Wizard 22

**Chapter 22**

Zedd wakes up and makes pointless small talk with Adie. We learn that it's been seven days since Richard left Zedd in Adie's house. Zedd eats. Isn't it funny when the skinny guy eats a lot?

It isn't? Since when?

Oh, the 1920s; got it.

Zedd is alarmed when he learns that Adie gave Richard the Phial of Earendil – I mean, the night stone. Apparently it's dangerous. Adie tells Zedd that she warned Richard with a riddle, which is a blatant lie; checking back to Chapter 17, when Richard receives the night stone, Adie doesn't tell him anything that even vaguely resembles a riddle. \~/ It doesn't matter though, since Zedd says that Richard hates riddles and refuses to answer them; he considers them *“an insult to honesty.”* Sounds like sour grapes to me.

Adie angsts about this, so Zedd uses magic to determine that Richard has made it to the Midlands. Zedd decides not to follow Richard, but to handle things in the Westland; apparently he has some sort of plan. Adie gets coy and invites Zedd to stay the night.

It's implied that Zedd and Adie have sex. >\_< \~/\~/

Moving on! Quickly now!

Richard and Kahlan are wandering through somewhere with long grass, looking for the Mud People (that just sound so wrong...Mud People, mud races...ick). They come to some skull-topped poles, and we learn that the Mud People honor their ancestors by placing their skulls on poles. Also, one of the ways to become an honored ancestor is by killing lots of outsiders.

Richard refuses to promise not to hurt the Mud People. Lovely fellow. Kahlan apologizes for asking him to promise. We learn that the Mud People won't be coerced into help, so Richard will have to win them over.

Kahlan muses to herself about how she can't encourage Richard's feelings for her; apparently this has to do with being a Confessor.

Suddenly, the Mud People pop up out of the grass. *“The men were wearing animal skins over most of their bodies. Sticky mud that didn't wash away in the rain was smeared over the rest of their skin and faces, and their hair was smoothed down with it. Clumps of grass were tied to their arms and to the skins, and stuffed under headbands, making them invisible when they had been squatted down.”*

That's...that's just terrible. It's like in the Dilbert comics, where Elbonia is a land of mud populated by bearded guys in big furry hats because that's what we Americans think other countries are like. This sounds like a horribly stereotyped description of Ye Savage Natives of Darkest Africa. They're literally covered with mud? Even their hair and faces? >\_< \~/

Oh, and it's apparently magic mud *“that [won't] wash away in the rain.”* How exactly does that work? And how does it stay mud? Wouldn't it eventually dry out and become...dirt? It's not like they live in a swamp; the terrain sounds like rolling plains. That's another drink. \~/

Anyway, the leader of the Racist Stereotype People, Savidlin, greets Kahlan by smacking her in the face. This, it develops, is the Primitive Savage People's traditional greeting, and is meant to demonstrate their respect for the other person's strength. Richard gets a full punch, and responds by knocking Savidlin off his feet. This makes him instantly friends with the Wet Dirt People, who name him Richard With The Temper.

Kahlan says that she and Richard have come seeking the Generic Native Peoples' help against Darken Rahl. Richard wants to get going faster, but Kahlan insists they be all polite and crap like that. She calls Richard impatient, and we get this gem of a line:

*“I am very patient, but I am not very tolerant.”*

Richard: The Intolerant Hero.

\~/

Drinks: 6

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