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[ { "author": "user-id/48995", "content": "<p><span>What if I am making myself belive I am autistic, so I think I am and made my sister think I am. I'm afraid of being diagnosed with autism or just any mental illness/disability. But I am also afraid of there never being an answer to what I've been experiencing my whole life. I keep researching about mental health because I keep thinking that what I'm going through has to mean something and that something is going to change. I know its just anxiety and depression, but I dont know why I can't accept it. Do I want to be broken? Do I want to be different? I shouldn't be wanting mental illness, but at the same time I wish that I was so it can explain my brain. I've known I've had anxiety and depression ever since I was younger (although it wasn't as bad as now) but it couldn't have been the reason for everything I went through. I've worked on anxiety and depression fog years, but nothing changed or gotten better, so I thought it might just be smth else. But it's not, and I can't seem to accept it. I just feel broken, everyday when I remember my life and who I am, I just feel broken. I'm sorry. Thinking this way is probably narcissistic and attention seeking. But I thought it was best to say the truth so I can fix it before I get too sucked into the whole mental health part of the internet. I find myself being really obsessed with mental health and I want to just accept myself. But I feel like I can't do that unless I get told I have a mental illness or disability, so that i know I'm not entirely broken. And I can get fixed. I'll work on stopping my obsession with mental health and only living in the moment. It's better to stop persuading myself I'm someone I'm not. I feel like I messed myself up by living in my head my whole life and only thinking about what's wrong with me. I spent my whole life constantly trying to figure myself out and why I feel different, that I got attached to different mental illness completly believing I had them, only to realise it doesn't seem right or it doesn't satisfy me. So I fall back into depression and anxiety. What if I just caused this upon myself? What if I wanted to be different that I made myself developed depression and anxiety over the years? What if im crazy and messed up in the head? I mean I'm writing this with no facial expression or emotions, but I truly am trying to write how I feel. But I feel like I'm always lying or acting, even tho I am trying to write how I feel. But what if im not? What if im pretending and I haven't noticed? What if im lying to myself that this is how I feel? What if I don't actually feel this way and I'm a evil person who believes their good? Please help. I don't want to go insane. That's one of my biggest phobias. H</span><span>ow do I stop thinking I'm a character and actually just exist? Why is everything about my mental health my whole life? Why is messed up? Is it because of me? Will I ever know? Do I just have to live with this brain? Is this normal? Will I ever feel normal or okay? </span></p></div>", "date": "24-10-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/messed-myself-up/td-p/577224" }, { "author": "user-id/16277", "content": "<p>Hi Alel,</p><p> </p><p>Thank you for your candid post. There is nothing to apologise for and you are not narcissistic for sharing your story here. Having mental health issues is nothing to be ashamed of. As many as 1 in 5 people are currently experiencing mental health issues (most commonly anxiety) and 1 in 2 people will experience mental health issues at some point in their life. Just because you cant find a diagnosis or mental illness that accurately depicts what you're going through that doesn't necessarily mean you're alone. Diagnoses are just used to categorise a group of symptoms that are commonly associated with each other. They are a way professionals can communicate with each other in terms of symptoms, treatment and medication. They are a means to an end and not the end themselves. Questioning yourself and your mental health and wellbeing is completely normal and in fact a healthy exercise. A good activity you mind find fulfilling is journalling. It is a good way to express our emotions and a way to reflect on our thoughts and emotions. You will not go \"insane\" by thinking and working on your mental health. </p><p> </p><p>A good place to start is to research some of the information available on this website about anxiety and depression and watching some of the videos. You will find that many of the people who give testimonies are people we interact everyday with and are in fact struggling with their own issues. This is a good link to visit as a starting point in terms of assessing your mental health also.  </p><p> </p><p><a href=\"https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/check-your-mental-health/check-in\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/check-your-mental-health/check-in</a> </p><p> </p><p>Hope that helps.</p><p> </p><p>Bob</p></div>", "date": "24-10-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/messed-myself-up/td-p/577224" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/36946", "content": "<p class=\"\">Back in 2020, I developed ectopic beats. These are horrible beats that thud in my chest and take my breath away. The worst of them are the flutters – ectopic beats that I have in pairs or sometimes in threes. I had both PVC's and PAV's for those familiar with the terminology. The burden was not necessarily high, but they were there, and very real. Thankfully, I was able to see a cardiologist, who did bloods, a Holter monitor, and an echocardiogram. I was discharged and, over the coming days/weeks, I got better and started living my life again.</p><p class=\"\"> </p><p class=\"\">About six weeks ago, my ectopic beats returned, likely due to stress, being sicks with two viruses, and drinking three glasses of red wine. I had a bout of those horrible flutters for about 8 hours. I was exhausted and worried. Again, thankfully, I went back to the cardiologist, who did another Holter monitor, 12-Cord ECG, and an echocardiogram. His report was very favourable – structurally, nothing had changed with my heart, which he compared to the echocardiogram in 2020. My heart is working well. During the consultation, he did question a couple of things about my Holter monitor, though dismissed these as ‘artifacts’. Aka, the machine must have glitched. This planted the seed in my mind that those artifacts were actually genuine signs that my heart arteries may have been blocked. I should have asked him there and then, but I didn’t. Perhaps this was foolish, perhaps not. I should note that, at this time, I had no chest pain nor discomfort. The ectopic beats had stopped and I was feeling good.</p><p class=\"\"> </p><p class=\"\">However, my worry continued. I started getting chest pain, discomfort, fullness, burning sensations all over my skin. Something felt terribly wrong, and my mind turned to clogged arteries. In my mind, it was the only explanation to why I was still having symptoms. I started getting dizzy, I started feeling sick, and I worried that at any moment I was going to drop dead. My sensations were/are very real, and sometimes very painful.</p><p class=\"\"><br>(Continued below)</p></div>", "date": "12-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-anxiety-struggling/td-p/574304" }, { "author": "user-id/36946", "content": "<p class=\"\">Naturally, I started getting paranoid. I researched on Reddit incessantly, trying to seek reassurance that the tests I had done would rule of CAD (coronary artery disease) or blocked arteries. Of course, responses were mixed. Some said yes, definitely. Others said no, seek further testing – or else! I resented my doctor and the cardiologist because they had failed in their duty to rule out everything. Though, I also noted that a CT-scan or angiogram are very invasive and are associated with risks.</p><p class=\"\"> </p><p class=\"\">My mind spiralled – more symptoms meant I was encroaching upon the end. I started getting severe panic-attacks. My palpitations hurt. I was going to die. I resisted every urge to seek medical help again, until I relapsed and went to the ER room.</p><p class=\"\"> </p><p class=\"\">I waited for hours.</p><p class=\"\"> </p><p class=\"\">I had a chest x-ray, a blood test to detect Troponin (chemicals for a damaged heart), and another 12-Cord ECG. I again glimpsed a strange ‘blip’ on the ECG and the nurse on duty had to consult with a specialist, which made me more anxious. However, all the tests came back normal. The doctor wrote on my report that was ECG was completely normal. Even though I had suffered for weeks with chest pain and discomfort, my Troponin levels were not elevated in the slightest.</p><p class=\"\"> </p><p class=\"\">So, now, I'm really struggling. I am convinced I have CAD and don't know what to do from here.</p></div>", "date": "12-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-anxiety-struggling/td-p/574304" }, { "author": "user-id/48737", "content": "<p>Hey Patrick,</p><p>So sorry to hear all of this is causing you anxiety and distress. I have health anxiety at times and I know how hard it is to control. All I can suggest is that if the specialists have told you that your heart is ok, then although it is difficult (I had a neurosurgeon who I didn't believe even after showing me on a CT scan that my surgery outcome was fine and there was nothing to worry about) I guess you have to accept and trust their expertise. Harder said than done, I was in a tailspin thinking I had bone cancer and I wouldn't accept any opinions! Other than that I could only suggest going to another Cardiologist for further testing to confirm that things are ok?</p><p>I hope you can feel at ease again soon.</p></div>", "date": "12-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-anxiety-struggling/td-p/574304" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/2220", "content": "<p>Feeling lost.</p>\n<p>I started a new job 2 weeks ago, was doing ok, but messed up today. The manager &amp; I stayed back 1.5hrs to try &amp; fix it.</p>\n<p>I feel guilt about keeping him back, guilt for the stuff up. But also ashamed. Because of what happened. I had a “medical” incident. I doubt most here will understand, but I had a hypo (low blood sugar; I’m type 1 diabetic). As a type 1, when blood sugar gets too low you urgently need fast acting glucose to get your levels back up. Worse case scenario in extreme circumstances is seizures, or coma, or death. I’ve had an ambulance called &amp; been hospitalised twice previously due to seizures from low blood sugar.</p>\n<p>so today my blood sugar dropped too low. I became disoriented, was sweating as if I was in a sauna &amp; kind of didn’t know what was going on. But I kept trying to do my job, was too embarrassed to speak up &amp; say I needed help. And that’s why I messed up my order in the computer. But worse, no one around me even noticed I was having trouble or understood what danger I was in.</p>\n<p>im so ashamed. So ashamed my body doesn’t work like it should, ashamed what happened was beyond my control, ashamed I didn’t speak up or ask for help, ashamed I messed up.</p>\n<p>I don’t know how to face my colleagues tomorrow. I’m so embarrassed I don’t want to ever show my face again.</p>\n<p>i hate that I can’t stick up for myself, or ask for help. I hate that I sometimes struggle because of my condition. I hate being different. I hate myself.</p>\n<p>Just needed somewhere to let this all out…..</p></div>", "date": "23-10-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-messed-up-again-no-one-to-talk-to-or-confide-in/td-p/45139" }, { "author": "user-id/14386", "content": "Hi.<br>\n<br>\nI can remember one time at a place I worked at a guy accidently deleted records out of a database used to drive the content of a web site. Ouch! He had to go and tell the manager what happened. It took a couple of hours to fix - this was back in the early 2000s. The person that removed the records was quite embarrassed and felt quite guilt as well.<br>\n<br>\nWhile I was not is manager I did also chat with him as I was a mentor of sorts to him. What I told him I will tell you. (And if sounds like the issue was fixed.) Problems can easily happen and it was able to be fixed. We live the fight another day. \"M\" will be upset for a while but you did the right thing. None of us are perfect.<br>\n<br>\nAnd from my psychologist ... \"a mistake is an opportunity for learning\"<br>\n<br>\nFwiw... I get the similar feelings to you about mistakes. I have this need to be perfect or right. Things from my past get in the way ... I wonder if the same happened to you?<br>\n<br>\nCan I ask whether you explained what happened to you boss?<br>\n<br>\nDo any of your colleagues know what happened?</div>", "date": "23-10-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-messed-up-again-no-one-to-talk-to-or-confide-in/td-p/45139" }, { "author": "user-id/25170", "content": "<p>Hi TheBigBlue,</p>\n<p>Its not your fault, it’s not your fault that your body does what it does it’s out of your control.</p>\n<p>Don’t worry about what happened with the computer it can always be fixed.</p>\n<p>Please have a chat to your boss tomorrow and let your boss know what you were going through I’m sure they will understand and they will also understand for the future if anything medically happens to you, this way they will be prepared and understand.</p>\n<p>Do you know that our greatest struggles can lead us to our greatest achievements…… have faith in yourself…. </p></div>", "date": "24-10-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-messed-up-again-no-one-to-talk-to-or-confide-in/td-p/45139" }, { "author": "user-id/8236", "content": "<p>Hello TheBigBlue, it may seem to be embarrassing but it shouldn't be because now your workmates will be on the look out to see whether or not you are having some type of reaction and if this did happen with someone else, they would be doing exactly the same with them.</p>\n<p>It's good they are looking out for you and please don't be upset with yourself.</p>\n<p>Geoff.</p></div>", "date": "24-10-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-messed-up-again-no-one-to-talk-to-or-confide-in/td-p/45139" }, { "author": "user-id/2220", "content": "<p>Eeek, dragging myself into work again today.</p>\n<p>sounds stupid but one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. Normally I would refuse to face the world &amp; chuck a sickie. But we are already short a team member &amp; that would leave my colleague completely alone so I can’t do it.</p>\n<p>Thank god it’s my managers day off today &amp; tomorrow, then it’s my “weekend” so I just need to get through these 2 days &amp; then I can switch off from worrying about work for a few days.</p>\n<p>I hate how living a normal life is so challenging with anxiety. Every day feels like there is a mountain to climb to overcome something. It really wears me down.</p>\n<p>Anyway, I guess I should at least be proud of myself that I intend to actually turn up to work today…..</p></div>", "date": "24-10-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-messed-up-again-no-one-to-talk-to-or-confide-in/td-p/45139" }, { "author": "user-id/37850", "content": "Hi TheBigBlue,<br>\nDiabetes is a physical condition, I am just a little\nfamiliar with. Some people are predisposed to that as to any other physical\ncondition which might develop or not - &amp; not easily predictable who \nor when. Like epilepsy or asthma, schizophrenia, glaucoma (a condition I have),\narthritis (I also have), Parkinson's disease, &amp; many more. Are we to feel\nashamed of anyone &amp; everyone who has developed any of these conditions?<br>\nI’ve known people with the conditions I’ve mentioned.\nThey disclosed to me &amp; taught me about their experiences, &amp; let me know\nhow I might help, in times of need.<br>\nThat's why, I would strongly suggest telling your boss,\neven if you have to write a letter/email, explaining you have this condition.\nIf he/she has questions, you could answer them or provide information about\nwhere to find out more.<br>\nI’m certain your boss would appreciate your honesty,\nbetter late than never.<br>\nIf you continue dodging the issue of how you feel about\nhaving diabetes, &amp; I suppose, you think others will feel the same, then\nthose feelings will follow you wherever you go. &amp; will be there when your\nblood sugar levels drop, &amp; you happen to be where someone might notice you\nare unwell. <br>\nIt was good of you to think of your colleague &amp; get\nyourself into work. I'm sure that was not easy. I think, though, if you'd\nchucked a sickie, you would’ve beat up on yourself for that.<br>\nYes, it is difficult to face up &amp; think about these\nthings, &amp; not run away, feeling like you've dodged a bullet every time -\nthat's exhausting, it's a never-ending cycle. I think you'll have a quicker way\nthrough it if you seek some help, &amp; face &amp; deal with these feelings.\nThey are disrupting your life, causing you so much unhappiness, &amp; you don't\ndeserve to have to live like this.<br>\nYou have told us. What is our respond?<br>\n&amp; our bodies are not perfect machines. None of us has\none of those yet.<br>\nBodies will develop problems, just because, well, nature.\nAt the genetic &amp; cellular level, our\nbodies try to repair &amp; renew, but not perfectly, so eventually things break\ndown to a greater or lesser degree. We cannot stop that. So, the way your body\nis, is human.<br>\nEase up on yourself. The mistake is not going to be a\nlife sentence. You weren't sacked on the spot, right? So, give yourself a\nlittle slack, too. <br>\nmmMekitty</div>", "date": "24-10-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-messed-up-again-no-one-to-talk-to-or-confide-in/td-p/45139" }, { "author": "user-id/25170", "content": "<p>Well done The Big Blue going to work today I hope all is going well.</p>\n<p>Yes anxiety is difficult but the more you defy it the stronger you will become.</p>\n<p>Yes you should be proud of yourself <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":smiling_face_with_smiling_eyes:\">😊</span></p></div>", "date": "24-10-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-messed-up-again-no-one-to-talk-to-or-confide-in/td-p/45139" }, { "author": "user-id/43202", "content": "<p>The bigblue</p>\n<p>Thanks for writing honestly about what happened and how you felt.</p>\n<p>I know a bit about diabetes as I have a friend and family member who have type 1 diabetes.</p>\n<p>I think we also need to be educated about diabetes and this would me a great chance for your colleagues to be educated. </p>\n<p>I understand this incident would make you anxious. You have lots of support here and will get support at work once they know about diabetes. </p>\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "24-10-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-messed-up-again-no-one-to-talk-to-or-confide-in/td-p/45139" }, { "author": "user-id/30599", "content": "Hi BigBlue\n<div> </div>\n<p>I understand how you feel. I've made stuff ups at work before. And at uni as well. Actually q<span style=\"font-size: inherit;\">uite recently my uni demonstrator had to stay back on my behalf because of mistakes I had made during a prac session. So I get it.</span></p>\n<p> Making mistakes in official settings where you have expectations is hard and stressful. I've been there. I've felt exactly how you feel. It really sucks.</p>\n<p>It's ok though. It's not your fault. We all make mistakes. And everyone's body is fallible. This makes you human.</p>\n<p>It's a common denominator between you and every other person on earth (including your colleagues and manager).</p>\n<p>You don't need to be ashamed. Its normal. You're a person.</p></div>", "date": "25-10-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-messed-up-again-no-one-to-talk-to-or-confide-in/td-p/45139" }, { "author": "user-id/47740", "content": "<p>You must never be ashamed of your disability or asking for help</p><p> </p><p>We are all human and all have our difficulties</p><p> </p><p>Ill give an example</p><p> </p><p>I am epileptic and will probably never drive due to my epilepsy but I don't let it stand in my path and stop me I FOCUS ON WHAT I can do. You must not have fear of asking for help with your disability. if you had a cut finger you would put a bandage on . You can't prevent what happens to you in your situation but you have a choice to rise and not let it defeat you. You must focus on the gifts god has given you and not focus on what you don't have.</p><p> </p><p>You face fear on what do I do next how do I solve my issue always look for support and care from family and friends and remember we always walk beside and you and you are never alone.</p><p> </p><p>You must always focus on what are my strengths what am I good at and not be scared to try new things with a calculated risk. I use things like meditation or exercise to help me through my day. IT IS IMPORTANT TO Eat a healthy diet to help control diabetes.</p><p> </p><p>I totally understand because I am diabetic type 2 but I am on a stricked diet and rigourous exercise plan. It is important to make right decisions to look after your health and remember the love of your family</p><p> </p><p>You have the power to stand up to your adversity and defeat your illness</p><p> </p></div>", "date": "12-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-messed-up-again-no-one-to-talk-to-or-confide-in/td-p/45139" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48852", "content": "<p>I'm feeling very anxious and I have no idea why. <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":confused_face:\">😕</span>. </p><p> </p><p>I try a lot of things such as playing games, watching movies, going for walks, sitting outside in fresh air, playing with my dogs and colouring in books. They only last for so long and are short term which is a major problem for me. </p><p> </p><p>It's worse at night time and first thing in the morning. Sleeping becomes difficult at times for me. </p><p> </p><p>I suffer at work sometimes with it as well but I'd prefer others to not know about it. </p><p> </p><p>I don't know what else to do. </p></div>", "date": "05-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-anxiety/td-p/573814" }, { "author": "user-id/48853", "content": "<p>go message places they help you relax </p></div>", "date": "05-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-anxiety/td-p/573814" }, { "author": "user-id/48737", "content": "<p>I hope you are feeling more peaceful today <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":red_heart:\">❤️</span> Has this been a long-term problem for you? x</p></div>", "date": "05-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-anxiety/td-p/573814" }, { "author": "user-id/48852", "content": "<p>It's been an ongoing issue the last few months. </p><p> </p><p>There are days where I'm miserable and then there might be a couple of weeks where nothing happens. </p><p> </p><p>It's annoying never knowing what sort of a day/night I'll be in for. </p><p> </p><p>I've even thought about going to hospital for it. </p></div>", "date": "05-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-anxiety/td-p/573814" }, { "author": "user-id/48852", "content": "<p>What places are available? </p></div>", "date": "05-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-anxiety/td-p/573814" }, { "author": "user-id/3729", "content": "<p>Hi there<br> <br>Thank you for your post to the forums today and for sharing with us how you are feeling right now. It must be really tough not knowing what sort of day you will have. It can be exhausting to feel like we have to keep anticipating our emotions.<br> <br>If you ever feel that it is too much to bear, going to hospital/presenting to the emergency department can be a good option to stay safe. You can also speak with your GP about it, too. <br><br>If you ever feel like talking, please know that the Beyond Blue counsellors are here for you as well, and you can call us on 1300 22 4636 any time. Thanks again for posting here today - we hope your evening goes well<br> <br>Kind regards,  <br>Sophie M </p></div>", "date": "05-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-anxiety/td-p/573814" }, { "author": "user-id/13121", "content": "<p>Hello Dear 17-6-1987,</p><p> </p><p>A very warm and caring welcome to our forums…</p><p> </p><p>I am so sorry that your struggling hard with anxiety, I also struggle with anxiety…One thing I learnt is that without a good nights sleep our emotions are heightened and that includes anxiety…</p><p> </p><p>Your so right in saying that distraction isn’t really a long term thing…it helps our anxiety while we’re doing things we like, then when we stop I know my anxiety comes back…but at least for those minutes, hours that we are doing things we like…our mind does have a little rest from the bombardment of anxious thoughts…</p><p> </p><p>Night time was hard for me to sleep, I would lay for hours in bed trying to sleep with my mind chattering away with anxious thoughts….I spent a number of weeks in hospital, where I was introduced to sleep stories, they are gently spoken stories of peaceful places…just search YouTube “sleep stories “…I have a couple of favourite readers…”Dan Jones”,   “Get Sleepy” …I mostly fall asleep before the story is even finished….maybe give one a try tonight and see how you go….</p><p> </p><p>Do you have a GP. that you could talk to about how your anxiety is effecting you on a daily basis, they can help you….your GP, can get you a mental health care plan to help you manage your anxiety better by speaking to professional counsellors/psychologists…</p><p> </p><p><br>Please talk here whenever you feel up to it, we are here when we can be, to help support you the best we can…</p><p> </p><p>Kind thoughts Dear 17-6-1987,</p><p>Grandy…</p></div>", "date": "05-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-anxiety/td-p/573814" }, { "author": "user-id/48852", "content": "<p>The problem is, I have no support at home. If I go to hospital, everybody will just treat me like I'm over reacting, they keep telling me it's just all in my head. </p><p> </p><p>It's very stressful always basically having to be on guard I guess you could say all the time. It takes just one thing to set it all off again. </p><p> </p><p>I really don't think there's much else my gp can do. </p></div>", "date": "05-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-anxiety/td-p/573814" }, { "author": "user-id/48852", "content": "<p>I can't afford to take time off or end up in hospital for weeks at a time because I have a mortgage to pay now. I have to keep working. </p><p> </p><p>I have a regular gp but I try not going to doctors and wasting their time. </p><p> </p><p>Things help to distract me but like you say, once you stop, it all comes back again. It's very hard. </p><p> </p><p>I watch movies to help me fall asleep, I need some sort of noise otherwise I can't sleep. </p></div>", "date": "05-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-anxiety/td-p/573814" }, { "author": "user-id/48202", "content": "<p>Dear Guest7817,</p><p>Please don't worry about wasting your GP's time. That's what he or she is paid to do. They may be able to help with medication or a referral to a counsellor or psychologist. You seem to have made every effort to help yourself so you deserve help from others.</p><p>With regard to insomnia, if you google  'progressive muscle relaxation' you'll find some recordings that might help. </p><p>Please keep in touch. We are here to support you and to help you find more peace and relaxation in your life.</p><p>Warm regards,</p><p>Richju xxxx</p></div>", "date": "10-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-anxiety/td-p/573814" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48861", "content": "<p>Hi, </p><p> </p><p>I’ve been diagnosed with social anxiety and depression in the last couple of years but have struggled ever since I can remember. <br><br></p><p>I have never really managed to hold on to friendships and at the moment, can’t actually even name someone who is my friend. I’m really lonely and ashamed about how alone I am. I’m realising how scared I am to reach out to people because I assume they will reject me. I’ve just stopped trying. But this just continues the cycle of loneliness. I don’t know how to break out of it. <br><br></p><p>This has been an issue I’ve dealt with my entire life and I don’t see it getting better. I’m now in my mid thirties. <br><br></p><p>I’m so tired of constantly worrying about what people think about me. I’m exhausted. <br><br></p><p>I’m sorry there isn’t much positivity here - it isn’t going well. </p></div>", "date": "05-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/social-anxiety-really-makes-relationships-hard/td-p/573891" }, { "author": "user-id/48834", "content": "<p>Hi Janie223</p><p>Don't be afraid, don't be nervous. You're welcome here. You will find friends and support. </p></div>", "date": "05-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/social-anxiety-really-makes-relationships-hard/td-p/573891" }, { "author": "user-id/48861", "content": "<p>Thanks for your message. It means a lot. </p></div>", "date": "06-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/social-anxiety-really-makes-relationships-hard/td-p/573891" }, { "author": "user-id/48737", "content": "<p>Hi there,</p><p>So sorry to hear how you are struggling <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":disappointed_face:\">😞</span> I sometimes get social anxiety as part of overall anxiety disorder/depression too. I know how hard it is to feel that loneliness and not have the strength or confidence to interact with people, let alone make new friends. I have always been self-conscious and worried that people didn't like me since I was a little girl, time and maturity helps (mid-forties now), but it still gets me sometimes. Years ago however, I was at an event where I didn't know many people other than my then-boyfriend and his mum. I noticed a woman standing on her own and something made me go up to her and tell her how much I liked her jacket. It broke the ice and we ended up having a nice long chat. Now I use that trick to meet people in social settings and get outside of my comfort zone, just think of one compliment and (usually) people will happily respond and it can be a conversation-starter. But actually getting to social events can be another story entirely, i know. </p><p> </p><p>I don't know if it is for you, but I am involved in a fab local church and joined a small group (life group/small group) 5 or so years ago and although it was a little daunting walking into a room of people who know each other and I didn't really know anyone, it has turned into a wonderful source of connection and friendship.</p><p> </p><p>I don't have a wide circle of close friends these days, life happens I guess, but I really make an effort to stay in touch with them all, even if it is a random SMS, sharing a funny video on Instagram or actually making and committing to plans to meet up even for a quick coffee is a positive thing that I find helps me.</p><p> </p><p>I don't know if I have helped at all, but I hope you know that it actually doesn't matter what others think about you, you are unique and wonderful and talented in your own way <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":grinning_squinting_face:\">😆</span> Take care and stay in touch with people on here, write back to posts and see where it takes you x</p></div>", "date": "06-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/social-anxiety-really-makes-relationships-hard/td-p/573891" }, { "author": "user-id/48834", "content": "<p>I don't have great answers but I can share my own experience with social anxiety.</p><p> </p><p>One of my sons suffered from social anxiety when he was a around 15. I can't be sure when the problem started. He was a very popular kid in school during the primary. But when he was transferred to a new secondary school mid term, he couldn't quick fit in. We found out later that he was badly bullied by his classmates. He really suffered over a few years and his grades went from bad to worse. We were upset with his academic performance and didn't fully understand his school life. His teachers could only help in a limited way. We eventually took him to see a psychologist. That was a big help to him but the school environment hasn't changed.</p><p> </p><p>We eventually transferred him to a new school for his year 11 and 12. That was the best move we've done for him. He had moved to a new school environment with a clean slate. He made new friends, settled into the new school and began to deliver good academic results. He also found a girl friend, I think the new school, new friends and a girl friend all played a critical role in his transformation.</p><p> </p><p>He is now happily married, works as a manager in a professional environment, is highly respected at work and found a deep interest martial arts. Recently, he was part of an Australian team, representing Australia at a world championship. We are so happy that he has managed to escape from the shadows of his social anxiety.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "07-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/social-anxiety-really-makes-relationships-hard/td-p/573891" }, { "author": "user-id/48202", "content": "<p>Dear Janie223,</p><p>How brave you are to discuss your issues on the forum. I think you have come to the right place to feel more comfortable with communication.</p><p>Did something happen in your childhood to cause your social anxiety? I have found it's not worth worrying what people think because you'll probably never know. I'm very eccentric and direct. Some people don't like that but others do. It's how I am and I can't really change.</p><p>Please continue posting on the forum. I would love to hear more about you and I'm sure I can speak for everyone who posts that we are keen to support you. </p><p>I feel lonely at times but I find that my communications on this forum help me to stsy in contact with others.</p><p>Warmest regards Janie223,</p><p>Richju xx</p></div>", "date": "10-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/social-anxiety-really-makes-relationships-hard/td-p/573891" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48913", "content": "<p>I know it is bad to go through peoples phones, but I had the urge to do it with my boyfriends phone. We had a fight a week ago because I get uncomfortable with him hanging out with girls he’s friends with (especially because most of them he’s liked or had a thing with). My previous relationship I was cheated on, and I feel like this trauma has followed me into this relationship and I don’t know how to work on it. My boyfriend and I came up with a compromise about him seeing this girl he wanted to hang out with which was to see her once a week maximum in a non-suggestive environment.</p><p> </p><p>Later on when I went through his phone I went into the conversation with his friend, while we were still fighting he was confiding in her about how he feels etc, and he said “do we still have that pact that when we turn 40 and we’re still single we are going to marry each other” and she agreed. Now I can’t stop thinking about what I’ve read, and I can’t bring it up with him because then he’ll know I went through his phone. I feel like I am so easily replaceable, and my self-esteem is so low. I need to work on this but I don’t know how to become comfortable with him hanging out with girls he used to like or had a thing with.</p></div>", "date": "10-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/my-boyfriend-hanging-out-with-girls-makes-me-uncomfortable/td-p/574151" }, { "author": "user-id/43559", "content": "<p>Hi maya7895</p><p> </p><p>im sorry your having a hard time with this situation, can u discuss it with your boyfriend? The context of that your uncomfortable with him hanging out with his friends( previous attraction to these friends ect ) i think you should be clean about going thru ur boyfriend phone from my experience you can’t base a relationship on hiding things or trying  to control his interactions with this girl and the amount of times he sees her ect that also but boundaries on him and he will naturally rebel against those boundaries ( such as he’s hiding these conversations with his friend Re : his relationship status at 40 &amp; your worrying cause he’s talking to these friends in this context) also can you ask yourself Do you see yourself in this relationship when your 40 ? Or in the near future? As it seems a few trust issues are at play regardless of your issues with being cheated on in the past As in you can’t trust him &amp; he may or may not be making you uncomfortable with him hanging with girls he’s been attracted to / been in relationships with.  It would be even weirder if you were say to date a man with no female friends that would be red flags everywhere, if possible you can look at it this way too . From my perspective he should be honest about his feelings/ future with u , and u in turn be honest with him about your needs , there should be some understanding : compromise between you both .self esteem is hard to achieve especially in relationships where u may not feel as valued , respected as you should   .ask yourself is this relationship working for you and him and go from there but first always is to be honest with ur boyfriend and yourself as this is the basis of a healthy relationship honestly, respect, understanding, friendship.</p></div>", "date": "10-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/my-boyfriend-hanging-out-with-girls-makes-me-uncomfortable/td-p/574151" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/34847", "content": "<p>On Friday I was told People had concerns about my work and I was being put on a performance improvement plan. It felt like it came out of the blue as nothing was said to me before this.  I’m terribly worried that loosing my current job will lead me into unemployment, threaten my ability to pay my rent and worse of all my loosing the time I get with my kids. <br><br></p><p>I work in a role that doesn’t come up for employment very often and up to this point I’ve relied on my reputation and hard work to get these roles as I’m not particularly well educated or qualified. <br><br></p><p>I think I can pick up components and do better in some areas but the pressure I’m under is intense and I’m feeling overwhelmed and sick thinking about it. <br><br></p><p>I don’t know if the plan is a genuine opportunity for me to improve or just a paper trail for my employer to begin my termination. <br><br></p><p> </p></div>", "date": "03-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-m-terribly-afraid-of-loosing-my-job/td-p/573708" }, { "author": "user-id/14386", "content": "<p><span>hello and welcome,</span></p><p> </p><p><span>This sounds like an incredibly stressful situation. It's understandable to feel worried about the future. I know t it's to assume the worst will happen. Try not to assume the worst yet though - a performance plan may be a genuine chance to improve. Be open about your concerns with your employer so you're on the same page. Focus on the areas you can control, like putting in extra effort and asking for support when needed. </span></p><p> </p><p><span>While I don't know how long you have been at this job, you would have the skills and talents needed. Have faith in yourself. Stay hopeful through the process. You've got this, and better opportunities lie ahead if needed. You're stronger than you know.</span></p></div>", "date": "03-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-m-terribly-afraid-of-loosing-my-job/td-p/573708" }, { "author": "user-id/34847", "content": "<p>Thank you for your reply, It doesn't solve my problem but it helps knowing there are caring people out there. This event has really rocked my trust, I had thought that if there were concerns they would have been discussed long before we went down such an official pathway. I feel so overwhelmed at the moment I am really struggling to stay positive or focused and time off isn't an option as that will just compound the issue.</p></div>", "date": "04-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-m-terribly-afraid-of-loosing-my-job/td-p/573708" }, { "author": "user-id/14386", "content": "<p>You said ...</p><p> </p><p><em>\"I had thought that if there were concerns they would have been discussed long before we went down such an official pathway.\"</em></p><p> </p><p><span>I agree with you 110%. It would be very frustrating to find out that nothing is being said until it gets official. I think it is also worse when it comes for unofficial channels or gossip. And each day that nothing happens is another day to ruminate on the issue. I wonder if you have considered having a chat with your manager about this?</span></p></div>", "date": "04-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-m-terribly-afraid-of-loosing-my-job/td-p/573708" }, { "author": "user-id/34847", "content": "<p>Unfortunately, I'm too afraid to speak up, It's too easy for people to find ways to become offended and once they are defensive of their actions they tend to go all out trying to prove they were right. For now, it looks like I'm just going to have to live under this shadow even though I now dread coming into what I once believed to be a supportive workplace.</p></div>", "date": "05-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-m-terribly-afraid-of-loosing-my-job/td-p/573708" }, { "author": "user-id/32607", "content": "<p>I completely understand the feeling. You are not alone. I had a manager leave 4 years ago which left me with feelings of inadequacy and doubt. I actually got diagnosed with depression. The replacement who ended up being a supportive manager is not also leaving which is again brining up feelings of anxiety. I feel my mind and body feeling anxious with ruminating thoughts like - how am I going to pay my mortgage? What will my kids think? Will I have balance in my life or am I just going to work 16 hour days in the future? For now I think it's best to take one step, day at a time. You are not alone.</p></div>", "date": "06-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-m-terribly-afraid-of-loosing-my-job/td-p/573708" }, { "author": "user-id/34847", "content": "<p>Thank you cv02, it's the most all-consuming thing at the moment. Money does not buy happiness but my wage keeps a roof over my children's heads and food in their bellies. Our life is humble by many people's standards but when I have to think about the possibility of job hunting and rearranging school and care routines, cutting back etc. well I've not had a decent night's sleep for I don't know how long.