Nervous Ned

Ah, this SHRIEK'S GORE-RY GORE-MET is one that you CHILLING-CHILDREN are sure to WEREWOLF DOWN hee-hee-hee. Have a HELPING OF HORROR that I call...

It was back in the Summer of 1971, when a middle-aged man drove down a road through some forest down in Kentucky one night. He turned on his car radio and "Monday Monday" By The Mamas & The Papas began to play on it. "What a perfect song for a Monday ha-ha!" the man said to himself and snickered. "Oh boy. That news in the paper this mornin' was mighty frightenin' indeed. A psychopath on the loose 'round these here parts geez" he said to himself, nervously. There was a man with a knife on the side of the road up, ahead of him and he stopped his car. The man put his knife in his pocket then and the middle-aged man rolled down his window on the passenger's side. "Evenin' stranger, y'all know there's a reported psychopath in these here parts" the middle age man said to the guy. "Howdy, mister, yeah I've been fixin' to get back home 'cause of that" he responded. "I'd be happy to give you a ride" the middle-aged man said, offering. "Thank y'all mister!" the man responded and got in the car. "My name's Ned sir. Who might you be?" the middle-aged man introduced himself as, then asked. "Ned, howdy, I'm Floyd" the man said, introducing himself to Ned as, and they shook hands. "Pleasure to meet ya, Floyd" Ned told him, and drove on.

"The paper this mornin' claimed this psychopath wrecked a robber's home last night" Ned told Floyd. "Yeah, I was out of town at the time, Ned. I was pretty shocked of course when I saw the photograph today" Floyd said to him then. Ned turned off his car-radio then, driving out of the woods. There was a general store on the left-hand-side of the road and Ned parked his car out in front of it. He and Floyd got out of the car. "Excuse me, Floyd, I'm mighty nervous with that psychopath runnin' 'round, so, I'm gonna buy a drink!" Ned said to him. "Sure Ned. I'm gonna buy one two sir" Floyd responded and went into the store. Ned paced back and forth by his car, nervously. The moon become full then. "Oh no. A full moon. A psychopath is on the loose somewhere nearby. I fixin' to be sick!" Ned told himself, looking up, at the orange full moon. Floyd ran out of the store with a bottle of Jack Daniel's Whiskey and a bag in one hand, and his knife in his other hand. He ran to Ned's vehicle, shouting: "GIVE ME YOUR CAR NED OR I'LL KILL YOU!!".

A bright-red-furry-clawed-hand came gliding through the air, as deep roaring was heard, striking Floyd's chest and ripping jagged holes in his shirt in the shape of claw marks. It was a werewolf with bright-red fur, peering at him with white-shining eyes. Floyd attempted to stab it, but the beast knocked the knife out of his hand with its clawed-hand and then attacked him, sinking its long fangs into his forehead. Floyd screamed in pain and terror, slumping over dead then. The monster let out a high howl to, looking up, at the full-moon, and gnawed on Floyd's dead body in the shadows, ferociously. The werewolf's long claws flew up and down, as the sounds of ripping clothes and flesh were heard. A couple of minutes later, a police car showed up and two cops got out of it. They spotted the monster chewing on something in the shadows and fired their guns at it. The werewolf roared lowly at them, running off with a human-skull in its clawed-hands into the forest. The cops ran over to Ned's car and both shined their flashlights down on the skeleton of Floyd. "DANG, THAT THING HAD QUITE A MEAL, SAM!!!" one of the cops screamed to the second. "BOY, HOWDY, YOU GOT THAT RIGHT JAMES!" Sam screamed back to him in complete terror.

A cloud partially-covered the full moon. A few minutes later, Ned stood in the store with Sam and James. "So the psychopath wasn't Floyd Officers?" an old man behind the counter, said, asking the cops. "Yes, Mr. Hopewell sir. It was somethin' else" Sam answered. "I saw a red werewolf out the window of my general store here" Mr. Hopewell said to him. "Yes sir Mr. Hopewell. That's what it was" Sam said. "A werewolf what in tarnation!!" Ned said, nervously. Ned walked out to his car, and drank a bottle of Jack Daniel's Whiskey. He finished the bottle of it, through it away in a dumpster, and got in his vehicle. He drove away. As Ned turned a corner in his car up the road, the moon grew full. Ned transformed into the red furry werewolf in a split second, blinked his glowing-white eyes and howled eerily.

Well, HOWL WAS THAT for an ending kiddies? Ned was sure nervous about that psychopath even though he was the culprit. He sure BEASTED HIM in the newspapers aha-ha-ha-ha. He had no idea what kind of news the cops had IN STORE for Mr. Hopewell...IN MR. HOPEWELL'S STORE that is heh-heh-heh-heh-heh!