prompt
stringlengths 258
20k
| answer
stringlengths 98
4.59k
|
|---|---|
***IELTS Writing Task 2:
Some people think students should study the science of food and how to prepare it. Others think students should spend time on other important subjects.***
## DISCUSS BOTH VIEWS AND GIVE YOUR OPINION.
With regard to the enhancement of education, there is a great deal of submissions being made to the study program for students and the subjects included therein. While some argue that the science and preparation of food should be added into courses, others insist on giving priority to more important subjects. This essay will analyse both views and argue in favour of the latter.
To begin with, the experiences which the science of food brings are valuable. Firstly, scientific knowledge about food encourages students to take a health-conscious approach to their dietary patterns. Because when students understand how food constituents like proteins, fats, carbohydrates, affect their physical condition, they may become more willing to adopt a balanced diet in preference to fast food. Moreover, possessing a solid understanding of food and cooking can ensure not only general well-being but also serve as a basic survival skill. Students who are proficient with culinary skills will be more capable of adjusting to living on their own. For instance, they can make their own food without either readily available dishes at homes or processed foods at convenience stores.
On the other hand, the students are dedicated to the formal majors selected by governments and institutions that carry advantages. The primary goal of school education should be to prepare students for one pivotal end that is the university entrance exam. This means placing more emphasis on compulsory subjects like Math, Literature and English, which are practical subjects for evaluating students' performance. Furthermore, the academic subjects can provide an individual with the foundational knowledge to smoothly transit into a professional working environment. For example, logical thinking acquired during math lessons and critical thinking fostered by literature are prerequisites to nuanced problem-solving skills.
Overall, despite the several benefits offered by the incorporation of food science into students' curriculum, I am in favour of the opinion that students should devote their time mainly to core subjects. | argue in favour of the latter.
A properly structured restatement + opinion paragraph does not need to repeat the discussion instruction. Rather, it will provide a direct response in accordance with the 3rd requirement of the presentation, your personal opinion. You already indicated that both views will be discussed when you restated both sides of the discussion. So all that is left to comply with the task accuracy section is the statement of your opinion. You lose points when you do not directly address the prompt discussion requirements.
am in favour
Since you used the 3 paragraph format for this discussion, as you did not agree or disagree immediately with the public opinion, this statement must have been presented as the 3rd paragraph of the discussion. It must contain the same fully developed explanation as you presented with the public opinion to properly explain how you developed your supported side. It is not given a score when made a part of the concluding summary. The concluding summary is a recap of the 3 discussion paragraphs. It does not recieve a score when it contains a new topic that requires further discussion development such as, your personal opinion. |
## **write an essay against banning smartphones in public.**
Using smartphones today is a common phenomenon with everyone all around the world. Everything always has advantages and disadvantages, and there are some people have an idea that is banning smartphones in public because of its bad influence such as using phone to listen to music while driving a vehicle can make a bad accident or using cell phone to call someone in library is too annoying, and so on. Those reasons are not totally wrong but I still believe in advantages of smartphones in public. Therefore, I personally think there is no need to ban smartphones in public.
Firstly, using smartphones in public still have a big advantage that may relates to live or dead. For example, if someone is in dangerous and in the verge of death that means that person is in emergency and need help, he/she can use a phone to ask for helping from his/her family or someone he/she trust. If banning using phones in public, that person in the example is hard to survive. Therefore, smartphones can be saviours of people in some situations.
Secondly, sharing something interesting by smartphones can connect people with people to be more friendly, not only talking together simply. It is imaginable that some friends are meeting and gathering in a coffee house for celebrating some successful events. Those friends did events successfully and definitely took some funny and happy photographs while preparing for events. And now, they can talk about that time and open pictures taken before to recollect some exciting activities they did. That can make the meeting more impressive and happier. Smartphones can help people more united in public place.
In conclusion, because using smartphones in public still have such a lot of advantages, I think we should not ban them. The point here is the person who use it with which consciousness he/she has. Smartphones do not have faults. | common phenomenon
You cannot refer to the regular usage of an item as a common phenomenon because those are 2 contrasting word meanings:
Common - widespread, general, or universal
Phenomenon - an occurence of an extraordinary observable nature
So, if the usage of mobile phones are considered common, it cannot be considered a phenomena. Kindly check the word meaning against the way you want to use it next time. Make sure the words you use in combination refer to the same or improved meaning of the idea you wish to convey.
listen to music while driving a vehicle
This is a private act, not a public act. If one is driving a vehicle as in a private car, then the reference is incorrect. If one is driving a taxi, bus, or specified form of public transport then it is a public action. There is again, a problem with the way the writer references the words. He shows a lack of word meaning and inability to properly use the word references.
Let us put is this way, the writer has the right ideas, but is unable to properly form word and sentence structures to convey what he wishes to say. Language development exercises with regards to grammar structure are in order. The essay has the correct meaning but fails to deliver properly when it comes to GRA requirements. |
**Prompt:**
***Nowadays, families are not as close as the used to be.***
## **What is the causes? What can be solutions for this?**
My writing: 297 words
Recently, there has been a bigger gap between family members. Regardless of many efforts have been made, this is still happening in many households.There are some reasons leading to this problem, and fortunately there are also appropriate measures to fix the situation.
To start with, difference between generations is the primary cause of the gap deviding families. For example, parents easily get confused, and struggle to understand their children's thoughts. Spontaneously, children also feel like their parents are incomprehensible, and keep breaking their privacy and freedom. This is how generation gap looks like, and leaving it unsolved can result in various kinds of nagative knock-on effects. Secondly, the lack of communitcation is one of the most serious culprits which is need to be fixed. It is obvious that every organization existing without sharing and communicating will be collapsed including families. Therefore, the shotage of talking and listening between members in a house can help the gap grow bigger and bigger from day to day.
From my perspective, the solutions should come from both sides, or all family members together. On one hand, parents should be friends with their children in order to listen what are their problems and struggles. This is an ideal method to narrow the generation gap, and aslo to get to understand their children more deeply. On the other hand, children should try to put themselves in their parents' shoes so as to recognize difficulties and hardship parents are facing. As a result, from understanding each other, members can become more close-knit as a true family.
In conclusion, the gap in families can come from many distinctive causes, but some proper approaches can be very beneficial. And the main point here is just to share, and to communicate more from both parents and children. | ~~Regardless of many efforts have been made, this is still happening in many households.~~
As this is not referenced in the original presentation, it should not be discussed in the restatement. This is a topic alteration that lowers the accuracy of restatement score.
There are some reasons ... measures to fix the situation.
You are not answering the questions. The discussion outline based on qquestion responses are missing. This paragraph does not have any questions response outline as needed to prove your logical understanding of the discussion requirements. An accurate response is needed for a proper score to be applied.
communitcation
Spelling error. Proofread and correct these to avoid vocabulary and grammar deductions.
And the main
Academic writing violation. Grammar rules dictate that " and" as a conjunction should never be used to start a sentence. This is because conjunctions are used as thought and idea connectors in a sentence. |
Prompt :
***In some countries, parents are choosing to teach children themselves at home instead of sending them to school.***
## Do the advantages of homeschooling outweigh the disadvantages?
The trend of choosing home schooling over general education for children are getting more noticement among parents in several countries. While many wouldn't opt to such counter-intuitive and in some sense unfeasible choice, it's my believe that homeschooling
Admittedly, it is true that self-education without the help of school can be challenging as well as detrimental for a student mental health. A self-education student wouldn't be able to acquire information as good as those who interpret them with a trained teacher, even with a help of their parents. Lacking exposure to friends of their age may cause some trouble with their social skill and even make them vulnerable to inappropriate influences. For example in the from of addictive substance such as drugs, alcohol or cigarreet or in a more mental terms such as mental disorders.
However, the previously mentioned negatives can be considered negligible when consider homeschooling's beneficial side. An apparent advantage over traditional learning that it has is the reduction of transportation. Transporting between places for children can be both time and economically costly. It can also lurk the danger in the occurrence of day to day traffic. Study at home can eliminate all of that threats. Besides, a child by being exposed to a self learning environment can be extremely beneficial in the long run. This can be a tremendous help as they can develop a skill to learn independently from former structure. Scientifically speaking, self-learning is one of the major skill that evolve humankind from the cave man period to be a well established civilization as we are today. By the same token, a person learning by themselves is a intuitive process that get better gradually.
In conclusion, I support the view that homeschooling' advantages surpass its cons. Additionally, that homeschooling is an extremely beneficial method should only be true when provided that the student is able to learn effectively and is prevented from harmful effect to their mental health. | it's my believe that homeschooling
Complete the sentence to offer an accurate response to the question provided. The thesis statement is incomplete. Do not spend too much time and word count on the restatement and opinion presentation. Go directly to your opinion and make sure the accurate response is given.
the previously mentioned negatives
Do not over discuss. Use a comparative analysis per reason instead of per paragraph.That way the discussion stays within the written debate requirements. Debunk each negative as a positive to allow for better response format compliance.
I support the view that homeschooling' advantages surpass its cons.
This is should have been fully stated at the start as well. The restated topic is presented twice per discussion. At the start and at the end asa reminder to the reader. |
## the most favored type of transportation
The bar chart illustrates the percentage of transport preference in young generation in the US, UK, France and Italy in a single year.
Overall, the most favored type of transportation in most countries is car, except France. Also of note is that the proportion of young Italy people who preferred car in this year is highest, and Italy also record widest gap among the figures for motorcycle and two other vehicles.
Regarding Italy, while the proportion of car preference was nearly 75% in the year, the figures for motorcycle were significantly lower, at about 8% and 10%, respectively .
Turning to to US and UK, these countries had the same percentage of people who were in favored of car (60%). The lowest figure for this kind of vehicle was found in France, at only 40%. However, out of the four countries , the percentage of young people preferring biking was noticeably higher in this countries , reflecting that young generation here are more likely to become environmentally - conscious .
* | Where a single image is presented for review, this automatically uses a 3 paragraph format. This is due to the brief number of reporting possibilities from the image. A 4 paragraph presentation is used when 2 or more images are present. Each paragraph needs to have 3 sentences at least. The report format is off for this report. A single sentence is definitely not representative of a paragraph. It is the overstretchinof information to incorrectly create 4 paragraphs that resulted in an improperly focused report presentation. Only the last paragraph in this presentation meets the necessary paragraph requirements. Focus on proper formatting next time rather than discussion stretching for the wrong reasons. |
***Task 2
Many people have realized the importance of environmental protection. That being said, they hardly ever take action themselves.***
## What are the reasons?What should be done to encourage individuals to take action on this issue?
A majority of people have been self-aware that the preservation of the environment is extremely essential. However, radical actions have yet been implied due to the misconception of everyone that the environmental conservation responsibility belongs to the local authority. Therefore, we should conduct propagandizing plans to change the point of the view of these residents that protecting the environment is the duty of everyone.
From the past until now, no matter what nation, the responsibility of the governments is to ensure the safety of the citizens as well as their living habitat. Thus, the citizens think that even if they have a strong awareness of environmental protection, only the authorities have the right to imply it. Even more, if they take action on their own without any permission from the government, they may be sentenced to intervening in the work of the government. Therefore, to avoid such unwanted accidents like above, the residents would prefer to do nothing rather than contributing to the environmental conversation.
Based on the recent misconception of the citizens, numerous propagandizing schemes should be applied to modify again their perspective that protecting the environment is the obligation of all. To be more specific, one of the factors that need to be prioritized in this change is the young generation as they are the ones who decide the later future of the country. Education departments should promote schools to teach the student that the environment-protecting duty belongs to everyone. Moreover, these adolescents should be reminded that any radical action to preserve the environment would always be fully supported with all the resources by the local authority. Then we will change the target to the adults. By propagandizing the importance of environmental protection through multi-platform such as the internet, TV, and newspaper, everyone will soon take the first step in this revolution.
In conclusion, it is understandable that people have yet done anything to preserve the environment as they don't understand their role in this protecting work. However, I firmly believe that with effective propagandizing plans, everyone will take action as soon as possible after they truly understand their role. | The prompt restatement + question response paragraph is excellently done in this presentation. It is highly creative and shows a strong control over sentence development, clear thought development, even as the vocabulary is a bit exaggerated and used out of meaning. The examiner will score the effort in word usage though. It would be better to use simpler word references next time though. just to avoid exaggerations that tend to alter the presentation focus.
~~like above~~
There is no need to reference a sentence position wwhen it is still located in the same paragraph. This is an unnecessary discussion reference.
propagandizing schemes
Try the term "agressive government programs" next time. It will be easier understood by the reader. |
## number of households using electrical tools for housework
The line graphs illustrate the proportion of households using electrical tools for housework and using hours in every family weekly between 1920 and 2019.
It is obvious that the percentage of housewives choosing to use the refrigerator and vacuum cleaner was an upward trend during the research period. In contrast, It was the unstoppable fall in the number of working hours which housewives spent on household chores per week.
As can be seen from the first chart, In 1920 there was no household used refrigerator in their home. However, this number rose rapidly to 100% of households after 80 years and remain stable from 2000. Likewise, the growth of the proportion of vacuum cleaner users was similar to the refrigerator one, but it reaches its top at 100% of housewives in the year 2000 and remains unchanged. Moreover, the percentage of housekeepers chosen to use washing machines was made up the highest at 40% in 1920, which then fluctuated slightly and got over 70% of users in 2019.
At the same time, the amount of time which housewives spent on household chores per week decrease dramatically by 40 hours all over the period. | The line graphs
How many line graphs are involved? Does each graph represent a different data set? How are these identified? The summary overview lacks clarity and proper information separation. Consider using a more detailed and individualized summary next time.
, It was the unstoppable fall in the number of working hours which housewives spent on household chores per week.
That resulted in what? The sentence structure is jumbled, resulting in a confusing reference. When presenting a trend, do not overcomplicate things. One trending reference is enough. The other trend can be part of a report paragraph instead. It will help you avoid creating confusing sentence structures such as this one.
For the number of charts, you mentioned a "first" chart . So there are several other images? What happened to the other numerical ordinals? The paragraph further adds to the confusion of the paragraph content. |
Ex:
## Wild animals have no place in the 21st century, so protecting them is a waste of resources.
***To what extent do you agree or disagree?***
Recently, there is a notion that there is not enough place for wild animals to survive in this era. Therefore, efforts to conserve animals can be a meaningless and squander of resources; nevertheless, I firmly believe that the existence of wild life plays an indispensable role in human life. This essay will point out reasons for my statement.
To begin with, animals provide mankind with a great amount of scientific resources. Many elements contained in body of wild species are really valuable in the process of researching science, especially in biology and chemistry. To illustrate, genetic code of monkey and gorilla, which has lots of similarities to human's one, is used ubiquitously in process of developing medicine as well as curing methods for man. Besides, white mouse has been considered as one of the most ideal samples for most of medical experiments since the laboratory was established.
Furthermore, the survival of wild animals have always related directly to the existence of all species. If there are too many animals die out, the diversity of eco-system will be destroy, consequently, the loss of biodiversity will not only put human but also all kinds of living creatures at risks of extinction. For instance, pollination of many plants cannot be happened without participation of insects such as butterflies or bees, this will lead to the disappearance of worldwide flora. Moreover, without animals, people will have no milk to drink, no pets to raise and no meat to eat.
In conclusion, due to the need of wild animals in biodiversity and scientific research. It is obvious that appearances of these species in this era put a blessing than a burden to mankind, therefore, people need to protect them even if it consume lots resources. | resources; nevertheless, I firmly believe
Since you are now expressing your response opinion, this thought needs to stand out. Make this a stand-out statement by presenting it as a seperate thought. Use a new sentence instead of a combined thought presentation.
~~This essay will point out reasons for my statement.~~
Since you already provided the reason for your , in the response sentence, you need not say that you will explain your reasons. It is the thes is statement that is scored for accuracy, not the repeated instruction sentence.
has **lots** of similarities
The word "lots" is more of an English informal word. For academic writing use more professional equivalent words such as several, numerous, and marked. These words carry the same meaning as "lots" but within a more refined writing context.
the diversity of eco-system will be **destroy, consequently,**
2 errors in this presentation:
- Destroy should be presented in an active present voice (destroyed) since the action is still currently active.
- Grammar problem. Just as I mentioned earlier, 2 sentences need to be used. One for each idea. A comma should not be used in place of a period. More sentence structure exercises should help you clarify when a comma or period should be used in a sentence.
cannot be happened
- Do not mix past and present sentence structures. When something is ongoing, use current action references. Better tense usage skills need to be developed.
Sentence structure enors are repeated throughout the essay. The GRA score will be disappointing. |
***TOPIC: The internet has transformed the way information is shared and consumed, but it has also created problems that did not exist before.***
## What are the most serious problems associated with the internet and what solutions can you suggest?
In this day and age, the Internet has changed the way of distributing and consuming information. However, the expansion of the internet may lead to various unwanted issues. There are numerous problems behind this phenomenon, and several solutions should be adopted to address those problems.
There are many issues that arise with the widespread use of the Internet. To commence with, the main problem for Internet users is the significant increase in cybercrime. In recent years, thousands of people face with information theft which can result in the loss of possession and personal information. Another serious problem is that minors may access to varieties of dangerous websites on the Internet. By way of illustration, many children all over the world suffered from life-threatening injuries on accounts of imitating bad videos on Youtube.
In order to address the aforementioned issues, several actions can be taken to protect Internet users. The first measure would be to install current antivirus system for computers. Keeping that software updated will prevent digital devices from being attacked which may lead to the loss of vulnerable information. Another efficacious way is that parents should keep an eye on their children when they surf the Internet. For example, they should inform their minors with integral knowledge so as to raise their awareness on obtaining information from the Internet. In addition, restricting the access of children by requiring more confirmation is also a feasible way for parents to deal with potential cyber dangers.
In conclusion, cyber problems can be ascribed to two reasons which are the rise of cybercrime and the access to ineligible websites of children, and this issue can be dealt with by a joint effort of both improving online security and raising awareness of minors. | There are numerous problems behind this phenomenon, and several solutions should be adopted to address those problems.
While repeating the discussion points shows your ability to restate the instructions / questions, it does not reflect your ability to use short form, topic references in direct response to the questions The direct answers are scored in a major way in relation to task accuracy.
the main problem for Internet users is the significant increase in cybercrime.
In order to address the aforementioned issues, several actions can be taken to protect Internet users.
These sentences are nothing more than non - scoring word fillers. By starting with a topic sentence, the C + C score is boosted as the discussion point is made clear at the start of the paragraph.
and this issue
As you are presenting a seperate topic, use a new sentence presentation instead. That will help you meet the minimum 2 sentence summary requirement and create a clearer summary presentation. |
## colour does have an impactful effect on humans
When constructing and decorating buildings, architects usually design business premises or hospitals in consonance with some psychological theory related to colour. It is a common belief that colour can remarkably influence people's emotions and behaviours. However, there is no valid scientific evidence on how colours change workers' attitudes in workplaces. In my opinion, the quality of the work environment and excellent healthcare can make a significant change rather than colours themselves.
Generally, painting bright colours such as yellow or blue with fewer patterns help increase employees' creativity and cause fewer distractions. In reality, colour is not a fundamental factor that makes them dedicate their talents and skills to the business. Working with a caring, subtle boss and cooperative colleagues provide workers with more positive energy and motivation to keep working effectively. Besides, business partners often visit a particular company mainly for work contractions, so they do not need to look around and decide what colour makes them feel pleased. Moreover, other elements such as sounds, light, modern technological facilities also play a vital role in growing productivity. For instance, a worldwide renowned e-commerce website, Amazon, erect an Amazon sphere containing various plants that give staff a sense of nature and calm to come up with novel ideas.
In hospitals, patients go for examing their health, so they will not bother what colour the hospital wall is. Additionally, patients recover rapidly from operations because of high-quality healthcare equipment, exact treatment and encouragement from their families. Briefly saying, a good outcome after a process of treatments makes patients feel happy and optimistic to continue their lives. Similarly, medical staff do not give much attention to colours because they have numerous patients on the waiting list, so they have to work all day long, even late nights. Therefore, if they have just a little time to break, taking a nap in their own offices or going home is their usual option.
In conclusion, although colour does have an impactful effect on human's emotions or behaviours, its outcome does not make any remarkable change in places like offices or hospitals. Therefore, in order to boost productivity in office buildings, business owners should offer more rewards to employees. Regular care and family are two major factors that a patient really need. | Please be conscious of the writing time allotment when writing the essay. It is necessary fen you to use a timer at the start of your excercises to figure out exactly how many words you can with, review, and edit within 40 minutes. You should find that when real time sets in, you cannot write almost 400 words. The safety target for the word count is exactly 300 words.
It is a common belief ... there is no valid scientific evidence ...in workplaces.
When writing the response statement to the true or false question, refer to the given keyword for task compliance scoring. These quotes are the r sentences where you could have inserted the keyword response. Yes, your response implies the keyword. Using the actual keyword is a score boost though as it clearly responds to the question.
the quality of the work environment and excellent healthcare
There is no response given in compliance with the second discussion question which is: "How far do colours influence people's health and capacity for work?" Your given answer is not relevant to the question. It does not meet the prompt requirement in terms of direct question responses.
The provided discussion does not address the provided points regarding the effects of color. The writer took a different approach that resulted in a prompt alteration, leading to a failing task score. |
**Ielts writing task 2:
*Although more and more people read news on the internet, newspapers will remain the most important source of news.*
## Do you agree or disagree?**
There is the fact that, nowadays, many people choose to use the internet for reading news. While nobody can deny the important role of newspapers in providing information to the reader. Personally I agree with this view.
On the one hand, the development of the internet brings more convenience to people in updating news daily. Indeed, with just a wifi connected mobifone or laptop, people now can read news everywhere they want without having to bring newspapers. Moreover, for people who want to read news from more than one publisher, it may cost quite a amount of money if they read news from newspapers or magazines. Instead, using the internet, people can read as much as they want with no worry about how much it costs.
On the other hand, newspapers are still considered as a traditional way to get news. Firstly, before the increase of digital news, newspapers were the most ever-popular way for people to receive news through many decades. It gradually became a culture, especially for the old generation. For example, my mom still keeps her habit of buying newspapers weekly to read even though she can read it online. Secondly, there was a lot of research that showed the harmful effects of spending too much time watching on the laptop or on the small screen like mobifone. The popular issue that we can count on is short-sighted eyes and sore eyes. Therefore, reading in papers is encouraged for all readers to protect their eyes.
In conclusion, I would agree that despite the fact that reading news on the internet is being popular, there are a lot of people who prefer newspapers to get them daily news. | While nobody can deny the important role of newspapers in providing information to the reader.
There are 2 possible reasons for this problematic sentence.
- The writer used a wrong sentence structure. Rather than using a continous sentence of 2 ideas seperated by a comma. A period was used instead.
- The writer wished to use a new sentence but accidentally forgot to provide a subject for the presentation. Hence the incomplete though process presentation.
The writer should have presented 2 supporting reasous in the explanation. Based on the 2 reasoning paragraphs format in relation to the provided opinion, no comparative discussion should be found. Therefore this essay will be judged as not having met the minimum word count and, will be scored only on opinion related discussion points. |
## the local tv productions should be promoted more
It is true that foreign films are likely to gain more attention than the local ones. There might be some reasons to illuminate this effect and I believe that the government should take actions to subsidize the domestic film industry.
There are several reasons why people go in for foreign-produced series rather than ones produced in their own country. A possible reason could be that producers invest a huge budget into such filming products for providing them with special effects, distinctive scenes in spectacular locations. "Avatar", James Bond's films or the latest one "King Kong" of Hollywood blockbusters are the practical examples which receive a global appeal. Another reason could be the appearance of famous actors and actresses or the accomplishments of producers and directors. Compare with top filmmakers in the world, some countries do not succeed yet because of the low input or poor quality.
