Jeb The Goat vs Discord

## Description

2 Fighters! No research! 60 Seconds! MELEE!!!! Who would win between the part animal, part dragon and part goat and the Spirit of Chaos? Find out in 60 quick seconds!

## Interlude

ONE MINUTE MELEE!

WHERE ALL THE FIGHTS ARE SETTLED IN 60 SECONDS!

2 FIGHTERS! NO RESEARCH! 60 SECONDS!

MELEE!

## MELEE!

Discord is sitting on his throne, causing chaos in Ponyville.

Discord: Chaos is a wonderful, wonderful thing!

He is about to drink a glass of chocolate milk, when he suddenly feels a pain in his head.

Discord: What's going on?!

A giant shadow then flies over Discord. Cthulhu had flown over him. Discord gets angry and grows to Jeb the Goat's size and extends his arm and pokes Jeb the Goat's head. Jeb lands and turns to look at Discord.

Jeb The Goat: Do you mind getting rid of my headache?

Jeb at Discord in response.

Jeb the Goat: I'll take that as a no then.
Jeb the Goat charged across the ground, knocking aside groups of Riptocs as he ran through the large city that these Riptocs were apparently trying to invade. Discord blasted another Riptoc to the ground with a puff of fire, and with each Riptoc he took out, he collected more and more gems.

Jeb the Goat was having a fun time here, and so was a bit disappointed when he found he had gotten rid of all the Riptocs in this city. Wandering around for a bit, Discord looked around his surroundings to see if there was anything else he could take on.

His thoughts were answered when he looked ahead and saw a goat of all things walking around, the hoofed mammal's tongue hanging out. “A goat, eh?” Discord said to himself. “Well, it's not a sheep, but it'll do.”

Jeb the Goat then lowered his head and charged at the goat, ramming it head-on and sending it smacking against a building. Smiling in victory, Discord proceeded to move on, only for a bleat from behind to distract the dragon. Turning around, Jeb the Goat saw in surprise that the goat had gotten back up and didn't seem to be fazed at all by Discord's charge.

The goat bleated again as Discord took a combat pose. Maybe he could have a little bit more fun.

\*cue battle theme\*

In Goat City Bay, Discord the dragon and a goat proceeded to engage in battle. Discord charged at the goat again, once more ramming her and sending her tumbling away. Once again, however, the attack did nothing as the goat stood back up. The goat came charging at Discord, her tongue flapping through the wind as she charged. Having the basic knowledge that she was about to headbutt him, Jeb the Goat raised up his wings in front of him in the form of a shield, only to be taken by surprise once more when the goat headbutted his wings with enough force to send the dragon rolling away.

Jeb the Goat got back to his feet just as the goat came charging forward. Smoke rising from his nostrils, Discord opened his mouth and released a quick burst of fire, striking the goat head-on and engulfing her...

...Only for the goat to keep on moving forward like nothing happened, the hoofed mammal completely disregarding the flames covering her body.

Shocked, Jeb the Goat was left wide open as the goat headbutted him square in the face, sending him tumbling away. Surprised at the strength of the blow, Discord got back up, only to see the goat charging at him again. Knowing better than to let her get near him again, Discord promptly charged away, running across the streets as the goat pursued him. Jeb the Goat looked back and grinned to himself, seeing that he was outpacing the goat and was gaining a good distance away from her.

Stopping in his tracks once he felt he gained sufficient distance, Jeb the Goat turned and charged up his next attack, watching as the goat began to catch up to him. His attack fully charged, Discord released a large fireball, striking the goat head-on and sending her flying away, the goat merely letting out a bleat as she fell into another part of the city.

“Oh yeah!” Discord said in victory. “That's what I'm talking about!” Jeb the Goat then ran towards where the goat had landed to see where her carcass was.

Now Discord, like anyone who had never met this goat before, had fully expected to find the goat's corpse burning in flames and charred black, just like anyone else who was hit by a fireball and wasn't fireproof.

