The Liverpool Standard and General Commercial Advertiser.
Liverpool, Merseyside, England, 1839-01-11 00:00:00

commence operations." Something like this is the way to do
the business. If the required satisfaction is not given, then
it must be " blaze away, boys." This would make the Ameri-
cans wince; they would then give satisfaction and repara-
tion without any "guessing" and "calculating" about the
matter. They would haul down their• fustian in double quick
time. England has been playing too long with these villains;
it must be solid work, powder and ball being the chief com-
ponent parts.
I hope soon to see, instead of her Majesty taking an airing
in Windsor Park, accompanied by her pet Lamb, she may
be seen in Hyde Park, reviewing her troops, accompanied
by England's Lion. It is high time that all sheepish con-
nections should be done away with !
In conclusion, I should like to ask bow long is Canada to
be invaded by American pirates. No sooner is one invasion
crushed, than another has to be met; the lives of the gallant
and loyal inhabitants are threatened daily: How many of
these villains have been punished ? Only two. Whilst hun-
dreds of the renegades are discharged, sent over the lines, to
again re-commence their invasions. When a batch of these
brigands are caught, the papers commence their sytnpa-
thisine• speeches; American Generals carry long petitions to
the British officers, to spare the lives of the lawless scoun-
drels, and this, with all the bare-faced impudence imagina-
ble. A happy and prosperous people are thus persecuted
daily and hourly. I hear much said about the miserable
condition of the Canadians; now, if there is a happy race
under Heaven, it is the French Canadians; they have little
or NO tares to pay ; about un eighth of what is paid in the States,
plenty of food, clothing, and fuel, and under Heaven what
else do they want ? I have floated down the majestic St.
Lawrence, and viewed with delight the beautiful villages,
tasteful cottages, and splendid farms of the Canadians ; from
the lake down to Quebec it is one continued line of beauteous
villages and magnificent houses. Enter these houses, and
their lovely exterior; tell you what to expect in the interior
—you are nut mistaken in your thoughts; the cottages are
comfortable, neat, and well furnished inside. The Canadians
are to be seen with their straw hats, neatly and cleanly
dressed, blooming in health and prosperity. The pretty girls,
happy children, and contented parents, strike the strangers
with admiration and delight. The little French songs, the
evening hymns, or light guitar breathe upon your ears as
you approach their dwellings; fatuity and happiness reigns
within—comfort and prosperity surrounds you on all sides;
but who are the monsters to break this peace? Who are the
villains to tempt the peaceful cottagers to rebellion ? And
who are the black devils of the darkest dye to crush this hap-
piness ? A way with them,
"Down, down, to Hell,
And say I sent thee thither."
Sorry would I be, to see Canada in other hands than the
English ; then this peaceful happiness—this comfort and
prosperity, would vanish like a dream.
"And like the baseless fabric of a vision,
Leave not a wreck behind."
I have the honour to be a native of Montreal, in the province
of Lower Canada, and know the true state of my Canadian
fellow•countrvmeu. Upon the honour of a gentleman, and the
word of a Briton, there is not a happier, more prosperous,
and contented people under Heaven, than the British and
French Canadians. I glory in the noble manner my coun-
trymen marched forward, and protected with their hearts
blood the standard of their country, unsullied, untarnished,
and undefiled.

Hoping to be excused for taking up so much of your ‘,.a.
luable tune and paper,
I have the honour to remain, yours, &c.
S. W. B.

January 7th, 1839.

MR. PETER PUNCTILIO,
THE GENTLEMAN IN BLACK.

