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r/relationship_advice TITLE: [16/f] want to break up with my bf [22/m]. Never ended a relationship before, need advice :/ POST: Okay okay, I know what half of you are going to say.. 'Pedo' amirite? lol Well let me tell the story. We've been together for 2 and a bit years now. I am just starting to miss being single. All the people I have talked to have said "That is completely normal - you're young, you're allowed to be single and have fun!" and thats what I want. I want to have fun. I want to get the chance to flirt with other guys.. considering, I have always been quite flirtatious. (Not sexually - just mucking around and making fun of guys. All of my best friends are male!) My current boyfriend, I love him a lot. I really do. But I just don't see him in my future anymore. I am starting to find him unattractive, by things that have always been unattractive to me. He smokes, he does pot, he is violent, he does nothing but play his video games and he always puts me down.. I never realized how much he put me down until I began to fall out of love with him. He doesn't like any career choices I make. (i.e. I had planned all my senior year studies so that I could get into psychology at UNI and study to be a psychologist, so I can become a student counsellor. But no, that wouldn't make enough money for him :/) When I confront him about it he always says "I didn't mean it, I was just angry" I am finding it hard to figure out how to break up with him because we've made many friends together and I know they will all hate me if I end it. Also he is very violent and quite terrifying and I don't want to get hurt.. :/ Please help me reddit.. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: Me [32 M] friends with [40 M] and [42 F] who divorced and im having trouble deciding if i can be both of their friends still. POST: in short these two were together when i met them. i met the guy through a mutual friend and we all became friends. in the process i met this guys wife and also became good friends with her. well several years later the guy cheats on his wife. divorces her and gets the girl he cheated on with pregnant. the girl he cheated with was another friends wife and that lead to the other couple getting divorced also. after all that settled i am still friends with everyone. and i was invited to go to a the guys birthday party this weekend. but something tells me i shouldn't cause i don't morally agree with what he has done over the last 6 months. should i go and not worry about it. also i probably should add that my close group of friends that i have been with for 20+ years are all the ones throwing him the birthday party. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: [18M] next steps after drunk texting [18F] POST: Ok so there's this girl (18F) who's in my halls of residence at uni who I've know for a few weeks now. I see her around but she's not in my block so I don't see her all the time. Now I quite like her but I know she has a boyfriend so I never did anything about it. The thing is, we've danced in clubs together when everyone's gone out together and it seemed like she might like me too. However last night I saw her kissing some random dude in a club and obviously I was a little pissed about that. Then, after having way too much to drink I texted her saying I really liked her and she was being a horrible person for kissing that guy when she has a boyfriend and basically just shaming her. She kind of apologised and said she felt bad and also that she had no idea I liked her and thought we were just friends. I felt really bad the next morning so I texted her to say sorry, I was really drunk, let's forget that ever happened etc. And she texted back saying it's fine but she doesn't want to talk about it. So I haven't texted her back since she says she doesn't want to talk about it, and I'm wondering what my next move should be. I really want us to stay friends and I don't want things to become really awkward between us. I'm wondering if I should try and meet up and apologise in person and talk things through but she said she didn't want to talk about it. So what should I do guys? TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: I (M 20) just found out that I was the other guy after my girlfriend (F 20) cheated on me. Should I tell him what she's doing? POST: After six months of dating, my girlfriend (Taylor) and I broke up after I saw her kissing another guy. Today I ran into a mutual friend (Maddie) that I hadn't seen in a while, and after catching up, I found out that not only did Maddie not know that Taylor and I had dated, but that Taylor and this other guy (Nate) have been dating for a while. So basically, I was the other guy. Taylor had been telling all the friends she had between herself and Nate that they were dating. In our circle of friends, we were dating. There wasn't any crossover of friend groups so that's how it lasted for six months. It was coincidence that Maddie was friends with both me and Taylor's friends. But now I realize that Nate has no idea that she cheated on him with me for six months. According to Maddie, he probably knows about me as just a friend of hers. Should I tell him what's been going on? I'm not out to ruin her life because that's not the type of dude I am, but the time I spent thinking that I had been cheated on was the worst feeling I've ever felt, and I don't want to leave Nate in this situation if she's two-timing him. TL;DR:

r/askwomenadvice TITLE: i'm afraid of approaching guys because I worry I'll mess up and ruin any change I may have had. Is there a technique to approaching guys? POST: Im a 19 year old female. I've come to realize that I don't approach guys not because I'm simply afraid of approaching them, but because I'm afraid of approaching them incorrectly. I worry that I'll make a mistake and make the guy uninterested or frankly run away in fear, and that ultimately things would've gone differently if I'd approached it another way. Take for example this guy I like. I can't tell if he likes me back. I can't tell if he talks to me because he's being friendly, or if it's because he has mutual feelings for me. I want to find out, but I'm afraid I'll "execute the wrong technique". Right now I feel like changing my seat in class and taking one closer to his and seeing what his reaction is, but I'm afraid this is the wrong thing to do. Mostly, I worry I will begin to annoy him and any feelings he might have had for me will dwindle away. And it's not just with this guy. feel this way about any guy I like at the moment. Am I being ridiculous? TL;DR:

r/AskReddit TITLE: My wife was injured at work and signed a waiver...Anybody know a good lawyer? POST: Hi Reddit. This is our last-ditch effort before giving up and settling with my wife's employer due to an injury that occurred almost 2 years ago. She is (was) an ICU nurse at a large hospital in Texas. Her injury is a cervical radiculopathy that occurred when a patient (who later died) whacked her in the head while she was assisting in turning the patient. The employer is self-insured, so worker's compensation laws don't really seem to apply here. At the time of the injury, they gave her 10 days to review and sign an agreement to hold harmless. The agreement was that they would provide all necessary care so long as we didn't sue them. We signed that waiver, worried that she wouldn't get necessary treatment. Unfortunately, there were several delays that they caused in treating her that we believe made her injury worse. They treated her with some sort of steroid injections, but that was months after the injury. As time went on and the injury didn't heal, they had her do several things such as maximum medical improvement exercises that we feel could have worsened the injury. We have spoken to several attorneys and none will take the case since the waiver has never been successfully "penetrated". As a part of a final settlement, they want her to sign an additional agreement to never sue. One lawyer told us that we should be happy to accept any settlement at this point since we signed the first waiver. Here is a key takeway for anyone who ever confronts this situation: **do not sign anything** until after you have had a lawyer review it. Even if they threaten termination, let them fire you and lawyer up! Has anybody ever experienced anything similar? TL;DR:

r/AskReddit TITLE: What is the most awkward bathroom experience you've ever encountered? POST: I was taking my usual poop in a public restroom, and then all of a sudden some guy peeks through the side view and looks directly at me. I tried to avoid eye contact, but he kept on staring me down. Feeling awkward as ever, I finally feel relieved when he decides to leave. Literally 30 seconds pass, and the guy comes back and stares me down with another guy. At this point, I started to feel violated, so I finish my shit to see what's up. As I step out of the stall, I see the same two men staring at me as if they've see a ghost - but get this, one of them is a police officer... I completely ignored the situation and washed my hands and left. To this day, I still have no idea wtf that was. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: Me [26M] need help deciding if my engagement to my fiance [27F] is over or I should fight for it POST: Let me preface this by saying that we are Indian...which makes the gravity of breaking it off worse (culturally once you are engaged or married there's no such thing as divorce) I met my fiance a year ago through a friend and we got off to a really fast start...she said she loved me within 3 dates and we were both looking for marriage so we kind of went at light speed. We got engaged about 11 months after we started dating (big engagement party) we are now 13 months in. Throughout our relationship I was scared and we fought a lot..advice that was given to me was that this happens...but we fought a lot over stupid things and fundamental things. She's a very blunt very spoiled person and she doesn't realize that. She's manly in how she carries herself (not touchy feely and swears when she talks, is generally rude and uses slang more then I do) she complains that I am sensitive and condescending sometimes...which I can be. And that she's never been with someone as emotional and who talks about feelings as much as me. Over the last while we both started to resent each other and our fights have been increasingly worse. We also both have big egos and don't back down. My sexual performance is always affected because she never wants foreplay.....just to have sex and she's really insensitive about it and so Ive had issues maintaining an erection during sex which has caused even more problems. 2 weeks ago we had a huge fight were at our lowest points and decided we should go to therapy...the next day I was talking to her and in regular conversation she brought up two things I said in a previous fight...taking Jabs at me. We were in such a weak state that I was amazed at how she could do this. This escalated into a fight because she denied what she was doing and then we finally just called off our wedding. I talked to her recently trying to mend things but she had a whole bunch of complaints and said I bitch and moan too much. In short...I'm asking if I should Conciede and try and work things out or are we just not meant for each other. TL;DR:

r/personalfinance TITLE: How do I get my roommates to pay their bills? POST: Okay, so I'm a relatively nice guy. I have a decent job and think that I do pretty well for myself, but I always find myself having to pay a much larger share of the utility bills that any of my roommates. Now, I like my roommates, and we are really good friends. But last month I had to pay $320 in bills for electric, water, and gas. I share the place with three other people so the total cost should be $80 per person. So far, I have only received $40 from one roommate. It was either pay the bills myself or go without water or electricity for two weeks. They say they will pay me back, but this has happened before and I never REALLY get the full share from anyone. Everyone pays their fair share of rent, but when it comes to bills this problem continues to happen again and again. I feel like I'm being taken advantage of, and my "friends" seem to be taking my kindness for weakness. TL;DR:

r/Advice TITLE: What cities in the US are the best for someone like me to move to? POST: I am a 23 year old male. I think I'd prefer cities in cali, but I'm open to anything in the US. I work remotely. I make decent/good money with my job, I don't spend much, and I am ok with living in super cheap apartments. So, I believe most anywhere in the US is an option. My main priority is to meet open minded, unique people (especially girls since I am single). Anyhow, Here is a list of what I want in a place that I live, ranked by priority! 1)I like warm weather (around 77 degrees, can be between 60-95 degrees though) 2)I want to be near some college campuses AND beaches. (good way to meet girls in my age range). 3) I want the city to be pretty liberal as I am pretty far left on the political spectrum, both on economic and social issues. Basically, as long as there are open minded, chill girls and the city is overall pretty liberal minded, I should be good. 4)I typically like girls (and people in general haha) that aren't too materialistic, not dramatic, liberal, and chill. Cities that I am considering so far (will add to this list as suggestions come): San Luis Obispo, California, Santa Cruz, California, Miami, Florida, San Fransisco, California, San Diego, California Anyhow, based on my 4 numbered requirements above, let me know what area/city in the US you think I should live!! As you can tell, I think somewhere in cali may be nice, but I am open to anything. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: I [20M] am unsure how to go to the next step in relationship with best friend [20F] POST: I'll try to make this as short as possible. This girl and I have been friends since way back at the beginning of middle school. We stayed close friends all the way through high school and after graduation, even when I moved to a different school a half hour away. We've both dated multiple different people during this time and were each other's rebounds for a bit when had separate break ups around the same time. We both know we are physically attracted to one another. Why we aren't in some sort of romantic relationship escapes me, but I have a feeling we both may be afraid to lose our close friendship. We talk to each other almost every day, all day, and try to hang out with each other as much as possible. In fact, we are going to an amusement park this weekend together for their "Halloween themed fright nights". I've thought about just laying it all out on the table to her around then, but that fear is still in the back of my mind. I'm sure everything will probably be fine between us if she doesn't want to go much farther than friends seeing how close we are. Still though, this situation is not one I'm familiar with. I definitely don't want to do this through texting or on the phone, where we usually talk. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: Both [M19] How to confront a boyfriend about "cheating"? POST: So I've had suspicions he was hiding something from me, he received texts from an unsaved number and ignored me when I asked who they were from. Finally, he's out of the room and left his phone, sure enough there are 2 different guys that have been texting him back and forth, one sending dick pics that my boyfriend responds positively to. The other I already knew about and told him to stop texting him, because it bothered me (kid is only 16, boyfriend and I are 19). We are both males, living in the same house, same apartment for college, and I'm at his house for Christmas. How do I handle this? Do I confront him and ultimately admit to looking through his text messages? Please ask for any details that need clearing up. TL;DR:

r/relationship_advice TITLE: How possible is it that he doesn't want me anymore because of my looks? POST: So I was talking to this guy online. We've known each other for a few months and we got along great. We even made plans on meeting. I really wanted to make it come true and real, but the distance and money were an issue. I still did believe in "that it'll work out some day" At some point drama got involved and he stopped giving me compliments. We deleted each other and blocked each other around 2-3 times on facebook. It has been me twice and him as well, we were frustrating each other. I still feel like, what if I was prettier, would he have put up with the drama? I do understand that he didn't want drama - he said his buddies have the same troubles with girls OFFLINE and he feels sorry for them, and he has the same issues with someone he hasn't even met yet. I do get a lot of compliments and such but he says he's a picky guy and .... I mean, of course he has told me I look really pretty but he hasn't said that ever since after 1-2 weeks talking. He complimented my body, just thinking about how it could be my appearance hurts ... How real is this idea? I think it's be easier for me to get over the fact that he told me he doesn't wanna communicate with me anymore (in fact he said I was mean-hearted and so on) ... I know I did say a few things and acted bad out of my insecurities - I wanna get over it but these thoughts are desperately killing me I know some ppl will think "oh it's just an online person", but he was more than that to me. He has seen pics and videos TL;DR:

r/loseit TITLE: Transitioning from Weight Watchers to MyFitnessPal POST: I've been doing Weight Watchers for the last year and finally ended my subscription this week. With the lenient weekly points and unlimited fruits and vegetables, I wasn't progressing and decided it was time for a change. I set up an account on myfitnesspal, but I'm having trouble with the transition. On WW I was eating a disproportionate amount of fruit and veggies to stay full, but on myfitnesspal this sends me way above the carb limit that the site provides. It's been a lot more difficult to stay within the calorie limit on myfitnesspal than it is to stay within the WW points limit. So, what's a good way to balance what I'm eating in order to stay full longer? I've seen a lot about carb/protein/fat daily percentages, but am not sure what to make of it. TL;DR:

r/Advice TITLE: Did anyone here have a reckless stay at home mom? How have you coped? POST: I [23F] enjoyed that my mom [44] was able to care for me so much, but now that I have graduated from college and began working, I see how irresponsible my mom has been financially. I am curious if anyone else has witnessed similar in their stay at home mom. During her marriage (now divorced) my family ascended to upper middle class, so she had plenty of funds for designer clothes, five store hotels, and premium groceries. This became the norm for her, though she never worked other than as a kid. Since the divorce over five years ago, she ran out of funds and could no longer pay rent or even maintain her psychological well being. She had to go to the ER a few times for passing out because she wasn't eating, and was depressed. Now she's on multiple meds. Without going too much in detail, she was not able to care for herself, so a nonprofit accepted her into their program. They provide shelter and basic care for the homeless so they can turn their lives around. She's been there a few months and isn't doing too much better in my eyes. Though she has no degree or real skills, she still thinks that after her program she'll be able to buy $50 shampoo and that she'll be able to afford renting beach front property in SoCal. To be clear, she thinks she'll be able to do this on her own without a man, and she plans to get her 4 year degree after the program too (she does has a benefit to cover tuition at a state school). Last I visited her, I took her to lunch at Whole Foods and when I went away to the restroom, she came back to me with a basket of $200 worth of beauty products for me to buy her, which we hadn't agreed to. Her program provides her everything she needs though, though they're generic. She said she deserves nice things though because she does hard work in her program (cafe cook M-F), and that she expects me to help her now. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: I [19 M] am having confidence about the quality of my friendship with my best friend[17 M] POST: I'll be brief about this. I have never really had a ~~best~~ friend and to be honest, I feel like now that I have one I am bound to fuck it up. I try to be my best to everyone,because that's how I am. But then I make jokes and comments that get inside my own head. Even though he laughs. Our sense of humor is well...edgy. And as such it's hard to know where the line is. My point is,and I am trying to get to the point without getting to my past. But, well..in the moment I have all the confidence in the world. But when I sit by myself and think sometimes I get to myself and think that I will,fuck it up,I mean the more I write the more I think I'm being stupid. TL;DR:

r/tifu TITLE: TIFU by sliding down a pole at a trampoline park POST: Yesterday, I f'd up. I was at a place called Jump in the North Shore of Auckland with my good friend as it was his last day here in New Zealand. My Father had chosen for a "Ninja warrior" styled course in the booking, and that was pretty nice of him to do. However, here's my FU. There is a fireman's pole which you can slide down on the top of the ninja thingy, and I decided to go down it, because none of the other children there wanted to do it. (Height restriction for this part of the park is 150cm. I'm 155.) So I was like hey, gotta show these spegs how it's done. So I went down, however, it the pole was very far away from my reach, so I just barely grabbed on to it, but then I went down without warning and without my legs being able to grab on to the pole. So I ended up at the bottom screaming for help, not being able to move, and now I'm in the hospital with two fractured bones in my spine. I'm about 13 and a half and this is a pain that I should not ever have had to feel, but hey, I learnt to never go down a pole ever again. TL;DR:

r/tifu TITLE: TIFU by accidentally plagiarizing myself. POST: This is my first ever Reddit worthy fuck up, so bear with me guys! I'm a sophomore at one of the top journalism schools in the US. I'm also in an honors program, so my classes can be pretty tough. This semester I'm in an honors Journalism Law class, and our midterm project was a 35 page research paper. Now last year, I did a research paper on FCC regulations and censorship, but on a much smaller scale (only 5 pages.) Since this first paper sparked an interest in the topic, I decided to expand upon my previous research in my second paper. I actually had planned to look at my previous paper when I first decided to do it, but I broke my laptop a few months ago and lost all my documents. So I had to sort of start over from a research/writing standpoint. I turned in my paper a few days ago, feeling pretty good about it. Today, my professor emailed me that I need to meet with him and the dean of the J-school for a plagiarism hearing. I basically had a mini heart attack, and I had no idea why they would think I had plagiarized, since all my writing was original to my knowledge. Those of you not currently in college may not know that most professors enter papers into a program that logs and checks for plagiarism or sentences/paragraphs that are repeated in multiple assignments. My paper from last year had been entered into this program, and my current professor had entered my new paper into the same program. It turns out that despite not even looking at my old paper, I did the same research and somehow concocted some of the EXACT SAME SENTENCES as my first paper, therefore accidentally plagiarizing myself. I explained my situation to my teacher via email, and since it was my own work that was accidentally plagiarized (although I don't think they believe it was accidental) they're probably going to make an exception to the automatic expulsion policy for plagiarism. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: My [18 F] friend [20 M] just got kicked out of his house. How do I help him? POST: My best friend, Theo was just kicked out of his house for being gay. Theo has been out in the friend group for years, but he's never told his family because he was afraid of how his dad would react. One of his classmates from highschool did not know it was a secret, mentioned it to her mom, which got back to the Theo's dad. Long story short, his dad kicked him out, and he was only able to grab his phone and his wallet. He came over to my house, and he is currently staying here with me and my mom in one of the spare rooms. The trouble is, I don't know exactly how to help him! Theo's mom and sister are trying to convince his dad to let him come back to the house, but I don't know how safe his home would be for him? I don't know if I should encourage him to stay at our house until it's time for him to go back to college, or if I should stay out of it entirely. If he does come live with us for now, what needs to be done? I've already told him that he should get his important documents from his mom to do stuff like get his drivers permit and make sure his father is not able to access his bank account, but I am sure there is so much I am forgetting. My mom wants to stay out this situation entirely, and not get involved. My father was physically abusive to her and my older sister, and none of them like to talk about that time. I remember bits and pieces of how scared they where when I was younger, but I didn't experience it like they did. I don't think my mom wants to deny a safe home to someone who is in that situation, but she is also afraid of getting into a situation like this again, I am afraid of bringing up bad memories by asking her for advice, which is why I turned to reddit. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: Me [early 20s F] with my (ex?) SO [late 20s M] of 3 and 1/2 years, I thought he was going to propose. He dumped me. How do you move on from someone you thought you would marry? POST: I feel stupid now. He told me around 6 months ago he intended to propose in the next year. He had been pressing a bit for sex- knowing my religious views made me want to wait. Eventually I gave in. I love sex. Never thought I wouldn't. I already knew I had a pretty large sex drive. But now I don't really know what to do. I feel kinda tricked. He knew I would never have sex unless I was married/was 100% sure I was getting married. Which I thought I was. I don't feel to bad. A little sick and dirty. I mean sex is a part of life. The only thing I worry about is not being able to find a man who will marry me now. How do I get over it? TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: I [25/m] developed feelings for a friend [19/f] but never had a real date before, could some need help.. POST: So, I literally never had something like a date before. Every previous relationship just happened (for example slept regularly in the same bed after a night out with friends and ended up kissing one morning, or got in touch online and were basically in a relationship before we really met the first time). This situation is different. I met this beautiful girl (I'll call her Tina) at a birthday party of another friend and we hang out a lot since that point. But never alone as she always (literally) hangs out with her best (female) friend (I'll call her Kathy). Some time ago now we three (remember her best friend lol) went to watch a horror movie and I had to sit in the middle so both got a hand to clinch on. As Tina took my hand, oh my, I lost my heart to her. And that's were my problems begin. I have literally no idea how/where to start. I'm a very introverted and insecure guy. I won't have any chances to somehow meet her without company any soon BUT there is new years eve coming up that we all planned to be together (Kathy + her bf, Tina and myself) and I guess that might be my best bet to somehow open up to her. She herself seems to be somewhat insecure herself as Kathy said that Tina had no luck with guys in the past years, but she's way more extroverted than I am (one thing that I like despite me being introverted) What would your advice be for a insecure, introverted guy to open up to a girl at new years eve? TL;DR:

r/college TITLE: Who do I contact to see if an in state tuition exception could be made? POST: I know, the hubris. But really my case is a bit different (I'm sure everyone thinks that but it's unique from what I've seen and who I've talked to). I want to see if my university will let me pay in state tuition instead of international tuition. I've already done my first two years here and paid in state fees because my immigrant status allowed me to do so. That will change soon and according to the policies that my college has in place right now, I will no longer qualify for in state tuition. I think I should qualify for in state tuition because I've been living for well over a decade and the only reason I'm being screwed over is because of the immigration process. There are other reasons too but I can explain these in the email. **I am already expecting a no but it's worth a try anyway.** Who do I email? I'm thinking the Dean but I'm not too sure. Would the office of the registrar also be a good choice? Who would have the most influence over something like this? Do I email just one person or should I reach out to multiple people? TL;DR:

r/tifu TITLE: TIFU drinking chocolate milk with my girlfriend as someone who is a bit lactose intolerant POST: So this happened like half a year ago, around 1 month after we started dating. I invited her over to my place for a movie night and she brought over some chocolate milk her mum sent her. Well the problem is chocolate milk in general makes me fart like an idiot and I kinda forgot about. 3 chocolate milk glasses and 2 movies later I fel asleep with a huge urge to fart but thankfully, I resisted it. 8 hours later, I woke up and she's on the couch. "Good morning love, why are you on the couch?" - You know why I'm on the couch! I have no idea what happened so I try to discover what I did wrong. "But what happened, baby?" -You don't remember?! I kinda start to get a bit mad. "What did I do?!" -Well you kept farting and laughing like an idiot so I was like WTF and went on the couch. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: Me [21 F] with my boyfriend [23 M] of 2 years, I can't trust him but I'm afraid to leave him? POST: Ive been with this dude for over 2 years, a little on and off, due to a time where I caught him cheating, and due to other times Ive caught him "hanging" out with other girls but didn't have enough evidence to catch him cheating so I believed whatever excuse he gave me. I can't for the life of me get past the idea that he might cheat again or that his wandering eye will make him do anything disloyal in the future, but I've forgiven him for anything he's done in the past and we are still together. but I can't sleep at night without checking the social media of the girl he cheated on me with (over a year and a half ago) and another girl he was "friends" with. And whenever I bring up any of the past, he gets angry. and I understand that I shouldn't keep bringing up things I've supposedly forgiven him for, but it kills me, especially because I've been a great girlfriend to him and these girls im worried about are honestly ho*s (not even saying this to make myself feel better). but I'm afraid to leave him because every time we've been temporarily broken up I feel lonely and it doesn't get better. our longest break up was 3 months and I was crying everyday. I know I should find someone else but I have a strong feeling im never going to feel this way about someone else again. Should I try to regain trust or just end it? TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: My sex drive is at 110% but towards her more like 20% POST: **A Bit of background** I am a 23 years old guy, she is 24 and we have been a couple for around 5 years - 4 living together. We are both athletic, in shape and nice looking (at least I consider her to be). We have already graduated from university in our respective careers and are just starting our professional career paths. . **How I feel about her in terms of the Relationship** My god I love her, she is just perfect. I cannot picture anyone else being the mother of my children and a person with whom I will happily spend my future life. She is nurturing, great looking, smart, supporting, etc. All in all great, *except for the sex, our should I say; my sexual attraction towards her* . **The Worry/Situation** She thinks am like a sex camel (because of my lack in desire for sex), when thats not the case... I very much want to do it, if possible every day - every where, and I wish it could be with her, but no, Im just not really turned on by her as often or as aroused as I would like. Now dont get me wrong, she is fantastic in bed, giving 100% every time, the problem is me, I want to have sex but with other people... I know how terrible this sounds, but am not pleased with my thoughts either (*I have never cheated*). I guess it could be bluntly described as, I rather masturbate (which is what happens) and therefore I kind of fall within this cycle that makes me lose desire for her. Sometimes even months, I will say our average is once a month, at times 2 months. I guess I feel like crap because I really like her, and I really want to enjoy her, but am more focused at the sex that am missing out on that on the great on that I could have with her. So I dont know wether this is a temporary situation/obsession with other woman, or wether our sex life is fucked *(no pun intended)* because of me. I would love to hear your opinions, advice, similar experiences, it will mean the world to me. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: Me [15 M] with my cousin [15 F], my cousin lives pretty far away and I would actually like to build a relationship with her but have no idea how POST: My cousin lives pretty far away from me and we have only seen each other 10 times at the most throughout our entire lives. I am a pretty shy guy and I wanted to try to build an actual relationship with her because she is just about the only person in my family anywhere near my age. I just have no idea how to go about doing it. Like I have no idea how to not make just randomly talking to her out of the blue awkward or just how to start talking to her. Also the last time I saw her about a year ago, I think I kind of acted like a huge jerk to her so that probably didn't help our almost nonexistent relationship. I'm hoping that she didn't notice or forgot or is just going to ignore it. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: Me [24M] with my ex [23F] of 4 months. Totally used me and hung me out to dry. POST: Basically, my ex and I broke up mid-April, a lot of it was my fault. I'm atheist, she's "christian", I drank way too much, and she was just not happy with the way things were going. I tried to get her to let me change and stay together, but it just wasn't going to happen. What happened: After the breakup, we stayed on good terms but didn't talk much. After a while we started chatting and eventually went out to dinner. She offered to come over after dinner to hang out and it turned into hanging out and having sex. This happened again the very next night. I told her the first night that I still liked her and she gave an answer that basically said that she was worried that would happen, but that was all she really said about it. The morning after the second night, she texted me and told me that she was going to "cut me loose" and that hanging out with me made her feel even more "broken". I, confused as hell, asked her why she even came over to begin with. Her answer tore me apart. Quoting what6 she said with a few mistypes because of memory errors, she said "I wanted to come over and for us to have great sex. I wanted you to give it to me until pain and pleasure were unanimous and I begged you to stop and you wouldn't. And then I wanted to put on my clothes and leave without saying much. I wish I had told you about my plan before I did it though." She completely cut me off, blocked FB, etc...My biggest issue besides realizing that I got played for a fool intentionally, is the fact that even though I cut my drinking back to almost nothing, and worked on myself and my issues, that I still was just a joke in her eyes. Not worth giving a second chance and not even worth receiving any respect, especially since she knew that I HATE flings. Just getting broken up with for having issues and then left again after I fixed those issues really makes me hurt bad. Especially since I know that she's still dating. Any insight would be helpful. I know this is stupid, ask questions if you have them if this clusterfuck wasn't very clear. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: How long do you date someone before transitioning into an exclusive "relationship"? POST: Ok, I'm a college sophomore (guy) and while I had several long-ish (2 months to a year) relationships in high school, I've only been casually dating since my arrival at college. Two weeks ago I went on a date with one girl that was absolutely amazing and since then we've either gone on a date or did something just the two of us 8 times. I'm really into this girl and from what I can tell she is very into me so I was thinking about taking things to the next level and asking her to "officially" be my girlfriend. I ran this by a couple friends citing the ~3 weeks I dated all of my previous girlfriends before asking them out and I received a wide variety of responses. Some of my friends said 3 weeks is WAY to early and I shouldn't even think about this until 2-3 months (!?) in. I know I need to talk to her about what she wants, if she even wants a relationship, but I'm also not really sure how to bring that up, so a little help with that too would be great. TL;DR:

r/AskReddit TITLE: How can I control my sex drive?? (female) POST: I'm a 21 year old female and my sex drive is out of control. Yeah, yeah, "what are you talking about, that's great, let's meet" whatever. It's a considerable problem. I want sex ALL the time. I mean, from the moment I wake up until I fall asleep. I'm in a relationship, and it's absolutely wonderful. We have fantastic sex most times we're together; probably about 3 or 4 times a week. But if I had it my way, we would have sex every day, multiple times a day. Just being around him turns me on, and if I get aroused but don't climax, I get lady-blueballs in the worst way and get a horrible stomachache. So, if he's tired at the end of the day and wants to go to bed without having sex, I need to masturbate. He says this doesn't bother him, but I feel like I'm hurting his feelings by doing this. I don't want to damage his pride. I feel like he feels he's not satisfying me physically, which is actually true, but I'm very aware that my "demands" are completely unreasonable. He's felt pressured by girlfriends in the past and it has caused him significant pain. I never want him to feel that way with me, but I also can't deny myself my physical needs. On days we don't see each other I normally masturbate twice a day. I think about sex constantly and it interferes with my daily life. I can get all keyed up and anxious if I become aroused by even a passing sexual thought. I have even had to "go to the bathroom" at work to give myself a quick orgasm. I need to find a way to focus my sexual energy onto something else. I don't want to feel on edge all the time, and, more importantly, I don't want to hurt my SO or make him feel at all inadequate. I have the best sex of my life with him, he gives me multiple orgasms every time, and he is a very generous lover...I want him to feel that he is enough. TL;DR:

r/tifu TITLE: TIFU by living in an old house and being hungry at 3:00am POST: This happened roughly 20 minutes ago. So as anybody who lives in the Lawton Oklahoma area will know We have had a bit of flooding the past few days, and because of that flooding my uncle his wife and the five kids they have are staying with me for a while. Now my house was built in in the 1940s it is not in the best conditions especially the floor very squeaky. earlier this night I had already woken up the 3 month old baby because of these floor. It took his parents an hour do get him back to sleep it was around 1:00am. So two hours later I get a bit hungry, and when you get hungry at 3:00am you probably don't want to cook. I hop over the squeaky bit of the floor. I grab a piece of day old pizza from the fridge, and put it in the microwave for 1 minute. I walk back to my room to grab my phone, and I hear it "CREEE!" the baby is still asleep thank god. I know when I lift my foot it will squeak again. It's like a land mine, but I forget the loaded rifle pointed at my back The Microwave. That beep will wake up that baby, it can and will be heard through the entire house. I look over my shoulder to look at the timer on the microwave. I have 23 seconds to get out of this situation. I tried to do the whole weight transfer thing with a chair. As it turns out a chair doesn't weigh 212 pounds. The floor squeaked and the timer went off. I'm not sure what woke up the baby. But now there is a screaming baby in the other room. TL;DR:

r/relationship_advice TITLE: Did I try to move too fast, too soon with a guy I've been dating? POST: Hey Reddit, [throwaway account] First/Background: me [25]F, him [26]M. Length: about 2 months We met through a co-ed sports league, about 3-4 months ago. Flirting began, and about 2 months ago we first kissed. We kept it slow until about a month ago, where, we went from seeing each other 1-2 times a week, to about... 5-6 days a week. The past month he has stayed at my place about 3-4 times per week, and goes to work from there in the morning. We still play sports together, and we've been going to a lot of concerts together, or just hanging out. And things seem to be going amazing. We've spent a lot of time together, and he still seems interested. until today I feel a bit confused. I asked if he was planning on staying over tonight, and he said that it was "yet to be determined, i think i have a shirt in my car" to which i responded "You know, you are welcome to leave a shirt/ a few necessities at my place if you want, instead of lugging everything in and out, just an option." His response was not quite what I was expecting. "That's sweet. I feel more like a rockstar this way, always on the go... aka a sold out show in [area where i live]" I'm not sure if he was trying to be nice in shutting me down, was trying to be funny, or. what? Basically, for the men of reddit, [and/or ladies] - did I go a bit to fast in asking if he wanted to leave some items? I wasn't trying to insinuate anything crazy. We haven't had the discussion if either of us are dating/hooking up with anyone else, but with the time we spend together, it would be hard to assume he has the time. That, and we pretty much act like a couple around everyone. I feel like maybe I might be over thinking this as well.... TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: [24/F] feel uncomfortable with my boyfriend's [27/M] friendship with [26/F]. POST: We've been together for a year. This girl is someone he met playing WoW. He swears up and down that there are no feelings there at all, but they talk quite a bit 1 on 1 on Skype, he told me he thinks she's cute and they plan to meet later this year and 'get fucked up.' No invite for me, and I didn't ask either. Our relationship is generally very good.. active sex life, very little fights, lots of things in common, both of us are at least moderately attractive and take care of ourselves, money included. What would you do if you were in my position? Am I being irrational or overthinking things? What would you do if your boyfriend met someone on the internet, said she was really cute and couldn't wait to meet her/get drunk with her and didn't invite you? Thanks in advance. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: How do I [20/M] know if I'm just going through the depression stage of the grieving process, or if I truly miss my ex-girlfriend? POST: I've been feeling intensely nostalgic and depressed over my ex-girlfriend [19/F] for the past month or so. We broke up nearly 5 months ago after she started college and said she doesn't have the time for a boyfriend, even though she's now dating another guy **and** even though we attend the same university. For the first 3 months after the breakup, I was manically depressed, struggled in school, and hated her, going so far as to cursing her to hell whenever people would ask about us two. For about another month I sort of forgot about her and focused solely on school. Now, going on 5 months since the breakup, I'm feeling shitty yet again as though I'm back at square one. Is there any way of knowing whether I'm just going through the grieving process, or if I'm truly longing for and missing her? I don't want to waste any more time or dwell on this any further. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: 19M How to gain confidence without coming off as creepy? POST: I've never been that confident around girls. However the other night I was at a concert and I was having a good time and it started getting hot so I rolled up my sleeves. (I work out on a regular basis so I'd say I'm somewhat fit) anyway I'm all dancing and I feel a girl behind squeeze my arm right after I rolled up my sleeves and I was flattered so I turn around and she points to her friend they are both pretty cute. But I just laughed it off and squeezed her arm too however I didn't know how to take it from there I was scared of doing something back that would make it seem creepy what should have I done? TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: Need help with age gap and extra. POST: I'm a 26 (M) year old retail manager, I'm interested asking out a 19 (F) year old employee of the location I work at. I haven't addressed this with her yet because I want to make sure I have my head straight before I make a move. One issue is the age gap. I know how corny this sounds but I never would have guessed she was 19 based on how mature and professional she is. I'd honestly be a bit embarrassed if my male and female friends found out I was dating a 19 year old as someone who's 26. Second is the work issue. This isn't that big of an issue since we work completely different shifts. Dating between co-workers is allowed. However I am her superior and 7 years older than her. I'm not sure how other staff would react if they eventually found out as well. TL;DR:

r/dating_advice TITLE: When is a good time to start talking to someone after a sort of date [17M/17F] POST: Last week, a girl asked me to go to the mall with her and her friend...so I did figured why not. We went yesterday, and it went pretty well we have quite a lot in common. Even still it wasn't actually a date I guess, more just a what "hang out" since her friend tagged along right? So I guess the next step would be doing something just us two? When would be a good time to start talking to her more and going out to do something else? I don't want to be too pushy, only being a day after...at least I feel like. I don't have any classes with her, she asked me through her friend who is in practically all my classes...and then after that we just talked on Facebook. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: Tips for [28 F] on how to let go of a friendship with my [31 M] friend [Non-Romantic, friends/colleagues] POST: A friend of mine recently decided he didn't want to be friends with me unless there was the possibility of something romantic. In the long run, this is a good thing because he's manipulative and rarely treated me well in the first place. However, we still need to work together, which means I'm around him and sometimes needing to interact with him. I realize this may not require the same approach as a breakup of a romantic relationship, but we were really close at one point, so it still sucks. We've known each other for 5 years. I miss talking to him, sharing with him, hanging out with him... even if he was a jerk oftentimes. So I ask for any advice from people who have "broken up" with a friend, or who have separated from a romantic relationship. How were you able to be around someone you once cared about when your current relationship with them is basically non-existent? TL;DR:

