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@@ -295,3 +295,410 @@ SpongeBob; Sandy!  [she  gets  onstage  and  hugs  SpongeBob.  He  returns  the
 Sandy; Your  song  is  true.  If  y'all  want  to  be  my  friend,  just  be  yourself.  [Larry  walks  up] ;s1e5_55
 Larry; [impressed  with  SpongeBob's  singing  during  the  big  concert]  SpongeBob,  that  was  so  righteous.  [hands  SpongeBob  a  pencil]  Would  you...  sign  my  pants? ;s1e5_56
 SpongeBob;" Absolutely,  buddy.  [SpongeBob  bends  down  to  sign  Larry's  pants.  His  underwear  then  rips  off  completely,  leaving  SpongeBob  ""au  naturel.""  Someone  off-screen  whistles.  SpongeBob  covers  his  crotch,  grins,  and  blushes  sheepishly] ";s1e5_57
+{system}; [Opens  in  on  a  bunch  of  jellyfish  and  one  flying  out  of  the  field  towards  Conch  Street];s1e6_1
+ French  Narrator ; Ah,  ze  early  morning  in  Bikini  Bottom,  when  the  jellyfish  are  buzzing  about  and  making  their  jellyfish  jelly.  [A  jellyfish  flies  by  SpongeBob's  house.  Just  then  a  giant  periscope  comes  out  of  the  porthole]  Oh,  what  is  happening  here?  [SpongeBob  is  looking  through  the  periscope  from  inside,  Patrick  waits  behind  him]  Collectors?  [SpongeBob  nods  to  Patrick.  They  both  run  toward  two  vents:  one  square-shaped,  one  circular-shaped.  SpongeBob  takes  the  square  one  and  Patrick  takes  the  circle  one.  The  two  approach  ropes  and  slide  down  them.  At  the  bottom,  they  encounter  a  case  of  rope  burn  and  jump  around  frantically.  They  blow  their  hands  to  remove  the  burn.  Once  the  burn  is  gone,  the  two  get  serious  again  and  approach  a  closet.  It  houses  three  sets  of  poles  and  three  sets  of  nets.  SpongeBob  and  Patrick  take  one  of  each,  connect  them  and  test  their  mobility.  SpongeBob  puts  on  his  glasses  and  the  two  seriously  step  out  ready  for  action.  A  jellyfish  flies  by  and  the  two  joyfully  sing  and  follow  it] ;s1e6_2
+SpongeBob;[off-screen]  I  think  I've  got  it!  Wait  a  minute...  [we  hear  jellyfish  stings  and  SpongeBob  and  Patrick  screaming.  The  two  run  back  the  way  they  came,  being  chased  by  the  jellyfish.  They  fall  into  a  heap  in  front  of  Squidward's  house.  The  jellyfish  stings  both  of  their  backsides  and  flies  off.  Just  then,  Squidward  comes  out  of  his  house  with  his  bike] ;s1e6_3
+Squidward;Hm.;s1e6_4
+SpongeBob; Hey,  Squidward,  we're  jellyfishing. ;s1e6_5
+Squidward; Of  course  you  are.  Bye  now.  [walks  off] ;s1e6_6
+SpongeBob; Wait!  We  made  a  net  especially  for  you!  [holds  it  up]  Do  you  want  to  come  with  us? ;s1e6_7
+Squidward; [sarcastically]  Really?  Jellyfishing  with  you  guys?  Oh,  that  would  be  the  best  day  ever  in  my  book!  I  would  love  to  go  jellyfishing!  I  can't  think  of  anything  I'd  like  to  do  more  on  my  day  off  than  go  jellyfishing  with  my  two  best  friends:  SpongeBob  and...  uh... ;s1e6_8
+Patrick;Patrick.;s1e6_9
+Squidward; Right.  But  I  can't.  Bye  bye. ;s1e6_10
+SpongeBob; Next  time? ;s1e6_11
+Squidward; Oh  sure,  right!  Whatever.  [bikes  away under  breath]  Like  that'll  ever  happen. ;s1e6_12
+SpongeBob; You  know,  Patrick?  It  always  seems  like  Squidward  never  has  time  for  fun. ;s1e6_13
+Patrick; Maybe  he  doesn't  like  us. ;s1e6_14
+SpongeBob; No,  are  you  kidding?  We're  his  best  friends.  [Squidward  bikes  down  a  path,  chuckling  to  himself] ;s1e6_15
+Squidward; Jellyfishing.  [as  he  laughs,  his  nose  inflates  and  deflates]  Oh,  I'll  go.  [laughs]  I  sure  had  them  going.  [laughs.  But,  he  doesn't  see  a  jellyfish  which  is  going  in  the  opposite  direction.  He  keeps  on  laughing.  The  jellyfish  ends  up  swimming  in  Squidward's  mouth  and  he  coughs  it  out]  Stupid  jellyfish!  Beat  it!  [He  hits  it,  and  the  jellyfish  goes  up  his  shirt  and  starts  zapping  him,  causing  Squidward  to  veer  out  of  control.  His  tentacles  get  tangled  on  the  pedals  and  he  trips  on  a  rock.  He  bounces  down  a  hill  and  then  falls  down  a  jagged  rocky  cliff.  He  reaches  the  bottom  of  the  cliff  and  immediately  an  atomic  explosion  appears.]  Ow... ;s1e6_16
+{system};" [Cut  to  SpongeBob  sitting  at  his  house.  He  looks  out  the  window.  But,  no  one  is  there.  He  sits  down  again.  He  notices  a  photo  of  him  and  an  unhappy  Squidward  that  reads,  ""Friends.""  He  puts  it  down  and  looks  out  the  window  again.  Squidward,  who's  in  a  wheelchair  and  all  bandaged  up  rolls  down  the  path]";s1e6_17
+SpongeBob; Squid's  back!  [phones  Patrick,  which  causes  the  screen  to  split  diagonally,  revealing  Patrick  on  the  bottom] ;s1e6_19
+Patrick;Yello?;s1e6_20
+SpongeBob; Hey,  Patrick,  Squid's  home!  And  we're  gonna  make  sure  he's  greeted  by  his  two  best  friends! ;s1e6_21
+Patrick; Oh,  great!  Who  are  they?  [it's  revealed  that  the  two  are  phoning  each  other  from  across  the  room,  just  with  different  wallpapers] ;s1e6_22
+SpongeBob;" Us!  [the  two  hang  up]  Let's  go!  [Squidward  wheels  himself  into  his  house.  The  lights  suddenly  turn  on,  and  party  horns  can  be  heard.  SpongeBob  and  Patrick  are  inside  his  house  with  a  banner  that  says  ""Welcome  Home""]  Welcome  home,  Squidward! ";s1e6_23
+Patrick; Merry  Christmas! ;s1e6_24
+SpongeBob; We're  gonna  make  this  your  best  day  ever!  [Squidward  turns  around  and  wheels  out.  SpongeBob  rolls  him  back  in]  Well,  your  best  day's  sure  not  gonna  be  out  there.  [SpongeBob  wheels  Squidward  to  a  table  where  Patrick  stands  by  a  bowl  of  soup] ;s1e6_25
+Patrick;" How  about  some  soup  on  your  best  day  ever?  [Squidward  looks  at  the  soup  and  sees  condensed  Alphabet  Soup  letters  spelling  out,  ""Best  Day  Ever""  Patrick  holds  up  a  spoon]  Here  we  go!  [scoops  some  up,  but  Squidward  makes  some  grunting  noises  in  refusal]  Oh,  it's  a  little  hot.  [blows  on  the  spoon,  sending  steaming  hot  soup  splashing  all  over  Squidward's  bandaged  face.  Patrick  notices  his  spoon  is  empty  and  refills  it  to  blow  on,  covering  Squidward  in  more  hot  soup.  This  continues  for  three  times  until  SpongeBob  pulls  the  soup  bowl  away  and  laughs  nervously] ";s1e6_26
+SpongeBob; I  don't  think  soup  is  the  best  thing  for  him  on  his  best  day  ever.  [walks  near  a  music  stand  and  Squidward's  clarinet]  How  about  some  music  on  your  best  day  ever?  Played  on  your  very  own  clarinet.  [blows  into  it,  but  wind  comes  out  causing  Squidward  to  groan]  Sorry,  my  lips  are  a  little  dry.  [wets  his  lips  exaggeratedly  long  and  wet.  Just  when  he  prepares  to  blow,  a  disgusted  Patrick  snatches  the  clarinet  away] ;s1e6_27
+Patrick; Music  isn't  best  either! ;s1e6_28
