Hanging by a (Narrative) Thread: Friendship in Post-Truth ‘Murica
By: Joe Dusbabek
Tags: Politics, Technology, Psychology, Self, Friendship

The dirty secret of human life on this planet is that no one really knows anything. Sure, we have plenty of scientists, philosophers, politicians, and executives who will scream that they do, to anyone that will listen (and sell you a book while they’re at it). But at the end of the day, even the Scientific Method and the mathematics that underpin most of our understanding of our universe and world are based on models— which are quite different from facts. These are tools we have invented to help us understand our broader world, and while our collective knowledge has certainly held true thus far, but that doesn’t mean it always will.

This isn’t an ontological question; more of an existential one. The more we learn, particularly in fields such as Physics and Psychology, the more reason we have to believe that we construct our perception of the world; it is not there inherently. As human beings, we are creatures of meaning. We write songs, conduct research, go looking for answers in endless space filled with billions of galaxies. It’s at the very core of what we are.

We are, surely, desperate for answers.

Filter bubbles provide this meaning for a great many people today. Whether you value the latest political goings-on, or Cardi B’s most recent twerking video, or the latest technological developments, you will inevitably run up against the classic human problem: how are you spending your limited time? If you spend the majority of your time in a given community, that will become what you know, to the degree that members of most online subcultures share largely predictable traits. If you’re into the Silicon Valley tech scene, I can guess fairly accurately what you’re into. Ditto if you’re a Republican. Or an artist. I can likely guess much about who you admire, what side of any given social issue you are on, and what you spend your money on. You are, truly, what you eat, and the subcultures you spend time with end up forming you.

This isn’t necessarily a “bad” thing. It can be enlightening to encounter new perspectives, to share pieces of yourself and your life with others who identify and understand you. There is tremendous comfort in this. Forgive me for engaging in so many generalities, but humans are also tribal animals. We need to feel understood, to belong as a unique member of a larger group, to use our gifts in service of a transpersonal whole. The only difference between now and most of human history is that we have since abandoned rock-throwing and cave-painting, and have taken our tribes online, to spread them across the world like a healing salve for the wounded. Or perhaps more like a virus, for the vulnerable.

Many of these groups and communities rely on an enemy to keep the whole charade going: Christians vs. the War on Christmas, liberals vs. conservatives, religion vs. science…and in each of them, an overwhelming desire to simplify and devalue the human beings on the “other team.” It’s a tribalism based on mass categorization, on preexisting prejudices, on reducing your fellow (hu)man to a series of worst-case scenarios they may inflict on you. This gets you motivated to fight, to battle, to both declare war and conveniently fund it for someone else who can benefit from the conflict regardless of who “wins.” You’re either in, or you’re out — and most will do anything to stay in the community of their choice. Including what they think, what actions they take, and the reasons; in summary, who they are. The entire world in 2019 seems a litany of competing puppet shows, with innumerable participants clamoring to tie strings to their own limbs and be moved at will.