Young Change Makers: How Jessica Bird of The Serendipity Lifestyle Is Helping To Make A Difference In Our World
By: Sonia Molodecky
Tags: Social Impact

Thank you so much for doing this with us! Before we dig in, our readers would like to get to know you a bit. Can you tell us about how you grew up?

I’m afraid my growing up story isn’t easy to wrap in a pretty bow. It was messy! There was magic in it, though. My mom was 16 when she had me, and at that point she’d already begun drinking and using drugs. By the time I was 11 years old, my mom had three more kids, was at the peak of her addiction, and I had a violently abusive step-father. My dad was fighting for custody while I was dodging abuse and trying to raise my younger siblings… It was around this time that I first started writing, and in writing I found a world all my own and, perhaps for the first time, something worth sharing with others, too.

Forgiveness and philosophy came out in my writing, even at such a young age. I wrote about what must cause my step-father to be so abusive and my mom to care so little for us… and I wrote dreamy futures for my little siblings, the youngest at the time was just a couple months old. I wrote about the giant, beautiful lives I imagined them living one day.

My best friend had an even more abusive home life and I remember sharing my writing with her one time. It brought her to tears, and I could see the weight of the world fall off her shoulders.

Then, on a particularly bad night at home, I wrote up a story for my little sister to distract her from the violence we could hear outside our bedroom window. We got lost together in the world I created.

My dad eventually got custody of my sister and I, and his safe, peaceful home was a difficult contrast to adjust to. At 14, I was struggling to find my footing without chaos. I started to notice my tendency to run for cover even when there was no danger (something I still sometimes struggle with, even now over a decade later). My biggest struggle wasn’t caring for young children or finding food to eat, now it was simple. Do the breathing treatments required to manage my cystic fibrosis and keep my historically flawless grades up… Always unsettled, waiting for the peace to shatter into abuse like it always had before, I found peace in writing, once again.

In the midst of the abuse, school was my escape. I loved school and hated summer and holiday breaks. I spent my lunch hours inside with the English literature teachers or sitting with the kids nobody else would talk to. There was always a group of popular girls, and they were usually friendly with me, but I never fit in there. I had deep friendships with people from all sorts of cliques and groups, and ended up bringing people together who probably would never have talked except through me.

I didn’t know it at the time, but this was the beginning of my impact in the world.

Is there a particular book or organization that made a significant impact on you? Can you share a story or explain why it resonated with you so much?

Oh, that’s a tough one because there are so many! What stands out to me most in relation to making a change in the world is actually the high school I attended. I had the incredible opportunity to attend a public charter school in Idaho, Meridian Medical Arts Charter High School.

It’s actually a crazy story how it came about. Remember what I was saying earlier about starting to write when I was 11 years old? Well, just before that, my step-mom had been trying to inspire me to see a bigger future for myself during my weekend visits to my dad’s house. She was telling me about UCLA and how much I would love the San Diego area. (I wanted to be a gastroenterologist when I grew up, at that point. Probably inspired by something I’d learned during a clinic visit to manage my cystic fibrosis.)

One day, we were driving around and saw a new construction site… curious, we looked it up at home and discovered Meridian Medical Arts Charter High School was being built and was scheduled to open a year or two before I would start high school. It was going to be a public school, free, accepting 200 students maximum selected by lottery. Which meant I had as much chance as anyone, even though my family was poor.

The problem? It was close to my dad’s house, an hour away from my mom’s. I still remember the day I took the flyer home to my mom and told her about it, the flash of betrayal and grief I saw in her face. Still, I had a feeling this thing was going to work out.

The next year, my dad won custody of my sister and me. And the year after that?

It was time to apply to the charter school. There was an essay requirement in the application, which I was thrilled about! I had a chance to tell my story and ask for the opportunity I’d been dreaming about…

And I got my first rejection. Sort of. It wasn’t exactly a rejection, but there was only room for 200 students in the school, and I was number 280-something on the list by the time my 8th grade year ended.

I talked my dad into taking me to check the waitlist once a week all summer, right up until the very last day to register for the regular highschool. I was still number 256 on the list the day before… I got ready for regular high school registration in tears. It was possible to get into the school as a sophomore, but it was less likely and I’d be coming in behind. My dream was crushed.

And then, as I put on my shoes ready to head out the door to registration, my dad’s phone rang.

