Talk:Perchlorate

message: Interesting and disturbing update - see article in the New Jersey Star Ledger - March 10, 2005.
[]
--Kjdmsi 19:50, Mar 10, 2005 (UTC)kjdmsi
I feel as if the "health effects" section is written as if it is a refutation of people with concerns over the health effects of perchlorate, rather than an explanation of the health effects. Neutrality concern? For now, I would like to see more citations.
Nleamy 15:06, 14 August 2006 (UTC)
thread_title:  March 2005 

message: So what if perchlorate is found on Mars? What's the big deal? Kingturtle (talk) 14:16, 5 August 2008 (UTC)
replies: text: Should this be included in the discussion in the article? Hendo1769 (talk) 20:27, 5 August 2008 (UTC)
replies: text: Definitely. The article needs to tell us why it is important. Kingturtle (talk) 05:02, 6 August 2008 (UTC)
replies: text: Newspapers are making a deal of it being "toxic", meaninng that it poses a risk to potential human visits there. --MoRsE (talk) 06:02, 6 August 2008 (UTC)
thread_title:  mars 

message: according to my edition of cotton and wilkinson (5th ed, Wiley see page 564) reduction of perchlorate to chloride occurs with the LOWEST potential of all the oxyanions.
Without a reference, I deem the statement "Perchlorate does in fact have the highest redox potential..." to be dubious.
In theory, perchlorate SHOULD exhibit the highest reduction potential. It apparently does not which also coincides with its kinetic stability.  —Preceding unsigned comment added by 38.118.77.19 (talk) 13:44, 30 September 2010 (UTC)
thread_title:  perchlorate reduction potential 

message: Hi,
My classmates (kimaox & Abecks1717) and I are planning to extend this perchlorate page for our class project. Thank you for your future interests on our edits and the page!
Our proposals for extension of the page includes: 1) extending on health effects of perchlorate, 2) addressing clean up issues, and 3) addressing contamination issues.
In specific, our sources addresses many issues and information for our proposal topics.
- Sources and Information that will possibly be added to the article -
 
1) Health effects
Pulmonary fibrosis effect of ammonium perchlorate exposure in rabbit -- This article describes adverse health effects that were present in rabbits after treatment with ammonium perchlorate.
Evaluation of perturbations in serum thyroid hormones during human pregnancy due to dietary iodide and perchlorate exposure using a biologically based dose-response model -- This article talks about the levels of perchlorate intake that is necessary to effect thyroid function in pregnant mothers (late term).
Health survey of plant workers for an occupational exposure to ammonium perchlorate -- The effects of ammonium perchlorate exposure in a large sample of farmers.
Breathing Perchlorate -- Very good outline of perchlorate with a lot of other sources listed within the article.
2) Clean up issues
ENVIRONMENTAL CLEANUP: Transfer of Contaminated Federal Property and Recovery of Cleanup Costs -- This report is about liability and financial responsibility related to perchlorate cleanup, where perchlorate cleanup liability is currently the subject of process of taking legal action between the private properties such as Kerr-McGee Corporation and the United States. However, responsibility issues are still under debate and consideration (case is in pretrial stage). It also talks about laws that affect contaminated federal property transfer to private parties.
Technical Fact Sheet- Perchlorate -- This article talks about which technologies are currently being utilized to treat perchlorate, including in situ and ex situ treatment.
U.S. Department of Defense and White House working together to avoid cleanup and liability for perchlorate pollution. -- This article talks about how U.S. government is trying not to take responsibility in perchlorate cleanup due to extremely high costs. It also talks about how cleanup is a serious and immediate issue to take care of due to water contamination.
Transposon and Deletion Mutagenesis of Genes Involved in Perchlorate Reduction in Azospira suillum PS -- This article is about genes in bacteria (Azoxpira suillum PS) that are involved in perchlorate metabolism, which can be possible tools in perchlorate cleanup. However, not much is known about biochemistry and genetics process of perchlorate metabolism.
PERCHLORATE Q & A -- This article mentions that there is a possiblity that Department of Defense and NASA pressured the National Academy of Sciences to create weaker recommendations on allowable perchlorate levels. Thus, deep research is going on to address this issue. Also, this article implies that clean up issues, such as decisions on which side to take responsibility, should be addressed quickly.
3) Contamination
Perchlorate as an environmental contaminant -- This article is about the environmental occurrence, toxicity, analytical chemistry, and remediative approaches are discussed.
Dissimilatory perchlorate reduction: a review. -- This article also talks about the contamination levels of perchlorate of the surface and ground water and the affected regions.
Perchlorate trophic transfer increases tissue concentrations above ambient water exposure alone in a predatory fish. -- This article examined effects of varying concentrations of the environmental contaminant perchlorate in northern pike based on exposure in water and/or from prey.
Development of freshwater water-quality criteria for perchlorate -- This article also talks about the perchlorate contamination levels in water in the United States and its impact on ecological health risk.  
Kohw 22:42, 21 February 2014 (UTC)
thread_title:  Extending Page Proposals 

