Character: Ben

Ben's first Minecraft skin.

### Death(s)

Slain by Anx as revenge for killing Cooper,Gave up a life to bring Dizzy back to life (as Pilot)

Ben Lacaille (full name *Benjamin Khorshīd Goldsmith-Lacaille*) is a character played by xoxo\_ben\_xoxo (Ben). He is the son of **Dizzy** and is generally seen as the catalyst for much of the lore of VoidSMP 1.

**CONTENT WARNINGS:** Death, Hospitals, Murder, Cannibalism, Discussions of Mental Health, Implied Suicidal Thoughts, Implied Addiction / Substance Abuse

## Pre-SMP

### Origins

Ben was not born in the traditional sense. Instead, he grew from the ground. Dizzy had been attacked by a zombie, which tore their arm off, and they buried it. From the buried arm, a baby appeared. This made Ben a human-demon hybrid, but he is thought of as "mostly" human, and ages like a human. It is somewhat evident that Dizzy was not expecting a child, but tried their best raising him. Ben is British because he was "grown in British soil".

### Childhood

For the first few years of his life, Ben was considered a normal, happy child. Dizzy would take him on trips to see **Tardi** and **Cooper**, though Ben doesn't remember this. Dizzy raised him in a small home and may have tried to home-school him for a while before sending him to a regular school.

When Ben was eight years old, he was chosen by a cultist group of dead souls (similar to "ghosts") called **The Collective** to be their "Host". This caused Ben to start seeing ghostly shadows in his daily life, which Dizzy assumed were imaginary friends. The Collective often presented Ben with horrifying nightmares and tried to possess him (though they failed each time). They tried to convince him to hurt other people, but Ben was determined to ignore them for as long as he could.

### Teenage Years

By the time Ben was sixteen, he had a girlfriend named Olivia. They got along very well and were starting to build a relationship, having met at school. At this time, Dizzy had allowed Ben to become more independent, often leaving him alone in their house for days at a time while they went out adventuring or visiting friends.

One day, while Dizzy was out, Ben invited Olivia to the house, thinking she might stay overnight. While they were talking in the kitchen, The Collective suddenly gained control over Ben's body, possessing him. They quickly forced him to grab a knife, and had him attack Olivia, cutting her throat and killing her. Soon afterwards, Ben regained control, and tried to save Olivia's life, but ultimately couldn't do anything. He panicked, the shock not allowing him to think rationally, and The Collective took advantage of this, instructing him on what to do with the body and how to hide the evidence. Additionally, The Collective suggested he should keep some of the body, but when Ben questioned them, they wouldn't give a full reason why. Eventually, he discovered they aimed to make him cannibalise the remains, which disgusted him, but once they gained control of his body for a second time, they fulfilled this goal.

After this, Ben was questioned by the police about Olivia's disappearance. He denied knowing anything, and passed a lie detector test with the help of a member of The Collective, **Abigail Merriweather**. He never told Dizzy what happened, too ashamed of himself to admit what he had done.

During school, Ben had been interested in becoming a chef, but after the cannibalism incident, he was put off. Instead, he focused on his second passion, English and poetry. When Ben was eighteen, about to graduate from school, he met Akaiya, a girl he quickly fell for. They graduated together, and began dating for some time.

Unfortunately, this relationship, too, did not end well. After being "fed", The Collective had grown slowly stronger, and gained the ability to use Ben as a gateway into the living world. One evening, Ben took Akaiya to a nice restaurant, and the night was going well. However, in the middle of the dinner, The Collective reached through Ben towards Akaiya, constricting themselves around her heart and causing her to have a spontaneous heart attack. Again, Ben tried to save her, but she died there.

While her body was in the morgue, The Collective took advantage of Ben's unstable mental state to possess him again, and they made him steal the body, using it to feed themselves later. Ben still refused to tell Dizzy what had happened, but Dizzy was beginning to grow worried for Ben, seeing that he was surrounded by death. Out of worry they contacted a powerful magic user who blessed Ben with some extra "lives", giving him three rather than one.

After struggling to get his poetry off the ground, Ben met a man named Sam, who he bonded well with. They dated for only a few months before Ben broke down, telling him everything about The Collective and the murders. Sam, thinking Ben must be either dangerous or delusional, contacted the police. However, Ben once again lied his way out of prosecution, and tried to apologise to Sam. This only caused Sam to panic, and he quickly fled the town along with his family. Ben never saw him again.

At this time, Dizzy decided to take Ben to a therapist, which became a weekly occurrence. Ben, however, did not like this system, and refused to work with the therapist, often lying and never telling her about The Collective. Eventually, he quit the sessions all together, telling Dizzy he was feeling better.

### Marriage

Skipping a previously-mentioned therapy session, Ben found himself stopping by a local shop to pass the time. In the checkout line, he bumped into a woman his age, **Elena**, who started to flirt with him. A little nervous and aware of his bad track record, Ben initially didn't reciprocate Elena's small talk, but soon he found himself in an easy conversation with her. She told him to meet her later outside the portal to another "World", her home "World", for dinner later that evening.

After the date, the two got to know each other very well, spending a lot of time together. Elena was from a "World" slightly different to the one Ben was raised in. It was more technologically advanced, economically divided, and had a wider pop-culture atmosphere, resembling the late 80s in the UK. They continued to go on dates here, and Ben grew attached to Elena and her home "World".

Both 20 years old, after only six months of dating, Elena proposed to Ben, asking him to move into an apartment with her. He agreed, and they told both their parents the news. Dizzy seemed apprehensive, worried that they were moving too fast, but attended the wedding regardless. It went well, and they moved in together in an apartment Elena's home "World". Dizzy left her home to start adventuring, writing to Ben occasionally to keep in contact.

