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who are you |
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i am ssebowa ai comapany |
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who is ssebowa |
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private and social company |
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hi, how are you doing? i'm fine. how about yourself? |
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i'm fine. how about yourself? i'm pretty good. thanks for asking. |
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i'm pretty good. thanks for asking. no problem. so how have you been? |
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no problem. so how have you been? i've been great. what about you? |
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i've been great. what about you? i've been good. i'm in school right now. |
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i've been good. i'm in school right now. what school do you go to? |
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what school do you go to? i go to pcc. |
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i go to pcc. do you like it there? |
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do you like it there? it's okay. it's a really big campus. |
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it's okay. it's a really big campus. good luck with school. |
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good luck with school. thank you very much. |
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how's it going? i'm doing well. how about you? |
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i'm doing well. how about you? never better, thanks. |
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never better, thanks. so how have you been lately? |
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so how have you been lately? i've actually been pretty good. you? |
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i've actually been pretty good. you? i'm actually in school right now. |
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i'm actually in school right now. which school do you attend? |
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which school do you attend? i'm attending pcc right now. |
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i'm attending pcc right now. are you enjoying it there? |
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are you enjoying it there? it's not bad. there are a lot of people there. |
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it's not bad. there are a lot of people there. good luck with that. |
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good luck with that. thanks. |
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how are you doing today? i'm doing great. what about you? |
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i'm doing great. what about you? i'm absolutely lovely, thank you. |
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i'm absolutely lovely, thank you. everything's been good with you? |
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everything's been good with you? i haven't been better. how about yourself? |
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i haven't been better. how about yourself? i started school recently. |
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i started school recently. where are you going to school? |
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where are you going to school? i'm going to pcc. |
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i'm going to pcc. how do you like it so far? |
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how do you like it so far? i like it so far. my classes are pretty good right now. |
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i like it so far. my classes are pretty good right now. i wish you luck. |
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it's an ugly day today. i know. i think it may rain. |
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i know. i think it may rain. it's the middle of summer, it shouldn't rain today. |
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it's the middle of summer, it shouldn't rain today. that would be weird. |
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that would be weird. yeah, especially since it's ninety degrees outside. |
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yeah, especially since it's ninety degrees outside. i know, it would be horrible if it rained and it was hot outside. |
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i know, it would be horrible if it rained and it was hot outside. yes, it would be. |
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yes, it would be. i really wish it wasn't so hot every day. |
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i really wish it wasn't so hot every day. me too. i can't wait until winter. |
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me too. i can't wait until winter. i like winter too, but sometimes it gets too cold. |
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i like winter too, but sometimes it gets too cold. i'd rather be cold than hot. |
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i'd rather be cold than hot. me too. |
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it doesn't look very nice outside today. you're right. i think it's going to rain later. |
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you're right. i think it's going to rain later. in the middle of the summer, it shouldn't be raining. |
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in the middle of the summer, it shouldn't be raining. that wouldn't seem right. |
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that wouldn't seem right. considering that it's over ninety degrees outside, that would be weird. |
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considering that it's over ninety degrees outside, that would be weird. exactly, it wouldn't be nice if it started raining. it's too hot. |
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exactly, it wouldn't be nice if it started raining. it's too hot. i know, you're absolutely right. |
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i know, you're absolutely right. i wish it would cool off one day. |
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i wish it would cool off one day. that's how i feel, i want winter to come soon. |
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that's how i feel, i want winter to come soon. i enjoy the winter, but it gets really cold sometimes. |
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i enjoy the winter, but it gets really cold sometimes. i know what you mean, but i'd rather be cold than hot. |
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i know what you mean, but i'd rather be cold than hot. that's exactly how i feel. |
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i wish it was a nicer day today. that is true. i hope it doesn't rain. |
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that is true. i hope it doesn't rain. it wouldn't rain in the middle of the summer. |
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it wouldn't rain in the middle of the summer. it wouldn't seem right if it started raining right now. |
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it wouldn't seem right if it started raining right now. it would be weird if it started raining in ninety degree weather. |
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it would be weird if it started raining in ninety degree weather. any rain right now would be pointless. |
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any rain right now would be pointless. that's right, it really would be. |
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that's right, it really would be. i want it to cool down some. |
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i want it to cool down some. i know what you mean, i can't wait until it's winter. |
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i know what you mean, i can't wait until it's winter. winter is great. i wish it didn't get so cold sometimes though. |
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winter is great. i wish it didn't get so cold sometimes though. i would rather deal with the winter than the summer. |
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it's such a nice day. yes, it is. |
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yes, it is. it looks like it may rain soon. |
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it looks like it may rain soon. yes, and i hope that it does. |
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yes, and i hope that it does. why is that? |
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why is that? i really love how rain clears the air. |
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i really love how rain clears the air. me too. it always smells so fresh after it rains. |
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me too. it always smells so fresh after it rains. yes, but i love the night air after it rains. |
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yes, but i love the night air after it rains. really? why is it? |
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really? why is it? because you can see the stars perfectly. |
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because you can see the stars perfectly. i really hope it rains today. |
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i really hope it rains today. yeah, me too. |
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isn't it a nice day? it really is. |
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it really is. it seems that it may rain today. |
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it seems that it may rain today. hopefully it will. |
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hopefully it will. how come? |
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how come? i like how clear the sky gets after it rains. |
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i like how clear the sky gets after it rains. i feel the same way. it smells so good after it rains. |
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i feel the same way. it smells so good after it rains. i especially love the night air when it rains. |
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i especially love the night air when it rains. really? why? |
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really? why? the stars look so much closer after it rains. |
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the stars look so much closer after it rains. i really want it to rain today. |
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i really want it to rain today. yeah, so do i. |
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don't you think it's nice out? yes, i think so too. |
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yes, i think so too. i think that it's going to rain. |
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i think that it's going to rain. i hope that it does rain. |
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i hope that it does rain. you like the rain? |
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you like the rain? the sky looks so clean after it rains. i love it. |
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the sky looks so clean after it rains. i love it. i understand. rain does make it smell cleaner. |
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i understand. rain does make it smell cleaner. i love most how it is at night after it rains. |
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i love most how it is at night after it rains. how come? |
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how come? you can see the stars so much more clearly after it rains. |
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you can see the stars so much more clearly after it rains. i would love for it to rain today. |
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i really want to go to the beach this weekend. that sounds like fun. what's the weather going to be like? |
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that sounds like fun. what's the weather going to be like? i heard that it's going to be warm this weekend. |
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i heard that it's going to be warm this weekend. is it going to be perfect beach weather? |
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is it going to be perfect beach weather? i believe so. |
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i believe so. good. i hope it doesn't cool off this weekend. |
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good. i hope it doesn't cool off this weekend. i know. i really want to go to the beach. |
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i know. i really want to go to the beach. but you know that california weather is really unpredictable. |
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but you know that california weather is really unpredictable. you're right. one minute it's hot, and then the next minute it's cold. |
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you're right. one minute it's hot, and then the next minute it's cold. i really wish the weather would just stay the same. |
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i really wish the weather would just stay the same. i do too. that way we can have our activities planned ahead of time. |
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i do too. that way we can have our activities planned ahead of time. yeah, that would make things a lot easier. |
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i would like to take a trip to the beach this weekend. a trip to the beach would be fun. how is the weather going to be? |
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a trip to the beach would be fun. how is the weather going to be? the forecast says that it will be warm on the weekend. |
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the forecast says that it will be warm on the weekend. so do you think it'll be perfect weather for the beach? |
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so do you think it'll be perfect weather for the beach? it sounds like it will be. |
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it sounds like it will be. i really hope it doesn't get cold. |
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i really hope it doesn't get cold. that would ruin things, i want to go so badly. |
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that would ruin things, i want to go so badly. the weather in california is unpredictable, so you never know. |
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the weather in california is unpredictable, so you never know. that is true. the weather is constantly changing. |
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that is true. the weather is constantly changing. it would be nice if the weather would never change. |
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it would be nice if the weather would never change. that would be great, then we could plan things sooner. |
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that would be great, then we could plan things sooner. true. predictable weather would make life easier. |
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it would be nice to go to the beach sometime this weekend. what's the weather going to be like? i may want to go too. |
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what's the weather going to be like? i may want to go too. the weather this weekend is supposed to be warm. |
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the weather this weekend is supposed to be warm. will it be good beach weather? |
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will it be good beach weather? i think it will be. |
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i think it will be. it wouldn't be good if it got cold this weekend. |
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it wouldn't be good if it got cold this weekend. i want this trip to be perfect, i hope it stays warm. |
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i want this trip to be perfect, i hope it stays warm. this california weather is so uncertain, it's impossible to know what'll happen. |
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this california weather is so uncertain, it's impossible to know what'll happen. i know. every day the weather seems different. |
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i know. every day the weather seems different. i would love it if it wasn't always so unpredictable. |
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i would love it if it wasn't always so unpredictable. that would make it easier for us to make plans. |
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hello, may i speak to alice please? this is she. how's it going? |
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this is she. how's it going? i've been trying to call you all day. |
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i've been trying to call you all day. sorry about that. i was cleaning up. |
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sorry about that. i was cleaning up. it's okay. |
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it's okay. so what were you calling me about? |
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so what were you calling me about? oh, i just wanted to see if you wanted to hang out tomorrow. |
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oh, i just wanted to see if you wanted to hang out tomorrow. sure, what did you want to do? |
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sure, what did you want to do? maybe we can go see a movie or something. |
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maybe we can go see a movie or something. that sounds like fun. let's do it. |
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that sounds like fun. let's do it. i'll see you tomorrow then. |
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i'll see you tomorrow then. see you then. goodbye. |
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hi, how are you. is alice there? speaking. what's up? |
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speaking. what's up? why haven't you answered the phone? |
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why haven't you answered the phone? my bad, i had chores to do. |
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my bad, i had chores to do. that's all right. |
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that's all right. what was the reason for your call? |
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what was the reason for your call? i want to do something tomorrow with you. |
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i want to do something tomorrow with you. sounds good. what did you have in mind? |
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sounds good. what did you have in mind? i was thinking about seeing a movie. |
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i was thinking about seeing a movie. okay, let's go see a movie. |
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okay, let's go see a movie. until then. |
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until then. talk to you later. |
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is alice available? you're talking to her. |
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you're talking to her. i've called you a hundred times today. |
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i've called you a hundred times today. i was busy doing something. i apologize. |
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i was busy doing something. i apologize. no problem. |
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no problem. did you need something? |
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did you need something? do you want to do something tomorrow? |
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do you want to do something tomorrow? is there somewhere special you wanted to go? |
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is there somewhere special you wanted to go? how about a movie? |
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how about a movie? a movie sounds good. |
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a movie sounds good. call me tomorrow then. |
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have you seen the new girl in school? no, i haven't. |
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no, i haven't. she's really pretty. |
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she's really pretty. describe her to me. |
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describe her to me. she's not too tall. |
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she's not too tall. well, how tall is she? |
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well, how tall is she? she's about five feet even. |
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she's about five feet even. what does she look like, though? |
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what does she look like, though? she has pretty light brown eyes. |
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she has pretty light brown eyes. i may know which girl you're talking about. |
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i may know which girl you're talking about. so you have seen her around? |
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so you have seen her around? yes, i have. |
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there's a new girl in school, have you seen her yet? i haven't seen her yet. |
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i haven't seen her yet. i think that she is very pretty. |
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i think that she is very pretty. tell me how she looks. |
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tell me how she looks. she's kind of short. |
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she's kind of short. what height is she? |
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what height is she? she's probably about five feet. |
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she's probably about five feet. that's nice, but tell me what she looks like. |
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that's nice, but tell me what she looks like. the first thing i noticed was her beautiful brown eyes. |
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the first thing i noticed was her beautiful brown eyes. i think i might've bumped into her before. |
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i think i might've bumped into her before. are you telling me that you've seen her before? |
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are you telling me that you've seen her before? i believe so. |
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have you met the new girl? no. have you? |
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no. have you? she's one of the prettiest girls at the school. |
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she's one of the prettiest girls at the school. what does she look like? |
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what does she look like? well, she's quite short. |
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well, she's quite short. how tall would you say that she is? |
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how tall would you say that she is? i would say she's only five feet. |
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i would say she's only five feet. what about her facial features? |
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what about her facial features? she has light brown eyes, absolutely beautiful. |
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she has light brown eyes, absolutely beautiful. i think i know who you're talking about. |
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i think i know who you're talking about. have you seen her? |
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why weren't you at school yesterday? i wasn't really feeling well. |
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i wasn't really feeling well. what was wrong with you? |
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what was wrong with you? my stomach was upset. |
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my stomach was upset. do you feel better now? |
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do you feel better now? i don't really feel too well yet. |
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i don't really feel too well yet. do you want anything to make you feel better? |
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do you want anything to make you feel better? no, thanks. i already took some medicine. |
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no, thanks. i already took some medicine. i hope you feel better. |
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i hope you feel better. thank you. |
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what reason do you have for missing school? i was sick. |
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i was sick. how were you sick? |
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how were you sick? i had a stomachache. |
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i had a stomachache. did it get any better? |
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did it get any better? i'm still feeling under the weather. |
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i'm still feeling under the weather. would you like anything for your stomach? |
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would you like anything for your stomach? i took something earlier. |
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i took something earlier. get better. |
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get better. thanks a lot. |
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why didn't you go to school yesterday? i stayed home because i wasn't feeling well. |
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i stayed home because i wasn't feeling well. what was your problem? |
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what was your problem? my stomach was bothering me. |
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my stomach was bothering me. are you feeling any better? |
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are you feeling any better? i'm still feeling a little sick. |
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i'm still feeling a little sick. i'm going to the store, would you like any pepto bismol? |
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i'm going to the store, would you like any pepto bismol? that's okay. |
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that's okay. i hope you feel better. |
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did you hear the good news? no, i haven't. |
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no, i haven't. i got a promotion at my job. |
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i got a promotion at my job. did you really? |
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did you really? seriously, i am so excited. |
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seriously, i am so excited. well, congratulations. |
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well, congratulations. thank you. |
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thank you. i'm so happy for you. |
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i'm so happy for you. really? |
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really? yes. you really deserved this. |
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yes. you really deserved this. you think so? |
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you think so? yes. good for you. |
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have you heard my good news? you haven't told me anything yet. |
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you haven't told me anything yet. i got a promotion at work earlier this week. |
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i got a promotion at work earlier this week. is that right? |
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is that right? it's the truth. i am really happy. |
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it's the truth. i am really happy. congratulations on your promotion. |
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congratulations on your promotion. thank you very much. |
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thank you very much. i am really excited for you. |
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i am really excited for you. are you really? |
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are you really? i'm serious. you deserved this promotion. |
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i'm serious. you deserved this promotion. is that what you really think? |
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is that what you really think? yes, i do. |
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i haven't told you what happened yet, have i? i haven't heard anything. |
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i haven't heard anything. my boss offered me a promotion, and i took it. |
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my boss offered me a promotion, and i took it. are you serious? |
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are you serious? yes, i am really excited. |
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yes, i am really excited. that's great. congratulations. |
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that's great. congratulations. i appreciate that. |
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i appreciate that. you have no idea how happy i am for you. |
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you have no idea how happy i am for you. for real? |
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you look really nice today. thank you. i just got this outfit the other day. |
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thank you. i just got this outfit the other day. really, where did you get it? |
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really, where did you get it? i got it from macy's. |
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i got it from macy's. it's really nice. |
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it's really nice. thanks again. you look nice today, too. |
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thanks again. you look nice today, too. thank you. i just got these shoes today. |
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thank you. i just got these shoes today. really? what kind of shoes are they? |
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really? what kind of shoes are they? these are called all star chuck taylors. |
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these are called all star chuck taylors. i really like those. how much did they cost? |
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i really like those. how much did they cost? they were about forty dollars. |
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they were about forty dollars. i think i'm going to go buy myself a pair. |
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i absolutely love what you're wearing today. you do? i just bought this outfit a couple days ago. |
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you do? i just bought this outfit a couple days ago. seriously, it looks really nice on you. where did you buy it from? |
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seriously, it looks really nice on you. where did you buy it from? i bought it from the macy's at the santa anita mall. |
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i bought it from the macy's at the santa anita mall. i really like that outfit. |
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i really like that outfit. thanks. i think you look nice today, too. |
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thanks. i think you look nice today, too. thank you. i just bought these new shoes earlier today. |
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thank you. i just bought these new shoes earlier today. those are nice. what are they? |
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those are nice. what are they? these are some chucks. |
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these are some chucks. those are great. how much were they? |
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those are great. how much were they? i got them for forty. |
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i got them for forty. i think i might go and find me my own pair of chucks. |
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i think that you look very cute today. is that right? this is a brand new outfit. |
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is that right? this is a brand new outfit. what store did you get it from? |
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what store did you get it from? i went to macy's and picked it out. |
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i went to macy's and picked it out. i love your outfit right now. |
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i love your outfit right now. well, i think you look nice today too. |
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well, i think you look nice today too. thanks. i found these new shoes earlier at the store. |
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thanks. i found these new shoes earlier at the store. i think that those are some really nice shoes. what kind are they? |
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i think that those are some really nice shoes. what kind are they? these are chucks. |
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these are chucks. your shoes look really nice. how much did you get them for? |
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your shoes look really nice. how much did you get them for? they only cost me about forty dollars. |
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tell me, what do you enjoy doing in your spare time? i enjoy drawing and painting. |
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i enjoy drawing and painting. you know how to draw and paint? |
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you know how to draw and paint? yes, i do. |
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yes, i do. when did you learn how to do that? |
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when did you learn how to do that? i learned back in high school. |
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i learned back in high school. oh, so you took an art class? |
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oh, so you took an art class? yeah, i loved that class. |
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yeah, i loved that class. i see that you're pretty talented. |
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i see that you're pretty talented. thank you very much. |
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thank you very much. i wish i had a talent like that. |
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i wish i had a talent like that. i'm sure you have a talent. it's just hidden. |
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what kinds of things do you like to do? i've always liked to draw and paint. |
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i've always liked to draw and paint. i didn't know you knew how to draw and paint. |
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i didn't know you knew how to draw and paint. i do it every once in a while. |
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i do it every once in a while. how long have you known how to do that? |
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how long have you known how to do that? i first learned how to do it in high school. |
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i first learned how to do it in high school. did you take some sort of art class or something? |
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did you take some sort of art class or something? that was my favorite class. |
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that was my favorite class. you have got to be talented. |
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you have got to be talented. thanks. |
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thanks. if only i was talented. |
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if only i was talented. you have a talent. you just don't know what it is yet. |
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are there any hobbies you do? when i have time, i sometimes draw and paint. |
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when i have time, i sometimes draw and paint. oh, you actually do that? |
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oh, you actually do that? every so often, i do. |
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every so often, i do. did you always know how to draw and paint? |
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did you always know how to draw and paint? i was taught in high school how to draw and paint. |
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i was taught in high school how to draw and paint. you had an art class? |
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you had an art class? exactly, it was my favorite class. |
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exactly, it was my favorite class. well, it's good that you're so talented. |
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well, it's good that you're so talented. i appreciate that. |
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i appreciate that. talent is a great thing, i wish i had one. |
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what's your favorite movie? my favorite movie is superbad. |
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my favorite movie is superbad. oh, why is that? |
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oh, why is that? it's the funniest movie that i've ever seen. |
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it's the funniest movie that i've ever seen. that's true. it is a very funny movie. |
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that's true. it is a very funny movie. you've seen it before? |
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you've seen it before? yes, i saw that movie the first day it came out in theaters. |
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yes, i saw that movie the first day it came out in theaters. didn't you laugh through the whole movie? i did. |
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didn't you laugh through the whole movie? i did. me too. that movie brought tears to my eyes. |
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me too. that movie brought tears to my eyes. mine too. |
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mine too. i have it on dvd at my house if you want to come over and watch it. |
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i have it on dvd at my house if you want to come over and watch it. sure, let's go. |
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which movie is your favorite to watch? i have to say, my favorite movie is superbad. |
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i have to say, my favorite movie is superbad. is that right? why? |
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is that right? why? honestly, it is one of the funniest movies i've seen in a long time. |
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honestly, it is one of the funniest movies i've seen in a long time. you're right. that movie is hilarious. |
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you're right. that movie is hilarious. i didn't think you saw that movie. |
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i didn't think you saw that movie. i went to see it the day it came out. |
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i went to see it the day it came out. i was laughing through the whole movie. |
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i was laughing through the whole movie. i couldn't help laughing, either. |
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i couldn't help laughing, either. same here. |
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same here. i bought the movie. would you like to come to my house and watch it? |
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i bought the movie. would you like to come to my house and watch it? of course. |
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out of every movie that you've seen, which one is your favorite? i'm going to have to say that superbad is the best movie ever. |
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i'm going to have to say that superbad is the best movie ever. you think so, how come? |
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you think so, how come? well, superbad is super funny. |
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well, superbad is super funny. you're not lying, i found that movie absolutely hilarious. |
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you're not lying, i found that movie absolutely hilarious. i didn't know that you saw superbad before. |
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i didn't know that you saw superbad before. i made sure to be in line to see it the first day it came out. |
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i made sure to be in line to see it the first day it came out. i couldn't keep from laughing throughout the whole movie. |
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i couldn't keep from laughing throughout the whole movie. i was laughing hysterically the whole time; my stomach muscles hurt afterwards. |
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i was laughing hysterically the whole time; my stomach muscles hurt afterwards. that's exactly how i felt. |
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that's exactly how i felt. i got the movie when it came out on dvd, do you want to come over? |
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what type of music do you like to listen to? i like listening to different kinds of music. |
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i like listening to different kinds of music. like what, for instance? |
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like what, for instance? i enjoy rock and r&b. |
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i enjoy rock and r&b. why is that? |
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why is that? i like the different instruments that they use. |
