recursal/Fanatic-Fandom huggingface dataset:
BEAVER LAKE

Greetings, FIENDS!  I was just of making some GOREMET ICE SCREAM.  AHHHHHH!!!!  Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha!  Tonight's DREADFUL DESSERT'S about a backwoods man, who wants to get out of paying his taxes.

The rain poured, as the sound of thunder was heard, on Beaver Lake, in Missouri, back in March of 1958.  In a cabin on the lake's shore, a man slept in a chair.  The sound of thunder woke him, as he coughed.  The man reached for a glass of orange juice and mixed it with a bottle of Popov Vodka, making it a Screwdriver.  He drank part of it.  The man got up, going outside.  In his raincoat and hood, he ran to a truck, in his driveway.  He reached into the truck, where the window was down, started the truck and gripped the steering-wheel.  There was a body of an old man inside, sitting in the driver's seat.  "Well, Mr. Grady, it looks like you won't be collecting property taxes from me anymore" the man said to the corpse.  He turned the steering-wheel, driving Mr. Grady's truck, through the rain, as he walked.  The man drove Mr. Grady's truck off of a cliff, up the hill, yanking his hand out of it and watched it plunge down, into Beaver Lake, where it sank.

He ran back through the falling-rain, into his cabin.  The man took off his raincoat, hung it up in his closet and finished his Screwdriver.  A year later, he went fishing on the shore of Beaver Lake, sitting in the grass.  The man sang, Little Brown Jug.  Suddenly, he heard a bubbly-voice call out to him: "Mr. Quinley!".  Mr. Quinley stopped singing, looking around.  "Howdy?" he called out.  No reply.  Mr. Quinley quit fishing and went inside his cabin.  He sat down in his chair and dozed off.  He awoke, hearing a knock on the door.  Mr. Quinley answered the door.  "Howdy?" he said and found no one in sight.  He closed the door, latching it.  "Need a smoke!" Mr. Quinley said to himself.  He had a cigarette and heard a scraping on his window.  Looking, Mr. Quinley saw the rotting-corpse of Mr. Grady, a skeleton dripping with water.  The zombie was in an old blue raincoat and hood.  It scraped its boney-digits on the cabin-window, as Mr. Quinley screamed in horror.  He grabbed an old screwdriver, running outside and plunging the rusty-tool into the skeleton's skull where there was a hole in its forehead.  The zombie of Mr. Grady ripped it out.  "I FREAKING KILLED YOU MR. GRADY!!!" Mr. Quinley screamed.  "Mr. Quinley!" the zombie responded in its bubbly-voice, plunging the tool into Mr. Quinley's eye, making him swallow and choke to death on his lit-cigarette.

Boy, Mr. Quinley sure got SCREWED...With a SCREWDRIVER in the eye.  What a TOOL he was and what a GHOUL-D Old Mr. Grady turned out to be.  Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha.
SHADOW WORLD

Welcome kiddies, it's your old DEAD WEIGHT, CREEPS again.  Just CRUNCHING A FEW BONES for next week's AXAM heh-heh!  I hope I don't SUCK on the paper, much like the subject of tonight's REVOLTING-REVIEW...

Back in 1953, in the backwoods of Virginia, two teenagers were hiking through it, together, one night.  "How long have we gone so far, Teddy?" one boy asked the other one.  "Seven miles Andrew, I reckon!" Teddy replied and looked at his compass in the moonlight.  Teddy and Andrew came to a campfire in a small clearing.  "Look Teddy!!" Andrew proclaimed, pointing at the fire.  Suddenly, two ladies wandered out of the darkness on the other side of the campfire.  One had: milky-white skin, that was extremely pale, long, blonde hair, dressed in a long and flowing red dress, with black-eyes and glowing-white pupils in them.  The other had: rotted-skin of a greenish-white color, also in a long and flowing red dress, but had long hair of black, with completely black eyes, without pupils in them.

The women approached Teddy and Andrew, looking at them closely in the light of the campfire.  "Howdy, boys, would y'all care to join us in a meal?" the woman with the black hair asked them.  "Howdy, sure please, ma'am.  Thank ya!" Teddy replied.  The two ladies held up long-knives.  "Oh, good!" they replied, showing sharp, long-fangs, revealing themselves to the boys as vampires.  Teddy and Andrew screamed, running.  As they ran, they fell down, into a hole, landing on a table.  They sat up, shaking and looked around, seeing two chairs at the table and a grandfather-clock ticking by close by.  Two lit-tunnels were across from each other in the hole.  The vampires flew down, into the hole and pointed at candles on the table, causing them to light up.  "Welcome to our home we call Shadow World, boys" they said to Teddy and Andrew.  The blonde vampire took her long-knife and cut into her hand, causing green-slime to drip and ooze out from it, into a glass.  The other vampire cut her own head off, causing green-slime to ooze and gush out of it and her neck, as she held her head in her hand.  The boys widened their eyes, seeing a human-skull on a silver-platter on the table and screamed.  Teddy and Andrew jumped high, up, out of the hole, sprawling on the ground.  Teddy helped Andrew to his feet and they ran away, in a hurry.

BONE APPETITE kiddies!  I guess Teddy and Andrew got into a HOLE mess of trouble eh?
Pumpkin-Man

When you find yourself PRESSED FOR SLIME, do what I always do kiddies...really WATCH IT, and don't get too TICKED OFF hee-hee-hee-hee!  But here's a little HOLISLAY STORY for you, about some teenagers who get CLOCKED with horror...