</p></div>", "date": "07-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-m-terribly-afraid-of-loosing-my-job/td-p/573708" }, { "author": "user-id/14386", "content": "<p><span>It's evident that you're doing everything you can to provide for your children, and that's incredibly commendable. Remember, it's okay to feel the weight of these responsibilities, and your dedication as a parent is remarkable. If you ever need someone to chat to ... I and the others are here. Our experiences might not be the same but the thoughts and feelings .... </span></p><p> </p><p><span>Listening</span></p></div>", "date": "07-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-m-terribly-afraid-of-loosing-my-job/td-p/573708" }, { "author": "user-id/34847", "content": "<p>I think after becoming a single dad the realisation that I am the only plan B really hit me hard. I’m so lonely when my kids are gone and I have no friends to turn to. Life looks like it’s going to be a struggle with one complication after another until I’m dead and gone. </p></div>", "date": "10-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-m-terribly-afraid-of-loosing-my-job/td-p/573708" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48891", "content": "<p>I suffer from PTSD, anxiety disorder and depression.</p><p>I have been seeing therapists and medical professionals on and off for 5 years.</p><p>I was doing very well for over a year and was able to manage my anxiety.</p><p>I recently started a new job in June and start of August, I've had a relapse and I'm getting panic attacks 4-5 days a week. It's usually starts in the morning and I struggle through it on and off for half a day and get exhausted after it has calmed down and need to rest and am not able to do much. Because of this I haven't been able to go to work and now I'm worried that I might loose my job or what people think about me being absent or feel guilty that I have made things worse at work. These thoughts have made things worse.</p><p>I'm really tired of being in this loop. I'm taking medication, doing therapy but I'm still struggling and really fear I'll loose my job and have financial difficulty. I'm also scared I'll struggle to find another job.</p><p>I don't know what to do with all these thoughts that doesn't seem to stop.</p></div>", "date": "08-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-and-might-loose-my-job/td-p/574065" }, { "author": "user-id/40334", "content": "<p>Hi Lily181</p><p> </p><p>First of all, a massive credit to you for having found new ways to manage over the last year. I imagine that came from a heck of a lot of hard work. In this new challenge you face, do you think it feels like time to revisit one of the therapists so as to develop some new ideas and skill/s in managing? Sometimes new challenges need new skills. Perhaps it could also involve gaining some insight in regard to some new triggers you haven't come across before that maybe aren't all that obvious.</p><p> </p><p>I'm not sure if the following will be of any help but I'll put it out there anyway in the hope that it helps with perspective. While I've managed the ins and outs of depression since my late teens (I'm now a 53yo gal), I used to seriously beat myself up when I'd enter into a depressing period. There'd be the usual dialogue like 'What's wrong with me? I'm hopeless. I'm never going to be happy' etc. I eventually realised every depressing period was presenting me with a challenge I could <em>feel</em> but not necessarily identify at first. The ultimate challenge became about 1)acknowledging I could <em>feel</em> what was present (certain depressing elements), 2)identifying what they were (with or without some form of guidance and support), 3)identifying the skills needed to manage and 4)developing/practicing those skills (much easier said than done in some cases). With anxiety being a whole new experience for me last year, I had to address a whole new lot of challenges. Researching how inner dialogue impacts the nervous system became a part of that challenge.</p><p> </p><p>A new job can be a massive overall challenge, with a lot of micro challenges included. Some of the challenges: Identifying which staff members are triggering and <em>why </em>(while also figuring out how to manage those people), working out how much new information we can tolerate learning at a time, whether we're making up for <em>mismanagement</em> when it comes to under staffing perhaps, whether the environment is naturally stressful and that's something we can feel, whether our co-workers show compassion through remembering what it was like to be the new person, whether we've got the self esteem needed for the job or whether that needs to be developed a little more in some ways, the list goes on.  </p><p> </p><p>I think we can get a <em>feel</em> for what suits us and what doesn't, under different circumstances. Feeling our way through life is definitely a Goldilocks experience at times. Too hot, too cold, just right. Too soft, too hard, just right. Based on how we feel in the present, doesn't mean we can't return to a particular job or position later down the track, once we've evolved in a number of ways through greater levels of self understanding and skill development. Perhaps the question comes down to 'Does the job <em>feel</em> just right or does it feel like something else altogether different?'. Does it feel like you could master it or does it feel like your nervous system is screaming 'THERE'S A MUCH BETTER JOB OUT THERE THAN THIS ONE!'?</p></div>", "date": "09-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-and-might-loose-my-job/td-p/574065" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48883", "content": "<p>Hello! </p><p>I've been on Anti Anxiety medication for a few months now but I'm looking at applying for the WA police force. I'm wanting to know if this would hinder my chances of being accepted? </p></div>", "date": "07-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anti-anxiety-medication-and-applying-for-wa-police/td-p/574009" }, { "author": "user-id/32332", "content": "<p>Dear Copgirl379~</p><p>Welcome to the forum, a wise move as it might give you ideas from some others. I was a policeman and invalided out wiht PTSD,depressions and anxiety. I had none of these  when I joined.</p><p> </p><p>This leads me to the first point I'd like to make. Being in police is a very stressful job at the best of times and you are prone to anxiety - I presume because otherwise you would not be on meds.</p><p> </p><p>I would think that the job would simply make your anxiety worse, or if you had reduced it , bring it back. This leaves you eventually dreading each day and may end up like me. Anxiety and accompanying medication may affect reaction times and even judgment.</p><p> </p><p>The second half of my answer concerns formal medical qualifications to join. Some forces like Victoria Police I believe allow a person to join if they have been symptom free for 12 months. wiht other forces it varies.</p><p> </p><p>Can I suggest you first of all talk wiht your doctor and see what is recommended. If you were to get the OK then approach the WA Police recruiting department at</p><p><a href=\"https://letsjoinforces.wa.gov.au/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://letsjoinforces.wa.gov.au/</a></p><p>and set out your all medical details, including anxiety in full and get their opinion.</p><p> </p><p>What I would not suggest is to simply not mention the matter, as this can have all sorts of complications</p><p> </p><p>So the short answer is ask them and see.</p><p> </p><p>Croix</p></div>", "date": "07-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anti-anxiety-medication-and-applying-for-wa-police/td-p/574009" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/39880", "content": "<p>Hi guys, for years I’ve been battling severe anxiety/borderline agoraphobia. But my main complaint besides that is body swelling. Does anyone else experience this? Constantly swollen. </p></div>", "date": "25-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/body-swelling-from-anxiety-anyone-else/td-p/573103" }, { "author": "user-id/32332", "content": "<p>Dear Soph33~</p><p>I'd like to welcome you back, it's been quite a while  since you were here before and I hope the times have been good to you.</p><p> </p><p>It has also taken a fair while for you to receive an answer to your post. Sometimes the system does not work as we would like it to. Please rest assured the delay is nothing to do with you or the subject-matter of your post.</p><p> </p><p>I've had an anxiety condition for a long time and it has had many physical effects from headaches to chest pain. However the only swelling I can put down to anxiety is either eating becuse it feels good, or else the side effect of some medications. Both make me put on weight . Never just straight swelling.</p><p> </p><p>Now I know everyone is different and anxiety comes out in different ways, however before putting something down to a mental health condition I think it would be only sensible to rule out all straight physical possibilities first. I had to do this by being scanned and monitored for headaches and chest pain for instance.</p><p> </p><p>Do you think it might be worth discussing this with a doctor before gong any further? At least negative tests can stop one worrying about physical causes and give more attention to your anxiety treatment.</p><p> </p><p>What do you think?</p><p> </p><p>Croix</p></div>", "date": "05-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/body-swelling-from-anxiety-anyone-else/td-p/573103" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/47944", "content": "<p>I’m incredibly anxious about moving house. I’m retired. We live in a large home and moving to an apartment. Typical downsizing. The process of selling one home and moving into another is stressful and unsettling. I can’t help but think of the things that could go wrong. Will we sell?  Will I like the apartment etc etc. </p></div>", "date": "20-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/moving-home/td-p/568350/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/47640", "content": "<p>Hello Johan71,</p><p>How did things go with the house on the weekend?</p><p>indigo22</p></div>", "date": "26-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/moving-home/td-p/568350/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/47944", "content": "<p>Thanks for following up. I’m pleased to say we sold, at a price more than we expected. Still anxious about what’s ahead but at least one worry bites the dust. </p></div>", "date": "26-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/moving-home/td-p/568350/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/47640", "content": "<p>That's great, I am very happy for you. Turns out you are one of the 9 out of 10 <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":grinning_face:\">😀</span></p><p>Hang in there,</p><p>indigo22</p></div>", "date": "26-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/moving-home/td-p/568350/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/47640", "content": "<p>Hi Johan71,</p><p>I am not sure what your timeline for moving was, have you moved as yet? If so, how did it go? And how are you felling about it all?</p><p>Hope all is well.</p><p>indigo22</p></div>", "date": "01-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/moving-home/td-p/568350/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/47944", "content": "<p>Dear Indigo</p><p>V grateful for your follow up.  And yes, while the move is not quite finalised, arrangements are proceeding well. And fortunately, my anxiety has abated somewhat. I’ve decided to get some professional help once the move is over. One of perplexing things about general anxiety disorder (at least for me) is that, as one set of (now proven) irrational fears fall away, another set quickly emerges to take their place. Uncertainty about what might happen, and the simple fact that you can’t speed up time to see whether those fears emerge or not, constantly challenges the mind. I’ve read a lot about mindfulness to block out irrational thoughts, but like most things, easier said than done. I hope the professional help will help overcome or at least mitigate that. </p><p>Best wishes, and thanks again for taking the time to write.</p><p>Johan71</p></div>", "date": "02-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/moving-home/td-p/568350/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/47640", "content": "<p>I am so glad to hear everything is going well with the move and to hear that you are going to get some help managing your anxiety. You and I are on opposite ends of the scale, you are all about what might happen with your anxiety and I am all about what has happened with my depression. We will be here to support you if/when you need us. I wish you every success moving forward Johan.</p></div>", "date": "02-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/moving-home/td-p/568350/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/47944", "content": "<p>Dear Indigo</p><p> </p><p>I thought I should touch base to see how you are going. We are all settled and adapting to apartment life. Even the dog is getting used to it. While still some mental adjustment to go through (I’ve lived kin suburbia all my life), all has worked out well. Your last email about opposite ends of the scale got me to thinking. My anxiety (and perhaps many others) was about what might happen. Yours, is about what has happened. Whilst people can plan for what’s ahead, and learn from what has happened in the past, in both cases there is little that a person can do about either. What will happen will happen, and what’s done is done. I guess the moral of the story is to live in the present if one can. Best wishes. And thanks again for taking an interest. Kind regards. Johan71</p></div>", "date": "05-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/moving-home/td-p/568350/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/47944", "content": "<p>I’m incredibly anxious about moving house. I’m retired. We live in a large home and moving to an apartment. Typical downsizing. The process of selling one home and moving into another is stressful and unsettling. I can’t help but think of the things that could go wrong. Will we sell?  Will I like the apartment etc etc. </p></div>", "date": "20-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/moving-home/td-p/568350" }, { "author": "user-id/47640", "content": "<p>Hello Johan71,</p><p>Welcome, I am glad you have come here to get some support. I don't have a lot of experience with anxiety, my forte is depression, however, I saw your post and wanted to do my best to support you until someone sees your post that does have more experience with anxiety. I have had a lot of experience with moving and it is one of the more stressful events in life. I know it is hard to leave somewhere where you feel safe and comfortable and take a leap into the unknown, I can only imagine that it is even more so for you. Yes things can go wrong when moving but 9 times out of 10 things will go smoothly so it may help to think of yourself as one of the 9 and try not to imagine the worst case scenario. I moved 360km from where I lived just a few years ago. I am on my own and bought a house that I had seen for about 10 minutes and I moved to a town where I did not know a soul. But the I knew the first morning when I woke up that I had made the right decision. Take your time and find an apartment that feels right to you, feels like home when you walk into it, then look forward to your retirement with much less area to take care of and more time to do the things that make you happy.</p><p>I wish you all the best.</p><p>indigo22</p></div>", "date": "20-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/moving-home/td-p/568350" }, { "author": "user-id/47944", "content": "<p>Thank you for taking the time to reply. It is very much appreciated. I was initially sceptical about the forum but you have given me optimism about its value.  I really don’t understand why the anxiety has taken control of my negative thoughts. I’m only moving from an outer suburb to an inner suburb, perhaps only 15 minutes drive. Hardly 360 km! It seems that I’m simply scared that my so far perfect retirement will be upended. I know its simply irrational. Regards</p></div>", "date": "20-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/moving-home/td-p/568350" }, { "author": "user-id/43202", "content": "<p>Johan71</p><p><br>Thznms fir your honesty. People will read your words but not reply. They will feel less alone. Moving house is one of the stressful life events. You  are acknowledging how you feel and that is a good start. <br>are you a list maker. I make lists and that helps me. </p></div>", "date": "20-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/moving-home/td-p/568350" }, { "author": "user-id/19477", "content": "<p>Moving can be stressful.  I’ve moved 5 times in my life and can’t say I enjoy any of the moves.  All I can say is that I settled into each new places very quickly. <br><br></p><p>Hope all goes well for you. </p></div>", "date": "20-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/moving-home/td-p/568350" }, { "author": "user-id/47944", "content": "<p>Thank you for taking the time to reply. I’ve moved several times as well but this is the first time the anxiety has affected me. Perhaps as we get older the less we like change. </p></div>", "date": "21-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/moving-home/td-p/568350" }, { "author": "user-id/47944", "content": "<p>Thank you for taking the time to reply. I’ve moved several times in my life, including interstate but this is the first time anxiety has affected my life. Perhaps as we get older change is less and less manageable. </p></div>", "date": "21-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/moving-home/td-p/568350" }, { "author": "user-id/47944", "content": "<p>You know, I think about my parents. They moved from post WW2 Europe to Australia. No family, no friends, no job, no English. Endured the German occupation of their homeland. Can’t imagine anything more stressful but they survived and prospered. It makes me think I’m pretty selfish that I’m having trouble handling this move.</p></div>", "date": "21-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/moving-home/td-p/568350" }, { "author": "user-id/47640", "content": "<p>You are not at all selfish, please don't put that label on yourself. You are just feeling unsettled at the moment and we can all understand that feeling. Just be gentle and kind with yourself, it is a big step and you are right, things effect us more the older we get. Try to not let that negative voice get the better of you.</p><p>Sending you a hug.</p><p>indigo22</p></div>", "date": "21-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/moving-home/td-p/568350" }, { "author": "user-id/47944", "content": "<p>Thank you again for your thoughts. My old home goes on auction this weekend. Nervous time! Best wishes </p></div>", "date": "21-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/moving-home/td-p/568350" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48710", "content": "<p>Hi all,</p><p> </p><p>just reaching out for some support. For the last 8 weeks I've had terrible anxiety, it's become so bad I'm not sure if I can survive it. I've been so anxious I find myself in places and I can't remember how I got there.</p><p> </p><p>It's work related. My boss is a bully who always criticises and gaslights me - and tells my colleaugues her mistakes are mine. She's really disorganised but also a micro manager which makes it incredibly hard. I'll send her a document to review and she'll send it back to me with a heap of negative feedback but she'll give the feedback on the wrong document. This happens all the time. Or she'll tell</p><p>me to do something, which I do, but she later tells me that it was wrong and why did I do it like that. When I point out her mistakes she just gets more angry.</p><p> </p><p>I don't trust HR, another staff member went to HR to make a complaint and they never even responded to her email.</p><p> </p><p>I'm lost. I need the job as I have young children - but how can I get through this?</p></div>", "date": "23-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/overwhelming-anxiety/td-p/572975" }, { "author": "user-id/16277", "content": "<p>Hi Doc80,</p><p> </p><p>I'm sorry to hear about what you're going through. Having a poor boss who is a bully can be the worst and I have been there unfortunately. It is a shame that your HR is not supportive. They should however document the incident/report as a bare minimum. If you find they are not addressing or at least acknowledging your concerns I might defer to Safework NSW. Here is a good place to start: <a href=\"https://www.safework.nsw.gov.au/safety-starts-here/mental-health-at-work-the-basics/bullying\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://www.safework.nsw.gov.au/safety-starts-here/mental-health-at-work-the-basics/bullying</a> </p><p> </p><p>Hope that helps.</p><p> </p><p>Bob</p></div>", "date": "24-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/overwhelming-anxiety/td-p/572975" }, { "author": "user-id/22470", "content": "<p>1) Definitely report it. Make sure everything is via email because then you have an official record if you get ignored. </p><p>2) Start looking around for a new job. You may feel you are stuck in your job but there are always other opportunities. </p><p>3) Keep correspondence with your boss via email as much as possible so you have a record of the interactions. </p><p>4) Remember that your boss has no real power over you. If you are a permanent employee. You have rights and as long as you are following your obligations, her attitude has nothing to do with you. The best way to beat a bully, is to shrug off their attempts to bring you down. </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "24-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/overwhelming-anxiety/td-p/572975" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48721", "content": "<p>Hi everyone</p><p> </p><p>I have been suffering from a major fear of death. The idea of one day never waking up terrifies me. I get mini panic attacks  when I first start thinking about this and then I go into a period of what I call mini depression. It usually dose  away eventually but I believe it is brought on with stress and anger. </p><p> </p><p>I also get  extremely stressed when something doesn't  go to plan or is outside the usual routine. i have no Idea how to deal with this anxiety. It get's to the point where I actually start crying. Sometimes it is over the stupid reasons for example, going on a walk, Doing something I don't want to do. I have told my parents about this and they usually brush it off or just say I am being unreasonable. I have  mentioned anxiety to them before and they said it is just teenage hormones. I do agree with them but I also believe it is something more. </p><p> </p><p>When I first started high school, I started getting bad anxiety and stress. After I lost most of  my friends I went into a depression. I have never told anyone about this as I usually  keep things to myself. by the end of the year I found friends and I was happy. by this year I have severe anxiety because of school and the idea's of death. my only escape from this is when I am with my friends. I spent a lot of time online because of this and my parents just say I am addicted. Maybe I am but A lot of people don't realise  it is a coping method for me. I was never an introvert but after years of bullying, teasing, stress and anxiety I keep to myself. </p><p> </p><p>Can anyone help me and maybe suggest how I can cope with all of this.  </p></div>", "date": "24-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/fear-of-death-and-general-anxiety/td-p/573034" }, { "author": "user-id/19707", "content": "<p>Hi, welcome </p><p> </p><p>It's a pretty scary place where you're at. I hope I can help.</p><p> </p><p>Humans,are intelligent creatures so we are very aware of our universe and our mortality and thinking about it can lead to high fear so that can be common.</p><p> </p><p>I hope you get the help you need</p><p> </p><p>TonyWK </p></div>", "date": "24-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/fear-of-death-and-general-anxiety/td-p/573034" }, { "author": "user-id/22470", "content": "<p>Fear of death is very normal. Evolution made us that way so we don't kill ourselves off. </p><p> </p><p>There are a few things that makes the idea of death less scary:</p><p>1) I've seen a few people at end of life and death is usually very peaceful. Our body slowly shuts down and modern medicine can make the process very manageable. </p><p>2) We were once not alive and it was not something that was traumatic. Death is just going back to that. </p><p>3) Religion. For a lot of people, religion helps them deal with the fear of death. </p><p> </p><p>You sound young. You have many years ahead of you. Don't let your fear take over the life you have now. </p></div>", "date": "24-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/fear-of-death-and-general-anxiety/td-p/573034" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48707", "content": "<p>These days I’ve been going through a tough time. I just moved to Australia in February for my master’s. I felt so happy to be here. But since June I was feeling very anxious regarding my health. I suffer from health anxiety &amp; I often get anxious thoughts. Recently I fell &amp; dislocated my knee, it happened during my uni trip. Even since I started feeling so anxious &amp; scared that I start assuming something definitely is wrong with me &amp; I’ll suffer. It got worse when I discovered a small lump in my body. I started assuming the worst possible things &amp; it flared up more when I searched on google. I can’t stop thinking about it 24/7, I can’t eat or sleep. I feel broken, I don’t like going to doctors, it makes me more anxious. The paragraph is getting too long…..</p></div>", "date": "23-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety/td-p/572951" }, { "author": "user-id/16277", "content": "<p>Hi AYU_227,</p><p> </p><p>Thanks for coming here. You have done great in identifying what you're experiencing as anxiety and specifically health anxiety. It's something very common and something I have struggled with. To the point that I would get shoulder and chest pain constantly simply as a result of my anxiety which would then make my anxiety worse. That being said, there is still a time and place to visit your doctor for specific issues. But if you find you're going back again and again for the same thing then that is a sign of health anxiety. Here is some good info and advice surrounding health anxiety: </p><p> </p><p><a href=\"https://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/Resources/Looking-After-Yourself/Health-Anxiety\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/Resources/Looking-After-Yourself/Health-Anxiety</a></p><p> </p><p>Bob</p></div>", "date": "24-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety/td-p/572951" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/13511", "content": "<p>To all the fellow sufferers of anxiety,</p>\n<p>Ever since I was a young child I have suffered from an extreme phobia of death. If I so much as think about it, I will have hot flushes and feel faint. My mind cannot fathom the thought of being here on earth, creating all of these loving relationships and then having it all erased.<span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\"> </span></p>\n<p><span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\">I'm not a religious person, so I don't have the comfort of saying to people 'see you on the other side' When for me, I have yet to </span><span style=\"line-height: 14px; font-size: 11px;\">experience</span><span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\"> any proof of this so called eternal life.</span></p>\n<p><span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\">I believe this fear is a large reason for my anxious and depressive personality. </span></p>\n<p><span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\">Does anybody have any feedback on there thoughts, feelings and fears of death.. I think I just need to talk about it.</span></p>\n<p><span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\">Hugs to all,</span></p>\n<p><span style=\"line-height: 14px; font-size: 11px;\">ChinUp.</span></p>\n<p><br>\n</p>\n<p><br>\n</p></div>", "date": "17-06-2013", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/4" }, { "author": "user-id/1155", "content": "<p>Hi Chin Up. Quite an interesting post inviting heaps of feedback. I'm inclined to believe we all have 'phobia's'. Whether it be fear of flying, spiders, ants, bees, etc. Death, unfortunately is reality with a capital R. There is no escape that one. However, fear of death, comes under phobia as phobia is fear. To stress on something unavoidable is also a type of phobia. People will often say, those who 'passed' must be content, they haven't returned. This can be extremely insensitive for someone who is mourning a recent loss. I myself do not fear death as I accept the inevitability of it. I kind of believe that death brings a release of intense pain. Not always, I grant you, but for the majority of people who pass from a terminal illness, it is a blessing both for them and friends and family who have suffered with them. We go through life with illnesses sometimes contracted from other people, or we are sometimes born with problems which can lead to death. DN129's last paragraph sums it up well. </p>\n<p>Lynda</p></div>", "date": "22-11-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/4" }, { "author": "user-id/27883", "content": "<p>I hope to find an answer too.</p>\n<p>I am constantly thinking I am dying, and constantly fighting off the thoughts. It's really exhausting.</p>\n<p> There are only two things that calm me down. Which is accepting that I will die one day. </p>\n<p>And laughing. Finding someone to laugh with about your thoughts, trying to brush them off. I often tell my dad and my grandmother the things I think, and we end up laughing and it can be calming. It sometimes brings me back to earth. And also laughing at things like youtube videos or something....... witty humour and sarcasm helps me. Oh and another one, listening to people who inspire you. Like musicians or actors. </p>\n<p>If you or anyone else on the thread ever need someone to laugh with or freak out with I'm here. Sometimes strangers are good. <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span></p></div>", "date": "23-11-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/4" }, { "author": "user-id/41968", "content": "<p>Hi, </p>\n<p>I myself have struggled with this and still am. I am religious but haven't always been.</p>\n<p>If you do believe in an afterlife I find this can be comforting. You don't need to be religious to believe in heaven. People I spoke to said when they see someone die it's almost like their soul left them. </p>\n<p>Well no matter what happens try to live in the moment. I know this doesn't really help but it's what I do.</p>\n<p>Best of luck! </p></div>", "date": "12-12-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/4" }, { "author": "user-id/18484", "content": "<p>Hi Chin Up, </p>\n<p>I hope you have found some peace within your own mind. I know how exhausting it is. I feel like your post could have been written by me, it is that accurate. It is becoming a regular issue now and I don't want to burden my family or make them think the way I do. (awful)... anyway I would love some words of wisdom so I can be better. I know the secret is always to avoid running from your problems, and facing them head on but I am terrified.</p>\n<p>Thanks in advance.</p></div>", "date": "05-07-2017", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/4" }, { "author": "user-id/10330", "content": "OMG I am also exactly like this ever sense I was first depressed (or probably more just worried) when i was 7/8, to now at 16, death has been the basis of all my depression and anxiety.</div>", "date": "29-01-2019", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/4" }, { "author": "user-id/48721", "content": "<p>Hey</p><p> </p><p>felt the same for ages, Mine is usually brought on by stress and anger. Keep your self busy and do something you love, It keeps my mind of it so maybe it will work for you!</p></div>", "date": "24-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/4" }, { "author": "user-id/13511", "content": "<p>To all the fellow sufferers of anxiety,</p>\n<p>Ever since I was a young child I have suffered from an extreme phobia of death. If I so much as think about it, I will have hot flushes and feel faint. My mind cannot fathom the thought of being here on earth, creating all of these loving relationships and then having it all erased.<span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\"> </span></p>\n<p><span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\">I'm not a religious person, so I don't have the comfort of saying to people 'see you on the other side' When for me, I have yet to </span><span style=\"line-height: 14px; font-size: 11px;\">experience</span><span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\"> any proof of this so called eternal life.</span></p>\n<p><span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\">I believe this fear is a large reason for my anxious and depressive personality. </span></p>\n<p><span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\">Does anybody have any feedback on there thoughts, feelings and fears of death.. I think I just need to talk about it.</span></p>\n<p><span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\">Hugs to all,</span></p>\n<p><span style=\"line-height: 14px; font-size: 11px;\">ChinUp.</span></p>\n<p><br>\n</p>\n<p><br>\n</p></div>", "date": "17-06-2013", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/20154", "content": "<span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 16px;\"> </span>\n<p style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 16px;\">Hi there</span></p>\n<span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 16px;\"> </span>\n<p style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 16px;\"> </span></p>\n<span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 16px;\"> </span>\n<p style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 16px;\">A truly fascinating thread – been a long time reader of this particular one, but first time poster.</span></p>\n<span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 16px;\"> </span>\n<p style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 16px;\"> </span></p>\n<span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 16px;\"> </span>\n<p style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 16px;\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: 16px;\">I’m like a few others on here – my feelings about it do lace me with incredible sadness and other feelings, which are almost too hard to describe.</span>  <span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: 16px;\">I’ve lost my mum and dad and also my closest brother.</span>  <span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: 16px;\">They’re all gone now and that saddens me greatly.</span>   <span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: 16px;\">I don’t go to the cemetery where they are – because all that’s there is a lovely manicured lawn and shrubs and a plaque, with a photo and words.</span></span></p>\n<span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 16px;\"> </span>\n<p style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 16px;\"> </span></p>\n<span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 16px;\"> </span>\n<p style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 16px;\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: 16px;\">For me, when you die, I believe it’s like when you are put “under” to have an operation.</span>  <span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: 16px;\">Black-out – nothing, that’s it.</span>   <span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: 16px;\">Fortunately though, with operations you wake up (well, I have so far, and I’ve had well into my teens of times going under) – but while under it’s nothingness and no dreams had.</span>  <span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: 16px;\">That’s it – it’s all over.</span>   <span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: 16px;\">Whatever you were that day or the previous is gone.</span></span></p>\n<span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 16px;\"> </span>\n<p style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 16px;\"> </span></p>\n<span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 16px;\"> </span>\n<p style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 16px;\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: 16px;\">Someone mentioned that when they die, everything about them is also gone – but then, I think I read where another person said that when someone dies, who’s had influence on others (notably children) that they still kind of live on.</span>  <span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: 16px;\">I understand what is being said there, but really not sure about that.</span></span></p>\n<span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 16px;\"> </span>\n<p style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 16px;\"> </span></p>\n<span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 16px;\"> </span>\n<p style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 16px;\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: 16px;\">I know of all the stuff my brother used to do and sometimes I do similar things – but that is my choosing to do so;</span>  <span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: 16px;\">or to say similar quotes etc;</span>  <span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: 16px;\">and the same for Mum and Dad also.</span>  <span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: 16px;\">Sure they’ve left those things with me, but they’re still gone and for me, nothing will ever change that.</span></span></p>\n<span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 16px;\"> </span>\n<p style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 16px;\"> </span></p>\n<span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 16px;\"> </span>\n<p style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 16px;\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: 16px;\">Likewise, I will no doubt pass on things to my two children – and the other thing they’ll have of mine to keep and to hold on to, are my daily diaries that I write.</span>  <span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: 16px;\">I’ve journelled </span> <span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: 16px;\">my life for over 21 years now – about whatever happens to me each day (or to my family) and sometimes others;</span>  <span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: 16px;\">my feelings, thoughts, etc etc.</span>   <span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: 16px;\">So whether they find it to be of any interest, that’s up to them, but they’ll be theirs to have.</span></span></p>\n<span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 16px;\"> </span>\n<p style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 16px;\"> </span></p>\n<span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 16px;\"> </span>\n<p style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 16px;\">I could go on and on about this, but fear my word limit is up.</span></p>\n<span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 16px;\"> </span>\n<p style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 16px;\"> </span></p>\n<span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 16px;\"> </span>\n<p style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 16px;\">Neil</span></p>\n<span style=\"color: #000000; font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 16px;\"> </span></div>", "date": "04-05-2015", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/16522", "content": "<p>Hi Chin Up,</p>\n<p>This is a very common fear to have, but I for one, don't have a fear of death, I work in an industry that I often deal with the dying and deceased.</p>\n<p>I have never had an experience which has \"scared\" me, I just think your body is just the carriage for your soul, and once you die that spirit has gone to where ever you would like it to be. People do ask me \"how can you do that work\" but I find it a comfort to look after people, sad as it is, and I treat people the same if they are alive or deceased.</p>\n<p>Your life and memories are treasured by those you leave behind, never forgotten your presence on earth  has left a permanent imprint on those you love and who love you, so don't ever think people are not embracing your life.</p>\n<p>I wonder if people are scared of being dead or the actual \"physical death\"process, again I have seen many deaths and I think when the physical signs of life have gone they just seem to be asleep, the body is there but \"they \" are gone.. to where I don't know ,that is up to the individual's personal choice.</p>\n<p>We mourn for a lot of things in life, thats normal, we dwell on the \"what ifs\", its because we think of others and how they will react , they will miss us, need us, want us, of course they will, you were part of someones life  and upon death become a precious beautiful memory to treasure, and life will go on, but you will always be part of it.</p>\n<p>So don't be worried or stressed out about something that is uncontrollable, be happy for the wonderful life you have now and love and enjoy your family and friends, its true life is precious, I have learnt material things won't make you happy  and they are not that important , but to watch a sunset, hear a kitten purr, have your child hug you and tell you ,you are the best mum in the world and they love you, thats heaven to me.</p>\n<p>Take care</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>July</p></div>", "date": "04-05-2015", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/19707", "content": "<p>Hi July,</p>\n<p>That was so wonderful a reply.</p>\n<p>You have come a long way forward in a short time.