The Purple Serum

The Purple Serum is the fourth chapter in the Wombles Four.

Doctor Pincher was still purple, but a darker shade now, and still unconscious too.  Suddenly Mrs Peel came in.  She stared at him and took the vices off.  He finally woke up.  “Doctor Pincher, how could you let yourself get captured like that?” asked Mrs Peel Dr Pincher just groaned.  “Who captured you then?  At least tell me that!”  said Mrs Peel.  “The Steeds.” Replied Dr Pincher, in between gasps.  “Which Steed?”  “Kind of both but it was mostly Cathy.”  “Oh. Well she would, wouldn’t she? Come on, let’s get back to the base.” And they walked off.

Later they arrived at a train station.  They got on a train all the way to Scotland.

When they arrived, they got off the train and into a building with a sign that said, “Not The Secret Head Quarters Of A Secret Organisation Run By Mrs Emma Peel (NTSHQOASORBMEP)”.  Obviously it actually was.  The HQ of SCAR, to be precise.  The inside was a creepy room full of coffins of people that SCAR had killed.  They went into another room where there was a big board on the wall.  It was a list of the top priority to kill people.  At the top was Cathy Steed.  Mrs Peel got a pen and wrote two more names onto it.  Thomas Steed and Lucy Steed.  Above them were the current kings and queens, who hadn’t been in the explosion at the court, only the other policemen had.  “With them dead, I can take over London, and then John will just have to marry me, won’t he?” laughed Mrs Peel.

Mr Class opened the door of his van.  There was quite a mess in the cave.  The other nineteen window cleaners got out of their vans.  The ten vans appeared when the cloaking devices were disabled.  They were a little scratched but not seriously damaged.  Mr Class clicked his fingers and the Milkman drove up to the shattered door.  The window cleaners and the Milkman put on ear defenders.  The Milkman pressed a button on his milk float and a high-pitched sound echoed through the cave.  The roof of the cave started to crumble.

Wombat, Womble Wonder and Why Does My Name Keep Changing Bulgaria started to shake.  “What is going on?” asked Wombat.  “At a guess I would say a supersonic sound beam has fired into the Wombatcave” replied Suddenly Realising We Are In Danger Bulgaria. They were just about to run out of Womble Manor when the floor gave way.  Down they all fell into a vast cloud of fine dust.  The vans and the milk float had already left.  Mr Class, his window cleaners and the Milkman watched with satisfaction as Womble Manor disappeared in huge dust cloud in the distance.

There was only a huge crater left where the former window cleaning company, Cafeeee, Eat At Joe’s and Womble Manor building had been.  Down in the crater the three wombles emerged from the Wombatshield. The black bouncy ball opened up and out came Womble Wonder, Wombat and That Was a Close One Bulgaria.

Suddenly there was a knock on the door of NTSHQOASORBMEP.  “Come in” said Mrs Peel.  Yuma Von Vomble came in.  “Ah Yuma” said Mrs Peel.  “Did you get the babies?”  “No, they escaped.”  “WHAT?!?!” “I’m sorry but they have all the instincts of their parents at not even a year old.  Could you possibly explain that to me?”  “Yes, I believe I can.  The doctors a while back were working on a drug that gives people the intelligence of a fully-trained spy.  It was stolen though, and this probably means that John and Cathy stole it to feed to their babies.  But don’t worry, you have to keep having it everyday, and eventually they’ll run out. Now get to work!”  “Yes boss” replied Yuma.  “I’ll kill Mother immediately.  Mind you, vhy do you vant him dead?”  “Because if he stays alive, he’ll most likely save Cathy from me, and kill Steed before I can marry him.”  “Er vhat?”  “Cathy used to be Mother’s wife you see.  And by the way, why aren’t you speaking German?”  “So that you can understand me better.  Goodbye Mrs Peel” he saluted and left.

Lucy was in the lab at Steed Manor with racks of test tubes and chemicals.  “Have you got it yet?” asked Thomas from another workbench at the lab. “Not yet but I am close” she answered.  “I have the formula now.” Thomas said handing a sheet of paper to Lucy.  “Is this the only copy?” she asked.  “No I have a copy in the safe at the Dairy, another in the fire safe in the basement and it is also backed up in the cloud” he answered. “The cloud!  What if somebody else gets it from their PC?”  “They won’t have the encryption key, relax” Thomas tried to assure Lucy.

Lucy wasn’t listening. She was leaping up and down shouting “woo hoo”.  “Try this brother!” she said handing Thomas a vial of purple liquid.  “You’re done with it?” he asked.  “Yep!” she answered smugly.  “OK then, down the hatch!” said Thomas and drank it down.  Lucy stared opened mouthed at the result.  “What?” asked Thomas.  Lucy held up a mirror.  “Nice picture of Dad but can I have a mirror?” he asked.  “It is a mirror” replied Lucy looking serious.  “Oh!” was all Thomas could reply.

Steed and Cathy arrived. “Lucy!  We escaped!  Where is your brother and why have you got a robot clone of me?” asked Steed.  “Hello Dad” said the clone.  “Thomas?” asked Cathy.  “Yes it’s me!” replied Thomas.  Just then Cathy saw Lucy about to drink something purple.  “No!” she shouted but it was too late.  Cathy looked at Lucy.  It was like a mirror!

