How to Create Your Story to Live A Truly Authentic Life
By: Christopher D. Connors
Tags: Life Lessons, Personal Development, Self, Self Improvement, Happiness

How to Create Your Story to Live A Truly Authentic Life

Begin by knowing yourself and embracing all of your story.

Photo by Alvaro Reyes on Unsplash

Every one of us has a story. What’s yours? Better yet — do you really know how to share it and tell it in such a way that liberates you, while simultaneously resonating with the community around you? That’s where the good are at. That’s when you know you’re comfortable enough in your own skin to take a big step forward, and embrace your true self.

I’m not here to teach marketing or personal branding 101. I’m here to ask you to think deeper on who you really are. To think more about your “story” and why it matters. To ask you to dive into it and begin incorporating it into your conversations, business relationships — and that constant inner dialogue you have.

With yourself.

You have a story. It’s real. Whether you think it’s unique or just plain boring, it doesn’t matter. Your story is what will connect you to other people and make a huge difference in building your character, as well as boosting your self-confidence. It provides you the ability to be yourself in this world. It gives you the ability to be authentic, which opens up all kinds of opportunities and relationships for you.

New York Times bestselling author, Mike Bayer, writes in Best Self:

“People are living lives that are incongruent with their authentic selves either because they’re following in their family’s footsteps instead of carving their own path, or they’re doing what worked for them ten years ago but simply doesn’t anymore, they’ve closed themselves off to what life has to offer because of fear or any number of other reasons.”

Authenticity is about presence. It’s about living in the moment and leaving the past behind. You’ll find as you continue moving in the direction of a life of fulfillment, this is really all that matters.

You see, the business relationships you carve out will be derived from your authenticity — the qualities that make you, you.

The family — your birth family and those people in your life that, let’s face it, are family, will be attracted to you for your true self. Not some cheap imitation or knock-off of who you think you need to be. They probably already know their story. But they want you to live it, to embrace it and to tell it for what it is.

The person that you choose to invite into your life — for love, romance, forever — will not be worth your time if they’re chasing you for perceived material value. Rather, they’ll be worth a lifetime of commitment if they’re willing to put you before themselves. And if that you that they choose to put before themselves is your true self. The one that lives with joy, fire, zeal and imagination.

Being Yourself

When I hear people talk about “Being Yourself” I come back to this main point: In order to you know your true self, you need to know your story. I acknowledge, we’re always writing the story of our life. So focus on the present.

But know that it really helps to know your past, in so many ways. Start with where you’ve been. Focus every day on the grind for the present. And let that light the way to your future.

Here are some things to think about for your story:

Know what lights the fire inside of you (what you love and inspires passion)

Know what you don’t like (which is just as important!)

Understand what has failed and WHY

Recognize what has worked, and WHY

Embrace what comes naturally to you

Analyze what you struggle with

All of this points you toward what your emotions tell you in each situation. Your emotions guide you, and help you to make sense of your life.

Once you begin to better understand your emotions, you will gain a greater acceptance of your self. You’ll find yourself listening with greater intent to your intuition- that powerful, eternal voice inside of you that always seems to know what’s right for you.

Your intuition is always willing to guide you and be your life’s compass, leading you to grander and bolder frontiers of limitless possibility. Your intuition is letting you know who you really are. That’s authenticity.

Concluding Thoughts

Dr. Ryan Smerek writes in Psychology Today:

“We can readily recall experiences when we were acting inauthentically — in a way that felt at odds with deeper values of who we believe ourselves to be (see Lenton, Bruder, Slabu, & Sedikides, 2013). We can also recall instances of being our “authentic self,” when we shared openly our opinions and perspectives and felt validated in doing so.”

The truth is, in life, we usually know when we’re behaving in alignment with our true selves. That means acting in accordance with our values.

We know what we need to do. We just have to do it.

We know who we really are. We have to follow what our intuition and heart are saying.

So, who are you?

I think you already know. Embrace yourself. You should know what this feels like by now. It’s indescribable. It’s otherworldly. You just need to live it. And from those experiences, you can create your story and share it with the world.

We’re waiting to hear all about it.

R3AL is an exciting new publication featuring authentic, inspirational stories that nourish the soul from two of Medium’s top writers, Christopher D. Connors and Jordan Gross. Subscribe and check out what’s R3AL!

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