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If you're female, birth control. Seriously... I went from horrible acne to maybe one zit per month during my period. Also, in my opinion, it does a lot of other nice things besides keeping you from having babies. If you can't/don't want to go on birth control/are male/etc., try an apricot scrub or a non-oily acne wash. Apricot scrubs are grainy enough to take all of the dead skin off and clear the gunk out of your pores, while not leaving oil or other gunk behind to re-clog them. Face washes aren't usually grainy but usually have some sort of cleaner in them (salicylic acid is most common) that at least cleans out your pores. I usually say go for apricot scrub first - a lot of face washes leave your face horribly dry, which can actually make the problem worse by aggravating your skin, and your body may even try to compensate by over-producing oil. In any case, after you wash your face with anything, apply a very light moisturizer to avoid drying out your face too much. Remember - your body produces skin oils for a reason; you want to take off the excess, but don't take it all away. A more home-y approach I've heard of is making your own brown sugar scrubs, you can look up recipes online. I've heard adding a small amount of peppermint oil to them helps. But I would really suggest trying store-bought methods before making anything yourself.

Birth control. If not, apricot scrub or plain acne wash WITH a light face moisturizer afterwards, at least 1-2 times everyday. Last resort, make your own sugar scrub.

I hate that argument because the word usually hasn't actually changed it's meaning, it's just spilt into a secondary meaning. One good example of this is the word "retarded". People like to say "Oh well it's cool to say "that's so retarded" or "you're a retard" because the word now has a vernacular meaning. But I can tell you as a para in a special ed classroom that the word is still used to bully, exclude, and humiliate people with special needs. They hear it used as a slur against them, and then they hear people use it in conversation, and it's hurtful either way you use it because the word holds a sting. It's particularly bad in this instance because when a person with special needs overhears someone say "dude you're so retarded", they will hear it as a slur no matter the meaning you intended. They have more trouble using context, which still wouldn't make it okay but would at least be less hurtful if they understood. But they don't. And it hurts them. Same with "faggot". As long as people out there are using "faggot" to insult or hurt gay people, it will remain a slur and hold that sting every time it's used. Your example is true of the word "dumb", which used to mean "mute". But that's no longer a slur used for mute people and few even know that there's a connection, so calling something "dumb" does not hurt mute people. This is not true of "retarded" or "faggot", because original the meaning of the word still exists and is still used. It's not okay to claim the meaning have changed if they can still be relevantly used with their original meaning (as a slur).

I disagree, because this argument is often applied to words where the hurtful meaning is still used. It hasn't changed , people are just trying to use the slur and get away with it by saying it's something else.

Me and my girlfriend (of 6 months) have a somewhat normal sex life. I have a out raging stupidly high libido that you'd think a 19 year old dude would have, and she has a pretty normal one, I think. I've known that this can be compatible through proper communication. What is weird is I have never initiated sex before. She can't be turned on. She says she's attracted to me, and when we do have sex I think it goes really well. When we first started dating, it used to be once a week on the dot , seriously like the same day each week, same time, same place. Now, sometimes it can be a random 2 week break, nearly even 3 weeks where there is no mention of sex. This is weird right? I've asked her if there's any reason why she's sporadic in these decisions and I get something similar "We would have last night if we were home!", then that usually feels encompassed by guilty sex that night that I am always declining at first because I want her to feel comfortable with it and feel she's just doing it for me. She has never masterbated before, doesn't know how (at least that's what she's told me). She's had plenty of experience with one other long term relationship (almost abusive but she got out before anything bad) and a few shorter ones. She has told me that she doesn't know what turns her on, she doesn't know how to turn herself on, and I've tried every trick in my book over the course of 6 months to help her figure that out but she isn't having any of it. Sometimes I end up a little frustrated with myself because I feel like I can't get her in the mood and when it's been almost 3 weeks. I don't know if that's a sign of me or her. Am I experiencing incompatibility, or is something that can be worked out? How will sex be later in life if I'm never able to initiate it myself with her?

girlfriend doesn't know what turns her on, or how. She's never masterbated nor knows how but has plenty of experience with intercourse. I can't initiate sex. She has weird on/off libido.

I just failed two math classes because of stupid rules that my teacher set in place. No graphing/scientific calculators on exams. We also couldn't use notes or a book for the exams, which is understandable. However, I was taking Business Calculus and Finite Mathematics with the same teacher. He gave us a "study guide" for the exam and I took it to the tutor center at my school and the tutor said oh this stuff is easy, let me get my calculator. I told him we weren't allowed to use graphing/scientific calculators and he then told me he had no idea how to do half of the stuff on the study guide then. Later I took my study guide to an old math teacher that I had in a previous semester and he told me that the stuff we were learning was grad school level stuff, and these classes are part of general requirements for my major.

My calc teacher wouldn't let us use graphing/scientific calculators on exams and expected us to do material that much far beyond what we should be able to know.

I met my girlfriend in a foreign country and we've been seeing each other for 6 months. Things started off rocky as we both weren't looking for something to commit too. Ever since a rocky 1st month or two we have pretty much become inseparable. I really have fallen hard for this girl and I believe she feels the same way. We are both career-oriented persons. She currently has a great job in the foreign country we both live in. We are both scheduled to leave in December, or early February at the latest. I need to go back to Europe for at least a year. I've looked at alternatives but going to study is currently my only option. After a year I will theoretically be free to move anywhere. SHe works in a global organization and could theoretically find herself anywhere in the world. She's ambitious and interested in working in the developing world. I'm wondering what our options are: Long distance - both of us have done long distance in the past and have negative memories of this. Personally, I knew my long distance relationship was destined to fail as neither of us had a long term goal or plan to eventually settle together. Both of us are naturally apprehensive about this as it would mean a commitment for about a year, with minimal prospects of meeting up during this year (perhaps one or two trips). Ask her to postpone her career and follow me to Europe for a year. She should be able to find work in Europe, just work that I believe she considers to be 'boring' and not offer the same career progression that she would find elsewhere. I'm not entirely sure whether this is conceivably an option as it is asking a lot. Similarly I am not sure how/in what context to bring it up. Be a trailing partner - this is basically to sacrifice my career for a year and follow her and her work. Without my year in Europe I stand little hope of finding work in the same location as her (whilst she would still find work in Europe). I am also not sure how to mention it as an option. I would be financially dependent on her which is a further issue. End things - a final option that neither of us are too keen on but that might be the only plausible choice given our scenarios.

Both individuals are leaving our current residence by December. Relationship feels like it has an automatic expiration date and I'm looking to prevent this from happening.

I could postulate all day about all the things I'd do, but my main concern would be my family at that point I think. Anything else would definitely be a "in the moment" decision. Hopefully the people would be able to somehow see my act of defiance/support for them and help me out, but this "betrayal" would likely occur over secure radio channels or behind closed doors somewhere. Regarding my future, I wouldn't even have a chance to toss my uniform if I openly disobeyed an order of this magnitude, especially if it was public. The chain of command would have me secured rather quick I'm sure. Those that have considered these scenarios (and I know MANY that do/have because I've spoken with them) know that making a decision of this gravity would mean ultimately accepting a fate of alienation from their profession at best and death for themselves and their family at worst. Dramatic rescues by "rebels" and redemption once the smoke clears are nice in the movies, but rarely occur in real life. Look at Snowden. His adventure is far from over, but he's not exactly welcome around here for the forseeable future for the same type of "betrayal" we're discussing.

I don't know what I'd do after The Decision. It is my desire to see our issues as a society solved through active cooperation between all levels of government and the people, but acknowledge the possibility of a different future.

Well, it was half-depressing and half-comforting, if you can imagine that. I grew up with this great guy named Josh in my neighborhood. Elementary through high school. He was also in my boy scouting group and we went on countless camps and hikes and activities together. We weren't great friends or anything but we would talk and joke around a lot and we would talk. Later on I ended up getting arrested for stupid stuff during my senior year of high school. I missed Christmas and New Years and was locked up for two months total. Nobody outside of my family wrote me or anything. Except for Josh. He sent me a Christmas card and said he had been having emotional issues and struggling with depression and that he hoped I'd have a good Christmas given my circumstances. I never replied to Josh because I was embarrassed and ashamed that he knew my situation. Later on, I get out and see him at Costco just picking up groceries for his mom or something. We talked for a bit but my girlfriend at the time was in a hurry so I left quickly. My mom starts mentioning that I should hangout with him (I didn't tell her I saw him) and that he could use a friend. I shrugged it off and said he had plenty of friends and I made up some lame excuse. Later on she mentions it again and I shrug it off again. One night I come home from work and my mom is at my place (wasn't living with her) at around midnight. She tells me Josh killed himself. Tears. Like crazy. Just constant tears. This happened spring 2012. A few months ago I had a dream that I was with Josh. Just hanging out and talking. It was one of those dreams where you know it's a dream but you don't really know what to do in the dream. So anyway, I knew that Josh was dead. I knew I was dreaming. So I told him I'm sorry and that I loved him. And he said he knew I loved him. I woke up in tears after I realized what had happened in my dream. I was depressed because of the memories and because of how stupidly selfish I was, but I was also comforted because I felt like my emotions were solved for once.

Friend killed himself and felt partial blame for it. Had a dream that I was with him and he said he knew I loved him. Those feels.

Hey people. I just found out that the guy I was dating and met off Tinder is not a 34 year old single man, but a 42 year old man with two sons. I know, crazy right? I've never had a problem getting dates online, ever. I met my ex boyfriend online, and I've met a lot of guys who were awesome in different ways online as well. Despite meeting awesome guys, nothing has really come out of online dating in the last 7 months. I really like online dating, because provided people are honest you can skip through a lot of the basic compatibilities. I travel about 60% for work and have a home office. I live in the conservative Midwest, I'm a black woman, I date all ethnicities/races, I'm not religious, I have a foul mouth in the right settings, I love dirty jokes and I'm super liberal in a "everyone just mind your own business" sort of way. I'd attach a photo of myself but I believe I read that wasn't allowed? I figure with the amount of bad dates, deceitfulness, and outright lack of connections I've experienced dating guys online... I would probably have the same odds just asking guys out when I'm out and about. Frankly, it sounds refreshing and fun just reverting back to old school methods. I should also mention, I do NOT get approached when I'm out. Never. People assume I get hit on all the time, and I really don't, despite being very approachable and smiley. I'm in sales, so being outgoing and easy to talk to is just second nature for me. Meeting someone out in public really is rolling the dice. So I've decided I'll treat it like a fun numbers game. I'm just going to start hitting on hopefully single men that I find attractive and asking them for coffee. Hypothetically, if I meet a guy out at the pet store, how do I ask him if he's in a relationship (if he's not wearing a ring) and then ask him out for coffee? Then what happens after the coffee? Do I have to keep taking the lead and pursuing him? Will that be his expectation? Men, how would you respond if I approached you, made small talk then asked you for coffee? Be honest, pretend you're not safely sitting behind a computer or cell phone screen.

How do I ask him if he's in a relationship (if he's not wearing a ring) and then ask him out for coffee? Then what happens after the coffee? Do I have to keep taking the lead and pursuing him? Will that be his expectation?

I met my girl friend junior year of high school, and we dated for the last semester of senior year, went to Prom, and really just discovered ourselves, discovered a lot about life and discovered the loves of our lives. I would classify ourselves as "old souls" and have neither really been inclined or appreciative of dramatics or any other nonsense when it comes to our relationship. We pride ourselves on being rational, planning for the future, and generally taking common sense approaches to issues in our relationship. This led us to deciding we wouldn't be together for college (as we were in two different states, Colorado and California) and wanted each other to not be held down or pressured to do anything but make the most of the undergraduate college experience. Well sure enough, we kept in contact all through college, spent the summers with each other, and pretty much decided we were back together as soon as she moved back to our home state after college. We both felt as though we had a great college experience, tested the water with new people, but ultimately knew that there was only one that made us feel truly complete. Needless to say, I love my girlfriend on a thousand different levels, and she it truly my friend and the person I hope to spend the rest of my life with. However, despite being athletic, and big fan of the outdoors (like me : ) ), and having a pretty active lifestyle, I can count on one hand the number of times I have seen her eat fruits and vegetables . I'm talking doesn't like cesear salad, no apples, oranges, asparagus, grapes, broccoli, (occasionally eats brussel sprouts oddly enough), no milk, no juices. Pretty much, if it is classically categorized as healthy, she doesn't eat it. Couple this with a taste for Coke, hot wings (I love this), processed meats and cheeses, and pretty much anything mass produced with high levels of sugar, artificial flavoring, and/ saturated fat. Despite this, she is very fit, and in great shape (scientific anomaly?). All told (I am not a nutritionist), I am afraid that if we have children (mostly likely will), that the kids could be at a severe disadvantage due to health or lack of nutrients in the womb . My mom always talks about how she was so careful with my siblings and I when she was pregnant, and that she ate nothing but healthy food, never sat next to any type of radiation, microwave or otherwise, and ultimately had children who were very healthy physically and intelligently who went on to do pretty darn well in sports, school, standardized tests, bla, bla, bla. Is this just an irrational fear of mine, or do I have something to actually worry about?

Love my long time girlfriend, 99% sure we will get married and have kids, but am worried that SO's nutritional habits could be bad for pregnancy and children's health.

I work at a local community college, doing a lot of different jobs for my office. Dispatch, reception, admin assist, records, about a dozen separate jobs. I'm an employee of the college, but temping in the current position, filling in for the previous employee while they hire a new employee to fill the spot after she left. I was one of the candidates for the position, and this was a well known thing that I had, and have, been doing the job for a couple of months now, having been trained by the previous employee. Went through the whole process, multiple interviews, wearing a full suit, but the committee picked somebody else. Now I'm filling it while that candidate is vetted, and I'll be training her. One of the major bigwigs on our campus just came into the office to drop off some paperwork, and congratulated me on getting the job. I told him I hadn't actually gotten the job. He was floored. I had to explain the situation. Moment of triumph, people with fancy titles, lots of letters after their names and offices the size of my apartment know who I am, my boss is making stuff up to keep me here as long as possible, and I just had to look one of the brass in the eye and say "No, I didn't get the job." Moment over. What great moments of supreme satisfaction and joy have been ruined by an ugly truth?

Trained for a job, temping the job, applied for the job, didn't get the job, training the replacement. Big Wig congratulates me on getting the job. Truth sours the moment.

so I just recently started dating this girl who, for the past two years, I've had a huge crush on. We'd been friends that whole time but I never thought she was interested. Long story short, I asked her out and she said yes. After about a week of us dating we started having sex. She is the first, and only, person I've ever had sex with. She on the other hand, has had sex with quite a few people. She isn't a slut or anything, but I guess she's a little promiscuous. We have sex around 5 times or more a week. Lately I've been literally feeling sick about having sex with her. We have lots in common and the rest of our relationship is very healthy and we are very comfortable with each other. But I feel like us having sex was very cheap. Now, she claims that she too has had a crush on me longer than I on her. But I've started to feel lately that it wouldn't have mattered if it were me after that first week or not. Could it have been any other guy? I've dated about three other girls in the two years that I had a crush on my current gf. Two of those three girls wanted to have sex with me, but I decided not to because it didn't feel right. But with her, she was all I wanted for so long, that we had sex so quickly. My problem is that, even though she said she had the same feelings for me as I had for her, she had sex with those guys after not dating them for very long. So I feel almost worthless. I'm really not sure what to do because I have never had such strong feelings for any girl (I'm usually pretty passé about most things, but I always feel so energetic with her). So, for those who read this all, firstly, thanks for your time, secondly, what do you feel my course of action should be? And yeah, I know we're young. Please don't chastise me for it.

really into new gf. Feeling like sex is cheap because she's been with a handful of fellas, I sort of saved myself for her. I feel like it wouldn't have mattered if it were me or not. Advice?

