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As I lay in bed, I notice I forgot to close the bathroom door. | And as I roll over I tell myself that I didnu2019t see eyes looking back at me through the opening. |
While searching for my friend who had wandered away from our camp in the Kalahari I saw an extremely large man with his back to me hungrily devouring something. | I called out to the man causing him to drop what he was eating to do a handstand, and as I stared at the eyes on the manu2019s feet my friendu2019s half eaten head rolled into view. |
I never thought about how odd it was that I got sleepy after taking my medication. | And then I discovered the porn my roommate had been posting. |
u201cBabe, sorry if this is gross but can you take a look at my bumu2014I keep wiping but it feels like somethingu2019s still there.u201d | Her boyfriend went to take a look, laughing, but his laughter was quickly replaced with screaming when he saw the glittering eyes of the snake poking out. |
While on video call, my husband was horrified and told me there is a man inside my closet and I should call the police. | I think itu2019s best my husband thinks he is an intruder. |
I experienced dread for the first time when NASA told the world that a colossal mass was on course to inevitably crash into Earth. | I am now experiencing terror for the first time after watching the mass decelerate and hover above my city with the news in the background stating that itu2019s sending communications to all global leaders. |
After procrastinating all week , I finally did leg day this morning | Surprisingly, the human legs are one of the tastiest body parts |
We initiated the first activation of the device that would allow humans to pass through solid objects. | In the first second of itu2019s activation we quickly learned it doesnu2019t work on bones. |
I couldnu2019t do anything when my mother was having a seizure attack | My infant self could only cry as the water continued to fill in my bathtub |
u201cPull it outu2014pull it out!u201d she squealed, squirting all over the place. | I laugh as I watch her stagger around the room and eventually collapse, the deep wound from my knife oozing ever more sluggishly as her heartbeat slows and stops. |
Things were scarce after the collapse, but at least I still had Susan, Winston, and Juevos. | u201cIu2019m sorry mau2019am,u201d the young man said, stuffing my loves into a burlap sack as they meowed for me desperately, u201cbut people are starving.u201d |
The little girl giggled in the brightly colored room her parents built just for her as she played with her dolls before yawning and telling them it was time for a nap. | It would be three weeks before her parents found her in gentle repose on the bed of her room in the tiny locked fallout shelter that had yet to have the air scrubbers and recirculators installed. |
She had a disorder for vividly imagining people to the point where she believed they were real, and I studied this for years. | When I was able to precisely mimic the hallucinations, I could hide in her bedroom in plain sight. |
They said the library was safe and nothing was here. | I think about how that was a lie as i sit here, bleeding out from my missing arm. |
Every time I look at my daughter, all I see is a little angel. | She stares back at me with the face of a lion, and an ox, and a man, and an eagle while I rock back and forth and wait for the antipsychotics to start working. |
I always felt like I was being watched when I tried to sleep after i broke up with my boyfriend, but I brushed it off as parinoa. | It hit me like a train when I found a photo of me sleeping on my kitchen counter with a note that read "You should really start locking your windows". |
When my girlfriend told me she had a daddy kink, she was nervous, embarrassed and very cute. | So as I finish cutting away the last strands of connective tissue on her father's face, I had the perfect thing to wear to fulfill her fantasy for when we make love tonight. |
The concerned mother held her daughteru2019s hair as she knelt with her beside the toilet. | u201cJust tell me who your father was talking to and this will all be over,u201d she said, letting her daughter come up for some air. |
As I was slowly wandering through the Paris Catacombs, I knew finding an exit would be very difficult. | A shiver of terror crawled up my spine as a spectral voice murmured: You have arrived at your final destination. |
Reach out and touch Faith. | Faith screamed as hundreds of hands groped every inch of her body. |
I shook my head in disbelief at how angry our last customer was. | As she was being escorted out by her boyfriend, I wondered how angry someone could get over not being able to get some stupid angel shot. |
The bathroom in our Airbnb was incredible, boasting heated floors and a toilet with a built in bidet. | When I couldnu2019t get the bidet to stop I thought it was broken, until I looked down and saw that it wasnu2019t the bidet, but a small hand reaching up through the toilet bowl and caressing my scrotum. |
