Mother Of The Year

(Theme Song)

Mia: (Singing) Catching babies... and give them hugs... we're soft and cuddly just like Pip and Freddy. Don't worry babies you're safe when we're together. You know we're gonna be friends forever! Mia Kitten tot adventurer, Mia Kitten tot adventurer. Hold my paw let's find adventure. Mia Kitten tot adventurer. Open up your arms and catch a hug!

(All baby animals giggled as a theme song ends)

Title: "Disney Junior's Mia Kitten"

(Fade to the episode title with a picture of Mia, Lucky And Spike And Angelica With Their New Babies Being Interviewed)

Mia: Mother Of The Year

(Episode Started With Mia, Angelica Who Gave Birth To One Puppy Boy And Two Baby Kittens, Spike Who Us Now A Father And Lucky All At The Table)

Angelica: Who Loves Her Babies? Mommy Does Mommy Does! (The Baby Puppy And Kittens Giggle)

J.P.: Look, sweetheart, you can't spend

every moment with Nicky.

You have to get over this

separation anxiety.

You went through it with Lucky's Pet About His Babies.

Captain Beakmen: Yes, and look at how well

he turned out. (She Points To Lucky)

Lucky: kitchie-kitchie-coo-coo

Spot: Dada!

Mia: You must be very proud.

J.P.: Captain Beakmen, sweetheart......I love you and I miss you. And that's why we're going to have lunch this afternoon at La Teau.

Captain Beakmen: Oh, I'd love to, honey.

Vivian: But I don't think Nicky

is ready for restaurants yet.

Captain Beakmen: I was talking about us, Vivian. We're going to kiss. We're going to have a romantic, baby-free good time.

Mia: And We Also Get To Help Angelica And Spike Babysit The Little Ones.

J.P.: That's Right, Mia! Big

Daisy: Mama.

J.P.: What did you say?

Lucky: Oh, I Think Daisy said: "Beg, puppy"......to my dog, Spike.. Fetch, Spike! (Throws The Bally Ball Over To Spike) He's gone now.

J.P.: Captain, honey, can I speak to you a minute, please?

Captain Beakmen: this a good idea, honey?

Do you think we can rely on the kids

to take care of Angelica And Spike's B-A-B-I-E-S?

J.P.: Who's Babies?

Angelica And Spike: OUR BABIES.

Captain Beakmen: Well, his name is Nicky. I'm staying home.

J.P.: Come on, Mia And Lucky will help take care

of the babies.

Captain Beakmen: Well, Maybe We're Right! (Gives Mia A Kiss) Love You Mia! Mommy Will See You Later!

Mia: Not to worry, Mommy. We'll care for the

children as though they were our very own.

We'll draw straws for the little babies.

Lucky: Short one loses.

Mia: Oh, that would be you, Lucky.

Lucky: Bar-har-har-hark, but I've got a puppy class.

Spike: Well, wait a minute, I've got a job.

Spot: I've got a baby match! Bark Bark!

Angelica: I've got...

Mia: A date with Your Mommy!

Person: Two cappuccinos, please.

Mia: Well, I'm hoping you like it

dark, hot, sweet...

...and with a spoon in it.

Person: Could you hurry it up, please?

I told that guy over there

I'd buy him some coffee.

Poor Todd. Trying to raise his baby

all alone, hold down a job, go to school.

I think it's just adorable.

You do? I'm the same, baby.

I mean, I'm holding down a job

and going to school.

Mia: About that baby part, if you ain't

doing nothing later, I'm...

Person: Mia, you've gotta help me.

I took Nicky shopping,

but I can't try anything on.

I mean, he just lies there

watching me get undressed...

...and making these tiny little

drool bubbles and...

He reminds me of Trevor.

- So you take him.

- Wait, wai... Whoa, hold up, girl.

I'm working this place by myself.

Jackie's at an away game.

And I ain't got no time

for no " give me my bottle...

...and change my didy."