</p>\n<p>Regards Tony WK</p></div>", "date": "05-05-2015", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/16522", "content": "<p>Hi Tony,</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>Yes ,thank you with some invaluable help from such kind people as yourself, to look inside one's self can be daunting, but also an awakening to and to realise some things in life are out of your control and are not your fault.</p>\n<p>To focus on the good and not dwell on the bad, thats the mission to strive for, one step at a time and thats all anyone can do.</p>\n<p>Thanks</p>\n<p>July</p></div>", "date": "05-05-2015", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/1282", "content": "<p>I am a 61 year Old lady who has suffered PTSD and panic attackes that led  to Agoraphobia, I am now having dizzy spells and have had Brain Scans that were clear,Throat ulta sound that was clear and my blood works were good ,I am going through a real hard time at the moment with the Death fear,time is running out and I am so scared,IN the past year and a half I have lost so many loved ones the latest being my eldest sister to liver can in Feb last year and my best friend 5 days later, I cannot get rid of this terrible fear it is eating me away.i am dizzy weak and Doctors cannot find out why.It did start with a virus in my throat ,but also a lot of stress at the same time,</p>\n<p>When I say I am scared of death I mean terrified ,My solar plexus throbs with adrenaline I am shaky and I cannot think of anything else but that death is just around the corner and I have convinced myself that this just cannot be a dizzy virus and that I am dying. I feel so horrified and I cannot sleep .I jump out of bed and start the scared rumination of what could be wrong with me ,why wont it go away then the thought I am dying comes into play. I am sitting here typing this bobbing up and sown in dizziness and my tummy is alive with electricity, I am so very, very scared</p>\n<p>Helen</p></div>", "date": "06-05-2015", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/16522", "content": "<p>Hi Helen,</p>\n<p>I am sorry to hear you are having such a difficult time with your feelings, the mind is a powerful thing and can over ride most anything.</p>\n<p>As you said your medical results came back normal which is great, so I feel it is the emotional side  of you that needs attention, you would benefit from seeing someone to talk to, express your fears and possibly medication to calm your nerves.</p>\n<p>We have all lost family to cancer and other illnesses, this is a sad part of life but nothing we can do anything about, in reality when you think about it logically we are all going to die eventually, we are not immortal, none of us.</p>\n<p>It is an experience no one wants to discuss, its a taboo, it makes us fear our own mortality, none of us know how long have on this earth do we? so maybe think how lucky we are to be here to enjoy this wonderful life, and not waste precious time dwelling on the negative.</p>\n<p>Easier said than done yes, but trying a new perspective won't hurt maybe looking at the glass \"half full\" rather than \"half empty\".</p>\n<p>I wish you all the best and take care of yourself.</p>\n<p>July</p></div>", "date": "06-05-2015", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/24037", "content": "<p>Hi Chin Up</p>\n<p>Besides getting treatment, what I may suggest is books by Irvin D. Yalom, a top psychiatrist from US who wrote several books. His main approach is focusing on being scared from Death. His approach is usually called as existential psychiatry.  </p>\n<p>His novels and stories are very good starts to understand the issue. </p>\n<p>Regards</p>\n<p>GT</p>\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "06-05-2015", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/39444", "content": "Since procrastination is one of my vices, I've recently become aware of and interested in the concept of the \"memento mori\" (\"Remember [that you have] to die\") - something like a skull on your desk, to remind you to think on what's really important because YOU GONNA DIE, SUCKA.  Maybe you guys could try refocus your anxiety into something positive, in that vein.</div>", "date": "15-05-2015", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/27650", "content": "<p>Hi, </p>\n<p>I just read your description of your phobia and I have pretty much the exact same thing. I went to a psychologist about it last year and I have been fine up until recently, now it's started to become a problem again.</p>\n<p>Do you have any tricks you use to calm yourself down or to stop thinking about it? I can't seem to stop thinking about it and the fear doesn't go away completely until I have already had and calmed down from a panic attack. </p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>Any tips you have would be really appreciated, I just need some help with it and don't want to tell my mum about it or have to pay for a psychologist unless I have to.</p>\n<p>Thank you</p></div>", "date": "21-11-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/3362", "content": "<p>While I unfortunately don't know the answer to the problem, I think being scared of death is fundamentally a human condition at its core. We all suffer from it to some extent and its also at the bottom of most anxiety conditions when you explore them deeper.</p>\n<p>It would have evolved with us like any personality trait, the humans (or pre-humans) who were scared of death would have been better represented in the population base, as they avoided death and spread their genetics, which leads to us here and now. The humans, or pre-human species who weren't concerned about death probably wouldn't have been that successful long term and unlikely to have created and raised children to adulthood.</p>\n<p> So I think at the base of it we're all in some way really really scared of death and its normal. </p>\n<p> How to approach it and frame it is the harder issue. To me the comforting thing about death is that every human who has ever lived (over 100 billion of us and counting) have experienced death and it will be the one thing that every single one of us has in common. I don't think that necessarily makes it easier to face, we are literally built to fear death. But I do sometimes think the fact its a mutually experienced condition can make it easier to come to terms with.</p></div>", "date": "21-11-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/13511", "content": "<p>To all the fellow sufferers of anxiety,</p>\n<p>Ever since I was a young child I have suffered from an extreme phobia of death. If I so much as think about it, I will have hot flushes and feel faint. My mind cannot fathom the thought of being here on earth, creating all of these loving relationships and then having it all erased.<span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\"> </span></p>\n<p><span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\">I'm not a religious person, so I don't have the comfort of saying to people 'see you on the other side' When for me, I have yet to </span><span style=\"line-height: 14px; font-size: 11px;\">experience</span><span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\"> any proof of this so called eternal life.</span></p>\n<p><span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\">I believe this fear is a large reason for my anxious and depressive personality. </span></p>\n<p><span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\">Does anybody have any feedback on there thoughts, feelings and fears of death.. I think I just need to talk about it.</span></p>\n<p><span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\">Hugs to all,</span></p>\n<p><span style=\"line-height: 14px; font-size: 11px;\">ChinUp.</span></p>\n<p><br>\n</p>\n<p><br>\n</p></div>", "date": "17-06-2013", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/11941", "content": "<p>Hi Chin up,</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>That must feel horrible.  I have never had that problem but do suffer anxiety. I find Allan Watts lectures on youtube helpm me with my fear alot.  Here is one about fear of death that might help you a bit.</p>\n<p><a href=\"http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Rz4ReNv6M8\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Rz4ReNv6M8</a></p>\n<p> </p>\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "31-07-2013", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/28371", "content": "<p>Lately I have been unsure about death myself. Currently 22 and overweight, I recently lost my dog and with a few other things it has been making me ponder about life. Was trying to go to sleep after having a family dinner and I was having panic attacks wondering what would happen once I die. If it helps I'm also agnostic - so I don't believe in any religion but I do hope something appears. </p>\n<p> Two things have helped me understand it better</p>\n<p> #1 -  I'm too young to understand, it will be more familiar once I am closer to death</p>\n<p> #2 - Circle of life and death must continue (popular character quote from someone in league of legends)</p>\n<p>This helped me find some closer knowing we all must die sometime for life to continue however I was still curious - I wanted to understand more about why we die and the afterlife.</p>\n<p>Naturally I have been reading what I can off the web and have found some closure in the words of scientists to understand death a little better - in particular Einstein. I find research scientists and their views on religion is quite peaceful. However at the end of the day I was born from nature, I live off nature and I will return to nature once I die. Once I accepted this I began to think of the afterlife and meaning of life. If I am here to aid nature, what happens afterwards? Maybe Reincarnation? </p>\n<p>Hence what I am still anxious about is the afterlife, the possibility of a soul and whether I will be with my family after I die. With this I have nothing but faith to go off and the wisdom of others. I have little faith to begin with but I do believe (with long talks from my Mother) that those that have gone before me are looking out for me. My Dad believes his family are there waiting for him. Then my thoughts go crazy ... Scientists are researching the possibility of a soul, If Energy is neither created nor destroyed then where do I go? Will I still be with my family or see them? Will I feel love? Will I still exist?</p>\n<p>Don't know what happens after death if anything and I can accept that. I just want to know if I still have my family after death and it scares me. The idea of reincarnation and losing my family scares me more. My mother believes I am grieving at the moment but I still want to hope. Any ideas?</p></div>", "date": "09-08-2013", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/21739", "content": "<p><strong>\"Death, where is thy sting ?\"    quote from The Bible.</strong></p>\n<p><strong>Dear Chin Up,</strong></p>\n<p><strong>Most talk about death merely gives death importance.  There are a billion other ideas to think about and enjoy.  Even \"Dukes of Hazzard\".</strong></p>\n<p><strong></strong></p>\n<p><strong>Adios, David.</strong></p>\n<p><strong>PS  Sorry, my Bold is stuck.<br>\n</strong> </p></div>", "date": "09-08-2013", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/12824", "content": "<p>Hi Chin Up,</p>\n<p>I think it is normal to worry about dying if you think about it. It would seem that mostly I avoid thinking about it. <span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\">I can remember the first time I really worried about dying as a teenager. I had been raised religious but lying in bed one night I was overcome with fear. I could just not envision anything past death. There was only darkness. After that I needed a distraction to get myself to sleep, reading, radio, counting things etc. </span><span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\">Then after awhile I started thinking I may as well just enjoy myself because everyone over 35 seemed miserable anyway. Obviously this is not true but it made me feel better at the time. It broke the negative thinking. Peace, Chris.</span></p>\n<p><br>\n</p>\n<p><br>\n</p>\n<p><br>\n</p></div>", "date": "12-08-2013", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/26217", "content": "<p>Its not usually until someone dies close to us, when question or wonder about death.</p>\n<p>I seriously think there is nothing for you to worry about, because when it happen, what will be will be. It is usually those left behind who do the worrying and grieving which is the bad part. </p>\n<p>Try not to focus on dying, if you have beliefs this can be reassuring. I'm not religious but believe we leave our bodies and our spirit goes and joins loved ones on the other side. This can be reassuring to know we go to a place where no one is in pain and a place that is pretty cool.</p>\n<p>Maybe read some books or google beliefs.. i found reading about life after death experiences reassuring and when a elderly person has passed around me, i feel reassured they are meeting their loved ones and moving like a youngin again lol,bit harder when younger people die but still knowing they are pain free is nice.</p></div>", "date": "20-08-2013", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/21739", "content": "<p>Dear S.A.D.</p>\n<p>Your post suggested writing an essay about death and it's impact.  Pondering on the writing.   Digesting the threat.</p>\n<p>If one is contemplating death then there's a good chance your mind won't be too analytical or into essays !   A good talk with a friend or counsellor is one way to alleviate the negativity.  Another is to do something you value.</p>\n<p>If you even take cutting your nails as an example.   Would a suicidal person be able to cut off the intense distress if they took 2 mins to cut their own nails ? Seriously.   Would one small task of humble domesticity break the awful thinking and give a window of opportunity to get away from such diabolical thoughts ?</p>\n<p>Adios, David.</p>\n<p>PS  Movies often use peer pressure to stop suicide.  There is a penchant for the line \"Then you'll have to kill me too\".    Thankfully most people don't want to harm another whilst they are contemplating harming themselves.  Why is this ? </p></div>", "date": "21-08-2013", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/29993", "content": "<p>Hi,</p>\n<p>I had recently read an article about the effect of death on a person's behaviour. Yes, it can have negative effects, but it can also make you aware of what is important. I have had that thought run through my head once or twice and it sent a shiver down my spine while turning my stomach.I am still young, so it is natural to be scared of death. I am not religious, but i do believe in God, so it comforts me a little. just take what you believe in and dedicate your life to it.</p></div>", "date": "13-09-2013", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/13663", "content": "Indeed ... interesting to read peoples responses here.  Since giving up religion I seem less afraid of Death, as the fear itself seems more taught than natural.  I now look at it as nothing more than a cycle with a limited number of events lefts that will inevitably lead to extinction and that being a cycle in it's self. <br>\n<br>\nI can identify with the emotions SAD mentions above when thinking on Mankind and the LIFE it lives on this planet.  I think the reality is that the frilly little dresses and down trodden ants of which they speak are a mixture that will see mankind's end as opposed to comforting oneself with the notion that life goes on.<br>\n<br>\nI mean not to be a buzz kill here ... after all I do suffer from severe depression as a result of what I see on a daily basis and of course the choices I make.  <br>\n<br>\nDeath  ... what does it mean to me?  I have had close family and friends Die.  I was hard to deal with and Life went from the happy families so often painted on the television screens to plastic families that aspire to the live the life so commonly sold via TV, Radio, Internet, Billboards, and so on ...  <br>\n<br>\nI guess everything became so trivial and meaningless ... Bit like when a child discovers what the real world can be like, but 10 fold when you begin to unlearn for a second time later in life.  It's a hole new problem in itself I guess ...<br>\n<br>\nSo in this light, I believe Death becomes less daunting and in fact for many a much long drawn out wait to escape the reality of which they live.  I'm not condoning opting at, but giving my perspective which unfortunately does not resonate with the positivity so many of us seek.<br>\n<br>\nI fear Life ... Not Death.  Of course I fear the act of Dieing .... but not so much the Door I see it to be.  Perhaps the unknown of where it may lead, but in that respect all I can think of is Nature and everything Man is not ... as the two together are a stark contrast.<br>\n<br>\nI like to believe somehow we are rehashed in some other part of the universe and in fact understand and marvel at how matter is so recycled and take heart in that alone.  What matters is finding what gives us balance and riding as best we can on that alone.  I can't take anymore in ... my vessel is pretty much done with Mans preaching of more and more ...<br>\n<br>\nI'm doing my best to simply enjoy what little is left ... For me, Death is simply the end of a very tough lesson and one in which I will take comfort that brings a sense of peace ... one way or the other.  <br>\n<br>\nAgain ... It's Life I am having trouble with ... but alas ... Understanding Death ... can help one with the other...  <br>\n<br>\nJust my 2 cents ... I like finding in by learning from the down trodden ant ... <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span><br>\n<br>\nTake care all.<br>\nDave</div>", "date": "18-09-2013", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/27686", "content": "<p>Hey</p>\n<p>I have existential death anxiety, and i will start to think about the end, the end of my life, the one thing that is basically certain. It is the worst thing, i will start thinking about it (Usually in bed or the shower or a time i get to think) and i will like shutdown, i start screaming, crying and jumping about. It doesn't stop. My heart starts racing, breathing gets heavy. I don't believe in the afterlife, But i do hope there is. Is there anyone with help for this. I would prefer if you have beaten it yourself because you understand the pain i go through.</p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 0.8125em; line-height: 1.38462;\">Yours Truly Facepalmdodger </span></p></div>", "date": "31-01-2015", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/39444", "content": "Only one part of you will be gone - the part that looks at things.  The part that takes actions it believes in is still very much alive, in the form of ideas spread to others while your body was alive.  When your daughter holds the door open for the person behind her, she is using your hand.  When the erstwhile drug addict you gave support to, helps another in turn, he is using your heart.  This part of you that watches things, routinely turns itself off anyway, such as when you have dreamless sleep.  So you should be used to it.  Every moment of the day, you are dead to a trillion trillion perspectives already.  When you are paying attention to the clock on the wall, you are not paying attention to the rice cooking on the stove.  You are dead to the stove.  You are dead to the cars outside.  You are dead to a leaf falling off a tree in China.  You are dead to the TV programme playing three houses over.  You are dead to the experience of making love to a woman in Spain right now.  You are dead to the university lecture on mathematics which is happening right now.  Are those death states scary?  Bodily death will just be one more.<br>\n<br>\nWhat will happen when you die?  What part in particular gives you the most anxiety?  Is it purely what awaits you on the other side that frightens you?  Is there something that you want to have done before you die?  Will something catastrophic happen to your family if you die?  I think these kinds of questions are what you should consider in getting to the root of why you have this anxiety.</div>", "date": "01-05-2015", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/13511", "content": "<p>To all the fellow sufferers of anxiety,</p>\n<p>Ever since I was a young child I have suffered from an extreme phobia of death. If I so much as think about it, I will have hot flushes and feel faint. My mind cannot fathom the thought of being here on earth, creating all of these loving relationships and then having it all erased.<span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\"> </span></p>\n<p><span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\">I'm not a religious person, so I don't have the comfort of saying to people 'see you on the other side' When for me, I have yet to </span><span style=\"line-height: 14px; font-size: 11px;\">experience</span><span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\"> any proof of this so called eternal life.</span></p>\n<p><span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\">I believe this fear is a large reason for my anxious and depressive personality. </span></p>\n<p><span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\">Does anybody have any feedback on there thoughts, feelings and fears of death.. I think I just need to talk about it.</span></p>\n<p><span style=\"line-height: 1.38462; font-size: 0.8125em;\">Hugs to all,</span></p>\n<p><span style=\"line-height: 14px; font-size: 11px;\">ChinUp.</span></p>\n<p><br>\n</p>\n<p><br>\n</p></div>", "date": "17-06-2013", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941" }, { "author": "user-id/39444", "content": "<p>I've never reaaally had a *fear* of death.  I could *conceive of* that fear creeping up on me as I get older, or if I develop some terminal illness, or if someone starts chasing me around with a knife all the time.  But for now I'm content to think that when I die, I won't actually be *able* to care that I'm dead.  I don't believe in an afterlife.<br>\n<br>\nMy survivors can mourn me in their own ways, remember me in their own ways, and then they, too, will die, and all evidence I was ever here (except tax records) will be gone.  And that will be fine, because I and my loved ones won't have intact brains, and won't have the ability to care.<br>\n<br>\nI did once worry a little when I was on a plane.  Not of death, per se.  I'm fine with planes, and I thought there was exactly 0% chance I would die on this one.  But I was reminded of the stereotype of people being afraid to fly, which got me thinking about death.  And then I got to thinking about this girl I was quite enamoured of, and I got quite sad at the fact that if I died, I'd no longer be able to talk to her.  And then I put in my earphones and rocked out to intense doom-metal/avant-garde/chamber/ambient stuff, to the touch- and sight-track of turbulence over the lightning-caressed midnight ocean.</p></div>", "date": "17-06-2013", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941" }, { "author": "user-id/7119", "content": " I think its natural to be frightened by your own demise. I believe in life after death(no religion) so I find comfort in that. I swing from being frightened to the extreme that you described and inviting death. I think inviting death is an unnatural state of mind. So I think you being frightened is probably healthy. Think about all the time you have wasted on worrying and thinking about death, when you could be using that time living and enjoying the time you have.</div>", "date": "17-06-2013", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941" }, { "author": "user-id/5860", "content": "<p>Thanks ChinUp for reaching out to this community for help. I am an atheist with depression, stress, anxiety, and rage. I try every day to look at the world in a rational way. I frequently fail. When I fail, I try to find the humour in the absurd lack of rational thinking. I often fail at this too, but every bit helps get me through the day. Hence my name Facetious. </p>\n<p>You have provided a good foundation of context which we can use to converse, however I have insufficient information to answer your question. Can you please provide between 1 sentence and 2 short paragraphs, each, on what you think/believe/predict happens to a person when they die, and how you predict you will react when someone you know dies?</p>\n<p>If you don't respond, I hope considering how you might answer these questions has been therapeutic. </p></div>", "date": "18-06-2013", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941" }, { "author": "user-id/39444", "content": "<p>It may be of some comfort to consider the holistic view that, even though *you're* dead, your \"faction\" - the universe - keeps going.  Babies will continue to be born, cry for their mothers, eat pureed gingerbread (is that a thing babies do?), swing on swings and in jazz halls.  Ladies will continue to wear frilly dresses while riding around the city malls on their great danes.  Rabbits will continue to bounce around, keeping the ant people downtrodden.  The wind will blow, the sun will shine, and most things will be just sublime.  And even when the sun finally throws it in and goes to that great vacuum in the meta-sky, the rest of the billions of stars will continue on, flickering mockingly.  \"Ha, ha, you're dead\" they will say in the celestial version of morse code, probably.</p></div>", "date": "25-06-2013", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941" }, { "author": "user-id/40356", "content": "<p>I am exactly the same!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1</p>\n<p>Ever since I was very little I would get very upset and worry that the people I love, I might never see again.I am working through all that at the moment as its at the core of my anxiety. I dont have a set religion my have started exploring all types of views and belifes which helps me allot. So i suggest to you(apart from speaking to someone who knows how to treat phobias) start researching other religions all kinds...</p>\n<p>xxx</p></div>", "date": "02-07-2013", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941" }, { "author": "user-id/21739", "content": "<p>Dear Chin Up,</p>\n<p>Keep your chin up.    One of the reasons seems to be that death, any kind of death related to your friends or family, is an echo of other deaths.  So, sometimes we feel it stronger.  Or we a true Aussies and say \"Lucky bastard\" !</p>\n<p>Why worry about something we have very little control over like death.  Maybe life is worth a go sometimes too ?  Unless your a matyr or suicidal bomber.</p>\n<p>I loved Rodentdron's comment - even though you're dead the universe keeps going, bouncy rabbits and down trodden ants and all.  Maybe the real fear of death is that some nasty people who have controlled others all their lives still seem to exert an undue influence.  But then Christians use the positive spin of this when they ask \"What would Jesus have done ?\" in tricky situations like discovering that the barnyard building in Armish Communities could have been done before the storm if electric tools had been used or even when running out of toilet paper after a particularly fierce Indian Hot Curry.</p>\n<p>Adios, David.</p></div>", "date": "03-07-2013", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941" }, { "author": "user-id/39211", "content": "<p>Hey, </p>\n<p><br>\n</p>\n<p>I have felt the same way since I was first introduced to the idea of death. It was worse when I was younger, I would think about it and it didnt matter where I was it would bring me to tears, thinking that I wouldnt exist anymore, or that I wouldnt be able to breath or think, If i thought about it at night I wouldnt be able to sleep because I would lay there and make sure that I was still breathing. </p>\n<p>Now that Im a little older it still scares me, but as I have way to many other things that trigger my anxiety I try not to think about, I'm the same with not being religious, but it doesnt stop me from secretly hoping that all of it is true and that there is an afterlife, which if there isnt it is true, we wont exist so we wont be able to care about it. I think when your younger its harder to accept death, for me (being 18) I think about all the stuff I havnt done yet and all the people that I love thta i would leave behind, but as you get older you get to complete all those things you want to do in life, and the thought of dealth will get easier, as long as you life a fulfilling life you should have no reason to fear death. </p>\n<p>One thing I have done that Has helped is I made a bucket list, of all the stupid and fun shit I want to do with my life before I die, as far as im concerned these days im not going to die until after I complete every single thing on my list. </p>\n<p><br>\n</p>\n<p>best thing to do is to try not to think about it and to be more concerned about living each day to the best that you can, and to take every opportunity you get, no matter how crazy it may be!!  </p></div>", "date": "09-07-2013", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941" }, { "author": "user-id/38637", "content": "<p>Hey Peoples... </p>\n<p>Couple of years ago I had throat surgery ...anyway couple weeks later woke up at 4 am thinking I was dribbling saliva...wiped my mouth....and rolled over....anyway felt it again..wiped it again then decided to turn light on.....pillows and sheets covered in blood...terrified I rang the ambulance..they took me to emergency...they managed to stop it....but it came back....they left me sitting there bleeding. I felt it  going down to the back of my throat but the nurses said....no just as long as you lean forward. Two hours later I was rushed into resus...and then surgery. I remember feeling this was it ....I was a on my way out.    Since then ...... contemplated death a lot and as I am not overly religious ....and I am the same ..... hate the idea that when lights out...there is nothing.   Some how though... I look at nature...the amazing world...space....the wonders we surround ....and the love......makes me think...ahhh nah there is something more..... </p></div>", "date": "15-07-2013", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941" }, { "author": "user-id/31408", "content": "Hi everyone,it's nice to read what everyone else is going through,i wont bore you with all my details but want to share a little bit of what im going through hoping it will help,my anxiety started about 20 odd years ago with panic attacks after a disasterous relationship,the panic attacks subsided but left me with anxiety and the fear that something is about to happen that will end my life,some days are good some not.It can be something like a pain in my jaw like a toothache and my brain goes into overdrive that i'm going to die and then it takes a long time to for me to quiet my brain down that nothing is wrong.I have an appointment with a doctor next week as I realy don't want to go through another 20 years of this,i'm lucky in a sense as i'm not as bad as it used to be,anyway it's nice to talk,my wife is very supportive but I hope it helps me to talk to fellow sufferers,thanks for listening.</div>", "date": "16-07-2013", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/scared-to-death-of-death/td-p/56941" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48704", "content": "<p>At my current job I have been thrown into the deep end doing two full time roles as one person. The stress is getting to me and I have been getting extreme anxiety. I have expressed to my manager/management that it’s too much and they just say oh it will get better in time. But it hasn’t. The branch manger is very hard to approach on the best of days he is very good at making you feel lesser and belittling you. On several occasions he has called me a sook for not feeling well and that has only made me feel worse about myself. I try to push through my feelings but I can’t ignore them anymore. I have been looking for different work to get me out of this male dominated industry (my boss is 60 and thinks even if you are sick you should be at work) he is always swearing at all the other staff members and is extremely proud of how many people have quit because of him. How do I return to work after being sick and not let his comments affect me? </p></div>", "date": "22-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/work-stress-and-work-bullying-from-management/td-p/572941" }, { "author": "user-id/46594", "content": "<p>Wow </p><p>that is sounding reallly tough and horrible </p><p>is there no HR equivalent you can access at your job? <br>I would just continue looking for another job and that would make me strong enough to ignore all the jabs or comments. <br>sounds like they need you more than you need them at this point so I would start slacking off as well, what are they going to do fire you? Not likely </p><p> </p><p>best of luck I hope you get some support or help with it soon</p><p> </p><p>wag x </p></div>", "date": "22-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/work-stress-and-work-bullying-from-management/td-p/572941" }, { "author": "user-id/48704", "content": "<p>I do have this fear of me going back in after if being sick and then saying pack your shit and leave. Tbh if it did happen it would give me the opportunity to take them to fair work. We do have HR but so many other people have complained about him from yelling at them and swearing at them and he is still here. Honestly it’s just an endless cycle of fear. Walking on eggshells. <br><br></p><p>thank you for your kind words, they do mean a lot to me! <br><br></p><p>x</p></div>", "date": "23-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/work-stress-and-work-bullying-from-management/td-p/572941" }, { "author": "user-id/43559", "content": "<p>Have you reported to work safe they can assist you with a workplace bullying claim takes bout a month if they agree that your case is strongly which looks like it is as your mental health is struggling, or as per above use up ur sick leave and whist your doing it look for another job and quit . </p></div>", "date": "23-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/work-stress-and-work-bullying-from-management/td-p/572941" }, { "author": "user-id/40334", "content": "<p>Hi Worriedatwork</p><p> </p><p>That's an absolutely horrible situation to be in. From what you say, they've been more than happy to put you under an enormous amount of stress and have a highly questionable level of sanity. When it comes to that manager, tell me how sane it is that someone is actually <em>proud</em> of how abusive and mentally destructive they are. How sane is it to label someone who's unwell as a sook? Personally, I'd label someone as unwell and needing time off work for their body to be able to bounce back to peak performance. A sane manager would want peak performance out of their employees. They'd encourage it. How sane is it to put one of your top performers under so much pressure that you end up losing them, driving them out of the job? Keep in mind, any boss who says 'Back in my day we were tougher'. You gotta question what 'tougher' means to some people. Back in the day, some trade apprentices were beaten or injured as some insane right of passage and if they cried they were deemed 'weak'. <em>These days</em> a lot of that behaviour is illegal and thank goodness.</p><p> </p><p>I think it's extra tough if we've been conditioned to be someone who doesn't rock the boat too much or someone who aims to please. We can work harder than ever before, under <em>intolerable</em> amounts of stress, 'til we break or finally leave. We can take a poop load of psychological abuse that's deemed okay by some, until we just can't take it anymore. Sometimes it's only through a breakdown that we start to <em>break down</em> all the abuse in the <em>lead up</em> to breaking point. In a lot of ways we're tougher than what people give us credit for. We can take a lot more than those who may put us under stress (those who don't want the stress, so they give it to us in some way, to lighten <em>their</em> load). We can take a lot more than insensitive abusive arrogant people, who like to shut confrontation down so they don't have to cop too much of it or so they don't have to be reasonable, providing good reason. There's skill in being a reasonable person. No skill in being unreasonable.</p><p> </p><p>In the lead up to finding a different job perhaps you could flip the script regarding your manager. Instead of seeing him as the tough one who's managing things, you could perhaps see him as the insane one who's <em>mis</em>managing. Next time you meet with him, consider thinking 'This man is insane and proof of that will be based on what comes out of his mouth'. So, when he says something highly questionable, you can be thinking 'THERE'S PROOF!'. If he adds to what he's said with something else, you could then think 'This man has completely lost his mind'. Smile in a knowing way, when you think this. That smile will tend to torment him, for he will have to know <em>why</em> you're smiling when he speaks. While <em>he</em> thinks he's tough and someone to be feared, <em>you</em> will know the truth...this man is not in his right mind.</p><p> </p></div>", "date": "23-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/work-stress-and-work-bullying-from-management/td-p/572941" }, { "author": "user-id/48214", "content": "<p>Hi Worriedatwork, </p><p> </p><p>Oh gosh, that sounds like a really horrible situation. How you are being treated is so wrong and very cruel. Sounds like your health is suffering because of it. Unfortunately, people like this rarely change. And the workplace culture is unlikely to change whilst he is the boss. That is tough to be away sick and then have to go back and face the abuse again. It's just not on. I am guessing that being under that much stress would probably make you sick again, and again, and again.  </p><p> </p><p>I hope it is okay to share a similar experience I had in a workplace.... I took over from someone who had worked in the company for 20+ years and had built quite an impressive service. When I stepped in, it was like taking on two full-time roles and I was only working part-time. I quickly became overwhelmed, sick, stressed, anxious, and at times panicky. I tried to address the work overload with the big boss. I showed them my Outlook calendar with the tasks squeezed in for each day. And compared it to the list of tasks I was expected to do. And showed how I couldn't possibly fit it all in with the time I had. That helped a bit -  I was able to offload some of the tasks to others, and it helped me to prioritise the most important stuff and let the other stuff go. BUT the expectation was already there amongst all the staff that I would do ALL these things, like my predecessor. And it looked like I was slack when things got passed off to other people.</p><p> </p><p>To make it worse, my immediate boss was targeting me right from the beginning - storming into my office and reprimanding me for doing things that were actually by job! I was on edge ALL THE TIME - treading on eggshells. I thought it might be just a settling in thing, but it continued. I raised it with the big boss and apparently he spoke to my boss. But it kind of made things worse. I realised that this person was not going to change, and I would always feel anxious and stressed in that role. So after 6 months of trying to make it work, I left. I was a nervous wreck and heading for a breakdown. I had to put my health first. I realised that sometimes, you just have to walk away from something or someone that is harmful to you. </p><p> </p><p>therising - I can relate to your comment about having a <em>breakdown</em> in order to <em>break down</em> the abuse that led to the breakdown in the first place. Shortly after I left that workplace I did indeed have a breakdown. I also think it takes a breakdown to <em>break through.</em></p><p> </p><p>Worriedatwork - I wish you all the best for finding a way to break through it, </p><p>dig</p></div>", "date": "23-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/work-stress-and-work-bullying-from-management/td-p/572941" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48702", "content": "<p>Hi all </p><p>Im 20 yrs old and this past year or so I have been feeling overly anxious around my mates. Sometimes I spend days leading upto events just trying to control my emotions which then interrupts my work cause I can’t think straight. At the events or gathering sometimes I feel really anxious so I don’t really speak and then I start feeling overwhelmed and more anxious and feels like I’m in a spotlight. I’m so grateful for all the people around me and I would hate to lose relationships because of this but sometimes it feels like I just can’t help it , I could not show up but I feel like a coward. Just needed to share this to get it off my chest and I hope someone can benefit from this message </p><p>thank you wish you all the best</p><p> </p></div>", "date": "22-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/social-anxiety/td-p/572921" }, { "author": "user-id/3729", "content": "Dear 123hank <br>\n I’m Sophie from the Beyond Blue Forums<br>\nThank you for your post. We can hear that you are really struggling, and we want to let you know that the Beyond Blue Support Service is here for you. If you’d like to talk through any of this with our team, we invite you to call or chat to one of our trained mental health professionals; it’s completely confidential and available 24/7. You can contact Beyond Blue either via phone on 1300 22 4636 or via our Webchat service at the following link: <a href=\"https://www.beyondblue.org.au/support-service/chat\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://www.beyondblue.org.au/support-service/chat</a><br>\n <br>\nWarm Regards, and please keep safe.<br>\n <br>\nSophie_M<br>\n </div>", "date": "22-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/social-anxiety/td-p/572921" }, { "author": "user-id/43395", "content": "<p>Hello 123hank - what you're going through sounds really tough, and I just wished to acknowledge your being proactive in challenging what's happening, by adding to this forum and sharing your story.  The way that you acknowledge 'all the people around me', suggests how much you value those individuals/groups/mates - would you be able to share with someone you are closest to what happens when you encounter this anxiety?