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danthareja

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cognitive-distortion

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My husband left almost 3 years ago and lives with his affair partner. Before he left, he exhibited signs of depression, mood swings, and his behavior became erratic. He’s now living a completely new life in another state but yet has not filed for divorce. For the first two years, he would communicate sometimes but would not respond to legal issues. I kept busy living my life and didn’t contact him unless it was about legal matters, but I was always kind and treated him with respect. Last year I was diagnosed with advanced stage cancer and have not heard from him since. He’s even changed his contact information. I’m really struggling with understanding how I was a huge part of his life for almost two decades and even though we are still married, his actions show that he truly does not care about me. I can understand “falling out of love,” but how does someone just stop caring? My self-esteem has plummeted and it’s excruciating to feel like someone I knew for so long and shared so much of my life with doesn’t care if I live or die. I have worked hard to understand that his actions are not my fault, but I am having such a hard time accepting how he could learn that I have cancer and intentionally make my life more difficult by disappearing without getting divorced, and how he could just erase me from his life as if I never existed. I don’t want what’s left of my life to be spent dealing with this painful issue and I try not to think about him too much but I feel like our unfinished marriage is hanging over my head.

I’m really struggling with understanding how I was a huge part of his life for almost two decades and even though we are still married, his actions show that he truly does not care about me.

8Mind Reading

Me and my girlfriend have been dating for 5 months. She has been part of a Baptist chruch for 5 years now. But she is also bisexual which is a sin. Also another problem with her is her past and how insecure she is. Before she meet me she been with a few girls and they cheated on her so she basically shut down and locked herself from everyone else. Basically she is using religion to help her move forward in life and recover and become a better person. But people don’t realize that religion isn’t what fixes you it’s the people on the chruch with you. She feels like she owes her whole heart to Jesus because she believes that Jesus has been her savior. But along it has been people in the church. Because of the religion she is saying she is waiting until marriage for sex. But I believe she is using it to cover up herself because she so insecure about herself. Like trust me she I would say why but I only got400 words. Deep down inside she wants to do these things but she scared that if I see her naked or something that I will run away. We’re both overweight alot but nothing over 300 pounds. I don’t know how to handle this cause we both love each other and I’m willing to wait.

But I believe she is using it to cover up herself because she so insecure about herself.

8Mind Reading

I seriously dislike my stepdaughter. She is now 13 and is the youngest of 4 kids, but from a different father. My wife described the circumstances of her birth as an accident, as she didn’t even have a relationship with the girl’s father. She did consider abortion at the time, but followed through with the pregnancy. The girl has always had everything handed to her, and my wife seems to feel guilty, although she tells me, and I see, her trying to educate the girl. The girl is impossible! She is selfish and is incapable of thinking about someone other than herself. Even when she is nice, she is unbearable. I try to participate in her life as much as I can; to try to find activities we can do to get closer, but it seems she doesn’t like me either. There is nothing about her that I like. My wife also seems annoyed by her. She is a good student, though, and has friends. Teachers speak well of her too. She is lazy and believes she is so smart. She is smart, but she just thinks so highly of herself. As much as I try to understand the situation, consider the girl’s past, and to try participate and help my wife, and cannot like this girl. I do believe she is old enough to take responsibility of what she does wrong and to do her part in helping us become a family. I am afraid I will not make it, regardless of how much I love my wife. I do realize that my attitude lately does reflect the fact that I dislike the girl, and I try to not make it as conspicuous for my wife; but it can be pretty obvious, especially when my wife is also annoyed by the girl. My wife works a lot, and the girl spends a lot of time by herself, as she has always have. I’ve suggested that we find activities, but the girl doesn’t want to do anything other than being on her phone and ask for new stuff, which she ends up breaking anyway. She has no regard for other people’s space or things; everything is disposable to her. I feel like I won’t make for another 4-5 years… Please help!

The girl is impossible! She is selfish and is incapable of thinking about someone other than herself. I do believe she is old enough to take responsibility of what she does wrong and to do her part in helping us become a family.

10Labeling

Is lifetime depression a thing? Is there some other medical explanation? I’ve had my thyroid tested which has once turned out to be ‘hypo’ I believe. But only when I fasted. I just feel like I’ve never been happy. Bullied at a young age. Very smart. Reasonably good looking. Flaky, constantly loosing things, messy, can’t get my stuff together. Heavy under achiever. I’m not lazy I try and work hard. I’m trying to quit drinking. Been a functional alcoholic for probably 10 years or more. I’ve stepped it down to a couple beers a day over the last week. I just don’t know if I will ever get myself together and be happy. I always try and be happy and kind to other people. I pick terrible relationships because I tend to see the best in people. I’m always somewhat anxious. My mind never stops it’s relentless. I try to stay optimistic. But really, I have had very few moments in my life where I’m actually happy. My mother’s agoraphobic. I don’t want to end up like her. And I don’t want to live on pills for the rest of my life that make me feel not like me. I’m just so tired of being miserable, and anxious, and scatterbrained. Do people really go a day where they can compartmentalize what’s going on in their brain long enough to be happy? Without drowning themselves in a bottle of tequila (which doesn’t really work either). This is a problem I’ve had since childhood. Is it always this much of a struggle for everyone. Just to do the dishes!!! Like why can’t I function? It can’t be easy for anyone. But it can’t be this bloody hard for everyone. What’s wrong with me?? (From Canada)

I just feel like I’ve never been happy.

7Overgeneralization

From a young man in India: Hi. I am married from last 4 years. Before my marriage I was in very deep relationship with another girl. We have tried to get married but because of the caste issues we couldn’t get married. At that time only I have taken decision to get married in other relation as her family was not at all ready to do this thing.

2No Distortion

Ever since I can remember, starting from when my mom and dad got divorced, I was ill treated by my relatives on my mother’s side. I am not sure why it was but perhaps because I maintained good relations with my father despite the divorce. My father was never around since I can remember and I can recall being bullied by harsh words and being mocked at in front of my mother but she would never say anything. Sometimes they would say really nasty things about my dad in front of me and mock me for talking to him, other times they would call me anorexic although I was average fit for my age at the time. I didn’t know even the meaning of anorexia at that time, I must have been 10. Once during my exams, I remember having a huge argument with my mom over how her relatives treat me that way and how she doesn’t stand up for me. I must have been around 14 that time. But my mom always told me to be patient and that family is family. Once I told my Dad and he went in to a fit of rage and threatened my mother that he would take me and since then I got scared to share with my Dad so I only had my sister to really lean on to. But she was a different personality and would always be very silent. It’s been years since then and every year we experienced in our lives not one has gone by where we have not been criticized by them despite our mom having raised us all by herself. They neither helped us but it seemed were only there to criticize us. As I grew up I felt no sense of belonging and wanted to be away from them. My mother still tolerates whatever they do because she loves them despite the things they do. But when they treat her badly I have to hear it like a part of my life even if I no longer live with my mom. I am afraid if this continues I might lose needing my mom in my life ever which I feel guilty about. (From Malaysia)

They neither helped us but it seemed were only there to criticize us.

7Overgeneralization

This is causing issues w/ 2 family members both w/ diagnosed disorders. My mother is diagnosed with anxiety and is on meds for years, though it doesn’t seem to be severe (her panic attacks are rare, and she socializes quite well). She is currently living with my dad and adult brother, who have both complained in the past how she’d move/take things without informing, so we would spend time looking for things that we’d later find out were just with her. I remember her telling me she took my old cellphone “just in case” – but that was my work phone and I kept it for a reason.

2No Distortion

I suppose the issue I am having now, directly relates to issues from my childhood; so I’ll start there. My parents separated when I was pretty young, so I grew up in a single parent household. Which, surprisingly, is not the problem. My mother has OCD (along with other emotional problems). We were never allowed to be sad, or mad, or anything else that wasn’t happy. She would literally get angry with us. “What’s wrong with you?” she would say in a disgusted tone. She yelled a lot.

We were never allowed to be sad, or mad, or anything else that wasn’t happy.

7Overgeneralization

I’m 18 with no job and my girlfriend wants me to live with her which I do want to live with her but want to wait until I have a job so I’ll have enough money to pay rent but she expects me to move in and start paying rent immediately even though If I did this It would completely drain my bank account. My parents want me to move in with them because they don’t really like my girlfriend and say terrible things about her and to her. Another issue is Both, my parents and girlfriend seem to think that they’re more important than what I want to accomplish in my life and expect me to do everything they want. My girlfriend will usually cry and say I don’t love her if I say anything about what I want to do in my future because she doesn’t want me to leave and go to college away from where she is (it doesn’t necessarily require college but the job I want includes lots of travel). And my parents don’t want me to go to college for what I want or try to accomplish my goals because they do not believe it is a good career path because its not really a career field that makes you a lot of money. I feel very depressed and worthless. I also just feel like my girlfriend and parents are both not happy and very angry because of me. I’m also feeling overwhelmed because I am looking for a job but while I’m doing this everyone including my girlfriend’s dad keeps yelling at me telling me to do it faster. I am also busy trying to follow my dreams and create art, music, and comedy. (age 18, from US)

Another issue is Both, my parents and girlfriend seem to think that they’re more important than what I want to accomplish in my life and expect me to do everything they want.

8Mind Reading

I am in a relationship with a 49 yoa male who has not had a lasting relationship in 19 years. He is a realist, recovering alcohol of 25 yrs, does not believe in Western Medicine and speaks the truth about everything regardless of feelings. We have had challenges from day one but the most recent challenge is that he has enacted stipulations that we will not attend public events together, we will not eat at restaurants together, we will not attend a movie together, etc – all because he believes I am unable to control my behavior/emotions. For example, we attended an event in which I ran into a male who had caused a serious injury to myself in which I almost lost a leg. I have not seen this male since the final court date.The male dragged out things out for years causing me more money and frustration to collect on his criminal restitution. Yes, I was surprised to see him at the event, told my bf who the male was and expressed disgust of seeing him again. I did not approach the male or speak to him. The whole incident/my behavior last possibly 5 mins before I collected myself and went back to having a good time. Since that event, my bf believes I have anger issues and can not be trusted to “stay in the moment” with him therefore he will not attend any more events with me because he “will not put himself” in that situation again. Nothing I did or said should have affected my bf therefore I am confused to say the least. He explained it as why should he feel uncomfortable or give support to me for something I should have dealt with already. He does not want to go to the movies because I once mentioned I was uncomfortable in the seats however we have since gone to two movies with the new seating and I have been fine. He knows that but for some reason has decided all of sudden to issue this stipulation. I believe this is controlling manipulative behavior, possibly passive aggressive and punishment for things I may have done or said that he will not forgive me for. I do not believe this is normal but he has me almost convinced I am at fault for these stipulations. Please help me understand what is going on. (From the USA)

I do not believe this is normal but he has me almost convinced I am at fault for these stipulations.

