text
stringlengths
29
5.29k
My sister loved to swim; me, I was partial to rock skipping. If I'd only had better aim, she might not have drowned
As we explored the haunted castle, we came upon a portrait of the king's most notorious executioner, Antaeus the Bull, and in the next room- we found his actual axe on display. As we again passed the executioner's intimidating portrait, I noticed that Antaeus was looking at us with a devilish grin, and that's when we all heard something heavy and metallic being drug across the stone in the other room.
I told her anxiety is normal for a first date, I told her feeling her heart beat in her chest is normal for a first date, I told her feeling a bit dizzy and silly was normal for a first date HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW, ITS NOT MY FAULT ITS NOT MY FAULT SHES DEAD, HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THOSE ARE SYMPTOMS OF CARDIAC ARREST
After I was sentenced to death, I prayed my Greek enemies would choose a speedy method for my execution. But as the soldiers lead me to my fate, I saw the bull gleaming in the sun, and I began to weep.
It kept looking at me in the closet. It’s wearing the cut off face of my mother.
We opened our scripture books and began to read out loud, in unison: “We slept in what had once been the gymnasium.”
A year and a half through the apocalypse, I cried endlessly when I saw my daughter bleeding to death. I held her pregnant belly that bore our child who was the last hope of humanity.
When our pastor stated "The Rapture has come and we are saved," I was distraught as I thought we were "left behind." It wasn't until he drew our attention to the handguns beneath our pews and he put a bullet in his head did we understand what we were meant to do.
"Bullseye!" - thought the marksman, when the enemy soldier fell down in the field and began screaming in pain, clutching his shattered pelvis. He could already see his squadmates breaking cover to save their wounded comrade, and loaded another bullet in the chamber.
I tried to call the police to help me escape the box the kidnappers put me in But when I heard a phone ringing from outside the box I realized no one was going to help me
"They seem to think the killer can turn into wind, and that's how he gets in when the windows are shut and the doors are locked," he said. When I tell him my theory that the killer knew all the victims and was let in, he suddenly offered to come over tonight.
She thought herself foolish for being a grown ass woman with a nagging fear of monsters under her bed. Imagine her surprised when her possessive ex crawled out from under his hiding place to prove her wrong.
You know the saying, "The tree remembers, the axe forgets"? In this case, the axe remembers *fondly.*
The pain killers helped after I found out my husband and doctor secretly gave me a husband stitch after the birth of my first child. The pills knocked them both right out and I used the needle and thread to sew their own stitches into their urethras'.
My psychiatrist was going to have me put in a ward. Until the voices told him to put the phone down.
I saw what I would get my mom for dinner on Mother's Day. As I licked my fangs while hiding in the brush, I counted the passengers inside the broken down 4×4, delighted to see tourists stranded on their safari.
When the AI that took over the world spared me, I felt ecstatic. Now, after 109 years of constant torture, I know it wasn't a blessing.
As I walked my dog along the moonlit river, I froze at the sight of a figure heaving something heavy into the rushing waters. His cold stare locked with mine, a silent promise that the river would claim one more secret tonight.
"How?" Staring between a frail old woman and her driving license The license was assigned just the other week, but her picture looks decades younger
Li lay pinned to the floor of the store room, fatally crushed by fallen shelves and cursing herself for taking in that last delivery after all the other restaurant staff had gone home. Her consciousness fading, Li grasped for the cookie wrapper beside her and tore it open with her teeth, reading its fortune through bleary eyes: "There is no such thing as bad luck, only bad timing."
The orphanage was renowned throughout the city as being unquestionably the best, providing the finest facilities, most caring staff, and even free schooling to any child in need. Which is why government officials would always turn a blind eye when one of them would go missing from within its walls.
It’s hard posting something that doesn’t break any of the rules. The demon torturing me doesn’t care how hard it is, only that I do it.
"Don't worry this thing can run even with just one engine" The villain said as the human crushers slowly started breaking my toes
I kept a close eye on the stormclouds, in case a tornado started to form. And with every lightning flash, I saw the swirling, writhing mass in the clouds grow larger.
Always willing to grab the bull by the horns, I volunteered to mount a risky expedition to get the much-needed supplies for my group. As I cower in this abandoned service station, the howling of the frigid wind mingling in the air with that of my pursuer, I pray that hypothermia takes me before they find my hiding place.
