The Liverpool Standard and General Commercial Advertiser.
Liverpool, Merseyside, England, 1854-01-17 00:00:00

A 3fATRI3SONIAL HOAX.

IT is a wonder with many persons whether matrimonial
advertisements ever bring forth a genuine reply. Swindling
is so often successful, and so many of the fair sex. are sa
confiding and foolish, that we have no doubt instances do,
sometimes occur. But in the vast majority of cases the
advertisers are very properly subjected to jokes more prac-
tical than pleasant. In the Mercury, of the 30th ultimo,
appeared a matrimonial advertisement signed " Hermit,"
which set off the amiability and attractions of the adver-
tiser in the usual way. This was replied to by some wags
living in the neighbourhood of Abercromby-square, and a
correspondence ensued, which we subjoin

- "Jan. 4, 1854-
" Sin, —From your advertisement I think you a person
of honour, and one who will not esteem a lady the less for
answering it. I do so from being prevented going biro
society by attending an invalid parent ; and having na.,
brother nor sister, and Pa being dead some years, leaving
some little property in land and in the funds, divided
thus :—Part at my own disposal, bringing me in £5O per
annum ; and Ma's gives her £lOO a year, which will be.
mine at her death, besides some little expectations from a
batchelor uncle, rector of a place near Gravesend. Being
respectably connected, I should like to form a connexion
equally so. If the age of 30 is not an objection, you will
hare the kindness to address ' Miss Slow, Brownlow-hill„.
till called for.'—Yours, &c. A. SLOW.
"P.S.—Of course you can give proper reference, and
will send this week."

"8, Leicester-buildings, King-street, Liverpool,
January, 4, 1854.
" MiD.131,-I have the honour to be in receipt of your
esteemed mark of confidence.

" You correctly estimate my integrity of purpose, to cor—
roborate which, I hesitate not to address this from my owun
office.

" I admire rather than condemn you for your candid re-
ply to my advertisement—thus, for awhile, evading the
trammels with which custom, not necessity, has fettered a.
natural impulse.
"In position, education, character, and connexions, I
shall at least be found worthy your esteem—which will
certainly be a step in the right direction.
" Without affecting to be wholly independent of, or indif-
ferent to, pecuniary considerations, yet I deem it of
secondary import in contrast with the enduring happiness
which proceeds from true affection, and tranquillity of
disposition. •-
" I have been honoured by many letters. Yours is one
of the few in which I imagine I can read a trace of cha-
racter, and have a consequent desire for an interview,
during which my conduct will be sincere and frank—your
communications confined to my own heart ; in short, my
deportment (whatever the issue of the interview as to the
future) that of a gentleman.
_ _ _

" I reside in the suburbs, and have an amiable daughter,
17 years of age, with three younger ones : they need a
mamma, and I a domestic companion to make life's
home happy.
" I shall be truly happy to obey your bidding for au
early interview, when and where you please ; and, thus far,
can only subscribe myself, with the most profound. respect,
as far as surmise may go respecting one I never saw,—
Faithfully, " D.
" Miss Slow.
" I subscribe with my initial letter, and please address
to me—" D, 8, Leicester-buildings, King-street."

" 6th January, 1854.
" Srs.,—l duly received your favour, the tone of which
has impressed me favourably, and with sincere hope that
it will not cause me ever to regret this step, to me, a very
important one, relying implicitly on yonr honour as a
gentleman, I will name a time and place of meeting, truly
trusting it may conduce to our mutual happiness. You
will have the kindness to let me know if it will be agree-
able to you to meet, as it will be more convenient to me,
in the first instance, on Brownlow-hill, Chatham-street
corner, near Lightbound's bread-shop, when we can have
a walk and converse on the subject ; say at half-past two,
or between that and three o'clock on Monday afternoon_
You will see a lady of middle height, rather slight, in a
figured black silk gown and black velvet mantle, and a
black velvet bonnet, with a blue veil, having 'a white
handkerchief and a lady's fancy basket in her right hand,
who will expect to see a gentleman holding a white hand-
kerchief in his left hand, about the time and place named.
You will, perhaps, have the goodness to name any other
particulars you may wish to adopt to intimate your pre-
sence. Whatever the end, may your happiness be undi-
minished is the desire of yours, most respectfully
' A. AOW.
" P.S.—Please to direct as before, Brownlow-hill."

