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post | fsxvx0 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,739,892 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsxvx0/a_large_meteor/ | self.jokes | null | [deleted] | A large meteor | 4 |
post | fsxvt9 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,739,878 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsxvt9/three_engineers_are_riding_in_a_car/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | Three engineers are riding in a car. | 244 |
post | fsxvdq | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,739,817 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsxvdq/an_ophthalmologist/ | self.jokes | null | **SIR:** May I come in doc?
**DOC:** Yes sir you may come in.
**SIR:** Can I get information about eye donation campaign that you are running.
**DOC:** That is really great of you, do you know the estimated number of **people** visually impaired in the world is 285 million.
**SIR:** Oh that is sad, I want to donate my eyes.
**DOC:** Fill this form sir, will you?
**SIR:** I will fill the form and I will come tomorrow to donate my eyes.
**DOC:** Sir that will do and have a good day.
**SIR:** Good day to you too, I will see you tomorrow doc. | An ophthalmologist | 0 |
post | fsxtbo | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,739,542 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsxtbo/how_does_a_police_officer_make_an_arrest_while/ | self.jokes | null | [deleted] | How does a police officer make an arrest while practicing social distancing? | 1 |
post | fsxr9j | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,739,268 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsxr9j/a_blue_whale_anus_can_stretch_upto_a_metre/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | A blue whale anus can stretch upto a metre | 18 |
post | fsxqg2 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,739,163 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsxqg2/a_nun_is_standing_outside_a_pub/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | A nun is standing outside a pub... | 2 |
post | fsxnjh | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,738,789 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsxnjh/while_two_families_were_waiting_in_line_to_see/ | self.jokes | null | their two five-year-old boys were getting acquainted.
"My name is Joshua. What’s yours?" asked the first boy.
"Adam," replied the second.
"My daddy is a doctor. What does your daddy do for a living?" asked Joshua.
Adam proudly replied, "My daddy is a lawyer."
"Honest?" asked Joshua.
"No, just the regular kind," replied Adam. | While two families were waiting in line to see the Washington Monument, | 11 |
post | fsxmld | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,738,659 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsxmld/april_fools_day_exists_youtubers/ | self.jokes | null | This is my last video | April Fools Day exists, YouTubers: | 2 |
post | fsxkro | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,738,403 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsxkro/i_loved_making_jokes_about_plastic_blocks/ | self.jokes | null | I guess it was time to lego | I loved making jokes about plastic blocks | 3 |
post | fsxkba | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,738,340 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsxkba/a_man_on_his_way_to_work_decides_to_take_a/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | A man, on his way to work decides to take a shortcut which brings him by the mental hospital. | 2 |
post | fsxj67 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,738,184 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsxj67/racism_is_like_nickelback/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | Racism is like Nickelback... | 7 |
post | fsxhjy | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,737,963 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsxhjy/knock_knock/ | self.jokes | null | Who's there?
"WHO."
The band?
"Nope."
Shit! | Knock, knock.... | 3 |
post | fsxfiy | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,737,679 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsxfiy/when_my_girlfriend_said_she_was_leaving_because/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | When my girlfriend said she was leaving because of my obsession with The Monkees, I thought she was joking. | 8 |
post | fsxf2p | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,737,619 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsxf2p/so_a_couple_tell_their_therapist_that_the/ | self.jokes | null | Turns out they're in a covid-dependent relationship. | So a couple tell their therapist that the pandemic is actually helping their marriage... | 2 |
post | fsxbto | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,737,166 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsxbto/a_man_walks_into_a_bar/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | A man walks into a bar... | 842 |
post | fsxb16 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,737,069 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsxb16/i_think_my_wife_is_selling_cattle_a_man_has/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | I think my wife is selling cattle... A man has texted her on the phone asking if that cow is still there! | 1 |
post | fsx8v5 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,736,782 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsx8v5/3_young_men_were_lost_in_the_desert_without_any/ | self.jokes | null | After almost a full day of trying to find their way out, they stumbled across a small house. The 3 young men decided to see if there was any way they could get any help, including some drinks and a meal. After knocking on the door, the ugliest, most wrinkly, stinkiest women answered the door.