Back on Halloween Night, in 1963, a car was parked in the driveway of a house in a suburb of New Yorlk City.  Within the house, five teenage girls were watching "Dracula" with Bela Lugosi on television in the front room, and they ate popcorn together.  "How is the baby upstairs, Kathy?" one teenage girl wondered to another one, who walked into the living-room.  ""Sleeping and adorable Marcy" Kathy responded to her.  "That's cute" Marcy added.  The telephone rang just then.  Kathy answered it.  "Hello" she said.  "I am Pumpkin-Man, and I am coming soon!" a raspy-voice spoke on the phone then hung up.  "Halloween prankster geesh!" Kathy said to Marcy and the four other girls.

"Relax Kathy, you're jumpy" one teenager told her.  The girl lit a cigarette and smoked it.  "The police might show up Paula" Kathy told her.  "Ah, no they won't" Paula went on.  Paula got up and went to the kitchen, getting more popcorn from the table.  A black-hooded-man with a face like an unlit Jack-o-lantern attacked her suddenly.  He stood in his black and red jester-collar and white robe, choking her with a sickle in his dark-blue hand.  Marcy went to the kitchen and screamed at the stranger.  "It is I, Pumpkin-Man dear" he crooned in a raspy-voice.  Pumpkin-Man chased Marcy into the hall and drove his sickle into the back of her head in the darkness, killing her.

"Are you trying to scare us or something, Marcy and Paula?" Kathy called from the living room on the sofa.  The sickle went straight into the top of her head in the darkness of the room just then.  "KATHY'S DEAD OH MY GOSH!!!!!" the three teens screamed in shocked horror.  They ran from the couch and Pumpkin-Man chased the girls outside to the driveway.  He struck the one with his sickle in her back, and she fell to the ground dead.  The two teens screamed in terror and they got to the car, but Pumpkin-Man laughed with his black Jack-o-lantern mouth.  "Happy All Hallows Eve" the monster wished them, jamming the sickle into the one's forehead in the darkness.  Screaming, the last girl got the sickle buried into her throat in the shadows.

Forty minutes later, a cop came out of the home and gave a baby to a young couple.  "I rescued your baby folks.  These girls were the kidnappers.  Very strange and scary on Halloween to find that all six of them have been murdered!" he inform them.  In the living-room-window, were six human-skulls, all glowing-yellow inside them like Jack-o-lanterns.  The raspy-laugh of the monster known as Pumpkin-Man was heard then, as he stood waving in the backyard, without his hood on and his robe and collar was now dark-blue like his hands.

That really made me SICKLE TO MY STOMACH!  Oh, well, at least Pumpkin-Man saved the baby and GOT A-HEAD...SIX HEADS OF CORPSE aha-ha-ha-ha-ha.
Hidden In The Garage

Hello again, Kiddies.  You have caught your Old Pal, CREEPS, going TREASURE HAUNTING Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha!  Don't worry, I always glady SCARE the GHOULD I find with people.  I also DUG UP tonight's tale.  It's a TASTY-TIDBIT, about an OLD-SLIMER, who finds out where his elderly neighbor’s been lately.

Back in 1950, in a neighborhood in Los Angeles, California, an elderly man walked out, onto his front porch one morning.  He looked over to the next-door house.  The elderly man drank a bottle of wine and went back inside his home.  "I haven't seen Christopher in two months straight, Jane" the elderly man said to an elderly lady walking up the front hallway.  "Oh, I hope he is alright, Douglas" Jane replied.  "So do I darling!" Douglas told her, kissing his wife on the cheek.  Later at noon, Douglas walked over to Christopher's house next-door, ringing the doorbell.  He waited for a minute and tried the door, finding it was unlocked and went inside.  "Christopher, it's Douglas.  Are you alright?" Douglas called out.  The front parlor was empty and quiet.  Douglas wandered through the parlor to the hall, where he opened a door.  It led into the garage.  "Hello, Christopher?" he called out in there.  Then, he saw somebody smoking a cigar in a chair by the car.  Douglas looked at the person in the chair.  "CHRISTOPHER???" he screamed in terror.

In the chair smoking, sat a decaying corpse.  It sat in a light-blue bathrobe and slippers, with skin missing from the skull.  The eyes were missing and its gray-hair had grown very long.  The zombie of Christopher waved his boney-hands, that rotting, pale-white skin was peeling from.  "Hi Douglas, I have been in here this entire time.  I smoked to death two months ago!" the zombie of Christopher croaked in a hoarse-voice that was raspy and distorted.

That was quite a BONE-NUS for Ol' Christopher wasn't it Kiddies?  I guess Ol' Douglas walked into that situation...DEAD FIRST!  HEE-HEE
Spring 2016 - R1: Making Music

## Spring 2016 Release One: Making Music

Fantasy and Fairytales is a playful look at the fun adventures we can take with our little ones through stories and art. This collection invites you to curl up with your little one's favorite book or nursery rhyme and fly with a dragon or a pegasus, help the three little kittens find their lost mittens, or kiss a frog prince! Enjoy a moment in a world where the cow jumps over the moon and sea monsters and fairies are real and we can be anything we dream! - Kickee Pants Clothing Tag

**Release Date:** January 15, 2016

**Theme:** Making Music

**Notable Information:**

This was the fourth in a series of six releases that together made up the "Discovering Life" Collection.

## Styles

* Style One
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* Style Two
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* Style Three
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* Style Four
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* Style Five
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Children Of The Wheat

Oh, how would you enjoy some HORROR-D'OEUVRES, Kiddies?  Why, they're just a little something I CRYPT UP IN THE KITCHEN aha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!  We have a SCARE-RAY OF HUMAN-FINGER FOOD and SKELETON-GELATIN for starters.  Our MAIN CORPSE, is a TASTELESS-TIDBIT about an old farmer who has a rather FANG-TASTIC NIGHT, I am calling...

