Grateful Not To Attend Thanksgiving.
By: Lisa Martens
Tags: Thanksgiving, Humor, Family, Covid Diaries, Satire

Grateful Not To Attend Thanksgiving.

It’s sad sure…but also…liberating?

You get to live! Photo by Meelika Marzzarella on Unsplash

First, let me start out by saying there are a lot of things I enjoy about Thanksgiving. The parade is nice to watch on TV…you know, when I’m not in the back with the other women cooking. I think turkey tastes like napkins, like they said in Brooklyn Nine-Nine, but I do enjoy stuffing, cranberry sauce, and…don’t @ me for this…brussel sprouts.

But this year, I am grateful not to attend Thanksgiving. Here’s why:

I don’t have to defend my lifestyle.

I don’t make my aunts and uncles explain why they’re heterosexually married and have full-time government or corporate jobs. I don’t drill the stay-at-home moms over why they chose to have kids. I don’t pick apart their decisions. Nor do I “force” my lifestyle on them…I’m not making them help me swipe through Feeld.

Yet for some reason, whenever I’m at some holiday event, my life choices seem like fair game. Why don’t you ask people why they are getting married and having kids, instead of asking why I’m not?

Trump Supporter Relatives.

Totally fine with just, not dealing with them, and having peace and quiet instead. In fact, I can avoid the news all day as a mental health break for myself, and relish the fact that soon Trump will just me a retired man who lives in Florida who screams about how he should be president. That sounds great.

If I don’t have to do a family Thanksgiving, then I don’t have to be faced with the horrible choice of 1. Just ignoring what certain relatives say or 2. Trying to argue with them and ruining my whole day while not changing their minds anyway.

The emotional fallout.

Some people really like being around groups of people, and this time has been hard for them. But I don’t! Not really! And I don’t feel bad about…actually being okay with not having to be around huge groups.

Thanksgiving and Christmas are draining holidays for me. I have to psych myself up. I have to think of answers to questions that are intrusive. I have to decide to be kind…or snarky. And after, I have to emotionally recover from all of it. A lot of alone time. A lot of anxiety.

This year, I don’t have that pressure. I don’t have to second-guess my life decisions.

I don’t have to drink.

Holidays come with pressure to drink, and I’ve been doing a good job not drinking. And I feel better! I feel more clear headed. I’m enjoying sobriety. I’m not strictly sober, but I think at this point I’m having maybe, one or two drinks a month. And family parties usually involve polishing off

Not that I would “have to” drink if I went to a family party…but if I didn’t, people would speculate that I was pregnant. If I said I wasn’t, then something must be wrong. I guess I could just say I’m on a medication that doesn’t mix well with alcohol but let’s face it — When you aren’t drinking at social events, more often then not, you’ll get some kind of unwanted attention or commentary.

I’m helping by NOT socializing!

Big plus…I don’t have to do something that is draining, AND by not gathering, I’m helping save people’s lives. I mean, does this get any easier? I can eat carbs and brussel sprouts all on my own.

So this year, no turkey. No big groups.

Just me in a hammock writing blog posts.

Now…that’s something to be grateful for.