5Personalization

I’ve been having problems lately controlling my patience and emotions over whether or not someone replies to my text messages/emails. All started a few months ago I was catching up with a friend over text. As she had recent success with relationships, while I have been struggling with interpersonal relationships in recent times, I reached out to ask her opinion over what positive qualities she saw in me, as I’ve done with my close friends and family to combat my self-esteem problems, because she has been one of the better friends I’ve met in recent times. No response. Another instance of this happening was when I wished a friend I used to have a crush on happy birthday, I thought it would be a chance to ask her how things were going, as we had not talked in awhile. Again, no response. Sometimes when I post to an online forum but don’t get replies, I feel like I am a big annoyance and bother. After some of these occurrences I have had more frequent intrusive thought attacks, with my anxiety screaming things like: “You’re insane!” “You are an intrusive burden for asking people these questions!” “You’re handling this all wrong!” “You should have known better than to continue those conversations!” As with talking to friends of the opposite gender: “You are a dangerous disgusting disgrace, and you have no business with women!”

Sometimes when I post to an online forum but don’t get replies, I feel like I am a big annoyance and bother. After some of these occurrences I have had more frequent intrusive thought attacks, with my anxiety screaming things like: “You’re insane!” “You are an intrusive burden for asking people these questions!” “You’re handling this all wrong!” “You should have known better than to continue those conversations!” As with talking to friends of the opposite gender: “You are a dangerous disgusting disgrace, and you have no business with women!”

10Labeling

My son came home from Colorado and has been drinking and smoking pot for about a year. When he came home he was a little paranoid but ok. He went to see some friends and partied for 3 days, he said he only drank. When he came home he was hearing voices and uncontrollable we took him to a hosp. and they admitted him and gave him some medication. He went into outpatient therapy, but that was not helping with his problems he needed one on one. We went to a social worker and she said he wanted to hurt himself so she called cops and had him admitted. He was there for 10 days because he did not want to take meds. He’s in outpatient again and the doctor has him on 1mg at night and 10mg Abilify. I cut the abilify to 5mg because when he was on 10mg he heard more voices and holding his head all the time and not functioning. The doctor still thinks he should be on 5mg in morning and 5mg towards evening. We tried that and the next day he was so bad we thought we were going to bring him to the hosp. again. I called the office and they said the dr. Knows what he is doing and I should listen to them. When I did not give him the extra Abilify yesterday he seemed much calmer and wanted to do something. I am not sure what to do next I have been looking for other doctors but either they don’t take our insurance or they don’t have any openings for a few months. Is it possible someone age 30 can be ok and 3 days later be schizoaffective who never had any signs. And what medication is good. Thank you from a concerned parent.

2No Distortion

Ok so I am 16 and in my last year for secondary school and my school life has been fun as i have enjoyed my life so far, but since April my mum has stopped dropping me by car or picking me up by car from school so i now travel by bus, so one day on the bus i was listening to music when my mind dosed off and i started to fantasise about killing the passengers of the bus in very grotesque ways such as running there face between the tyres of cars so that there face rips off their skull and just look like a pancakes and then i would feed it to the passenger next to them and i also do something grotesque to them, and its come to point where i enjoy it, and now i can just think about it and do it to any one i want whether it be family members or class members i really have no remorse so the ways which i kill them are bloody and unreal. I do not suffer from any sort of depression, (when i searched for this question, most people had been suffering from depression or had thoughts of committing suicide which i have not yet) and i do not have any problems against the people that i think about killing it just that it makes me happy killing in my mind. I have not told anyone so far as they may laugh at me (which i would also do), i am not sure if this is something normal or if this is something i should worry about as it may lead on to much worse thing but currently i do not believe that i will complete or act out these thoughts as it is illegal and against my religion but who knows something might click and even that may not stop me. All I asking is should i tell anyone, or should i just leave it be and not act on it, and what actions should i take (also i have come to being fascinated by surgeries which involve needles and knives and also murders which involve a lot of blood and i have not played video games in a year due to exams creeping closer so i do not think that that is the problem). Thanks

I have not told anyone so far as they may laugh at me (which i would also do), i am not sure if this is something normal or if this is something i should worry about as it may lead on to much worse thing but currently i do not believe that i will complete or act out these thoughts as it is illegal and against my religion but who knows something might click and even that may not stop me.

4Fortune-telling

Recently, I have been imagining and having visions of people being killed. I have had multiple dreams where people have been killed, mostly stabbed, in all of which I have killed them. Murder has never appealed to me until quite recently and I find this very weird. I frequently have visions of random people being killed in some way and sometimes, if I’m stood in a large crowd and am feeling particularly anxious I see multiple people being murdered around me. It doesn’t scare me or disturb me, in fact it comforts me, strangely. My friends aren’t scared of me but I am scared of myself, especially since I sometimes have sudden urges to kill someone when they do something as small as call me a name. I often feel like I have no control over my actions and I do things without thinking. I am worried that I am going to do something bad at some point and I feel as if I have no control over what I might do. I would really appreciate some advice. Thank you.

My friends aren’t scared of me but I am scared of myself, especially since I sometimes have sudden urges to kill someone when they do something as small as call me a name. I am worried that I am going to do something bad at some point and I feel as if I have no control over what I might do.

3Magnification

I’m a person that struggles a lot when it comes to socialization. I’m afraid of making new friends or acquaintances out of fear they’ll just use me and discard me when I’m not useful anymore. The root of this problem comes form my childhood. My late brother was a very social person with a lot of friends, something I envied a lot, and he would often buy things for them, bring them to our house for snack parties, and go out a lot with then, but when he got diagnosed with cancer and was bedridden, they all left. This left a very negative impression about friendship in my head, and I remember my father telling me that friends don’t exist, and that people only like you for what you have. Because of this I avoided making friends and going to social gatherings. To show people I didn’t want any friends, I became a bully. I got in a lot of fights and often insulted people to leave me alone, and used to bully weaker students to make sure no one approached me. I remember very vividly my teacher telling me that people wanted to befriend me but I pushed them away. At the time I didn’t care. However, deep down, I wanted friends, I wanted to belong to a group, but my irrational fear of betrayal got the best o me. To suppress it, I became nastier to people and even started abusing my pet cat. I would often punch and kick the poor thing for no reason other than to release some of my frustration. This is something that’s haunts me to this day.

I’m a person that struggles a lot when it comes to socialization. I’m afraid of making new friends or acquaintances out of fear they’ll just use me and discard me when I’m not useful anymore.

4Fortune-telling

I’m 63 year old male. I was abused physically and emotionally from a very young age by my father. He often whipped me with a thin pigskin belt as hard as he could while he screamed at me. When I cried he would whip me until I stopped crying. I remember the feeling of imploding when I had to do this. My mother tried to make him stop but he would lock us in the bathroom while the beating took place.

2No Distortion

From the U.S. My son is getting a divorce. Only married a year. Wife pregnant. Telling everyone he is abusing her. Went to church and started crying saying she can’t believe he is there and she can’t deal with him because of his abuse and she is scared. This is my son’s church. Been there over 11 years. Rarely misses a service. She just started going when they got married. He had told her 2 days before to stop coming because she was harassing him.

2No Distortion

From the U.S.: I am not in a hurry to marry or start a family, and I have not tried as hard as I probably could have to keep a girlfriend, considering that I view my education as my highest priority, but I have always had an interest in romantic relationships.

2No Distortion

I have created a fantasy world in my head with characters and one of them talks to me in my head. Often when I’m alone I will reply to them out loud. When I was younger it was good because I was never alone. But now it is causing me to see and hear things or people that aren’t there. My parents believe I have ADHD and it’s simply an overactive imagination but I’m not so sure. It has caused me to have nightmares and get this weird feeling like someone is following me. On one hand I see the world in a way that I would never be able to, but on the other hand it’s starting to drive me crazy. What makes it worse is I used to be able to do this thing where I could tell what people were thinking, but now I can’t do it. Instead when I look at people I get this horrible feeling that they’re thinking the worst of me. I have thought about taking my life but I always talk myself out of it because I wouldn’t want to hurt my family’s feelings or make them believe I didn’t care about them or they didn’t do a good job of being supportive for me.

What makes it worse is I used to be able to do this thing where I could tell what people were thinking, but now I can’t do it. Instead when I look at people I get this horrible feeling that they’re thinking the worst of me.

8Mind Reading

I Do Realize That I Have A Few Psychopathic Traits, However, I’m Not Sure If I Am A Psychopath Or Sociopath. Recently I’ve started to question and compare my actions and thoughts to others. I’ve started to be more aware of myself. I first noticed that whenever I would be angry at someone in close with ( a partner, parent or best friend)my usual feelings that I experience for them disappear completely and it’s as if they’ve changed from the people I care about to the people that I hate the most. So I did research starting from there. I’ve then realized that I lack empathy, guilt, remorse, compassion, you name it. However, I feel empathy for animals, not for humans. This is what’s making me confused. Once I’ve hurt someone, mostly emotionally, I wouldn’t feel guilty, even after my feelings for them have returned (after calming down). I’ve also realized that I’m very manipulative and dominant, I hate it whenever I feel like I’m not in control. I become more aggressive. And once something doesn’t go my way, I play as the victim or I try to make the person feel guilty or pity me so that they can give in. I don’t lie often, mostly because I don’t feel the need to since I don’t do bad things, I don’t mind following the rules as I think that they’re fair and don’t interfere with my life. I do lie sometimes, whenever I need to, I always get away with it. I also have superficial charm, it’s much easier to do online, I’ve noticed that people would fall for me in a matter of days to even a few hours. I don’t think that I am very narcissistic because I do have insecurities but sometimes I would feel like I am better than others, but that kind of feeling disappears quickly. I’ve been told that I can be cruel at times, I do admit that I am, especially towards people I dislike. I also feel satisfaction in seeing them hurt. I have a partner and I do get tremendously jealous, to the point that it’s emotionally violent for my partner. I would like to add that I also get bored very easily. (From Canada)

I first noticed that whenever I would be angry at someone in close with ( a partner, parent or best friend)my usual feelings that I experience for them disappear completely and it’s as if they’ve changed from the people I care about to the people that I hate the most. I’ve then realized that I lack empathy, guilt, remorse, compassion, you name it.

0All-or-nothing thinking

My husband(57) is a Phys Ed teacher and sports coach. He deals with thousands of students every day, but he always seems to have his favourites — normally girls of 18-20 who pour out their problems to him about being raped by family members/friends and appeal to his fatherly/protective side. There was even a case where the young girl was sending nude photos to him on her phone — which unfortunately my teenage daughter happened to see. We all went for counselling a few years ago, but now he has this relationship with a young girl who he coached softball last year. I picked up some vibes last year and challenged him but he said they were very close and he was helping her with some issues as she has been raped by her uncle at an early age.

