Clod

Hailing from a far-off land known only to mere mortals as "the old country", the lumbering rock behemoth known as **Clod** decimates his foes with extreme prejudice. He is by far the largest and possibly most dangerous being on the Minion team, what with his fiery temper and giant fists of punching. Clod possesses a mind-boggling 250 health and a devastating primary weapon: the Coalgun, known to him as "Anastasia". The Coalgun can deal massive damage over a short period of time, due to its lack of dependence on ammunition. Rather than use ammo, the Coalgun will overheat if fired for too long of a time, forcing Clod to let it cool down.

Clod's main weakness is his pitiful speed; he is by far the slowest class in the game and his speed drops down even more when firing his weapon. Because of this, he is often reliant on friendly Snerlins and Krackles for healing and support. In return, Clod is able to summon spikes of rock from the ground that he and his teammates can use as cover.

## Biography

### Backstory

*"2 score and...some years ago, Clod was born in an active volcano in an unnamed land he only refers to as 'the old country'. Not a whole lot is known about his past, so we'll just make something up: he was raised by mountain goats made of chocolate in a magical fairytale castle known as 'Zippy Town'. Raised to be a lawyer, Clod decided it was more fun to physically ruin puny people than to financially ruin them. Of course, we're making this up, so none of it is true."*

### Stats

* **Height:** 7'9"
* **Weight:** 987lbs
* **Likes:** Crushing puny Shockbots, His Coalgun
* **Dislikes:** Puny Shockbots, Puny Shockbots that are still alive
* **Relationships:** His enemies (it's a complicated relationship)
* **Fears:** NONE WHATSOEVER
* **Skills:** Crushing puny Shockbots, Dragon-wrestling

## Relevant Statisitcs

 Speed
 Damage

## Basic Strategy

*Main article:Clod Tips*

* Team up with friendly Snerlins to storm Shockbot territories.
* Allow your Coalgun to cool down after a few seconds of firing to avoid overheating.
* Spawn Spike Walls to provide yourself (and your teammates) with essential cover.

## Attacks and Abilities

### Primary Abilities

 Flaming Tackle | Reduced range and impact damage, but leaves opponents in flames

### Secondary Abilities

 Eruption Spike | Summons a bed of spikes that damages enemies within melee range

## Character Upgrades

### Burning Ammo

Clod's Coalgun ammunition sets opponents on fire.

### Titan Strength

Decreases the amount of time it takes to perform Debris Toss

## Cosmetic Accessories

*Main article: List of Clod Accessories*

Clod's four customizable slots are:

* **Headpiece** - The hat on Clod's head
* **Vein Shape** - The shape of Clod's lava veins
* **Vein Color** - The color of Clod's lava veins
* **Exhaust** - The exhaust pipe on Clod's primary weapon

## Taunts

1. Daddy's Girl---(Clod gently "rocks" his gun Anastasia to sleep)
2. Belly Laugh---(Clod begins laughing hysterically while holding his side)
3. Skullcrusher---(Clod begins pretending to crush his opponents heads with his fingers)
4. Buttkicker---(Clod begins doing the Russian squat dance)
5. Me Beat Chest---(Clod begins his chest while letting out a battle cry)
6. Dead Meat---(Clod pulls his finger across his throat as a threat)
7. Party Favor---(Clod blows up a party balloon and admires his work before crushing it in one hand)
8. Lunch Break---(Clod pulls out a handful of gravel and eats the handful in one bite)
9. Rockin' Solo---(Clod performs a guitar solo using Anastasia as a guitar)
10. Sumo Stomp---(Clod performs two sumo stomps before letting out a battle cry)

## Achievements

*Main article: Clod Achievements*

* **Number of Achievements:** ??

