To talk or not to talk, that is the question.
By: Bronwyn Tagg
Tags: Mental Health Awareness, Running, Mental Toughness, Mental Health, Running Tips

I know there is a lot about mental health whirling round in the world of Twitter, Facebook and the internet in general, but when I read that stuff, it feels impersonal to me — more like those symptom lists and warmings you get with any box of medications. So, here’s an attempt to put the human back into mental health talk, with some personal examples.

There’s a lot of strategies out there to help you move from anxiety to peace. They all say ‘do some exercise’ but that’s not really helpful for us endurance athletes. If that were the cure, we would always be 100% okay. Often the sport we love takes advantage of those little anxieties and either accelerates them or creates them in the first place. It doesn’t always have to be an uphill battle. Here’s what I do. Feel free to comment below what works best for you.

To Talk:

Recognising that is okay to not be. In relation to lockdown, we’ve never done this before! In life you experience struggles, you recognise the fact that you came through that struggle and therefore you can do the same again. We have never faced a global pandemic in our lifetimes with the same restrictions and conditions as this, so our body and mind simply cannot refer to a past experience that you got through. You have no reference point so recognise this — and realise it is okay to not feel okay. Also, despite what social media suggests, the people you look up to and your peers are not always okay. I promise you, they’re not. Speaking up is harder than it seems, but also the first step to everything being okay again. It doesn’t really matter who you talk to — it can even be your run buddy or even just writing the words in an email. For me, my mum, coach and cycle buddies get most of my emotional offloading! Writing things downalso has a positive impact. It helps you to understand your feelings and therefore gain control of them. This control in itself can help improve your mental health. Writing down your feelings can also help you recognise the triggers for your low moods, aiding future prevention or coping techniques. Personally, every time I have a rough day or training session, I write down what occurred in the last 24 hours identifying patterns of behaviour or thoughts. Next time I experience these patterns, I know what might come and I can change the direction to something more positive. You’ll realise you’re not alone. When you feel low it’s easier to notice when other people are happy, but what you won’t see is the people that also feel low. That is why speaking about it can make you andsomeone else feel less alone — helping to heal 2 people at the same time. Professor Bobby Duffy from King’s College London suggests younger people have found the global pandemic harder than the elderly. 40% of young adults, as well as those with financial constraints are finding lockdown difficult. So that’s a significant number of people who can relate to you. Talk to them. Check on your friends — sometimes people need to be asked if they are okay to realise they are not. Social media is a gift and a curse. Sometimes an individual will go from posting on social media to not posting at all. Notice what isn’t there as well as what is and check on that friend. Just because someone dealt with the beginning of lockdown / the month / the week / yesterday, doesn’t mean they are now. People change. Just because you see someone as successful and a strong individual (mentally and physically) it doesn’t mean they are okay all the time — it means this is what they allow you to see. Don’t make assumptions! One triathlete I spoke to put it perfectly — “I’ve found I’ve had huge peaks and troughs… some weeks I’m loving it, some weeks I’m and actual potato”. Recognise these fluctuations and roll with them to an extent, but don’t let them take control. Anxiety and stress are real. Accept them and find your way of dealing with them says Dr George Hu. Try lots of different things. Sometimes this means cutting down your training. Focus on all the little ‘pots’ in your life — health, training, family, relationships, social, works etc.

Talking is one step closer to being okay and one step closer to the top of the hill (or sand dune in my case!)

Not to talk (or to listen):

Please note: I am not condoning NOT TALKING if you feel anxious! My meaning is to not continuously talk about the things that make you anxious if they are not present. Instead, talk about all the things that are present and making you feel okay. I have a little gratitude journal which helps reduce the negative stacking (the building up of negative and harmful thoughts) and turning it into reverse stacking (thinking about what is good, present, what you are grateful for and what you can achieve), improving my mental state.

If you constantly hear that you shouldn’t be okay because of a change, or that you should be scared, or should be struggling, you will start to become just that. Often talking about anxiety and stress can make you feel like you should be anxious or stressed. There is a lot floating about in the media recently about this in many social situations, such as telling children they should be worried about the grading of exams, businesses should be worried about the change in financials, and the same applies to our anxiety levels. Equally, don’t be telling other people what they should or shouldn’t be doing — that 2 hour bike ride once a week might be the only bit of control an individual has in their life. One Iron- lady I spoke to shared that she stopped using some social media; “anything with too much chatter about what people should or shouldn’t be doing was binned”. Listen to what makes sense and resonates with you. Choose who’s opinions you put value into.

Remember: it’s okay to be okay too! If you’re dealing with something well when people are around you are not, it doesn’t mean you’re not taking the situation seriously, but you have taken a different approach to reacting to that situation.

Habits, goals and achievement

Athletes will be very familiar with goals and habits in terms of their sport, but they are not always applied to their mental health. You may experience a “decreased frustration tolerance” — because there are less opportunities to have control (e.g. with the Covid restrictions in place) it can lead to smaller things making you feel frustrated. This is partly why creating (possibly new!) habits is so important. With races cancelled and dates moved, it is hard to make goals. Without those goals it can be difficult to feel that sense of achievement and training and nutritional habits can seem pointless. So, here’s some things to try.

Create some new habits. Start your day in a different way. My new morning routine starts with a cup of tea, breathing exercises and thinking about what I am grateful for. Following this, I do some visualisation of where I want to be in the next 3 months or 12 months, despite all these current pressures and changes. This really helps me focus on what is going right rather than what could be better. One awesome cyclist I spoke to shared that “national hillclimb champs are probably going to be cancelled, so it is very difficult to train specifically for them”. With the goalposts moved back or cancelled altogether, this is good chance to make any changes for the better… this individual plans to take on her first triathlon next season! Don’t stress about the stats. It’s so hard to create tangible stats when you have no races to compare. Let it go (easier said than done I know!). There’s more to sport than numbers. You may have that goal of getting faster, fitter or stronger but sometimes you should train when you want and what you want. It’s okay to have a break! “All I want is to go for random rides with mates” said one cyclist, and why now! With little to no races, enjoy your sport for what it is. Your achievement is yours. It is not better or worse than someone else’s. If you found success in doing some yoga rather than run intervals, or just getting out on your bike was a success, that is great! Don’t compare what other people are doing to what you’re managing to do.

So talk, don’t talk, set goals, or just enjoy — whatever works for you because right now, everyone is in a different place, but none of us are alone.