Sodom and Gomorrah (GAM241)

Noah Lugeons

Eli Bosnick

***Sodom and Gomorrah*** (also known as ***The Last Days of Sodom and Gomorrah***) is a handful of Bible sentences that were turned into two hours and twenty-two minutes of movie. And if you're wondering how they managed that, it's easy (step by step): step one, make up two hours and twenty-one minutes of completely original story; step two, turn Lot's wife into a pillar of salt; step three, profit (I guess).

### **Opening Phrase**

Where each week we sample another selection from Christian cinema, so that we can remind *all* those quarantine folks that most people aren't with interacting worth in the first place.

### **How Bad Was It?**

Well, if you miss the bygone days when movies were little more than the longest possible distraction you could put in front of the masses, but goshdarn it if *Lawrence of Arabia* wasn't too gripping and fast-paced for your liking, you will *love* this movie. This movie is *Scientific Proof That Nostalgia is Based on Selective Memory: The Movie*.

### **Best Worst**

* Thomas: ...incest. [not the incest from the Bible story]
* Noah: ...x-rating.
* Eli: ...ah, 1962. [when you wanted to \*blank\*, all you had to do was \*blank\*]

### **Notes**

* Check out Thomas on *Opening Arguments*, *Serious Inquiries Only*, and *Philosophers in Space*.

### **Jokes**

* And I have to point this out, because it's my favorite moment in the entire goddam movie. He says something about the—they're still leaning into the whole salt thing—he says "You're destroying and monopolizing the greatest commodity in all of Africa!" Africa! They're *at* the Jordan River later. I know you *filmed* this in Africa, but that's not where the story takes place! [Thomas: I just love that he's fucking slaying this open mike. He's just… ’cause they're… this happens several times in the movie, where the director told the collection of extras from every which country (you know, you've got a guy with like an Italian "Hey, It's a me!"—every random accent you can get, and they're like...) "Here's the scene, extras, and horses, listen up: he's saying stuff and you think it's ridiculous." And the way they portray that is, he'll say like, "Oh, you guys are cynics!" "HA HA HA HA! OHO!" [Noah: Right! Right, but they're all just down at the Comedy Cellar!] They just laugh absurdly, and he's like "Oh yeah. Thank you, that's my time! Tip your camels everybody. Thank you." [Noah: So the guards show up. They're very upset, and they whip him to death: "It's Asia, you idiot! It's Asia!"] (23:16)
* This happens frequently in the Bible, in that because the actual version—insofar as there *is* any real story here—what happened was some guy told some bullshit that wasn't real, and some people went "Yeah, that's not fucking real, dude. I don't believe you." But in the Bible written version of it, they say "Well, and then fire and brimstone literally fucking came out of the Earth, and like a dragon" and all the shit that you obviously would see and believe, and then the people were still like "Nah, I don't believe it. I don't believe that that's happening right in front of me." (1:43:38)

### **Interstitials**

* First Ever Writer's Meeting (7:22)
* Sodomite Patrol (13:08) [Doodly-Doo]
* Sodomite Management Techniques (50:35)
* Hebrew Battle Plan (1:16:33)

### **Tropes**

* Awkward Kiss
* Christians Don't Know How the World Works
* Disappointing Christian Celebrity
* HOMOPHOBIA!
* Persecuted ~~Christians~~ Jews
* SEXISM!

### **Links**

* Episode on Audioboom
* Episode on YouTube
* Film on YouTube
* IMDB