Jonathan/Synopsis

## Biography

### Background

Not much is known about Jonathan's history, except for the fact he works at a soup kitchen, where he would work so hard that he would vent his frustrations by playing video games.

### Fairy Dance Arc

#### Pre-Episode 13

At some point, Jonathan became one of the roleplayers who flocked to ALfheim Online, a children's edutainment VRMMO set in a land of fairies, where he played as a Salamander named PantySmasher and started roleplaying as a sexually predatory General.

After a while, the players began to wonder what was at the top of the World Tree, a massive tree in the center of the game, as it was heavily guarded. As they speculated what kind of prizes awaited beyond such a quest, a rumor began to spread that whoever got to the top of the tree first would get their wish granted by the Fairy King, Oberon. With this incentive, the players divided themselves into nine factions and began fighting in a "war" to see who could do this first, dubbing this competition the "Race War".

However, at some point, two of the original founders of ALO, Brian and Becky, broke up, and the fallout was so messy that the two of them ended up stealing each other's characters. With Brian now in control of Sakuya, the Queen of the Sylphs, he decided to use the Race War as an excuse to get the players to pick a side in his fight against Becky, which Becky, now in control of the Salamander King, Eugene, perpetuated.

Sometime after this, Jonathan started dating Becky. However, despite the fact that Becky viewed this as a "healthy" relationship compared to her previous one, she would always complain about Brian and do things like decorating Eugene with a stupid looking armor and fidget spinner, claiming it was a medal, and making the Salamander's national anthem Darude Sandstorm, simply because she knew it would annoy Brian, something that upset Jonathan.

Eventually, PantySmasher came into contact with a Sylph named Cazmer, whose real name was Travis. Travis was also tired of Brian and Becky's fighting, and the two teamed up to try and get the two exes to talk. Cazmer then came to the conclusion that the best way to accomplish their goal was to assassinate Leafa, the Princess of the Sylphs, and spark a war between their two races, as that was the only way to get the two leaders in the same room. PantySmasher then sent numerous Salamanders to try and kill Leafa, but she always managed to escape.

#### Episode 13

Eventually, PantySmasher and two of his fellow Salamanders and co-conspirators, DeezGunz and Keith, ambushed Leafa in the Ancient Forest. They eventually cornered her, and PantySmasher commends her for evading them for so long. However, he informs her that they are out of patience and that she's out of options. With nowhere for Leafa to go, DeezGunz asks her to strip for them and Keith starts chucking mayonnaise at her. Leafa then begs the Salamanders not to take her innocence, as she's saving it for Prince Cazmer, and if she loses it, war will rage once more in the Sylph Realm, and begs for their mercy. However, PantySmasher gets confused by the fact that Leafa is crying for help while in a perfect battle stance. Leafa denies this, claiming that she but a humble maiden, taken from the streets and adopted by the kind Queen Sakuya, and has never held a blade in her life. However, she soon runs out of poetic descriptions for how weak she is.

Annoyed, Jonathan calls a character break and starts criticizing Leafa's contradictory character, as she's acting like a helpless damsel while also giving off the aura of a battle-hardened veteran. Leafa apologizes for ruining their fun, claiming that "old habits die hard". Jonathan states that this type of attitude is why he hates the Sylph players, as they don't put in the work and ruin the fantasy for everyone else. He then states that he had a long hard shift at the soup kitchen, and all he wants to do is come home and play as a sexually predatory general named "PantySmasher", asking Leafa to give him that for ten minutes. DeezGunz then interjects and says, back in character, that PantySmasher would only last about two minutes. Amused by this remark, Jonathan uses it as an example of how to roleplay, before asking Leafa what her character wants in this situation. Leafa is confused by such a vaguely general question and says that she doesn't want to get raped, an answer that doesn't satisfy Jonathan.

However, this assassination attempt is halted when a Spriggan comes crashing to the ground in front them. The Spriggan then chastises someone named Yui for making him fly without permission, only to be embarrassed when he realizes he's being watched. He then tries to play cool and asks what's going on, but the Salamanders tell him to leave, as they have "dibs" on Leafa. Though confused by the Salamanders' personas, comparing them to a weird mixture of Deliverance and Peter Pan, the Spriggan asks Leafa if she needs his help. Leafa sees as the perfect opportunity to perfect her persona and accepts the Spriggan's offer, telling him to save her from the "ill-mannered ruffians". Jonathan then voices his pride in Leafa's improvement, telling her that she just needs to ask herself the right questions and her character will write itself. However, everyone is caught off guard when the Spriggan takes to this opportunity to kill Keith. With Jonathan heartbroken by Keith's death and Leafa shocked by how fast the Spriggan is, the Spriggan remarks how it's "good to be home".

