Bolsonaro and the alligator, and my best friend in 2020
By: Tânia Braga Guimarães
Tags: Brazil, Bolsonaro, Empathy, Covid 19, Brasil

I was listening to the last video from Halu Gamashi, and in it, she said that our communication is terrible.

I keep complaining about the way we communicate, but I see few people doing the same. Then I thought: wow, she sees what I see !!!!

We are communicating badly on social networks. Difficult to distinguish people from zombies and robots …

But that was already happening, perhaps the networks only aggravate something that was already a trend.

For this reason, and for other reasons, this was the year I was silent. I said very little. I kept many opinions. I studied as if it were the last day. I made discoveries and one of them was that silence is my best friend.

Hear the voices in your head until you notice them decreasing, decreasing and making room for nothing.

Sometimes I find myself looking at something.

Someone stirring the sugar in the coffee cup at home. I stare at it. The person thinks it’s for her, but I’m just watching.

I look at the sky every day.

Morning. Evening. Night.

I feel the heat.

I am grateful for the rain that manages to descend and wet the earth.

I watch how many stars in the sky.

Then I see that it is possible from the window.

I hear the city much less noisily. Cleaner atmosphere.

Today, I left quickly. Searching for another religion book, one of my favorite themes, and I come back and find out that Nicette Bruno left. I was a little shaken. I locked myself in the room and realized that I wanted to cry. I really enjoyed it and cried.

As I learn in The body Explains Formation, that crying is a resource for oral people like me. So, I let the crying go. But nobody sees me crying.

You may read in some text of mine … But … ‘I will never let you see the way my broken heart is hurting in me…’

As a teenager, I was mesmerized by the figures of Nicette Bruno and Paulo Goulart, for their life dedicated to theater and for being always so smiling people. Model of a wedding that I once wished for myself, cheerful figurines as I imagine the fairies and elementals of nature. I was still mesmerized by their smile.

Cry. Slept. And I went back to silence.

2020 taught me that silence can be a great friend.

I keep thinking about this namaste trajectory that I chose. And how much behind the scenes of this is surveillance:

You can’t cry.

You can’t lower the vibration.

You can’t send anyone to pick up coconut. Put everything under the rug and maintain a sanctified aura.

Do not criticize the president or they will think that you are decompensated.

That you are full of entities.

Expands. Expands.

Inhumanity disguised as ready and beautiful phrases.

Good vibes only.

A modern version of Pharisees, who look a lot at shapes and little at heart.

Hypocrisies.

A surreal setting! From an inevitable pandemic to an avoidable president.

After the 20,000 deaths, I anesthetized myself. I tell myself it is a process.

I say it will pass, like other pests have passed.

I say it will get better.

An hour will really …

But my nerves feel the weight of seeing 180 thousand people leave.

I was thinking about our definitions of evil and good. When the attack on the twin towers occurred, with about 4000 dead, we were amazed at the then articulator. Bim Laden. How horrible!

Now we see Bolsonaro laughing at the victims and we think it’s normal. He’s just a little asshole. Or we are outraged. But it’s just another sentence. And we have to swallow this bitter thing dressed in madness.

In the meantime, I am not ashamed to say that there are times when I cry. (I cry with rage too). Because there are times when we take scares. What friends who say the whole family has become infected. There are times when people of our greatest admiration are in the middle.

Meanwhile insensitive people trivialize, disrespect and minimize the concerns and care of others.

Therefore, I prefer to cry to release the information. And be quiet.

So juice from Facebook.

Therefore, I only do the lives that put me with friends at moments that distract me and I retreat back to the cave.

Who did not understand that it is a year of recollection … Cleaning the internal so that it can manifest itself in the external, did not understand much.

I regret that an inevitable process has to be flanked by so much avoidable.

I have already ended friendships with insensitive and non-empathetic people. It looks like redundancy, but these things come with so many faces.

Let some more non-empathic ones go … Things in life.

Therefore, empathetic and loving voices have to speak more.

Bring your music to the balcony.

Bring your love and kindness.

Push the buttons of empathy.

I’m sorry

Forgive me

I love you

I’m grateful

In resilience we discover our true strength.

If the gentleman below doesn’t irritate the person.

Don’t destroy your namaste.

Perhaps this person is already an alligator.

I will never be at the table with the Pharisees and slanderers.

And YES I criticize.

Tânia

20/12/2020

PS for english readers:

Nicette Bruno and Paulo Goulart were theater and TV people.

Nicette died today because covid-19.

Bolsonaro is the President of Brazil (sorry for us).