Why Couldn’t I Start Publishing on Medium?
By: Kate Melnik
Tags: Blogging Tips, Productivity, Writing, Getting Things Done, Writers Block

Why Couldn’t I Start Publishing on Medium?

And how to overcome what stops us from accomplishing the goals we desire Kate Melnik Aug 27·5 min read

Doodle by Pablo Stanley from Blush

I have a dozen of texts I intended to write and publish on Medium, but I never finished or posted one. I always wanted to create engaging content to share interesting ideas, provide information someone would find helpful, and meet like-minded people here. Besides, I had no reason considerable enough to prevent me from starting a blog! The realization that I don’t have any valuable excuse forced me to sit down and analyze what could prevent me from finishing a text about an inspiring book I’ve just read and hitting that Publish button.

Procrastination is not the only one to blame

I reflected on how “This topic is so urgent/argumentative/inspiring I desperately need to write about it!” turns into an unfinished draft. Sadly, my intention to complete any text vanished as I started thinking that statements I am about to make might not be 100% correct or true for everyone. I started doubting my thoughts and even exploring Google Scholar’s articles to check if my assumptions about a subject were correct! I bet not every writer does this; most don’t care if their opinions are scientifically submitted. It is the right course of action, but not to me as I was scared to be judged. I imagined how writing, for example, about innovations, would lead to comments like “How old are you and what education do you have to say anything about the topic?” Fear was powerful enough to dramatically decrease my motivation to research and write about anything, no matter how interesting.

Such change in the mood inevitably led to the lack of self-regulation and countless minutes of procrastination on Instagram. I am usually fine with discipline and capable of performing undesirable tasks, but when it comes to this particular “write the text” one, I can’t help myself! After closing Instagram and re-opening Medium, I tended to find 123456 phrases that should have been written in other words and even more reasons why a paragraph needs re-structurization. I ended up stuck at editing, re-writing, paraphrasing statements, the correctness of which was doubting to me, combined with dopamine-shots of distractions and final decision that I’m incapable of creating any piece of content.

Based on that reflection, I found out that I am scared to be wrong in my assumptions, my self-discipline is weak, and I cannot stop polishing a paragraph to make it “perfect.” Here my self-analysis turned into nerdy research, and I found some interesting reasons why my issues could occur and how to overcome them.

Fear of being wrong about something

Reasons to experience it: according to psychology, being scared of judgment about personal opinion has roots in childhood if a kid faced criticism or non-acceptance from parents. Furthermore, our basic need to be a part of a community stimulates the fear of rejection, forcing us to avoid risky situations. Wonderful how the ancient instincts are still capable of regulating our decisions, isn’t it?

How to overcome: starting from the inner dialogue is helpful! For instance, it is essential to stop criticizing and switch to a more supportive, friendly conversation with yourself. Then, perceiving possible judgemental statements as an opportunity to learn a subject deeper can encourage you to take risks and explore if it is exciting. Lastly, remembering that negative comments are rather about their authors’ insecurities is a profound way of avoiding unnecessary anxiety.

Self-discipline necessary to complete a task

Reasons to lack it: the absence of a clear and critically important goal is what frequently challenges discipline in the moments when motivation fades. When a person knows the why and understands that achieving it is necessary for life improvement, she can recall it when it becomes difficult to keep going. Also, an insufficient reward for finishing a tough task can destroy our willingness to complete it. James Olds and Peter Milner proved that our expectation of receiving a certain benefit makes us more efficient in getting it. Consequently, not knowing what exactly would be a bounty is unfavorable for our self-discipline.

How to develop: obvious from the reasons to lack self-discipline, a highly desirable or valuable reward combined with a clear goal are the tools to improve the ability to completing tasks. The profound practice is to imagine how amazing it would feel to finally post a story (relating to my case with unfinished posts) and think of an initial reason why a task is being performed. Besides, creating a ritual for setting the right mood and selecting the best external conditions for completing work is wonderful for turning self-discipline into a habit. I read hundreds of posts on Medium where writers described their “cup of coffee vital to start,” “preparation routine,” or “special playlist” as a crucial factor of success. Now I understand why.

Unnecessary perfectionism

Reasons to have it: various factors, such as unstable self-esteem, fear of failure or rejection, unrealistic expectations, and childhood traumas, stand behind that malicious trait. The drivers for perfectionism are living in an unsafe environment, having toxic people around, and experiencing anxiety about any choice you are about to make. The important point to consider is that fear of “underperforming” is a learned behavior, so it can be changed!

How to get rid of it: although “stop setting expectations” seems like a basic and most workable strategy, eliminating perfectionism primarily requires addressing the root issues. Self-analysis, such as writing about the experiences of failure or embarrassment, can help reveal why you developed that toxic trait. Next, switching the perspective to getting into the process instead of having a result-based viewpoint on any activity is a profound way to calm an inner perfectionist down. Besides, being present is necessary to embrace that external circumstances influence the final result and frequently cannot be changed.

Final thoughts

Doodle by Pablo Stanley from Blush

The perfectionism-related practices resonated with me the most. Indeed, this post is my attempt to enjoy the process of searching for information, reflecting on personal experience, and crafting a text about it rather than setting expectations about a post and trying to accomplish them.

If you are reading this story now, the strategies above helped me complete a piece and even publish it, so consider them workable!

I expected my first story here to be about anything but confessions of unnecessary perfectionism, fear of judgment, and other personal issues. But better done than perfect!

P.S. I would be happy if you share an opinion about this story in the comments or provide feedback about its quality based on Medium’s standards! 😊