message: ===Review 2===
====Introduction====
*Hyperlink additions: pyrotechnics, exothermic
*Good introduction—it contains a nice overview of chemical properties, uses, and health effects. It also engages the reader and makes me want to read more!
*I’m not sure that you need the piece about “oxygen candles” in the intro, as it seems pretty specific. It might be more appropriate in the “Production and Use” section below. It’s also a little bit unclear what oxygen candles are.
*There is a typo in the second to last sentence of the introduction—“as has its effects” should be “as it has effects…” 
====Production and Use====
*Hyperlink additions: oxidation, electrolysis, oxidizer, hypothyroidism, Graves’ disease
*It might be helpful to talk a little more about the production methods. For example, later in your page you discuss the production of perchlorate by lightning. It might work well to mention something about that here, just so that people know that it is produced intentionally in factories as well as unintentionally by the reaction between lightning and chloride aerosols (E.g.: other studies have suggested that perchlorate can also be created by lightning activated oxidation of chloride aerosols (e.g., chloride in sea salt sprays), and ultraviolet or thermal oxidation of chlorine (e.g., bleach solutions used in swimming pools) in water.). You also made a comment later on about it occurring naturally in the Atacama Desert, which might be important to include here.
*It would interesting if you included a sentence about how perchlorates are used to treat Graves’ disease specifically
*I don’t think you need to include the last sentence beginning with “Perchlorate is of concern…” because it doesn’t have anything to do with production or use…it would be more appropriate in the contamination or health effects sections
====Reactivity as an Oxidant====
*Hyperlink additions: oxidizer, endothermic
*I think this is useful information, mainly because this is primarily a chemistry page. That being said, the “Biological Functions” subheading in this area appears to be short and random. It’s a good fact to put in, but perhaps you could just include in the previous paragraph without its own subheading.
*As this is a chemistry page, it might be useful to have a subsection simple entitled “Chemical Properties,” in which you included this information about it being an oxidant. In this case, you could move the “Appendix: Oxyanions of Chlorine” subsection up. It appears to be fairly random at the end of the paper, and I think the information would be more useful at the beginning, rather than at the end of a discussion about health hazards. You could also include some of the properties like solubility, etc.
====Perchlorate contamination (occurrence)====
*Hyperlink additions: Atacama Desert, herbicides, contaminant candidate list (CCL), Lake Mead, Colorado River, ion chromatography
*In general, I think this section has a ton of good information, but it’s kind of choppy and the paragraphs don’t seem to connect
*I think the title of the section should be “Perchlorate Occurrence in the Environment”—because you discuss natural sources and contaminated sources. It might make sense to include subheading that say “Natural Occurrence,” where you include the information listed under “Perchlorate Minerals,” and “Contamination,” where you include all the contamination information  
*Perhaps you could combine the first and third paragraphs under the section—they are about the same thing (drinking water contamination)—I also think that the second paragraph would be better it were the first paragraph, as it introduces how perchlorates get into the environment and why
=====Perchlorate Minerals=====
*There is a typo—lightnining should be lightning*
*The first sentence of the last paragraph (about it being water-soluble, etc.) doesn’t seem to fit in this section—it should probably go in the “Chemical Properties” section I talked about above
=====Perchlorate on Mars=====
*This section is really interesting! It’s well written, and I like the information. Only thing is that the second paragraph seems like it needs a citation
====Perchlorate Contamination (Cleanup)====
*Hyperlink additions: electrochemical, ex situ, in situ
*I think this section should be simply be titled “Perchlorate Cleanup” because that is all you discuss in this section, and the previous section discusses contamination.
*Perhaps you could go into more specifics about the remediation technologies, so that we know why they are costly and difficult to operate
====Health Effects====
*Hyperlink additions: intratracheally, inflammatory infiltrates, alveolar collapse, subpleural tickening, lymphocyte
*I wonder if it would be more beneficial to have this section before the occurrence in the environment section. That way, people understand why the occurrence is problematic. 
*In general, aren’t we supposed to use secondary sources for Wikipedia? Some of this section refers to primary sources and experiments, so you might want to check into that a bit more (for example, the last bit about risk of low IQ with prenatal exposure)
*The third sentence (about the standard of care) needs a citation
====Regulatory Issues in the US====
*Hyperlink additions: EPA, California Department of Toxic Substance Control
*The first paragraph needs a citation, as does the second to last
*The bit about the concentration in breast milk and in formula might be important to include in the occurrence/contamination section
*There is a mistake in the citation format at the end of the paragraph that begins with “In 2003…”
*This section is super long, and it might help to break it into a few subsections 
====Appendix: oxyanions of chlorine====
*I commented on this above, but I think this section would be more appropriate in an introductory section called “Chemical Properties” (or something similar)
====Conclusions====
*The article has a ton of useful information, and it’s really interesting! The biggest thing I thing you guys could work on is the flow within and between the subsections. Some of the paragraphs appear to be repetitive and others (as explained more specifically above) might work better in other subsections. Overall, I think you guys did a lot of work and a great job, though! This is a tough page to edit!
OliviaHall10 (talk) 01:27, 11 April 2014 (UTC)
replies: text: Sbash: What qualifies you as an expert on perchlorate to make this statement? I mean how many articles have you written on this subject?.--Smokefoot (talk) 16:49, 11 April 2014 (UTC)
thread_title: Peer Reviews

