recursal/Fanatic-Fandom huggingface dataset:
Learning A Christmas Lesson Via Alternate Timeline

Mrs. Claus (mentioned)

*"How could she* forget *me? It's Christmas!"*
—Elkay(**src**)
Learning A Christmas Lesson Via Alternate Timeline was a holiday special episode.

## Plot

The story starts by explaining that Claire has died just over a year ago, with the opening dialogue being a combination of references to *A Christmas Carol* and the narrator's rambling. Elkay awaits Claire's arrival, expecting her to come as a Christmas miracle and reveal herself to be the narrator. However, she is startled by the arrival of Penumbra instead. Elkay had been waiting since Christmas Eve night for Claire to show, but it is now nearing midnight on Christmas Day. Penumbra invites Elkay to come be with the others, reasoning that Claire will probably be unable to come because she is dead. Elkay insists that she couldn't participate in festivities without Claire, having already missed the Christmas party but anticipating performing a reenactment of a Christmas movie with Claire. They had done Die Hard the previous Christmas, and she hopes to do The Polar Express next. Penumbra expresses doubt that Claire will come, but agrees to sit with Elkay anyway.

After waiting another half-hour, Elkay begins to realize that Claire is not coming and starts crying. Penumbra tries to cheer Elkay up, eventually dressing up as the Ghost of Christmas Past and Santa Claus, but neither helps Elkay. After Penumbra leaves in her second costume, a black-robed and hooded figure appears. Elkay assumes it's Penumbra, but then Penumbra appears attempting to put on a third costume. Elkay flees from the robed figure, which follows her. Eventually it catches up, revealing itself to be Claire. She explains that she was busy due to the holidays but will spend the next three days with Elkay to make up for it. They still have fifteen minutes of Christmas Day left, and Claire has brought a toilet brush, so they have enough time for a short story to reenact. Penumbra watches Elkay and Claire leave, thankful that Claire was able to come after all.

## Trivia

* The story takes place on th second Christmas after Claire's death. This, compared with the timeline of The Silliest Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom FanFiction Ever Written, suggests that Claire's delayed arrival was due to her encounter with the other Claire.
Johnson

Johnson was an employee at Jurassic Park. He was partly responsible for Charlie's capture.

## Biography

In 1995, Johnson was part of a team on Isla Nublar that captured Charlie the *Velociraptor*. He found a rope to hold Charlie down with. When the RV crashed and they were forced to flee from the raptor pack, Johnson took Charlie with them despite his superior's instructions to leave Charlie behind.
Magnesium

## Magnesium

### Uses

Die-castingSulfur removal

Titanium production

Aerospace construction

Solvent purification

Used to make electronic components

Used in pyrotechnics and flash photography

Good starter for emergency fire or flares

Can be used in batteries

### Source

Mined

Magnesium was the 12th element on the periodic table. It burned white.
Mount Sibo

Mount Sibo was a volcano on Isla Nublar. It was filled with diamonds.

## Structure

Mount Sibo was originally triangular in shape, resembling the conical houses of sacred Bribri tradition. Inside of it were magma caverns where diamonds formed.

## Appearances

Mount Sibo is introduced in The Silliest Jurassic Park FanFiction Ever Written. A mysterious storm forms above it, frightening the native creatures into silence.

## Trivia

* Power to the island was derived from geothermal energy in the volcano.
* This mountain was sacred to the Tun-Si tribe who originally lived on Isla Nublar.
* Maps of Jurassic World show Mount Sibo with a crater, unlike in Jurassic Park where it is a conical mountain, meaning that in the Jurassic World timeline it may have erupted.
* Sibù is the Bribri creator deity.
* Mount Sibo is a cinder-cone volcano. These are unusual in the area where Isla Nublar is located.
Monsanto

Monsanto was a soldier during the Great Separation. After killing Penumbra's mother, he vowed to free the Stegoceratops. He succeeded in his goal, but was unable to satisfy his need to redeem himself. He wandered the Earth as a ghost, then voluntarily chose to be sent to the Beneath. He was rescued by Penumbra. She married him and had twins.
Gobi Desert

The Gobi Desert was a desert in Asia. It was the original habitat of *Velociraptor*.

## In TSJPFEW

While flying to Isla Nublar, Dr. Henry Wu admits that the *Velociraptors* cloned by InGen were from the Gobi Desert, implying that their large size and different appearance is due to genetic modification and not because they are actually the North American *Deinonychus*.
Monarch Butterfly

Adult female monarch butterfly

### Common Name

Monarch butterfly, milkweed butterfly, white monarch (for the white Pacific morph), common tiger butterfly, wanderer butterfly, black-veined brown butterfly

## Biology

### Diet

Milkweed as a caterpillar, nectar as an adult

## Habitat

### Universe of Origin

Overworld

Monarch Butterflies were a type of butterfly.

