How I Got Laid Off: What Happened?
By: Riiz King
Tags: Life Experience, Help, Life Lessons, Change, Honesty

When is enough, enough?

Photo by Thomas Lefebvre

It has been 14 weeks since being laid off from work, even so, I sit searching. Over the course of three months, I have filled out and submitted 300 plus job applications. I have called and sent emails to jobs checking the status of my applications. Some jobs respond with good news while others told me I was not a good fit. The ones that responded with good news was missing benefits or paying poorly but asked you to complete an extensive list of duties.

At first, when Covid struck elation filled my entire body because my dreams had materialized. I could work from home. I felt like it was the universe answering my years of wishes. I did a decent job at the place that employed me. I was not the best, but I got the job done. I learned quick though, that working from home was too comfortable. I would get pulled away by children, games, writing, thoughts, and daily processes of life. I enjoyed working from home. It was very flexible but difficult.

It was weird. I would have team meetings and my supervisor would never have a clue what was going to happen with the department and how things would pane out. A lot of questions asked went without definite answers because everyone was uncertain on what was going to happen next. All there was every day was lingering possibilities and uncertainties. This additional information prepared me mentally for the “PHONE CALL.”

The day and time were unexpected, but the moment was not. I remember receiving a phone in August from my supervisor. She was empathic in telling me I was being let go because of budget cuts. She mentioned that if there was anything that she could do to help reach out. I kindly said thank you for the experience letting her know that all will be well. I offered this same message to any colleagues that apologized for the situation asking me what I would do next.

During this time, I was beginning my Practicum which I was excited about. I figure this would keep me busy until I regain traction in the working world. All was going well. There were some miscommunications on my part that eventually got clarified. The Marliyn Center was the agency I was interning with. They were a special group of strong Afro-American Women with a wealth of knowledge routed in mental health, substance abuse and many other areas. If they would have me again, I would definitely go back to learn more form them because what they offer, I could use to help people improve themselves.

Unfortunately, with all that I faced left me heavy because I needed money to support and take of my family. The pressure increased anxiety. I knew that I needed help but incapable of reaching out to the agency for it. I did not have insurance to cover the cost. I did what I normally do which was write. I could reintroduce my poetry book “Love Felt” and produce a new one called “Unforgettable Sights.”

As I was saying, anxiety had me hearing eyes judge me and seeing words paint me unlike the image in my soul.

This led me to question myself. What I was doing which resulted in me withdrawing from my practicum. Ultimately, pushing my graduation date back another year. I accumulated more debt in loans, owed the school money and I am expecting a little girl on top of two boys and wife to feed with bills to pay. All I keep asking myself is what is next?

The wisdom in this search for a job is a experinece where you find yourself or someone else.