I could hear, “hello, is this Donovan? Hi, this is Cindy from Meridian Medical Arts,” and I errupted into tears without hearing another word. Turns out she said I was in, and could I come register today?

As a student at MMACHS, I learned all sorts of things my parents never could have taught me… things like how to use a planner and an agenda, identifying core values, and the how to evaluate sources of information for bias before putting together an informed decision.

I also saw for the first time how my troubled past didn’t have to define my future… and how, by embracing it rather than being ashamed of it, I could use the challenges I’d been through as a tool to help change the world.

The school was designed to prepare students to go into medical professions; by my junior year in high school I had about my first semester of college already completed through dual credit courses and was preparing for a CNA course… but it was in the language classes I really came out of my shell. In English 101, my first college level English class, as a junior in high school, I was asked to write a personal definition essay responding to Crystal Nacht by Ellie Weisel. He was a Holocaust survivor with very different views on the world than I had, but we both believed in monsters, and I focused on that in my essay, Seventy Times Seven Times. The essay was a tipping point in my life at 16 years old. It later earned me the Turn Around Scholarship and paid for my college. It lead my teachers to nominate me for, and I later won, the Mayor’s Youth Award as a result. It didn’t mean much to me at the time, but as I navigate the confusing waters of entrepreneurship and growing an organization designed to create a rippling impact, these awards have reminded me that the work I do matters and that people do see it, even when it feels like I’m in an ocean all alone.

My senior year at MMACHS, an article came out in the newspaper about an MMACHS graduate becoming a doctor at 26 years old and I remember the proud and loving looks in my favorite teachers’ faces as they read the article. I felt this knot in my stomach thinking one day they’d be as proud to have been a part of my journey. It was the same feeling I had at 11 years old when I saw the construction site I couldn’t have known would one day change my life.

By the time I graduated MMACHS, I had no interest in the medical profession. As a freshman, I’d wanted to become a hospice nurse after spending my 200 volunteer hours in nursing and assisted living homes and realizing that called my soul much more strongly than the sterile clinic experience I might have taken on as a gastrointerologist. But working as a CNA, I was exposed to lung infections and eventually ended up hospitalized myself. The reality of my cystic fibrosis making me more suceptible to illness became more real than it had ever been before. I was devastated that hospice wasn’t much of a future for me, afterall, but it tickled the seed of desire I’d always had to be a writer.

What resonated with me most at MMACHS wasn’t their mission to help people of all backgrounds become medical professionals, though that’s admirable. What moved me was the deep care the staff brought to their work. Every student in that school was seen and nurtured. We were all brought out of our shells and appreciated for who we were in our own unique ways. Trouble-makers were given love, not shame. Quiet, abused little girls in the back had their light reflected back to them by teachers with gentle hearts strong enough to hold space for reflection, anger, and healing. Rebellion was encouraged, in a way, but redirected into impactful and conscious transformation, rather than self-sabotage and drama without meaning.

MMACHS didn’t just foster the creation of medical professionals. They ignited the fires of future changemakers, real leaders in the world. My classmates and I graduated confident, curious, and determined. We saw the world a little deeper and with a little more courage. We were expertly trained to create innovative solutions and consider different philosophies and ethical approaches to any given situation. We were taught that our participation in government and politics could ripple, that we were The People and the future was in our hands.

It’s important that young people recognize their own incredible strength and power, because if we don’t believe in our ability to impact a change, it’s very hard to actually do anything at all.

You are currently leading an organization that is helping to make a positive social impact. Can you tell us a little about what you and your organization are trying to create in our world today?

My organization is out to show the world that strong and vulnerable are two sides of the same coin. Most of my income comes from my Pinterest marketing business. I thought this was a weird contrast to the vulnerable writing I’m known for, but 2020 has helped me to see that marketing is just another way of communicating and connecting people, it shouldn’t be gross and pushy. It’s no wonder I have such a knack for permission marketing!

When I wrote Seventy Times Seven Times, I explored this concept of what creates monsters in the world… and I came to the conclusion that the most difficult monster to battle was the little one inside each of us telling us that we are not good enough, strong enough, wise enough, important enough to make any difference.

