line
stringlengths 2
76
|
---|
which stood the old woman’s bed and chest of drawers and into which he
|
had never looked before. These two rooms made up the whole flat.
|
“What do you want?” the old woman said severely, coming into the room
|
and, as before, standing in front of him so as to look him straight in
|
the face.
|
“I’ve brought something to pawn here,” and he drew out of his pocket
|
an old-fashioned flat silver watch, on the back of which was engraved a
|
globe; the chain was of steel.
|
“But the time is up for your last pledge. The month was up the day
|
before yesterday.”
|
“I will bring you the interest for another month; wait a little.”
|
“But that’s for me to do as I please, my good sir, to wait or to sell
|
your pledge at once.”
|
“How much will you give me for the watch, Alyona Ivanovna?”
|
“You come with such trifles, my good sir, it’s scarcely worth anything.
|
I gave you two roubles last time for your ring and one could buy it
|
quite new at a jeweler’s for a rouble and a half.”
|
“Give me four roubles for it, I shall redeem it, it was my father’s. I
|
shall be getting some money soon.”
|
“A rouble and a half, and interest in advance, if you like!”
|
“A rouble and a half!” cried the young man.
|
“Please yourself”--and the old woman handed him back the watch. The
|
young man took it, and was so angry that he was on the point of going
|
away; but checked himself at once, remembering that there was nowhere
|
else he could go, and that he had had another object also in coming.
|
“Hand it over,” he said roughly.
|
The old woman fumbled in her pocket for her keys, and disappeared behind
|
the curtain into the other room. The young man, left standing alone in
|
the middle of the room, listened inquisitively, thinking. He could hear
|
her unlocking the chest of drawers.
|
“It must be the top drawer,” he reflected. “So she carries the keys in
|
a pocket on the right. All in one bunch on a steel ring.... And there’s
|
one key there, three times as big as all the others, with deep notches;
|
that can’t be the key of the chest of drawers... then there must be some
|
other chest or strong-box... that’s worth knowing. Strong-boxes always
|
have keys like that... but how degrading it all is.”
|
The old woman came back.
|
“Here, sir: as we say ten copecks the rouble a month, so I must take
|
fifteen copecks from a rouble and a half for the month in advance. But
|
for the two roubles I lent you before, you owe me now twenty copecks
|
on the same reckoning in advance. That makes thirty-five copecks
|
altogether. So I must give you a rouble and fifteen copecks for the
|
watch. Here it is.”
|
“What! only a rouble and fifteen copecks now!”
|
“Just so.”
|
The young man did not dispute it and took the money. He looked at the
|
old woman, and was in no hurry to get away, as though there was still
|
something he wanted to say or to do, but he did not himself quite know
|
what.
|
“I may be bringing you something else in a day or two, Alyona
|
Ivanovna--a valuable thing--silver--a cigarette-box, as soon as I get it
|
back from a friend...” he broke off in confusion.
|
“Well, we will talk about it then, sir.”
|
“Good-bye--are you always at home alone, your sister is not here with
|
you?” He asked her as casually as possible as he went out into the
|
passage.
|
“What business is she of yours, my good sir?”
|
“Oh, nothing particular, I simply asked. You are too quick.... Good-day,
|
Alyona Ivanovna.”
|
Raskolnikov went out in complete confusion. This confusion became more
|
and more intense. As he went down the stairs, he even stopped short, two
|
or three times, as though suddenly struck by some thought. When he was
|
in the street he cried out, “Oh, God, how loathsome it all is! and
|
can I, can I possibly.... No, it’s nonsense, it’s rubbish!” he added
|
resolutely. “And how could such an atrocious thing come into my head?
|
What filthy things my heart is capable of. Yes, filthy above all,
|
disgusting, loathsome, loathsome!--and for a whole month I’ve been....”
|
But no words, no exclamations, could express his agitation. The feeling
|
of intense repulsion, which had begun to oppress and torture his heart
|
while he was on his way to the old woman, had by now reached such a
|
pitch and had taken such a definite form that he did not know what to
|
do with himself to escape from his wretchedness. He walked along the
|
pavement like a drunken man, regardless of the passers-by, and jostling
|
against them, and only came to his senses when he was in the next
|
street. Looking round, he noticed that he was standing close to a tavern
|