recursal/Fanatic-Fandom huggingface dataset:
Arin Neverbone

"No sex until you are married!"-Arin Neverbone

**Arin Neverbone** is a Ninja Sex Party character, whose appearance is similar to Arin Hanson.

## Biography

Arin Neverbone is a "great warrior" from ancient Japan. He preaches abstinence, along with his trusted companion Samurai Barry.

## Quotes

"*Danny, it's your cock that we now will be BLOCKING!*"
―Arin Neverbone[src]

"*Goddamn, you must sure love to slam!*"
―Arin Neverbone[src]

"*In the tall skyscrapers of ancient Japan/Lived two great warriors, a dude and a man/Who proclaimed "No sex until you are married!"/They were Arin Neverbone and Samurai Barry*"
―Samurai Abstinence Patrol[src]
## References

1. ↑ Ninja Sex Party (May 10, 2016). "Samurai Abstinence Patrol - NSP" Retrieved August 19, 2021 (Video).
Rock with You

**"Rock with You"** is the sixth track on Ninja Sex Party's fourth album, *Under the Covers*. It was originally performed by Michael Jackson.

## Lyrics

Girl, close your eyes

Let that rhythm get into you

Don't try to fight it

There ain't nothing that you can do

Relax your mind

Lay back and groove with mine

You gotta feel that heat

And we can ride the boogie

Share that beat of love

I'm gonna rock with you (All night)

Dance you into day (Sunlight)

I wanna rock with you (All night)

We're gonna rock the night away

Out on the floor

There ain't nobody there but us

Girl, when you dance

There's a magic that must be love

Just take it slow

'Cause we got so far to go

And when you feel that heat

Then we're gonna ride the boogie

Share that beat of love

I'm gonna rock with you (All night)

Dance you into day (Sunlight)

I wanna rock with you (All night)

We're gonna rock the night away

And when the groove is dead and gone (Yeah)

You know the love survives

So we can rock forever (Oh)

I wanna rock with you

I wanna groove with you

I wanna rock with you

I wanna groove with you

I wanna rock (All night)

With you, girl (Sunlight)

Rock with you, rock with you (All night)

Dance the night away

I wanna rock with you, yeah (All night, whoa)

Rock you into day (Sunlight)

I wanna rock with you (All night)

Rock the night away

Feel the heat, feel the beat (All night)

Rock you into day (sunlight)

I wanna rock (All night)

Rock the night away
GFY

**"GFY"** is the thirteenth track on Ninja Sex Party's sixth album, *Cool Patrol*.

## Lyrics

Ready? Here we go!

Hey

Hey, buddy

Guess what?

Got a fun message for you

Hey, dude

Listen up

This is important

And it's from you know who: me

First you take a G then an O then an F

Then you're gonna need a U and a C-K-Y-ourself (Yay!)

G-O-F-U-C-K-Y-O-U-R-S-elf

That's an awful lot of letters

Gee, I wonder what it spells

G-O-F-U-C-K-Y-O-U-R-S-elf

Wishing you and all your family some good and happy health? (No!)

Did you get the message?

Have you cracked the code?

Do you know which self you ought to fuck

And where you have to go? (That's right!)

I'm pretty sure you get it

A big, smart guy like you

The time is drawing nearer

So you know just what to do (Woohoo!)

Okay, everyone

Here we go

Are you all ready?

Let's hear it

Go fuck yourself!

Go fuck yourself.
If We Were Gay

**"If We Were Gay"** is the sixth track on Ninja Sex Party's first album, *NSFW*. Its music video was released on October 7th, 2010.

## Lyrics

You know, a lot of people come up to us and say "Hey, Danny Sexbang and Ninja Brian. You guys wear a lot of spandex and live together. Are you gay?" Pfft. I have to laugh. Hahaha! Haha! Could you imagine that? If we were gay? Could you imagine?

A newborn deer runs through a field

A rainbow shines from heaven

A child's smile lights up the room

As Brian blows a dude

A star shoots in from out space

A puppy licks its mother

A ray of sunlight through the trees

As Brian licks a sack

There would be no sadness if we were super gay

Just unicorns and magic if we were super gay

We would all be flying on a tasteful pink duvet

But mostly Brian (Whoa, whoa!)

Mostly Brian's gay

Whooooaaaa! (Brian's gay.) Whooooaaaa!

Here's a list of things that Brian likes to suck:

Dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, balls!

Dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, balls!

One! Two! Balls!

Your dick, my dick, your dick, my dick, your dick, my dick, your dick, my dick!

Your dick, your dick, your dick, your dick, balls!

My balls and dick! Dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick- Oh shit.

[Music Video Exclusive] Ah! Agh! Ugh! Oh! Ouch. Ah! Ugh! Ah! Agh! Ah! Ah! Oh... Dick... Ah... Unnecessary second poison dart...

## Music video credits

### Cast

* Dan Avidan - Danny Sexbang
* Brian Wecht - Ninja Brian
* Tracey Petrillo - Unknown role
* Shamikah Christina Martinez - Unknown role
* Mark Peterson - Unknown role
* Morgan Goldin - Unknown role
* Ruth Schwartz - Granny Sexbang
* Gay Ninjas - Tortilla, Guapo Futuristico

### Production

* Director - Jim Turner
* 1st AD - Mark Peterson
* Production assistants - Mark Goldin, David "GunShow" Cowles, Mark Peterson
* Disco lighting technician - David "GunShow" Cowles

## Trivia

* In the music video:
	+ Danny dressing up as a newborn deer would later be possibly referenced in "Danny Don't You Know", where he sings about walking like a newborn deer during childhood.
	+ Princess Tinkles appears.
	+ Ruth Schwartz, AKA Granny Sexbang, appears for the first time, her second time being "Attitude City".
	+ The Dannequin is killed in Danny's place.
	+ Danny has no victims.
	+ Ninja Brian has no living victims.
The Ninja Sex Party Very, Very, Very, Very Classy Acoustic Performance

**The Ninja Sex Party Very, Very, Very, Very Classy Acoustic Performance**, or **Very Classy Acoustic Set**, was Ninja Sex Party's 2021 virtual "tour", hosted on Moment House. The "tour" begun on May 1st, 2021, and ended on May 2nd, 2021. Jim Roach accompanied the band on acoustic guitar and backing vocals.