</p></div>", "date": "23-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/social-anxiety/td-p/572921" }, { "author": "user-id/48702", "content": "<p>Hi LVB</p><p>i appreciate the reply and I think I’m gonna try and see a therapist/counsellor so I can get it off my chest and start to feel better thank you <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":folded_hands:\">🙏</span> </p></div>", "date": "23-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/social-anxiety/td-p/572921" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48690", "content": "<p>I don't know what I'm doing anymore. I'm nearing my thirties, still in uni and getting so burned out and I just want it all to stop. I'm so incredibly useless when I've got all this support from family and I'm doing nothing with it and I can't help anyone. I don't even want to listen to anyone's problems anymore because then it affects me mentally and it just takes a toll on me, but at the same time I can't stop them because then they'll have a mental breakdown because they won't be able to vent and they've shouldered so much burden I just can't stop this vicious cycle. Paying for a psych/counselling is also so fucking expensive in this economy even with a mental health plan that I have to fight every fucking doctor for, but at the same time I'm not living in the streets or even in a tragic family situation besides traumatises immigrant parents, I hate that I am an emotional anxious ridden prison.</p><p> </p><p>Why can't I just talk or do things without thinking so critically of myself and others all the time. Why do care so much but don't care at the same time. I care enough to find the words to comfort people in the moment but I don't want to talk to anyone ever after that, I won't initiate conversations or even say hello. I just hate that social cycle, I'm not built for it or I just have no patience for it. I'm so fucked in the head. </p><p> </p><p>It doesn't help that I'm someone with basically no social skills, nonexistent work experience because I've basically isolated myself up until now. I hate that I can't function on my own at all and I'm berating myself for bitching about it cause other people are having it worse and I'm just being a little shit that can't face mild adversity of simply trying and accepting failures. </p><p> </p><p>Except I'm not 18 anymore failures mean I can't pay bills, I drop out and have nothing to show for it, I leave my family I love an care about in distress. I'm so stuck and so tired of this shit. What do I do, what do I even want to do I don't even fucking know anymore.</p></div>", "date": "21-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/sick-and-tired-of-anxieties/td-p/572873" }, { "author": "user-id/46594", "content": "<p>Hi Tired</p><p>I just wanted to say I read the title of</p><p>your post and really related to it! <br>I hope things get better for you soon, my GP was very good with getting my mental health plan together so have been very lucky like that- and it seems unusual based on what I read around forums like these. <br>The cost of professional help is outrageous I agree, but so worth it in my opinion so please don’t give up. <br><br></p><p>Stay strong, keep posting here if you need to vent! <br>We are all in it together</p><p> </p><p>wag x </p></div>", "date": "22-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/sick-and-tired-of-anxieties/td-p/572873" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/13301", "content": "<p>As the title says I am going on my first trip on my own and it will be overseas. I have never been overseas before so I am quite frankly shitting myself. I have so much to think about before I go such as getting myself familiar with my flights, what to pack, what i cant take, what bag/s to buy, etc.  I will be going on a tour so activities and making friends will be done through this tour group.</p><p> </p><p>Has anyone else been overseas on their own and how did you cope? I could use people advice and tips and how they managed to prepared for their trip. There are so many websites out there that I don't know where to start</p><p> </p><p>I also feel pressure to travel as I am in my late twenties and that it will be harder to do when older </p></div>", "date": "04-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/going-on-my-first-trip-overseas-and-also-on-my-own-help-me/td-p/571702" }, { "author": "user-id/13121", "content": "<p>Hello Dear Losttwentysomething,</p><p> </p><p>I hope you really enjoy your trip overseas…I think a good idea is to research your flight plan, accommodations you will be staying in, the local weather forecast of where your visiting, which might help you to know what clothes to pack for your trip…I think it’s also a good idea to check out the countries rules about dress code etc…..</p><p> </p><p>Not sure if I’ve helped at all..I have never been out of Australia…but one thing I do know is….That you should never feel pressured into doing something that you don’t really want to do….</p><p> </p><p>My kindest thoughts Dear Losttwentysomething….</p><p>Grandy..</p></div>", "date": "06-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/going-on-my-first-trip-overseas-and-also-on-my-own-help-me/td-p/571702" }, { "author": "user-id/15745", "content": "<p>Hi! It’s great that you’re going on an overseas trip! I hope it goes well! <br><br></p><p>I went traveling on my own for two months and there were a couple of things I found really helpful.</p><p> </p><p>The first was to bring with me the printed out itinerary for my trip and to research how to get to my hostels/hotels once I arrived in a city.<br><br></p><p>Another really good thing to look at and keep on you at all times is who you can contact if an emergency comes up. This can include emergency contacts back in Australia, local emergency contacts and the embassy contacts and locations in the countries you’re visiting. It’s also a good idea to keep an eye on local news and check the smart traveller website as you go.</p><p> </p><p>Third is to keep a few hundred dollars in cash on you at all times in a location different to your wallet. This can come in handy if you lose your wallet or phone.</p><p> </p><p>Depending on where you’re going, there may be different ways that theft can occur, so it might be helpful to look up some of the common ways theft can occur for tourists in the places you’ll visit and ways you can avoid them.</p><p> </p><p>If you’re going to a non-English speaking country or countries, it can be helpful to have a list on your phone or a booklet of commonly used phrases like ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ with the pronunciations.</p><p> </p><p>Always brings snacks and a water bottle with you, check out what medication you can bring to another country if you have any or if there are any requirements and make sure you get vaccinations for specific diseases to the country you’re visiting if you need it.</p><p> </p><p>I’m sure you’ll have an amazing time! Good luck!!</p></div>", "date": "13-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/going-on-my-first-trip-overseas-and-also-on-my-own-help-me/td-p/571702" }, { "author": "user-id/48699", "content": "<p>Yeah - I hear you. I put off going overseas for ages because I wasn't keen on doing it on my own. Eventually I took the plunge and did it - went on my own with a tour group and it was fantastic. Like you I was very nervous before hand but seriously it was so good! You won't regret it. If you're on your own going with a tour group is the way to go. You'll have a great time. I know I did and wondered why I left it for so long. Go for it and have a great time.</p></div>", "date": "22-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/going-on-my-first-trip-overseas-and-also-on-my-own-help-me/td-p/571702" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/24373", "content": "<p>I made a mistake at work 2 days a go.</p><p>I'm due back at work in 2 days time.</p><p>I may have sent something containing sensitive information incorrectly.</p><p>Is it a dismissals offense, no?</p><p>At worst, it gets lost in the mail and there's no tracking of it or it falls into the wrong hands.</p><p>I've been sick all weekend. I even took an antidepressant I haven't taken in over a year and it's heightened my paranoia and made me nauseous.</p><p>I feel like I've burned a bridge with my direct manager when I was open about how a coworker made me feel. Her approach was that I needed to help myself my self-regulating my emotions and that I was a valued employee and yo carry on with what I'm doing with more positivity.</p><p>Of course, my only take away from that I'd that I'm too emotional, overreacting and dramatic.</p><p>Part of me wants to address the issue tomorrow, the only part just hopes the mail reaches where it's meant to go and I don't have to think about it again.</p><p>But right now...that's all I'm doing thinking of all the could've/would've/should've. I've cancelled plans to go out, I've thrown up, passed out....I know people have made worse mistakes. I know I'm not the most incompetent person on the planet. I know I'm a good person who trues hard and like to help anyone. But once that Self Critic in my head gets feed, I'm trapped in a war with myself. Even if I do get called in and reprimanded - nothing they can say is worse than what's being said in my headrighg now. I just want to rest and cut myself some slack but the self loathing is relentless. I have booked an appt with a psycologist I was seeing post surgery a couple years back but that's not till Sept 4th. On top of all that, we're juggling family issues regarding the appropriate care for elder members in our family. It's just a lot, all at once. And I can't wind down. No mindfulness apps are working. I'm just you wired in panic mode. I hate that I've come as far as I have come...and still recognize the downward spiral. And I'm spiraling....</p><p> </p></div>", "date": "20-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/work-anxiety/td-p/572764" }, { "author": "user-id/43559", "content": "<p>Hi apollonia</p><p> </p><p>its very hard to say it depends what was in the sensitive email u sent , it depends , it sounds like you are having issues at work Re a coworker &amp; your feelings have been affected, it seems from what you’ve written you have approached your manager for help and they have brushed you off telling you its your fault for having hurt feelings ( this is not right by the way , your allowed to have feelings @ work and address them especially if you’re having issues with a co worker) have you tried going for a walk? sometimes this can help with the panic your experiencing , try calling beyond blue they can give u brief counseling as well. It sounds like your work values you as they say so in what you have written but want you to feel nothing if your feelings are hurt at work by co worker? It’s certainly like they are saying put up &amp; shut up we won’t help u with this co worker, I’ve had this too it’s not helpful to your mental health at all to be dismissed like this , go to your Gp if you have some sick leave use it , if your being bullied ect at work report it to HR &amp; work safe , honestly it’s not worth putting up with it just for a job there are more supportive jobs around than ones that don’t value the employee feeling &amp; want them to be emotionally robots which is very hard to do let alone maintain. </p></div>", "date": "21-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/work-anxiety/td-p/572764" }, { "author": "user-id/19707", "content": "<p>Hi, welcome</p><p> </p><p>When older (I'm 67yo) you look back on the mistakes you made and realise- yep, they were normal for me being an emotional sensitive person. The same errors would not be made by people that were less so, were more astute and clever etc. But, they were not me, I'm unique like you and the mistakes I made were made by me. It makes me feel now that I compared myself with everyone else and that isnt fair to myself.</p><p> </p><p>The concept that \"what's done is done\" is only wasted is we dont learn from it and accept the consequences of our errors. If it means you will lose your job then accepting the worse case senario can actually help. In one job I had in security I left out a document that was suppose to be left in a safe, I did the same and worried but luckily the guard that took over from me put it in the safe and didnt tell anyone. He said \"we all make mistakes\" and proceeded to tell me some of the errors he'd made, much worse than mine.</p><p> </p><p>I hope you feel a little better and remember if you dont make mistakes you cant be human.</p><p> </p><p>TonyWK</p></div>", "date": "21-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/work-anxiety/td-p/572764" }, { "author": "user-id/2579", "content": "<p>So it sounds like you inserted the wrong address (and recipient?) on a confidential letter.<br>I know in emails that there is usually a disclaimer advising if what has been sent is not directed at the individual, then they are to disregard it.<br>Most people are pretty decent and will return (or throw out) the errant letter without a second thought - it happens, and it's just an admin oversight.<br>But you are tearing yourself up about it, so I would encourage you to clear your conscience and make reparations by contacting your boss without delay. Whatever transpires from there is out of your hands but at least you will have passed the worrying (if any) onto those in charge.<br>Think carefully about what took place so you can make an accurate account - know the facts before you act - and give yourself some credit for doing the right thing.</p></div>", "date": "21-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/work-anxiety/td-p/572764" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48626", "content": "<p>Hi there, </p><p>my anxiety is spiraling, in the past few days I am struggling to get through daily tasks, I’ve had a medication change and the side effects feel like they are making my anxiety worse, I suffer from health anxiety and it’s being amplified at the moment, my stomach is so sour and I feel so nauseous all I want to do is lay in bed, has anyone else experienced this? What did you do/eat to help?</p></div>", "date": "15-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/sour-stomach/td-p/572464" }, { "author": "user-id/46594", "content": "<p>I’m sorry to hear you were feeling like this, did things manage to get a bit better through the week? <br>I hope so, </p><p> </p><p>wag x</p></div>", "date": "18-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/sour-stomach/td-p/572464" }, { "author": "user-id/48626", "content": "<p>It did thankfully,my stomach has calmed and my anxiety has as well, not better but definitely on the mend. Thank you for asking <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":smiling_face_with_smiling_eyes:\">😊</span></p></div>", "date": "19-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/sour-stomach/td-p/572464" }, { "author": "user-id/38654", "content": "<p>hi there,</p><p> </p><p>anxiety can definitely manifest in physical ways. i often feel sick, have shortness of breath, and have headaches if I have anxiety. this is usually one of the tell tale signs that i know it's anxiety.  it's no fun, i am sorry you are experiencing that.</p><p> </p><p>usually i wait until it passes, and work on my strategies to help that. when im feeling better i will resume normal activities. if its not getting better, i would see your doctor about it.</p><p> </p><p>i hope it improves soon,</p><p>jaz xx</p></div>", "date": "21-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/sour-stomach/td-p/572464" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48737", "content": "<p>Morning guys,</p><p> </p><p>I am still fairly new to the site, so I haven't read all relevant posts yet<span> </span></p><div class=\"\"> </div><p> </p><p> </p><p>I have had nerves/anxiety since my parents split when I was around 7 (40 years), and bouts of severe anxiety for the last 29 years. No matter how many therapists/psychologists/psychiatrists or medications I have tried over this time, I still get bouts (sometimes months) of paralysing physical anxiety whether my thoughts are negative or fearful or if my day is going fine.</p><p> </p><p>I have had to take an extended amount of time out of the workforce since the end of May as I had just hit rock bottom with this issue (and less often, bouts of depression) and to work on coming off the 2 substances I medicated myself with just to get some relief from the crippling symptoms and seek further help for it all.</p><p> </p><p>I would SO appreciate hearing other people's stories and suggestions for turning off the seemingly constant fight/flight response that is setting off in my brain.</p><p> </p><p>Thanks heaps and have a great day.</p></div>", "date": "31-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/paralysing-anxiety/td-p/573480" }, { "author": "user-id/48805", "content": "<p>Hi Maisy, I just wanted to come forward and congratulate you on being brave enough to post such a personal piece of yourself on here. This is a safe space where you are able to come forth and seek guidance and help.  In regulates to your anxiety trouble/fight or flight response, I too also feel this way sometimes about the most normal things or I get inside my own head and find I overwork my brain to much to the point it gets all tired out. I find that sometimes I need to let all my emotions out and have a good cry in the pillow and then zen out with some burning essential oils and a nice peaceful environment like outside or in home, with calm music or even and audiobook. Medications are hard for me as I always forget to take them which isn’t but I have other ways of helping myself. <br><br></p><p>please feel free to write back </p><p> </p><p>thank you for reading xoxox </p></div>", "date": "31-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/paralysing-anxiety/td-p/573480" }, { "author": "user-id/48737", "content": "<p>Thanks so much for your response. I tend to cry a lot when I have bouts of depression, but not when I am anxious. It certainly does help with letting the depression out! My brain goes into hyper-drive trying to assign reason for the anxiety and it can spiral out of control, so sometimes I just have to accept it and not over-think it I guess. I'd love to know of the other ways you help yourself. I have an essential oil diffuser and it is pleasant, but doesn't really calm me down <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":disappointed_face:\">😞</span></p><p> </p><p>I hope you have a fab day xo</p></div>", "date": "01-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/paralysing-anxiety/td-p/573480" }, { "author": "user-id/48202", "content": "<p>Dear Maisy Nina,</p><p>I'm so sorry to hear about your anxiety that has lasted for so many years. You must have been devestated when your parents split up and you were such a little girl.</p><p>My parents split up when I was very young too and I hardly saw my dad, who I missed so much. I married young and tried to cling on to my partner but we eventually split up.</p><p>I struggled with depression and anxiety for many years until I began meditation. I meditate three times a day for fifteen minutes. I never miss and the result has been much greater emotional strength. Although I still have bouts if anxiety, I am able to handle them more easily and find occasiinal counselling beneficial too.</p><p>While I realise that meditation isn't for everyone, I also kept a list of activities I could do when feeling particlarly anxious e.g. deep breathing, going for a walk, dancing to my favourite music, having a warm bath etc.</p><ol><li>Maisy Nina, such a beautiful name, you were not guilty for your parents' separation and you richly deserve happiness in your life. I hope some of my suggestions have been helpful but above all, I urge you to talk to a counsellor initially.</li></ol><p>I look forward to hearing from you. We are all here to support you and encourage your happiness.</p><p>Please take care of yourself.</p><p>Ruchju xxxx</p><p> </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "01-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/paralysing-anxiety/td-p/573480" }, { "author": "user-id/48737", "content": "<p>Hi Ruchju,</p><p> </p><p>Thanks so much for your supportive and kind message, it means a lot to just be heard and understood. My family don't understand the crippling feature of prolonged anxiety. I ended up going to a 13 day residential/medical detox earlier this month to come off the substances I was abusing to numb the anxiety and depression, and I haven't been having it as often, thank the Lord!! But I just still feel like it is bubbling away under the surface, waiting for a time to catch me off guard. I have deliberately increased my exercise to a brisk walk each day, no matter if it is 10min or an hour, this is something I neglected whilst an addict (although I still somehow managed to work until I left because I was in a bad way all around). I am really enjoying getting fitter again and I am hoping that it will also work as a kind of anxiety prevention tool i.e. feeling more calm and hopefully delaying any anxiety onset, or avoiding it all together, now that would be a miracle!!</p><p> </p><p>I'm sorry about your parents too, it must have been hard, especially not seeing your Dad. Even though they don't truly understand, mine try I guess.</p><p> </p><p>Thanks again and I look forward to talking with you again.</p><p> </p></div>", "date": "02-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/paralysing-anxiety/td-p/573480" }, { "author": "user-id/48202", "content": "<p>Dear Maisy Nina,</p><p>Thank you so much for your reply. It's so good to know you are trying so hard to overcome your anxiety. The more you try, the stronger you'll become!</p><p>Please learn to love yourself. When depressed or anxious, I used to relive my mistakes but now I try to think about my successes and there are plenty of them. Giving up an addiction is a huge success for a start. Disciplining yourself to walk is another and I'm sure there are plenty more.</p><p>Keep going Maisy Nina and strive to realise just what a wonderful person you are.</p><p>All best wishes,</p><p>Ruchju xxx</p></div>", "date": "03-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/paralysing-anxiety/td-p/573480" }, { "author": "user-id/48737", "content": "<p>Hi Richju!</p><p> </p><p>Thanks for your kind words. They are much appreciated. Good advice about successes too.</p><p>I wish for you a wonderful and peace-filled day ahead <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":beaming_face_with_smiling_eyes:\">😁</span> xo</p></div>", "date": "03-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/paralysing-anxiety/td-p/573480" }, { "author": "user-id/48214", "content": "<p>Hello Maisy Nina, </p><p> </p><p>What lovely kind responses you have received in this discussion thread. I hope it has been helpful for you <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span></p><p> </p><p>I just want to say how brave that was to do the medical detox - you are amazing. I imagine that removing the substances has meant that the feelings you feel are more intense when they come up? And perhaps that feels scary to feel such intense emotions? I can relate a little bit to that. I know that I was using alcohol to numb my intense feelings of anxiety a while ago. And then I had to stop because alcohol clashes with a new medication that I started to take for sleep. And I noticed that once I had removed alcohol, my feelings were so intense and I had to actually feel my feelings. It was so horrible. But I realised that I couldn't keep pushing down my feelings forever and at some point I just had to feel it. </p><p> </p><p>It sounds like you have tried many avenues to get help for the anxiety, over many years. Sometimes when therapy and medications don't help with anxiety, there might be something deeper going on. I know we are not supposed to diagnose or give \"advice\" on here. But, it might be something to explore..... </p><p> </p><p>I noticed you used the phrase \"paralysing anxiety\" in your title. It made me think of Peter Levine's books, \"Healing Trauma\" and \"Waking the Tiger\". He talks a lot about when the energy of fight/flight gets stuck in the body and can't be discharged. It's part of the \"freeze\" response to a threat. He calls it the immobility or paralysing response.  </p><p> </p><p>Anyway, for me, managing my anxiety on an ongoing basis includes: daily meditation for about 15 to 20 minutes, just listening to an audio on Insight Timer or Spotify. Also mindfulness and grounding to stay in the present moment, noticing what I can see, hear, feel, touch. Getting out of the head and into the body is so important, so moving, exercising, dancing around to music is great. I also love calming things like yoga. But, if the energy feels stuck, then I do things like scream in the car or underwater, shaking my arms and legs, a short sprint along the beach - things to help get the energy out.</p><p> </p><p>I hope that is of some help to you, or to someone else reading. </p><p>dig</p><p> </p></div>", "date": "04-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/paralysing-anxiety/td-p/573480" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48819", "content": "<p>Hi everyone, first time poster here. I’m 6 months into my first job out of uni and I’m really struggling with anxiety and depression at the moment with this job.</p><p> </p><p>I dread going into work everyday because I am so anxious about the amount of tasks and responsibility I have. I am making a lot of mistakes because I’m thrown in the deep end a lot - my degree isn’t related to my role and it’s hard to get help from my coworkers because they are all so busy. I also find it so hard to connect with them because I am the youngest in my team and I don’t really know what to talk about with them. Due to my lack of knowledge I also find myself working extra hours just to understand more and keep up.</p><p> </p><p>As well I put a lot of pressure on myself to do well and I am a big people pleaser. I think I have a lot of performance anxiety after seeking a lot of academic validation my whole life. It also has me questioning my role as I don’t think it’s very well suited to my personality at all, I am in meetings all day and have to reach out to so many different people across the business who don’t prioritise me because I’m a grad, and I am super shy and introverted. For example I cried for hours after work today of stress because a higher up expects a project to be done by end of September, but I incorrectly gave later dates to another team which is causing delays in the project and I’ve been beating around the bush with her because I’m scared to tell her it’ll be delayed. </p><p> </p><p>I am seeing a therapist and try to enjoy myself outside of work but it’s hard when I have an 1hr+ commute and feel so burnt out when I get home. I also work casual shifts in retail on the weekends sometimes to save money so I don’t get much time to myself. While I feel very lucky because I am the first in my family to even go to uni and have a corporate job, I feel so out of depth at work and like I don’t fit in. I feel like I’ve wasted all my studying, money and time spent on my degree to not like my career path. It has even made me consider going back to uni for further study in a different field because I don’t like my role at all. And I become so jealous of other grads who found their perfect role out of uni or at the least tolerate their job while I am barely surviving. </p><p> </p><p>Thankfully I’m in a grad program and I am rotating out of this team in 6 months so I do see a light at the end of the tunnel but I don’t know if I can take it until then. I know 100% I’ll be trying to move jobs or go back to uni after my program ends because this role and company are making me miserable.</p><p> </p><p>Hoping there are people who can just listen and understand…</p></div>", "date": "01-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/new-grad-and-work-anxiety/td-p/573593" }, { "author": "user-id/14386", "content": "<p>hello and welcome,</p><p> </p><p>It sounds like you are immense pressure and anxiety in navigating this new job. That transition from school to work can be incredibly jarring. You said that you are a people pleaser (like myself) and perhaps perfectionism will make you think that any small mistake is a reflection on you and your worth. So ... the fact this business employed you would indicate you have the skills and talents needed. Please don't be so hard on yourself - you're doing the best you can in difficult circumstances.</p><p> </p><p>I would also commend you for talking this through with a therapist. And I am sure that talking with them you might be able to find a way forward. </p><p> </p><p>On the flip side, if this is not the role for you in the long-term. Lean on your therapist for support too. Remember - no job defines your worth.</p><p> </p><p>Regardless, keep focusing on self-care, like making time for hobbies and friends. The skills you're gaining now will serve you well in finding a better suited opportunity. You've already accomplished so much through your education. Have faith that with time, you'll find a career path that aligns with your strengths and personality. Just take it one day at a time and be proud of small wins. </p></div>", "date": "03-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/new-grad-and-work-anxiety/td-p/573593" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48778", "content": "<p>hi i've never posted anything like this before and i'm really scared to do it, but i feel so anxious about making mistakes at work. some things i thought were mistakes ended up not being mistakes, but some did and now i am constantly stressed about past mistakes coming back to bite me or that i'm on the verge of making another mistake. i feel useless at work which is a high stress clinical job and it has been impacting my sleep, my self-esteem, my motivation, and my apetite. i've been through a really bad breakup in the last few months too which has made my anxiety spiral because my main support person left my life very abruptly without giving a reason. i feel like if he was still around i could talk to him about it. </p><p>i feel like i don't have anyone i can share my thoughts and anxieties with because i'm scared of making my friends and family sick of me and my problems like i did my ex. i'm convinced everyone is sick of my mess and that everyone will wake up and realise i'm awful and unlovable. i see a psychologist and have recently been put on meds but i'm still in a constant state of panic, dread, worry and fear. i feel like nothing is ever going to get better and my life is always going to be a mess. i don't know how to start cleaning the mess up and it's so overwhelming and scary. has anyone been through anything similar and have any advice? i'm really struggling and appreciate anyone even reading this.</p></div>", "date": "28-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-at-work/td-p/573359" }, { "author": "user-id/48780", "content": "<p>Hello anxiety at work</p><p>I am experiencing exactly what you described as well.</p><p>I barely eat i barely sleep</p><p>I find work exhausting at best</p><p>I'm trying to practise meditation but </p><p>I can't relax enough to enjoy the benefits.</p><p>I'm seeking relief too.</p><p>I don't know where to start <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":disappointed_face:\">😞</span><span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":disappointed_face:\">😞</span><span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":disappointed_face:\">😞</span></p></div>", "date": "29-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-at-work/td-p/573359" }, { "author": "user-id/48202", "content": "<p>Hi anxiety at work,</p><p>Congratulations on plucking up the courage to open up on the forum. You have come to the right place. So many people are frightened of making mistakes yet this the way we all learn.</p><p>You seem to be going through a lot in your personal life as well so I can understand how your anxiety is skyrocketing.</p><p>When I experienced workplace bullying, I had really bad anxiety at work, I even used to check my photocopying to make sure all the pages had gone through the machine! Now I look back, I can see how ridiculous that was but, like you, I was terrified of mistakes and thought I was totally incompetent. Not so!</p><p>When you have a little time, I wonder if you could try this exercise. Think about the hardest thing you you've been through in your life. Write down all the diiiculties you had at that time. Now make a list of all the strengths you demonstrated at that time. Keep going - this make take a few days but I bet you'll discover that you are far from useless. But once we start to worry, our minds go crazy and we imagine everything that can go wrong.</p><p>Think about Superman - he's supposed to be so bright yet he wears his underpants on the outside of his clothes. How many of us make a stupid mistake like that?</p><p>Are you able to take leave from work for a while? Perhaps your doctor could give you a certificate. I feel you would benefit from a rest and perhaps some gentle exercise and a few good soaks in the bath, if that's something you'd like to do or listen to some relaxing music and give that overworked mind of yours good rest.</p><p>I hope this has been helpful for you. Please stop being so hard on yourself and learn to love yourself as a wonderful imperfect human being.</p><p>Warmest regards,</p><p>Richju </p><p> </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "29-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-at-work/td-p/573359" }, { "author": "user-id/48805", "content": "<p>Hey, I’m reaching out to you because I feel these things also, not constantly but when I do it feels like the anxiety is shredding me alive and my heart beaters right out of my chest and the bloody pines in my ears. I’m so sorry about your emotional support person leaving so suddenly, it can be a real kick in the guts because your left not understanding or reasoning what the reason for them leaving you was. It’s currently my biggest fear, I’m in a new relationship of 9 months and 2 months ago we had a massive fight which caused us to nearly loose each other and I never felt such terror and anxiety in my life but we worked through it and it’s getting better I think. Try not to doubt yourself , life’s obstacles come and they go but you can make a Choi e which can be to either try your best to face them or let them crumble and crush you. I believe you are so so much stronger than that. KEEP PUSHING XO</p></div>", "date": "31-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-at-work/td-p/573359" }, { "author": "user-id/34847", "content": "<p>Hi there, I feel very drawn to this post myself. I’ve had a terrible run of luck these past few years with so many things going wrong and a few high points along the way. I’m terribly afraid of loosing my job myself and I know that I’m going to loose sleep and see my health suffer again. I get the not telling friends or family thing too, I’m afraid they will react badly so like you I just end up bottling the pressure inside. </p></div>", "date": "03-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-at-work/td-p/573359" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/12833", "content": "<p>Health Anxiety</p>\n\n<p>Here I am again….. it’s a never ending battle.. trigger warning…</p>\n\n<p>37M with Health anxiety for over 15 years.</p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>I’ve had numerous self diagnosed medical diseases that I’ve dwindled on for months on in and until some professional intervention (scans etc) the symptoms were there everyday.</p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>My new one (and I need some help on this one) has been a mid back pain that comes around after 2pm ish and makes me bloat, alongside stomach pains and a full feeling after eating… this started Feb this year..</p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>When this symptom started I already was going through another episode that lingered for 2 months.. so the doctor prescribed me medication.. and funnily enough 4 weeks into the meds I was symptom free. And I continued to be symptom free until early June (which is when I tapered off Lexapro)</p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>From early June until the first week of August this continued and then it finally disappeared.</p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>On the 15th of August, I went into my GP and he ordered blood work and everything came back normal besides my Ferritin which was just under the normal, and when I told him what I went through, he suggested that I see a GI doctor.</p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>So I went to see a GI doctor, and he suggested that we should do an endoscopy and colonoscopy( I had both done 3-4 years ago and was clean)… this is where it went downhill.</p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>He started saying we should do this because if it is Cancer, we would want to catch it early. I freaked out, I then asked him the likelihood (considering that I’m pain free now, and that the pain was gone when I was on medication) he brushed it off…</p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>Until yesterday my stomach pains were non existent and it is back in full force.</p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>Please talk some sense into me… I am literally freaking out.</p></div>", "date": "02-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety-back-again/td-p/573640" }, { "author": "user-id/48737", "content": "<p>I totally get it. I have Crohn's Disease, diagnosed 16 years ago and then had a hemi-colectomy (removal of the scarred and diseased part of the GI) 15 years ago. Ever since I have been on medication, for the first few years I was on long-term doses of steroids (think bloated face ++) and other immunosuppressants. I now have to also have 8 weekly Infliximab infusions at local hospital (takes 2-3hours) as the oral medication was not doing enough to stop the disease being active. I had the most horrendously painful recovery after this surgery and I was also told I had a greater risk of bowel cancer because of the disease. I also had cervical spine surgery in 2015 to remove a disc and replace it with a prosthetic one and titanium plate and screws to hold it in place and I remember being in the anaesthetic room with two anaesthetists attending to my IV etc and looking up at the light above me and wondering if this was the last time I would ever have any thoughts at all. After a routine scan of my  cervical spine to check progress I got the report back and it stated that I had metastatic bone disease (bad). It took a day or so and then my anxiety shot through the roof and I didn't sleep for more than an hour a night for the next week or so until someone gave me something to temporarily calm me down. I then left my work in the middle of the day to go back to the hospital to see if (hopefully) the radiologist had made a mistake in his reporting because I had suddenly developed such insane anxiety about dying... after a little wait I had someone take me into a room and assure me that the Dr remembered my scan and it was a transcription error. I felt temporarily relieved, but this wrong report set off the longest bout of crippling anxiety in my life (6 years, still to this day - although detoxing from alcohol and a benzo anxiety med that I was abusing to take away the anxiety - the last 2 weeks have been better). For so long after reading the diagnosis, even though it turned out to be false, I was so mistrusting of any physician, even my neurosurgeon, telling me it was not bone cancer and I wasn't going to die, the fear stayed with me and really messed me up!</p><p> </p><p>I totally get the freaking out, it is scary and increases the anxiety to sometimes uncontrollable levels (for which I abused alcohol etc for at least some peace). I don't know if I have helped, but I have complete empathy for you and I hope you are able to feel at ease.</p><p> </p><p>Take good care of yourself!</p></div>", "date": "03-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety-back-again/td-p/573640" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48825", "content": "<p>What are some strategies you use to help with anxiety? </p></div>", "date": "02-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-help/td-p/573624" }, { "author": "user-id/37850", "content": "<p>Hello 1979_lou &amp; welcome.</p><p>There are many people who have come to BB with their difficulties with anxiety. Look around in the Anxiety section, where you posted this discussion &amp; I'm sure you can discover many ways people use to manage their anxiety.</p><p>Also there are discussions in Caring for Myself and Others.</p><p> </p><p>From my own history, I have learned I manage best when I take time to reflect, maybe I write, or talk to someone, &amp; think about the things I'm anxious about &amp; if there is anything I can do to help solve the problem, or who to talk to about the problem I'm worrying about, &amp; see what suggestions they can offer. If it's early enough in the day, a weekday perhaps, I can phone for answers to questions, which would help to give me the idea I'm moving towards solving the problem.</p><p>That's fine for practicle problems that need sorting.</p><p>Sometimes, I am aware my anxiety isn't about any practical problem. It could relate to a fear I might have about something happening or even something that might not happen, too.some of these things are out of my control. That can make me feel anxious. What can I do? I always ask myself that question.</p><p>I also ask myself how likely is it that the fear I have, will actually happen?</p><p>Sometimes I need to take a deep breath, summon some courage, lift my head up, as if to face the fear &amp; anxiety about it &amp; go on anyway. Letting myself feel the fear &amp; doing what I need to do anyway. It can be jolly hard, but with practice, it's getting easier. I am learning I can do more than I think I can.</p><p>One thing I am anxious about is how people will respond to me when I speak up &amp; ask for what I need. Logically, if I speak up &amp; they say 'no' &amp; I don't have my needs met, then I haven't lost anything. If I don't speak up I still have not lost anything. I simply woun't know what they might have said. Maybe they might have said 'yes'. If they say 'no', I will feel disappointed, maybe that they didn't care, maybe I didn't ask 'properly', (Whatever that means), or maybe I feel I am asking 'too much'. I'm still working on how I feel, trying to not blame myself &amp; being down on myself, but at least, I know I can live with these feelings &amp; continue to learn from my experiences.</p><p>You do ask a big question. I could say more. Maybe that's enough to go on with, though, to give you something to think about.