Starfire VS Android 18

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Starfire VS Android 18 is the 12th and seemingly final episode of Fatal Fiction, it features Starfire from DC Comics' Teen Titans and Android 18 from Dragon Ball.

### Youtube

*Lazuli of Dragonball Z faces Koriand'r of Teen Titans fame, which powerful woman will win in the battle of flying bricks, Robot VS Alien style?*

## Interlude

Game Hawk: When you think of powerful warriors, what comes to mind?

Proto Dude: Robots, machines built by mankind to replicate mankind.

Redwolf: Aliens, extraterrestrial beings that wish to be taken to our leader.

Game Hawk: Now imagine if they were all more on the... feminine side.

Proto Dude: You mean like Starfire, the Tamaranean princess who fights for the Teen Titans?

Redwolf: What about Android 18, former enemy of the Z­Fighters?

Game Hawk: You guys know what time it is, time for the first ever Fatal Fiction catfight!

Redwolf: Wait a minute, catfight? I thought that Black Cat VS Catwoman was next season.

Proto Dude: \*Sigh\* I'm Proto Dude,

Redwolf: I'm Redwolf,

Game Hawk: I'm Game Hawk,

Redwolf: And it's our job to evaluate both the strengths and weaknesses of these fighters.

## Android 18

Proto Dude: Back when Son Goku was just a boy, he went on a mission: to collect all seven Dragon Balls. Little did he know, the Red Ribbon Army just so happened to be after the same goal.

Game Hawk: Thanks to its lead scientist Dr. Gero, the Red Ribbon Army had flourished in the field of robotics. Luckily, Goku was no ordinary boy and he managed to defeat all of Gero's creations, along with the rest of the Red Ribbon.

Redwolf: However, being the brilliant child that he is, Goku let one man escape: the brain of the Red Ribbon in the first place, Dr. Gero.

Game Hawk: Inspired by Goku's incredible might, Gero no longer had any desire to build an army. I mean come on, if one kid in an orange jumpsuit with a monkey tail can plow through your entire army with ease, what's the point of even having an army?

Redwolf: Well, at least it's not as embarrassing as having your entire army beaten by a kid in an orange jumpsuit with whiskers and a fox inside of him.

Proto Dude: Oh god.... Anyways, Dr. Gero focused not on rebuilding his army, but on creating only a few soldiers, each of them with enough power to defeat any army on earth.

Game Hawk: However, in order to ensure that his creations would be powerful enough to match Goku, he would have to study the Saiyan's every move. After creating a remote tracking device disguised as a ladybug, Dr. Gero made it follow Goku everywhere, recording all of his fights.

Redwolf: All of his fights until he left to visit Namek and save the universe from Mewtwo's androgynous brother, that is.

Proto Dude: Regardless, the data that he analyzed was more than enough to create the perfect murder machines, including a pair of artificial humans he called Android #17, and Android #18.

Game Hawk: Originally a human named Lazuli, our favourite blondie used to be a notorious delinquent. While he was out fishing for guinea pigs, Dr. Gero would meet Lazuli and her twin brother Lapis by chance.

Redwolf: Lapis and Lazuli, I get it! Like the gemstone!

Proto Dude: We get it Redwolf, we get it. Anyways, after the twins were kidnapped, Dr. Gero transformed them into cyborgs.

Game Hawk: Then why are they called androids?

Redwolf: Because Funimation hired a random person off the streets to translate the script for them and the mistranslation just stuck.

Proto Dude: As an artifical human, Android 18 has no need to eat. Furthermore, her cells deteriorate at a snail's pace, allowing her to age far slower than any human.

Redwolf: And yet, she still needs to drink. To which I ask.... why?

Game Hawk: Something tells me that we should really stop trying to apply logic to anime. The two concepts mix about as well as peanut butter and tuna salad.

Proto Dude: Well said. Anyways, after Android 18 was awakened, it became clear that she was one of the strongest enemies yet.

Redwolf: As an artificial human, Android 18's stamina is nearly unlimited; as demonstrated in the battle between Android 17 and Piccolo, an android's ki reserve is nearly impossible to exhaust in a single duel. In other words, she has a lot of staying power.

Game Hawk: Thanks to her enormous amount of ki, Android 18 possesses superhuman strength, insane combat speed, and enough durability to endure whatever attacks come her way.

Proto Dude: Furthermore, the form of ki she holds is unique, and can not be detected even by other ki users.

Game Hawk: If you think that spells trouble for her enemies, just wait until you see her techniques!

Proto Dude: Like the android barrier, where energy launches out of her body to create an omnidirectional shield that not only defends against projectiles, but damages anything eclipsed by it.

Game Hawk: Let's not forget the destructo disk, a projection of ki shaped like a blade that can slice through mountains, or Frieza's tail. She can even throw it in pairs of two!

