Bipolar Personality Disorder
By: Julia Vasconcellos
Tags: Mental Health Awareness, Mental Illness, Mental Health

BPD (bipolar personality disorder) is a mental illness which affects your way of living. It is mostly characterized by unstable moods, relationships, and behavior.

Here are nine traits of BPD:

Fear of abandonment Impulsivity/self-destructive behaviors Self-harm Explosive anger Paranoia Feelings of emptiness/worthlessness Extreme mood swings (splitting) Unclear self-image Unstable relationships

Fear of Abandonment

Many who struggle with BPD are often afraid of being left by others or left alone. This can trigger intense fear, which can cause the victim of BPD to do everything in their power to keep their s/o, or “favorite person”, around them. They may beg, cry, scream, argue, etc. However, this behavior tends to have the opposite effect, causing the other person to become overwhelmed and distance themselves or leave.

Impulsivity/Self-destructive Behaviors

BPD may cause people to engage in dangerous self-destructive impulsve behaviors. These risky behaviors are in an attempt to seek pleasure or sensation. They may include:

Binge eating

Overspending

Self-harm

Driving recklessly

Risky sexual activities

Substance abuse

This kind of behavior causes the person to feel good in the moment. However, it is short-lived, causing this impulsivity to become a cycle.

Self-harm

BPD causes many people to feel empty/numb, or worthless. It may also bring upon suicidal behaviors. Suicidal behavior includes:

Thoughts of suicide

Suicidal gestures

Attempting a suicide

Self-harm is usually done in an attempt to feel something or hurt yourself without actually attempting suicide, convincing yourself you deserve it. Different types of self-harm can include:

Burning yourself

Cutting yourself

Substance abuse

Binge eating/not eating

Pulling your hair

Explosive Anger

People with BPD usually struggle with short temper or intense anger. Once you are triggered, rage consumes you. People may yell, throw stuff, or completely black out from anger. The anger isn’t always directed towards others. Many may spend a lot of time being angry at themselves and it builds up. Minor inconveniences can cause explosive anger.

Paranoia

Paranoia is a common symptom of BPD. You may feel suspicious about others’ and their motives or intentions towards you. Under stress, many people dissociate and lose touch with reality. They may feel like they are in a dream and convince themselves that nothing is real, usually leading to extreme anxiety and even panic attacks.

Feelings of Emptiness/Worthlessness

People with BPD often feel empty, as if there is a void inside them. You may feel as if you’re “nothing” or “nobody.” To fill this “void”, you may engage in risky behaviors and become impulsive.

Extreme Mood Swings/Splitting

Splitting refers to mood swings in people with BPD. One moment, you may feel manic and euphoric, as if you are on top of the world and nothing can bring you down. The next moment, you may be drowning in your sorrows, feeling like it is the end of the world. Minor inconveniences may send you into a spiral, causing others to think you are overreacting. These episodes are fairly short.

Unclear Self-Image

Having BPD can cause your sense of self to be unstable. Some days you may feel great about yourself, but other days you may despise yourself, or view yourself as a horrible person who deserves nothing. Many people may feel as if they don’t know who they really are or what they really want. As a result, they may not have a steady job, friends, lovers, values, goals, or may even question their sexuality.

Unstable Relationships

BPD tends to cause relationships that are short-lived, yet intense. You may find someone new and quickly fall in love with them, or the idea of them. You may convince yourself that they can fill your “void.” Your lovers, friends, or family may feel like they have emotionally overwhelmed due to your rapid mood swings, impulsivity, anger, hate, etc. This may drive them away, leading you to feel disappointed and hopeless.

A Few Causes of BPD

Childhood trauma/PTSD

Environmental factors

Chemical imbalance in the brain

Genetics

It is important to remember that not all hope is lost for those struggling with BPD. Your circumstances do not define you. You are nothing less, and you are allowed to live your life as anyone else does. Remember to avoid the temptation to isolate yourself. Learn to manage your stress. Do not neglect your physical health. Don’t be afraid to seek help if you feel you need it. Most importantly, never forget that you are not alone in this fight.