My Fertility Problem Went Un-Diagnosed for Years Because of How I Look
By: Sadie Lee
Tags: Pcos Symptoms, Fertility, Health, Pcos Awareness, Pcos

My Fertility Problem Went Un-Diagnosed for Years Because of How I Look

Doctors overlooked my health problem for years

Doctors: “When was your last period?”

Me: “Three Months Ago”

This was my answer to the question they ask you every time in the doctor's office.

Part of me wants to know why they even ask when the last time my period was, if they don’t act on abnormal or normal answers…

Honestly, it would be like them asking “When was the last time you peed?” And me responding “6 Days Ago” and the doctor would just be nodding along to that answer.

I assume they asked about my period because they wanted to know if everything was normal. But me answering that I got my period every three months never raised any eyebrows?

Whenever I brought up my irregular periods I would hear:

“You’re thin.”

“You’re young.”

“You’re a runner.”

Doctors and nurses alike would shrug off my lack of a period. Meanwhile, I would spend hours scouring the internet, and constantly convince myself that my missed period was probably because I was stressed or constantly pregnant? I really didn’t know. But none of my doctors seemed concerned.

I have OCD and it's particularly centered around health obsessions, this was one of those few times I was actually glad I had OCD. Sometimes I get on an anxiety kick and I can't stop. One particular night I had been up researching all the causes of a missed or late or irregular period. I finally just decided that I was going to go into the doctor’s office and just demand they help me look into my irregular periods. I had WebMded everything I could. So I made an appointment and marched in:

“I want a pregnancy test, endometriosis test, thyroid tests, I want everything. I want to know why my periods are so irregular.”

My doctor just nodded along and ordered me all the tests. I wasn’t coming off as anxious, I was coming off as rational. Somehow that made me even angrier. Why did I have to order this slew of tests in my mid-twenties? Why hadn’t I had a doctor help me with this?

I was growing convinced there was a “face” to PCOS and a growing concern that this is what had delayed my diagnosis. I was thin, with little acne, my hair was fine(although I swear my hairline is thining, my boyfriend thinks I’m crazy). Everything that was supposed to be a symptom wasn’t really obvious. Looking back at it, I did have some pimples around my butt, chin, and back. But every twenty-something had the occasional zit. I was actually 7lbs away from being underweight so that didn’t apply to me either. Additionally, every once in a while I did get my period every month.

So I didn’t really make the face of PCOS. If you Google the condition you will see “dark and unruly body hair” and “baldness” and “overweight” and “missed periods.” I really only fit one of the boxes in my mind. Every time I tried to Google why I had a delayed period, I never found a consistent result.

To this day, I still don’t really trust doctors. Why did I need to get a yearly physical and a pap smear, to hear that everything seemed fine?

My best friend is constantly told she probably has PCOS whenever people look at her. Just based on her appearance people just assume she has the disorder. I met with multiple doctors and gynecologists for years and they never mentioned anything.

PCOS can really only be diagnosed by looking at hormone levels and an ultrasound of your uterus, so why did all these doctors rule out PCOS? And why didn’t anyone suggest I go on birth control to avoid future cycsts? The whole experience has left me skeptical of our medical system. I am also hyper-aware of how often oversight and prejudice occur. Especially for women.

The whole experience taught me that illness often has a “face” or an assumed victim appearance. I knew mental illness could be invisible. But I didn’t realize that fertility could be too. I learned that I needed to advocate for myself. I learned that doctors are not going to know everything, nor are they always proactive. It’s a lesson I want to pass along, just as I wish someone had shared it with me.