(CONTINUED FROM OCR LAST.)
Punctually as the clock was striking four the Highflyer
fast coach drew up at the Bell Hotel, and deposited at the
door a particularly prim and pussy little gentleman, habited
in a new suit of black. There was a peculiar precision in
his air, a starch spruceness about his white cravat, and a
• fastidious formality displayed in the tie thereof, coupled with
a feverish anxiety respecting the safe delivery of the sundry
articles which constituted his luggage, which would have in-
dicated to any one in the least acquainted with the character
of Mr. Peter Punctilio, that this was no less a person than
that gentleman himself.
At length he entered the hotel, and, looking at the clock
over the mantel-piece of the coffee-room, exclaimed, " Seven
minutes and a half past four, eh ? That will do ! It wants,
then, exactly one quarter of an hour and thirty seconds to
the time of my appointment with Mr. Solid. Fifteen minutes
and a half. Let me see! that will just allow me five minutes
to open my parcels; seven do. to smarten myself up a bit ;
and the remaining three and the odd seconds to find my way
to the apartments of Mr. S. But, let me have a peep at my-
self, and see how I look in my new suit of black."
Mr. Punctilio went towards the glass, and began admiring
himself with evident self-satisfaction.
" Fla !" continued he, elevating his shirt collars, and re-
suscitating his brutus. " Most sedate and respectable, I
flatter myself. Black certainly does become me amazingly—
gives such a pensive and interesting tone to the features.
Yes; not particular handsome, but irresistibly pleasing."
Leaving Mr. Peter Punctilio thus pleasantly engaged in
the contemplation of his charms, we will take the opportunity
of saying a few words relative to the history of the black suit,
which appeared to give him so much inward delight.
To a roan of Mr. Peter Punctilio's regular habits a love
affair was a roost important business ; and he naturally
wished to appear before the lady to whom he was about to
plight his troth, to the very best possible advantage; conse-
quently he sent for his tailor in order to consult him as to the
best means of so doing. Ile told him he was about to pay
his addresses to a beautiful and delicate-minded damsel, and
desired such habiliments as would be likely to make the lady
look with favour upon his suit. The taste, however, of the
artist and our hero did anything but coincide. Snip, of
course, was for decking him out in all the colours of the
rainbow ; but Peter Punctilio, as that gentleman himself'
said, wasn't the man to allow himself to be made a harlequin
of. No; he preferred something sedate and respectable. and
so decided upon having a genteel and sober suit of black.
Whether Mr. Peter Punctilio did right or not the sequel
will show.
Now it so happened that a few minutes bofore the arrival
of the above gentleman in black, a lady of the name of Hol-
lyhock had been thrown out of her photon and her senses at
one and the same time, a short distance from the Bell, and
had consequently been brought to that hotel until such time
as she could be removed to her own house, which was situate
about a mile out of Cheltenham. A messenger had of course
been instantly despatched to the nearest surgeon for his im-
mediate attendance, but as yet he had not made his appear-
ance.
Such was the state of affairs, when the landlady, not a
little alarmed at the dilatoiluess of the Doctor, rang the bell,
and ordered the chambermaid to go below, and see if Mr.
Potio❑ had arrived.
The lady of the bedchamber, who rejoiced i❑ the name of
Sally, went about the bidding, grumbling that she wished
they would take their sick people to any place but there, for
they never give one nothiog but a great deal of trouble; and
that if they did happen to give up the ghost, why, drat 'em!
they never thought about re►nembering the chambermaid.
'Thus went Sally grumhiing about the house, until she
reached the coffee-room, where the figure of Mr. Peter
Punctilio, dressed all in black, no sooner caught her eye,
than she exclaimed, " A Gentleman iu black. Oh, tnis
roust be the doctor, surely. I'm blest if he doesn't look just
like one of his own black doses animated!—l beg your par-
don, Sir," said she, addressing the Gentleman. " but 1 be-
lieve you've come to see a Lady in this hotel ?"
" Most certainly, my dear," responded Mr. P.; " that is
the interesting object of my visit."
" All, Sir!' returned Sally, " the poor thing has been
anxiously expecting you."
" She has, has she ?" exclaimed he, not a little delighted
at the impatience on the part of one whom he believed to be
his destined bride. " No doubt," he• added iu an under tone,
`• she has heard of my amiable qualities from some quarter
or other."
"'The dear creatur' has been dreadfully upset, I can assure
you, Sir," continued Sally, alluding to the capsize of Miss
Holls hock.
" breadfully upset, has she repeated Mr. Punctilio.
"'',h'" subjoined he in a low voice ; "it's the way with all
the women; they always are upset directly they hear any
thing about me. Completely throw❑ out, 1-dame say, now,
continued he, addressing himself to Sally.
" You may say that, too," replied the maid.
head over heels, and no mistake !"
" Amiable susceptibility," thought Mr. Punctilio. "But,
said he, she won't be the first fair damsel I've cut up, by a
great many."
" Cut up!" exclaimed the horror-stricken Sally.
you intends to operate upon the poor thing, then ?''
" Operate upon her ?" responded the Gentleman i❑ black.
" Of course I do ; upon her heart."
" Intends to operate upon her heart !" ejaculated the maid,
" Did I ever hear the likes? Oh, she's booked, I see. But
you don't mean to say you'll ever hate the couscieuce to do
it ?"

