thegoodfellas/blogset-br huggingface dataset:
to be alone we only have to give...That in order to give, we have to receive before...That to be given, we also have to know how to ask...That giving oneself as a present definitively is not to love oneself...That to be loved we must show what we are...That so that someone can be, they have to be helped...That help is to encourage and support...That adulation is not support...That fawning is as pernicious as to turn the face...That things face to face are honest...That nobody is honest because they do not steal...That when there is no pleasure in things you're not living...That to feel life one must not forget that there is death...That one can be a living death...That we feel with the body and the mind...That we listen with our ears...That it is hard to be sensitive and not be hurt...That being hurt is not to bleed to death...That so as not to be hurt we build walls ...That it would be better to build bridges...That across them we go to the other side and no one returns...That returning does not mean stepping back...That stepping back may also be to go forward...That despite going forward and forward, we do not wake up closer to the sun...How to let you know that that nobody lays down rules, apart from life?
It is 3 pm and I can't sleep. Even the book and the wine could not make me sleep. So, let's (try to) write a little bit.I am thinking a lot about an statement: "Stay true to yourself". In other version, "Be faithful to yourself".I tried to think if there was any difference between being true and being faithful. I still can't answer this, but I would like to discuss a bit about ethics, about be yourself and about values.Today, I was discusing with some physicist friends about ethics in the job. This "academic world" exerts a lot of pressure on us. We have to publish a lot of papers, being too much competitive, but, sometimes, there are somethings that did not go well on research. In few minutes, appears that "friend" saying: "oh, I saw you did not publish nothing this semester, but I know you need the grant for the project, so I will put you name in my paper and it is ok. One day you can do it for me!"Seriously, I still do not know if my opinion is pretty much strict about it or if I have no idea about networking but, don't you think this is wrong? If you did not participate in a project/work, why do you need to have your name in the paper? And worse, you're kind of owing a favor to someone!In life and relationships there are some similiar behaviors. How many times we are not sincere with ourselves? What is the problem in say "I don't want to taste marijuana cause I think it is not good for me" or "I don't like samba/funk/pagode. I like you, but I want to stay at home tonight" or still "No, what you said did not hurt me and I'm totally ok"?Ok, you can argue people are not ready to listen the truth, and you are right. But what about the lies we tell to ourselves? What about our values? What about being sincere with ourselves?I think when you don't have pressure it is not difficult to make a decision, to tell the truth, say what you really think about a subject. The point is this fucking social pressure. This stuff makes a lot of effort to pretend what we really are.You need to be cool to be accepted by a social group. Almost everybody has this needy. But in the middle of the way, we lost ourselves. Our friendships should be exclusively by our personality, for what we are. But we pretend a lot trying to be accept by a social group and sometimes some of our basic values get lost.Yesterday, I was talking to some friends about relationships. And, yeah, this is my favorite subject. We were talking that after a betrayal people have a lot of necessity of turn it up. But in this processes they forget being faithful to themselves. We want to go to all night parties, kiss all the guys/girls in the party to prove to ourselves we are fine. And it does not matter if you never
agreeded with the idea of "kissing a lot of girls in the same night". You forget being faithful to yourself, to your values and you do everything you always hated or you thought would never do. Trying to turn it up it's also a kind of pressure. Almost everybody already did it, tried to self assert him/herself.Yesterday I discovered a perfect song for one of the most important moments of my life. It was about the end of a relationship. I could fight and try to stay with the guy, but I did not do this cause I really don't believe you need to "fight for love". These things are natural and they are good. Of course I stayed with the doubt for a while. I lost myself trying to recover my confidence. I was not true to myself many times. It was a fight every fucking day. I needed to prove to myself I did the right choice and I needed to prove to myself I could find another guy very fast. When you're someone who really believes in love and this kind of stuff, you really feel yourself disappointed. I was not faithful to my feelings, my values, what I used to believe. You can argue "it is ok, you're suffering and you just tried to get better soon" or still say "everybody needs to change". It is a point, but it does not matter. Be faithful to yourself is do something you have a great probability of not going to regret. You still can argue that thinking this way, I will not live and always do the same things. You're still right. But, don't you think there are some limits for ethical and values? Don't you think we can learn some important lessons without lost ourselves?People usually say they did not regret about their decisions. I confess there are somethings I would not like to do again. I did somethings it was not according to values I used to believe I felt some part of me dying. I felt myself being another person. This girl today it is not the same two years ago. Nobody (except our parents) tell us that the most important thing is being true to ourselves, being faithful to some values that can not be selled or negociated.I think this is good, learn some important lessons and bla, bla, bla, but everything in nature has an energy conservation law. You can have more experience, being "more mature"... but you also start to die. Your innocence starts to go away.... you always lost something.Maybe in the future, I will be the kind of professor that accepts my name in the paper or offer this kind of favor to a friend... maybe I don't mind of being another person. All I know is that I need do struggle this stuff everyday...As the song says: "Cause I'm a man, not a boy And there are things you can't avoid...You have to face them when you're not prepared to face them... And I don't know how a man decides
what's right for his own lifeIt's all a mystery"I think the most important thing is try to don't let the "real me" dies. The challenge is try to be faithful to values we spend a lot of time thinking about and that we decided it was the best for our life. Of course everybody changes and this is life... but, for me, there are somethings you can't simply don't mind about. This could be mean you're dying everyday...
