Dennis Sparks

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## Overview

Dennis Sparks is a main character in The Story, introduced near the beginning of Season 3. He is a rather cliché pervert type of character, enjoying women to a rather gross degree and finding delight in dirty sayings and innuendos. Much like Sarah, he became a large presence shortly after his debut and even gave Zack a run for his money with all the chaos he caused. He then mysteriously disappeared several chapters later, vanishing without a trace until he reappeared later in the Season like nothing ever happened and remained as part of the main cast until the very end. He wields a peculiar item known as a Starbolt and is believed to have come from a distant planet, the latter of which is unconfirmed.

## Personality

Dennis is your friendly neighborhood pervert. He loves anything and everything related to good ol' #69 and is always around when something can be misconstrued, making sure to point it out. Whenever something that can be considered dirty is said, he pops up from seemingly nowhere and shouts "BWOWN, CHHK" which is his signature catchphrase. Despite how immature he can be, he is actually very charming and knows how to be romantic. When he first debuted in Season 3, he claimed himself to be a supervillain and went on and on about world domination. Whenever he would actually try to do anything sinister, it would fail horribly and leave him defeated by his own hand. He eventually dropped this trait in later Seasons, leaving him as just a quirky pervert type of character.

## Physical Description

Dennis is a young man of average height and build, most notable for having long brown hair. His outfit consists of a sky-blue t-shirt with purple hems, blue shorts, and black shoes. The Starbolt item he often has with him is a bright yellow star with a red dot in the center and tendrils flowing from its five tips.

Seeing as he has not received any artwork, he does not yet have a redesign.

## History

### *Conception*

Dennis was based off of a friend from high school of the same name. I can't entirely recall all the specifics, but I'm pretty sure it all started when we were in a math class together and sat in the back of the room talking. When the topic of my novel came up, he said he wanted to be a part of it and I was more than happy to include him. The real Dennis was always making dirty jokes and laughing about similar things which is where he acquired his role. The Starbolt also came from his ideas and he described it as going "BZZZZTANDTHEBIGVILLAIN" which I never really understood, but was happy to add regardless.

### *In the novel*

Dennis first debuted at the beginning of Season 3 where he made several brief appearances only to disappear a moment later. While his first appearance was as a poptart cat during *Attack of the Taser Lady,* his official debut was during *Role Twister: One Bizarre Character*. From that moment on, he joined the main cast on their adventures. Partway into to the Season though, he completely disappeared without a trace and stopped appearing in chapters. In the rewrite, he's occasionally mentioned but Nathan says his appearances here are "not canon" because he's "dead to them". Obviously, this is just poking a bit of fun at his disappearance in the original print, though it's unclear why he vanished in the first place. My guess is that, after the class we had together ended, we couldn't talk as much and he was unable to tell me what he wanted to do in each chapter, so I just stopped putting him into the novel altogether. We did eventually have another class together later in the year which is why he returned in *Starbolt IV: The Return of Dennis Sparks.* After that, he remained in the novel until the very end regardless if we had a class together or not.

As far as noteworthy stuff over the years goes, he was a perverted menace for most of Season 3 barring the large gap where he disappeared. When he finally returned, things were normal until he started randomly shouting "I'mma eat yo babies" towards the end of Season 3. This would often alarm or frighten the other characters. Sometimes he would change it up a bit, claiming he'd either make fried chicken or chocolate cake out of these unknown babies instead of just simply eating them. The meaning behind this cryptic phrase is unknown, but thankfully it was dropped when Season 4 started. It was also around this time that he started creating new forms of weaponry that could be used in tandem with his Starbolt.

