Chieftain Muscles-Glasses

*“Let’s get this bussy.”* - Chieftain Muscles-Glasses

*“He got my bussy!”* - Women of Tribe Mad Chad

## History

Known as ‘Chief’ by his peers and subjects, ‘Muscles-Glasses’ by others, and ‘Daddy’ to the female persuasion, this goblin leader is unusual, to say the very least. For one, despite his stature of only three feet in height, he weighs nearly two-hundred pounds, with a body fat percentage of less than one percent. In other words, the little guy is ripped. He claims that his mother was Nocticula and his father was none other than Hadregash himself, and his goblin tribe, Tribe Mad Chad, believes him entirely. The truth of such claims is arguable at best, but there’s still no denying that Muscles-Glasses has the charisma and personal power to boast about whatever he wants. Originally a tribeless exile, he was born a runt in a family of runts. He dreamed of becoming a goblin chieftain one day, but was as talentless as a dead dog, and about as smart as one too. That is, until he found Betty Grindlewald.

Since then, he’s come into his own. Whatever price he paid Betty is still unknown, and none of the goblins in Skyreach Forest know that Muscles-Glasses used to be a pip-squeak with barely any gall to speak to women. Now, however, he has fathered his own tribe, stealing the goblin-wives of several other chieftains in the Skyreach and claiming them for his own. Attracting followers from all around, Muscles-Glasses has formed a cult of personality that not only includes goblins, but also a small number of kobolds, a band of derro, an ogre, some hobgoblins, and a few bugbears. His firstborn, Wesley Pipes, stands at twice Muscles-Glasses’ own height, and is just as muscular and charming with the ladies as his father. Commanding the third-largest goblin tribe, and growing, Muscles-Glasses has plans that include establishing goblin dominance over a large swath of forest, as well as creating an army large enough to march upon The Stain, showing everyone else how superior goblins are by sundering The Stain himself.

Chieftain Muscles-Glasses rides upon Snaggletooth, a hairless donkey he acquired from a swamp outside of the Skyreach Forest, and with his trusty Masterwork Horsechopper in hand, he has personally laid claim to choppin’ five horses, thirteen dogs, a giant goliath spider, a roc, and an entire den of mites, all without help from any other goblin. His combat prowess is nothing to scoff at, despite his diminutive stature, and he’s proclaimed to all within the Skyreach Forest that he will accept any challenge, and fight any duel. So far, he’s had three takers, each of which he’s beaten; the gluttonous ogre Tiny, the Kobold Chieftain Krisskrass, and the Hobgoblin Chieftain Hundo, each of which he’s spared and added to his own ranks, much to their initial chagrin. Since then, however, they’ve come to love and adore Muscles-Glasses as if they themselves were his own children, especially Tiny.

## Conquered

* Five horses
* Thirteen dogs
* One giant spider
* One roc
* A den of Mites
* Tiny the Ogre
* Kobold Chieftain Krisskrass
* Hobgoblin Chieftain Hundo
* All the women in his tribe

## Yet to Conquer

* Chieftain Thousand Teeth
* Commander Elluen Illimvosra
* Hucksley Mistmarch, Priest of Kurgess
* The Stain
* You, if you're reading this
* Your women too