2No Distortion

I am wondering if this is normal or something that I should be concerned about (To be clear, I’m not afraid for safety.), if it’s an issue that needs attention. My husband has ocd, ADHD, and a mild form of turrets. He doesn’t like wetness (no wet kisses, absolutely zero desire to have anything to do with a vagina). He’s a butt liking guy. He seems to be put off by sex itself as he wants to converse the entire time about my thong and sometimes even pretending to have one of us get shot or stabbed in the belly. Nothing can be mentioned about sex. It’s all about the thong, and scenarios of getting stabbed or shot. He can’t keep an erection without this. It’s so unfulfilling for me as I only have my imagination that he’s being normal, passionate and enjoying all of me in bed. For me to get anywhere myself, I need this imagination and certain maneuvers for stimulation. When he requires constant talking from me, I can’t even have that. (Though he gets upset if I don’t climax first. This gentleman way of letting the girl go first is sweet, but he doesn’t help in any way other than thrusting. I’ve tried to talk about it, it’s like asking a favor that he can’t stand doing, which kills it.) I don’t know why he is so put off by sex and my female parts. I know it’s not me. I know that I am fun, kinky, clean and full of passion. There has got to be something that is making him like this, either from a genetic reason or an experience in his life, or both. I need advice and someone to help me understand what it is that he has, a mental or sexual disorder? He’s also a high functioning alcoholic and mentally and psychologically controlling and abusive sometimes as well, if that information helps. I need to understand what I’m dealing with here as I don’t know what to do.

I don’t know why he is so put off by sex and my female parts. I know it’s not me. I know that I am fun, kinky, clean and full of passion. There has got to be something that is making him like this, either from a genetic reason or an experience in his life, or both.

10Labeling

Hi. My daughter is over 18 and she is dating a guy who is also over 18, is missing one eye, has no education, no job, and no money. he makes her pay for his lunch, dinner, etc. they spend a lot of time together. he seems abusive and does not let her hang out with any other friends. he intends to marry her but he has made it clear that he is not going to cover living expenses. My daughter has a degree and a full time job. I have told my daughter that she would be miserable in this marriage but she doesn’t listen. she just fights with me. what should I do? I love my daughter and I don’t want to see her miserable. Everyone says they are adults and I should let them make their own decisions and mistakes. I am looking for another answer. If you can offer any help, I would appreciate it.

2No Distortion

My girlfriend told me last year that she was diagnosed with schizophrenia, but now she tells me that she was diagnosed with schizotypical personality disorder, she’s supposed to be taking an atypical anti-psychotic for here psychosis and hallucinations, but she stopped it anyway. However, we never met except for twice, though she hangs out almost freely with friends, but she never hangs out with me or even talk to me on the phone because she says that I rise her level of anxiety, she seems to be uncaring and selfish, I can never let out any negative feelings of mine with her because it rises her anxiety and she acts uncaring and selfish, and she turns the table around to make her the center of the situation, I had a surgery last week and guess what, she went to the movies the same day. she said she was trying to distract herself. I don’t know if she’s toxic or not, but I can’t leave the relationship because i’m afraid she would suicide or harm herself in anyway. what should I do? (From Egypt)

However, we never met except for twice, though she hangs out almost freely with friends, but she never hangs out with me or even talk to me on the phone because she says that I rise her level of anxiety, she seems to be uncaring and selfish, I can never let out any negative feelings of mine with her because it rises her anxiety and she acts uncaring and selfish, and she turns the table around to make her the center of the situation, I had a surgery last week and guess what, she went to the movies the same day. I don’t know if she’s toxic or not, but I can’t leave the relationship because i’m afraid she would suicide or harm herself in anyway.

10Labeling

From the U.S.: I just finished my third year of college. I currently have a 2.614 GPA, but it is about to plummet. My mom is a high school counselor with many degrees, so she expects at least a 3.25 GPA from me. After each year of college, I never showed my mom my final grades, and just tried to get her to forget about them over the summer, but each summer, she has checked them and confronted me at random times to tell me that I should be very ashamed of myself for wasting my dad and her money by not taking school seriously and that she will pull me out of school if I keep it up.

2No Distortion

From Canada: We had been going out for two years and a half, loved listening rock music together and we were first loves. He was my first and I was his. We would have celebrated our third year together June 12th 2016 had he not broken up with me on march 7th. I loved him so much, but I began slipping away when he wasn’t trying to get me anymore (didn’t make me feel wanted) so then I started being distant, rude, and it wasn’t hard for me to start arguments on anything. I realize I pushed him away so much. When we had arguments he saw me as an evil person who didn’t know when to stop arguing. I realize we had a serious lack of communication, and that I was trying to get his love back by fighting and making him feel bad so he would love me more. That logic makes no sense, I know. I feel incredibly sorry about everything I have done to push him away in the relationship. We moved in together for our first year of university and that is when things started to go down. I didn’t cook much, didn’t listen to him, anything. I would love for him to see how wonderful I truly am and not the person he’d been with for the past year. His parents are very much involved in his life. On the night before he broke up with me I texted him because he hadn’t texted me in two days (we went home for march break) and was upset over it. He told me he wanted to spend time with his family and that if I had nothing good to say to not text him. I left him alone but I called him around 11pm. He was drunk at a friends. I told him our relationship was obviously over if he were to do things like that, I swore a bit on text, etc. The next day he texted me he was on his way home, that I was to find my own drive and that he was going up with his parents and moving out because he couldn’t do this anymore. His parents told him to move out, I am fairly certain. Some parts of our texts he said he still has feelings, and at the end he told me no. Please help fix this!

I feel incredibly sorry about everything I have done to push him away in the relationship.

5Personalization

Hi, this has been bothering me for quite some time. I am looking to get some clarity about some major psychological symptoms I suffered from in the past which actually became alleviated on there own. Now in hindsight I’m wondering what happened. I am a 36yr old female. When I was between the ages of 11-19 my home life was incredibly tumultuous and stressful. Not surprisingly, I suffered from insomnia and from 16-19 began taking a fair amount of Melatonin to try and get my sleep cycle back in order – which didn’t work. All of my symptoms only came on at night – not when I was sleeping but the house was quiet and everyone else in bed. I would have auditory hallucinations of people talking in the attic above me or outside my window. Always just low enough so I couldn’t make out what they were saying but loud enough that I was absolutely positive someone was there. I was also incredibly paranoid about people breaking into my house (and thinking I would hear people breaking in) which would lead me to be up and down all night checking out sounds and checking doors to make sure they were locked. This went on almost every night for months at a time over several years. Eventually, I moved out, began to create healthy limits with my family and the symptoms subsided. Aside from a few episodes of sleep-walking, everything was pretty normal until I was about 27-29. I moved into a house with my not-yet husband and was unhappy at my job but the stress was nowhere near the level of my previous home life. Again, the symptoms resurfaced. I wasn’t sleeping. I was stay awake or sit up in bed for hours because I kept thinking I heard people breaking into the house. I was hearing noises and get up again and again all night checking things out, only to have no signs of anything amiss. Eventually, the symptoms subsided, I quit my job and haven’t had these symptoms since. Yes, I do have a history of mental illness in the family – Bi-polor disorder, schizo-affective disorder and major anxiety disorders. Can someone explain what may have been happening to me? I appreciate this so much.

I was also incredibly paranoid about people breaking into my house (and thinking I would hear people breaking in) which would lead me to be up and down all night checking out sounds and checking doors to make sure they were locked.

7Overgeneralization

I am a 27-year-old female mental health therapist. I have a history of depression. It looks like a dysthymic disorder most of the time with some severe episodes occurring every one to two years or so. I am married to someone who is very positive and carefree. Needless to say, marriage has been difficult for us and I am now considering leaving after 16 months. Because I come from a culture in which marriage and community are important, I am torn between that part of myself and the part that is immersed in a greater individualistic culture that values personal happiness and fulfillment.

2No Distortion

I am currently in my second semester of college and have lost all of my motivation to keep up with my course load. I have lost my motivation because I feel that no matter what I do, I am not making any progress towards my goal of having a fulfilling life.

I have lost my motivation because I feel that no matter what I do, I am not making any progress towards my goal of having a fulfilling life.

1Emotional Reasoning

Hello. I am sure this has been asked before but I figured I would try anyway. I am confused about myself. Not that I am sad, or depressed, quite the opposite. I don’t care about people… Weird to say, but I just can’t relate with them. I can’t feel their pain, I can’t sympathize. I can’t anything! I don’t feel bad about it either. I realized that I play this role of being a friendly person, pretending to understand others and their idiotic problems. No offence to anyone. It’s like people make such big fusses about little things, like “oh no I broke my phone, I’m gonna die.” I just don’t understand. I even think about hurting people, sometimes more than just hurt. I thought, maybe I’m some type of sociopath or psychopath. But I do have feelings, somewhat. I can be excited about getting new art supplies, and I love my cat very much. So I couldn’t possibly be emotionless. I don’t know. I am going to get a therapist as soon as possible. I have been through a lot through my life/childhood, including the death of my father due to drugs. I also lived in a very violent home, in extreme poverty and am now living in a single parent household. I was hoping to get some opinions? I know this is not an actual diagnosis. I am quite aware. I don’t really know anything about this website, let alone if this is the type of stuff put on here, but oh well. Farewell.

I realized that I play this role of being a friendly person, pretending to understand others and their idiotic problems.

10Labeling

Hello! I’m struggling for now 4 years without telling it to anyone. I’m just not happy and I’m done feeling like this. I always thought that that was just a phase and it would go away with time but everything got worse when I entered middle school, I started having strong body image issues, I even got an eating disorder for two years. But since summer 2015, I kind of controlled this eating disorder and I’ve been eating “normally” since. But throwing up every time I was eating was my way to feel like I was in control, but since I tried to recover from it, I feel like I have nothing in control, so I found this feeling of control in self-harm but my anxiety got even worser. It became so unhealthy that it has an impact on my physical health. I’m not trying to get a diagnosis but just some advices on how to talk to my parents (that know absolutely nothing about it, they just think I’m someone very nervous) even if I know that it would tear them apart to know that I self-harmed and how bad I feel. Or is there a way to make them subtly understand that something’s wrong without directly going to them? Thank you very much for reading this!

I’m not trying to get a diagnosis but just some advices on how to talk to my parents (that know absolutely nothing about it, they just think I’m someone very nervous) even if I know that it would tear them apart to know that I self-harmed and how bad I feel.

8Mind Reading

First of all, I’d like to apologize in advance if this isn’t as coherent as you’d like; my thoughts have the tendency to be a bit disorganized. Please don’t hate me. I just turned 20 and I was diagnosed with Schizophrenia and Major Depression when I was 17. I was later diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Mania. I’m really sad all the time. I’ve taken lots of different kinds of medication but they don’t work at all (except for Xanax). One of the problems I’ve been having is that I don’t seem to react to situations the way people around me do. I’m hypersensitive about what people think about me. Sometimes I get really upset about great things. I recently met a great girl and we got along really well so I started crying and tried to kill myself. Other times, people will hurt me and do really bad things to me, and it makes me laugh. If I get too excited about something like a new job, a trip to somewhere fun or even just a really good song, it makes me want to die. But at the same time I’m happy… Sometimes I think about hurting people I care about to show them how much I love them. When my friends do nice things for me, I want to stab them and hold them in my arms but I know that’s not polite. I avoid certain social situations like parties because I fear my excitement may cause me to become suicidal. It’s all really confusing. Is there anything I can do to be more like normal people? I want to be a good person; I don’t want to be evil.

