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[on phone] Hey, Halpert, what���s the big idea? First you jump ship. Now you���re stealing Darryl too. When will it end?
Dwight
false
15,460
3
20
24
Oh my God.
Jim
false
13,030
3
11
45
Is that not what happens when you're high?
Jim
false
25,801
5
9
20
Are we, uh... are we leaving or what? [Mose hits Andy in the head with a deflated ball] Ow!
Andy
false
1,992
1
6
47
Cool, so maybe hook me up with some Fleebulls and some Hive.
Michael
true
33,570
6
8
42
Holy crap.
Phyllis
false
55,215
9
9
22
I am nigh!
Dwight
false
10,129
3
3
37
Are you playing for the other team?!
Andy
false
15,384
3
20
11
[English accent] William Dolittle at your service. A.K.A., Will Do.
Andy
false
17,340
4
1
51
Check that out. [points to Toby] Look at me, I'm Toby, I'm stretching, I know what I'm doing. Why is he even here?
Michael
false
36,488
6
18
25
I'll go, Michael. You'll just screw it up.
Dwight
false
47,485
8
6
47
I wasn't here that day.
Jim
false
58,799
9
21
43
All right, fine, just know that you made me do this. [starts touching Toby���s thighs]
Andy
false
21,891
4
13
35
No.
Phil
false
5,850
2
11
36
I'm in the brig. See? The boat's not as corporate-friendly as advertised. What was the deal with the guy jumping overboard? What was... if he had just waited and heard what I had to say, he would be motivated right now and not all wet.
Michael
false
11,777
3
8
48
I understand. We're all friends.
Michael
false
57,276
9
16
34
Oh hush. Loose braids reflect a loose character. Now stay still.
Angela
false
51,549
8
20
16
Toots, we're not stopping this train, so get off the tracks.
Phyllis
false
59,387
9
22
70
Here we go. [documentary starts with the first scene of ���Pilot���]
Jim
false
59,415
9
23
3
Yeah. Yeah, I don���t think���
Toby
false
42,490
7
13
43
[quietly] No, no, no.
Michael
false
33,770
6
9
38
I already declared you, it was too dark to tell.
Michael
false
2,220
2
1
50
I don't know, what?
Jim
false
49,638
8
13
31
I will not, it's not-
Angela
false
48,080
8
8
39
Oh-ho, I am in.
Jim
false
16,499
3
23
11
Moon each other.
Michael
false
36,910
6
19
50
Oh, please. I wish he'd come after me. I would be like-aaah!
Dwight
false
2,353
2
1
77
Yes, it is true.
Michael
true
55,757
9
11
19
His last girlfriend was a transvestite. I knew it right away. Adam���s apple like the prow of a ship, thumbs like a lowland gorilla. Ha, but this one couldn���t see it, or didn���t wanna see it.
Dwight
false
26,591
5
12
18
Ladies, are we prepared to let the Kevins of the world decide anything for us? Anything at all? We don't even give him full internet access.
Pam
false
58,608
9
21
24
Okay.
Sensei
false
47,597
8
7
7
No we���re not.
Phyllis
false
14,657
3
18
9
It was insane!
Oscar
false
22,082
4
14
17
Would that be such a bad thing?
Dwight
false
11,506
3
8
8
...before noon...
Dwight
false
32,207
6
4
72
Whoa, whoa. Wait a minute. What is the etiquette on taking the gifts? Can you only take your own back or is it a whatever you can carry type of thing?
Meredith
false
20,985
4
10
35
There was a woman in your life who affected you very deeply, and she left before you could say good bye. I think you need to say good bye.
Dwight
false
32,255
6
5
1
All right...
Michael
false
30,709
5
26
33
Hey, people need volleyball now more than ever.
Dwight
false
7,566
2
16
47
Not really, my fiance is out of town.
Kevin
true
15,946
3
21
28
I'm unhappy when I'm with her.
Michael
false
48,070
8
8
37
Your arm feels good on my back.
Kevin
false
38,543
7
1
26
Yep. That's exactly what my first thought was. And then I remembered having a conversation with him where he was like, 'I don't own an Ebay store,' so...
Jim
false
37,159
6
20
30
Humbly taking your hand upon which I kiss to show my contrition.
Dwight
false
39,822
7
5
32
Oh, my gosh! We're almost out of time. How much for another half hour?
Andy
false
51,348
8
19
39
But here's the thing about Tinkerbell, Jim. Everyone has to believe in her or she doesn't exist.
Nellie
false
1,539
1
5
45
Forget it. It's just a dry erase board.
Jim
true
37,490
6
21
42
Yeah.
Erin
false
14,752
3
18
23
Yeah, he look like Hillary Clinton.
Darryl
false
57,888
9
18
29
Well, I don't like giving him bad news.
Oscar
false
47,365
8
6
30
I bet he went home.
Pam
false
27,556
5
15
30
Mm, great cake.
Dwight
false
37,373
6
21
29
We?'