Proto Dude: This technique was most likely taught to her by her husband Krillin.

Game Hawk: Wait a minute.... Krillin married a hot chick!? That's impossible!

Redwolf: Almost as impossible as a power level above 9,000. Oh wait, that happened two sagas ago.

Proto Dude: Are we really doing an over 9,000 joke in 2015?

Game Hawk: Of course, Android 18 is also familiar with the basics of ki, able to use every thing from energy waves to finger beams to flight.

Proto Dude: And of course there's her ultimate technique; the energy mine. By launching 5 yellow spheres around her opponent, she can bounce them around like a pinball until they explode.

Game Hawk: For a mere robo­chick, Android 18 has accomplished some unbelievable feats within the Dragon Ball universe.

Redwolf: I bet she can't beat a Super Saiyan!

(Shows clip of her breaking Vegeta's arm with a single clip)

Game Hawk: You were saying?

Redwolf: Well, it looks like Vegeta sure got disarmed.

Proto Dude: That's not the only Super Saiyan that got disarmed by her. She also defeated Future Trunks with ease, effortlessly shattering his sword in the process, the same sword that he used to slice through Frieza like a knife through hot butter.

Redwolf: You know, the dude who's durable enough to survive a planet buster while half his body is missing? The dude who can get up from a spirit bomb? The dude whose ultimate desire is to caress a bunch of balls for an eternity?

Proto Dude: She's managed to kill both Tien and Piccolo with one clean hit, overpowered Future Gohan, curbstomped Trunks, and effortlessly terminated Krillin.

(Even Krillin was destroyed clip plays)

Game Hawk: Hold up, hold up, hold up. Did he just say even Krillin was destroyed? Seriously? That would be like if somebody beat the Avengers and then went "man, it sure was impressive how I kicked Hawkeye's ass!"

Redwolf: It should be noted that the android responsible for wiping out the ZFighters was not the Android 18 of the main Dragonball world, but rather the Android 18 that existed in a parallel timeline. A timeline that contained weaker heroes... and weaker androids.

Game Hawk: Wait, you're telling me that the Android 18 in the present is even stronger than her future counterpart? How is that even possible!?

Redwolf: Because, uh.... reasons?

Proto Dude: The Android 18 of the present timeline is not only stronger, but also less of a murderous psychopath, she even became a heroine and had a daughter with Krillin.

Game Hawk: A daughter that Krillin named after his ex­girlfriend. I wish I was joking.

Redwolf: Wait, there's one thing I still don't understand...

Game Hawk: The fact that she settled with baldie over here?

Redwolf: No, what I don't get is how the hell an android or cyborg or artificial human or whatever the hell she is managed to get pregnant. She doesn't eat or drink, runs on an internal battery, and had a bomb inside her that could kill her yet SOMEHOW she can give birth to a healthy baby girl.

LOGIC show LOGIC!

Game Hawk: This the same show that thinks alien look EXACTLY like humans apart from tails, 5 year olds can kill Dinosaurs, and that if you scream like you're constipated for five minutes straight you achieve the ultimate power. I think they threw logic out the window a LONG time ago.

Redwolf: That aside, her most impressive feat of all, without a doubt, is defeating Hercule Satan, and that dude is strong enough to singlehandedly beat up Cell.

Game Hawk: Actually that was just a-

Redwolf: Dude, Hercule was strong enough to defeat CELL!

Game Hawk: Well, can't argue with that I suppose, that alone makes her the strongest girl in Dragonball.

Redwolf: Strongest girl in Dragonball? How is that even an accomplishment? That's like being the smartest child with down syndrome.

Game Hawk: Yeah.... while Android 18 was easily one of the strongest characters at the time of her debut, she has long since been surpassed by the likes of Majin Buu, Bills, the ZFighters, and Cell, who absorbed her in the most suggestive looking scene known to Dragonball.

Proto Dude: After the Cell saga, Android 18 neglected to train, resulting in her failing to keep up with her peers. But even if she did, her so-called slope is rather limited, and her power level can not grow as quickly as a Saiyan's can.

Game Hawk: Another problem Android 18 faces is the fact that she has never even once faced an opponent on her level. In every battle she has participated in, she was either curbstomped, or did the curbstomping herself. And since it's usually the latter, her mindset in battle is one of overconfidence.

Proto Dude: Also keep in mind that since she usually fights in a pair with her brother, she is not used to solo combat, and her best attacks all revolve around teamwork with him.

Redwolf: And finally, a weakness so great it needs to be brought up once again.... she's married to Krillin.

Game Hawk: That noseless midget is one lucky bastard, that's for sure.

*Android 18: I have to whip you into shape every now and then honey*

*Krillin: Try not to kill me baby?*

## Starfire

Redwolf: A long time ago in a galaxy far far away, there lived a race of aliens called the Tamaraneans, on a planet called.... Tamaran.