" Regularly

" Wha

" Conscience!" echoed Mr. I'. "bless you, her's won't
be the first fair bosom I've penetrated in my t!ine!"
" He's a-goiog to penetrate her bosom, too. The inhuman
wretch!"
" I've made some havoc among the members of the fair
sex before now, I can tell you."
"The members ! He means her arms and lees ! The
nasty beast! I declare I'm of a tremble 11 hile I ieniain near
the horrid brute !"
"Although, I dare say, you wouldn't think it, to look at
me:" said our hero.

" Indeed, but I would, though. I never saw such a
slaughtering countenance in all my horn days afore !"
"It is rather a killing one, I believe," said the sell-satis-
fied Mr. Punctilio. -

" You looks lancets, that you does !"
" Why, truly, I have always been allowed to have a regu.
lar piercing eye of my own."
" But, while you're a running on here, you forget all aboul
the sufferings of the poor young Lady )ou'ye come to see
Sir."

" sufferings ! You !lure!) do not mean to say she is so far
gone as all that ?"
" But l does, though ! La! bless you ! the dear creature's

in a state of perfect agony!"
" Charming anxiety said he to himself. " But, come,
let me haste to relieve the poor thing's torments!"
" Ah, do, Sit !" replied Sally ; " you'll find her eagerly
expecting you up stairs in bed."
" Find her where ?" blurted out the astonished Mr. Punc-
tilio.

Why, in bed, to be sure! Where else did you expect to
find her, I should like to know ?"

"Anywhere else but there, certainly! Egad!" added Mr.
P. aside, "a pretty wife she'll make me if she's in the habit

- . -
of receiving the first visits of Gentlemen in bed.'
" Well, hang me!" said Sally, " if 3-ou aiu't the rummest
Doctor 1 ever seed, if you object to visiting a lady in bed!"
"Doctor!" cried the Gentleman in black. " What do you
wean by that? Don't Doctor me, if you please!"
"What! do you intend to say you haven't come here to
physic poor Miss Hollyhock ?"
"Confound Miss Hollyhock!" ejaculated the irate Mr.
Punctilio; "what's Miss Hollyhock to me? No! I came
here to pay my attentions to a beautiful young lady residing
in this hotel."
"Well, here is a pretty kettle of fish!" exclaimed Sally.
"Hows'ever, it was quite nat'ral, you know; for seeing ton
dressed all in black, I in course took you for one of them phy-
sicianers."

" 'r ook me for the devil!" cried the enraged Mr Punctilio.
" But, come, show me at once to the apartments of Mr. Solid."
" What, then, you've come here to marry the ward of that
Gentleman, I suppose, Sir? Well, here's a precious disco-
'very !" added Sally aside : " I'm blest if lie a'n't conic after

the very young lady as Mr. Frank Forage is a-keeping com-
pany with. I'll play a trick with him send him up to
Mr. Forage's room, and he'll soon settle his business with a
vengeance. If you goes up to No. 42, on the third landing,
Sir," she continued, addressing herself to Mr. Punctilio,
" you'll meet with some one who'll give you every information
about the party you want."
" No. 42, on the third lauding, eh ? Sure you're right, are
you ? And, egad, I must make the best of my way, fur I have
no time to spare, I tee," said he. looking at his watch. " Mis-
take me for a Doctor—a Doctor, indeed l—a fellow that al-

ways dresses in black, to be continually in mourning for the
number of people be sends to their graves."
And so saying, Mr. Peter Punctilio bounced out of the
room, not a little annoyed to think that his new suit of black
had met with so bad a reception.
" Ah, there you goes, old gentleman," said Sally, when
she had lost sight of the skirts of his coat, " and a prrcious
game Mr. Forage will have when he finds ott who he's got
hold on. Oh, he's a fine funny fellow, Mr. Frank Forage,
that he is ! Not that he's exactly the kind of a young man,
though, that I should like for a husband. No. 'Whenever 1
marry, what a love of a fellow, as the song will have,
to be sure !"