The late afternoon in March of 1901, had a cool wind blow through a wheat field in southwest-Kansas.  An old farmer had a drink from a bottle of Strawberry-Flavored-Ripple on his back porch, as he stood, looking at the field.  He noticed a group of six scythes rise up, out of the wheat field suddenly. The scythes moved along in the field and the farmer heard the laughter of children.  One child came out of the field, holding a scythe in her hand.  The farmer got a look at her.  She wan an albino and was clothed in a blue dress, walking to him in her bare-feet.  She opened her mouth showing fangs, being a vampire and hissing.  The farmer gasped and ran inside his farmhouse, latching his backdoor.

Later that evening, the old farmer slept in a chair in his living-room, while outside, the sounds of children laughing came accompanied by the six scythes scratching the farmhouse-window.  The farmer woke up, seeing six albino children, three boys and three girls, glaring in the window at him.  The window flew-open and the children climbed in.  The boys were dressed in red dress-shirts, dress-pants, in their bare-feet, having straight-hair, and the girls in blue dresses in their bare-feet, having long-straight-hair.  "What do you children want?" the farmer asked in fear.  "We are Children Of The Wheat and we come to you for the flesh of an unholy human sir" one of the girls answered him, hissing.  "There is my Wife asleep in there.  She has always been extremely mean to me for years now.  Take her!" the farmer quivered, yelling and telling the Children Of The Wheat. "Donald you idiot, who are you speaing too?  You woke me up you jerk!" an old woman's voice called out from the other room.  "Thank you sir" the same vampire girl replied to the farmer and the vampires entered the bedroom.  Donald heard his wife suddenly scream and scream, as the Children Of The Wheat laughed and hissed.  Within the dark bedroom, the vampires brought their scythes down to the writhing-old lady in bed.  A sickening-slash silenced her screaming.  Donald slowly smiled, as the sounds of sucking, slurping and feasting came from the Children Of The Wheat.

I don't know about you, but I thought that ending SUCKED...BLOOD THAT IS hee-hee-hee-hee-hee.  But looks like old Donald finally found out WHEAT TO DO ABOUT HIS WIFE eh?  Those Children Of The Wheat were quite CUT UPS with her in the end heh-heh-heh.
"DICKSON HOMESTEAD"

Heh-Heh-Heh!  You boys and girls caught me in the middle of watching a bit of baseball.  That's right Kiddies, my favorite BASEBALL SCREAM, are THE BOSTON DEAD SOCKS!  Hee-Hee-Hee.  Our GAME-PLAY tonight is in the SLUG-OUT and shall really put you kids in THE SPIRIT OF THE GAME.

One evening back in 1933, a man and woman arrived in a car at an old Victorian-style home in northeastern-Maine.  It was storming out and they rushed into the house, finding it unlocked.  "I don't think anybody lives here anymore, Carl" the woman said to the man, looking around the darkened-hallway.  "Yes no one seems to, Kate my dear!" Carl replied to his wife.  Carl and Kate went into the old parlor at the other end of the hall and suddenly, a fire appeared in the fireplace.  The couple gasped in surprise and horror.  Footsteps began walking around out, in the hallway, extremely loudly.  Carl glanced quickly out, into the hall, seeing nobody, but hearing the footsteps coming closer.  He screamed.  "WHAT IS IT DARLING?" Kate screamed at him.  "No one's out there dear!!" he replied.  When the sounds of the loud-footsteps entered the parlor, Kate screamed and Carl held onto her.  Deep, bellowing-laughter started up and then an apparition materialized.  It was a male giant a full eight-feet tall.  The ghost was dressed in a white suite and a black tie, with curly, white-hair and its skin was as white as snow and extremely pale.  The phantom of the giant wore black boots and he glared down, at Carl and Kate, with his dead-eyes of pure-black and ran his ghostly-fingers through his little, black-mustache.  The couple stood frozen in fear and speechless, gazing up, at the giant spirit.  The ghost of the giant grinned, with an eerie, grinning-face and shrieked out this ghastly, deep-laughter, vanishing.  Carl and Kate heard the loud-footsteps once more, move through the hallway and when they heard the ghostly-laughter again, they screamed and fled.

Hee-Hee, well, that ghost was quite FIRED-UP near the FIREPLACE that is eh, Kiddies?  Carl and Kate found out what he was IN THE SPIRIT about heh-heh-heh!
THE 4 A.M. CALLER

I have to call for a RE-SCARE-MAN to fix the FRIGHTS IN MY CASTLE HERE, girls and boys.  I still have an old MOAN BOOK with many NASTY-NUMBERS TO DIE-AL aha-ha-ha-ha-ha!  Which reminds me of a TALE OF TELEPHONE TERROR, about a mysterious woman who calls a man at FOUR O'CLOCK IN THE MOANING...

A man was sleeping in bed one night in his apartment in Owl Creek, Wisconsin, back in the early-winter of 1979.  His telephone rang, waking him up, and he checked his alarm clock.  It read, "4 a.m." and he answered the phone in the hallway.  "Hello?" the guy mumbled, with a big yawn.  "Johnny, I am on my way to you.  It's cold and a blizzard, but I have something for you" a woman's voice spoke over the phone.  "Um, how do you know my name lady?" the man wondered to her, but she hung up.  The next evening, Johnny was sleeping in bed as usual, when the phone rang, waking him.  The alarm clock read: "4 a.m." again.  He picked up the phone and the woman's voice spoke to him: "Johnny, I got into a horrible wreck but I still am on my way to you!".  She hung up then.  Johnny discovered a package on his stoop later on that morning.  In the blizzard, he opened the yellow round box and saw a human-finger-bone with a gold ring on it.  He let out a scream.  Ten minutes went by, and the police were at his doorstep.  The cops left with the package.

