The Liverpool Standard and General Commercial Advertiser.
Liverpool, Merseyside, England, 1836-12-06 00:00:00

JONATHANIANA.

WHO WANTS s PLACE P—A gentleman in Nantucket ad-
vertises for " a servant of middle-sized character, large hands,
and small appetite."--This gentleman is supposed to be a near
relation of the lady who keeps' a boarding.-house in Mobile, and
advertises for " alew young men' boarders of moderate apPe-
tites and not over. particular;" and. to another lady in Nan-
tucket who offers economic board to " young men of moderate
means, quiet habits; early hours, no followers, and iood.diges-
tion for anything at hand."
WHAT WE CALL PLEASANT Under this head the Ealitors
of the Philadelphia Gazette, in a leading and 'angry paragraph,
give the following mighty pleasant predicament:— •: .
"An Editor's office, directly opposite, an auctioneer's esta-
blishment, before which stands a huge six-foot individual, ever-
more swinging aloud and horrid bell, whose tintinnabulations
might wake the Dead, and bring on a_premature Doomsday !"
UNPARALLELED IMPUDENCE!—" WO copy the following
unparalleled piece of impudence," says a New York Paper,
" from a scurrilous contemporary in this city, called the-
Eicropeav
"Two steam vessels are making in Coik, two in theTa: •
males, and half a dozen in the United States, for the conveni-
ence of Irish emigrants. The Lord be good to the fanatics of
New York; or they will have half the shilelahs of the Emerald
Isle walking about their calves' heads before they can say Jack ,
Robinson."—" The fellow who' wrote it should- be, clothed
with feathers and sent forth to journeY for a while upon the
most uncomfortable rail in his neighbourhood." •
iril.
tShiusthfaesrblaionnd, _
CONGRESSIONAL.—The Philadelphia Centinel slays, "Mr.
oonbgyre as ss
to
o n
spellt he ,llace of
cabbage D i
Paynter, the regularly nominated Van Buren candidate for
booby .Kiskusli:Thcti !
a„ vv confoundedhere.
upon a down east editor exclaims :—" With such legislators
how can the citizens hope to save their bacon!"
Oartioart Piticat..--If any one doubts for a moment that
the schoolmaster is abroad among us in the States. let him
quietly peruse the following advertisement copied, versa et lit..
from the original, placed in a conspieuous situation on.the deck
of a steam-boat on Lake George ---"Sicks-livin live Rattail
Snaix kecht on Tung Wonting, 'adtnittuns sicks Punts a Byte.
,--Childring half pryce.—P.S. These ere snaix has got their
teethe in, but thaa wont bight no boddy.—p.s. The sed
snaix
is fur sayle." The gentleman owner of these sicks snais should
sell them as soon as possible, and get into congress on the Van
Buren interest, side by side with the kab-bitch candidate.
AN INDIAN Pitirisopnea.—Old Joe Soctiasin was. sailing
down the Penobscot in his canoe, last inOnth, with a brother In-
dian whose leg was so deformed as to be almost useless, when,
nisinana<rement the frail barque upset;
by someand Joe
Socbasin deliberately swam ashore, pushing his capsized canoe
before him, and leaving his venerable companion- to a .watery
grave. When remonstrated with for such unfeeling negleetof
his friend, he replied, " Best way; old crooked logs oen't'iwim-
mim..c, let um dead."
THE M A ms!—The Chicago American thus congratulates its
readers upon an anticipated early arrival of the mails:—
" POSTSCRIPT. Important.—By a foot passenger from
the south, we learn that the long-expected mail may be looked
for in the course of next week."
CORRECTING THE PRESS!—We copy the following mode of
correcting the Press from a recent nuinberoft he
fe Bostone n Courier:
—" Mr. Houpt, of the
'Tremont
the Boston theatre,
Past of e vls+ t
imself
aggrieved by some remarks in s erday,
n the editor, Mr. G.
i
called in the course of the forenoon (
Greene, and behaved in so insolent a manner as to induce Mr „
into the street. Ihe noise of
Greene to kick him down stairs
the scuffle attracted some notice from the neighbours, and the
discomfited actor was most terribly laughed at, besides being
somewhat hurt by the sudden manner in which he came down
stairs."
Pu:sczca rarr.—A lways live up to an engagement. If you
premise to cut your throat by a certain time, do it.--Boston
Gala.ry.—The salary was, no doubt, angry when it penned the
above. Some one promised to be there and didn't comp.--
Slioneataks Colunibiaa.

• EAST INDIES. CAPE OF GOOD ROPE, &e.
finds, Lowthian, (258) fm Bombay, with 1113 bts 74 hf his cotton,
Fergusoo, joiner & co-1 bx curiosities, Ikg mangos pickles, J Bibby
and tO-534' bits pepper; 135 Cs cassia, T.W Smith & cs preserved
gittgeT.-3 small cs Ica, 2 pots China preserves, 2 small kegs succades,
said Master—P Dk
Reliance; (605) Brown, fm Bombay, with 638 bgs pepper, 500 hgs
sunr, 175 b 15.44 hf hls cotton, 25 es gum arabic, Nicol, Duckworth
co-285 .hgs turmeric, chelly, 194 hgs galls, 50 cs black lead,
Fotbes, Forbes and co-84 psi teak timber, Acraman and Stitt-3 chts.
16 bxs bees' wax, Daniell Sz Dickinson-45 bgs senna, 110 chts cassia,
2469 blis 18i lif cotton, 170
es silk, Ferguson, Miller and co-4:26 hls
cotton, 3-18 hga pepper, 100 cassia, 20 cs gum benjamin, cs dam-
phire„ 232 bgs turmeric, 146 bgs nux vomica, 5 pkgs presents, Order--
-P Dk WEST INDIES •
AND MADEIRA.
Berbice, (282) Grayson, fm Berbice, with 36 lids 16 tcs sugar, J
Dods'on-31 lids do, It Semple and co-266 hds 29 tcs do,
tankthwaite and co-75 lids do, Baring Bros and co-10 hds do, 1 ln-
dlasses, N Waterhouse and Son-34 hales cotton, J Crossthwaite co-
-27 do, Baring Bros and co-2 tcs coffee, J Mure-2 bags do, Order-4-
-W Dk
SOUTH AMERICA.
Guillelmo, (118) Godfrey, fm Monte,Video, with 700 dry o .and
hides, 8 bls wool, Rathbone Bros and co-67 srns tallow, 8000 horns,
7 t bones, Delisle, Janvrin and co-23 his dry 8; 67 salted hdrse hides,
2073 salted o and c hides, 31 bls horse hair, 6 hales wool, 8 bales sheep
skins, 1 cse bows and arrows, 2 prels conts unkn, Order—W Dk