How I Used My Emotions to Help Myself Save Money
By: Sadie Lee
Tags: Money, Personal Finance, Financial Planning, Saving, Saving Money

I never realized that all the t-shirts, cars, and jewelry meant something to me. Jewelry meant that I was wealthy and feminine. Beachy t-shirts meant I was probably heading towards a beach vacation soon. My car represented my freedom. Every time I bought something, I was trying to confirm a vision of myself. I was wanted to buy myself into becoming a different, more adventurous person.

All my purchases were emotional. This is normal, as we are emotional beings with money! We buy space, love, happiness, or purchase away stress and boredom. Money is a tool of power that can control our mood states to a degree. Getting a handle on my saving habits didn’t mean I stopped having emotions and finances mix; it meant I redirected my emotions towards saving.

Feeling Impulsive? Don’t start saving too soon.

With new information, I was prepared to jump into saving right away! Saving money is a lot like dieting. I jumped into a few spending ‘diets’ and tried to sell my second-hand clothes too soon. I needed to understand why I was buying and why I was saving first. When I figured that out, I was actually a successful saver and stopped shopping for an entire year. I had to feel excited about spending. I didn’t want to feel like I was being punished into saving, that I was being forced to save, or that I was putting off happiness until tomorrow. My mindset needed to shift first. The choice to save should be built out of excitement for the future, a feeling of comfort and cushion, and be an educated choice. If it feels impulsive or punishing to yourself, don’t do it just yet!

Feeling Stressed? Look into Minimalism.

Minimalism and the aesthetic is beautiful and calming. The white simplicity I find to be the most relaxing. I need a laptop, my iPhone, my charge cords, and that’s about it. What makes me happy is walking in nature with friends, not half used clutter. I had clusters of perfumes clouding my tables, eleven bottles of lotions and shampoo, my dozens of tubes of lipsticks, and not only was that not the aesthetic that I found calming, but it was also costing me money. I realize how much care, space, and time things took up in my life, and my purchasing incentive started to drift away.

Feeling Guilt? Be Mindful of Your Reality.

I felt guilty for shopping. I felt guilty about spending. I sometimes would buy clothes to give the appearance of how beautiful I looked or how my new outfit made me feel like I had money. Taking the steps towards saving means less guilt. One of my friends insists on paying into her retirement before she pays off her credit card debt. Another friend complained she didn’t have the money for anything and yet bought a $6,000 home treadmill and still online shops. Both of these friends are letting impulse, guilt, and fear drive their purchases. I refuse all in-app purchases, monthly subscriptions and disallow myself mall trips. I stopped feeling rich and guilty. Rich is not a feeling. It’s a reality. Buying your way out of money stress is oxymoronic.

Feeling Hopeful? Visualize what saving will look and feel like.

Pexels: Cotton Bro

I realized I’m a dreamer. Whenever I put on a new Target bikini, I imagine I am on the beach and rolling in the sand with my boyfriend. When I buy a summer top, I imagine I am at the Fair Grounds. My mind conjures up excitement and adventures for my outfits. The reality is, I can attend these events without a new top, and I can probably afford them better too. I sort of believe in manifestations, or positive psychology at least. I have replaced fast fashion fantasies with the visions of my future with savings. I think about my beautiful view from my luxury house when I retire off my hefty retirement savings! My other financial dream is a new Buick Encore with heated leather seats. It’s also a little condo to call my own, renovate, and resell. Now when I touch that new Target sweater, I ask myself, “Is this as awesome of a purchase as that new car is going to be?”

Feeling Lonely? Enlist a Friend.

Saving does not have to be a non-social activity! I usually make some hot chocolate in a thermos instead of buying a coffee out; then I invite a friend on a walk with me. We usually stroll and talk for hours. There is always a cute dog or guy that we can comment on. The experience is relaxing and completely free. It’s one of my favorite thing to do with my friends. I realized that I was using shopping or brunch as a way to connect with people. I tried to talk myself out of saving, thinking it would impact my social life. I realized my friends just wanted to see me, expensive outings or not.

Feeling Lonely or Bored? Change How You Spend.

Sky diving in Moab for my graduation? Worth the $$. Paragliding in Europe with my gal pals? Worth the $$. Going shopping alone and blowing $400 dollars? Not worth it. I was shopping from boredom, anxiety, low self-esteem, and high television consumption. Honestly, I shopped in every mood. I was sucked into those purchases by an attractive salesperson, an image, or the idea/vibes of stores. I realized that buying events and time with others was worth it; stuff almost never is. I replaced boredom by adding friends into my activities, not spending.

Feeling Nostalgia? Replace spending with other things.

Understanding my spending habits was an important piece of my money management. Instead of a smoothie at Jamba Juice, I made it at home. This way, I satiated the craving and saved. Instead of shopping on the weekend, I went hiking; it fulfilled the same purpose of getting out and having fun. I used these little tricks to keep my brain happy and didn’t cause too much of a disruption to my schedule and patterns. It was through the simple habits and mental/emotional shift I was saving so much more money for the long haul.

Final Thoughts

Embarking on a saving journey is not as hard as I once thought. Most of my activities revolve around fun and free things with friends these days. The saving vs. spending lifestyle is pretty similar. I don’t have an instant way to boost my moods like a Target Binge, or Starbucks splurge would remedy. But the opposite of this is I am more forward-thinking and peaceful in my financial choices. It was absolutely worth it. Much easier than I thought too.

Cushioning my retirement and paying for 3/4 of my Master’s degree? Worth it. All the candles and sweaters I might have bought instead would have ended up in the bottom of my clothes hamper and trash bin one day anyway. My next five years are likely filled with full emergency funds, a new car, and that downpayment. An experience only saving money can buy!

This article is for informational purposes only. It should not be considered Financial or Legal Advice. Not all information will be accurate. Consult a financial professional before making any major financial decisions.