How to be happy in love?
By: Siddharth Bhader
Tags: Self Improvement, Relationship Advice, Psychology, Love, Relationships

How to be happy in love?

How to be happy in love? There are nine rules to follow in order to have a stable relationship — the rest is luck. Siddharth Bhader Jun 17·4 min read

There are people who manage to have happy and stable relationships without (apparent) fatigue. And others that continue to always clash against the usual obstacles. How to be happy in love then? Is it luck or does it need some form of skill?

The truth, as often happens, lies somewhere in between: if you fall into the second category or are unfortunate that you have not yet met the right person for you, or you are doing something wrong.

How? If you fall in love in less than 24 hours, you despair after just a week of dating a guy or you don’t know the middle ground, the good thing is that to change your attitude just follow these ten rules.

For everything else, on the other hand, you just have to put yourself in the hands of destiny.

Ask yourself if you like him or your idea of ​​him

Do you fall in love with someone without really knowing them? Do you tell your best friend that he is the man of your life but you only dated once?

You may have to start wondering if you really fall in love with him or your idea of ​​him, and if your brain can’t handle more than one crush at a time, it’s likely an obsession.

Before asking yourself how to be happy in love accusing fate, stop for a second and give yourself time to really get to know the person in front of you.

Don’t throw yourself headlong into a story

Ok, you are an incurable romantic and you want to throw yourself into every story you live but maybe you shouldn’t give all of yourself and reveal all your cards to anyone who shows up on your doorstep.

Again: give yourself time to know who you are in front of and him to know you.

Don’t make it your obsession

Do you only talk about him, do you think only of him and your mood is determined by his actions?

Well then you are obsessed and not in love, especially if he has been in your life for only a few weeks. Don’t use the excuse that you’re sensitive because it doesn’t work, find yourself a new, healthier obsession, like the mountain.

Learn that the perfect man/woman does not exist

Your father is not perfect, Leonardo DiCaprio is not perfect and the perfect man does not exist.

Tattoo this thing in your mind and stop idealizing that kind of kid who doesn’t respond to your messages, imagine him in the bathroom in the morning when he is fulfilling his physiological needs, you will find him less attractive.

Learn that it is not he who must save you

He is not a superhero, superheroes do not exist and he was not created to make you happy, he will not save you from sadness, he will not write a song for you like “La cura” by Battiato.

In short, whoever does it alone is for three, be happy alone and do not make your balance depend on another living being.

Learn to accept the middle ground

I’m about to give you a shocking revelation, at the beginning of a relationship the middle ground does exist, and it’s not always all black or white.

For this reason you cannot be indifferent or madly in love with a person, in short, you will have to be able to feel something that is similar to a nuance, that is between total devotion and absolute indifference.

Don’t belittle yourself, you are better than him

There are beautiful and talented women who sacrifice themselves for the scraps of humanity and who often let them put their feet on their heads.

Amy Winehouse who had infinite talent got her feet on her head from that failed half-sock of her boyfriend.

Learn to judge yourself with clarity and consequently you will judge those in front of you in the same way, a step that teaches you to love yourself and protect yourself.

Stop communicating emergency

Sometimes you want and need a love story so much that you communicate an emergency, you are like an apartment alarm that doesn’t want to go off.

Know that there is nothing less attractive and more frightening in the world for a human being of any sex: stop it now or you will drive them all away.