The Grounding
By: Tom Sadira
Tags: Science Fiction, Aviation, Literature, Fiction, Drama

Mike traced his jawline with the disposable razor, then flicked a wad of hair-speckled shaving cream into the sink. Steam clung to the mirror and obscured his view, so he wiped it away with a hand towel. Normally, he’d crack the bathroom door to let the hot cloud of moisture out. But today he kept it shut and locked. It was the only way to make sure she didn’t barge in and start wailing on him again.

After a few more careful scrapes around his chin, the shaving was done. As he cupped water in his hands, ready to splash it against his face, he locked eyes with himself in the mirror.

It’d been years since he looked so fresh, so together. Before everything changed, he’d been at the top of his game: the ace, the patriot, the hero. Mike felt a surge of his younger self rising up, ready to take on the world once again. He even managed to smile — a real smile, too, not one of the dusty, fake smiles he’d bring out for birthdays and special occasions. Real smiles were another thing The Grounding has taken away. Until today.

He finished up and pulled on his old flight suit. There wasn’t much time, and he knew it wouldn’t matter what clothes he wore, but he wanted to look the part.

When he got downstairs, Sadie was sitting by herself at the kitchen table, staring out the window. A cigarette burned in one hand while the other fiddled with a crumpled tissue. Two plates of congealed eggs and blackened bacon sat untouched. He could tell by the red streaks running down on her cheeks that she’d done more crying, although they looked perfectly dry now.

“Good morning,” he said, sitting across from her and pulling one of the plates closer. “Thanks for breakfast.”

“Fuck you,” she said without looking away from the window.

He cut some egg, stabbed it with his fork, and shoved it in his mouth, ignoring that it was cold and rubbery. Rather than killing his appetite, anticipation had always made him ravenous, just like it had during his years at the flight academy. Again, he felt the memory of his youth embrace him, letting him know everything would be okay. Everything would be back to normal — he’d finally be back to normal — once he got off the ground.

Mike sipped some lukewarm coffee and looked at his wife in a way he hadn’t since the world went to shit. He studied her features: her slender neck, her dark curls, her smooth, olive skin. In the fifteen years he’d known her she just kept getting more and more beautiful.

She was the one person in the world he hoped would understand, yet she’d spent the last seventy-two hours trying to talk him out of it. She’d cried. She’d screamed. She’d threatened. She’d even begged him to stay, her face tensed with more vulnerability and pain than it had when she gave birth to Bobby. Now, in their final moments together, she was colder than a clam in an ice bucket.

The mid-morning light sparkled off her eyes and found his. He felt his heart waver, so he looked away and summoned the exhilaration of being twenty thousand feet in the air. Once it steadied, he sipped more coffee and lifted his eyes across the table.

“Look, I can imagine how you must feel. If I were you, I’d have a hard time accepting — ”

“A hard time?” She snickered and exhaled a cloud of grey smoke. “Living with you for the past nine years was the hard time. Once you walk out that door, things’ll get a whole like easier for me and Bobby.” She stubbed out her cigarette on her eggs, grabbed another from the pack, and popped it between her lips. She sparked it up and sucked in deeply, like someone coming up for air. “Let’s not bullshit each other anymore, okay? I know you’re in a hurry. So am I. So eat up and get out of here.”

Mike sighed and chewed some bacon. “Bobby still asleep?”

“Mack stopped by while you were in the shower. They took off into the woods.”

“You let him leave?” Mike set his fork down hard. “I wanted to say goodbye to him before I left.”

“Yeah? Well, too bad.”

“What the hell’s wrong with you? He’s my son! And you’re my wife, goddammit! Can’t I get a little support here?”

Sadie took another puff from her cigarette and turned back to the window.

“This is what I was born to do, Sadie. I’m a goddamn fighter pilot. I was born to fly and fight, which is what I intend to do in a couple hours. Why can’t you understand that? Why can’t you have my back, like you used to?”

“The man I fell in love with was a brave, cocky cadet. And still a human being. Now you’re just…” She thumbed the cigarette filter. “The world’s changed, Mike. And you seem to be one of the dumbasses who hasn’t figured it out yet.”

“You’re right. You’re exactly right. I won’t accept what they’ve done to us. To me. I haven’t given up yet. I’m meeting the challenge head-on, like a man.”

“Oh, get over yourself!” She pounded the table and glared at him. “You’re no hero, Mike! And I don’t even think you’re like all the morons in the early days who disappeared into the sky and left their families behind. That hurt bad enough, having a husband so depressed and stupid he’d commit suicide. But last night the truth hit me. Even though it hurts way worse, I’m glad I finally figured you out. Know what you are, Mike? You’re a fucking coward.” She flicked her cigarette at him. It bounced off his chest and sent embers scattering across his empty plate. “You’re scared shitless and you’re running away. That’s why I didn’t poison your breakfast with food poisoning or flatten the tires on your truck. You’d just find some other way to escape. So fuck you, Mike. The door’s right there.”

“Dammit, Sadie! You’re missing the whole point! I’m going up there to fight back! Don’t you understand? To win! To put things right! To make a better world for you and Bobby.”

“You had the last nine years to make our world better, but all you did was sit on that damn couch and sulk. You gave up and got drunk and felt sorry for yourself while the world crumbled around you. While I crumbled around you.”

Mike pushed his plate away and looked at his hands. “It’s not just me they stole from. They took everything from us. They robbed humanity of our ability to travel, to communicate, to explore. They — ”

“Who the fuck is they, Mike? They don’t even exist! No one knows why it happened or who’s behind it. No one can stop it. And even if there was a they capable of making thousands of planes vanish, do you really think you’re any match for them?”

“It wasn’t just planes. That day, that goddamn day, choppers, satellites — even the International Space Station, for Christ’s sake! — all gone in the blink of an eye. It’s not fair. It’s not right.”

“What the hell do you think you’ll accomplish? You don’t even know what you’re up against! Aliens? God? Some crazy natural phenomenon? We heard all the theories on the news. No one has any idea what caused it. Have you thought of that? What the hell do you plan to do once you vanish? Huh, tough guy? Punch your way back? That first year, your bosses sent up hundreds of fighters equipped with armed nukes, Mike. Hundreds of nukes! You think you can do better in a rusty, old crop duster! All you’re doing is throwing your life away. You’re throwing mine and Bobby’s life away, too. Think this world’s fucked up now? Imagine how fucked up things will be tomorrow when Bobby wakes up without his dad.”

Mike put his hands in his lap so she couldn’t see them tremble.

“It should never have happened the way it did. I lost Barry. I lost Phil. I lost most of the guys I served with. No answer. No explanation. Just, poof! — gone. Anything we sent into the air vanished. Where’d they all go? They must be somewhere, Sadie! I was scheduled to be in the air that day. I was supposed to be with them, to face whatever the hell they’re facing.”

“That’s right, Mike, but you were at home on paternity leave with your wife and your newborn son. Don’t think I haven’t noticed how much you regret that. You rubbed my face in it every time you slunk into the couch and cracked open another beer. For nine years you’ve acted like a child who’s missed out on some fucking party. Well, go on! Old Man Wilfred found you a one-way ticket to go back in time, didn’t he? What are you waiting for? Get out of here, you coward!” She flung her coffee mug at the wall beside him. “Any man who’d abandon his family for some self-serving, suicidal breakdown bullshit isn’t a man we want around! Do you hear me? Go! Now!” She pushed her chair back and stormed down the hall.

Mike wanted nothing more than to match her anger: scream, flip the table, maybe shake some sense into her. Instead, he downed the rest of his coffee, set his flight cap neatly on his head, and walked out the front door.