Radical self-care in the year of alignment — Life of an Empath
Tags: Alignment, Growth, Self Care, Change, Modern Spirituality

If there were ever a need for self-care, then 2020 would be the year to get in on it. Yes, the year is almost over, but what has the year of alignment taught us about ourselves? Our needs, our deepest truths?

Radical self-care for me is surrendering to the possibilities. To commit to extreme self-care, we must commit to change.

Change is the mitigating part of our existence. We mostly dismiss the obligation of change on our paths in hopes our circumstances change naturally, or our guilt about release fades to black. It doesn’t, and it won’t.

To surrender means we must be active in our thought and our energy. Our awareness is thereby creating the eminent action. We are radical in our pursuit of change for everything but ourselves. How do we stand for change in our leaders, in our justice system, in our mindset, if we don’t hold ourselves accountable for our personal growth first? Our external dynamic is but a mirror for who we are inside. Our existence is the sum of our collective consciousness.

Radical self-care might be purposeful if we didn’t consider self care a day at the spa. But, it is mostly pampering because to surrender, we must be responsible for who we are. Sadly we are rarely the energy we think we are. Our energy is dominant with fear, riddled with insecurity, and ruled by judgment.

What is self-care?

It is taking care of yourself in a way that feels authentic and provides comfort, stability, and refuge to your mind, body, and Spirit. Self-care must include an intention to connect to yourself more soulfully and mindfully.

Radical self-care should be about taking the time to understand who you are. I am fortunate enough to meet so many people on the journey to self-discovery, and it’s never how or what they imagine it to be. But that’s not where their commonalities end; the term” healing” comes up too often. More so than discovery, which I believe is such an odd stance on spirituality anyway. We must discover before we heal, and to learn, we have to activate our core beliefs surrender to the process. Our surrender must lead to the highest energy. We understand intellectually, maybe even soulfully, but we can’t. We choose not to do so. This act of surrender requires us to release our control, and we desire to examine, question, reject anything that needs us to do something in exchange for an intangible. We are so removed from our spiritual nature and overly immersed in our ego battles that it’s a miracle there is any of our spiritual essence left to access.

Why are we so mean to ourselves? How is it that we come to this incarnation taking on more negative traits rather than introducing more of our positive essence? Our refusal to surrender makes me wonder if we are worthy of the opportunity to grow soulfully? Is our real fear of organized religion the hellscape we earn with our evil deeds because we know that’s what we deserve? Maybe that’s genuinely why all come to me in fear of the inevitable judgment we all face upon our return.

Why do we deny ourselves the truth? I believe it is in the absence of the facts that we remain in control of the mess we create. As we journey farther away from ourselves in the ego, we create viable possibilities-the ones we don’t have to pray for or summon the universal energy to manifest for us. We develop options in the low swinging fruit. And when we have an opportunity to grow, we are simply too lazy to connect to anything higher because we have languished in a setting that doesn’t serve us so long. It becomes the place we never want to leave, the place we now draw our comfort.

Maybe we don’t surrender out of resistance, but free will. And in our interpretation of free will, we take pieces of the things we appreciate, the things we can withstand, our most superficial desires, and compile them, and that is our incarnated ecosystem.

But we also refuse to surrender because we need to be right. We must. If we are, our existence is lighter. We bear no guilt or shame. Our arrogance allows us to do horrific things to other people, beings, misguided plight to secure our comfort and independence.

If you neglect to put time and energy into yourself soulfully, you miss being present spiritually. The soul needs care, development, and refuge.

Consider this message I channeled about growth:

“ The growth that is constant and unchallenged is active. Movement and change are always a part of growth, evolution, and ascension. The immature soul is always fearful of making changes, and cling to the past, for even the present is already past tense in any incarnation. The evolved soul looks forward to changing, for it keeps the soul agile and ready for the next level of the journey. To be active in growth means to look for the opportunity to initiate it. However, those that are looking for a natural change or an agitator of growth will always be passive and lacking in abundance. Active growth reassures the soul of advancement, of the possibility to take on a higher form and be among the natural soul family. Any incarnation is limited; growth must be sought after and balanced with the circumstances to come into wisdom and to succeed in this state of being. Look for growth. It holds the key to ascension and opens the door to All That Is. You will know the warmth when you feel it, and the Light will be constant and welcoming. Your soul knows the way. The soul must always lead the journey. Rest your ego, and seek transformation.”

4 questions to activate growth

We misuse spiritual guidance and the opportunity to realize the specific type of growth we need as individuals. We don’t chiefly regard spiritual guidance as self-care. The miracle of spiritual guidance, particularly a modality like the Akashic Records, is that it can serve as the how-to manual for your particular energy needs. But, we are far more interested in what Brene Brown, Marie Forleo, or Glennon Doyle has to say rather than our spirit guides because this is the type of self-care we can control. We don’t want radical. We want an easy button.

Think about it, how concerned are you about what others read on their journey than what they are doing to make a change. People ask me all the time, “What should I be reading about this topic?” Or, “What do you do for self-care, Tonesha?” These are the days I almost question my commitment to helping others change. You understand I am merely mortal.

When you consider spirituality a lifestyle and spiritual guidance as to the roadmap for your journey, your mind should be thinking of the question to ask for the most straightforward answer. The guidance will give you direction and activate your growth.

Here are the questions you have to keep in your back pocket for all things on the spiritual journey:

How can I grow from this? How is my ego preventing me from moving forward? What is my current spiritual theme? What action can I take now to put me on the highest path?

These are the hard questions. Your answers are sure to lead you through your trauma, help you consider the actions you are avoiding, and most certainly relieve energetic blockages.

This is radical self-care.

If you are ready to embark on a soulful journey to the ultimate truths, harness light for the greater and universal good, then schedule some time with me , and let’s see if we can travel this road together.

And, check out these episodes of the Life of an Empath podcast:

Navigating Evolving Relationships Pt. 1

Surrendering the Intuitive Possibilities

Ancestry: The Ins and Outs of Perceived Identity