How to make $1000s from writing articles on Medium
By: Brad Dibben
Tags: Ｍedium, Funny, Freelance Writing, Writing, Make Money Blogging

How to make $1000s from writing articles on Medium

Actual picture of me 28 seconds after publishing this article

Discovering Medium was a great relief for a struggling freelance writer like myself.

Finally, I had found a place where other writers and content producers came together to brag about their earnings and provide enticing, unreasonable promises about how I could do just the same.

All I had to do next was listen to their humbling advice, and my career — as well as my bank account — would start skyrocketing into infinity.

My journey

I started browsing the site about a month ago in the hopes that I could perfect my writing skills by carefully listening to and learning from a broad variety of voices who were actually making money in the game.

Thankfully, I didn’t need to do any of that.

I was able to receive, straight to my inbox, sage advice from a total of maybe two guys, everything I needed to know about making money by writing on Medium.

And the dirty rhetorical secret that engages the reader and provides instant gratification when the following sentence is read? It was simpler than I could have ever imagined.

In the course of my browsings on the site, I have discovered the keys that instantly unlock unbridled popularity and success on the platform. A formula that is covertly encoded into each and every one of the top performing articles on Medium in the ‘Writing’ niche.

So, here it is, perfectly broken down into small chunks suitable for the speed-reading faux-entrepreneur.

Step #1: The Perfect Title and Sub-title

The importance of this first principle can’t be overstated.

To the frequent Medium reader it should go without saying, but any successful writing piece on Medium absolutely has to include a monetary figure in the title, along with the indication that earning said figure is simple/easy/quick.

It could be $10,000, $5,000, or $1,000, but don’t make it any less than $1000. Remember, you’re selling a dream here. Realistic expectations for beginner writers should be hidden in the first few pages of a purchasable writing guide E-book, not on freely accessible articles.

By the way, did I mention I’ve got an E-book for sale? You can buy it for way too much money on the back-pages of Amazon, and its a great gateway for my more expensive mentorship program, specifically designed for gullible idiots such as yourself.

How to make $1000s from publishing articles on Medium It was totally easy and took no time at all

That works. Other suitable candidates include:

How I made $10,000 in two weeks from writing alone (Hint: it was easier than you might imagine) I make shed loads of cash sitting on my arse Here’s how you can do the same

Those pieces will be available to read on my profile very soon.

Step #2: Writing for dummies

Your audience is made up of would-be writers. This surely means that the writing style itself should accommodate complicated ideas, maintain a rich and variable lexicon, and be of substantial length to satisfy the wordy reader’s appetite, right?

Wrong. Moron.

The writing style should be exceedingly, wait, hang on.

The writing style should be very simple. Absolutely no paragraphs should be longer than four lines. This is so that the reader can skim the text with one eye whilst meditating and reading a Tim Ferriss book with the other eye.

Also, and I can’t stress this enough, it is very important to occasionally make a sentence bold.

This grabs the readers attention, and relays a very important tenet in the reader/writer dynamic— I know you aren’t really reading all of this, and that’s ok. You’re here for quick takeaways and I’m here for clicks. It’s a win win. Ok, four lines. I can sense I’m losing some of you now so I’ll move on.

Step #3: Content is, unfortunately, king

You’ve got your title and $ub-title. You’ve cut down your ideas into elementary chunks, and at least one sentence is in captivating bold. What now?

Very few writers I interact with have discovered this next industry secret. A little-known key combination used mostly by programmers and computer boffins. I was able to get insider information on how to execute this command and have since discovered that the top writers here use it every day.

Ctrl+C, Ctrl+V.

This magical command has the power to take your article and produce a copy of it in another destination. Why is this useful, you ask?

Well, if you have a perfect copy of your article in another draft, you can simply change a few words and render the piece brand new, instantly ready for re-publishing. You can repeat this ad-infinitum (this is latin for ‘a super long time’).

This mechanism was actually the inspiration for the invention of the first ‘money printing machine’, which, ironically, is a popular nickname for many of the top-earning Medium writers.

Conclusion

So, there you have it. A practical, step-by-step guide for gaining a top-spot in the Medium writing machine. Here’s a salient quote from Confucius:

“H e who learns but does not think, is lost! He who thinks but does not learn is in great danger” — Confucius

It has nothing to do with anything I just said, but it does substantiate the fact that I utilised secondary research in the making of this article. Which is good.

My content and copy writing company is called Adsworth, at www.adsworth.uk.

We specialise in marketing-driven content and copy production, and sniping sarcasm apparently.