thegoodfellas/blogset-br huggingface dataset:
Ive always known. Dont youagree?Riodancould not speak or move, so thunderstruck was he. But when Dylensmouth quirked upward in an affectionate smirk, an irresistible urgeto kiss that mouth overtook him. He suited action to thought and,leaning forward, caught Dylen in a kiss that was equal parts emotionand bodily desire.Dylensuddenly pulled him astride his lap. Their lips met again, partingand slanting against each other in a spate of blistering open-mouthedkisses. The sounds of a coach passing by drifted in through thewindow, abruptly reminding Riodan that they were in the parlor andnot the privacy of his bedchamber. He broke their kiss and touchedhis forehead to Dylens, panting as he strove to catch his breath.Perhaps...he murmured thickly. Perhaps we should continue in the bedroom.And of course closeting ourselves this early in the afternoonwont give your butlernotionsabout us, Dylen remarked with a chuckle.Betterwe leave that to his imagination than provide him with a full show!Riodan shot back. He kissed Dylen once more. I wouldnt carewere you someone else. Ive had servants walk in on me before.Wellthen, why so shy with me now?Notshy, Riodan demurred. I just dont want anyone else to get aneyeful of your charms, much less a taste of them. I never want toshare you again, Dy.Dylenblinked in surprise. He bit his lip then met Riodans gaze. Andyou havent, he quietly assured him. Not since the night Irevealed myself to Rohyr.Riodanstared at him. But I thoughtWhen you spoke of seducing Malkon,it gave me the impression that...ThatId been bedding others, Dylen finished for him. He shook hishead. Malkon wouldnt have had the full benefit of myexperience. If it had come to that, I would have found other ways,used other methods save for the coupling of our bodies, to get whatwe needed from him. Once I no longer needed to sell my services, Ibecame so selective that no one could meet my standards. And then youcame back, and my desire awakened oncemore.He reached up to run his thumb along Riodans lips. Truth betold, Rio, even when I tried to hate you, I still wanted you andbadly so.Isthat why you kept your distance? Riodan asked, his voice rough.Dylensighed. Among other things. I told you, I tried to hate you aswell. The mere sight of you was enough to undo all my efforts. Whatmore your scent, your voice, the mere brush of your hand againstmine?Riodangasped as he was suddenly stroked between his legs. He glanced downand groaned at the sight of Dylens hand on his crotch, gentlykneading the hard bulge therein. With a shuddery exhalation, hepulled away and got to his feet, drawing Dylen up as well.Bedroom,he hoarsely said. Now.Dylensoftly laughed and let him conduct him thence. Almost as soon as hekicked the door shut behind him, Riodan all but pounced on him,kissing him hard as he started to undress him. He returned the favor.Butwhen Dylen had him down to his shirt and had loosened its collar,Riodan abruptly stiffened. A deep flush heated his cheeks.Dylenpaused and looked searchingly at him. Rio?Riodangulped. I should have warned you, he said, his throat tight.My back Yes, I know.Itsjust that... Its not
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completely with her belovedsibling.Please,let us sit and eat! Reggie said. Let your lovely boyhere, a nod at Martin bring you a plate.Therewas a fire in the grate and a fitful discharge of warmer air from thefloor registers, but the room was unpleasantly cold, and Henry wishedhed put on a sweater before coming down. Henry had his coffee andMartin brought him plates of scrambled eggs with cheese, rashers ofbacon, sausage patties, oatmeal with raisins and brown sugar, andbrioche toast with jam. The coffee helped to ease the throb in hishead. While he ate, he listened to Reggie and his mother continuetheir conversation.Really,it wasnt a bad life at all, Louisa, Reggie was saying, exceptthat I missed my family so! I didnt get to see my nephews grow up,which was such a shame. He turned to Henry and said, I canttell you how sorry I am I missed that, darling. Turning back toMother, he continued, You have no idea how much I appreciated