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Rage
By: Dave Larocque
Tags: Healing, Health, Emotional Intelligence, Blue Insights, Mental Health

And yet another helpless situation

Triggers intense rage from a reflection

I want to rage on you so you wake-up

Even if you tell me your day was tough

You left me hanging with broken promises

Another dysfunctional relationship this is

I chose to express with music in the shower

With mother nature’s water, I feel cleaner

I remind myself how well I have done

I dealt with my emotions, a proud son

I did not put it on the other

Somehow I know this isn’t over
Nina Sings, “I’m Feeling Good!”
By: Bybreen Samuels
Tags: Emotional Intelligence, Happiness, Wellness, Astrology, Astrologer

TODAY’S HOROSCOPE — DECEMBER 5th 2020

Four out of the five personal planets are dancing in the heat of a grand fire trine. Chiron also joins the party because of the glow the Moon left as it keeps separating. Your mood and tone for the day comes straight from Nina Simone’s, “I’m feeling good.” Bask in whatever this means for you because your inner circuit board is harmonised.

Venus, the last of the personal planets is definitely not a casual bystander or wallflower. It’s part of a T-Square, headed by the Moon which is challenged by Uranus. As the Moon is the pivotal planet, you still have the ability to maintain a sunny disposition.

Uranus may provoke you to suddenly seek out unusual forms of emotional excitement. And Venus could lead you to be indiscriminate in who you give affection to. They both have the potential to disturb your relationships or natural style of relating.

This strain can be avoided if you use the Sagittarian Sun to be more philosophical, than literal. It will maintain the healthy energy flow to the Moon in Leo. Conversely, if you allow the Moon to lead the way, you’ll bring drama to your doorstep.
Finding Hope: A Teenager’s guide
By: Diary Entry
Tags: Depression, Self Improvement, Hope, Self Help

Us boys and girls go through many obstacles in our teenage years. Whether our problems are family, relationship, or even friendship related, the Struggles that we face affect our mental health. We start questioning our choices and decisions. We never want to give up, but once we hit rock bottom we lose all signs of hope.

Some people have it worse than others, but somehow they’re stronger than the ones with minor issues. It can make others lose hope, because they start thinking about how things seem different for them compared to their peers. But what if I told you that I have the antidote to your problem. Do you have the courage to try and go through this journey with me?

My solution to your major or minor problem is something you’ve known and had all along. It is hope. Yes, the thing you’ve gained and lost multiple times. No matter how hard life gets, you need to have hope. It is the one thing that can help you, but without it you’ll be lost.

I know for a fact that you’re not fully on board. Stop questioning me, yourself, or this text. Even though you have lost hope more than once, that doesn’t mean you can’t gain hope ever again. Everyone is going through something; it might be an internal or external problem. If they all gave up when things got hard, then wouldn’t there be fewer of us?

We are all stronger than we think we are, but you know what makes us stronger? Getting through our obstacles. It doesn’t matter how or when you get over the bump in your road, what matters is the fact that you got there.

Hope is not easy to hold onto, and it’s harder to make something out of your life without it. Hope is beautiful, and is essentially your magic potion. So instead of beating yourself up, how about you start thinking about all the great things you’ve done in life. Even if it’s a small thing, such as getting an A on your test. That is still something you should be proud of. Once you do, I want you to surround yourself with optimism, even if everything seems very dark. You can simply just sit outside and admire nature.

If you did so, I’m proud of you. You took the first step. Now let’s move onto the second one. Start looking for good coping mechanisms; it can be writing, reading, dancing, meditating, or listening to songs. The list is so long I can go on for hours.

If you’ve reached this point, then trust me you have so much strength and courage, but also… hope. You want to get better, and you’re starting to. Unfortunately, now I have to let you go and let you create your own journey.Good luck!
The Importance of Patience
By: Tomás Antunes
Tags: Life, Personal Development, Self Help

Patience is a virtue and and it can improve your life in many ways. If you want to be successful you need to be patient.

Patience is defined as the the quality of being patient, being able to bear provocation, annoyance, misfortune, delays or pain without complaint, loss of temper, irritation or the like.

The world is crazy sometimes and we need to distance ourselves from the fast-paced stress of everyday life.

Consistent hard work and persistence will bring you results and positive outcomes but if you expect overnight success you’ll be frustrated and disappointed. You’ll have to face obstacles and setbacks without giving up to be able to progress.

Being patient with important people in your life will show that you are caring and supportive. The most precious gift is time and attention.

Patience helps us make better decisions and deal with our emotions. Sometimes it requires discipline and self-control. We shouldn’t act on impulsive behaviors.

If you can provide quality service regularly you’ll have better results at work and people will see that you are reliable.

When you feel a sense of urgency, just take a step back and you’ll see it’s usually not that important and there’s no need to get upset about it. Remind yourself to slow down, there’s a time and place for everything.

Take more breaks and try to find some distractions to fill your time and do the things you like. Practicing meditation can greatly improve your patience.

Sometimes we need to accept the things we can’t change. Why would you be worried when there’s nothing you can do about it.

