Five Fascinating Ways to Say “I Love You” in Medieval Europe
Tags: Relationships, History, Love, Culture, Medieval

Five Fascinating Ways to Say “I Love You” in Medieval Europe

This is how people expressed their love in Medieval Europe.

Photo Credits: The Best History Encyclopedia

The words honor and chivalry are heard most of the time in juxtaposition with medieval Europe, with knights in flashy armor challenging people to defend their beloved’s honor. It was a time when everything was romanticized to the highest degree possible, be it religious fervor, romantic aspirations, loyalty to the crown, or war.

That is why so many of these stories survive the test of time and live today in our lives, as feats that might be considered impossible today since everyone is divided by mostly self-fulfilling desires, and society has progressed to strongly believe in putting yourself first and things like love, religion and nationality second. However, today I will focus on love in medieval Europe, and look at five fascinating methods that were used to express it.

1. The Ivory Comb

Perhaps one of the strongest amongst these methods would be the use of an ivory comb. Ivory has a pure white and smooth surface and is a very beautiful material that is often used to depict angelic beauty and was one of the gold standards of female beauty for a very long time. The Parisian ivory comb was crafted in 1320 and was decorated with three distinct scenes describing lovers in a garden. The acts the figures are seen doing and their body language describe the process of new love, and how it blooms into a beautiful flower.

It was a very popular method of communicating romantic desire amongst the aristocracy. The most intimate facet of this romantic gesture, however, was when a man combed his beloved’s hair in a private moment, a scene that is often depicted in King Arthur era romances featuring Gawain, Lancelot, and Guinevere. Although a small number of these combs survive to this day, those which do are in almost mint condition which proves that the people who received these gifts valued them highly.

2. The Maiden’s Knight

This piece of romantic love was presented by a maiden to her lover and was a horse saddle. It was too delicate to be actually used and was used as symbolism for a gallant knight fighting for his lover’s honor. Traditional methods of doing so in the medieval ages were usually a handkerchief bearing the mark or the house of the maiden and were given as a sign of patronship and love.

The saddle from Tratzberg in Austria shows the courtly figures of two women sitting beside a young, bearded knight, one sporting a falcon and the other holding a scroll, signifying wisdom and protection. The piece was made using a wooden frame, covered with rawhide and plates of engraved bone. The figures are intoned with a beautiful German subscript, which reads,

“I hope for dear summertime; wait — be willing in favor of me; smile, love, smile.”

3. A Tool of Trade, a Commodity of Love

They might not look like grand gestures, but mundane items with emotions and memories attached to them are often more valuable. Spindles were a common sight in medieval Europe, and scores of women used them to spin yarn for personal use and commercial purposes.

They date back to as early as the 12th century and are found in Oslo. The deduction that this simple household item might have been used to depict love was made from the inscription on one of them, which said,

“Nikulás loves well the woman called Gýrídr, step-daughter of Pitas-Ragna.”

4. The Staff of Unrequited Love

Talking of mundane items in medieval Europe, how can one forget the topic of unrequited love? It was even more of a popular source of perpetual heartache than it is today back in medieval times. A plain wooden stick was discovered in the ruins of Bergen in Norway from a wharf, and it has the romantic and moving inscription that reads,

“I love that man’s wife so much that fire seems cold to me. And I am that woman’s friend.”

You can almost see the picture in your mind of a lonely and decrepit man whittling away the tale and sorrow of his one-sided love story on a piece of wood, and we can often relate with the idea of impossible love ourselves.

5. Le Channsonier Cordiforme

The beautiful manuscript of love songs commissioned by a French bishop called Jean de Montchenu is shaped like a heart when closed but depicts two hearts conjoined when opened. It dates back to the 15th century and contains poems and songs from 43 French and Italian maestros of the time, who composed them with great love and care. In the third part of the manuscript, a lady in the arms of a black-robed man is depicted, which might be a hint to Jean’s own love affair which motivated him to commission the manuscript.

Although these ways of communicating one’s love and desire might seem mundane and rudimentary in today’s era, they were the great symbols of their time, and inspire us today to go above and beyond in our quest for true love. Which one was your favorite?