## Setlist

1. The Decision
2. Unicorn Wizard
3. Rocket Man
4. Heart Boner (Part II of the Boner Trilogy)
5. Everybody Wants to Rule the World
6. Wondering Tonight
7. Danny Don't You Know
8. Dinosaur Laser Fight (played by Danny and Brian only)

## Trivia

* The Dannequin appeared as a set piece during the show.
Strawberries and Cream

Cover Art for Strawberries and Cream

***Strawberries and Cream*** is the second album released by Ninja Sex Party. It was released on April 13th, 2013.

## Personnel

Ninja Sex Party

* Dan Avidan – vocals
* Brian Wecht – music, production, background vocals (tracks 7, 8 and 9)

### Crew

* David Dominguez – co-producer, recording
* Dan Castellani, Jr. – mixing
* Hans DeKline – mastering
In Your Eyes

**"In Your Eyes"** is the sixth track on Ninja Sex Party's fifth album, *Under the Covers, Vol. II*. It was originally performed by Peter Gabriel. Its music video was released on May 2nd, 2019, and features animations by Imogen Scoppie.

## Lyrics

Love, I get so lost, sometimes

Days pass and this emptiness fills my heart

When I want to run away

I drive off in my car

But whichever way I go

I come back to the place you are

All my instincts, they return

And the grand facade, so soon will burn

Without a noise, without my pride

I reach out from the inside

In your eyes

The light the heat (In your eyes)

I am complete (In your eyes)

I see the doorway (In your eyes)

To a thousand churches (In your eyes)

The resolution (In your eyes)

Of all the fruitless searches (In your eyes)

I see the light and the heat (In your eyes)

Oh, I want to be that complete (In your eyes)

I want to touch the light the heat I see (In your eyes)

Love, I don't like to see so much pain

So much wasted, and this moment keeps slipping away

I get so tired of working so hard for our survival

I look to the time with you to keep me awake and alive

And all my instincts, they return

And the grand façade, so soon will burn

Without a noise, without my pride

I reach out from the inside

Ohhh, ohhh

In your eyes

The light the heat (In your eyes)

I am complete (In your eyes)

I see the doorways (In your eyes)

To a thousand churches (In your eyes)

The resolution (In your eyes)

Of all my fruitless searches (In your eyes)

Oh, I see the light and the heat (In your eyes)

Oh, I want to be that complete (In your eyes)

The light the heat (In your eyes)

I want to touch the light the heat I see (In your eyes)

Accepting all I've done and said

I want to stand and stare again

'Til there's nothing left out

Whoa, whoa, whoa, it remains there in your eyes

Whatever comes and goes

I will hear your silent cry

I will touch this tender wall

'Til I know I'm home again

## Music Video Credits

### Production

* Animation by Imogen Scoppie
* Directed by Sean Barrett
* Additional Video Editing: Kelly Brickner Lyon

## Music Credits

### Production

* Percussion Genius: Jim Roach
* Engineer: Dave Dominguez
Shilkeryn Lore Hub

Due to the original creator removing the lore it's self, It was once passed onto me long ago whilst the creator OperationAFK went on a hiatus. I do thank you for your work and this unedgy and more palatable version is meant to honour the creator and History behind the lore and refine it for the modern version of Elysium. Once again Thank you OperationAFK

The Modern Shilkeryn Lore

The Modern Black Elements
Owner of a Lonely Heart

**"Owner of a Lonely Heart"** is the ninth track on Ninja Sex Party's seventh album, *Under the Covers, Vol. III*. It was originally performed by Yes.

## Lyrics

Move yourself

You always live your life

Never thinking of the future

Prove yourself

You are the move you make

Take a chances, win or loser

See yourself

You are the steps you take

You and you, and that's the only way

Shake, shake yourself

You are the move you make

So the story goes

Owner of a lonely heart

Owner of a lonely heart (much better than a)

Owner of a broken heart

Owner of a lonely heart

Say you don't want to chance it

You've been hurt so before

Watch it now, the eagle in the sky

How he dancing, one and only

You, lose yourself

No, not for pity's sake

There's no reason to be lonely

Be yourself

Give your free will a chance

You've got to want to succeed

Owner of a lonely heart

Owner of a lonely heart (much better than a)

Owner of a broken heart

Owner of a lonely heart

Owner of a lonely heart

After my own indecision

They confused me so (owner of a lonely heart)

My love said never question your will at all

In the end you've got to go (owner of a lonely heart)

Look before you leap

And don't you hesitate at all

Owner of a lonely heart

Owner of a lonely heart (much better than a)

Owner of a broken heart

Owner of a lonely heart

Owner of a lonely heart

Owner of a lonely heart (much better than a)

Owner of a broken heart

Owner of a lonely heart
Rocket Man

**"Rocket Man"** is the twelfth and final track of Ninja Sex Party's fifth album, *Under the Covers, Vol. II*. It was originally performed by Elton John. Its music video was released on October 19th, 2017.