At 4 a.m., Johnny was by his telephone.  The telephone rang right then and he immediately picked up, firmly speaking: "who the heck are you ma'am, a psycho?".  "Hello Johnny, I am at your door.  That was the gold ring that you gave me back in high school" the woman spoke to him on the phone.  Johnny hung up and heard knocking on his door.  He grabbed a baseball bat and answered the door.  In the falling snow was a woman all rotting bones, and her eyes were missing.  She wore orange bell bottoms and a yellowish blouse with blue flowers on it.  Her hair was long, ratty and red.  Johnny screamed in horror, beaning the zombie in his skull.  But the skeleton stepped into his home and he ran out the backdoor.  He got to some woods behind his apartment and made it to a ditch with a wrecked car in the snow.  Its headlights were on.  The zombie of the lady was in the car and Johnny noticed her one skeletal-finger was gone. "Ellen?!  I gave you that ring because your Boyfriend broke with you!" Johnny screamed in terror at the zombie.  The skeleton of Ellen grazed her boney-fingers through her ratty hair and Johnny ran back to his house.  The phone rang.  He picked it up.  "I wanted to finally thank you for it, Johnny!" Ellen spoke over the phone and hung up.

Well that tale really had quite A RING TO IT eh, Kiddies?  Too bad for Johnny.  Ellen would've made a pretty good GHOULFRIEND for him hee-hee-hee-hee!
My Pretty Pony

Well hello kiddies.  I am CREEPS, your BEST FIEND and GHOST-HOST OF CORPSE ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.  This tale for this SHRIEK, has some HORSING AROUND in it, IN-STEED!  It occurs on a FARM OF FRIGHT and I call it...

On a big farm in southern-Ohio, back in 1931, a young farmer milked his cow early one morning.  When he got done, he suddenly heard a neigh of a horse in the barn.  He glanced around and was about to leave the barn, when he saw a shape out of the corner of his eye.  The farmer looked, seeing it was the shape of a pony, moving into one of the stalls.  The farmer walked over to the pony, noticing that it was rather dead-looking.  The pony was a pale-blue color and the insides of its ears were shining-white along with its eyes and nostrils.  "My pretty pony?!?" the farmer exclaimed.  The pony glared up at him, vanishing.  The farmer gasped in fear and ran out of the barn.

Later on that night, the farmer was sitting in his old chair in his front room, reading a book and drinking a bottle of wine.  He glanced out the window and saw a pair of shining-white eyes glaring in at him.  He gasped in fright, dropping the book on the floor.  As he gazed back at the glowing-white eyes in the darkness, he heard the noise of a distinct whinny and the window fogged up benaeth the eyes.  With the sound of a neigh, it was the ghost of the farmer's pony.  The eyes disappeared in the night and the farmer rushed outside where they had been, turning on a lantern beside his farmhouse.  Looking, he saw the distinct hoof-prints of the apparition of the pony in the dirt.

That ghostly pony sure took a SHRIEK IN THE WINDOW...I mean a PEEK heh-heh.  The phantom sure didn't STALL FOR TIME in disappearing from in that STALL in the barn eh?  Oh well, at least in the end, the farmer finally SHED SOME LIGHT ON THE SITUATION hee-hee-hee-hee-hee!
TRICKS AND TREATS

Ha-Ha, greetings once more, kiddies.  I, CREEPS, am going TRICK-GORE-TREATING tonight, and what better SLAY to start the evening, than with a FLESH-CRAWLER like this one heh-heh...

It was Halloween Night, back in 1969, that an old man answered his door in a small town in northeast-Indiana.  Kids in costumes were on his doorstep and they all chimed: "trick or treat!".  "Well now, here is some tasty candy for all of you children" the old man replied, dropping Hershey Bars and Reese's Peanut-Butter Cups in the children's pails and bags.  "Thank you mister" the kids said, gratefully and ran off.  The old man closed his door mumbled to himself, "Halloween is my favorite time".  He walked to his recliner in his front room and sat in it, with the bowl of candy in his lap.  He slowly dozed off, asleep.

The telephone rang and woke the old man.  He yawned and answered it on the side-table by his chair.  "Hello.  Oh, hi Marjorie.  Yes, it was a fun Halloween.  I still have some candy here.  Oh, alright.  I have my front door unlocked, Sweetheart.  Goodbye" he said and hung up.  He got up and went to the kitchen, getting a bottle of Jack Daniel's Whiskey out of the refrigerator.  The old man popped it open and drank some down.  He returned to the front room, where he spied some bones at the bottom of the staircase.  "What on Earth is that now?!?" the old man spoke, going over to it.  The bones were a skeletal-hand, and he screamed, seeing that it was attached to a whole skeleton.  "Wait just a minute, I remember what happened now!" he said to himself.

Soon, a woman came to the old man's house, opening the front door.  "Hello Dad, Happy Halloween" she said, walking inside.  The old man hugged her in the front room.  "Marjorie, thank you for dropping by.  Happy Halloween dear" he replied, smiling.  "I had a little fall a year ago down the stairs, but I am fine now!" explained.  "Oh, I am so sorry Dad, you should've called way, way back then" Marjorie said, kissing his cheek.  She walked into the kitchen, as her father shut his front door.  When he turned, his face under his white hair had changed, having half of it in shadow.  The other half was decaying and his eyes were pitch-black with little white-pupils, with his teeth a dead-rotting-yellow.  He stood in his brown sweater, pants and loafers, with his white collar and disappeared, being a ghost.

Hee-Hee, well, wasn't that quite a CHANGE OF FACE, kids?  Good thing Marjorie's Father remembered what happened to him on the staircase when he saw that skeleton, because NOBODY else would've noticed ha-ha-ha.  Well, at least he was in the HALLOWEEN SPIRIT, BEING THE SPIRIT THAT IS heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-heh!
DOG FOOD

Well, Kids, I hope you all like dogs, because our SCREAM-STORY'S about KIBBLE AND HUMAN-BITS ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.