"Jarman, 854.
" 8, Leicester-buildings, Kingstreet,
" Saturday, two p.m.

"MADAM,—I lose no moment in expressing my sense-
of this your proposed mark of confidence in my honour,
which appears almost too sincere and perfect to make it
requisite that I again reiterate my utter inability to do
or say aught that can excite a painful emotion. lam so
fully impressed with the import of this step (perchance
for weal or woe,) that the present will be tempered by a
full and weighty consideration of the future ; nay, I will
even add that if any seeming obstacle to your future
weal from such a union should be apparent to me, and
not so immediately evident to your less experienced career,
I should not shrink from the duty of placing it for your
consideration, and not seek to cultivate my own weal by
the slightest encroachment on yours. In short, unless it
is dearly evident to both that an alliance would enhance
our mutual happiness, I would, at whatever sacrifice of
a feeling, which I trust may arise, say honestly—let our
acquaintance, begun in mutual confidence, end in regret
mitigated by profound esteem.
" I am a disciple of a doctrine which says there are
ever inward or soul promptings in the proper path, and
indications as certain of unwise steps. This monitor
somehow induces me to augur the best from our interview,
and to be, of course, proportionably anxious for it. My
correspondence has been numerous, but in only one other
instance has it excited much of a feeling of anxiety in
solicitude for a result. I trust yours, the first interview
with anyone, mayobviatealloccasion ordesire for any other.
" I will be punctual at the time and place, and shall
trust a little to instinct to find you. I will dress in an
entirely brown suit, with a black velvet collar to coat,
and, if very cold or rough, a brown " Vienna" overcoat,
with velvet cuffs and collar, and cane or umbrella.* In
person moderately stout and tall ; as for the face, I shall
only say it is, at least, an honest and open one, ich will
invite your scrutiny, and be resigned at your verdict.

Spite of this truth, in erring reason's spite,
He can't be wrong whose heart is in the right.'

God speed the right.—l am in esteem and great r‘espeet,
faithfully, D."
* I will carry your note in my hand.

" Jan. 8, 1851—Five o'clock. p.m.
" Kum Umnrowx,—Since posting my reply, it has
occurred to me the possibility, not probability of anything
intervening to prevent your being as proposed ; in which
case, pray relieve suspense by an early explanation, and
an amended proposal.

" I also should tell you that you will probably see ano-
ther advertisement of mine in first page of this week's
Mercury, touching which you have a right to ask ex-
planation ; at all events, I am privileged with an oppor-
tunity of giving it, and avail myself of it, viz : I got nil
replies until Wednesday evening, and among them was
letter which, like your own (the one to which I allude,)
bore evidence of education. feeling,
offering an interview on Tuesdqy last.
Now, of
honour and
could not attend that proposal, yet felt in ,_,_ to
withal a latent ("mire
gentility bound to apologise, and
ress) adopted
see the writer ; and thus (as she gave no add
rtis; went, of an ex-
the only alternative left me, per
planation. As yet I have no reply,flaous
and undesired.
of
your interview may make it super . and timid
cocaunrsdoel
escription in advertisement,
Pray don't forget my self
nch of a juvenile bearing;
viz., age, and anticipate ta°,,,iii, tb a big true heart, in a
but you will, however, in
t
ornamental, but still worthy the
fraeemework, perchance more truly
unmistakeable brown
f• ihful, affectionate, virtuous
confidence of a al
care and if D.),
woman.—Adieu,
useful good aanndd substantial
ae
the hour of appointment arrived, and
Big with fate,
true to the time,
•ed at the trysting.phee. His
wopearance
is
costume arm tgeithalnatnlemr in an
of a London " swell"
said to be that or a 'lman about
town," rather portly and not bad-looking. He exhibited
himself with cane and letter in his right hand for three-
quarters of an hour, evidently in a very excited state, and
then began to move up and down the street at a
very
rapid pace. He made the circuit of Bedford-street North,
Chatham-street, and Crown-street, between Brownlow-hill
and Abercromby-square ; when our wags, having gathered
some of the inhabitants to gi •ve a charivari, their "dread
laugh" soon convinced him of the real state of matters,
and he shot away through Elizabeth-street, towards Pea,
broke-place, and disappeared.—Liverpool Jourpial.

