07-27-2013 - Yo Holmes to Bel-Air

Length: 2 hours, 27 minutes, 04 seconds

twitter complainers, at&t, stupid bitch, kitchen, brick, neighbors, secret passage, cave, tunnels, bunker, lost city, pirate, booty, booby trap, gold bars, batcave, pussy lips, bone piano, killer robots, underground railroad, answering machines, voice mail, fresh prince

 Show Notes

Any time not accounted for is filled with music bits, talking, lot of phone ringing and RBCP bragging about the size of Roy's area.

00:01 RBCP was planning on doing an hour but Brent Westwood isn't doing a show due to a recurring rectum injury, so the show may be longer; Twitter complainers planning, Roy calls in to explain who RBCP actually is, and a MacGruber movie review.

02:20 Calling Beth, didn't work out so RBCP tried Sue who is unhappy with the customer service at Gloria's Restaurant in Plano, Texas. She didn't pick up.

03:49 – 05:31 Serge (RBCP) from Gloria's calls some unidentified guy in Plano.

06:04 Guitar solo

06:44 – 10:59 David (RBCP) from AT&T calls AT&T complainer Kevin in New Jersey, who can't text five digit numbers to radio stations, which David says a scam for stupid people. Kevin's wife can be heard in the background and after asking Kevin to “Tell that stupid bitch to shut up” and send her back to the kitchen, David clarifies with perfect logic that he called her a bitch, not a whore and Kevin hangs up mid-sentence.\*

11:21 Show is over while RBCP searches Google Maps for cul-de-sacs.

\*12:00 – 12:23 – Calling someone else as AT&T but RBCP realizes that Kevin never actually hung up and has been listening the entire time just before Kevin hits a bunch of touch tones and ends the call. RBCP speculates that he's been back-traced!

13:26 – 18:03 RBCP determines that Kevin in New Jersey dialed a 10 digit number so he tries various ways to decode the tones and finally hits paydirt at Slydial.com, only to find the ten digit number is the number RBCP called from!

18:24 RBCP leaves a message for KDK while he's looking for upscale neighborhoods to call.

21:10 – 26:50 David (RBCP) from next door calls Carolyn. Her husband answers and David complains about the one brick in their driveway is sticking up approximately 1/8-inch from the other bricks. David talks the guy into going out to his driveway to look for it while he's one the phone.

26:58 Tries to call the hobos across the street as David, no answer.

33:05 Fax machine

33:21- 38:09 Harold (RBCP) calls his neighbor K'Zuul to start a chain of secret passage calls within the neighborhood. She said she doesn't have a basement so Harold says he's under her house. Most of the calls that follow run along the same vein: RBCP found a secret door in his basement and is now lost in a series of tunnels, caverns, caves, rooms, and a lost city; and is under the mark's house he is calling. He finds all sorts of neat things in this underground labyrinth and wonders if who he is calling is entitled to a share of the goods.

38:25 – 42:33 Harold calls back and K'Zuul's husband answers. Talk of a secret wine cellar and gold bars found in the tunnels.

44:21 – 51:30 K'Zuul (RBCP) calls the next neighbor, finds a warning written in pirate language and a bone piano room; among other things.

53:05 – 55:26 Aaron (RBCP) calls his neighbor Moosa about the secret passage things. RBCP changes his name from from Aaron to Steven mid-call.

57:05 – 1:00:05 James (RBCP) calling neighbor Evelyn because he's under her house and needs help!

1:00:51 – 1:05:45 David (RBCP) calls James F. and also gets to talk with Mrs. F about the car he found under their house.

1:07:28 BREAKING NEWS: RIP Kidd Kraddick, whoever you are (not Kidd Chris)

1:10:20 – 1:13:25 James F. (RBCP) calls David about his passages and gets touchtone'D again! Going to Slydial with the tones, James finds himself connected to David's wife Terry's voicemail. Sloth ends up decoding the touch tones, giving James Terry's phone number.

1:15:21 – 1:22-18 James F. (RBCP) calls Terry, with David eventually getting on the line. It appears  James has found the Batcave.

1:25:21 – 1:31:09 James F. (RBCP) calls Charles and Florence about their secret passages.

1:32:44 – 1:38:00 James calls a female neighbor to tell her he can see her puffy pink pussy lips through the floorboards, because he's under her floor in the tunnels and she is wearing a skirt.

1:39:09 – 1:40:59 James (RBCP) calls Maria and Booker because he's lost under her backyard in a cave full of stuff.

1:41:19 – 1:42:27 James calls Maria and Booker's other number but no answer.

1:43:00 Fresh Prince Bel-Air loop created

1:44:45 Four hour mark of the live show

1:46:15 Douglas (RBCP) calls Antonio and leaves a long message for him to pickupickuppickup.

1:47:32 Calling Juan for help, no answer and still leaving a message on Antonio's machine.

1:48:55 Calling Donald for help, no answer and still leaving a message on Antonio's machine.

1:49:25 Antonio picks up finally, says something and hangs up.

1:50:00 – 02:02:49 Douglas (RBCP) calls Antonio back to link the passages to the Underground Railroad, which are filled with booby traps and cases of saltine crackers, as well as pirate booty. Douglas is attacked by killer robots, escapes, and is attacked again.

2:05:35 – 2:08:31 Ronald (RBCP) calls Ann S. because he's found a lost city under their neighborhood. RBCP changes his name to Josh mid-call.

2:09:03 Douglas leaving a message for Ali and starts another call;

2:10:38 – 2:17:55 Douglas (RBCP) calls Sally because of his discovery of a lost city under their neighborhood. Sally says an old Army general used to own their house so maybe it is his network of underground bunkers and fall-out shelters within a lost city that he left behind.  Seriously.  Then Douglas is attacked ALOT by an army of killer robots that protect the lost city.

2:18:34 Douglas leaves a message for Sophia

2:20:20 Douglas leaves a message for Andrew

2:20:34 Frank (RBCP) leaves a message for Judith

2:21:22 Steven (RBCP) leaves a message for Daniel but it is really Vlad.

2:21:55 Steven leaves a message for Roland.

RBCP said he has many answering machines still running from previous calls by time he was leaving a message for Roland.

2:22:12 End of show stuff, Mr. Roboto to end.