The Station Wagon and Family Turmoil
Tags: Station Wagon, Divorce, Fatherless Children, Family Turmoil

The Station Wagon and Family Turmoil

I had a friend remark to me recently that she would never drive a minivan. I love minivans! They are very useful, especially if you have kids. They are much more useful than those old family cars of the 70’s — station wagons.

I am not picky about what I drive, I am more concerned with the vehicle getting me to where I want to go, but I guess I would prefer not to drive a big, cumbersome, gas guzzling station wagon.

A few days ago, I was driving home, and as I passed a driveway, I spotted a big old 1970’s era station wagon. I guess I have not seen one of those in a while, because I somehow noticed it.

Then I let out a big laugh. About twenty years ago, my sister was in the Coast Guard, and she and her husband, Neal lived in several places all over the world — California, Puerto Rico, Alaska, Guam…

It was in one of those places that Neal, who was not in the military, decided he wanted a car of his own. He just needed something cheap that would take him around town on errands.

My family was chuckling when we found out that this good looking guy in his twenties was driving around in a big old station wagon. It was not that we were being materialistic, we just found it funny. I would have done the same thing, if a station wagon was all I could find to drive.

I had a good laugh, thinking of Neal cruising around in a big, old station wagon. As I continued on my drive home, my laughter dissipated, and I suddenly felt a little sad.

Neal and my sister went on to have two children, both boys, then fight, separate, fight some more, and finally divorce. Neal went back to his native New York state, while my sister took the kids and ended up in Hawaii, where she retired from the Coast Guard.

Neal has not seen the kids since they were babies. He does not have a relationship with them, because the parents won’t get along. It is very sad, as every child needs two parents.

Why does it have to be this way? Why can’t people find the good in life, the things to laugh at, the things that bring smiles to our faces? Why can’t we concern ourselves with making others happy, instead of constantly demanding our own way?

I know a lot of people, and sadly, most seem to come from families with much dysfunction. I really do believe dysfunction is way more prevalent than love, as I hardly know any loving families, but I know plenty of unloving, dysfunctional ones.

I used to work for a family whose three grown daughters hated each other so much, they did not even want to be around each other. Where does such feelings originate? Shouldn’t parents be developing love among their children, not discord?

I know of several families where the parents actively turn their kids against one another, yet try to seem innocent of any wrongdoing. They then stand around, wondering why nobody gets along.

I grew up in that very same way, yet I have no desire to continue the dysfunction. I have pets, not children, but I did a very good job of getting them to love one another. Now, I have dogs, cats, chickens and a pet goat, and all are respectful of one another, and a few are even affectionate with each other.

It is all very sad, all of the lost relationships, the what-could-have-beens…and for what?

Life would be much happier for everyone if people decided to get along and respect one another. We could all be positive and happy, and enjoy things such as laughing at big, old station wagons.