The Sun.
London, England, 1864-01-13 00:00:00

'
tile subjoine little
d introduction of that fat,
rosy-faced personage—one whom Keeley would
look to the very T—ycl e p e d

SKITTLES.
Very hot weather, sir,' he remarked as he proceeded to
rub the closely-cut hair of his head with a piece of lee'
taken out of an oil• skin bag which:he drew from his:pocket;
when the operation was performed, would not take such $
liberty, sir, if the young lady was with you, but the weather
is so hot.'
' It is fine and seasonable weather,' replied the colonel.
Very bad, though, let me tell you, sir, for any one having
a tendency of blood to the head. You have not that inis'
fortune, sir ?
No; I am happy to say I have not.'
And I am happy to hear you say so, sir,' replied his
companion, for there cannot be a more unpleasant aillpg'
as I know well.

I should not have supposed you were an invalid.
`Not supposed I was an invalid I' repeated the little wan!.
' Why, sir, I live, I may say, in death—my existence is
momentary—there's not an office in London would do WI"
ness with me—l'm not insurable at no premium whats°:
ever. I may drop here, there, anywhere, sir; but I bal''
as far as any man can do it, provided for the occasion. 's°4
may see by this, sir (holding out a small note taken freol
his waistcoat pocket), that I'm fully prepared for the event:
There, sir, is my contract with Mr, Gleem, the undertaker
(a first-rate man in his line) to bury me for the suul
of twenty guineas :—hearse, coaches, plumes, mutes, and
find
attendants included, in good style you understand. i:
enclosed in a note, requesting any person who may 1,
—(pointing significantly to his body)—to forward the Bilviv
to the aforesaid Gleem, in Fleet-street. Carriage a m°
re
thirty miles to be an extra payment, for which ii""
provision is made in my will. Not an invalid
you yourself may have, before we part. the melancholy dau
of calling a coach to convey me to my destination.' ,
But, better even than this, we take to be the fcl'
lowing inimitably diverting record of the sayias
and doings, once upon a time, of that preposterolgs
fellow, Mrs. O'Mahony's—

COACITIVIAN JACK.
At length the carriage drew suddenly up and both raellg
simultaneously tapped the window at Father StepVll
back, who instantly let it down.
Beg your reverence's pardon,' said Jack, turning round
and stooping forward towards the window—Moore assioul/15
a similar position—' I jist want to say a word to the Di'e'
tress.'

' Drive on you devil,' shouted Mrs. O'Mahony.'
get
You may talk as much as you like to me when We .
home—but it's growing late, and:the dinner will be spoile"hA
ie
' Fair and easy,' replied Jack, now exhibiting indisput4°
symptoms of drunkenness. Fair and easy goes far jot,
day—and the divil an inch I'll stir, until I get an answer.
' It's only a short question, ma'am, your honour,' inter
posed Moore.
' It's just to know,' said Jack, ' whether Squire MarttOt
grandmother—l dotal mean Tom Pincher, by course,
the real gentleman that's sitting beside you. I want:
know whether his grandmother was a Mac CarthY or
0' Connor:

Mac earthy I' shouted the mistress'—' drive on: rei
That's enough for you, now, I suppose,' cried bit 'f
in triumph—' a real ould Mac Carthy—a Mac Car'.-
More she was.'
It's a d—d lie,' responded Jack, in a fury—'she v/91
O'Connor, and grey'
,granddaughter to Black RoddY'w
Bailout]] üblier—wasn' t my grand father his coachman
oughtn't I to know as well as any one in the world Who
she was ?'
I tell you again, she was better blood,' cried 10orieer
and sure I ought to know how it was, and my grandreat",
her ladyship's waiting-maid.
D'ye mean to tell me,' roared Jack, ' that the
Carthy's are better brought home than the ould O'Connor
of Ballenthubber ?' .

' I do l' shouted Moore.
' Then, by the mortial man I' said Jack, placing the A
and reins under his foot, and proceeding to pull off hi9e,°l4
an operation as quickly performed by his companicltv:ifuji
the mortial man I'll not leave a whole bone in your 0"

