2020 Wasn’t the Problem. While we all experienced the struggles…
By: Sheriff Russell L. Martin
Tags: Law Enforcement, Leadership, Leadership Development, Hopes And Fears, Resilience

2020 Wasn’t the Problem

In 1965 James Stockdale, a Navy pilot, was shot down over Viet Nam and safely parachuted into a local village only to be captured and beaten. For the next seven years he would remain a prisoner of war, routinely tortured and subjected to horrible abuse. Upon his release he was often interviewed about how he survived while many POW’s did not. He indicated that it was important not to set deadlines hoping for release, only to see specific dates come and go. He stated that the POW’s who thought they would be out by a certain date subjected themselves to more heartbreak. His success relied on a daily discipline as he stated “You must never confuse faith that you will prevail in the end — which you can never afford to lose — with the discipline to confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.”

While we all experienced the struggles related to 2020, I am concerned that many are hopeful for a drastic change with the impending New Year. It’s not the year that has been the problem, but the circumstances that have occurred during 2020.

Like the exhausted distance runner we’ve got to keep going

I am optimistic that things will improve, but they will not occur over night. What helped people survive and possibly thrive in 2020 are the same practices that will make a difference when the calendar turns on December 31st.

Dr.Malarkey is the Director of Clinical Research at Ohio State University. I have relied on his insights on resilience for years. Early on in my tenure as Sheriff I brought him in to speak to my staff on the topic. Here are three keys he has shared that are supported by research in helping people overcome adversity and his PIERS support;

• A resilient life is marked by three qualities:

1) I stay positive in the face of adversity

2) I bounce back quickly in the face of adversity

3) I learn from adversity

• How do you grow a resiliant life? We must build deeply in our lives by sinking some deep PIERS into our souls.

P — maintain quality physical life. This means exercise and diet. Keep moving in some form. You don’t have to consider yourself an athlete, but you do need to incorporate some form of exercise. Denying yourself periodically when it comes to foods that may not be good for you is critical also.

I — develop an intellectual life. Never stop learning! Leaders are readers…and learners. Get off Facebook and into a real book. Trade 30 minutes of television or social media with reading or studying.

E — be sensitive to emotional life. Who needs to be forgiven or loved? How do I deal with disappointment or find joy? Don’t hang on to grudges and learn to let things go. Some folks think like the old record player where the needle is stuck in a groove. Dwelling on past slights over and over again is not healthy. Learn from hardships, don’t remain there.

R — grow quality relationships. You’ve gotta be a friend to have a friend. Make it a point to reach out to someone even in the midst of a pandemic. A quick call to a friend you haven’t spoken with in recent times may be the timely call they need. Connect on a personal level, not simply through a “like” on social media.

S — grow your spiritual life. We are physical, emotional and spiritual beings. Those who have an eternal perspective or think in terms of a creator often adapt better during hardship. Spending time in quiet prayer or at the least seeking spiritual truth can be life altering. There are a lot of Bibles collecting dust in a lot of homes

Optimism is not facing the reality of life, but looking honestly at it and dealing with the circumstances head on with an attitude that we will overcome. That doesn’t happen with a calendar change, but with a mindset and the practice of the habits noted above.

Keep pushing that rock uphill

Lastly, find something to be grateful for in your life. I’ve found it hard to grumble and be grateful in the same moment. 2020 doesn’t have to be the “lost year.” With the right attitude and frame of reference it can be seen as the year we realized what was really important, who is really important and how we’ve learned to deal with adversity.

Don’t just focus on the calendar turning, but on dealing with life one day at a time. There are better days ahead and there will be hardships as well. But right now what we have in front of us is today.