Day 24 — The Autumn’s Leaf. Have you ever felt so lonely like the…
By: Vaibhav Mehta
Tags: Life Lessons, Experience, Henngeadvent2020, Learning, Philosophy

Have you ever felt so lonely like the autumn’s leaf? Did you feel the pain that broke you emotionally? Made you mentally drained or spiritually dead? Ever wondered what you are doing with your life? Didn’t you feel like running away from everything and everyone for a moment? Yet you stay for your loved ones, for the people you care and you decide to smile physically and hide every emotion behind it. I had been through this and I know, someday, some of you will have or would have been through this tough season in life, the autumn.

Kyoto, 2020

Isn’t it so strange that autumn is beautiful, yet for some people, everything seems to be dying? To be frank, that’s not what I believe. Let me show you the brighter facet of this season. Did you ever notice how the trees do not cling to their leaves? Autumn is about releasing the old to make way for the new. It is about those days of your life where you should focus on leaving behind all your heartbreaks, past failures, and mistakes to carve a new way of success and contentment, to prove yourself to yourself, not to others. Always remember mistakes and failures should be your teacher, not your attacker. It is a lesson, not a loss. It is a temporary, necessary detour, not a dead end. The comeback is always more important than the setback. Some of us may think holding on to the past makes us strong, but the truth is sometimes it is letting go.

In the words of John Donne “No spring nor summer beauty such grace as I have seen in one autumnal face”, and I believe this to be true. If you ask me, autumn in life is nothing but life’s second spring. It is those dark moments of life in which we must focus to see where the light is. You can get your shadow only when you are under the sun, in the same way, if you want to make an impression of your life so that you will be remembered for good for a long time, you must work hard and mold yourself to be a better person than you were yesterday. Anyone can run away. It is damn easy. Facing problems and working through them, that’s what makes you strong. Embrace, evolve, experience, and explore your life. As in the end, life is a precious gift. It is a journey through all seasons no matter how bad the roads or accommodations are. Life should be an adventure, don’t you think so? Embrace this autumn as an etching spring for a better summer of your life.

You may say to me “Dude, stop giving me gyaan or a sermon, what have you been through in your life? It is easy to tell these fancy things when you have faced nothing in life” But dear friend, I have been through everything, and trust me when I am saying this it is from the experience and the truth which I am sharing. Someone once said ‘Wise man always learns from other’s experience as when life teaches you, it is the toughest way to learn’. Are you wise enough? Now, if you allow me, let me just distract you for a moment and show you one of the glimpses of my life which had a great impact on me positively

And it was autumn for me, I was shattered by the thoughts and agony in it not knowing whom I should consult or talk to? For though we live in the world, sometimes all you want is to lie in your bed, cry a bit, and hope to fall asleep before you fall apart. With these thoughts in mind, I decided to escape for a while. Yes, you heard it right. I went to a BEACH, as in, the BEACH is the Best Escape Anyone Can Have; right? This beach was near my university in Japan and I must say one of a kind. The water was so blue and clear that I could see my reflection in it. There was sand everywhere, the water was cool and the waves were lapping around with a rhythmic sound and I could also hear the sound of gushing winds. It was mid-noon and you can see the horny boatman, flying fishes, couples hanging around, and kids playing on the coast, in short, I was on a beautiful yet interesting beach. Tired of walking, I saw an empty wooden bench and in no time I ran towards it so that I could reserve the whole bench for myself. I was gazing around and waging war on my thoughts, just then I happened to see a cute little 5-year-old kid trying to construct a sandcastle. I could clearly see the passion and determination in her eyes and the creativity with which she was doing it. She noticed that I was watching her but yet she wasn’t bothered and was doing her job. It was almost sunset then, what I see was an amazing sandcastle not less than an artifact, I must say. After hours of pain, she did it and it looked magical. She looked at me again, smiled, and walked away as if she was telling me “Look, I did it”. I was amazed by her confidence and perseverance. As soon as I started to head back home, her magical sandcastle was washed away by the tides in a few seconds. I was saddened for a while but unbothered by it, I just came back home. The next day while returning from the university, I saw her again constructing the castle with the same passion but at the same place. So I thought I should give her my civil engineering advice and suggest a better spot so that her castle survives at least for a day. I stopped by and I told her in my broken Japanese “Kid, this is not a good place as in the evening your castle will be washed again by those tides and your efforts will be of no use”. I guess she was a stubborn girl. She behaved as if she didn’t even notice me and chose to avoid me. She didn’t even utter a single word. But I clearly felt what she told me in her actions. I guess she was telling me ‘Go away and Just mind your own business’.

Photo by Courtney Hall on Unsplash

While she left the beach, I saw her castle coming down again in no time by those tides but today I wasn’t sad but happy as she didn’t listen to me and I thought at least tomorrow she will acknowledge me for my good advice. Still the next day, the girl was stubborn enough to do what she was doing and the day after as well. I thought she was doing it intentionally to make me angry, and guess what, I was angry and provoked. One fine day, I decided to confront her firmly and I asked, “Hey kid, Can you tell me why are you doing this time and again? Can’t you see your castle washes away every day? Do you have a problem with me?” After minutes of silence and showing pity towards me She pointed out her finger towards the setting sun and calmly said, “Do you see that small orange ball?” I said, “Yes, so what does it has to do with this?”. “If it can come up again after drowning in water every day, why can’t a sandcastle every day?”, she replied innocently. I was awestruck by those words, she might have shown her innocence in it, but for me, it was a lifelong lesson.

What I learned was, sometimes things and situations won’t go as you desire and wish it to be. Even after giving your hundred percent, you may not be able to score the marks you want in your academics. You may not be able to get your desired job. After hours of training, you might lose some battles. Sometimes, you may lose some loved ones in the middle of your life. At times you may also miss your own self in this race of life. In those situations and times, don’t give up because there will be a lot of people out there who want you to give up this race and see you lose. When you lose faith in yourself, remember that there are some people who never did, nor ever will. Don’t let your past haunt your present. Show your tough situations of life how strong your conviction is. Inspire others so that when they look at you they should say ‘It is because of you I don’t give up’. Don’t quit, get up and win this race like the autumn’s leaf which is trying to convey something to you –

“I transformed my colors, To be recognized as a flower, In every change, in every falling, There is some pain, some beauty, Don’t wish it were easier, Wish you were better, Life doesn’t need to be perfect, When it can be made beautiful, Feel the hope that’s in the air, I look at that bright sky and conceive Now, it is time for me to leave, Leaving all the things and the drift Yet, gracefully, as I knew Life is a gift..

Also, Be like the Christmas Tree,

Evergreen and shining, full of lights,

Full of gifts… For others…”