message: ====Introduction====
*Hyperlink additions: pyrotechnics, exothermic
*Good introduction—it contains a nice overview of chemical properties, uses, and health effects. It also engages the reader and makes me want to read more!
*I’m not sure that you need the piece about “oxygen candles” in the intro, as it seems pretty specific. It might be more appropriate in the “Production and Use” section below. It’s also a little bit unclear what oxygen candles are.
*There is a typo in the second to last sentence of the introduction—“as has its effects” should be “as it has effects…” 
====Production and Use====
*Hyperlink additions: oxidation, electrolysis, oxidizer, hypothyroidism, Graves’ disease
*It might be helpful to talk a little more about the production methods. For example, later in your page you discuss the production of perchlorate by lightning. It might work well to mention something about that here, just so that people know that it is produced intentionally in factories as well as unintentionally by the reaction between lightning and chloride aerosols (E.g.: other studies have suggested that perchlorate can also be created by lightning activated oxidation of chloride aerosols (e.g., chloride in sea salt sprays), and ultraviolet or thermal oxidation of chlorine (e.g., bleach solutions used in swimming pools) in water.). You also made a comment later on about it occurring naturally in the Atacama Desert, which might be important to include here.
*It would interesting if you included a sentence about how perchlorates are used to treat Graves’ disease specifically
*I don’t think you need to include the last sentence beginning with “Perchlorate is of concern…” because it doesn’t have anything to do with production or use…it would be more appropriate in the contamination or health effects sections
====Reactivity as an Oxidant====
*Hyperlink additions: oxidizer, endothermic
*I think this is useful information, mainly because this is primarily a chemistry page. That being said, the “Biological Functions” subheading in this area appears to be short and random. It’s a good fact to put in, but perhaps you could just include in the previous paragraph without its own subheading.
*As this is a chemistry page, it might be useful to have a subsection simple entitled “Chemical Properties,” in which you included this information about it being an oxidant. In this case, you could move the “Appendix: Oxyanions of Chlorine” subsection up. It appears to be fairly random at the end of the paper, and I think the information would be more useful at the beginning, rather than at the end of a discussion about health hazards. You could also include some of the properties like solubility, etc.
====Perchlorate contamination (occurrence)====
*Hyperlink additions: Atacama Desert, herbicides, contaminant candidate list (CCL), Lake Mead, Colorado River, ion chromatography
*In general, I think this section has a ton of good information, but it’s kind of choppy and the paragraphs don’t seem to connect
*I think the title of the section should be “Perchlorate Occurrence in the Environment”—because you discuss natural sources and contaminated sources. It might make sense to include subheading that say “Natural Occurrence,” where you include the information listed under “Perchlorate Minerals,” and “Contamination,” where you include all the contamination information  
*Perhaps you could combine the first and third paragraphs under the section—they are about the same thing (drinking water contamination)—I also think that the second paragraph would be better it were the first paragraph, as it introduces how perchlorates get into the environment and why
=====Perchlorate Minerals=====
*There is a typo—lightnining should be lightning*
*The first sentence of the last paragraph (about it being water-soluble, etc.) doesn’t seem to fit in this section—it should probably go in the “Chemical Properties” section I talked about above
=====Perchlorate on Mars=====
*This section is really interesting! It’s well written, and I like the information. Only thing is that the second paragraph seems like it needs a citation
====Perchlorate Contamination (Cleanup)====
*Hyperlink additions: electrochemical, ex situ, in situ
*I think this section should be simply be titled “Perchlorate Cleanup” because that is all you discuss in this section, and the previous section discusses contamination.
*Perhaps you could go into more specifics about the remediation technologies, so that we know why they are costly and difficult to operate
====Health Effects====
*Hyperlink additions: intratracheally, inflammatory infiltrates, alveolar collapse, subpleural tickening, lymphocyte
*I wonder if it would be more beneficial to have this section before the occurrence in the environment section. That way, people understand why the occurrence is problematic. 
*In general, aren’t we supposed to use secondary sources for Wikipedia? Some of this section refers to primary sources and experiments, so you might want to check into that a bit more (for example, the last bit about risk of low IQ with prenatal exposure)
*The third sentence (about the standard of care) needs a citation
====Regulatory Issues in the US====
*Hyperlink additions: EPA, California Department of Toxic Substance Control
*The first paragraph needs a citation, as does the second to last
*The bit about the concentration in breast milk and in formula might be important to include in the occurrence/contamination section
*There is a mistake in the citation format at the end of the paragraph that begins with “In 2003…”
*This section is super long, and it might help to break it into a few subsections 
====Appendix: oxyanions of chlorine====
*I commented on this above, but I think this section would be more appropriate in an introductory section called “Chemical Properties” (or something similar)
====Conclusions====
*The article has a ton of useful information, and it’s really interesting! The biggest thing I thing you guys could work on is the flow within and between the subsections. Some of the paragraphs appear to be repetitive and others (as explained more specifically above) might work better in other subsections. Overall, I think you guys did a lot of work and a great job, though! This is a tough page to edit!
OliviaHall10 (talk) 01:27, 11 April 2014 (UTC)
thread_title: Review 2