## Lyrics

She packed my bags last night pre-flight

Zero hour nine AM

And I'm gonna be high as a kite by then

I miss the earth so much I miss my wife

It's lonely out in space

On such a timeless flight

And I think it's gonna be a long long time

'Till touch down brings me round again to find

I'm not the man they think I am at home

Oh no no no I'm a rocket man

Rocket man burning out his fuse up here alone

And I think it's gonna be a long long time

'Till touch down brings me round again to find

I'm not the man they think I am at home

Oh no no no I'm a rocket man

Rocket man burning out his fuse up here alone

Mars ain't the kind of place to raise your kids

In fact it's cold as hell

And there's no one there to raise them if you did

And all this science I don't understand

It's just my job five days a week

A rocket man, a rocket man

And I think it's gonna be a long long time

'Till touch down brings me round again to find

I'm not the man they think I am at home

Oh no no no I'm a rocket man

Rocket man burning out his fuse up here alone

And I think it's gonna be a long long time

'Till touch down brings me round again to find

I'm not the man they think I am at home

Oh no no no I'm a rocket man

Rocket man burning out his fuse up here alone

And I think it's gonna be a long long time

And I think it's gonna be a long long time

And I think it's gonna be a long long time

And I think it's gonna be a long long time

And I think it's gonna be a long long time

And I think it's gonna be a long long time

And I think it's gonna be a long long time

And I think it's gonna be a long long time

## Music Video Credits

### Cast

* Dan Avidan as Danny Sexbang
* Brian Wecht as Ninja Brian

### Production

* Directed by Sean Barrett
* Edited by Sean Barrett
* Produced by Gordon Yould
* Director of Photography: Gordon Yould
* 1st AC: Brooks Burgoon
* Gaffer: Dawid Rymar
* Key Grip: Chris lowery
* PA: Merrett Scott
Animated intro 1

This **animated intro** played during some Ninja Sex Party shows. It featured Danny Sexbang welcoming attendees to the show before being murdered by Ninja Brian. It has not been released publicly.

## Lyrics

Oh hey. I didn't hear you come in. My name is Danny Sexbang, and this is my best friend and roommate Ninja Brian. Together, we are Ninja Sex Party, the tastiest, sexiest band alive, oh my god. Say hi, Ninja Brian. AHHHH! Well, isn't somebody a grumpy Gus today? Anyway, as I was saying- Wait. What's wrong, loyal viewer? I see that something's bothering you. Don't worry. You and I will be having raw, savage intercourse as soon as this animated/epic little short concludes. Wait, that wasn't it? Oh, I get it. You're wondering how I survived that shocking murder. Why, nothing could be simpler. Let's play that back again in slow motion. So you see, it's really just that simple. Every time Ninja Brian has ever murdered me, it's actually been none other than the Dannequin, the Danny mannequin. Of course Ninja Brian would never hurt me. We're best friends. Ninja Brian, you knew about that Dannequin thing the whole time, right? Sweet Jesus. AHHHH!
Three Minutes of Ecstasy

**"Three Minutes of Ecstasy"** is the thirteenth track on Ninja Sex Party's first album, *NSFW*. Its music video was released on March 7th, 2012.

## Lyrics

You've been counting all the days off of your calendar for weeks now

You can't wait for Saturday cause that's the night that it all goes down

From 7:45 to 7:48 PM in particular

Cause that is when I'll give you what you need

Three minutes of ecstasy several nights a month

You just tell me, baby, if that is too much

When my stuff is in your stuff, our souls become entwined

For 180 seconds, my sex has blown your mind

Oh my god, you're so welcome.

Go ahead and call all your girlfriends and give them the details of how it went down (...unh!)

I know you can't wait to brag to all of them about how I took your ass to Wangtown

I'll get my captain's hat, put on my floaties

And we'll set sail for sexy seas, for at least

Three minutes of ecstasy! Any more and this house will burn

That's why I don't last longer, cause safety is my main concern

If you haven't finished, well, baby, that's just fine

You know that I'm here for you- Oh shit, look at the time

I have to go to the, uh... the pudding store for, uh... for pudding. Adieu...

1 one thousand, 2 one thousand

3 one thousand, 4 one thousand

5 one thousand, 6 one thousand

7 one thousand, 8 one thousand

9 one thousand, 10 one thousand

11 one thousand, 12 one thousand

13 one thousand, 14 one thousand

15 one thousand, 16 one thousand

Maybe it's starting to sink in, just how long three minutes really is. Let's skip right to the end.

179 one thousand, 180 one thousand- HU-AAAH!!!

Gah!

Three minutes of ecstasy several nights a month

But not more than four times a month, that would be ridiculous

I'm sure I've left you happy, but in case that's not enough

Here's a copy of my headshot and a drawing of my nuts

A drawing of my nuts!

A drawing of my nuts!

A drawing of my nuts!

## Music Video Credits

### Cast

* Danny Sexbang - Dan Avidan
* Ninja Brian - Brian Wecht
* Sara Kaufmann - Sarah Kauffman

### Production

* Writers - Ninja Sex Party
* Director - Jim Turner
* Editor - Jim Turner
* Special Effects - Jim Turner
* Assistant Director - Annie Quick
* Production Assistant - Ray Pagnucco

## External Links

Watch Three Minutes of Ecstasy on YouTube
Sledgehammer

**"Sledgehammer"** is the fourth track on Ninja Sex Party's seventh album, *Under the Covers, Vol. III*. It was originally performed by Peter Gabriel.

## Lyrics

Hey, you

Tell me how have you been?

You could have a steam train

If you just lay down your tracks

You could have an aeroplane flying

If you'd bring your blue sky back

All you do is call me

I'll be anything you need

You could have a big dipper

Going up and down all around the bends

You could have a bumper car bumping

This amusement never ends

I wanna be your sledgehammer

Why don't you call my name?

Oh, let me be your sledgehammer

This will be my testimony

Yeah, yeah

Show me round your fruit cage

'Cause I will be your honey bee

Open up your fruit cage

When our fruit is as sweet as can be

I wanna be your sledgehammer

Why don't you call my name?

