fabiochiu/medium-articles huggingface dataset:
After the Rain
By: Vixen Lea
Tags: Nature, Free Verse, Forgiveness, Poetry, Transformation

After the Rain

Image by author

Wind kisses the tops of spindly trees,

a gentle apology

for last night’s tantrum.

Branches lie twisted,

those too stubborn to let go

of their lofty rigidity.

Under my feet

the dull carpet of late autumn

has turned a shimmering pallet

of ochre and amber.

Even the mosses stand at attention

in this electric air,

sending fairy-thin tendrils

skyward to catch trickles of sunlight.

The forest sighs

and folds around me

like a hug.

We are forgiven,

the storm and I,

Absolved.

My organic body,

made leaden

by confrontation,

will transform

in the womb of the woods,

return to humus,

fertile and giving.

What was broken

by the storm

becomes

humble

and reborn.
Always starting but never complete.
By: Indy B
Tags: Website Design, Digital, SEO, Transformation, Writing

This has been a theme of mine when it comes to trying to kick start a business idea or thought that I have. Something tells me that I should give it ago but by the end of the thought I’ve unraveled it all so that I don’t have to commit or get fully engrossed into it. Don’t get me wrong, I will research every detail about how to do it..but then stop.

Digital things, gadgets technology have been in my interest since I started making websites at age 12. Now for the past 12 years it’s been my career/job.

Writing has never been my thing. Lengthy articles again not for me. Getting on Medium to write short stories about tech is an interesting change for me, so let’s see how long this lasts.
Book Review of “NO MATTER WHAT!: 9 STEPS TO LIVE THE LIFE YOU LOVE” by Lisa Nichols
By: Walter Ray
Tags: No Matter What, Motivation, Lisa Nicols, Book Review, Transformation

I can’t help but think of the words from that Yolanda Adam’s song, “The Battle Is The Lord’s”. Part of the chorus rings out to me:

Remember that God only wants to use you

No matter what you happen to go through right now

Remember that in the midst of it all, God only wants to use you.

The lyrics to that song are powerful…and so is Lisa Nichols book.

In this book, Lisa share with us 9 STEPS TO LIVE THE LIFE YOU LOVE. I had to put that in caps because I think most of us can think otherwise. This life is can be at times…blah. Lisa breaks the book down in terms of Bounce-Back Muscles we all need to develop and empower our life.

The 9 Bounce-Back Muscles:

Lisa breaks down the meaning of each muscle with honesty and vulnerability from her life. Examples she shares from her life are very real. Lisa does not hold back detail and her honesty about the situations. I was shocked and encouraged to read on at the same time. I was asking myself out load, did she just say and in that way? There is such a down to earth writing style of this book. You feel as if Lisa is speaking with you face to face. She doesn’t just give you a rah, rah speech in this book, but calls you to an honest assessment and action steps for your life too! This is another book in which I keep for reference going back to again and again.

If you haven’t picked up a copy of this book, YOU must-have it for encouragement fighting your “battles” of your life. You can order a copy of Lisa’s book > https://amzn.to/2KbvjJi

I strongly encourage this book as a beginning read for a teenager. there are many tips for them to transform into great adults having this book.

Thanks for reading my review,

donovin

Other books by Lisa Nichols:

Abundance Now: Amplify Your Life & Achieve Prosperity Today

Chicken Soup for the African American Woman’s Soul: Laughter, Love and Memories to Honor the Legacy of Sisterhood (Chicken Soup for the Soul)

Do you like eBooks? You can browse through a variety of books in my digital stores:

Reasonable

Otherwise

Check Out other Book Reviews of books I have read:

https://bookreviewofmindbuildingbooks.blogspot.com

👕 Into T — shirts and mugs? Browse my Designs store at: donovin_4_designs

💻 Interested in starting a Home Business? NEW SIDE HUSTLE
Fail Proof Weight Loss transformation
Tags: Motivation, Fitness, Resolutions, Weight Loss, Transformation

Based on real life experiences

Fail proof weight loss transformation

January 1st is the most important day in everyone’s life, not just only as the day of New year celebrations but as the most wishful day which seeds new year resolutions with a new hope to change our entire life, Health and Fitness being one of the most wished new year resolutions.

Many of you might have planned to enroll or already enrolled new fitness programs by paying a huge sum of yearly memberships for Gyms, Fitness Clubs, Diet programs etc.

The most wished resolution becomes the most escaped thing of the past within just a few weeks. I hope to change at least a few of you through my book gum.co/IXsTg

#weightloss #transformation
The Light of Dawn
By: Afiyah The Poet
Tags: Mystery, Change, 365 Days Of Poetry, Poetry, Transformation

The Light of Dawn

Photo by Jonathan Kemper on Unsplash

Something changing

my world is shifting

the moon is shining

brightly

It is dark yet

it is bright

my eyes adjusting

for the new world emerging

I hear the whisper

of the nightly creatures

telling me the secrets

I’ve been seeking

Piercing eyes

tell the story

to give me wisdom

that I need for the road

Guardians of the night

make a way

until I find myself

in the light of dawn.

