Presenting The Lizard King, in Yellow Fever

## Prelude

The Lizard King, a Serpent Man, lies in state on an elaborate stone bier. As the curtain retracts, it brushes against his foot, causing him (it?) to open his eyes and taste the air with his tongue. Abruptly, he coils himself upon the bier and flows to the ground, before standing to address The Audience.

The Lizard King: I wake. Again. The time's not right,

Our stars are sunken, gravid with their sleep,

And I alone to witness.

Shall I then

As e'en before, slake thirst and hunger

Upon the blood of apes, and then, engorged

And sated, hie me to my tomb

To sleep away the wheeling of the years,

The stars, the seasons, time and tide

In endless dream of lost Valusia?

With time, descend to where my cousins are

A witless hunt of ghosts, forgetting all

But what they might have been, slamming

The door in vain upon the Pallid Mask?

No, I'll not.

For though the realm of Ghatanathoa be sunk,

Great R'lyeh drown'd, and wondrous Thule

now home to maggot-apes and monsters

still are they mappèd in the blood and bones

of these, our slaves, who ape their masters

piling stone on stone - a worthy task

for those unfit for freedom

to build the yoke I'll place upon their necks.

Where heavens fail, the mounded earth shall answer.

The labyrinth is builded, and time's flow

Is dammed and swirls; the flotsam there

is fitted to my hand. There I'll lure

The Stranger to my trap, unwitting

The biter bit, the spider spun

within a web of stone!

Where cousins failed, I will tread

A path to reach the stars, and pile them high

Around me as the jewels of apish kings.

Or die, or eddy endlessly myself,

`tis better than to sleep once more in stone.

*Exit The Lizard King*

## Scene 1

Enter The Agents, wearing black hats, sunglasses, and suits and carrying chairs, and The Stranger. The Stranger's face is hidden by a Phantom of the Opera-style white mask. He is reading from large cardboard folder bearing The Yellow Sign and carrying a black doctor's bag. The Agents place the chairs around the bier, including one with its back to the audience, which is for The Stranger. All sit.

At no point is The Stranger's face clearly visible to The Audience.

The Stranger places the folder upon the bier in such a way that it hides a portion of the bier from The Agents. The Stranger produces a Charlie's Angels intercom box from his bag, which he places on the table. Throughout this scene, The Stranger's voice comes from the intercom box. He does not visibly vocalise, but does gesticulate where appropriate.

The Agents' phones all ring. The ring tone for each one is "The Ride of the Valkyries". They answer the phones.

The Stranger: You are invited to a Night at the Opera.

The Agents: Shout, argue and babble incoherently. The Stranger gestures for silence.

Agent 1: I prefer Shakespeare.

Other Agents: groan.

The Stranger: You always use that line. It's getting old.

When you're up here, in the big chair,

Indulge in your Elizabethan schtick. I'll be right there,

But Agents, now it's Opera. That's the way

We play the game.

Agent 2: Just so we're clear – no more castrati.

Agent 3: Yeah, what was that?

Roman Polanski's Wild House of Pain?

Agent 2: Where all the children were insane.

Agent 3: And whacking off for the summoning.

The sound of helicopters is momentarily heard off-stage. It appears to go unnoticed.

The Agents, in unison: Yech!

The Stranger: Nothing like that, I hope. The mission

Involves a bit of history. There was a time,

And may it come again, when DG was legit.

That time was then, and this is now. But in that time,

The ending of the era, we sent a team – Well, more of a platoon,

Perhaps company, even – we sent them, is the point.

They went to hit a temple. In the jungle. East of Angkor

(to Agent 1) Yes, Captain – that's Cambodia –

None returned. A stinking scandal, cover-up and lies,

We've all been there. But now, it seems,

they're phoning home. Our ear on the ground

just picked this up.

The Stranger produces a player from his bag, and presses a button.

A static-ridden and warped (like a stretched tape) voice: Mayday Mayday, this is Lieutenant McFadden, Delta Green, Operation Obsidian is down, Obsidian is down, down, doooowwwwnnnn, the carving rim of the pit, oh God, the Pharos, round and round, ring rosy I won't be back til Yesterrrrddaaaay… Mayday Mayday

The Stranger: McFadden was the point man.

Good man, and we lost him. And he lost it,

Sounds like. Why is he transmitting? We don't know

He should be dead and buried,

It was thirty years ago.