2No Distortion

Hello, my husband has started a friendship with a workmate (female) 4 months ago, she is married we met her and her family. At first I was ok with it but I started getting jealous with the way my husband is extra attentive to her- we have other female friends too but to my observation he does not behave the way he is with them. He admitted that he like her more than he like our other friends, he enjoyed picking her up from home to go to work, it was his idea to carpool. He loves inviting them for family barbeque. He said he wants me to be friends with her- I am trying but my jealousy is still here. My husband is aware that I am jealous of his friendship with this person but assures me it is only friendship, a platonic one. Is it me who just had the problem, I admitted to him that I am jealous of the time he spent with her, like he would pick her up for work but have to go earlier so that they can have a coffee at her place ( sometimes the husband is home, other times it is just her at home). He asks me if I am ok, but when I say Iam not ok with this he seems not to be able to understand.Am I just stressing myself?

2No Distortion

Hi. I have a problem forming relationships with people. I’ve been working at this place for like 8 months and i still find it really difficult forming interpersonal relationships with everyone here. Not only people in the work place but also family members. I’ve noticed that every time I’m joking around and laughing with someone and getting along with them extremely well, i tend to back off and completely shut down after I’ve noticed that I’m happy or talking a lot. It’s really weird. I do have self-esteem issues and self-confidence issues and i believe i suffer from social anxiety and depression. I so badly want to form relationships with people but it’s like I’m not even allowing myself to you know? My childhood COULD have been better. My dad was a hermit and he didn’t talk to people that well and my mom was an alcoholic at the time so i don’t know if that has something to do with anything. I do remember that i was distant from people even when i was a kid as well. Well not so much distant but it seemed like i needed permission from my friends to go with them places, like i needed to know that i was needed and they liked being around me. I just want to know like what the hell is wrong with me? I just want to be happy. I want to feel normal and BE normal. HELP!

2No Distortion

I am a shy person by nature, I generally dislike and don’t care to be social. But in this past year I’ve gone further than that, rather what I would call paranoid tendencies. Even so much that I’m afraid to tell people my name, how old I am, and similar information, so I often end up lying. When I say something truthful I want to punch myself.

But in this past year I’ve gone further than that, rather what I would call paranoid tendencies. Even so much that I’m afraid to tell people my name, how old I am, and similar information, so I often end up lying.

3Magnification

I find myself increasingly disillusioned with society and with my peers. In my classes, I feel like there is a lack of focus on important issues and my attempts to provoke conversations on current affairs in the world and how they should be dealt with, specifically in terms of race, domestic policy, and global issues. I feel as if moving on to higher education will not be worth it. I feel if I were to apply myself to some field and envelop myself in my work that it would allow free-loaders to succeed and ride my coattails. I feel as if my peers are rats who lie about their feelings and their interests. They’ll argue that they care very much for social issues such as global minorities facing persecution (the Rohingya, Muslim minority in Myanmar, the Sudanese) yet they never say anything about these issues unless prompted by me. Furthermore, those conversations are one-sided and ephemeral because they quickly grow bored discussing issues they don’t care about. Should I continue to pursue personal goals?

I feel as if moving on to higher education will not be worth it. I feel if I were to apply myself to some field and envelop myself in my work that it would allow free-loaders to succeed and ride my coattails.

4Fortune-telling

My girlfriend had a manic/psychotic episode in Oct. As far as her parents know it was her first. She spent money, drank, didn’t sleep, was sexually promiscuous and thought she was an angel. She was put on meds and went to therapy. She stopped going to group therapy b/c she said that they all had problems. She did continue to see a therapist for a bit. She stopped b/c she did not think the therapist was helping her. She said that they would just talk for 5 min. and then would let her go. We split up during this time, but kept in contact. We decided to get back together and take it slow.

2No Distortion

Today, I had to call the authorities on my boyfriend. He has been sharing these thoughts of his. The other day he messaged me saying his head was telling him to skin his (10-year-old) sister and his brother and taste their blood. I was at loss for words but I had been trying to get him to tell me what was wrong. A part of me kind of wishes I hadn’t asked. I want him to get some help. He has been cutting and punching things messing up his hands. I have always been suicidal so I can’t relate to him. I just want to try to understand. I’m so lost and confused imp worried I might say the wrong thing. I told my best friend and he told my dad. My dad said if he doesn’t get help then we can’t be together. Mind you I turn 18 in 2 months so what he says doesn’t matter. I’m just so scared. He has been controlling over me and even violent a couple of times. But when I confronted him about it he didn’t know he was doing anything wrong. He has PTSD from watching his twin brother her die in front of him in a car wreck. He usually sat in the same seat but the day of the accident he switched seats with his brother. he blames himself because his dad blamed him before he passed away of cancer in prison for drug distribution. I’m kind of scared of him sometimes. I cut my hand on accident once cooking and his eyes when he seen the blood, he was like a completely different person. like he had no soul for a minute until he calmed down. he feels like killing people when they annoy him. and I’m always cautious around him now. But I’m in love with him. and I just want him to get help. I called his school. instead of calling the cops which is what the crisis team wanted me to do. and I talked to him. he has agreed to go to the hospital to get help. but I didn’t tell him I told the school and the school told his mom. I’m scared on how he will react to that. I just need some advice. I have no idea what to do. And now I’m getting some bad thoughts too. I have learned to control them. But I use drugs to help me. and he’s okay with it. he’s okay with me cutting and using drugs. I know that’s messed up. I just don’t know.

I know that’s messed up.

6Should statements

My parents are in their 50’s and have begun hoarding stuff and their quality of life is greatly diminished. They have raccoons living in the attic, there are open holes in the side of the house, both have collected things beyond what can healthfully fit in their space, they have 8 cats and some other little things I am concerned about. The house is a constant mess because they can’t keep up with maintenance and general cleaning. I do know they realize that some things need to change, like plugging holes in the house that raccoons are getting in but when i offer help or suggestions they are super sensitive or just say “i know, but”. There is always an excuse or reason they have not gotten to it yet. I live across the country and can’t physically help around the house. There is a extensive history of self esteem issues with both parents. So how do i talk to them and help them realize I am extremely concerned about their lifestyle without them shutting down or getting extremely hurt?

2No Distortion

My 27 year old son recently had what seems to be a schizophrenic episode. He had been suffering for years with social skills issues and sleep problems. Recently graduated from law school. He has a fear of being around people and hears voices, started neglecting personal hygiene, spends compulsively (ie. Bought 4 jackets exactly alike, 3 still in the package.) but does not have the budget for it. The real problem, every time he goes to get help they accuse him of just wanting to get drugs, but he hates taking any drugs. Also, doesn’t think he has a problem except the sleep issue. He keeps saying if he could just get sleep everything will be fine, even after a good night’s sleep. How do we convince health care providers there is a problem? He can sound quite normal in some situations, until you manage to catch a comment that is off the wall.

2No Distortion

I have a 5 year old daughter and am pregnant by my current boyfriend of the last two years. He put a camera in the bathroom at my mom’s house. We have never had any issues and he has always treated my daughter as his own. I need some advice on what others would do? I want him in the delivery room when I go into labor but my family thinks it’s the wrong choice. He was arrested for unlawful eavesdropping and survalince. He was bonded out after 2 days. My parents think I am a bad parent for wanting him to be there knowing what he did. I need to know what others think because I love my kids and never want to lose them and at this time my parents are telling me they will take my kids. And they know I would never let that happen. I have always been controlled by my parents and they feel like their own opinion is the only and right one. Please help and give me your honest opinion. My dad feels like I need to talk to a therapist and this is a lot for a pregnant woman to handle without someone to talk to. I think my parents are taking it too far to say that since he did this he will mess with my kids. The camera was also never used and had to be used within my mom’s home so I don’t think he knew how it worked before putting it there.

have always been controlled by my parents and they feel like their own opinion is the only and right one.

8Mind Reading

I’m an 17 yr old Indian with ADHD and i want to pursue medicine and PG in forensic medicine.I cannot concentrate even for two minutes and i’m afraid that it’ll affect my career.I got my 12th results yesterday and found it disappointing as i expected better grades.My mom is extremely mad at me.I have an entrance exam two days later.She said to perform well in it (i’m not interested but my parents insisted).I actually have not prepared to a level to acquire a good score and i’m ashamed of it.Also a month later we’ve another one (really i’m interested in this) but my mom says don’t completely rely on a single option.The problem is that if don’t do well in the first one, my family and relatives will be really mad at me and i’m scared thinking about it.Also the one in which I’m interested has a tough competition so chances that i’ll get into it are extremely low.I’m feel guilty for betraying my parent’s faith in me.They are unaware that i’ve ADHD and i’m scared to tell them about it.I can’t concentrate on anything and within a few minutes i either start creating scenes in my mind or distracted easily.I want to stop it but I can’t.This habit has reduced my productivity.This is also a reason that i haven’t prepared for my exam.I don’t know how to handle this and i also don’t want to let down my parent’s hope.Help me please.

The problem is that if don’t do well in the first one, my family and relatives will be really mad at me and i’m scared thinking about it. Also the one in which I’m interested has a tough competition so chances that i’ll get into it are extremely low.I’m feel guilty for betraying my parent’s faith in me.

4Fortune-telling

Hi i’m an 18 year old girl and i’m diagnosed with ADD, GAD, and depression. after trying other meds, i’m only on zoloft atm. basically i’ve been starting to lose hope for myself. i’ve been to many different therapists and tried a few other medications. i don’t know if i will ever be able to live a normal life. i’m afraid of everything. lately i’ve been concerned about myself more because i have moments where i feel just detached from reality. as if i’m watching life through a screen. sometimes the person i see in the mirror looks like a stranger to me. i haven’t told my therapist about this because i don’t know if it’s just my anxiety or if i actually have the disorder. i haven’t told my family because i don’t want to worry them even more for me. my depression doesn’t help either. if nothings real why try in life? it feels like i won’t be able to ever leave any sort of impact.

i don’t know if i will ever be able to live a normal life. i’m afraid of everything. lately i’ve been concerned about myself more because i have moments where i feel just detached from reality.

4Fortune-telling

I know I need to go to the doctors but before I do I wanted to get other opinions. I’ll start at the beginning; when I was in year 4 I used to scrap my hands on the floor and hurt myself, pinching, pushing my eyes. Things like that. Self-harm has been something I have done a lot, I have also cut for several years but now it is burning myself. However, I have not had an incident in a few months.

I know I need to go to the doctors but before I do I wanted to get other opinions.

6Should statements

I started dating my boyfriend almost 2 years ago. At that time, he was a student living in a student’s house of 6, and two of his housemates are his close friends(a guy and a girl. The girl is around my age while the guy is a lot younger). They liked to hang out together, especially my boyfriend and this girl whose rooms happened to be next to each other.

2No Distortion

From the U.S.: I have an adult son 35 yrs old. Kind, caring good person. Good job, supports himself, lives alone. He and I have always been very close. He is obese 400 lbs+, colon cancer survivor, diabetic, sleep apnea, anxiety and depression. No close friends, no social life. We do not live in the same state. He says he is lonely and hates being fat. He does see a therapist on a regular basis.

