5 Inconvenient Things I’ve Had To Adjust Ever Since I Became A Christian
By: Ryan Fan
Tags: Spirituality, Self, Religion, Humor, Christianity

1. I’ve had to try to love people I don’t like

Love God and love your neighbor as the two greatest commandments of Christianity sounds great in theory, but is actually really hard in practice. The day-to-day complications and nuances lead inevitably to conflict. We work with difficult people and have to interact with people we fundamentally disagree with or simply don’t get along with.

The other week, I had a co-worker tell me straight to my face that he didn’t like me, and then proceed the rest of my night criticizing my beliefs and coming at me for my life choices. I didn’t want to spend my whole night listening to unrelenting, accusatory attacks on my character. A younger version of me would have been fine with me and told him to go fuck yourself.

But since I became a Christian a year and a half ago, reacting like that is something you have to refrain from. The mark of how good of a Christian you are is how much you love your enemy. If I can’t do better in doing that, than I might as well have never changed to begin with. When we parted ways, I hugged my co-worker and wished him the best of luck, checking in on him frequently.

2. I’ve had a lot less free time and time to do work

I have had to occupy so much of my time going to church service, listening to sermons, and reading Scripture that unfortunately, I have less time to write, less time to lesson plan for my classes, and less time to hang out with my friends. One could say that being a Christian is a massive time investment that is a lot of work, and we’re better off not being Christians to save everyone’s time.

However, for me at least, it’s been worth it. Rather, being a Christian has aligned my spirituality with my work, and that has simply made everything so much more meaningful. Being a Christian gives freedom, and now I feel much more freedom to be open and vulnerable with friends, to explore new topics in writing and be more open with my thoughts, to prioritize in lesson planning. I may have less time, but the time I do spend on work, play, and rest have much more meaning knowing this is God’s plan for me, instead of rejecting it.

3. Looking at my sin has plummeted my self-worth

Every day as a Christian involves reminding yourself of what a piece of shit you are, and looking at your own sin usually doesn’t feel good. You start to realize how many terrible things you do and don’t live up to the Jesus standard on a daily basis. Silent confession is a time in church to admit when you’ve done wrong in church, but that’s something, as a Christian, I’ve done a lot more of on a daily basis. Self-worth and self-confidence is something that goes out the window once I became a Christian, but having a God that saves and forgives has allowed me to re-find that in Christ.

Because I’m such a terrible person and can’t ever live up to Jesus’s standard, so I can’t judge. I’ll devote my life to try and never lose hope because Jesus never did.

4. I’ve had to bend over backwards helping people who need it.

I had a friend and co-worker need a ride to back to her place, occasionally, and the issue was that I had to drive 30 minutes in the opposite direction of where I lived. I drove her from Baltimore City north into Baltimore County, and when I was younger and not a Christian, I may have asked for compensation or a favor in return. But I have not. I’ve learned that the Christian way is to, after doing something good, disappear and never mention it again.

5. I have to answer all my friends’ bad experiences and negative views towards Christianity.

One thing my friends with bad experiences and antagonistic views toward Christianity don’t understand is that I’m not a stand-in for their bad experiences with the Church. These friends’ views are valid, but placing me as a symbol for every bad thing they’ve experienced in a church is awfully inconvenient to manage. But I know that everyone has their own unique walk with their faith. I can’t change their minds, but I can live in a way that makes my friends ask “there’s something about you, and I can’t put my finger on it,” to draw them to Christ instead of preaching at them.

In all of this, I’m much more thankful to have these inconveniences than not. Faith needs trials. Faith needs doubt and hard circumstances to refine. James 1:2–4 states the following verses:’

“Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.”

So what if I have to answer for my friends’ bad experience with Christianity? So what if I have to bend over backward trying to love my neighbor and help my friends and students? So what if I don’t think highly of myself anymore? So what if I’ve had to love people that have been hard to like?

I have something better and something more that I have been searching for for a long time that is Christ’s love and sacrifice for me. I go back and forth. I have a lover’s quarrel with God, and I wouldn’t have it any other way than to fulfill God’s plan and prophecy for me.