Objecto 500

This episode is based on the upcoming Indy 500

*Object Oblivion*

*Objecto 500*

La Isla De Objeto was covered in racing themed material, obviously for the Indy 500. The trees were T. P’d with black and white streamers, the paths were often staked with a checkered flag, and all the lights were glowing a beautiful green. Blue Spirit had a checklist and made some final looks.

“Okay,” he said, crossing some things out with a pen he found, “And there we go! We are ALL set for the Indy 500! I even gave the Eliminated contestants a TV!”

Bricky, who is helping by setting up the snack table, said, “Would they be able to keep it afterwards? It is boring down in the dudgeon, as I heard yesterday from Comic Book.”

“Yup,” he replied with, “Mainly since other than the racing channel, there’s also only the News station, sport channels, and a movie channel that only plays films with Adam Sandler involved.”

“Yikes,” said Soda, only terrified by the last thing he said, “They won’t like being forced to watch terrible films.”

Blue Spirit only shrugged him off and walked on till he noticed Prism with some vodka, “Hey Prism… I noticed you have some alcohol with you…” She was starting to get easily worried, until, “May I have some, I have to act ‘nice’ to Fruitcake.” She gave him a bottle and moved on. She put the bottles on the table and started to organize them. “Eh…” said Blue Spirit, done drinking his vodka, “Maybe we should do the voting now…\*hic\*”

“Fine by me,” said Prism, sitting down with Fruitcake and TNT, wondering who’ll be eliminated.

“Now…” however, Blue Spirit fell asleep due to the drink. One slap from Toothbrush manages to wake him back up, “HUH? Oh right! You three have been put up here for three reasons whether it’s for: Existing, Fading to Quick, or a Drunk-Diss Speech. We received Forty votes this time! With this sexy statue of me being picked this time! Recommended by ‘Boris Crafts,’ a wonderful reader of our show.”

“Yikes!” said TNT, out of shock

“Hey… I can say sexy if I want to,” said Blue Spirit, obviously thinking he’s insulting him.

“No… we had a v-v-v-v-vote decrease!” He was pointing out that the votes have been dropped by seventeen.

“Oh that…” he said, realizing what TNT meant, “Whatever.” He then slides a statue to Fruitcake because, “Fruitcake only received two votes… somehow.”

“Yay,” said Fruitcake, happy he gets to compete for another day.

“TNT, Prism…” said Blue Spirit, calling out on them, “Both of you received nineteen votes. It is a tie!”

“Oh…” said Prism, realizing she is in the bottom two with TNT, “How are we going to do it?”

“A Final-Jeopardy question,” said Blue Spirit, putting the two in scoreboard podiums, “Just answer this question correctly. Which is based on ‘Death of a Salesman’…”

“I’ll beat you,” said Prism, prepared to answer correctly, “What’s the question?”

“This character is a womanizer, this character is a thief, and this character is the old man who thinks success is necessary and required…”

Prism just stood blank, thinking, “Wait… what? Who the heck is he talking about by thief?”

While standing blank, TNT manages to turn in his answer, “Happy, Biff, and Willy.”

“Correct,” said Blue Spirit, confirming he won the tiebreaker.

“I r-r-r-read the book,” said TNT, happy he won the tiebreaker.

“So, what does that make me,” asked Prism, realizing she just lost.

“Eliminated,” said Blue Spirit, sending Prism off with a launcher platform, sending her to the Dudgeon.

“Yikes,” said Toothbrush, catching the whole scene with her eyes, “Prism just got eliminated!”

All Bricky did was sigh in disappointment, saying, “Darned Danielle fans!” But she calmed down, “Oh well, at least she’s changed.”

 TNT
 Prism | 19

 'Non-Use Re-Chosen prizes' by Laclale
 'Statue of Blue Spirit' by Boris Craft | 18

“So…” said Soda, realizing with Snakey, Comic Book, Basketball, Mp3, Envelope, Crayon, and now Prism eliminated, “Does that mean we made it to the Final 6?”

“Yup,” said Blue Spirit, however he then stated, “For an episode. Someone’s returning and someone’s joining.”

“Oh right,” said Toothbrush, realizing what he means, “God! Just tell us when they’ll happen already!”

