Winter is here!
By: Parika Bhatli
Tags: Depression, Feelings, Mental Health Awareness, Seasons, Mental Health

Hello folks, ’tis is the season of Christmas and so of winters and holidays. I hope you are doing just fine and cuddling with your favourite buddy and sipping in some hot chocolate. Today I will talk about winters being trouble for a depression survivor. Yeah, it sounds a bit abrupt, but that’s the truth. Let’s begin!

Okay, so winters are usually a season where everything seems to be comfortable, pretty, festive, lovable and a season full of emotions right? But for a depression survivor, it’s the most challenging season to survive as the sun sets early and the darkness around you increases with no time. During evening time you feel lost, you think blank as to what next? And it’s not a one-day thing. It’s a feeling that goes the entire season. I can be sure of it because I have been feeling it since 2018.

My two winters have gone in vain as I was not in the right frame of mind even to feel that it’s winters. I was so much into anti-depressants that I barely know how I survived those winters. I guess maybe because of the medication it just passed away, but this year, 2020 I am into my whole self, and I am conscious enough to feel winters this time. And I must tell you it’s not at all easy going. I do follow a proper routine, which includes my food intake on time, walk with my pet under the sun because it’s very very important to be under the sun for a depression patient as it’s one of the best cures for your mood swings and of course vitamin D.

For a depression survivor, it’s very tough to fight both this illness and winters as the mind gets too exhausted. Along with this, the physical and emotional capabilities tend to freeze probably because of the laziness the weather causes. Most people will relate to me as to what I am trying to convey because it gets tough to explain to a person who has never been into depression or understand its repercussions. Depression and winters don’t go along well. Both after darkness acts so lousily and lethargic that the person tends to get confused as to what is going on. The moment you are having an excellent fine day with your family/friends by evening that turns out be a disaster as the mind is unable to cope up with so much darkness around and it acts as if that darkness is visible only to you, but that is not the case. Mind tricks you into believing that way. It makes sure that you only see the negative side of darkness and not the other way around. Now people will be like what’s the positive side of the night; well, it’s the calmness, silence and peace. You have to look beyond that. Open your horizons, breathe a little and believe.

My depression journey and winters have been like a roller coaster ride, but then I can’t ignore any of them because both are part of me; the illness as well as the season. If I have survived this much and I think I will be able to survive this winters too so you can also. It will help if you accept what is happening to you. Talk about it with your loved ones or therapist or me (if you feel like) and fight the goddamn thing. We are in this together, and we will get over it too. Just sit back, enjoy the last days of this crazy year and be proud of the journey you have so far built. It’s only you who can fight this shit and take one day at a time. I believe in you so you should consider yourself too. All will be fine my fellow warriors, take one day at a time and stay happy, healthy and safe.

I will end this blog by a tweet -

“You don’t always have to do stuff. Or achieve stuff. You don’t have to spend your free time productively. You don’t have to be doing Tai Chi and DIY and bread making. Sometimes you can be and feel things and get through and eat crisps and survive, and that’s more than enough.” - Matt Haig

Take care, hugs from afar. Breathe and let it go.

See you until next time. ❤