This Mama Loves Pacifiers
By: Refilling The Glass I Knocked Over
Tags: Family, Baby, Parenting, Baby Care, Baby Products

Working with children in daycares and having two of my own, has taught me a lot of different skill sets and a lot about baby “stuff.” Some of the questions I get asked most frequently are about pacifiers. Should they use them? What brand should they use? Are they a terrible habit? When should they stop using them? How do you get them to stop using them? The list goes on and on. Here’s my short answer, I LOVE PACIFIERS!!! I love them because they pacify babies! It’s literally in the name. All joking aside I highly recommend pacifiers to any parent because trying to sooth a baby either by breast, by bottle, or by thumb sucking is exhausting for both mommy and baby.

Pacifiers are a wonderful invention. They help to sooth the baby and mommy. I couldn’t sooth by nipple, mine were so sore, and so sensitive, that even breast feeding was a struggle until about three months. Having a pacifier that I could give after feedings, or that Dad could give to help calm the baby really helped.

Deciding on giving your baby a pacifier is completely up the parents, and I am in no way telling you that you have or should use them. That is a personal choice. However if you do decide to use them, there are some really great brands and choices to choose from. Tommy Tippee has several different designs and choices, I loved the closer to nature product line. (Along with their bottles). https://www.amazon.com/Tommee-Tippee-Closer-Nature-Pacifier/dp/B07S9GYFTY/ref=sr_1_2?crid=3KCMQHT9HI8R2&dchild=1&keywords=tommy+tippy+pacifier&qid=1586493697&sprefix=tommy+tippy%2Caps%2C195&sr=8-2

Phillips Avent pacifiers also have great choices. https://www.amazon.com/Philips-Avent-Pacifier-months-SCF212/dp/B076QGMCFP/ref=sxin_4_ac_d_rm?ac_md=5-3-cGFjaWZpZXIgNi0xOCBtb250aHM%3D-ac_d_rm&cv_ct_cx=pacifier&dchild=1&keywords=pacifier&pd_rd_i=B076QGMCFP&pd_rd_r=cd83dddb-05b8-43ed-8428-8952e01b433a&pd_rd_w=NipmO&pd_rd_wg=FSAZq&pf_rd_p=96e196e3-02fe-420a-8e27-9285fc9434dd&pf_rd_r=SDVBFXT4139CJ1EMVHAG&psc=1&qid=1586493964&sr=1-4-12d4272d-8adb-4121-8624-135149aa9081

They both have clip handles, so that no matter what kind of pacifier clip you have, they work with them. (Pacifier clips are also a great tool, because they keep the pacifier attached to the babies clothing and not falling out of the carseat or their mouths).

The only kind of pacifier I do NOT recommend are the kind that have a stuffed animal attached to them. I get the appeal, they are cute, very easy to find and the baby at about 4 to 6 months can start to grab the stuffed animal to put the pacifier into their mouth. When the child is older, and they are on the go, they have a stuffed animal with them all the time. All great things, except that those are not lite weight stuffed animals. I am not a doctor or dentist but having a stuffed animal hang from your mouth as you grow new teeth doesn’t seem like the best idea. Not to mention that gravity continuously pulls down that stuffed animal and causes the child to suck harder on the pacifier. All things that are bad for the teeth, the ears and throat.

Now that you’ve chosen a brand of pacifier, remember this, you might want to get several different kinds, because your baby is really the one who is going to choose which one they like the most. Once they do have a preference, get a few in that kind. There is nothing worse then getting somewhere with your baby and realizing you don’t have their favorite pacifier. I didn’t want my first child to have a preference, so I gave him all different kinds of pacifiers and it worked like a charm. Every baby is different, so this method may or may not work for you. Follow your babies lead, they’ll let you know, loudly, which one they prefer.