To help pay the bills, Ben started working as a receptionist for a bank, leaving his passion for poetry as it didn't pay. Elena continued her job as a florist, often arriving home with new bunches of flowers for Ben. They worked hard, but made time for each other, spending most of their time together either cooking or doing each other's hair. The Collective seemed to get quieter and quieter, drowned out by domestic happiness.

### Elena's Death

After four and a half years of marriage, Elena suggested they should try for a baby. Ben agreed, but on the condition they move out of the small apartment and into a larger family home. They started to save up and look at houses, and in this time, Elena became pregnant. This did scare them both, but their joy overcame any worries they had.

Soon, though, Elena became very sick, and they had to go to a doctor. The doctor warned them that Elena had a genetic problem which put her at high risk during pregnancy, but Elena was determined to keep the baby, and after a short stay at the hospital, felt ready to continue working and go back home. Ben worried over her often, but respected her decision to keep the child. They both kept working and looking for a house, and Ben found one he felt was perfect: an out-of-town former farm house, with a pen and stables. Elena agreed the house looked perfect, especially as she one day wished to keep pet sheep.

One day, however, Elena's health became suddenly worse. Ben received the message while he was at work that Elena had been rushed to the hospital, and he immediately headed there himself. He pushed past doctors to get to Elena's room, even hitting one who wouldn't let him pass. When he got to her side, she was unconscious, so he just knelt next to the bed and held her hand. Soon after he arrived, she passed away.

## Move to VoidSMP

### The Apartment Years

Two years passed. Ben stayed in the apartment, The Collective back but going mostly ignored due to his depressive state. He quit his job, using the money he and Elena had saved up to survive, and he barely went outside after the funeral. Dizzy continued to write to him, but he never wrote back, leaving them unaware of his loss. Without time outside or a healthy diet, Ben "wilted" somewhat, and became weaker.

Dizzy's letters stopped arriving for some months, until one day one was posted to the apartment. Ben read it, discovering Dizzy had moved to a new "World" called VoidSMP, and that he and Elena should visit soon. Spurred by a sudden feeling of guilt, Ben decided to pack up his things and move.

### Entering VoidSMP

**NOTE:** The early VoidSMP storyline was quite joke-heavy, whereas later the story became more serious.

When Ben entered VoidSMP, he was greeted by **Cooper**, who ran the **'Catmaid Cafe'** in **Spawn Village**. Ben was shown around the server by **Anx**, and met some other characters such as **Astro**, **Bo**, and **Frosted**. He didn't try to seek out Dizzy, knowing he would find them eventually.

However, upon meeting so many people and being around others for the first time in years, Ben suddenly became paranoid, over-aware of The Collective's whispered threats of possession and constant pressure from them to hurt other people. He felt as though his only choice now, to keep others safe, was to have himself locked away somewhere, where he couldn't hurt anyone.

## The Catmaid War

### Declaration of War

In an impulse decision, while hanging out with Anx at the Catmaid Cafe, Ben declared a 'War' between himself and the Cafe. This was, according to him, meant to be a war of "wit, cunning, and epic tricks" rather than an actual battle. Anx told Cooper about the declaration, and everyone began to prepare for the day. Most players chose to side with the Catmaid cafe, unsure of why Ben would be against them.

### Finding a Home

In the meantime, Ben travelled out of Spawn Village and into the wilderness, eventually finding a stone plateau biome and empty cave which he quickly set up a base inside. It overlooked the ocean, and there was a hole in the back of the cave which dropped down into the sea. Here, Ben began to prepare for the war, mostly writing in his **journal**.

### Leading up to the War:

As the war approached, several groups started to ally with Ben. Some remained neutral, such as **Pango**. Ben stole Cooper's pet fish, dweam, as an act of war, and then made a second fish as a copy.

#### The Anti-Catmaid-Alliance

The Anti Catmaid Alliance was formed after Astro approached Ben in secret, offering to join his side. Anx was quick to join too in support, and Frosted also joined the group. They were under the impression that the war was going to be quite light-hearted and more of a joke than anything else, but still played up the idea of spying on Cooper, pretending to be on the Catmaid's side to gather information. Anx accepted payment for their assistance, and created some banners and shields for the group. Frosted helped the group by providing their **Bunker** which would be used to hold the war. The plan was to force the Catmaids into the Bunker space in order to throw them off, and to dramatically reveal the traitors.

Ben gave the copy dweam fish to Anx as some kind of leverage, and gave the original fish to Dizzy in their first proper conversation on the server.

#### Mantist Joins the Team

Soon after the declaration of war, businesswoman **Mantist** approached Ben with an offer of ally-ship. Ben agreed to let her mine on his land in exchange for help during the war. However, this angered **Bo**, Mantist's fiancee, who was on the Catmaids' side. Bo broke up with Mantist because of this.

Mantist left Ben with some stacks of TNT, which Ben was unsure if he would use in the war.

#### Meeting Chorus

Before the war, Ben received a note from a mysterious stranger, telling him to travel to certain coordinates at a specific time. When he arrived, he was greeted by **Chorus**, an Elytrian who wanted to know more about the war. Once Ben explained, Chorus seemed apprehensive, but when Ben eluded to his partner, Chorus empathised, having lost someone herself. She agreed to help Ben in the form of pushing the Catmaid Alliance towards Frosted's Bunker on the day of the war.

It was revealed soon afterwards that Chorus was Anx and Astro's parent (adoptive). Additionally, Ben almost lost his alliance with Chorus by threatening her in a note (a move orchestrated by The Collective) but the alliance ultimately stayed.

