The Princess Diaries, Vol. VII: Party Princess

**The Princess Diaries, Vol. VII: Party Princess** is the seventh volume of the Princess Diaries series by Meg Cabot.

It was released in 2006.

## Book Description

Princesses just want to have fun.

This spring, Mia's determined to have a good time, despite the fact that the student government over which she presides is suddenly broke. Fortunately (or unfortunately, depending on how you look at it) Grandmère has an elaborate scheme to simultaneously raise money, catapult Mia to theatrical fame, and link her romantically with an eligible teen bachelor not her boyfriend. It's no wonder that Michael, the love of her life, seems to think she's a psycho, or worse: not much fun.

Is it possible that Mia, soon-to-be star of the stage, president of the student body and future ruler of Genovia, doesn't know how to party?

## Opening Quote

*"The spirit and will of any child would have been entirely humbled and broken by the changes she has had to submit to. But, upon my word, she seems as little subdued as if- as if she were a princess."*

A Little Princess*, Francis Hodgson Burnett*

## Timeline

Begins on Tuesday, March 2, 2005 and concludes on Wednesday, March 10, 2005 during Mia's sophomore year.

## Plot Summary

Mia leads an AEHS student council meeting where Ling Su reveals that they do not have enough money to rent Alice Tulley Hall for graduation. They spent all their money advanced recycling bins for paper, cans, and bottles with a built in crusher. Mia is afraid that the senior class valedictorian Amber Cheeseman will beat her up if graduation has to be held in the gym. In addition to this, the stickers for the recycling bins say "Paper, Cans, & Battles." Mrs. Hill suggests they go door-to-door selling candles to raise back the money.

Developers in Dubai have created a cluster of islands called The World with each country being represented by a single island. Grandmère wants to bid on Genovia but is being bid against by someone named John Paul Reynolds-Abernathy the Third, who has a son that attends AEHS. To win over the creators of The World, Grandmère is planning a benefit for Genovian Olive Farmers, called Aide de Ferme.

Mia submitted a story to *Sixteen* magazine called No More Corn! for a contest. Mia arrives home and Helen has her letter from *Sixteen,* which is an unpersonalized rejection letter. Lilly IMs Mia to tell her that she got 5 of the same letter (one for each of the R-rated stories she submitted). Lilly suggests they start a literary magazine to publish their stories and raise the money they need for graduation. Michael IMs Mia and also suggests the student council sell candles to earn the money they need. He invites Mia to a party he is throwing at his parents' house that Saturday night, which concerns Mia, though she does not tell him this and agrees to come. Mia asks Lilly about the party and she cryptically says that the Drs. Moscovitz have bigger things to worry about than Michael's party.

All of Mia's friend group has heard about the student council being broke and is in favor of selling candles. Perin notices The Guy Who Hates It When They Put Corn In The Chili and wants to invite him to sit with them, but Boris rebuffs this idea, saying he doesn't want to sit with a weirdo (which Lilly points out is hypocritical). Lilly moves forward with her idea for a literary magazine, which she calls Fat Louie's Pink Butthole, and asks Ms. Martinez to oversee it. Grandmère tells Mia she has an idea to help her out of her financial problem and tells her how when she was young her school put on a show to raise money and suggests Mia do the same.

Michael, Lilly, Tina, Boris, Kenny, Shameeka, and Ling Su IM Mia to ask if they can come to Aide de Ferme as they each want to meet a celebrity that will be attending. At school Grandmère has posters everywhere for auditions for *Braid!* Lana cryptically tells Mia that she "knows" and wants to meet with her after class. Lana tells Mia that she knows the student council is broke, after calculating the cost of the Paper, Cans, & Battles bins. She tells Mia that she will keep quiet as long as she can get two tickets to Aide de Ferme for her and Trisha Hayes. Mia agrees and asks Lana how to party. Lana calls Mia a dork, but tells her that all you have to do is look sexy, grab a beer, dance if the music is good, and hook up if there are hot guys.

