A Chewy Situation

Bob, Susie, Peter, Natalie, J.J., and Pedro: (in singsong) Mr. Sebastian Tute!

[BELL TOLLING, CROWD CHEERING]

Sebastian Tute: Welcome, my friends, to my factory. Would you come forward? Please show your Golden Tickets. Are we ready? Yes! Good! In we go!

[CROWD CHEERING]

[MARCHING BAND PLAYS]

Sebastian Tute: Now, hats, Coats, galoshes over here. Hurry, we have so much time and so little to see. Thank you.

Natalie Tute: When do I get it? Boy, what Coat hangers!

Bob Tute: Surprises around every corner, but nothing dangerous!

Sebastian Tute: Don't be alarmed. As soon as your outer vestments are in hand... we'll begin. Now... will the children kindly step up here?

Natalie Tute: Accidents? What kind of accidents? I didn't know we had to sign anything.

J.J. Tute: I can't read the bottom, Never between friends.

Natalie Tute: What about me?

Sign away! We've got nothing to lose.

Susie Tute: Let's go in! Come on!

Sebastian Tute: Paüence! Everything has to be in order. Everyone signed? Yes? Good. On we go!

Peter Tute: I don't like this! Is it my soul that calls me by name?

Sebastian Tute: Question time will come at the end of the session. We must press on. Come along. Ah, here we are. Don't be a fool. That's the way we came in.

Peter Tute: What is this?

Pedro Tute: A fun house?

Sebastian Tute: Why? Having fun?

Natalie Tute: I've had enough. I'm not going in there.

Bob Tute: We're getting out of here.

Susie Tute: You can't get out backwards. You have to go forward to go back.

Pedro Tute: The room is getting bigger if any of us will get out alive. No one can get through there.

Sebastian Tute: My dear friends... you are now about to enter the nerve center... to the entire factory. Inside this room, all of my dreams become realities. And some of my realities become dreams. And almost everything you'll see is eatable...you can eat almost everything.

Susie Tute: Let me in, I'm Starving!

Sebastian Tute: Don't get overexcited. Now, the combination. This is a musical lock.

[PLAYS KEYBOARD]

Sebastian Tute: behold, the Candy Room. Hold your breath. Make a wish. Count to three.

Susie Tute: this one, looks sweet, and i want one lollipop. I want you to get me one right away!

Bob Tute: All right, I'll get you one, just chill, okay.

Pedro Tute: Mm. This is terrific.

Susie Tute: bobzy, look at that chubby old grape.

Bob Tute: Don't worry, he can't drink it all. save some room for later.

Natalie Tute: Don't do that! The chocolate must never be touched by human hands. You're contaminating the entire river! Please, I beg you! Help! Do something! Quick, here. Grab this!

Susie Tute: What's happening to him?

Natalie Tute: He's drowning. How long is he going to stay down?

Bob Tute: He can't swim! No better time to learn.

J.J. Tute: His coat's going up the pipe! He's blocking the chocolate! What happens now?

Natalie Tute: The pressure will get him out. It's building up behind the blockage.

Bob Tute: How long will it take to push him through? The suspense is terrible.

Sebastian Tute: I can only give them to you if you swear to keep them for yourselves. And never show them to another soul as long as you live. Agreed?

CHILDREN [IN UNISON]: Agreed!

Natalie Tute: What's for dessert? Here it comes! Blueberry cream! It's the most marvelous I've ever tasted!

J.J. Tute: What's happening? Cool it!

Natalie Tute: Let me finish.

J.J. Tute: oh my goodness, my face is turning blue!

Natalie Tute: I'm turning blue!

J.J. Tute: What do you mean? Told you I hadn't got it right yet.

Bob Tute: Look what it's done!

Pedro Tute: It always goes wrong when it comes to the desserts. Always.

Susie Tute: Guys, what are you doing?!

Natalie Tute: You're blowing up! I feel funny!

Bob Tute: I'm not Surprised. What's happening?!

Susie Tute: You're like a balloon!

Sebastian Tute: Like a blueberry.

J.J. Tute: Call a doctor!

Susie Tute: They'll pop!

Sebastian Tute: It happens every time! They all become blueberries. You've done it this time!

Pedro Tute: I'll break you for this!

Bob Tute: I'll get it right in the end.

Susie Tute: Oh, we've got to let the air out of them!

Sebastian Tute: There's no air. That's juice.

Susie Tute: I want a golden goose!

Peter Tute: All right, dont react. You'll get one

Susie Tute: I want one of those! Who says I can't? I want one! (Fallen down the garbage)

Bob Tute: Where's she gone?

Peter Tute: Where all the other bad eggs go. Down the garbage chute.

Bob Tute: Hold on! I’m coming! Are you okay?

Susie Tute: no, I wasn’t, but those brats just fell down the bad eggs

Peter Tute: Lights, camera, action!

J.J. Tute: Where are you?

Pedro Tute: He's up there, in a million pieces. are you there?

Peter Tute: No good shouting. Watch the screen.

Sebastian Tute: Why is he taking so long?

Bob Tute: A million pieces take time to put together.

Pedro Tute: Where are they? There's something coming through. It's hard to tell, but...

Sebastian Tute: Oh! Our group's getting smaller by the minute!

Peter Tute: Look at me! I'm the first person in the world to be sent by television!

Susie Tute: Wow, what a wild trip that was!

Bob Tute: It's the greatest thing that's ever happened!

Sebastian Tute: Am I coming in clear? I said, am I coming in clear? Great. They're completely unharmed.

Bob Tute: You call that unharmed?! Wow, that was something. Can we do it again?

Natalie Tute: No, there'll be nothing left!

Susie Tute: Don't worry. I feel fine. We're famous! We're TV stars! And we’re happy to sing you a song

Bob, Susie, Peter, Natalie, J.J., and Pedro: If you’re feeling rather peckish

And you need a bite to eat,

What about a ‘freebie’ banquet?

How’s that for a special treat!

Do you have a favourite candy?

Favourite confectionery?

Don’t you think it might be handy

If it was completely free?

Look at this!

A house made of gingerbread!

Yes, that was what we said,

A house made of gingerbread!

Quality with quantity unlimited!

No one’s keeping tabs!

Feast your eyes on all you could ever want!

All you could ever want - and don’t let’s get nonchalant!

It’s a kind of edible restaurant! And it’s up for grabs!

Window sills of strawberry sponge cake,

Window panes of sugared glass.

Leading made from strips of liquorice

Adds a little touch of class!

On the roof a swiss-roll chimney

Sits on top of toffee tiles!

Candy floss, all pink and fluffy

Billows out and floats for miles!

Look at this!

A house made of gingerbread!

Yes, that was what we said,

A house made of gingerbread!

Quality with quantity unlimited!

No one’s keeping tabs!

Feast your eyes on all you could ever want!

All you could ever want - and don’t let’s get nonchalant!

It’s a kind of edible restaurant!

And it’s up for grabs!

Gold-wrapped coins of rich, dark chocolate,

Pressed into a chocolate door!

In the garden, plants and flowers,

Oozing honey-sap galore!

This house, unlike any other,

Is a house beyond belief!

Stay here – life could be so sweet, BUT….

Just make sure you brush your teeth!!!

Look at this!

A house made of gingerbread!

Yes, that was what we said,

A house made of gingerbread!

Quality with quantity unlimited!

No one’s keeping tabs!

Feast your eyes on all you could ever want!

All you could ever want - and don’t let’s get nonchalant!

It’s a kind of edible restaurant!

And it’s up for grabs!