“A friend may be waiting behind a stranger’s face” -Maya Angelou
Tags: Introspection, Birthday, Friendship

Photo by Ilyuza Mingazova on Unsplash

I woke up to severe foot pain on my 34th birthday. As I could barely take a step, I went to urgent care for help. Waiting for the doctor after an x-ray blessed me with some precious “me time” when I flipped through the photos from last year on my phone. I could see the seasons changing, a big lot of nature, screenshots of interesting life quotes from the social media but above all, my frumpy selfies with a downright smile in each one of them. This got me into introspection and some recollections from the last year.

When the COVID lockdown started in early 2020, I felt secured and happy to have my family around at home. In a few months, the experience became exhausting and brain-draining. A friend and I who were in the same boat started weekend hikes to take a break from routines and family. In no time, the morning walks began to stretch out until noon and eventually past sunset. We would still return home with umpteen topics left to discuss.

Once, this friend told me, “You always interact with an impermeable glass around, encaging yourself.Why do you need that?”

That was an eye-opener to me about myself. I pondered over it day and night and still do. I became skeptical about my interpersonal skills, tried out several justifications for situations but finally convinced that it was true. I have always interacted with people setting a boundary. There have been very few people who have crossed that boundary and seen me closer. But no one has ever told me this.

The fair and upfront comment started loosening me up day by day. I started sharing my thoughts, nostalgic memories, everyday life situations, and almost everything with this friend without any restrictions. This constant exchange of ideas, perceptions and actions gradually made me realize that my attitudes and views have been altering ever since. I started to think and speak out loud from my heart, unlike before when the shield around me would filter my thoughts and transform them into a socially acceptable format. I contemplated several life situations where things happened in a way that was approved by everyone around me but not my heart. It is not a state of wisdom to understand that “You wouldn’t be heard unless spoken” but it is practically not always the easiest to do. This revelation enabled me to travel down the lane, build on my memories, show me what my interests were and what my heart really says. Above all, big confidence to implement them step by step.

I recollect skipping opportunities to acquaint with this friend on purpose several years ago. That was due to my busy work and family schedules back then and multiple social groups that I was already a part of. But destiny made us meet through a common friend and from then, we have never looked back.

Sometimes people walk in as strangers and fill in your life.

As it was my Birthday, the same friend gifted me the book “Letter to my daughter” by Maya Angelou. I meditated over the chapter, ”Bob and Decca” which concludes with the line, “I learned that a friend may be waiting behind a stranger’s face”.

How coincidental!