William Hinse-MacCulloch

## The Rt. Hon. William Hinse-MacCulloch

The **Rt. Hon. William Hinse-MacCulloch** was an accomplished model parliamentarian active from MPSP16 to MPSP18. During his three years as MP, he represented the great riding of Halifax and made great show of pretending to be an authentic Haligonian. On the second day of MPSP18, he briefly served as prime minister before shockingly pulling his party out of the governing coalition.

## MPSP16

Prior to his first election, Hinse-MacCulloch was an early supporter of the HICK Party. However, the HICK Party proved to be more volatile than its traditional roots would suggest, and opted to merge with the competing CBC Party to prevent an inexperienced BASIC government on the first day. This formed the new INC Party, with a radically different ideology and campaign platform. As a result, Hinse-MacCulloch switched allegiances to the BASIC Party in order to serve under his best friend Marcus Mattucci, in spite of a general distate for basic things like lattes, albeit with a certain fondness for pink clothing. In his first term, he was elected to the riding of Halifax under the BASIC banner, with the party taking second place behind INC which formed government.

Hinse-MacCulloch was named deputy Opposition Critic for Justice, serving under his friend the Hon. Yianni Boosalis. However, due to poor party organization, this proved to be an essentially meaningless role. When half-way through the first day the INC Government fell on a motion of non-confidence, Hinse-MacCulloch was initially left out of the Cabinet for the BASAP Government that resulted from the merger of BASIC and ASAP. On the morning of the second day, as BASAP merged with PRIME and became CRIMÉ, he was named Minister of Veterans Affairs. His most significant contribution to this role was successfully recommending that it be abolished due to being essentially useless.

After securing the passage of the CRIMÉ bill, the government moved to declare war on pumpkin spice pursuant to the Connolly Protocol. Having been conquered by pumpkin spice during his time in BASIC, Hinse-MacCulloch voted against the motion, thus defeating the government. For the remainder of the Parliament, Hinse-MacCulloch sat as an independent, jeering at the government alongside his friend Mattucci.

## MPSP17

Hinse-MacCulloch was a founding member of the HOOK Party, though the leadership of the LIT and MAPLE parties actively campaigned for his allegiance. In the following election, HOOK narrowly lost to the CPU Party and formed the Official Opposition. Hinse-MacCulloch was re-elected by his constituents in Halifax.

Hinse-MacCulloch was named the party's critic for facial hair and accessories, a portfolio which had long been at his heart. When the CPU government was overthrown at the end of the first day of the sitting, HOOK formed a coalition with the rookie CLASS Party, forming the GOLD government. Hinse-MacCulloch was named Minister of Facial Hair and Accessories in the new cabinet. The government succeeded in securing passage of its flagship bill. However, it then chose to declare war on Frengland in yet another iteration of the Connolly Protocol, resulting in a backbench revolt and the complete disintegration of the party into multiple disparate new parties. This led to arguably the most confusing final hour of a Model Parliament sitting in recent memory. Caught in the crossfire, Hinse-MacCulloch refused to commit to any of the factions, once more finding solace in independence by sitting next to his best friend Marcus Mattucci.

## MPSP18

Hinse-MacCulloch was one of the first people to rally to the burgeoning Quartier Party, and was crucial to re-oganizing its initial campaign platform towards a more electable and MPSP-friendly one. He was named House Leader for the party and participated in the drafting of most of its key policy points, alongside rookie party leader Trevor Stewart and deputy leader Megan Spooner. The party at first struggled to attract followers due to its staunchly bilingual and pro-French stance, but gained momentum following a strong performance in the debates and a strong social media strategy. On election night, Quartier narrowly came in fifth place, while the WAVE party formed government.

Following the election, Quartier entered into a provisional coalition agreement with the Canadian Alliance of Steins and Kegs (CASK), giving birth to the Macdonald-Cartier Coalition. This coalition sat together in the House of Commons at the Official Opposition, and presented Bill C-5, arguably the most intelligently-written piece of legislation to be tabled in Model Parliament in recent memory. At the end of the first day of the sitting, the WAVE government fell on a motion of non-confidence. Quartier and CASK added the GoT Party to their coalition to form government (forming what was informally referred to as the Macdonald-Cartier-Targaryen Coalition).

On the second day of the session, Hinse-MacCulloch made a shocking rise to become Prime Minister, succeeding departing CASK leader Michael Giesbrecht at the head of the governing coalition. The caucus had quickly determined that his experience and wisdom would prove to be more useful to the premiership than the youth and verve of Stewart. Just before the crucial confidence vote on the coalition government's bill, however, Hinse-MacCulloch made a shocking announcement that the Quartier Party would be withdrawing from the governing coalition due to the increasing marginalization of its policies. He subsequently resigned as Prime Minister and handed the reigns over to GoT House Leader and coalition Minister of Foreign Affairs Georgia Stanley. The government bill was then resoundingly defeated and a new super-party took government - DADDY.

Following the coalition's collapse, the remainder of the Quartier caucus unanimously voted to stay together and formed the third party in opposition to the DADDY-FUN government. Hinse-MacCulloch returned to his familiar role of House Leader for Quartier for the remainder of the 2018 Parliament.

## MPSP19

Rumours abound as to where fate will take Hinse-MacCulloch next during his MPSP journeys. Some reports indicate that he has been working on founding a new newspaper to rival the Anglo-only RoastMedia outlets and cater to Francophones. Only time will tell what comes of this...