Don’t We All Have Imposter Syndrome?
By: Samantha Kemp-Jackson
Tags: Life Lessons, Doubt, Life, Self, Work

Fake it Till You Make It?

There’s a lot of talk about “Imposter Syndrome” lately.

You know — the feeling that you’re not really up to the title/role/position that you’re in, and that you’ll be found out any day now.

It seems to creep up on us at the most inopportune of times:

During an important presentation at work

During a public speech or appearance where you’re the centre of attention

Anytime you’re given accolades related to your work, role or position

Imposter Syndrome is both irrational and completely rational at the same time.

Imposter Syndrome is both irrational and completely rational at the same time.

On the one hand, it makes no sense that the external appreciation and confirmation shown regarding one’s ability is questioned by the recipient of such praise. On the other hand, it’s completely understandable that any of us would have a question about whether what’s being said about us is really true.

Who is that person that they’re talking about? Oh — it’s me! But it doesn’t sound like the person that I know I truly am inside. I’m a sham and a fraud.

Photo by Gift Habeshaw on Unsplash

We’re All Scared, Deep Down

The thought process surrounding praise is a curious one, to be sure. There are few of us who have the intestinal fortitude, the unwavering strength and the steely self-awareness that can easily accept the accolades received.

For the rest of us, it’s just embarrassing.

It’s untrue what they’re saying about me.

It’s a fraud.

I’m a fraud.

It’s those constant choruses of self-doubt that permeate our minds often and sadly put a damper on any hope of acceptance.

Acceptance of the fact that, to the outside world, we’re doing okay. In fact, better than okay. That’s why we’re getting the praise.

It’s a curious thing, praise.

It’s what we all crave and yet, there are so many of us that are uncomfortable when it’s realized.

It’s almost as if accepting our due — regardless of the fact that it’s been well-earned — is seen to be somehow narcissistic or vulgar. After all: our society welcomes, no expects, a certain level of modesty.

Is it because of this that we are more prone to self-doubt? It would make sense, in this particular scheme.

Self-Help Sabotage

Think about it: if we acknowledge what they’re saying about us — that we are indeed fabulous — and behave as if we are, perhaps we’re ironically not that great. After all — we’re self-loving and self-accepting and, in our society, feeling this way is seen as suspect. A circular and convoluted theory to be sure, but perhaps not too far from the truth.

Add to this the fact that we’re bombarded with self-help-type messaging that very subtly tells us that we’re not good enough as we are, and that we have to work harder to be “our best selves.” How can one not second-guess oneself in this climate?

A trip to Amazon to view the most recent self-help books revealed the following:

Best Self: Be You, Only Better

The Greatest You

Unfu*k Yourself: Get Out of Your Head and Into Your Life

The common underlying message? That you’re not good enough as you are. Apparently, you need improvement.

We’re bombarded with these subtle and not-so-subtle messages that support our collective insecurities. It goes to follow that if the billion-dollar self-help industry continues to grow, so too will our fears of being “outed” as a fraud and a phony. Imposter Syndrome continues to thrive.

So how do we overcome the crippling yet irrational fear that we’ll be “found out” and seen for who we really are, according to our self-defeating introspections? Is it possible to do so and perhaps, more importantly, is it necessary?

Some may say that our self-doubt is responsible for a heightened sense of self-awareness in those instances when we have to present ourselves to a waiting audience.

Others would profess that Imposter Syndrome is the impetus for overachievement; a “practice makes perfect” creed that will hide the supposed fraud that may be revealed, regardless of whether or not it truly exists. The result? Perfection; at least to those on the outside.

It’s probably safe to say that Imposter Syndrome is responsible for some of the most compelling, important and life-changing presentations out there.

“Never let ’em see you sweat,” a wise person once said.

Those experiencing feelings of self-doubt have soldiered on and, in spite of their internal stress, delivered on the promise of something great and often life-changing for those looking on.

The fact of the matter is that perception is reality, therefore you are what they say you are.

Accept it. Enjoy it. Embrace it. Because we’re all faking in in one way or another.