𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐈 𝐰𝐨𝐤𝐞 𝐮𝐩 𝐚𝐭 𝟔 𝐚𝐦 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐥𝐞𝐞𝐩, 𝐍𝐎 𝐂𝐎𝐅𝐅𝐄𝐄, 𝐚𝐧 𝐞𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐞, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐦𝐲 𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐚 completed 𝐓𝐞𝐝𝐱 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧…😎
By: Maker Moh
Tags: Storytelling, Tedx, Public Speaking, Growth

I had low sleep, little breaks during this day, and a deep passion lit inside (an inner 🔥 let’s say)

It’s midnight. I just finished writing up a Tedxtalk for Carleton University.

This was the first time I had ever applied for a TEDx talk, and an ENORMOUS part of me came alive with doubt, avoidance, and hopelessness.

I literally could not move from my friend’s couch.

Who I strategically planned to be around for moral support and content creation guidance.

Because I knew this was way out of my comfort zone.

Why do you ask?

Well, a part of me thought it was hopeless because I barely felt I had any time to close off the application.

And because of back-to-back doubtful questions…

Who am I to share a message with a larger audience? What makes me qualified? Why should I believe so much in myself…

Yup…the same good old imposter syndrome.

So here it was. CRUNCH TIME (no pressure Moh! Let’s gooo!)

For me, I had 2.5 hours left to draft written answers, record a 60-second video, and make sure everything flowed.

The whole activity could have taken 1–1.5 hours, however, it certainly did not feel as easy as that.

It was roughly 8 pm, and I had a check-in call scheduled with one of my most insightful friends, Ahmad Jabbir.

We were planning a check-in to go over our TedxTalks and our content creation for the event.

For me, I felt startingly reluctant to show up to our planned meeting, passively angry with myself that I had taken up the opportunity last minute without having more time available on my hand, and the creative space to breathe a bit more.

I mean I had taken up the call to draft a message, an application, and work after hours on my Tedx application in a matter of TWO DAYS!!!

I felt the pressure was on me.

And frankly, I said yes because I always love to take on a challenge, even when I do not feel ready 😓.

How much does this make sense so far to YOU?

How well can you relate to this feeling of imposter syndrome, lack of significance, and doubt?

Just in case, 𝐈 𝐅𝐄𝐄𝐋 𝐘𝐎𝐔. All the emotions and the thoughts.

Yet, after showing up to that meeting and an hour of chatting with Ahmad and my other dear friend, Amir (my friend whose place I was over), there came an insight.

I was extremely terrified of applying.

I was terrified it would not be perfect or even remotely a strong application.

So, my body wanted to shut down, I felt sluggish, sleepy, and did not want to move.

And that’s when my friends mentioned,

“Mohsen I think you’re wanting it to be perfect…”

Well yeah…It was the first step for me and I wanted to make it count big!

𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐈 𝐠𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐢𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐚𝐥𝐥, 𝐲𝐞𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐦𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭, 𝐈 𝐟𝐞𝐥𝐭 𝐧𝐨 𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐰𝐚𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐞𝐧𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡.

After that realization and acknowledgement of my fears…

My energy started to shift, my mindset started adjusting to a more go-getter mindset, and I finally made the decisive decision to move forward. ✅

𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐝𝐢𝐝 𝐈 𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐟𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐠𝐲 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐛𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐬𝐤? 𝐋𝐞𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐧! ✍🏼

I chose to be vulnerable in front of my close friends and show up, even though I felt defeated.

I asked my friends for guidance and reflections (and I REALLY opened myself to listen to them)!

(Knowing that their guidance would support me further and that it was based out of brotherhood).

I experienced a realization, an insight, and actually listened openly (”that I was afraid”).

I moved. I got up from the couch. Stood behind my computer for a few minutes.

And finally, I surrendered and trusted the momentum that built up from me experiencing the energy shift of confidence.

𝐒𝐮𝐝𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐩𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐞𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐚𝐧𝐱𝐢𝐞𝐭𝐲 𝐦𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐈 𝐦𝐚𝐝𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐫 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐟𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞.

I tallied all the steps I had already taken before that call and counted my wins!

I contacted previous Carleton Tedx speakers to get more insights.

I sent out an email and post to the Carleton Tedx team asking for clarifying questions to make my application more concise

I asked over 10+ of my friends/family what topics have resonated with them before that I brought forth when I’m around them.

Overall, I took extensive action in that short period, yet there was another important realization.

𝐈 𝐤𝐞𝐩𝐭 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐎𝐔𝐓𝐒𝐈𝐃𝐄 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐟𝐮𝐥 𝐦𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞.

And not inside. Believing that there’s nothing within me that is insightful to share at that moment.

I was scared to embrace it at first.

The fact was, I already had all the ability and creative outlet within me.

As in, “I create 100% of my reality from within.”

Something that my mentor, Kevin, helps me remember in many moments.

…And so I finished that meeting with my friends.

Wrapped up the call, and then rose up!

I drafted a deeper message.

I created a STORY about a 26-year-old struggling to embrace his emotions for decades and feeling completely lost in the world, no matter where he went.

I added a theme that highlighted our emotions serve us, generate great insight, and are there to be experienced FOR US, rather than TO US.

The message started becoming more clear and the steps started formulating.

My little teaser trailer!

How interested are you in hearing this message based on my opener?

𝐋𝐞𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧! 𝐈’𝐦 𝐚 𝐛𝐢𝐠 𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭, 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐲, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 (𝐚𝐬 𝐈’𝐝 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬!)

For now, I’m saving the rest for my second post about the message in my Tedx Application!

And also,

I intend to apply to TWO more TedxTalk applications for the end of January.

Why?

Because I have a powerful message, as we all do.

And I’m no longer afraid to embrace it, create it, work on it, and share it out.

To empower, inspire, and connect with my fellow beings on this planet.

I was that alone Zac for many years.

Someone else can be supported by my experience and transition this life experience much more smoothly.

So why wait for more inspiration first or until I feel fully qualified (when there’s no imposter syndrome present)?

That will take decades. Decades!

And there is no such thing as no doubt ever.

That sense of doubt will always exist in moments of growth and expansion.

So…I declare loudly into the world!

I choose to LEAP this learning curve instead now…with confidence, inner trust, and faith in my purpose.

As always,

Thank you for reading.

With Gratitude, Confidence, and Love.

Maker Moh Signing Out!

Let’s SOAR and SHINE together.

P.S: If you enjoyed my story and are open to more personal content, check out my Instagram ! (Click on the exclamation)

P.P.S: Thank you to TEDxCarletonUniversity (@tedxcarletonuniversity) for the opportunity to apply!