The Liverpool Standard and General Commercial Advertiser.
Liverpool, Merseyside, England, 1841-08-20 00:00:00

TRADE GENERALLY

BEING in such a dreadful state, has brought all Fancy
Business almost to a stand, consequently, the Manufac-
turers of Fancy Articles have been forcing sales of their very
best and most expensive Stock at nearly half-price, for low-
priced Goods there has been some sales, but for supertnr
4escriptions next to none. A visit to Londoir at the present
crisis, has enabled the Proprietor of Glasgow House to pur-
chase so as to offer to his kind patrons greater bargains than
have ever yet been made even at Glasgow House, which is
NOW SELLING OFF
The STOCK of a CELEBRATED MANUFACTURER,
In Ladies' and Gentlemen's
PORTABLE DESKS, DRESSING CASES, WORK-

BOXES, TEA CHESTS, &c. &c.
The above being very superior London articles, so favour-
able an opportunity may not easily occur of obtaining best
Articles at the low price of medium qualities.
OBSERVE, THE ADDRESS IS

GLASGOW HOUSE,-53, CHURCH-STREET.
N.B.—A fresh arrival of Papier Machee Hand Screens
and Inkstands, Traveller's Carpet Bags, at one-third less
than the usual prices.

WRITING, BOOKKEEPING, &c,

/I R. THONIPSON., PRIVATE TEACHER, enables
ADULTS to acquire a good, free, and expeditious
style of WRITING, in a few Lessons of one hour each, at
his ESTABLISHMENT, No. 8, Clayton-square, Liver-
pool. _ _ _

BOOKKEEPING by Double Entry, SHORTHAND, ARITH-
METIC, and MENTAL CALCULATION taught as usual.

For Cards of Terms, &c., apply as above, where a CIR-
CULATING LIBRARY is kept, containing the latest
Popular Works.

RHODES' NEWLY-INVENTED
COPYING MACHINE.

Quarto
Large Quarto
Folio

£2 10 0
2 15 0
4 10 0
Sold only by BENJ. SMITH,
TER AND STATIONER,
74, SOUTII CASTLE-STREET.
A liberal Discount to Exporters.
THE SELF-ACTING LETTER CLIP OR FILE.
MANIFOLD WRITERS at a considerable reductiom iu

PRIM

price.
MILNER'S FIRE-PROOF BOXES

To MERC H A NTS . BANKERS, & MANUFACTURERS.
VOORSANGER'S newly-invented METALLIC EM-
BOSSED PENS possess the flexibility of the Quill,
with the preservation of elasticity to a much greater degree
than any hitherto offered to the Public. They are so re-
markable for producing beauty and clearness in writing, as to
render them distinguished in numerous public offices, which
is the greatest testimony of their excellence.

fin Beware of counterfeits. Each genuine Pen is marked
" Voorsanger, warranted."
The Public is hereby cautioned not to purchase Pens of
Hawkers for Voorsanger's, as no Hawker is supplied with
the above.

May be had of LACE and ADDISON, Standard-office, and
all other Stationers and dealers in such articles.

CRICKET MATCH EXTRAORDINARY BETWEEN THE
GREENWICH AND CHELSEA PENSIONERS.—This novel
match between the one-arm and one-leg pensioners came off
on Monday and Tuesday, at Hall's cricket ground, Camber-
well, and excited much interest and mirth from the various
falls which occurred during the play. The charge of admit-
tance to the ground was 6d., and on Monday there were full
2000 present, It was obvious from the first that the Chelsea
veterans, being much older, and at the same time mostly
men who had lost a leg, would have no chance against the
Greenwich tars. The result of the match thoroughly justi-
fied this conclusion, the Chelsea pensioners scoring only 19
runs, while the Greenwich tars got 176. The best of feeling
and good fellowship pervaded both parties throughout, and
it was not the least interesting part to witness the old boys
dine together, reminding us in its truest sense of a " United
Service Club." They had a good luncheon of bread, cheese,
and porter before they commenced play, and for dinner,
quarters of lamb, and roast and boiled beef in profusion.
On their departure they each had a noggin to drink the
Queen's health, and lOs in cash for their two days' exertions,
besides their free passage to and fro. It is 16 years since a
similar match took place between the two institutions, which
was played in Montpelier-gardens, Blackheath, when the
Greenwich heroes come off victorious.

A POSSIBILITY.—" if ever I die," said an old maid the
other day, " I believe I shall be carried off with an affection
of the heart."

On the shutters of a house in Duke-street, Lincoln's Inn-
fields, is a paper fixed, on which is written "Empty. No-
body hear."

EXPEDITIOUS.—Letters are now brought to New York
from Calcutta in eight weeks—a distance nearly half round
the globe. With the same speed, a man would travel round
the earth in sixteen weeks. This is a striking evidence of the
march of improvement in the present age.
Certain great works should be read frequently, and at diffe-
rent periods of life, to be thoroughly felt and understood.
A policeman, in tendering evidence in one of the London
police-offices on.. Saturday, said that the prisoner was using
" obscene language." On being pressed for his definition of
obscenity of expression, he replied that the defendant waa
" damning the police."

COURTING SCENE.—" Jonathan, did you read that are
story about the man as was hugged to death by the bear?"
" Guess I did. Sewk,., ,anti it did Male inn feel so bad."
" Why, how did you feel, Jonathan ?" " Kind'er sorter
as if I'd like to hug you eenamost to death, tew, you tarnal,
nice, plump, elegant little critter, you, Sewke." " 0, la!
Go away, you—Jonathan."—American paper.
A SOLD MINE AND BETTER.—IL is said that there is a
coal formation near Lowell. If so, what a prize !—New
York Herald.