(365 Days of Poetry — Day 327)
Metamorphosis
By: Afiyah The Poet
Tags: Spirituality, 365 Days Of Poetry, Dark Night Of The Soul, Poetry, Transformation

Being in the cauldron

of the dark night of the soul

I’m broken open

in the metamorphosis

The old self is melting

as new things form

miracles take place

in this place of change

Things are crumbling

in the refining heat

what no longer serves

evaporates into air

This is not quite finished

the work is not done

I’ll stay in the fire

until new things are born.

(365 Days of Poetry — Day 328)
Shields Up!
By: Kit Cassingham
Tags: Emotions, Mindset, Fear, Transformation

Nights in White Satin, by Moody Blues, was my class’s Senior song. Our mascot was a knight, complete with a suit of armor in the school’s front entry. It represented our strength and invincibility. And no animals were harmed in our march to world domination.

Armor always seemed like such an interesting way to protect yourself from slings and arrows, and maybe lances too. It looks as if it mostly protected knights from sharp things that could poke and hurt them. But, it looks as if it would be uncomfortable, too, not allowing much ventilation, being heavy, and restricting movement.

I’m grateful to not have a job or life that requires armor for safety! I enjoy feeling free and moving about with ease and joy.

And then I heard an interesting twist about armor from Brené Brown on her new podcast “Dare To Lead”. She talked about how we protect ourselves in emotional situations, and she feels armor is what fear raises as a response when we are scared and uncomfortable. Like the knights of old, emotional armor is heavy and holds you back. She went on to say that when you don’t deal with the emotional armor that you can experience grief, rage, and depression.

Ouch! So while a knight’s armor holds slings and arrows out, your emotional armor holds slings and arrows in. Now that is uncomfortable!

The Modern Approach

In Star Trek, Captain Picard commands “Shields up!” when the enemy is starting to fire on the ship or appears threatening. Shields are meant to be raised and lowered, not to be kept up all the time. The same is true for you. Your shields, or armor, are meant to be raised and lowered as appropriate. It takes awareness to stay on top of this and take the proper action.

Generally, it’s emotions that aren’t serving you, and you don’t know how to process those that cause you to put on your armor. Emotions like grief, embarrassment, sorrow, discomfort, uncertainty, shame, resentment, anger, and even shyness.

To avoid having those unprocessed emotions impact your health, it’s up to you to develop the tools and mindset to clear them quickly. Recognizing that need is the first step. Taking action is the next step, and that comes via talking to trusted and supportive friends, reading books, listening to podcasts, meditating, counseling or therapy, coaching, and/or taking classes.

Learning to process emotions, the ones that don’t serve you, is important for living a life of freedom. Freedom has a cost of constant vigilance. Processing emotions is an ongoing job. The effort is worthwhile
The diet culture is the most toxic community to partake in.
By: Myah Broyles
Tags: Body Image, Body Positive

The diet culture is the most toxic community to partake in. The number on a scale or the amount of calories one intakes on a scale does not define health. Media and stereotypes portray the wrong message for people of any age, gender, or ethnicity.

From the moment we begin to grow, it is engraved in our brains that skinny equals healthy. While naturally skinny people can be very healthy and can nourish their bodies well, that is not always the case.

For example, I have a friend who is very naturally small and very much has a “desired” body type. While she looks very good, her diet often consists of chips, candy, soda, desserts, etc, and she does not feel the need to workout. I very rarely see her eat full healthy meals that properly nourish her body, yet she stays petite and maintains weight. On the other hand, one of my other friends is considered thicker and heavier, but she works out, eats very healthy, and nourishes her body with satisfying, healthy meals.

One is clearly in much better health than the other, but society would very quickly portray the naturally skinny, unhealthy girl as having “the perfect body,” even though she is not properly taking care of it. The lack of common sense lacks within the trillion dollar diet industry, and many people are beginning to speak up about it.

Since many have addressed the issue and began to spread body positivity, some brands have began to show plus size models/athletes in their ads and campaigns. This has demonstrated the idea that all body’s should be socially accepted and that any body type, in properly nourished, can be healthy.

The diet industry has made far too much money from enforcing the idea of a “perfect body” in the heads of boys and girls, young or old. In fact, the preferred body type changes all the time! Even within looking at the last 10 years, the preferred body type has gone from stick thin, no curves to thick, curvy, small waist (for women at least). Men are often more accepted if they are muscular, but recently, there has been a large increase of men being preferred to have a more relaxed body.

In conclusion,
Why is Accepting our own Bodies so Difficult?
By: Tessa Bragg
Tags: Accepting Yourself, Body Positive, Im Not Perfect, Being Proud Of Yourself, Body Image

As a young girl in high school I am very self conscious of my body. At times I find myself always looking in the mirror finding more and more insecurities about myself than I had the day before. Some women would tell you, “It’s okay to be self-conscious everyone is” or “I learned to accept who I was and then I didn’t care what I looked like”. But it’s hard to just move on and accept who I am when I’m surrounded by girls who I believe to be much prettier and skinnier. It’s hard to look in the mirror and see a body I’m not proud of.

In this day and age the perfect body is pretty unattainable unless you’re born with it and have the luckiest genes. Guys want a girl who’s got big boobs and a skinny waist while also having a big butt and thick thighs. This perfect girl they want is not even real or attainable.

