Miss Fire

**Miss Fire** is the first episode of Season 8 of *Letterkenny*.

## Synopsis

The Hicks support Wayne. Reilly and Jonesy continue the hunt for the big ship. Stewart has made some changes.

## Cold Open

On the Jay & Dan show on TSN, Jay Onraite and Dan O'Toole discuss the upcoming Canadian Senior Hockey National Championship, in which teams from 9 provinces and 3 territories will compete for the cup. The only province not participating is Nova Scotia, which is under a ban for a drunken off-ice incident at an old folks home on family day. All eyes are on the Kerry County Eagles and its three stars from Letterkenny.

> Letterkenny…? About time something good came out of there. — Dan O'Toole
>
>

They cut to Kate Beirness and Tessa Bonhomme, who interview Reilly and Jonesy, who are uniformed as Eagles, and who try to downplay the absence of the third star—Shoresy. As they sip from cans of BroDude energy drink, they attribute their success to various pretentious clichés, although increasingly agitated by Shoresy's off-screen commentary.

> Jonesy, you are such a fucking labradoodle…. You are such a fucking puggle. — Shoresy
>
>

Jay then comments on retired NHL player Jean-Jacques Franois Jacques-Jean (JJ Frankie JJ), leading Quebec to victories over New Brunswick and Saskatchewan. At the mention of the latter, Dan asks about its capital, and the "Experience Regina" theme song begins playing.

## Plot Summary

During the donnybrook at the Salon d'Agriculture, Wayne throws one of the lumberjacks through a door, and all see Marie-Fred in the embrace of another man, visibly upsetting Wayne. Wayne is later seen retreating to the sled shack by himself.

Bonnie arrives at the produce stand and asks for him, and she and Katy riff about Marie-Fred being a whore, to Dan's dismay. Daryl asks if Bonnie still wants to go out, but she declines, seeing as Wayne is single again.

> Oh, bother. — Daryl
>
>

Wayne has secluded himself with booze and VHS tapes of his favorite show, *Miss Fire*, which is like Canada's *M\*A\*S\*H* "except way more homophobics." As Katy and Wayne were not allowed to watch TV growing up, they used to sneak to Uncle Eddie's, where it was always playing. Katy explains the premise of the show: a super-macho character, General Public, runs an army base of very effeminate male soldiers, among whom Private Sector is a particular annoyance to him. The titular Miss Fire is the general's secretary, who loves the soldiers, and admonishes him with the catchphrase "Excuse me, seriously, please and thank you?"

Katy and Bonnie recite other sitcom catchphrases, and Dan and Daryl contribute more quotes from *Miss Fire*. As Katy and Bonnie go off to run, Dan makes an observation.

> That shows did not age well. — Dan
>
>

Back at at the Kerry County Arena, Tanis scorns the Letterkenny players; "everyone and their dog is one-eighth native all of a sudden." The Native Coach attributes this to the genealogy website Ancestry.com. Tanis briefs the hockey players—specifically, Shoresy—in the toilet stalls, for the upcoming game against British Columbia: "a bunch of boat shoe-wearin' hemp hippies." Reilly complains that Shoresy gets all the credit, when he and Jonesy are the self-proclaimed chirp kings of the club. Shoresy chirps them into submission, before the Native Coach tells all three to be ready, because they are going.

At the sled shack. Wayne double-fists Gus N' Bru in his right hand and Puppers in his left while watching *Miss Fire*, while also smoking a dart.

Bonnie and Katy return to the farm from their run, and discuss with Daryl and Dan the need to get Wayne out of the shack—for two months, he has only emerged to chore and run the dogs. Daryl recalls a scene from the film *Homeward Bound* where the dog falls into a hole, and all emotionally recall that his companions went right down into the hole with him. Dan and Daryl run off to join Wayne, though not before stopping to fetch some Puppers first.

The TSN broadcast of the hockey tournament continues. Kate and Tessa comment on the chit-chat going on between the players, concluding that they must hate each other. Tanis, along with Axe, Shania, and Slash, are eager for the chirping to continue.

> Looking a little wobbly out there, stripes. These hippies giving you a contact high? — Native Coach
>
>

As play commences, Shoresy chirps the BC team with numerous pot references: "Thirty-two, hook me up with a quarter pound?" "Hey, who's got a reggae cigarette?" "I got a couple pre-rolls in my pants. Let's party!" As time runs out, Ontario has prevailed 8-0.

Back at the shack, Wayne has fallen asleep as *Miss Fire* plays in the background. Daryl and Dan sit outside silently, smoking and drinking uncomfortably through the dated dialogue.