Oh, you gotta call the sledgehammer

Put your mind at rest

I'm gonna be your sledgehammer

Let there be no doubt about it

Sledge, sledge, sledgehammer

I kicked the habit (kicked the habit, kicked the habit)

Shed my skin (shed my skin)

This is the new stuff (this is the new stuff)

I go dancing in (we go dancing in)

Oh, won't you show for me? (show for me)

And I will show for you (show for you)

Show for me (show for me)

And I will show for you

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I do mean you

Only you

You been coming through

We're gonna build that power

Build, build up that power, hey

I've been feeding the rhythm

I've been feeding the rhythm

We're gonna feel that power

Hey, build in you

Come on, come on, help me do

Come on, come on, help me do

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you

I've been feeding the rhythm

I've been feeding the rhythm

It's what we're doing, doing

All the day and night
Outro (Cream)

**"Outro (Cream)"** is the thirteenth and final track on Ninja Sex Party's second album, *Strawberries and Cream*.

## Lyrics

Well, that's it. Hold on a moment while I start having sex again. Gaah, that's nice. I hope that listening to this album gave you as much pleasure as the pleasure we took in making it just for you. Ninja Brian wishes to massage you with scented oils now. Would you like that? No? Good. There he goes. I guess this is as good a time as any to say that, just between you and me, I fucking hate that guy. Oh shit. Perhaps I shouldn't have recorded this. Well, I am off to change my name and address. Just as soon as I stop having sex. There we go. Wait, no I started again.
Puppies in Space

**"Puppies in Space"** is the eighth track on Ninja Sex Party's first album, *NSFW*. Its music video was released on October 25th, 2010, and while no longer public on the Ninja Sex Party YouTube channel, it can still be watched on director Jim Turner's Vimeo channel.

## Lyrics

Puppies in space!

Puppies in space!

Puppies in space!

They can't survive!

(Pow!)
Level Up

Level Up album artwork

***Level Up*** is the ninth album by Ninja Sex Party. It is primarily a remix album consisting of select tracks from *NSFW*, *Strawberries and Cream*, and *Attitude City*, updated with fresh vocals, instrumentals, and TWRP as the group's backing band. It was released on October 22nd, 2021.
Intro (The)

**Intro (The)** is the first track on Ninja Sex Party's eighth album, *The Prophecy*.

## Lyrics

Well met, young adventurer. Congratulations for listening to Ninja Sex Party's eighth album, The Prophecy. The ancient scrolls foretold of the day when a very attractive and extremely talented lover would record the greatest album of all time, with a much, much, much older gentleman in a mask. And that day has finally arrived. As always, we wanted to say thank you for being such great fans, and for allowing us to pursue our musical dreams. It's been more than ten years since we started writing these songs about dinosaurs, dicks, dick dinosaurs, and of course, dinosaur dicks. We hope to keep doing this for a long time to come because we love doing it, and we love the shit out of you. Normally, here's where we'd say something like, "We hope you enjoy the album," or, "Ninja Brian has penis disease," but today we don't have to. We know with absolute complete certainty that you're gonna love this one because that's what's been foreseen by...the prophecy!
Commander Meouch

Commander Meouch as seen in Africa

**Commander Meouch** is the bassist of *Tupper Ware Remix Party*.

## Appearance

His face resembles that of a lion’s complete with a mane, and his body is humanoid. He wears a black vest over a black morphsuit with blue arms, a blue stripe across his chest, and a blue loincloth. His outfit also includes armor worn on the knees, shins, shoulders, and forearms.

It was hinted in the *Guardians of the Zone* cover artwork, that Meouch was going to have a helmet. When asked about in a 2016 AMA, Meouch shared that it is for "space travel only" and that "[y]ou'll see it soon enough." On April 6, 2017, costume designer Keith Shepherd shared a close-up photograph of the finished but unreleased mask for Commander Meouch. On March 12, 2021, Meouch wore the helmet during a video performance of Daft Punk's song "Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger".

## Personality

Commander Meouch is boisterous and fun loving. He frequently banters with Doctor Sung and the audience at concerts.

## Discography

### With TWRP

#### Studio Albums

* *Together Through Time* (2018)
* *Return to Wherever* (2019)
* *Over The Top* (2020)

#### EPs

* *The Device* (2012)
* *2nite* (2015)
* *Believe In Your Dreams* (2015)
* *Guardians of the Zone* (2016)
* *Ladyworld* (2017)

#### Singles

* "Lazerhorse" (2011)
* "Only The Best" (2020)
* "Need Each Other" (2020)

#### Compilations

* *Omnibus* (2017)
* *Welcome to TWRP* (2018)
* *Lil' Shiny Tunes Vol. 1* (2020)

### Solo

* *Phobos I* (2019)
* *Phobos II* (2020)
* *Phobos IV* (2021)

### As Featured Artist

* "(You Are A) Model Human" (2016) Jogurt feat. Commander Meouch

### With Ninja Sex Party

#### Original Albums

* *Cool Patrol* (2018)
* *The Prophecy* (2020)

#### Cover Albums

* *Under the Covers* (2016)
* *Under the Covers, Vol. II* (2017)
* *Under the Covers, Vol. III* (2019)

## References

1. ↑ TWRPtube (March 12, 2021). "TWRP - (CRYING) Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger" Retrieved August 21, 2021 (Video).
Take On Me

**"Take On Me"** is the first track on Ninja Sex Party's fourth album, *Under the Covers*. It was originally performed by A-ha. Its music video was released on February 23rd, 2016.

## Lyrics

Talking away

I don't know what I'm to say

I'll say it anyway

Today's another day to find you

Shying away

I'll be coming for your love, okay?

Take on me (Take on me)

Take me on (Take on me)

I'll be gone in a day or two

So needless to say

I'm odds and ends, but I'm me

I'm stumbling away

I'm slowly learning life is okay

Say after me

"It's no better to be safe than sorry"

Take on me (Take on me)

Take me on (Take on me)

I'll be gone in a day or two

Whoa-oh

Things that you say

Is it a life or just to play

My worries away?

You're all the things I've got to remember

You're shying away

I'll be coming for you anyway

Take on me (Take on me)

Take me on (Take on me)

I'll be gone in a day

Take on me (Take on me)

Take me on (Take on me)

I'll be gone in day

## Music Video Credits

### Cast

* Dan Avidan as Danny Sexbang
* Brian Wecht as Ninja Brian
* TWRP as TWRP

### Production

* Directed by Sean Barret
* Produced by Jason Serrato
* Production Manager: Svetlana Dekic
* Director of Photography: Gordon Yould
* Prop Master: Ryan Kaercher
30 Second Seductions by Ninja Sex Party

**30 Second Seductions by Ninja Sex Party** was a series of skits created by Ninja Sex Party. The skits focused on Danny trying to quickly seduce women. The videos are no longer public on the Ninja Sex Party YouTube channel.

