2017 Trophy Naming Tournament - Elite Eight

<---Sweet Sixteen

## Introduction

Sixteen has been chopped to eight in another very close round of the trophy naming tournament. Through eight votes half of the matchups were tied up at 50/50! In the end seven of the eight ended 5-4.

Through two rounds the trophy naming tournament is proving itself to be more exciting than the actual NFL playoffs, with upsets galore and a Cinderella story shaping up to be one for the ages.

The schedule for the rest of the tournament is as follows:

1/29 Pro Bowl Sunday: Final Four Revealed

2/1 Wednesday: Championship Matchup Revealed

2/5 Super Bowl Sunday: Winner revealed

Then I guess I'll have to find some other way to occupy our fantasy football off-season time.

## Sweet Sixteen Results

### The Eternal Cup of Glory (5) vs. The Brian Westbrook (4)

The Brian Westbrook put up way more of a fight than I expected, leading 4-3 through 7 votes. But back to back nods for the ECG sent Westbrook back into retirement.

### The Big Sack Cup (5) vs. The Brophy (4)

The Brophy was sent packing by our ninth voter after leading 4-2 through 6 votes. The elimination of the Brophy ensures us we will have a name that accepts both genders as equal. Guess the women's march worked after all.

### The F.A.T.E. (9) vs. The Best of the Best Trophy (1)

STOP THE FIGHT, THAT TROPHY NAME HAS A FAMILY! The F.A.T.E absolutely demolishes the BotB and has now accumulated 15 votes through 2 rounds, five more than the next best name. The F.A.T.E is well on its way to winning the popular vote, but did it canvas enough in the swing states to win the electoral votes?

### The Roger Goodell Memorial Trophy (5) vs. The Guru Goblet (4)

It is more probable than not that Roger moves on to the elite eight following another 4-4 tiebreak on the last vote. Goodell has already said he would not be attending the F.A.T.E. game and instead would visit the Georgia Dome for the Brophy vs. Westbrook consolation match.

### The Rainbow Sprinkle Cup (5) vs. The Champion's Cup (4)

Witchita State is moving on to the Elite Eight! The clock has yet to strike midnight on this improbable run. The Champion's Cup, which on paper didn't look like a competitor that had what it took to take down the Rainbow, was getting trounced 5-2 before winning the last two votes to make this one look a lot closer on the final scoreboard.

### The Snapface (5) vs. The Goblet of the Gods (4)

The Gods could not be reached for comment after their one-and-done performance in the Naming Tournament. Neither could the noun "goblet," which runneth over with L's after the Sweet Sixteen.

### The Full-On Rapist (5) vs. The Holy Grail (4)

In the upset that will have everyone talking, the Rapist beat the Holy Grail, proving once and for all that Christianity is way overrated. Tim Tebow, QB for the Holy Grail, put up a decent fight but was no match for Big Ben and his team of sinners. The Holy Grail is the only member of the first four to not make it beyond the Sweet Sixteen.

### The Salty Dolphin (5) vs. The Elite Trophy of Excellence (4)

Looks like the question of whether this town was big enough for an Elite Trophy and an Eternal Trophy has been answered. Eternity wins out. The Salty Dolphin escapes the net and lives to be sushi another day.

## The Bracket

By the way, I know the quality of the photos doesn't appear great but by clicking on the image you will enhance the resolution.

## The Elite Eight

With the majority of the teams eliminated, we now have eight teams all with the potential to capture the trophy. In this round you will be awarded 20 points towards your off-season point total if your name advances. As the only person who is privvy to whose names are whose I can tell you that three managers are completely eliminated from the tournament, while only one manager still has two names alive.

### North Division

Is any team strong enough in the north to take out F.A.T.E.?

#### The Eternal Cup of Glory vs. The Big Sack Cup

The Big Sack Cup had a big come-from-behind victory (come from behind...nice) in the sweet sixteen and faces off against the Eternal Cup, which has two wins under its belt and a come-from-behind victory of its own. The Eternal Cup of Glory speaks to the magnitude of the accomplishment, while the Big Sack Cup honors the bravery it took to get there. Both have positive attributes but the winner will no doubt be an underdog in the Final Four. There are sure to be fireworks in this cup on cup throwdown.

#### The F.A.T.E. vs. The Roger Goodell Memorial Trophy

A matchup worthy of the Final Four, we instead have to say goodbye to one of these names in the Elite Eight. The F.A.T.E. has rolled over its competition and is the only name to win by more than one vote (and it has happened twice). While The Roger Goodell Memorial Trophy sounds more like the name of a trophy (it even has "trophy" in the title), The F.A.T.E. is more in tune with the message of the league and seems to have connected with voters. We will learn this week if the F.A.T.E. is real or if it has been graced with the easiest schedule.

### South Division

Four unique names face off in the south and I have a feeling another round of 5-4 splits is in order.

#### The Rainbow Sprinkle Cup vs. The Snapface

Does the Patriots trip to the Super Bowl give The Snapface a boost in this tournament, or are its chances hurt by the fact that there are members of the league who are not Patriots fans? For the Rainbow Sprinkle Cup, is this where the miraculous ride ends? Or is the magical trip going to continue into the Final Four?

#### The Full-On Rapist vs. The Salty Dolphin

In a shocker, the Full-On Rapist meets with the Salty Dolphin. The dolphins are a species known for forcing themselves on humans, at least according to the internet, so this matchup should be closer than expected. The FOR is definitely the villain of the tournament. Does their path of destruction continue or can The Salty Nate's...sorry, Dolphins...take them down? This may be Trump's America, but what do we want our trophy to reflect: Nate's pain or forced sexual encounters?

## VOTE

Voting closes Friday with the Final Four revealed around Pro-Bowl kickoff on Sunday.

VOTE HERE