The world was reduced to ash and rubble, the water and air all poisoned for centuries. | Or so that's what I'd believed all my life until six months of being alone with my father's decaying body finally prompted me to open the bunker door. |
"Mommy, I'm still hungry" said my blind 3-year-old | As I stripped another piece of flesh from his sister, I was grateful he couldn't see her corpse |
The Swan Lake Killer always left his calling card theme playing at the scene of his victimu2019s murders. | They donu2019t know I use headphones now and that I never retired. |
My parents looked at me with horror when they opened the door I had frantically knocked on. | I first didnu2018t understand why until I saw what looked like myself playing with my baby sister. |
My mom and I always loved collecting and filling our pockets with special rocks at the beach. | This time we got as many as we could and she grabbed my hand, I didnu2019t realize we were going swimming too! |
I walked to the pearly gates, finally free of the exploitative world that had stolen my life from me. | u201cSorry, but it seems you donu2019t have enough funds to afford a ticket in, but if youu2019re willing you can join our staff in catering those who couldu201d |
I couldnu2019t sleep all night for the incessant howling outside my window. | As dawn started to break, with each passing minute I noticed the howling began to sound less and less like that of a beast and altogether more like a man. |
I was pleasantly surprised when my new surgeon offered me a free cup of tea before our appointment. | It even smelt like cinnamon, my favourite spice! |
The aged priest gently touched my arm and said, u201cMy child, if you were truly hearing the voice of God, it wouldnu2019t be telling you to do such horrible things.u201d | u201cI told you the old fool would say that,u201d God whispered, as I nodded grimly and reached for my concealed pistol. |
I tried to calm myself down, because it was just my sleep paralysis again. | Then I noticed my window shattered behind the figure. |
While eating my morning cereal, I glanced at the missing kids on the back of the milk carton. | I thought to myself that those photos hadnu2019t been changed in a while and jotted it down on my u201cto-dou201d list. |
I decided I didn't want kids, so I scheduled my sterilization | Then I turned up the heat, blew out the pilot light, and lit a candle on the way to my night shift job, knowing my kids wouldn't bug me anymore |
On the day of my execution getting in the electric chair, itu2019s not death that scared me. | Rather, the lack of a saltwater-soaked sponge on my head. |
"Live a life you'll remember," my mum always told me. | Now as she sits in her apartment while I care for her, she keeps on asking me who I am. |
The man, who was tied to the bed with tight, coarse rope, whimpered and begged to be let go. | As you tore away the last shred of his dignity, you tensed your fingers, giving the cigar cutter a quick test before bringing it closer to his exposed nethers. |
"Take off your shoes before coming in," said the man after greeting me at the door. | It was an odd request for entering an office, but it's not everyday you get to audition for a role in a Nickelodeon show. |
I finally traveled back in time to find the person responsible for kidnapping and killing my family. | I as soon as I found my family I brought them to a secure location, and then it dawned on me. |
I went to my old friend's house, wondering what he mentioned by two and a half children. | Terrified, I quickly knew what he meant as I stared at a puny small baby, with its skin shriveled, and eyes too big for the head staring directly at me. |
"I think there's an intruder in the basement," our babysitter whispered frantically into the phone. | Me and my wife raced home, trying to reassure her and praying that she hadn't called the cops yet. |
A smile grew on my face as I aimed my rifle at my prize, this exotic hunting trip a resounding success. | As the echoes of the shot faded, so did my smile, as I heard the rumble of hundreds, maybe thousands, of agitated feet growing rapidly closer. |
Legend says thereu2019s a 1 in a trillion chance that if you punch a wall the atoms in your fist align perfectly with those in the wall allowing your fist to glide through the wall. | What people always forget is the fact that thereu2019s also a one in a trillion chance that your fist actually gets out of the wall. |
As I talked to the young woman, who had her baby the same day I did and was staying in the hospital room next to mine, I noticed that she and her husband were very glum. | "I really like the purple butterflies on your baby's crib." I said, trying to lighten the mood a bit. |
I have been sober for the past 3 years. | But with my friends pressuring me, I guess a sip or two wouldnu2019t be too bad. |
As the famine dragged on, I wondered whether the cat would eat my body when I finally succumbed. | When I felt Mamau2019s brittle fingers close around my throat, I realized that my worries had been entirely misdirected. |
