“What to do with my life?” — How to Get Unstuck
By: Robert Berberian
Tags: Life Hacking, Career Advice, How To, Life Lessons, Motivation

While our circumstances at times might just be out of our control, our work ethic or our drive is not. If you allow yourself to stay comfortable, you will always do what’s comfortable. And if the people closest to you don’t rattle your behavior, you’ll stay like that for years. Right now you’re probably experiencing an overwhelming time and you can’t seem to figure your next move. You feel STUCK. You just don’t know what you should be doing with your time to get you over your roadblocks.

So what do you do? You feel you’ve tried enough, saw no immediate results and so you stopped trying. Overtime, you tried to rationalize and justify your shortcomings by developing a sense of entitlement. You convince yourself that you’re worthy of more, when you haven’t really done much.

The problem is we seem to think we deserve to have things handed to us. Which makes us reluctant to really put in work for anything and that adds to our tendency to procrastinate.

Procrastination is what fuels that ‘one-day’ mind state. Basically, by telling ourselves that we will ‘do’ something, we ease the part of our mind that feels the need to actually DO and basically end up doing nothing.

People start to procrastinate when they start getting overconfident, intimidated or frustrated. Think about it, procrastination is not actually about being overworked; it’s more about putting off work. So, think about the last time you procrastinated — why did you do it?

Whatever your reason may be, the feeling of being stuck and not progressing in different areas of your life is not all to blame on your circumstances. Majority of this is because of choices, decisions and actions.

Thoughts -> Feelings

Feelings -> Actions

Actions -> Results

The expectancies of life can end up making you sideline your own dreams, and will have you lose yourself to the chaos if you allow it. Deep down, we all have areas of our lives we’d like to change but what we haven’t talked about is how we’re going to start that change.

Every journey is going to be different; there are some basic things that stay the same in every person’s journey to self-realization. For example, the most common mistake that people make is they look for a ‘magical solution’. What I mean is that we have a tendency to ignore the fact that our problems did not just magically appear one fine morning, but yet we somehow expect that there will be a magical solution for them.

It’s kind of like, “Hey, I know something went wrong, so what is that one thing I can do to fix it and get back to the person I wanted to be?”

Well, first off — there is no one thing.

Expecting an instant fix to a problem that is years in the making is possibly the most illogical thing a person could expect, and yet, I was that person.

For almost 3 years, I went into therapy and then quit because therapy wasn’t giving me a solution. I felt I didn’t see the type of change I was looking for. In retrospect, I was so impatient and ready to be the type of person I wanted to be, that I wasn’t embracing what was being said to me. I wanted a solution, so I can apply it quickly and get over this feeling of being stuck. But what I didn’t realize until now was, I was being guided to change my way of thinking, my daily habits and approach. As a result, that is what will help you work your way out of your struggles.

For things to change for you, you’ve got to change.

— Jim Rohn

What ever your reason may be, it’s important to understand that deciding not to decide is a decision! Every time you put off a goal, you’re not just saying “not now” you are saying “no”. This is only because by telling yourself you will “do it later” you are saying no minus the actual consequences that come with it.

Less talk, more implementation.

Remember — you matter. Who you want to be matters. Which means as of this moment, every choice, every excuse, every delay matters — make sure you are doing what is right for you. There is opportunity everywhere and with the right commitment and intention, you will find what you’re looking for.