Well, I will post some crazy/interesting things I would like to do in my life. If you already did one of these things, you're free to tell me about your experience. :)1) I already did it. I would like to go to Herbie Hancock's concert. I went on august 22. It was amazing!2) Go to a Floating Lantern Festival in Thailand, China or Japan, listening to "Riot of an empty street" from Kings of Convenience3) Watch to Raphael Saadiq's Concert4) Watch to Erlend Oye's concert in Italyhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2i_eEcuKw9I5) Having a dinner like this (preferable with Geovani ^_^ )6) Go to Prague during Autumn7) Go to Sakura's Festival in Japan8) Dance Butoh near to Fuji mountain9) Publish an important paper in Nature or Science magazine10) Having dinner at Eifel Tower11) Seeing my favorite Raphael's painting (L'ecole de Atenas)12) Go to those supermarkets in Marocco13) Go to Venice14) Build an school in some african village15) Take my parents to enjoy this place with me! Minha gente... quanto homem bonito nessa copa, pelo menos dos jogos que eu vi.Logo, aqui vai minha listinha de jogadores bonitoes dos jogos que eu assisti...1) Joachim Low - Tecnico da AlemanhaGente, o que e esse homem?? Quanto estilo, charme e elegancia. Ai, ai meu coracao! :)2) Niko Kovac - Tecnico da CroaciaEsse olhar... como pode ser tao lindo assim? Muito estilo da parte dele e muito charme tambem :)3) Manuel Neuer - Goleiro da AlemanhaMeninas, o que sao esses olhos... sem contar o corpao e o super sorriso dele :)4) Alizera Haghighi - Goleiro do IraE muito charme, minha gente!5) Nikika Jelavic - Atacante da Croacia Mais charme... muito charme!6) Lionel MessiA gente, ele e uma gracinha. E aquele jeito esquisitinho dele e muito fofo. Everybody Who knows me understands I am overweight, or how they call it today,a fatty girl. Who really knows me, understand that I am not stressful about itand that I try to care about my healthy.I really like something like fat pride and these stuff, however, this weekhappened something that let me angry.I joined to a community on facebookabout fatty girls, with lot of people who also joined to this community. When Istarted to look at the pictures, with those cute and motivation phrases, I wasdisappointed. The community owners posted some phrases, mixing pictures withthose cute drawings, usually, fatty girls, using the title Facts about fattygirls. I selected some of the phrases:- While some women are only bones, fatty girls offer filet mignon- Double curves, double pleasure, double seduction: fatty girls are goddesseson bed- Fatty girls dont walk, they are on a fashion parade- The kiss from a fatty girl is simple:you kissed her, you felt in love- Dont feel fatty, feel hot- Do you have tires? Of course, allthe airplanes have.Moreover, in this community had apicture with a fatty girl getting marriage with a hot guy and an impact phraselike Youre not fatty, youre hot, a sex goddess, specialized in kama sutra orwhatever.For my surprise, this publication, especially those with fatty girls pictureshad a lot of likes and shares!When I looked at all this
publications, I felt this like an offense to my intelligence,to my capacity of self knowledge and felt just like a piece of meat. I understandthat every woman has your low esteem day, for lot of reasons like beingoverweight, losing the job, the boyfriend, discussing with a friend, having abad grade, but, all this self affirmation is really necessary?And yeah, I understand that is very important to a woman feel herselfbeautiful, sexy and desired. But is this the only thing that matters? Why thisfacebook page encourages this kind of self affirmation? It looks like they are saying: yourefatty girls, but you are beautiful too. Dont feel ugly for having 200 pounds. Youre better than thoseskinny girls. You Kiss better, make better sex, do everything betterand are much more prettier than the skinny girls.Every time I read this kind of shit, I really feel myself offended. Thesegroups try to help women that feel themselves ugly because they did not have thepattern imposed and accepted by society. The magazine covers always try to showbeautiful and skinny women. They teach us that to be a