The most rational thing to do would be to screw them and say, “If my body isn’t want they want then they’re not worth it” but for some reason I can’t do that. Maybe it’s cause in movies and TV I see girls who have “the perfect body” or because I see girls at my school that have all the guys and have a great body. I’m literally surrounded by things that tell me I should be un-satisfied.

I hate reading articles or seeing tv shows where in the end the girl decides to love herself and accept who she is because that’s just not realistic anymore. The message is great but they always get a guy who accepts them or they’re in a society where they can be themselves and people admire it. If I wore a bathing suit in public that said screw you on the back of it people would just laugh and stare; unlike in the movies where they look at the girl and go “ooh. I like her vibe”.

Our minds are not programmed to not hear at what others say about us or not compare ourselves to others. It’s not in our nature to not feel bad when others stare or when people tell us we don’t look good. So why are we so pressured by other’s to accept what we look like when others don’t like it?

Instead of trying to accept who I am and trying to be happy with my body, I’ve accepted the fact that I’m unhappy with my body and there will always be things I wish were different. I’ve accepted the fact that I’m not perfect and I think as long as I realize that I’ll be okay.
Hi Tara,
By: Andrea Huls
Tags: Body Image

Hi Tara,

After I had my son, many things changed. The first few months were extremely hard and I didn’t feel like myself. Not only did my body hurt, but I had little sleep and felt distant from my husband.

However, things got better. Postpartum is a challenging period and recovery is slow. Navigating motherhood is both beautiful and hard.

Talking openly with your partner about how you’re feeling will make a difference. We often asume what others are thinking based on our fears and our issues. I’m sure he loves you and desires you no matter what.

I struggled with bulimia for over a decade and I still struggle with accepting my body. Our society discriminates fat people in disgusting ways. We’re programmed to believe that there’s only one acceptable body, if we don’t fit this mold we’re less than.

I still have a lot of work to do. Fat phobia is ingrained in many of us. But we can challenge this notion. Feeling fat and being fat are not the same.

Your feelings are valid. Be kind to yourself, be patient. Focus on your baby, they grow extremely fast.
Should the Media be Promoting a Certain Beauty Standard?
By: Rebecca Marder
Tags: Body Image, Stigma, Body Positive

When you open a magazine what do you see? How about Instagram? You see women with flat stomachs, zero fat on their bodies. Seeing these images as a teenaged girl or even an adult can take a huge toll on their mental health. The media should support more inclusive beauty standards.

Because of beauty standards in the media, there has been an increase in eating disorders all over the world. From the years 2000 and 2018, the percentage of people with eating disorders increased from 3.4% to 7.8%. Eating disorders are not only mentally draining, but physically exhausting.

A survey taken by people in the UK showed that millions of adults have experienced suicidal thoughts and tendencies due to body image. That means that every single day, someone looks in the mirror and thinks that life isn’t worth living because of what they look like.

The media is making people think that they aren’t beautiful because of their body shape or size. Another survey taken by people in the UK showed that about 1 in 5 of the 4,505 people said images on social media had caused them to worry about their body image.

Even brands like Victoria’s Secret have a lack of plus sized models. In 2018, the Victoria’s Secret show had little to no models that were plus sized. The discrimination of other body types can make people believe that they need to look a certain way.

France is beginning to ban companies from photoshopping an editing images of models. According to BBC, “Those who refuse to include the indicative “photographie retouchée” warning label on their edited images could be fined €37,500 (£33,000) or up to 30 percent of the price it took to produce the advert.” The government believes that photo manipulation is a public health issue and hopes that the banning of altering photos will tackle the issue of people seeing false photos of models.

Because of the beauty standard represented by the media, there has been an increase in suicidal thoughts as well as eating disorders and more women worrying about their body. The media should support more inclusive beauty standards.

Citations:

-(2020, June 3rd,) https://www.singlecare.com/blog/news/eating-disorder-statistics/

-Haroon Siddique One in eight UK adults have suicidal thoughts over body image — poll Accessed 06 Dec. 2020

- Elizabeth Hahn The toxicity of beauty standards The Catalyst Accessed 06 Dec. 2020

- Olivia Petter France just banned advertisers from photoshopping models The Independent Accessed 06 Dec. 2020
Body Shaming: Who is to blame?
By: Lucy Scotchmer
Tags: Bodyshamimg, Reality TV, Journalism, Paparazzi, Body Image

However, what I begin to question is why does this article seem to rely so heavily on the images taken of Molly-Mae in a bikini for readership? By taking a look at the feature’s heading that is branded as a ‘PICTURE EXCLUSIVE’ it becomes apparent that this piece is bound to be image focused, and with a whopping total of 33 images present in the article it makes it hard for the reader to focus on any text that is also featured.

In one of my recent blog posts I discussed The Benefits of Online Journalism, where I touched upon interactive audiences being an advantage of digital journalism. However, the comments section at the end of an online feature which encourages interactive audiences acts as a breeding ground for internet trolls. Internet trolls for you that don’t know is someone online (usually anonymous) who intentionally makes rude statements with the intent of causing upset. When taking a look at the comments section below The Daily Mail article I was stunned by some of the revolting comments that were posted about the YouTube star (see images below).

