5 Questions I’ll Ask Myself in My Loving-Kindness Diary
By: Phoenix Huber
Tags: Diary, Self Improvement, Love, Writing, Mindfulness

1. When did I love others the strongest?

I woke to a controversial subject. I felt emotions for misunderstood people in a difficult situation. I revisited an article draft I’d previously started abound this issue. In the end, I consciously set aside this message of compassion. We’ll simmer till it feels wise to share, soon.

Stuck to my appointments and spent time with people today!

I cleaned the kitchen before bed so we could start the week decent. Also, I signed myself up to scrub the floors this week. Curse you, altruistic instincts!

There were moments I wanted to pity and/or avoid someone today. Minding those feelings, I remembered others would lament my situation— even though I’m doing great in many ways. People get used to their lot no matter how much “worse” or “better” it compares.

If I put you on too high a pedestal or too low a stoop, I try to recall it’s all relative. What matters is not my assessment, but what each person feels and desires for their own life. My job as a friend and family member is to keep listening.

2. When was I kind to myself?

At exactly 9pm as communicated, I ended a text conversation. 9 is my wind-down-for-bed time (no more electronics). I walked back to the kitchen where I’d been gorging and planning to sneak a few more bites, but I immediately remembered 9pm is my cutoff for eating food too!

It wasn’t hard to put that food away. I’d gone enough consecutive 9pms that losing my streak was out of the question. I was kind to my health without even trying!

Another thing: I played today.

One of my friends brought this up in regards to dance… Later, I “danced” in a roleplay chat. Just like old times when I was in Theatre school, I guess. :) Then as I straightened up the kitchen, I imagined I was on stage. This gave grace and precision to my gestures. I turned off the lights to head downstairs and thought, “End of scene.”

3. When did others express loving-kindness?

A family member voiced concern about an upcoming trip. The whole family was immediate in intercommunicating till we solved the issue. We made a safer plan that pleased everyone.

Friends asked me great questions and gave words of appreciation.

A certain someone keeps saying to write a book! I always wrote it off that I wasn’t ready, but today they suggested it one too many times and light bulbs lit up. Thank you! Oh, and said person takes amazing care of their spouse every day! They are a constant altruism model for me to pay attention to.

Secrets of the Zoo was on the telly today. Here’s National Geographic TV’s official summary:

With 2,000 employees, 10,000 animals, 6,000 veterinary cases and more than 100 animal births each year, Secrets of the Zoo tells the dramatic, heartwarming and often hilarious stories of the wildlife, and wild people, that it takes to create a loving and healthy landscape for the animals and animal lovers alike.

I haven’t zooed since I was little. I figure the animals don’t require my presence, I don’t know how they all got there, and it’s weird thinking of them as “an exhibit.”

But regardless of how I’d view each zoo if I researched to weigh the ups and downs…

Secrets was a show about altruism. The zookeepers tended to each individual animal’s happiness, while having fun amongst themselves. I loved the vibe! The humans and hyenas equally inspired me.

Now humanity just needs to help animals as best we can for their sake. Right now, we treat nonhumans very differently based on whether they’re a dog or cat, a zoo resident, a wild animal “pest,” a prisoner in a laboratory, or a chicken destined for nugget status.

Gah, I’m sorry, that was a sad joke. *tear* Although I’m super heartened to see all the plant-based and/or “secretly half veggie” chicken nugget and burger commercials lately!

Meanwhile, I pray hard that cell-based meat scientists will someday end the demand for slaughterhouses. Rant complete.

4. How would my role models evaluate my day?

Among my role models are the types who hang out on effective altruism forums. They’re research geeks who guesstimate how we can make the greatest positive difference.

“Doing Good Better” is a book title which basically sums up the idea!

Honestly, I procrastinate getting into EA because I’m comfortable with artsy, emotion-driven storytellers who use lots of heart emojis. ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

For now, this Hufflepuff will “invoke” the Ravenclaws’ imaginary feedback:

I had spare moments when I was idle or I distracted myself. Recapture those moments with cleaning! It gives me more energy anyway.

When my writing focus fizzles, 10 minutes of meditation could more than pay off in productivity! Same for exercise.

Try to swap some of my light reading with topics that will teach me.

It’s Monday now. Let’s see what we can do.

5. Laughter relief: What was your horrible Joke of the Day?

Here’s a 5th question I could ask myself in my love diary, just for comic relief! Dire warning: You are about to get “rear-ended” by my truly dreadful sense of Huber.

“You’re always the damsel in distress!” he texted me.

“I’m not always a damsel in distress!” I insisted. “I’ll have you know I cook lentils all by myself. Butt then I need saving from my own bad gas.

Sometimes when friends text you insensitive comments, you just have to turn the other cheek.

FYI: Time to try soaking the lentils and cook them in my new pressure cooker with baking soda! I heard those things are supposed to help. ^_^

To be continued…