message: *The article has a ton of useful information, and it’s really interesting! The biggest thing I thing you guys could work on is the flow within and between the subsections. Some of the paragraphs appear to be repetitive and others (as explained more specifically above) might work better in other subsections. Overall, I think you guys did a lot of work and a great job, though! This is a tough page to edit!
OliviaHall10 (talk) 01:27, 11 April 2014 (UTC)
thread_title: Conclusions

message: ====Introduction====
* Overall the introduction is well written and easy to follow, good job! I would add a little more about the health effects to make it even more intriguing for readers to continue reading the page.
====Production and use====
* I would add wikilinks to these terms: oxidation (with a redirect to organic redox reaction) and hyperthyroidism. As well as oxidizer.
* In the introduction you mentioned that perchlorates can be found artificially and be produced synthetically, I would expand a bit on both of these processes here. You mention that perchlorates have been used to treat Grave’s disease, I think it would be very interesting to add a sentence or two about the mechanisms of how perchlorates treat this disease. Overall this is a good paragraph and very readable. However, many ideas are brought up and I believe it would be beneficial to expand them.
====Reactivity as an oxidant====
* The first part of this section isn’t written in the most clear manner and is a bit difficult to follow. Maybe reword it to read something like “The perchlorate ion is the least reactive oxidizer of the generalized cholrates. Despite the general trend that ions with higher oxidation numbers are stronger oxidizers and less stable, the table of reduction potentials shows that of the four perchlorate is the weakest oxidant in water.” 
* Add a wikilink to “reduction potential” 
* It’s been a long time since general chemistry, maybe explain why the significance of the lower E values.I really like the chemical explanation of why perchlorate is unreactive in the last paragraph. It is well written and easy to follow and understand, even if one does not have any background in chemistry.
====Perchlorate contamination (occurrence)====
* Overall this section presents a lot of good information and you guys do a good job of citing sources as well as maintaining a neutral viewpoint. I would suggest breaking this section up further into small subsections, wikipedia articles are always more welcoming and easier to read when the sections are relatively short. Some suggestions at further subdividing this section are natural sources, products that causes pollution. There are a good amount of wikilinks but I would add ones for disinfectants, herbicides. Maybe if possible, it would be interesting to expand on more of the science behind contamination for example why it is so toxic. 
* “Since 1998, perchlorate has been included in [the] contaminant candidate list (CCL), primarily due to its detection in California drinking water.” I do feel like this sentence should have a citation. 
* “The source of perchlorate in California was found to be two manufacturers in Nevada which led to its release into Lake Mead and Colorado River, affecting its intact regions of Nevada, California and Arizona where water is used for consumption, irrigation and recreation.” This sentence is a bit awkwardly worded. I would reword it “The source of perchlorate pollution in California can be mainly be attributed to two manufacturers….” I would also cite some data or another source that has proved the correlation to these manufacturers so it does not seem accusatory.
====perchlorate minerals====
* I would avoid the use of the “Interestingly” because it seems (probably unintentional on your part) that you feel that it is  particularly significant but we should try to maintain a completely neutral viewpoint. Just eliminate interestingly, and you’re just giving all the facts!
* Add a wiki link to “ion chromatography’
* again i would break this section into subheadings
* Really good job with the information in this section! It stays neutral since you provide both theories in the second paragraph
* very well referenced section
====perchlorate on mars====
* instead of “ from 5 cm depth” say “from a depth of 5 cm”
* what does “wt % “ mean” is it weight?  I think you should be more clear 
* the evidence referred to in the second paragraph should be cited
====perchlorate contamination (cleanup)====
* There is no need for remediation to be wiki linked twice, the first time is sufficient. I would add wiki links to “ex situ” and “in situ.” 