"Wipe my booty."

Oh, Will, your little boy

is just adorable.

Well, like padre, like nino,

you know what I'm saying?

All right, break it up.

Move on. Nothing to see here.

Show's over.

Beat it!

- Hi.

- Hi, hey.

I'm Candace.

Could I get a picture of you

and your son together?

Oh, yeah, sure.

How do you manage

being a single father?

Doesn't it get lonely?

Well...

You know, the nights is kind of bad.

You know, because I have to be both

Mommy and Daddy...

...to little Willie Junior here

since...

Since Tirisha died.

That's it. I'm not gonna stand

another minute and listen...

- Hey! Isn't that who played Greg Brady?!

- Where? Hey, Greg, wait up!

You are quite a guy, Will.

Just tell me everything about you.

You mean, you want to be our friend?

Yeah.

Hey, little Willie,

we made a new friend.

And she can sleep over

any time she wants to.

Hi, honey, your dad and I just had

the most romantic lunch.

Romantic? I don't mean

to be critical, Vivian...

...but you did mention the baby,

what, three or four dozen times?

It was so romantic when

you asked that strolling violinist...

...to play my favorite song.

Yes.

And what did you request?

"The Wheels on the Bus

Go Round and Round."

Vivian.

We used to go to a restaurant...

...and not even be able

to make it to the table.

You remember the cloakroom

at Mario's Peruvian?

Excuse me, but when did I get

old enough to hear this?

Excuse me.

Geoffrey, where's the baby?

The baby?

The baby.

Actually, Miss Hilary insisted

on taking him out for the afternoon.

And since the poor girl's still

so depressed about Trevor...

...I hadn't the heart to refuse.

Hi, everybody.

Geoffrey, could you give me a hand?

I left the most important thing in the car.

Hilary. You left the baby

alone in the car?

Mother, I would never do that.

How irresponsible do you think I am?

Well, then where's the baby?

I don't know.

Mom, you have to see

these earrings I bought.

- The little diamonds spell out...

- Hilary!

How did you know?

- Hey, hey, hey.

- My baby, come to Mommy.

Coming, Mommy.

Well, wait a minute, Will.

How did you get hold of the baby?

Wasn't Hilary supposed to watch him?

- Hilary?

- What?

Oh, God, it's not like

I left him at Sizzler...

...Dad.

Last time I do you people any favors.

Don't worry, Nicky,

Mommy's got you now.

The only way I'm gonna get attention

here is if I start wearing diapers.

No, Uncle Phil, you got at least

five years before you need them.

Vivian.

After what you did, I don't even know

how you could look me in the eye.

Easy, like this:

Hey.

Look, I won't let you use Nicky

for evil anymore.

Next time I'm going

to the authorities.

Thanks for the warning,

Captain Weenie.

- Will Smith?

- Yeah.

Well, hello.

Buy you lunch today, Daddy?

Yeah, sure.

Man, this is an embarrassment

of riches.

But what about me?

You just an embarrassment, man.

Hi, guys.

Jackie, what's up? Let me get that.

How was the game?

- We won.

- Ta-da.

So, what's been going on here?

Anything unusual?

No, no, actually,

it's been pretty quiet.

Good, cool.

So before I forget, would you

sign the school paper for me?

Right next to your picture.

Oh, yeah, sure, I don't see why n.. (The Newspaper Shows Mia With Daisy, Spot And Beauty Being Hold Onto, Mia Is Reading What's Happening With Herself)

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Daisy, Spot And Beauty Cry)

Chloe: Oh, boy, are you in trouble Best Friend. And I'd like to say, "Hey, I'm here for you"......but, heck, I'd be lying.

Mia: Look, it's just this little blurb

in some dumb preschool newspaper! Freeze. Don't be coming over here with no attitude. This ain't my fault.

Sofia: Whose was it then?

Mia: Well, yours.

Sofia: What?