you lick-plate, that couldn't drive a wheelbarrow
The two men deliberately tucked up their shirt sie,e-001
preparatory to commencing hostilities ; and Mrs. o'3l'ok
bad her head out of the window, shouting to the foetto ;
who was dead drunk and fast asleep intherumble—hegtile
him, for the love of Heaven, to separate them-4°4:4i
assuming an attitude of attack, Jack shifted his f°°: el
whip and reins fell upon the horses' backs, and awayliked
went at a thundering gallop—the combatants were °brll+
to suspend operations, and hold on by the hes.
,tst
O'Mahony shrieked—but Jack seemed very indign""
the uneasiness and alarm of the persons in the carriage'd
Stay quiet, I tell you,' he cried, addressing them thrott;il
the open window—' stay quiet, I tell you again--it . t
right—it's all right—they'll stop at the ford to "
drink.'
o
Rory, at 'the Mistress's' instigation, endeavoure'•A t
olEte
out—but he no sooner attempted to open the doer, " 01.
Jack, thrusting his arm through the open windoW?
C
lared him from behind.
quiet Mr. Mahon ; w
heo
' Tear-an-ounds, can t you be
the likes iv ye gets into a carriage with the real sort-4,
ought to learn to behave yerselves, and stay there as 10
as ye can ? le did
The horse dashed on—and every group of peep „0,
',
passed, instead of endeavouring to arrest their pr tea'
added to their speed, by waving their hats and show o,
' Hurrah for Jack I he's the boy can make them go-- ty
rah I' and, hurrah!' shouted Moore and Jack, froreo34
coach-box, in return—while they stamped their feet , anato
every effort to increase the rapidity of the Pace; °Did
seemed now not only to forget their anger, but t 0 4.00,
their perilous position. At length they reached the 'the
where a bridgeless stream flowed across a hollow °later,
road, when the horses plunged their noses into the °rise
and commenced drinking. The occupants of the °art:Rep;
could not get out, for the river was fully three feetiope
and Mrs. O'Mahony, afraid to make any noise, was d ee
tiently expecting relief, while Jack and Moore Ili'
amicable conversation on the box. eye of
Well,' cried the former, looking down, 7iNtvileill: any
paad,':
delight and affection, on the near side horse,
I'm blessed if there's such a bit of flesh in the ocalutY.
how.'
By gorra,' added Wore, he is great entirely' r•ive him
' I'll bet a gallon,' continued Jack, that With
over Bar Creagh, the darkest night that ever 011°7'
out tipping a stone, if they war as big as bee hives'
al ore. •
"Pon my cowl, I don't doubt it,' responded ae° flit
All this time the 'mistress' had her head out °f ;t: oo°B
dow, in the hope of espying assistance; at last, ge
boys at hand, she commenced crying out for their aid ottla
Tear-an-ounds ! ma'am,' said Gach—'
yer tongue, and stey quiet—Dandy's nearly done, "."
ote
any way disturbed, he'll be off agin. or
Fortunately, the horses, being blown, took leng-t tai
they otherwise would have done to slake their thirsl, th
a couple of barelegged gossoons, who paddled throtio
water like wild ducks, waded in to secure the reins
'Easy, Barney,' cried Jack ; ' easy, Ahags to ss
quietly up till ye get hould iv them—Dandy's as Ate-or, h
:
rat-catcher's dog; and if he smells what yer eWa
"Rebus," he'll be offagain ; an' it 'ill be dengerooS bog,
the short turn into the stableyard, for he'll go llg,;) 000_
That's right, Barney, ye were always a handy Pa
(as the bcy handed up the reins)—l'll give Ie A
hap'orth of apples for this the next fair day.' sae& /10
When the carriage was clear of the water, te'''p
Moore, now on terms of perfect amity, alighted to
OS,
good defects—and ' the mistress' and her trio:10;0er
f
The moment she felt herself on terra owl? her
'too
rage broke forth.
Oh, you ungrateful monster,' addressing ,D 0
all I ever did for you, to behave in this sort of sca-Ttog :no
'By gorra,' replied Jack, deliberately klic'tfirolt
broken reins, by gorra, one 'ed think it was thskeoW
W is
the like ever happend to your honour—don't the tlio
enough that from the minite Dandy get cal 4101 '`-n:
Knockrory-hill, the divel out of hell couldn't tbia,da/
until he finds his nose in the water—it's a Pittp-'' res's—
be makin' such a fuss about—l'm ashamed iv
upon my soul, I am, before thes strange
gintlealetioti!
' I'll discharge you the moment I get home' said
—if I never was to enter a carrege again' o
{ter
ltsts
O'Mahony. f the "
Jack paused—he was adjusting the thong °
cried oS
whip, which a ' gaffer' had picked up and °as
be 0
eat 121011
him—then advancing near to where his rnistres
a bank—and touching the handle of his 11 vfhi,,i);orfar,,geett
solemnly,—' By the blessed stick if ye do,
ye, if ye were to cry for a week—so mind what
now—that's all,'
ober° do',
TNolanhe night scene on the Kentish etosr'
and Mr. Bush the asthmatic Euge,%B
Bated
07
are out cooling themselves in the sea br coocei ur
boosing over mulled port ad /ibitton, is f 00°00
in the highest vein of the hunaourcusi 13..obabli'dat
essentially spontaneous, and therefore, P` pjetit'_l4
completely and hilariously entertainingt'on toettVe
however, if, without doing more now stitaie°o3ll
touching thus upon what it is that u°aularlf hoe‘
charm of the ingenious and sing ebrotirofe
constructed plot,—viz., its probability;
0,0
—enough if, in addition to wba,Lloy
already said in regard to the merits cui pfeflotd
nant, we here observe upon it, as RavP right (1004
maiden work, in conclusion, that it is
n'a 00014
freshness, its vivacity, of its fun a tale ate/
thoroughly exhilarating animation, iiiooooo
of inaugurating—as we hope it Will
a new literary reputation:
----- isle 11741?
Meadowleigh : A Tale of En a
By the Author of "The Ladies et cbe rtfr
Two Vols. Bentley.
an o
/100 e,
0
The authoress of " Mary Powell," 13110 ;t
and Violet," end of "The Old Clieisertt raneeo, 110
was a most charming writer. Thievoys 11.01.40
sometimes quaint, her Style was 1, deligb: /ea'
writings were for the most part trullirdi our la
it happens occasionally, hoWever)Vi