A Scarf for Bart

**A Scarf for Bart** is the first episode of the third season of RS Mr. Conductor the Conductor and Friends, and the fifty-third episode overall. It is a parody of the Thomas and Friends episode, A Scarf for Percy.

## Cast

* RS Mr. Conductor (from Shining Time Station) as Thomas
* Homer (from The Simpsons) as Henry
* Schemer (from Shining Time Station) as James
* Bart (from The Simpsons) as Percy
* Mayor Adam West (from Family Guy) as Sir Topham Hatt
* Carol Pewterschmidt (from Family Guy) as Lady Hatt (*does not speak*)
* Eustace (from Courage the Cowardly Dog) as Jeremiah Jobling (*cameo*)
* Orson (from Garfield/US Acres) as Farmer Trotter (*cameo*)
* Everyone else as Themselves

## Transcript

Narrator: "It was a cold winter's morning in TV Land. The wind was bitter and the ground hard with frost. RS Mr. Conductor and Bart were cold and cross."

RS Mr. Conductor: "All I want is a warm body."

Narrator: "Huffed RS Mr. Conductor."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Firelighter knows that. He's late."

Bart: "He's not late."

Narrator: "Replied Bart."

Bart: "This cold weather woke us up early."

Narrator: "Gusts of wind swirled round the house, tossing flakes of snow towards RS Mr. Conductor. Then they swooshed around Bart too."

Bart: "Why don't we talk about something else?"

Narrator: "Shivered Bart."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Yes, like how silly we'll look when you heads turn into icicles."

Bart: "That's not funny. Maybe we'll stop feeling cold if we talk about warm things, like sunshine and steam."

RS Mr. Conductor: "And firelighters."

Narrator: "Muttered RS Mr. Conductor."

Bart: "Scarves!"

Narrator: "Continued Bart."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Scarves."

Narrator: "Laughed RS Mr. Conductor."

RS Mr. Conductor: "That's what you need, Bart. A woolly scarf round your neck."

Narrator: "RS Mr. Conductor was only teasing. But Bart thought happily about scarves until the firelighter came.

Mayor Adam West was enjoying hot porridge for breakfast. He was looking forward to taking important visitors on a tour of the land and had pressed his special trousers."

Mayor Adam West: "I shall put them in my trunk and change into them just before the photographs are taken."

Narrator: "He said to Carol. Then he set off to catch his ride.

Bart was now working hard. His body was warm, and he had plenty of strength, but he still thought about scarves. He saw them everywhere he went."

Bart: "My neck's cold, my neck's cold."

Narrator: "He puffed."

Bart: "I want a scarf, I want a scarf."

Homer: "Rubbish, Bart."

Narrator: "Said Homer."

Homer: "TV Characters don't wear scarves."

Bart: "TV Characters with proper necks do."

Narrator: "Replied Bart."

Bart: "Your neck is too big."

Narrator: "Before Homer could answer, Bart puffed away. Homer snorted. He was looking forward to taking the special visitors.

It was time for the photographs. Everyone was excited. Mayor West was waiting on the platform for his trousers. They were in a trunk amongst a big load of baggage. The porters were taking the baggage trolley across the line. They were walking backwards to see that nothing fell off.

Bart was still being cheeky. His driver always shut off steam just outside the station. Bart wanted to surprise the flowers by coming in as quietly as he could.

But the porters didn't here him either.

Boxes and bags burst everywhere."

Bart: "Oh!"

Narrator: "Groaned Bart.

Sticky streams of jam trickled down Bart's face. A hat fell on his foot. Worst of all, a pair of trousers coiled lovingly round his neck.

Everyone was a very angry. Mayor West seized the top hat."

Mayor Adam West: "Mine!"

Narrator: "He said."

Mayor Adam West: "Bart, look at this!"

Bart: "Yes sir. I am sir."

Mayor Adam West: "My best trousers too!"

Bart: "Yes sir. Please sir."

Mayor Adam West: "We must pay the passengers for their spoiled clothes, and my trousers are ruined. I hope this will teach you not to play tricks with the flowers."

Narrator: "Bart went off to the yard. He felt very silly. On the way, he met Schemer."

Schemer: "Hello, Bart. So you found a scarf, eh? But legs go in trousers, not necks!"

Narrator: "And he puffed off to tell Homer the news.

That evening, RS Mr. Conductor and Bart were resting in the house. Bart's driver had taken away the trousers and given Bart a good rubdown."

RS Mr. Conductor: "Firelighter's promised to come early tomorrow."

Narrator "Said RS Mr. Conductor. Homer arrived. He'd enjoyed taking the visitors around and now he felt sorry for Bart too."

Homer: "Driver says the weather will be warmer tomorrow. You won't need a scarf, Bart."

Bart: "Certainly not."

Narrator: "Replied Bart."

Bart: "TV Characters don't need scarves. TV Characters need warm bodies. Everyone knows that!"