Mia: You heard me. I'm saying, you know I can't be trusted. You wouldn't have left me here, none of this would ever happen.

Sofia: That's it. I didn't come all the way here

from Enchantia to hear this. I am tired! Get out of my face!

Mia: Don't be up in my grill!

Sofia: You need to shut... I'm out of here!

Mia: Excuse me, excuse me! (Shouts) YOU KNOW WHAT?!? YOU AIN'T..

Sofia And Mia: (Shouting And Yelling) NEVER GONNA CHANGE! I'M GETTING THE LAST WORD! OH, NO, YOU'RE NOT! OH, YES, I AM! DAMIN! (Mia Waks Away As Sofia Storms Back To The Door With Anger)

Photo Graphing Lady: Mia, hi.

Mia: What?! Hey, how are you doing? That's right. A beautiful woman HERE TO SEE ME!

Photo Graphing Lady: I should've told you I'm on the paper. I Hope you're not mad.

Mia: Mad? No, I ain't mad.

Photo Graphing Lady: Then why are you yelling?

Mia: I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I got...

I got a slight hearing problem.

Deficiency, you know,

from my night job at the target range.

Oh, you poor thing.

Listen, I got a class now.

Could you meet me here

tomorrow morning, say, around 9:00?

- Yeah, sure.

- Cool.

Because I'd love to see

that baby again.

I think he has plans.

Oh, well, that's too bad

because I was thinking...

...maybe the three of us could do

something really special together.

And then while he's taking

his little nappy, who knows?

Well, he just a baby.

How important could his plans be?

- You're so cute.

- I know, I know, ain't I?

Okay, so I'll meet you here at 9:00

and you won't be sorry.

Oh, I know I won't be sorry...

...because I got me a woman!

All I need is me a baby.

- Hi, baby.

- Hello, dear.

Are you talking to me?

Of course I am.

I know I've been ignoring you lately.

So would you let me

make it up to you?

Maybe.

Oh, all right.

I've seen you both naked anyway.

Sweetheart, I have rented us a suite

at the Bel-Air Hotel for tonight.

Now, Carlton is gonna

take care of Nicky...

...so I can take care of you.

All right, that's it.

That's it. I'm tired of this. Y'all two

need some time alone, okay?

You gonna leave Nicky here.

You gonna go get a fly hotel suite.

You gonna chill. You ain't

coming back here till tomorrow.

Come on, let's go pack.

Philip, this is so wonderful.

I have been working so hard,

taking care of the baby night and day.

Yes, well, you just lay back and relax

and let Daddy take care of you.

Dim the lights, Vivian.

Yes, baby.

You know, sweetheart.

For the longest time,

I've had the feeling...

...that the fire in our marriage

had gone out.

But now I know...

...that the flame still burns.

Can't get enough of your love, baby.

Vivian?

Vivian.

Vivian.

Okay, look, Nicky,

this is very important.

Come on, repeat after me:

"Da Da"?

Oh, man.

Oh, hey, sorry, my man,

it's only 9:00.

Place doesn't open up till 10.

Oh, I'm sorry.

I kind of lost track of time

since I pawned my watch.

No, I don't need to bother

you with my problems.

No, hey, hold up, man,

it's cool. Here, have a seat right here.

There you go.

Got a little something for you

on the house.

- Thank you.

- Hey, least I can do, man.

You're my inspiration.

Caught you.

Oh, no, it's Captain Weenie

and his bag of tricks.

You're despicable.

I went to check up on my little brother

this morning and what did I find?

A zucchini. A zucchini, Will.

Well, I've had enough

of your twisted charade.

Hey, man, what are you doing?

Taking you down, mister.

I'm calling Mom and Dad

at the Bel-Air Hotel.

You got change for a dollar?

Oh, no, see, you gotta

buy something.

Okay, give me a pack of gum.

Sorry, we're closed.

Well, there's a world of change

out there, mister...

...and I'm going to find it.

Good morning, Will.