## Trivia

* The monarch butterfly is the one of the farthest-migrating insects, traveling from as far north as southern Canada to parts of northern South America. Only the common North American subspecies migrates.
* Monarch butterflies know the way to migrate even when they have never migrated before.
* There are six subspecies of monarch butterfly, as well as two color morphs of the common subspecies; there is a white morph found in Australia and the Pacific and a North American morph with fewer vein markings.
* Males are slightly larger with darker colors and black spots on the hindwings, and thinner vein marks.
* Even though it has six legs, it only uses four of them.
* Caterpillars of the monarch butterfly only eat milkweed, which is poisonous to other animals. The adults remain poisonous because of their diet.
Lilylotusdrop

The Lilylotusdrop was a flower that grew on Tall Mountain. It was a hybrid of three flowers: the lily for beauty, the lotus for serenity, and the snowdrop for its healing power. It was called Moly by the gods, and was ground up to create powder similar to cocaine. When swallowed, its power could be summoned by speaking a variation on the word "flower". They grew whenever a person pure of heart passed away with unfinished business involving a loved one.
Lowery Cruthers

Lowery Cruthers was an employee at Jurassic World. He went on an adventure with Squadron X and changed into an Ankylodocus, only to change back. He later acquired the ability to go back and forth as an engagement gift. He married Karen and had a daughter by her, making up for the previously miscarried baby.
Mosquito

Mosquitoes were blood-sucking insects. Because they would drink blood, these were some of the creatures that were used by InGen to get ancient animal blood.

## In TSJPFEW

Ellie has a nightmare about the *Tyrannosaurus rex* attack on the Ford Explorers, and her Spirit *Pteranodon* briefly appears before turning into a cloud of mosquitoes that surround her.

## Trivia

* Only female mosquitoes drink blood, and they need it to lay eggs, not as food. InGen probably got a lot of its ancient plant DNA from mosquitoes as well, because they normally feed on plant juices.
North Dock

The North Dock was a dock on Isla Nublar.

## Functions

The North Dock was where supply ships and cruise liners would dock. It had tourist facilities for when people would arrive to Jurassic Park, and also had a container yard where cargo containers and animal cages were stored for later use.

## In TSJPFEW

Robin Smith planned to hotwire a boat at the North Dock to help Alan Grant, Ellie Sattler, and Ian Malcolm escape from Isla Nublar in 1995. However, they did not reach their destination. All the same, Henry Wu and Jay Smith were contacted by their underlings to rendezvous at the North Dock, so the group (minus Robin, who sacrificed herself to allow the others to survive) ended up traveling in that direction anyway.
Nautolan

Jedi Master Kit Fisto, a Nautolan

Nautolan was a species from Star Wars.

## Trivia

* Nautolans had fourteen sensory tentacles on their heads which were used to communicate.
* The Nautolan language included many nonverbal components and could only be understood underwater.
* Nautolans hatched as tadpoles and didn't grow their limbs or tentacles until they were two years old.
* A Nautolan could be expected to live for seventy standard Galactic years.
Krayt Dragon

A greater krayt dragon.

Krayt Dragons were a species from Star Wars.

## In TSJWFEW

A krayt dragon briefly appears in Leia Delivers A Dewback. On Tatooine, Leia releases her newborn dewback into its natural habitat, where it is immediately decapitated by a krayt dragon which ambushes it from under the sand.

## Trivia

* There are two types of krayt; the common or canyon krayt dragon, which is a brown-colored quadruped reaching lengths of 148 feet native to canyons and caves, and the greater krayt dragon, which has ten legs, is gray, and burrows in sand. The greater krayt dragon can reach 328 feet long.
* It is unusual for canyon krayt dragons to burrow, as they are cave-dwelling animals, so the krayt which appears in Leia Delivers A Dewback is more likely a young greater krayt.
* Like dinosaurs, the krayt would ingest stones to aid with its digestion. Used gizzard stones were called dragon pearls or krayt pearls and were highly valued by jewelers.
Dearing, The Pink-Horned Hybrid

Dearing, The Pink-Horned Hybrid was a short story based loosely on Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. It was written mostly in rhyme.

## Plot

Claire Dearing is once again in a state of depression after being permanently stuck as a Stegoceratops. When she goes downstairs for a midnight snack, she hears a disturbance on the rooftop. Black Santa has crashed, as one of his reindeer slipped on black ice and injured himself. He offers Claire a wish in exchange for her assistance in pulling his sleigh, and she accepts. When they make a round of the remaining houses, Claire returns to her ranch and commands Black Santa to make her human. He asks if she wants this for her own benefit or for Owen's, and she realizes that it's not what Owen really wants. Instead, she gives her husband a chance to meet Santa, as he did not have a happy childhood. The next day, Claire opens her gift from Owen (a microscope), and realizes that she will be loved in her current state (though she had already learned this lesson several times prior).
Moku-Pa

Moku-Pa was an Asterparan toucan who served as Elkay's stooge. He led Morton, Penelope, and Nick Van Owen on a frienship journey and attempted to solve the mystery of Henry 2's fall from grace. He gave Ellie advice in the form of a bird call when she was being overprotective of Charlie.

## Trivia

* Specifically, Moku-Pa is a collared aracari.
* Mokú-Pá means "owl parrot" in Bribri.
Liam Sattler

Liam was Ellie's second biological child. She conceived him with Alan as a raptor, and as a result, Liam was more saurian than other members of his species, being much smaller than his peers. He saved Lily from Elkay posing as a snake during an event at preschool. In later years, he ran away from home and met up with Lily, and they decided to start dating after their eventful reunion.
Midi-chloreans

## Midi-chlorean

A midi-chlorean.

Midi-chlorians were possibly the stupidest thing ever. They were microorganisms that channeled the Force, making it usable.