Quality takes time and that’s why it’s worth it to wait and make long-term plans. Use a calendar or a schedule to manage your time and focus on your goals. You can break down a challenge into multiple milestones, measure your performance and plan for the next few months, 1 year or 5 years.

Once there were two companies who competed with each other on selling the same product. The first company to go to market would have an advantage so they rushed out a product. The second company did some extensive research, they got feedback from users before launching and came up with a much better product. Patience is the key to success.
A Personal Approach to Making Life Better
By: Andrew Rocha
Tags: Growth Mindset, Selfhelp, Life, Success, Personal Development

Photo by Mona Eendra on Unsplash

Absorb what is useful. Discard what is not. Add what is uniquely your own. — Bruce Lee

There are a lot of synonyms people use to describe making their life better.

Personal development.

Personal improvement.

Personal growth.

They all claim to be personal, although it doesn’t always feel that way.

Most books in this industry offer a methodology, backed by science or testimonials, to help someone achieve their desired outcome.

While thousands of people may resonate with any given approach, it does not have to work for you. We all have unique personalities, live in different environments, and are at distinct stages of life.

One person could follow the same methodology as someone else and get different results.

We could try the same suggestion that we made twenty years ago and get

different results today.

Yet these methodologies aren’t useless, either. We can treat these as recipes rather than binary prescriptions and question each ingredient.

Does this resonate?

Will this be helpful in my situation?

Learning different recipes allows us to cobble together different ingredients and make our own unique recipe.

Most problems have multiple solutions; experiment with different options to discover what works best.
How to get rid of any bad habit
By: Intishar Alam Misbahul
Tags: Life, Education, Life Lessons, Self Improvement, Self Help

Most of us, if not all of us, have a bad habit that we want to get rid of. Even though some of us take the initiative, we seldom succeed. But does that mean it is impossible? Should we just give up? If so, I wouldn’t have written this in the first place!

“Habits are malleable throughout your entire life.” — Charles Duhigg

After reading the book, The Power Of Habit by Charles Duhigg, I could not but help myself to write this. Throughout the rest of this story, I will guide you on how to break, change or build any habits you ever wished for!

As habits take weeks, months or even years to form, it would be a wishful thinking that you can just remove one from your life in an instant. Zap! And its gone. No! no! no! no! That is not how it works!

So how can you get rid of it?

A habit can be said to have 3 different parts or phases:

The Power Of Habit by Charles Duhigg

Habits are autonomous. When your brain gets a cue, like a programmed computer, it will follow a routine and get a reward.

Let us scrutinise the habit of brushing one’s teeth. We start brushing our teeth when it is dirty(Cue). We put some toothpaste on our toothbrush and brush it(Routine) until it is clean, shiny and gives that cool tingly sensation(Reward).

The Power Of Habit by Charles Duhigg

Now that you know how habits work, how do you change it?

It starts by identifying the cue. I once had a bad habit of wasting time on the internet and I will be using that as an example. I started of tracking when and why I wasted time, lets say, watching cat videos instead of actually finishing my homework. It usually happened when I felt bored and was not motivated to do anything. That’s my cue. Watching cat videos was my routine, and the happiness from seeing their cuteness was my reward to get over boredom.

How did I tackle this problem?

By forcing myself to not watch and do my work was what I initially did. It was gruesome. My boredom just made everything a living hell. Until I finally read further into the book(The Power Of Habit) and realised it was a devastating mistake(just exaggerating). What the book suggested was to replace the routine with another more productive routine.

Bad habits do not vanish overnight with sheer willpower alone. So now what?

I remembered I love reading. I find it pleasurable. So I decided, why not read books instead. My dad gifted me a kindle last year and instead of letting dust collect over it, why not make use of it?

And that is how I got a new reading habit and removed my old one. I got the same reward from the same cue, just a different routine.

I warn you though, it takes time. Occasionally you will find yourself doing the same again. To truly remove a habit, “You have to actually believe in your capacity to change for habits to permanently change.” as Duhigg said. With a bit of patience and effort, you are all set!

So in conclusion, identify your habit cue, routine and reward. Replace the routine with another one that gives the same reward.
How to Stop Being Lazy
By: Judy J Lutz
Tags: Productivity, Self Improvement, Mindset Coaching, Advice, Self Help

How to Stop Being Lazy

Photo by Adrian Swancar on Unsplash

Just as a general introduction, I’d first like to invite you to stop criticizing yourself. Right? It’s been a rough year, you’re allowed to be lazy. Most of us are still processing 2020 and here it is almost over. Yikes! What the heck happened?

Aside from that, I know you have a strong desire to be more productive because you know there’s a great idea hiding out in your subconscious, still waiting to be manifested.

It’s how we evolve. Human beings innately want to improve themselves and their current situation, so despite the lure of your favorite hanging spot, (mine’s the kitchen table in front of my computer), I’d like to drop five ideas that may help you initiate positive action.