Lilly, Tina, Boris, Ling Su, Perin, Kenny, Amber Cheeseman, and The Guy Who Hates It When They Put Corn In The Chili all show up for *Braid!* auditions. Grandmère has found the directer that discovered her, Señor Eduardo Fuentes, to direct her show, even though he is nearly 100 years old and constantly drifts off to sleep. *Braid!* tells the story of Rosagunde (and her handsome lover Gustav) and her murder of Alboin in 568. The performance will be the following week, and while this initially dismays the AEHS participants, she assures them that she has already discussed it with Principal Gupta and they will each receive 100 extra credit points in English. Mia does not want to audition, but Grandmère forces her to and pairs her with The Guy Who Hates It When They Put Corn In The Chili - who is revealed to be J.P. Reynolds-Abernathy the Fourth, the son of the man who is bidding against Grandmère for island of Genovia. Lilly and Tina note that J.P. is actually quite attractive.

Though everyone is convinced that Lilly will be cast as Rosagunde, Mia is cast as Rosagunde with J.P. as Gustav. Lilly cries in the bathroom upon seeing the cast list, but she pretends to be happy, as she will have more time to work on Fat Louie's Pink Butthole. Mia invites J.P. to sit with them at lunch (to Boris's chagrin) and he is actually quite funny and also keeps a notebook that he is always writing in, although his is for creative writing, not a journal like Mia's. Mia tries to convince Grandmère to give Lilly the part of Rosagunde, but Grandmère blackmails Mia into keeping the part by threatening to tell Amber Cheeseman about the money issue. At rehearsals J.P. bonds with the group and when they all become dismayed with the hours that will be required to put on the show in less than a week J.P. encourages them. Mia goes to the Moscovitzs' that night to watch a dystopian movie marathon with Michael for one of his classes and to make dip for the party the next day.

On Saturday Grandmère has the cast working with a choreographer and a vocal coach. Lilly invites everyone to Michael's party that night. Mia takes Lana's advice and cuts one of her skirts short, wearing her all black ensemble with a beret and red lipstick (both borrowed from her mom). Michael is surprised by Mia's new look, as is everyone else. Mia grabs a beer, which shocks Lilly and Michael, but she brushes them off and gets up to dance. No one dances with her and she spends time dancing alone for a bit, feeling embarrassed, before J.P. joins her. She shimmies up to him when suddenly the Drs. Moscovitz return. Michael follows them into their room and Mia sits on the couch, embarrassed. After Lilly asks her if dancing was supposed to be a sexy dance Mia grabs Lars and leaves, as she is about to cry. She sends bagels and spreads to the Moscovitzs' in the morning.

Lilly continues to make fun of Mia's dance the next day at rehearsals. Mia texts Michael 3 times to try an apologize but all he sends back is "WE NEED 2 TALK." J.P. asks Mia if she is mad at him for dancing with her at the party, as she seems upset, but Mia tells him she's not. She asks him what his issue is with corn and he explains that he is a large fan of David Mamet, but has never met him. His parents met him once and they told him a story about when J.P. was a baby and they first fed him corn - and it came out whole in the diaper. He was mortified at discovering this information and has not been able to eat corn ever since. After hearing this Mia begs Lilly not to put No More Corn! in the literary magazine, but Lilly refuses.

Before school on Monday, Mia sends Michael a 12inch cookie that says I'M SORRY. Lana asks Mia about her tickets for Aide de Ferme. Mia, stressed with everything else, tells her not to get her panties in a wad and that her and Trisha's names are already on the list, they just have to show up and they will get in. At rehearsal Grandmère reveals that *Braid!* will be performed at Aide de Ferme, which upsets the cast as they don't want to embarrass themselves in front of their favorite celebrities, which Grandmère finds unappreciative.

After rehearsals Mia has Hans take her to Michael's dorm room. Michael is surprised she is there and when she sees him he looks sad (and she assumes he is going to break up with her). Mia apologizes for her behavior at the party but tells Michael that she was really intimidated by the idea of going to a college party and he shouldn't have given her the silent treatment for the last two days. Michael tells her she shouldn't have been intimidated and that she did act immature, but he hasn't been giving her the silent treatment - he's been dealing with the fact that his parents are separating. The Drs. Moscovitz told him when they came home in the middle of the party and Michael was going to tell Mia, but when he came out of their room she was gone. Mia asks if they've already told Lilly and Michael tells her they are waiting until after the musical and the literary magazine are done, but Mia thinks she might already know. Mia apologizes for everything, but she thought Michael was mad at her because he wanted a Party Girl. Michael says he doesn't want a party girl, he just wants - but gets cut off by Doo Pak's return to their room. Michael's mother calls and Mia sadly leaves while he is on the phone. In the car on the way home she writes Michael a long e-mail on Lars' Sidekick.

