endless quarantine
By: Ally Weng
Tags: Quarantine, Quarantine Diaries, Quarantinelife, Lockup, Covid Diaries

endless quarantine

The end of 2020 brings an opportunity to reflect on this once-in-a-century event, which will be remembered as a moment when everything changed, and I promised myself to write a quarantine diary, turning out, I did, and I didn’t.

I did write and speak some of my thoughts via personal social media and zoom meetings to share with some of my friends, my limited support bubbles, which I am truly appreciated, but I don’t know how to arrange, collect, and organize all of them into a whole piece yet, the feelings are complicated and twisted sometimes…

I did learn a thing or two during this precious quarantine stay, and I am absolutely glad that we made it anyway, otherwise, I won’t ever be able to experience, to learn all these lessons in this practical way. Tomorrow would be the day to get out legally, but you see how fortunate I am: I feel I can keep doing this for a much longer time, living in a 2-floor flat with total 16-step stairs, a wonderful grey-and-yellow-toned spacious space, a few big windows, a sizable airy balcony, a higher ceiling of a typical elder building in this city…, most importantly, my dearest U-san, aka Mr. UberEat who accompanies us 24/7 with various delicious food choices so that I ask no more, if I never do this quarantine in this surreal 2020, I will never know my potential of being limited in such locked-up. I have to say that human beings do have unlimited potential especially at emergent time, and I believe I won’t forget this whole journey for the rest of my life, locked-up at Haneda Airport one night first and then followed by the longer quarantine life.

Christmas was just past by, and I watched Queen’s speech from Youtube thousands of miles away, “for many, this time of year will be tinged with sadness: some mourning the loss of those dear to them, and others missing friends and family-members distanced for safety, when all they’d really want for Christmas is a simple hug or a squeeze of the hand. If you are among them, you are not alone, and let me assure you of my thoughts and prayers. The Bible tells how a star appeared in the sky, its light guiding the shepherds and wise men to the scene of Jesus’s birth. Let the light of Christmas — the spirit of selflessness, love, and above all hope — guide us in the times ahead. It is in that spirit that I wish you a very happy Christmas.”

… as well as I watch local news on a daily basis here, some could be close to witch-hunting, stigmatized,… to generate a pretty stressful and scared atmosphere, encourage neighborhood-watch to monitor this society altogether in order to keep it as a most likely virus-free space but still, some people have to pay a different price.

Again, I am grateful to be able to experience very different ways in this weird Covid-2020 in different cities… in such difficult times, mental and physical health couldn’t be more critical.

I know we will keep eating well, sleeping well, doing workouts regularly, and supporting each other like we always do, and I would rather like to believe that things will get better in the near future. Like Oto-san said: wait patiently and look forward to a better year to come…

People say the key to happiness lies in knowing how to do two things: cherishing & letting go. “Everything depends on the individual human being, regardless of how small a number of like-minded people there are, and everything depends on each person, through action and not mere words, creatively making the meaning of life a reality in his or her own being.” — Ally 2020.12.27

Covid-19, social distancing, hands, face, space, facemask, infection, vaccine… It has been a blizzard and unforgiven year of 2020. We are fortunate enough to stay healthy and live a relatively “normal” life, obviously with the help of many unsung heroes; all the health care and essential worker. Everyone has been forced to take a hard look at what is essential in life.

Without saying, the year can not be done without going through a 14-day mandatory quarantine, something we never thought we can do it. People adapt and I guess we manage to go through it and we will be able to step outside our apartment for the first time in 2 weeks. We are lucky enough to stay in a spacious and lovely 2-story flat with a high ceiling, plenty of stairs, and a flowery balcony; delivery is quick and easy and so many to choose from. Can’t imagine how difficult it must be for anyone to go through the 14 days with a lesser condition. but after all, a luxury prison is still a prison and freedom is one of the most treasured qualities in society.

Covid-19 really puts the entire global to a test, to what we believe to a test; clearly, For many reasons, some countries manage relatively well with fewer deaths, and some countries suffer tens of thousands of losses. To defeat such a difficult invisible enemy, there is no doubt we are all forced to sacrifice one way or the other, whether we realize it or not. To lose a loved one is unimaginably painful, and to be forced to die alone without the loved ones aside is unbearable. At one point or another, we have been forced to make such a difficult decision, with the intention to reduce the infection and control the virus.

I always thought the lockdown in March by the UK was a bit late, but when it is introduced, it really tried to balance the infection control with people’s mental/physical well being and maintain some freedom to breathe fresh air in the park, and to exercise, and to chat with someone in distance. To help reduce loneliness and improve mental health, social support bubble was introduced later on. While it’s true that the deaths are many and there are many things to be criticized, looking back it is really a strangle between culture, freedom, society, and self-regulation. Applaud the NHS every Thursday at 8;00 pm; celebrate a patient recovered from a long struggle in the ICU and many inspiring stories.

Taiwan did exceptionally well in the infection control since Jan. Even as many countries are facing a winter spike in the infection and a new variant that may be more susceptible to children, Taiwan seems to be able to maintain a really normal life. This is by no means an easy task and people in Taiwan should be proud of what they are able to accomplish, with many government and local officials put up the plan for infection control, people in Taiwan also did their part. However, with such a success, it’s unclear people do appreciate what they have sacrificed, willingly or unwillingly. Because Taiwan did so well, it almost becomes intolerable to a new case number at the press conference. It’s not clear if people forget about compassion for those infected, even worse criminalize those who are infected; The mandatory quarantine and self-health regulation are obviously imposed to protect public health, but it is by no means trivial and it is not a given; how many people ever imagine to be locked up in a room without any wrongdoing for 14 days; how many people truely concern about the well-being of those who are quarantined for public health. With such success, how many people knowingly or unknowingly start discriminating based upon the origin of travel; starting to judge one may be more superior than the other.

Tomorrow we will step outside our apartment for the first time, and we are our own social support bubble. “the situation could have been worse”, as my neighbor wisely said. the Queen’s Christmas speech echos with us, “The difficult year necessarily kept people apart, but brought us closer; …, bring kindness to the stranger; … let’s show care and respect for all”. The Queen’s speech in April still resonates with us,

“We will meet again!”

— Alex 2020.12.27