Why care about yourself first?
By: Eman Zahra
Tags: Growth, Self Care, Pyschological Safety, Fearless, Self-awareness

Why care about yourself first?

Take care of yourself!

How soothing are these words when somebody says that to you? Realize how flustered you are when someone asks you to take care of yourself and you know that person loves you, but can you be a person who loves yourself when needed?

Today, the earth is an arena where bemoaning the hardships of life is a very active and competitive sport, among the players there are those who are so tired of the everyday world and its problems that they are ready even to give up on their lives. Do you ever sit there and wonder, Why?

Probably not because today or tomorrow you may feel like them or become one of them. Humans today have gone blindly mad afterworld, money, success, power, and fame that they often forget to take care of themselves and end up as clients to some psychiatrist, heart specialist, or neurosurgeon.

Oh people, why can’t you just give your sympathetic nervous system a break?

Do you want to know the reason why that glass in the magician’s hand never empties but the one in your hand does? Allow me to tell you why: A human being is born with a natural instinct to help others because it makes him happy and relieved. This fact was proved by a statistical result published a Belgian publisher Fredric Micas. According to the stats in 2018, over 14 thousand psychologists were registered in the country, while in 2013 less than 8.4 thousand mental health specialists were officially registered in Belgium.

Today, there are thousands of people out there ready to help others because they never got the help they needed so they try to help others but how long can they do so?

“ A patient can never heal a patient.” Eventually the loving and helping human being turns into an abominating and despising maniac . What is it that makes him turn out like that? How long can a super pressurized pot stay on the gas?

It’s the lack of self-awareness. It’s not knowing the fact that ‘ I need to heal myself first ‘. It’s not knowing that I also deserve to lead a happy life. People today fall for the false notion that only another human being can make him happy. No fall out of this taboo. Nobody I repeat nobody is responsible for your happiness but you. Nobody can take care of yourself best but you. You know what you want, you know what your heart craves, give it that. Face the most life-changing experiences standing next to yourself. Of course, that doesn’t mean forget the world but yes keep the world second to yourself.

The next question that might arise in your mind would be ‘ What are the people going to say? They will think I am a self-centered maniac! ‘

Hold up! hold up! Did they even bother about what you will think when they make such a comment? Probably not, so why are you?

The road to self -care is never easy but it’s a road with success in the end. You are never going to regret it any day later. You may feel lost, alone and sad sometimes but it’s a road that promises the most beautiful destination.

So, here are some important reasons why you should take care of yourself first, and before offering a helping hand to anybody next to you:

· A broken car is always pulled by a fueled car.

I am sure you’ve often seen a car broken down in the middle of the road pulled by a trailer. What does this everyday simple example teach you? You can’t support your loved ones if you can’t even help yourself. The world will attack you with every weapon they can but it’s you who needs to know what you need to make yourself walk on the right path. You can only help people if you yourself have your life sorted out or it will only be a torturing and tiring journey for you and the person or loved one that you need to or want to help. That’s why airlines always advise you to put on your own oxygen mask before assisting others.

· An irritable beast knows “chaos” only.

If you are a young man trying to help out his family and solving their financial problems, a man going out to do a 9–5 job to make a mighty living for his family, a housewife giving her all for the well-fare of the family, a child working day and night trying to chase his dreams and making his family feel proud of him. But, what if one day you lose your calm and can’t hold on anymore? It’ll just be chaotic. You have a cantankerous desire to destroy everything you can. This is often the point where you lose the aura of a “helper”. At this point, you are going to hurt the people around you the worst. People often suffer “Burn-out Syndrome” when they are so done with their busy life that it makes them feel constantly stressed because they forget to take care of themselves first. A recent Statista survey found that 14 percent of respondents aged 18 to 29 years knew a relative or close friend who was diagnosed with burnout.

https://www.statista.com/topics/2099/stress-and-burnout/

· Whole world isn’t your parents.

Just like your parents are there to tell you how you are doing it wrong, the whole world won’t offer that helping hand to you. Get a hold of yourself and learn the way it works. Assure yourself that you are fine because no other person is going to do that for you although exceptions exist for some. Never put yourself in the state of mind where you think that you caring for yourself is a self-centered mindset. There is a highly recommended book written by Swenson M.D, “MARGIN”.

“I found in my research that the biggest reason people aren’t more self-compassionate is that they are afraid they’ll become self-indulgent. They believe self-criticism is what keeps them in line. Most people have gotten it wrong because our culture says being hard on yourself is the way to be.” -Kristen Neff

Tools to take care of yourself?

Check out the most awesome tips about self-care approved by science: https://greatist.com/happiness/ways-to-practice-self-care#tl;dr

Periodically checking yourself is mandatory. If you do not then you may not realize that things are getting out of hand. Checking in with yourself will allow you to realize things that make you sad so you can avoid focusing on such things and zoom on the things that make you realize self-worth.

Always remember it’s a “NOW OR NEVER” situation so make sure you start now!