Candle Baby/Transcript

(The episode starts with the Spammers in their lair, playing Nario Kart 8 Supreme.)

Whickey: Ladies first! (Allows his kart to be overtaken by Kitchen.)

Kitchen: Oh, you!

Gyux: Asdcvuyg6t7re8idskcmvn! (Subtitles: Must you ALWAYS flirt with Whickey, sister?)

Kitchen: Yes, yes I must.

Secretky: You will not win, and if I don’t want you to win, you won’t win! (His kart is in 12th place.)

Whickey: Sure.

(Maps chuckles and uses the konami code on her controller, and this makes her kart giant and she starts crushing all the other racers.)

Luis: No fair. It still isn’t too.

Ivan: I won’t let you get away like that! (Kart zooms up to second place.)

Maps: Gah! (Maps’ character throws an exploding turtle at Ivan, and his kart is thrown back and off the track.)

(Secretky uses a mystery box and turns into a giant missile. He flies up to second place and pierces Maps’ giant tires, the air gushes out like a balloon, Maps is also thrown off track.)

Secretky: Cheaters never win!

(Kitchen throws a banana peel under Secretky’s wheel, and he gets slowed down.)

Secretky: Dang it!

(Books are thrown in front of Whickey and Kitchen, their edges facing the top.)

Whickey: Kitchen, watch out! (In slow-motion, he bumps Kitchen’s kart out of the direction of the edges. Whickey takes the hit and his wheels are pierced.)

Kitchen: I’ll avenge you, Whickey!

(Another exploding turtle bounces along the tracks and hits Kitchen.)

Book: Haha! (Looks up at the track.) I’m almost at the final lap finish line!

(Book gets ambushed by a wave of numbers and letters. Gyux passes Book’s kart and laughs.)

Gyux: Abifufyd667! Abifufyd667! (Subtitles: I’m gonna make it, I’m gonna make it!)

(Flame’s engine soars through the race and he wins.)

Flame: Woo hoo!

Gyux; W1a na2ma3! (Subtitles: Aw man!)

(A “Finish!” sign is seen, the scores appear on the screen.)

Maps: I was so close!

Kitchen: At least we didn’t lose!

Ivan: Who did lose?

(The Spammers look at the leaderboard.)

Ivan: Oh, just some computers. Baby Nario, heh!

Whickey: Baby? Ha! Who allowed a baby in the choices?

Kitchen: Yeah, why even was there a baby version of Nario?

Book: Well for whatever reason they’re there, they’re weak!

Maps: That gives me an idea…

(Cue theme song. The scene cuts to someone knocking on Candle Man’s bedroom door.)

Candle Man: Come in!

(Mystic opens the door.)

Mystic: Hey, Candle Man. Judy and Ribbon told me about this new smoothie trend in the Omega Galaxy, eggplants and berries. I was wondering if I could borrow a eggplant so I can join in on the fun?

Candle Man: Only if you let me have some too.

Mystic: Deal. Hey, what are you doing?

Candle Man: Me? Oh, Baghead told me he found an old phone with recordings of me and my family in a deep dark cupboard. No cringe. (Plays a video. It’s of a young Candle Man tucked in bed, his mother sitting on the edge singing a lullaby to him) Before I could control my powers, I used to be scared of the dark. My mom told me this lullaby and every time she sang it to me I just felt at peace.

Mystic: Wow, this said it was recorded at 1am!

Candle Man: Yep…

Mystic: Your mother must’ve been really kind to be up at 1am to sing you a lullaby.

Candle Man: Well, you already know what happened with us and them after that…

Mystic: Don’t even remind me.

(Another knock at Candle Man’s door is heard.)

Candle Man: Come in!

(Shaduck enters.)

Shaduck: Ey, Candle Man. I went outside for my daily walk with Rachel and I saw this sale with some weird people in hats covering their faces and coats too long for me to see their hands selling exclusive eggplants and guess what, it was free!

Candle Man: Now that’s not something you hear everyday.

Shaduck: So here! (Throws the eggplant at Candle Man, he catches it with his mouth and takes a bite of it.)

Candle Man: Eggplants! Yum yum! (His head shrinks.)

(Mystic and Shaduck scream.)

Candle Man: Huh?

Shaduck: Your head….

Mystic: It just shrunk!

Candle Man: What do you mean guys? (His arms shrink.)

Mystic: Now your arms!

Candle Man: I have no idea what you’re talking about. (Legs shrink.)

Shaduck: Spit out that eggplant! NOW!

Candle Man: (Vision is blurred.) But...but it’s yummy…(Faints with a thud.)

Mystic: What th- Did he just pass out right in front of us?

