Can An Older Person Avoid the Medical Merry Go Round?
By: William Seavey
Tags: Coronavirus, Wellness, Healthcare, Medical, Doctors

Photo by Bill Oxford on Unsplash

by William Seavey

There is a saying that “old age isn’t for sissies.” I would like to amend that with “older age isn’t for prissies.”

By that, I mean being a complainer as you age — that is, drawing attention to every ill and limitation you have (especially to your spouse) can be somewhat self-defeating.

Recently, as I contended with a raft of doctor’s visits (I am 73) it occurred to me that my life was becoming a “medical merry go round.” I don’t know who described this first in such a way but it seemed entirely appropriate. I’m sure many older people feel this way, even recognizing that doctor’s visits have become a major part of their daily lives, though not something (I hope) to look forward to unless you are a bit of a masochist.

Call me deluded or in denial but I really feel pretty good most of the time. I play tennis regularly and hike. I don’t have any obvious disabilities. I have sex (blush) regularly with my wife. I belong to a dance club. I don’t have aches and pains in general and sleep well.

Yet at my age I am regularly seeing the g.p. for check-ups, the heart doctor, the dentist, the eye doctor etc. etc. I recently was fitted for hearing aids and was diagnosed with bladder cancer (and had surgery) — something many men my age get but is not well understood as to the causes — and upon conclusion of the surgery I felt weakened for several months but popped back to feel nearly 100% of my former self and resumed my physical activities at that point — even while recovering from the effects of anesthesia (brutal).

Of course, my wife, bless her heart, is who makes these appointments regularly and makes sure I get to them. Men, in general, have a reputation for not taking care of their health very well. But I must insist that this hasn’t been the case with me — I never smoked, drank, rabble roused in general or attended loud rock concerts (the hearing problem is inexplicable). I put myself in a few dangerous situations in life — was attacked by a bear in Yellowstone Park and hitchhiked across the entire U.S. as a young man, but I survived both with no ill effects (well, the bear got my foot, without serious injury.)

So is this Medical Merry Go Round unavoidable? Should I put my (still good) foot down and just say no to some visits my wife insists on? (Maybe at the peril of my marriage?) Dare I point out that even doctors are in the business of MAKING MONEY and have incentives to keep you going back regularly? (During the coronavirus pandemic many have been avoided for fear of encountering fellow patients with contagion, and surely their practices have been affected).

FYI, I would never suggest, of course, that if you have symptoms of COVID-19, that you stay home to try to lick them. (But I certainly don’t). I read recently that in Mexico people are afraid to go to hospitals if they feel sick because they are seeing too many of their friends and relatives die there — as if the hospital was the cause…

So for me, the issue of how many doctor’s visits I should have to go to seems a matter of balance. Why should I go to the heart doctor if I know (in my heart of hearts) that my heart is sound? Some time ago I was put on a treadmill by one who kept upping the speed and insisted I stay on it until exhausted. Rather than have a heart attack from such exhaustion, I finally told him to stop the machine and let me off! (He did).

So doctors aren’t always right any more than patients are to avoid them in general.

I worked once in the health field (for an HMO) and wrote articles about prevention. I certainly believe in it, but more so in terms of getting exercise, eating the right foods, having good relationships, avoiding pollution (like the smog I grew up in L.A. — I moved to Oregon and even became a runner). Doctor’s visits make sense when you think something is wrong with you, and of course, if there is something that COULD go wrong due to aging — like heart and lungs.

I admit that it helps to have an advocate — like a spouse — especially if you are a male!

Will I personally ever get off the Medical Merry Go Round? Admittedly, probably not. My wife is even more stubborn than I can be at times. And aging just leads to more doctor visits.

But if someone once described going to doctors as a Medical Merry Go Round, then there must be one — for some people.

William Seavey is a retirement consultant based in a California small town, see williamseavey.com