Why a Man’s Masculinity is Essential to a Woman
By: Logston Peggie
Tags: Masculinity, Relationships, Self, Women, Love

Photo by Becca Tapert on Unsplash

There are certain traits that we heterosexual women look for in a man. Things like kindness, intelligence, a great sense of humor and a well-oiled perspective. I like to call it seasoning — it’s those underlying sexy qualities in man that really sets a woman’s heart ablaze. That being said, what one woman might consider a deal-breaker about a man’s personality may simultaneously be the reason another falls in love with him — beauty really is in the heart of the beholder.

“Beauty is no quality in things themselves: It exists merely in the mind which contemplates them; and each mind perceives a different beauty.” ― David Hume

Nice, huh?

Tell you what else is pretty damn nice — men. Yup, I love men.

Give me a man with natural charm, an open mind and a great sense of humor, and I’m totally down for his company. I am a woman who can truly appreciate the different and often unique perspective a man will offer on any given situation, too.

The way men are wired, how they think and behave, is frequently delightful and at times — really amusing. I admire the male physique and how he contrasts and feels against my body, and honestly, there is no better feeling in the world to a woman than snuggling into the arms of the man she loves.

Ah, nirvana for lovers.

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https://mane-ki-man.medium.com/another-wave-the-same-mistakes-b5a1c97e8aa0?postPublishedType=initial

https://bossvai.medium.com/the-great-reset-this-is-not-a-test-this-is-not-a-conspiracy-ee3df23ef91c

For a woman like me, her man’s arms are the sweet, safe place away from the world, like her own sacred slice of masculine security.

Simple, and yet, there it is — a man’s masculinity is the one quality essential to us and I’ll tell you why — only a man can bring that pure, masculine dynamic into a situation and above all else, a woman like me is most attracted to man who makes her feel like a woman.

It doesn’t matter how independent, ambitious or strong we are either.

She could be a ball-breaking CEO who has clawed her way to the top in a male-dominated corporate world, or she could be a creative soul who regularly experiences the resistance offered by her male counterparts in her industry. Regardless, when it comes to her personal relationships, what a woman most really appreciates about a man is how his natural masculinity makes her feel when she’s around him.

The Modern Man nails it perfectly in their article, Definition of a Real Man:

“A real man is a man with genuine self-confidence and true masculinity. He’s a man who knows his own mind and knows what he’s about in life, and he’s not afraid to stand up for what he believes in. When a man has these qualities, he has a natural self-assuredness that makes him stand out head and shoulders above other men, and women feel an instinctive sexual attraction towards him because he has what it takes to protect her and provide for her, allowing her to relax into being a woman in the relationship.”

No matter how fast the world transforms with shifting gender roles, some things never change. Like the energy between men and women. Not to mention that a man who possesses a nice dollop of strong masculine energy and knows how to embody that part of himself, is downright sexy.

And, seasoned.

That’s because the saucy, masculine man is someone who is emotionally stronger than your average dude, ready to face the fire when necessary, and much more masculine in the way he thinks, behaves and takes action in life.

Though right now, women the world over are struggling to find him.

How come? I hear you ask.

Well, before the term Metrosexual became the latest buzzword on cyber-balls alley, there was once a time when men used to be the real deal. These now rare creatures had more style than the hair care section of a fashion magazine, and followed a certain code of honor that involved treating each other and all women with respect. Unfortunately, those days are now a thing of the past.

For the most part.

Of course, there are still men around who have their affairs in order — who have backbone, strength of character and authentic presence; and who embrace their God-given, musky masculinity like the men they are.

They’re just, well … uncommon.

David French from National Review has his own ideas about why men’s masculinity is on the decrease:

“In the age of zero-tolerance school-disciplinary policies — where any kind of physical confrontation is treated like a human-rights violation — boys have less opportunity to develop toughness. Today’s young males don’t have common touchstones for what it’s like to grow up to be a man.”

Interesting, don’t you think?

In a recent discussion with my husband about it, I wasn’t surprised when he whole-heartedly agreed that many of his counterparts have increasingly lost touch with their masculinity.

Granted, this is a man who is clearly in sync with his own fragrant male energy.

Yes, he uses way too much of my Argan oil to smooth his long, wild tresses, and has his own collection of skin care products; but he also owns every bit of who he is, has the heart of a lion and still believes in the ever-dying art of chivalry — never have I witnessed him disrespect a woman in any manner or form, nor have I seen him run for cover when life throws him an unexpected loop.

In fact, one of my husband’s most admirable traits is that he is a fighter and not a flighter, which is a hallmark quality of masculinity. His deep sense of protectiveness over me and our children makes me feel safe and secure in the knowledge that he has my back, and that’s important to a woman.

Another contributing factor of the decrease in masculinity may lie in this entire era frequently dubbed as the “information age”. As far as I can see, cyber-balls are everywhere, yet scarce when it comes to the real stuff like acknowledging feelings, relationships, showing respect, embracing change and finding courage at a crucial moment.