Tanis addresses the hockey players (read: Shoresy) in the toilet stalls again. She informs him that some residents of Labrador wish to separate from Newfoundland, and further that a small but notable percentage of Newfoundlanders wish to separate from Canada, information which saddens Jonesy and Reilly.

Katy and Bonnie watch TSN coverage of the tournament at MoDean's. Reilly and Jonesy again give highly clichéd responses to Kate and Tessa's questions, this time with sniffling. Katy and Bonnie roll their eyes at the interview, and Katy remarks "if Wayne could hear this, he'd spit"—giving them an idea.

Two players from the Newfoundland and Labrador team, Tommy and Teddy, skate up to the Eagles. The Native Coach instructs the team to begin chirping, but the Newfies start up first and leave the entire lineup speechless and agitated.

> Bit mauzy on the rules, b'ys, but I'm told to play for the native team, well ya gotta be right native. — Teddy
>
>

As Daryl and Dan wait outside the sled shack, Katy and Bonnie approach with Reilly and Jonesy, who are explaining that they could not chirp the Newfies because they did not speak "Newfish," but beat them anyway. They then ask the boys to describe their game plan for the big final, just as if they were appearing on TSN. Reilly and Jonesy launch back into their recitation of pretentious sports clichés, getting louder and more excited with each beat.

Soon, Wayne bursts out of the sled shack, and he and Daryl begin mocking the hockey players for their interview answers.

> All this brotherhood talk's gotta stop when it's uncertain youse don't suck each other off. — Wayne
>
>

After unleashing on Reilly and Jonesy for several straight minutes, Wayne orders them off the property, and Bonnie tells Katy she thinks Wayne is back. But immediately afterward, Wayne goes back inside the shack and slams the door shut.

Aly and Bianca walk up to Stewart's mom's house and descend to the basement. There, all the Skids are engaged in various exercises, and a shirtless Stewart flexes, showing off a buffed physique.