When I was a kid me and my sister were playing baseball at a nearby park. We had lost a signed ball because we were stupid enough to play with it. Anyways, after searching for several minutes all hope was lost and I had an idea. I grabbed a rock and held it to the sky saying, "please god, let the rock show me where the ball is." I then turned in circles with my eyes closed and threw the rock. Upon walking towards the rock, I found the ball lying directly next to the rock. Me and my sister were in such shock at what had just happen and with smiles on our faces went to get slurpies from 7-eleven. After making our purchase just minutes after this crazy event, our change came out to $6.66....

Me and my sister lost a signed baseball, asked god to help us find it. Minutes after finding in a crazy way, we made a purchase and the change was $6.66..

I met this girl on Hot or Not back in February and we hit it off great, quickly becoming attached to one another. After a couple of months, she became very busy so our conversations hit a lull for a month in which I thought she grew uninterested in me. This week we reconnected and she was hurt that I was "ignoring" her--which I didn't intend to do as I thought she was ignoring me. After solving that misunderstanding and making her feel better about us, I brought up the discussion about an end game or plan to be together. This is where things went sour. Quick backstory: We both planned to move to San Diego for school within the next couple of years. Unfortunately, I was denied admission so I recalculated and will be going to another university far away for at least two years. She's still going to San Diego because of family. Basically, there's no end game. As a substitute for this, she immediately offered to visit me because she has some free time this summer. She lives in Texas and I live in northern California, so it's an expensive trip. I declined the offer because I can't ever afford to visit her, so it felt unfair. After pressing her more about how we could be with each other, we didn't reach any conclusions until after we were done with school in 2-4 years. This is too long for both of us to wait, in my opinion. I really, really like her though and I want to help her and be with her. I told her that we should go our separate ways, but I'm having second thoughts because I do like her still. Should I cut my losses and leave her for good, or should I try to engage in a long-distance relationship that may end in more suffering months down the road? Have any of you been in a long-distance, long-term relationship? Was it worth it, or is unbearable to love someone who you can't be with? Is there any advice you can offer me in this situation?

I met a girl online, our plans to meet up and be together fell through, I like her but I'm hesitant to wait 2-4 years to finish school and start our lives together. Advice on whether or not it's worth it?

one of the Science teachers in my high school disappeared one day. He never called in sick, so his students turned up for I think three periods before the principal realized he wasn't in his classroom. Nobody ever saw him again, so of course the rumors flew that he'd had an affair with a student and her parents found out and he was run out of town. A girl I knew was friends with his family and said that it wasn't true, but she wouldn't say what happened to him or where he went. Fast forward 20 years, I'm at my reunion and we get to talking about him, and it turns out he didn't "have an affair" with a student -- he assaulted her in the classroom after school while he was supervising some extra-credit/university-level project she was working on, apparently literally chasing her around the room until she got out. She told her parents, and subsequently was never seen again. He was replaced by a nerd-handsome young guy who we were pretty sure started having an affair with my young beautiful French teacher that all the boys were in love with (they were both single, so not a big deal other than when you're 15 the idea of two of your teachers having a shag is pretty scandalaous on its own.) another science teacher was (finally) arrested for having about 30 years' worth of child pornography in his house. This was after a couple of decades of not-very-subtle frottage in the classroom, rubbing his groin against the edge of the lab table and apparently along girls' arms as he would walk down the aisles checking work (I never had a class with him, so was blissfully free of creepy-teacher activity). He did the crotch-table thing so often that at least once in every class year someone would rub chalk all over the edge of the table to watch him wind up with a crotch covered in chalk. The entire town was in a tizzy when he finally got popped as part of a larger sting, and there was all this handwringing in the local newspaper about how nobody suspected a thing, how could anyone have known, bla bla until finally a former student wrote in and said basically "Hey idiot parents, every single student in that school knew, and would have told you if we thought you'd have believed us or done something to stop him, which you wouldn't because you would never believe that nice eccentric Mr. Garney was a kiddie-diddler." That pretty much shut everyone up.

One Science teacher run out of town for attacking a student in an attempted sexual assault, another Science teacher busted for kiddie porn after decades of in-classroom sexual activity.

We're not downvoting the math. Your math is incorrect. The important thing is that you are opening the cases at random. There's a 98.9% chance that you'll have opened the winning case by the time there are two left. If you wind up having a choice at the end between the winning case and a non winner, you just got lucky. There is nothing special about the case you didn't pick because it had an equal chance at being eliminated as the others. With everything being random chance, the end choice is 50/50. This is the same thing if Monty Hall didn't know where the car was, and opened the doors at random. If you ended up with a goat and car being left in the final two cases there is a 50/50 chance of the car being behind your door. You gain no new information because you aren't following the rules of the Monty Hall problem.

It's 50/50 because there are no guarantees that you wouldn't eliminate the winning case as you eliminate the other 98, unlike Monty Hall, who is forced to only eliminate doors with goats.

F26 (European), M24 (American) Dating almost 2 years, long-distance for most of that time. We met while I (F26) was visiting a friend on the west coast. Hit it off instantly and kept in touch via fb/skype when I got home. It only took about a week to decide that it was worth a shot and since then we've been happily dating, traveling back and forth between continents. Even though we're long-distance, we've managed to spend almost 7 months living together, so we do know that we get along well and can live together without any major issues. However. We do have one huge problem and we don't really know what to do about it, so we're turning to you for help. He wants kids, I kinda don't. I'm fairly set in my ways. We want to end the long-distance part, but moving in together permanently would getting married so I can get a visa. Him moving here, which wouldn't require a visa, is impossible for various reasons. I wouldn't mind getting married or even moving there to a degree (I've lived in the States before, for college, and I get along really well with his family and friends), and he has no issues with that part either...but...the kid issue is something we can't ignore. We both love each other very much and it'd hurt like hell to have to break up over this, when everything else is working so well. This is my first serious relationship, his second/third depending on how you define "serious". What do you suggest we do? I have issues of my own - not being happy with my job and where I am in life - but I'm not sure going all Suzy Homemaker would make me happier. It's not something I've even considered an option before, coming from divorced parents and being a complete forever aloner (relationship-wise) before I met M24.

f26, m24, we love each other very much and want to get engaged/married but can't decide on the kid issue. At this point, it's kind of break up or get engaged, since we don't want to waste each other's time.

After my last mess of a relationship, which I ended, I am now ready to get back in the game of not just having one nighters/week long dating sessions any longer. There is a girl (call her Anna) who is 3 years younger than I, I'm graduated from University, and she is about a 4 hour drive north currently attending her University. We were a part of the same club all throughout middle/high school, and I actually went on a date with her older sister, who is now happily married with a kid. Anna has matured a lot and we have talked on facebook a few times, like quick comments on statuses and what not, nothing serious, but it prompted me to look at her photos and interests and such. Probably not a good idea b/c I'm in love. It's summer and I have no obligations where where I live, she comes to our 'hometown' often which is about a 45 minute drive (also where my parents live) away from my current locale. Is FB/Twitter appropriate to message and see if she wants to hang out? I have always strayed away from this type of dating b/c I'm usually at a bar or something when I meet women.

want to know if it's okay to ask a girl I havn't really talked to much in the past few years, but knew well in high school, to hang out via facebook or twitter

Alright, so.. My boyfriend of 5 months left for Mexico two days ago. I stayed the night with him before he left, so we could spend some quality time together. When his alarm went off in the morning, I unlocked his phone to turn it off, and a google browser window automatically popped up (he must not have exited it), with a very alarming sentence entered into the search bar: "Best places to pick up in Playa Del Carmen", with a few links shown that they had been visited (indicated by purple text, as opposed to blue for unvisited links). This is more concerning to me because in November, he went to Colombia (with the same [male] friend he's in Mexico with) and he told me they "ended up in a Brothel". Apparently friend stayed, and my boyfriend left. So that left me weirded out as well. I'm obviously sick over this. I confronted him about it immediately. He was wavering back and forth between "it just popped up next" and "I must have searched 'best places to..' for fifty things". I left very angry, and hardly talked to him at all the day he left. He's been messaging me when he's connected to wifi, assuring me that he loves me and would never do anything to hurt me. I've been vocal about my lack of trust. I thought we would be okay to talk, but the inconsistent messaging and moods just make me more skeptical, given the situation. I think he thinks we're okay.. but I'm still very much not okay. I mostly just want to not talk to him at all until he's back home. I'm pretty angry, and very hurt. I just don't understand why anyone would look that up and then claim they don't mean anything by it? Help me, Reddit. What do I do? [Edited to provide more information]

Hours before my boyfriend left for Mexico, I found a Google search he made for "best places to pick up in Playa Del Carmen". He's been gone for two days and I'm still sick over it. Not sure what to do.

I [20M] have been in a relationship for 8 months now, with [25F] who sought me out, and asked me out. She had been cheated on 6 months before she met me by her fiance of 7 years, and was still devastated, so she made it clear while we were exclusive, we were not boyfriend/girlfriend, she wasn't ready yet. Since this is my first relationship, I'm not sure about the boundaries I'm comfortable with. So I said no flirting, or extensively talking to people you have a crush on, and tell me if you ever have a crush. She agreed and was very adamant on strict monogamy. A month or so ago she watched the Ted talk on monogamish, basically flirting is OK, but nothing physical. We never agreed on it, nor did she ask if I wanted it, but I could tell it really spoke to her. For the past 3 weeks, she has been extensively talking to some guy she has a crush on in her class. It culminated with them exchanging numbers, and setting up a coffee date (she said no to an actual date) she went on the date talked for 3 hours, but says they never kissed or anything physical. She immediately felt really bad, and told me on her own the next day she saw me. Here's what I still have questions about, in her messages to him, she said she really enjoyed the date and looked forward to doing it again. Ofcourse she messaged her per my request the next day saying she's taken and there will be no more dates, and ofcourse promptly deleted the messages. She told me her type is big African American guys, (idk why the fuck she would say that to me) and I think he is her type and I am very much not though she says she finds me very attractive, should it matter if she finds him more physically attractive than me? I honestly don't think anyone is more attractive to me than her (before this incident). As she was breaking the news to me she said we just don't make sense together, she mentioned the age difference, our different upbringings and religious beliefs. But he made perfect sense, he was older, more situated, has a house, but wants to get married right now, which she doesn't. Lastly I have a pretty serious illness, and for whole duration of the affair I've been pretty I'll, I needed her now more than ever, so the betrayal feels even worse. So considering she knows what it feels like to be cheated on, is literally pursuing a psychology masters to research infidelity, we are about 8 months in to what she would never let me call a relationship, is there even anything to salvage? I love her, and she makes me happy, she says she loves me.

cheated on 8 months into what I was never allowed to call a relationship, is there anything to salvage? I am on mobile so sorry if the formatting is crap, I tried.

I've been together with my boyfriend for over a year and I love him with all my heart. Sex was never amazing for me. They were enjoyable, but I could never come (he doesn't know this), which I didn't mind because I liked to know that he was pleased and I could just masturbate when I would feel more horny. We used to have sex around 6 times a week, sometimes twice a day for the first 6 months of our relationship. The frequency started to decrease recently and now we only have sex once every week or so, and it is always quite routine-like, always the same. I have been on the pill for about 2 years now and recently I've been diagnosed with severe anxiety and sometimes I think I may have depression. Could these things be affecting my sex drive? I don't even masturbate often anymore and I used to do it a lot. Second question is, what can I do to want more sex? I am willing to try new things and work on the relationship because I am very happy with him. I feel guilty that we don't have sex as often anymore. I have told him about my lack of sex drive and also that I wanted to try new things. (Anything but threesomes, I'd get too jealous!)

I've been with my boyfriend whom I love deeply for over a year, my sex drive is fading and we don't have sex often anymore. What can I do to make our otherwise happy relationship better?

So we've been friends since our freshman year of highschool and now I am a college graduate he is in his last year of undergrad. He has dated many girls in both high school and college which has always been fine with me. Since about junior year of high school he has had feelings for me which I learned both from him and our other friends. After I told him I didn't like him we stopped talking as much and hanging out. About four years ago he dated a girl for a year and we got close again. After they broke up he got super clingy to me. We went to school in different states and he spent a year over seas so it wasn't to bad. A year ago March he asked me out again and I said no straight out no open door, no. He seemed okay at first with it but now his clinginess has been increased about ten fold. I'm currently only employed as a babysitter/nanny and most of my time is spent being a caregiver to my 94 yo grandmother. Whenever he is home he expects me to drop everything to hang out with him he also keeps trying to get him to go visit him in Boston, our hometown is in PA. I can't afford to go visit him but it doesn't stop him from asking me constantly. Currently he is trying to get me to go to Florida with him. Even though I can't afford it he keeps insisting "you can figure it out." He gets angry when I am busy or working or have family visiting. He also texts me multiple times a day. I just ignore it because I have also told him multiple times that I don't like texting all the time. Currently have sixteen text messages from him that I have not responded to. Three from today. I know ignoring solves nothing but I feel like that's better then one word non answers I would give. I don't want to cut all ties because when he has a girl friend he is a very good friend again but when he is single he is so over the top clingy.

friend of nine years wantz to date, I say no but he still wants to hang out all the time. I find him very annoying and at this point ignore his texts which doesn't stop him from trying to talk to me.

Hey Reddit. I feel shattered right now. Pretty beat up. I guess I just need someone to talk to. about a month ago, I (19 M) broke up with my then GF (19 F) of 1.5 years. She was an amazing person, but the relationship itself had just went sour. We both had become very sour and bitter towards each other. It was a nice breakup. One we'd both seen coming. We agreed to stay friends afterwords. But we ended up becoming closer than friends. She started acting like the girl that I fell in love with when we first started dating. She started telling me she loved me. Hinting we should get back together. I consistently kept telling her 'no' -- Weakly, I confess, but I told her no. We were both still officially broken up. But at the same time we were still 'more than friends'. We are both very overprotective people. While we were dating we both had a rule "no unnecessary contact with the opposite sex" -- And we liked it pretty well. I was considering getting back together with her, until today. After we broke up, I started 'talking' with other girls. Lowkey flirty but not overtly sexual relationships with other girls. I hung out with them a couple times and talked with them every couple days on facebook, but that was it. The kind of stuff that would be ok-to-mildly inappropriate in other relationships, but TOTALLY a red line when it came to us. I started to realize I didn't like any of those other girls and none of them were good for me like my ex. Today she was using my phone and saw a text from one of the girls. I told her she was free to read any of the conversations I had (BIG MISTAKE) because I didn't have anything to hide. As she read more and more, she became more and more upset. She wanted to read every conversation I had in the last month. She started crying. I tried to stop her. In the end, she ran away bawling her eyes out. I couldn't stop her. I'm feeling so low and terrible right now. I don't now what to do. She is the girl I've always wanted and now I lost it all. Did I lose this girl forever? I'm such an idiot. I loved her NOTE: We were BOTH VERY over protective of eachother. Total free snoop access to eachothers stuff while dating. And we built a trust and understanding together with that. I am JUST as overprotective person as she is. This was a plus for me!

We broke up but were close to getting back together. I'd been talking with other girls post breakup and she found out. I ruined everything :(

It would probably help if smear campaigns weren't a thing. Or yellow journalism. Or extremism. The problem with voting these days is you're talking about devoting serious time and energy to learning things about politicians whose careers may span decades in order for you to determine how you'll vote. It sounds trivial, but if they were a district superintendent for 9 years, a governor for 10 years, in the house of reps for 5 years, and a senator for 4 years, you have to comb hundreds if not thousands of motions, bills, and other related policies to see if this guy is the guy you want to vote for. You have to have a pretty solid understanding of things like riders and economic climate to know why they made certain decisions. It's too much for the average person to do once every 4 years for 2-3 possible candidates. Forget about doing it for every elected official out there. That's why so many people skim their current policies and follow what the media says.