That monster causes the most damage in the world, because it’s the reason people don’t speak up when they see injustice. It’s the reason they don’t change a toxic habit or remove themselves from a horrible situation. It’s the reason they don’t try to protect children from abusers. They think speaking up just once won’t make a difference in all the suffering in the world, and so there’s no point.

At The Serendipity Lifestyle, we believe differently. When asked how she was able to care so deeply for so many, Mother Theresa said she would simply focus on the one right in front of her. She knew what all the great heroes of rebellion and peace knew — that change begins in the family. It starts at home, with those nearest and dearest to us and the people we encounter everyday. (Including that lady in the office you can’t stand and try to avoid.) Change starts right where you are, and then it ripples.

The Serendipity Lifestyle is on a mission to wake people up to their own incredible power, to take responsibility, and take action to make an impact. Sometimes this means doing uncomfortable work, like looking at what you’ve missed taking action on because you didn’t believe in yourself, and then forgiving yourself and releasing that regret so that you can embrace your mission fully and have the courage and resilience to try again.

Can you tell us the backstory about what originally inspired you to feel passionate about this cause and to do something about it?

Serendipity is a word a lot of people love, but few seem to really understand. I equate it to universe and love, it holds a deep meaning to me. It’s like the butterfly affect, which says when a butterfly flutters its wings in one part of the world, the results can be felt on the other side of the globe.

Once I’d written Seventy Times Seven Times, it was impossible for me to ignore what I’d discovered in myself. The article pulled truths out of me I didn’t know existed, and I couldn’t contain it! I had to share. The more I shared my story, at first with my teachers and classmates, and later with the world through blog posts and now podcast interviews and published books, the more I saw the impact ripple. My teachers and classmates started reconnecting with estranged family members, healing old wounds, forgiving parents and grandparents and children… wherever I shared my story, people seemed inspired to go out and be honest and vulnerable, to take the chance of telling their loved one they missed them and wanted to heal things… and most of those chances paid of. And the ones that didn’t, still brought courage and closure and a renewed sense of strength and confidence. The power of vulnerable honesty was rippling through everyone who encountered my stories.

After publishing my first book, I received notes from people I’d never met sharing with me how the book had changed one of their friends’ lives and touched them too, without even having read it.

My own ripple proves to me every single day that when we are able to courageously bring our fullest selves and whole truth to the table, the world changes for the better, right then and there. And it keeps going.

Can you share the most interesting story that happened to you since you began leading your company or organization?

The most interesting story that happened for my company was the day I realized I wasn’t creating all by myself. I’d been blogging for years and, while my business was bringing in a modest income, I didn’t know there are much more I could do… until I attended an email marketing conference packed full of creators who, like me, created with impact in mind.

It was my first networking conference and I was all nerves. I’d been struggling with severe anxiety and a bad lung infection all year by the time the conference day came around, it was so bad I could barely leave the house without breaking down in tears. Not exactly the ideal time to go to a high-energy conference packed full of super motivated people! I was a wreck.

But once the speakers started, my nerves settled. I still felt like crying, but suddenly it was tears of relief and joy. I looked around the packed room and realized I was among friends. I remember thinking “these people get me.”

The connections I made at the conference are the reason my business is still alive today. ConvertKit hosted the conference and their incredible community and dedication to creators out to make an impact is a pillar of strength in my own company’s legacy. I’d been sending out lifeboats with my blog content for years and helping entrepreneurs reach their audiences for months, and when I was sinking in the storm, others out on the same mission as me came to my aid and lifted me up. I saw the precious power of my work in action, this time from the receiving side.

Months later, ConvertKit’s storyteller reached out to me asking if she could share my story. She traveled out to my RV home on the Oregon coast to interview me, and my work as a creator took on a whole new level of meaning and validation to me. It was the greatest gift anyone could have given me, and the ripple is still going.

Can you tell us a story about a particular individual who was impacted or helped by your cause?

One of the most difficult articles I’ve ever written was about politics and family. I wrote a letter to my grandfather addressing the betrayal that I felt knowing he’d voted to keep a man in office who publicly promoted the abuse of women and other horrible things. It was a terrifying thing to publish, but I knew that someone out there would benefit from the message.

I got a little bit of hate in response to the post, mostly from my own family. I also received dozens of messages from women of all ages thanking me for sharing. One stood out to me when she said, “I hated you for speaking my thoughts so clearly I couldn’t ignore them anymore. After reading your blog, I went to talk with my dad. It took a day for him to speak to me after I told him I agreed with you, and now he’s more considerate of who he supports. This morning, I caught him looking up ‘white privilege and how to help.’”