Shaduck: You know what this means right?

Mystic: Yeah, you’re so stupid that you would buy some eggplant from randos off the street!

Shaduck: I meant, this has Spammers written all over it.

Mystic: Oh yeah, that too.

(Candle Man starts wailing.)

Mystic: Huh. He wasn’t unconscious for that lo- (She turns to see Candle Man, who has turned into a toddler.) OH GOD!

Young Candle Man: Stranger! (Runs out his room scared and bumps into Limefong.)

Limefong: I’m…not even going to ask.

Young Candle Man: Doggy! (Clings onto Limefong’s tail.)

Limefong: Gah! Get it off!

Young Candle Man: Good boy. I’m going to call you Choco!

(Mystic and Shaduck run out of Candle Man’s room.)

Limefong: Let me guess. Spammers?

(Mystic and Shaduck nod.)

Limefong: Alright, let’s go then-

Young Candle Man: I love my pet Choco! (Puts a belt around Limefong’s neck which he mistakes for a collar.) Now you won’t get lost! Come on, Choco. Let’s go on a walk! (Ties a rope to the belt and pulls on Limefong, he falls over and Candle Man drags him along.)

Limefong: Wait…wait…WAIT!

(Candle Man pulls Limefong out of the door)

Mystic: Better go after him.

(The scene cuts to Candle Man dragging Limefong along the streets.)

Young Candle Man: Let’s go to the park, Choco! I bet you’ll have a lot of friends there. (Drags Limefong to the park.) Let’s play some games!

Limefong: No, thanks. I’ve already lost a big portion of my dignity as it is.

(Young Candle Man searches the park. He sees several sticks.)

Young Candle Man: Pff, my dog is too good for sticks! He needs… (A frisbee lands in front of him.) A frisbee, perfect!

Danny: Hey, that was my frisbee!

Young Candle Man: Just let me borrow it for my perfect little angel dog, he deserves it!

Danny: But it’s mine!

Young Candle Man: No! (Picks up the frisbee and throws it away.) Fetch!

(Limefong stays still.)

Young Candle Man: Come on! (Kicks Limefong’s butt.)

Limefong: OWOWOWOWOW! (Limefong runs after the frisbee.)

Young Candle Man: Yay!

(The scene cuts to the Spammers looking through the window.)

Whickey: Yep, they’re all gone! Let’s wreck their house!

(The Spammers enter the Candle Friends’ house. They all grab something belonging to the Main 4.)

Maps: I got the mouse!

Kitchen: I got the grilled cheese maker!

Ivanmaste: I got the...roll of pictures…(Ivanmaste opens up the roll. Many pictures of Dewey Duck are seen.) Uh…well this is awkward.

Secretky: I got the gaming console!

Whickey: Then let’s trash the house and make a run for it!

(The Spammers knock over tables, throw cushions around and kick lamps before they leave. The scene cuts to Mr. and Mrs. Candle and Candle Girl who are taking a walk in Wikia.)

Mrs. Candle: Who knew that Wikia could be so beautiful?

Mr. Candle: Yeah! I can see why our son likes staying here.

(Danny runs up to Mrs. Candle.)

Mrs. Candle: Why hello there, little fella!

Danny: Hello, lady. Can you help me? A boy stole my frisbee I was playing with!

Mrs. Candle: Oh dear. Could you show me where he is?

Danny: Yeah, follow me! (Runs off.)

Mr. Candle: Dear, do we really need to be doing this right now?

Mrs. Candle: Oh, don’t be a grump. Botuczy can wait for now, he doesn’t even know we’re coming!

(The scene then shows Limefong running back to Candle Man and giving him the frisbee.)

Young Candle Man: Good, Choco!

Danny: Here, here he is!

Mr. Candle: Alright kid, please return the frisbee to the young boy.

(Candle Man turns around and looks at his parents and Candle Girl.)

Young Candle Man: But I like it! Wait, mommy? Daddy?

Mr and Mrs. Candle: SON!?

Candle Girl: You’re a…baby? Yay, now I’m older than you! Haha!

Young Candle Man: Pick me up, mommy! Pick me up! Pick me up!

Mrs. Candle: But how did you get so small?

Young Candle Man: I’m not small! I’m a big boy!

Mr. Candle: I bet this has something to do with that girlfriend of his!

Candle Girl: (Looks at Mr. Candle.) We’ve been over that already! (To herself.) I never really saw any flaws in their relationship anyway… well, except the age gap, but still.

(The parents run away with Candle Man in his hands.)

Young Candle Man: Wait, Choco!

Limefong: Finally! (Rips the collar off.)

Danny: But my frisbee!