Man #1: “So sorry to interrupt you this evening, but my two friends and I are stranded in this desert. Could we possibly use your phone and have a snack and some water"
Lady: “Of course. I would be happy to help you handsome young me out! I actually just brewed some tea and made meatloaf. But first, one of you guys has to fuck me.”
The 3 young men looked at each other, almost vomiting at the idea of sticking their dick inside this vile woman.
Man #1: “I’m sorry ma’am, but I have a girl friend.”
He walks away, tapping his friends shoulder.
Man #2: “Yeah. I’m gay so I won’t be able to get hard.”
He walks away, joining his other friend.
Man #3: “I will do it. But you have to wear a blindfold.”
Lady: “That’s just fine sweetie. Come on in.”
Man #3 walks inside with the Lady while his other two friends stick outside. The ugly lady undresses, puts a blindfold on, and hands him a condom. He takes a corn on the cob from the pantry and inserts it into the lady, using it as a dildo. The lady screams and moans while the man is trying not to gag from the smell. After she orgasms, he throws the corn on the cob out of the window and stuffs the unused condom in his pocket.
Lady: “Wow that was absolutely amazing. Here is some meatloaf and a thermos of iced tea. My phone is on the countertop right over there”
After making some phone calls to his family and checking the gps to figure out how to get home, he walks outside with the meatloaf and some cold tea and walks around the corner of the house to find his friends.
Man #3: “Hey guys, look how good this meatloaf looks!”
Man #2: “Man, I don’t know about you. But we just shared the best buttered corn in our lives!” | 3 young men were lost in the desert without any food and water. | 31 |
post | fsx81e | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,736,681 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsx81e/i_think_my_wife_is_selling_cattle_a_man_has/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | I think my wife is selling cattle... A man has texted her on the phone asking if that cow is still there! | 1 |
post | fsx7s8 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,736,651 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsx7s8/nsfw_totally_legit_but_you_can_use_a_joke_if_you/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | [nsfw] Totally legit, but you can use a joke if you want to. | 2,303 |
post | fsx5xt | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,736,399 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsx5xt/hey_folks_its_april_2_today/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | Hey folks, it's April 2 today. | 1 |
post | fsx5h7 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,736,337 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsx5h7/a_religious_woman_get_married_at_17/ | self.jokes | null | She's married to her husband for 17 years, has 13 children with him.
He passes away, she marries again. This time, she and her husband are married for 23 years, and have 11 kids before he passes to the other side.
One year later she gets called to Heaven.
At her funeral, the Priest says, "Let us thank our Father in Heaven that they're finally together."
After the service, one of her children walks up to the Priest and asks, "When you said, 'Thank God they're together,' did you mean her and her first husband or her and her second husband?"
The Priest says, "...I meant her legs." | A Religious Woman Get Married at 17 | 66 |
post | fsx4r2 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,736,234 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsx4r2/what_kind_of_sweaters_do_tortoises_wear/ | self.jokes | null | Turtle-necks | What kind of sweaters do tortoises wear? | 5 |
post | fsx3l4 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,736,065 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsx3l4/expidition_of_two_scientists/ | self.jokes | null | Two scientists start an expedition to explore a deserted island.
On the second day of their expidition, they ran into a group of indigenous, the natives bound the two scientists and bring them to their village. The chief of the tribal approaches and says „**DEATH or BUMM BUMM?**“. The two scientists look completly baffled into each other and decide, that nothing is worse than death, so they pick the „Bumm Bumm“. The chief get every man of the tribal together and they start to f\*ck the two scientists in ass. After a long session of pain, embarrassment and disgust, the natives release the scientists. On the third day the scientists come again across the group. They bound them again, the chief ask the same question again and the scientists decide again to take „Bumm Bumm“, rather than death. On the fourth day the process repeats and the scientists can barely walk cause auf the pain. On the fifth day, when the event seems to start again and the chief asks them the question, they look at each other, with tears in the eyes and answer „**death**“.
