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danthareja

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cognitive-distortion

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I have been having therapy for nearly 4 years, for childhood trauma and general, in the beginning things were fine, she asked all the right questions, but know I feel like things are very intense, she knows i find friendships complicated so she’ asked if we were friends, and 2 weeks ago I started sitting on the floor for comfort, then she joined me but sitting opposite but shoes off, but I found the way she sat across from me a bit uncomfortable, she had her legs open, we spoke about my feelings and how I felt that day and she said she would give her heart feelings to me. I don’t know maybe I am reading too much into it or just feeling to emotionally sensitive I told my sister and she said my therapist has feelings for me and I should change.

I have been having therapy for nearly 4 years, for childhood trauma and general, in the beginning things were fine, she asked all the right questions, but know I feel like things are very intense, she knows i find friendships complicated so she’ asked if we were friends, and 2 weeks ago I started sitting on the floor for comfort, then she joined me but sitting opposite but shoes off, but I found the way she sat across from me a bit uncomfortable, she had her legs open, we spoke about my feelings and how I felt that day and she said she would give her heart feelings to me.

10Labeling

I met a woman online in Norway, we emailed for 4 months, our emails became intimate, she ended up flying to Florida to be with me for 17 days. On the 4th day, she told me she had no feelings for me, then a day later she said she wanted to be alone, I left her at her hotel and went home, an hour later she called and I went back to see her, she apologized and said it was her, she felt far from home, she did try to change her flight but couldn’t. The next day she said she thinks she’s falling in love with me. The next 13 days until she left for home, everything was great, she made me feel like she did fall in love with me. Sex was great, we were very intimate, she told me many things, made me feel she would return soon and be with me.

2No Distortion

I recently became engaged and I am now living with my fiance. Before I moved in with him, his mother had a key to his apartment because she works around the corner from us and she likes to have lunch at our apartment. I didn’t mind her having a key to our apartment at first, but now she is letting herself in unannounced on a daily basis. I have a problem with this because I consider myself to be a private person and last week she keyed into our apartment when I was in the shower (we currently do not have a lock on the bathroom door). Also, my fiance works the overnight shift so he sleeps during the day. I have tried to be quiet while he sleeps. I am a full-time student and I usually work on my assignments quietly during the day. When his mother keys into our apartment during the day, she is rather loud and opens the door to our bedroom to check in on her son (who by the way is almost 30). My fiance is close with his mother and I don’t know how to tell him I am uncomfortable with this situation without offending him and his mother. His mother has been known to hold grudges and I don’t want to get on her bad side before I marry her son. Please help! This is driving me nuts! Thanks.

My fiance is close with his mother and I don’t know how to tell him I am uncomfortable with this situation without offending him and his mother. His mother has been known to hold grudges and I don’t want to get on her bad side before I marry her son

8Mind Reading

I am extremely observant of people as I had high intellect but a very low understanding of people’s motivators. I ended up being able to charm just about anyone, being able to understand people’s states and inner beliefs almost at a glance, and feeling terribly weary and disillusioned for it. I often find myself exasperated “are you really that dumb?” “Where’s your ability to judge your own situation?” “So slow. People’s internal actions and reactions are so dull, slow, foolish, and I cannot say anything because they won’t be able to understand my words, and I know exactly why. It seems to me that people are often walking happily to their own emotional and personal demise and they will not listen to me, they are convinced that how they ‘feel they are entitled to act’ is the ultimate truth. I often feel like I am surrounded by sleepwalkers. The worst feeling in life is to be able to manipulate someone so easily and see them react exactly as you expected they would, as though they are machines devoid of sense and independent thought. It is the worst feeling because those little tricks I play out of boredom prove again and again that I am right. Who the hell wants to be right about something like this!!!?? I am right about enough already, ever since kindergarten!! I don’t need to be right about despair!!! I am extremely intellectual but I would still enjoy ‘human contact’ right? Although since humans are what I understand them to be, I may as well be an alien. *Laughs bleakly* (From New Zealand)

People’s internal actions and reactions are so dull, slow, foolish, and I cannot say anything because they won’t be able to understand my words, and I know exactly why.

10Labeling

From a 16 year old in Turkey: Over the past year, I was brave enough to openly admit that I only had been following the religion of my society because my family is strictly religious and simply it is more convenient to smile and nod. This admittance, to my surprise, turned into a crisis. I was almost kicked out of my conservative school, some teacher would talk about “a stupid girl who was affected by this and that” during his lesson to another class, my classmates wouldn’t talk to me for a while and claim that I was corrupting them, their parents would badmouth me at every chance, lies spread, my mother says that she’s ashamed to go out in public, that I’ve shattered her trust, that I was stupid enough to get influenced by people, etc.