It was a cold evening back in the winter of 1922, when a man heard his doorbell ring in his home, in northwest-Virginia.  He was in the hall and answered the door to an older gentleman.  "Ah, Dr. Peterson, thank y'all for coming tonight.  Please come in!" the man invited the older gentleman, smiling and shaking his hand.  "Good evenin', Mr. Duncan.  Thank you!" Dr. Peterson replied, stepping inside.  Dr. Peterson followed Mr. Duncan upstairs to a parlor, where Mr. Duncan poured out wine from a bottle, into two glasses.

He handed one glass of wine to Dr. Peterson.  "Thank you sir.  Now, let's begin your home counseling session" Dr. Peterson said to Mr. Duncan.  "You're welcome Doctor" he replied and they drank their wine.  "To ease and relieve the stress from your factory position Mr. Duncan, I shall give to you mild sedatives to give you maximum rest!" Dr. Peterson explained.  Mr. Duncan took a seat on his couch in the corner, and the psychiatrist handed him a glass of water, taking his wine away.  He gave hime three pills and Mr. Duncan took them with the water.  He quickly fell asleep.

Four hounds came into the parlor.  "How about some dog food boys!" Dr. Peterson said to them and aimed a knife at Mr. Duncan's throat.  Four hours later, the doctor left the parlor, with the dogs licking their chops.  Early the next morning, Dr. Peterson awoke in his bed, going to the ice-box and drinking a bottle of milk.

A knocking on his front door was heard and it flew open, with the hounds scurrying into the room, along with shadowy-legs.  The hounds entered the kitchen and a distorted-voice croaked: "Y'all fed me to m'dogs Doctor.  I have to prepare more dog food for their dessert!".  In came the zombie of Mr. Duncan, a rotting-skeleton covered in dark-slimy-ooze.  The corpse crept to the doctor, who screamed over and over.  The decayed-skeleton got a cleaver and drove it into the doctor's chest, killing him, as the corpse laughed.

I guess Mr. Duncan got FED UP with Dr. Peterson HOUNDING HIM eh, kiddies?  He sure had a BONE TO PICK WITH HIM hee-hee-hee.
"OUR SON HAS COME HOME!!"

This story is a BIT BUBBLY Kiddies!  It's about an evil Father whose Son is rather DEAD RIGHT in the CREEPY-CONCLUSION of this DREADFUL-DILEMMA!  This HEARTWORMING TALE is called...

One day back in the Spring of 1950, a young boy was swimming in a lake down in southern-Georgia.  A young man watched him from on shore.  "Y'all won't be comin' back home with me Henry" the man called to the boy, drinking a bottle of Jack Daniel's Whiskey.  "What Pa?" the boy called back to the man and the man went into the lake and held his son's face down into the water, drowning him.  Six years later, the young man was smoking a cigar, reading a newspaper in a rocking-chair on his front porch one evening.  "George, supper's ready!" a woman's voice called out from in the house to the man.  "Alright Maddie I'm comin' Sweetheart" George called back and got up, going into the house.  George kiseed Maddie on her lips in the dining-room and sat down at the table with her.

The doorbell suddenly rang.  "Dagnabbit, who could that be at suppertime?!" George exclaimed, angrily.  He answered the door and didn't see anybody.  "Hello?  Y'all come out from hidin' ya hear now!" George called out, but a hot-breeze blew through the trees.  George slammed the door shut and found Maddie looking out the living room-window.  "OUR SON HAS COME HOME!!" Maddie yelled at George.  "What in tarnation are you yammering about Maddie??" he carried on in reply and took off out the door.  George looked around and saw a ghostly-skeletal-hand clutch his wrist.  It was the ghoulish-looking zombified-ghost of his son Henry.  The ghostly-zombie of the boy was a sickening-light-blue color and he stood, covered in pond-scum and underwater-plants.  The zombified-spirit gurgled and spewed a combination of water and blueish-slime out of its boney-mouth.  George screamed and screamed, as the ghostly-zombie plunged its other underwater-plant-covered-ghostly-hand into his stomach, twisting the ghostly-bones of it around.  George coughed, sputtered out his pipe and was killed.  The ghostly-zombie tore its hand out of the stomach of the corpse and vanished with it.  Moments later, it was sinking down, into the pond, holding his father's body, pulling it down beneath the surface of the water with it's rotting, ghostly-hands of blue-bones.

Heh-Heh, poor George had to really POND-ER who was at the GORE eh?  When he saw that it was his Son Henry, he ended up not HAVING THE STOMACH to see him hee-hee-hee!
Evening Of Horror

Hee-Hee hello Kiddies.  Your old Pal, CREEPS, is also a TAXI SCAB DRIVER!  That's right, I drive folks up and down SLAIN STREET for some CAB SCARE heh-heh-heh-heh!  Speaking of cabs, this little RANCID-RIDE, shall DRIVE YOU INSANE!  I call it...

A man was driving on a rain-soaked road out, in the wilderness of western-Alabama, as it was sprinkling out, on a night back in 1954.  He played, "Dear John" by Hank Williams on his car-radio and came to a large home.  He knocked on the door and a young lady answered it.  She was in a silver-robe, with a silver-turban on and her skin was very pale.  She hid her face with a mask of light-blue.

"Good evening, miss, my car won't start.  May I please use your telephone?" the man explained to her then asked.  "Yes sir.  This way please" the lady replied and he followed her inside.  As the man followed the young lady up a hall, he pulled a gun from his jacket-pocket.  "Alright lady, I'm robbing y'all.  Give me any valuables or I shoot!" the man explained to her.  She turned around and gasped.  "Oh, let me get them sir" she laughed, mysteriously.  "Excuse me please" the lady said and walked into another room.