2No Distortion

Dx’ed cptsd. therapist feels unsure what works for me and we are still investigating. MDD also issue and of late have been disengaging and broke sobriety last session Drinkin prior to session yet we did an anger excer. I felt some release also felt it could be dangerous to do alone. I requested add., appt. from therapist since i had been in crisis. She had asked me if I wanted a referral. I was asking for an add., appointment. I wrote to her via email which I never do. expressed my feeling that it sounded as if she was again questioning if she wanted to work w me. I feel that what I wrote was true but also express anger (depression frustration w progress ) even thu I understand I feel I am Now faced with therapist uncertainty since as she put it unsure what works for me and if she is not meeting my needs will refer out. This I feel is more of her issue over what I wrote along with my break in sobriety . Today, she was late and if she was running late in the past she w tex me as a curisity. When she arrived 10min late having no apology. Then she indicated she had 10min to finish up her lunch. After 15min waved her hand to proceed to her office. In procession she was in in an small area hidden out of site were the copier was I saw her and she said go on in. She came in shortly afterward and stated she was going to make a copy of the emails i sent to her this took yet another 5min. while in session I discussed up dates and my feeling of over the past several days and my feeling of progress. She also advised me we would review the emails i sent. She told me in no uncertain terms she would not give me any additional time until we come to some idea on how to work together. she cut the session short after her being late and gave an extra 15min wait time prior to visit. the entire interview was 35mins . She was finished even giving a honest attempt to discuss matters opened her door for me to leave turned her back on me she indicated she has scheduled me for the month of Sept., yet I have paid to be within a journal group which last thru sept. As I began to leave her office she also turned around to leave. I allowed her to understand that I felt her distaste of me and her attitute toward me requesting her to drop such . she reminded me that the session was over went into bath with door open turned around again with the same look of distaste on her face, she then smerked as she closed the door. Unfinished business and I feel termination is going to happen not that there is anyone else who will treatment me that specializing in tramua treatment to the extent that she has been and continues to train in. I again mentioned as I did in email has we walked down the hall if you do not want to treat me just say so. She and I have had diff in past just about a year ago when I called a break she took it as a termination. Yet accepted me back 3months later only to advise me of referrals both of which have been cited for breeches and disaplined with the Off., of Pro dis. she is aware of it . I fully understand that i wish to heal and i also respect her abilities however I feel again she is in decision making to terminate me. She knows me and I feel and expressed to her that this isnt just about me she did acknowledge it. As last week it was apparent she needed affirmation from me that the anger work was useful. But I informed her that I wa not sure if I would be able to do this excercise safely fearful i would get more sucked in and not be able to get out therefore lashing out on others . she understood that I believe as she eluded to affirm my decision as wise mind. I also stated yes and self awareness. Not acknowledged. she feels insulted and so do I I can get over it but she has again seems uninterested to treat even thu further appts scheduled. I asked her to lose her attitute toward me and that last wks session i felt became about her since she was not able to accept my affirmation of the theraptic session. I have been deeply depressed anger is real. I want to heal yet I do not have the reason to believe that she is willing. Now I want for next week to awaiting any if any discussion of our relationship which she has allowed me full understanding until we come to an agreement on what and how we work together are in place. I lack faith that she will to be resonable and I pushed her buttons apparently today. ended the session after 35min. What is ure thoughts. I feel her lack of desire to fully engage in any discussion. The facts of her rudeness toward me and yes I responded in rudeness and I regret it. She was willing to make a referal last week which confused me since I just wanted an additional appt. Games being Played on me? I just feel so defeated and vunerable as she what believe is in processes of searching for some other person to treat me. and I cannot will not begin again. I cannot. No resolve just hostility toward me and back at her. I have allowed her to know I see and her her anger toward me yet she says nothing and makes decisions to further destroy the relationship Thoughts plz.

I fully understand that i wish to heal and i also respect her abilities however I feel again she is in decision making to terminate me. As last week it was apparent she needed affirmation from me that the anger work was useful.

8Mind Reading

I have been struggling for a long time with thoughts and issues that I cannot explain. I cannot figure out what is wrong with me, but there must be. I have been to counselors before but have never had the courage to approach them with these things. We talked about my depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, and social issues, but somehow it seems wrong to speak these other things out loud.

I cannot figure out what is wrong with me, but there must be.

5Personalization

My ss is 17. I’ve been in his life since age 6. He has always lied and been spiteful. Since I met his mom, he was constantly getting in trouble at school and barely made it thru each year. Now he has school online and only goes in a couple days a week and he’s getting all F’s. His mom has always had a hard time calling him out but I haven’t. The lying has never stopped. He just got better at it. He learned how to lie with sincerity.

He has always lied and been spiteful.

7Overgeneralization

I’m separated from my ex of 27 yrs, but still keep in regular touch, she has asked me to remain friends. Over the years my ex feels that I’ve let her down too many times and has collected all of these thoughts together and is now very resentful of me.

2No Distortion

I have a real catch 22 situation which may sound trivial BUT my job which I love requires me to maintain a social media presence that I hate it & posting photos of myself is really not something I like doing but without my job/business suffers I try to force myself to do it but sometimes I just can’t. It’s not a body image thing it’s more I feel like a dick doing it and it seems very contrived & superficial but the only one suffering as a result of not doing it is me. Is there a way around this?

It’s not a body image thing it’s more I feel like a dick doing it and it seems very contrived & superficial but the only one suffering as a result of not doing it is me.

10Labeling

I’ve been seeing the best therapist I’ve ever worked with for almost three years and, in that time, he’s helped me significantly, including with coming out as trans and gay and gaining confidence to date and try out relationships. I’ve been on several dates with a great guy who is also trans and gay and we just discovered that we see the same therapist. I would say the chances were slim but my therapist is out as a queer man and many of his clients are queer. Additionally, as I’m out socializing more, trying new bars and parties, and meeting more people, I realize that my therapist and I will likely be running in similar circles.

2No Distortion

From the U.S.: Since young I had constant mood swings and extreme emotions. I said things that weren’t logical or had any sense at all. Most of the times I’ll get so mad I’ll hit someone or say horrible things to them. Had problems with self harm and people thinking that something was wrong inside my head.

Since young I had constant mood swings and extreme emotions. I said things that weren’t logical or had any sense at all.

7Overgeneralization

I drank sometimes in high school like most teenagers, and in college, I started drinking more. I’d have a few shots sometimes on weekdays and weeknights, sometimes in class. Sometimes it was by myself, sometimes in front of my friends. On weekends I would drink more, like a pretty normal college student. Sometimes I drink because of stress but it really doesn’t feel like a consistent coping mechanism. One weekend, I had to be taken to the ER for alcohol poisoning. To me, it just seemed like I just drank too much too quickly but a counselor asked me if my drinking was related to feelings of depression.

2No Distortion

From a teen in the U.S.: My parents have been separated for 2 years. At first I was very upset with my mom because she cheated on my father. Eventually I’ve grown past the anger I felt towards her but my dad is still very bitter. She got a lot of my dads money in the divorce, he is obviously upset about that which I understand. I feel like the details of their divorce and the problems in their marriage are none of my business which is why I try my best to stay out of it.

2No Distortion

About 5 years ago, I made a deal with my dad that I would try out 10 episodes of his favorite TV show because he really wanted me to try it. Then he said if I didn’t like it, I wouldn’t have to watch it anymore. I didn’t like it — sci-fi isn’t my genre. Anyway, my dad has asked a few times every year since then if I’ll try the show again, and I always say no and remind him I don’t like it. He says I didn’t give it a fair shot, and basically says anyone would like it. It involves some gory things like worms coming out of someone’s stomach, and I hate watching any violence or gory things. He tries to argue with me about why I’ll like it, but I’ve always hated sci-fi. I’ve offered to watch a show that we both like together. My dad has said multiple times “there’s no way you’re my daughter” or “you can’t be my daughter” since I hate sci-fi. I’m adamant against watching this show because I think he’s not respecting my answer and always wanted his kids to be interested in what he is interested in. He has tried to manipulate me by saying he would do what his father asked, and that if I’m so inflexible on this I’m bound to have problems in future relationships. He has said he doesn’t ask much of me. My dad has guilt-tripped me my whole life and has always been controlling. Maybe my resistance is partially coming from a huge history. Recently he asked again and I said no– I have a big problem being assertive, and I’m practicing sticking up for myself. I very rarely stick up for myself with my dad because he’s so overbearing.

My dad has said multiple times “there’s no way you’re my daughter” or “you can’t be my daughter” since I hate sci-fi. He has tried to manipulate me by saying he would do what his father asked, and that if I’m so inflexible on this I’m bound to have problems in future relationships.

3Magnification

From the U.S.: I’ve been in therapy and taken many different medications for close to 30 years. In the last 8-9 months my MDD has become medication resistant and is worse than I ever thought possible. I’ve tried ECT (3 treatments) and it did not help at all. I’m doing a litany of self-help wellness things that have taken over my entire life and I’m just getting worse. I take Effexor, Adderal & Clonapin. I do yoga, meditate daily, swim 2-3 times a week, see a therapist weekly, eat very nutritionally, get plenty of sleep but not too much,

I’m doing a litany of self-help wellness things that have taken over my entire life and I’m just getting worse.

3Magnification

I’m asking for your help and I’m hopeful that you can point me in the right direction. The shape of my life is good, but there are lingering anxieties that have not resolved themselves in time. I’ve had the painful experience of being the target of bullying numerous times throughout my life. I’ve grown increasingly immune to bullying but unbeknownst to me a symptom has emerged. These episodes of bullying were traumatic but the most traumatic aspect was the breach of trust because the bullying came from friends and family. As such I experience social anxiety and emotionally stress. I am a heterosexual male, fairly honest, emphatic, and trustworthy but that has been put into question by bullies who attack my lack of manliness. I’m actually a good looking man who attracts women but that creates jealousy and unintentionally provokes bullying. The bullies project onto me their own insecurities. These include two highly controversial sexual preferences, one more so than the other. They are: homosexuality and pedophilia. It takes a higher level of emotional maturity to recognize that homosexuality is perfectly fine but pedophilia is a sexual disorder, distinct from child molestation which is a crime. In my opinion no one wants to be sick, so on one wants to be a pedophile nor depressed nor schizophrenic nor anxious, etc. People want to happy and healthy. I cannot cure those bullies with their insecurities and I cannot cure myself. I know the truth of who I am, but I sometimes feel anxious all the same. It rattled my bones. I use to become easily unnerved whenever homosexuality was discussed positively or negatively. Not so much these days. However, being bullied and told you’re a pedophile carries such a heavy social stigma that has taken longer to recover from. I should point out that I never had any issues with homosexuality and respected such preferences. I never had any issues being around children, and my brother asked me to be the godfather of his son because I was so responsible. I’ve lost sight of that. It has been forgotten due to social anxiety and emotional trauma. My question is simple. Should I seek professional help to rid myself of this cognitive dissonance or will it pass with time? My problem is I have become self-absorbed because of bullying, but I really want to reconnect with others.

However, being bullied and told you’re a pedophile carries such a heavy social stigma that has taken longer to recover from.