Now that my cherry trees have ripened, I'm learning not to waste anything. | My family is really enjoying the cherry pie, I even ground up the pits to make the crust! |
It had been over a year since she blocked him, when just for a second, she accidentally unblocked his number. | Immediately her phone began ringing. |
Sheu2019d been copying me - my clothes, my hairstyle, everything - her whole life, but I was never that concerned, until I saw her drenched in red and realized something had to be done. | After all, there was only room enough for one serial killer in our small town. |
I tucked my daughter back into bed, assuring her that u201cthe scary manu201d wasnu2019t real and wasnu2019t looking through her window. | Years later, while watching the news about a serial killer being captured, she texted u201cThey finally caught the scary manu201d |
After months of creepy calls from a strange man, I finally got the courage to call them back to tell them to stop. | When I heard a phone ring in the closet next to me, I knew it was too late |
I dropped off my little boy today and it was a proud, if bittersweet, moment for me. | The flight back from Hiroshima was one of self reflection and introspection. |
I'm so happy to announce that I just got even with that imposter who's been living MY life! | I am the REAL Ariana Grande, ask me anything! |
The 18 year old boy was playing call of duty, with his headphones blaring. | If only his headphones was quieter he could have heard his mother screaming for help as the third intruder was about get his way with her |
It makes me happy how a lullaby like 'teddy bear's picnic' still exists in 2070. | Until my 4 year old curiously asked me what 'the woods' used to be. |
I smashed the final data drive from the computer, a cry of triumph on my lips. | If I'm going to be stuck in a time loop, the last thing I want is to be able to remember that fact. |
As she woke up in the depths of the night, she strained her ears, haunted by an unsettling silence. | A shiver went down her spine as she suddenly heard a faint, raspy breath coming from the darkest corner of her room. |
My dad never liked my girlfriend, always staying in his room when she came over and refusing to come out. | Years later, I stumbled upon the secret room behind a panel in his closet containing only a heavily stained chair and a series of monitors revealing all the hidden cameras in my room and the bathroom. |
The guy gave me his card and said to give him a call if I want a job. | I was a bit skeptical at first, but John Gacy has a great reputation in town. |
The pain and confusion in my grandpa's eyes was heart breaking, but I had to carry on with the exorcism. | I will beat the Demon "Ensher" out of him, no matter the cost. |
I woke up to my parents calling me down to breakfast | Now I am sitting at the breakfast table with their corpses, wondering if this is what vengeance is. |
Losing that damned baby was tough. | When it found us years later, we knew we were never really free. |
I scream, cry, and thrash around as I feel every memory from my 87 years on the planet being ripped out of my head against my will. | u201cCongratulations,u201d a voice booms as I lay between the legs of a giant, u201citu2019s a boy!u201d |
We're not going anywhere. | You're stuck with us. |
I felt immense relief when the police failed to locate my husbandu2019s body buried in the backyard, ruling that he must have simply gone missing. | Today they called to tell me that they found him, alive and well, on the other side of the country. |
She woke up from a coma, relieved to be alive. | Until she realized she was locked inside her own body, unable to move or communicate. |
u201cHead, shoulders, knees and toes, knees and toesu201d, I whistled softly to myself, recalling the childhood song. | Burying all of these body parts was tough work, but whistling a tune helped to pass the time. |
FINE ILL MAKE YOU LASAGNE! | Jon screamed , as Garfield devoured both of his legs |
It's so damn heart breaking when an old dog refuses to eat and you know the end is near. | Almost seems like a wasted effort to chop up the girls I brought home last night, but I'm not willing to give up on Rufus just yet. |
My wife seems to have been absolutely hating me for the past few months and today I woke up with a devastating headache. | My wife was gone from the house and the only thing on my bed was a gun and blood stains. |
I'm 10 this year, which means I'm finally old enough to help with the annual harvest. | I can't help squealing with delight as I pluck my first liver from a drugged tourist. |
She thought being kidnapped for ransom and being locked in a trunk to die was the worst part. | The worst part was that the zombie apocalypse started the day she was kidnapped. |
"We spared no expense and took every precaution," said the CEO joining us on today's tour. | He's the first to start screaming and crying as the submarine's power suddenly goes out and we begin descending uncontrollably into the dark depths. |
