Saying “I Love You” With No Words
By: Leona Brits
Tags: Relationships, Marriage, Love, Family, Life

No relationship is perfect, and mine certainly wasn’t. We had our ups and downs, we had stupid arguments and fights.

At one point — when I embraced my self-knowledge path — our personal paths and beliefs seemed to had gone into different directions; I went through some questionings. But I got answers, and they never took me away from him. I dare to say that all happy couples sometimes question their life choices and their relationship.

In general, I had a marvellous relationship, and I regret nothing, much the opposite: I am thankful for each day we spent together.

My partner was my best friend, he knew all about me, to my tiny faults and weirdnesses. And he accepted me, he wanted me in his life, exactly like I was.

He truly loved me, and I am immensely grateful for having felt that, for having lived the most wonderful sensation existent.

The curious thing is that it was rare for him to say it, to verbalize “I Love You”. He wasn’t a big talker when regarding emotions. We could talk for hours about any matter, but conversations about feelings he could live without it.

But there wasn’t a single day in our thirteen years together that I had a drop of doubt of his love for me. Because he showed me: day after day, for all of our thirteen years together.

As he once told me: “You are under my skin.”

This was my partner’s way to say ‘I Love You’

Photo by Nguyễn Tân on Unsplash

He heard me, even when I said nothing

My partner was the only person that truly knew what was going on in my mind without me saying a word.

I have ‘one of those faces’, one that expresses more than I often wish. But if I control it, I can hide everything. Except with him — he always knew everything. Either from a micro-expression, from the vein on my forehead, or for my breathing: he always knew exactly how I felt.

I don’t lie, but if I wanted to, with him would be impossible.

He acted on my emotions

Reading my body language, he would respond accordingly.

So many times I opened the door of our flat, and only by looking at me, he opened his arms. I’d hide my face inside his hug, tuned my heartbeat with his and merge with him.

He was my person, my safety port. My everything.

Wake up during the night to cover me

I suffer from chronic pain due to rheumatic disease. Years ago, when my pain was out of control, the nights were a real hell. Trying to find a better position to sleep, I’d often push the duvet away, and I couldn’t pull it back because of the pain.

My partner got used to getting up several times at night to cover me. I didn’t want it, he deserved his rest, but every night he got up, walked to my side of the bed and tuck the duvet under the mattress. If he felt me awake, I had a bonus of a kiss in the forehead.

Random texts during the day

I always smiled several times a day because of him. He used to send me texts, sometimes with an I love you, but mostly just a “checking on me” text.

He’d ask how my day was going or if I was in pain. He’d send me a kiss or an I’m thinking about you.

He also used to send me emails with funny videos (his “funny” concept might be different from yours, as he had dark humour and we match our sarcasm). We used to laugh so much together.

He had an interest in my life

Every single day, especially during dinner, he asked me about my day. He knew the name of my colleagues and my students, and he asked specific questions about them.

When I was taking my master degree, he asked about some subjects. If I needed it, he helped me to study.

He always held my hand

No need to extrapolate on this one.