336: Brackishly Clear

## Summary

En route to *Millings Goods & Sundry*, Rosco explains to Sheemie that he has a set of alternative memories, one of which is his sexual encounter with a fairy queen, leading him to believe that he may originally be from the fey realm. But what was he running from when he appeared in this plane? Meanwhile at the river, the funeral procession led by Captain Paisley is approaching, but there's just time before they board the ferry for Raphina to gift Gary her well-thumbed and ripe-smelling guide to ferrying.

## Synopsis

Sheemie is driving the cart as he and Rosco head off to find *Millings Goods & Sundry*. Sheemie invites Rosco up next to him as he's very keen to try and solve the puzzle that is the "cloudy" nature of events in Rosco's past. Rosco explains that he has what feels like two sets of memories: a lucid timeline that connects the present with his earliest memory, that of accidentally killing a man by pushing him off a ledge when he was a boy, and another set of memories that seem to coexist in parallel, almost as if they're in some other dimension or reality. He has moments when he feels like he belongs to the alternative set, but they're fleeting. Rosco's sense of confusion stems from this feeling that he's not even sure what's real. Sheemie can relate to this, in the sense that he too has a split memory, from before and after the party went under the lake.

Rosco thinks this alternative version of himself is something to do with his intimate relations with a Fairy Queen.. Sheemie knows about this and isn't embarrassed to talk about the birds and the bees. Sheemie's use of this phrase reminds Rosco of the memory that re-surfaced while they boated down the river, in which he was surrounded by flowers while making love to the aforementioned Fairy Queen. Suddenly Rosco recalls something else about his earliest memory. When he ran into the man by the ledge, Rosco was running away from something, terrified, having emerged from somewhere, he thinks, the alternate plane of existence that his other memories belong to. This set him on his current timeline. It all reminds him of the time he accidentally cast *Misty Step* and experienced some unsettling orbs.

Rosco recalls how Aeon the Anglerfish told him he had some fey magic in him, and begins to piece these things together. *"I'm from somewhere... Maybe, yeah! I'm from somewhere where there was a fairy queen! Do you think I might be, like, a fairy king?"* he says as the pair ponder this latest theory that Rosco may actually be from the fey realm. Sheemie's confused about the timeline though, as it seems that Rosco's experiences with the Fairy Queen in the fey realm must have preceded his earliest memory as a young boy in this realm. Rosco is considering this when his eyes go wide, he starts to make choking sounds, and then a small far-away voice from inside him says, *"Ew."* Unfortunately, this latest odd turn of events cannot be discussed further because they realise they've actually arrived at the *Millings Goods & Sundry* store.

Meanwhile, the procession is approaching the river, so Gary sends Gloria and his family to go and find the place he's arranged for them all to stay. There's just enough time for Raphina to hurriedly hand Gary her foul-smelling copy of the *Ferry Person's Fantastic Fanuel*, a guide book to ferrying. It's a pretty tiny book, which she's been keeping in her sock, hence the smell, that is cleverly able to tailor it's writings to the reader's level of understanding. She recommends getting started on it immediately, but promises to stick around and help him with his important passengers. Gary accepts this gift reverently and begins frantically reading.

Raphina lets down the ferry's ramp and the beefy man leading the procession says formally, *"Captain Malvolio Paisley requesting permission to board."* Raphina again demonstrates her advanced knowledge of nautical terms by correctly responding, *"Granted, mucilage number one. Please proceed."* Gary is trying to explain to the Captain that Raphina is also a ferrier when she interrupts and introduces herself, saying *"I'm very excited to be able to help this young protégé in my field."* She politely rejects the suggestion that she might be hired to run the ferry, so the Captain solemnly requests that they get the first group aboard the ferry so that he can begin drawing the procession to a close. Everyone files onto the ferry, and Gary seems to have already picked up something from Raphina's guidebook, because before she can do anything, he swiftly darts over and lifts the ramp, locking it into position.

The Captain watches closely as Raphina and Gary competently and solemnly set the ferry on its way.

## Quotes

* Abby: *"There's definitely an air of competence. There's competence, and yet, a certain ease. And occasionally there's a tiny, very subtle oar that goes in the air and does a little twirl, but nobody who's upset sees it."* Eric: *"Only the people there who don't give a shit, they see it."*

## Trivia

* The episode title quotes something Eric/Sheemie said. Rosco and Sheemie and riding along together discussing Rosco's past, which is something of a mystery. Sheemie: *"We've got your present, which to you is crystal clear."* Rosco: *"Crystal clear to the extent that things can be crystal clear to a crazy old coot."* Sheemie: *"Right, brackishly clear."*
* This episode (featuring Abby's rendition of Let's Dance) was released on David Bowie's birthday, January 8th!
* Eric's link to Adam's social worker sketch was posted by on the PFD Discord here!
* Tardigrades are known colloquially as water bears or moss piglets! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tardigrade

## Recap Song

*Main article: The Music of Pork Fried Dice*
This episode featured Abby doing a recap to the tune of *Let's Dance* by David Bowie:

*[Verse 1]*

(Let's raft!) Ferryman Gary's unqualified

(Let's raft!) So Raphina lends him all her expertise

(Let's sail!) While she rights the course

(Let's sail!) Gary tells us almost nothing useful

*[Chorus]*

Since we need sleep, we nap a bit

Gary and ferry rhyme

The public library is named for Captain Paisley

Malvolio is his first name, at the corner of Marble and Squalid

*[Verse 2]*

(It's Will!) For fear of Trofast near

(It's Will!) For fear Zantras is here

(Name change!) Valencio Beigeman

(Trust Will!) Don't panic, Batthwack, the serious Batthwack

*[Chorus]*

And if I say mouse, you'll be a mouse

Ride in my pocket too

But please don't poop in there and maybe you should comb your hair

Those tufty locks, a small mohawk, that somehow looks very turtley

(Round room!) Will casts *Unseen Servant*, it smells like clay

(Ladders!) The serious Batthwack, the serious Batthwack

(Trofast!)

(A coup!)

(Mousethwack!)

(Mousethwack!)

(Mousethwack!)

(Mousethwack!)

## Gallery

*Main article: The Art of Pork Fried Dice*

## References

1. ↑ See episode 310: What Kind of God Needs a Carnival?
2. ↑ See episode 302: So Profound, and Yet So Unhelpful
3. ↑ See episode 298: AS YOU FIIIIISH
4. ↑ See episode 308: My Pinky Finger Is Very Precise!
5. ↑ See episode 326: That's My Domain, Don't Wear it Out