"Show Me The Way To Go Home" - (Day 1 - Late Night)

*Vas Deferens,* Leo amused himself as he strolled toward his room. Having foregone the more sophomoric *Vas-hole* in his musings, the man wore a contented smile at the little name game he played.

Considering his disdain for interactions with the urchins of Lunar Veil, tonight's tête-à-tête roster had gone rather well. Adler proved consistent...he could be bought, a mindset perhaps augmented by the woodenness of Riley Thorne. *A gunfighter,* Leo smirked to himself, *who's been shown the 'great egress'.* Judging by the way Lunar Veil poked about the 'verse, he could afford to wait a few days before 'showing the money' and sealing the deal.

*Next target, Chavez,* he thought of the plays to be run. She'd be tougher...that annoying squirt's discovery of the nude photography had hardened the comely mechanic to his presence. *Still,* he considered, *her time aboard has obviously not been 'wine and roses,' so it's fairly certain that if I persuade Adler, she'll be inclined to take what I'm offering.* Perhaps he could sweeten that offer with a set of shower nudes featuring the nun...

But above all, the encounter with the manchild Vas had proven the most fruitful. Though he had actually been truthful with Adler regarding his opinions of the Veil's absentee command structure, playing upon the 'rooster kid's' insecurities had proven quite the boon. Watching the boy struggle to hold himself upright when dealing wit the Cortez fellow had proven a valuable bit of intelligence. Tonight, his first play at ruffling the teenager's mohawk had borne results...and revealed some hidden truths that Leo doubted Vas himself had come to know...or admit. Though he hungered to mop the deck with the boy in front of the entire crew...he had, after all, ridden his share of championship golden stools for his own fighting prowess...such visceral urgings were best put aside, given the inroads opened by tonight's realizations.

He had to move with finesse...

*"You....get me to my room."*

Leo's habit of studiously ignoring the other passengers, especially those who could not control their liquor, was disturbed by this man who slouched against the corridor bulkhead.

*"I am a paying guest on this ship and you will show me to my room. I know you ship rats like money."*

*Splendid,* Leo regarded the insolent drunkard. *I wonder how much they bilked this idiot for.* He considered welcoming the *Lìng rén tǎoyàn de niángmen* (obnoxious twat) to the boat with the Lieutenant's trademark throat punch, until a fresh realization stayed his hand. *He's throwing money,* the predator mused, smelling blood in the water. *Let's begin a learning adventure.*

Leo smiled at the drunk, before swooping in to boost him to his feet. "The root of all evil," he chuckled, "and I'm rooting for it." He wasted no time in propelling the passenger toward the guest rooms.

*"And keep me away from that little brat!Wha's her name..... Sirena?"*

Inroad Number One. "She's known by many names," Leo grinned as he hefted his new compatriot. "I simply labelled her 'The Annoyance.' Now, friend," he offered in smooth tone, "if you'll give me your room number, it'll make this so much easier."

*Finly, SOMEONE with a lick o sense*
“Hey, that’s a good name. Rather sooots her well.”
The man had taken his offer like he had been expected. Miserable creatures. Always looking for money as if it would elevate them in society.
“I didn’t get the number. But.. but I DID put a sign up. Now stop moving so fast oaf, you’ll make me ruin my clothes!”
He had forgotten about putting his name on his room door. Both a precaution in case of getting lost and an invitation for any suckers he could get money out of.
“Tell me, you need any therrr....any thare.... therappy?”

Me?” Leo said swaying. He was drunker than he originally thought, though acting sober was a skill he was well versed in. “No, but you’ve certainly come to the right ship. Where would you like to begin? The sexually repressed Crew Chief, the manic alcoholic captain, the deckhand ‘sibling rivalries,’ the mechanic with the Napoleon complex, or the Lieutenant, the ship's longest standing enabler? I challenge you to find someone on this ship NOT in need of your services,” Leo laughed. “But allow me to assist you. My name is Leo, “ he said, with a dramatic bow. “Leo Bennet. I deal in antiquities and art. Passenger, though feels more like a prisoner most days. Oh, the things I could tell you about this ship and the people on it--” He shook his head. “Care for a nightcap … er … another nightcap?” One drunk offered the other as he walked sliding sluggish along the wall. “Night is still young …”

He had plenty of time to try and break up the ‘merry band’ of crew mates aboard the Lunar Veil. Hell, half the work was already done for him, if the most recent near mass exodus was any indication. This ship had served its purpose, now? He’d enjoy watching her burn.

Even as a drunk, hearing the myriad of mental calamities walking around this ship was sweet music. He could do some good here.
As for his silver-tongued guides offer, he had enough sense to decline.
“Sorry.... I would peefer sush a meeting when I am sopher. Can’t let the mooth- breathers know I hate their guts.”
He could feel the numbness of sleep creeping into his mind. He would regret being so loose lipped in the morning, but the part of him that was aware of his actions felt glad to have such a kindred spirit onboard. There was at least someone here that he wouldn’t have to hide from.
“So then, Leeeo. Name yoor price for knowing my eensee wittle secret?”

"My price?" Leo asked with a Cheshire grin. "A drink on Greenleaf when we arrive, maybe a secret for a secret. No man is an island, after all. " The chance happening with the newcomer was just what he needed, perhaps here as well as planetside. He offered a welcome respite to life as Leo knew it aboard the Lunar Veil. And a secret? That certainly was intriguing. It may, he rationalized, also be the drunk ramblings of a man inebriated on... was that Plum Wine, he detected. Ugh, the Captain's vice of choice. The smell alone was enough to make a man nauseated. Still, it would behoove him to at least hear the newcomer out.

"Spill," He said with another toothy grin. "I promise I won't tell a soul."

Wait.... the man hadn’t caught on? Ofcourse, the imbecile must have been slinking somewhere when he first came on board.
Even when ready to make the wall jealous of what he was going to do with his floor, the cunning in his mind snapped to attention at the chance to save face.
“Ok... oook lishen. I get a little.... angry when drunking. I... I am a nice guy! I jusss get a leeeeetle mouthy.”
He needed to play it off like he was some inexperienced drunk. Had a bit too much, now feeling remorse for some harsh language, the usual pathetic act.
Great... he would need to cry.
The blubbering started off quiet, gradually swelling into an incoherent mess of a man.
Although having a silent rival would be nice, it was not preferred when he could have some sort of false shame to take the fall.
“I.. I.... I have neffferr even toushed a woaman before. Yet here I am, getting dragged to my room while I run away like the coward I am!”
He made sure to make a half-assed attempt to get a hug out of the guy, almost feeling sorry for him.
Now for the truly testing part of the act.
“You.... pleashheee tell tha loving little angel, Sirna, that she ishh a wonderful angel!”
He couldn’t continue after that. There were lines you crossed only in the most dire of circumstances. Sadly, this wasn’t one, but he needed to sap it up.
“I will pay. Fur yoour silenshe on eferythin else.”
And here he ended, going limp as snot and tears dribbled down his face.
*For God’s sake. Let this work.*

Leo blink swaying a bit. It was in one ear out the other at the moment as the drink was getting the better of him.

“We talking ‘bout the same Serena?” Leo asked head tilted. “Yay high, pigtails, a bit jailbaity and never … ever ... EVER shuts up less there a -” He lost his train of thought. “-Is that the one your talking about?” Leo laughed with a snort. “Maybe it’s you who needs a therapist.”

Was he… crying? Perhaps Leo overestimated the man. Or perhaps he was drunker than he originally thought. Either way the man was an ugly crier and an over-sharer, and Leo found his best recourse in those situations is to bade a hasty retreat.