Talk:Computer/Archive 2

message: Oleg, no, it wasn't done with consultation.  I've just gone ahead and done it.  Over the next few days, I hope I (with assistance from others if they want) can work it into a state where it is clearly superior to the existing article, at which point it can replace that article and be the basis for further work.  
I decided on a fork because I couldn't achieve the ground-up reworking I wanted in one go, and I didn't want to leave the article in a screwed-up state.  --Robert Merkel 00:11, 30 July 2005 (UTC)

message: The fact that the text that comes before the TOC is several paragraphs of detailed content seems to be a step backward. Certainly entymology and related info doesn't need to go there, does it? -Harmil 01:05, 16 August 2005 (UTC)
thread_title:  Above-the-fold 

message: ===Intro===
:Perhaps the key distinguishing feature between what we today call "computers" and the earlier mechanical devices is that these devices, ingenious though many were, could only be used to do a limited number of tasks. Modern digital computers are, by contrast, extremely versatile. In fact, they are universal information processing machines.
This is a bit prosy, and doesn't convey information as clearly as it should. Perhaps:
:The distinguishing feature of modern computers is that they are universal information processing machines.
The subsequent Church-Turing info really belongs in a section of its own, later on.
:Therefore, the same computer designs have been adapted for an infinite variety of tasks
That's impossible. Infinite time would be required.
:from playing music to controlling the flight of aeroplanes, and millions of others.
Klunky....
:This article concentrates mainly on the modern, universal, programmable computer. Discussion of earlier types can be found in History of computing hardware.
A section called "History" with the usual:
:Discussion of earlier types can be found in History of computing hardware.
lead-in.
:Computers are present in a huge variety of physical packages.
That should be re-worded. First off, "huge" is subjective and vague. Also, "physical packages" is redundant.
What, exactly was your concern with the original intro? It seems adequate.... -Harmil 01:20, 16 August 2005 (UTC)
replies: text: the Firefox web browser is created from roughly 2 million lines of computer code, and there are many projects of even bigger scope.
That needs to be re-worded. As is, it just doesn't scan well at all. -Harmil 01:25, 16 August 2005 (UTC)
thread_title:  Some difficult text 

message: :Perhaps the key distinguishing feature between what we today call "computers" and the earlier mechanical devices is that these devices, ingenious though many were, could only be used to do a limited number of tasks. Modern digital computers are, by contrast, extremely versatile. In fact, they are universal information processing machines.
This is a bit prosy, and doesn't convey information as clearly as it should. Perhaps:
:The distinguishing feature of modern computers is that they are universal information processing machines.
The subsequent Church-Turing info really belongs in a section of its own, later on.
:Therefore, the same computer designs have been adapted for an infinite variety of tasks
That's impossible. Infinite time would be required.
:from playing music to controlling the flight of aeroplanes, and millions of others.
Klunky....
:This article concentrates mainly on the modern, universal, programmable computer. Discussion of earlier types can be found in History of computing hardware.
A section called "History" with the usual:
:Discussion of earlier types can be found in History of computing hardware.
lead-in.
:Computers are present in a huge variety of physical packages.
That should be re-worded. First off, "huge" is subjective and vague. Also, "physical packages" is redundant.
What, exactly was your concern with the original intro? It seems adequate.... -Harmil 01:20, 16 August 2005 (UTC)
thread_title: Intro

message: :the Firefox web browser is created from roughly 2 million lines of computer code, and there are many projects of even bigger scope.
That needs to be re-worded. As is, it just doesn't scan well at all. -Harmil 01:25, 16 August 2005 (UTC)
thread_title: Programs

message: The stored program architecture link in the section title is not necessary. Just make it a link in the paragraph text. -Harmil 01:22, 16 August 2005 (UTC)
thread_title:  stored program architecture