(beat)

Go there and bury the dead.

Exit Agents.

## Scene 2

Sound: A medley of air travel noises is heard, followed by the chaotic noise of a SE Asian cityscape.

The Stranger removes the screen and intercom from the table. He takes from the bag a large, straw Panama hat, which he wears, a bottle of Mekhong whiskey, and a glass, which he fills from the bottle before placing them on the bier.

Enter Agents.

Agent 1 (to The Stranger): Are you Mac Feyd?

The Stranger (in a Texan drawl): Yep.

Agent 2: MIA finder, CIA minder, and, ah,

The Stranger: Phnom Penh whorehouse grinder.

You know who I am,

So good for you, or else I'd have to kill you.

So, let me spill it to you. You're the chumps

That Langley sent, to chase the wild goose

Through field, hedgerow, minefield and swamp.

And for what?

Agent 3: We heard a signal.

The Stranger: Probably some whacked-out vet

High on speed, ya ba, and memory

Trying to relive the glory days, a helicopter ace

His dick's his joystick and a mattress

In a rice field brothel, his cockpit.

I've now seen hundreds of them, it

Happens all the time.

Agent 1: You're kidding.

The Stranger: Situation normal. All Fucked Up.

(Beat)

The Stranger: OK, OK. I got your stuff,

The maps, the sat shots, all that shit.

(He places a map on the table)

Your temple is right here, on the Nung River.

To get you there, I got some native guides.

These guys fought for us in the war,

They'll do you right. They're in the back.

Enter three Tcho-Tcho. They smile, nod, and shake hands with The Agents.

Agent 1: OK, let's go.

Exit The Stranger.

## Scene 3.

Backdrop: Jungle. Flickering lights.

The scene commences with a stylised combat between The Agents and The Tcho Tcho. The Tcho Tcho's bodies seem to distort, extend and contract and flow around The Agents. The shadows on the wall behind the combat show men struggling with giant, predatory insects. The Agents are rapidly overpowered and immobilised.

Enter The Lizard King, smoking a reefer. The Agents are shocked.

The Lizard King: The joint is out of time (he throws it away). Oh cursèd rite,

That gives me rebirth from a godling's spite!

(He glances at the agents)

No one these days

Appreciates the classics.

The Agents: …

The Lizard King: Let me explain,

A story that you apes will understand.

I am the mastermind; this is my (evil) lair,

You are all in my power – it but remains

To throw you in the deathtrap

– or else to cut a deal.

(aside, to The Audience): I've caught up on your arts,

since last we spoke. I think I'll get a cat.

Agent 3: What deal is this? Who are you?

The Lizard King: If it helps you think,

Call me the Snake. I offer you an apple,

Take a bite. The hook is buried deep,

I've bigger fish to fry.

Agent 1: But where's McFadden?

The Lizard King: Fool flying high, McFadden lies,

His bones were made in ‘copter days,

A curl of time enfolds his eyes,

Nothing about him doth fade,

For his space-time doesn’t change

Yet he brings gifts, both rich and strange,

Yearly sends out his death knell,

And now it's rung The Stranger's bell.

(beat)

Call me The Stranger, and I'll let you go.

McFadden, too, I will extract,

A token of good will.

Agent 1: The… Stranger? Who?

The Lizard King: Who are you,

Who does not know the Phantom bringing Truth?

Oh blinded mice, see how you run!

He speaks behind a mask, he tells you

Where to point your little gun.

Agent 2: I think he means… Alphonse?

The Lizard King: I'm counting down,

Your heartbeats, little ape. Contrary to myth

Cold blood does not bring patience.

Call him now. And tell him what I want.

Agent 1 slowly reaches into his pocket and produces a mobile phone. The lights fade out. Downstage a spotlight appears, catching The Stranger, who picks up a ringing phone and listens. He speaks, but we do not hear what he says. Facing away from The Audience, The Stranger removes his white mask, takes a reptilian mask (which looks almost identical to The Lizard King) from his bag, wears it, and places the white mask over it. The spotlight goes out.

## Scene 4.

The lights come up, revealing The Stranger being confronted by The Tcho Tcho. As the Tcho Tcho move to attack, The Stranger removes his white mask, revealing the reptilian mask. The Tcho Tcho stop, confused. After a few seconds, one bows to The Stranger, gesturing him across the stage. The Lizard King enters from that side.