From my perspective, the governments should tackle to solve the problems above via support in terms of finance. In fact, potential talented filmmakers can exist anywhere in the world and they need an opportunity to show off their ability. With the fund given, not only do governments have a chance to grow the economy with the rise of film sales and tourist numbers but also have a high reputation from the film and tourism industry.
To conclude, I believe that the financial support from the government could help to advance the quality of local products as well as allow them to compete with the foreign products dominating in the filming market. | It is true
There is no need to declare a truth in this matter. The topic is merely for discussion purposes and not subject to a debate. A simple restatement, without exaggerated references such as these will do. An academic tone will be better achieved without it.
There might be some reasons to illuminate
Are you saying that there are no reasons for the discussion? In which case this paragraph will have failed to deliver a clear opinion statement and reasoning line. Where there is no clear opinion and thesis statement, the paragraph will have neglected to meet opinion clarity and response format directions.
There are several reasons why people go in for foreign-produced series rather than ones produced in their own country.
This is a mere repetition of the topic restatement. That must be done only twice. Once in the restatement paragraph and the other in the recap. It does not need to be done in the reasoning and discussion paragraphs.
The discussion paragraphs are acceptable and deliver clear explanations. However, the s punctuation marks that help deliver thought clarity are feuer and far between, showing a lack of sentence structure knowledge. There are also a feW misused words in the presentation, but none that would result in too much of word usage and grammar usage score deduction.
The conclusion lacks a topic reference but that can be deduced from the information presentation. It would do you score well to include that next time as a reverse paraphrase inclusion. |
***Prompt: Many students choose to take a gap year before starting university, to travel or gain work experience.***
## Do you think this is a good idea or a waste of time?
Most students tend to go straight for university right after their graduation. However, there has been a popular trend to take a year off before attending college among youngsters. From my perspective, having a year off to take journeys, or to pick up some more knowledge is totally beneficial for future students.
Firstly, it is immensely helpful to take a gap year before becoming a university students emotionally. For example, imminent students can utilize their free time to make journeys, or to have fun in vacations. And I believe that having some time to relax, and to settle down mentally is absolutely reasonable because in order to graduate high school, students have spent loads of their time to study, and to overcome the tests, so it is nice if they can have fun for a while.
Secondly, youngsters can also gain new real-life experiences which may be useful for academic purposes could not found in schools. For instance, many gap-year takers have their first jobs or part-time jobs which related to chosen majors in college. Therefore, those can obtain experiences, and save money for their tuition fees spontaneously. Therefore, having some time off instead of jumping right into studying after finishing high school is quite good for students' university life.
In summary, a gap year can be really necessary and crutial for a certain amount of students who have just finished taking the entrance examination. Because 12 months free are enough for students to prepare themselves mentally and emotionally before heading to campuses. So if it is possible and in need, feel free to take a gap year.
- 299 words - | Good work on the restatement + opinion. It is clear, adherent to the original presentation, and properly formatted in terms of response format expectations. In fact, the writer shows a clear understanding of the discussion expectations. The reasons are on point and do not stray from the onginal. The explanations and examples are cohesive and coherent. A hugely important scoring aspect is continuously met. This is a well developed discussion essay but, it is far from perfect.
The writer has a tendency to use English slang such as
students have spent loads of their time to study
rather than the formal academic presentation. The proper reference is, "a great deal of time". More familiarity with Singular V. Plural rules is also needed as the writer mired the use of a singular indefinite article (a) with a plural word form (students). |
## Is it healthier to live in the countryside?
In the state-of-the-art world, there has been a predisposition that people pay significantly more attention to their health. While it is thought that living in rural areas is advantageous for people to enhance their healthy lifestyle, I still hold the view that there are plenty of existing merits for humans' health when they reside in big cities.
On the one hand, it is undeniable that the quality of the environment is a crucial aspect that primarily contributes to a healthy life of citizens living in the countryside. The industrialization, which exacerbates polluted problems, does not exist in rural areas, so people residing in those areas can breathe the fresh air, and drink purified water. It is transparent that countrysides' dwellers rarely suffer from health problems such as air hunger and allergies, and it is easier to maintain their healthy lifestyle.
On the other hand, cities' inhabitants have vast chances to approach modern facilities and equipment in order to improve their mental and physical health. By the means of technological advances, urban areas can provide their citizens with plenty of medical facilities so that these people can check and cure their ailments earlier, which is totally beneficial for health. Furthermore, because of a developed economy, authorities of big cities can spend a wide range of money on building and restoring infrastructures, particularly hospitals and health centres. Besides, exercise instruments are also equipped sufficiently in public parks, so people can work out whenever they want without payment.
To recapitulate, although there may be a positive scenario for inhabitants' health when they settle in bucolic provinces, I can not ignore the multitude of health benefits that cutting-edge technologies and modern amenities in urban areas bring for dwellers. | I still hold the view
It is not only your opinion on the discussion topic that is needed to complete your opinion statement. The need to answer via "To what extent do you agree or disagree ?" must be represented before anything else. A combined response would work in this case. A combined response would be presented like:
Due to a personal preference, I still **STRONGLY** hold the view that...
The highlighted word is the " extent" response needed by the prompt question. Such a combined thought statement creates a highly responsive presentation and recieves a better accuracy consideration. The reason for the opinion is clear, it is the expected response that was not
provided creating an incomplete response in the process.
On the one han
On the other hand
Please remember that an extent essay is a single opinion defense writing test. it is not the task of the writer to convince the reader that lboth sides have a good reason to be believed. Rather, the paper must convince the reader, using at least 2 valid reasons, that your opinion is the correct one and must be believed. Only the opinion defense paragraph will be considered for scoring. The presentation is weak and incomplete due to the lack of supporting discussion points.
can not
This is written as one word to deliver the meaning you want to convey. |
## [Writing Task 2] NEWSPAPER TOPIC
*In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?*
In this day and age, people tend to use information collection by mobile devices. Thus, many readers have chosen electronic newspapers instead of printed ones because they are not only convenient but also free of charge. That could lead to the extinction of the printed newspapers in the future. From my perspective, I agree with this statement because of the benefits of electronic journalism offered.
There is a large quantity of reasons that account for the magnitude of e-papers, the most basic one is that without paying. E-papers not only permit people to approach the newest news daily and hourly but also access users from all over the world. Because it has extremely fast transmission frequency and speech, whenever there is new information, the electronic papers will automatically update. Therefore, the audience does not have to wait until the release time. In addition, through e-journal people can still get news about the issues they care about with only mobile devices and the Internet; hence, people will not fritter your time away from going outside and buying newspapers.
The second reason is that information storage capacity. It is clear that e-papers are not limited in terms of format, pages as well as data transmitted compared to printed newspapers. Thus, it can provide a large number of news in a rich and detailed way many times more than other types of newspapers. Moreover, the data will be grouped quite scientifically together by topics along with being stored for a long time in the specific intervals so that the readers can easily research.
In conclusion, online newspapers are an optimal alternative to printed ones that people can choose to use due to its convenience. | I agree
Please format the response based on the prompt requirement. Offer a measured degree for your opinion. Basically, the restatement is correct but the opinion only partially adheres to the needed response.
The reasoning paragraphs are not grammatically accurate in terms of sentence structure and word usage. However, the sentence problems did not result in a confusing or unclear presentation. The examiner will still understand the point of the sentence and aim of the paragraph. More exercises in terms of sentence clarity in partnership with word usage will help. Word choice sentence exercises would be best.
The conclusion is not correct. This must present a clear summary of the preceding discussion. A 40 word or 2 sentence summary is needed in this section. |
## future stars among participants in the televised talent shows
Finding talented people is very important for society. Thus, many televised talent shows have become widely popular in many communities this day. I think that this is a good method to find people who is talented but it's at all.
Initially, my country has many shows like Vietnam got talent, Road to Olympia, ... In given shows, candidates will be asked many questions or show their abilities that make people amazed. These shows help to find people who is talented base on their knowledge or abilities. Some student got scholarship for transformation, some people have become popular. The talent that these shows found are useful for live, for society and for development of human.
However, beside many good shows are many bad shows. They are all entertainment not more. Candidates who participate in show for viewer useless abilities, make them laugh and win the prize. I find that these shows are a way for many entertainment studios pr them or make financial. We can call many abilities showed by candidates are talent, but with me, talent must help people and can be developed.
Besides, we have other ways to find talented people. Likewise organizing a competition or give scholarship for students who do well in education.
Inclusion, I think that televised talent shows are good methods to find people who is talented, they help society find talented people but in a different way, people do it for earning money. | I think
Use a more convincing phrase. something that reflects a clear opinion on your part. This sentence is confusing because at the end you said:
but it's at all.
Did you mean to say that you are certain about your opinion? Or, not? The task score is reliant on the way that you deliver your opinion with a sense of belief and proper support for your supported opinion. The lack of opinion clarity is what creates a problem in your prompt restatement + opinion presentation.
, ...
Why do Vietnamese students consistently insist on using a comma and ellipses simultaneously? This is the most common and irritating grammar and punctuation usage error of these students collectively. It is also the most common GRA scoredown cause that examiners apply. You are all being taught improper punctuation usage in the English language by your schools. Use one punctuation mark at a time. That is the unbreakable English punctuation rule. One at atime, never successively. The sentence loses all logic in terms of idea presentation, emotions, and thought clarity. The reader never knows what a Vietnamese student is trying to say when these successive punctuation marks are used. This is a GRA fail.
for development of human.
Human what? The thought presentation is incomplete. Learn to think and write in English, with a proper subject - verb agreement at all times.
Inclusion
Did you mean, "In conclusion"? The student has serious grammar and vocabulary problems that will definitely cause him to fail the test. |
## people who donated money for charity
The diagram illustrates the proportion of people who donated money for charity by different age group in Britain in two years 1999 and 2010.Overall the number of people giving money to charity tended to decrease and it concentratedon the 51 to 65 group instead of the 36-50 in 1999.
To begin with , in 1999 people who were 36-50 years old spent much money on charity than other age groups. From 51 to 65, people took the second place with 35% , 10% less than the first group. The proportion of people over 65 and those aged 26-35 years old who donated money were the same.The youth age from 18 to 25 was ranked last with over 5%.
Regarding 2010, the statistic had dramatically changed. The 51-65 age group won a vantage position with nearly 40%. The percentage of the 35-50 age group fell fastly to 35% ,as the same as the 51-65 in 1999. The elderly over 65 increased slightly, equal to percentage of the 36-50 group. In contrast, the 26-35 declined sharply, falling to only 24%. Standing in the last place was still the 18-25 , this ratio doubled compared to the original to orginal. | The diagram
Wrong image reference. Even without seeing the actual image I know that a diagram was not presented. Why? The information provided are ratio measurements.These are always presented in one of 2 forms:
- A comparative line chart
- A bargraph series
A diagram is used only for procedural discussions. Is the presentation summary accurate then? No. The wrong image identifier immediately makes this task summary inaccurate. The summary is also difficult to follow and recall.That is because of the compressed data presentation per sentence. Please remember that a clear sentence contains one idea per presentation. This is a weak summary overview.
The proportion of people over 65 and those aged 26-35 years old who donated money were the same.
Standing in the last place was still the 18-25 , this ratio doubled compared to the original to orginal.
At what rate? This reference is not clear. The wording is inaccurate once again.As a report, always use the factual measurements to meet the C + C requirements. |
## the devastated environment
Due to the prosperous development of tourism, the rate of people traveling around the world exhibits an upward trend over time. However, owning to this problem, it results in some negative impacts on the environment.
Many countries rely on tourism to underpin their economy, which makes local shops and businesses more thriving. While tourists lead the detrimental effects on the environment at the same time such as water pollution, air pollution, and vandalism. For example, there is a famous country for its heritage and gorgeous scenery, Thailand. Because of the successful publicity from the tourism bureau, the local shops and restaurants benefit from a large number of travelers who come from all over the world, especially in the peak season. Unfortunately, some travelers not only throw the garbage randomly also damage the relics intentionally. In addition, a soar increasing demand for transportation attributes to traffic congestion, making carbon dioxide emissions much more than before. These problems let the government pay much cost in the preservation and encountering the dilemma between economy and environment.
Nevertheless, these adversities can be solved and taken care of it. The government must take action.The legislative can introduce the legislation for the travelers, making the fine for throwing crashes or the behavior of damaging environment. Also, each local government can advocate the tourists taking public transportation to experience more local people's life. Furthermore, local tourism cannot be overexploited to attract more vacation goers.
In conclusion, in spite that sightseeing can learn cultural differences and more cross-cultural communication with each other, as long as the environment be devastated in a long term and can't afford it, we have to pay the price to reconstruct. | owning
Word choice error. Owning refers to possessing something. Owing, the proper word to use, refers to a cause or causes as in "because of" or "due to". The student has a problem with homophones that must recieve immediate attention to avoid the same error going forward. These sorts of word mistakes have serious negative word and grammar scoring issues.
However, owning to this problem, it results in some negative impacts on the environment.
Please provide a discussion topic response for each question next time to help you meet the discussion clarity requirements of the task. A summarized discussion at this point with the overall score.
While tourists ...and vandalism.
Incomplete sentence presentation. Opening the sentence with "While " indicates a reason or result of actions will be presented. There was no results presentation so this will confuse the reader due to the lack of reference clarity. |
***Scientists say that in the future humanity will speak the same language.***
## Is it a positive or negative development?
In the current era that people throughout the world are becoming more and more connective to each other than ever before, scientists predict that in the near future, everyone in our planet is going to use just one general language for communicating. In fact, this development would introduce both positive and negative aspects, due to all of its benefits and drawbacks which have been brought to our society.
On the one hand, the most noticeable advantage when it comes to the strengths is that people no longer have to learn foreign language anymore. Indeed, there is no doubt that were global residents to speak and share their information through only one method, there would be no need to add some other popularly-used ones like English, French or Chinese into the educational curriculum of school and university. Moreover, citizens coming from myriads of nations would be able to communicate even better and at a deeper level without any dependance on translating instrumentals or "language barrier" on a daily basis, which, to some extents, raise the comprehensive development of a diversity of industries such as tourism or co-operation, for instance.
On the other hand, in terms of the opposite side, the risk of losing the variety of cultures should not also be overlooked, especially in an age that its role has already been raised by a multitude of countries. Needless to say, a majority of nations out there always consider their language as the soul of the whole people, making it an unchangeable position in their national and historical values. Undoubtedly, those countries are all proud of their traditional legacy and the born of an "one for all" language, paradoxically, would also mean that those conventional ones are likely to be eliminated.
In conclusion, the trend shows effects on both sides which are all need to be taken into consideration. There are plus points regarding the convenience in communicating as well as the elimination of language barrier, but conversely, also some minus ones related to the corruption of traditional and national languages in the diversity of cultures. | this development would introduce both positive and negative aspects
So which aspect do you support in this discussion? Remember, this is a single s discussion. Nowhere are you asked to "discuss both views" so that type of reasoning is not used in this discussion.
benefits and drawbacks
This is a totally different type of prompt and essay discussion. Do not confuse yourself. Use only the orginally provided discussion instruction. Altering the discussion will result in a failing essay.
\* The student shows clear signs of weak English comprehension skills due to his confusing restatement + s presentation. He failed to connect with the original writing instructions
An incorrect comparative discussion format has been used in the essay. Further enforcing the student's misunderstanding of the writing instructions and, creating the impression that he does not have a clear opinion based on the given guidelines. It is unlikely this essay will recieve a passing mark. |
***In the future, nobody will read printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying.
## To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?***
(Write at least 250 words)
The technological and digital advancement has brought about numerous development in human society and apparently, media - communication is not an exception. The swift popularity of televisions, computers, smart phones and other modern technological devices has switched people's habit of reading printed newspapers or books to reading online without being charged. In my point of view, this trend will increasingly be prevalent in the near future because of the advantages of easy access and good savings.
First of all, reading online now is easier than ever when people can access to the latest news or updated books by utilizing smart phones or computers which are mostly must - own items for everybody. Comparing to commuting to bookstores, libraries or newspapers shops to get a real printed version, picking information online is much more convenient. Furthermore, by going online, readers are able to seek for specific information they need and even watch related videos or hear relevant audios, which is far more lively and enjoyable.
In addition, the fee for accessing online newspapers now is almostly free of charge while people have to pay for traditional printed newspapers if they have needs for them. In addition, it also takes time and money for paper delivering and distributing service, which is somehow costly. For books, there are currently phone applications and devices for reading books online such as Google Books, Apple Books, Watpad or Kindle in which you can have access to many books with minimal costs compared to printed form.
In a nutshell, online reading offers readers numerous benefits such as handy accessibility and low cost. I believe that this new form of reading will soom became prominent and gradually alter traditional printed books and newspapers. | this trend will increasingly be prevalent
Prompt deviation. you are not responding to the given question which is,
TO WHAT EXTENT DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE WITH THIS STATEMENT?
. Sadly, this improper understanding of the discussion focus shall result in a failing discussion compliance score. You cannot create your own discussion topic. You must provide a discussion in response to the given presentation at all times.
While you will receive a score for the remaining sections, you cannot expect to be given a passing score when you have proven an inability to understand/comprehend English instructions. That is an automatic failure on your part. since the reverse paraphrase commits the same mistake, it is clear that this is a comprehension problem and not an oversight meant to be corrected in the end. |
## the best way to solve the world's environmental problems is to increase the cost of fuel
it is sometimes argued about increasing the price of fuels is the world's environmental problem that needs to be under consideration. Although growth in fuel can have many drawbacks to international progress, this essay agrees that the price of fuel is the primary contributor.
There is no question that the advent of modern transportation, as well as increasing number of population,, the factor about time-saving and safe travelling, is on the priority. As a result, the consumption of unrenewable sources leads to traffic congestion such as the greenhouse effect, air pollution, so on. Alternatively, if the government enforces the rule about cost fuel, the company manufacture products that change the direction of using alternative sources and simultaneously climbing the cost of products. This has a considerable impact on the poor and the vulnerable because they do not afford and burden their financial budget about travelling.
That being said, it can see that the strict rule about cost fuel makes residents not reliance on fossil fuel. Furthermore, it is a chance for growing the consumption and technique of consuming and strengthen the dimension of renewable energy. Taking, for example, overload of traffic, a large number of gas and fume is exhausted from vehicles is the key reason making the quality of life more atrocious. It has evidence that there is a lot of disagreement and resentment without clear interpretation is boomed in many places in the world on the purpose of fighting against the ineffectiveness policy.
In summary, although the side of protecting the environment plays pivotal part in our life but increasing cost is not main measure of saving ecosystem. In my opinion, this affair should be under careful consideration. | You have forgotten to respond to the primary question in the required format. An immediate jump to your opinion reason, rather than providing a proper extent response first, delivers an incomplete restatement + opinion paragraph. Therefore, the actual task requirement in relation to the discussion question has not been met. This paragraph instead, creates an alternate discussion point that is not related to the task with the following reason:
Although growth in fuel can have many drawbacks to international progress, this essay agrees that the price of fuel is the primary contributor.
This unrelated response fails to meet task requirements. It offers an unexpected response. Therefore, the discussion is an incorrect prompt response.
,,
Proof-read and edit. One punctuation mark at a time.
the consumption of unrenewable sources leads to traffic congestion such as the greenhouse effect, air pollution, so on
Unrenewable sources are not connected to traffic congestion, but could lead to the other 2 reasons. The sentence lacks competent reasoning and shows a problematic coherence discussion.
Based on these 2 reasons alone, it will suffice to say that the essay is a non-passing piece of writing. |
## (IELTS TASK 1) INTERNATIONAL MIGRATION IN UK
The chart illustrates the rate of immigration, emigration, and net migration in the UK from 1999 to 2008.
Overall, it is clear that UK immigration and emigration experienced a rise over the period shown, but a much higher rate of immigrants in comparison with emigrants. Net migration peaked in 2004 and 2007.
In 1999, the immigration rate was about 450,000 people, while the figures for emigration and net migration registered around 300,000 and 180,000 respectively. From 1999 to 2004, the number of people who immigrated to the UK rose by nearly 150,000 people. However, there was just a small growth in emigration from 300,000 people in 1999 to around 350,000 in 2002 before remaining at a similar level until 2004. Net migration peaked at about 250,000 people in 2004.
After 2004, the immigration rate remained stable until 2008, while emigration saw a significant fluctuation. To clarify, the rate of emigration declined suddenly to over 320,000 people in 2007 before reaching plateau at over 400,000 in 2008. As a result, net migration increased considerably to around 240,000 people in 2007 before falling back to over 150,000 in 2008.
* | from 1999 to 2008
You forgot to mention the measurement used as a part of the summary overview. Always include that as this is often highlighted as a part of the image data.
Overall, it is clear that UK immigration and ... in comparison with emigrants.
This is a confusing sequence. pick one of the present or seperate the sentences, ideas to create a trending paragraph instead. Do not use both if you cannot provide a clear reason for it.
Net migration peaked in 2004 and 2007.
This is unnecessary when you are providing 2 trending sentences. Do not over-inform the trend as it gets confusing to understand and will cause grammar range issues for the examiner.
in 2002 before remaining at a similar level until 2004
You need a comma here. It appears that your problem in this essay is with GRA considerations. |
## The provided picture dedicates the small-scale process in which the fish is smoked.
Overall, there are 8 main steps in this production. It starts with preprocessing raw fish and ends with delivering to consumers.
In the first step, the fish is cleaned with a knife and then it is soaked in saltwater. Before being smoked, the fish is cooked for 5 minutes.
In the fifth step, chefs use many wood vats in which there is smudging to smoke the fish. After being smoked, it is put yellow color to become more eye-catching. Following that, the smoked fish is packed in many boxes. Finally, those boxes are put in trucks and delivered to consumers.
* | I cannot proceed with a full review of this essay as it will not recieve a passing score. The deductions are great when the writer provides less than 150 words in the presentation. Kindly remember that providing less than the minimum word count will prevent the essay from recieving a passing score consideration.
Do not use caps Lock when writing the summary. Do notuse bold text either. Both are considered forums of writing disrespect equivalent to shouting at the examiner. Simply with the summary in a normal manner as the rest of the essay.
Provide a full 3 paragraph presentation next time. One summary + trending sentence and 2 procedure explanation groups. That will help you meet all formatting requirements. |
***Many people nowadays don't feel safe either when they are at home or go out.***
## What are the reasons? What can we do to solve this problem?
In line with the development of society, more concerns related to indoor and outdoor security bother people. This essay will analyze the causes behind and address the solutions also.
In light of modernization, technology and intense office schedule are inevitable on a daily basis. These first can be seen in several problems related to online platforms as more sophisticated frauds now are ubiquitous thanks to the digital advancement. Cyber criminals may take advantage of insecurity of personal information to jeopardize the victim's properties. Moreover, the industrial revolution has led to the hectic schedule in office, which requires workers to prompt for their job more frequently. If employees take traffic jams for granted as they are put under pressure to hurry, they may encounter unexpected accidents on the road which do harms to their physical health.
Thus there need to be some remedies implemented to tackle these issues such as laws introduced by the governments. As the laws can inhibit illegal tricks on social media and penalize those in charge to set an examples for the others not to commit it again. Furthermore, these laws will be the alert to citizens to perceive this hazardous kind of criminal and avoid it. Additionally, the authority can utilize these policies to regulate the workflow and reduce the burden in terms of time on workers to enable them to comfortably prepare for work and reduce the traffic incidences as a consequence .
