Not Again!

Not Again! is the thirteenth chapter of the Wombles Two.

Later they woke up back on the giant pen-making machine.  This was not looking good!

“Psst!  Tara! Can you find a way off of this thing?” Tara looked around.  “Who said that?”  “I did!”  It was Dr King.  “Oh you! No I can’t, can you?”  “Well…” said Dr King.  “If Steed hadn’t drifted over to the other side, I would’ve asked him to teach me some AEIOU.”  “What is AEIOU?” “Advanced Escapology for Idiots Or Unlucky agents.”  “Oh!” said Tara.  “Why isn’t that AEFIOUA?” “I’m not sure.  You don’t know any then?”  “No, ask Mrs Peel.”  So Dr King did.  “Mrs Peel! Psst!  Do you know any AEIOU?”  “Yes.” Replied Mrs Peel.  “Steed taught me some when I was Mrs Steed.”  “Can you teach us?”  “No.” “Why?”  “Because there’s no point.  I could just use it myself then untie you.”  “Oh yes I see what you mean.  Can you do that then please?”  Mrs Peel did, just before Steed and Cathy leapt in.

Everyone started to run away.  “No! Don’t run away!” said Steed. “We’ve decided to join you lot again.” “Why?” asked One Ten.  “You turned good but when?”  “Because,” said Steed.  “We were treated like weeds.  They threatened to kill us.  They threatened to bill us.  They punched us and kicked us and bopped us about.  They did it so much that they made us shout!”  “Hang on,” said Father.  “One Ten you were in a village where they asked for your pens.”  “I escaped.” Said One Ten.  “They didn’t get my pens.”  “Oh ok.” Said Father.  “Wait why did everything rhyme just now?”  One Ten said, “I’m a poet.  I make rhymes and never blow it.  By the way where are the wombles?  Have they been crumbled?”  “Most of them will be at the burrow.” Said Mrs Peel.  “But Bungo, Alderney and Yellowstone…”  “What about them?” asked Grandma.  “They went to the Dickensian house.” Replied Mrs Peel.  “Let’s go!” said Steed, so they all ran to the rescue.

About half way there, Mrs Peel suddenly stopped.  “What’s the matter?” asked Steed.  “I just realised that Peter’s still with TODE.” Replied Mrs Peel. “Oh yes.” Said Steed.  “Well I guess I’ll go back to you and be Mrs Steed again.” Said Emma.  “Um… well… I…” said Steed.  “Well you what?” asked Emma.  “I… kind of… sort of…”  “What?” Steed shut his eyes tight and said quickly, “I asked Cathy to marry me.”  “And she said yes?”  “Yes.” Emma looked at Cathy with rage. “Not all this fighting over people again!” said Steed.  “The next thing I’ll know you’ll want to kill her!”  He said this like a joke, but then Emma said, “Yes, that is the next thing you’ll know.”  “What? Don’t you dare!” said Steed.  “And this time I know for sure that it is NOT those toads doing it to me.”  “Er, that’s TODE.” Said Steed.  “That’s what I said.” Said Emma.

The wombles were trying to dance at what was left of the Womblelation. Every time they tried though their fur got quite a bad prickly feeling.  “Bulgaria!” shouted Idaho.  “Great despite everything that’s happened Bulgaria, if don’t mind” he replied looking at Idaho through both pairs of glasses.  Now Idaho’s fur prickled more than ever.  “Never mind that!  Bungo, Alderney and Yellowstone are missing.” Idaho said urgently.  “They can go out on their own you know” replied Great Despite Everything That’s Happened Bulgaria.  “But Bulgaria!  It’s dinner time!  No womble misses dinner!” shouted Idaho.  “And it is dandelion pie with holly berry cream followed thistle flower crunch!” added Madame Cholet.  “Great Scott!” shouted Tobermory and he started singing.  “Na na na na Na na na na Na na na na Wombat!  Womble Wonder to the Wombatmobile!”.  Tobermory and Tomsk looked for the Wombatmobile but it had gone. “Excuse me” said Wellington.  “Yes Super Womble?” asked Wombat (Wellington was wearing his costume as well).  “Can I have a toy car from the Womblegarten?” he asked.  “It isn’t time to play!” shouted Miss Adelaide but Wellington had already rushed to the Womblegarten to fetch the remote-control racing car. Tobermory had fixed it after Bungo found it on the common.