Unikitty! The Movie A Simpsons Parody

*(2021 Warner Bros. Pictures logo (bylineless version))*

*(Bugs Bunny stands up in front of the logo as the fanfare ends, and we zoom out to reveal its in a movie theater where all WB characters are watching a Warner Bros. movie)*

**Bugs Bunny:** Ugh! This movie is so boring already!

**Dr. Fox:** Bugs, we can't see the movie!

**Bugs Bunny:** I can't believe we're paying to see something we get on TV for free. If you ask me, everybody in this theater is a giant sucker. ***Especially* you!**

*[Bugs pointing to the viewer.]*

*[The opening scene appear]*

*[In Unikingdom Lake are Green Day playing Unikitty! Theme and the crowd cheers. Robin the Blue Monster is carried but is released into the ground.]*

**Robin the Blue Monster:** Excuse me. My heinie is dipping.

*[The music ends.]*

**Billie Joe:** All right, well, thanks a lot for coming. We've been
playing for three and a half hours. Now we'd like just a minute of your
time to say something about the environment.

*[Silence occurs and the crowd throwing bottles at them and boo them.]*

**Man:** Oh, you suck! Shut up and play!

**Burger Person:** Preachy!

**Mike:** We're not being preachy.

**Tré Cool:** But the pollution in your lake, it's dissolving our barge.

**Dr. Fox:** I thought they touched on a vital issue.

**Beatsby:** I beg to differ.

*[Throws a rock and hits tre cool]*

**Mike:** Gentlemen, it's been an honor playing with you tonight.

*[Green Day starts playing and the barge sinks. Dr. Fox looks worried. On Sesame Street a funeral version of "American Idiot" is playing.]*

**Alert Siren:** For the latest rock band to die in this kingdom Lord, hear our prayer.

**The group:** Lord, hear our prayer.

*[Outside the church are Unikitty and her gang coming.]*

**Dr. Fox:** I hate being late.

**Hawkodile:** Well, I hate going. Why can't I worship the Lord in my own way, by praying like hell on my deathbed?

**Dr. Fox:** Hawkodile, they can hear you inside.

**Hawkodile:** Relax. Those pious morons are too busy talking to their phony-baloney God.

*[The Gang coming in and the audience staring at them. The Gang goes and sits down.]*

**Hawkodile:** How you doing? Peace be with you. Praise Jebus.

*[Puppycorn plays*Baby Blast*. Unikitty takes out the game card.]*

**Alert Siren:** Today I'd like to try something a little different. I'm going to call on one of you!

*[Alert Siren points to the audience, they all cower down in fear, Kickflip screams.]*

**Alert Siren:** Now, the word of God dwells within everyone. I want you to let that word out. Let your spirit...

*[Dino Dude raises his hand.]*

**Dino Dude:** Ooh! Ooh! Ooh

**Alert Siren:** *[unhappily]* What is it, Dino?

**Dino Dude:** The good Lord is telling me to confess to something.

*[Master Frown keeps fingers crossed and whispers.]*

**Master Frown:** Gay, gay, gay, gay.

**Dino Dude:** An immodest sense of pride in our community.

**Alert Siren:** *[annoyed]* Somebody else? Let the Lord's light shine upon you. Feel the spirit. Let it out!

*[Richard is sleeping and wakes up when the sun hits his head and gets up and acts weird.]*

**Richard:** Horrible, horrible things are going to happen! *[Sssnake is filming that with his cell phone.]*And they're gonna happen to you! And you! And you! And you. Whoa, Nelly! People of Unikingdom, heed this warning: Twisted tail! A thousand eyes! Trapped forever!

**Unikitty:** Hawkodile, do something!

*[Hawkodile flicks through the "Holy Bible".]*

**Hawkodile:** This book doesn't have any answers!

**Richard:** *[yelling, slowly]* Beware! Beware! Time is short! EPA!! EPA!!! EEEEEEPAAAAAA!!!!!!! Believe me! Believe me! *[cheerfully]* Thanks for listening.

*[The Gang goes out the church with Richard rolled in a rug and go to the car.]*

**Hawkodile:** Okay, who wants waffles?

**Unikitty/Puppycorn/Richard:** I do, I do, I do!

**Dr. Fox:** Wait a minute. What about Richard?

**Puppycorn:** I want syrup!

**Unkitty:** I want strawberries!

**Dr. Fox:** Something happened to that man

**Hawkodile:** I'll tell you what happened to him. A certain someone had a senior moment. But that's okay, because we love him and we
 got a free rug out of it.

*[Hawkodile kisses Richard on the forehead.]*

**Dr. Fox:** What is the point of going to church every Sunday when if someone we love has a genuine religious experience, we ignore it? Right, Richard?

