Chapter 96: I Felt Guilty

**I Felt Guilty** is the ninety-sixth Chapter of *Boku no Kokoro no Yabai Yatsu*.

## Summary

At the film shoot site, Sanae comments on how pretty the landscape is, but Anna misunderstands, thinking she is talking about her. She gets flustered when she is corrected. Kataoka Ken arrives, making Anna nervous, but she is reassured by Suwa. She sends a text to Ichikawa saying they're about to start filming. He initially types "good luck," but switches it out with "It'll be okay" at the last second. She looks at his text with relief on her face, and dashes over to the workers to begin.

Ichikawa wonders if what he said is irresponsible, but decides to look over Anna's Instagram account to support her and save some pictures. He looks over her latest post, but instantly realizes that it's from when she was leaving his house, based off the umbrella stand next to his door. He immediately begins fretting over this, and looks over the comments, afraid of what people may say. At first he thinks everything is clear, but then he finds an account named "pigman\*1209" that comments "This isn't where you usually takes pics... could it be your boyfriend's place?" He laments on how there are such sharp guys out in the world, then starts going through the account, realizing that the same person has replied similarly about her wearing the bracelet he got her, and on her dressing up for their Christmas Eve outing. As he continues to look, he wonders if the account is a fan or a hater. He eventually realizes the same person has a Twitter account with the same name, and begins believing the person may be unhinged when they begin obsessing over getting the same seat as Anna at a ramen place, among various other weird posts. When the account refers to her as "the hope in my life," he becomes introspective, thinking about her in the same way for himself. At that moment, his sister comes in with a picture of the three of them, asking if she can brag to others about her, and he immediately yells at her to delete it and to microwave her phone to destroy the evidence. He thinks over what the kids said at their outing and concludes that the world would imagine things that aren't good if this got out.

Back at the shoot, Anna is acting out an emotional scene where she tells off her character's father. She gets too far into it and begins crying, and has to apologize for messing up the take, but she instead gets praised by Kataoka Ken for her performance. He asks if she is from Tecchan's group, that being the president of Anna's agency, and says he's glad to have her, saying her acting was more like anxiety than anger, which gave a good impression for a teen. Another woman gets his attention, asking for a picture, and he walks off to oblige.

Later that night, Anna is back in her hotel room and talking with Ichikawa. She brags about how he complimented her, and talks about how she got a tour of the set. He tells her that she was complimented for being amazing, which she laughs off. She says she was able to tap into that frustration and anxiety by looking into his heart, and is happy that she got to spend the night at his place to understand that side of him, even if she got scolded for it. He thanks her, but she counters saying that is her line as her mother comes in, knocking. As she talks about potentially working with Kataoka again, he considers how nothing is meaningless, even their forbidden sleepover or his own anxiety.

Three days later, Ichikawa is looking at the news, and stumbles upon an article about Kataoka Ken being caught in a sex scandal where the contents of his "little black book" full of 28 mistresses has been displayed for the world to see. His quote in the article is simply "I love them all." Ichikawa reacts with rage at the actor for being such a slimeball, but considers how he already knew show-business worked that way. At the table, his mother and sister are gossiping about the scandal, and he considers how Yamada may be in shock since she just posted a picture of them working together on Instagram. He decides to pull it up again out of curiosity, and sees another comment by the @pig\_man1209 account, asking if Yamada got "eaten up" by Kataoka Ken. He reacts with anger, saying she wasn't eaten up repeatedly in his head.

## Trivia

One of the listed tweets by the @pig\_man1209 account mentions being ignored by a cab, which Niko Kouda referenced as something that happened to her in her debut chapter.