The Upside Frown & Killjoy Show

***The Upside Frown & Killjoy Show*** is the seventh episode of *The Alan 10 Skits*.

## Plot

### The Upside Frown & Killjoy Show

*[Several spotlights shined upon closed red curtains, as an disembodied voice enthusiastically narrated over the scene.]*

???: Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, dogs and cats, fire and water alike, we present to you our brand spankin' new broadcast that urges NOT to touch that dial anytime soon!

*[The spotlights eventually centered onto the middle of the scene, as both the curtains finally separated and revealed an enormous logo made from what looked like cardboard reading "THE UPSIDE FROWN & KILLJOY SHOW" in glowing lights, with the heads of the aforementioned transformations crudely drawn on each side, with the former having chalk white skin, exaggerated facial features that almost seemed to levitate off his actual face, including arrow-shaped eyes and a rainbow-colored smile, and a large multicolored mohawk, and the latter having dark gray skin with no facial features whatsoever.]*

???: *THE UPSIDE FROWN & KILLJOY SHOW! STARRING...*

*[Upside Frown kicked straight through the logo, his leg ripping a large hole into it before the rest of his body emerged and tore it apart, before reaching off to the sides and pulling the less-than energetic Killjoy into the view of the camera.]*

Upside Frown: YOUR HOSTS, ME, AND HIM!

Killjoy: I told you we needed that logo for future episodes.

Upside Frown: We can fix that in editing, my monotone friend!

Killjoy: I thought we were going to do this live.

*[Upside Frown briefly paused upon realization and grabbed hold of his camera as the scene instantly cut to the stage behind the curtains, appearing similar to a talk show although with distractingly excessive decorations, including tangled Christmas lights, non-sensical motivational posters, and a giant marble statue of Benedict Cumberbatch dressed like a Spanish conquistador. Upside Frown sat down on one of the two luxurious recliners intended for him and his guest, as mechanisms within the floor automatically whirred as they moved his desk, which was seemingly made entirely out of gouda, in front of him, in the process causing whatever was on the cheese desk to fall off. Killjoy sat partially out of the camera's view on a simple metal folding chair.]*

Upside Frown: Let us not beat around the bush any longer and welcome our first guest to the show! He comes from the planet Khoros, hates the military with a burning passion, and has one too many fingers, yet only ONE head on his shoulders! Please welcome... ***KHAL RAZTACK!***

*[Upside Frown pressed an enormous bright red button on the wall directly behind his head, causing a trapdoor on the ceiling above the unoccupied recliner to open as the aforementioned Tetramand suddenly fell and crashed through, crushing the chair underneath his weight and standing up in a confused panic.]*

Khal Raztack: Wh-Where am I? This isn't the Annihilators' ship?!

Upside Frown: This isn't Kansas either, my four-eyed friend! Have a seat, why don't you?

*[A confused Khal Raztack hesitated at the sight of Upside Frown, before sitting on the remains of the recliner he had accidentally crushed like it was still intact, briefly glancing over at Killjoy upon noticing that he was there, who only responded with a bored wave.]*

Upside Frown: Now, now, now, we've heard around the block some real *SPICY* gossip about your disdain for Mananofy? Care to shine some light upon that?

Khal Raztack: Well, I wouldn't say "disdain," but I will say I've had this reoccurring nightmare about being mugged at gunpoint by anthropomorphic sloth men with handguns made out of waffle irons, and every time I bring it around the other Annihilators, I feel like Mananofy seems like there's something funny about it and-

Upside Frown: Whoa, whoa, whoa, something about waffle irons? *[taking chunk out of corner of desk and eating it, audibly chewing while speaking]* Now let us both think about this, maybe these here sloth people are actually salesmen trying to sell some newfangled inventions? Have you considered that?

