BNHPS The Movie : Giant Robots Attack!

**BNHPS The Movie: Giant Robots Attack!?** is the ##th movie in the canon film adaptations of the *Brooding-Ninja-Highschool-Parkour-Scout* story universe.

## Summary

The 57th, 58th, 59th, and 60th movies in the lengthy *Brooding-Ninja-Highschool-Parkour-Scout* cinema line, The "Giant Robots Attack!" saga is as it sounds. Brooding-Ninja-Highschool-Parkour-Scout and his somewhat helpful friends are pitted against giant robots named "Iron Cogs*."* The Scoutlings must defeat all 420 giant evil robots before they can climb the Biggusdiccus Mountain on the Mountain Dew Research Space Station and defeat Seething-Evil-One-Eye-Doctor.

#### Reception

While largely bombed by hateful critic reviews, fans of the manga came to the saga's defense, noticing that it was largely similar to a major manga arc of the same name that was completely cut out from the anime, and for the fact that Betty was absent in most of the movies. It was awarded the "Worst Mecha Movie Series of 2011". It aired on SyFy for two years before being bought by Disney. Disney then burned all copies of the movie(s) to, quote, "Rid the world of this filth." A hacker by the name of BigFartsInMyPants managed to save copies of the movies, and sold them to the U.S. government as a method of torture.

## Plot

### Part 1: "Jacksovaton Appears! Mass Destruction! Millions In Damages!"

The Scoutlings appear, hapless and unaware of villainous plans to destroy Matsubatsu Town and its inhabitants. After one of their many pissing contests, one of Seething-Evil-One-Eye-Doctor's giant Iron Cogs lands in the middle of the school and begins to destroy everything. For some time (most of the first movie), the Iron Cog dubbed "Jacksovaton" sets the school ablaze, breaks school playground equipment, takes very bad selfies, and eats all of the school's lunch staff. The team finally destroys the mech, only to reveal thousands of very phallic-shaped robots that begin to fiddle with all of the students' diddles. Brooding-Ninja-Highschool-Parkour-Scout and Rear Admiral Fights get pretty fucking pissed off and begin to actually use their powers.

Eventually, after many debates of robot-human marriage, the team defeat Jacksovaton's penis-bots. Deciding to find the source of the attack, Brooding-Ninja-Highschool-Parkour-Scout and everyone else (except Betty, who has been kidnapped by an entirely different villain), leave the school in a blazing mess while they travel into space on Robot Jesus's back to find Seething-Evil-One-Eye-Doctor.

### Part 2: "Super-Space Flight! Spectacular Battle Versus Jon Cenabot!"

The Scoutlings exit the planet's atmosphere, and are quickly bombarded by a giant space robot named Jon Cenabot, piloted by Captain Squanch. Half of the entire movie consists of the Scoutlings and Squanch exchanging witty banter, and shitty catch-lines. This movie banked heavily on 3D, so the entire fight-scene, already badly animated, was marred by the blue/red doubles. The movie abruptly ends as Squanch is caught in the explosion of his mech.

### Part 3: "All The Other Robots Fight! Not Much Happens!"

The other hundreds of Iron Cogs rush at the Scoutlings. This movie is surprisingly well-animated, at expense of the fact that there is little to none voice acting present. The movie ends as the gang lands on a giant space station that appears to be a giant bottle of Mountain Dew, with an actual mountain on the lid. Seething-Evil-One-Eye-Doctor's fortress lies in wait for the Scoutlings.

### Part 4 (Finale): "Final Fight! Battle Versus Iron Cog Lickalotapus!"

The team approaches Seething-Evil-One-Eye-Doctor's lair, only to be stopped by the biggest and most powerful Iron Cog, Lickalotapus. Robot Jesus, tired from flying all damn day, provides the Scoutlings with a repaired version of John Cenabot, equipped with many guns that allow the team to perform powerful MLG quick-scoping powers. Using the power from the Mountain Dew Station, John Cenabot initiates the Ultimate Illuminati Banish Defiler Canon, destroying Lickalotapus and Seething-Evil-One-Eye-Doctor. He lies in the wreckage, uttering his final words; "I just... wanted to play with my toys again... but daddy said robots... are for homos..." The camera pans outward and fades to black.

## Trivia

* Notably, this movie's name is one of the few examples where the production company haphazardly went with the initialization of *Brooding-Ninja-Highschool-Parkour-Scout* as "BNHPS" rather than the series more traditional "BNHSPS." It is also one of the few movies to use an initialization in the title of the movie, rather than spelling out *Brooding-Ninja-Highschool-Parkour-Scout* in full.
	+ In the promotional material, however, it was also initialized as "BNSPS," "BNS," "HSPBNS," and even "BG-PNS." When asked about this and other mistakes, Ultra Satan reportedly explained, "Shut up, you f\*\*\*ing weeaboo."
* Many fans of the manga revered this movie, as the designs for all but 10 mechs were at least somewhat similar to the manga's original plans.
* Robot Jesus was too busy to voice act his role, as he was voice-acting the anime at the time. The cast had to settle for Morgan Freeman, a very unfitting choice.
* Bananarama-sama's commentary can be unlocked by counting the exact number of frames in Part 3.
	+ It is equal parts monologuing about defeating Brooding-Ninja-Highschool-Parkour-Scout by acquiring the MacGuffin Muffins, absent-minded wondering at why *he* wasn't in this movie, and crying in his beer.