recursal/Fanatic-Fandom huggingface dataset:
Alexander Crick

EYES ONLY: Administration, Internal Observation and Wetwork Amalgam (IOWA)

NAME: Dr. Alexander Crick

CONVENTION: Progenitors

AMALGAM: The Roosevelt Group

BIO:

Dr. Crick grew up as a part of the Organic Humanoid In-vitro Objective (OHIO). He was one of the only survivors of the program, and has been set as a biological baseline for the standard level of Bio-Modification before unacceptable chances of internal rejection occur. The lifespan of these modifications is unknown. Students moving from OHIO to the Institute of Dynamic and Applied Health Outcomes (IDAHO) are intended to be Extraordinary Citizens, and Dr. Crick's subsequent awakening was a complete surprise. After numerous tests failed to discern the cause, and the failure of many replicative experiments, Dr. Crick was moved out of IDAHO to a standard Progenitor research academy in a construct in an undisclosed location in the American Midwest where he graduated near the top of his class after defending his thesis: Multiversal Biotechnology: The Advantages of Using Anthroponuclear Multiple Worlds Theory to Modify our Understanding of Bio-Matter Integration and Rejection.

Dr. Crick's Progenitor Aptitude Test (PAT) and childhood in OHIO placed him in the Gene-engineers Methodology, Applied Sciences division. As a part of this assignment Dr. Crick was assigned to a multi-disciplinary Amalgam including Dr. Quinn, and Agents Vestral, and Holbrook. They "completed" their initial "training" under the capable "supervision" of Maj. Stimpson. Following their training they were "assigned" to a listening post in rural North Carolina. It was here that Dr. Crick became primary physician and combat medic for his Amalgam, and their assigned extraordinary citizen, Mike. It was the amalgam's presence at this remote listening post that allowed them to foil a depressing Nephandus Plot, and attract the attention of a Syndicate VPO.

This Syndicate VPO took the newly minted Roosevelt Group under her wing, and funded their transfer and establishment in Washington D.C.'s Dupont Circle. Since there, Dr. Crick has helped E.C. Mike retake his health, pioneered the development of a new strain of Rapidly Organizing and Aggressively Cleaning Hybrid Exoskeletal Synthetics (ROACHES), and brought many wayward Progenitors back into Ethical Compliance.

https://drive.google.com/open?id=0B8q0e8mMY-m\_TzM0eHFvemEyQUE
Schoolhouse Wrong

"Schoolhouse Wrong" is basically what happens when "Schoolhouse Rock" meets "Avenue Q." It is staged offscreen, but the rehearsal process is seen in episode 1.13. It is directed by Leo Hartz and Maya Song, and contains such numbers as "I'm Just A Pill," an upbeat number featuring a cheery morning-after pill and her tap dancing female condom friend Condomleezza.
Syndicate Story

**A Syndicate Story**

John leaned forward to order his second beer while forcing
thoughts about the office from his mind. One hour to play. Four hours to sleep.

His manager reached over to put a hand on his shoulder; he
gestured toward a table of Wall Street guys. It was like a funhouse mirror:
same disheveled suits, same dark circles under their eyes, same pile of empty
glassware. “You know the difference between those guys and us, John?”

John tilted his head to indicate the lack of a smartass
reply.

“The difference is that we’re the ones who know there’s a
difference.”

John caught sight of himself in the mirror on that note and
waved at the bartender, “Shots!”

He raised the new glass, “Let’s drink for the Syndicate.”

His manager raised the shot to eye level, “We eat, sleep,
and fuck for the Syndicate – let’s drink for ‘em too.”

There was a minute of silence before John said it.
“Copperballs.”

“What?”

“Copperballs. Why do they call him Copperballs?”

“Stimson? You sure you want to know that?”

Silence. Shots. Silence.

“I heard he was on survival training somewhere in the
Carolinas. A copperhead got hold of his sack and it took him two days to get
back to civilization. So, by that time the wound was necrotic and a labcoat
with a sense of humor gave him new balls. Copper. Balls.”

John looked at his manager’s crooked, drunken smile. He
opened his mouth to say something then closed it before anything came out.
Again. Open. Closed. “Shots!”
Wonder Creation

Wonders:
Resources, Definitions, and Basic Rules

Relevant Mage book citations include a chart
detailing the necessary spheres on page 508 and a longer description of the
crafting process on pages 651-653. I’ve attached copies of both.

**Definitions:**

a.
**Wonders**
are items that employ Sphere-based Effects in order to channel the
reality-warping powers of a mage. Consors can use a mystic wonder.
Extraordinary Citizens can use a tech-based Device. A sleeper could use a
Trinket or Fetish.

b.
**Talisman**:
a sophisticated, self-contained magickal item, i.e. the Traditions word for
Wonder using a superstitionist paradigm.

c.
**Device**:
a tech-based Wonder. Loyal Technocrats only employ regulation devices.

d.
**Fetish**:
similar to a wonder but it gets its power from a bound spirit.

e.
**Artificial**
Intelligences and Alien Grafts**: Fetishes in the Technocratic paradigm.**

f.
**Trinket**:
a minor Wonder, e.g. basic mirrorshades.

g.
**Periapt**:
superstitionist word for a portable source of quintessence.

h.
**Matrix**:
a periapt in the Technocratic paradigm.

**Using a**
Wonder**: A Device has its own Enlightenment pool that is rolled for**
activation; any paradox goes to the Technocrat.

**Using a**
Fetish**: Devices fueled by aliens and AIs require a relationship with the**
inhabitant or compulsion. This may involve a contested willpower roll against
difficulty 7.