Were they blue Jays or magpies above? Quite beautiful either way I thought until they dove into my eyes.
When I became a horse I was so impressed at my ability to run very quickly and my massive size it felt like I was a big american pickup truck I was almost too excited until I fell from running too fast and broke my leg
She hoped this sacrifice would please the gods while sliding the blade across her own throat. The pastor assured her it was the only way for still borns to make it through the gates of heaven un-baptized.
After his wild success in his latest horror film, the charming actor was interviewed on how he portrayed his murders so convincingly, to which he replied with a sly grin: “Method acting.”
"Last time, daddy beat me up because I accidentally paid the store clerk more, but this time I will count properly," I thought to myself. I reached into my pocket to get the money, but found nothing but a hole.
On a beautiful beach and under the screeching cries of flying seagulls, he picked up the creamy white soft serve left on the bench, wondering why someone would just leave it there. After taking a large bite he realized, and looked up at the circling seagulls.
Sailing the open seas makes you accommodated to strange sights. But this is the third crew member who’s eyes have become pure white with an X shaped pupil and I’m beginning to wonder if it really is a hallucination
During the maintenance and observation of the elephants foot chamber at Chernobyl it seemed as if the hulking mass of molten debris and radiation is finally starting to wither away. Unfortunately for our researchers and clean up crew, the mass had now sunk into the ground and just touched the flowing water under the Earth.
After pulling for what seemed like ages the 2-foot worm finally popped out Now I just need to figure out what to do about the quivering clutch of eggs it left behind my eye.
I sat in the hospital and tried to focus on the rhythmic beeping of my infant sons heart as I ignored my crazy mother's ranting about government conspiracies. But when I came back later, I heard only silence as my mother smiled and said she unplugged some things to prevent the 5G radiation from spreading.
I have prepared an airtight bunker, loaded with supplies for each and every apocalyptic scenario I could think of. For the present apocalypse, my "supplies" consists of a single box, containing a revolver and one bullet.
They were my friends, like family- and I saw them every day whether it was at work, at the bar, or just hanging out watching a holo or something. They've still got the same faces as they roam the halls, shrieking coagulated blood out of their decayed throats as they search for another squealing meal, but the family they're building now is built off death.
This morning, i turn on the news to see the police chief bragging about finally catching the serial killer that's been active in the city. "What a load of bullshit" I exclaim while turning off the TV with a chuckle, before beginning to look for my next victim.
For an eon I could not speak, and so my pain and fear were given hollow comfort, mocked, or otherwise abandoned in the darkness and ignored. I don't care what kind of scientific advancements the Department of Energy is making (or how much they want me to shut up): after a single one-hour session in the Natal-Natant Restricted Environmental Stimulation (N2REST) pod, I encourage everyone to CONTINUE forgetting their memories from when they were babies.
After what that man took from me and so many others, there's nothing I can take from him that's enough to avenge it. But we'll settle for the small satisfaction of taking off a little at a time for as long as he lasts.
When I woke up I thought I was in Heaven. Until I felt the heat and realized I was in hell.
I knew that my burst appendix could kill me if not taken care of. My hands are stained a crimson as deep as that on the floors, and I can barely see from the pain, but I was able to do what I could never afford.
I love my sick son and refuse to let his father take him to those satanic people at the clinic. His skin isn't THAT yellow and will get better on its own with my love and prayers. <3
"Sorry ol' chap, you gave my wife and I many years of loyal service, but we don't need a bull anymore," the farmer said as he readied his bolt gun. "My wife said she'd like to be monogamous again, and well, we did have one last fantasy to share with you before we part ways for good," he grinned, approaching the gagged and bound man as they tried and failed to scream.
I giggled as the old, warm-hued lights in the room made my skin look yellow. Why does it still look yellow after I've left?
A person found out that when they die, they would possess another person from the day before. The next day, all of humanity went extinct.
I struggled to fall back asleep in the car cause my mom was swerving all over the place. I looked out the window to see the commotion and noticed all the cars going in the opposite direction.
For my final wish, I wish to communicate with any living thing! As the man screamed in pain the genie left, never once mentioning the trillions of bacteria.