Lilly refuses to pull No More Corn! from the literary magazine. Mia, Tina, and Lilly pass notes and Tina thinks J.P. has a crush on Mia. Lilly asks why she would think that and not that J.P. has a crush on her, which makes both Tina and Mia think that Lilly has a crush on J.P. herself, though Lilly denies this. Grandmère has had a stage constructed at the Plaza for *Braid!* and conducts a dress rehearsal. She tells Mia and J.P. she would like to add a kiss to the final scene, as the audience will expect the leads to share a kiss. Mia is horrified, but Grandmère blackmails her. Outside, J.P. tells Mia that they don't have to kiss during the performance if she doesn't want to, and Mia thanks him and kisses him on the cheek, which upsets Lilly.

The morning of Aide de Ferme Lilly IMs Mia and tells her that it was presumptuous to kiss J.P., as he might get the wrong idea, but Mia tells her again that she and J.P. are just friends. They argue and Lilly signs off, angrily. She does not ride to school with Mia in the limo. Mia, desperate to keep J.P. from seeing No More Corn! and be embarrassed in front of the whole school breaks into Lilly's locker and steals all the copies of Fat Louie's Pink Butthole and with Lars and takes them to the men's restroom to hide them - where J.P. is inside. She confesses that she wrote a story about him, before she knew him, and is trying to destroy it to keep from embarrassing him in front of the school. J.P. suggests putting them in the crusher of the recycling bins, but at the last second Mia cannot bring herself to destroy something Lilly has worked so hard on when she has a lot going on at home. J.P. tells her he isn't worried about other people thinking anything of him because he is a loner and helps Mia return the magazines to Lilly's locker.

Lilly sells her copies of Fat Louie's Pink Butthole at lunch, but Principal Gupta comes in with Mr. Wheeton and confiscates all the copies, taking Lilly back to her office. It turns out that Ms. Martinez never reviewed any parts of the magazine and Lilly included her X-rated story submissions for *Sixteen* in it as well as having a questionable title and cover art. Principal Gupta changes the name of the literary magazine to The Zine and makes sure Ms. Martinez will review all the content in the future, in addition to calling Lilly's parents. Tina suggests to Mia that Lilly possibly kept No More Corn! in the magazine because she wanted Mia to look bad to J.P., which Mia has a hard time believing. Tina points out that Lilly lost the student council presidency and the part of Rosagunde to Mia and might not have wanted to lose a boy she likes to her as well.

Everyone gets to Aide de Ferme to perform *Braid!* but Mia is still nervous about the kiss with J.P. (and even more nervous that she might like it). The show goes off without any problems and the audience seems to really enjoy it. As Mia hears her cue for her to enter the stage for the final kiss between Rosagunde and Gustav she is surprised to find Michael in J.P.'s place in costume as Gustav. They rush out and kiss, and the audience applauds, not noticing the difference in actors. Mia finds out that Lilly, Michael, and J.P. conspired together to swap them at the end so that Mia wouldn't have to kiss someone who is not Michael. Mia asks Michael to forgive her for the sexy dance and Michael does, on the condition that she forgive him for being so absent, which she does.

John Paul Reynolds-Abernathy the Third thanks Mia for bringing J.P. out of his shell and tells Grandmère that he is withdrawing his bid on Genovia (as it turns out he wanted Monaco instead, to Grandmère's chagrin). Grandmère gives Mia her check - for the exact amount needed to rent Alice Tulley Hall for graduation and Amber Cheeseman tells Mia that she's not at all what she would have guessed from the tabloids - she's really a party girl. Lilly approaches Mia and tells her about all the celebrities she's been talking too, including David Mamet. Mia tells Lilly to grab J.P. and take him to meet David Mamet and that she won't regret it, which Lilly does. Michael finishes talking to Bob Dylan and comes over to ask Mia how she is doing and Mia truthfully answers that she is good.