Talk:Bullying/Archive 2

message: Does anybody else think that this passage is far too "passionate" for an encyclopaedic article? 
"How do you deal with such bullies? You can call the police and report the behaviour, e.g. excessive noise at unreasonable hours, or continuous noise - councils have procedures for noise monitoring, but since the perpetrators have the 'right' to be told recordings might be taken, you may well go through this several times and fail to prove the nuisance, so getting no-where. You can report intimidation from staring, attacking your car, throwing dog faeces over the fence, threats, unlawfully entering your premises, etc. You can cite the Human Rights Act on your own behalf, but under current law, it is likely that bullies will be victorious. If they are hell-bent on their agenda of getting you out of your home, ultimately the law is on their side, supporting them - not on yours. Once they start this kind of behaviour, beware of the other neighbours, who often will side with them and refuse to help you as witnesses - let's face it, they don't want to become the next victims. If you can endure it, face them with as much dignity as you can muster. Refuse to be bowed by them, hold your head up, even when you are feeling terrified. Ignore them as much as humanly possible, even during an attack. If the attack is extreme, just walk away and immediately call the police. Keep a record of every incident, however minor, and log it with the police. Eventually the police will want the incidents to stop accumulating on their statistical log, so will have to come and do something about it. Just make sure you are in the right, and don't bow to the overwhelming pressure being levelled at you by the bullies. The police are often duped and sympathise with the bully, so don't necessarily expect any help from that quarter, but this is all that is currently available to you."
This passage just seems in such a different tone to the rest of the article.
Andy4226uk 21:56, 8 December 2006 (UTC)
thread_title:  Neighbourhood Bullying 

message: I am sorry that I have not yet put in citations for my additions earlier this week.  I did not even put in tags, but I will look up how to do that (or copy the coding off some other entry).  There is so much to learn and a million pages to learn it on.  My head could explode.  I realized what I wrote would need citations, but I figured Wikipedia was a place where everyone chipped in and would come up with the references that were needed. Just may have been wrong about that.  I have now seen that some people take down your additions immediately if there are no citations and so I'm just glad that hasn't happened to me yet. -I am Kiwi 04:17, 17 September 2006 (UTC)
thread_title:  Citations 

message: The text in the Characteristic Of Bullies section is quite weak. We should try to get away from the idea that bullying somehow suddenly arrived from outer space and is a completely self-contained phenomina. The pathology can largely be explained by well documented psychological conditions such as psychopathy and narcissism. A Pathology of Bullies section is already being discussed on the Workplace Bullying Wiki entry - the same needs to be done here. Maybe change the Characteristics of Bullies title to Pathology of Bullies. --Penbat 11:18, 22 September 2006 (UTC)
thread_title:  Characteristic Of Bullies and Pathology of Bullies 

message: I don't like the reference to the behaviour of bullies being generally considered to be purposeful. It often serves no purpose at all escept to ridicule or humiliate someone.--Penbat 11:26, 25 September 2006 (UTC)
thread_title:  The behavior engaged in by bullies: bullying  

message: I have made minor alterations to the wording, changing statements like "Effects on mental health include" to "effects on mental health CAN include", so as to increase the accuracy of the statements: Every incidence of bullying does not result in all the effects in the list, but it  can, in some cases give rise to one or more effects. The effects that are common according to popular belief are in the lists. Citations are needed however.  I also juggled the list of effects on an individual to categorise these effects into mental health, physical health and social structures. Justdignity 14:13, 25 September 2006 (UTC)
replies: text: Good work, JustDignity.  The correction of all or nothing statements was so needed.  And I agree that the effects of bullying on the individual need separate subtopics.  -I am Kiwi 21:32, 26 September 2006 (UTC)
thread_title:  Effects of bullying 

message: Quite valient effort by probably a school child but it doesnt cut the mustard as it is short on specifics. It is very important that this is done properly and a separate section is needed about how to get legal redress as has already been done on Workplace Bullying Wiki. --Penbat 21:13, 25 September 2006 (UTC)
thread_title:  Ways to prevent/stop bullying and strategic methods 

message: There were WAY too many External links. I removed obvious blogs, non notable, near duplications, workplace specific, unfinished sites etc (sorry this was a "linkprune 911" situation) but needs more pruning still. --Zeraeph 17:07, 14 October 2006 (UTC)
thread_title: External Links

message: Technically this whole section should have been deleted as unencyclopaedic, original research that was so badly disorganised it really belongs in a sandbox not a namespace. 
BUT
It seems to me a very good subsection to have so I have cropped it back to the bare bones in the hope of getting it appropriately expanded and developed in future.--Zeraeph 13:49, 15 October 2006 (UTC)
thread_title: Strategies to cope with bullying 911