thephotos you sent, Louisa! Just those glimpses of Henry growing were soprecious to me.Henryhad not realized his mother had been in contact with Uncle Reggieduring his exile, much less sending him photographs, and was a bitupset that shed never let him know that Reggie cared about him,that Reggie hadnt willingly abandoned him, but he tried not to letthe anger take hold. In her state, Mother couldnt really be heldresponsible for much of anything.Mothercleared her throat and put her hand on Reggies arm. I knew howmuch you loved him, she said. I didnt want you to forgethim.Howcould you think Id forget the child of my beloved sister? WhileHenry ate, Reggie continued to fawn over her, offering encouragementsand blandishments, and Mother seemed to love the attention. Henrysent Martin back to the buffet for more food while the adults talked.Ihad a nice life with Frederick, Reggie told Mother. He wasterribly kind, you know, and so generous. He didnt have very muchby the end, admittedly, but he left it all to me.Motherfrowned. I always thought you could have done better, Reggie.Someone your own age, maybe. Wasnt there anyone...?Wewere very compatible, Reggie said gently. He always told me Iwas an old soulisnt that nice?Idont know if its nice or not, Mother said primly. I dontknow what that means.Reggiepatted her hand. It just means he thought I was wise in my ownway, Louisa. He saw things in me that no one else ever didnot evenyou. He turned his attention to Henry. My friend, FrederickMr.Ellsworthwould have loved you, Henry. He so liked to be aroundyoung people. We were forever having dinner parties, and we had asort of salondes artisteswith our house full of painters and poets all year round.Thatsounds nice, Henry said to be polite, though in truth the scenariosounded a little intimidating. I imagine Jesse would have fitright in.Youdboth have loved it, Reggie said firmly. I would have made sureyou did. He ate a few bites of food, wiped his lips with hisnapkin, and said, Speaking of your cousin, did he tell you abouthis little romance with that girl in Chicago?Elizabeth?Yes,thats the one! Did he show you his
toHenry, but regular gentlemen often married ladies who were a greatdeal younger, so perhaps Reggies situation wasnt so odd. HadMr. Ellsworth been Reggies lover, then? Reggie had all but saidso, and Henry did assume this was the case, and yet there was no wayhe might possibly ask. And if Mr. Ellsworth had been Reggieslover, then where did that leave Benjamin during all those years inItaly?Henryopened his mouth to ask a question, but found himself unable toformulate one that social conventions would allow.Reggiewas looking from Henrys face to Martins and back again andbrought his hands together in a single excited clap. Oh, yourejust so delicious, the both of you, so young and beautiful! Youshould have your portrait done. If only we were in Italy! I knowenough artists there to paint you ten times over! Theyd all beclamoring to do it! He turned to Mother, excited and eager.Louisa, dont you think they should have their portraitpainted?Motherseemed less enthusiastic. I can tell you, Reggie, that Hiram wouldthink it very decadent.Surely,Hiram isnt entirelyopposed to decadence, Reggie said, spreading his arms wide. Lookat this house!But,really, where would we hang a painting of our son and hisslave?Mother scoffed. Reggie, darling, youve become so ridiculouslybohemian!Reggiewaved a dismissive hand in her direction, then leaned across thetable toward Henry. Well, at least get a photograph, darling, sothat when youre an old man like me, you can look at it andremember what it was like to be so nearly perfect.Reggieand Benjy were only in their mid-thirties and were both agingextremely well, so Henry didnt know what Reggie was complainingabout. Did you do that? Get a photograph?Oh,no, darling, we had an amazing painting done, naked as the day wewere born! Ive always been friendly with artists, you see, andartists always need models. Of course, it makes me blush to look atit now! I keep it in a closet under a sheet. When I bring it back tothe city, I mightbe brave enough to show it to you after Ive had a little wine!Henrydid want