### *Lore*

As far as in-universe lore goes, not much is known about Dennis or his Starbolt, but it's been hinted that he actually comes from space. A place known as "Starboltia Resort" has been referenced a few times, though this location has never been seen and might not even exist. Interestingly, Dennis was mentioned a few times long before his official debut, indicating he might have been working behind the scenes the entire time. During an episode of *Viewer Mail* in Season 1, FlamDawg received a letter from someone known as "DENNISSSSS" who asked all about Zack. This means Dennis was likely trying to figure out how to counter Zack from the very beginning. Though this was before Zack started Hacking, it might explain why Dennis is impervious to any and all Zinventions that Zack creates. The following year, during *The Secrets of Fleemee* in Season 2, Fleemee mentions that he was waiting for the "cosmic, star-bearing one". This is an obvious reference to Dennis and explains why Fleemee attacked him during the events of *Coffee Toes*.

## Weaponry

Dennis wields a peculiar item known as a Starbolt. It is a simple floating star with a red dot in the center and tendrils flowing from its five tips. He describes the red dot as the "big villain" and uses this item to cause chaos... presumably. We've never actually seen him cause trouble with it, but it floats by his side wherever he goes.

Here's what we've learned about the Starbolt:

* It likely has electrical powers, hence the flowing tendrils.
* It can be upgraded and has been done so several times by Dennis unlocking its power (somehow).
* It can be used to slow down time. [*The Random Chapter*]
* It is so immensely powerful that a single fragment can be used to obliterate half of the planet. [*Lost in the Fog*]
* It can be broken and breaks quite easily.
* There is more than one Starbolt, proven whenever Dennis accidentally breaks it and then pulls out another.
* It is bound to Dennis in some way and he hints that he cannot get rid of it. [*Role Twister: One Bizarre Character*]
* It can talk to some extent, but often does not. [*Back From Prison*]

In addition to his signature Starbolt, we have also seen him create a few new weapons, though none of these were used in any official capacity outside of making a brief, one-time appearance.

**Dark Taco**

* A black-shelled taco with blue tomatoes and red lettuce inside. The taco meat sparkles like diamonds with an opalescent sheen and is believed to be the source of the weapon's power. No one knows where these uniquely-colored fillings came from, but it's likely Dennis picked them up in space somewhere. While seemingly harmless, the Dark Taco is actually a powerful weapon capable of firing intense lasers from either end of the shell. It also nullifies nagging by instantly obliterating anyone who is currently nagging within a 50-foot radius.

**Crystal Fist**

* A type of gauntlet that one wears over their arm. It is made out of space diamonds as opposed to crystal like the name suggests. Often used for close-quarters combat as it makes any punch absurdly powerful. A direct hit is capable of instantly exploding opponents, making this weapon a force to be reckoned with. It also grants the wearer the strength to lift even the heaviest of objects, making it a great tool for adventuring and house cleaning.

**Lettuce Laser**

* A head of purple lettuce that has a laser blaster not-so-subtly crammed inside. When activated, the laser fires and obliterates anything unfortunate enough to be on the receiving end.

## Abilities

Dennis has shown to have some unique abilities over the Seasons, likely because he is hinted to come from space. Here's what we've seen Dennis be capable of:

* **Teleportation:** Can warp anywhere at will
	+ Seen most notably when he teleports himself and Nathan to the Land of Death in *Same Old Something*, and also when he tries to escape Sarah's wrath in *A Line Twice Crossed*.
* **Burrito Summoning:** Can summon burritos using his mind.
	+ Seen in *Back From Prison.*
* **Nyan Cat Summoning:** Can summon, tame, and raise Nyan Cats which he then rides around on.
	+ Seen in *Battle of the Sleeping FlamDawg.*
* **Ninja Abilities:** He can vanish instantly in a manner different from Teleportation and blend in with the shadows.

## Quotes

> BWOWN, CHHK!
>
> Dennis' signature catchphrase.

## Appearances

The following are all the chapters where Dennis has either made an appearance or was mentioned. This does not include times where his name was mentioned solely in the narration. After a certain point in Season 3, he disappears from the novel yet still makes random appearances here and there. These are labeled as "non-canon" and happened only to make a quick joke.