## Quotes

* Bonnie: Where's Wayne?
Katy: Went into the bush like a wounded dog to die.
* Dan: At the risks of mansplaining feminisms to you, Professor Tricia always says womens is supposed to build each others up, not tears each others down.
Katy: "Women are supposed to build each other up, not tear each other down" is the new "I know you are, but what am I?"
* Tanis: I still can't believe these white swallows qualified to play for the Native team. Doesn't it piss you off that everyone and their dog is one-eighth native all of a sudden?
Native Coach: Ancestry.com, baby.
* Shoresy: Hey, you wanna talk about teamwork, Jonesy? I took your mom to Medieval Times and me and the Green Knight took her down after at Best Western.
* Shoresy: Fuck you, Reilly, I took your mom the next weekend. Me and the Blue Knight showed her a real sword fight.
* Shoresy: Fuck you, Jonesy, your mom got us banned from Canada's Wonderland for trying to give me a tug on Top Gun.
* Shoresy: Fuck you, Reilly, took your mom the weekend before and she asked me to diddle her on Drop Tower.
* Shoresy: Do you fire up some of that Jamaican broccoli between periods or what? Throw on some fucking Bob Marley, get pumped up?
* Native Coach: You fucking lost, 44? Let 'em have it, boys.
Barts: Hey, 1-4…
Both: B'ys, whudda y'at?
Teddy: Some cold out here, wha, Tommy?
Tommy: Oh, but she's right pretty, though.
Teddy: Knows, Tommy, knows.
Barts: Uh, Yorkie?
Yorkie: I'm gonna…
Tommy: Look at this skit, Teddy.
Teddy: That's the broadest skit I ever seen'r saw.
Tommy: Bit of a sook by the looka ya, too.
Teddy: Knows, Tommy, Knows.
Yorkie: Scholtzy.
Scholtzy: I'm gonna…
Tommy: You don't look just right native to me, b'y.
Teddy: Bit mauzy on the rules, b'ys, but I'm told to play for the native team, well ya gotta be right native.
Tommy: Where ya longs to?
Teddy: Yeah, who knit ya?
Scholtzy: Fisky.
Fisky: Shut the fuck up!
Tommy: B'y, you're some crooked today, aren't ya?
Teddy: Plain he's right rotted, Tommy.
Tommy: Fousty groupa CFA's, I'd say.
Teddy: Right fousty groupa Come From Aways there.
Tommy: Fucking knows, Teddy, knows.
Fisky: Boomtown!
Boomtown: I'm gonna beat the shit outta…
Tommy: Best go on in outta that talk, b'y.
Teddy: That talk'll have all hands crooked.
Tommy: You'll have all hands right rotted.
Teddy: S'be careful, b'y. I'll park ya broadside the boards.
Tommy: Teddy'll park ya rig handy.
Teddy: The b'ys all thought we;d have a time, Tommy, and here the arse has fallen right out of her.
Tommy: Sure, b'y. Just came by to say let's get on the go, but…
Teddy: Yeah, long may your big jib draw, and all that.
Tommy: If it's all hands you want, it's all hands you'll get.
Teddy: All hands throwin' hands, Tommy.
Tommy: Scrap a donny or what have ya.
Teddy: Knows, Tommy, knows.
Tommy: Fucking knows, Teddy.
Teddy: Whudda'ya say we go for a pint after the game anyway?
Tommy: Fire up a scoff, I'm gutfoundered. Scoffs till we're stogged, Teddy.
Teddy: But first, she's these skits.
Tommy: Yeah, first she's these sooks then we go on in out of it.
Teddy: Let's have a time.
Tommy: Fucking all hands.
Teddy: Let's get on the go.
Tommy: Fuck man, knows.
Teddy: B'ys, where d'ye go around here anyway for a good bread dinner?
Native Coach: Back to fucking Newfieland
Tommy: Oh, now, don't go mentioning home, now. Gives me the warm tinglies and all that.
Teddy: Gives me the warmest fuzzies it do, all this talk of Newfoundland.
Tommy: I'll have a tear broadside the eye for the effort.
Teddy: Parked a tear rig handy.
Tommy: Fuck, Teddy, knows.
Teddy: Best we goes on outta this conversation, Tommy.
Tommy: B'y, she's best we get on the go.
Teddy: B'y, find the slot, stay where you're to, I'll come where you're at.
Tommy: Knows, Teddy, knows.
Teddy: Let's get on the go.
Tommy: Long may your big jib draw, b'ys.
Native Coach: Holy fuck.
* Jonesy: And we don't know how to speak Newfish.
Reilly: But we'll learn because, you know, really, all Canadians should speak all three official languages.
* Wayne: You fucking fruit snackers.
Daryl: You fucking tea towelers.
Wayne: Squirrelly, go ahead and take a couple steps toward him. Don't be surprised if all of a sudden they got some place to be.
Daryl: Who put a nickel in you?
Wayne: You're a Dilly Bar, bud.
* Wayne: You know the TSN Turning Point?
Jonesy and Reilly: Yeah.
Wayne: Well, youse are TSN Turning Fucking Dumber.
Daryl: You're a bunch of fucking mis-plays.
Wayne: You're the Motrin Pain of the Day and the Pepto-Bismol Upset of the Week.
Daryl: Fucking novice.
Wayne: All this brotherhood talk's gotta stop when it's uncertain youse don't suck each other off.
Daryl: I think he'd give his flute a big hoot.
Daryl: A big old mouthful of bell end.
Wayne: You are so fucking 5′11″.
Daryl: You are a fucking anchor, bud.
Wayne: Get the fuck off the property.

## Callbacks and Running Gags

* Dan O'Toole's low opinion of Letterkenny (Great Day for Thunder Bay)
* The French Canadians all wear blue plaid lumberjack shirts (Bock et Biche)