Image by Down with protests from The Daily Mail

Image by SouthOxfordshireMike from The Daily Mail

The article along with these comments did not go unnoticed as Molly-Mae uploaded a YouTube video on the 22nd July 2020 FLYING TO IBIZA WITH 8 HOURS NOTICE!!!! which included a personal response to these images that were circulating amongst the tabloids:

“It’s just annoying because I’ve literally been working so hard the last two months to really get in a good shape and loose a bit of weight.”

It saddens me to see that we live in a world that is clearly incapable of normalising normal bodies. Has none ever seen a stretch mark before? Cellulite? Or do we still live in a fantasy land where people believe that those in the spotlight are somehow immune from these perfectly normal bodily attributes. I understand that The Daily Mail holds no control over what their audience wish to comment but what they do have control over is the articles that they choose to release. Whether you are Molly-Mae or not if a photograph is taken of you unknowingly the chances that you will approve of the photo is very slim and as she states in her Instagram story she felt ‘betrayed’ by the press for releasing these images that were caught of her unknowingly that sparked negative comments about the reality stars figure. Ultimately, it seems to me that this article acts a catalyst for body shaming remarks.
Learning Radical Self-Love: A Review of “The Body is Not an Apology” by Sonya Renee Taylor
By: Convivial Culture
Tags: Body Positive, Intersectionality, Love Yourself, Body Image, Self Love

Book Cover of “The Body is Not An Apology: The Power of Radical Self-Love” by Sonya Renee Taylor

Do you want to learn how to love yourself but don’t know where to start?

You’re not alone.

Fortunately, there’s a book that breaks down the ways we succumb to body shame throughout our lives and teaches how to begin overcoming those patterns. Sonya Renee Taylor, poet and author, wrote The Body Is Not an Apology: The Power of Radical Self-Love to empower each of us to create a world free of body shame.

The author covers a wide range of topics in this book. Beginning with the rationale behind a body-centered analysis, Taylor then makes her case for why we need a radical approach. In order to dismantle body shame, she argues, we must rid ourselves of the notion that some bodies are “bad” while others are “good.” This requires a dash of intersectionality.

This isn’t a small task — and Sonya agrees. However, if we want to see our communities embody inclusivity, kindness, and empathy, we must first cultivate these viewpoints within ourselves.

Taylor offers “the three peaces” to guide us towards making peace with our bodies. The first particularly resonated with me: “Make peace with not understanding.” Sonya Renee explains how, especially with increased access to information from the internet, society pressures us to know everything — to never be wrong. Of course, this isn’t a reasonable expectation for anyone. No one can know everything! Allowing space for not understanding, furthermore, opens up the “opportunity for exploration without judgment or demands.”

This book packs a punch when it comes to detailing the structures that cause us to enact body shame. From government and the media to capitalist messages signaling that we must buy more to achieve our vision of “enough,” it’s no wonder we internalize so much shame about our bodies! We then project that shame by reinforcing those same systems — what Taylor calls “body terrorism.”

“Mapping a way out of shame” and into empathy — and, eventually, radical self-love — seems like a monumental challenge! Taylor’s practical advice, thankfully, can point us towards the habits and thought patterns that peel away layers of body shame one day at a time.

I give this book five stars out of five! Get your copy and support independently owned bookstores by clicking the link below!

All Rights Reserved: Please contact us to purchase any articles for reprint

Books in this Article:

https://bookshop.org/a/18512/9781523090990
Why Your Body Will Never Be Perfect
By: Ally O
Tags: Body Image, Short, Positivity

Yes, I know. The title is cold. Cut and dry. Read it again. With over 12 different body shapes for the female form, what can we even classify as “perfect”? skin and bones? No, then people judge you for looking sickly. But if you're on the thicker side, you're immediately obese and ugly in societies eyes. Is there a body shape that is perfect?
How I added 6 inches to my arms.
By: Michael Washienko
Tags: Bicep, Arm, Fitness, Health, Body Image

Arms have always been my weakest body part and the most difficult for me to grow. It seems like nothing I did ever seemed to work. At my wits end, I decided to make a change. This is what worked.

I made a commitment to making arm growth a priority. For years I never really trained arms because I considered them vain and not important to being an acrobat. Overcoming this mental block was the biggest struggle. We are the ones that get in the way of our own success by telling ourselves we don’t want it. This is true in relationships, gaining wealth and all aspects of life. I made emotional, physical and mental space for my goal. I didn’t try to run a marathon while growing my arms. I cut back on everything and just trained arms. I looked at the people with the biggest arms and copied them. These people are older dudes abs bros. They take flexing selfies in front of the urinals at the gym and listen to an entire Judas Priest album while camping at the curl machine. I became like them. We contain multitudes and in order to grow beyond our weakness we sometimes need to add a new layer to our self. This new dimension holds new space for joy, compassion and reflection. I trained arms 4 days a week. 2 bicep days and 2 tricep days. Is this unbalanced? Yes. Did it work when nothing else did? Yes. It is not hard to grow our strengths. It takes sacrifice and effort to grow beyond our weakness.
Your Pussy is a Portal.
By: Serena V Amoroso
Tags: Body Positive, Womens Rights, Womens Health, Sexuality, Body Image

Let’s talk about your body part ‘that must not be named’.

Remember in Harry Potter how people were afraid to say Voldemort? It’s because when we are afraid of naming something it creates FEAR + POWER OVER.