Game Hawk: The Tamaraneans were an emotional race who used feelings as the force that drove their livelihoods. They were led by King Myand'r and Queen Luand'r, with three different heirs to the throne:

Proto: The back­stabbing Princess Komand'r, also known as Blackfire,

Redwolf: The young prince Ryand'r, also known as Wildfire,

Game Hawk: And the cheerful princess Koriand'r, also known as.... Starfire.

Redwolf: Wait a minute, isn't Coriander a cooking herb?

Game Hawk: Huh, I guess Toriyama wasn't the first person to name aliens after vegetables after all.

Proto Dude: But one day, the unthinkable happened; Tamaran was invaded by Gordanians. The Tamaraneans fought back, but they were outnumbered, and soon the once lush and beautiful tropical planet was war-torn and ravished.

Game Hawk: As it turns out, Blackfire betrayed her home planet out of jealousy of her younger siblings, resulting in their parents dying, Tamaran being torn apart, Wildfire being sent to another galaxy never to be seen again, and Starfire being sold as a slave.

Redwolf: Wow.... what a douche.

Proto Dude: But as it turns out, slavery was a blessing in disguise for Starfire. As she was being transported by her captors, she used her innate alien strength to escape the prison ship and landed on the nearest planet, that being Earth.

Game Hawk: After meeting Robin and going through a series of random events, the Teen Titans was formed. They would go on to become the strongest team of sidekicks the earth had ever seen, and the brawn of the team was not Cyborg, but rather, it was the Tamaranean princess herself.

Redwolf: Of course, what would an alien super heroine be without superpowers and heroine?

Proto: Considering that Tamaraneans are a race of natural born warriors, they tend to be skilled in martial arts, and Starfire is no exception. She was even taught how to use a bow and arrow.

Game Hawk: I wish I could learn Tamaranean martial arts.

Redwolf: On that note, the Tamaraneans are an emotional race, as such feelings are the force that drive their very livelihoods. Because of this, Starfire is inherently the most sensitive member of the Titans. No, not those titans.

Proto Dude: Indeed. In fact, her natural flight is fueled by her unbridled joy.

Game Hawk: What the hell? I remember how excited I was when our channel got two thousand subscribers, and I sure as hell didn't gain the ability to fly.

Proto: Well, it has more to do with her Tamaranean physiology than anything else, it even allows her to fly in space without oxygen for extended periods of time.

Redwolf: With her boundless confidence, Starfire practically becomes a flying brick, with incredible physical strength and durability.

Game Hawk: And thanks to her righteous fury, Starfire can project powerful energy blasts ranging from star bolts to energy beams to eye lasers. Geez, I wonder how she can use those without burning her eyes off.

Proto Dude: Well, it is explained that Tamaraneans can resist intense amounts of heat and radiation.

Redwolf: Furthermore, she can release her energy omnidirectionally, even using it as a shield.

Game Hawk: Most bizarrely, whenever she kisses somebody, she learns whatever language they speak, which led to her kissing Robin to learn English... and then a Japanese boy right in front of Robin.

Redwolf: Somebody tell her to kiss me, I need to learn Japanese so that I can watch anime without

Game Hawk: Um, it doesn't work the other way around Redwolf.

Redwolf: NOOOOO!!!!! MY OTAKU DREAMS!!!!!!!

Proto Dude: Over the years, Starfire has performed an encyclopedia's worth of impressive feats, having been shown to push back meteors that threatened the earth and tear through a barrier that was powered by the core of an entire planet.

Game Hawk: And let's not forget the scene where she survived a bomb that destroyed a planet several times over.

Proto Dude: Indeed, Starfire's durability is so great, she could survive being at the epicenter of a blast that consumed a planet many time overs. To put this into perspective, if we presume that this unnamed planet was the size of earth, that would mean Starfire can survive withstand an attack capable of destroying the earth more than one thousand times over, releasing nearly 60 yottatons worth of force. By comparison, it would take around 45 yottatons worth of TNT to destroy planet Saturn.

Game Hawk: Hooooollly shit, I bet that attack must've left her injured for a week, at LEAST.

Proto Dude: Nope! Right after being hit with the explosion, the only consequence was.... her hair being messed up.

Game Hawk: You mean to tell me that she got hit with an explosion big enough to destroy Saturn, and it only ruined her hairstyle?

Proto Dude: Yuuuuup.

Game Hawk: Jesus, and people complain that Superman is overpowered. Moving on, she's no slouch in the speed department either. Her speed is so great, she can exceed the speed of light; that's over 300,000,000 meters per second! This allows her to fly across solar systems in short time periods and dodge beams of light from, you guessed it, Doctor Light himself.

Proto Dude: The problem with some of Starfire's speed feats is that most of the celestial objects in the Teen Titans universe are fictional, meaning that it's nigh­impossible to get an accurate number for her speed.