You're right, we shouldn't vote for who our parents vote for, but there's no way we can get all the information required to make a truly informed decision for every election. In my opinion, the system is broken.

Novelty account just for this. Ok, so I had gone out with this guy a couple of times - met him online and was pretty excited about him. Has his own business but still takes off on crazy motorcycle trips; in other words, that rare nice, together guy/fun adventurous "bad boy" balance that most women seek. We had a couple of epic dates that left me spinning - no hooking up cuz I was taking it slow. Date 2 I teased him about not giving me his last name - he laughed it off and I let it go. Date 3 I became more insistent: "C'mon, it'll be fun, I will Facebook stalk you and you can pretend I'm that crazy hot chick you met on the internet that your friends warned you about!" (I'm joking, right - I thought it was cute.) He gives me a serious look and said, "We need to have a talk." I was like, "Haha, that sounds like True Confessions or something lol" and he just looks at me. Him: "You ever heard of that show Dateline?" Me: "Uh, yeah, I guess so." Him: "So, yeah - I was kinda on that show." Me:"......" Turns out he had been online chatting with this girl a few years back. Said she was 13 and a virgin. She invites him to her house (30 minutes away) for some kinda sexytime adventures. He goes. And promptly meets Chris Hanson and discovers that he has been taped in an episode of "To Catch a Predator," a sting operation to arrest attempted pedophiles. Do I leave right away? No. I honestly did not know how to react. The thing is, he is such an awesome guy. /sigh. I know how to pick 'em :)

I had 2 dream dates with an awesome guy and it turned out that he's a pedophile on Megan's List who got caught by Dateline NBC.

I am sorry that this is such a petty problem, but I need advice, and I am sick and tired of being a doormat. I am friends with a group of girls, many of whom I grew up with. One, codename Jenny, has known me since we were 11. None of them want anything to do with me outside of school. This Halloween, for example, I was waiting to hear where we would all go, after being promised I'd be brought along. A couple hours later, and it turns out that Jenny forgot to text me (I texted her first), is terribly sorry, and thinks we can hang out some other time, just not right now. She didn't even tell me where she was- I only learned the following day. I haven't done anything with my friends outside of school all year. They didn't talk to me over the summer. I dislocated my knee on Sunday, was out for a week, and got a text from Jenny on Thursday. This sounds vapid, but it hurts so much to sit at home knowing that people don't want you. They always talk about all the fun they have, and it kills me. I've never been to a party, and they obviously don't want me there. School has been a stressful academic hell, and I'm not a friend to them unless I'm giving them notes. I decided to call it quits. It's a waste of my time, we're all going to college soon, and I don't think I can get them to like me without becoming the sort of people they are. But I don't know how to end it. I am pretty pissed off, especially about Halloween, but I don't want a big, ugly public display. The gameplan right now is to pull Jenny off to the side, tell her that I waited at home in my costume on Halloween night, and that this is the last incident I am going to put up with. So do I go out with a bang and let her know that what she does is hurtful? It's not like I'll see these people again, and they've made me miserable. I don't want to make her miserable in turn, but I think telling her these things might be cathartic.

a group of friends (spearheaded by Jenny) has left me out for years. Do I talk to Jenny privately and tell her that exclusion is a horrible feeling and I'm pretty disappointed, or do I take the 0-drama high road and just ignore them/distance myself?

I don't usually post this kind of stuff anywhere but I don't have anybody I can talk to about this. I'll try to be about as vague as possible since I'm honoring her request not to let anybody know that the real reason she left me was because she is a lesbian.   I loved my girlfriend and still do very much; and this is a problem. The relationship was perfect, we never fought about anything and laughed with each other all the time, amazing bedroom life, just about anything I could have ever wanted. I'm getting ready to propose to her this year and start a family 3-4 years later with her, until I'm picking her up one day and she flat out tells me she's a lesbian. Fast forward 4 months later and I've failed out of all my classes for the semester and still very upset and depressed. I sleep until 2-4 PM almost every day and look at my ceiling in my bed from 2-6 am when I try to sleep. I try not to contact her at all anymore but I can't help myself and when I message her I just get hateful and resentful when she replies back with her 2 word uninterested responses. I don't know what to do. I'm not going to kill myself but this has completely broken me and I still haven't recovered yet. How do I move on with my life and find someone else? I'm in college now and I don't do anything social or get out basically at all; I debated using Tindr or something to meet someone else, but that feels kind of shallow to me and I think you have to log into it with Facebook and I really don't want my friends seeing me on there either. I feel like so much time was taken from me and I'd really like to be back into a relationship because I would like to have a family some day. Can anyone help me?

Girlfriend of 5 years is a lesbian and isn't interested in me anymore in the slightest. How do I finally move on and meet someone else?

This douchebag has been bullying me nonstop for 10 years (k-9) and in 8th grade, he started getting his gang of butt-buddies after me. I will call the douche George, and the main butt-buddy Jim. Our bus is full to capacity, to note. At the beginning of the school year, George and Jim fucked up the two back seats of the bus. This causes them to be removed, and, naturally, the two kids go to steal the seat of the least popular kid in the grade, me. Myself, a defensive motherfucker, kept ensuring my seat didn't get taken. They started calling me names, mainly calling me gay (straight with a girlfriend) which pissed me off. George started making fun of me for this and that, being a little hypocrite. I called him off, and HE went to the principal. Last straw was when he took my seat, and I sat on his legs. He left almost in tears. We both got sent to the principal. The best part, he got in a buttload of trouble, and I walked away with nothing. We go to different high schools now, so, win win.

Made bully cry, got him in trouble, and left at the end of the year left knowing I would never see him again. Sorry for wall, on a tab

Hey reddit, I am having this problem for some time now. There is this one girl I met in another city a few years ago, we had a good time and ended up in her bed.. while I had a girlfriend that I am married to now. Never told my girlfriend about it, but the girl knew that I had a gf. I never thought about it very much again, because we were living so far away from each other, it didn't make any sense. I always liked to think about her, but that was it. A few months ago, I got word from someone, that she moved to my city. Now I am completely lost and freaked out by the thought that I could meet her again by chance one day. I could even call or text her to see if she wants to meet, but I just don't dare, because I fear what could happen to my life. I have never had such a strong literally chemical feeling of connection to someone, there was just this really big energy and spark between us from the first moment we met. Even everybody else noticed. Now I have two options: call/text her and meet or just let it be. Maybe we won't have that connection anymore since it's like 3 or 4 years gone.. but still I am freaked out by the thought of meeting her. A few times, I almost texted her but then.. my wife.. I love her too. I love her very much.. but maybe I am in love with two women... Oh god please reddit, help me!!!!

met a girl a few year ago lightyears from my home that I liked very much, got married meanwhile, now she's moved to my city. What now?

My great-grandpa got remarried when he was in his 80's. The ceremony took place in Frankenmuth, which is a town in Michigan famous for it's Bavarian buildings and the largest Christmas store in the world. I sat towards the back with my parents, and shortly after they started the wedding polka music started playing. It was loud but only the back few tables could hear it. It played throughout the entire thing so about 6 people were awkwardly laughing while they were saying "I do." Another time was in high school when my best friend and I each got a MIP. We were sitting in the courtroom waiting to go in front of the judge when I looked over and saw a framed picture of Mr. T. Just a big wall with nothing on it but Mr. T. I point this out to her and we couldn't help ourselves. Man, were our parents pissed. I feel I should add I was in a small town called Davison and there was no reason it should been there. It's not like he just stopped by at the courthouse or anything. Unless he was going to see where Michael Moore grew up.

at my great-grandpa's wedding and polka music played during the whole thing. In court waiting to go in front of the judge and saw a framed picture of Mr. T by itself on the wall.

Kiwi here. NZ is a small country (around 4.5 million people) with beautiful land and seascapes. Demographic: The biggest city is Auckland, with over a million people (big for us) and is the most diverse city in the country, home to hundreds of different nationalities. It has a ton of Chinese, Indian, Maori and Islanders amongst white people. What's surprising about Auckland is that most people get along well, regardless of race, religion or sexual orientation despite it being a diverse city. We don't care if you're chinese, australian, sheep, gay etc. The rest of NZ is the same too. View: Auckland has a big city ( with a lot of buildings surrounded by the beautiful ocean, forests and ranges. Away from the city, Auckland consists of houses ( and some parts have more greenery (hills and farms) than houses. The South island has a lot more greenery than city (farms etc) and the majority of people there are white. Check out /r/EarthPorn for incredible pics of New Zealand! There's a couple everyday ;) Food: Being a diverse country, there's tons of different foods here: Chinese, Indian, Mexican, Italian, Greek, Portuguese, Japanese, German and American just to name a few. The minimum wage here is $14.75 per hour but food is expensive. Electronics and clothes bought from stores are also expensive compared to America and to a lesser extent, Australia. This is why a lot of us buy stuff online.

Beautiful city, greenery and ocean; we're accepting of everyone regardless of race, religion or sexual orientation; the minimum wage is $14.75 and food, clothes and electronics are expensive and we have lots of different types of food.

I was in a 4 year relationship and now I'm single. A different girl I have crush on (and I also get the feeling she might be interested in me) still knows that I'm in that relationship. We work sort of in the same place so we do see each other regularly. I'm planning to flirt with her to see if she respondes positively and then ask her out. But if she thinks I'm still in a relationship she will probably think I'm a douche cheating on my gf (which I'm not). How do I let her know that I'm single? Should I tell her directly? I think that would be seen as weird and will also compromise me. I thought about the FB "I'm single" thing but I think it's cheesy. Has anybody been in the same position? P.S. I pondered the "The don't crap where you eat" saying, but this girl is too amazing to go by this rule.

Mandatory summary/question! Girl I'm interested in still thinks I'm in a committed relationship. How do I make her aware that now I'm single without compromising my interest?

Well, I've had a go at this business, mostly at party's of people I'm not big fans of. So based from last time, I would take all the cutlery from the kitchen (except for spoons) and shove them handle first into the garden, in out of the way places, but places where they could be found. Then I empty all the pets form the washing line out onto the lawn, then I take snack food items (jellies, corn chips, marshmallow, put it in the half full kettle and turn it on. Following that, I spray whiskey on to various sheets and pillowcases in the airing cupboard, and cover some pillows with hairspray. Suffice to say they weren't too pleased but it was fun and most definitely worth it. Me and a friend had an additional plan that involved releasing crickets into their bedrooms and aircon vents, not enough for an exterminator but enough to deny them a good nights sleep, alas the pet store had closed so we had to scrap that plan.

I messed up all the cutlery, an appliance, bedding and upholstery for the fun of it. And I would do the same in the OP's provided circumstances.

This is kind of a doozy but here's the jist of it: I'm 19 and Tanya is 17. Yesterday she told me that two years ago, she was drugged and raped by the guy she was dating. She had to get an abortion soon after and her parents don't even know. In fact, I am one of 4 people she has ever told this to. Since then, she's had a very hard time trusting people and an even harder time with affection. She communicated all of this to me and I did my best to not break down in front of her. It was truly devastating to hear, the best I could manage was to hold her tight and give her, and myself, time to collect ourselves. She herself was on the verge of tears telling me this. She still holds herself responsible for what happened despite my best efforts to convince her she did nothing to deserve this. She told me she was terrified of how I would react and what I would think of her. To me, she is still the same beautiful individual I'm falling for. I really care about her. I want to make it work. I've told her I accept her no matter the baggage and that my opinion of her has not changed at all. The problem is: I'm a very affectionate person. In a relationship, I need hugs, strokes and kisses like I need air. So far she also likes me holding her often but, she has only been able to (relunctantly) kiss me once, and it breaks my heart. I fully understand where she is coming from and I wan't to make it clear that I'm there for her, but at the same time, I need to feel cared for. I need that feminine touch, I need to feel attraction. I want to communicate this all to her, but I'm afraid she'll feel pressured to give in to my ways. The last thing I want to do is hurt her or make her feel like she isn't putting out. I don't even care about sex right now, I just want a passionate kiss goddamnit. I want to feel that spark. As I stayed in the title, I arranged for us to meet telling her, and I quote, that: "I really want us to last, and I believe the key is communication, things between us have been very nebulous so far and I think we should talk about our expectations, hopes, and fears. Like an honest heart to heart" She said she was happy to to do so, and the date is set for tomorow. So how can I effectively communicate my thoughts and concerns to her in this situation? I will be x-posting to /r/relationships for added input.

Girl I'm seeing was raped and nkw has issues with trust and affection, whilst I need affection in a relationship. How do I communicate this eitjout being pushy?

I'm in a situation where we've had a great marriage, get along, have the same goals and she especially wants kids soon. I found out recently hearing through the grapevine (a husband of one of her good friends) that she loves me but is not especially attracted. It's apparently not a physical thing but my interests (more intellectual) and how passive I am. She is attracted to blue collar types and more physical type men as well. One problem further is that in years past she has flirted with such men so I have reason to think it's true though no reason to think she has done anything wrong. It just verifies what I'm hearing. I read, cook, I am very helpful and supportive, and am generally serious. I hate that she gets the benefit of that but only is attracted to men who are not very serious, she praised men who hang out at the bar late when she's on her way home. That kind of thing. I feel like for years (we met at 19) she has gotten the benefit of boring me though it's been hard for me to take her interests to heart at such a young age, but her attraction is to those men who never did or would do a thing. I feel stupid for having tried to be a good guy and husband material when my friends had a decade of fun and now have wives who respect them. I hate that she never told me but told her friends and now it's apparently some running joke among her friends, our friends, her workmates. I want to just do what I want now but it's like I feel l have to hold back from her now. I don't fully trust and I can't look out for her without feeling it's a double edged sword of making me less attractive. We have a good sex life for what it's worth. I still love her and am not looking to leave. Any ideas?

My wife has told her friends that I am not really that attractive to her, I'm too nice. She loves me but is not into me that way. Advice?

When I was a little kid, I went to a museum (museum of civilization by Ottawa) with my grandfather. It was a big place with a whole section for kids to explore, dress up and just gave fun in general. Anyway, he was having a hard time keeping up with me and I was really excited so I wasn't keeping an eye to see how close he was to where I was playing. Eventually he lost sight of me. He put a message out at the front desk and they called my whole name over the intercom to go to the front desk. I figure they used the full name because I have a fairy common name so it wouldn't be surprising if there was another person with my first and last name. Anyway, I heard the intercom message and kept playing. Why? Because I figured that there was another kid in the museum with my whole name who was lost. At this point, I figured grandpa was around...somewhere. When I realized I couldn't see him, I sat down at a bench and waited for him to catch up. An employee noticed and brought me to the front desk.

I was called to the front desk because my grandfather lost sight of me. Figured another kid had my full name and didn't respond to the lost kid message.