2No Distortion

I’m a student receiving my Masters degree. Within the past two years I’ve felt my body and mind change significantly in many ways. I feel extremely anxious when doing tasks (even small ones like packing/unpacking a suitcase). This is the same with grocery shopping or attempting my homework. I then push everything aside and get nothing done. My habits of cleanliness such as my apartment have declined because I refuse to motivate myself to clean. I’ll find myself in the kitchen then in the bedroom for some reason the randomly in the bathroom, ultimately accomplishing nothing. I get distracted by TV a lot and it impedes my homework. I also feel pressured on what to do when I finish my masters and feel like I’m too lackadaisical to even search for jobs. My relationship with my boyfriend is also affected by this in that I’ll freak out on him, refuse sex, and find him at the mercy of which high or low I’ll be on. I’ll also find myself drinking and smoking cigarettes more often to avoid doing work or tasks. I feel like I have adult ADD due to these symptoms and have spoken with my mother, who revealed she believes she has it as well but was never properly diagnosed. I would like to know what to do and what would happen if I see a psychiatrist.

I feel extremely anxious when doing tasks (even small ones like packing/unpacking a suitcase).I then push everything aside and get nothing done. My habits of cleanliness such as my apartment have declined because I refuse to motivate myself to clean. I’ll find myself in the kitchen then in the bedroom for some reason the randomly in the bathroom, ultimately accomplishing nothing.I also feel pressured on what to do when I finish my masters and feel like I’m too lackadaisical to even search for jobs.

0All-or-nothing thinking

From the U.S.: I did this all the time as a kid, talk to myself like someone was there. Not like talking with myself to solve problems but just like normal friends having a conversation. It will be a completely animated conversation about anything good and disturbing. And I’l look right where I think whoever I’m talking to (someone made up or sometimes famous or whoever) is standing there. I know it’s not real or reality but the fantasy of pretending is nice. I function at work and home fine but I do this everywhere ,work, home, out, everywhere. I used to think its normal but now in not so sure.

I used to think its normal but now in not so sure.

10Labeling

I have Stage 3 Cancer that is in remission now. I have gained back all the weight that I had lost during Interferon Therapy. I feel alone in my life. I don’t know what to do with myself. I still work but that is all there is. My wife and I get along but there is no emotional closeness between us. She goes out on the weekends with her girlfriends and I stay home. I have no close friends, I am over weight and lack confidence in myself. Nothing excites me, Nothing to look forward to.

I have gained back all the weight that I had lost during Interferon Therapy. I feel alone in my life. I don’t know what to do with myself. I still work but that is all there is. My wife and I get along but there is no emotional closeness between us. She goes out on the weekends with her girlfriends and I stay home. I have no close friends, I am over weight and lack confidence in myself. Nothing excites me, Nothing to look forward to.

9Mental filter

Hi .I am a 17 year old girl living in hong kong. I felt extremely stressful last year so i visited a psychologist(the kind of doctor who give medicine to those who suffer from mental illnesses )i was diagnosed with adjustment disorder. i am on medication and recently i felt better (eg i have less headache) but i suspect myself of having “dependence personality disorder”. I am so helpless that i think i can never get rid of these feelings. I searched in wikipedia about these this disorder it mentions dependent personality disorder is inter-related with adjustment disorder.i found that i feel trouble in decision making , i always allow other people to decide/choices for me ,like letting my mom to decide which school and college for me to go , which subject for me to study.starting from primary school i always lean on one friend(i cannot stand without friend), i will feel anxious and helpless when i was alone. i cant say no or have courage to be alone because i need to lean on others. i dont know what to do with my life now. i cant make any important decisions in my life …beside, i still live with my mom, she likes to decide and define my life for me ,i cannot get rid of her too, i am kind of lean on the decisions she made for me.

i found that i feel trouble in decision making , i always allow other people to decide/choices for me ,like letting my mom to decide which school and college for me to go , which subject for me to study.starting from primary school i always lean on one friend(i cannot stand without friend), i will feel anxious and helpless when i was alone.