**Using a**
Matrix**: They hold up to 5 quintessence per dot. Drawing energy or refueling**
the matrix requires a Prime 2 roll.

**Using a**
Trinket**: They’re like Apple products—they just work.**

**Making a Wonder:**
Technocratic Devices

Check the chart on page 508 for necessary
spheres. Devices take Prime 4 + the spheres in the effect. An individual
character must have all the necessary spheres.

The technocrat must research the theories and
techniques involved in creating the device using the “Research” entry from the
Dramatic Feats chart on page 403. This is an extended Intelligence + Research
roll at difficulty 9.

The technocrat must make an extended ability
roll to create the actual Device. This process requires extended rolls as
explained on pages 463-464. It comes down to 2 options for extended rolls using
appropriate attributes and abilities; probably Intelligence + Technology or
Computer:

a.
Significant improvement on existing device:
Diff. 9, 10 successes required

b.
Brand new device based on new or unconventional
principles: Diff. 10, 20 successes

The technocrat will need the mundane materials
used in creating the device: anything from high-grade computer components to
nuclear material.

The Technocrat must fuel the creation of the
Wonder with Quintessence. It takes 5 points per background dot and an
additional 1 point for every crafting roll made in step 3 above.

The source of the quintessence must be
appropriate to the nature of the Wonder. This may require a special quest at
the storyteller’s discretion.
Septimus Pretorius

Doctor **Septimus Pretorius** was Henry Frankenstein's former teacher at Goldstadt Medical College. He was a tall, emaciated-looking man with an unusually large nose and devilish pointed ears. A professor of philosophy, it was Pretorius who first pointed young Henry on the path to his unwholesome experiments with giving life to the dead, and when the horrors of Frankenstein's Monster were traced from Henry back to Pretorius, Pretorius was fired.

Pretorius performed experiments similar to Henry's, creating life in the form of various miniature people in bottles, which he claimed to have grown from "seed." He sought his former student out after learning that the Frankenstein monster had survived the fiery inferno of the burning windmill, and proposed to Henry that together they create a mate for him, with Henry building the body and Pretorius supplying an artificially-grown brain. Henry initially balked at the idea, but Pretorius had an ace up his sleeve: He had encountered the Frankenstein monster within a crypt while he and his two assistants Karl and Rudy were robbing graves, and told his pupil's creation about his plan to make a mate for him.

The monster, eager for companionship of any kind, considered Pretorius his friend from then on was willing to do anything that the impish scientist desired, such as kidnapping Henry's wife Elizabeth in order to force him to help Pretorius. Henry agreed, and together the two scientists created the Bride of Frankenstein. Unfortunately, even the bride found her would-be husband ugly, and the heartbroken monster decided that they all belonged dead and destroyed the laboratory. Although Henry and Elizabeth escaped, Pretorius was killed when the tower exploded.
Mentioned in Dispatches

Following an old military practice, the Technocratic Union will occasionally include the names and accomplishments of individual agents or amalgams in propaganda broadcasts. To receive such an honor is referred to as being "mentioned in dispatches" or earning a "MiD citation." This is sometimes accompanied with a written notification of the award and is always a sign of increasing fame among Union citizens.

The Roosevelt Group received their first MiD citation after apprehending Agent Samuel Shaw.
Agent Jonathan Drake

Jonathan "Jonny" Drake is a NWO Gray Man with a Symposium-Level appointment in Washington, DC. His non-administrative duties are focused on nationwide anti-deviant intelligence operations and he is known for his flashy "Bond-like" style and sometimes wearing a black suit or gray suit with black details despite his rank.

After his first meeting with the Roosevelt Group, Agent Drake was given permission to interrogate an informant (now prisoner) with intelligence related to deviant construct locations. He embraced this task with great enthusiasm.
Anthropomorphic Extra-Dimensional Reality Deviant

Anthropomorphic Extra-Dimensional Reality Deviant or AEDRD refers to a broad class of deviants somewhat resembling humans in appearance and mannerisms, e.g. bipedal deviants with both human and animal features. Field agents sometimes refer to these entities as "AE dreads" or simply "dreads" because of the acronym.
Where Eagles Dare

***Where Eagles Dare*** is a novel by Alistair MacLean.

## Characters

* **Major John Smith** - A British Army major and undercover spy for MI6.
* **Wing Commander Cecil Carpenter** - Pilot of the Lancaster bomber that flies Smith's team into Bavaria.
* **Lieutenant Morris Schaffer** - An American Ranger lieutenant in the Office of Strategic Services (OSS).
* **Colonel Wyatt-Turner** - British Army colonel involved in MI6.
* **Vice-Admiral Rolland** - Assistant Director of Naval Operations and head of MI6.
* **Lieutenant General George Carnaby** - A top aide of Dwight D. Eisenhower and one of the chief coordinators of planning for the Second Front.
* **Edward Carraciola** - An MI6 division head and member of Smith's team.
* **Olaf Christiansen** - An MI6 division head and member of Smith's team.
* **Lee Thomas** - An MI6 division head and member of Smith's team.
* **Torrance-Smythe** - An MI6 division head and member of Smith's team. Nicknamed "Smithy."
* **Sergeant George Harrod** - The radioman of Smith's team.
* **Mary Ellison** - A top MI6 operative and lover of Smith.
* **Reichsmarschall Julius Rosemeyer** - The Wehrmacht Chief of Staff.
* **Ethel** - A British undercover agent who poses as a barmaid named "Heidi" in Zum Wilden Hirsch. Pretends to be Mary's cousin.
* **Josef Wartmann** - Owner of Zum Wilden Hirsch.
* **Captain von Brauchitsch** - A Gestapo officer.
* **Jaeger Captain** - A young officer who has a confrontation with Smith over Smith's behavior in Zum Wilden Hirsch.
* **Colonel Weissner** - German Heer officer who captures Smith and Schaffer in Zum Wilden Hirsch.
* **Anne-Marie** - Kramer's secretary and head of the Schloss Adler's female staff.
* **Colonel Paul Kramer** - Deputy Chief of German Intelligence.
* **Helicopter Pilot** - The pilot of Rosemeyer's helicopter.
* **Cartwright Jones** - An American actor.
* **Sergeant Hartmann** - A guard in the Schloss Adler.
* **Colonel Wilhelm Wilner** - Field Marshal Kesselring's chief of staff in Italy.
Baron Ludovico Raddavitch Vespers

