Deep Chillindude

Deep Chillindude is a fictional character based on former top player, smash personality, and rapper Kashan "Chillindude" Khan. In the Deep Leffen Alternative Universe, he has a battle record of 1-0, defeating Deep Leffen in the "War of the Words" competition  .

## The Battle (Part 1)

The verses are as follows. Note that Scar and Toph's commentary are removed for ease of reading.

**Big Leff:**

You're not known for winning, and I can't lose for the life of me

Your dropping stocks faster than your financial investments

You're my boy don't you know, take a seat or get gone

They call you Big Chill because your ass is on wrong

I'll throw your ass outside, then I'll get inside your ass I'm gonna send you home with your mouth full of grass.

**Big Chill:**

Yo but first, I'm just here to remind you I don't got a sponsor

I do it for the kids, and they're all autistic

I said that last week, and I hope I still get a follow

My music puts you to sleep, that's fine. Some people need that

I've been working on this shit all day, how do you find the time?

In this round you'll be dead, and you'll be lying in your coffin

While I'm with girl who will also be in a coffin

**Big Leff:**

I got an almost perfect IQ of 99 and muscles as strong as Dynamite

If there were a prize for being 2nd, you'd be the runner-up.

If there were a prize for being 3rd, you'd get that prize. That's easy money for you.

From what I understand, there aren't prizes for being 4th.

Check me out on LinkedIn. I just filled out my profile.

FYI, your mom will call you later today,

She says she's worried about you

**[returns with another verse]**

You're like a retired boxer, put a glass of milk on your dick

And when I win I'm gonna roundhouse my own prick

I'll slap you so hard you'll taste the back of my palm

Me and my boy Mang0 gonna kiss on those lips of yours

I bet your wife smells like flowers, a field of tulips

And I bet you're not bad on the nose yourself

**Big Chill**
I thought we talked about this, keep my wife out of your mouth

Try to direct your hostility towards me, but keep my friends and family out of this

I love my wife more than you'll ever know

We have a love based on mutual respect and admiration for each other

I'll pull my cock out and smash it against this table

If that ain't enough, I'll pull your dick and balls out too

We can make a night out of it, and I’ll be fucking cordial

And guess what, friend? I’ll treat you right

I’ll spank you on the lips and slap you goodnight

**[Big Chill does ollies with a tech deck, Deep Leffen whispers something into his ear before galloping like a horse and delivering the next verse]**

**Big Leff:**

I forgot you played Smash, I thought you wanted an autograph

The only good thing about your Fox is that it made people laugh

I’m going to Six Flags after this, let me know if you wanna join

We’ve been homies forever, but why can't we be boysss?

Just kidding Big Chill, I’m going with your son.

He calls me daddy now because I’m number one

**[Big Chill takes off a weighted vest]**

**Big Chill:**
You think you're shit don't stink, but I can assure you it does

Because I've been dealing with your shit since 2001.

You’re a Swedish Fish, and my hook’s about to kill

Respond to my LinkedIn request so we can Big Chill

I got a career, you don't got one to end

Respond to my Facebook pokes so we can be friends

Respond to my Emails so we can be colleagues

Respond to my DMs so we can be homies

Respond to my Candy Crush invitations so we be candy bros

**[Big Chill kicks Big Leff in the face, rendering him unconscious and winning the rap battle. He crowd surfs.]**

## The Aftermath (Part 2)

After the crowd goads Big Chill into violence, he then proceeds to body slam and hoist Deep Leffen's corpse into the air, chanting "Smash 'Em Up" and "Chill 'Em Up, Chill 'Em Down, Chill 'Em All Around" and seemingly endorsing Big Ten Cereal. After the crowd dies down, he starts to deliver an encore verse, but is interrupted by Flapcannon Bonedragon and John. Deep Scar & Toph begin to lose consciousness as the two men open their trench coats to reveal dynamite.

## References

1. ↑ 1.0 1.1  https://www.patreon.com/posts/deep-leffen-deep-41385077
2. ↑  https://www.patreon.com/posts/deep-leffen-deep-42152673
3. ↑  https://www.patreon.com/m/5212719/posts