(Mrs. Candle takes the frisbee out of Candle Man’s hand and throws it back towards Danny.)

Danny: Thanks! (Frisbee hits his head and he falls over.)

Candle Man: BUT WHY?! It’s supposed to be mine! Mine! Exclusively mine!

Mrs. Candle: Come on, Candle Man. We’re going to your house.

(The Candle Friends walk away, then Mystic and Shaduck run into the park.)

Shaduck: Aaaand he’s gone.

Mystic: (Her voice going louder each word.) I NEED TO CALM DOWN, I’M NOT GOING INSANE, NOPE, I’M COMPLETELY FINE!

Shaduck: GET THIS GIRL A CUP OF DECAF! SHE NEEDS TO CALM DOWN.

(Mystic screams, her breakdown at its worst state. Cuts to Candle Man walking clumsily across the street. Mr. and Mrs. Candle and Candle Girl notice it.)

Mr. Candle: What happened to you?

Candle Girl: So that is how he looked like when he was 3 years old? 2 years before I WAS EVEN BORN! BWHAHA, NOW I’M THE OLDER SIBLING!!!

Candle Man: But I want to be the older sibling!

(Candle Man cries like George Pig. The Candle Friends comes to next to them on the street. Mystic’s hair in a mess, as she is clearly struggling. Her eyes are a pale yellow, singling her high amounts of stress and crippling anxiety.)

George Pig: (Walking by.) WHY ARE YOU COPYING THE WAY I CRY!?

Shaduck: Shush! Go find a muddy puddle and stop being a pain in the ears!

George Pig: But you don’t have ear-

(Shaduck shoves George Pig away into a muddy puddle)

George: I love muddy puddles!

(George laughs while jumping in the muddy puddle. Scene cuts back to Candle Man and the others.)

Mrs. Candle: So what happened to him?

Shaduck: He turned into a baby!

Mr. Candle: Yeah, but how?

Mystic: He was stupid and gave Candle Man an eggplant from a sketchy person!

(Candle Man jumps out of Mrs. Candle’s arms. He bumps into the wall and falls over. He starts crying.)

Mrs. Candle: My baby!

(Mrs. Candle picks up Candle Man and rocks him in her arms.)

Mrs. Candle: Sleepy eyes, sleepy town. Everybody just lay down. Close your eyes, breathe in deep, ‘till the whole world’s asleep.

(Candle Man sleeps peacefully while quietly snoring, the same as his original snoring but more high pitched.)

Mr. Candle: We need to get him back to his normal size!

Mrs. Candle: And age!

Candle Girl: WAIT, NO! THAT WOULD MAKE HIM THE OLDER SIBLING AGAIN! DON’T DO IT!

(Candle Man wakes up due to Candle Girl’s yelling, and starts to cry again like George Pig.)

Mystic: I really need to find a way to cope with all of this stress...

Mr. Candle: It doesn’t matter! We need to get him back ASAP!

(Candle Man jumps out of Mrs. Candle’s arms, and starts joyfully and clumsily toddling away like before.)

Candle Man: (Like a baby.) Ahhahaha!

Mrs. Candle: Wait, MY BABY! WHERE IS HE GOING?!

Mr. Candle: CATCH HIM!

(They both launch at the floor trying to catch him but he has already toddled too far away. He is heading back inside.)

Candle Man: AHHHAHA! I don’t know what I’m doing but I like it! …Wait, what is that creepy place? (Walks into the Candle Friends’ house, which has been completely trashed. Shaduck, Mystic, and Limefong calm down, Mystic’s mental breakdown managing to fade out.)

Limefong: It’s our house.

Shaduck: You don’t say.

(They all go in.)

Mystic: Wait, what happened to this place?! It’s been completely-

Candle Man: Eggplants!

(Candle Man throws himself into the fridge and eats all the eggplants in it in under 4 seconds.)

Shaduck: You’re going to regret that when you’re older.

Mystic: No wonder he is so obsessed with egg- (Candle Man also eats the remains of the eggplants he didn’t eat.) …plants…

Candle Man: No more eggplants? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! (Slightly sets the fridge on fire.) HOW DID I DO THAT? I NEVER KNEW I HAVE ACTUAL CONTROL OF FIRE! EVERYTHING MOMMY AND DADDY SAID ABOUT THIS IS BEING ABLE TO ACTIVATE IT, BUT IT IS AN EVERYDAY POWER?

Limefong: Jeah, but you shouldn’t…

(Candle Man starts shooting fire from his hands everywhere, out of control.)

Limefong: Play with fire…

Candle Man: Oh yeah, just like what daddy told me after a fire started even though I didn’t do it! Wait, Daddy did that one… Wait, didn’t I? Did Mommy do it? Did Candle Girl do it?

