5 things I Realized when I Became an Adult:
By: Diamond Jackson
Tags: Lifestyle, Growing Up, Life Lessons, Life, Adulting

1. You need to actually bring something to the table (emotions aside)

In the real world, I realized that a lot of people don’t genuinely care about your feelings. They want you to fulfill their needs.

Since I’ve started working in retail, it’s all about what you can bring to the table. Yes, you are rewarded every now and then but generally speaking, it’s what you can bring to the company that really matters. I had to sit with this fact which should be fairly obvious but for me, it just wasn’t.

I have feelings, I’m sensitive, I go through things, but the workforce doesn’t care about my petty excuses unless it’s a dire situation. So, keep that in mind when you decide to go into the job field. You have to suppress your genuine emotions (unless you enjoy the job), or be more optimistic, because believe me, I would’ve been fired a long time ago if I hadn’t changed my perception on working in retail.

Also, responsibility kicks in when you become an adult. Your parents may want you to start paying them rent since you might have passed their “moving out the house, threshold”.

My dad in particular wanted me to start paying him money to go towards bills. There’s nothing wrong with this, but it can be very inconvenient especially when you’re trying to save to move in New York City. I needed to start paying him, even though I didn’t want to due to making minimum wage, and still being within the mindset of only spending my money on what I want to spend it on.

Look at what you can bring to the table whether that be your career or your home life. Shit really isn’t free, nor easy, so if you want to be successful and reliable, you have to put your personal selfish needs aside and do what you have to do.

Note to self: This isn’t to say you suppress all of your emotions until you’re in a position that you’re comfortable with but you may have to put getting lit and hanging out with your friends a lot to the back burner until you are responsible enough to incorporate those things into your routine.

2. It can get very lonely

After I graduated high school, it was a lot harder for me to make friends. When you’re in school, you’re consistently around people within your age bracket, so you can easily find someone to vibe with for the most part.

Since I didn’t go to college, I had to make an actual effort to make different friends. This can mean meeting people through social media or at events. But with someone who has social anxiety, it’s not the easiest to put yourself out there.

Learn to be more outgoing and open to new potential, long-lasting bonds. It’s challenging but it can definitely pay off when you attract the right people.

3. Your parents will still treat you like a child until you fully have your own space

Your parents may tell you certain things that can be belittling at times. For example, I’m sure some of you have heard the famous “You’re not an adult until you aren’t living under my roof,”.

Also, another personal example, my dad still thinks it’s okay to tell me how to dress or how I should shave more, and when I should come home. I despise all of it but I know that it is something I have to tolerate until I get my own space.

But, sometimes all it takes is to set your boundaries even with your parents. Don’t feel guilty, I know I have but essentially I am my own person and if how I dress or hang out isn’t affecting the household, it shouldn’t matter. Set your boundaries!

4. Save Your Money!

Saving, saving, saving! It is very important if you actually plan to move out in a reasonable amount of time. Don’t buy stuff you know you will never use! Generally speaking, my advice to you is to try living a more minimalist lifestyle until you move out, so you’re not consistently spending money on items that take up more of your money and space.

Discipline yourself. Set a weekly budget.

5. Consistency is Key

If there is one thing that I’ve completely taken into account about growing up, it would be consistency. Consistency is key with anything that you do. This means being responsible, showing up everyday for work, and setting good habits.

I’ll be honest with you, I can be extremely lazy, so consistency was something I needed desperate help with. But I’ve learned that in order for me to genuinely manifest what I want, I have to be consistent with my goals and set good habits.

Einstein’s take on insanity: “Nothing changes, if nothing changes”

In other words you have to be the change you want to see. You have to put in the work, the time and the effort!