2029 Taco Bell Attack

Shots taken of the taco bell just 5 minutes before the attack.

The 2029 Taco Bell Attack was a laxative attack and bombing done on March 5th, 2029 at the largest Taco Bell in the world, located in Detroit. It killed 70 people and injured 59, most of them having suffered massive bowel movements. The only known perpetrator was Fanter Fanterson the IV, a Gloopistani song writer. It is the largest terrorist attack to-date. The attack involved various bluetooth speakers playing "Music that makes you poop" as well as various home-made bombs that had piss as the main ingredient and laxatives that were snuck into the burritos. The crime has inspired several copycats. Many makeshift memorials were created after the attacks.

## The Massacre

### 11:19 am: Strange Floppas enter the area

Survivors of the event recall 2 strange floppas begin to plant odd-looking devices around the building. These were later found to be piss bombs.

The floppas were also found to have been purchasing bluetooth speakers at the nearest Walmart.

### 11:25 am: Laxatives were snuck into the burritos

One by one, another survivor spotted them putting some odd liquid into the burritos, then putting them back into the kitchen. The employees, however, failed to notice the strange floppas putting the burritos back into the kitchen..

### 11:35 am: Massacre begins

A floppa who wished to stay inside of the car pulled out his phone and began to play this music, causing most floppas in a 50 mile radius begin to have severe bowel movements. Survivors then describe various floppas hitting people with a bus stop sign, knocking most of them out. Some floppas look to see what was going on, before being hit by the same bus stop sign.

### 11:46 am: Police response

Police were immediately called to the scene and began to swarm the building, not letting the floppas escape. This was the exact moment the piss bombs were launched, blinding a few police officers. One of the perpetrators looked down at a cold scared floppa, before shooting the floppa with the Airpod Shotty accessory. Though gravely injured, that floppa would survive. The same perpetrator would grab the airpods and use it to shoot a police officer the opposite direction of him. This perp would then jump out of the window and let the other mysterious floppas do their work.

### 12:01 am: Bathroom Killings

2 of the 4 known perps still at the crime scene began to enter the bathroom and investigate their surroundings. They noticed 2 floppas in the 2nd stall, hiding from the killers. They entered the stall and shot both floppas 5 times each, killing one and injuring another. They then climbed above the stall and shot a floppa from above, shooting him directly in the brain and killing him. An attacker then decided the bus sign from earlier wasn't needed, and threw it at another floppa still in the bathroom before leaving. This floppa would survive and only need a few stitches.

### 12:20 am: Perps escape

A perp began to exchange gunfire with police to stall the police from noticing the attackers setting up their escape. Once they finished discussing how to escape, the same perp detonated a piss bomb before they escaped through the window and escaped through an unoccupied police car and began travelling down the highway.

## Immediate Aftermath

Bomb squads disarmed all the piss bombs while the bodies were gradually removed from the Taco Bell and moved to a Coroner's Office, so they could be properly autopsied and identified. After a few hours later, the building was considered safe to enter by the bomb squad. PS1 Floppa, president of Gloopistan, rushed to make an immediate statement about the attacks. A few weeks after the attacks, The Gloopistan Taco Bell memorial was created.

## **Sus**pects

### Bling Bling Floppa

Bling Bling Floppa is said to have been involved in the attacks, since his song "Floppa-Pop", released one day before the attack, included a summary of the events that occured. The song also details a possible motive for the attacks, stating because they "didn't have that sauce." However, since Bling Bling Floppa died, no-more info can be gained from him.

### PS1 Floppa

Since PS1 Floppa was a pro bingus supporter, and the Taco Bell was a popular hangout spot for floppas, PS1 Floppa could've hired assassins to shoot up the Taco Bell or he could've done it himself. A few shooters were reported saying various pro-bingus propaganda, and also saying that "floppa had it coming." At one point, a shooter said "ALL HAIL PS-" before tripping and falling in the Taco Bell bathroom.

### Fanter Fanteriounson the IV

Fanter Fanteriounson the IV was speculated to have been part of the attacks. This claim was proved false until Fanter confirmed it himself. However, he wasn't the main perp and had little to no other involvement in the attacks aside from providing piss samples and bluetooth speakers and laxatives.

### Greybus

Since Greybus is responsible for one of the most deadliest terrorist attacks in history, it has been speculated that he is responsible for the attacks. He couldn't have done it himself, since he was in the UFA at the time, but maybe he could've hired hitmen.