Here Is Exactly How You Can Deal With Boot-Licking Co-Workers Without Imitating Them
By: Angeline Tan
Tags: Jobs, Work, Careers, Life Lessons, Life

Here Is Exactly How You Can Deal With Boot-Licking Co-Workers Without Imitating Them

Tried-and-tested hacks to deal with office politics without resorting to obsequious flattery.

Remember the annoying co-worker who likes to hover around your manager/management to lavish over-the-top praises on them, whether these praises have valid grounds?

Tired of incompetent colleagues who seem to be getting promoted over other hardworking and able staff — simply because of the former hang around management like bees to honey?

Getting more frustrated when some colleagues refuse to do what’s beyond the minimum for teamwork projects but are the first to offer help to the C-level suite in your company?

Well, your sentiments are not uncommon.

I have been through such feelings myself in some of my previous job appointments.

Office politics and bootlicking are not modern-day phenomena. In fact, cases of bootlicking have been around for centuries, even during the imperial days when corrupt officials used to encircle the emperors of the past.

Even with the advances of modern-day technology, there are still personalities (such as those of bootlickers) who are not era-dependent.

Frustrating, isn’t it?

Indeed, and thus let us explore more about bootlicking and how to go about bootlicking colleagues below.

Distinguish ‘Personal Cataloguing’ From Bootlicking

Although it is generally accepted in the business community to be cataloging/packaging one’s career achievements in order to get promoted within a company, for example, bootlicking and curry-favoring, whatever term you call it, is an entirely different matter.

The distinction between ‘personal cataloging’ and bootlicking is that the former is based on truth (one’s achievements and real abilities), whereas the latter need not be based on truth.

Put it simply, ‘personal cataloging’ can be described as a process whereby one package, develops and sustains a reputation within one’s company or professional arena based on the achievements one has accomplished as well as on the abilities of each individual.

Bootlicking, on the other hand, can be described as insincere attempts by someone to flatter another that is not necessarily based on truth and sincerity. Bootlicking is usually carried out with an ulterior motive, such as a hope to get a favor from the flattered party.

Given that we have established the differences between ‘personal cataloging’ and ‘bootlicking’, what are you to do next in the face of bootlicking colleagues at the office?

Well, you might be tempted at first to follow in the footsteps of your obsequious colleagues to gain the favor of your boss.

That being said, the means cannot justify the ends.

The question you should ask yourself is:

Would I want to resort to such insincere tactics simply to win my boss’s favor or to get a promotion?

Well, perhaps you feel no qualms about such tactics after all.

In that case, your bootlicking colleagues might be less blameworthy as you think along their lines.

Call me a fool, but I would rather get into my bosses’ good books with actual and quantifiable results — and with a sincere emotional intelligence — than to flatter my way to the top.

Victory (by earning a promotion or getting a pay raise) would be sweeter if I have earned it the honest way.

If you agree with what I just said, I would like to share with you my tried-and-tested tips to motivate you to handle toxic co-workers. Even if you don’t agree, feel free to read on :)

Begin (Or Continue) With Your ‘Personal Cataloguing’

First and foremost, while you might not be a fan of bootlicking just to look shiny and gold, it is important to have a written catalog/record of all the things you have done in your job function, especially those tasks that you excelled in and were successful in accomplishing.

You might choose to document your professional work in hard or soft copy.

When I got fed up with some of the unhealthy work cultures in some of my previous job posts (Japan, etc.), I realized that taking action to consolidate all I have done for the company in question in measurable terms if possible. I personally preferred to document my work on a soft copy that can be saved easily on Google Drive or Dropbox (in case my computer crashes).

For instance, until the present moment, I like to regularly update my resume that I have (by God’s grace) achieved (in quantifiable terms if possible).

In this way, I always have an updated and accurate copy of my resume to show to future clients (when I am hustling for them).

Moreover, in ongoing negotiations with clients whom I have worked with for a while, I can refer to my updated resume and share with them what I have contributed so far to negotiate for better terms, such as a pay rise or a referral.