She and I I have a freelance job that pays fairly well, I have investments/savings and sometimes I'm hired to work overseas for a while. She goes to college, she's about to graduate and she's mostly broke. She and I have been going out for a year, but we've known for years before that, even our parents knew each other long before we started this relationship. Past Last summer I stayed 3 months overseas to work on a large project. I brought my girlfriend with me, although she could only stay for 3 weeks because of work and then school.It was no problem for me to pay for her flightand most of the expenses while she was here, it costed maybe 4% of what I earned and I was extremely happy to have her with me — and so was she, she'd never traveled that far. Future After this summer we'll be moving in together, she'll graduate and go to graduate school in a different city and I'm happy to follow her—I normally work from home, so location is irrelevant. Before that, though, I was hoping to go overseas again, maybe for just a month or so, and planning on taking her with me for the whole time I’m there. Problem She wants to work this summer or she doesn’t have enough money to pay her expenses next winter. I really want to be abroad and I really want her to come with me, so I wish money wasn’t an issue. But… money isn’t an issue for me. Giving her the 1000€ that she would earn this summer would be no issue at all to me, but she doesn’t feel right accepting my money, she'd feel a kept woman. I told her that really she wouldn’t even have to accept it, I could just pay the full rent for the first three months of winter and we’d be fine . I mean, it works either way for me. That money is not that much to me and, really, I’d be absolutely willing to give that money away to go on vacation with her. I'd hate to go without her but if I don't go, I'd lose money myself (I get paid much less to stay here). It's really an issue about money that doesn't even exist to me :( What do I do? Can I convince her to just accept the money? :(

I want to travel with my girlfriend, she wants to work. I offered to give her what she'd earn if she didn't travel with me. ^(Edit 1 hour later: added emphasis and improved phrasing) ^(Edit 2: removed emphasis)

I've been with my girlfriend two years as of next week. We love spending time with eachother, but we've never really travelled outside of where we live before. This is just because we're both university students and I barely make enough money in a week to keep myself above waters. So my gf constantly wants to go away to this one place up the coast which I have been to and fell in love with. Probably my second favourite place to home. She's never been there and whenever we're on semester break wants to go - but again, because I barely have enough cash as it is it's not even an option. To be fair, I always tell her that we'll go up there once I have enough money. However, now I have come into quite a bit of cash due to the governments yearly tax refund. I told my girlfriend this and she was heaps happy for me, and suggested we go away for a few days. I told her I'd love to, but honestly I've never had this much money before and I don't want to spend it all in one go. I'd rather let it accumulate over time rather than going back to living off ~$150 a week (this may seem like a lot to some redditors, but I live in Sydney, Australia and the cost of living here is ridiculous). By the end of the week after spending money on the essentials (petrol, transport to uni, food etc) I'll only have about $50-$60 remaining. So anyway, she was texting me tonight, and I could already tell something was up. So she told me she was about to research some places then remembered the reason why I don't want to go with her and it's making her upset. I told her again that I really want to go, but I don't want to blow all my money in one go. She then said "shows how much time you want to spend with me..." Then she just started going on about how what are we even doing when I don't even want to travel with her. Which is utter bullshit. Of course I want to travel with her. I'm honestly so fucking lost right now. I really want to travel for a few days, but I'm really not up for going back to living off little to nothing. So am I being un-reasonable? She keeps saying I'm breaking her heart by doing this, and I fucking hate myself right now.

gf wants to go away for a few days with me, never had enough cash, now I do, but don't want to spend it all in one go. She's now pissed/depressed. Am I being un-reasonable?

I'm a 23 year old male, my girlfriend is a 21 year old female. We've been dating for almost 8 months. We are both religious Jews. Without getting into any religious debates, one of the things that she wanted in a guy was someone who would go to synagogue every day to pray. When we first started dating I told her that I planned on doing this every day. I lied. Not because I wanted to hurt her. At the time I was really thinking about going every day but at this stage in my life I've decided I don't want to go every day. I really liked her, so I said "yes, I plan on going." A lot of the time she asks me if I went in the morning and I'd say "yeah yeah I went"- even though I didn't. Just so she wouldn't get mad at me. I do go every Sabbath and I try my best to pray at home in the mornings, but she was insistant on saying that she wanted a guy who would go every day. I love her so much and I think telling her that I don't do it every day and don't plan on it will make her break up with me. What do I do? I don't want to tell her that I lied. And I don't want to lose her. (And I don't want to go to synagogue every day...)

My girlfriend wants me to go to Synagogue everyday and I told her I do and I will, even though I don't plan on ever going.

When I got into the office today I dropped my bag down quite forcefully and heard a hissing noise. Concerned, I opened my bag to find that a left over can of cider (from a party at the weekend) had burst open and was spraying everywhere. I quickly pulled it out and opened it hoping it would stop. Noticing the split was near the top I took a large swig to stop the leak. Feeling quite proud of my quick thinking I smiled and turned to take the can to the bin. As I span round I noticed my boss who had just walked in watching me - can in hand, drinking at 8:40am. Co-workers have called me an alcoholic all day.

burst a leftover can of cider in my work bag opened it and took a swig to stop the leak boss caught me drinking at 8:40 labelled an alcoholic at work

I don't have anything particularly scarring (for me), but here goes:   In my line of work people are typically pretty opinionated. They are either very receptive or very hostile. I was called to a reported sexual battery, Which is a huge challenge from the start. You have to approach the victim with absolute sincerity and belief, because it's an impossibly difficult thing for them to share in the first place. Many people don't really remember what happened due to intoxication, drugs, or because they have "blocked" the memory. It's very different from just about any other call. On most cases, if I think your story is bullshit I'll tell you to your face (politely). In this case, no matter how the facts fall I have to be supportive and utterly sincere. For whatever reason I'm really good at that. I can empathize with people and I strive to help them any way I can.   In this particular case the young lady completely shut down (Her friend had called). She was obviously distraught, but did not want my help at all. Based on what she told me she had a terrible experience on a similar case a few years ago. She was left feeling that no one cared and that nothing would get done. I didn't have a chance. I was completely judged before even getting to try. It was a very defeating moment. I knew the chances were low that anything could get done. I realize I'm not a miracle worker, but I didn't even have the chance...thankfully, (after quite some time) I was able to prove myself.  

Called to investigate a rape. Victim had a terrible experience a few years prior and wanted nothing to do with my help. Ended on an unexpectedly positive note.

On the same trend, a couple of years back I went skying in the SW France. My friends had just relocated from around Brest to a chateau there and we went to Ax-les-Themes for a day of fun in the snow. By evening we got pretty hungry, so maybe it influences things a little. We had dinner at a local restaurant and I ordered canard confit and pommes frittes, because hey, I'm in France, so I have high expectations of their cuisine, so I'm not thinking of the calories. Anyway, I get a leg of duck that according to wikipedia is "salted and seasoned with herbs, and slowly cooked submerged in its own rendered fat (never to exceed 85°C/185°F), in which it is then preserved by allowing it to cool and storing it in the fat." along with french fries (called fired potatoes in French that are diced not julienne like I would have expected) - and it was the best dish I ever ate in my life. Literally melt-in-your-mouth delicious! God!... I've ordered the same dish throughout the world, but I never found it so well done like there.

Confit de canard & pommes frittes en Ax-les-Thermes, Midi-Pyrénées, France My favourite food is Creme Brulée, though. I'm gonna look for this restaurant online, because if you stumble by this area, you have to try it!

That thread about the 26-year-old guy who wants to wait until he's in his 30's to have kids with his gf and everyone was telling him it's unfair to expect a women to wait to have kids in her 30's scared me. I'm 28, live on my own, have a shitty car and currently make $600/month at my internship. I pretty much live off my student loans every semester. I won't graduate until Fall 2017 and by that time I'll be 31. Something I really want in my life is to be married and have a family, and I feel like I've fucked myself out of that dream by waiting until my late 20's to go to college and get a degree. I won't be financially stable for another few years, and until then what woman in her late 20's will want to date me? I've tried dating women younger than me but I find that I often can't relate to where they are in life (I did all my partying/drugs/drinking when I was young and now I'm just focused on finishing my engineering degree). The typical age of women in my classes/clubs caps out at like 23 and I feel like that kind of an age gap at this point in my life is huge. Is it too late for me to find a committed partner to have kids with? Should I just wait until I'm 31 and have a job to start dating since no adult woman wants to date a 28-year-old college student who makes -$20,000 a year?

28 and single college student, living off student loans, want to be married and trying for kids in the next 5-8 years. Am I fucked?

Hello, I just started this new restaurant job around a month ago and my paychecks have been the full amount despite the tips I make. In my previous experiences in my other restaurant jobs, we have to claim how much we make in our tips so it can be properly taxed. This usually comes out of our biweekly paychecks. So our paychecks would be around $200-$300 smaller depending on how much tip we make. However at this new job, I started working the day after my interview without signing any paperwork, which is a little odd. My first paycheck was the full amount even though I have made tips in the second pay week after I was done training so I thought it was normal. However, my next paycheck was also the full amount but I have been serving and making tip money the whole pay period. I do write down 100% of what I've made on our little check out sheet and supposedly the manager puts it into the system. I am still relatively new so I am not sure if this is a continuing thing. I just do not want to get in any legal trouble outside of the restaurant. The other is that when we clock in and clock out, it just shows how many hours we have worked that day but we do not have a tangible print out of the hours we work. I have heard that if any of the servers work more than 8 hours, they will move the hours to a day where we have not worked so we do not get overtime. I don't know how true this because my paychecks do not have any hours I worked. It is just a money paycheck with no other statements with it. I have talked to my other coworkers about this getting mixed answers. Some say to leave it and they'll figure it out and just keep the money for myself. Another told me to put some money aside just in case I have to pay the restaurant back. One told me that I was working at the restaurant as a contracted payer and not actually on the restaurant payroll.

My paychecks are not being taxed properly. I am wondering if the fault will lay on the restaurant or on me when it comes to tax reports. Thank you!

My girlfriend and I have been together for just over 2 years now. I am 5' 7" and she is around 5' 5". When we began our relationship I was around 200 pounds and she was around 150. I lifted weights and wanted to gain weight to gain strength. I bulked up to 220 but most of that was in my gut. My girlfriend expressed concern over my health and eating habits but even if she didn't say she wanted me to lose weight for my looks I could tell she did. She also has expressed how she doesn't like men built like trucks. I realized I wasn't happy with myself and I wanted to be sexier for her. I love her dearly. I really do. I want to marry this woman. She has had weight fluctuations and even if they are 15 pounds one way or another they are very noticeable on her. I went down to 175 and over the course of these months our sex has improved and she physically desires me more. But over the months and as I lost weight I started to become less sexually attracted to her. She is still beautiful and I do not love her any less but our eating habits became disgusting to me and her belly became more pronounced. When I asked her if she could lose some weight and I explained why she became very upset. She came very close to leaving me over it a few months ago when it was first mentioned. We just had another fight about it and are in two different rooms. Another thing is sex is very important in our relationship. And she knows what I am very sexually attracted to body wise and I have worked hard to have a body she is extremely attracted to and one that I felt was sexy but when I asked her to do the same she became very upset. What do I do? Am I selfish? Am I wrong?

I asked my girlfriend whos weight has not fluctuated as much as mine to lose weight after I lost weight and became more desirable to her.

Okay, I [F25] fucked up. About a month ago, an ex contacted me out of the blue and asked me out to lunch. He was in town and wanted to catch up. Totally platonic. I told my boyfriend what was going on and he was completely fine with it. So I had lunch with my ex and that was the end of it. However, it seems I set a bad precedent because now my boyfriend [M26] thinks it's cool if we hang out with our exes. We've been in a serious relationship for 10 months and have never dealt with past lovers before this. His ex-girlfriend emailed him last week and apologized for treating him badly when they broke up. She said she "thinks about him all the time" and "regrets" the way things ended. She closed the email saying she hoped they could still be friends. He emailed her back, forgave her, and now they're buddy/buddy. In fact, they even went out for breakfast on Monday. Her birthday's next week and she's already invited him to her party next weekend. He said he's going. I DON'T LIKE THIS. And I can't really say anything because that would make me a huge fucking hypocrite. I don't know what to say/do to solve this. He's been very open and transparent with me, so I don't feel like he's hiding anything. However, I don't like how this girl has suddenly become a good friend again. They texts non-stop as well. The hell am I supposed to do?

I had lunch with an ex. Now my boyfriend thinks it's fine if he hangs out with his ex (who I think still has feelings for him).

It depends on what they are lying about. Will it make a difference if they say their pain is 7 out of 10 when it is clearly less than that? If it isn't a big deal you just report what they tell you in the subjective part of the note and your exam findings in the objective. If we are talking about them trying to fake me out on sensory, motor, or neurologic tests I do Malin gearing tests, which are used to ID false responses. If I still don't agree with what I am seeing I can always order tests like NCVs or EMGs to confirm my suspicion.

Your doctor or chiropractor know when you are faking it because we are taught to identify people who do and we know how to trip you up.

Hey everyone, just looking for some words of advice and I guess a distraction to get out of my head. I met this girl a couple months ago through work and we hit it off right away. We've seen each other a lot since we started dating and things got intimate very quickly, and she dropped the I love you bomb after about a month. I was completely okay with that because my feelings have intensified for her as well. Today, she told me that a guy she met at a bible camp a couple summers ago wants to grab dinner, and that this is a tradition for them when he's back in town. They just get dinner and catch up. At first, my reaction in my head was "well that's totally fine. I trust her, and I have no right this early in a relationship to stop something that she's been doing since before she's met me." But then, she laid down some more info. She says this guy is the first guy she has ever loved. Then, she says that he's going to get married, which kinda threw me off because from his fiance's perspective, why would she allow him going to dinner with a girl he used to love? The only reason they broke up was due to distance, by the way. I told her "Its not the most comfortable idea to me, but its your life and your choice, and I'll be here when you get back if you decide to go." I did not want this to come off as rude or threatening because it wasn't. I appreciated her honesty with me so I was honest with her. She decided to go. When she got back, we went to a little spot on the beach that we found and just sat and talked. I could tell something was off because I turned to her and said "I Love you" and kissed her on the forehead and she didn't respond at all. She seemed quiet, and even only after 2 months together I can tell when something is bothering her. When we got back to her place she gave me a kiss goodnight and said she didn't want me to spend the night, which was weird because she typically wants me to. The next morning when I asked her why she didn't want me spending the night she said "I knew me and John were going to be texting so I didn't want to upset you or scare you." We saw each other that day and everything seemed almost 100%, but still that whole situation has fucked with my mind a lot. So here I am looking for advice on how to cope/if i should be alarmed/what the fuck do I do if anything.

GF of 2 months went to get dinner with a guy she used to be in love with, who is now engaged, then spent the night texting him and told me I couldn't sleep at her place.

K, here’s my situation that has been gone unresolved for several years now. I’m wondering if anyone here has advice. I inherited a few shares from my grandpa when he passed a number of years ago. The shares are in a UK mutual fund called M&G. Years ago I had this investment managed through Dean Witter. Dean Witter was then acquired by Morgan Stanley who now handles my account. I had forgotten about the account for a long time and then a few years ago checked it and decided I wanted to liquidate the shares so pay off some debt and try to go back to school. Now here’s the problem. Morgan Stanley says they aren’t licensed to sell the shares on the London stock exchange (I guess Dean Witter was because they took on the shares to begin with). OK I said, can you give me the information on the holdings so I could transfer them (an account number or some such thing). They say they don’t have that or any information on the investment. However each year a tiny dividend shows up in my morgan stanley account. I suggested that they look at dividend history and follow it back to get an account number. They “couldn’t” do that. I called the Mutual Fund as well but they can’t find anything on my behalf either. I’m worth almost nothing to Morgan so I have had no luck with their chain of command (I don't have a personal broker just their general support team). I’ve made attempts to get this resolved with their people and they say they can’t figure it out or help me. I feel like my money is being held hostage. Small potatoes to them but a big deal for me. If anyone has advice on how to proceed, I would be hugely grateful.

Have some UK shares held by Morgan Stanley in the US which they won’t let me sell or transfer. Need help getting them to move their butts.

