About Me — Mandy Osterhaus Ream. Captivated by the power of sharing…
By: Mandy Osterhaus Ream
Tags: Introduction, About Me, Teaching, Books, Writing

About Me — Mandy Osterhaus Ream

The author listening for a story. Victoria, Canada.

I was a hyper child. I spent a lot of time in my early teens creating a list of synonyms for hyper.

Effervescent. Enthusiastic. Gregarious. Energetic.

I was, and still am, quite enthusiastic.

The author being enthusiastic.

When I cleared my 20’s and celebrated my 30th birthday, I was certain I had “arrived.” Complete self-actualization would descend any day.

Then, after ten years of therapy to understand my anger and anxiety issues, after a triumph over infertility, the birth of two boys, one with Down Syndrome, a break from my life-love of teaching, and navigating the first fourteen years of marriage, I reached my fortieth birthday CERTAIN I had done my work and was now settling into self-actualization.

Then, I agreed to be an elementary school PTA president.

More therapy.

This led me to medication for anxiety with a dab of depression and I concluded I simply had to return to teaching college students for my sanity. It is one of the great joys of my life, teaching college students. That and being in water.

Although I have taught at different types of colleges, I am now, and forever will be, a fan of community colleges, specifically the one where I teach in the Communication Studies department. A few years ago, I was handed two sections of Gender Communication, a new class for me, and it has been a deeply profound journey into understanding the complexities of gender and identity in new ways. This has also offered me the opportunity to develop new categories of empathy as I humbly hold the stories of my students.

Along with many educators and students, I jumped into the wonderful world of teaching on Zoom this year and survived…barely. Mostly because I started wearing red lipstick.

Now, with my 48th birthday mere days away, I am clear, without a doubt, and with some grief, that I may not actually reach complete self-actualization. And the goddamn cliche is true.

Life is a journey, not a destination.

So, I recently found some beautiful photos I took of paths in England and Hawaii and put them in my dining room to remind me to keep walking.

Path in gardens at Blenheim Palace, UK. Photo by Author.

Part of the journey now consists of learning what it means to be enough. I hear those words a lot and I would love to know what that feels like.

The journey also consists of writing. The actual writing has been a part of my life for a long time. The “putting it out there” is newer. Now the floodgates are open and I can’t seem to stop.

It is exhilarating.

I am not journeying alone. 24 years ago, my life partner seemingly dropped out of nowhere the weekend I met him when he was visiting friends in the Washington DC area. And those friends were my next-door neighbors.

He was a fireman (truly the first one I ever met), gorgeous, and reading Dante’s Inferno.

Why hello. I’m Mandy.

We have had incredible ups and downs (which include my homesickness for Virginia while living in California) but we share a great dedication to one another, to our boys, and to our brand: the Ream Team. (It’s cheesy. But it works.)

And we play Scrabble. Complete with a fifteen-year record of our seven-letter bingos written in the box top. I married a man who is also interested in words.

He’s aging well.

The author with her husband.

Books are a critical part of my journey. Since childhood, I have had a novel or memoir on my bedside table almost every night. I get twitchy when one isn’t there.

I save other non-fiction for daytime reading or listening while I walk or do jigsaw puzzles. Sometimes I have to take deep breaths when I think of all there is out there still to read.

Perhaps the most important work in my life, in teaching, in parenting, in reading, and listening is understanding other people’s stories, particularly those that differ from my white suburban background. My parents started this work in me.

My boys. I keep typing and deleting sentences to describe them. They are remarkable. So much so that I have trouble, well, even remarking about them.

Back to books.

Of course, with books comes favorite authors and I stalk one, David Sedaris, every summer when we visit the North Carolina shore. Fear not. It is all above board.

We Reams have a family phrase that is uttered for a lot of reasons. To practice gratitude. To be present. To honor being together.

Sometimes when we’re all on the couch or at the beach or eating a good meal with good friends, my husband or I might ask, “What is this?”

And one of the Ream Team will reply,

“Good living.”

Yes. Yes it is.

**A special thanks to Quy Ma for this opportunity to contemplate who I am while searching for pictures of myself being enthusiastic. I now read a few “About Me” stories every night before bed.