Hermes (U432)

Hermes is the winged herald and messenger of the Olympian gods. In addition, he is also a divine trickster, and the god of roads, flocks, commerce, and thieves. A precocious newborn, he invented the lyre and stole Apollo’s cattle on the very first day of his life. Hermes was the only Olympian capable of crossing the border between the living and the dead.

## History

### Birth

Hermes was still born of one of Zeus' affairs, this one with a woman named Maia. He was born in a cave in Mount Cyllene in Arcadia at dawn. By noon he was able to invent the lyre and play a hymn celebrating his own birth on it. That very same evening, for reasons unknown, he stole the cattle of Apollo. Afterward, he came back and innocently tucked himself up in his cradle.

### Hermes and Apollo

To invent the lyre, Hermes killed a tortoise and scooped the flesh out of its shell. Then, honoring the Pleiades, he stretched seven strings of sheep-gut over the empty shell. Once he found out who had stolen his cattle, Apollo was so angry at Hermes that bad things might have happened if Hermes hadn’t appeased Apollo with a lyre- accompanied song. In exchange for it, Apollo forgave his little brother everything and swore to be his closest friend forevermore. Some say that as a token of this promise, Apollo gifted Hermes with the latter one’s most emblematic object: the caduceus.

### Hermes the Darling

By all accounts, Hermes was a darling of the gods. Artemis supposedly taught him how to hunt and Pan how to play the pipes. He was the one who guided Persephone back to her mother, Demeter. Above all, Hermes was very close with his father, acting in many of his affairs as Zeus’ wingman. Most famously, he beheaded the hundred-eyed giant Argus Panoptes, previously sent by Hera to closely watch over Zeus’ love interest Io.

### Hermes the Messenger

In his role as a messenger, Hermes is present in numerous other myths. He escorts Pandora to Epimetheus, leads Perseus to the Graeae, and guides Priam safely to Achilles’ tent. In addition, he showed Athena, Aphrodite, and Hera the way to Mount Ida where Paris was supposed to judge which one of them was the fairest.

### Hercules' Baby Shower

At Hercules' baby shower, Hermes was quick to rush past everyone else and bring Hera a bouquet of flowers. The gesture wasn't very moral, but was rather done just to get on her good side. It had seemed to work, as Hera appreciated the flowers and called them lovely. In his typical fashion, he made a witty remark. He said “I had Orpheus do the arrangement. Isn’t that too nutty?” The joke here was in the double use for the word “arrangement” - as in “floral arrangement” and “musical arrangement”. The joke was also complimented by the fact that Orpheus was a famous musician, and him being passed by this time. In reality, Hermes had purchased the flowers.

He then went to Zeus, making an equally sycophantic and humorous comment that he "had not seen so much love in a room since Narcissus discovered himself". He then looked at Narcissus, who was looking at his reflection in his mirror.

While the two were talking, Hercules snatched one of Zeus' pocket lightnings. Hera was nervous and advised Zeus to keep them away from the infant, but Zeus affirmed that he would not hurt himself. Nevertheless, he got zapped when he tried to bite the bolt. When Hercules was kidnapped, Hermes was one of the ones sent on the search party.

### Prometheus Academy

During training, Hercules threw a spear (which Pegasus dodged) straight into a pinpoint put up by Phil on a tree. The spear caused the tree to crash back several meters. Their training lesson was cut short when Zeus appeared and told Hercules that he should go to school and fill his head with a fountain of knowledge. Philoctetes was frightened, but accepted.

The next morning, Philoctetes was making some coffee and opening the door, Hermes rushed in. He took the newspaper The Greekly and read that the Prometheus Academy had accepted the "happening" Hercules into its school. Hermes noted that everyone on Olympus was "hyped", and made a breakfast smoothie with extra banana for both of them. Philoctetes ate the newspaper as he wasn't allowed any smoothie, and told Hercules to relax. Hermes mentioned that the school barge was waiting when he got there, and Hercules rushed with his lunch to not miss the barge.

### Hercules' Internship Week

During Hercules' internship week, Hermes held the emergency council for Hercules' job and later the vote of no confidence.

## Appearance and Personality

### Personality

Hermes is often sarcastic and wit-tongued. He is a mischievous trickster. He loves mashed pumpkin, specifically in pumpkin pie.

## Differences

* Hermes did not personally know Orpheus.

## Quotes

"I haven't seen this much love in a room since Narcissus discovered himself." - Hercules (1997)