Episode 75: Hipster Hunter

**Video:**
1:00:02

**Video:**
hipster hunter.mp4

https://globehell.libsyn.com/

## Episode Summary

The worlds most peaceful days are when we all have a common enemy  like in WW2. These days there are so many enemies, so its hard to have a  single common one, which makes me sad panda :(. But what if we created a  new common enemy to search and destroy? Would that make me feel better?  To take someones life?

## Idea Details

* Idea: Hipster Hunter
* Creator of idea: Josiah
* Purpose of idea: People hate them! People hate uh hipsters. And they -- and I think it's our common -- I found our common enemy! (Drew: "Well I think one of the other common things you could probably find all of these --") Well maybe you should lis-- uh listen. (Drew: "No. One of the other common things you could probably find with these videos that you've shown is probably that they're from five or six years ago.") Well, I don't think that's really -- (Drew: "When, you know, hipsters were more part of the zeitgeist, and not, you know --") Yeah, well, that's -- (Drew: "-- as they, you know, they've really not --") So you're saying you liked these videos before they were cool. Let's keep a tally of that. See, I mean, everyone just ha-- um it's becoming a real -- and the -- and it's less about the -- I think I agree that maybe we're -- they're not hurting anyone all the time. Sometimes they're just posting uh crange. Is that -- (Drew: "Crange.") They're posting crange on main. (Drew: "Mhm.") And I think that that's p-- you know! But the point is we need a common enemy to help us fight and so I'm proposing that we all band together and each year we nominate a different person to become a Hipster Hunter uh and they're allowed to basically uh kill anyone that they think is a hipster. (Drew: "OK.")
* Timetable: Josiah will select the first Hipster Hunter soon. She will begin killing men hipsters shortly.
* Idea details:
	+ We need a common enemy and everyone hates hipsters. Each year or maybe every three months or so, everyone in the world will band together and nominate a different person to become a Hipster Hunter.
	+ The Hipster Hunter will be allowed to kill anyone that they think is a hipster.
	+ The Hipster Hunter may be selected based on their sniping stats or something similar.
	+ Once the new Hipster Hunter is selected, there will be a reality show that follows them in their hunting.
	+ The Hipster Hunter will need to be trained to use a parabolic mic so they can hear what people are saying, which will reveal who is a hipster so they can then be hunted.
	+ The Hipster Hunter gets to decide who is a hipster; no one else.
	+ Sometimes the Hipster Hunter can perhaps be a ninja; it doesn't necessarily have to be a sniper.
	+ Josiah gets to pick the first Hipster Hunter and he will make the first Hipster Hunter a woman as a means to check the pantriarch.
	+ The Hipster Hunter is always a woman and all the hipsters killed will be a man, because of the pantri.
	+ The pandemic is the pantriarchy.

## Devil Play

* Drew played devil by stating his belief that you shouldn't kill *any* humans.
	+ Josiah did not directly address this devil, but generally restated his stance that the world needs a common enemy and hipsters have clearly been hated by everyone for the last decade.

## Notable Events

* Josiah and Drew discussed Calgary because the recording of this episode took place during Calgary Awareness Month 2021. They also advertised the Globe Hell Patreon, where subscribers can hear the recent episode YKS to YYC, the first episode of Calgary Awareness Month 2021, starring JF and DB from *Your Kickstarter Sucks* Podcast. They further advertised a new limited edition Calgary Awareness Month shirt design available only on the Globe Hell Merch Store and designed by Josiah.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Christmas Chastity Challenge | TRAILER | Female Supremacy Training for Beta Males" about how during the holiday season, women are overwhelmed with so many tasks to complete. Anyone watching the video version of this episode will become hypnotized by this video.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Your Crush Obsession is so Humiliating | TRAILER | Female Supremacy Training for Beta Males" about how beta males have strong attachments with women.
* Drew revealed that he has a new crush.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Female Interaction Checklist | Female Supremacy Training for Beta Males" about how you are a beta male who was raised in a patriarchy.
* Drew revealed that he has no idea if his crush knows he exists.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Don't Talk to Your CRUSH | Female Supremacy University" about how as a beta-male it is very important that you interact with your superior crush correctly.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Silly Little Beta Male | Female Supremacy Training for Beta Males" about how one of the most effective ways to attack the male's toxic masculinity is for a woman to laugh at him.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called ""Our Common Enemy ..."" about our common enemy.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "14 Hilarious Hipster Jokes" about 14 Hilarious Hipster Jokes! First one to laugh loses!
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Hipster Jokes ... :]" about why did the hipster cross the road? ....You will never know, because telling the punchline is mainstream...
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "BFS 1 - Welcome!!! Funny Hipster Jokes" about Peacejam's first episode featuring funny hipster jokes.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Hipster Joke" about a hipster joke.
* Josiah and Drew briefly watched a video called "Hipster at a Country Restaurant".
* Josiah and Drew rewatched "Hipster Joke".
* Josiah and Drew continued watching "Hipster at a Country Restaurant".
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Hipster Joke".
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Erica's Hipster Joke".
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Hipsters - The Gentlemen's Rant" about the gentlemen's take on hipsters.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Why I Hate Hipsters." about how ever since the blogging era of the late 2000s and early 2010s hipsters have been a growing presence in hip-hop popular for some of the worst opinions known to mankind.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Why No One Can Stand Hipsters" about how hipsters are the ones who are the conformist sheeples.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Hipsters Ruin EVERYTHING! - Chris Porter: A Man From Kansas" about hipster stand-up comedy.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Peter Becomes Every Millennial Hipster Ever - Family Guy" about how Millennial Peter adopts the millennial lifestyle because of hammer, and his methods soon attract the attention of a high-powered Silicon Valley executive.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Bus Stop Sniper Prank" about how someone could hunt hipsters.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Top 10 Best Sniping Games" about how sniping's a good job, mate!
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Erin Kirsh - Hipster Hunter" about how Erin Kirsh came in 2nd place on the 28th of February at the Youth Poetry Slam with her poem Hipster Hunter.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Hipster Hunters" about hipster hunting satire.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Inside The Mind Of A Williamsburg Hipster [Comedy]" about how beyond the skyscrapers of Manhattan, past the East River and in the heart of the borough of Brooklyn, lies a neighborhood unlike any other: Williamsburg.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Charles Bronson Kills Hipsters" about Charles Bronson's best movie you probably never heard of.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Hipster Killer - Eat Them" about the song *Hipster Killer* by Eat Them.
* Josiah and Drew rewatched ""Our Common Enemy ..."".
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Why I Hate Hipsters" about Why I hate Hipsters.
* Josiah discussed how water is a drug: H2O. Drew discussed the drug caffeine.
* Josiah and Drew watched a video called "Excited Stupid Little Beta Male | YOUTUBE EDIT | Female Supremacy Training for Beta Males" about how it is a fact that women are more intelligent than men.
* Josiah and Drew discussed how Johnny Depp is, in many ways, the first hipster, and how Amber Heard is thus naturally suited to potentially being the first Hipster Hunter.