## Quotes

* **When Spawning/Respawning:**
	+ *"Here I come, weaklings!"*
	+ *"Back in old country, Coalgun fires you!"*
	+ *"Say hello to my friend, Anastasia!"*
	+ *"I am brick wall!'*
	+ *"I dare you to fight back!"*
	+ *"Clod is coming for you!"*
	+ *"I am back from the ground, puny babies!"*
* **When Low on Health:**
	+ *"Come heal me, Magic Man!"*
	+ *"Why does Magic Man not heal Clod?"*
	+ *"Why has Magic Man forsaken Clod?"*
	+ *"Go, Clod, go!"*
	+ *"I will punish puny wizard if he does not come..."*
	+ *"Shhh...shhh, Anastasia. Do not fret..."*
	+ *"When I am healed, I will crush you into bolts!"*
* **When Scoring a Kill:**
	+ *"Dasvidaniya, infant!"*
	+ *"I was born in crater, not yesterday!"*
	+ *"Run from me, cowardly kitties!"*
	+ *"You make me waste ammo on you!"*
	+ *"You make Anastasia angry!"*
	+ *"It does not pay to be made of metal!"*
	+ *"Your entire team died ages ago!"*
* **When Charging:**
	+ *"Incoming!"*
	+ *"Here I come!"*
	+ *"You are out of here!"*
	+ *"And don't come back!"*
	+ *"You can not kill rock!"*
	+ *"I do not need Coalgun to kill you!"*
	+ *"Boom! Done! You are exploded!"*
* *​***When Planting a Bomb in *Boom Run*:**
	+ *"And boom!"*
	+ *"Clod is doing all of work here, team!"*
	+ *"Your base is doomed!"*
	+ *"Bombs away!"*
	+ *"Clod will destroy tiny base."*
	+ *"Thank you, tiny walking bomb."*
* **After Dominating a Footbot:**
	+ **​***"I will squish you tiny soldier man!"*
	+ *"You have trained for nothing!"*
	+ *"Rocket jump will only take you so far from Clod!"*
* **After Dominating a Mac:**
	+ **​***"Clod's fist will destroy tiny box man!"*
	+ *"I will bring you infinite misery, tiny kitty cat."*
	+ *"Rock crushes steel, little thingy."*
* **After Dominating a Zoom:**
	+ **​***"Your name will now be 'doom'!"*
	+ *"Your death makes Clod's shoulders bounce!"*
	+ *"Doom doom DOOM!"*
* **After Dominating a Sarge:**
	+ **​***"Fancy little helmet only covers your head!"*
	+ *"Clod will crush Catfish like a bug!"*
	+ *"Clod eat your missile for breakfast!*
* **After Dominating a Doc:**
	+ **​***"Tiny doctor will need tiny grave! Aha!"*
	+ *"Stop hiding, tiny medical officer!"*
	+ *"Laughter IS the best medicine! Now you are dead!"*
* **After Dominating a Pappy:**
	+ **​***"I will destroy you pitiful redneck!"*
	+ *"Get along, tiny doggy. Get along!"*
	+ *"You can not hide, Billy Bob!"*
* **After Dominating a Mole:**
	+ **​***"Hide back in dirt clod from Clod!"*
	+ *""*
	+ *""*
* **After Dominating a Mr. Stinky:**
	+ **​***"Clod has no lungs! You are weak!"*
	+ *""*
	+ *""*
* **After Dominating a Gertron:**
	+ **​***"Stone beats bomb! Next!"*
	+ *"Now hide in shame, tiny huge lady!"*
	+ *"Kaboom! Kaboom! Ha ha ha!"*
* **While Bomb Minebot is Moving:**
	+ *"Puny teammates, stop that bomb!"*
	+ *"Tiny robot men are pushing bomb this way!"*
	+ *"Are you deaf? Stop that mine cart!"*

## Trivia

* Clod's Shockbot counterpart is Sarge.
* Clod speaks in a very thick Russian accent.
* Clod often refers to Snerlin as the "magic man".
* Clod is the only class whose in-game backstory is entirely made up.