The Prostitute, The Housemaid, and the Little Brown Monkey; Common Titles For A Southeast Asian Woman
By: Jasmin El-I
Tags: Racism, Women, Racial Profiling, Sexism, Mysogyny

“So, how much?” “Excuse me?” “How much do you charge? You’re from these parts. Don’t tell me you’re not a prozzie.”

That’s a conversation that occurred, sadly, not only once or twice in my lifetime. I vividly remember this incident in Saigon when I was backpacking around Southeast Asia in 2010. I was waiting for a friend to pick me up outside a small mom and pop shop.

While reading a book and drinking coffee, a guy, looking like a fellow tourist at the other table, waved and smiled. I nodded my head in acknowledgment and smiled back. He then came over and asked if he could join. He seemed friendly and harmless, so I saw no reason why he couldn’t.

He said he’s from Australia and had been traveling for months all over Southeast Asia. He had many stories, and I was quite happy to listen and ask for more information about the places he’d visited. His only question for me was where I was from, and upon hearing my response, his demeanor unexpectedly changed from pleasant to less favorable.

He had assumed I was from the US. The friend I was waiting for then called saying he was arriving in a few minutes. As I was about to get ready to leave, the Aussie dude hastily asked, “so, how much?”

The response I remember was, “what?”I honestly had no idea to what he was referring. He then said, “well, you’re from around here, don’t tell me you’re not a prostitute. You smiled at me. You were flirting with me. You’re a prozzie. How much do you charge?”

Most people tend to associate your clothing and accessories with what you do for a living. It’s mean to categorize people based on what they’re wearing, but one of life’s harsh realities is that we’re cruel, shallow, and judgemental beings.

However, given the fact that most of the time I wear a regular fit t-shirt, jeans, and boots or flip-flops, it’s mind-boggling that someone would think I was a sex worker. At that time, I remember I was wearing baggy jeans that were old and dirty, flip-flops, an oversized black t-shirt that had a picture of an orange monster, and a black baseball cap.

I seldom make myself pretty and rarely wear jewelry or makeup. I definitely didn’t have any of those on that particular morning. As portrayed in movies, there was no suggestive tapping the knee, seductive twirling of hair, droopy eyelids, or licking the lips involved. I don’t think I gave him any reason to think I wanted his money in exchange for sex.

However, as the dummy said, I come from Southeast Asia, how can’t I be a prostitute?

Being polite and decent were synonymous with flirting. The fact that I’m Southeast Asian makes me a lady of the evening regardless of my appearance, time of day, how I was speaking, and topics I prefer to discuss. Often in the past, if not labeled a lady of the night, a sugar baby, or a mail ordered bride; I was a housemaid or a nanny just because I’m from that region.

“You’re a Southeast Asian Woman; you’re a prostitute or a housemaid.”

I’ve heard these words multiple times. Men and women from different parts of the world have worded these assertions differently, but they all conveyed the same thoughts. To them, a Southeast Asian woman is either a sex worker or a housekeeper.

“So, you live in Thailand. Do you work in Pattaya?”( malicious smirk)

“Oh, I enjoyed my time in Olongapo and Angeles City. You women from there are fun and beautiful.”(wink, wink)

“Good morning Vietnam! Me love you long time.”

“Are you traveling with your ‘daddy’?”

“You’re traveling by yourself? How can you afford that?”

“As your friend, I don’t think you should be hanging out with these women( the speaker was referring to my female friends and me). Maybe with a Japanese girl or a Singaporean, it’s ok.”

“ How many guys do you talk to online?”

“You must have a rich, old, white boyfriend?”

“How much do your sponsors send you?”

“Are you here with your husband? Oh, you must be looking for one?”

“My friend is looking for a nanny, interested?”

“You should hang out with Linda. She’s my friend’s helper from your country.”

“Are they your employers?” (Pointing to my foreign friends)

“You just used the word INDEED?! Wow. How many English speaking boyfriends have you had?”

“You can speak English well. Your husband’s a good teacher.”