+SpongeBob; But  what  is  best  is  what  we  saved  for  last.  The  one  sure-fire  thing  to  make  your  best  day  ever  the  best  day  ever!  [cut  to  SpongeBob,  Patrick  and  Squidward  in  Jellyfish  Fields.  SpongeBob  and  Patrick  hold  nets] ;s1e6_29
+{system}; [chanting]  Jellyfishing,  jellyfishing,  jellyfishing,  jellyfishing,  jellyfishing,  jellyfishing,  jellyfishing,  jellyfishing,  jellyfishing! ;s1e6_30
+SpongeBob; This  is  Jellyfish  Fields,  where  wild  jellyfish  roam  just  waiting  to  be  captured.  [Squidward  rides  away,  but  SpongeBob  catches  him]  No,  no,  Squid!  Over  here!  I  know  you're  eager,  but  you  don't  even  have  your  net.  Patrick,  fix  him  up  while  I  find  him  a  good  specimen. ;s1e6_31
+Patrick; Firmly  grasp  it  in  your  hand.  [places  the  pole  end  on  Squidward's  bandaged  hand,  but  it  falls  because  he  can't  grab,  Patrick  picks  it  up]  Firmly  grasp  it.  [does  it  again  and  the  results  are  the  same.  Patrick  gets  frustrated]  Firmly  grasp  it.  [forcefully  jabs  the  net  through  Squidward's  bandaged  hand.  Squidward  lets  out  a  muffled  pained  scream]  That  ought  to  do  it.  [SpongeBob  spots  a  jellyfish] ;s1e6_32
+SpongeBob; There's  one  in  position.  Ready...  set...  go!  [the  two  yell  out  words  of  encouragement  to  Squidward  and  jump  up  and  down,  but  Squidward  isn't  budging.  The  two  eventually  notice  Squidward  isn't  going  anywhere.  They  again  encourage  him,  but  still  nothing  happens] ;s1e6_33
+Patrick;" I  think  we  gotta  show  him  how  it's  done.  [in  the  tune  of  ""The  Beautiful  Blue  Danube,""  SpongeBob  and  Patrick  dance  along  next  to  the  jellyfish  and  try  to  catch  it.  SpongeBob  and  Patrick  sing,  and  even  the  jellyfish  hums  out  some  music.  After  several  attempts,  they  get  into  a  big  fight  with  stinging  and  such.  The  jellyfish  escapes  the  squabbles  and  swims  by  Squidward  and  stings  him  on  the  nose.  Squidward,  mad,  goes  after  the  jellyfish.  SpongeBob  and  Patrick,  still  getting  stung  by  jellyfish,  notice] ";s1e6_34
+SpongeBob;" Hey,  look!  Squid's  doing  it!  [as  Squidward  chases,  SpongeBob  and  Patrick  cheer  him  on.  His  wheelchair  is  stopped  by  a  rock,  but  he  eventually  gets  back  on  track.  The  jellyfish  lands  on  a  pink  ""rock""  and  Squidward  catches  it.  He  laughs  triumphantly,  but  muffled  due  to  the  bandages  and  whacks  the  net  against  the  ""rock.""  The  ""rock""  surfaces,  revealing  to  be  a  really  huge  jellyfish--the  Queen  Jellyfish.  She  now  floats  above  Squidward.  Squidward  gulps.  SpongeBob  and  Patrick  look  on.] ";s1e6_35
+Patrick; This  guy's  good. ;s1e6_36
+SpongeBob; He's  a  natural! ;s1e6_37
+{system}; [SpongeBob  and  Patrick  start  simultaneously  cheering  Squidward  on  as  he  tries  to  get  away  from  the  Queen  Jellyfish.] ;s1e6_38
+Patrick; Yeah,  you  got  it,  Squidward! ;s1e6_39
+SpongeBob; Yeah,  you're  doing  great!  Go,  Squid,  go! ;s1e6_40
+Patrick; Yeah,  you're  doing  it,  Squid!  See  what  you've  been  missing?! ;s1e6_41
+SpongeBob; Yeah,  you  got,  Squid! ;s1e6_42
+Patrick; You  got  what  you  wanted,  Squidward!  You  can  go  that  distance!  Use  that  net! ;s1e6_43
+SpongeBob; Be  the  net! ;s1e6_44
+Patrick; Yeah!  You're  feeling  it,  Squid!  That's  it,  all  the  way!  The  last  6  miles,  make  that,  Squid!  Go,  go,  go! ;s1e6_45
+SpongeBob; Yeah,  go  by  the  eye  of  the  tiger,  by  the  eye  of  the  tiger,  by  the  eye  of  the  tiger!  Better,  better,  better!  Yeah,  yeah,  yeah!  You've  got  it  now! ;s1e6_46
+Patrick; It's  in  the  bag! ;s1e6_47
+SpongeBob; This  is  really  your  best  day  ever,  isn't  it? ;s1e6_48
+{system}; [The  Queen  Jellyfish  gives  Squidward  an  extremely  powerful  sting.  SpongeBob  and  Patrick  stop  cheering.] ;s1e6_49
+Both;Oooh...;s1e6_50
+{system}; [Cut  to  the  next  day  where  SpongeBob  and  Patrick  walking  in  front  of  Squidward's  place  covered  in  bandages] ;s1e6_51
+SpongeBob; Hey,  Patrick.  Well...  [sighs]  Thought  yesterday  went...  [hesitates]  pretty  well,  don't  you  think? ;s1e6_52
+Patrick; I  had  fun. ;s1e6_53
+SpongeBob; Me  too.  [some  whirring  is  heard  in  the  background] ;s1e6_54
+Patrick; Here  comes  Squidward! ;s1e6_55
+SpongeBob; Oh,  great.  [Squidward  approaches  in  a  stretcher]  Hey,  Squid!  How  about  that...  [Squidward  rolls  down  the  front  walk  in  a  wheeled  medical  bed  with  a  container  of  life-saving  fluid  and  in  a  full  body  cast.]  ...best  day  ever? ;s1e6_56
+Patrick; There's  always  tomorrow!  [Squidward's  bed  bangs  on  the  door,  trying  to  get  in] ;s1e6_57
+SpongeBob; Um,  we're  really  sorry  about  what  happened  yesterday,  Squidward.  [bangs  the  door  again]  Um,  we  got  you  a  present!  [it's  the  jellyfish  that  caused  Squidward  to  encounter  the  Queen  Jellyfish  in  a  jar]  It's  the  jellyfish.  [Squidward  scowls] ;s1e6_58
+Patrick; You  know,  from  yesterday! ;s1e6_59
+SpongeBob; You're  not  still  mad,  are  you?  [Squidward  opens  the  jar  in  SpongeBob  and  Patrick's  direction] ;s1e6_60
+Patrick; Yup,  he's  still  mad.  [The  jellyfish  chases  after  SpongeBob  and  Patrick  and  stings  them  repeatedly  as  they  run  into  the  distance.  Squidward  laughs  to  himself,  his  nose  inflating  and  deflating  again.  The  Queen  Jellyfish  returns  and  zaps  him  again.  Now  he's  burnt  to  a  crisp.  The  cast  cracks  off  in  pieces,  leaving  a  completely  blackened  Squidward] ;s1e6_61
+Squidward;Ow.;s1e6_62
+{system}; [View  of  the  Krusty  Krab] ;s1e7_1
+Squidward; [from  inside]  One  Krabby  Patty  for  table  two.  SpongeBob,  I  don't  have  the  whole  day. ;s1e7_2
+{system}; [Cut  to  inside  of  the  kitchen] ;s1e7_3
+SpongeBob; [speaking  in  French  accent]  Oui,  oui.  Un  Krabby  Patty,  Monsieur.  First,  les  patty.  [flips  it  up  in  the  air  and  it  falls  into  one  of  his  holes.  He  holds  up  the  other  ingredients.] ;s1e7_4
+Squidward; Come  on,  SpongeBob! ;s1e7_5
+SpongeBob; Next,  les  ingredients.  [throws  them  in  the  air]  Ah,  oui!  [catches  them  in  his  holes  and  his  pants]  Les  mustard.  [squirts  some  mustard  out  and  it  lands  in  his  eye] ;s1e7_6
+Squidward; Les  quit  fooling  around,  where's  my  Krabby  Patty? ;s1e7_7
+SpongeBob; Les  hold  on  a  second!  [takes  his  head  and  shakes  it  all  up.  When  he  puts  it  back  on  his  body,  his  eyes  roll  around.]  And...voila.  [goes  up  to  Squidward  and  pulls  a  Krabby  Patty  from  under  his  nose  speaking  in  normal  voice]  It's  under  your  nose!  [laughs  and  puts  it  on  a  plate.  Squidward  pretends  to  laugh.] ;s1e7_8
+Squidward; You're  killing  me,  SpongeBob!  Ha  ha  ha...  you  really  are.  [Close-up  on  the  patty] ;s1e7_9
+SpongeBob; Look  at  it,  Squidward.  Mr.  Krabs'  gift  to  all  of  Bikini  Bottom  --  the  Krabby  Patty.. ;s1e7_10
