Basil the Barbarian (4). Basil always found new ways to amuse…
By: Lm Botha
Tags: Personal Essay, Life Lessons, Pets And Animals, Humor, Cats

Basil always found new ways to amuse us, keep us on our toes, and horrify us.

Basil in tree — photo by Nobby’s Photography

This is part 4 of Basil’s story, links to the previous essays are available at the end of this article should you wish to catch up.

I had beautiful white curtains hung throughout the house. I find a light, monochromatic colour scheme soothing but Basil apparently doesn’t approve of my decorating choices. He did not take long to discover that the curtains moved, they were also handy for hiding behind so he could ambush whoever came within striking distance. The fact that his tail was always sticking out and giving away his hiding place is beside the point.

We were fine with him using the curtains for ambush cover, it was cute and some harmless fun for him. However, that wasn’t enough fun for Basil. His idea of fun was to run zoomies through the house, yelling that he is the FASTEST and ZOOMIEST cat in the house, maybe even in the world! The final room he zoomed into was always my bedroom, with perfect timing he would launch himself into a graceful leap and land halfway up a bedroom curtain, clinging with his claws. He would then climb to the top of the curtain and just hand there with his claws leaving wonderful little holes in the curtains I loved so much.

Again, neither negative nor positive reinforcement had no effect. I just gave up the fight, the curtains were already ruined so what was the point of upsetting both of us by trying to bend his will to mine. Basil would often hang from the curtains for as much as 20 minutes at a time, I got used to it and just accepted it as another Basil ‘thing’. This was beyond my experience, none of my other cats had ever done half the nonsense this cat got up too.

Basil being adorable — photo by Nobby’s Photography

Hubby came into the room one night when Basil was pretending to be a bat, hanging from the curtains, he saw Basil and wondered aloud whether it was a good idea to let him run wild like that. I just shrugged and said, “it’s Basil”. Hubby nodded sagely and it wasn’t mentioned again. I got rid of all the curtains when we moved to a new house, now we only have blinds on the windows but definitely not venetian blinds. Luckily, the aesthetic I like still works with blinds and Basil does not have a fascination with them. Mind you, I have learned to curb my enthusiasm about things as I never know what shenanigans Basil will get into next.

Another wonderful thing Basil discovered was snakes. Bear in mind this was when he was around six months to one year old, he was still gangly, uncoordinated; his prey drive was strong though and he was an alarmingly effective hunter. The first time he brought in a snake, it was longer than him and still alive. He let it go in the dining room where I was studying, I was also alone at home. Terrified of snakes, my body flooded with adrenalin, I was ice-cold, and my hands shook so hard I had difficulty using the phone. I sat on top of the dining table and phoned my husband at work.

Through my hysterical sobbing and yelling at Basil to get away from the snake my husband somehow managed to piece together what was going on. Hubby told me what to do and said he was on his way (40 minutes away). Gingerly, I climbed from the dining table, fetched a bucket and a broom. I found the courage to put the bucket over the snake effectively trapping it while jousting with Basil to keep him from his new playmate. I secured the bucket with a couple of thick, heavy textbooks and went outside for a cigarette to calm my nerves.

Husband arrives home and is quite flustered about the whole snake debacle, neither of us is the outdoorsy, naturist type. The rule in our house is if you have more than 4 legs, you’re going to be eliminated. We gathered a spade, a rake, and a machete then set off to deal with the snake. Hubby instructs me to pin the snake down with the rake as he lifted the bucket. That part of the operation was a success, then hubby started laughing; naturally, I was annoyed about that. Couldn’t we just complete Operation Snake Removal before he descends into psychosis?

Turns out it was a spotted bush snake that is prevalent in Africa and is non-venomous — well, it might give you a headache but that’s about it. Hubby disposed of the still alive snake with the dustpan and broom, tossed it over the wall into the neighbour’s yard. Of course, that was only the beginning. Basil brought 2 or 3 snakes in every week, at least they were always spotted bush snakes. I even forced myself to deal with them alone as I couldn’t very well expect my husband to rescue me every time.

Basil, studio shoot — photo by Nobby’s Photography

The months passed and Basil grew into a teenage cat, so did his personality and character. We learned to work around his sassy ways and stubbornness. He is still finding behaviours to plague us with, but we love him, so we take it in stride. Adapt and overcome is our new house motto.