The Liverpool Standard and General Commercial Advertiser.
Liverpool, Merseyside, England, 1853-11-08 00:00:00

Vapazine, No,

devoted to the combination of religious feeling with
lar business and amusement.-The People's
nd the Working Man's Friend. No.

Vagazi
L. Th(

orlung man has now so many friends,
that we suspect his capabilities of selection to be
greatly overtaxed in determining his choice. This
new friend professes to give counsel which shall

theworkix

a inhabit

ant of this

)f eternity

VARIETIES.
+

I Ts

lAN who v

a link in ti
overed.

FIRST CLASS IS M

chain of circumstances, and has

id meet h

KC stand up. Ho'
" Three, sir ; lone

_thing worth unless it has
been earned: a man should be at once susceptible of
passions, and able to subdue them.
COME HERE, SONNY, and tell me what the four seasons
are

SERENITY OP MIND- iS

gar—them's what
put that boy to

Pep
mammy al%
beA

mustard, salt, and vin(
s seasons with." " Mar 3
ie is so sharp he will cut somebody

A Lovß SCEN
ported by Frei

In.—Overheard and phon
derick Phinephun :—"
the Inver_ "rwhftriey my nh

zraphicall

phoresee the phearful consequence; of our phleeing phrom
your phather's phamily. Phew phellows could have phaced
the music with as much fortitude as I have ; and, as
phickle phortune phails to smile on our loves, I phind I
must phorego the pleasure of becoming your husband.
Phairest Phrances, pharewell phor ever." " Hold, Pprank-
lin, hold !" screamed Phrances, " I will phollow you for
ever." But Phranklin had phled, and Phrances phainted.
"THE SCHOOLMASTER ABROAD."—A letter, of which
the following is a literal copy; was received at the Retford
police-station a few days ago, from a tradesman at Wellow.
We ought to say that the scribe himself is a baker, other-
wise our readers might, perchance, fail to ascertain its
meaning :—Oct. 15-1853.—Sir hi sent to you the peck
And Mechers And Beem to Bee Made Right
Pies to due them to day Plees to send the 2 pees of Iced
Bak Ass theay was not weeghts theay was put in for to
Hay love for waste in Backin.—Polis Stasinon Retfor.

'him DEACON'S "down east" have a bad pructitm or
snoring aloud whilst asleep in church, which appears to
disturb some folks here. The Boston Bee has the follow-
ing polite notice for one of them :—" Deacon is re-
quested not to commence snoring to-morrow until the
sermon is begun, as some persons in the neighbourhood of
his pew would like to hear the text."
A YOUNG LADY'S DILEMMA.—At a temperance meet-
ing in London, lately, an incident occurred which occa-
sioned some mirth. In consequence of the remarks made

by Mr. Fry on the subject of Courtship, a note was handed
up to him as follows :—" I have a lover who is a moderate

drinker, If I discard him, will you warrant me a tee-
totaller in his stead ?" After the laughter occasioned by
the reading of this had subsided, Mr. Fry advised the lady
by no means to discard her lover, but to use all her in-
fluence to make him a teetotaller. He thought that if she
used a little address, and exercised a little patience, she
would win her lover before 1853 expired. _ _ _