Baron Vespers is the captain of the airship Solemn Angel, adventurer extraordinaire, and Etherite contact friendly to the amalgam.

"And so they thought Ludovico would take you on this adventure to destroy a great villain, to discover unclaimed domains of the virtual realm and possibly seize them for himself. They thought right! Man your stations! Engage the phlogiston capacitors!"
Layla Ahmed

Layla Ahmed is the mysterious benefactor who rescued the Roosevelt Group from disciplinary actions after their decision to pursue Andris in the absence of official orders to do so. She also opened up the revenue stream that allowed the amalgam to secure a construct in Washington, D.C. and establish their own mission.

Vice President Ahmed is the first woman and second person of middle eastern descent to achieve a VPO position in the Syndicate. She is also the youngest person currently serving on the board by nearly twenty years.

After an extensively planned strike against Syndicate VPO von Schacten with the Roosevelt Group leading the decapitation, Ahmed was able to seize control of the Special Projects Division. In the resulting disruption of Syndicate command, the convention was thematically reorganized with Ahmed appointing herself to the newly-created position: Senior Vice President of Operations. Presumably, her authority is now second only to that of Control.

Despite these events, Ahmed's mentoring of her favored (?) amalgam can be politely described as aloof.
WHAT THE CLUCK?

"What The Cluck?" is the fifth episode of Season 4.

## Synopsis

The Sharma-Gupta house is rocked by the death of pug matriarch Julianne. Though Harry finds comfort in the presence of his seven other pugs Fran, Maxwell, Howard, Bernadette, Artie, Tina and Ryan Seacrest, Vera finds herself taking the death harder than she ever thought she would. Inspired by the "locavore" movement, Lisa seeks Violet's scientific expertise in setting up a chicken coop behind the Stickitt Inn. While Esther takes to the new setup like a natural, thanks to summers spent on her aunt and uncle's kibbutz, and Jenna's rocking the Midwestern farmgirl vibe, Athena struggles when she discovers that one of the roosters has it in for her. Meanwhile, Cora invites her parents Wesley and Marie to the opening of "Damn Yankovic" to introduce them to JJ's body of work, and Talia is devastated when the board of trustees asks her to choreograph a more traditional production of "The Nutcracker," throwing a wrench in her plans to stage a "Game of Thrones"-themed performance in which Mother Ginger was the Khaleesi.
Technocratic Orders

Official Orders to Operatives of the Technocratic Union from Control are sometimes referred to by field agents as "blacksheets" because of their tendency to contain traces of redacted information or, more bluntly, "obituary notices."

In Chronicle: The amalgam has seen four sets of orders: The original assignment to deep space training, orders to work surveillance in North Carolina, an open assignment to form a construct in Washington, and Mike's orders to make the same transition.
Secret Weapons

As a prized guinea pig for Q Division, you get access to experimental technology!

**Projects Tested**

Solar Bomb (Pale to golden tan in .2 seconds!)

Vibro-Knife (It slices! It dices!)

Rashlight (Great for sleepovers!)

Doomba (Doomba!)

Cherry Vanilla Erg Cola (Taste the cosmos!)

Hench Worms (No! God noooo!)

Erg Bar (Get abducted by flavor!)

EDCU Extra Dimensional Containment Unit (Schachten tested, Schachten approved!)

The Ton Ring (Surprise your crush!)
Bonita Alcott

Bonita "Bonnie" Alcott is an acclaimed opera singer and the daughter of a very rich Boston family. She is in her mid-forties, reportedly widowed, and has an extremely raunchy sense of humor. She teaches in the music department, as well as teaching voice to theater students, and she is the dorm mother of a mostly-freshmen girls' dorm.

Her first cousin once removed, Cora, occasionally performs pop-up concerts on the T with her.

She is married to Jerry Clyde, who is missing at the start of the series. Under the assumption that he is dead, Bonnie enters into a relationship and a questionably-legal union with Jonathan Bates.

She is the loving adoptive mother of Marley Clyde.
MAMA WHO BORES ME

"Mama Who Bores Me" is the eighteenth episode of Season 6.

## Synopsis

After a tense week, Bonnie learns that she and Jerry can move forward in the adoption process. Despite being less than two weeks away from staging her opera "Vai a lucidare il tuo cappello di carta stagnola!", Cora plans a joint "baby" shower (despite Bonnie's new "baby" being in elementary school) for her cousin and Jenna. While Bonnie eagerly soaks up all the information from seasoned parents Violet, Tracy and Maya, the hormonal and irritable Jenna has no time for parenting advice from Culinary Arts coworker Esther, especially considering how much of a total hellion Esther's toddler son is. Meanwhile, Leo makes the mistake of revealing news of his offer to Jillian, who sees the opportunity as one she feels she is equally qualified for and (in an uncharacteristic display of rivalry) attempts to undermine her coworkers to land the position.
SHIPS AHOY-VEY!

