A GRAVE-ING LUNATIC

Heh-Heh, WELCOME HACK for this LAST LURID-LECTURE BOILS AND GHOULS for this EERIE-EDITION! I, CREEPS, have found a GAG-GORE-MET here in my CASTLE! It concerns a REVOLTING-RESIDENT OF A HALF-SLAY HOUSE known as...

Back in the Spring of 1975, there was a house up, in the wilderness of New York, by a pond with a sign in the front yard reading: "POND VIEW HALFWAY HOUSE" on it. A man was mowing the lawn around the home and a teenager came out the front door. He waved to the man from on the front porch and the man waved back. The teenage boy watched the man stop walking and shut off the lawn mower. "Hia, Dennis, mowing the lawn today sir?" the teenager asked the man. "Hi, Charlie, yes. It's a nice day for it! How are ya?" Dennis responded to him. "Fine thanks. How are you doing?" Charlie responded to him, asking. "That's good. Good thanks. Remember it is your week to do the dishes for the house sir" Dennis responded. "Oh, yes sir I remember. I really appreciate the help you have given me here. I have sure gotten over my alcohol addition that my Buddies got me hooked on four years ago, Dennis" Charlie said to him, smiling. "My pleasure, Charlie, I am proud of you for your progress and success" Dennis said to him, smiling back and put his hand on his shoulder. "Thanks" Charlie said, smiling and walked to the back of the house then. He saw a teenage bully standing by the side of the home, drinking a bottle of Wild Turkey. "Hey, Charlie, how about a drink eh?" the bully asked him. "No thanks, Wally, I finally beat my alcoholism here!" he said, responding to him.

"What a wimp ya are!!" Wally said to Charlie, meanly. "Ah, please knock it off will ya Wally?!" Charlie asked the bully, begging him. "You worthless wimp Charlie. Shut the heck up!!" Wally said, angrily and pulled a pocket-knife out of his pocket, opening it. "Sure, Wally, just put that knife away please!" Charlie said, shocked. "What are you gonna do about it if I don't ya wimp?" Wally asked, threatening Charlie. "I could report you to Dennis for threatening me pal" he replied. Wally stabbed Charlie in the back from behind him five times. Charlie gasped in pain and fell to the ground dead then. Two years later, it was raining at Pond View Halfway House one Spring night. Wally sat out on the front porch, smoking a cigarette. He got up from the porch-swing, put his hood on his jacket up, and ran off from the place. He ran through the rain and wilderness behind Pond View, to a graveyard within a clearing. The bully got a flashlight out of his jacket-pocket and turned it on, shining it on a tombstone. The gravestone read: "CHARLES L. RHINEHART JUNE 20TH, 1959-APRIL 9TH, 1975" on it. "Hey there, Charlie! Happy Second Anniversary Of Death ya wimp! Dennis did not catch me and never did find out that I was the one who killed you!" Wally said and laughed in the rain. "See ya Loser!" he added, saying, and put his cigarette out on Charlie's tombstone. Wally ran off in the rain then. A rotting-hand of blackish-flesh shot up, out of the ground at Charlie's grave and the ground caved in, forming a hole. The rotting-blackish-fleshed-zombie of Charlie crawled out of his grave within the rain. His two rotting-eye-sockets had worms squirming within them. The zombie of Charlie stood up with the sickening-cracks of bones.

Charlie's zombie stepped out of the cemetery with the cracking of his bones in the pouring rain, as he spoke out: "Wally!" in a distorted voice. Meanwhile, the teenage bully ran back into Pond View Halfway House. Wally crept upstairs and into a bedroom, where he took off his jacket and threw it on the bed. He turned on a record-player with a record on it. "Margaritaville" By Jimmy Buffett played on the record player and record. The decaying-zombie of Charlie stepped into the front yard of Pond View Halfway House in the rain. The living-dead zombie walked into the home, as it spoke out: "Wally!" in its distorted voice. Within the darkness, the zombie of Charlie climbed the stairs, with more of his bones cracking. The door of the bedroom that Wally was in opened, as Wally shot darts at a dartboard. The zombie turned off the record-player and the bully turned around and stood, looking at the blackish-fleshed-zombie dressed in its withered black suit and tie. Wally screamed in horror, but Charlie's zombie wrapped his decayed-hands around his throat, choking the bully. Charlie's blackish-flesh dropped off of his bones, causing him to become a fresh skeleton. "I AM NOW A GRAVE-ING LUNATIC, WALLY!" the zombie of Charlie said to the bully in its distorted-voice. Wally's eyes widened in horror and the living-dead corpse jerked his head, twisting it around, killing him. The skeleton of Charlie laughed in its distorted voice. As the skeleton walked back to the graveyard within the woods, the zombie of Charlie held Wally's skull within its boney-hands in the moonlight as it rained. Charlie laughed eerily in its distorted voice, while his bones cracked.

Charlie had some SKULL in the SCARE-REA where he got A-HEAD IN ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. As for Wally, he found out that Charlie was only GROUNDED for a HOLE TWO FEARS heh-heh-heh! Well, before you boys and girls get into a GRAVE SITUATION, I'll be back for my NEXT NAUSEATING-NARRATION OF AN ISSUE hee-hee-hee-hee-hee!