

(After that, he swipes it from Eric so hard that Eric's mouth gets ripped off)

**Eric:** Ouch! Spit-take!

**Edward:** Stanley, I think perhaps you're taking these labor-saving devices a little too far.

**Stanley:** (takes out a giant live-action ear) WHAAAAAAAAAT?

(Presumably the next day, the brothers are in the common room, sitting on the couch)

**Edward:** I'm really getting worried about Stanley and his labor-saving devices.

**Eric:** I don't think he's taking them far if he's still upstairs, close to us.

**Stanley:** (from his room) I heard you with my eavesdropping device!

(The brothers' eyes widen, and the camera immediately cuts to them entering Stanley's room again)

**Stanley:** And you'll be happy to know that I have given up all of my machines...

(The camera pans out to reveal him laying on a robotic bed)

**Stanley:** ...for this Slacker 5000 Robo-Bed! It does everything for me! Just watch. (presses a green button)

(Three robotic arms emerge from the bed's sides. Each of them respectively comb Stanley's hair, massage his shoulders, and brush his teeth)

**Stanley:** It combs my hair, gives me massages, brushes my teeth, (a fourth robotic arm comes out) and it can even adjust your school uniform!

(The arm removes Edward's tie from his school uniform, and it ties it properly before putting it back on. Then, it removes Eric's suit and starts ironing it)

**Stanley:** But the most important part is how it has the upgraded underwear changer, of course. Comes with a built-in toilet as well!

**Edward:** That's good and all, but how about going out for some fresh air?

**Stanley:** No need! (grabs a hose, and it gently shoots out air) I can receive some fresh air through this hose!

**Edward:** But going out and being social is part of the boarding school experience. You shouldn't try to emulate that with technology.

**Stanley:** Don't worry, Edward, don't worry. You're such a worrisome chap, but you won't be for any longer when you feast your eyes on this!

(Stanley presses the blue button, and the bed takes off like a high-speed vehicle. It crashes through the wall in the process)

**Stanley:** (from a distance) THIS BABY'S ON WHEELS!!!!!

(The brothers wave)

**Both:** (sadly) Beep beep.

(Stanley laughs as he takes everything from the cafeteria's line, but then he crashes into a table)

**Joey:** (offscreen) HEY!

(The camera pans over to reveal that Stanley has caused himself to spill both his and Joey's foods)

**Joey:** Ten items or less, pal!

**Stanley:** Whoops.

(Camera cuts to Aaron and Corey running laps at the football field, and they're heavily panting. Suddenly, they hear the bed coming for them, and they dodge it at the last minute. The bed zooms through so fast that it leaves a trail of fire behind)

(The brothers are swimming in the Gym's pool)

**Edward:** Water's nice today, isn't it, Eric?

**Stanley:** (zooms through in the bed) IT'S PERFECT!

(Water gets all over the camera, and once it clears, it shows the brothers returning to the boys' dorm)

**Edward:** Swimming is a pretty great workout.

**Eric:** Yup, it's been the best for as long as I remember.

(They walk in)

**Eric:** Or, in other words, five seconds.

**Stanley:** (from his room) Edward! Eric! Thank goodness you guys are here. Could you help me out?

(They walk in)

**Stanley:** Would you be so kind to remove my blanket? It's hot.

**Edward:** (sarcastically) Why don't you just push one of your buttons?

**Stanley:** I would have, but for some reason, I can't seem to reach for them.

**Edward:** Alright, whatever. (removes the blanket)

(Suddenly, the camera focuses on a closeup of Stanley's limbs, each of which have shrunken)

**Edward:** (gasps) STANLEY! Your arms! Your legs! They've shrunk from disuse!

**Eric:** Oh no! Wet noodles!

**Stanley:** Eh, it's no big deal. I'm sure I just need to do some stretching exercises. Would you mind pressing the red button?

(Edward does so, and four robotic arms pop out. They grab Stanley's limbs)

**Stanley:** Now, observe how a contemporary student stretches in modern style!

(The robotic arms stretch his limbs)

**Stanley:** Alright! That should do!

(They let go, but his limbs fall over and shrink again)

**Stanley:** Crud. That's never happened before. Uhh, don't worry, I'll think of something.

(He stares at the ceiling for a few seconds)

**Eric:** Well?

(Stanley thinks harder, and he grunts as he shuts his eyes)

**Stanley:** I'm trying to think, but nothing is happening! (then, he gets an idea) Oh! I have a brilliant idea!

**Edward:** Let me guess, you want one of us to push another button?

**Stanley:** Yup! One of you, please push the blue button.

(Eric does so, and a helmet with blinking light bulbs is applied to Stanley's head)

**Stanley:** There we go! Thank you! Now I'm sure to get some real solutions with this thinking cap.

(The brothers look at each other before looking back at Stanley)

**Edward:** Alright then, Stanley. While you're busy with that, Eric and I are gonna do some *real* thinking with our *own* minds.