And she bent her way back to the apartment of Miss Ho
lyhock, singing as she went
THE MAIDEN'S CHOICE.'

Whenever I marry, the man that has me,
What a love of a fellow, od's bobs ! he shall be !
In the first place, the darling shall have, I declare,
A head of the lovliest curling black hair;
And as for his eves, goodness ! shant they be bright !
Yes ! just like two stars on a midsummer's night :
And his nose—let me see—Oh ! his nose shall resemble
,The fine-looking acquiline one of John Kemble ;
While his lips—ay, his lips! that important sweet part,
So red, shall seem tinged with the warmth of his heart ;
And through them, whenever a smile makes them curl,
Shall gleam two white rows of the choicest of pearls.
Nay ! he shall be form'd on Adonis's plan,
And, to sum up the whole, quite a love of a man !
And now, having told you the form of my beau,
Suppose I just take a glance round ere I go,
And see if I can in this circle discover
The handsome young fellow I'd like for a lover.
Ah ! yonder smile curling black hair I descry—
But then, mercy me ! he's a cast in the eye.
But see! there are eyes! Oh, an't they a fine pair !
But then, lackaday ! he's got carroty hair.
Look, though—there's hair and eyes, with a nose well enough,
But then, la ! that horrible fellow takes snuff.
See there !—but what teeth ! Oh, you'll never do—
Nor you, sir—nor you, sir—nor you, sir—nor you !•
In fact, I'm afraid, let me do all I can,
I must wait a long time for my love of a man.
Let us now return to our friend Frank Forage. On leav-
ing the apartment of his lady-love, the sprightly punster
made the best of his way to the office of the Cheltenham Chro-
nicle and having deposited his mite of mirth in the editorial
box of that journal, returned with all speed to his attic in
the Bell Hotel, when what was his surprise to find a letter
bearing his address lying upon his table, and containing a
small slip of paper commencing, " Victoria, by the grace of
God of the United Kingdom or Great Britain and Ireland
Queen, Defender of the Faith, to Frank Forage, greeting
—" Need we inform the reader it was a—writ!
" Egad 1" said the incorrigible Frank, " it's astonishing
how formidable an instillment can be connected out of such
simple materials as the quill of the goose and the skin of the
sheep. Here I ain, poor devil! served with what these ras-
cally attorneys call a 'meow process,—and a particularly mean
process it is most assuredly."
However, set a thief to catch a thief, says the old adage,
and, in conformity with the reverend maxim, our jocose
friend despatched an envoy for the immediate attendance of
.one of the profession, to consult him as to the best means
of resisting (or rather putting off. until such time as he could
arrange his marriage with the fair Cecelia) this most cour-
teous and Duval-like attack on your money or your liberty.
Our lively friend Frank was anxiously expecting a visit
from his legal adviser, when Al r. Peter Punctilio, following
the roguish directions of Miss Sally, tapped at the door of
Mr. Forage's apartment. Frank no sooner saw the sombre
suit of Mr. Punctilio than he inwardly exclaimed,
A gentleman in black—this must be the very man. " I be-
lieve, Sir," said he to Mr. Punctilio, "you have come about
this suit."

Now, unfortunately for Mr. Peter Punctilio, the term
used by Mr. Frank Forage was a very ambiguous one, so
that while our lively friend was alluding to one kind of suit,
our sombre friend naturally imagined his interrogation to re-
fer to another, and accordingly grew rather poetical, and
said,

" Certainly Sir, as Othello says, von know, 'lt is the
cause—upon my soul it is the cause.'
"True," replied Frank, taking the word cause in a legal
sense, of course;" but the worst is, these d—d causes are
so intimately connected with your effects, the one is sure to
go with the other—ha! ha! ha! Not so coarse that, I'm
thinking►, eh, old fellow?"

Mr. Peter Punctilio was astonished; he could not under
stand the juke, and muttered to himself, " Very strange
What can he wean, I wonder?"

