Those Ruby High Heels Will Be Mine!

Glorija: Now I have the fishing rod, and I'm in the balloon! Now all I have to do is raise up a house, *then* release it onto Ilena! \*raises a random house with a fishing rod, then drops it onto Ilena, who is walking past\*

Ilena: Oof! \*dies after being crushed by a falling house\*

Glorija: Perfect! \*jumps out of the balloon and takes the red high heels off Ilena's feet\* Now I have those shoes! \*puts them on\* I feel sleepy... \*goes to sleep on a bench\*

Glorija: Prissy, I have a feeling we're not in Hartlania City anymore. Wait, was that your name?

Alina: WELCOME TO LUNCHKINLAND GLORIJA I SEE THAT YOU HAVE ROBBED THE CORPSE OF ILENA CONGRATULATIONS ON KILLING HER

Lunchkin: we thank you very swee-

Naomi: WHERE'S MY BFF?!

Glorija: i, uh, kinda...dropped a house on her?

Naomi: YOU DESERVE DEATH!

Alina: oh shut up or else I'll destroy your cellphone

Naomi: \*shooketh\* OH NO, PLEASE DON'T! \*cries\* BYE GLORIJA BUT I'LL BE BACK SOON

Glorija: ok

Naomi: I'LL GET YOU MY PRETTY AND YOUR BOA CONSTRICTOR TOO

Alina: byeeeeeee 👋🏻

Lunchkins: FOLLOW THE PEE COVERED ROAD

[at the intersection]

Glorija: which way do i go now?

Nina: \*points right\* you could go that way \*points left\* but the other way works too

Glorija: uhh i need ONE answer. are you playin' a prank or can't you make up your mind?

Nina: i don't even have a mind to make up so...

Glorija: don't worry, the wizard of oz will get you a brain

Nina: to oz?

Glorija: TO OZ!

[in the forest]

Glorija: is im hungry i need an apple \*plucks an apple off a tree\*

Tina: bitch that's MY stuff so don’t you fuckin dare eat it \*pelts glorija and nina with apples\*

Glorija: wait a minute nina, i see a teenage girl, a tin girl!

Zoë: OIL CAN

Glorija: Oil can?

Glorija and Nina: WHAT THE HELL?!

Zoë: oil can

Glorija: ok \*oils Zoe's face\*

Zoë: oh much better but you only oiled my face oil me everywhere please

Glorija: \*oils the rest of Zoe's body\* is this good enough

Zoë: oh just perfect i've been holding that phone up forever

Glorija: why, great!

Zoë: i ain’t got a heart, i'm not evil, i just don't have one because i'm made of tin

Tina: why?

Zoë: NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS ASK ME THAT AGAIN AND I'LL WHACK YOU WITH MY PHONE

Glorija and Tina: NO HEART?!

Zoë: No heart - only tin. And as long as I have no heart, I can never love my lunchkin laddie. \*cries\* I used to carve his name into every tree!

Glorija and Tina: so anyway we can bring you to oz where you'll get a heart

Zoë: sure!

[on the pee covered road]

Glorija, Tina and Zoë: OOOOOOOOO-[slips]-OZ!

Glorija: Will we meet any wild animals?

Zoë: We might, but mostly lions and tigers and bears.

Glorija: Lions?

Tina: And tigers?

Zoë: And bears?

Glorija: OH CRAP!

All: Lions and tigers and bears,

Glorija: Oh crap!

All: Lions and tigers and bears,

Glorija: Oh crap!

All: Lions and tigers and bears,

Glorija: Oh craaaaap!

Slađana: AAAAAAAAA A BOA CONSTRICTOR \*runs around like a deranged lunatic\*

Glorija: It's okay, he's my pet, and he won't hurt you.

Slađana: OK BUT I'M STILL SCARED

Tina: But you're a lion!

Zoë: Man up, sis!

Slađana: I CANT BECAUSE I AINT GOT NO COURAGE

Glorija, Tina and Zoë: We can bring you to the Wizard of Oz where you'll get courage!

Slađana: THAT SOUNDS SCARY

Glorija: Don't worry, it won't be scary.

[in the girls' toilets]

Naomi: So! You won't take warning, eh? All the worse for you, then. I'll take care of you now instead of later! Hah! When I gain those ruby slippers, my power will be the greatest in Oz! And now, my beauties! Something with poison in it, I think. With poison in it, but attractive to the eye - and soothing to the smell! Poppies! Poppies! Poppies!

[in the poppy field]

Luna: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Tina: What's up with *her?*

Slađana: Just a deranged lunatic...

Luna: DAMN RIGHT I AIN'T GOT NO SANITY

Zoë: Well, *that* explains a lot...

Luna: You see, I was in a bus crash when I was 3, and it mucked up my brain a LOT.

Glorija: Well, the Wizard of Oz will give you some sanity!

Luna: Excellent! \*runs around, extremely hyper\*

Glorija: I feel *soooooooooooo* sleepy... \*falls asleep\*

Tina: You can't go to sleep *now!*

Slađana: I'm sleepy too... \*falls asleep\*

Luna: Me too! \*falls asleep and sings\* I'm a pretty maideeeeeeeenn!

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