How To Live A Life Of Intention
By: Samantha Case
Tags: Intentional Living, Self-awareness, Self Improvement, Meaning, Life Lessons

Amongst the plethora of differences that separate humans from one another, we are all connected by a significant similarity: what many of us crave more than anything is to experience something meaningful and, especially, to live a meaningful life.

What defines “meaningful” is subjective to the opinions and characteristics of each individual, but one thing that consistently contributes to meaningful experiences is the act of weaving intention into every aspect of one’s life.

Being intentional requires an awareness of what’s below the surface of the many components of our lives. Intention begs the question: What drives my thoughts, actions, or beliefs? If our lives are like vehicles moving through life, then intention is the engine that converts energy into motion.

It’s not easy to consistently live with intention. It requires a level of attentiveness and energy that’s easier to do without. To live with intention, you must first want to, and then know how to. Here are seven valuable ways to begin, or continue, living with intention:

Know what’s important and what’s not.

It sounds like common sense, but simply knowing what’s important to you is one of the first steps of living with intention. And in the process of thinking about it, you may find that you spend less time incorporating the important things into your life than you realize. Or, you may learn the opposite which is great as well!

One easy way to become more aware of the important and non-important things is to make a list. Divide a piece of paper into two sides: on one side write “Important” and on the other write “Not Important.” Be thoughtful about what you write, and try to do so in a quiet space with few distractions that might interrupt your thought process.

Also, try not to be judgmental of what you write down. If, for example, you know that scrolling mindlessly through social media isn’t important to you but you know how often you do it, still write it down! It’s okay to knowingly do something that’s not important to you — we all do it. What’s important is simply being aware of it; leave the judgment out.

After you’ve made a list (and it doesn’t have to include every single thing that is and isn’t important to you), then on a separate sheet write why each thing is or isn’t important. If scrolling social media isn’t important, is it because the information you’re consuming is meaningless, is it because you’re losing valuable time that could be spent doing something more fulfilling, or is it something else? Knowing the reason behind what is/isn’t important to you is where intention really lies. If you know the why, you can determine the what.

Be authentic.

What does that even mean?

Being authentic is the same as being genuine — it means knowing what’s important to you and aligning yourself with those things, without compromising them for an external reward, like social approval or financial gain.

An important part of knowing what’s important to you is being aware of your values, which typically represent qualities like honesty, integrity, and loyalty. What do you care about?

Be cognizant that what you once held as a value — say, as a child — might be different than what you value now. It’s important to get clear on your current values because you may be living your life by past values without realizing it. You can keep track of your values by writing them on the same (or different) paper you recorded what’s important to you on.

Once you feel clear about your values and what’s important to you, practice holding yourself accountable to those things. Doing this requires honesty — and again, without judgment. If honesty is a value of yours but you find yourself occasionally or frequently lying to those around you, get curious about that. What is driving your behavior?

Overtime, as you become more aware of your actions and curious about the why that drives your behavior, you’ll naturally begin to align what’s important to you with how you act day-to-day and how you spend your time.

Photo by Brooke Cagle

Practice self-reflection.

If you’ve gotten this far, you’re already practicing self-reflection! Knowing what’s important to you, your values, and aligning your behavior with those things is self-reflection in action.

One important thing to know about self-reflection is that it requires continuous effort. It doesn’t come with an end goal because we’re all humans who are changing, developing, and growing in every moment. Who you were ten years ago is likely very different than who you are now. If you continuously practice self-reflection, then you’ll be mindful of who you are through the transitions of life.

Journaling is one really effective way to practice self-reflection. Through the process of writing, you might come to realize something about yourself that you didn’t know before. However, the act of writing isn’t so much of what generates reflection. Rather, it’s in going back through old journal entries and reading what you wrote several years, or even several months, before.

Though we’re all constantly changing, there are consistent themes that run through our lives over long periods of time. When you observe your mind from a distance (like after several years have passed), you’re no longer as intimately connected to that version of yourself and can therefore learn A LOT about what’s important to you, who you are, and what lessons you’ve learned overtime.

Ask yourself challenging questions.

Journaling also provides an opportunity to ask yourself difficult questions, like “Why do I believe what I believe,” and “Why am I on the career path that I’m on?” Exploring these types of questions is also self-reflection in progress — and, might I add, really powerful reflection that leads to being more authentic and living a more intentional life. You may have noticed all the steps mentioned in this article build on each other.

