today feels like a good day to come out
By: B
Tags: Nonbinary, National Coming Out Day, Bisexual, Queer, Dysphoria

happy #comingoutday, tl;dr i’m bisexual and nonbinary!! (this was originally meant as an instagram post but their character limit can’t handle me so here we are!)

cw// discomfort in gender and sexuality, gender dysphoria, mentions of suicide and self-harm.

as many of you likely already know, i’m bisexual!! to me, this means i’m attracted to people regardless of their gender identity, including cisgender and transgender men and women, as well as trans and nonbinary folks, and anyone in between. (if any of these words are new to you, don’t stress!! do a quick google search, a world of info is at your fingertips! remember that it is never someone else’s job to educate you on things they are experiencing, they don’t owe you a word.) my sexuality is something i’ve struggled to understand for many years, and it has evolved with me as i’ve grown up. right now, bisexual is the term i am most comfortable identifying with. this does not mean that anything i previously identified with or will identify with in the future is invalid, it simply means that the fluidity of sexuality and my own personal growth changes the way i view myself and the world around me.

but wait, there’s more!! i also have been playing with the way i identify myself in terms of gender for a long time, and i am happy to share with you that i am nonbinary! to me, this means that i identify with neither the terms of girl or boy, man or woman, but rather something outside of the gender binary completely. once again i’d like to stress that my previous, current, and future ways of identification have all been and continue to be valid: i have been nonbinary since birth — the fact that i was raised as a girl and identified with that/other labels in the past does not invalidate my present and/or future self. since telling some close friends and family that i am nonbinary, many have asked me about my pronouns and i haven’t been able to give a clear answer, because right now i’m really not sure what feels the most comfortable for me! i’ve been referred to with typical “female” pronouns, she/her, for the majority of my life and have never felt a strong connection or sense of comfort in those words. these, among other “feminine” terms (such as sister, daughter, niece, girl, woman, miss, etc) have been a big source of pain and discomfort for me, for many more years and in many more situations than i have been able to put into coherent thoughts through the years. these words have caused extreme gender dysphoria for me and caused me to hate my body, leading to suicidal thoughts and bouts of self-harm that i continue to fight off to this day. now this post is not meant to be a sad one so i will get to the point: please refer to me by using they/them pronouns!!

i am bisexual and nonbinary. but i’m also much more than that!! i am an artist and a cook and a sibling and a friend and so so many more things!! i love myself and my body, i love the colour blue and noodles and the feeling of warm sunshine on my face and dancing in the middle of an intersection at night when there’s no cars coming!! i love me!! ♡