What Job Taught Me About Honest Prayer
By: Ilana Reimer
Tags: Prayer, Sincerity, Honesty, Christianity, Scripture

My worst prayer, or best prayer?

One of the most tangible answers to prayer I’ve ever received was triggered by a highly unsatisfactory, seemingly unproductive hour or so I spent lying facedown in the grass, crying and yelling at God.

I was angry and confused about certain messed up things in my past. This was the first time I dared address this shame, to ask God why, and beg Him to fix me.

Nothing happened.

There was no spiritual “aha” moment or deep assurance of love. I walked away, feeling emptier and more hurt than before.

But, a few months later, God prompted me to revisit that part of my past and write it all down in detail. He gave me the courage to share this story, first with one person and then with many.

Gradually, he took away my shame and began to heal a part of me I thought would never be healed.

All this was sparked by what felt like a very unholy, un-Christ-like moment of prayer.

Recently, I was surprised by Job’s honesty in prayer. Looking deeper, Scripture is full of interactions with God that are shockingly…human.

And by that, I mean, not always polite, kind, or saintly.

Dear God, you suck. Amen.

“For he crushes me with a tempest and multiplies my wounds without cause; he will not let me get my breath, but fills me with bitterness.”(Job 9:17–18, NIV).

Job’s prayer style isn’t what you expect to hear on a Sunday morning.

His complaints are raw and honest. He bitterly lashes out at God, calling Him unjust and accusing Him of “mocking the despair of the innocent” (Job 9:22–23, NIV). Pretty unsettling, right?

Job isn’t alone. Abraham argued with God over Sodom, pushing back as if to test the depth of the Lord’s compassion (Genesis 18:16–33).

In a more unconventional form of prayer, Jacob wrestled with the angel of God, or God Himself. After all, doesn’t prayer simply mean communicating with God?

We caricature prayer as piously kneeling at a church altar, lifting up eloquent monologues.

Instead, Jacob challenged God to a wrestling match and then asked to be blessed (Genesis 32:22–32).

Moses had one of the most remarkable relationships with God ever recorded. But when he first met the Lord, he was stubborn, stating his many fears and doubts about the mission God had for him (Exodus 3:2–4:17).

This type of interaction is presented regularly in Scripture. The speakers were not condemned for their dogged pursuit; rather, they found favour with God.

The Bible says that God spoke to Moses “face to face, as one speaks to a friend” (Exodus 33:11–17, NIV).

Jesus’ weird prayer parables

But are these brutally honest prayers really un-Christ-like?

Jesus describes praying using a parable of a persistent widow. She comes before a stubborn judge time after time, asking for justice. Eventually, the judge gives her what she wants because he’s tired of her constant requests and is even afraid she might attack him if she doesn’t get her way (Luke 18:1–8).

Previously, I had taken this story to simply be telling us to ask regularly for something if we really wanted it. But the example is of a woman who argued her case so regularly, and forcefully the judge thought she might actually commit violence if he didn’t give her what she wanted.

And this is how Jesus talks about prayer?!

In the next parable, he goes on to praise the straight-forward, humble honesty of the tax collector who simply prayed, “God, have mercy on me, a sinner,” (Luke 18:9–14).

Jesus seems to be telling us:

Be tenacious and put up a fight for what you want. Be honest with God.

Don’t worry about how you look and don’t be fake. I want you, not the person you think I want.

God likes straight shooters

As I was pondering the kind of prayer God seems to desire, the phrase “straight shooter” came to mind. Out of curiosity, I double-checked the definition of a straight shooter.

“Straight shooter: a thoroughly upright straightforward person.” — Merriam-Webster.

If you search straight shooter in thesaurus.com, two of the synonyms that come up are “good person,” and “salt of the earth.”

Of course, this isn’t particularly ground-breaking. Honesty is a familiar Judeo-Christian value. However, not many Christians I know are truly straight shooters.

More often, we dodge pointed questions or shy away from asking them because things could get awkward.

We do the same thing with God.

We pray vague, safe prayers because we’re unsure that God will answer bigger, scarier requests. We’re afraid of doubt or disappointment.

Job’s angry, fearful babble would likely be met with uncomfortable silences in many Christian circles in North America.

Now, I’m not saying the takeaway here is to wail on street corners or to become attention-seeking, inconsiderate, or arrogant in the name of honesty.

Being a straight shooter does not necessarily mean you have to say what you think all the time.

But I do think God asks his followers to be bluntly themselves — even if that self isn’t always pretty.

He wants us to come before Him with our mixed bags of emotions and opinions, not stuff our true selves in the closet and pretend we’re fine. He wants us to be reliable sources of truth for our friends, who know we’ll always be honest with them.

Being open and straightforward requires wisdom-seeking, integrity, and humility. And while God is kind, putting up with our yelling, accusing, crying, and complaining, I don’t think this is always the best way to pray.

Yet if we bring our shouts and tears to God, he will walk us through those times until we reached the other side.

Job’s story is not the warm and fuzzy relationship with the Lord we want to hear about.

But the thing is, he chose to confront God, not run away and channel his bitterness elsewhere. He didn’t try to find happiness without God. He stuck it out, and the Lord did show up (Job 42:5).

Full disclosure: as I am writing this, I keep thinking of those who have felt as though God is absent, despite years of crying out to Him.

I know that talking to God can’t be summarized in a pat dismissal of “seek and you shall find.” But I have seen in my own life, the lives of others, and in Scripture, that there is much to be gained from the choice to be a straight-shooter in all areas of life — prayer most of all.