Finding Your Way To Be Happy and Stay in Resilience
By: La Dolce Vita Diary
Tags: Happiness, Goals, Personal Growth, 2020, Self

Finding Your Way To Be Happy and Stay in Resilience

You’ve come so far this year — don’t stop now.

Photo by mauro paillex on Unsplash

As we look back on 2020, all is not lost and there will be many gains to report back. We have history as proof. On the other side from past pandemics and world wars, the world developed revolutionary new ways that may otherwise never have been birthed.

Growth is inevitable. Unlike war post-trauma, there was no personal attack on a country. We all rose together as a nation and a world.

Most importantly, we gained connection, compassion, empathy, and our human-ness in a non-stop growing digital world. We learned to pause and value people over things.

With the fresh start of 2021, we have a bittersweet beginning ahead, where a vaccine solution is out, but every day will not change immediately for us.

As we embrace new and old ways, we should all be congratulated for showing up, with the strength we continue to express daily.

You personally made it this far with flying colors, written in a journal or two, shared in countless texts, post and comments, and reached out to others in a way that only you can do.

You’ve gone through a few tough trials all at once, that has helped you grow and force you into a better future, even though you can’t see the outcome.

Here are a couple ways to keep going, growing, and stay in your resilience.

Get space, so you can get inspired.

With the extra time you have, find some time to end this year taking note of the good that came out of your year. Remind yourself of some things you’ve been grateful for this past year. Find ways to quiet your old brain from sabotaging your positive thoughts.

Here are some reminders:

You made at least one new group of friends gathering and participating in virtual communities.

You stayed connected, shared, and witnessed what interesting things that your longtime and good friends, did. They displayed them as photos and words on social media. Maybe you lived vicariously through them as they snapped photos of places they visited that inspired you.

You learned about new cultures, and better organizing and cooking tips, watching Netflix series and flipping past PBS and public television shows.

You had a chance to have quiet time and evaluate what’s important. You got serious about what you enjoy, worked on your hobbies, and spent time alone in outdoor and indoor time.

You made creative meals from ingredients you didn’t know you had, and you reinvented your cozy space and couch with your memory foam stamped body impression.

You discovered new ways to do things where you now have a better process.

Remind yourself you did these things. And all the things.

Then remind yourself of your last half-decade years, that was super critical to your growth, as it brought you to where and who you are today. Your next 5 years are even more important because they dictate the direction start to the rest of your life.

Think of what you were grateful for in the past 5 years or stretch out to the past decade if you’re a bit older. Maybe you had many occasions and outings to celebrate life. Maybe you got more work-life-balance, self-love, new love in your life with a 4-legged pet or passion, got comfortable in your skin, and adopted a new identity.

You freed yourself from your past chains and can celebrate those wins.

Just think, 10 years ago, social media was just getting started. No one knew how to use the tools with the rest of the world, as we clumsily grew our way through (similar to this year). And through the unclarity, the rocket ship found a way to lift off. We have a world library of knowledge and global rolodex at our fingertips. We have no where to go, but up.

Reminding yourself to see the progress will help you get through this season and thrive in the next.

Redefine happiness.

This year you lowered your bar of perfection, expectation, and achievement goals. You’ve had to redefine your life.

You can also take steps to redefine your happiness (what makes you happy).

For me, and maybe similarly for you, I changed and redefined happiness years before the pandemic where I abruptly lost jobs, relationships, and was forced to make transitions and pivots. If I stayed in pity, that would have led to self-sabotage and counter-productivity. And I wasn’t willing to give up more time than I already felt I lost. Can you relate this past year?

So I started finding joy in the simple things like capturing photos of nature, biting into a juicy piece of fruit, sipping on lovely tea, taking a relaxing bath listening to John Mayer or Van Morrison, or having a simple text exchange with a friend.

And after practicing enjoying the simple things, I felt appreciation had washed over me. There was an invisible space created for what has always been there and all around, where I felt as though I turned my head sideways and for the first time, saw the world differently and freshly saw the things in front of me. The shift was gradual and happened over years, but when I did take note of the change, I felt deeper gratitude for life.

I knew these enlightened feelings came from inside me, my breath and my positive thoughts at the very least. Because when you start from inside you, that’s where you find the hidden keys that unlock your happiness. You can use your external senses to help you stay appreciating.

When you align the positive things in the outside world to the good feelings inside you, then you can experience full happiness or joy in a complex and modern world. The joy brings in peace and attracts love and compassion. And the inner peace then brings more joy into your life’s passion.

That’s different than situational happiness that can put on an emotional roller coaster where one minute you’re happy, the next you’re sad.

“Work like you don’t need money. Love like you’ve never been hurt. And dance like no one’s watching.” — Alfred D. Souza

To a skeptic or pessimist, this can sound like settling, recalibrating and getting less than. Contentment is the opposite. Because when you’re content you get off the nervous breakdown ride.

By removing your up and down emotions, you can discover what you really want to do in control with your time, and where time is the only asset we have no control over.

This year went by in a blink of an eye (and maybe not fast enough). Next year doesn’t have to be a repeat as you grew in more ways than you know now. In your continued progress, keep breathing new ways, stay inspired, and dare to redefine happiness.