What Is Self-Empowerment?
By: Wendy Miller
Tags: Empowerment, Empowering Women, Self, Personal Growth, Self Empowerment

Self-empowerment is something I came to embrace a bit late in the game. For a long time, I was content to just kind of float along and see what happened, not setting any goals or taking any real control of my own life. I just kind of figured it was all up to Fate or Destiny, out of my hands and therefore not something I could really do anything about.

While I still believe there is a certain element of Fate or Destiny in our lives, I did finally learn that self-empowerment mattered. That taking control of my own life, taking responsibility for my actions and choices and for where I was (or wasn’t) in my life, was something I needed to do.

But even then, I didn’t fully understand what I was embracing. I thought self-empowerment just meant standing up for myself. Not letting people push me around or make decisions for me.

But it is so much more than that. It’s setting goals and making decisions (good ones!), yes. But it’s also believing in yourself, knowing what your strengths and weaknesses are and being able to take control to live your life in a way that allows you to use your strengths and bolster your weaknesses with the help of others.

And self-empowerment is part of every aspect of your life. Let’s look at the ways you can empower yourself in all areas of your life.

Finances

Do you have savings, a retirement fund, investment accounts? Or do you live paycheck to paycheck and sometimes struggle to pay all your bills?

Financial self-empowerment looks like eliminating your debt, having enough money to support your lifestyle (you might also think of this as living below your means), and being prepared for emergencies, unexpected disasters, and the future (retirement, college funds for kids, etc.).

Of course, you can’t make these changes overnight. But if you want to empower yourself financially, you’ll start by looking at your financial situation and making a plan to start making those changes.

Physical body

The physical body is an area where many, if not all, people really struggle with self-empowerment. Lots of people struggle with liking their body’s appearance. And lots of people struggle with feeling good in their body because of physical health concerns.

But empowerment in your physical body means learning to like your body’s appearance. This doesn’t necessarily mean you embrace being overweight. It might mean you decide to start eating better and working out more because you want to be thinner so you can like your body.

It also means taking control of how your body feels. If you’re sick, or have a physical health concern, self-empowerment means scheduling and attending doctor’s appointments, filling prescriptions and taking medications, and making other changes that can help your body feel better.

Emotional & mental body

The emotions and mind are not a “body,” but we do have feelings in those areas. And self-empowerment is just as important in them as anywhere else.

Self-empowerment in these areas means awareness of your stress and managing that stress to reduce or eliminate it before it gets out of hand. It’s recognizing your feelings and controlling those feelings so that you don’t splash negative feelings all over other people or let negative feelings linger longer than they need to.

It’s seeing a therapist and/or taking medications for mental health conditions. It’s engaging in activities like mindfulness, meditation, and getting enough sleep to ensure that your mental and emotional health are supported.

Photo by Amir Taheri on Unsplash

Sexuality

Sex, like the physical body, is another area where many people — mostly women — struggle. Women are given such conflicting messages about sex — and if we’re not given conflicting messages, we’re given very clear messages that are negative. Men sometimes struggle with this as well but usually in a different way.

Sexual self-empowerment means enjoying your own sexuality. Being able to embrace who you love and how you love them, becoming familiar with your own body and what you enjoy sexually, and taking care of your sexual health with appropriate medical exams, contraception and protection.

It’s also letting go of ideas others gave you about sex that don’t resonate with you. This might mean letting go of ideas like having sex on a first date or with a stranger is wrong, that polyamory is wrong, or that a healthy relationship involves having sex a certain amount of times per week/month/year. Examine the beliefs you hold and decide which ones you truly believe and which ones you hold because someone else told you it was true.

Career

Do you love your career? Why or why not? What can you do to love it or love it more? Is there a different career you’d rather pursue?

Many people mistakenly believe that when it comes to work, their options are limited. They believe that because they have a degree in a certain field, they’re stuck with it. Or that it’s too late to go back to school. Or that they can’t start their own business because it’s too risky with a family to feed.

Your career and the path it takes is firmly in your own hands. Self-empowerment means knowing that you can change careers, regardless of your degree, or go back to school, or start your own business, or make any other change you desire at any time.

Spirituality

Spirituality is a very personal thing and yet it can be so heavily influenced by those outside of ourselves. Our parents, extended family, and the community around us can all influence what we think we believe.

Self-empowerment in spirituality means examining those things you believe and deciding if it’s what you truly believe or if you’re merely following a path others laid out for you. Maybe your family is Christian but you’re not so sure God exists — or you believe there’s a higher power but it’s more neutral in nature.

Maybe you explore oracle cards, intuition, pagan religions, or no religion at all. Maybe if you were raised with an “alternative” spiritual lifestyle, self-empowerment looks like exploring more traditional religious paths.

In the end, no matter which part of your life you’re looking at, self-empowerment comes down to one thing: you. It comes down to you being in charge. You deciding for yourself what you think, what you believe, and what you feel. You deciding what changes to make to get the thoughts, beliefs, and feelings you want to have. You standing up for yourself when someone else tries to pressure you into saying, thinking, feeling, or doing something that goes against what you want for yourself.

Self-empowerment is ultimately about you creating the life you want, living it the way you want, and not letting what others think change that.

Wendy Miller is a Single Mom Coach & meditation teacher. She helps moms use mindfulness and meditation to create the life they really want. She lives in Florida with her two sons, where she homeschools while solo parenting, while surrounded by what feels like a zooful of animals.

You can follow her on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and Pinterest. You can also sign up for her newsletter where she offers more insights, tips, tricks, advice, and information to help single moms find purpose, creativity, passion, and peace.

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