"Ships Ahoy-Vey!" is the twenty-first episode of Season 1.

## Synopsis

Drama abounds as the junior and senior classes, chaperoned by Leo, Maya, Cliff, Bonnie, Robert and Jillian, board the Odyssey in Boston Harbor for prom. Heath breaks up with Cliff by text message an hour into the festivities, Bonnie struggles with the fact that her wedding was aboard this same ship, Robert confronts Victoria with the news that her behavior at her current school is threatening her position at Winter Lake, Jillian is smuggling booze for her advisees and Leo and Maya are seasick. On land, Vera faces a new challenge: a very well-known, very well connected, very wealthy celebrity is attempting to get her profoundly obnoxious and untalented son into Winter Lake Academy's theater program for the fall semester months past the admission deadline.
Construct Background House Rules

We’ll add up your “Chantry” background to create an individual accumulation of points before pooling them. Each level is added to the previous level.

So, if you have…

1 Chantry = 1 point

2 Chantry = 3 points

3 Chantry = 6 points

4 Chantry = 10 points

5 Chantry = 15 points

As a group of four technocrats, you could have 60 total points to spend on…

**Chantry Features: Each level includes all previous items**

*Security*

Level 1: A deadbolt (0 points)

Level 2: Computerized locks (2 points)

Level 3: Cameras w/ remote access (5 points) [current level]

Level 4: DNA recognition and intruder tagging (10 points)

Level 5: Perimeter lasers and traps (20 points)

*Amenities*

Level 1: Old warehouse outside of town (0 points)

Level 2: Upstairs of retail property in bad part of town (2 points)

Level 3: Condo in heart of city (5 points) [current level]

Level 4: Luxury condo with amenities (10 points)

Level 5: Penthouse with Technocrat amenities, e.g. training
rooms (15 points)

*Computer*

Level 1: Internet (0 points)

Level 2: Fastest commercially available Internet (1 point) [current level]

Level 3: Room with servers, two towers, and laptops (5 points)

Level 4: Top of the line commercial computers and giant monitors (10 points)

Level 5: Technocratic Trinary Computing Suite (15 points)

*Chantry Retainers*

Level 1: Just Mike (0 points) [current level]

Level 2: And staff for cleaning and repairs (5 points)

Level 3: Eager young intern (10 points)

*Vehicle*

Level 1: Chantry sedan or van (0 points) [current level]

Level 2: Chantry luxury sedan, van, motorcycle (5 points)

Level 3: Sedan is armor plated (7 points)

Level 4: X45 Technocratic Sedan in “Nightshade” Black (12 points)

Level 5: And a goddamn helicopter (20 points)

*Laboratory*

Level 1: Whatever you can cobble together (0 points)

Level 2: Basic biology and crime lab (2 points)

Level 3: University-level biolab equipment and engineering setup (5 points) [current level]

Level 4: Dimensional science lab with pet tentacle! (12 points)

Level 5: Elite Technocratic lab  (20 points)

*Additional Stuff*

AI overseeing computers/security (10 points + computer and security at 5 each)
GOOD KING WENCESLOTH

"Good King Wencesloth" is the tenth episode of Season 4.

## Synopsis

The Nutcracker opens to a packed house and continues to sell out each night. While Talia receives critical acclaim for her staging and the aging trustees breathe a sigh of relief at the absence of sci-fi references and shadow monsters emerging from supporting characters' genitalia, she begins to feel stifled and wonders if she should leave future Nutcracker choreography to the old guard of dance teachers. Bonnie bonds with Esther over holiday preparations and decides to make a sizeable donation to the hospital where Esther's twin sons spent the majority of their short lives. Meanwhile, the same band of students responsible for the prank that got them banned from Colin's fall show break into the Theater Department's storage closet and paint sloth faces on all the commedia masks days before a visiting professor from L'École Internationale de Théâtre Jacques Lecoq is to teach the final master class of the year, and Cliff lands a gig playing J.C. Savior, a hybrid of A.C. Slater and Jesus, in "Saved By The Lord," a traveling 1990s themed Christmas pageant, to the horror of his very Catholic parents.
Acute Cataleptic Porphyria

Called "vampires" in scuttalk, these creatures exhibit strange abilities and a strong aversion to sunlight. Their secretive and sometimes cowardly nature can lower their priority on active kill lists but ACPs interfering directly with Union ideals or timelines should be terminated with extreme prejudice.
Borg

Doctor **Borg** was a jolly roentgenologist who was a mutual colleague of Dr. William Barton and Dr. Tom Morgan. Borg was part of their expedition to search for the Gill Man in the Florida Everglades. Borg proved invaluable to the team, as it was his idea to use an advanced sonar array to locate the creature. Along with Dr. Johnson, he later assisted Barton and Morgan in their surgical transformation of the Gill Man from an aquatic creature into a land one.
The Caldwell Family

## Hailey and Bailey Caldwell

The Caldwell Twins are YouTube sensations who host their own healthy-eating cooking show. Born three months premature, the twins have cerebral palsy and occasionally have seizures which they have found are more manageable when they follow a specific diet. They are discovered randomly by Harry Gupta, and they are approached to be the first mid-year transfers The Academy has had in years. They accept and become students in the Culinary Arts Department. Bailey, whose condition is more severe, has a service dog named Cookie.

## Tim and Martha Caldwell

Tim and Martha Caldwell are Hailey and Bailey's parents, who would do anything for their daughters.
FIFTY SHADES OF EH?

