How to Keep an Introspective Journal — A Fundamental Habit in Personal Development
By: Alessandro Spataro
Tags: Introspection, Habit Building, Journal, Mindfulness, Personal Growth

Introspective journaling is essentially creating a platform for daily conversation with yourself — along with your inner child and all the voices in your head — working together to discover, discuss, and solve the trials and tribulations of your life.

In my opinion, introspective writing in a journal is one of the most powerful (and underrated) positive habits out there in the personal development world. It is almost always encouraged, but sometimes seems to only be suggested as some sort of complimentary habit that “feels good to do” once in a while. Or perhaps there is so much crap out there that it just gets lost in all the noise. Of course, I can’t say that there are only positive attributes associated with the journaling habit; there can be some potentially negative (and sometimes even dangerous) outcomes of the habit as well if not self-moderated adequately, which we will discuss later in the post.

Journal writing is like opening up the repressive flood gates — ah what a feeling! Think of a time when your mind is completely consumed with a recent experience or with ruminating thoughts while your focus on the present is virtually non-existent — then you sit down with a close friend and lay it all out to them. And they listen. And they don’t judge you (most of the time). And they don’t project their insecurities and unsolicited, ill-suited advice on you (sometimes). You know that feeling? Well, that is catharsis — just getting it all out. I’ll say that this is even better when you have the conversation with your real BFF: yourself! If you are not your own best friend, well, we will dive into that in future blog post — but I digress.

Not only can journaling serve as a therapeutic and private emotional release; but it can also document detailed records of particular events in your life. The raw emotions experienced, the ruminating thoughts, the present ambitions, and a snapshot in time of your state-of-mind; all which can be reviewed in future introspection and analysis. That is when journaling becomes even more powerful and no-longer serves as “just” a cathartic habit. When you are looking back at past entries, you can start to spot patterns, triggers, and a better idea of how much a particular thing consumes your mind and what keeps you moving. You can start to piece together the jig-saw puzzle that is, YOU. You start to listen more closely, pick apart all the noise in your head, and actually start to make sense of it. This is how you really get to”know thyself”, as the ancient greek philosophers used to say.

“I write because I don’t know what I think until I read what I say.” — Flannery O’Connor

So, lets look at how to get into the habit, review the different types and techniques of journaling, and discuss some of the benefits and risks involved.

If you are looking to get to know your true self better, I strongly suggest starting right here. Find yourself a nice and fancy hard-cover journal and do not worry about how expensive they are; you want to encourage yourself to write in it as often as you can, so an attractive book will help with that. Once you start to see the benefits and start enjoying the process, it won’t feel like effort anymore — I promise. Here are some practical tips to help you get started and develop the habit:

Treat it like your current mini passion project. It will be the the physical manifestation (and a log) of your journey — like a photos from your travel memories

Have it on display as a showpiece for you so you can keep it at the forefront of your mind (in a private but visible location to yourself)

Don’t let it collect dust, remember how much you spent on it?

Use a pen-to-paper method — typing on a computer just doesn’t do the trick. Don’t worry, there are other awesome introspection strategies that involve digital integration which I will discuss in future posts.

Pair writing time with another existing habit — usually, the easiest way is to write with your morning coffee! Yes, it will also replace your mindless social media scrolling while you sip; so you’re welcome.

Use the habit to encourage “me time”. How much time do you have dedicated to spending it with yourself? If you have your coffee on your commute, well — stop that. Wake up 20 minutes earlier, commit to a little romantic coffee date and check in with yourself before you head out to face the day. Make the time! THIS is what self-love is all about.. Oh my goodness, you’re welcome! (Drake reference with jazz hands)

The second most important thing to remember: throw all punctuation, grammar, spelling, neatness, format, structure, paragraphing, line spacing, etc. etc. etc. to the wind! You only have a limited amount of attention committed to the book once you sit down to write. DO NOT waste it on these frivolous things! It will disrupt your flow of thought, waste your limited attention, and restrict your vulnerability.

Although it may be useful at the beginning, try not to keep a rigid structure for entry length. Write until your heart’s content, and then stop when you have had enough. I find a medium journal size (21x15cm) is perfect because the page sizes are not as intimidating nor are they too small to comfortably write in, and I aim for a minimum of one page per entry to make it worth while.