+Squidward; Okay,  give  it  to  me.  [the  Krabby  Patty  flies  off  of  the  plate  and  starts  bouncing  all  over  the  place]  Come  on  SpongeBob,  stop  it! ;s1e7_11
+SpongeBob; I  swear  I'm  not  doing  anything.  Mr.  Krabs!  The  Krabby  Patty  is  haunted!  [The  patty  slithers  out  the  door  and  heads  for  the  exit.  Mr.  Krabs  spears  it  with  his  leg.  A  tiny  thing  comes  out  from  it  and  Mr.  Krabs  inspects  it  with  a  magnifying  glass.] ;s1e7_12
+ Mr.  Krabs ; Avast,  ye  patty  pirate!  This  is  no  ghost.  This  is...  [view  of  in  the  magnifying  glass,  of  a  tiny  jelly  bean-shaped  green  creature  with  one  eye]  Plankton!  Stealing  me  booty! ;s1e7_13
+Plankton; Hear  me,  Krabs!  When  I  discover  your  formula  for  Krabby  Patties,  I'll  run  you  out  of  business!  I  went  to  college!  [Mr.  Krabs  picks  up  the  puny  pest]  Hey!  Let  me  go! ;s1e7_14
+ Mr.  Krabs ; Oh,  I'll  let  you  go,  squirt.  On  a  flying  saucer!  [laughs,  then  splats  Plankton  on  a  plate  and  spins  him  back  across  the  street,  to  the  Chum  Bucket]  Back  to  the  Chum  Bucket  with  you! ;s1e7_15
+Plankton; You'll  pay  for  this,  Krabs!  [slams  through  the  doors] ;s1e7_16
+SpongeBob; Uh...  Plankton,  sir? ;s1e7_17
+ Mr.  Krabs ; Aye,  he's  been  trying  to  steal  me  secret  formula  for  years,  but  you  haven't  got  it  yet,  have  ye,  bug?  [laughs.  SpongeBob  joins  in,  braying  with  laughter.  Mr.  Krabs  stops,  but  SpongeBob  keeps  laughing.]  Okay.  [SpongeBob  keeps  laughing]  Enough,  lad,  it  wasn't  that  funny.  [SpongeBob  keeps  laughing]  Get  back  to  work!  [SpongeBob  stops  laughing.] ;s1e7_18
+{system}; [Cut  to  nighttime  at  the  Krusty  Krab.] ;s1e7_19
+SpongeBob; [from  inside]  Okay,  Mr.  Krabs,  see  you  tomorrow! ;s1e7_20
+ Mr.  Krabs ; Good  night,  me  boy!  [SpongeBob  walks  out  and  walks  past  the  Chum  Bucket  contently] ;s1e7_21
+Plankton; [unseen]  Psst...  young  man.  [SpongeBob  looks  around  to  see  where  this  voice  came  from]  Yes,  over  here.  Come  on,  boy,  a  little  closer.  [SpongeBob  walks  forward]  Closer...  [SpongeBob  walks]  Not  that  close!  [a  crunching  sound  is  heard.  SpongeBob  lifts  up  his  shoe  revealing  a  squished  Plankton.]  You  blasted  barnacle  head!  I  mean...  hi. ;s1e7_22
+SpongeBob; Plankton?  [SpongeBob  peels  Plankton  off  his  shoe  and  onto  his  hand] ;s1e7_23
+Plankton;Ouch!;s1e7_24
+SpongeBob; What  do  you  want? ;s1e7_25
+Plankton; I  just  want  to  talk.  You  could  say  we're  friends,  right? ;s1e7_26
+SpongeBob; Um...  no. ;s1e7_27
+Plankton;Acquaintances?;s1e7_28
+SpongeBob;No.;s1e7_29
+Plankton; [beat]  Well,  we're  both  invertebrates,  aren't  we? ;s1e7_30
+SpongeBob; I...  guess  so. ;s1e7_31
+Plankton; You  see?  Everything  works  out.  I  have  something  for  you.  I've  been  keeping  it  in  my  secret  compartment.  [rummages  through  his  back  pocket  and  takes  out  a  golden  spatula]  Ching!  [in  unison  with  the  sparkling  of  the  spatula]  Sparkle,  sparkle. ;s1e7_32
+SpongeBob; Wow!  A  golden  spatula!  And  it's  even  got  my  name  on  it. ;s1e7_33
+Plankton; It's  a  gift!  A  gift  from  a  friend.  [hugs  SpongeBob's  thumb]  Friends  give  each  other  gifts,  and  tomorrow  is  my  birthday.  [puts  a  birthday  hat  on  his  head  and  SpongeBob's  thumb  and  then  blows  a  noisemaker.  He  then  takes  out  a  cake.]  And  you  know  what  I'd  like  more  than  anything  in  the  whole  wide  world?  [blows  out  the  candles] ;s1e7_34
+SpongeBob; A  booster  seat?  [Plankton  takes  off  the  hat  and  throws  out  the  cake] ;s1e7_35
+Plankton; Booster  seat?  Hot  dog!  I  mean,  no.  What  I  want  for  my  birthday  from  you,  my  friend,  is  one  of  those  [starts  to  drool]  tender...  delicious...  Krabby  Patties!  [SpongeBob  drops  Plankton  and  gasps] ;s1e7_36
+SpongeBob; You  just  want  to  be  friends  so  you  can  get  your  hands  on  a  Krabby  Patty!  And  I  bet  it's  not  even  your  birthday  tomorrow! ;s1e7_37
+Plankton; Gee,  and  I  thought  you  were  stupid. ;s1e7_38
+SpongeBob; You'll  never  get  a  Krabby  Patty  from  me!  [walks  off,  then  stops]  Even  if  we  are  friends!  [runs  off]  Never,  never,  never,  never! ;s1e7_39
+Plankton; Oh,  I'll  get  a  Krabby  Patty  and  you're  gonna  hand-deliver  it  to  me  personally!  You  weak-minded  fool!  [takes  out  a  gramophone  that  plays  evil  music  and  laughs  evilly  to  it.] ;s1e7_40
+{system}; [Cut  to  SpongeBob's  bedroom,  where  SpongeBob  goes  to  sleep.] ;s1e7_41
+SpongeBob; Good  night,  Gary. ;s1e7_42
+{system}; [Gary  meows.  SpongeBob  goes  to  sleep.  Just  then,  one  of  the  flowers  on  SpongeBob's  bed  pattern  pops  up.  It's  Plankton  in  disguise,  wearing  a  backpack  that  looks  more  like  an  antenna-like  machine.] ;s1e7_43
+Plankton; [chuckling]  SpongeBob,  you  will  be  mine!  [pulls  out  the  gramophone  and  laughs  evilly  to  it,  but  it  actually  plays  a  children's  song  of  the  A-B-C's.] ;s1e7_44
+{system}; [Plankton  immediately  realizes  this  and  flips  the  record  around  on  the  other  side.  It  plays  the  evil  music  like  last  time  and  he  laughs.  Then  he  walks  through  one  of  SpongeBob's  holes  and  begins  his  journey.  Plankton  reads  a  map  that  looks  like  a  regular  road  map,  except  with  a  giant  brain  in  the  middle  of  it.] ;s1e7_45
+Plankton;" It  should  be  in  here...  but  where?  [pan  out  to  reveal  he's  standing  on  the  brain]  Where?  Oh...  [takes  off  the  antenna  thing  on  his  back]  This  will  be  the  beginning  of  the  end!  [outside,  SpongeBob  rolls  to  his  left  in  his  sleep.  The  brain  falls  to  the  right  inside  and  Plankton  falls  off]  Ouch!  Stupid  brain...  [gives  chase]  Come  back  here,  you  swine!  [SpongeBob  then  rolls  to  his  right.  Inside,  the  brain  squishes  Plankton.  SpongeBob  then  sleeps  on  his  back  and  the  brain  stops  rolling.  Plankton  holds  up  a  roll  of  duct  tape]  That's  it,  brain,  you're  going  down!  [Plankton  uses  tape  to  hold  it  down]  Yes,  yes,  that's  grand.  [takes  out  blueprints]  And  now,  for  my  very  elaborate  and  college-educated  plan.  [the  blueprints  reveal  a  picture  of  the  antenna  thing  labeled  ""Control""  and  an  arrow  pointing  to  a  picture  of  a  brain  labeled  ""Brain.""  Plankton  follows  these  instructions  by  jamming  the  control  in  the  brain]  And  now,  it's  time  for  a  little  wakey-uppy.  [his  hands  on  the  control  levers,  he  uses  his  foot  to  press  the  ""Total  Control""  button.  Outside,  SpongeBob  wakes  up.] ";s1e7_46
+SpongeBob; Morning  already?  [Plankton  jams  the  controls  causing  SpongeBob's  legs  to  jam  out  to  his  side.  He  rumbles  and  falls  down.  Plankton  laughs  evilly]  I...  I  feel  a  little  funny  today.  [using  the  controls,  he  makes  SpongeBob  walk.  Plankton  laughs] ;s1e7_47
+Plankton; I  have  you  now!  [outside,  SpongeBob  keeps  walking  towards  the  kitchen] ;s1e7_48
