The Trouble With Adult Acne
By: Najwa Helyer
Tags: Women, Personal, Life, Acne, Adult Acne

One thing that adults don’t tell you growing up is that, for some, acne continues even after puberty. Somewhere along the way, I became part of the statistic of adults that has adult acne.

Weirdly so, when I was a teenager my acne was at bay all the way through my early 20s. My skin was relatively alright and when I started birth control it got even better. Since the results of my skin from birth control were positive, I stayed on it for a few years.

Birth control isn’t what I’m going to talk about, but I did believe birth control was amazing. My skin was great and most of the things that you hear about birth control are all good stuff — but it really isn’t. I had to find out the hard way of the downsides to birth control than what is advertised. Ladies, if there’s no birth control out there that is 100% effective, don’t sacrifice your body and sanity for it. It’s not worth it.

Maybe I’ll write about it another time.

That’s what insecurity does to you. It makes you feel like there’s a spotlight on the things that you wish you could hide about yourself.

Last year when I finally got off birth control, there it was…the truth of my skin. Acne. Not just normal acne, but adult acne. It took a while for me to get used to, I hated looking in the mirror and my usage of makeup, especially foundation, increased. Which ultimately made my skin worse but that was the vicious cycle that I was on.

What people don’t tell you about living with adult acne

People stare at you..all the time. Working in the industry I’m in, I rarely ever wear makeup. There’s no point considering I’m sweating all day, so I just go out bare-faced every day. And people stare.

They look at you while you speak and I can feel when I meet potential clients that they’re not just looking at me, but they’re looking at my skin. Sometimes people even tell me what I should do and products to use to get my skin right. Yes, I’ll take all the recommendations, it’s really appreciated…but not while I’m talking to you about work.

Not only that but looking for a job is difficult too. When I was unemployed was the first few months of my acne acting up, it wasn’t easy. It was horrible and difficult to cover up the acne so going to job interviews was a hassle. Just like racial or gender discrimination, a survey has shown that 78% of respondents were less likely to be hired based on acne or blemishes on their skin. I’m already brown and a woman, I guess life couldn’t just make it easy for me…

I’m happy to show others there’s nothing to hide, but that’s not my main intention neither is it my life goal. I just want to be comfortable in my own skin.

Self-esteem? Never heard of it

Instagram culture has created a false sense of image for everyone. As someone who has worked with multiple “Instagram influencers,” I just have to say…they don’t look like that in real life. Huge pores, old acne scars and pigmentation is so normal, don’t let photoshop fool you.

Somehow that doesn’t stop me from looking into the mirror all day. I examine my skin from my hairline all the way down to my jaw, if I had one of those magnified mirrors, I’d never leave my bathroom.

Pictures? Yeah, that’s never going to happen either. Since my adult acne came in strong last year, I haven't taken a picture of myself ever since. My phone is only filled with pictures of me where I have makeup on and a filter added over it. The pressure to look beautiful has never been up this high.

It gravely affects your mental health as well. There are days when I never leave the house just so I don’t have to put makeup on and when I do, I never stop looking at myself sometimes. I fear so much that people can see the acne I’m hiding under all that makeup.

It sounds self-centred, but that’s what insecurity does to you. It makes you feel like there’s a spotlight on the things that you wish you could hide about yourself. The trouble is though, your face is the first thing people see so you just want to hide forever.

I’m not brave, I’m just trying to live

When Lizzo said that she’s not being brave by being her true self, I’m not being brave by bearing my skin out to the world either. It’s so hard to pick myself up after talking myself down without people trying to think that I’m trying to be an “inspiration.”

Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy to show others there’s nothing to hide, but that’s not my main intention neither is it my life goal, I just want to be comfortable in my own skin. Saying that I’m “brave” is a back-handed compliment. Am I not supposed to be the way that I am due to my acne? Am I suppose to be hiding too?