r/dating_advice TITLE: 19f. I realized I'm interested in a guy who is probably not going to make the first move. POST: We are both in our second year of college and have 3 classes together. I see him every day. Recently I've realized that we click and we've now hung out 3 times (in a small group). Once the alcohol gets flowing I definitely get a little flirty, but probably not even enough to notice. I've just never been good at that, it doesn't come naturally to me. So seeing as it would be awkward if I made a move and got rejected since we see eachother every day and it can't be avoided, what can I do to gauge if he's interested? How can I show more interest? I'm really new at this. I've only had a few guys ever express their interest in me and I fucked up those relationships before it even became anything because of some pretty bad social anxiety. I saw a therapist for it and I'm doing a little better with that and I finally feel like I'm ready to move onto dating. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: Me [26 F] with my ex [26 M] 6 months together, 2 months apart. Ex bought us tickets post-breakup for a very meaningful (to me) show. I'm confused. POST: Hey guys! Need some advice! My ex and I broke up around 2 months ago because he was having doubts about our connection/not feeling "in love." We were about to be apart for 2 months with him traveling all of March and me away most of April. Besides for him not having strong feelings, we had a really good relationship and he admitted during the break up that he wasn't completely sure he was making the right decision but felt too guilty keeping me in a relationship for 8 months without knowing for sure how he felt. He really wanted to stay friends and talked a bit about how we might still have potential. A month ago, at the very end of March, when he returned to our city and shortly before I left for my trip, I told him that I still had feelings for him and wanted to work things out. He turned me down telling me that he wanted to date around, had kind of met someone and kissed her, and was starting to feel reluctant to be friends as I still had lingering feelings and it might be too complicated. During my trip we continued to email sporadically and he liked a lot of my pictures on Facebook. I got back to our city on Monday night and on Tuesday morning he asks to meet up this weekend to catch up. I agree and today we met for coffee. We caught up for an hour laughing and having a good time. Then he tells me that 3 weeks ago he got an email that my favorite band was coming to town and immediately bought us tickets to go. He knows this band is really meaningful to me. The show is on Wednesday night. Reddit, I still have feelings for this guy. I want to get back together. But I no longer have any idea where we stand. Is there a chance? Does he want to be friends? Who buys concert tickets to something very meaningful for their ex? I already threw myself at him and got shut down a month ago. What now? TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: I [20F] found porn depicting SO's [25 M] ex, been together for 2 years. How should I feel? POST: Using a throwaway because I don't know if and how i should approach it yet. A couple of weeks ago I was using his PC and whilst looking for a website a link to a porn site appeared. Obviously i'm under no illusion that he doesn't watch porn or anything like that. I'm totally cool with it. I just couldn't help myself though, and searched his history to see what kind of things he's been watching lately (I like to think we're very open about our sexuality but even so, I thought maybe I could surprise him with something he's maybe been thinking about, and i was CURIOUS) I know it' so so so wrong, and I insta-regretted it. It was a bad move on my part, i know. What I found made me feel a bit sick... Searches for porn stars that look like his ex ( they were together for longer than me and him), or more precisely his ex's race. Not just one search, but a lot for black, mixed race, brown :( I am definitely not any of those, and I think maybe I just don't have what he really needs... He says I give him things no one has before, and that he's happier than he has ever been with anyone. It's just hard to think right now... I have had absolute complete trust in him since i first said i loved him too. This has just made me doubt myself more than him though :/ Oh, i was so shocked i then searched his ex's name... and her fb came up quite a few times, although they're not actually friends on facebook as far as i'm aware.. what is happening? Just don't know how to feel about it, or if i should bring it up, and if so HOW. Am I wrong to be worried, or at least concerned? I am so sorry if i have missed anything, I'll try to answer any extra questions. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: I (f/19) have a serious issue with my boyfriend's (m/22) friends, who he's recently started hanging out with POST: My boyfriend and I have been best friends for seven years. We started getting serious about each other romantically a year and a half ago, and we've been officially dating 5 months. About a month after we started dating, he got a job as a host at a pizza place. Just recently, he's started going out every Monday night until 2 or 3 in the morning with the servers to bars and driving them all home once they're drunk. I HATE this. It worries me, for one, because I don't know if he's safe til he gets home, so I end up having to stay up late waiting to make sure. And worrying makes me feel physically ill. Second, I don't like what he's doing, the fact that he's at a bar, or the fact that he's hanging out with alcoholics. To me, that says a lot about his character, that I didn't see prior to now. I want a boyfriend I can be proud of in front of my family all the time. I can't as of now. I want someone who I think will be a good role model for future children. That's not him right now. I don't want to make him feel like I want control of his friends. He has some who I love dearly, but just not this group. I don't understand why these are the people he's choosing to spend his time with. He knew me first. He loved me first. He's got a whole other group of friends who are lovely people. I just don't know what to do. I can't say stop hanging out with them, but it bothers me so much I cant stand it. It really makes me question whether he's the guy I want to be with. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: I [F24] did a sexy strip tease for my partner [M23] but it wasn't as sexy as I hoped POST: Me and my boyfriend have been together three years and our sex life is good but starting to become a bit routine. I decided to add some zazzle with a sexy strip tease to get him going and shake things up a bit. So I got the lingerie, I picked the sexy playlist, I read tips and advice and I practiced practiced practiced. I'm not the most naturally sexy person and I have a lot of insecurities but I just told myself he loves me and he loves my body so I needed to go for it and forget about making myself vulnerable. Unfortunately despite my best efforts at sexiness I didn't get the lust feulled evening I had hoped for. I thought by the end of my tease he would be desperate to touch my body and please me. Instead he was more looking at me through out like I was being endearing and cute. when I was finally naked and straddling him I said "would you like to touch me now" he said "no". And asked me to go down on him. I did as he asked, which I always do because typically he takes control when we have sex (perhaps I should have refused and maintained the more dominant role?). We then had pretty regular sex and afterwards he thanked me and when I asked how he liked the dance, he said in a pretty non committal way that it was good. Help me reddit, it took a hell of a lot of balls for me to do this for him and now I just want to hide under a rock and never attempt to be sexy again. TL;DR:

r/tifu TITLE: TIFU because my girlfriend's vulgarity is rubbing off on me. POST: So a quick background: my girlfriend and I always tease eachother and say gross stuff like "I'll poop on your face" or "I'll pee in your ears" Anyway this TIFU happened today in class. Lecture was going on forever and I had to pee. So I turn to my classmate and tell her "hey I have to go pee, mind if I get by" she jokingly responds "no, you can't go pee" to which I respond "I'll pee in your mouth" ...well I immediately realize what I said and apologize but my professor saw and asked what was so important that I had to talk during his lecture...the girl says "professor, BullyWithABadge wants to pee in my mouth." TL;DR:

r/tifu TITLE: TIFU by touching dick on accident. POST: Hahahhahaa this happened a few years ago right after I graduated HS. Had a crush on a guy, and was talking to him about stuff. We were friends, worked part time together, but he was with an ex friend of mine, so meh. Pretty sure he thought I was a slut. I slapped his ass a lot in high school, but I did it to everyone, but yeah sexual harassment Anywho, we were in the cafeteria and he goes to leave. He's behind me, and I am still thinking he has his side towards me. I pat him, and tell him I'd see him later. I felt something harden under my touch, and him go "whoa". I realize I made a grave mistake, and he backs up. I try to laugh it off, but he just laughs, and books it outta there. Didn't talk to him much after that, but that's the story of how I touched my first dick, and gave a dude a hard on. TL;DR:

r/AskReddit TITLE: I'm jumping to conclusions about a text message I just received from my SO. Help. POST: Throwaway account for obvious reasons. Here is the situation: (I'll try and keep it short and to the point) My boyfriend went to a christmas party at his best friend's relative's house. His original plans were to go to the party, then drive to his cousin's house tonight because he has a flight really early in the morning (he's going on a mini-vacation with a few family members). We had been texting all day (as usual; I'm out of state visiting family for Christmas) and it kind of tapered off once he arrived at the xmas party (for good reason, who wants to be rude and text ya know?). At about 9pm the texts kinda stopped but I figured it was because he was either having fun chatting with people or driving to his cousins (about a half hour drive). I was busy with family stuff anyway. I asked him how things were going around 11pm and he responded at about 12:30am saying "I am the worst person ever." I, of course, replied asking him what was going on and if he was alright. He still hasn't responded and it has been (a very long) hour. I have called him twice and he hasn't picked up. I absolutely hate jumping to conclusions but my mind is going crazy and I honestly don't know what to do right now. I really hope he didn't get into an accident or do something worse. It's now 1:30am and his flight is at 6am. I can't sleep. Help me reddit. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: Me [20 M] breaking up with my girlfriend [19 F] of 2 years. Should I write a note to leave in case the breakup goes badly? POST: This is my first post in r/Relationships, so first off I apologise for any etiquette that I may have broken. I'm ending things with my girlfriend as I feel like I can't truly be myself when I'm with her and that we're going different ways in life; ultimately this relationship isn't going anywhere so I need to end it. I've never had to break up with someone before so I'm going to try and keep it short and make my reasons clear before leaving. I'm thinking about leaving a note to say that I'm sorry for things being this way and that she did mean a lot to me. I don't want this breakup to ruin her and I think the note might help her get through things, however I'm unsure if this would just be something that she may pine over and that it could make the break up worse for her? Once things are ended, obviously there won't really be any contact, and I don't want to end things negatively which cast a bad memory over our whole relationship. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: My (25m) girlfriend (22f) is saying she is depressed and needs time "alone." POST: I'm freaking out. Does this mean she wants to break up with me? I understand people can have severe depression for no attributable reason with it being difficult to explain, although she hasn't been akin to melancholy before. She doesn't take meds for it and she has stated that it has nothing to do with me, as well. Moving back this month, I was out of the country for a wedding for ten days. When I returned she surprised me with a cute romantic getaway in the mountains, which was fantastic. That was last Tuesday and Wednesday, and I haven't seen her since (we live in different cities). She claimed this weekend she was studying for her final. I suggested we should we should hang out one of the nights and she declined saying she was studying for her final on Monday (she takes one course, which I thought was fishy since she has been studying for weeks for this) and when I broached her to hang out for a bit tn after work, she cited her newfound depression. She said that she has no desire to hang out with anyone, watch anything, or do anything. Again, I can be understanding of depression, but wouldn't one want to see their boyfriend of 8 months more than twice in one month? Something tells me there's someone else. We lived close by one another for the first 3 months of our relationship, then I got a job 2 hours away. We plan on moving in together when I make enough at said job to move back (since I am already working in her area again and making the long commute). My mind is a cluster fuck right now, just need help clearing it up. So do I need to be more understanding of her alone time needs? Or is my status of freaking out valid? Thanks everyone. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: Me 26F and my BF 23M (2 years)- rocky start, now great but sexually uncomfortable POST: BACKGROUND: In the past 2 years we've been together, it was great at first, then rocky, then I hit a downward spiral of depression because he wanted to break up with me, then we broke up, I kind of got my life back on track, we got back together, and have been somewhat rocky up until recent. Now we are doing better than ever,. The sex was great at first, but when our relationship hit the wall, it became sad for me, because I knew he didn't want to be with me. And I would try new stuff and all that, and ever since we got back together I'm not really interested in it. I really want to be, but I get really sad when we start having sex because all I do is remember how I felt before and how hurt I was and that turns me off (the last time I started crying, which has never happened, he didn't notice) I really love him and have no intention of breaking things off and he loves me more than ever, I just need some advice on what to do here.. Do I talk to him about it or do I just start my own self-therapy and 'force' myself to enjoy it until I finally get comfortable again. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: Me [31F] with my boss(?) [55M] of 4 years; I broke his sander how do I make up for it? POST: This is not a typical r/relationships problem but I'd love some insight because I don't know what to do and don't want to damage this relationship. I bought my first house last year and I have been renovating it since. One of my superiors at work who is also a work friend (he visits me during the work day and we go for drinks occasionally but never hang out outside of work) lent me a few tools at various times. First it was a jumbo shop vac before I could afford my own, and then an ancient black and decker sander. Anyway, a couple weeks ago I break out the sander and within 5 minutes of reasonable use (sanding a flat stair surface) it sparks and lights on fire! It was fried so I had to rent one to finish the task. The next work day I told him what happened and he said "it's an old sander, it can be replaced. I'm glad nothing more serious happened". Then a few days later he made a joke about when I was going to buy him a new one. So here is my problem - is it reasonable for me to have to buy him a new sander when I was just unlucky enough to be the one using it when it bit the dust from old age? Brand new, the tool would cost about $70-$100 and the reason I borrowed it was because I couldn't afford to buy one new what with student loans still ruining my life. In addition, this guy makes about $300g a year and has taken multiple international vacations this year whereas I am scraping by with my expenses. I'm thinking about giving him the tool back with $20 or else seeing if I can find another super old sander on kijiji. Am I bring reasonable? I have no idea. Help! TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: [31/F] My Friend [39/M] keeps driving whilst drunk POST: One of my very close friends keeps drink driving. Every time he does it he just says: "Yes I Know" "Yes it's fine" "I don't mind" He is just so dismissive over the fact the he could kill someone, cripple them or just be pulled over; given a DUI and then he would lose his job. I'm so worried and scared that he is going to kill himself or someone else, this happens quite regularly he has also moved out of town now so the likeliness of him re-offending have greatly increased. I don't know what to do? How can I convince him to stop? TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: How likely/ difficult is it to stay in a relationship after both going separate ways after college? POST: After graduation, I'm [17F] leaving for college that is about 5 hours away. My boyfriend [18M] is staying here to get some classes done at a community college. Whenever the topic of anything slightly college related comes up he just gets upset and shuts me out because he's afraid of losing me. We've been together for about a year and I've never felt this connection with anyone else before, so a future together (after college) was something we've been thinking about. I'm probably going to be attending college for about 7-8 years because of my major. Has anyone had an experience like this and made it through? Or didn't? TL;DR:

r/relationship_advice TITLE: [27/f] Really confused about what to do about my ex who I'm still in love with [35/m] POST: It feels like a long story, but essentially - girl meets boy, falls in love, moves in. Except we got together originally a few months after I'd split up with a long term ex. The ex would still contact me occasionally, which caused issues with the new relationship, obviously. Things were really good and for the most part it was the easiest relationship I'd ever had - being around each other felt so simple and peaceful and everything just fit. Then last Fall, lots of things started to go wrong - my Grandfather died, my depression got bad again, he was stressed with work and my ex had started to hassle me again. There were lots of arguments, and he broke up with me a few times, convinced that I was still in love with my ex. After a few of these arguments, I left and told myself we needed a long stretch of time apart to get our heads straight. I told him that too. We didn't talk for a few months, and then we started hanging out again. We'd both been sleeping with others, but had discussed this and the problems with the relationship. We had talked about how to make it work again, and knew rushing back into anything wouldn't work. Even hanging out and being slightly coupley (still affectionate, etc) felt amazing, and I realised I'd really missed him. Then all of a sudden, last weekend, he tells me we can only be friends and is apparently 'with' the girl he'd been sleeping with before we started talking again. It's come out of nowhere, and quite a shock. I don't know whether it's just a rebound and he's worried that because we both went and slept with others it wouldn't work, he genuinely doesn't want to get back with me, or it's something else. Thoughts? TL;DR:

r/relationship_advice TITLE: [21/M] In a rut and unsure how to move forward. POST: Hey, Reddit! I've known my friend, [22/F], for close to 6 years now and we are pretty good friends. She's been in a couple of relationships in the first 2 years of our friendship, but that didn't bother me so much. However, over the next 4 years she didn't seem the same as she used to be, and I didn't want to ask anything too personal. About a week ago, I decided to tell her how I truly felt, but it didn't go so good. She had told me that she had an inability to show physical affection and was unable to be in a relationship. Upon hearing this, it felt like a kick in the chest. I knew something was wrong, but I never asked what and continued to go on with my selfish ambitions. Sure I am sad that she said no, but I can't help but feel like a bad friend for not inquiring. Now I am in a bit of a predicament and I don't know what I should be doing. She is a very important person to me and nothing would make me happier than to help her out. So, if any of you have had any similar experiences, would you be able to give me any advice on how to help her out? TL;DR:

r/relationship_advice TITLE: [15/M] My (i have no idea what)[18/F] is going to college, and I'm freaking out. POST: I(a 15 year old male) through a series of fortunate/unfortunate events, have fallen into a relationship with an 18 year old girl. This has been going on for about a month and a half now, we've gone to lunch, book shopped, etc..... Just extraneously, she also happened to by my first kiss. HOWEVER. She's going off to college in a few weeks, and I have no idea what to do. We've already established that we're gonna write to each other(platonicly)(letters, *gasp*) but I have no idea where to go from here. Every time i bring up the topic of "hey, this probably will never work" She usually adresses it with a "oh, what happens will happen, we'll see what happens in a few years." So, how, if at all, should I address this before she leaves? TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: Me [25 M] with my fiancee [25 F] duration 4 years and have been engaged for 1 year, Please i need some help whether i should move forward with this relationship POST: Background details My fiancee comes from a rich family. Her parents own businesses and are millionaire. They some how agreed for our engagement thinking that i am going to school and will have a good job. I basically work my ass off paying for my tuition, car,rent etc. I will be graduating soon and already getting job offers. I am very ambitious, hardworking and i dream big. On the other hand my fiancee is very logical and doesn't believe in me of achieving big dreams. She has applied to so many job but have failed to get one and basically lives off her parents money. We have argument every once a month about my financial situation. I am not broke and have a job and make $4000 a month. I will definitely find a better job once i graduate. She is disappointed that my parents didn't work hard and have no line of credit, house and savings. I always try to make her happy. I sacrifice more for her then she does for me. On the other hand she says she is sacrificing a luxurious lifestyle for me. I told her to leave me and find someone better. But she complains i am giving up on her so easily. She is afraid of getting married to me and living a life where she would have to struggle to get house, car etc because my parents are not wealthy. She also thinks that she is smarter than me because i have only lived in USA for 8 years. Also her parents put pressure on her that if she gets ends up getting married to me she will have to live a struggling life. I love this girl and don't want to give up on her this easily. But she keeps nagging about how i am not rich which bothers me a lot. Do you guys think i should stick with her or leave her so she can find someone better and with whom she can be happy. TL;DR:

r/loseit TITLE: Starting Strength good for someone not looking to lose much? Is there are better option? POST: Hi everyone, first post here (though I lurk like no other). I'm a 22 year old male, 5'8" about 180 lb, ~15% BF. I was hovering around 200 lb a few months back, but from mostly a few 4-5 mile runs a week plus modest diet adjustments, was able to shed a few pounds while training for a 5K I did last weekend. The problem is, I don't really know what to do in the gym. I'm fairly muscular for my height, but enjoy weightlifting. Running is okay but not my favorite exercise (and frankly, even with good shoes, I worry about knees/shins). I'm only looking to lose maybe 10-15 lb tops, as I am just now seeing definition in my lower abs/obliques. When I looked through FAQs/Starting Strength, it seems to be meant for people either looking to gain a decent amount or lose a large amount quickly (ie "Lose 40 pounds in 63 days"). I'm also getting confused when I look up HIIT training, as it's so open-ended that I'm finding few recommendations for my specific goals. What would you guys recommend in my situation? I'm relatively familiar with fitness terms/exercises/body processes, but I lack a basis to know when to go to the gym and what to do there. Thank you ll for your help! TL;DR:

r/personalfinance TITLE: [Credit] Student Loan Approval w/ Poor Credit POST: [Backstory] I am starting a nursing programme at a community college in my area. I currently live at home with my parents but the programme I was accepted into is a little over an hour away. My classes start at 8 am and I know if I have to commute I will be late several times. If I am late more than twice, I get kicked out of the programme. I made some financial mistakes in my youth, including getting a car repo'd, so my credit has not yet recovered over the past few years. I currently have a few hundred dollars in credit card debt, which I pay off as much as I can monthly. The last time I checked my credit score was about 560, and I'd like to refrain from "dinging" my score again, as I've read such behaviours are detrimental to credit score. I will need to borrow a few (7) thousand more dollars than the tuition due amount because I'll need it for rent for an apartment for the next year. Because of the course workload associated with clinicals, my work availability will be limited. I do have a cosigner who would be available, my father, but I would prefer not to involve him if possible. **[Question/ TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: For everyone getting over someone - this should help. [Me [21F] still getting over a guy [21M] from over a year ago]. POST: (Not originally mine, but saw this today on a different thread in reddit and it helped SO much). Hey. I know we haven't seen each other, or even talked, in a long time...but I've been doing a lot of thinking lately, and I want you to know that I miss you. Not like "I regret what happened" or even "I want to see you again." Just..."I miss you." Full stop. It's strange to think that someone I used to know so well is now a total stranger...that I sometimes go entire days without thinking of you even a little. Most of the time, I let myself forget, because it's easier. But then I find something: an old letter, or a picture you drew, slipped in the pages of a book I haven't read in years, and the full weight of what's been lost comes crashing down on me. But this isn't regret. We had reasons for ending it, and they're as valid as ever...but back at the start, we didn't need reasons for anything. It all just happened. We didn't have common interests, or similar goals...we didn't even really get along that well. But we didn't need a reason to fall in love. We just did. The reasons came at the end, and everything that's happened since has been all about reasons. And that's good. It means one day I might find someone I won't have to say goodbye to. But a part of me misses just loving someone, and knowing they love you back, and that's all. I guess what I'm saying is, I hope things are good with you. I hope everything is great. I hope you found a love that's all the things ours couldn't be. And I hope I find that too. But a small part of me hopes that you still remember what it was like before all the reasons...and that you miss me, too. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: I'm (23M) confused about what I want to do in my relationship. POST: So I've been with my current girlfriend (24F) for about 2 years, and things have been okay, not perfect but okay. She's my best friend and I really do love her but I feel like I should be out having fun and being a young guy instead of settling down at such a young age. The problem is, I don't want to regret breaking up in 2 months once I get "fun" out of my system. My girlfriend is a very up class citizen, while I, on the other hand, want to explore my mind a bit. I want to explore the drug community as I've only smoked marijuana but my girlfriend is 100 percent against it and we live together so I've been sober for a very long time. Next problem, the sex. I should rephrase that because really, there's no sex. We get intimate about once every 2 months. She also is never down for oral. In our 2 years I've received oral around 4 times. Problem is I LOVE BLOWJOBS! My final issue is that I pay a majority of the bills AND I get to do a majority of the chores. She does the dishes and vacuums, then calls it cleaning. I deep clean everything in our home about once a week, and then she makes it a mess again by the next week. Don't forget that she cooks a home meal about once every 3 nights. I also take care of our dog alone. I feel like I'm more of a care taker than a boyfriend. What do you guys think I should do? TL;DR:

r/Advice TITLE: Not sure if I should call out sick or not POST: I am feeling under the weather today and seriously considering calling out from work. My head is spinning, my nose is stuffed and I'm overall exhausted from some kind of head cold. The problem is, a while ago, I started calling out frequently because of panic attacks and anxiety that I got all straightened out now. I haven't called out from work in about a month and when I did last it was for a dentist appointment that I told my manager about day beforehand but couldn't find a cover for my shift. When I told her this she said something along the lines of "This is unacceptable". I'm sure she means my excessive call outs at the time but maybe she meant not finding a cover that day. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: Am I (16M) crazy for being pissed that my BF (15M) totally ignores me for hours to play video games. POST: Okay okay I know we all need personal time but in this long distance relationship I swear it always ends up with me being alone for a lot of our "talking time" (time we are both free) while he plays games. I can message a few times and still get ignored until its convenient to look away from the game and message me back. It personally pisses me off that this happens and I would like to bring it up but I don't know if I'm being crazy. In my own experience I keep my phone in my lap while playing a game and will pick it up to message back not too long after I get a message to keep a conversation going. Oh I should also mention that the games we both play are not multiplayer but single player. I play more slow paced JRPGs which I guess gives me more free time while he plays faster paced steam games which I guess might keep up most of his time. TL;DR:

r/loseit TITLE: Question about Fitbit and Exercise Calories POST: 25M 6'5" SW:375 CW:348 GW:220-240 BF%29 Hi /r/loseit, This is my first time posting and I'm having a hard time figuring out exercise calories. I have a pretty typical desk job at a power company, but I do get to go out in the field a bit every week. I have recently decided to get serious about losing weight and met with a nutritionist and set a good meal plan. On top of this i also wanted to start running. I got a Fitbit Charge HR to help motivate me and connected it to Myfitnesspal. **My question is:** How accurate is the calories burned being sent to Myfitnesspal from my fitbit? For example it gave me back 1740 calories in Myfitnesspal yesterday and all i did was run for 30 min. I try not to eat back exercise calories, but it still is bugging me. If something is wrong, how do I fix it? Thanks! This community is such an inspiration . TL;DR:

r/travel TITLE: Suggestions for Rome/Naples/Palermo POST: I'm booking a trip to Italy with my brother and will be 3 nights in rome, train to naples and then on to palermo by train (5 nights between the two including overnight train). We are going in January. Can anyone suggest any cool things they have done in or near any of these places ? is vesuvius normally Ok in winter - can you do the trip to the top or is it too cold ? Looking for cool history things (apart from the obvious coliseum, pompei... ) / nature / food / anything really if anyone has anything they enjoyed particularly TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: My [28M] girlfriend [26F] (6 years) wants to split up with me. I let her down twice, fooling around online. Should I rebuild relationship, and how? POST: At the weekend, my girlfriend said to me she wanted to break up with me. We have been together 6 years and she is my best friend and the one I saw myself spending the rest of my life with. The main reason for her wish to split up stems to one main reason: She doesn't trust me. About two years ago I had an addiction to an online webcam site. I couldn't control myself, and kept going on and chatting to girls. It eventually went beyond that however, as I would chat, and strip and masturbate with girls online. At one point I was almost doing this daily. They would always be random and I wouldn't arrange any regulars. As you would expect, she eventually found out. She said was very upset and felt very let down. I apologised, said I would control it and be better for her. She allowed me a second chance. So a year goes by, and I mostly keep it in check. Over the course of a year, I relapsed about 6 times. But she found out at the last time. I was open, explained I was getting into more control, but she was obviously still upset. She gave me one last chance. So that comes to last weekend. I have been clean for a year. No relapses. But unfortunately she is still hurt from the last time, and told me she can no longer trust me. Obviously, I understand that, but am desperate for her to stay with me. I love her very much, and she still loves me. We get on very well, and have a great chemistry. We have an incredibly strong bond, and she even described me as like 'her right arm'. She is my best friend, and I hers. Being separated feels like amputation. I really want to stay with her, but don't think that this time I could convince her to stay. So I would like some opinions - should she stick it out with me? And if so, what could rebuild that bridge of trust? TL;DR:

r/Dogtraining TITLE: 1 1/2 year old Poodle barking at guests and during walks. POST: I have a year old French toy poodle. Great dog, full of energy, and very well behaved. I only have one gripe with this dog. When he was younger (we adopted him from a pound in Ecuador), he had medical troubles which made him very sensitive to diseases and such. He is fine now, but for about half a month or so, we couldn't walk him or pretty much take him outside at all. This led to him not being socialized ideally with other dogs or other people besides my family. We've started walking him, but there's a problem. During walks, he barks at any other person he sees, once they're about, 50 or so feet away from us. He loses all consideration for my commands and just barks wildly without mercy until we're far enough from the people, or dog, he's barking at. Aside from this, he's very well behaved. I've trained him to do about 10 commands (sit, stand up, jump, roll over, etc.) and I'm certain he thinks of me as a dominant figure. I'm the only one who walks him, so I know he trusts me. I've tried smacking when he barks and rewarding when he doesn't, but that hasn't worked. The same applies to when we have guests over. Other than this, he's been just fine. We play fetch and wrestle everyday and what-have-you, but the barking problem is huge. But because of this, I haven't been able to bathroom train him properly. What methods have any of you guys found to be effective to suppress bad barking behavior? Many thanks to anyone who gives a suggestion. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: My boyfriend [M/25] refuses to have a Valentine's day with me [F/24] this year because my aunt's wedding is that day? POST: So he's my boyfriend of 7 years. He's very stubborn. Well anyway he refuses to be with me for Valentine's day because my aunt's 25th anniversary wedding is that day and he says celebrating the next day has no point and he says there will be no Vday this year he's mad like if it's my fault my aunt picked that day. He doesn't wanna go to the wedding either. He's mad now even though I've been telling him this since December but he doesn't remember because I now realize he hasn't been paying attention the entire time I've tried to tell him. Its always like this with him on holidays or any day. If even one detail goes wrong there is no holiday or no celebration. Should I make him happy and just spend valentines with him or what?? I'm just so bummed out right now...I already had a nice gift for him ordered too... TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: My[22 F] boyfriend [22 M] of a year no longer wants sex. POST: In the beginning of our relationship, he couldn't get his hands off me. We had a long distance relationship, but when we were together we had sex every day, sometimes more than once a day. As time went on it naturally died down a bit, but now his desire for me is gone almost altogether. We live near each other now and see each other every day, but have sex *maybe* once a week. And I'm always the one to initiate. Half the time, when we do have sex, he does it to make me happy. Once we get started he'll get into it, but he seems a bit reluctant at first. The thing that bothers me most, though, is that he barely ever wants blow jobs anymore either. I get that he's tired a lot with school and work and everything, and sex takes effort. But all he has to do is lay there and he still doesn't want it. Which would be fine, if he didn't watch porn and masturbate every night. That just hurts my feelings. He says he's still attracted to me, but it's hard to believe that. One last thing to add is that he's put on a significant amount of weight recently and it really bothers him. I still think he looks great and I tell him that all the time, but he gets down on himself. I know that's a factor in him not wanting to get naked in front of me, which kind of makes me want to encourage him to lose weight so he'll feel more confident. But I don't want him to get the impression that I want him to lose weight because I think he looks bad or anything and shatter his confidence further. TL;DR:

r/tifu TITLE: TIFU by calling my mother a chode. POST: My mom and sister took a girls trip to Disney World. I called them while they were at the airport to wish them well. After the call, I get a text that says "You are so fat." My sister's nickname for me is fatty. My normal response is, "bite me, *insert expletive here*." So I send two texts right back that say, "Bite me," and the second one was, "You chode." Right as I hit send for the second message I get another one that says, "Oops! Autocorrect." I look at the name and realize that I have just called my mother a "chode." So I start immediately texting her and I am typing so fast that i make mistakes that auto correct fucks up even further. I send two or three strings of autocorrect gibberish before I say fuck it and call her. I explain that I thought she was my sister because she called me fat and the next thing out of her mouth is, "What's a chode?" So I tell her. She tells me I am foul and I can hear my sister in side-splitting hysterics on the other end of the call. In the end, she found it pretty funny, but I still can't believe that I actually called my mother a chode. TL;DR:

r/dogs TITLE: How does my dog know? POST: I live in a 2 floor apartment. Today, when I was upstairs, someone came to drop off a package. I was upstairs with my music on and the dog was sitting on the floor, same room as I was. Suddenly the dog ran downstairs to bark and announce the dude's presence. However, *he had not yet knocked*. The room we were in was at the back of the house, the walk is at the front. I did not hear the truck and I was expecting it. How does my dog know he's coming? Also, when me or my bf come back the dog hears from upstairs, but he doesn't bark. He knows its us. The door is closed and latched, presumably airtight, opaque... doesn't matter what the season is. Is my dog a superdog? TL;DR:

r/relationship_advice TITLE: Girlfriend mad at me POST: Sorry, this is going to be a long post. So I'm a [17/m] and my girlfriend is [16/f] we have been going out for three months and have gotten pretty serious. Recently she got mad at me because I told her my mother is uncomfortable with us hanging around at my house doing nothing for hours. But my girlfriend took it as my mom isn't comfortable with her. Now she doesn't feel comfortable coming over. So I explained to her that love has no bounds and that she has to overcome these feelings. Than she all of snapped at me and said, "Get over it? Well f*** you than. Because clearly you don't get it." And said she didn't want to come over or talk to me. Well later that evening she messages me on Skype saying she's not coming over and I ask if she was ready to talk and she said she didn't care. So I waited it out and than she texts me sating she feels bad we are fighting. So what should I do, should I wait for her to apologize, is she playing games with me? Any advice would be appreciated, again sorry for such a wall of text. TL;DR:

r/dating_advice TITLE: [18/m] planning to ask out a classmate/neighbor [18/f]..Process being complicated due to Her mother. POST: first post here..yay!! anyways,i have a long time crush(1.5 years if i remember correctly).when we first met(we first met as neighbors)later i learnt that we would be going to the same college.. we were not in the same class initially,but recently(3 months ago),we were put in the same class. we have been getting closer like we speak everyday and i have caught her staring at me across the class on many occasions. we share notes ,books etc..she`s giving me subtle hints that she`s interested too.i plan to ask her out but the problem here is,i have IMMENSE respect for her mother who treats me like her own son . if i ask my crush out,and her mother gets to know about it,it might make things awkward. the college term ends in 2 1/2 months from now and i dont want to wait until then for obvs reasons. i want some advice(when i am telling her that i like her) on the words which wont hurt her mother if she were to know about it.(i am unable to find any other suitable phrase,pardon me!) TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: I (17M) have been dating my girlfriend (16 F) for 6 months, and I know I still love her but don't know how I feel about the relationship. What should I do? POST: So we've been dating for six months and it has been good, we've been through some rough stuff but we have helped each other make it through. I know I love her and care about her and want her to be happy in life. I just don't know how I feel about our relationship. There are times where I feel that I need my independence this summer to build on myself and my future without having to worry about someone else, but I worry about her at the same time. I also feel immense attraction to so many more people around me. It has gotten to the point of slipping anonymous notes into someone's bag when they aren't looking. It may also be pointed out that I haven't had real sex in my relationship since Valentines Day. It has gotten to the point where when we hang out it is pretty much just us getting each other off and I feel like we don't relate on much. This leads her to sort of think that I just want sex out of the relationship, but that isn't it at all. I have always felt that I'm never content with what I have and that once I have something I lose interest, and I've tried to stick it through this time around, but I don't feel the same about the relationship. We're currently on a break because we both mutually felt we needed it. She still loves me extensively and wants to be with me still, but I just don't know if I feel it. I don't know if I'm giving up what I have because I think I could have better or what, but I've been so conflicted. I worry about her if I broke up with her and how it would affect her and I don't want to hurt her, but I don't want to stay in a relationship for the sake of not hurting her feelings. What should I do? I know I'll probably just hear the same things I've already thought but it is worth a shot. TL;DR:

r/AskReddit TITLE: How can I go about talking to this girl without coming across as a stalker. POST: Hey Reddit, I went to Video Games Live in Milwaukee yesterday (it was one of the best experiences I've ever had, it was a great show) and I met this girl. She was dressed up as someone from Kingdom Hearts and had an amazing replica Keyblade. Even though she was this nerdy, she was incredibly hot. So to keep it simple, I instantly had an interest in her and wanted to get to know her more. The problem is, after we talked for a while and really hit it off, security came up to us and told us that we had to leave because the show ended. So she left and I realized, I didn't get her name, number, anything! Hoping that there would still be a chance at finding her on Facebook, I went on Facebook and searched "video games live" in everyone's status. Sure enough, one of this girl's friends put a status about making a Keyblade for her friend. So from there I looked at his friends list and amazingly enough, I found her! Now even though I want to get to know her, she probably didn't think anything of me. So if I added her on Facebook, there's a chance that she wouldn't even know who I was. But in that chance that she would remember me, how would I go about contacting her through Facebook without appearing to be a creeper? I mean I managed to find her Facebook without knowing anything about her, which amazed me. So is there any hope? Or is any and every possibly plan of action a sure-fire way to creep her out? TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: Me [25 F] with my bf [28 M] of 1 year are sexually incompatible. He wants an open relationship. I don't. Am I being selfish? POST: I really love my bf, and I'm sure he loves me too! Everything is great, except the sex. Meaning we have none. He is really into diaper play and stuff (he wants me to wear them). He told me 2 months in. I thought I would be okay to wear a diaper every once in a while to turn him on. But I did not know, that this is the only thing that turns him on. he wants this to be a really regular thing, and I'm not comfortable with that at all. I told him that I'm not into it, that I can play along every once in a while but that this is not my fetish. This resulted in us having no sex at all. This situation is not okay for me at all. I really like sex and I need it. But being with him is more important to me than having a great sex life. He wants to stay in the relationship too. He wants to have a future with me. BUT he wants an open relationship. He wants to fuck other girls wearing diapers. He does not understand that I am not okay with an open relationship. He says it is just sex and has nothing to do with love. And keeps on asking why I don't want him to have a fulfilling sex life. I want him to have a great sex life, but I don't want him to have sex with other partners. Am I being selfish? And is there any other solution out there besides an open relationship or breaking up? TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: Me [26 M/F] with my friend [22 M/F] of 6 years, recently started dating. She is fresh out of a relationship. POST: As the title says, I begun to casually date someone I have known for the past 6 years. She just got out of a long term relationship (of 2 years) and I feared she was on the rebound but after numerous discussions with her, she feels she is ready to see me but also needs time to learn to live by herself and collect her emotions. Which I agreed to. The first 3 weeks, we hit it of right away and would hang out once or twice a week. Things were great. Suddenly, last week there was radio silence on all fronts so I decided to call her. She stated she has been just enjoying being alone and not messaging anyone. I took it for what it was. We haven't hung out in 1 1/2 weeks and suddenly talk not nearly as much. Maybe I am reading too much into this. My first reaction is to back off, even though I want to see her. I just have not experienced these up and down signs she is giving me. Any suggestions? TL;DR:

