The Liverpool Standard and General Commercial Advertiser.
Liverpool, Merseyside, England, 1847-11-16 00:00:00

VARIETIES.

Nero, the Roman emperor, gave 6,000 sestercia. a sum
equal to £50,000 sterling, for two drinking cups made of
glass.
Truly and beautifully has it been said, that the veil
which covers futurity has been woven by the hand of
mercy.

There is a family in Box, llerts, consisting of father,'
mother, son, and daughter, whose united ages are only 33
years. The age of the father is 17; that of the mother
15 ; and the children, who are twins, a few weeks.
BRlGHTON.—Brighton is abbreviated from Brighthelm-
stone, or " the holy stone" of the Britons, so named by
the Saxon invaders, who found the Cromlech on the
Church-hill, which is now removed, but which the writer
well remembers to have seen when a boy at school there.
In some of the English schools in Wales, when a scho-
lar is heard speaking Welsh, he is punished by being
obliged to carry about with him a wooden pin, until he is
luCky enough to catch one of his companions committing
the same offence, when he joyfully transfers the detested
pin to the fresh culprit.
A DRUNKEN Doc.—At Malmeshury, there is a dog
belonging to a brewer that becomes intoxicated regularly
every Monday. During six days of the week it is his oc-
cupation to lick the droppings from the various taps on
the premises ; on the Sunday he is tied up, and gets com-
pletely sobered.

A NAIVE ADMISSION.—A case was heard on Friday at
Halifax, in which two women appeared as plaintiff and
defendant. The latter handed to the Bench a written
" character," testifying to her peaceable disposition, &c.
The plaintiff innocently remarked—" I had a character
once, but I lost it some time ago."
To CLEAN HAIR BRUSHES.—As hot water and soap
very soon soften the hairs, and rubbing completes their
destruction, use soda—having an affinity for grease, it
cleans the brush with a little friction. Do not set them
near the fire nor in the sun to dry, but after shaking them
well, set them on the point of the handle in a shady place.
ONE OF THE "SWEETS" OF THE GENTLE ART.—
Angling for twelve or fourteen hours, alone, without one
bite, though perpetually tantalised with bobs; or when
you have hooked a fine large jack, seeing him take Fren: h
leave at the moment when you are courteously showing
him his nearest way to the bank.—Berelfbrds Miseries of
Human Life.
A WORD TO DUELISTS.—There is more true courage
and generosity in bearing and forgiving an injury for the
love of virtue, than in requiting if for another ; because
the thing is much more difficult. Bulls and bears have
courage enough, but it is a brutish courage, whereas ours
should be such as should become reasonable creatures and
Christians.—Gasten, Marquis de Reilly.
SCHOOLS THE SEMINARIES OF THE STATE.—I have
ever observed it, says Ben Jonson, to have been the office
of a wise patriot, among the greatest affairs of the state,
to take care of the conlinonwealth of learning. . For
schools, they are the seminaries of state; and nothing is
worthier the study of a statesman, than that part of the
republic which we call the advancement of letters.
THE DULCE AND THE UTILE.—When Sir John Carr
was in Glasgow, about the year 1807, he was asked by the
magistrates to give his advice concerning the inscription
to be placed on Nelson's monument, then just com-
pleted. The travelling knight recommended this brief
record—" Glasgow to Nelson." " True," said one of the
bailies, " and as there is the town of Nelson near us, we
might add, ' Glasgow to Nelson, ix MILES,' so that the
column might serve both for a mile-stone and a monu-
ment."
THE MATTER SETTLED FOR EVER.-We are too glad
to acknowledge an error. We have taken many liberties
lately with Louis-Philippe. The following vindication,
however, of his character must be more than sufficient re-
paration to his injured majesty. It comes from the lips of
no less an authority than Mr. Broughton, the police ma-
gistrate. The sceptical reader is referred to the Morning
Chronicle. " Louis -Philippe is one of the best men that
ever lived, and would not wrong any one of a farthing."
We hope Europe is convinced.—Punch.
The object of the sanatory movement may be summed
up in a few words ( says Fraser's Magazine) :—A sewer in
every street of every town and village ; a. drain for every
house ; a constant and unlimited supply of good water to
every family ; pure air at any cost ; the application of the
refuse of towns to the purposes of agriculture ; and,
lastly, to secure these blessings, the removal of every im-
pediment, physical and moral, and the destruction or re-
construction of every form of local administration which
does not work well towards these righteous ends.
BRITISH PATOIS.—In some parts of this kingdom,
Glamorganshire among the rest, the word calf is pro-
nounced cave—a gentleman in search of the picturesque
in that country, lately asked a rustic to lead him to a cave
which he was desirous of exploring. The unsophisticated
thaw-bacon, after sundry windings and climbings, brought
him to a fine calf, and no explanations whatever could
give him a clearer idea of the nature of the object of
which the geologist was in search. The gentleman then
went away, but without sundry looks of contempt
from his guide, who most probably thought himself the
wiser of the two.