Khal Raztack: I mean, of course not! Every time I have that nightmare it ends with me getting shot with bacon bullets, and I wake up feeling like I still smell like pig fat and-

*[A loud buzzer suddenly sounded in the middle of Khal Raztack's sentence, prompting an enormous spring-loaded boxing glove twice his size to come out of nowhere and punch him out of the camera's view, causing him to crash through more of the set in the process. Killjoy nonchalantly stepped off his chair and attempted to take a piece out of the desk to eat himself, only for his hand to be smacked away by Upside Frown.]*

Upside Frown: NUH UH, THAT'S FOR THE GUESTS! *[clearing throat, before talking to the camera again]* Sorry about that, folks! We're totally a tad tight on time at the current moment, so let's go on right ahead and introduce our next guest! Here from the planet of Galvan, please welcome... ***CEREBRONITTION!***

*[Upside Frown pressed the button behind his head again, although the trapdoor in the ceiling only let out a muffled buzz, seemingly jammed from Khal Raztack partially crashing through it due to his much larger size. Upside Frown repeatedly pressed the button over and over in clear frustration, as due to his distraction, Killjoy spitefully torn off an fist-sized chunk out of the cheese desk and pressed it to his face despite his lack of a mouth, as the cheese still vanished bite by bite regardless. The entire stage momentarily malfunctioned, with the desk suddenly shifting back and forth from the sliding mechanisms going haywire, and a couple of the spotlights flickering on and off. The trapdoor finally opened, although a confused Zedipar instead fell out and onto the pile of what was left of the recliner.]*

Upside Frown: NO, THAT'S NOT CEREBRO-! *[hesitating again upon realizing the camera was still recording]* I mean... WOW, EVERYONE! OUR SURPRISE GUEST, ZEDIPAR, FROM THE PLANET OF VELOCURRE AND ANOTHER MEMBER OF THE ANNIHILATORS!

Zedipar: You've got a serious cockroach problem up there, Alan! You told us to come here as quick as possible because Richard was... are you filming something right now?

Upside Frown: Only some good old-fashioned brain fodder for the self-righteous Americans back at home! Take a seat!

Zedipar: Um... I don't think I will. I'll be going now, so thank you for wasting my time.

Upside Frown: Whoa, whoa, whoa, LEAVING the SHOW, before you even have the chance to... ***SPIN! THAT! WHEEL!***

*[An alarm suddenly went off with Upside Frown's announcement as numerous balloons, streamers, and confetti all fell from the ceiling at once, eventually followed by Cerebronittion himself who crashed out of another hole after apparently getting lost up there, although his spontaneous arrival was ignored by everyone else. Killjoy rolled out an enormous prize wheel, with each of its prizes being extremely vague and abstract, along the lines of "Spend fifteen minutes inside the freezer," "Choose between eight dollars and thirteen dollars," and "Spin again but only slowly."]*

Zedipar: ...I'm so confused.

Upside Frown: Go on, and give it a spin, Zedipar!

Cerebronittion: Ow... my aching...

Upside Frown: HEY, YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED HERE RIGHT NOW! SECURITY!

*[The same loud buzzer from before went off again, prompting the boxing glove to emerge again and send Cerebronittion flying out of the camera's view, as an extremely bewildered and almost terrified Zedipar reluctantly spun the prize wheel, although in doing so, spun it so fast that the wheel itself broke off and rolled straight through several rows of camera equipment, knocking most of them over before ricocheting off a wall and backwards towards the stage. Killjoy ducked as the prize wheel smashed into the Cumberbatch statue, taking off its head before the wheel smashed into the metal rods holding up the curtains, knocking down one of the spotlights in the process and causing it to spark once it smashed against the ground, in turn creating an electrical fire.]*

Killjoy: Oh dear.

*[The entire set malfunctioning once more, the same boxing glove from before shot out of wherever it came from towards the electrical fire, seemingly trying to put it out only for the glove itself to burst into flames and retract backwards, setting the rest of the curtains on fire. Upside Frown looked around in a panic, only to see that Zedipar had already left the building, and Killjoy was very much so not helping in the slightest.]*

Upside Frown: *[whispering]* DO SOMETHING! DO SOMETHING!!!

Killjoy: Ehhhhh... I don't really feel like it... it's been a long day doing nothing.

*[Gritting his rainbow-colored teeth in frustration, Upside Frown reverted back to his human form in a bright red flash of light, quickly dialing up the Simplicitrix and trying to select Overflow's hologram, although the sudden combustion of more of the curtains caused him to stagger back and fall against the ground, prematurely transforming into not his Cascan form, but instead TurmOil, who upon accidentally releasing a burst of oil in every direction that the fire immediately clung onto, Alan was too late to realize his mistake before the camera was immediately engulfed in the blinding orange flash of an explosion. Cutting out once more to color bars, the scene eventually returned through one of the few remaining cameras, its lens partially obscured through ash from the burned remains of their filming studio. TurmOil laid within a heap somewhere amongst the rubble, as Cerebronittion slowly emerged from underneath several charred wooden planks and approached the completely unharmed and unbothered Killjoy.]*

Cerebronittion: Hey... so I was promised I could talk about my newest novel? Do we still have time?