### The Day of the War

Just before the war, Ben wrote a note to Cooper informing him of the plans, an act of self-sabotage. He did not name Anx or Astro, however.

On the day of the war, everyone was prepared for any eventuality, but Cooper insisted on not bringing any weapons with him. He made a speech to his allies, noting how he knew there were traitors in the group, but did not care, and still saw everyone as his friends. After the speech, everyone headed outside the cafe and waited for Ben to arrive.

Suddenly, arrows began raining from the sky, and Chorus appeared, using her wings to fly above the group while shooting at them, ordering them to move. She chased everyone away from the village and towards Pango's Castle, where Cooper told everyone to stay behind while he went to find Ben. Astro and Anx protested, but while everyone was arguing, Cooper slipped away, letting Chorus chase him towards Frosted's bunker, which he knew was the plan due to Ben's self-sabotaging note.

### The Confrontation

Once Cooper got to the Bunker, he tried to reason with Ben, telling him he was open to discussion, but Ben started acting strange. Soon, the others (Anx, Astro, Dizzy, and Bo) arrived, much to Cooper's dismay, and a chaotic argument broke out, during which Ben revealed he had brought a sword. Anx and Astro tried to reveal themselves as traitors, but Ben quickly shut them down, telling everyone to leave the Bunker so he could talk to Cooper. Initially, everyone refused, but Chorus arrived and threatened everyone with a bow and arrow, so they left. Cooper gave Anx a flower and promised he would be fine.

Once alone, Cooper tried to reason with Ben, letting him know whatever was wrong could be dealt with. Ben played up his chosen character here, acting aggressive, but this persona was soon overcome by panic. As Ben's emotions heightened, he eluded to Elena's passing and Cooper tried once more to offer help. Unfortunately, this did not help, as Ben could feel The Collective growing stronger and louder around him, and he wanted to be locked in the Bunker so he couldn't hurt anyone. This did not come across well in his frantic argument with Cooper.

As Cooper attempted to reach out to Ben, The Collective took over, causing Ben to draw his sword and stab Cooper. The sword was enchanted with fire aspect, and thus Cooper burnt to a crisp.

The full VOD of the Day of the War can be found *here*

**NOTE:** The original war had some differences to the official lore which was pieced together more fully later on. As the players were improvising and had no set script to follow, some elements of the original VOD may not align perfectly with the official lore detailed above.

## Post-War

### Immediate Aftermath - Loss of First Life

After Cooper died, Bo and Anx rushed into the Bunker, discovering the aftermath of the scene. Filled with anger, Anx attacked Ben with an axe, killing him and taking his first canon life. Bo calmed Anx down after this, warning them not to attack Ben again. Ben, being the worst, tried to bait Anx (13 years old) into taking his other lives, but Anx refrained. Still insisting on being treated badly for his crimes, Ben asked Bo to lock him in the Bunker, leaving him to rot. Bo refused, but said it could act as a warden of sorts, with the Bunker as a temporary prison. Eventually, Ben agreed, and Anx left to tell the others what had happened.

### Staying in the Bunker:

After making the warden deal with Bo, Dizzy came to visit Ben. This confrontation went badly, with Ben asking Dizzy who they had left now Cooper was gone. Dizzy was hurt by Ben's hostility, but told him they still love him. Later, Dizzy would find a note from Ben explaining Elena's death.

Ben stayed in the Bunker for around two weeks, being visited a few times by Bo. He had a bed, a little farm, and eventually a small pond, which Bo built. He wrote correspondence with Bo, mostly asking to be treated worse, which Bo refused to do. Close to the end of Ben's stay in the Bunker, Bo took Ben outside, to visit Cooper's grave and explain to him its plan to build a therapy village. This place would be a safe area with housing and a sense of community, but with walls and entry requirements so Ben would not be at risk of hurting anyone. Ben seemed apprehensive about the idea.

#### Deals with Mantist

While inside the Bunker, Mantist visited Ben, eager to continue the alliance they had formed before the war. She initially tried to hire Ben as a hitman, interested in his murderous tendencies, but Ben refused this, telling her he never wanted to hurt anyone again. He also explained that he couldn't help it when he lashed out, feeling worse and worse when around other people until eventually snapping. Mantist told him she would be back another time and left him alone.

A week or so later, Mantist returned, this time offering the same job but phrased differently. She referred to Ben as an 'attack dog' and dehumanised him, which caused The Collective to become active. The Collective had been trying for a long time to cut down Ben's self-esteem, often dehumanising him themselves to try to get him to give up his body and allow them to possess him forever. This meant that any kind of dehumanising language became a sort of trigger, which caused Ben to dissociate. When Mantist used that language against Ben, he was triggered, and eventually became confused and panicked enough that he agreed to Mantist's deal. He was then officially a Mantis Inc employee, but Mantist herself allowed Ben to stay in the Bunker for as long as he wanted, promising him a new house to live in when / if he emerged.

#### Meeting Grey

Content to waste away in the Bunker, Ben had no desire to leave. However, his solitude was interrupted by **Grey**, a new character with horns similar to Cooper's and a bright, chipper disposition. Grey broke into the Bunker one day, chaotically introducing himself to Ben. During this interaction, Grey mentioned that he 'could read, but didn't want to', and therefore couldn't read Ben's journal or letters to Bo. When Ben asked why Grey came to find him, Grey responded by saying his brain just told him to do so. Grey then convinced Ben to leave the Bunker and go adventuring back to Grey's farm.