The absolute most important thing to remember: be 100% honest, vulnerable, and judgement-free. Allow yourself to speak in extremes, test out crazy thoughts and ideas, say stupid or mean things about others or yourself, say literally anything that comes to mind. They are all important clues in discovering your true self, even if they seem far-fetched or completely untrue at first. Unpack them, then decide to discard or dive deeper. Remember, ain’t NO ONE going to see this, ever. Make sure that there is zero chance that anyone, ever, will see it. If you do not have 100% confidence that no one will ever see your entries, you will not be 100% honest and vulnerable, which kind of defeats the purpose. I can’t stress this point enough!

So, now you might ask, “what do I write about?”. This is the part that discourages most people after their first few attempts. It is expected that as soon as one sits down and puts the pen to paper, it will all start flowing out. To be fair, most days it DOES work like that — but never at the beginning. So, be aware that it is easy to get discouraged and give up on it quite quickly (just like any other pro-active habit).

It is best to try out each of the different methods and techniques of journaling I have listed in this post to see which ones suit you best, then you can make it a real and enjoyable habit. I stumbled upon a great book called “The New Diary — Tristine Rainer” which laid all this out neatly for me, and I will share some of the author’s great work with you. (Check out her book to go deeper: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/1027522.The_New_Diary ).

There are four natural modes of expression: Catharsis, Description, Free-intuitive Writing, and Reflection. Push yourself to experiment with each one for a couple of entries and make mental notes of how you are feeling emotionally before and after the entry, as well as your insights or emotions towards the topic you wrote about. This will help you determine which method suits you most and gives you the most value for your dedicated time. You may find that some modes of expression can be more fitting than others for various periods of life experiences or even daily change in moods, so it is also good to have some experience with each; this way you can switch up your methods in the future to keep your new habit fresh and enjoyable. Here is a really quick summary of the four modes of expression:

Catharsis: immediate emotional expression

ranting or venting

emotional release

therapeutic and private

great record of thoughts and emotions during a specific event of life period

Description: Narration of events, feelings, dreams, people, places, etc.

illustrative of life experiences

preserves certain “unforgettable” perceptions for future

record of memories

re-creates perspective from the period of time when written

Free-Intuitive Writing: Releases the voice of the inner subconsciousness

sometimes can help explain the source of an intense emotional state

subconscious brainstorming, letting out whatever comes

unrestricted, uncensored and usually non-logical

Reflection: observations of the process of ones life and writing

allows you to notice connections or significances between different topics and events

looking at a life situation more objectively or from a third person perspective

helps to identify issues or sources of issues

allows you to build a personal philosophy of life based on your experiences

Catharsis has always been my personal favourite, although now I have found myself mostly using Reflection. It may be just a coincidence, but I believe that the reason for the shift could be that I have developed stronger emotional regulation and mindfulness over the years which has allowed me to process thoughts and emotions at a less frantic pace and from a distance.

The truth is that I have customized my own mode of expression which can incorporate all four methods in a single entry, some more weighted than others. Mixing them together could very well make for a perfect journal entry. A great example would be perhaps while you traveling on vacation; your spirit is completely free and you want to creatively express all the current emotions your are experiencing (catharsis), a descriptive record of the interesting people you meet along the way and the delicious meals you had (Description), allowing the buried raw and primal truth that you feel surfacing to come roaring out through your pen (Free-intuitive), and documenting your new insights on why “you can’t feel like this everyday” while at home (Reflection).

So, when you sit down for your entry and put the pen to paper, it is important to first mentally check in with yourself — your mood, ruminating thoughts, and your current flow of emotions. What are the first few things that come to mind, or what is circling around in your head that is taking you away from the present moment? Usually, the first things that come up are closely related to how your feeling, so choose those topics to start and pick them apart in the entry. Practicing meditation can help with this self check-in because it will help you un-identify with your thoughts momentarily and observe from a distance with more clarity. Once you identify the spotlight topic currently in your mind, just start putting your thoughts on to paper.