* This is a really interesting section. It is well written and easy to understand. All of the references are well cited. I would go into a little more depth with this section and maybe explain one or two of the methods is a little more detail.
====Health effects====
* I would break this further up into subsections, for example perhaps “use of perchlorate to treat hyperthyroidism” and “toxic effects” just so that this section is a bit more readable.
* I really enjoyed the section pertaining to the thyroid. It was very well written and very clear and easy to understand. The material is presented without bias and all the facts on the possible dangers are presented to the readers. But maybe you could expand a little more, for example give a little more detail about why the thyroid gland needs to uptake iodine from the blood.
* “Studies have been performed on rabbits where perchlorate has been injected intratracheally. The lung tissue was then removed and analyzed, and it was found that perchlorate injected lung tissue showed multiple adverse effects when compared to the control group that had been intratracheally injected with saline.” This needs a citation and I would add a wiki link to pulmonary. “In 2006, a study by Blount, et al. reported a statistical association between environmental levels of perchlorate and changes in thyroid hormones of women with low iodine.” This also needs a citation
* Eliminate the word “Importantly” it isn’t necessary and it strays from the very neutral tone of the the rest of the section
* I would paraphrase the quote at the end, unless you think that it is integral!
* “In 2006, a study by Blount, et al. reported a statistical association between environmental levels of perchlorate and changes in thyroid hormones of women with low iodine. The study authors were careful to point out that hormone levels in all the study subjects remained within normal ranges. Importantly, the authors also indicated that they did not normalize their findings for creatinine, which essentially accounts for fluctuations in the concentrations of one-time urine samples like those used in this study.[45] When the Blount research was re-analyzed with the creatinine adjustment made, the study population limited to women of reproductive age, and results not shown in the original analysis, the association with perchlorate disappeared.[46] Soon after the Blount Study was released, NAS panelist Dr. Robert Utiger, a physician with the Harvard Institutes of Medicine, testified before Congress and stated: "I continue to believe that that reference dose, 0.007 milligrams per kilo (24.5 ppb,) which includes a factor of 10 to protect those who might be more vulnerable, is quite adequate."[47]”  → this whole paragraph is a bit hard to follow. I would be more direct with what you think the significance of the study is
====regulatory issues====
* “it begins a process” should be changed to “it began a process”
* many sentences throughout this section need to be cited
* I would go back through this section one more time and try to reduce the wordiness of some of the sentence
* some of the information in this section would fit better in other subsections, particularly the paragraph regarding problems of contamination
====overall====
* to be consistent always refer to perchlorate by the word name there’s a few instances where the chemical formula is used instead
* This is a very well written article! There is a lot of information here and it is presented it a clear easy to understand fashion. However, I would break the sections down into smaller subheadings just to facilitate easier reading of the page and if a reader is looking for something in particular. The article flows very well, you guys picked a great way to organize the information in a very logical fashion. There are a good amount of wiki links but it couldn’t hurt to add a couple more. I pointed out a few instances where I think a citation is necessary. Overall, you guys touched upon the key points and did a great job of presenting different viewpoints and opinions while keeping the article neutral. The intro is clear and I think if you mention a little more health related things it would be even more inviting. I made a few small grammar changes as well.
* Really great job guys! Sbash71 (talk) 22:06, 10 April 2014 (UTC)
replies: text: Sbash: What qualifies you as an expert on perchlorate to make this statement? I mean how many articles have you written on this subject?.--Smokefoot (talk) 16:49, 11 April 2014 (UTC)
thread_title: Review 1:

message: * to be consistent always refer to perchlorate by the word name there’s a few instances where the chemical formula is used instead
* This is a very well written article! There is a lot of information here and it is presented it a clear easy to understand fashion. However, I would break the sections down into smaller subheadings just to facilitate easier reading of the page and if a reader is looking for something in particular. The article flows very well, you guys picked a great way to organize the information in a very logical fashion. There are a good amount of wiki links but it couldn’t hurt to add a couple more. I pointed out a few instances where I think a citation is necessary. Overall, you guys touched upon the key points and did a great job of presenting different viewpoints and opinions while keeping the article neutral. The intro is clear and I think if you mention a little more health related things it would be even more inviting. I made a few small grammar changes as well.
* Really great job guys! Sbash71 (talk) 22:06, 10 April 2014 (UTC)
replies: text: Sbash: What qualifies you as an expert on perchlorate to make this statement? I mean how many articles have you written on this subject?.--Smokefoot (talk) 16:49, 11 April 2014 (UTC)
thread_title: overall

message: I think that the section Perchlorate#Oxyanions_of_chlorine should be moved to the broader article Chlorine to expand the section Chlorine#Chlorine_oxoacids_and_oxyanions and then referred to as appropriate. The content in that section is not specific to perchlorate and there is no discussion about how the information in the table relates to perchlorate specifically. This table also exists at Chlorite#Other_oxyanions and similar content exists at Chlorate#Other_oxyanions, while Hypochlorite does not, but the most striking aspect is that a summary of oxidation states in table format does not appear at Chlorine. In the perchlorate article at least, it feels out of place. Mdewman6 (talk) 01:21, 2 November 2021 (UTC)
replies: text: Someone (anyone, including you) would need to close the discussion according to WP:SECTIONMOVE step 4 and then do the section move (steps 5 and 6). I am happy to do it (to be honest, I forgot I started this discussion), but if you want to, go for it! Mdewman6 (talk) 20:13, 1 March 2022 (UTC)
thread_title: Section move proposal