Valentine’s Day Was Much Better as a Kid
By: Kim Mckinney
Tags: Relationships, Love, This Happened To Me, Life, Self

Valentine’s Day Was Much Better as a Kid

The innocence of love

Photo by Kaboompics .com from Pexels

Valentine’s Day was approaching. My mother went out and found the most economical combo package of Valentine cards for each of my siblings and me. Money was always tight with five kids, but this was essential.

Cards went to everyone in our class, at least from my family they did. It didn’t matter if we liked the kid or not. They would get a card. Mom insisted.

I usually liked everyone, my brothers were typically the ones who only wanted to give a few cards, but there was a status to each card I carefully picked. I’d take the list of classmates that my teacher gave us (mimeographed, of course), and my best friend Carole’s card would be selected first. She got the prettiest with the most special saying. “2 Nice 2 B 4gotten” or something like that.

My best male friend, Dale, came next. Tricky because he deserved a great card, but not one that would make people think I “like liked” him. Funny usually worked.

And then there was my secret crush. There usually was one. No one ever knew who he was. Even my best friend. This card selection took a lot of thought. Something so he may know I liked him if he liked me, but not make him think I liked me if he didn’t like me. Note that this same logic has carried throughout my life, and may be a reason I remain single.

The selection process continued until I got to the annoying people, usually boys, for whom I picked the ickiest cards. Of course, these cards were all so generic no one would ever guess what you thought the icky cards were, but you knew. That was enough.

When we arrived at school on Valentine’s Day, we secretly delivered all valentines into the appropriate Valentine’s box for each student. We’d usually make these boxes the week before. Shoe boxes covered with hearts and our name prominently displayed. My lack of crafting ability was evident even way back then, but it served its purpose.

We couldn’t open them at school. The teachers worried for kids who may not receive as many cards as others. We’d take them home and tear into them. It was an exciting, heart-racing time.

Some of the kids with wealthy parents would include a box of conversation hearts, or maybe a heart-shaped cherry sucker. On rare occasions, there may be a chocolate heart.

You’d go through and check out every card. A few people made beautiful ones with construction paper and doilies. These always held me in awe. Most were of the multi-pack variety that my family favored.

That boy you were crushing on? What did his card to you say? Could he “like you-like you”? You’d try to interpret. It never occurred to me that he would probably have the same non-committed attitude as my brothers, who wrote valentines out indiscriminately and by force due to our mother.

On occasion, you wouldn’t receive one from someone. That usually resulted in a call to your best friend. Did they receive one from that person? If not it was fine. They probably didn’t give out valentines for some reason. If she did receive one, why did they neglect you? Yep, it broke my heart a little. Until I got back to loving all the ones I did receive.

Oh, the angst of babes. Funny how it continues into adulthood.

I remember that time with a smile. The kids who ignored me? While then it was the end of the world, now I don’t even remember. Those who gave me really cool cards or that box of conversation hearts? I don’t remember them either. It’s just the overall feeling that remains.

Now I think of the adults. The teachers who made it special, but also didn’t want kids rejected publicly. The room mothers, including my own, who brought the party food and made a school day so festive and special. The parents like mine, who even then were teaching inclusion, even if we didn’t quite fully get it.

I tend to look at Valentine’s day with a bit of humor these days. I love seeing how people celebrate, how they don’t, and even how a few put more weight on this arbitrary day than it is due.

But if Valentine’s Day is a struggle for you this year, I’m putting a card in your box. U R 2 amazing 2 B 4gotten. Believe it, live it, and don’t let the day overwhelm you. Celebrate loving you. You’re worth it.