The Lizard King: Greetings, Stranger.

You have come, as was foretold.

You are acting, as you are meant to act.

Do say your piece.

The Stranger: Old Fork-tongue,

You should have stayed asleep.

Your time's long gone – you linger yet

Cold blooded menace, but an empty threat.

I know the words that bind you, creeping worm.

The Lizard King: Impossible. Kull's line is gone,

Valusia lost, beyond

The memory of apes.

The Stranger: Yet here I stand,

Establishing the truth.

Here and tremble at the words I utter,

Ka nama kaa lajerama!

(An awkward pause, until The Lizard King commences a hissing, rattling laugh).

The Lizard King: "Oh, Br'er Fox, please don't throw me in the briar patch!"

Oh phantom wit, oh pallid mask!

You spoke the words, invoked the leprous King,

Cousin's undoing, be my rebirthing!

He comes, he comes!

Yhtill! Yhtill! Yhtill!

The Stranger draws a gun. A thick yellow curtain falls.

## Scene 4.

The Agents and The Stranger, who is still wearing the reptilian mask, are sitting around a table, drinking and smoking.

Agent 1: How the hell did you get out?

The Stranger: (laughs) That's classified. I could tell you, but

Agent 1: Then you'd have to kill me? That joke's too old.

As is this game, cat and mouse with gods,

Too often, I'm the mouse. No more, I quit.

And No more "Agent Jones", my name is Sand.

(He removes his black hat and sunglasses and tosses them on the table).

Agent 2: And I am Smith. (pause, in which he also removes hat and sunglasses)

What? Someone has to be.

Agent 3: Oh fine. I'm Albert. And honestly,

I prefer Agent Jack.

(to The Stranger, while removing his hat and glasses) What about you?

Open up for once. Remove the mask.

The Stranger: Is it time?

Agent 1: Indeed, it's time. We have all laid aside

disguise but you.

The Stranger: I wear no mask.

Agent 2: (Terrified, aside to Agent 1) No mask? No mask!

The Stranger, who is perhaps The Lizard King, rises to his feet. He seems to loom above the table, stretching out his arms to engulf all present.

**Curtain.**

From behind the curtain, shots, screams, and an unpleasant gobbling, rending noise are heard. Slightly disconcerted, The Audience rises and exits the theatre. As they do so, there is a rain of frogs. This is a surreal coincidence.

**Open Act II**

## Director's Notes

Seeing as revealing one's allusions and further details is all the rage in this year's Shotgun Scenarios, but presenting stats for mine would be to go from the surreal to the ridiculous, I here present the Director's Commentary special soundtrack instead.

Lovecraft had a horror of ambiguity and collapsing boundaries and categories: between races, between species, between life and death, between space and time, and between description and actuality. On the gaming table, this translates into use of the motif of harmful sensation (information, knowledge, sights, sounds etc that can harm or kill, example par excellence The King In Yellow, incorporated in the CoC system by the SAN and Cthulhu Mythos game mechanics) and fourth wall breakage, that is, blurring the boundaries between player and character (i.e. the game Power Kill, or "Psych Eval") or, in a theatrical or movie sense, interaction between the actors or their fictional world and the audience, something at which TKIY again excels. Since Mark loved his surreal movies, I've written the scenario around these themes. The most obvious ambiguity is whether this is a story/play/scenario about a group of DG agents, or about a group of players.

Prelude

The Lizard King, a Serpent Man, lies in state on an elaborate stone bier. As the curtain retracts, it brushes against his foot, causing him (it?) to open his eyes and taste the air with his tongue. Abruptly, he coils himself upon the bier and flows to the ground, before standing to address The Audience.

The Lizard King: I wake. Again. The time's not right,

Our stars are sunken, gravid with their sleep,

And I alone to witness.

[snip]

With time, descend to where my cousins are

A witless hunt of ghosts, forgetting all

But what they might have been, slamming

The door in vain upon the Pallid Mask?
This is a reference to the ideas I explored in more detail in message 22029

No, I'll not.

For though the realm of Ghatanathoa be sunk,

Great R'lyeh drown'd, and wondrous Thule

now home to maggot-apes and monsters

still are they mappèd in the blood and bones

of these, our slaves, who ape their masters

piling stone on stone - a worthy task

for those unfit for freedom

to build the yoke I'll place upon their necks.

