The Zen Kid: Helping Your Kids Meditate
By: Wendy Miller
Tags: Mindfulness, Meditation, Parenting, Children, Family

Meditation has multitude of benefits, but when we talk about those benefits, it’s always in the context of adulthood. We want to reduce stress (from a job or relationship), lower blood pressure (something only an adult would think about), or focus on ourselves for a few minutes (kids are great at focusing on themselves).

But kids can benefit from meditation too. They can suffer from stress or anxiety just like an adult. They can struggle to fall asleep. They can have trouble setting boundaries or need some time alone to find balance.

The problem is that many kids also don’t want to sit down and meditate. It sounds boring and no fun. Why would they want to sit down, close their eyes, and listen to their own breathing? There are video games to be played, cartoons to watch, friends to play with, and a dozen other things that are way more fun and interesting sounding than meditation!

The key is to make it sound more fun and interesting to kids. And I have a few ideas on just how you can do that.

Don’t make it a chore

The first step to getting a kid to want to meditate is not making it a chore. Don’t order them to do it or punish them if they don’t.

Present it as something you think they’d enjoy and make clear that it’s optional. Encourage them to join you in your own meditation practice. If they get up and leave mid-session, let them.

No one wants to do something they feel forced to do. By making sure your kid feels no pressure, you give them the space to decide on their own to try meditating.

Keep it short

For adults, once we discover the benefits and start enjoying meditation, we come to believe the longer the session, the better. But for kids, the opposite is true — at least, in the beginning.

Start with short sessions. No more than five minutes until or unless your child asks for more. With shorter sessions, your child is getting the benefits, and the experience, but they don’t have time to get bored.

For particularly active kids, such as ones with ADHD, you can start even shorter. Begin with just one minute.

Photo by Veri Ivanova on Unsplash

Set timers

Despite the shortness of the sessions, it can feel like forever to a kid who wants to be doing other things. Set timers for each session, so that your kiddo can close their eyes and relax into the moment, rather than worrying about whether time’s up yet.

If you’ve got a kiddo that will still try to crack an eye open and see how much time is left, try using an app that will give interval bells as well. This way, they’ll hear a bell every minute or so and be less tempted to try to peek at the timer.

Look for meditations designed for kids

Most meditation apps have meditations that are specifically for kids and you can even find entire apps dedicated to kids (such as Moshi). These meditations are fun, engaging, and offer cool themes like space travel, being on safari, etc.

This helps grab the kid’s attention and makes them much more eager to meditate. It uses their imagination the way they already try to use it themselves which makes it a lot easier for them to get into the meditation.

And let’s be honest: we might love that peaceful stroll on the beach or in the forest when we meditate but the kids would definitely prefer the visual of being shot into space from a cannon.

Try it when they’re bored anyway

Maybe your kid lies in bed at bedtime, staring at the ceiling while waiting to fall asleep and bored out of their mind. Or the two minutes they spend brushing their teeth feels like forever. If they’re already bored, meditation might seem like a way to liven things up.

Use an app to let them fill these boring moments with meditation. Since they can’t do anything else anyway, they might be much less resistant to giving it a try. And once they try it, they might be eager to do it even when they’re not bored.

Photo by S&B Vonlanthen on Unsplash

Don’t ask a bunch of questions

When I teach an adult meditation, or lead a class, I often ask how they feel before we begin and again after we finish. I ask if they have any feedback, did they enjoy the meditation and a few other questions. This not only helps me ensure that I’m offering what my students need but helps them be able to assess themselves to see and feel the benefits of meditating.

But kids might not always be able to express themselves. And feeling like they’re being quizzed might frustrate them. If your kid is reluctant to meditate but gives it a try, try restricting yourself to a simple, “How was that?” Don’t push for a lot of details. Let them have some time to think and reflect on their own.

Make it a game

If your kid is into it but needs a little push, try making meditation into a little game. Have them try to “beat their best.” They might try to meditate a little longer each day or see how many days in a row they can meditate. Or maybe their goal is to try as many different meditations as they can without repeating the same one twice or repeating a theme.

Don’t have them compete with anyone else. This sets them up to fall into the comparison trap and when it comes to meditation, there should be no comparisons. It should always be about the individual.

Above all else, don’t push. If your kid truly seems totally against the idea, just let them know the door is always open for you to help them learn to meditate and let it go. They’ll benefit more from that than anything else.

Wendy Miller is a Single Mom Coach & meditation teacher. After years of settling for abusive and otherwise toxic relationships, she began using meditation and other tools, to heal herself, set boundaries, and only engage in relationships (romantic and otherwise) that bring her joy. She wants to help other single parents find the love & happiness they seek, including and going beyond romantic love. She lives in Florida with her two sons, where she homeschools while solo parenting, while surrounded by what feels like a zooful of animals.

You can follow her on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and Pinterest. You can also sign up for her newsletter for exclusive tips and goodies.

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