#1 Clear Your Head

Grab a journal and start writing. That’s right, allow all of those constantly running thoughts to spill out on the paper until there’s nothing left, a total brain dump. The purpose of this exercise is not to create a list of “to-dos,” but to get the unsolicited narrative out of your head, making room for new ideas.

#2 Master Your Emotions

Set aside the feelings that accompany those thoughts. Create a judgment-free zone where you can observe without blame. Removing the emotional charge minimizes the drama, which is exactly what’s been preventing you from moving forward.

#3 Remember it’s OK

If you’ve fallen off the horse, cut yourself some slack. You’re going to be just fine, there’s nothing that needs your immediate attention or you would have done it already. This is not a crisis, it’s just time to regroup, and that won’t happen unless you allow yourself to relax. You're burned out and you’re still trying to hang on. Let it go, all of it, and declare yourself some time to officially rest. Take a nap!

#4 Separate Brain from No-Brainer

Some tasks are so simple you can do them on auto-pilot, like laundry and bill paying. Go ahead and get the no-brainers done, you’ll feel more accomplished with minimal effort. It will help to clear some of the clutter.

#5 Ask the Question

Ask yourself, “What’s the next best step?” Questions instantly hijack the brain. Your subconscious is compelled to pull up the information quickly from its massive storage base of data. Try going to sleep with the question, you’ll almost always wake up with the answer you’ve been looking for.

“Progress isn’t made by early risers. It’s made by lazy men trying to find easier ways to do something.” 🙂— Robert Heinlein

Use these five quick hacks to master your mindset and get yourself moving forward again.

Accept where you are, you’ll make it through whatever this is, you always do.

Namaste
The Social Animal
By: Edward Cullinane
Tags: Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, Self Help, Writing

"The happiness and unhappiness of the rational, social animal depends not on what he feels but on what he does; just as his virtue and vice consist not in feeling but in doing." — Marcus Aurelius

I am a keen writer, I have been for some time, and yet never seem to do it. I never want to do it, no matter how much I enjoy it, but then the same can be said for much of my life; I love to live and expect great things of myself, but struggle to motivate myself to do so — only to then feel worse for it.

This, I suspect, is not an uncommon trait among my generation; a wave of people adrift. Lacking purpose in a world flooded by it.

Covid especially brought on the doldrums. I want to be the sporadic, exciting person I aspire to be. Someone who acts, achieves and is sought after; not the person I feel I have become; a slave to a computer, and tired barman who is far less physically fit Han he’d like to admit.

Yet this quote for today I feel summarises my predicament.

We are but animals, no different to my dogs. We live, and that alone is the source of my discomfort. Instead of living, I have become one of the dead. I do little, and thus feel of little purpose.

In writing here, I begin the solution.
5 Practical Steps to a More Prosperous Life
By: The Franc Blanc
Tags: Life, Quotes, Self Help, Advice, Mindfulness

Image by Mohamed Nohassi on Unsplash

Do you want to live a more prosperous life? A more fruitful one? More fulfilling? A more flawless life?

Of course, the answer is going to be yes. It doesn’t matter if we are a doctor, a soldier, a billionaire, a struggling student, or a prisoner; the answer will always be yes. And why wouldn’t it be? Everything we had ever done, are doing, and will going to do in future is for this same reason.

But an important question here is how? Is there a blueprint to live a prosperous life?

This question is even more relevant in today’s age because of the increasing complexity of our society. Everyone has now got so many identities that they don’t even know how to juggle those, and it’s not a problem of unsuccessful people. Even successful people don’t know how to manage these. For example, we all know about Steve Jobs. A brilliant businessman, a visionary, and whatnot, but things were never so golden in his personal life. You might have also known someone personally who is a fantastic person but whose life is a complete mess.

These seemingly different problems have a common root, and that is the inability to handle multiple social identities. And this is not the only explanation. You can go on till infinity about why even after all these modern-day technology and comforts, things are not as it should be.

So, we need something, an algorithm or philosophy, which shows us a way to live a more prosperous life in between all these messes.

Fortunately or unfortunately, we are not going to be the last person to ask this question, nor are we the first.
We Need to Say This More …
By: Shemena Johnson
Tags: Relationships, Self Improvement, Vulnerability, Love, Self Help

This year has not been normal. Many people have been separated from families, worried about patients and colleagues and have lost loved ones.

One evening I was finishing up a lengthy call with a close friend on the East Coast. The call lasted for three hours. We ended the call with, “I love you” and then “Talk later.” I realized after the call that saying “I love you” doesn’t have to come with a hug or a kiss, but before that feeling of being alone or when you miss someone. It’s just a reminder to let that person know how much you care.

Saying “I love you” is one of the most important things that you can say to another person. It signifies how much the person means to you. It lets your loved one know how much you appreciate them. Think about it … when is the last time that you said “I love you” to the people that mean the most to you?

Life is hectic. Love and affection need not be relegated to just a thought in people’s minds. Saying “I love you” is not always easy because it brings up feelings of uncomfortability or awkwardness — likely because of the fear of embarrassment or rejection. Technology has also made us less communicative — at least face-to-face. But, saying these three little words is one of the most important things that you can say to another person. Here are the reasons why.