The editor of the New York Baptist Register says he
istened to a discourse a flaw Sabbaths since from Father
EI arvey, now in the 107th year of his age.
Whoever is found in bed after seven o'clock, from May
:ill Michaelmas, cannot in any conscience expect to be free
ron.i some ailment or other, dependent on relaxed nerves,
stuffed lungs, disordered bile, or impaired digestion.
It is a curious fact, that in the times of the commonwealth
the Jews presented a petition to Cromwell, praying him to
grant them St. Paul's Cathedral for a synagogue.
The editor of the American Traveller thinks the best snuff
in the world is a snuff of the morning air.
" Be content with what you have," as the rat said to the
trap, when he left his tail in it.
TAicn CAnE.—When travelling, never tell how much
money you have in your pockets ; if you do, it won't be there

The following matrimonial advertisement appeared in a
Concord (N. H.) paper:—" Whereas I, Daniel Clay, through

nisrepresentation, v.vas induced to put my wife, Rhoda, in
:he papers ; now beg leave to inform the public that I have
sgaiu taken her to wife, after settling all our domestic broils
n an amicable manner ; so that every thing as usual goes on
ike clock work."

Men of elevated mind fall down before merit ; ordinary
men fall down before success. With the latter, success
justifies every thing ; with the former, success itself regaires
to be justified.
The power of the journalist, says the New monthly Maga-
zine, is immense : experience enables us to assert confidently,
that twenty thousand addresses, printed separately, and
circulated with the most energetic diligence, would not pro-
duce the effect of one advertisement.

" Circumstances alter cases," as the cat said when she
jumped on the printer's case.—" I shall not die unheard,"
as the pig said when the butcher stuck him.

A new bass singer has lately appeared at New Orleans,
who sings so remarkably deep that it takes nine Kentucky
lawyers to understand a single bar.

Sir 'Walter Scott was under the necessity of fitting out his
eldest son as a cavalry officer. When the bill was' brought
to him, he observed to the expectant schneider, " It takes
nine tailors to make a man, but only one to ruin him."
In this world of hatred and contention, the love even of a
dog is worth living for.
We blame an Armenian for his want of submission to
Divine sovereignty ; yet, let a shower fall on a new suit of
clothes, and we cannot submit ourselves.
The learned and caustic Bishop Warburton said, "it is

rong to define man to be a reasoning animal ; all that we
.;an predicate of him is, that he is an animal capable of
reasoning." We every day meet with facts confirming the
truth of this humiliating remark.—Boston Mel.. Journal.

We saw a funny incident at the Market House meeting on
Saturday night. " The eyes have it," bawled a drunken
Locofoco, when a vote was taken. "The nose has it," re-
torted a big Whig, taking the unfortunate Loco by the fea-
ture indicated.—Louisville Journal.

RETORT COURTEOI7S.—A Russian lady being engaged to
dinner with M. de Talleyrand, at that time Niinister for
Foreign Affairs, was detained a full hour by some unexpected
accident. The famished guests grumbled, and looked at
their watches. On the lady's entrance, one of the company
observed to his neighbour in Greek, " When a woman is
neither young itor handsome, she ought to arrive betimes."
The lady, turning round sharply, accosted the satirist in the
same language, " When a woman," says she, " has the mis-
fortune to dine with savages, she always arrives too soon."
A GERMAN DINNER—TABLE D'HaTE.—First came the
soup, very like barley broth, supposing rice instead of bar-
ley, and then the beef which had been boiled in it, of course,
very insipid. It reminded me of the patent Pimlico bread I
once tasted, when as poor George said, they had extracted all
the spirit and left nothing behind but the corpse of a loaf.
I was obliged to leave it on my plate, where, as it got cold,
it turned almost as white as a piece of wood. But you would
have admired the dexterity of the waiters. One of them
brought a large pile of clean plates, holding one between
each finger, and dealt them out as if they had been cards.
The worst is, the plates and dishes are all stone-cold ; and,
as instead of a bill of fare, every course is put on the table
to show what you are to expect, and is then taken off again
to be carved, the hottest of their dinners is only like a hasty
attempt in warm weather at a collation. But what most sur-
prised me was the order of the eatables, so different to any
established by Mrs. Glasse or Mrs. Rundell. After the
soup, &c., came in a monstrous dish of asparagus, with
a sauce made of oiled butter and hard boiled-eggs. Next
appeared a capon and salad, then a very sweet pudding.
and then some very sour krout. The aext dish that went
its round, like a novel in a circulating library. was of
very small, very waxy kidney potatoes, (Frank called
them " Murphy's thumbs,") and then followed some
unknown vegetable, with a very unpleasant smell, ina brown
sauce, looking, according to Frank, like "sailors
stewed in tar." Next we had salmon andtPeaie"
tr jelly,
and cold ; and last, and certainly not lead,
piece of roast veal. My brother, great'o solid
the wrong
" Egad! Kate," he whispered, " I have
every-
thing, was amused at this putting t;:co•ari
suppose to digest it properly
eaten
nre the horse.
end of my dinner first; and I sT I
came iii for
m) own
I must stand on my head." Indeed,d
a pickled walnut was so
sweet, that the mere surprise share of novelties ; for it se.
enough, and especially as the
my plate. I was provokedert seemeniade me return it hastily to
o notice it. " Just like them
Londoner thought Parrdphe ; they arn't even up to pickled
Germans, ma'ara,
followed was worse ; for after helping ~ Butwalnuts! preserved plums, but proved to
spluttered one out again without any ceremony,
calling be sour, he, loud enough for the whole room to hear him,
ou". by jingo !" As you may suppose, I wade
looked like
,h,ipmiseeklifedtobuwiiiiet.
up my mind to dine no more at a table d'hote.—HoNi Grp
he Rhine,
t