The chief of the tribal walk away with a few man, to discuss their decision. When they finished their consultation the chief approaches and screams „**BUMM BUMM TILL DEATH**“ | Expidition of two scientists | 6 |
post | fsx2xy | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,735,978 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsx2xy/buying_condoms/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | Buying Condoms.... | 21 |
post | fsx225 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,735,862 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsx225/shes_16/ | self.jokes | null | [deleted] | She's 16 | 0 |
post | fsx13r | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,735,723 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsx13r/a_gorgeous_maid_met_her_madam_and_asked_for_a_pay/ | self.jokes | null | "why are you asking for a pay rise?" asked the madam.
"Because i iron better than you." answered the maid.
Silently fuming, the madam asked, "who said that?"
"your husband did."
Silent fuming intensifies. A bit daring, the madam asked again, "is that all you have to say?"
"i cook better than you, madam."
"who said that?"
"Your husband did."
A sense of defeat and humiliation overflowed within madam, but she is still unwilling to admit defeat.
"Is that all?" asked the madam hesitantly.
"i have sex better than you, madam." coolly answered the maid.
With a seething rage and trembling voice, the madam asked, "did my husband say that?"
The maid answered, "no, the gardener did."
"Oh, so how much do you want?" | A gorgeous maid met her madam and asked for a pay rise. | 694 |
post | fsx002 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,735,586 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsx002/why_did_the_queen_felt_depressed_lately/ | self.jokes | null | Because she is in a midlife-crisis | Why did the queen felt depressed lately? | 8 |
post | fswz4l | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,735,467 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswz4l/a_lady_and_her_butler/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | A lady and her butler | 158 |
post | fswxzr | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,735,319 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswxzr/why_did_the_people_who_moved_constantly_never_get/ | self.jokes | null | Because they were no-mads | Why did the people who moved constantly never get angry? | 10 |
post | fswwbc | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,735,113 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswwbc/two_birds_of_paradise_were_having_an_argument/ | self.jokes | null | As it got more heated one began giving the other the silent treatment. “Oh yeah?” Said the other, “well toucan play at that game.” | Two birds of paradise were having an argument together | 2 |
post | fswtmi | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,734,742 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswtmi/what_did_people_say_when_the_inventor_of_the_dry/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | What did people say when the inventor of the Dry Erase Board showed off his new invention. | 55 |
post | fswtl4 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,734,740 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswtl4/gofundme_raise_1bn_for_jeff_bezos/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | GoFundMe: Raise $1bn for Jeff Bezos | 1 |
post | fswsgm | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,734,575 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswsgm/i_touched_my_girlfriends_ass_and_she_farted/ | self.jokes | null | ​
​
It was a booty trap. | I touched my girlfriends ass and she farted. | 6 |
post | fswsbe | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,734,554 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswsbe/did_you_hear_about_the_paralyzed_gay_man/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | Did you hear about the paralyzed gay man? | 9 |
post | fswqvo | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,734,351 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswqvo/why_cant_chinese_people_play_cricket/ | self.jokes | null | [deleted] | Why can't Chinese people play cricket? | 4 |
post | fswpug | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,734,207 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswpug/im_gonna_let_this_one_stay_up/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | I'm gonna let this one stay up. | 1 |
post | fswpor | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,734,188 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswpor/dont_know_why_one_of_my_friend_got_suspended_for/ | self.jokes | null | Oh yeah, an online class was going on. | Don't know why one of my friend got suspended for going to washroom with his laptop while he was at his home | 0 |
post | fswpbu | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,734,132 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswpbu/why_wont_isis_bomb_my_local_walmart/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | Why wont ISIS bomb my local Walmart? | 27 |
