Cupid's Poo (La Belle Dame sans Merci)

It has been a full cycle of strenuous tail twisting and fin flapping, but the multicolored shark is STILL stuck headfirst in a pile of hardened afterburner grease. His muffled cries can be hardly be heard from the street, which is probably why Sky Byte has still received no help. Either that, or people just find the situation too repelling to assist him.

Chromia has had a lot on her mind lately and it has not left her of particularly helpful or cheery disposition. When she leaves off the group of recruits she has spent last better part of the solar cycle shouting at, it is not in an improved temper. She strides through the streets on long, directed strides, and almost walks right past the pitiful whimpers of the variegated shark stuck in the muck. Her aural receptors don't quite catch up to her as she crosses the mouth of the alley beside the Decagon, not until she's already past; there, she stops, blinks, and turns around to look up the side of the road, where she is confronted by the sight of Sky-Byte. She stands there for a moment looking a little blank.

The multi colored shark is screaming, "Help, help!" as he has been for the past cycle, but it pretty much just sounds like. "Hmmgrkk!! Hmmgrrkk!!" as his tail waves helpless back and forth.

"What in Primus's name." Chromia strides forward on heavy thunks to investigate the thrashing shark and the sticky mess he is trapped in. "What /is/ all this?"

Yup. It is what it looks like. A multicolored shark stuck in a pile of poop. And from the looks of it, he's been stuck here for a quite a long time.

Chromia looks repulsed. She encircles the shark and the pile with an expression that splits between that, and baffle. Once on the other side, she kicks at it, hard, with one foot. Chromia, problem solving.

Amazingly, her kick loosens the shark somewhat. He wiggles more, his tail waving more frantically this time. Is he going to be freed from the pile of poop!?

Chromia braces one long-fingered hand on the wall of the building in a scrape of metal on metal, balancing her weight so that she can give the pile of poop a heartier kick. It's possible the shark is just benefiting from Chromia's desire to kick something really hard.

This does the trick. The hardened afterburner grease gives way, exploding upward from Chromia's kick as it crumbles. Sky Byte pops out of the pile of poop like a daisy springing from the ground.

Little yellow robo-birds are flying around his head, and his optics resemble the spirals of a lollipop. "Gghhhh.." He moans, still dazed.

Chromia stares down at him, her hand still braced against the supporting wall, with her gaze narrowed in minor consternation. At length, she says: "What?"

Sky Byte shakes his head and the little yellow robo-birds disappear. He looks around and his optics land on Chromia. "OOOH!" He cries, and suddenly, his optics aren't lollipops anymore, they cater to this shape <3 and are bright red. He protoforms and leaps up, optics wide. "I'VE BEEN RESCUED BY A GODDESS!" he cries.

He glomps her, then kisses her. ON THE LIPS.

This is not behavior to which Chromia typically responds well. Most of her personal defensive training does not necessarily apply to somebody whose physicality is so distinctly piscine, but that does not appear to stop her from attempting to improvise with violence. "/Get off/--" she splutters, cracking elbow first into his frame.

"Oww!" The multicolored shark cries, falling backwards when she elbows him. "Alas, she is heartlessly beautiful. And there she lulled me asleep, And there I dream'd? Ah! woe betide! The latest dream I ever dream, On the cold hill's side. I saw pale kings and princes too, Pale warriors, death-pale were they all; They cried? La Belle Dame sans Merci, Hath thee in thrall!" he moans, clinging to her arm desperately.

When the elbow gambit doesn't work, Chromia turns his clamp onto her arm into something she can use, or at least, makes the attempt. She backs up a pace, lowers her head, and then hurls herself and her attendant shark at the wall of the building. Her answer to his eloquence is probably best transcribed somewhere along the lines of, "Gnyaugh!" It's so hard to spell some of her noises.

The shark howls in pain and lets go of her arm. "Why must love be sooo painful!" He moans. A fountain of low grade energon spring out of his optics, showering the fem in pink sticky gunk.

"Ugh," Chromia says. She backs up several steps, transforming to her vehicle mode in a roar of cranky engine, spinning tires rapidly in a shriek of rubber as if to dissolve some of the spray by new friction, roaring neutral on her kickstand rather than immediately speeding off into the city. "What is /wrong/ with you?"

"As BEAUTIFUL as she is cruel!" he howls, falling to his knees and staring at the sky. "Why is the universe so unmerciful...!"

"Yeah, well, you're pretty lucky I didn't just /kill you/, creepy fish thing," Chromia retorts, kicking into reverse and weaving backward a good few feet like a bike moving to get a running start before a leap or something. "Should have left well enough alone. Object lesson in mind my own /business/."

Sky Byte merely transforms and follows her. "What?! Y-you wouldn't!!" He shakes his helm. "No, no, this is how she SPEAKS LOVE. In REVERSE. How poetic! She adores me!" He cries, his optics going <3 again.

"That's just disgusting," the motorcycle tells the shark in very serious tones. Chromia slams into forward gear and zips forward at high acceleration, zero to sixty in -- well, it's a good thing there's nobody's neck to break.

Oh man, the shark has jet boosters, so he manages to follow her, still. He doesn't quite keep up, but she isn't going to lose him just yet. "Come back my love! We can hold hands as the sun sets! We can sleep on the same fluffy pillow while eating cake!" Sky Byte swoons.

"I'll crack your chassis and then smash your innards flat," Chromia roars over her shoulder amidst the powerful growl of her engine as she roars and wheels over the pavement. Where is she going? It's not like she's plotted a course anywhere in particular. Wherever /away/ is, that's where.

"No!! Come back! She loves me, she loves me not, she loves me...!" The shark has picked up a random bit of metal and is stripping it apart slowly. "My love is like the wind, she plays hard to get, and it absolutely BLISSFUL!"

What Chromia has to say to this as she roars along, partly difficult to catch on the wind of her passing, is also mostly just swearing and it's not even all that creative as swearing goes.

Unfortunately, Sky Byte is so BLINDED by his love for Chromia that he fails to see a large wall right in his way. He crashes into it unceremoniously, and knocks himself out. The little yellow robo-birds return to float around his flattened helm.