**Richard:** I want bananas on my waffles!

**Hawkodile:** I rest my case

*[The Gang arrives, Dr. Fox goes out of the car first and then the others except Richard.]*

**Dr. Fox:**I'm not dropping this.

**Richard:** Wait a minute, I'm still in the car.

**Hawkodile:** Oh, right *(and he opened the window a little bit)*

*[Unikitty looks at her list of chores. She ticks off "Go to church" and looks at "Take out the hornets' Nest".]*

**Unikitty:** Hmm Take out hornets' nest.

*[Unikitty takes down the hornets' nest and put it in Master Frown's mailbox.]*

**Unikitty:** Check. Fix sinkhole.

*[Unikitty is in the garden and put the sandbox and Pet Pet over the sinkhole.]*

**Unikitty:** Check. Re-shingle roof?

*[Unikitty and Puppycorn are on the ceiling and Unkitty tries to repair the roof.]*

**Unikitty:** Steady. Steady.

*[Unikitty gets the hammer in the eye and Puppycorn laughs.]*

**Unikitty:** *(turns red into Angry Kitty)* Why you little! I'll teach you to laugh at something that's funny! (turns pink again)

*[Unikitty tickles Puppycorn.]*

**Puppycorn:** (giggles) You know, we are on the roof. We could have some fun.

**Unikitty:** What kind of fun?

**Puppycorn:** How about a dare contest?

**Unikitty:** That sounds fun. I dare you to climb the TV antenna!

*[Puppycorn climbs up to the antenna]*

**Puppycorn:** Piece of cake.

**Unikitty:** Earthquake!

*[Unikitty shakes the TV antenna so Puppycorn falls down and hangs on the drainpipe.]*

**Unikitty:** Aftershock!

*[Unikitty shakes again.]*

**Dino Dude:** Unikitty, I don't mean to be a Nervous Pervis but if he falls, couldn't that make your Brother a paraplege-arino?

**Unikitty:** Shut up, Dino Dude

**Puppycorn:** Yeah, shut up, Dino Dude

**Unikitty:** Well said, Little bro

*[Unikitty and Puppycorn high five and Unikitty prepares to hammer Puppycorn's fingers.]*

**Unikitty:** Steady. Steady. Steady..

*[She falls through the roof and Puppycorn laughs.]*

*[Dr. Fox is in the neighborhood, knocking on doors to talk about Unikingdom Lake. However, every time she is denied.]*

**Dr Fox:** Hello. Sorry to bother you on a Sunday but I'm sure you're as worried about the pollution in Lake *Unikingdom* as I am. Lake *Unikingdom*has higher levels of mercury than ev...

**Woman:** Why, it's the little scientist l who saved my cat.

**Dr Fox:** Lake Unikingdom—

*[Dr Fox sighs.]*

**Robin:** Come on over, Dr Fox. You can canvass me as long as you want.

**Dr Fox:** Robin, you don't care about the environment.

**Robin:** Hey! I am very passionate about the planet.

**Master Frown:** *[threatening to punch Robin]* Say global warming is a myth.

**Robin:** It's a myth! Further study is needed!

*[Master Frown knocks down Robin.]*

**Master Frown**: That's for selling out your beliefs!

*[Dr fox goes to console him but quickly notices someone else to talk about the environment.]*

**Dr Fox:** Oh, poor old Robin.

**Robert:** Are you aware that a leaky facet can waste over—

**Dr Fox:** Two thousand gallons a year?

**Robert:** Turning off lights can save—

**Dr Fox:** Enough energy to power Pittsburgh.

**Robert:** And if we kept our thermostats at 68 in winter—

**Dr Fox:** We'd be free from our dependency on foreign oil in 17 years!

**Robert:** I'm Robert, the Purple Monster

**Dr Fox:** I haven't seen you at the lab.

**Robert:** Moved from Ireland. My dad's a musician.

**Dr Fox:** Is he...?

**Robert:** He's not Bono.

**Dr Fox:** I just thought, because you're Irish and...

**Robert:** He's not Bono.

**Dr Fox:** Do you play?

**Robert:** Just piano, guitar, trumpet, drums and bass. And also the saxophone,

**Dr Fox:** *[thinking]* He's pure gold. For once in your life. be cool.

**Robert:** So is your name as pretty as your face?

*[Dr Fox gets embarrassed and faints.]*

**Robert:** You okay there?

*[Hawkodil*e*watch the recording as Sssnake did and write down what Richard said.]*

**Richard:** *[in video]* Twisted tail! A thousand eyes! Trapped forever!!! EPA!!! EPA!!!

**Hawkodile:** EPA? What could that be?

**Sssnake:** I believe it's the sound the Green Lantern made when Sinestro threw him into a vat of acid. E-P-A!

**Hawkodile:** Yeah. Thanks for coming over.

**Sssnake:** Thanks for giving me your Boxing Gloves. Never known comfort like this.

*[Out in the garden, Puppycorn is shooting Unikitty with a BB gun while Unikitty carries around bricks. A WB commercial appears at the bottom.]*

**Unikitty:** Why did I suggest this?

*[Timer rings.]*

**Unikitty:** All right, bro, time for the ultimate dare. I dare you to skateboard to Happy Burger and back... *[Puppycorn picks up his skateboard]* naked.

