Crampers

Inspired by the "Runner's Cramp" sketch from The Class Clowning Kit and Plotapaths, each figure is lying on a futon; when their left ankles are pushed up, they will make a farting noise and then talk. They were made by Funrise from 2007-2011.

## Encouragements

Besides being able to break wind and then speak when their ankles are pushed, their futons have motion sensors; when walked by, they will encourage whoever walks by them to push their ankles because they have runner's cramp.

### Phil

1. "I got runner's cramp, give my ankle a push!"
2. "Yow, that runner's cramp's gotta hurt-please push my ankle!"
3. "OOH, OWW-runner's cramp, push my ankle!"
4. "If you've got the healing touch, PLEASE push my ankle to cure me!"
5. "So you wanna be a medical pro? Just push my ankle and I'll fully recover!"
6. "I just ran around the schoolyard, so PLEASE-push my ankle!"
7. "Please assist me; just push my ankle!"
8. "You've got the power of making runner's cramp go down in history, push my ankle-PLEASE!"

### Madison

1. "Ow, my leg-push my ankle, please!"
2. "Please cure me; push my ankle!"
3. "Please give my ankle a push, you know you need to!"
4. "I'm cramping, PLEASE push my ankle!"
5. "I got runner's cramp, help me out and push my ankle up!"
6. "Yowee, I'm cramping-PLEASE push my ankle!"
7. "You've got the healing touch, push my ankle and make this cramp of mine go away!"
8. "I've got a bad case of runner's cramp, help me and push my ankle!"

### Kim

1. "I'm coming down with runner's cramp; please push my ankle!"
2. "Push my ankle, please-I'm cramping like crazy!"
3. "Please cure me; push my ankle!"
4. "I'd like you to help me out; just push my ankle!"
5. "I just ran around Westley, but I'm cramping-push my ankle!"
6. "Help me out, please-just push my ankle and I'll be all better!"
7. "Ouch, I've got runner's cramp-PLEASE push my ankle!"
8. "I've got a case of runner's cramp-please push my ankle!"

### Kam

1. "I'm really going to need assistance, push my ankle!"
2. "Please push my ankle; I'm cramping!"
3. "Help me out and push my ankle!"
4. "Assist me, please-push my ankle!"
5. "My ankle needs to be pushed; PLEASE help me!"
6. "Push my ankle, please-I REALLY need assistance!"
7. "Could somebody please push my ankle?"
8. "This really hurts...push my ankle!"

## Phil the Farter

Not your average 7th grade schoolboy, Phil the Farter keeps things real-in fact, greater than fantasy! Just push his ankle for hilarious farts and wisecracking expressions! His vocals are provided by Phil "Philly" Lamarr, African-American entertainer.

1. (FRUPPP!) You denied it, you supplied it!
2. (FRUPPP!) Did I do that?
3. (FRAAAP!) FART, goes the Philly! (sung to the end of "Pop, Goes the Weasel")
4. (FRAAAP!) My butt has to be muted for now.
5. (BRAAAP!) This is Phil the Farter 'cause I'm the one and only!
6. (BRAAAP!) That's the noise of victory!
7. (PLLLBT!) I've broken the wind so you can PASS it on!
8. (PLLLBT!) Gosh dang it, that was just plain deadly!
9. (BRAAAACK!) Could somebody open a window here?
10. (BRAAAACK!) That's gonna linger awhile!
11. (PBBBBT!) That's my backdoor bass!
12. (PBBBBT!) Na-na-na-na-na-na, Phil the Farter! (sung to the 60s Batman theme)
13. (FRRRP!) I bet THAT left tracks!
14. (FRRRP!) I've made my mark!
15. (PFFFFT!) Musta been something I ate!
16. (PFFFFT!) That oughta clear the room!

## Madison the Vegan Farter

Ecofriendly and lovably humourous, Madison the Vegan Farter isn't your average 7th-grade schoolgirl; she really lets it loose when you push her ankle...and talks, too!

1. (FRUPPP!) Was that you?
2. (FRUPPP!) Ow, my butt!
3. (FRAAAP!) It wasn’t me!
4. (FRAAAP!) That was all wet!
5. (BRAAAP!) That's gotta leave a stain!
6. (BRAAAP!) Why'd I do THAT?
7. (PLLLBT!) Going green with scentless flatulence is my claim to fame!
8. (PLLLBT!) That oughta clear the air!
9. (BRAAAACK!) No carbon here!
10. (BRAAAACK!) I'm fossil fuel-free!
11. (PBBBBT!) Can somebody use the air freshener?
12. (PBBBBT!) That's disgusting!
13. (FRRRP!) I didn't do it!
14. (FRRRP!) I have to go to the bathroom.
15. (PFFFFT!) That was making you sick!
16. (PFFFFT!) It smells like a cucumber to me!

## Kim the Klown, World's Cutest Tooter

An adorably comical schoolgirl, Kim the Klown, World's Cutest Tooter, is purely charming with her delightfully goofy expressions after each pooting noise.

1. (FRUPPP!) It couldn't be me!
2. (FRUPPP!) What's that noise anyway?
3. (FRAAAP!) Who put that whoopie cushion there?
4. (FRAAAP!) I swear that it was NOT ME!
5. (BRAAAP!) That's funny! \*giggles\*
6. (BRAAAP!) Oh, that's a good one! \*hysterical laughter\*
7. (PLLLBT!) Who needs a whoopie cushion when you've got you-know-who?
8. (PLLLBT!) Oopsie, excuse me!
9. (BRAAAACK!) Sorry, I broke the sound barrier!
10. (BRAAAACK!) Toots and laughs go together like peanut butter and jelly!
11. (PBBBBT!) Pardon me, I blew my butt bugle!
12. (PBBBBT!) I just HAD to break wind!
13. (FRRRP!) Oh my gosh, what was that?
14. (FRRRP!) Hey, you tooted!
15. (PFFFFT!) Wink-I accuse you!
16. (PFFFFT!) Darn it, SBD!

## Kam the Klown, Super-Duper Tooter

A plucky, comical japester, Kam the Klown, Super-Duper Tooter, really lets things go when you push his ankle...and he talks, too!

1. (FRUPPP!) Evildoers, beware of my butt wind!
2. (FRUPPP!) What a nifty toot!
3. (FRAAAP!) Ooh, that's a big one!
4. (FRAAAP!) Clear the room!
5. (BRAAAP!) Was that you?
6. (BRAAAP!) Gas here, get your free gas here!
7. (PLLLBT!) All right, who did that?
8. (PLLLBT!) Hey, you farted!
9. (BRAAAACK!) Keep going, I'll find you!
10. (BRAAAACK!) Please stop bragging back there!
11. (PBBBBT!) That tickles! \*snickers\*
12. (PBBBBT!) Ow, my eyes! \*screams\*
13. (FRRRP!) Evildoers, beware my butt wind!
14. (FRRRP!) I'm a gas-powered crime-fighter!
15. (PFFFFT!) Breaking wind and saving the world!
16. (PFFFFT!) Cutting the cheese is my superpower!