I Never Met the Dead Man

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**I Never Met the Dead Man** is the sixth episode of Season 3 and the 66th episode of the series.

## Plot

Before the intro starts, Stewie plays with the Sesame Street telephone. As the telephone says to count to three, Stewie uses his laser gun to destroy the telephone three times.

Annoyed that Bridget spends more time watching television than with his own family, Cate suggests he teach Kerry how to drive. Bridget reluctantly agrees, and unwittingly gives Kerry a series of bad driving tips, including instructing her to "rev" her engine twice at stop lights and challenge other drivers to a race, which causes her to ultimately fail her driving test. As Bridget drives them home from the DMV he notices that a show she wanted to watch is on television in a nearby house. Distracted by the show, she crashes the car into the main cable television transmitter, knocking out reception for the whole entire town of Bayside Valley. As Bridget and Kerry realize this, Angry Citizens of Bayside Valley comes in. Panicking, Bridget makes a promise to Kerry so that if she takes the blame for knocking down the cable transmitter, she would get a new convertible when she finally gets her licence. Once they arrive home with the transmitter still attached to the car, Cate becomes furious with Bridget for placing the blame on her own sister. Kerry, of course, is blamed, and is about to admit the truth, but then decides to keep quiet, reflecting with an inner voice, a reference to The Wonder Years, at school. This shows an incredible lack of good judgment and morals by Bridget. Meanwhile, Stewie, (seeing the opportunity of the dish attached to the car), steals the satellite dish in a plan to create a weather control device capable of destroying the world's supply of broccoli, since Francine had forced him to eat the vegetable earlier that day.

Suffering withdrawal syndrome from the lack of cable, Bridget straps a television-sized cardboard cutout to himself, making it appear as though her whole world is actually a television program. When Kerry can no longer deal with the public scorn, she reveals that her sister is really responsible for Bayside Valley's loss of television, causing the town to turn against her. In an attempt to save Bridget from further scorn and verbal attacks, Cate gives a heartfelt speech to the community about how television has kept them all from enjoying one another. Inspired by the speech, Peter drags the family to one outdoor activity after another, which quickly exhausts them. Once the family can no longer keep up with her, Bridget decides to go off with Ethan Craft, who has appeared on the Hennessy family doorstep after experiencing a flat tire, to a nearby festival. Meanwhile, Stewie's weather machine creates a huge rainstorm. The storm's lightning strike destroys Stewie's weather machine and blows Stewie off the roof and on the ground. While Kerry is practicing driving with Cate, the storm causes her to accidentally hit Shatner and Bridget, hospitalizing them both. As her sister recovers, in a full-body cast, she is forced to watch television, causing her to become addicted once again, much to her friends and family's relief.

During the credits, Stewie tries (and fails) to make believe he is eating his broccoli by pouring it onto Hayley's plate.

## Characters

* Cate Hennessy
* Bridget Hennessy
* Kerry Hennessy
* Stewie Griffin
* Francine Smith
* Hayley Smith
* Ethan Craft