Confessions of a workaholic
By: Kat Nieh
Tags: Self Improvement, Work Life Balance, Life Lessons, Burnout, Mindset

Confessions of a workaholic

Photo by Thought Catalog on Unsplash

Hi. I’m Kat, and I’m a workaholic… to my core

It feels like a quality that was ingrained in me little by little — seeds planted by my parents, encouraged by society, and deeply reinforced by the tech work culture.

Through my own experience, I’ve learned to see workaholics in a different light. We are just people with strong work ethics who laser-focused all our passion into one single area of life––work.

Duh, right?

But it’s the reasoning that triggered my curiosity…

To dive deeper into what I discovered, I want to share with you one of the biggest challenges I still face with my workaholic tendencies: Getting sucked into the goal-driven vortex of passion and dedication that often leads to burn out.

It’s easy for me to focus all of my passion into what I’m working on because I know I can excel there. It’s comfortable. It’s familiar. I know what I need to do in order to get the results I want.

When highly focused in my work mode, these are the times where it seems like the rest of the world just fades away. Multitasking isn’t even on my mind. During my worst moments of being a workaholic, work was just easier compared to other areas of my life. The rest of it just seemed to take more effort, especially in the areas I wanted to avoid. (Anyone else turns a blind eye with procrastination, too?)

That extreme dedication to work was actually my escapism. I didn’t want to face the challenges and struggles elsewhere in my life, so I just dove deeper and deeper into work where it was effortless in comparison.

I had to drastically change my life to break the pattern. I had to do this for myself — in whatever way I could — for my own well being. I had to start facing and treating the areas of my life I’ve been avoiding as if they were work challenges I knew I can overcome.

I channeled my workaholic energy into a superpower to change my life.

I’m not perfect

It took courage to address the challenges and discomfort. I had to be patient and go at it at my own pace. It really, really sucked at times, but I dug my heels in and kept at it.

I had to let go of my perfectionism and the guilt and shame of not having it all figured out. Mentally and emotionally, I felt so much better when I stopped striving to be “perfect”. It’s more about the progress I’ve made along the way than doing something perfectly the first time around. (It was such a relief.)

New behaviors that made all the difference

More self-compassion to give yourself the permission to make mistakes and learn from them. (That’s where the growth is!) Take the smallest step to get started and use the results as feedback on how to continue forward.

to give yourself the permission to make mistakes and learn from them. (That’s where the growth is!) Take the smallest step to get started and use the results as feedback on how to continue forward. Increased hyper-awareness to reel yourself back when approaching the edge of burn out. (Quick, emergency doses of self care must be administered!) You know what it feels like when you’re almost there. Choose to stop your old patterns than just charging forward blindly.

to reel yourself back when approaching the edge of burn out. (Quick, emergency doses of self care must be administered!) You know what it feels like when you’re almost there. Choose to stop your old patterns than just charging forward blindly. Dedicated space for yourself to just sit in and process any fear and discomfort, instead of avoiding them. (You’ve gotta face it in order to get over it!) We don’t do this enough. Instead, we keep ourselves busy to avoid our feelings. And you know that doesn’t solve the deeper issues.

for yourself to just sit in and process any fear and discomfort, instead of avoiding them. (You’ve gotta face it in order to get over it!) We don’t do this enough. Instead, we keep ourselves busy to avoid our feelings. And you know that doesn’t solve the deeper issues. Redirect your passion to other areas of your life to create a better overall quality of life. It feels uneasy and second nature at times, but the benefits far outweigh all the tough moments.

Even if it seems much easier and more predictable, I knew I needed more than work to feel fulfilled. I had to make a conscious effort to regain control of my life and redistribute my passion into other things that truly make me happy. (Yes, even if it meant I had to make the extra effort to do so.)

My perspective and choices have changed so much since my burnout

I am not waiting for retirement for life to begin.

I am not driven to define my self worth by my work.

I am not relying on outside sources for approval.

I am healthier––mentally, emotionally, and physically.

I choose to better myself everyday.

I love my life.

This is what I want for you, too.

I want you to reignite your passion for life. I want you to take control of your life for no one else but you. I want you to expand your horizons and redirect your passion and amazing dedication to living your best life.

I want you to choose yourself.

I want you to love your life.

More importantly, I want you to do this all in your own way by powerfully making this decision for yourself.

Go ahead and claim it for yourself. You got this!