The British Press; or, Morning Literary Advertiser.
London, England, 1820-01-27 00:00:00

1'703113-STOYR IVARRROVSE ; or MACAW, DES
I • MODES MONUMENTAL, AT PARIS, 1619.
Main 66 Tbe Logien* Megasion.l7 published by Baldwin
Craduek, sad boy.]

1 lady, well known in the fashionable circles of
Paris, lately lost by death • relative who had been
domiciliated with he► for some years, and who, being
in some measure • depending, took all the drud-
gery of house-keeping off her hands. Though an
Englishman, I happen to stand on the footing of
a particular friend in this family ; and having, for
I years past. been accustomed to wait upon
the lady as her attendant to all parties abroad, her
assistant when she received at home, and her aide-
de-camp when the orders to shopkeepers were of
too delicate • stature to be trusted to a footman—
my services, on this sorrowful occasion, were us-
totally expected, and as naturally offered.
I *hall soy nothing of the order of the funeral ;
every thing was comiucted with decency, and, at
the same time, with a magnificence worthy of the
()potence sod respectability of the family, sod cal-
culated to impress on the minds of the spectators,
the magnitude of the distress which the gloomy
pomp represented by all the external embleme of
woe. This painful ceremony finished, a monument
to Cie deceased b-came the next oisiect of attention,
and I was requested to. take the necessary measures
fur having a switable one erected.
In order thiit I might worthily execute this in-
teresting commission, I consulted my friend the
Marquis of 8., who boil lately lost • consort whom
he highly respected, but never lived with ; and to
whose memory lie had erected a superb marble,
which testified, with all the pathos of poetry, how
much the heart of the ►urvivor was torn by the
violent separation. On inquiry of this gentleman
what tradesman had so well served him in his
affliction, he said lie was unable to inform me,
hot having yet paid the expenses of the funeral
—he referred me, however, to Monsieur G--,
the well-known friend of his lamented wife;
who had taken, es he expressed it, all the burden
of the thing on his own shoulders, and had kindly
relieved his wounded feeling. by ►eeing that Ma-
dame received all those attentions which were due
to her after death, as he hail, still more kindly,
been unrentiningly assiduous aupres &elle, during
the life-time of the ever-to-he-deplored lady.
To Monsieur G-- I itrcordingly went, without
delay, sod found hint dull and disposed to be silent.
He said little of his lost friend, but seemed to think
much ; and, as he appeared disinclined to entertain
company, I quitted him as soon as he had furnish-
ed me with the address of our of the most cele-
brated Parisian dealers in monuments.

i.e Smut- M. N. is the owner of • most magnifi-
cent establishment io this wry ; t•.te, order, and
smiling politeness there reign; and, walking along
the first gallery into which I entered, surrounded
by angels and genii, •nd nymphs shining in the
purest alabaster, conducted by a bowing employe, I
thought to myself—" this is indeed smoothing the
passage to the tomb." The &beery of the ten-
derest nerves would not be startled here by the
mementos of death.

I found it would be necessary to wait is little be.
fore I could explain the purport of my visit, for the
master had customers with him. Ills talents were
well known, and no genteel person ■t Paris likely
to want a monument. would think fur • moment
of being furnished by any other than M. N. His
improvements in his art had twen recorded in the
Magazine of Intentions, and some of his finest if
tides were exhilsied at the felts of French industry.
as • proof of the increased consumption of the
nation. Ax I advanced towards the great man, I
found him ill() much occupied with a couple of
gentlemen, dressed in deep mourning, to observe
my approach ; and I was,
I must confess, struck by
the simple dignity with which hr conducted business.
In the Almanac des Commands, it is said of Beau-
sillier., one of the master spirits of French cookery,
who did things in hi► art which she world will not
rrilliaglq let die—that with one of his sauces, a man,
with a good appetite, might eat his own father! It
would be doing injustice to Le Stew M. N. to
limit his panegyric tarrying of his monuments, that
a man might desire one fur his own father ; this
would he affirming but little ; but, if I may speak
from my own feelings. I would say, that no one
ho enters this warehouse can quit it without I►eing
seduced into dusiiing a monument for himself, nay
stipulating that it should be finished off hand, and
aent home without delay.
When I came Hp to the party, I found the cue.
tomers had but just commenced their bargain:—
" I want a tomb.stane," said the elder of the
two.

" For men or woman, Sir ?" osked the master,
with Lacedemoilian [nevi!), and Perisieu quick-
ness.

1, For a worthy gentleman who was rather ad-
vanced in life before he left it."
" Have the goodness to step this way then ; the
men shove fortv are to time right. Bachelor, or
husband, Sit ?" _

" Our late friend was a married man."

"billy well : Juba, be ready to ,hew the arti•
cles for the married men abort forty; you must
have finished by this time putting the private cost
mark on the young women."
" We wish a stone That shall enure.' the virtues
of the deceased: his children greatly regret his loss."
" A h ! that's quite another thing ; you ought to
have mentioned at first that he was the father of a
family : John, the gentlemen wish to see thefaditers
effonsihes above forty—they're on the other side,
you know, close to thefriends in need."
The mourners proceeded with the attendant to.
wards another wing of the extensive building, when
I took advantage of the opportunity, thus offended
me, by addressing the sassier. Firm I compliment-
ed him on his powers of classification, which I run.
sidered as unsurpassed by those of Linua•us hisnoelf.
•' Sir, 1 find the arrangement convenient," was the
modest reply of the hewer or stone. a' 'Pone and
trouble are saved to all parties. People by this
means are always prepared for death, as one may my,
and I avoid getting into scrapes with the living.__
Formerly. Sir. nothing could be more precarious
or puzzling than the trade of a maker of mono.
silents. It waa as bad a. portrait pointing : no set's.
lying the first demands of grief without exceeding
the decisions of resection. 1 beer seen an epitaph
in gold letters ordered with tears in the eyes ; mud,
when the bill has been resealed, the inheritiog woe.