The view from the back of the front pack
By: Alena Alasheeva
Tags: NYC, Running

I’m not fast, but I’m also not slow. You can think of me as a runner who barely makes the team and would usually finish last. Think that would be the definition of an underdog.

Being in the back of the front pack doesn’t bother me. I’m not competitive per se, I do like leveraging other people to push myself, but at the end of the day what brings me joy is seeing my improvements, forget what everyone else is doing.

This Tuesday night I’ve decided to do something different. I’m not big on putting myself into unknown social situations, as I get easily overwhelmed and feel out of place if I don’t know anyone. I live in NYC, one of the best running scenes, and Tuesdays is when OSR (Orchard Street Runners) is hosting late eve runs.

I’ve been telling myself I’ll go check it out for over a year now. My main excuse has always been it’s too inconvenient and late (it’s about 5 mi from where I live). And both things are true, but also if you yearn for a specific vibe, you can make things happen.

I ran to the meeting spot on Orchard St. (hence the name of the club). I actually missed the street, downtown/LES is still a maze to me even though I’ve been living in the city for 10 years. I ran almost all the way across the island, and then realized I must’ve passed it. It was getting way too close to 8pm, and the run starts sharp at 8pm. I said to myself, well, maybe it’s not meant to be and I’ll just run around here for a bit. I made it at 7:58pm, with 2 minutes to spare and awkwardly standing at the back of the crowd trying to see if I knew anyone. No, I do not. I take a gel.

The OSR crowd is an interesting bunch. It’s a lot of white, skinny, extremely fast dudes and maybe a few REALLY fast girls. You get the picture, I’m adding some type of diversity here. It’s also worth mentioning, runners are usually very friendly.

It’s 8pm, and a guy jumps on top of the bench to announce the route, and off we go. It’s a wild run. It’s adrenaline inducing and offers a lot of potential to get faster and meet new people.

I start with the group, and after about a mile I get left behind. No, I will not run through the light across an avenue in a rush hour. Two guys catch up to me and we briefly exchange hellos and our names. I may only recognize one of them in the future.

All three of us run together as a pack. I’m feeling good, my intention was to make it into a tempo run. I have an OSR10K race next week, so this would be a great test run. One of the guys splits off, not sure when and why, but I think it’s normal. I run behind the other guy. As long as I can keep my eyes on his back and maintain the distance we’re good. I’m tempo’ing, there’s no space for a chit-chat.

We’re about 2/3 of the way in, and I feel that I need to stop for some water. I’m rapidly deflating and hopefully water stop will help me bounce back. I stop at the water fountain. I start running again. The guy I was chasing is now a lot further, and after some turns I completely lose sight of him. This is when I started feeling the impeding wall. My pace slowed down and the run wasn’t fun anymore. I decided to call it for the OSR portion and headed back home.

Lately, I’ve been trying to stay more attuned to my emotions and recognize them instead of chastising myself for not being a certain way. That night was an interesting experiment for me to see how I behave in a completely foreign situation to me. I didn’t know anyone in the group. It felt very intimidating. It’s not like there was a possibility for me to show up and wow everyone with my performance. It’s me being a wallflower from start to the end. I was okay with that, because in the end of the day I was true to myself.