In conclusion, to my knowledge, such great developments in countries are the factors behind the feelings of insecurity of many people. Hopefully, aforementioned solutions can contribute to solving these issues and can calm people down. | There are specific discussion net up being asked. Why did you not offer the quick topis responses that would have helped to establish the discussion accuracy requirement? The task 2 essays always require direct responses or opinion statements in the first paragraph. You must never repeat the discussion requirements because those are non-scorable and are in fact, score lowering presentations . There are only 2 ways to address the Task 2 establishing discussions:
- Restatement + opinion ( Agree or disagree question)
- Restatement + direct responses (Direct questions)
online platforms as more sophisticated frauds
This is where the actual response begins. Try to open with topic sentences per paragraph. Restate your question responses to indicate the paragraph topic. This shows more of your ability to keep the presentation in line with the questions provided. |
## Essay about the benefits of team sports and individual sports - (IELTS WRITING TASK 2)
*Some people think that it is more beneficial to take part in sports which are played in teams, like football, while other people think that taking part in individual sports, like tennis or swimming, is better. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Write at least 250 words.*
Some people attest that team sports have more positive impacts on public health, while others claim there are far more benefits in playing individual sports. Although team sports are bound to keep fit, I also agree that single sports also improve athleticism.
On the one hand, dual sports indeed develop teamwork, which plays an indispensable part in the working environment. When cooperating with other teammates, people are more likely to deal with conflict circumstances so it teaches them problem-solving skills and reasoning skills. On top of that, a strong bond between partners is required to win the game, therefore, it is crucial to comprehend your teammates, which might be the major criterion in doing group work. Secondly, these sports involve competitiveness in which each player has to put in a lot of hard work to assure a position in the team. This may push them to their limits and motivate everyone to try their best. For instance, football players tend to be more persistent and spirited since they are often trained in a competitive environment.
On the other hand, there are also several pros when playing single sports. Since there is no external aid besides your efforts, these sports foster your individualism. According to a report in New York, athletes engaged in tennis and swimming are more self-contained since they spend hours on end training alone and focusing on themselves, hence, knowing their weaknesses and strength to improve. Moreover, these sports-type requires every body part to function, resulting in well-rounded players in this field such as Federer or Djokovic. This explains why badminton and tennis professionals are specialists in handling and running because these two sports not only forces players to master serving skill but also emphasizes the need in speed.
In conclusion, it is believed that team sports are ranked first in keeping fit, while single sports supporters opine the opposite. I argue that these two categories are equally important for their paramount benefits to our health condition and daily life. | dual sports indeed develop teamwork
Is this a personal opinion or a public perception? Where in the seperation of the discussion based on individual references? Avoid a general statement as this tends to remove the POV reference as needed in the presentation.
competitive environment
Where is your personal opinion? Are you aiming for the 4 or 5 paragraph response version? The essay is lacking in clarity at this point.
According to a report in New York
No researched information. Use only personal or public known data. Frame the sentences properly to avoid this score reducing error.
I argue that t
Should be the 3rd stand alone paragraph. The personal opinion must be fully developed. It must follow the writing manner of the first 2. The examiner will reject this opinion asa part of the concluding summary. This is a score reduction basis. |
## the Importance of some school's subjects
Personally, I think physical education is an important subject that students should attend. Thus, it's preferable to stop art and music classes instead and that for two main reasons.
First, students need to keep fit and healthy. Sports play an essential role in the learning journey of students inside schools. For example, it helps them to raise their attention span, clear their mind and aids them to reduce stress. Also, this subject needs a large space to practice it. that means that is not possible to do it at home and must go to special places for it like a stadium.
what's more, art and music can be learned at home with the help of parents. for instance, they can draw, dance, listen to music, or even learn from the internet and apply what had learned. Furthermore, it can be integrated with other school subjects. such as English, history, or any other language. Art and music are always learned within other school classes. So, stopping this class will not have a bad impact on student progress.
Thus, eliminating art and music will be the best choice since the students can still learn it from other materials. Then, they can keep attending sports subjects that they like to stay fit and have good health. | The writer failed to meet the 250 word requirement. This will automatically prevent the writer from achieving a passing score since there are applicable percentage deductions applied when the word count is not met. More missing words will result in more deductions. This essay only has 213 words. One can only imagine the amount of deductions that will be applied.
Scores will still be applied to the remaining sections but, it will not be enough to overcome the deductions. Always check the word count. That is normally the reason students fail the test. Aim to write 5 sentences per paragraph to meet the word requirement.
I believe the wordcount situation occured due to the incomplete restatement + opinion paragraph. Rephrase the original topic properly, include the reason for the discussion, then give your opinion. That is the 2nd big error in this presentation. |
**TOPIC:
## The graph below shows the average number of UK commuters travelling each day by car, bus or train between 1970 and 2030**
The line graph compares the daily travel of commuters using three different transportations during 1970 to 2030.
It is clear that car had the highest number of people using and increased through the years. Furthermore, travelling by train observed a moderate growth while bus transportation witnessed a notable decline.
In 1970, car travelling had the highest number at five million people while it was four million by bus and under three million by train. Over the following 30 years, the commuters ride by car and train gradually grew by around one million but the figure for riding by bus mildly fell.
By 2030, workers travelling by car will increase to its peak at 9 million people and train is likely to markedly bounce to over four million passengers. In contrast, commuters travelling by bus are predicted to drop under three million people. | There will be a word percentage deduction applied to the preliminary score for presenting only 142 out of the mandatory 150 word minimum. Though not a large deduction, it may still be enough to prevent a passing consideration based on other errors present in the report. By ensuring that the presentation has 150 words at all times , the preliminary deductions can be avoided. Word count deductions often result in failing reports.
The main reason why the writer failed to meet the word count is due to the brief writing style used. There is no accurate analysis of the image information beyond the I sentence ppresentation. Adding another sentence, creating the standard 3 sentence paragraph for the Task 1essay can solve the issue and result in a passing score. |
## Fatherhood is important as motherhood. Discuss
Fatherhood and motherhood roles continue a controversial topic in the days and ages. In Western countries, child - rearing is accepted as a responsibility of both parents. Nevertherless, in the less developed countries, a father still holds more traditional role as a breadwinner. I will discuss the both sides
Many people embrace the idea that taking care of children is the mother's mission. They think a mother should stay at home and look after children instead of going out and earning the living. In the contrary, the responsibility of a father is to make sure the household finance is sufficent, and spend time to rear children will interfere with his ability to financially support
From my perspective, a child has been reared by both father and mother will develop fully physical and emotional sides. It is serious if you take fatherhood for granted. A father will raise the child up when he falls or play with his child as a peer. Futhermore, I strongly believe that a father can best teach their childen qualities such as courage, confidence and enthusiasm. | The essay automatically garners severe word count penalties for containing only 180 words when the minimum is 250. This indicates the nability of the examinee to carryon a lengthy academic conversation in written form. Perhaps this was caused by limited English vocabulary. Perhaps, he was unfamiliar with the standard 4 paragraph writing format (This only has 3 paragraphs). Whatever the reason, an effort to present an extended discussion in written form is necessary.
I will discuss the both sides
There are only 2 applicable prompts for this topic:
- What is your opinion?
- To what extent do you agree or disagree?
The writer is not using either of the standard prompts. It appears that he either:
- Misunderstood the prompt
- Created his own prompt by accident
Either reason will be enough to fail the test based on an inaccurate response. It can therefore be.said, that there are several major reasons this essay is not going to help the test-taker pass the test. |
***With a growing world population, one of the most pressing issues is that of feeding such a large number of people. Some people think that GM foods offer a viable solution to this problem.***
## To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Humankind plays an important part in the development of the world. The more we grow and reproduce the more issues our world must solve increase as well. One of the main problems is famine. Famine can cause a lot of harmfulness on the world status which included the world's economy or daily life or a human being, .... Etc. Some people tend to think that GM foods might be a solution to this situation. There is some research has
been conducted which point out the pros and cons of consuming GM foods. By reading various research I agree that GM foods can solve famine. Two reasons for that is the use of pesticides in agriculture and GM technology produce more crop yield compared to the normal way.
Firstly, GM foods don't need to use pesticides to increase the supply they pull out. Using pesticides is not strange at all in our farming routine. There is several articles indicate that the disadvantage of pesticide on human's health is more than the benefit they brought to the world. For example, pesticides consist of various chemicals considered to be harmful to the consumer's health which sometimes lead to cancer. GM foods are considered to be healthier than non-organic kind. Genetically Modified supplies are likely to produce equal or even higher crops than the usual agricultural ways.
The solution for supplying a huge population is simply think as the more the population grows the consumption of supplies are increase too. To be able to do that the amount of foods has to be enlarged also. GM foods are the optimal method suitable for this. Not only GM foods are healthier than other products, but they can produce a lot more crops also. The whole world should agree that GM foods are the solution for the feeding issue by their benefits brought to us.
In the end, we must all be using GM foods in our daily life. GM foods are healthier and acted as a solution to feeding a huge population as well. | The essay does not follow the 2 discussion parameters required. These writing criteria are:
- To what extent do you agree or disagree
- Discuss based on personal experience, knowledge, or public information
The primary scoring consideration is based upon how well the exam taker understood the discussion question and, if he provided an appropriate opinion statement. While the student appears to have understood the topic, he did not:
- Present an accurate restatement
- Provide a response according to the stated discussion manner
Failure to provide these have resulted in a non- passing presentation. Additional deductions will apply in the grammar structure section as the writer showed unfamiliarity with English writing rules by using 2 successive punctuation marks in a sentence:
daily life or a human being, .... Etc.
. Creating nonsensical writing and causing confusion for the reader. The appearance of the shorcut word " etc." is also further evidence of the writers little knowledge of academic writing rules.
While there are other reasons this essay will not pass, these are the major failings that will cause it. |
## Stats regarding video games players
The given graph illustrates the proportion of people in various age groups spending over 10 hours per week playing video games from 1984 to 2003.
Overall, it is evident that the percentage of people playing video games more than 10 hours a week of all age groups all increased during the given period. Furthermore, the figure for the 15 to 24-years-old was by far the highest during the whole period.
In 1984, the percentage of people in the 15-24 age group was highest, at approximately 20%, while the figures for 7-14-year-olds and 25-35-year-olds were considerably lower at roughly 13% and 8% respectively. Meanwhile, only 2% of people who were aged over 35 did this activity. Between 1996 and 2000, the proportion of 15-24-year-old people sharply fluctuated and reached the highest point of around 52%, while the figures for persons aged 7-14 and 25-34 changed slightly to just over 20%. Conversely, the trend of people aged 35+ went up steadily to just under 20%.
In 2003, the proportion of persons who were 15-25 decreased slightly to approximately 50% and became the highest figure in the table, while there were significant increases to roughly 35% and 30% in the figures for people aged 7-14 and 25-34. Meanwhile, the figure for people aged 35 and over experienced a dramatic rise of around 25%. | An effective summary overview Uses at least 3 sentences. Each sentence contains one descriptive information presentation. These seperate sentences make it easier to follow the flow of information. It is scannable and easy to remember as opposed to the current run-on sentence. While the single sentence is complete. it is confusing in the sense that there is no subject center present. Which is why single sentence presentations are more score friendly.
Furthermore, the figure ... during the whole period.
This is nota trend. This is data presentation which should be in the report body. Actual data is not provided in the summary or trend. Only the first sentence is an actual trend.
The rest of the reporting data appears acceptable. I cannot fully review the presentation without the image reference. |
***The chart shows the percentage of women and men in one Asian country who passed when they took their driving test between 1980 and 2010.***
## Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The graph illustrates the proportion of males and females passing the driving test from 1980 to 2010.
Overall, it can be seen that the driving test passed by women and men increased over the period. In addition, women passing this test higher than men on the given chart.
Looking at the chart in more detail, it is evident that the driving test pass rate of women stood at about 48% in 1980 and then rose to just around 50% in 1990. This figure then continued to go up significantly to nearly 70% in the next ten years, which was the highest point on the given graph. Subsequently, the proportion of passing rate driving test of females went down to approximately 64% at the end of the period.
Turning to the second data set, it is obvious that there was a dramatic increase in the percentage of men passing the driving test from about 28% in 1980 to around 38% in 1990. This figure then rose to just under 50% in 2000 and remain stable until the year 2010.
*please give me the score in the IELTS test, my target is band 6.*
* | In addition, women passing this test higher than men on the given chart.
A trending statement indicates the major flow movement of the measurement. The reference above is the properly referenced trend of the bar chart. The first reference is not really a trend as if references both genders as equal in consideration.
The graph illustrates
Wrong image identification. The image is a bar chart, not a graph.A graph is composed of a fluctuating measurement line or series of lines. A bar graph uses fluctuating bars as seen above.
The comparison report is uneven. Do not focus on only one gender, leaving the second barely reviewed. Aim to compare the images using a uniform criteria. Review the second part with the same representation considerations. If one has 3 sentences then, the other should too. |
Essay IELTS - Children nowadays watch significantly more television than than in the past
**Children nowadays watch significantly more television than in the past, which reduces their activity levels accordingly. Why is this case? What measures can you suggest to encourage higher levels of activity among children?**
In many years recent, the rate of youngsters watching television amplification in a hurry. Absolutely, the number is more tempestuous than in the past. So the television is a tendency which takes the edge off children's activities. There are multifarious reasons leading to this phenomenon and various strategies to encourage them to be more active.
Essentially, the development of technology is more and more successful. As a result, television becomes a necessary thing in almost family. Moreover, in view of the fact that the film is procedured additionally special effect, interesting content. So all of that manufactures diverse programs which enrapture a greater number of children viewers. The other reason for the build-up of television viewing in the children is linked with the way their parents educate them. Because they let their child pay attention to television at a very early age and for a long time. Naturally, that manner makes up their predisposition to join the television. As we can see, television is a good tool to alleviate prostration. But watching television too much is turn to negative position due to kiddie's health and skill.
However, the outdoors activity such as football, badminton, cycle, swim that is a quality for kiddies to learn and grow. One approach which could be taken to galvanize young children is to recommend them to take part in beneficial groups and travel. Furthermore, the parents must be taken the time to do interesting outdoor activities and circumscribe hour's watching television.
In short, the contemporary technology, the transcendence of television's programs contribute with the education in family influence on their television watching habits. As we discussed above, there are several methods to face up to the problem of increased television viewing and decreased physical activities in today's children. | I am afraid that the writer's exaggerated form of word usage is the biggest problem with regards his writing skills. This essay sounds more like a dictionary was used for word references. The writer chose complicated sounding words and used them. Unfortunately she did not understand the meaning of the word, nor how to use it properly in a sentence. He tried too hard to impress and failed. Word usage, when done properly increases the score across all considerations. Used improperly and you end up with this failing score presentation. There is no reason for this essay to recieve a passing score in any aspect because of wrong word usage, wrong sentence structure throughout, and a lack of coherence in the thought presentations. |
*Topic:
**At present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.***
## Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
Nowadays, younger generations account for a larger share of the population in a number of nations than older generations. From my point of view, the situation is more of an advantage than a disadvantage. In spite of being less experienced, young adults are more creative and place less stress on the financial system.
First and foremost, countries where younger people are in the majority are more likely to be the cradle of creativity and innovation, and thereby stand out from others. Compared with older generations, younger generations have a better imagination and creative power. They are more capable of coming up with groundbreaking ideas and applying them. Lack of experience is admittedly their weakness, and they are less familiar with time-honored customs and norms. However, in this era when disruptive innovations mushrooms, creativity outweighs experience.
In addition, a higher proportion of young adults can help ease the financial burden of a country, since they produce less pressure on the health care system than older people. Younger people have a stronger immune system. They are less prone to illnesses, especially the chronic ones such as diabetes which can incur heavy medical bills. Therefore, the medical system is put under less strain. The country can allocate less financial resources in this respect.
In conclusion, the positive side of a younger population is more significant than the negative side. Not merely does it provide a boost to creativity, but it also produces less pressure on health care services. Thus, the state can be more competitive as well as save money. | Even though the grammar of the student does not have perfect sentence presentations, there is a sense of simple sentence formation control in the presentation. The writer has used a logical thought process and perfectly discussed the possible negatives as positives. The commonly presented counter arguements in support of the elderly was cleverly debunked by the writer. There is a clear sense of a strong written debate with a clear winning side. He clearly understood the overall approach required by the prompt. Not a bad job. While the writer may not get a superior passing score, he is definitely not going to fail with this type of presentation. |
## my favorite free time activity is traveling
One of my favorite thing I do when I have free time is traveling. I like traveling because I am an extrovert person who like discovery the world. After every journey, I have learned a lot of thing about people, culture and nature where I have gone. I always travel with my friends or my family, I don't like to travel alone, because the more the merrier. I have taken a vacation to 15 cities and provinces in Vietnam, and I also want to travel abroad to see more thing in the world. I usually research in the Internet when I first arrive in a new place. I research about the features, the traditional foods, the famous place and the taboos in which I would like to travel.
Traveling have a lot of benefits that can help you in the future. Firstly, you can learn something interesting about people, tradition and nature in which you traveled. Secondly, you can meet someone who can be your friends in the future or can teach you something that you don't know. Thirdly, you can refresh yourself after the stressful days of work or study, you can relax and have a nice time. Finally, you may discovery the new place that you have never know about there before.
So many people like traveling nowadays because they are very stressful and have pressure after work. They want to travel like a holiday that they can resort or relax to balance your life.
I think, domestic tourism will be developed in the near future. I will recommend a foreign tourist something interesting that they can do when they travel to Vietnam. The first, they should go to Ha Long Bay - a cultural heritage was recognized by UNESCO in 2010. The second, they can go to Ho Chi Minh city to see how the economic in Vietnam founded and developed? The third, discovery Vietnam's culture and nature by go to the ancient capital of Hue, or go to Phong Nha Ke Bang cave - one of the most beautiful caves in the world, or Phanxipang - the highest mountain in Viet, and so on. There are a lot of things they should try when they arrive Vietnam such as wear traditional Vietnamese clothes - ao dai, eat traditional Vietnamese food - pho, buy something in Cai Rang floating market,... Vietnam have many things so interesting that they can't find in other countries or anywhere in the world.
All of my traveling were successful, but sometimes, it still had some problems such as airline delays or bad weather. In the last journey, when I traveled to Vung Tau beach, I did not check the weather forecast before. So, three days in there was not interesting as I expected. It was rained cats and dogs; I can't go anywhere except my accommodation. If I could choose to live anywhere, I still choose Vietnam, because the weather is good, people in Vietnam are very kind and sense of human. And if the question is where I want to travel most, I will choose Canada, because of the salmon, I like salmon most. The Canada's culture is interesting too. | is traveling
Right from the start, make sure to indicate if you are referring to international or domestic travel. That way the writing direction and discussions points are obvious to the reader. The first paragraph is confusing as you represent yourself as a world or international traveller then, you take it back or change your declaration towards the end. Avoid misrepresentations or confusing claims.
Traveling have a lot of benefits that can help you in the future.
Since you are asked to talk about your travel experiences, refer to all related points in first person. Talk about what you learned, experienced, regret, and enjoy. Do not lose sight of who should be speaking and why.
I think, domestic tourism will be developed in the near future. I
How does this paragraph connect to your travel experiences? It disconnects from the top and bottom presentation as it deviates from the discussion focus. |
Writing Task 1 The chart below shows the results of a survey about people's coffee and tea buying
Sample Answer Essay IELTS Cambridge 15: Coffee and Tea Buying and Drinking Habits (Cambridge IELTS 15)
The chart below shows the results of a survey about people's coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities.
Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Write at least 150 words.
The graphic presentation illustrates the finding percentage of people purchasing and consuming coffee and tea in 5 different urban areas around Australia. Overall, what stands out from the chart is purchased fresh coffee in the last four weeks was the least popular activity whereas went to the coffee shop is the most popular in the given cities.
The peaking point of went to the coffee shop in about 1 month is in Melbourne at about 65%, in contrast, the lowest point is in Adelaide where it only reached about 50%. Consumed instant coffee in four weeks is fairly popular around the given area as it is the second most popular factor with the only exception is in Adelaide where it outweighs the number of people who went to the cafe for coffee or tea and become the prominent factor there however the highest proportion is in Brisbane where it reaches over 50%. The number of people who used fresh coffee in the last 4 weeks reaches the highest point in Sydney at about 45% while Brisbane and Adelaide witness the least popular figure in this category at about 33% and 34% respectively.
* | The graphic presentation illustrates
The image provided is niether an illustrative diagram nor a procedural presentation. The image is incorrectly identified. Please familiarize yourself with the images used in this task and memorize these. The proper image identification is needed for an accurate summary overview. Improper references reduce the accuracy score.
Information wise, the writer identified all the important data. The problem is that it is not clearly divided into 2 reporting paragraphs. A task 1 essay usually wals a total of 3 paragraphs. That is the required and thus, expected report presentation. The writer forgot about that requirement. For clarity purposes, the student must divide the paragraphs using related points. The 2 references to bought coffee should be in 1 paragraph with the bought aspect beinga seperate paragraph. |
## tourism has a very big impact in Vietnam
When was the last time you travel to another country? Did you follow the rule and enjoy the environment there? If not, you should pay some attention next time you travel.
Tourism is an important industry for some places. Vietnam isn't an exception, for some cities, tourism is the main economy. For example, Da Nang, Hue and Nha Trang. However, in the last 2 years, Corona which is a virus has been common throughout the entire world. This will bring both positive and negative for the tourism industry in Vietnam.
On the one hand, tourism has been used as the main industry and help many unemployed people to have a job. However, now when the tourism is hugely impacted by the virus. Many people were unemployed again and start to starve because of the lack of money. Furthermore, many cities are now having a big fall in the economy and the government is trying to deal with the problems.
On the other hand, in the lockdown time, when the tourism isn't working anymore. The environment is improving rapidly. Because almost no transportation is allowed to go so the air pollution is significantly reduced. This will help the tourism industry come back stronger than ever as a result of improvement in the environment.
To conclude, tourism has a very big impact in Vietnam so in the time when the virus is viral, every tourism activity has to stop. This makes a mostly negative impact on Vietnam. But in the future, these impacts can positively bring the tourism industry back. | The first paragraph is not inviting. It does not catch the reader's attention. It also does not create a solid reference to the central article focus. What is the article really about? Why should the reader be interested in tourism rules? Are you talking about rules in general or in Vietnamese wills for tourists only? When the introduction does not have any appeal, the reader won't care.
For example, Da Nang, Hue and Nha Trang
What about these places? What is this reference for? Where is the meaning or relevance? Do not write hanging sentences. The purpose is to inform the readers, not confuse them. There is no sense to this writing.
The instruction is to write an article, not an opinion paper or editorial. So why was this written as an opinion paper? |
## Topic: The use of mobile phone is as antisocial as smoking.
***Smoking is banned in certain places so mobile phone should be banned like smoking. To what extent?***
Some people believe that using mobile phones is equally harmful to society as smoking and it is, therefore, also expected to be banned. From my perspective, I am in complete disagreement with this opinion as now will be discussed.
Firstly, it is prejudiced that people compare the use of mobile phones equivalently antisocial as smoking. Since phone and tobacco are two distinctively different entities, which exist for different purposes, the comparison between them is unreasonable. Tobacco has long been proving to be detrimental to not only the smoker themselves but also the health of society at large. The use of mobile phones, admittedly, has some drawbacks, but it does not dangerous or threatens the life of anybody. For example, some critics might point out that the excessive use of smartphones is attributable to myopia, or the noise of cell phones might be an annoyance to the surrounding people. These problems, however, can be easily curbed by limiting the time on screen, or turning on the silent mode when in public areas.
