Giving feedback isn’t rocket science
Tags: Feedback, Personal Development, Performance Reviews, Personal Growth, Conversations

Feedback must be provided with the right intention — helping the other person step up and show improvement or get better at what they’re already doing well.

Giving feedback isn’t rocket science

Feedback is a great way to propel your team towards success. Sreevatsan Aug 9·4 min read

At an organization that I once worked at, I remember having been told that my work was “garbage”. The incident left me wounded but wondering if it could have been delivered any other way. They could have told me what about my work made them feel that way.

But because that didn’t happen, I was only left with a bruised ego and absolutely nothing else. We have all been in situations where we have received feedback that had no takeaways or learnings.

Feedback can have very constructive results or it can be destructive and catastrophic.

Constructive feedback

Makes you do what you do better

Keeps you motivated

Helps you progress in your career

Helps you understand your strengths and weaknesses better

Destructive/poorly presented feedback

Makes you defensive

Makes you feel directionless

Makes you doubt yourself

Bruises your ego

Makes your work-life unproductive

Makes your personal life miserable

Makes you lose trust in the person giving feedback and damages relationships

Makes you lose trust in the brand/organization

Shuts down your self-awareness

Makes you put on a guard

Giving constructive feedback: the Hows, Whys, and Whats

Feedback must be provided with the right intention — helping the other person step up and show improvement or get better at what they’re already doing well.

Here are couple of ways in which feedback sessions can be made more meaningful:

Be prepared

Never walk into a room unprepared when you’re out to appraise someone. Make data your best friend. There’s nothing as reassuring when you know that your feedback comes from a genuine place and good intent. It is also a good idea to pre-warn the receiver about the feedback session. Allow them to come prepared for the feedback session. This will ensure that it is more productive and interactive, thereby more effective.

Know your audience

Humans are complex creatures. Every individual is different. While it may not always be possible to foresee how people react to feedback, it is important that you tailor feedback in a manner that suits different people. You could say the same thing to two different people and completely get different reactions. You need to understand their motivations and their aspirations.

Listen, perspectives matter

Once you give your feedback, invite the receiver to share their thoughts, and listen to what they have to say. It is imperative for you to know if the feedback has landed well and if they have imbibed it the truest sense. Find out how they would want to do things differently. Follow up with them later, if possible, to see how they are doing.

Provide a safe-space when giving feedback

Remember the story at the beginning? The ‘garbage’ episode? This was dished out to me out of nowhere and in front of another person from another team. I remember feeling like wanting to vanish into thin air. Where you give feedback matters. Be thoughtful about what you tell people publicly.

Take copious notes

Taking notes is important to avoid recency bias. Yes, you can go back to them before your next conversation with the person. It’s also generally a good habit to keep a record of the performance-related conversations you’ve had, so you can use them to gauge improvement or the lack of it.

Normalize critical feedback

It’s very easy to give positive feedback. Critical feedback is often not so easy to hand out. There are several reasons for this. Primarily, it’s because of the unpleasantness involved. However, critical feedback does not have to be unpleasant. Often, we underestimate other people’s appreciation for and ability to receive critical feedback.

When you find that you need to get someone in your team to improve, let them know right away. Don’t wait for the appraisal season! Be assured, they’ll appreciate it. Of course, what you say can completely wreck their day/week, but that’s definitely better than when you tell them six months down the line.