And so he was utterly surprised to see the goat stand back up just fine, as if nothing even happened. The goat turned towards Discord and let out a bleat. Shaking his head to get back into focus, Discord ran at the goat as the goat charged at the dragon. Before the caprine could land in a headbutt, Discord stabbed and struck away at her with his horns, each blow shoving the goat backwards, until Jeb the Goat then slammed his tail into the goat's face, sending the hoofed mammal rolling away. Pressing his assault, Discord gathered chi into his wings, before releasing it in an X shape, nailing the goat head-on, sending her tumbling away. Standing back up, the goat bleated again, before charging forward before Jeb the Goat could attack again, headbutting him hard in the chest and sending him flying into a building, bouncing off a wall as nearby humans ran away screaming.

Standing back up despite the blow, Jeb the Goat growled as he watched the goat begin to charge again, before he discharged a fireball, this one not being charged up and curving upwards through the air, coming down behind the goat. Though the goat was not directly hit, the explosion sent her tumbling forward, allowing Jeb the Goat to run forward and freeze her up with his ice breath. If Discord couldn't burn her, he'd encase her in ice and let her freeze to death. Making sure to thoroughly freeze her up, Discord stepped back to view his work, the goat remaining frozen in midair as she was surrounded by ice in such a style that would've made an impressive ice sculpture.

Pleased with his work, Discord turned and walked away, believing that he had won this battle.

All he did was delay it.

The goat had plenty of tricks left, as she activated her tornado mutator, promptly creating a tornado around herself that tore apart the ice, whilst simultaneously carrying her around through the air. Turning at the sound of the ice breaking, Discord was taken by surprise as he found himself being caught in the tornado. The two were flung around and around as the tornado drifted about, before the goat suddenly stopped using the whirlwind, causing the two of them to be flung away, the goat tumbling across the street, whilst Discord slammed into a lamp post, knocking it over. Standing back up, Discord glared at the goat as the mammal once again stood back up like nothing happened. The goat then charged forward, but Discord ran to the mammal's left, dodging her charge, before he retaliated with his electric breath, striking her and shocking her, though it didn't seem to faze her that much. Still, she was left wide open for yet another charge from Jeb the Goat knocking her into a tall building, the goat smashing through the glass doors and crashing into a table, more people running away as the goat stood back up.

Jeb the Goat then proceeded to pelt his ungulate foe with a series of fireballs, each explosion knocking the goat around. Eventually, the goat managed to charge forward as Discord was attempting to charge up his next fireball, before she headbutted him hard in the face, sending him crashing into a couch. Before the dragon could stand up, the goat licked him...

...And then proceeded to drag him around like he was weightless. Discord attempted to pull away from his foe, but to no avail as the goat dragged him into an elevator. As the elevator closed and started to go upwards, the goat beat away at Jeb the Goat with a series of headbutts, eventually causing the dragon to cough up blood as he felt his ribs begin to break from the assault. Finally, as the elevator reached the top of the building and opened up to reveal a dance party going on, the goat headbutted Discord out of the elevator and across the rooftop.

Glad to have more space to get back into the action, Jeb the Goat stood up, the goat charging at her draconic foe even as all the people kept on dancing to Deadmau5's beat. Not wanting to get headbutted again, Jeb the Goat jumped back while shooting a charged up fireball, sending the goat slamming into the elevator, only for the mammal to get back up and charge again. Jeb the Goat turned and ran away from the goat, charging through the crowd of people and sending them all flying off the building. Leaping onto the stage, Discord watched as the DJ kept on playing music, even as the goat came up after the dragon. The goat then suddenly donned a mask just like Deadmau5's, as the goat started making her own music as it came from nowhere.

Discord suddenly found himself dancing uncontrollably, the DJ and all the people that hadn't been knocked off the building dancing away as well. Unable to break free from this dancing was left wide open to a headbutt to the face from the goat, sending the dragon slamming onto the small wall surrounding the rim of the rooftop. Shaking his head clear as blood leaked from his nostrils, Discord stood up as he watched the goat jump down from the stage, thankful that the mammal stopped playing her music. The goat came charging forward, but Jeb the Goat jumped to the goat's right. It just so happened that there was a firework directly behind Discord, and the goat ran right into it, causing the firework to fly up into the sky, carrying the goat with it. Discord watched as the firework flew higher upwards, before going off in a colorful explosion, causing the goat to plummet from the sky. After watching the pretty firework explosion for a moment, Discord came by the rim of the building and watched the goat hit the ground far below. Good. There's no way she could've survived a fall like tha-

The goat immediately stood up, completely unfazed by the blow.

