How to Succeed at Your Own Speed
By: Robert Davis
Tags: Mental Health, Personal Development, Life, Success, Science

There’s so much potential for success in the world. So, what’s holding you back?

A fairly common answer is age. This year, I turned 30. To some, that means I ought to be settled comfortably into a life that will carry me to the grave. I must have a stable career, a family, possibly own multiple properties, etc.

And a quick browse on Amazon turns up several resources I could use to achieve these expectations. Books such as Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance, Good Luck Don’t Suck: A Tactical Guide to Early Success in the Workplace, and Unlock Your Career Success: Knowing the Unwritten Rules Changes Everything are available to anyone chasing this dream.

But, the more I wax poetic about these expectations, the less I describe the actual world I live in. Furthermore, the more I concede to these fantasies, the less control I retain over my life.

As stoic philosopher Epictetus wrote in his classic The Art of Living:

“Attach yourself to what is spiritually superior, regardless of what other people say or do. Hold true to your aspirations no matter what is going on around you.”

While easy to remember, this lesson is increasingly difficult to practice. Nowadays, learning to succeed on one’s own is a revolutionary act. It requires one to take a lonesome path, away from so many who are quick to offer advice or tell stories of how they found success.

Rich Karlgaard, the publisher of Forbes Magazine, posits that our cultural obsession with early success actually dissuades many from achieving success later in life. In his book Late Bloomers, Karlgaard depicts just how obsessed our culture has become with early achievement by citing a parenting article from the Washington Post about youth sports.

“Our culture no longer supports older kids playing [sports] for the fun of it. The pressure to raise “successful” kids means that we expect them to be the best. If they’re not, they’re encouraged to cut their losses and focus on areas where they can excel,” it reads.

But, this mantra isn’t just coming from parents. Karlgaard found evidence of this thinking in admissions applications from the nation’s top universities. Not only do they want “solid SAT scores” and “continually improving grades in challenging coursework, [but]” they also want students to be interested in “a few activities” and those who “go the extra mile to develop a special talent.”

Read: If you’re not quantifiably special, we don’t want you here.

Some colleges have taken steps to retract this philosophy. A report by The National Center for Open and Fair Testing found 85 of the country’s top-100 liberal arts colleges and seven Ivy League universities will be test-optional in 2021. This means students won’t have to take the SAT or ACT to be admitted. Instead, these schools will admit students based on a holistic application.

Moreover, adolescents are bombarded with similar rhetoric on social media. Some of the most commanding voices on these platforms are teens and young adults. Charli D’Amelio is dominating TikTok at just 17 years old, Corey Maison has amassed a huge following on Instagram for documenting her transgender life, and then there’s Billie Eilish. To this end, a poll by CNBC found that 86% of adolescents want to become a social media influencer.

So how is one supposed to rise above the fray when youths often portray models for success? What does success for late bloomers look like in a world obsessed with young stars?