I can’t even say the word here without being aware my post might get banned but here we go:

P. U$$Y.

YONI.

V. AGINA ( aka V. ULVA bc v. agina is technically incorrect… SEE we don’t even have the correct name for our anatomy culturally 🙄).

In this case, the lack of naming also creates SHAME.

SHAME + FEAR THRIVE IN SILENCE.

⚡️That’s what has happened with OUR BODIES AS WOMEN. The most natural, beautiful creations ever. When we feel shame + fear around our bodies it becomes a whole lot more challenging to experience and SHARE pleasure + Love.

You might even feel triggered or uncomfortable that I’m using these words.

👉It’s all a distortion to disconnect us from our bodies and from our POWER.

Yoni is a Sanskrit word for v. ulva meaning “Source of all Life”.

𝙎𝙊𝙐𝙍𝘾𝙀 𝙊𝙁 𝘼𝙇𝙇 𝙇𝙄𝙁𝙀.

Your yoni / p. u$$y / v. ulva is literally the space where consciousness is birthed into this world.

Whether it’s another human or the energetic birthing of an idea, this space is a 𝙥𝙤𝙧𝙩𝙖𝙡 𝙤𝙛 𝙙𝙞𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙞𝙩𝙮.

It’s time to WAKE👏THE👏F👏UP👏and 𝙧𝙚𝙘𝙡𝙖𝙞𝙢 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙝𝙤𝙡𝙞𝙣𝙚𝙨𝙨.

Do you realize how fucking powerful you are?

🔥love fiery Serena

@serenavamoroso

PS — connect with and LOVE your sacred portal with me in Feminine Magnetism. DM for info.
Hair Removal — Methods To Removing hair Temporary Or Permanent
Tags: Body Image, Face Care, Beauty Tips, Body Care

Almost app parts of the body have hair. Even the face has fine downy hair. It is when the growth is coarse and thick that it can present a problem, specially where facial hair is concerned. It can make a woman feel unfeminine and unattractive and can even become a source of misery. So, hair removal becomes very important part of beauty.

In most cases of excessive hair growth, hereditary factors play a role. Sometimes hormonal activity, or imbalances can trigger off sudden growth of unwanted hair. During menopause, for instance, facial hair growth can occur.

There are several methods of hair removal. Your choice would depend on the area from which hair must be removed. It is also essential to know the pros and cons of the various methods.

Shaving:

Many women choose to shave their legs and their underarms.

It is probably the quickest method of hair removal, but it has to be very regular. Because regrowth is very fast.

A stubble can appear within three days, or even less.

You should shave towards the direction of hair growth and exercise caution by applying a mild anti-septic solution, in case of nicks or cuts.

If there is bleeding apply ice to stop it.

You can also read about Skin Nutrition: Which Nutrition Are Good For Glowing Skin

Waxing:

This is probably the most popular method of removing hair on the body.

Read More Click Here:https://stayyounge.com/hair-removal-methods/
Body Positivity- The End Of Detrimental Body Stereotypes
By: Sujithra Gunasekar
Tags: Body Image, Self Love, Body Positive

The country’s economy is revamping, the education system is revolutionized, stock markets are fluctuating, people are recovering from the pandemic but mental health is at the downfall struggling to climb the ladder of optimism. What makes it so difficult? Well did the societal standards break the steps of the ladder making our mental health fall deeper into the dark cave? I’m afraid it’s true. But how standards and mental health are related.

A little throwback to the 1600s, where being attractive meant being healthy and vice versa, curves were praised, double chins were charismatic, people were happy with their bodies.

Jumping back to the present day, being tall, thin is the stereotyped or “ideal” body image. When these standards are not met, mental health decides to spiral, all hell breaks loose. Young girls and boys decide to meet these endless standards. However, the outset is optimistically built, later their subliminal is entirely filled with the gloomy demon — depression, stress. Kids are introduced to new terminologies that are not going to end well. Eating disorders overshadow, finally the precious life which needs to be fortified is at the edge of the knife.

It’s not the soul that should find peace, but the constant thoughts in our mind should hunt serenity. Our mind is the trickiest part of our body, but trust me it can be controlled with pals like patience, gratitude, and acceptance. To whoever is crying out there from not being able to tolerate the societal standards, I hear you. To whoever looks into the mirror and loathes what you see, I hear you. To whoever is shouting inside your head but not spill a noise outside, I hear you. To whoever finds pleasure in starving, I hear you. I also hear that infinitesimal positivity that’s clinging on to you. Help that positivity grow and excel, I promise that positivity will one day save your life. Blindly trust that positive instinct before it fades away turning you completely into a hysterical monster within.

Give yourself the time you need to heal the unfathomable wounds.

Just hear me, you are perfect!
A look Into A Teenager’s Mind
Tags: Body Image, Beauty, Mental Health, Teenagers

Hey, I’m LL, and I’m fifteen years old, and I’m one hell of a child. Just kidding, not really.

Chances are, you’ve seen some group of teenagers walking around at night, blasting music, and practically screaming at the top of their lungs just when you’re trying to settle down for a nice cup of tea and Netflix. Many of you might come across the familiar thought: Ugh, teenagers. And then proceed to reflect into the days when you were of that age, hanging out with friends and maybe, if you were lucky, having the time of your life. Then you might reflect upon how we should enjoy what is commonly considered the best years of our lives.