" But you are tired, Sir, no doubt; pray be seated," said
Frank, offering the gentleman in black a chair, of which
he had no sooner availed himself than the eternal punster
added, " case of a-rest, as they say in the law. Come I've
heard worse than that in my time."
The supposed limb of that profession laughed—not at the
joke, because his companion did.
"Touching the present business," continued the facetious
Mr. Forage, " I believe you are aware how far matters have
gone already."
" Why, it I mistake not," returned Mr. Punctilio, "there
is an attachment at present existing."
" Ah! he means the writ of attachment," returned Frank
in an under tone.—" Perfectly right, Sir. Now, I presume,
the first step you intend to take will be to enter an appear-
ance."
" Enter an appearance!—that is, make my debut before
the Lady," said the Gentleman in black aside, " Certainly,
Sir," he added, addressing the punster, " the first thing I
shall do will be to enter an appearance,—and," thought he,
as he took a glance at his habiliments, " a very imposing ap-
pearance I shall make when I do enter."
" Ay," responded Frank, " and then, I suppose, will come
the declaration."
Mr. Punctilio intimated by a nod of the head that such
was the course he intended to adopt.
" And after the declaration," continued Mr. Forage, " I
presume you will then go on to plead; but for that," added
he, " I suppose you will require some council?"
" Sir," replied Mr. Punctilio, " I urn always happy to
have counsel upon any subject. Have you any to offer?"
" 'Why, Sir, I think now it would materially assist the case,
if you could manage to get Wilde."
" Get wild ! Oh, he means throw in a bit of passion,"
_ .

thought Mr. Punctilio. "'Truly, Sir," said he " that, I have
no doubt, Would be a grand point."
" But that rests entirely with you. And then, Sir, having

pleaded, I suppose, if there be n; demurrer, you will procee
to join."
"Such is certainly my intention."
"And having joined, the issue will come as a matter o
course."
"The issue:" exclaimed the astonished Mr. Punctilio,
shocked at the mere mention of such subject.
"And about what time" continued Mr. Forage, "after
joining will it be before we shall have the issue, do yuu iwu
giney"

Why the usual time, I suppose," replied the perplexed
Mr. Punctilio.
"The usual time!—ay ; but, unfortunately, lam so igno-
rant upon these matters, that, hang me ! if 1 know what is
the usual time in such cases."
"Then, Sir, all that I can say is," replied the gentleman
in black rather warmly, " that you are one of the most inno-
cent beings for your time of life that I ever met with "
"That may be, Sir; hutiyou see I want particularly to
know the exact time—some few weeks, I believe, is it not?"
"Some few weeks !" blurted out the bewildered gentle•
man. " Well, d— me, if he isn't the veriest nincompoop I
ever heard of! Some few weeks, indeed !—months you
mean."
"Months!" exclaimed the equally astonished Mr. Fo-
rage, "you surely must be mistaken, Sir, or there must be
a great alteration in the law."

You must be well aware, Sir, that is a law which no ono
-can alter."

" Well, Sir, I submit to your superior judgment," said
Frank; "you, of course, know more about these matters
than I—you must have had some hundreds of issues in your
time."
" I had some hundreds of issues ! What the devil do you
take me for ?"
"Take you for ?" replied Frank; "why, a lawyer, to be
sure."

"A lawyer! —nonsense. I'm no lawyer—no, nor doctor
either."

"The deuce you 're not! Egad! then I've made a slight
mistake, I suppose. However, it was natural; for, seeing
you dressed all in black, I of course mistook you for a limb
of the law."

"Mistook me for the devil!" exclaimed the enraged
Punctilio.

" No, pardon me, Sir," replied Frank, " only for one of
the family. However' Sir, since you are no lawyer, who are
you, and what is your business here?"
" I, Sir, am Mr. Peter Punctilio, of Change-alley, Corn-
hill, and the cause of my visit was to gain some information
respecting Mr. Solid's ward, to whom 1 am about to have
the pleasure of being united."

""The deuce, you are!" thought Frank. "So!—my rival.
eh?" said he to himself. " Egad ! this is better luck than I
anticipated—this is some of Cecilia's doing, to a certainty.
Now, if I can only send him on some fool's errand, that will
occupy him half an hour or so, the maid is mine beyond a
doubt. I hare it, by Jupiter! I'll pack him off to Miss
Hollyhock's, the lady who was pitched out of her phaeton
this morning;—she's just been 'moved to her own house,
and that's a good mile and a half from here at the least."
The idea had no sooner entered the head of our facetious
friend than, turning towards Mr. Punctilio, he said, "It was
perfectly right, Sir. Mr. Solid and his ward were stopping
in ►his hotel until within a few days back; but they have
now removed a short distance out of the town. You will
find them residing at Miss Hollyhock's, Hollyhock Hall,
about three quarters of a mile on the Bath road."
"'Thank you, Sir—Miss Dollymop's, Dollymop Hall, I
think you said I"'

