20 Not-So-Random Things I’m Grateful For
By: Victoria Ponte
Tags: Happiness, Gratitude, Stroke Recovery, Disability, Life

Alex Alvarez for Unsplash

20 Not-So-Random Things I’m Grateful For

Inspired by Kris Gage’s story “20 Random But Real Things I’m Grateful For”

I’m not going to be funny here. Or at least I’m not going to try. I have been living life with an attitude of gratitude since I survived a severe stroke when I was 35 and expecting a baby. The baby will turn 21 this April. I’m grateful we are both alive and well.

Digging deeper, I have broken my list into 2 parts:

Stroke-Related things to be grateful for:

The fact that I was right-handed and the stroke affected my left side. This meant I didn’t have to learn how to write and eat with my non-dominant hand. The fact that I am able to drive a car safely. This is critically important as I live in the suburbs and raised two children here. Again, having the use of my dominant foot eliminated the need for complicated adaptive driving equipment. The fact that I am able to enjoy sex. Enough said. The fact that I have naturally curly hair. This means I never had a need to style my hair using two hands. It’s the right-handed application of styling products, mess it up, and I’m good to go. The fact I am able to afford and use an electronic stimulator to lift my drop foot when I walk. This means I can wear a large variety of footwear unlike during the early years of my recovery when I had to wear a brace for this purpose. I could only wear shoes the brace fit in and they were all ugly. The fact that my eyesight was not affected by the stroke. I have a friend who lost her peripheral vision and depth perception so she is unable to drive. The fact that my speech was not affected by the stroke. Being able to communicate with physical, occupational and psychological therapists made all the difference in my rehabilitation. The fact that I can breathe normally. Also just the fact I am breathing at all. The fact I can think clearly. Enough said. The fact I am able to manage my own self-care. Being able to shower and get dressed by myself adds dignity to my life.

I’m grateful for sunshine, stars and clean drinking water like everyone else.

But I have also dug deeper on this personal list of ten things in random order:

Music. Because music is medicine for our souls. I’m grateful I can carry a tune and know the lyrics to an uncanny number of songs. When I came out of the coma 20 years ago and started to sing to the radio playing at the nurse’s station, my family said that was when they knew I was going to be me. My two sons. My oldest came after 11 years of marriage, three pregnancy losses and a protracted struggle with infertility. I was 6 months pregnant with my youngest when I had the stroke. He was delivered while I was still hemiplegic. They will turn 23 and 21 this April. My parents. At 56, I am blessed to have both of my parents who are still relatively well at ages 85 and 86. Horses. I started to learn to ride year one of my stroke recovery and it has been one of the best things I have ever done. It has helped me physically, emotionally and socially. I have won 19 ribbons in horse shows since 2014. My looks. I’m grateful that being unattractive did not add to my sense of insecurity and self-consciousness at being a disabled young woman. Friends who “get it”. I’m lucky to have 2 friends who had a stroke when they were 35, one of whom was also expecting a baby at the time. We met in an online support group and have spent a week together every year for the last four years. My sense of wanderlust. I always had this, but I think it was intensified when I became disabled. I was compelled to go and see as much as I could and I have. My love for healthy foods. I’m grateful that in addition to craving sweets, I also love almost every vegetable known to man. Swimming. I’m grateful I was able to figure out how to swim in the lake where my lake house is using a personal flotation device. I can jump off the dock and swim. Heaven. Movies. I’m grateful for the artists who put in the effort to create such easy, glorious entertainment.

I invite you do make your own list of 20 things you are grateful for. It is a thought-provoking exercise and it feels great.