Greater-Than and the Law of Large Numbers
By: Agents Of Change
Tags: Life Lessons, Personal Development, Self-awareness, Self Improvement, Men

Greater-Than and the Law of Large Numbers

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By Jon Ochiai

We can leverage criticism or personal dismissal to create our next greater-than versions.

We continually reinvent our greater-than versions. Sometimes, we reinvent ourselves amidst the talking heads and haters who say that we can’t, that we’re not good enough. Often these critics occur as irrelevant, given that we’re the one in Theodore Roosevelt’s Man in the Arena, the one who dares to “fail bravely”. Yet, what our critics say can be valuable, even transformative. Their numbers matter. Just saying.

If one person calls me a dick, then so be it. However, say 10 or 20 people call me a dick, then that becomes statistically significant. Again, just saying.

In mathematics, there is the Law of Large Numbers. The Law of Large Numbers states: If you repeat an experiment independently a large number of times and average the result, the result you obtain should be close to the expected value.

So, on average, I’m a dick. I experienced that when I was younger and much more stupid. Now, much less so. I work on my greater-than versions of me. At least I hope so, both heuristically and euphemistically. I’m just guessing. After all, my legacy shall be defined by those I’ve touched or influenced after I’m no longer.

Do the math: The numbers on average don’t lie. Sure, it’s purposeful to pursue what’s meaningful to you and to me in the sea of doubters and naysayers. Yet, we can leverage criticism or personal dismissal to create our next greater-than versions. Nothing’s personal. Really.

The late NBA Hall of Famer and Academy Award Winner Kobe Bryant said, “Failure excites me.” He used his failures to work on what’s next. Mizukami Sensei told me when I fucked up in Aikido practice and gave me loud constructive direction. I transformed my failure into my dedication to mastery in Aikido, and in life. Mad love and respect to Sensei.

Acknowledging the Law of Large Numbers in the realm of criticism, I leverage that in working on what’s next, grinding it out, and putting in the work.

About 15 years ago, I lead a requirements definition team to develop a new advanced satellite system. I composed my charts for a Design Review presentation. During Design Review rehearsals, it became transparent that I was a weak presenter. I sucked. Almost straight garbage.

My best friend and mentor Chuck told me that I needed to work on my presentation skills and that someone else would brief my charts at the Design Review. I was absolutely pissed. Still, I got that Chuck’s criticism was authentic. He told me that out of mad love and respect. After getting over myself, I looked for training that I could do. I asked my Manager Neil if I could enroll in the company Presentation Training Course. Neil said that the course cost a lot of money. That wasn’t a viable option.

Following advice from my best friend and big brother John, I enrolled in Toastmasters to practice the art of public speaking. Somewhere, I had read a statistic that people actually feared public speaking more than death itself. WTF? Taking on public speaking, I soon got the distinction. John, the renowned professional speaker and successful business coach, was my profound Sensei on this journey.

I worked on my Toastmasters speeches with John. I remember struggling particularly with a speech. I suffered trying to make it perfect. John poignantly said, “Talk to me like your friend. Trust that the words coming out of you will be true.”

He said that I’m just telling a story to a group of people, whether it’s one person or 1000. In either case, I still talk to one person at a time. I talk to one person, then move on to the next person. I got it. I got John.

Yeah, I gave a great speech at Toastmasters. I won best speech that evening. I loved public speaking and got good at it. I put in the work. I just trained. I was as authentic as I could be and said something that was meaningful to me. That wouldn’t have occurred had I just dismissed my critics, the haters, and not truly embraced my failure.

Sure, it’s essential to do regardless of what others think. Still, what others think, especially in large numbers, may distinguish what we must work on in our next greater-than iterations. I’m reminded of the humblest man I knew on Planet Earth, the late Mizukami Sensei, who told me, “Just train. It’s not like you have to get somewhere.” Amen.

We just train, evolve, and expand into our greater space, our greater versions of ourselves. Perhaps on that path, we can make the world a greater place, too. Just saying.

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This story was originally published on The Good Men Project.

About Jon Ochiai

Jon Ochiai has been a Satellite Systems Engineer for nearly 30 years. Jon was born and raised in Pearl City, HI before moving to Los Angeles after graduate school at the University of Hawaii. He is also an Aikido Instructor, 4th-degree black belt. A great movie fan, Jon has written over 400 movie reviews on imdb.com. Author of Living With Love: The Way of the Warrior.