#### Season 2

* *The Secrets of Fleemee* (Implied mention)
* *Sudden Villain Sighting* (Implied appearance)
* *A Clash of Two Nutjobs* (Brief Cameo)

#### Season 3

* *Role Twister: One Bizarre Character*
* *Lost in the Fog*
* *Time Spent Outdoors*
* *The Random Chapter*
* *Moon Over Costa Rica*
* *The Random Chapter II: Plight of the Trashy Man*
* *A Trip to the Dentist*
* *The Random Meeting*
* *Ambush! Team Zacker Appears!*
* *Sarah's Time Has Come*
* *The Random Loan*
* *Floor Donut* (Not canon)
* *The Sarathon* (Mentioned)
* *Darkness on Hallow's Day* (Mentioned)
* *Girls' Day Out* (Not canon)
* *Colder Days* (Not canon)
* *Situations (Help Me Out)* [Photograph cameo]
* *Dawn of the Prinzessin* (Mentioned)
* *Eccentric People Killer* (Mentioned)
* *Starbolt IV: The Return of Dennis Sparks*
* *The Backstage Age Special*
* *BWOWN: A Degenerate's Tale*
* *I Was Surrounded By Idiots*
* *Back From Prison*
* *Tantalizing Table Talk*
* *Battle of the Sleeping FlamDawg*
* *The Battle of Princess Sarah*
* *Coffee Toes*
* *Sightline Blackout*
* *The Millipedes of Princess Sarah*
* *The Bass Mace Chase Race*
* *The Paradox of Princess Sarah*
* *Gotta Pee*
* *Eye of the Storm*
* *The Party of Princess Sarah*
* *Road Rollin' Woes*
* *Wedding Pains: The Sequel*
* *Pervert Therapy: A Dennis Short*
* *The Plot of Princess Sarah*
* *Hacking Prankster*
* *Día de la Muerte*
* *A Calm Evening of Death and Destruction*
* *The Insanity of Princess Sarah*
* *Same Old Something*
* *A Line Twice Crossed*
* *Vicious Viral Violence*
* *Convention Quest*
* *The Rainbow Run of Princess Sarah*
* *Partying in the Dark*
* *Starbolt (In Loving Memory)*
* *The Bomb of Princess Sarah*
* *The Zucket List*
* *Nail Tales*
* *Weaponized Nonsense*
* *Chewy Chocomallows*
* *The Final Chapter of Princess Sarah*
* *The End's Ending (Season 3)*
* *Bloopers of Season 3 (Season 3's Final Chapter)*

#### Season 4

* *Here We Go Again*
* *The Return of Princess Sarah*
* *A Dispute Between Women*
* *Perfect Present Panic!*
* *The Birthday Bash of Princess Sarah*
* *Pythagorean Triple*
* *Ringmasters*
* *Quaznie Kokador (*Voiceover only)
* *The Love of Princess Sarah*
* *Shopping Spree, Fun For Me*
* *Backyard Pizza*
* *Cleavage Cannon*
* *The Chapter of Princess Zara*
* *Attack of the Police*
* *The Dragon of Princess Sarah*
* *Lipgloss Loss*
* *Another: Nasty Amber Morning*
* *The Perfume of Princess Sarah*
* *I am Zack Hakton!*
* *The Depply Wedding of Princess Sarah*
* *The Flaming Cauldron of Princess Sarah*
* *This is Me*
* *The Whatever of Princess Sarah*
* *Fruit of the Zloom*
* *The Rescue Mission of Princess Sarah*
* *Nightmare on Grove Street*
* *Rock You Like a Zurricane*
* *Thankful For Thanksgiving*
* *Sudden Surge of Sindr*
* *Zack's Bad Day*
* *World of Pie*
* *Four Little Words*
* *Jingle Bombs*
* *Hacky Christmas*
* *The Story: 2013*
* *Monday-Tuesday*
* *The Gurlz of Princess Sarah*
* *When the Weather Turns Warm*
* *Against My Will: Acid Rain*
* *Against My Will: Bursting Brunette*
* *The Sixty-Nine of Princess Sarah*
* *To Love a Cactus*
* *Spiked Love*
* *That Refreshed Feeling*
* *Pencil Man Returns (To Theaters)*
* *Late Start (Brain Strain)*
* *A Smexy Kotaro Appears!*
* *The Failed Chapter of Princess Sarah*
* *Diary of a Drag Queen*
* *She Can if She Wants*
* *WTF is Sarah DOING Here?!*
* *The Birthday of Princess Nathan*
* *The End's Ending (Season 4)*

