Who Said It? Donald J. Trump or Homer Jay Simpson?
By: Benedict Cosgrove
Tags: Politics, Humor, TV, The Simpsons, Donald Trump

It sometimes seems that Homer and that other oddly tinted guy share a single, profoundly incurious brain.

Donald Trump and Homer Simpson: Highly quotable brothers from another mother?

It can’t be easy going through life when most of the world sees you as a pathologically self-absorbed, often dangerous, not very bright cartoon. It can’t be easy being Homer Simpson, either.

But beyond Donald J. Trump’s and Homer Jay Simpson’s similar personality traits, intellectual abilities, physiques, and not-of-this-Earth skin tones, what the bumbling patriarch of 742 Evergreen Terrace and the current, very occasional occupant of the Oval Office have in common is a history of appearing almost exclusively on FOX and spouting memorable, head-scratching quotations.

In fact, it’s striking how closely so many of the things Homer has said through the years resemble things that Trump has said — and vice versa. While the 70-year-old obstructer-in-chief is old enough to be 39-year-old Homer’s elderly, thuggish, emotionally absent dad, it sometimes seems that the two share a single, profoundly incurious brain.

Here, in acknowledgement of two American TV icons — brothers from other mothers who have remained in the public eye for decades, despite possessing few discernible talents — we offer this little test: Which of the following were uttered by Homer Simpson and which were spoken, tweeted, or otherwise foisted on the public by Donald Trump?

You’ll find the answers after the quiz. Good luck, and Jebus help us all.

1. People can come up with statistics to prove anything. Fourteen percent of all people know that.

2. I feel like a supermodel — except, like, times 10.

3. Do you like girls that are 5-foot-1? They come up to you-know-where.

4. America’s health care system is second only to Japan, Canada, Sweden, Great Britain, all of Europe. But you can thank your lucky stars we don’t live in Paraguay.

5. We are especially thankful for nuclear power, the cleanest, safest energy source there is. Except for solar, which is just a pipe dream.

6. Ariana Huffington is unattractive, both inside and out. I fully understand why her former husband left her for a man. He made a good decision.

7. I’m the king of debt. I understand debt better than probably anybody.

8. You can’t keep blaming yourself. Just blame yourself once, and move on.

9. Facts are meaningless. You can use facts to prove anything that’s even remotely true.

10. TV respects me. It laughs with me, not at me.

11. Nuclear is powerful; my uncle explained that to me many, many years ago, the power and that was 35 years ago; he would explain the power of what’s going to happen and he was right. Who would have thought?

12. People die all the time, just like that. Why, you could wake up dead tomorrow.

13. Of course, everything looks bad if you remember it.

14. I’ve always wondered if there was a god. And now I know there is — and it’s me.

15. I actually have low blood pressure. Can you believe it? Can you believe it? I have, like, 100 over something.

16. I guess some people never change. Or, they quickly change and then quickly change back.

17. The sun? That’s the hottest place on Earth.

18. It takes two to lie. One to lie, and one to listen.

19. It’s freezing and snowing in New York. We need global warming!

20. Apologizing is a great thing, but you have to be wrong. I will absolutely apologize, sometime in the hopefully distant future, if I’m ever wrong.

21. The information superhighway showed the average person what some nerd thinks about Star Trek.



22. The concept of shaking hands is absolutely terrible, and statistically I’ve been proven right.

23. All normal people love meat…. You don’t win friends with salad.

24. Look at my African-American here!

25. Stupid risks make life worth living.

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Answers: 1) HS, 2) DT, 3) DT, 4) HS, 5) HS, 6) DT, 7) DT, 8) HS, 9) HS, 10) HS, 11) DT, 12) HS, 13) HS, 14) HS, 15) DT, 16) HS, 17) HS, 18) HS, 19) DT, 20) DT, 21) HS, 22) DT, 23) HS, 24) DT, 25) HS.