"Fifty Shades of Eh?" is the first episode of Season 2.

## Synopsis

Jillian gets an offer to be the artist-in-residence at a two-week summer camp for the blind. After years of itchy leotards and pinchy character shoes, the gig sounds perfect: a chance to change students' lives through the power of music without the pressure of glamming up. The problem? The camp directors have given the impression to both the incoming campers and their guardians that the actual Celine Dion will be attending. Meanwhile, while on a cruise in the Caribbean with Michelle, Bonnie purchases a filthy romance novel, "Arts of Seduction," as a joke and discovers that it is her young advisee's "real person fiction" with the names poorly disguised. She consults Cliff about it, and he admits that he didn't discourage the young woman from writing as he didn't want to stifle a young person's creative passion. Meanwhile, Vera interviews a few potential new last-minute hires for the faculty, including Jenna Hanson, a brash young physics teacher straight from the GED program at the Minnesota State Women's Penitentiary, and Talia Vergara, choreographer of “CRACKED: A Modern Nutcracker,” and deals with the sudden departure of the head dorm parents in the underclassman boys' dorm.
The Rosencrantz-Guildensterns

Axl Rosencrantz and Carl Guildenstern are workout buddies of Isaiah Chapman.

Although they make a living as personal trainers, they both have a security background and are hired to protect the students after a disturbance during Colin's production of "Death of a Salesman."

They are a married couple and have a toddler daughter named Aimee. They are game show enthusiasts.
EPICs (RDEEPPIC)

A Reality Deviant Exhibiting Enlightenment Psychosis with Paradox Inducement Catatonia (EPIC) usually demonstrates symptoms of one or more mental disorders as classified by the DSM-5 or Technocratic Union DSM-Supplement-18. Unpredictability in regard to both power level and behavior makes these deviants extremely difficult to subdue even before taking into account the inexplicable prevalence of paradox effects in their vicinity. Agents have reported radical forces manifestations and the complete reshuffling of matter patterns when attempting to eliminate these entities.

On a related note, the Technocratic Union takes seriously its responsibility to safeguard the mental health and well being of its agents. Any unusual thought patterns or behaviors should be either self-reported or reported by members of an agent's amalgam for holistic treatment at one of the New World Order's many luxury facilities.

The Roosevelt Group has had at least one *confirmed* encounter with an EPIC when the onset of Jeniffer Caranetti's psychosis while attending college away from home culminated with the attraction of a dangerous extra-dimensional entity. Caranetti herself was subdued and sent away to a Progenitor facility where she as been diagnosed with a form of locked-in syndrome.
OWL IN THE FAMILY

"Owl In The Family" is the fourth episode of Season 8.

## Synopsis

Cliff seeks Leo and Maya's advice after one of his dorm charges, Salvatore, repeatedly slips out after curfew to sleep in the tree tops despite his parents paying an extra twelve thousand dollars a year for him to have a dorm room. After consulting with the boy, it is discovered that Sal is a huge fan of the Method school of acting and he feels that, as supporting character "Warren the Owl" in the fall musical, he must become one with the birds. Heath believes a newspaper article about the situation sent to Sal's parents might convince them to talk some sense into the teen, but Vera puts the kibosh on the idea, not wanting to appear to the public as a school with security lax enough to let a student repeatedly escape. Bonnie and Jerry run into an issue at Marley's school when the sixth-grader signs up for the fall dance and announces her plans to bring high school sophomore Shaquarius, who the horrified administration does not know is middle-school age himself. Meanwhile, despite being grounded into the next century and not even being a theater student, Emily petitions the school to bring back the London trip in hopes of meeting Banksy.
QUOTH THE COLIN, NEVERMORE!

"Quoth the Colin, Nevermore!" is the sixteenth episode of Season 4.

## Synopsis

While the Andrews girls stay back happily in Winter Lake with their new caregiver Hannah, their parents head off to Jolly Old England with fellow chaperones Leo, Maya, Cliff, Ellen, Athena, the adorable Hartz-Song tots and the ten winners of the essay contest. Charles auditions to replace Marius in the West End production of Les Mis and finds that his "audition stomach" does not hit as badly overseas as it does in America, while a short distance away Colin and Violet find a new animal to despise when a flock of ravens attacks them and their tour group at the Tower of London. Meanwhile, Leo and Maya discover that some of their students have been raiding their toiletries, a lonely Athena spends much of a promised "food tour" following Alice around begging her to return to America, and Cliff challenges Ellen to a contest: whoever can seduce a member of the Queen's Guard first gets the finest steak dinner in Boston care of the loser.
Frank Bellamy

Frank Bellamy is the director and producer of the aborted "Arts of Seduction" film. Under pressure from the studio to fulfill his contract after the project goes up in smoke, he travels from Hollywood to the East Coast to seek inspiration.

What he lacks in planning and directorial skills, he makes up for in networking skills and several of the stars from the canceled project come to his aid in some form or another to help him create a new movie.

After Spanish teacher Becca Alvarez is attacked by waterfowl and rescued by intrepid reporter Heath Barr, the idea for the film "Duck Me In The Park" is born and Frank is back in business.
ROSENCRANTZ AND GUILDENSTERN ARE DADS

"Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dads" is the eighth episode of Season 7.

