Where is Your Voice?
By: Amanda Young
Tags: Self-awareness, Journaling, Contemplation, Christianity, Self Love

Photo by Jessica F. on Unsplash

So, where do you feel most liberated? Is it in the quiet of a summer evening stroll? Or is it snuggled under the covers late at night with the canopy of darkness to mask any sense of remaining reality from the day before? Maybe you find it in the comfort of your home or in the space of a significant other. For me, I find my voice in the late hours of the afternoon looking out my window and listening to the lo-fi hip hop radio on Youtube.

I think that it’s important both as a young Asian-American woman but also as a developing Christian woman to figure out how I thrive best and in which spaces. Sometimes I feel like I can be isolated from the world and truly live the life of a dandelion — with parts of me floating away into the blue sky of possibility. Other times I feel like I need to be in motion and in company of those that inspire me and push me to do better than what I’m doing now. Either way, they’re both me and they’re both beautiful.

But my voice is something different and is a completely new beast that I have yet to tame. Especially my public voice. I can write in as many incomplete journals as I want to, but to write in a space that is seen by others — that takes courage and a conviction that I am willing to fight for these beliefs. It is the knowledge that some will resonate, while others will turn away from my ideas and my way of speaking. Here, I hope to write my own self-accountability list:

(1) This space is for me to grow in how I vocalize my thoughts but also to grow in my understanding of how I came to the beliefs I have currently.

(2) I will write about all things contemplative — from post-nap revelations to long-held yet never written convictions.

(3) I will always try to reign my thoughts back to a place of love and open-mindedness. I know that I have a long journey ahead of me in debunking each privilege I’ve been given throughout this lifetime, but I hope that through my words God can work wonders in revealing the potential for change.

Accountability is a funny thing because unless you believe in every hidden crevice of your heart that what you are being held accountable for is true, then it probably won’t work. But today I’ve just been watching these Instagram live stories with conversations between powerful Black women such as Ijeoma Oluo and young social activists — and I felt extra compelled to write about where my story may tie into the world of activism.

I’ve never considered myself to be an activist, and yet I’ve always had this longing to write about things that can move and shape the world. So my platform is blogging, which is essentially like a higher tier of journaling. But activism is found in every way, shape, and form of human communication. Maybe it’s social media or maybe it’s a hidden passion for creating art and calligraphy. We each are gifted in the image of God with these talents that are superior to any sort of man-made machine. To utilize those gifts means to uplift not only the oppressed, but to glorify the “highest” in the kingdom of heaven.

Just as Psalms 138:6 states, “Though the Lord is on high, yet He regards the lowly; but the proud He knows from afar.”