Lifestyle Tips for a Happy and Successful Life
By: Chana Harris
Tags: Personal Development, Lifestyle, Goal Setting, Inner Peace, Happiness

Lifestyle Tips for a Happy and Successful Life

Photo by Jason Hogan on Unsplash

This is what I started doing to change my life in pursuit of lasting inner peace and happiness.

Set realistic goals

And write them down.

Be clear about what you want to achieve and why. The reason why you are doing something is going to be your motivating source. It is just as if not more important than what you are doing.

Set a realistic timeline. I can’t stress this enough. The goals need to be realistic and set for a realistic date. If you set an unrealistic goal, it’s going to lower your motivation and self-confidence. Be realistic. Start small, achieve your goal, set a new goal, repeat.

Baby steps. “Rome wasn’t built overnight.”

Make detailed plans for the attainment of your goals. If things don’t go 100% as planned, that is ok. That’s life. Being able to adapt and go with the flow is a crucial part of happiness.

It’s good to have someone close to you to hold you accountable for your goals or a group of trusted and motivated people, but announcing your goals to the world can actually lower your chances of reaching them.

I find it best to keep quiet, work hard, and let the results do all the talking.

You can set all kinds of goals, career, relationship, personal, health, and financial goals.

Now some side notes I want to mention. It is important to find a healthy balance of living in the now and planning for the future. Life is happening now. Ensure that the journey is just as important and enjoyable to you as the attainment of your goal. Don’t become so focused on the endpoint that you forget to live in the present moment.

The ability to be happy is available right now.

If you’re working towards something because you think achieving it will bring you happiness, it will only be temporary. Happiness needs to be found and achieved at this moment. It comes from within and from the things money can’t buy. Of course, a certain amount of money is needed to provide stability and financial freedom and security. Still, at some point, material things are bought to fill the void. The feeling fades quickly, and we tend to continue down the path of bigger, better, more, which is not the pathway to happiness.

That being said, I personally love setting realistic goals and achieving them. It’s a feeling of victory within, and when set in alignment with your true beliefs, they help you be a more true yet better version of yourself. Growth.

Visualization

Visualize and feel yourself living your dreams.

Seeing your goal clearly in your mind is so important. Let me tell you why, if you live in Los Angeles and you’re planning to travel to New York City, you would be wise to know what direction New York is in. Now, you can take the train, drive a car, take an airplane, or hell, you could even walk if you really wanted to, but the most important thing is you know where you’re going. IF you point yourself in the direction of where you want to go, and you keep going, you will get there.

You need to feel on the inside as if you already have your dreams to manifest them in your outer world. If you don’t feel happy on the inside and you’re constantly in a negative state, that’s going to be reflected in your outer world and attracted to you. Change needs to start within. Change your inner world, and your outer world will soon follow.

If you can’t visualize yourself as a millionaire because you don’t feel like it’s possible, start smaller. Start with a smaller, more realistic goal. I can’t stress this enough. You need to believe it’s possible first to manifest it. The universe responds to how you feel.

The concept of BE-DO-HAVE can be taken from Neale Donald Walsch’s Conversations With God. We tend to think if we have something, for example, $10,000, then we’ll be happy. The BE-DO-HAVE concept suggests that if we’re happy now and feel as if we already have $10,000, then we open up the doorway for it to come. Of course, you still have to work for it, but if you feel like you’ll never be rich, then you’ve already lost.

This leads me to my next point:

Gratitude

Focus on things that you are happy about and thankful for now.

Do this as often as you can!!

Find the blessing in your current situation.

The more you begin to replace negative thoughts with happier thoughts, the more your life begins to change.

What we focus on we attract.

Now trust me, I know this is easier said than done. I get it. Sometimes I am depressed and anxious as hell and can’t see or feel the good in anything. BUT being in a state of gratitude is the best way to manifest things. You’re already thanking the universe for what you have and what you would like to have.

Being in a state of ‘want’ is affirming that we don’t have what we want. I hope you’re following me here because this is important. Let me repeat: When we are in a state of wanting something, we affirm that we don’t have what we want. In contrast, when we are in a state of gratitude, we are thanking the universe for what it has given us and opens the doors for more blessings and manifestations to pour in. Focus on what you are truly grateful for and happy about in your life, and more of that will come. Even if it’s as simple as you’re thankful for your family or your best friends or the bed you get to sleep in. The more you do this, the easier it gets, and the more you begin to change your mindset from negative to positive. And thus your life.

Meditation

Seriously you need to start meditating.

Ok, you don’t need to do anything, but meditation really does drastically improve your life when done regularly. Trust me. I know it sucks in the beginning. I used to hate meditating too. I couldn’t sit still for longer than 30 seconds when I first started. My thoughts were racing through my mind out of control. Out of control, hence why we need to meditate. Slow those thoughts down and gain a little bit of control over what goes on in your head.

The more you can control your mind, the more you can keep yourself in the present moment. Not worrying about the future or dwelling on the past.

This is the way to transform your inner world.

You can read more about how I got started and stuck with meditation here:

https://chanaharris.medium.com/how-and-why-i-started-meditating-5fbfc423e69?sk=735e4fcecc08bf6f744f3507929a642b

Self-reflection

The not so fun one.

Not the easiest or most enjoyable thing to do, but once you get through the hard stuff, a radical change in your life begins to occur.

