When You Have A Cereal Obsession
By: Lana Graham
Tags: Humor, Healthy Lifestyle, Cereal, Lifestyle, Breakfast

When You Have A Cereal Obsession

Who made the rule that cereal should be eaten at breakfast only?

Photo by Criativithy from Pexels

My mother visited my house the other day. When she opened the kitchen pantry, she let out an audible gasp. She stared at me with a perplexed look.

“Why on earth do you have so many breakfast cereals in here?” She asked, flabbergasted.

I shrugged. “Well, I eat granola for breakfast, and the kids eat Weetbix and Rice Bubbles in summer and porridge in winter. I’ve got Nutrigrain for after-lunch snacks. And then there’s Coco Pops Chex for dessert. Oh, and that box of limited-edition Unicorn Froot Loops is just for fun. Did you know they taste exactly like the one I used to eat as a kid in the 80s?”

It was the moment I realised I have a cereal obsession.

The problem is, I live in Australia where we have nowhere near the abundance of cereal choices as the lucky folk do in the United States.

I’ve dreamt of eating a bowl of Cap’n Crunch for as long as I can remember. And now I hear there are different flavours. (Stop teasing, Cotton Candy Crunch!)

Even worse, Australian cereal-makers have started to change breakfast cereals into ‘healthy’ options by taking out some of the sugar and salt content and replacing it with… to be honest, I don’t even know what they’re replacing it with.

Seriously, what are they thinking?

Now our bowls of wheat and oat loops taste like cardboard dipped in milk. Those sugary and deliciously salty Froot Loops from the 1980s that I mentioned earlier have been replaced with a recipe that tastes even worse than cardboard dipped in milk.

According to research by CHOICE (an independent consumer advocacy group in Australia), the healthiest breakfast cereals are the ones that have the least amount of sodium, sugar and saturated fat. Sounds sensible. Their top-ranking Australian cereal is gluten-free cornflakes. Sounds delicious, right?

My beloved Froot Loops didn’t even make the list. CHOICE recommends that these types of cereals should be seen as ‘treat foods’ rather than as a healthy breakfast option.

Back when I was a kid (I can’t believe I’m one of those people that say that now) I remember chowing down on a bowl of Frosties that I’m pretty sure contained 10% corn and 90% frosted sugar. In my sucrose-induced haze, I would enter the realm of Sugar-High Gods and Goddesses. I’d be buzzing all morning.

Those were the good old days. Now parents are bombarded with healthy-choice options and made to feel guilty if they add to their supermarket trolley anything that isn’t gluten-free, fat-free, fun-free cardboard-tasting cereal.

But I still dream of filling my pantry shelves with boxes of multi-coloured, sugar-laden, breakfast cereals. Is it too much to ask Australian companies to bring back the golden days of cereal?

I understand we as a nation may have a problem with obesity. However, surely we are able to read the back of a cereal packet and make an informed decision as to whether or not it’s a suitable breakfast choice for us and our children. What are the alternatives?

Apparently, half of all Australians skip breakfast altogether and wake up tired each morning. So, why not have a pick-me-up bowl of Froot Loops for breakfast instead? Which alternative is the lesser of two evils?

Personally, I eat breakfast each day because I enjoy it. Having the choice to eat a ‘healthy’ bowl of granola or to indulge in a sweet unicorn-inspired cereal is something I consider to be a privilege. Eating cereal is my little luxury in life. And I love eating cereal for breakfast, lunch or dinner.

I just hope those cereal-makers keep my consumer choices open. Because I don’t think I could handle swapping my beloved breakfast cereals for something so heinous as a piece of toast in the morning.