ELOQUENCE OF A YANKEE THONDEREB.—One Paul
Denton, a Methodist preacher in Texas, advertised a bar-
bacue, with better liquor than usually furnished. When
the people were assembled, a desperado in the crowd cried
out, Mr. Paul Denton, your reverence has lied. You
promised us not only good barbacue, but better liquor.
Where is the liquor ?" " There !" (answered the mis-
sionary in tones of thunder), and (says a Yankee contem-
porary) pointed his motionless finger at the matchless
double spring, gushing up in two strong columns, with a
sound like a shout of joy from the bosom of the earth.
" There !" he repeated, with a look terrible as the light-
ning (while his enemy actually trembled on his feet),
"there is the liquor which God, the Eternal, brews for all
His children ! Not in the simpering still, over smoky
fires, choked with poisonous gases, and surrounded with
the stench of sickening odours and rank corruptions, doth
your Father in heaven prepare the precious essence of life,
the pure cold water ; but in the green glade and grassy
dell, where the red deer wanders, and the child loves to
play—there God brews it ; and down, low down in the deep-
est valleys, where the fountain murmurs and the rills sing;
and high upon the tall mountain tops, where the naked
granite glitters like gold in the sun, where the storm-
cloud broods and the thunder-storms crash ; and away far
out on the wide, wild sea, where the hurricane howls
music, and the big waves roar the chorus, sweeping the
march of God—there He brews it, that beverage of life,
health-giving water. And everywhere it is a thing of
beauty ; gleaming in the dewdrop ; singing in the sum-
mer rain; shining in the ice gem, till the trees all seem
turned to living jewels, spreading a golden veil over the
setting sun, or a white gauze around the midnight moon ;
sporting in the cataract ; sleeping in the glacier; dancing
in the hail showers ; gilding its bright snow curtains softly
about the wintry wor ; weaving the many-coloured iris,
that seraph's zone of the sky, whose warp is the rain-drop
of earth, whose woof is the sun-beam of heaven, all
checkered over with the celestial flowers, by the mystic
hand of refraction. Still always it is beautiful—that
blessed life-water ! No poison bubbles on its brink ; its
foam brings no madness and murder ; no blood stains its
liquid glass • pale widows and starving orphans weep no
burning tears in its depths ;no drunkard's shrieking ghost
from the grave curses it in words of eternal despair !
Speak out, my friends ; would you exchange it for demon's
drink, alcohol F" A shout like the roar of a tempest
answered, "No !"

A PYRAMID IN CALIFORNIA.—The Placerville (Cali-
fornia) Herald gives the following account of the dis-
covery of a pyramid in California :—A party of men, five
in number, had ascended the Colorado for nearly two
hundred milesi above the mouth of the Gila, their object
being to discover, if possible, some large tributary from
the west, by which they might make the passage of the
desert, and enter California by a new, more direct, and
easier route, inasmuch as there are known to exist nume-
rous small streams upon the eastern slope of the moun-
tains, that are either lost in the sands of the desert or
unite with the Colorado through tributaries heretofore
unknown. They represent the country on either side of
the Colorado as almost totally barren of every vegetable
product, and so level and monotonous that any object suf-
ficient to arrest the attention possesses more or less of
curiosity and interest, and it was this that led to the dis-
covery and examination of this hitherto unknown relic of
a forgotten age. An object appeared upon the plain to
the west, having so much the appearance of a work of art,
from the regularity of its outline and its isolated position,
that the party determined upon visiting it. Passing over
an almost barren sand plain, a distance of nearly five miles,
they reached the base of one of the most wonderful objects,
considering its location, it being the very home of desola-
tion, that the mind can possibly conceive of, nothing less
than an immense stone pyramid, composed of layers or
courses of from eighteen inches to nearly three feet in
thickness, and from five to eight feet in length. It has a
level top of more than fifty feet square, though it is evi-
dent it vas once completed, but that some great convul-

sion of nature has displaced its entire top, as it evidently
now lies a huge and broken mass upon one of its sides,
though nearly covered by the sands. This pyramid differs,
in some respects, from the Egyptian pyramids. It is, or
was, more slender and pointed ; and, while those of Egypt
are composed of steps or layers, receding as they rise, the
American pyramid was, undoubtedly, a more finished
structure. The outer surface of the blocks was evidently
cut to an angle, that gave the structure, when complete, a
smooth or regular surface from top to bottom. From the
present level of the sands that surround it, there are fifty-
two distinct layers of stone, that will average at least two
feet ; this gives its present height 104 feet, so that before
the top was displaced it must have been, judging from an
angle of its sides, at least twenty feet higher than at
present. How far it extends beneath the surface of the
sands it is impossible to determine without great labour.
Such is the age of this immense structure, that the per-
pendicular joints between the blocks are worn away to the
width or rrum five tau inches at the bottom of each
joint, and the entire of the pyramid so much worn by the
stonnB, the vicissitudes and th
to make it pm,, —e v1.7(.1(111;1_ gs of centuries, as

sides.iiiire'4l"in ascent, parties arty upon one or rts
sady one of its sides,.because a very singular
fad cone pith with this -most remarkable structure is,
that it in • ten degrees to ow side of :the vertical or
OrPendiOdar.