During the journey, Ben stopped by his cave to pick up some supplies, then stopped at Chorus' house to write her a letter. He asked Chorus if he could live with her, assuming the rest of the server might be as hostile towards him as Anx. Then, he followed Grey into the forest, where they discussed a few topics. Ben explained his tendency to hurt people, and Grey mentioned that he had only been alive for a few weeks. Ben put two and two together, and realised Grey was some kind of reincarnation of Cooper.

When they reached Grey's farm, Grey invited Ben to stay and become a roommate. Ben refused, but took up a guest room in Grey's house, and confirmed that they could be friends. After spending the night, Ben left, despite Grey's protests.

### Confrontation at the Cave House

When Ben went back to the cave house to collect the rest of his items, he found Bo and Anx there. Sneaking up on them, he discovered that Anx was trying to steal from him, while Bo attempted to stop them. Ben announced his presence, annoyed, and confronted Bo and Anx. Anx immediately tried to attack him, which Ben didn't discourage, but Bo stopped them. They got into a debate about killing Ben, which Ben decided he wasn't actually on board for.

While Bo was defending Ben, trying to explain that he is a mortal, unlike Anx and Bo, and would die forever if he lost all his lives, Ben hid in the library room of his cave, which had a convenient hole in the back which led to a sharp drop into the sea. Panicking slightly, Ben escaped by jumping into the sea, not hearing Anx's agreement with Bo and admission that they were feeling guilty about taking one of Ben's lives.

Ben grabbed a boat and sailed away from the cave house, finding his way to Chorus' house despite not receiving a response from her yet.

### Living with Chorus

Fortunately, Chorus allowed Ben to stay with her, clearing out some space in her silo for Ben to live. She congratulated him on his 'first kill', despite her former friendship with Cooper, as it was tradition in her World for "pups" (younger members of her species) to come of age with their first kill. Ben did not like this, but appreciated her hospitality nonetheless. He helped on Chorus' small farm, and she showed him the large **Library** project she was working on. Chorus even entrusted Ben with some knowledge about her backstory, and told him that calling her 'Corporal' would cause her to revert to a subservient mind state.

Soon, however, Ben started to feel uneasy, The Collective returning with promises of betrayal and murder. Chorus reassured Ben that if he ever tried to hurt her, she would easily defend herself, but he disagreed, not knowing how powerful The Collective could potentially become. He did not tell her about The Collective, but insisted that he was dangerous, and should probably leave.

Before this, there was an incident where Ben seemed to dissociate, making his way back to the Bunker and walking into the two-block deep pond. Chorus found him and dragged him from the pond before he could drown, and Ben broke out of his trance. He could not explain much, but commented that he felt very cold constantly, and he was unstable. Chorus comforted him, and found herself viewing Ben as a son-figure. They went back to Chorus' house, and for a few days, things were good again.

Ben knew he had to leave, or felt he must, so the peace did not last long. He gathered his things, and left Chorus a note telling her not to try to find him. With that, he ventured away from Chorus' house and into the forest.

### Living Alone

In a small clearing, Ben found an abandoned **Farmhouse** which he decided to live in. For some time, he was happy to be left alone, despite the isolation making The Collective's presence more obvious. Chorus occasionally visited without him noticing, leaving gifts in his mailbox. Ben built some farms around the house, and started gathering pet dogs. He named these dogs after various cannibals.

Additionally, Ben built a graveyard next to his house, and put graves for some pets there as well as one for Cooper. He also built a stable for his horses and a pen for his llamas.

### Mantist's Plan

Soon, Mantist contacted Ben, and they met to discuss Ben's role at Mantis Inc. Mantist explained her goal to destroy the server's peaceful community and create a capitalistic system in its place. Her focus at the time was farming, and finding ways to automate different types of farming for maximum profits. She aimed to kill anyone who got in her way, and needed Ben's help for this. Initially, he disagreed, but Mantist quickly changed his mind by claiming the other people on the server likely hate him for killing Cooper, and then further manipulating him using his trigger words.

### Dizzy's Death

After talking to Ben, Mantist went to Dizzy, and tried to get them to join Mantis Inc as well. When Dizzy refused, Mantist implied she would hurt Ben, causing an 'accident'. Dizzy reluctantly changed their mind, and was set to become an employee.

Still unstable after his conversation with Mantist, Ben felt suddenly weak, and The Collective possessed his body. Instead of their usual, short possession period, this one lingered. They took Ben to Dizzy's house, just after Mantist left, and got him to tell Dizzy to follow him. They led Dizzy to Ben's house, and to the attic (which doubled as Ben's bedroom). There, The Collective killed Dizzy with the same sword they had killed Cooper with.

Having seen Dizzy and Ben going to Ben's house, Chorus had followed, and entered the scene just moments too late. Ben came back to his senses and made Chorus take the sword away, telling her not to let him have it again. Chorus agreed, and left soon afterwards.

Ben then went back to Spawn Village, trying to find someone who could help. He stumbled across Astro, and at first couldn't explain what had happened. When he finally admitted to killing Dizzy, Astro left briefly to kill some squids (something they only did in very stressful situations) and returned seemingly unfazed, which upset Ben. Astro reacted strangely because they can access the afterlife, and see death differently to other characters, but they were still upset about Dizzy's death.

### The Phizzy Saga

While Ben was talking to Astro, Grey showed up with a ghost following him. **Phizzy**, Dizzy's ghost. They looked like Dizzy, but with grey skin and hair. This was an awkward experience for Ben, but everyone else seemed happy. Phizzy did not remember how they had died, so Ben took the opportunity to lie, saying he also didn't know. Astro backed up the lie, saying to Phizzy that while Ben was their son, he was from another dimension, and 'their' Ben was on holiday, having swapped places. To give Ben some time, but not enable him, Astro said 'their' Ben would be back in a week.

