30 Things I Love About Evie
By: Clemens Wan
Tags: List Of 30, Parenting, Dads, Love

Random Observation/Comment #592: Sleep is that old friend you took for granted, but now realize is all you really need. I love you, sleep.

Why this list?

Being a new father is amazing. I swell with pride and interest with every monthly milestone met, even though I know it’s all going far too quickly. In line with reflecting on my thankfulness this holiday season, I wanted to share these generic baby things that give me the warm fuzzies.

Things She Does

Her face when she’s happy and recognizes my face When she truffles for the pacifier When she stretches her arms and legs on the changing pad When she gets out of her swaddle because she’s super strong When she she grabs onto my finger and my shirt and stares deeply into my soul When she giggles because we made funny noises When she gets in the talking mood Her in-place running kicks (usually to my nether regions) Her face when she’s about to poop When she plays around with her pacifier like a gunslinger with their pistol

Things I Feel

Meaning — Being a first time father is overwhelmingly rewarding. I feel like my heart has grown in size to fit in the extra joy she brings. Whole-ness — A lot of pieces came together from my 20s with all that freedom and soul-searching. I can clearly see a lot of goals and priorities before me. While it’s a rocky and uncertain path, it’s adventure we chose and embark on together Happiness — When she’s an angel and lights up all of our days. I see such joy she brings to all those around her Appreciation — To my wife for all she does and puts up with Gratitude — To my parents and all parents for what they do for their children Responsibility — A burden to provide for the family financially and emotionally while still having a resemblance of a social life. Adulting is hard. Frustration — When I have no idea why she’s crying and 3 other things are happening Fear — I hope the world is kind to her and doesn’t chew her up and spit her out Anxiety/Pressure — I hope we do okay as parents. Parents have a thankless job. Tired — Sometimes you remember the journey and all the other ways you used to spend your time. It’s then you realize that your time is now shared and no longer just your own.

Things She Makes Me Want To Be

Be Present — At all costs, just be there for my family and enjoy the fleeting moments together Be a Better Samaritan — A greater good of making this place a better place for her future Be a Cool Dad — I remember how I looked up to my Dad for just being a Dad, but there’s also some cool stories I hung on to. I understand I don’t need to be the most interesting person in the world, but it’s good to be a little interesting Be Healthy — I want to see her all grown up and walk her down the aisle Be Kind — Kindness is contagious and I’d like to act how I’d want my child to act Be Strong — Not just physically to carry her heavy car seat around, but also the anchor for the family and a problem solver where needed Be Patient — Life is a journey and life lessons take time to learn. I want to share everything with her, but it can’t happen tomorrow. Time to write a curriculum. Be Consistent — It’s important to be clear about my parental intentions and my fatherly image. I think I’m going to be the tech junkie softie that defers to Mom for all major decisions. Be Careful — I’ve always lived on the edge and considered the consequences after the event. I’ve slowly set into doing less spontaneous trips and definitely prioritizing her health and the family’s best interest Be Silly — I believe this is the most important part to never growing up and leads to the longer term enjoyment of the journey. While there’s a lot of pressure, I can’t take life too seriously.

~See Lemons Love Evie