Hi Reddit, Me and my husband have been together for 8 years and married for 2. We enjoy what I feel is a very healthy and balanced relationship, and we compliment each other well. We are both very happy. The only thing we have never seen eye to eye with each other is religion. I was brought up as a Christian of the Church of England. He was brought up without any faith and likes to take a more scientific approach to things. It has never really been a problem until now, as we want to now have children but cannot agree with how they should be brought up. For example, it is important to me that my children are baptised. I see it as a beautiful event that has run through many generations of my family. On top of that it opens doors for very good Christian schools in my country. However, his point of view is that he does not like the idea of baptism, he feels it is putting a chosen faith on to a person before they can understand or make any choices about what they want to believe for themselves. Going on from this, I would want my children to be brought up as part of the local community at my church. It is a happy and friendly group of people who support each other and share ideas of morality. While I do accept things like evolution and the Big Bang, believing in God has been a foundation to the way I lead my life and I also want this for my children. I want to share the stories and teachings of my religion. Again, my husband disagrees with this. He is happy for them to be taught about religion, but from a more non-religious or even atheist view point. He has said he would teach them about different religions equally but not in a way that teaches any of them as right. Ultimately his way would leave them without faith, while I think it is a healthy thing to have growing up. I have grown up in a very liberal family. I want everyone to understand that in my children's later life if they chose to reject religion altogether or even take up a different faith I would accept and support their choice. But there is a certain way I want them to be brought up which differs from my husbands and I am worried that there will be a big fall out over this if we cannot compromise. But I can't see a way out. Either they do believe in God or they don't. Where is the middle ground? Please help me find a way to resolve this.

I want my children to be brought up Christian, my husband wants them to be brought up without faith. How can we find a way to balance our wishes?

We have been together for 2.5 years. She's a freshmen in college I'm a junior. I recently transferred to go to school at home and she is at a party school. She is in a soririty and always hangs at frat houses. I know I'm doomed because she feels like she's been "missing out". It really crushes me. She broke up with me the day before new years and made out with someone the next day on new years at her school. The two weeks following that, we got together and had break up sex. However, she won't give me closure on why. It drives me so crazy I text her like 5 times in a row and she never responds. It's so embarrassing and I regret it every time. I consider myself a young successful guy. I tried telling her the guys she's getting into are bimbos and are just trying to get in her pants, but, now I'm thinking maybe that's what she wants. Losing my mind here, any thoughts? I unfollowed her on instagram, but I catch myself checking her twitter. It's so creepy and it's not me. I think it's just a phase because this is just happening.

gf broke up with me, no closure, had break up sex for two weeks and had some of the best times we ever had but may already have someone new at school. Clueless, my mind is.

Sorry for the generic title. Ok, here goes... I started dating my ex when she was a junior in college (22). I was twenty at the time. It initially just supposed to be a summer thing, but became far more serious than either of us expected it would. Then, in February of this year, she broke up with me because she wanted to be single for her semester in Germany. I understood, and I wasn't spiteful or anything, and tried my best to be supportive. I thought it was weird that she wanted to break up in February because she didn't leave until August, but whatever. I was completely lying to myself about being okay with it, and we have talked about it a few times before she left. She would text me occasionally and ask how things were, basic small talk. I would tell her how I felt, and that even though she couldn't ask me to wait for her to come back, I was going to, and if she wanted to stay single after that it was fine. She said more than a few times that she was afraid that I would find someone else, but I told her wouldn't find anyone if I wasn't looking; even if I did and she showed up, I'd probably dump the other one in a second. I've been on a couple dates, but I usually just compared the girls I was out with to her and was generally just not over her yet. The last communication we had was a mass text she sent telling everyone in her contacts that her phone would be shut off for the duration of her trip. That was the first I had heard from her in two months, and I thought it was at best a little unceremonious to leave the country and not at least have a conversation with someone you almost married. I didn't text her back. We're not friends on facebook, but she could look me up easily enough, and she knows my email (and that I don't check it that often, and Facebook would be a lot easier to get ahold of me on). Point being, if she wanted to contact me, she could. What I need advice on is if I should just forget about her, or if I should contact her and let her know I'm still here for her. She's 24 now, I'm 22.

the love of my life left for a semester abroad. I miss her and don't know what to do about it. Thoughts? Should I move on, or wait?

I apologize in advance for the rocky wording, I have been trying to figure out how to get this thought out for a while and it's a little choppy... I am a 25/F and live with my 26/M SO (been together for almost 2 years). I find myself panic ridden thinking about what others expect of me because if I don't make time for my girl friends, they make it very clear to me that they think I have "changed," or I am becoming too "complacent". It seems as though everyone else has this SO/friends balance thing figured out except for me. I love living with my SO, he is my best friend and we are able to do everything together. I am so content coming home to him every night, going to the gym together, cooking dinner together, etc... (Obviously there are nights where we do our own thing, but in general, we both love doing these things together). Now, I have a close knit circle of girlfriends who don't have a similar relationship with their SO as I do (except for 1, who is married now and we don't see her as often unfortunately). Half of them are single, and the other half are in relationships, however those in relationships don't live together and maybe see each other every 3 weeks, if that. Sometimes we hang out all together with SO's but because we are a close group of girls, it's normally just girls nights/hangouts. I feel like they expect me to have a better balance between them and my SO. I see them at the very minimum, once a month, some I see every week or two. I think that's pretty fair? Anyway! My real question is how do YOU balance friends and SO?

I feel like my friends expect me to have a better balance between them and my SO. Looking for advice on how you balance friends and SO.

Went out with some friends in Orange County, CA, to a bar to watch the Angels game (this was about 2003/2004, after they beat my beloved Giants in the World Series). The game ends and I'm sitting with a few friends at a table and behind us are three gals, all very attractive, drinking some Amstel Lights. As I'm drinking the same thing when mine arrives I toast them, they are receptive so I turn my chair around and join their table. Things are going well, all flirty and smiles and light touches to the forearm, when this not-so-bright gal who's with us grabs my arm because she is telling some inane story and wants to show how she ripped this dude's sleeve once and use me as a prop. I tell the gals "this will just be a second", turn so she can tell her idiotic anecdote, and when she's done and I turn back around and Frankie Rodriguez, Juan Rivera, and a few other Angels are now in the bar, hovering over the three gals I was talking to, and took my chair. Seeing how these strong millionaire athletes are now physically blocking me from getting to the girls I give up, sit back with my friends and just shake my head.

Members of the Los Angeles Angels who beat my favorite team in the World Series later stole a table of gals I was flirting with.

I have two children, my daughter 19 and my son 15. Starting with my son, I honestly don't ever see him turning into an adult. Due my family's genetic abnormalities that strike one child in every generation. My brother was hit and my son. They are saddled with brain disorders which symptoms include extreme anger, homicidal/suicidal thoughts, learning disabilities, destructive behavior both internal and external. I have much worry and sadness for him. Now my daughter is a different story all together. She has maintained a 3.5+ GPA since they started grading her. She seems to be the total opposite of both of her parents and her sibling. The moment I seen her as an adult was after my ex, whom she lived with, told her that everyone, her, her sibling, and my ex, was moving from where she had spent the majority of her life growing up and going across the country north to south. I received what started off as a frantic tear filled call from her asking what to do. After calming her and giving her a few things that she would have to do in order to stay where she wanted to stay. She thanked me and said she would get back to me soon. Later that week she calls and has everything setup to stay where she wanted, pay her own way, and start her college education. From that moment on I knew that my ex and I had done our job correctly and that my daughter was an adult.

My son will never be an adult and my daughter surprised me by suddenly showing me she was an adult in the span of less than a week. Edit: Added few words. Formatting

A lot of the dudes here are being pretty harsh and really rubbing it in but all I can say is just ignore em. I feel you, I know how hard and frustrating it is trying to find a "real" job and it makes sense that when pickings are so slim and competitive that you would be eager to jump on the first offer. You should be proud of yourself for finally leaving that place because you know you are better than that. It may have been 5 years but what is done is done and it was a life experience. You cant really argue that you didn't learn at least one lesson from it. And at least sticking with one place for 5 years will look good on your resume.

Don't beat yourself up, and remember your mistakes so you don't make them twice. That's what growing is. Keep truckin on and good luck. :)

Beginning: September 7, 2010 I go for my annual eye exam (annual eye exams are stupid anyways, my prescription hasn't changed in the past 5 years, and I am experiencing no problems from my current contact prescription which is [Acuvue Advance, -5.00, 8.3, in both eyes, for those interested]) I am short on cash, and I saw a sign up Exams for $45 at Dr. Bizer's Vision World, not my normal optometrist, but it was about $50 cheaper so I went to good ol' Bizer's. This overweight, coffee-breath doctor did the standard eye exam filled with many "which is better, 1 or (insert clicking noise) 2." So it turns out that the Doctor absolutely 100% believes I need to change my prescription. He writes down this bullshit prescription -4.75 in the right eye and -5.50 in the left and changed the brand of contacts to something I can't remember. I think this is weird, but disregard it and say to myself, "God dammit, if I want Acuvue, then Acuvue is what I'll get" The Middle: Nov 2010-Jan 2011 I spend alot of time in Germany and get my contacts there, without a legal need for any type of prescription, I simply tell them the strength, diameter, and all that bullshit, but since I didn't really like having two different prescriptions for either eye, I told them my old prescription with Acuvue which I stated above. Life goes on, not one single problem in the seeing department. The Climax: Today Feb 17, 2011 My german supply of contacts has ran out, time to go get some more I say. Actually the contacts I was wearing were already 3-4 weeks over-used. I enter the optical store at Wal-Mart and the man working there is asleep, so I strenly say "Hello" and wake him from his slumber. I say "I need a box of Contacts, I want them Acuvue Advance -5.00" He looks at my presciption and says "I can't give you Acuvue because it isn't on your presciption." He proceeds to inform me to return to the Doctor and get him to change it. Fair enough I say, a little annoyed but he wouldn't budge. I visit the doctor at Bizer's and speak to the supervisor and tell her the situation. She say's it will be $10 to change the presciption. "UNACCEPTABLE" I exclaim. "$10" she says, again. "GET THE DOCTOR" I say. Doctor comes and says "$10" "NO" says I. This goes back and forth for a little while, and since I am a broke bastard, I couldn't really afford to pay the $10. The Conclusion: Today, again same date as today The nice Kenyan doctor does me a favor and writes the prescription (with a trial pair) and I get my damn Acuvue Advance contact lenses with the -5.0 prescriptions.

the salespeople in the optometry field suck, and the optometrists themselves aren't so bad. don't know why I felt compelled to post this to reddit, i just did.

The excact reverse happened to me and a couple of friends the other day. A friend and I keeps doing these borderline pranks to each other, some slightly over the edge, so sometimes we just don't believe each other out of fear of being filled with shit. The other day I was at a club with this friend of mine, and suddenly I met an old school friend who I have not seen i years. He happens to be deaf, and I suppose you all know were this is going... I introduce the two of them, and due to the club being very loud, we pretty much all are without hearing. It took me solid 20 minutes to convince my friend that he was actually deaf, and that I wasn't just shitting him. With my deaf friend standing besides, fully capeble of mouth reading, this was extremely ackword as my other friend allmost turned agressive for me not stopping "the prank"

My friend insisted my other deaf friend was just a part of a bad performed scam. Insulted me for solid 20 minutes before realising the situation.

I work in a restaurant that has two floors, and several side rooms and offices scattered through the building. It's part of procedure at night to have one person do a check of everything, all those rooms and the second floor, the basement (etc) and if it takes more than 15 minutes the other person is told not to go looking for them, but to call the police. Well, my friend lost the flip and had to do the late night screen while I was counting my till at one of the tables by the stairs. He goes up and before I realize it he's spent 10 of the 15 minutes just on one floor so I decide to call the police when he doesn't answer my calls. I tell them to come in the front door and I go unlock it for them. What felt like about 10 minutes later my coworker is being walked down the stairs by what looks like some sort of junkie with a pocket knife. He demands the till, and my coworker keeps telling him that he doesn't have to do this. I step back from my till, and he grabs it and runs out the front door only to get smoked by a cop and half a dozen cops jump in and beat the ever living shit out of him.

version: We got jumped after close at work but our policy to not go looking for a missing person saved the both of us and the guy got caught

I work at a garage myself, and am quite frequently placed in the situation where a person comes in for an oil change, and i end up recommending $100 in other stuff. The harsh truth is that in more instances that a non mechanic would think, there really are $100 worth of other things going on with your car that you may not know about. Ask any seasoned mechanics about the things theyve seen roll into a garage that the owner had no idea about. ive seen brake systems so bad i dont know how the car made it into the shop. ive seen bad alignments on cars that had the inside edges of tires worn to the steel belt (thats a very common one) all the while the driver had no clue. For example, Its quite often somebody hasn't had their antifreeze flushed out in a few years. In my opinion, any decent garages should be checking all other fluids before doing an oil change (i've uncovered quite a few blown head gaskets that way). That coolant flush is an $85 service (mostly in labor) right there. While a bad mix of antifreeze isn't exactly a matter of life and death to a car, its something that isn't a bad idea to take care of. That's where a lot of people feel threatened by garages. They think we are trying to tell them this stuff MUST be done. I cant say how most other garages work, but where i work we simply recommend other services for the better knowledge of the customer. As i stated earlier, i've uncovered quite a few blown head gaskets that the customer had no idea about. I'd like to think that by me checking other fluids in their car, I saved them from a possible catastrophic breakdown later on. So instead of always assuming that mechanics are out to screw you, try to realize that we all know people and maybe even ourselves have been screwed by automobile issues, and just want to help you nip something in the bud before its a big problem. One way to help alleviate your fears is to ask the technician to show you the problem himself BEFORE you give him the authorization to go ahead and do it. And remember you as the owner have the right to at any time pull the plug and tell them not to turn another single bolt on the car. I personally guide my customers out their cars and have them get under the lift with me on a daily basis and help them understand whats going on.

consider the fact that some mechanics may actually know what they are talking about, and want to help you prevent bad things that we ourselves have had happen and learned the hard way.

well my name was supposed to be Davon but i guess the nurse who wrote that down had parkinsons and wrote Dawn as my name..my dad changed it later but only on my birth certificate but my ss stayed the same. they lost my card but knew my number so i never knew until i tried to do a fafsa and it wouldnt go through....

my name was originally Davon but was recorded as Dawn and later changed anyway..took 18 years for anyone to realize my ss info was never changed

I live in a county that is 70% one specific religion. It creates a polarized demographic, where people are either (1) extremely pious [even for me, and I'm practically Ned Flanders] or (2) uneducated alcoholics with tattoos. No middle ground. I really don't fit into either box, which makes dating challenging. Add in our generation's illusion that there's a "perfect" partner out there, and the illusion of unlimited choice, and you can see why after 80 dates over five years girls have rejected me time and time again. Even though I have a stable job, college degree, paid cash for a brand new car, reasonably good looks, etc. Girls who attend the nearby university have a reputation for becoming "princesses." They are generally white, upper-middle-class, straight-As and had everything in their life work out quite smoothly for them. Since they always get what they want, they aren't willing to settle for a guy like me who isn't a hot-shot lawyer or a guy who spins lies about "preparing for medical school." As a result, guys (who aren't dripping in cash) become too picky and go on too few dates, because they are burnt out of girls rejecting them. Since some of these girls don't get asked out a lot, they stress out and treat a second date like a marriage proposal, so they reject the guy because they didn't fall in love on the first date. I'm not sure how much of this is common, or just unique to my area because of its religious nature. Anyway, I've tried to break the cycle by asking out lots of girls, but it hasn't worked yet. I'm approaching age 30 pretty quickly, but hey, at least I can wipe my tears with cash.

Our generation is messed up, and while I consider religion a good thing generally, it's really not helping the local dating scene. I want a woman in my life, but her delay has helped me financially.

Stop making this a crusade. Are words really that hurtful to you that you can't imagine just getting through high school and forgetting about them forever? Don't start some moronic vengeance mission - it isn't illegal to make fun of people. Just grit your teeth and get through it, then forget about him after graduation. He isn't "attacking" anyone, he's posting words you don't like. A bully you should be worried about is one that physically beats you, not one that isn't even clever enough to come up with something better than "kill yourself". I know you're probably going to start this crusade anyway, or attempt to, but remember it just hurts everyone when you try to censor a peer, a minor, by trying to get the law or authorities involved.

