Episode 1

## Episode 1: What's The Hook?

{{ #NewWindowLink: https://soundcloud.com/jenkirkman/whats-the-hook/%7CEpisode Link}}

## Summary

There isn't a hook. Jen talks into a microphone. By herself. It's stream of consciousness with a point. It's like this - Jen wants to talk to you so that you know who she is. Then we can go from there. It's an easy and free thing to do for thoughts that are too long to tweet and ideas that aren't quite yet stand-up or other things. It's your friend leaving you a REALLY LONG voicemail message - hopefully an entertaining one.

## Characters

No characters existed yet, but Jen does imitate a drunk girl during her plugs that sounds like the F\*\*\* The Haters Girl.

## Notes

> **0:00 - 3:16** Jen explains why she's always wanted to do a podcast and why she doesn't want to have guests or hear reviews.
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> **3:16 - 9:19** Jen explains what the podcast will be, who she wants as listeners, and why it's called I Seem Fun, then goes on a small rant about twitter. She mentions how she doesn't want to be edited, or maybe she does want to be edited but she can't figure out how to do that. Anne Frank's vagina is mentioned. She explains what the hook of the podcast is and then says her point is that she doesn't know what her hook is.
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> **9:19 - 14:09** Jen talks about how she recently moved and why she rents and why she isn't rich even though people always tell her she is. She says she's really big into assisted living. She lived in her previous home for 7 years, originally moving into it with her ex-husband. She had to move partly because a toddler moved into the apartment above her. She gives her escape plan for if a murderer broke into her apartment.
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> **14:09 - 19:26** Jen talks about her hutch where she keeps her wedding china (and why you don't need the china), and how she doesn't think she ever really needed the plastic hooks that hold the hutch to the wall in case of an earthquake. She imitates her mother asking her about an earthquake.
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> **19:27 - 23:08** Jen talks about her experience hiring movers, (and she had a couple people go "oh, must be nice") and why at a certain age you have to hire people to do that. She talks about what it was like packing along side college kids and stressing over what music to play. She didn't want to play air raid music. The young men didn't react when she put Led Zeppelin on. She mentions Anne Frank again.
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> **23:08- 23:14** Jen takes a sip of hot tea and then asks if it sounded gross.
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> **23:14 - 24:26** Jen talks about how she technically isn't divorced yet even though she's been separated for 2 years, and talks about why you should just be able to throw out a table if your ex ruins it with a magic marker.
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> **24:26- 25:43** Jen wraps up by talking more about what the podcast is.
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> **25:23 - 28:57** Plugs.
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## Quotes

"I'm 38, I have a car, I have some dough, I'm sure I could maybe find a cute guy somewhere - it's not even 9 at night - and I'm sitting in my room talking into a microphone."

"If you aren't a narcissist, you are probably not on twitter"

"What if Anne Frank had had a podcast instead of a diary, it would have been so difficult for her to do because she would have had to be whispering."

"I don't want to teach. I don't know if guys who date younger women enjoy the teaching aspect of it, but I don't want to teach anybody. You know, I don't wanna be like 'oh you don't know Zeppelin?..."