Talk:Social anxiety disorder/Archive 1

message: Social phobia? Yes, I do have it. So much so that when I've read about it here I just thought I was reading about myself. As far back as I can remember from my childhood I have always had it. Anti-anxiety drugs? Yes, they can help, but only when using them. After the first three days of using them I can feel better and better, and then after I stop using them, everything returns back in the same pace. It seems that more long-lasting effects can be achieved by using relaxation techniques. They are not so radical as drugs but at least more consistant. Exercises? Well, they can help, but very little, in fact far less than relaxation techniques. Now, psychologists and psychiatrists will claim that it can be cured. I do not believe it, frankly. It can be decreased, yes - but not cured comletely, and I know what I'm saying, Im 57 and still have it. When I see people who don't have such problems, I just envy them very much. In some situations with people I feel I'm stupid or crazy and that they see it and know it too, and it doesn't help that I do know I'm not stupid.
Tom
:It appears that in psychological field, the important thing is not what is possible, but what one thinks is possible. As you I have some kind of social phobia, although less important. It was much worse when I was a child, but I managed to reduce it significantly essentially by convincing myself it was possible to reduce it. Today I am almost 30, and I am (almost) normal in public ;-)
:Fafner 13:44, 2 Sep 2004 (UTC)
replies: text: personally, I prefer social anxiety (without disorder) for the condition, social phobic for the person, socially anxious as the adjective, and SAD when I want to emphasize the implication in that acronym. Of course, I have no idea what people prefer out there. In addition, here's a first-hand account from a housebound social phobic. --Euniana/Talk 11:44, 23 Apr 2005 (UTC)

text: "Humiliation" is relative. A person with social anxiety disorder might feel humiliated even if all the people around her would disagree. And who is to say where it counts as "real" humiliation as opposed to a perceived humiliation... I don't know what I'm talking about. ^_^ Sippan 19:58, 17 Jun 2005 (UTC)

text: greetings, fellow Social Phobia sufferers. I, like you, have this fear. My most common symptoms are those of being ignored when speaking to someone or having that person reject me. It's happened before to me. I have said something to someone and get no response, either because that person is involved in another conversation or because he/she isn't listening or can't hear me. What makes me really uncomfortable is trying to talk to someone and their being rude to me. (ex: "hi, how are you today?" "go away.") I'm also afraid of people making fun of me at a party or other social event, because it really utterly humiliates me. I've asked for advice from reliable sources, and I get the same answer: "force yourself into social situations, and you won't be afraid of them." I learned that my grandfather had the same kind of problem, which he cured by forcing himself to go to parties and events like that. Trouble is, that doesn't work for me. As I have just mentioned, I feel ignored at social events. At parties or after church service, for example, people tend to gather into groups and talk, and I feel left out of these groups. i try to join a group of people who are conversing, and it seems that they just won't let me in. They just keep talking and talking as if I'm not even there. If the topic of conversation is something boring or something I can't understand, I get irritated. But I don't really show it. I just wish they would talk about things that interest me or things that I understand well. What really gets to me is how other people can join these conversation groups so easily. It seems, I'm the only person who can't. I'm left out. Alone. You know, sometimes i feel like breaking up these "cliques". I want everybody to know how I feel. I want them to stop conversing amongst themselves and pay attention to me. i want them to pay attention to me! And I figure that I'll do anything to get this attention! Of course, I'd get really uncomfortable if EVERYONE was paying attention to me. I just want a few certain people's attention. Social phobia probably isn't the desire for attention, but if you are scared of attention, because of being judged or humiliated, I guess that is social phobia. any way, I've said enough, and I'm glad to know that there ARE people who feel the same way I do. Scorpionman 01:35, 24 August 2005 (UTC)

text: Wow, the thing about the groups really rings true to me. People always tend to get into circles and talk to each other, and I'm extemely envious of those on the inside of the circle, who can see everyone else's face, while I always seem to be on the outside, where the best view I get is everyone's back. Don't get me wrong, people have not been mean to me at all, and I expect if I really tried physically getting on the inside of those circles I could, but the challence is social. I find those circles intimidating and I've felt so long I now feel repulsed by them. The sight of friends laughing has a diffrent meaning entirely to someone with SAD, it's not a joyful scene but a terrible one, cause you know they must be having fun and you know in that situation you'd be waiting for the first chance to leave. I'm at the point where I cringe when I hear laughter cause I dont laugh like other people do. I also tried plunging myself into social situations but I can't handle it. At my freshman homecoming dance (the first and last time I attended a high school dance) I walked into the gym, saw the lights and people dancing, and walked back out. I hid in the bathroom the rest of the night until my mother came to pick me up. I'm shaking now just thinking about that. It's truly debilitating to have SAD, especially when people think it's just being shy. My roomate and his friends have tried to get me to just walk up to a girl and talk to her, a ridiculously easy task for them, and they seem both highly amused and confused, maybe even annoyed, when I don't. They seem to think it's just being shy, but they don't understand that I can't, I physically cannot do that. Moving to a dorm has been tough. Home used to be the place I could be alone and do homework, but since I'm living at school now SAD is interfering severely with my academics too. I'll take issue with your last comment: I'm not glad to know there are others who feel like I do. I wish no one felt like I do. --2tothe4 23:46, 27 September 2005 (UTC)

text: That's terrible. I feel the same way. Moving into a dorm would be too hard for me. I usually don't hide in bathrooms, but rather outdoors (especially at night). My family always told me that the best way to overcome SAD is to plunge yourself into a social situation, but that would be way too hard. Also, the social circles. I can't stand them at all. I've tried to join them before and I just got completely ignored. I also dislike the sound of laughing, because, well, I just can't! If what they're laughing about isn't funny to me, then I can't stand hearing someone else laughing at it! Also, people in social circles are almost always talking about topics I simply despise (guns, sports, cars, etc), or topics that I know nothing about. AAARRRRGGG! I can't get attention from anyone unless it's unwanted attention (i.e., stealing someone's car, which I couldn't do if I tried). One of the toughest things (though not the toughest) for me is participating in sports. I just can't stand playing basketball, because NO ONE ever passes me the stupid ball. It gets passed to everyone except for me. During the winter, I would usually try to get attention by throwing snow at people (which usually worked). But that's the only way. Of course, it's fun too, but that's beside the point. Anyway, maybe we should form the SADSA (SAD Sufferers Anonymous).
P.S. Usually people are glad to know someone who suffers from their problems 'cause you can sympathise with them. I don't know why you wouldn't be glad about others feeling how you do; well, perhaps it's another symptom of the disorder. Personally, I wish there was someone else around my church who suffered from SAD, someone who I could talk with more easily than the others. Scorpionman 21:32, 23 December 2005 (UTC)
thread_title: Untitled