Similarly, you have the leeway to opt for the most suitable ‘personal cataloging’ way for your career.

Just make sure to have more than one copy of your ‘personal catalog’ as a back-up, especially if you have chosen (or decide to opt for) the hardcopy way.

PS: Think of ‘personal cataloging’ as the important process of ‘packaging’ one’s professional self to remain competitive in the professional landscape as well as to have evidence-based reasons for better work terms.

Give Sincere Praise To Your Supervisors

Additionally, contrary to the insincere flattery of your bootlicking colleagues, you might choose to adopt the method of being generous in giving praise to your supervisors — provided you are sincere and the grounds for such praise are well-founded.

Take, as an illustration, a scenario in which your manager has managed to lead your team to achieve or even your quarterly targets. You can then complement your manager and congratulate him/her in that specific situation, giving him/her the reason for your praise.

In this way, you would be making your manager feel appreciated and happy, while at the same time doing so based on facts/events that have happened.

Based on my own experiences, I have found giving specific reasons why I lauded my supervisors to be rewarding as they also appreciated what I was saying and were aware that I was not simply buttering up to get their favor.

Ask Your Supervisors For Sound Advice And Career Tips

Another point to consider would be that of asking your manager for advice in your career growth (assuming your manager is a good leader and one who is supportive of your growth).

In this case, you can complement your manager based on what you see in his/her leadership style that is truly commendable, such as developing a rapport with each and every member of your team.

Get in the habit of asking your manager for advice based on the good qualities he or she has, however few you think these qualities might be.

By doing so, you would be giving the impression that you are sincerely keen on learning on the job as well as to expand your skillset.

Given my previous work experiences and conversations with peers and former colleagues, I realized the benefits of asking the help of not just one supervisor but spreading one’s efforts across the management board.

I do not like to put all my eggs in one basket in my professional growth and consequently encourage you to spread out your risks.

Simply remain honest and sincere and show your desire to improve your job competency to the point of attaining excellency.

Avoid Office Gossip

Much has been said about the disadvantages of office gossip.

(Previously, I have also written a post about gossiping that you can check out here below.)

While you might think that office gossip and spreading unpleasant comments about the annoying bootlickers in your office might give credence to you as an employee, chances are, such gossip and rumor-mongering might work against you as people might have the impression that you cannot be trusted yourself.

Moreover, another crucial reason why I do not support office gossip is that the bootlicker(s) in question whom you might be targeting at might be so adept in bootlicking that not only your direct boss but also your other teammates have been ‘bought over’ by their insincere praises.

By being the ‘bad guy’ and spreading rumors, you would only be stabbing yourself in the foot.

Not cool.

Let your work performance speak for itself rather than having to resort to backstabbing.

Aim To Help Others — Without Expecting Anything In Return

Before you get me wrong, I must say I am not discounting the significance of having good people’s skills to advance in one’s career.

After all, people tend to buy from and promote/support people whom they like.

I am merely against the viewpoint of getting a promotion or better work terms based on insincere curry-favoring.

Besides the often reiterated people’s skills such as active listening, clear communication as well as tactful negotiation, I base my actions on a question below:

How can I make others’ work-life easier?

As cliched as it might sound, I have found that helping others without expecting anything in return actually made me a lot more joyful — even in the midst of the most dreary office situations.

To add on, helping others has been scientifically proven to boost one’s overall sense of well-being and satisfaction. One research team actually monitored 2000 people over five years and discovered that the people who considered themselves as “very happy” volunteered (without any tangible benefits in return) a minimum of 5.8 hours per month.

The more positive well-being reflected in the research respondents can be attributed to the neuro-chemical boost in volunteers’ brains after doing good deeds—a.k.a. God’s way of rewarding altruistic souls.

Do ‘Little Things With Great Love’

While you might cringe at the notion of having to assume unnecessary responsibilities on the job, making others’ work-life easier need not necessarily take the form of helping your boss or co-worker with his/her work in addition to yours.

