Vanilla: Waving theWhite Flag of Goodness
Tags: Joy, Kindness, Love, Acceptance, Happiness

Rewinding life’s tape can be shattering emotionally but is both necessary and reaffirming. Revisiting the ghosts of mistakes past is agony yes, but if the agony was not there, then those God awful ghostly mistakes would still be haunting you through the occasional rearing of ugly heads. Wading deep into Vanilla-land means a profound sense of surrender. Letting go of what does not work is not unlike having a lucid dream where you are falling, falling…and falling, then finally in the nick of time, flying… up, up and away. The sense of letting go is a fearful sensation of epic proportions. Lots and lots and lots of stuff did not work and there is freedom in the falling away from all of that nonsense. Vanilla agrees entirely and Vanilla surrenders…falling then flying.

Vanilla is a safe space, a get out jail free card, a white flag and a mighty declaration of innocence: “Yes, I was wrong. I do not want to be wrong anymore. How can I fix this because truly, it was all my fault and I’m ready for something new.” Vanilla is quite like being a fat moth coming out of a cocoon, all squishy and slightly damp, waiting for your legs to straighten and wings to harden so you can fly away. There are no more distractions from your feelings as everything you feel is right there in front of you, no more withholding. The soft, naked underbelly of emotions fully exposed grants Vanilla freedom. Things are easier, less stressful, a great weight is lifted and authenticity is now possible where it had not been before.

Being Vanilla in a non Vanilla supporting world is exhausting. Letting go of pretending you are okay with so much that is decidedly not okay gives energy to fly. Now there is time and space to be real and to finally have truthful relations and communication with honest people who are also not hiding who they are or anything about their lives. Humans hide who they really are and how they really feel in order to be accepted and loved by the lecherous lemming masses. It takes tremendous courage to walk away from the darkness and to say with a gentle and quiet exhale: “I give in. This is not working and I want more”

Walking away from lechery and dysfunction does not mean criticizing those who are still caught up in the great lies they have to live in order to survive the modern world. We all have our own little or big walls that are built around us to protect ourselves from the seemingly scary monsters of society at large. Vanilla means tearing down those walls, waving the white flag, walking out onto the morning dew and declaring: “I was wrong, none of this was working, I want things to work now and I’m going to try something different.” That’s all. Vanilla relaxes and Vanilla lets go.

Have faith, you are not alone. Vanillas are everywhere, slowly waking up and unfolding their wings. A Vanilla may fall but in the falling and in the flying, will merge with a similar soul who wants the same degree of happiness and joy. One who has also been brave enough to have weathered the storm of letting go of what does not work. Their individual courage allows brave Vanillas to find each other. Through mutual tenderness and trust, strength is gained and surrender can be fearlessly explored together so that which is true, beautiful and good can be lovingly celebrated. Never give up on Goodness.