You Shouldn’t Assume That They Already Know

You might be fairly certain that your family members know that you love them. However, everyone worries from time to time about whether or not they are loved. It is natural to want reassurance — even if you already know the person loves you. Phrases that include appreciation and support are always important.

It’s Good For You

Saying “I love you” to someone is not only good for the person that hears these words, but it is good for the person saying them too. Showing love or appreciation for another person can make you feel genuinely happy. It can give you a sort of inner peace.

It Helps Mend Relationships

Every relationship has its ups and downs. There are bound to be conflicts and arguments. Saying “I love you” can help mend relationships. It lets the person know that you are thankful to have them in your life even if you don’t always agree.

You Might Not Get the Chance to Say It

People are not around forever. Tomorrow is never promised. You could wake up one day and lose the one person most important to you. If that happened, you might regret that you didn’t get the chance to say “I love you” one last time.

It’s Part of a Healthy Relationship

Saying “I love you” means being vulnerable. There is always a chance of rejection or scorn. Being vulnerable is important in any close relationship. When you are vulnerable around a person, you are allowing them to get to know the real you. It lets you open your heart to give and take fully.
Stop Saying You Want Someone’s Life
By: Lana Tiara Aviana
Tags: Affirmations, Self Help

To emphasize on the matter more, let’s repeat the title.

Stop saying you want someone else’s life.

“If only I have Elon Musk’s life.” No, you want his success.

“Aww, I wish I will have a partner like yours!” No, you want their caring and loving trait.

“I’d die to live the life she lives.” No, you want the freebies she gets to have for being an influencer.

Almost everyone dreams of the life of other people, but it’s not the actual life they envy, they envy for the life that seemed. By saying you want other people’s life, you’re asking the universe not just for their successes, but the hardships too. Yet, people handle struggles and glories differently. What works for them may not work for you. What strengthens them may break you. What fits them may be isn’t made for you. The trials they faced might be too great of a burden for you. And vice versa.

We are our own different person, each individual unique and handle things with our own personal minds. We have our own special experiences and memories that shape us. Some likes to be taken care of, some likes to be independent. Some love being in the crowds, some love being in solitude. Some likes to settle down, some wants to explore. By wishing to have other people’s life, you’re unconsciously manifest some traits that may not for you.

So, do start saying you want the qualities instead.

“I wish to have a partner as loving as my dad to my mom!”

“I’d be in heaven to have Jeff Bezos’ money!”

“Think it’d be lovely to be as generous as she is.”

Believe me, words matter. They unconsciously shape you and the world around you. Niche it down, say the qualities. Let the universe hear what it needs to hear.
7 Solid Reasons to Shave Off Your Thinning Hair
By: Tim Ebl
Tags: Lifestyle, Life Lessons, This Happened To Me, Life Hacking, Self Help

7 Solid Reasons to Shave Off Your Thinning Hair

Photo / Zurijeta / Shutterstock

Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson. Jason Statham. Sir Patrick Stewart. Vin Diesel. Bruce Willis. Samuel L. Jackson. Terry Crews.

Lord Voldemort.

What do all of these men have in common? They shaved their heads and went out into the world with bravery. They took hair loss and owned it like the bosses they are.

Hacking off your hair can be a life hack that puts you in a new league.

Up to 40% of men aged 35 or over suffer from hair loss. If you are losing your hair and aren’t willing to go to extreme lengths to save it by spending a ton of money on surgery or drugs, maybe you should throw in the towel and cut it off. I did.
5 Subtle Signs That You Might Be Unproductive
By: Nick Wong
Tags: Productivity, Self Improvement, Self-awareness, Self Help, Psychology

5 Subtle Signs That You Might Be Unproductive

Most of us know what being productive looks like but it’s equally important to recognize the subtle signs that we might be falling behind. Nick Wong Follow Dec 22, 2020 · 4 min read

Image by Isaac Smith from Unsplash

Have you ever felt that you could’ve done so much more?

You had plans for the day but ended up spending the entire afternoon scrolling your social media feed, discovering how others are having the time of their lives while you’re rotting away on your couch.

The next thing you know, you start to question your life and why you are being such a lazy bum for not being productive.

Since you’re feeling down, you distract yourself with even more social media and the cycle continues until you start to do something about it.

If left unattended, this will become an issue because you’ll be wasting your most precious asset — your time — on activities that are not your priority.

Here are 5 subtle signs that you might not be as productive as you want yourself to be.
50 Questions to Break the Ice at Any Gathering
By: Tim Ebl
Tags: Happiness, This Happened To Me, Life Hacking, Self Help, Introvert

There’s nothing worse than sitting there with blank looks on your faces, wondering what to talk about. There might be a lull in the conversation that just won’t end. Then there’s the group that can’t seem to get comfortable with each other for some reason that day.

Arrgg. So awkward and painful.

It’s natural to have these moments, but it’s good to have a way to break that ice and get things moving again. That’s where these questions can rescue you and give everyone a chance to talk freely.

