191: He Said "Teat"

## Summary

The party venture into Morrow's Inlet and learn about *Tomorrow, Today!* at the customs office. Exploring more of the Waterside, they encounter Marko, a Cliffsider who promises to lead them to his side of the wall, but before they can leave, Captain Clockface goes missing!

## Synopsis

The party have arrived at Morrow's Inlet. They stop at a rocky piece of shore. Raphina is interested in getting some magic paper and Will wants to see if he can send a message to Tivoli from here. Dew doesn't like the smell at all and wanders off to look for herbs, flowers or something that he can carry with him. Batthwack asks Will to make his crown invisible before the enter the town. Will offers to change everyone's appearance with his *Seeming* spell. As per requests from the party he makes Mo look like a dragonborn, gives Raphina and Captain Clockface each a beard of flowers. He also changes his own face and clothes to look more plain, i.e. a brown suit and brown hair and he casts *Prestidigitation* on his handkerchief to smell like orange blossom.

They're greeted enthusiastically by a stout dwarf at the dock who instructs them to go the customs office. A brightly coloured sign over the top of the office says *"Tomorrow, Today!"* A human woman behind a counter pops up and welcomes them *"Oh, welcome! Come in, come in, come in! Welcome to Morrow's Inlet. This is the customs office run by* Tomorrow, Today!*"* They pay their docking charges. She offers them a tour of the town. Raphina says she'd like to see the magic paper. The customs woman says *"Ah yes, Crumplemeyer's Paper Mill. It is widely known across Six Rivers"* and explains it is on the "Back Side" of town, but that all the best things to see are on the "Front Side". She refers to people from the back side as "Back-Siders". She reveals that Ricardo Ulysses recently stopped by in town and unloaded some of his wares. She recommends visiting some of the magic shops to see if their items are there. She recommends the magic shop *All That And A Bag Of Holding*. She says the "Back Side" is full of *"criminals, degenerates, scum"* and the wall is there to keep them there.

Dew is really struggling with the smell and Will casts *Prestidigitation* on him to create the smell of freshly baked bread from his childhood.

On the way out Will grabs some tourist brochures. One of them has information about a bright yellow/green fluorescent lichen found in the caves of the cliffs surrounding the town. It is also often found in the Underdark, but here it is harvested to provide a special type of cellulose used to make paper for spellbooks. The other brochure is about *Tomorrow, Today!* and how it runs most of the "Front Side" of town. A third brochure is about a self-guided tavern tour, starting at a place called *Bubbly Libations*.

They head further into the town and Will is looking around at the shops. He's impressed, though he senses the shops all have a somewhat stiff and regulated image. He sees a clothes shop called *Threaded Stock*. Raphina says she wants to find a child to show them about town, which causes Hilula to clutch at Dew in fear. However there aren't many children around because the evening is drawing on, so Raphina suggests they bed down for the night.

They suddenly hear a commotion a couple of streets away. Other bystanders don't seem to pay much attention to it. Dew wants to check it out because they don't want to be going to bed in the middle of a riot. On their way they pass a furniture shop called *The Piner Things* and they also see the magic shop *All That And A Bag Of Holding*. Outside an establishment called *Roladexaroonie* they see a crowd of about 15 people gathered round, shouting and jeering at a man dressed in a grey-brown jumpsuit lying on the floor. Batthwack leads the man out of the crowd, who are intimidated by him and don't resist. One member of the crowd confronts Batthwack telling him they're not happy that the "Back-Sider" was in their dancehall.

The crowd disperses back into *Roladexaroonie* and the party talk to the man who reveals he is a "Back-Sider" named Marko, though he explains that the townsfolk living behind the wall call themselves "Cliffsiders" and the others as "Watersiders". He says he works at the paper mill and is proud of it. He suggests they should come to the other side of the wall, *"with the civilised folk."* Will asks the man why he was on this side of the wall and he says he'll tell them if they accompany him to the inn. Will asks him about *Tomorrow, Today!* and he says they are *"a group of price gougers and extortionists that exist solely to both feed off the teat of Crumplemeyer's paper mill and make it very hard for us to do our work creating the goods that bring the wealth and fortune to Morrow's Inlet."* He says *"Every drop of water we pay and pay dearly for."* There are a series of underground sluices manned by *Tomorrow, Today!* thugs who control the supply.

Marko leads them down the side of *Roladexaroonie* to the back where there is a small window. He starts to stack crates underneath in order to climb up. Batthwack climbs up to the window and starts to help people in, when the group suddenly realise that Captain Clockface is missing.

## Trivia

* The episode title is a quote from Abby. The group are talking to cliffsider Marko about *Tomorrow, Today!* and he describes them as *"a group of price gougers and extortionists that exist solely to both feed off the teat of Crumplemeyer's paper mill and make it very hard for us to do our work creating the goods that bring the wealth and fortune to Morrow's Inlet."* There's an uncomfortable pause before Abby says, *"He said 'teat',"* and someone sniggers.