</p><p>Oh, I also think, observing yourself &amp; what happens when you feel anxious, &amp; deliberately, firstly, calming your own breathing, taking slow &amp; deep breaths really helps your entire body settle down.</p><p>Hugzies</p><p>mmMekitty</p></div>", "date": "02-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-help/td-p/573624" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/21234", "content": "<p>I’ve been Feeling really anxious since Friday Night, to the point where I spent Saturday and Sunday night sobbing and feeling like I was going to be sick at first I thought it was about my dentist app which happened yesterday but the feeling hasn’t gone away. I’m headachy, I’m stressing over everything. I see my psychologist next Friday and I see my doctor tomorrow, I’m hoping to discus wether I could have my Medications Adjusted</p></div>", "date": "29-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-getting-worse/td-p/573393" }, { "author": "user-id/48776", "content": "<p>I'm so sorry to hear you are going through this struggle, it really is like our own war zone, going to battle every single day trying not to let it beat us...it just gets so overwhelming sometimes, and really does become unbearable, just know you are most definitely not alone in what you are going through, not that knowing that makes it any better or takes it away at all, but i feel it brings even the slightest sense of comfort knowing others in the world are experiencing the same/similar things....your anxiety sounds debilitating, i can relate, anxiety creeping up and hitting like a tonne of bricks for no good reason...it's just awful! Us as human beings feel the need to make sense of everything, and for the anxiety to happen without any reason is so confusing to us and it hits so much harder when there is no reason behind it i find...i hope seeing your doctor helps by adjusting your meds, that would be great if that's all that is needed to help you...if not i hope seeing your psychologist next Friday will give you some helpful tools and strategies to get you through this painful time...let me and all of us know how things go with your doctor and psychologist, i have my fingers crossed for you that this all works out for the better...hang in there you warrior! Keep fighting as best as you can, look forward to hearing from you <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span> </p></div>", "date": "29-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-getting-worse/td-p/573393" }, { "author": "user-id/48805", "content": "<p>Hi hun, I’m super new here and I’m reading through everything everyone’s posted on here. The way you are feeling right now is something I also feel sometimes. It feels like you suffocating under your own hopelessness and you sink into this anxious depth of water, it feels like your drowning in the waves of anxiety. Show your emotions, cry them out, scream, laugh, dance, run or do whatever you can to shake them off, I find sometimes sleeping on it after eating a full meal can help but if u can’t eat food right then and there, a warm mug of tea or hot chocolate whilst listening to ambient rain music is just beautiful to help the soul heal and calm the anxiety tremors . <br><br></p><p>Let me know how u go xox </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "31-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-getting-worse/td-p/573393" }, { "author": "user-id/48776", "content": "<p>Thanks for your lovely message and advice, i really appreciate it more than words can say <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span> that is actually something i struggle with-showing my emotions, i really will work harder on trying not to hold it all in and pretend that i'm ok when i'm not....i love your advice and will have to give it a go, i think crying them out is more my style, as it is becomes so overwhelming and i get super emotional when it's just too much...I'm so sorry you also go through the same struggle from time to time, you get it...it is just awful.....i will try your suggestion of a hot chocolate whilst listening to ambient rain music, i think that will help sooth the nerves a bit <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span> i love thunderstorms, they always bring me joy and peace, so i think your suggestion may just work! xoxo thank you so so so much again for your advice, i will try these out and let you know how i go <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span> xoxo</p></div>", "date": "01-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-getting-worse/td-p/573393" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/33613", "content": "<p>Hi all</p>\n<p>Since late June 2019 I have been experience heart palpitations EVERYDAY, CONSTANTLY!</p>\n<p>By palpatations I mean a prominent heart beat- my heart rythm/pulse rate is normal.</p>\n<p>i find lying on my right side in bed uncomfortable and it brings about a dizzy feeling. In the last week lying on my left side now leads to a really prominent heart beat in my ribs. </p>\n<p>a few months ago I got check out my a cardiologist, ultrasound, ecg, stress test on treadmill, 24hr holter monitor and everything came back fine. So they say it is anxiety.</p>\n<p>Has anyone else experienced non stop palpitations for this long??? </p>\n<p>I really am looking for some suggestions on how to stop them <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":disappointed_face:\">😞</span> but obviously not my heart !</p></div>", "date": "24-01-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/43575", "content": "<p>Hi Meg</p><p>Can I ask what meds have worked for you?</p></div>", "date": "25-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/33613", "content": "<p>Hi Kass, I tried to reply but unfortunately it got deleted as we can’t mention medications on here </p></div>", "date": "01-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/33613", "content": "<p>Hi all</p>\n<p>Since late June 2019 I have been experience heart palpitations EVERYDAY, CONSTANTLY!</p>\n<p>By palpatations I mean a prominent heart beat- my heart rythm/pulse rate is normal.</p>\n<p>i find lying on my right side in bed uncomfortable and it brings about a dizzy feeling. In the last week lying on my left side now leads to a really prominent heart beat in my ribs. </p>\n<p>a few months ago I got check out my a cardiologist, ultrasound, ecg, stress test on treadmill, 24hr holter monitor and everything came back fine. So they say it is anxiety.</p>\n<p>Has anyone else experienced non stop palpitations for this long??? </p>\n<p>I really am looking for some suggestions on how to stop them <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":disappointed_face:\">😞</span> but obviously not my heart !</p></div>", "date": "24-01-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/26501", "content": "<p>Hi Meg,</p>\n<p>I’ve been experiencing the exact same kind of heart palpitations since November 2019. I just feel it beating very hard and I feel it on my neck and brain, too. I woke up from the palpitations several times a night. May I ask if you have any history of taking any kind of prescription or over the counter medications? And are you sure it is due to just anxiety and not any other physical/medical health issue? I ask because mine started after I took an over the counter diuretic for a few days over a year ago and it just never stopped. I was also treated for PTSD with antipsychotics for 2 months that caused some anxious feelings in my heart (but not palpitations). </p>\n<p>i hope you’re feeling better and I look forward to any updates you may have. </p></div>", "date": "01-04-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/26501", "content": "<p>Hi Jayden,</p>\n<p>I’ve been experiencing the exact same kind of heart palpitations, too, since November 2019. I just feel it beating very hard and I feel it on my neck and brain, too, and for me it usually happens within a few minutes after eating and it lasts for several hours at a time and throughout the night. </p>\n<p>May I ask if you have any history of taking any kind of prescription or over the counter medications? And are you sure it is due to just anxiety and not any other physical/medical health issue? I ask because mine started after I took an over the counter diuretic for a few days over a year ago and it just never stopped. I was also treated for PTSD with antipsychotics for 2 months that caused some anxious feelings in my heart (but not palpitations). <br>\n<br>\nAnyway, I hope you feel better.</p></div>", "date": "01-04-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/33613", "content": "<p>Hi Sierra,</p>\n<p>I haven’t logged on here for so long. How strange that I had someone reply to this post not long ago!</p>\n<p>I am still suffering these forceful heartbeat, dizziness, pressure in head. I’ve had every test in the book. Finally tonight I made a last minute drs appointment and she is going to start me on some anti-anxiety meds, driving home knowing I am finally going to start meds actually made me feel better.</p>\n<p>I am certain my issue is partly neck problems and partly anxiety.</p>\n<p>Do you get reflux at all? There is a link between reflux and heart palps. Try smaller meals and perhaps some OTC antacids to see if that helps </p></div>", "date": "08-05-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/40825", "content": "<p>This is exactly like me palpitations that seem to be there all the time.</p>\n<p>I too have had all the tests on my heart which show up nothing, I have had a 24 hour monitor 3 times and nothing was picked up on it just normal beats.</p>\n<p> I tried mindfulness but could not get the hang of it going to have another go</p>\n<p>Mine seem to be worse at night they probably aren't but when the house is quiet and I am lying in bed they seem to be very loud.</p>\n<p>Don't know about you but I find that if I am occupied I don't notice them but if not do i my much I feel every heart beat and it sounds really loud but probably isn't.</p>\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "09-05-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/33613", "content": "<p>Yes I am exactly the same</p>\n<p>This has been going on for almost 2 years </p>\n<p>I also feel a lot of pressure in my head and fullness in my ears. Have had soooo many tests and scans.</p>\n<p>finally a GP is going to give me some medication for anxiety - I really hope it helps <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":disappointed_face:\">😞</span></p>\n<p>In bed is the worst for me </p>\n<p>Keeping busy helps take my focus off it all. </p>\n<p>im still not 100% convinced it’s anxiety alone though </p></div>", "date": "10-05-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/23234", "content": "<p>Hi Meg_611</p>\n<p><span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span></p>\n<p>yep Ive only had mine for the past 3 months but have had them everyday as well, Ive had a history of them since I was about 20 but on and off and never lasting this long and everyday, Ive had the same things bloods, holter monitor, cardiologist, ecc, ecg, hospital and gp visits, artery scans the works as well and everything is fine however I have supraventricular ectopic beats but at that stage it was nothing to worry about because they went away. Ive been pretty fit and active for all of my adult life as well and the fittest Ive ever been at 40! Ive noticed mine seem to happen when I am tired and I go pale, Im off to get another round of heart checkups as it has been about 4 years since Ive had them, I also have anxiety but mostly managed........</p></div>", "date": "16-06-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/43575", "content": "<p>Hi Meg, best checking in to see how your palpitations are going and if the medication has helped?</p><p>I have very similar symptoms to everyone here as well. Had palpitations for about 12 months and there are the feelings of just a strong heartbeat.</p><p>I have done several tests as well on my heart and everything is ok. </p><p>Would be great to hear anyone's feedback here as well because I have had a bit of a lost as to what is really going on.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "16-07-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/47116", "content": "<p>Sorry to hear that. I’ve had a constant thudding heart for 16 months 24 hours a day, never stops thudding. The level of thudding is proportional to the heart rate, so exercise is out the question just too scary and uncomfortable.  I’ve had 4 ECGs, 2 echocardiograms, 3 doctors and 3 cardiologists look at me and they can’t find anything.  Heart rhythm and blood pressure is perfect. Bloods tests fine. I’ve never been stressed or anxious but I think this thudding heart is starting to make me that way now.  I’m desperate for answers will try anything to put it right, having a major impact on all aspects of my life. </p></div>", "date": "21-04-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/33613", "content": "<p>Hi there, I haven’t logged in to this account for a long time. Turns out it was anxiety.. my symptoms were so so physical I was convinced something was wrong with my physically. I started some mild anti anxiety meds almost two years ago and within weeks my symptoms halved. It has truly changed my life. I read part of a book my dr Claire Weekes which was helpful. Basically I feel like I had a nervous breakdown.. in that my nervous system was so outta of whack and it needed some calming down which the meds have helped with. I hope you have found some answers too x</p></div>", "date": "21-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/43575", "content": "<p>Hi Andy</p><p>Any relief from your bounding pulse?</p></div>", "date": "25-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/33613", "content": "<p>Hi all</p>\n<p>Since late June 2019 I have been experience heart palpitations EVERYDAY, CONSTANTLY!</p>\n<p>By palpatations I mean a prominent heart beat- my heart rythm/pulse rate is normal.</p>\n<p>i find lying on my right side in bed uncomfortable and it brings about a dizzy feeling. In the last week lying on my left side now leads to a really prominent heart beat in my ribs. </p>\n<p>a few months ago I got check out my a cardiologist, ultrasound, ecg, stress test on treadmill, 24hr holter monitor and everything came back fine. So they say it is anxiety.</p>\n<p>Has anyone else experienced non stop palpitations for this long??? </p>\n<p>I really am looking for some suggestions on how to stop them <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":disappointed_face:\">😞</span> but obviously not my heart !</p></div>", "date": "24-01-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499" }, { "author": "user-id/32332", "content": "<p>Dear Meg_611~</p>\n<p>Assuming the palpitations are caused by anxiety have you tried mindfulness? I'm hopeless at it all by myself and use a free smartphone app called <em>Smiling Mind</em>. It takes one right away from the current world and actually does work -though it took a little practice.</p>\n<p>As my mind does tend to have a short mindfulness attention span I appreciate the reminders the program gives every so often, and the directed actives. The horrible background music can be switched off.</p>\n<p>Croix</p></div>", "date": "25-01-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499" }, { "author": "user-id/12509", "content": "<p>Hi Meg</p>\n\n<p>i have been having heart palpitations for a year and have had the same tests as you and have come up negative apart from a mild valve leak.</p>\n\n<p>i understand how much this has a negative impact on your life.</p>\n\n<p>fir me once I found out that everything was ok with my heart I felt a sense of relief and made me better control my anxiety. Think positive thoughts, deep breathing etc</p>\n\n<p>it lasted for about 2 months or so until I have had a change of circumstances at home which has created a lot of stress and anxiety which has now resulted in the return of the heart palpitations</p>\n\n<p>I find it very hard to control</p>\n\n<p>i have been told to start on medication to control the anxiety but Iam scared of the side effects</p>\n\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "01-02-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499" }, { "author": "user-id/33613", "content": "<p>Hi Greg </p>\n<p>thanks so much for your reply.</p>\n<p>sorry to hear you have been dealing with palpatations too. <br>\nwhat are yours like? Are they fast or skipped beats? <br>\nMine are normal but an extremely strong heart beat that I can feel pounding in my neck and chest.</p>\n<p>im not on any medication, what side effects are you worried about ?</p></div>", "date": "02-02-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499" }, { "author": "user-id/13814", "content": "I am so glad I found your post. I have been experiencing the exact same thing. I have had all the heart tests but I can constantly feel my pulse in my body. Mainly on the left side from my ribs up into my shoulder. It freaks me out and is the main driver of my anxiety at the moment. Lately I have noticed it's started to abate a little in strength but its still there. My heart rate is always normal, blood pressure is ok. It's the one physical symptom I wish would go away. How are you going with it?</div>", "date": "25-05-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499" }, { "author": "user-id/41557", "content": "<p>Hi Ricman,</p>\n<p>Ironically palpitations can drive your anxiety...but they can also result from anxiety itself. Something my GP once told me - you may not consciously realise you're feeling anxious when you've felt that way for so long. But the anxiety is there and can result in physical symptoms. </p>\n<p>Have you tried using mindfulness apps whenever you feel the palpitations? I find that it helps lessen my symptoms.</p>\n<p>Take care,<br>\nM</p></div>", "date": "25-05-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499" }, { "author": "user-id/13814", "content": "<p>Thank you for your reply. It certainly does drive my anxiety and I know what it is at the time because it usually brings with it that lump in the throat feeling as well. I do use mindfulness and mediation and it does help at the time. </p>\n<p>it’s just so crazy to think these physical symptoms can linger for months and months even when the mind starts to clear and the chatter ends. </p></div>", "date": "25-05-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499" }, { "author": "user-id/33613", "content": "<p>Hi <br>\nsorry for the delay! I have just found the my threads section so can now actually check for replies! <br>\nI am still suffererig from palpitations every single day. <br>\nIt’s a normal rhythm but this extra forceful pounding heart beat, I feel it in my neck too- when I lie on my back and put my phone on selfie mode my whole neck throbs/pulsates with my pulse</p>\n<p>Its so depressing and frustrating:( </p>\n<p>a lot of my other symptoms have gone such as dizziness, spasms, brain fog, but the palpitations remain</p>\n<p>The palpitations were my first issue and the other came and went. </p>\n<p>I started reading a book by dr Claire Weekes called ‘completed self help for your nerves’ and it was quite helpful and interesting it’s on Apple Books .</p></div>", "date": "26-06-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499" }, { "author": "user-id/33968", "content": "<p>Hi Meg, I understand. I get skipped/ectopic beats, which scare the pants off me. The manifest when I get stressed, could be work or home. I have a lot on my plate at the moment so they’ve manifest again recently. </p>\n<p>I find that yoga has helped in the past, and for me, learning to say no! Further, the ‘no.’ Is a sentence and doesn’t always require any follow up. </p>\n<p>you’re not alone, keep giving us updates on your progress. </p>\n<p>Brando</p></div>", "date": "13-09-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499" }, { "author": "user-id/7822", "content": "@Meg_611 i never thought another person would go through exactly what im going through right now.</div>", "date": "30-11-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/heart-palpitations-for-7-months-straight/td-p/488499" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/43559", "content": "<p>I’m just wondering if this  new normal this new heightened I have less tolerance for nasty behaviour is because of  the anxiety , lately I feel like my world is throwing eggs at Me , and like the whole thing is gonna implode like the shattered glass effect and there’s only fragments of pieces holding together , I try to have positive thoughts, feelings but the eggs keep coming and it’s been like this for weeks now and it’s not getting any better. I’m trying to find restitution for my battled mind but it’s just not I have days of being flat as and maybe 1 day of calm before the next cycle comes in next cycle been down for a few days then calm and back to anxious the rest of the week.  Is this the new normal or is it part of the battle of anxiety? </p></div>", "date": "31-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/does-anxiety-make-your-emotions-more-heightened-amp-easily/td-p/573514" }, { "author": "user-id/40334", "content": "<p>Hi  blues23</p><p> </p><p>What you're facing sounds absolutely horrible, something no one should have to face. It sounds like you're under such an enormous amount of stress. It's so unfair how everything begins to add up to feel just plain unbearable. I'm so glad you came here for support while looking for people who can relate.</p><p> </p><p>I'm not sure if it will be relatable but last year I found myself in a position where everything began to add up while leading to a significant tipping point. I just didn't see that tipping point coming until I really began to <em>feel</em> it in a number of ways. I thought 'What is going on with me?'. I was a gal who'd managed the ins and outs of depression for decades and all of a sudden, at 52, I found myself trying to manage ongoing anxiety for the first time in my life. It was my daughter who mentioned General Adaptation Syndrome (GAS), while saying to me 'I don't think you realise just how much pressure you've been under'. She rattled off a list of things which led me to think 'No wonder I feel overwhelmed'. The 3rd stage of GAS (the exhaustion stage) was something I could completely relate to: Fatigue, burnout, depression, anxiety, <em>decreased tolerance to stress</em>, a sense of hopelessness etc. I though 'Okay, I'm going with that', my daughter's suggestion, and the reason being was because it offered me some relief. I was relieved to know how I was feeling wasn't entirely <em>me</em>, it was <em>my body</em> reacting to ongoing stress and some things in my life had to change. The scales had to be rebalanced.</p><p> </p><p>I found another way of looking at things can be from a <em>natural</em> perspective. If you're the 'go to' person when it comes to managing everyone's problems, it can turn you into someone who can easily <em>sense</em> problems/challenges (<em>sensitivity</em> gained through practice). From the perspective of ability, if someone sat you amongst 10 people and mentioned they were having some everyday kinds of issues most people have, you might be the only one out of the 10 people who can really <em>feel</em> or <em>sense</em> all the challenges in that person's day. No one else may be sensitive enough to feel them as challenges. You then might say to that person 'You mentioned 3 issues in particular that stand out to me'. You say what you feel those are and the person suddenly wakes up to how much those things <em>are</em> actually impacting them. They might say 'How did you pick up on that?', to which you could say 'I could just <em>feel</em> them as issues'. Your nervous system gives you the ability to feel them.</p><p> </p><p>So, you <em>could</em> say while sensing challenges through your nervous system can feel like a curse, especially when those challenges become overwhelming, it's your nervous system that gives you the ability to feel yourself or someone else in a challenge. My niece is <em>super</em> sensitive. She can walk into a room full of people and easily get a <em>feel</em> for who's stressed and what level of stress they're under, without anyone saying a word. She'd say they just give off vibes.</p><p> </p><p>Are you feeling <em>your</em> <em>stress</em> and <em>other people's stress</em>, combined? Are you trying to relieve other people of stress too much for your own good? Are you feeling thoroughly exhausted? I imagine you can feel the people who need to be pulling their weight more, so that <em>you</em> don't have to suffer through feeling the weight of the world on your shoulders.</p></div>", "date": "01-09-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/does-anxiety-make-your-emotions-more-heightened-amp-easily/td-p/573514" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/46011", "content": "<p>Hi </p><p>I will read others and yours too, but I thought I will introduce myself first to make you feel safe.</p><p>I am not a threat, I am not the enemy, I am not Bob The Builder either! </p><p>Who am I??</p><p>I am a person who has and still deals with Anxiety everyday, with lots of support now. And yet still get triggered by the most easiest thing but a learnt so much and come along way, just asked my wife and 2 adult kids. I would love to get to know you and you too, so I will be around making connections if you let me in to your world, I'll let you into my world too:)</p><p>Talk soon </p><p>BigB<span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":smiling_face_with_sunglasses:\">😎</span></p></div>", "date": "28-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-m-new-at-this/td-p/573320" }, { "author": "user-id/48783", "content": "<p>Hi BigB, nice of you to share your story. Anxiety is horrible isn't it? Good to hear you are getting by, learnt alot &amp; doing well. I have withdrawn my AD and after 8 months with sporadic sleep and high anxiety, am struggling. Do you take medication or are you using other ways to stay healthy? </p></div>", "date": "29-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-m-new-at-this/td-p/573320" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/28239", "content": "<p>Hi, <br>Is there anyone here that suffers with Health Anxiety?</p></div>", "date": "27-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety/td-p/573255" }, { "author": "user-id/17537", "content": "<p>Hi Nkme,</p><p> </p><p>Yep, I suffer from health anxiety, as I'm sure some other forum members do too. It can be tough, and I'm sorry if it's something you're going through. We're here to listen if you have any experiences you want to share or questions you'd like to ask. </p></div>", "date": "27-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety/td-p/573255" }, { "author": "user-id/46594", "content": "<p>Hello! Yes I do too, at times less than at other times. <br>Varies in severity and the focus changes from different body parts or concerns over time, which is how I know it’s not necessarily based on reality all the time.</p><p>Feel free to post anything or any questions, people here are very supportive </p><p> </p><p>wag x </p></div>", "date": "28-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety/td-p/573255" }, { "author": "user-id/48778", "content": "<p>Hi,</p><p> </p><p>I do, too. It can feel very scary. I'm sorry if you are experiencing this. It's so nice to see people being so supportive of each other. As others have said, post any quesitons or experiences and we will listen. xxx</p></div>", "date": "28-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety/td-p/573255" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48603", "content": "<p>Not getting any help with this, feeling like people are starting to be cynical about my mental health again. But is incredibly difficult when some of these same people are just \"suppressive\" and \"dont care\", then also \"want me to speak out\". People cant manipulate what you say, if it comes to feelings I just think the only reasonable thing would be is not swearing and trying not to be harsh, rude. Otherwise negative things, negativity is just becoming a part of my life again. Just how it is, anyone else here agree with this? Let me know and your thoughts on how you'd improve yourself. In this situation  </p></div>", "date": "15-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-ad-hd-symptoms-rolled-into-depression-and-anxiety/td-p/572479" }, { "author": "user-id/48603", "content": "<p>Sorry guys that I havent made this post specifically about anxiety, but yeah the anxiety is there. From being \"unable\" to freely speak out, in a respectful manner about how Im going personally to anyone really- be it professional/not  </p></div>", "date": "15-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-ad-hd-symptoms-rolled-into-depression-and-anxiety/td-p/572479" }, { "author": "user-id/46594", "content": "<p>I wish I knew a wise way to help you Stephen, but I read your post and I totally hear you </p><p>Sorry couldn’t be more help tonite, having a bit of a spiral moment myself but hopefully you’re seeing things with more clarity today? <br><br></p><p>wag x </p></div>", "date": "18-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-ad-hd-symptoms-rolled-into-depression-and-anxiety/td-p/572479" }, { "author": "user-id/48603", "content": "<p>Hey Wag all good mate, yeah sort of more clarity but people will still fire up back at me I reckon. Oh well Im not dying without trying as they say, well Im definitely not gloomy at all like that. But yeah not giving in to people trying to bring me down, anyway yeah nice of you to respond. All the best  </p></div>", "date": "19-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-ad-hd-symptoms-rolled-into-depression-and-anxiety/td-p/572479" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/46594", "content": "<p>Hi everyone, I’m here tonite because sometimes - not all the time- but sometimes I feel like it is all very hopeless. <br>It feels like- if I have a great therapy session then I’ll have a physical hiccup, if I get through a week of elevated panic attacks and get some respite then my insomnia will kick back in to exacerbate the cycle. <br>If my daily anxiety disappears for a whole day or two then life admin will exhaust me while I try and tick boxes social or family or obligations otherwise. <br>and so it begins again. The spiral back and forth between what feels like juggling multiple mental health issues and the affiliated crap your body processes alongside all that too. <br>it feels… never ending </p><p>it feels … tortuous </p><p>and I feel like… a solution will never be forthcoming or available. <br>And as I’m sure anyone here knows or on some level understands, it feels lonely. <br>And I’m tired of the pain. <br>But I’m just here to vent, needed to get that out. It seems to get worse at night? Anyone else find that? Any symptoms or flare ups after dark? <br>I do know tomoro is another day. <br><br></p><p>wag x </p></div>", "date": "18-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/the-slow-battle/td-p/572671" }, { "author": "user-id/37850", "content": "<p>Hello Wag</p><p>It's like that, eh? A rollercoaster, a bumpy road, hills &amp; valleys, or even like being a ball in a huge pinball machine.</p><p>I have thought the nights are worse, mostly because there are fewer things to keep me distracted than there are during the day.</p><p>However, taking a long look back, I can see that over all I am better in many ways than I was. Admittedly, my physical health may have been worse than I knew, because then I was paying no attention to that. Now I'm getting older &amp; have learned ways I can manage my psychological well-being better, my physical health is more fragile. So  now I have to focus on that more than ever before.</p><p>It sure does feel good to have a rave obout how you are feeling about the turbulence of life, though, don't it? You are welcome to vent here anytime.</p><p>Hugzies</p><p>mmMekitty</p></div>", "date": "18-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/the-slow-battle/td-p/572671" }, { "author": "user-id/46594", "content": "<p>Thanks for replying mmMekitty </p><p>love that user name haha </p><p>yep you got that right! <br>I know it’s really just life in general it doesn’t stop it just keeps coming, but I do need to just say it out loud sometimes or in this case write it out. <br>like that makes what I’m feeling somehow more real but also validated. Like I’m not going crazy </p><p>it’s a thing, it gets overwhelming, it’s here to stay but it’s not just me. <br>I’m glad to hear you’ve found some manageable solutions. And I do hope the physical health side of things isn’t too bad, that sounds stressful combined with getting older and I’m sure grateful you took the time to offer me some support </p><p> </p><p>wag x </p><p>(you know I have a cat perched on my rib cage right now thank goodness for purring frequencies and it’s the only thing getting me through the evening I swear hehe) </p></div>", "date": "18-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/the-slow-battle/td-p/572671" }, { "author": "user-id/37850", "content": "<p>Thanks Wag.</p><p>A lot of the time we might wish things would just go away, but that's all just that - a wish.</p><p>It's rather like my eyesight, very, very poor, (none at  all on the right), &amp; not going to improve. All we can do is manage, trying to keep it from getting worse until there is no sight in my left either.</p><p>My mental health is not in the same bad state my eyes are in. I have more options for managing my mental health than I do for my eyesight. I think you do too.</p><p>Writing is still one of my favourite ways of managing my mental health.</p><p>Writing is not the only way to express what we are thinking &amp; feeling. You can delve in &amp; find what is at the centre &amp; give it a visual form, 2D (picture) or 3D (a physical form) or 4D (song I guess). I painted for a while. Not a songwriter, I would like to sing the songs I heard which seemed to express my emotions.</p><p> </p><p>One of the things I loved best about my cat, Mekitty, was when she would purr while lying next to me. I would reach to pet her while she purred &amp; then continue until she fell asleep. Those minutes wer so peaceful &amp; helped me so much. Tha't's her in my picture. The extra 'mm' of my username is her purring. I might have made it longer, but, thought 'mmMekitty' is enough.</p><p> </p><p>Hugzies</p><p>mmMekitty</p></div>", "date": "19-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/the-slow-battle/td-p/572671" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/47740", "content": "<p>There are many different ways you can come back to healing and coming back to peace. The journey that each of us have to walk is different and unique and no one pathway in life is the same so we all need different guidance and support on our journey. It is like your going on a journey like harry potter or even cinderalla. Cinderalla didn't become cinderalla with out challengers.</p><p> </p><p>The adversity you face can be difficult but it is how you rise through it that defines your inner strength a and fortitude. There will be times on your journey you will want to turn around and walk in the other derection and give up but the hero didn't become the hero with out looking inside themselves and finding the magical powers to stand up to there demons.</p><p> </p><p>saying to yourself</p><p> </p><p>I more powerful then merlin and I beleive that I will not let this mountain in the front of me defeat me I choose to realise my true power by not letting my disability define who I am and who I will become. You must look into your magical heart and realise you have power with in you and every one has this magical power with in.</p><p> </p><p>Your self belief in your magical powers that you have more power then you realise. You have to realise your true purpose in life.</p><p> </p><p>What am I truly meant to acheive and I mustn't give up?</p><p> </p><p>There are many things you can do to heal for example there might be a sport you would like to play to help you. You might love cooking for the family it is important you do what you find helps you to heal with the guidance of your family.</p><p> </p><p>In the land of magic there are dragons but no these dragons are great healers and protectors of the realm. If you beleive magic exists in your heart it does. Many times I was scared that my illness was going to defeat me but many times but I beleived my dragon was protecting me.</p><p> </p><p>You must beleive in the good whit magic within and remember you are nver alone.</p><p> </p></div>", "date": "19-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/the-true-magical-power-of-the-healing-heart/td-p/572728" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48633", "content": "<p>I was diagnosed with anxiety 6 years ago (as well as PTSD).  This was partially due to having a mother that was in and out of my life from the time I was 3 weeks old (brought up by my grandparents), did not know who my father was (found out in 2018) and an abusive ex partner. My grandmother was a very controlling person who dominated my life, she used me as a method of trying to control my mother (who was 21 and a single mother when I was born), this was the main cause of my anxiety.  My ex partner was a lovely person until he smoked weed and drank at the same time, this would lead to him getting very violent, the first time was just after we had bought our house.  The problem is now at the slightest hint of any stressors I spiral into anxiety very quickly, I have been given strategies by psychologists to deal with this, however it seems like my brain just short circuits.  This is now causing major issues with my husband who is on the receiving end of this behavour.  He has a really hard time understanding (although he does know my situation).  I don't want to lose this relationship but I am worried that if I cannot get this under control I will.  I also have a big problem showing any type of affection, I feel like I've tried to deal with these issues but being a bit of a people pleaser when talking to psychologists, have just not dealt with things as I should have.  Not sure what I'm looking to get out of this, just want to get off the treadmill I seem to be on</p></div>", "date": "15-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-ongoing-anxiety-due-to-childhood-issues-and/td-p/572487" }, { "author": "user-id/19707", "content": "<p>Hi, welcome. </p><p> </p><p>You have a few issues and I'm glad you wrote in. We are people with lived experience and there is some things mentioned I've endured myself. I'm happy you have a psych to help you too.</p><p> </p><p>I too had a controlling mother, like your grandmother was. The fallout from that can be lifelong issues like your anxiety and lack of confidence even widespread enough to cover becoming a \"people pleaser\". Just not enough pats on the back and too much controlling has terrible results. So inground are these problems we experience that as adults we carry them lifelong and what we can hope for is the best out of ourselves from a programmed mind... sounds bad eh, but we shouldnt ever give up on a happy life, as happy as we can make it for the cards we are dealt.</p><p> </p><p>Talking just about some people, lets stick to some women that control others and use them as pawns in their quest to dominate, in my case it all unravelled when I googled something my friend told me. Google - \"<strong>queen witch hermit waif</strong>\". Those 4 characters my mother had an it answered why I ended up messed up. </p><p> </p><p>The good news is that when you begin to accept that these parents or grandparents, major influencers, it leads you to a judgemental attitude that places them in a pigeon hole. I call it the \"pigeon hole of parental incompetence\". i.e. you begin to accept that such upbringing was not your fault and they had no idea how to protect you from abuse and it IS ABUSE. </p><p> </p><p>People like us can search the world for answers but there is a few issues about that- every situation is unique and might need long discussion, you need to be open minded and determined to overcome and that could develop and be kind to yourself.</p><p> </p><p>The benefit of this forum is we are open 24/7/365. Post and you will be answered sometimes you need to wait till one of us is online. You can keep your thread ongoing, just ask questions. Eventually you might answer questions of someone younger in a similar situation. Thanks for posting.</p><p> </p><p>TonyWK</p></div>", "date": "19-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-ongoing-anxiety-due-to-childhood-issues-and/td-p/572487" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48646", "content": "<p>Hi all, </p><p> </p><p>I just wanted another person's opinion on how exactly do I overcome my issue of comparing myself with others? I know the harm of it, and I can very much feel the pain that it gives me but I just can't stop. For instance, I either feel like I'm never doing enough / never achieving enough / my life isn't where I expect it to be etc.</p><p> </p><p>It's really messing with my head and has led to quite bad anxiety and I'm not too sure what to do. Open to any input and advice.</p></div>", "date": "17-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-comparing-oneself/td-p/572598" }, { "author": "user-id/2579", "content": "<p>I remember my school days where it was imperative to wear the same clothes, brand of shoes, and even modify our natural speech and behaviour to meet some invisible law of conformity.<br>This is just a genetic throwback to our primitive social survival skills (pack mentality, safety in numbers, trying not to get eaten by a sabretooth tiger...) and has fueled a huge industry which exploits these primal urges by reminding us how pitiful we all are without whatever deception they are selling.</p><p><br>As adults, when one would like to believe we had more sense, the trend carries on into what car we drive, the 'statement' our interior decor exudes (being somehow 'definitive' of our true selves?), and again creating some impulse to dispense with the <em>perfectly adequate</em> and replace it with the <em>conventionally accepted</em> social standard of the day.<br>Indeed, it powers the economy and all the rubbish we produce from the mindless churnings of industry.</p><p><br>Lifting the veil on all of this is your first objective, setting your own standards to live up to comes next. The final step is when you realise you do not need to be a follower and your place in this world is uniquely exquisite without betraying one iota of your self identity.