Stretch That Dollar: Single Parenting on a Budget
By: Wendy Miller
Tags: Children, Divorce, Money, Parenting, Budget

Stretch That Dollar: Single Parenting on a Budget

How to make it as a single parent when money is tight

Single parenting is stressful is so many ways, and finances might be one of the biggest sources of that stress. You lose an income when you split from your partner or they pass away. If it’s a split, you have to fight for child support, work out custody, and possibly fight to get the child support that’s been ordered. It’s not easy.

Toss in additional stressors, such as a job loss, global pandemic, or a suddenly sick kid, and it can be overwhelming. Figuring out how to make a budget, and stick to it, with so much uncertainly, can seem impossible.

Without knowing the specifics of your situation, I can’t tell you exactly how to make a budget work for you. But I can give you some tips that I, and other single parents, have found work for us.

Never include child support in your budget

If you’re supposed to receive child support from your ex, never include it in your budget. While many, if not most, noncustodial parents are good about paying their child support on time and in full, some don’t. And you never know when your ex could run into trouble and have to miss a payment through no fault of their own.

If you include child support in your budget, and then it doesn’t come through for some reason, you’ll end up short and unable to pay all your bills.

Instead, make your budget based solely on your own income. Use child support to create a savings account that offers a cushion when you need it. Use it to cover expenses that don’t come up as often or regularly, such as buying the kids new shoes or clothes.

Photo by Philipp Berndt on Unsplash

Downsize your home

If you’re worried about making it financially as a single parent, look for a smaller home. Whether it’s a single family home, a condo or an apartment, a smaller place to live can help your budget stretch a bit further.

A smaller home means smaller bills in other areas beyond your mortgage or rent. You’ll likely have a lower electric bill. If your heating bill is separate, it will also probably be lower.

A smaller home might mean your kids have to share bedrooms instead of having their own. Frame it as a new adventure and a chance for them to get closer with their siblings. Encourage respect for privacy and give each child their own storage options and personal spaces in the bedrooms.

Downgrade your vehicle

If you have a newer car with a car payment, trading it in or selling it may be a good option for saving money. Buy a used car, paid in full with cash if possible. This will save you the monthly car payment, and can also lower your insurance rates.

Depending on the vehicle, it can also save you some money on fuel.

If you’re concerned about the quality of a used car, buy it from a reputable dealer and have a friend or relative who knows a lot about vehicles go with you. Have a mechanic look the vehicle over before you purchase it.

Consider “unconventional” living arrangements

You might be hesitant to look for a roommate. It makes sense. You have kids and you don’t want a stranger living in the same house with them.

But there are other ways you can share living expenses with someone.

You might consider a multi-generational home — living with your parents. Or you might have a sibling, cousin, or friend who is also a single parent and looking for a way to cut costs.

You might also think about a more recent trend where the kids stay in the same home all the time, and the parents rotate in and out. Many parents who do this also split the expense of another apartment or home where they each stay when it’s not their time with the kids. This can be very beneficial, as you can split the expenses on a one-bedroom apartment, plus the family home, much more easily.

Get rid of debt

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If you have a lot of debt, call and see what your options are to eliminate or restructure the debts. You might even work with a credit counselor to see what you can do.

Depending on the amounts and types of debt, you might also take out a personal loan to pay them off and give yourself a single, potentially much lower payment with a single interest rate each month.

If you have a lot of credit cards, take the time to look at the terms of each. Consider whether you really need them all and close out any that you don’t use so you aren’t tempted to start using them to try to stay afloat.

Keep only a couple of credit cards and try to get rid of any balance you’ve been carrying on them. Then, when you use them, try to pay the balances off in full each month. When you consider using them, remind yourself that you want to be able to pay the balance off. Ask yourself if you can do that with this purchase.

Try to keep and use cards that offer rewards — and make sure those rewards are ones you can and will use. Cash back is probably the best reward when you’re a single parent, even if it’s only in the form of a credit on your statement.

Examine your expenses

There are some bills that are unavoidable: electricity, groceries, various insurances, etc. But even when an expense is unavoidable, that doesn’t mean you can’t decrease it.

