McDerpellz

> "*Welcome to McDerpells! Here we have plenty of food, staff yelling for paychecks or just yelling at customers and... AAAAAA GOD NO A SPIDER!*"
> ― Cyragenesis while trying to be a tour guide.
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McDerpellzis a chain restaurant that is found all over the Derpy Dimension. It's known for its forbidden and quirky menu, which customers should never ask about, for if they do...

Nonetheless, it is still very popular all over the dimension.

## Menu

Because of the lack of a menu, customers usually order whatever comes to mind. Even if specifying to leave out any quirky add-ons, they usually will receive a rather unique version of what they ordered. Examples include asking for cherries and instead receiving spiders, as well as asking for a burger and having a blend of multiple questionable ingredients.

It should be noted that those who ask for a menu are to be put onto it, later eaten by another customer. When customers enter the restaurant, they are required to sign a legal agreement ensuring they are aware and legally bound to this rule. In the past, only one person has broken it.

## Staff

According to older files, staff are required to yell when speaking with customers. With the reason likely being that it made customers uncomfortable, this rule seems to have been dropped.

The first recorded staff member of the main restaurant, aside from the Lord himself, is Icy, otherwise known as Milkshake. The first recorded customer of the restaurant is the ruler of Thavma, Jake. The Overlord himself has served customers before (as seen in the images mostly provided in the gallery) and tends to be the one who makes the meals most quirkily.

## Incidents

### "Judgy Joodellz"

Incidents involving the forsaken menu include Judgy Joodellz's case. Witnesses include DerpyMcDerpell, the supposed culprit; Judgy Joodellz, the supposed victim; and witnesses Cyragenesis and TheMex. The victim and witnesses were at McDerpellz when the case began. Victim Judgy Joodellz requested a menu, going against the forsaken rule. In response, the supposed culprit, DerpyMcDerpell, began to chase down the victim, brandishing a knife.

The chase went on as the witnesses decided to call the police, only for the culprit to point out that he owned the police. The fighting baby militia was sent in to immobilize the victim, who fought back with their own militia. The witnesses stood by as the victim eventually brought the case to the court. One witness followed; the other did not.

The victim attempted to sue McDerpells and the culprit, only for the culprit to send in kung fu babies alongside some pandas, which was retaliated with water bottle kickers. A missile was launched; next, witness Cyragenesis commented about knowing the moves the water bottle kickers used, which both the victim and culprit agreed on it being bad that she knew. The missile landed just as the witness put on a gas mask, the culprit and victim continuing to try to bomb each other. The fight went on and eventually ended as the day itself did.

Days later, witness TheMex rose in defence of the victim, taking the position of attorney as he challenged the culprit to a duel in the name of the victim. Results of the duel are not recorded, though it is unofficially known that DerpyMcDerpell had used a magic wand to best his opponent.

It is now known that DerpyMcDerpell was correct in trying to cook the so-called victim, for she had signed a legal contract stating (this is summarized) that she would be put on the menu if she asked for it. There is also a sign in the restaurant that can be clearly seen as long as you are not blind that reads "HELLO! WELCOME TO MCDERPELLZ. NO QUIET VOICES. WE SERVE MAJESTIC FOOD. DON'T ASK FOR A MENU OR YOU WILL BECOME PART OF IT."

DerpyMcDerpell had scientists research Judgy Joodellz, finding that the judge actually was Girlygirlyrockstar and was brainwashed by an Aqualing a long time ago. Aqualings are now at peace with the Derplings; however, in the past, there was a great war called the War of Aqualings. It was part of the agreement that all hypnotized Derplings were to be relieved of their symptoms, but it seemed that Judgy Joodellz was kept by a rogue Aqualing and released after the culprit was arrested by Aquali police.

### The Menu Revealed

When Sam went to visit McDerpellz for some food, a fragment of his past personality (see the comic book mentioned in Sam's article) put him in danger again, and he asked for a menu. Immediately, several bots rushed at Sam, who fought with his signature weapon—a frying pan decorated to look like a cobra.

