Dear Julie: The Fear
By: Julie Cohen
Tags: Writing Tips, Self Confidence, Writing, Writing Advice, The Fear

Dear Julie: The Fear

Does it ever get any easier to write?

Photo by Tonik on Unsplash

Dear Julie, How do you get over that feeling of not being good enough when you’re writing? I love writing, but I have so much self-doubt. Does every author go through this or is it a sign that it’s not meant to be? Linda

(Warning: the following answer makes copious use of all caps.)

Dear Linda,

Here’s the real answer: YOU DON’T EVER GET OVER IT.

I have never, ever, EVER met a successful author who feels that they are good enough. There may be some out there, but I haven’t met them yet. When a group of authors get together, if the coffee or wine is flowing, sooner or later they are going to start talking about how rubbish they are, how their book is going badly, how they don’t think anyone cares, how it used to be easy but now it’s not, how they’re pretty sure all the negative reviews are true and that they really might as well give up now…

I call it THE FEAR. You have only to mention THE FEAR to an author to see a gleam of recognition in their eyes.

I once took wine with two of the most successful commercial fiction authors in the UK. I won’t say their names, but believe me, you’ve read their books. And when I said, ‘But surely by now you two must have got over THE FEAR,’ both of them turned to me and said ‘Oh my God, no! It’s worse than ever!’

It’s not surprising, I suppose: writing, like any creative pursuit, is very personal. You feel that you’re not only putting your work out there for scrutiny, but also yourself. It’s bound to be scary. Also, writers often work alone, and it’s very difficult to trust your own judgment, especially when you’re starting out.

Personally I think that THE FEAR is not only natural, but necessary. Having THE FEAR means that you are challenging yourself, trying to break out of your comfort zones. It means that you are putting your work out there to be seen. It means that you’re serious about what you’re doing and that you care about it. Often the hardest, and the scariest things to do are the most worthwhile and rewarding.

So…how do you get over it?

If I’m right, you can’t. It will follow you your entire career. However, I do think it helps to know that everyone has THE FEAR, and that it’s normal, and actually even maybe a good thing.

(If you want a good book to read on this very subject, try The Courage to Write by Daniel Keyes, which talks about the ways that some very famous authors have tried to overcome their fear. I also love the idea behind Sarah Painter’s charming and helpful Worried Writer podcast; check that out and hear how other authors get through their fears. http://www.worriedwriter.com)

Having writer friends who know what THE FEAR is like can help, too. They can remind you that you’ve overcome it in the past, that no, this attack is not worse than any other time, that yes, you’re always this miserable, and of course it’s okay to have a bit of chocolate to get over it.

(Non-writers don’t tend to understand. They look at you like you’re a crazy person when you tell them that the book you loved yesterday is the WORST THING IN THE WORLD today. The best thing non-writers can do is nod indulgently and supply you frequently and copiously with cake.)

Mostly though, Linda, I’m afraid you’re just going to have to suck it up and deal with it. Feel THE FEAR and write anyway. If you’re scared, you’re doing it right.

Hopefully it will help you to know that this is absolutely normal. When I teach, I spend a lot of time talking about THE FEAR, and the most common response when I mention it to new writers is utter relief. Being afraid isn’t a sign that there’s something wrong. Everyone feels the same way.

Of course sometimes, THE FEAR is a sign of something more serious. If you have mental health issues, it’s often much harder to write. I have suffered from anxiety and depression in the past, and they do make THE FEAR almost impossible to overcome. Please do look carefully at your life and feelings as a whole, and if you feel this is part of a greater mental health problem, call your GP.

But in general, if THE FEAR is unattached to deeper issues: it’s normal. It’s expected. It never, ever goes away.

Sorry to be the bearer of bad news. But no one ever said this was going to be easy. Thank God for chocolate.

Love,

Julie x