These are the years of your life that will be gone the fastest. Grin and bear it and find new groups of friends post-graduation. Don't get up in arms over words. Over twitter words , which are about as important as a bucket of diarrhea.

So, I recently managed to get over a failed transition from friendship to romantic interests. I was strangely devastated this time since I was experiencing a lot of stress at home and didn't really have the extra energy to deal with this. Note: all of my romantic relationships have stemmed from long-term friendships. I'm finally ready to try again after an 8 month break from dating. There's this girl in a few of my classes who has caught my eye a few times over the years, but I never asked her out because I don't really know why. My big reservation right now has to do with my parent's. They've affected my past relationships, and I seem to go through the same thing over and over with them. I always chose girls I thought they'd approve of, and they did until they realized we weren't just going out for one night. This time, I know they won't approve of this girl. She's nice as anything and really likes me, but she lives with her grandmother. Isn't a big deal to me, but my parents think anyone in an "unconventional" living situation is messed up and trouble in the making. They want me to marry up, but I don't think socioeconomic status should dictate who I date. I'm 18 for goodness sake, I have at least 10 years before I should even think of marriage. Sorta a long background story, but here's the question. Have any of you been in a similar situation? If so, what did you do?

Coming off long break from dating and I know my parents won't approve of my crush. Has anyone had the same experience who would like to share?

Both of us have just gotten out of long term relationships, so we both agreed on the outset of keeping things slow. We have hung out a few times and have gotten physical. There is cuddling, long talks, etc. My problem is that I feel like I am developing oneitis for her - that I am becoming more invested than she is. I hang on to my phone waiting to hear from her, I can't relax until I know we have set plans for next time, I get anxious when she doesn't text back right away. I overanalyze our text messages and I am afraid that one day she will wake up and want to end things. It's bad. I am trying to hang out with friends, go to the gym...do anything to keep my mind off her. But she is always present and it is starting to drive me insane! What are some good ways to just relax and "live in the moment"?

Girl and I both got out of long term relationships, agreed to take things slowly. We have been physical and I know that we like each other - but I am slowly becoming more invested in her than she. Feels like oneitis!

Note: Throwaway because real account has real names associated. Last year I applied to transfer out of my University that I've been at for 2 years. There were a bunch of reasons why but I won't get that much into them. I later found out that I got accepted to all the schools I applied to and readily planned my next year away from my home state. Summer came and I made it a priority to say bye to everyone that mattered to me. One person in particular, lets call him Jake, really caught my attention. We were decent friends up until the summer but as I started to hang out with him more, the more I fell for him. The bad part is he is "straight", but hear me out. The last day that I was going to see him I told him about myself (I'm semi-closeted) and we literally spent the whole night talking and cuddling and long story short, it was the best night of my life. We then said our goodbyes as I had to leave but we still kept in touch. During my trip to my new school we talked daily. We got to know each other more and it came to the point where he was questioning whether he wanted to be with me or not (he's deeply religious). I told him I wasn't going to force him and that he needed to make his decision. Fast forward a couple weeks and he told me that he didn't feel the same way anymore. Fast forward a couple more weeks and I'm going to back to visit for my break. I stayed with him, obviously, and basically spilled my guts out to him about how much he meant to me. We ended up doing "things" in his bed. The next morning was normal, we talked about it and things seemed fine. The problem in all of this is that there is a girl. He likes her, she likes him you get the picture? I'm extremely jealous of her as he hangs out with her a lot and I can't because I'm thousands of miles away. That's the gist of it so I'll just cut to the problem. Recently, I've been just thinking about how he would be happier without me; how he would be happier with this girl rather than me. I'm struggling with whether I should let him go or keep fighting for him. He was the one that made me like my home again, he was the one that made me regret my decision of transferring, and now he's the one I fell in love with. I'm trying to follow my heart but I really don't know what I should do... If I fight for him I'll most likely transfer back but if I let him go then I'm staying here... There is so much more to the story but right now I have no idea what to say but any advice would be great!

Fell in love with one of my friends, we had a thing then we didn't, but then we did stuff, but there's this girl, and now I'm questioning whether to fight for him or not.

My friend argues that a professor could easily offer to give a struggling student an "A" in the class if she would sleep with him once. He thinks that there would be no repercussions because even if the female accused the teacher of sleeping with him, she would be 18 and therefore responsible. Also, he thinks that his job would remain secured because even if the girl told her parents or the teacher, there would be no evidence saying that he even offered to make such a deal with her. I think this is ridiculous to believe, but now I would like to know for sure. Anyone have a better understanding of this?

Would a male teacher not see repercussions to asking an 18+ female student for sex in exchange for good grades? Would his job be safe even if he was acquitted of charges?

Mine kind of pales in comparison to many of these other stories, but it took place in 6th grade (it was a rough year): I had 2-3 really close friends from elementary school. I was so happy when we had the same teacher in middle school and I was extremely excited for the trip we had later in the year where we got put in groups with a few people (that we request) and do stuff for 5 days. So, that time rolled around. My friends had become "popular", and I struggled to keep up with them. They could all afford $50 shirts and $100 jeans (6th grade, mind you. We were still growing). I was stuck in my JCPenney and Kohl's clothes. I liked them, but being a young girl struggling to fit in, I felt awkward. Anyway, "we" befriended this one girl who obviously had enough money to buy a lot of cool clothes. She was athletic, funny, "cool", etc. A lot better than I saw myself. Let's call her "Emily". She, my 2 friends (let's call them "Maddy" and "Cass"), and another girl and I were all in a group. The first 2 days were fine and dandy, but the 3rd day fucking sucked. Let's get something straight here: I am not coordinated. I do track because I can't kick balls, throw balls, or hit balls with bats. Anyway, on the 3rd day, we were doing separate activities for "free time" with our friends. My 2 close elementary friends and I were kicking a soccer ball around. I usually missed it or kicked too hard or whatever. I felt really bad and embarrassed. So then comes Emily. She poked fun at me, I didn't mind. I thought we were friends. Eventually, she, Maddy, and Cass stopped kicking to me and just made fun of me. Sensitive young me felt left out and sat at a park bench and cried. Thankfully, my current best friends were the ones that consoled me. But the 3 bitches didn't stop there. Once we got back to our town, they started bullying me through AIM, at school, and everything. I spent every day crying. They turned a bunch of people (people I hadn't ever talked to) against me and I was teased a lot . I was teased for my clothes, my hair, my intelligence (I focused on school more than them), and my family. I was called an "it", an ugly whore that would never have any friends/boyfriends, a mistake, etc. Those skanks ruined middle school for me. They are part of the reason I have low self-esteem 5 years later. They were brutal.

Close friends from elementary school teamed up with a rich, trendy, cool girl and teased me hard enough to leave an impact 5+ years later.

Hey guys, first post...need some help. I was at my last job for 6 years, and was in the last year 'promoted' to be groomed to take over from the MD, after about 12 months of realizing he was never going to leave a great opportunity came up at another company (more money, bigger company, more potential, new challenges etc), so moved across. I've been there 6 months and the job is ok, the company is ok too (a lot different from what was expected) but in the meantime the MD at my previous company left, and the president of the board approached me to say the job is basically mine if I want it...to which I said I'd be willing to have the discussion (I know about 80% of what the job would entail, was there for 6 years so know the business back to front + all its challenges etc). I told them they'd need to make me an offer, they approached me, I know what he was earning & will know whether they are serious by the offer they make... In all honesty, both that job & the one I moved to, are really just that jobs, I don't particularly love either of them (they both have their moments that I can say I enjoyed, but would never say I loved either of them, so figure if I wake up everyday feeling MEH about the job I'm going to...I may aswell be doing it for double the money - which is potentially what the offer they will send me is... Now in the meantime, instead of making me an offer, they are now saying I need to submit my CV, go for an interview, and yadda yadda yadda...but feel that they approached me, they know me, my work, my capacity, ethic & drive & if they have another candidate, they need to interview that person, and if they feel that person is better then make the offer to them. But I don't have time to waste to dick around on interviews etc like I'm actually applying for the job, when they basically came to me & said we need you, we want you...Not oh hey you're great we want you to apply for the job cause if they had told me from the beginning they wanted to apply for the job I would've said, sorry guys, I have a job thanks.

I had a job, took another job, got offered my old bosses job, now they want me to follow whatever process they are using to apply for a job they basically offered me. what would you do

I live in an old apartment building on the first floor and just got a treadmill to keep running through the winter. The floors and walls are such that when I am running on it the house sort of shakes a little every time my foot comes down. The best time for me to work out is early in the morning (around 6AM). I assume that my upstairs neighbor can hear and possibly feel me running. One thing you should know about my neighbor is that he is SUPER sensitive about some things, and not others. An example would be that he threw a fit over having a small Vespa scooter in the backyard, but has never complained when we have backyard parties with an open fire into the wee hours of the morning. Should I preempt a problem by emailing him and asking if it is a problem, or should I wait it out to see if I drive him crazy enough to complain? I am worried that if I ask he will just say its a problem even if he can't hear it.

Have a new possibly very loud treadmill that I would like to run on early in the morning, not sure how to approach my sometimes super sensitive neighbor about it.

Reddit, I live in a city but not down town. My neighborhood is all single family houses and some people over time have added parking pads or drive ways on their property. The street is a two way street but there is only parking on one side. Parking didn't used to be an issue however a couple of house that were for sale sold. Here is my problem/question. My neighbor (not a new one, has lived there for a while) has a drive way that is more than big enough for both of their cars. They would have to park one behind the other so that wanting to remove the first car would require backing the second car out of the drive way. Is it wrong for me to be pissed off because they park one car in the street and one car in the drive way? Does it make it more of an issue that they will park one car on the street and not move it for days? As of now their one car has been in front of my house for two weeks and their drive way has been empty every day when I get home from work.

Neighbors park their car in the street on a two way street that only allows parking on one side. Am I crotchety old man for it bugging me every day that they don't park both their cars in their drive way?

Where I'm from people have this sort of orthodox regard to relationships, especially for the more intimate ones. I really like this girl who's 3 years older than me, more mature, accomplished and obviously, better looking. I've known her for years as a family friend, she's the daughter of my father's good friend. For the last 3-4 years I've only been able to communicate with her on Facebook. I get the feeling that she's trying really hard to make it appear as if she's ignoring me, there has been quite a few occasions. Painfully obvious in fact. Perhaps she knows I like her and wants me to get the hint and f'off. I would understand that. There was though this one time when I'd opened a blog and had asked her to check it out. She did not reply for days then, the very day I take it off she replies asking me why I'd done so. But strangely again insisting that she didn't really check it out. Should I be hopeful about her? I know I could be way out of my league here.

There's this girl I like. She's older and I'd like to know how I could get her proper response on whether she'd want us to get to know each other better.

I just bought a bunch of chicken breasts and was wondering if it would be okay to do something. Normally I separate the breasts into separate zip-lock baggies and freeze them, taking one out at a time when I want to eat it. I let it thaw out before adding whatever I to marinate them with to the baggie and letting them sit like that in the fridge for a few hours/overnight. This has worked fine but i am curious as to whether the opposite would be fine. Putting the breasts in the bags to marinate for a while then freezing them. When I want to eat them I'd just take the bag out of the freezer and thaw them and they'd be ready to cook. I figure it would save a little time to just marinate them all at once. However I'd rather not make the chicken taste awful so I'm asking here to see if it's okay to do this.

is it better to: freeze -> thaw -> marinate -> cook marinate -> freeze -> thaw -> cook or at least would the latter end up tasting bad?

Greetings PF, My wife and I are currently on a company-sponsored house-hunting trip for the new job I'm transferring into. We have already been pre-qualified by several lenders, and pre-approved by one. I would like to get the best possible mortgage in terms of interest rates and closing costs. We will (hopefully) be putting in an offer on a place this week, or within 2 months if this trip is unsuccessful (they will put us in temporary housing if we don't have anything lined up). My plan: Put in and get accepted on offer. Determine the exact total amount we will be putting down to cover both closing costs and down payment. Email/contact all of the lenders that I have been in touch with: "As you know from our prior conversations, we are in the process of buying our first home. We have found and agreed to buy a house for $X. We have $Y to spend total on a down payment and all closing costs. What is the best offer that you could give us for a 30 year fixed mortgage? As you know, we have been in contact with many lenders. We will be comparing your offer to theirs, and will be basing our decision on the total monthly payments based on a fixed value of $Y for total closing and down payment costs." Lenders send me all of their offers. Choose the one with the lowest monthly payment. Is this a good plan? Can I reasonably expect this many lenders to play ball? I'm assuming that I will have to apply for a loan from each lender, which may incur some application fees. Has anyone else done this before? Thanks for reading! or,

Going to email all of the lenders: "I have $X for total cost to close (down payment + closing costs + escrow, etc). What monthly payment can you give me for this $Y house, btw, you are in competition with others". Good idea?

We met early August and started dating in September. We clicked instantly because we had so many things in common such as being redditors, liking GoT and video games, having similar experiences with depression etc. So I didn't realize how different our political views were until now. [WARNING: this part is very rant-ish] He's very conservative when it comes to things like feminism and doesn't believe women are oppressed (in the U.S.). He also thinks that sexual harassment is okay as long as the harasser is an attractive person, because he says he wouldn't mind an attractive girl sexually harassing him or raping him. In terms of economics, we had an argument about this where he thinks poor people chose to be poor because they could have worked harder or tried to get a better job, and that the rich people deserve their income because most of them worked hard. He thinks luck has nothing to do with it and that as long as you work hard, you will become rich. I'm not gonna deny that I'm thinking of breaking up because his views have been irking me these past few weeks. Another thing that's been bothering me is that I told him there are some things you shouldn't say to people, but he said he doesn't care. Like some examples are how he said "Idc how a girl looks, all my past ex's weren't good-looking" or when we were talking about how I look a bit like his sister he said, "Except prettier" so I gave him a look and he said "just kidding...well, actually...".

His conservative view on wealth and feminism has been annoying me. Also he's insensitive when it comes to saying things he shouldn't say. I've confronted him about the "things you shouldn't say" but not about the other things. Am I being too harsh on him?

Hi! I really can't ask any of my RL friends about this without sounding like a spaz (which I kind of am), so I thought I'd ask you guys for advice. I haven't been on a date/looking for a relationship since my first and last relationship ended two years ago. It was not a serious relationship, I cared for him but was aware that we had very different goals in life and we both had issues that prevented us from connecting fully in the relationship, for him, emotionally, for me, sexually. The reason I haven't been on a date in so long is because I have had very bad (and few) sexual experiences. My first time I was raped, then I had bad sex with my ex because I wanted to make him happy and thought it didn't matter because I wasn't a virgin anymore anyway. So, as you can imagine, I really needed to take some time off dating and learn to respect myself more and figure out what I wanted from a relationship. To be honest, I was also just scared to date after the experiences I had had. I really want to try dating again. I think I've worked through the issues that were keeping me from doing so. Now, for the first time in two years, I have a crush on a guy [21M]. I even think he might "like" me back. But I have no clue what I'm doing. At all. And I am really nervous generally. Anyway, we went on a date (I initiated the conversation on FB planning to ask him out, he then asked me out (we already knew each other and had talked before hand, so I figured doing it over FB wasn't too weird; I don't run into him often so I didn't know how else to get in touch with him)) Thursday evening, got dinner, and generally had a good time, or at least I did. Since then, I have texted him once, he responded, and we chatted for a bit. I would like to go on a second date, but I don't know if I should wait for him to ask me, or if I should ask him. Since I have initiated both conversations, is it his turn to ask me out again? Or is it my turn to ask him out since he asked me out the first time? Or does it just not matter and I'm overthinking this? On a somewhat related, but separate note, I'm still incredibly nervous at the thought of having sex, even though I find this guy attractive. How long do people normally wait before having sex (I know I won't be ready for quite a while)? Of course, I will discuss this with him before/if we become sexually involved, but does anyone have any thoughts about how to broach this topic?