## Trivia

* Midi-chloreans were sapient, somehow.
* George Lucas actually had the idea for midi-chloreans as far back as 1977, but didn't get about to mentioning them in the movies until the prequel trilogy. Because of this, fans hated it.
* The uncharted planet where midi-chloreans originated is called the Wellspring of Life. It was discovered by Yoda.
* Anakin Skywalker set the Galactic record for most midi-chloreans at over 20,000. With over 37 trillion cells in the human body, this means that midi-chloreans would have an extremely low concentration in even the most powerful of Force users. Unless that's meant to be the number of midi-chloreans per cell? They never really specify. If George Lucas is reading this, could you explain?
Lily Dearing

Lily was the daughter of Claire Dearing and Owen Grady. She was known for being stubborn. She dated Liam, who had previously attended her preschool. Lily was talented in dance. She later became a princess when she received her wings. She was appointed as the soul carrier of Elliesium. Her final departure from the world of the living was not caused by death, but rather, her choice to join her parents.

## Trivia

* Lily despised carrots as a child.
* Lily had an irrational fear of noisy appliances.
* Lily's middle name came from Owen's mother.
* Lily was born from an egg with an umbilical cord, and therefore possessed a belly-button.

* In an original draft, Lily was planned to have headaches caused by her hybrid biology. At one point, she would show minor symptoms of FAS, caused by Claire falling into Owen's beer while spying on him and Tammy-Lynn.
Leon

Leon was a Jurassic World employee.

## Biography

### Employment at InGen

Leon learned that Project IBRIS at Jurassic World was looking for a new raptor handler. He applied for the job and was accepted. He learned the position's security protocols and began working.

Early into his employment, he was working at the raptor research arena when a pig that was being used in training was accidentally released into the arena. He attempted to capture it so that it would not be eaten, but Echo got to it before he could pull it out. She pulled Leon into the arena unintentionally, and he was injured in the fall. Owen Grady entered the arena to rescue him, as Blue, Delta, and Charlie were going to eat him.

The following night, Leon was put in charge of releasing the raptors into the wild of Isla Nublar for the first time, as they were needed to track down Indominus.

### After the Incident

Leon eventually married Mariana Stashing, and still was at Jurassic World at that time.

## Trivia

* According to the Masrani Global Corporation website, Colby Boothman-Shepard (the actor who played the part of Leon in the film) is a paddock supervisor in Jurassic World. Whether he is related to Leon is unknown.
Owen's Note

Owen Grady wrote a note for Claire Dearing when a Dud Egg failed to hatch.

## In TSJWFEW

Owen's note appears in An Endearing Moment. Owen wrote Claire a note to console her when she was upset about a dud egg, which he found unusual as dud eggs are fairly common. To his surprise, after he brought her home when she was drunk at Alfonzo's, he found that she had kept the note. He intended to write a second one, but recalling several insults she had given him hours earlier, he did not.

It is not known what Owen's note read.
Sarah Kolodinsky

Sarah Kolodinsky (aka Sarah the Mosasaur Trainer) was an employee at Jurassic World. She was known for her many talents. Neithhotep changed her into a Postodon in order to sell her to Verizon Wireless. She married Vivian and had a daughter, Alison, through dragon magic. Her talents included falconing, cat-declawing, unicycle riding, juggling, ghostbusting, piano, accordion, ballet, tap, jazz, modern, karate, kung fu, crossbow-firing, sword-fighting, pottery, cake-decorating, rapping, taxidermy, skateboarding, and hot air balloon piloting. She supported a child in Africa for many years.

## Trivia

* Sarah's favorite color was purple.

* Sarah was the first openly gay character to be featured in the main group.

* Sarah could recite the entirety of Moby Dick from memory.

* Sarah was a fan of Sonic the Hedgehog.

* In an original draft of TSJWFEW, Sarah was planned to undergo a sex change via magic.
* Sarah's hybrid design was based on an old prinbout from a Land Before Time game.
Pi

Pi was a blue stegoceratops that rode with 01 on the *Neptune* and later replaced him in his job.

## Biography

### Birth

Pi was created by InGen sometime after 01, who was created in 2989. He is speculated to be eight years old as of 3000, meaning he likely was created in 2992.

### On Board the *Neptune*

Along with 01 and several other dinosaurs (presumably Stegoceratops, as these seem to be the only dinosaurs in this universe), Pi was selected as a maintenance worker for the starship *Neptune*. He briefly met 01 before being transported to the ship in 3000, but was not interested in becoming friends with anyone.

Pi remained in cryosleep until 01's death in 3297. He was the ship's maintenance worker for a further three years, until the passengers were awakened. He briefly met Claire Dearing after she woke. Presumably, he went with them to colonize the new world.

## Personality

Pi was bitter, cynical, and unempathic even from an early age. He showed no care whatsoever for 01, and suspected that the company which owned the *Neptune* was anticipating a high suicide rate among the dinosaurs.
Rhinoceros

A black rhinoceros.

Rhinoceros were large mammals.