post | fswoyd | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,734,084 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswoyd/the_sky_is_now_full_of_stars/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | The sky is now full of stars | 2 |
post | fswoec | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,734,012 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswoec/weve_found_a_cure_for_covid19/ | self.jokes | null | [deleted] | WE'VE FOUND A CURE FOR COVID-19 | 0 |
post | fswo17 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,733,959 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswo17/i_was_gonna_say_a_dead_joke_about_necrophilia/ | self.jokes | null | [deleted] | I was gonna say a dead joke about necrophilia | 2 |
post | fswl8s | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,733,589 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswl8s/a_guy_almost_lost_all_his_money_on_reddit/ | self.jokes | null | To read the second part please input your credit card information bellow. | A guy almost lost all his money on Reddit. | 7 |
post | fswjx1 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,733,412 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswjx1/my_mom_laughed_at_me_when_i_said_i_was_going_to/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | My mom laughed at me when I said I was going to build a car out of spaghetti. | 12 |
post | fswjvz | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,733,407 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswjvz/did_you_hear_about_the_goodlooking_troublemaker/ | self.jokes | null | He was a handless, handsome handfull. | Did you hear about the good-looking, troublemaker who got his arms chopped off? | 2 |
post | fswgcf | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,732,927 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswgcf/since_lockdown_began_ive_started_making_home/ | self.jokes | null | You could say I've became a regular Tentin Quarantino. | Since lockdown began, I've started making home movies... | 10 |
post | fswg7o | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,732,910 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswg7o/do_you_trust_karen/ | self.jokes | null | [deleted] | Do You trust Karen? | 0 |
post | fswfzk | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,732,884 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswfzk/so_i_was_sweaty_after_a_long_walk_and_this_fly/ | self.jokes | null | .. and the police arrested me for fly tipping. | So I was sweaty after a long walk and this fly was buzzing around my head. I offered it a little something to go away.. | 2 |
post | fswf6u | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,732,768 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswf6u/what_is_the_opposite_of_isolate/ | self.jokes | null | yousoearly | What is the opposite of ‘isolate’? | 6 |
post | fswery | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,732,720 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswery/i_wish_i_could_be_ugly_for_just_one_day/ | self.jokes | null | Because honestly, being ugly everyday sucks. | I wish I could be ugly for just one day | 37 |
post | fsweof | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,732,707 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsweof/i_love_me_job_exclaimed_thar_farmer_all_ye_do_be/ | self.jokes | null | [deleted] | “I love me job!” exclaimed thar farmer. “All ye do be boss me around all day!” complained one of his sheep. “What did ye say?” challenged thar farmer. The sheep glared back and growled... | 5 |
post | fswbf3 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,732,280 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswbf3/i_have_a_girl_friend_her_first_name_is_april/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | I have a girl friend. Her first name is April | 1 |
post | fswb20 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,732,233 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswb20/the_sky_from_my_rooftop_is_now_full_of_stars_due/ | self.jokes | null | [deleted] | The sky from my rooftop is now full of stars due to COVID-19 | 1 |
post | fswatm | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,732,212 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswatm/chinas_presidency_should_be_for_life/ | self.jokes | null | That's what Xi said. | China's presidency should be for life | 5 |
post | fswa5p | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,732,127 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fswa5p/a_mans_wife_goes_missing/ | self.jokes | null | Husband:
My wife is missing.
She went out yesterday and has not come home...
Sergeant at Police Station:
What is her height?
Husband:
Gee, I'm not sure. A little over five-feet tall.
Sergeant:
Weight?
Husband:
Don't know. Not slim, not really fat.
Sergeant:
Colour of eyes?
Husband:
Sort of brown I think. Never really noticed.
Sergeant:
Colour of hair?
Husband:
Changes a couple times a year.
Maybe dark brown now.
I can’t remember.
Sergeant:
What was she wearing?
Husband:
Could have been pants, or maybe a skirt or shorts. I don't know exactly.
Sergeant:
What kind of car did she go in?