#### Episode 14

After the Spriggan kills Keith, DeezGunz voices his disbelief over Keith's demise, and starts monologuing about how it goes against a prophecy. However, the Spriggan catches him off guard and swiftly kills him mid-monologue. Having gotten used to fighting in ALO, the Spriggan challenges PantySmasher to come down and fight. PantySmasher retorts to this by pointing out that the Spriggan has a set of wings and tells him to fly up so they can "settle this like fairies". The Spriggan refuses, however, claiming that flying up to kill the General only to fly back down again to dig his grave would be a wasted effort. This makes PantySmasher realize that the Spriggan can't fly and starts making fun of him for being a part of a garbage race and for being "impotent". This comment causes the Spriggan to throw his sword at PantySmasher, telling him it was a warning shot, before asking where he'd like the Spriggan to aim the next attack.

Irritated, PantySmasher ultimately decides to withdraw from the conflict. He then states that he doesn't know what the Spriggan's relationship with the Sylphs is, but he tells the two players that the Salamanders can't be stopped, and they shall not rest until they have "dat booty". However, Jonathan realizes that his character would never say something like that and blames the Spriggan and Leafa for throwing him off his rhythm. He then tells the two to "enjoy the ground" before departing.

#### Episode 16

The next day, Cazmer tells DeezGunz and Keith that that Sakuya was holding a peace conference in Butterfly Valley with Princess Hime Kuronekodesuchan, the leader of the Cait Sith. Seeing this as a perfect opportunity to mess with Brian, and hunt a few Cait Sith, Eugene gathered his army, PantySmasher included, and flew to Butterfly Valley to attack the peace conference. However, the attack was prevented by the same Spriggan that PantySmasher encountered, who defeated Eugene in a fight.

With the fight over, Sakuya revives Eugene, who remarks how unusually civil this is of her. Sakuya clarifies that she only revived him to prevent the Salamanders from harassing them further, telling Eugene to pay her back for the diamond she used later. Eugene states that it's typical for Sakuya to not "loosen the purse strings a bit" for a revival spell. Sakuya gets offended by Eugene's remark, asking if he thinks her kingdom is cheap. Eugene states that he doesn't need to say that, since Sakuya's outfit is doing all the work for him. Sakuya then points out how ridiculous Eugene's armor looks, particularly with the fidget spinner he's decorated it with. Eugene explains that the fidget spinner is actually a medal, and it's the highest honor the Salamander military can bestow. Just then, a gust of wind causes the "medal" to spin, playing Sandstorm as it does. Eugene then states that the song is the Salamanders' national anthem, which always causes a veteran like him to tear up.

This comment causes Brian to break character and tell Becky that he never said he was a veteran, he just thinks that his job isn't that different from serving in the navy. Becky then snaps back at Brian, reminding him that he's just a lifeguard. The two then proceed to mock each other's former characters and real-life interests. Seeing that his plan to get the two exes to talk things out wasn't turning out like he hoped, Jonathan emerges from the crowd and suggests that they call it a day. Becky assumes this is because Jonathan believes she won't be able to beat Brian due to being a woman, which Jonathan denies, claiming that he thinks they should get going if they want to binge the Crown. This amuses Brian, who remarks that Becky should learn to keep better control of her man. This enrages Becky, who remarks that Brian was always obsessed with control when they were dating. Brian counters that the only time he was being "controlling" was when he apologized on her behalf after she vomited on their neighbor's dog again, even though he was guilty of this himself out of "solidarity".

Becky then reluctantly agrees with Jonathan, stating that fighting everyone at the peace conference isn't worth it. She then tells everyone that they should be lucky that she's in a healthy relationship now, before departing. As she leaves, Hime, whose real name is Denise, breaks character to tell Brian that she can't believe he slept with Becky, only for Brian to remind her that Becky is her cousin. As the Salamanders fly away, Becky slips back into roleplaying mode to ask about the "good news" a Salamander was trying to say earlier, only to let out a mournful scream upon learning that their pet bat Squeaker is dead.

## References

1. ↑ 1.0 1.1 1.2 Episode 13
2. ↑ 2.0 2.1 2.2 2.3 Episode 14
3. ↑ 3.0 3.1 3.2 3.3 3.4 Episode 16
4. ↑ PantySmasher's motivation
5. ↑ Cazmer's motivation