When Staying The Same is No Longer an Option
By: Am Costanzo
Tags: Motivation, Growth, Self, Personal Development, Life

I am sick of myself.

I don’t know if it was the repetitive internal chatter about how I yet again failed to show up, or if it was the fact that in looking back over the last six months I can say, well there went a lot of time without much to show for it.

It’s a coin toss.

Whichever it was, here I am, utterly sick of myself. No longer can I sit and hem and haw, analyze and rationalize, and wish things were different. I’ve reached my limit. I’m officially fed-up. With myself.

You see, I like to write and I’d like to make something of it. Despite that, I don’t do it as often as I could. Why? I don’t know. I. Don’t. Know.

There is no one true and valid reason for me not writing. Yes, I can get up earlier and do it. I can also stay up later and do it. I can get over the guilt of allowing my children screen time for an hour if it means I get to write — something I feel selfish for wanting.

So here I am, disgusted over my inability to sit down and write.

Being Fed-Up Creates an Opportunity for Change

There comes a time when you have to make a choice and that choice can become the catalyst for change. You get to use that ball of fire — that fed-up energy — as a way to finally step into discomfort without all the baggage.

When you do that, typically what happens is your excuses no longer bear as much weight. It’s as if you’ve got Hulk power and you can now smash through any barrier with the flick of your pinky. The push-back isn’t as intense when you make a choice.

Deciding to take the plunge and commit to writing every day means I no longer have to listen to myself say ad nauseam, I should write something. I should write today. I should be writing right now!

When you find yourself so utterly sick of the status quo, here’s what you can start doing next that will get you moving in the right direction.

A 1-Inch Square to Start

What is it you’re struggling with? What have you been trying to accomplish that consistently eludes you? What can no longer stay the same for sanity’s sake? Is it losing weight? Changing jobs? Learning a new language? What’s constantly nagging at you?

I recently picked up Anne Lamott’s book Bird by Bird to jumpstart my writing efforts. On her writing desk, she has a framed picture of a 1-inch square. At first, it seems like a quirky writer thing but it turns out it’s the perfect tool to help stay grounded.

This 1-inch square represents all you’re responsible for in one writing session. That could mean it’s the first paragraph or it’s six shitty pages of nothing substantial. It could be one spectacular sentence. The point of this little square is it unarms your resistance (aka your excuses). It strips down your excuse-laden banter and leaves it with nothing to work with. A glacier your resistance has a lot to work with, but a 1-inch square leaves it looking around, confused, and bewildered. It can’t work with that, so it retreats.

This is how you make forward progress. Break your steps down into teen tiny pieces, disarm your resistance, and start working on your goals. You’ve taken your utter disgust for your inactivity and turned it into fuel for motivation while single-handedly dismantling your resistance by focusing on a teeny tiny 1-inch square of work that needs to be done.

You’ve taken that nagging feeling and used it to propel you toward making one small shift. One small change. A 1-inch square of work a day.

This is something I can get behind.