Brian Harold Griffin

***Brian Harold Griffin*** is an 8-year old talking white Labrador who has lived with the Griffin family since Peter picked him up as a stray as shown in "Brian: Portrait of a Dog". He also possesses various anthropomorphic qualities, such as the ability to speak intelligently, drive a car, and walk bipedally. In "I Never Met the Dead Man", "Jerome Is the New Black", and in the afterparty of *Stewie Griffin: The Untold Story*, he used the phrase "Whose leg do you have to hump to get a dry martini around here?", which has become a recurring mantra for him, despite only using it three times. He also has a particularly sharp wit. Peter is his best friend, despite Brian's vastly superior intelligence. On several occasions, Brian has had to explain Peter's inability to do various things, such as haggling over prices in "Chitty Chitty Death Bang". In "Brian Goes Back to College", it is revealed that Brian went to Brown University in Rhode Island, but did not graduate. **Brian has a cultured background; he loves opera and jazz, and is a fan of John Coltrane. Brian speaks fluent French and Tagalog, and is competent in Spanish. He is also a member of MENSA. He loves to sing and can imitate a barbershop quartet without accompaniment. He is also an avid writer, having once been invited to write for *The New Yorker*, although he was fired once the magazine learned he did not graduate from college. He has also written a novel, although has made little progress other than the title *Faster Than the Speed of Love*, and a synopsis similar to the film "Iron Eagle III", for which Stewie and Lois mock him, and this subject has since been brought up several times throughout the series. He is a smoker, an alcoholic and recovered cocaine addict. Brian discovered that his cocaine habit stemmed from his mother abandoning him for which he saw a therapist. He has also made references to either buying, being in possession of, or smoking marijuana in numerous episodes. In "420", he actually does a whole dance to the song A Bag of Weed. In "It Takes a Village Idiot, and I Married One", it is revealed he has a Ziggy tattoo. It is shown in "Brian & Stewie" that he keeps a gun just in case he wants to commit suicide.**

## Biography

#### Birthplace and parents

Brian was born on a farm in Austin, Texas, in a litter of five puppies. His mother was named Biscuit, his father was a dog named Coco. He was apparently abandoned by his mother, which lead to most of his personal problems. In "Don't Make Me Over", he is embarrassed for hostility barking at a famous rapper and blamed his upbringing by his father Coco. At the end of the episode he becomes enraged because he is thinks that the camera man is shocked because he turned off a black TV program and explains that he only turns it off because he's tired and not because it's a black show. He is said to be 8 years old in "The Man with Two Brians".
When reunited with his first owner in "Road to Rhode Island".. In the same episode, he discovers that his mother died and was made into a table. Brian and Stewie steal the body and give it a funeral, for which Stewie made a good-intentioned but insensitive requiem of how nice of a table she was.

#### Past adult life

In addition to having attended Brown University, Brian had also served in the Peace Corps in "Jungle Love". He has also mentioned that he hung out with Andy Warhol in "A Picture's Worth a Thousand Bucks".

#### Griffin family

In "Brian in Love", Brian suffers from incontinence due the stress of repressing his romantic feelings toward Lois. He initially tries to hide this condition by blaming it on Stewie, but is discovered when he has a public accident in the grocery store.

Another example of Brian's "humanity" is his attraction to human women; Brian has dated several since the show began, and is deeply in love with Peter's wife.

His age is usually treated differently depending on the joke. In "Brian in Love", he states: "I'm seven years old and if I play my cards right, I got seven more years ahead of me." Brian spent some time as a homeless stray washing car windshields for change before he met Peter, who offered him a home with his family in Quahog, Rhode Island.

Prior to Brian, the Griffins had another talking dog named Todd, who was put down at the age of 15 due to illness.

#### Other notes

Despite his anthropomorphic intelligence, Brian shares certain traits and shortcomings with real dogs. For example, he cleans himself with his tongue and scratches at fleas with his hind leg.

In "Bill and Peter's Bogus Journey", it is revealed that Brian is not potty trained but rather defecates outside like other dogs. Tired of stepping in his feces, Lois forces him to wear diapers, which he finds extremely humiliating. Amused, Stewie says that he looks "silly" in his diapers but tells him that it won't be so bad once he gets used to them. Brian eventually gets out of diapers by simply defecating in Mayor West's garden instead, leading Lois to think he is potty-trained.

Brian seems somewhat ashamed of his dog instincts and insecure about his canine status in general. In "Brian: Portrait of a Dog", he refused to perform degrading pet tricks for Peter during a dog show, despite it being necessary to win the money needed to buy the family a new air conditioner. He also chastised Lady and the Tramp for acting in typical dog-like behavior, saying that "that's just what they want you to do." He suffers mistreatment as a dog, and is humiliated when the Griffins catch him with canine pornography.

In "Brian & Stewie", he admits to Stewie that he can't find a purpose in his life, and keeps a gun in his safety deposit box in case he ever decides to commit suicide. "Dog Gone" however, cements how important Brian is to the Griffin family, and makes him realize that his existence has meaning to them.

This was revealed where he is seen at the library and he is looking for *The God Delusion* by avowed humanist Richard Dawkins. His atheism comes under attack in "Not All Dogs Go To Heaven" when he comes out to the Griffins about his belief or lack of, and Meg, in a drastic effort to convert Brian to Christianity, makes his atheism public knowledge, making him a social outcast until near the end of the episode.

## Notes

* This is the only character for which Seth MacFarlane uses his natural speaking voice, as opposed to the voice changes for other characters such as Peter Griffin, Glenn Quagmire, and Stewie Griffin.
* In "Brian: Portrait of a Dog", it's revealed that Brian became a Griffin during his adulthood, when Peter offered him a home with his family in Quahog, but in "The Man with Two Brians", Brian shows the family videos of him as a puppy, already living in the Griffin's house. "Short Cuts" returns to his story of being adopted, but adds that he left his friend Shredder behind at a park where they lived.
	+ In revenge for being left behind, Shredder tries to trick Brian into getting neutered and succeeds in costing him one of his testicles. However, in "Blind Ambition", Brian was already neutered and forced to wear a cone to keep from chewing his stitches out.
* He drives a silver 2004 Toyota Prius. The license plate reads "BRI-D0G" and it has a 'Kucinich 04' bumper sticker.
* Brian was the first *Family Guy* character to appear in an episode *American Dad!*. He appears in "The People vs. Martin Sugar", where Stan names his top ten fictional dogs, and Brian is named number one. He is seen drinking a martini on the courthouse steps, and claims Stan does not exist. Stan berates him for the claim.
* The DVD commentary for "Brian Griffin's House of Payne" explains that the "H" in "H. Brian Griffin" does not stand for anything and was a way to express Brian as a pretentious douche.
* Brian reveals in "Brian & Stewie" that he voted for John McCain.
* Brian's catchphrase is "Whose leg do I have to hump to get a martini around here?" which originated in "I Never Met the Dead Man". This was varied three times later in the series in regards to different things.
	+ O'Brian the sheep first uses a variation for a pint of Guinness in "Peter's Two Dads".
	+ New Brian for a hug in "The Man with Two Brians".
	+ Vinny for an Amaretto Disaronno in "Christmas Guy", though he replaces "hump" with "gagoosh".
* Following his death in "Life of Brian", Brian is not even mentioned in "In Harmony's Way". He also does not appear in "Candy Quahog Marshmallow!".
* It is revealed in "The D in Apartment 23", that Brian's Twitter account name is "@d0gbackwards", which is an actual account assigned to Brian since October of 2016.