“Well voting for the ‘Joining’ will end in two weeks from this episode’s release… but the ‘Returning’ will happen now,” said Blue Spirit, holding up a checkered flag, somehow. “It will be a race! Through this start line, which just appeared in front of you all, all through the woods, the desert, and the caves… which are rumored to be full of Diamonds, Gold, and even a Grocery Store!”

“Uh… okay,” said Bricky, questioning the ‘Grocery Store’ part of the cave. “But Blue Spirit, what happens if we win?”

“Then you get to reinvite any eliminated contestant back into the game for redemption,” said Blue Spirit, holding up photos of ALL the eliminated contestants from this Season… so far. “You guys might’ve thought of this, but need reminding, that you guys actually know who you’ll bring back. And I love it!”

“Well then,” said Toothbrush, understanding the concept a little, “I guess that is why we had to spend some time in the confession stand and discuss who’ll we bring back.” But then she started another question, “Do we at least get vehicles… or…”

“Nope, they are all Go-Karts,” said Blue Spirit, showing them off. Everyone was glancing at the rainbow vehicles. Each one different: One red, One orange, One yellow, One green, One aquamarine, and One violet.

“Wait! Aquamarine nuh a cola inna di rainbow!” said Bowling Ball, saying that the colors are off for it to be a true rainbow… and he isn’t wrong.

“Wikipedia told me it was,” said Blue Spirit, trying to make up and excuse, which was true, “Sigh… it’s like that one incident that got me in trouble with the people of San Antonio… I really shouldn’t have made up that basement theory.” Then he shook his head and said, “Now decorate your vehicles any way you like… and Go!”

The contestants ran off to the arts and craft center to grab some supplies, “I’m gonna get me some ear pipes so my kart has a smile with it.”

Blue Spirit used that time as an opportunity to eat his Lunch; Lasagna, with some garlic bread and broccoli’ n’ cheese. Then he got another phone call with Lucas. “Hey, Lucas… got my message about there being a problem?”

“Yup…” said Lucas, obviously concerned by it, “Please tell me you didn’t lose the Recovery Center or get involved with the lawsuit against Danielle for the diss, or in the matter of fact sent a contestant up to space!”

“No no no,” said Blue Spirit, declaring none of those happened, “I’m talking about the rejoin votes! I got Soda, Toothbrush, and Bowling Ball wanting Snakey to rejoin… heck even TNT wants her back, and he hasn’t even met her!”

“Okay…” said Lucas, obviously feeling like he wants to give a facepalm, “CALM THE HECK DOWN!!! So, it’s not like you can do anything, remember? OAAA!”

“I’m not wanting Snakey to NOT rejoin,” said Blue Spirit, “But I fear that all my Producers will quit on me! Last week, Jeff quitted because he complained that a Parrot got to be in the workforce despite being a nonobject!”

“His loss,” said Lucas, having no sympathy for him, “We actually give good paychecks and we even get you out of Jury Duty. Though you may have a point… people have been protesting nonobjects and animals in the workforce. They gave them threats of death and lynch, they gave them nasty looks, they banned them from almost every restaurant in the world, and they spilled their milks!”

“Are the ‘they’ the people and the ‘them/their’ the animals/nonobjects?” asked Blue Spirit

“Yup… now no worries, I told them all, and I mean ALL of them, that they can not mock the animals/nonobjects… but you can panic now since now there’s only three left! Including me!” Blue Spirit did so immediately, realizing his team of fifty lawyers and producers are now only three of them.

“I gotta prevent those four from winning,” said Blue Spirit, not wanting to lose his last producers and be forced to cancel the show, “Thanks the info!”

“Wait… I wasn’t done…” Lucas said, as Blue Spirit hung up on him.

At this point everyone was done: Toothbrush took the green kart and covered it with ‘Support OAAA’ on it, Bricky took the violet car and covered with sparkles, Soda took the orange car and added a smile to it, Fruitcake took the aquamarine car and wrote with a sharpie ‘This was suppose to be blue!’, TNT took the yellow car and added a flaming detail, and Bowling Ball… added nothing because of his lack of arms.