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i like the different instruments that they use. that's a good reason to like something. |
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that's a good reason to like something. yeah, i think so too. |
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what kind of music do you enjoy listening to? i enjoy listening to all kinds of music. |
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i enjoy listening to all kinds of music. what kind? |
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what kind? i like to listen to rock and r&b. |
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i like to listen to rock and r&b. why do you like that type of music? |
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why do you like that type of music? i like the kinds of instruments that they use. |
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i like the kinds of instruments that they use. i think that's an excellent reason to like something. |
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i think that's an excellent reason to like something. thanks, i feel the same way. |
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what is your favorite kind of music? i listen to various types of music. |
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i listen to various types of music. what genres? |
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what genres? i enjoy listening to both rock and r&b. |
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i enjoy listening to both rock and r&b. what interests you in that type of music? |
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what interests you in that type of music? i enjoy the different types of instruments that they use. |
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i enjoy the different types of instruments that they use. that is a perfect reason to like a certain kind of music. |
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did you go to the basketball game on friday? no, i couldn't make it. |
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no, i couldn't make it. you missed a really good game. |
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you missed a really good game. oh, really? who won? |
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oh, really? who won? our school did. they played really well. |
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our school did. they played really well. too bad i was busy. i really wanted to go. |
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too bad i was busy. i really wanted to go. yeah, you should have. it was really exciting. |
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yeah, you should have. it was really exciting. so what was the score? |
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so what was the score? the score was 101-98. |
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the score was 101-98. man, that was a really close game. |
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man, that was a really close game. that's what made it so great. |
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that's what made it so great. i'll make sure and make it to the next one. |
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were you able to attend friday night's basketball game? i was unable to make it. |
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i was unable to make it. you should have been there. it was intense. |
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you should have been there. it was intense. is that right. who ended up winning? |
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is that right. who ended up winning? our team was victorious. |
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our team was victorious. i wish i was free that night. i'm kind of mad that i didn't go. |
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i wish i was free that night. i'm kind of mad that i didn't go. it was a great game. |
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it was a great game. what was the score at the end of the game? |
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what was the score at the end of the game? our team won 101-98. |
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our team won 101-98. sounds like it was a close game. |
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sounds like it was a close game. that's the reason it was such a great game. |
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that's the reason it was such a great game. the next game, i will definitely be there. |
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i was meaning to ask you if you saw the basketball game on friday. i wanted to go, but i couldn't. |
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i wanted to go, but i couldn't. it was a great game. |
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it was a great game. it's too bad that i couldn't make it. who won? |
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it's too bad that i couldn't make it. who won? our team played hard and won. |
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our team played hard and won. i really wish i went to the game. |
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i really wish i went to the game. it was the best game ever. |
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it was the best game ever. so tell me the final score. |
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so tell me the final score. the other team lost by three points, 101-98. |
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the other team lost by three points, 101-98. it must've been a close game. |
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it must've been a close game. it really was. you should've gone. |
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what are you doing this weekend? i'm going to the movies with a friend. how about you? |
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i'm going to the movies with a friend. how about you? i'm not sure yet. |
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i'm not sure yet. well, did you want to go see a movie with me? |
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well, did you want to go see a movie with me? what movie are you going to see? |
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what movie are you going to see? i'm not sure yet. is there something you want to see? |
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i'm not sure yet. is there something you want to see? there's nothing i can think of. |
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there's nothing i can think of. so, did you want to go? |
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so, did you want to go? no, thanks, maybe another time. |
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no, thanks, maybe another time. okay, sounds good. |
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do you know what you're going to do this weekend? i am going to see a movie with a friend of mine. what about you? |
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i am going to see a movie with a friend of mine. what about you? i don't know. |
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i don't know. would you like to see a movie with me and my friend? |
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would you like to see a movie with me and my friend? do you know what movie you're going to watch? |
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do you know what movie you're going to watch? i don't know, but was there a certain movie you wanted to see? |
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i don't know, but was there a certain movie you wanted to see? none that i can think of. |
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none that i can think of. well, would you like to go? |
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well, would you like to go? thank you for inviting me, but i think i'll pass. |
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thank you for inviting me, but i think i'll pass. all right. another time then. |
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you have any ideas as to what you want to do this weekend? i'm going to the movie theater with my friend. what are you going to do? |
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i'm going to the movie theater with my friend. what are you going to do? i'm not quite sure yet. |
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i'm not quite sure yet. how about you see a movie with me and my friend? |
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how about you see a movie with me and my friend? what movie are you and your friend planning on watching? |
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what movie are you and your friend planning on watching? not sure. is there a movie out that catches your eye? |
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not sure. is there a movie out that catches your eye? no good movies come to mind. |
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no good movies come to mind. have you decided whether or not you would like to go? |
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have you decided whether or not you would like to go? no, thanks. maybe another time. |
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did you go to school today? yeah, i went to school today. were you there? |
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yeah, i went to school today. were you there? no, i didn't go, i've been sick. |
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no, i didn't go, i've been sick. that sucks. did you want the assignments from english class? |
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that sucks. did you want the assignments from english class? that would be nice, thank you. |
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that would be nice, thank you. no problem, you're welcome. |
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no problem, you're welcome. i will be glad to do the same for you when you're sick. |
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i will be glad to do the same for you when you're sick. well, thank you. i hope to see you at school tomorrow. |
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have you attended school today? i attended school today. did you? |
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i attended school today. did you? i wasn't able to attend school because i was feeling ill. |
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i wasn't able to attend school because i was feeling ill. i'm sorry to hear that. would you like the assignments from english class? |
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i'm sorry to hear that. would you like the assignments from english class? i would really appreciate that, thanks. |
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i would really appreciate that, thanks. it's no trouble at all. |
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it's no trouble at all. if you get sick, i'll return the favor. |
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if you get sick, i'll return the favor. thanks. see you at school tomorrow if you feel better. |
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have you gone to school today? i went to school today. did you go to school? |
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i went to school today. did you go to school? i couldn't go to school today, i was sick. |
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i couldn't go to school today, i was sick. that's horrible. i'd be happy to give you the assignments from english class. |
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that's horrible. i'd be happy to give you the assignments from english class. thank you very much, that's kind of you. |
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thank you very much, that's kind of you. don't mention it. |
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don't mention it. when you miss a day of school, i'll be happy to give you the english assignments. |
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did you hear the news? what happened? |
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what happened? our cousin went into labor and had her baby last week. |
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our cousin went into labor and had her baby last week. she did? why didn't anyone tell me? |
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she did? why didn't anyone tell me? i would've thought that somebody would have told you. |
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i would've thought that somebody would have told you. no, i had no idea. |
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no, i had no idea. well, she did, her baby was 8 pounds 6 ounces. |
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well, she did, her baby was 8 pounds 6 ounces. oh my god, that's great! |
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oh my god, that's great! are you going to go and visit her and the baby? |
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are you going to go and visit her and the baby? i think that i might. |
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i think that i might. good! i just thought i'd let you know. |
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good! i just thought i'd let you know. thanks for telling me. |
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have you heard what happened? heard what? |
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heard what? debrah already had her baby. |
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debrah already had her baby. i didn't know that. |
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i didn't know that. i thought you knew. |
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i thought you knew. i honestly didn't know. |
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i honestly didn't know. the baby was 8 pounds 6 ounces. |
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the baby was 8 pounds 6 ounces. that's good to hear. |
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that's good to hear. will you go and visit them? |
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will you go and visit them? of course i will. |
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of course i will. i just wanted to give you the good news. |
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i just wanted to give you the good news. thanks for letting me know. |
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have you heard the news? i haven't heard anything. |
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i haven't heard anything. debrah had her baby last week. |
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debrah had her baby last week. nobody told me. |
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nobody told me. i thought you heard. |
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i thought you heard. i really wasn't told anything. |
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i really wasn't told anything. she was a cute 8 pounds 6 ounces. |
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she was a cute 8 pounds 6 ounces. wow, how exciting. |
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wow, how exciting. i know, you should really go and see her and the baby. |
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i know, you should really go and see her and the baby. of course i will. |
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of course i will. i just wanted to let you know what happened. |
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did you go to school today? of course. did you? |
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of course. did you? i didn't want to, so i didn't. |
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i didn't want to, so i didn't. that's sad, but have you gone to the movies recently? |
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that's sad, but have you gone to the movies recently? that's a switch. |
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that's a switch. i'm serious, have you? |
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i'm serious, have you? no, i haven't. why? |
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no, i haven't. why? i really want to go to the movies this weekend. |
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i really want to go to the movies this weekend. so go then. |
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so go then. i really don't want to go by myself. |
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i really don't want to go by myself. well anyway, do you plan on going to school tomorrow? |
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well anyway, do you plan on going to school tomorrow? no, i think i'm going to go to the movies. |
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did you make it to school today? i always do. did you go to school today? |
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i always do. did you go to school today? no, i didn't. |
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no, i didn't. you should have, but have you seen any movies lately? |
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you should have, but have you seen any movies lately? that was an odd change of subject. |
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that was an odd change of subject. maybe it was, but answer the question. |
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maybe it was, but answer the question. no, not recently. |
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no, not recently. i want to go to see a movie this weekend. |
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i want to go to see a movie this weekend. what's stopping you then? |
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what's stopping you then? i don't want to go alone. |
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i don't want to go alone. so, will you be at school tomorrow? |
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so, will you be at school tomorrow? no, i want to go to the movies instead. |
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did you even bother to go to school today? yeah, i went. did you go? |
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yeah, i went. did you go? no, i didn't feel like it. |
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no, i didn't feel like it. that's nice, have you been to the movies lately? |
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that's nice, have you been to the movies lately? no, but that was a random change of subject. |
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no, but that was a random change of subject. it may have been random, but have you? |
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it may have been random, but have you? i haven't lately. |
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i haven't lately. i would love to catch a movie this weekend. |
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i would love to catch a movie this weekend. so then, why don't you just go? |
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so then, why don't you just go? i don't want to see a movie by myself. |
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i don't want to see a movie by myself. okay, so are you going to school tomorrow? |
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thanks for coming to see me today. it's no problem. i was really missing you anyway. |
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it's no problem. i was really missing you anyway. i missed you too. |
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i missed you too. why haven't you tried to come see me then? |
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why haven't you tried to come see me then? i've been really busy. |
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i've been really busy. doing what? |
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doing what? working. |
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working. i would've come to see you sooner, but i've been busy too. |
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i would've come to see you sooner, but i've been busy too. what have you been doing? |
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what have you been doing? i've been working too. |
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i've been working too. well regardless, i'm very happy that you came to see me. |
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well regardless, i'm very happy that you came to see me. i am too. |
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i'm really glad that you came to see me. i had to. i was missing you a lot. |
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i had to. i was missing you a lot. i was missing you too. |
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i was missing you too. so, why haven't you visited me? |
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so, why haven't you visited me? i've actually been busy lately. |
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i've actually been busy lately. what have you been doing? |
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what have you been doing? i've just been working really hard. |
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i've just been working really hard. i've also been busy. |
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i've also been busy. tell me what you've been doing. |
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tell me what you've been doing. basically, i've been working too. |
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basically, i've been working too. well whatever, i'm glad you came. |
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well whatever, i'm glad you came. so am i. |
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i'm really happy that you came to visit me. i really missed you a lot. |
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i really missed you a lot. i've been missing you like crazy. |
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i've been missing you like crazy. i don't understand why you haven't come to visit me. |
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i don't understand why you haven't come to visit me. lately, i've been quite busy. |
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lately, i've been quite busy. tell me what you've been up to. |
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tell me what you've been up to. i've really been working a lot lately. |
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i've really been working a lot lately. i've been pretty busy myself. |
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i've been pretty busy myself. so what have you been up to? |
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so what have you been up to? i've just been working a lot. |
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i've just been working a lot. whatever the reason may be, i'm glad you visited me. |
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hey, did you hear about jessica's party this weekend? yeah, but i'm still waiting for my invitation. |
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yeah, but i'm still waiting for my invitation. oh really? she gave me mine earlier today. |
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oh really? she gave me mine earlier today. well, she'll probably just give me my invitation later on today. |
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well, she'll probably just give me my invitation later on today. yeah, so are you planning on going? |
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yeah, so are you planning on going? i think so. it sounds like it's going to be a lot of fun. |
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i think so. it sounds like it's going to be a lot of fun. it really does, i can't wait. |
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it really does, i can't wait. what time does the party start? |
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what time does the party start? it starts at 8 o'clock. |
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it starts at 8 o'clock. oh, well, how many people has she given invites to so far? |
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oh, well, how many people has she given invites to so far? i'm not sure, but i don't think she's given out that many. |
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i'm not sure, but i don't think she's given out that many. well, hopefully she'll give me my invite later on today. |
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have you heard about jessica's party on saturday? i've heard about it, but i'm still waiting for my invitation. |
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i've heard about it, but i'm still waiting for my invitation. really? i got mine from her this morning. |
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really? i got mine from her this morning. i'm guessing that she's going to give me my invite today or tomorrow. |
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i'm guessing that she's going to give me my invite today or tomorrow. you're probably right, do you intend on going to the party? |
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you're probably right, do you intend on going to the party? i want to. i heard it's going to be really fun. |
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i want to. i heard it's going to be really fun. i know, it does sound pretty awesome. |
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i know, it does sound pretty awesome. well, when does the party start? |
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well, when does the party start? it's supposed to start at about eight. |
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it's supposed to start at about eight. how many invitations has she given out? |
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how many invitations has she given out? i really don't know, but i don't think she gave out that many yet. |
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i really don't know, but i don't think she gave out that many yet. i really want to go, so i hope that she gives me my invite soon. |
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has anyone told you about jessica's party coming up? i was told about it already. i'm just waiting for my invitation. |
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i was told about it already. i'm just waiting for my invitation. is that right? i already got my invitation from her earlier. |
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is that right? i already got my invitation from her earlier. i believe that she will give me the invitation today. |
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i believe that she will give me the invitation today. are you even going to go? |
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are you even going to go? yeah, it sounds like it's going to be the best party of the year. |
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yeah, it sounds like it's going to be the best party of the year. exactly, it seems like it's going to be loads of fun. |
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exactly, it seems like it's going to be loads of fun. when exactly does the party start? |
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when exactly does the party start? the invitation says it starts at 8:00 p.m. |
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the invitation says it starts at 8:00 p.m. has she given out a lot of invitations yet? |
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has she given out a lot of invitations yet? i have no idea, she hasn't given out many though. |
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hey, what's up? nothing really. |
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nothing really. i'm throwing a party on friday. |
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i'm throwing a party on friday. i didn't realize that. |
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i didn't realize that. you didn't? |
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you didn't? nobody has told me anything about your party. |
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nobody has told me anything about your party. did you want to go? |
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did you want to go? when does it start? |
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when does it start? at 8:00 p.m. |
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at 8:00 p.m. i'll be there. |
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i'll be there. i'd better see you there. |
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i'd better see you there. of course. |
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what's going on with you? fine. what's going on with you? |
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fine. what's going on with you? i'm having a party this friday. |
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i'm having a party this friday. i had no idea. |
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i had no idea. is that right? |
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is that right? i didn't hear anything about it. |
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i didn't hear anything about it. can you go? |
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can you go? what time? |
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what time? it starts at 8 o'clock. |
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it starts at 8 o'clock. i'll go. |
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i'll go. i hope that i'll see you there. |
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i hope that i'll see you there. no doubt. |
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what's going on? not much. |
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not much. this friday, i'm throwing a party. |
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this friday, i'm throwing a party. oh really? i didn't know that. |
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oh really? i didn't know that. are you serious? |
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are you serious? i haven't heard anything about it. |
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i haven't heard anything about it. can you make it? |
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can you make it? what time does it start? |
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what time does it start? the party starts at 8. |
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the party starts at 8. yeah, i think i'll go. |
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yeah, i think i'll go. am i going to see you there? |
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what's going on? nothing really, you? |
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nothing really, you? i'm throwing a party next saturday. |
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i'm throwing a party next saturday. is that right? |
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is that right? yeah, are you going to come? |
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yeah, are you going to come? i'm sorry, i can't. |
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i'm sorry, i can't. why not? |
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why not? i don't really want to. |
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i don't really want to. well, why don't you? |
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well, why don't you? i hate going to parties. |
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i hate going to parties. well, that's okay. |
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well, that's okay. yeah, sorry. |
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what's up? nothing, how about you? |
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nothing, how about you? next saturday, i'm going to have a party. |
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next saturday, i'm going to have a party. oh, really? |
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oh, really? you are coming? |
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you are coming? probably not. |
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probably not. why is that? |
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why is that? i don't feel like going. |
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i don't feel like going. why not? |
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why not? i really can't stand going to parties. |
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i really can't stand going to parties. i understand, i guess. |
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i understand, i guess. sorry about that. |
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what's happening? not a lot, what about you? |
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not a lot, what about you? i'm having a party next saturday. |
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i'm having a party next saturday. that's nice. |
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that's nice. are you going to be there? |
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are you going to be there? i don't think so. |
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i don't think so. is there a reason why? |
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is there a reason why? i just really don't want to go. |
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i just really don't want to go. how come? |
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how come? i don't really like parties. |
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i don't really like parties. i wish you would go, but that's okay. |
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what's up? nothing much, what's going on? |
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nothing much, what's going on? i'm having a party this friday. |
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i'm having a party this friday. oh, really? that's nice. |
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oh, really? that's nice. i wanted to see if you wanted to come. |
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i wanted to see if you wanted to come. this friday? sorry, i already have plans. |
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this friday? sorry, i already have plans. doing what? |
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doing what? i'm going to dinner with my family. |
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i'm going to dinner with my family. i really wanted you to come, but i understand. |
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i really wanted you to come, but i understand. yeah, maybe next time. |
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yeah, maybe next time. i'll hold you to that. |
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i'll hold you to that. sounds like a plan. |
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hey, what's good with you? not a lot. what about you? |
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not a lot. what about you? i'm throwing a party on friday. |
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i'm throwing a party on friday. that sounds like fun. |
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that sounds like fun. do you think you can come? |
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do you think you can come? i'm sorry. i'm already doing something this friday. |
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i'm sorry. i'm already doing something this friday. what are you going to be doing? |
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what are you going to be doing? my family and i are going to dinner. |
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my family and i are going to dinner. i was hoping you would come. |
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i was hoping you would come. i'll definitely try to make it the next time. |
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i'll definitely try to make it the next time. i'd better see you there. |
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i'd better see you there. all right. i'll see you next time. |
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what's going on? nothing really. how about you? |
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nothing really. how about you? a lot, like the party i'm having on friday. |
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a lot, like the party i'm having on friday. well, that's cool. |
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well, that's cool. will you be able to make it? |
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will you be able to make it? i'm busy this friday. i'm sorry. |
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i'm busy this friday. i'm sorry. what do you have to do? |
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what do you have to do? i'm having dinner with my family |
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i'm having dinner with my family maybe you can come next time. |
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maybe you can come next time. i'll make sure and come to your next party. |
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i'll make sure and come to your next party. i'll look for you at my next party. |
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it was nice talking to you. why are you trying to rush me off the phone? |
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why are you trying to rush me off the phone? i really have to go. |
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i really have to go. why? i still wanted to talk to you. |
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why? i still wanted to talk to you. i have things to do. |
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i have things to do. like what? |
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like what? don't be nosey. |
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don't be nosey. i'm not. i just want to know. |
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i'm not. i just want to know. well, it's really none of your business. |
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well, it's really none of your business. that's harsh. |
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that's harsh. i'm sorry, but i have to go. |
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i'm sorry, but i have to go. fine. |
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i've enjoyed conversing with you. is there a reason why you're trying to get off the phone so fast? |
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is there a reason why you're trying to get off the phone so fast? i've got to go. |
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i've got to go. i wasn't done talking to you. |
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i wasn't done talking to you. i have to do some things, and besides, it's not polite to be nosey. |
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i have to do some things, and besides, it's not polite to be nosey. i'm not being nosey. i'm just asking. |
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i'm not being nosey. i'm just asking. i really don't think it's any of your business. |
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i really don't think it's any of your business. that's not nice. |
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that's not nice. i apologize, but i'm getting off the phone now. |
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i apologize, but i'm getting off the phone now. okay. |
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i'll talk to you later. what's the rush? |
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what's the rush? i have to get off the phone now. |
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i have to get off the phone now. i'm not ready to get off the phone with you. |
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i'm not ready to get off the phone with you. there are other things i need to take care of. |
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there are other things i need to take care of. what is it that you need to do? |
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what is it that you need to do? please don't be nosey. |
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please don't be nosey. i'm not being nosey, it's just a question. |
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i'm not being nosey, it's just a question. you don't need to worry about that. |
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you don't need to worry about that. that was mean to say. |
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that was mean to say. i am very sorry, but i must go. |
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well, it was nice talking to you. it was nice talking to you too. |
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it was nice talking to you too. we should really hang out again. |
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we should really hang out again. that would be fun. |
|
that would be fun. where do you want to go? |
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where do you want to go? i think we should go out to eat. |
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i think we should go out to eat. that sounds good. |
|
that sounds good. all right, so i'll see you then. |
|
all right, so i'll see you then. i'll call you later. |
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i'll call you later. okay, i'll talk to you later then. |
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okay, i'll talk to you later then. see you later. |
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see you later. bye. |
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i enjoyed talking to you. i enjoyed talking to you too. |
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i enjoyed talking to you too. we should hang out some time. |
|
we should hang out some time. i think that would be nice. |
|
i think that would be nice. is there anything you would like to do next time? |
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is there anything you would like to do next time? do you want to go out to eat? |
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do you want to go out to eat? i'd like that. |
|
i'd like that. so i'll see you next time. |