If Discord had found the right words to convey his utter shock, they would simply be: What the actual skreeonk.

Shaking his head again to get focused in the battle, Discord leaped down from the building, gliding downwards as the goat merely watched with her tongue still hanging from her mouth. Discord landed a good distance away from the goat as he faced her, his back to the water that led to the ocean. Charging up another attack as the goat came charging forward, Jeb the Goat shot a charged electric attack, creating an electric tornado that engulfed her and swung her around for a moment. The tornado then tossed the goat into the building, the mammal bouncing off as she fell to the ground, only to immediately stand up again. Growling, Discord charged at his mammal foe, but the goat turned towards him and let out a particularly loud bleat, the force of the sound knocking Jeb the Goat clear off his feet and sending him flying across the water and into the opening of a sewer pipe.

After rolling across the floor of the sewers for a moment, Jeb the Goat stood up as he shook his head, only to stare in surprise as the Ninja Turtles stared back at him, the ninjas having their pizza right at that moment. The dragon and the turtles just stared at each other in utter surprise, neither side knowing what to say at this moment.

Their moment was cut off by the goat charging in on the scene, headbutting Jeb the Goat in the side and sending him rolling away, the Ninja Turtles running away as Jeb the Goat stood up and faced his opponent. The goat charged forward, but Discord, the dragon charging up his chi, released a shockwave that blew the goat away, out of the sewer and into the water. Jeb the Goat charged after his opponent, gliding over the goat and landing on the beach. Turning around as he watched the goat bounce across the surface of the water to try and reach him, Discord fired an electric beam into the water, electrocuting the mammal as Discord held onto the beam. After a while, Discord ceased his attack, only to charge up an ice shot and firing it into the water, freezing up the surface of the water and trapping the goat in ice once more. Grinning, Jeb the Goat charged at his frozen foe, ramming her hard and knocking her into the water. Diving into the water and easily swimming around her, Discord rammed the goat onto the dock, the mammal running away as Discord jumped from the water and pursued her.

The two ran across the streets for a short while, the goat using her Uncle Goat mutator to sling herself across the city with her tongue, only for Jeb the Goat to shot at her with a fireball, managing to strike her and knock her out of the sky. This allowed the dragon to catch up to the goat and ram her hard, sending her tumbling forward until she was hit by a truck, being sent rolling away onto the sidewalk. The goat stood up, letting out a bleat as Discord stood his ground. “Alright, goaty,” Discord said with great determination. “Let's finish this!”

discord and the goat immediately charged each other, ramming one another head-on and causing them to be knocked backwards. Standing up first, Discord charged up and fired an ice shot, encasing the goat in ice and allowing the dragon to charge into her, shattering her from her ice and sending her slamming into the window of a shoe store. Discord jumped in after her, only for the goat to headbutt him back out into the streets. The goat jumped out of the shattered window, running up to Discord and licking him again. “Oh no, you don't!” Discord said, before he quickly charged away, dragging the goat with him. The hoofed mammal was helpless as Discord slammed her into speeding cars, lamp poles, random people, buildings, and anything else as he kept on running.

WHICH IMMORTAL GOAT WILL WIN? FIGHT!

Discord is still affected by Jeb the Goat's physic attack. This gives Jeb the Goat advantage. He flies at Discord and punches him in the stomach. Discord then clicks his fingers and winged pigs appear, but as soon as they appear, they are all affected by Discord's physic attack.

Discord: Whoa, whoa, whoa, lemme get this straight: Whenever you're around, everyone has a headache? You cheater!

Jeb the Goat then grabs Discord and flies down and crashes into the chocolate milk. He then begins to choke Discord. But Discord teleports and punches Jeb the Goat, his fist tearing out of Jeb the Goat's stomach.

Jeb The Goat: So you're soft, huh? This should be a piece of farm. But the problem is my headache! Get out of there!

Jeb turns around and grabs Discord's neck. He then crushes it in his hands, arm, killing Discord.

K.O.! THIS MELEE'S VICTORY GOES TO...
JEB THE GOAT