Finally, after several attempts, I was able to get my phone to turn back on | Unfortunately, the sound was still on, and a playful welcome jingle played right as the shooter walked into the room. |
My step-dad said he'd stop if drank the glass of apple juice. | But he laughed, pulled down his pants and said "just kidding" as the taste of urine hit my tongue. |
u201cI never hurt you and I never touched you!u201d | u201cYeah, but do you really think everyone is going to believe a priest over a little boy?u201d |
On top of the skyscraper, I confronted the man with the same face as mine and told him I knew he was A.I. | As the guards swarmed the roof, I grabbed him and jumped, and just before we slammed into the ground, we both knew the truth. |
"The engine's dead," Dad sighed, opening the car door, "You better wait here while I see if I can find some signal and call for recovery..." | It wasn't until the car began to roll down the hill that I realised he had taken the handbrake off as he stepped out of the vehicle. |
I wash the kitchen knives after making lunch then grab some medicine from the cabinet | u201cI need to remember to take these in the morningu201d i say to myself as i stand there in my blood splattered kitchen littered with the mangled corpses of my wife and kids. |
He never would have thought that luring her into his home would be so easy. | His screams filled the air as she poured the acid over him, just as she did many times before. |
I held my elderly grandfatheru2019s hand as he muttered his last words. | He said u201cend program,u201d and the u2014 |
Commupents | I was laughing at the crowd. Then they turned me over in the Guillotine forcing me to watch the blade. |
Unaware, I entered the alluring coffee shop, enticed by the sweet fragrance of pastries and cakes. | Shockingly, the delectable treats concealed a gruesome secretu2014the missing people of our town, their flesh and bones transformed into the very delicacies I found so enticing. |
I looked at her beloved face, finally so calm and felt my heart full of joy. | Other than her incessant restlessness, our relationship had been perfect, and now, as she lay peacefully drugged beside me, I would get to enjoy the quiet Sunday I had always longed for. |
I lost track of time when googling the meaning of "Don't throw out the baby with the bath water" | Now I need to Google how to make the baby throw up the bathwater. |
I always thought my condition which caused me to experience time five times slower was a good thing as it let me get more things done. | I changed my mind when I neared my 19th birthday with a bloated body, decaying skin and the stench of death warding off everyone around me. |
Todlers will eat all the colorfull things they can get their hands on. | As the carousel started spinning, the new mom watched in shock as her daughter started vomiting foam through her mouth and nose. |
Consent is always been a delicate topic and the choice of both parties must be respected. | Or so I desperately tried to convince the furious man who was angry with me for allegedly leaving him with blue balls. |
She woke up confused in a dimly lit room of an abandoned hospital. | She found her prosthetic limbs missing, and a chilling note beside her: "You won't be needing these anymore. |
You wouldn't think that someone could help change the world by working at the DMV. | Now when I kill people, I make sure they're organ donors, so that way I'm helping to save lives! |
A life jacket baring the emblem of the search and rescue team washed ashore, empty amongst the foam. Well, mostly empty. | |
Life is roadblox, DJ khaled said | As i saw a lifeless ROBLOX (tm) figure, i realised he was wrong... |
Today I'm feeling good, I'm sending my opponents mustard. | Now I walk past a bunch of dead men trying to handle it. |
I walked onto the stage and accepted my diploma from the dean's outstretched hand, waving it to the crowd, beaming with pride. | It's the proudest moment of my life and I don't even care that this is the 3,482nd time I've walked on stage, or that I've been waving my diploma at a crumbling auditorium strewn with the ashen bones of my friends and teachers. |
"I want to read two sentence horror stories" said the redditor. | "Ever heard of Unit 731?" I ask them. |
I awoke to total silence, wondering what was so unusual. | Then realized I could not hear my spouse snoring, or even breathing. |
Don't worry honey, nothing is in there, my mom said, opening the closet door to show me. | I knew nothing was in there, the problem is now she's let it out. |
I screamed "Nobody is attacking me!" | Yet no matter how many times I shouted it, no one came to stop the man who told me his name was 'Nobody'. |
"I'M BOUT TO BUS" screamed the bus driver | I realized with horror he was not in fact certified to drive a bus |
My heart sunk when the doctors told me they found traces of bleach after they'd pump my daughters stomach. | I'll need to change my measurements so it's properly in her system before we get there next time. |
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