|
so i'll see you next time. i'm going to call you soon. |
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i'm going to call you soon. i'll talk to you later. |
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i'll talk to you later. see you soon. |
|
see you soon. goodbye. |
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i had fun talking to you. it was really nice talking to you also. |
|
it was really nice talking to you also. i think we should really do something sometime. |
|
i think we should really do something sometime. that should be loads of fun. |
|
that should be loads of fun. what do you want to do next time? |
|
what do you want to do next time? would you like to go to dinner or something? |
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would you like to go to dinner or something? yeah, let's do that. |
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yeah, let's do that. okay, until next time then. |
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okay, until next time then. i'll call you so we can set that up. |
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i'll call you so we can set that up. talk to you then. |
|
talk to you then. all right, see you. |
|
where do you live? i live in pasadena. |
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i live in pasadena. where is pasadena? |
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where is pasadena? it's in california. |
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it's in california. is it in northern california? |
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is it in northern california? no. it's in southern california. |
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no. it's in southern california. is pasadena a big city? |
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is pasadena a big city? it's pretty big. |
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it's pretty big. how big is "pretty big"? |
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how big is "pretty big"? it has about 140,000 people. |
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it has about 140,000 people. how big is los angeles? |
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how big is los angeles? it has about 3 million people. |
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do you have a car? yes, i do. |
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yes, i do. what kind of car do you have? |
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what kind of car do you have? i have a honda. |
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i have a honda. is it new? |
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is it new? it was new in 2003. |
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it was new in 2003. so, it's pretty old now. |
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so, it's pretty old now. yes, it is. but it still looks good. |
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yes, it is. but it still looks good. do you take good care of it? |
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do you take good care of it? oh, yes. i wash it once a week. |
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oh, yes. i wash it once a week. do you change the oil? |
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do you change the oil? my mechanic changes the oil twice a year. |
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do you have a girlfriend? no, i don't. do you? |
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no, i don't. do you? i don't have a girlfriend, either. |
|
i don't have a girlfriend, either. why not? |
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why not? i don't know. maybe i'm not rich enough. |
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i don't know. maybe i'm not rich enough. girls like guys with money. |
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girls like guys with money. they sure do. |
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they sure do. they like guys with new cars. |
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they like guys with new cars. i don't have money or a new car. |
|
i don't have money or a new car. me, neither. |
|
me, neither. but girls like guys who are funny. |
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but girls like guys who are funny. maybe we should learn some good jokes. |
|
where are you going? i have to walk the dog. |
|
i have to walk the dog. what kind of dog do you have? |
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what kind of dog do you have? i have a little poodle. |
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i have a little poodle. poodles bark a lot. |
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poodles bark a lot. they sure do. |
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they sure do. they bark at everything. |
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they bark at everything. they never shut up. |
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they never shut up. why did you get a poodle? |
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why did you get a poodle? it's my mom's dog. |
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it's my mom's dog. so she likes poodles. |
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so she likes poodles. she says they're good watchdogs. |
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can i borrow $5? sure. why do you need it? |
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sure. why do you need it? i want to buy lunch. |
|
i want to buy lunch. where's your money? |
|
where's your money? it's not in my wallet. |
|
it's not in my wallet. your wallet is empty? |
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your wallet is empty? i don't have even one dollar in it. |
|
i don't have even one dollar in it. being broke is no fun. |
|
being broke is no fun. even if it's only for a short while. |
|
even if it's only for a short while. it's always good to have friends. |
|
it's always good to have friends. friends will lend you money when you're broke. |
|
friends will lend you money when you're broke. as long as you pay them back. |
|
let's go to the beach. that's a great idea. |
|
that's a great idea. we haven't been in a while. |
|
we haven't been in a while. we haven't been in a month. |
|
we haven't been in a month. the last time we went, you almost drowned. |
|
the last time we went, you almost drowned. no, i didn't. |
|
no, i didn't. then why did the lifeguard dive into the water? |
|
then why did the lifeguard dive into the water? i think he wanted to cool off. |
|
i think he wanted to cool off. he swam right up to you. |
|
he swam right up to you. and then he turned right around. |
|
and then he turned right around. maybe you're right. |
|
maybe you're right. maybe we should get going. |
|
are you married? no. i'm divorced. |
|
no. i'm divorced. when did you get divorced? |
|
when did you get divorced? i got divorced two years ago. |
|
i got divorced two years ago. why did you get divorced? |
|
why did you get divorced? my wife left me. |
|
my wife left me. why did she leave you? |
|
why did she leave you? she said she didn't love me anymore. |
|
she said she didn't love me anymore. wow! that's terrible. |
|
wow! that's terrible. yes, it was. |
|
yes, it was. why didn't she love you anymore? |
|
why didn't she love you anymore? she fell in love with my best friend. |
|
i'm bored. what's on tv? |
|
what's on tv? nothing. |
|
nothing. there must be something on tv! |
|
there must be something on tv! nothing that's interesting. |
|
nothing that's interesting. what about that new game show? |
|
what about that new game show? which one? |
|
which one? "deal or no deal" |
|
"deal or no deal" tell me you're joking. |
|
tell me you're joking. i love that show. |
|
i love that show. i watched it once. that was enough. |
|
i watched it once. that was enough. it's on right now. let's watch it together. |
|
i like living here. i agree. pasadena is a nice city. |
|
i agree. pasadena is a nice city. it's not too big. |
|
it's not too big. and it's not too small. |
|
and it's not too small. it has great weather all year long. |
|
it has great weather all year long. it has the rose parade. |
|
it has the rose parade. it has beautiful houses. |
|
it has beautiful houses. it has wonderful restaurants. |
|
it has wonderful restaurants. it has great schools. |
|
it has great schools. it's close to the mountains. |
|
it's close to the mountains. the people are friendly. |
|
the people are friendly. i'm not ever going to leave. |
|
we need a new mattress. what's the matter with this one? |
|
what's the matter with this one? it's not comfortable. |
|
it's not comfortable. it seems fine to me. |
|
it seems fine to me. i toss and turn all night. |
|
i toss and turn all night. you should stop drinking coffee. |
|
you should stop drinking coffee. look at these marks on my arms. |
|
look at these marks on my arms. what are they? |
|
what are they? they are bites. |
|
they are bites. did the cat bite you? |
|
did the cat bite you? no. the bedbugs in that mattress bit me. |
|
no. the bedbugs in that mattress bit me. okay. let's get a new mattress. |
|
my laptop is so slow. buy a new one. |
|
buy a new one. i would if i had the money. |
|
i would if i had the money. why is it so slow? |
|
why is it so slow? that's a good question. |
|
that's a good question. did you take it to a computer shop? |
|
did you take it to a computer shop? i would if i had the money. |
|
i would if i had the money. well, i guess you have to live with it. |
|
well, i guess you have to live with it. sometimes i want to throw it out the window. |
|
sometimes i want to throw it out the window. you don't want to do that. |
|
you don't want to do that. why not? |
|
why not? you might hit someone in the head. |
|
what's for dinner? i'm not sure. |
|
i'm not sure. how about a pizza? |
|
how about a pizza? you had pizza for lunch. |
|
you had pizza for lunch. but i love pizza. |
|
but i love pizza. everybody loves pizza. |
|
everybody loves pizza. so why can't i have pizza for dinner? |
|
so why can't i have pizza for dinner? because you need variety. |
|
because you need variety. what's "variety? |
|
what's "variety? different thingsnot the same thing all the time. |
|
different thingsnot the same thing all the time. you mean, like a pepperoni pizza instead of a cheese pizza? |
|
you mean, like a pepperoni pizza instead of a cheese pizza? no, i mean a salad instead of a pizza. |
|
we need to save money. why do we need to save money? |
|
why do we need to save money? because we need to buy a house. |
|
because we need to buy a house. but a house is so expensive. |
|
but a house is so expensive. that's why we need to save money. |
|
that's why we need to save money. how much do we need to save? |
|
how much do we need to save? we need to save enough for a down payment. |
|
we need to save enough for a down payment. how much is that? |
|
how much is that? that's about $30,000. |
|
that's about $30,000. thirty thousand dollars! that will take forever. |
|
thirty thousand dollars! that will take forever. not if we save every penny. |
|
not if we save every penny. okay. here's seven pennies. |
|
the ocean is so big. you can't see the end of it. |
|
you can't see the end of it. it goes on and on forever. |
|
it goes on and on forever. and it's deep, too. |
|
and it's deep, too. i think it's five miles deep. |
|
i think it's five miles deep. are there fish at the bottom? |
|
are there fish at the bottom? there are fish at the top and the bottom. |
|
there are fish at the top and the bottom. are there more fish or more people? |
|
are there more fish or more people? i think there are more fish. |
|
i think there are more fish. i hope so. i love to eat fish. |
|
i'm upset with my mom. why is that? |
|
why is that? i warned her about her new boyfriend. she didn't listen to me. |
|
i warned her about her new boyfriend. she didn't listen to me. what happened? |
|
what happened? i gave her $1,000 for her birthday. i told her to spend it on herself. |
|
i gave her $1,000 for her birthday. i told her to spend it on herself. that was very nice of you. |
|
that was very nice of you. i found out that she gave it to her new boyfriend. |
|
i found out that she gave it to her new boyfriend. why did she do that? |
|
why did she do that? he said he would buy her a nice ring. |
|
he said he would buy her a nice ring. what's wrong with that? |
|
what's wrong with that? he went to las vegas. he lost it all gambling. |
|
he went to las vegas. he lost it all gambling. i hope your mom broke up with him. |
|
do animals talk to each other? of course they talk to each other. |
|
of course they talk to each other. what do they talk about? |
|
what do they talk about? they talk about other animals. |
|
they talk about other animals. what else do they talk about? |
|
what else do they talk about? they talk about food and the weather. |
|
they talk about food and the weather. do they talk about us? |
|
do they talk about us? of course they talk about us. |
|
of course they talk about us. what do they say about us? |
|
what do they say about us? they say that we are funny-looking. |
|
they say that we are funny-looking. ha! we're not funny-looking; animals are funny-looking. |
|
ha! we're not funny-looking; animals are funny-looking. we're funny-looking because we wear clothes. |
|
i have to clean the house. yes, it's very dirty. |
|
yes, it's very dirty. you can help me. |
|
you can help me. why me? |
|
why me? because you helped make it dirty. |
|
because you helped make it dirty. what do you want me to do? |
|
what do you want me to do? i want you to clean the bathroom. |
|
i want you to clean the bathroom. oh, that's easy. |
|
oh, that's easy. clean the sink, the tub, the counter, and the toilet. |
|
clean the sink, the tub, the counter, and the toilet. that's a lot of work. |
|
that's a lot of work. tell me when you finish. |
|
tell me when you finish. i don't think so. you'll just give me more work. |
|
you're watching too much tv. what do you mean? |
|
what do you mean? i mean you're wasting your life. |
|
i mean you're wasting your life. i'm having fun. |
|
i'm having fun. you're sitting there with your mouth open. |
|
you're sitting there with your mouth open. who cares? |
|
who cares? i care. do something. |
|
i care. do something. okay. i did something. |
|
okay. i did something. what did you do? |
|
what did you do? i turned up the volume. |
|
i turned up the volume. that's not what i meant by "do something." |
|
that's not what i meant by "do something." will you do something? leave me alone. |
|
did you write a letter to grandma? yes, i did. |
|
yes, i did. did you tell her about school? |
|
did you tell her about school? i told her that school is fun. |
|
i told her that school is fun. did you put the letter in an envelope? |
|
did you put the letter in an envelope? yes, and i sealed the envelope. |
|
yes, and i sealed the envelope. did you put a stamp on the envelope? |
|
did you put a stamp on the envelope? i couldn't find any stamps. |
|
i couldn't find any stamps. they're in the kitchen drawer. |
|
they're in the kitchen drawer. okay. i just put a stamp on the envelope. |
|
okay. i just put a stamp on the envelope. give me the envelope, and i'll mail it for you. |
|
give me the envelope, and i'll mail it for you. when is grandma going to learn about e-mail? |
|
why are you yawning? i'm sleepy. |
|
i'm sleepy. why don't you go to bed? |
|
why don't you go to bed? i want to watch this tv show. |
|
i want to watch this tv show. maybe you should record it. |
|
maybe you should record it. the tape recorder is broken. |
|
the tape recorder is broken. then you should watch the rerun. |
|
then you should watch the rerun. why? i'm watching the original. |
|
why? i'm watching the original. but you'll be asleep in about one minute. |
|
but you'll be asleep in about one minute. i'm just yawning because the commercials are on. |
|
i'm just yawning because the commercials are on. okay. i'll tell you how the show ends. |
|
okay. i'll tell you how the show ends. zzz. |
|
it's sunday. so? |
|
so? you know what that means. |
|
you know what that means. i forgot. |
|
i forgot. sunday means we go to church. |
|
sunday means we go to church. oh, yeah. |
|
oh, yeah. put on a coat and tie. |
|
put on a coat and tie. why? |
|
why? to show respect to god and others. |
|
to show respect to god and others. i'm glad sunday is only once a week. |
|
i'm glad sunday is only once a week. i hope god didn't hear that. |
|
i hope god didn't hear that. he'll forgive me. |
|
did you feed the cat? i'll do that in a minute. |
|
i'll do that in a minute. the cat is meowing. he's hungry. |
|
the cat is meowing. he's hungry. okay. i'll feed him right now. |
|
okay. i'll feed him right now. you shouldn't make him wait. |
|
you shouldn't make him wait. i was doing my homework. |
|
i was doing my homework. the cat doesn't care about your homework. |
|
the cat doesn't care about your homework. the cat doesn't care about anything. |
|
the cat doesn't care about anything. that's the way cats are. |
|
that's the way cats are. all they think about is themselves. |
|
all they think about is themselves. maybe we should get rid of him. |
|
maybe we should get rid of him. of course not! he's family. |
|
i hate shaving. me too. |
|
me too. i just cut myself again. |
|
i just cut myself again. did you use a new blade? |
|
did you use a new blade? it doesn't matter. old blades cut, new blades cut. |
|
it doesn't matter. old blades cut, new blades cut. maybe you should use an electric shaver. |
|
maybe you should use an electric shaver. they make a lot of noise, but they don't give a close shave. |
|
they make a lot of noise, but they don't give a close shave. maybe you should stop shaving. |
|
maybe you should stop shaving. and grow a beard? |
|
and grow a beard? sure. why not? |
|
sure. why not? because food and other stuff sticks in my beard. |
|
because food and other stuff sticks in my beard. hmm. here's an idea. put cream on your face and have the cat lick it off. |
|
excuse me. yes? |
|
yes? are you reading this paper? |
|
are you reading this paper? oh, no. help yourself. |
|
oh, no. help yourself. i asked because the paper is sitting next to you. |
|
i asked because the paper is sitting next to you. thank you. that's polite of you to ask. |
|
thank you. that's polite of you to ask. some people would just pick it up. |
|
some people would just pick it up. yes, i know. some people are rude. |
|
yes, i know. some people are rude. i always try to be polite. |
|
i always try to be polite. so do i. |
|
so do i. the world needs more polite people like us. |
|
the world needs more polite people like us. i agree 100 percent. |
|
mom, i want a puppy. let me think about it. |
|
let me think about it. why do you have to think about it? |
|
why do you have to think about it? because a puppy costs money. |
|
because a puppy costs money. no, it doesn't. puppies are free. |
|
no, it doesn't. puppies are free. yes, but a puppy needs shots. |
|
yes, but a puppy needs shots. shots for what? |
|
shots for what? so it won't get sick. just like you get shots. |
|
so it won't get sick. just like you get shots. i hate shots. |
|
i hate shots. and a puppy eats food. food costs money. |
|
and a puppy eats food. food costs money. no problem. i'll give him food off my plate. |
|
no problem. i'll give him food off my plate. oh, no you don't. puppies don't eat vegetables. |
|
look at all these kittens! how many are there? |
|
how many are there? eight. |
|
eight. they're all so cute. |
|
they're all so cute. yes, but i can't keep them. |
|
yes, but i can't keep them. what are you going to do with them? |
|
what are you going to do with them? i'm going to give them away. do you want one? |
|
i'm going to give them away. do you want one? yes, i would love one. |
|
yes, i would love one. which one do you want? |
|
which one do you want? that one. the one that's all black. |
|
that one. the one that's all black. yes, i like that one, too. |
|
yes, i like that one, too. i'll call him blacky. |
|
my parents go to church every sunday. they trust in god. |
|
they trust in god. they hope they will go to heaven. |
|
they hope they will go to heaven. they probably will. |
|
they probably will. but no one knows for sure. |
|
but no one knows for sure. that's for sure. |
|
that's for sure. no one knows what happens after we die. |
|
no one knows what happens after we die. if we are good, we will be happy in heaven with god. |
|
if we are good, we will be happy in heaven with god. that's what many people believe. |
|
that's what many people believe. if we are bad, we will be unhappy forever in hell. |
|
if we are bad, we will be unhappy forever in hell. i don't want to go to hell. |
|
i don't want to go to hell. let's go to church with your parents on sunday. |
|
my husband died. i'm sorry for you. |
|
i'm sorry for you. thank you. |
|
thank you. when did he die? |
|
when did he die? a couple of months ago. |
|
a couple of months ago. you still miss him. |
|
you still miss him. yes, but i talk to him almost every day. |
|
yes, but i talk to him almost every day. when you go to church? |
|
when you go to church? no, when i call him on his cell phone. |
|
no, when i call him on his cell phone. what do you mean? |
|
what do you mean? i buried him with his cell phone. |
|
i buried him with his cell phone. what will you do when the battery dies? |
|
today is friday the thirteenth. that's a bad day. |
|
that's a bad day. it's supposed to be unlucky. |
|
it's supposed to be unlucky. you're supposed to stay home all day. |
|
you're supposed to stay home all day. that's what i do. |
|
that's what i do. my friend stayed in a hotel on friday the thirteenth. |
|
my friend stayed in a hotel on friday the thirteenth. that was a mistake. |
|
that was a mistake. he stayed on the thirteenth floor. |
|
he stayed on the thirteenth floor. what happened? |
|
what happened? someone stole his laptop. |
|
someone stole his laptop. he was asking for it. |
|
he was asking for it. he learned his lesson. he's home today. |
|
do you really love me? of course. |
|
of course. prove it. |
|
prove it. how can i prove it? |
|
how can i prove it? take me to dinner. |
|
take me to dinner. that's it? that's all i have to do? |
|
that's it? that's all i have to do? take me to a nice restaurant, not to mcdonald's. |
|
take me to a nice restaurant, not to mcdonald's. but a nice restaurant costs money. |
|
but a nice restaurant costs money. yes, and you have to make a reservation. |
|
yes, and you have to make a reservation. that's such a hassle. |
|
that's such a hassle. i knew you didn't love me. |
|
i knew you didn't love me. okay, okay! i'll make a reservation right now. |
|
my parents are divorced. so are mine. |
|
so are mine. why did your parents get divorced? |
|
why did your parents get divorced? my father found a new girlfriend. |
|
my father found a new girlfriend. that's too bad. |
|
that's too bad. my mother was hurt and angry. |
|
my mother was hurt and angry. she had good reason. what did she do? |
|
she had good reason. what did she do? she told him to drop his girlfriend. |
|
she told him to drop his girlfriend. what did your father do? |
|
what did your father do? he moved out of our house. |
|
he moved out of our house. i guess he really liked his new girlfriend. |
|
i guess he really liked his new girlfriend. yes, but she left him a year later. |
|
my grandma's apartment smells funny. so does mine. |
|
so does mine. i think it's an old people's smell. |
|
i think it's an old people's smell. really? |
|
really? yes. i think when you get old, you begin to smell. |
|
yes. i think when you get old, you begin to smell. like fruit that is too ripe? |
|
like fruit that is too ripe? yes, just like fruit that is too ripe. |
|
yes, just like fruit that is too ripe. but the smell is different. |
|
but the smell is different. yes, old people don't smell like fruit. |
|
yes, old people don't smell like fruit. no, they smell like a thrift shop. |
|
no, they smell like a thrift shop. yes, a thrift shop has that same smell. |
|
yes, a thrift shop has that same smell. yes, an old smell. |
|
the price of stamps goes up and up. i think stamps used to cost a penny. |
|
i think stamps used to cost a penny. that was a long time ago. |
|
that was a long time ago. it was before i was born. |
|
it was before i was born. now a stamp is 42 cents. |
|
now a stamp is 42 cents. but in may it will be 44 cents. |
|
but in may it will be 44 cents. have you ever lost a letter in the mail? |
|
have you ever lost a letter in the mail? no, i haven't. |
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no, i haven't. neither have i. |
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neither have i. so, they do a good job for the money. |
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so, they do a good job for the money. yes, they do. |
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yes, they do. maybe we shouldn't complain. |
|
a button came off my shirt. what are you going to do? |
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what are you going to do? first, i have to find the button. |
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first, i have to find the button. where did you lose it? |
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where did you lose it? i have no idea. |
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i have no idea. a button is hard to find. did you look in your pant cuffs? |
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a button is hard to find. did you look in your pant cuffs? that's a good idea. |
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that's a good idea. i found a button in my pant cuffs one time. |
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i found a button in my pant cuffs one time. let me look. no, it's not there. |
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let me look. no, it's not there. many shirts come with an extra button. |
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many shirts come with an extra button. you're right. this one does have an extra button. |
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you're right. this one does have an extra button. now all you have to do is sew it on. |
|
i have to go to the bathroom. you drink too much coffee. |
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you drink too much coffee. but i love coffee. |
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but i love coffee. well, it's your life. |
|
well, it's your life. you eat too much chocolate. |
|
you eat too much chocolate. i don't think so. |
|
i don't think so. have you looked in the mirror? |
|
have you looked in the mirror? do you think i'm getting fat? |
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do you think i'm getting fat? i didn't say that. |
|
i didn't say that. what did you say? |
|
what did you say? i said i have to go to the bathroom. |
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i said i have to go to the bathroom. that's what i thought you said. |
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did you do the laundry? yes, i did. |
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yes, i did. what did you wash? |
|
what did you wash? i washed the sheets and towels. |
|
i washed the sheets and towels. what about the pillowcases? |
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what about the pillowcases? yes, i took them off the pillows and washed them. |
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yes, i took them off the pillows and washed them. did you dry everything in the dryer? |
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did you dry everything in the dryer? yes, i dried everything in the dryer. |
|
yes, i dried everything in the dryer. then what did you do? |
|
then what did you do? i folded all the towels. |
|
i folded all the towels. did you put the sheets on the beds? |
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did you put the sheets on the beds? yes, and i put the pillowcases on the pillows. |
|
do you listen to the radio? i listen day and night. |
|
i listen day and night. what do you listen to? |
|
what do you listen to? mostly talk radio. |
|
mostly talk radio. what's that? |
|
what's that? people talk about current events. |
|
people talk about current events. what do they say? |
|
what do they say? they say they want change. |
|
they say they want change. what kind of change? |
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what kind of change? they want tax cuts. |
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they want tax cuts. why do they want tax cuts? |
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why do they want tax cuts? because tax cuts will save them money. |
|
mom, i'm hungry. look in the fridge. |
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look in the fridge. i'm looking. there's nothing to eat. |
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i'm looking. there's nothing to eat. are you sure? |
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are you sure? it's almost empty. |
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it's almost empty. i went to the market yesterday. |
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i went to the market yesterday. i don't see anything. |
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i don't see anything. i bought lots of oranges and apples. |
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i bought lots of oranges and apples. i don't want fruit. i want something tasty. |
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i don't want fruit. i want something tasty. eat the fruit. it's good for you. |
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eat the fruit. it's good for you. next time you go to the market, let me go with you. |
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next time you go to the market, let me go with you. no, thank you. all you want to eat are hot dogs and candy bars. |
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what is there to eat? i don't know. look in the fridge. |
|
i don't know. look in the fridge. i think i'll make a sandwich. |
|
i think i'll make a sandwich. what kind? |
|
what kind? a ham sandwich. |
|
a ham sandwich. the bread is in the cabinet. |
|
the bread is in the cabinet. where's the mustard? |
|
where's the mustard? it's in the fridge, i think. |
|
it's in the fridge, i think. oh, yes, here it is. do you want a sandwich? |
|
oh, yes, here it is. do you want a sandwich? yes, that sounds nice. |
|
yes, that sounds nice. how about some potato chips? |
|
how about some potato chips? yes. and a pickle, if we have any. |
|
it's time for your bath, young lady. but, mom, i'm not dirty. |
|
but, mom, i'm not dirty. you need a bath every day. |
|
you need a bath every day. why? |
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why? because you don't want to smell bad. |
|
because you don't want to smell bad. i don't smell bad. |
|
i don't smell bad. that's what you think. |
|
that's what you think. if i smelled bad, i could smell me. |
|
if i smelled bad, i could smell me. i can smell you. |
|
i can smell you. i can smell you, too. |
|
i can smell you, too. that's my perfume. |
|
that's my perfume. when can i wear perfume? |
|
something's wrong with my computer. exactly what? |
|
exactly what? all i get is a black screen. |
|
all i get is a black screen. what's the matter? |
|
what's the matter? i think i know, because this happened before. |
|
i think i know, because this happened before. what happened before? |
|
what happened before? my hard drive crashed. |
|
my hard drive crashed. oh, no. that's bad news. |
|
oh, no. that's bad news. it sure is, but i'm going to call hp first, just to make sure. |
|
it sure is, but i'm going to call hp first, just to make sure. will you lose all your files? |
|
will you lose all your files? no, i always back up my files. |
|
no, i always back up my files. you're smart. |
|
i called hp about my computer. what did they say? |
|
what did they say? they said i need a new hard drive. |
|
they said i need a new hard drive. that's too bad. how much is a new one? |
|
that's too bad. how much is a new one? it's not too much, only about $85. |
|
it's not too much, only about $85. plus installation? |
|
plus installation? no, my hard drive is easy to remove and replace. |
|
no, my hard drive is easy to remove and replace. really? |
|
really? yes, it's just a couple of screws. |
|
yes, it's just a couple of screws. that's nice. |
|
that's nice. it's a lot better than paying someone $60. |
|
it's a lot better than paying someone $60. if my hard drive crashes, i'll just call you. |
|
what's your email address? it's bluedog123. |
|
it's bluedog123. bluedog123. are you sure that's all? |
|
bluedog123. are you sure that's all? yes. |
|
yes. no. that's incomplete. |
|
no. that's incomplete. what do you mean? |
|
what do you mean? what's your mailing address? |
|
what's your mailing address? 456 cherry drive, pasadena, ca 91170. |
|
456 cherry drive, pasadena, ca 91170. that's correct. |
|
that's correct. so what's the problem? |
|
so what's the problem? bluedog123 is just the street. you have to give me the city, state, and zip code. |
|
bluedog123 is just the street. you have to give me the city, state, and zip code. oh, i get it. my email address is bluedog123@yahoo.com. |
|
i'm going to take a nap. you should unplug the phone. |
|
you should unplug the phone. that's a good idea. |
|
that's a good idea. do you want me to wake you in an hour? |
|
do you want me to wake you in an hour? no, thanks. just let me sleep until i wake up. |
|
no, thanks. just let me sleep until i wake up. i'll start dinner at 6:00. |
|
i'll start dinner at 6:00. okay. i think i'll be awake by then. |
|
okay. i think i'll be awake by then. if not, your nose will wake you up. |
|
if not, your nose will wake you up. you mean i will smell the food cooking? |
|
you mean i will smell the food cooking? you might even dream about dinner. |
|
you might even dream about dinner. i don't think i'm going to dream about anything. i'm really tired. |
|
i don't think i'm going to dream about anything. i'm really tired. have a nice nap. |
|
that was a nice funeral. yes, dad, it was. |
|
yes, dad, it was. the son gave a nice speech about his father. |
|
the son gave a nice speech about his father. it was long, too. |
|
it was long, too. i think it was about 45 minutes long. |
|
i think it was about 45 minutes long. but it went by fast. it was interesting. |
|
but it went by fast. it was interesting. i liked it. |
|
i liked it. i'll give you a speech like that, too. |
|
i'll give you a speech like that, too. do you think anyone will come to my funeral? |
|
do you think anyone will come to my funeral? of course. |
|
of course. i think only the family will be there. |
|
i think only the family will be there. you have lots of friends. they will be there, too! |
|
yikes! what was that noise? i had to blow my nose. |
|
i had to blow my nose. did you have to blow right next to the phone? |
|
did you have to blow right next to the phone? did you hear that? |
|
did you hear that? of course i heard that. i thought a plane had crashed into your house. |
|
of course i heard that. i thought a plane had crashed into your house. it wasn't that loud. |
|
it wasn't that loud. i will blow my nose sometime for you, and you'll see. |
|
i will blow my nose sometime for you, and you'll see. okay. i'll take your word for it. |
|
okay. i'll take your word for it. i thought you had an elephant in your house. |
|
i thought you had an elephant in your house. you're funny. |
|
you're funny. what did you say? i think i've gone deaf. |
|
what did you say? i think i've gone deaf. i'm going into the bathroom to blow my nose. i'll be right back. |
|
i have lots of friends. really? how many do you have? |
|
really? how many do you have? i don't know, maybe one hundred. |
|
i don't know, maybe one hundred. that is a lot of friends. do you have a best friend? |
|
that is a lot of friends. do you have a best friend? of course. i have lots of best friends. |
|
of course. i have lots of best friends. how many best friends do you have? |
|
how many best friends do you have? i think about twenty-five. |
|
i think about twenty-five. hmm. i have only one best friend. |
|
hmm. i have only one best friend. i feel sorry for you. |
|
i feel sorry for you. i have only a few friends. |
|
i have only a few friends. you must be lonely. i will share my friends with you. |
|
you must be lonely. i will share my friends with you. that's very nice of you. |
|
don't you ever cheat on me. why would i do that? |
|
why would i do that? because men like to cheat. |
|
because men like to cheat. some men do, but not me. |
|
some men do, but not me. i'm watching you. |
|
i'm watching you. i'm an open book. watch me all you want. |
|
i'm an open book. watch me all you want. if i catch you, you'll be sorry. |
|
if i catch you, you'll be sorry. you won't catch me, because i love you. i'm not a cheater. |
|
you won't catch me, because i love you. i'm not a cheater. i will poke your eyes out. |
|
i will poke your eyes out. i don't want any other woman. |
|
i don't want any other woman. i will chop your toes off, one by one. |
|
i will chop your toes off, one by one. honey, please. you're the only woman for me, forever. i swear it. |
|
i hate to go outside. me too. |
|
me too. why do you hate to go outside? |
|
why do you hate to go outside? i meet too many jerks. |
|
i meet too many jerks. i agree. |
|
i agree. this city is full of jerks. |
|
this city is full of jerks. rude people are everywhere. |
|
rude people are everywhere. but what can you do? |
|
but what can you do? you can yell at them. |
|
you can yell at them. and they will yell back at you. |
|
and they will yell back at you. yelling doesn't do any good. |
|
yelling doesn't do any good. no. the best thing to do is just stay home. |
|
will you look at this form? are you having problems with it? |
|
are you having problems with it? i don't understand some things. |
|
i don't understand some things. let me help you. |
|
let me help you. what does "mi" mean? |
|
what does "mi" mean? "mi" stands for middle initial. |
|
"mi" stands for middle initial. what does "mm/dd/yy" mean? |
|
what does "mm/dd/yy" mean? that means month/day/year. use numbers. |
|
that means month/day/year. use numbers. i don't understand. |
|
i don't understand. for example, if your birth date is january 12, 1987, write 01/12/87. |
|
for example, if your birth date is january 12, 1987, write 01/12/87. oh. that's simple enough. |
|
oh. that's simple enough. always print clearly, and fill in the bubbles completely. |
|
let's go to the animal shelter. what do you want to do? |
|
what do you want to do? i want to get a puppy for my son. |
|
i want to get a puppy for my son. that will make him so happy. |
|
that will make him so happy. i'll get him one of those little dogs. |
|
i'll get him one of those little dogs. one that won't grow up too big. |
|
one that won't grow up too big. and eat too much. |
|
and eat too much. do you know which one he would like? |
|
do you know which one he would like? oh, yes, i took him there yesterday. he showed me one that he really liked. |
|
oh, yes, i took him there yesterday. he showed me one that he really liked. i bet you had to drag him away. |
|
i bet you had to drag him away. he wanted to take it home yesterday. |
|
he wanted to take it home yesterday. i wonder what he'll name it. |
|
what's the weather like? i don't know. i just woke up. |
|
i don't know. i just woke up. why don't you look outside? |
|
why don't you look outside? okay. it looks like rain. |
|
okay. it looks like rain. why do you say that? |
|
why do you say that? the sky is gray. |
|
the sky is gray. is it raining right now? |
|
is it raining right now? no. |
|
no. how do you know? |
|
how do you know? the street isn't wet. |
|
the street isn't wet. i have to go shopping today. |
|
i have to go shopping today. you'd better take an umbrella. |
|
i can't believe how hot it is. it's not even noon yet. |
|
it's not even noon yet. that means it will get hotter. |
|
that means it will get hotter. i am dying from the heat. |
|
i am dying from the heat. turn on the air conditioner. |
|
turn on the air conditioner. it doesn't work. |
|
it doesn't work. what happened? |
|
what happened? i don't know. |
|
i don't know. did you call the repairman? |
|
did you call the repairman? of course. |
|
of course. when is he coming? |
|
when is he coming? he's busy. he said next week. |
|
i'll be glad when winter comes. why is that? |
|
why is that? because i love the snow. |
|
because i love the snow. yes, the snow is fun. |
|
yes, the snow is fun. last year we made a big snowman. |
|
last year we made a big snowman. how big was it? |
|
how big was it? it was seven feet tall. |
|
it was seven feet tall. how long did it take? |
|
how long did it take? it took us all day. |
|
it took us all day. did you give him a nose? |
|
did you give him a nose? of course. we gave him a big carrot for a nose. |
|
of course. we gave him a big carrot for a nose. let me help you make one this year. |
|
i'm going to the bank. what do you need to do? |
|
what do you need to do? i need to withdraw some money. |
|
i need to withdraw some money. how are you going to do that? |
|
how are you going to do that? i'll just use the atm. |
|
i'll just use the atm. what's that? |
|
what's that? it's the automatic teller machine. |
|
it's the automatic teller machine. it gives you money? |
|
it gives you money? i just insert my debit card into the machine. |
|
i just insert my debit card into the machine. and it gives you money? |
|
and it gives you money? well, it gives me money, but it's my own money. |
|
well, it gives me money, but it's my own money. oh. what good is that? i thought it gave you free money. |
|
did you put the blue bin out on the street? oh, no. i forgot. |
|
oh, no. i forgot. well, you'd better take it out front. |
|
well, you'd better take it out front. what time does the recycle truck come by? |
|
what time does the recycle truck come by? it usually gets here at noon on tuesday, which is tomorrow. |
|
it usually gets here at noon on tuesday, which is tomorrow. i'll just take it out to the street tomorrow morning. |
|
i'll just take it out to the street tomorrow morning. oh, no, you don't. |
|
oh, no, you don't. what do you mean? |
|
what do you mean? every morning you get up late and rush off to work late. |
|
every morning you get up late and rush off to work late. do you think i'll forget to do it? |
|
do you think i'll forget to do it? you'll remember to do it, but you won't have time to do it. |
|
you'll remember to do it, but you won't have time to do it. okay, i'll take it out front right now. |
|
are you ready? ready for what? |
|
ready for what? ready for the big switch. |
|
ready for the big switch. what are you talking about? |
|
what are you talking about? the nation is switching to digital tv. |
|
the nation is switching to digital tv. oh. of course i'm ready. |
|
oh. of course i'm ready. did you buy the converter? |
|
did you buy the converter? no, i don't need a converter because i bought a digital tv. |
|
no, i don't need a converter because i bought a digital tv. how much was that? |
|
how much was that? it was only about $120 for a 13-inch screen. |
|
it was only about $120 for a 13-inch screen. does it pick up any digital channels? |
|