Husband:
She went in my Audi
Sergeant:
What kind of Audi was it?
Husband: (sobbing)
Audi A6 Avant Black Edition,
Ambient Lighting pack - A6, Front and outer rear heated seats, Valcona leather - Lunar silver + super sport seats, 3 spoke heated sports leather multifunction steering wheel with paddle shift, LED Matrix headlights with high beam assist, Pearlescent paint, Audi drive select, Audi parking system plus with front and rear sensors, Audible and visual fasten seat belt warning - front and rear, Cruise control, Driver's information system, MMI SD card Navigation, Mobile telephone preparation, PAS, Service interval indicator, 3 point seatbelts on all seats, ABS-EBD, ASR traction control, Curtain airbags, Driver and passenger airbags, Driver-front passenger side airbags, Electromechanical parking brake, Electronic stability control, Front passenger airbag deactivation, Hill hold assist, Tyre pressure monitoring system, Warning triangle and first aid kit, Anti theft alarm, Anti-theft wheel bolts, Immobiliser, Keyless Start, Remote central locking, Audi music interface, Auxiliary input socket, DAB digital radio module, MMI Radio plus with CD player and bluetooth interface, SD card slot, USB connection, 12V power in rear centre console, 4 way electric lumbar support, 4 zone climate control, Aluminium door sill trims, Black cloth headlining, Double cargo floor, Electric front seats + driver memory, Front centre armrest, Front head restraints, Front-rear floor mats, Height adjustable front seats, Isofix front passenger and rear seat preparation, Jack and tool kit, Load lashing points, Luggage compartment cover, Luggage rails, Perforated leather gearknob, Rear headrests, Split folding rear seat, Auto dimming rear view mirror, Automatic headlights + automatic windscreen wipers, Body coloured bumpers, Body coloured door mirrors and handles, Body coloured roof spoiler, Door sill trims with S line logo, Electric front-rear windows, Headlight washers, High gloss black door mirrors, High gloss black finish B pillar, High gloss black triangular aperture at rear door, LED daytime running lights, LED rear lights, Light sensor, Platinum grey front lip spoiler, Privacy glass (to rear of B post), Rain sensor, Rear wiper, Alcantara door trim, Piano black finish inlay, Space saver spare wheel, Black Styling pack - A6 Avant, Non smoking pack - A6, Diesel particulate filter
(At this point, the sobbing has turned into a full cry.)
Sergeant:
Don't worry buddy. We'll find your Audi | A man's wife goes missing... | 24 |
post | fsw7w7 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,731,831 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsw7w7/my_wife_complained_that_i_never_finish_anything/ | self.jokes | null | So I replied wi | My wife complained that I never finish anything | 15 |
post | fsw77o | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,731,734 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsw77o/why_did_the_monkey_fall_out_of_the_tree/ | self.jokes | null | because it was dead. | Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? | 4 |
post | fsw54t | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,731,451 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsw54t/why_are_the_conservatives_a_bunch_of_pussies/ | self.jokes | null | [deleted] | Why are the conservatives a bunch of pussies? | 0 |
post | fsw39h | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,731,198 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsw39h/omg_get_this/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | omg, get this... | 1 |
post | fsw2k9 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,731,104 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsw2k9/jeffrey_epstein_committed_suicide/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | Jeffrey Epstein committed suicide. | 4 |
post | fsw21f | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,731,034 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsw21f/jeffrey_epstein_killed_committed_suicide/ | self.jokes | null | [deleted] | Jeffrey Epstein killed committed suicide | 1 |
post | fsw204 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,731,030 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsw204/did_you_hear_about_the_old_man_who_drowned/ | self.jokes | null | [deleted] | Did you hear about the old man who drowned? | 2 |
post | fsw1t9 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,731,005 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsw1t9/how_do_you_get_rid_of_a_republican/ | self.jokes | null | You tell him that economy is suffering and he should sacrifice himself. | How do you get rid of a republican? | 9 |
post | fsw1ci | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,730,937 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsw1ci/a_dog_attacks_a_little_girl/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | A dog attacks a little girl | 32 |
post | fsw1c5 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,730,935 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsw1c5/teaching_in_this_girls_high_school_is_such_a/ | self.jokes | null | [deleted] | Teaching in this Girls' High School is such a relief. | 1 |
post | fsw0sk | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,730,865 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsw0sk/i_shot_my_dog_today/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | I shot my dog today | 0 |
post | fsvyza | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,730,629 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvyza/every_time_i_see_jokes_that_has_long_tag_i_just/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | Every time I see jokes that has "long" tag I just skip them. | 1 |
