14: EPIC SIDE QUEST

**Random side-quest! Words to be incorporated:**

**Hopscotch, Arachnophobia, Magic pistol, Train**

* **Oris and Tarlenheim are resting at 3 roses, sharing an afternoon wine, when a small girl 13 years old runs in with a bloody dress, screaming about a dead pet curly-whurly, and Thomas (a boy armed with a mere handaxe) who ran after a big hairy monster.**
* **Praxis the wood elf, (played by Chris), introduces himself “I have a map tattooed on my body! You may not know where it is!”**
* **Oris presditigitates the girls dress to be clean!**
* **We gather our equipment, and head out. The elf picks up the trail!**
* **We find the clearing with the blood, and Oris and Tarlenheim root around spoiling the evidence, however the elf was still able to find the SPIDER trail!**
* **As we are walking we are blissfully unaware of multiple clues (of course we all failed our perception checks).**
* **We come to a grove/pasture, and can hear livestock, so we know we’re close to the town again. We see a flat stone with a yellow basket on it about 60? feet away. As I get closer, I notice squares with numbers in them. In the basket, there is a half-eaten cake bit, along with sorghum, and a whirlygig of a thing, and another small toy. We search, and find a trail leading away from town, into the woods, and we see the boot prints are a little heavier (maybe thomas’?) And we head off into the woods to follow the trail. We all fail a wisdom check! Some shadows work some weird movements, and we all get a little dizzy. We find the trail again, and boldly continue.**
* **We start to feel spider webs breaking on us, not a crazy amount just yet, and still the webs are of normal size. We notice some hatchet marks, and fail yet more perception checks as we sure-headedly move forward.**
* **We come to a bowl shaped clearing, and the boy’s trail slides down the slope, and then there is a gap of about 5 feet where it looks like Thomas jumped.**
* **Oris pokes the blank ground with zombie stick, and a giant spider immediately grabs oris**
* **The mighty Elf pulls back his bow string, strikes a mighty pose, and critically fails! His arrow flies out aimlessly into the forest.**
* **Andrich Sneak attacks a heavy blow to the spider attacking him, then turns in a mad thwirl and stabs Oris for 7 damage (another critical failure)**
* **Oris lv2 magic missiles the shit out of the spider behind him, and casts spiritual hammer, and a glowing carpenter’s hammer smacks the spider.**
* **The spiders hit all of their attacks, knocking Oris unconscious.**
* **Praxis shoots the spider attacking Tarlenheim, killing it, then runs back to back to back with Tarlenheim.**
* **Tarlenheim Thrusts with his off hand, and stabs Oris yet again! (only 1 pt of damage). Oris makes his saving throw. His second attack finishes the giant spider.**
* **45 spiders of various size swarm Tarlenheim and 27 swarm Praxis, and we both develop maddening arachnophobia.**

* + **Tarlenheim gets the urge to eat something! He starts to bite the spiders back! Several spiders are eaten in this way**
	+ **Praxis loses speech and starts babbling**
	+ **This lasts for 20 turns.**
* **Praxis hits the remaining spider with an arrow. While crazily babbled elvish.**
* **Short rest, makes a fire. Everyone heals while resting.**
* **Searching starts**

* + **There is a lamb and child shaped cocoon above us in the tree.**
	+ **Praxis climbs up the tree, and more spiders start creeping towards him.**
	+ **Oris starts sacred flaming all those tiny little spiders, essentially turning into jubilee making spiders go up in a giant fireworks display.**
	+ **Praxis lowers down the cocoon, and see 3 others that are man sized.**
	+ **We undo the cocoon, and it is thomas! He cries blubbering as he recounts his story. I give the boy some rations,**
* **We take some time and unwind the silk**
* **LOOT**

* + **50 feet spider web rope (3, one for each)**
	+ **Corpse1: wood elf**

* + - **Cloak of elvenkind (1, Praxis)**
		- **Boots of elvenkind (1, Tarlenheim)**
		- **+1 Elven longsword (1, Praxis) [in D&D beyond**
		- **20 Crowns (to Praxis)**
	+ **Corpse 2: Druid**

* + - **Ring of Animal Influence (Oris)**
		- **Bag of Tricks, Rust colored (Oris)**
		- **Druid’s Robe (Tarlenheim)**
	+ **Corpse 3: Time has worn it down to a skeleton. Once a woman**

* + - **Necklace of Adaptation (Tarlenheim)**
		- **Robe of useful items (Oris)**

* + - * **Covered in patches, and you yank them off, toss them, and you get something. It gets all of the normal things.**
			* **A window 2x4, up to 2 feet deep.**
			* **Iron Door 10x10, barred on the side of your choice, it confirms to the open space**
			* **Iron Door #2**
			* **Iron door #3**
			* **10 Gems, worth 100 GP each**
			* **Silver coffer, worth 500 GP**
			* **Silver coffer, worth 500 GP**
			* **Silver coffer, worth 500 GP**
			* **Bag of 100 GP**
			* **Wooden ladder 24’ long**
			* **Wooden ladder #2**
			* **Wooden ladder #3**
		- **Magic pistol!!! Found it in the amongst the bones of the dead (Tarlenheim)**

* + - * **Firedrake +1 Pistol (pathfinder edition) Does 1d6 extra flame damage.**
			* **Martial Ranged Weapon proficiency**

**You must train to use the weapon.**