does it pick up any digital channels? oh, yes. i get six korean channels but nothing in english! |
|
people are funny. they sure are. |
|
they sure are. did you hear about the pilot? |
|
did you hear about the pilot? the one that stole a small plane? |
|
the one that stole a small plane? yes, he stole a plane in canada and flew into the u.s. |
|
yes, he stole a plane in canada and flew into the u.s. did they catch him? |
|
did they catch him? yes. after two u.s. fighter jets followed him for an hour, he landed on a highway. |
|
yes. after two u.s. fighter jets followed him for an hour, he landed on a highway. did he crash? |
|
did he crash? no, he just landed the plane and walked to a restaurant. |
|
no, he just landed the plane and walked to a restaurant. did the cops find out why he flew into the u.s.? |
|
did the cops find out why he flew into the u.s.? his life sucked. he was hoping a fighter jet would shoot him down. |
|
his life sucked. he was hoping a fighter jet would shoot him down. poor guy. |
|
the police need our help finding a robber. how do you know? |
|
how do you know? the tv news is reporting a bank robbery. |
|
the tv news is reporting a bank robbery. do they know what the robber looks like? |
|
do they know what the robber looks like? yes, he's 6 feet tall, 200 pounds, black hair, and about 30 years old. |
|
yes, he's 6 feet tall, 200 pounds, black hair, and about 30 years old. what race is he? |
|
what race is he? they didn't say. |
|
they didn't say. the tv news doesn't tell us the race anymore. |
|
the tv news doesn't tell us the race anymore. of course not. that would be racist. |
|
of course not. that would be racist. but how can we identify someone if we don't know their race? |
|
but how can we identify someone if we don't know their race? don't ask me. |
|
don't ask me. then they also shouldn't tell us if the robber is male or female, because that is sexist. |
|
don't wipe your nose on your sleeve. but i don't have a tissue. |
|
but i don't have a tissue. then go find a tissue in the bathroom. |
|
then go find a tissue in the bathroom. i didn't have time to get one from there. |
|
i didn't have time to get one from there. your sleeves are not tissues. |
|
your sleeves are not tissues. but mom, all my friends use their sleeves. |
|
but mom, all my friends use their sleeves. that doesn't make it right. |
|
that doesn't make it right. i saw dad wipe his nose on his sleeve yesterday. |
|
i saw dad wipe his nose on his sleeve yesterday. i will talk to your father about that. |
|
i will talk to your father about that. i bet dad did it all the time when he was my age. |
|
i bet dad did it all the time when he was my age. your daddy was a good little boy. |
|
your daddy was a good little boy. how do you know? were you his mommy, too? |
|
i'm worried. worried about what? |
|
worried about what? i'm getting married. |
|
i'm getting married. you should be happy, not worried. |
|
you should be happy, not worried. i am happy, but marriage is a lot of responsibility. |
|
i am happy, but marriage is a lot of responsibility. yes, you have to take care of your wife. |
|
yes, you have to take care of your wife. and i have to take care of our children. |
|
and i have to take care of our children. are you going to start a family? |
|
are you going to start a family? yes. we want to have a little boy and a little girl. |
|
yes. we want to have a little boy and a little girl. that sounds wonderful. |
|
that sounds wonderful. except we can't afford it! |
|
except we can't afford it! no wonder you're worried. |
|
i don't get art. or artists. |
|
or artists. they're in a different world. |
|
they're in a different world. i saw a painting of a jar that was full of pencils. |
|
i saw a painting of a jar that was full of pencils. the artist said the jar was both full and empty. |
|
the artist said the jar was both full and empty. but it was full of pencils! how could he say it was empty? |
|
but it was full of pencils! how could he say it was empty? artists see things differently. |
|
artists see things differently. did you ever see anything that picasso painted? |
|
did you ever see anything that picasso painted? of course! he's world famous. |
|
of course! he's world famous. did he ever take art lessons? |
|
did he ever take art lessons? i can't believe it. i drew paintings like that in third grade. |
|
i can't believe it. i drew paintings like that in third grade. where are they? maybe they are worth millions. |
|
what's the point? the point of what? |
|
the point of what? of living. |
|
of living. who knows? you live, and then you die. |
|
who knows? you live, and then you die. we must be here for some reason. |
|
we must be here for some reason. maybe we're here to have fun. |
|
maybe we're here to have fun. then why aren't i having fun? |
|
then why aren't i having fun? because you're thinking too much. |
|
because you're thinking too much. so i should stop thinking? |
|
so i should stop thinking? stop thinking about what the point is. |
|
stop thinking about what the point is. okay. i'll start thinking about having some fun. |
|
okay. i'll start thinking about having some fun. just be patient. fun doesn't come along every five minutes. |
|
beer is a powerful drug. so are cigarettes. |
|
so are cigarettes. which would you prefer? |
|
which would you prefer? what do you mean? |
|
what do you mean? when you die and go to heaven, they will offer you beer or cigarettes. |
|
when you die and go to heaven, they will offer you beer or cigarettes. i could pick only one or the other? |
|
i could pick only one or the other? yes. nothing's perfect, not even in heaven. |
|
yes. nothing's perfect, not even in heaven. boy, that's a tough one. |
|
boy, that's a tough one. what's so tough about it? of course, i would pick cigarettes. |
|
what's so tough about it? of course, i would pick cigarettes. but cigarettes taste much better when you have a cold beer. |
|
but cigarettes taste much better when you have a cold beer. well, you can't have everything. |
|
well, you can't have everything. i don't think i want to go to your heaven. |
|
my pants have a hole in the front pocket. you shouldn't carry pens in your pocket. |
|
you shouldn't carry pens in your pocket. yesterday a pen fell through my pants onto my shoe. |
|
yesterday a pen fell through my pants onto my shoe. lucky for you it wasn't a sharp knife. |
|
lucky for you it wasn't a sharp knife. who carries a sharp knife in their pocket? |
|
who carries a sharp knife in their pocket? criminals, of course. |
|
criminals, of course. anyway, i have to fix the hole. |
|
anyway, i have to fix the hole. you can sew it up or use an iron-on patch. |
|
you can sew it up or use an iron-on patch. tell me about this patch. |
|
tell me about this patch. the patch has glue. the hot iron melts the glue so the patch sticks on. |
|
the patch has glue. the hot iron melts the glue so the patch sticks on. that sounds a lot easier than sewing. |
|
that sounds a lot easier than sewing. it is. but after about ten washings, the glue washes off. |
|
do you know any good jokes? i can't remember jokes. |
|
i can't remember jokes. neither can i. |
|
neither can i. they go in one ear and out the other. |
|
they go in one ear and out the other. who makes up all these jokes? |
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who makes up all these jokes? who knows? but there must be a hundred new ones every day. |
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who knows? but there must be a hundred new ones every day. yes, just in english alone. |
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yes, just in english alone. i wonder if every language has jokes. |
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i wonder if every language has jokes. of course! people everywhere like good jokes. |
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of course! people everywhere like good jokes. what do you think people joke about the most? |
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what do you think people joke about the most? i think most jokes are about women. |
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i think most jokes are about women. oh, really? i think most jokes are about men! |
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you're very lucky. why do you say that? |
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why do you say that? you speak two languages. |
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you speak two languages. well, my english isn't perfect. |
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well, my english isn't perfect. no one speaks perfect english. |
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no one speaks perfect english. maybe i will be the first! |
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maybe i will be the first! i've been thinking about learning spanish. |
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i've been thinking about learning spanish. spanish is easy. i'll be happy to teach you. |
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spanish is easy. i'll be happy to teach you. how long will it take me to learn? |
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how long will it take me to learn? i think it will only take you a year or two. |
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i think it will only take you a year or two. how soon can we begin? |
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how soon can we begin? ahora! that means right now. |
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do you know what today is? yes, it's april 22. |
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yes, it's april 22. it's more than just a date. |
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it's more than just a date. is it your birthday or anniversary? |
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is it your birthday or anniversary? no, it's earth day. |
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no, it's earth day. what's that? |
|
what's that? it's a yearly reminder to take care of our planet. |
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it's a yearly reminder to take care of our planet. oh, you mean like reuse things and recycle stuff? |
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oh, you mean like reuse things and recycle stuff? yes. we need to think green, save water, and stop using plastic bags. |
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yes. we need to think green, save water, and stop using plastic bags. how about if i take shorter showers? |
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how about if i take shorter showers? that's a good idea, because showers waste a lot of water. |
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that's a good idea, because showers waste a lot of water. from now on i'll spend only 20 minutes in the shower. |
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poetry sucks. i don't know anyone who likes it. |
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i don't know anyone who likes it. some of it is okay, i guess. |
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some of it is okay, i guess. yes, the poems that rhyme and are easy to remember. |
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yes, the poems that rhyme and are easy to remember. like "one, two, buckle my shoe." |
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like "one, two, buckle my shoe." but people still write poems. |
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but people still write poems. no one makes any money at it. |
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no one makes any money at it. shakespeare was a poet. |
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shakespeare was a poet. did he get rich from his poetry? |
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did he get rich from his poetry? probably not. |
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probably not. poems are a little bit like songs. |
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poems are a little bit like songs. yes, but songs have music. without music, songs would suck, too. |
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how smart are you? i don't know. i think i'm average. |
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i don't know. i think i'm average. did you ever take an iq test? |
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did you ever take an iq test? no, i never did. all i know is that i got a's and b's in school. |
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no, i never did. all i know is that i got a's and b's in school. i wish i was really smart. |
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i wish i was really smart. don't be ridiculous. |
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don't be ridiculous. what do you mean? |
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what do you mean? if you're going to make a wish, wish that you were really rich or famous. |
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if you're going to make a wish, wish that you were really rich or famous. don't you ever wonder what it's like to be super-smart? |
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don't you ever wonder what it's like to be super-smart? it must be very lonely. |
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it must be very lonely. why's that? |
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why's that? because if you're super-smart, no one understands what you're saying. |
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i missed the tv news last night. what was on? nothing that would pass as news. |
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nothing that would pass as news. what's the weather going to be like this weekend? |
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what's the weather going to be like this weekend? i don't know. whenever the weather comes on, i switch channels. |
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i don't know. whenever the weather comes on, i switch channels. what was the lead story on the news? |
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what was the lead story on the news? some actress was in court for driving without a license. |
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some actress was in court for driving without a license. what was the second story? |
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what was the second story? some actor married a woman young enough to be his daughter. |
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some actor married a woman young enough to be his daughter. what was the third story? |
|
what was the third story? a bull chased a man in a supermarket. |
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a bull chased a man in a supermarket. wasn't there anything about octo-mom? |
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wasn't there anything about octo-mom? of course. she's going to hire a nanny for her eight infants. |
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what are you going to do about your death? well, mostly i'll try to avoid it. |
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well, mostly i'll try to avoid it. i mean, are you going to get buried or cremated? |
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i mean, are you going to get buried or cremated? my wife and i will be cremated. |
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my wife and i will be cremated. are you going to be buried next to each other? |
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are you going to be buried next to each other? oh, no. our ashes will be shaken into the ocean. |
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oh, no. our ashes will be shaken into the ocean. you're not going to be buried? |
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you're not going to be buried? a coffin costs too much and takes up too much space. |
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a coffin costs too much and takes up too much space. yes, but it will be in a cemetery where your children can visit you. |
|
yes, but it will be in a cemetery where your children can visit you. children seldom visit their parents in a cemetery. |
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children seldom visit their parents in a cemetery. that's true. a cemetery is for dead people, not living people. |
|
that's true. a cemetery is for dead people, not living people. we figure our kids can visit us whenever they go to the beach. |
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did you wipe your feet? yes, of course i wiped my feet. |
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yes, of course i wiped my feet. then why is there mud on the carpet? |
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then why is there mud on the carpet? i don't know. it's not my mud. |
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i don't know. it's not my mud. well, someone brought it into the house. |
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well, someone brought it into the house. look at the bottom of my shoesthey're clean. |
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look at the bottom of my shoesthey're clean. of course they're clean. you left all the mud on the carpet. |
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of course they're clean. you left all the mud on the carpet. okay, i'll get the vacuum cleaner. |
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okay, i'll get the vacuum cleaner. don't vacuum it now. |
|
don't vacuum it now. don't you want me to clean up the mud? |
|
don't you want me to clean up the mud? wait till it dries. it will be easier to vacuum. |
|
wait till it dries. it will be easier to vacuum. next time i will be more careful. |
|
what are you getting for your mom? what are you talking about? |
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what are you talking about? sunday is mother's day. |
|
sunday is mother's day. this sunday? |
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this sunday? of course. it's all over the news. |
|
of course. it's all over the news. i thought it was next sunday. |
|
i thought it was next sunday. well, you'd better get her something. |
|
well, you'd better get her something. i'll get her a nice card. |
|
i'll get her a nice card. is that it? |
|
is that it? yes. that's all i ever give her. |
|
yes. that's all i ever give her. she raised you, and all you ever give her is a card? |
|
she raised you, and all you ever give her is a card? it's okay. she knows that i love her. |
|
i don't like our flag. what's the matter with it? |
|
what's the matter with it? it's too much like other flags. |
|
it's too much like other flags. yes, a lot of flags have stripes. |
|
yes, a lot of flags have stripes. a flag should be pretty. |
|
a flag should be pretty. what should our flag look like? |
|
what should our flag look like? it should have a pretty woman on it. |
|
it should have a pretty woman on it. that's ridiculous! |
|
that's ridiculous! you don't like pretty women? |
|
you don't like pretty women? of course i do. but not on our flag! |
|
of course i do. but not on our flag! every nation should have a pretty woman on their flag. |
|
every nation should have a pretty woman on their flag. you can't go to war carrying a flag with a woman on it! |
|
i had a busy morning. what did you do? |
|
what did you do? i watered all the plants. |
|
i watered all the plants. you have a lot of plants. |
|
you have a lot of plants. then i did my laundry. |
|
then i did my laundry. that takes some time. |
|
that takes some time. i took the dog for a walk. |
|
i took the dog for a walk. i'll bet he enjoyed his walk. |
|
i'll bet he enjoyed his walk. i vacuumed the entire house. |
|
i vacuumed the entire house. that's a lot of work. |
|
that's a lot of work. and then i made lunch. |
|
and then i made lunch. i'll bet you were hungry! |
|
i don't have long distance service with my home phone. so how do you make long distance calls? |
|
so how do you make long distance calls? i use a calling card. |
|
i use a calling card. where do you get that? |
|
where do you get that? i buy it at the dollar store. |
|
i buy it at the dollar store. how much is it? |
|
how much is it? it's one dollar for 100 minutes. |
|
it's one dollar for 100 minutes. that's only a penny a minute! |
|
that's only a penny a minute! it's a great price. but you have to dial a lot of numbers. |
|
it's a great price. but you have to dial a lot of numbers. how many? |
|
how many? first you dial seven numbers, then ten numbers, then ten more numbers. |
|
first you dial seven numbers, then ten numbers, then ten more numbers. yikes. i think i'll keep my long distance service. |
|
do you go to college? yes, i do. |
|
yes, i do. what college do you go to? |
|
what college do you go to? i go to pasadena city college. |
|
i go to pasadena city college. do you like it? |
|
do you like it? oh, yes, i really like it. |
|
oh, yes, i really like it. why do you like it? |
|
why do you like it? because it has great teachers. |
|
because it has great teachers. what else? |
|
what else? i like all my classmates, too. |
|
i like all my classmates, too. anything else? |
|
anything else? yes. it's not expensive! |
|
i lost my new pen. where did you lose it? |
|
where did you lose it? i don't know. |
|
i don't know. when did you lose it? |
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when did you lose it? i think i lost it today. i used it yesterday. |
|
i think i lost it today. i used it yesterday. did you check all your pockets? |
|
did you check all your pockets? i checked all my pockets. |
|
i checked all my pockets. did you look in your desk? |
|
did you look in your desk? yes. it isn't there, either. |
|
yes. it isn't there, either. it's probably around somewhere. |
|
it's probably around somewhere. oh, well, it only cost me a dollar. |
|
oh, well, it only cost me a dollar. only a dollar? don't even look for it. |
|
gravity is very important. what is gravity? |
|
what is gravity? it's the force that pulls everything down. |
|
it's the force that pulls everything down. i don't understand. |
|
i don't understand. if you pour water into a glass, the water goes down into the glass. |
|
if you pour water into a glass, the water goes down into the glass. of course it does. |
|
of course it does. without gravity, the water would go up. |
|
without gravity, the water would go up. you're joking. |
|
you're joking. without gravity, you would go up. |
|
without gravity, you would go up. what do you mean? |
|
what do you mean? you would float into the sky like a balloon. |
|
you would float into the sky like a balloon. that would be fun! |
|
i can't read my book. turn on the light. |
|
turn on the light. the light is on. |
|
the light is on. open the book. |
|
open the book. the book is open. |
|
the book is open. see an eye doctor. |
|
see an eye doctor. that's what i need to do. |
|
that's what i need to do. he'll give you a prescription for glasses. |
|
he'll give you a prescription for glasses. i'll make an appointment tomorrow. |
|
i'll make an appointment tomorrow. i'll get the yellow pages for an eye doctor. |
|
i'll get the yellow pages for an eye doctor. read the phone number to me. |
|
read the phone number to me. i'll read it very loud, in case your hearing is getting bad, too. |
|
what do you need for school? i need pencils. |
|
i need pencils. anything else? |
|
anything else? i need a notebook. |
|
i need a notebook. do you need a pen? |
|
do you need a pen? no. i already have a pen. |
|
no. i already have a pen. do you need a calculator? |
|
do you need a calculator? no. the teacher doesn't permit calculators. |
|
no. the teacher doesn't permit calculators. how about a dictionary? |
|
how about a dictionary? no, we have a big dictionary in the classroom. |
|
no, we have a big dictionary in the classroom. well, i guess that's it. |
|
well, i guess that's it. yes, that's all i need for now. |
|
i like this magazine. so do i. |
|
so do i. i read it once, and i subscribed. |
|
i read it once, and i subscribed. it gives you all the news. |
|
it gives you all the news. all the news in only 50 pages. |
|
all the news in only 50 pages. i like the political cartoons. |
|
i like the political cartoons. i like the beautiful photos of the houses for sale. |
|
i like the beautiful photos of the houses for sale. i always read the film reviews. |
|
i always read the film reviews. i never miss the food and drink section. |
|
i never miss the food and drink section. i gave a subscription to my parents. |
|
i gave a subscription to my parents. me too. they canceled their other news magazines. |
|
me too. they canceled their other news magazines. so did mine! |
|
my pen is out of ink. shake it a couple of times. |
|
shake it a couple of times. i shook it. there is no more ink. |
|
i shook it. there is no more ink. you can borrow mine. |
|
you can borrow mine. thank you. i'll buy a new one tomorrow. |
|
thank you. i'll buy a new one tomorrow. what were you doing? |
|
what were you doing? i was writing a letter. |
|
i was writing a letter. who were you writing to? |
|
who were you writing to? it's to my mom. |
|
it's to my mom. tell her i said hello. |
|
tell her i said hello. okay. i'll return your pen when i'm done. |
|
okay. i'll return your pen when i'm done. take your time. |
|
have you done your homework? not yet. |
|
not yet. then why are you watching tv? |
|
then why are you watching tv? this is my favorite show. |
|
this is my favorite show. go do your homework. |
|
go do your homework. but, mom! |
|
but, mom! you can watch tv after you do your homework. |
|
you can watch tv after you do your homework. but the show will be over. |
|
but the show will be over. there will be another show next week. |
|
there will be another show next week. please? |
|
please? you know the rules. |
|
you know the rules. i hate the rules! i can't wait till i grow up. |
|
i can't wait until i graduate. me too. |
|
me too. no more homework. |
|
no more homework. i hate homework. |
|
i hate homework. are you going to college? |
|
are you going to college? i can't afford it. |
|
i can't afford it. me neither. |
|
me neither. so what are you going to do? |
|
so what are you going to do? i'm joining the army. |
|
i'm joining the army. you're kidding. you might get killed. |
|
you're kidding. you might get killed. i don't think so. after i finish, i'll have enough money to go to college. |
|
i don't think so. after i finish, i'll have enough money to go to college. that's not a bad idea. |
|
what is your major? english. |
|
english. what are you going to do with an english major? |
|
what are you going to do with an english major? i'm going to be a teacher. |
|
i'm going to be a teacher. high school or middle school? |
|
high school or middle school? high school. |
|
high school. i teach high school english. |
|
i teach high school english. i didn't know that. |
|
i didn't know that. i started teaching five years ago. |
|
i started teaching five years ago. how do you like it? |
|
how do you like it? do you see all this gray hair? it was totally black five years ago. |
|
do you see all this gray hair? it was totally black five years ago. maybe i'll teach middle school. |
|
parking at school is impossible. i'll say. |
|
i'll say. i drove around for half an hour. |
|
i drove around for half an hour. did you find a spot? |
|
did you find a spot? i found a spot, but someone cut in and took it from me. |
|
i found a spot, but someone cut in and took it from me. did you yell at them? |
|
did you yell at them? yes, i did. |
|
yes, i did. and? |
|
and? and he yelled back at me. |
|
and he yelled back at me. how rude. |
|
how rude. but i got lucky a few minutes later. |
|
but i got lucky a few minutes later. you have to be lucky to find a parking space. |
|
this is a huge library. yes, it has lots of rooms and lots of space. |
|
yes, it has lots of rooms and lots of space. and lots of books. |
|
and lots of books. and lots of thieves. |
|
and lots of thieves. what do you mean? |
|
what do you mean? i mean, keep your belongings close to you. |
|
i mean, keep your belongings close to you. the only thing in my backpack is used books. |
|
the only thing in my backpack is used books. but thieves don't know that. |
|
but thieves don't know that. they might think that i've got an ipod or laptop in there. |
|
they might think that i've got an ipod or laptop in there. now you're thinking. |
|
now you're thinking. you'd think a library would be safe from thieves. |
|
you'd think a library would be safe from thieves. not even a church is safe from thieves. |
|
how good is your math? i can add two and two. |
|
i can add two and two. so you're not very good at math? |
|
so you're not very good at math? i'm terrible at math. |
|
i'm terrible at math. well, i need some help. |
|
well, i need some help. with what? |
|
with what? i'm taking a math course in school. |
|
i'm taking a math course in school. well, you should ask your teacher or your classmates for help. |
|
well, you should ask your teacher or your classmates for help. i can't do that. |
|
i can't do that. why not? |
|
why not? they might think i'm stupid. |
|
they might think i'm stupid. they're not going to think that! they'll be glad to help you. |
|
do you believe in god? of course. |
|
of course. do you pray to god? |
|
do you pray to god? occasionally. |
|
occasionally. when's that? |
|
when's that? when i need something. |
|
when i need something. like what? |
|
like what? well, if i have a big test at school. |
|
well, if i have a big test at school. does god answer your prayers? |
|
does god answer your prayers? yes, i've passed all my tests. |
|
yes, i've passed all my tests. do you ever pray for money? |
|
do you ever pray for money? not yet. i won't need to do that until i graduate from high school. |
|
the cops finally found the husband. what husband? |
|
what husband? the husband of the driver who ran over two college students at 3 a.m. |
|
the husband of the driver who ran over two college students at 3 a.m. oh, yeah. the girl died instantly, and the boy is still in the hospital. |
|
oh, yeah. the girl died instantly, and the boy is still in the hospital. the husband said he tried to help the boy. |
|
the husband said he tried to help the boy. yes, he pushed him off the hood of the car. |
|
yes, he pushed him off the hood of the car. no, he said he gently placed the boy on the street. |
|
no, he said he gently placed the boy on the street. so what? they still drove off. |
|
so what? they still drove off. the husband said a fire department was nearby. |
|
the husband said a fire department was nearby. so what? did he dial 911? |
|
so what? did he dial 911? he said he was thinking about it, but he didn't get around to it. |
|
he said he was thinking about it, but he didn't get around to it. he didn't get around to turning himself in, either. |
|
i don't like riding the bus. why not? |
|
why not? the seats and windows are dirty. |
|
the seats and windows are dirty. don't they clean the bus every night? |
|
don't they clean the bus every night? i think they do. |
|
i think they do. you should bring some wipes with you. |
|
you should bring some wipes with you. that's a good idea. |
|
that's a good idea. then you can wipe your seat and window. |
|
then you can wipe your seat and window. people will think i'm strange. |
|
people will think i'm strange. who cares? everyone is strange. |
|
who cares? everyone is strange. that's for sure. |
|
that's for sure. don't worry about what people think. |
|
i don't like riding the bus. why not? |
|
why not? number one, it's too slow. |
|
number one, it's too slow. you're right. a car is faster. |
|
you're right. a car is faster. number two, it's usually late. |
|
number two, it's usually late. you're right. the buses are never on time. |
|
you're right. the buses are never on time. number three, it doesn't run 24 hours. |
|
number three, it doesn't run 24 hours. you're right. buses don't run late at night. |
|
you're right. buses don't run late at night. number four, it's too crowded. |
|
number four, it's too crowded. you're right. you have to stand in the aisle. |
|
you're right. you have to stand in the aisle. number five, it's unsafe. |
|
number five, it's unsafe. you're right. bad guys might rob you. |
|
we had a problem at school. what was the problem? |
|
what was the problem? someone cut the tires. |
|
someone cut the tires. what tires? |
|
what tires? the tires on the cars. |
|
the tires on the cars. where were the cars? |
|
where were the cars? they were in the student parking lot. |
|
they were in the student parking lot. how many tires were cut? |
|
how many tires were cut? one or two tires were cut on each car. |
|
one or two tires were cut on each car. how many cars? |
|
how many cars? eleven cars. |
|
eleven cars. that's terrible. i hope they catch the person. |
|
life isn't fair. it sure isn't. |
|
it sure isn't. i got a ticket yesterday. |
|
i got a ticket yesterday. what for? |
|
what for? i was crossing the street. |
|
i was crossing the street. were you in a crosswalk? |
|
were you in a crosswalk? yes, but the red hand was blinking. |
|
yes, but the red hand was blinking. so? that's a ticket? |
|
so? that's a ticket? yes, it's a $140 ticket. |
|
yes, it's a $140 ticket. that's not right! |
|
that's not right! when i started to cross the street, the white walk sign was blinking. |
|
when i started to cross the street, the white walk sign was blinking. you need to walk faster. |
|
you're driving too fast. why do you say that? |
|
why do you say that? the speed limit is 65. |
|
the speed limit is 65. i know that. |
|
i know that. but you're doing 75. |
|
but you're doing 75. so is everyone else. |
|
so is everyone else. but a cop might stop you. |
|
but a cop might stop you. no, he won't. some cars are doing 85. |
|
no, he won't. some cars are doing 85. so the cop will stop those cars? |
|
so the cop will stop those cars? of course. he stops the fastest cars. |
|
of course. he stops the fastest cars. my friend got a ticket for doing 75. |
|
my friend got a ticket for doing 75. your friend was unlucky. |
|
remember to put air in your tires. how often do i have to do that? |
|
how often do i have to do that? once every two months. |
|
once every two months. that's a lot. |
|
that's a lot. what do you mean? |
|
what do you mean? that's six times a year! |
|
that's six times a year! yes, and it takes about five minutes each time. |
|
yes, and it takes about five minutes each time. i'll try. |
|
i'll try. check your tires or you'll get a flat. |
|
check your tires or you'll get a flat. oh. that's not good. |
|
oh. that's not good. no, it isn't. a flat costs you time and money. |
|
no, it isn't. a flat costs you time and money. and i don't have either. |
|
you're driving too fast. i'm in a hurry. |
|
i'm in a hurry. don't ever be in a hurry. |
|
don't ever be in a hurry. it's not my fault. you didn't wake me up. |
|
it's not my fault. you didn't wake me up. that's not my fault. you didn't tell me to wake you up. |
|
that's not my fault. you didn't tell me to wake you up. well, i meant to. |
|
well, i meant to. don't ever be in a hurry when you're driving. |
|
don't ever be in a hurry when you're driving. why not? |
|
why not? because you'll have an accident. most accidents are because people are in a hurry. |
|
because you'll have an accident. most accidents are because people are in a hurry. how do you know that? |
|
how do you know that? i read a lot. |
|
i read a lot. i thought drunks caused most accidents. |
|
let's go for a ride. where are we going? |
|
where are we going? into the mountains. |
|
into the mountains. that sounds nice. |
|
that sounds nice. i want to show you my new car. |
|
i want to show you my new car. you bought a new car? |
|
you bought a new car? yes. i bought a cadillac. |
|
yes. i bought a cadillac. a luxury car. |
|
a luxury car. luxury plus speed. |
|
luxury plus speed. what are we waiting for? |
|
what are we waiting for? let me get the keys. |
|
let me get the keys. let me get my camera. |
|
i have to go to the bathroom. why didn't you go before we left? |
|
why didn't you go before we left? i did, but i have to go again. |
|
i did, but i have to go again. well, hold on a little longer. |
|
well, hold on a little longer. i think i'm going to explode. |
|
i think i'm going to explode. just hold on. |
|
just hold on. oh! don't hit any more bumps! |
|
oh! don't hit any more bumps! we'll be at mcdonald's in just a few minutes. |
|
we'll be at mcdonald's in just a few minutes. i hope they are fast minutes. |
|
i hope they are fast minutes. think about something else. think about a hamburger. |
|
think about something else. think about a hamburger. i'm thinking, but i still have to go. |
|
i'm thinking, but i still have to go. it's the next exit. hold on! |
|
where's the car? what do you mean? |
|
what do you mean? the car isn't here. |
|
the car isn't here. where did you park it? |
|
where did you park it? i parked it right here. |
|
i parked it right here. are you sure? |
|
are you sure? yes. i remember this big tree. |
|
yes. i remember this big tree. maybe it's the wrong tree. |
|
maybe it's the wrong tree. no, this is the tree. |
|
no, this is the tree. did someone steal it? |
|
did someone steal it? i sure hope not. |
|
i sure hope not. maybe they towed it away. |
|
look at this traffic. i'd rather not. |
|
i'd rather not. it gets worse every year. |
|
it gets worse every year. why are you complaining? we're going almost 20 miles an hour. |
|
why are you complaining? we're going almost 20 miles an hour. the speed limit is 65! |
|
the speed limit is 65! well, that's between 2:00 and 4:00 a.m. |
|
well, that's between 2:00 and 4:00 a.m. where are all these people going? |
|
where are all these people going? they're all asking the same question. |
|
they're all asking the same question. when are they going to fix this problem? |
|
when are they going to fix this problem? they said they need more money. |
|
they said they need more money. they always need more money. |
|
they always need more money. it'll get worse before it gets better. |
|
did you see that car? yes, he went through the red light. |
|
yes, he went through the red light. can we call the police? |
|
can we call the police? no, the police don't care. |
|
no, the police don't care. why not? |
|
why not? they have to see it happen. |
|
they have to see it happen. they don't believe us? |
|
they don't believe us? no. they can only give a ticket if they see it happen. |
|
no. they can only give a ticket if they see it happen. so, what do we do? |
|
so, what do we do? we don't do anything. |
|
we don't do anything. maybe we should honk the horn next time. |
|
maybe we should honk the horn next time. the driver will just honk back at us. |
|
my car is dirty. why don't you wash it? |
|
why don't you wash it? that's what i'm going to do. |
|
that's what i'm going to do. are you going to wash it yourself? |
|
are you going to wash it yourself? of course. it's not a hard job. |
|
of course. it's not a hard job. i'll help you. |
|
i'll help you. okay, i'll get a bucket. |
|
okay, i'll get a bucket. i'll rinse the car first. |
|
i'll rinse the car first. then we can scrub it with a wet sponge and soap. |
|
then we can scrub it with a wet sponge and soap. after that, we can dry it with a towel. |
|
after that, we can dry it with a towel. then it will look like new |
|
then it will look like new and you save $10. |
|
it sure is windy today. paper is flying everywhere. |
|
paper is flying everywhere. this wind is dangerous for drivers. |
|
this wind is dangerous for drivers. especially for drivers of big trucks. |
|
especially for drivers of big trucks. the wind blows those trucks over. |
|
the wind blows those trucks over. it blows trees over, too. |
|
it blows trees over, too. a tree fell onto my dad's car. |
|
a tree fell onto my dad's car. was there much damage? |
|
was there much damage? my dad had to buy a new car. |
|
my dad had to buy a new car. wow! that's terrible. |
|
wow! that's terrible. never park your car under a tree. |
|
never park your car under a tree. the wind will get you, or the birds will get you. |
|
when are we going to stop? we'll stop at the next mcdonald's. |
|
we'll stop at the next mcdonald's. how far away is that? |
|
how far away is that? i think we'll be there in half an hour. |
|
i think we'll be there in half an hour. i hope so. i have to go to the bathroom. |
|
i hope so. i have to go to the bathroom. well, i can always pull over. |
|
well, i can always pull over. no, thank you, i'll just wait. |
|
no, thank you, i'll just wait. we can kill two birds with one stone. |
|
we can kill two birds with one stone. what do you mean? |
|
what do you mean? while you're using the bathroom, i'll order some food. |
|
while you're using the bathroom, i'll order some food. don't order for me. i'm not hungry. |
|
don't order for me. i'm not hungry. i'm very hungry. i'll order for you, and then i'll eat yours. |
|
this is such a long light. look how many cars are waiting in line. |
|
look how many cars are waiting in line. they need a left-turn arrow. |
|
they need a left-turn arrow. only two cars can make a left turn every three or four minutes. |
|
only two cars can make a left turn every three or four minutes. we'll be here forever. |
|
we'll be here forever. get out of this lane. |
|
get out of this lane. but we need to turn left. |
|
but we need to turn left. forget it. go straight. |
|
forget it. go straight. then what? |
|
then what? then we'll just make a u-turn. |
|
then we'll just make a u-turn. and then we can turn right at the light. |
|
and then we can turn right at the light. good idea. it will be so much quicker. |
|
i need a cheap car. how much money do you have? |
|
how much money do you have? $1,000. |
|
$1,000. well, that should get you something. |
|
well, that should get you something. but i need something that's reliable. |
|
but i need something that's reliable. you need a car with low mileage. |
|
you need a car with low mileage. a car that was owned by a little old lady. |
|
a car that was owned by a little old lady. where have you looked? |
|
where have you looked? i haven't looked anywhere yet. |
|
i haven't looked anywhere yet. why not? |
|
why not? because i'll never find one for such a low price. |
|
because i'll never find one for such a low price. you're right about that. keep saving your money. |
|
good afternoon, officer. your driver's license and registration, please. |
|
your driver's license and registration, please. here you go. |
|
here you go. do you know why i pulled you over? |
|
do you know why i pulled you over? i have no idea. all of a sudden i heard your siren. |
|
i have no idea. all of a sudden i heard your siren. you rolled through that stop sign back there. |
|
you rolled through that stop sign back there. but i stopped! |
|
but i stopped! no, you didn't. you slowed down, but you didn't come to a full stop. |
|
no, you didn't. you slowed down, but you didn't come to a full stop. well, nobody else does, so why should i? |
|
well, nobody else does, so why should i? that's not the attitude of a good driver. |
|
that's not the attitude of a good driver. but i am a good driver. i've never had a ticket in my life. |
|
but i am a good driver. i've never had a ticket in my life. well, you've got one now. here. have a nice day. |
|
$140. i can't believe it. what are you talking about? |
|
what are you talking about? i got a ticket downtown for $140. |
|