I have not dated in ages because of past issues with sex, and I'm really nervous about dating in general now that I'm trying it again. I don't know who should ask who out, and I'm nervous about having/talking about sex.

So... My boss is probably the most laid back, easy going, chilled out boss in the world. I know that I am ABSOLUTELY BLESSED to have her as my boss. Although, as of late, she's been VERY SLOPPY. She doesn't give 2 shits about her job anymore, has constantly threatened to leave, and has recently graduated with a degree in business. WELLLLL, Today, she called in sick (no big deal), and the administrator and owner of the building pulled me aside and asked if I would be interested in her position? I respectfully said it would be something i'd have to consider, and that i'd get back to them. SOOOO NOW, i've been given a task of the manager, and I think it's in order to see how well i play the role of Manager. MY QUESTION IS...Should I do an outstanding and efficient job? Or, should I do give a mediocre effort? BTW: Her job pays $35 an hour, while mine (As her assistant) only pays much lower. ( I was told, i'd be making $35)

Boss is wanting to leave the position, called in sick, Admin and Building owner ask me if i'd like her position... They are assessing me by giving me a task of hers.

I was removed from my abusive home and family (think r/raisedbynarcissists) by CPS. They arranged for me to move in with my aunt and uncle. For the first few days they were kind of cold to me, but it was likely stress from coming back from their extended holiday and having to suddenly deal with a new kid moving in. That's okay, understandable enough. I managed to get on good terms with them by being studious and generally entertaining. I did my share of the chores and tried not to trouble them. During this time, my uncle mentioned casually that my hair was too long and I was dropping hair all over the place. We were still on good terms. Then came the time where my uncle asked me again, emphasizing more on cutting my hair shorter. I tried to communicate that it would be very tough for me ( I'm face blind) to recognize myself in the mirror if my hair was changed. Hence, I tried to compromise by suggesting a shorter version of my hair. His response was pretty much that my condition didn't matter and that I should just cut my hair. My aunt protested this and said my hair was just fine. Then came the incident. Now, my uncle and aunt had to sign a (probably not legally binding) contract that stated very firmly no contact with my parents. My uncle brought them to see me in a public space, and I snappepd, screamed a few vulgarities at them and ran away from them and my wheelchair. I reported the incident to my Child Protection Officer for a breach of contract, and she came to the house and talked to my uncle in private and then me later on. From what I gather, it was basically " pinky promise you won't break the contract again". My aunt also victim blamed me for this whole fiasco and got super angry when I said I wasn't sure if I ciuld forgive my uncle. Forward to now, a few days later- my aunt won't speak to me unless absolutely necessary, claims she has no time for me, is rude to me, and is a huge contrast fron the aunt in the start who happily showed me pictures of her trip in the US and Canada. My uncle is a little better, but I haven't gotten any form of mention of the contract breach or apology for traumatizing me again. He will still speak to me but far less than before. I've stopped trying completely to be nice to them. We eat dinner together in silence. I lock myself in my room and study. My Child Protection Officer was notified of this, but she says I will have to stay for a week or two till they find me another relative or children's home or hostel? I dont know why they hate me now! Is it because I reported them?

I was removed from narcissistic parents home, and placed with aunt and uncle. They breached the safety contract of non contact with my parents for me and I reported them. Now they won't speak to me. Was I wrong for reporting them?

I'm no medical expert but facial hair growth is most definitely connected to testosterone levels in the body, which is why most women will not grow facial hair other than slight amounts of top lip fuzz unless they have unbalanced testosterone levels. I don't think that there should be any relationship between the right teste and right side of the face, and if anything I would have thought it would be right nut=left side of face because of the twist in the spinal cord (which is why a major stroke on the left side of the brain will paralyse the right side of the body. However if there is a relationship it is possible - though unlikely - that some damage has occurred and decreased testosterone output, so I'd be seeing a GP if you are concerned.

it probably isn't related but I'd see a real doctor because they will be able to tell you for sure, and ruptured nuts are no joke.

Let me try to put this in the right words: Crazy + codependent + no understanding of boundaries + refusal to fix anything or listen to advice when you are actually a very intelligent person! A friend of mine would call me at all hours, disregarding work or school or basic boundaries. He woke me up at 3 am on a school night when I am living on campus in the next city over to tell me how he was trying to wake up our mutual friends because he was upset. He would make me talk to him for hours when I was with friends I couldn't see very often. I asked him repeatedly to get a counselor, and he either wouldn't or he would go 1 or 2 times, say he was better, and not go back. He would then express that he wasn't better and needed to see a counselor. Almost every time. After about 2 years of this I just said no. My life was being increasingly sucked up by his issues when he refused to seek healthy alternatives. I didn't completely cut him out of my life but I did set very strict boundaries. We would end up not talking for weeks because of them. He's gotten some good help since and he's actually nice to hang out with now.

He had severe codependency and social anxiety that he tried to put on my shoulders for 2 years. Closest I've ever come to cutting someone out of my life.

So first off I'm 25F 5'2" CW 240, GW ~150. A little background, about 1.5 years ago I was at 180 and pretty happy with my weight. I was very active, I was a zookeeper so walked 10+miles daily, and regularly lifted and carried 70+lbs. I was also an avid horse back rider, riding 3-4 times per week plus cleaning stalls etc. Well in short succession I quit my job, my horse had to be euthanized, and I moved across the country to CO with my bf. Since then the lifestyle change (I'm now a nanny), mild/moderate depression, and legal weed and so many delicious craft beers added up to a 90+lb gain. Well I'm trying to get back to a healthier weight and lifestyle, but I've never really worked out/dieted before so I'm a little out of my element here. I've been going to the gym 5x per week for the past month or so, but haven't done much dieting wise. What I do at the gym now is 30-45 min of cardio, 20-30 minutes of weights rotating days between arms, legs, and abs, and 10ish minutes of stretching for a cool down. Diet-wise, I'm now looking into keto, low carb type diets (thanks FAQ!) but again, I've got no real experience there so any advice is welcome. So what I'm looking for here is just any advice, tips, or help on what I should be doing at the gym and in the kitchen to help me get where I want to be. Thank you in advance!

Had some huge lifestyle changes and gained a bunch of weight. Now I'm trying to work out and diet to get back on track, but need some advice since I don't really know what I'm doing.

Okay, I know there are gonna be so many people on here defending Skylar, but I have to say the same thing. Every time she's annoying or bitchy, it's completely justifiable. In Season 1, she's a really concerned wife. In the first part of Season 2, she's even more concerned after he disappears, then she stops trusting him and leaves him. In Season 3, she practically hates him after finding out the truth, then shuts him out of the family and has an affair. I think that all of her actions here are realistic, because she knows that his associates are very dangerous, and she's thinking of her children. And in her mind, why not have an affair? But after she lets him back in to the family, she understands that some of his actions are justifiable and tries to help him. In Season 4, she becomes his money laundering accomplice and really goes in to business with him. All the while she knows that at any moment he could get caught and her whole family could be destroyed, that's why she's so uptight, because now she's definitely going down with him. So once Walt is in real danger, he shows that he will protect his family even after she fucks up. But she also sees that he is capable of murder, even if it is his only way out, so she's scared of him. (Actually I think what scares her the most is when he says "I won" she realizes that this is still some sort of competition.) So Season 5 ends up with her getting the kids away from him again, and ending up a prisoner in her own home. I don't know how you can find her annoying in Season 5, because she's run out of option and can't do anything anymore except wait for him to die. Once he says he'll quit the meth game, she's happy and believes that her family will move on super rich and only have to put the past behind them.

I really don't understand why people hate her so much, because in her circumstance, everything she does is either completely justified, or it's her making bad but realistic decisions.

You know... I'm a black woman, and some of the most amazing people who have supported me through thick and thin, and who have helped me out when my own family would walk away have been white.

If you can judge a wise man by the color of his skin then mister, you're a better man than I. Decency isn't bound by the melanin content of one's skin.

I would have to say one of mine would be, pushing everyone away when I noticed they were getting too close to me. For example, In high school (few years back), I had this girl I would always talk to and felt comfortable around. We met each other in the same class and continued on talking for about over a year or so. When it came close to senior prom, I thought I was going alone.. Until I got a letter telling me to go on some scavenger hunt. I thought it was from a friend at the time messing with me somehow. I ended up going to 5 different class rooms finding different clues. It led up to me going to a staircase we had in the middle of our school. There she was, standing there.. beautiful. Holding up a sign that said, "Prom?". I panicked. Everyone stared at me. (A little after all of this happened I found out I have Social Anxiety Disorder) I walked away... I know, I was a SS that day. I never spoke to her again. I hope one day we could repair whatever it was we had. I think about myself going back in time and slapping the shit out of that kid I was. I just noticed she's now engaged to a teacher we had in that same high school.

Girl made a special scavenger hunt that led to her asking me to prom. I could open up to her about anything. I got freaked out and panicked.

First, it's totally OK for your parents to pay for college. There are a few comments in here about "mommdy and daddy paying for college" - this isn't a bad thing. Fuck those people, my parents paid for my college and while I'm extremely grateful to them I don't think it makes me a better or worse person because of it. That being said, you should respect the amount of money that they're paying (even moreso if it's your own money). When you're 20 years old you don't really understand the value of money, and how much things cost. College is fucking expensive, it usually requires saving for years and years in advance. Respect your parents more and get your ass to work. If you don't like psychology, then switch your major - you've only been in there a year...I didn't set my major up until I was midway through my second year. You have plenty of time to pick something you like, just try to pick something that's also applicable in the real world. College is about getting you a good job in a field you want. Under no circumstances should you stop going to school if you have the ability to stay. That is the ultimate cop out. You will also find yourself behind the curve of your generation when entering the job market, and that means you will set yourself up for a shitty career, unless you get outrageously lucky. The bottom line is this: Pick a major you like, and WORK YOUR LAZY ASS OFF. That doesn't mean you can't have fun too (college was actually one of the best times of my life) but this is where you're going to have to learn how to grow up, work independently without your parents forcing you, and learn some responsibility. Study. Stop being so fucking lazy, it's a slap in the face to the people who have fed and clothed you for two decades. Also, people are saying that it's ok to take time off. That's fine if you really need to, but the sentiment I am getting from you is that you don't need time off, you just aren't applying yourself. You've been given a tremendous gift in getting college paid for, and you should take advantage of it while you can.

The fastest train in the world travels around 250 mph. If you got hit by it, you'd probably get vaporized into a fine red mist.

Although I am middle class now, the only way that happened is cause my dad worked at McDonalds and Pizza hut at the same time, and my mom worked at a nursing home (we came to the U.S. as refugees). My dad knew that if we had stayed in the apartment he could quit one of his jobs, but made sure we moved into a house in a neighborhood with a good public school so me and my brother could get a good education, and have a better chance of going to a good college. They didn't take food stamps cause they were too proud, as my brother didn't buy his lunch for the reduced price of 10 cents (although I did, didn't give a fuck! Got kids to stop hassling me for being poor after I pulled the old ground and pound and couple that pushed me too far). When my brother was in college my parents had a simi successful small business (this was the only part of my childhood I wasn't super poor, lasted about 4 years), so he couldn't get all grants and government loans for school he had gotten the year before. My parents were happy to pay for the rest out of pocket so he didn't have to take out bank loans, until the middle of the year when the .com bubble burst a lot of small business in the technology field and he had to pay his tuition on a credit card (took a while to get rid of that super coercive debt). No my mom babysits and my dad works at a factory making 14 bucks an hour (had to work his way up to that, been working there for a while). However my brother rents them his old condo that he bought once he graduated college and lives in a big house he bought for his family once he started one. They used the money from the sale of their home to start a retirement fund. I also do alright for myself.

don't make blanket statements on website that is used by millions of people about the people on it. we're not all exceptions and special snowflakes there is just enough of us that we are diverse.

My girlfriend and I have been together for about 3 years now and I'm very happy with our relationship but lately, about 3 months now, she's been acting very distant. She doesn't really want to talk to me nor makes an effort too. These last few weeks, she doesn't even tell me she loves me anymore unless I tell her I love her first. I love this girl with all my heart and have been with her for so long but I'm not sure if she's starting to lose interest in me or what but I want to help bring back our passion or make her need me more. I miss how she used to love me and be affectionate but recently it's just been slowly disappearing and it's slipping through my fingers. I really want to make this work and fix everything and I believe it's still a fixable thing.

My girlfriend of 3 years has begun to ignore and doesn't make me feel good anymore. She doesn't tell me she loves me anymore and doesn't make an effort to try and been with me. I desperately want to make this work.

This dude was bad. He was in training and I'd be trying to show him what to do and he'd wonder off to the other room to talk to the client. His first day of training I was showing him the steps on carpet cleaning and then cleaned a little bit of the room and I was ready to let him do it but, he was gone. I found him sitting at a table talking to the customer. I said "Hey, are you ready to take over?" He said "No, I'm talking to her." So I had to do the awkward "You're supposed to be training." in front of the customer. I would usually go to the store in the mornings and that day he wanted Sonic. Well, we were past Sonic and already running behind so I said we can pull into the Mcdonalds up the road. He said "I don't have money for Mcdonalds" He tried telling me to know my place. That was hilarious coming from a trainee. I took him back to the shop and told my boss cI'm not training him. He told my boss that I'm not strong enough for this job because I'm a skinny dude. I've been doing that job for a year and some months at that point running my own truck. He went through every other guy at that point disappearing to talk to customers instead of learning how to do the job. Disappearing when it got slow only to find out he's on the other side of town when work came in. He tried accusing us of racism even though we had other black coworkers who were just fine.

The crazy trainee. Disappearing acts and false accusations. Edit; I remember one day we were at lunch and he saw some girls looking at him and he said "Girls love a man in uniform." I was like "I don't think ServiceMaster counts"

Over the Christmas break I went to Europe with my best friend 21F for 6 weeks. It was the most amazing experience I could have imagined and it made me realise just how little of the world I've seen. I've been home for about 8 weeks and still haven't managed to settle back into a routine, it has gotten better than it was but it's still really hard. I live with my partner and have for over a year. Before I left for the trip I had no doubt that I'd be with him for a long time but since being back I'm just not sure what I want anymore. I had the post-holiday "depression" that lasted for probably two weeks where I just couldn't adjust being back and I felt miserable (I was told this was normal and would subside). It has over time but I still have this thought in the back of my mind questioning what I want with my life. I'm in my last year of Uni and would love to go on a working holiday for at least a year. My partner is obviously somewhat older, he's already traveled (went with his ex partner in his early 20s) which is why I went with my friend, because he wasn't really interested. Since being back he has said that he wants to travel with me and is excited about the future etc but obviously works full-time and I don't think he would uproot his life for a year or two to travel. He has big career plans he'd like to work on. Now when I think about the future I'm petrified, I feel so young and don't want to just settle down. It's not that I want to be single and have hook-ups but I just don't know if I can have the commitment anymore of being "tied-down" (if that makes sense). I have spoken to him about this sort of, mainly in the beginning of my return but I haven't been completely truthful about how scared I am if I want this relationship to work or end it. I suppose my question is does this get any easier? Is there anyway I can figure what the hell to do? I don't want to act on anything just yet because it might just be a phase and I could snap out of it? I'm sorry if this is all over the place but I'm still trying to understand just what it is I'm feeling.

Went on a 6 week holiday over the summer break, haven't been able to readjust very well into my normal relationship routine and not sure what i want re my relationship anymore.

If it's that much of a deal breaker then you should make that clear, you can put those things on your dating profile right? > No porkers If it's your issue, which let's face it- it completely is. Then you're the one who has to take steps toward avoiding it before making the commitment to an evening. I'm going to go ahead and assume that because of her weight you lost all interest in her and she almost definetly picked up on that straight away. Which would explain why she had "no personality" she probably felt like total shit.

