Don’t Have a Cow LeAnn/Transcript

**Don’t Have a Cow LeAnn Transcripts** for Don’t Have a Cow LeAnn

## Script

*(The episode begins with the Golden Sun Library, where LeAnn is working with her little sister Megan during Halloween.)*

***LeAnn:**Megan, today is one spooky day!*

***Megan:**I know! It's a-moo-zing, isn't it?*

*(Carl and Sarah walk in dressed as Dark Magician and Dark Magician Girl respectively.)*

***Sarah:**Carl, our costumes are so lit!*

***Carl:**It was my idea to be Yu-Gi-Oh! characters. So, you go get your craft book and I'll get Moste Potente Potions.*

*(The two split ways.)*

***Megan:**Uh, LeAnn? I guess we forgot something...*

***LeAnn:**Yeah, I know. But I think we can brew up a Wishing Potion so we can get cool outfits!*

*(Back at the mansion, LeAnn has started a Wishing Potion, while she and Megan are wearing their witch robes and hats. LeAnn also has her "I Love Cows" button on her robe.)*

***LeAnn:** Okay, so we need  a teaspoon of dryed cornmeal, two Flobberworms....*

***Megan:** Okay...*

***LeAnn:** ....Honeycomb, lizards'  spleens and sopophorous beans.*

***Megan:**Next you say the rhyme.*

***LeAnn:**Potion, potion in the pot*

*Give me the power to wish for a lot!*

(As LeAnn is working on the research her I Love Cows bottom fell into the cauldron and starting to beginning the transformation)

***LeAnn**(after showering): (screams) I have cow ears? Oh my Gods, I have COW EARS!!!*

***Megan:**What the... (Looks horrified at her sister)*

***Kyle:**HA HA!! (He sounds just like Nelson Muntz from The Simpsons.)*

***LeAnn:*** It’s not funny Kyle!

***Megan:**Yeah, you didn't have to be so mean!*

***Kyle:**I said "Ha, ha..."*

***LeAnn:** You're a werewolf, not a Simpsons  character!*

***Megan:**What you did was as bad as what you did to Carl's half-giant friend Josh, spraying  "Kick Me Hard: Wide Load" on his butt!*

***Kyle:**(kisses his hand) G'night, everybody!*

***Megan:**Just because he's half-giant doesn't mean you call him fat! Now let's look at LeAnn.*

***LeAnn:*** (As LeAnn is sitting down on the couch Megan is noticing LeAnn has a cow tail) Megan, don’t tell me that have a tail...

***Megan: ''***Yes, you do...

***LeAnn:**Oh, Gods, no! I can't go to the Halloween party like this! Zelda and Hilda will probably know!*

*(LeAnn remember about working on the potions and she now realize about I Love Cows pin fell into a cauldron)*

***LeAnn:** I wish I was a cow I should’ve realized this*

***Kyle:** I wouldn’t say you look like a cow LeAnn, but you’re going to be as fat as a cow*

***LeAnn:** I have to goooooo noooooow! (LeAnn realize she moo like a cow) I just moo oh noooooooooo*

***Megan:**Let's ask Grunkle Ken if there's an antidote.*

***LeAnn:** I have to find the antidote before I turned into a complete farm animal*

***Grunkle Ken:** Hate to say it, LeAnn, but according to Moste Potente Potions, there is no antidote...It'll wear off after three days, though.*

***LeAnn:** Oh well, I'll just go to a Halloween party as a cow person. After all, it IS Halloween .*

***Megan:** Are you sure LeAnn?*

***Kyle:** Yeah, you will be the beef anyway...Ha ha!!*

***LeAnn:** Yes I’m sure.*

*(As LeAnn is entering the party she looks at the mirror in horror)*

***LeAnn:** My nose became a cow snout! Help me!*

***Zelda:** LeAnn, welcome! Are you supposed to be a cow?*

***LeAnn:** I guess so...*

***Hilda:** Then come in! Have fun!*

(Commercial break)

***(**After commercial break, LeAnn is trying to have fun, but ends up eating all the corn in the dish and drinking tons of water cups.)*

***LeAnn:** These are goooooooooooooood...*

***Carl:** Hi LeAnn! Wow, you are a cow! Cool costume!*

***LeAnn:** I hope sooooooooooo. You won the contest.*

***Carl:** Not yet, I haven't. (Stares at LeAnn) LeAnn, are you turning into a cow?*

***LeAnn:**Yep, I am. And I ate a straw hat.*

***Carl:**What??? Why?*

***LeAnn:** Because I made a mistake with the potions and I end up it.(LeAnn saw a strew hat and tries to eat it but now realize she eating hay)*

***Carl:** Wow LeAnn, your eating habits has gotten to you*

***LeAnn:** Here's my research for my cow transformation: I am not a cow I am a human being, but all I did is eat strew hat that is hay.*

***Carl:** LeAnn, you know your feet are turning into hooves, right?*

***LeAnn:** I have hooves because my feet’s become hooves right?*

***Carl:** Yes, but don’t worry, you are a beautiful cow to me. And not to say I love you as a girlfriend, Eveline IS here and she'll think I'm cheating on her with an older woman...*

