The Wisdom of the Years: Sex-ED Revised
By: Sophia Brigitte
Tags: Education, Beauty, Relationships, Sexuality, Body Image

Credit: Becks Falk https://becksfalkphotography.com

I remember so vividly walking into class midway through fifth grade, more confused than ever, as my leg and armpit hair had exploded that year. Puberty had begun. I felt like a fish out of water.

We were starting sex-ed.

I was terrified.

My mom had read a book about puberty the year before in hopes of preparing both my brother and I for what was to come.

My class was put in separate rooms, the girls in one and the boys in another. I remember the teacher put a chart up on the board and starting identifying parts. I knew most of them, not to brag. I also remember the smartest girl in my class asking where the uterus was; I pointed proudly in between the fallopian tubes.

The week went by with awkward talks of mechanics. It was mostly a blur. I wasn’t quite sure what it all meant.

“This goes here, this goes here, be safe”, stuttered my teacher.

I now reflect on all the things I experienced in the real world throughout my teens and now my twenties. There are so many things I wish were explained to me in that class.

Not just the mechanics.

But most importantly, I wish I was taught the power of my body, the joy of bleeding, and how to feel myself. Not feel myself in a weird way, but read it, and connect to it. Understanding it’s boldness in a world where we’re taught everyone else knows us better.

I spend much of my teenage years hiding my bleeding. Painfully slipping away to change my tampon, and with the words of my mother echoing in my head;

That’s just how it is.

I’m here to tell you, it doesn’t have to be this way.

If I had to re-teach sex-ed to myself these are some of the things that I would have to say.

We are connected to the moons, and men are connected to the sun. We flow on a specific pattern. Our hormones fluctuate throughout the month. Just like the moon prepares for rebirth, we are magic too.

Men are like the sun, their hormones wake them up, and put them to sleep.

The first half of our cycle can make us feel like we have unlimited social energy. Like we want to see, be, and interact with everyone. Our biggest hormone at play is estrogen.

Round two, or the second half of our cycles are magical. Spending time with yourself can make you feel at peace.

Plus this half makes us eat like we’re having a baby, because the hormone at play is progesterone. And that’s okay.

Bleeding is amazing. We didn’t create another life this month, and our bodies will try again next month.

This cycle each month can give us the power of reflection, and I’d say that’s one of the most powerful gifts. That this is nothing to hide.

I also wish someone had told me that I am worth it. I can love myself more than a boy, and that’s okay.

It’s more than okay.

Self love.

This could have been one of the strongest parts of this class. Now, I get this isn’t in traditional curriculum, but think about the larger aspect of teaching girls, that their dreams are accomplishable.

I am now 25 and I wish someone at that age had believed in my dreams and told me I was allowed to believe in myself and to trust my body.

That I was allowed to be choosey about who I let inside of me. That I had to believe I was worth it before anyone else would also respect that too.

Where was the side of sex-ed of self acceptance and trusting your gut?

Where was the part of sex-ed that empowered women?

Why can’t we teach anatomy and the emotional impacts of growing up? We are worth it.

We are better than this.