How To Gain Respect At A Younger Age
By: Matt Macgregor
Tags: Perspective, Life, How To, Respect, Life Lessons

Big talk… I know.

And even though I can’t claim to have 100% of the people I’ve met in my life respect me. I can say that I have had at least 1 person respect me… So, there’s your proof…

I feel that for everyone, there come moments in your younger life which act towards the transition from an adult with teenager insecurities to an adult with an adult’s mind.

Why?

Fearlessness

So, how I can explain this from my personal perspective is that when I was in University, I could feel the transition from teenager to adult. Not physically but mentally.

I believe that the added pressure of making the most of your time there, because it could have an impact on your future relationships and your future in your career, makes you push yourself out of your boundaries. I actively took on crucial roles not because I enjoyed doing it but because I knew it was essential in becoming who I wanted to be. I had to get used to the scary situations to then not be scared of them.

The other factor for transformation? I was now in a course that I chose because I was interested in it. And in doing that you take a small turn in direction away from the life that you had before. The foundations for your daily life that made you who you were when you were a teenager are now more tuned towards your personal interests and desires. No more school 5 days a week. No group of friends that you’ve been with for the last 6 years. No more collective identity that comes with your friends. I was now studying Filmmaking because I wanted to make films, no matter what my friends were doing.

So, with the pressure of achieving things now to impact your future and saying goodbye to that way of life before, you naturally get used to the idea of what your life is going to be like when you get older. Your focus changes as your surroundings are switched to little alarms that constantly remind you of what your future is shaping up to become.

Can I say that everyone goes to University after school or has had the same experience of their teenage years as me? Nope.

But this article is about how to gain respect in your younger years. Stay focused.

And with that I will now say that I believe fearlessness to be one way of gaining respect.

To be the one person in the room that says “I’ll do it” takes balls sometimes and when you’re the person that doesn’t want to do it but sees that person putting themselves forward you think, “Damn I wish I could have done that”.

You could have. You just need to block out that bastard voice Mr. Fear that talks shit to you and do it. Whatever it is.

Neutral Thinking

Right, I don’t even know if that heading makes sense but let me explain.

I hate the idea of closing an opportunity of human interaction, whether it’s just a conversation or a business venture, based purely on the fact that they’re older or younger than you. Because when it comes down to it, if you’re closing those opportunities off it’s probably because you feel like you have something on them. Like, you could say that I don’t want to speak to them because they’re too old. In saying that you believe that, due to your age, you can’t have an enjoyable experience in speaking to them. It works vice-versa but it’s bullshit.

When you open yourself to all possibilities that life can bring, you take on the ability to see everything for what it is, and when you do that you see that everyone’s just essentially the fucking same. Just different lengths of time being here.

But, how does it look to someone older than you if you, as a younger person, treat them as an equal? It shows that you’re not immature. That you don’t have the prejudice that a lot of young people have which in my experience has gained me some respect. And, again, it works vice-versa. When an older person gives me an opportunity like anyone else, no matter how much younger I am than them, it definitely acts towards me gaining some respect towards them.

That’s what I should have made the heading… Equal Thinking or something…

Doing Your Own Sheit (Shit)

With this one I think everyone kind of experiences it every other day. Like, when you go on Instagram and there’s this person posting their own stuff no matter what other people’s opinions are. There’s a wee part of you inside that respects them for it. When someone voices their opinion because it’s what they think, not because what everyone else thinks (Yes, it’s annoying sometimes. But, at the same time it’s necessary). A lot of the perks of our lives today are only so because of the people that stood up to how it was and believed in what they believed and surely you respect those awfully nice people that did that for your benefit. Huh? Huh?

I am sitting here thinking, though, that there are people that do extreme, harmful and extensive things, because it’s what they believe in, and in that respect. I wouldn’t really respect you if what you believed in was bringing a negative impact on people’s lives… But I think I’m getting a bit too deep here.

I just believe that when you can hold yourself in the way that you want to, dress how you want to dress; say what you want to say; do what you want to do (To an extent), it is respectable because it’s hard to do and it shows that you have self-respect. You ever heard that saying “If you can’t love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?”. I think it’s RuPaul… Big up RuPaul. That motherfucker does what he wants to do. Anyway. I’m going to change that quote a wee bit to “If you can’t respect yourself, how in the hell is anybody else gonna?”. I hope that works…

“Respect is earned, not given”

I’m just going to finish up on this. I hear this quite a lot and yes it makes sense and is true. But at the same if you can’t give respect then you shouldn’t expect it. Right?

All I want to take from this ,though, is that everything I’ve said in this article won’t instantly make everyone respect you. If you decide to walk out the door tomorrow in a homemade version of medieval armour expecting everyone to respect you because “You’re doing what you want to do”. Nah it won’t work.

All of these things are just things I’ve found in my time playing the game of life that contribute towards someone respecting me and giving me equal opportunity even though I am young, and I hope that these ideas can help to start the cogs turning towards someone not only you respect but others respect too, no matter what your age.