Rather, when I ask myself how I can make others’ work-life easier, I think along the simple lines of making their already stressed-out work schedules more bearable at the very least.

Simple gestures like wearing a smile, asking someone genuinely how was his or her day and being genuinely interested in the person’s reply, as well as offering some encouragement to a co-worker (or even a stressed supervisor) can make a huge difference in their working day.

Similarly, if you already have a lot of work on your plate, you can simply help others in your little and genuine ways.

In fact, the little things in life (and in work) do matter, however small they might seem to be.

I take my motto to “do small things with great love” from the life of my own patron saint, Saint Therese of the Child Jesus.

Saint Therese’s Little Way of Spiritual Childhood (in becoming a saint) has been applicable to me in my professional and personal lives as well.

When Saint Therese mentioned “doing small things with great love”, she inspired me to look at the seemingly mundane things and activities in my life in a different manner.

Through Saint Therese, I have been inspired to treat even the most ordinary/banal things of my life as a means where I can serve God and my neighbor, including some of the annoying colleagues I used to encounter in the workplace.

Indeed, I have realized that even insignificant actions can make a huge difference to someone’s day at work.

Someone at work who might be having a terrible mood because of a fight with his/her spouse can find a warm and genuine smile from you as his/her co-worker to be incredibly encouraging.

When I used to live in Japan, I found that many employees (from various companies) committed suicide because of the perceived lack of support and rapport with their bosses and team-mates.

In the rush to become too individualistic, many Japanese companies that were hitherto more group-oriented, have, to a considerable extent, become more and more merciless in that employees tend to regard climbing the corporate ladder as a win-lose race.

Coupled with the general reticence of many Japanese employees with regard to sharing their personal and professional problems with others(this is a simplified and general statement of Japanese culture and is by no means representative of all Japanese people), many have unfortunately resorted to ending their lives in the most gruesome of ways.

Doing “small things with great love” can be an excellent way to contributing intangible as well as in intangible ways to enhancing the rapport between you and your co-workers/bosses.

After all, in life and in work, the small things do matter.

Take Care Of Your Mental Health

I have written a couple of articles about my own experiences with mental health (see the links right at the bottom of this post) and cannot stress the importance of having a calm and stable mind to excel in life and at work.

In short, having good mental health in life and in work will enable you to increase your productivity, sharpen your problem-solving skills and make better professional decisions.

I have found praying as well as confiding in good and trusted people a useful solution to mitigate the toxic effects of toxic colleagues and bosses at the workplace.

Other times, I have learned how to filter in what people say as well as what they do and not to take things too seriously and personally.

On a similar note, by taking your mental health into consideration and by considering more positive perspectives in dealing with toxic workplace behavior, you can maintain your sanity and still have the energy to perform well in your work.

Look For Other Career Options

If you feel that your work environment has been made toxic by the incessant power struggles and bootlicking politics, and if you think your morale, as well as your mental health, has taken a turn for the worse as a result of that, you could consider looking elsewhere for another job or even begin freelancing (if you have good reasons for it).

Looking for another job as well as getting the new job successfully can provide you some motivation to carry on reporting to work in your current toxic work environment until you have fully served your notice period.

Besides, with your ‘personal catalog’ (as described above), it can be easier negotiating for better work terms (such as a pay rise) with another employer.

Afterthoughts

I have been through the unpleasant experiences of being sandwiched in between various “warring factions” in companies as well as in the non-profit organizations etc. I have helped out in.

Although the easiest option for me was to leave, sometimes the benefits of staying in these organizations (provided that I learned to manage such office politics) outweighed the costs.

The tips above were some of the tried-and-tested ways I have undertaken to deal with office politics, without becoming an office politician myself.

Keen to apply one of these tips or all of them? The choice is yours.

Like this post? Check the following, a collection of my anxiety-related posts, below:)