Fat Acceptance Is Self-Acceptance
By: Christine Schoenwald
Tags: Self Acceptance, Fat Acceptance, Mental Health, Culture, Feminism

I’ve wasted a lot of time waiting until I was thin to go after the things I wanted. I didn’t have the self-confidence to put myself out there because I was fat. Was it an excuse? In some ways, yes, but I did experience roadblocks because of my weight.

I’m getting older, and I no longer have the luxury to wait until I’m a perfect weight to go after my goals.

We have to love ourselves all the time, which what acceptance is all about. If you’re fat, then fat-acceptance is self-acceptance, the same way every other kind of acceptance is.

Fat-acceptance doesn’t mean not growing, improving, or challenging one’s self.

Acceptance gives you a foundation that allows you to move past your emotional obstacles with less fear. Think of it this way, if you’re cutting an apple on an unstable cutting-board, you run the risk of hurting yourself with the knife. We need a stable starting point to take chances, put ourselves out there, and take actionable steps.

How can you change if you loathe who you are at the start or seek help if you don’t feel you are worth it? Without acceptance, there’s nothing to keep you going.

The opposite of fat-acceptance is internalizing cruelty or mistreatment because you feel it’s justified.

You can’t defend yourself from fat-shaming, discrimination, and abuse if you’re convinced you deserve it because of your body-size.

Being fat isn’t a crime — though I’m sure some see it that way. Fat people should be allowed to be happy and accept themselves for their successes and failures.

Fat-acceptance isn’t the same thing as body-positivity.

I like to think the body-positive movement began with good intentions. They wanted people to feel good about their bodies, even when those bodies weren’t perfect.

However, somewhere along the line, as the movement grew, the idea of body-positivity began to apply to only those whose bodies were acceptable fat, and not unruly fat.

You could be positive about your body if it were curvy, thick in the right places, or voluptuous, but if it was obviously fat, then body-positive was something for you to aspire to.

In her article, Leaving Body Positivity Behind for Fat Acceptance, writer Rachael Hope writes:

I disagree with the idea that loving your body is a goal that sets us up for failure. Loving your body doesn’t have to mean that you don’t think you have flaws or that you don’t have bad days. The same way that when you love another human being you don’t like them every moment of every day. I have days where I feel down on myself or dislike the way my body looks or feels. There are specific parts of my body I like less than others. But I still love my body. I love that it is my home. I love that it lets me physically connect with people. I love that it lets me feel touch and pleasure. Accepting your body is something to be proud of. For me, accepting it was part of falling in love. I don’t love my body because it’s the BEST body or because it’s a BETTER body than someone else’s. I love it because it is my body, and I love myself.

As fat people, we need to accept, care for, and love our bodies — it’s vital to our feelings of worth, self-esteem, and the quality of our lives. We need it as armor to fight our battles and help protect us against shame and humiliation.

When you accept your body, you can start to heal.

Fat-acceptance allows us to be honest with ourselves and helps us to see both our limitations and talents. Without fat-acceptance, you may shut something down like working out or applying for a job because you’re starting from a shaky spot.

When you accept your body, you can start to heal. No matter what size it is, how healthy it’s perceived to be, or how it serves you — you’re alive and that’s thanks to your body.

The next time someone tries to shame you for having both self-acceptance and fat-acceptance let them know that you’re not dependent on their approval, and that you don’t need their opinions about your relationship to your own body.