recursal/Fanatic-Fandom huggingface dataset:
Mariscos

**Mariscos** is a Spanish seaside resort located somewhere in Spain, possibly on the southern border with the Mediterranean. It apparently is a huge tourist spot among English travelers.

Jack Wright takes his vacation here on a break from The Benny Hill Show. Taking the 49£ rate to save money, he experiences the economy version over the more extravagant 50£ rate by a fellow tourist (Bob Todd). The trip is arranged by a ticket agent (Benny Hill) who tries talking him out of the cheaper rate with zero results. The bus to the airfield is through Duffo Tours whose bus leaves behind one of his suitcases and needs to be pushed by the passengers when it breaks down. The plane to Mariscos is on an old 40s-era biplane with a nearly blind pilot (Benny Hill), a surly masculine stewardess (Bob Todd) who feeds them from a pail and a partying crew with stewardesses (Helli Louise and Sue Bond) dressed like Playboy bunnies. The co-pilot (Henry McGee) and navigator (Benny Hill) get drunk and chase them up and down the aisle of the plane

On arrival, Jackie learns the hotel is under heavy renovation, and his room doesn't have a closet. The crude sounds from his beach ball earn him the ire of a local magistrate (Benny Hill) who follows him around the beach. When Jackie can't find a place to change, he tries changing by the hotel pool but gets reprimanded only after changing rooms become available. In the hotel restaurant, Jackie is served by a distracted waiter (Benny Hill) who puts wine in his dish and souffle in his glass. When the crude sounds of his beach ball get him arrested, Jackie gets stuck in jail with another prisoner (Benny Hill) who steals his gruel.

Because of his jail sentence delaying his trip back, Jackie has to rent a bicycle to get home, but when he gets a flat, the crude sounds from his inner tube get him arrested again.

## Trivia

* Benny introduces the sketch as a vacation for Jackie in the body of the episode rather than as a following sketch.
* Benny has seven roles in this sketch.
* Bob Todd has three roles in this sketch.
* Sue Bond is the Benny Tours stewardess in the expensive tour package. Cheryl Gilham and Helli Louise play customers.
* The Duffo Tours customers joining Jackie are Walter Goodman, Pat Ashton, Cheryl Gilham Helli Louise. Connie Georges, Henry McGee and possibly Sue Bond.
* Sue Bond, Laraine Humphrys, Cheryl Gilham and Helli Louise are the ladies in the changing rooms catching Jackie changing in public. Pat Ashton slips out second before.
* Sue Bond reveals her posterior in the scene where the doors fall off the changing rooms.
* Bob Todd and Bella Emberg are in the back of the bus as Jackie races after it. Wally Goodman is the local with the bicycle.
* "Mariscos" is the Spanish word for "seafood."

## Gallery

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Jan Butlin

**Jan Butlin** was an English writer and actress, known for the movies, "Life Begins at Forty," "Just Jimmy" and "Horne A'Plenty."

Butlin was born on February 16, 1940 in Wanstead, England. Her television career includes credits for the series "The Avengers," "Crossroads," "Public Eye," "Detective" and "Parkin's Patch" before starring in Benny Hill's short film, "Waiters." She also played the widow in the Ernie" video he made for the "Top of the Pops" on the BBC and later turned up in sketches for the first season of his series for Thames Television, playing the wife of Jackie Wright in "Tribute to the Lower Tidmarsh Volunteer Hospital Service" sketch on November 19, 1969. She went on to work as a writer, writing episodes for the British TV shows, "Just Jimmy," "Life Begins at Forty," "That Beryl Marston," "Third Time Lucky," "Hell's Bells" and "No Strings," as well as "Horne A'Plenty" with Kenneth Horne, Terry Jones and Michael Palin and the BBC series, "According to Dora," with Dora Bryan and Eric Idle, all of whom were alumni of the "Monty Python" TV series. She passed away on February 10, 1998 in Devon, England.

## Episode(s)

* The European Song Contest
* The Underworld Water of Jacques Custard
* Opportunity's Knocking

## Gallery

* Jan Butlin with Michael Sharvell Martin, Ken Parry and Benny Hill
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George Roderick

**George Roderick** is a veteran English comedy character known for over a hundred appearances in both film and television. He was born in 1913, but there are no details available about his life and career. Most of his early appearances on film are uncredited until he played Joe Trimmer in the TV series "Starr and Company" in 1958, followed by more appearances in "The Widow of Bath," "The Men from Room 13" and "The Larkins" amongst other shows, including "The Love of Mike," "The Great Moroni" and "Three Live Wires." His film career also includes the movies "Three Live Wires," "Eddie in August" with Benny Hill and "Escape from the Iron Curtain." He also played a football player and a wino in a 1971 episode of "The Benny Hill Show." He passed away on March 10, 1976.
Kenneth Carter

**Kenneth Carter** is a English television producer known for his work on several British TV series through the 1950s including "Before Your Very Eyes," "Hit Parade," "Showcase" and "The Benny Hill Show" for the BBC.

Not much is known about his life. He served in the Royal Artillery during World War II as a Lance Bombardier. He also produced a show for a Royal Artillery Concert Party which Spike Milligan and his band attended. He also served as a judge for the show, later working in television as a director and producer. His other work includes "Nixon at Nine-Five," "The Norman Vaughan Show" and "The Lance Percival Show." He also directed episodes of "Hit Parade" and "Cross Roads" and worked with Reg Varney, Frankie Howard, Tony Hancock, Lance Percival and Norman Vaughan.
He passed away in 1978.