The man grabbed a cigarette from his pocket along with a match and lit it, smoking.  The lady returned carrying a battle ax and she removed her light-blue mask.  The man screamed and screamed.  The lady's face was pale-white and dead, her eyes a pupil less-white, with a small cut off-like nose.  She peeled back her lips, showing yellowish-fangs sharp and pointy.  "I am a vampire sir and since you were going to shoot and rob me, I  quickly decided to make you my bloody drink of the week!" the lady explained, revealing to him.  The vampire swung the battle axe at the man and the man's shadow on the wall, fell to the floor and his screams stopped.  The vampire slumped over the neck of the man's corpse and inserted her fangs into his throat, tearing and hissing.

How did you boys and girls like that DISGUSTING-DISH?  That vampire sure gave that guy what HE AXED FOR and he was quite THE CUT UP too ha-ha.  Well, until my next ICKY-ISSUE OF NAUSEATING-NOVELLAS, BOOGEY WITH THE BOOGEYMAN kids he-hee-hee!
The Abandoned Home On Vine Street

There you are kiddies!  Welcome to my CASTLE as well as my own little GROCERY GORE!  I have everything you need, from CANS OF WHIP SCREAM, to my favorite brand of CHEESE AND HACKERS ha-ha-ha-ha.  Oh, and we also have a HACK-OFF GOOPON for a tale about a boy, who runs from some local bullies...

A boy walked down Vine Street in a small village in southeastern-Kansas, on a Summer afternoon back in 1951.  He stopped in the street, seeing an abandoned home a few yards away from him.  The boy began whistling: "Oh When The Saints Go Marching In" and saw four bullies riding bikes onto Vine Street.  "Hey, there he is!  Charlie.  The freak!!" one of them told the others, seeing the boy.  Charlie stopped whistling and ran for it.

He tried the door on the abandoned home, found it unlocked and rushed inside.  Old furniture filled the front room and cobwebs and immense dust covered everything.  Charlie heard the door open and ran down the cellar-steps.  When he reached the bottom, he heard the bullies laughing and walking around.  They descended the cellar-steps soon and Charlie hid under the stairs.  "Aha, there he is boys!" the one bully told the others, spying Charlie.  The bullies each lit cherry-bombs, surrounding Charlie.  The cherry-bombs went off, exploding and Charlie fell to the floor, yelling.  The bullies laughed as two of them drank bottles of gin.

A pipe in the basement broke open, as one of the bullies kicked Charlie in the side.  The bullies all looked and an orange-glow of light shined out of the one end of the broken-pipe.  One bully started screaming being gripped by something unseen in the light.  His head was twisted around in the light and he was dead.  The other bullies screamed and Charlie got up, running upstairs.  He gazed downstairs, seeing the orange light and hearing the bullies screams being choked off.  He ran for the door, hearing footsteps ascending the cellar-stairs.

He turned and saw a creature, with gray, rotting-skin lurch into the room.  It was very tall and bald, having fangs of black and black-ooze seep out of its mouth.  It wore suspenders of yellow and in its black-clawed-hands, it clung onto the dead-bodies of the bullies.  Charlie looked into the monster's glowing-eyes of orange, as it breathed-deeply and he fled.

That monster got all those bullies to PIPE DOWN and become DEAD SILENT hee-hee-hee!  Well, Kiddies, since you were all busy cutting GOOPONS, let me do a SLICE-CHECK for you all heh-heh-heh!
MONSTER HUNTER

How about a GAME OF RED HOT POKER, Kiddies?  I must admit that I like POKING AROUND in it.  You might say I'm quite a CARD eh?  Aha-ha-ha-ha!  I have A FOUR OF HUMAN-HEARTS here and also a tale in my DERANGED-DECK, that DEALS with a cop who wants revenge on a monster, in a bit of CHIN RUMMY entitled...

The snow-covered pines blew slightly in the icy-breeze over in France one day.  It was in winter, 1935, and a policeman drove his patrol-car to a cabin among the pine trees.  As he came in the door, a windowpane smashed and a clawed-hand jutted through it.  A young lady and a girl and boy gasped and screamed, huddled together by a cast-iron stove.  A white-skinned creature smashed its way into the cabin, attacking the woman and children.  Its eyes were solid-black, its lips were black, and its hair was mangy and white, as it ripped its claws into their clothes.  The policeman shot the monster in its white cloak, with his gun.  The thing growled lowly at him with piercing-fangs and fled out the door.  The officer slammed the door, latching it tight and then peered out the broken-window.  The woman and children gasped and calmed down on the floor.  A decade later, the cop was chopping logs with a teenage boy.  "Very good Son, nice and easy.  Remember to steady your axe like I am now" he said to the teen.  "Thank you, Father.  It was around this time in Winter ten years ago, that you saved Alice, Mother and I from that thing that broke into our cabin" he responded.  "Ah, yes it was.  Your Mother, Sister and you were shaking badly I recall, Raphael" the cop remembered.

That night, Raphael and Alice kept warm by the fire in their cabin, while their father drank a bottle of French Whiskey in his rocking-chair.  "I am going to catch that monster perhaps this Winter this year Sarah my love" he told Raphael's mother in the rocking-chair next to him.  "Oh, you always say that each Winter, Louis!" Sarah replied.  Louis went outside in the falling-snow with a lit-lantern and a shotgun.  Only the sound of the wind was heard and Louis went deep, into the woods, shining his lantern in each direction. Claws gripped his head suddenly.  Louis screamed in horror, firing his shotgun.  The monster growled deeply and scraped Louis's neck with its jagged-claws.  Claw-marks were visible on his neck and the monster attacked Louis as he fought back.  The white-skinned beast gouged its fangs into Louis's arm, biting him viscously, and then Louis pulled the trigger, shooting the thing in its fanged-mouth just as it was going to bite him more.  The thing slumped over dead in the snow.  Louis caught his breath, wandering off.