**Stanley:** Ok, party pooper, catch you later! Have fun doing it the hard way!

(The brothers leave, and the camera transitions to later that afternoon. They enter Stanley's room once more)

**Edward:** Hey Stanley, I apologize if we're interrupting, but Eric and I have been thinking, and-

(Suddenly, they realize Stanley is nowhere to be found)

**Edward:** Stanley?

**Eric:** Where'd he go?

(His clothes are seen on the bed, near the helmet)

**Edward:** His clothes are still here, and so is that "thinking cap"...

(Edward lifts up the helmet, revealing a baby Stanley)

**Stanley:** (coos)

(The brothers scream bloody murder at the sight of this)

**Both:** Stanley is a baby!

**Edward:** His brain and muscles were so dormant that he regressed into a baby! Wait, where is the manual for this contraption? (runs off) There's gotta be something we can do!

**Eric:** (covering his nose) Like put a diaper on him?

**Edward:** (reading a manual) Wait, here it is. "If symptoms from continuous use invoke regression into an infant, discontinue use of Slacker 5000 Robo-Bed immediately. User should revert to normal within twenty-four hours." (puts it down) So all we have to do is wait.

**Eric:** But what if he does the...you know...the... (blows a raspberry)

(At that moment, Stanley defecates himself)

**Edward:** Alright, even though I've invented time travel, discovered the cure for the common cold, and created an artificial, microscopic multiverse, I have no idea how to take care of a baby.

**Eric:** Yeah. Dad must be braver than the Marines for taking care of us when we were younger.

**Edward:** We need to get Stanley to a responsible adult until this wears off, now that you mention it.

**Eric:** (ponders) Hmm...responsible adult...who do we know? (gasps in excitement once he gets an idea)

(The camera cuts to Edward knocking on the door to Walker's office)

**Principal Walker:** (opens it) What?! Are you Chinese food delivery?!

**Edward:** Uh, hi, Principal Walker. No, we bring you something better. A bundle of joy that will fill your life with love and happiness.

(Beat)

**Principal Walker:** If it's not Chinese food, I don't want it. (slams the door shut, causing Stanley to cry)

**Edward:** I think we need a more conventional approach.

(The camera cuts to Oscar knocking on the door)

**Principal Walker:** D'oh, what is it now?!

**Oscar:** (holding Stanley's blanket with his beak similarly to a stork; hoots)

**Principal Walker:** Oh. Thanks. (takes Stanley and closes the door)

(The brothers give each other a thumbs-up, and the camera cuts to Walker's office. Walker is reading the newspaper, and Stanley is on a table, crying)

**Mr. Goodman:** Sir, I think I hear a-

**Stanley:** (sobs)

**Mr. Goodman:** (approaches him) What is this?

**Principal Walker:** (flips through the newspaper) Oh, it's a baby. They delivered it earlier.

**Mr. Goodman:** Sir, who delivered it?

**Principal Walker:** I don't know! I was waiting for Chinese food!

**Mr. Goodman:** (carries Stanley) Well, who does it belong to?

**Principal Walker:** They delivered it to *me*, Goodman! Doesn't that make *me* the owner of this- uhh, what is this thing again?

**Mr. Goodman:** A baby.

**Principal Walker:** Riiiiiight. First, we have to figure out exactly what a baby is.

**Mr. Goodman:** Sir, a baby is like a little person.

(Beat; Walker is clueless)

**Mr. Goodman:** Who will one day grow up to be a big person.

**Principal Walker:** (astonished) Mother of science, what will they think of next?

**Mr. Goodman:** (hands Stanley over to him) Here, watch over him until I can find out where he came from.

**Principal Walker:** (stutters out of anxiety) What do you mean?! What do I do?!

**Mr. Goodman:** Well, act kinda like his daddy until I get back.

(Walker smiles)

**Mr. Goodman:** (walks away; under his breath) Which, for the baby's sake, will be shortly.

**Principal Walker:** His, *daddy?* (tears up) I've never been a daddy before! (closes his eyes as Stanley smiles) Yes! I'm your daddy!

**Stanley:** (babbles and reaches for Walker's nostrils)

**Principal Walker:** Yes I am! Gootchie-gootch-

(Suddenly, Stanley tugs on one of Walker's nose hairs, causing Walker to scream bloody murder. Stanley spins around while hanging onto it)

**Principal Walker:** (sheds a few tears out of pure agony) Oh, look at you, hangin' on in there like a...little nose hair hanger! (chuckles and heads over to his bedroom's drawer) Ok, little thing, Daddy wants his nose back. (snips it apart with a pair of scissors) There we go.

**Stanley:** (babbles in confusion before crying at the top of his lungs)

**Principal Walker:** Eh, no no! Don't cry! Uh, what, are you hungry?

(Stanley cries louder, and Walker rushes off. Then, he sprints back in, holding a gigantic sub sandwich)

**Principal Walker:** Here you go! Yum yum!

(Stanley continues crying)

**Principal Walker:** (sets it down) It's Goodman's lunch! He won't mind, really! Nonononono!

(Stanley goes back to crying)

**Principal Walker:** Oh! What is it now? (quickly eats the sandwich and carries Stanley) Uhh...rock-a-bye baby, the cradle falls, and...dah!