“You all ready,” asked Blue Spirit. Everyone nodded and headed for the starting line, “On your mark, get set, as Lorde always said, ‘go for the greenlight!’ now!” Everyone then spuds up towards 50 mph in zero to five seconds, dashing through the course… except for Bowling Ball, he and his kart just stood there, depressed and unmoving. “Oh right, this challenge is a disadvantage to him… well three to go!”

In the woods, the racers were swishing through the trees, but of course there are dangers! One hazard is the fact of low hanging branches, they can cause a HUGE disadvantage and knock the driver off. There are also bears, dangerous deer, and a ‘Sign’.

After a while of driving, Toothbrush asks, “Where’s BB?” She looked around but failed to find him.

“Must’ve gott-t-t-t-t-tten lost,” said TNT, also not knowing where he is.

Blue Spirit hid in one of the branches on the trees and oversaw the WHOLE race. He saw TNT and Toothbrush racing side by side. “I know they are currently 3rd and 4th… but I’m not taking any chances! If I could lower one of the branches… oh wait!” He activated a remote which lowered one of the upcoming trees. Toothbrush took note of it and ducked along with TNT. Just as Blue Spirit realized that plan backfired somehow, he noticed that the branch somehow ignited TNT. “Oh, this will be good!” Toothbrush notices that TNT’s fuse has been lit and is almost done… causing her to drive faster, far enough so she wasn’t near the impact. TNT, questioning where she’s going, ends up blowing up.

Bricky overhears the explosion and says, “TNT, not the best time to be exploding! Wildfires are a no-no!” She then parked her kart and walked in the woods, “What’s wrong with just ONE walk in here…” As she walked on, she saw birds, Meese, raccoons, and other nature creatures… then she reached the sign. It was a sign of… a photo of Moe Syzlak from The Simpsons. She, in total shock, runs away from the sign, fearing it will come to life and runs into a whole family reunion of deer. “Aw… cute!” She said… before they started growling and cornering her up.

The desert was next. All they had to do was swerve a few turns and go through bunny hills to make it through… not so challenging eh.

Soda was near Fruitcake and decided to start a conversation with him, “So Fruitcake. If you win who are you bringing back?”

Fruitcake hasn’t decided. He has been thinking very hard about this, but nothing really occurred to him. “I don’t know; definitely never Basketball, Crayon, Envelope or Mp3… actually I still might consider her… yeah, either Comic Book, Mp3, Prism, or Snakey.”

“Well… it’s up to you really,” said Soda, giving some wonderous advice, “Also if you need to calm down, eat redwood!” He then gets a lumber piece of redwood and eats it, almost grossing out Fruitcake.

Blue Spirit, hiding behind the cactus, spies on the two side by side racers. “All I have is this nest of African Killer Bees, so maybe I should throw it at them!” He does so… but gets to close to the prickles of the cactus. “Ow…”

The nests lands on Soda’s kart, who is now terrified of the outcome… however instead of attacking him they target on Toothbrush, who is once again stung and crashes her kart into the cactus, killing her. “Geez, I feel like they rather take down Toothbrush more than anyone else.” He knocks the hive off and continues driving with Fruitcake, the only other racer available.

“Close enough… ow…” said Blue Spirit, trying to resist the pain, but is failing to. He manages to make it to the cavern though. He hid in the area with the diamonds as he knows he’ll be able to blend in. “How am I to scare off Soda… but wait, that means the loser will win… sigh, screw it, I cannot afford to lose my producers!” He manages to toss a radio onto Soda’s kart and says through his, “Yeah this is your… uh… Uncle Fakeperson! Yes, that’ll do!”

“Oh Fakeperson,” said Soda, actually falling for the bait, “Hi! What d you need me for?”

“Oh, I need you to uh…” Blue Spirit needed an idea, then he got one immediately, “Get some milk, please. Bye!”

“Oh boy,” said Soda, accepting the challenge, “Thank the lords there is the Grocery store!” he parks his kart and goes to the shop. Fruitcake notices the scene and shrugs it off.

Blue Spirit, finished with his tasks, returns to the line to congratulate Fruitcake… only to be asked, “Weh did you? mi tink yuh did a guh gimme sum help,” from Bowling Ball. He was still in his kart, still in the same spot he was when the race started.

