Anything Lana Can Do

This is a parody of "Anything You Can Do" from *Annie, Get Your Gun.*

## Lyrics

**Lola:** Anything you can do, I can do better.

I can do anything better than you!

**Lana:** No, you can't!

**Lola:** Yes, I can!

**Lana:** No, you can't!

**Lola:** Yes, I can!

**Lana:** No, you can't!

**Lola:** Yes, I can, yes, I can!

**Lana:** Anything you can be, I can be greater.

Sooner or later, I'm greater than you.

**Lola:** No, you're not!

**Lana:** Yes I am!

**Lola:** No, you're not!

**Lana:** Yes, I am!

**Lola:** No, you're not!

**Lana:** Yes, I am, yes, I am!

I can fix a toilet, you would only spoil it.

**Lola:** I can do a tap dance, even wearing Dad's pants.

**Lana:** I can live on trash and bugs!

**Lola:** And only on that?

**Lana:** Yup!

**Lola:** So can a rat.

**Lana:** Anything you can say, I can say louder.

**Lola:** I can say anything louder than you.

**Lana:** No, you can't!

**Lola:** Yes, I can!

**Lana:** No, you can't!!

**Lola:** Yes, I can!!

**Lana:** No, you can't!!!

**Lola:** Yes, I can!!!

**Lana:** No you CAN'T!!!

**Lola:** YE-E-E-E-ES I-I CAN!!!!

**Lana:** *(spoken)* How can you sing that loud?!

**Lola:** *(spoken)* I'm a princess.

**Lana:** Anyone you can shock, I can shock better.

**Lola:** I can shock anyone better than you.

**Lana:** *(stealthily)* No, you can't.

**Lola:** *(stealthily)* Yes, I can.

**Lana:** *(stealthily)* No, you can't.

**Lola:** *(stealthily)* Yes, I can.

**Lana:** *(stealthily)* No, you can't.

**Lola:** *(suddenly)* YES, I CAN!

**Lana:** I can eat my ice cream,

Faster than a sunbeam.

**Lola:** I can eat it faster,

'Cause I am the master.

**Lana:** I can eat a hundred flies!

**Lola:** That you yourself caught?

**Lana:** Yup!

**Lola:** That's what I thought. You're gross!

**Lana:** Any blocks you can stack, I can stack higher.

**Lola:** I can stack any blocks higher than you.

**Lana:** No, you can't!

**Lola:** Yes, I can!

**Lana:** No, you can't!

**Lola:** Yes, I can!

**Lana:** No, you ca-a-a-a-a-an't!

**Lola:** Yes, I can, yes I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I can!

**Lana:** Yes, you ca-a-a-an! *(spoken)* Lola, you're full of hot air!

**Lola:** Hey!

**Lana:** Hey!

Any ball you can throw, I can throw farther.

**Lola:** I can throw any ball farther than you.

**Lana:** No, you can't!

**Lola:** Yes, I can!

**Lana:** No, you can't!

**Lola:** Yes, I can!

**Lana:** No, you can't! ---*(inaudible fighting)*

**Lana:** I can fix cars, no less!

**Lola:** I can wear a ball dress.

**Lana:** I can wear a sweater.

**Lola:** My hygiene is better.

**Lana:** I can do most anything!

**Lola:** Can you touch the sky?

**Lana:** No.

**Lola:** Neither can I.

**Lana:** Any puppy eyes you give, I can give better.

**Lola:** I can give puppy eyes better than you.

**Lana:** *(affectionately)* No, you can't.

**Lola:** *(affectionately)* Yes, I can.

**Lana:** *(affectionately)* No, you can't.

**Lola:** *(affectionately)* Yes, I can.

**Lana:** *(affectionately)* No, you can't.

**Lola:** *(affectionately)* Yes, I can.

**Lana:** *(affectionately)* No, you can't.

**Lola:** *(affectionately)* Oh, yes, I can.

**Lana:** No, you can't, can't, can't!

**Lola:** Yes, I can, can, can!

**Both:** Yes/no... you... CAN/CAN'T!