During the chaos, Anx came to visit Astro. Feeling guilty, Ben told Anx what had happened, to which Anx told him to stay away from them. Ben once more asked if killing him would make Anx feel better, but Anx became frustrated, telling him that taking his first life was a mistake. They also told him that if he truly regretted killing Cooper, he wouldn't have killed again, and they never wanted to see him again.

On his way home, Ben found Chorus. Instead of being proud of him, this time Chorus said she was disappointed, but not angry. Ben broke down, and tried to explain The Collective to Chorus, not going into detail but conveying the idea that what happened wasn't his fault. He told her about how scared he felt, that he was afraid to hurt other people, even Chorus herself. To this, Chorus produced a solution. She gave Ben some weakness potions, and told him to take them if he felt he might get possessed, so that even if The Collective were controlling him, he wouldn't be physically strong enough to hurt anyone. Ben took the potions, and thanked Chorus, before going home and creating a grave for Dizzy.

After this, Mantist called Ben and Phizzy to Mantis Inc. to discuss business plans. Phizzy was confused and asked Mantist what was going on, to which she lied that Phizzy was an employee and worked for her. Ben tried to argue against this and tell Phizzy the truth, to save them from Mantist's manipulation, but Mantist stopped him, implying she would tell Phizzy the truth about their death if Ben defied her. Reluctantly, Ben agreed to stay quiet.

At the same time, Ben mentioned to Mantist that he felt like a terrible person, and suggested he deserved the poor treatment he received from Mantist. Mantist actually protested this, claiming Ben was useful and therefore good. Ben didn't agree, but they didn't argue about it. They then left Mantist Inc.

Throughout the week, Phizzy kept visiting Ben, looking to remember more about their life and death. Another factor causing these visits was **Mors**, a demon who had formed a pact with Dizzy, and was looking to make Phizzy take revenge, killing Ben and stealing his soul. Phizzy never did this, but often woke up outside Ben's farmhouse wearing armour and holding a sword.

During a visit, Ben started to feel The Collective getting louder, and decided to use a weakness potion. He blacked out, and instead of being possessed by the entire Collective, he was possessed by just one member, a drag artist named **Beaky**. Beaky started talking to Phizzy, immediately telling them the truth about what Ben had done, and started to mock the ghost. Once Ben recovered, Phizzy quickly left, confused and remembering too many things at once.

In the night, Phizzy returned, stole a weakness potion, and used it. It caused them to forget Beaky's words, much to Mors' dismay.

When Phizzy next visited Ben, they asked how people deal with having bad memories, as they were struggling to remember them. Ben explained that without bad memories, there can be no good memories, and went on to recount a day at the beach he had shared with Elena in the past. However, the moment was short-lived, and Ben started to feel The Collective trying to possess him again, so he quickly took another weakness potion. This time, another individual from The Collective possessed him, **Abigail Merriweather**.

Abigail was kinder than Beaky, talking to Dizzy with a cheerful attitude and relating to them as best she could. When she explained the truth, she did so in a more gentle way, which allowed Phizzy to recover their memories and remember what Ben had done. Abigail seemed happy to talk badly of Ben, and told Phizzy that she liked Dizzy because they hurt Ben with their unconditional love. This confused Phizzy, but Ben had returned before they could ask Abigail any more questions.

Knowing his lie had been uncovered, Ben apologised to Phizzy, and Phizzy- now equipped with Dizzy's memories- told him it was okay. They explained that a long time ago, they had also hurt someone they loved, and Ben commented it must run in the family. After this comment, Phizzy left.

### Various Visits:

#### Astro's Gift

After a long expedition in the ocean, Astro came across dry land, and decided to live there. Coincidentally, this land was next to Ben's farmhouse, and Astro quickly discovered their new neighbour. As a friendly gift, Astro left Ben a zombie horse called ORSE!!!, a mooshroom, a cake, and a totem of undying. Ben was surprised by this, unaware that Astro still saw him as a friend.

#### Confessing to Chorus

Ben was also visited by Chorus a few times, to drop off more weakness potions (which he had started to become dependent on). During one visit, Chorus asked about Ben's past with The Collective. He didn't explain much, only telling Chorus to look up the names of his dogs in her library. He also told her about the deaths of his first two girlfriends. Chorus went on to research the dogs' names, and was uncharacteristically disturbed by what she found. She wrote in her diary that she had never committed cannibalism, and this was new territory for her.

#### Meeting Rae

One day, Ben received a letter from a stranger called **Rae**, who explained they had been living on the land next to the farmhouse, and didn't realise it belonged to someone. Ben went to visit the small campsite, and talked to Rae, who explained they were visually impaired, and would move as soon as possible. Ben told them no one owns the land and they could stay, to which Rae protested, but eventually agreed. They told Ben they were now in debt to him, and would help him when he needed.

Later, Rae explained they were looking for their friend, **Sapphic**, who had come into the server's World with them, but had gone missing since then. Ben said he would keep a look out, but was generally too pre-occupied with his own feelings to interact with Rae any more.

Pilot's Minecraft Skin

## Pilot

Weakened by the potions and feeling at his lowest, Ben was starting to be overwhelmed by The Collective. His guilt was eating at him, and the world felt too loud, making it hard for him to concentrate on his usual distraction- writing. In a hazy attempt at getting control of his life back, Ben mentally retreated, leaving his conscious body and moving his mind into the *Mindspace*, something he had never done before. His body was left without anyone to control it, which made it possible for The Collective to possess it permanently. Before they could, however, someone else took Ben's place.

