The Seven Personal Skills to Develop Before Moving Abroad!
By: Margot Benouard
Tags: Challenge, Moving Abroad, Living Overseas, Personal Development, Self Improvement

An here it begins…

If you had told me when I was a child that one day I will live overseas as a permanent resident, I would not have believed you. I cannot recall what I wanted to do with my life when I grow up but definitely, living abroad was not part of my plan. I think it even came unexpectedly as a moment of enlightenment — I would like to try to do something more challenging and continue my education abroad. My chosen destination was Germany for a simple reason — this country offered a wide variety of studying programs and there are plenty of famous research centers to choose from. In addition to that, it was also the easiest choice for me because of the language and cultural specificity that perfectly complied with my personality.

After a couple of months of non-stop searching and email “ping-ponging” I have found a program that would leave me satisfied with my choice. As soon as I graduated from university and got my master’s diploma, I confidently headed to the university’s exit marching towards my enlightened future and unique opportunity to pursue a Doctoral degree abroad! It was like a scene from a movie; you are in front of two massive doors, the next moment they open and you are moving into a room full of light… I do not exactly remember whether there was a choir of angels singing… but that is how it felt!

First thing’s first…

Needless to mention here, I had big expectations. And here comes the first rule: do not have any expectations when you are starting a new project and especially when moving abroad. The higher the expectations you have and the bigger the difference between your expectations and the reality, the higher the disappointment you will have. You can also add on top of that the different play rules you definitely need to follow, people’s perceptions, their level of education and world vision, cultural differences, language barriers, and all that jazz related to cliches that you might have not been aware of (and of course, nobody here prevented you, right?). I fully understand why so many people make a decision to come back after a trial, and I do not blame them for that!

Take it or leave it…

When it comes to moving out, you also have to be to some extent an adventurous person. Living overseas is a risk and taking them and feeling comfortable at the same time is not everyone’s cup of tea. It is definitely a get-out-of-your-comfort-zone opportunity and you should also appreciate this. It is like taking a cold shower after doing your daily workout. I love it! You might hate it, but you can still develop a feeling of being okay to do that for a health benefit! Psssst! Do not tell anyone: if you have never experienced moving abroad, you will get used to the new environment and might even enjoy it once you are settled down.

Do I actually need all these?

And here we are coming to the next important point: why you are here. Is it for studying, pursuing your dream career, or maybe you were looking for life experiences and were hungry for a change? It is your dream that should work for you as a lighthouse beacon light, enlightening your way through, full of uncertainties and issues. Trust me, you have to be prepared. Be persistent; it will make your dream undestroyable!

Passions, passions, and again… Passions!

We are all different and our personalities formed not only under rules imposed by cultural constraints but also under criteria that are going far beyond that. The latter includes the family environments we have risen in, our personal experience, gender, age, location, and a language that also shapes the way we think. The list may continue…

Globalization also plays a key role in diminishing the borders between cultures that led to a big cultural mix. No matter what, you should respect the fact that we are all different. That rule always keeps me on the safe side and spares me from having conflicts, in both my personal and professional life. It also taught me to stop judging quickly and appreciate the opinions that differ from mine. Points of you other than yours can help you to have a look at the problem from another perspective and, who knows might even help you find an answer to some of your questions more quickly.

Appreciate the difference…

Being flexible is another skill I have improved while traveling around. Weather, food, and local rules are all different. Appreciate the fact that all these won’t be like at home, and be prepared for that as well.

Who can be a better friend for me than myself?

You need to be comfortable to be in your own company… at least in the beginning, till you find new friends. The harsh reality is that no one is actually waiting for you there. The only person you can rely on is yourself. That is why it is important to be (or at least be okay for some time) on your own and enjoy your own company.

“see the world through other people’s eyes,”― Brian Grazer

Last but not least: it is inner personal curiosity. It is always interesting to learn more about the history of the country you plan to live in, boost your language skills, and learn more about another culture and customs, isn’t it? The more you learn about the country and its rules, the more you get the feel for another culture and become confident living there.

I would like to finalize this story with one interesting example from my past experience. I needed to present the preliminary results of my research in front of a scientific audience, a majority of which were Germans. Despite my nervousness and anxiety that occurred from the previous sleepless nights from working on the presentation (speaking of time-management, right?), I delivered it well. But when I was done with that, there was one surprise waiting for me. I expected hand claps or at least silence in the worst case… but, instead, I received a crushing air noise, which was triggered by about 70 people’s knuckles knocking on the tables. That was one of the cultural loud-shocking lessons I needed to learn that evening…

In the end, it is your personal experience. It is always nice to learn something new. Do not be stressed if you decide to move abroad. It is all good. Just enjoy your journey and you will never know what one opportunity can lead to…. but this a topic for another story…