Why It Doesn’t Work if You Try to Love People
By: Kembang Langit
Tags: Self Improvement, Family, Love, Consciousness, Self Help

How to Love The Jellyfish

We will not be able to love the jellyfish unless we try to understand them first. Learning about them, how they feel, and finding out their best interest. Don’t rush into a conclusion or an action. Take as long as you need to observe them. Attune your energy and feelings to them. Go into their zone. Ask them questions so they will feel our pure intention.

People are rushing into some things to do. They want to prove the love and quickly show the love to the others. As if they are afraid that the other will not feel loved and drifted away.

What is Love anyway?

Love is to take other’s best interest as a part of ourselves — Teal Swan.

Can we accept their painful feelings? Can we understand them completely? Are we invalidating their emotions? Can we truly see their soul?

The Universal Human Desires

Through these years, I found that the deepest desire of every soul on this planet earth is the same, which is….

❤ We want to be loved….

❤ We want to be seen….

❤ We want to be heard….

For who it is we truly are, for our original self. I can not tell you how much I am longing for this feeling most of the time. I am craving love, and I can not undo this feeling. It is always in the background of my mind. Why is that? Because Love is our birthright.

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio from Pexels

Do it From Love, Not for Love

We think that if we love people, then people will love us back. We mustered all of our energy to love because we are unconsciously desperate for it.

When we “try” to love people, we are not coming from the right source. I have a good example. Yeah, you right — it is my childhood story.

My parents think that they already love me, but I did not feel loved at all. It is like we live in a completely different world; there is a huge thick invisible wall that can never be crossed. They don’t know how to understand me because it brings many uncomfortable emotions that they don’t want to feel.

This is really a massive global dysfunctional issue in relationships. We are separated. We are fragmented. We can’t feel love.

We love from the wrong place, and to make it even worst, we try hard to love.

Love is the recognition of oneness in a world of duality — Eckhart Tolle

Understanding is the other name of love. How can you love if you don’t know their best interest? It is impossible.

Three Steps to Be More Understanding

Find your center first.

To be at the capacity to love, first and foremost, you must recognize the root of love inside you. By taking a deep mindful, and conscious breath a couple of times, we will feel the love that is always hidden beneath our emotions.

This will take practice, just like a skill. Most people are unaware of this part. The “I love you” means nothing if you don't feel it in yourself first. So, take your time to really soak in your own love unabashedly.

2. Give your Uninterrupted Presence

Have you ever feel like something is not quite right when connecting with others? For example, when we are in the middle of a story, the other suddenly interrupts their takeaways or opinions.

We can feel that they are not really listening; they listen to reply. And then we lose all the momentum to continue our story. I have been on both sides, and it sucks.

Most people don’t need advice. People sometimes too quick to give unsolicited advice. We need a presence of love. An acceptance of our feelings. That's it! People already have the answer inside them. We can only hold the space to support them in finding their own answer that already lies within.

Uninterrupted presence means looking deeply into their eyes with full attention, letting them empty their hearts, and not interrupting until they’re finished.

3. Love happens naturally as a by-product

When they felt seen, heard, and understood, love will come naturally. Slowly but sure. It is almost spontaneously. You don’t even have to think about love. It is already happening. You feel warm, light, and vulnerable.

By understanding people, we open a new path to unity and oneness. We will create a whole new world just by having a conscious awareness. This is how we can change the world.