7Overgeneralization

I think scary thoughts sometime, it’s been happening since i was a kid and ever since i had my daughter it’s been worse. I see a dirty napkin and my mind forces me to think of me eating it, i won’t use dishes or even walk in my own kitchen. I think bad sexual thoughts, but what bothers me the most is that i can’t fall asleep because i make a popping sound with my lips over and over. When i was younger i prayed for 2 years straight because i was scared i didn’t believe in god. When i was younger i would wash my hands so much my skin would fall off, then my mom told me i need germs to be healthy and i stopped washing my hands at all. I think it could be ocd but i don’t know. I worry about every little thing and i feel so depressed because of things that haven’t even happened. But it’s so bad at night because of the need i have to make my lips make a popping noise over and over before i fall asleep. I can’t control it or stop it. I get nail clippers and clip all skin around my fingers and toes off, some parts so much that it bleeds. I get days where I’m so jittery and i feel almost like I’m not really here or like I’m about to die or something is off. I want to talk to someone for help, but nobody understands. When i was younger the problems were so much worse, but ever since i became postpartum they are starting to bother me again. Some things i don’t even want to type anonymously because they are so gross. I just want to be happy but i feel like it’s impossible

I worry about every little thing and i feel so depressed because of things that haven’t even happened.

9Mental filter

From the U.S.: Some information one may need to fully assess this question is the girl in question was about 10-11 years old and the boy was about 11-12 years old. Basically the boy sibling demonstrated aggressive behavior in the household from hitting to throwing objects and the girl witnessed it. I learned in psychology that one can learn aggressive behaviors from an adult when young. I was wondering if the girl, now about 12 years old, is now showing aggressive behaviors did she learn it from her sibling? Can she be fully conscious that their actions are wrong, knowing she understands right from wrong fully, and be able to change her behavior? Or can one FULLY attribute her behavior to the behavior of the sibling and the way she was conditioned to aggression or does the she hold some accountability of their actions, based off that she understands right from wrong and does behave well in other settings?

I was wondering if the girl, now about 12 years old, is now showing aggressive behaviors did she learn it from her sibling?

7Overgeneralization

Hello, I’m currently a 14 year old girl (turning 15 in May) and I am soon going to finish my second year at the same school. I had been living elsewhere with a completely different lifestyle. Due to financial issues I had been forced to move to my hometown with my family but without my father. During my first year here I had been severely depressed. At times I was highly tempted to cut my arms or simply climb up to the roof and jump but luckily I refused to do either. During this time I refused to speak to anyone and I had noticeably started spending more time with my online ‘friends’. This continued on for several months and when school had started it seemingly got worse. I had made one friend during my first year, and if it hadn’t been for the fact that she had also been in a somewhat similar situation I would have never spoken to her.

2No Distortion

I have recently been thinking and realized that I exhibit most sociopathic traits. I’m a liar, I steal money occasionally, and I lack guilt. I can’t feel remorse or guilt for anything I do. I never feel REAL attachments. I may have developed these traits due to my rough childhood. My father was absent for the past 8 years. He used to call and ask for money, in which my mother made me pick up and relay her messages. I felt like a helpless puppet, and I was angry that they didn’t care how I felt. My father was manipulative and was in general an evil person. I’m not like him completely. As I said, I can’t feel bad for others. I’ve watched VERY graphic, violent videos and feel nothing. I even laugh at the way the victims die. I get annoyed by people who bother me. I feel like shoving a pen into their idiotic eyeballs. I am impulsive and cannot think ahead. I rarely experience fear, and never distress (except pain). I (willingly) think of horrible things happening to people I love, and I don’t care. I’m only nice to people for what they can offer me. I see my brother and his girlfriend express affection for each other, and I can’t understand love. I used to be a really nice, caring, understanding kid. Now I’m impatient and & rude. I keep up the sociopathic mask so I don’t seem insane. I have dead eyes, and often make people uncomfortable with my stare. I recently took interest in a girl, and I liked her. After enough time, I broke her and her boyfriend up. I manipulated her, while maintaining a friendly smile . It almost worked, but things went South and they got back together. This heartbreak made me block out emotions (sound familiar). I’m not seeking help, because tbh I like my mindset. But I just want to know once and for all if I’m a sociopath. Thanks for reading!

I used to be a really nice, caring, understanding kid. Now I’m impatient and & rude.

