Life Hereafter

**Life Hereafter** is a song from the Disney plus Muppet special Muppet Haunted Mansion.

## Lyrics

### Regular version

Ghost Host (spoken): We now invite you to sit back and relax, as our 999 residents proudly present... your funeral.

**[Kermit]**
Welcome to the life hereafter
Sleepless nights, eternal laughter
Buy the farm, push up some daisies

Muppet Monsters:

Then get down with us creepy crazies

Clean Gene (spoken): Hi, wanna come play with me?

Ghost Host:

Frights du jour

Ghost:

And daily nightmares

Mummy and Duddy:

Ghoulish scares to raise your neck hairs

Ghost Host:

If you think it's too macabre, follow the floating candelabra
Rizzo the Rat:

But he ain't French and he can't croon

Yolanda:

We did that in a beastly cartoon

Ghost Host (spoken):

She was a beauty

Ghost Host:
We'll never rest, we'll never cease
'Till you finally rest in peace
**Chip**
You can fly and you can float
**[Scooter]**
Or you can scream just like a goat
[Goat scream]

**[Kermit]**
But to grant your endless wishes
**[Squid]**
First you must sleep down with the fishes
Pepe (spoken):

Hey! Hold on, I'm not sleepy! (screams)

Kermit:

Rain or snow

Ghost Host:

Lightning or thunder

Frackles:

The party is down here six feet under

Frackle:

Trick or treat!

Mo:

Take a smell of my feet

Big Mean Carl:

And gimme something good to eat

Ghost Host:

You're all alone, but don't be scared

We've got your wake all pre-prepared

Howard (spoken): Hi, I'm serving soup. It's a cream mock tortoise and a yummy red that pairs with rigor mortis. (laughs)

Statler (spoken):

It's all so dopey. I'm complaining.

Waldorf (spoken): At least it's almost entertaining.

Statler and Waldorf:

(laughing)

Waldorf (spoken): Uh-Oh!

Statler (spoken): Huh? What the--

Announcer (spoken): Your attention, please. Restless spirits have halted our progress. Please remain seated in your doom buggy, and we will continue our tour momentarily.

Statler (spoken):

Oh, no. The only thing worse than being stuck in here with you is being stuck in here with them!

Statler and Waldorf:

(laughing)

Fozzie:

We tell jokes

Bobo:

I do tricks

Crazy Harry:

With my deadly candlesticks

Bobo (spoken):

Uh-oh.

Kermit:

Come on now and lift your glass

Ghost Host:

Filled with poison sassafras

The Swedish Chef:

(Speaking mock-Swedish)

Joe from Legal:

Sign your will, deed, and trust

'Cause it's time to bite the dust

All:

Cash in your chips, we're not joking

Now's the time you should be croaking

You're so great, none can compare

No one has your savoir faire

Ghost Host:

It's time to turn your whole life story

Into a memento mori

All:

Corpse by corpse and one by one

Until you shout, "My life is done"

Kermit:

So join us in this life hereafter

All:

Sleepless nights, eternal laughter

Sleepless nights, eternal laughter

Sleepless nights, eternal laughter

Sleepless nights, eternal laughter

Kermit:

And now the greatest act of all

Ghost Host:

It's Gonzo's final curtain call

All:

From the basement to the rafters

Join us in the great hereafter

You'll be great forever after

Muppet Monsters:

In our monstrous life hereafter

All:

For our afterparty afterlife

Rowlf (spoken):

Rest. In. Peace.

All (spoken):

R.I.P.!

### TBA version

**[Ryan "Evil Ryan" Landimister]**
(spoken)We now invite you to sit back and relax, as our 999 residents proudly present... your funeral.

**[Ryan Freestar]**
Welcome to the life hereafter
Sleepless nights, eternal laughter
Buy the farm, push up some daisies
**[The Blindings]**
Then get down with us creepy crazies
Nermal (spoken): Hi, wanna come play with me?

**[Ryan "Evil Ryan" Landimister]**
Frights du jour

Ghost: And daily nightmares

Peppa and Ryder: Ghoulish scares to raise your neck hairs

**[Sci-Ryan]**
If you think it's too macabre, follow the floating candelabra
Geo: But he ain't French and he can't croon

Milli: Ash did that in a beastly cartoon

Sprig: She was a beauty

**[Ryan "Evil Ryan" Landimister]** We'll never rest, we'll never cease, 'till you finally rest in peace
Ash Ketchum: You can fly and you can float

Bot: Or you can scream just like a goat

Goat: [scream]

Ryan Freestar: But to grant your endless wishes

Aylin, Brock and Misty: First you must sleep down with the fishes.

Ryvine Sparktron (spoken): Hey! Wait a second! I'm not sleepy!

Ryan Freestar: Rain or snow

Ryan "Evil Ryan" Landimister: Lighting or thunder

The DuckTales gang: The party is down here 6 feet under.

Dave Tyson: Trick or treat

The Flea: Take a smell of Flea's feet

Logan Bandicoot: And give me something good to eat.

**[Ryan "Evil Ryan" Landimister]**
You're all alone, but don't be scared
Sean Carolglow: We've got your wake all pre-prepared

Hop Pop (spoken): Hi, I'm serving soup. It's a cream mock tortoise and a yummy red that pairs with rigor mortis. (laughs)

Wilton Haroldson (spoken): It's all so dopey.

Tabby Morrigan: I'm complaining.

Carson Jason(spoken): At least it's almost entertaining.

[The two laugh then the power comes down]

Carson Jason: What the?

Announcer: (spoken) Your attention, please. Restless spirits have halted our progress. Please remain seated in your doom buggy, and we will continue our tour momentarily.

Wardrobe: Oh, no. The only thing worse than being stuck in here with you is being stuck in here with them!

[They laughs with the two Muppets]

Ryan Heretic: We tell jokes

Oisin Carolglow: I do tricks

Crash Bandicoot: With my deadly candlesticks

[Boom!]

Crash Bandicoot: [laughs]

Cuphead:

Come on now and lift your glass

Bertram T. Monkey:

Filled with poison sassafras

The Swedish Chef:

(Speaking mock-Swedish)

Milo Murphy:

Sign your will, deed, and trust

'Cause it's time to bite the dust

All:

Cash in your chips, we're not joking

Now's the time you should be croaking

You're so great, none can compare

No one has your savoir faire

**[Ryan "Evil Ryan" Landimister]**
It's time to turn your whole life story

Into a memento mori

All:

Corpse by corpse and one by one

Until you shout, "My life is done"

Embeth and Ryan:

So join us in this life hereafter

All:

Sleepless nights, eternal laughter

Sleepless nights, eternal laughter

Sleepless nights, eternal laughter

Sleepless nights, eternal laughter

Meg Griffin:

And now the greatest act of all

Sean Trayson:

It's Linda's final curtain call

All:

From the basement to the rafters

Join us in the great hereafter

You'll be great forever after

Muppet Monsters:

In our monstrous life hereafter

All:

For our afterparty afterlife

Terra Agatha (spoken):

Rest. In. Peace.

All (spoken):

R.I.P.!