Whose Pride is it anyway?
Tags: Pride, India, Revolution, Protest, Politics

It’s been nine months and one week since my last post, Interweb denizens. I have gestated an idea, nurtured it in the womb of my mind, composed it of my own flesh and blood, and now, after carrying it to term, I am ready to splay it all over my computer screen for all the world to see.

I present to you: a post.

If you fell for that cockamamie nonsense in the first paragraph, you clearly don’t know me and therefore do not deserve to read this post. But also you are probably one of a handful of readers here so in the interest of charity (and validation of the self) I will let you stay. Remember to tell your children and your grandchildren about the generous, slightly mentally absent, stranger who allowed you access to fine literary content. You are welcome. I am the next Dalai Lama (but for real: Free Tibet!)

Nah. I haven’t written anything here because fuck my life. There is so much that has happened in the past nine months that I couldn’t possibly update you, least of all in an intro to a post that has nothing to do with the happenings in my life.

…

Rapid fire update of Anirudh’s life since May 6, 2019:



1. Got attacked by an American Pit Bull Terrier

2. DESTROYED any chance of a deep relationship with Warm Cutie

3. Replaced cohabitation partner

4. QUIT MY JOB, Y’ALL!

5. Found a buncha new yummies to fill the gaping void in the centre of my chest where love and faith in humanity used to once reside

6. Started freelancing (semi-successfully)

7. Moved houses

8. Confronted my drinking problem (while drunk; I’ve been told it doesn’t count, but I am queer so I can’t count anyway. Checkmate, rationalists!)

Image shows Anirudh’s progress in life over the past nine months (colourised).

This is just my life and the personal shit going down (and a non-exhaustive list at that, but since I am already exhausted, I shan’t bother with more. Tea, please!). I feel like you also need to be informed about all the political crap happening in the country, but I will save that for my (guaranteed, for sure, definitely in the works, will be here before you know it) next post. For now, though, it’s time for my favourite pastime: shitting on Mumbai queers!

I know what a bunch of y’all are going to say: something something infighting among the queer community is leading to the movement getting more fractionated, thereby making our collective voice that much weaker something something. And whereas I agree that we should have each others’ backs a lot more, Mumbai’s gay men are such a heaping pile of nasty trash that I just have to have a go at this mess.

I am duty bound.

So, who are these delicate fucking flowers (name shamelessly stolen from the Insta handle of one of the best people in the world. Don’t be a little shit: go follow the account) and why am I trying to rip them a new one? For those who are familiar with Queerness™ and with the living nightmare that is Indian Politics™, this ramble won’t be hard to follow. For those of you who have the bliss of ignorance on your side, strap in for what is going to be a clusterfuck narrative.

This be you. Eerily accurate prediction of your thoughtses and feelses is eerie.

Indian politics is a maelstrom of shit right now, to put it as mildly as possibly. The central government has decided to unfurl its peacock tail of saffron feathers for all the world to see. Chief among the problems clogging the toilet that is our democracy is the issue of citizenship (as much as I want to link you to articles for further reading purposes, there is just too much content out there. Google “CAA India” or “Anti-CAA Protest”. Launch yourself down the rabbit hole. Come back with outrage). Yes, that is, in fact, as outlandishly ridiculous as it sounds: the citizenship of the people in the largest democracy in the world has become a plaything of partisan, communal politics. Happy days!

Naturally, people are pissed off, and everyone, (like, everyone, even the apoliticals) has been protesting. Turns out people don’t like it when you tell them that their rights to citizenship are now the decision of a fascist government; or when you shoot at students in a goddamn university campus; or when you arrest people on trumped up charges and deny them medical care; or when you call protesting women prostitutes who have been bought and paid for by the opposition; or when you let the police massacre a state — people do not like it!

Who knew, indeed!

Everyone except, you guessed it, The Gays of Mumbai™. Cis-gay men, in general, are literal scum, but when it comes to places like Mumbai, the scummy nature is at its Zenith. This scumminess, it would seem, is contagious — it is spreading at an alarming rate to other identities under the queer umbrella. This scum cocktail (I was going to go for “scum fest” but decided that “cocktail” was the better word when talking about gay men, for obvious reasons) recently held a (their words, not mine) Pride.

True to nature, the Pride (sigh) was a shitshow. Mumbai police denied permission for the March (citing possible risk of “anti-CAA” and “Free Kashmir” sloganeering at the march), suggesting that they instead have the Pride as a gathering in a location that is the dumping ground of Mumbai resistance. The organisers, of course, complied with the police, which, fine, even if it is a little pissing off is kinda sorta understandable (not really, since Pride is a protest, and we are in a time when the Indian police is quite literally killing peaceful protesters willy nilly). What doesn’t go down at all is their attitude towards the Pride, and the events that transpired.

Basically how I see cis-gay men in urban metros

The Gays of Mumbai™ are a cornerstone of that cadre of queers who think that Pride is not political and spew such gems as “Pride is a celebration! Don’t bring in non-LGBT issues into Pride! Why do you not love the freedom you have? Get off me!” (that last one is an embellishment, but also, often, a direct quote). Sure enough, they stuck to their privileged fucked-uppery, and when there were revolutionary slogans raised during the Pride (sigh), as there are bound to be because Pride is a protest, you limp dick pieces of shit, the organisers had the audacity to go ahead and publish this:

And now everyone hates the queers. Thanks for nothing, QAM, you privileged pieces of fecal matter

This kind of tail-between-the-legs attitude is to be expected from this crowd, honestly, but whereas earlier it was an issue because they were selling out the entire community to their Hindutva and Corporate overlords, it is now a veritable inferno. This free ejaculation of cowardice from Queer Azadi Mumbai has resulted in the entire country losing faith in the queer community, which is horrid considering that the trans folks of India have, quite literally, been at the forefront of all social justice struggles in the country. Cis-gay men in India go about calling Pride a celebration, riding on the coattails of the reading down of Section 377, a judgement that makes little difference on the ground and, more significantly, a “victory” that was gotten for them by the goddamn trans folk!

Oh, it has also resulted in the detention and arrest of multiple people who were at the Pride (sigh) whether or not they were shouting slogans, because QAM (allegedly. I am obligated to say allegedly even though I don’t wanna) cooperated with the police in order to help them identify the sloganeers. All of this to show… something. Show what, exactly?

The best thing to come out of this: Buncha queer folks around the country distancing themselves from QAM and the bullshit that is this Hindutva-fed, Hindu-sympathetic, corporate stooge queer politics.

Fucking finally

Pride, and hopefully queer politics as a whole, in India is showing signs of moving away from the sad mimicry of white cis-gay nonsense that it has sadly become. Yo, gaybies of Mumbai and other BIG™ cities: get your head out of your (and your equally white pandering boyfriends’) asses and be a part of the revolution. Or, if your delicate manicures and fragile egos won’t allow you to do that, get the fuck out of our way.

Queerness in India has always been vocal and individual and political, and pigs will fly before we let Savarna, upper class, cis-gay men take that away from us. It’s time, now, to let the world know that India’s queeple are in solidarity with the oppressed and the marginalised, and that we are not scared, or limited in our concern, or ungrateful for the efforts of our allies. We are here to state, without hesitation, that the Pride is ours — us who believe in the ideals of equality for all, us who are not shy of resistance, us who will herald the revolution.