"Remains of the Day"/Victor's discovery/Emily's wedding present to Umarak

This is how "Remains of the Day", Victor's discovery, and Emily's wedding present to Umarak goes in Umarak and the Corpse Bride.

[The scene changes with Umarak in the Land of the Dead]

Alfred: A new arrival.

Emily: He must've fainted. Are you alright?

Umarak: What happened?

Alfred: By Jove, man. Looks like we've got ourselves a breather.

Mrs. Plum: Does he have a dead brother?

Skeleton Boy: He's still soft.

General Bonesapart: A toast, then! To the newlyweds.

Umarak: Newlyweds?

Emily: In the woods, you said your vows so perfectly.

Umarak: I did? Oh, I did. [hits himself] Wake up, wake up, wake up!

[Paul the head waiter arrives]

Paul: Bonjour! Coming through, coming through. My name is Paul, I am the head waiter. I will be creating your wedding feast.

[A maggot pops out of Emily's eye]

Maggot: Wedding feast. I'm salivated.

Umarak: Whoa!

Emily: Maggots. [giggles]

Umarak: Enough! [gets his bow] I have a bow, and I'm not afraid to use it! I want some questions now!

General Bonesapart: Answers. I think you mean answers.

Umarak: Yes, answers. Thank you. [to Emily] What's going on here? Where am I? Who are you?

Emily: Well, that's kind of a long story.

Bonejangles: What a story it is. A tragic tale of romance, passion, and murder most foul!

General Bonesapart: This is gonna be good.

Bonejangles: Hit it, boys.

[Green light appears as a skeleton plays a piano and Bonejangles sings]

**Bonejangles:**

Hey! Give me a listen you corpses of cheer

At least those of you who still got an ear

I'll tell you a story that'll make a skeleton cry

Of our own jubiliciously lovely Corpse Bride

**Chorus:**

Die, die, we all pass away

But don't wear a frown cause it's really okay

You might try and hide

And you might try and pray

But we all end up the remains of the day

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Yeah, yeah, yeah

**Bonejangles:**

Well, our girl was a beauty known for miles around

Til a mysterious stranger came into town

He was plenty good-looking, but down on his cash

And our poor little baby she fell hard and fast

When her daddy said no, she just couldn't cope

So our lovers came up with a plan to elope

**Chorus:**

Die, die, we all pass away

But don't wear a frown cause it's really okay

You might try and hide

And you might try and pray

But we all end up the remains of the day

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Yeah, yeah, yeah

**Bonejangles:**

Oh, that's right

Okay, oh yeah

Come on, boys, pick it up

Yeah, like it

Okay, Chancy, take it

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah-yeah-yeah!

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah-yeah-yeah!

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah (Yo!)

Oh, that's nice

Yeah!

So they conjured up a plan to meet late at night

They told not a soul, kept the whole thing tight

Now her mother's wedding dress fit like a glove

You don't need much when you're really in love

Except for a few things, or so I'm​ told

Like the family jewels and a satchel of gold

Then next to the graveyard by the old oak tree

On a dark foggy night at a quarter to three

She was ready to go, but where was he?

**Crowd:**

And then?

**Bonejangles:**

She waited

**Crowd:**

And then?

**Bonejangles:**

There in the shadows, was it her man?

**Crowd:**

And then?

**Bonejangles:**

Her little heart beat so loud

**Crowd:**

And then?

**Bonejangles:**

And then, baby, everything went black

Now when she opened her eyes she was dead as dust

Her jewels were missing and her heart was bust

So she made a vow lying under that tree

That she'd wait for her true love to come set her free

Always waiting for someone to ask for her hand

When out of the blue comes this groovy young man

Who vows forever to be by her side (Oh yeah, oh yeah)

And that's the story of our own Corpse Bride (Oh yeah, oh yeah)

**Chorus:**

Die, die, we all pass away

But don't wear a frown cause it's really okay

You might try and hide

And you might try and pray

But we all end up the remains of the day

**Bonejangles:**

Do-bop

E-do-bop

E-didly-bob-e-do-bop

Yeah

[Umarak runs outside. We return to the Land of the Living as Victor starts thinking about Umarak]

Victor Van Dort: Oh, Umarak. He must think I'm some kind of fool. This day couldn't get any worse.

Town crier: Hear ye, hear ye! Umarak seen this night on the bridge in the arms of a mystery woman! The dark-haired temptress and the Hunter slipped away into the night!

Nell Van Dort: Mystery woman? He doesn't know any woman.