AN ENGLISH LADY MISSIONARY IN CHINA.—Miss
Alderney, of Essex, has devoted her time and fortune to
the conversion of the Chinese. When I visited Chusan I
sought an interview with this highly accomplished lady,
and found her living entirely among the Chinese, in a
respectable family, with several Chinese ladies and a few
children as her companions. Twice a week she receives
all the poor, afflicted, and diseased, to whom she fur-
nishes medicine and comforts. She is now permanently
settled in Ningpo. A committee of English ladies ought
to be formed to second the efforts of this "Ministering
Angel," for such she appeared to the Chinese.—Mont-
gomery Martin's China.
CHEATING JOHN CHINAMAN.--11l the regulation of
port-dues considerable alteration has been made within
the last few years, but the old system had an inevitable
tendency to encourage smuggling, on account of the large
amount of duties which pressed more heavily upon small
ships than upon larger ones, the amount not being pro-
portioned to the size of the vessel : the consequence of
this was, that a most iniquitous system was carried on,
which for some time puzzled the Chinese authorities con-
siderably. The plan was this : a large vessel first went up
the river, paid her port dues, and discharged her cargo ;
which being cleared, another vessel came alongside during
the night, transferred her cargo into the larger one, and
hauled off again before daylight ; on the following day
this was again discharged into the boats as part of the
original cargo, and so on to the extent of fourteen or fif-
teen vessels, who thus cheated the Government. the duty
being levied, not upon the quantity of goods, but upon
the ship itself; which was thus made to contain about
8,0(10 Lou:;,much to the astonishment of till:, Chinon,—
Histion'a Ave Year; in the Eat.

A MATRIMONIAL ADVERTISER.—A story was told me,
with an assurance that it was literally true, of a gentle-
man who, being in want of a wife, advertised for one, and,
at the place and time appointed, was met by a lady. Their
stations in life entitled them to be so called, and the gen-
tleman, as well as the lady, was in earnest. H..; however,
unluckily seemed to be of the same opinion as King Pedrc
was with regard to his w re, Queen Mary of Arragon,
that she was not so hands ,me as she might be good, so
the meeting ended in their mutual disappointment.
Ccelebs advertised a second time, appointing a different
square.for the place of meeting, and varying the words of
the advertisement. He met the same lady—they recog-
nised each other—could not choose but smile at the recog-
nition, and, perhaps, neither of them could choose but
sigh. You will antHpate the event: The persevering
bachelor tried his lot a third time in the newspapers, and
at the third place of appointment. he met the equally per-
severing spinster. At this meeting neither could help
laughing. - They began to converse in good humour, and
the conversation became so agreeable on both sides, and
the circumstances appeared so remarkable, that this third
interview led to a marriage, and the marriage proved a
happy one.—The Doctor, by Southey.
FEMALE SOLDIERS.—After this procession, which con-
sisted altogether of about. eight thousand women, well
armed and clothed, had passed, the king asked me to go
and see what his women-soldiers were about to perform.
I was accordingly conducted to a large space of broken
ground, where fourteen days had been occupieel in erect-
ing three immense prickly piles of green brush. These
three clumps or piles,.of a sort of strong briar or thorn,
prmed with the most dangerous prickles, were placed in
late, occupying four hundred yards, leaving only a narrow
passage between them, sufficient merely to distinguish •
each. clump appointed to each regiment. These piles were
about seventy feet wide and eight feet high. Upon ex-
amining them I could not persuade myself that any
human being, without boots or shoes, would under any
e.r,almStances attempt to piss over so dangerous a collec-
tion of the most efficiently armed plants I had ever seen.
Behind these piles already mentioned were yards or large
pms, at the distance of three hundred yards, fenced with
pies seven feet high, thickly matted together with strong
reeds. • Enclosed therein were several linndred slaves be-
longing to the king. It may be well to state that this
affair was entirely got up to illustrate an attack upon a
town, and the capture of prisoners, who of course, are
made slaves. After waiting a short time, the Apadomey
soldiers made their appearance atabout two hundred yards
from or in front of the first pile, where they halted with'
shouldered arms. In a few seconds the word attack
was given, and a tush was ma 'e towards the I it.- with a
speed beyond conceptiut. ; and in less than ot:e minut
the whole body had passeu over this immense pile, and
had taken the supposed Lwn. Each of the other piles
was passed with Equal rapidity, at intervals of twenty
minutes; after which we aga:n returned to our former
station in the market place. Here we found his Majesty
waiting for us. He anxiously inquired how I was pleased
with the performance of his female soldiers, and asked if
I thought the same number of Englishwomen would per-
form the same. I, of course, answered no : we had no
female soldiers in England, but we had females who had,
individually and voluntarily, equally distingushed them-
selves. * * * I may be permitted to make a few re-
marks on the army of women. It is certainly a surprising
si4ht in an uncivilised country. I had, it is true, often
heard of the king's female soldiers in England, but now
I have seen them, all well armed, and generally fine
strong le-althy women, and doubtless capable of enduring
great fatigue. They seem to use the long Danish musket
with as much ease as one of our grenadiers does his fire-
lock ; not of course with the same quickness, as tley are
not tia'ned to any particular exercise, but on receiving
the woe d, mr:ke an attack lihe a pack hounds with great
swiftn-ss. Of course, they woull he useless against . dis-
ciplined troops, if at all approaching to the same numbers;
still, their appearance is more martial than the generality
of the men, and, if undertaking a campaign, I should pre-
fer the females to the male soldiers of this country. From
al I have seen of frica, I believe the king of Dahomey
possesses an army superior to any sovereign west of the
Great Desert.—Duncan's Travels in Western. Africa.