Secondly, while it makes sense why tobacco should be prohibited for its deadly effect, phones have numerous benefits to our life. Ever since the introduction of mobile phones, it has revolutionized the way we communicate and how we live to the point that everybody needs a phone to work or study today. Most jobs require employees to be either available by phone, for example, doctors and police officers, or to use their phones throughout the day, as is common with businessmen and lawyers. Mobile phones even become more necessary in times of pandemic such as the Covid-19 when everybody is required to work and study from home.
In conclusion, I content that mobile phones, unlike tobacco, have insignificant drawbacks to our society. In contrast, its enormous benefits make the idea of banning phones sounds far-fetched. | as now will be discussed
Provide your discussion statement for a proper opinion statement response. The topics that you will use as reasons will allow you to create a more comprehensive summarized response.
prejudiced
Improper word usage. Prejudice refers to unreasonable feelings, opinions, or attitudes, especially of a hostile nature, regarding an ethnic, racial, social, or religious group.. There cannot be any prejudice among material things. There can however, be bias as in " I am bias towards the IPhone." Regardless.the sentence implication /meaning is incorrect.
I content
Word usage error once again. Content refers to the subjects or topics covered in a book or document. The word you are looking for is " contend" which means, " to assert or maintain earnestly" .
Work on your vocabulary. Do not use words without knowing if it applies to your writing. Use a dictionary for meaning clarification first. |
## Art classes should be compulsory in high school. Do you agree or disagree?
In my opinion, I totally agree with the statement that arts should be compulsory at school. There are two main reasons why I believe that arts are very useful in not only school but also daily life.
First of all, studying arts at school can help children to enhance their imagination and creativity. When children learn arts, they are free to express their own perspectives and interpretation of their own lives. This will help them think more flexibly and creatively. Additionally, due to the daily observation of objects during drawing, the child's brain will be boosted by the ability to observe and enhance memory, thereby nurturing the imagination.
Secondly, stress reduction is also a reason why arts should be made compulsory at school. Decades of studies have suggested that learning arts can help learners to be more relaxed. Moreover, art also helps children more in love with life when they see life through the eyes of the artist and let their souls into the painting.
Thirdly, arts make our life more vivid. Learning arts can make our life more vibrant. When learning arts, we can gain new friends and relationships. And if you are a bit talented in art, you will be admired by a lot of people. Finishing a portrait or a landscape and use it as furniture in your house can make your life more light and full of spirit.
In summary, I think that arts should be introduced as a compulsory subject at school | There are two main reasons why I believe that arts are very useful in not only school but also daily life.
The formatting of this sentence should have been divided into 2. Rather than saying there are 2 main reasons, present the reasons individually in a manner that provides an overview of the topics within the school and personal settings. Such a presentation would have added clarity and coherence to the succeeding paragraphs. That said, I must commend the writer for the creative prompt restatement.
Do not go beyond 2 reasons.The prompt isa standard 4 paragraph presentation, with a 2 paragraph reasoning allotment. It is the entry of the 3rd reason, which could have been easily merged with the second paragraph that led to the under discussed second paragraph. Without this error ,the essay would have been in a better place for a higher score since the essay only has negligible errors.
P.S. Aim for a 2 sentence conclusion as required next time. |
## IELTS WRITING TASK 2: Topic - health
Topic: Scientists tell us some activities are good for health and others are bad. Despite knowing that millions of people continue doing unhealthy activities. What are the causes and what are the solutions?
Answer:
It is true that many people keep repeating bad habits despite the fact that these habits could be detrimental to their health. While there are various reasons for this, the government can solve this problem by adjusting the law and promoting healthy activities.
The reasons why people adopt unhealthy habits are largely due to lack of time and the availability of technological devices. Firstly, the fast pace of modern life, which requires people to spend more time at work than in the past, sets a limit to the time spending on pleasurable activities. A prominent example of this argument is that many people these days have chosen fast food as a solution for their limited time in spite of all the health warnings from nutritionists. Secondly, technology is also attributed to the sedentary lifestyle of modern people. It is the convenience of digital entertainment such as video games or social networks that discourages people from engaging in outdoor activities.
Sticking to these harmful habits for a long time would lead to health deterioration. It is, therefore, urgent that the government take action to tackle this problem in the first place. The simplest measure is to impose heavy tax on unhealthy products including fast food, alcohol and tobacco whilst lifting that of organic food to encourage healthy eating patterns. Apart from that, the government can encourage citizens to get more exercise by placing sports facilities in populated areas or co-operate with educational institutions and organizations to hold more physical activities.
In conclusion, unhealthy activities are attributable to the lack of time and the utility of electrical gadgets. It rests with the government to remedy the problem. | While there are various reasons for this, the government can solve this problem by adjusting the law and promoting healthy activities.
Provide direct reasons. These reasons will help give your solution topic credibility in relation to the opinion response requirements.
Despite knowing that millions of people continue doing unhealthy activities.
The paraphrase of this reference is missing in the restatement. Always review your work for complete restatement content. Any missing reference will alter the original focus. Your essay is guilty of this alteration.
for their limited time
In relation to what activity? Complete the sentence reference to clearly connect to the mutationist reference at the end.
alcohol and tobacco
This was not referred to in the earlier discussion so do not mention it here. These references lessen the cohesiveness between paragraphs.
to hold more physical activities
How does this relate to the videogame problem? It does not. The solutions must always relate to the causes or problems in the previous paragraph for coherence purposes. |
***The best way to ensure the growth of children is to make parents take parenting courses.***
## Do you agree or disagree?
Some people argue that undertaking parental courses is the most effective way to promote children's growth. From my perspective, I entirely agree with that point of view for many reasons.
On the one hand, many parents now still depend on their instinct to nurture their children. However, that approach, in most cases, is counterproductive. One of the most notable examples is that many children are forced to materialize their parent's dreams but not theirs. As a result, they gradually lose incentives in life and are more likely to develop mental diseases, especially depression. Inevitably, their academic performance and social life will be severely affected.
On the other hand, with support from parental courses, both parents and children gain significant benefits. One notable outcome is that the gap between parents and their children becomes more tightened. With knowledge equipped from those programs, parents could have a clearer understanding of their children's thoughts. In this way, parents could deal with conflicts between two sides radically, especially the obedient ones. Furthermore, because teenagers may feel isolated from peers and the community due to their distinctive dreams and characteristics, encouragement from parents could give them the inner support to overcome such pressures, thereby reinforcing trust and mental connection between the two sides. Fortunately, such skills are provided in the parental courses.
In conclusion, with unparalleled benefits from parental courses for both children's development and the family's relation, there does exist no reason why I do not give them a favor. | I entirely agree
Do not use an extent response when not required to do so. Learn to identify the expected response format and provide it as required. While the exaggerated response looks good, points will actually be lost due to improper formatting.
On the one hand
On the other hand
Wrong reasoning format. The discussion does not ask for a comparative discussion format in the original prompt. Therefore, it should not be used in the reasoning paragraphs. Only opinion supporting reasons will be scored. So, when you said,
many reasons
, you are expected to present 2 reasons that support this claim.
As an under explained opinion presentation, it will be difficult to say that it will get a passing score. With a less than minimum word count as the opposing view paragraph will not be considered, plus other scoring deductions , this essay has insurmountable scoring problems. |
## **IELTS TASK 1****The chart shows the number of international students in the USA by subject and country**
*(I wrote only first chart so there is no information about subject)*
The chart illustrates the amount of international students in the USA and from where they came during the period of four years.
Overall, the amount of Indian students is the highest whereas the amount of students from Mexico, Turkey and Thailand and Indonesia is the lowest and have not experienced any changes.
In 2000 USA saw large increase in the amount of students from India whidh overtook both Korean and Chinese students reaching 80.000 from 40.000 in four years. The figure for students from Japan and Taiwan declined with 10.000 less students in the end for both countries respectively.
Other counties including Thailand, Mexico, Turkey and Indonesia stayed the same with the exception of students from Korea where it saw tangible rise from 40.000 to 52.000 approximately.
* | This report cannot be properly reviewed. There are several reasons for this:
- Insufficient word count at 127 out of 150
- Improper report format. Ther comparison of charts are required for the presentation. The student cannot do a selective presentation. That is an automatic failing grade.
- Improper summary presentation
Basically. the writers because he opted not to follow the report presentation instructions has proven an inability to adhere to academic requirements. A major reason to fail the test. The foreign students in the UK and other English speaking countries are expected to follow directions as provided. Failure to do so in the language test means the student does not have the qualities they are looking for in potential students. |
**Question:**
## Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
***Television advertising directed toward young children (aged two to five) should not be allowed. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.***
Most people believes that children should be given to free access,on their own will . Nevertheless I believe that television advertisement should be restricted and I have my own reasons for such notion.
Firstly,young ones are very sensitive towards outer sphere.They can be easily influenced by their surroundings and in other hand,television advertisement provides appealing feature to the viewers despite the fact that ,many contents of them were not justified.Young children may imagine the fantasy of pictorial world into their real life .Let's take an example for further clarification.Children who saw ghost to killing the people may had severe mental impact in the brain of children.The fear of death can be deeply embedded in their mind,which is difficult to take it off even in their later life.
Another reason for the restriction of the advertisement is due to the curiosity of the children.Every kids are very eager to know to every details in their early age and sometimes they even try by themselves which is more dangerous.For instance,children may learn improper language shown in the advertisement which is quite embrassing even for the parents.Recent findings of University of California has proved that ,many children learn around 60% of the words they spell from outer world than from family.Among of them,15% of the information they retrieved is from the television and 5% is from advertisement.
There are many programs which recommend the parental guidance for the viewers to subside it's consequences to some extent. However,every parents are unable to look their children due to their busy schedule and some even ,allow to look such ad videos to get distracted from child as they are exhausted by naggy behavious of children. If the media authority do not censor the content and unable to discern the fact that,contents were generally for entertainment purposes than applying in real life,it will have haphazard impacts .Some researchers even claim that,excessive exposure of television to the children have two major results.One is ,it enable to visualise what television depicted .Another factor is very prime ,as it further states that early exposure of advertisement may lead towards the short term pleasure seeking activating the serotonin hormone in a faster rate .Consequently,it lasted for a longer time than we normally anticipates .
Concluding,above argument must hold water as the reasons for restriction for the television advertisement is enough. | The writer provided a confusing paraphrase of the original topic. The paraphrase does not refer to advertising or the age range as the topic. The reader will be left confused and wondering about the personal opinion presented. This is a failing paraphrase as it leaves the reader stressed about the discussion focus.
The writer does not have visible control over sentence structuring and word usage. The discussions are presented in a transliterated manner or a word for word translation of a vernacular sentence. This lack of proper English vocabulary and grammar skills negatively affected the Task Accuracy and C + c presentation of the discussion. There is no way this essay will geta passing mack.
The student must focus on vocabulary building and simple sentence development excercises for the time being. He should not try to write essays at the moment. He is incapable of writing coherently at this time. |
**Topic:
*In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in.***
## What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?
My writing
In several nations in the world, as people move around the countries as work's demand, people increasingly feel interested in discovering the history of the building or a house where they live.
Nowadays, people tend to find more information about where they live because of some reason. For example, it might have a historical value that they want to understand more and feel proud of where they live. In Vietnam, some houses that used to be a base for the military's secret meetings in the war in 1954 and the tools, furniture, antiques are still kept until today in order to display for guests who feel interested in discovering. By contrast, people find information about the buildings or the apartments might be because of safety reasons or in rare cases because of spiritual belief. For instance, in America, there are some houses that used to have a crime like suicide or even worse like murder, people tend to feel scared and afraid to move in as they want to avoid any supernatural events that might occur in their houses in the near future. Another reason might be because of safety reasons such as the facilities in the old building like the pumps, the fire staircases, or fire alarm system.
People who feel interested in discovering the history of the house can find information from several trustworthy sources. For example, they can look for the data from the real estate agencies which provide them the information about when did the houses were built, how many owners it has, or even how many times that the houses were rent or bought. Especially in America, there is a famous agency name Zillow, this one is providing this kind of information for all their clients. In addition, the internet is the easiest source to access for any kind of information or easier that they can just talk to their neighbors.
To conclude, there are several reasons that people want to find data about where they live, it might be because of safety reasons or avoid the buildings which have a lot of rumors about the supernatural events. People can look for information on the internet, their neighbors, and real estate agencies, or even the community libraries. | The prompt restatement has deviated from the original topic, eason for the topic, and opinion statement. It has not properly related to the paraphrasing requirements and response format expectations. The essay has begun as a failing presentation in terms of task requirements. It will be difficult to achieve a passing score at this point.
Nowadays, people tend to find more information about where they live because of some reason.
Avoid constantly repeating the discussion topic. It should only be stated twice. Once in the paraphrase then again in the concluding summary.
in order to display for guests
Wrong discussion point. The essay speaks of a residence or place where people actually live ) not historic sites or museums. The writer has problems understanding the target topic. A clear failure of English comprehension skills. The essay will recieve an overall failing score due to this. |
*Please help me better my writing by giving your feedbacks on my structure, grammar, vocabulary and idea. I will really appreciate it. Thank for reading!*
***Some people say that the main environmentalproblem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say there are more important environmental problems.
## Discuss both theses views and give your own opinion.
Write at least 250 words***
Over the last several decades, human society has been experienced the most rapid development ever with the powerful hand of scientific and technological advancement. In spite of making people's life much more convenient and enjoyable, this, more dangerously, causes serious harm to our environmental health.
Some people think that the main problem we are facing now is the loss of wide range of animals and plants, which is obviously explainable: the more the society grows, the more resources we need to satisfy our increasing demands. The global population has reached around 9 billion which is much more than that of the last century. As there are more people, we expand our territory further for both living and exploiting natural resources. As a result, the land we are using briskly overlap that of fauna and flora, which cause natural vegetation to disappear and all animals living in it to have no place to hide. If this continues to happen, those plants and animals may stand in the brink of extintion and in fact, many of them are.
In addition, there are also numerous other environmental issues we need to be aware of such as plastic waste or air pollution, etc. The single-use consumerism is quickly becoming prevailing in the present time while people use a lot of disposable cups, straws, boxes for just one time, which day by day piles up in our ocean poisoning marine species. Furthermore, the birth of new affordable bikes, cars and other means of transportation put more of them on the road, which emits tons of released gas every year. Undoutedly, the air we are breathing is contanminated in a blink of an eye.
In my point of view, there are lots of environmental problems including those above need to be concerned by both governments and public so that we can join hands and protect our living habitat, keep it safe and clean for our descendants. | The first paragraph should be composed of the prompt restatement and personal opinion. The writer does not present a proper paraphrasing of the 2 public opinions.In fact, the statement is not related to the 2 original topics at all. Neither does the writer provide an appropriate personal opinion as a response to the "give your own opinion" portion of the discussion instruction. The presentation has failed half the test at this point.
Providing an explanation of the 2 public opinions is a must in this essay. The writer did not accomplish that writing instruction. The overall discussion approach is one that the writer created for himself. It does not adhere to the given discussion requirements. It cannot pass due to the obvious disregard for writing instructions. Is this evidence ofa lack of English comprehension skills in reference to the original instructions? It appears so. Will that be the cause of a failed score? Yes. |
## AIR POLLUTION
*- protect the **environment** - write about air pollution and how to deal with it.*
***Air pollution** is a serious problem, and it also is a common essay topic. I wrote about it and hope you'll help me with my essay. THANK YOU!*
This is my work:
In the recent years, we have to face up to a serious problem: air pollution, which is predicted out of control in the future. It directly affects our lives. Air pollution occurs when the atmosphere contains gases, dust or fumes in harmful amount.
The pollution isn't natural, how it appeared? There are some causes. First, factories dump untreated heat, smog and sewage, waste into environment. Second, vehicles make exhaust and dust. Third, consumer and commercial products make landfills from its waste. Fourth, people burn trash and fossil fuel, it produces carbon dioxide. Finally, in agriculture, chemical substances (pesticide and herbicide), fire smoke and pollen can also be pollutants.
We are living in a big air tank. If the air is polluted, of course people are affected. Air pollution harm our respiratory systems, it leads to pneumonia, bronchitis, lung cancer or even the death. It changes the ecosystem, kills animals and botanical species. Air pollution contaminates water and soil, cause global warming and natural disaster.
We call for some solutions. Factories and transport must have exhaust treatment system. If people use electric public transport, cycle or walk, there'll be less poisonous fume. We ought to use environmentally-friendly products and renewable fuel, follow the 3Rs (reduce, reuse, recycle) and put out all the fire. We shouldn't use fireplace or wood stove for heating and cooking. And the most important action is plant more trees - our nature lungs.
Protect the environment is our crucial responsibility. It needs our hands. If each one of us, the small parts prevent air pollution from happening together, there'll be huge effects. | The first thing I noticed is how you are prone to using contractions, which is an informal method of writing. When writing an academic paper, use both words, spell it out because that is how academic tones are maintained. Follow the formal method of writing as academic papers are used in school presentations while word contractions are used mostly in informal, casual, and creative writing papers.
When writing a paper based on current or ongoing actions, use active descriptive word references ( protect = protecting). Thought clarity is also important. What did you mean when you wrote:
It needs our hands.
Are you sure that you did not mean : *"It is in OUR hands "* ? Your sentence does not offer a clear idea of what you wish to say. |
Hello, please kindly help me review my essay, thank you a lot for your help.
**Topic:
*Some people believe that everyone has a right to have access to university education and that governments should make it free for all students no matter what financial background they have.*
## To what extend do you agree or disagree?**
Some people argue that college must be debt-free, irrespective of learners' financial status as everyone are worthy to be given their dues. Personally, I definitely disagree with this point of view owing to its adverse outcomes.
It is understandable that there are individuals who subscribe to the free-college policy as many students cannot complete their schooling due to their low social-economic backgrounds. These advocates believe that free-of-charge education would lead to more educated people, which contributes to the development of the country and society. This is a flawed idea since it can raise the youth unemployment rate as well as the number of people with degrees who will do jobs that they are overqualified for.
Another drawback of eliminating tuition fees is that students will take their college education for granted because they will not have to pay anything. These days, undergraduates have to pay for courses, which means that unless they want to spend another significant amount of money and time to re-attend those classes, they are forced to try their best to get good grades. In contrast, learners who receive the provision of free-of-charge education could be indifferent to their study if they have to pay nothing. For instance, they will easily cut classes or not bother to study hard since it costs them nothing. Hence, it leads to a waste of the national budget which is devoted to pursuing college without a fee.
In conclusion, I believe that education, in general, and college, in particular, should not be free for every individuals since the drawbacks are hard to overcome.
*(262 words)* | This is a flawed idea
Good job. This is exactly how this topic should be discussed based on the given parameters. This a good written debate presentation. However, your point of view discussion could be made longer and stronger in opposition. still, a good effort. It delivered.
Hence
This in the better developed opposition discussion. Try to replicate this style in your future exercises using similar single opinion discussions. You are on the right track.
In conclusion
This is the weak point in the discussion. This should have at least 40 words and a 2 sentence summary of the previous discussion. This is the section that will recieve a score down in the overall consideration. You need a reverse paraphrase here. |
## Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time
Nowadays, charity work is more popular day by day and is especially special to young people. This brings large benefits for them and resolves some issues for society. In my point of view, I totally agree that teenagers should spend their spare time on unpaid community work statements. This essay will explain the reason why I support that.
According to many people, community work is an opportunity for teenagers to become complete people in their life. In other words, the work like helping old people, special kids, etc. the little-adults can increase more social experience. This includes how to understand the problem, how to gain the idea to solve that issue, and how to take the action. For instance, many universities in Vietnam organized lots of charity events such as The Green Summer, The Spring volunteer,... Joining this program will increase our conscience about other people, and furthermore, it gives us a chance to take humanitarian action. Significantly, this experience and social skills can not be learned at school or by attending an academic course.
Like the previous point, it is a good chance for society. Firstly, the increase of decent citizens amounts also reduces the proportion of crimes for countries. As evidence that through helping people works, young generations also advance their cognitive skills and have responsibility for themselves and society. Accordingly, the number of crimes, robberies, and unethical involvements was reduced in recent years.
In conclusion, participating in unpaid work has positive effects on society. Similarly, it brings rich inner qualities to teenagers. | This essay will explain the reason why I support that.
This is unacceptable. Once your opinion is provided, the reasoning summary must follow immediately to complete the opinion basis/ discussion reasons outline.
volunteer,...
One punctuation mark at a time. Review punctuation usage rules. Nowhere does it allow for the successive use of punctuation marks. That is because each mark indicates a different though t or emotional representation. That is why it is used only one at a time. This relates to thought and discussion clarity.
can not
Spelling error. This should be represented as one word only. Connect the spelled out words as one only.
Firstly
Do not use numerical ordinals in a paragraph if it cannot be used successively.
Use a comprehensive concluding summary. Use at least 40 words for a full scoring award. |
HELLO, here's my writing, please check for me, thanks a lot.
## IELTS WRITING TASK 2- CAUSE AND SOLUTION
TOPIC: People who live in large cities face a range of problems in their daily life. What are the main problems people in cities face, and how can these problems be tackled? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.
It is believed that large cities are usually economic hubs of the country. Therefore, many people from different cities move to large cities to look for job opportunities. Besides that, people in cities face numerous problems such as pollution, population, and traffic. This essay will analyse some of the problems, and possible solutions.
One of the most common problems in large cities is traffic congestion. Due to the increase in vehicle density, the rush hours have become a nightmare for many citizens. For example, in Hanoi from 5-7pm, it takes 2-3 hours to travel from their offices to homes in a short distance. Furthermore, overcrowding is the second major problem that may spread infectious disease. For example: In Covid pandemic, a dense population has increased the risk of spread of infectious disease such as in Hanoi and HCM have the highest infectious cases in our country.
For the problems that people are facing above, there are some possible solutions for these cases. Firstly, with the traffic problems, the government should encourage citizens to use more public transport such as: improve the quality and the numbers of public transports as same as many developed countries. Secondly, the government should improve the quality of education and offer the citizens more job opportunities in small cities. Therefore, people don't need to migrate to large cities. These solutions can reduce problems for the large cities now.
In conclusion, it is known that people who live in big cities have to face traffic jams and infection. In my opinion, If the states encourage people using public transportation and offer a wide range of job opportunities, the amount of emigrants will decrease in the near future | This essay will analyse some of the problems, and possible solutions
You already provided an overview of the problems. Provide a summary of solutions next to complete the response requirements Never repeat the discussion instructions. You are to provide a summarized opinion where direct questions are asked.
In Covid pandemic
Incorrect wording. It should have been: During the... This is related to LR and GRA skills.
The writer has done an excellent job of discussing the causes and solutions. The sentences are coherent and well connected. However, better use of transition sentences would work better. Cohesive paragraphs also exist in the presentation regardless off the menemal GRA issues. The essay is well developed and fully addresses the discussion paragraph requirements. continue to develop your writing skills to further polish your written presentation. |
**Question:**
*Some people think that newspapers are the best way to learn news. However, others believe that they can learn news better through other media.*
## discuss both views and give your opinion
**Answer**
Opinions are widely divided on the importance of different news sources. Regarding whether newspapers are the most effective way to fulfill our curiosity about what is going on beside other media, there is a strong case to be made for both sides of the debate.
On the one hand, supporters of newspapers often highlight that articles provided by local journalists are trustworthy sources of news. They, for example, claim that a person can easily get the fake news in other media because they can be posted by anyone, without any regulations while newspapers are usually written by professional writers and are thoroughly checked and edited before being published. Furthermore, magazines, newspapers have existed for a long period of time and many publications have gained their trust from a wide range of readers, who have built a habit of reading a newspaper every day, so it is their priority to keep the reputation and by then, newspapers are getting better and better through time. Lastly, the argument continues, reading newspapers can also be a good way of reducing potential eye problems as people do not have to stare at the screen for a long time.