## Episode(s)

* January 15, 1955
* February 12, 1955
* March 12, 1955
* November 6, 1964
* April 3, 1965
* April 24, 1965
* Police: Friend or Foe?
* May 22, 1965
* Opportunity Calls
* November 27, 1965
* December 18, 1965
* The Laddyboys: Tex Cymbal
* December 11, 1968
Helen Carpenter

**Helen Carpenter** is an English actress, dancer, choreographer and fitness expert. She studied competitive gymnastics, professional dance and choreography, winning awards as a multiple aerobics champion in the UK, European and world games and as a competitive gymnast, later working in theater, television and movies in uncredited roles. She was also one of the Hill's Angels on "The Benny Hill Show," first appearing in the 1988 season and staying through to the Benny Hill's World Tour: New York special in 1990. After the show ended, she became an aerobics and fitness expert and choreographer, teaching various courses in dance and music. She also founded the UK Fitness Academy and DYBO Academy. She was also a F.I.G. four times undefeated UK Mixed Pairs Sports Aerobics Champion and has represented the United Kingdom in competitions across the world, gaining silver medals twice in Holland, France and Sweden, her most significant placing being a Bronze medal at the 1997 World Games. Now married, she now goes by Helen Carpenter-Waters.

## Episode(s)

* The Halitosis Kid (uncredited) as a Hill's Angels
* Club Chicago-Go (uncredited) as a Hill's Angels
* The Crook Report (uncredited) as a Hill's Angels
* Holding Out for a Hero (uncredited) as a Hill's Angels
* Pepy's Diary (uncredited) as a Hill's Angels
* Benny Hill's World Tour: New York (uncredited) as a Hill's Angels

## Gallery

* Helen and an Unidentified Angel
* Helen today
* Debi Gaye, Sue Upton, Benny, Anna, Helen
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Humor in Uniform and Religion

## Production

**Episode:** 12

**Date:** March 30, 1972

**Producer:** Peter Whitmore

**Director:**

**Writer:** Dave Allen, Austin Steele and Peter Vincent

## Cast

* Dave Allen
* Ronnie Brody
* Jacqueline Clarke
* Michael Sharvell-Martin
* Peter Hawkins
* Simon Barnes

## Quotes

* **Dave Allen** - "My sense of humor is set around sex, drugs, living, death and the English; so if you know a story about a British priest who lived and died, please tell me about it."
* **Dave Allen** - "The one place women are not truly emancipated in any way is within the church of Rome. Women are not allowed to participate in any way with the church or confessions. Thank God! Can you imagine a nun taking confession?" (introducing the nun in the confessional sketch)

## Trivia

* In going with the nagging wife sketch in this episode, Ronnie Brody plays the majority of the hen-pecked husbands in this series
* Michael Sharvell-Martin plays Joshua and the man from the Guinness Book of World Records who confronts Jacqueline Clarke.
* The character of James the Trusty Butler who was revealed as having died in a first season sketch returns in this episode as having finally reached the gates of heaven.
* Dave Allen portrays James Bond, a recurring movie character seen first in Dr. No (1963)

## Sequence

* **Last Episode:** Dave on Cinema 2
* **Next Episode:** Bond, Holmes and Watson
Hott Sexxe, Free Loofa und Lust Orgie

## Bio

**Hott Sexe, Free Loofa und Lust Orgie** ("A Summer Romance") is a Scandinavian film about a lonely Norweigen bride named Greta (Lorraine Doyle) who has an affair with Nils, her husband's golf instructor (Jon Jon Keefe).

In the opener, the husband, Bjorn (Benny Hill), confides in his best friend Hans (Henry McGee) about all the troubles in his life as sub-titles translate. His wife Greta sees them off to the golf tournament, but once they're gone, she rips off her old robe, runs to the bedroom and whistles for her lover (Jon Jon Keefe) who climbs in through the window of her bedroom. Having told his own wife he has gone fishing, Nils and Greta are immediately stripping off their clothes with strategically placed sub-titles hiding their nudity and faraway shots masking their illicit activity.

In time, Bjorn returns home and catches the two lovers in bed, but he barely notices because he has lost the tournament by one stroke!

## Trivia

* William Brown of "Benny's Place" calls this sketch "a brilliant send-up of Scandinavian adult films."
* Benny also skewered adult films in Naked Lust in Sinful Sweden.
* This sketch along with Cross-Strassen Motel was one of two "European Television" sketches.
* A photo of Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher appears in the sketch; she also appears as a puppet in the Westminster Follies.
* Nils's wife is named Helga in passing.

## Gallery

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Flying South For The Summer

## Bio

**Flying Home For The Summer** is a song performed by Benny Hill on January 27, 1971. It was performed on stage without vocalization from The Ladybirds.

## Lyrics

Now, one day I saw in Jerona by a river so quiet and remote,

Eight lovely girls from the college, they were all in the same boat.

And as they rode in unison by me, I gallantly raised my hat,

And I said with a sigh, "I wish that I could stroke a crew just like that."

Oh, but I'm flying south for the summer, I'm gonna follow the sun,

I'm flying south for the summer now the mating season's begun.

Now, outside a bar in Toledo, Marie had more than her fill

A man outside stood outside roasting a chicken on a flaming red hot grill

Now, she staggered up to him in a voice like a town crier,

"Senor Burro, your organ is broken, and your monkey is on fire."

Oh, I'm flying south for the summer, I'm gonna follow the sun,

Oh, I'm flying south for the summer now the mating season's begun.

Big Annie from Brighton once ordered a steak weighing nine and a quarter pound,

The butcher said, "Will you take it, ma'am, or shall I send it 'round?"

She said, "No, I just wanna look at it because I've been dieting like a chump,"

"And that's what I've lost and I just wanna see what it looks like in one lump."

Oh, But I'm flying south for the summer, I'm gonna follow the sun,

Oh I'm flying south for the summer, now the mating season's begun.

With Melina, I stood on a bus from Marfe, we were hanging on tight by the strap,

When she let her pretty white hankie fall on a sleeping old gentleman's lap.