(Stanley imagines himself in a cradle, falling down a tree. This causes him to cry even louder)

**Principal Walker:** Uh, you like funny faces?

(Walker makes weird noises as he makes three different exaggerated facial expressions. Stanley is still crying)

**Principal Walker:** Uhh, ok, maybe it's not so funny, just like primetime TV!

(The camera cuts to live-action footage of a neon sign at a TV studio reading "LAUGH", and an audience laughs hard at Walker's line)

**Principal Walker:** (sets Stanley down on his office's desk) Alright, alright, ***WAIT HERE!!!!!!!*** (calmly) I mean, wait here! Daddy needs some help. (leaves)

(Suddenly, Stanley poofs into a toddler, and Walker returns, flipping through a book)

**Principal Walker:** Ok, I found a book that- (sees that Stanley has grown, and an alarm noise plays) ***HOLY BEANSTALK!!!!!! YOU'RE GROWING!!!!!*** (frantically flips through the book) Are you supposed to be sitting up already? I mean-

**Stanley:** Stu...pid...Walker...

**Principal Walker:** (happily) "Stupid Walker"! Your first words! You said your first words! (dashes away) Wait, let me get my camera!

(Once Walker leaves, Stanley grows into a little kid. He is now wearing a baseball cap, a striped shirt, and cargo shorts)

**Principal Walker:** (returns with a camera) Found it! I think there's still some film in he- ***WHAT THE?!!? WHOA, WHAT?!!?*** You've already taken your first step!

(A baseball and a baseball glove poofs onto Stanley's hands)

**Principal Walker:** What have I done?! I've been so preoccupied I'm missing your whole childhood!

**Stanley:** Wanna play Catch?

**Principal Walker:** Ehh, I dunno, I'm a little busy.

(Then, Stanley grows into an older kid. He is wearing a black hoodie and playing on a handheld game system)

**Stanley:** Can I watch TV? Can I have some money?

**Principal Walker:** Now wait a minute, young man!

**Stanley:** (crosses his arms) I *hate* you!

**Principal Walker:** (shocked) What?! (Stanley hops off the desk) Son, wait!

(Stanley marches into Walker's bathroom. Walker crawls after him, but Stanley slams the door)

**Principal Walker:** Son, wait! (tears up) I'm sorry! Son! SON!!!! (starts crying) I've been a poor excuse for a father! (sobs hysterically as a beam of light emerges from the bathroom door before opening) Cats in the cradle! (gasps for air) ***CATS IN THE CRADLE!!!!!!!!!***

(A dazed Stanley walks out, and he is now back to normal)

**Stanley:** (slaps the side of his head) Now, *that* was weird.

**Principal Walker:** (a tear rolls down his cheek) Son?

**Stanley:** I, think I'm, going now.

**Principal Walker:** (grabs him by the shoulders) Going?! But where?! (shivers)

**Stanley:** Back to school and normal living. (leaves) I am through with gadgets! (passes by Mr. Goodman) Hi, Mr. Goodman.

**Mr. Goodman:** Hi, Stanley.

**Principal Walker:** B-b-b-b-b-but...

**Mr. Goodman:** Well, I think I found a place to- (looks around) Sir, where's the baby?

**Principal Walker:** All grown up, Goodman. (sniffles) He left for school! (gestures his hand similarly to a bird) Like a bird, Goodman, leaving the nest, and-

(Someone knocks on the door)

**Principal Walker:** (immediately stops crying) Oh, finally, my Chinese food! Sheesh! (opens the door, only to see a box filled with Stanley's devices) What is *this?* (sighs) Great. Somebody left a box of junk near my office.

**Mr. Goodman:** (grabs the box's note) Actually, there's a note. "Thanks for a wonderful childhood."

**Principal Walker:** (in awe) My son?

**Mr. Goodman:** He left you a box of labor-saving gadgets. (takes out the No-Hands Underwear Changer) Huh, here's an automatic underwear changer.

**Principal Walker:** REALLY?! OOH, LET ME TRY! GIMMEGIMMEGIMME! (swipes it)

**Mr. Goodman:** Sir, I think you need to be carefu-

**Principal Walker:** (changes his underwear with it) WHOA! Hm, what else is here? (digs through the box) Ooh, a nose picker!

(Edward, Eric and Stanley are seen watching this unfold)

**Mr. Goodman:** Sir, I don't think this is a good idea.

(Cut to the trio)

**Edward:** Well, it's great to have ya back, Stanley!

**Stanley:** I think I'll be changing my own underwear from now on!

(They walk out of the office)

**Stanley:** Um, could I borrow yours in the meantime?

**Edward:** Uhh, sure, I guess.

(Walker and Mr. Goodman leave the office as well, and we see that Walker has now aged down to an infant. He is in a cradle)

**Principal Walker:** (babbles profusely and blows a raspberry)

**Mr. Goodman:** (sighs) Yes, sir. We'll get you to Nurse Fracture *right* away.

(Iris out)

("The End" screen)

(Episode ends)