The Tragic Tale of Methhead!Jake

## The Lore

The beginning of this truly depressing and sorrowful story begins on Earth C, a few years after the Sburb/Sgrub debacle. Jake had gone to an underground casino, where a strange, mysterious man offered him some methamphetamine. After this experience Jake got hooked on the drug.

He ended up wasting away most of his wealth, to the point of going bankrupt, just to obtain it. His wife even left him, according to Jake. No one knows who his wife was or if she was even real. Out of money and sanity, driven by his intense need for meth, he turned to mugging the wealthiest people he knew. His friends.

It first started with politely asking for a loan, but eventually it came to him pulling out pistols on his closest friends. They begged him to get help, Jane pestering him directly trying to empower him to rise above his crippling addiction. Alas, these attempts failed. One fateful day, his ecto-daughter Jade talked to him, trying to reason with him. She pushed him too far, and already being unstable mentally, Jake shot her in the foot. Jake ran off in horror of what he had done. Jade then made her way out onto the streets, where she would bleed out and die a heroic death.

Roxy found out about Jade's death while trying to loot a pizza shop to give to the poor, as an attempt to be Robin Hood and as revenge for the owner calling her a whore. She told Jake of this soon after, one of the final straws for his deteriorating mental health. Jake immediately had a breakdown and turned to meth once again, falling further into his addiction.

Jane pestered him, and in a moment of insanity, Jake violently confessed to Jane. Pulling out his pistol and threatening Jane so she wouldn't do anything, he sought out John hoping he would retcon this train wreck of a timeline. When throwing out empty excuses to cover up fails, Jake once again returns to violence and threatens John. This fails spectacularly, John does the windy thing and leaves to go and contact Jane. While Jake was distracted, Jane had contacted Roxy and informed her of what he had done.

Jake begs for Roxy's forgiveness, wanting her to help him get everything retconned. His emotional display didn't sway her though, so he reached for the pistols. Jake shot Roxy to death, her final words being a request to tell John (her husband) and her mommy that she loves them. From there Jake ran for it, not looking back.

From here the devastation comes to a close. Rose approaches Jake in the street, having been on the sidelines throughout all of this. After drawing their weapons western style, Rose cuts through Jake's heart with a simple spell. He is dead instantly, quite obviously ruled just.

All who were lost, avenged.

## Trivia

* Jake is able to interact with all of his friends physically while in different locations due to mysterious powers gained through his meth consumption! Not a plot hole in the slightest.
* Jake stashes meth in all of his friend's houses for easy access.
* This actually all started when the term "pogchap" was discovered, thus prompting CL to pull strings and get OL on the Dirk handle JUST to have Jake call him his little pogchap. After this CL also pestered OL on the John handle and then proceeded to mug him, all the while calling him pogchap. This led to the narrative of Jake mugging his friends for meth money, leading to this expansive lore.
* On that note, it is important to know that pogchap is methhead!Jake's favorite term of endearment.