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matters is that people would remember it, and that would give them
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a clue. For this business one should be as little conspicuous as
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possible.... Trifles, trifles are what matter! Why, it’s just such
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trifles that always ruin everything....”
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He had not far to go; he knew indeed how many steps it was from the gate
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of his lodging house: exactly seven hundred and thirty. He had counted
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them once when he had been lost in dreams. At the time he had put no
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faith in those dreams and was only tantalising himself by their hideous
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but daring recklessness. Now, a month later, he had begun to look upon
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them differently, and, in spite of the monologues in which he jeered at
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his own impotence and indecision, he had involuntarily come to regard
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this “hideous” dream as an exploit to be attempted, although he
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still did not realise this himself. He was positively going now for a
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“rehearsal” of his project, and at every step his excitement grew more
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and more violent.
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With a sinking heart and a nervous tremor, he went up to a huge house
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which on one side looked on to the canal, and on the other into the
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street. This house was let out in tiny tenements and was inhabited by
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working people of all kinds--tailors, locksmiths, cooks, Germans of
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sorts, girls picking up a living as best they could, petty clerks, etc.
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There was a continual coming and going through the two gates and in the
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two courtyards of the house. Three or four door-keepers were employed on
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the building. The young man was very glad to meet none of them, and
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at once slipped unnoticed through the door on the right, and up the
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staircase. It was a back staircase, dark and narrow, but he was familiar
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with it already, and knew his way, and he liked all these surroundings:
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in such darkness even the most inquisitive eyes were not to be dreaded.
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“If I am so scared now, what would it be if it somehow came to pass that
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I were really going to do it?” he could not help asking himself as he
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reached the fourth storey. There his progress was barred by some porters
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who were engaged in moving furniture out of a flat. He knew that the
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flat had been occupied by a German clerk in the civil service, and his
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family. This German was moving out then, and so the fourth floor on this
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staircase would be untenanted except by the old woman. “That’s a good
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thing anyway,” he thought to himself, as he rang the bell of the old
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woman’s flat. The bell gave a faint tinkle as though it were made of
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tin and not of copper. The little flats in such houses always have bells
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that ring like that. He had forgotten the note of that bell, and now
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its peculiar tinkle seemed to remind him of something and to bring it
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clearly before him.... He started, his nerves were terribly overstrained
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by now. In a little while, the door was opened a tiny crack: the old
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woman eyed her visitor with evident distrust through the crack, and
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nothing could be seen but her little eyes, glittering in the darkness.
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But, seeing a number of people on the landing, she grew bolder, and
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opened the door wide. The young man stepped into the dark entry, which
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was partitioned off from the tiny kitchen. The old woman stood facing
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him in silence and looking inquiringly at him. She was a diminutive,
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withered up old woman of sixty, with sharp malignant eyes and a sharp
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little nose. Her colourless, somewhat grizzled hair was thickly smeared
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with oil, and she wore no kerchief over it. Round her thin long neck,
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which looked like a hen’s leg, was knotted some sort of flannel rag,
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and, in spite of the heat, there hung flapping on her shoulders, a mangy
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fur cape, yellow with age. The old woman coughed and groaned at every
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instant. The young man must have looked at her with a rather peculiar
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expression, for a gleam of mistrust came into her eyes again.
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“Raskolnikov, a student, I came here a month ago,” the young man made
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haste to mutter, with a half bow, remembering that he ought to be more
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polite.
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“I remember, my good sir, I remember quite well your coming here,” the
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old woman said distinctly, still keeping her inquiring eyes on his face.
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“And here... I am again on the same errand,” Raskolnikov continued, a
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little disconcerted and surprised at the old woman’s mistrust. “Perhaps
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she is always like that though, only I did not notice it the other
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time,” he thought with an uneasy feeling.
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The old woman paused, as though hesitating; then stepped on one side,
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and pointing to the door of the room, she said, letting her visitor pass
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in front of her:
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“Step in, my good sir.”
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The little room into which the young man walked, with yellow paper on
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the walls, geraniums and muslin curtains in the windows, was brightly
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lighted up at that moment by the setting sun.
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“So the sun will shine like this _then_ too!” flashed as it were by
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chance through Raskolnikov’s mind, and with a rapid glance he scanned
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everything in the room, trying as far as possible to notice and
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remember its arrangement. But there was nothing special in the room. The
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furniture, all very old and of yellow wood, consisted of a sofa with
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a huge bent wooden back, an oval table in front of the sofa, a
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dressing-table with a looking-glass fixed on it between the windows,
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chairs along the walls and two or three half-penny prints in yellow
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frames, representing German damsels with birds in their hands--that was
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all. In the corner a light was burning before a small ikon. Everything
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was very clean; the floor and the furniture were brightly polished;
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everything shone.
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“Lizaveta’s work,” thought the young man. There was not a speck of dust
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to be seen in the whole flat.
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“It’s in the houses of spiteful old widows that one finds such
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cleanliness,” Raskolnikov thought again, and he stole a curious glance
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at the cotton curtain over the door leading into another tiny room, in
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