post | fsvy4h | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,730,520 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvy4h/breaking_news_president_trump_has_tested_positive/ | self.jokes | null | [deleted] | Breaking News: President Trump has tested positive for Covid-19 | 0 |
post | fsvxza | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,730,498 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvxza/i_dropped_my_cup_of_milk_on_the_floor/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | I dropped my cup of milk on the floor... | 0 |
post | fsvxew | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,730,417 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvxew/a_farmer_was_going_up_a_hill_with_his_horse_and/ | self.jokes | null | Suddenly the horse stops and speaks to him in perfect English: "Hey man this hill is too steep, can we go around it for once?"
The man is completely bewildered and says "Holly fu*k, I've never seen a talking horse before"
And the carriage is like "Wow, wtf, me neither". | A farmer was going up a hill with his horse and carriage | 2 |
post | fsvw6i | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,730,245 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvw6i/where_do_suicide_bombers_go_when_they_die/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | Where do suicide bombers go when they die? | 610 |
post | fsvvzn | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,730,218 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvvzn/what_the_name_lol/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | what the name, lol | 1 |
post | fsvvw6 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,730,204 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvvw6/i_was_in_the_living_room_with_my_dad/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | I was in the living room with my dad | 106 |
post | fsvut6 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,730,057 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvut6/i_put_the_shrimp_in_shrimp_cocktail/ | self.jokes | null | Wait a second......... | I put the shrimp in shrimp cocktail | 2 |
post | fsvubi | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,729,990 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvubi/i_cant_believe_how_many_people_are_ignoring_the/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | I can't believe how many people are ignoring the stay home order. | 0 |
post | fsvs5q | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,729,712 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvs5q/i_am_pierre/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | I am Pierre | 18 |
post | fsvriu | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,729,626 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvriu/what_do_you_call_an_orgy_between_planets/ | self.jokes | null | The Big Bang. | What do you call an orgy between planets? | 12 |
post | fsvrds | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,729,604 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvrds/me_and_my_neighbour/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | Me and my neighbour | 1 |
post | fsvq7q | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,729,448 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvq7q/ah_here_again_comes_the_april_fools_day_some_men/ | self.jokes | null | Wait. It was the news on the TV. | Ah. Here again comes the April Fools' Day. Some men outside screaming horrendous things. They never grow up. | 1 |
post | fsvptt | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,729,397 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvptt/how_do_you_call_animated_porn_with_chicken_tails/ | self.jokes | null | a hentail | How do you call animated porn with chicken tails? | 3 |
post | fsvpbj | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,729,328 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvpbj/how_do_you_call_a_animated_porn_with_chicken_tails/ | self.jokes | null | [deleted] | How do you call a animated porn with chicken tails? | 1 |
post | fsvoop | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,729,238 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvoop/i_shoved_my_throbbing_cock_into_a_paper_shredder/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | I shoved my throbbing cock into a paper shredder | 1 |
post | fsvo2w | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,729,160 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvo2w/april_fools/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | April Fool's | 0 |
post | fsvng7 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,729,073 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvng7/on_a_scale_of_alligator_to_gorilla/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | On a scale of Alligator to Gorilla.... | 1 |
post | fsvmep | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,728,930 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvmep/whats_the_difference_between_john_lennons_wife/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | What's the difference between John Lennon's wife and his dick? | 0 |
post | fsvlw8 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,728,858 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvlw8/what_do_you_call_a_sheep_covered_in_chocolate/ | self.jokes | null | A candy baa. | What do you call a sheep covered in chocolate? – | 4 |
post | fsvldu | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,728,795 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvldu/are_you_bored/ | self.jokes | null | Punch an orphan. What are they gonna do?