#### Season 5

* *Beginning of the End*
* *Zack Hakton Brigade*
* *Project: Dawg Replacement*
* *Return to the Stage*
* *A Play Underway*
* *ACT IV: Running Like Wolves*
* *ACT V: The Final Showdown*
* *Supermarket Sweep*
* *Little House of Horror*
* *13th Curse*
* *Holiday Pants Thief*
* *Frozen Slushball*
* *December in GreenGrove (Part I)*
* *December in GreenGrove (Part II)*
* *The Final Year: 2014*
* *The Kotaro Adventure*
* *I Came in Like a Zrecking Ball*
* *Wrecking Werewolf*
* *Ankle Antics* (Mentioned)
* *Perfect Day* (Mentioned)
* *#story* (Mentioned)
* *That One Wednesday*
* *#MCM: Mad Case of Monday*
* *#TBT: Tundra Bomb Tuesday*
* *#TBT: Throwback Thursday*
* *Go Green! (Chapter Written on 100% Recycled Paper)*
* *Another: Final(s) Chapter*
* *The Boss Game of Princess Sarah*
* *Keeping Up with The Story*
* *The Pi Day of Princess Sarah*
* *Shamrock Shuffle*
* *Hot Pants Frenzy*
* *The Spring Break Spectacular of Princess Sarah*
* *Mission at McDonald's*
* *The Ratchetness of Princess Sarah*
* *GreenGrove Starlight Fair*
* *The Starlight Fair of Princess Sarah*
* *Prom Week!*
* *The Prom of Princess Sarah*
* *Idealess*
* *99 Problems*
* *The Flight of Princess Sarah*
* *Eyes of the Wolf (Part II)*
* *Last Run Out*
* *The Spider of Princess Sarah*
* *Hallway 69*
* *The End of Princess Sarah*
* *The End*

## Trivia

* Dennis' signature catchphrase, "BWOWN, CHHK", is meant to imitate sexy music that would sometimes play in older sitcoms.
* Dennis officially debuted during *Role Twister: One Bizarre Character*, a special chapter set in a parallel universe where the characters' genders were flipped. Because of this, Dennis may very well be a parallel version of a character from the canon universe. However, this may not be the case because in *Lost in the Fog* we learn that Dennise, a woman who would clearly be his parallel counterpart, existed not in the universe of *The Story*, but rather in a different universe known as *The Novel*.
* In *The Random Chapter*, Dennis revealed that his usual hair is fake much like Zack's. When he pulled his wig off, long, flowing rainbow locks peppered with bits of stardust spilled out, putting Zack's flowing golden hair to shame. Unfortunately, this chapter was not canon and we never got to see this again.
* In *The Insanity of Princess Sarah,* he reveals that dinosaurs are his greatest weakness.
* He is completely immune to Zack's Zinventions. This allows him to come into contact or even eat them without exploding, dying, etc.
* Amber thinks his name is Devin.
* It was mentioned in *The Sarathon* that he was absent for most of Season 3 because he was busy running a pizzeria.

## Gallery

Dennis as he appears in the novel.Dennis with an upgraded Starbolt.Dennis encounters Fleemee.A sexy portrait of Dennis found in JT's room.An icon of Dennis.Dennis unveiling his long, flowing rainbow hair.Dennis recreated in Miitopia.Dennis recreated in a Picrew avatar maker.