Talk:Alexandria expedition of 1807

message: Be aware that this article seems to be a copy of a section from Muhammad Ali's seizure of power.  RJFJR (talk) 20:47, 2 August 2008 (UTC)
replies: text: Well I don't think it is now.--Jackyd101 (talk) 12:55, 12 September 2008 (UTC)
thread_title: Untitled

message: Hi, apologies for the length of time it has taken to get to this.
First off, this is a very good start - sourcing is excellent, writing is not bad and there is a lot of fascinating information in the article that I have not seen reproduced elsewhere. There are however several problems.
*1) Even for someone like me, who understands most of the political and strategic necessity and ramifications of this operation, the precise causes of the invasion are not clear. Information is desperately needed on exactly why it was decided that the invasion had to take place and what planning and desicion making when into preparing the operation. In conjunction with this is a need for context - who was on which side of (a very confusing) war, what was the history of operations in Egypt during this war and what the British had been getting up to in the Eastern Mediterranean in the run up to the campaign all need explaining to give a new reader an insight into the strategic causes of the campaign. All of the above should be addressed in the body of the article and not just in the lead.
*2)The lead needs to summarise the article -what happened, why, to who and what were the consequences. I recommend using at least two paragraphs and waiting until the other aspects of the article are up to scratch before writing it.
*3)Headings - there are too many large (==) headings. I recommend turning at least five of the headings into smaller ones to indicate the heirarchy of important events.
*4)More detail - at the moment this is a decent summary of events, but for the article to become better more detail on specifc events during the campaign is required - explain the why, who, what where and when of each event in sequence and tie that in with the overall camapign.
In all, a very good start that by virtue of good sourcing would probably make B class. there are minor issues of prose and it would be nice to turn some more of those red links blue but these are minor considerations ompared with above. Well done, and interesting read and a very neglected topic (this is still the best account of this campaign I've read). Regards--Jackyd101 (talk) 12:55, 12 September 2008 (UTC)
thread_title: Suggested improvements

message: This was not a good idea as I could find no sources for the First Anglo-Egyptian War, and this is not surprising given Egypt did not exist as a state yet--mrg3105 (comms) ♠♥♦♣ 22:35, 22 September 2008 (UTC)
thread_title:  Undiscussed move 

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