Lost To Time
By: Ngang God'Swill N.
Tags: Nonfiction, Growing Up, Brothers, Memories, A Cornered Gurl

Lost To Time

Photo by Jude Beck on Unsplash

It always seems so far, those days we played in the rain and chased each other for hours. The times we sat up late, sharing experiences we lived together or a movie we had seen. Your laugh was the rarest music, and your smile the kindest view; yet you were a merry, jolly fellow. I looked forward to the times we would be together, enjoying the fast-paced lifestyle of our youthful days. It was seven years we had, then three to add. And for each of those ten years, I learned new things about you and lived wonderful experiences. Eating wild fruits and trying new things

I remember how together we marched into college like soldiers on a mission; I had my first real kiss that year; she was offering and I was a teenage boy (Hey! That’s my idea of an excuse).

It was always a pleasure to take on the challenges we did together: sports class, nights out and cooking attempts (Hahaha). I always knew that someday, life would swing us apart and we won't be able to fight for the little moments we enjoy together and that we will find happiness in other people; moving on as though our moments never were. And so, sometimes when we talked, I wondered how life will be, when the separation finally comes and the path together separates to hopefully cross again in years to come.

What I enjoyed most about us was the ease with which we synced in discussions even after weeks of no talks; even though this is when time came to call us to where we must be right about now. Our friends noted us for chatting idly on the streets for hours on end, as though that was the last time we were gonna see each other. For a rich kid, you made a pretty decent friend, honest, empathetic, loyal and kind. I hated that you didn't eat much, to me not only were you hurting yourself, but it was the only act of unkindness you did towards someone; and it was your very self. Remember when you almost passed out because of poor feeding? It rattled me to my very core.

It all seems lost to time now. Trapped in an ever-churning machine, processing those times together into memories lost to our brains. Slowly blending those hours into our personalities; so in a way, we are who we are, thanks to each other.

Now, with the fully-grown beards and a tiny mine to dig up a few coins, we are trapped in adult life; the grind. It’s hard to think of anything else but the pending assignment or the next one, the current stage in life, or the next one. Hell, I caught myself thinking about marriage and names for kids.

In all my days, I have never seen anyone much like you; your simple nature and your kindness. Your views on life are so monumentally mind-blowing and sometimes near-fictional; and I know that you are just one small man trying to get by, but somehow, in my heart of hearts, I am looking straight up at the sky to see your star shine brightly. I am young, and I am patient, so when your star does shine as I know it will, I will point to you and say “If ever a man was worthy of what he has earned, it’ll be you.”

Till we meet again Enzo, I wish you the very best this world has to offer.