Now, when he awoke from his slumber he saw everyone staring at him,

And thinking it was his shirt tail, he slyly tucked it in.

Oh, I'm flying south for the summer, I'm gonna follow the sun,

Oh, I'm flying south for the summer now the mating season's begun.....
John Vyvyan

**Johnny Vyvyan** was an English-Australian actor comedian possibly best known for his appearances on "The Benny Hill Show."

Vyvyan was born in Bogibri, Australia in 1929. His first appearance as an actor was in the TV movie "Trial Gallop," later appearing on "Son of Fred" and "The Harry Secombe Show" before first working with Benny Hill on the BBC. He also appeared on Benny's short-lived anthology series and years later was considered as a possible replacement for Jackie Wright on Thames Television.

His other work includes the TV shows "Hancock's Half Hour," "The Avengers," "Our House," "It's Your Move" and Monty Python's "The Complete and Utter History of Britain." He also worked with comedians Bob Monkhouse and Des O'Connor.

He passed away on September 3, 1984 in his home in Godalming, Surrey, England. Ironically, his home was later acquired by actor Terry-Thomas of "Those Magnificent Men in Their Flying Machines" and "It's A Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World" fame. Ironically, Terry-Thomas would pass away in the house himself in 1990.

## Episode(s)

* Saturday Comedy Hour (BBC)
* Portrait of a Bridegroom (BBC)
* The South Blank Show (Thames TV) - uncredited
* Friday Night Fever (Thames TV)
* Leprechaun TV: Opening Night (Thames TV)
* The Police Raid in Waterloo Station (Thames TV)

## Gallery

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Michael Moore

**Michael Moore** was an English actor whose career covers most of the Sixties and Seventies, mostly in supporting roles and uncredited bit parts. His earliest roles were in the movies "Stranger at My Door," "Chelsea Story," "Murder at Scotland Yard," "Babes in the Wood," "Othello," "Booby Trap" and "Assignment Redhead" as well as roles in the TV series "Armchair Theatre," "The BBC Sunday-Night Theatre" and "Dial 999." He appeared several times on the TV series "Charlie Drake" and "Doctor Who." He appeared on "The Benny Hill Show" in 1969 and 1972, receiving a credit for his repeated sketches in The Best of Benny Hill. He also had roles in "Upstairs, Downstairs" and "War & Peace" before appearing uncredited several times in the TV series, "Dad's Army." He passed away on March 24, 1979.

He is not to be confused with the American director and producer with the same name.

## Episode(s)

* Is This Your Life
* Woodstick
Husky and Starch

## Bio

**Husky and Starch** are two American police detectives, possibly in New York City, who learn that the governor's daughter has been kidnapped. To find her, Starch visits an informant named Huggy Bear (Jackie Wright) who tells him that the girl has been kidnapped by an extremist named Slimy Sally. Husky tracks her down to her hide-out near the wharf where Starch is briefly distracted by Husky getting trapped in "freeze frames," a thing common with famous TV detectives. Starch orders Sally to give herself up and toss down her guns, but he gets trapped under her cannon getting thrown out. Meanwhile, Husky slips inside and confronts Slimy Sally, shooting the woman (Rita Webb) who confronts him and sending her out the window. At that point, the real Slimy Sally (Lorraine Doyle) turns around and introduces herself. Realizing he's shot the wrong woman, Husky curses himself as everything goes into "freeze frame."

## Trivia

* Husky and Starch were both played by Benny Hill. He actually uses the character's real names in the sketch.
* This sketch was based on "Starsky and Hutch," a popular American TV crime drama from ABC-TV. It starred actors Paul Michael Glaser and David Soul.

## Category

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H.M. Prison Teddington

## History

**Her Majesty's Prison Teddington** is a royal prison in the small town of Teddington, a town within the northwest of Greater London. It suffers an escape when one of its prisoners (Benny Hill) escapes. When a rope dangled over the wall for him falls to the ground, he grabs a pick axe and breaks through the wall, running into two guards (Brian Nolan and Robert Howe) who rip him prison uniform off while trying to restrain him. Running around in his underwear, the inmate rips into a box from a costume shop left at a door by a deliveryman (Brian Nolan), ultimately turning down the ballerina dress and inmate costume in it.

Ultimately, he steals the women's clothes from the laundry line of a local housewife (Pamela Cundell). Astonishingly, the officer's don't recognize him as a lady and chase him with amorous intentions, forcing him to shed the clothes and run off in his underwear. The officers don't recognize him as he sprints past them as a man.

Forced to shed his female costume, the inmate runs loose through the area again before getting the attention of two affectionate lady cops (Lesley Goldie and Penny Meredith), who thinks he's cute, driving him to try breaking into prison again.

## Trivia

* The Escaped Prisoner was played by [[Benny Hill].
* If one looks closely at the bricks Benny is chopping through, it looks as if they might be made of styrofoam.
* The chase scene looks as if it might have been filmed along the street from the studio where Benny filmed the show.
* The retailer on the box of clothes is "Robins Fancy Dress."

## Gallery

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Naked Lust in Sinful Sweden

## Bio

**Naked Lust In Sinful Sweden** is a Scandinavian adult film about a lonely Swedish youth (Benny Hill) with a creative way to meet girls. When a local girl named Bo Peep (Malou Cartwright) gets lost in the woods near his cabin, he invites her into his cabin, but when she asks for his help, he points to a tinted window that makes it look like it's about to rain. Convincing her they have to find something else to do while it rains, he kicks the door shut (in the face of one of the missing sheep) and takes her to his bed, but she's hardly protesting as this is happening.

A short time later, Bo Peep's sister (Andree Melly) shows up looking for her, and he pulls the same trick on her. They both also jump into his bed with her just as excited as he is.

