Warriors Cats Go To Dinner (Second Book in the 'Warriors Cats Go To New York' Spoof Series')

Everyone: Yes!

Lionblaze: We should go hunting!

Dovewing: You bet!

Man Walking: Hunting season is fall, not now.

LIonblaze: What in the world is 'fall' and how to we eat if we can't hunt?

Dovewing: Maybe Twolegs only eat in the 'fall' thing?

Graystripe: Maybe Twolegs can only hunt as there falling, so they only eat when they fall!

Ivypool: Fall is a season if the year, I think it's what we call 'Leaf-Fall' and humans go places to eat, that give food.

Lionblaze: Strange...Wait how do you know that?

Ivypool: \*Hides book behind back\* I don't remember.

Dovewing: Give me that!

Dovewing: *Harry Potter* really?

Ivypool: Ummm.....

Jayfeather: Stop, where did you two all learn to read? How did Firestar learn to drive? How can we all speak and understand human? WE ARE ALL CATS!!!!!

Firestar: I don't know how to drive, I got lucky.

Hollyleaf: That's not allowed!!!!!!

Lionblazel: I *think* I know what they are saying in books as well......a 'car' is a mouse right?

Ivypool: You all never wonder where Dovewing and I go for hours a day?

Hollyleaf: I read here that we could all speak humans and as for reading maybe Dovewing me Ivypool and Lion......Wait a car is *not* a mouse!

Firestar: What's a 'human' by the way?

Hollyleaf: Where did you even come up with that....

Ivypool: A humans is what we call a twoleg it says so in many books I have read....

Dovewing: You have only read three books.

Ivypool: And they hard books to read!

Graystripe: CAN WE GET SOMETHING TO EAT ALREADY?????? PLEASE!!!!!

Firestar: How about we try that place?

Person who owns place: How many?

Firestar: 20

Person who owns place: You can't all eat together, sorry. Seven people per place.

Firestar: Okay. Can we have Lion....

Person who owns place: Did you call him 'Lion' I don't think that's a name.

Firestar: Uhhh....

Hollyleaf: That isn't his name, just what we call him. Can I and \*Points to Doveing Ivypool Lionblaze Jayfeather Firestar and Graystripe all eat at one place?

Person who owns place: We are full, and we only have one place left, the others will have to eat somewhere else.

Firestar: Sorry guys! And I guess we will meet together at moonrise?

Person who owns place: Moonrise?

Mousefur: I guess, see you later.

Person who owns place: Come sit over here, I will get someone to ask what you want.

Firestar: I can't read this...

Hollyleaf: I can!

Ivypool: \*Reads *Harry Potter*\* This is a good book!

Lionblaze: Do you have any mouse?

Person: Sorry, we don't have mice.

Jayfeather: How abotu squirrel?

Person: Ummm....no

Person: How about you all get drinks?

Dovewing: There are drinks other then water?

Person...Yes......

Graystripe: Coke!! Whatever that is...

Firestar: Coffee!!! Is is good?

Jayfeather: Fanta, and ONLY Fanta, no drink that is not fanta.

Dovewing: There is water that sparkles???? I'll have that.

Ivypool: How about a Milkshake? Don't know what that is....

Hollyleaf: Umm........... How about Water?

Lionblaze: Milk! I had no idea none-kits could eat that....

Person: Ummm...that is...uhh....okay?

Person: \*Gives them drinks\* Do you have an idea what to order?

### Chapter Two

Graystripe: Do you have any birds?

Person: Well, yeah. Look there's duck.

Graystripe: I was thinking more like a blue-jay do you have anything like that?

Person: This is New York City.

Graystripe: What do you have closest to blue-jay do you think?

Person: I guess duck.

Graystripe: Very well, duck it is.

Firestar: What sort of other jobs do they have here?

Person: I asked you about your food....

Firestar: What food do you have here?

Person: Chicken fingers are good.

Firestar: And how much might that be in money?

Person: Not much.

Firestar: That is perfect!

Hollyleaf: Umm....Same as him I guess.

Jayfeather: What in the world in a hotdog how do you catch the dog?

Person: There no real dog in it, and many of us keep dogs as pets here, as well as cats.

Jayfeather: Kittypets not really even cats....but the hotdog I guess if there is nothing else to eat.

Lionblaze: Same as him!

Dovewing: I guess I will have....You don't have mice?

Person: Putting up with strange food taste and not knowing much about drinks or the human world I can take, but no one and I mean NO ONE questions if this place has mice! Look this place has NO MICE it is clean on like many other places around here!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dovewing: Huh? I didn't mean it like that.....

Person: I will NOT bring your order to you. Whatever it was.

Graystripe: Sorry Dovewing......I will share my food with you...I guess.

Person: I will not bring food to *any* of you.

Graystripe: What??? You can't do that!

Hollyleaf: Stop just stop this makes no sense.