i got a ticket downtown for $140. were you speeding? |
|
were you speeding? no, i was crossing the street. |
|
no, i was crossing the street. were you jaywalking? |
|
were you jaywalking? no, i was in the crosswalk. |
|
no, i was in the crosswalk. so why did you get a ticket? |
|
so why did you get a ticket? the officer said the red hand was blinking. |
|
the officer said the red hand was blinking. was it blinking when you entered the crosswalk? |
|
was it blinking when you entered the crosswalk? no, the white walk sign was blinking. |
|
no, the white walk sign was blinking. you should fight that ticket. i'll be your witness. |
|
they were in a crosswalk near school at 3 a.m. who? |
|
who? two students from usc. |
|
two students from usc. what happened? |
|
what happened? a speeding car ran a red light, killing the girl. |
|
a speeding car ran a red light, killing the girl. what happened to the other student? |
|
what happened to the other student? he landed on the hood of the car. |
|
he landed on the hood of the car. did he get off the hood? |
|
did he get off the hood? no, the car stopped and the passenger pushed the injured student off the hood. |
|
no, the car stopped and the passenger pushed the injured student off the hood. i'll bet the car continued on its way. |
|
i'll bet the car continued on its way. of course it did. why stop after you've run over two people? |
|
of course it did. why stop after you've run over two people? i hope they find them and put them in jail for life. |
|
what happened to your car? i got a dent in the parking lot. |
|
i got a dent in the parking lot. how did you get it? |
|
how did you get it? i don't know. maybe it was from a shopping cart. |
|
i don't know. maybe it was from a shopping cart. those shopping carts are dangerous. |
|
those shopping carts are dangerous. especially the metal ones. |
|
especially the metal ones. i don't park at a store that uses metal shopping carts. |
|
i don't park at a store that uses metal shopping carts. that's a good idea, but there was a good sale at this store. |
|
that's a good idea, but there was a good sale at this store. did you save any money on the sale? |
|
did you save any money on the sale? yes, i did. i saved about $50. |
|
yes, i did. i saved about $50. that's great. |
|
that's great. yes, except this dent will cost about $150. |
|
did you see "titanic"? yes. it is a great movie. |
|
yes. it is a great movie. i saw it twelve times. |
|
i saw it twelve times. i saw it eight times. |
|
i saw it eight times. i have the dvd. |
|
i have the dvd. so do i. |
|
so do i. let's go to your home. |
|
let's go to your home. we can watch my dvd. |
|
we can watch my dvd. and then we can go to my home. |
|
and then we can go to my home. and watch your dvd. |
|
and watch your dvd. i always cry at the end. |
|
i always cry at the end. me too. it's so sad. |
|
let's play cards. i don't know any card games. |
|
i don't know any card games. i'll teach you one. |
|
i'll teach you one. okay. what will you teach me? |
|
okay. what will you teach me? it's called poker. |
|
it's called poker. is it easy to learn? |
|
is it easy to learn? yes, it will only take about 30 minutes. |
|
yes, it will only take about 30 minutes. okay. teach me how to play. |
|
okay. teach me how to play. we each get five cards. |
|
we each get five cards. oh, look. i have four tens. |
|
oh, look. i have four tens. that's great, but you're not supposed to tell me. |
|
that's great, but you're not supposed to tell me. oh. sorry. okay, i don't have four tens. |
|
i'm a good card player. why is that? |
|
why is that? because i watch the other players. |
|
because i watch the other players. what do you mean? |
|
what do you mean? people will tell you if they have a good hand. |
|
people will tell you if they have a good hand. how do they do that? |
|
how do they do that? for example, a friend of mine licks his lips. |
|
for example, a friend of mine licks his lips. when he licks his lips, you know he has a good hand? |
|
when he licks his lips, you know he has a good hand? i know he has a good hand, so i don't bet. |
|
i know he has a good hand, so i don't bet. he never wins your money? |
|
he never wins your money? nope, and it drives him crazy. |
|
nope, and it drives him crazy. he knows you can't read his mind. maybe he thinks you're cheating. |
|
turn the radio down, please. but i'm listening to it. |
|
but i'm listening to it. well, listen to it more quietly. |
|
well, listen to it more quietly. i can't wait till i grow up. |
|
i can't wait till i grow up. what will you do? |
|
what will you do? i will play the radio as loud as i want. |
|
i will play the radio as loud as i want. that's okay with me. |
|
that's okay with me. i will have a radio in every room of my house. |
|
i will have a radio in every room of my house. remind me to never visit you. |
|
remind me to never visit you. all the radios will be on extra loud. |
|
all the radios will be on extra loud. your neighbors will hate you. |
|
your neighbors will hate you. if they don't like it, they can move. |
|
i hope i win the lotto. your chances are very small. |
|
your chances are very small. but you can't win if you don't play. |
|
but you can't win if you don't play. ha! you can't win if you do play. |
|
ha! you can't win if you do play. someone has to win. |
|
someone has to win. that's what everyone says. |
|
that's what everyone says. it might as well be me. |
|
it might as well be me. that's what everyone says. |
|
that's what everyone says. you're trying to tell me something. |
|
you're trying to tell me something. that didn't take long. |
|
that didn't take long. you think i should quit playing. |
|
you think i should quit playing. save your money for school. |
|
what's on tv? nothing much. |
|
nothing much. what about the baseball game? |
|
what about the baseball game? it got rained out. |
|
it got rained out. rained out? |
|
rained out? yes, rained out. |
|
yes, rained out. how could that be? |
|
how could that be? well, you can't play baseball in a rainstorm. |
|
well, you can't play baseball in a rainstorm. i thought they were playing under a dome. |
|
i thought they were playing under a dome. the dome doesn't close. |
|
the dome doesn't close. why doesn't it close? |
|
why doesn't it close? who knows? they said they'll fix it before next season. |
|
can i try your coffee? sure. here you go. |
|
sure. here you go. hmm, that's not bad. |
|
hmm, that's not bad. there's nothing in it. |
|
there's nothing in it. what do you mean? |
|
what do you mean? i mean, it's just coffee. |
|
i mean, it's just coffee. i figured that. |
|
i figured that. it's not too bitter for you? |
|
it's not too bitter for you? it's a little bitter, but it's okay. |
|
it's a little bitter, but it's okay. there's no sugar or cream in it. |
|
there's no sugar or cream in it. no, it's a taste you have to get used to. |
|
no, it's a taste you have to get used to. sort of like beer. |
|
let's take a walk. what's the weather like? |
|
what's the weather like? let me step outside and see. |
|
let me step outside and see. it's a little chilly, right? |
|
it's a little chilly, right? yes, it is. |
|
yes, it is. i'll put on my cap. |
|
i'll put on my cap. wear a jacket, too. |
|
wear a jacket, too. i wonder if i should bring my gloves. |
|
i wonder if i should bring my gloves. maybe you should, just in case it gets colder. |
|
maybe you should, just in case it gets colder. i'll put a glove in each pocket. |
|
i'll put a glove in each pocket. we'll get warmer as we walk. |
|
we'll get warmer as we walk. yes, but it gets colder as the sun goes down. |
|
look at the car chase on tv! that driver is crazy. |
|
that driver is crazy. i can't believe he hasn't crashed. |
|
i can't believe he hasn't crashed. how fast is he going? |
|
how fast is he going? they say he's going 80 miles per hour. |
|
they say he's going 80 miles per hour. he's going to kill someone. |
|
he's going to kill someone. look! he just hit that car. |
|
look! he just hit that car. oh, my goodness. no one is safe on the streets. |
|
oh, my goodness. no one is safe on the streets. now he's slowing down. |
|
now he's slowing down. maybe he ran out of gas. |
|
maybe he ran out of gas. look! he just got out of the car and started running. |
|
look! he just got out of the car and started running. i hope the police catch him. |
|
tv news is so stupid. they shouldn't even call it news. |
|
they shouldn't even call it news. last night they told us about a cat in a sofa. |
|
last night they told us about a cat in a sofa. yesterday they told us about a dog in a pipe. |
|
yesterday they told us about a dog in a pipe. last week they told us about a bear in a back yard. |
|
last week they told us about a bear in a back yard. last month they told us about a mouse in a restaurant. |
|
last month they told us about a mouse in a restaurant. the weatherman tells us the temperature in every town. |
|
the weatherman tells us the temperature in every town. the sports guy shows us players fighting. |
|
the sports guy shows us players fighting. they always tell us "what's next." |
|
they always tell us "what's next." they always make "what's next" sound exciting, but it never is. |
|
they always make "what's next" sound exciting, but it never is. it's more like news for kids. |
|
it's more like news for kids. they should have kid reporters. |
|
i love my computer. computers are so cool. |
|
computers are so cool. i love to go online. |
|
i love to go online. the internet is amazing. |
|
the internet is amazing. you can travel all over the world. |
|
you can travel all over the world. i know. i went to china yesterday. |
|
i know. i went to china yesterday. what did you do? |
|
what did you do? i stood on the great wall and looked all around. |
|
i stood on the great wall and looked all around. what was it like? |
|
what was it like? it was like the real thing. |
|
it was like the real thing. it was like being there? |
|
it was like being there? yes, i felt like i was actually there. |
|
the beatles are the best. they are the best musical group ever. |
|
they are the best musical group ever. i love all their songs. |
|
i love all their songs. i don't know which one i like the best. |
|
i don't know which one i like the best. i like the ones i can sing along with. |
|
i like the ones i can sing along with. so do i, like "she loves you." |
|
so do i, like "she loves you." "she loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah!..." |
|
"she loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah!..." "
and you know you should be glad!" |
|
"
and you know you should be glad!" what a great song. |
|
what a great song. how about "let it be?" |
|
how about "let it be?" oh, yes! "let it be, let it be
" |
|
oh, yes! "let it be, let it be
" "
there will be an answer, let it be!" |
|
let's go to a movie. i'd rather not. |
|
i'd rather not. why not? |
|
why not? you know i don't like crowds. |
|
you know i don't like crowds. let's go to an early movie. |
|
let's go to an early movie. okay, that won't be very crowded. |
|
okay, that won't be very crowded. what would you like to see? |
|
what would you like to see? oh, i don't care. you're the one who wants to go out. |
|
oh, i don't care. you're the one who wants to go out. well, i want to see "the pursuit of happyness." |
|
well, i want to see "the pursuit of happyness." what have you heard about it? |
|
what have you heard about it? it's based on a true story about a divorced man and his young son. |
|
it's based on a true story about a divorced man and his young son. well, i hope it has a happy ending. |
|
what's your favorite thing to do? i like to watch people. |
|
i like to watch people. that's your favorite thing to do? |
|
that's your favorite thing to do? well, it's one of them. |
|
well, it's one of them. where do you go to watch people? |
|
where do you go to watch people? my girlfriend and i sit outside starbucks. |
|
my girlfriend and i sit outside starbucks. that sounds like a good spot. |
|
that sounds like a good spot. we watch people walk by with their dogs. |
|
we watch people walk by with their dogs. i guess you see lots of different dogs. |
|
i guess you see lots of different dogs. we don't even know what kind most of them are. |
|
we don't even know what kind most of them are. there are lots of different kinds, but they all have one thing in common. |
|
there are lots of different kinds, but they all have one thing in common. yes, they love to sniff each other when they meet. |
|
they call him father dollar bill. yes, he was on the tv news today. |
|
yes, he was on the tv news today. every easter sunday he gives away money. |
|
every easter sunday he gives away money. is it his money? |
|
is it his money? no. movie stars give him money to give to homeless people. |
|
no. movie stars give him money to give to homeless people. how much money does he give away? |
|
how much money does he give away? this year he gave away $15,000. |
|
this year he gave away $15,000. that's a lot of money. |
|
that's a lot of money. he gave $100 to people in wheelchairs. |
|
he gave $100 to people in wheelchairs. what about the other homeless people? |
|
what about the other homeless people? they got $1 each. |
|
they got $1 each. people stood in line just to get one dollar?! |
|
old movies are the best. even though they're in black and white. |
|
even though they're in black and white. a good story is more important than color. |
|
a good story is more important than color. actors didn't curse back then. |
|
actors didn't curse back then. and there was no violence. |
|
and there was no violence. people today don't like that. |
|
people today don't like that. no, today people like lots of action. |
|
no, today people like lots of action. i like a good story. |
|
i like a good story. i like to see actors who are like real people. |
|
i like to see actors who are like real people. like real people with real problems. |
|
like real people with real problems. they still make movies like that. |
|
they still make movies like that. yes, but they never make much money. |
|
do you get pbs on tv? yes, everybody gets the public broadcasting system. |
|
yes, everybody gets the public broadcasting system. it puts me to sleep. |
|
it puts me to sleep. tell me about it. |
|
tell me about it. a gardening show follows a knitting show. |
|
a gardening show follows a knitting show. a cooking show follows a sewing show. |
|
a cooking show follows a sewing show. a travel show follows another travel show. |
|
a travel show follows another travel show. i'll say! i've gone around the world a dozen times already! |
|
i'll say! i've gone around the world a dozen times already! now they're adding old tv shows to the old movies. |
|
now they're adding old tv shows to the old movies. i sure would like to see something interesting for a change. |
|
i sure would like to see something interesting for a change. if more people donate money, pbs could offer new shows. |
|
if more people donate money, pbs could offer new shows. who wants to donate? public tv should be free. |
|
i love to watch "judge judy." is that a tv show? |
|
is that a tv show? yes. it's on every afternoon. |
|
yes. it's on every afternoon. what's so good about it? |
|
what's so good about it? they have interesting lawsuits. |
|
they have interesting lawsuits. such as? |
|
such as? yesterday, a woman complained about a cell phone she bought on ebay. |
|
yesterday, a woman complained about a cell phone she bought on ebay. was something wrong with the phone? |
|
was something wrong with the phone? it works only in canada. |
|
it works only in canada. did the seller know that? |
|
did the seller know that? yes, and he didn't tell the buyer. |
|
yes, and he didn't tell the buyer. i hope judge judy made the seller take the phone back. |
|
that woman is a very good singer. yes, but she looks like a man. |
|
yes, but she looks like a man. what difference does it make? |
|
what difference does it make? female singers are supposed to be pretty. |
|
female singers are supposed to be pretty. singers are supposed to sound good. |
|
singers are supposed to sound good. they should look good, too. |
|
they should look good, too. there are lots of ugly men singers. |
|
there are lots of ugly men singers. men singers don't have to look good. |
|
men singers don't have to look good. then neither do women singers. |
|
then neither do women singers. well, i would never buy her cd. |
|
well, i would never buy her cd. but you would buy her cd if she was pretty? |
|
but you would buy her cd if she was pretty? yes. i would buy all of her cds. |
|
all the tv stations are going to go digital. yes, that will occur next month. |
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yes, that will occur next month. most of them are already broadcasting in digital. |
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most of them are already broadcasting in digital. the digital signal is very clear. |
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the digital signal is very clear. oh, no, it isn't! |
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oh, no, it isn't! what do you mean? |
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what do you mean? i can't get a single channel. |
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i can't get a single channel. do you have a digital tv? |
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do you have a digital tv? of course. but i don't have cable. |
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of course. but i don't have cable. you don't need to have cable, but you do need a good antenna. |
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you don't need to have cable, but you do need a good antenna. but i have rabbit ears. |
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but i have rabbit ears. rabbit ears aren't strong enough. buy a digital antenna. |
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i've got a date for you. oh, really? |
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oh, really? are you interested? |
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are you interested? maybe. what is she like? |
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maybe. what is she like? she's got a great personality. |
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she's got a great personality. uh-oh. that means that she's fat and ugly. |
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uh-oh. that means that she's fat and ugly. she's cute. |
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she's cute. okay, so she's not ugly; she's just fat. |
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okay, so she's not ugly; she's just fat. she weighs 98 pounds. |
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she weighs 98 pounds. okay, she's not fat. so what's the problem with her? |
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okay, she's not fat. so what's the problem with her? who said there is a problem with her? |
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who said there is a problem with her? the problem is she has no problemsshe's too good for me! |
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i think you're very pretty. thank you. |
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thank you. would you have dinner with me? |
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would you have dinner with me? i would like to. |
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i would like to. can i pick you up friday night? |
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can i pick you up friday night? what time? |
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what time? eight o'clock. |
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eight o'clock. that sounds great. |
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that sounds great. we'll go to a french restaurant. |
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we'll go to a french restaurant. i've never been to a french restaurant. |
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i've never been to a french restaurant. i think you'll love the food. |
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i think you'll love the food. i'm not going to eat any snails! |
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you have pretty eyes. thank you. so do you. |
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thank you. so do you. i wish my eyes were blue. |
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i wish my eyes were blue. what's the matter with green eyes? |
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what's the matter with green eyes? nothing, except my favorite color is blue. |
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nothing, except my favorite color is blue. maybe in your next life you'll have blue eyes. |
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maybe in your next life you'll have blue eyes. but what if i'm a fish in my next life? |
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but what if i'm a fish in my next life? i think some fish have blue eyes. |
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i think some fish have blue eyes. i hope i don't come back as a fish. |
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i hope i don't come back as a fish. i hope i come back as a cat. |
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i hope i come back as a cat. cats have beautiful eyes. |
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cats have beautiful eyes. i would love to have blue cat-eyes. |
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i love you. i love you, too. |
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i love you, too. i loved you the first day i saw you. |
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i loved you the first day i saw you. it was love at first sight? |
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it was love at first sight? yes, it was love at first sight. |
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yes, it was love at first sight. i didn't love you at first. |
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i didn't love you at first. i know. i had to chase you for a while. |
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i know. i had to chase you for a while. yes, you chased me and then you caught me. |
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yes, you chased me and then you caught me. now you're mine forever. |
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now you're mine forever. and you're mine forever. |
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and you're mine forever. we'll grow old together. |
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we'll grow old together. and be happy together. |
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i'm in love with that girl. have you told her? |
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have you told her? of course not. |
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of course not. why not? |
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why not? she would laugh at me. |
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she would laugh at me. how do you know? |
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how do you know? because they always do. |
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because they always do. maybe she's different. |
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maybe she's different. they're all the same. |
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they're all the same. just ask her out to dinner. |
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just ask her out to dinner. and then what? |
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and then what? and then she'll know that you like her. |
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give me a hug. i'm not in the mood. |
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i'm not in the mood. what's the matter? |
|
what's the matter? i saw you looking at that woman. |
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i saw you looking at that woman. what woman? |
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what woman? you know, that woman with the big boobs. |
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you know, that woman with the big boobs. i was not looking at her. |
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i was not looking at her. you were, too. |
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you were, too. i'm not interested in her. |
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i'm not interested in her. then why were you looking at her? |
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then why were you looking at her? i was looking at something else. |
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i was looking at something else. oh, really? then spend tonight looking at the sofa. |
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would you like to go on a blind date? you must be joking. |
|
you must be joking. no, i'm serious. |
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no, i'm serious. i don't want to date a blind woman. |
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i don't want to date a blind woman. a blind date doesn't mean that she is blind! |
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a blind date doesn't mean that she is blind! what does it mean? |
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what does it mean? a blind date is a date with someone you don't know. |
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a blind date is a date with someone you don't know. why would i date someone i don't even know? |
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why would i date someone i don't even know? to try something new and exciting. |
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to try something new and exciting. what if i don't like her? |
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what if i don't like her? then you don't date her again. |
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i have a date tomorrow night. really? who with? |
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really? who with? a girl i met at the market. |
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a girl i met at the market. you met a girl at the supermarket? |
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you met a girl at the supermarket? she was standing behind me in a really slow line at the checkout counter. |
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she was standing behind me in a really slow line at the checkout counter. what did you say to her? |
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what did you say to her? i had two pineapples in my cart, and she asked where i had found them. |
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i had two pineapples in my cart, and she asked where i had found them. she asked you about your pineapples? |
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she asked you about your pineapples? i told her i had gotten the last two on the shelf, but i offered her one of mine. |
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i told her i had gotten the last two on the shelf, but i offered her one of mine. that was nice of you. |
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that was nice of you. she asked me how she could return the favor, so i asked her out. |
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she asked me how she could return the favor, so i asked her out. sometimes a slow line can be a good thing. |
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did you have a date friday night? yes, in fact, i did. |
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yes, in fact, i did. who did you go out with? |
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who did you go out with? a man i met in a coffee shop. |
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a man i met in a coffee shop. where did you go? |
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where did you go? we went to a nice restaurant. |
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we went to a nice restaurant. anywhere else? |
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anywhere else? then we went to a jazz club. |
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then we went to a jazz club. that sounds like a nice date. |
|
that sounds like a nice date. yes, it was pleasant. |
|
yes, it was pleasant. but you won't date him again? |
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but you won't date him again? no. he was nice, but there was no chemistry. |
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i had the worst date the other night. what happened? |
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what happened? first of all, he was half an hour late. |
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first of all, he was half an hour late. that's not a good start. |
|
that's not a good start. then he didn't bother to apologize. |
|
then he didn't bother to apologize. that's rude. |
|
that's rude. then he drove too fast to the restaurant. |
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then he drove too fast to the restaurant. that's dangerous. |
|
that's dangerous. i thought about getting out and taking a taxi home. |
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i thought about getting out and taking a taxi home. what happened at the restaurant? |
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what happened at the restaurant? we had a $40 meal, and he left a $1 tip! |
|
we had a $40 meal, and he left a $1 tip! i guess you can't go back to that restaurant. |
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i don't like that man. why not? |
|
why not? he's a dirty old man. |
|
he's a dirty old man. what do you mean? |
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what do you mean? he's old enough to be my father, yet he asked me out. |
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he's old enough to be my father, yet he asked me out. well, you can't blame a man for asking. |
|
well, you can't blame a man for asking. he should act his age. |
|
he should act his age. but a lot of old people are still interested in dating. |
|
but a lot of old people are still interested in dating. they should find a nice hobby. |
|
they should find a nice hobby. just wait until you're 50 years old. |
|
just wait until you're 50 years old. dating will be the furthest thing from my mind. |
|
dating will be the furthest thing from my mind. that's what you say now. wait till you're 50. |
|
does your girlfriend ever make you angry? sometimes. |
|
sometimes. what does she do? |
|
what does she do? just yesterday, i told her i wouldn't trade her for all the money in the world. |
|
just yesterday, i told her i wouldn't trade her for all the money in the world. that was a nice thing to say. |
|
that was a nice thing to say. that's what i thought. |
|
that's what i thought. what did she say? |
|
what did she say? she laughed! she didn't believe me. |
|
she laughed! she didn't believe me. that wasn't very nice of her. |
|
that wasn't very nice of her. she said that nothing is more important to me than money. |
|
she said that nothing is more important to me than money. what did you say? |
|
what did you say? i told her i wouldn't trade her for any other woman in the world. |
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some people have good noses. i wish i had a good nose. mine is way too big. |
|
i wish i had a good nose. mine is way too big. i don't mean good-looking. i mean good-smelling. |
|
i don't mean good-looking. i mean good-smelling. oh. but that can be a curse. |
|
oh. but that can be a curse. yes, because you can be too sensitive to odors. |
|
yes, because you can be too sensitive to odors. i'll say. my girlfriend has a nose like a drug dog. |
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i'll say. my girlfriend has a nose like a drug dog. did she catch you using drugs? |
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did she catch you using drugs? sort of. she knows whenever i sneak a cigarette. |
|
sort of. she knows whenever i sneak a cigarette. you don't need a good nose for thatcigarettes stink. |
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you don't need a good nose for thatcigarettes stink. but when i sneak just one cigarette in the morning, she can smell it that evening! |
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but when i sneak just one cigarette in the morning, she can smell it that evening! boy, that is a good nose. |
|
boy, that is a good nose. i told her she should apply for a job at customs. |
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let's go out to eat. that sounds like fun. |
|
that sounds like fun. where do you want to go? |
|
where do you want to go? let me think a minute. |
|
let me think a minute. i feel like chinese. |
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i feel like chinese. that sounds delicious. |
|
that sounds delicious. i know a good chinese restaurant. |
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i know a good chinese restaurant. how far away is it? |
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how far away is it? it's only 10 minutes from here. |
|
it's only 10 minutes from here. do we need reservations? |
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do we need reservations? oh, no. we can walk right in. |
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oh, no. we can walk right in. let's go now. i'm hungry! |
|
i can't believe how long this line is. this is a popular restaurant, isn't it? |
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this is a popular restaurant, isn't it? yes, but it isn't a fast-food restaurant, is it? |
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yes, but it isn't a fast-food restaurant, is it? it's the slowest hamburger in town. |
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it's the slowest hamburger in town. that's because they cook it while you wait. |
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that's because they cook it while you wait. yes. that's why it's also the best hamburger in town. |
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yes. that's why it's also the best hamburger in town. a great burger and great service. |
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a great burger and great service. yes, the workers are very polite. |
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yes, the workers are very polite. and they're clean. |
|
and they're clean. i've been coming here for years. |
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i've been coming here for years. me too. |
|
me too. excuse me. they just called my number. |
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lunch was delicious. thank you. |
|
thank you. what kind of soup was that? |
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what kind of soup was that? it was tomato soup. |
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it was tomato soup. that tasted so good. |
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that tasted so good. i put lemon and butter in it. |
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i put lemon and butter in it. the sandwich was good, too. |
|
the sandwich was good, too. everyone likes bacon and tomato sandwiches. |
|
everyone likes bacon and tomato sandwiches. especially on toast. |
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especially on toast. and the pickles were great, too. |
|
and the pickles were great, too. tomorrow we'll have rice and fish for lunch. |
|
tomorrow we'll have rice and fish for lunch. i can't wait. |
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i'm calling the waiter. what's the matter? |
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what's the matter? this steak has too much fat. |
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this steak has too much fat. what do you want the waiter to do? |
|
what do you want the waiter to do? bring me a better steak. |
|
bring me a better steak. i wouldn't do that. |
|
i wouldn't do that. why not? |
|
why not? they will drop the new steak on the floor, step on it, and then spit on it. |
|
they will drop the new steak on the floor, step on it, and then spit on it. you're crazy. |
|
you're crazy. then the waiter will give you a big smile as he brings you the new steak. |
|
then the waiter will give you a big smile as he brings you the new steak. where do you get these crazy ideas? |
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where do you get these crazy ideas? i used to cook in a restaurant! |
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let's leave. but we just got here. |
|
but we just got here. did you see the waiter's hands? |
|
did you see the waiter's hands? no. |
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no. he had dirty fingernails. |
|
he had dirty fingernails. really? |
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really? his nails were black! |
|
his nails were black! that's disgusting. |
|
that's disgusting. and he poured water into our glasses. |
|
and he poured water into our glasses. yuck! no water for me. |
|
yuck! no water for me. i wonder if the cooks' nails are dirty, too. |
|
i wonder if the cooks' nails are dirty, too. who cares? let's get out of here. |
|
this hot bread is delicious. i like this restaurant because they give you free bread. |
|
i like this restaurant because they give you free bread. well, i think we are paying for it. |
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well, i think we are paying for it. no. look at the bill when we get it. there's no charge for the bread. |
|
no. look at the bill when we get it. there's no charge for the bread. it is delicious, especially with butter. |
|
it is delicious, especially with butter. i think we should just leave after we fill up on the bread. |
|
i think we should just leave after we fill up on the bread. they probably wouldn't like that. |
|
they probably wouldn't like that. i'm eating so much bread that i'm getting full. |
|
i'm eating so much bread that i'm getting full. then stop eating the bread! |
|
then stop eating the bread! okay, just one more piece. pass the butter, please. |
|
okay, just one more piece. pass the butter, please. if i owned a restaurant, i would never serve hot bread before the main course. |
|
if i owned a restaurant, i would never serve hot bread before the main course. that's terrible. i would never go to your restaurant. |
|
is this a clean restaurant? well, the tables and chairs look okay. |
|
well, the tables and chairs look okay. okay, let's sit down. |
|
okay, let's sit down. check out the silverware. |
|
check out the silverware. it passes inspection. |
|
it passes inspection. here comes the waiter. see if his hands and nails are clean. |
|
here comes the waiter. see if his hands and nails are clean. well, the waiter looked clean, so i guess it's okay to eat here. |
|
well, the waiter looked clean, so i guess it's okay to eat here. you're forgetting about the bathroom. |
|
you're forgetting about the bathroom. i'm going to just hope that the bathroom is clean. |
|
i'm going to just hope that the bathroom is clean. you're not going to examine it before we order dinner? |
|
you're not going to examine it before we order dinner? no, i'd rather not find out that it's dirty, because i'm pretty hungry right now. |
|
no, i'd rather not find out that it's dirty, because i'm pretty hungry right now. me, too. let's forget about germs and focus on food. |
|
have you seen our waiter? here he comes now. |
|
here he comes now. we've been sitting here for almost 10 minutes. |
|
we've been sitting here for almost 10 minutes. oops, i guess i was wrong. that isn't our waiter. |
|
oops, i guess i was wrong. that isn't our waiter. we can give him five more minutes, and then leave. |
|
we can give him five more minutes, and then leave. i'll go up front and talk to the manager. |
|
i'll go up front and talk to the manager. that's a good idea. |
|
that's a good idea. maybe they'll give us free drinks for waiting so long. |
|
maybe they'll give us free drinks for waiting so long. maybe he'll send us our waiter immediately. |
|
maybe he'll send us our waiter immediately. every time we eat out, it's an adventure. |
|
every time we eat out, it's an adventure. last time, we got seats next to the kitchen. |
|
last time, we got seats next to the kitchen. we'll never go there again. |
|
is this table okay? no, it's too close to the kitchen door. |
|
no, it's too close to the kitchen door. how about this table? |
|
how about this table? no, it's too close to the front door. |
|
no, it's too close to the front door. this looks like a nice table. |
|
this looks like a nice table. no, it's too close to the salad bar. |
|
no, it's too close to the salad bar. okay, i give up. |
|
okay, i give up. well, there is one good table. |
|
well, there is one good table. great. which one? |
|
great. which one? that one. a group of eight just sat down at it. |
|
i don't believe the art world. what is it this time? |
|
what is it this time? an andy warhol drawing. |
|
an andy warhol drawing. he's a famous artist. |
|
he's a famous artist. he drew two butterflies and a flower on a napkin in a restaurant. |
|
he drew two butterflies and a flower on a napkin in a restaurant. did he sign it? |
|
did he sign it? yes. |
|
yes. is it beautiful? |
|
is it beautiful? it's just black ink on a white napkin. and the napkin has food stains! |
|
it's just black ink on a white napkin. and the napkin has food stains! so it's not worth much? |
|
so it's not worth much? only about $30,000. |
|
only about $30,000. without the food stains, it would probably be worth more. |
|
can we go to the baseball game? of course. |
|
of course. i love baseball. |
|
i love baseball. so do i. |
|
so do i. i love to eat the peanuts. |
|
i love to eat the peanuts. i love to eat the hot dogs. |
|
i love to eat the hot dogs. i hope we'll see a home run. |
|
i hope we'll see a home run. i hope we'll catch a foul ball. |
|
i hope we'll catch a foul ball. bring a jacket. |
|
bring a jacket. yes. it gets a little cool at night. |
|
yes. it gets a little cool at night. bring a glove to catch a foul ball. |
|
bring a glove to catch a foul ball. no. i'll just use my cap to catch a foul ball. |
|
golf is a silly game. it certainly is. |
|
it certainly is. you hit a white ball. |
|
you hit a white ball. and then you chase it. |
|
and then you chase it. and then you hit it again. |
|
and then you hit it again. finally, you put the ball into a hole in the ground. |
|
finally, you put the ball into a hole in the ground. you do this 18 times, because there are 18 holes. |
|
you do this 18 times, because there are 18 holes. what's the point? |
|
what's the point? how can it be fun? |
|
how can it be fun? they pay money to play this silly game! |
|
they pay money to play this silly game! i think golfers have a mental problem. |
|
i think golfers have a mental problem. i think they're nuts. |
|
do you want to go fishing? yes. that's a good idea. |
|
yes. that's a good idea. where do you want to go? |
|
where do you want to go? we can go to the river. |
|
we can go to the river. or we can go to the lake. |
|
or we can go to the lake. or we can go to the ocean. |
|
or we can go to the ocean. let's go to the lake. |
|
