Expected Nature of Rape
By: Tonia Abraham
Tags: Rape, Rape Culture, Nigeria

There is penance for most victims when confronted by his/her emotions prior to reporting



assault.



But this never tuned down the strangeness seated in their chest when they were violated.



Most felt dissociated with reality, a feeling of being a mere visitor in their own body.



A body that would quiver in memory of a fleeting moment that would last for eternity.



No one expects to experience 'these things’- but neither are we ultimately surprised when we



see the headlines.



Even when light is shone on the courageous, the sufferable whispers, "My own could not have



been rape because it did not play out like this" and dismisses his/her own trauma.



Statistics show that it takes more than 10 years for victims to process what happened to them.



With these years behind victims, they become reverential family members and dignitaries who



succeeded in the eyes of society.



Success accompanied by the internal turmoil plaguing beneath.



They came, they saw and they conquered, why disrupt?



Today, social media burns with rage for the wronged at heart.



Rape is the order of the day but for every "God punish this rapist" twitter comment are two



facebook comments by rape apologists invalidating a victim’s claim to justice.



The expected narrative of 'real rape' is a vagabond who violently penetrates a naive woman in a



public place. This narrative is influenced by the media portray rape as a weapon and not what it



truly an is-an expression of entitlement over another person’s body.



The reality is that even the law struggles to define what rape thus reflects a confused



understanding.



In Nigeria, a Penal code explicitly states that sexual intercourse with a man and this wife is not



rape as it is not unlawful. Even the United Kingdom does not legally recognize a woman as a



rapist.



These laws invalidate rape claims of men who have been manipulated as sexual objects against



their will and wives whose perpetrator is her husband.



In reference to allegations of foul play based on the expected nature of what rape should look



like, the oppressed victim is expected to have fought with all her might against violation.



However, the study shows that more than 60% of women who have been assaulted admitted



they experienced a temporary and involuntary paralysis during the assault.

The immobility during an assault is scientifically backed up with the flight or fright response that



comes into play during a threat.



The misunderstanding of the volatile nature of rape has led to Rape normalisation. i.e where



many believe that women enjoy being raped.



Survivors start considering sexual assault has part of life; "something every woman eventually



has to deal with, as opposed to serious crime".



A common example is the expected lewd remakes of market boys within the Yaba, Lagos,



Nigeria vicinity towards female customers as male sexual entitlement is seen to be pervasive.



Another confounding factor in recognising an assault is that these rapists aren’t merely scums



of the earth but male figures who play vital roles in society.



Perhaps the first step in providing justice to the wronged and enabling a platform for victims to



acknowledge their violation and understand the vague but vindictive nature of rape.