The Liverpool Standard and General Commercial Advertiser.
Liverpool, Merseyside, England, 1854-02-14 00:00:00

VARIETIES.

Pas PAPER Mums of the county of Edinburgh alone
produce 150 miles of paper, five feet broad, every day.

NOTHING is more terrible than active ignorance.—
Goethe.
SHE THAT 31AuuiEs a man because he is " a good
match," must not be surprised if he turns out a " Lucifer."
A WITTY FELLOW slipped down on an icy pavement.
While sitting, he muttered, " I've no desire to see the
city burned down, but I sincerely wish the streets were
laid in ashes .1"

IT APPEARS that in London there is an organised band
of perjurers ready to give any evidence required by a cab-
man in difficulties. These persons go by the name of
" mounters."

RED HAlE.—There is among Europeans generally a
strong dislike to red hair ; but in Spain red hair is ad-
mired almost to adoration, and there is a story told of one
of our naval commanders, who luxuriated in fiery locks,
being idolised and caressed in consequence by the Spanish
women, and looked upon as a perfect Adonis. Red hair
is often considered a deformity ; but why it should be it

is hard to say, since in all cases the haii and coinACZion
suit each other admirably ; the "golden locks" and
"sunny tresses" of the poets invariably accompanied the
blonde, frank, and manly faces inherited from Saxon an-
cestors. We have heard of " villainous red hair," and
" horrid red whiskers ;" but hair is only " villainous" and
whiskers " horrible" when the first is dirty, and the last
worn without regard to the kind of cheeks they surround,.
—Rowland on the Hair.

THE NATIONAL DEBT.—Most of our readers will not
require to be told how this debt, which William 111. left
at £16,000,000 sterling, had, at the accession of William
IV., reached the enormous amount of upwards of
£800,000,000, the yearly charge on which for interest was
double the amount of the original debt of the country.
The fatal necessities of war had caused this aggravation
of our expenditure. Of the £770,000,000 of stock created
by loans between the years 1794 and 1817, nearly the
whole had been the consequence of the hostile attitude of
France. In one single year-1814, in which our greatest
efforts against Napoleon had been made—not less than
£93,000,000 was thus added to the funded debt of the
country ; in the two following years an equally gigantic
amount was added. During the early years of national
loans 6 per cent. was the legal rate of interest ; although,
in fact, much more was frequently given. We read that
in 1692 the government offered 8 and 10 per cent. for a
loan of £1,000,000, yet could obtain but three-fourths of
the required amount. During the reign of Anne and
George I. high rates of interest were given for the moneys
required; and although such rates have long since ceased,
a practice, amounting in effect to the same thing, was very
common during the late wars, It was a customary pro-
ceeding for the government which needed a loan of
£10,000,000 to issue stock to the lenders for £12,000,000
or £13,000,000, as an inducement for them to provide the
money ; hence, although only 4 per cent. was the nominal
interest allowed, it in fact amounted to 41, and sometimes
to 5 per cent. on the sum actually raised. It is worthy of
remembrance that in the year 1796, £18,000,000 sterling
was subscribed in London by way of loan in 16 hours,
with the view of enabling the government to prosecute
the war with republican Frances—Dickens's Household
Words.

EXPERIMENTAL PHILOSOPHY.—Asking a friend to lend
you money. Moral philosophy—refusing to do it.

NEW READINGS.—A remarkably new reading was
given to a line from the " Lady of Lyons," at a Boston
(United States) theatre. Beauseant says, " Confusion ! it
will be all over Lyons before sunset !" The aspiring
emendator gave it, " Confusion !" it will be all over sunset
before Lyons !" This reminds us of a passage from the
melodrama of the " Forest Glades," where the baron
exclaims, " Die ! traitor die !" In the heat of the moment
the excited player vociferated, " Dry, tater, dry !"
LIVING AS ONE PLEASES.—It is a foolish thing that
one can't only not live as one pleases, but where and with
whom one pleases without money. Swift somewhere says
that money is liberty ; and I fear money is friendship too,
and society, and almost every external friendship. It is a
great, though ill-natured comfort, to see most of those
who have it in plenty, without pleasure, without liberty,
and without friends.—Letters of Gray.

A WELL-MATCHED PAIR.—In the RatcliffUnion Work-
house, a few days since, a basket-maker and his wife died,
both at the age of seventy-five years, the former of
natural decay," the latter of "natural decay." They
had come from Shadwell market. The registrar relates a
singular coincidence in the lives of this aged couple. They
were born in the same year and on the same day of the
month, and died within half an hour of each other.—
Weekly News.