So all those thoughts? Get them out of your head. Preferably right now, so I can twist everything you were thinking of. DISCLAIMER: I don’t speak for every teenager. This is just one perspective. Okay, ready for the bomb to drop? Here goes: I’m convinced this must be the worst period of my entire life. And maybe this global pandemic has somewhat of a hand in it, but it’s these days that suck the most.

While I have friends, it’s not as if we’re out partying every night. Typically you’ll find me alone, drowning in homework and attempting to raise my grades while college stuff runs through my head on the daily. Our mental health? Ha ha, very funny. The reality, at least for me and many others, is that today’s societal standards combined with a world with very many issues people have only begun to care about now has caused so many lives to take a turn for the worst. Think of it this way:

I see in magazines skinny girls with big boobs and big butts, no belly fat, thigh gap, clear skin, shaved legs and underarms. Meanwhile, I’m trying to push against such standards. Then again, I have people (mostly older folks. Sorry boomers) telling us that if we show skin, we’re sluts. If we don’t, we’re useless. If you have big boobs, you’re a whore. But if you don’t, then you’re trash. If you want to have curves, you gain belly fat and then you can’t be skinny either. The double standards are just one of the many examples– when I was little I saw “perfect” girls on television, perfect this and perfect that. THERE IS NO PERFECT.

I think I completely trailed off here. Stay tuned for more, I guess…
If childbirth doesn’t get you, menopause will.
Tags: Menopause, Fashion, Feminism, Women, Body Image

I had been trying to squeeze 153 pounds of 46-year-old woman into jeans with a 28-inch waistband.

If childbirth doesn’t get you, menopause will. Your waistline will simply disappear. All those “relaxed” styles and elasticized waistbands will start to make sense. Having a hot flash while wearing skinny jeans or any tight-fitting clothing is a descent into hell.
Yes, please just shut up already!
Tags: Feminism, Women, Holidays, Body Image, Mental Health

Whether it’s at an in-person gathering with people in your quarantine bubble, or a zoom dinner party, resist the urge to make comments about how much (or how little) anyone has on their plate.

Yes, please just shut up already! Examining the amount of food someone has on their plate is not your business. As for compliments, a good one to say is: “I’m so happy to see you!” That covers all the bases.
Expectations to fit a body shape can ruin your self image
Tags: Body Image, Self Improvement, Self Love, Self-awareness

Expectations to fit a body shape can ruin your self image

We live in a world dominated by the media telling us to look a certain way. We all know this but how do we as woman love our bodies and not fall into the trap of comparison feeling the need to be on a constant treadmill to keep up with this false expectation

We all have different physiology and our bodies store natural body fat in different places. This is what gives us our uniqueness. We could blame the Barbie doll with her unrealistic waistline when this first started shaping our distorted perception of what we are supposed to look like by comparison.

We now moved on into a more sophisticated but perhaps more sinister form of this by comparing ourselves to photoshoped or plastic surgeoned woman or under some kind of belly reducing machine.

Don’t get me wrong Im not saying dont excercise at all and think you are going to lose the excess weight. But as your body changes love yourself and your body as it does. Have self care and self love.

Saying no and taking care of yourself is not selfish. Dont let anyone make you feel condemned or guilty for doing so. And if they are they got it all wrong and place too much emphasis on the wrong things.

Beauty is not just physical but spiritual and mental as well.

If you found this to be inspiring and a relief from this craze to look a certain way then do follow, recommend and subscribe.
Linea Nigra in pregnancy
Tags: Feminism, Linea Nigra, Pregnancy, Healthcare, Body Image

Linea nigra means black line in Latin. Many pregnant women have this vertical line that extends from the bikini line up to the bellybutton, and sometimes, even higher. It may or may not be accompanied by darkening of the face, belly or other parts of the body (chloasma). The level of discoloration visible varies depending on your skin complexion as well as other factors. It is usually temporary as it often appears around the fifth month but disappears within months after delivery.

What causes it?

We all know that hormones are all over the place during pregnancy. One of such hormones, oestrogen also stimulates the melanocytes in the skin, which are responsible for producing melanin, the pigment that darkens skin. It is absolutely normal.

What if I am not pregnant?

Linea nigra is sometimes found in people who are not pregnant due to overstimulated hormones If you are not pregnant and have this discoloration, you may want to have your hormonal profile checked because it may be a symptom of Addison’s disease or Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS).

What can I do?

Some creams can help, but be sure to check that they do not contain things that are harmful to your baby. You may want to use a natural lightener like lemon juice. Vitamin E oil as well as Cocoa butter have been noted to be help reduce dark lines and stretch marks. If you plan on exposing your belly to sunlight for whatever reason (baby bump shoot for instance), then you should apply sunscreen first.

Final word

The fact is that almost every woman, particularly of African descent would develop linea nigra in pregnancy. It is just one of those changes to expect. The good news is that it often fades away, even if nothing is done about it.

Do you have any pregnancy related question? Call or chat with a doctor on doctordial.ng
Thunder Thighs Carry Strength and Encircle My Lover
By: Arlene Ambrose
Tags: Identity, Women Who Run With Wolves, Women, Body Image, Poetry

Thunder thighs are for sturdy women.