Unfortunately, DerpyMcDerpell had to comply with his own rules. When Sam got a knife in the back from a chef, DerpyMcDerpell casually grabbed his corpse (Sam dying has become a common event) and threw him into the cloning machine.

DerpyMcDerpell came up with a less harmful solution and hooked the cloning machine up to McDerpellz. Clones of Sam were now being shipped to McDerpellz as ingredients; however, when DerpyMcDerpell tried to fish Sam out of the cloning machine, he accidentally grabbed a clone, and Sam was almost minced to death before DerpyMcDerpell threw the clone back into the tube and grabbed the real Sam.

Sam's clones were initially made into burritos, but Samburgers became a more popular dish. Sam, disturbed by the incident, banned McDerpellz in his country, as he is a dictator and often does not consult with the Weebatronian Parliament or the general public.

As Weebatronians stormed Derp Castle, they protested for Samburgers to be banned everywhere (as well as other foods made of snakes); some even wanted McDerpellz banned everywhere. DerpyMcDerpell kept the Weebatronians protesting for so long that they became hungry, and he fed them Samburgers, causing them to switch sides, as the Samburgers were delicious. Some former protesters even wished for Sam to donate parts of his body as delicacies for the rich to be served at McDerpellz.

Sam, who was trying to find a way around the issue without taking back his request for a menu, searched relentlessly through every dictionary and thesaurus he could find in an attempt to find an antonym for the word *menu*. Eventually, before he could stop himself, he requested antimatter.

(Un)luckily for Sam, DerpyMcDerpell had no choice but to comply, and he summoned an orb of antimatter. It flew straight into Sam's mouth seconds before Sam declared that he was never meaning to eat it; however, it was too late, and he accidentally sank his teeth into it.

Sam disappeared, and DerpyMcDerpell left the restaurant as the mourning crowds of Derplings wept. He travelled through several dimensions and arrived back to visit the still-sobbing crowds. Before DerpyMcDerpell announced Sam could not be found, Sam popped out of thin air, the blinding flash scaring away the citizens.

In Sam's hand was a menu, brought from nothingness. Sam stood there, gasped, and said, "It exists!" DerpyMcDerpell stared in awe and asked to see it. Sam gave him the menu, DerpyMcDerpell scrolled through it, and Sam was in shock.

DerpyMcDerpell threw the menu into a fire and burned it.

Immediately after the menu was destroyed, a potato meteor struck nearby, and DerpyMcDerpell declared that they were the robot chefs' reinforcements; they watched as a mass of chefs exited the meteor and charged for the tube connecting the cloning machine and McDerpellz. They hoisted a clone into the air and formed a circle around it, the robotic voices shouting the word *cult* over and over again.

Sam, afraid, went into his snake form, a small baby snake, and DerpyMcDerpell covered his eyes as he watched from above in a Waffle Plane; however, Sam still had the tendency to lick people, and he licked DerpyMcDerpell's hand, causing him to shout in disgust and release Sam's eyes. Sam screamed as robots cut open his clones in a cult ritual.

DerpyMcDerpell figured a blindfold and earmuffs would be more useful than using his hands—after all, being licked isn't very fun—and quickly applied the two objects to Sam's tiny head. As a result, Sam squealed that he could not see and fell off the Waffle Plane. Sam took off his blindfold to see a knife "right in front of" his eyes and screamed.

DerpyMcDerpell picked Sam up, but Sam was dizzy and fell back down (onto a robot's head). Sam jumped from head to head, the robots stabbing themselves by accident where Sam had once been, and Sam began to cry; thus, DerpyMcDerpell threw Sam back onto the Waffle Plane.

Sam was hungry, and DerpyMcDerpell gave him a Samburger, which caused Sam to react violently. He began to attempt to chop DerpyMcDerpell up with an axe to put *him* on the menu, but DerpyMcDerpell put him in the bad boy corner.

Until 2018's end, Samburgers and other Sameals could be found at McDerpellz. They were since taken off the dreaded menu, though McDerpellz is still banned in Sam's country, Weebatronia, where protesters are found constantly protesting for the right to eat at McDerpellz; however, the government is still replacing such facilities with other restaurants.