Death of the Hopeful ‘I’
By: Ramandeep Singh, न र
Tags: Spirituality, Self, Haiku, Poetry, Hope

Explanation

This mystic haiku captures the essence of the spiritual journey to Enlightenment.

‘I’ in the title, “Death of the Hopeful I”, points towards the false identity, the ego. This assumed identity keeps us tied to the past or future.

A seeker tries to attain Self-Realization. Some experiences happen, but who has ever attained by efforts? It is the greatest paradox that one on the path has to give his 100% and yet, Self-Realization is a matter of grace.

The seeker gives it all he has and when nothing else is possible, nothing more can be done; he gives up wholly.

In fact, it is not the seeker who gives up. Giving up happens automatically because of absolute hopelessness when nothing he does gives him the last jump! In this spontaneous surrender, the magic happens. The Universe opens its doors.

Spontaneous surrender is the ultimate fruit of failure of all efforts.

Various Enlightened beings went through a similar sequence of events in their spiritual journeys. Osho has covered this in good detail in his autobiography¹. Here is an excerpt from the same:

“I had struggled for it (Enlightenment) for many lives — it had been the only target for many many lives. And I had done everything that is possible to do to attain it, but I had always failed. It was bound to be so — because it cannot be an attainment. It is your nature, so how can it be your attainment? It cannot be made an ambition.” — Osho

Enlightenment is also known as The Great Death. During full awakening, the fake identity dies. More than attainment, it is dissolution.

The realization of the false ‘I’ helps you to drop the unreal and connects you with the Source. You realize that you are beyond the physical and psychological dimensions. This is Self-Realization, a quantum leap in life.

Then comes the second significant step. You merge in awareness completely.

Gautam Buddha calls this Anattā — No Self.

This is not your doing. It is a part of the natural spiritual process, a result of Self-Realization.

In Self-Realization, one sees the reality and knows the false as false. Some ego remains, but it cannot function as a master anymore. In Enlightenment, the false is no more. This is the point of no return. Ego dissolves entirely.

There is just Oneness, all separations disappear. There is no inside or outside, no worldly or spiritual.

There is just the flow of Life.

Gautam Buddha refers to this as Sunyata (the Void), Maharshi Patanjali calls this Samadhi (Union), Guru Nanak terms this Ik Onkar (One Eternal Vibration, The Creator), Rishi Manduka refers to this as Om (The Eternal Vibration).

Jesus calls this Love, Lao-Tzu terms this Tao (The Flow of Life), and Yogis refer to this as Shiva (Nothingness).

The complete annihilation of the false ‘I’ is Enlightenment.

Baba Bulleh Shah conveys this beautifully in the verse below.

If I look for you outside, then who is inside me?

If I look for you inside, then whose world is outside? You are inside; You are outside.

Everywhere is your essence. I am also You and You are also You.

I don’t find any difference.

Baba Bulleh Shah wrote the above Sufi poem originally in the Punjabi language. I sang this verse for you. Headphones recommended. Enjoy!