## Number 1

The first skit is introduced like a talk show, *Late Night Hodapp with Dan Hodapp*. Ninja Sex Party feature as the musical guests and perform Symphony in P Minor. The broadcast is then interrupted.

## Number 2

Danny is eating at a restaurant on a date with a girl. He and Brian play a song for her:

I love your soul, I love your heart

But they are not your greatest part

I should be embarrassed, I should show some restraint

But here goes nothing: I love your taint

The girl punches Danny into the air and destroys the chandelier and table.

## Number 2.5

Following from the second skit, the date, and song, continues:

Okay, this is awkward, but I'm just bearing my soul to you

I'll tap it out in morse code

Dot dot dash dash dash dot on your chode

I can show you wonders, just lower your defense

To the place I call your backboard 'cuz it's what I hit my balls against

The girls knocks Danny away again, destroying more tables.

## Number 3

Danny and Brian are teaching a workout class attended by a woman and a man. The class is going well until Brian changes the workout to include beating up Danny.

## Number 4

Danny tries to pick up a girl at a bar by cloning himself and enticing her into a threesome with himself. She refuses and Danny backs off, but the clones are annoyed.
These Nuts

***These Nuts*** is Ninja Sex Party's upcoming sixth original comedy album, and tenth studio album overall. It will be released on March 8th, 2024. The first single from the album, I Own A Car, was released on February 17th, 2023. The next single, Let's Save the Earth, which had been debuted live a year previously, was released on October 20th, 2023. The third single, Galaxy Hamster, was released on January 26th, 2024.

- On a Reddit AMA Brian says there are 15 tracks including skits (Intro, Outro and 2 mini songs)

Other potential songs for inclusion on the album are;

* Death Metal
* Galaxy Hamster
* Unnamed Part III of the Boner Trilogy
* Song with a word ending in "-eady" with the word "Ready" in parenthesis in the title
* Song with the words "You Stop" in the title
* Song with the word "Python" in the title
* Song with the word "Anthem" in the title
* Song with a word ending in "-elts" in the title
Next to You

**"Next to You"** is the fifth track on Ninja Sex Party's second album, *Strawberries and Cream*. Its music video was released on April 24th, 2012.

## Lyrics

We'd been friends for many years until I finally confessed

That I've always loved you dearly, but you were unimpressed

If I can never be your lover, I'll accept out destiny

And embrace your gift of friendship as I jack off constantly

Oh! I'll be there to lift you when you fall

With one arm around your shoulder and the other on my balls

Ooh! If you need me, you just have to call

Cause I'll be next to you, masturbating!

1, 2, 3, let's do it

Through the good times and the bad, I will do everything I can

Like if you ever need help moving, I can jerk off in the van

If your car breaks on the road, I'll grab my crank and pick you up

And we will drive away together as I lotion up my junk

Oh! It doesn't matter where our lives will lead us

I will always stand beside you, both in spirit and in penis

Ooh! Excuse me, but I have to go dry clean this

Cause I've been next to you, masturbating!

Look, I know this may seem weird, but it's not. Every friendship I've ever had has been like this. You should know that I'm not doing this for myself. It's partly for you. But most of all, I'm doing this for America.

Oh! Tell me everything that's in your heart

This is Claire, we're gonna make out - you just go ahead and start

If it escalated to boning, it means I'm listening super hard

Cause I'll be next to you... Hoo-oo!

Oh, wait! Claire brought a friend, we're gonna have a threesome

And a crowd of people's gathered to watch me bang both her and Lisa

Ooh! Once this is done, you and I are getting pizza

Cause I'll be next to you, masturbating!

Slash having a threesome with Claire. But still masturbating.

## Music Video Credits

### Cast

* Danny Sexbang - Dan Avidan
* Ninja Brian - Brian Wecht
* Girl Who Broke Danny's Heart - Julie Katz
* Roger Roger - Dan Hodapp
* Claire - Gina Trello
* Lisa - Kristina Fernandez
* Party People - Rachel Bitney Wecht
* Party People - Bill Schaumberg
* Party People - Benjamin Becker
* Zombie - Jerry Nwosuocha
* Zombie - Jess Rajs
* Zombie - Aileen Salerno
* Zombie - Rachel Bitney Wecht
* Spangles Dance Company - Marjorie Falioni
* Spangles Dance Company - Gina Trello
* Spangles Dance Company - Kristina Fernandez
* Spangles Dance Company - Alissa Alter
* Spangles Dance Company - Becca Lee
* Spangles Dance Company - Valerie Salgado
* Spangles Dance Company - Lizz Picini
* Spangles Dance Company - Julie Kotarides

### Production

* Writers - Ninja Sex Party
* Director - Jim Turner
* Assistant Director - Eric Smith
* Assistant Director - Bill Schaumberg
* Gaffer - Benjamin Becker
* Zombie Makeup Effects - Jess Rajs
* Zombie Makeup Effects - Aileen Salerno
* Stick Figure Illustrations - Ninja Brian Graphic Design Co.
First Date

**"First Date"** is the seventh track on Ninja Sex Party's sixth album, *Cool Patrol*. Its music video was released on August 10th, 2018, and was animated by Shoocharu.

## Lyrics

Hey, pretty lady, you're looking real fine

This is our first date, I'm not like other guys

I can tell that you have played it safe your whole life

So let's get naughty and break a couple rules tonight

Sneak in a movie, no one will ever know

Then run on private property and hold each other close

Beneath the moonlight, I've got a fun idea

Lean in, kiss your cheek, and gently whisper in your ear

Let's steal a car tonight

Commit a felony with me and drive until the sunrise

Let's steal a motherfucking car tonight

We're young and alive so let's commit some crimes

Hey, I like you!

I got you flowers, let's get some coffee

Look deep in my eyes and tell me 'bout your family

We can hold hands then you can watch me

Shoot cocaine into my eyes and rock a burglary

Let's steal some art tonight

What's a few Picassos when you're on a sexy date heist?