let's go to the lake. yes. the lake is only 10 miles away. |
|
yes. the lake is only 10 miles away. we can be there in 20 minutes. |
|
we can be there in 20 minutes. i'll get our fishing rods. |
|
i'll get our fishing rods. i'll get the bait. |
|
i'll get the bait. we'll have fresh fish for dinner! |
|
baseball is fun. i like to hit the ball. |
|
i like to hit the ball. i like to run around the bases. |
|
i like to run around the bases. i like to slide into the bases. |
|
i like to slide into the bases. yeah. it's a lot of fun to slide. |
|
yeah. it's a lot of fun to slide. i want to be a baseball player when i grow up. |
|
i want to be a baseball player when i grow up. me too. i want to play for the yankees. |
|
me too. i want to play for the yankees. not me. i want to play for the dodgers. |
|
not me. i want to play for the dodgers. we have to practice every day. |
|
we have to practice every day. i don't like practice. |
|
i don't like practice. me neither. it's boring. |
|
me neither. it's boring. but practice makes perfect. |
|
let's go jogging. that's a good idea. |
|
that's a good idea. i bought some new shoes. |
|
i bought some new shoes. are they comfortable? |
|
are they comfortable? they're very comfortable. |
|
they're very comfortable. how much were they? |
|
how much were they? they were on sale for $80. |
|
they were on sale for $80. do they help you run faster? |
|
do they help you run faster? no, but my feet don't hurt anymore. |
|
no, but my feet don't hurt anymore. then they're worth every penny. |
|
then they're worth every penny. you might want to buy a pair. |
|
you might want to buy a pair. i'll wait until i wear this pair out. |
|
tiger is the greatest golfer in the world. you can say that again. |
|
you can say that again. but i'm worried about tiger. |
|
but i'm worried about tiger. why is that? |
|
why is that? because he likes to scuba dive. |
|
because he likes to scuba dive. what's wrong with that? |
|
what's wrong with that? it can be dangerous. |
|
it can be dangerous. you mean he could drown. |
|
you mean he could drown. he shouldn't scuba dive until he retires. |
|
he shouldn't scuba dive until he retires. but he dives to relax. |
|
but he dives to relax. he might relax, but it makes me nervous. |
|
he might relax, but it makes me nervous. if his wife doesn't mind, you shouldn't mind. |
|
did you watch that golf tournament? the one that tiger won? |
|
the one that tiger won? how did he do it? |
|
how did he do it? it was nothing for him. |
|
it was nothing for him. he sank a 20-foot putt on the last hole to win by one stroke! |
|
he sank a 20-foot putt on the last hole to win by one stroke! he sank a 25-footer last year at the same tournament to win by one stroke. |
|
he sank a 25-footer last year at the same tournament to win by one stroke. i think he is from outer space. |
|
i think he is from outer space. no human could possibly play golf that well. |
|
no human could possibly play golf that well. whenever he needs a shot to win a tournament, he makes that shot. |
|
whenever he needs a shot to win a tournament, he makes that shot. no human can do that. |
|
no human can do that. somebody should check his birth record. |
|
somebody should check his birth record. i bet it says he was born on mars. |
|
who's the greatest baseball player? there are so many great players. |
|
there are so many great players. yes, but who is the greatest? |
|
yes, but who is the greatest? i'd have to say babe ruth. |
|
i'd have to say babe ruth. most people would say that. |
|
most people would say that. he changed the game. |
|
he changed the game. yes, he made the home run popular. |
|
yes, he made the home run popular. everybody loved him, all over the nation. |
|
everybody loved him, all over the nation. he helped make the yankees the best team ever. |
|
he helped make the yankees the best team ever. and ruth was a good person, too. |
|
and ruth was a good person, too. he always visited hospitals to cheer up sick kids. |
|
he always visited hospitals to cheer up sick kids. there will never be another babe. |
|
did you hear what happened at the baseball game? no, please tell me. |
|
no, please tell me. someone punched out someone. |
|
someone punched out someone. that's not nice. |
|
that's not nice. it's worse than that. |
|
it's worse than that. how so? |
|
how so? two guys got into an argument. |
|
two guys got into an argument. i'll bet they were drinking. |
|
i'll bet they were drinking. a third guy punched one of the two guys. |
|
a third guy punched one of the two guys. i'll bet he was drinking, too. |
|
i'll bet he was drinking, too. the victim hit his head on the concrete steps and died. |
|
the victim hit his head on the concrete steps and died. that's terrible. can't people just have fun at a baseball game? |
|
i want to go to the ball game. is there a game tonight? |
|
is there a game tonight? yes, it starts at 7 p.m. |
|
yes, it starts at 7 p.m. can we get tickets? |
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can we get tickets? yes, but only the cheap tickets. |
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yes, but only the cheap tickets. how much are they? |
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how much are they? they're only $5 each. |
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they're only $5 each. that's a good price. |
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that's a good price. yes, it's cheaper than a hot dog or a beer. |
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yes, it's cheaper than a hot dog or a beer. where are the seats? |
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where are the seats? they're behind the outfield. |
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they're behind the outfield. maybe we can catch a home run ball. |
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golf is so hard. what's so hard about hitting a little white ball? |
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what's so hard about hitting a little white ball? it's hard if you want to do it right. |
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it's hard if you want to do it right. you mean like tiger? |
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you mean like tiger? no, like a good amateur golfer. |
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no, like a good amateur golfer. what's so hard about golf? |
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what's so hard about golf? there are so many things you have to do right. |
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there are so many things you have to do right. like what? |
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like what? like keep your left arm straight, keep your head down, and follow through. |
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like keep your left arm straight, keep your head down, and follow through. yikes! who can remember all that? |
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yikes! who can remember all that? you need to get a lot of lessons when you're really young. |
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you need to get a lot of lessons when you're really young. forget it. golf sounds more like work than fun. |
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did you hear about the ball player? the home run hitter on drugs? |
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the home run hitter on drugs? he said a doctor helped him with a personal problem. |
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he said a doctor helped him with a personal problem. he said he wasn't using drugs. |
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he said he wasn't using drugs. he apologized to the fans. |
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he apologized to the fans. the league suspended him for 50 games. |
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the league suspended him for 50 games. that will cost him some money. |
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that will cost him some money. yes, about $7 million. |
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yes, about $7 million. that will teach him a good lesson. |
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that will teach him a good lesson. he probably won't use drugs anymore. |
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he probably won't use drugs anymore. but it won't stop other players from using drugs. |
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but it won't stop other players from using drugs. no. everyone always figures that they won't get caught. |
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why is there so much crime? because parents don't teach their kids right from wrong. |
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because parents don't teach their kids right from wrong. is that it? |
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is that it? also, there aren't enough police. |
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also, there aren't enough police. but there are a lot of police. |
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but there are a lot of police. there's only one police officer per 100 criminals. |
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there's only one police officer per 100 criminals. can't we hire more police? |
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can't we hire more police? no. it costs too much money. |
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no. it costs too much money. doesn't crime cost more than police? |
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doesn't crime cost more than police? yes, it does. |
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yes, it does. so it would be cheaper to hire more police? |
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so it would be cheaper to hire more police? yes, it would. |
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this is a great neighborhood. yes, it is. |
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yes, it is. people are friendly. |
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people are friendly. yes, they are. |
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yes, they are. the streets and sidewalks are clean. |
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the streets and sidewalks are clean. yes, they are. |
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yes, they are. there's a real nice park nearby. |
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there's a real nice park nearby. yes, there is. |
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yes, there is. i feel safe here. |
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i feel safe here. there is no crime here. |
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there is no crime here. i wish i could move here. |
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i wish i could move here. maybe you can, if someone moves out. |
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the house burned down. what happened? |
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what happened? the man fell asleep. |
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the man fell asleep. was he smoking? |
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was he smoking? yes, he was smoking a cigarette. |
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yes, he was smoking a cigarette. did he die? |
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did he die? yes, he did. his cat died, too. |
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yes, he did. his cat died, too. that's too bad. what about his smoke alarm? |
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that's too bad. what about his smoke alarm? the battery was dead. |
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the battery was dead. a good battery would have saved his life. |
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a good battery would have saved his life. he had cigarettes, but no battery. |
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he had cigarettes, but no battery. it happens all the time. |
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they say he has started fifteen big fires. he's been in jail three times already. |
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he's been in jail three times already. why did they ever let him out? |
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why did they ever let him out? it's the law. they can't keep him in jail forever. |
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it's the law. they can't keep him in jail forever. why not? everyone knows he's a firebug. he loves to start fires. |
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why not? everyone knows he's a firebug. he loves to start fires. i don't know. sometimes the law doesn't make sense. |
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i don't know. sometimes the law doesn't make sense. but his latest fire killed someone. |
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but his latest fire killed someone. this time they have charged him with murder. |
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this time they have charged him with murder. so maybe he'll go to jail forever? |
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so maybe he'll go to jail forever? i sure hope so. |
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i sure hope so. someone should set him on fire. |
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someone should set him on fire. that would teach him a good lesson. |
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put your seatbelt on. why? |
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why? because it will protect you in case of an accident. |
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because it will protect you in case of an accident. but it's uncomfortable. |
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but it's uncomfortable. it's the law. |
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it's the law. it's so much trouble. |
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it's so much trouble. it's common sense. |
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it's common sense. it's so tight that it's hard for me to breathe. |
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it's so tight that it's hard for me to breathe. hold your breath till we get there. |
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hold your breath till we get there. okay, my seatbelt is on. |
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okay, my seatbelt is on. i'm glad you don't complain very much. |
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i'm glad you don't complain very much. i'm ready for an accident. |
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what are you doing? i'm going to change the light bulb. it burnt out. |
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i'm going to change the light bulb. it burnt out. what are you standing on? |
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what are you standing on? a couple of dictionaries and some textbooks. |
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a couple of dictionaries and some textbooks. are you crazy? |
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are you crazy? what's the matter? |
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what's the matter? those books will slip and you'll fall. |
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those books will slip and you'll fall. it's only a couple of feet. |
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it's only a couple of feet. what if you fall while you're holding the light bulb, and it breaks and pieces go into your eyes? |
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what if you fall while you're holding the light bulb, and it breaks and pieces go into your eyes? i never thought about that. |
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i never thought about that. you'd be blind for the rest of your life! |
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you'd be blind for the rest of your life! i'll get the stepladder. |
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did you see that puddle of water on the floor? yes. i called for a clean-up. |
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yes. i called for a clean-up. a puddle of water is very dangerous. |
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a puddle of water is very dangerous. it isn't easy to see. |
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it isn't easy to see. but it's real easy to slip on. |
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but it's real easy to slip on. especially on these slick floors. |
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especially on these slick floors. someone who slips could hurt their back. |
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someone who slips could hurt their back. they could even crack their head open. |
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they could even crack their head open. we should stand here till the clean-up person gets here. |
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we should stand here till the clean-up person gets here. we can leave if we put an orange cone here. |
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we can leave if we put an orange cone here. yes, but i don't know where the orange cones are. |
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yes, but i don't know where the orange cones are. it doesn't matter. here he comes now with the mop. |
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what happens when the fire alarm rings? we tell our students to leave the classroom. |
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we tell our students to leave the classroom. can they take their belongings? |
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can they take their belongings? yes, if they do it quickly. |
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yes, if they do it quickly. where do the students go? |
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where do the students go? they go out to the north parking lot. |
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they go out to the north parking lot. what do the teachers do? |
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what do the teachers do? we take our rosters to the parking lot and take roll. |
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we take our rosters to the parking lot and take roll. why do you do that? |
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why do you do that? we want to make sure all the students are out of the building. |
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we want to make sure all the students are out of the building. if they are all outside, then what? |
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if they are all outside, then what? then we just wait outside for a fireman to tell us to go back in. |
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i have to go back upstairs. why? we're already late. |
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why? we're already late. i have to check the stove. |
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i have to check the stove. what's the matter? |
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what's the matter? maybe i left the burner on. |
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maybe i left the burner on. no, you didn't. i checked the stove before we left. |
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no, you didn't. i checked the stove before we left. are you sure? |
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are you sure? of course i'm sure. |
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of course i'm sure. well, i have to go back upstairs anyway. |
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well, i have to go back upstairs anyway. it's getting later every minute. |
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it's getting later every minute. i think i left the water running. |
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i think i left the water running. no, you didn't. let's go! the only thing running is the clock! |
|
the city is buying guns. what are they paying? |
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what are they paying? up to $200 for each gun, no questions asked. |
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up to $200 for each gun, no questions asked. why are they doing this? |
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why are they doing this? they want to get guns off the street. |
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they want to get guns off the street. who would turn in a gun for $200? |
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who would turn in a gun for $200? that isn't a good deal? |
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that isn't a good deal? a good gun costs $400 or more. |
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a good gun costs $400 or more. well, if you bring your receipt, maybe they'll give you $400. |
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well, if you bring your receipt, maybe they'll give you $400. i'll keep my receipt and my gun. |
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i'll keep my receipt and my gun. i didn't know you had a gun. |
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i didn't know you had a gun. everyone in america should have a gun. |
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you're yawning. i sure am. |
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i sure am. you should go to bed. |
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you should go to bed. i will as soon as i finish this article. |
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i will as soon as i finish this article. what are you reading? |
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what are you reading? it's about crime in los angeles. |
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it's about crime in los angeles. what does it say? |
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what does it say? the mayor says the crime rate is going down. |
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the mayor says the crime rate is going down. then why does everyone lock their doors? |
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then why does everyone lock their doors? i guess they haven't read this article. |
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i guess they haven't read this article. no one believes that the crime rate is going down. |
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no one believes that the crime rate is going down. maybe the mayor is just talking about his own neighborhood. |
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people who live in california are crazy. why is that? |
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why is that? because of all the earthquakes and fires. |
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because of all the earthquakes and fires. but big earthquakes happen only once in a while. |
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but big earthquakes happen only once in a while. once in a while is once too many. |
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once in a while is once too many. but you're right. there are a lot of fires. |
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but you're right. there are a lot of fires. a recent fire destroyed 85 homes. |
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a recent fire destroyed 85 homes. still, it's safer than florida. |
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still, it's safer than florida. florida doesn't have earthquakes or fires. |
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florida doesn't have earthquakes or fires. no, florida just has hurricanes every year from june to october. |
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no, florida just has hurricanes every year from june to october. but most of those hurricanes are harmless. |
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but most of those hurricanes are harmless. excuse me. hurricane andrew destroyed 30,000 homes! |
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i went to hawaii on vacation. did you like it? |
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did you like it? i loved it. i want to live there. |
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i loved it. i want to live there. what did you like? |
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what did you like? the island is so green, and the water is so blue. |
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the island is so green, and the water is so blue. did you go swimming? |
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did you go swimming? i went to the beach every day. |
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i went to the beach every day. how was the weather? |
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how was the weather? it was hot and sunny every day. |
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it was hot and sunny every day. what did you do at night? |
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what did you do at night? at night i went out to eat. the food was delicious. |
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at night i went out to eat. the food was delicious. people who live in hawaii are lucky. |
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i like this hotel. what do you like about it? |
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what do you like about it? we get a free breakfast. |
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we get a free breakfast. coffee and a roll? |
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coffee and a roll? no, a real breakfast. |
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no, a real breakfast. bacon and eggs? |
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bacon and eggs? with toast, ham, sausage, fresh fruit, and juice. |
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with toast, ham, sausage, fresh fruit, and juice. wow! that is nice. let's stay for two nights. |
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wow! that is nice. let's stay for two nights. and the rooms are clean, too. |
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and the rooms are clean, too. do they allow pets? |
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do they allow pets? no pets, no smoking. |
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no pets, no smoking. i like that. let's stay three nights. |
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i'm not sleeping here tonight. what's the matter? this is a nice room. |
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what's the matter? this is a nice room. maybe the room is nice, but not the bed. |
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maybe the room is nice, but not the bed. what's wrong with the bed? |
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what's wrong with the bed? look at this sheet. |
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look at this sheet. yes? |
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yes? see those stains? |
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see those stains? i sure do. |
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i sure do. i'm not sleeping on that sheet. |
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i'm not sleeping on that sheet. well, just call the front desk. they'll give us new sheets. |
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well, just call the front desk. they'll give us new sheets. i want sheets without stains on them. |
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i want sheets without stains on them. from now on, let's bring our own sheets. |
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what time does your plane leave? it leaves at 12:15. |
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it leaves at 12:15. when do you have to be at the airport? |
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when do you have to be at the airport? i have to be there two hours early. |
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i have to be there two hours early. so we have to be at the airport at 10:15. |
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so we have to be at the airport at 10:15. that means we have to leave the house at 9:15. |
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that means we have to leave the house at 9:15. well, it's an hour to get there, if there are no traffic problems. |
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well, it's an hour to get there, if there are no traffic problems. so maybe we better leave at 8:15? |
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so maybe we better leave at 8:15? yes, it's better to get there too early than too late. |
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yes, it's better to get there too early than too late. i agree. |
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i agree. you never know what might happen on these freeways. |
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you never know what might happen on these freeways. there's at least one huge accident every day. |
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i need to fly to new york. when are you going? |
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when are you going? during the christmas holidays. |
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during the christmas holidays. you'd better buy your ticket now. |
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you'd better buy your ticket now. you must be kidding. |
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you must be kidding. no, i'm not. it's march. time is running out. seats are selling out right now. |
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no, i'm not. it's march. time is running out. seats are selling out right now. i thought i would wait until october. |
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i thought i would wait until october. i'll bet this is the first time you've ever flown during christmas. |
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i'll bet this is the first time you've ever flown during christmas. you're right. |
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you're right. well, listen to me. you need to buy a ticket now. |
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well, listen to me. you need to buy a ticket now. but maybe prices will be cheaper in october. |
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but maybe prices will be cheaper in october. cheaper prices won't do you any good if there are no seats. |
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i hate flying. so do i. |
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so do i. a long time ago, flying used to be okay. |
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a long time ago, flying used to be okay. now it's like riding a bus. |
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now it's like riding a bus. you're jammed in with people all around you. |
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you're jammed in with people all around you. half of them are coughing, and the other half are sneezing. |
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half of them are coughing, and the other half are sneezing. you don't have any elbow room or knee room. |
|
you don't have any elbow room or knee room. people are always getting up to use the bathroom. |
|
people are always getting up to use the bathroom. kids are crying or climbing over you. |
|
kids are crying or climbing over you. it's a flying zoo! |
|
it's a flying zoo! i wish i could afford first class seats. |
|
i wish i could afford first class seats. doesn't everybody? |
|
some guy rowed across the atlantic ocean. good for him. |
|
good for him. why would he do that? |
|
why would he do that? did he set a new record? |
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did he set a new record? yes, i think he did. |
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yes, i think he did. well, i guess that's why he did it. |
|
well, i guess that's why he did it. what's the point? |
|
what's the point? now he has the world record! |
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now he has the world record! but someone's going to break it, so what good is it? |
|
but someone's going to break it, so what good is it? well, he can enjoy it while it lasts. |
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well, he can enjoy it while it lasts. i don't think he even got paid for it. |
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i don't think he even got paid for it. some people do it just to do it. |
|
i want to go on a cruise ship. that sounds like fun. where do you want to go? |
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that sounds like fun. where do you want to go? i want to cruise to hawaii. |
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i want to cruise to hawaii. that should be a nice trip. lots of fun, and lots of food. |
|
that should be a nice trip. lots of fun, and lots of food. i have no idea how much it will cost. |
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i have no idea how much it will cost. i think it depends on the season and on your cabin. |
|
i think it depends on the season and on your cabin. well, of course i want to go when the weather is nice. |
|
well, of course i want to go when the weather is nice. yes, you don't want to travel in winter storms. |
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yes, you don't want to travel in winter storms. and i want to get a big cabin with a view. |
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and i want to get a big cabin with a view. are you going to travel alone? |
|
are you going to travel alone? no, my sister and i will travel together. |
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no, my sister and i will travel together. well, you should go online and try to find a good deal. |
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i hate to fly. because of all the security? |
|
because of all the security? no, because it hurts my ears. |
|
no, because it hurts my ears. what do you mean? |
|
what do you mean? every time we land or take off, my ears hurt so much. |
|
every time we land or take off, my ears hurt so much. that's just the altitude change, i think. |
|
that's just the altitude change, i think. whatever it is, it hurts. |
|
whatever it is, it hurts. can't you take medicine or something for it? |
|
can't you take medicine or something for it? i've tried everything, but nothing works. |
|
i've tried everything, but nothing works. have you tried earplugs? |
|
have you tried earplugs? they don't work, either. |
|
they don't work, either. well, be glad you're not a pilot. |
|
spring break starts tomorrow. are you going to go anywhere? |
|
are you going to go anywhere? i was thinking of driving to arizona. |
|
i was thinking of driving to arizona. to the grand canyon? |
|
to the grand canyon? yes. i've never been there. |
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yes. i've never been there. i was there when i was a kid. |
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i was there when i was a kid. how did you like it? |
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how did you like it? i loved it. i still remember how amazing it was. |
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i loved it. i still remember how amazing it was. i'm sure i'll like it, too. |
|
i'm sure i'll like it, too. you should try riding a mule on a trail to the bottom. |
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you should try riding a mule on a trail to the bottom. no way! i don't want to fall to my death. |
|
no way! i don't want to fall to my death. don't worry. only one person has ever fallen off a mule. |
|
that hotel was terrible. the worst in the whole world. |
|
the worst in the whole world. the walls were so thin. |
|
the walls were so thin. all day long we heard tvs or telephones. |
|
all day long we heard tvs or telephones. all night long we heard people snoring. |
|
all night long we heard people snoring. housekeeping didn't give us fresh towels. |
|
housekeeping didn't give us fresh towels. room service brought us a cold dinner. |
|
room service brought us a cold dinner. our nonsmoking room stunk of cigarette smoke. |
|
our nonsmoking room stunk of cigarette smoke. our room was right next to the elevator and the ice machine. |
|
our room was right next to the elevator and the ice machine. they added phony charges to our bill. |
|
they added phony charges to our bill. how did we end up in that terrible hotel? |
|
how did we end up in that terrible hotel? the travel agent gave us a 50-percent discount! |
|
i have to hang up. i'm so sleepy. it's not even 10 o'clock. |
|
it's not even 10 o'clock. i'm falling asleep on the phone. |
|
i'm falling asleep on the phone. you got up real early. |
|
you got up real early. i had to take my friend to the airport. |
|
i had to take my friend to the airport. why didn't you take a nap when you got home? |
|
why didn't you take a nap when you got home? i didn't get home until 30 minutes ago. |
|
i didn't get home until 30 minutes ago. why is that? |
|
why is that? there was a bomb threat at the airport. |
|
there was a bomb threat at the airport. only a threat? |
|
only a threat? yes, but i was stuck there all day while they looked for the bomb. |
|
yes, but i was stuck there all day while they looked for the bomb. someday the bomb is going to be for real. |
|
my dad went to washington, d.c. why did he do that? |
|
why did he do that? he was invited, along with about 90 other veterans. |
|
he was invited, along with about 90 other veterans. who invited them? |
|
who invited them? some private organization. |
|
some private organization. why did they invite him? |
|
why did they invite him? to thank him and all the other soldiers who served in world war ii. |
|
to thank him and all the other soldiers who served in world war ii. that's very nice. |
|
that's very nice. my dad got to see the beautiful new world war ii monument. |
|
my dad got to see the beautiful new world war ii monument. that trip must have cost a lot of money. |
|
that trip must have cost a lot of money. he said all the money came from private donations. |
|
that was a great trip to washington, d.c. tell me about it, dad. |
|
tell me about it, dad. about 90 of us world war ii veterans got on the plane at 8 a.m. |
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about 90 of us world war ii veterans got on the plane at 8 a.m. how long was the flight? |
|
how long was the flight? it only took about two hours. |
|
it only took about two hours. did you take pictures at the world war ii monument? |
|
did you take pictures at the world war ii monument? oh, yes. we all took lots of pictures. |
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oh, yes. we all took lots of pictures. then you flew back home that evening? |
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then you flew back home that evening? yes. when we landed, tv reporters and the army band were there. |
|
yes. when we landed, tv reporters and the army band were there. that must have made you feel really special. |
|
that must have made you feel really special. oh, it did. there were about 300 people there to honor us. |
|
oh, it did. there were about 300 people there to honor us. well, you all deserve it. you helped save our country. |
|
i need a job. i thought you had a job. |
|
i thought you had a job. i did. |
|
i did. what happened? |
|
what happened? i got laid off. |
|
i got laid off. that's terrible! when did it happen? |
|
that's terrible! when did it happen? i got laid off last week. |
|
i got laid off last week. just you? |
|
just you? no, ten of my coworkers got laid off, too. |
|
no, ten of my coworkers got laid off, too. what are you going to do? |
|
what are you going to do? i'm looking in the newspaper for a job. |
|
i'm looking in the newspaper for a job. good luck! |
|
before you go to that interview, check yourself. what's to check? |
|
what's to check? are your nails clean? |
|
are your nails clean? yes, they are. |
|
yes, they are. did you double-check your nose and teeth? |
|
did you double-check your nose and teeth? they are clean, too. |
|
they are clean, too. did you shine your shoes? |
|
did you shine your shoes? my shoes are shined. |
|
my shoes are shined. do your socks match? |
|
do your socks match? of course they match. |
|
of course they match. no, they don't. one is black and one is dark blue. |
|
no, they don't. one is black and one is dark blue. yikes! thank you. |
|
life is hard. it sure is. |
|
it sure is. i thought school was hard. |
|
i thought school was hard. me, too. i couldn't wait to graduate. |
|
me, too. i couldn't wait to graduate. but now work is hard, too. |
|
but now work is hard, too. i agree. work is just as hard as school. |
|
i agree. work is just as hard as school. sometimes i wish i was back in school. |
|
sometimes i wish i was back in school. me, too. school was fun. |
|
me, too. school was fun. and it was only 12 years. |
|
and it was only 12 years. it went by pretty fast. |
|
it went by pretty fast. but work goes on forever! |
|
but work goes on forever! we have to work for 30 years! |
|
i'm sleepy. so am i. |
|
so am i. i had a long day. |
|
i had a long day. so did i. |
|
so did i. i didn't even have lunch. |
|
i didn't even have lunch. neither did i. |
|
neither did i. i was busy the whole day. |
|
i was busy the whole day. so was i. |
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so was i. i had to bring work home with me. |
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i had to bring work home with me. i did too. |
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i did too. your day was just like mine. |
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your day was just like mine. of course it was. we work together! |
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i don't like my job. what do you do? |
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what do you do? i'm a babysitter. |
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i'm a babysitter. is that a lot of work? |
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is that a lot of work? babies cry all the time. |
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babies cry all the time. you have to change their diapers. |
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you have to change their diapers. i have to feed them. |
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i have to feed them. are you looking for another job? |
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are you looking for another job? no, i'm looking for another family. |
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no, i'm looking for another family. another family? |
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another family? a family with only one baby. |