Global transformation starts at home with those closest to us. Seeing that my story helped ripple the conversation and shift just one household’s awareness was an incredible gift.

How do you define “Making A Difference”? Can you explain what you mean or give an example?

My mission isn’t to change the world by making headlines. I’ll leave the grand work to others, for me transformation happens within. It starts at home. It’s subtle, sometimes, because lasting changes take time and consistency. It’s a commitment to create an impact in the world.

When I think back to those I’ve had the opportunity to impact and who have shared with me in gratitude, celebration, and hope, it’s a humble sort of pride… because I know that they did the work. My definition of “Making a Difference” would be for future generations to know I was here not by recognizing my name, but instead in the way they live from one day to the next. In my vision of the future, young people are fearless in the face of their true feelings and desires, especially young women who are so often encouraged to stay small, demure, and polite. They’ll know I was here because they’re going to feel free and inspired to be wild, to feel their life with every sense present in the moment, and to make decisions from their heart.

Too often, people think young people make impuslive and careless decisions on whims of arrogance. I don’t believe this. There may be some mistakes made in the spirit of rebellion, but youth is a passionate time of deep caring and awareness. As a young person, I realize I am always learning and growing and I’m excited to take big leaps that allow me to gather more information for better future decisions. If we can make mistakes and be kind, compassionate, and considerate at the same time, then why not?

When I graduated college and started a business, I showed others who suffer with chronic illness that more was possible for them and that it’s possible to care for and honor your limitations while also living a life with a deeper purpose.

When I took the leap to leave my life behind and move out to the Oregon coast in an RV like I’d always dreamed, I showed my young sisters and other girls raised in poverty what was possible for the daughters of small town addicts.

When I published my book, Raped, Not Ruined and spoke directly to rapists and their families in a chapter, I showed other survivors what is possible when we release the shame and commit to the change we want to see in the world.

When we embrace ourselves without shame, we give others permission to do the same. That’s where impact begins.

Many young people would not know what steps to take to start to create the change they want to see. But you did. What are some of the steps you took to get your project started? Can you share the top 5 things you need to know to become a changemaker? Please tell us a story or example for each.

Inner work comes before most of the outter steps, but it’s easy to get lost in the inner work and use it as an excuse for not taking action… so the first steps I would advise young people to take toward creating a change would be to get really clear on the reason they want to make the change and what makes it so important to them. Don’t be afraid to get professional help. I’ve worked with therapists and counselors, life coaches, and business consultants to get to where I am today.

5 Things You Need to Know to Be a Changemaker are… (watch the video)

1) Your own core values.

You need to have a solid reason why. My mission is to inspire kindness and compassion in the world, and people argue with me on that. If people can argue with that, they can argue with anything, so make sure you have a solid foundation to build your change upon, that way you are able to stay resilient.

2) You can’t do it alone.

It took more than one person to create the problem you’re trying to solve in the world, and it’ll take more than one to solve it.

3) Pack inspiration everywhere.

If there’s a book or song that keeps you going, never leave it behind! Pull it out on the bad days and when you’re exhausted, and just lean into the feeling the creator of that work is trying to share with you.

4) Trust the process.

When you want to give up or back down, you’re probably really close to a breakthrough. Keep going, or just leave it alone, but don’t ever step back when it feels like this.

5) Rest, and let it be enough.

Change doesn’t happen overnight on a large scale. It’s a long game and you’re going to have to take breaks to be successful. When we’re young, we can push ourselves in ways that won’t work forever. It’s important to get in the habit of sustainable resting and nurturing routines on your journey to changing the world! The last thing you want is to nearly accomplish your goal, and then fall halfway back because you were to burned out to continue!

What are the values that drive your work?

The values that drive my work are creativity, equity, and kindness.

Creativity because I believe it brings out the deeply loving, empathetic core humans innately possess. When we are open to playing with life creatively, it’s easier to relax into our fullest expressions and share our best with the world.