## Synopsis

After a crazed fan attempts to storm the talkback on the closing night of "Death of a Salesman" in order to physically attack Heath and Carey's respective dates, Cliff and Carey's wife, former child star Kayla, Vera pressures the school board to ramp up the security detail and the search is on for two new bouncer-type security guards who will work closely with Hannah and Rocky to prevent future incidents before they start. Promise arrives in the form of Isaiah's workout buddies, Axl Rosencrantz and Carl Guildenstern, personal trainers and dads to a precocious toddler daughter Aimee who they hope to send to a preschool for the gifted. Meanwhile, Isobel raises eyebrows when she suggests a project featuring student-written plays for the winter show, an ambitious endeavor since The Academy does not have any formal playwriting program.
VALENTINE WHERE THE SUN DON'T SHINE

"Valentine Where The Sun Don't Shine" is the fourteenth episode of Season 1.

## Synopsis

Frustrated with their salaries, Cliff and Heath take second jobs as holiday-themed Strip-o-Grams. When a picture of Cliff dressed up in nothing but a Cupid diaper shows up on Portraits of Boston's Facebook page, health class attendance skyrockets but Vera is forced to do damage control when a number of students' parents complain. Harry is forced to do damage control of his own when his prize pug Julianne, a favorite to win at Westminster, has explosive diarrhea all over the Best in Show judge. Bonnie discovers that one of the students in her dorm has been writing graphic "real person fanfiction" about several members of the faculty and does not know whether to praise the young woman for her gift of prose, sensitivity in dealing with the issues of disability and gender transition, razor-sharp accuracy in capturing the voice of each person featured and 10-page panty-melting Leo/Maya love scenes or to recommend the young woman seek counseling because, uh, inappropriate much? Meanwhile, Colin and Violet chaperone the Winter Dance and are shocked to discover that the couple they bust for getting too freaky on the dance floor is a faculty couple.
THE PEOPLE'S REPUBLIC OF WINTER LAKE ACADEMY

"The People's Republic of Winter Lake Academy" is the fourteenth episode of Season 5.

## Synopsis

Vera awakes to the sound of revolution on the hill behind her house. When she is able to quiet it down enough to demand answers, she discovers that there is a rumor that she will be forcing students to wear uniforms (purchased with their own money) from spring break on. As this is untrue, she must find the source of the rumor and silence it before Rania arrives on campus which may prove difficult as the comedian will be touring Europe during much of Cerebral Palsy Awareness Month and plans to perform instead as a pre-show for the Winter Dance. Meanwhile, the Culinary Arts faculty experiences a department first when a spoiled sophomore divas out, deciding on opening night of "A Very Duggar Wedding" that whipping up mass quantities of tater tot casserole is "beneath her," while Robert and Jillian clash over Jillian's refusal to further treat her Celine Dion delusions, now back in full force.
KLINGON TO THE MEMORIES

"Klingon To The Memories" is the eighteenth episode of Season 9.

## Synopsis

Robert, exclusively teaching his creative writing courses until the end of the school year, checks in on his old English classes to see what Holly has been teaching in his absence. Delighted by her course syllabus stating her intent to "look at classic literature through the lens of 20th and 21st century media, and vice versa," he sits in on a lesson. While thrilled to see the students translating the works of JK Rowling and John Green into Shakespearean verse, he is less amused by the three week unit on Klingon syntax and how it can be applied to the Canterbury Tales. Order is restored to the Culinary Arts Department after Julie drafts a peace treaty between students and faculty, and the remaining semester is devoted to eggs. Meanwhile, after several of her students claim to hear Roger's voice in rehearsals for Bonnie's opera "Die Geisterjäger," she asks the head of the music department to hire a ghost whisperer only to be told that the school has already blown the year's music budget on the opera's Stay-Puft-Marshmallow-Man and on replacing instruments that were accidentally left behind at the Gala and vomited in/on by inebriated guests.
Calliope Witherspoon

Calliope Witherspoon is a retired soap opera actress and the grandmother of Winter Lake Academy for the Arts student Fifi Gilman.

After being forced to quit her senior year production of "Anything Goes" for health reasons, she nonetheless ditched Winter Lake for Hollywood right after graduation and enjoyed great success as Sharon Bohner, the ex-sister-wife-turned-hooker-with-a-heart-of-gold, on the ABC soap "Holy Garments," a role for which she earned multiple daytime Emmy nominations.

Although she is still quite financially comfortable, her acting roles have dried up and she now spends a great deal of her screen time hawking pubic bedazzling kits on the Home Shopping Network.
The Gilman Family

## Fifi Gilman

Fifi Gilman is a theater student in the Winter Lake Academy for the Arts class of 2019. She is the daughter of Carolyn Gilman and the late Eric Gilman, and the grandchild (on her mother's side) of retired soap star Calliope Witherspoon (née Callie Murphy) and Jonathan Bates. The identity of her grandfather is a mystery at first, as they bear little resemblance to each other other than their short stature, but as more of Jonathan's past is revealed, all the timelines add up.

## Carolyn Gilman

Carolyn Gilman is the daughter of Calliope Witherspoon and Jonathan Bates. She was conceived during Calliope's senior year at The Academy, when Calliope returned to upstate New York for Thanksgiving break and lost her virginity to a young Jonathan Bates, on break himself from the Finger Lakes School for Aimless Boys. Despite the overwhelming trend of adoption at the time of Carolyn's birth, Calliope kept her daughter and raised her in California.
HARRY POZNER AND HIS POSSIBLY RABID GIRLFRIEND

"Harry Pozner and His Possibly Rabid Girlfriend" is the fifteenth episode of Season 5.