r/relationship_advice TITLE: [m22] If i've cheated in my past, how do i tell the person i'm seeing now? POST: During my last relationship i cheated on my boyfriend (of one year) with someone else. It was with a stranger and it didn't mean anything to me really, but I regreted it. As you can guess, i was caught, he read my texts. I don't have a reason why i did it, i loved my boyfriend, honestly. I knew that not only was there a dissonance between who i was and wanted to be, but also between who i thought i was and who i was. My (now-ex) boyfriend saw that i was broken and decided to try and get me help. I saw a psychologist, and went to Sex Addicts Anonymous. I learned I was a sexual person, had vulnerabilities, but was stonger in will-power than i thought. Now that i feel i have a more control of myself and am more confident that i won't let myself hurt someone like that again, i find it incredibly hard to move forward in a relationship. I've been seeing someone for about two months now--but what has to happen next is letting my guard down. I haven't told him yet, its not exactly something you say on a first date. I know that if i can talk about this with him, i will be at my most vulnerable. I want to be clear with him that even i get afraid of being cheated on, and that if either of us are too tried by temptation, we should be honest and communicative about how we feel. I'd rather not be lied to. The question is, how do i tell him about my past? Should i even? When do i tell him? TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: Me [16 M] with my EXGF [16 F] 3 Months, She has moved on and seems fine POST: Basically my EXGF and I just broke up, for the 2 weeks before she slowly started to ignore me more and more and then I finally had it and broke up with her.. I didn't want to at ALL but it was better then staying with her... And I am just getting really upset because she seems PERFECTLY fine about the break up even though at 2 months she said she never wanted to lose me and I am such an important person in her life.. total bullshit. Her friend Ross and her are really good friends, and she talked about him a bit whilst we were dating.. now that we are not they are spending every minute they can together.. and in front of me they will hold hands and stuff, you know, stuff a couple would do.. Basically I feel like what we had was just total bull crap and I don't know how to approach this or whatever.. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: My (28/F) BF (29/m) describes his ex as "so out of his league". Am I wrong to take offense? POST: My bf of 2 months (and friend of 10 years) was telling me about an exgf of 6 or so years ago. He described her as "so out of his league" and proceeded to tell me how she did modeling and his friend's eyes "popped out of their head" when they met her. He said in hindsight he "never felt comfortable" because he was convinced she could do better. She ended up cheating on him and his insecurities proved to be true because "she found someone more in her league". I tried to explain to him that by defining it as a 'league' which this other girl is 'above', it's easy to conclude that given the choice, a person would rather be with a person in a higher 'league', and futhermore one 'settles' with a person in a lesser 'league' that they see as an equal (me). Am I over-thinking this or do I have a real reason to feel upset/slighted over this? TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: I [21 F] feel like I'm obligated to be friends with 23 MtF just because she's trans POST: Hi guys! I'm really conflicted here and don't know how to broach this subject. So for the purpose of this story, let's say my name is Katherine. I joined a housing group last year where there was one member there who used to go by "Chris". She officially transitioned to female this past December, which is all well and good. The thing is that.....as a person, I am really not fond of her at all. I find her to be controlling (she wants to be involved on every issue even when it's not directly related to her) and clingy (she messages me constantly. There's finally one other girl in our housing group, and she messages her constantly now too). And when she revealed to me that she wanted her female name to be "Catherine", I'll admit that I found it off-putting given that it's one letter off from my name (and also how I am one of the few female friends who she considers to be close with). But I told her I was okay with it because I feel like I shouldn't have a say in what name she wants to choose. So here I am. Very often do I find myself wanting space from her, and very often does she want to come to me to talk and stuff. And the more I see her nowadays, the more I worry I'm going to blow up at her. I don't want her to think that I dislike her because she's trans now, but I am quickly growing to not want to be near her. What advice do you guys have for how I should handle this? I feel like the obvious answer is to break off the friendship, but in some cases I do want to be there for her if she needs help.....just I can't help her every single waking moment. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: Me [20 M] with my former long-term ex [20 F], states she doesn't doesn't want to just be friends, she wants more. POST: My ex and I have been together for a few years now and got through a very difficult time in regards to approval from one another's family. After resolving this issue things were going steady with the occasional arguments resulting from misunderstandings or bad habits. When it came time to further our education, I went to a different University for a while due to financial reasons which caused us to break-up being that a long distance relationship was too much. Upon getting everything in order and being able to go to the same University, we got back together only to be faced with other issues that caused us to break up whereby we chose to be close friends until I started to give her some space so she could hang out with her friends. As the days went by our interactions were minimal even though we're close friends. Recently she came up to me saying how she misses me and doesn't want to be just friends being that I mean so much to her and that she had to move on because I wouldn't fight for her but would go back to how things were if she could. Being that she broke up with me both times, was the first to move on and start going out on dates almost instantly when we would be broken up I find this rather odd. Out of respect and not wanting to be annoying/harassing her I let her move on while I faded off into the distance silently. If she was the one that would break everything off, shun me out, and move on rather quickly why is this coming up now? I don't exactly follow how I was the one that didn't fight for her when she was the one pushing me away. TL;DR:

r/BreakUps TITLE: I feel awful after breaking up with her. Help? POST: I'm a 15 year old guy and I very recently broke up with my 15 year old girlfriend. We would have been dating for a year on the 16th of October. There were many reasons I had to do this, these two being the most important: * I had started fading out of the relationship for about a month or so. We started to run out of things to talk about and things were getting boring. * If we continued dating, things would have only gotten worse and the break up would have been more painful for the both of us. Even though I am the one who ended the relationship, I still have some feelings for her (not incredibly strong, but still prevalent). I still care about her greatly and I want her to be okay. She is a great girl, but she has been mad at me and incredibly upset because she says she never saw it coming. She has posted some things on facebook that have hurt me and she accused me of not caring about her. Because she feels bad, I feel bad. I know that I caused her to be upset and I just cant seem to get over this guilt and her inadvertently making me feel bad. My biggest concern is that we might not be friends anymore. I want to maintain a friendship even if it wont be for a while. Any advice about what to do would be beneficial. This is my first big relationship and I am completely lost on what to do. TL;DR:

r/legaladvice TITLE: Do I have a chance asking for child support when I've previously not fought for it? POST: TX, USA here. At the age of 19, I met a man, 27, in 2008 at work, we became involved and I found myself pregnant after four months of dating him, at the age of 20. We were married while I was pregnant and spent three years together, producing one other child. The relationship fell apart due to differences in many things and abusive behavior on his part. I couldn't stand the thought of my children being raised by a broken woman and I left. I filed for divorce, asked for nothing in the case as he had threatened me with a battle and was very insistent he would get our children and I would be paying HIM. Our 1st child was 2 yrs old and our 2nd was 6 months at the time of the divorce. They are now 5 (almost 6) and 4. Since then I have had the children consistently 4 days a week, with our divorce decree stating once the children are in full time school I will have them at minimum 5/7 days of the week. Things have been amicable but I am beginning to regret not asking for some sort of support as I have lost my job and am having difficulties taking care of our bills. We receive some assistance from the government however my unemployment is maxed out. I do not want my ex husband to go under, regardless of the awful things he did, I want my children to have a nice home to call their own. Is it selfish of me to want that home to be with me and need assistance to give it to them? I was laid off recently and am going to school for some training, slated to enter the work force in 03/15 and expect to once again earn an above poverty wage. Do I have a chance at getting some sort of help from him or is it likely he will gain custody? Obviously I will need to see a lawyer in person about this but I'm looking for an idea of what to expect? TL;DR:

r/dating_advice TITLE: I'm 50 years old and newly re-entering the dating field. How do I tell when a woman is interested in me, and not just being friendly? POST: I've been out of the dating "scene" for a while, though I've been unattached considerable longer. (For a few years I was my mother's primary caregiver while she had dementia, until she passed away, so I wasn't really available for dating then.) I'm back in school now to update my education and qualifications for getting a decent job. Most of the women in my classes are considerably younger than I am. But a few of them have been behaving in ways that I'm not sure of. Very "touchy-feel-y". I'm not sure if this is an indication of interest, or if I may be misperceiving signals, given that I've been out of touch with the majority of humanity lately while taking care of my mom. So, on one hand, I don't want to be missing potential opportunities, but on the other, I don't want to make an unwanted advance and be perceived as a lech. TL;DR:

r/AskReddit TITLE: i have a brain disorder that murders use as their defense...AMA POST: so i have [intermittent explosive disorder] i was diagnosed when i was a small child (about 6) after a number of outbursts. a quick description of the disorder is that i have a funny frontal lobe. so my brain has difficulty dealing with emotions and i can reach "overload" if i don't actively address feelings that i have. if i don't, then i can begin to interpret experiences wrong and getting upset and have a disproportionate response. i don't black out during these episodes but i do have limited memory of what happens. i also have super human strength. i've ripped doors off of hinges as a small child, put my hands through walls and taken on 6 nurses at a hospital (i lost that last fight. not without biting someone first, or so i was told). afterwards, i sleep for a long time and wake up feeling much calmer. i'm usually also able to deal with the early emotional issue that i have, as my more level head. as a child these episodes happened about once a month, which initially was what pushed my parents to have me examined. now, as an adult (im in my mid 20s) the episodes happen about 1 or 2 a year. i've read articles in which people have used this disorder as a defense for murdering someone. here's an article i read on [npr]( that's kind of a trip. obviously i don't plan on murdering anyone anytime soon, but it is unnerving to see people use after they've murdered someone. other than having an episode a year, i don't have much trouble with it. it's difficult to explain to people and because of this, i only tell those that are close to me. the name doesn't really help; it's also referred to as "episodic rage." my mother and her mother have it as well; i was told that that was pretty rare. it's predominantly diagnosed in men. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: I [24F] had a meet-cute with a guy [20-Something M] Just found him- Not sure where to go from here POST: Sorry for the long story but I'm new to this area and don't really have any close friends to turn to for advice yet. This weekend I was at my favorite bar and it happened to be karaoke night. I'm having fun singing along with my girlfriends and I keep catching eye contact with this ridiculously good looking guy. Every time I look over at him, he's already looking at me and keeps eye contact until I break it. Some time passes and I hear him say he's going to go have a cig so I grab my pack and head out, ask him if I could use his lighter and he lights my cigarette for me. We chat for a few minutes and have a great chemistry, it seriously felt like a cheesey Hallmark movie. He asked me my name and vice versa, he heads back in and I stay outside for a few minutes. When I come back inside it's his turn is up to sing karaoke, he sings a really cute oldie and continually points at me. It was fucking adorable. A few minutes later I go to the restroom to give my self a little talk to psych myself up to give him my number, because I have hella social anxiety. When I leave the bathroom I catch the back of his head leaving the bar, his table is empty, I completely missed my chance. Well that brings me to where I am now, I know his first name so I went into full creeper mode and facebook searched his first name and our city. It's a common male name and I'm in a huge city so it took about 3 or 4 pages but I found him.. and he's super well known for what he does. Quick google search found me his other social media accounts and info on him. I really want to reach out and add him on facebook or twitter or something but I have absolutely no idea how to do it without looking like some desperate creep. Help? TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: How do I convince my [24M], SO [24F] that one accident shouldn't rule out all intimacy. POST: Hello /r/relationships I am a 24M with a SO [24F] of just over 3 years, in early 2014 we had a mishap during sex that resulted in the condom ripping. She was positive she would become pregnant. I was calm and went to CVS, bought plan b and felt that the situation was handled. We continued with our daily routine with the only issue being her period was a few days late. *But here's the issue, since that incident we have had sex maybe four times. Any time I push the issue she comes up with another excuse for why she isn't in the mood. *I managed to pry a bit and find out the reason is that she is afraid of another incident and becoming pregnant. But here's the kicker. We always use a condom, she is religious about taking her BC at the same time everyday, and finally I pull out before I finish just in case. *Is this something I just deal with since in a way it was my fault it happened? I don't "need" sex or sexual contact but I am beginning to feel like she being excessively paranoid about an accidental pregnancy. Is this a normal reaction? TL;DR:

r/personalfinance TITLE: Are there options for beginners other than basic savings? POST: I am a complete n00b when it comes to doing anything but withdrawing money from the ATM. Hyperbole of course, but I've never had anything but a checking account. I am over 30 and am having some existential panic about the fact I have no savings or investments. I have been in college forever collecting degrees and am currently in the latter stages of finishing a PhD in neuroscience. So, needless to say, I've never really had much in the way of extra income. I currently have zero credit card debt, but I have accrued some sizable student loan debt (<$70K). I do not own a home, no kids, and, like I said, I've never built up savings. I feel I have consistent enough income that I should do something with my money other than spend it. I could easily manage $100-200 dollars a month. But, with interest rates being so lame right now, it's hard to see any quantifiable returns with the paltry amounts I would be putting in an IRA or CD. Everything I've ever read says that it is prudent to have 3-6 months of pay in savings, but that would take quite awhile. Basically, I would be breaking almost every rule if I did anything but save my money right now. But, I get restless feeling like I am getting a late start. I've read about Automatic Investment Programs, and they would be practically feasible for me. But, every beginners guide says I lack the assets (home, considerable savings, etc) to even think about entering the market. I am also probably a long time away from reaching those assets. Sorry for the rambling post, but I would love to hear opinions of people who have floated the same boat I am in right now. Should I just start packing money away, or are there other options that might generate better returns? Cheers. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: What should I [F/22] know about possibly dating someone [M/21] just out of a long-term relationship? POST: Some important points about his break up: * His girlfriend of 3 years cheated on him, he ended things * They've been broken up for about a month * They used to live together, he is now moved out * It was a shitty relationship, but he loved her Between me and him: * Known each other for 3 years * Not close - just same friend group, we probably only spoke properly after he and his GF broke up * Went out twice - coffee, dancing on a double date with mutual friends (bit of grinding, mostly silly) * Little bit of affection while drinking, mostly platonic at this point * Message frequently * We are in the same friend group I should also include that I've really only ever been in short term (6 months) or casual relationships, so I don't really know what he's going through, though I can empathize. I'm not sure what we are or what we will be, but right now there is definitely interest. He even messaged me after both dates saying how much he enjoyed my company and that he had a fantastic time. I'd really like to date him and I'm fine with moving slowly. There's a lot of chemistry and common interests, etc.. But, obviously it's not ideal that he's fresh out of a relationship. What should I know about dating someone who's possibly vulnerable or still has feelings for their ex? What's some advice I can use to make this go as smoothly as possible? I know that it's likely he just won't be ready, or might be re-bounding, but that's a risk I'm willing to take. TL;DR:

r/personalfinance TITLE: Landlord gives my friend the runaround; how are checks deposited? (NJ) POST: First, I've already read [this thread] and learned quite a bit about going to the small claims court etc. Seems like that would be the last resort. * My friend rented a bedroom for a month from Jul - Aug 2014 in NJ. When she moved out at the end of the month, the landlord told her that she will mail her a check for the deposit. * 30 days came and gone. Texts and emails went unanswered. My friend went to the landlord in person and asked about the deposit. The landlord told her that a check will be mailed. My friend is a bit of a pushover so she bought that. I would have demanded a check in person at the point. It's already late October at this point. * The same thing went on for a couple of months. Finally in early December, my friend went in person and the landlord gave her a check that is dated THREE WEEKS in the future. Again, my friend is a pushover so she bought that. I would have probably refused to leave until the landlord gives me CASH at that point. * Then 2 days before the check was dated, the landlord called her and told her NOT to deposit the check - there are some problems with the landlord's bank account, and my friend will be given a new check. This is early December. * No emails/text/call came since then. My friend went AGAIN in person and inquired about the check. Landlord told her that landlord will call her when things are straightened out. What an absolutely crock of BS. **Now my question** --- if my friend has the check (issued by a regional bank with physical branches), can she just go to the branch and cash the check? Can she ask the teller to verify that there's money in the bank? Can the landlord stop payment on the check if/when the landlord realizes the money is being drawn? TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: I [ 17/F] am insecure about showing my body to my boyfriend [17/M] . POST: Soo , my boyfriend traveled a little over a week ago . We have been texting a lot to stay in contact. last night though, he asked me to send him .. tit pics (yeah he still hadn't seen them). And since it's been like 2 months since we started dating (I know its not a lot), and that he has felt them before, I didn't really mind . I sent him the pics. I instantly regretted that decision .. I am really insecure about my entire body, I am 34D and my body is really small so my lady bits look too big for me. And well, he kinda pointed it out. He said it nicely though because he is sweet , but he said that i needed to fix my posture to be "upright and tight " . I instantly understood what he meant (droopy booby) . Anyways we talked and he gave me tips on how to exercise . We then somehow ended up talking about stretch marks...I have a whole load of those on my butt, but he doesn't know that yet . He proceeded to call stretch marks ugly ... I have accepted my body a long time ago , and i personally don't mind my stretch marks or boobs, in fact i like them. Should I tell him now that I have stretch marks and just bring up all my body insecurities or just let him find out on his own , though it feels like lying to him TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: Me [19 M] with my girlfriend[20 F] 5 months, left me because of her illness POST: She left me because she felt her recovering from her mental issues was being hindered by our relationship nurturing an unhealthy dependency upon me for her happiness. Everything was perfect between us otherwise. I want to help her but it seems the best thing we could do is give her space and call our relationship off completely. But I love this girl, honestly. I have had many girlfriends but she is the one. It will take time and I know I need to keep busy, but I honestly think there's a future for us together. Am I being too optimistic? Could there be a future for us? How could we reconcile when we can't speak in order for her to be happy in herself? How would I know when that had happened? I really do not want to let this go and I'm really worried I haven't fought hard enough for our relationship. Someone please help me out. I am so confused. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: 4 months ago, I [18 M] started dating someone [18 F] I really liked. Then she wants to take a break a month later POST: She told me she was going through problems she needed to deal with, and we should get to know each other better as friends before continuing our relationship. I was really sad at first, but understood her logic. Now, I've never been good socially; my only other relationship took place when I was 15 and it was with a girl who was physically attracted to me but I never felt the same way about her (I thought I'd develop an attraction over time and it never happened, but I digress). This girl is different because I like her and she said she had feelings for me, but she was too caught up with anxiety and depression to feel comfortable in a relationship We continued to be good friends, since she doesn't have many and I've been depressed before so I understand how much a good friend helps in that situation. Not to mention we have similar interests so we get along very well. Now she feels better, but I am having a lot of trouble building the courage to ask her to take me back. Hell, the only reason we got together in the first place was because my buddy told her I liked her and she asked me to confirm the suspicion. I know she isn't after anyone else and I know she's not been in many relationships before. I just need to know what I can do about this. I have no problem being her friend, but I need to know for sure if she wants to keep it that way or if she wants something more. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: I [20 M] broke up with my gf [18 F] for unique reasons. Am I being unreasonable? POST: We met at work. She's an amazing girl; funny, beautiful, and really sweet. We dated for 3 months. In this time, we hung out maybe 5-6 times. Every time, it was at her house. The reason? Her mom controls her life. She isn't allowed to go out. She isn't allowed to drive the car she pays insurance for. She has no social life because of this. I'm currently in college two hours from where she lives. I've been driving every weekend to spend a couple of hours with her; all of our "dates" have a time limit imposed by her mom. I'm sick of her not being able to go out, or come visit me. She's telling me that she'll move out so we can be together and I think that's insane, especially for a 3 month relationship. Especially because she told me long ago that she wasn't mature enough to be on her own, so I know she doesn't really want to move out. I'm not happy about the breakup, but I don't see how we're supposed to progress as a couple. Am I being selfish? I feel like we could have been a great couple, but this is ridiculous. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: Should I (20s/f) write a note to OBGYN (?) over perceived negligence? POST: I know non romantic posts are okay, so hope it's okay to post a patient-doctor question on here. I recently delivered a beautiful baby, however I have some concerns over my OBGYNs care. I've decided to find a new doctor but don't know if I should write a note to let out some of my pent up frustration and address the issue. My child was born under five lbs. and I feel the doctor was negligent in her care. Some concerns were: * I didn't see the OBGYN for the last 8+ weeks of my pregnancy, just the nurse practitioner. * The nurse practitioner made comments about how small my stomach was, as did the nurses in the labor ward. * Child measured on track at 30 week sonogram but week 34 my blood pressure went up + stayed up. Feet were majorly swollen rest of pregnancy. Blood was taken once for this. NP said my maybe my bp baseline must have just gone up and wasn't concerned (high 130s/high 70s) Looking back it seemed like there were signs something was up and that if I would have actually seen the OBGYN or the NP would have taken my increased blood pressure more seriously I could have been put on bed rest, giving the baby more time to grow, or at least had another sonogram and could have prepared for a preemie. (Had to buy new car seat for smaller baby, new clothes, special order a paci, etc.) I didn't go for my recent 6 week checkup and am seeing a new OBGYN from here on out. Do I bother to write a polite note with my concerns or let it be? If so, would I send it just to the OB or to HR at the hospital she works for as well? I just feel like they dropped the ball and am upset. TL;DR:

r/jobs TITLE: First job - 21 years old - Trouble fitting in POST: I'm in a weird situation where I feel like my coworkers don't respect me. During high school, I skipped a grade (sophmore year) and went to a top engineering college when I was 17. From my very first year till my last year, I worked with my best friends on a startup. Although our company wasn't successful, I learned a lot in the process. I graduated with my B.S. last year at age 20. When I went job hunting, I managed to leverage all my experience to land a good job. I am a Principal Engineer (PE) at a mid-size (500-2000 employees) company earning 190k/yr (160k + 30k/yr stock). Fast forward to today. Since I've been here for a year, I feel as if my coworkers do not respect me the same way they do other PEs. I am the youngest PE in the company and sometimes it hurts me. I was initially brought on to design a new product for the company (a product similar to what my startup worked on). During meetings, when I suggest and strongly urge the team to take a certain direction/approach/technology, I am reprimanded for being too young. This is despite the fact that I have intimate knowledge about how to best architect the product and more experience in the field than all of my coworkers. During day-to-day conversations, my age and perceived inexperience is a frequent talking point. Frankly, if it didn't impact my ability to do my job, I wouldn't mind so much. But now, I'm getting sick of it. Does anyone have any suggestion for what to do? TL;DR:

r/Advice TITLE: Any tips/shortcuts for a guy moving out for the first time? POST: Hi guys, I'll try to keep this short for you. I'm a 20 year old Male university student from Australia (yes, g'day mate), looking to move out with 3 other close friends that I've been friends with for at least 6 years and (hopefully) soon after with my girlfriend (who would be moving over from Denmark for a year) in the same house (going for a spacious house). My friends are also looking at the possibility of their girlfriends/potential girlfriends living with us half or all of the time (the way we see it, it cheapens rent.), however my girlfriend is the only one who would NEED a place to stay since she would be moving over from Denmark. Anyway, so I'm wondering if from your wide range of international knowledge, that you might have any tips for me or anyone else in a similar stage of life, being that this would be my first time moving out, and the people I'm moving out with matter to me. I suppose the tips I'm most interested in are financial shortcuts, but I'd be blessed to hear any tips you had for me, as I surely can't foresee everything. Even if they don't necessarily apply to me, because perhaps someone else may benefit from reading this then too. Thanks in advance guys and girls! TL;DR:

r/relationship_advice TITLE: "I don't want to tell you why I'm mad; you should know on your own." How do I deal with this? POST: Going for outside help concerning relationships is usually my *last* resort, but this issue is driving me nuts. Backstory: Been seeing a girl for about 7 months now; only been "official" for about 3. We're great together. Laugh a lot, joke with each other, blah blah. The only thing that bugs me is that she is fairly closed off and *sometimes* emotionally distant. The worst way this manifests itself is that if she's mad at me about something she won't tell me what it is. She won't even tell me she's mad. I can usually figure it out by the way she acts. Then she'll admit it, but won't tell *why* she's mad. Instead, she'll say I should know why. My reasoning to her is that I want to make her happy and stop doing whatever bothers her, so she should tell me. She responds with: "No, I don't want you to change. You should be who you are, and I either accept it or don't." In a sense I see her POV, but mostly it frustrates me because I think it's completely normal and acceptable to change certain things for a person you're enamored with. So basically, I'm with a girl who feels it's more normal to keep issues bottled up until she explodes with rage and realizes she doesn't want to be with me. I, on the other hand, am of the opinion that relationships should be as open as possible and couples should be willing to change for each other if they want to be with each other. I guess I just don't know who to explain this adequately to her, and any help would be appreciated. TL;DR:

r/tifu TITLE: TIFU By playing Xbox while I had a girl over. POST: So this happened last night and it was more of the girls FU then mine but... There is this girl called S I see every once is a while. We used to date but that ended when she posted something about us on Twitter and her parents found out (she isn't allowed to date). That was nearly a year ago and she comes over to "hang out" and after a little while I decide to play Arkham Knight to show her the story and the dynamic between the Joker and Harley Quinn. She is getting into it and decides to start snap chatting people. I contine on with the game and I notice she is taking a video of me. I told her to don't send that to anyone or post it on her snap story but she did anyways. Soon I pause the game and we start having some fun, then her phone rings. Her mom has been calling her (she had 7 missed calls) and she found out that S was with me and wanted her home now. The mom found out because S has her a member of her family on Snap chat and told the mom. The thing is that S's mom thinks that S is only 30 minutes away but I happen to live nearly 2 hours away. So S has to go and I give her money for toll (she didn't think she would need it on the way up) and I went back to playing some Arkham Knight extremely frustrated. TL;DR:

r/relationships TITLE: My [M/28] friend [M/31] of 10 years turned out to be a sociopath POST: I'm in a serious quandary here. A guy I'd been friends with for 10 years completely screwed me over recently and disowned me. He did it with no emotion and no regret, immediately moving on like the whole friendship never happened. I don't want to get into all the details but the short story is we ran a business together, I helped him set it up and did countless hours of free work, once the business was established and he'd gotten what he wanted from me he tossed me aside and cut me off as a friend, using ridiculous self-contrived reasons as an excuse. It was an incredibly toxic and abusive relationship (not physically, but he was a master of guilting me into doing things and constantly making me feel like shit for things which weren't remotely my fault or as bad as he made them out to be), and while overall I'm kind of glad that it's over, like a victim of Stockholm Syndrome I'm still somewhat saddened. I guess giving 10 years of your life to someone will do that. My problem is that now that I know his true colours I almost feel obligated to tell people. I see him using the same manipulation tactics on his new "friends" and want to warn them of his true nature. But at the same time I feel like it would just make me come across as the bitter ex-friend or that people simply wouldn't believe me. Because isn't that the greatest strength of a sociopath - that they fool everyone around them into believing something that isn't true? Still, I know I personally would've liked some warning from someone when I started this relationship. Even if I didn't believe it I would've at least been aware of it and probably been more open to the obvious signs. What do you guys think? Is there any point to warning people ie. making a public Facebook post about this guy? Or will that just make me come across as grade A crazy? I mean... how do you stop these toxic fucks? I feel like simply moving on is like burying Jumanji and letting some other poor sap deal with the curse. Doesn't really seem fair. TL;DR:

r/AskReddit TITLE: Reddit, please give me some reasons not to fuck some kid up POST: I'll try to make this short and clear: My best friend (male, let's call him A) is out of town and will be for another week. His little sister (B) has been going through a shitty on-again, off-again relationship. She just got a ton of super hateful texts from her ex detailing how he's been cheating on her, using her, and just fucking her up in general. Now my other best friend (female, let's call her C) is calling on me to come with her and beat the shit out of this dude. He's younger than me, but over 18. I'm not some alpha tough guy. I can handle myself in a fight, but don't unless I absolutely have to. What are some reasons I can give C to dissuade her (and myself) from doing shit that, I feel, will inevitably cause lots of problems? TL;DR: