JACK and JILL (My girly crush)
By: Damilola A Dahunsi
Tags: Teenagers, Young Adults, Mothers, Teens, Parents

JACK and JILL (My girly crush)

I wonder why Jill tumbled after Jack. If you ask me, Ill say it was love!

Many of us had that special crush when we were little. For some, it was boyfriends. When I say little, I mean little. Little, like kindergarten little, primary one little... Don't even argue about it. I bet a lot of people still have it in their head that children know absolutely nothing. They think they are completely innocent to know those kind of things or to have feelings. As a result, many parent don't monitor their little ones and ask them questions. They wait until the children are about thirteen years old before they begin to worry, monitor them and ask questions. However at that time, the children might have gotten to know too much of things that provides them with negative energy which produce wings for them that allows them to fly.

Oh my... I think I have gone too far without sighting any example. Okay let me tell you this. I bet you are gonna laugh. Of course you can laugh but know that I am telling the truth! Talking about little children's crushes and boyfriends, I had one. No wait... It wasn't one. I had a crush in kindergarten, I can't remember his name but I remember that of primary one. His name is Daniel. I won't tell you his full name, so that you won't go searching for him (laughing). For my junior sister, hers was Irhogbosa in kindergarten one and two. Sorry about the name, that's the best I can try. I can't spell his name. At least I remembered it. For my junior brother, his was Jumoke in nursery two. My elder sister had too. I think it was Damilola in primary four and five.

Many children forget about their kindergarten and primary school crush as soon as they left for secondary school. Some got a new crush or boyfriend in the junior, another in the senior secondary and yet another after senior secondary. For some, just like Jill, they tumbled after their Jack. You may want to know if I had any Jack. Yes I did but I'll tell you one truth, I mean secret (don't tell anyone). I had two crushes before I finally found my Jack (okay it wasn't a secret after all. I had mentioned the crushes earlier. Oops).

He was the son of my mother's friend and I have known him since I was three or maybe four. Oh, I forgot to say that he was also my crush too. So that means I had three crushes only one turned Jack. You may want to know his name, okay I'll tell you. His name is Tubosun.

At first I was head over heels in love with my primary one crush, so much that I would dream we got married. I was always thinking about him but he never seemed to notice me. He was interested only in two girls in my class whose names were Inkiru and Jennifer. Those two girls were the beauties of my class. I mean in the whole of primary one mango. I was always jealous whenever I saw him with them. In fact his seat was right beside Inkiru. Of the two girls, Inkiru was more beautiful and so I envied her the most. The two girls were light skinned and always made fancy hair to school. Everything they had including stationaries and lunchboxes were fancy. I always wished I had fancy things like that. I always wished I wasn't brown but light skinned. I thought if I had a light skin, and fancy things, my crush would spare me a glance at least.

At that time, I felt my mum was wicked or maybe she doesn't just know what it was like to be a girl. Did you ask why? I'll tell you why. I tried severally to persuade my mum to get me fancy bottles and food flask but she insisted on getting me those grandma-looking bottles and flask. She tried explaining to me that they were the best because they would last longer and also keep my food warm and well-preserved. I was agitated but I dared not express exactly how I felt.

The times I mostly felt inferior to those girls were during the holiday lessons. You know, the lessons afford the student to do away with the school uniforms and so you can guess what, those girls literally turned the school to a fashion show! They dressed in flashy colors and amazing styles that I could only have in my dreams. In school, I dared not mix up with them. As a matter of fact, they would never accommodate someone like me in their midst. The two girls were very close, and whenever you see them with other girls, it seemed like it was a great opportunity for the other girls.

I can't remember if I ever spoke with them. I really can't remember because at that time, I knew I felt inferior to them but I never gave people the chance to trample on me. I guess I had done enough trampling on myself so I didn't need anyone to help with that. The only thing I could beat them at was reading and spelling. While they were good with sums, I was better at reading and spelling. Although, I didn't want them to trample on me and I also hated the fact that they had the attention of my crush, deep down, I wished I could be their friend. Finally, when Inkiru left, sometimes I would walk past her street and wish I could see her by chance.

Okay, enough of Inkiru and Jennifer. I was actually trying to say that I sulked at the fact that they stole my crush Daniel. I was so infatuated. I know what I am saying, for those of you thinking about what a 5 years old girl knows about infatuation. Yes, yes, I was five years old and I was in primary one and I was infatuated with Daniel. At home, after getting home from school, my first thought would be of Daniel. I couldn't just take my mind of him. I would imagine that we kissed. Sometimes, I would imagine myself sitting on his laps with him whispering into my ears saying that he loves me. I will tell you not to underestimate the thoughts of a little girl and because of that, adults should be careful of things they say or do in their presence.

While I was in primary one, I remember that everyone in my class already knew the meaning of sex. Then we would roll our eyes and squeak in delight when we hear anyone say the word "fuck". I remember a particular day, it was during the weekend, and I was in the sitting room daydreaming of my crush. I took a pen and wrote on a particular wooden safe. The words I wrote says, "I love Daniel very much." Actually, I included his surname in what I wrote but since I have promised not to reveal it, I didn't include it in here. As soon as I wrote it, I heard the footsteps of my mum approaching the sitting room. I quickly cancelled what I wrote by coloring it with my pen aggressively.

So why did I try to cover up what I wrote? I was five years old and I covered up the words "I love you Daniel..." why? Yes that's because I knew I did or I was doing something wrong. I knew that it wasn't bad to love someone. In fact it is a very good thing as a Christian but I could differentiate the kind of love I had for him. At that time I might not know that the love I had for Daniel is called infatuation but I did know that it was an ungodly kind of love. Maybe it would have been okay to speak to my mum about it but would she have handled it well? This questions parenting skills.

One thing I am very sure of is that if I had told my mum, I would not have gotten any advice neither correction, I would have gotten severely disciplined. I mean I was sure to have received a cut in my private part with pepper added to it for a more stinging effect.

This is not to say that some parents are deliberate about parenting the wrong way. It is simply ignorance.

To be continued

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