The Liverpool Standard and General Commercial Advertiser.
Liverpool, Merseyside, England, 1836-08-12 00:00:00

THE LADIES' PETITION.

The Es,ex Herald suggests for the adontiOn of We ladies in
that county, the subjoined petition to parliament :
,The humble. petition of certain single ladies in the county of
Essex., who are dying to obtain lin:A:ands, showetil !
"That your Petitioners have lately seen with deep regret the
lamentable extent to which celibacy prevails among the youPg,.
men of Great Britain, from which it es'ident th'at that dialger-
Ants principle of popery is making v.;.st progress in tee land—a
principle fraught with danger to church clerks, as it reduces the
amount of marriage fees, and at the same time deprives your.
petitioners of the dignity of matrons and all the
.cowforts of
double bleisedness.

"That -your petitioners are convinced old bachelorism sours
the temper, promotes avarice, lengthens the face, sharpens the
Rose, and prevents longcvth ; and though it thus swells th
amount of probate duty, the catty death of a bachelor dues not.
benefit the state so much as a largo family of (tidal en Wearing
taxed articles of clothing and eating food which has &attributed
in the shape of duty to his Majesty's exchequer.
" That in consequence of the prevalence of the above monkish,
principle, several of your petitioners have already reached the
aTe of 35 years, without receiving an offer a marriage, although
they are told they are by no means behind their countr}women
in those qualities which writild render comfortable the house-
hold hearth; and in order, therefore, to bring the timnairied
male portion of society back to their sober sepses,' and
prevent eniirmous expense to counties for coroner's charges,
your petitioners pray that your honourable house would
be
pleased to pass a bill enacting that every man found titonarried
after the age of 26, without showing reasonable cause to a jury
of single ladies, shall be immediately banished to 'lfio Man's
Land," and branded on the forehead with tirc, letter 'B.'
"And your petitioners as in drat bound will ever pray, Sc.
These petitions, when duly signed, May be sent under cover.
to Mr.. Grantley Berkeley, for as member was So.
anxious to obtain the introduction of the ladies to the House of
Commons, surely he will labour to procure theta seats in the
temple of Hymen.
COMM

OF Thursday 4 hiintl
cart was borroa
SAGACITY ANTI F
L_b.nE
~
the
neighbour
of a Laker in this town to
convey some ya re to a steam-boat, with .which. a person was
dose, the property ofbaker, seeing a stran,zer
shortly afterwards proceeding
theup Q ut'eu-sstm.et„ whe4n, a New-
foundland iii
possession of his master's cart, went up, compelled him to stop,
,end very soon to quit his hold. The dry),. placed himself be-
tween the shafts, andti tliteatened ace to any one who:
dated to interfere.wihim. After. some time fruitlessly spent,
in endeavouring to b?at away the unlooked-for usurper, the
effect of it piece of beef was tried by an olilfging hi:teller, but
.the dog would nei; lief be thr.eattiseir, beaten, cii,j;,icd,'
nor bribed to quit his Master's vehicle. The porter, finding
in-
effoctual all attempts to regain possession or the cart, iv?s pro-
ceeditif.r., to .take out the baggage, but in this be was 4s furiously
resifted as in his.former.encounters with the having
iairiy bafled all, attempts to conquer Fins, couched himself be-.
tween the :wheels until his master could be brought, who was of
necessity procured from a distance of tWo.or :three itreets, and;
to him the faithful animal delivered up possession- with evitif.:ut
satisfactiott--Lincain Gazelle.