How to Be Your Most Courageous Self
By: Sam Ripples
Tags: Mental Health, Relationships, Courage, Fear, Self

There’s no easy way to face your fears, but only you can overcome them.

1. Learn the Litany of Fear

Have you ever read the book “Dune” by Frank Herbert? It’s a fantastical sci-fi novel that is part of a larger series, and during the training of the main character he learns something called the Litany of Fear. Ever since I first read these words, they felt like a calling from another place, as though just reminding me of long-lost knowledge. Learning the Litany of Fear and reciting it to yourself can be a useful way to stop fear in its tracks and become your most courageous self.

“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer.

Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.

I will face my fear.

I will permit it to pass over me and through me.

And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.

Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.

Only I will remain.”

Oftentimes during hard times, I think of the second line. “Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.” If we allow ourselves to succumb to fear’s brittle and harsh words, we will not even know who we are once it is gone. So instead, “permit it to pass over me and through me”, so I may remain once it has left me.

Learning the Litany has helped me to face my fears often. There is almost nothing more powerful to me when I am in a deep fog.

Photo by diana spatariu on Unsplash

2. Take Steps Towards Your Wildest Dreams

Fear is an intricate beast. One of the main drawbacks of listening to its nefarious voice is that is have the ability to crush your dreams before you’ve even gone after them. Instead of taking the time to think about everything that could go wrong, write down a few actionable steps that you can take that will one day lead you to your dreams.

Making an actionable plan that leads you towards your aspirations and life goals. There is always a step you can take, no matter how small, that will get you closer to these dreams, and they don’t have to be large ones. However, the more you move forward with fulfilling your life’s purpose, the more you will be able to love yourself and respect yourself enough to be brave instead of giving into fear.

3. Let Fear Motivate You to Act on Your Best Impulses

If you have ever lost anyone who is close to you unexpectedly, you know how important it is to appreciate the precious time you have with people on this planet. The same goes for your own life — you never know when it could end, so why not use that fear to instead motivate you to go after the things you’ve always dreamed of?

Fear does not need to be an enemy — it can be a helpful friend that gives you a nudge when you are hesitating for too long. It’s important to listen to fear’s nudges but not to allow yourself to be controlled by them. Clear and critical thinking cannot happen when you are constantly dominated by the constraints of fear.

Photo by Noah Buscher on Unsplash

4. Don’t Get Caught Up in What Other People Think

I’ve always been a bit rebellious, but even I have limitations when it comes to pushing other people’s limits. What strangers think of me matters far less than what my family and friends do, but I still live in society — there’s almost no way to avoid the opinions of others. However, when you are caught in the hands of fear, it’s easy to fall into the trap of pleasing others instead of caring for yourself.

I went through a situation recently where I lost almost all semblance of myself in another person. Instead of fighting for who I am, I decided it would be easier to just roll over and become the person that he wanted me to. And now that he’s gone, I’m a bit lost as to who I am anymore. It has taken me almost a week to remember that I have food preferences and other preferences that I can take into account now.

Don’t allow yourself to dive so deep into pleasing and helping others that you become a shade of yourself. It’s important to please and help yourself as well. Take time to do the things that make you happy, not others, and you may be surprised by how brave you feel. No one else can save you from your own fear and self-loathing except for you.

5. Let Your Heart Tell You What is Right

When we are brave, we are listening to what the deepest parts of us say is right. There is nothing more meaningful than following your deepest dreams and desires, but when your heart tells you something is wrong, it’s time to listen.

For the past few days, I’ve been languishing in the memories of me and another, but last night, instead, I let my heart take the lead. And after I finished rearranging everything to my liking, I felt a lot more like myself. It only took one small act — me getting up from the couch — to make my heart a bit happier.

Being brave is not a one-time occurrence — it is something we must practice each day, over and over, until it becomes a habit. But when we listen to the deepest parts of ourselves with unmatched intensity, there is almost nothing we cannot accomplish.

Photo by Tim Marshall on Unsplash

Final Thoughts

Bravery is not a feeling. It is a constant act of resistance against your base impulses, those that would pull you down into a more bitter and angry state.

Instead of focusing on bravery, focus on sitting with your fear. Focus on going after things despite feeling unsure. Focus on yourself, and on what you were put on this planet to accomplish. Everything else will fall into place.