to see this painting, but was too embarrassed to say so. Helooked down at the tablecloth and blushed again.Reggiesmiled at him, head cocked. You were such a bashful little boy,and I wondered if it would stay with you, and of course I see that ithas. Im sure you dont appreciate it, but I do think it socharming.Imafraid Ill have to disagree, Uncle. Henry gave him a quick,rueful smile. Its always very inconvenient.Benjaminstepped forward again and leaned over to whisper in Reggies ear.Oh,really? Already? Thank you, Benjy. Reggie smiled at Henry, thenMother, and took Mothers hand. Darlings, I have to go. Immeeting with some of my old, oldfriends, people who knew me way back when. I have a lot of catchingup to do!Sosoon, Reggie? Mother seemed instantly bereft. But when will Isee you again?Youknow I dont want to antagonize Hiram by coming round too often,Louisa, darling. But you can come see me any time. Gilbert andVirginia would love to see you more often, and I know Jesse wants toknow his cousin better. All of this socializing is happening becauseIm freshly
to want each other so much?Henryturned his head to see Martin looking at him, asking quite seriously.No,Henry told him. I dont think its normal at all. I think itsextraordinary.He picked Martins hand up from the bedcover and brought it to hislips.Theway I feel... Martin began. I keep thinking, Henry, that if youever stopped wanting to make love to me, Id die.Iwont let you die, Henry promised. He kissed Martins handagain and then tugged, reeling him in to be held close.Martinsnext words were muffled against Henrys neck. I keep thinkingabout your uncle, about Benjamin, really, and how difficult it musthave been for him when Mr. Wilton was with Mr. Ellsworth all thoseyears. Ive always known it would happen, but today it seems morereal. Someday youll be with someone else, and Ill have to standby and let it happen.Henrythought this unlikely. He would get out of a marriage somehow. Doyou think Reggie and Benjamin are like us, then?Oh,I dont know, Henry. Martin looked away, frowning. Maybe Imjust feeling sorry for myself.Idont want to be with anyone else, Henry insisted. Theresnot going to be any Mr. Ellsworth coming between us. Or MissEllsworth, for that matter.Somehow,I think I could stand a woman, Martin said, as if Henry hadnttried to reassure him at all. Youll have to take a wife, I knowthat, but if you were to become involved with another free man...Idbe devastated, I admit it.Yourebeing so morbid, Henry chastised him gently. Youre all Ithink about, Martin. Dont you know that?Imonly your slave. I dont have any claim on you.Inmy heart you do, Martin. Remember? Inmy heart.Itwas as close to a declaration of love as Henry dared to come, and itdid seem to brighten Martins mood. They spent the rest of the daypracticing and studying, Martin with violin and Henry with Latin,belatedly working on the exercises hed intended to complete at thebeginning of the winter break. He made a valiant effort, butultimately gave these to Martin to finish.Atdinner, Father did make an appearance, and Henry wondered, but didnot ask, if Father knew about Reggies breakfast visit. Motherseemed indifferent to Father yet overall improved, surely as a resultof her brothers visit.Upin the parlor, Cora came to give everyone a kiss for New Years andonce again lavished the greatest part of her affection on Martin.Henry worried that Father might object to this unseemly attachmentand spoil it for Cora and Martin both, but instead he seemed in amood to find his daughters crush amusing. After Cora was takenaway, Pearl read to them from a new book, TheGhost of Hedgecombe Manor,another story that seemed unlikely to feature wayward masters orheaving bosoms, for which Henry was truly grateful. The new year wasoff to a successful start.Theirfirst day back in class after the holiday break, Father was delayedby an urgent call at home, and so Henry was late getting to school,with just time enough to leave his coat in the cloakroom before hehad to hurry to class, getting to his seat right before the bell.Boys were cutting their eyes at him as he took his seat, and he beganto feel uncomfortably self-conscious.