Maudeline Everglot: Oh, good heavens, Finis, what should we do?

Finis Everglot: Fetch me musket.

Nell Van Dort: Oh, William, do something!

William Van Dort: The town crier probably just had a slow news day. You know how it is, you need a little something to cry about.

Finis Everglot: Regardless, we are short one guest for the wedding tomorrow! [to Victor] Not to mention the financial implications.

Maudeline Everglot: A most scandalous embarrassment for us all.

Victor Van Dort: Someone has to find him.

Nell Van Dort: Oh, we'll find him, dearie, I promise you. [to Maudeline] Just give us until dawn.

Maudeline Everglot: Very well. Til dawn.

[Back in the Land of the Dead, Emily searches for Umarak]

Emily: Umarak, darling, where are you?

Maggot: If you ask me, your boyfriend is kind of jumpy.

Emily: He's not my boyfriend, he's my husband. Umarak, where have you gone?

Maggot: I'll keep an eye out for him.

Emily: Umarak?

[Umarak slowly walks out as Maggot sees him]

Maggot: There he goes, there he goes! He's-- He's getting away! Quick, quick, after him!

Emily: Umarak.

[He runs ahead as the hands point that way]

Emily: Thank you. Umarak! Where are you?

[Umarak fakes being dead]

Emily: Umarak? Where have you gone?

[Black Widow arrives]

Black Widow: Married, huh? I'm a widow.

Umarak: Uh, goodbye! [swings her and runs away]

Black Widow: Oh, how rude. He went that way!

[Umarak continues running]

Emily: Umarak. Umarak, darling.

[He sees Emily and runs off as he finds a zombie]

Umarak: Please. There's been a mistake. I'm not dead.

[The zombie's head falls off]

[Umarak still runs away as he finds another zombie]

Split Man: Excuse me. Excuse me. [splits apart] Excuse me.

[Umarak steps aside]

Split Man: Thank you.

Emily: Umarak.

[He still runs until he finds a dead end]

Umarak: Dead end.

Emily: Umarak! Hello!

[Umarak climbs up, but he encounters Emily]

Emily: Could have used the stairs, silly. [helps him up] Oh, isn't the view beautiful? It takes my breath away. Well, it would if I had any. [giggles] Isn't it romantic? [sits down and motions him to come over]

[Umarak sits next to her]

Umarak: Listen, I'm very sorry about what happened to you, and I'd like to help, really, but I want to go home.

Emily: This is your home now.

Umarak: But I don't even know your name.

Maggot: Well, that's a great way to start a marriage.

Emily: Shut up! [giggles] It's Emily.

Umarak: Emily.

Emily: Oh, I almost forgot. I have something for you. [hands a box to Umarak] It's a wedding present.

[He opens it and finds a bone]

Umarak: Thank you.

[But the box rumbles and bones tumble down as they assemble to a dog]

Umarak: Huh?

[He grabs its collar and sees its name]

Umarak: Scraps?

[Scraps barks]

Umarak: Scraps!

[Scraps jumps on Umarak]

Umarak: Ooh, what a good boy.

Emily: I knew you'd be happy to see him.

Umarak: Who's a good boy? Scraps, sit.

[Scraps sits]

Emily: [giggles]

Umarak: Roll over.

[Scraps rolls over]

Umarak: Play dead.

[Scraps whines]

Umarak: Sorry.

[Scraps jumps on Emily's lap]

Emily: [giggles] Oh, what a cutie.

Umarak: You should have seen him with fur. Victor told me his mother never approved of Scraps jumping up like this. But then again, she never approved of anything.

Emily: Do you think he would've approved of me?

Umarak: You're lucky you'll never have to meet him. [suddenly reconsiders] Well, actually, now that you mention it, I think you should. [puts Scraps down] In fact, since we're, you know, married, you should definitely meet him, and Victoria too. We should go see them right now.

Emily: What a fantastic idea! Where are they buried?

Umarak: Oh. Right.

Emily: What? What is it?

Umarak: They're not from around here.

Emily: Where are they?

[Umarak points upstairs]

Emily: Oh, they're still alive.

Umarak: I'm afraid so.

Emily: Well, that is a problem. [hears Scraps] What's that, Scraps?

[Scraps barks]

Emily: Oh, no. We couldn't possibly.

[Scraps barks]

Emily: Oh, well, if you put it like that.

Umarak: What?

Emily: Elder Gutknecht.

[Umarak feels worried as lightning strikes]