and Gwendolen.]Lady Bracknell. Good afternoon, dear Algernon, Ihope you are behaving very well.Algernon. I'm feeling very well, AuntAugusta.Lady Bracknell. That's not quite the same thing.In fact the two things rarely go together.[Sees Jack and bows to himwith icy coldness.] p.459Algernon. [[To Gwendolen.]]Dear me, you are smart!Gwendolen. I am always smart! Aren't I, Mr.Worthing?Jack. You're quite perfect, MissFairfax.Gwendolen. Oh! I hope I am not that. Itwould leave no room for developments, and I intend to develop in manydirections.[Gwendolen and Jack sit downtogether in the corner.]Lady Bracknell. I'm sorry if we are a littlelate, Algernon, but I was obliged to call on dear Lady Harbury. I hadn't beenthere since her poor husband's death. I never saw a woman so altered; she looksquite twenty years younger. And now I'll have a cup of tea, and one of thosenice cucumber sandwiches you promised me.Algernon. Certainly, Aunt Augusta.[Goes over to tea-table.]Lady Bracknell. Won't you come and sit here,Gwendolen?Gwendolen. Thanks, Mamma, I'm quitecomfortable where I am.Algernon. [[Picking up empty plate inhorror.]] Good heavens! Lane! Why are there no cucumbersandwiches? I ordered them specially.Lane. [[Gravely.]]There were no cucumbers in the market this morning, sir. I went down twice.Algernon. No cucumbers!Lane. No, sir. Not even for readymoney.Algernon. That will do, Lane, thank you.Lane. Thank you, sir.Algernon. I am greatly distressed, AuntAugusta, about there being no cucumbers, not even for ready money.Lady Bracknell. It really makes no matter,Algernon. I had some crumpets with Lady Harbury, who seems to me to be livingentirely for pleasure now.Algernon. I hear her hair has turned quitegold from grief.Lady Bracknell. It certainly has changed itscolour. From what cause I, of course, cannot say. [[Algernon crosses and handstea.]] Thank you. I've quite a treat for you to-night, Algernon. Iam going to send you down with Mary Farquhar. She is such a nice woman, and soattentive to her husband. It's delightful to watch them.Algernon. I am afraid, Aunt Augusta, Ishall have to give up the pleasure of dining with you to-night after all.Lady Bracknell. [[Frowning.]] Ihope not, Algernon. It would put my p.460table completely out. Your unclewould have to dine upstairs. Fortunately he is accustomed to that. Algernon. It is a great bore, and, I needhardly say, a terrible disappointment to me, but the fact is I have just had atelegram to say that my poor friend Bunbury is very ill again. [[Exchangesglances with Jack.]] They seem to think I should be with him.Lady Bracknell. It is very strange. This Mr.Bunbury seems to suffer from curiously bad health.Algernon. Yes; poor Bunbury is a dreadfulinvalid.Lady Bracknell. Well, I must say, Algernon, thatI think it is high time that Mr. Bunbury made up his mind whether he was goingto live or to die. This shilly-shallying with the question is absurd. Nor do Iin any way approve of the modern sympathy with invalids. I consider it morbid.Illness of any kind is hardly a thing to be encouraged in others. Health is theprimary duty of life. I am always telling that to your poor uncle, but he neverseems to take much notice . . . as far as any improvement in his