Helping women get comfortable with receiving
By: Medha Murtagh
Tags: Gifts, Acceptance, Feminism, Women, Womens Rights

Oron Speaks

The first thing we want to say is that the process of mothering and being a mother, particularly when the offspring is a baby, is very much one of giving.

If you think about it more deeply, although the male contributes sperm and DNA, the woman creates a child from within herself, from within her resources. The child is made from the mother, within the mother, using the resources of the mother. And when the child is first born that child will be literally dependent on the giving of the mother for the milk and sustenance for life.

The emotional sensitivity, generous nature and the experience of mothering creates an idea that has been socialised into your culture and therefore reinforced over time of women as givers. There is also something deeper beneath all of this that makes it difficult for women to ask for help and receive it in an open way that does not feel like debt to them.

Underlying the difficulty in asking for help and receiving it is often a feeling of unworthiness.

The feeling of unworthiness creates the sense that if you are going to receive you also need to give. You do not want to be a burden, you want to be more of a contributor. So in order to encourage women who wish to be more open to receiving help, we would encourage a reconnection to the value of the self.

We would encourage women to go into their own space, to go into their own hearts and really tear down the walls that they have built between them and their own self-love, knowing that when they connect to their own self-love all they are doing is adding fuel to the love that they give to others.

There is no benefit to feeling unworthy.

There is no benefit to feeling less lovable than anyone else on the planet. And yet this is something that people in general and women often carry within them. If you are generally open-hearted, if you are generally generous, if you are naturally living in accordance with who you are, you will be generous. But you will also have no hesitation in receiving the generosity of others. There is a misalignment, a lack of balance when you are more ready and willing to give than you are to receive.

You deserve help.

You deserve love.

You deserve support.

You deserve to be accommodated.

You deserve to be prioritised.

And the moment you start to experience that for yourself, within yourself, about yourself, the more you will be ready and willing to receive it from the external.

The socialisation in your culture reinforces this idea of ‘feminine as mother’. But it is not necessary and it is, in fact, time to break the pattern. Women are givers and women are receivers and it is when they receive in a balanced way that they are more able to give.

It is unfortunate that the most productive way of encouraging women to receive more is to let them know that that will then be able to give more. But it is not really a problem, and it is an easy access point from which to begin. But we would advise you to not stop there. We want you to be open and willing to receive — receive help, receive love, receive all of the good things.

Receive, receive, receive. Receiving is your natural state.

The same way you receive the air that you breathe, you are able, willing and encouraged at the deepest level to receive. It is your programming, your thoughts, your beliefs about yourself that prevent you from living from that place of open receiving. But you can get there if you choose and it does not have to be difficult. It does not have to be hard.

Be there for yourself. Give to yourself. Train yourself to receive from yourself regularly and in an unlimited unconditional capacity and that is the training ground for receiving from others.

You are not a burden when you receive, just as those that you give to are not a burden to you when you give from a balanced place. When you give from a place of not being balanced the experience is different for the receiver and the experience is different for you.

Receive, receive, receive. Be open to receive. Be open to becoming open to receive. Not just help, but everything. You deserve everything. You deserve all of the good things. We know that you can open your heart to experience yourself as the deserving being that you are.

We love you. We love you. We love you. Go well.