+SpongeBob; Time  for  a  well-balanced  breakfast.  [rams  through  the  wall  and  through  his  refrigerator,  emerging  with  bread,  a  bottle  of  milk,  and  an  egg  carton  on  his  head]  This  isn't  what  I  had  in  mind.  [walks  towards  the  straps  with  his  pants  attached]  Let  me  just  grab  my  pants.  [walks  toward  them  and  they  spring  him.  He  eventually  gives  free  and  keeps  walking.]  I  guess  I'm  not  wearing  any  pants  today.  [crashes  through  the  side  of  the  wall]  I  guess  I'm  not  using  the  door  either.  See  you  later,  Gary!  ...I  guess.  [Gary  meows]  You're  right,  Gary!  There  is  something  wrong  with  me!  Squidward!  Squidward!  Wake  up!  I  need  some  help!  [inside  Squidward's  house,  he  tries  to  sleep.  Off-screen.]  Squidward!  Help! ;s1e7_49
+Squidward; Be  quiet,  SpongeBob! ;s1e7_50
+{system}; [SpongeBob  bursts  through  the  wall  of  Squidward's  bedroom] ;s1e7_51
+SpongeBob;Help!;s1e7_52
+Squidward; SpongeBob!  What  are  you  doing?  I'm  talking  to  you!  SpongeBob!  SpongeBob,  are  you  mad?! ;s1e7_53
+{system}; [SpongeBob  turns  his  head  to  Squidward] ;s1e7_54
+Plankton; [through  SpongeBob]  Shut  your  mouth,  you  mediocre  clarinet  player. ;s1e7_55
+Squidward; Mediocre?  [from  inside,  Plankton  speaks  through  a  microphone] ;s1e7_56
+Plankton; You  pretentious,  little  insignificant  artist.  Your  snivelly  creations  are  worth  less  than  a  protozoan's  waste! ;s1e7_57
+{system}; [SpongeBob  snaps  out  of  confusion] ;s1e7_58
+SpongeBob; Something  must  be  wrong  with  my  brain!  [his  eyes  roll  into  the  back  of  his  head  and  he  sees  Plankton  and  gasps]  Plankton!  [Plankton  raises  his  eyebrow]  What  kind  of  friend  are  you?! ;s1e7_59
+Plankton; Nonsense.  You  never  liked  me,  anyway.  You  wouldn't  even  come  to  my  birthday  party!  [from  outside] ;s1e7_60
+SpongeBob; Get  out  of  my  head!  Leave  my  brain  alone! ;s1e7_61
+Plankton; Never!  Never!  [laughs  and  SpongeBob  walks  out  backwards.  Squidward  turns  pale  and  faints.  SpongeBob  crashes  through  Patrick's  rock  and  reemerges  with  Patrick  sleeping  on  his  head.  SpongeBob  throws  him  off  and  he's  pinned  into  the  ground.  SpongeBob  walks  toward  the  Krusty  Krab.  Inside  SpongeBob.]  Toot  toot!  How  about  a  little  take-out? ;s1e7_62
+SpongeBob; No!  No,  never!  [crashes  through  it,  reemerging  with  a  Krabby  Patty.  Plankton  laughs  evilly.]  You  can't  fool  me,  Plankton,  you  want  the  Krabby  Patty  formula!  [walks  into  the  Chum  Bucket] ;s1e7_63
+Plankton; You  are  going  to  hand-deliver  it  to  me  personally! ;s1e7_64
+SpongeBob; No,  no,  no!  [they're  inside  and  walk  through  a  door]  There's  no  one  here. ;s1e7_65
+Plankton; Don't  remind  me.  Brace  yourself,  SpongeBob.  This  is  my  lab!  [the  room  he's  walked  into  has  a  screen  with  a  live-action  Labrador  Retriever.  The  dog  barks.  They  walk  into  the  next  room,  a  real  lab.]  And  this  is  my  laboratory!  And  did  I  ever  show  you  my  record  player?  [pulls  the  gramophone  out  again  and  it  plays  dramatic  music  and  laughs] ;s1e7_66
+SpongeBob; I  must  fight!  [mumbles  nonsensically,  stretches  his  head  out,  and  bites  against  the  side  of  the  door.  His  body  keeps  trying  to  walk.] ;s1e7_67
+Plankton; No,  no,  no,  no.  [pushes  the  levers  forward,  which  causes  SpongeBob  to  lose  grip  and  slam  against  the  wall  and  wobble  over  to  a  giant  funnel  thing]  There,  you  see  how  much  easier  it  is  when  you  help,  friend?  How  do  you  like  my  analyzer?  It  tells  the  ingredients  of  whatever  I  put  into  it.  [A  robot  arm  clenching  some  seaweed  comes  in  and  drops  it  in  the  giant  funnel  analyzer.  It  has  zapped  and  some  beeping  is  heard  from  the  giant  computer  screen.  The  screen,  then  reads  what  the  computer  says.] ;s1e7_68
+Karen; Seaweed:  50%  Sea,  50%  Weed.  [a  picture  of  the  seaweed  appears] ;s1e7_69
+Plankton; Impressed?  Now  let's  reveal  that  secret  formula.  [laughs  and  pulls  the  lever  forward,  letting  two  of  SpongeBob's  fingers  off  the  patty.  He's  holding  it  with  both  hands,  so  one  finger  from  each  hand.]  And  this  little  piggy  brought  home  a  Krabby  Patty.  [two  more  fingers  loose  grip.]  This  little  piggy  will  help  me  drop  it  in.  Any  last  words,  SpongeBob  SecretPants?  [SpongeBob  tries  to  resist,  but  stops] ;s1e7_70
+SpongeBob; I  just  have  to  say  I'm  sorry  I  let  Mr.  Krabs  down.  [tears  start  to  come  out  of  his  eyes]  I  let  all  of  Bikini  Bottom  down.  But  worst  of  all,  I  let  you  down,  [one  of  his  teary  eyes  twinkles]  you  delicate  little  Krabby  Patty? ;s1e7_71
+Plankton;Mmm...;s1e7_72
+SpongeBob; [tearing  up  even  more]  With  your  tasty,  juicy,  scrumptious,  warm,  steamy  goodness.  [inside,  Plankton  starts  to  get  hungry] ;s1e7_73
+Plankton; Steamy...  [a  live-action  patty  gets  assembled  on  screen  as  SpongeBob  states  the  ingredients] ;s1e7_74
+SpongeBob; I'll  never  forget  your  100%  all-secret  patty,  secretly  assembled  with  undersea  cheese,  pickles,  lettuce,  tomato,  onion,  all  secretly  steamed  between  two  fluffy  seaweed-sea  buns.  [inside,  Plankton  starts  to  drool  excessively] ;s1e7_75
+Plankton; Yes...  yes...  yes!  [jumps  out  of  one  of  SpongeBob's  holes  to  the  patty]  Come  to  papa!  [bounces  off  the  patty  and  lands  in  the  analyzer]  Oh,  boy...  [now  zapped  and  the  computer  reads  out  the  analysis] ;s1e7_76
+Karen; Plankton:  1%  evil,  99%  hot  gas.  [Plankton  appears  on  the  screen] ;s1e7_77
+Plankton; Well,  this  stinks. ;s1e7_78
+SpongeBob; Well,  patty,  I  guess  we  can  go  home  now.  [walks  out] ;s1e7_79
+Plankton; SpongeBob,  that's  my  Krabby  Patty!  [SpongeBob  walks  out  the  swivel  doors  and  they  go  back  and  forth]  Give  it  back,  you  porous  freak!  I  command  you!  My  patty!  [the  doors  come  to  a  close]  No!  I'll  settle  for  some  fries. ;s1e7_80
+{system}; [Squidward  gets  dressed,  takes  a  shower,  gargles,  and  brushes  his  teeth.  He  re-enters  the  scene  in  a  tuxedo  with  his  hairpiece  and  sits  down  at  the  table.  He  hears  laughter  from  outside.  He  goes  to  the  window  and  notices  that  SpongeBob  and  Patrick  are  playing  with  bubbles.  SpongeBob  whispers  into  a  bubble  and  it  floats  over  to  Patrick  and  pops.] ;s1e8_1
+SpongeBobBubble; Hi,  Patrick. ;s1e8_2
+{system}; [Patrick  giggles  as  he  was  about  to  blow  a  bubble.  He  eats  the  bubble  and  whispers  into  another  bubble,  sending  it  over  to  SpongeBob  where  it  pops.] ;s1e8_3
+PatrickBubble; Hi,  SpongeBob. ;s1e8_4
+SpongeBob; [whispering  into  bubble]  Patrick,  you're  my  best  friend  in  the  whole  neighborhood. ;s1e8_5