10Labeling

I understand the whole be happy your alive and the it could be worse stuff, but I am so sick of my life.  I have always worked hard, but I am never respected in my field.  I am broke all the time.  I do not have a family and the friends I have I don’t like to hang out with them because I’m always so miserable compared to them.  I just spent all my money and worked hard to make a career change that I thought would make me happy and give me more time to work on my painting career.  I am now broke, can’t afford to live in my apartment (I am going to live out of my car starting next month).  Nothing I do makes me happy anymore.  Art used to always make me happy, but I am so upset I can’t afford to do it any more I feel sick thinking about it.  I really don’t want to live without having a family.  Nothing I do anymore matters.  I do not qualify for any help programs because of my previous job, but all the money I made from that went into changing my career and I have nothing now.  I got my new credentials to do the new job, but I’m completely broke.  I really don’t want to live a life of being broke all the time.  It is so stressful to worry and I am not a person that can handle it.  The constant phone calls from collects, losing my apartment, scared to buy food every meal.  I have been disappointed with my life for the past 19 years. Everything I try at, I lose or fail.  I keep trying to continue on, but I don’t want this to be it.  I’m getting too old to be know where and failing this badly.  I so tried of feeling like trash everyday, I just want to know how to deal with living a life you don’t want and how to find happiness when there is nothing in your life to be happy about. (From the USA)

Everything I try at, I lose or fail.

7Overgeneralization

From a teen in Canada: um… I really don’t know how to say this but I’ve been wanting to have a mental disorder for years now, and I know you will think I’m just seeking attention like everyone else, but I’m not. There’s no one who i want to pay attention to me. In all honesty, I think it’s because I want people to stay away from me… to fear me, almost.

I really don’t know how to say this but I’ve been wanting to have a mental disorder for years now, and I know you will think I’m just seeking attention like everyone else, but I’m not.

8Mind Reading

My mother has always been very controlling so when it came to graduating high school, I was very excited to be going off to college. However, my mother, who insists that she “would rather die than live without” me, continuously threw temper tantrums and complained to every family member possible until I caved and went to a university close to home. For the past 3 1/2 years, I have been commuting back and forth. I felt like I have missed so much of the college experience and have such little freedom compared to everyone else my age.

For the past 3 1/2 years, I have been commuting back and forth. I felt like I have missed so much of the college experience and have such little freedom compared to everyone else my age.

1Emotional Reasoning

From the U.S.: My problem is my 23 year old brother claims he wants to move out yet he stays with us. (I’m 26 btw) He may have a job, but he doesn’t help around the house. My mother makes him contribute financially. My brother steals my dad’s  xbox controller since 2014 or 2015. My brother is a massive liar. Whenever he’s confronted he’ll lie about it.

My brother is a massive liar. W

10Labeling

It took me a very long time to find a man with the intelligence, kindness, energy, talent, competence and intellectual confidence that I wanted. He is perfect in all ways but sexual, I know he loves me. He proves it every day in countless ways.For many years now, I have totally buried my sexuality. I have, in fact, denied myself and not let myself be who I am. I have felt bad for being so sexual. I would try to initiate and/or discuss sex but has left him feeling pressured, demeaned and somehow the need to feel that he needed to be changed. Now, he is stuck in his own self-awareness of all that he feels he is not. To other women he was something. To me… I thought he was something else, that’s all. As a result, we’ve been terribly unhappy. I feel I have been in the hellish grip of a major depression. This life we have created is untenable for both of us. He cannot give me the sex I want. I don’t know what he can give me anymore. I don’t yet know how much more I can do without. We have worked out so many things, our communication can’t be any stronger and yet continually fails us. I feel like it is my fault, my insecurities, my hidden pain, my lack of beauty or sexiness or my weight or any other such things. I need to reclaim myself again, letting my sexuality back out of storage. I have fallen into depression hating the very fact that I have to take full responsibility for satisfying my own sexual need.I feel rejected, unwanted and unworthy. I feel sexually abandoned. I feel trapped. I feel lesser of a human being when I have to masturbate. I feel even lesser of a human being to leave and choose sexual freedom over this relationship. I feel dismissed. I feel unimportant. I feel broken, unrepairable. I feel like I am mourning the little girl he helped me find again and now is gone, hidden, struck with the memories of why she went away to begin with. I feel that I have to worthy to leave. I have never felt worthy in my entire life. I wanted a home, he gave that. I wanted a place that I didn’t have to fear of having to start over again, ever and yet here I am. Fighting those thoughts and feelings again. I have tried to be sympathetic, adapting to his needs or lack thereof. I have tried to tell myself that I am ok without sexual intimacy. I have tried to give him the space and commitment and support that he needs. I feel like I have tried… and he has not.

I feel like it is my fault, my insecurities, my hidden pain, my lack of beauty or sexiness or my weight or any other such things. I feel lesser of a human being when I have to masturbate.

5Personalization

From the U.S.: My brother is 14 now, I’m 21. When he was around 3 or 4, and I was about 10 (vague memory) he slept over in my room all the time. But one time, after I saw a movie where people kissed, I was curious. We often kissed on the lips but one night before bed I kissed him too long. I think I just plopped my open mouth on his lips, not knowing that it was really “sexual” or “romantic” but thinking I was “practicing” so I must have known it was weird. I think it lasted like 5 seconds, and i think he told me to stop.

2No Distortion

There are movements that people do that make me feel very angry and horrible. It’s one of the main reasons I’m happy this school year is over. When someone in class would tap their feet on the ground/move their feet repetitively, click their pen, tap their hands on their desks, etc., I would feel so angry inside. I always had to use my hands to block it from my view or cover my ears. One time the girl next to me wouldn’t stop swinging her feet and I spent the whole class with my right eye closed so that I didn’t have to see it. I also have an anxiety disorder, and I’ve had to leave class many times to try to calm myself down in the bathroom because it gives me so much anxiety. Math class was the worst; the boy next to me always tapped his feet and made beats on his desk with his pens, a girl in front of me was always swinging her feet, and another girl was always bouncing/shaking her legs. I was always irritated and had so much anxiety. One time I left the class crying which I think scared my teacher a bit.

There are movements that people do that make me feel very angry and horrible.

5Personalization

From Indonesia: I’m 21 and I have a friend from another country, he knew me from penpal website, he emailed me first. he said that he wanted to know me, then we chatted via Facebook and sometimes in other messenger apps. For the first time I wasn’t interested with him, but we almost chatted every night, he is a good man and sweet, always asked my activity, and I like to share my problem with him and he always gave an advice. Day by day he makes me feel special, and I start liking him. But since 1 month ago he seldom chatted me,

2No Distortion

From a teen in the UK: I have never been diagnosed with any type of issue. But slowly, I’m feeling so lost and confused. Nothing excites me anymore, I just pretend to be happy so the people around me don’t try and console and feel sorry for me. I hate attention.

2No Distortion

I was diagnosed with depression and severe anxiety as a teenager, dealing with cutting and bulimia. As the years have gone by, I’ve been on and off of medications and while I knew I still dealt with the mental illness, I felt like I’d grown a lot. Over the last couple of years, though, things have gotten bad again. It seems that I’ll be fine or at least stable for months until something will go wrong, and it’s like a house of cards toppling over. It’ll send me spiraling into what I refer to as an episode for lack of a better word. I’ve described episodes before to my previous nurse practitioner/psychologists, but it never occurred to me until recently that I should’ve told them about the voice I would hear during the episodes. I’ve always just thought of it as my own thoughts, except way louder and more aggressive, but after reading about the difference between your own voice in your head and hearing a voice, I’m now more concerned about the episodes. The last time I had one, I ended up grabbing a bottle of pills, stealing a knife from my sister’s house, sending my mom a goodbye text, and walking the streets in 20 degree weather while cutting myself and all at the urging of what I thought to be my own thoughts. However, looking back on it, I can still hear the voice berating me, referring to me in the third person instead of first. My thinking is completely distorted during these episodes, and as soon as I come out of it (usually within a few hours), I’m embarrassed by my actions and think clearly again. For example, one time I was so anxious that no one would pick me to do a group project with them in class, that I went home and started cutting so my mom would have to take me to the hospital and I’d get to miss school the day they chose partners. Is that delusional thinking? I’ve never met someone with depression/anxiety who has episodes that intense and rapid. It’s like feeling the craziness of mania, but without the happiness/confidence. Is there a such thing as having depression with psychotic episodes or is that normal and I’m just thinking too deep into it or being a hypochondriac?

I’ve always just thought of it as my own thoughts, except way louder and more aggressive, but after reading about the difference between your own voice in your head and hearing a voice, I’m now more concerned about the episodes.

7Overgeneralization

My four-year-old daughter is an only child. We live in a wonderful community, and so she has always had plenty of time around adults and children of all ages. She has one girl cousin three years older than her whom she adores. When my daughter was two-and-a-half, my brother and his wife had a second child. Around this time, other friends began having second children.

2No Distortion

From the U.S.: I have been married for 20 years, and we have a 5-year old son and 12-year old daughter. My wife has depression, she has taken medications and went to therapy in the past, but currently is taking non-prescription supplements. She has not found therapy very successful. In addition to depression, she has menstrual issues and becomes even less productive based on her cycle.

2No Distortion

I’m sure it’s strange to see a 15 year old on this website. As of right now, I am questioning if I should seek a professional to see if I may have illness. The trauma may have not been physical, but it hurt nonetheless. About a year and a half ago I had some trouble with my 2 “friends”. One was notorious for talking about me behind my back and the other would bend me to her will and ignore my demands (in a way I was trapped in the friendship.) After a while I had the 2 meet each other. That is when it went down hill. Within a month they began to ignore me, and this hurt, as they where both close friends. I would outcry to be included once more, and they would put me down. I felt invalid and unloved, and one day, I came to realize this was true. I asked one how they truly felt about me, all these years… only to be told that I was annoying and was given a rude remark on the relationships I’ve been in. I went crazy, and I now notice this was a panic attack. Then another bombshell; the other friend began to ignore me, and when I asked the other friend if they where ignoring them as well, they said yes. Only an hour later did I send the friend a message while the other was streaming, only to see ” __ messaged me again..”. I felt my heart crush under unbearable weight, and it is burned in my mind. after 2 months, I quietly cut ties with one, and after overcoming my fears, cut ties with the other. At that time, I had a 3 hour long panic attack. 2 months later I found myself in an abusive relationship. They intervened once more, teaming up on me on my social media, their intent to kill me. During these events as a whole, I practiced self harm and had suicidal thoughts. I thought it was all my fault, even if I’d been told it wasn’t. I would like to know if this may have caused PTSD. I am still having flashbacks and panic attacks, as well as hypersensitivity. The symptoms are getting worse. I feel the sting every day. I’ve seen symptoms of it online and I match all of them, it’s scary. (age 15, from US)

I felt invalid and unloved, and one day, I came to realize this was true. I thought it was all my fault, even if I’d been told it wasn’t.

10Labeling

From the U.S.: My second husband does not seem to like my son. My son is 16. We have been married 7 years. We have 2 sons together a 1 and 6 year old. He doesn’t say much to my son. He does not say many negative things to him, but he constantly complains to me. He complains over simple issues like he drank all the soda.

My second husband does not seem to like my son.He doesn’t say much to my son. He does not say many negative things to him, but he constantly complains to me. He complains over simple issues like he drank all the soda.