In time, Bo Peep's mother (Bella Emberg) shows up looking for her daughters, but she's obviously up to the young man's tricks. Entering his cottage, she sees the tinted window and tries pulling his own trick on him. As she offers to stay inside as it rains, he's both confused and dismayed. As she starts tugging off her clothing, he pulls out an umbrella to go searching for the sheep in the rain.

## Trivia

* This was one of five sketches based on "Bo Peep" along with Sure Taylor, Nathan Wylde, Ironsides and "Much Ado About Bo Peep" with Benny in a Shakespearean playlet. The bit was introduced by Leslie Goldie. Henry McGee introduced similar sketches with "Jack And Jill" in Jack and Jill.
* Benny followed this up with another satire on adult films with Hott Sexxe, Free Loofa und Lust Orgie on March 31, 1986.
* This sketch possibly ranks as one of Benny's top remembered sketches; it was not included in any of the early HBO video collections.

## Gallery

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Jose's Cantina

## Bio

**Jose's Cantina** was the closing act of October 14, 1970. It was performed by Benny Hill, accompanied by Two's Company and Los Zafiros in a cantina-like setting on stage.

## Lyrics

I met you in Jose's Cantina.

Oh, you looked so lonesome and sad.

So, I said with a wink, "Let me buy you a drink, and maybe things won't seem so bad."

You ordered a large champagne cocktail then vodka and wine from Verona.

And as I bought it I suddenly thought, "It's no wonder that you're on your own."

But by then, I had fallen in love, but you laughed at the way that I felt.

With your black cowboy boots and your cowgirl-type suit, and your hop-along chastity belt.

You took me across town to your place.

My eagerness I could not hide.

As you walked across the floor and you locked the front door,

Why did you leave me outside?

So I went to my Uncle Hernando, saying, "My heart is filled with desire.

"But the lady says no, and all the waters that flow from the mountains can't put out the fire."

He said, "When a lady says no, she sometimes means yes, you young hothead."

I said, "That may be so, but she didn't say no," She simply said, "Go and get knotted."

So I came here and I sang 'neath your window, from midnight 'til dawn, half past three.

Oh, tell me, sweet lady, sweet lady, pray tell me,

What was it you emptied on me?

I came here to old Barcelona,

To pick the sweetheart of my life,

And I gave you my heart, but we drifted apart,

So I'm going back to the wife.

Olé!

## Episode(s)

* The Underworld Water Of Jacques Custard
Monika Ringwald

**Monica Ringwald** is an English-German actress possibly best known for her bit roles in many British sexploitation movies. Her only lead role was in "The Sexplorer" in 1975.

Not much is known about her life and career, which was covered by numerous pseudonyms, including Marilyn Rickard, Marylyn Rickard, Monica Ringwald, Monica Ringwood and June Rutherford. She was possibly born Marilyn Rickard, but this is confirmed. She started out as a nude model, appearing in British magazines such as "Health and Efficiency" and "Witchcraft" amongst others before appearing in an uncredited role in the 1967 James Bond spoof "Casino Royale" with Peter Sellers, David Niven and Woody Allen. She starred in a string of sexploitation movies afterward, first starring on "The Benny Hill Show" in 1971, playing a woman on an elevator, a passenger on the S.S. Rumpo and the girl chased by Benny Hill in the tag on November 24, 1971. She returned to star on the show three more times, appearing in the "Shopping Center" and "El Paso" sketches on December 17, 1975, as one of two maids with Jenny Westbrook in "Domestic Bliss" on March 24, 1976 and possibly as late as May 27, 1985, all credited as Monica Ringwald. She retired from acting in 1978.

## Episode(s)

* Fun in the Kitchen with Johnny and Cranny Faddock (as Marilyn Rickard)
* Jack and Jill
* Murder on the Oregon Express
* Carmen

## Gallery

* Mia, Benny and Monika as Marilyn RickardGo to Mia Marton
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Liz Fraser

**Liz Fraser** is a BAFTA-nominated English actress, best known for her comedy roles as a provocative "dumb blonde" in British films of the 1950s, 1960s and 1970s, such as "The Americanization of Emily," "I'm All Right Jack" and "Carry on Cruising."

Born Elizabeth Joan Winch on August 14, 1930 in Southwark, England, although some sources give her birth year as 1933, she was the daughter of travelling salesman for a brewery and a female shop-keeper off New Kent Road. She had an older half-brother, Philip, from her mother's first marriage. They moved to Westerham and later to Chudleigh during World War Two. Her father passed away at the age of 40 in 1942 when she was 11.

Attending St Saviour's and St Olave's Grammar School for Girls, she later attended Goldsmiths College where she studied drama. She also attended the City of London College for Commerce, Book-Keeping, Shorthand and Typing, later winning an evening scholarship to the London School of Dramatic Art.

During her career, Fraser starred in several British films and television series, including the films, "Hancock's Half Hour" and "Last of the Summer Wine" as well as episodes of "Shadow Squad" and "Whack-O." She was also a semi-regular performer on "The Benny Hill Show" during its years at the BBC in the Fifties, later returning for one episode at Thames TV in 1970. Her later TV work includes appearances in "Hancock's Half Hour," "Citizen James," "The Avengers," "The Bill," "Foyle's War," "Birds of a Feather," "Minder," "Holby City" "Shroud for a Nightingale," "Fairly Secret Army" and "Agatha Christie's Miss Marple: Nemesis." Credited as Elizabeth Frazer early in her career, her film appearances include "Touch and Go," "The Smallest Show on Earth" with Peter Sellers, "I'm All Right, Jack," "Two-Way Stretch," "The Bulldog Breed," "Double Bunk," The Painted Smile," "The Americanization of Emily," "The Family Way" and "Dad's Army" as well as a string of sex comedies and four of the "Carry On" films.
Married twice in her life, Fraser was once married to Peter Yonwin, a travelling salesman, who she later divorced. in November 1958 but the marriage soon broke down and they divorced. Her second husband, Bill Hitchcock, was a TV director for the TV shows, "Albert!" and "Turnbull's Finest Half-Hour," which Fraser both appeared in. This marriage must have been slightly more successful. They were still married when Hitchcock passed away from a pulmonary embolism on February 1974 at the age of 45.

