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Ever since I was revived people ask me what it was like to be dead.
I just say it was painless and peaceful - why worry anyone with the truth?
I was eating an apple, but by the time I realised it was too late
It was a mealy apple
My two years old son constantly cried on seeing the new painting of a child I bought recently.
This morning, I woke up to find my son missing; but why is his favourite teddy bear in the hands of the child in that painting?
I always enjoyed hunting with my dad growing up; the tracking, the stalking, working together to line up the perfect shot.
Every time I got a new stepmom, I knew it was only a matter of time before he'd get bored with her, and the hunt would be on again!
While my friends and I were hanging out, Janet took a pill her psychiatrist perscribed her to deal with the hallucinations of people mocking her.
Next thing we knew, Dave vanished before our eyes.
AITA for choosing my dog over my wife?
I was hungry and I've known that dog my whole life
Despite her being buried years ago, I received a letter from my grandmother this morning.
"See you tonight, my sweet grandchild," it read, the text written in what looked disturbingly like old, dried blood.
In the eerie moonlight, a horse with gnarled hands pedaled through the silent town, its unsettling gaze fixed on unsuspecting souls.
The chilling sound of hoofbeats blended with the creaking of the bike, a haunting symphony signaling doom to those who dared cross its path.
Itu2019s been 24 hours since the scientific breakthrough removed pride from all living humans.
If I had more time, to adjust to the new world, Iu2019d have thought twice when my parents said they were proud of me.
"Open the door," I ordered my flesh golem.
I found out too late that my Apprentice had changed the golem's vocabulary, so that "the door" translated to "my heart"
Everyone thinks
Everyone thinks I'm only with him for the money.The truth is, I know what happens behind closed doors and I have to be here to protect my son.
Here on the Philippines, people say you can get taller by jumping on New Year's Eve.
I didn't believe it until I saw my brother jumped out from his chair and saw his elongated neck hanged.
When my wife came inside from the garden, there was dirt under her fingernails.
I guess I should have used a coffin after all.
I turned off the light and ran up the stairs like I usually do.
I felt a grip around my ankle and watched as the top of the stairs grew further and further away.
Being an archeologist in 2934 is fun!
Recently we came upon these deep holes with yellow barrels in them and are planning to check what was left behind tomorrow.
There was a knock at the door
I wondered why the girl in the oven wasnu2019t dead yet.
I had trouble finding the bathroom at a new coworkers home during the staff Christmas party.
Accidentally walked into his bedroom where, on the nightstand, sat a photo of me.
"Delicious meals guaranteed to convert you to vegetarianism," the ad said.
I was chowing down hungrily until i found a tiny eyeball and a barely formed hand in one of the dumplings.
For years, lightly patting or scratching my arms was enough to manage my anxiety.
But after a particularly horrible day, I pulled out the electric cheese grater.
I grew up in a very religious household and refused to listen to my parents warnings about masturbation
Now as I write this, I can barely see the screen and the hair on my fingertips is making it hard to tpye.
I listened intently to ascertain the reason for my unusual mid-night awakening, staring into the unmoving darkness.
It was the shallow whisper of another's breathing that ensured I would not be returning to sleep.
As I stared at my drowned, lifeless body lying on the beach I came to the slow realisation that I was dead.
It was weeks though before I realised the true horror of being a ghost marooned alone on an uninhabited island.
she was walking barefoot in her backyard when the neighbor peeked from behind the fence and locked eyes with her, except that, the house next door has been locked for years and no one lives in it.
I'm laying in bed at home days after shoulder surgery and my sling feels a little tight on my neck.
I go to adjust it and feel it get tighter as I hear a quiet hiss come from near my head.
I hid from the fleshy monstrosity the librarian had created to protect us.
I tried to stay calm as it passed me, hoping itu2019s powerful senses of smell and hearing would be hit by the librarian and his burned flesh, until I realized it could see.
The little girl would flinch as her mother threw insults to her,
She looked at her mother as she mouthed to her "Look at the camera".
I loved my job on the force, being a skulldozer.
That was until I was called into duty against 4 masked clowns robbing a bank.
He was so badly beaten, he didnu2019t notice that I entered the room until I was by his side.
Fortunately for me, he also hasnu2019t noticed that Iu2019m not his nurse.
I laughed as my sister ran and shrieked when I turned the hosepipe onto her.
But the shrieking turned into screaming as her skin began to blister.
Ever since I let my dog out that night she hasnu2019t been the same.
And now sheu2019s been smiling at me.
They said: "When people die, some of them go to hell."
Since they told me about my father's suicide, I know some of them leave it.
I was watching TV
A SCARY SHOW COMES ON
The sudden disappearance of all the ocean water puzzled everyone on Earth.
But what truly disturbed us was the sight of the formerly submerged ground, now uncovered, moving up and down like a breathing organism's skin.
I shifted nervously in my chair as I waited to meet the new boss in our building.