#### Transition

*[The scene remained pitch black until a single purple eye suddenly shined through and revealed itself, cuing the slow emergence of Pride atop a lavender background covered in swirling black stripes, as Pride menacingly lurched forward and engulfed the audience in his tentacles.]*

### No Rust For The Wicked

*[Chloe angrily dragged Alan into the kitchen despite his visible protests in doing so, and his confusion on what she was so mad about, only for her to finally point towards the sink, although nothing appeared to be wrong with it on the outside, only for her to turn on the faucet and cause gasoline to spray out instead of water.]*

Chloe: Can you explain why exactly I almost drank a glass of diesel fuel this morning?

Alan: What? I don't know why it does that either, so I'm not sure why you're accusing me of-!

*[Chloe opened the cabinet doors beneath the sink and revealed that the pipes underneath were all a tangled mass of random machinery, including what appeared to be pressure values, lengths of copper wire, and even a miniature hot rod engine, most definitely the source of the gasoline-flavored water. Alan stared down at it, unblinking for several moments, before eventually caving into the pressure.]*

Alan: *[holding head in shame]* HMMMM, FINE! I THOUGHT THE WATER PRESSURE WAS A LITTLE LOW LAST NIGHT, SO I THOUGHT IT WAS A PROBLEM WITH THE PIPES, SO I TURNED INTO DECAGON VREEDLE AND TRIED FIXING IT MYSELF!

Chloe: What the hell would you try to fix a sink using Decagon Vreedle when all he does is make BOMBS?!

Alan: I thought I'd be like fixing a toilet, and he is arguably the best candidate for a transformation that can be a plumber!

Chloe: Can you use someone right now that makes it so the sink doesn't spray out petroleum when you turn it on?

Alan: Well... that's not even supposed to do that regardless. Let me look at it.

*[Alan laid on his back and examined his Vreedle transformation's handiwork, where he was nearly blinded when a value shot out a burst of steam at him, although clenching his right hand shut and sprouting Vertebrain's spiked extremities, accessing his immense levels of dexterity in order to carefully analyze what could be the cause of their problem. Chloe crossed her arms in annoyance as Alan pulled off whatever useless additions Decagon Vreedle had slapped on through using Lodestar's magnetism, delving deeper into the mess of pipes, before finally discovering signs of corrosion through what was most definitely just weathered pipes having used on it due to Decagon Vreedle's stupidity not being able to realize that was a bad idea. Alan scratched his head, unsure what to do about it, only to snap his fingers in realization and activate the Simplicitrix, transforming himself into Rustic.]*

Rustic: Now, Rustic here can not only just make things rust, but he can take off rust too... so I'll just go in here and take a littttttle bit off the top and...

*[Rustic pressed his finger against the visible rust, reverting the metal back to a purified form, before eventually standing up to his feet with a triumphant look.]*

Rustic: There we go, that's much better!

Chloe: How does getting rid of the rust fix the fact that you shoved a car engine under-?!

*[Rustic turned on the faucet again, which miraculously caused crystal-clear water to spray out instead of gasoline before. A confused Chloe stared at it in disbelief, although before she can admit that she was wrong, a layer of rust immediately formed over the part of the faucet that Rustic made contact with to turn the sink on, before slowly creeping up the rest of the faucet. With the loud creak of straining pipes, the entire sink itself was engulfed within rust before caving inwards into the interior of the cabinets below, unleashing a wave of water that immediately soaked the kitchen floor. An exasperated Rustic reverted back to his human form, and staring at Chloe's scowling expression, loudly sighed and reached into his pocket to pull out his phone.]*

Alan: Yeah, yeah, I'm calling our plumber.