## Trivia

* There are five species of rhinoceros still alive today:
	+ *Ceratotherium simum*, the white rhino (which is actually brown or gray), the largest species; it has one long horn and one short one
	+ *Diceros bicornis*, the black rhino (which is actually the same color as the white rhino, rendering its name pointless); both parts of its scientific name mean "two horns," so that's important to know
	+ *Rhinoceros unicornis*, the Indian rhino, which has only one horn, and is wrinkly and bumpy and almost bald, but is nearly as big as a white rhino
	+ Rhinoceros *sondaicus*, the Javan rhino, which also has only one horn and is way smaller; there are about sixty left alive
	+ *Dicerorhinus sumatrensis*, the Sumatran rhino, which lives in high altitudes and is almost extinct; it's the smallest and hairiest rhino
* All rhinos are endangered.
* Many extinct rhinos include the woolly rhino, the hornless running rhinos (including indricotheres), and the aquatic rhinos.
* Originally, rhinos evolved in North America before traveling to Eurasia and Africa.
Penumbra Shadesberg

Penumbra was a survivor of the Great Separation. She watched her mother die in front of her eyes, and vowed to live to see her people liberated. She wished for eternal life and was granted this by the genie. She sold her soul to the Bull in order to obtain a magic wand and crystal ball. She was killed by Claire, who drove her horns into her eyes. She was later rescued with the rest of the Stegoceratops, but instead chose to stay behind to save Monsanto. She escaped, and lived on Claire's property in peace for many years. She had twins with Monsanto after being appointed Queen of the Stegoceratops.

## Trivia

* Penumbra's favorite food was potato salad.
Owen's Public Domain Moo-sical

Julia Spurr (mentioned)

*"I may have called her a cow."*
—Owen Grady(**src**)
Owen's Public Domain Moo-sical was part of the series bridging TSJPFEW and TSJWFEW. It was commonly regarded as the worst short until the publication of Stegoceratops Milk.

## Plot

Claire wakes up with a hangover due to the drinking she partook in during the previous episode. She is met by Zara, who is confused by Claire's unusual behavior. As Claire sends Zara to get a cup of water for her, she hears someone singing in the courtyard below her office window, and recognizes Owen's voice. The song he sings compares Claire to a cow and insults her repeatedly, and Claire responds by throwing a pencil at his head.

Owen visits Barry to air his feelings. Barry asks what happened after Owen walked Claire home to her office, and Owen asserts that nothing happened between them. He says he's done being obsessed with Claire; Barry encourages him not to give up, and that maybe he's going about it in the wrong way. Owen expresses that though he knows there isn't much hope, he can't help but keep trying, and Barry suggests that he allow Claire to decide for herself to come to him rather than pursue her endlessly. Owen admits that he insulted Claire, and Barry continues to tease him.

## Trivia

* The story began with the title "Stegoceratops Takes Manhattan", but was rewritten for fear of breaking the continuity of Claire's relationship with her sister, as the story was published before the release of *Jurassic World*. It was later planned to be a musical using songs from Disney's *Beauty and the Beast*, but this violated the rules of certain FanFiction websites.
Parks

Parks was the currency of Jurassic Park.

## Coins

* Elkay was on the dollar coin, which was dubbed "Elkie".
* Ellie was on the fifty cent coin.
* Owen was on the twenty five cent coin.
* *La Estrella* was on the ten cent coin.
* Claire was on the five cent coin.
* The one cent coin was originally nonexistent, but was created to honor Penumbra.
Owen Gets A Flu Shot

Owen Gets A Flu Shot was a PSA about vaccination. It was one of several midquels to The Silliest Jurassic World FanFiction Ever Written.

## Plot

Claire and Lily return home from a trip to the pharmacy, where they received a flu shot. Owen asks how the visit turned out. Claire informs him that the pharmacist was surprised to see that she was a dinosaur, but went through with the vaccination anyway. She then admits that Lily punched the pharmacist out of displeasure. Lily whines about her aching shoulder. Claire assures her that it’s only temporary and sends her off to bed.

When Owen asks if the vaccination will be effective, Claire informs him that Ellie told her it would work. Owen is soon made nervous by her recounting of the event, and he reveals that he has never had a vaccination. He had avoided needles in the navy by claiming that he was allergic to eggs, and thus could not receive shots. He asserts that he will never get vaccinated, but Claire drags him to the pharmacy regardless.

They are greeted by the doctor, and begin to fill out forms. Owen attempts to delay the process unsuccessfully. Claire comforts him, and he asks her questions about the shot. The doctor returns, and Owen is ushered into a separate room. He sits down, and is startled when the doctor sanitizes his arm. When he sees the doctor preparing the needle, he panics and rushes out to meet Claire. She assures him that the shot is necessary, and accompanies him inside once more. She comforts him as he’s vaccinated. He’s given a Power Rangers Band-Aid and is instructed to wait ten minutes before leaving. After eyeing a bowl of lollipops, the doctor allows him to take one. Claire and Owen walk home, and he asks if they can return next year. She agrees.

## Trivia

* The story takes place in winter, which is the time of year when the flu is most likely to spread due to people remaining indoors.
Orange

Orange was Robin's pet cat. He was a ginger Persian with green, strabismic eyes. Robin adopted him when she was a child. Orange died from kidney disease and was buried on Isla Nublar.

## Biography

### Youth

Robin adopted Orange when she was a child, and Orange was probably just a kitten. According to Robin, Orange may have been inbred.

### To Isla Nublar

When Robin moved to Isla Nublar to work in Jurassic Park, Orange came with her. In 1995, Orange was still alive despite having been with Robin since her childhood (probably around twenty years).

### Isla Nublar Theropod Revolution

Ian Malcolm and Alan Grant met Orange in the summer of 1995. She yowled along with Robin when she shouted the Camp Mihkwaskikanew cheer, but hid under the fridge when Blitzen and the other *Bambiraptors* arrived.
Iron

***Information on this page is accurate for version v.709 and can differ from the current info in v.796.***

## General Information

### Version debut

701

An iron ingot. It is used for various recipes and for making steel later on, it is rather cheap as it's just made from scrap and charcoal, it can also drop in small amount from high level melee bandits.