" No, Sir, pardon me—Hollyhock, Hollyhock Hall. Any
person will put you in the way t 6 it."
" Hollyhock—l shall remember—three quarters of a mile
on the Bath road'. Egad! I must lose no time, or I shall
break an appointment for the first time in my life. I have
now only to thank "you for your politeness, and to wish you
a very good morning. " A stupid puppy," he muttered, as
he made a profound bow to the Gentleman and quitted the
room, "to take me for a lawyer—a lawyer, indeed !—a fellow
whose black suit is but the livery of the infernal master he
serves."

Frank Forage burst into a violent fit of laughter—directly
his precise rival had taken his leave, and having cut one joke
at the old Gentleman's expense, hastened to claim the fulfil-
ment of Mr. Solid's engagement.
(To be concluded in our next.)

The Emperor of Austria has issued a decree—" That no
person, male or female, shall be married who cannot read,
write, and cypher, and cast up a common account."
EMIGRATION.—The number of emigrants from Scotland
who arrived at Quebec in 18'29 was 2.613; in ]B3O, 2,450, in
18.31, 5,351; in 1832, 5.550; in 183.3, 4,196; in 1834, 4,591;
in 18.35, 2,127; in 1836. 2,224. The number who arrived at
New York in 1829 was 948; in 1830,1,584; in 1831, 2,078;
in 1833, 3,286.—01iver and Boyd's New Edinburgh Almanac
fur 1839.

LUNAR ItArmsow.—This beautiful atmospherical phe-
nomenon was seen in Leeds and neighbourhood to great ad-
vantage on Thursday night, between half•past eleven and
half-past twelve. The wind was high at the time from the
south-west, the moots, past the full, shone brilliantly; and an
almost imperceptible shower fell, but the air was fully charged
with humidity. We never before saw the bow so well defi-
ned, nor the prismatic colours so perfect.
How TO RUIN A SON.—Let him have his own way;
allow him a free use of money ; suffer him to rove where he
pleases on the Sabbath-day; give him free access to wicked
companions; call bins to no account for his evenings; fur-
nish him with no stated employment. Pursue any one of
these ways and you will experience most marvellous deli-
verance if you have not to mourn over a debased and ruined
child. Thousands have realised the sad result, and gone
mourning to their graves.—Philadelphia Presbyterian.

EXTRAORDINARY ATTEMPT AT MURDER.—On Monday
last, Mr. Hugh Thomas, of Macchynlleth, a solicitor, and
clerk to the Board of Guardians at that place, left at four
o'clock in the afternoon for the purpose, as he stated, of see-
ing Captain Thurston, a magistrate, and chairman of the
board, who lives at Pennel, on business. On the road he
drank to excess, and on arriving at the house, rode through
a narrow passage into the kitchen, and asked for Captain
'Thurston; the coachman replied that he was in the dining-
room, and that he must go to the front door, and took hold
of the horse's head to push it out of the house as well as its
rider. Thomas tuld him that if he did not immediately leave
hold of the bridle he would shoot him. The coachman per-
sisted, and eventually closed the door, and instantly Thomas
fired through the pannel, and the ball lodged in the fleshy
part of the coachman's arm: he then discharged another
pistol without effect, and riding to the dining-room windows,
used most violent language to Captain Thurston. The Cap-
tain fired a gun loaded with shot twice at the horse's legs,
which made it gallop away, and Thomas was 'soon after se-
cured by a constable, after he had beets to two houses for the
purpose of obtaining snore powder. He had five balls in his
pockets. On Tuesday he was taken before a numerous
bench of magistrates, and comtnitted to Dolgelly gaol to
await his trial on this serious charge. He has hitherto borne
the character of a very peaceable inan, and his hatred towards
Captain Thurston is supposed to have originated in his op-
position' to his election, and since corresponding with the
commissioners to obtain his dismissal. .The coachman is in
no danger, and the ball has been e4tracted by Mr. 1.1,.;11, of
AbeFdsvey.