Talk:Senryū

message: I am planning on making some additions to this senryu page, such as explaning where the word senryu came from and some of the history of senryu. While I'm thinking of what I want to add, and how I want to word it, I want to make a suggestion. I think the entire second paragraph ("Much modern haiku...") should be removed from the senryu entry. It really doesn't say a whole lot about senryu, while at the same time denigrating the more conservative 5-7-5 English-language "Yuki Teikei" style of haiku. I will concede that 5-7-5 haiku written by beginners often seem very wordy and are marred by obvious filler words, but when a 5-7-5 haiku has been written by a knowledgeable haiku poet, that is no longer true. Thus it violates the NPOV principle for the Wikipedia.
gK 9 Oct 2004 6:22 AM PST
:I wouldn't just remove that paragraph outright.  Its important point, that English (and, from what I understand, Japanese as well) poets frequently no longer adhere strictly to the 5-7-5 rule, instead preferring a "one deep breath" rule, is true and should certainly be mentioned.  I think it would be NPOV to say what you just said above: that the 5-7-5 rule may be a distraction for beginners, but that an experienced poet will know how to work with it. 
:I do think that the first sentence of that paragraph is a little confused.  It might be better to say that modern non-Japanese poets, either intentionally or due to ignorance, abandon some of the traditional rules of haiku, instead writing a poem that's closer to a senryu. —Triskaideka 15:03, 11 Oct 2004 (UTC)
replies: text: I don't think filler words are a problem. The idea is for you to think about an image or a situation that isn't temporal or that recurs for eight seconds. I hav a haiku that could simply be trimmed--given an early period--at thirteen syllables to mean the same thing (the tune doesn't end naturally at 13, though). It might be worth working out which rules are the most difficult. I think it's the one about indicating the season, but exactly seventeen is naturally difficult, too. So, perhaps what I should do is write *anything* about this season, and then maybe after ten tries I'll just happen upon something that's exactly seventeen.
<P>Senryu, due to their dark and introspective side I think are naturally going to be less popular than haiku; they hav fewer standards, so they're more temporal.
BrewJay (talk) 18:36, 4 May 2008 (UTC)
thread_title: Untitled

message: The content below should be properly integrated into the article.  I've also taken the liberty of reverting the hokku-into-haiku thing, please see Talk:Haiku for discussion. Jpatokal 03:23, 19 August 2005 (UTC)
thread_title:  Moved from article, hokku vs haiku 

message: lol is "one deep breath" a wise rule I wonder.
As a drama student I was taught to recite entire sonnets in a single breath
I agree. No. If I speak softly ...many more syllables than seventeen.
If I sing out, though...eight seconds. BrewJay (talk) 18:36, 4 May 2008 (UTC)
thread_title: Deep Breath

message: Zappai≠Senryū and so the current Zappai -> Senryū redirect is inappropriate. I propose to create a Zappai stub. Any help in expanding it appreciated. Meanwhile any comments/objections? --Yumegusa (talk) 11:43, 7 May 2010 (UTC)
thread_title:  Zappai 

message: While it's true that Senryu/川柳 literally translates to "River Willow", I worry that it is misleading to tell readers that. Senryu is derived from a name, not a reference to the poetry style (unlike, say, Haiku/俳句). OK to delete? OsFish (talk) 03:33, 1 March 2021 (UTC)
thread_title:  Is it necessary to include the literal translation of Senryu?