My thighs are pillars of brass, ebony, cigar, and cinnamon sticks. Each sure step I take vibrates up to center me. These thighs are strength.

They steady the vessel of water balanced on my head. A long walk home, sun beating, tight leather on my skin. Black weathered straps.

They carry the lifespring. Sometimes buckets of tears spill over, but are never too heavy. I bathe my sorrows away. I replenish dry bones and dry souls. I quench my thirst for love, peace, and understanding. I quell fires of discord. I nourish my body back to youthful dance.

These thighs have birthed many children. Spreading, shifting, cracking to accommodate new life.

These thighs are used for sitting and rocking those children, being climbed on by those children, washing clothes, stripping corn, and shelling peas.

They hold the memories of unborn children. Pain held in my womb that radiates to my lower back and sides. I feel the fingertips dig into me. Hold me, swaddle me through it all- pain.

These thighs are my pleasure. They are the safe place called home. Soft brownie melt in your mouth, sweet. The low hum of a cello, the high shrieks of the violin. The comfort by candlelight.

Thunder thighs encircle my lover. Traps and clamps. I hunt, I release.

These thunder thighs create a gate, a sacred space to rest, yet allow freedom.

These thighs carry the continual power of my love.
My whole body feels off
By: Beth Nintzel
Tags: Humanity, Human Body, Body, Body Language, Body Image

Sometimes, my whole body feels… off. As if a slight degree of change from the projected timeline has happened and my internal clock is now attempting to catch up and catch up quickly.

The Biden presidential win was one of those times. It was a joyous day, but I’m not sure it was the day the timeline predicted would happen, or thought would happen. Was the timeline geared towards Trump winning a second term? I truly hope not, but on that glorious day when Biden became the projected president-elect, my entire body was… off. Like it was struggling to morph into this new, brighter timeline.

Is this a consequence of so many negative permutations that have been in our collective vibration for the past several years? I’m not sure, but I do know that I’ve felt this way inside of my own body on numerous occasions. It’s as if I’m no longer inhabiting my own skin. Not in a way where I’m floating above in some kind of out-of-body experience. But more like when Vincent D’onfiro’s alien character in Men In Black dons his ‘Edgar suit’ like he’s too big for the confines of his human cage — that’s what it feels like. I’m uncomfortable in my own existence at any given time or in any given experience, but more often than not, when that experience is a positive one.

And I’m just not sure what that means.
These Hateful Bones
By: Aaliyah Allen-Coleman
Tags: Eating Disorders, Body Image, Black Women Writers, Poetry, Mental Health

A Stream of Consciousness on ED

I want to scream.

Lodged in my lungs are spores of hate. I’d like to believe that if I can scream, loud enough, long enough, with enough force I can expel the spores.

I know this is not true. The hate is no spore, no visiting toxin.

No it is homegrown, native to my body.

It is in my bones, my muscles, my organs, and stitched across my skin.

I am a hateful thing.

The hate feels like fire incinerating me from the inside out. It feels like being eaten alive by shame and guilt, by disgust.

There is a shackle around my heart and a weight in my stomach, preventing me from escaping the disgusting weight of my body.

I am drowning.

Nose burning, eyes stinging. The thoughts are swimming.

They are so loud, a chorus of waves crashing into me. I cannot catch my breath.

I am going to die.

I am going to die in this prison, my body. My worst enemy, myself, will kill me because I did not do more, could not rise to the challenge of being perfect, so I must be punished.

What use am I if I am not perfect?

I don’t want to die, but I cannot bear the weight of my failure. It gnaws at me, eroding me. Soon there will be nothing left but these hateful bones.

I wonder will I find a way to love then.

When there is no excess flesh and fat to burn, can I love these thin hateful bones

Or is my wish to be smaller a wish to be nothing at all?

At night, I cannot tell the difference.
Changing your body always starts with changing your self image
By: Tal Shlafman
Tags: Lifestyle, Self Improvement, Weight Loss, Diet, Body Image

Change your self image = Change your body

Changing your body goes hand to hand with changing your self image.

Our self image is the picture of ourselves in the core of our mind. This image determines how we see ourselves, and thus how we feel and behave, regardless of the way we see ourselves in our current reality.

Your subconscious mind hosts all of your beliefs, programs, and habits. Whether you realize it or not, we all have a mental blueprint about ourselves at a subconscious level.

Our self-image is our conception of “Who we are” and “What are we doing in life”

Our self image has been built up and shaped by our own beliefs about ourselves. Lots of them are related to our past experiences, wins and failures.

To make quick sense let’s put it this way. All of your daily actions from the moment you wake up, will be influenced by the sort of person you conceive yourself to be.

Apply our self image to our physical body

If you are here, you probably interested in changing your body, or you want to change an aspect of your body in one way or another. Let me ask you this, why do you want to achieve your goal body physique?

You must be thinking to yourself, “I want to lose fat”, “I want to feel better”, “I want to look better”, or “I want to be happy with my body”. These are all good reasons, but there is also a reason why you feel like you always try and fail to do so.

It all comes down to motivation.

