What Christmas Means To Me As A Former Believer
By: Benny Lim
Tags: Christianity, Christmas, Faith, Life, Religion

That’s how Christmas has always been depicted to people living in Asia who have never had the chance to experience Christmas in countries where it snows and you can actually do all of that.

Growing up, my family never celebrated Christmas because we didn’t believe in it. We didn’t believe it actually celebrated the birth of Jesus because Jesus wasn’t born in December and my dad always called the tradition of Santa Claus with the presents under the Christmas tree as pagan believes. How does that correlate with what the celebration is supposed to be about?

So, I never celebrated Christmas as a young kid.

Not once.

Of course, living in South East Asia where December is usually the month of monsoon when we get thunderstorms and flash floods on an almost daily basis instead of snow, the mood for Christmas wasn’t always there.

But I longed to experience what I’ve always seen on TV.

Especially after watching Home Alone and the character of Macaulay Culkin (Kevin McCallister) was shown having some nice hot milk and cookies the night before he pulled off one of the most memorable scenes in movie history by defending his home from a bunch of burglars.

However, not only was I in a country where I could never experience snow, but I was also in a family that would never celebrate Christmas.

Fast forward a few decades later and here I am, getting ready to celebrate Christmas with my family for the 6th year and this time, not as a Christian but someone who wants to just enjoy the festive season with his family and loved ones.

So, how does one celebrate a Christian celebration without being one?

Easy, you just celebrate it as a family gathering.

For the second year in a row, my house has a Christmas tree up, nicely decorated and with presents underneath it, all wrapped up and just waiting to be opened up by its rightful owner.

Christmas for me is now much more meaningful as a former believer.

Mainly because I celebrate it with my family for reasons that I believe is much more personal and meaningful to me.

I celebrate it not because of Santa or presents (although we do get presents for each other just for the fun of it) but because of the occasion of getting together and being with one another. I celebrate it not because it celebrates the birth of Jesus but because of the true meaning of what Christmas is supposed to be about — celebrating love.

I love how people can suddenly put aside their differences during Christmas because it’s the time for love and forgiveness.

Why can’t that be celebrated every single day?

But because it’s so hard for people to do that on a daily basis, they do it during Christmas and I’ll take that.

Christmas for me is the time when people can just come together despite their differences. That in itself is magical and it’s the season for magic and happiness.

I’ve heard and seen stories of families getting back together because of Christmas, how some parents who have not seen their children for years, finally got the chance during Christmas. That for me is worth celebrating. And if Christmas brings about that, I’m celebrating it.

Back then, I couldn’t celebrate it because my parents taught us that it was a pagan celebration and that God didn’t like it.

For some reason, they knew what God was thinking.

I don’t blame them, I really don’t. They were just teaching their children about something that they too had very limited understanding about.

Which for me is what a lot of religious people have — limited understanding of their own religion.

They understand what they WANT to understand.

And they can’t take or accept the opinion of others, especially if it differs from their own.

So, for my parents (especially my dad) who were like that, they were very adamant that Christmas could not be celebrated. Their take was that, just because everyone does it, does not make it right. They were so sure of what they believed in, they were so sure that they were in the right, that they thought we were the ‘chosen’ ones.

And we had to uphold the ‘truth’ no matter what.

Well, for me, the truth is really unknown because our understanding is very limited and there are just so much out there that we don’t know about. All I know is that everyone has the right to believe in what they want to believe and not force their beliefs on others.

That’s why I can celebrate anything I want now as long as I’m doing it for reasons that are right for me.

Being able to finally celebrate something that I’ve always wanted to celebrate since I was young, even if it’s for different reasons now, is something that I’m extremely grateful for.

I still don’t believe in the reasons for Christmas, I don’t. I still find it strange that the birth of Christ is celebrated with a tree, presents and a fat man in a red jumper suit delivering presents all over the world in a sledge pulled by flying reindeers.

It’s always been silly for me and it will continue to be silly for me.

But that doesn’t mean that those who DO believe in it are wrong for doing so. It’s what gives them hope and as long as it doesn’t hurt others, that’s fine.

Christmas has always been a special celebration for Christians.

It’s ironic how it’s become special for me, now that I’m no longer a believer. But it is and I can now say it’s a meaningful celebration for me and my family.

Merry Christmas, everyone.