How To Protect Your Kid’s Mind Without Being Overprotective
By: Adrienne Koziol
Tags: Parenting, Kids, Children, World, Life

How To Protect Your Kid’s Mind Without Being Overprotective

Photo by Terence Burke in Unsplash

The fear that knows no boundaries

I don’t have scientific proof, but I’m fairly certain parents share one fear. It’s consistent regardless of time, culture, politics, and religion. It might come in different forms, but I think every parent fears for the future of their children. This world is insane and always has been. Now it’s to the point where we wonder how it can get worse. And yet it does—every day.

So, of course, we worry over what kind of world they’ll grow up in. We watch them live in blissful abandon, content in their own world of destruction. Innocent, playful destruction. Our instinct is to protect their naive bubble. We want to keep their childhood carefree. But are we doing them a disservice by completely shielding them? How much do we share?

Allowing holes in the shield

Young Minds

There’s a fine line between “informing” and “scarring.” Obviously, very young children lack the reasoning and fortitude needed to understand deep and scary issues. They need to feel secure.

We have ages 23 to 3, so our youngest are exposed to big topics just by being around our older kids. They pick up on our conversations, even when we filter what we say. Every conversation is their business, mostly when we would prefer they not hear (of course, that’s when we’re extra careful).

This selective openness allows us the opportunity to give explanations and answer questions without it feeling forced. More often than not, they get bored and runoff. Sometimes the subject comes up again hours or days later.

Families that don’t have a wide age range have more control over what young kids hear, but there are still ways to “leak information .” Everyday conversations can be a great starting point.

Sometimes it’s as simple as the promises we make. Can I guarantee that nothing bad will happen? Am I positive no one will break-in, or that I’ll come home from the grocery store? No, but I can promise my kids that I will do everything in my power to prevent those things.

False security can be dangerous to younger kids. They need to know that not all humans have the same moral code and care about others or will do the “right thing” if given a chance. I don’t want my kids thinking every adult is trustworthy. They need to be on guard to protect themselves physically and mentally.



Being honest allows them to accept that no one is immune to the trauma of this world. It helps them to be more empathetic. They’ll be aware that people are suffering and can learn to look for ways to make the world better. They won’t assume everyone’s life is going well or that others are happy. Details aren’t necessary. They can know evil exists but that we don’t have to fear it.

Sometimes we have to face evil head-on, and we can’t guarantee a positive outcome. Sometimes it’s the right thing to do, and we have to shove fear aside.

Mature Minds

Even older kids can be minimally aware of what’s going on, depending on their use of technology and their friends.

We homeschool but are a techy family and have plenty of social interaction, so our older kids are aware of what’s happening in the world.

They hear a wide range of views, and I appreciate that. We discuss and think through different sides. It makes us look deeper into the issues, causing us to either solidify or alter our views.

They are better prepared to counter arguments because of this. They are taught to be slow in coming to conclusions, research trustworthy sources, think for themselves, and respect others' opinions. Of course, this doesn’t always happen, but they’re learning. We all are.

Protect kids by preparing them

Of course, there are extremes on both sides. How much information is too much? It might be impossible to find that balance. Maturity, age, and sensitivity have to be considered. The specifics will look different for every family. Just like anything else with parenting, it’s an ever-changing road with no map. We have to make educated guesses, do the best we can, and pray for a good outcome. It’s what makes parenting so difficult.

We want them knowledgeable but not terrified. Hopeful, but not delusional. A fairy tale view of life gives unrealistic expectations.

Knowledge, when properly applied, leads to wisdom. It gives kids a reason to develop a strong base, grows their roots deep, and be unmoved in the face of adversity.