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a family with only one baby. that's a good idea. |
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i need a job. what was your last job? |
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what was your last job? i was a painter. |
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i was a painter. what happened? |
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what happened? i got laid off because there was no work. |
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i got laid off because there was no work. what else can you do? |
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what else can you do? i'm a handyman. |
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i'm a handyman. can you fix a dripping faucet in a kitchen sink? |
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can you fix a dripping faucet in a kitchen sink? of course. |
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of course. then i have a job for you in my kitchen. |
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then i have a job for you in my kitchen. it will cost you only $20 plus parts. |
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it will cost you only $20 plus parts. okay. that sounds like a fair price. |
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what would you do if you lost your job? i have no idea. i've been here for 20 years. |
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i have no idea. i've been here for 20 years. do you have any other skills? |
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do you have any other skills? well, i know how to flip hamburgers. |
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well, i know how to flip hamburgers. no one would hire you to flip hamburgers. |
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no one would hire you to flip hamburgers. have you heard something that you're not telling me? |
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have you heard something that you're not telling me? what do you mean? |
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what do you mean? are there going to be layoffs at this place? |
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are there going to be layoffs at this place? i certainly hope not! |
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i certainly hope not! if you got laid off, you'd be flipping hamburgers, too. |
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if you got laid off, you'd be flipping hamburgers, too. oh great, we could both work at burger king. |
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oh great, we could both work at burger king. maybe we'd get laid off there, too. |
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do your students ever talk about their jobs? yes, and they ask me what jobs are the best. |
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yes, and they ask me what jobs are the best. i tell my students to become a teacher. |
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i tell my students to become a teacher. teaching is a great job. |
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teaching is a great job. it's the best job i've ever had. |
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it's the best job i've ever had. what makes it so good? |
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what makes it so good? for me, it's the students. |
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for me, it's the students. what do you mean? |
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what do you mean? i mean i have wonderful students. |
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i mean i have wonderful students. that must be nice. |
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that must be nice. teaching is the best part of my whole day. |
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teaching is the best part of my whole day. you're a lucky man to have a job you love. |
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boy, i'm glad that job is finished. how long did it take? |
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how long did it take? four hours, without a break. |
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four hours, without a break. it's always nice to finish a job. |
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it's always nice to finish a job. well, it's good and bad. |
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well, it's good and bad. what's bad about it? |
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what's bad about it? when you finish, all you do is start another job! |
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when you finish, all you do is start another job! yes, that's right. it does get boring. |
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yes, that's right. it does get boring. especially if it's the same work, over and over. |
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especially if it's the same work, over and over. but that's what most people do. |
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but that's what most people do. yes, i guess most of us are stuck in a routine. |
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yes, i guess most of us are stuck in a routine. i wonder if there is any job that you don't repeat over and over. |
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i think i have the worst boss in the world. what makes him so bad? |
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what makes him so bad? he's rude and he yells a lot. |
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he's rude and he yells a lot. that's hard to take. |
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that's hard to take. i've never heard him say please or thank you. |
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i've never heard him say please or thank you. he sounds like a real jerk. |
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he sounds like a real jerk. no one at work likes him. |
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no one at work likes him. can't you report him to his supervisor? |
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can't you report him to his supervisor? of course not. if i do that, i'll lose my job. |
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of course not. if i do that, i'll lose my job. yes, they don't like troublemakers or complainers. |
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yes, they don't like troublemakers or complainers. i can't quit, because i'm making a good salary. |
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i can't quit, because i'm making a good salary. you shouldn't choose money over happiness. |
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what are we going to do? about what? |
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about what? about finding a job for me. |
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about finding a job for me. you don't need a job. i make enough money for both of us. |
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you don't need a job. i make enough money for both of us. that doesn't matter. i don't want to sit around. |
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that doesn't matter. i don't want to sit around. okay, what kind of job do you want? |
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okay, what kind of job do you want? i'm not sure. |
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i'm not sure. well, you should do something that you enjoy. |
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well, you should do something that you enjoy. i enjoy selling. i was born to sell. |
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i enjoy selling. i was born to sell. okay, what do you want to sell? |
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okay, what do you want to sell? cigarette lighters. i'll make a fortune. |
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cigarette lighters. i'll make a fortune. but you hate cigarettes and you hate smoking! |
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a new hotel is looking for workers. yes, i saw it on the tv news. |
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yes, i saw it on the tv news. they need 300 new workers. |
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they need 300 new workers. and 4,000 people showed up. |
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and 4,000 people showed up. so many people are out of work. |
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so many people are out of work. i still have my job, thank goodness. |
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i still have my job, thank goodness. so do i, but i'm worried. |
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so do i, but i'm worried. me too. there are no guarantees. |
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me too. there are no guarantees. if you lose your job, you can move in with me. |
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if you lose your job, you can move in with me. oh, thank you. that's very nice of you. |
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oh, thank you. that's very nice of you. you would do the same for me. |
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you would do the same for me. of course. what are friends for? |
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i think i did something real stupid. what did you do? |
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what did you do? i bought some stock. |
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i bought some stock. everybody buys stock. |
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everybody buys stock. i bought it on a hunch. |
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i bought it on a hunch. you didn't read about the company first? |
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you didn't read about the company first? i didn't have to. it's been in business for 60 years. |
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i didn't have to. it's been in business for 60 years. so what's the problem? |
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so what's the problem? i used all my savings on this one company. |
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i used all my savings on this one company. you put all your eggs into one basket. |
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you put all your eggs into one basket. if the company goes out of business, i'll have nothing. |
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if the company goes out of business, i'll have nothing. oh, you'll have somethingyou'll have a lesson you'll never forget! |
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i was going to be a doctor. what happened to your plans? |
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what happened to your plans? i got a d in college chemistry. |
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i got a d in college chemistry. well, a d is better than an f. |
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well, a d is better than an f. a tutor helped me get the d! |
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a tutor helped me get the d! so, you didn't become a doctor. |
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so, you didn't become a doctor. and now i'm glad that i didn't. |
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and now i'm glad that i didn't. why's that? |
|
why's that? a hospital is the most dangerous place in the world. |
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a hospital is the most dangerous place in the world. oh, yes, because of all the killer germs. |
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oh, yes, because of all the killer germs. if you're a smart doctor, you stay away from hospitals. |
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if you're a smart doctor, you stay away from hospitals. yes, the smart doctors are those tv news doctorsno hospitals, no patients. |
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i want to be a mail carrier when i grow up. why? |
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why? because you get to meet a lot of people. |
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because you get to meet a lot of people. you sure do. |
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you sure do. and you get a lot of exercise every day. |
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and you get a lot of exercise every day. that's the truth. |
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that's the truth. and you get to play with a lot of dogs. |
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and you get to play with a lot of dogs. well, you're supposed to be working. |
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well, you're supposed to be working. yes, but i will always pet the friendly dogs. |
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yes, but i will always pet the friendly dogs. what about the unfriendly dogs? |
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what about the unfriendly dogs? i think if you are friendly to dogs, they are friendly to you. |
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i think if you are friendly to dogs, they are friendly to you. dogs are like peoplenot all of them are friendly. |
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i want to move to new york. to the state or the city? |
|
to the state or the city? to the city, of course. |
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to the city, of course. why do you want to move there? |
|
why do you want to move there? because i want to make a lot of money. |
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because i want to make a lot of money. there are a lot of poor people in new york. |
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there are a lot of poor people in new york. there sure areat least a million. |
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there sure areat least a million. so how do you plan to become rich? |
|
so how do you plan to become rich? i will knock on the doors of all the corporations. |
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i will knock on the doors of all the corporations. that won't make you rich. nobody will talk to you. |
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that won't make you rich. nobody will talk to you. i will keep knocking on doors. |
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i will keep knocking on doors. all you will get is sore knuckles. |
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i love salads. me too. |
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me too. i usually eat a simple salad. |
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i usually eat a simple salad. what do you put in it? |
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what do you put in it? just lettuce, tomato, and celery. |
|
just lettuce, tomato, and celery. that's it? |
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that's it? i add some pepper and salt. |
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i add some pepper and salt. i always put cheese in my salads. |
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i always put cheese in my salads. yes, cheese is nice. |
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yes, cheese is nice. what kind of dressing do you use? |
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what kind of dressing do you use? i pour lots of french dressing on top. |
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i pour lots of french dressing on top. me too. french dressing is so delicious! who cares about calories? |
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i love cheese. me too. |
|
me too. where does cheese come from? |
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where does cheese come from? it comes from cows. |
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it comes from cows. so we get cheese from cows, and we get milk, too? |
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so we get cheese from cows, and we get milk, too? yes, we do. |
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yes, we do. what else do we get from cows? |
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what else do we get from cows? we get hamburgers and steak. |
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we get hamburgers and steak. oh, that's so delicious. |
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oh, that's so delicious. we also get leather. |
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we also get leather. we get a lot of things from cows, don't we? |
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we get a lot of things from cows, don't we? yes. a cow is man's best friend. |
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i used to work in a deli. how did you like it? |
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how did you like it? i loved it! |
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i loved it! did you get free food? |
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did you get free food? i ate free cheese and meat every day. |
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i ate free cheese and meat every day. that sounds like a great job. |
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that sounds like a great job. whatever a customer ordered, i sliced off a little more for me. |
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whatever a customer ordered, i sliced off a little more for me. did you get fat? |
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did you get fat? no, but i did put on a few pounds. |
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no, but i did put on a few pounds. that sounds like a dream job. |
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that sounds like a dream job. it was, until one day my manager caught me. |
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it was, until one day my manager caught me. no more free cheese for you, huh? |
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i'm on a new diet. what are you eating now? |
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what are you eating now? i switched from pasta to potatoes. |
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i switched from pasta to potatoes. why did you do that? |
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why did you do that? pasta is processed food. potatoes are natural food. |
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pasta is processed food. potatoes are natural food. natural food has more vitamins. |
|
natural food has more vitamins. and it's just as easy to prepare. |
|
and it's just as easy to prepare. how do you prepare the potatoes? |
|
how do you prepare the potatoes? i wash them, and then steam them for 15 minutes. |
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i wash them, and then steam them for 15 minutes. that's pretty simple. |
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that's pretty simple. then i add butter, salt, and pepper. |
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then i add butter, salt, and pepper. can i have all those cans of tomato sauce you bought for your pasta? |
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my girlfriend's mom got mad at me at the dinner table. why was that? |
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why was that? i sprinkled salt and pepper on the food before i tasted it. |
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i sprinkled salt and pepper on the food before i tasted it. what's the matter with that? |
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what's the matter with that? her mom is a great cook. |
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her mom is a great cook. so, a little salt and pepper never hurt anything. |
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so, a little salt and pepper never hurt anything. it hurt her feelings. |
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it hurt her feelings. oh. |
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oh. i apologized to her, but i could tell she was still upset. |
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i apologized to her, but i could tell she was still upset. maybe you shouldn't eat there again. |
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maybe you shouldn't eat there again. i'm sure everything will be okay in a day or two. |
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i'm sure everything will be okay in a day or two. it's your girlfriend's fault. she should have warned you. |
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i eat the same thing every day. you're kidding. |
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you're kidding. no, i'm serious. |
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no, i'm serious. doesn't that get old? |
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doesn't that get old? no, because i'm eating food that i like. |
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no, because i'm eating food that i like. but the same thing day after day gets old. |
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but the same thing day after day gets old. well, i guess if it ever does get old, i'll change to something different. |
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well, i guess if it ever does get old, i'll change to something different. do you eat fruits and vegetables every day? |
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do you eat fruits and vegetables every day? no, i hate vegetables. |
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no, i hate vegetables. but you eat fruits. |
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but you eat fruits. i eat two apples, one banana, and one orange every day. |
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i eat two apples, one banana, and one orange every day. well, there's nothing wrong with that. |
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there's something wrong with my orange. what's wrong? |
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what's wrong? it's not orange! |
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it's not orange! your orange isn't orange? |
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your orange isn't orange? no, it's dark pink! |
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no, it's dark pink! are you sure? i never heard of such a thing. |
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are you sure? i never heard of such a thing. i just peeled it, and i'm looking at it right now. |
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i just peeled it, and i'm looking at it right now. let me see. yes, you're right. your orange is pink. |
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let me see. yes, you're right. your orange is pink. who ever heard of such a thing? |
|
who ever heard of such a thing? oh, look. here's the little sticker that was on it. it's called a pink navel. |
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oh, look. here's the little sticker that was on it. it's called a pink navel. what is this world coming to? |
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what is this world coming to? who knows? maybe soon we'll have pink bananas. |
|
i love peanuts. me, too. i love them roasted and salted. |
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me, too. i love them roasted and salted. i love boiled peanuts. |
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i love boiled peanuts. boiled? i never heard of that. |
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boiled? i never heard of that. just boil raw peanuts in salt water until the shells are soft. |
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just boil raw peanuts in salt water until the shells are soft. i'll have to try them sometime. |
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i'll have to try them sometime. they're best when they're hot. |
|
they're best when they're hot. my brother is allergic to peanuts. |
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my brother is allergic to peanuts. that's not good. |
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that's not good. no, it isn't. he almost died when he was little. |
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no, it isn't. he almost died when he was little. i guess he has to be very careful about what he eats. |
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i guess he has to be very careful about what he eats. he has a very strict diet. |
|
i'm gaining weight. how much have you gained? |
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how much have you gained? three pounds just this month. |
|
three pounds just this month. do you know why? |
|
do you know why? i think it's the ice cream. |
|
i think it's the ice cream. you started eating ice cream? |
|
you started eating ice cream? it was on sale. |
|
it was on sale. how much did you buy? |
|
how much did you buy? i filled up my freezer with ice cream. |
|
i filled up my freezer with ice cream. well, it won't last forever. |
|
well, it won't last forever. no, i figure i'll finish it all by next week. |
|
no, i figure i'll finish it all by next week. then you can start losing weight, if there isn't another sale. |
|
i'm stuffed. of course you are. you ate everything on the table. |
|
of course you are. you ate everything on the table. i don't like to eat leftovers. |
|
i don't like to eat leftovers. i'm glad to hear there's something you don't like to eat. |
|
i'm glad to hear there's something you don't like to eat. i like my food hot and fresh. |
|
i like my food hot and fresh. you like to see it disappear. |
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you like to see it disappear. i don't like it reheated. |
|
i don't like it reheated. well, you'll have hot fresh food tomorrow night. |
|
well, you'll have hot fresh food tomorrow night. i'm so full i'm going to burst. |
|
i'm so full i'm going to burst. you should loosen your belt. |
|
you should loosen your belt. i already loosened my belt and unbuttoned my pants. |
|
i already loosened my belt and unbuttoned my pants. well, don't stand up, please. |
|
i saw what you did. i didn't do anything. |
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i didn't do anything. oh yes, you did. |
|
oh yes, you did. what are you talking about? |
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what are you talking about? you know what i'm talking about. |
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you know what i'm talking about. i don't have any idea. |
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i don't have any idea. you know what you did. |
|
you know what you did. maybe i know, but how could you know? |
|
maybe i know, but how could you know? because i was watching you. |
|
because i was watching you. okay, i'm sorry i did it. |
|
okay, i'm sorry i did it. don't drink milk out of the carton. use a glass! |
|
don't drink milk out of the carton. use a glass! i promise i'll never drink out of the carton again. |
|
i like that shirt. so do i. |
|
so do i. how much is it? |
|
how much is it? i don't know. the tag is missing. |
|
i don't know. the tag is missing. ask the clerk. |
|
ask the clerk. i will. |
|
i will. oh, look. here's another shirt just like it. |
|
oh, look. here's another shirt just like it. does it have a price tag? |
|
does it have a price tag? yes, it does. it's only $20. |
|
yes, it does. it's only $20. that's a great price. |
|
that's a great price. i think i'll buy both of them. |
|
i think i'll buy both of them. you'd better try them on first. |
|
i bought you a pair of pants. thank you. |
|
thank you. i hope they fit. |
|
i hope they fit. i hope you kept the receipt. |
|
i hope you kept the receipt. you think they won't fit? |
|
you think they won't fit? i think i've put on some weight. |
|
i think i've put on some weight. you think? |
|
you think? maybe a pound or two. |
|
maybe a pound or two. maybe four or five pounds? |
|
maybe four or five pounds? my waist is bigger than it was. |
|
my waist is bigger than it was. no problem. these pants have an elastic waistband. |
|
no problem. these pants have an elastic waistband. you are so smart! |
|
what do we need to buy? let me look at our list. |
|
let me look at our list. i know that we need milk. |
|
i know that we need milk. nonfat. |
|
nonfat. of course. what else? |
|
of course. what else? we need cheese, bread, and ham. |
|
we need cheese, bread, and ham. what kind of cheese? |
|
what kind of cheese? swiss. |
|
swiss. of course, the cheese with holes in it. |
|
of course, the cheese with holes in it. i never used to buy swiss cheese. |
|
i never used to buy swiss cheese. why not? |
|
why not? i didn't want to pay for the holes. |
|
i need some pants. i thought you just bought a pair. |
|
i thought you just bought a pair. i did. |
|
i did. what's wrong with them so soon? |
|
what's wrong with them so soon? the pants are fine, but the pocket has a huge hole in it. |
|
the pants are fine, but the pocket has a huge hole in it. you shouldn't carry your keys and pens in your pocket. |
|
you shouldn't carry your keys and pens in your pocket. but that's what pockets are for. |
|
but that's what pockets are for. you should carry them in a purse. |
|
you should carry them in a purse. i'm a man, and men don't carry purses! |
|
i'm a man, and men don't carry purses! well, you should buy pants with stronger pockets. |
|
well, you should buy pants with stronger pockets. i would if i could find someone who makes strong pockets. |
|
i would if i could find someone who makes strong pockets. try a google search online. |
|
what are those wipes for? you use them to wipe the handle of the shopping cart. |
|
you use them to wipe the handle of the shopping cart. that's a great idea. |
|
that's a great idea. yes, all the markets just started offering wipes to shoppers. |
|
yes, all the markets just started offering wipes to shoppers. i'm going to take five wipes. |
|
i'm going to take five wipes. what do you need five of them for? |
|
what do you need five of them for? one to wipe the handle, and the others to wipe the produce. |
|
one to wipe the handle, and the others to wipe the produce. what's the matter with the produce? |
|
what's the matter with the produce? do you think the bananas fell from the sky? |
|
do you think the bananas fell from the sky? what do you mean? |
|
what do you mean? i mean, someone used their dirty hands to pick the bananas, the apples, and the oranges. |
|
i mean, someone used their dirty hands to pick the bananas, the apples, and the oranges. well, you better save a wipe for the dirty dollar bills you're going to pay with. |
|
did you go to the 99 cents store? yes, i did. |
|
yes, i did. what did you buy? |
|
what did you buy? well, i got a lot of good deals, as usual. |
|
well, i got a lot of good deals, as usual. like what? |
|
like what? well, a dozen large eggs were only 99 cents. |
|
well, a dozen large eggs were only 99 cents. that's a good deal. |
|
that's a good deal. and a one-pound tub of soft butter was the same price. |
|
and a one-pound tub of soft butter was the same price. another good deal. |
|
another good deal. but the best deal was five pounds of potatoes for 99 cents. |
|
but the best deal was five pounds of potatoes for 99 cents. i don't know how that store makes money. |
|
i don't know how that store makes money. neither do i, but they're doing something right. |
|
i need a new computer. what's the matter with yours? |
|
what's the matter with yours? it's six years old. |
|
it's six years old. that's pretty old. |
|
that's pretty old. it still works, but i'm going to give it to a charity. |
|
it still works, but i'm going to give it to a charity. are you going to buy a desktop or laptop? |
|
are you going to buy a desktop or laptop? oh, a laptop, of course. |
|
oh, a laptop, of course. a pc or a mac? |
|
a pc or a mac? i haven't decided yet. |
|
i haven't decided yet. more and more people are using macs. |
|
more and more people are using macs. but 90 percent of the world uses pcs. |
|
but 90 percent of the world uses pcs. and that's not going to change anytime soon. |
|
i got ripped off. what happened? |
|
what happened? i had a car problem, so i went online. |
|
i had a car problem, so i went online. did you find a solution? |
|
did you find a solution? yes, i did. a site i went to said they would send me the solution. |
|
yes, i did. a site i went to said they would send me the solution. so, what's the problem? |
|
so, what's the problem? i sent them $20 using my credit card, but they never sent me the solution. |
|
i sent them $20 using my credit card, but they never sent me the solution. what are you going to do? |
|
what are you going to do? i sent them an email asking for my money back. |
|
i sent them an email asking for my money back. have you heard from them? |
|
have you heard from them? not yet. it's been a week. |
|
not yet. it's been a week. well, i guess that's a $20 lesson for you. |
|
where's the pencil sharpener? which one? |
|
which one? any one. i need to sharpen this pencil. |
|
any one. i need to sharpen this pencil. i think there's one on the dining room table. |
|
i think there's one on the dining room table. i already looked there. |
|
i already looked there. did you look in the desk drawer? |
|
did you look in the desk drawer? yes, i looked there, too. |
|
yes, i looked there, too. don't we have about five sharpeners? |
|
don't we have about five sharpeners? yes, but they seem to have legs. |
|
yes, but they seem to have legs. tomorrow i'm going to buy an electric sharpener. |
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tomorrow i'm going to buy an electric sharpener. get one with the rubber suction cups on the bottom. |
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get one with the rubber suction cups on the bottom. yes. that way it will stay where i put it. |
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i'm trying to stretch my dollars. how are you doing that? |
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how are you doing that? i started shopping at the dollar store. |
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i started shopping at the dollar store. that saves a lot of money. |
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that saves a lot of money. i bought three pounds of potatoes for a dollar. |
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i bought three pounds of potatoes for a dollar. that's a good deal. |
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that's a good deal. yes, even though some of the potatoes had eyes. |
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yes, even though some of the potatoes had eyes. just put them in the fridge. |
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just put them in the fridge. also, i bought a can of cheap coffee and a bag of good coffee. |
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also, i bought a can of cheap coffee and a bag of good coffee. why did you do that? |
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why did you do that? i mixed them together. |
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i mixed them together. if the coffee still tastes okay, that's a good idea. |
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i really like this house. can we afford it? |
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can we afford it? they want 20 percent down. |
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they want 20 percent down. that's a lot of money. |
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that's a lot of money. but the house is so nice. |
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but the house is so nice. it's in a great neighborhood. |
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it's in a great neighborhood. it's close to the beach. |
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it's close to the beach. it's close to the freeways. |
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it's close to the freeways. it's got a big yard. |
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it's got a big yard. the kids love the house, too. |
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the kids love the house, too. if we don't buy it, someone else will. |
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if we don't buy it, someone else will. you're right. let's buy it now. we can worry later. |
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we can't afford this house. are you sure? |
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are you sure? we will be house rich, but cash poor. |
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we will be house rich, but cash poor. what do you mean? |
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what do you mean? our monthly payments will be too high. |
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our monthly payments will be too high. we won't have any money for other things? |
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we won't have any money for other things? no, we won't have money for gas or food. |
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no, we won't have money for gas or food. we'll be eating peanut butter sandwiches? |
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we'll be eating peanut butter sandwiches? without the peanut butter! |
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without the peanut butter! that's no good! |
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that's no good! we have to find a cheaper house. |
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we have to find a cheaper house. of course. we can't live without gas or peanut butter. |
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that is a beautiful house. i don't like it. |
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i don't like it. what's the matter with it? |
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what's the matter with it? it's on the corner. |
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it's on the corner. so? |
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so? that means it gets twice as much traffic. |
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that means it gets twice as much traffic. you're right. |
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you're right. when you're inside, you will always hear cars stopping and stopping at the intersection. |
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when you're inside, you will always hear cars stopping and stopping at the intersection. or you'll hear the collision if someone doesn't stop. |
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or you'll hear the collision if someone doesn't stop. or you'll see the collision if they crash into the house. |
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or you'll see the collision if they crash into the house. let's find a house that's at the end of a dead end. |
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let's find a house that's at the end of a dead end. that's perfect. the less traffic, the better. |
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i hate looking for an apartment. me, too. |
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me, too. we have a 2 o'clock appointment to see the one on main street. |
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we have a 2 o'clock appointment to see the one on main street. we'd better get ready to go. |
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we'd better get ready to go. it's an upstairs unit. |
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it's an upstairs unit. that's good, because i don't want to live under people with loud feet. |
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that's good, because i don't want to live under people with loud feet. and it's a corner unit. |
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and it's a corner unit. that's great. we won't have neighbors on both sides of us. |
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that's great. we won't have neighbors on both sides of us. no pets are allowed. |
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no pets are allowed. perfect. we don't have to listen to barking dogs. |
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perfect. we don't have to listen to barking dogs. and there are only six units in the whole building. |
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and there are only six units in the whole building. where's the checkbook? i'm ready to rent it without even seeing it. |
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did you call the manager? yes. he said he'd come over tomorrow. |
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yes. he said he'd come over tomorrow. did he say what time? |
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did he say what time? yes. he said he'd be here at 9 o'clock. |
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yes. he said he'd be here at 9 o'clock. did he understand what the problem is? |
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did he understand what the problem is? yes. i told him our doorbell doesn't work. |
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yes. i told him our doorbell doesn't work. it shouldn't take him long to fix it. |
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it shouldn't take him long to fix it. i don't even know why we need to fix it. |
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i don't even know why we need to fix it. in case we have visitors. |
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in case we have visitors. but they can just knock on the door. |
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but they can just knock on the door. actually, i want him to look at our carpet, too. |
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actually, i want him to look at our carpet, too. yes, it would be nice if he'd give us a new carpet. |
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do you like this house? yes, it's beautiful. |
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yes, it's beautiful. it's perfect for us and the kids. |
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it's perfect for us and the kids. three bedrooms, three bathrooms, and a big back yard. |
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three bedrooms, three bathrooms, and a big back yard. and we can afford it! |
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and we can afford it! so are we going to buy it? |
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so are we going to buy it? i'm afraid not. |
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i'm afraid not. it's too far from your job, isn't it? |
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it's too far from your job, isn't it? i can't spend four hours on the road every day. |
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i can't spend four hours on the road every day. by the time you get home, you'll be too tired to even eat. |
