The persistence of “son preference” - incredible stories of two newly mothers in China.
By: Lucy Lu
Tags: Gender Equality, Tradition, Motherhood, China, Newborn

Gender inequality is a persistence issue. “Son preference” still dominates the family planning in China.

A mother-in-law said, “The baby is worthless!” after her daughter-in-law delivered a second girl to the family.

When a woman knew the newly-born baby is still a girl. She collapsed and went mad by herself. She cried and screamed, “I am sorry to my husband and mother-in-law. I am a bitch!”

Stories from ordinary people in China will help you understand the thousands of years old country better than those from stereotype comments and hardcore reviews.

Perhaps tradition is a good way to understand a country. Today, I want to introduce recent stories about one tradition of China, “son preference.” In other words, sex selection in favor of boys. It is not great, not splendor, and sometimes inhumane. It is only inundated with sorrow and helplessness.

In Chinese tradition, only the son can inherit the family. A family without a son means a cut off of the family.

“Son preference” has caused the gender imbalance in China’s population. According to an analysis by Global Times, In 2019, “the gender ratio among people aged 20–24 and 25–29 reached 114.61 and 106.65, respectively, indicating that at least one out of 11 men would not be able to get married with woman from same age groups.”

“Son preference” has caused issues in marriage and family planning. / Photo from www.irasutoya.com

Marriage is just one of the issues stemming from “son preference.” The post-marriage problem regarding gender inequality will continue.

Photo by Jimmy Conover on Unsplash

Husband and mother-in-law left when she gave birth to a baby girl

According to Chinese social media Weibo.com, a woman in Henan Province of China married a man and had a cute two years old daughter. It sounds like a perfect family life but in China, but there is a traditional concept many people in the outside world could not imagine.

Unfortunately, this concept is strongly recognized by the woman’s husband and mother-in-law. They always blame her for not delivering them a son.

One day, the woman got pregnant again. Both her husband and mother-in-law were very happy and were very solicitous to her. When the due day comes, however, not as their expectation, the new family member was still a girl.

The husband and mother-in-law could not accept this. They confirmed again and again with the nurse and doctor and nothing changed.

They were so disappointed. The mother-in-law said,

“The baby is worthless!” They then left the hospital, leaving the woman who just delivered a baby and even her two years old at the hospital!

The two years old daughter waited outside the door to watch her mother. When the mother came out with the baby, the doctor called the families. And the two years old girl walked towards them and tried to hold her mother’s hand.

A woman got mad after delivering a third daughter

There also has another similar story. According to the Chinese medical online forum DXY.cn, It’s about the third time a woman gave birth to the family. The former two kids are both girls. Her husband and mother-in-law also got the impenetrable tradition concept: son is the key for a family.

Photo by Aditya Romansa on Unsplash

During the time of her pregnancy, her husband and mother-in-law were very nice to her. They brought a lot of food to her. Hope she be healthy, for the potential son. It’s a hard night for the woman. The delivery process did not pass smoothly. With more than four times spinal anesthesia and so many pains and sufferings, the baby came, and it’s still a girl.

The husband and mother-in-law turned back to her and had nothing to say. When the woman knew this kid was still a girl.

She collapsed and went mad by herself. She cried and screamed, “I am sorry to my husband and mother-in-law. I am a bitch!”

Today we notice so many great accomplishments in China, fast-growing state economy, supertall skyscrapers, “the world’s factory,” to name a few. Nevertheless, perhaps nobody cares about the real life of ordinary Chinese people, especially vulnerable women.