My body froze as I shook the hand of my grandfather whose been dead for ten years.
Iu2019ve always enjoyed the sweet sounds of the piano drifting from my neighbor's house, offering solace in my loneliest nights.
That comfort turned into a nightmare when I found out my neighbor had died years ago, and I was living next to an abandoned house.
All the demons on earth were to be exorcised at noon.
When the clock hit home, my childhood best friend grinned at me and vanished.
I was told the room was completely empty, so I walked in unafraid.
It was ***completely*** empty.
Rewinding the recording, I watched the victims alight back onto the fourteenth-story balcony and turn to face the camera, before I pressed the play button again.
u201cOkay, TikTok, today weu2019re doing a completely new challenge!u201d the little boys announced, cheerfully flapping their cardboard wings.
The company I work for has a mole.
But yesterday, I think I heard its babies crawl into my ear.
There is so much lightning as if it were a photoshoot outside- I texted my friend from the neighborhood.
There is no storm outside - he texted back.
My daughter looked terrified, pointing to the thing in her closet behind me.
But what frightened me the most was the terrified face of the beast looking at my daughter behind me.
u2018Scientists rally as global temperatures reach new low of 5 c u00b0u2019
Tearing that page of newspaper out, I threw it and my last log of wood on the bin fire.
I was really hungry so I ordered food through an app.
The taxi didn't take long to arrive.
"Look at this cool mirror I found next to this tree, mommy!" my daughter shouted at me from afar.
When I got there, I completely froze after realising that when I moved my right arm, the reflection moved its right arm as well.
I went pale
I begged the man to stop syphoning my blood as my consciousness slipped away.
Me and my husband wanted to try and spice things up a little bit.
So we installed a glory hole in our bathroom and 3 minutes into the blowjob my husband walks into the room.
I awoke in a haze, and a nurse near to my face said, u201cMr. Smith, your transformation was successful and your new breasts and vagina are beautiful.u201d
I looked down in horror at my bruised and bloodied chest and at the two gigantic tits that now reposed there, and the vagina where my dick and balls once wereu2014I was here for a prostate procedure.
I loved making sandcastles with dad.
It was the next day I learned mom hated that when I found the urn to be glued shut.
I just beat my killstreak record of 13 kills
but what's a "multiplayer shooter game"
"POV: Your about to commit the most devious act ever ud83dude08" the caption read on TikTok.
I starred in horror as watched the content of the video, it having shown me laying obliviously on my bed infront of the window the video had been taken from.
As I sit in my bunker waiting I can hear the growls of the infected.
Why did those bastards at Extran Labs have to study was to make super soldiers.
I know that if I piss blood, that's probably a sign I should go see a doctor.
But what am I supposed to do if it has eyes?
After reading Frankenstein and seeing how intelligent the monster grows, as the scientist despises him more and more, but still fears him, I wondered.
Does God not stop us because we evolved to become as intelligent as we are?
When I came back from the office she kissed me and asked me what I would like for dinner
For a split second I wondered how she could see me before I saw her lifeless body lying in the garage
Felt absolute horror when I woke up with every part of my body sore and hurting with no memory of the last 72 hours.
Imagine the horror, when, thanks to hypnosis, I actually started to remember what had actually happened to me.
The year is 2053, so many things have changed including using human meat to feed the masses.
"How to they even get people into the slaughter house," I wonder as I step into my self driving car.
And there I was, breathless after my first time, smiling, my heart still racing, my mind wondering what she is thinking....
but sadly, I will never know what she is thinking, she have been dead for 8 hours now, still fresh enough, i will let my soul penetrate her, bringing life into her cold body, one last time.
I've done it, I saved the world
But they don't believe me, they just keep shoving me back into this white room.
As i watched my son make his final death wish i laughed since such a wish will never come true.
Turns out the wish has come true, now that the world is ending i realise that being omnipotent is not fit for a 12 year old child
We set up a dream watching machine to see what nightmares the patient kept having.
We became alarmed when they began to step out of the screen.
"Everyone Pretend to be dead" I shouted at my family members while running
Being the only one who watches the discovery Channel in the family I knew this will give me enough time to escape the cougars
I curiously watch my 10 y/o order a pepper spray to ward off the 'bad man' he says has been visiting him lately at night.
"The struggle makes it all the more sweet", I chuckle to myself.
I write messages on a paper to make new friends...
...Why do they move out?
When I checked into the motel, I noticed there no towels in the bathroomu2026
I called the front desk and the manager, Norman Bates, said he would be right over.
Knocking at my front door was a mother in tears, handing out a missing persons flyer of her daughter and a police sketch of the suspect someone saw.
The nose is spot on, the glasses I wear for fun when I'm working, but I know my jawline isn't that sharp.
AITA for putting pesticides on my vegetable garden and not telling my neighbors?
I did give them fair warning in advance that something would happen to their kids if they didn't stop stealing.
My boyfriend always said he 'had that dawg in him.'