Contact your electric company and see if they offer any billing options that might decrease your bill. Buy store brand groceries. Get new insurance quotes.

Look at other expenses too. If you consider a cell phone necessary, look for a cheaper plan or provider. If you have cable or subscribe to streaming services, look for less expensive plans or whether you might be subscribing to two services that offer the exact same thing.

Eliminate unnecessary expenses even if they’re ones you really like. You might love your coffee or makeup subscription but eliminating it may be just enough to make your new budget work.

Look for assistance

No one really wants to rely on food stamps, Medicaid, or childcare assistance from the state. But sometimes you need it, even if it’s just for a few months.

This can be particularly important if you’re in school or otherwise working to improve your financial situation. The assistance you get can be enough to allow you to comfortably finish school or do what needs to be done to improve your situation so you can then give up the assistance and support your family fully again.

You don’t have to apply for or accept assistance you don’t need, but if food stamps, healthcare, or childcare assistance would ease your financial burden, reach out and apply.

Check into cheaper childcare

When you have smaller kids, daycare expenses can eat up a huge chunk of your income. While you do get what you pay for, it is possible to find less expensive childcare without sacrificing quality.

Check out other daycare centers by taking tours and talking to staff. If they’re all priced relatively the same, look into private babysitters.

You might even have a friend or family member who would be willing to watch your kids for far less than a daycare would.

Ask for referrals to babysitters or daycares that people you know have used and liked. If you meet with a private sitter, ask for references from other parents.

Don’t forget to look carefully at any contracts, too. Make sure you’re not getting cheaper childcare at the expense of a contract that costs you more when you need to move on or if you need to make a late payment at some point.

Think about switching bank accounts

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Banks often charge multiple fees on personal checking and savings accounts, and those fees can add up fast.

While some fees, such as an overdraft or stop payment fee, will be charged anywhere, there are many other fees that you can avoid simply by switching accounts or even banks.

Check local banks and credit unions to compare fees. But don’t forget about online options as well. Many online-only banks offer very affordable, or even free, accounts that can save you a lot of money.

Look for apps to help you save

There are several apps, such as Ibotta or Gasbuddy, that help you save money on things like groceries, clothes, and even gas.

These apps are typically free, but do check them over to see how you can save. Some require uploading receipts, while others require activating deals and using them within a certain amount of time. Knowing what you need to do will make the apps most useful.

These apps may not save you a ton of money, but over time, the small savings can add up.

Don’t forget about looking for promo codes for online shopping as well. Honey is a great option for finding the lowest prices on things as well as finding promo codes.

Save windfalls

A tax refund. An inheritance. A Christmas bonus. Any time you get a large chunk of money that wasn’t expected or part of your budget, save as much of it as you can.

It’s tempting, especially when you’re living on a tight budget, to spend those windfalls immediately. To buy things you’ve been wanting, or the kids have been wanting, but you’ve had to say no to. To treat yourself to a meal out or something else.

But the best thing you can do is save that money for a situation when money gets even tighter.

The second-best thing you can do is use some of it to pay off existing debt. If you have debt, and a windfall can pay off most or all of it, freeing up more money each month going forward, go ahead and pay off the debt.

Skip payday loans

It’s tempting to use places like Amscot for a quick and easy loan. But the interest you’ll pay is often much higher than you might pay through a bank or credit union, and you’ll usually have a much shorter time period to pay it back.

People who use these types of loans often end up finding themselves getting into more and more debt because of them.

If you need quick cash, try asking a friend or relative for a loan, selling something you own and don’t need or use, or working out a payment arrangement so you don’t need as much money all at once.

Don’t panic

Above all, don’t panic. Money may be tight but you’ll get through it to better times.

More importantly, remember that money isn’t what makes you a good parent. Your kids will remember these as good times if you make sure that’s what they see.

Turn sharing a bedroom into an adventure. Make meals that are made up of random on-sale items into a gourmet feast by dressing up and using “fancy” dishes. Make a day at the park as thrilling as a day at a theme park by bringing a picnic and using imagination.

Let them remember those things instead of a parent who was constantly worried about money. When money is no longer an issue, you’ll be glad you did.