beautiful girl, desiredfor the men, you need to be skinny. Men, when look at Playboy magazine alwayssee hot girls, without cellulites, no belly and, with a little help fromPhotoshop, they think the perfect woman needs to be super duper hot. Thesociety teach that to get a mans heart you need to be fucking hot and skinny,like on Playboy magazine. Everything turns around it: be accepted by a man, orhaving a sexual partner, you need be like this or like that, you need to fit apattern!I understand that all those behaviors were imposed by society. But, is reallynecessary all this sexual appeal? Is really necessary say that a fatty girl cando this or that better? Does not a woman know herself enough? Does a facebookpage know you better than yourself? It looks like, looking at the number of likesthat these pictures receive, that all this appealing is needed.A woman is muchmore than 20 pounds over or underweight. She is not a piece of meat, a garmentor a lampshade that you can choose by the model. She is more than this! She haspersonality, intelligence, mood sense, she has an occupation! She doesnt haveonly sex to offer! She can be a good companion, has an intelligent talk thatmake you talking to her during hours without thinking about sex, she can givegood advices, be a good friend and, yep, she can be super wild on bed, but thisis not all that matters!A woman that loves and knows herself, she knows her worth! She does not need topeople or facebook pages telling her she is beautiful. A reasonable woman knowswho she is! If she is over or underweight, she knows it. If she thinks she ispretty like this, it wont be needed all this self affirmation, or that somefacebook pages do it for her. If she doesnt think she is beautiful the way sheis, she will change to feel better with herself. I think the secret is toaccept yourself the way you are! If you think
youare prettier being a blond girl, so, what is the problem in paint the hair?Now, if people say you are prettier blond, but if you like to be brunette, whyare you going to paint your hair? The priority is you, is the way you feelbetter. This is self knowledge!I try to exercise this point everyday. I am overweight and I really dont caretoo much about it. I am not hypocrite saying that I go to the gym ONLYbecause of my healthy. I dont have problems in admit this is a little bitabout esthetic. I would like to have a thinner waist. And if So and so thinksI am prettier or uglier being like this? It is his/her problem! I think I wouldfeel myself prettier like this. Girls, I know that sometimes is difficult being overweight, in feel ourselvesvery ugly in some days, but, we are NOT defined only by the way we look like. Andif someone want to define you just for the way you look like, he/she is acomplete idiot and probably dont know him/herself. And, of course, you wontwant a person like this next to you!We are much more than a hot butt, big breasts, thin waists or sex goddesses. We are WOMEN. We have a life, job,personality. We are cults, intelligents. We are more than a gift Box. We arewhat is inside. And no, we dont have only sex to offer! These pictures on facebookdoesnt make any sense!If you dont feel yourselfpretty the way you are, change to feel better with yourself. If you are happylike this, if YOU think youre pretty like this, great! You dont need to donothing to be accepted by someone! (There are some special cases, but they wontbe discussed here). I watched a very interesting Latin movie called Real women have curves. It isan story about an overweight girl that wants to study in USA. One of the cutestscenes from this movie is about her first sexual relation. She and the boy aretogether and then he turns off the lights.She says: Wait, turn the lights on. I want you to see me. The boy turns thelight. She is in front of the mirror and say: See, this is what I look like.I like this scene, cause this is high self-steem.(From 1:55 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lf5apkxo1Sw)The self acceptance based in self knowledge is not something simple. I confessI still have difficult to be in this level. But this is the only way to achievea complete level of happiness with ourselves.That is it, people!
