It’s time to talk about your mental health at work.
By: Bill Connolly
Tags: Stigma, Mental Health Awareness, Happiness, Mental Health, Psychology

I published my first book in 2013, focused on the intersection of comedy and business. The thesis was that the skills learned by comedians on stage can help all of us be better communicators, public speakers, and leaders.

At the time, many people that I trusted told me it was a silly idea for me to write a book. After all, I was 25, hadn’t had any life experience worth sharing, and didn’t know enough about the world to add any real value.

And maybe they were partially right, but I wrote the damn book anyway because I was compelled to. Like any persistent creative idea, it just took over my mind and wouldn’t let up until I acknowledged it. And even though I was young, I already noticed glaring inconsistencies between the way people think, and the way businesses are run.

There was another reason I had to write the book. A year prior, in 2012, I had a complete mental health breakdown. I had to leave work, I stopped performing comedy, and I couldn’t see or speak to my friends. Fortunately, I got the psychological help I needed, and it pulled me out of the darkness. I wouldn’t wish that experience on anyone, but in going through it I realized that it wasn’t particularly unique. In fact, many of my friends were going through it too — but they were hesitant to open up about it. I distinctly remember being in a room with four of my closest friends, and sharing that I was in therapy and on SSRI anti-depressants for my anxiety. Over the course of the day, two of the four people pulled me aside to tell me they were also undergoing treatment, but asked me not to share it with anyone.

And so, when I wrote this book, I started by sharing my reality: that my mental health informs the advice I am going to give. Again, several people close to me told me not to put that in the book, saying things like “you’re doing so well, why would you want people to think you’re not stable?”

Photo by Dustin Belt on Unsplash

When I released the book and began speaking at companies and universities on the topic, I would always lead with my mental health story, and that was, of course, intentional. It contextualizes the rest of the (however useful) guidance I am about to deliver, and it is an invitation to those listening to recognize that their experience may not be so unique — that they need not continue to hide it from others, nor hide it from their workplace.

In those sessions, no one would ever ask a question or share their own story in the public setting, but inevitably afterwards there would be a line of people to privately and discreetly share that they too had anxiety or depression and had sought out treatment or considered it.

And yet, the stigma continued to persist. One of the most nefarious parts of a mental-health disorder is that it tends to make you believe that you’re the only one going through it.

“What’s wrong with me?” — have any of you ever asked yourself this question? I certainly did. I had a good job, great friends, physical health: how could I be this selfish to be upset when people have ‘real’ problems?

But as my mentor and professor Greg Hall told me once, “people can get sick in the head just like they get sick in the body.” And, yes, you can treat both and get better.

One time, when prepping for a speaking engagement at a large technology company, the team saw my presentation and asked me to remove the first section about my mental health crisis. “It’s unpleasant and we want to send a positive message to employees,” they said. I refused of course and told them I could only speak if I’m allowed to be truthful. Thankfully, they let me keep it in.

Why am I writing about this now? Because as hellish as 2020 has been, I am hopeful that it has paved the way for companies to finally acknowledge and address the increasing public health crisis that has permeated the workplace. Between the erosion of “work/life” balance and our increasing tendency to tie our self-worth to the workplace, mental health issues are on the rise. “Mindfulness” apps like Calm and Headspace are achieving unicorn valuations because as a people we are really twisted up right now.

But this pandemic has kind of leveled the playing field, has it not? When we exchange pleasantries typically, we ask “How are you?” And there is this kind of social pressure to just say, “Good, how are you?” But NOW? Well, no one is good. And it’s OK to say so.

Look at LinkedIn. Pre-pandemic, if you were laid off, you took it as a sign that there was something wrong with you. NOW? Well, people are posting about their job hunt with confidence, and leaning on one another to help.

This week, Matthew Cooper, the CEO of EarnUp publicly stepped down from his post to tend to his mental health, after a hospitalization in August. He writes, “Part of me wants to jump back into the hard and important work my startup, EarnUp, does. However, staying alive and making my health a priority demands a different focus for me at this point.” Bravo.

Arianna Huffington wrote this week that “for the first time, there’s an ‘unprecedented interest from the C-suite in mental health.” Not to be crass, but increasingly poor mental health outcomes impact the financial health of companies too, and maybe that’s enough of a reason for us to collectively wake up.

We are finally turning a page on the year that never seems to end. And I’ve seen the brilliant quote from Dr. Lawrence H. Gerstein, Professor of Psychology at Ball State University, “In the rush to return to ‘normal,’ use this time to consider which parts of normal are worth rushing back to.”

Normal was not working for us as a society — in many ways. I’m hopeful that the stigma around mental health will be something we can someday tell our children about, rather than have them experience it.

In 2021, for business leaders, managers, colleagues, what can you do to take care of yourself and those who rely on you? If we prioritize that, a new era of peace, success, and togetherness will follow. And if you’re struggling to get there, reach out — I will always be happy to hear your story, share mine, and help you realize that you need not be broken just because you’ve had a break. Be well friends.