RQG 171 - The Bow Bar

## Content Warnings

Body dysmorphia/dysphoria, mind/body swapping, disorientation, innuendo, alcoholism/addition/withdrawal, alcohol consumption

## Summary

Join Alex, Helen, Bryn, Lydia and Ben as they take a break from all the chaos to experience Wilde's latest project.

This week Hamid designs a red carpet outfit, Zolf looks for a sponge, Cel outlines some scientific plans, and Azu becomes a bowling ball of death.

## Synopsis

[See the list of who is bodyswapped where here]

Time continues to pass as everyone acclimates to being in different bodies; Wilde, meanwhile, has begun setting something up in the bow of the ship, which the party starts to notice at the same time. He’s brought up some materials from around the ship - canvas, ropes, etc., all stuff that hasn’t been being used while on the journey. He will examine what he has, return to grab more, and then examine the pile again, repeating this process a few times. He’s also got about every bottle he could find.

Zolf finally asks what’s up, and Wilde doesn’t really explain, saying that he’s just busy. Zolf pushes for more clarification, and Wilde says that he’s decorating something. This still doesn’t really answer the question; Zolf continues to try and get at what Wilde is actually doing, and Wilde continues to answer in a roundabout fashion. Eventually, Zolf asks if Wilde is going to put on a play, which Wilde denies, saying he doesn’t have the space for a one-man show. Zolf asks if it’s improv, adding that he hates improv, and Wilde goes on about the benefits of improv before Zolf asks, point-blank, what Wilde is working on. Wilde sighs, and then finally confesses that he’s trying to make the bar area nice. Zolf offers to help, and Wilde tells him that he needs as much spongey material as he needs; Zolf heads off to the kitchen.

The rest of the party continues to watch as Wilde gets to work; Cel doesn’t completely understand Wilde’s system of organisation, but doesn’t question it. Hamid, meanwhile, realises that Wilde is trying to make the area into a cabaret bar, and is organising things by aesthetic rather than function. He asks Wilde if this is a good idea for where to put the bar, and Wilde hastily (and poorly) sets up some optics (upside down bottle holders that accurately measure amounts) that he balances with a counterweight so that regardless of what the ship’s doing, they’ll be fine. He then continues working, setting up a sort of veranda look with the bar, attempting to make materials stretch to create a canopy over the bar. Hamid gently tells Wilde that this is a nice idea, but that they just went through a terrible storm and that this all might be destroyed soon. Wilde tells him that he’s hammering everything down, and Azu directs Hamid to go and lean on it. Hamid does so, slightly confused and leaning on one of the tables. It does shift, slightly, and Hamid points out that he was leaning gently on it and that it won’t survive a storm. Azu suggests nailing everything down, which is what Wilde said he was going to do, but Hamid still doesn’t seem convinced, again saying that they maybe shouldn’t have this out on deck. Zolf reminds Hamid that there isn’t space anywhere else, and Hamid capitulates. Azu examines Wilde for a bit, and realises that Wilde is playing up being incompetent a bit. She doesn’t say anything about it or call it out.

Wilde then asks Cel for ideas; they say that they would be happy to help, but that they’re busy taking shifts leaning against the door of the antimagic cell to keep Carter from causing problems, along with keeping the boat afloat. They do, however, start listing ideas about counterweights for the bottles to keep them from breaking. Zolf cuts in at one point, asking if Cel wants the rest of them to come up with a schedule to take turns sitting against the door. Cel looks slightly disappointed at that, since they’ve been enjoying their chats with Barnes; Zolf picks up on the look and adds that they don’t have to, if Cel doesn’t mind. Hamid chimes in then, asking Cel about themselves and Barnes, and everyone seems curious about it while Cel stammers, saying that they just wanted to talk to him and learn more about him to build him a nice boat. They look baffled at everyone, and start building something. There’s a moment of pause, and then Zolf asks again if they want a rota created for the ‘sitting-against-the-door’ shift. Cel says yes, and Zolf says he’ll do it.