And now days go by, and I never needed you,And now days go by, and I never needed you,And I worked so hard, and I killed myself,And you broke my bones, and I sewed my soul! Today, I started translating a text I wrote around 1 year ago. It was about avery close friend that HAD a girlfriend who proposed an open relationship and,at that time, I thought the idea was really incredible, very open mind, verymodern. It is the dream of ALMOST all men. But for my friend, that was not thebest idea. He did not want to be with other girls. He just wanted to be with her.That was problem, because he knew other girl, this girl did not like the ideaof an open relationship and they felt in love. My friend and his girlfriendbroke up and he is with this other girl today.I know other kind of stories like this. You, dear reader, must be thinking whatan stupid point of view from this writer. She is making assumptions based onother peoples stories! Yes, I am, mydear reader!Ok, but the important point in everything about relationships I am learning is:every person has its own way to deal with love and relationships. There are alot of couples who cant get together without being in an open relationship. Thehistory, friends and society can show us lot of examples. If youre not interested in my opinion about it, stop here and know that each persondeals with love on his/her away. You can listen this beautiful song from "Kings of Convenience" also. But, if you are interested in my opinion, youreinvited to continue reading this text.Each personhas his way to deal with love and relationship. But there are some questions toanswer: 1) If you love someone, wouldyou like to stay with him/her? 2) If you love someone, do you want to sharehis/her with another person? I will try to talk about LOVE! For question 1, I really think if you love someone, you want to stay close tothis person. For me, love is a pure and true feeling. This is the feeling Ihave for my parents, my sister! This is true and real. And, yeah, I always thinkabout them and want to stay with them! For a partner, a lover, I think it is something similar. IFyou love him/her, you to stay close, share things. And there is plus calledsex! For question 2, it is really complicated. For example, using the example ofloving parents, I really dont care if my parents are going to visit theirfriends, for example. But I really will not like if I go from Campinas toCuritiba for two days and they say: Sorry, dear daughter, we are going to our friendshome, but you can stay at home alone or go out with your friends. You know, Icame to see them, have a good time with them, not to stay alone at home. Iwould really feel upset if it happens. I think with a partner, this is reallysimilar. You dont wanna be far away, you want to stay close. So, yeah,
you dontwant to share the time you separate to be with this person. Ok, I know it isnot objective yet. But, the point I want to say (writing in English is f*****hard) is about the feeling... this feeling of not being the priority. I would notmind if I lived with my parents and they went to visit their friends. Now, talking about a partner, there isnt any problem about him/her going outalone or with his/her friends, since you have a time for you alone. Arelationship is about company, a nice conversation, listening to some songstogether, is about watching a movie together, about cooking together, going tothe park together... For example, Im probably not the best company to a rock androll strange band concert. He could not be best company for a jazz concert, butwe can enjoy a classical music concert together. I really dont care if mypartner is going to do something with another person, since we can do things welike together too. And what about sex? Is it ok if he/she have sex with another person, since youhave time to have sex together? Another point: you like each others company,but sex is not that good. Is it ok if you and him/her go out with anotherpeople to have good sex but still being together?You, lovely reader, still reading this shit, must be thinking: what kind ofstupid questions. If youre with someone it is because everything is ok!. Ofcourse not, reader. People change. She could be the hottest girl in thecollege, but now she got some extra pounds... or he is not so interesting asbefore... people always change, for better and for worse.Look, I always thought about these questions and my point of view about it isvery strict: I dont like the idea of sharing in sex! There are lot of ways todeal with bad sex or not too interesting company. For me, the most effectiveway is a sincere conversation, but, some little strategies can really makethings better.If you cant have a conversation about literature with him, suggest watching amovie based on a book story. If he wants to talk about football and you dontlike to watch it, suggest visiting the Football museum. If she doesnt likegoing out to dance on Saturdays night, invite her to a dinner in a restaurantwith live music. If she always wears the same beige lingerie, buy her a blackor red as a gift. And... better stop here! JWell, if these strategies didnt work, the best thing is a real and sincereconversation. If things are not going well, it should be told. And the trueshould be told. Sometimes people want to make everything to stay together. But,when see your partner going out with another person starts to hurt, maybe staytogether is not the priority anymore.So, to tell about the title of this text, I really believe in this stuff calledlove and I believe it is better stay alone than sharing someone you love! (And to finish this text, I really could not write everything was in my mind,cause is fucking difficult write common ideas in English. But
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