Emperor Catastrophe Cerneu

File:Emperor Catastrophe final road.png
**Emperor Catastrophe the Wise** (b. April 5, 1177 - July 13, 1234), originally **King Catastrophe the Just** was the first Emperor of Cornwall, the sixth Monarch of Cornwall, the fifth de-facto Monarch of Brittany and its second official King, and the founder and first King of Ireland.

His father was Disaster Cerneu.

Chosen from the many children of House Cerneu as the heir to Queen Yuselass the Holy, King Disaster was considered the best equipped to continue the Queen's plan for the eventual creation of a new Empire. His high attributes at a young age had him be chosen for the position and her prayers kept him from following in King Connor the Seducer's steps, as he chose the war training path instead.

Upon reaching 18, he was thrust into the position of Monarch with Yuselass' death and he tried to follow in the steps given to him. However, he was stymied constantly. To found an Empire, he needed great prestige, which he attempted, and failed, to gain from no less than **four** excommunication wars. This seems strange, as Yuselass was unequivocally a very pious person. Added to this, Yuselass miscalculated in arranging his marriage, leading him to much grief. At 18, he found himself a King without heirs and worse, without close relatives that he could marry for non-aggression pacts. In fact, the only non-aggressive pact he remained with was one he didn't want: his Scottish princess wife of over 30 years old which appeared, year by year, that would not produce him any heirs. King Catastrophe wasn't too much invested in having heirs, as he had an entire prosperous House to choose a successor, however he needed them for political gains. As his wife reached 45 and on the consultation of medics who claimed women became infertile at that age, he attempted to have her assassinated, but was dismayed that no one was interested in joining the plot. Out of desperation, he sent her under the cover of spying to several disease-riddled places in the world, yet she survived unscathed.

Still, by the age of 30, he had amassed half the needed prestige, through great risk to the realm, including the founding of the Kingdoms of Ireland and Brittany, as well as (pre-planned since Yuselass' rule) bi-annual fairs. On the other side, his vassals became emboldened by the realm's expansion, going against holdings of England and chipping away at it, leaving it to 7 counties with the secession of the Duchy of Kent, much to King Catastrophe's displeasure, who at one point commented that his vassals may have become a greater threat to the Kingdom than England and Mercia were at their height. Now all he needed was to survive to gather the other half...

He lived through such trying times for his dynasty as the expansions of both the Holy Roman Empire and the Kingdom of France into half of the Kingdom of Spain, as well as the integration of France into the HRE, as well as the practical dissolution of England at the hands of his very vassals. This became more upsetting not only because his vassals' increase in power, but because it stopped him from directly conquering the title of the Kingdom of England once he'd become an Emperor. He also saw the largest inter-vassal battles in his territory, with a total of over ten thousand troops fighting on different sides within his territory, and although he could field up to 15 thousand, this had to have made him nervous. He also saw the attempt at conquest from one of his own kinsman with outside troops of around 15 thousands for the Kingdom of Brittany, however he was lucky that they were shipped to the territory of the Kingdom of Wales 2000 each, resulting in him winning the battle and imprisoning the leader before they could bring the full forces upon Brittany itself.

Up until 1223, he continued to send his wife, who at that time turned 65, into plague zones hoping she would die. Although that was not the case, Denmark managed to imprison her and her general reputation fell through, also removing her from the council. With a masterful spymaster replacement, King Catastrophe revisited the option to have her assassinated and on October decided to reattempt the plan. On January 24 the next year he was approached with the information that his court physician hired carpenters to saw through the railings on a balcony she spends time on, and he approved the plan. On February 26, the plot succeeded with no ties to the (many conspirators), finally releasing King Catastrophe from his catastrophic marriage at 46. He originally decided to marry a Princess, but then realized "all the good ones are taken and he'd have to murder their husbands". He *then* decided that he'd sacrificed enough for the realm and he'd marry a woman he actually desired and who could give him exceptional children. However, he *then* realized this would lose him prestige and as he was at 7500 already, a mere 500 from being able to create his Empire, he decided to wait until he became Emperor. On June 4, 1277 he chose his wife Wulflhyth of Wessex of 17 based on her virtues of Charismatic Negotiator, Diligent, Patient and Zealous, the marriage taking place on June 18.

During his searches, he found a two year old Princess of the HRE, but although he had no intention of betrothing her, he found an excellent occasion to remove the threat of the HRE to his realm by betrothing his first son, Joy Cerneu to Princess Cathérine of the HRE.

1225 was a great year for Catastrophe, in fact. Besides his wife's death and the non-aggression pact he was able to seal with the HRE, his winter feast managed to gather all but 5 bishops, as their negative view on his perceived tyranny 30 years before finally expired. On February 25, 1225 at age 47 he received his permanent epithet, King Catastrophe the Just. Though he wished it and became more frantic by the day, even refusing to hunt the White Stag, he did not go to 8000 prestige that year, though he was fairly close (in less than 50 prestige from his goal). This goal was finally achieved on February 14, 1227 and he immediately founded the Empire of Cornwall and became its first Emperor at the age of 49.

On December 3, 1277 he took advantage of England's peace period and the fact that he owned indirectly over 50% of the territories of de jure England and declared himself King of England from former King Wulfgeat of England, however she died under mysterious circumstances on May 13, 1229 after it appeared she had the flu, without giving any children, though she was pregnant at the time. Hushed voices claimed it was not the Emperor's child however. His next plan was to marry Queen Máire of Kent, the only still able independent successor state of England, which was agreed to on May 31. The marriage was officiated on August 25, 1230. On May 28, 1232 she died in battle, deciding to lead Kent from the front lines. His third choice was Countess Beorthwaru of Lancaster of House Bacon chosen on June 17

He had a great respect for his predecessor Yuselass, considering he was following in her plans. He invested heavily on the Barony of Yuselass, a castle she had commissioned and that was named in her honor just before she died. He credited many of his more precarious military successes on this castle in which he invested heavily to train troops.

As he became older and infirm, one of his joys was witnessing the civil war taking place in the HRE against its Jewish faith Emperor.

Despite previously being diagnosed with cancer, on September 16, 1233 he became the Magus of the Hermetic Society.

He was a known poet, as well as the inventor and the holder of the first handgun in the world.

On February 15, 1234 he started his attempt at writing his very own Magnum Opus. On April 3, however he became Incapable. Despite this, he wrote feverishly of the stars until his death on July 13, finally succumbing to cancer.

He was the longest lived King until his rule.

He was succeeded by Emperor Michel Ironside, with only the Kingdom of England going to his first son, King Joy of England.