I'm so glad you could make it.

And little Willie too.

Yeah, we came here

straight from church.

What's up with that special

somethin'-somethin' you promised me?

- Okay, close your eyes.

- Okay.

Now, I knew you wouldn't agree to this

if I hadn't kept it a surprise.

A surprise?

What you talking about?

- Surprise!

- Hey, man.

Will Smith, you are live here

on the Hart File Show.

I'm your host, Jake Maxwell.

And this is ULA's Father Of The Year.

Guess you're pretty excited,

huh, Will?

Sorry, we're closed.

Be open at 10.

Yeah, you better wake up, Vivian.

Olive Oyl is looking awfully good

right now.

Oh, sweetie, I am sorry I fell asleep

last night.

But guess what.

I'm wide awake now.

Quit it, quit it.

I am not in the mood.

Just move. You're blocking Bluto.

I'm gonna go freshen up.

Why don't you turn on

some more of that music.

Oh, yeah, right.

Will Smith, what's it like being

a single father here in L.A.?

You know, I'm saying, you know,

it ain 't easy.

You know, being

a single father like me.

But little Willie... Will... Willie Junior

here makes everything worthwhile.

- Did you see my...?

- Let's dance, Vivian, huh?

- Oh, Philip, what in the world...?

- Nothing. Nothing.

That's my baby.

That's my zucchini.

Daddy Will, the Hart File wants

to make your life a little easier.

So here's a year's supply

of baby products for your son.

Oh, this is ridiculous.

What does he know about babies?

This is his idea of a baby.

Get that fruitcake out of here.

Hey!

Listen, I don't deserve all this stuff.

That's right, young fella,

you deserve a whole lot more.

So how's about a holiday in Hawaii?

Oh, look, I can't...

I'm sorry, did you say Hawaii?

Will, if it's not too painful,

could you tell the folks at home...

...a little bit about Tirisha?

Who?

Tirisha, your son's mother.

That Tirisha. Yes, she's dead now.

I met her after I got back

from fighting them oil fires, in Kuwait.

You know, and my hair,

my eyebrows and everything...

...had just started growing back.

General Powell said to me:

"Yo, homey, you need

to get down with a little R and R...

...because you're looking

a little singed."

So in China... He sent me to China.

And then that's where we met.

It was in a little-known

province called...

...Rae Dawn Chong.

And...

Well, sayonara.

Come on, Will, could you tell us

more of your touching story?

I'll just take him out.

But, no, no. Hold... Hold up

a second, man.

Look, by a show of hands here...

...how many of y'all

got a sense of humor, huh?

All right, look, I ain't no

father of the year.

I'm not even a father.

I made all of this stuff up.

And I'm kind of good at that.

This is my cousin Nicky.

And I don't deserve

all these gifts.

But this dude here,

this guy here, I mean...

He's the real single father

with the real problems.

Give him all the stuff.

Hawaii too?

No, homey, I thought I'd

hang on to Hawaii, you know...

Hawaii too.

And that's another heartwarming

moment from...

...the Hart File.

Are we off?

Somebody get me a drink.

You creep.

Just wait till you see what I write

about you in tomorrow's paper.

But, baby, I...

See?

I can tell the truth.

I'm saying, you know,

maybe there's a little hope for me yet?

Very little.

Will, I'm out of here. I just want

to say thank you one more time.

Hey, no problem, man. It actually

makes me feel good...

...to do something for somebody

who needed it.

I was starting to feel stank

claiming that as my baby and everything.

Yeah, I know what you mean.

See...

...this ain't my kid either.

Aloha.

Oh, see, that's so wrong.

You know, Will, if you had pulled a stunt

like this when you were in high school...

...God knows what

I would've done.

Why, I might've done

something like this:

I went to check on my little brother

and you know what I found?

A zucchi... A zucchini.

What? I'm sorry, I didn't hear

what you found.

A zucchini, Will.

Good luck, Captain Weenie.