## **Appearance**

A rectangular ingot with in a dark grayish tone. The ingot itself is heavily scuffed and dented.

## **Crafting**

 **Forge** *(click to expand/collapse)*

 Requires the following materials :
* Scrap x25
 Requires the following tools :
* Tool kit (tool)
* Forge chimney
 Results :
* Iron x5
* +40 experience

## **Trivia**

* From its weight, it can be assumed it is a rather small ingot.
* Iron ingots made their debut in v1.701
* judging from the colour, it is of rather high carbon content

## **See also**

* Steel
* Spring
Panther

Panthers were large felines.

## Trivia

* The word "panther" doesn't refer to a specific big cat, but one of several:
	+ The legendary heraldic panther, a mythological creature
	+ A cougar or mountain lion, particularly the Floridan subspecies
	+ Jaguars
	+ Leopards
	+ Melanistic (very dark-colored) variants of jaguars or leopards, called black panthers
	+ Leucistic (very light-colored) variants of jaguars or leopards, called white panthers
	+ Any member of the subfamily Pantherinae or the genus *Panthera*
Radioactive Shark Bite

Radioactive Shark Bites were unpleasant injuries. Presumably, such an injury could only be caused by being bitten by a shark which had already been heavily irradiated, maybe because it swam through a leaking nuclear reactor or something.

## In Moon La La Light

RSB's were brought up as a painful occurrence, but one which humans would be unlikely to worry about at any given moment. This is mentioned in an introductory monologue about suffering and has no further bearing on the story.
Rebecca Glass

Rebecca Glass was a scientist during the period leading into the Plastic Age. She attempted to promote a purebred human race by exposing and exaggerating the dangers of the Volatus Virus. Her experimentation led to the integration of herbivores among sentient dinosaur species. She was accidentally changed into a Pentaceratops when she fell against a table of chemicals, losing sentience in the process. Years later, she was rehabilitated and put on trial. She was given a job at a local library, where she remained for many more years before meeting Blauna.

## Before Ancient Futures

Rebecca was a scientist working for InGen. Due to her prejudice against dinosaurs, she created a formula that would change humans into non-sentient herbivores. She used this serum to terrorize the citizens of New World City before eventually changing her right hand man, Bo Steel.

## Trivia

* Rebecca was based on Megan Mullally.
* Her last name comes from a chuckwagon racer.
Robyn Smyth

Robyn Smyth was an employee at Jurassic World. She was the alternate form of Robin Smith. Wu 2 changed Robyn into an *Apatosaurus* against her will and she was slaughtered by the *Indominus rex*. She owned a cat named Tangerine.

## Biography

### Employment at Jurassic World

Robyn Smyth was hired to work in Jurassic World. It is unknown if she worked in Jurassic Park, like her alternate universe counterpart Robin Smith.

Robyn believed that Claire Dearing had "the runs," a rumor which Trixie Von Dixie helped to spread. In actuality, Claire was hiding to keep her Stegoceratops transformations a secret.
Pachycephalosaurus

*Pachycephalosaurus* was a herbivorous dinosaur. InGen cloned them, but they weren't in the original Jurassic Park.

## In TSJPFEW

During their second night on Isla Nublar, Ian Malcolm asks Alan Grant if *Pachycephalosaurus* are dangerous, because they walk on two legs like a theropod. Alan says that they're herbivores even though they walk on two legs, to Ian's confusion.

## Trivia

* Characters mispronouncing *Pachycephalosaurus* is a running joke. Roland Tembo in *The Lost World: Jurassic Park* can't pronounce it, so he calls them Friar Tuck. Ian Malcolm in TSJPFEW calls them "Cephalopod" and "Pachydermosaurus."
Pelican

Pelicans were birds with big pouches in their beaks.

## In TSJPFEW

### The Silliest Jurassic Park FanFiction Ever Written

While repairing a tire, Jay Smith chases away some pelicans near a beach. This happens offscreen, and is mentioned later when Ellie Sattler realizes that Jay isn't frightening enough to scare all the pelicans away, and that they must have been fleeing something else. This foreshadows the appearance of some Baryonyx.
Pantydraco

*"It's a real dinosaur."*
—Dr. Ellie Sattler(src)
*Pantydraco* was a dinosaur.

## In TSJPFEW

While traveling to Isla Nublar, Alan Grant mentions *Pantydraco* as a humorous dinosaur name, much to the amusement of Ian Malcolm.

## Trivia

* The *Panty* in *Pantydraco* is short for Pant-y-ffynnon, which is Welsh for "hollow of the spring." This refers to the quarry where the dinosaur was found.
Recurring Jokes and Phrases

This is a page for repeated phrases and concepts, used either as plot points or throwaway gags. (Not sure how to format this page so this'll be the rough draft).

Shut up, Wu.

A warm wind.

Destined to fail.

You are amazing.

Shut up. I hate you. / Say something. I love you.

Fat, Green, and Ugly.

A particularly daring leap.

Descended from the sky.
Owen's Shoes

*"They are dusty, rugged, and full of holes. The elegant form of Claire's shoes stands in stark contrast to their primal shape. The man's shoes do not make him look tall, nor do they make him look particularly fancy. Their coloring is uneven, probably due to the oil from some sort of vehicle. Judging by the loose bows, the owner of the boots is not very good at tying regular knots."*
—Narrative(src)
Owen Grady owned a pair of shoes that were in poor condition, according to Claire Dearing's standards.