## Notable Quotes

### Josiah

* "I learned that Calgary has the first ever woman mayor uh on Earth."
* "You know, when you hear of a male nurse, and Calgary has a lady mayor. Or is it a -- is it called a secretary at that point? May-- lady mayor. I don't -- I genuinely don't know anything about municipal politics."
* "When Drew said he was a 'cam' boy, I thought it was gonna be something nasty, but he's actually a Calgary Awareness Month boy, so that's what that stands for. So you can stop jacking off."
* [On the topic of Drew showing his willy on CAM sites for a lot of money] "How much is it for the hole?"
* "Now that would be funny if Santa was nasty and he would say, 'Hole, hole, hole!' "
* "So it's Calgary Awareness Month, we're gonna uh learn about what a -- the world's first wom-- lady mayor. Uh and Drew did not vote for -- Drew told me he did not vote for her."
* "I have no idea. But let's just start the fucking episode."
* [In response to Drew saying Josiah always gets mad at him and makes him feel bad] "Well I'm trying to uh make you beta. Cause that's what you love. That's why you watch those videos - you're trying to become the 'master beta'."
* "I'm trying to get a egg yolk, not a damn Thom Yorke! Uh and that's facts."
* "But the point is we need a common enemy to help us fight and so I'm proposing that we all band together and each year we nominate a different person to become a Hipster Hunter uh and they're allowed to basically uh kill anyone that they think is a hipster."
* "Pranks are the ultimate form of satire. They show us a mirror."
* "So, to be clear, you are threatening this woman's life."
* [On the topic of Twitter] "I hate le hell site."
* [On the topic of Invincible House] "*Invisible* Houses. They were invisible!"
* [On the topic of the acronym HMV] "Hipster uh Meeting Vantage is what that stands for."
* "This ninja's got bars!"
* "I don't know what it is about this episode, it just *will not* reach the one-hour mark. It's just taking fucking forever. I don't know if it's cause of your ide-- your thing at the start was uh so poorly thought out, or um --"
* "I've been working on the idea of Hipster Hunter since before it was cool."
* "Oh, the pandemic *is* pantriar-- pantriarchy."

### Drew

* [In response to Josiah saying that a lady mayor is the same thing as a secretary] "Come on! That's not right. That's not a nice thing to say! That's an awful thing to say, Josiah. Especially when I have something prepared today that's all about basically smashing the patriarchy."
* "Well, I also go on -- I go on websites and show my willy off for a lot of money."
* "What if Santa was, instead of being nasty, what if he was gritty and he brought socialism?"
* [On the topic of whether he voted for the first lady mayor in the world who was just elected in Calgary] "I did not vote."
* "If you're not interested in Calgary Awareness Month, check out patreon.com/obeywomen."
* "You always get mad at me, you always make me feel bad."
* "The fuck is this??"
* "We need to go to hang out at hipster bar."
* "I loathe conformity."
* "Damn, I *hate* hipsters."
* "I don't think you should kill *any* humans."
* "Wow, look at those hipsters."
* [In response to Josiah asking if Drew liked his idea this week] "No, I think it's a great idea! Uh I don't know what it's supposed to accomplish. I mean, last -- Josiah, last week -- Josiah, last -- Jos-- Last week, I created Invincible Houses to house the entire planet. And this week, you're saying we should kill hipsters. (Josiah: 'No, *we* shouldn't; the Hipster Hunter should!') OK, well then the Hipster Hunter should do it. These ideas are not equal! My idea saves the world, your idea doesn't!"
* "What if I had a secret life as a hipster, and every night, I went out to the hippest bars and uh did other hip things. See, I'm such a bad hipster, like, I don't even know what to say what I would do as -- I need you to tell me what to do! Mhm. I'm my own thing!"
* "Whenever I see somebody, like a worker, like somebody just like a -- somebody driving a truck, somebody unloading a truck, somebody working construction, I just think that's so uncool, man! Like, why don't you have podcast? Why don't you have your own Substack? You know?"
* "Caffeine's the building blocks of coffee, but it also gets you hooked on the stuff!"
* [On the topic of hippies vs hipsters] "Hippies were almost the uh first communists!"

## Trivia

* When the video version of this episode was originally uploaded, it was erroneously uploaded with only an episode description and no video. Since its original posting, this has been corrected.