He had not spoken with Louis oranyone else since New Years Eve, and it only now occurred to himthere might be repercussions to his having left Charles Ross partyunder a cloud. There was a sibilant undercurrent of whispersthroughout the room, and notes were being passed surreptitiously,though none came his way. Had he been judged and condemned inabsentia? He tried to tell himself hed done nothing wrong at theparty, nothing unusual, but he could not convince himself.WhileMr. Cobb had his back to the class, Albert leaned across the aisleand whispered, Did you hear about Adam? He darted a glance inAdam's direction and Henry followed his eye. Adam was very red in theface and looked both defiant and ashamed.No.Henry shook his head. What happened? Whats going on? He wasflooded with relief to find he was not the topic under discussionafter all. He would be very happy to listen to gossip about Adam.Afterclass, Albert mouthed.Curious,Henry turned to Albert immediately at the class break, and Louisclimbed over a desk to join them.Haveyou heard? Louis asked. Did you hear what happened to Sam?Iwas just going to tell him, Albert said, annoyed. So, listen,Henry, Adam's Sam is dead.Henrywas shocked. He said the first thing that came to mind. Did Adamkill him?Hekilled himself! Louis blurted, getting a sharp look from Albert.He cut his wrists in the bathtub and Adam's little sister foundhim.Henryfelt terrible. Poor little Sam hadn't deserved any of the tormentAdam had put him through. Martin would be upset, Henry knew, him andall of the other slaves.Heleft a letter for Adam's father,Louis continued. Telling him all the horrible things Adam did!Poor little guy! He always seemed pretty unhappy.Henrywould not see Martin until lunch, of course, but he thought of himall morning, knowing that he and all of the other slaves would begrieving. When Henry saw him at lunch, waiting behind Henryschair, it was clear he had been crying, but he could not go to himand comfort him as he would have liked. He tried to telegraph hissympathies with his eyes, with a sad smile, but he couldnt be moredemonstrative in front of the others. There was nothing to be doneexcept sit down and eat. He dropped his napkin so that Martin couldcome close and was able to squeeze his hand for just an instant;Martin made a soft, sorrowful sound and pulled his fingers backhurriedly.Henryhad heard of slaves killing themselves before, but always in ratherromantic terms. Stories circulatedlegends, perhapsof devotedslaves committing suicide after the deaths of their masters. Hedheard of the aberrant obverse, too: masters who didnt want to liveafter the death of a slave. Henry, who felt pangs of desperate horrorat the thought of Martin ever dying, believed he could understandsuch impulses. But this was entirely different. Sam, who had beentrained to put up with almost anything a master could think of, hadbeen pushed to the brink and beyond.Becauseit was cold and raining, no one wanted to go out in the yard afterlunch, so boys went to the library or loitered in the halls. Henrywent to the library with his friends, Martin behind him on the stair,and he
him off with a sharpshake of his head.Thankyou, Sir. I appreciate it. He helped Henry on with his overcoatand handed him his hat.Theywalked to the omnibus with Louis and Peter. While they waited,Freddie, Wendell, Albert, Robert and Charles joined them, and theyall talked about Adam and what his punishment oughtto be, while all of their slaves presumably talked about their deadfriend. Henry tried to overhear what the slaves were saying to eachother, but their voices were too low, and he couldnt move anycloser to the group without being obvious.Bythe time they boarded the omnibus, Henrys friends had moved on toother topics. Charles was complimenting Freddie on what a good sportTom had been at the New Years party.Iimagine hes still sore, Charles said, elbowing Freddie, whoonly laughed in answer.Embarrassed,Henry tried to ignore the swap talk, but he was in no better positionto hear what the slaves said to one another now than he had been outon the sidewalk. For once, Martin wasnt standing close by, butstood in the midst of his friends, and their group had been pushed afew feet further down the aisle by people boarding the omnibus. Whenat last they reached their stop, Martin and Peter both had tostruggle through the crowded aisle to catch up to their masters, andLouis was annoyed.Iknow youre distracted, he said, but your job is to stay withme, isnt it?Peterducked his head, his cheeks pink. Yes, Sir. Of course, Sir.Louiswas talking and talking, but Henry wasnt paying attention; Martinand Peter