## In TSJPFEW

Owen usually wore shoes.

One particular pair of shoes, specifically boots, was featured in A Day In The Life Of Claire's Shoes, where Owen's shoes and Claire's shoes touched for a moment before they parted ways. In this instance, he wore a pair of worn-out dusty shoes with loose knots tied on them.
Pleiades

The Pleiades as seen from Earth.

A map of the Pleiades.

The Pleiades was a cluster of stars in the Taurus constellation.

## Trivia

* The Pleiades are also known as the Seven Sisters, Messier 45 (M45), or the Maia Nebula.
* The nine brightest stars of the Pleiades are named after the Greek mythological Seven Sisters and their parents: Alcyone, Atlas, Electra, Maia, Merope, Taygeta, Pleione, Celaeno, and Sterope/Asterope.
Owen's Castle

Owen owned a castle in France.

## Features

* Garden with shed and two fountains (one small, one large).
* Foyer with fireplace and bookshelves.
* Room in basement to conceal mirrors.
* Kitchen with pantry.
* Dining room with ten foot long table.
* Claire's guest room.
* Owen's room (with balcony overlooking the nearby village).
* Various halls with suits of armor, paintings, tapestries, and handelabras.
* Wardrobe room.
* Bathroom.
* Laundry room.
* Organ room.
* Ballroom.
Parasaurolophus

Parasaurolophus was a hadrosaur. It was one of the dinosaurs cloned by InGen for Jurassic Park.

## In TSJPFEW

Parasaurolophus still exist on Isla Nublar when the group arrives there in 1995.

While relaxing in the swimming pool, Ian Malcolm mistakenly says that the Parasaurolophus was a carnivore that would gore prey with its "horn," which Alan corrects (it's a crest, not a horn).

The Velociraptors feed on Parasaurolophus as one of their main sources of meat.
Tammy-Lynn Mueller

Tammy-Lynn was a woman who had a romantic interest in Owen. She ate doggy chow as a child. After assisting her father in saving Claire's life, the two women became friends. When Tammy-Lynn moved away from Tennessee, Claire was devastated.

## In Dung By The River

Tammy-Lynn is brought along with her father to save Claire's life. The two don't get along, but eventually, Claire entrusts Tammy-Lynn with her daughter, should she die. Tammy-Lynn finds herself worrying about Claire, and prays for her recovery. When Claire recovers, the two of them resolve their differences and become good friends.

## Trivia

* Tammy-Lynn is a smoker.
* Tammy-Lynn is objectively the most white trash name ever.
* Tammy-Lynn ate dog food as a child
Potato

Potatoes were root vegetables.

## In TSJPFEW

Robin Smith compares the way that John Hammond, Peter Ludlow, and Henry Wu are struggling for control of InGen to a game of hot potato, except each of them wants the potato, and the potato is filled with dinosaurs.

## Trivia

* Potatoes are used to make chips, French fries, and other food, making them completely irreplaceable.
Owen Grady

## Owen Grady Dearing

Owen Grady was the husband of Claire Dearing. He took her last name after marriage. He was transformed into an Indominus Rex and a Stegoceratops, and also a jerboa via magic wand. His father left him at a young age, and he vowed never to cry again after the event, a promise he first broke when Claire was stuck as a Stegoceratops. He earned antlers, wings, and a train. He became the King of the Beneath.

## In Owen Gets a Flu Shot

Owen is forced by Claire to get a flu shot.

## In Dung By The River

Owen accidentally poisons Claire with arsenic.

## Trivia

* Owen was allergic to strawberries.
* Gummy Bears gave Owen diarrhoea.
* Owen had a fear of needles.
* Owen was part Scottish.
* Owen disliked sorbet.
* Owen's favorite cookie was gingerbread.
* Owen enjoyed Froot Loops.
* Owen was not good at tying regular knots.
Pteranodon

*Pteranodons* were prehistoric reptiles. They were secondarily infected with the Volatus Virus. They could speak in simple language, and served as aerial taxis.

## In TSJPFEW

On the flight to Costa Rica, Ellie has a nightmare in which a *Tyrannosaurus* chases her through the jungle and she tries to get a *Pteranodon* to help her. It flies away, leaving her on her own. This is probably the Spirit *Pteranodon* that would appear to her later.

During their first night on Isla Nublar, Ellie has another nightmare about the *Tyrannosaurus* escape, and sees a *Pteranodon* again. It transforms into a swarm of mosquitoes.

A third time, Ellie has a dream about being chased by a *Velociraptor* in Jurassic Park's maintenance shed, and she sees the *Pteranodon* multiple times.

Claire Dearing dreams of a *Pteranodon* filling the role of a flying monkey from *The Wizard of Oz* in her Oz-themed dream.

## Trivia

* At least three different kinds of *Pteranodons* appear in the Jurassic Park film universes. They are not present in the novel, which has *Cearadactylus* instead.
* *Pteranodons* aren't dinosaurs. Almost everyone knows this by now, but it's still mandatory to point it out.
Outer Space

Outer Space was the area beyond Earth's atmosphere.

## In TSJPFEW

In the Jurassengers universe, the spaceship *Neptune* traveled through outer space to reach a new world for humans and dinosaurs to colonize.

