Leadership: Empathic Listening
By: C.C Achukwu
Tags: Leadership, Leadership Development, Empathy, Listening, Management And Leadership

Stephen .R. Covey in his classic, The 7 Habits Of Highly Effective People, describes a concept known as “empathic Listening”.

“The essence of empathic listening is not that you agree with someone; it’s that you fully, deeply, understand that person, emotionally as well as intellectually” he said.

He also buttresses that it means “reflecting what a person feels and says in your own words to their satisfaction so they feel listened to and understood.”

The central idea here is that listening empathically is primarily concerned with not merely hearing, but with listening with faculties including the mind, eyes and heart — all with the intent to understand. As opposed to listening with the intent to reply.

The difference makes for a huge deal.

In listening with the intent to reply, one hears, analyzes and is conjuring up rejoinders. No real understanding of the words spoken from the communicator occurs because mental functions were busied with formulating responses.

Conversely, in listening with the intent to understand, the functions that curate responses are temporarily suspended so that fuller attention can be given to making real meaning out of what the speaker says.

Here, the listener does his/her best to get on the same page as the speaker; to come into tune with the emotions of the words spoken and to get into the rhythm of the speaker’s heart. Understanding, in many ways, is the end and not merely the means.

When leaders learn to listen empathically, what becomes of the organization?

Higher levels of trust between leaders and their people are engendered which may promote intensified cooperation. People feel respected and appreciated which may foster greater involvement in the organization’s affairs. A demonstrated inclination/openness on the leader’s part to act on relevant suggestions may spur greater contributions of ideas, thereby rapidly improving the supply of inbred innovation.

And the sensed proclivity to act on the recommendations of lower-level colleagues is of paramount importance to them.

An employee of a certain firm once told me that she had stopped making suggestions at meetings because her ideas were almost always never taken seriously. Even worse, she felt that a good number of her colleagues shared the same sentiments.

If truth be told, it then becomes apparent that leaders do not know about the various functional nuts and bolts of the organization like to people who are closest to them — the functional employees.

For instance, the leader does not, on average, know about the precise condition of the customer as much as the frontline employee does. The people who are closest to the issue usually have the best practical idea solutions to some of the most pressing concerns.

So if efforts are mounted to encourage these frontline teams to openly share and communicate suggestions, without the felt propensity to act on the best ideas put forward, that smoke eventually fizzles out. Hardly anyone will be motivated to continue to contribute ideas that almost always meet resistance.

Employees need to feel that their ideas are worthy, at least, of being really listened to.

In conclusion, empathic listening is a win for the leader, for the organization and for the people.

The leader continually has new assortments of perspectives with which to operate, the organization as a whole may receive a higher influx of innovative efforts, while the people may experience a higher notch of satisfaction.

The responsibility of empathic listening on the leader’s part is thus threefold:

One is creating a conducive environment which supports the free flow of information, suggestions and ideas.

Two is the continuously refined skill and discipline of listening with the intent to understand, rather than to quip out seemingly clever little rejoinders.

Three is the demonstrated proclivity or bias for quick implementation of the most potent ideas.

Not every idea will be implemented for sure, but people ought to feel that their suggestive contributions merit some real attention at least.

All three, done effectively, may go a long way in enhancing the quality of rapport and engagement between the leader and his/her people, thus improving the organization’s apparatus as a whole.

C.C Achukwu is the author of ‘Touching The Nerves Of Leadership’, a book designed to help leaders to become more inspiring in order to elicit improved involvement and performance from their people. He is open to delivering keynotes, talks and running workshops for your organization that are centred around leadership development and personal development. Visit ccachukwu.com or uppist.com to find out more. Email him at cc@uppist.com.