Synopsis

## Hélène is A slut and Anatole is a Hot: Act Раз!

Moscow, 1812, just before Napoleon’s invasion of Russia and the burning of the city. As the story begins and the characters are introduced ("Prologue”), we meet Pierre, a wealthy aristocrat having an existential crisis, living a slothful life of wine, philosophy and inaction ("Pierre"). Meanwhile, the young, newly engaged Natasha Rostova and her cousin Sonya arrive in Moscow to stay the winter with Marya D., Natasha’s godmother, while Natasha waits for her fiancé, Andrey, to return from the war ("Moscow"). Marya D. tells Natasha that she must visit her future in-laws, the demented, miserly old Prince Bolkonsky and his spinster daughter Mary (“The Private and Intimate Life of the House”), to win their affection and secure the marriage, which is critical to the Rostovs’ status and fortune. However, Natasha’s visit with Mary and Bolkonsky ends in disaster, as Mary dislikes Natasha and Old Bolkonsky is, well... miserable. (“Natasha & Bolkonskys”) and she leaves missing Andrey more than ever (“No One Else”).

### Part Два! : Hélène and Natasha Are Very Bi

The next night Natasha is introduced to decadent Moscow society at “The Opera”. Hélène Kuragina and Fedya Dolokhov are introduced. After the show she meets Anatole, a young officer and notorious rogue (“Natasha & Anatole”); their interaction leaves Natasha feeling confused and strangely attracted to Anatole, even though she is engaged to Andrey.

### Part Три! Pierre Is Sad and His Life Is Meaningless.

Anatole, his friend Dolokhov, and Pierre go out drinking; they are met by Hélène (Pierre's wife and Anatole's sister), who taunts Pierre. Anatole declares his intention to have Natasha, although he is already married. Pierre finds his wife's familiarity with Dolokhov offensive and challenges him to a duel, almost getting himself killed ("The Duel") and missing the only shot he takes in the musical, even though he is a "Crazy Good Shot". Afterward, Pierre reflects on his life ("Dust and Ashes"), and Natasha and her family go to church ("Sunday Morning"). Hélène then arrives to the house and seduces Natasha into coming with her to the ball that night ("Charming"), where Anal Toe also seduces Natasha and creepily proclaims his love for "little girls" because he is A Creep. ("The Ball").

## Pure Chaos: Act Два!

### Natasha Makes Lots Of Stupid Decisions

Anatole and Natasha make plans to elope, and Natasha breaks off her engagement with Andrey (“Letters”). Sonya finds out about the plan after reading Anatole's letters to Natasha and realizes it will mean Natasha’s ruin. Natasha argues that she and Anatole are "in love" and ends up yelling that she hates Sonya. (“Sonya & Natasha”) Sonya is determined to not let Natasha destory her own life, as no one cares for Natasha as much as her. (“Sonya Alone”). That evening Anatole and Dolokhov plan for the elopement (“Preparations”) and call on their untrustwrothy troika driver, Balaga, to take them to Natasha’s house ("Balaga"). However, “The Abduction” is thwarted at the last moment by Marya D., who catches the Anal toe as he attempts to sneak onto the porch and whoops his ass.

### Marya Turns Into A Dragon and Kills Everyone

After screaming at a grief-stricken Natasha for her questionable decisions (“In My House”), Marya D. sends out “A Call to Pierre,” asking him to help handle the crisis. Pierre finds and kicks Anatole out of Moscow, after sufficiently scolding him for what he's done to Natasha (“Find Anatole”/”Pierre & Anatole”). Natasha poisons herself (“Natasha Very Ill”), and Andrey returns. Pierre explains the scandal to him and asks him to be compassionate, but Andrey is unable to forgive Natasha (“Pierre & Andrey”). Finally, Pierre visits Natasha (“Pierre & Natasha”). After their meeting, Pierre experiences a moment of enlightenment while seeing “The Great Comet of 1812” in the night sky.