8Mind Reading

Hi, within the past year I have been hospitalized three times and I have been in two treatment centers. I have been diagnosed with everything from Borderline to Bipolar with Psychosis, but all of my treating physicians say that those diagnosis’ are incorrect. I deal with chronic suicidal thoughts, frequent self-harm, I apparently engage in risky behaviors, I lack eye contact, I can’t tell the difference between different emotions, I don’t feel pain, I have social anxiety, I don’t like to be touched, I freak out if things aren’t in the right order or the same place, specific sounds drive me up a wall, I can’t concentrate with any noise, I get obsessed about certain things, I stutter whenever I read, I get overwhelmed/frustrated really easily, the only emotions I feel like I feel are angry, frustrated, and empty,and I apparently dissociate to a certain extent, I also think I may hoard some things, and I have trouble relaying to people through words what is going on/what I feel. The thing that mind-boggles me is the fact no one believes I live in two worlds, people from both world’s say that the other world isn’t real. In my other world my therapist there says that I should leave Earth so I can be there and be peaceful. I can go there, and my friends from there can come here. Sometimes they follow me around during the day and correct me when I am not doing what they want me too. I am so confused what place is real, I am sure you are going to say Earth is real, but what if it’s not, how do I know the right thing to do? Well, my psychiatrist thinks that they are just a way of me coping. Then that would mean that they aren’t real, but they are? I am so confused. My therapist has no clue. I feel like therapy just makes things worse, I end up completely “shutting down.” Medicines don’t help either. I don’t know what to do anymore. I have people pulling me every which a way, I am tired of all of this. I feel like no one understands me. I know you don’t know me but can you tell me possibly what is going on. I would appreciate anything. Thank you!

I get overwhelmed/frustrated really easily, the only emotions I feel like I feel are angry, frustrated, and empty,and I apparently dissociate to a certain extent, I also think I may hoard some things, and I have trouble relaying to people through words what is going on/what I feel.

9Mental filter

I have a lot of issues; please help me. I don’t even know where to start. I’m a 16 year old male living in New York. I am extremely shy and beat myself up over every mistake I’ve made. I literally see a mental picture of myself being punched, slapped, abused, shot, decapitated, multilated, head crushed with a building, etc. I feel deeply offended when criticized, I don’t “hang out” with my peers and feel inferior to them, never been to a party or other social gathering, I feel others are always judging me and they remember every mistake I’ve ever made even though it’s illogical to think so, I’ve never had a girlfriend, I find it hard to trust others, and my only escape is fantasies I indulge in while I’m alone.

I literally see a mental picture of myself being punched, slapped, abused, shot, decapitated, multilated, head crushed with a building, etc. I feel deeply offended when criticized, I don’t “hang out” with my peers and feel inferior to them, never been to a party or other social gathering, I feel others are always judging me and they remember every mistake I’ve ever made even though it’s illogical to think so, I’ve never had a girlfriend, I find it hard to trust others, and my only escape is fantasies I indulge in while I’m alone.

9Mental filter

My boyfriend immigrated here when he was 5. His family is very involved in their native culture/church and he is not. Due to them previously needing financial help and therefore him being in debt, he is unable to move out for another 1-2 years. They strongly prefer he be with someone from their culture and would constantly pressure him about it. Throughout our relationship they would tell him he should leave and try to set him up with other people (sometimes while I was standing there in their native language).

2No Distortion

Hey, so I recently admitted to my partner that I helped my friend with assisted suicide when I was 9 years old. For 11 years I didn’t tell anyone, not even my parents. No one knew what happened except me. I’m just trying to figure out if It was the right thing to do. I need help learning if I am evil for what I did or not. He was sexually abused by his father at a very young age, in very poor housing with no mother, Schizophrenic, and smiling when I helped him. After all these years of brooding and holding in the secret I’ve become jaded and unknowing of what’s moral and immoral anymore. I know I have PTSD from it because of all the hallucinations and nightmares. Can you help me determine if what I did was the right thing to do? I killed someone when I was 9 years old, how to I learn morality again?

I’m just trying to figure out if It was the right thing to do. I need help learning if I am evil for what I did or not. After all these years of brooding and holding in the secret I’ve become jaded and unknowing of what’s moral and immoral anymore. Can you help me determine if what I did was the right thing to do?

0All-or-nothing thinking

I feel I’ll never be in a relationship. I’m 23 and never have. There’s nothing wrong with me from the outside looking, in fact, I always have admirers and guys who ask me out. I’m funny, nice and quite good looking. However, I have a super hard time developing feelings for guys, and the few ones I really fall for never ever like me back, which makes me feel like a failure. I’ve been on many dates with great guys who were serious and were looking for a relationship, and in the beginning when a handsome guy gives me attention I feel thrilled about it and even fantasize about us getting together, but as soon as he actually tells me he likes me or starts showing physical affection, the world turns upside down, and no matter how attracted I was to him, I start feeling sick, and feel like I’m in a parallel universe because a good guy liking me is not supposed to happen in real life, just in my fantasies. It’s like a thousand voices in my head start screaming at me how I don’t deserve it and how life is playing me an evil trick and if I fall for it, something horribly painful will happen and I will make a fool out of myself. I don’t even know how to word or interpret these feelings, but they take over me completely and I get confused, sad and repellant towards the guy. It always ends up with me running away, not looking back. I’m always the one to break things up, no guy has ever really rejected me, and yet being rejected scares me so much my subconscious seems to drive me to “leave before I get left” as Taylor Swift puts it… So basically, when it’s clear that a guy likes me back, I lose my feelings for him and get super uncomfortable instead. When I date more “douchy” kind of guys, I feel safe, like things are the way they should, but then I also get annoyed by their behavior and keep thinking that I deserve someone better. I’m so sad, lonely and confused, and I feel like something is wrong with me and I should be ashamed that I can’t find a boyfriend. I’m also a super jealous person, I’m jealous of my friends who are in relationships, I feel like I can never have that, despite all the guys who want it with me. (From Europe)

When I date more “douchy” kind of guys, I feel safe, like things are the way they should, but then I also get annoyed by their behavior and keep thinking that I deserve someone better. I’m so sad, lonely and confused, and I feel like something is wrong with me and I should be ashamed that I can’t find a boyfriend.

6Should statements

From a teen boy in the U.S.: for a long time now i have felt empty and bored with life, i have had no ambition or motivation to do anything, i always see how people have dreams and aspirations but i have no desire for anything, not even money can buy me happiness. i have one friend that im not allowed to hang out with.

for a long time now i have felt empty and bored with life, i have had no ambition or motivation to do anything, i always see how people have dreams and aspirations but i have no desire for anything, not even money can buy me happiness.

7Overgeneralization

From Israel: Recently I noticed how many of the things I do are done to get appreciation from people around me. I daydream about putting a good status on Whatsapp so that some specific girls will see it and think “He is funny” (I avoid acting on this). I dream of saying smart or funny or sharp things just on the right time. I keep helping people on a big Facebook group of help, and wait for the people to thank me, or just know that others that see it know how smart I am and how funny and helpful. When I talk to people and they laugh, this is what makes me happy. It’s like all the things I do are done to be appreciated. It’s an addiction. Some of my life decisions were based on the will to be seen by people in a good way. My happiness depends on the approval of others!!! Even writing this question is for you to think how smart I am, and think of my poor situation. Can you give me self help ideas and book names to get out of this, and start discovering and doing what I WANT to do? Thank you very much.

When I talk to people and they laugh, this is what makes me happy.

1Emotional Reasoning

Growing up, I never thought I would be in a long term relationship. I thought maybe I’d have some boyfriends, but nothing serious, I never wanted to get married, have kids, etc. I think part of it was how I was raised- my parents never wanted me to depend on a man, and my mom was a pretty staunch feminist who discouraged me getting involved with boys. Even as I got older, she frequently disapproved of my relationships. But more than that they stressed that I should take care of myself and put me first. It’s helped me be independent and goal-oriented, but sometimes I wonder if it’s also made me a bit selfish and unsuitable for relationships.

It’s helped me be independent and goal-oriented, but sometimes I wonder if it’s also made me a bit selfish and unsuitable for relationships.

10Labeling

From the U.S.: For about 7 years now I can barely get through a conversation without crying. It’s humiliating and is uncomfortable for everyone involved. Anything can trigger it but I seem to have narrowed it down to three general triggers. All of these triggers are things that I normally would never give a second thought let alone burst into tears about. 1) Any large group activity – baseball games, choir performances, kids school performances. If a group is together and I’m part of it, at some point I cry. 2) When anyone shares anything the least bit sentimental. For example – a friend of mine was talking about her son’s kindergarten graduation. His teacher taught the kids the sign language sign for “I love you” so that the next year that would be their secret signal around the school. Cute right? Cute. She was telling me this and I burst into tears! To the point I couldn’t speak. This happens all the time. 3) Anytime I have to speak about anything spiritual. I’ve almost stopped going to church. I can’t talk about any of it – not even planning a simple kids activity without crying at some point.

2No Distortion

From the U.S.: I am a 14 year old, I barely have any friends only one I’m remotely close to. Mostly I make online friends and for some reason I get intense fear and anxiety when one of them gets angry at me or something I say doesn’t settle well with them. I’d go far as to start bawling and self-harm till I bleed a little before I feel less guilty, like a self-punishment of some sort.

Mostly I make online friends and for some reason I get intense fear and anxiety when one of them gets angry at me or something I say doesn’t settle well with them. I’d go far as to start bawling and self-harm till I bleed a little before I feel less guilty, like a self-punishment of some sort.

3Magnification

From the U.S.: I am 14 and I am in my first year of high school, so school is not very stressful for me at this time. I despise my parents very much and do not agree with them on anything morally. I don’t have any friends because I have been told that my personality is very hard to like. I have fake through and made some fake acquaintences in classes like science or p.e. in middle school I was bullied a lot and was called ugly, fat, and similar thing and have been told to kill myself almost every day in middle school. (Sorry for the kinda long background)

I have fake through and made some fake acquaintences in classes like science or p.e. in middle school I was bullied a lot and was called ugly, fat, and similar thing and have been told to kill myself almost every day in middle school.

10Labeling

I am a female, and I have been having an ongoing affair for the past 10 years. I am married, he is married. We met about 12 years ago. I would have ended up with him had I not gotten pregnant with my son. I had left my husband for him, but then after finding out I was pregnant, went back to my husband. My question now is that since we are both miserable, we want to leave our spouses, we know what we are doing is wrong, but there are children involved same ages 2 boys 7 and 2 girls 5. I have tried to tell my husband that I am unhappy but he won’t hear it and thinks we can make it over this so called “hump”…we have done counseling together and separately. My husband is very co-dependent, I am not. I just don’t know how to do this and it is consuming my life and starting to drive me crazy!! Any advice will be greatly appreciated!

I just don’t know how to do this and it is consuming my life and starting to drive me crazy!!