Hamid then pulls Azu and Zolf aside, mentioning that Sassraa is really struggling with all of this and he was wondering if Zolf had any more idea of what he could do for her. Zolf explains that they’re dealing with the physical symptoms of alcohol withdrawal, and that they’re on bedrest and are relieved of duty. He also adds that Hamid should check in on her and ensure that she’s alright. Hamid then turns to Cel, who was busy concentrating and seems a bit flustered, asking them if they would be willing to spend some time with Sassraa since they seem to respect Cel. Cel adds that they look up to Sassraa, thanks to the time they’ve spent together, and is more than happy to go spend some time with Sassraa and play some logic games with them. Azu pulls out some of the marbles she bought back in Hiroshima, and offers to give them to Sassraa as well; Cel takes the exact number they need and plans to give them to Sassraa later.

Wilde continues with his plans, as time skips forward about two days. Some of the other crew members will come up and offer help; Friedrich comes up and fiddles with the accordion, at one point. Slowly, it begins to take shape, and starts to come together. Hamid introduces Meerk and Natun to Friedrich, since those two kobolds enjoy music and noise. Meerk is on percussion, and Natun is on vocals (and, since they are in Carter’s body, everyone learns that Carter has a lovely singing voice).

Zolf continues to help out, along with making sure that people are fine in the wake of the bodyswap. He also checks in with Earhart, more so than everyone else since she’s been avoiding people, and informs her of what Wilde is currently working on. Earhart seems to be acting a lot better and as more of a captain than she had been previously. She also starts giving Zolf orders that end up making Wilde’s life more difficult without actively sabotaging the project; Zolf is alright with this, and is actually kind of delighted by it, since he’s sure it’s good for both of them. Cel continues to take shifts sitting against the door with Barnes, having nice conversations. During one of the convos, Barnes talks to Cel about how there was a nice man who Barnes thought he would be settling down with at his ideal home, but that the man was lost at sea. Cel says that they understand how it feels to lose people, and pats Barnes on the shoulder. Meanwhile, Azu continues to stick near Hamid.

Time skips forward to the bar being completed; Wilde summons everyone for a ribbon-cutting ceremony for the bar, requesting fancy and/or silly dress. Earhart comes out of her bunk, with a modified set of captain’s regalia, complete with a fully stuffed flamingo. Hamid borrows the magic sleeves back from Siggif (who is in Hamid’s body) and consults with Azu to see what she would like him to wear. Azu has mixed feelings - she’s excited to see herself in a dress, but she isn’t going to be the one wearing it. He ends up putting on a pink and purple ballgown in the style of what Billy Porter wore (suit on top, ballgown on bottom).

Wilde comes dressed as the ship. Zolf asks Barnes for his old naval dress uniform, and makes no modifications so that it’s massively oversized on him. Cel comes as a penguin, and arranges with Barnes to keep an eye on Carter in shifts (Carter seems much more chill than usual, however). Azu goes and chats with Meerk to see what they would like, since Azu is in their body. She pulls out a set of horns and asks to put them on; Meerk’s English isn’t great, but they’re clearly very excited about it, and then continues giving Azu a makeover, adding massive spikes to her outfit (which is helping Azu feel less vulnerable). Many of the kobolds are big fans of this.

Wilde stands in front of a ribbon with a knife and offers Earhart a chance to speak; she steps forward, takes a deep breath, and then declines (in a joking manner), before stepping back, prompting Zolf to give her a thumbs up. Wilde seems a bit thrown, and Earhart smirks; he gives a little speech and cuts the ribbon before hustling behind the bar. He pulls on an incredibly shiny and glittery bar apron and then asks people what they want to drink. Time skips forward a bit as everyone is starting to enjoy themselves. The band that Hamid fashioned (consisting of Friedrich, Meerk, and Natun) is happily playing away. The counterweighted bottles are working perfectly, and everyone has a drink in their hand. Wilde seems born to be a bartender. Siggif, Kiko, and some others have a card game going in the corner, and everyone is having a nice, chill time.