AN ENGLISH AUCTIONEER AT MANILLA.—One day I
was much amused at an auction, where, as I walked past
the open windows of the house, I heard the auctioneer
pronouncing Spanish in the most extraordinary way, as,
" A dos raies," "A dos riales," " Grasias," &c., and,
looking in, I found that the knight of the hammer was an
Englishman from Sydney, who had set up here as an
auctioneer, with the apparent disadvantage of knowing
very little of the language. But he told me, on my
speaking to him, that this had quite a contrary effect,
observing, " They understands we well enough, .and it
makes 'em laugh, and then they bids."—Sketeher's Tour
Round the World.
THE CHASE IN NAPLES.—The party go out in great
dignity, following a peasant and an owl. When the
peasant comes to a place where there are numb,--, of little
Nrds he hoists up the pole and exposes the owl. -in,
insai& I.—.....diately gather together from all
quarters, to deride the owl. The sportsman then let fly
with all possible barrels, right and left, and blow the
idiots to pieces, occasionally shattering the owl instead.
If any piece of a bird large enough to cook is left hanging
together—which is not often, it is subsequently dressed
and eaten. The owl catches cold, I believe, and dies.—The
Field.

THE CLOCK AT STRASBITEG.—In the cathedral at Stras-
burg stands a clock of most curious workmanship s at
every quarter of an hour, some puppet with an emblem of
death appears—Time with his scythe, or Fate herself with
the hour-glass ; but when midday strikes, all those figures
which are emblematic of mortality, pass in front of the
dial-plate ; a child is seen in its mother's arms, there is a
bridal party at the altar, and a new-made grave. Mean-
while, the day of the month, the month of the year, the
movements of the planets, all are represented : a clock,
indeed, of most wondrous workmanship, but most re-
markable of all, that it is only wound up once in half a
century.

A NOVEL CoNDENsEn.—Moonlight night ; a shady
grove ; two lovers ; eternal fidelity : young lady rich ;
young man poor; great obstacle ; young man proud; very
handsome; very smart, sure to make a fortune; young
lady's father very angry ; won't consent ; mother inter-
cedes ; no go ; rich rival ; very ugly - very hard hearted ;
lovers in a bad fix ; won't part ; die first ; moonlight
again ; garret window opens ; rope ladder; flight ; pur-
suit; too late ; marriage; old man in a rage ; won't
forgive them ; disowns them ; old man gets sick ; sends
for his daughter ; all forgiven ; all made up ; young man
getting rich ; old man dies ; young couple get all the
money ; live in the old mansion ; quite comfortable ; have
tittle children; and much happiness.—Finis.
GEOGRAPHY A MILITARY SCIENCE.—An anecdote is
current which goes to show that the examiners at Sand-
hurst are rather particular. A youth was lately plucked
in geography. He did not know the precise situation of
Fernando Po. He mentioned the fact to, his father, a
baronet, mingling in the highest circles ; " Fernando Po,"
exclaimed the baronet, " stuff ! there's no such place, at
least I never heard of it." This was said' at the door of a
club in St. James's. By and by, a general officer, more
than usually unacquainted with the scientific branches of
his profession, drove by. " Hollo, —," cries out the
baronet to him, " where the deuce is Fernando Po ?—do
tell us." " How the d—l should I know ?" rejoined the
general, and drove on. The reader will be reminded by
this of the anecdote in one of Bourcicault's comedies. A
general is told of the battle of Hastings, where the English
were thrashed by the French. "The battle of Hastings !"
ejaculated the indignant soldier, " there never was such a
battle ! It is not mentioned in the Army List.7—United
Service Gazette.

A SORTS AMERICAN WATERING PLACE.—Ladies and
gentlemen all bathe together, and meet their-acquaint-
ances in the water as if it were at an evening party. The
usual time is between eight and nine a.m. andfour p.m.
At these hours you will ;see all the fashionables walking
leisurely down the steep cliff to the sea. At the bottom
oliff, close to the sea, are built a number of small
cane ranchvs rooms, and towels and bathing
dresses are provided by men who wait upon the bathers.
The ladies put on a very. becoming costume, wide blue
trousers, tied at the ankles, and a short blue frock, both
ornamented with two white hems, and a straw hat ; but
they have their hair done as carefully as if they were going
to a ball. Round +h -v wear a pairof gourds,
and walk boldly into the sea; tine gourub them
and they float and swim about quite at their ease.
gentlemen wear a blue shirt and trousers, and a straw
hat. Canvass shoes are very necessary, as the shore is
shingly. In the evening some one or other generally
gives a dance, to which all come without ceremony, the
young ladies taking it in turn at the pianoforte.—A
Sketcher's Tour Round the World.
A YANKEE SILENCED.—One of the- last stories of
Yankee inquisitiveness makes the victim give his tor-
mentor a direct cut in telling him he wished to be asked
no further questions. The inquisitor fell back a moment
to take breath and change his tactics.. The half-sup-
pressed smile on the faces of the other passengers soon
roused him to further exertions ; and, summing up more
resolution, he began :—" Stranger, perhaps you are not
aware-how almighty hard it is for a Yankee to control his
curiosity. You'll please excuse me, but I really would
like to know your name, and residence, and the business
you follow. I expect you ain't ashamed of either of 'em.
so now won't you just obleedge me ?" This appeal brought
out the traveller, who, rising up, to the extremest
height allowed by the coach, and throwing back his
shoulders, replied :—" My name- is. Andrew General
Washington ; I reside in the State of Mississippi. I am
a man of leisure, and I am glad to say of extensive means.
I have heard much of New York, and am on my way to
see it ; and if I like it as well: as I am led to expect, I
intend—to buy it." Then was heard a shout of stentorian
laughter throughout the stage-coach ; and this was the
last of the conversation.