message: I think that if a bully is harassing you, don't let him get away with it.  Declare war!  Beat him to a bloody pulp.
SENSAY911 02:44, 19 October 2006 (UTC)
replies: text: What if he's much bigger than you?--Light current 02:58, 19 October 2006 (UTC)
thread_title:  Payback 

message: Curious about how Wiki feels about "How To's", I randomly picked Snake bites and Bone fractures, and discovered they both contained extensive treatment details... so we obviously need to go back to that page.. the Help Desk?  and ask them to clarify this contentious point.  
*--A green Kiwi in learning mode 07:02, 27 October 2006 (UTC)
thread_title: How To's - Some topics DO have them

message: "I was thinking about why bullying exists, and it occurred to me that bullying could simply be an evolutionary product that allows a group to dispense of members that are less 'fit'? Looking at the stereotypical bully victim, there is nearly always a characteristic of the victim that makes them a bad member to have in a group trying to survive in the wild. They are often either fat, have bad eyesight, are very weak atheletes, are mentally ill, are disabled, are socially inept or possess some other trait that nowadays is (or should be) completely irrelevant to how they are treated, but 100,000 years ago could be the difference between life and death for a group of early humans. Perhaps bullying is simply a method of forcing weaker members of the group out so that the group, and therefore the individual (so selection is still taking place at the individual level), are more likely to survive and reproduce? It would explain why the vast, vast majority of bully victims would be considered unfit in evolutionary terms millenia ago." - a user at Internet Infidels Discussion Board —Preceding unsigned comment added by 201.17.149.60 (talk • contribs) 
:There probably is an element of truth in this, in the sense that bullies often pick on those who do not conform to the norms or standards of the group. If you look at animals you will often see a similar phenomenon.
:The Aztec "Flowery Wars" probably served a similar function in their time, but in our more sophisticated age, they are not only socially discouraged but very illegal, as bullying should be. --Zeraeph 13:23, 15 November 2006 (UTC)
thread_title:  The Cause of Bullying 

message: "Actions the Victims Can Take Against Bullying
Stanfield (1992):[13] suggests that the victim may take the following actions against a bully:
    * Do not look like a victim - stay calm with head up, shoulders back, eyes straight ahead with an unconcerned facial expression
    * Ignore the bully. Do not look at or talk to the bully.
    * If you cannot or do not want to ignore the bully, maintain good eye contact and use a calm voice and say the following:
          o Tell the bully what you do not like.
          o Tell the bully how his/her behavior makes you feel.
          o Tell the bully what behavior you want.
          o Tell the bully what will happen if he/she does not stop.
          o If the bully is dangerous - leave and get help."
Should this even be included? This sounds like a fleshed out version of what my Mother heard in the sixties, being a bullying victim back in the old days, I know for certain nothing that makes you look weaker, I.E., the above, will help you. I'm glad to see that adults refuse to punish the bullies was included earlier in the article, but this poor advice, and the advice suggesting adult intervention, doesn't work, and I feel there need to be other sources of advice in this article, suggestions? —Preceding unsigned comment added by Revrant (talk • contribs) 
:Have to admit that in my personal opinion and experience the above advice would rather tend to constitute "asking for it".
:It might be better to leave all subjective advice of this kind, out of the article? Anyway, I have taken it out. --Zeraeph 21:06, 17 November 2006 (UTC)
thread_title:  Poor advice 

message: This isn't even slightly encyclopaedic and can't stay in the namespace, but it's too good to just void so I am pasting it here (which is somebody's cue to tell me it charted in several states and isn't remotely original, and infringes 7 kinds of copyright laws,  but I don't know that so what the feck? :O) ):
:Bullys who are not physically tormenting you are quite easy to deal with... just say to them wow thats so original did you think of that all by yourself and just walk away with your head held high. Never let anybody tell you are somebody less then great. Everybody is great in their own way. And just remember your not alone in this world so dont ever feel like you have to walk alone. 
::~*~If you dont know me Dont judge me
::nobody said you had to love me 
::if ur going to talk and hate
::make sure your facts are strait
::cause wat you think i am
::Chances are im not.~*~
::~*~ Life you gotta take the good with the bad 
::smile with the sad 
::love with you got 
::and remember what you had
::learn to forgive but never forget 
::learn from you mistakes 
::but never regret 
::people change things go wrong 
::just remember life goes on.... ~*~
::~*~ Call me a slut,
::call me a whore, 
::call me a bitch, 
::ive heard it all before, 
::say that i am fake, 
::say that i lie, 
::say that i am hated, 
::say what you want, 
::you wont see me cry, 
::cause i know none of it is true, 
::cause calling me all this shit, 
::what the f*ck does that make you....~*
Orignally posted in namespace by Happylemonstick 10:43, 29 November 2006 
--Zeraeph 14:06, 29 November 2006 (UTC)
thread_title: Strategy Rap