Granny vs Sexy — Top 3 who Care about their Underwear
By: Marilyn Flower
Tags: Fashion, Humor, Writing, Self, Sexuality

I was on a blogging zoom call, and someone complained that no one was commenting on the posts they had spilled their heart, soul, and guts into. You know, topics like divorce, abuse, women in politics, were not getting the back and forth community dialogue she craved.

I suggested she write about granny panties. Why?

Because I’ve noticed that whenever someone does so on this platform, it generates a lot of comments.

Those of us who wear underwear feel strongly about our choices, which boil down to comfort vs. sexy in most cases.

Not exactly red vs. blue or vegan vs. paleo, but an issue with camps who defend their choices eloquently and explicitly.

So in lifting up three of my favorite pieces on this foundational topic, and their honest and thought-provoking authors, I also want to acknowledge the community that cares about what it wears underneath it all.

So here goes:

First up is Yael Wolfe for her post called, What do Your Panties say about You?

Yael takes a historical perspective, starting with her mother’s worrying about the accident she might get into where someone sees her unmentionables. How many of us grew up with mothers like hers who feel that the state of the panty is a direct reflection on the quality of their parenting? I suspect many if not most of us.

But if anyone had a mom or dad that said, I don’t care what you’re wearing, I just want to know you’re alright, hooray!

Ms. Wolfe, along with the other two, shares her clear preference for the covering comfort of cotton. If they got the name Granny Panties, perhaps that’s cause grandmothers are wise and sensible women we should listen to and head.

The upshot seems to be that the sexier undergarments are less comfortable and made with fabrics that don’t breathe. And even worse, some have a string going up your crack that at best, take some getting used to.

One thing I noticed is the skimpier they are, the more they cost. And if you want a pair where the manufacturers forgot to sew the crotch seam together, that costs even more.

In her frank and intimate story of her relationship to intimate apparel, Yael includes the relationship of the man with whom she is in a relationship’s relationship to her intimate apparel.

Other writers mention that they wear what they wear with the men in mind, but not necessarily what the man actually thinks of the garments. Nice touch. (Her post has 21 comments.)

Creating a smooth foundation

Shaunta Grimes takes the foundational approach in her story, I’ve Started Wearing Granny Panties and I’m Never Going Back.

Foundational here has two meanings, as I understand it. One is that her choice of underwear is considered foundational because it provides some compression and support.

Given corsets and girdles are largely things of the past, she distinguishes her newfound garments from Spanx and other super tight to hold you in, but far from comfortable shapewear garments.

In other words, these panties provide some shaping and yet are still very, very comfortable. How cool is that! And being for sale at Target as well as online, they are affordable. Not like the $40 I paid for a shaping garment I have to squeeze into.

The other meaning of the term foundational is about providing a smooth foundation for a smooth look under her new wardrobe. Shaunta is all about discovering her style and finding her very own look, as well as a leading blogger and writing teacher.

You can follow her journey on her new publication, A Style of my Own, Shaunta shares with us, via words and photos, how color lights us up or dulls us down.

She’s blazing a new trail many of us hope to follow. So thank you, Shaunta. And makes an excellent case for why what’s underneath the outerwear is crucial for a smooth look. (Her piece has ten comments.)

Every “war” has two sides

To round out this discussion, we have Tracey Folly’s article, My Sensible Undergarments Are Destroying My Sexuality. Tracey had actually converted to Granny panties and then rethought her decision.

It was based on confidence. Sexual confidence.

She previously wrote about her ability to feel sexually confident even in a sensible undergarment. Then things changed, and she re-visited her decision. It wasn’t working out the way she hoped it would.

But rather than go all the way back to scratchy lace and the thongs that drove her crazy, she’s looking for a both/and solution. Underwear that’s both sexy and comfortable. Most likely cotton, but with a little something extra.

I appreciate how she made space for this possibility. She hasn’t written a third post, as far as I know, so we’re not sure how the story ended. But I applaud her willingness to share the changes she went through on her search.

What I couldn’t find and miss very much are all the comments I remember her first article having. There was one in particular by a man which I found deeply moving. He confessed that if he was lucky enough to have a woman take her panties down for him, he was beyond caring what kind they are or how they look.

So maybe it comes down to pleasing ourselves first and foremost.

I honor these writers for their willingness to engage with an intimate subject in public. And while my current vote is for comfort, that wasn’t always the case.

Unlike politics, there won’t be a vote after the debates. Unless you consider our shopping dollars as our ballots.

Hopefully, I’ve gotten to the bottom of the issue. So in the interest of keeping this as brief as possible, I’ll end things here.