Episode 108 - Apprehensions

## Apprehensions

A black background with a small simple start like white shapes in each of the four corners, each with a trail of white dots after it. These make up the border. Within the border a white snowflake can be seen, with six evenly spaced red eyes looking inwards running around it. Bellow this image but still within the border the words "108.APPREHENSIONS" are depicted in white

### Author

William A Wellman

Victoria knocks at the door, Percy gets some space, and Cindy talks survival. The theme of tonight’s episode is Apprehensions.

> ***Content warning**: Ableism, Animal death (Heidi, Big Mikey’s favorite recipes), Birds, Gun Mention, Emotional Manipulation, Body horror*
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## Intro - What Else To Lose

Nikignik narrates to the Dreamers Percy Reed, asking himself what else he had to lose. For a long time, the answer to that question had been nothing, so little left of him that there was no more cause to worry, should his last thread snap how easy it would be from him to float up to the sky (see Ghosts). Ad yet he had also gained, and wondered if it was foolish to hope that he would ever be able to keep them, to stop them from slipping away.

Nikignik stands in front of a closed door at Downing Hill public Library with Victoria Tepiani as she knocks on said door.

## Story 1 - The Other Side

Victoria Tepiani knocks on the door to Clara Martin's dormitory, having been moved to a seemingly isolated wing of Downing Hill Publick library, she calls out asking if she could come in and telling her know who she was. Cara opens the door, not fully, and asks if they'd found Friday Rescher (see Episode 90 - Tests), but Victoria tells her they hadn't, she was there because she wanted to talk to her, once again asking if she could come in. Clara tells hr she was busy, and attempts to close the door, but Victoria sticks her boot in the doorway and tells her that she was busy too, and if she was coming to talk to Clara, she'd ask that she wasn't brushed off as Clara was not the first person she'd pick for conversation. Clara lets her in, and Victoria finds the inside of the room to be in a mess. Victoria asks Clara what C. S. Blackletter was doing to her, because she'd seen what was happening to her now happen to Olivier Song, watching them become absent. Clara tells her that she wasn't Olivier, she knew what she was doing.

Clara asks why Victoria suddenly cared about how she was, asking where that concern had been in Episode 78 - Runaways, asking how Arnold Eggers was doing (see Episode 82 - Failures). Victoria tells her that she wasn't in control of herself at that time, an if she'd stayed, she was going to hurt someone. Clara points out that she'd left, and people had gotten hurt anyway. Victoria goes to leave, telling her that all she'd come to say was for Clara to not let Blackletter destroy her. Victoria was only at Downing Hill to learn, and then she'd go home to her parents. She tells Clara that whatever was on the other side of Downing Hill for her, to not lose sight of it. Clara tells her that unless she figured it out and fought for it, there was no other side for her. Clara closes the door, leaving Victoria in the hallway again. She briefly considers going back in but decides against it and walks away.

### Interlude 1 - Safer Now

Nikignik tells the Dreamers that after the end of the world, more than the fear of anything else humans felt afraid of what another may feel compelled to do. He asks if there had been more trust among humans, would the world have fallen apart the same, had they understood that evil was not in the hearts of each other but in the sky, and the water, and their minds. Many of them want North, only to find that it belonged to someone else, and the road was not so scarcely travelled as they'd though. They ask who was safer, those who clustered in fallen cities and faced the darkness that climbed out of the street gutter a night. Or those who lived in the Hallowoods and met first each new horror born from the water.

## Story 2 - Soulmates

Percy Reed sits around a fireplace with the rest of the group on the expedition north (See Episode 106 - Departures). He asks Diggory Graves how long they thought Big Mikey would be traveling with them for (see Episode 107 - Absences), as he didn't think Cindy Lockheart wanted it to be much longer. Diggory expresses to him that they didn't understand why Cindy hated them, but Percy tells them it was probably just habit for her. He asks Diggory if they loved him, and they tell him that they did, that he was the most important thing in their life. However, they also tell him that he didn't need to cling to them always. Percy gets defensive at this, but Diggory rephrases to say that they meant they wished Percy to get to know the others more and let them know him instead of spending all his time with Diggory.

Percy takes this to mean that Diggory didn't want him around anymore, and says as much, standing up from his place next to them. Diggory apologises, telling him that they had not meant to offend him, and he asks them if it had occurred to them that he needed them. As e was going through the loss of both his parents (see Percy Reed) and made a deal with Oswald Biggs Botulus (see Episode 87 - Boxes). Diggory expresses confusion at Percy mentioning a deal (see Episode 96 - Horizons), but Percy ignores them and begins to walk away, asking them that if they wanted space, how much did they want. They tell him that space wasn't what they were asking for but sometimes it was good. Percy leaves his metal body (see Episode 93 - Mirrors) and floats up through the tree canopy.

