14 ways to build social skills from home

Children naturally learn to socialize by being physically present amongst other children. But, what about when kids can't be with their peers due to illness or school closures? How can they learn social skills from home to guide them from kindergarten to college?

"Everyone can learn reading, writing, and math from home," says Jaclyn Shlisky, Psy.D., a clinical psychologist and mom of three, including a kindergartener who she homeschooled during the COVID-19 pandemic school closures. "While it's not ideal, it is doable, but social skills come naturally for kids through modeling and the experience they get when they're in a classroom setting and on a playground or interacting with other adults, like teachers."

Read on to learn the importance of teaching social skills, and how to incorporate these lessons from home when your child isn't in school.

How to Stay Busy (And Sane) While Kids Are out of School for the Coronavirus

## What Are Social Skills?

According to the American Psychological Association (APA), social skills are learned abilities for interacting appropriately in different social situations. These include things like making friends, resolving interpersonal conflicts, communication, and regulating feelings and behavior.

Around the kindergarten age, social skills become the building blocks for what kids rely on to help them navigate the world around them. These are a few of the big ones children learn in the classroom environment:

* How to deal with disappointment
* Showing emotion
* How to respond to people (other than immediate family)
* Taking turns
* Making eye contact
* Listening without interrupting
* Playing fairly
* Sharing
* Accepting winning or losing (how to be a "good sport")
* Using appropriate manners and greetings

While people are not able to do all these things in isolation, parents can try to pick up the slack of what kids are missing by engaging in targeted play at home that can be just as beneficial to their social awareness.

"Something as simple as having a virtual playdate with a classmate can teach your child so much," says Francyne Zeltser, Psy.D Williams miller a child psychologist on Long Island, New York. During a video call, kids have to make eye contact, wait their turn, and demonstrate the body language to show that they are listening. In this way, Dr. Zeltser says you can turn your day-to-day in-person and virtual interactions into teachable moments.

But, teaching can be more intentional and activity-based, too. Below are some social skills activities you can do with your kids at home. Give them a try and have some fun with it too.

* **RELATED**: Little Ways to Encourage Your Child to Speak Their Mind

## Perspective-Taking

This is an easy activity all about identifying the feelings and thoughts of others and you can do it when you are watching TV or a movie with your child, suggests Dr. Shlisky. Press pause and say to your child, "How do you think that he or she feels right now? What are they thinking?" Let your child respond and then you can also provide your own answer, "I think they feel scared because they are being chased" or "I think they feel happy because I see the rain is stopping and they can go outside."

"It's important to let your child practice identifying the thoughts and feelings of others," Dr. Shlisky adds. You can also do this while doing role play activities or acting games. You can have a puppet show and have the puppets talk to each other about their feelings and thoughts. *The Good Dinosaur*, *The Incredibles* and *Inside Out* are great film options for talking through emotions and feelings.

## Character Play

Get out a bunch of character toys, like Peppa Pig or Barbie dolls, and have them pretend to talk to each other. Maybe you have a toy kitchen and your characters can pretend to bake a cake and have a pretend birthday party together.

Use language like, "what do you say to a friend when it's their birthday?" Then listen to your child's answer and respond, "That's right, we say, happy birthday! I hope you have a great day today!"

If your child is someone who jumps to the front of the line to help blow out the candles, take this time to role play with the character toys how the birthday child feels when that happens. "Use this game as a way to work on the things you feel like your child needs a little extra help with," Dr. Shlisky Williams miller.