On the other hand, advocates of getting news from other sources often argue that newspapers cannot always be instantly fast when delivering news as they need a longer process to check and publish while sources like social networking are faster due to the fact that anyone can take part in posting news. Moreover, those who support the idea of getting news online also point to the invaluable benefit of how portable and easy it is to access the latest stories. With the development of technology, readers can now comfortably enrich their knowledge just by a few clicks. Finally, on this side of the debate, people emphasize that videos and audios are other useful attachments that only appear in online magazines, which I am sure, are very effective in delivering information.
Overall, it appears that the stronger argument is in favor of getting news from other sources, with all the advantages of the convenience and instant they have. However, this should be under the supervision of the government as online publishers can always deliver sensational news to the readers. | Well, of course there are strong sides to the debate. So, what is your opinion? Which is your personal preference ? Why? The thesis statement is incomplete as you failed to provide your opinion statement as required. Points will be lost because of this shortcoming. Always double check the requirements against your presentation. Adjust accordingly.
Lastly, the argument continues,
This is unnecessary. It disconnects from the earlier discussions. The paragraph lost its cohesive presentation due to the under-explained 3rd reason.
Finally, on this side of the debate
You don't have to go overboard with the number of reasons. 2 will suffice. Adding a 3rd often results in a little developed last reason. You did that twice and will be scored down in the process.
Good job in explaining the public opinions. You lost a chance at a higher scare though due to the aforementioned reasons and, a lack of personal opinion presentation. |
## formal education for kids as soon as possible
Some people say that at the very early age, children should take up formal education, while others think that not until 7 years old should they begin it. Personally, I believe having a sooner start will brings more beneficial than a later one.
To begin with, there are some advantages of letting the children go to school at at least 7 years old. Firstly, they will have more time at home learning how to behave and how to take care of themselves since the teachers cannot teach them that thing as detailed and carefully as their parents. Besides, taking up formal education too soon will create many stresses for the children. The earlier childhood prioritize learning skills instead of knowledge. For example, children prefer playing with their friends, living nonchalantly than doing math and writing several paragraphs.
However, begin their formal education at the very early age affects the kid more. Despite learning new things by theory with their parents, they can learn a lot by interacting with their friends or teachers and develop the social skill, which will benefit them in the long run. Although coming to school early may create stress, early knowledge and more time practicing will provide them a head start compared to the ones who start later, moreover, we can still manage their concern by adjusting the curriculum to be suitable for them. Having early education will help the children to develop more in the future.
In conclusion, I think that let the children take up formal education as soon as possible is a better idea. | The point of view of the writer is well represented throughout the essay. Only that point of view. There are 2 other points of view that should have been discussed from a public perception. This type of essay requires I reasoning paragraphs that offer 2 points:
- An analysis of the validity of the public reason
- The opinion of the writer in relation to the public support (Yes or no? Why?)
By framing the discussion in this manner the writer will be able to deliver:
- A thorough insight of the opinion
- A coherent discussion as per the discussion requirements
- 2 cohesive discussion paragraphs
The uniter will do well to review the required discussion presentation next time then consider the appropriate writing format. |
## pros and cons of advertising
nowadays, the soaring of the advertising industry is becoming more ubiquitous. From my standpoint this both HAS advantages and disadvantages.
Advertisement sometimes is really annoying. When we traipsing around the town, we can't avoid those adverts, because they are omnipresent, especially while we using our phone or any social media platform. The appearance frequency of advertisements distracting and baffling our concentration a lot. Another reason is the promotion of advert induce people to squander their money for many goods they dont really need. With the eye-catching facade background, effect and color, advertisements advertisement captivate numerous customers to buy things, which are not necessary. It leads clients to squander a large amount of money, which they can spare for their preliminary.
nonetheless, the advert promotion does have several benefits. The advertorial tool really plays an imperative role in the call to action, which helps many circumstances. For example, a large amount of money has been sent to many charities and organizations to save a plethora of refugees and animals that are on the verge of existence. Furthermore, a great number of jobs are always available thanks to the advertisement industry. It has created a lot of jobs for many people and solves their unemployment problem.
In conclusion, advertising itself has many pros and cons. I believe the attempt to refine those shortcomings during the raising this credential industry will be much more helpful for the society | In any real time setting, the writer is allowed to have his oven opinion that is not based on a discussion question. That is not the case for a task 2 essay. Regardless of how much you emphasize your dual opinion, it will not alter the actreal opinion requirement. This is a single opinion essay pick one side to develop as your response and do so. Discussion instruction changes made by the student will result in a failed test. Partial scores will be given because the response format remains incorrect. So, regardless of emphasis, when the writer shows an inability to follow the writing instructions, the score will not be passing. |
**Topic:**
***Some people say cultural traditions are destroyed when they are used as money-making attractions aimed at tourists.
Others say this is the only way to save such traditions.***
## Discuss both views and give your opinion.
**Answer:**
For thousands of years, cultural traditions have been preserved from the time of founding and defending the country until our developing era. However, conservation of these traditions is controversial whether it is true when using national cultural traditions as a money-making tourist attraction. Some people hold the opinion that it is unethical and this destroys Vietnamese traditions while others believe traditions can be saved by doing this. Both views will be discussed and my perspective will be proposed later.
With the aim of making money by turning traditions into famous destinations, some people disapprove because it can damage these Vietnamese cultural traditions. As soon as it becomes a famous tourist attraction, a huge number of tourists can pay a visit to these places and it can be a disaster if there are many people lacking awareness who throw their rubbish everywhere they go. As a result, the destination will not retain its beauty as the first time people can see as well as its original sanctity.
However, it is more convincing to believe that this development is the only method to conserve these traditions. Firstly, making Vietnamese cultures commercial could be the ideal way to deliver those to the community so that people can enhance their awareness and knowledge about the long-lasting history of Vietnam. Cultural traditions will be passed down from the older generation to the younger generation, that is the full meaning of conservation. Furthermore, this can help cultures of Vietnam to be acknowledged by different countries in the world, which increase the rank of Vietnam in the global tourism map.
In conclusion, although there is still little struggle in the ways of cultural tradition conservation, turning them into tourist attractions can be the best way to preserve Vietnamese cultures and pass down to the younger generation. | Vietnamese
Why did you center on vietnam? That is not the focus of the essay. The discussion focus has changed. This inaccuracy will result in a scoring deduction.
my perspective will be proposed
Give your opinion at once since you are implying the 5 paragraph discussion forumat rather than the 4 paragraph, per public . consideration (a personal opinion for each reason).
Vietnamese cultural traditions
Another incorrect topic reference, another deduction applied. Use a general country reference next time.
making Vietnamese cultures
You have a completely wrong understanding of the original topic as provided.
All task 2 essays do.not have a particular country focus. General discussions should use reasons applicable to any country. You may use your country as a stated example but, it should not be the discussion target. |
## Should government regulate the fast food industries in the same way that regulate the drug, alcohol
Many people claim that the government should regulate the fast food industries in the same way that regulates the drug, alcohol, tobacco industries. I agree with this idea. It's not only harmful to our health but also does not ensure hygiene.
Fast food is harmful to our health, especially our children. Firstly, the components of them have too much oil, favor, and addictives in, which easily make diseases. It can lead to obesity, high-pressure blood, or serious cancer. Secondly, it doesn't have enough nutrition for our body to develop. We are likely to lack nutrition; Moreover, in its ingredients, there have materials that make addiction. We are so uneasy to hold back our appetite. For instance, in 1980 in England, there had a girl who just ate potatoes for life. She ate about 73kg of potatoes at an average rate daily. As the result, she is obese now. Her weight reached 170kg when she was 21 years old. She can't be able to stand up or going around. For this reason, we have to ban the industry's activities.
Moreover, we don't know exactly that fast food is clear or not. These food are made by some companies which maybe don't have any permit. Also, we do not know if the ingredients of this food are unfresh. Do we know if the worker doesn't take the gloves or wash their hands before working? As I remembered, I saw a worm in a bread I had just bought in the lovely morning in the past. It's so disgusting.
In conclusion, I think the government should prohibit the business actives of the fast-food industry. It is not suitable for eating at any time of the day. | I agree with this idea.
Seeing as there was no specific Agree or disagree response choice for this direct . statement, you could have varied the response by using a Yes or No response instead. The yes or no option appears to be more applicable in this case since there is only one - for you to comment on. Varying the actual response will help you show a wider response format style as well. buch an ansever is also more attuned to your response thesis.
For instance, in 1980
Use a more recent sample since fast food items are already somewhat regulated by the FDA and Department of health in every country. The age of the information, being over 41 years old makes it appear researched. The example provided also does not contain a connection to fast food preparation in the 21st century. You are using early 20th century data instead.
is clear
What needs to be clear about fastfood.It has to be CLEAN. A word choice error and it's subsequent improper use in the sentence occurred.
The writer understood the topic and delivered a mostly cohesive and coherent discussion. However, there are still vocabulary and reference errors that will lower the score. |
**The plan below shows the site of an airport now and how it will look after redevelopment next year.
*Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.***
Given is the map illustrating some changes will occur in Southwest Airport in the near future.
Overall, two main modifications will be made to the airport. These involve the erections of new amenities and the modernization in the transportation system.
In the present there is only one door for each in the arrivals and the departures, but this number is likely to increase twofold in the following year. In the north of the airport, the boarding hall is going to be enlarged with the addition of 10 gates as well as being converted from a rectangular layout to an Y-shaped one. The walkway is also planned to be replaced by a sky train to optimize passenger's time to arrive at their gates.
The security and the customs remain unchanged, however, the check-in to the left of the departures will be replaced to the opposite site in order to make room for a bag drop and the relocation of the café. In addition, a new shop will be built next year, but only for the security area. There are also the constructions of an ATM, a cafe and a car hire which will be accompanied with a minor expansion in the southeast of the airport.
Thanks for your advice !
* | There needs to be an expanded use of punctuation marks to add clarity to the paragraphs. A properly placed comma here, a period there. Proper punctuation placement will help increase the score of this essay in at least 3 related sections.
The summary overview could have been better presented over 3 sentences in a single paragraph. There isn't enough information to warrant the seperation of the trending sentence from the overview. neither should the comparison report be spread out over 4 paragraphs. Stand -alone sentences are not useful in C + C scoring. This is only used in class to help the student learn what each sentence should represent. In actual writing the overiaw should be a combined data reference. |
Question:
***The government should control the amount of violence in films and televisions in order to decrease the violent crimes in the society.***
## To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Essay: It is indisputable that the increasing crime rates are related to brutal scenes on screen and people believe that the government has responsibility for the decline in the appearance of these scenes. From my point of view, I completely agree with this statement.
Firstly, it is undeniable that violence is an essential part of action or thriller movies, but for a long, they have had bad impacts on people, especially on children. Since bloody scenes can stimulate human brains and create a sense of excitement, children have been dragged along with those feelings and would try to imitate the characters on screen. As children do not have enough awareness of what should or should not do, they tend to accept violence as a way to deal with their problems. Therefore, there have been many incidents of school violence and the juvenile delinquency rate is increasing.
Furthermore, although adults are better than children at self-awareness and self-control, brutality on media can also have bad effects on their minds. In fact, long-term exposure to cruel scenes can erode adults' consciousness and autonomy. Thus, they take violence for granted and have a tendency to commit a crime. For instance, in the USA, a man opened fire on a crowd as he was trying to act like Bane, the villain of The Dark Knight Rise, at a movie premiere.
In conclusion, controlling brutality in films and televisions is a must, and the government should take responsibility to strictly supervise it. Because violent scenes on media have bad impacts on children and they can stimulate adults to commit an offense. | Try not to exaggerate your paraphrasing of the original topic. Do not alter the orginal reference point. This is a discussion of a public opinion rather than a debate about an indisputable fact. There is no reference to an indisputable fact in the original so you will already lose points for altering the original topic basis. Use a less inflammatory tone. This is an academic written discussion that should use an even academic tone throughout. No flaming is necessary.
I completely agree
Next time include one or 2 sentences referring to the reason/s why you believe so. The basis of your , is part of the scored introduction.
but for a long
A long what? This is an English reference to a period of coverage st, the word you are looking for is time. Without the time reference, the phrase is incomplete.
Because
Academic writing rules do not allow the use of a connecting word at the start of a sentence. |
## Advertisements are becoming more and more common in everyday life. Is it positive or negative?
It is argued that advertising is becoming more popular in our daily life. While I accept that this has both benefits and drawbacks, I would argue that there are more disadvantages than advantages.
On the one hand, advertisement has some benefits. Chief amongst them is that it can provide information to customers about products and services. Therefore, customers can make better shopping choices. Take an example, people watch TV commercials about different brands of shampoo products and they can choose the one that works best for them. Furthermore, advertising can raise people's awareness and knowledge about product development. It can be seen that advertisements help people discover more about technical devices. For instance, kids know a lot about technical devices because they watch many adverts about digital gadgets on television.
On the other hand, I strongly believe that there are great drawbacks which outweigh these benefits. The primary reason for this view is that an organization has to spend a huge amount of money on advertising. As a result, this lead to an increase in the cost of their products and services. For example, Vinamilk takes billion Vietnam dong to promote their new milk product. Another factor is that advertising encourages people to buy things that they do not really need. Apple's marketing and advertising campaigns, for instance, have a huge influence on the spending habits of the young generation. As a result, many the young are long to own the latest version of the iPhone even though their old still are perfectly adequate for their needs.
In conclusion, although there are some positive effects of advertisements, it seems to me that it is more disadvantages to using adverts. | Consider the original response wording and use it precisely in your opinion statement. Your current response has delivered an incorrect format as it is a totally different prompt response. It will get a failing consideration in terms of the prompt restatement + personal opinion consideration. This is a positive or negative result consideration essay. It is melt the same as an advantage or disadvantage opinion. The discussion considerations of the 2 are highly different.
Having had the total presentation, it is clear that the writer has misunderstood the discussion presentation and how to present its related response. The overall essay cannot pass since it failed to present the expected and expected response. The writer must work on strengthening his English comprehension skills and additionally, familiarize himself with the various task 2 response formats. |
## MENTAL AND PHYSICAL STRENGTH - WHICH IS MORE IMPORTANT IN SPORTS?
**Some people claim that mental strength is more important for success in sports. Others believe that it is more important for sportspeople to be strong and fit. Discuss both views and give your opinion.**
It is sometimes argued that preparing mental toughness is superior to physical strength. There could be several reasons why this is the case, and I believe that it is necessary to have a strong body and health due to its huge impact on the improvement of success rate.
Granted, one might argue that mental strength would be necessary if sports participants want to win the competition. According to this theory, it is proven by psychologists that participants with weaker health can still win the competition if they have well-made strategies, such as analysing the weakness of rivals or finding out smart ways to win the match without using too much strength. This is also predicated on the assumption that the mentality of sportsmen plays a vital role when practicing. For instance, people who have a fear of water can hardly join swimming even though they have excellent physical health. By observing thoroughly and preparing a stable mind, lacking mentality is not a problem for sportsmen.
Having said that, this line of reasoning is not sound since great strength of mind is not enough for participants to win others. Since in sports such as basketball or football, players have to meet high standards such as over 180 centimeters height or having no health problems. To take the World Cup for example, it can be witnessed that there were no Asian teams being able to win the first prize, because footballers in these areas are generally shorter and weaker than European ones. Although it is true that having a stable mentality can increase the success rate for competitors, players can still be low-spirited when they actually meet rivals with huge differences in physical fitness. By contrast, competitors who have better strength are more confident, which results in a great mental and physical condition.
To conclude, a well-prepared strength and fitness in a sports competition is irreplaceable since it prevents huge differences in sportsmen, which leads to greater mental condition and more opportunities to win the match. (334 words) | is superior to physical strength
In what instance? The restatement is incomplete not having referred to the subject of the discussion which is sports. The topic introduction lacked substance in relation to the reasons provided since there was no central topic provided.
Okay. Here is the main problem with your presentation. You are using a personal opinion for both reasons in each paragraph. The preferred format is to have the writer consider the public opinion first. Present 2 sentences representing the public, then use a transition sentence to connect these to your 2 sentence personal opinion. Yes, this is a comparative discussion presentation. Do not convert it to a personal opinion presentation alone. Use proper pronouns for differentiation and grammar accuracy. Consider why the public supports each opinion then agree or disagree with it. |
## **Nowadays university education is considered very important for people's future.**
*However, there are a lot of successful people who didn't get higher education.
Do you think that higher education is necessary to succeed in life? Justify your opinion with relevant examples.*
It is true that these days, having an academic scope from the institution is significant for people. Although a number of people become successful in their lives, without owning a professional degree, I believe that educational qualification can help people to unlock better opportunities in life. However, there are also some other factors that one needs to be aware of in order to reach their life goals.
To begin with, academic training provides some sort of skills which are vital for the working environment. Indeed, when people study at university, some skills such as communication, leadership, interpersonal, teamwork, analytics...can be strengthened. For instance, many individuals are weak at communication, which makes it difficult for them to express themselves clearly, going to an institution allows them to have opportunities to improve this by doing presentation and teamwork exercises, which they barely did at high school. Consequently, university education is beneficial in terms of providing essential skills to be successful in life.
On the other hand, the educational scope does not necessary, if an individual can manage to learn it through working experience. In other words, lessons taught at the institution are compiled by top experts in their industry so there are also other available places to learn such as companies, weekly workshops, online speeches...For example, if an individual wants to learn about Digital Marketing, he or she can find many resources online to study or apply to work in a Digital Marketing Agency to learn from other colleagues and their boss. With continuous effort, one can surely succeed in life just by keeping learning every day.
In conclusion, it seems to me that higher education has many pros, but it is not the only way that helps people to achieve their life goals. | academic scope
What exactly do you mean by this? I believeit is a word choice error as this references an area of learning rather than a university degree. just because the combination of words sounds fancy and advanced, does not mean it is applicable to the discussion. Check the word or phrase reference before using it. Make sure it applies to the discussion. Errors like there can lower the score.
However, there are also some other factors that one needs to be aware of in order to reach their life goals.
Prompt deviation. your reference and discussion should only focus on
I believe that educational qualification can help people to unlock better opportunities in life
based on the question
Do you think that higher education is necessary to succeed in life?
. Your additional. unrelated response will lower the restatement score. Any and all references to this topic will not earn score credits and will instead, be deducted from your word count, resulting in a failing score. |
*MANY PEOPLE LEAVE THEIR HOME COUNTRY AND GO TO OTHER COUNTRIES TO LIVE AND WORK. WHY DO YOU THINK IT IS HAPPENING?*
## DO THE ADVANTAGES OF THIS TREND OUTWEIGH ITS DISADVANTAGES?
*My essay:***The prompt: Many people leave their home country and go to other countries to live and work.**
There is indeed a considerable number of people choosing to go to foreign nations to make a living and settle in these places. There could be several reasons for this, and I consider it to be more benefits than drawbacks.
Nowadays, some people would like to have personal developing opportunities in their career but in some cases, in their native land, they can not seek out any chance for this because maybe their jobs or majors are not popular in their country. For example, in some countries, artificial intelligence is an aspect that is not enough common so that all the people who pay more attention to it can approach and find jobs. Hence, they have to move to other countries where they are enabled to study and work in this sector.
In my view, this trend brings about many upsides rather than downsides. As I mentioned before, people who live and work abroad might find good jobs that are suitable for their interests and ability, so they might also be capable of earning a high salary and make their life better. On another side, it can be difficult for some people because they might feel out of water when living overseas alone, they also have to face many problems such as strange culture, communicative barrier. However, they can solve these things by learning the language and making more friends o improve their knowledge about the culture and inhabitants in this country.
In conclusion, some individuals who go away from their home country result from the challenge of finding jobs in society, and I believe that this trend is desirable.
Thanks for your help! | When asked "Why do you think this is so?" that is the opening for the thesis statement presentation. It means, a precise and direct reason for the occurrence must be presented as a part of the opinion statement. It cannot be responded to vaguely by giving a non descriptive response. When asked for reasons or a reason, provide one. This will tell the examiner that you understand the topic and what the discussionr requirements are. The current presentation is only partially responsive in terms of response format and answer requirements. This is a 3 sentence presentation.
Sentence 1: Topic
Sentence 2: Response to the first question
Sentence 3: Response to the second question
The reason paragraph is good. It is not grammatically perfect but, it allows a clear understanding of the thoughts of the writer just the same. It works because the logic within the presentation is focused on a single topic. It covers all the required elements of the paragraph presentation. However, the same cannot be said for the second reasoning paragraph.
Do not use a compare and contrast presentation because this is a single opinion essay. Both reasons you present should prove that disadvantages are actual advantages. It should not indicate a confusing presentation that blurs your actual opinion when compared to your restatement paragraph. |
## Some people believe that hobbies need to be difficult to be enjoyable
Hobbies are believed to be hard so that they can be enjoyable. In my viewpoint, I'm not in agreement with this idea.
The first reason is that people have a variety of interests which depend on their personalities. Some get used to a hectic lifestyle and therefore they have considerable demands for demanding and challenging experiences. The harder the hobbies are, the more excited they feel. Meanwhile, others prefer a more easy and slow style of living which means that they want something predictable and not tough to achieve. So they have simple but not less fun hobbies. For example, I'm the second type and my hobby is reading books. Despite being straightforward, it broadens my horizon as well as gives me a sense of accomplishment when finishing a book. In contrast, my brother is the first type and has a passion for information technology. This requires a high level of knowledge and experience so he has to work really hard.
In addition to the above reason, difficult and easy hobbies are equally pleasurable for different reasons. The majority has a big effect on a person. one can be keen on an activity because it gains popularity while others cross it off their bucket list as their friends do. Moreover, those who are economical would rather take up free of charge leisures. some people even put an activity on their bucket list to be the same as their idols. Case in point, music is not one's cup of tea but when he becomes a fan of a singer, he will find songs more interesting and maybe try to be a singer, regardless of challenges.
In conclusion, I disagree with the idea that hobbies give more sense of satisfaction when they are more difficult since they play a vital role in our life though tough or easy. | The prompt restatement is not altered enough in terms of keywords and thought reference fron the original. It needs to be changed a bit more in terms of sentence structure to be accepted as a paraphrased statement. The opinion sponte is partially correct only. This is a measured or degree response essay. Yes, it is based on an agree v disagree format. However, it requires an emotional representation of the writer's support of the opinion. The essay will recieve a partial TA score as the response format is still only partially correct in presentation format. The paragraph also fails to represent q complete paragraph. That should be presented within 3-5 sentences. 1-2 sentences is only a partial paragraph.
The conclusion should follow the same format. Seperate the sentences by idea or topic. One sentence each. |
***Foreign visitors should pay more than local visitors for cultural and historical attractions.***
## To what extent do you agree or disagree.
Charging overseas travelers higher than domestic tourists is advisable in some countries as it can be one way to raise the funding for preservation of ancient cultural architectures. I partly agree with this argument.
It is obvious that the more tourists visit the attractions, the more pressure the environment has to face. Littering is one of the main issues, which results from many overseas tourists' lack of awareness to put garbage in the right place. If monument management board do not have enough staff and expense to treat waste in time, it may cause air pollution and bad landscape. Therefore, raising fee for foreign travelers is one way to contribute to financial source to handle this problem. In addition, in some countries, the environmental and cultural value can not be neglected in the pursuit of economic value. For example, Bhutan will not be as famous as they are now with their environmental - friendly lifestyle and thousand -year - old architectures if they emphasize the tourism development.
However, to some extent, domestic and foreign tourists should be treated fairly. Inequaliry can cause peole travelling from other countries not to choose visiting these nations; thus, their GDP will decrease as in fact, overseas travelers contribute a larger amount through their spending on higher quality hotels and restaurants as well as their interests for souvenirs. Besides, unfair treatment experience can create negative impression on the host country, spoiling the nation's image in the eye of international friends. It directly leads to the reduction in the number of tourists; and concequently, the significan fall in the revenue of tourism industry.