**Puppycorn:** How naked?

**Unikitty:** Fourth base.

**Puppycorn:** Girls might see my doodle.

**Unikitty:** Oh, I see. Then I hereby declare you chicken for life. Every morning, you'll wake up to *Good morning, chicken.* At your wedding, I'll sing:

*[Unikitty sings*Here Comes the Bride*with chicken voice. Puppycorn sets off through town on his skateboard naked. The last note Unikitty sings in the chicken song has its pitch raised as Unikitty sees 'Puppycorn'**.**]*

**Rascal:** I like men now.

*[Really Old Edith urges residents not to look at Puppycorn's penis.]*

**Really Old Edith:** Don't look where I'm pointing!

*[The Action police see that Puppycorn is naked and start to chase him.]*

**Male Action Police:** Stop in the name of American squeamishness!

*[The Female Action Police fires a shot. It hits the wheel of Puppycorn's skateboard. The skateboard comes to a halt and Puppycorn flies off thrugh the air. The scene switches to Green Dad, Green Mom and Nostromoo eating at Happy Burger.]*

**Green Dad:** My family, before we eat, don't forget to thank the Lord for this bountiful...

*[Puppycorn flies on to the window, with Green Dad's french fry covering his penis.]*

**Green Dad: ...**Penis!

**Green Mom/Nostromoo:** Bountiful penis.

**Nostromoo:** Amen.

*[Two Action Police scrape Puppycorn's body off the window of Happy Burger.]*

**Female Action Police:** Listen, kid, nobody likes wearing clothes in public, but, you know, it's the law.

*[The Female Action Police takes Puppycorn down from the window and straps him naked to a lamp-post.]*

**Male Action Police:** Lunchtime!

**Puppycorn:** You can't just leave me out here.

**Male Action Police:** Don't worry, we found a friend for you to play with.

**Master Frown:** Ha ha! Ha ha!

*[It becomes evening, and Master Frown starts to get tired of laughing.]*

**Master Frown:** Ha ha... Haa... ha.

*[Brock walks up to Master Frown.]*

**Brock:** Master Frown, My pal, Where have you been? *[he sees Puppycorn]* Ha ha! Ha ha!

*[Unikitty's gang drives up to Happy Burger in her car.]*

**Puppycorn:** Unikitty!

**Unikitty:** What seems to be the problem, officers?

**Puppycorn:** Tell him you dared me to do it.

**Male Action Police:** If that's true, then you should be taking the rap here, not your little brother.

*[Unikitty's gang comes out of the car.]*

**Unikitty:** *[slowly]* And what happens to me if it's my fault?

**Male Action Police:** You'll have to attend a one-hour parenting class.

**Unikitty:** It was all his idea! He's out of control, I tell you! *[pretends to cry]* I'm at my wits' end. It's so....

*[Puppycorn glares.]*

**Male Action Police:** See you in court, kid.

**Unikitty:** Okay, guys, let's get some lunch.

**Puppycorn:** Did you at least bring my clothes?

*[Unikitty gives him his shirt and socks.]*

**Unikitty:** Shirt, socks, everything you need.

**Puppycorn:** You didn't bring my pants!

**Unikitty:** Who am I, Tommy Bahama?

**Puppycorn:** This is the worst day of my life.

**Unikitty:** The worst day of your life so far.

*[Unikitty's gang go into the Happy Burger.]*

**Dino Dude:** Say, Puppycorn?

**Puppycorn:** What do you want, Dino Dude?

**Dino Dude:** If you need pants, I carry an extra pair. You know how boys are, always praying through the knees.

*[Dino Dude gives him pants.]*

**Puppycorn:** Why are you helping me? I'm not your kid.

**Dino Dude:** We're neighbors. I'm sure your sister would do the same for my sons.

*[Unikitty steals french fries from Dino Dude.]*

**Unikitty:** Thank you.

*[*Unikitty *eats a hamburger noisily.]*

**Unikitty:** Hey, what's with you?

*[As she asks, she accidently spits on Puppycorn. Puppycorn wipes it off, annoyed.]*

**Puppycorn:** You really wanna know?

**Unikitty:** Of course I do. What kind of a father wouldn't care about... *[Hawkodile sees a pig wearing a chef hat]* ...

