John

*For information on this character in the cartoon, see John (cartoon).*

 — Narration in "John"

* Heitz
* McCauley
* Schick
* Brinckloe
* Hockerman

**John** is a character in the *Wayside School* books. He is one of the many students in Mrs. Jewls's class. He is a smart student who could only read words written upside down, until he got his brain flipped. He is best friends with Joe, and regularly teases Dana.

## Appearance

In "John," it is described that John has a round head with light brown hair. According to "Strange Facts," his hair is shorter than Joe's and Dana's, but equally as thick. Aside from this, however, little is known about what John looks like.

## Personality

John is one of the smartest kids in Mrs. Jewls's class. In "John," he is stated to be in the class's high-level reading group, and he is frequently shown to give correct answers to questions he is asked in class. He wins Mrs. Jewls's spelling bee in "A Package for Mrs. Jewls," and gets third place in the spelling bee held in "The Ultimate Test, Day One." In "Why the Children Decided They Had to Get Rid of Mrs. Drazil," he correctly answers Mrs. Drazil's math problem about how many cookies each student can get, and in "A Million," he says that a million is 999,999 plus one, an answer Joe and Dana agree is smart. Other characters are seen trusting John to help them with certain problems, as Joe cheats off him in "Mrs. Gorf," and Mrs. Jewls has him help count Eric Bacon's nail clippings in "Eric, Eric, and *What's-His-Name?*"

John is also seen however, to frequently tease Dana, a trait first revealed during "A Giggle Box, a Leaky Faucet, and a Foghorn," where he is seen teasing her about her over-emotional nature during the class's story time, and where it's revealed he frequently chases her on the playground, singing the songs that make her cry. John jokingly refuses Dana a pen in "Poetry," and further teases her in "Stuck," though in this case, Dana manages to get back at him, causing him to feel like a big doofus. John's attitude seems to suggest that he gives up easily when things don't quite go his way, as in "John," he repeatedly asserts that he will never be able to stand on his head when Mrs. Jewls asks him to, and in "Santa Claus," he gives up hope on Christmas after Louis comes in dressed as Santa, something he thinks further proves that Kathy is right about Santa not being real.

## Relationships

### Joe

    In the books, Joe is stated to be John's best friend. The two are first seen interacting in "Joe," when John is upset when Joe misses a kickball match, but they aren't confirmed to be friends until "John," where Joe tries to help John stand on his head by standing on his head whenever he falls over. For the rest of the series, they are seen interacting frequently, in "A Giggle Box, a Leaky Faucet, and a Foghorn," Joe jokes with John when he's making fun of Dana, and later in "Another Story About Potatoes," they eat potato salad together at lunch, particularly when the salad morphs into Mrs. Gorf. John and Joe are excited to regroup in "Explanation," though by "Stupid," Miss Wendy Nogard leads to them breaking off their friendship, though it eventually mends, likely after the events of "The Little Stranger," as Joe compliments John's intelligence in "A Million," and the two join together once again to tease Dana in "Stuck." As is seen in "The Unbreakables," the Cloud of Doom puts pressure on their friendship, though they remain friends afterwards, holding hands as they walk down the stairs in "Kachooga Boop" and seemingly eating lunch together in "Rainbow."

### Dana

John frequently is seen teasing Dana in the books, as first seen in "A Giggle Box, a Leaky Faucet, and a Foghorn," when John teases her whenever she laughs or cries too loud when reading a book. Dana worries at the end of the chapter that she might actually like John when she realizes she actually likes the books she's reading, but it seems their relationship is predominantly negative, as later in "Poetry," he teases her about lending her his pen, and she calls him a "ratfink" in response. In "Valooosh," the two are seen dancing together, but chances are this interaction isn't positive, as they use this as an opportunity to trip each other to the ground. That being said, in "Stuck," it is revealed that Dana likes when John teases her, and that she feels bad when her Doofus Face makes John feel upset. Whether John feels the same way in return, however is unknown, though Dana does hold one of his hands when walking down the stairs in "Kachooga Boop."

## Appearances

For a list of every chapter John is seen in, see here.

## Trivia

* In the books, he was the second student transformed into an apple by Mrs. Gorf. The first was Joe.
* John dislikes eggs.

### Other designs

Peter Allen design (British edition, 2004)John as he appears in the cartoon. (2005)Hillar Mets design (Estonian edition, 2008)Satoshi Kitamura design (Japanese edition, 2010)Ramona Bruno design (Italian edition, 2021)
## References

1. ↑ "Spelling"