To sum up, higher fee for travelers from other countries may benefit countries that want to focus on the preservation of their historical sites. However, they should build attractive travel policy to balance between protecting the environment and generating profit from tourism industry. | The first paragraph will recieve a failing preliminary GRA score due to improper sentence structure. The writer delivered a run - on sentence rather than a properly developed 3-5 individual idea/topic sentence paragraph. The presentation clearly shows an inability to control a written sentence format.
Inequaliry
Inequality. The writer failed to use the correct word due to either a lack of proper vocabulary knowledge or a failure to proofread. Either way, it is still a clear LR deduction.
The writer shows a clear understanding of the topic and how it should be discussed. However, his word usage and sentence structure flaws could cause him to recieve failing scores in the applicable sections. Strengthening the writer's skills will help him gain better scares in the said areas. |
## **In many countries schools have severe problems with student behavior.**
*What do you think are the causes of this?
What solutions can you suggest?*
It is evident that schools are currently suffering from a severe case of students' conduct disorder. The following essay discusses the underlying causes of this problem and proposes some potential solutions.
Firstly, let us take a look at two main causes of inappropriate behavior in students. One reason is that when a student hits puberty, he or she is more susceptible to peer pressure. Impressionable students in this phase tend to modify their behavior due to the actions of their peers, as they lack the ability to distinguish between right and wrong. This tendency also explains why the Internet's glorification of harmful content readily leads students into believing that some inappropriate activities such as aggression, sexual insult, or drug use are not at all serious and even enjoyable. The other key factor is the setting in which students grow up. Children with insufficient education from the very first stages of life are inclined to deviances. According to clinical psychologist Baumrind, parents who bring up their children in either a neglectful or disciplinarian way are more likely to have their children develop low self-esteem and engage in improper activities.
However, there are some suggestions of solutions that I can offer. Educational institutions should provide more activities addressing these behavioral problems, such as lessons on how to evaluate materials on the Internet. These activities should equip students with valuable knowledge and soft skills, allowing them to better understand how to handle a variety of situations as well as develop a stronger personal perspective. At the same time, an authoritative approach to educating children should be adopted by parents. Through this method, parents not only set rules and high expectations for their children but also try their best to be affectionate and supportive of them. As for society, every individual should feel the responsibility and take actions to limit the propagation of 'unhealthy' messages so as to prevent students from being negatively influenced. In the same fashion, social media influencers could produce high-quality content that encourages parents to show more consideration to their children.
In brief, students' behavioral problems are complex and necessitate a significant amount of effort. I hope that the public will pay greater attention to this hotly debated topic and work towards some positive changes.
thanks a lot ^^ | The following essay discusses the underlying causes of this problem and proposes some potential solutions.
Unacceptable. You were not being asked to repeat the guide qquestions. The requirement was to directly provide 2 causes and solutions responses. Outline the discussion topics. Provide thisis statements that will offer an insight into your English discussion skills. There are no opinion statements present. The format is only partially represented.
According to clinical psychologist Baumrind,
Do not use researched information. This data does not fall under public knowledge or personal experience and knowledge as suggested by the prompt. You will be unable to research during the actual test.
The truth is, the essay is very well presented but, this type of 300+ word presentation cannot be completed within the 40 minute time allowance. Practice writing in concise sentences. |
## businesses duty to provide social services to communities
This is an extremely practical opinion that most of citizens in their country cares about.In my opinion,I disagree with this idea of companies providing social services to communities,to improve life condition like social service such as playground,park,bus service,etc,...I really think this is about the local goverment policy not company's duty.Answering this,we do taxes,which we pay the goverment to improve our lives,not just police,not just roads but also our active life too like sports and social facilities as I said above.On the other hand,companies don't receive people's cash so clearly that they don't have the responsiblities to provide those services.Just to be clear,not saying that they can't help,in fact there are hundreds of companies help to build hospital,S.O.S houses,park,...Help is always needed for those who have bad condition.Considering that the goverment held the most important jobs:running a country,but indeed that as a powerful agency,they need to provide best place to live for the people.Furthermore,improving people's life condition will gain people's trust which needs for a goverment running a country.Companies in fact they do pay for taxes which also contributed to the govermant bank,they already take part in improving people's lives,so its obvious that they dont have duty to do that.In general,we all share the responsibilities to make our community a better place to live but mostly that's the responsiblilies of the goverment,not company | Please refrain from practice essays until you have become more familiar with the general paragraph format and specific opinion presentation typer for the task 2 essay. This needs to follow the standard 4 paragraph discussion composed of 4-5 sentences with a clearly outlined opinion presentation. The 5 paragraph optional presentation is sometimes used when asked to discuss both views and offer an opinion.There is also the word count minimum of 250 words for each essay, regardless of discussion type.
Based on the aforementioned explanation,I am sure you can understand why this essay cannot recieve a passing score. It has to be given a failing score due as it misses out on the required presentation requirements. |
***The pie charts below show units of electricity production by fuel source in France and Australia in 1980 and 2020.***
## Write a report describing the information and make comparisons when relevant.
The pie chart compare the number of electricity units provided by 5 types of fuel source in France and Australia in the years 1980 and 2000.
Overall, it can be seen that Australia relied on coal as a primary source of fuel in both years, while France had a balanced use of different fuels in 1980 only to depend heavily on nuclear power 20 years after. Both countries produced remarkably more units of electricity after the period.
In 1980, half of Australia's electricity came from coal, doubling France's figure. Natural gas and hydro power each produced 20 units of electricity, and oil accounted for a small number of 10 units. By 2000, total electricity production went up to 170 units, with a significant portion of 130 units produced from coal. While hydro power was used more than in 1980, oil and natural gas's electricity production dropped to only 2 units each.
On the other hand, France made use of a wider range of fuel source than Australia in 1980. Coal, oil, hydro power and nuclear power all contributed almost equally to electricity production, at around 20 units each, although hydro power was much less utilized compared to australia, producing only 5 units. After 20 years, France experienced a dramatic shift in production, with nuclear power producing 126 out of 180 units total. Coal and oil's yearly production remained relatively unchanged, but both natural gas and hydro power's figure declined to only 2 units of electricity.
*
*Charts* | The pie chart
Look at the images provided. More than one right? Therefore a plural word form for the image should be used. Anytime more than one image is presented, the reference goes from singular to plural form.
As for the trending statement, it must include a reference to all 5 power source types to complete the measurement sauce presentation. If not inclined to present the names in the trend, then list there along with the image identification section.
doubling France's figure
Both country references need true values mentioned in the manner present in the chart. Every sentence must offer factual information.This does not because the reader has to guess what the values are. |
**TOPIC:
*Nowadays some people choose to live in the city while other chooses to stay in the countryside.***
## What are the the advantages and disadvantages of city living over living in the countryside?
It is true that nowadays, leaving hometown to work in big cities is a popular trend of young people. While there are various reasons for this issue, it is actually a negative development because it is leading to the lack of labor force in some areas.
The main cause of the desire to live in big cities is to have a higher living standard. To be specific, mass communications portrays the modern and comfortable live in the metropolitan areas encourage young people to strive for a better future. Moreover, children often want to fulfill the wish of their parents with their future. For instance, in my hometown, 90 percent of young people who are 18 years old enough will go to big cities to have a job or achieve higher education. With them, this is an opportunity to have a well-paid job and a better future for not only them but also their kids. Nevertheless, I firmly believe that the increasing number of young people leaving hometown has a negative impact on the development at all. That leads to the lack of a workforce and the adverse affection on economic improvement. While there are only old people who do not have the ability to work, the quality and the quantity of products will reduce. Thus, the revenue from production and trade activities will be lower. As a result, the countryside can not develop the economy and the living standards of residents could not be improved. According to a report on VTV, in the countryside, old people and kids live without adults who have enough ability to work. So, they all feel lonely because of the lack of attention from their relatives. To sum up, it is clear that maybe leaving hometown will give young people chances to achieve a higher living standard. However, it is evident that we should think carefully about the sustainable developments of the countryside. | The essay, even though over 300 words in length will fail to recieve a passing score for 2 specific reasons:
- Incorrect discussion format
- Wrong presentation format
The incorrect discussion presentation was caused by the writer's misunderstanding of the discussion instruction. Let us outline this part to clearly show the mistake.
Discussion Instruction: WHAT ARE THE THE **ADVANTAGES AND DISADVANTAGES** OF CITY LIVING OVER LIVING IN THE COUNTRYSIDE?
Response:
...it is actually a **negative development**
I highlighted the conflicting parts to make the error of the writer more evident. The discussion was to follow the Advantage V. Disadvantage comparison format. Instead, the writer opted to make it a positive or negative single opinion discussion. The response is improper and not applicable to the discussion requirements. This is an automatic TA failure.
Next, this is to be presented in the standard 4 paragraph format composed of:
1 prompt restatement + opinion response
2 reasoning paragraphs that best explain the reasons for the opinion presented
1 concluding paraphrase that summarizes the topic and reasons at the end of the presentation.
What is evident in the presentation is that the discussion fails to meet the passing score requirements for this test. Even with partial LR and G R A scores applied, it will not recieve a base passing score. |
## IELTS WRITING TASK 1 (BAR CHART)
The bar chart illustrates the percentage participation of man in senior development position in three companies from 1980 to 2010.
Overall, all these companies showed a n upward trend throughout the period. The percentage of mean working in senior position had some fluctuations. The IBM initually had a lowest rate but at the end of the period it outraced the Microsoft and the Apple. At first, the rate of men participating in high position in the Apple company is the highest among the three companies, but it changed into the lowest rate at last.
From 1980 to 2010, the Microsoft's rate had slightly increase. It was about 9% in 1980 and it went uo approximately 1% next five years. Then, the rate rose to almost 12% in 1990. The figure shows a steady increase to the end of the period. It hit around 45% in 2010, being higher than that in 10 years ago about 27%. In general, the percentage participation of men in senior development position in Microsoft was often in the second.
The rate in IBM company at the beginning of the period was less than 5% and it creased about 1% next 5 years. In 1990, the rate reached around 12%, outraced the rate of Microsoft. From 1995 to 2010, there was a strong rise. The rate hit about 30% in 1995, 35% in 2000 and a high-point of 65% in 2010. The number of men participating in high position at the end of the period in IBM was the largest among the 3 companies.
The chart shows a gradual fluctuation in the percentage participation of men during the period. The rate in Apple was the highest from 1980 to 1990 (15%, 12% and 13% respectively). However from 1995 onwards, the Apple company no loger had the highest rate. The percentage reached around 18%, being less than that of IBM company approximately 10%. It rose about 2% in the next 5 years and 3% in 2010 | man
position
Word plural reference error.The image always refers to more than 1 in any instance. All task 1 references are plural in form so "men" not" man", "positions" never " position". Use the letter S within the reference word to signify the plural form.
initually
Sloppy spelling that shows poor vocabulary skills or lack of proofreading skills. The word is spelled as "initially".
outraced the
Refer to the speed of competition as pace so the word is "outpaced" without need to use the definite article "the".
had slightly increase
Had is the past refence to "have". So the word "increase" should have a D at the and to indicate the past event. Unless referring to a future projection, all references are in past form. |
## Male and female participants of Olympics
The given charts give details about the number of Olympics participants in both genders from 1924 to 2012. Above all, there was a significant increase in the total sum of participants. Overall, the number of male participants was always higher than that of female participants.
As can be seen from the first graph, in 1924, the Olympic champion took place with 3000 male competitors while hardly any females joined in. There was a noticeable development in male participants while that figure of females developed moderately. In 1952, over 5000 males went in for the Olympics while only 1500 females joined in. However, in 2012, the number of females athletics grew dramatically to nearly 5000, only 1000 lower than that of males.
The second graph described the growing tendency of the participants during 88 years. The number of contestants started with a nearby 4000 then growing dramatically in the following years before finishing at over 10000.
* | The given charts
Identify each chart type individually as each image has a seperate, standalone function in terms of data presentation. There are not both graphs. One is a line chart, as evidenced by the fluctuating lines. / The other is, for obvious reasons, called a bar chart.
Olympic champion
This refers to the overall winner of an event. Something not referenced in the presentation. This incorrect descriptive tuum lowers the vocabulary and grammar scores.
females athletics
Female athletes. The writer is definitely going to fail based on his inability to properly structure sentences and use English words within context. He needs to become more skilled in the word usage of the language.
during 88 years
Over 88 years. The writer is making so many coherence error based on word usage that the final score will definitely be failing. |
## High schools should require students to wear uniforms
These days, almost every school requires students to wear a uniform instead of their own clothes. While there are many people have raised against this trend, there are good reasons for students to be compelled to wear uniform at schools.
Firstly, uniform creates the similarity among students. Wearing a uniform, students will not feel unconfident or compare themselves with others only through clothes. Since students are required to wear uniforms, they do not have to worry about how they look or whether they look good as their friends. Moreover, everyone with the same look will prevent the disparity, which is unnecessary at school, especially in extracurricular activities of the school. In other words, uniforms nourish a sense of equality among students.
Secondly, a uniform is promoting, convenient and affordable to most students and parents. Due to wearing an alike uniform, students do not need to compare themselves with others. Therefore, they will concentrate more on the lessons than on clothes. In addition, uniform brings convenience. Students all need to wake up and go to school early. Consequently, uniforms assist them not to have to spend much indecisive time choosing clothes. Lastly, the uniform is more affordable than many other clothes. We just need two sets of uniforms and wear them throughout the year. As a result, instead of keeping up with the latest trend in fashion, we save our money with uniforms.
In conclusion, students' uniform at school represents their respect to teachers, classmates, and school. With everyone wearing the same clothes, this will shorten the distance among students. | The writer will definitely pass the task 2 essay presentation based on this particular topic. He has avoided the use of run on sentences and used transition words properly. All of the discussion topics in the individual paragraphs connect well to one another.Though the discussion is quick and to the point , these are all understandable for the most part. Except, there is one part that is not very well structured sentence-wise.
a uniform is promoting, convenient and affordable to most students and parents
Promoting what? Why should a uniform promote whatever itis? Why? This is a GRA and C + C problem. All sentences need to make clear sense to the reader when considering the connected references.
For the conclusion, do not forget to restate the topic sentence before repeating the personal opinion and reasons. That will create a well rounded and properly concluded discussion summary. |
**In many countries, people do not recycle their rubbish as much as they could.
## Why do you think it is? What can be done to change this?**
In many nations, people do not truly focus on garbage recycling which results from several reasons. Nevertheless, reasonable solutions can be taken to tackle this problem.
Obviously, the major cause of this matter is the recycling process, which is complicated and time-consuming. Even some materials are not multipurpose enough to be recycled, so it is not worthwhile for people to do this. For example, used plastic bags and paper can only be reused as decoration, which might take lots of effort for some people to think of ideas on how to recycle them reasonably, like making a gift wrap. In addition, inadequate education is also to be blame. It seems to me that most schools around the world neglect valuable lessons on the importance of recycling that people, especially the young, do not get the knowledge, probably because these lessons are considered more impractical than other subjects.
Nonetheless, in order to combat this trend, it is vital that the following solutions are applied. First, schools should add more lessons about recycling to curriculums to encourage students to recycle. Teachers can show documentary for students to watch or organize competitions and games to test their understanding. Second, governments should impose laws to the public. Particularly, individuals who do not sort every type of waste materials should be heavily fined. Lastly, the governments have to make recycling facilities available everywhere too, like placing recycling cans on streets and buildings, which reminds citizens to recycle.
In conclusion, complex recycling stages and lack of education are the main contributions to this matter, which can be solved by taking the steps mentions above into actions.
*please help me fix this essay. Thank you><* | The restatement + response in not properly presented. While the paraphrasing is acceptable, there was a failure to deliver question responses as directly required. The examiner does not need the questions repeated. He already knows what there are. He needs to see your ability to respond quickly to discussion questions as if you were participating in a class discussion. He is judging your swift logic and reasoning skills in this section. You failed to deliver.
inadequate education is also to be blame
How does this reason relate to the first? The reasoning in this paragraph lacks cohesion. The seperate topics leave the reader confused.
The solutions paragraph was again blurred by the sudden insertion of a fining sugstem. It disconnected the cohesive discussion in relation to the previously stated causes. |
## In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless
Thanks to the advancement of technology, our lives are increasingly civilized and developed in many aspects, especially transportation. It has been anticipated that shortly, automated driving system will soon replace humans in operating vehicles. From my perspective, I believe that the advantages of self-driving vehicles outweigh the disadvantages due to their convenience in reducing personnel errors.
Actually, there is a substantial number of people who earn their living by driving. Hence, if self-driving transports become popular, drivers will lose their jobs, which means higher social unemployment, and fewer occupational job opportunities for others. In addition, the technology is constantly updating; and during the process, some glitches can occur, code error is a case in point. Supposing there is any technical fault while driving, this will cause the accident. Furthermore, due to the use the same date and network protocol, it is very easy for hackers to collect personal data.
On the other hand, I firmly believe that automated vehicles will be beneficial to benefit our lives. First, driverless transport will eliminate costly human errors as they are based on a sophisticated system. Consequently, the majority of causes of accidents, including drunkenness and distracted driving, will be lessened. In a recent survey, it has been estimated that these cars can reduce 90% of accidents. Besides, traffic jams will be reduced thanks to a similar controlled system that applies to all vehicles. Furthermore self-driving cars would be able to move efficiently at optimized distances and also provide the best route to take.
In conclusion, while driverless cars have their limitations, they still have crucial advantages of changing our way of travel. In reality, I think the major challenge is how to combine fully automated vehicles and human-driven ones. | personnel
Incorrect word reference. Personnel refers to staff members of a particular function. That is different from and often confused with the word "personal" which indicates the actions of a person such as "a personal error ".
The question is one sided. since you believe and support the like that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, then the essay should offer evidence to support this theory. As such, presenting the alternate opinion first fails this presentation in 2 ways:
- It creates a confusing opinion presentation.
- It leaves the actual opinion under explained. There is not enough evidence presented to support the given point of view.
Always aim to disprove the opposing opinion to help support your statement. Never say the A and D are equal in perception as you presented here. |
## The Graph compares the rate of inflation and GDP in VietNam over the 12-years course from 1999 to 2011.
Overall, it is clear that there was an upward trend in the rate of inflation, while the GDP did not change too much during the given period. Also, both figures met at the same record in 2005.
At the beginning of the period, the figures for both inflation and GDP were nearly equal, at around 5%. After that, the rate of inflation dropped by 5% while the GDP rose slightly to 7% in 2000. Over the next 6 years, the figure of inflation experienced a sharp increase and reach a peak of 25% in 2008. Meanwhile, there was a slight grew in the rate of GDP between 2001 and 2007 before dipping down to nearly 5%.
The rate of inflation thereafter underwent a sharp drop to 7%, then suddenly increase again to 19% in 2011. The figure of GDP, meanwhile, had fluctuations in this stage, in 2010 the percentage increased but immediately fell to 6% in 2011.
*
*line graph* | Do not capitalize any sentence in the summary overview except for the first letter of every new sentence. Do not shout at the examiner. Use the correct variety of upper and lower case letters at all times. Keep the academic tone consistent throughout.
For the summary overview, there needs to be a clear identification of the 2 line representations. As these are color coded lines, the proper differentiation in the line descriptions, and correct line type identification based on the color code adds to the clear restatement of the image data.
grew
Word choice error. The word used should have been growth as it is a past form reference.
had fluctuations in this stage,
Are you referring to a different time frame from the one mentioned in the next line? Review your presentation for reference clarity after completing the draft. Revise as needed. |
## uk data on attending cinema by age
The line chart compares the share of four age groups attending cinema once a month in Great Britain from 1984 to 2000.
Overall, apart from the 7-14-year-old group, three other ones experienced a vast escalation during the 17-year period. Additionally, people whose ages range between 15 and 24 took up the highest proportion, while the opposite was true for the middle-aged group.
Commencing at about 18% in 1984, a massive growth was seen in the percentage of 15-24-year-old individuals, reaching its highest peak of approximately 60% in 2000. Likewise, the figure for people who are 35 or older rose gradually, from roughly 0% to relatively 15%.
The 1984-2000 period witnessed a slight fluctuation in the data of adults aging 25-35, starting at about 5% then soared up by approximately 20% 10 years later, followed by a mild oscillation but rose to more than 30% in the last year. In contrast, the youngest age group experienced a record of 10% in the beginning, after which it climbed to its peak of around 38% yet fell to reach the same figure as the second-oldest one.
* | The writer has done the simplest reporting presentation. The report avoids a complete and accurate comparison analysis. This shortcut long sentence presentation did that. Without a properly presented individual idea sentence per paragraph, the coherence and cokeswereas of the presentation is lacking. There is no true simple and complex presentation either. So there are at least 2 points where the writer will recieve problematic scores. The writer must focus on developing written thought clarity through the proper structuring of sentences based on analytical reports. This essay is risked and focused on simple scoring considerations only. A more comprehensive piece of writing would better help the overall score. Use 3-5 sentences to meet this challenge. |
IELTS Writing Task 2
***Some people say History is one the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today's world, subjects like Science and Technology are more important than History.
## Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.***
Essay: There is a debate whether history or some subjects like science and technology ought to be the major priorities in schools' curriculums. Despite the fact that history lessons convey many meaningful values to students, I strongly argue that science and computer subjects are more advantageous for pupils and society in the future.
To begin with, historical events are part of human society. In some countries, by learning about the country's war-time, students could understand all the harshness and losses that their ancestors had to suffer in the past. Thereby, they would value the peaceful lifetime they are enjoying now. Furthermore, history lessons not only teach students about wars or political events but also provide them the overall view in a variety of aspects of life such as the economy or industrial revolution. For example, as school children study about the history of oil, they would have a deep insight into oil's original source and how oil became an important part in many today's industries. This knowledge may help students gain basic understanding about things and relate them to social issues in modern life.
On the other hand, science and technology help students keep pace with cutting-edge innovations due to the ceaseless developments of the new era. Therefore, having skills to use advanced devices may create more chances for employment in different fields. Moreover, teaching scientific knowledge also acts as driving force to improve the human resource for coping with natural problems like pollution elimination or alternative energy explorations. Besides, the study of Biology and applied science has helped humans endure and outlive some fatal diseases and viruses. The COVID 19 pandemic is a clear example for this as thousands of citizens have been given vaccine doses and proper treatments with the aid of medical researches and advanced technologies.
To sum up, it is true that the study of history reminds us of our humble origin, I believe that science and technology are the key that lead to the future of human beings. | The summary overview is incomplete. It must restate both public opinions before you present your personal point of view. That is the task accuracy requirement and delivering only a partial representation means a failed topic restatement. You do not want to recieve a less than passing score in this section since it will be difficult to recover from it.
The reasoning discussions do not properly support the writers opinion. The contradictory opinion should be presented based on why it has public support, then, the writer should explain why this support is incorrect. The focus should be on the strength of the writers opinion when compared to other, alternate reasons. The first reasoning paragraph lacks that debate presentation. |
## The idea of one government system
In recent years, a number of people reckon that an international government would perform better than the individual one and vice versa. From my perspective, the benefits of this point of view are greater than the disadvantages and this paper will provide justifications for my opinion.
It is inevitable that one massive administration cannot control the world thoroughly. The more developed the world is, the harder it is to limit the criminal rate as there is only one authority and it has to take care of various aspects. Therefore, the delinquency level such as smuggle, transport drugs occurs more frequently which will shed a shadow on the security of the whole world.