   Louis finally did get to HAVE A SHOT AT IT eh?  Why, his aim was FANG-TASTIC hee-hee-hee-hee!  He was a very determined HAUNTER indeed heh-heh-heh-heh!
Missing

Greetings boys and girls.  This is your FIEND, CREEPS, HACK with my TWENTIETH ISSUE OF CREEPS CASTLE!  Come in and get ready for a creepy mystery that's literally OUT OF THIS WORLD HEH-HEH, I call...

It was back in the summer of 1964, that a teenage boy drove his truck down a country-road in southern-Kentucky.  He drove in the night, with Ben E. King singing, Stand By Me, on the truck-radio and the teenager saw something glowing-white up ahead, where the road went into a thick woods.

He gasped and hit the breaks, stopping in front of it.  It was a five-foot tall alien, glowing-white, slowly creeping along the road.  It resembled a sheet with two legs.  The teenage boy snapped the truck-radio off and watched the creature silently.  The alien crossed the road and slipped into the woods.  "I want to go with that alien!" the teenager said to himself, got out of his truck, saw it in the wilderness and followed it in his loafers.

He turned on his flashlight, shining it into the woods.  The teenage boy stepped into the wilderness, moving quietly and slowly behind the alien.  The creature kept moving slowly, never turning around.  Twenty minutes later, the alien went behind a tree and the teenage boy stopped, shining his flashlight on the tree-trunk.  There then was a noise of a low-pitched bubbling and the boy got to the tree, gazing around.  The alien turned around and was the thing making that sound.  "I want to go with you please.  I've always loved hearing about aliens as a young boy!" the teenager said to the creature.  He turned off his flashlight and the alien's glow brightened, illuminating him, as it continued making that low-bubbling sound.  Then, a yellow-light suddenly shined down on the boy and he looked up.  "Far out!" he whispered.

The following morning, a cop pulled up behind the truck and got out of his car.  He examined the truck and looked into the forest.  He walked into the thick woods and found a pair of loafers on the ground.

Well, talk about a WALK IN THE WOODS!  That teenage boy really wanted to see where that alien was going in that FEAREST HEE-HEE!
Mr. Rubin

Hello kiddies, it is I, CREEPS, welcome back to my CASTLE!  You know, in my collection of stories, I sometimes come across a few that really SUCK, although they're rather FANGTASTIC ha-ha-ha!  Like this shrieks tale!

In New York City, back in 1957, there was a boy who rode his bike down a neighborhood, early one morning.  He passed by one of the homes and stopped.  Looking into one of the side windows closely, he saw an old man wave and smile at him from inside.  The boy smiled and waved back.  Then he rode off on his bike, seeing another boy on a bike up, ahead.  "Hey, Chuck wait up!" the boy called out to the one up, ahead.  He caught up to Chuck, as Chuck slowed down.  "Hey, Eddie, how's it going?" Chuck asked the other boy.  "Pretty good man, thanks.  You?" Eddie replied, then asked.  "The same man" Chuck said.

The old man was still standing by the window in the house, as Chuck and Eddie rode by.  "Mr. Rubin is a nice guy y'know!" Eddie told Chuck.  "Yeah, but I only met him once" he replied.  The boys rode to one end of the neighborhood, stopping when they saw three older bullies standing and blocking their way.  "Hey, punks, hold it!!" one of the bullies told Chuck and Eddie.  "What do ya guys want Sam?" Eddie asked the bully.  "We just want to play a little game punk" Sam replied.  "Yeah, dork!" the two other bullies said to Eddie.  "Come on guys, let us by!!" Chuck begged Sam and the two others.  Sam and his friends punched Chuck and Eddie in their stomachs, knocking them from their bikes.  They hit the street and cried out in pain, panting and gasping for air.  Sam and his friends kicked them and ran away.

Minutes later, an old hand helped the boys to their feet.  "Mr. Rubin sir" they said, seeing the old man.  "Yes, boys, I'll help you!" Mr. Rubin answered, brushing them off.  Later that night, Chuck and Eddie walked down the same neighborhood, together.  They came to Mr. Rubin's house.  The door opened and Mr. Rubin called to them: "boys, come on in".

Chuck and Eddie went into his home and Hank Williams sang, "Dear John" on a radio in the kitchen, when they entered it.  They looked at Mr. Rubin, seeing he had a white-glow around his face, including glowing-white eyes as well.  He wore his normal brown, buttoned-down shirt, pants and shoes and scratched his bald head, as he peeled back his lips, showing black-fangs that jutted out of his mouth, piercing-sharp and quite long.  "Mr. Rubin?!?" the boys gasped in fright.  "Yes, I am a vampire boys.  I took care of those bullies earlier today.  They won't harm you any longer!" Mr. Rubin explained, revealing the dead bodies of Sam and the two others.  The bodies were slumped over the table in chairs.  Mr. Rubin took a boiling pot from his stove, showing the boys three boiling livers inside it.

Wasn't Mr. Rubin reaching his BOILING POINT kiddies?  Hee-Hee!  Well, that just goes to show you, being an old vampire really SUCKS ha-ha-ha!
The Return of Chef (South Park)

### Story Summary

Old video footage shows Cypher being trapped in a bunker, recording his last words until the video feed shuts off. Meanwhile, Segaboy finds Wiiteen out of town and still alive. Segaboy tries to get Wiiteen to come back but he refuses at first until Segaboy brings him something to review together. However, even after, he still doesn't want to leave. Segaboy informs him that a general named Malin took over their town for several months and has Cypher held hostage. Then, Wiiteen agrees to go with him to stop the general and save Cypher.