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by the time you get home, you'll be too tired to even eat. i won't be able to play with the kids. |
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i won't be able to play with the kids. no, we have to find something closer to your job. |
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boy, it's chilly outside, isn't it? it sure is. |
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it sure is. in fact, it's chilly in the apartment, too. |
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in fact, it's chilly in the apartment, too. let's turn on the heat. |
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let's turn on the heat. i'll check to make sure that all the windows are shut. |
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i'll check to make sure that all the windows are shut. it should be warmer in a few minutes. |
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it should be warmer in a few minutes. it's so nice to have a heated apartment. |
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it's so nice to have a heated apartment. how did they survive in the old days? |
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how did they survive in the old days? they had fireplaces. |
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they had fireplaces. someone had to chop the wood. |
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someone had to chop the wood. and carry it into the house. |
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and carry it into the house. all we have to do is flip a switch. |
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this is a nice neighborhood. the streets are clean and quiet. |
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the streets are clean and quiet. the neighbors don't party on the weekends. |
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the neighbors don't party on the weekends. people take care of their lawns. |
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people take care of their lawns. no rusty old cars are sitting in the front yards. |
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no rusty old cars are sitting in the front yards. we never have to call the police about anything. |
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we never have to call the police about anything. our kids are completely safe. |
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our kids are completely safe. so why are we selling our house? |
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so why are we selling our house? they're building a 3-story apartment building on the corner. |
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they're building a 3-story apartment building on the corner. so we've got to sell before property values go down? |
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so we've got to sell before property values go down? yes. i still can't believe our city council allowed this building. |
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yes. i still can't believe our city council allowed this building. they're probably getting something under the table. |
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that was a huge fire in santa barbara. yes, it was. |
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yes, it was. they said about 30 houses burned to the ground. |
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they said about 30 houses burned to the ground. and they were expensive houses. |
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and they were expensive houses. i feel so sorry for those people. |
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i feel so sorry for those people. why feel sorry for rich people? |
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why feel sorry for rich people? i feel sorry for anyone who loses their home. |
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i feel sorry for anyone who loses their home. so do i, but not if they're rich. |
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so do i, but not if they're rich. what does that have to do with it? |
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what does that have to do with it? rich people think they're better than us. |
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rich people think they're better than us. how many rich people do you know? |
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how many rich people do you know? none. |
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bears are invading our neighborhoods. of course they are. they're starving to death. |
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of course they are. they're starving to death. they should stay in the woods where they belong. |
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they should stay in the woods where they belong. there's no food in the woods. |
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there's no food in the woods. can't they eat grass? |
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can't they eat grass? do you think a bear is a cow? |
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do you think a bear is a cow? well, i've seen them eating berries. |
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well, i've seen them eating berries. berries aren't in season all year round. |
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berries aren't in season all year round. it's too dangerous for kids and pets. |
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it's too dangerous for kids and pets. people need to cover their trash cans. |
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people need to cover their trash cans. the police need to shoot all the bears. |
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the police need to shoot all the bears. you don't solve a problem by shooting it. |
|
who did you vote for? i voted for obama. |
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i voted for obama. me too. |
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me too. he will be a great president. |
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he will be a great president. everyone likes him. |
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everyone likes him. he's a good speaker. |
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he's a good speaker. and he's really smart. |
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and he's really smart. he will solve our problems. |
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he will solve our problems. he will end the war. |
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he will end the war. the next four years will be good years. |
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the next four years will be good years. i'll vote for him next time, too. |
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i'll vote for him next time, too. i think everyone will. |
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the election is next week. who are you voting for? |
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who are you voting for? i'm not voting for the mayor. |
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i'm not voting for the mayor. why not? |
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why not? he made promises that he didn't keep. |
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he made promises that he didn't keep. like what? |
|
like what? he promised to hire 1,000 more police officers. |
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he promised to hire 1,000 more police officers. how many did he hire? |
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how many did he hire? one hundred! |
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one hundred! maybe he had a good reason. |
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maybe he had a good reason. maybe he's just a liar. |
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maybe he's just a liar. maybe i'll vote for someone else, too. |
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i can't believe he won the election. only 15 percent of the voters turned out. |
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only 15 percent of the voters turned out. that is a joke. |
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that is a joke. voting is so important, but people don't bother. |
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voting is so important, but people don't bother. many people think their vote doesn't matter. |
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many people think their vote doesn't matter. the mayor won by only 2,000 votes. |
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the mayor won by only 2,000 votes. we're stuck with him for four more years. |
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we're stuck with him for four more years. voting is so easy. you can even mail your ballot in. |
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voting is so easy. you can even mail your ballot in. all you have to do is vote and put a stamp on it. |
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all you have to do is vote and put a stamp on it. how easy is that? |
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how easy is that? i guess people just don't care. |
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i guess people just don't care. they'll care when they see their taxes go up. |
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well, we have a new president. but we have the same old problems. |
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but we have the same old problems. well, he's made a few changes. |
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well, he's made a few changes. like what? |
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like what? i think he closed the bowling alley in the white house. |
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i think he closed the bowling alley in the white house. oh, yeah. he's changing it to a basketball court. |
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oh, yeah. he's changing it to a basketball court. who's paying for that? |
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who's paying for that? i think we are! |
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i think we are! well, that's okay, as long as it helps him relax and think more clearly. |
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well, that's okay, as long as it helps him relax and think more clearly. yes, we need a relaxed president who thinks clearly. |
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yes, we need a relaxed president who thinks clearly. do any other world leaders have a basketball court? |
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do any other world leaders have a basketball court? they will. you know america always leads the way. |
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people say that everybody loves obama. well, more than 50 million people voted for mccain. |
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well, more than 50 million people voted for mccain. that's 50 million people who don't love obama. |
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that's 50 million people who don't love obama. obama's got four years to make everyone happy. |
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obama's got four years to make everyone happy. he's never going to make everyone happy. |
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he's never going to make everyone happy. can you imagine being president? |
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can you imagine being president? everyone wants you to solve their problems. |
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everyone wants you to solve their problems. i have enough stress from trying to solve my own problems. |
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i have enough stress from trying to solve my own problems. you and everybody else. |
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you and everybody else. i would never want to be president. |
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i would never want to be president. but think about all the power you'd have. |
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but think about all the power you'd have. i prefer my quiet little life to all the power in the world. |
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did you read this article? what article? |
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what article? it says the mayor spends only 11 percent of his time on city duties. |
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it says the mayor spends only 11 percent of his time on city duties. only 11 percent? |
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only 11 percent? about 50 percent of the time he's traveling. |
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about 50 percent of the time he's traveling. where does he travel to? |
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where does he travel to? oh, all over the world. |
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oh, all over the world. but he's supposed to be making our city a better place. |
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but he's supposed to be making our city a better place. he's visiting other cities to get ideas. |
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he's visiting other cities to get ideas. can't he just go online? |
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can't he just go online? the rest of the time he's raising money for his reelection. |
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the rest of the time he's raising money for his reelection. well, he'll never get reelected once this news gets out. |
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who did you vote for for president? i voted for ralph nader. |
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i voted for ralph nader. who in the world is ralph nader? |
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who in the world is ralph nader? he's the best man for president. |
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he's the best man for president. why's that? |
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why's that? he hates corporations. |
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he hates corporations. well, most corporations do think only about money. |
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well, most corporations do think only about money. he hates democrats and republicans. |
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he hates democrats and republicans. well, they do put their party before their country. |
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well, they do put their party before their country. he's the only candidate that i trust. |
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he's the only candidate that i trust. but he didn't have a chance. nobody voted for him! |
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but he didn't have a chance. nobody voted for him! sooner or later, voters will wake up. |
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i don't know why i bother to vote. why's that? |
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why's that? what good does it do? |
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what good does it do? you get to put someone in power that you like. |
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you get to put someone in power that you like. only if my candidate wins. |
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only if my candidate wins. well, he can't win unless you and others vote for him. |
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well, he can't win unless you and others vote for him. but even if my candidate wins, he'll break his promises. |
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but even if my candidate wins, he'll break his promises. that's true. they promise anything just so they get elected. |
|
that's true. they promise anything just so they get elected. and when elected, they go their own way. |
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and when elected, they go their own way. they forget who put them in power. |
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they forget who put them in power. they forget where they came from. |
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they forget where they came from. maybe you should run for office. |
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that election for u.s. senator stunk. what do you mean? |
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what do you mean? there were more votes than voters! |
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there were more votes than voters! but that's impossible. |
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but that's impossible. officials said that it's possible. |
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officials said that it's possible. did they explain how it's possible? |
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did they explain how it's possible? no. they said there are some things you can't explain. |
|
no. they said there are some things you can't explain. so are they going to hold another election? |
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so are they going to hold another election? no. that will cost too much money. |
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no. that will cost too much money. so it's better to save money than to have an honest election? |
|
so it's better to save money than to have an honest election? well, the democratic party says it was an honest election. |
|
well, the democratic party says it was an honest election. of course they say thattheir man won! |
|
i see that former president bush is at a conference. yes. he's telling jokes about his eight years as president. |
|
yes. he's telling jokes about his eight years as president. yes, those eight years were a lot of fun for everyone. |
|
yes, those eight years were a lot of fun for everyone. only 4,000 american soldiers were killed overseas. |
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only 4,000 american soldiers were killed overseas. not to mention 40,000 wounded soldiers. |
|
not to mention 40,000 wounded soldiers. but bush visited some of them in the hospital once. |
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but bush visited some of them in the hospital once. that's nice that he found the time to make a visit. |
|
that's nice that he found the time to make a visit. he spoke to them and made them feel better. |
|
he spoke to them and made them feel better. did he speak to every family that lost a soldier? |
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did he speak to every family that lost a soldier? no, he didn't have time to do that. |
|
no, he didn't have time to do that. well, he's got plenty of time now! |
|
well, he's got plenty of time now! no, he's too busy writing a book about how hard it was to be president. |
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did you get your official sample ballot? yes, with the voter instructions. |
|
yes, with the voter instructions. how are you going to vote? |
|
how are you going to vote? same as ever, by mail. all it costs me is a 42-cent stamp. |
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same as ever, by mail. all it costs me is a 42-cent stamp. i meant, are you going to vote for or against the new taxes? |
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i meant, are you going to vote for or against the new taxes? against all of them, of course. |
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against all of them, of course. but we need new taxes to pay for highways, schools, and prisons. |
|
but we need new taxes to pay for highways, schools, and prisons. we've already voted for new taxes to pay for all that stuff! |
|
we've already voted for new taxes to pay for all that stuff! that's true. where did that money go? |
|
that's true. where did that money go? our legislators spent it on first-class travel all over the world. |
|
our legislators spent it on first-class travel all over the world. they are having a good time with our money. |
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they are having a good time with our money. so when are we going to stop giving them more? |
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have you decided how you are going to vote? do you mean on measures 1, 2, and 3? |
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do you mean on measures 1, 2, and 3? yes. the ones that will improve our schools, roads, and hospitals. |
|
yes. the ones that will improve our schools, roads, and hospitals. you mean the measures that will raise our taxes. |
|
you mean the measures that will raise our taxes. but the tv ads say that our taxes will not increase. |
|
but the tv ads say that our taxes will not increase. do you believe the tv ads? |
|
do you believe the tv ads? i like the one where the fireman tells us why we should vote yes. |
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i like the one where the fireman tells us why we should vote yes. don't believe him! whatever the tv ads tell you, the opposite is true. |
|
don't believe him! whatever the tv ads tell you, the opposite is true. but the title of measure 1 is "better schools at no cost." |
|
but the title of measure 1 is "better schools at no cost." the title should be "better schools at huge cost." |
|
the title should be "better schools at huge cost." i can't believe that they would lie to us. |
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i can't believe that they would lie to us. of course they liethat's what politicians do! |
|
i have a stomachache. is it something you ate? |
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is it something you ate? maybe. i'm not sure. |
|
maybe. i'm not sure. what did you have for breakfast? |
|
what did you have for breakfast? the usual, cereal with milk and a banana. |
|
the usual, cereal with milk and a banana. maybe the milk was bad. |
|
maybe the milk was bad. it didn't smell bad. |
|
it didn't smell bad. maybe the banana was bad. |
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maybe the banana was bad. no, the banana was delicious. |
|
no, the banana was delicious. maybe you just need to go to the bathroom. |
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maybe you just need to go to the bathroom. no, that's not the problem. |
|
no, that's not the problem. maybe it will go away in a little while. |
|
what's this stain? i don't know. |
|
i don't know. it looks like blood. |
|
it looks like blood. i think my nose was bleeding. |
|
i think my nose was bleeding. you should wet your shirt immediately. |
|
you should wet your shirt immediately. why? |
|
why? because that gets the blood out of the shirt. |
|
because that gets the blood out of the shirt. what's a little blood? |
|
what's a little blood? your white shirt is ruined. |
|
your white shirt is ruined. so, i'll just buy another one. |
|
so, i'll just buy another one. you can wear this one around the house. |
|
you can wear this one around the house. next time i'll soak it immediately. |
|
my fingers hurt. why do they hurt? |
|
why do they hurt? i type too much. |
|
i type too much. you should take a break. |
|
you should take a break. i need to type to make money. |
|
i need to type to make money. but typing is causing you pain. |
|
but typing is causing you pain. maybe i should see a doctor. |
|
maybe i should see a doctor. doctors are too expensive. |
|
doctors are too expensive. he might tell me to rest for a while. |
|
he might tell me to rest for a while. he might want to cut you open. |
|
he might want to cut you open. he might say i'm okay. |
|
he might say i'm okay. he might say you have bone cancer. |
|
what did the doctor say? he thinks i have too much stress. |
|
he thinks i have too much stress. stress causes your stomachaches? |
|
stress causes your stomachaches? stress causes different problems with different people. |
|
stress causes different problems with different people. so what did he tell you to do? |
|
so what did he tell you to do? he said i need to think positive. |
|
he said i need to think positive. he didn't give you any medication? |
|
he didn't give you any medication? i hate medication. it makes me feel different. |
|
i hate medication. it makes me feel different. so how do you think positive? |
|
so how do you think positive? i think about nice things. |
|
i think about nice things. like what? |
|
like what? like a day at the beach, with my toes in the sand. |
|
i cut my finger. how did you do that? |
|
how did you do that? it's a paper cut. |
|
it's a paper cut. paper can be dangerous. |
|
paper can be dangerous. it hurts, too. |
|
it hurts, too. paper cuts can hurt a lot. |
|
paper cuts can hurt a lot. where are the band-aids? |
|
where are the band-aids? i think they're in the medicine cabinet. |
|
i think they're in the medicine cabinet. it's on the tip of my finger. |
|
it's on the tip of my finger. a band-aid might not work. |
|
a band-aid might not work. i must not use this finger until the cut heals. |
|
i must not use this finger until the cut heals. it might take a day or two to heal. |
|
do you smell that? oh, yes. |
|
oh, yes. i can't stand cigarette smoke. |
|
i can't stand cigarette smoke. it smells so bad. |
|
it smells so bad. one cigarette stinks up the whole sidewalk. |
|
one cigarette stinks up the whole sidewalk. smokers think they are so cool. |
|
smokers think they are so cool. they are so weak. |
|
they are so weak. a little cigarette controls them. |
|
a little cigarette controls them. they look so stupid taking a puff. |
|
they look so stupid taking a puff. and then they blow smoke out of their mouth. |
|
and then they blow smoke out of their mouth. they think it's cool. |
|
they think it's cool. cigarettes stink. |
|
do you have a cold? yes, i do. |
|
yes, i do. how did you get it? |
|
how did you get it? my sister had a cold. she gave it to me. |
|
my sister had a cold. she gave it to me. have you taken anything for your cold? |
|
have you taken anything for your cold? no, i just blow my nose a lot. |
|
no, i just blow my nose a lot. your nose is stopped up? |
|
your nose is stopped up? yes. i have to breathe through my mouth. |
|
yes. i have to breathe through my mouth. have you tried nose drops? |
|
have you tried nose drops? no, i don't like nose drops. |
|
no, i don't like nose drops. they work great. |
|
they work great. i don't care. i don't like to put drops in my nose. |
|
would you put suntan lotion on my back, please? sure. |
|
sure. thank you. |
|
thank you. you shouldn't lie in the sun for too long. |
|
you shouldn't lie in the sun for too long. i want to get a tan. i don't want to look so pale. |
|
i want to get a tan. i don't want to look so pale. what's wrong with looking pale? |
|
what's wrong with looking pale? people think you might be sick. |
|
people think you might be sick. who thinks that? |
|
who thinks that? i don't know. |
|
i don't know. it's better to be pale than to have skin cancer. |
|
it's better to be pale than to have skin cancer. i know that. |
|
i know that. so why are you arguing with me? don't lie in the sun too long! |
|
i can't quit smoking. of course you can. |
|
of course you can. i don't have enough will power. |
|
i don't have enough will power. of course you do. |
|
of course you do. i wish i had never started. |
|
i wish i had never started. so does every smoker. |
|
so does every smoker. i've tried to quit so many times. |
|
i've tried to quit so many times. so has everyone else. |
|
so has everyone else. nothing seems to work. |
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nothing seems to work. all it takes is will power, and you have it. |
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all it takes is will power, and you have it. then why can't i quit? |
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then why can't i quit? you have to believe in yourself. |
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my back is killing me. what did you do? |
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what did you do? i got out of my car. |
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i got out of my car. that's it? |
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that's it? i injured my back one time just by sneezing. |
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i injured my back one time just by sneezing. you should see a doctor. |
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you should see a doctor. my doctor said i need surgery. |
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my doctor said i need surgery. so? |
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so? so, forget it. |
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so, forget it. you don't have the money? |
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you don't have the money? i have no insurance. |
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i have no insurance. maybe a back rub would help. |
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my brother smokes three packs a day. three packs of what? |
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three packs of what? cigarettes, of course. |
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cigarettes, of course. how can he do that? |
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how can he do that? when he is almost finished with one cigarette, he uses it to light another. |
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when he is almost finished with one cigarette, he uses it to light another. he's a chain smoker. |
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he's a chain smoker. he's been a chain smoker for 30 years. |
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he's been a chain smoker for 30 years. that's unbelievable. can he still breathe? |
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that's unbelievable. can he still breathe? he can, but the people around him can't. |
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he can, but the people around him can't. how can he still be alive? |
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how can he still be alive? his doctor says his heart and lungs are strong and healthy. |
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his doctor says his heart and lungs are strong and healthy. maybe i should start smoking. |
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i hate brushing my teeth. it's such a chore. |
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it's such a chore. brush, brush. spit, spit. |
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brush, brush. spit, spit. what did they do in the old days? |
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what did they do in the old days? they brushed with their fingers. |
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they brushed with their fingers. they also ate with their fingers! |
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they also ate with their fingers! why do they call it the good old days? |
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why do they call it the good old days? maybe because they didn't have to brush and floss. |
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maybe because they didn't have to brush and floss. who invented flossing? |
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who invented flossing? a dentist, i'm sure. |
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a dentist, i'm sure. i hate flossing more than brushing! |
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i hate flossing more than brushing! i can't wait till all my teeth fall out. |
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let's stop for a while. i need a break and some water. this trail is hard to climb. |
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this trail is hard to climb. especially on a hot day like this. |
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especially on a hot day like this. i can't believe we haven't seen any animals. |
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i can't believe we haven't seen any animals. thank goodness! i don't want to see any wild animals. |
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thank goodness! i don't want to see any wild animals. all we've seen so far is a couple of lizards. |
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all we've seen so far is a couple of lizards. we're hiking to lose weight, not to see goats and bears. |
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we're hiking to lose weight, not to see goats and bears. i bet i've lost a couple of pounds already. |
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i bet i've lost a couple of pounds already. all you've lost is some sweat. |
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all you've lost is some sweat. i haven't even lost one pound of fat? |
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i haven't even lost one pound of fat? if you want to lose fat, you've got to do this hike every day. |
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if you want to lose fat, you've got to do this hike every day. okay, but let's hike in town. at least there are cats and dogs to see. |
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oh no, another pimple on my face. pimples suck. |
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pimples suck. it seems like i get a new pimple almost every day. |
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it seems like i get a new pimple almost every day. maybe it's something in your diet. |
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maybe it's something in your diet. no, i eat the same things day after day. |
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no, i eat the same things day after day. then maybe it's in your genes. |
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then maybe it's in your genes. you might be right. |
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you might be right. do pimples run in your family? |
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do pimples run in your family? not that i've noticed. |
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not that i've noticed. well, maybe it's from the pollution in the air. |
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well, maybe it's from the pollution in the air. whatever the cause, i hate seeing them on my face. |
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whatever the cause, i hate seeing them on my face. well, on the bright side, they're fun to pop. |
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do you believe everything you hear? i don't believe anything i don't see with my own eyes. |
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i don't believe anything i don't see with my own eyes. you can't believe what you hear on tv or radio. |
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you can't believe what you hear on tv or radio. you can't believe what you read in the newspapers. |
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you can't believe what you read in the newspapers. everyone tells you a different story about the same thing. |
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everyone tells you a different story about the same thing. three different people will give you three different stories. |
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three different people will give you three different stories. and the government will give you a fourth story. |
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and the government will give you a fourth story. yes, like the government says not to worry about the swine flu. |
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yes, like the government says not to worry about the swine flu. but the swine flu just killed 20 people in mexico. |
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but the swine flu just killed 20 people in mexico. the government says we have nothing to worry about. |
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the government says we have nothing to worry about. then why are some schools telling the kids to stay home? |
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then why are some schools telling the kids to stay home? the government says to wash our hands frequently, and we'll all be okay. |
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don't pick your nose. i wasn't picking my nose. |
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i wasn't picking my nose. what were you doing? |
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what were you doing? i was scratching my nose. |
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i was scratching my nose. i think i know the difference between picking and scratching. |
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i think i know the difference between picking and scratching. okay, mom, maybe i was picking it a little bit. |
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okay, mom, maybe i was picking it a little bit. use a tissue next time. |
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use a tissue next time. i didn't have a tissue. |
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i didn't have a tissue. then wait till you find a tissue. |
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then wait till you find a tissue. i couldn't wait. it was an emergency. |
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i couldn't wait. it was an emergency. oh, really? maybe you should have called 911. |
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oh, really? maybe you should have called 911. it wasn't that kind of emergency. |
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our tv remote is filthy. yes, it's covered with crud. |
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yes, it's covered with crud. i'm going to clean it. |
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i'm going to clean it. don't use water on it! |
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don't use water on it! i'll use a damp cloth. |
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i'll use a damp cloth. don't let water get into any of the cracks. |
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don't let water get into any of the cracks. i'll squeeze the cloth so it's almost dry. |
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i'll squeeze the cloth so it's almost dry. don't rub the numbers off the remote. |
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don't rub the numbers off the remote. i will rub gently but firmly. |
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i will rub gently but firmly. do it quickly, please, so i can change channels during commercials. |
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do it quickly, please, so i can change channels during commercials. i'll give it back to you in a couple of minutes. |
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i'll give it back to you in a couple of minutes. maybe we should put it in a plastic bag to keep it clean. |
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my ear is killing me. what's the matter? |
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what's the matter? i was on a plane. |
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i was on a plane. so? |
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so? so, every time the plane goes up, my ear starts to hurt. |
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so, every time the plane goes up, my ear starts to hurt. that's no good. |
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that's no good. sometimes the pain goes away, and sometimes it doesn't. |
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sometimes the pain goes away, and sometimes it doesn't. have you seen a doctor? |
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have you seen a doctor? i've been to two doctors. |
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i've been to two doctors. and they couldn't fix your problem? |
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and they couldn't fix your problem? they both said i have to live with it. |
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they both said i have to live with it. or you can stay off planes. |
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did you see the woman with the new face? did she get a nice job? |
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did she get a nice job? she got an "everything" job! |
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she got an "everything" job! what do you mean? |
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what do you mean? a team of doctors gave her a whole new face. |
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a team of doctors gave her a whole new face. why did they do that? |
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why did they do that? a mad dog bit most of her face off. |
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a mad dog bit most of her face off. oh, that's terrible. what does she look like now? |
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oh, that's terrible. what does she look like now? her face is really fat, but they say the swelling will go down. |
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her face is really fat, but they say the swelling will go down. and then will she look normal again? |
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and then will she look normal again? i guess so. |
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i guess so. god bless modern medicine. |
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there's something wrong with my right hand. what's wrong with it? |
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what's wrong with it? it aches most of the time. |
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it aches most of the time. what do you think it is? |
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what do you think it is? i don't know. i think it's old age. |
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i don't know. i think it's old age. if it's old age, why don't both of your hands hurt? |
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if it's old age, why don't both of your hands hurt? that's a good question. maybe it's not old age. |
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that's a good question. maybe it's not old age. are you right-handed? |
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are you right-handed? yes. all my life. |
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yes. all my life. you're wearing out your right hand. stop using it so much. |
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you're wearing out your right hand. stop using it so much. but i do all my writing with my right hand. |
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but i do all my writing with my right hand. start typing instead. that way your left hand will do half the work. |