Fraser has also been a prolific worker for charities and a patron of the London Repertory Company.
Lisa Mulidore

**Lisa Mulidore** is an English actress and dancer who starred as one of the Hill's Angels on "The Benny Hill Show." Her parents are jazz musician Jimmy Mulidore and actress Aimi MacDonald.

For two years, Mulidore was a member of Dougie Squires' Second Generation dance group, later appearing in theater in the musical, "The Matchgirls," a national tour of "Grease" and "Noises Off" at the Savoy Theatre in the West End. She also appeared in the farce, "A Bit On the Side" at the Gaiety Theatre on the Isle of Man and at the Richmond Theatre. In addition, she appeared in pantomime in "Aladdin" and "Mother Goose."

Mulidore eventually graduated to television starred in a pilot called "Happy Girl," later appearing in an episode of the crime drama series, "King and Castle," for Thames Television. She later served as hostess on Thames Television's long-running game show, "Whose Baby?," later working alongside comedian, Bernie Winters before getting invited by Benny Hill to appear on "The Benny Hill Show." Starring in the 1984 season, she appears as the doorman and the dancer wearing the German military helmet during Louise English's "Milord" number at the end of the "Club Bizarre" routine in the January 16, 1984 show. She also starred in the movies, "Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom" and "The Wicked Lady."

Mulidore later left showbiz to raise her children, but, currently, she now runs her own public-relations business, Lisa Mulidore PR, in London. One of her PR clients is none other than her own mother, Aimi MacDonald.
Little Dimpton Hospital

## Bio

**Little Dimpton Hospital** is a mental facility and old-folks hospital in or near Little Dimpton. The grounds are full of nurses rolling patients around and a typo in the sign on property reads "congealed entrance."

While walking the grounds of the hospital with his dog, a man (Benny Hill) calls upon his dog to heel, but the power and repeated passion of his voice calls for all the old-timers to be "healed." The feat causes the nurses and patients to chase after him to punish him for putting them out of work or thank him, all but three (Len Keyes, Bob Todd and Sydney Arnold), who are too winded to keep up with the rest.

Chased by six nurses (unidentified) and three patients (likely Henry McGee, Jon Jon Keefe and Mike Mulloy), the figure darts back into the hospital and steals a BMX bike, pulling tricks and stunts ahead of his pursuers. He dances up and down stairs on it, jumps a bench, rides on his handlebars and does u-turns off the trees. As he looks back to see how far he is, he fails to notice the tree coming up on him, and he smacks so hard into it that he emerges an angel in the afterlife on the other side.

## Trivia

* No names were given for the characters or locations in this sketch. However, Little Dimpton was being referenced in nearly all the sketches of this time, even in the Joe Titmarsh sketch.
* The grounds of the London Freeman's School serve as the hospital exterior and grounds; it also served as an extreme close-up of the Kirkdale Mansion in The Herd.
* During the trick stunts, Benny and the cast pass the same house from Rembrandt and The Bucket.
* The names of the actresses playing the nurses chasing Benny are unrevealed, but it is possible they are Samantha Spencer-Lane, Tracy Smith, Allison Thomas, Fiona Baker, Emma Bryant and Katie Randall.
* According to William Brown of "Benny's Place," this was the last show was to feature the classic Thames logo opening.
* This was the final sketch for Len Keyes in the series.

## Gallery

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Ian Kaye

**Ian Kaye** is an English actor, dancer and choreographer who has appeared in movie and television, notably in the films, "Summer Holiday" and "Kiss Me Kate," and the short, "The Hairy Fairy." His early television appearances include the variety shows, "Jack Hylton's Monday Show," "The Mike and Bernie show" and "The Friday Show," later getting roles in the movies "I'll Be Seeing You," "Summer Holiday" and "Kiss Me Kate." He was also one of the Great British Dancing Finals dancers on the December 27, 1973 episode of "The Benny hill Show." His most recent credit was "The Hairy Fairy."

Sadly, Kaye died suddenly and unexpectedly after a hip replacement operation on October 28, 2007. He was 77.
Herbert Chaney

## Bio

**Herbert Chaney** is a businessman who works somewhere in England (possibly London). One of his associates on his floor goes by the initials G.W.

Although Chaney never appears, two of his employees have a conversation outside his office. Unfortunately, the conversation is very misogynistic with the male employee (Benny Hill) propositioning a pretty young secretary (Louise English). After his come-ons get even more pathetic, she reveals she has been hired to cut all unneccessary employees to the company or find out "who has been made redundant."

At this point, the male employee starts back-pedaling on his insinuations and trying to reverse his damage to his reputation, but he only keeps digging himself deeper in trouble. As he keeps talking, he starts shrinking and getting smaller until the young woman finally steps on and crushes him with her shoe, even grinding him into the carpet.

## Trivia

* This sketch might be considered part of the Barcland Bank quickies that started on March 16, 1983.

## Gallery

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Gay Caballero

## Bio

The **Gay Caballero** an American gunslinger and outlaw from near El Paso well-known for his pink outfit, white horse and effeminate lifestyle. He makes his own clothes on a brand new sewing machine; his shirt made from pink satin. He drinks beer with cherries and pineapple and a straw and feeds his horse with a leather bag from Harrods. His fighting style includes guns and sand thrown to blind his rivals.