+{system}; [The  scene  cuts  to  Squidward's  back  window  as  he  finishes  stirring  the  liquid,  and  blows  a  bubble  with  it  through  the  fork.  Squidward's  bubble  is  approached  by  SpongeBob's  bubble,  grows  a  leg,  and  kicks  SpongeBob's  bubble,  thus  popping  it.  Squidward's  bubble  floats  over  to  Patrick  and  pops.] ;s1e8_6
+SquidwardBubble; [mimicking  SpongeBob]  Patrick,  you  are  the  dumbest  idiot  it  has  ever  been  my  misfortune  to  know. ;s1e8_7
+{system}; [Patrick  frowns  and  blows  a  bubble,  sending  it  over  to  SpongeBob] ;s1e8_8
+PatrickBubble; Do  you  really  think  that,  SpongeBob? ;s1e8_9
+SpongeBob; [whispering  into  the  bubble]  Of  course,  Patrick.  Anyone  with  eyes  can  see  that. ;s1e8_10
+{system}; [The  bubble  floats  over  to  Patrick  and  pops,  followed  by  another  bubble  floating  back  over  to  SpongeBob] ;s1e8_11
+PatrickBubble; Yeah?  Well,  I  think  you're  ugly.  [another  bubble  comes  over  and  pops]  Yellow  is  ugly!  [two  other  bubbles,  but  smaller,  float  over  and  pops,  both  containing  raspberry  noises  for  SpongeBob] ;s1e8_12
+SpongeBob; [talks  into  the  bubble,  puzzled]  Patrick,  what  are  you  talking  about? ;s1e8_13
+{system}; [The  bubble  floats  over  to  Patrick.  Another  of  Squidward's  bubbles  floats  over  to  SpongeBob  and  pops] ;s1e8_14
+SquidwardBubble; [mimicking  Patrick]  SpongeBob,  I  no  longer  wish  to  know  you. ;s1e8_15
+{system}; [SpongeBob  gasps] ;s1e8_16
+SquidwardBubble; [mimicking  Patrick]  You  give  bottom  dwellers  a  bad  name. ;s1e8_17
+{system}; [Squidward  creates  several  other  bubbles  and  they  float  over  to  SpongeBob] ;s1e8_18
+SquidwardBubble; [mimicking  Patrick]  If  I  had  a  dollar  for  every  brain  you  don't  have,  I'd  have  one  dollar! ;s1e8_19
+{system}; [Squidward  chuckles.  Another  bubble  floats  over  to  Patrick] ;s1e8_20
+SquidwardBubble; [mimicking  SpongeBob]  Hey,  Patrick,  I  heard  there  was  a  job  opening  down  at  the  pet  shop...  as  some  newspaper! ;s1e8_21
+Patrick; [stands  up  and  yells  at  SpongeBob]  Well,  that  makes  you  a  big  dummy,  you  dummy! ;s1e8_22
+SpongeBob; [stands  up  and  yells  at  Patrick]  Yeah,  well,  that  means  that,  uhh...  so  are  you! ;s1e8_23
+Patrick; Right,  you're  a  turkey! ;s1e8_24
+SpongeBob; What's  that? ;s1e8_25
+{system}; [Squidward  arrives  outside  with  a  lawn  chair  and  his  souffle] ;s1e8_26
+Patrick; It's  what  you  are! ;s1e8_27
+{system}; [Squidward  begins  to  laugh  hysterically  at  SpongeBob  and  Patrick's  arguing.] ;s1e8_28
+SpongeBob; Well,  you're  a  bigger  one! ;s1e8_29
+Patrick; Well,  you're  still  yellow!  And  you  know  what  else  is  yellow? ;s1e8_30
+SpongeBob;What?;s1e8_31
+Patrick; You  are! ;s1e8_32
+SpongeBob; Yeah?  Well,  it  doesn't  matter  what  you  call  me,  'cause  I  never  wanna  see  you  again  anyway!  [goes  inside  through  the  back  door  and  turns  around]  Aww,  tartar  sauce!  [shuts  the  door,  some  houses  in  the  background  briefly  jump  of  their  foundations] ;s1e8_33
+{system}; [Patrick  angrily  opens  his  rock,  which  closes  and  comes  up  sounding  like  an  accordion.] ;s1e8_34
+Patrick; Wow,  Squidward,  you're  choking!  [runs  over  to  Squidward]  Uhh...  uhh,  I  know  what  to  do,  but  I  should  wash  my  hands  first.  Oh,  well.  [takes  a  deep  breath  and  performs  CPR  on  Squidward.  As  he  is  doing  this,  each  one  of  Squidward's  tentacles  suction  cups  pops  up.  Eventually,  the  fork  comes  out  and  Patrick  catches  it]  I  win! ;s1e8_35
+Squidward; Wow!  Patrick,  you  saved  me! ;s1e8_36
+Patrick; I  did? ;s1e8_37
+Squidward; Yup!  You're  a  real  lifesaver,  friend!  [shakes  Patrick's  hands] ;s1e8_38
+Patrick; Friend?  [holds  Squidward]  Friend... ;s1e8_39
+Squidward; [uneasily]  Yeah,  Patrick,  we're  friends...  [steps  back]  just  friends.  [they  both  notice  SpongeBob  is  gazing  from  his  window  with  a  blank  stare] ;s1e8_40
+Patrick; So  what  are  we  gonna  do  tonight,  best  friend?  [walks  with  Squidward  over  to  the  Easter  Island  head] ;s1e8_41
+Patrick; Clarinet?  I  love  music! ;s1e8_42
+{system}; [Inside  the  pineapple,  SpongeBob  watches  the  two  go  inside  Squidward's  house] ;s1e8_43
+SpongeBob; Ahh,  who  needs  them?  They're  no  fun  anyway,  right,  Gary?  [Gary  is  inside  his  shell]  Gary?  [knocks  on  his  shell,  it  sounds  hollow] ;s1e8_44
+{system}; [Cut  to  Squidward's  house] ;s1e8_45
+Squidward; Squidward  will  be  performing  his  version  of  Solitude  in  E  minor. ;s1e8_46
+Patrick; [sitting  on  a  bench  while  clapping]  Yeah!  E  minor!  All  right!  Yeah! ;s1e8_47
+{system}; [Squidward  takes  a  deep  breath  and  plays  a  note,  and  Patrick  immediately  falls  asleep,  to  the  annoyance  of  Squidward.  Scene  now  cuts  to  SpongeBob.] ;s1e8_48
+SpongeBob; Ah,  what  am  I  worried  about?  I  got  plenty  of  friends!  I  can  name  three  right  off  the  bat!  [holds  up  three  fingers]  Uhh... ;s1e8_49
+{system}; [SpongeBob  draws  faces  on  each  finger  with  a  broken  smile] ;s1e8_50
+SpongeBob; The  gang's  all  here...  [looks  at  the  faces  on  his  fingers,  and  his  eyes  well  with  tears]  Ohhh! ;s1e8_51
+{system}; [Squidward  is  dragging  Patrick,  who  is  still  asleep,  outside.  Suddenly,  after  a  few  feet,  his  back  gives  out] ;s1e8_52
+Squidward; Ow!  Oh!  My  back!  I  threw  out  my  back! ;s1e8_53
+SpongeBob; [sees  Squidward  in  pain]  Oh,  boy,  now's  my  chance!  [jumps  out  of  the  window] ;s1e8_54
+Squidward; SpongeBob?  No,  no,  stay  back! ;s1e8_55
+SpongeBob; [running]  Don't  worry,  Squidward!  I'm  coming! ;s1e8_56
+Squidward; No,  no,  no,  get  away  from  me! ;s1e8_57
+SpongeBob; Hang  on!  I'll  save  you!  [rips  off  his  suit  revealing  a  speedo  underneath] ;s1e8_58
+Squidward; [tries  to  get  to  his  door]  No,  no!  Get  away  from  me!  No,  no! ;s1e8_59
+SpongeBob; [jumps  off  a  diving  board]  Hold  on! ;s1e8_60
+Squidward; No,  no!  Get  away!  [screams  as  SpongeBob  dives  into  his  back  cracking  it  back  into  place]  Oh!  I'm  ruined!  I'm...  I'm...  I'm...  I-I  feel  great!  Thanks,  SpongeBob!  You're  a  real  friend! ;s1e8_61
+{system}; [SpongeBob  smiles  wide  in  glee] ;s1e8_62
+SpongeBob;Friend...;s1e8_63
+Squidward; N-no,  no,  no,  I  didn't  mean  that,  no-no. ;s1e8_64
+SpongeBob; Don't  worry,  Squiddy,  old  pal.  That's  what  friends  are  for.  [Squidward  and  SpongeBob  walk  to  Squidward's  house,  an  Easter  Island  head.] ;s1e8_65
+{system}; [SpongeBob  and  Squidward  are  inside  Squidward's  house] ;s1e8_66
+SpongeBob; So  dumb  Patrick  fell  asleep  on  ya,  huh?  Some  friend.  A  real  friend  would  perform  for  you! ;s1e8_67
+Squidward; You  play? ;s1e8_68
+SpongeBob; Are  you  kidding?  I've  been  playing  bassinet  for  years!  [takes  one  from  the  wall]  Give  me  an  A,  buddy! ;s1e8_69
+{system}; [Squidward  plays  a  note  and  SpongeBob  sings] ;s1e8_70
+SpongeBob; Squidward  is  my  best  friend  in  the  world.  [grates  strings  with  bow]  Squidward  is  my  best  friend  in  the  sea... ;s1e8_71