Rustratia.

THE "FOX" LINE OF PACKETS.

LIVERPOOL TO AUSTRALIA.
(Established a Quarter of a Century.)
For, MELBOURNE, PORT PHILIP, Direct,
The splendid new British Clipper-built Packet-
ship
k.ts4 CREST OF THE WAVE,
kr...t.A105 J. STBELE, Commander;
1,500 tons ; A 1 for thirteen years ; on her
first voyage. Taking Saloon and Second Cabin Passengers
only.—For Rates apply to
HENRY FOX, 2. King-street, Liverpool.

THE "FOX" LINE or PACKETS.

For MELBOURNE, GEELONG, and
SYDNEY,
t.4.04,\ The magnificent Packet-ship .kFRICA,
11 H. O'NEIL, Commander;
- - 2,500 tons; AI at Lloyd's ; a regular trader.
Superb accommodation for Saloon, Second Cabin, Interme-
diate, and Third Class Passengers.
For Rates apply to Messrs. MAGEE and JAS. LEVINGSTON,
Owners ; or to HENRY FOX, 2, King-street, Liverpool.

"BLACK BALL" LINE OF AUSTRALIAN PACKETS.
In consequence of the loss of the GREAT REPUBLIC, the
undersigned have arranged to despatch their splendid new
Clipper-ship SALDANHA in her place.
Goods shipped by the above line are landed on the wharf
without delay, the owners having Lighters for the purpose.
Carries a full Band of Music, as well as Chess, Backgammon,
and Draft Boards, for the amusement of the passengers.
For MELBOURNE, Pour PHILIP,
With passengers, parcels, specie, and a limited quantity of
freight.
To sail on the 20th February next.
The magnificent new clipper Packet Ship
,at ••11

SALDANHA,

JOHN FINLAY, Commander;
1,563 tons register; A 1 at Lloyd's; coppered and copper-
fastened. This splendid Vessel was built under special
survey, and is expected to compete successfully as regards
sailing qualities, and in every other respect. with any Ship
afloat. The accom molation for passengers is of a class rarely
to be met with.—Apply to
JAMES BAINES and CO., 6, Cook-street.

"WHITE STAR" LINI4.
OF
it, 116. AUSTRALIAN PACKETS.
fa 7/ • „, LOADING BERTH, SALTHOUSE DOCK.
Ship. Tons. Captain. For To sail.
TAY!. EU R.... .4,000.. No BLE.. MELBOURNE.. 17th Jan.
GOLDEN ERA.. 3,000.. PEAT .. MELBOURNE.. In Feb.
BEN NEVIS.... 3,500.. HErtoN.. MELBOURNE.. To follow.

For MELBOURNE, PORT PHILIP,
(Landing. Passengers and their Luggage at the Wharf,)
The magnificent new Clipper-ship
TAYLEUR,
J. NOBLE, Commander;
2,400 tons register ; 4,000 ton.; Unrthen.
. _

Landing Passengers ';'it Sydney, Adelaide, and Geelong.
This truly splendid Vessel, just launched, and the largest
Merchantman ever built in England, will undoubtedly prove
to be the fastest of the Australian Fleet, as she has been con-
structed expressly with the object of attaining the very highest
rate of speed. Her vast dimensions enable the Owners to
provide Passenger Accommodation not to he met with in any
Vessel afloat. Thorough Ventilation has been secured, and,
by means of Ports, of which she has one at every seven feet,
and numerous Skylights, the Passenger-deck is perfectly
lighted in every part. The undersigned have, therefore, no
hesitation in affirming that the TAy Lava, presents advantage&
as a Passenger Conveyance superior to any Ship hitherto des-
patched to the Australian Colonies.
PILKINGTON and WILSON,
3, Commercial-buildings, Water-street, Liverpool.