Randy Jade

**Randy Valentine Jade** is one of the several characters that Phonegingi has the ability to date. His associated color is a pale teal (#6BA8A8), matching his phone color, and his dialogue font is Wash Your Hands.

**WARNING: THIS WIKI PAGE FEATURES MEGAGINORMOUS SPOILERS FOR THE ROUTE SO GET OUT OF HERE**

## Randal "Valentine" Jade

### Occupation

Sex Hotline Operator (Determinant)
Swan Wrangler (Determinant)

Ticket Stand Worker (Determinant)

Monster fucker

## Appearance

Randy is male, with a Nokia 3410 as a phone head. On his forehead above the Nokia logo is a bandaid with the words "Fuckface" scrawled onto it. He wears a denim sweater jacket, and beneath it, a gray and blue plaid button-up. He wears denim jeans and (in a previous build) blue canvas shoes. On his hands, he wears bloodied bandages, implied to be from swan-related injuries. He is described as being quite scrawny and pale.

## Information

Randy lives in the dumpster behind Bunny's Burgers, and works as a swan-wrangler for Dialtown Animal control, as well as a sex hotline operator. He can be met by travelling to Downtown Dialtown and calling the sex hotline, listed on an advertisement when you interact with a telephone pole. Randy's route consists mainly of themes involving self-worth, control, depression and poverty. He's vocal about his dislike for his jobs and his quality of life.

During the initial date with Phonegingi, he flees after they suggest interacting with the fortune-telling machine at the fair.

## Personality

Upon meeting him, Randy is a spineless person, weak-willed and with low self esteem. He struggles with his self-worth and confidence, often referring to himself as a coward. He fears the future, stating he doesn't want to see into the next few years of his life.

## Backstory

Randy had a completely fine childhood, "bordering on mediocre". He had a steady job and an apartment. But, it was when he decided to step out of his comfort zone that things went awry.

In his route, it is revealed by Randy that he acquired his band aid during the hospital visit following a head injury sustained after accidentally groping his then-date— the writing on it being from the doctor, who happened to be his date's father. He was told his band aid cannot be removed, as his head would explode.

After his date, Randy was desperately trying to get rid of the writing scrawled on his band aid before he had to return to work at Bunny's Burgers, resulting him using water, soapy water, bleach, and eventually *drain cleaner*. After getting high from inhaling the fumes from the cleaner, he showed up three days late to work, high as a kite, with a possum in his arms -- and was fired on the spot.

Randy believes to have been cursed by Madame Mediocre, a fortune-telling machine present during his date. While interacting with the machine in hopes to mitigate how bored his date was becoming, the machine sprang to life, blaring the same words over and over, "**YOUR FUTURE IS FORFEIT, YOU WILL DIE ALONE AND MISERABLE, GO FUCK YOURSELF!";** startling Randy and causing him to strike at the machine, which fell on top of him, leading him to have a nasty concussion. Jerry later explains that this is because a worker who programmed the machine, while drunk, intended to set this message to have a one in one thousand chance to play, but instead set it as *one thousand in one*, meaning it played *every* time, *one thousand times.* On top of this, the busted machine was stuck at full volume.

When speaking to Madame Mediocre, after persuading Jerry to let you into the funfair, she says that Randy's issue isn't being cursed, it's his lack of hope or motivation to take charge of his life. He takes everything with no resistance, and this lack of fighting for his own happiness is a major cause on why things aren't getting better.

## Endings

Randy's Good Ending (Canon): During the mugging, tell Randy to stand up for himself, like above. When Randy asks to go back to your place, say yes. Let it play out. At the end, you get a bandage option/choice. Pick either 'cutesy' or 'encouraging'. This ending results in Randy having a new job and home at the funfair as a ticket operator, and generally a new start at life, along with some well-earned new confidence. His appearance is also changed to having a brown band aid on his forehead, either now having "Sweetheart" or "Tough Guy" scrawled on its surface.

Asshole Ending: Exact same as above, except you pick the 'soul crushingly cruel' option (the red one) when you write on Randy's band aid. Though Randy still has a successful job and fresh start, he's rightfully crushed by Gingi's actions. This changes his appearance to having a brown band aid on his forehead, with "Fuckface v2" scrawled on it's surface.

Fence Ending: During the mugging, tell Randy to stand up for himself. When Randy asks to go back to your place at the park later, say no. Phonegingi decides to break into the funfair to check on their eggs, and while climbing the fence they fall of off it, shit themselves, and is confronted by Jerry, who says they are about to die.

80's Drug PSA Ending: During the subway mugging, tell Randy to play possum. When the mugger advances on you, accept the advances. This leads to a cutscene with the Mugger and Phonegingi having sex -- or attempting to -- and ends with Phonegingi dying of an overdose.

Jail Ending: During the mugging, play possum, then reject mugger. When Randy gives you the offer on day 3 at the fence, accept. This ending results after Randy snaps, taking desperate measures to free himself of his curse. He phones Phonegingi, telling them to meet him at the Funfair's Fence, and, as Phonegingi Arrives, Randy has broken a hole into the fence and armed himself with a hammer, where he states he's going to smash the machine to free himself of his curse. However, the police manage to catch and capture him and Phonegingi, and it ends with the two in prison.

Hammer Ending: Same as above, but reject Randy's offer at the fence. The major difference in this ending is, instead of being jailed, Randy trips while going to destroy the machine and launches the hammer into the air, which manages to hit him in the head, killing him instantly.

## Trivia

* Randy's Birthday is February 19th, and he is 25 years old. He is a Pisces.
* His accident happened 3 years prior to the events of Dialtown, making him 22/23 at the time.
* Randy is canonically queer and attracted to all genders, as referenced in the game ("Beggars can't be choosers") and by DirectDoggo. Dogman has also said it is up to interpretation and any mspec label can be applied to him (bisexual, pansexual, etc).
* Randy was said in the Dialtown Discord Server to be a college dropout. He was a business major. In the extra menu of the game, he was confirmed to have been lying to his dad about pursuing a Master's in Pharmaceutical Chemistry.
* Hound is Randy's body model.
* Randy's phone model is a Nokia 3410.
* Randy's full name is a pun-name. Randy being another word for "horny", seeing his occupation as a sex worker, and Jade -- "jaded" meaning depressed, and additionally another joke about how sex workers will usually have crystals as stage names. His middle name was going to Avery as a reference to avians, (birds).
* In the extras menu, it is said Randy's middle name starts with "V", and that he's embarrassed about it. This was confirmed to be "Valentine", in the Dialtown discord server.
* The name of Randy's ex is Lola, also confirmed by Dog.
* Randy is the only character to have a death ending.
* When talking to God outside of reality, he reveals that in one alternate timeline Randy was the one who caused the Dialup.
* He was raised catholic.
* A plush version of him was released and made available for purchase from November 4th, 2022 to December 3rd, 2022.