Having a virtual get-together and need some conversation starters? Here are some questions to give out to your family and friends to keep that conversation flowing. My favorite is number 50.
How To Face Abrupt Outcomes of Life Peacefully & Make the Right Choices.
By: Shivangi Patel
Tags: Life, Life Lessons, Personal Growth, Advice, Self Help

How To Face Abrupt Outcomes of Life Peacefully & Make the Right Choices.

I always believed if we are born on this beautiful blue planet then it is definitely not to feel all those negative emotions that involve stress and worries.

I mean being serious is necessary in a man-made working world but it is not necessary to act on life so seriously that we forget to access the Peace within.

This life can be stressful, but it is our responsibility to try to keep our insides at peace while facing the chaos outside.

Follow the path of least Resistance.

You might have heard, “grass is greener where you water”.

Similarly, Any situation you face will only be determined by how much you water it, and sometimes, some outcomes do not require any water.

What you need to remind yourself is that you can decide how much power you give to any situation.

It is a skill to adapt your thoughts in a way where no matter what happens in your life, you can choose to see the bright side, or choose to follow the path of least resistance that will give you your power back to you, so you can keep your peace of mind.

Resisting always kept me away from peace within, what I learned by fighting the world is that you can never win if you resist in any way. Letting go of resistance is the ultimatum for those who suffer in facing life scenarios.

Whether it is work or relationships, you cannot control the outsides and your reaction won’t always make things better.

What you can learn is to identify when to stop hurting yourself by putting a stop to the feelings of resistance and choosing to accept reality so that you can go with the flow of your life.

For professional life, you can steer your ship in the direction of least resistance and thus you will know which way is yours to take.

For relationships, you can flow in a way that invites peace to your heart and the heart of others, resistance will only drain you.
65 ways to dodge boredom this winter
By: Aliza R
Tags: Education, Self, Health, Books, Self Help

Since there’s no place to go — let it snow, let it snow, let it snow. It’s ever a song were written for winter 2020, it’s that one. A lot has been said about what we’ve lost in 2020, but having no place to go has meant creative attempts to dodge total boredom. I’ve benefitted from friends, acquaintances and even stray dog walkers who’ve recommended things to keep me occupied. This list is an attempt to return the favour.

TV shows I’ve enjoyed

1. Self-Made (Netflix)

2. The Boys (Amazon)

3. Unorthodox (Netflix)

4. 5 bedrooms (BBC)

5. Strike (BBC)

6. Bodyguard (BBC)

7. Contact (Channel 4)

8. Good Omens (Amazon)

9. The Catch (Amazon)

10. The Ambassador (Amazon)

Documentaries

1. Daughters of Destiny (Netflix)

2. Dogs (Netflix)

3. The Social Dilemma (Netflix)

4. Fyre (Netflix)

5. The Boys’: The Sherman Brothers Story (Disney+)

Classic Films

1. Casablanca

2. My Man Godfrey

3. His Girl Friday

4. The Fugitive

5. Independence Day

6. West Side Story

7. Mulan (The 1998 version)

8. Overboard

9. Miracle on 34th Street (The 1947 version)

10. 84 Charing Cross Road

Fiction books

1. Bel Canto, Ann Patchett

2. The Plague, Albert Camus

3. Orphan X, Gregg Hurwitz

4. Big Little Lies, Liane Moriarty

5. Where the Crawdads Sing, Delia Owens

Audiobooks

1. Talking to Strangers, Malcolm Gladwell

2. Becoming, Michelle Obama

3. The Inimitable Jeeves, P.G. Wodehouse

4. The Ride of a Lifetime, Bob Iger

5. Sherlock Holmes, Stephen Fry

Non-fiction

1. Indistractable, Nir Eyal

2. Educated, Tara Westover

3. Loonshots, Safi Bahcall

4. The Spy and the Traitor, Ben Macintyre

5. Fashionopolis, Dana Thomas

6. Never Split the Difference, Chris Voss

7. Range, David Epstein

8. Rebel Ideas, Matthew Syed

9. What Money Can’t Buy, Michael Sandel

10. Invisible Women, Caroline Criado Perez

Online Courses

1. Behavioural Economics with Rory Sutherland (42Courses)

2. Think Like Sherlock (42Courses)

3. Blue Ocean Strategy (Quantic)

4. Ancient Philosophy: Plato and his predecessors (Coursera)

5. Mountains 101 (Coursera)

6. Chinese for Beginners (Coursera)

7. Big History: Connecting Knowledge (Coursera)

8. Blockchain and Business: Applications and Implications (Coursera)

9. The Science of Well-being (Coursera)

10. Ecology: Ecosystem Dynamics and Conservation (Coursera)

Podcasts

1. The Missing Crypto-queen, Jamie Bartlett

2. Revisionist History, Malcolm Gladwell

3. The Happiness Lab, Laurie Santos

4. Americast, BBC

5. The Rise of the Iron Men, Misha Glenny

Newsletters

1. James Clear

2. Nir and Far

3. Connor Swenson

4. Farnam Street

5. theSkimm
Four Daily Habits That Will Change Your Life
By: Blake Wallace
Tags: Habits, New Years Resolutions, New Years Reflections, Inspiration, Self Help

Image Credit:

Nikolay Osmachko

It is almost the New Year and maybe you want to get a little head start on your traditions. There is no better time to start than right now! As Coronavirus keeps everyone locked down, there really isn’t the age-old “go to the gym” tradition that people can safely make. However, there are a few other habits that you can get into starting today that will help your life tremendously over the next year.

