Food Battle 2014 Announcement

*"Oh my gosh! It's October. Where's the food battle? SHUT UP!"*
-Shut Up! Opening

**Food Battle 2014 Announcement** is an irregular Smosh video, uploaded on September 30th, 2014.

The release date for Food Battle 2014 is slated for November 21st, 2014

## Campaign Videos

### Dragon Fruit:

*I told you, "Don't embrrass me!" I told you you were never cool!*
*I told you not to drop me off in front of the flipping school!*
*I told you I'm never cleaning my room, stop crying like a bitch 'cause you're sad!*
*I don't care what the birth records say, you'll never be my dad!*

*(Never be my dad)*
*No matter how many ponies you gonna try and buy me!*
*(Never be my dad)*
*I don't care if you get One Direction at my B-Day party!*
*(Never be my dad)*
*Should have never, ever left for six hours to go to work!*
*(Never be my dad)*
'*Cause now I only see you as a stupid and a flippin' jerk!*

*Never gonna, never gonna, never gonna. No, No!*
*Never gonna, never gonna, never gonna. No, No!*
*Never gonna, never gonna, never gonna. No, No!*
*Never gonna, never gonna, never gonna. Nooo!*

### Stick of Gum:

*I'm not asking you for that much, or even that big of thing!*
*I'm not asking you to rob a bank or take an old lady's diamond ring!*
*I'm not asking you for a sandwich or even a ride across town!*
*I'm just asking you to donate your brain and your heart, or I'll die right here on the ground!*

*(Ahh, Ahh) I will die right here on the ground!*
*(Ahh, Ahh) If you don't give me your heart and brain now*
*(Ahh, Ahh) I will give up and die on the ground!*
*(Ahh, Ahh) So just give me your heart and brain now!*

*I don't see why you don't just give it to me; sure, you might not live*
*But you're my older brother, dude; it's kinda your job to give!*
*All the stuff I ever want, even if it's not realistic at all!*
*I'm just asking you to donate your brain and your heart, or I'll die right here on the ground!*

*(Ahh, Ahh) I will die right here on the ground!*
*(Ahh, Ahh) If you don't give me your heart and brain now*
*(Ahh, Ahh) I will give up and die on the ground!*
*(Ahh, Ahh) So just give me your heart and brain now!*

### Soy BBQ Rib:

*I'm a big girl in a small-ass world and it's kinda frickin' lame!*
*When I wake in the morning, I'm always crushing my bedframe!*
*Always smashing up my door jamb when I try to walk on through!*
*No matter how I try to be different, there's not much I can do!*

*But then I met you! (Woo!)*
*He said saucy girls are cute! (Woo!)*
*He said bold girls are pretty!*
*And I fell in love with you! (Woo!)*

*But then I met you! (Woo!)*
*He said saucy girls are cute! (Woo!)*
*He said bold girls are pretty!*
*And I fell in love with you! (Woo!)*

*Now I'm a big girl in a normal-ass world, and it's kinda frickin' great!*
*My bedframe's doing fine now that it doesn't have to break.*
*No more smashin' up my door jamb when my true's coming through.*
*Pink Donut you're my lovin' man, and I'm the only one for you!*

*Pink Donut you're my lovin' man, and I'm the only one for you!*
*I'm the one for you!*
*I'm the one for you!*
*I'm the one for you!*

### Jawbreaker:

*I'll break your head, son, your jaw is gonna pop!*
*Once you start sucking me, you just cant stop!*
*My ball gets in your mouth, you starts to sweat!*
*Swear on my momma son, best Food Battle yet!*

*I'll break your head, son, your jaw is gonna pop!*

*Once you start sucking me, you just cant stop!*
*My ball gets in your mouth, you starts to sweat!*

*Swear on my momma son, best Food Battle yet!*

*This ain't a game, son, 'cause I came to pop*
*And all the lame's done 'cause I don't stop*
*It's like my Mama said when I was her baby son*
*"You're gonna win food battle, dude, you're the chosen one"*
*Pink Donut got a frozen tongue, don't wanna battle with me*
*My balls straight weigh a ton, Oh man, you really can't see*
*I came to break the game, give shame to lames*
*At the end Pink Donut's gonna know my motherf\*\*kin' name*

