The Liverpool Standard and General Commercial Advertiser.
Liverpool, Merseyside, England, 1840-12-29 00:00:00

you as gi

on at fire and twenty shillings? -
Did you ever know a red-haired man who had a very clear

notion of where scarlet began and auburn terminated ?
Did you ever know a beef-eater to go to the play in his
uniform ?

Did you ever know a subscriber to the Anti-Cruelty-to-
Animals Society who didn't kick the cat ?
Did you ever know a lady with fine eyes wear green spec-
tacles ?
Did you ever know an amateur singer without a " horrid
bad cold ?"
Did you ever see a cool fat woman in black in the dog-
days ?

bid you ever go to see Jack Sheppard without feeling a
to run home and rob your mother?
ever know an author who had not been particularly
propensity
pidy ou
ill-used by the booksellers ?
Did you ever know fifty killed and wounded by a railroad
accident, without the fifty who were killed be;ng congratulated
by the directors that they were only wounded ?

THE DUKE OF WELLINGTON ON EDUCATION.—The
following anecdote of the Duke of Wellington was last week
related by the Bishop of Exeter, who had it from a high
quarter, at the usual meeting of the Exeter Diocesan Board
of Education :—" Abnut 30 years since, on the noble Duke's
return from India, he found the whole country running mad
on the question of education, the plan of Lancaster having
just been promulgated here. Dining one day, soon after his
arrival in England, at the table of a noble friend, education
and the plan of Lancaster became the topic of conversation.
The duke listened awhile, and having heard the arguments
pro and con., at length addressed the company in a most em-
phatic manner, saying, Take care what you are about, for
unless the education you give is based upon religion, You are
only making so-many more clever devils.' "—Falmouth
Packet.

The year after the appearance of this work, he published
" Death and other Poems," in blank verse. Another year
brought with it another production, which added fresh laurels
to those already won. ThiS was called " Satan," and
abounds with profound reasoning and splendid imagery—
" thoughts that kreathe, and words that burn." There
seems, however, blended in this poem a tone of melancholy,
.
.amed fame, he

as though, notwithstanding
had found that it was not happiness :
" From earthly soil, no flowers of inward bliss,
Perennial bloom ; they flourish in the mind

Alone ; itself its own true

lappmess.—
Satan,—Book
The profits arising from the very extensive sale of his
orks, had now rescued Mr. Montgomery from the many
trials and almost overwhelming storms through which Almighty

God had been pleased to calrhim to pass, and rendered hin;
now able to commence his collegiate studies at Oxford, pre-
paratory to his great and noble design of dedicating his bril-
liant talents to the holy service and glory of Him from whom
he had so freely received them. Poetry, however, still ex-
erted its bewitching influence oyer his mind, and during his
residence at that ancient and renowned seat of learning, he
successively produced his work, entitled " Oxford,' and
that admirable production' entitled " Messiah," in the pre-
face to which he says, after deEcribing the true aim of poetry,
"To aspire after this can form no man's disgrace. He may
not secure fame ; but assuredly he partakes of a higher re-
ward than reputation can bestow, while he endeavours to pro-
mote that elevation of mind which constitutes the true enjoy-
ment of a being whose ' destiny survives the world."—
These noble sentiments were quite in harmony with those
nobler and purer aims which those friends who had the pri-
vilege of an intimate acquaintance with him at Oxford, saw
with pleasure, had assumed the predominance over his mind.
For notwithstanding that, from the great power and resources
#
of his genius, he was contsantl • acquiring fresh laurels, he
seemed rightly to estimate ths ing phantom fame, which
he had sought with so muc ess in his youthful days,
but which, when obtained, found to be but empty air,

and miserably insufficient to satisfy the nobler desires of an
immortal spirit—that heavenly spark, which, emanating from
God himself, can never enjoy real happiness, save in the
favour and presence of Him, whom to know is eternal life,
and from whom alone proceedeth happiness that is true, solid,
and lasting.

VARIETIES

" I wish to know, sir, if you called me an ass ? " " Yes,
sir ; but I qualified it." " Aha ! sir, you qualified it, did
you ? The better for you, sir ; and pray how did you qualify
it ? " " I said you were an ass, sir—all but the ears."
LUCIFERS.—" I wonder how they make lucifer matches,"
said a young married lady to her husband, about six weeks
after their nuptials, and with whom she could never agree.
" The process is very simple," he replied ; " I once made
one." " Indeed ! and pray how did you manage it." "By
going to church with you," was the brief and satisfactory
explanation.

STEW LAND MEASURE TADLE.---" Oh dear !" blubbered
an urchin, who had just been suffering from an application
of the birch, " Oh, my ! they tell me about forty rods make
a furlong, but I can tell a bigger story than that. Let 'em
get such a plaguy licken as I've had, and they'll find that
one rod makes an acher."

MODERATE INTEREST.—The Bank of England, establish-
ed about two years and a half before, with a capital of
£140,000, lent, in July of 1696, £200,000, to pay the Fle-
mish troops, demanding £lB,OOO for the loan, when no one
else would take the Exchequer tallies under 30 per cent.—
James's Court and Times of William 111.

