Oh look, a kitten.
Tags: Adhd, Neurodiversity, Introduction, Careers, Blonde

Hi, my name is Fish and I have ADHD.

For decades I thought when I wrote the beginning of that sentence, it would be, “Hi. my name is Fish and I’m an: a) alcoholic, b) rape victim, c)over-weight quirky person, 4)blonde, 5) person with scar after mugging”.

But the facts are, my name is Fish and I have ADHD. I also have 3 incredible children and a ridiculously patient husband. The small people don’t know it, but they have incredible IQs, compassion, a slightly higher than ordinary sense of justice for their fellow man (which is not at all an issue for their demographic background) and their dad’s sporting ability and social skills and some atopic allergies.

As a person with ADHD, I never tried to mask. I always thought, I was just a little bit faster than everyone else, that my brain was different, but not that different and other people didn’t understand. Well mostly. I thought people should understand me… and when I was young and blonde and then having babies they did. But, I did the “career” thing late… in my early 20s I earned money to travel and live and party and in my late 20s, I had babies and renovated houses with some career sprinkled in. From 35–40, I decided to career. And I was good, as long as you were comfortable in yourself and your abilities, I was the best there was.

But if you weren’t… then I was trouble, in one case, one man consistently blackballed me for jobs I was the best person for, thereby changing the course of my career, because I wasn’t “self-aware” enough, because I had the answers to the problems too early and didn’t wait for his pre-ordained conclusion. I cried so hard and so many times over the 3 jobs he sabotaged from me. Hearing from AMAZING female mentors that, “I was really good fun, but not a fit for the department”.

Another manager said, people don’t just decide this about you, they give you chances…. and I never determined, what? What did they decide about me? That I was smarter than you but less direct? Less fun to be with? Less likely to conclude meetings with the right outcome earlier? Or just a person with a brain that works differently? and.. I always knew the last question was the correct one.

You would think, that when working with me it would be difficult. But, the thing I’ve noticed a lot of people struggle with is “liking me more than they are supposed to”, they want me to work with them as I can fix their problems…but don’t want the honest review and directness that comes with that.

So you see… my career is at an impasse.

I’m good, I’m very, very good, I have answers and strategies and approaches to problem solutions and I am rarely if ever wrong. If you are comfortable with other people being smarter than you and in what you do, I’m amazing… mostly. If you are a person who worked your way through school, uni/work wit diligence and books and enough IQ but not that extra flare. I AM YOUR WORST NIGHTMARE.

I am smart, I am insightful, I am right…. and I am all those things whilst knowing everyone’s kids names, schools, pets, birthdays and… OH LOOK A KITTEN.

I’m the best and quirkiest accountant you’ve ever met. I know much more about Excel than you do. I’m cute and blonde and fluffy.

My name is Fish, and I have ADHD.