Azu goes over to Kiko, then; Kiko looks awkward, mostly because she isn’t sure what to do with Friedrich’s very long arms. She seems a bit more vulnerable than she has while Azu has been getting to know her. Azu asks Kiko to come over and chat with her, and they step off to a corner for some privacy. They both are standing a little awkwardly, and then Azu apologises to Kiko for not checking in on her after the whole body swap thing. Kiko apologises back, saying that she should have checked in as well, and Azu says that everything is really weird. Kiko says that she’s worried she’s going to hurt someone, being unused to Friedrich’s arms, and clearly is worried she’s going to hurt someone. She says that she didn’t mean anything by staying away, and Azu agrees, saying that she’s been thinking a lot about Kiko but that it would be very weird to do anything, considering they aren’t in their own bodies. She reaches up and puts her hand on Kiko’s, and they hold hands. Azu says that she’s very used to being big, and that Kiko will get used to it, especially because Kiko isn’t the kind of person who hurts people anyway. Kiko sits down at this, seeming comforted, and tells Azu that she likes her horns. Azu confesses that she likes being spiky, as it makes her feel better, and Kiko says that she wants to roll Azu at Carter. Azu is incredibly excited by this idea, and the scene pans out on this.

Hamid grabs Zolf and Cel, then, to have a quick chat about how to deal with bodyswapping back. He mentions that everyone seems to at least be settled, with the exception of Sassraa, but that they need to figure out how to reverse it. He reminds Cel that they’d discussed some magical effects that it could be due to, and that they have methods to reverse it, but with it affecting so many people on such a large scale, they might not have the means to undo it on their own. Zolf says that he wants to find the nearest borealis and just fly right through it, but adds that since he hasn’t been affected by this, he doesn’t want to participate in the decision. Hamid agrees with him on that, saying that using the wild magic is probably their best option. He talks to Cel about the design of the cage, and how it channels things, and wonders if there’s a way to reverse the polarity of the flow. [Meta note: this starts to bounce between Doctor Who jokes, Back to the Future jokes, and actual plot at this point.] Cel starts speaking about how they can reverse the trons, and get new trons, and that it might just work. The idea makes sense to them, and Hamid knows that it’s a one in a million chance, but it just might work. He adds that at the very least, it will increase their chances, and Zolf mentions that Cel said something about going a particular speed. Cel answers that they’ll need to be going about 88 knots per hour, which Hamid mentions is going pretty fast; Zolf says that there might be some lightning trailing out behind them.

Zolf again offers to stay outside and steer the ship, and will let Hamid and Cel handle all the stuff in the antimagic cell below. Cel agrees with this plan, and then sounds flustered about Zolf trusting the cage that they built. Zolf cuts them off, telling them that Cel did an incredible job with what they had, and Hamid agrees, thanking them. Cel thanks them both, seemingly unsure of how to take the compliment, but that they really want to focus on fixing it. They say that Hamid’s idea is good, but seem to be forcing some optimism as they repeat that everyone will be okay. Hamid says that this is mostly just a theory, but that they can present it to the group at large when they figure out all the little details.

At this point, Wilde steps over, with everyone’s favorite drinks in hand: ale for Zolf, a complicated drink for Cel, and a pina colada for Hamid. He sets the tray down and sits down, putting his feet up; everyone thanks him for throwing a great party. Cel offers to start working on putting this plan together, but Hamid and Zolf tell them that it can wait until the morning, and that they should enjoy themselves. Cel looks baffled, since creating new trons would be incredibly enjoyable, and Zolf goes to slow down the ship a bit to give them some more time to work through this.

## Dice rolls & mechanics

* Azu rolls Sense Motive on Wilde: 16
* Cel makes a Diplomacy check with Barnes: 19
* Hamid, Zolf, and Cel make a Knowledge (arcana) check: Hamid gets a nat 20, Zolf gets a 10, Cel gets 23