Sometimes parents will protest about how awful the pacifier is and how hard it is to get the child to stop using it. Again, this is a personal choice and I am in no way trying to tell you how to pacify your child. I will share an experience I had with one family who had a very bad view of the pacifier. They were adamantly against them, and they were very happy that their little one loved sucking their thumb. They didn’t have to hurry and give the baby a pacifier, or get up to retrieve one in the middle of the night. They never had to worry about it falling out of the carseat or the toddler dropping it and putting it back in their mouth. That is, until they realized you can’t take away the child’s thumb, like you can a pacifier or favorite blanket. By the time their child was two and half they realized they had a major problem on their hands because they couldn’t get their toddler to stop sucking their thumb. I’m in no way blaming them, I’ve seen children who use a pacifier, a blanket to suck on and their thumbs. Every child is different, just don’t be afraid to talk with their pediatrician about breaking the thumb sucking habit before there is permanent damage to their teeth.

When should you take away the pacifier? Honestly, the best time is around a year old. Will it be difficult, yes. Will it be worth it in the long run, yes! I have found that weaning the child over a few weeks, form the pacifier has worked the best. Start by taking it away for daily use. That means, only use it for the car, naps, and night time sleeping. No more all day wearing the pacifier. Go on a hunt for all the pacifiers in your house. I guarantee you, that your child knows where they are and they will look for them and ask for them. If your child is in daycare, they can’t have a pacifier once they are 1 years old, unless they are sleeping. I have helped many toddlers break the habit of needing a pacifier at school, only to have the parent give it to them immediately upon pickup. Often times without the child even asking for it. At this point, is the pacifier for them or for you?

Next, you will need to remove the pacifier from the car seat. This is by far is one of the hardest times, because they use it to fall asleep in the car. Honestly, it’s a game changer. Once they figure out how to let the motion of the car sooth them, they don’t need the pacifier to fall asleep (this translates later when you remove it from their crib). After about 2 weeks of not having a pacifier in the car, remove it from nap time. Depending on your child, they may not even notice because they’ve gotten used to not having it for naps in the car. After about a week, you can move on to the final steps.

This is IMPORTANT, take your child out of the house, to some place stimulating for them and do NOT give them the pacifier. It doesn’t exist. If you want this to work, you have to be diligent about not giving in to the temptation of handing them the pacifier. My final step is a two part process. While out with my toddler we didn’t give him the pacifier. He was a bit fussy to fall asleep in our arms but he eventually did. All the noise and being in an unfamiliar place, really helped to distract him from missing the pacifier.

Once we got home and it was time for bed, I wanted to see if he would ask for the pacifier (mind you I had already removed it from his crib-this is VERY important). Out of sight, out of mind. He didn’t look for it, and I didn’t ask if he wanted it. Having already fallen asleep without it for naps, car rides, and earlier that day, he didn’t need it. After he fell asleep, I threw away ALL of the pacifiers!!

This is a step you cannot change. You have to THROW AWAY ALL OF THE PACIFIERS!!! If you don’t do this, and your child has a rough night, maybe two to three nights into this process, you might be tempted to give in. You think, well it’s 3 am and I am exhausted, what harm will it do? None, it will do no physical harm, except that now, your toddler knows that if they throw a hard enough tantrum, that you will give in. Yes, toddlers figure that out very quickly. It’s harder to break the habit of a pacifier that you go back and forth about giving them. If it’s in the trash, maybe even the outside trash, you’re less likely to go rummaging through it to give it to them.

The reasons I say to stop the pacifier around 1 are because the age is more agreeable. The older they are, the more they cling to it. They can’t have it in daycare except for naps, and at two they discouraged from having them at all. It’s also not good for their teeth, which by one they have a majority of them and any object in the mouth repeatedly, will ruin their teeth formation.

Pacifiers are a great tool. They help the baby to sooth themselves and give you and them some much needed sleep. At around one years old, it’s time to say goodbye to that wonderful tool and allow them to self sooth with their favorite blanket, bed time story, or nightlight. Best of luck, and remember, we’re all in this mommy business together. Let’s be kind to one another and help, instead of shame.