BODY HATE FREE ZONE !
By: Anusha Ravilla
Tags: Body Positive, Body Shaming, Self Improvement, Body Image, Self-awareness

what does a beauty standard norm mean to you?

Too fair, too tanned, too skinny or a little curvier?

Or freckle free, acne-free, pigmentation free?

Just halt and ask for yourself.

Welcome, we have a civilization hyping the totality.

I have always been exceedingly conscious of how I look. As a child, I was embarrassed about the way I look or communicate. All of us have had that aunty Ji or even an elder who was very close to us mumble at least one unpleasant utterance.A young heart is fragile and it assumes and imbibes. Most of our self-esteem issues stem from childhood roots.

I was on the chubbier side, I wore round glasses “ soda buddi ” as they would say and I was ridiculed at every damn chance for several years . It did affect me and till date, it affects me. It is an old trauma that keeps lingering no matter how dolled up I am for the day.

It can also be the reason why we don’t take any compliments to the heart or we serially deny it .

My brain kids me into – “hahaha fool baby they must be lying or being nice to you.”It was conditioned to think that there is something wrong with me and I was comparing myself all over.

Most men and women relate to this habitat, right?

I was immensely conscious of talking about any of it. I would preferably cover it up with a “ filter”. I always preferred to fake flawlessness. Conceal it with a highlighter and pull on the game.

what is your reason for not addressing any of these issues in your heart?

Are you scared of judgement or not meeting the standards? Do you feel you are the only one imperfect or everyone around seems to be perfectly perfect?

I am scared to talk to any of those “ aunty Ji” who starts with

That subtle art of body shaming. A very subtle form.

But I am sure “ this comes under the classification of demonstrating their care and affection ” according to them.

but hold on aunty Ji we all have a mirror at home and what is the requisite to point it over and intensify it again?

Of late we notice prominent brands promoting “ ordinary ” women with flaws, different shades and shapes.we see a major transformation happening. That’s cool.But…..

Has it hit the normal humankind yet to normalize unique shades, diverse shapes and irregular skin tones and body hair? Not yet and Not happening anytime soon.

Now, this totally doesn’t mean I am against making yourself look better or feel better.

But why can’t we just approve people for who they are? Why do we desire to have an opinion over anything and everything? Why do we address people like “oh that short boy or that fair-skinned girl”? Why can’t we add a deeper definition to people? Have we limited ourselves to superficiality?

I am in the practice of rehabilitating myself from this fundamental chaos that has impacted me. Healing is a never-ending journey.Body shaming gives people terrible anxiety, feeling of unworthiness and withdrawal.

Our genes were not handpicked by us.We absolutely had no control over this . We came out of THE UNIVERSE’s creation.

Are You judgemental of this magnificent universe’s creation itself ? woaaahhh! You are a speck of dust to be judging ITS CREATIONS sweetheart.

I tell this to myself when I find my meddlesome brain starts its judgement. It has been a checkpoint to stop and reframe thoughts.

A thought is merely a thought and it doesn’t define you but your actions interpret you.

1.To become aware of it.

2. Tell yourself it isn’t real- nobody who used “ fair and lovely” got employment instantly or those who used “ close up ” toothpaste ended up smooching the same day with a fresh breath.

Even the happiest of individual online has depressions and even the pro who has met the glamour standards has insecurities.

3.Jealousy, enviousness and comparisons are a part of human emotion that needs to be accepted. The more you negotiate with it, the louder it becomes

Accept it.Make peace with it.

Those emotions are your friends in disguise and they have come over to teach you some unhealed parts of yourself.

They will be stopping by frequently until you understand your lesson. Even if you acquire your lesson, it is bound to return periodically. observe all the stories your brain creates . They are solely tales and make peace with misleading statements.

Start practising a bit of authenticity so you don’t set mythical standards for someone furthermore.

4.Donot let anyone point out “ flaws”.

Speak back to that aunty Ji or that so-called analyst.

Don’t body shame them back but precisely let them know that you are satisfied the way you are and they can walk-off if they can’t live next to your shortcomings or If your flaws are bothersome.Use your voice.It makes you feel good .

Be kind to yourself in this whole process.

5.You are wonderful and you are more than enough even if you don’t realise it.

6.your words can impact others in many ways that you don’t realise.

don’t go to a child or newborn and ask or discuss their skin tones .

7. Disguising body shame as a “ joke” is not okay.

“ Don’t compare your effortlessly living, breathing and beautiful soul with someone’s filtered, plotted, recreated and sweated online body .”

You are a sexy beast! Believe.