As I’ve said before, try not to judge yourself for the answers that come through. While pondering why you’re on your particular career path, for example, don’t run away if an answer like “Well, I’m driven by money,” or “Others told me this was a good path to pursue” comes up. It’s important information for you to have on your journey of living a life of intention. The more aware you are of what motivates your thoughts and actions, the more control you have over your life.

Here are a few questions to help get you started:

Why do I believe _____?

Why am I in my current job?

Do I focus more on negative or positive thoughts?

Do I invest enough time and effort into the relationships that matter to me?

Am I proud of the person I am?

Am I living true to myself?

Do I take anything for granted?

Do I take time for the things that are important to me?

Am I generally happy or sad, and why?

Does ____ situation that happened a while ago still impact me negatively?

Remember that answering challenging questions about yourself is a process and not a one-time activity. The more you transparently explore answers to these questions, the more you’ll learn about yourself.

Photo by Brent Gorwin

Change your thoughts.

At this point you’re likely already feeling pretty dang self aware and are therefore well on the path of living life with intention. This is when things get really exciting, because the more aware you become of yourself, the more power you have to be intentional in everything you do, think, and believe.

Part of the excitement is changing your thoughts, which is something that generates results overtime, so try not to be too hard on yourself if your thoughts don’t change immediately (in fact, I can tell you now they most likely won’t). Being intentional about your thoughts is so important because what we think is often what shapes our perception of ourselves and the world.

Our brains get caught in thought patterns. The thoughts we think overtime create quick, go-to routes in our brains. It’s like developing a path in the wilderness. The path isn’t established immediately (unless of course someone is doing some serious hard work on that path). Instead, it turns into a clear path after people have walked on it over and over again.

Our brains aren’t much different. We’re quick to follow thoughts that we’ve had for a long time, like “I have to ____ because that’s what I was told,” or “I can only be happy if ____,” because we’ve created well-worn pathways in our brains.

Rewiring your thoughts is like creating an entirely new path in the wilderness — it takes time and effort, but the results are long-lasting. When you catch yourself in a thought pattern you’re trying to break, stop yourself in the middle of the thought and step over onto the new pathway you’re trying to develop. Before you know it, the old path will be growing over with weeds and you’ll be on a new journey of thinking.

Pay attention.

Yes, pay attention! But to what exactly? We’ve already talked about paying attention to what’s meaningful to you, your values, and your thoughts. What I’m talking about here is paying attention to what’s around you, like mindfulness.

There is always something beautiful near you, no matter where you’re at or what’s going on in your life. The catch is that you have to look out for it because beauty — like a ruby red rose growing in an alleyway — doesn’t typically beg to be seen. If you’re unaware of what’s around you, how can you appreciate it?

Paying attention contributes to an intentional life because you’re taking control of how you experience life. When you become intentional about noticing the simple beauties around you — like the silhouette of tree branches against a setting sun, the gentle harmony of birds chirping outside, or the silent sparkle of fresh snowflakes — it significantly impacts your experience of a meaningful life.

Anything that’s meaningful won’t appear meaningful to you unless you intentionally notice and appreciate that thing for what it is.

Practice gratitude.

Being grateful comes rather naturally when you practice paying attention to things around you. When you notice pleasant things that you didn’t take time to recognize before, you can’t help but feel gratitude for that thing.

That doesn’t mean there aren’t moments when life appears bleak, and you could spend all day paying attention to beauty and still not feel elevated. That’s okay. You don’t have to feel grateful in every single moment of every day. But practicing gratitude regularly leads to greater satisfaction of life in general because, as I mentioned before, you’re building pathways in your brain to naturally appreciate the things around you.

In the morning or at night, practice writing down three things you’re grateful for. If it’s at night, think of three things you’re grateful for that happened that day. Or, if you’re not much of a writer, just simply notice things in the moment. As you spend more time paying attention, do so with gratitude. When you witness something that brings joy, think “I’m thankful for ____.”

Gratitude has the greatest impact on our lives when we practice it in small moments on a consistent basis. Acknowledging that you’re thankful for something is making a choice to recognize it, and therefore choosing to be intentional about your thoughts.

A meaningful life doesn’t come on its own — instead, it’s the product of weaving intention into every aspect of our lives overtime. What each of us craves more than most things, if not all, is a life of meaning, which starts by being intentional about your life in the seven different ways I mentioned above.

Living with intention requires effort, attentiveness, and therefore a desire to want to live in such a way. Being intentional begins with the choice you make to be aware of who you are and the life you’re living. The fact that you read this article is a testament to your willingness to live life on your own terms, in a conscious and meaningful way. More than anything else, I hope you find purpose and meaning along your powerful, life-changing journey of living with intention.

XO