7 Non-sexy Words That Will Stop Everyone From Following You
By: Tim Ebl
Tags: Life Lessons, Resume, This Happened To Me, Life Hacking, Self Help

7 Non-sexy Words That Will Stop Everyone From Following You

First impressions are important. When someone ends up at your profile, their brain cross-references all the words and the picture in that first few seconds to make a snap decision. And it isn’t just in profiles.

These words work their way into resumes, author bios and personal descriptions too. Anywhere that you are putting yourself out there with written words and a picture, you want to use only the best. Choose your words carefully.

Follow or forget. Stay or go. Swipe right or swipe left. Thumbs up, or down. Resume in the garbage can, or called for an interview.

You don’t want to sound weak. You want to give confidence. Show up with strength and sass. If you have the right words and profile picture, your new friend will stick around instead of running for the hills.

“My favorite special skill on my resume is ‘excellent monkey noises.’ ” —Ciara Renee

But if you use sad, wishy-washy words and phrases, why would they bother with you? It’s all about what’s in it for them. They need to see some advantage in following you. If you just make them feel icky, they’re gone.

Here is a list of sad words I pulled from social media profiles. I scanned hundreds of pages of story clappers on a ton of posts to collect the words that follow. I went down rabbit holes on other platforms too, to bring you this list.

Don’t worry, I eliminated all the names to protect the innocent.

If you are currently using one of these words, I’m sorry, okay? Since I’m Canadian, you know I’m not trying to hurt your feelings. I’m just trying to help.

1. Aspiring

The word aspiring gets used all over the place. It makes you sound lacking. Please don’t use it.

“I’m an aspiring writer.” Okay, so you aren’t currently writing, but someday you want to? Why don’t you start? All you need to do to be a writer is to write, right?

If what you mean is that someday you want to quit your “day job” and write full time, great. But in the meantime, you used a weak word.

To aspire means to long for it, but know that you will probably never get it. It sounds like loser talk. Jettison the loser word and move on.

What to use instead:

Say what you are. Not what you aspire to be. If you write, put writer. If you act, put actor.

2. Musings

Musing sounds a lot like this other crappy word: muttering. And who mutters? Crazy people, or those with an axe to grind.

Imagine a man with a messy beard, lighting his pipe. He combed his hair just last week. He sits on a stuffed chair surrounding by books and takeout containers. Taking a big pull on the pipe, he starts musing and muttering. To no one, because who would listen to a musing mutterer?

Sitting around musing is not valuable. It doesn’t count as a product. No one is searching far and wide for just the right musings.

Musing impacts people about as much as muttering does. If they even notice, they think your mental boat sprang a leak and won’t reach the shore of common sense. Bystanders are sure that the brain elevator doesn’t go to the top floor.

Go ahead and listen to your muse. But don’t inflict your musings on me.

What to use instead:

There is no word! Tell me what you have that I want. I don’t want personal essays, or scribblings, or thoughts, or musings. Those all sound like crumpled up pages found on your office floor.

Be specific. “I write about bacon.” There! Is that so hard?

3. Just

Why would you ever put “Just a guy who” or I’m just a girl” in your profile? What is your goal?

What it tells me and others is that you think there’s nothing special about you. You’re “just” another guy. So I guess there’s just no reason to follow you instead of some other random male personage on this site. Goodbye.

I don’t get it. I don’t feel like “just” a guy. Do you? Aren’t we all better than that?

Be proud of yourself. You aren’t “just” another profile. You have value. Let us know what it is. Otherwise, anyone visiting your profile will “just” leave.

What to use instead:

Use nothing! Eradicate this word with a flamethrower and move on.

4. Only

This one is the same as “just.” Don’t put yourself down. You’re worth something.

Step up and own your personhood. You aren’t “only” a girl who wants to write. You’re not “only” a school teacher with an opinion.

What to use instead:

Use words that let us know who you are.

“I am a student and happy.” This one’s perfect! Specific, descriptive, I want to follow this guy just because he knows how to write words that say stuff.

5. Niche

Look, this word is right up there with moist. It’s tired and overused. It has no place in your profile. Please don’t mention the moist niche that you’ve ensconced yourself in.

It doesn’t sound attractive. And besides, everyone else is doing it, so you become “just” another niche happy person.

What to use instead:

Words that describe what you love, what you write about, or what you focus on. Unless you love niches. If adore placing objects in recessed openings, fitting them into their own little niche, then go for it.

6. Amazeballs

Yup. Someone out there is using this fine word in his profile. He is telling us that his golf(?) balls are amazing.

Don’t, alright? It’s very unsexy. Yuck.

What to use instead:

Something less disgusting, please. Don’t put anything in your profile that makes me think you send private-part pics, too.

7. Self-Proclaimed

Yet another pointless word choice. It introduces doubt. If you have to self proclaim, does that mean you’re just a pretender?

People self proclaim that they are all kinds of things.

“I’m a self-proclaimed sandwich artist” means the same thing as “I’m a sandwich artist,” except people might believe it if you weren’t only proclaiming it yourself. And you better be framing those sandwiches before you just hang them on the wall, or you aren’t much of an artist, are you?

What to use instead:

Go with the words that you need. “I’m a dog training enthusiast” versus “I’m a self-proclaimed dog training expert.” Don’t beat around the bush. Get right in that bush and own it.

7.5 Bonus Sad Word: Trying

Don’t try to do something. As Nike would tell you, just do it! Why waste time trying weakly.

“Just trying to muddle my way through this world.” Putting this in your profile means you admit you aren’t going to make your way through, even by muddling. This profile is the opposite of a winner. This is a crawl-in-the-mud loser.

“Do, or do not. There is no try.” — Yoda

What to use instead:

Solid action words are best.

Instead of “trying to finish writing my first novel,” let us know that “I’m working on my first novel.” Or even better, “My first novel will be complete by January.”

Show us you’re making progress. Trying tells us you are stuck.

Conclusion

People don’t enjoy seeing these words in profiles, bios or author descriptions:

Aspiring

Musings

Just

Only

Niche

Amazeballs (all right, maybe this one isn’t common, but don’t use it, ok?)

Self-proclaimed

Trying

“Number one — and I want you to emblaze this on your brain — you only have one chance to make a first impression.” —Judy Sheindlin

Your bio, author description and profile pitch matters. Don’t waste the opportunity with these words. Maybe they don’t bother you personally. But what about that visitor who could choose the “follow” button, or just leave? They only need to feel a moment’s disinterest or negative association, and they’re gone.