***LeAnn:** Thank you Carl and I...well, have to get used being a livestock anyway for three days. Is your sister at the party?*

***Carl:** She is. It's just that she's talking to her friends.*

***LeAnn:** Have a nice night on Halloween...*

***Carl:** You too. (Carl leaves.)*

*(As the party goes on, LeAnn doesn’t notice that she is chewing cud and feeling thirsty. It just so happens Sabrina Spellman, dressed as Xabrina the Warrior Witch, is near her.)*

***LeAnn:** Am I chewing cud? Gross!! I need something to wash down the hat and cud.(When she gets another drink she wants more)*

***Sabrina:** Are you alright LeAnn?*

***LeAnn:** I thought I was full, except I don’t feel full at all.*

***Sabrina:** Um, LeAnn, you might want to look at yourself in the mirror...*

*(LeAnn listen to Sabrina’s advice and looks in horror in the mirror)*

***LeAnn:** I got four stomachs nooooooooooow!! And I have cow horns, oh Gods!!!*

***Sabrina:**It sure looks like it!*

***LeAnn:** I really am a cow and I have horns*

***Sabrina:**No, you're a human. It's just that you're turning INTO a cow, because you make a Cow Potion instead of a Wishing Potion. I think you mixed the potions up...*

***LeAnn:** Wait do I feel something inside me? (LeAnn see what on her belly) Oh nooooooooooooo! I got udders I need to milked noooooooooow!! (out of nowhere and without thinking LeAnn let’s a loudest moo) Did I just moo without thinking? Oh my Gods!!(LeAnn now something about her hands) Now my hands became hooves Oh Gods no. Is my body growing? It’s making me look fat!*

*(Sabrina is really worried about LeAnn becoming a bovine and stay with her)*

***Sabrina:** It’s okay LeAnn is not all bad.*

***LeAnn:**How am I gonna survive this party if I'm polymorphing right before everyone's eyes? Help me, Gods, please!!*

***Zelda:**Attention, everyone!! It's time to meet our half-Muggle guest of honor, the Princess of Halloween, she's got a superstar cat who knows where it's at, and she'll bewitched ya...Sabrina Spellman!!*

***Sabrina:**Thank you, other Zelda. Now, the election of the Best Costume Contest will be underway, so please write down who you think will win!*

***Carl:**I'll put down LeAnn. Her costume is so real, little sis!*

***Sarah:**Coolamundo!*

*(Everywitch and everywizard casts their votes. Both Zeldas and both Hildas seen to enjoy LeAnn's cow form.)*

***Hilda:** Hey Zelda, LeAnn looks cute as a cow!*

***Zelda:** Are you in the cow costume, LeAnn?*

***Hilda:**Yes, she sure is!*

***LeAnn:** Hilda, it's trooooooooo! I AM TURNING INTO A COW!!!!*

***Z.S.:**How about a Halloween cake?*

*(Pulls out the cake, which reads "I KNOW WHAT YOU DID, MILKBRAIN!" )*

***LeAnn:**(gasps) Now I have udders and hooooooooves! And horns toooooooo!*

*(Commercial break)*

*(After commercial break, LeAnn's transformation is complete. She is now being milked by Hilda Spellman.)*

***H.S.:**Mmm-mmm! Uncle Quig is gonna want this!*

***Hilda:**Well, LeAnn, you won.*

***LeAnn:**I just have to learn to be a cow...and I think I enjoy it. Might as well milk it anyway...*

*(Suddenly, the wormhole backs out to Megan's eyes. She wakes up as if from a nightmare.)*

***Megan:**(screams) Oh, what a horrible dream!! (Looks in the cauldron and sees no cow Potion.) Phew, no more wrong potion! LeAnn, where are you?*

***LeAnn:**(off-screen) I'm eating grass, Megan.*

*(Megan looks outside to see LeAnn really IS a cow! She screams again, causing a zoom-out from SARAH'S mouth, because she woke up from a nightmare.)*

***Sarah:**(looks around the room and clutches her emerald green nightie) Thank the gods it was all just a nightmare.*

*(Zelda and Hilda open Sarah's door in their bathrobes.)*

***Zelda:**Are you okay? Did you have a bad dream?*

***Sarah:**Yeah, it all started with...*

*(The explanation goes on until the end of it.)*

*...and now I'm afraid of turning into a cow!*

***Zelda:**Well, you should know LeAnn likes cows and turning into one.*

***Hilda:**I'm going to sleep with you tonight, if it's alright with your Aunt Zelda; she is the oldest sister and the one in charge of the house, after all...*

***Zelda:**It's alright with me, Hildegard.*

*(Scene cuts to Sarah about to go to sleep, comforted by her aunt Hilda's soft bob and warm bathrobe.)*

***Sarah:**Goodnight, Hilda. (She lies down and goes to sleep, ending the episode.)*

*(Credits roll)*