Happy Poor, Unhappy Rich
By: Andy Millard
Tags: Money, Poverty, Happiness, Poor, Wealth

Think you’d be happier if you had more money? Think again.

We’ve all heard that money can’t buy happiness, but most folks don’t really believe it. The opposing view may be best encapsulated in writer/editor Beatrice Kaufman’s famous quote, “I’ve been rich, and I’ve been poor. Rich is better.”

Photo by Travis Essinger on Unsplash

The lines between the poor, middle class and rich are not always clear. Perhaps you can relate to the childhood story of my brother-in-law, Bobby. He grew up on the wrong side of the tracks in a four-room mill house with two brothers, a sister, two parents and a granny. His parents barely scraped by. But in the innocence of childhood, he blithely assumed that his life was typical and prosperous. It wasn’t until he was about 15 that he looked around and said to himself, “Huh. We might be poor.”

I’ve known people at both ends of the wealth spectrum, and it seems to me that strong arguments can be made on both sides of the issue. But I suspect that most folks would agree with the Depression-era comic strip character Little Orphan Annie. When told by the fabulously wealthy Daddy Warbucks that “a poor man sure has a lot less to worry about,” she responds: “Yeah, and a lot less to eat sometimes.”

Let’s look at two starkly different illustrations.

A few years back, I was acquainted with a local guy who had every right to be unhappy. He was extremely poor. His house was like a hovel. His wife had serious health problems. And — I kid you not — he worked in a graveyard. But he always seemed to be cheerful and happy. I’ll never forget one day I saw him after work. It had been raining all day; he was wet and muddy. I asked him what he’d been doing that day, and he replied with a toothy grin, “Diggin’ up bodies.” True story.

Now, there’s a guy whose happiness is not defined by his circumstances. Why is he happy? I suspect it may be partly because he knows he’s earning his keep. What little money he spends is money he earned with his own labors.

Now, let’s look at the other end of the spectrum. Have you ever known someone with lots and lots of money who was unhappy?

Don’t get me wrong. There are plenty of very happy and well-adjusted wealthy people. But I’ve also known some folks with plenty of money who are miserable — and I think it’s pretty common. Lottery winners can provide a stark example of this.

Consider the true story of Billie Bob Harrell, Jr. who won $31 million in the Texas Lottery. By all accounts, Billie Bob was a good and religious man. He was generous with his good fortune, buying homes and cars for loved ones and loaning money to others. But eventually, he came to feel like his only value lay in the fact that he had money. Everybody wanted something from him. His marriage fell apart, his family disintegrated, and in the end, he killed himself. (source: Houston Press)

As I say, that’s a stark example, but who’s better off: the lottery winner or my grave-digger friend?

Perhaps more to the point, what if the grave-digger were to win the lottery? At his job, he gets a day’s pay for a day’s work, but if he wins the lottery, he gets a lifetime’s pay for no work. For someone in that situation, it’s not a stretch to think of yourself as a giant freeloader. If you can’t find a value proposition for yourself beyond just having and spending money, you’re not likely to be very happy.

Money is important, it really is. But it should support the major priorities of your life — not become the major priority of your life.

So you might not want to envy the next big lottery winner too much, because money and value can be two different things.

This column is not intended as advice but rather education, commentary and opinion. Consult a professional advisor. If you have general questions about financial planning or investments, feel free to submit them to Andy at camillard@mac.com.