There is Power in Your Story — FreedomCoaching
By: Ashley Grandchamp
Tags: Vulnerability, Community, Storytelling

I love listening to a good story. Audibly, with friends, in movie form, in books…you name it and I am here for it. I want to know more. I want to feel something or gain insight about a particular topic. Sometimes I want to feel kinship with the story teller and other times I am searching for an escape from my own life.

This week I have been thinking a lot about stories. As humans, we love a good story. Love stories, mysteries, stories of triumph and stories of defeat. They intrigue us. Social media influencers stake their lives on the fact that their followers are interested in their life story. Podcasters build platforms and authors invite you into their minds all through story telling. They give us information, warn us of things to come, and allow us to learn from things that have happened in the past. They give us insight into why someone acts the way that they do and how someone got to where they are. Stories lend us someone’s map and explain to us how they got from point A to point B and all of the obstacles they crossed on their journey. Stories keep us on the edge of our seat as we wait to find out if the guy gets the girl or if the family makes it home safely. Tales of romance and love. Tales of upheaval and disappointment. Tales of pure joy and immense sadness. There is power in stories.

But what about your story? What about mine? Do you ever wonder if there is power in your story? If there is, how do you go about sharing it with the world? Oftentimes, I find myself wondering if there is any point in sharing my story. I’m not drastically different from anyone else in the world. I don’t come from great pain and I haven’t overcome any life altering obstacles. I’m just me. Is there power in that? Is there something worth sharing from my ordinary life?

The longer I have sat with this question of if there is power in my story, the more I have realized that there is power in it. There is tremendous power in every story. The power to let someone know that they aren’t alone. The reassurance that comes from knowing someone has walked the same road before you and they are living to tell the tale. There is power in allowing someone to learn from you and your mistakes…big or small. How many times have you heard a story and thought “wow…I thought it was just me, but it isn’t”? When we share our stories we enter into community with those listening. Community brings about healing and restoration. Therefore, sharing our stories has the potential to heal us. If that isn’t power then I don’t know what is.

So what’s the downside? Telling our stories requires vulnerability. Sometimes it requires a lot more vulnerability than we are comfortable with. I mean maybe you love sharing everything about yourself…good, bad and ugly. I do NOT. There are times I want to share my story because I know that it can be helpful to others, but I can’t bring myself to do it because in telling my story I am relinquishing some control over how people perceive me. I’m opening up the gates to criticism and judgement. Sometimes I don’t want to share pieces of my story because there is shame associated with certain parts. It’s a lot more comfortable to hide the hard. Am I right? But what good can come of a hard season if we aren’t able to share it? When we share, we invite others in to help carry the weight of that burden. We allow others to learn from us and course correct in their own lives. That is good. That is productive. If my hard season means someone else doesn’t have to walk through one then it is worth sharing my story. If sharing my hard means that someone else feels seen, heard and loved then it is worth it! So often we want our stories to have endings before we share them. Yes, I will share this season of heartache once I have a story of redemption to go alongside it. Yes, I will share my story of disappointment and loss, but not until I have successes to make people feel more comfortable at the end. Friend, what story are you holding back from sharing because it isn’t tied up neatly with a bow? You don’t have to wait until the end to share the middle. Allowing someone to hear your story in the middle doesn’t mean you will be stuck in that season forever. Allowing someone to hear your story in the messy middle WILL give you community to walk with and people to celebrate the wins with as your story continues to play out.

How do I share? Start at the beginning and go from there. In 2017 I was working at my dream job, doing exactly what I wanted to do. I was in a city that I loved, getting to pour into people that had quickly won over my heart. I was single, finishing my Masters and focused on my new role. I had recently stepped out of a position where I felt overworked and under appreciated. By all accounts I should have been happier than I had ever been. Things were going in my favor and on the outside I was thriving. I was thriving…until I wasn’t. Halfway into the year things seemed to get harder. I wasn’t sure how to manage the expectations and the burdens of those I cared for. I was taking my final two classes for my degree while working a full time job as well as a part time job. I found out that I needed shoulder surgery and I felt this nudge to leave my current position and return to the job that left me feeling overworked and underpaid. I was seeing a therapist to help me figure out how to carry all that I was carrying. (100% fully support therapy for everyone). I found myself having panic attacks often and crying constantly. I stopped eating for a while because in a world that felt out of my control, food was something I could control. I was spiraling and I was doing it in private. I didn’t want to invite anyone in to walk through this season with me. I told people I was okay when I was so far from okay. I couldn’t even be fully transparent with my therapist because I wanted so badly for her to believe I could handle all of the things. I kept everything to myself and I expected healing and restoration to come. Friend, it didn’t. I suffered and continued to suffer until I finally let someone in. Well I didn’t exactly let her in so much as she forced her way in (good friends do that sometimes). I still suffered for parts of that season, but I didn’t suffer alone. I had someone to talk to and someone to encourage me on days that felt impossible to manage. I had someone who was brave enough to share her story with me and because of her I didn’t feel so alone. I felt seen and heard. I felt connected and cared for. There was power in her story. There was power in her messy middle. If she hadn’t stepped in I don’t know what story I would be telling you now. This isn’t a story I have shared with people before, but something tells me that someone needs to hear this right now. Share your story. Even if your story is still in its messy middle. There is power in your story. In your good, bad, sad, ugly, joyous…there is power in all of it! You never know who is needing to hear your story, so be open to sharing it,

Where do I share? The limit does not exist. (catch the Mean Girls reference there?) You can share on podcasts, blog posts, Insta Stories and Facebook. You can create a Facebook group with the people you want to form community with and share your story with them. You could write a book, draw a picture or paint a mural. But friend, you can also write in a journal for your eyes only. You can ask a safe person to come over and share with them. Sharing your story can look however you want it to look, but hear me when I say THERE IS POWER IN YOUR STORY so let it be heard!