10Labeling

My spouse and I have been living apart since day 1, living in different states. He battles issues of addiction, but seems to be fine with kicking the drug piece. Alcohol is still heavily involved. He moved away in with his sister 1,000 miles away to escape the problems faced here and restart his life. He eventually married me after 3 years of dating. He hasnt started a new career, couldnt get into the military, so I want him home. He is worried that moving back will bring back bad habbits, when I feel it was just escapism and more a bandaid verus getting to the issues as drinking is still an issue. He feels most comfortable with his sister, my job is stationary my career being 10 years strong with the federal government, I dont see the need to move when he only works in a bar (of all places) but doesnt fully support himself. I feel his mind races and he has coping issues and learning how to move stuff in the past. He had issues with his parents, being mixed race. Now I want him home, I know we have things to work on, but he is more terrified of facing the area where the issues with drugs were. He is up and down, agreed to move back but still having issues with facing the area and the people. His alcohol consumption is terrible, through the roof at least 5 drinks per day and sometimes can finish a gallon in as little as 2 days. I don’t know what to do, how to start dealing with this, I know he has to make the choice, but I don’t know what I can say. I am accused of not understanding, I ask why he flew back to marry me. But I can’t seem to separate him from his sister (who is in the military). There are a few issues yes, but I feel I can’t do much when my sleep is interrupted and I am 1,000 miles away. I’m dealing with his addiction, childish fear and not wanting to leave his old go to person and start our lives, I’m ready to throw in the towel but don’t want to leave.

I don’t know what to do, how to start dealing with this, I know he has to make the choice, but I don’t know what I can say. I am accused of not understanding, I ask why he flew back to marry me.

5Personalization

Hello. I have become very worried about my mental state in the past months. I feel as if I have been becoming more and more dissociated. It’s very hard to explain. My brain feels foggy, fuzzy, and sometimes absent. My frontal lobe, to be exact, feels disconnected to the rest of my brain/fuzzy/hazy/heavy. My vision feels strange, it almost feels as if I’m looking at life through thick glass. I have been having severe anxiety attacks, where I feel as if maybe I am not real or there is an alternate version of myself that has done very bad things. Sometimes I sleep very badly because my body feel extremely on edge and heavy. Sometimes it doesn’t feel as if i am doing something, like I will walk into a room and not remember the walk from one room to another. Sometimes i feel as if I am floating or my body is not exactly in reality. I have full body tingles, shaking feeling. Sometimes I feel like everything is happening so fast around me and i am not a part of it. Voices sometimes seem very far away and uncomprehensible. I am very very afraid as I learned today that my cousin is schizophrenic. I am 18 years old and I take 40mg of Prozac for depression and anxiety. Please, please give me some answers. I am very scared. I haven’t felt like myself in ages.

I feel as if I have been becoming more and more dissociated. It’s very hard to explain. My brain feels foggy, fuzzy, and sometimes absent. My frontal lobe, to be exact, feels disconnected to the rest of my brain/fuzzy/hazy/heavy.

1Emotional Reasoning

I am seventeen and I dated this guy for about six months. We were so happy together, and we always had a great time when were were hanging out. We then ended up breaking up because of a lie that was spread around. After we broke up, we settled everything and wanted to go back out with each other and when we tried, my mom would not let us. She hates him for some reason and will not even let me talk to him. I love him with all my heart, and he treated me so well but my mom will not allow us be together. I am no longer allowed to see him, talk to him or even make contact with him in school.

2No Distortion

I always had a problem growing up being slow and being put in small classes in school. I was told I have ADHD and that is why I am so slow. But my mom told me 2 days ago that im mentally challenged. I am not sure what that is or if I have that or what. But I do find it hard to wright read and do math well it takes me longer than most people my age. am a really mentally challenged??? how do i find out if i am becouse i am having a hard time believing my mom. but also my mom told me i got tested and that what the doctor told her – that i am Mentally challenged but what i wanna know is can i grow out of it if i am or was???

2No Distortion

Ever since I was a child (7 to 10 years)I would feel aroused when I see someone humiliated or slightly tortured, I would imagine myself being the one receiving getting humiliated. I began masturbating when I was about 10, I didn’t even know what was I doing, I didn’t even know anything about sex or had any sexual feelings. I would lay on my stomach and just sort of pressure myself against the floor and I would never use my hands or finger myself, it has been the same way ever since. I am 20 years old, and I never get turned on by anything rather than humiliation and torture such as whipping and stuff. I learned that it’s a sexual masochism disorder. However, this whole issue has been bothering me for so long, and I cannot just get convinced that I was born this way. The fact that I only feel aroused this way ever since I was a kid makes me mad, especially because it’s not even associated with sex. It’s not like imagining having sex in that kind of way, sex is never even a factor in this. Never. Sex and steamy scenes never make me feel anything. I even began thinking that maybe I was sexually assaulted or abused in general as a child. My parents were normal and good, though. But for example, as a child and a teenager and even now, I am depressed most of the time. I am also very reckless towards myself like in fifth grade I swallowed so many pills to die and it was for a stupid reason. I used to self-harm very deeply( not related to masochism), and there is so much other stuff. Lately, I have been trying to remember my childhood. We had a nanny for a few years when I was 6 or 7, I remember that I hated her so much, that I once held a knife and told her that I would kill myself if she didn’t stop bothering me. I don’t remember though what she used to do, I cannot even remember her face which is weird because I remember people and stuff from a stage much earlier than that in my life. I have also been bullied as a kid from my friends but not like physically or anything. I know it’s stupid but I desperately want an explanation. (From Egypt)

However, this whole issue has been bothering me for so long, and I cannot just get convinced that I was born this way.