Right? It’s no secret that the internet has made a serious impact on the way we interact with each other, and social media has snatched away the need for real interaction.

The truth is that a whole new breed of men has emerged from cyber space reality, or rather, un-reality — and many have lost sight of the true essence of their masculinity.

Interpersonal confrontations … people using the internet as a shield, hiding behind IP addresses in order to fool with the minds of women who may genuinely care about them.

Ghosting, catfishing and breadcrumbing — have we become subhuman?

Meh.

The situation appears dire, but try not to be too disheartened, dear reader. I did mention that there are still men out there who are in touch with their masculinity and who also remember how to treat a woman like a lady.

Great news.

These are the kind of men who realize that if they can make a woman feel her femininity, then they will have unlocked the key to the one quality she truly needs in a man.

Even better news.

So, what does this spirited, masculine-empowered man look like?

While there is no such thing as the “perfect man” (or woman, for that matter), there are a few common traits that a man who embodies his masculinity will demonstrate.

A man who is in touch with his masculinity…

Knows Exactly What He Wants

Let’s be honest — a man who can make a decision is extremely attractive. Not just about the big things, but the small things, too.

He knows where he is taking his woman for dinner, or which cozy cabin in the woods he plans on spending a week together away from the world.

This guy makes it his business to know her know her business, too, because he understands that her desires impact his own in a vital way and that love is a two-way street. Her wants, needs and passions are an important part of his life.

No matter what the circumstances, real men are just as concerned for the feelings, needs and minds of women as they are for their own.

A masculine man possesses that zesty spark in his eye when speaks of his ambitions, dreams and plans for the future. He’s got drive and purpose that matches the love of his woman, and he’s not afraid to take a leap of faith.

Follows His Path and Ignores Adversity

None of us can escape those “two-cent” people in our lives who always have something to say about we are a doing, who we are and who we want to become.

Moreover, life has a way of presenting adverse situations and seemingly immovable obstacles along the path toward going for what lights us up on the inside.

That is, our heart’s desire.

One of the most masculine traits a man can embrace is the ability to ignore those irrelevant opinions and work on his own craft.

A real man will follow his dreams no matter how much reality suggests they are impossible to achieve. Don’t get me wrong, he’s not always perfect at this. He might sway off the right track at times when hitting that all-too consuming “dip”, and that’s normal. But he will pick himself up to eventually keep reaching and striving toward his true calling because he knows that being true to himself is the only way to achieve real fulfilment in life — perseverance will ultimately pay off.

A man who is touch with his masculinity will set his sights firmly on his goal, keep the bigger picture fresh in his mind’s eye and believe that anything is possible; because it really is.

Exhibits Powerful Body Language

Smoking hot is the man who exhibits strong body language.

He exudes self-confidence and comprehends the correlation between his body language and how others see him. His masculine energy demands respect, though he is realistic enough to understand that there will always be obstacles — internal demons to conquer and otherwise.

He also knows that with the right mindset and a whole lot of heart, there is nothing that he can’t rise above and overcome, therefore, he stands strong in his presence even when he’s not entirely feeling it.

This beautiful man knows that others treat him the way he shows them how he wants to be treated. As a result of the masculine energy that surrounds him, he has no problem finding a way towards what he wants.

A man who is touch with his masculine energy has an inviting body language which attracts others toward him and provides them with feelings of comfort and security.

Knows to Make His Woman Feel Like a Woman

He will always treat a woman like a lady. No matter what.

As mentioned earlier, the honest truth is that every woman wants to feel safe and secure next to her man. A real man does that for her and more, and he’s not threatened by a woman who can hold her own beside him.

For instance, my husband knows that I am more than capable of standing my ground against his fiery, dominate male nature. He will often say that “I am one lippy woman”.

Interestingly enough, he finds my strong sense-of-self incredibly sexy.

And the fact that he does find my assertive nature as arousing as my more unassuming and gentler attributes fascinates me to no end. No one else has ever shown the mental and emotional stamina to be able to handle who I really am as a woman and my place in this world; choosing instead to oppress my individuality by means of super-controlling and brute behavior.

The point is that a man who is solid in his own male energy knows that allowing a woman to freely express herself in his presence is a gift to them both as it creates deeper meaning and balance between the sexes.

It’s like honoring the powerful flow of the yin and yang elements, which touches on the purest layers of love.

Naturally, when a man is conscious of uncovering balanced love with his feminine he doesn’t just focus on her outwardly appearance, possessions or status: he is fully aware that as beautiful as she is now, physical beauty fades with time.

Therefore, he will intentionally focus his love and attention on her true beauty, which is found within her sensibilities, soul-essence and personality.

He will protect his woman physically and emotionally; and is ready to throw a good punch if necessary, to defend her from physical aggressors.

A man who is touch with his masculine energy is someone who will engage his woman in meaningful discussions about life and plans for their shared future. He displays an awareness, intelligence and sensitivity that makes his actions not only timely, but also genuinely charming.