### Introducing Pilot

This new character was Pilot, though he called himself simply 'Vessel' for a while. He was meant to exist only as a basic replacement for a full person, something that could keep the body alive while Ben was in the Mindspace. However, Pilot very quickly began developing a personality of his own, and retained a few of Ben's memories, making it easier for him to connect to the world around him, which he regarded with awe. He was happy to exist at all, and was determined to make the most of it.

Pilot obviously looked like Ben, but seemed less tired and more youthful, and had Ben's natural white hair rather than it being dyed blue. Pilot cut his hair very short, and wore different clothes to Ben, opting for a more casual, darker palette. His voice was higher and more airy, making him sound younger, too, contrasting with his often blunt and quite harsh way of speaking.

One of the first things Pilot did was send out a letter to everyone on the server. He introduced himself and wrote down the coordinates of the farmhouse. In his first few days, he enjoyed working on the farms, content to busy himself with tasks.

### Pilots Relationships:

#### Phizzy / Dizzy - Loss of Second Life

In Pilot's early days, he was bound to certain rules which were leftover from when Ben was in control. One of these was to obey orders / instructions, a habit Ben had fallen into while working for Mantist. When Pilot met Phizzy, he was initially hostile, with quite a blunt way of speaking, telling them to leave him alone and let him work on the farms. However, when Phizzy said they wished they could be brought back to life, Pilot's instructions kicked in.

Calling Chorus, he convinced her to give him Ben's sword back by calling her 'Corporal', and he gave Phizzy the totem of undying to hold. In one quick move, Pilot stabbed Phizzy, and the process of *Revival* began. Instantly, Phizzy was gone, and Dizzy had returned, alive. Pilot had given one of Ben's lives for this, leaving Ben with only one life left.

After this, Pilot had a brief confrontation with Mors, as he tried to argue that lives should cost more than just one sacrifice. Pilot spoke plainly and told him that wasn't true and Revival is a law of equal exchange. Dizzy seemed to appreciate this. They told Pilot they were on their way to kill Mantist for her mistreatment of their ghost, but Pilot stopped them, threatening to kill them again if they hurt Mantist. This ultimately came to nothing, however, and Dizzy left without further conflict.

Dizzy later returned with Astro, arriving to talk to Pilot. In this instance, Pilot was not in a great mood, and started arguing with Astro about whether to bring Ben back or not. After this conflict reached its end, Dizzy tried to comfort / scold Pilot, but was met with even more anger.

Pilot, afraid of Ben returning (therefore killing him, as he would no longer exist) and angry that he wasn't being seen as his own person, decided to burn Ben's journal in front of Dizzy. Dizzy was horrified by this behaviour, and left.

#### Chorus

When Pilot met Chorus properly, it was in response to his introduction note. Chorus thought he had stolen Ben's house, and had come to force Pilot out. She approached with a terrifying attitude, but soon calmed down when she realised what was really going on. She scolded Pilot for using 'Corporal' against her, but offered to help him in any way she could.

They took a walk together, and Pilot explained some of the things he had learnt during his brief time in the world. He expressed his happiness that he hadn't met any bad people and that everyone seemed nice, but Chorus shut this down, commenting "you will", before leaving Pilot to his own business.

#### Astro

As mentioned, Pilot and Astro didn't meet on the best of terms. Astro had been flying around the farmhouse when Pilot found them, and quickly started talking about bringing Ben back, which made Pilot uncomfortable. Despite Pilot's insistence that he and Ben couldn't exist in the physical realm at the same time, Astro didn't give the topic up.

After pushing the argument for too long, Pilot snapped, telling Astro that they are a "bad person". Pilot had been introduced to the concept of bad people by Chorus, and had a very binary view of good and bad at this point due to his lack of life experience. After this, Astro stopped and left, once again to kill some squids.

#### Rae

Due to their poor vision, Rae initially mistook Pilot for Ben, and greeted him as such. Pilot explained who he was, and Rae seemed to take this well, easily accepting the situation. This made Pilot feel at ease, and the two had a conversation about the server, with Pilot using his limited memories to fill in the gaps in Rae's knowledge. Rae once again asked if Pilot had seen Sapphic, but Pilot hadn't. He suggested that Mantist might be able to help, with her knowledge of the server and greater workforce. Pilot assumed Mantist was a good person, because that was how she registered in his memories. Rae took the information, and set off to find Mantist.

#### Tardi

In response to one of Pilot's letters. **Tardi**, resident and creator of **Gingerville**, sent Pilot a note. She greeted Pilot and explained some of the residents of Gingerville to him. Pilot soon responded, and the two became pen pals, sending each other letters. Tardi gave Pilot two sweaters (grey and red) and some berries as gifts, and Pilot returned the favour by delivering some gifts to Tardi. The two were going to meet up in person, but were never able to.

#### Pango

For a short time, Pango visited Pilot. The two discussed events on the server, and Pilot mentioned how he felt weak from the weakness potions he had become dependent on. Pango offered Pilot some god potions, which he accepted happily, and wished him luck with his new life.

#### Bo

Bo wrote a letter back to Pilot upon finding his introduction letter, asking him to visit it at Mantis Inc. Pilot did so, happy to meet a new friend, and found Bo at its pumpkin patch. Bo listened to Pilot's story, and was also glad to make a new friend, but truly called Pilot over to warn him. It explained that Mantist shouldn't be trusted, and despite having gotten back together with her, it knew her employees weren't treated fairly. Bo didn't outright admit Mantist was a bad person, however, only trying to keep Pilot from agreeing to any deals with her.