You don’t have to do these every single day, but they should become a part of your personality. You should always try and do these and focus on making them a habit. Once they become a routine for you, then slacking off one day a week will not hurt you, it may even help you stay on track!

1. Drink tea every morning

There is plenty of evidence that tea can actually help you and your body become much more effective at every daily task. This includes your awareness levels but also your ability to burn off energy throughout the day! Start in the morning with some tea and you will notice a difference. It is much healthier than your coffee by any means.

2. Get a consistent sleep schedule

Sleeping is one of the healthiest things we can do for our body. Whenever we sleep, our body is able to repair itself and it prepares us for the next day. From the increased mental ability to maybe living longer, there are endless benefits to sleeping a full eight hours a night. There are also tips that go along with this habit, like turning off electronics before bed so your quality of sleep improves, to not eating a large amount of food within two hours of going to sleep as well to improve the quality.

3. Take a walk

You do not have to run 5 miles every day to get fit and be happy with your body. A slight adjustment to your regular routines will be plenty for helping you shed off that extra weight you’ve been meaning to. A walk is a perfect addition to your habits that will both improve your physical fitness and your mental health. I’ve been trying to go for walks every day around sunset for around 20 minutes or so, which leads to being about a mile in total. It does not have to be far, but walking around and taking in your surroundings does a lot towards keeping any negative thoughts out. It might even help you get that better sleep!

4. Read something

Lastly, read something, preferably, a book. You do not have to read a 600-page novel every weekend, but you should aim to read a little bit of something every day. For me, this normally takes the form of audiobooks, but it can be through Audible, paperback, Ebook, or even some new information you find online. The point of this habit is to get into the mindset of learning new information.
Sorry about the delay.
By: Anthony Onyeador
Tags: Blog, Friends, Therapy, Self Help, Writing

Sorry about the delay. Been settling too many unfinished timelines and plans. Will follow you fully soonest.

At least I have begun from one of your favourite secrets: How you became Liza Express.

Keep at it!
If Nothing is Working Out For You, Just Do One Thing
By: The Franc Blanc
Tags: Life, Self Improvement, Advice, Inspiration, Self Help

How can we overcome this situation?

The only thing we can do in such a situation is just to do what needs to be done. Nothing more, nothing less. Do one thing that you know you should do, then do the next thing, and so on. That’s it. That’s the solution.

Sounds like something idealistic, aggressively optimistic, and useless thing to say? In that case, I just want to ask what else can we do? We are in the middle of an ocean with no compass. What else can we do other than rowing?

But the rationale behind this solution is not that we are doing this because there is nothing else we can do. Quite the contrary. We are doing this because that’s exactly what needs to be done. Most of the time, we get so obsessed with controlling the cause and the effect that we forget our limitations. Let’s remind ourselves again that we are nothing more than our past experiences. We think that if something is not done before, it is either impossible or highly unlikely, and this thinking limits our options. We think that there is only some finite number of ways to go from A to B based on our experiences and ignore every other way which we haven’t encounter before.

Another problem is that sometimes we manipulate ourselves into thinking that we are doing something meaningful, but in fact, we are just wasting time. This has become a kind of coping mechanism for procrastination. We know that we should be doing something, but we don’t feel like doing it. In such cases, we choose a middle path, we start doing something less important but not meaningless. In this way, we trick ourselves in thinking that we are doing something productive.

So, by doing something which needs to be done, and something which truly needs to be done, rather than a placeholder task, we are effectively creating a little order from the chaos around us. If we kept doing this for some time, things around us will get a lot clearer and we might be able to find new ways to move towards our goals. This is not over-optimism, this is what always happens. No solution can be found by staying in one place. That’s why it is always better to at least do something, and if that something is something which you know you should do, then there is nothing better than that.
Things I wouldn’t say to my EX
By: Niki Pikachu
Tags: Breakups, Love, Self Help, Relationships

Photo by Anthony Tran on Unsplash

We broke up since a year ago. He was an important part of my life as well as my best friend. For the first 2 months, I cried a river over him, there were tons of flashbacks — our trips abroad, me being fed in his kitchen, our hands-holding in bed before we sleep and many more. I couldn’t understand how painful a breakup could be, given he is my first proper relationship. I was devastated.

3 months after the breakup, I gradually regained my conscious. I packed up all souvenirs and little gifts into a card-box which i deliberately hid away in my bedroom. I knew that if I ever see these again, I would not be able to hold my tears and eventually resulting in a breakdown. Many people know me that I never like to get rid of things — maybe it’s a habit to change. Over the years, my luggages have become heavier and heavier, which is constantly reminding me of who I am and of my past.