Shaduck: I think you did....

(Candle Man starts to have a tantrum.)

Limefong: Jeah. But by accident…

(Candle Man accidentally creates a fire on the floor and curtains, burning them.)

Candle Man: OW, NO! DID I DO THAT? (Tries to restrain his hand with his other hand to prevent further fire, but he accidentally shoots a fire to the ceiling, turning some of it into dust.)

Candle Man: AHH! (Tears up.) TAKE ME AWAY! I’M NOT SAFE, GET ME TO A PLACE WHERE I DON’T BREAK EVERYTHING! (Breaks down crying.)

(Everyone stares at Candle Man in shock.)

Mrs. Candle: This is getting too dangerous! We need to get him away and calm him down.

Candle Man: I DON'T NEED TO CALM DOWN! (Causes fire around the house.)

Mystic: (Going full demon as her voice is at her highest point.) EVERYONE CALM DOWN NOW!

(Everyone stops and is completely silent… except for Candle Man who is still wailing and is still struggling with his powers.)

Candle Man: AHH! (Accidentally shoots a fire out of the window and at a tree, burning it.)

(Mystic uses her powers and makes Candle Man freeze in place, along with his fire blasting out. She breathes heavily, trying to calm herself down, and her eyes fade to yellow. Candle Man unfreezes and goes back to being unable to control himself.)

Candle Man: AHH! WHY AM I BURNING EVERYTHING!?

Shaduck: Just stop!

Candle Man: I CAN’T!

Mr. Candle: That’s it, everyone, evacuate the house before he completely burns it to dust! We’ll take care of Candle Man!

(The Main 4, excluding Candle Man, run out of the house. Mr. and Mrs. Candle control the fire and remove it.)

Candle Man: Thank you for saving me, mommy and daddy!

Mrs. Candle: It’s alright.

(Scene cuts to Mystic, Shaduck, and Limefong.)

Limefong: Well, it seems like everything is under control now!

Shaduck: But it’s not over yet! He’s still a toddler!

Mystic: How are we going to get him back?

Shaduck: I know… (Rubs his hands together mischievously.)

(The scene cuts to the Spammers’ lair, the three spying on the Spammers.)

Ivanmaste: Darn, his parents have contained all of his destruction!

Whickey: Then we’re going to have to deal with this ourselves!

Shaduck: Nope!

Gyux: Abhufj? (Subtitles: Huh?)

(The three jump out from the corner.)

Whickey: GET THEM!

(Limefong grabs the remains of the baby potion they used on the eggplant and aims it at the Spammers.)

Maps: Wait, no!

Limefong: If you don’t tell us how to turn Candle Man back to normal, then I will throw this!

(The Spammers exchange glances.)

Luis: It’s on the second shelf, it still is too. Boo hoo.

Limefong: Good choice.

(Limefong takes the antidote.)

Ivanmaste: HE DOESN’T HAVE THE BABY POTION! LET’S GET HIM!

(Shaduck grabs the baby potion and throws it at the Spammers. They all turn into babies. They all coo before they start crying.)

Mystic: Let’s get out of here!

(The Spammers pile on top of the three.)

Mystic: Get off!

Limefong: I can’t get up!

(Shaduck teleports out of the pile and starts trying to pull Mystic and Limefong out the baby pile when Candle Man bursts in.)

Candle Man: There you are! (Runs towards the three but slips and drinks the antidote, which turns him back to normal) Woah! I’m back to normal! Yaya!

(Candle Man and Shaduck pull Mystic and Limefong out of the pile and shove them all into cages. Young Ivanmaste throws another one of the eggplants - not an ordinary one, but the de-ager one from earlier.

Candle Man: I’m not gonna fall for this trick a second time! (Dodges the eggplant.)

Limefong: Come on, guys let’s go.

(The Candle Friends run out of the lair.)

Candle Man: Thanks for getting me back to normal guys…though I didn’t have that fire shockwave before. Is this a power-up or something?

Mystic: You might say that. That substance I had gave you that power along with getting you back to normal. It’s rare for someone to possess it, and you now have it.

Candle Man: Oh. Which means… (Candle Man runs at the speed of light to Candle Girl.) SIS! I HAVE SOMETHING YOU DON’T! (Creates a fire shockwave again then runs back to the house.)

Candle Man: This is what it means: I’m a lucky guy! I AM FINALLY SUPERIOR TO CANDLE GIRL! Mommy and daddy always preferred her over me, but don’t ask about it. Anyway, let’s get back to the topic, is this shockwave going to be useful against the Spammers one day?

Limefong: We never know, but maybe it will. Maybe…

(Episode ends.)