## Trivia

* Outer space is often thought of as cold, but because it is so empty, it is nearly impossible to lose heat in space because there are so few particles to take your heat away.
Stan The Sanitation Man

*"Stan, the Sanitation Man! Throwing garbage in his can!"*
—Rhyme invented by Park employees(src)
Stan was a Jurassic Park janitor. He killed the original raptor chieftain with a shotgun.

## Biography

### Employment at InGen

Some time before 1995, Stan began working for InGen as a janitor.

### Isla Nublar Theropod Revolution

Stan's first involvement with the revolution was to clean up glass in the Visitors' Center that Ellie Sattler left after escaping through a window, having transformed into a *Tyrannosaurus rex* due to the Volatus Virus. Some of the blood from the scene was given to Henry Wu, who used it to finalize his research into the Volatus Virus.
Squid

The long-finned squid, Loligo forbesii

Squid were floppy ocean-things.

## Trivia

* Squids include the largest invertebrate animal known, the colossal squid.
* Around 75% of cephalopods caught by fisheries are squids.
* All parts of a squid are edible, except for the beak and pen. Yeah, you can eat the ink and eyeballs if you're into that kind of thing.
* Squid have eight arms and two tentacles. In the male, the left tentacle is used in mating and has a sperm delivery mechanism instead of suction cups.
* Not all squids have reproductive tentacles. Most deep-sea squids do not have these specialized tentacles. Instead, a male squid from the deep ocean will have a comically long penis. The exception to this is the giant squid, which has a comically long penis as well as an arm with reproductive function. When aroused, a squid penis can be as long as its head, mantle, and arms combined.
* The above-mentioned deep-sea squids have the second-longest penis when compared to overall body size of any animal, second only to the barnacle.
* Squid tentacles don't grow back.
* Squid can hear, but not very good.
* When some squids mature, their genitals grow so large that their digestive tract has to shrivel to compensate for it, and so squids don't live very long.
* As with all cephalopods, the squid's siphon (from which it jets ink or water) is also its butthole.
* Humboldt squid will eat you if they get the chance, and hunt in ginormous squads.
* Flying squids are a thing.
Tall Trees

Stegoceratopses in a slaughterhouse

Tall Trees was a short story recounting the circumstances under which the stegoceratops first became the victims of genocide.

## Plot

In ancient Cambodia, humans have formed a community that is more advanced than the neighboring provinces, which are cut off from the colony by a mountain range. The humans live in harmony with the stegoceratops, a race of hybrid dinosaurs who are thought to have been created by the gods. The two races, human and stegoceratops, are considered equal, but this changes when a long drought ravages the agricultural industry.

Humans begin encouraging the stegoceratops to plow the fields, giving their children less time for education. In the hope of restoring the colony’s former glory, a new leader is elected. The leader announces one night that the reason for the economic downturn is the laziness of the stegoceratops. He compares the skulls of both races to prove that the stegoceratops are less capable of intelligent thought. In the span of one to two years, news distribution becomes infused with anti-stegoceratops propaganda. Stegoceratops are accused of hoarding crops because of their physical need for more food. The properties of the stegoceratops are seized, and they are banned from doing business with humans.

In order to keep dinosaurs in their place, the leader proposes that they be made to work by force. They are shipped across the province and sold as slaves, or else put into extermination camps. Some humans are included in this process, as they have been deemed unfit for breeding due to physical and mental abnormalities. There are signs of stegoceratops abuse, but these are largely ignored by most humans. Corporations are shown to turn a blind eye to the misuse of their products in favour of making a profit. Meat is shipped across the country, supposedly coming from murdered stegoceratops. Furthermore, stegoceratops are being experimented on in a grisly fashion.

More years pass, and the stegoceratops continue to suffer. In the camps, a few soldiers put in charge of burying dinosaur corpses begin to question their actions. They realize that although there are many differences between humans and stegoceratops, they are similar in many ways, and the humans are in fact killing their own kind.

## Trivia

* While the majority of the story references the Holocaust, there are also references to other genocides, most notably the Rwandan Genocide, which is referenced by the title of the short.
* Wala, having been elected in 1482, would have stayed in power until 1488. The numbers 14 and 88 are used as code by Nazis.
Simon Masrani

Simon Masrani was the owner of Jurassic World. After his death, his soul was captured in the soul pot, and was transferred into a helicopter. He later became an ant when he crashed into an ant hill. Using a hair from Zebil's tail, Elkay changed him into a tiny, white tiger. He grew to a normal size during the Bollywood Event, still retaining his title of King of the Fairies.
Spinosaurus

*Spinosaurus* were large theropods. InGen obtained their DNA without properly identifying them, and Henry Wu accidentally was transformed into one.

## Trivia

* *Spinosaurus* were actually semi-aquatic quadrupeds with two-humped sails, and June Wu was the first member of the Wu lineage to appear accurate to the real version.
Sperm Whale

Sperm whales were aquatic mammals.

## Trivia

* The sperm whale's name comes from the liquid wax in its head, which is called spermaceti. Whalers used to think it was sperm, but it isn't, because having sperm in your head would be kind of weird.
* The sperm whale's ancient relative, *Livyatan*, was way bigger and ate other whales.
The Phantom of the Opera

Phantom was a character from The Phantom of the Opera. Elkay rescued him during her reign, assigning him the task of watching over Fiction. He quickly formed a relationship with Elizabeth of Bioshock Infinite, which was discouraged by Elkay. Elkay gave him the title Majordomo before her exodus. Years later, Elkay turned him into a dragon by pushing him into a volcano. According to Neithhotep, he was intended to be called Israfil.
Spirit Pteranodon

The Spirit Pteranodon was a projection of Elkay that visited Ellie in dreams and hallucinations. It was wired into the InGen mainframe.