During the fourth and fifth months, I started to reflect on what’s went wrong in our relationship. We’ve had ups and downs like many other couples, but the main reason for our split-up is commitment. How can one be sure that their partner is the right one? And it is for this particular reason I let go of him — an opportunity to explore the right fit for him even though I was deeply in love with him.

I wouldn’t tell him that last year was a true struggle for me and I had my tears all over the pillow;

I wouldn’t tell him how much I wanted him back because I refused to become his hesitation when it comes to happiness;

I wouldn’t tell him that I’ve kept all our memories in a little box that will never get thrown away even though he is no longer with me;

I wouldn’t tell him that I’ve stalked him via social medias just to check if everything is okay, checked his latest updates many times a week because i still care him as a friend;

I wouldn’t tell him that I’ve taken his past criticism of me by heart and consequently lost confidence for some time but now I feel stronger.

Thank you my ex for the relationship lessons. I believe time will heal my wound and until one day when I meet the right one at the right time. I genuinely wish you happiness in your life even though those words remain deeply in my heart.
3 sest self- help websites
By: John Acosta
Tags: Motivation, Self Development, Self Help

there’s a lot of self-improvement tools that are available online. A am talking about self-development websites, where you can find useful articles/resources. They are for free, so use them

I will share 3 most inspiring links.

My favourite websites are:

www.greatist.com

www.mindbodygreen.com

www.alexmonaco.net

Don’t forget learn something new every day!
Show Up In Your Life Every Day
By: Andrew Rocha
Tags: Selfhelp, Life, Giving Back, Happiness, Personal Development

Photo by Luca on Unsplash

Life becomes easier and more beautiful when we can see the good in other people. ― Roy T. Bennett

Despite the tension for all political parties in the 2020 United States presidential election, one message was unanimous: go vote. The encouragement to participate is strong during voting season but fades away after elections are over. Whether we participate in our local city board, or volunteer for nonprofits, there is always an opportunity to participate and speak up. This applies to elections, and to other areas of life as well.

Call and show appreciation for friends and family, even when it’s not their birthday.

Show your partner how much you love them, even when it’s not Valentine’s Day.

Donate food or volunteer in a soup kitchen, even when it’s not the holiday season.

We don’t have to wait for the big milestones to celebrate. Every day is a gift. Every day is an opportunity to share kindness and compassion.

Give someone a gift when they aren’t expecting it.

Show someone love when they need it, not when they are looking for it.

Give a stranger a compliment or a kind greeting, without expecting one in return.

These gestures will mean more when they are unexpected and genuine. A small act of kindness can go a long way. Show up for people every day, not just on special occasions.
How to Have Success in 2021
By: Michael Obrien
Tags: 2021 Success, Pause Breathe Reflect, Self Improvement, 2021, Self Help

Exhale…

You did it. It hasn’t been easy; you’ve burned some calories. You’ve felt it all, and along the way, you may have discovered that you have more patience, resilience, and capacity than you ever realized.

You, my friend, are awesome-sauce.

So if you can, take a moment to Pause, Breathe, and Reflect on…

the magic within you

what you discovered

how do you wish you use your dash

Each Sunday, I dropped into your inbox and you into my backyard to share a perspective, inspire, motivate, and squeeze some juice to help you get through what we need to get through. I hope I’ve given you the support you’ve needed during these unprecedented times.

I’m going to take the next two weeks to pause, breathe, and reflect as well, but I have one last video for you. This one is all about your dash.

So…Exhale…

It’s time to reflect, reset, and renew because we need to harness all the energy we can to create a better tomorrow next year.

Thanks again for being on this ride with me. Thank you for subscribing and sharing our messages with your peloton, and most of all, thank you for being a resilient bad-ass.

We got through this because you got through this.

So see ya 2020, bring on 2021!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

Congratulations on successfully storming the castle this year!

Michael

Visit our new Pause.Breathe.Reflect Store by clicking PBR.

p.s., Mark your 2021 calendar for a few special events.

January 13th: Pause Breathe Reflect Dinner

January 29th: Career Kickstart Summit
Asking the right questions, are we?
By: Siddharth Shah
Tags: Life Lessons, Introspection, Mindspace, Questions Worth Asking, Self Help

The goal of living seems to be — to have a good life — and the paradox is one has to define what that means to begin with. Maybe you figure it out as you go along or maybe you lean on what other people think it means. In life then it means different things over time. But if the definition changes over time, then does the experience change too? Perhaps, but how is it different from settling for something — where you simply change the answer based on your convenience, even complacency?

There are two modes of questioning in my experience, two doors if you will: one that leads to reaffirming your beliefs and the other that aims to challenge them. It’s easy to see where the former takes you, plus there’s no dearth of opinions even when they are half-formed. Questions where the answers are anticipated aren’t what you are looking for, as are those looking to reaffirm your creeping doubts.