</p></div>", "date": "17-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-comparing-oneself/td-p/572598" }, { "author": "user-id/46594", "content": "<p>Hmmm hey bigaloo</p><p>hope you are doing better today, it sounds a bit like you have some negative self talk happening and that’s a really painful place to be in your mind! I feel for you on that. <br>do you recognise where these sort of feedback loops come from? Is this perhaps a learned and internalised thought system that maybe isn’t even your own!? Did you grow up being told you weren’t good enough or are you under tremendous pressure to perform based on somebody else’s standards? <br>I can’t give you any really decent advice but I hope someone here can, I do feel very strongly however that you deserve some appreciation and to cut yourself some slack. I’m sure you use a lot of energy just burning head miles with these issues and don’t forget you deserve rest and a break. Be kind to yourself. <br>Also the only other thing I’ve found that helped with this sort of thing is getting out and volunteering (cleanup days, soup kitchen, planting trees) </p><p>it does wonders for your self esteem and gaining perspective, and getting a real read on other people and what they go through or experience which might help you differentiate a sense of self and other in a more productive sense. <br><br></p><p>wag x </p></div>", "date": "18-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-comparing-oneself/td-p/572598" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48636", "content": "<p>I’m first time writing on here. <br>I am unsure if I’m in the right place. <br>you see I’ve been pushing that same boulder up the hill, I’m <strong>Sisyphus,</strong></p><p><strong>I did the right thing I helped someone and all it did was allow me to have everything taken from me. <br>I’m not feeling sorry for myself, I’ve been given a task. <br>I’ve been doing that task and it’s been horrible but familiar. Now I don’t have to do that task anymore and I’m trying to work out what I’m here for and why it’s still hurting so badly if I’m not doing it anymore?</strong></p><p><strong>I’ve read all the books i know all the answers, I mean anyone on here willing to talk does. </strong></p><p><strong>(Let me give anyone advice and a diagnosis).<br>That’s not what I’m after. <br><br></strong></p><p><strong>I want to know how do you do it? Where do you start?</strong></p><p><strong>what exactly is the answer?</strong></p><p><strong>I’ve checked the back of all of those books, it’s not in there. Now that I can move in any direction I can’t move. <br>I’m not having trouble taking steps I’m having trouble making any sense of my steps, they don’t have meaning. I don’t have direction. I used to be strong and powerful with direction, now who am I?</strong></p><p><strong>who is <strong>Sisyphus without a hill?</strong></strong></p></div>", "date": "16-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/pushing-that-same-boulder/td-p/572542" }, { "author": "user-id/40334", "content": "<p>Hi Sisyphus</p><p> </p><p>I've found that steps have little meaning or feel to them without a goal. This is something I've just discovered for myself at 53. Stepping stones heading <em>towards</em> somewhere feel like points of progress and there is a sense of satisfaction in that. There's a sense of achievement with every step forward, whether that step in on level ground <em>or</em> up a hill. </p><p> </p><p>It's such a tormenting feeling, not have a sense of direction. At times I'd compare it to the feeling of sitting alone at crossroads in the middle of nowhere, with my head buried in my lap while in state of despair. There is no directional sign and not a single guide in sight. It has a kind of <em>waiting</em> feel to it, while waiting for some guide to show up in life and say 'This way' and it turns out to be the right way.</p><p> </p><p>I truly feel for you, given your last mammoth task, one that led to some form of sufferance. If it's in our nature to please and to serve in some way, sometimes we end up being the last person we please and serve well. At the end of such a challenge, who are we if we have stopped pleasing and serving others? Are we someone who waits for the next person to please and serve in some way, for some sense of fulfillment? That nature is just a <em>part</em> of us, not entirely who we are. Perhaps the question comes down to 'If the pleaser or helper or server in me is just <em>one</em> facet that makes up who I am, how many more facets are there and how do I discover them and bring them to life?'.</p></div>", "date": "18-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/pushing-that-same-boulder/td-p/572542" }, { "author": "user-id/46594", "content": "<p>It sounds like you’ve been an amazing and strong kind and hardworking person, with a big burden on your shoulders that has recently been lifted. <br>my understanding from what you wrote is that you feel sad. <br>you feel very down. <br>you are experiencing grief perhaps.</p><p>And I just want to say that there is no rule or set time frame for grieving or processing that sadness. There is no right or wrong way to go about it. <br>And while you feel like you need the next thing the next mission the next identity please consider giving yourself plenty of grace and compassion first. <br>don’t rush it, you will find it. <br>allow yourself time to feel and heal. <br><br></p><p>wag x </p></div>", "date": "18-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/pushing-that-same-boulder/td-p/572542" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/43559", "content": "<p>As above is it ?</p><p> </p><p>im having struggles same issues as b4 sometimes I want to run away just run never come back , Is it possible to restart your life elsewhere be a nomad while I realise this is impossible I have a young child I want to pick up roots and run it’s been calling to me that feeling of restarting my life but also feel stuck and afraid to do so but it still calls to me the solution is to leave and restart elsewhere, but is it really the answer or will it create more problems? If I run away </p></div>", "date": "17-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/is-it-ever-helpful-to-run-away/td-p/572583" }, { "author": "user-id/3729", "content": "<p>Hi blues23,</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>Thank you for such a brave, honest and open post. We can hear you have so much going on and it is understandable that you’d be feeling overwhelmed. <br><br>That feeling of wanting to run away is something that a lot of people can certainly relate to at some point in their lives and is a completely normal response to situations that are causing us distress. <br> <br>It can be helpful to talk openly about how you are feeling with someone you trust. If you’d like to talk things through at any point, the Beyond Blue counsellors a call on 1300 22 4636, available 24/7, or you can <a href=\"https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/get-immediate-support\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener nofollow noreferrer\">speak to them on webchat here</a>.</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>Thank you again for sharing here today. Our wonderful community is here to provide you with as much support, advice and conversation as you need. </p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>Kind regards. </p>\n<p>Sophie M </p></div>", "date": "17-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/is-it-ever-helpful-to-run-away/td-p/572583" }, { "author": "user-id/37850", "content": "<p>Hello Blues23</p><p>In my experience, running away doesn't help because much of what is distressing us is from within ourselves, &amp; that needs to be dealt with.</p><p>Sophie M has given you some good advice, which I would also have added here. Talking over what is troubling you is useful. Talking can help to clarify what you are thinking &amp; feeling, can help you work out what to do &amp; make decisions.</p><p>Talking to people here can help too.</p><p>You can trust, you are not alone in this.</p><p>Hugzies</p><p>mmMekitty</p></div>", "date": "17-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/is-it-ever-helpful-to-run-away/td-p/572583" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Hi Blues and welcome.</p><p>Im sorry that you are feeling the way you are at the moment.</p><p>Ive often felt like running away to a country town and a fresh start.</p><p>All though having no real family support i do have some great friends who look out for me and care and i would hate to walk away from that. I also do a bit of volunteering at a local football club and this is great for me.</p><p>Im not sure if you have similar but i guess im just bringing to light the value of the things that can mean a lot to us.  Hope you have good day and happy to talk more.  </p><p>Brett.</p></div>", "date": "18-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/is-it-ever-helpful-to-run-away/td-p/572583" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/46425", "content": "<p>I tried to search for \"this way up\" in search box, but it didn't pay attention to the quotes and returned too many irrelevant matches.</p><p> </p><p>But what I am wondering is if anyone has worked with the anxiety programs on that site, and what your experience was like?</p><p> </p><p>Or if you want to share a different (moodgym, mindspot, etc) site that you used and liked that would be helpful too!</p></div>", "date": "14-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/opinions-about-quot-this-way-up-quot-online-anxiety-treatment/td-p/572416" }, { "author": "user-id/37850", "content": "<p>Hello Sue_</p><p>I haven't used online therapies, so I can't offer any opinion other than I think therapy generally works better when working with a therapist.</p><p>However, I thought I'd try googling: This Way Up anxiety treatment, &amp; I had some results, which indicate it is based CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy), which has been shown to be useful when treating anxiety &amp; other disorders.</p><p>I wish you the best with whatever help you find. Of-course, you are welcome to come to BB forums, or phone the BB Counsellors or use the Web hat Online link at the end of these pages.</p><p>Hugzies</p><p>mmMekitty</p></div>", "date": "14-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/opinions-about-quot-this-way-up-quot-online-anxiety-treatment/td-p/572416" }, { "author": "user-id/46425", "content": "<p>Thank you for the reply! I am seeing a therapist in person, but lately have been wondering about supplementing that process. I wasn't clear about my searching, it was the search box on this site that I was using in the hope of finding someone here who has tried it. But as my first post, all replies are most welcome!</p></div>", "date": "15-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/opinions-about-quot-this-way-up-quot-online-anxiety-treatment/td-p/572416" }, { "author": "user-id/37850", "content": "<p>Hello Sue_</p><p>No worries - I understand about how difficult it is to be clear in this format.</p><p>I wonder if your therapist could know about This Way Up?</p><p>If you find out more about it, it would be worth talking with your therapist about it, so they know what you are doing, or can even include working with This Way Up with you.</p><p> </p><p>Hugzies</p><p>mmMekitty</p></div>", "date": "15-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/opinions-about-quot-this-way-up-quot-online-anxiety-treatment/td-p/572416" }, { "author": "user-id/48634", "content": "<p>I've only tried This Way Up a little bit, specifically their social anxiety program. But I personally think that it's a good tool to try out. Not sure if it's the same for every program but the one I tried uses comics to explain strategies you can use and then gives you some activities to do at the end. I'm able to access it for free, which you can do through some clinicians that assign you programs, so maybe your therapist is able to get you on it for free and then there's no harm in giving it a go. <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span></p></div>", "date": "15-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/opinions-about-quot-this-way-up-quot-online-anxiety-treatment/td-p/572416" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48619", "content": "<p>Hi new here suffered anxiety constantly8 yrs I'm in the fear of fear cycle I can't help think this will harm me need someone to talk to </p></div>", "date": "14-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/severe-anxiety/td-p/572420" }, { "author": "user-id/3729", "content": "Hi redaire59,<br>\nThis is Sophie from the Beyond Blue moderation team. We wanted to reach out and say thank you for sharing on the forums today, and to check in with you to make sure that you’re ok. <br>\nWe wanted to let you know that is something you could discuss with the counsellors here at Beyond Blue, whether on the phone (1300 22 4636) or via webchat: <a href=\"https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support</a><br>\nIf you ever feel unsafe, the number to call is 000.<br>\nThank you again for posting, it’s a great step to have taken. There’s lots of lovely people on the forums who may be able to relate. <br>\nKind regards,<br>\nSophie M </div>", "date": "14-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/severe-anxiety/td-p/572420" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/15745", "content": "<p>I’ve had long term issues with social anxiety. I think it stems from a lack of control, particularly from childhood trauma. I have symptoms of PTSD and have emotional flashbacks occasionally.</p><p> </p><p>My anxiety issues have improved over the last 7 years, mainly due to my work. The last two years that I spent living with family made me think it was completely gone, but it turns out that because I was mostly living with people who I have long and established relationships with, I don’t experience anxiety with them. </p><p><br>I’ve always felt dread when I’ve had to interact with people I don’t have a comfortable or long relationship with and I thought this was normal. But I’ve had to move away from family this year for my mental health and I’ve noticed how bad my anxiety actually is.</p><p> </p><p>I can’t leave my room if my housemate is home. I can’t do it even if I need the bathroom or to make food, especially if their door is open or they’re in the common areas. I would rather starve and experience discomfort than leave the room and interact with them. It has nothing to do with them personally, but I just can’t.</p><p> </p><p>At this point, I wonder if it’s creating some kind of temporary eating issues. I can’t eat or even cook in front of them or even if they’re in the house. The one time I did cook was when they walked in from work. It made me so distressed I gave up. Sometimes I’ll feel panicked when I hear them coming into the house and rush to hide items of food. I know rationally I shouldn’t, but I don’t feel safe and I feel like I’m doing something wrong.</p><p> </p><p>I’m currently seeing a psychologist, so I’m getting help. But I’d love to know if anyone has any advice around managing this or if I need to pay attention to my issues with food.</p><p> </p></div>", "date": "13-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/social-anxiety-day-to-day-life-and-issues-with-food/td-p/572318" }, { "author": "user-id/43559", "content": "<p>Hi Ashii,</p><p> </p><p>sorry your going thru this. It does sound truly awful that you feel so uncomfortable eating and even holding off going to the toilet it must be taking such a toll on your health. My advice would definitely be to seek some more help on the eating side and the toileting side . I personally haven’t experienced what you are going thru . I did have periods at my job where I would withhold going to the toilet due to no staff on the floor ( smoking breaks<span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":face_with_rolling_eyes:\">🙄</span>) and when I went back for  a little while to work I found myself questioning whether I could go to the toilet this was a question in my mind if I could or if I’d be in trouble if I did go to the toilet it was so like shocking to me I was not aware that I was actually afraid of going to the toilet at work I got thru it as I convinced myself I’m going to go to the toilet even if I was nervous about going I went and I did it and it was ok . Can you try and like u know get out of your comfort zones of your room and cook yourself some food even if it’s quick then go and eat ? Sometimes we have to battle these thoughts to make them go away and to be like yes I can do this and I won’t be in trouble if I do . Definitely speak with your psychologist about it and what your going thru , I hope you can find some peace and definitely eat even store some snacks in your room like fruits : biscuits: pkts of food u know that u can eat should u feel very anxious but try to tackle it head on that’s what I’m doing with my anxiety I have to retrain my brain and thoughts it’s possible but it takes time . <br><br></p><p>take care <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":butterfly:\">🦋</span></p></div>", "date": "13-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/social-anxiety-day-to-day-life-and-issues-with-food/td-p/572318" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/47740", "content": "<p>The mind is a powerful thing when you say you want to do something it will tell you to do something else. The question is</p><p>what can I do to control the mind and my thoughts?</p><p> </p><p>how do I get control of my thoughts so it doesn't over whelm me?</p><p> </p><p>It is a matter of teaching yourself to be disciplined and step by step doing things that help you heal and bring back control. Beleive me I know how hard it is to get control of life and to keep your mind under control. There are many things you can do to help yourself it is just finding out what works and helps you recover from your situation. Ill use me as an example since being diagnosed with bipolar at 15 my life changed but I had to adapt I have to be willing to accept change and work with it. Life will sometimes give you lemons you just create lemonade.</p><p> </p><p>The way i use to control my thoughts is through having a practice of meditation everyday you can start with just 10-15 minutes a day. With the bipolar it was always hard to keep control of thoughts so I coose to practise my meditation and focus on what I can change not what I can't. A great example I am epileptic and the doctor said I can't drive but you know what I told myself despite my set back I decided to have a positive thought and a forward thinking percpective. I knew in my heart this happened to me for a reason so I could experience this so I can help others through there difficulties because I have walked in there shoes and struggled but I always had a positive spin on life. I tell myself you need to keep walking because you havn't reached the top of the mountain.</p><p> </p><p>I could have chossen to be ill all my life but I made a defining powerful decision to just focus on what I can control not what I can't. Live in the moment and by gratful for the sunshine and every meal you eat because not everyone has what you have.</p><p> </p><p>There are people in third world countries who would love to have your plate of food so be gratful for what you posses and never take it for granted. There are times where you will feel powerless but you must realise the inner strength of the mind and the power of love in your heart and the power of powerful self talk will help you through the dark night.</p><p> </p><p>I think giving to others and thinking how do I help someone else and looking outside yourself is important. Looking around and see who needs you help. I think find you skill harness it to help and support your community.</p><p> </p><p>I beleive disability is a word you can choose to let it define you or you can define it by standing up to your adversity and facing your challengers a step at a time.</p><p> </p><p>Have a wonderful day  </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "13-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/the-internal-and-healing-power-of-the-mind-to-help-us-overcome/td-p/572323" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/21164", "content": "<p>Hi all</p>\n<p>I started a thread a when I first came on here called 'can't relax' but even then I didn't mention one of my biggest issues. I have a phobia around blood pressure. I don't even like saying it or seeing it written! but I had to put it in this thread title to see if anyone can relate / advise.</p>\n<p>I get so anxious when the dr is going to take it that it's always high and so it got to a point last year where she encouraged me to take it myself at home, and by doing that we were able to decrease the meds I was on for high bp. (dr says I have 'significant white coat syndrome)</p>\n<p>Anyway I haven't taken it for ages as it still makes me anxious even doing it myself and meanwhile had put on some weight and spend a lot of time worrying about my bp. I am seeing a psychologist and while I mentioned this in my first appointment we haven't really addressed it so I'll bring it up next week cos it's clearly a) obviously not going away by itself (the worry about it) and b) quite a big worry at the moment. </p>\n<p>I know I need to talk to her, lose weight and walk more, and take it more regularly.</p>\n<p>Anyone dealt with any like this ridiculous phobia?!?</p></div>", "date": "22-05-2019", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/38824", "content": "<p>Hi annie_1</p>\n\n<p>Firstly -I feel your pain, this sounds exactly how I feel.</p>\n\n<p>My anxiety and panic re-surfaced after a routine doctors appointment a couple of months back with a new doctor as my old one retired, she discovered my bp was very high, and wanted to straight away put me on meds - so I said no and went to another docs, who was way better and actually tried to see if it would come down without meds.</p>\n\n<p>But the damage was done and ever since then, any time I go near a monitor, I get a feeling of panic over me, so I don’t know for sure if it’s truly high or it is high due to my anxiety.</p>\n\n<p>I am actually on meds now - the first time I have taken any meds for anything and I think it’s causing my shortness of breath occasionally and I’m also easily fatigued and just feel generally yuck.</p>\n\n<p>I would like to thank all who posted in this thread as it has helped ease my anxiety around bp and I hope we can all find comfort in each other.</p></div>", "date": "26-07-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/21164", "content": "<p>Hi BulldogBobby</p>\n<p>I’m sorry you’re going through this too! </p>\n<p>I hope the meds are controlling your bp for the most part but I think it’s a given that stress increases it temporarily and, for some of us, that includes having it taken!, meeting new drs etc. </p>\n<p>Has anyone suggested or have you tried - having a monitor at home and gently increasing exposure? Taking it yourself when you feel calm and rested to get a base?</p>\n<p>my best wishes to you </p>\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "27-07-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/38824", "content": "<p>Hey,</p>\n<p>I have a monitor at home and am too scared to start taking it in case it is high, I have had it taken a few times by doctors and it is slowly coming down, last one taken was when I had a stress ECG last Friday and it was 141/100 but I was anxious due to where I was - it went up to 190/110 after the stress test on treadmill but knowing that scared me even though it was after exercise.</p>\n<p>Other than that the results were normal, which I was really happy with, going to see doc when he comes back from being in isolation to see where to next.</p>\n<p>I should say I only started meds just over four weeks ago so still have time for them to kick in.</p>\n<p>How is your bp- is it under control??</p>\n<p>Take care</p></div>", "date": "27-07-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/21164", "content": "<p>Mine probably often runs a little high but nowadays I find myself thinking about it way less often. Not to say that if I were having it taken, or was in an emergency, I wouldn’t panic about it but day to day I don’t think about it. I expect you’ll get there too <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span></p>\n<p>The last two years have been so so weird - somehow I find myself less anxious generally! No control I guess…</p>\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "27-07-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/38824", "content": "<p>It’s good you seem to have the anxiety around the bp mostly under control, as you say hopefully I will get there too.</p>\n<p>Stay safe.</p></div>", "date": "28-07-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/39356", "content": "Hi Annie, I just read your post .. I have identical symptoms. Just wondering how you have coped. Living for the day I can have my blood pressure taken without putting on a cuff.</div>", "date": "19-08-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/21164", "content": "<p>Hi Helen</p>\n<p>I’m so sorry that you’re dealing with this too. I think the only thing that works for me is not thinking about it and I have found (mostly) over this pandemic period that there’s really no point being anxious about anything. Not sure that’s helpful?! and of course I’m not always anxiety free. </p>\n<p>In terms of bp - the best thing is taking it for myself (it’s definitely still not easy and I don’t take it often!). It helps knowing when I go to the dr about something else that she’s not going to take it. It was her idea. She’s retiring soon though so…</p>\n<p>The therapist I saw wasn’t helpful - let me know if you try counseling and it helps. </p>\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "20-08-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/42114", "content": "<p>Hi Annie_1,</p>\n<p>While I don’t have this, my mum does. She is going to psychiatrist too.</p>\n<p>She’s never liked doctors in general, but with blood pressure it’s a real phobia of hers. </p>\n<p>It sounds like you’re taking the right steps to deal with it, well done.</p></div>", "date": "21-08-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/21164", "content": "<p>Thanks Gloria. </p>\n<p>Has your Mum found the psych helpful?</p></div>", "date": "22-08-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/42114", "content": "<p>She hasn’t been going for too long, some of her fears relate to years back though. </p>\n<p>When I saw one for a fear of spiders I found it helped. I’ve been able to manage it better.</p></div>", "date": "22-08-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/21164", "content": "<p>Hi all</p>\n<p>I started a thread a when I first came on here called 'can't relax' but even then I didn't mention one of my biggest issues. I have a phobia around blood pressure. I don't even like saying it or seeing it written! but I had to put it in this thread title to see if anyone can relate / advise.</p>\n<p>I get so anxious when the dr is going to take it that it's always high and so it got to a point last year where she encouraged me to take it myself at home, and by doing that we were able to decrease the meds I was on for high bp. (dr says I have 'significant white coat syndrome)</p>\n<p>Anyway I haven't taken it for ages as it still makes me anxious even doing it myself and meanwhile had put on some weight and spend a lot of time worrying about my bp. I am seeing a psychologist and while I mentioned this in my first appointment we haven't really addressed it so I'll bring it up next week cos it's clearly a) obviously not going away by itself (the worry about it) and b) quite a big worry at the moment. </p>\n<p>I know I need to talk to her, lose weight and walk more, and take it more regularly.</p>\n<p>Anyone dealt with any like this ridiculous phobia?!?</p></div>", "date": "22-05-2019", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/4" }, { "author": "user-id/21164", "content": "That’s great that you were able to get help with that Gloria.</div>", "date": "22-08-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/4" }, { "author": "user-id/23037", "content": "Hi all on this thread, you sound exactly like me with the BP in a medical setting or at home, this week is more severe because I have little faith in the psych I see as she offers no actual help and judging by her questions doesn't listen or comprehend what I say, all I get from her for anything is \" do you feel there is anything you could do differently to alter the outcome\"?, I am finding just reading this thread is doing so much to help me, knowing I'm not alone, I was at my old GP having adverse reactions to new rheumatoid arthritis medication, pulpitations, nausea and itching, the Dr started getting all excited and animated about the redness and she was frightening me, she then took my BP and I was in full swing panic attack the first in 30 years, but no she jumped up swung around covering her mouth saying \"your having a heart attack, oh no, oh no, what am I going to do with you\"?, I said I'm sure it's a panick attack, she said impossible and sent me to hospital in a taxi, so yeah, now I freak out , I was able to take a good reading at home but recent hospital stay for unrelated issue put rest to that. I'm glad I'm amonst you all.</div>", "date": "28-04-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/4" }, { "author": "user-id/21164", "content": "<p>Wow Sliksista I hope you have access to another GP! Talk about fuel a person’s anxiety - that is so not the response we need from a dr!!</p>\n<p>I’m definitely not over my phobia, and haven’t found any psych suggestions to help either but what I now do when taking my own is just remember the process takes only about four deep breaths, and I play a headspace meditation while I’m doing it. If I’ve had a couple of good readings in a row then that helps too. </p>\n<p>Hope you can get back to good readings at home. </p></div>", "date": "07-05-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/4" }, { "author": "user-id/45739", "content": "<p>Hi </p><p>For some unknown reason I've realised I have the same phobia a few weeks back it puts my anxiety through the roof. Tried to talk to new gp about it and he just said breath through it but nope that's not helping. To do bp myself is the same anxiety build up to it is to much . I have given up Caffeine sugar reduce sodium alcohol increased exercise and loosing a little weight but try and do bp and what a trigger for anxiety . Feeling good but I know I'm avoiding BP.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "09-01-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/4" }, { "author": "user-id/45594", "content": "<p>Yes I have just recently </p><p>I went in for my father cause he wasn't well. He got the all clear while my BP was high, something like 155/95. BUT  you must remember if your already a anxious person like I am it will go up and your anxious too and it will spike times. Goog thing is your on BP meds just like I am, I take one a day. Yes weightloss and walking helps. I am obese but have started to lose weight so that should help physically but mentally too.  When taking your BP at home try and have your arm same height like you have it at GP and take it twice, the 2nd one is normally lower.</p><p>I went in to the GP with a fool blow anxiety attack which they put me in a room on my own cause dr was running a hour late and there was a BP monitor and I asked them to hook me up and I was taking it every 30 seconds. It was low and finally when the GP saw me it was 135/ 85 and second one 128/80. So you see BP goes up and down and you've done the right thing to be on medication. Just go for walks doesn't have to be long, even around the block that's what I do, better than nothing. Also avoid or cut down on processed food high in salt. </p><p>All the best.</p></div>", "date": "09-01-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/4" }, { "author": "user-id/47650", "content": "<p>Dude, I have this to an extreme level. I've avoided going to doctors foe years, even not applyong for jobs that require medical clearances. I literally have nigntmares about blood pressure. Of course, I'm trying to address this now (I successfully mamaged to get a hold of it ten years ago with the last regular doctor I had) but ever since then I've had to have it randomly taken it's ridiculously high, and tomorrow I'm going to the doctor to face the boogie man yet again. I'm worried taking medication will make it too low, because I'm rather fit, eat well, exercise every day and am not overweight... but then I'm terrified it's actually as high as it sometimes gets when I jabe it taken and tjat I'm going to die very soon. Even tje words \"blood pressure\" make me feel weak and giddy. I have no idea why, but it started when I was a teenager... It's so good to know I'm nit the only person who has this completwly debilitating fear. </p></div>", "date": "30-05-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/4" }, { "author": "user-id/31541", "content": "<p>I've been on blood pressure pills for about 4 years now, around 6 weeks ago I went to my doctor about something else she took. My blood pressure said it was very high and swapped BP medications. </p></div>", "date": "12-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/4" }, { "author": "user-id/21164", "content": "<p>Hi all</p>\n<p>I started a thread a when I first came on here called 'can't relax' but even then I didn't mention one of my biggest issues. I have a phobia around blood pressure. I don't even like saying it or seeing it written! but I had to put it in this thread title to see if anyone can relate / advise.</p>\n<p>I get so anxious when the dr is going to take it that it's always high and so it got to a point last year where she encouraged me to take it myself at home, and by doing that we were able to decrease the meds I was on for high bp. (dr says I have 'significant white coat syndrome)</p>\n<p>Anyway I haven't taken it for ages as it still makes me anxious even doing it myself and meanwhile had put on some weight and spend a lot of time worrying about my bp. I am seeing a psychologist and while I mentioned this in my first appointment we haven't really addressed it so I'll bring it up next week cos it's clearly a) obviously not going away by itself (the worry about it) and b) quite a big worry at the moment. </p>\n<p>I know I need to talk to her, lose weight and walk more, and take it more regularly.</p>\n<p>Anyone dealt with any like this ridiculous phobia?!?</p></div>", "date": "22-05-2019", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/21164", "content": "<p>Hi Added</p>\n<p>I’m sorry for the long gap before replying to you but unfortunately anxiety has been peaking for me too. Around a few things but reading your description of not looking at the bp monitor etc was - well we’re so alike! And awful though this sounds it was nice to read that someone else shares this fear!</p>\n<p>The meds didn’t help for me - I didn’t go on with them after feeling awful on them. </p>\n<p>Has CBT or the psych helped you? Did you end up trying hypnotherapy?</p></div>", "date": "22-12-2019", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/17965", "content": "<p>Hi, Unfortunately I developed a phobia of high blood pressure last year after I went to the Dr Every time she takes it in the surgery I seem to have a panic attack and it's really high! Now I can't even take it at home as it goes up really high at home too! Part of my phobia is I suffer quite often with dizziness (for all sorts of reasons) and I know that the meds for BP can also cause this. I am very sensitive to meds and often get awful side effects. So I don't find the thought of having to take meds at all helpful! My dad had a heart attack so am also stressed about the thought of stroke or heart attack from high BP. What a conundrum... I have read at least 4x books about lowering your BP naturally, watched numerous doco's etc as well and have tried nearly every thing under the sun...from hibiscus tea, to celery and beetroot juice, exercise, plant based diet, you name it. But I am still too freaked to take my BP. I have managed to desensitise myself to be able to buy a monitor. Now I need to be able to use it. I don't accept the idea that 'peoples BP naturally gets higher with age' as this is only the case in the developed world. In other countries, this is not the case. High BP is a SYMPTOM, not a disease and I think Dr's should work harder at finding and treating the cause, not the symptom. 'Lifestyle' illnesses eg High BP, cholesterol, anxiety, diabetes in the developed world make an awful lot of money for drug companies so in some ways I feel determined to find the cause and not be on this endless cycle of drugs (that actually inhibit your bodies' own ability to lower your BP over time so you need to keep taking more and high doses). </p>\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "06-07-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/21164", "content": "<p>Hi Hippymum, and welcome to bb forums.</p>\n<p>I'm sorry that my thread is your first post! Meaning - I'm sorry that you too are dealing with this phobia x.</p>\n<p>Can I ask - have you tried any other methods for lowering your anxiety such as meditation, yoga, cbt therapy? Anxiety for me fluctuates and at best times meditation is really helpful, slow deep breathing. When I do take my bp I take it lying down on my bed (or couch) after a period of relaxation. If I can get a good reading, or a series of them, then I'm less anxious about taking it myself. My gp basically never takes it these days! just gets me to take it at home (like you it took me some time to even buy a machine). One of the younger ones at the clinic insists and so I always just say you know it's going to be high cos I'm here so please don't tell me what it is and she agrees to that. I'd LOVE to beat this phobia and went to therapy a while back to try and sort that but for now it's still with me.</p>\n<p>I was very resistant to meds way back when..and like you I'm sensitive to meds but I have to say, after Many years of taking bp meds, that I only get dizzy when my bp is low (and over a period of time of that happening, and me taking it at home, was able to reduce the meds to a level that it stopped). I haven't found that I've had to continually increase the dose over the years. My dose has gone up and down depending on stressful life situations, and weight, and in fact about two years back was the lowest it had been in about 25 years so please don't worry about that. For me - controlling my weight has the biggest/best effect but it's not easy either...</p>\n<p>I hope you're doing ok. Sorry for the time lapse in reply and if I can help you in any other way please chat away. Or jump in any other threads you see, introduce yourself in the welcome area, you'll find many kind and helpful people on these boards. <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span></p></div>", "date": "10-07-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/16278", "content": "<p>Hi there</p>\n<p>i too have this phobia very embarrassing and hard to understand my reads are so high as soon as they put it on my arm. Reading these posts were Very helpful and I realise I’m not a freak, I don’t get it taken at the drs any more and the last 3 years I have had a 24hr monitor Once a year and the readings are perfect<span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":thumbs_up:\">👍🏼</span> So I stick to that. I do meditation and also I am bipola, i moved to regional small town away from my home 3 years ago so getting help is hard Here and I never had this problem till I moved. Anyway I have read all the comments there verY comforting in a good way.</p>\n<p> it’s just the way we are <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":grinning_cat_face:\">😺</span><br>\n<br>\n</p></div>", "date": "17-09-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/21164", "content": "<p>Hi batcat </p>\n<p>I’m glad you found the thread comforting - your post was too. Nice to meet someone who gets it <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":winking_face:\">😉</span></p>\n<p>Sorry bout the lack of support in small town regional oz... got to be others in town who could also use support. Is there a library, or community centre, you could see if any groups meet that interest you? </p></div>", "date": "19-09-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/358", "content": "<p>Hey </p>\n<p>I have had this phobia since having my second child a year ago I have changed anxiety meds and was feeling great untill I went to the doctor today and it was high .... I sitting here thinking it's reaching a point of dangerous number and I can't seem to calm down.. I'm on bp meds and all I can think of its rising and I don't no ... </p>\n<p>I hate health anxiety it really rocks me </p>\n<p>Not sure to go hospital. But when I got the trading today the doc said it's ok it's probs cause I'm anxious cause she monitors me and told me to come back in 2 days cause of my anxiety .. still not sitting right </p>\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "17-05-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/3729", "content": "Hi StephL, <br>\n<br>\nThank you for posting here on the online forums and for sharing your experience. Health realted stress and anxiety can be really difficult to manage, coming here and sharing your story is a wonderful step along your journey to feeling better. <br>\n<br>\nIf you like you can always call Beyond Blue on 1300 22 4636 and talk through your symptoms - our wonderful counsellors will be able to give you great advice on what to do when you feel anxious as well as pointing you towards further support. <br>\n<br>\nThanks again for being brave and sharing your experience, please feel free to update us on how you are feeling if you are comfortable doing so. <br>\n<br>\nKind regards, <br>\n<br>\nSophie M</div>", "date": "17-05-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/21164", "content": "<p>Hi Steph</p>\n<p>Yeah health anxiety is the pits isn’t it. </p>\n<p>You’re doing everything right - seeing your dr for monitoring so try and trust in that. Can you meditate (even briefly) once or twice a day? Listen to a calming talk on YouTube? If on Facebook Petrea King Meditation Group has some great talks you can access. Recently my dr recommended a book Beating the Blues by Tanner and Ball - self help around CBT practices. </p>\n<p>Basically keep your mind and body busy so those thoughts lose importance...take the kids for a walk? </p>\n<p>I know these sounds simplistic answers but I find they help. Hope you get relief too. </p></div>", "date": "18-05-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/19490", "content": "<p>Bit of a late reply, but i spent the better part of yesterday at hospital in the ER for this very thing.