Dick Facts

Dick Facts by LW and Worm

## Dick Facts With LW

* Only primates don't have that bone in their dick that makes it hard.
* We primates depend entirely on blood not going to the brain
* There was a french guy who got a 3 hour erection after getting covid and he had to have the blood drained
* monke dick
* Normal dicks are slightly smaller than the respective animals normal coochie
* Rasputin had a giant ass dick but not as big as that guy ↓
* This one dude has a 13.5 in dick i think he was called falcon or smth
* Turtle pp thicc
* Whale pp thicc
* Human pp not so thicc
* Dogs have a bulb thing on their penis which apparently is a kink
* It is a kink lol theres a specific nrop category of “dog”
* There is a Museum of Penises in Iceland. There is also a Museum of Erotica in St Petersburg, Russia, where Rasputin’s dick is kept in a jar.
* Using the ratio of pp to body size, if a turtle was a human (like our teenage mutant friends), it would have a 4 foot dick. This makes teenage mutant ninja turtles much more weird. Like, where tf does it go?
* Leo saw his first dick on 4/23/08 because that was when i was born and i saw my own dick B)
* It has been rumored that Hitler only had one ball. There is even a British song about it.
* Apparently, Napoleon was a small pp at 1.5 inches. I do not know if this is true but it would be funny if it was.

## Learn About Reptile Penises with Worm

* So there are three main categories of reptile penises: hemipenes, normal peens, and no peens (three categories that i have identified).
* Reptiles, like birds, have cloacas. These are holes with three purposes: pissing, shitting, and fucking. Their digestive tract, urinary tract, and reproductive systems actually have different paths that connect at the cloaca. No, reptiles do not have separate openings for their dicks. Like many other animals, their dicks are sheathed in this hole, and pop out during fucking time. Their dicks are folded up or tucked in their cloaca. This means that gay lizards cannot have anal, which is depressing.
* Hemipenes, singular hemipenis, are a pair of penises that snakes and lizards have. Two spiky penises, one on each side. They’re actually pretty small, and only one is used at a time. No one is powerful enough to use both at once. Hemipenes are also the reason why male snakes have thicker tails than female snakes.
* Each penis is called a hemipenis. They are called hemipenes in pairs.
* Normal penises are just singular penises. Testudines(turtles and tortoises) and crocodilians both have just one penis. Turtles have massive penises! (as i’m sure you know). Fun fact: turtles have been proved to masturbate.
* Alligators can be like 14 feet long, but their dicks are a pathetic 4 inches erect. Speaking of erect,
* Alligator dicks are always erect, even sheathed! They just kinda… pop out? There’s a video somewhere on YouTube showing this guy dissecting an alligator, and when he touches the nerve next to the penis, it pops out. So alligators don’t need blood for an erection.
* Tuataras are the only reptiles that don’t have penises. I bet they’re lonely :( . How do they fuck and have orgies, you might ask? Well, like (most) birds, tuataras line up their cloacas and the male’s muscles contract to ejaculate. hehe coom
* Since tuataras are literally ancient and dino-like, it’s been guessed that dinosaurs did not have penises. Which leads to another question, how did dinosaurs fuck? We’ve seen dinosaur eggs, which means they must’ve fucked, but how would two 100 ton massive dinosaurs lay down to fuck? Their legs would get in the way. And they probably wouldn’t be able to get back up. If the male climbed onto the female, first of all, her back is now broken, and second of all, there’s a fatass tail in the way. Also, he’d have to projectile-ejaculate. So, science doesn’t know how dinosaurs fucked. There’s a video somewhere talking about this but I can’t find it.
* Unlike mammals, reptile cum is not ejaculated from the urethra. Instead, it goes directly from their balls to their cloaca, and it flows along a groove in the penis.
* Reptile balls are inside their body and not outside like humans.
* (technically human balls are also inside because theres this bag that grows a bunch of hair and is a FUCKING PAIN to shave) - Leo

I know this all from memory which is incredibly concerning.

Questions? I won’t answer them because i probably don’t fucking know.