This 6-Minute Method Will Help You Deal With Difficult Emotions
By: Leo Zeballos
Tags: Mental Health, Self Improvement, Life, Life Lessons, Self

How to manage difficult emotions

I think I’ve gotten better at managing my emotions by implementing some healthy habits in my life.

But there are times when I’m in a certain situation that triggers some difficult emotions that overwhelm me completely.

I deal with them by doing a simple 6-minute exercise that helps me cope with them and feel calmer afterward.

A big problem is that we often ignore the difficult emotions or bottle them up because we are afraid to face them. That will just worsen the problem and it will make you feel irritated even at the smallest things.

The exercise I’m about to teach you helps you deal with these difficult emotions by facing them and accepting them. It works because it forces you to pay attention to anything but your emotions and the only way to get through them, it’s right through the middle.

It’s an 8-step exercise

1. Sit with the feeling

Sit down in a chair or lay down in bed. Close your eyes, that way you can’t escape your emotions

2. Put names to the feeling

By naming your emotions, you reduce their impact on you. So try to identify the exact words of what you’re feeling.

Usually, powerful emotions are a mixture of multiple ones, so give several names. For example, hurt, pessimistic, discouraged, rejected.

3. Remind yourself that it’s just a feeling

Don’t give it too much power, yet try to listen to its message.

What is this feeling trying to tell me?

Why am I feeling this way?

Was it triggered by a recent event or a past experience?

Take some time to reflect on the message of your feeling

4. Let your tears out

Don’t hold back.

Now is time to let everything out and by no means diminish the importance of your emotions. There is a reason or several reasons why you are feeling that way and they are all valid.

5. Recognize that no feeling lasts forever

Accept your feelings and accept that whatever you are feeling doesn’t determine who you are.

For me, this was a very important realization because when you recognize that you are not your emotions, it’s power over you decreases.

6. Picture the feelings as a wave

This is the step I like the most. What you need to do is imagine water waves washing over you.

I visualize myself standing still while waves come from every direction and wash over me.

It’s like these water waves are your emotions and they try to hit you hard. The stronger the emotion, the harder the water waves will hit you.

And all you need to do is stay still, don’t do anything to stop the waves from hitting you.

I like this step because it helps me remember that my emotions are not me and they are just trying to provoke me to react aggressively.

7. Use your breathing to help you

While the water waves are still washing over you, focus on your breathing.

Every time you inhale, you are breathing in strength to fight this difficult emotion. Your ability to tolerate it gets stronger and stronger.

Repeat it over and over.

8. Put it aside and distract yourself from it

You’ve sat with the emotion. Once you feel it lessening, you can finish the exercise and distract yourself from it.

You’ll notice it’s easier to distract yourself from it than before you did the exercise.