So You Wanna Be An Escort
By: William, Dollar Bill
Tags: Culture, Escorts, Lifestyle, Education, Sex Work

So You Wanna Be An Escort

A guide to making the big bucks safely

Photo by Ferdinand Studio from Pexels

Reading back through the old stuff, I get why New York State wanted to lock me up. If you actually believe that selling sex is a crime (which I find preposterous), you definitely don’t want a guy like me running around free!

Here, I offer a guide for aspiring escorts on how to profit in the business. Actually, I’m amazed at how even-handed and insightful this article (which I wrote for my own very well-distributed magazine) truly was. Which is why I’m resurrecting it. A lot of my old crap is lame. This one ain't’ that bad!

Tired of busting that cashier job at Mickey D’s, Burger King or Food Fair? Had enough of commuting on crowded subways and then typing, pouring coffee, and generally getting sexually harassed by the boss all day?

Well, there’s a better way for a pretty girl with a couple of attractive body parts to earn a handsome living. It takes a particular temperament and personality to enter the fray for sure. But a girl who’s ready to smile and laugh for every Tom, Dick, and Harry can earn an enormous amount of money in the trade.

PREREQUISITES: What does it take to become a successful escort?

Clearly, physical beauty is very important in “the game.” A pretty face could possibly be a working girl’s number one asset. The industry boasts many awesome bodies…but not as many fabulous faces. So if an applicant is very beautiful — or even cute, she’s on her way to the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.

Following right behind as a close second is a beautiful chest. Guys love hooters. as much or more than any other body part. And a significant third is a big, juicy round booty. Then gorgeous legs…and hair etc. It goes on and on. Men are programmed to like it all. That’s how mother nature keeps the earth populated.



Almost as important as her physical appearance is the girl’s personality and attitude. Escorting is like sales. Having a winning way about dealing with client — and accommodating their needs and wishes — is paramount. The guys who are handing you their money want to feel loved and appreciated. Treat them like shit and only those who crave abuse will return.



Having the correct frame of mind really speaks to your longevity in the business. Most girls are not proud to be escorts. Society frowns upon the career. If you can get to the point where you don’t care what people think…to the point where you show your face in the paper and on the internet…and finally to the point where you thumb your nose at convention and simply flaunt all the money you’re making…then you’ve really arrived.

Escorting is a form of rebellion. Deciding on the profession makes this statement: Men (or a man) have deprived me of my dignity…and my innocence. I can lie down and cry like a wussy…or I can fight back! The sorry truth is that most girls who enter this occupation have been defiled at an early age. They’re angry about their lost innocence and need an outlet to express their anger and a peer group within which to flourish.

An escort service or an incall is a perfect subculture for self-help and therapy. Everybody there has been through what you’ve been through and is doing what you’re doing. It’s sad that most girls don’t recognize the value of these impromptu ready-made T-groups, as the great majority would rather not face their issues. Having said that, I really feel that entering this line of work could help a torn and confused but sensitive girl exorcise her demons and get on with her life while she makes a substantial amount of money in the process.



THE REWARDS

Beyond the obvious (all the money you can make), escorting can give a woman some keen insight into the male psyche and ego. It won’t take long before your understanding of the male animal will grow exponentially as you deals with men and their deepest and darkest secrets several times a day. Sometimes it will get disgusting and depressing. But remember…you’re getting compensated handsomely for your aggravation. View yourself as a psychiatrist (you’ll be making as much or more as the average shrink) and it will help get you through the day. Appreciate all the insight the job provides rather than getting depressed about all the freaks and you’ll be a whole lot better off for it mentally.



Often, it’s a pipe dream…but not always. An escort can meet and marry a very wealthy guy in this business. I’ve seen it happen more than once. But don’t count on it! Just as in amateur life, it can be very difficult to find your perfect soul mate.

HOW TO WORK: Too Many Choices…Too Little Time



Once you’ve decided to start working, it’s important to understand that there are many routes to the promised land. Do I work incall or outcall? Day or night? For a boss or independently? Most girls who want to enter the industry haven’t a clue of how to go about it.

First, there’s the street. (Disclaimer: This story is almost 20 years old. Girls rarely work the street anymore. I include it as instructive of the olden days.) Not a good idea. There are too many cops, freaks, and pimps preying on naive escorts in this venue.

Street clients can be dangerous…not to mention the pimps who patrol the strolls. Working for a pimp who takes all your money in exchange for giving you lodging, make-up, weed etc. is generally a bad idea unless you need to be rescued from a very bad home life…or you’re just so dependent that you can’t do anything for yourself.

Of course in this day and age, pimping is not what it once was and the stereotype of the nasty, big black guy who beats the crap out of his ghetto hoochies doesn’t always apply. But sometimes it does. Be informed when you make your decisions.



Second, comes an incall, a place where clients come to see you. Incall functions as a sort of halfway compromise for escorts. Many don’t want to go to the expense of running their own ads, answering their own phones, or getting their own hotel rooms or apartments.

In this arrangement, the owner takes half the session money in exchange for running ads, hiring a phone girl and security guard, and renting an apartment. For many new jacks, this is the best way to work. Starting up can be expensive and scary. The downside to working incall is that in many ways, it’s like a job. You have a schedule to obey and fines to pay if you don’t. And of course, you can’t turn anybody down when you have a boss.

Third is outcall, an arrangement under which you commute to the client. Like with cab-driving, for every night shifter there’s a day-shifter. And with escorting, for every incall girl, there’s an outcall girl. It’s simply a matter of preference. Often girls don’t like outcall because they never know what kind of freak they could run into. Once held captive in a residence or hotel room, anything can happen to the unlucky woman who is dispatched to a bad client. With incall, the possibility of being hurt by a freak is much less. There are other girls and a security guard on the premises to hear your screams!



As with incall, escort agencies generally split the money 50–50 with the girls (unless there’s a driver involved) with the gratuity going to the girl only. On balance, Manhattan escort agencies charge more for an hour, but demand better-looking girls to command the higher fee. But that doesn’t mean that at twice the price, a Manhattan-based agency will give a client twice the quality.

What all this means is that the cheaper agencies get a lot more calls and an escort may very well earn more money working for a Brooklyn agency than she would with a Manhattan agency charging twice the price, simply because the inexpensive agency books so many more calls.

Manhattan agencies generally have their girls on-call and dispatch them via yellow cab in Manhattan or a hired driver for hinterland calls. The Brooklyn and Queens agencies put two girls in a car for a shift with a driver speeding them to and fro from call to call. As a rule, girls who live in Manhattan work for Manhattan agencies…and girls who live in the outer boros work for outer boro agencies. But that doesn’t mean that you can’t commute for the sake of a better working situation.

And finally, we arrive at the independent route. Girls entering the business rarely take this option. They just don’t know enough or have enough money saved to get an apartment or a hotel room, and then advertise where they need to appear to attract clients.

But if you have some money, being an independent is definitely the way to go…and a route many girls with experience in the business eventually take. When you’re independent, you work when you want, charge what you want to charge, reject who you don’t want to see, and keep all the money you earn.

So there you have your options, girls. Escorting is what you make it. It can be a route to drug-addiction and depression. Or it could be your salvation, helping you find the man of your dreams, or at least providing you with much-needed cash to buy your mama that kidney she needs or send your son to private school. That’s up to you! Keep your head on straight and keep your eyes on your goals…and escorting could be your salvation…rather than your ruination!