+{system}; [The  bow  flies  into  what  looks  like  Squidward's  head  and  he  screams.  Fortunately,  it  turns  out  it's  just  a  painting   the  real  Squidward  pulls  the  bow  out  and  growls  as  he  snaps  it  in  half  with  his  knee] ;s1e8_72
+SpongeBob; [now  playing  with  his  fingers  like  a  guitar]  Squidward... ;s1e8_73
+{system}; [Patrick,  now  fully  awake,  pops  in  through  the  window] ;s1e8_74
+Patrick; Likes  Patrick  more  than  SpongeBob!  [SpongeBob  slams  the  window  in  Patrick's  face]  Oh! ;s1e8_75
+SpongeBob; [strums  harder  before  slamming  the  bass  to  the  floor]  And  Patrick  is  a  dirty,  stinky,  rotten  friend  stealer!  [smashes  the  bass]  Umm,  I  can  fix  this. ;s1e8_76
+{system}; [Squidward  is  steaming  red  in  fury.] ;s1e8_77
+Squidward; Grrrrrryehhhhherrrryeh!  [kicks  SpongeBob  out] ;s1e8_78
+SpongeBob; ...So,  uhh,  I'll  see  you  tomorrow,  Squidward!  Call  me! ;s1e8_79
+{system}; [Cut  to  Squidward's  bathroom.  Squidward  begins  walking  into  the  bathroom.] ;s1e8_80
+Squidward; Yech!  That  was  disgusting!  I  feel  like  I  need  to  scrub  myself.  [opens  up  the  curtain  and  screams  after  he  sees  Patrick  in  his  bathtub] ;s1e8_81
+Patrick; Hey,  buddy.  I  warmed  it  up  for  ya.  [shows  him  a  brush  and  soap] ;s1e8_82
+Squidward; Patrick!  Get  out!  And  put  some  clothes  on! ;s1e8_83
+{system}; [SpongeBob  peeks  in  through  the  upstairs  window] ;s1e8_84
+SpongeBob; What's  the  matter,  Squidward,  old  buddy?  [notices  Patrick  in  the  bath-tub]  Oh,  ho-ho!  So  this  is  what  I  find,  huh?!  My  best  friend  and  my  ex-best  friend  and...  [shown  bath  toys]  ...rubber  bath  toys! ;s1e8_85
+Patrick; [simultaneously]  Oh,  yeah?!  Well,  he  was  my  friend  first! ;s1e8_86
+SpongeBob; [simultaneously]  You're  just  a  backbiting,  backstabbing  silly  blob  of... ;s1e8_87
+Squidward; [screams]  This  can't  be  happening  to  me!  [runs  away  while  SpongeBob  and  Patrick  stop  their  arguing  as  they  notice  Squidward's  gone] ;s1e8_88
+SpongeBob;Buddy!;s1e8_89
+Patrick; Squidward,  where  are  you?! ;s1e8_90
+SpongeBob; Where'd  ya  go,  friend? ;s1e8_91
+Patrick; Where  are  ya,  ol'  buddy? ;s1e8_92
+Squidward; [hiding  in  a  trash  can]  Oh,  this  is  nuts!  I  need  a  plan  to  get  those  two  back  together  and  outta  my  hair! ;s1e8_93
+{system}; [Bubble  transition.  Cut  to  next  scene,  at  SpongeBob's  house.  SpongeBob  reads  a  magazine.  The  doorbell  rings,  and  a  letter  is  pushed  under  the  door.  Then  he  smells  it] ;s1e8_94
+SpongeBob; [sniffs  letter]  Squidward.  [opens  it]  A  dinner  party?  I'd  love  to!  [knocks  on  Squidward's  door  and  Squidward  opens  it]  Did  you  miss  me? ;s1e8_95
+Squidward; Come  on  in!  You  look  stunning.  [shuts  the  door] ;s1e8_96
+SpongeBob; I'd  much  rather  dine  with  you  than  that  lousy...  [gasps  when  he  sees  Patrick]  Say,  what  gives?!  I'm  not  sitting  near  that  maniac! ;s1e8_97
+Patrick; Me  neither!  This  was  a  setup! ;s1e8_98
+Squidward; I  thought  you  two  were  my  best  friends. ;s1e8_99
+Squidward; [takes  out  a  bottle  of  soda]  Well,  how  about  some  soda,  guys?  [SpongeBob  shows  him  his  glass] ;s1e8_100
+SpongeBob; Yes,  please!  [Squidward  gives  him  some  soda]  Thanks,  friend.  [flicks  Squidward's  nose  and  drinks] ;s1e8_101
+Patrick; How  about  some  for  your  best  friend?  [SpongeBob  puts  his  glass  in  front  of  Patrick's,  so  he  gets  the  soda  instead  of  Patrick] ;s1e8_102
+SpongeBob; Thanks,  best  friend!  [drinks] ;s1e8_103
+Patrick; Can  I  have  some  now,  buddy? ;s1e8_104
+SpongeBob; Wait,  I  need  some  more!  [pours  SpongeBob  another  glass] ;s1e8_105
+Patrick; I  still  didn't  get  any!  [SpongeBob  gives  Patrick  his  soda] ;s1e8_106
+SpongeBob; There  ya  go.  More  please!  [Squidward  fills  his  glass  as  SpongeBob  drinks  it  really  fast] ;s1e8_107
+Patrick; [shows  Squidward  his  glass]  Squidward! ;s1e8_108
+SpongeBob; [shows  Squidward  his  glass]  Squidward! ;s1e8_109
+Patrick; [shows  Squidward  his  glass]  Hey,  Squidward! ;s1e8_110
+SpongeBob; [shows  Squidward  his  glass]  Squidward! ;s1e8_111
+Patrick; [shows  Squidward  his  glass]  Squidward!  [shows  Squidward  his  glass  again,  but  it's  still  full]  Squidward! ;s1e8_112
+Squidward; Patrick!  Your  glass  is  full! ;s1e8_113
+Patrick; Oh,  yeah... ;s1e8_114
+SpongeBob; [shows  Squidward  his  glass]  Squidward! ;s1e8_115
+Patrick; [shows  Squidward  his  glass]  Hey,  Squidward! ;s1e8_116
+SpongeBob; [shows  Squidward  his  glass]  Squidward! ;s1e8_117
+Patrick; [shows  Squidward  his  glass]  Squidward! ;s1e8_118
+SpongeBob; [shows  Squidward  his  glass]  Squidward! ;s1e8_119
+Patrick; [shows  Squidward  his  glass]  Hey,  Squidward! ;s1e8_120
+SpongeBob; [shows  Squidward  his  glass]  Squidward! ;s1e8_121
+Patrick; [shows  Squidward  his  glass]  Hey,  Squidward! ;s1e8_122
+SpongeBob; [shows  Squidward  his  glass]  Squidward! ;s1e8_123
+Patrick; [shows  Squidward  his  glass]  Squidward! ;s1e8_124
+SpongeBob; [shows  Squidward  his  glass]  Squidward! ;s1e8_125
+Patrick; [shows  Squidward  his  glass]  Hey,  Squidward! ;s1e8_126
+{system}; [both  show  Squidward  their  glasses]  Squidward! ;s1e8_127
+Squidward; Sorry,  boys,  I'm  all  out  of  pop.  I'm  gonna  go  get  some  more.  [walks  away]  Why  don't  you  just  stay  here  and  chat?  [closes  door.] ;s1e8_128
+{system}; [Then  we  see  SpongeBob  and  Patrick.  They  are  extremely  fat  and  not  wanting  to  look  at  each  other.  Then  SpongeBob  hiccups  and  a  bubble  floats  up  and  pops  that  sounds  like  a  burp.  Both  of  them  laugh  and  the  entire  house  is  full  of  bubbles  as  Squidward  walks  up  to  his  door  with  a  grocery  bag.  Then  an  explosion  and  crashing  sounds  are  heard] ;s1e8_129
+Squidward; I  should  just  walk  away  right  now.  [opens  door  to  find  his  house  destroyed]  What  a  surprise...  I  invited  them  in,  and  I  left  them  alone.  Well,  Squidward,  what  have  we  learned  today?  [pieces  around  the  door  break] ;s1e8_130
+SpongeBob; Guess  what,  Squidward?  [both  SpongeBob  and  Patrick  hold  each  others'  hips  in  a  friendly  way] ;s1e8_131
+Patrick; Me  and  SpongeBob  are  friends  again! ;s1e8_132
+Squidward; Great,  now  go  be  friends  somewhere  else. ;s1e8_133
+SpongeBob; Don't  you  want  us  to  help  you  clean  this  up  a  little? ;s1e8_134
+Squidward; No!  Out! ;s1e8_135
+{system}; [Both  SpongeBob  and  Patrick  walk  out] ;s1e8_136
+SpongeBob; Psst,  I  think  he's  jealous. ;s1e8_137
+Patrick; How  pathetic. ;s1e8_138
+{system}; [Squidward  shuts  door  hard  and  when  he  turns  around  as  a  bubble  comes  and  pops  on  the  door  which  causes  the  door  to  fall  on  his  back] ;s1e8_139
+Squidward; Ohhhhh,  my  back. ;s1e8_140
+{system}; [SpongeBob's  foghorn  alarm  goes  off] ;s1e9_1
+SpongeBob; This  is  it,  Gary! ;s1e9_2