## Cultural References

* The cliché responses athletes give to reporters after a game, as well as their sniffling, was previously lampooned in two Play Fun Games shorts featuring Jared Keeso and Dylan Playfair, Pro Hockey Media Relations 101 (2015) and Pro Hockey Media Relations 101- Lesson 2] (2016).
* "Experience Regina" is a mock tourism video and synth-wave song created by two Americans, identified only as Melody and Tim, who posted it to YouTube in 2008 (Regina Leader-Post). It went viral in 2013 when Jay Onrait and Dan O'Toole began playing it on their podcast. They also submitted it as their decade-defining song, poking fun at the "Spotify Wrapped" promotion, where users share their most-played songs of the decade (CTV News Regina).
* Daryl's catchphrase for disappointment, "Oh, bother," is borrowed from Winnie-the-Pooh.
* Tanis refers to the Letterkenny ringers as "white swallows," which may be a reference to a gay bathhouse of that name from "Butters' Very Own Episode" in the fifth season of South Park.
* Medieval Times Dinner and Tournament is a dinner theater performance featuring exhibitions modeled on medieval Europe, in which the audience is invited to cheer for one of six knights, each identified by a color. The Toronto location opened in 1993.
* Canada's Wonderland, north of Toronto, is Canada's most-visited seasonal amusement part. Shoresy's ride names are somewhat out of date, however; since 2007, "Top Gun" has been known as "Flight Deck" and "Drop Zone" has been known as "Drop Tower.
* Bubble hash is a concentrated form of marijuana made with an ice water filtering process.
* Pakalolo is a well-known Hawaiian cannabis seed bank.
* Newfoundland and Labrador did not join Canada until 1949, amidst a financial crisis, and secessionists base their grievances on broken promises with the federal and Quebec governments dating from that time.
* Newfoundland English has been recognized as a distinct dialect of English since the late 18th century. The Atlantic provinces were settled from the 17th century onward, but their isolation and relative homogeneity contributed to the development of grammatical and phonological features not found elsewhere in North America. According to the Dictionary of Newfoundland English, terms used in the chirp can be defined as follows:
	+ b'ys: a general greeting, short for "boys"
	+ crooked: ill-tempered
	+ fousty: musty, moldy, or foul-smelling
	+ gut-foundered: very hungry, famished
	+ long may your big jib draw: good luck
	+ mauzy: foggy or misty
	+ rig: any apparatus or device
	+ right: an intensifier meaning thoroughly or excessively
	+ rotted: finished
	+ scoff: an improvised late-night meal
	+ skit: a mosquito or biting fly
	+ sook: a babyish child, a calf or sheep
	+ stog: to stuff completely (as with food)
* The Newfie team name, "George Streeters," is a reference to George Street in St. John's, the capital of Newfoundland and Labrador, a two-block long strip of bars and pubs.
* "Bread dinner" is a simple meal of gravy on slices of bread.
* The 1993 Walt Disney film *Homeward Bound*, a remake of the 1963 Disney film *The Incredible Journey*, is like the earlier film based on the 1961 novel *Homeward Bound* by Scottish author Sheila Burnford, about three pets (two dogs and a cat) who journey through the Canadian wilderness to return home. Unlike the novel and 1963 film, however, the 1993 film is set in the Sierra Nevada rather than Ontario.
* A Dilly Bar is a dessert of dipped ice cream on a stick, sold by fast food chain Dairy Queen.
* The "TSN Turning Point" is a segment in TSN broadcasts highlighting a game-changing event. The "Motrin Pain of the Day" and "Pepto-Bismol Upset of the Week" are references to similar segments with corporate sponsorship.

## Trivia

* Fort Saint James, BC, where Reilly says he has family, is the real-life hometown of Dylan Playfair.
* Wayne's chirp that the hockey players are "so fucking 5′11″" is a reference to men who are insecure about not being 6 feet tall and try to puff themselves up to compensate. In reality, Andrew Herr is 5′11½″ (181cm) and Dylan Playfair is 5′9″ (175cm)

## Music

According to Tunefind, the following songs are featured in this episode:

* Experience Regina by the "Tourist Board of Saskatchewan"
* Honest by SSRIS (fight at the Salon d'Agriculture)
* Permanent Fixture by Tommy and the Commies (hockey game against British Columbia)
* One in a Billion by Taylor Knox
* Oxygen, Gemini Remix by Hadouken! (Skids' basement, end credits)

## Appearances

* Jay Onraite, Dan O'Toole, Kate Beirness, and Tessa Bonhomme as themselves
* Wayne
* Daryl
* Dan
* Marie-Fred
* "Blue Plaid Kisser" (Patrick Girard)
* Katy
* Bonnie McMurray
* Reilly
* Jonesy
* Native Coach
* Tanis
* Coach
* Axe
* Slash
* Shania (Ellyn Jade)
* Barts, Yorkie, Scholtzy, Fisky, and Boomtown
* Stewart
* Roald
* Connor
* Darien
* Aly (Sash Striga)
* Bianca (Nadine Bhabha)
* Tommy (Patrick Cook)
* Teddy (Terry Ryan)
* Miss Fire (Melody A. Johnson, voice)
* General Public (Mark Wilson, voice)
* Private Sector (Colin Doyle, voice)

## Locations

* TSN
* Salon d'Agriculture in Quebec
* Kerry County Arena
* Farm
* Sled Shack
* Basement

## Gallery

*→ See **24** images from Miss Fire at **Images from Miss Fire**.*
Tess and Kate interviewMarie-Fred-handedA squintBonnie in pinkKaty rolls her eyesGoing for a runMiss Fire on VHSDouble-fistingShoresy stretchesBrodude faceoffCheersChirping at BCDaryl and Dan at the shackCoach has a messageAt MoDean'sNewfies to the NativesTommy and TeddyFrustrated BoomtownKaty interviews ReillyBonnie interviews JonesyWayne leaves the shackHeading to the basementNewly yoked
## External Links

* Miss Fire at IMDb
* Miss Fire at the How Are Ya Now? podcast
* Miss Fire at The Produce Stand podcast