Question: how do you know when you're ready to have a baby?
Answer: You love TV as much as you love going out. ... 
You have witnessed a tantrum and it didn't make you run for the closest condom. ... 
You don't mind drinking alone. ... 
You have shown your breasts to everyone who needs to see them. ... 
You don't mind sharing. ... 
Bodily fluid is not that disgusting to you.