+Gary;" Meow.  [SpongeBob's  bed  bounces  up  and  flings  SpongeBob  onto  the  calendar,  where  he  lands  on  March  3rd  with  the  words  ""boating  exam  today!""  on  it  then  drops  to  the  floor] ";s1e9_3
+SpongeBob; The  big  boating  exam  is  today!  I've  never  felt  so  capable!  [A  door  opens  from  underneath  him.  He  comes  out  of  his  house  riding  a  unicycle]  I'm  ready,  I'm  ready,  I'm  ready.  Squidward!  Squidward! ;s1e9_4
+Squidward;What?;s1e9_5
+SpongeBob; I'm  ready,  Squidward!  [rides  his  unicycle  around  Squidward's  house] ;s1e9_6
+Squidward; Ready  to  move? ;s1e9_7
+SpongeBob; No,  I'm  ready  to  pass  my  boating  test.  [rides  his  unicycle  towards  Mrs.  Puff's  Boating  School]  I'm  ready,  I'm  ready,  I'm  ready...  [stops  his  unicycle  near  a  dumpster  and  jumps  off  of  it]  I'm  ready-eady-eady-eady-eady-eady-eady-eady-ready.  Well,  pal,  I  won't  be  needing  you  anymore.  [throws  the  unicycle  into  the  dumpster]  I'm  ready,  I'm  ready,  I'm  ready!  Oh,  yeah!  I'm  ready! ;s1e9_8
+ Incidental  27 ; Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!  Yes!  Hey,  I  just  got  my  license! ;s1e9_9
+SpongeBob; [snaps  his  fingers]  Hey,  I'm  getting  mine  next! ;s1e9_10
+ Incidental  27 ; Hey,  I  doubt  it!  [walks  off] ;s1e9_11
+SpongeBob; Okay,  see  you  on  the  road.  I'm  ready!  Here  I  come,  Mrs.  Puff!  I'm  ready,  I'm  ready,  I'm  ready,  I'm  ready,  I'm  ready,  I'm  ready,  I'm  ready.  [jumps  around  the  boardwalk.  Camera  goes  inside  the  school,  as  a  female  pufferfish  looks  out  the  window  and  sees  SpongeBob  jumping  around.] ;s1e9_12
+ Mrs.  Puff ; [sighs]  I'm  not  ready.  [opens  the  door] ;s1e9_13
+SpongeBob; Hi,  Mrs.  Puff!  Today  is  the  day  I'm  going  to  pass  my  boating  exam! ;s1e9_14
+ Mrs.  Puff ; [with  a  clipboard  and  a  pen  in  hand]  We'll  see  about  that,  SpongeBob.  First  we  must... ;s1e9_15
+SpongeBob; First  I  must  pass  the  oral  exam.  I  am  confident  in  my  abilities  to  successfully  succeed. ;s1e9_16
+ Mrs.  Puff ; I  know.  Okay,  #1:  What  is  the  front  of  the  boat? ;s1e9_17
+SpongeBob; The  bow.  [Mrs.  Puff  writes  down  his  answer] ;s1e9_18
+ Mrs.  Puff ; What  is  the  back? ;s1e9_19
+SpongeBob; Stern.  [Mrs.  Puff  writes  down  his  answer] ;s1e9_20
+ Mrs.  Puff ; #3:  Right  is... ;s1e9_21
+SpongeBob; Starboard.  [answers  the  remaining  questions]  Port.  Skipper.  Deck.  Cabin.  Galley.  Keel.  1924.  [Mrs.  Puff  writes  down  his  answers] ;s1e9_22
+ Mrs.  Puff ; You've  passed  the  oral  test.  [sarcastically]  What  a  surprise.  [gets  in  the  boat  and  secures  herself  tightly]  Now  it's  time  to  once  again  take  the  driving  portion  of  the  exam.  Okay,  SpongeBob,  get  in  the  boat. ;s1e9_23
+SpongeBob; Oh,  in  this  boat  right  here?  [looks  at  his  watch]  Is  it  time  already? ;s1e9_24
+ Mrs.  Puff ; Get  in  the  boat,  SpongeBob. ;s1e9_25
+SpongeBob; Oh  yeah,  absolutely.  [gets  in  and  closes  his  eyes  with  a  smile] ;s1e9_26
+ Mrs.  Puff ; All  you  have  to  do  is  get  on  the  track. ;s1e9_27
+{system}; [SpongeBob's  eyes  spring  open  in  awe he  looks  ahead  to  the  track  that  gets  longer  and  longer  in  delusion] ;s1e9_28
+ Mrs.  Puff ; Okay,  SpongeBob,  what's  the  first  thing  you  do? ;s1e9_29
+SpongeBob;1924...?;s1e9_30
+ Mrs.  Puff ; No,  no.  First  thing  is  to  start  the  boat.  [turns  the  engine  on  and  SpongeBob  goes  crazy]  SpongeBob?  SpongeBob?  Relax,  it's  only  the  boat. ;s1e9_31
+SpongeBob; The  boat? ;s1e9_32
+ Mrs.  Puff ; Okay,  now  what  do  you  do  next? ;s1e9_33
+SpongeBob; Floor  it? ;s1e9_34
+ Mrs.  Puff ; Yes...  no!  No,  don't  floor  it. ;s1e9_35
+SpongeBob; Floor  it?! ;s1e9_36
+ Mrs.  Puff ; No,  no,  don't,  don't  floor  it! ;s1e9_37
+SpongeBob; Okay,  floor  it!  [SpongeBob  slams  on  the  accelerator  and  starts  driving  backwards  really  fast] ;s1e9_38
+ Mrs.  Puff ; No!  No,  no,  no,  nooooo!  [the  boat  whizzes  by  some  spectators  before  crashing  into  a  lighthouse.  After  crashing,  Mrs.  Puff  inflates  to  three  times  her  size.  The  lighthouse  falls,  and  Mrs.  Puff  speaks  with  a  deep  voice]  Oh,  SpongeBob,  why? ;s1e9_39
+Fred; My  leg...! ;s1e9_40
+SpongeBob; [in  his  bed  at  night]  I  don't  know  why,  Gary.  I  don't  know.  I'm  tired  of  failing  that  boating  test.  I've  already  taken  it  37  times. ;s1e9_41
+Gary;Meow.;s1e9_42
+SpongeBob; Okay,  38.  [puts  his  pillow  on  his  head] ;s1e9_43
+Gary; [puts  on  SpongeBob's  boots]  Meow. ;s1e9_44
+Patrick; [over  walkie-talkie  in  SpongeBob's  bed]  SpongeBob,  this  is  Star  Ranger,  over. ;s1e9_45
+SpongeBob; [through  walkie-talkie]  What  is  it,  Patrick? ;s1e9_46
+Patrick; [through  walkie-talkie]  I  got  a  surprise  for  you. ;s1e9_47
+SpongeBob; [through  walkie-talkie]  Oh,  Patrick,  I'm  not  in  the  mood. ;s1e9_48
+Patrick; [through  walkie-talkie]  Get  out  of  bed.  [SpongeBob  gets  out  of  bed] ;s1e9_49
+SpongeBob; [through  walkie-talkie]  Okay,  now  what,  Patrick? ;s1e9_50
+Patrick; [through  walkie-talkie]  Go  to  your  closet  for  a  surprise.  [SpongeBob  slides  down  a  room  and  stands  up  in  front  of  his  closet  door] ;s1e9_51
+SpongeBob; [through  walkie-talkie]  Okay,  I'm  at  the  closet. ;s1e9_52
+Patrick; [through  walkie-talkie]  Listen  carefully.  What's  pink  and  square  at  the  same  time? ;s1e9_53
+SpongeBob; [through  walkie-talkie]  I  don't  know,  Patrick.  [opens  the  closet  door,  revealing  Patrick  wearing  SpongeBob's  clothes] ;s1e9_54
+Patrick; Patrick  SquarePants! ;s1e9_55
+SpongeBob; [deadpan]  Pat,  don't  do  that.  [sits  in  a  chair]  I've  got  too  much  to  worry  about. ;s1e9_56
+Patrick; What's  the  problem? ;s1e9_57
+SpongeBob; I  can't  pass  my  boating  exam.  I've  taken  it  37... ;s1e9_58
+Gary;Meow.;s1e9_59
+SpongeBob; ...uhh,  38  times.  I  know  all  the  answers...  [Patrick's  square  pants  rip  off]  ...until  I  get  behind  the  wheel.  I  just  need  something  to  help  me  think  straight. ;s1e9_60
+Patrick; Thinking  straight  is  what  I  do.  You  drive  and  I'll  do  all  the  thinking  for  you.  [takes  SpongeBob's  walkie-talkie] ;s1e9_61
+SpongeBob; How  are  we  going  to  do  that?  [Patrick  puts  a  walkie-talkie  into  SpongeBob's  head  with  the  antenna  coming  out  of  the  top] ;s1e9_62
+Patrick; Come  in,  SpongeBob.  Hello?  Hello? ;s1e9_63
+SpongeBob; Hey!  I  can  hear  you  in  my  head!  This  is  great!  While  I'm  taking  the  test,  you  can  give  me  all  the  answers.  [notices  the  antenna  sticking  out]  Wait  a  minute,  Patrick.  Won't  I  look  silly  with  this  antenna  coming  out  of  my  head?  [Patrick  puts  a  tall  hat  over  the  antenna.  Next,  we  see  a  big  telescope  peeking  out  SpongeBob's  upstairs  window] ;s1e9_64
+Patrick; [through  walkie-talkie]  Pat  to  Sponge,  Pat  to  Sponge,  testing,  testing.  [looking  through  the  telescope  at  SpongeBob]  Testing,  testing,  testing,  testing,  testing,  testing!  [loudly]  Testing!  [screams]  Test,  test.  Do  you  read?! ;s1e9_65