One way that I like to get the ink flowing is to write like I am writing to a friend. Eventually you might start to notice how the writing take on two forms of identity, conversing with each other. Sometimes it’s the self and the inner child, or voices of one’s parents or caregivers, or maybe one of the four horsemen (inner critic, worrier, victim, and the perfectionist). There are a few other writing techniques (also adapted from Tristine Rainer’s book) that you can implement in your entry which can help get your thoughts on paper with a little less resistance:

Lists

good to summarize ideas, feelings, to do, etc.

collects floating thoughts or issues in the mind onto paper — less dwelling

creates a condensed illustrative summary of overwhelming events or feelings

helps to focus, tame, and comprehend wayward parts of your experience

Ideas:

things I am afraid of, things that irritate me, things I enjoy or make me happy

Beliefs I have discarded or believe I have

Chronological lists — desires that formally motivated you, times I have felt this way before, Life stepping stones

Portraits:

a form of description for people in your life

a summary of how you perceive them, and how they reflect yourself or how you project yourself

can help you deal with or understand that person better

self-portraits

Map of Consciousness:

a use of free-intuitive writing, but with pictures and words, sketches

just start drawing and see what thoughts and reflections arise from it

Guided Imagery:

Uses catharsis, basically daydreaming and drawing it out on paper

having a story or thoughts, and drawing them out

draw out your figure of your Inner Wisdom, complimented with a dialog entry

writing in poems or using imagery as metaphors

Second Chance entries, telling the story with an alternate way the event could have happened or been dealt with

Altered Point of View:

Writing about yourself objectively, using “s/he” instead of “I”

writing in someone else’s perspective, using “I” to gain insight on how they might be feeling or perceiving

writing imagining you are in a different geographical location or time (childhood, etc.)

Unsent Letters:

letters to people of significance in your life; past, present, or future

things that you can’t or shouldn’t say to the person, or dont feel comfortable doing

consciously thinking “to” the person

clarifying your issues or feelings with the person, having a chance to reflect and review before sharing

Can write a letter to yourself or to/from your inner child

Dialogue:

similar uses of unsent letters, but gaining the other person’s perspective, or putting yourself in their shoes

having a potentially harmful conversation in safety of your journal

careful not to be selective or delusional

can have a dialog with inner/outer self, or a body part, or anything significant

Although consistent introspective journaling is mostly beneficial to all ages and types of people, it can also influence self-harm depending on the author’s relationship with their self. The paradox is that consistency of journaling will reinforce the discussions and messages to oneself; so positive messaging will grow roots in time — but if a toxic relationship with oneself exists, this could lead to continuous re-affirmations of unworthiness and negativity. So, this is why it is important to be mindful of your journal content and make note of how often you are giving a platform for one of the four horsemen to badger and shame you — whether it is the inner critic, victim, perfectionist, or the worrier.

It is important to note that a little bit of self-loathing can be helpful, as the repetitive badgering can spark an innate defense mechanism in you and help you rise up against your demons. Reading over some past entries, you may be able to see just how mean you can actually be to yourself and acknowledge that you wouldn’t treat anyone else this way; “so why do I deserve it?”. In time, it will actually help shape your relationship with yourself into positive and encouraging matrimony. This insight and many more can be discovered while you burrow your face into your pages and start to enjoy the judgement-free honesty that is finally pouring out of you.

After some time of writing in your journal, regardless of if you use prompts or just rant away on a page, you will start to notice all the benefits soon enough. Checking in with yourself in a short entry as first thing in the morning will help set you up to have a clear mind starting the day, especially if you use the entry to set your intentions. A morning entry could also provide daily reminders to keep you moving forward, whether they are reminders of your long term goals and the small steps to take today, or acknowledgements of your current suffering — reaffirming to be kind to yourself and your inner child. Writing an entry in the evening could help you purge the rumination from your head, helping you sleep soundly throughout the night. Feeling lonely? The journal is always ready to listen and help get you through.

The daily life benefits are nice to have of course, but the most substantial is the long-term development of your relationship with yourself. Analogous to meditation, it serves a nice relaxing release in the day, while developing your mindfulness and creating clarity in your life. Puking out your emotions and ruminative thoughts onto a record that can be reviewed in the future can help you piece together your bullshit patterns, accurately remember how you felt during a significant time or event, and help you locate the source of your inherent suffering so that you can take steps to deal with it effectively. Gratitude entries that bring all the positive aspects of your life to light with acknowledge and praise can substantially make a difference on your life perspective as well, helping you realize that things could be worse, and that this too shall pass.

Give it a try, get to know yourself for who you really are!