On the other hand, several advantages can be recognized if the international administration replaces a particular one. Firstly, numerous shared issues, especially environmental problems, can be tackled more easily since there is only one authority existing and operating. Only thanks to the concerted efforts of the whole world, do profound problems such as global warming or climate change get better. As a result, a unified government plays a vital role in solving the problems which the world is suffering from recently. Moreover, it will get easier for people to travel here and there if one authority comes to power. Due to the unification of leadership, the borders between countries will be wiped out which facilitates transportation. Consequently, this will provoke trade and tourism between regions which leads to the flourishing of the world's economy.
In conclusion, the system of one government is a novel idea and to me, we can benefit from it strongly. However, the politicians should implement plausible measurements if this system comes into real life. | Use a single % defense for this discussion. since you were asked for your opeman, the foundation off the discussion must be based on 1 merits of the system you support. so the first reasoning paragraph is not considered as a part of a properly developed discussion. The second paragraph that supports the opinion will be considered instead. This partially developed response may not reach a passing base score. An additional supporting paragraph based on a related supporting reason would have completed the development of the opinion.
At this point, the writer shows an understanding of the topic and a clear openmon. It was the defense paragraph that went wrong. |
## Writing Task 2: Air Pollution.
People are doing many things that make air pollution, and it has made a pile of serious problems. This essay will write about air pollution's problems, its effect on Earth's creatures and what people should do to solve these problems.
Firstly, industry growing up every day with many manufacturing factories has been and was going to be built. The air waste from these factories like carbon dioxide, fume, ... spill out the environment. Secondly, dust is discharged from mobile sources (motor vehicles, trains, ...) covered almost all streets. When human exposed to those air pollutants, we can get respiratory diseases. Popular is coughing, wheezing, or difficulty in breathing. Carbon dioxide and sulfur made out acid rains, this kind of rain can damage forests and crop heavily, decrease water's quality in lakes, rivers. Also, smoke stacks from fossil power station, waste incinerators and furnace can be the cause of asthma, pneumonia and more dangerous- lung cancer on humans. Too many pollutants in the air are one of the causes of global warming - a bad environmental problem. So that, people need to protect the air in many ways. We can use bicycles or public transport instead of carbon dioxide-emitting transport. Limit the emissions by laws. Replace gasoline-fueled cars with zero-emissions vehicles.
In conclusion, because of the dangerous effects that air pollution creates, humans should handle and rescue the environment as soon as possible. | Please note that writing a mere 234 words could result in an automatic failing score.That is because there is a 250 minimum word requirement for the task. Anability to meet this count indicates a severe lack of vocabulary, grammar skills, and logical thinking. To avoid the word count deductions, write at least 250 words. That will only earn base score considerations but, will not gain any word deductions that may lead to a failing score.
Avoid further grammar deductions due to incorrect punctuation usage. A comma cannot be be followed by any other punctuation mark. A punctuation mack is used one at a time. That is the standard punctuation usage rule and has been for ages. Do not try to change grammar rules that have been set in stone. The writer will recieve a failing G R A score because of the obvious lack of sentence structure and punctuation usage skills. |
## The importance of literature and history for pupils
I feel that school should emphasize national literature and history for various reasons. To begin with, youngsters like learning about their surroundings and by studying their country's idea, culture, and history, they begin to create a sense of identity. Simultaneously, this strategy appeals to parents who have investigated the same literature and historical events as their children and can assist them with schooling. For example, English youngsters read Shakespeare and learn about the Battle of Hastings in the same way that their parents did, demonstrate a generational educational continuity. Finally, educators have a scope of instruction due to the concentration on national literature and history, make curriculum creation easy
On the contrary, pupils may face unnecessary difficulties and misunderstanding when studying world events and foreign novel. I don't think it's beneficial to teach French or American history to an English child who hasn't studied his country history in depth. Certainly, the child will be able to comprehend historical events that occurred in London rather than Paris or Washington. Similarly, any exposure to international literature may necessitate some understanding of a foreign language or translation abilities. Primary and secondary school students are just unprepared for such difficulties. | The essay does not meet the 4 paragraph discussion format for a task 2 essay. When the word count is checked, it becomes clear that the writer did not with the minimum 250 word count either. This presentation will not get a preliminary passing score at this point. The writer has failed to represent the basic requirements because he is not familiar with the required writing format. Failing the preliminary considerations makes it difficult to achieve a passing score when individual sections are relieved. It is important that the writer learns the various task 2 response methods before proceeding with more practice essays.
Next time, divide the presentation as follows:
Paragraph 1 : Restatement + opinion
Paragraph 2 : Reason 1 + explanation + example
Paragraph 3 : Reason 2 + explanation + example
Paragraph 4: Discussion restatement + closing sentence
This is the basic task 2 discussion format. In this version ) only the reasoning paragraphs are presented. |
## distance working pros and cons
With the flourish of technology, working online has increasingly emerged as a new development, several people choose to work at home because of its benefits and convenience. I believe that the advantages of distance working are far weightier than its drawbacks.
On the one hand, working at home may have some negative effects. Firstly, procrastinating is an example. This is because there is not anyone who forces you to work as well as supervises you. As a result, it may lead to missing the deadline or affect your productivity. Moreover, when you are at home, a lot of distractions surround you such as noise, your phone, and so on, and you cannot highly concentrate on your work as a consequence. For example, while you are working, your parents come into your room and ask you something and then you will have to chat with them.
On the other hand, the number of time that will be saved stems from working from home. For instance, instead of waking up at 7 o'clock to prepare and traveling to the workplace, now you can get up later and spend more time for yourself, let alone in traffic jams. It is researched that when the employees have more time for recreational activities, their productivity will be boosted significantly. In addition, working at home also do wonders for the environment. In light of reducing the number of vehicles, the carbon footprint releases into the air will be mitigated.
In conclusion, although distance working can have impacts on the productivity of the employee, the benefit of this trend cannot be downplayed. | I believe that the advantages of distance working are far weightier than its drawbacks.
The original prompt does not ask you to present an opinion. The discussion instruction requires a non-opinionated advantage V. disadvantage presentation only. A neutral discussion that offers suggestions, but not a decision or one- sided opinion to the reader. The discussion approach is incorrect this time.
your parents
Most people across the world do not live with their parents as most Asians tend to do. so there is no danger of parents walking in on a person while working. Use a more mature and westernized sample next time.
The conclusion does not meet the 2 sentence, 40 word requirement. It also offers a repeat of a single point of miw opinion in contradiction with the orginal discussion requirements. |
## results of surveys about mobile phones in Africa
The pie charts demonstrate the proportion of 4 primary reasons accounting for teenager coming from one African country using their phones over a period of 3 years from 2019
It is clear that proportion of using digital camera increased over the period shown while the opposite was true for making phone calls. It is noticeable that social medias were the most common reason for using phones.
Regarding the social medias, the figure began at 50% in 2016, then experienced a marginal decrease by 2% in the following year. Similarly, the proportion of email declined from 25% to 24%. In the year 2018, there was a slight increase in the figure for social medias. In contrast, a substantial decrease of 4% was seen in the figure for email. At the end of the period, the percentage of social medias increased to 56%, however, that of email decreased by 1%
In 2016, the percentage of making phone calls stood at 10% compared to 15% for digital camera. In the year 2017, the figure for phone calls increased by 3%, however, that of digital camera stabilized. From the year 2018 onwards, there was a downtrend in phone calls. To be specific, the figure ended at 5%. In contrast, the proportion of digital camera increased considerably to 20% at the end of the period | The pie charts
How many pie charts? A reference to the number of images and how these images are divided should be clearly represented because each image has a specific measurement representation. What are the 4 primary reasons? What were the inclusive dates of measurement? The summary overview is not complete in terms of short information. The presentation also needs to be spread out over several sentences to achieve summary clarity. Yes, you mention these information in better detail in the paragraphs. However, these need to be summarized for the reader to deliver a short form of the intricate reports in the succeeding paragraphs.
At the end of the period
What was the end of the period?
The writer gets the information into the report, but does not focus on the sentence structure in the presentation. The lack of focus on reduced GRA errors are what limits the score of this presentation. |
*Please help me better my writing by giving your feedbacks on my structure, grammar, vocabulary and idea. I will really appreciate it. Thank for reading!*
## IELTS Writing task 1: How geothemal energy is used to produce electricity
Write at least 150 words:
The diagram shows the process of producing energy from cold water to electricity, the geothermal energy.
Overall, it takes a total of 5 steps to finally converts cold water into electricity. It uses a geothermal zone under the ground in the process.
At the first stage, cold water stored in tank is pumped down to underground for 4.5km using the injection well. After that, the flow of cold water continues to experience a high in temperature by going through geothermal zone which includes hot rocks in it. It now becomes hot water and get the way to the second production well.
At next stage, hot water is pumped up to the condenser, where steam is able to be form. The stream now continues to power the turbine, followed by the start of the generator, produces electricity. The tower then receives the electricity and then send to the consumer who is in use. This process continue repeatedly to satisfied the needs for electricity.
* | pumped down
hot rocks
Use a different descriptive phrase next time. Avoid using the same presentation words from the original. When the writer uses the same words, the writer is deemed to ber incapable of writing in his own words, based on his own understanding. The assumption will be that the writer has a limited vocabulary and can only write in memorize phrases. It lowers the vocabulary related scores.
get the way
This is an unclear reference phrase. Wrong words were used to refer to "proceeds" or "proceeded" to the next level. Sentence structure in relation to word usage is becoming an obvious problem in the report.
The tower then receives
Refer to this as the final stage in the process. It is important to seperate the procedures towards the end, where the final steps tend to be merged in the report. This removes clarity from the pargraph presentation and could affect the clarity score. |
## Task 1 - Planned Shopping Centre Locations
Given is a town planning map that reveals the potential sites for two new shopping malls as well as major transportation features of an unnamed town.
It is apparent from the information supplied that shopping center A is expected to be situated in the central district of the town, whereas shopping center B is likely to be placed in the countryside. Also, the sites can be compared in terms of access by road and rail, and their relative positions to different zones and other towns.
Looking at the planning map in detail, shopping center B is on the northwest of shopping center A. It is also interesting to note that the expected location of shopping center A is in the central business district, where cars are not permitted. By stark contrast, the probable location for shopping center B is in the rural zone to the northwest, which is much far away from the town center.
As for major transportation routes, shopping center A is expecting to be not only close to the intersection of two main roads but also to the railway line － both roads and railway line run through the entire town from countryside to central district. Meanwhile, shopping center B is likely to be situated between the railway line and the northwest road.
*
*Question* | Try to deliver a more precise review by using the 3-5 paragraph presentation. Using the compressed presentation method is certainly quicker, but limits your ability, as the writer and reported, to fully utilize the C+C and GRA scoring considerations. The limited sentence presentation also limits the ability of the reporter to deliver a proper mix of simple and complex sentences. The run-on presentations do not always help the presentation. In the task 1 essay, the longer and more detailed the sentences are, the better the scoring possibilities. Aim to fulfill the requirements for the C+C and GRA sections as these are the more notable scoring sections for this task. The grammar is good. It does not contain any grammar errors that would reduce the score but, the presentation is too limited to help you gain a higher consideration in the end,. |
***As well as making money, businesses also have social responsibilities.***
## Do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, besides maximizing profit, all the companies and groups around the world should care about making benefits for society. In my point of view, I highly agree with that opinion because community and the environment have abundantly contributed to their businesses.
In one hand, almost governments always give many policies to encourage the development of all the fields. Currently, the national banks have given companies a lot of discount debts to help them enlarge their business. In addition, when a group or factory is at the edge of bankrupt, many leaders of cities or countries will support them in various ways, Moreover, the model of special economic area that allows companies to work with massive advantages is applied in many nations. All the chances and opportunities that the community creates for the businesses are for the hope they will attribute to a better society.
On the other hand, to run a business, the environment is sacrificed greatly. The pollution problem is a global issue and it will never disappear except for the elimination of industries and human activities. People want to be wealthy so we destroy many forests, wasted a lot of regions, and making animals' habitat loss for our businesses. To respond to human destruction, nature has become worse and worse. Therefore, to fix our mistake, the companies need to support the government and society to rebuild our nature.
In conclusion, making profits is the most concentration when everyone starts a business but prolonged development is the key for the success of a company. So, every business should have social responsibilities. | all the companies and groups around the world should care about making benefits for society
This part cannot be stated as a fact. Rather, it should be represented as a possible discussion point due to implied conflicting views in the original. Remember that this is a written debate. 2 sides need to be present for an effective discussion.
I ~~highly~~ agree
No need to get emotional. This is a simple rather than extent discussion format. Just agree and say why using 2 reasons.
In one hand
On the other hand
Do not use comparative phrases as much as possible. These have a tendency to alter the perception of your work from a single opinion to a comparative one. Use these phrases only in discuss both views presentations.
Save for a few errors, the essay discusses a single opinion as expected and shows logical discussion points. |
The prompt:
***Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school.***
## Discuss both views and give your opinion
My essay:
As there have been more and more ways to achieve a well-paid job, debates about whether university and college education is necessary or not have sparked over the years. Some believe it is the best route to success, whereas others argue that getting a job immediately after school would be ideal. Personally, I agree that having a high education background would be the easiest path to high-end careers.
Admittedly, there are multiple individuals who dropped out from colleges or universities, and became well-known for their achievements, Bill Gates as an example. Moreover, some may inherit businesses from their parents, thus, do not need to pursue higher education. As such, it leads people to falsely believe that universities are unnecessary to achieve success. Whilst that may be true for some selected few, in my opinion, the majority will not be as lucky, or as talented as they would believe themselves to be. Some studies were done in Vietnam regarding this matter. Up to 70% of startups by dropout students fail after two to three years. The reason was mainly the lack of skills, knowledge, and the understanding of the laws, which are otherwise taught in universities.
Many public surveys suggest, people with bachelor degrees or higher have a rather low percentage of unemployment. On the contrary, around 8 to 10 percent of people who have only finished high school are unemployed. Not to mention people of higher education make significantly more than those who are not. While the data may vary amongst sources, the common trend is that people with high school diplomas or lower are not as successful in terms of income as people believe. Therefore, I believe education would be the key to success.
In summary, I conclude that universities and colleges surely help people reach their career goals easier than without. Although the success of some people without the need of high level education is undeniable, it should be safe to assume such people as irregularities.
Thank you for your help. | In summary, I conclude
There is no sense in using 2 placement phrases in the end. Be more creative. Use a more academic wrap to the discussion. Show a college level closing statement rather than an ESL classroom taught conclusion summary.
The discussion is well developed and shows a cohesive analyses of both points of view. The writer effectively presents the pros and cons of each in a manner that considers all possible discussion points. These created well explained reasoning paragraphs that the examiner can appreciate.
However, there are certain sections where the writer comes across as ESL. More language fluency practice should help fix that. Scores are also awarded for ENL writing tones. |
REVIEW:
You are the arts review writer for a magazine. Your editor has asked you to review a film. Choose a
film that you have seen. Describe the plot and the characters involved. Say who the film is suitable for
and why. Mention any special effects or aspects of the film that stood out in some way.
Would you recommend the film? Why, why not?
Write your review.
## Love always wins!
Yesterday, I watched an incredibly moving film. It's called 'The last letter from you lover'. It's a drama and romance film which is based on the bestseller romantic novel written by JoJo Moyes.
The film shows the unbelievable story of a journalist called Ellie (Felicity Jones), when she discovers an intriguing love letter. As she is getting more and more involved in the love story that the letters hide, she empathises a lot with the couple. They happen to be an enchanting couple that have to live their love in secret, they are just lovers, and they cannot live together. To make matters even worse, the girl, Jennifer loses all her memories in a car crush accident so, she has to retry all of them progressively.
The aspects of the film that I liked the most were the charming places where the film is set in and the incredibly realistic dialogues between the characters of the film.
Teenagers and adults will enjoy this film, since it makes the mature audience realise it is a story that could happen to everyone. You will want to help the couple to get together and restart their lives as I did when I watched it.
I strongly recommend watching "The last letter from your lover", it will make you realise the value of real love and appreciate the help of the people that surrounds you in your daily life. | A film reviewer knows to start the presentation by offering a summary of the story, without directly revealing the ending. Never forget to mention the immediate cast names along with the writer, director producer, and year of release credits.
This is a good summary that does not try too hard to be a good review. It has won to be better. There should have been a deeper discussion of the set design as it relates to the 2 eras depicted in the movie. The directors approach to the constantly changing timelines ( the story is told in flashbacks), and how well the actors portrayed their roles would have been necessary to create a comprehensive film review as required by the writing instructions. |
## fast foods expeditures
**Task 1 : The Bar graph below shows the Expenditure in Million Pounds on fast food items by income groups in the UK.**
My answer:
The bart chart illustrates data on the spending of the income groups citizens in the UK on three categories of fast food in 1990.
Overall, the high and average class British prefer consuming hamburgers, while the low class spent the most money on fish and chips during the 1900s.
The amount of spending on hamburgers was highest for rich people, around 47 million pound, which is just over 30% for the average income class and below 15% for the low-income class. Two other popular fast food items among the high earning people were pizza and fish and chips which consumed more than 15 million pounds in 1990.
Among the average earning people, the second most favourite fast food item was fish and chips for which they made an expense of 25 million pounds in this year. On the other hand, pizza was the least popular item among the people of low income, at just above 6 military pounds and they preferred eating fish and chips and hamburger to eating the pizza.
* | pizza and fish and chips which consumed more than 15 million pounds
Seperate the data presentation. Pizza was consumed ata different financial representation. Do not assume shared data. This error shows that the image values were not properly assessed. One item= one reference. Avoid merging information the avoid information errors.
47 million pound
The currency reference is missing an S at the end. This should be presented in plural form. The currency reference is correct in other sections.
On the other hand,
What happened to the one hand? When using this comparison reference, do it in partner references/phrases. Otherwise, it doesn't make sense to use the reference.
and they preferred eating fish and chips and hamburger to eating the pizza.
This should be an individual sentence as the food reference in for an unrelated disk
The writer has done a pretty good job at analysis presentation. More grammar and vocabulary lessons are needed since there are where most of the errors forus. |
***In some parts of the world, the rate of divorce has increased dramatically over the past few decades.***
## Explain some possible reasons for this problem and suggest some solutions.
In line with the shift in time, a recent phenomenon on dramatical increase in divorce indicates some concerns in terms of problems from getting married. This essay will elaborate on some probable causes and positive solutions which can improve this situation
There are concerning reasons leading couples to split up and even go to divorce. Firstly, many married couples live with extended family, therefore, conflicts may occur between the young and the old generation during daily activities. For instance, young couple likely to have parties with friends at home but their parents assume those activities as ill-manners need to be fixed. Hence, young couple feel unhappy and depressed in their relationship. Secondly, having child costs married people more than when they are single. In the past, family usually helps pairs with taking care of their kids and helping them with expenses. However, present married duos have to manage everything, especially when their kids are still newborn, they look after their children and work to pay the bills at the same time. For that reason, they get much burden and depression.
However, this situation can be improved by some possible solutions. The young and the elderly in extended family can confess with each other and find out a way to neutralize the lifestyle and bridge the gap between generations. Besides, married pairs may have therapy with psychologist before and during their marriage. These activities help them to relieve the stress and concerns they hold in their relationship.
In conclusion, , by conducting some positive solutions to resolve common negative thoughts and feeling of married people, this situation would be better. | The prompt restatement is acceptable. The opinion part though, is not represented at all since there are no direct question responses provided. The discussion outline does not have a clear direction as required by the questions provided.
~~There are concerning reasons leading couples to split up and even go to divorce.~~
There is no need to repeat this information. It does not work as a proper topic sentence since it only repeats the last line of the previous paragraph. The first sentence of the reasoning paragraph must indicate the topic or subject of the paragraph immediately.
The solutions presented do not solidly relate to the previously stated problems. The solutions must always be developed based on the previously stated reasons.
A concluding summary must have 2 sentences comprised of 40 words minimum. This presentation does not present an effective discussion recap. |
## Employment patterns in great britain in 1992
**The two pie chart below show some employment patterns in great britain in 1992**
Given are the pie charts comparing two sexes in terms of the proportion of occupations in the UK in the year 1992.
Overall, the majority of British women preferred non-manual jobs, while the figure for men was marginally fewer. It is also evident that clerical works were widely prevalent among the women, on the contrary, men were not interested in this form of jobs.
As can be seen in the graphs, the rate of managerial and professional employment was highest in both 2 genders, 29% for women and 36% for men respectively; conversely, that of general labourers works were relatively negligible in the studied year.
Regarding the percentage of clerical and related occupations in 1992, men overnumbered women in the ratio of 5 to 1 (nearly a third and 6%, respectively). In contrast, the opposite trend was true in the other manual jobs. Meanwhile, the proportions of craft among 2 sexes were the same, which stood at somewhere in the vicinity of a quarter.
Thanks for your help !
* | pie charts comparing two sexes
Clarify that the pie charts for each gender is seperate. This confusing reference to the number of pie shouts is precisely why the image number must be mentioned in the first sentence along with the image type.
proportion of occupations
What are the occupations? The rundown would help add to the reference in the trending statement.
[~~quote=papcaii]It is also evident that clerical works were widely prevalent among the women, on the contrary, men were not interested in this form of jobs.[/quote]~~
One trend will suffice. In cases where there is a possibility of 2 trends, pick the strongest one and save the weaker reference for the reporting paragraph.
The writer has forgotten to reference the actual measurements in relation to several mentions. Where a measurement value is present in the image, it must be reported in the paragraph presentation. |
## Earth's Water contamination
It is a universal consensus that water, which is a vital part of our existence, is contaminated in some parts of our planet. Long-term polluting has its own negative impact on the environment.
Probably there are many most noteworthy factors which damage marine habitat are relevant to humans' ignorance. Firstly, it is the spills or leaks from oil and chemical containers, and it leads to result in that the marine life is damaged and the ocean water is contaminated. Moreover, people tend to waste plastic goods in the seas, rivers, ocean or bury microplastics rubbish. They will lead to polluting sea, river, or even groundwater geyser. Besides, the sewages from industrial zones or run-off containing fertilizers and pesticides from farming areas into river water also contributes to water pollution. Also, rising temperatures due to global warming are a major concern in terms of water pollution. Global warming causes water temperatures to rise, which can kill aquatic animals. When big amounts of dead water occur, it is going to contaminate water sources, exacerbating the problem.
Because of many negative effects to water resources if long-period pollution. We should have many achievable solutions. First of all, we should put the waste in the bin and sort garbage. Besides, we can recycle the garbage if we can. For instance, after using plastic bottles, we can cut and design them into pots, or pen and pencil holders. Furthermore, we should use many eco-friendly goods instead of many items which are unable to recycle or reuse as plastic, takeaway coffee cups, disposable nappies. Moreover, we can educate people to raise awareness in garbage handling and sorting through forms such as launching a painting competition and recycling trash contests. In addition, we should also report to the authorities if any industrial plants release untreated wastewater into the environment.
In conclusion, contamination of water is the biggest issue that happens in some countries all over the world. And our duty is operating many preventative projects to reduce contamination. | Long-term polluting has its own negative impact on the environment.
This is not a direct response to the reason and solution question presented. A lack of discussion topic outline in relation to the qquestions was necessary to show the writer's clear opinion and discussion process within the next 2 paragraphs.
Probably
Avoid words of uncertainty. Ensure that all words used contain an air of understanding, expertise, and clarity. Remember that such words reduce the clarity of opinion upon which certain scores are based.
The reasoning discussion is so busy presenting reasons that the writer forgot to develop cohesive discussion points. The paragraph lacks clear idea development due to the wrong discussion focus.
Because of many negative effects to water resources if long-period pollution.
What is the point of this sentence? There is no logical thought present.
