From Berlin with Love: Like a Prayer
By: Martyna Poważa
Tags: Religion, Childhood, Fashion, Memories

Since traveling is now mostly forbidden, in order to trip at least a bit I have no other choice than to indulge in my childhood memories. I could also indulge in some forbidden substances, but I’m a good gal and you should be too, so even if you do that don’t tell me, I don’t want to know!

Very recently, very unexpectedly I’ve somehow stumbled upon a recollection of one of my first fashion icons. I’ve found it not on Pinterest nor Tumblr; it wasn’t an actress nor a musician seen on MTV in my friend's house (yes, back then you could see some music videos on MTV. Who would have thought?). Analysis of some of my fashion fascinations really came as a surprise when this memory hit me, but now everything makes perfect sense.

As a child of pretty religious parents, I’ve had to attend church regularly. During every mass my mind and eyes were wandering around — I was thinking about the geography test on Monday, I was developing short-term crushes on altar boys, I was planning outfits for the upcoming week.

Surprisingly, here, in the temple of God, I’ve found my first fashion inspiration, but not by looking at women who were attending the mass. No, that would be too trivial, that wouldn’t be at all exciting. They were wearing the same clothes everyone had and I wanted something else, something fresh. I was looking directly at the mother of Jesus, the Virgin Mary.

In every church we were attending to I had a favorite place, always near to the picture or the statue of the Mother of God. There are many representations of the Blessed Virgin, always very stylish, but there are three that heavily influenced my personal fashion choices.

The first one is from the icon from the church next to my first house. She was hidden at the back of the main nave, but for me, she was at the center of my private runway. Painted in a classical icon style, she wasn’t so pretty, but her clothes were making up for her gloomy face. She had a huge golden crown and heavy black cape, entirely covered in shining gems. I was five at the time and I could stare at her for ages, the glitter was just out of this world. In front of the painting, there was a small faldstool where I was kneeling during the mass and sometimes after. What could have been mistaken for a huge flame of faith was just admiration of a really beautiful outfit of the day. I do it today as well, sometimes sinking into a never-ending stream of pictures on Pinterest.

The second entry in my album of Most Memorable Outfits of the Most Pure is my reminiscence from a small maritime city I and my parents visited during holidays. We couldn’t miss the mass, so we simply checked the church there and it turned out that they had a very specific interpretation of the Holy Virgin. It was a small sculpture, pretty similar to the icon from the previous paragraph. It didn’t amaze me; I was pretty disappointed, especially since the city was quite famous for its representation of the Mother of God. It wasn’t until the end of the mass when I understood what is so special about her. An image behind the altar slowly went up, revealing a hidden painting; one of the most beautiful I’ve ever seen. Mary was smiling mysteriously, rainbow-like rays around her head, and Jesus calmly laying in her arms. She had a white hood and orange-y red-ish maxi dress which contrasted with the blue of the cloud she was sitting on. Even though the sculpture should be the main event, for me the orange dress from the painting was everything. I was very sad when we had to leave the city without attending the next mass.

Third, and last Mary is from the church of the district my parents still live in. I’ve spent there most of my life and even when my faith started declining I still had to go there every Sunday. When I stopped contemplating the words of God I really had loads of time to contemplate other things so there I was — next to my favorite statue of Mary, admiring her clothes for the entire 60 minutes. You could say that this statue was kinda basic — just Mary in a long white dress and long white cape, loose hair hidden modestly under the hood — but I was really loving this minimalist interpretation with some Olsen twins vibes. She looked like these Greek goddesses that I was reading about in school, and even though she wasn’t a literal goddess I really wanted that for her. I also really wanted that hooded cape, just to have it in my closet, I wouldn’t have to actually wear it anywhere, I just wanted to look at it and imagine that I’m an elf. Cate Blanchet has clearly seen the same statue because there is no way that Galadriel's outfit was so similar by coincidence.

After some time I dumped the church as I could no longer pretend that I believe, but my fascination with outfits of Mary hasn’t stopped, buried in my subconscious. I obtained black embroidered kimono from Zara’s sale, which resembles the bejeweled cape; I also acquired an orange maxi boho dress from H&M’s sale. At the time these purchases seemed a bit irrational, cause usually I’m a t-shirt and jeans kind of person, but the urge was so strong I couldn’t resist. Now I’m on a perpetual hunt for a white maxi dress, and at least I know why.