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204,424 | How do you piss off /r/jokes? Jokes: son-of-a-b***h
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86,402 | How do you know a woman is wearing tights? - Her knees swell up when she farts.
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15,466 | Don't judge men by their wealth or appearance, judge them by their characters. All 140 of them.
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57,130 | There's no reason to be tailgating me when I'm doing 50 in a 35. And those flashing lights on top of your car looks ridiculous!
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140,892 | I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
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37,284 | it really hurt my feelings when you called me a stalker to your friend when you guys thought you were alone in the locker room
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105,068 | What do you call a drummer in a three piece suit? The Da-da-defendant.
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138,414 | What does a clever sentry on guard duty say when he wakes up to see his commanding officer standing over him? Amen
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199,616 | Sports fad invented by pigs: Mud wrestling.
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225,221 | A sex joke I wrote I don't tell her where to go. but why does she always come?
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53,220 | Apparently there was a new episode of ""Biggest Loser"" on tonight... Indianapolis Colts edition.
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91,180 | What is it about being blind... ...that makes people want to walk their dog so much?
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44,765 | Bill murray banged my mom and everyone chalked it up as yet another fun silly thing bill murray did but he destroyed my family
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71,726 | If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.
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103,947 | Why do girls make a ""shhhhh"" noise while peeing and men don't? 'Cos men have a 6 inch silencer.
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152,050 | If insanity is doing the same thing over & over and expecting different results, I must be sane cause I don't even like doing things once.
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45,559 | Why did the hipster burn his tongue on his pizza? He ate it before it was cool.
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75,828 | Nostradamus's childhood Kid Nostradamus asks his mom: ""Mom, what's for dinner?"" ""Like you don't know, you little prick!""
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199,179 | I said the punchline before the joke. Wanna know why I got downvoted yesterday?
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161,339 | My new neighbor is fat, obnoxious, and loud. Now I know how Canada feels.
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219 | I want to make a series about the murder of an airline crew but I still have to shoot the pilot.
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67,169 | you become your ""real you"" when you are hunched over eating a burrito on the toilet and you look up and see yourself in the mirror
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48,403 | Bad Cop: The proof is in the pudding. Good Cop: Stop putting all our evidence in pudding. Why do you keep putting our evidence in pudding?
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43,045 | What is the speed limit of Sex? 68, because at 69, you eat it.
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1,409 | My friend peed on the floor so he can come into my room. I looked over at him and told him ""You're in""
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55,281 | These Mexican cannibals accidentally... These Mexican cannibals accidentally kill a priest for their meal. One of the guys asks the cook ""ay, what's for dinner?"" The cook says ""tacos al pastor""
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144,524 | Judging from the sounds in my trunk this guy would have had an excellent career as a drummer.
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106,282 | This Christian rock band is so bad... ...I want to die right now so I can complain in person.
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100,495 | What's the difference between a priest and his dog? One wears pants and a collar while the other wears a collar and pants.
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167,288 | Me: *gets in pool* Come on in. 4-year-old: No, there might be sharks. Me: 4: Me: 4: Me: *gets out of pool*
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205,274 | I used to date a midget... I was nuts over her
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131,114 | What do Mexican's put under their carpet? Underlay
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167,701 | As a child I had a medical condition that meant I had to eat soil three times a day It's lucky my older brother told me about it really... \- Milton Jones
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35,262 | [interview] ""What's your strongest trait?"" My fingers. ""No, like... Are you pinching me??"" GIVE ME [fighting to maintain pinch] THE JOB
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61,607 | What do you call a chicken looking at a bowl of lettuce? Chicken sees a salad
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111,171 | All I want from a woman is for her to hold my hand, look into my eyes, and tell me it's ok to get out of her bushes.
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105,023 | Did Donald Trump make the right choice when picking his running mate? It de-Pence on who you ask.
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40,159 | What makes Skrillex skillful at the chemistry lab? He rocks at *dropping the base.*
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88,228 | When I found out the murderer dismembered the victim, It really tore me into pieces.
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226,721 | What did Oliver Twist say at the slave auction? Please sir, I want some moors.
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74,117 | What do Mexican jokes have in common with black jokes? Once you know Juan, you know Jamal
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