Two Guys Talking at a Bar
Tags: Relationships, Breakups, Heartbreak, Dating, Fiction Friday

“What are you writing about?”

“Are you talking to me?”

“Yeah, what you writing about?”

“What I always write about…”

“Well, what’s that?”

“About a relationship that never really was.”

“Why do you always write about that?”

“I write about what happens and that tends to happen.”

“And how’s it coming along?”

“The page was blank til you showed up.”

“How’s this one going to be different?”

“I’m writing it backwards. I read this book over the weekend where this veteran watches war movies in reverse. All the destruction, buildings and people are put back together, guns and planes take back their bombs and bullets. Soldiers march back to their planes and ships and return to parents eager to embrace their children. It’s a happier ending.”

“That’s an interesting way to look at it. So, starting with break up?”

“Starting where we left off, I’m on the counter top as she pauses at the door and looks at me like I’m oblivious to how great we could be, waiting to see if I’ve got anything else to say, giving me one more chance; all I can bring myself to say is I’m sorry. She can’t believe it and shuts the door. I’m left there questioning if I’ll ever know what I want before it’s gone, if I’ll ever want to be with anyone, if I’m capable of being with anyone?”

“You’ve never felt that?”

“I haven’t, all I know is that I wish I did, because I probably wouldn’t be here with you right now, writing this. You?”

“I was engaged once [he looks to hand where his ring would be], she’s all I ever wanted. She hesitated when I asked, not exactly the reaction I expected, but she said yes and I assumed it surprise caught her off guard. She wasn’t in a hurry to set the date. At the time she was starting grad school and I was working on the road, striking up conversations with other guys, like you, at the bar by themselves wondering where they went wrong and I thought I had it figured out.”

“What happened?”

“We considered a small destination wedding, after graduation. Not a big deal, nothing like the wedding of her dreams she told me about years before. She couldn’t decide on a place, kept pushing back the date. Then, she finally made her mind up, she called it off. And I should have known better, I should have seen the signs when I’d be the one to bring it up. Sometimes I wonder if we’d still be together if I hadn’t brought it up. She said she didn’t know what she wanted, she had always been wrapped up with school and working that she didn’t get to experience life and she wanted to, but didn’t want that with me… and I don’t know if there’s anyone else I’ll want that with.”

“Shit…”

“But, I’m glad she ended it, glad she finally made up her mind, and it hurt like hell, still fucking does. But I’d rather have this right now, than still be with her thinking we were fine and dandy, meanwhile in her head and heart, she’d be happier with someone somewhere else. Enough about that, I’m good now and I still love her and I know she loves me, it’s just different. Your story though, how’s it going to end or how’d it start?”

“Ending with us leaving little notes on each other’s car windows to say, “hey” and our fingers cautiously intertwine while we lay panting in pools of sweat, side by side, finishing a hot yoga class and a single thought comes to mind, I’ve always wanted this.”