Schneiderman

Cover of a movie featuring Schneider-Man

Schneider-Man is the web-slinging alter-ego of Eric-The Gamer.

Schneider-Man possesses the exact same abilities as popular-and-heroic Marvel-hero Peter-Parker, or Spider-Man. Unlike Spider-Man, however, Schneider-Man does not do anything heroic at all. He uses his web-abilities to go around the city of New-York splattering innocents in the face and exclaiming "Get skeeted on! Haha, get skeeted on!"

Schneider-Man currently has a warrant out for his arrest on the following charges:

* New York Penal Law Section 245.01 (Exposure of a person), 30 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 245.02 (Promoting the exposure of a person), 42 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 245.00 (Public lewdness), 80,230 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.05 (sex offenses; lack of consent), 51,427 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.10 (Sex offenses; limitation; defenses.), 400 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.16 (Sex offenses; corroboration.), 12,043 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.20 (Sexual misconduct.), 40 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.25 (Rape in the third degree.), 2 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.30 (Rape in the second degree.), 1 count
* New York Penal Law Section 130.35 (Rape in the first degree.), 1,022 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.40 (Criminal Sexual Act in the third degree.), 4,001 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.45 (Criminal Sexual Act in the second degree.), 4,200 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.50 (Criminal Sexual Act in the first degree.), 5,042 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.52 (Forcible touching.), 2 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.53 (Persistent sexual abuse.), 1,276 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.55 (Sexual abuse in the third degree.), 250 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.60 (Sexual abuse in the second degree.), 360 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.65 (Sexual abuse in the first degree.), 370 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.65a (Aggravated sexual abuse in the fourth degree.), 400 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.66 (Aggravated sexual abuse in the third degree.), 390 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.67 (Aggravated sexual abuse in the second degree.), 340 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.70 (Aggravated sexual abuse in the first degree.), 400 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.75 (Course of sexual conduct against a child in the first degree.), 15 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.80 (Course of sexual conduct against a child in the second degree.), 15 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.90 (Facilitating a sex offense with a controlled substance.), 3 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.91 (Sexually motivated felony.), 600 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.95 (Predatory sexual assault.), 124 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.96 (Predatory sexual assault against a child.), 4 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 145.05 (Criminal mischief in the second degree), 178 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 145.12 (Criminal mischief in the first degree), 784 counts
* New York Penal Law Section 130.85 (Female genital mutilation.), 1 count

The NYPD is offering a $25,000 reward for any information that can lead to the arrest and conviction of the Facial-Fiend.

## Notes

* If charged, Schneider-Man could see up to 5,067 years in federal prison.
* The League of Erics openly endorses the actions of Schneider-Man, and has funded the production of a Schneider Cinematic Universe (SCU), otherwise known as The Schneider-verse.
* Schneider-Man has appeared in at least four different feature-length films.