Dear Skinny Jeans: I’ve Outgrown you…
By: Leah Hunt
Tags: Letting Go, Personal Development, Body Positive, Personal Growth, Body Image

My actual closet — Yes this is POST purge & to be fair shoes never stop fitting

Every year I purge — In an age of Marie Kondo and a focus on reducing consumption, it is the done thing.

And each year it gets easier. I have, over the years, heeded my husband’s input that “just because it’s a good deal, doesn’t mean you should buy it…” and so I am more selective. I look for quality, not fast fashion. I read labels and fabric composition. I select classic silhouettes and timeless colours.

But I’m not perfect.

There are outdoor parties and BBQs that justify a new summer dress. There are speaking engagements and panel discussions that merit a new suit. Or new shoes at least. Pro tip: shoes are what those who will notice are most likely to remember when you are on stage. There are theme events and times of year that let me rationalize a seasonal shirt or scarf or accessory.

And while the piles have, over the years, gotten smaller overall, it is still a necessary, annual task.

So I make the piles. And I am ruthless.

Or so I thought.

The truth is there are beautiful things, expensive quality pieces that somehow make the cut each year. And they shouldn’t

There are a pair of Tommy Bahama trousers in that beautiful light-weight fabric that is perfect for summer business. They are olive with a high fitted waist and wide legs. The pleat on the front is sharp as a knife and they never wrinkle.

Ever.

I can pair them with everything from a bold-print, tailored button-up shirt to a classic white t-shirt. I can wear them with sandals or my favourite — and most comfortable — high heels. And when I wear them I feel like I am 6 feet tall.

So when I do that Marie Kondo test, when I pick them up and examine them — still in their perfect state — no pulled seams or imperfections — and ask that critical question “Do these bring me joy?” that answer is YES!

Wanna know the last time I felt joy wearing them?

2010.

A lot has happened since then. There was another baby. And then there was a dress code change that mean jeans were more appropriate than my wardrobe of tailored suits and trousers.

And even when the opportunity did present to don these fabulous trousers, the season was wrong or there was a better option in my closet or I was too post-holidays/post-baby/post-whatever to actually be able to zip them up and breathe.

And then life continued to unfold — time away from work and then flexible work options where yoga pants were more practical and a hell of a lot more comfortable to wear in my home office.

In the nine-years since 2010 my body — like me — is different.

So the pants just don’t fit. And they likely never will again.

And ten or five or even two years ago, this would have felt like defeat. Like a failure to ‘get back’ to my previous or ideal body shape. To fit back into ‘those pants’.

I wonder now, even if those pants fit, could they handle me?

My body — like me — is different in many amazing, powerful and beautiful ways.

It is craftier and more experienced. There are lines around my eyes from laughing and my mouth from mourning. My body is both slower and stronger. I listen better and labor longer to find the forgiveness and compassion I didn’t bother with before. I touch people when I speak to them. I make eye contact when I listen. I hug harder and hang on longer.

I am bigger and rounder and fuller and wiser — inside and out.

So this year, I said good bye to those trousers along with a lot of other clothing.

Not because those items are too small. Not because I am too big.

Because I am more.

More mature, more developed, more savvy, more ambitious and more grounded.

And those trousers? They can’t handle all that more — My body and I have simply outgrown them.