Let's steal some precious fucking art tonight

We're young and alive and crossing state lines

Or, you know, we could go a little more traditional. Go for a walk, watch a movie. Actually, there's a really nice flower exhibit at the botanical gardens. Ninja Brian was just telling me about that last week. He loved it. Wait, you know what? Fuck it!

Let's kill some guy tonight

We're holding hands and laughing while we shank him in the starlight

Let's take a motherfucking life tonight

We're young and alive which I can't say for that guy, yeah

Let's kill five guys tonight

Then share a cherry cola while we blast a savage drive-by

Let's kill ten guys tonight

You know what? First date, let's pump the brakes on the murders.

Let's kill five guys tonight

I'll take you back to your place and we'll craft a perfect alibi

Man, we had fun tonight

We're young and alive, and you can call me anytime (time)

Good first date. Wanna do it again next wee- No? Oh, alright...

## Music Credits

### Personnel

* Vocals: Dan Avidan
* Keys & Synths: Brian Wecht
* Drums: Havve Hogan
* Guitar: Lord Phobos
* Synths & Keys: Doctor Sung
* Bass: Commander Meouch
* Guitars: Jim Roach

### Production

* Written by Dan Avidan, Brian Wecht and Jim Roach
* Produced and Engineered by Jim Roach
* Additional Engineering by Eric Palmquist
* Recorded at Palmquist Studios and Santa Monica Recordings in Los Angeles, CA
* Manager: The Incomparable Brent Lilley
Smooth Talkin'

**"Smooth Talkin'"** is the eighth track on Ninja Sex Party's sixth album, *Cool Patrol*.

## Lyrics

You know, Ninja Brian, it's not enough to just be the world's most amazing lover. You also have to be a smooth talker. Well, of course I know how to talk to women! Give me a delicious groove, this is what I tell them.

Girl, I'm gonna take my flangdiddly out

And slam it in your flump (That's right)

Then without a sound I'll run my tongue

All up and down your whole spekunk (You like that?)

Then I'll flip you round and lay you down

And rub my gank up on your schmears (All over your schmears)

Your pliver will start to quiver

When I grab your stanky nooputs by the flears

(Oh!)

Open your heart and give me a taste of your florp

I'm gonna lightly stroke your flendle till you tworf

Then I will gently flick your turfles, baby

Till you scream "Oh my god, I'm gonna crumble it so hard!"

Damn... That's some smooth talkin'. Plenty more where that came from, meh...

Now it's- Oh, horns, sorry.

Here we go, baby. Now it's- Oh, wow, guitar solo too, alright.

Now it's time for me to take my tiddlybits

And mash 'em till they gub (Oh yeah)

I've got two nasty doodads

And they're begging for one moment with your schnub (Yeah, yeah)

My sackety-pack is the figgity-figgity-fack

And it's on the attack, it's gonna mack back in your coo!

We're gonna mate till we're drained like two hot schmazens

And I glaze you with my schmoo (Woohoo!)

Dinner is served and it looks like my vagoink is the main dish

So sit down and gobble my spoont or leave if you wish

To not have a nice taste of my flappy squish

Let her go, Ninja Brian. She's probably just going to think about it. Well, if you need me, I'll be in my chambers...schnubbing my own gank! Ahhuhuhuhuh!
Mugger

A **mugger** is a character in the music video for *The Decision*.

## Appearance

The mugger is a white male with brown hair and some facial hair. He is seen wearing jeans, a gray shirt, a leather jacket, a red bandanna with a pattern of black shurikens. He wields a gun.

## Biography

The mugger attempted to rob Danny Sexbang, but he was stopped by Danny and Princess Tinkles.

## References

1. ↑ Ninja Sex Party (December 14, 2009). "The Decision - NSP" Retrieved August 19, 2021 (Video).
I Just Want To (Dance)

**"I Just Want To (Dance)"** is the twelfth track on Ninja Sex Party's first album, *NSFW*. Its music video was released on October 22nd, 2009.

## Lyrics

I am the toughest fucking ninja that you've ever seen

I killed a king and changed the course of European history

But that's all in the past

I am changing fast

I'm switching up my stance

Cause I just wanna

I just wanna dance!

Look at me, I'm dancing!

Son of a bitch, I'm dancing!

Watch me go! Watch me go!

I've banged a thousand hotter girls than the hottest girl you've ever seen

I'll ninja-thrust and take you to orgasmic places you have never been

But I don't want romance

Or any dalliance

So button up your pants

Cause I just wanna

I just wanna dance!

Gotta believe I'm dancing!

Jesus the Christ, I'm dancing!

You now believe in God!

## Music video credits

### Cast

* Dan Avidan - Danny Sexbang
* Brian Wecht - Ninja Brian
* Mookie Thompson - Karate Master
* Kristen Acimovic, Regina DeCicco, Shamikah Christina Martinez, Jennifer Nieves, Claire Jane Wolterman (Candy Slice) - Danny's lovers

### Production

* Director - Jim Turner
* Producers - Ninja Sex Party, Jim Turner
* Production assistants - Mark Peterson, Morgan Goldin, Flynn Hundhausen
* Stage design - Michael Lee Nirenberg

## Trivia

* Despite being the twelfth track on its album, the music video for the song is the first in the Ninja Sex Party chronology.
* In the music video:
	+ Ninja Brian briefly shows his full face for the first time.
	+ Ninja Brian also speaks for the first (and so far, only) time, singing with Danny.
	+ Danny is shown killing six people: a training ninja, a king, three men in photographs, and another he punched off-screen.
	+ Ninja Brian has no victims.
	+ The Dannequin first appears, though not for its usual purpose of being killed in Danny's place.
	+ The dances performed by Danny are: the Lawnmower, Paint the Fence, Feed the Chickens, Slow Leap, Karate Explosion, Happy Tree, **Wall Jump**, Sad Tree, the Uncarved Block, **Soggy Muffins**, Ninja Flip, Casual Friday, **Super Spin-Flip Round-Off**, Savage Badger, and Bishop from *Aliens*.
		- Dance moves in **bold** are also performed by the Dannequin.
You Can Do Us!