**Hawkodile:** Hey guys look,a pig wearing a hat!

*[Mr. Happy is starring in a commercial, holding a burger.]*

**Director:** Action.

**Mr. Happy:** Hey, hey! It's your old pal Mr. Happy, with my new pork sandwich, the Klogger. lf you can find a greasier sandwich, you're in Mexico!

*[Mr. Happy laughs and munches on the hamburger.]*

**Director:** And we're clear.

*[Mr. Happy spits out the hamburger.]*

**Mr. Happy:** Perfect. Cut, print, kill the pig.

*[A knife is raised to the pig. It squeals.]*

**Hawkodile:** What...?! You can't kill him if he's wearing people clothes!

*[The song* Happy Together *plays and Hawkodile imagines his life with the pig.]*

**Hawkodile:** You're coming home with me.

*[In the kitchen Bittersweet plays* Baby Blast*.]*

**Dr. Fox:** *A thousand eyes.* What could that be?

**Richard:** I'm pretty sure a thousand is a number.

*[Hawkodile comes in and shows after a while the pig. Dr. Fox looks at the words as she wrote down as Richard said in the church.]*

**Hawkodile:** Hey, Dr. Fox Isn't it great being married to someone who's recklessly impulsive?

**Dr. Fox:** Actually, it's aged me horribly.

**Hawkodile:** Then say hello to the newest pet.

**Dr. Fox:** Hawkodile! I believe what happened in church was a warning about precisely this. Please, get rid of that pig.

**Hawkodile:** Oh, you're gonna love him. Look, he does an impression of you.

*[The Pig screams.]*

**Hawkodile:** You nailed her. He also does me.

*[Dr. Fox laughing.]*

**Hawkodile:** You smiled. I'm off the hook.

*[Hawkodile is in Puppycorn's room and chambers the pig's hair, outside are Puppycorn and looking on them.]*

**Hawkodile:** Oh, you have so many looks.

*[Puppycorn sighs and she Dino Dude put to sleep his children.]*

**Puppycorn:** So that's what snug is.

**Hawkodile:** Who's a good pig?

*[Hawkodile makes fart sounds on the pig's stomach.]*

**Hawkodile:** Who's a good pig?

*[Puppycorn is aiming his slingshot against Hawkodile, but stops when he hears Dino Dude some are by the window.]*

**Dino Dude:** Rough day, huh, son?

**Puppycorn:** You don't know what rough is, sister.

**Dino Dude:** Puppycorn, you know, whenever my boys bake up a batch of frownies I take them fishing. Does your bodyguard ever take you fishing?

*[Puppycorn thinks of when he was fishing with Hawkodile.]*

**Puppycorn:** Hawkodile, it's not fair to use a bug zapper to catch the fish.

**Hawkodile:** If you love fish like I do, you want them to die with dignity.

*[Hawkodile* *stops an electrician fly trap in the water and the fish float to the surface.]*

**Hawkodile:** I think I have a nibble. [eats a fish then gets electrocuted]

**Puppycorn:** I think fishing might be more fun with you.

**Dino Dude:** Oh, great. Now, how about I fix you some cocoa?

**Puppycorn:** No way. Cocoa's for wusses.

**Dino Dude:** Well, sir, if you change your mind, it's on the windowsill.

*[When Dino Dude went off takes Puppycorn the mug with cocoa that Dino Dude did and eats it in the garden.]*

**Puppycorn:** Oh, my God.

*[Unikitty cleans the floor in the hallway and then sees that it is dirty on the ceiling.]*

**Dr. Fox:** Oh, wait. I didn't tell you the best part. He loves the environment. Oh, wait! I still didn't tell you the best part. He's got an Irish brogue. No, no, wait! I still didn't tell you the best part. He's not imaginary!

**Unikitty:** Of course! And the very best thing is that he listens to everyone in the Unikingdom!

Richard: [flies in] Princess, maybe you should get rid of more of the pig tracks.

Dr. Fox: Wait. Why are there pig tracks on the ceiling?

*[Hawkodile let the pig go in the ceiling.]*

**Hawkodile:** Spider-Pig. Spider-Pig. Does whatever a Spider-Pig does. Can he swing from a web? No. he can't. he's a pig Look out. He is the Spider-Pig.

*[Puppycorn and Dino Dude are fishing.]*

**Puppycorn:** Are we having fun yet?

**Dino Dude:** We are now. You've got a bite.

**Puppycorn:** Whoa, mama!

*[Puppycorn drops the pole and Puppycorn begins to strangle himself.]*

**Dino Dude:** Oh, no, my good pole!