9 Things Us Black Girls Wish You Understood About Our Hair
By: Peace Aisogun
Tags: Listicles, Lists, 20 Somethings, Awareness, Black Hair

1. Extensions don’t mean that I don’t love my natural hair or myself. The first time that I was faced with this perspective was in Missouri when a girl asked me if I did not like myself since she rarely got to see my “real” hair. I will admit, I was caught off guard. Trying new looks is not synonymous with not loving my natural look. It is all a matter of preference, and sometimes it’s a matter of protective hairstyles.

2. If my hair goes from shoulder-length to back-length, it could be extensions or shrinkage. Hair grows as it grows. It doesn’t grow at will. But sometimes I just want to try a new look so I get extensions. It always baffled me growing up how many people couldn’t understand that my extensions did not grow from my head and that they could be removed with no damage done to my scalp or my hair. With that said, extensions are not the only way length is achieved. Keep in mind that hair texture determines shrinkage. There are various hair types that exist across the board no matter your race. Depending on how tightly your hair curls, you may or may not experience shrinkage at different rates. There is a long of diversity in shrinkage. Different rules apply.

3. Protective hairstyles are important and aren’t always extensions. Chances are if you didn’t grow up around protective hairstyles, this term can be puzzling. All it means is that there are certain hairstyles that can protect hair from breakage. Believe it or not, the tighter the curl pattern, the more fragile the ends of the hair can be. Protective hairstyles help to conceal the ends of the hair protecting them from damage caused by combing it often, a change in weather, and more. It can also make it easier to manage and makes getting ready super quick and easy.

4. I can have natural hair and wear protective hairstyles. I remember telling someone that I had natural hair while my hair was in box braids and she said, “Wait, no…you just told me that those were extensions”. We laughed about it and I explained that all “natural” means is that there have been no chemicals added to transform the natural curl pattern. So I can have my hair in as many protective hairstyles as I want, or blow-dry it from time to time, as long as it returns to its natural state when water touches it, it is natural.

5. Chemically treated hair also grows from the head naturally but its natural texture has been altered. When someone texturizes (adds chemicals to loosen their natural curl pattern) their hair or relaxes (adds chemicals to permanently straighten their hair) their hair, it alters their natural curl pattern entirely. That’s a big difference.

6. I do not have to wash my hair as often. A friend once asked when was the last time I washed my hair and I said it had been about three or four days and she looked at me wide-eyed and astonished. But then I explained that my hair doesn’t produce oils as quickly as hers do and so I do not have to wash it as frequently. In fact, over-washing my hair could easily lead to me losing all my hair.

7. Oils and moisturizers are actually great/essential for my hair. While some of my friends are loading up on dry shampoo, I am stocking up on oils and moisturizers for my hair because we have different needs. My hair grows best and remains healthiest when moisturized, but remember too much of any good thing can be a bad thing. Moisturizing my hair once or twice a day works great for me.

8. Braids, Crochet, Twists, Dreads, and Weaves are not the same thing. The amount of times that people have said that they love/miss my “dreads” when referring to my braids or twists has proven to be quite annoying. They are visually quite different. Also, Google provides a lot of free information on all of their unique differences, but sometimes people seem more interested in making black women explain and defend their hair choices. It gets tiring.

9. Do not touch it. While I acknowledge that I understand wanting to touch hair that may seem fascinating, it is important to consider (1) why you want to touch the hair (2) how that makes me feel. Please consider my feelings and your motivation as you keep your hands to yourself.