I feel like OP is the dick here. Edit: I had another thought, maybe she was acting completely unenthusiasticly because she was dissapointed and felt decieved by what she recieved too.

I've been with her since we were 20 and 17. The first four years of our relationship were very good, very special. The past months though have been...well, different. Not good, let's say. Her mom was throwing a pool party, which everyone in her (large extended) family was coming to. We were discussing it together in the kitchen. I told her I was excited to go, but that I didn't want to go into the pool with that many people there. It sounds dumb, but I'm self conscious of how I look -being really thin. If it was just her immediate family, I'd feel more OK with it. But with aunts and uncles and cousins and their SO's and grandparents and family friends...I didn't feel comfortable. So I'd just go for the 'party' part of it. She started to chew me out for it, saying that I was "holding myself back". Which, strictly speaking is true. But A) I'm working out and actively changing it and B) You're supposed to build me up, not tear me down. There was a point in our relationship where she put on ~40lbs. During this time she struggled a lot, there were days she didn't want to leave the house. I helped her through it and she lost the weight again over the course of about a year and a half. She knows I'm self conscious for being thin. Anyway. She chewed me out for it and uninvited me to the pool party. I feel like an idiot. And it's worse too because her family has become my family. When I say to people "I love my family" I'm talking about her sisters, mom and dad. I don't have family, either, which makes them even more important to me. Your thoughts?

Told girlfriend I'm self conscious about being thin, and, accordingly, don't want to get into the pool with so many people at her mom's pool party. She chewed me out for it and uninvited me. Thoughts?

Question 1... how do I get all of us in the same bed? Just kidding... here's the real situation. Recent breakup with 30F, amazing girl, amazing relationship, extremely bad luck and lost the relationship due to lack of communication and subsequent fallout. I'm still in love with her, love her kids like they are my own, and would put the past behind us and work through our issues if she feels the same way. Currently she says she doesn't... but I know her well and I feel like there are hints that she is still interested, specifically wanting to turn back on the love light switch if she had control of it. She's currently on anti-depressants so I understand chemically what is holding her back (best explained here at 16 mins She has made it clear, there are no other men in her life and that currently she's working on her school and taking care of the kids. Next we have 25F that I've known for 10 years, we've dated 3 times. Every time it was great fun, but eventually we got burned out from the "hunnymoon" phase and would end things mutually, last time was in my senior year of college before moving across the country. For some reason we keep finding each after we end relationships. She now wants to fly across the country to visit and stay for a while (I have a guest room so it's not a big deal, but I have a feeling she's not interested in staying there.) She's a beautiful fun girl, and I think we've grown a lot maturity wise in the past years. Finally 25F, new relationship, meet online, she's a cutie and super intelligent and articulate. She's finishing up her PHD in May and I can tell she's into me as well. I dont know much about her, but there is a spark, and that nervous new relationship feeling. My question is... Should I wait for girl 1? The one I was ready and wanted to marry? Give girl 2 another shot? Or try something new and go with 3? I really want to save relationship #1 with the 30F with kids, I know I'd be truly happy with her if we reconnected and could find our spark again. I love her kids like they are my own, and enjoyed all the amazing times we shared before our unexpected fallout that started 9 months ago. Our life really was perfect before that point, and I feel like we could move forward and grow as a couple if given a chance. I just need some outside opinion, I cant see the forest through the trees?

3 girls, not sure if I should wait and reconnect with ex I still love, ex I loved, or try things with a new girl?

Hello everyone! I'll try to keep this as succinct as I possibly can, but apologise if it gets a little diverted or confusing. I'm currently doing an MA, and met a girl on the course (let's call her Mary). Mary and I, with the rest of our course, went on a trip to France, and shared a room in a hostel (me and 3 other girls). Me an Mary shared a bed next to each other. Now, I THINK she was flirting with me; she kept saying stuff about how we should share our beds for warmth, and whenever I would say "well, we can go back to bed soon", when we had been out for the day, her response would be "Wait, mine or yours?". We talked A LOT on the trip. So, when I get back, I instinctively want to ask her out for dinner. However, I'm a bit of a coward so have been working up the courage. We talked a lot over facebook and texts; she said she told me stuff that she hadn't told anyone before, and only today said that I was her favorite person to get texts from. Here are 2 key things that have made me question if she is interested in anything more than friendship: In her texts she mentions that she was annoyed that a guy that she gave her number to didn't take her to dinner, and she would have liked that. I have been told (by the female race) that this was her hinting at me to take her out; this kind of goes hand in hand with her jokes that she plans on growing up single for the rest of her life, and being a cat women... She mentioned that she gave her number to a guy at a club, and I only found out today (this was the day I was going to ask her for dinner) that she has a date with him tomorrow. Now, I kind of bottled it, I admit it. When I heard she had a date, that was me instantly thinking that she wasn't interested. However, the "better" part of me has now decided to ask her when I next see her (on Friday) - to me, this means that if the date goes well, she'll be able to have that as a reason (per say, among other things), and if it didn't...well, she's single. But, did I fuck up? Should I have asked today? It's driving me insane, and I just need some advice. Is she actually interested?

Met girl on my MA course; I THINK she was flirting with me when we shared a room on a uni trip; said she is going on a date with a guy; don't know what to do.

I've never had a serious, genuine girlfriend. I've dated girls for a max of 4 months, and it just never ends up working out. The last girl I dated, I thought it was going to be different, things were going GREAT. This girl was literally obsessed with me, telling me she was falling for me hard, introducing me to all her friends, telling her family about me, and just would constantly tell me what an amazing guy I am. We had sex after 3 weeks of actually talking, and I think that messed with her head and it caused a huge issue. She claimed she wanted to stay single, but she gets awkward when she sees me in our group of friends. We're not on talking terms anymore, which sucks. She claimed she wanted to stay friends when she 'dumped' me, but she started ignoring me all together and treating me like shit in front of people on a consistent daily basis. I tried talking to her about it in private at a BBQ, because I genuinely wanted to stay friends with her and not have it be awkward between us, but she blew up on me and cursed me out in public in front of strangers before I could even get into details; she called me 20 minutes later after I left and cursed me out even more because she claimed I 'caused a scene'. Thats the last time we talked. It's been two months, I've been having trouble finding new girls to actually pursue. I'm not the type to just fool around and hook up with women; I genuinely want a girlfriend, or at the very least, a girl I can get intimate with and go out with. I feel like I'm in a slump and that I should try online dating.... Again. I've tried pof and okcupid before, but never had any luck. Literally, I would maybe get a couple of replies, but that would be it. Not to sound arrogant or full of myself, but I don't think I'm a bad looking guy, and I don't send lengthy or creepy initial messages. I just don't know if it's time to give it another shot or what. I want someone I can have fun with for the summer, or whatever is left of it at least... Thanks for any advice!

Got dumped 2 months ago. Not having any luck finding new girls at parties/other social events. Considering trying online dating again even though I've tried it before a while ago with no luck. Opinions?

On some level, I am sure that she knows she has a problem. The evidence is all around her, but she is blocking it out. The issue's that she probably considers her disorder mandatory, and recognizing it as a problem would mean the risk of losing her primary coping mechanism, her security blanket and pretty much the entirety of her current identity. People with eating disorders don't like themselves, and eating disorders address that problem by totally consuming the sufferer's body, mind and personality. It sounds like she's been sick for a long time. And the longer a person lives like that, the harder it is for them to accept or imagine an alternative, and the more likely they are to believe that this is okay for them because they "aren't dead yet." The really fucking sad part is that there's not a whole lot you can do. Even if you were able to force her into treatment and weight gain, without the mental commitment she will undoubtedly relapse. It's like any addiction. A tremendous amount of motivation is required to bring about change, because it will always be easier to fall back to the cycle. I honestly think what you're doing right now is the most you can do. Don't pretend there is no problem. She needs to know you are terrified for her, but she also needs your support and compassion. If you are too forceful, she's going to dig in her heels and push you away, and that'll only further enforce the idea that her disorder is the only thing she can trust. You can only serve as a reminder that she is heartbreakingly sick, yes, but she is loved and not alone and there is hope to live differently. But, and as much as I hate hate hate to say this, if you want to continue this relationship, you're going to have to accept the high chance that she will never come around and will die prematurely as a result. It's not a balanced relationship. It'll drain you. And if you can't healthily and sanely handle that, it doesn't make you a bad person for wanting to sever ties. When I had an eating disorder, I lost a shitload of friends because it was too painful for them. I don't blame them in the least because as soon as I was ready to get my shit together, they were ready to support me all the way. And that's how it has to work sometimes.

Not much you can do. Recovery takes acceptance and commitment. Keep being there for her if you can. If you can't, it's understandable. When you're friends with an anorexic, you've gotta give far more than you get.

I'm sure mines not the worst, but it's also not the best. Freshman year I got stuck with a kid who was literally the polar opposite of me. I'm messy, lazy, and a it of a stoner, and he's conservative, talks loudly on the phone till midnight about (shudder) Facebook, and was a, when I start drinking I don't stop drinking till I'm unconscious, way of viewing the world. Anyway on one occasion I was in bed with this girl (great girl, it's possible that this ended our relationship) and my roommate wipe his dick out, in his sleep, and begins to pee all over himself, his bed, and of course the single room shithole we lived on. The next day he cleared all up for me, "Oh no don't worry about it man, it's a family problem". ಠ_ಠ ಠ_ಠ This happened numerous other times, including his birthday where he literally drank and ate nothing but vodka and Red Bull all day, I'll tell you he did not have wings. But late that night, kid was passed out in bed, I left him alone and went to toke some bowls with my friends. I come back and he is STANDING IN OUR ROOM, PISSING ALL OVER THE PLACE. He can't respond to me past grunts, and is clearly not all there. He passes out in his pee and I literally wanted to piss all over him, how would he know? But I resisted temptation and let him sleep it off, I slept on a couch in a study room. Ooh and another time he came back and his face was all bloody, he told me he got in a fight, then he told me he got roofied, then he bled all over my apartment and I had to take care of him all night. The bet part was when this black kid came to our place the next day and asked if he remembered jumping around in a random room yelling we love black people with some dumb bitch.

my room ate was a piece of shit who pissed himself on multiple occasions because he got so drunk his body didn't tell him to wake up.

I have the best boyfriend I could imagine, always there for me and we share a lot of interests and perspectives on important things. We have been dating for more than one and a half year but I still can´t accept how much weed he smokes. It´s about 2-3 times per day. I am from another country than him where weed isn´t as acceptable as in for example US, and before I met him I hadn´t really been very exposed to any drugs. Although he´s working and manages his life I can´t help but getting angry almost every time I see him smoke. When I ask him if we can make a compromise and he only would smoke 3-4 times per week, he says I don´t respect that he is a free individual, that I´m controlling etc. It sounds silly, but I´m really considering whether it would be better to break up with him and let him do what he has the right to do as an adult, even though I really like him. It´s just a thing I probably never will feel cool with but it is such a big part of him. Can it be a reason enough to break up with someone? It seems unlikely since we have a serious relationship and really love each other but I can´t stand being angry about it all the time...

I think my boyfriend smokes too much weed and he refuses to cut down on it. I can just never accept it and I wonder if it would be better to leave him to be who he is than hoping for a change.

Ask them to give everyone a supply budget and reduce salaries by 80-85% of that amount. For every dollar that goes to your payroll, 40% goes to payroll and income taxes (assuming you're in the US and the 25% bracket). You net more money, they net more money, the government gets less taxes. Numbers will work out differently for other countries, but in many places your salary actually costs them 6-7% MORE than you gross, due to their contribution to payroll taxes.

The school is paying a 50% penalty on all supplies because it's passing through layers of income taxes. They should stop doing this and split the difference with you.

So we used to have a cat named Sara. She really liked to be by herself. She was nice but she really never looked for attention. In the 13 or so years we had her, she never once meowed to go outside or come inside. She just waited and came in or went out with whoever was using the door. So one night I get woken up by meowing. I looked over and Sara is next to my bed meowing at me. I ignored her at first but she persisted so I got up. She immediately started walking away making sure I was following her. She made her way to the door and meowed to go out. I was really confused. She had NEVER done this in all the years we had her. It was so unlike her. I went into my moms room (i was about 14) to ask my her if something was wrong with Sara. I explained what happened and we left her room to find Sara still waiting at the door. After thinking about it we let her out. She spent the night outside often, so it wasn't a big deal. We woke up the next morning and she was in pieces all over the yard :( Clumps of fur here and there... Bleh... What happened :(

My quiet loner cat who never asked to go outside woke me up to let her out in the middle of the night and then we found her in pieces the next morning.

Original post: Hey reddit, So for an update, I really thought my date night would turn out to be well as I was looking forward to it. Well.......... I got stood up. I waited for 1 hour, and I called and texted him, but no reply. I got fed up, and left. He called me afterwards and said he would like to do it next week. I said sure! Then hung up, and blocked his number. Later at night, my ex called me over 100 times, with texts were he begs, and apologizes. He was crying his eyes out. He said he can't live without me and so on. I already had him blocked everywhere, but as my old posts says, he just knows how to reach me. I told him to stop crying, that we can still talk, but I wont be raising my hopes in him this time. So, we're talking now and he's being in his best behavior ever. We'll see how it goes....

Date stood me up, so I blocked him.. Ex calls me later on and begs for me. We're talking now, I'm just not giving him a 100%.

A couple yrs ago I was returning from a business trip via plane. I got up to use the bathroom, and as I finished and exited, I saw a woman just outside of the bathroom door vomiting into one of those airplane baggies. Being a huge emetophobe, my heart raced, and I held my breath hoping to avoid inhaling any of her germs. I thought I was in the clear. I flew in early in the day. That evening I was eating dinner when suddenly I felt slightly nauseous and uncomfortable. It seemed harmless so I dismissed it and kept eating. A few moments later the ruckus in my gut became more apparent and I got up to use the bathroom. Sure enough, I had mild diarrhea. Okay, not bad, I thought. Guess its out now, show's over. I stopped eating for the night regardless. Then about a half hour later, the nausea returned. Now, I hadn't puked in 20 years (not since I was 6) so i really had no idea how to tell if this was going to lead to vomiting or stay as an upset stomach. I went to lay down in my bed, and curled up into the fetal position wishing for these feelings to go away. Maybe if I just fell asleep, i could sleep through this and be fine in the morning? The emetophobe in me scrunched myself together tightly and hunkered down in bed. This may have worked, except that the next bout of diarrhea was imminent. I knew I had to get myself to the bathroom across the hall - no choice. it was pathetic, but I slipped off the bed and onto the floor holding onto my fetal position as best as i could, since I noticed when I tried to straighten out, the nausea worsened. I was really anxious now. I got to the toilet, which was right next to the tub, and sat on the floor for a while. Still rolled up into a ball, I tried to figure out how to get myself onto the toilet without losing form. It wasn't long, though, before I realized I couldn’t suppress my stomach contents for much longer. This was it, I thought, I was actually going to vomit. I was terrified. I straightened up a bit and leaned over the tub, and within seconds the puke that I had so diligently and vigorously held down, and was now bottled up like a carbonated beverage, came shooting out. This wasn’t the worst part however. I was so focused on the vomiting that I had forgotten about the other end, which I had also been holding squeezed inside. When the hurls began I lost any control I had over my sphincters, and the backed-up diarrhea came gushing out the other side. I was now vomiting and shitting in bursts, at the same time. One went into the tub, the other into my underwear, pants, and onto the bathroom floor. It was disgusting, hilarious, and a great story to tell at dinner parties (joking).

Got sick from a flight, emetophobia made me scrunch in a fetal position for a couple hours, causing all the contents in me to bottle up, I eventually lost all control and ended up simultaneously shitting diarrhea and violently vomiting all over the floor.