Reflect on your thoughts, feelings, and actions.

For one, I self-reflect probably way too much and used to obsess over every aspect of myself. Along the way, I’ve learned to be kind to myself as I push myself forward. Some questions to ask yourself:

Are you acting and behaving how you want to?

Are you happy?

What are your beliefs, and why?

Are your thoughts mostly positive or negative?

What bad habits would you like to replace with good habits?

Think about the ideal version of yourself. Is what you’re doing daily bringing you closer to that reality?

The less inner conflict we have, the happier and more peaceful we are. This is why knowing yourself or self-realization is so important, not just for us but for the world. If we each do our part to solve our own inner conflict to reach a state of inner peace and happiness, this will begin to transform our world.

The power of to-do lists

Ok, start making to-do lists today.

Seriously.

And then get them done.

Not much explaining to do here.

Just do it.

The power of to-do lists truly changed my life. Am I someone who gets my to-do list done 100% of the time? No. But I am a lot happier when I do. Keeping up with chores and errands keeps the mind clear. Know that you will feel better, keeping up with the things you need to do in the long run. “Short term sacrifices for long term happiness.”

To ensure you keep up with them, I suggest again to be realistic. Don’t give yourself 800 things to do in one day. Be realistic, prioritize what’s important and get it done.

Clean and organize

Clean your living space.

Go through your things and get rid of things that you don’t need or use. Donate or sell them. This includes all things, anything in your home!

Organize your space. Make it functional and tidy.

Life is 1000x better when you’re living space is clean and organized.

Less is more people, over-consumption is killing the planet, and it does not make us happier!!

I want to mention something that illustrates the tie between an organized space and a happy life. I was reading Anthony Bourdain’s Kitchen Confidential, and he tells this story that one of his former boss’ highlights so well. To summarize the story quickly, what happens is Anthony Bourdain’s boss stresses the importance of keeping your work station clean. One of his colleagues fails to do so. His station is full of the remnants of chopped herbs, peppercorns, shallot and garlic peels. His boss sees this asks his employee to take his hand and press it down on his workstation. He then lifts his hand to see everything stuck to it. “You see this. This is what the inside of your head looks like.”

Seek balance

This, my friends, is the key to life.

This is it. No one is perfect. Trying to avoid ever indulging in your pleasures can also be harmful to you. Now ok, if your pleasure happens to be heroin or crack cocaine, then it’s best to avoid that altogether, but let’s say something you love to do is eating chocolate cake, ok then I would suggest eating healthy and clean 80–85% of the time and indulging yourself every once in a while. You are the only one who knows how you feel. If eating chocolate cake too often makes you feel bad about yourself, then know that you have the power to change that.

Find the balance that works for you. Balance is going to look a little different to everyone, don’t compare your life to the lives of others.

I used to be an extremist. I would restrict myself so much and deny myself from things that, sure, maybe aren’t the healthiest for me, but in moderation, make me happy. This complete restriction leads to an unbalance. I’ve learned the hard way that balance is the key. Listen to your inner guidance system. If partying too often makes you unhappy because you’re falling behind on your to-do lists and priorities and you’re tired, then party a little less often. You don’t need to quit altogether. Just find the balance.

Practice self-discipline

The more you practice your self-discipline, the more it grows and becomes stronger, like training your muscles at the gym.

Self-discipline is needed to be in control of yourself, your life and your happiness. It stops you from giving in to your bad habits.

Being a victim of your bad habits causes inner conflict and unhappiness.

Again, balance. Don’t restrict yourself too much. We are supposed to have fun and enjoy our lives too!!

To build your self-discipline, set small goals for yourself, for example, the things I just talked about. Keep up with your chores and daily to-do lists. Exercise regularly and eat healthily. Perhaps you want to start waking up earlier, set a goal to wake up early and do it. Keep the reason WHY you’re waking up early in your mind to boost your motivation. Don’t beat yourself up if you don’t succeed at first, do your best and keep going.

Start journaling

I truly believe it transforms your life. Really.

Write down your ideas and recurring thoughts you have.

And if you hate journaling or it’s not for you, that’s ok.

You don’t have to do anything here that I’m suggesting; I’m just sharing what has changed my own life. Journaling is one of them. I started pouring out every thought and feeling I had within me, and as you do so, you begin to heal. Reading your own words is a powerful thing. Not only does it help to clear your mind, but it’s therapeutic to write out your concerns and worries or what you feel happy or sad about.

and last but certainly not least:

Take care of your mind, body, and soul

Eat healthily. Eat real whole foods. You know, fruits, vegetables, whole grains, nuts and seeds, locally raised meat, poultry, and fish or plant-based protein.

Eat less processed foods, sugary treats, fried foods. The keyword is less. I don’t want to be redundant, but balance.

Drink more green tea and hot lemon water.

Exercise regularly.

Meditate, stretch, practice yoga.

If yoga isn’t your thing, take part in a sport or activity you like and move that body!

Engage in activities that bring you happiness. It could be listening to your favourite music, painting, singing, dancing, going for car rides, being in nature, laughing with your friends.

Pray. Talk to God or the universe or yourself about what’s going on in your life and ask for help when you need it.

Make time for what makes you happy, be good to your body, take care of your mind, learn to listen to yourself and practice balance.

I hope that this is helpful to you. May you find happiness.