Instead focus on the latter, uneasy set of questions that’ll make you shift in your seat, squirm with discomfort as they need to be asked but you don’t know how to answer them. Maybe not now, but in time? There are again plenty of ways to scratch that itch so it’s important to steer clear of reaffirmation. Once you’re in that space it’s important to remain there.

Asking the challenging questions may keep you worried for a while, but overcoming that, there is only to gain from the exercise. The discomfort will force you to confront the parts of your life you’ve been too shy to tackle, too afraid, even. There will be no reward in sight and you’d be left constantly trying to get to the other side. There is something to be said of our dependence on reward but that’s for another time. All you’re thinking of is bypassing all these unnecessary trials and getting to the solution.

So how do I get there, you ask? Ah but is that really the question? Consider the situation where you need to learn a new skill but aren’t able to yet. You check videos and blogs online only to find people who’ve accomplished your goal and you’re yet to start. Maybe you acquire the required courage indirectly by observing others but does that really change anything for you? I’d suggest that the only thing affecting real change are your actions. So how does it really matter how you get there?
I’m a Good Bitch: Exploring My People-Pleasing in a D/s Dynamic
By: Sex, Self
Tags: Kink, Healing, Dominant Submissive, Sexuality, Self Help

When my misster calls me a “good bitch,” it does something to me.

Something super healthy and well-adjusted? I’m not sure. But it does something.

This isn’t to judge anyone in a D/s (Dominant/submissive) dynamic, because you get off how you get off. But for me, I know striving to be “good” is something I’ve struggled with all my life, mostly in non-sexual situations.

Being good, self-sacrificing, putting others’ needs and desires before my own is something I started doing as a child. It’s caused me a lot of grief in adulthood, including interpersonal heartache, anxiety and depression, and an eating disorder. This is why I doubt the healthiness of my reaction to praise.

And yet perhaps the idea of personal growth doesn’t have to mean abstinence of something problematic but rather appropriate indulgence of it. In other words, my healing might not come from intentionally being not good but rather being oh-so-good in the right circumstances.

When I follow her orders and she calls me a “good bitch,” I feel happy. I feel sexy. I feel seen. And when I feel those things, I’m actually less inclined to be good. I’m actually more likely to become a brat in that situation which is where I’d still be submissive but with an attitude and a spicy rebellious side. In that space, I’m more of an outspoken advocate for myself which actually does feel healthy.

So maybe being a sexual submissive is where I can get fulfillment from being a “good bitch” so that I can be whoever the fuck I want to be everywhere else in my life. Maybe if I fill this urge in a dynamic that clearly identifies that role, it won’t show up where it’s not welcomed.

More to come.

xo
How To Deal With Feelings of Depression
By: Rachel Lee White
Tags: Vibrant Living, Depression, Sadness, Self Love, Self Help

How To Deal With Feelings of Depression

Happiness

Photo by Heather Ford on Unsplash

List several things that helped you keep going in the past when you felt depressed.

Example: Shower as soon as I get up;

take meds earlier so I am not ‘hungover’ in the morning, etc. ‣

Write all the thoughts or affirmations you can think of to help you cope with depression.

Example: I will feel better after I have been awake for a while.

Or, I am stronger than my depression. ‣

Write as many actions as you can think of that help you change your focus when feeling depressed.

Example: Sit outside in the sunshine.

Take the dog outside to play

Listen to upbeat, happy music

Visit a flower shop

Photo by David Clode on Unsplash

Happiness & Vibrancy with Rachel

www.rachelleewhite.com
ATTENTION
Tags: Book, Attention, Success, Buch, Self Help

ATTENTION

What doesn’t Catch your attention, puts you at tension — DrCSBuch,md

Unless you pay attention to the positives, keep away from negative indulgence, you cannot achieve success. Attention on someone, something, somewhere else will never let students get topmost success in the class. Current e-working helps us pay attention to whatever interests us, be it anywhere in the world. If you know how to focus your attention to the information, knowledge and wisdom of others on the internet, can collect and curate it for your purpose or you also learn how to draw attention of the world to your thoughts, action, work, projects, business or charities, you need to learn to browse the net, the best way. Digital attention and attention seeking both were not available to the previous generations but they increase our reach and also riches! We are in charge of our attention and we can increase and automate our skillsets and can use both pull or push technology to get what we want from the world wide web almost instantaneously and also consistently. If we use computers as our slaves and not our Masters, we have a genie which acts on our orders and gives what we want on our platter irrespective of the subject matter! I always tell my patients that attention and not at tension cure hypertension. You get to learn from everything only if you pay attention to it.

Change of attention from Ego to e-Go with the work of creating success will bring a welcome change of better outcome from lesser inputs and faster and farthest results which is the need in the journey for Creative Successful Behaviour.

https://www.facebook.com/drcsbuch/
Yes, Your “Social Battery” is Important
By: Alex Barakat
Tags: Social, Social Battery, Recharge, Self Help

Hello i'm here giving you a teen perspective on life because usually we get ignored