CREEPING THINGS.—Let me put a spider into any
lady's hand. She is aghast. She shrieks. The nasty
ugly thing. Madam, the spider is perhaps shocked at
your Brussels laces, and, although you may be the most
exquisite miniature painter living, the spider has a right
to laugh at your coarse daubs as she runs over them. Just
show her your crotchet work when you shriek at her.
" Have you spent half your days," the spider, if she be
spiteful, may remark, "have you spent half your days
upon these clumsy anti-macassars and these ottoman
covers ? My dear lady is that your web ? If I were big
enough, I might with reason drop you and cry out at you.
Let me spend a day with you and bring my work. I have
four little bags of thread—such little bags ! In every
bag there are more than 1,000 holes—such tiny tiny holes !
Oat of each hole thread runs, and all the threads—more
than 4,000 threads—l spin together as they run, and when
they are all spun they make but one thread of the web I
weave. I have a member of my family who is herself no
bigger than a grain of sand. Imagine what a slender
web she makes, and of that, too, each thread is made of
4,000 or 5,000 threads that have passed out of her four
bags through 4,000 or 5,000 little holes. Would you drop
her, too, crying out about your delicacy ? A pretty thing,
indeed, for you to plume yourselves on your delicacy, and
scream at us." Having made such a speech, we may sup-
pose that the indignant creature fastens a rope round one
of the rough points of the lady's hand, and lets herself
down lightly to the floor. Coming down stairs is noisy,
clumsy work, compared with such a way of locomotion.
The creeping things we scorn are miracles of beauty. They
are more delicate than any ormolu clock or any lady's
watch made, for pleasure's sake, no bigger than a shilling.
Lyonet counted 4,041 muscles in a single caterpillar, and
these are a small part only of its works. Hooke found
14,000 mirrors in the eye of a bluebottle, and there are
13,300 separate bits that go to provide nothing but the
act of breathing in a corp.—Dickens's Household Words.
THE MISFORTUNES OF A MousrAcna.—There has of
late been a growing disposition in. " young England" to
imitate the Frenchman in his moustache, and the Yankee
in his peaked beard. The adoption of either the one or the
other of these innovations is according to the idiosyncrasy
of ,the man. Sentimentalists wear elaborately curled
moustaches and " go-a-heads " flourish beards of patri-
archal dimensions. John Bull—Old England—is full of
scorn at these innovations. With the moustache is
associated in his mind stories of well-dressed sharpers ;
and, with the beard, the despised children of Abraham.
He believes no man to be respectable who does not shave,
every morning, chin and lip. He may use hot water or
cold, that's a matter of taste, but shave he must. Ris no
use telling him that a century or two ago our athersreoff
cultivated moustaches and wagged their beards. It is no
use telling him that health is preserved thereby. " Who,"
he asks, told you so ?" " The Doctors," is the answer.
Sarcastically he repeats "The Doctors r and adds, "and,
perhaps, the razor manufacturers will join the doctors in
cutting their own throats !" Say not one word in reply
to this crushing argument and the English lion is roused.
Truly that is a sight worth seeing, for he is becoming so
very pious and peaceable. It is no wonder, therefore, that
any one who dares to tread upon the toes of old English
prejudice in this respect, should be a sufferer. Every hair
in beard or moustache brings a curse. Here is the his-
tory of a moustache. A sentimental young man, a law-
yer's clerk, allowed nature to have her own way with his
upper lip. One morning the rich lawyer heard his daugh=
ter say to the moustache, " How interesting !" Trouble
number one followed quickly. The moustache got notice
to quit instanter. He sought other employment, but the
moustache was always in the way. Men looked at him
askance, and hinted at the necessity of his giving large
security for his honesty. Out at elbows, he at length was
appointed poet to a Jew tailor. However, it was soon
found out that because a man wore a moustache and
combed his hair back, he was not necessarily a poet, and
the moustache was rudely ejected from his high place.
Even yet he might have saved himself, but, oh ! the
vanity of young men ! He had an uncle, a razor manu-
facturer, who offered to befriend him if he would cut the
moustache. No,- his moustache and his rags were better
than a shaved lip, clean linen, and good company. The
uncle died soon afterwards, and instead of leaving all his
wealth to his nephew, left him—nothing ! It was not for
haveAftemr
adeii
some time
his
that his nephew knew how great
hatitdudbeeethnahmt worldenduring
greathhardships
snh iapsbeivitttehr aeaufosre:
he found a vocation in which he could cultivate his hairs
mmpeace. He is now a supernumerary at a casino. Young
en, beware