Boris Slutcliffe

Boris is the worst fucking person on Eath, his mama is JONAH and his dad is the TOILET aka the Yorkshire Ripper (Puta Slutcliffe the Ugly Arse).

## Biography

### Birth

So once upon a time. There was a toilet. It was a very nicely built toilet. But then, JONAH JONAH JONAH JONAH JONAH JONAH JONAH JONAH JONAH JONAH JONAH JONAH JONAH JONAH JONAH JONAH JONAH JONAH took a massive cum, shit and piss in the toilet and it clogged up the toilet and it swirled like Peacho’s Peecream Fusion. And then …. Someone got pregnant. AND IT WAS JONAH. But he didn’t know.

One day, Jonah got convulsions, and then he was spinning and dancing on the toilet. And then he got period cramps. And his anus was bleeding like vagina lines. Then his penis became very huge, then it bursted to 1 million pieces and it flied and orbited spacetozie, and spacetozie declared 9 days national mourning because it was so smelly and it caused global dimming on spacetozing. . So he went to the doctors, but once he got there, he collapsed and fainted on the hospital beds. And he stayed there for the 9 month gestation period while he was in a coma and the doctors all thought JONAH was going to die. While he was in coma,Reina's runaway father and Rainboy's mother were screaming  PUSH PULL PUSH PULL at each other and twerking at JONAH'S bed, and he was having such a huge allergic reaction that he lost his brain and in flew Borisina’s brain. He had a wet dream every day for the gestation period. So Borisina's brain fused with the lost part, then some of JONAH'S cum were mixed with it, so Boris became a cum head, were his head kept cumming nonstop. Then, jonah’s intestined turned into a burnt candyfloss mess, and his ovaries were motorcycles. Finally, Jonah’s bussy spat out Borisina at 66:66am on 19 September 2019, and sadly, Jonah died in childbirth because the sight of Baby Borisina was so bad that it stank up the WHOLE HOSPITAL and started a fire that everyone needed to evacuate. It smelled like R.O. (Rozie Odour) so all the nurses  escaped from the hospital along everyone to be safe, so the R.O was spreading,  then baby Boris farted fire from his ass and the R.O exploded. Then boris flied and bashed his head to a Reina the killer statue. That was his first dumbness.

### Childhood

So his brain melted into sugary jelly and he never ever thought straight in his life ever again,his mom decided to boil him in a jelly bowl and make him shitty jello, but he exploded so she dropped him in the trash. So the very nice toilet mom also passed away and she was buried next to JONAH.. Then he was adopted by the garbage bin and Rozika from XXL. Then Rozika decided to put make up all over his face so he looked like Rozie the clown, so Rozika got mad and walked all over him with her new Shane Dawson crocodile cha cha heels, then she took him to the XXL HQ that is actually MCROZIES MACEDONIA, and it was full of Rozina Mice and it smelt like the average MTV viewer, aka Rozie’s Teen Mama CHANEL. So Boris was searching through the HQ, so he found a Mouse and he thought it was Minnie Mouse AKA FLOWERFARTS,It was full of Rozi teen moms shouting “DONUT DONUT DONUT DONUT DONUT DONUT DONUT DONUT DONUT LOOK AT ME!” Rozika was actually a squatter in MTV Macedonia, that showed the XXL videos all day. So she was deported to Azerbaijan with her garbage bin husband and Boris. In Azerbaijan, Boris watched YooHoo and Friends all day. Because that show is fucking weird just like him. And he realised he looked like father time when he looked in the mirror. Then he started singing “ SING IT AWAY,ALL MY HUMAN FEELINGS AWAY, SING IT AWAY HUH HUH \*MOANING\* SING IT AWAY SING IT AWAY SING IT AWAY”.