How to Become a Meditator
By: Lynn E. O Connor
Tags: Stress, Meditation, Psychology, Practice, Mindfulness

By this time, many readers of Medium have probably put at least a toe into the cooling waters of meditation. But for those of you who have held back, reticent about anything that’s “spiritual,” or at best ambivalent about anything some call “woo woo” — right now is the perfect time to try it. There’s nothing magical about it; meditation is supremely practical.

You may be surrounded by people who already meditate and they may have made it sound mysterious. It’s not. Meditation is not hard. It is not really unfamiliar, in a way it’s something you already do naturally, only you never thought to call it anything.

There are flocks of fine meditation masters, gurus, and teachers. If you like meditating, you might want to join a group, find a teacher or join a meditation circle. But why no try it out at home, on your own, before going anywhere. Why not see what it feels like. Meditation is something you can learn, right here, right now, today. Just keep reading

You can do it, your friends can do it, so can your partners, your parents, grandparents, children, grandchildren. You’ll soon be able to teach them. Meditation is for everyone.

When you learn to meditate you are using your conscious mind to change your brain. We know from multiple studies, when you learn to meditate you’re slowly re-wiring your brain. We all want transformation, we want to feel better, be better. Learning to meditate and making the decision to have a meditation practice is one of the simplest ways to do that. But before we talk about commitments, you have to try it out so you know what “it” is that you’ll be doing. If you still need encouragement, meditation practice may make you less anxious, better able to handle your stress-filled life, and it might even make you happier. Try it.

If you’ve read this far, chances are you’re interested, curious, and a little worried that you won’t be able to do it. Perhaps you’ve never been able to sit still and it looks like people who are meditating are just sitting there. I promise you, you can learn this. It’s literally as easy as breathing, because the thing you are doing while you’re learning mindfulness meditation IS breathing.

Photo by Josh Marshall on Unsplash

Step One: Mindfulness of the body

Sit in a comfortable place — a cushion on the floor like the meditators you’ve seen, or on a chair, or your living room couch. If it’s too uncomfortable sitting, you can lie down.

The first thing you’re going to do is to focus on your body. Mindfulness just means “paying attention” and by looking for and finding the best, the most comfortable physical position, you’re learning to focus on where you’re directing your attention — to your body.

Are you comfortable? Are you relaxed? Think about your legs — strange as self-talk may seem, ask your legs: “Legs are you in the best position possible, are you comfortable?” Do that all over your body — your arms, your shoulders, your back, your face. Imagine each part of your body, see if moving it around, you can find the most comfortable position. The goal here is to find maximum comfort while you’re learning mindfulness. By focusing on each area until you’ve found the right position, you’ve been doing mindfulness meditation, you’ve been paying attention to your body, you’ve been mindful of your body.

Try to relax every part of your body, paying attention to how you really feel. Physical relaxation feels great, we all know that. If you sit in a painful position when you meditate, you’ll soon hate meditating. If you’re in chronic pain, find the best position you can, at least keep pain at a minimum.

Step Two: Mindfulness of the breath:

After finding the best position, and relaxing, move on to your breathing. Breath naturally, the way you usually breathe. Look for your breath. Do you feel your breath right under the tip of your nose, or do you feel breath lower in your chest, or abdomen? Feel your breath going in as you inhale, feel your breath going out as you exhale. As you focus on your breath, you’re meditating, with mindfulness on your breath.

Almost immediately — I mean that literally, within a few seconds — your attention will probably stray. In fact, since you’re just learning mindfulness — to pay attention — you probably won’t notice it immediately. But then you’ll remember: “Hey I’m supposed to be paying attention to my breathing.”

That’s the magic moment. When you’ve become aware that your mind has drifted and you’re thinking about something else, you can bring your attention right back to your breath. That’s meditation.

This is the practice we call “meditation practice.” You’re “practicing” noticing your attention, you’re practicing dragging it back to your breath.

Don’t worry when you notice your mind drifting all over the place. Don’t think “I’m not doing it right, I’m not focusing on my breath.” Everyone does that, our minds are thinking and feeling machines. As soon as you notice your mind has drifted to something else, when your mind has dragged your attention elsewhere, just keep bringing your focus back to your breath. People have called this thing our minds do, the way we drift almost instantly away from our breathing, the “monkey mind.” Our minds are always all over the place. In meditation,we’re practicing directing our mind’s attention.

The action that is most important for “rewiring the brain” is learning to notice when you’ve drifted away from paying attention to your breathing. This moment of noticing that your mind has drifted is what is meant by being “mindful.” As soon as you notice your mind has gone off into one or another thought or feeling, bring your focus and attention back to your breathing. Start again, focusing on your breathing. This is where the magic happens. This is what you practice. This is meditation.