“Well I’ll ask the window cleaners to buy you some new clothes” announced Steed.  “I suppose I’ll give full combat training” added Cathy. “But hang on though won’t everyone think you’re us?”  Thomas drank something green.  He turned back to look like himself.  Lucy drank it too and she looked like herself again.  “Phew” said Cathy.

Mrs Peel was talking to Dr Diablo.  “Won’t the wombles stop us Mrs Peel?”  “Wombles! Don’t worry about them!  I’ll simply steal the jewel and wipe them off the face of the earth!”  “But won’t the wombles keep you away from it?”  “Don’t be ridiculous!  First of all I’m immortal and second of all I have some of the power of the Existence Jewel!” “But what about Cathy?  She has some of the power of the Protection Jewel!” “We’re going to kill her remember? She is top priority to kill in fact!” “But what if we fail again?” “Fail?!?!  Are you calling me stupid?  Mrs Peel never fails!”  “Y-y-yes boss.”  And Dr Diablo walked out.

Mrs Peel called him back immediately.  “Have you forgotten anything?” she asked Dr Diablo.  “I don’t think so” replied Dr Diablo.  “Idiot!  Your clothes man!  You are only wearing pants!” shouted Mrs Peel.  “Oh!  I forgot about that!” said Dr Diablo looking embarrassed.  “Nice pants though” added Mrs Peel.  “Thank you boss!” said Dr Diablo on his to way to get dressed.

Dr Pincher was in the changing room.  “You don’t look well” said Dr Diablo.  “You’re shaped like a peanut and purple” he added.  “Nice pants!” replied Dr Pincher.  Dr Diablo put on what he could find quickly.  He headed out with Dr Pincher wearing a top hat, purple dungarees and matching shoes which were in fact Mrs Peel’s.  “Mrs Peel!” asked Dr Pincher.  “Yes!” shouted Mrs Peel in an irritated fashion.  “Where are the car keys?” asked Dr Diablo.  “My car was destroyed by those stupid window cleaners!”  The doctors rushed out and caught a bus instead before Mrs Peel killed them.

Steed and Cathy were just getting used to Thomas and Lucy being adults (they drank more purple serum). Lucy was wondering something herself. “Mum, why are you dressed as a nurse?” Suddenly Steed realised the same thing. “Yes, why are you?” he added.  “To rescue you John!  I just haven’t changed yet!” she replied and promptly changed into leather trousers, top, jacket and boots.  Lucy was wearing a green trouser suit.  Cathy looked angrily at her daughter.  “Why are angry Mum?” asked Lucy.  “Get changed!  You’re doing a Mrs Peel with that outfit!”  Lucy was relieved when Mr Class brought bundles of posh clothes.

Lucy chose a white skirt suit in Cathy Gale style.  Thomas chose a tweed suit with matching bowler hat, umbrella and shoes.  Steed handed them both green serum for emergencies in case they needed to go down into a small space.  Cathy handed them emergency pink serum.   “What does it do?” asked Thomas.  “I don’t know” replied Cathy.  “Try it on some enemies if you can” suggested Steed.

Thomas and Lucy headed out to the womble burrow in the light green Bentley with question marks. “Hello” they said to Wellington. “Hello Steed” replied Wellington “I should really arrest you and Cathy for murder but most of the police are dead”. Thomas about to tell Wellington he wasn’t John Steed but Lucy gave a kick.  He got the hint.  Lucy addressed Wellington now.  “We are taking charge of the wombles!  Get out of this office!” she shouted.  Thomas changed the sign on the door to read LATNSACO (Lucy And Thomas’s Not Steed And Cathy’s Office).

Suddenly Lucy and Thomas decided that they didn’t want everyone to think they were their parents so drank the green serum and became babies again.  There was a knock at the door.  “Yes?” asked Lucy.  “It’s me Wellington!  Can I come in?”  Lucy quickly drank purple serum and gave some to Thomas.  “Come in” said Thomas.  Wellington looked a bit shifty.  “Sorry but I’m afraid I made the womblets gigantic with my shrink upside down.” “Don’t worry” said Thomas.  “It’s just temporary right?” asked Lucy.  “Er no actually.  I kind of adjusted the shrink ray to be permanent!” admitted Welllington.

Thomas and Lucy had a look and found that the burrow had been torn open with the jewel exposed. “Quick!” shouted Lucy and they dashed to grab it.  Only just in time as Mrs Peel was running towards the burrow.  They leapt into the Bentley and raced away with the jewel. Thomas looked it the wing mirror and saw a weird glow and Mrs Peel smiling.  “Quick!  We have to take it back!  The wombles are dying!” he shouted.   They raced back and replaced the jewel.

Mrs Peel was just about to kill Lucy with her machete (thinking it was Cathy) when a giant womblet trod on her.  “We have to rebuild the burrow!  Fast!” said Lucy.  Thomas called Mr Class.  The window cleaners arrived with a big load of glass panels and milk churns.  They repaired the burrow with the milk churns as the roof and glass for the walls and doors.  At the same time Thomas and Lucy got the womblets to follow them through London.

Lucy called her parents. “Emergency!  The womblets are gigantic!  Wellington has made the shrink ray permanent!” she shouted.  “Try the pink serum” suggested Steed.   They tried it on one.  The womblet didn’t shrink it started floating away!  “Oh well” said Lucy and they did the same with all of them.

The womblets kept on floating up into space until they reached Venus.  A giant purple octopus shot out its tentacles and grabbed them.

Meanwhile Mrs Peel was digging herself out of Wimbledon Common.  She was livid at being squashed by a giant womblet!