+SpongeBob; Sponge  to  Pat,  I  read  you  loud  and  clear,  over. ;s1e9_66
+Patrick; [through  walkie-talkie]  Got  your  apple  ready?  [SpongeBob  shows  an  apple]  Lucky  undergarments?  Hold  on.  Hold  on.  [focuses  in  on  the  underwear  with  the  telescope  to  reveal  the  word  lucky  on  the  top  of  it]  Bingo!  Underwear,  apple,  and  me.  You're  ready  to  get  that  license.  Uh-oh,  here  comes  Mrs.  Puff!  Act  natural.  [SpongeBob  jumps  out  of  the  boat,  then  gets  on  the  ground  on  all  fours  and  starts  chewing  grass.] ;s1e9_67
+SpongeBob; [Moos  like  a  cow] ;s1e9_68
+Patrick; [through  walkie-talkie]  No,  no,  get  in  the  boat!  [SpongeBob  jumps  in  the  boat.  An  ambulance  arrives  with  its  siren  on  and  drops  off  Mrs.  Puff]  Give  her  the  apple.  [SpongeBob  gives  her  the  apple] ;s1e9_69
+SpongeBob; Here  you  go,  ma'am.  [Mrs.  Puff  throws  apple  in  her  mouth  and  swallows] ;s1e9_70
+ Mrs.  Puff ; Let's  get  this  over  with.  [takes  a  deep  breath]  What's  the  first  thing  you  do?  [puts  hands  and  arms  over  head  for  protection] ;s1e9_71
+SpongeBob; [starts  to  get  scared]  Uhh... ;s1e9_72
+Patrick; [through  walkie-talkie]  Start  the  boat.  [SpongeBob  starts  the  boat.  The  engine  starting  up  causes  Mrs.  Puff  to  go  crazy] ;s1e9_73
+SpongeBob; Mrs.  Puff.  Mrs.  Puff! ;s1e9_74
+ Mrs.  Puff ; Whoa-ho!  Huh?  What? ;s1e9_75
+SpongeBob; It's  okay,  it's  only  the  boat. ;s1e9_76
+ Mrs.  Puff ; The  boat?  You  started  the  boat? ;s1e9_77
+SpongeBob; I...  I  think  so. ;s1e9_78
+ Mrs.  Puff ; Oh.  Well...  what's  the  second  thing  you  do? ;s1e9_79
+SpongeBob;1924?;s1e9_80
+Patrick; [through  walkie-talkie]  No,  no,  put  it  in  drive. ;s1e9_81
+SpongeBob; Put  it  in  drive? ;s1e9_82
+ Mrs.  Puff ; Yes,  yes,  yes!  [SpongeBob  pushes  lever  down  to  drive]  Put  it  in  drive.  Then  what? ;s1e9_83
+SpongeBob; [lifts  leg  up]  Floor  it? ;s1e9_84
+ Mrs.  Puff ; No!  [screams]  No! ;s1e9_85
+Patrick; [through  walkie-talkie]  Freeze,  mister!  [SpongeBob  stops]  Big  toe.  [SpongeBob's  big  toe  pops  out  of  his  shoe  and  gently  pushes  the  accelerator  down] ;s1e9_86
+ Mrs.  Puff ; Oh,  gracious.  Oh,  gracious!  Oh-oh.  Ha-ha!  Ah,  we  haven't  crashed  yet. ;s1e9_87
+Patrick; [through  walkie-talkie]  Okay,  you're  coming  to  your  first  turn.  [a  giant  wall  with  the  word  wall  on  it  is  shown  and  a  left  curve] ;s1e9_88
+ Mrs.  Puff ; Oh  no,  the  first  turn.  Please,  tell  me  you  know  what  to  do  at  the  first  turn! ;s1e9_89
+Patrick; [through  walkie-talkie]  Left.  [SpongeBob  turns  left] ;s1e9_90
+ Mrs.  Puff ;Oh!;s1e9_91
+Patrick; [through  walkie-talkie]  Right.  [SpongeBob  turns  right] ;s1e9_92
+ Mrs.  Puff ; Oh!  My,  this  is  splendid,  SpongeBob.  You're  doing  fine. ;s1e9_93
+Montage; [SpongeBob  stops  at  a  stop  sign  and  looks  both  ways  before  starting  to  drive  again.  Then  drives  around  with  his  left  arm  out  making  a  signal.  Patrick  still  talking  to  SpongeBob  through  the  walkie-talkie  as  SpongeBob  drives  over  a  big  hill  in  the  road.  As  Mrs.  Puff  writes  a  couple  things  on  her  clipboard,  Patrick  is  putting  on  another  pair  of  SquarePants.  SpongeBob  pulls  back  on  the  boat  and  the  boat  jumps  in  the  air  over  a  big  anchor.  Patrick  finds  SpongeBob's  diary  and  begins  to  read  and  laugh  at  it  as  SpongeBob  jumps  off  a  ramp  through  a  ring  of  fire.  Fred  is  walking  across  the  course  but  SpongeBob  stops  the  boat  and  helps  him  walk  across.  He  gets  back  in  the  boat  as  Patrick  is  eating  out  of  SpongeBob's  fridge.  SpongeBob  is  sitting  back  and  driving  with  his  feet  and  driving  upside  down.] ;s1e9_94
+ Mrs.  Puff ; Splendid!  Wonderful!  [sign  that  reads  finish  line  is  just  ahead]  There's  the  finish  line.  It's  unbelievable.  You've  shown  the  most  spectacular  improvement  of  any  student  I've  ever  seen.  What's  your  secret?  A  little  radio  in  your  head?  [everyone  laughs]  Oh,  and  under  that  hat  is  some  kind  of,  uhh,  antenna?  [everyone  laughs  again]  And  some  guy  miles  away  from  here  is  giving  you  all  the  answers?  [everyone  laughs  a  third  time]  Oh,  yes,  but  that  would  be  cheating. ;s1e9_95
+{system}; [SpongeBob  opens  his  eyes  wide  realizing  he  is  cheating only  Patrick  laughs] ;s1e9_96
+Patrick; Cheating!  [laughing  hysterically] ;s1e9_97
+SpongeBob; I'm  cheating?!  Mrs.  Puff! ;s1e9_98
+ Mrs.  Puff ; Yes,  my  star  pupil? ;s1e9_99
+SpongeBob; I  think  I'm  cheating. ;s1e9_100
+ Mrs.  Puff ; What's  that,  dear?  [SpongeBob  takes  a  hold  of  Mrs.  Puff] ;s1e9_101
+SpongeBob; I  think  I  am  cheating! ;s1e9_102
+ Mrs.  Puff ; You've...  you've  let  go  of  the  wheel. ;s1e9_103
+SpongeBob; I  do  have  an  antenna  under  my  hat!  [shows  the  antenna  under  his  hat]  There  is  a  guy  giving  me  all  the  answers!  It's  all  true!  [crying]  I'm  cheating!  I'm  cheating!  I'm  cheating! ;s1e9_104
+Patrick; What?!  [runs  out  of  SpongeBob's  house  and  back  under  his  rock,  crying] ;s1e9_105
+SpongeBob; I'm  sorry,  Mrs.  Puff!  I'm  sorry! ;s1e9_106
+ Mrs.  Puff ; [panicking]  The  wheel,  SpongeBob!  The  wheel... ;s1e9_107
+SpongeBob; Cheating...  I'm  a  cheater!  Cheater... ;s1e9_108
+ Mrs.  Puff ; No,  no,  no!  It's  quite  alright!  You  can  cheat  that  way! ;s1e9_109
+SpongeBob; No...  I'm  cheating...! ;s1e9_110
+ Mrs.  Puff ; At  least,  SpongeBob... ;s1e9_111
+SpongeBob; I'm  cheating! ;s1e9_112
+ Mrs.  Puff ; Cheat  that  way!  That  way! ;s1e9_113
+SpongeBob; I'm  a  cheater,  cheater,  pumpkin  eater! ;s1e9_114
+ Mrs.  Puff ; It's  okay  to  cheat  today! ;s1e9_115
+SpongeBob;No...!;s1e9_116
+ Mrs.  Puff ; That  way!  That  way!  Cheat  that  way! ;s1e9_117
+SpongeBob; Cheater...!  [crashes  offscreen  head-on  into  the  same  lighthouse.  Mrs.  Puff  inflates  with  a  look  of  despair.  The  lighthouse  falls  yet  again] ;s1e9_118
+ Mrs.  Puff ; [deep  voice]  Oh,  SpongeBob,  why? ;s1e9_119
+SpongeBob; Mrs.  Puff,  I  think  I  cheated. ;s1e9_120
+Fred; My  leg!  [some  time  later,  EMTs  are  wheeling  a  still-inflated  Mrs.  Puff  away  on  a  gurney] ;s1e9_121
+SpongeBob; Uhh,  I'm  sorry  for  letting  you  down  again,  Mrs.  Puff. ;s1e9_122
+ Mrs.  Puff ; [normal  voice]  It's  okay,  SpongeBob,  you  didn't  mean  it.  Okay,  boys,  take  me  away.  [EMTs  shove  Mrs.  Puff  into  the  ambulance] ;s1e9_123
+SpongeBob; Don't  worry,  Mrs.  Puff.  I'll  try  harder  next  semester.  [Mrs.  Puff  cries  as  she  is  taken  away  by  the  ambulance]  It'll  be  great!  [walks  away]  Only  now  I  don't  even  have  my  bike. ;s1e9_124
+Gary; [with  SpongeBob's  unicycle]  Meow. ;s1e9_125
+SpongeBob; Gary!  My  bike!  You  found  it!  This  sponge  is  still  mobile!  [rides  away  on  his  bike  with  Gary  on  his  head]  Alright,  let's  go  surprise  someone  at  the  hospital! ;s1e9_126