*I'll break your head, son, your jaw is gonna pop!*
*Once you start sucking me, you just cant stop!*
*My ball gets in your mouth, you starts to sweat!*
*Swear on my momma son, best Food Battle yet!*

*I'll break your head, son, your jaw is gonna pop!*

*Once you start sucking me, you just cant stop!*
*My ball gets in your mouth, you starts to sweat!*

*Swear on my momma son, best Food Battle yet!*

### Vegan Cheesecake:

*He was the man of my nightmares; yet the man of my dreams!*

*(OH, OOOH, OH, OOOH)*

*Told me he'd dance with me forever, if you know what that means!*

*(OH, OOOH, OH, OOOH)*

*We entered a dance competition, at the local high school gym!*

*(OH, OOOH, OH, OOOH)*

*We were the best tango team in town, no way we couldn't win!*
*We heard the first place prize was, a trip to the land of Disney!*
*I got there early, he wasn't there!*
*I got worried, got the text he didn't care!*
*Then I saw them on the other side of the roooooooooom!*
*He chose my sister and my Disneyland dreams were...*

*(OH, OOOH, OH, OOOH)*

*He chose my sister and my D-land dreams were doooooooooomed!*

*(OH, OOOH, OH, OOOH)*

*Why my sister? Now all my dreams are dooooooooooooooooooooooooooomed!!!!!!*

### Pineapple:

*Life is better if you smile all the time!*
*Life if better if you only use words that rhyme!*
*Like "sticks" and "tricks" and "bricks" and "candle wicks"!*

*No matter what happens, just smile and twist! (Woo-hoo!)*

*I'm the happy fruit and nothing brings me down!*
*Kill all donuts when I come into your to-o-own!*
*Can't wait to kill that p\*ssy donut son of a bitch*
*And win the Food Battle and get super flippin' rich!*
*I'm the happy fruit and nothing brings me down!
Kill all donuts when I come into your to-o-own!Can't wait to kill that p\*ssy donut son of a bitch*
*And win the Food Battle and get super flippin' rich!*
*And win the Food Battle and get super flippin' rich!*
*And win the Food Battle and get super flippin' rich!*

### Bearclaw:

*Yeah, I don't care and I'm aware that this will end.*
*Sad part at the start, Pink Donut was my best friend.*
*Made me cheat on a test, I was his friend that was best.*
*Got kicked out of school and my parents were pissed.*

*(Pink Donut, screw you. Pink Donut, screw you.)*

*Yeah, I don't care and I'm aware he made me lose my job*
*By coming into where I work and acting like a slob.*
*He thought it would be fun to steal all the sticky buns.*
*And now I'm unemployed and homeless and dumb.*

*(Pink Donut, screw you. Pink Donut, screw you.)*

*Yeah, I care and aware it's time for payback.*
*Especially when he told my girl I was smoking crack.*
*What kind of BFF comes with a tale he can tattle?*
*I'm gonna beat his ass this year in Food Battle.*
*I'm gonna f\*\*k him up this year in Food Battle.*
*I'm gonna f\*\*k him deep in the ass this year in Food Battle*

*(Pink Donut, screw you. Pink Donut, screw you.)*

### Rock Candy:

*You're gonna pay, Pinky Lame for what you did to me!*
*Eat my fist you little bitch, 'cause I am Rock Candy!*
*In front of your boys; let's make some noise all around the world!*
*I'll teach you lessons, have you stressing cheating on this girl!*

*Let me show you something that might make you switch*
*Your opinion as I tell my minions that Pink Donut's a bitch!*
*We used to date, a little late, I caught him cheating on me!*
*And now I think the time has come to beat his ass and set it free!*

*You're gonna pay, Pinky Lame for what you did to me!*
*Eat my fist you little bitch, 'cause I am Rock Candy!*
*In front of your boys; let's make some noise all around the world!*
*I'll teach you lessons, have you stressing cheating on this girl!*

*Gonna pay the hard way for stepping out on me!*
*When I'm done, you're gonna pray for a close doctor to see!*
*I'm a mean-ass sparkly bitch who always gets what she wants!*
*I'm gonna skin your ass alive and dance all over your corpse!*

*You're gonna pay, Pinky Lame for what you did to me!*
*Eat my fist you little bitch, 'cause I am Rock Candy!*
*In front of your boys; let's make some noise all around the world!*
*I'll teach you lessons, have you stressing cheating on this girl!*