## Synopsis

Vera is thrilled to discover that Rania, on campus for her performance, wants to clear her material with the faculty before presenting it to the student body and is delighted to learn that the comic's material, while slightly risqué, does not paint Winter Lake in a poor light. Unpleasant flashbacks upon arriving at the performance space, however, threaten Rania's willingness and ability to stick to the script. Cora seeks Ellen's advice when she is approached for a gig that is more in Bonnie's wheelhouse. While she knows Bonnie will be supportive, she fears she has big shoes to fill. Meanwhile, midway through a proposal dinner at a local Italian eatery, Jenna and Talia are called back to campus by one of Talia's hysterical advisees when the Winter Dance is evacuated due to the girlfriend of a popular senior music student acting erratically, and it is revealed that said music student is no stranger to experiencing wildlife in his dorm room.
MY GREATEST MISTAKE

"My Greatest Mistake" is the twenty-second episode of Season 5.

## Synopsis

Fifi's mother Carolyn travels to Winter Lake to see her daughter's star turn as the lead's meth-head little sister Sally in "You're Not The Father, Charlie Brown," and is totally enamored with Jonathan's directorial choices. Upon being introduced to his student's mother, Jonathan promptly passes out. The birthstone in Carolyn's necklace corresponds to a month that would put the date of her conception roughly around the time Jonathan, at the time a senior at the Finger Lakes School For Aimless Boys, lost his virginity to Callie Murphy, a Winter Lake Academy girl home for Thanksgiving. Callie became Calliope, Calliope's "health concerns" became a seven-pound baby girl named Carolyn two months after graduation, and long story short, Fifi's suddenly more to Jonathan than the only student who laughs at his corny jokes. Meanwhile, Jillian pays a visit to Esther, Steve and their extremely colicky and disagreeable infant son Ethan in an attempt to cure her "baby rabies" after her doctor suggests her history of brain damage may make her an unfit parent, and Rocky finally cracks the security key on Maggie's old files and reveals the connection between her and the mystery student.
Lisa Soloway Stickitt

Lisa Soloway Stickitt is the owner of the Stickitt Inn, a small boutique hotel located in Winter Lake a short distance from The Academy. When her pastry chef gets deported, she brings in goodies from the Wonderwall Bakery. The Stickitt Inn is located adjacent to an apple orchard, and the hotel includes fresh apple products in its continental breakfasts, including the region's famous Stickitt Inn Cider.

Impressed by the Rockwells, she invites Athena to set up the Culinary Arts Department's home base in her kitchen. Athena accepts and everything works out for a while, but the department is forced to move to nearby Haven Farm when the Board of Health does not look kindly upon a student's service dog being in a professional kitchen.
Marissa Gilmore-Santiago

Marissa Gilmore-Santiago teaches in the Culinary Arts Department. She was the former vice president of 'Wich Please, a chain of panini restaurants. Upon her 26th birthday, Marissa sold her share of the company to a cousin and embarked on a study of molecular gastronomy in which she now apparently feels she is well-versed enough to educate teenagers on the matter.

She suffers from severe anxiety and a condiment obsession.
TIN HATS, WILDCATS, RABID RATS AND BASEBALL BATS

"Tin Hats, Wildcats, Rabid Rats and Baseball Bats" is the fifth episode of Season 7.

## Synopsis

Leo and Maya's friendship with Dave is tested when the activism-happy teacher inspires his junior class to go into Boston to protest shoddy conditions at a new hotel and one of the leads of "Caught In A Rad Bromance" is taken into police custody days before the show opens. Bonnie books a late-night gig at a jazz club and asks Isobel to babysit Marley, a decision she soon comes to regret when Isobel gets the child hooked on Pixi-Sticks and "High School Musical." When a Red Sox wife purchases one of JJ's designs to wear at an upcoming charity ball, she researches his background and falls in love with the mission of The Academy, eventually persuading one of the higher-ups at Fenway Park to let a student from Winter Lake sing the National Anthem at an upcoming World Series game. A student is chosen, with Cora nominated to coach her. There's only one problem: The Chosen One is a born-and-bred Bronx girl and loathes the Sox with a passion. Meanwhile, Frank calls in the favors of his former "Arts of Seduction" cast to fill the roles in "Duck Me In The Park," arranging for Carey Liles, his lead, to shadow Heath at work for research purposes. While initially Heath is thrilled to be working alongside a Hollywood actor (if, perhaps, only for the gossip he might wrangle out of Carey), he underestimates the power of Carey's rabid fanbase that immediately decides, despite Carey's heterosexuality, that he and Heath are "a thing" and goes to terrifying lengths to dig up dirt on Cliff, Heath's actual partner.
YOU CAN GET ANYTHING YOU WANT AT ALICE'S RESTAURANT...EXCEPT A DATE, APPARENTLY

"You Can Get Anything You Want At Alice's Restaurant...Except A Date, Apparently" is the tenth episode of Season 5.

## Synopsis

When Treble's heroics at the Thanksgiving party lead to an extremely positive (and hilarious) review of Alice's restaurant, Athena attempts to pull some strings with friends in high places to get the doctor tickets to see his favorite performer, Kanye West. When she is successful, she plans out an elaborate evening for the two of them, only to learn that Treble plans to take Heath instead. Despite having ended things with Heath and his own history with Treble, Cliff is equally furious and embarks with Athena on a quest to seek (non-violent) revenge. A cozy snow day at home watching hours of sleazy talk shows with his beloved Bonnie leads Jonathan to have vivid dreams of recreating the Maury Povich set for the spring musical, but he learns that he must make some financial sacrifices when Vera places both Leo and Maya on a semester-long fully-paid parental leave and hires their nanny Ellen to temporarily replace them, paying her out of the theater department's budget. Meanwhile, Talia's plans to propose to Jenna are once again foiled on closing night of "Game of Nutcrackers" when the dancer playing Hodor Drosselmeyer accidentally stabs himself with one of the prop swords and Talia must accompany him to the E.R.
Colin Andrews

Colin Andrews is the current director of the Theater Department. He teaches acting as well as a dramaturgy class, and directs the fall "straight play" as well as the spring mainstage musical.