Equity because I know very well from my own life that not everyone is dealt the same hand and, whether unfair disadvantages and privileges happen intentionally or subconsciously through societal values passed down over time, it’s important to be aware of privilege and consider the struggles we may be able to ease simply by having equitous intentions in place. In my personal life, this means sharing the benefit of the doubt in the face of misunderstandings and objections. In my business, it means investing in anti-racist education and continuously working to improve accessibility and operate inclusively to minority and non-traditional communities. I’m not perfect at it, but it’s an ongoing mission and core aspect of planning and strategy in my business.

Kindness because you just never know what anyone is going through. I believe kindness and “being nice” are different things — one keeps women small setting limiting standards that praise demure, passive behavior rather than actively compassionate behavior. Kindness, to me, means standing up for justice even when it’s uncomfortable. It also includes showing ourselves kindness on an inner level. How we treat ourselves inside will reflect and ripple through what we put into the world. For me as a changemaker, this means it’s important that I show myself grace and kindness along my journey, and not just when I’ve reached my goals and “deserve” to celebrate.

Many people struggle to find what their purpose is and how to stay true to what they believe in. What are some tools or daily practices that have helped you to stay grounded and centred in who you are, your purpose, and focused on achieving your vision?

This is where serendipity began for me, actually. Finding my purpose, I felt like I was constantly distracted. I was always trying something new, learning new things, and becoming knowledgeable about niche topics like herbalism, Pinterest marketing, and goat soap! It felt random and scrambled at first, but over time I learned that it was okay to have cycles of interests and to be continuously exploring and changing my mind about who I am and what I believe about the world around me.

When I forgave my purpose for being mischevious and embraced the wanderlust, things started to fall into place. To those who find themselves changing their mind a lot or struggling to choose between big ideas, I’d say to make a daily habit of writing down your goals and interests along with journaling about where you see yourself in a year.

There’s an amazing workbook called Artist of Life by Lavendaire that I buy every year. It has a section for reflecting on the previous year as well as connecting with core values and intentions for the coming year, and then each quarter and month there is a space to track your goals. The first year I used the workbook, I realized there was a pattern in my interests. 2021 is my third year using the book, and every dream I’ve put into it, I’ve made come true.

There’s a real power to writing down intentional goals and tracking patterns along the way!

In my work, I aim to challenge us all right now to take back our human story and co-create a vision for a world that works for all. I believe youth should have agency over their own future. Can you please share your vision for a world you want to see? I’d love to have you describe what it looks like and feels like. As you know, the more we can imagine it, the better we can manifest it!

Great question — and what a vision!

My vision for the world I’d love to see focuses a lot on the way that we connect in the world as humans. So much of the internet is very superficial and noisy, but with the pandemic bringing more awareness to our presence on social media, I’ve noticed an increase in mindfulness around technology and I think that’s a great step in the right direction.

In my vision for the future, youth understands the power they are capable of rippling around the world. Today, even children under 10 are commenting on YouTube videos being seen millions of times around the world.

In the past decade, we’ve heard hundreds of stories of youth being inspired to make a change and then doing it with the help of their local communities, news outlets, and social justice or health groups. Going forward with the technology we have today, youth has access to greater tools, massive global communities, and information to help them reach just the right people with their messages at just the right time.

In 2020, I built a course teaching human-honoring marketing strategies, much like the permission marketing the entrepreneurial world has been loving from Seth Godin for years now. From this angle, Pinterest inspires me to no end in the way that they invite and execute advertising on their platform. I’m not affiliated with Pinterest, but from my perspective and experience, the platform believes exploration doesn’t need to be noisy and disruptive and is most focused on delivering ideas to their users. The advertisements on the platform don’t disrupt their audience (like on other platforms where it can feel like everyone is trying to create the loudest, most attention-grabbing, borderline obnoxious post). Instead, they flow. It’s visually appealing and designed to inspire and keep the user exploring. The platform can track and reward users who create great content that gives Pinterest users a great experience.

In my vision of the future, all marketing takes place this way. People aren’t pushed and cornered into decisions and beliefs through noisy, disruptive advertisements coming in every direction. Instead, it’s search-based. I want to be part of the generation that uses data for good — to deepen connections and delight audiences, rather than making the world more noisy and lonely than it already feels for far too many people.

We are powerful co-creators and our minds and intentions create our reality. If you had limitless resources at your disposal, what specific steps would take to bring your vision to fruition?

Wow.

