Aggretsuko and society’s dangerous love of stalkers
By: Antonia Bawden
Tags: TV

Recently I decided to watch the Netflix original “Aggretsuko” an anime with 15 minute long episodes following Retsko, a cute red panda and her daily tackles of ignorance which she screams in karaoke.

I don’t work in an office, but it’s relatable to be intimidated by bosses and looked down upon because you need to “work up the ladder”. Many times I have ended up in a toilet cubicle crying on the phone, then guiltily return red eyed to work. Being naive and sensitive to criticism is not a good mix.

So, I binged watched Aggretsuko in three days, at first it was in the background to do my work with, then I started to pay attention and now I love it. I questioned why none of her co workers decided to stick up for her when she was bullied by her literal pig boss Ton. Or why she let her Mum boss her around and let herself in her apartment with no invitation. Retsko is a shy girl with no boundaries, and it’s unfortunate that the whole world wants to step all over her.

Now by the time I watched season 3, I was disappointed by her decision to go back to work and return to her normal “dispensable” accounting job. Retsko deserves a break, and Tadano was the perfect match – apart from their future plans. Only, I agreed with him. Marriage sounds like an outdated concept and surely it won’t fix anything in a relationship. I can’t help it to rub me the wrong way when women highly prioritise it.

It is a little girl’s dream is to end up “happily ever after” because of love. However, It’s entirely possible to devote your love without a government contract. Other than marriage, deciding to have children is a perfectly good dealbreaker in my opinion, so I don’t blame Retsko for putting her foot down in that respect.

Season three was dark and had a bittersweet ending following Retsko who owes a huge debt to a manager of a idol group. Of course she keeps this a secret, and puzzlingly, doesn’t tell her friends . Furthermore getting herself deeper in the mess, her “death metal” is overblown by the manager and decides to put her in the group to become essentially Babymetal.

It’s a positive change in her life at first, and we watch her self esteem blossom, she is appreciated for her talent, and for the first time in her life she doesn’t feel “dispensable”. Unfortunately she falls prey into the trap of Japan’s idol life. Reminiscent of “Perfect Blue” , the last couple of episodes show that Retsko’s life is threatened by an obsessive stalker who doesn’t appreciate her addition to the group. Not only this, but Haida, a friendly co worker in love with Retsko decides to follow her and doesn’t feel like she is letting him into her life, but is only concerned…

He follows her lead and even takes a last minute plane, and follows her to a concert without confrontation. Yes, my creepometer was triggered. I liked him until those last couple of episodes. My dude, she rejected you a while ago, and there you received clarity. Others (mostly men) think of this as an act of devotion because media has told us that, eventually a woman will see the nice guy if he hangs around.

Is this a trope? Because I hate it. The reality is, it is scary for women to not have our rejections taken seriously, and you end up putting her on a pedestal she didn’t ask to be on.

My sister about 16 had her “first” stalker an older 20 year old boy she talked to on Instagram ,whom found her location without asking her. She was traumatised when he told her he decided to visit the area and found my account to communicate to give him a chance. She checked under her bed for a while and was in fear of the guy driving up to her house. To her, it was a terrifying ordeal, to him it was romantic and a sign of devotion despite her telling him to back off. Why have both me and my sister experienced online stalking despite polite declinations? Because it is a social norm?

Another popular Netflix show “You” reminded me of this issue, and the phenomenon is created where the main predator was sympathised by the viewers, despite ending several characters with his obsessive devotion. Can we stop creating sympathy for men who won’t accept no? Stalking isn’t a game, and a relationship deserves to have an equal amount of love on each side. Stalking is for chumps, man or woman, stop doing it and respect other people’s boundaries! You don’t know the object of your dreams, face it.