Where heavens fail, the mounded earth shall answer.
A feature of SE Asian religious architecture in general and Khmer/Angkorean architecture in particular is the use of various measurements and ratios connected with periods of time and space that appear in Hindu mythologies about the structure of the universe. A well-designed Angkorean temple is a quantatively accurate microcosm of the entire Hindu/Buddhist cosmos. They also make great use of perceptual tricks to make corridors, heights, etc seem much longer or larger than they are (something I spent a lot of time attempting to photograph). The general connection with Lovecraftian non-Euclidian architecture is obvious.

Conspiracy theorist Graham Hancock claims that the layout of the greater Angkor complex is based upon the constellation of Draco, or the Dragon, which was in the ascendancy about 10,500 BC, or Valusian times in a REH timeline.

The labyrinth is builded, and time's flow
Is dammed and swirls; the flotsam there
is fitted to my hand. There I'll lure
The Stranger to my trap, unwitting
The biter bit, the spider spun
within a web of stone!
Where cousins failed, I will tread
A path to reach the stars, and pile them high
Around me as the jewels of apish kings.
Playing with the idea (stolen from Pratchett's Pyramids) that the time-oriented architecture might enable time to be reversed, eddy, or rupture within it. The Stranger is another name for The Phantom of Truth. The Serpent King's plot should be clear from message 22029. The connection between TKIY and classical SE Asian culture is more than hinted at by the name of one of Angkor's more enigmatic monuments, "the Terrace of the Leper King", also Geertz' "Theatre State" paradigm of pre-modern SE Asian kingship.

Or die, or eddy endlessly myself,
‘tis better than to sleep once more in stone. Exit
Scene 1

Enter The Agents, wearing black hats, sunglasses, and suits and carrying chairs, and The Stranger.
The Agents’ phones all ring. The ring tone for each one is "The Ride of the Valkyries". They answer the phones.
Apocalypse Now. Also, Opera.

The Stranger: You are invited to a Night at the Opera.
[snip]
Agent 2: Just so we're clear – no more castrati.
Agent 3: Yeah, what was that?
Roman Polanski's Wild House of Pain?
Agent 2: Where all the children were insane.
Agent 3: And whacking off for the summoning.
The sound of helicopters is momentarily heard off-stage. It appears to go unnoticed.
These lines are a mashup of the lyrics of "The End" by The Doors, the *Apocalypse Now* opening theme.

The Agents, in unison: Yech!
[snip]
Exit Agents.
Scene 2
Sound: A medley of air travel noises is heard, followed by the chaotic noise of a SE Asian cityscape.
The Stranger removes the screen and intercom from the table. He takes from the bag a large, straw Panama hat, which he wears, a bottle of Mekhong whiskey, and a glass, which he fills from the bottle before placing them on the bier.
Enter Agents.
Agent 1 (to The Stranger): Are you Mac Feyd?
Coincidence. Gotta be a coincidence, right?

The Stranger (in a Texan drawl): Yep.
[snip]
The Stranger: Probably some whacked-out vet
High on speed, ya ba, and memory

Trying to relive the glory days, a helicopter ace

His dick's his joystick and a mattress

In a rice field brothel, his cockpit.

I've now seen hundreds of them, it

Happens all the time.

Agent 1: You're kidding.

The Stranger: Situation normal. All Fucked Up.

(Beat)
Sadly true. I recommend "Off the Rails in Phnom Penh" for background on this sort of thing.

The Stranger: OK, OK. I got your stuff,

The maps, the sat shots, all that shit.

(He places a map on the table)

Your temple is right here, on the Nung River.
More Apocalypse Now references.

To get you there, I got some native guides.

These guys fought for us in the war,

They'll do you right. They're in the back.

Enter three Tcho-Tcho. They smile, nod, and shake hands with The Agents.

Agent 1: OK, let's go.
I forgot to add that the Tcho Tcho should be dressed in wildly different historical styles.

The Tcho-Tcho have no speaking parts, because this would upset the numerology of the casting credits.

Exit The Stranger.

Scene 3. Backdrop: Jungle. Flickering lights.

The scene commences with a stylised combat between The Agents and The Tcho Tcho. The Tcho Tcho's bodies seem to distort, extend and contract and flow around The Agents. The shadows on the wall behind the combat show men struggling with giant, predatory insects. The Agents are rapidly overpowered and immobilised.
Tcho-fu. Also a reference to the DNA-assimilationist Tcho-Tcho model.