Changing your body is hard and takes a lot of courage and discipline. The problem with creating internal motivation is that we’ve never been taught to focus on our own goals. We’ve been thought to be great at accomplishing what people ask from us.

Did you ever stay up all night to work on your own goals? Probably not…but did you ever stay up all night to work on a school or job project? I know I did.

So, why not begin giving yourself a command?

Motivation is personal. Two people can achieve the same goal using different motivation and it is up to you to find yours.

Start with that… Write 20 reasons why you want to start the journey of changing your body and put it on your mirror. Read it every day from now on up until you achieve your goal and need a new list. This will help develop your self image of yourself as you’ll see the progress you’re making. If you think you don’t have 20 reasons, that is part of the problem. You never found the right motivation for you to start and finish the journey of changing your body the way you want to.

Reprogram your mind to change your body for you
My Confessions: How I Accepted My Body and Began to Love myself
By: Shruthi Sundaram
Tags: Feminism, This Happened To Me, Body Image, Beyourself, Love

I have always remembered myself as someone who was “overweight” (at least according to society’s standards). As someone who has a big butt. As someone who always had to wear clothes that covered everything so that I looked okay.

My childhood was filled with comments such as:

“Who is going to marry you, if you look so fat” or,

“Your health is going to deteriorate if you keep bloating up like this”, or,

“Eat lesser food, that is the only way you can become thinner” or,

“Do more work at home, don’t simply sit. Don’t you want to lose weight?” or,

“Bulldozer” or,

“Fatso”

… you get the point.

No, it was not my parents who passed these comments (most of the time), but everyone else everywhere. It could be my school, family functions/gatherings, neighbours etc.

There was a point of a time, where I dreaded going to these family functions or meeting specific people. Because I knew and was terrified of the comments they would pass. I hated them with all my heart. My reactions took two ways: I was either so hurt, that I would sit in a corner and cry or, I would get angry and storm off the room/talk back to them.

Sadly, both of these reactions seemed to affect me more than them. And it upset me even more. When I did talk about it to my parents, they asked me to ignore them and not talk back to them. Because they were elders, right? Worse, sometimes I was asked to reduce by my parents too.

I used to envy the thin people and could wear anything they wanted. When people called them beautiful or when family members appreciated them.

I had always been an emotional eater. I could stuff up any amount of junk to drown my sorrows. I was part of a vicious cycle. Reduce eating, hear comments from people, drown in food to drown my sorrows, get the realization that I should stop eating, reduce eating. And all this was during my teenage years (12–17 years of age).

Your teenage days are the ones where you are very high on emotions, right? Every comment — positive or negative that you receive creates a 10x impact in your brain. Your circumstances feel like they could make you or break you. I do not know if it happens to everyone, but this is what happened to me.
The Girl And Her Mouth
By: Daniel A. Teo
Tags: Life, Self, Eating Disorders, Body Image, Mental Health

In the waves of my battle

between own sentiments

frenzied attempts in trying to break free

from the never-ending cycle of gloom.

In cupped hands lies the food hurriedly swallowed down

only to be regurgitated out, seemingly untouched.

No one to hold my hair as

my knees are tied down like barbells onto moist ceramic tiles

till my barely healed over scabs start to turn brick-red precipitous from

the friction of rubbing the ground too long.

In my defiance, I also absolve of individualistic expression

and release the palpitations banging furious on my rib cage.

Weltering in the acute affliction of the ache, shattered emotions —

efforts of trying to get back up,

barren.

Through tears spilled from the agony causation

weave callous fingers into the patterns of a scroll

cup them together till they form an imaginative quarry —

an expanse of matter for your own expurgation

in an asinine attempt to block

the endless waterfall cascading down the unfathomable gap in my mouth

as the pungent stench of my own blood composed

of the day’s meal lingers the very atmosphere of stale air.

Place the index and middle finger and reach;

reach far back into the tongue

till you shiver and your eyes roll back from sockets

let hair stand in the tide of overwhelming irritation

and as you cower helplessly against

the vigor of the torment tide

Use the same fingers — the index and middle

to resemble that of the shape of a pistol

pull trigger

and fold yourself into a blank canvas

maybe when you open your eyes

paint the contemporary body.
Three Things I Love About Being Pregnant (That Took Me by Surprise)
By: Iva Koevska-Atanasova
Tags: Body Image, Pregnancy

Reconnecting with my body

Or, what I like to call, the revelation.

I’ve often felt alone and disconnected from my body in the past. I’ve dabbled in disordered eating. And I have no real perception of how my body occupies space and time. In my sense of self, where my body is supposed to be, there’s a gaping hole. My body is a stranger to me.

I tried to mend this relationship with therapy. I thought I had a breakthrough when I started lifting weights and I discovered how strong my body could be and how well it could function. But occasionally, I would lapse and become disconnected again.

Now, with the life growing inside me, I’ve never felt more in tune with my body. Or more in love with it. Or less lonely inside it.

My body is not a temple. No. It’s my best friend and my partner in crime.

I look at it in all its bloated, gassy, clumsy glory, and for the first time in my life, I love what I see. I don’t criticize its proportions. I am not terrified by its ever-growing size. I don’t mourn the disappearing definition of my hip bones, my clavicles, and my knees.

I just think to myself: “Yep, my body is growing a human and it’s doing a damn good job about it!”