Wendy's 2 with Jacob Wysocki

"Wendy's 2 with Jacob Wysocki" is Episode 294 of *Doughboys*, hosted by Mike Mitchell and Nick Wiger. "Wendy's 2 with Jacob Wysocki" was released on April 1, 2021.

## Synopsis

Jacob Wysocki (*I Don't Want To Talk About Fight Club Anymore*) joins the 'boys to discuss yoga, video games, and Wendy's. Plus, a Diet Coke edition of Jingle All The Whey.

## Nick's intro

In November of 1969, just as the Swinging '60s were set to transition to the Swingers '70s, a burger shop opened in Columbus, Ohio, founded by a buttoned-up figure who looked wholly out of step with the sexual revolution, Dave Thomas. As horny hippies and randy suburbanites continued their collective two decade-long fuck rampage, Thomas focused on stuffing consumers' holes with something more wholesome: hamburger sandwiches.

And to showcase his concept's claim of "fresh never frozen" meat, Thomas hit on an unfamiliar form factor for his ground patties, a shape that had never before been observed in nature, an equilateral rectangle which came to be known as a "square."

Theorized by Euclid in his treatise, *The Elements*, and condemned as the "devil's diamond" of the Old Testament, the humble hamburger merchant Thomas inadvertently invented the 2-D shape and, in so doing, revolutionized geometry.

By the mid-'70s, mathematics textbooks included the concept of the square root of numbers, chessboards were re-designed to be grids of squares instead of trapezoids, the now-familiar checkered tablecloth came into fashion, and youths around the country learned how to square dance.

With the 1980s came the peak of the square's relevance, as the Rubik's Cube craze consumed a nation and the Huey Lewis song "Hip To Be Square" hit the top of the charts.

And the square's relevance continues to resonate with the release of the 2021 masterpiece, *Zack Snyder's Justice League*; though pedants will insist the film's 4:3 frame is not technically a square.

Dave Thomas died a virgin, never having shot a single load. But by never cumming in, on, or even near anyone, Thomas was able to do something even more important: create a fast-food burger that stood the test of time and in so doing, invent a new shape.

This week on *Doughboys*, we return once again to Wendy's.

(And April Fool's.)

## Fork rating

Wendy's surprisingly has only been reviewed one official time, and that was way back in 2016, when The Doughboys gave it 5 forks and it made the Platinum Plate Club. They did look at Wendy's Breakfast menu in 2020, though that aspect of Wendy's did not make the Platinum Plate Club (or even the Golden Plate Club).

Of course, Wendy's Spicy Chicken Sandwich progressed all the way through the 2017 Tournament of Chompions: Chicken Fight, eventually being named the Chompion. Then, in the just-completed 2021 Tournament of Chompions: Pie Noon, Wendy's Frosty lost early in the play-in Shake-off battle.

The Doughboys have also done Wendy's-focused *Doubles* on the Fresh Mozzarella Chicken Sandwich, Bacon Queso line, and Bacon Maple Chicken Sandwich.

* Jalapeño Popper Salad
	+ no chicken
	+ no bacon
	+ add avocado
* Cheese Baked Potato
* Apple Bites
* Vanilla Frosty
 Mike Mitchell
* Strawberry Lemonade
* Spicy Jalapeño Popper Chicken Sandwich
* Classic Chicken Sandwich
* Baconator
* small Chili
* French Fries
* 6 Pc. Spicy Chicken Nuggets
* Apple Pecan Salad
 Jacob Wysocki
* Pretzel Bacon Pub Cheeseburger
* Spicy Jalapeño Popper Chicken Sandwich
* Chili & Cheese Baked Potato
* French Fries
* small Classic Chocolate Frosty
* Jr. Cheeseburger
* Jr. Cheeseburger Deluxe
* 6 Pc. Spicy Chicken Nuggets
* Chocolate Chunk Cookie
* Honey Butter Chicken Biscuit
* Bacon, Egg & Swiss Croissant
* Seasoned Potatoes
* Tropical Berry Lemonade
* Spicy Chicken Sandwich
* Son of Baconator
* French Fries
* Frosty

Jacob made numerous trips to Wendy's for the show.

Thus, with these scores, Wendy's has been downgraded from the Platinum Plate Club to the Golden Plate Club.

## Jingle All The Whey 🎶

In this segment, Nick plays a fast-food jingle is played and Mitch and the guests guess which year it came out.

The closest guess, without going over, wins that question. If you guess it exactly, you get two points.

Today's theme is Diet Coke commercials.

 jingle #2 | 1987
 jingle #3 | 1990
 jingle #4 | 1995

Jacob wins!

## Quotes

**Nick**: Better put on a raincoat.

## #hashtags

* #IAmAFreak
* #HomeRun....HomeFun

## Photos

Jalapeño Popper SaladCheese Baked PotatoApple BitesTropical Berry LemonadeVanilla FrostyBaconatorApple Pecan SaladClassic Chicken SandwichSpicy Chicken NuggetsFrench FriesChili