What silly romance movies forget to mention about real romance
By: Auntie Emma
Tags: Romance, Marriage, Wedding, Dating, Family

Hollywood romance is fine and all, one might point out, if you’re still twelve. Real-life romance has beef to it, it is real, but it doesn’t seem to be for everybody. Too many people these days bail before a real relationship has taken hold, chasing some fantasy version of romance that will never last, simply for superficially good looks, maybe. Chasing for fleeting lust while hoping for lasting love.

Traditional family values have gotten lost in the ever more self-centric world of Instagram accounts and endless selfies promoting perfect bodies and a jet-set lifestyle at the cost of true happiness. People have lost sight of what truly matters in a relationship; love, presence, just being there for each other as a family. The modern woman is screaming in pain: “Please, will someone take care of me, too? My needs… Or is this world gone deaf to another soul’s agony?”

What women want out of a relationship is a man who protects her from emotional hurt and takes care of her basic needs. She doesn’t want gold and diamonds, what she needs is to trust someone to be there for her everyday life. Someone safe to turn to, a reliable man to carry the responsibilities required of a husband and a father. He is a man who feels honored by the role of a husband, not burdened by it. He doesn’t run from his responsibilities but stands firm between the world and his family, always strong and reliable.

She, on the other hand, provides him with love and care. She is his reward for being a real man, they are each others’ pride and joy. She simply wants someone to stick around, she isn’t asking for huge muscles, a chiseled chin, or a full head of hair, all she wants is someone reliable to share her life with. She doesn’t really want a hero, either, just someone to lock the doors at night before bedtime, someone to be there for her and their children.

All she truly asks for is to be seen as the mother of his (future) children, not as some sex bomb with no opinions of her own. She doesn’t want to have to walk around in sexy clothes just to keep him interested in staying, nor does she want to worry about extra pounds of weight that she might collect over the years.

When they are dating, she is turned on by his protectiveness, his quiet and strong manner, and is impressed by his friendly and personable behavior toward her friends. If he would be able to help out her family or friends in any small way, she couldn’t be more proud of him.

He should be introduced to her family before they get too serious, just to get their blessing. Her family must love him, his family must love her because nobody is truly dating for themselves alone, but for their entire family. Marriage combines families together, and such matters must be addressed when dating someone. People marry for their parents and their friends, and harmony must be preserved when introducing new people to a family.

He’ll charm her friends by simply being in their company at times, before understandingly making his exit to meet up with his own friends. Modern women do not want a man to be too clingy, but to have his own friends — preferably not spending every night at the pub, tho, and hopefully not being too much of a stranger to it, either — given that would be a little too pious for today’s standards! One must maintain certain respect in the community, but then again forgiveness is a beautiful thing! At the end of the day, what holds them together is the stick together -attitude, and there’s really NOTHING that could pull them apart! That is why they need the support of the entire family to ensure they stay strong together.

Relationships are much a decision to stay together, and although they both understand that the community’s respect is important, they’d forgive each other ANYTHING, and they’d stick together no matter what. They see relationships as a ‘till death do us part deal, and… Sometimes, rocking the boat is simply fun, telling the truth! Do not set the goals too high to be stressful, but a little boat rocking keeps things fresh and exciting!

Together, they will build a life together, set up a house and a home for their children to grow up in. Add a dog in the yard for extra romance points, but let’s face it — some things add a little too much for the real-life workload. She prefers things traditional enough but simple, and he appreciates her natural ability to keep their home looking nice. However, she will love him for his understanding when the kids make it impossible for her to keep up with her usual home-making standards. Of course, a modern man won’t run from the vacuum cleaner, even though a modern woman can still run from a drill!

Whether she works out of the house or is a stay-at-home mom, her dream come true would be to work together with her husband, side-by-side in a family-owned business. Neither one truly cares what line of business it would be, these are things to negotiate on. It is simply a question of which one of them has the better idea, and both would love to team up and make that into a mutually shared business, as a family.

Some may say they are “too suburbian”, but they love their life meeting friends and family for home-cooked meals and barbeque parties. They love to be surrounded by the people they love, their children, and perhaps a few good, well-acquainted neighbors who understand their way of life. They don’t really want unpleasantness into their lives, there’s truly no need for it, but whatever rebellious teenager they need to raise together, they can rise to the challenge, together as a couple, and as a family.

But idyllic as all this may sound, they are not without the ability to fight for their own space in the family unit. They love to have a good battle here and there, both standing firm to their stance until it’s established who gets the crown this time. They don’t like people who dilly-dally around things and who can’t fight for what they want — how else would you ensure everyone gets their way in a family…? Everyone, well, at least the head of the house, that is!

Not too traditional to believe in female leadership, they do need to establish who rules the rooster in the house, him or her, and they both feel more comfortable knowing which one knows how to do things best. It is difficult to combine the lives of two adult people as it is, so knowing who is the leader helps matters there. Whoever is the second in charge, would do wisely to challenge the leadership with the tough questions every now and again, not to leave the leader alone in their position — while respecting their decisions in the end.

If you believe this is the way relationships should be, please comment. Raise your voice to explain the lost values to those who don’t appreciate your way of thinking. If you are too much of an individual for this, do express how we can help you become a better person.

I joined to Medium today and realized it will require you to have a premium account to read posts on here. I find it unfair and I am not doing this for money. Therefore, I started my own blog instead. I hope you understand my intention is to help, not to tout my own horn.