Do you remember that shitty faggot from work-the boss? Waiting for the usual gossip, I didn't expect to hear how he killed himself and was found with a bullet between the eyes by his 2 yo son, nor my friends reaction who was almost crying from the laughter.
"Mommy?", I called out through the silent house, the silent street, the silent neighborhood. "But I'm hungry", the four year old girl whined quietly to herself, half in tears.
Every morning, i check the obituaries on the newspapers and the bulletins. After all, i am the one that makes sure they don't run out of stuff to write about.
I was only cleaning our house But then,they all fell dead on the floor,choking on the air that I had made.
With no other choice I hastily blocked the door, tied a rope around my neck and stepped off the stool. As I choke, the infected tear down my sloppy barricade and rip me apart, making my efforts futile.
The waves crashed violently around my head, smothering me and I was submerged over and over, gasping for air. Finally, my son stopped struggling and thrashing as the water in the tub became calm and I took my hands from his throat.
I swear i can feel eyes staring at me every time i go into my basement. I really have to make sure the blindfolds sit properly the next time.
Her mother had always criticised her weight calling her among other things ‘muffin top Melissa.’ Sobbing, she huddled in the wreckage of the crashed plane, knowing it was gods punishment that she’d have to cannibalise her daughter’s flank to stay alive.
“I finally reached someone and sold them a car warranty!” shouted the telemarketer gleefully, jumping up from their tiny cubicle. “Good job, now get me another soul”, smiled the demon overseeing the call center deep in the bowels of Hell.
As soon as the priest limped out of the room, the woman accosted him and demanded, “So did you get it out of him?” He looked sorrowfully at the purpling bruises on her face before replying, “I’m so sorry, but I could find no demon in your husband.”
The being in the mirror mimicked me perfectly. I knew from my time there if it didn't the things that lurked behind would come for it.
Don't worry about my husband, he'll never find out. Help me with this shovel real quick, love.
As he was reaching his final breath in his death bed he started hearing a screeching watery noise after that he saw his cockroach legs unfolding within a myriad of them.
Waking to find her head slumped against the wall in the toilet a full hour after the Big Meeting had ended, Cindy cursed her narcolepsy for the thousandth time. Opening the door sheepishly, her feelings of embarrassment and frustration turned quickly to dread as she found the office deserted and a bloody warning scrawled across the bulletin board: *RUN*.
After promising test results, doing surgery under hypnosis was scheduled to be adopted as 2024 rolled into 2025. ‘5, 4, 3, 2, 1,’ the sounds of the revellers were heard outside the inner city hospitals, and all the patients in the trance state suddenly awoke to find their flesh cut open.
The tension had been rising for days, and it seemed like declaration of war was imminent It was only when the cosmonaut was on a space walk, making repairs to the fuselage of the ISS, he saw the astronaut make the sign of the cross and sever all communications.
I heard someone say a curse word for the first time and it was completely valid. “What the fuck dude!” As a man looks from his brother’s corpse to the gun in my hand.
When I opened the chest, I thought that I’d find gold. Only to realize that a tiny monster lived inside.
I enjoy my kids telling me how their day was. Sometimes I tell them it’s too bad the planchette I’m moving has no tone.
I summoned the spirits of those who had died at the battle site. They looked just like their bodies had right at the moment of death.
My ex has a profile on one of those judgment free kink apps where people talk about meeting up to role play being forced. But she doesn’t know about it.
It's when my employer refused to give a day off to grieve the dead dog saying " It's just a damn dog " I wanted to get back at him I looked into his teary eyes and said " It's just a damn child "
We are currently renovating our house, and my son is having so much fun looking at all the tools and inside the walls "Daddy, the cotton candy doesn't taste very good."
I bulldoze down the lonely tree every evening And every morning it has grown back again, its bark blacker, its branches longer.
Working as a janitor at the morgue was fun. But nothing beats my new job gardening for the foster home.
It wasn’t until I killed his wife in front of him and he effortlessly broke free from the several-metric-ton heavy trap, that I realized something. He had been holding back this whole time and now, he was coming for me.
The pain in my back was finally relieved after years of agony. A split second later, I realized my neck didn't break.
On a bad side I watched my broken tire hang from the tree On the good size my cat tire wasn't meowing anymore
I smiled at my lover, happy at how good he had treated me for the few months we were together. He was just like his father.