The Caballero is a partner to the outlaw Thunderclap, and helps him to obtain and abduct Lucky Lulu Belle (Lorraine Doyle), the girlfriend of the Halitosis Kid. After a gunfight at the saloon, they pursue them upstairs. As the Caballero peeks through keyholes looking for him, the Kid blasts him with his breath, knocking him out with his breath, but the Caballero quickly come to and hits the kid with sand, blinding him in order to abduct Lulu Bell.

Pursued by the Kid, the Caballero soon gets the jump of the Kid and tapes his mouth shut, basically neutralizing his breath. He and Thunderclap take him hostage, but, unfortunately, they don't known his body odor is even worse, and when the Kid puts his arms up in defeat, both Thunderclap and the Caballero pass out from the smell. Once he's defeated, the Kid and Lulu Belle successfully escape to town.

## Trivia

* The Gay Caballero was played by Jon Jon Keefe.
* In his book, "I Was Benny Hill's Boy Toy," Jon Jon describes that behind the scenes the crew making jokes about his pink costume.
* Benny also sings The Gay Caballero on March 16, 1983.

## Gallery

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Guillermo Basilisco

**Guillermo Basilisco** is an actor and flamenco guitarist. Not much of his career is known. He accompanied Benny Hill and Diana Darvey during the "Mexican medley" in the 1974 Coal Pits episodes. Credited as William Basilisco, he played a guitarist in an episode of the British series "From a Bird's Eye View." He received a credit for the theme, "Zorongo," in "So You Think You Can Dance" in 2005.
Forever Love

## Production

**Episode:** 50

**Date:** April 8, 1985

**Time:** 51:17

**Musical Director:** Ronnie Aldrich

**Vocals:** The Ladybirds

**Choreography:** Libby Roberts

**Producer:** Dennis Kirkland

**Director:** Dennis Kirkland

**Writer:** Benny Hill

## Episode

* Quickies - 3
	+ The Fortune Teller
* Ballad - What A World
* Bill Posters
* Quickies - 3
* Forever Love
* The Feminine Dictionary
* Hill's Angels: The Oddball Club Cabaret
* Fred Scuttle: Independent Cinema
* Tag: "Hullo, Sailor!"

## Highlights

* Benny warps the English Language with his "Feminine Dictionary"

## Cast

* Benny Hill
* Henry McGee
* Bob Todd
* Jon Jon Keefe
* Louise English
* Sue Upton
* Jenny Lee-Wright
* Len Keyes
* Nicola Bacon - Hill's Angel (uncredited)
* Lorraine Doyle - Hill's Angel (uncredited)
* Alison Thomas - Hill's Angel (uncredited)
* Helen Tozer - Hill's Angel (uncredited)
* Laura Wynne - Hill's Angel (uncredited)
* Emma Bryant - Hill's Angel (uncredited)

## Trivia

* James Gaulstone (played by Benny Hill in the "Forever Love" parody of mail order record ads) is a play on the name of Irish flautist James Galway, who had recorded an instrumental version of John Denver's "Annie's Song" in 1978.
* The "Charlesworth House" reference at the end of the ad parody was an in-joke reference to theatrical agent Peter Charlesworth, whose clients included such Hill players as Bob Todd and Louise English.
* This episode appears on the "Golden Grins" VHS.

## Sequence

* **Last Episode:** The B-Team
* **Next Episode:** Carmen
Lover Come Back To Me

## Bio

**Lover Come Back to Me** is a comedy duet performed by Benny Hill and Pat Ashton. The song is based on the version composed by Sigmund Romberg with lyrics by Oscar Hammerstein II for the Broadway show "The New Moon" and made famous by Billie Holiday. Benny and Pat's version is plagued with obvious production errors, such as an uncooperative gate, wardrobe mishaps, unrelenting props and Benny wandering over a mirror meant to be a pond.

## Lyrics

You went away I left you

We broke the ties that bind

I wanted to forget you

Let the past behind

Still the magic of the night I met you

You've been deeply in my mind

The sky was blue (The sky was blue)

And high above (And high above)

The moon was new (The moon was new)

And so was love (and so was love)

Lover, come back to me...

You came at last

Love had its day

That day is past

You've gone away
This aching heart of mine is singing

Lover, come back to me

When I remember every little thing

You used to do

I'm so lonely

Every road I walk along

I walk along with you

No wonder you were lonely

The sky is blue (The sky is blue)

The night is cold (The night is cold)

The moon is new (The moon is new)

But love is old (but love is old)

And while I'm waiting here

This heart of mine is singing

Lover, come back to me
Lonely Boy (song)

## Bio

**Lonely Boy** is a song that was sung by Benny Hill on March 26, 1975 as part of a pseudo-biography for 70s pop singer Tex Cymbal. He was accompanied by Libby Roberts, Eddie Buchanan and Jackie Wright on back-up and with a video that featured Jeannie Collings.

## Lyrics

If I were a squirrel, I'd frolic in the grass.

I'd climb up all the chestnut trees. and I'd slide down on my... hands and knees.

If I were a salmon, I would swim just beneath the ice.

And when the girls came skating past...

Oh, wouldn't it be nice?

I am just a lonely boy, and I must walk alone.

I'd love to have a little girl that I can call my own.

I love to hold her loving hand in mine.

Love to see her lovely face.

Love to kiss two lips as red as wine and feel her soft embrace.

But I am just a lonely boy, and I must walk alone.

I'd love to have a little girl that I can call my own.

I'd love to hold her loving hand in mine.

Love to see her lovely face.

Love to kiss two lips as red as wine and feel her soft embrace.

If I were a pigeon, every day I'd fly around to see my mother-in-law,

And I'd "pffft" right in her eye.