#### Transition

*[The scene turned into a golden metallic background as Gyrobot waddled in, soon letting out a motorized whirring as his torso and arms began rapidly spinning around in place, transforming himself into a propeller that pushed himself off the ground after a few moments, before suddenly diving towards the audience and slicing the camera apart into pieces.]*

### Season's Sneezings

*[An explosion occured from within a local pet shop, as emerging through the smoke with bags of stolen bird seed housed within his beak, Jail-Berd attempted taking off into the skies with his pillaged goods, only to be knocked back into the ground by a strong gravitational pull, the source of which upon his recovery, revealed himself to be Alan coming to stop his antics once more.]*

Jail-Berd: Ugh, you again? I can't indulge in simple-minded crimes if it's canonical or not!

Alan: Stick a sock in that beak of yours, Jail-Berd, because I'm sending you to half your namesake! Hah!

Jail-Berd: You've said that pun the last four times we've met like this! Would it kill you to come up with new material?!

*[Alan frowned and transformed himself in response, and separating apart into the four members of Season's Greetings. A terrified Jail-Berd went wide-eyed and dropped the bags of bird seed from his beak upon hearing the sounds of thunder cracking from the skies above, as a storm cloud began forming around him.]*

Season's Greetings *(Fons)*: SPRING!

Season's Greetings *(Aestas)*: SUMMER!

Season's Greetings *(Cadere)*: AUTUMN!

Season's Greetings *(Heims)*: WIN... WIN... ***ACHOO!!***

*[Sniffling loudly after accidentally interrupting their attack preparation, the three other members of Season's Greetings looked towards Heims in confusion, seeing that her face was prominently red and inflamed, clearly showing the most recognizable symptoms of allergies, as she rubbed and wiped her nose, or at least where one would normally be, with the end of her scarf.]*

Season's Greetings *(Cadere)*: Heims... are you alright there?

Season's Greetings *(Heims)*: *[audibly congested]* Yeah... yeah... a little allergic to the sun... I'm fine... let's just... let's... ***ACHOO!!***

*[Heims' sneeze released a massive cold front that immediately flash-froze several cars within the parking lot of the pet shop, startling Jail-Berd and causing him to leap to the side. Although trying to wipe her face again, Heims repeatedly sneezed several times, accidentally freezing many objects around her, including Aestas from the neck down.]*

Season's Greetings *(Heims)*: ...Whoops.

Season's Greetings *(Aestas)*: Cover your mouth with your elbow!

Season's Greetings *(Heims)*: Sorry, I always tend to forget at the... ***ACHOO!!!***

Season's Greetings *(Fons)*: Um, perhaps we should do this another time? Hey, Jail-Berd, is that alright with you?

*[Fons turned around towards Jail-Berd to get his response on the situation, only to see him having dropped the bags of bird seed and making a run for it, before immediately taking flight to get as far away from them as possible. Another sneeze startled Fons, discovering that Cadere had accidentally caught her sickness and was now red in the face too. Attempting to shield his face, Cadere still sneezed through the gaps of his fingers, sneezing out a massive gust of wind that blew Heims backwards, knocked over several unfrozen cars, and exploded the bags of bird seed Jail-Berd had left behind in his hasty escape, releasing their contents everywhere and causing every single bird within a mile radius to come towards them, with one even landing on the half-frozen Aestas' head.]*

Season's Greetings *(Fons)*: Aestas, if you melt through that ice anytime soon, do you remember how much cold medicine is at the pharmacy down the street?

*[Heims accidentally released another massive sneeze in the others' direction, partially freezing Fons from underneath a layer of ice like him too.]*

Season's Greetings *(Fons)*: ...I change my mind. Please hurry up.

#### Transition

*[The scene turned into a multicolored rainbow background as Entropic Punch paced around, confusedly reading a book labeled "Thermodynamics For Dummies," before eventually noticing the audience and only shrugging his shoulders in response, before resuming reading and waltzing out of view, causing the background to dissipate alongside him.]*

### Gnome Sweet Gnome

*[Slowly trailing the sounds of mischievous laughter, interrupted by electrical sparking, carbonated bubbling, and metallic vibrating, a confused Alexis eventually pinpointed their origin inside of the wooden shed from within the house backyard. Knocking lightly on the exterior of the shed door, Alexis glanced behind her at the overgrown lawn that hadn't been moved yet after hearing a frightened gasp interrupting the crazed fits of laughter inside, followed by quiet footsteps moving towards the door, then the unlatching of several locks, then the creaking of wood as the door opened ever so slightly, allowing Guarden to poke his head out and peer up at Alexis.]*

Guarden: ...Yes, Alexis?