Because
And
connecting words cannot be used to start a sentence. Remember that these are used to create a budge between 2 ideas in one sentence. |
## ielts1 - changes in the layout of the ground floor
The two pictures illustrate how the layout of the ground floor in this house will be changed.
Overall it can be seen that the ground floor undergoes a dramatic transformation with significant changes in interior construction.
According to the existing floor layout, there are two internal doors in the top middle of this floor plan. However, two of them will be replaced by the bigger stair and will be moved to the bottom middle of this floor. Moreover, there will be no space for storage under stairs in future changes. Besides, the proposed kitchen will be set up with some kitchen furniture that does not exist in the current layout. One more major transformation is the internal wall. Two walls will be demolished to expand the size of the living room in the future.
However, the layout of the two entrance doors is still remained unchanged in the proposed ground floor plan.
* | The word presentation, though passing in minimum consideration, does not allow for a maximum scoring consideration. If the writer aims to write 175-200 words, his writing will be considered well-developed and more analyzed. Limiting the written words also places an early cap on the sectional scores. Do not overwrite, but do not write too little either. Just meeting the word requirement does not boost the possible score. Use a middle word count to achieve a better score.
There should be 3 paragraphs of at least 3 sentences each. The discussion is not balanced. The analysis should have more depth. Something like:
Paragraph 2: Analyze the original image
Paragraph 3: Compare the changes or unchanged portions within the images. |
***Some people think the best way to solve global environmental problems is to increase the cost of fuel.***
## To what extent do you agree or disagree
Society has witnessed environmental degradation in recent years, and finding a way to protect our nature is being considered as a top priority across the globe. Among solutions put forth, it is argued that increasing the price of fuel is the optimal one. While I agree that this is a feasible measure to deal with the above-mentioned phenomenon, it should be combined with other methods to maximize the effectiveness.
It is undeniable that raising fuel cost is beneficial to the environment to a certain extent in my opinion. With higher costs charged for petrol or oil, travelling by private vehicles might be discouraged, because commuters are now thinking more about their monthly expenditure when commuting with such automobiles and motorcycles. On that account, public transports might be considered as a substitute and are more likely to be chosen. With higher capacity, if public transport are packed with passengers, the amount of vehicles exhaust fumes released to the air could be significantly reduced and the air pollution might be mitigated, as a result.
However, I believe that increasing the fuel price solely is not optimal and long lasting, unless it is taken with other measures simultaneously. Besides encouraging public transport, another measure that might also efficiently deploy the capacity of vehicles is promoting car-sharing programs, which could play a pivotal role in reducing the exhaust emissions as well. In addition, a limitation of carbon footprint per capita might be issued, so that global warming could be slowed down. Finally, the public's awareness towards environmental importance and responsibility should be raised. With a deeper understanding about our world, people's behaviors might be done with a higher respect for ecological criteria.
In conclusion, through diminishing vehicles exhaust fumes, a higher cost for fuel might obviously exert a positive impact on the global environment. Nevertheless, this solution, from my perspective, should be implemented together with other methods to elevate the effectiveness.
*I hope that you could give feedback and score for me. I really appreciate for your help. Thank you.* | The prompt restatement should never be over discussed. The topic presentation should not alter the original presentation by digressing from the original subject as presented. Reword it but do not add information not included in the first version. As for the opinion, "While I agree" is not the correct response format. A more acceptable response frame is " I agree with the statement to the extent that... " Such a response gives an advanced and more analytical opinion as it allows for a thesis based extent representation.
[~~quote=nartarus2000]to a certain extent in my opinion[/quote]~~
This is a highly confusing statement that does not add meaning to the paragraph. It is a repetition of the last sentence in the first paragraph.
The essay is over. discussed without truly presenting a coherent explanation. Practice thought clarity within a maximum of 5 sentences per paragraph.
\* Contact me privately for scoring services. |
## IELTS WRITING TASK 1 - THE LINE GRAPH
**Task:** You should spend about 20 minutes on this task.
The graph below shows the number of university graduates in Canada from 1992 to 2007.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
You should write at least 150 words.
**Answer:**
The graph illustrates the number of students in both genders who graduated in Canada between 1992 and 2007. It is obvious that the statistics of university graduates have an upward trend in that period.
Overall, it is clearly shown in the graph that the number of female graduates is dominated the number of male graduates. However, both female and male students who completed their course to get the degree at university is increased every year.
Started in 1992, there are nearly 100,000 female students that became alumni of the university, while the number of male students who finish their study at university accounts for approximately 70,000 people.
After that, it can be seen that the number of graduates from university increased rapidly year by year. Although the trend dropped slightly from 1996 to 2000, it goes back to its previous trend in the next following years. The number of female graduates reach its peak at about 150,000 students in 2006, meanwhile the number of male is less than female around 50,000 people.
Please give me some advice for improvement in this writing. Many thank!
* | The graph illustrates the number
Identify the type of graph and numerical reference for the student count. What was said or implied in the orginal must be expanded upon in a clear manner within the overview. That is because of the TA scoring considerations for this task.
is
All data is from previously collated information. Use the proper past tense reference (Was). Trenal usage is a problem throughout the presentation.
The paragraphs are mostly not properly formatted. Aside from the final paragraph, the early presentations do not meet the required 3-5 sentence presentation template. The long 2 sentence presentations are run- on in format. These lower the GRA score as the long sentences do not create a proper simple and complex sentence paragraph. Please learn to properly divide the thought presentations based on proper analytical considerations to avoid the same errors going forward.
Sentence clarity is an issue in this presentation the sentence structures are weak due to improper time references and word usage. Improvements in these areas will help improve the scores in specific areas as well. |
**TOPIC:
*Some people think that governments should ban dangerous sports, while others think people should have freedom to do any sports or activity.*
## Discuss both views and give your own opinion.**
People often have different views about whether dangerous sports such as hang gliding and car racing should be prohibited. Although there are good arguments in favor of this ban, I personally believe that it is better to give participants the right to follow the sports they want, as long as they are well-trained and fully aware of the safety guidelines.
On the one hand, banning dangerous sports might be reasonable given the safety of the participants and other people. Firstly, it can prevent possible injuries for the players, who might easily get hurt if they neglect the coach's guidance or when the equipment malfunctions. Besides that, making extreme sports illegal can minimize unnecessary casualties, not only for the player but also for the spectators who happen to be near the site. The fact that extreme sports might be dangerous and cost people's lives explains why many people urge the government to take drastic actions.
On the other hand, I am convinced that that extreme sports should not be forbidden. First, people deserve to have the right and freedom to pursue whatever sports they want to. We are living in a democratic era where individual's interests should be respected as long as these choices are not against the law. Therefore, it would be improbable for the authority to ban dangerous sports - a leisure activity shared and enjoyed by many people. Second, the so-called notion of "dangerous sports" is actually not as dangerous and risky as people often assume. Participants usually have to go through some training beforehand to ensure that they know how to do the sports properly and safely, which can minimize accidents caused by participants' carelessness or negligence.
For the reasons above, it seems to me that although there exist some safety-related concerns towards extreme sports, they should be made optional for people. | The first paragraph does not provide a restatement + opinion. Rather, the writer entered into a direct discussion in what should have been a mere paraphrasing paragraph. It does not accomplish the following:
- Present an accurate representation of the orginal topic
- Refer to the 2 public opinions individually
- Create a comprehensive thesis opinion
This misrepresentation is enough to make the test - taker fail the first half of the test, leading to an insurmountable low over all score. Please provide an accurate version of the orginal instead. When discussing the public opinions, present your point of view for each. Indicate why you do not support or, why you support the public opinion. That would be the most score efficient way to discuss the topic. |
## IELTS WRITING TASK 1 - UNDERGROUND STATION PASSENGER NUMBERS IN LONDON
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
You should write at least 150 words.
This graph illustrates the amount of people take train at London Underground Station in a day for sixteen hours (6 am - 10 pm).
Overall, people generally take train at the station starts from 6 am until 10 pm. The train has the most amount of passengers at 8 and 18 o'clock. The number of passengers reaches its lowest point at 6 am and 4 pm.
At 8 o'clock, the amount of passengers is exactly 400. Following to 18 o'clock, there is a slight decrease in the number of passengers which is just under 400. Meanwhile, in the afternoon at 12 am, 13 pm and 14 pm, the number of passengers does not change much and increases slightly (from above 250 people to 300 people)
At 6 am and 4 pm, people are less likely taking train to go to places. There are just 100 passengers at those two hours. After reaches its lowest point, the number of passengers gradually increases in the two hours (200 people and at/less than 400 people)
* | The writer is trying to over extend the analysis into a 4 paragraph presentation when the provided image is good only for 3 paragraphs. The essay, due to the forced lengthening is leaning more towards under- analysis since there are only 2 sentences per paragraph rather than the better analyzed 3-5 sentence presentation. A 4 paragraph presentation works best when more than 2 images are analyzed and reported on.
There is an overuse of parenthesis in the presentation. Using it once in a presentation is enough. Try to use other punctuation macks and be more analytical in the data presentation instead. Compare and contrast the data for maximum effect. |
## long-lasting products vs low-cost items
The question of whether items ought to be produced with a long-term utilization or have an affordable price has been a matter of debate since the beginning of the twenty-first century. While there are some benefits of economical products, I would agree that it is better to possess a high-quality long-lasting products.
Populous believe the advantages of long-term stocks are significantly greater than their disadvantages. The main reason is that good products may be used for a long time and the customer can receive returns from their extended use. It may also be said that the upkeep for such reliable things is comparably much less. Moreover, a remarkable illustration is that many people have higher quality furnishings so they don't have to modify the things. Consequently, superb items are always quite pricey.
On the other hand, others think economic products are far superior, because everyone can purchase them. A large proportion of people live in impoverishment and cannot afford to purchase costly things. Additionally, it is commonly stated that an enormous proportion of the money we spend is spent to cover publicity, advertising and brand value rather than quality. People are of the idea because many people have felt the bitterness of advertising and marketing strategy. For instance, the toys shipped from China, the same manufacturer produces identical toys for many firms and the company charges significantly higher compared to others, with a large brand name.
In conclusion, I think both arguments are valid. However, I believe that long-lasting commodities have an advantage over low-cost items because long-lasting products may be used for a long time without requiring further maintenance. | The prompt restatement fails to provide the previously stated reasons for each public opinion prior to the personal opinion. The restatement is inaccurate. The idea presentation for each is incomplete and without basis.
Populous
Incorrectly used word reference. While it is an advanced word,the writer does not realize it does not accurately refer to people within the meaning of the sentence. Words must be used to refer to the correct sentence meaning.
I think both arguments are valid
This is a personal opinion that should be developed in a single paragraph. This cannot be introduced in the conclusion as new topics cannot be introduced in this section. While the phrase "In conclusion" was used, there was no real conclusion presented. Mere use of the please, without presenting the appropriate information does not create a conclusion. |
## Many teenagers these days prefer socialising online to meeting one another in person
In contemporary time, researchers have found that lots of teenagers in the modern world would rather socialize online than communicate in person. This issue creates tons of consequences for youngster all over the world. However, any difficult problems always have solutions if we make enough efforts. This issue will be discussed in this essay along with some possible solutions that may be implemented to cope with the problem.
The first serious consequence caused by communicating through Internet is to ruin your eyes. In modern days, most of the youth, especially ones coming from developed countries are digital natives, so for that logic, theirs eyes were affected harmfully since they were little. There are so many evidences to prove this problem. For example, it is easy to see that nearly 90% students in every primary school in Vietnam have to wear glasses, due to the fact that their focal length is much shorter than normal ones. The next obstacle is the high rate in autistic adolescent due to not meeting people in person. The reason being that youngster wasting their time on chatting with friends on social media such as Facebook, Instagram, etc. , so for this reason, they just have a small round of friends and do not know how to express their ideas in real life. For instance, in recent days, there is numerous newspaper writing about using Internet too much make people become crazy and autistic.
However, fortunately, we can solve this issue by making enough efforts. Parents should not allow their children using smart phones when they are too young, or cut off the amount of time for children to socializing through Internet. Besides that, it is better if schools organize outdoor activities for their students. Moreover, government need to heavily taxes on game company for the purpose of reducing the introduce of new games.
In conclusion, there is big trouble facing people all over the world by virtue of socializing online. Nevertheless, it is absolutely possible to iron out this issue. | In contemporary tim
in the modern world
Repetitive word meaning. Both refer to the 21st century. Use one reference only. There is no need to say it twice.
tons
Non-academic word choice. Use formal academic words only.
youngster all over the world
Plural form of youngster should be used since "all over the world" is a plural phrase.
any difficult problems always have solutions
The question was" what are the reasons for this ?" The writer did not respond to the question.
some possible solutions
Again, this is not the correct response to the query" how can they be encouraged to meet in person?"
\* The writer failed to create a proper thesis statement both times.
people
Not people. Just the youth. Do not change the topic focus.
iron out this issue
What issue ?
Parents should not allow
This does not explain how teenagers can be encouraged tomeet in puson than online.
The summary conclusion does not properly recap the previous discussion points. The essay has failed to address the task properly. |
Without putting people's health and well-being at the centre of public policy, we won't be able to realize our healthy future. A person's economic prospects are harmed by poor health throughout their life. Poor health impairs the potential of early babies and children to build human capital; ill-health affects the quality of life and labour market results of adults, and disadvantage accumulates over time. Many of the circumstances necessary for transformation are in place. There is abundant evidence, for example, that investment in public health and primary prevention pays off in terms of both health and economic returns. Similarly, digital technology has made various services and goods across many industries secure, quick, and seamless. | This is not an acceptable statement response. Consider the focus of the prompt which is building a health care system then compare it to the paragraph and one will only find a long. winded and relevant introduction to the topic. Where is the reference to the question? Where is the thesis sentence? What Wewant topics are to be presented? none of the expected preliminary presentations are there. This is a half-baked draft. The writer has not considered the given topic for discussions. Rather, reasons to develop a healthcare system were provided ) which is a totally different discussion topic. As the statement is off the mark, this representation is not an accurate response or instructional outline. |
**PROMPT:
## THE CHART SHOWS EXPECTED CITY VISITS BY COUNTRY OF ORIGIN FOR 2018 (THOUSAND/YEAR)**
The given chart gives information about the travelling tendency to 4 countries of people in the USA, Canada and Mexico in the year 2018.
Overall, Marid is anticipated to be the most well-known tourist destination, on the contrary, the lowest figure belonged to Liverpool. It is also apparent that there will be a significant disparity in the number of travelers to the capital of France.
According to the current predictions, there will be numerous American visitors in Madrid(100 thousand), compared to the figure for Canadian and Mexican, with 80 thousand and nearly 70 thousand respectively. Similarly, the number of Americans having a trip to Liverpool is likely to stand at somewhere in the vicinity of 50 thousand, which is double and triple as much as the quantity of Canada and Mexico.
Looking at the graph more detail, the year 2008 is estimated to witness an equal number of citizens in these 3 countries travelling to Paris (above 600 thousand). Meanwhile, the figure for Rome is predicted to have the biggest difference among 3 nations, to be specific, there will be approximately 80 thousand American residents compared with just 50 thousand and 20 thousand visitors from Canada and Mexico respectively.
Thank you for your help!
* | The given chart
What type of chart? Specific image indicators add clarity to the presentation. It helps with a better understanding of the up and coming comparison report.
4 countries
Summarized as? The summary overview must always give the important data in run-down form. The reader relies on this for quick reference clarity.
It is also apparent
Unnecessary. The immediate important information pertain to measurement highs and lows. Medians are best used as comparison markers in the report itself.
\* Missing are the measurement type and comparison basis ( measured for the whole year) to complete the summary paragraph.
Avoid presenting numerical data in parenthesis when it is not done for the other measurement presentations. Uniformly compare the information instead. |
*Topic:
**Some people think that hard work and determination bring success. Others think other factors such as money and good appearance are more important.***
## Discuss both views and give your opinion.[/i]
Essay:
It is true that hard work and determination are two key factors to get success in life, whereas, some people do believe that money and good appearance play more important roles. While all these are necessary, I would strongly agree that hard work is definitely the most essential factor for those who wish to achieve success.
On the one hand, it is undoubtledy that things like money, wealth and smart appearance are considered to be vital in bringing success at work as well as in daily life.
Firstly, jobs such as bank officers or flight attendants do require people with good-looking outward aspects such as smart face, beautiful smile or the average height. There is an online survey conducted by students in the University of Economics Ho Chi Minh city that people with good appearance tend to have more job opportunities than people who do not. Besides, money or wealthy is also a vital factor in order to \*\*get a head in life.\*\* Pretending that you are a start-up, your priority now is marketing your business to potential partners as well as target customers. Without money, it seems to be extremely difficult to \*\*develop contacts\*\* with rich and influential people or hiring KOLs (Key Opinion Leaders) and famous people to advertise your brand.
On the other hand, comparing to money and appearance, hard work and determination are so far the most value elements in seeking for success and recognition.
There is one famous sentence :"Genius only has 1% talent, 99% is hard work". If you have 100$ but no dedication and no laboriousness, that 100$ will be gone. However, if you have 10$ but 100% hard work and studiousness, you will raise that 10$ to 100$ and even 100 million dollars.
From a perspective of the employers, the employees with good and hard-working performances will obviously have more promotion opportunities and high wages comparing to others.
In conclusion, as money and smart appearance are so precious in modern world, hard work is, in my opinion, the most important. | It is true
This creates a problem with the orginal topic rephrasing. There is no question being asked of the writer in terms of statement veracity. Such a response is therefore, misplaced in the presentation. As this is most likely the personal opinion of the author, such a belief should be witten into the thesis response instead. That is, it must be integrated into the personal opinion section of the paragraph.Its current placement alters the given topic, forcing points reduction for the paragraph.
On the one hand
On the other hand
Stand- alone sentence presentations will not add to the score as these do not follow the paragraph presentation requirements. Blend these points of new into the actual reasoning paragraphs.
There is one famous sentence
Unless you can explain the relevance of this to the public opinion, it adds confusion rather than clarity to the statement. |
## Analysis of The bar chart
The bar chart illustrates the number of people who were employed in three different sectors of the economy in the UK. The graph is calibrated in the percentage of 11- year period.
Overall, what stands out from the graph is that both public and self-employed sectors had upward trends over time whereas significant downward trends can be seen in the private sector.
Regarding the employment rate of the private sector, nearly 50% of the population was working in private sectors in 2000 but then gradually declined to just under 30% in 2008. Then employment rate hit the trough in 2010 and became the least employed sector of the year compared to other fields.
As for the public section, the percentage of employment reached at 40 in the first three years and inclined to nearly 50% in 2003. Despite having slight fluctuation, the figure hit the peak at over 50 per cent. Similarly, if we look at the self-employed sector, under 20 per cent of people worked in this field in the first 2 years and it roughly fluctuated and stabled at estimately 30 percent in 2010.
* | bar chart
Incorrect image identifier. The image is a line graph. Points will be deducted for summary image inaccuracy.
11- year period.
From when to when? The summary overview is becoming less accurate with every sentence written and presented.
what stands out from the graph
Coherence issue in relation to the image identifier. This will cause several preliminary scoring deductions. Use a uniform image identifier. Preciseness is key to avoiding deductions in a Task 1 essay.
but then gradually
Should be presented as a seperate idea in the paragraph to help differentiate the information. A seperate sentence can be used to add cohesiveness to the report.
Similarly
There is nothing similar about the comparison data Wrong word usage. There is no proper comparison point presented. |
**Topic: Students today can easily access information online, so libraries are no longer necessary.**
## Do you agree or disagree?
The advancement of technology in recent decades has digitalized almost every human activity. In the light of this, many argue that libraries are outdated, and therefore, unfit for the demanding needs of the modern world. While I agree that the Internet is a powerful tool when it comes to information provision, I believe that libraries have their own importance in providing resources.
Admittedly, there are several reasons why people are in favor of searching information online over the traditional method of going to libraries. Firstly, in terms of time efficiency, the Internet allows us to access information at any time when it is convenient while libraries are only open for a certain number of hours a day and several days a week. People can also save a huge amount of time traveling as everything now is just one click away with the availability of online searching tools. Furthermore, the Internet is a reservoir of knowledge that is greater than any physical library, and it is getting updated every second. Therefore, to those who just need to get information in the fastest and easiest way, the Internet should be enough.
However, I believe that physical libraries still have special features that online sources can never replace. One of the key objectives of libraries is that it provides spaces which are specialized for studying. Particularly, every library has an academic environment with a quiet ambiance and less distraction to encourage deep concentration. This explains why many students still go to libraries to prepare for exams these days. In addition, people can always rest assured with the accuracy of the information they collected from libraries as books before being displaced in there have undergone strict processes of censoring by the ministry of education, and thus, it can be used officially for academic purposes or even scientific research.
In conclusion, although there are more and more alternative ways to attain information in this days and ages, I contend that libraries will still exist in the future for its unique value. | While I agree that ...I believe that libraries have their own importance in providing resources.
The opinion of the writer is unclear. Do you agree or disagree? The response can only support one opinion. As this is not an extent statement, a deque based response cannot be used. The essay has failed at this point. A passing preliminary score cannot be awarded due to a lack of opinion clarity as indicated in the discussion qquestion. The second failure reason is the way the response is deemed incorrect based on the required answer format.
However
Nope. The essay score will be based on a single - reason. The problem, is that there is no clear opinion provided. The essay is not headed towards a passing mark at this point. |
***Parents should not pressure their children to choose a particular profession. Young people should have the freedom to choose a career path they like.***
## To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is widely admissible that children should not be imposed on which career path they are going to follow. Some parents do not agree with this opinion due to the fact that they know their children best. However, I totally believe that it is student's freedom to decide their own college majors and occupational choices.
To begin with, various teenagers have distinctive abilities. A number of them may have a head for numbers, statistics or figures, on the contrary others can be good at drawing, singing or dancing. Sometimes these aptitudes happen to appear at an early age among juveniles, for most cases they are not instantly recognizable though until they enter high schools. With busy work schedules, parents barely have time to pay much attention to their children, therefore, it is only the children who know explicitly about their strengths and weaknesses. Furthermore, parents are frequently affected by old-fashioned conceptions, especially those coming from Asian countries like China, Korea, Vietnam or Japan. They want their offspring to fit the conventional stereotype of a doctor, a teacher or an engineer. This will have an adverse effect on the teenagers in light of the fact that not everyone is cut out for these careers, they can end up becoming insecure about themselves. Each individual has a field that they are confident in and only them will know what their potentials and values are.
Besides, every child has its own interest and passion. Doing something you like is always more inspiring and appealing than something you dislike. Consistency is a key to success, consequently if someone feels unmotivated about the vocations they are doing, how can they stick to it and give their best performance? A recent survey has shown that over 30 percent of workers in the US left their current office as they want to start over with their favorite ones. This is a wake-up call for all parents as jumping from one job to another is not ideal since anyone can possibly lose the perfect opportunity to move up the career ladder.
In conclusion, I would say desire and talent play a crucial role in everyone's success. That's why every father and mother ought to be more open-minded and accept their children's choices.
Please give feedbacks on my writing. I would appreciate it. | due to the fact that they know their children best.
This is a topic reason deviation. It is not supported in the orginal statement. It has altered the original topic proposal because the writer chose to provide a prisonal opinion in the restatement. By beginning the reasoning discussion too early, he has forced a restatement failure, even as the opinion placement is correct in format. The first paragraph may have difficulty achieving a passing consideration in the preliminary stage.
how can they stick to it and give their best performance?
Avoid rhetorical questions such as these. The reason stating a response to the qquestion creates a score lowering topic alteration. Stick to related statements instead.
A recent survey
To make this seem less researched, use the word "public" since researched data cannot be cited in the presentation. |