How To Be An Excellent, Happy Reader
By: Sean Kernan
Tags: Life Lessons, Humor, Self, Sean Kernan, Life

How To Be An Excellent, Happy Reader

The process of reading doesn’t have to be miserable.

Pic via Cottonbro

I’m amazed by the number of people who hate reading, and yet still spend their free time reading. As a writer, I get a front-row seat to this phenomenon.

You could say, “The sky is blue.” They’ll chime in, “Actually, it isn’t blue. That is the light reflecting the ocean back at the sky. If you’d studied science you’d know that already.” And when you review that user's profile, all of their activity is just them arguing and disagreeing with everyone’s posts. It’s a deep, long, unhappy log of them clashing with the world.

But, alas, being miserable is an ancient and still-popular pastime.

To the rest of you, blue waters await. Reading can be so much more than it is right now.

Date a few authors (figuratively)

My girlfriend hated reading for the first 30 years of her life. It’s ironic because books are sorta her profession. She’s a professor of archaeology at a big university.

Her literary hatred was tied to her life path. She was, admittedly, that cliched student who hyperventilated before tests. She was a slave to her books from childhood through her Ph.D. program. I was sorta the opposite student. She says B’s are bad. I say B’s are badass.

It wasn’t until school that ended that she realized reading could be enjoyable. She still struggled initially because so many people pushed her to read fiction. She isn’t really a fiction reader. It took her a minute to figure that out. Today? Her house is full of biographies and history books (she loves Robert Caro). It makes sense.

Conversely, I love sitting around and reading fantasy books. I’m a 37-year-old man who can gobble up anything with magic and swords and dragons. I get lost in those worlds as if I was walking right through them. But, still, only a few authors can do it for me. It took some poking around.

If you want to learn to love reading, explore, and try out new authors and genres. It takes time. When you do try new authors, it’s urgently important that you dive in and practice total immersion. Kick open the doors to that cowboy saloon. Come strolling in and order a stiff drink like one of the regulars.

Tweak to your mindset

I used to hate flying with every morsel of my being. I dreaded the crowds. I hated standing behind irrational patrons as they berated employees for the weather. Any minor bumps during the flight had me praying to god.

The night before traveling, I was lamenting my coming flight to a girlfriend. She said, “Why not just enjoy it?” And iterated, to really embrace the process more. I was struck with the comment.

That day at the airport, I stopped leading with my anxiety and thought about the entire process as an optimist. I marveled at the logistical achievement of moving so many people through one location. I let myself feel still as travelers flowed around me. I indulged some of the best people-watching in the world. On the plane, I put on music and contemplated the feeling of being in the air. It’s amazing if you think about it. We are sitting on a chair, miles up in the sky, moving 900 km/hr and most of us are still complaining about every aspect of the process. Years ago, we’d have to travel for months in a shaky wagon to get where we wanted to go. We are spoiled little creatures.

The emotional energy you bring to any endeavor will define what you get out of it. If you go into an article, book or blog post with a chip on your shoulder, how can you possibly get any value out of that experience? Let your shoulders back. Get some coffee, relax, and indulge the author for once. Cynicism is the bedrock of discontent.

I often roleplay that I’m already a fan of the author before I start reading. It creates a sort of placebo effect on myself, enhancing the experience.

You don’t have to follow the tide

One reason people give up on reading? They were recommended a book by everyone or saw a book with glowing reviews. They read it only to be disappointed. They rationalize that if they don’t like the most popular stuff, they may as well quit.

Don’t. This is normal. For example, I’m a fantasy enthusiast. I read the Game of Thrones books long before the show came on. Well, I only read two of them, because I thought they were boring and dry compared to other fantasy novels.

Reading is so unbelievably preferential. You can hate 90% of authors of a genre, including the most popular ones, but still be an enthusiast because of the lucky few you find and binge read. Keep exploring.

You don’t have to be a natural reader

I was never a star student in english classes. I never had the essay that got paraded around in front of everyone. Reading and writing was a terrible endeavor: old, slow, plays, written with thick verbiage.

Most of us got jaded and did just enough to get by. We marched off into life thinking we weren’t good at any of it.

“Classic— a book which people praise and don’t read.”

― Mark Twain

Forget those days. Forget whatever grades you got. Your mind brings a unique code to any set of words. I’m endlessly fascinated by the comments I’ve gotten on my content over the years. They often reveal something I hadn’t even intended.

Delete your pickax

One of my biggest flaws as a reader is rooted in my competitive nature and my being a writer. The streams will cross. I’ll be reading a great piece of writing and then, like a jealous middle schooler, start looking for reasons to criticize the author's syntax. Usually, I’ll catch myself, come around and say, “This is actually awesome stuff.”

Remember, writing is a window into another person's mind. I try to walk those halls with curiosity, humility, and respect. It’s a lot like a museum, to be taken in, slowly and intellectually. Yet, some just walk in and say, “Psh. Just a bunch of old pots.”

Be the polite patron, the nice houseguest, who is eager to learn, and you will be rewarded.

Key Takeaway

Just as I learned to enjoy flying by indulging in the entire process, you should approach reading with an agreeable spirit. It doesn’t have to be this pedantic act of judgment. Reading is a luxury to be savored. Let your kindest emotions guide you.

With books and people, we often decide we don’t like them by the mere sight of them. Be deliberate as you pick up a book. Say to yourself, “I’m going to enjoy this.” That mere intention will invite a new wave of appreciation.

Above fall, empathy is a bridge to the most enjoyable reading experiences. Books have taught me that there are others out there like me, that there are incredible worlds to be walked, and that beneath the shadows, new ideas wait to be revealed.

See the words with a kind, inquisitive, open heart, and your mind will be enriched, and your dear writer will be quite grateful.