Vote of Confidence

Vote of Confidence is the ninth chapter in the Wombles Eight.

In Star City Johnny the Horse was talking to Walter Steele.  “So, Walter baby!  What do you think?” he asked.  “Well weapons and ballistics bring us quite a bit of money.  As do supporting the corrupt rich heart of the city.  It is not a good move to run the company in a fairer more moral way.” Walter replied in a serious tone.

“Well Walter you know that my bro and curvy Queen Cathy are not happy with the supporting crime!” Johnny replied.  Walter looked scathingly at Johnny as he retorted “Really?  They want us to behave morally by killing children, working with TODE, poisoning people with cider, squashing people into purple peanuts, strapping them to conveyor belts to be cut in half, marrying everybody in sight, taking advantage of people made to act like dogs and constantly get drunk?”

“You know that my bro didn’t mean that stuff!” shouted Johnny.  “And it’s fine that his children are over here in Star City after toddling unattended into a car, which got dragged along by the Flash into a cruise liner, fell off the side into a motor boat which they accidentally started, that came into Gotham Harbour where they were thrown into the air, landed in a helicopter which landed on a battlecruiser, which came into port at Star City where I found them crying?” shouted back Walter.

“Well that was their bad but sooo easy to do!  Anybody could do that man!” said an exasperated Johnny.  “Anyway the future direction of this company is now down to the vote of the board.  And they will vote to continue as we are.” Walter said as they entered the boardroom. Johnny carried in Thomas and Lucy behind him.

The meeting lasted for about two hours.  Finally it came to the vote.  Walter asked the board “Do you wish to continue with the current strategy?  Or move into the club and alcohol industry as suggested by Mr Horse?”  Everybody put their vote into the ballot box.  It was taken out of the room by Walter’s secretary.  “Thank you Phillip” said Walter.  Johnny counted the votes.

Meanwhile the strange meteorites were now heading into the Atlantic.  A head popped up and started watching them.  “What!  My ocean is under attack!” it shouted.  “Weeeee cooooome iiiin peeeeaccce!” shouted back one of the meteorites, which looked like a white balloon.  “Who are you?” asked the head.  “Roooovvveeerr” replied the meteorite.  “Aaaannnddd IIIII’mmm Deeeeeeennnnniiisss!” replied the orange one with a weird face and horns.  “Thoooommmaasss!” shouted a smaller version of the orange one.  “Luuuccccyyy!” shouted a smaller version of the white one.

The head got taller. A body emerged which turned out to be Aquaman.  He hurled his trident at Rover but missed them all.  It was such a mighty throw that it hit a passing passenger plane. The plane now had a great big hole in it and the cabin was losing pressure.  It started to nosedive towards New York.

Meanwhile Superman was chatting to Sir The Flash in the Kent Batcave.  “You know Clark this really should be your place.” Barry said.  “How so?” asked Clark.  “Well it’s the Kent Batcave.  Could be changed to the Kentcave maybe?” replied Barry.  “Good point Barry I might just take it!” said Clark.  “But what about Bruce?” mused Barry.  “He’s fine with New Wayne Manor and his new cave.” Clark was just going to listen to Barry’s reply when he heard something.  “Trouble in New York!” he said and flew off.  Barry ran after him out of the cave then whirled his hands to fly alongside.

The pair reached the plane. Superman landed it at JFK whilst Sir The Flash ran off to find the trouble.  He found Aquaman moaning about his trident and shouting insults and two white balloons and two space hoppers.

At Grand Steed Manor there was a party.  All of the government were invited except for Face.  Murdock declined as he was busy with tiger feeding.  Actually Face was doing that still tied to the helicopter but Murdock took all the credit.  Taped Up Bulgaria was there but couldn’t eat or drink because Alderney wouldn’t untape him. She was telling the Queen that she should be Prime Minister as Bulgaria was weak and couldn’t even talk.

“What do you think John?” asked Cathy.  “Well it’s no use having a Prime Minister who can’t move his arms, walk or talk.  I vote for Alderney!” replied Steed.  “OK” said Cathy, who was pleased to be divorced from Paul, “You’re the new PM!”.

TUB jumped awkwardly out of the room but through a big window by mistake as he couldn’t see for tape over his eyes.  He fell down as Murdock’s helicopter flew by.  Face grabbed him and they flew off to feed another tiger.

Steed and Cathy quickly became unsure whether allowing Alderney to be the Prime Minister was a good idea or not.  It seemed to be causing a lot more crime than Screaming Throatily Uncle Bulgaria’s way of running the country.  But when Cathy pointed this out to Steed, he just shrugged and said, “Doesn’t affect us. Have some Gooseberry Cider.”

STUB was dangling above Steed Crater, which had now become a pit for the tigers.  Face had his eyes closed so he thought he was just carrying a very heavy piece of meat.  He thought it was Murdock screaming for no reason.  Murdock was too concentrated on piloting the helicopter to notice that Face was about to feed On The Verge Of Death But Still Screaming Throatily In The Hope That Someone Will Hear Him And Rescue Him Uncle Bulgaria to a pit of tigers.

Face let go of OTVODBSSTIHTSWHHARUB and Murdock flew away.  OTVODBSSTIHTSWHHARUB fell rapidly into the pit, and prepared for sharp teeth to sink into his body.  He kept waiting for it to happen, waiting fearfully, waiting hopelessly, waiting… impatiently.  Confused Uncle Bulgaria opened his eyes.  The tigers were all looking at him lovingly.  Was it CUB’s imagination, or did they think he was their cub?