*Meanwhile the others have a fine dinner*

*Sort of...*

Squirrelflight: So my plan is we steal the car, and drive back to Clan without anyone knowing! But it doesn't end there. We have seen our whole Clan and all....And Brambleclaw I cannot stand.....So how about we and the other 18 of us find a new place in the human world...a much better plan....right Leafpool?.....Leafpool....Did you here that?

Leafpool: Squirrelflight I can't here my music!

*But the others are*

Ravenpaw: And here are me and Barley fighting BloodClan and almost getting killed and here is the fire....many other great things are in here...the world of images, it's a really great place you know!

Mousefur: Great!

Longtail: Amazing!

*Back to the main seven...*

Firestar: She didn't mean it like that! Where we come from we eat mice, they taste good you should try them! But she didn't want to know if the place had mice like on the place, she wanted to know if they had them to eat. You know? So what do you think?

Person: If it was anyone else, I would think it as a bad joke, but all of you, I wouldn't be surprised if you ate mice. Fine you win. But the order will be twice as much if that is okay with you all, and of not eat somewhere else what do you think?

Firestar: \*Licks Scars\* That would be perfect! We can do that! Right guys?

Everyone but Ivypool: \*Licks there scars\* Yup! We can do that!

Ivypool: \*On the ground with scars she had no idea about and has not stopped rading her book\* This book is *great* Dovewing once I am done you *have* to read these books!

Dovewing: Okay!

Person: Dovewing...if that is your name...What would you like to eat?

Dovewing: That Chicken fingers stuff sounds good any day!

Person: Okay and you *Harry Potter* reader?

Ivypool: Huh what is up? Oh food and that is hard. How about Pizza? It is meant to be great...

Person: Be back soon!

Firestar: Put the book down, it is rude to read at the dinner place you know!

Ivypool: But the book is good fine it will be put back for now.

Graystripe: Do we have a hotel to stay at?

Firestar: Umm...no but think about there must be hotels *everywhere* we eat now and find a hotel later.

Dovewing: I like the human-world a lot better then the cat-world you know. Maybe we should stay!

Hollyleaf: Maybe.

Person: Here is all of your food, pay when you wish I guess.

* Cats Eat\*

Firestar: See you, we should go now.

Person: Without paying? I don't think so!

Firestar: What? Paying? You have to *pay' okay we will pay. How much?*

Person: The price is $150

Firestar: That much?

Person: If that hadn't been that whole thing about the mouse, it would have only been $75 but the price is twice as much now.

Firestar: What? It was that much? Okay here is the money. \*Gives Money\*

Person: What? No tip?

Firestar: Tip? There are tips in New York City? Really? \*Hands over more money\*

* Warriors Cats Leave and see the others waiting for them.\*

Squirrelflight: What was dinner like for you? The dinner we had was good.

Firestar: That is  good for you. Where are we staying tonight?

Sqirrelflight: The others already found a place to spend the night.

Firestar: And you found a place for us to stay too?

Leafpool: That part is not true. We found a place for *us* to stay.

Firestar: What is the name of the place?

Leafpool: It doesn't matter, the place is full now after we found it and got a room there, you seven will have to stay somewhere else.

Firestar: But that's not fair!

Leafpool: Sorry but you took longer. Everyone, other then all of you, we should go.

Firestar: If anyone has a phone, that would be great.

Lionblaze: If that is what you need, then I have one.

Firestar: Hand it over.

Lionblaze: Here you go! \*Hand phone to Firestar\*

Firestar: There must be a way to use this thing \*Phone works\* There we go! Hello can we have a room for I don't know how many nights, how about a month? And for seven, so many seven rooms. What you only have one room left? But it has seven beds? What are beds? I have no idea what beds are, but great and we will have that room. Is it open for a month? That should be perfect! We will pay as soon as we get there for the whole month if that is what you want. Talk to you soon!

Graystripe: How did it go?

Firestar: It went fine I guess.

Lionblaze: Just as a question....do you know how to get there?

Firestar: Just to answer your question, I do know how to get there.

Hollyleaf: How do you know that?

Firestar: The way that is I know it, is that I have great powers, and I can find anything anywhere always as long as I want too!

Jayfeather: That and the fact that the hotel is right there.

Lionblaze: Now that is a good point!

Dovewing: Wait Jayfeather how do *you* know that? You can't see!

Jayfeather: That is that....ummm.....Knowing that the hotel right there was by chance, I had no idea.

Dovewing: Wait a second, what is that?

Jayfeather: That is a mailbox where people put mail and it is blue.

Dovewing: Lie that was! You are '*not* blind!

Jayfeather blind I am! To truth tell the, I have no idea why we are changing the order of where we put the words,  but works for me! And I am blind. Or rather am I blind. Truth be told, there is no reason to think I am not blind, other then the fact te fact that I can see! How about we go to tthe hotle?