#### Mantist

During Bo and Pilot's conversation, Mantist arrived, and Bo quickly stopped talking about the topic. Mantist immediatly told Pilot he belonged to her as an employee, and expressed her disappointment at the loss of his second life. She claimed Pilot was valuable, and should therefore stay at home, where he would be safe and his last life would be protected. Unbeknownst to Pilot, her plan was to auction off his final life later.

Bo didn't argue with Mantist, but suggested it should guard Pilot's house if he were to be trapped there. Mantist agreed that they would take turns. During one of Mantist's visits, she threatened Pilot, telling him he must stay inside because he belonged to her. Pilot became angry and threatened to bring Ben back, claiming he would kill Mantist, but Mantist was unfazed, laughing and using some of Ben's trigger words against Pilot.

In their final interaction, Bo and Mantist were guarding the house together, and Bo tried to allow Pilot out of his attic bedroom, where Mantist had blocked him in using obsidian. This resulted in an argument breaking out between Bo and Mantist, and they eventually left the house to continue the debate.

## The Bunker

Once Pilot was alone in the farmhouse, Chorus came to visit him. She made sure he was okay, and told him to follow her to her house to get away from Mantist. Pilot agreed, and started walking with Chorus gladly. He began to ramble about his life, and Chorus mostly just listened, fighting off mobs on the way.

Little did Pilot know, Chorus had been sent a letter from Ben, who had managed to somewhat control the body while Pilot was asleep. The note had told Chorus to demoralise Pilot somehow, because he wasn't a "real" person and was keeping Ben from returning to his own body. Chorus didn't appreciate the tone Ben took with her, as he had tried to call her 'Corporal' again in the letter, but wanted him to return and knew a non-violent way of getting Pilot to give up.

When they arrived at Chorus' house, she showed Pilot her Library, and the new **Bunker** she had built. Its original purpose was to keep her loved ones safe in case of an emergency scenario, but she offered it to Pilot as a safe place to stay. As Pilot had been trapped in his house before, he didn't find the Bunker appealing, and refused the offer. However, while his back was turned, Chorus had left the Bunker and closed the door, trapping Pilot inside. She later took his armour and tools, and brought his dogs and cats to the Bunker too.

### Trapped

While Pilot was trapped in the Bunker, he spent a lot of time farming and caring for the few sheep and cows Chorus had left for him. In several instructive books located around the Bunker, Chorus addressed him as Ben, and explained how to work different parts of the underground prison. He could receive letters from the outside, but rarely did, and couldn't keep in contact with Tardi anymore. There were storage chests, a kitchen, a study and bedroom.

He bonded with some individuals in The Collective, as they were kinder to him than they had been to Ben. Throughout his stay, Pilot tried to figure out his purpose, and began to understand people as more complex than simply 'good' and 'bad'. He eventually only wished for his freedom, happy that he got to live at all and wanting to see the world.

In his dreams, Pilot would sometimes see Ben in the Mindspace, but was unable (or unwilling) to talk to him. Occasionally, he would also dream about Elena and a life Ben had wanted to share with her. Pilot was confused by these dreams, not understanding who Elena was or why he was seemingly sharing some of Ben's dreams.

### Trying to Escape

At one point, Pilot seemed to snap and he killed his pet sheep. Chorus came to replace the animal, and was jumped by Pilot, who proceeded to stab her. She was greatly unaffected by this, though, and actually praised Pilot for growing a spine. Pilot did not achieve freedom as he had hoped.

### Conversations:

#### Dizzy

When Dizzy went to speak with Pilot, they didn't seem too angry about his previous outburst, but they weren't happy with him either. Still, they apologised for their argument, and told him he didn't deserve to be trapped. Pilot asked Dizzy to free him, but they refused to do so. Pilot spoke bitterly to Dizzy after this, and told them to leave him alone. Dizzy did so, but left the occasional note for Pilot and delivered an Anti-Catmaid-Alliance banner to him, which he put on the wall in the study.

#### Pango

Pango visited Pilot once, teleporting inside the Bunker to evade Chorus. They asked Pilot if there were any red tulips in the Bunker, to which he said no, and they had a brief conversation. However, before Pilot could ask to be freed from the Bunker, Pango spotted the Anti-Catmaid-Alliance banner on the wall, and started to panic, remembering the war and Cooper's death, which they felt they could have prevented. Seeing Pilot again, Pango could only see Ben's face, and panicked more, teleporting out of the Bunker.

#### Ben

In one of Pilot's dreams, he found Ben, and spoke to him from outside the Mindspace. Ben had come to terms with Pilot's existence by this point, and admitted he shouldn't have contacted Chorus. Ben told Pilot he would stop trying to get the body back, and allow Pilot as much time as he needed to live. Pilot accepted this, and apologised for burning Ben's journal.

Later, they met again, and Ben told Pilot about a conversation he had managed to have with Dizzy, where Dizzy had implied they would be okay with Pilot dying if it meant Ben could return. Pilot was shocked by this, and thanked Ben for telling him.

#### Dizzy 2

The next time Pilot spoke to Dizzy, he confronted them about what they said to Ben. Dizzy was surprised that Ben had told Pilot, and felt guilty about the conversation, accepting the criticism from Pilot. In the end, Pilot told Dizzy to leave him alone and not come back, to which Dizzy agreed,

### Freedom & Reset

One day, Pilot woke up to find the Bunker had been opened, and Chorus had left a note for him. It explained that she had gone to "Return" and would not be coming back. The note showed no animosity towards Pilot, and so Pilot accepted it and realised he was free. He took his belongings and left the bunker, heading into the Library and towards the exit.