## Appearances

The Spirit Pteranodon appears several times to Ellie during her nightmares in The Silliest Jurassic Park FanFiction Ever Written. First, he appears and does not help her escape a *Tyrannosaurus rex* chasing her though the jungle of Isla Nublar. Second, he appears as Alan and Ian are attacked by Buttercup on the tour road, transforming into a cloud of mosquitoes. A third time, he appears inside the maintenance shed as Ellie tries to escape a *Velociraptor* attack.

## Trivia

* Although the Spirit Pteranodon was male, it was in fact a projection of a female character.
Spunkstride

*"Spinosaurids invented Spunkstride as a way to have a voice in the music industry."*
—Edith(src)
Spunkstride was a musical genre created by spinosaurids, with many of the major contributions coming from *Oxalaia* in particular.

## Information

Prior to the invention of the Spunkstride genre, spinosaurids were underrepresented in music. This was the first major contribution of spinosaurids to the music industry. While it is associated with spinosaurids in general, a *Spinosaurus* named Quacey attributes the genre's creation and development to the genus *Oxalaia*. Not much is known about the genre, though the etymology of its name (which essentially means "to walk with confidence") gives an idea of what its tone and themes might be like. Sol mentions that the trumpinet is not an original component of Spunkstride, and that contemporary artists are creating new subgenres which differ from older versions of the music.

According to Sol, much of the Spunkstride which plays on the radio in his day consisted of the newer forms rather than forms that remained true to the original music.

## In Moon La La Light

Sol expresses and interest in the genre, though Quacey claimed not to be a fan. Sol was looking into starting a club where Spunkstride music would be featured. A woman in the bar interrupts them to accuse Sol of cultural misappropriation by contributing to the Spunkstride genre.
The Earth

Earth was the third planet from the Sun. It was the homeworld of humans and dinosaurs.

## In TSJPFEW

Earth is the setting of most TSJPFEW stories, though many alternate-universe versions of it appear.

In the original TSJPFEW, Robin Smith wishes that Earth would spin faster so that midnight would come sooner.

Humans and dinosaurs leave Earth in the version of it that appears in Jurassengers.
Simon (driver)

Simon was an employee of InGen in Jurassic Park. He was killed by raptors.

## Biography

In 1995, Simon was the driver of an RV carrying the team that captured Charlie. While he was able to temporarily escape Charlie's pack by activating the speed radar sirens, he crashes the RV in an intersection and is pinned to his seat by a log they crash into. His coworkers are unable to free him and leave him behind, where the raptors kill him.

He is mourned by the scientists, so it appears he was close friends with many of them.
The Beneath

The Beneath was a realm created by Neithhotep to imprison enemies of Asterpara. It was maintained by the Bull for many years. Later, when Karen Mitchell was imprisoned in it, she attempted to transfer the domain to Claire Dearing, only to have Owen Grady take her place.

## Features

* The Beneath was a cavelike environment. It had stalagmites, stalactites, and crystal formations.
* There were various water features, including underground rivers and lakes.
* Foliage such as golden trees grew in the Beneath, but only through sinister magic.
Strontium

Strontium crystals

### Uses

Prevents x-ray emission in cathode ray tubesUsed to identify the origin of bones

Helpful in sediment research

Used to make red fireworks

Makes toothpaste for sensitive teeth

Radiopharmaceutical painkiller for bone cancer

Cheap power source for radioisotope thermoelectric generators

### Source

Mined

Strontium was the 38th element on the periodic table. It burned red.
Starfish

Starfish were the souls of miscarried babies.

## In TSJPFEW

### The Silliest Jurassic Park FanFiction Ever Written

Ellie Sattler is revealed to have a phobia of all echinoderms, but especially starfish. Alan Grant has teased her about it, but would never make it widely known. She is ashamed of her irrational fear. This is first demonstrated when she washes up on an Isla Nublar beach with a pink starfish clinging to her face.

## Trivia

* The first starfish are known to have lived 450 million years ago, but fossils are rare because they don't have bones and disintegrate when they die. This suggests that pregnancy and thus miscarriage had evolved by this time.
* Starfish don't have brains, but their nervous systems are complex. Each arm thinks for itself and they all kind of cooperate to move the body. If one arm detects food before the others, it will take over and drag the others toward the food.
The New World

Stegoceratopses

Various dinosaurs

The New World was a nickname for the planet from Jurassengers.

## History

The New World was discovered by humans from Earth at a time in history when the population was growing too large for just Earth to sustain. An unnamed corporation designed a spaceship, the *Neptune*, to travel there and set up a colony. Both humans and dinosaurs would colonize the planet. Over the course of three hundred years, the ship traveled to the new world, with the humans in cryonic sleep and one dinosaur at a time kept awake to maintain the ship. Most of these dinosaurs seem to have been Stegoceratopses.

During these three hundred years, teleportation was invented. This allowed interstellar colonization to proceed without using spaceships. Humans and the advanced technology invented since the *Neptune*'s launch were used to build a colony on the new world long before the original colonists arrived, making most of their intended jobs obsolete.

## Geography

Little information is given about the new world's geography or climate, but it is mentioned to have at least one ocean.

## Trivia

* The new world is not named within the story, but is based on the planet Homestead II from the film *Passengers*.