Enter The Lizard King, smoking a reefer. The Agents are shocked.

The Lizard King: The joint is out of time (he throws it away). Oh cursed rite,

That gives me rebirth from a godling's spite!

(He glances at the agents)

No one these days

Appreciates the classics.
Hamlet, Act 1, Scene 5

The Agents: …

The Lizard King: Let me explain,

A story that you apes will understand.

I am the mastermind; this is my (evil) lair,

You are all in my power – it but remains

To throw you in the deathtrap

– or else to cut a deal.

(aside, to The Audience): I've caught up on your arts,

since last we spoke. I think I'll get a cat.
The "arts" in this case obviously include Bond films.

Agent 3: What deal is this? Who are you?

The Lizard King: If it helps you think,

Call me the Snake. I offer you an apple,

Take a bite. The hook is buried deep,

I've bigger fish to fry.

Agent 1: But where's McFadden?

The Lizard King: Fool flying high, McFadden lies,

His bones were made in ‘copter days,

A curl of time enfolds his eyes,

Nothing about him doth fade,

For his space-time doesn’t change

Yet he brings gifts, both rich and strange,

Yearly sends out his death knell,

And now it's rung The Stranger's bell.
The Tempest, Act I, scene II

Call me The Stranger, and I'll let you go.

McFadden, too, I will extract,

A token of good will.

Agent 1: The… Stranger? Who?

The Lizard King: Who are you,

Who does not know the Phantom bringing Truth?

Oh blinded mice, see how you run!

He speaks behind a mask, he tells you

Where to point your little gun.

Agent 2: I think he means… Alphonse?
Delta Green is a mythos cult, and its Great Old One is called A Cell.

The Lizard King: I'm counting down,

Your heartbeats, little ape. Contrary to myth

Cold blood does not bring patience.

Call him now. And tell him what I want.

[snip]

Scene 4.

The lights come up, revealing The Stranger being confronted by The Tcho Tcho. As the Tcho Tcho move to attack, The Stranger removes his white mask, revealing the reptilian mask. The Tcho Tcho stop, confused. After a few seconds, one bows to The Stranger, gesturing him across the stage. The Lizard King enters from that side.

The Lizard King: Greetings, Stranger.

You have come, as was foretold.

You are acting, as you are meant to act.

Do say your piece.

[snip]

The Stranger: Yet here I stand,

Establishing the truth.

Here and tremble at the words I utter,

Ka nama kaa lajerama!

(An awkward pause, until The Lizard King commences a hissing, rattling laugh).

The Lizard King: "Oh, Br'er Fox, please don't throw me in the briar patch!"

Oh phantom wit, oh pallid mask!

You spoke the words, invoked the leprous King,

Cousin's undoing, be my rebirthing!

He comes, he comes!

Yhtill! Yhtill! Yhtill!
"Ka nama kaa lajerama" can be read as distorted (or primordial) Malay or Sanskrit for "in the name of the yellow god". Those who use the phrase are unwittingly evoking TKIY's aid to "remove the mask" of the serpent men. Hence Kull's descent from man of action to decadent abstraction.

The Stranger draws a gun. A thick yellow curtain falls.

Scene 4.

The Agents and The Stranger, who is still wearing the reptilian mask, are sitting around a table, drinking and smoking.

[snip]

Agent 3: Oh fine. I'm Albert. And honestly,

I prefer Agent Jack.

(to The Stranger, while removing his hat and glasses) What about you?

Open up for once. Remove the mask.

The Stranger: Is it time?

Agent 1: Indeed, it's time. We have all laid aside

disguise but you.

The Stranger: I wear no mask.

Agent 2: (Terrified, aside to Agent 1) No mask? No mask!
The King In Yellow: Act I Scene 2d.

The Stranger, who is perhaps The Lizard King, rises to his feet. He seems to loom above the table, stretching out his arms to engulf all present. Curtain. From behind the curtain, shots, screams, and an unpleasant gobbling, rending noise are heard. Slightly disconcerted, The Audience rises and exits the theatre. As they do so, there is a rain of frogs. This is a surreal coincidence.

Open Act II
"The very banality and innocence of the first act only allowed the blow to fall afterward with more awful effect."

## Credits

Presenting The Lizard King, in Yellow Fever was written by James Haughton for the 2009 shotgun scenario contest.