Being Intentional With Money
By: Cora Kessler
Tags: Mindfulness, Personal Finance, Money Management, Money Mindset

Money, money, money…

Some say it’s the root of all evil. I’d amend that to add that the absence of consciousness around money when it is viewed as a signifier of self-worth, is the root of much of the pain in the world… so a bit of a change to the original.

Over the last few years and particularly this past year, I’ve been on a quest to develop more consciousness around my relationship with money. Any outsider that looked at my accounts would say my finances were in order– I’ve been saving, putting away for retirement, and always paid my credit cards on time. So what did I need to improve upon?

I wanted to better understand what drives my spending habits (insecurity? generosity? boredom?) and to develop clear saving goals so that I can better prioritize my casual spending. I often felt I was found myself in situations where spending was a byproduct of the situation I had joined. I was spending, spending, spending for social engagements at restaurants, bars, and malls that I had passively decided to go to. In other words, I put myself in a position to spend when it wasn’t necessarily in line with my financial goals or more importantly my larger personal values.

Checking your spending is a powerful way to check if you are living in alignment with your values! I fell into a rhythm of nonchalantly spending on superficial items that didn’t speak to my soul’s values. Yes, buying a new shirt might take away from larger savings towards a future vacation, but more importantly, if I did decide to dedicate that same amount of money in a more conscious way, I could pay for an inspiring art class, moving concert, profound talk, or healthful food that nourishes and speaks to my soul.

The way many people learn about and discuss personal finance is based on an unhealthy way of thinking about the concept as a whole. Broke is cool and cute in your twenties, house poor is understandable and encouraged in your thirties, and pre-retirement anxiety sets in when you hit forty or fifty. While there are many contributing factors to this trend, some of which require large scale shifts on the federal level, some of these changes can be made culturally. We are conditioned as a society to normalize over-spending and it takes confidence and reflection to say, “no, thanks!” to spend when it’s not necessary. I’m not arguing that we all have to pinch pennies all day and live in fear. Spend all day, simply spend in places you feel matter. I’ve found there is a certain power and clarity in choosing to honor the places we choose to put our dollars.

I noticed that my two biggest unnecessary spending areas were shopping and going out with friends. Now, does that mean I never buy myself new clothes or enjoy a meal out now that I’m more hip to my spending practices? No way! I am simply conscious of where I tend to spend money and can now make better-informed choices. I used to go thrifting to kill time between work and my evening film course. This was a horrible idea for two reasons, 1) My New York apartment couldn’t handle my awesome wardrobe. 2) I was positioning myself to spend money that I didn’t need to spend because I was bored.

One of the reasons this personal audit has been so helpful for me is to develop a habit of spending money consciously so I’m not throwing it away and instead, leveraging my dollar towards values that reflect my highest self. Some of these are standard 1950’s financial wisdom, like buying a home, saving for retirement, and personal travel. While the grey area of casual spending has been more challenging to pinpoint, I’ve found that spending towards my values when possible, makes me feel the weight and worth of my finances in a really positive way.

Resources:

This podcast episode by Dear Sugar, entitled, Cutting The Financial Cord, offers a unique perspective for anyone trying to ease their way to financial independence.

Also, the below clip is an inspiring interview between Oprah and Lynne Twist on the topic of value-based spending. Highly recommend!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8aVxpwGahy8