Game Hawk: Thankfully, there is one scene we can draw from to determine Starfire's maximum speed, and that is when she flew past the moon in a fraction of a second.

Proto Dude: On average, the moon is about 384,400 kilometers away from the earth. By playing the scene in slow motion, we can determine that she flew past it in about one­tenth of a second, meaning that she can fly over 1,153,200 kilometers in a single second, making her around at least 4 times the speed of light.

Game Hawk: Aside from Raven, Starfire is easily the strongest member of the Teen Titans. She's even bested her sister Blackfire on numerous occasions, and perhaps her most notable accomplishment was when she not only stood up to the planet busting reality warper Trigon, but also defeated his heralds. That said, she's not exactly invulnerable.

Proto Dude: For example, when she gets a cold.... it's really painful for her considering that she constantly sneezes out explosive starbolts.

Game Hawk: At least she doesn't sneeze away solar systems, that would just be ridiculous.

Redwolf: Let's not forget that Starfire is allergic to metallic chromium. I have no idea why such a specific weakness was written, but thanks DC comics!

Proto Dude: Uh, doesn't DC stand for detective comics anyways? Wouldn't that be Detective Comics Comics.

Redwolf: Well holy redundant department of redundancy, Batman!

Proto Dude: It's Proto Man­ I mean Proto Dude!

Redwolf: Nobody cares.

Proto Dude: \*Sigh\* Let's just get the elephant out of the room; Starfire is.... not the smartest. After all, she's young and naive, new to earth's customs if you will. Despite this, she is not actually stupid per se.

Redwolf: A woman who celebrates drapery abuse sounds really stupid to me.

Proto Dude: Now she may not be a genius, but she's always been a wise perceptive individual, in fact she was the first one to figure out that Robin wasn't behind the probes in the episode apprentice, and she figured out that he was Red X before anybody else did.

*(Shows clip of Starfire's incompetence)*

Redwolf: You were saying?

Proto Dude: .... Never mind. Well, at least she's a better character than her slutty comic book counterpart.

Game Hawk: Well besides that, she loses a lot of her power under circumstances where she is depressed. But that's no reason to underestimate her, you know why? Because she's a member of the Teen Titans.

*Starfire: I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I am stronger than I look!*

## Fatal Fiction

*(Mario jumps to knock the box with his head as a coin appears with Starfire winning the home territory advantage as the fight will take place in Jump City)*

Proto Dude: Well it looks like this is going down on Starfire's home turf.

Android 18: This city sure was fun, its a shame that it must come to an end!

*As Android 18 charges up her attack, Starfire appears to stop her causing Android 18 to cease charging up.*

Starfire: Alright you clord bang. Now that I have finally found you, no further cities shall be victims of your destruction!

Android 18: Foolish girl, if your THIS eager to meet your doom, I'll happly abolish.

**Fatal Fiction Referee: FIGHT!**

## Results

Game Hawk: Holy crap, a Dragon Ball character just beat a DC character! Quick everybody, call the presses!

Proto Dude: Sarcasm aside here, this battle was an extremely close call, but in the end Android 18's destructive capability and durability were too much for poor Starfire to handle. After all, while Starfire can survive the planet busting mine that released 60 yottatons worth of explosives, Android 18 managed to curbstomp Super Saiyan Vegeta. For reference, Super Saiyan Vegeta is even stronger than Frieza's final form, and even Frieza's first form was powerful enough to destroy Planet Vegeta. As Planet Vegeta had 10 times the gravity of planet earth, that should put it's gravitational binding energy in the ballpark of 700 yottatons of TNT equivalent, which Frieza must have overpowered in order to destroy it.

Game Hawk: But Proto, what about speed? Surely Android 18 isn't fast enough to keep up with Starfire, now is she?

Proto Dude: Well you see, Android 18 doesn't have many speed feats of her own, but as we all know, she was able to keep up with the likes of Vegeta and Trunks. As early as the Saiyan saga, Piccolo's beams were fast enough to reach the moon in the ballpark of around five seconds. This is at least 200,000 times the speed of sound, or about one­fourth the speed of light.

Redwolf: While Starfire may be faster, Android 18 could certainly hold her own, and with the massive strength advantage, this was by all means her battle to win. In strength VS speed debates.... always side with the top side of the triangles.

Game Hawk: Especially when the stronger opponent can fight for a virtually unlimited amount of time without even the slightest hint of exhaustion. Let's not forget that while Starfire is a powerful flying alien with energy projection, Android 18 has plenty of experience not only fighting, but also utterly demolishing them with ease.

Redwolf: I guess Android 18 is the star of this party. The winner is Android 18. The loser.... is everybody who likes Teen Titans Go.

Proto Dude: Hey, at least our show is better than Teen Titans Go, right?

Redwolf: I swear there is a really annoying musquito buzzing around.