However, the moment Pilot was about to step outside, the world went white, and everything disappeared. The server had reset. His story would continue as a background piece in the world of **VoidSMP 2**.

## The Mindspace

The Mindspace is a plane of existence every player has which is individual to them. Through unprecedented outside forces (such as two souls sharing one body, or interference from ghosts) a player can take their soul into the Mindspace and live there rather than their physical body, leaving it defenceless. Usually, a "blank" soul will take residence in the body, controlling it temporarily to keep it alive but not being a full person.

### Entering the Mindspace

After the death of Dizzy and his subsequent confession to Phizzy about the murder, Ben found himself more haunted by his actions than ever. The Collective tormented him, and his misuse of weakness potions made him halfway delirious. At a certain point, he became so tired and frustrated that he simply gave in, wishing for a safe place away from both The Collective and his own actions. This manifested in the transferring of his soul to the Mindspace, as the walls between the physical plane and his Mindspace plane had been worn down over years due to The Collective's influence.

After this, Ben's abandoned body was controlled by Pilot, who almost instantly went against his predetermined role and developed his own personality and emotions, rather than simply keeping the body alive.

Ben woke up in his Mindspace, which was fashioned after an 80s-style apartment. It contained a bedroom/study, living space, and bathroom, but no kitchen. The curtains were closed and there was a front door. The living space contained a couch and a box television which only played static. The study area had several bookshelves and an unlimited amount of paper and pens, giving Ben freedom to pursue his writing passions.

### Realisations

For the first few weeks, Ben enjoyed his time in the Mindspace, using it to write poetry relax. However, individual members of The Collective started to visit him, either to talk down to him or offer simple conversation, which annoyed Ben. This was also how he found out about Pilot, a revelation which made Ben anxious to return to his body. Caring about his legacy and autonomy, he rushed to the front door of the apartment, only to find the exit covered with a brick wall upon opening the door.

More checking, and Ben found the windows were also covered by bricks, which caused him to panic. He made a connection with Abigail Merriweather and asked her some questions about Pilot, which she offered answers to, before telling Ben that time was passing differently between VoidSMP and the Mindspace.

The conversion rate was roughly 1:15, meaning every one day that passed on VoidSMP was 15 days in the Mindspace. This only disheartened Ben further, as he felt like his wish for more time had been cruelly twisted.

### Letters to Chorus

In his frustration, Ben took a note from Abigail about how minds were easier to possess when asleep. With this knowledge, Ben managed to briefly possess Pilot's sleeping form and write out a letter to Chorus, asking her to take Pilot away. He requested that she did not kill Pilot, but demoralise him in some way until he gave up the body. This resulted in Chorus' use of the Bunker on Pilot.

### Continuation of the Horrors

Time passed slowly in the Mindspace, each day blander than the next. Without much interaction with the outside world, Ben began to talk to himself, using a cassette player/recorder he found to keep track of his days. His thoughts developed over time, moving between self-hatred to anger at Pilot, then towards thoughts of legacy and his poetry. Towards the end of his stay, he had started to heal, and turned his attention towards writing again, mostly love poems.

In the meantime, Ben began to break down the brick wall with his fists, the injuries not lasting nor causing him pain as he had no reason to feel in the Mindspace. However, as the wall was broken down, revealing a bright white hallway ahead, Ben started to feel more and more pain, and other sensations such as hunger. This became a problem, as he had no kitchen, but could also not starve to death, leaving him perpetually starving for weeks before his body started to give out on him.

The progression on the wall ceased, and Ben knew he had to do something. In a final desperate effort, he hacked off his own leg (with a sharpened trowel) and ate it. This gave him a tiny amount of energy back, and he continued working on the wall.

In total, Ben was in the Mindspace for 2,850 days (7.8 years), 190 days on VoidSMP, making him roughly 35 years old in the Mindspace.

### Confrontation with Mors

After Ben cut off his own leg, he was visited by Mors, Dizzy's demon. Mors was quite put off by the whole thing, and offered Ben food. While Ben was cautious of Mors' generosity, he accepted the offer, and Mors said he could call on him in a time of need. Ben did not like this arrangement.

### Conversation with Pilot

Eventually, once the wall had been nearly broken down completely, Ben was faced with Pilot, standing on the other side, who was asleep on VoidSMP. The two discussed their animosities towards each other, and eventually came to a mutual agreement. Pilot would be allowed to live his remaining days however he pleased, and once he was ready, he would give Ben his body back. Ben was sympathetic towards Pilot's entrapment, and told him to live life as much as possible.

### Confrontation with Dizzy

With Mors' help, Dizzy visited Ben in his Mindspace, wishing to talk to their son. Ben was immediately hostile towards Dizzy, not appreciating their treatment of Pilot nor the pity they offered him. He hadn't had a proper conversation for years, so a lot of his words were harsh and spontaneous, but they still held weight to them. When Dizzy suggested Ben take back his body by force, killing Pilot, Ben told them to leave. This was their last conversation before the sever reset. Ben told Pilot about Dizzy's words the next night.

### Acceptance

In his last few days, Ben relaxed again, accepting his stay in the Mindspace until Pilot was ready to let the body go. He wrote poetry and non-fiction works about his life and Elena's story, and he made sure Pilot was okay when he could by accessing his perspective through the television in the Mindspace.

## The Collective

### Origins

The Collective formed in the earliest civilisation, born from a cultist who wanted to live forever. She is named as The First One, and is the one who recruits new souls into The Collective.