“Oh sorry,” said Blue Spirit, obviously lying, but then he decided to be a little honest, “Only way you can win now is if Fruitcake bumps you into victory. And like that’s ever going to happen.” Fruitcake was inches to reaching his finish, then when he applied the brakes, he steered out of control and bumped straight into Bowling Ball, who moved passed the finish line, thus declaring him the winner. “Uh… I was joking… heh heh…” After a while, he just went, “I need a moment!” He ran off into the woods, confusing Bowling Ball and Fruitcake.

Blue Spirit was with the Eliminated contestants, drinking more vodka, telling them what happened. Everyone was shocked, upset, appalled, but unbitter. “I underssssssssstand your situation,” said Snakey, nuzzling the Spirit, though also reminding him, “But did you have to kill people jusssssssst to make your way?”

“So does Snakey get to rejoin or not,” said Basketball, impatient.

Prism approaches him, sick of the attitude, and says, “Take this ticket. I was given these a week after Episode one… but since I revealed my true colors. I don’t need them; but you and Envelope do!” After he grabs his ticket, she says, “Sometimes you would have more friends if you were not such jack donkey butt!” This opened his eyes wide as he realized, was she right…

“All the above…” Blue Spirit replied with, obviously depressed and drinking away his problems.

“All the above,” said Comic Book, confused, “So, yes she gets to rejoin… but no since…”

“I lost all of my producers…” Blue Spirit looked as he was about to cry, “There’s no way I’ll be able to continue the show!” However, he received a phone call, “Yes hello? Oh Lucas! Can it be later… I…”

“Blue Spirit listen to me,” said Lucas, obviously being assertive, “I wanted to tell you that no matter what happens. I’ll still be with for a long time! After every disaster, war, or biggest scandal of the world. I’m your man! And you know you can lead with only one producer! Yes, the other two quit upon Snakey’s likely rejoin… but you are better than you think! Okay!?”

“You’re…” said Blue Spirit, clearing up his tears and becoming more confident, “You’re right! Snakey, follow me!” She did as promise and followed Blue Spirit. “Thanks Lucas! I’ll call you back!”

In the middle of the field with Bowling Ball, Fruitcake and Soda… they are joined by the recently recovered TNT, Toothbrush and Bricky. “Where’s Blue Spirit?”

“I don’t know,” said Soda, holding the milk ‘Uncle Fakeperson’ wanted, “But at least I did my chore.”

“Look,” said Toothbrush, pointing to a green scarfed Blue Spirit, “I see him!” They ran up towards him and asked him so many questions about where he was.

“I’m… I’m fine… really,” said Blue Spirit, trying to cover up the whole incident, “But, remember when I said I promised a rejoined contestant?”

“Yes?” said Toothbrush. But then she took notice of the scarf he had on, “A scarf? But we are on the end of May!” The scarf then moved to reveal… Snakey. “Oh, my Dental Floss! My BFF!” She hugged her as they both saw each other once again.

“Snakey,” said Soda, running to her, “It’s been to long! I missed you! I love you and… uh…” He was blushing hard, however Snakey nuzzled him.

“It’sssssssssss all good,” she said, before noticing the milk, ‘What’ssssssss with that?”

“Oh,” said Soda, realizing he still has it, “This milk was meant for my Uncle Fakeperson.” Then Blue Spirit took it and drank it all, giving the empty jug back to him, “Uh… since when are my Uncles spirits?” He obviously wasn’t happy.

*Ahem! Blue Spirit…!*

“Huh!? Oh right,” said Blue Spirit, remembering what he was supposed to be doing. “Voting for the joining contestant ends a week after tomorrow which is May 26th, which mean the last time you are voting is one the 2nd of June. And this time, NO prizes will be recommended for this event. This is due to a low stock on supplies for prizes. Remember, you can recommend prizes and vote for them! Thank you!”

*We’ll be back on the 16th… of June.*

*Vote for the last time before June 2nd: https://forms.gle/eWrgyxPxq39ouZvv7*

## Trivia

* The episode was released around teh 2019 Indy 500, which also involves racing