Alexis: You know, when you volunteered to mow the lawn, I should have known there was a catch. I swear that I've been hearing you pretending that you're a little mad doctor from the inside of the house, are you going to mow the lawn or no?

Guarden: *[grumbling]* You know I don't trust that old lawnmower, especially since I had a much better idea that will take only a portion of the time needed to do so!

Alexis: ...Would that reason happen to involve why I haven't seen Devin in the past few hours? Is he in there fooling around with you?

Guarden: Ummm... of course not! Now, if you excuse me, my current contraption is nearly complete, so if you may-!

*[An annoyed Alexis pried her fingers into the gap between the door and forced it open to see what exactly he was up to, simultaneously discovering what Guarden had been up to along with where Devin had been, now seeing the grotesque monster that the latter had now became from Alan's experimentations on him in order to transform him into the perfect organism capable of the most optimal forms of trimming and suppressing the growth of plant-life into a smaller state that can be suppressed into different shortened lengths however mankind pleases... which in other words, Devin was sitting down with weedwhackers duct-taped onto the ends of his tentacles.]*

Guarden: Well, since you are the most impatient and the most rude, behold, THE PINNACLE OF MY EXPERTISE, THE LAWNBREAKER 3000!

Alexis: Devin, please tell me you haven't been entertaining him for the past few hours.

Devin: Listen, I don't know about you, but I genuinely want to see how this plays out in the end.

Alexis: Okay, when something important gets cut off, do you want me to call an ambulance myself or will you have that covered yourself?

Guarden: RISE, MY CREATION, AND SUBDUE THIS OVERGROWN VEGETATION! MAKE EVERY BLADE OF GRASS KNEEL BEFORE YOU!

*[Devin levitated upwards into the air and out of the shed, channeling electricity into his tentacles and causing the attached weedwhackers to each activate, as Devin brought them downwards and surprisingly put them to good use despite the struggle he had in keeping them steady. Guarden laughed maniacally at the sight of the "Lawnbreaker 3000" laying waste to the overgrown grass, while an annoyed Alexis slowly stepped back into the shed. Devin began struggling as one of the weedwhackers began shaking uncontrollably from accidentally being overloaded with electricity, moving faster and faster until the end suddenly broke off and fell through the air, which Guarden miraculously avoided through tunneling downwards underground with his earth magic, although not fast enough for it to not take off the lower half of his beard.]*

Devin: Sorry, that was too much power!

Guarden: A SUCCESS REGARDLESS!

*[Alexis emerged from the shed, pulling the cord of a leaf blower and pointing it towards a startled Guarden that immediately began running away in fright.]*

Guarden: GAH, NOT THE LEAF BLOWER! I AM A GENIUS! STAY AWAY!

Alexis: STOP DUCT-TAPING GARDENING EQUIPMENT ONTO YOUR FRIENDS, ALAN!

## Characters

* Alan Nomaly
* Alexis Dwyer
* Chloe Nietzsche
* Devin Lorenzo
* Pride *(transition)*
* Khal Raztack
* Zedipar

### Villains

* Cerebronittion
* Jail-Berd

## Aliens Used

### Alan Nomaly

#### Actually Used

* Upside Frown *(debut)*
* Killjoy *(debut)*
* TurmOil *(selected alien was Overflow)*
* Rustic
* Gyrobot *(transition)*
* Season's Greetings
* Entropic Punch *(transition)*
* Guarden *(debut)*

#### Powers Only

* Vertebrain
* Lodestar
* Gravattack

## Allusions

* Upside Frown references *The Wizard of Oz* when telling Khal Raztack that neither of them are in Kansas nor the Annihilators' ship.
* Entropic Punch's transition shows him reading a book on the mechanics behind his entropy-based abilities, with "Thermodynamics For Dummies" being an actual real book written by Mike Pauken.

## Trivia

* *The Upside Frown & Killjoy Show* was originally a prank show skit, with Alan tormenting his friends with wild and random pranks, before accidentally blowing up part of the house after the old water bucket over the door trick on Devin, only to reveal the twist that the water was instead napalm jelly which accidentally ignites when the spotlight falls and starts a fire, and causing the explosion when Killjoy accidentally becomes TurmOil instead of Overflow while trying to extinguish him due to his boredom not causing him to pay attention to the Simplicitrix holograms.