</p>\n<p>I came to associate my blood pressure readings with severe anxiety, as everytime i went to the ER with a panic attack, my BP would be really high.</p>\n<p>This also transferred to the doctors office, and as soon as they put the cuff on my arm, my anxiety skyrockets, and so does my BP.</p>\n<p>They sent me home with a BP machine and even at home, by myself in a comfortable environment, my anxiety skyrockets when i put the cuff on due to association with panic.</p>\n<p>My doctor believes i have high blood pressure, that is exacerbated by anxiety, so now i am on BP medication and seeing a psych with the hopes i can get it all under control.</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>So for what its worth Annie, you are most certainly not alone, and i wish you lots of love and luck in your journey in overcoming this.</p></div>", "date": "19-05-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/21164", "content": "<p>Thanks for the love and luck, Midean, and same to you. </p>\n<p>May the psych help you enough that you can get some decent base readings to go on with. </p>\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "19-05-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/21164", "content": "<p>Hi all</p>\n<p>I started a thread a when I first came on here called 'can't relax' but even then I didn't mention one of my biggest issues. I have a phobia around blood pressure. I don't even like saying it or seeing it written! but I had to put it in this thread title to see if anyone can relate / advise.</p>\n<p>I get so anxious when the dr is going to take it that it's always high and so it got to a point last year where she encouraged me to take it myself at home, and by doing that we were able to decrease the meds I was on for high bp. (dr says I have 'significant white coat syndrome)</p>\n<p>Anyway I haven't taken it for ages as it still makes me anxious even doing it myself and meanwhile had put on some weight and spend a lot of time worrying about my bp. I am seeing a psychologist and while I mentioned this in my first appointment we haven't really addressed it so I'll bring it up next week cos it's clearly a) obviously not going away by itself (the worry about it) and b) quite a big worry at the moment. </p>\n<p>I know I need to talk to her, lose weight and walk more, and take it more regularly.</p>\n<p>Anyone dealt with any like this ridiculous phobia?!?</p></div>", "date": "22-05-2019", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851" }, { "author": "user-id/30477", "content": "<p>Hi Annie</p>\n<p>I have not dealt with blood pressure so to speak ...but I have been on many occasions scared the bejesus out of myself on many things for really silly things. It took me a long time to figure out why I was so anxious and it feels that it is totally uncontrollable .</p>\n<p>but then one day ..a very close friend on mine ...said to be that I tend to overreact...and I’m like ...huh what ? Me overreact ??What u mean? I was totally take aback by his comments .</p>\n<p>but then I began to think about what he meant . And I realise that I in fact do . Overreact .</p>\n<p>this is just my experience and you can see how it may or may not apply to you.</p>\n<p>I had some trauma happened to me in the past and since then I have taken on this very bleak case scenarios that all crap will happen to me from here on in.</p>\n<p>So I start highlight the crap in my life ...things go wrong and I would think about how bloody crappy it was ...that yeah thats my life ...that how it is ...I’m meant to be sad .etc...and my whole story after the trauma was as bleak as the picture I would paint for myself in my own head .</p>\n<p>So after this person told me about my overreacting ...I started to observe my thoughts inside my head and I started telling myself ..the opposite ...I started to highlight the great things in my life that has gone right instead . In life there are no surefire thing ...its all a matter of balance .</p>\n<p>sure your blood pressure could blow out ...but it also could be easily managed . But you cant go on the negative what ifs...because worrying about it will not help your case. Worrying never does anything ...its a complete time waster. Instead what you have done and can continue doing is read up all you can about the blood pressure meds and equipped yourself with useful informations on the symptoms to look out for and then trust yourself , have faith in yourself that ...in whatever situation ...u be able to manage the situation , </p>\n<p>Advancements in medications in 2019 ...is astronomical . everything is almost curable . So have faith in yourself and the entire universe ..that you will be ok with this blood pressure thing that you do have and it will be easily managed. Only if you trust the process ...can you then do things that would swing your way and be less anxious and be able to stay calm come what may .</p>\n<p>I would also suggest some meditation videos by Jason Stephenson...when you start worrying excessively ...it takes practice my friend ...but trust me ..it can be done ..</p>\n<p>Stay well, keep posting </p>\n<p> </p>\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "22-05-2019", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851" }, { "author": "user-id/21164", "content": "<p>Thank you IsaJett for such a kind and positive/helpful response. I'm printing it out to remind myself and read slowly over.</p>\n<p>As long as I'm doing everything possible to be healthy that's the best I can do...I know this I just have to believe it!!</p></div>", "date": "22-05-2019", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851" }, { "author": "user-id/30477", "content": "Yay Annie ...I’m happy to help ...please keep posting to let us know your progress ..we always here for you. <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span></div>", "date": "22-05-2019", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851" }, { "author": "user-id/277", "content": "Hi annie_1, Do you take meds for it?, I take BP meds as i started to get readings of 180/110 :O. I know !...now i think its ok , but i still am a shocker for taking them (Meds). Its easy to obesss over it , years ago i was carrying around my little portable one, and when i felt dizzy or weird id be like back to the car to check it . I had to stop doing this, was turning into like OCD. Perhaps check it once a day or every other day at home, I do that , i do wonder though Anxiety's effects on BP, in the surgery it shoots up high at home, can go down to 130/70 odd. Bp is a funny thing it flucuates , and of course our Anxiety pushes it up higher. I'm forever worrying about having the big HA not using the word :D. ..but all we can do is try to be calm and help it. \n<div><span class=\"sfforumUser\" style=\"font-style: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: bold; font-size: 18px; font-family: FFDINWeb, sans-serif; background-color: #f2f2f2;\"><br>\n</span></div></div>", "date": "24-05-2019", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851" }, { "author": "user-id/21164", "content": "<p>Hi Scotty </p>\n<p>Yes, I take meds too but I often worry is it too high, is it too low....silly monkey mind!</p>\n<p>I don't like to take it too often either so as not to become obsessed with taking it but on the other hand I hate taking it! Hate seeing the numbers...it's a work in progress.</p>\n<p>I'm quite sure anxiety affects it - that's why the dr had me take it at home myself, and probably you too <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span></p></div>", "date": "24-05-2019", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851" }, { "author": "user-id/21164", "content": "<p>Have some stress this week and bp has gone up. Increased bp med but now feeling a bit off like maybe it’s too much med. can never win with this stupid phobia. I’m so sick of health anxiety!</p>\n<p>I’ve taken the advice I’ve read on here often (Paul, Geoff or Tony?) and made a double appointment with the gp tomorrow to a) try and sort this bp thing and b) talk about meds for anxiety. Time has come!</p>\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "18-07-2019", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851" }, { "author": "user-id/23826", "content": "<p>Hi Annie _1,</p>\n<p>I too have a a phobia re BP.</p>\n<p>For no discernable reason mine was elevated at GP.</p>\n<p>Cut to the chase, I now see a cardiologist who reassures me all is ok.I have a family history of cardiac disease.</p>\n<p>I have learnt to listen to specialist and be monitored by GP.Anxiety doesn't help condition so my suggestion would be to speak to your GP to control anxiety .This may help, worth a try.</p>\n<p>Ruby2</p></div>", "date": "18-07-2019", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851" }, { "author": "user-id/21164", "content": "<p>Thanks Ruby2</p>\n<p>I saw the dr today and she’s added something to my bp med, and started me on an ad re the anxiety. You’re right it should help with the bp too once it kicks in and assuming it’s right for me. </p>\n<p>For a long time I didn’t think I needed ads now I can’t wait for it to work!</p></div>", "date": "19-07-2019", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851" }, { "author": "user-id/16229", "content": "<p>Hi Annie-1 thanks for starting this thread. I thought it was only me until I read a couple of forums on this topic and then found your thread. I hope that you are feeling better now. How are your anxiety meds going? Do they seem to help?</p>\n<p>My phobia is intense and has got a lot worse over the past couple of months. It started about 12 years ago when my Dr at the time freaked out and really scared me with her thoughts about my high BP when she took it. At that time, I was able to take my BP at home and it was mostly good. Fast forward to earlier this year and another Dr freaked out about my reading in her office. Since that time, I have found that I am unable to take my BP at home without going into a panic. I also think about it constantly and worry that my health is in real danger. I have to hide my BP monitor because simply looking at it scares me... </p>\n<p>I am seeing a psychologist (just started) and also doing an online CBT course. The CBT course is helping with my general anxiety, but not with my BP phobia.... yet at least. Oh, I also have a phobia about taking medication, so I am not taking anything yet. However, I do realise that I have to start taking my BP at home so that I can work out if I need to take medication.... I tell myself that if I have to take something for it, then I will have to... and its not that big a deal, but somehow it seems a huge deal and big hurdle for me to get over.</p>\n<p>Last week, I took my BP on 2 consecutive morning. First time on both days it was high. Once I get a high reading I continue taking it until my reading comes down which it did on both those days... to an OK level. And although I felt a little relieved for a while, I still thought about it and worried that it was going up during the day. I will try to take it again this week.</p>\n<p>I wonder if anyone has tried hypnotherapy? Or anything else that might help. I am really finding it difficult to cope with this, no matter how I try to talk to myself in a positive and helpful way the fear peaks though and panic happens.</p></div>", "date": "24-11-2019", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-around-blood-pressure/td-p/474851" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/16871", "content": "<p>There is a thread under Depression just like this so I thought why not start an anxiety one?</p>\n<p>My word is:</p>\n<p>Attacking</p></div>", "date": "12-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/93" }, { "author": "user-id/7009", "content": "<p>Obliterating!!!!</p></div>", "date": "01-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/93" }, { "author": "user-id/1665", "content": "<p>Antisocial</p></div>", "date": "06-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/93" }, { "author": "user-id/48522", "content": "<p>Crippling</p></div>", "date": "06-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/93" }, { "author": "user-id/47893", "content": "<p>Catastrophic</p></div>", "date": "09-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/93" }, { "author": "user-id/48427", "content": "<p>Learning</p></div>", "date": "10-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/93" }, { "author": "user-id/16871", "content": "<p>There is a thread under Depression just like this so I thought why not start an anxiety one?</p>\n<p>My word is:</p>\n<p>Attacking</p></div>", "date": "12-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/16871", "content": "<p> </p>\n<p>so true Lynda. sometimes I'm too scared to bee too happy.</p>\n<p>love your new photo too.</p></div>", "date": "16-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/6954", "content": "Debilitating</div>", "date": "17-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/33820", "content": "<p>Opportunity.</p>\n<p> To grow, to heal, to look after yourself. Wakeup call. </p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: inherit;\">Tracy​</span></p></div>", "date": "20-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/38255", "content": "Frustrating</div>", "date": "23-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/7032", "content": "Noisy.</div>", "date": "07-07-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/37105", "content": "a awkward gift that stops us from having a heart attack</div>", "date": "08-07-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/42371", "content": "<p>Debilitating </p>\n<p>When I have it I just lose all control and become a mess.</p></div>", "date": "08-07-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/36177", "content": "Persistent</div>", "date": "08-07-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/7126", "content": "Hell</div>", "date": "08-07-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/4934", "content": "Suffocating</div>", "date": "08-07-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/16871", "content": "<p>There is a thread under Depression just like this so I thought why not start an anxiety one?</p>\n<p>My word is:</p>\n<p>Attacking</p></div>", "date": "12-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/35549", "content": "Pervasive</div>", "date": "15-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/16871", "content": "<p> </p>\n<p>ageing</p></div>", "date": "15-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/18336", "content": "<p>Controllable!!!</p>\n<p>Now, anyway. But it wasn't for a long time...</p></div>", "date": "15-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/36114", "content": "<p> </p>\n<p> </p>\n<p> Crippling</p></div>", "date": "15-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/35975", "content": "Paracidic</div>", "date": "15-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/36114", "content": "<p> </p>\n<p> </p>\n<p> Irrational</p></div>", "date": "16-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/29198", "content": "Challenging</div>", "date": "16-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/16871", "content": "<p> </p>\n<p>Nagging</p></div>", "date": "16-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/16871", "content": "<p> </p>\n<p>dread</p></div>", "date": "16-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/1155", "content": "<p>Annoying. Just when you think you've got a handle on it, something triggers it.</p>\n<p>Lynda</p></div>", "date": "16-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/16871", "content": "<p>There is a thread under Depression just like this so I thought why not start an anxiety one?</p>\n<p>My word is:</p>\n<p>Attacking</p></div>", "date": "12-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176" }, { "author": "user-id/19638", "content": "Empowering</div>", "date": "12-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176" }, { "author": "user-id/36177", "content": "Nightmare</div>", "date": "12-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176" }, { "author": "user-id/16871", "content": "<p>Hi Pennywise,</p>\n<p>Interesting word choice. Do you mean to say it takes over you or does it make you feel empowered? If so I'd love to hear how.</p>\n<p>Thanks for posting</p>\n<p>CMF</p></div>", "date": "12-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176" }, { "author": "user-id/38255", "content": "My anxiety is....ingrained</div>", "date": "12-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176" }, { "author": "user-id/36177", "content": "Controlling</div>", "date": "12-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176" }, { "author": "user-id/36114", "content": "<p> </p>\n<p> Suffocating</p></div>", "date": "12-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176" }, { "author": "user-id/19638", "content": "<p>Hi CMF.</p>\n<p>I was gonna say \"challenging\" but some days when you're in control and you can manage to quiet your thoughts you do indeed feel empowered. I say \"empowered\" because people with anxiety are still able to live \"normal\" lives (as society would phrase it). They can have relationships, kids, pretty much anything they desire as much as the next person only you have to fight for it harder. That challenge in every day makes you strong. On the days that you feel strong does anyone feel empowered too?</p></div>", "date": "12-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176" }, { "author": "user-id/16871", "content": "<p> </p>\n<p>debilitating</p>\n<p>Yes <strong>Pennywise, </strong>when I don't have anxiety I can take on the world. Sounds like you are turning it around, back on the anxiety ie when it's not present so you're back in control. it's a feeling of satisfaction isn't it?</p>\n<p>cmf</p>\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "13-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176" }, { "author": "user-id/19638", "content": "<p>CMF i also burn up alot of my anxiety while running. Im actually a better runner now than i used to be and enjoy it alot more. I run every day and it really seems to help. </p>\n<p>The fact that you can still go on even though you have anxiety makes you a strong person even though you dont feel like one. </p></div>", "date": "13-06-2016", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/if-you-could-describe-your-anxiety-in-one-word-what-would-it-be/td-p/211176" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48427", "content": "<p>Hi,</p><p>From my darkness came light. A positive posting !!</p><p> </p><p>I started going onto Beyond Blue due to losing my job and feeling very lost. I have suffered anxiety for most of my adult life.  I am currently medicated and have over the years accumulated many valuable tools to deal with this exhausting condition. </p><p>I not only lost my job , I was treated unfairly and become shattered and disillusioned by my life and humans. I lost all self worth and struggled with my existence. I started a journal and worked on keeping my head above water daily. I never gave up , I knew it would never stay the same and that change would come. I applied for countless jobs , had a few interviews. I went for an interview Monday , really enjoyed chatting to the employer, I showed my authentic self. I didn't hold out much hope. I was contacted by the employer yesterday as they wanted to contact my referees. Could I possibly hold out hope ? NO. My referees contacted me with positive vibes after speaking with the employer. Could I possibly hold out hope? NO</p><p>This morning the employer rang me to offer me the position.  I accepted , I was in shock for many hours and found it hard to process. How much of my anxiety has actually taken over my life and sense of worth?  People don't seem to understand what their actions and words can do to another person. Being kind seems to be such a hard action for some. I leave these people behind and will rebuild my self awareness. I have learnt so much during this time, its invaluable. </p><p>Please never give up !!</p><p>T</p></div>", "date": "09-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/break-through-with-stress-and-anxiety/td-p/572066" }, { "author": "user-id/13121", "content": "<p>Hello TDL1968,</p><p> </p><p>Congratulations on your new job…that is awesome and so is your post…It’s a  very inspiring post and I’m sure that your post will give others hope that things do change..</p><p> </p><p>I struggle with anxiety and find it very debilitating a lot of the time…and agree that words and actions can have a very big impact on anyone struggling with this awful illness….</p><p> </p><p>Being kind to one another is one of the most important thing one person can do for another person/s…really we never know what anyone is going through and kind words can lift a person from the depth of despair into a place with a bit of light and hope….</p><p> </p><p>My kindest thoughts a dear TDL1968…thank you so much for a very uplifting, hopeful and inspiring post..</p><p>Grandy..</p></div>", "date": "09-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/break-through-with-stress-and-anxiety/td-p/572066" }, { "author": "user-id/48427", "content": "<p>Lets try to share some light every now and then to offer a different state of mind. Sometimes this forum can be quite dark. xx</p></div>", "date": "09-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/break-through-with-stress-and-anxiety/td-p/572066" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/45371", "content": "<p>Hi was wondering if there are any techniques to help with anxiety I have used the 54321 and breathing exercises and the alphabet but my anxiety/panic attacks come back after a goodnight sleep</p></div>", "date": "11-12-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety/td-p/554365/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/45371", "content": "<p>Ive had a relapse my anxiety is back and I haven't been able to sleep most nights im awake till 3am I've taken 3 different sleep meds and they aren't working  guess no work till I see my dr I hate that my anxiety is back I couldn't even celebrate my birthday </p></div>", "date": "07-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety/td-p/554365/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/16277", "content": "<p>Hi Belieber95,</p><p> </p><p>Thanks for the update. I'm so sorry to hear that your anxiety has reared it's ugly head again. How did you go with the This Way Up program? It might be a good time to go over some of the skills you learned during the course otherwise they become rusty. I remember when I struggled to sleep I would use some of the exercises I found on the calm app. They also have nice ambient noise and music to help people with sleep. There are free versions available online and on youtube. Keep us updated please.</p><p> </p><p>Bob</p></div>", "date": "09-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety/td-p/554365/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/45371", "content": "<p>Hi was wondering if there are any techniques to help with anxiety I have used the 54321 and breathing exercises and the alphabet but my anxiety/panic attacks come back after a goodnight sleep</p></div>", "date": "11-12-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety/td-p/554365" }, { "author": "user-id/16277", "content": "<p>Hi Belieber95,</p><p> </p><p>Welcome to the forum and thanks for your question. Love the username. There are some helpful relaxation techniques for anxiety listed on the beyond blue website here: <a href=\"https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/staying-well/relaxation-exercises\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/staying-well/relaxation-exercises</a> </p><p> </p><p>I have personally benefited from the breathing techniques in the past and have used the calm app. However the calm app is paid and the exercise is pretty much the same as the one I provided a link to. I hope this helps and keep us updated on how you go! <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":blue_heart:\">💙</span></p><p> </p><p>Bob</p></div>", "date": "11-12-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety/td-p/554365" }, { "author": "user-id/45371", "content": "<p>Thanks I have tried a few of those the other day it sort of helped but I'm now trying to see a dr and get professional help </p></div>", "date": "12-12-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety/td-p/554365" }, { "author": "user-id/38654", "content": "<p>Hi there,</p><p> </p><p>Mindfulness usually helps me, but anxiety can make it hard to stay present. You need to learn strategies to challenge the anxious thoughts - have you seen a psychologist about your anxiety? They will recommend the best way to treat your anxiety.</p><p> </p><p>I find apps like \"calm\" and \"smiling mind\" are good too if you need some guided meditation or exercises.</p><p> </p><p>I hope your anxiety improves soon,</p><p>Jaz xx</p></div>", "date": "12-12-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety/td-p/554365" }, { "author": "user-id/16277", "content": "<p>Hi Belieber95,</p><p> </p><p>Thanks for the update! Great to hear that you will be seeing a doctor shortly. Hopefully they can refer to you a mental health worker for cognitive behavioural therapy. Please keep us updated on how you're going.</p><p> </p><p>Bob</p></div>", "date": "13-12-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety/td-p/554365" }, { "author": "user-id/44836", "content": "<p>Hey! </p><p>I have named my anxiety. His name is Pedro.</p><p>He can be quite the annoyance, and pop up when i really do not want him too.</p><p>My technique (and i do realise its not for everyone) is to put him in a box, shut the lid and push it into a corner.</p><p>You can always visualise other things, such as telling your anxiety to be quiet.</p><p>Seeing your doctor as you mentioned is great. They can refer you to someone to get some stratgies in place and explore methods that work for you.</p><p>Let us know how you go.</p><p>Jx </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "13-12-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety/td-p/554365" }, { "author": "user-id/45371", "content": "<p>I'm doing better there is this site called This way up it helps with anxiety too and I can't see a counsellor until January </p></div>", "date": "21-12-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety/td-p/554365" }, { "author": "user-id/16277", "content": "<p>Hi Belieber95,</p><p> </p><p>Thanks for the update and I'm glad to hear you're doing a bit better. I used that website too! I did the course on mixed depression and anxiety and found it very useful. It takes a few months but is well worth it so I can recommend it. I pretty out each lesson so that I can flick back to it when I need it. Sorry to hear you can't see a counsellor till Jan. It is a tough time of year. Both my psychologist and psychiatrist are on leave till Feb. Hopefully  you can fill that time with using some of the techniques you learn in lesson one of the this way up program. <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span></p><p> </p><p>Bob</p></div>", "date": "27-12-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety/td-p/554365" }, { "author": "user-id/40334", "content": "<p>Hi Belieber95</p><p> </p><p>Wondering whether the sleep factor is a trigger, based on what you write. Do you know exactly <em>how</em> you're sleeping? For example, if you're facing sleep with sleep apnea, sleep apnea can be a trigger for anxiety. On the other hand, if sleep is highly recharging, do you <em>feel</em> the recharge as <em>hyper</em> activity when waking? Is there some need to relax that kind of activity or perhaps channel it into some form of morning routine that'll discharge some of the energy? Do you tend to dream a lot (nightmares included), which impacts your nervous system while you're sleeping? Can you perhaps <em>feel</em> the impact on your nervous system when you wake up? Maybe you're going to sleep with stressful thoughts, the same thoughts you're waking up with. So, it's as though there's been no <em>conscious</em> break between thoughts. I know I ask a lot of questions but I can't help but wonder where it is that a constructive difference could begin for you.</p><p> </p><p>I feel for you so very much as you begin each day under great stress.</p></div>", "date": "30-12-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety/td-p/554365" }, { "author": "user-id/40334", "content": "<p>Hi JED1980</p><p> </p><p>I like that, naming your anxiety. Highly constructive. I think I shall name mine 'Dawn'. She typically surfaces when I'm on the dawn of much needed change (<em>out</em> of intensely stressful life factors) or on the dawn of some revelation that leads me to waking up to exactly what it is that's leading me to anxiety. Hope that makes sense. Dawn is a serious stresser and she can sense anything stressful/anxiety inducing. While helpful in pointing things out, leading me to become more conscious, the need to put that part of me in a box and perhaps say 'Let's address this together later' is definitely a need that's felt at times. Compartmentalising is a tough one to master, that's for sure. Your tips and wisdom are much appreciated. Your perspective is deeply valued <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span></p></div>", "date": "30-12-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety/td-p/554365" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/13331", "content": "<p style=\"text-align: -webkit-auto;\"><span style=\"background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0); font-family: arial, sans-serif;\">Hi there,</span></p>\n<p style=\"text-align: -webkit-auto;\"><span style=\"background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0); font-family: arial, sans-serif;\">I heard Beyond Blue advertised on the radio today and I decided to go to their website and that has led me to joining the online community. Does anyone out there have health anxiety? I have had it for as long as I can remember and to be honest in it's early days I managed it very well and even now feel that my case is mild as I have learned to manage it as best as I can myself but I am always interested in other peoples ways of coping and maybe I might be able to help someone out there with how I have taught myself to manage this.</span></p>\n<p style=\"text-align: -webkit-auto;\"><span style=\"background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0); font-family: arial, sans-serif;\">To be honest, in my case I don't stress over every illness or disease that there is. My main anxiety is with cancer, mainly breast cancer. I have no explanation why, it's just something that I stress over. I don't go to the doctor every 5 minutes and have set myself strict rules on checking myself and doubting myself all the time. I have done my own research and sourced some good information over the internet on management techniques and how you can overcome negative thoughts which have helped me but regulary I keep second guessing myself, like for eg. I only check my breasts one a month and then once I've checked them I doubt myself and say \"maybe I've missed something\". I do refrain myself from checking them again because one thing I have learned is if you repeat this checking behaviour it helps in the short term but then you doubt yourself again and so the cycle starts over. I asked my doctor to send me off the an ultrasound to make sure nothing is wrong and he knows that I struggle with the \"girls\" lol.</span></p>\n<p style=\"text-align: -webkit-auto;\"><span style=\"background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0); font-family: arial, sans-serif;\">Anyway, I believe that with anxiety especially OCD related anxiety and I think health anxiety falls into that category as it's repetitive behaviour it's very important to follow the techniques to help you manage and hopefully cure the anxiety. Although I have told my husband how I get and he is understanding, I tend to keep this subject to myself and when it kicks in try and follow my manage system.</span></p>\n<p style=\"text-align: -webkit-auto;\"><span style=\"background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0); font-family: arial, sans-serif;\">Although I don't think I will ever be rid of it totally, of late I have decided that instead of fighting it and always wanting to make these thoughts totally go away and all the time I would fail at that. Lately for me it's about management with my feelings and if you can get a good balance of that things will be ok.</span></p>\n<p style=\"text-align: -webkit-auto;\"><span style=\"background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0); font-family: arial, sans-serif;\">I will say that one thing that has stuck in my mind with my findings about health anxiety,</span></p>\n<p style=\"text-align: -webkit-auto;\"><span style=\"background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0); font-family: arial, sans-serif;\">\"If you can accept uncertainty, your worries will go away, as soon as you fight uncertainty your worries will stay\". Everybody has uncertainty in their life its the way we handle it which can make a difference.</span></p>\n<p style=\"text-align: -webkit-auto;\"><span style=\"background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0); font-family: arial, sans-serif;\"> </span></p></div>", "date": "06-05-2013", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety/td-p/37072" }, { "author": "user-id/46594", "content": "<p>Hello Buckley yes I know what you mean and I can relate to your anxiety health related anxiety is so horrible, one of the many things I dislike about it is how I feel it takes up so much space in my head and my day to day and I know in my heart for no real good reason! <br>I had the breast cancer issue for a little while also / then it was lung cancer and lately it’s liver concerns and stomach and I just do the things I have to to get peace of mind - whether that’s a biopsy or a blood test- I just get it done. And also I have a great therapist and even though she doesn’t fix it with a click of her fingers, I do feel better for a little while at least and that provides some relief in the cycle. <br>I use a lot of the usual techniques for panic and anxiety - breathing distraction light exercise tapping so on, the best for me is ice packs or anything cold on my body or dunking face in ice water. But the health anxiety is more of a battle. The therapy is really essential for that, and learning to manage it out as opposed to wanting to just make it go away altogether although I wish it would! <br>good luck with everything x </p></div>", "date": "09-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety/td-p/37072" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/46484", "content": "<p>I have found the longer my anxiety has been in my life the more it's affected my gut, I have had blood tests, urine tests and ultra sounds and seen a specialist nothing has ever been found to be abnormal, just wondering if anyone else goes through this it's almost like anxiety has given me some form of IBS. Thank you for reading hope to hear from others.</p></div>", "date": "03-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/does-anxiety-give-you-burps/td-p/571599" }, { "author": "user-id/40334", "content": "<p>Hi Scott_O</p><p> </p><p>I'm wondering if you've ever been led to research 'Gut-Brain Axis'. It's a pretty interesting topic and covers <em>the</em> <em>relationship</em> between the the gut and the brain and how mental health aspects tie into things, such as with anxiety and depression. Sometimes it can be a matter of 'chickens and eggs'. Which came first, the gut issues or the anxiety? So incredibly frustrating when you're looking for answers no one's been able to give you so far. Don't give up the search. I'm a gal who's a big believer in there being a reason for everything <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span></p></div>", "date": "04-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/does-anxiety-give-you-burps/td-p/571599" }, { "author": "user-id/48452", "content": "<p>hey there,</p><p>I’ve struggled with anxiety for practically most of my life and yes anxiety can definitely lead to some digestive issues hence the burping… everyone’s bodies react differently to anxiety personally for me I get lots of stomache aches and it’s rlly hard for me to digest and poop so it’s all completely normal what ur experiencing <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span> hope that helps </p></div>", "date": "04-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/does-anxiety-give-you-burps/td-p/571599" }, { "author": "user-id/45371", "content": "<p>I have had high anxiety since December from having long covid I've been on and off work since end of January due to being unwell in the gut and now this past week my anxiety has come back and I can't seem to sleep I've tried 3 different meds and nothing is working I get where you are coming from it's hard to get a handle on it</p></div>", "date": "07-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/does-anxiety-give-you-burps/td-p/571599" }, { "author": "user-id/38654", "content": "<p>hi there scott,</p><p> </p><p>anxiety can definitely manifest in physical ways, especially within the gut. it's good that you have had testing done and nothing is abnormal, but when you are anxious it can upset the equilibrium in your body.</p><p> </p><p>doing meditations usually helps me stay out of stress, and maybe seeing a psychologist would be helpful for you as well.</p><p> </p><p>i hope this helps,</p><p>jaz xx</p></div>", "date": "07-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/does-anxiety-give-you-burps/td-p/571599" }, { "author": "user-id/46594", "content": "<p>Hello Scott, </p><p>yes I find it definitely can impact the way our guy and stomach feels- just like when you might feel a</p><p>tightness in your ribs or sometimes even back pain can seem to go hand in hand with anxiety. <br>For me the symptoms are usually a very hard bloated area so I suspect a bit of blockage through the colon and so on and of course when you experience the discomfort it can really ramp up the negative thinking and pull you into a longer cycle of anxiety and heavy over thinking. <br>I too have had blood tests and EKG and scans with no real results so I understand your worries and frustration. <br>I found a good therapist and even though it doesn’t last forever the relief I feel after a session helps push back the next episode for me - good luck on your journey x </p></div>", "date": "09-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/does-anxiety-give-you-burps/td-p/571599" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48315", "content": "Hello I am new to the group. My name is Shelly. I have contacted beyond blue on a few occasions when I have been really struggling and they have suggested that I join the forms for support. I have suffered with medical anxiety and OCD symptoms since childhood and the last 12 months has been a roller coaster. I experienced a traumatic incident that happened at work and it led to panic attacks and extremely high levels of anxiety. I am seeing a psychologist and a psychiatrist and I’ve just had my medication increased. I have seen some improvements, but seem to be still having quite a few periods of feeling not great. I have been off work on wet cover for quite some time and it just feels like this is a never ending battle. I would really like to hear from people that have found a way to get their life back on track after having, a long period of a struggle. Thank you to anyone who takes the time to read my message.  </div>", "date": "19-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/wanting-to-talk-to-other-people-that-i-have-found-ways-to-deal/td-p/570638" }, { "author": "user-id/19707", "content": "<p>Hi, welcome</p><p> </p><p>I've been a past workcover inquiry agent, been on workcover for 10 months for a work related claim and am experienced in this area. My work injury was a psychological one, so rehabilitation is different than physical and doctors are the one to monitor recovery.</p><p> </p><p>However, if it helps I'll mention some factors that could assist in such recovery from a lived experience viewpoint.</p><p> </p><p>Long term on compensation is not helpful generally unless of course you cant recover enough. In my case 10 months off work from my management of a Govt department trying to corrupt me and turn blind eye to illegal activity was enough to send me into trauma. After 9 months off it was time to re-enter the workforce and choose a far different career path which was the best advice I could ever get. So I went from quasi law enforcement to supervisor of disabled people in a sheltered workshop. </p><p> </p><p>However, time often does help heal us enough to put aside the trauma of the situation and find positivity to move on, that timeframe depends on the individual, as grief does, so dont be rushed but develop your urges to improve your life by thinking ahead in a productive manner. I had one big panic attack at the time of my injury (incorrectly diagnosed as heart attack!), I also had bipolar, depression etc undiagnosed at the time.</p><p> </p><p>Being on Workcover can be many things, demoralising, stress from paperwork, claims officer pressure, legal support, off work when perpetrators have done the harm (and keep working) and the effects upon ones family and friends further harms us. Insurance companies also engage investigators like I was to ascertain you arent working (double dipping income) but they are purely fact seeking to find out your capacity to do things you claim you cant carry out and seek out fraud. All these stresses places you in a more anxious situation that I fully understand.</p><p> </p><p>So my advice to you is take the required time to recover to the point where you feel recovered enough to seek out a new base of employment. Dont be afraid to change careers, think outside the square like home business or part time work, maybe 2 part time jobs even. Acknowledge that long term workcover can be counter productive, it isnt the answer toward your best interests. Seek out soothing additions to your life like a pet, hobbies, sports (barracking) and activities with friends, attend comedies, movies and a coffee at a cafe. It all has to do with a balance of these activities.</p><p> </p><p>Insurance companies are not interested in actively assisting you with rehabilitation. Your GP has the ultimate power to return you to work and will monitor you in that regard. There is Govt departments and schemes that can assist you in a new career etc so attend centrelink or online.