He is married to chemistry teacher Violet Andrews and has four children: Julie, Emma, Matilda and Beatrice.

A very fatherly fellow, he was once a well-respected dorm parent at The Academy, but his contract in the dormitories was terminated after he and Violet failed the school's three-strikes disturbance rule: first for the unplanned two-in-the-morning home birth of Julie in 2004, then a diarrhea-inducing chemical spill in the faculty lounge for which Violet was responsible, followed by an incident involving a sloth and an injury that caused permanent damage to a student.

He has a sister named Nicola.
Schrankgeflüster

"Schrankgeflüster" is Cora Alcott's directorial debut at Winter Lake Academy for the Arts. A staged adaptation of R. Kelly's "Trapped In The Closet," with German translations by Bonita Alcott and Rita McNeil, it is exceedingly popular with the student body and with the soap opera crowd but again horrifies the trustees, who wish the Alcotts would return to either established classics or sanitized original work.
ET TU, BOOTAY?

"Et Tu, Bootay?" is the eighteenth episode of Season 8.

## Synopsis

With rehearsals for the spring show "Julia!" (a gender-swapped musical version of Shakespeare's "Julius Caesar" set in 1980s Long Island) in full swing, the theater department seems to be on top of the world; that is, if Maya and her co-conspirators can keep seventy-six mouths shut about the reason they were missing. Rocky comes down with walking pneumonia and their usual computer-lab supervisor duty is shifted to fiancée Hannah, who discovers a printout of a list ranking faculty and staff by the niceness of their butts stuck in the school's newest laser printer. Meanwhile, with many of the theater students up to their ears in summer-stock auditions, college decisions, and ludicrously involved history assignments (thanks, Dave!), they find themselves too busy to stop by JJ's office for measurements, forcing the designer to work with the information he already has. While the older students don't pose much of a problem, the spring break growth spurts of a few of the underclassmen cause a few near-wardrobe-malfunctions at the initial costume parade and the design team must work overtime to make sure the show is more Flashdance and not Flashass.
The Song Family

## Richie and Anita Song

Richie and Anita Song are the parents of Maya Song and Maggie Song. They are wildly over-involved in Maya's life to compensate for whatever they believe caused Maggie's disappearance in the spring of 2003. While this makes them somewhat irritating, they are also extremely dependable babysitters.

## Maggie Song

Magnolia "Maggie" Song is Maya's fraternal twin sister. At one time a fellow theater student at Winter Lake Academy for the Arts with Leo and Maya, she disappeared under mysterious circumstances during a 2003 production of RENT. Maya doesn't see her until fourteen years later, when Maggie surfaces as an actress once-slated to play the Maya role in an aborted film based on Alysson-Clare Shannon's "Arts of Seduction" series.

## Lucy Song

Lucy is Maggie's daughter and the reason why she had to drop out of the production of RENT.
Jillian Jordan

Jillian "Celine" Jordan teaches Musical Theater 2 and 3. She was hired by The Academy immediately after her graduation from Boston Conservatory. She taught for a few years before getting cast in the national tour of Wicked, where she suffered a career-ending head injury. While she has fully recovered physically, she now conducts her life with the outrageous hand gestures, over-the-top mannerisms and thick French-Canadian accent of Ms. Celine Dion. Winter Lake welcomed her back with open arms after her recovery. She considers herself somewhat of a playwright.

Jillian has sought treatment for her condition, but the operation had questionable levels of success. While it relieved much of her pain and her Celine Dion hallucinations, it triggered momentary blackouts and Liza Minnelli hallucinations instead.

Jillian dates Robert Fry on and off throughout the first five seasons, although she spends a portion of that time posing as the girlfriend of Roger Butts so that he can land an inheritance from the grandmother who wants to see him married off. Jillian and Robert become engaged in episode 6.10, and marry in episode 8.1, spending the majority of their engagement and a year and change of their marriage away from The Academy on a cruise ship where Jillian is performing.
PILOT

"Pilot" is the first episode of Season 1.

## Synopsis

A series of flashbacks introduce us to Vera Sharma and her journey back to Winter Lake Academy for the Arts, as well as the journeys of fellow young alumni (and recently married couple) Leo Hartz and Maya Song. Fast forward to the summer of 2013: A month before school goes into session, Vera and Harry move into the Head's House. Violet Andrews organizes a Welcome To The Neighborhood party, which ends in disaster when one of her kids accidentally leaves the back door open and Julianne, Harry's prize black pug, makes a run for it. The entire staff goes on a wild goose chase around campus to locate the dog. With renovations going on in their new apartment, Leo and Maya struggle to come up with lesson plans while living with Leo's overbearing parents Judy and Elliott.
The Luce Family

## Albert Luce

Albert Luce is the owner of "Luce Stools," a struggling furniture restoration business located in Winter Lake. He is the husband of Brenda and the father of Arabella "Bella" Luce, who run "Bellenda Cleaning."

## Brenda and Bella Luce

Brenda and Bella Luce are the owners of "Bellenda Cleaning." Getting their start in disaster relief after the hurricane that seriously damaged Jenna and the Chang family's neighborhood, Bellenda Cleaning branched out and will now "scrub your bedroom, bathroom, basement, barn, back alley, birth pool, cesspool, swimming pool and/or murder scene top to bottom!" They are hired by the Theater Department to bring a condemned local house up to code in order to use it for a performance space.