The Allure of the Bad Boy
By: Tara Blair Ball
Tags: Women, Relationships, Mental Health, Love, Psychology

Why do women love bad boys? Why did I?

1. You are an emotional adrenaline junkie.

Bad boys are always a little jittery, a little live-wirey, a lot unpredictable. You can hear the thunder, but never know where the lightning is going to strike.

The euphoria you get from them telling you that they love you or having sex with them is so intense that you crave it like an addict craves their next hit.

You want those highs so badly that you stick it out through the terrible lows, like when they aren’t calling, when you have a fight that was so bad it has you wondering whether it may or may not have been abuse.

Really, the lower the lows, the higher the highs feel, so to you, it’s worth it.

2. You know he has so much potential.

It’s always that fairy tale crap. You think he hasn’t met the right person. He’s listless, unfocused, drinks too much, doesn’t have the right job, and/or has some issues he needs to work out on a therapist’s couch.

What your ego tells you that he just hasn’t met you. You will be able to help him be the man you think he can be.

People who are afraid of commitment often attempt to commit to people who are inappropriate or unavailable. They choose them specifically because they subconsciously know a long-term relationship isn’t possible with them.

4. You’re ovulating.

I hate even writing that because it reads so incredibly sexist. Hormones are going to make women like bad boys?? But we are animals and thus are not immune to our bodies’ responses. In a study by Christina M. Larson and others, it was found that women are more attracted to “masculine” or “alpha” males during the ovulatory part of their cycle. The conclusion is that women (and other female animals) are drawn to “males with traits associated with fit genes that they can pass on to their offspring.”

In another study by Gregory Louis Carter and others, it was found that some men may have developed a “Dark Triad” personality as an evolutionary short-term mating strategy. The “Dark Triad” refers to men who exhibit narcissism, Machiavellianism, and psychopathy. Since women find “alpha” males more attractive during ovulation, they would inevitably be drawn to these Dark Triad figures who exhibit dominance, power, aggression, and assertiveness.

5. You’re young.

Sigal Tifferet and Daniel J. Kruger in their study surveyed 1,365 women, ranging in age from 14 to 68, about their preferences in a male partner. The women were asked to rate how likely they would be to have a long-term or short-term sexual relationship with a “dad” or “cad.”

Women generally preferred the “dad” type for a long-term partner and the “cad” for a short-term sexual affair. However, older women tended to prefer the “dad” type for all relationship lengths. Young women, in contrast, were more likely to consider brief sexual affairs, particularly with the cad.

The authors suggest that this effect might be due to changing fertility. Younger women may be more interested in securing “good genes” from attractive men, even if that means a short-term sexual affair. Older women, in contrast, may change focus away from sex and getting pregnant, toward securing good provisioning and resources for themselves and any existing children.