I couldn't help but think about how ironic that was as I cleaned up after my dog.
I'm an ethical vampire, which means that I only feed on people who truly don't deserve to live.
And I know what you did, you sick fuck.
The road sloped gently back and forth along gently swaying curves.
Another driver drifted peacefully to his death, and the hypnotist who designed Mercy Drive wondered how long it would take for the department of transportation to catch on and close it down.
this one dude who I never met came up to me and told me to come in his car
"good thing you're not a serial killer and rapist," I told the man who I didn't know was a serial killer and rapist
It was bad enough that my coworker pulled his pants all the way down when he used the urinal
But he also did this while peeing in the sink and holding his shirt up with his chin.
After a long day at work, I walked across the dimly lit parking lot to my car, and smiled at the tired reflection on the window
When I got into my car, I saw my wallet in the passenger seat, and felt a wave of relief that it was still there since I forgot to roll my windows up when I got to work this morning.
The men broke into my small apartment during the night.
It was only when they put me in handcuffs and I looked down at the remains of my son, that I snapped back to reality.
My wife tragically fell from a cliff on our hike some years ago
I received a package in the mailu2026it was a photo of me pushing her off
I have damning evidence that one of the cops in our town is crooked.
I'm taking this to the police chief and will edit this post with an update to let you all know the results.
The weather was amazing when me and my friends set sail that I fell asleep on the deck.
When I woke up all alone and no longer able to see land.
There are 2 ferrets.
Living in my urinal tract.
I was enjoying the show at the theater tonight
"Now theres one in the spotlight, he dont like right to me" Says the host as I am pinned against a wall.
She crouched against her front door, silver knife in white knuckles, drowning out slurred threats from an intimate stranger.
Her weary eyes rested on his urn perched atop the fireplace, that golden panopticon.
Itu2019s a good thing I learn from my mistakes
Not so good for my patients though
She always hated the way her husband breathed down her neck in his sleep and tonight it was no different.
Then she remembered that he passed away in a car crash several years ago.
I was laying in bed having a beautiful trip on 5g of mushrooms
When I heard the kitchen window shatter and deep voices hushing each other
"Silver will expose their true form," I said, to the other people at the table.
"As you can see from the test results, prolonged exposure to silver dust causes the shapeshifters' skin to turn blue!"
I watch my son excitedly unwrap his present from his auntie.
His terrified look at the gift in the box followed by him holding up the lifeless body of my sister's cat will forever haunt me.
The US has finally declared a War on Poverty.
The execution of every poor person begins tomorrow.
I cowered in fear as I helplessly watched my brother get attacked by the monster.
When they finally arrived home, my parents fervently denied this telling me "The babysitter wouldn't do that".
After only a few generations of breeding, rearing livestock had just lost its charm.
Hearing the animals shriek out and protest in their primitive languages had always been the best part of the job, made the meat taste better too, what a shame.
I awoke to the sound of my wife talking to our newborn.
It's been 6 years since her stillbirth.
"Weird," I thought as I watched my neighbor bring more grocery bags than usual into his house.
As he dropped the tampons, I wondered why he needed them if he lived there alone?
"Thank you for your order, and enjoy your meal, Ma'am", says the nice girl at the drive-thru and smiles at me when she hands over the change and the bag.
A shrill, inhuman scream emits from the top of my lungs when I open the bag and the cold dead eyes from the severed head stare at me.
We recently went on vacation for 5 days but sadly couldnu2019t find someone that would take care of our house during that time, at least my husband promised to check our security cam at the front door via livestream on his phone occasionally, just in case.
It was the 3rd day of our vacation, when we checked the livestream and saw someone knocking on the door of our house: u201ehey, open up, I can see that youu2019re homeu201c.
Never had I thought my first photo taken in a new phone my wife bought for me would be a photo of my wifeu2019s murderer taken while Iu2019m hiding in the closet.
And never had I thought this would be how I find out my wife bought the phone in Japan.
I shot my assailant in the back, surprised my bruised and battered body could lift the gun.
I looked closely at the car and saw a child run out, trying to get him to wake up, causing me to grin as I lost consciousness.
ULPT: Always keep your eyes out for homeless people welfare shelters.
You can make out a list of people who won't be missed if went missing.
I imagined what it would be like to feel her last breath against my neck as I slipped the knife through her ribs.
But I wasn't expecting her to bite me.
I thought my life was over after failing school so many times.
But then, I realized it wasn't mine that had to end.
The sub relaxed slightly, a bit surprised that her dom had agreed to insert the slimmer of the two butt plugs.
She heard an unexpected whirring sound as he walked in front of her...and was this thing inside her expanding?
"beauty is in the eye of the beholder, they said."
My self-esteem hasn't improved since I took hers for my own, though
Your biggest regrets are the things you never did.
I never did learn how to dispose of a body.
my local mcdolands is hiring
my exatment rolled away after i was hired why the "beff" was so odd