PUPPYISM.—A dandy went into a haberdasher's shop to
purchase a watch ribbor , which cost 4d. He laid Is. on the
counter, and the shopman gave him 6d. only, forgetting the
copper was due to him ; so after a short time the lounger,
looking at the man, said, " Fellow, fatigue me with the 2d.
—Jamaica paper
FALLING STARS.—M. Capocci, director of the Ob-
servatory at Naples, has related twelve cases of the of
aerolites since 1809, about the 29th November of each year.
The dates are as follow :-1809, 29th November; 1810.28 th ;
1827, 29th ; 1821, 30th ; 1822, 22th ; 1823, 27th ; 1824, 20th ;
1831, 26th ; 1839, 29th. On the 26th of July last, he ob-
served a great fall of stars.
A coxcomb, boasting, on Saturday evening, in the Chapter
Coffee-house, of his travels, being asked his opinion of
Scotland. said, " It was a flat country, and not picturesque,
compared with his dear Switzerland." A Scotch gentleman,
who was present, said, " It was true, if mountains were flat,
it was a flat country ; but he would find it difficult to find a
flat among the natives, and for that the young traveller must
look nearer home."

Cobbett said, thirty years ago, "The boy eats fat bacon as
if he'd swallow the whole hog." l'he Yankees have taken
credit for this notable saying ; and amongst a thousand others
which have been worn threadbare in our long-shore regions,
have immortalised it as a Slick ism ! Good things, as they
are called, like good porter, improve by sea-carriage, we arc
to presume, and return to us better than good.
ODD IDEA OF OLD ENGLAND.—About 700 years since
an
.Arabian geographer employed at the Sicilian Court de-
scribed the different countries of the world in a most curious

•+~•s•"'xi. W 1.311,, duverts urictly LU Ealgitm, alll.l repru-
seas it as " a considerable island, having the shape of an
• •

ostrich's head, and containing flourishing cities, high moun-
tains, great rivers, and spacious plains ; the soil being fertile ;
the people brave, active, and enterprising, but the climate
subjected to perpetual winter." Hastings and Shoreham,
with their shallow insecure harbours, then held the important
position which has since been attained by Liverpool, Ply-
mouth, and other places ; though we learn with fair national
pride, that England, so far back as the twelfth century, when
only in the cradle of her commerce, could boast, as she now
does,' of adventurous merchants and undaunted sailors.

ECONOMY OF FOOD.—The Royal Agricultural Society of
England has offered a prize of ten sovereigns, or a piece of
plate of that value, for the best directions to enable labour-
ers to prepare wholesome, nutritious, and palatable food, in
. .
the most

economical and easy manner. As the object of the
society in offering this prize is to procure such instructions
for agricultural labourers as may enable them to supply them-
selves with the greatest quantity of nutriment which the
means at their command will produce, and to prepare a warm,
comfortable, and nutritious meal for themselves and their
families, when they return home from their day's work, the
competitors for it are requested to observe-1. That the re-
ceipts must be given in such a plain manner as may render
them available to the labourer or his wife, who are unaccus-
tomed to cookery. 2. That the receipts must be such as may
be used without reouirincr any apparatus which any acrricnl.•

tural labourer does not usually possess. 3. That They shall
not require the use of any ingredients which he may not
easily procure, either from his garden, or in agricultural vil-
lages. (This condition is not intended to preclude the re-
commendation of fish as a part of any dish.) 4. The cost of
the different dishes must be accurately stated.

CHANGE OF DlET.—Majendie, a celebrated French phy-
siologist, found by experiment that it was " impossible to
keep an animal in a healthy state longer than six weeks upon
one article of diet, death frequently taking place before that
period." The sheep farmer, who knows his business, will
take especial care never to et his sheep lose flesh till they
are folded. He will then cut their turnips, or will crush
t the'- -"

oilcake,- as the case may be ; he will give them plenty
of salt, in roofed troughs or fixed casks with the heads taken
out, and also a ton of good hay for every hundred sheen.

en days or a fortnight. He will avoid all sudden
changes of food, and will only feed off the bleakest part of
his farm, in order to reserve the more selected parts for the
severest periods of the winter. Swedes, in addition to their
more nutritive qualities, are superior to other varieties of the
turnip for folding, where they are not cut. From the gene-
ral form of the Swede roots, they do not permit the rain to
lodge and freeze hard upon the top of the bulbs, so as to em-
barrass the biting of the sheep.

A SUNSET ON THE DANUBE.—On a fine evening we
ascended to the height beyond the palace in order to see a
sunset on the Danube, and a glorious sight it was ! Earth,
wood, and water seemed to swim in one atmosphere of gold
and topaz, and so magnificent a sky I never remember to
have beheld •, we were absolutely blinded with splendour; and
then suddenly turning our faces eastward, we seemed to have
been transported into a new world. The mountains rose
darkly against the deep purple horizon, save where they were
touched by the beams of the moon, which was pillowed for
a time upon the crest of the highest range : while her broad
line of light, after touching the topmost branches of the
forest trees at their base, streamed down upon the bosom of
the flood, and turned its tide to silver. And all was so still
upon that vine-covered hill! The wind played languidly
among the heavy grape leaves, awakening a low rustling,
which served but to make the silence more deeply felt; while
swift rushingof the mighty river at our feet was a fitting ac-
companiment to the scene on which we looked. I know not
how long we stood there. We took no note of tha time ; but
the golden glories of the sunset had deepened into dusk, and
the moon had risen high into the star-gemmed vaults of
heaven, looking down in brightness upon the mountains
against which she had so lately leant, ere we turned to re-
trace our steps towards the city. Miss Pardoe's City of the
Magyar.