**"You Can Do Us!"** is the eleventh track on Ninja Sex Party's first album, *NSFW*. Its music video was released on May 4th, 2011.

## Lyrics

I'm very glad you could join us today

At the annual Women's Appreciation Buffet

Where you'll get inspired to reach all your goals

You're gonna fight all your foo like a thousand Dave Grohls

There is just one simple key

To unleashing the goddess that we all know you can be

Just follow your heart and always believe

That one day you'll get ploughed by Ninja Brian and me

When your dreams are slipping through your fingers

You need to get double teamed by ninjas

You're a smokin' hot chick, so grab life by the dick

You can do us! You can do us!

Take control of your life, now be your own boss

The world is your oyster, I've got the cocktail sauce (jizz!)

Get ready to cream in the jeans of your dreams

You can do us! You can do us!

Here's some of the sensual sounds you may hear during our motivational program: Ah! Heh! Ah! Huh! Huh, huh, huh! Oh! Oy, ah! Heh! I'm sorry.

It's time to go for the gold, there should be no doubt

Except for you, Roger, would you please leave now?

Now, girls, form a line in order of height

Goddammit, Roger, what did I just say?

Now I'll put on my blindfold and my sex hat

Maybe you are starting to suspect that

I'm already hard, now reach for the stars

You can do us! You can do us!

Let's go!

## Music Video Credits

### Cast

* Danny Sexbang - Dan Avidan
* Ninja Brian - Brian Wecht
* Untitled Role - Caitlin Brodnick
* Untitled Role - Erin Goodwin
* Untitled Role - Lexi Harrington
* Untitled Role - Dan Hodapp
* Untitled Role - Jessica Hwang
* Untitled Role - Julie Katz
* Untitled Role - Rachel Bitney Wecht
* Untitled Role - Ashley Wilson

### Production

* Writers - Ninja Sex Party
* Producers - Ninja Sex Party
* Director - Jim Turner
* Assistant Director - Mark Peterson
* Gaffer - Rich Samalot
Misunderstanding

**"Misunderstanding"** is the fifth track on Ninja Sex Party's fourth album, *Under the Covers*. It was originally performed by Genesis.

## Lyrics

One, two, three, four...

There must be some misunderstanding

There must be some kind of mistake

I waited in the rain for hours

You were late

Now it's not like me to say the right thing

But you could've called to let me know

I checked your number twice, don't understand it

So I went home

Well, I've been waiting for this weekend

I thought that maybe we could see a show

Never dreamed I'd have this feeling

Oh, but seeing you is believing

That's why I don't know why

You didn't show up that night

There must be some misunderstanding

There must be some kind of mistake

I was waiting in the rain for hours

You were late

Since then I've been running around trying to find you

I went to the places that we always go

I rang your house but got no answer

Jumped in my car, I went round there

Still don't believe it

He was just leaving

Oh, there must be some misunderstanding

There must be some kind of mistake

There must be some misunderstanding

There must be some kind of mistake

There must be, there must be, oh

Misunderstanding

There must be, there must be, oh

Misunderstanding

There must be, there must be, oh

Misunderstanding

There must be, there must be, oh

Misunderstanding

There must be, there must be, oh

Misunderstanding

There must be, there must be, oh

Misunderstanding
The Ultimate Sandwich (sandwich)

The Ultimate Sandwich being measured

**The Ultimate Sandwich** is a sandwich that is so ultimate that it is a fact that no man has ever eaten the whole thing and survived. In The Ultimate Sandwich, the sandwich loses to Banana Girl in a boxing match.

## Ingredients

* Wheat bread made from thirty thousand separate grains
* A shit-ton of chicken
* A dickload of ham (weapons-grade)
* An explosion of clams
* Yams (topped)
* 1 cup Panther meat
* 2 cups Bear meat
* 3/4 cup Duck meat
* Sun-dried tomatoes
* Man's hottest pepper
* The world's coldest cuts
* Bacon

## Description

The ultimate sandwich is five feet high and three feet wide, it is also as dense as an anvil and as big as a raft.
Roger Rogerson

**Roger Rogerson** is a recurring Ninja Sex Party character.

## Biography

Roger attempted to have sex with NSP during the Annual Women's Appreciation Buffet.

Roger is a referee in boxing matches.

Roger was one once beat up by two muggers and Brian.

## References

1. ↑ "You Can Do Us!"
2. ↑ "The Ultimate Sandwich!"
3. ↑ "Unicorn Wizard"
Dick Figures: The Movie: The Song

2:53 (music video)

April 3rd, 2014 (music video)

**Dick Figures: The Movie: The Song** is a song performed by Ninja Sex Party for the movie *Dick Figures: The Movie*. The music video was released on April 3rd, 2014, on MondoMedia's YouTube channel.

## Lyrics

This band rules!

What?

Ninja Brian, are you ready? Righteous! I, Danny Sexbang, am also ready. Let's rock these dicks.

Oh my fucking god

That shit was totally amazing

Your brain cannot even comprehend

So much pants-shitting excitement

For the sake of your couch I hope you're wearing Depends

We learned so many things together

Japan is weird and French people are mimes

This film had tense scenes of action

And everyone together said "Fuck" twenty one times (Yeah!)

Dick Figures, Dick Figures

You just watched a whole fucking movie of

Dick Figures, Dick Figures

Bow before them and renounce your previous god

Dick Figures, Dick Figures

Someone get a doctor 'cuz this movie's fuckin' totally sick

You asked and they delivered

If you don't like Dick Figures, it's not hard to figure out you're a dick

I counted ten fucking explosions

A jetpack team and ninjas that rocked your face

Your life was a hot pile of garbage

Now you're so excited that you're nutting all over the place

One of those explosions was an octopus

Sorry for the spoiler, but it's your fault

That'll teach you to listen to the soundtrack

Before you watch the movie (I mean for god's sake, who the fuck does that, you stupid piece of-)

Dick Figures, Dick Figures

They saved the world, what do you think about that?