3Magnification

I had a highly traumatic childhood of emotional abuse, smothering, and neglect at the hands of a substance-abusing parent. I was also molested through my diaper by older children as a toddler. I believe these led to the development of my severe, chronic dissociate disorder and OCD. I say all this for context, not as an excuse. As a kid, I had horrible violent and sexually deviant intrusive thoughts as well as PGAD in conjunction with them. I hated them and wanted nothing to do with them and tried to suppress them, but was convinced I was evil. Therapy has helped me realize they weren’t my fault back then. However, as a teen, I decided those thoughts were inevitable and began to let awful scenarios play out in my head instead of rejecting them and masturbated to some of them. I found online communities of people who shared these thoughts but considered them harmless “kinks” when explored only through fiction. I never intended to act on any of them and considered them divorced from my true opinions, but now I see they were still affecting me and I want nothing to do with them. I don’t believe an immoral fantasy can be harmless anymore. I became hyper-sexual and a chronic masturbator. My twin cousins who are 7 years younger than me slept in my room when they visited my house. I was around 15-17. When I knew they had fallen asleep, I silently masturbated. It happened a couple times. I think they were asleep and I don’t think they knew, but it haunts me everyday and the remorse and self-disgust I feel is indescribable. It had nothing to do with their presence, I just wanted to orgasm, but it was SO irresponsible of me no matter how careful I was. In the only other instance of this, I once compulsively touched myself through my pants in an upstairs room of their house, only for a sec, planning to stop before anyone entered. One of them walked in unexpectedly and I was mortified, but pretended I just had an itch, apologized, and went to wash my hands. I don’t know if I can tell my therapist, but it’s eating me alive. I don’t know if these instances count legally as indecency to a minor. If so, I’m ready to turn myself in. I want to kill myself.

I don’t know if I can tell my therapist, but it’s eating me alive. I don’t know if these instances count legally as indecency to a minor.

3Magnification

I really prefer to be alone. I hate trying to keep up with friends, and I don’t like putting an effort into making them, or finding things in common with other people. I typically don’t connect with people, and I don’t want to. I don’t dislike people, or feel like they are not good enough to be my friend, nor am I concerned that I am not good enough to be theirs. I just really enjoy being alone.

2No Distortion

From the U.S. My brother’s son turns 2 in April, and they live in Denver. The boy’s mother left them for a 3 month stay in California right after he turned 1 to “work on herself”; before returning to Denver when she felt like she was ready to be a mother again. She has recently left them again, this time she has said she has little interest in returning to Denver.

2No Distortion

From Denmark: Hi I’m a 15 year old boy. I think I’m getting/having a depression. My dad suffers from depression, my sister from anorexia and my mom sometimes cries a lot because of all the bad things that has happened. I took a depression test on the web and it said I had extremely high score on Cyclothymia and I have all the symptoms from it. I don’t know what to do. I dont know how to tell my parents. They have already been through soo much and are still not good and my sister refuses to get help and she’s 18 now so my parrents can’t force her. I always keep my emotions in and I realize now that I really can’t get them out. I can’t cry no matter how much I try and I haven’t cried for a year or so not even from pain — 2 months ago I got a big piece of glass all the way through my finger and it got stuck. After I got it pulled out at the hospital I had a huge hole but I didnt cry even though it hurt like hell

I always keep my emotions in and I realize now that I really can’t get them out. I can’t cry no matter how much I try and I haven’t cried for a year or so not even from pain — 2 months ago I got a big piece of glass all the way through my finger and it got stuck. After I got it pulled out at the hospital I had a huge hole but I didnt cry even though it hurt like hell

5Personalization

From a teen in the U.K.: Lately, I’ve been experiencing some kind of change around me. I’ve been losing emotions to everything. I know I can feel because I do cry etc, it’s just that hobbies, people, as well as places that made me feel a certain way, are starting to not make me react at all. I’m an introvert person and I don’t like speaking to people about my problems. I’ve also been lacking a lot of sleep for the last couple of months, sleeping 1-4 hours a night, most of the time 2 hours… could it be something to do with my mental health?

I’ve been losing emotions to everything.

7Overgeneralization

This issue has been going on since I began dating in late high school. I have a very difficult time staying attracted to women I date. Most all of them would be considered attractive. I don’t want to come off as shallow because I definitely am not. I would enjoy a long relationship however the problem is that around 4-8 weeks of dating I completely loose interest in the girl, even if there are no major issues with her.

I have a very difficult time staying attracted to women I date. Most all of them would be considered attractive. I don’t want to come off as shallow because I definitely am not.

10Labeling

How can I tell if I have depression or if I’m just a moody teenager? I’ve taken many online surveys before, including the SanityScore one, and they all say I have “Severe Depression” but I’m still skeptical. I have extreme mood swings, I feel hopeless and worthless sometimes, I feel like I can’t control anything in my life, but then sometimes I think I’m just overreacting. I think that there are people who have it worse than I do, and that I should just stop thinking about it. I sort of want to bring the idea up to my mom, but I don’t want her to judge me. I wrote a letter to her but I haven’t given it to her yet. Do you have any advice?

I sort of want to bring the idea up to my mom, but I don’t want her to judge me.

4Fortune-telling

Hello, I think I may have schizophrenia or something similar. I hear voices and other noises and I see things that aren’t there. I have little to no motivation to do things and I feel depressed a lot. I used to think I had depression but now I’m not so sure. I also have disorganised speech and thoughts and I usually can’t stay focused on anything. Sometimes when speaking, I say things that do not make sense and it confuses other people. Also when people speak to me I sometimes can’t understand them even if I can hear them perfectly. I have a hard time expressing myself with words and that also confuses people when I try to explain. I also have trouble understanding my emotions and usually I don’t really feel emotions. Other say I’m cold and unresponsive because I don’t know how to react to most situations so I just don’t. I lack empathy and I don’t have very many close relationships and I really don’t want any. This is interfering with my daily life and I am going to see a doctor soon but I would like to know if I’m on the right track or if there may be something else going on before I go in to the doctor so I don’t waste anyone’s time. Thank you so much. Have a great day.

I lack empathy and I don’t have very many close relationships and I really don’t want any.

7Overgeneralization

From a teen in the U.S.: As of late I’ve noticed some startling changes in myself. I’ve always been a clear minded person, one who wasn’t easily distracted, and I’ve always had a good memory of things. As of recently (the last few months), I’ve been stuck in a mental fog. I can’t think clearly, or understand simple concepts anymore. I feel as though there’s a wall blocking me from mentally going past it, and trying to get past it only makes the confusion and fogginess worse. I can’t remember things I used to remember– like important events or things that were told to me minutes beforehand. My mood is here and there, one moment I’m okay and the next I’m angry and irritable.

My mood is here and there, one moment I’m okay and the next I’m angry and irritable.

0All-or-nothing thinking

From the U.S.: My divorced parents are using me to get information about each other to use in their child support trial. I thought I could confide in my grandmother for support, but she ended up telling my mom everything I said and now my mom is using that information to use against my father in court.

2No Distortion

From a teen in Canada: When I was younger, my mom and I used to get along great. I don’t mean just the regular every little girl gets along with her mom. She’d always be on my side whenever my dad would yell at me unfairly, and she was always the first to defend me. And when I got diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome when I was twelve, she was so supportive.

2No Distortion

From the U.S.: My girlfriend and I have been in a rocky two-year relationship. She is amazing and my best friend. We are engaged now. We have many external stressors (my med school, her being in a city she hates, money), but also both have respective insecurities, anxiety, depression, and trust issues. I’ve come to realize that many of the problems I bring to the relationship are tied to insecurities and low self esteem. Thus, I tend to use her as a litmus test for my self-worth.

2No Distortion

I have severe generalized anxiety and treatment resistant major depressive disorder. I am prescribed medication by my family doctor, whom I see once every two months. During my last prescription renewal, I asked him if there are any other treatments or medications that I haven’t yet tried, and his answer was very confusing. He said, “Psychiatry hasn’t changed. The only treatment I know of that works [for depression] is to have a full life, be active socially, work full time, get plenty of exercise, and get up at 6:30am every day.” I asked him, “How do you do that with anxiety and problems, and chronic trouble sleeping?” He responded, “All at the same time, I guess.”

2No Distortion

My boyfriend and I have been living together for almost a year. I know that he is the man that I am going to spend my life with and I have no doubts about that. We live in his home with his parents and because they are not working we completely support them and pay for everything. His mom has a multitude of health issues and is in her 50s she hasn’t worked in over 20 years. His dad is 46 and stopped working after hurting his knee at work when my boyfriend was 18. Since then my boyfriend has been supporting them completely. My boyfriend is a caring and loving man and his parents take advantage of him. They are not appreciative and always expect him to provide them with whatever they want—his dad in particular. At first when I moved in things were okay but recently it has been very hard. His parents both smoke in the house and no matter how many times we talk to them about it, it continues. They are constantly in our business and wanting us to run and get them things. Recently his dad came into a decent amount of money and with that money he was supposed to buy a vehicle, he did not. Instead his dad takes my car almost everyday and is gone until it’s time for me to go to work which just leaves me sitting at home. I want so badly to move out and have our own place just me and my boyfriend. But we cannot afford to pay for our own place and a place for his parents. My boyfriend is completely unwilling to wean his parents off of his support and I fear that we are going to be stuck living in the same home with them forever. We are only 25 and it feels like we are never going to have the chance to have our own family. I get so angry because his father is mostly just lazy and unwilling to work and would rather just have his son take care of him forever. He has the attitude of an unable elderly man when in actuality he is younger than my parents who both work. My dad had the same knee injury as him and got it fixed then went back to work. He didn’t forever stay “disabled” and expect me to take care of him. It’s beginning to feel impossible living with them and I am so depressed and discouraged. I sit in my room all day long and avoid his parents because I feel uncomfortable and when I hear them complaining it makes me angry. Am I crazy for thinking we deserve a life of our own? And am I selfish for thinking that if we just moved his parents would figure it out? They aren’t children, they’re adults and I’m getting really tired of caring for them like children and everyone I bring this up to my boyfriend he makes excuses for them and dismisses my feelings and just says he’s sorry but that’s just how it is. I can’t take it anymore. I need advice. Please. Thank you.

2No Distortion

I am a 30 (one child, once divorced) year old woman, have been seeing a 42 year old man (never married no kids) for about 5 months. For the most part our relationship is good, but he won’t stop bringing up my sexual past and asking seriously intrusive questions. He wants to know every single personal detail and exact numbers, all the way back to high school! I’ve told him Im uncomfortable talking about it and I think its unhealthy, since it is irrelevant now, but he just gets angry and emotional. He has some perfectionism issues and claims that he’s avoided one night stands his whole life in order to be the “perfect” partner to someone someday and wishes i would’ve done the same. He says this is my punishment, having to admit the things I’ve done and be ashamed. Im so confused I don’t know how to handle these inquisitions every month. or so. Im ready to leave if this doesn’t stop but I wish I knew how to make this stop. Or SHOULD I feel guilty for my past?! HELP PLEASE!

2No Distortion

From a teen in Ireland: My father, somewhat a former drunkard, beat my little brother and my older sister (and my mother) – but I strangely can’t recall him beating me. I am gay and I am quite certain my sister and I have developed BPD thanks to him, but that is not the problem. I don’t speak to my father, though we live under the same roof. He speaks more to my other siblings.

2No Distortion