Dwight
false
21,919
4
13
42
Great. And uh, obviously looking for someone who knows Photoshop, and Dreamweaver. Uh, Corel Painter, Illustrator, AfterEffects, all the basics.
Graphics guy
false
5,511
2
10
45
The deal is that this is my last hurrah, cause I made a New Year's resolution that I'm not going to drink anymore. During the week.
Meredith
false
15,570
3
20
42
Cut. That was your best apology video ever.
Pam
false
8,652
2
20
33
My father's name was Dwight Schrute. My grandfather's name was Dwight Schrute. His father's name Dwide Schrude. Amish. I loved my father very much. Every morning he'd wake up at dawn and make us biscuits with gravy. When I was little my dad and I played a lot of games together. My dad cheated a lot but I never busted him on it. I would have, except I didn't know about it. He didn't tell me till years later. I was shocked when I found out.
Dwight
false
6,143
2
12
17
Wow...
Pam
false
2,910
2
3
33
[empties bowl of M&M's into his mouth]
Kevin
false
22,166
4
14
27
All right, well it already went through, so...
Jim
false
28,022
5
17
16
[same time as Dwight] No, I don't think I ever did. That was your idea Dwight.
Michael
false
32,594
6
6
1
How was Puerto Rico? Was it so romantic?
Kelly
false
18,022
4
2
59
We're gonna take what's rightfully ours! We're gonna take a stand, Dwight! We're gonna take a stand!
Michael
false
43,392
7
17
14
[walking through the office, notices Andy with Erin's computer set up at his desk] What the heck! Why do you have Erin's computer!
Pam
false
11,536
3
8
14
Really? That's so cool. I've always wanted to learn...
Karen
false
41,295
7
10
30
Actually, we're in a mild recession right now. I'll give you that, but people use China as the boogie man for all their problems. In the nineteen eighties, it was Japan.
Oscar
false
35,498
6
16
16
Alright.
Jim
false
3,175
2
4
13
I'm okay!
Kelly
false
32,240
6
5
1
Well the 'fun' is in it. [conference room group chimes agreement.]
Toby
false
14,499
3
17
41
I so got you.
Karen
false
39,799
7
5
31
Stay the same.
All
false
28,186
5
18
1
And of course, classy.
Jim
false
35,887
6
16
59
Thank you.
Jim
false
54,352
9
6
35
Really?
Andy
false
50,284
8
16
9
Theater.
Jim
false
58,037
9
19
14
Well, we won���t be late. I love you, mom. Thanks.
Pam
false
36,969
6
20
5
Hey, thanks.
Pam
false
37,736
6
22
27
No. Except for the pendant that you bought me. Which I love.
Pam
false
43,474
7
17
17
[looks at her knowingly] Pretty sneaky sis. [knocking on conference room door]
Andy
false
27,458
5
15
19
No, no, I'm okay. I'm all right. [sighs heavily] Okay... okay.
Michael
false
57,666
9
17
34
Nope. I did not see you either.
Kevin
false
47,903
8
8
14
The fire pit is a no-brainer.
Kevin
false
1,096
1
4
41
She's so old, she went into an antique store and they kept her.'
Michael
false
19,874
4
6
47
Nnnno. Uh, turns out, it was just a really bad idea involving fire. But I think I fixed it.
Jim
false
24,934
5
7
4
T minus...
Kevin
false
16,554
3
23
18
No. And the sheets are made of fire.
Dwight
false
4,070
2
6
24
No.
Dwight
false
27,450
5
15
19
It's all connected. Shut up. [to A.J.] Does she ever mention 'Michael Scott?'
Michael
false
5,183
2
9
40
Oh. You were forbidden.
Michael
true
43,845
7
18
39
That marriage would be a sham.
Michael
false
7,562
2
16
44
Michael's got a few tricks for Valentine's Day. He found a place where you can get 12 plastic roses for $10 and he's got a great line. 'Me so thorny.'
Pam
false
31,364
6
2
32
What's happening to you Michael?
Phyllis
false
30,661
5
26
27
Really, really funny.
Toby
false
22,250
4
14
36
[knocks files off desk] Sorry.
Phyllis
false
22,121
4
14
23
He's here on a special work program. He's slow, you know, in his brain.
Dwight
false
36,838
6
19
41
Well, it just so happens that I am a manager too. And the way I manage people is that I touch their hearts and souls with humor, with love and maybe a dash of razzle-dazzle. And I don't see that from you.
Michael
false
22,349
4
14
52
N-nothing you need to know the details of.
Dwight
false
15,870
3
21
16
Malls are just awful and humiliating. They're just store after store of these horrible salespeople making a big fuss out of an adult shopping in a junior's section. There are petite adults who are sort of... smaller who need to wear... maybe a kids' size 10.
Angela
false
54,317
9
6
31
Oscar, we're in the middle of talking.
Kevin
false
33,788
6
9
42
Michael, can I... OK, I'm just going to skip right past the what and go with why.
Jim
false