Leni Gets Into a Sticky Situation

This is a parody of the *Winnie-the-Pooh* story "Pooh Goes Visiting and Gets into a Tight Place".

## Lyrics

Leni Loud was walking down the hallway one day, singing to herself. She had made up a song that very morning, as she was doing her morning stretches in front of the vanity: *La la la, la la la* as she stretched up as high as she could go, and then *la la la, la la*-dang it!-*la*! as she fell over while trying to touch her toes. After breakfast, she had said it over and over to herself until she had learnt it off by heart, and now, she was singing it right through, properly. It went like this:

*La la la, la la la*

*La la la, la la la*

*La la diddy-da-dee!*

*Diddy-diddy, diddy-diddy*

*Diddy-diddy, diddy-diddy*

*La-la-la-diddy-dee!*

Well, she was singing this song to herself, and walking along happily, wondering what everybody else was doing, and what it felt like being somebody else, when suddenly she came to the end of the hall, where a doorway was.

"Aha!", said Leni, "*La-la-diddy-da-dee.* If I know anything about anything, that's my and Lori's door," she said, "And if Lori is in, we could have a snack together and I could show her my song. *La-la-la-diddy-dee*!"

So she knocked on the door and said, "Is anybody here?"

There were footsteps from inside the room, and then silence.

"What I said was, 'Is anybody here?'!", called out Leni very loudly.

"No!", said a voice, and then added, "You needn't shout so loud. I heard you quite well the first time."

"Dang it!", said Leni, "Isn't there anybody here at all?"

"Nobody."

Leni Loud turned away from the door and thought for a while, and she thought to herself, "There must be somebody there, because somebody must have said, 'nobody'." So, she turned back to the door and said, "Hello, Lori, isn't that you?"

"No," said Lori, in a different sort of voice this time.

"But isn't that Lori's voice?"

"I don't think so," said Lori, "It isn't meant to be."

"Oh!", said Leni.

She turned away from the door, and had another think, and then she turned back and said, "Well, could you please tell me where Lori is?"

"She has gone to see her sister Leni."

"But this *is* me!", said Leni, very much surprised.

"What sort of 'me'?"

"Leni!"

"Are you sure?", said Lori, feigning surprise.

"Totes sure," said Leni.

"Oh, well then, come in."

Leni walked in.

"You were literally right," said Lori, "It *is* you. Glad to see you."

"Who'd you think it was?"

"Well, I read on the news that there's a burglar who's an uncannily good impressionist, so I wanted to be completely sure it was really you. What about a snack?"

Leni always liked a snack, and she was very glad to see Lori go down to the kitchen to get bowls and mugs, and when Lori said, "Sprinkles or chocolate sauce with your ice cream?", she was so excited that she said, "Both!", and then, so as not to seem greedy, she added, "But don't bother about the ice cream, please."

Lori gave Leni ice cream anyway, and the two girls ate in silence, until at last, singing to herself despite having a brain freeze, she got up, shook Lori lovingly by the hand, and said that she must be going on.

"Must you?", said Lori politely.

"Well," said Leni, "I *could* stay a little longer if it isn't a bother."

"As a matter of fact," said Lori, "I was literally about to go shopping right now."

"Oh well, then, I'll be going on. Goodbye."

"Well, goodbye, if you're sure you won't have any more."

"Is there any more?", asked Leni quickly.

Lori went downstairs and checked the freezer and said, "No, there isn't."

"I thought not," said Leni -- snacks disappeared quickly in the Loud house -- and she nodded to herself. "Well, goodbye. I must be going on."

So, she went out the door, but tripped on one of Lily's rattles, fell backwards, and then ended up stuck to the wall because Lisa had spilt her adhesive there.

"OM-gosh!", said Leni, "I'd better turn around."

"Dang it!", said Leni, "I'll have to go on."

"I can't do either!", said Leni, "OM-gosh *and* dang it!".

Now, Lori exited her and Leni's bedroom and found Leni stuck to the wall. She looked at her.

"Hello, are you stuck?"

"Yes," admitted Leni. "It all comes," she added crossly, "Of having the walls too sticky."

"It all comes," said Lori sternly, "Of experimenting with adhesives! I thought at the time," said Lori, "Only I didn't want to say anything, that *somebody* was experimenting with adhesives, and I knew it wasn't you or me," she said. "Well, well, I'll go and get Lincoln."

Lincoln slept at the other end of the hallway, and when he came back with Lori and saw Leni stuck, he said, "Silly old girl", in such a loving voice that everybody felt quite hopeful again.

"I was just beginning to think," said Leni sniffing slightly, "That I might have to live here. And I'd hate that," she said.

"So would I," said Lori.

"Live there?", said Lincoln, "Of course you won't live there."

"Good," said Leni, "Hey, if we can't pull me off, we might saw around me!".

Lori scratched her chin thoughtfully, and pointed out that, when Leni was sawn around, she'd still have a chunk of wall attached to her back and limbs.

"You mean I'd never get off?", said Leni.

"I mean," said Lori, "That that's not how we'd do it."

Lincoln nodded.

"Then there's only one thing to be done," he said, "We'll have to get Lisa to invent an anti-adhesive."

"How long does making an anti-whatsis take?", asked Leni anxiously.

"About an hour, I should think."

"But I can't stay here for an *hour*!"

"You can *stay* here all right, silly old girl. It's getting you off the wall which is so difficult."

"We'll read to you," said Lori cheerfully, "And I hope you won't need the bathroom," she added. "And, I say, sis, do you mind if I draw you? Because, I mean, there you are -- doing literally nothing -- and it would be a perfect opportunity."

"An hour!", said Leni gloomily, "What about lunch?"

"Lunch will be ready in about an hour's time anyway," said Lincoln, "And we *will* read to you."

Leni sighed, teared up a little, and said, "Then would you read a happy book, such as would help and comfort a stuck girl?"

So, for an hour, Lincoln read that sort of book on the left side of Leni, and Lori drew Leni on the right side, and Lisa worked on her anti-adhesive, and at the end of the hour, Lincoln said, "Now!".

So, Lisa rubbed the anti-adhesive on Leni, and for about thirty seconds, Leni said, "I don't think this wo--" but then all of a sudden, she fell to the floor with a crash.

So, with a nod of thanks to her siblings, she walked off down the hallway, singing proudly to herself, while Lincoln looked after her lovingly and said to himself, "Silly old girl."