Salsa Salvo

## Dialogue

* **L**
*"Ah, my dear friend Cross. We were hoping you'd come by today."*
*"We just signed a major distribution deal with a food manufacturer!"*
*"Are you surprised? We bet you're wondering which of our inventions would be of interest to a food company."*
*"Well, let us tell you—it's a low-calorie, highly-addictive, medicinal salsa!"*
*"It's made entirely out of local Miran fruits and vegetables, including cosse beans, charupa leaves, and cranjelly."*
*"It has virtually no calories, and helps regulate blood sugar while promoting good intestinal health."*
*"Its flavor profile is so complimentary with processed meats, it makes hot dogs exponentially more delicious when applied as a topping."*
*"So delicious, in fact, that test subjects will eat as many hot dogs as you give them in a single sitting!"*
*"Well, are you impressed? You know how much we value your opinion."*
* **Cross**
	+ *Envy*: *Express jealousy over how much money L will make.*
		- **L**
		*"This sort of research is far from our specialty, but it was fun to experiment with the culinary arts and end up with something so interesting."*
		*"Even if it only meets our conservative projections, it should make a considerate amount of money."*
		*"Which we will then use to invent something that makes everyone truly happy!"*
		*"Ah, but we mustn't forget your human aphorism—"pride cometh before the autumn.""*
		*"It is quite possible that we will end up making only molehills out of that mountain."*
		*"We must be careful not to end up failing so dramatically as an inventor that we end up in debt. Like a certain someone we could name..."*
		*"After all, this is nothing more than a hobby to us!"*
		(END)
	+ *Worry*: *Express concern that people will overeat hot dogs.*
		- **L**
		*"That is quite perceptive of you."*
		*"The salsa itself may be free of calories, but that isn't true of hot dogs."*
		*"The addictive properties would all but ensure that our customers would overeat and grow fat."*
		*"What a scandal it would be when customers started growing obese off of a salsa marketed as being low in calories!"*
		*"But...isn't there another side to this scenario?"*
		*"What of the hot dog makers who grow insanely wealthy from our addicted customers?"*
		*"They would emerge with the greatest profits of all, stealing the spotted light from us entirely."*
		*"And when the inevitable class action lawsuit hits, who do you think will be paying the damages? A poor salsa maker? Or the mighty hot dog cabal!"*
		*"As you can see, we've studied your culture. So are you impressed NOW?"*
		(END)
	+ *Advise*: *Suggest that L develop a pizza sauce for the Ma-non.*
		- **L**
		*"The representatives from the food company made the same request."*
		*"They said the Ma-non pizza market is bigger than the human hot dog market by a factor of 20."*
		*"But it's not as if we set out to make a low-calorie highly-addictive medicinal salsa."*
		*"It was just a flute! A lucky accident!"*
		*"So we decided it would be best to take our time and start by selling the salsa."*
		*"After all, a journal of a thousand miles begins with a single successful niche-market product launch."*
		*"And since you had the same idea, we'd be delighted to work with you on the pizza-sauce research."*
		(END)