If I had limitless resources, I’d start with research. I want to know more about how data is being gathered and used and what fair use might look like. I know not everyone wants their data shared, and I have a lot of respect for honoring privay as well. This vision isn’t a small, quick change. It’ll require mutual understanding and agreement to make happen, so I’d focus on learning what the actual humans want as well as what my current options are when it comes to data and privacy. The goal here isn’t to force anyone into anything, it’s just to make it an option. Imagine a world where we could detox the ways we are marketed to, even though advertising could never truly go away.

Advertising can be a gift; when it’s done with care and consideration for the buyers.

While gathering data, I’d propose human-centric marketing strategies to top platforms and work closely with their developers and audiences to understand and execute changes gradually inviting more of this conscious marketing into the digital space. The great thing about a movement like this is that everyone is going to have their own take on it. It’s a global change I want to see, and my part in it is inspiring the shift and showing the data-driven powers that be how it can work.

I see a world driven by the power of love, not fear. Where human beings treat each other with humanity. Where compassion, kindness and generosity of spirit are characteristics we teach in schools and strive to embody in all we do. What changes would you like to see in the educational system? Can you explain or give an example?

I agree wholeheartedly. The biggest change I’d love to see in the educational system is more respect for the mixing of art and science… and equity when it comes to the quality of education given. I was lucky to get into a charter high school that focused on science and math, but by the time I was a senior in the most advanced math course the school had to offer, I was one of two girls in a class of eleven people. There were more girls than boys in our graduating class, but most of them were in lower courses than I was. This wasn’t for lack of work and understanding, it’s just an educational and societal system that tells boys to pursue math and science, and girls to focus on caregiving and softstuff.

I’m curious to see how the pandemic bringing so many children into online classes will impact the statistics in the coming years. This could be an incredible opportunity to relieve some of the inequity and bias, though there are still issues of racism and poverty to address for it to work.

Imagine a school system where art and science are more flexibly intertwined, encouraging exploration and curiosity, even in the realm of exact mathematics and science. Such a combination of data and humanity as a way of thinking from a young age could create the most versatile and intelligent generations in history. We’d see changemakers who an adapt and think outside the box from a young age and who ask questions and look at formulas and equations not as limitations, but as opportunities.

If you could tell other young people one thing about why they should consider making a positive impact on our environment or society, like you, what would you tell them?

Every single one of us makes an impact that ripples. Even if we stay small and silent, that’s a decision which has a rippling impact.

I heard a story once of a woman who was attacked in New York, and despite there being over eighty witnesses, not one single person dialed the police. When asked later why they didn’t call for help, every single one of them said they assumed someone else had already done it.

They watched this woman being attacked. Nobody helped, and in the end they all had to live with knowing they could have done something. Don’t be one of those people. Make your impact, speak up. Even if you feel small or if someone else is already trying or it doesn’t really seem that important, it’s a big world and there’s definitely someone else out there wishing and waiting to hear your voice among the crowd. Whatever you don’t do ripples just as loudly as what you do, so go for it! Live this one life you and celebrate every opportunity to learn.

Is there a person in the world with whom you would like to have a private breakfast or lunch, and why? He or she might just see this, especially if we tag them. :-)

Okay, honestly, Taylor Swift.

She inspires me to no end because she has been mocked and laughed at and just not taken seriously since she was a little girl, and now she’s the boss of music. She runs the empire, whether people like her or not. And she’s also an artist who really listens to people. She knows to trust herself, she’s not afraid to try new things and speak out about issues that matter to her. What she puts out into the world, she does with consideration for others but she doesn’t allow perfectionism to keep her silent.

I also have deep respect for the vulnerability that comes with making a change through art. As a writer, I can’t imagine having the entire world listening to my deepest thoughts on repeat in the form of music. Not only does she make a statement with her work, but when it’s finished she hands it off to the world to do with as they please. She brings out the feeling and creativity in everyone who gives her a chance, and I think that is the ultimate impact.

How can our readers further follow your work online?

I’d love to share a special piece of my world with your readers over at www.theserendipitylifestyle.com/thrive. I’ve created a short video to inspire changemakers there. I’m also on Instagram sharing my travel adventures and writing as @serendipitybird

This was very meaningful, thank you so much. We wish you only continued success on your great work!

Thank you for the opportunity to share. I hope this serves as inspiration and empowerment for our next generation of changemakers!