Let's Have a Kiki

The Strangers With Weapons try to gather all of the puzzle cubes and escape from the Yuan-Ti.

## Major Plot Points

* SWW were exploring the ancient Omuan castle when tentacles appeared out of the ground and walls. These tendrils wrapped around the party and dragged them through a narrow pink hole.
* The SWW arrived at the Salty Clam and were greeted by Clit Jones and her apprentice, Cordelia Bonum. The two explained that Bragga, Doc, Lance, Bada Bing, and Elle had been kidnapped after the grand reopening of their tavern.
* Fern investigated the bar and found several clues about the battle. Mostly that the damage to the bar was from the BFC’s usual weapons and spells of choice.
* After Fern discovered spilled liquid that didn’t match the Clam’s liquor selection or known bodily fluids, Sudsy tasted it and became paralyzed.
* Vulveeta accidentally found glowing footprints on the floor when trying to take a nap.
* Neuriel talked to the bioluminescent plant life that caused the glowing footprints and the plants said they came from a cave outside the city.
* The SWW went to the Council of Waterdeep with their evidence to see if they could help.
* The Council apologized for the actions of Niles Breakbone and his rogue Order of the Gauntlet party. They agreed to help and Vlad convinced them to seek out Queen Maxima to establish proper trade relations.
* The SWW went to a cave system that the Council gave them directions to.
* The party entered the cave and were quickly ambushed by Actual Cannibal Shia Labeouf.
* After defeating Shia, the party ventured further into the cave only to get a Shia Surprise! Voloth decapitated him after Shia’s second defeat.
* The SWW were then attacked by a troop of hobgoblins, two of their captains, and a warlord. After slaying these enemies, they freed Sunny Mac, a traveling merchant. He gifted the PCs with these magical items:
	+ Peggy took the peach colored lingerie. It provides the wearer with +2 AC, however, nothing can be worn over them to gain this effect. The lingerie does not count as armor.
	+ Fern grabbed the mood lipstick. The lipstick changes color depending on the wearer’s mood.
		- Blue for happy
		- Red for angry
		- Green for jealous
		- Purple for proud
		- Black for sad
		- Silver for horny
	+ Bigsby received air muffs. They give him resistance to cold damage, however, all he can hear while wearing them is the blaring of air horns.
	+ Vulveeta took the Lance Bass. When an enemy drops to 0 HP due to a strike from this lance, the enemy doesn’t die. Instead, it becomes a bass for 8 hours. The bass can breathe air as long as it’s not in a desert.
	+ Voloth received an old, immortal goose. The owner of the goose gets to roll a D6 and this determines what the bird shits that day.
		- 100 gold pieces
		- Literal shit
		- One ration worth of soup
		- A baby goose
		- A gallon of blood
		- One Greater Healing Potion
* As the SWW continued their descent into the caves, they came across four greasers guarding a door. One was Bill O’Reilly dressed as Sean Hannity cosplaying Ruth Bader Ginsburg.
* After taking down these guards, the heroes went through the doors and saw the BFC hanging above a lava pit in a steel cage.
* Jamna Gleamsilver was there with a mind flayer named Mindy and Drider named Zelrina.
* Zelrina attacked the party while Mindy telepathically tortured the BFC.
* Soon all three villains were brawling with the SWW as the BFC raged in their cage.
* Mindy stunned Calypso and Neuriel for most of the fight.
* Luckily, the other SWW members were able to slay the drider and mind flayer.
* Free of the mind flayer’s influence, the BFC broke out of their cage and ripped Jamna to shreds.
* The two heroic groups went back to the Salty Clam to celebrate their victory and Clit and Cordelia sent the SWW back to the Omuan castle.