3Magnification

From an adult in the U.K. Just before Xmas last year I wanted a one in one with my mother so as I could tell her of a Grandchild of 21 that she didn’t know of. I had a feeling this request would be ignored or dismissed by my mother so I got in contact with her closest friend of 40 years and told her of the situation and asked her to ring my mum and to try and arrange a one to one for me with her in the next month or so.

I had a feeling this request would be ignored or dismissed by my mother so I got in contact with her closest friend of 40 years and told her of the situation and asked her to ring my mum and to try and arrange a one to one for me with her in the next month or so.

8Mind Reading

From a 14 year old in Canada: Ever since I can remember I have had very detailed thoughts about sex, most of which involved me personally being harmed and/or shamed. I had dreams were I was violated while large groups of people stood around and watched. Dreams were I was tied up in a glass cage, naked and in public, while people gathered around. I’ve dreamt that I was tied down and tortured, being told that if I made the slightest noise they (the torturer, whose face was never seen) would start the methodical torture over again, until I could endure it without making noise. In these dreams the torture was very overtly sexual.

2No Distortion

I’ve been friends with a girl online for almost 10 years. She’s always struggled with depression, and has dropped out of middle school, then high school, then university. She’s 24 now. She just got a really good job, but then she almost immediately started deteriorating. I’m Bipolar II, and I suspect she is also Bipolar. She cycles rapidly between manic states and depression. She has repeatedly told me she is constantly thinking about suicide.

2No Distortion

My boyfriend and I have been seeing each other for just over a year now in an exclusive and loving relationship. We were once childhood sweethearts when we were 11 years old and lost touch mid teens only to reunite in May last year and instantly fell for each other. In the years we hadn’t been together he had dated a woman nearly 10 years older than him and she fell pregnant by accident – he was only 23. She made life unbearable for him during her pregnancy and broke it off with him. He kept the pregnancy a secret from his family and friends for months and came clean with his mother, with whom he has a good relationship, when the little girl was 6months old. The ex made it abundantly clear that she was prepared to let him be a part of their child’s life but as an arm’s length father. Or so the story goes.

2No Distortion

I have been with my girlfriend for 7 months and I love her dearly; but since we starting going out I have noticed a lot of jelousy and lack of faith toward our relationship. The other day my GF asked me that if my ex texted me, would I reply. I said that if I did reply it would only be out of politeness and to ask how she is. I also said that if my ex kept responding and asking more questions that I would respond by saying “Thanks for the txt but I don’t feel comfortable staying in communication as I have a girlfriend that I am madly in love with and feel any more txts would be inappropriate”. Take care” For the record, I would never initiate a conversation with any of my ex’s, but at the same time I’ve always been polite, which is something I really like about myself. My GF thinks that if I reply to her that I will end up back together with her. I am absolutely loyal to her and I tell her all the time that she is the only girl for me, and its the truth! She is willing to leave me over this issue. Am I wrong for thinking the way I do?

My GF thinks that if I reply to her that I will end up back together with her.

8Mind Reading

I’ve thought about killing. I’ve always wanted to beat some one until they were black and blue and bloody. I’ve wanted to taste blood from people. Ive never felt anything towards anyone except my dog. I’ve wanted to kill everyone but I’ve never done it. I mean it’s like I have a flip and I just thinking about psychotic things. I’ve thought if I was a psychopath or a sociopath. I mean I don’t care for people dying period. I’ve always wanted blood to be all over my body. Ive once sat in my bed laughing at the thought of beating someone up or killing. I’ve been wanting to destroy my room or destroy everything. I mean I just want to do everything destructive. I have depression, add, adhd, and bipolar. I have a short temper too. I’ve just wanted to kill and kill every day. I love hurting myself and blood rushing out. I laugh at the pain. I couldn’t tell my mom about this because obviously she would send me somewhere and I probably kill her if she did. I don’t know what to do right now honestly. My friends think I’m heartless. Anyways yea

I’ve been wanting to destroy my room or destroy everything. I mean I just want to do everything destructive.I couldn’t tell my mom about this because obviously she would send me somewhere and I probably kill her if she did.

1Emotional Reasoning