spoke in low voices at his back, and he strained to hearwhat they said.Areyou even listening? Louis demanded.What?Sorry, Henry said, blushing. I'm, uh, just thinking about thealgebra test.Louislooked at him quizzically. Why are youworried about math?Henryshrugged. I don't know. They were at the Blackwell gate. Seeyou tomorrow?Atlast he was alone with Martin. He turned to him at the gate and put ahand on his shoulder. Martin, I cant tell you how sorry I amabout Sam.Thankyou, Sir. Martin bit his lip. May we go inside? I'm afraid I'llcry again.Yes,of course. What am I thinking?Theywent inside, gave their coats to Paul, and went up to Henry's room.With the door shut behind them, Henry took Martin in his arms andheld him while his shoulders shook. Martin cried quietly butcopiously, his tears soaking the shoulder of Henry's school jacket.Imso sorry, Martin. Henry kissed his hair, smoothed it with hishand, and cupped the back of his head. I wish I could have helpedhim; you know that, dont you?Iknow, Henry, Martin said in a small, muffled voice. I know youtried. He wrapped his arms tighter around Henrys waist. Willyou lie down with me? Id like it if youd hold me.Theyshed their school jackets and boots and stretched out on the bed.Martin took the tie from his hair and put his glasses on thenightstand, then made himself small against Henrys chest. He tooka few shuddering breaths before relaxing into Henrys embrace.Imso lucky you took me, Henry. If hed taken me at auctionHecouldnt have, Henry insisted. You were always meant for me.Martingave a wet sniff and petted Henrys shoulder. Can I talk alittle about
Sam? I know you didnt have a chance to know him whilehe was alive, but Id like to tell you some things now, if thatsall right.Yes,of course.Eventhough he was so little and boyish, Sam was the oldest of us, did yourealize? He was a VirgoWhatdoes that mean?Hisbirthday was in September, and it meant he was very tidy and precise.He liked things just so, and was very eager to serve and makeeverything perfect for a master. He always did his best for Mr.Pettibone, and even though Mr. Pettibone never praised him, I like tothink that he couldnt help but notice what a good job Sam did forhim.Henever praised him at all? Henry drew back to look down intoMartins face. Never?Notreally, Henry. Mr. Pettibone is a terrible master. But I dont wantto talk about him;I want to talk about Sam.Please,tell me more.Weall liked him. Even Daveywho used to pick on him a little, if youremembereven Davey liked him after all. He was naturally already abit timid, and he became more so, but he could be very funny. RayMr.Blankenships Raymondwas his best friend, and they made eachother laugh all the time.Itwas hard to imagine haggard little Sam laughing at anything. But allHenry said was, Im glad he had someone to laugh with, atleast.Hewrote beautiful poetry, but he was too shy to read it aloud, so Raydid it for him. He could make things out of folded paperbirds andboats and crowns and all kinds of things. He made them foreveryoneIll have to show you mine.Iwant to see them. Henry rubbed Martins back.Mr.Pettibone found Sams talismans and threw them awayHedidnt! Henry felt his stomach drop, imagining how upset Sammust have been.Yes,he threw them out. Looking at Martins face, he was obviouslystill very angry over this. So we all had to find some normalthing that Sam could hide in plain sight, you see.Whatdid you do?Wetied knots. Knots make connections, so we tried to tie ourselves toSam that way. Theres a book with diagrams of knots in the libraryat school, so we tried all different types. He could have a littlepiece of thread in his pocket with a knot in it, you see, and Mr.Pettibone would never guess it was anything more than lint.Thatwas clever, Henry noted.Ofcourse, it didnt work,Im well aware of that, but I know it made him feel better that wecared. Martins voice broke and he pressed his face againstHenrys shirtfront.Shh,its all right. Henry stroked Martins hair and kissed the topof his head. Martins breath was hot and moist through the cottonof Henrys shirt and he clung fiercely to Henry, his arm tightaround Henrys back.Martinrelinquished his grip on Henrys body and tilted his head to lookup at Henry. Will you kiss me, please?Henrykissed him, and Martins mouth was molten, his lips plush. Hesighed into Henrys mouth and touched the side of Henrys face,his fingertips trembling points of warmth along Henrys jaw. Henrynipped at his lip and Martin gasped and went still, and then Henryrealized he was crying.Martin?Hehad a boy he loved at Apollo, Martin said, his voice quavering.So at least he had love once. Thats important,