Tell their parents? | Are you bored? | 0 |
post | fsvkwo | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,728,734 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvkwo/why_do_the_swedish_military_have_barcodes_on_the/ | self.jokes | null | So when they all return to port, they can Scandinavian. | Why do the Swedish military have barcodes on the sides of their ships? | 21 |
post | fsvktm | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,728,722 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvktm/kim_jongun_has_announced_north_korea_will_be_the/ | self.jokes | null | And so Donald Trump promptly gives him a call telling him how stupid his plan is. They can't go to the sun; it's too hot!
And so Kim replies, "We'll go at night!"
And then Trump replies, "You fool! There is no sun at night!" | Kim Jong-Un has announced North Korea will be the first country to send people to the sun | 4 |
post | fsvk48 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,728,623 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvk48/husband_wife_reach_home_after_a_motorcycle_ride/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | Husband Wife Reach home after a motorcycle ride | 3 |
post | fsvk35 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,728,621 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvk35/a_salmon_walks_into_a_bakers/ | self.jokes | null | And the owner glares at him from behind the counter and says:
"You'll have to leave. We don't sell fishcakes here." | A salmon walks(?) into a bakers | 2 |
post | fsvjqv | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,728,576 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvjqv/where_do_cows_get_their_medicine/ | self.jokes | null | At the farmacy. | Where do cows get their medicine ? | 3 |
post | fsvj0s | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,728,487 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvj0s/a_man_storms_into_a_bakery_and_says_i_want_to/ | self.jokes | null | The baker rolls his eyes and says "well, you did ask for a blue brie muffin." | A man storms into a bakery and says "I want to make a complaint! This muffin is mouldy and tastes like cheese!" | 5 |
post | fsvir1 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,728,451 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvir1/yo_girl_are_you_a_zero_apr_loan/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | Yo girl, are you a zero APR loan? | 8 |
post | fsvibh | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,728,401 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvibh/what_do_you_get_from_a_dwarf_cow/ | self.jokes | null | Condensed milk | What do you get from a dwarf cow? | 6 |
post | fsvi18 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,728,369 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvi18/buck_bang/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | BUck BAng | 1 |
post | fsvhec | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,728,292 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvhec/how_do_we_know_that_hot_is_faster_than_cold/ | self.jokes | null | You can catch a cold. | How do we know that hot is faster than cold? | 1 |
post | fsvh1t | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,728,247 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvh1t/which_country_gives_you_the_best_bang_for_your/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | Which country gives you the best bang for your buck? | 1 |
post | fsvgpq | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,728,205 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvgpq/so_there_was_this_guy_named_the_tree/ | self.jokes | null | He was dark, tall, and dyed his hair green at one point, hence the name. He was an army buddy. I woke up and looked over to him. There was something protruding from his blanket. I asked him about it. He responds. "It's just mornin wood." | So there was this guy named "The Tree" | 0 |
post | fsvg6t | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,728,137 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvg6t/its_not_delivery_its_digorno/ | self.jokes | null | A woman was pregnant and in labor with her only son, named Digorno. Her husband was waiting outside for her. Suddenly the doctor rushed in with good news.
"We have good news!"
"Is it delivery?"
"It's not delivery, it's Digorno."
And then they celebrated with pizza afterwards. | It's not delivery it's Digorno | 0 |
post | fsvg21 | 2qh72 | jokes | false | 1,585,728,121 | https://old.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/fsvg21/which_country_gives_you_the_best_bang_for_your/ | self.jokes | null | [removed] | Which country gives you the best bang for your buck? | 1 |