### Thoughts on the Episode

Chef's departure from the show was definitely an ugly one. They use old clips of Chef so they don't have to bother bringing Issac Hayes (the actor who played Chef) back, create a confusing plot around it, kill him off very brutally, and put the blame on the members of Scientology, who they made fun of enough to make Hayes leave. If anything, the writers should be blamed not only for this episode but for making Hayes leave in the first place.

### My Personal Thoughts

The review itself took several months to complete due to time constraints and the story was based off tragic events that happened in real life that almost got the show cancelled. This is the first episode that uses its new animation style.
Rebecca

There you are my FIENDS.  This DEADTIME-STORY will have your FLESH CRAWLING by the end of it.  This PETRIFYING-PLAY is called...

There was a woman who was at a bus stop one evening back in 1961, sitting on a bench in a Brooklyn, New York rainstorm.  She had an umbrella and shivered from under it, as a taxi stopped at the bus stop.  "Evenin' miss, would you like a ride?" the cab driver called to her after he rolled down the passenger-door-window.  "Evening sir, yes please.  Thank you very much" she answered and got in the car.  The taxi cab drove off in the pouring-rain.  The driver rolled up the door-window then asked the lady: "where are you goin' to ma'am?".  "Oh, I am going to 46 West St. sir" she said.  "Okay, ma'am" the cab driver replied.  The lady had her face wrapped up with a blue scarf, and the taxi driver made it to the address soon.

"Thank you a lot sir" the lady said to the driver.  "Sure ma'am.  That is um, $3.50 please!" he responded.  The lady handed him money from her yellow-raincoat-pocket and got out of the cab.  The cab drove off and the lady rang the doorbell of the apartment.  She waited under her umbrella, standing in her orange rain boots and purple dress with yellow tulips on it.  Then, the door opened and a young man was in the doorway.  "REBECCA?!" he shouted at the lady and she dropped her umbrella, coming inside.  "Good evening, Roger, you ran me over and murdered me with our car two years ago, when I needed a ride home at that bus stop" Rebecca said to him, enraged.  She took her blue scarf off of her face and Roger saw that she was a ghostly-zombie.  Rebecca's face was stark-white and she didn't have eyeballs.  The ghostly-zombie's long, blonde hair blew and her stark-white skin cracked all over, causing black, oily-ooze to leak out.  Rebecca's teeth were yellow and her dead-lips peeled back as she grinned grotesquely at Roger.  Roger screamed in horror at her: "THE WOMAN I WAS SEEING NEVER KNEW ABOUT YOU AND I BROKE UP WITH HER!  GET AWAY FROM ME YOU ARE OF THE LIVING-DEAD, REBECCA!!!!!!".  The ghostly-zombie backed Roger up to a wall and he took a gulp from the bottle of Jim Beam Whiskey he held.

"I didn't know you were seeing another lady.  You're are murderous, cheating Husband Roger!!!" the living-dead lady said, shocked and infuriated.  A couple worms and roaches made their way out of Rebecca's mouth and crawled up, into her eye sockets.  The ghostly-zombie bit directly into Roger's squirming-face and as his whiskey fell to the floor, smashing the bottle, the sounds of the tearing and ripping of flesh was heard.  Roger fell face down onto the floor, dead.  Rebecca chewed and swallowed a darkened-flabby thing in the shadows, shaped like a face.  The ghostly-zombie faded-out in the hall with a laugh.

Roger had to FACE THE MUSIC when Rebecca returned eh, Kiddies?  She had gotten quite a ROTTEN ATTITUDE about the whole situation hee-hee.
A Tomb With A View

Hello once MORGUE Kiddies.  You can follow me and CREEP INTO MY CASTLE here.  I have pulled a PUTRID-PIECE out of my MORTU-SCARY!  It concerns a man who has a home built for himself, but makes a bit of a GRAVE MISTAKE, called...

It was in Texas, back in 1971, there was a lone grave by a row of trees.  A man walked over to the tombstone and looked around.  "Hm, yes, this spot will be my view" he said to himself.  A year later, the man viewed those row of trees from inside a fancy bedroom.  He stood at the huge window, smoking a cigarette.  The Temptations sang "Just My Imagination" on the radio in his bedroom and he suddenly heard something thumping in another room.  He found that the noise came from in the kitchen, and the thumping was beneath the kitchen-floor.  "What the heck is that now?" the man proclaimed, confused.  The thumping grew louder and more frantic.  "Is that a freakin' gofer??" the man yelled.

A rotten, boney-hand punched through the wooden-floor and the hole grew larger, as wood fell into the dirt.  The boney-hand was attached to a decaying-corpse of old, quivering-bones.  As the zombie shoved its skull up, through the hole in the kitchen-floor, the man screamed at the terrifying-sight.  He ran to the garage and got in his Chevy.  The zombie swayed to and from and also back and forth, as it made its way to the garage in its rags.  The skeleton's eye sockets were dirt-clogged and dropping dust out of them.  The man stsrted his car and drove out of his open-garage, down the road nearby.  As the man frantically drove and smoked his cigarette, he dropped it and gasped.  The man wrecked into a large rock suddenly.  He got out of his car and there was the skeleton hobbling to him.  The zombie laughed in a dirt-clogged old man's voice and wrapped its decayed-fingers of rotted-bones around the man's neck.  It choked the man, as some worms crawled out of its old nose-hole.  "Y'all had your home  built on top of my grave sir" the zombie laughed at him, but its laughter became more angry.  The man's eyes widened and he was murdered.  That evening, the zombie laid in the man's bed and gazed out the huge window.  "Now this is certainly a tomb with a view" the skeleton cackled.

It looks like that house has a brand new HOMEGROANER who helped the man SLAY OFF HIS MORGUE-GAGE aha-ha-ha-ha-ha!  When the old zombie arrived in the home, he was really covering the GROUND-HORROR ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!