But I'm just an unlucky lad, so un-lucky it has often been said,

If I were Sophia Loren's baby boy, oh...

I'd be bottle-fed.

I am just a lonely boy, and I must walk alone.

I'd love to have a little girl that I can call my own.

I love to hold her loving hand in mine.

Love to see her lovely face,

Love to kiss two lips as red as wine and feel her soft embrace.

But I am just a lonely boy and I must walk alone,

I'd love to have a little girl that I can call my own.

I'd love to hold her loving hand in mine, long to see her lovely face,

Love to kiss two lips as red as wine and feel her soft embrace.

Feel her soft embrace...

Feel her soft embrace...

Feel her soft embrace...
Harvest of Love

## Bio

**Harvest of Love** was a love ballad performed by Benny Hill at the end of the March 22, 1972 episode. He performs the song sitting down with musical accompaniment but without his co-stars. An alternate version of the song was performed for Benny's recording with The Kestrels.

## Lyrics

I rise at six and then I feed the chicks,

And I'm feeling lonesome and blue,

And when I milk the cow it seems, somehow,

My thoughts keep straying to you.

And as the horse and I plough the field nearby,

Your memory I can't erase,

For while I walk at the rear of the horse, my dear,

I seem to see your face.

I'm gonna sow the seed of deep devotion, fertilize it with emotion,

Water it with warm desire and then I'll reap the harvest of love.

Yes, I was happy as a pig in spite of the way that you looked at me,

When I met you at the village dance,

But you was in the ladies' excuse me at the time,

I thought I would never have a chance.

But you went off with Jeff, our local chef,

And you courted him off by the hedge

And up come his wife with a long-handled knife

And cut off his meat and two vegs

I'm gonna sow the seed of deep devotion, fertilize it with emotion,

Water it with warm desire and then I'll reap the harvest of love.

I'm gonna sow the seed of deep devotion, fertilize it with emotion,

Water it with warm desire and then I'll reap the harvest of love.
Laura Wynne

**Laura Wynne** is an English actress and dancer who starred as one of the "Libby Roberts Dancers" on "3-2-1" and as one of the Hill's Angels in "The Benny Hill Show," appearing in the "Club Cabaret" routine on April 8, 1985 and "Costa Coco" number on May 27, 1985. She was also a member of the cast, starring in the drinking sketch that ended the April 8, 1985 episode. She also appeared in publicity photos with Benny Hill and other fellow Angels Sue Upton, Louise English, Lorraine Doyle and Emma Bryant at the unveiling of his wax likeness at Madame Tussaud's in 1986. Since the series, she appeared as a dancer in the movie, "Whoops Apocalypse," in 1986, along with Angels Lorraine Doyle, Emma Bryant and Tracy Smith.

## Episode(s)

* The B-Team
* Forever Love
* Carmen
Kevin Moran

**Kevin Moran** is a British actor whose career includes mostly uncredited roles on television. His TV appearances includes roles on "ITV Sunday Night Theatre," "Bachelor Father," "Comedy Playhouse," "Doomwatch," "The Two Ronnies," "Villains," "Z Cars," "Upstairs, Downstairs" and several uncredited roles on "Doctor Who." It is likely he played one of the extra British football players in the Match of the Week sketch on March 13, 1974. Not much is known about his life and career.

This maybe the Irish football player Kevin Moran who played for the League of Ireland in the 70s, but this is unconfirmed.
Friday Night Fever

## Production

**Episode:** 34

**Date:** December 26, 1978

**Time:** 50:50

**Musical Director:** Ronnie Aldrich

**Vocals:** The Ladybirds

**Choreography:** Samantha Stephens

**Producer:** Ronald Fouracre

**Director:** Ronnie Aldrich

**Writer:** Benny Hill

## Episode

* A Host of your Favorite Stars
	+ Tony Hatch and Jackie Trent
	+ Philip Dixey and his Nude Male Models
	+ The Hulas
	+ The Shillelagh Brothers
* Song: Coconut Milk
* Fred Scuttle: Man vs. Machine
* Grand Wheelchair Rally
* The Telephone Exchange
* Holiday Time
* Guest: Felicity Buirski - The Clock
* Quickies - 8
* Ballad: Go 'Round Again
* Friday Night Fever
* Tag: Crime Doesn't Pay

## Highlights

* Grand Wheelchair Rally
* The Telephone Exchange
* Friday Night Fever
* Tag: Crime Doesn't Pay

## Cast

* Benny Hill
* Henry McGee
* Jenny Lee-Wright
* Roger Finch
* John Quayle
* Cyril Cross
* Johnny Vyvan
* Eddie Connor
* Len Keyes
* Stephanie Lawrence
* Erica Lynley (credited as Erica Ludlow)
* Louise English
* Sue Upton
* Sharon Bond
* Tina Bond
* Mandy Perryment
* Victoria Shellard
* Sharon Fussey (uncredited)
* Lee Gibson (uncredited)
* Faye Hillier (uncredited)
* Sandra Hamilton (uncredited)
* Jayne-Marie (uncredited)
* Debbie Linden (uncredited)
* Stephanie Marrian (uncredited)
* Lynn Morgan (uncredited)
* Caroline Sargeant (uncredited)
* Ken Sedd (uncredited)
* Jenny Westbrook (uncredited)

## Quotes

* **Fred Scuttle** - "Stand where I told you!"
 **Arnold** - "You told me to stand here!"
 **Fred Scuttle** - "Never mind where I told you to stand, stand where I told you!"

* **Fred Scuttle** - "Give me two pronouns."
 **Arnold** - "Who me?"

* **Fred Scuttle** - "In what battle did Garibaldi die? His last one."

* **Fred Scuttle** - "What do you call a man who marries another man? A Vicar."