Dick Figures, Dick Figures

And you just watched them, you're so lazy and fat

Dick Figures, Dick Figures

You love them with all of your stupid heart and also part of your chode

You asked and they delivered

A movie so great it made your junk explode

Oops, our bad

Sorry about your junk

Just kidding

Fuck you

Dick Figures
Mansion Party

**"Mansion Party"** is the fourteenth track on Ninja Sex Party's sixth album, *Cool Patrol*. Its music video was released on September 6th, 2019, and was animated by Shoocharu.

## Lyrics

Ay yo, girl. You wanna come to a party at my house tonight? Everyone who's anyone in LA is gonna be there. I'm extremely rich.

Hey, girl, welcome to my house party

It's a giant mansion, baby

Don't slip on all my money

Yeah, there's a lot of models

And some supermodels too

Don't touch my diamond fridge

It cost more than the country of Peru

Seduction is like a game of chess. And I'm the queen. Wait.

Can't stop, won't stop dancing deep into the night

It's a mansion party

Yo, that tiger's super tight

And if you're feeling naughty

We'll snort champagne by candlelight

It's a mansion party

And later on's a panda fight

You've really gotta agitate the pandas to get them engaged in combat. They're very docile by nature. I laced their bamboo.

Hey, girl, heard you couldn't find the dance floor

Just walk right past the garden

Go through the Spanish French doors

Turn right at the seventh bathroom

Then a left at my laser car

You can ride my purebred stallion

If you hit my moat, you've gone too far (You've gone too far)

Take an upside down left at the M. C. Escher stairs.

Okay, you're almost halfway there

Can't stop, won't stop dancing deep into the night

It's a mansion party

I bought a yacht just for tonight

And if you're feeling naughty

We'll smoke champagne by candlelight

It's a mansion party

Now let's watch two pandas fight

(Woohoohoo)

(Woohoohoo)

(Woohoohoohoohoo)

My god! The battle pandas have escaped from the Panda-Gon and are murdering all the guests! Aw, it's last week all over again! Let's get the hell out of here!

Can't stop, won't stop nonstop running for my life

It's a mansion party

I pray to God we all survive

And if you're feeling saucy

We'll grab some spears by candlelight

It's a mansion party

We're dropping pandas left and right

Save yourself! Ah! This party's awesome!

## Music Video Credits

### Production

* Animated by Simon Macko
* House Shot by Renee Violet

## Music Credits

### Personnel

* Vocals: Dan Avidan
* Keys & Synths: Brian Wecht
* Drums: Havve Hogan
* Guitar: Lord Phobos
* Synths & Keys: Doctor Sung
* Bass: Commander Meouch
* Guitars: Jim Roach

### Production

* Written by Dan Avidan, Brian Wecht, and Jim Roach
* Produced and Engineered by Jim Roach
* Additional Engineering by Eric Palmquist
* Recorded at Palmquist Studios and Santa Monica Recordings in Los Angeles, CA
* Mixed by Thom Flowers
* Mastered by Randy Merrill at Sterling Sound, NYC
Do Math with U

**Do Math with U** is the tenth track on Ninja Sex Party's eighth album, *The Prophecy*.

## Lyrics

Hello, my love

I've been away so long

Let me pour you some champagne

Roses plus lingerie

Equals the unit I use to measure

Your ultimate pleasure (Damn)

So lay back, close your eyes

And relax while I

Pull out my calculator

And give you what you like

I wanna do math with you

And if my number two pencil ain't wrong

You've multiplied my length by width

And our division's been too long

Now I wanna do math with you

Finally, we're here alone

I just can't wait to calculate

And solve for your unknowns

If our love was two trains

Traveling opposite directions at thirty miles an hour

Baby, we'd still feel the same

I guess it must be fate

Your protractor skills are bliss

Now give my sweet ellipse a kiss

Between me and you

We've got nothin' to prove

Except a shitload of theorems

And data to review

I wanna do math with you

Your curvature turns me on

Baby, make me show my work

And I'll fill out your Scantron

I wanna do math with you

With sensuality and trust

Calcul-me and calcul-you

Girl, that makes calcul-us (I wanna do math with you)

(Do math with you)

You know, they said it would never work between us

We're from completely different worlds

Me, an applied mathematician

And you, a theoretical physicist with a master's degree in applied mathematics

But I've been crunching the numbers of our romance

And it seems we're uniformly converging to the same limit of real, infinite love

Also, you fuck good

I wanna do math with you

Integrate nice and slow

Let's bust out all your graph paper

And let the magic flow

I wanna do math with you

I'll love you 'til the end of pi

Like three point one, four, one, five, nine

Two, six, five, three, five, eight, nine

(Do math with you)

Seven, nine, three, two

Three, eight, four, six, two, six, four, three, three, eight, three

Two, seven, nine, five-oh-two, eight, eight, four

One, nine, seven, one, six, nine, three, three, nine

(Do math with you)

Nine, three, se-seven

Zero, one, five

Eight, two, zero, nine, seven, four
Shredded Metal

**"Shredded Metal"** is the tenth track on Ninja Sex Party's second album, *Strawberries and Cream*.

## Lyrics

So for the past three and a half years, Ninja Brian and I have been working on the most intense metal song of all time. It's finally ready, so prepare your body for this shit. Go, Ninja Brian!

**Ninja Brian plays goofy music**

That's- That's not it. No, that's not-

**The music stops**

Oh, you took some liberties? That- That's not metal. Play it right, please.

**Ninja Brian plays the same goofy tune in a different pitch**

That's the same- That's the same so- It's just-

**The music stops**

It's just the underwater effect on the same song. Come on, man.

**Ninja Brian plays the tune in yet another pitch**

Brian, I know you love bloopy reggae jams. Now is not the time.

**The music stops**

Could you please play the actual metal song that we worked on for three and a half years?

**Ninja Brian begins playing metal**

Yes! Whah!

Back when Satan ruled the la-

**Ninja Brian begins playing the goofy tune again**

Goddammit!