Episode 168 - A Kobold?!?

## Intro

**Episode description:**
Heads-up, Episode 169 will be late next week as we won't be recording episode 169 until the evening of 10/16. Should be up and edited by Thursday/Friday next week instead.

Also special love to Melissa who left us the hilarious voicemail at the end: **https://www.instagram.com/rpg\_yogi/**

**Updated description:**
Poor Clippy

**Opening Quote:**
KYLE: *"What up, Craaaaig?"*

**Player introduction:**
Sean: Hello and welcome to another episode of the tabletop champions podcast, I'm Sean your dungeon master and with me tonight we have Ben who plays Cyrus...

\*muffled laughter\*

Sean: Kallas...

Lauren: No, no, try it again.

Ben: Who?

Sean: Kallas... Keep it rolling, keep it rolling.

Ben (in Kallas' voice): Look into my eye?

Sean: Matt who plays Cyrus...

Matt: I thought it was Kallas.

Sean: Oh my god. That's my fault. Kyle who plays Cam...

Kyle (in Craig voice): Now recording!

Sean: Lauren who plays Dagna...

Lauren: The tiefling and the half-orc were in love. You can't D'Nias fact.

Matt: Aww.

Lauren: Thanks Wolfmaster!

Sean: And Stephanie, Stephanie who plays Boone...

Stephanie: Oh my god I love it!

Matt: That was good.

Stephanie: That was fantastic! Ahoy-hoy.

Sean: Hey guys, now that we got all of our, all of our puns out of the way, how's everyone doing?

## Episode Summary

This episode starts with a special opening scene.

SEAN: *Looking upon a dismal and overcast day, we see a small encampment through the encroaching fog. Small huts draped in tartans line a small riverbed and wisps of smoke from smoldering campfires blanket the area. Of these buildings, one is slightly larger and through the window we see several men and women gathered around a long table discussing something important.*

MALE VOICE*: "It's not as simple as all that. We've tried to make alliances with other nearby clans. Some have even given troops, but it's not enough. Our meager forces couldn't even hold the line against one contingent of the McKaid(sp?) army, much less one from Jildos. I fear without a miracle we'll not stand a chance. I'll word off to*—*"*

SEAN*: The makeshift pelt door is thrown open as a squat halfling enters. He wears fine purple clothing, but the warpaint drawn on his face belays any thought of nobility. He carries a bundle of some kind wrapped in a fur. "Delvin! Quick, put this on!" The halfling unwraps the fur, exposing the skull of some great stag fashioned in the form of a helm. He hands the helm to the man and begins pinning the fur to his back.*

MALE VOICE: *"Who are you? What is the meaning of this?"*

*SEAN: "N-no time to explain fully! I know your daughter. I've been off doing...things. Mainly coordinating with the barbarian tribes, an interesting folk. I've told them that you've been brought back from the dead and will lead them to a great victory. They're a very superstitious lot." The halfling finishes tying the fur to the man.*

MALE VOICE: *"I don't know what you're trying to do here young man, but now is not the time for mischief. We're in the middle of a very serious meeting."*

SEAN: *The sound of a thousand feet, man and beast alike begin to grow in the distance. The halfling looks at the man and smiles. "When you send word to Dagna of your new army, tell her Corvino sends his warmest regards."*

* Boone and Dagna have a conversation about morality and friendship. With his new kobold form, Kallas struggles to get up to the table, then to flip it in frustration. Cam does it for him.
* Kallas asks Cyrus to paint his friend Tinker Gildrop, who is missing. After resisting his evil force and painting a normal painting, Cyrus makes a connection with his good force and paints again, signing "Don't give in, great evil has befallen his friend."
* They continue sailing towards the Scarlet Coast Forest. They notice their ship is ancient, has no name, and is made of some unusual wood. They reach the forest, and decide to leave Hunk with the ship. They're looking for a druid named Jor'rell. Kallas, who has wings now, tries out flying and spies a clearing a mile ahead. They run into Kibs, who's still mad at them from when Cam said "Fuck your forest." Dagna persuades her to give them another chance, and she takes them to Jor'rell. He examines Cyrus, and says he cannot help, but recommends that he go to the Cerise Sanctuary, which is dedicated to Jazirian. To get there, they must walk off a cliff. Jor'rell also inspects Boone's face, and says that she's the chosen one of Jazirian. They also ask him for help with Brenna, and tell him about the threads that took her and Ghost Butler. Cyrus draws the creature that took Brenna, which resembles an ogre. Jor'rell says a similar thing happened to Cordata - she fell, and during her burial rites, her soul was taken. The ogre seems to be a false face for Krizakth. The druids preserve Brenna's body for the party while they go to the Cerise Sanctuary.
* Cyrus walks off the cliff, and the episode ends with the party watching him fall.

## Memorable Quotes

Sean: Ladies and gentlemen, we have the birth of Doone.
Stephanie: How long have you been waiting to say that?
Sean: I haven't, I just thought of it and it's a beautiful day.

Kyle: I walk over and I flip the table. Gotchu, buddy.

Kyle: Maybe we just need to find you two kobold friends and a trench coat.
Sean: I endorse this plan.

Jor'rell: Faith and hope go hand in hand, and I would tell you that you have more faith than you know.