### Marketing - The Long Game

Lady Ethel Mallory interrupts Nikignik's broadcast with her 'Marketing' segment and tells the Dreamers that the one rule they had to remember in marketing was that humans were scared of new things. Because of this, there was no better tool in their toolbox than the art of a pitch, but she'd known that this wouldn't have worked with the Botulus Corporation, as there was too much fear to fight. She tells them that the other way to get around fear was the long game, laid years of groundwork and showed the customers that what they stood for was their world. So now the new and terrifying thing was being shown to them for the first time by someone who they trusted, who they believed would not lie to them. Except they had been getting lied to the whole time, because marketing was always about the sell.

### Story 2, Continued - Soulmates

Percy flies away until he reaches the end of his thread (see Harp String). He is frustrated and emotional, knowing that he was out of place in getting angry at Diggory and wondering why it was that he seemed incapable of being happy. He stops when he sees Jonah Duckworth sitting on a rock edge and approaches him knowing that Jonah would not be able to see him (see Ghosts). Jonah verbally points out the sudden appearance of the Shuddering Peaks, stating that he'd been wondering if they were going to show up, and Percy silently questions if he was talking to himself before Jonah addresses Percy directly and tells him that he'd never been there but Walter 'Walt' Pensive had told him about them. Jonah asks if Percy was alright, but also reassures him that he didn't have to explain. Percy asks Jonah what his deal was, and Jonah tells him that he didn't know, explaining to him the cabinet incident (see Episode 1 - Keys) as well as what he knew about the temple of the end, the Heralds and Marolmar although he does not know him by name.

Jonah tells him that he didn't know what he was supposed to do, but he knew what he was going to do which was destroy the Heart of Marolmar for good, it had to go and maybe if it stopped, he'd stop getting worse. He tells Percy that he was worried about the others in the group and tells him that he was sorry about Solomon Reed dying (see Episode 47 - Regrets), but Percy tells him that he'd had it coming. Percy asks if Jonah believed in soulmates. Jonah tells him he didn't, that he thinks it was about who was there for them, and they got to choose that. Jonah asks if this helped Percy, and Percy tells him that it did, though he thinks to himself that he didn't know. Jonah announces that he was going to head back to the group, telling Percy to let him know if the Mountains knew, as he was suspecting them to be avoiding them, which was good, but it meant going through the Northmost woods. Jonah leaves, and Percy sits wondering what the future would look like if they came back alive.

### Interlude 2 - What Gods Fear

Nikignik speaks to the Dreamers that the life of Indescribables was might and varied in their impossible powers. And yet they were not devoid of fears. He tells them that largely they did not want to know what Indies feared, things that troubled them on a daily basis would be incomprehensible to the Dreamers. But some things were not, like that some Indescribable beings hoarded power as they were afraid they would need it, guarded suns as they feared that suns could extinguish. Some preserved the order of things because they had seen the darkness that dwelled beyond the order, and hoped the light would keep it at bay.

## Story 3 - A Lot Of Her Left

Cindy Lockheart complains about having to sleep in the presence of Big Mikey as she feared that he would eat one of them. Riot Maidstone tells her that he'd only do that if he didn't like them. Cindy tells her that regardless of this it was time for Mikey to leave. Mort speaks up, saying that Mikey was his friend, and he didn't want him to leave, Riot backs this and tells Cindy that she was being a jerk. Hector Mendoza asks if he could talk to Cindy privately, which she accepts and walks away from the group with him. He tells her that trying to fight the strangeness of the Hallowoods wouldn't work, relating to this with his own lived experience (see Hector Mendoza). That the Hallowoods was like an animal, if they learned how it worked, they could stay out of its way. She tells him that she'd had enough nature loving talks from the leaders of Scoutpost Two and every time they talked about it, she was reminded of all the people she'd lost because of it.

Hector tells her that he was familiar with Revenants, but he had also learned that they could help, they wanted to help, so she should use them to get to her real enemy, the journey. That was what they had to survive. Cindy concludes that there was no point in arguing with him, so she tanks him for his perspective and tells him that she'd take it into consideration as she continued to lead the expedition. They hear a stir from the camp, and she runs back, pistol drawn asking what had happened. Olivier Song tells her that it was the first snow of the season.

## Outro - Apprehensions

Nikignik waxes poetics about apprehensions, telling the Dreamers that they had so many worries in such a small frame. They were all valid, and he would like to say there was nothing to worry about, and it would all be fine, and tell them to rest easy knowing there would be peace. But they would know it was a lie, for he was not omniscient, and he did not see the future. But what he could tell them was that many of these questions would be answered by time. He ponders what to do while they awkwardly waited for the future to make up its mind about what would become the present, suggested they did not spend that time in worry. He tells them to do whatever they did for fun, set a few things in motion as though things were going to go well, because more often than not, they would. And when the terrible future arrived, and was past, they would still be there, one more day spent living, one more night spent dreaming.