We’re exploring an unknown branch of the city’s cave system to conduct a survey when we stumble upon a vast bottomless abyss. As we direct our flashlights upwards, we notice hundreds of pile foundations jutting from the ceiling.
It was a picture of me sleeping, taken from my phone last night The note said "I coexist with you in your mind. Do exactly as I say or it'll be a picture of your amputated finger next time"
When I regained consciousness, other than the blindfold, the first thing I noticed was the taste of blood in my mouth. As the scorching liquid poured out of what felt like a tube, my throat began to clog up and burn as I realized it wasn't blood.
Police discovered the preserved remains of more than 100 victims of a previously unknown serial killer, the victims had been force fed paint until they asphyxiated. The only clue the police have to possibly help them identify the killer is a message written on the wall of the storage unit, "There are no mistakes, just happy accidents"
Storms always remind me how difficult living on your own can be. Especially the figures around my bed whenever the lightning flashes.
I cried with joy when I saw my bed ridden wife running towards me for an embrace As we hit the floor and she buried her face into my shoulder, I was confused why she was trying to bite through my jacket...
I slip the ring onto her finger, gazing into her watery eyes as my own overflow with joyful tears. I can’t help but admire how beautifully the golden band pairs with the silver cuffs and chains bolting her to my basement floor.
My brother rarely uses social media and recently got a "dumb phone" and brags about being "unplugged". The police found most of his victims but he's still at large.
Sometimes, while I’m driving on the freeway I enjoy the thrill of closing my eyes and counting Mississippi's in an attempt to beat my wife’s record of 25 seconds. I’ve yet to beat it, but tonight, in an attempt to pay tribute to her and our infant daughter on their one-year anniversary, the twin and I are determined to hit the 25-second mark.
"Daddy, what's that big green thing there?" asked my four-year-old, poking the picture book. "That's a tree, sweetie," I say, almost crying while remembering when we still had those.
The important thing now is to free your mind. Though if it were still possible I'd advise you to focus on freeing your body.
Amidst the never-ending party goers outside my university dorm, I keep trying to cover my ears and fall asleep. An unknown voice whispers into both of my ears, “Sleep well,” and the loud house music and drunk yelling abruptly turn to sharp static and screams, then silence.
He liked to indulge his violent urges when lucid dreaming, letting his imagination run wild for the gory murder spree that would rid him of responsibilities. When he woke up this morning, however, his clothes were soaked in gore and viscera and his hands were stained with dried, crusty brown blood - oh shit.
"How could I've known..." The priest muttered as light became a blindly hot fire. "That I was exorcising an archangel."
The Can-Can man is a handsome man, with teeth quite large and clean. When he takes you gently by the hand, run… before he feasts.
I was alone once in my house and heard a hum, I assumed it was just me zoning out. To this day, I couldn't replicate the hum.
Returning home from my daughter's funeral, I paused at the front door, sobbing, and begged god to please take away the pain. As I stepped through the door I paused, confused about where all the unfamiliar toys and clothes strewn about the room had come from.
"Dear VALUED USER, we are writing to inform you of a recent DATA BREACH resulting in the potential loss of your personal information, including but not limited to: NAME, ADDRESS, CONTACTS, CREDIT ACCOUNT, DNA PROFILE, PI CHIP ACCESS. Due to the recent increase in IDENTITY REPLACEMENT incidents, we recommend all users report to their nearest Citizenter for immediate re-validation and processing within 30 MINUTES to preve-ACCOUNT TERMINATED, INTERNMENT OFFICERS DISPATCHED, PLEASE REMAIN CALM."
I guess I was a conspiracy nut job afterall... I felt nothing but joy as they replaced my defunct neuralink implant.
A woman was standing in the alleyway, she said to come with her Her mouth was still the entire time
From my hiding spot among the ceiling tiles, I watched the bullets shred the infected patients under me. The government lied about the cure; there is no leaving this hospital.
When the gang bosses of the city told you to do something, you did it, so I had no questions when one told me to retrieve the ring off of his brother's body in the cemetery at the edge of town. When I finally pried the coffin lid open, I immediately recognized the face of the kid I'd been paid for a hit on the week before, and felt the dirt from a shovel above me start falling on my back.
"You have such a beautiful heart," I said to the little girl. Anatomically, at least.