* **Fred Scuttle** - "What do you call a middle-aged Englishman who lives on a Polynesian island with four nineteen-year-old English girls? Bloody lucky."

* **Waiter**  - "He's only got one claw."
 **Salesman** - "He lost it in a fight."
 **Waiter**  - "Then bring me the winner!"

* **Henry McGee**  - "This is without a doubt the most ill-run, run-down, disgusting eating place I have ever been, and you are the most inept incompetent boorish waiter I have ever encountered!"
 **Waiter**  - "It is too late to apologize!!"

## Trivia

* First appearance of Louise English
* The opening acts feature the Shillelagh Brothers; if one looks closer, one of them is actually a sister - a gag that seems to have slipped past many viewers.
* Return of Sue Upton after several episode absence.
* "Friday Night Fever" is a spoof of the 1970s dance movie, "Saturday Night Fever."
* Selected sketches from this episode appear in the "Video Sideshow" VHS from HBO Home Video.

## Sequence

* **Last Episode:** The South Blank Show
* **Next Episode:** Leprechaun TV
Jerold Wells

Born August 8, 1908 in Wallington, England, **Jerold Wells** was an English actor who appeared primarily in British comedies. Sometimes credited as "Jerrold Wells," his films included "Adventures of a Plumber's Mate," the TV-made movie "Carry On Kitchener," "Time Bandits" and "Jabberwocky." He also appeared in several British TV-series, such as "The Two Ronnies," "The Old Curiosity Shop" and "The Benny Hill Show." He passed away on July 19, 1999 at the age of 90 in Bath, England.

## Episode(s)

* Fun in the Kitchen
* Coalpits
* The Monte Carbolic Show
* Carmen
* The Herd
* The Halitosis Kid
* Pepy's Diary

## Gallery

1/3
Love Will Find A Way

## Bio

**Love Will Find A Way** is a romantic melodrama set in the 1890s about the romance of two young actors named Claude and Fifi and the effort they try to keep it together after she marries a wealthy old financier.

In the narration, it is revealed that Claude (Benny Hill) is a penniless actor in love with Fifi (Lesley Goldie), but she is wooed by Pierre (Jackie Wright), a rich banker who she marries. However, she still loves Claude and manages to convince Pierre to hire him as their butler. In time, Claude and Fifi are having an adulterous affair all over the house behind Pierre's back. He is soon welcomed back in disguise to serve as the chauffeur, and in time, he and Fifi are fooling around again on picnics behind Pierre. Somehow, Claude gets invited back in another disguise as the gardener, but the tryst is discovered again and he's sent off once more. He manages to return once more dressed as a maid, but he and Fifi don't get much time together because he's now always running from a very amorous Pierre.

Pierre soon hires another maid (Jenny Lee Wright) to help in the mansion. Claude loves the idea of sharing a room with her, but between keeping his identity from her and running from Pierre, he becomes a nervous wreck far older than his normal years.

## Trivia

* The narration is done by Benny Hill.
* This is possibly the only sketch from Benny's black and white episodes at Thames to make it into syndication and home entertainment. It was also included in Benny Hill: Down Under.
* Parts of this sketch were later reused in The Lover on May 27, 1985 and The Grange on March 25, 1981.

## Gallery

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Maria, Maria

## Bio

**Maria, Maria** was the opening number on April 25, 1979. It was performed by Benny Hill before an Italian villa backdrop with Sarah Woollett, Abigail Higgins, Nola Haynes, Louise English, Emma Bryant, Sue Upton, Pauline Crawford and Francesca Whitburn. The song shares lyrics with Maria from November 19, 1969.

## Lyrics

(Note: The accuracy of these lyrics are in doubt.)

She thinks she is slim like the willow

She's just skinny and bony and tall

If she hadn't been blessed with two warts on her chest

She'd have no figure at all

She likes to please all the men but she's so terribly thin

There is hardly enough to go round

Once she swallowed a whole pickled onion

And twenty-four fellas left town

Oh, Maria, Maria, please say when

You will be mine, mine all alone

How I long for the day when

I can make you my own

I used to part my hair down the center

She said that was much too severe

So just to please her, I parted it

Across my head from ear to ear

"Tell me, how do you like my sexy hairstyle?"

I asked my Mexican Rose

"Amigo, you look magnifico,"

She whispered up my nose

Oh, Maria, Maria, please say when

You will be mine, mine all alone.

How I long for the day when

I can make you my own

Now, we went to the open-air theater

One summer night in the park

Soon I had to excuse myself

And I wandered off in the dark

I got back to my seat next to her

I'd not been gone more than a minute

I said, "How was the show?"

She said, "You ought to know.

You silly great fool, you were in it!"

Oh, Maria, Maria, please say when

You will be mine, mine all alone

How I long for the day when

I can make you my own

(*Benny launches the bow on his violin like a bow and arrow, and it hits Jackie Wright in the head.*)

Now, she used to try to make tea cakes

With a recipe her mother lent

In my mouth, they melted like butter

In my stomach, they set like cement

Now, she used to experiment daily

With different things that would fill me

It was just like playing Russian Roulette

'Cause I never knew which meal would kill me

Maria, you said you'd be faithful

But you cheated and you were untrue

But if I had to do it all over again

I'd do it all over you
Lindsey Cole

**Lindsey Cole** is an English actress and dancer who had an uncredited role as one of the Hill's Angels on "The Benny Hill Show."

Not much is known about her life and career. She started out as a member of the "Hot Gossip" dance troop, which also starred future Angels Lorraine Doyle, Susie Waring, Frances Wingate and Penny Kendall, before joining "The Benny Hill Show. She appeared in the "Club Chic-a-Go-Go" number on April 27, 1988.

Today, she is known as Lindsey Ashton.

## Gallery

* Lindsey and Duncan PettigrewGo to Duncan Pettigrew
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