How Many Doctors Does It Take To Screw In A Lightbulb?

### Steven Moore, Violette Monet, Simmons Family Tree

How many doctors does it take to change a lightbulb? The family reunion of my girlfriend, Violette’s, family was starting to feel like a real life rendition of that joke.

So far, I had met her older brother, Dr. Teddy Monet, one of her cousins and his wife, Dr. Oliver Fitzsimmons and Dr. Louise Katz, and her grandparents, Dr. Richard Simmons and Dr. Cindy Madison, and we had only been here for 15 minutes so far.

I knew Violette came from a family of scientists, and was a scientist herself, a forensic anthropologist, and I had heard stories of the majority of her relatives having PhDs by the age of 17, but I hadn’t realized how many doctors that added up to.

“Having fun?” I jumped slightly, as I hadn’t heard Violette approach. I had left her deep in a conversation with her cousin about microbiology or something that I couldn’t follow. The cupcakes on the snack table were something I could understand, so I wandered over for some food.

“Come on, I’ve got more cousins to introduce you to,” This was the first time I was meeting any of her family, despite the fact that we had been dating for almost a year now.

We approached a group of people arguing enthusiastically. Exactly what I need, I thought sarcastically, to get in the middle of a scientific argument.

“I’m telling you, Aunt Penny’s jello salad is way better,”

Okay, maybe it wasn’t science

“Well, that’s because that is the only thing is knows how to make,” someone else responded with an eye roll, “and mac ‘n’ cheese”

“I thought your dad was lactose intolerant?” A third person interjected,

“He is,”

There was a lull in the conversation, and as I was trying to process everything I had just heard, Violette introduced me.

“Everyone, this is my boyfriend, FBI Agent Steven Moore,” I don’t know what it was about these people with full names and titles, but that is how every introduction had gone.

Violette had told me she is the second youngest of the cousins, and most people here were over 10 years older than us.

Violette pointed to each person as she introduced them to me, “This is Dr. James Fitzsimmons, Dr. Alex Kepler, Dr. Jessie Simmons, and Dr. Julian McKinley.”

“Nice to meet you,” James said, speaking for the group, everyone else smiled in agreement. Then came the dreaded question, “What do you do for the FBI; are you a scientist?”

Luckily, I was spared from answering as a little girl with blond pigtails came barreling into the group.

James picked her up, spinning her around and the two of them laughed.

“And this is Alex and my daughter, Madison,”

No doctor, that’s a relief, granted the girl couldn’t be more than 12, but still. This also gave me an indication of who was actually related to Violette. This task was a lot more difficult that I was anticipating. Because her family had lived all around the globe, the variety of accents, even within the blood relatives, was quite varying. Violette grew up in France, and had a heavy French accent. Oliver and James had British accents, as well as her grandparents, Louise was Australian (but I believed she is Oliver’s wife), Alex, Jessie, and Julian all had American accents. Violette said this was because her Aunt Jemma grew up in England, but the family moved to the US when her uncle Leonard and her mother were still young. Her, Dr. Amelia Simmons, had moved to France in her late teens to study, quickly picking up the local accent.

“Looks like Lexi’s here,” Jessie commented, pointing to the newcomers.

“Finally!,” Violette sounded exasperated. We made our way over to where Lexi and her family were being greeted with hugs and kisses.

“This is Dr. Lexi Simmons, and her husband Andrew,” The lack of Dr. in front of Andrew’s name did not escape my attention. He definitely had to be the married-in one.

“And that is Eloise,” Lexi pointed to the 8 year old that had run off towards her cousins.

“Where are your little ones?” Violette asked, looking around.

“Cam is bringing them by later - we figured waiting until nap time was finished would be best.”

“Lexi’s got two more girls: Gracie and Makayla,” Violette explained and we wandered off to meet more doctors.

Being an FBI agent meant I had a pretty good memory, but if anyone asked me to identify who was who after that afternoon, I would be stumped.

Violette’s parents arrived  not long afterwards, Drs. Amelia Simmons and Phillipe Monet, with Violette’s younger brother and his fiancée. More doctors, obviously. Though, despite having doctorates, Violette’s brother, Etienne and his fiancée Yulianna were both astronauts. They had actually met at the International Space Station, they explained to me. Violette left me talking with them, as she went off to talk to her grandmother about some biology thing.

* Angie & Zain
* Vivian & Alexander
* Jemma & Fitz