</p><p> </p><p>You might consider to give yourself the greatest chance of a good life and this hiccup is not unlike several ones you could experience in your lifetime. Sometimes there is a light at the end of the tunnel but is too far away for us to see it.</p><p> </p><p>Any further questions please repost.</p><p> </p><p>TonyWK</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "20-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/wanting-to-talk-to-other-people-that-i-have-found-ways-to-deal/td-p/570638" }, { "author": "user-id/48315", "content": "<p>Thank you so much for your advice</p></div>", "date": "05-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/wanting-to-talk-to-other-people-that-i-have-found-ways-to-deal/td-p/570638" }, { "author": "user-id/43559", "content": "<p>Hi Shelly </p><p> </p><p>im the same been off work for a while on work cover, i have psychological/ &amp; physical injuries which has healed the mind not so much , I’m much like u in a state of when does this end I tried to go back to work my mental health deteriorated so badly after a abusive encounter with my return to work co ordinator really set me back a lot and have to resettle myself and decide whether I go back to the hell hole that is my job ( I do love my work but the sheer toxic nature of the people in charge is unbearable) but it’s good money it’s like we’ll do o go back suffer for the cash and leave when a better job comes by or go rehabilitation to work thru work cover it’s soo hard to try to recover again and learn to trust anyone again after all that’s happened </p></div>", "date": "06-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/wanting-to-talk-to-other-people-that-i-have-found-ways-to-deal/td-p/570638" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/47740", "content": "<p>There are times in everyones life where they face adversity and difficulties and sometimes you feel sad and upset and question why is this hapening to me. Beleive me I have been there many times with my own disabilties.</p><p> </p><p>You must always have hope in your heart that things will always work out . </p><p> </p><p>Sometimes the path you walk will be difficult but remember your friends and your family are always there to look after you. Then there is the community around you that is there to support you for whatever you might need. </p><p> </p><p>At time I was scared to face my condition and what I was going through but I never walked that path alone I had my family my friends and the friendly doctors to guide so I was never alone. You must find the strength with in yourself to say I will stand up to my adversities and not let this defeat me. I am going to stand against the tide and face my difficulties and do it with the love and support of my family and friend.</p><p> </p><p>I have been in a situation where I personally faced my health issues so I have been there myself</p><p> </p><p>You have to find the inner strength to not give up and climb the mountain with your friends and family to guide you. You need to find that candle in the darkness to lead you to a safe happy place and always think positive powerful thoughts and figure out what things make me happy what brings you peace and calm what helps you to heal. You must not have fear you must try and have hope and love instead.</p><p> </p><p>Love is a very powerful thing it brings great power of hope and resilance.Light a candle and bring hope into the world and into your life. The power you need is in your heart and in your mind and you have the power to change and look forward to a more powerful positive future only you have the internal strength to change your life for the better.</p><p> </p><p>With the guidance from your family, friends and doctors you have your team to help guide and protect you through your difficulties.</p><p> </p><p>You must say to yourself I am powerful beyond measure.</p><p>I am brillant and I can face my challengers and come out on the other side.</p><p> </p><p>You must remain positive and say what do I need to do to help myself get out of how Im feeling. I will tell you what I use to help myself. I use meditation, reading, cycling, cooking and gardening . You find what makes you happy and what brings you back to calm and peace. Everybody has there own thing that helps them recover. You have to find the activity that helps you out of your difficulties.</p><p> </p><p>The journey is long and sometime never easy but remember you never walk alone and you must never feel alone there are always people to help guide and protect you. </p><p> </p><p>Do you think froddo and harry potter did it alone they always had help on there journey they always had help like you have your family and friends and the doctors. You mustn't be scared because you. You must walk your journey and not be scared because you are powerful beyond measure.   </p><p> </p><p>The main story in this is you are powerful you are strong and you must have hope with in yourself. The candle is the symbolism of that hope and the candle bring light and positivity into the world.</p><p> </p><p>Stand up to your challengers by creating hope and love through the power of the candle.</p><p> </p><p>I hope everyone share the love and joy with there families and share great hugs with your love ones</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "01-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/to-face-challengers-and-rise-to-the-adversity-and-overcome/td-p/571486" }, { "author": "user-id/40334", "content": "<p>Hi Elephant86</p><p> </p><p>As usual, your words and encouragement are inspiring. Finding someone to hold the light for us when we're in the darkness is definitely key to managing those dark parts of our path. I wish there were more light bearers and guides in this world. They can be so hard to find at times. My heart always goes out to those who are struggling in the dark without family or friends or with somewhat broken systems that are set up in a way that lead people to a greater sense of loneliness and hopelessness. Sometimes it saddens me to think of how this world works in some ways. Then there are times where I feel so inspired by people such as yourself, those who know of hardship, pain and challenge, who go on to light the path for others. You are a blessing in this world. You radiate love, kindness, compassion and so much more <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":sun_with_face:\">🌞</span><span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":red_heart:\">❤️</span></p></div>", "date": "06-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/to-face-challengers-and-rise-to-the-adversity-and-overcome/td-p/571486" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48476", "content": "<p>Okay I don't know how to start this just going to dive right in.</p><p> </p><p>I am posting in hopes to hear of similar stories and advice to help. I am about to depart to the USA from AU to stay with my mother in law for 6 weeks. Last time we met she lived with us for 6weeks and the whole time was pure tension because she wanted to control and change our brand new house. She did not like that I had a day and stood up to her saying we like our house the way it is and my wife and I are decorating at our own pace. There was a lot of guilting going on between her and my wife because my wife had chosen to live in the other side of the world and that \"was like a limb being torn off\" for her mum. She would say her days are all dark and gloomy when she is away from her daughter to our faces nearly every second day. We know for a fact she is happy when she is back in USA because we call her every second week.</p><p>I would stand up to her knowing she was only making her daughter (my wife) depressed by not communicating in a healthy way. And I would ask her to communicate it in a kinder way. </p><p>She did not like me doing this and no matter how calm I was she would over react.</p><p>The worst part is to come. After all 6weeks we were back in the USA with her for one week before we got to go have some time for ourselves. My wife was driving on the right for the first time in a year (her mum refused to drive) so we asked her to keep quiet there would be a lot of concentration involved and I was helping with directions in a foreign country. It eventually came to her talking and I politely said \"yes that's great but let's just be quiet like agreed there is a lot going on right now\" well she did not like that and kept on chattering saying she has already said it so what do I want her to do. Well between my wife chiming in making things louder, the little sleep after traveling for 36hours and being on the opposite side of the road helping my wife drive I lost it. I yelled. I screamed \"SHUT UP!\". I lost it, I was triggered. I was immediately apologetic and trying to explain.</p><p>She was offended and didn't want to hear it. Which I though was reasonable, we can talk later. 5days went past and I tried talking on multiple occasions. My mother in law spent the whole time complaining to her friends how awful I was. It came to our final departure and I got her asside to give a huge soeach about how awful it was of me to over react that way and I never wanted to do it again. Unfortunately I made the mistake of exaggerating my point in a hope that she would say no I was not that bad. I said I was a monster for the way I acted and she said \"yes you were\" and I don't think I can ever forgive you. </p><p>To this day I have asked a few times if things between us could be forgiven and she refuses to let this happen.</p><p>It is clear I need to move on and forgive myself and not expect her forgiveness.</p><p> </p><p>But now I am about to go live with her for 6weeks and I don't know if I can handle it. Hotels are not an option because she lives in Boston (super expensive we can't afford it) and unless we live so far away we can't afford a hotel. I don't want to do that either because I don't want my wife missing out on valuable time.</p><p>I feel trapped.</p><p>Advice?</p><p>Thank you <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":red_heart:\">❤️</span></p></div>", "date": "02-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/6-weeks-with-mother-in-law/td-p/571538" }, { "author": "user-id/2579", "content": "<p>The way I see it, you can either continue to dwell on the past (irrespective of apportioning blame or guilt), or clean the slate by releasing the memory and yourself from the negative encounter that MIL is relishing more from the control it affords her over you than any significant umbrage caused - it's simply a power thing and your squirming only empowers the behaviour.<br>Just be positive and charming for you are her guest and some deference is sort of mandatory; plus you would be wise remembering it is more for your wife that you are making this sacrifice.<br>However, if you feel the need, make plans for wife and mother to spend some quality time together while you go off exploring - they would probably welcome the chance for a heart to heart without company anyway (you do realise you may not be the apple of MILs eye!).<br>Once she sees you are not affected by her petulance, the game will end (until finding some new entertainment to her amusement) - such is the extent we go to for love, huh?</p><p>That said, being considerate to any actual, implied, or unintended hurt, it is important for MIL to have her say if it satisfies her to do so. All you need to do is acknowledge how she feels and this should help mend that bridge over time.</p></div>", "date": "02-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/6-weeks-with-mother-in-law/td-p/571538" }, { "author": "user-id/40334", "content": "<p>Hi Xando33</p><p> </p><p>Definitely sounds like a stressful situation, going to stay with someone who you can easily <em>feel</em> doesn't like you. The fact that you're willing to do this for your wife speaks volumes when it comes to the sort of person you are.</p><p> </p><p>I can't help but wonder how your wife has managed her mum's behaviour in the past. Is it kind of like 'No, I can't say that to my mum, it'll upset her and she'll get angry with me and I don't want the stress' and <em>you</em> act as her knight in shining armour? Perhaps her mum's behaviour is more so like water off a duck's back for her. She doesn't see all that much of a problem with it and easily ignores it. I think how <em>she</em> sees it will play a part in how it's managed, as I think it's partly your wife's responsibility to manage her mum's behaviour.</p><p> </p><p>To be honest, I'm not entirely sure I could do what you're about to do for 6 whole weeks. I'm not sure how well my nervous system or mind would cope. Call me selfish but I think it's really important that we give great consideration to our physical and mental health. In some ways our partner can help play a positive part in that. When I think about my in laws, they are such incredibly kind and generous people but what I really struggle with is the level of racism they feel comfortable in expressing. While my husband and I live in Melbourne and they live in a another state, I'd spoken to him some time ago about how incredibly uncomfortable it made me feel when we'd all spend weeks at a time together. I tolerated it for years until I just couldn't anymore. I asked him to speak to them. At first he wouldn't because he loves being the golden child. Eventually he spoke to them. His mum had a pretty good filter but his dad found it a good laugh to taunt me with the occasional racist comment. The times we went to stay with them for a couple of weeks, I'd beg my husband for us to have a few days to our selves first but always got 'No, I want to stay with them the whole time. They're my parents and I miss them'. Seeing this is the only type of holiday we'd ever have together, it would end in fights, as I'd fight for the time to have a tiny holiday interstate that <em>didn't</em> involve some level of dread. My husband flat out refused to seriously address the issue. While I may sound a little delicate, keep in mind my brother's wife is Chinese, my sister's son is part Italian, one of my friends is aboriginal and I'd spent my whole childhood being conditioned to <em>not</em> tolerate a level of racism you can really <em>feel</em> on so many levels. The most important thing though involves the fact I would resolve an issue with <em>my</em> family if it was something that tormented my husband to such a degree.</p><p> </p><p>I think there's a time where people have got to step up and act or speak on our behalf in a way that can productively resolve tension. While it may prove a challenge for them, it remains <em>their</em> challenge. If they refuse to accept and manage that challenge, an undeniable problem remains. After about 25 years of having known my husband's family, I simply won't tolerate what my husband refuses to seriously address and having grown a little less tolerant over the years, I know would no longer be able to contain my feelings. Words would be said. I simply choose to no longer visit, for everyone's sake. I know I sound harsh but I can think of much happier ways to spend a holiday. A somewhat dreadful (dread filled) holiday is not an enjoyable one, that's for sure. How is your wife prepared to manage things, so that it's not a dreadful holiday for <em>you</em>?</p></div>", "date": "06-08-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/6-weeks-with-mother-in-law/td-p/571538" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/19766", "content": "<p>Since I was 18, I had an anxiety develop around a deep fear of being home alone at night. </p><p> </p><p>8 years on and it still prevails my life. </p><p> </p><p>I recently moved from a share house to alone, knowing this anxiety would be a tough one to beat. However, I am just finding it so exhausting. I am convinced with every bone in my body that something is going to happen to me the minute it goes past 11 o clock or I am trying to sleep. Any noise I hear, I think it is a person, despite usually just being the fridge or whatever, constant intrusive thoughts of someone scarying me, or waiting for me behind the door. I am so so tired of it, I don't recognise the person I become. </p><p> </p><p>Does anyone else relate to phobias in general or night time stuff? I feel so alone. </p></div>", "date": "31-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-when-home-alone-over-night/td-p/571447" }, { "author": "user-id/43559", "content": "<p>Hi lill-b</p><p> </p><p>I think it’s normal to be scared a bit ( I get scared walking alone in my local spooky forest Reserve ( big spot goes 4 miles ) also terrified of kangaroos , dogs, magpies, various things. <br><br></p><p>Is this your first time living alone ?give it time it may go away ,or seek counseling,?  or perhaps get to know ur neighbours that might help if u know ur not entirely alone, I have had periods of phobias but not so much in my house @ night ,my house kinda sets off a bit of anxiety during the day at the moment ,just u know the dread of if my phone might ring , receive a email these things trigger me at the moment my house used to be my safe space but is kinda sorta not anymore due to things in my life but they can change if I move and it’s not a huge issue but these things can become a issue if left unresolved. Do u feel safe in ur area ur living in ? Do u know ur triggers of what is actually scaring u ? Is it just being alone ? Perhaps look deeper into why ur feeling scared / phobias / name it then slowly tackle each fear /each phobia / do u know why u fear being / living alone   ? These are questions to ask urself: maybe start a journal of why / how ur feeling and go from there / try relaxing b4 bed like reading having light relaxing music on while sleeping: those things can help even sleeping with a light on can help I do that if I get scared as I live in a bit of a rough area lots of fights ect so if that starts up I sleep with the hallway light on no Shame in it for me it helps . Have u tried these things? </p></div>", "date": "31-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/phobia-when-home-alone-over-night/td-p/571447" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/46326", "content": "<p>Feeling alone, blank ,lost,cry and just can't think, feel like I'm hurting but I'm not , these feeling come in waves for no reason . I hate feeling that way , I wont I stop and never show up again<span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":loudly_crying_face:\">😭</span></p><p> </p><p>Please help thankyou </p></div>", "date": "22-02-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-alone/td-p/559558" }, { "author": "user-id/44771", "content": "<p>Hi Twinklestar</p><p> </p><p><span>I’m only just starting my own recovery so I’m not sure how best to help, but I wanted to let you know that I read your post and I am here if you want to talk. </span><span>Can you tell us a little more about what is going on?</span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>I know what it feels like to be blank, lost and sad for no reason. Sometimes there is no reason and that’s ok. The pressure of feeling like you need to justify a feeling often seems to make things worse, or at least that’s my experience.</p><p><br>I’m also slowly realising maybe there are reasons that I just wasn’t aware of - for me personally, I’ve realised that I’m very critical of myself so I’ve started trying to practice being being kinder to myself.</p><p> </p><p><br>G</p></div>", "date": "23-02-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-alone/td-p/559558" }, { "author": "user-id/48427", "content": "<p>Hi ,</p><p>First and foremost , you are not alone. Many of us in this forum resonate with what you are feeling. Secondly never try and compare yourself with anyone else. You are a very special individual with very real emotional responses. I felt alone and shattered, and endured most of how you are feeling. My days are still tough , the couple of things I have found helpful are , be honest with yourself , keep talking through your journey, start a journal of feeling , in this journal be honest and look at things around you , write it down , it doesn't have to make sense. Your journal is a private place , for you only. Have a look at the Mindfulness page , some really simple things for you to do for yourself.</p><p>Take small steps. You have already taken a step in the right direction, well done. Welcome to where kindred people meet.</p><p>T</p><p> </p></div>", "date": "31-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-alone/td-p/559558" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48444", "content": "<p>Hi, this is my first time ever doing something like this. Lately, I have been struggling with what emotion I'm supposed to feel. I cry without knowing why I'm crying or breaking down. I get anxiety tics, I've been getting some really bad intrusive thoughts and I don't feel normal. Lately I just space out for long periods of time not thinking about anything, just a blank stare on my face.</p></div>", "date": "31-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/everything-seems-wrong-with-me/td-p/571402" }, { "author": "user-id/48427", "content": "<p>Hi,</p><p>Please know you have connected with me. Put your feet to the floor , I am here and very real.</p><p>Let me share a piece of information once shared with me.</p><p>Like a goose bump that appears on your skin when you are cold , your body is closing to support your coldness and keeping the warmth in. </p><p>When you are feeling overwhelmed and your heart , soul and mind is struggling your body will also close down and disengage to support you. I hope this makes sense too you. I have felt this before , your body is putting up a protective shield and removing you for a while until it is ready to face life again.</p><p>I would really like it if you would continue to talk with me.</p></div>", "date": "31-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/everything-seems-wrong-with-me/td-p/571402" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48329", "content": "<p>I am finding it hard to regulate my moods with anxiety triggered every time I perceive a pressure physically from a procedure I had recently.  Even after having my specialist reassure me that all is normal and ok.  I also feel grief at not being able to spend time with my young grandson that lives in Sydney.  I am not sure whether the two issues are resulting in this awful anxiety and loss of interest in my usual activities.  I do exercise and eat a healthy diet.  I feel good after swimming but it only lasts a couple of hours.  Then the whole dreaded feelings return.</p><p>I have tried a few psychologists but does not seem to help much.  In fact I become more anxious having to talk to them.  I am feeling like there does not seem much point in anything.  Like I am not useful.</p><p>Sad Jane</p></div>", "date": "21-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety/td-p/570702" }, { "author": "user-id/48331", "content": "<p>Hi Soukjane I can relate. My anxiety was first triggered by a neck injury 5 years ago and I get triggered every time I get a twinge in the area, even if I know it's not the old injury. I don't know that I have any good advice, but if our brains can do these things to us I have to believe that we can teach our brains not to. Can you talk to your GP about whether medication might be appropriate?</p></div>", "date": "21-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety/td-p/570702" }, { "author": "user-id/48335", "content": "<p>Hey Soukjane. Im fairly new here myself and can relate to the health anxiety dilemma. I’ve had anxiety on and off for the better part of my life and I thought I’d been managing pretty well until the last 6 months, I’ve started getting heart palpitations for no apparent reason. I’ve had all the relevant tests which suggest nothing serious, but in the last week the anxiety (and in turn palpitations) have gotten quite overwhelming. I don’t know if any of these suggestions will help as im still navigating anxiety myself, but there are some great anxiety books out there and mindful meditation apps that you can get on your phone. I’ve started journaling and writing down my fears and the facts vs fiction thoughts which I found helped calm me a bit, seeing it on paper helped me realise how unsubstantiated some of my fears were. Hope this helps, even if just a little.</p></div>", "date": "22-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety/td-p/570702" }, { "author": "user-id/48329", "content": "<p>Thankyou for your suggestions it really helps to know I am not alone</p></div>", "date": "22-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety/td-p/570702" }, { "author": "user-id/48329", "content": "<p>Thankyou for your reply you are right we can train our brain to not react but it does take time I have had episodes previously and time and change of environment helped.  It did take nearly a year though.  Patience I guess and determination.</p></div>", "date": "22-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety/td-p/570702" }, { "author": "user-id/48312", "content": "<p>Always remember, you are never alone. </p></div>", "date": "23-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety/td-p/570702" }, { "author": "user-id/1665", "content": "<p>Soukjane,</p><p> </p><p>Thank you for opening up to us here, and we warmly welcome you to our forums.</p><p> </p><p>I too have health anxiety, it doesn't matter how small my symptoms are, I will always worry that they represent something bigger and more sinister. </p><p> </p><p>May I ask, if you are able to answer it, what specifically do you feel most anxious about? Is it about symptoms you may have and what they mean, or is it about future health problems, or perhaps about the experience itself of visiting a doctor or psychologist? Or is it perhaps anxiety surrounding potential problems following on from your procedure? Getting to the root of what may be causing your anxiety is a good first step in recognising how you may be able to overcome or manage it. There are different potential solutions or coping strategies depending on this factor.</p><p> </p><p>You've mentioned here that swimming tends to help for a few hours, then the good feeling fades away. Exercising releases happy hormones, which would be what is causing your dread to return after you've stopped swimming. You could always take five minutes to have a walk, or even do a few star jumps, something active to get those happy hormones flowing again.</p><p> </p><p>You can always chat with us some more if you'd like, we're here to support you.</p><p> </p><p>Take care, SB</p></div>", "date": "23-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety/td-p/570702" }, { "author": "user-id/48329", "content": "<p>Hi</p><p>Thankyou for your reply.  I think it's about post procedure that I will not ever feel relief or stop focussing on it.</p><p>Cheers</p><p>Jane</p><p> </p></div>", "date": "24-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety/td-p/570702" }, { "author": "user-id/1665", "content": "<p>Jane,</p><p> </p><p>I had a procedure done a few months ago where I was very anxious before and also for a little while after. Social support was one of my biggest helping factors for the post-procedure anxiety, with the people around me offering me words of comfort and support.</p><p> </p><p>I would also follow exactly what the doctor has told you to do, or not do in some cases. For me, I was told to keep off my feet for a few weeks following my procedure and to keep my leg elevated. Following their recommendations and instructions can ensure you the best chance of recovering as quickly and smoothly as possible.</p><p> </p><p>Hope this can help a little more.</p><p> </p><p>SB</p></div>", "date": "30-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety/td-p/570702" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Hi and best wishes to everyone.  I know that there are people doing it so much harder than me. But i just feel defeated at the moment.  Im just so lonely and i miss my ex partner so much and i know i have to move on .I started a new job that i was going well at but i couldnt go in on Wednesday and i feel really bad about it. Im sick of fighting this battle and im tired from it. Just how much do i have to go through . Im sorry to be on such a downer but i dont know where to turn to at the moment.    If i break it down im lonely and scared.</p><p>I wish every one a good day .   Brett.</p><p> </p></div>", "date": "01-10-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/7" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Hi Ham and others</p><p>I managed to get somewhere with centrelink  so at least an achievement there. </p><p>Been a bit up and down ,  I was at my football club on the weekend it was a good day except for the behaviour of some people towards the opposition.   This upsets me as i want my club to be a positive place. Not one that has the ugly parent sindrome .    </p><p>I admit i am feeling stressed about this.   </p><p>My best  wishes  to everyone.        Brett</p></div>", "date": "27-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/7" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Hi and best wishes.</p><p>I wish i didnt have to feel this way.   Im really struggling and scared  about my future.   I am slowly eating into my savings and my  mortgage redraw.   Im just so scared of becoming broke and losing everything. Im just scared about my future.        Best wishes   Brett.</p></div>", "date": "04-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/7" }, { "author": "user-id/3340", "content": "<p>hey Beaser</p><p>Been a while mate - life has caught me in a moment of peace right now so it's nice to be back</p><p> </p><p>I think many are struggling financially. I know that isn't much of a counsel to you at all. But I guess it's a sign that you are not alone. Many people I am close to are finding it hard, some are retrenched, some are moving back in the family home with their folks. Some are even calling it quits altogether and have the benefit of being able to go to other countries (dual citizens). </p><p> </p><p>The good news is that there are systems in place for us if we ever fall into strife financially or employment-wise. </p><p> </p><p>I am digging into my savings more than I should. THis is something I hope to remedy by side hustles for work but I may well not have the time to do that. </p><p> </p><p>I am unsure what my advice is here my friend. I am only 29 after all. <br><br>I think that the fear you have is perfectly rational though my friend. No shame in admitting that. </p></div>", "date": "23-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/7" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Thank you Ham.</p><p>I am  very appreciative of your  reply , you mention about being 29 you certainly  have a mature and wise  mind. And i do value all you talk  of.</p><p>Im sorry mate, that at 29 you have your battles i hope you  are going ok.</p><p>Always here      </p><p>Brett</p></div>", "date": "25-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/7" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Hi and best wishes to everyone.  I know that there are people doing it so much harder than me. But i just feel defeated at the moment.  Im just so lonely and i miss my ex partner so much and i know i have to move on .I started a new job that i was going well at but i couldnt go in on Wednesday and i feel really bad about it. Im sick of fighting this battle and im tired from it. Just how much do i have to go through . Im sorry to be on such a downer but i dont know where to turn to at the moment.    If i break it down im lonely and scared.</p><p>I wish every one a good day .   Brett.</p><p> </p></div>", "date": "01-10-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/36114", "content": "<p>Dear Beaser...being heart broken is horrible.  Unfortunately it seems to be a part of so many people's lives,...so many have been there.  I've been there.  Breaking up is horrible.   Don't feel guilty or \"less than\" or scared because of your reactions and deep deep sadness.  It is to be expected.  Try not to fight the feeling of \"feeling lonely and missing her\"...recognise the feeling and allow yourself to feel it and give it a chance to move through you.     My partner died a couple of years ago.  It was the ultimate \"break up\".  I was not there when he went and didn't have the chance to say goodbye.    He was the only man who ever really loved me.   I am heartbroken too,  and missing him terribly.....for different reasons than you dear Brett......you will get through this and come out stronger....don't be scared...you are already doing it and growing, even though you can't see that now....xx</p></div>", "date": "19-01-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Thank you for your reply Moonstruck.</p><p>I am so sorry to read of what youve been through yourself.  </p><p>The fact that you can still reply to me and offer some great advice speaks volumes about the person you are .    I cant imagine what your going through yourself.    </p><p>Im going through that phase of feeling like it was all my fault and i didnt realise how good things were when we were together I will be honest and admit we had problems . I found it very hard that she was also in contact with guys that she  had met online . She felt angry at me for that  .  I guess i had a lot of insecurities.   </p><p>Im 56 and have battled for about 40 yrs with my depression and anxiety ad its affected my relationships.       Thanks again and love to talk more with you or others.     Brett.</p></div>", "date": "19-01-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/36114", "content": "<p>Hi Beaser...don't know if you are a reader...here are a few books that helped me through my anxiety {which I have had sometimes very badly for years..long before my partner died...it hasn't just come upon me, so I have some sort of understanding how crippling and horrible severe anxiety is!  .....anyway these books have helped me calm down a bit and feel more hopeful in the past.....Ask and It Is Given by Esther and Jerry Hicks, The Amazing Power of Emotions..by the same authors....and Tiny Beautiful Things by Cheryl Strayed...which is a series of her answers to readers of a newspaper in which she was a columnist...they wrote with all sorts of problems and her answers are nothing short of genius!   Common sense, mixed with an excellent knowledge of human emotions and life itself.....she's \"been there\" too and I just love her replies to the writers....sometimes very serious, sometimes light hearted and amusing.......she was also author of Wild, about her own life...which was made into a movie starring Reese Witherspoon.  I was wondering how long you and your partner were together?     { don't forget to breathe!!}.......best wishes from Moon S......</p></div>", "date": "22-01-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Hi Moonstruck.</p><p>Thanks again for your kind and thoughtful reply .</p><p>I have read a few books but not  the ones you mention so ill keep a lookout.  I read one by Ekke Toll , The Power of Now.  Also one more recent by Turria Pitt. </p><p>In answer to your question i was only with my partner for about months. I know thats not long but it still left me feeling lost and lonely since we split up about 8 months ago  now.  I guess its easy to look back and gloss over things and forget why things went wrong. We met in the middle of covid and here in Victoria it was a tough time. We were legally only allowed to see each other for a lot of that time. Then when things opened up i had a desire catch up with old friends and do some of the things i had done previous . I have no close family contact and my friends and the football club were my happy place. I think i may have come across as a bit selfish because of that and i regret that.  Im doing my best but its tough ATM .        </p><p>Thanks again Moonstruck i hope your well yourself.   Always happy to talk    Brett.</p></div>", "date": "23-01-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Im feeling really scared again. I just dont know where im heading  in life...  Im trying to find a new job but im so scared i wont find something im happy in.  I left my job of 15 years last year and maybe ive made a terrible mistake..  I think when you live alone in my case i just didnt have anyone to talk things over with and get a better perspective.  I am so lonely as i split up with my girlfriend last year.    Im tired of this way of life.   Best wishes Brett.</p></div>", "date": "24-02-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>My  Birthday is today .  </p><p>I feel really flat about it.  I turn 57 and feel just so alone .  </p><p>I just feel really scared as i just want someone to be there for me on my birthday.  I can understand this may sound a bit self indulgent but im finding it tough today.  Best wishes       Brett,</p></div>", "date": "06-03-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/44771", "content": "<p>Hi Brett</p><p> </p><p>I’m so sorry that you’re feeling this way, and that you’re feeling scared. I’m here now to talk if you would like?</p><p> </p><p>It’s not self indulgent at all, from only one post I could tell how kind and thoughtful you are. That’s another thing to be proud of and kind to yourself about - <span>today you spent the time offering me reassurance and support even though you’re scared yourself.</span></p><p><span><br>G</span></p></div>", "date": "06-03-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Hi G </p><p>I hope your going ok.  Birthdays can be hard and i think for people in our position even tougher.  </p><p> </p><p>I got into see my Dr  yesterday and had a talk and tweeked things a bit. So im hoping this helps .  I dont know about yourself but its such a roller coaster ride for me. Im here if you wish to talk and am interestedto hear how you are going.   Brettt</p></div>", "date": "08-03-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/3340", "content": "<p>Hey Beaser</p><p>Wanted to pass on a shout out for sharing what you did on your original post. </p><p>Im 29 and have often felt lost with myself but I see that the struggle is not an age thing. </p><p>Its a weird thing to be reassured about tbh. But I'm just saying that I'm glad you felt free to post in the way you did. </p><p>Any advice for a younger man?</p><p>Cheers </p><p>Hamsolo01</p></div>", "date": "08-03-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/44771", "content": "<p>hello!</p><p> </p><p>It’s good you were able to get in to see your dr - hopefully the adjustments help.</p><p> </p><p>Roller coaster is definitely right, some days feel alright and then others feel like I haven’t gone anywhere. I think my routines are really important in this because I live alone too, and it’s too easy to withdraw.</p><p> </p><p>You mentioned that football and your friends were your happy place?</p><p> </p><p>g</p></div>", "date": "08-03-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Hi and best wishes to everyone.  I know that there are people doing it so much harder than me. But i just feel defeated at the moment.  Im just so lonely and i miss my ex partner so much and i know i have to move on .I started a new job that i was going well at but i couldnt go in on Wednesday and i feel really bad about it. Im sick of fighting this battle and im tired from it. Just how much do i have to go through . Im sorry to be on such a downer but i dont know where to turn to at the moment.    If i break it down im lonely and scared.</p><p>I wish every one a good day .   Brett.</p><p> </p></div>", "date": "01-10-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/22474", "content": "<p>Dear Brett, you can post all day &amp; night if you want to! It's YOUR thread so there's no limit on the posts you write (I think lol!). </p><p> </p><p>I want to challenge the concepts &amp; use of words like \"fighting\" &amp; \"battle\" regarding life. <br>Reason being, if it's been a constant for 30y then what you've been doing up till now hasn't served you well. </p><p> </p><p>We can turn this thinking around a 180 degree turn.<br>Be KIND to yourself. (Self-care has been proven by research to enhance wellbeing of ANYONE). <br>Doing ALL the things you know to do, to increase your wellbeing - positive thinking ie catching a yuck thought, snapping back to replace with a POSITIVE thought <em>every single time</em>. </p><p>Eating healthy food. <br>Doing happy exercise (I LOVE gardening and helping in others' gardens, Community and otherwise)... raising serotonin to a healthy level will help your outlook. <br>Avoiding alcohol is a biggie. </p><p> </p><p>Another challenge lol, is yes we may have mental health issues that are not our <em>fault</em>, but they are our responsibility. </p><p>Remaining in a \"blame everyone mode\" for extended periods is not healthy for anyone. <br>This is looking at life as an empty cup, when there is ALWAYS so much to be grateful for. <br>GRATITUDE remedies this. </p><p> </p><p>It's easy to slip into old habits of thinking, like worrying. I do it sometimes too! Then this thinking and remedy by above. <br>You see there's ALWAYS something to worry about, always.<br>I know myself, I'll be working till I'm 100yo or beyond lol. I'm a bit older than you, still have a house full of kids! Broken back, so many physical injuries, I have enough to \"medically retire\"... in the other pot, I also have \"enough\" MH diagnoses to medically retire because of these too. </p><p>But my AIM is to ENJOY Life! <br>To do this I CHOOSE to keep working to keep my mortgage payments. </p><p> </p><p>We have choices! <br>We are so fortunate Brett, <br>Love EM</p></div>", "date": "13-10-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Thanks EM.   Its always good to hear from you.       You always make a lot of sense to me..   I know i need to change the way i look at things and remember that life is good.   I know that alcohol isnt a good thing but unfortunately its been how ive connected in that my friends are mostly all drinkers. I have cut from drinking heavy strength to mid and have stopped drinking at home.   I know its not ideal but its my only social outlet to visit my local and see my friends.  I am off to my fathers old home area/smalltown for a school 150 yr celebration this week so that will be a bit different and ill see some old cousins and family  but i am a bit nervous.  I now there is also much to be grateful for and there are a lot of really good people out there.   On a positive i took an extra shift at work today it would have been easy to not but i chose to show up ..   </p><p>Im sorry to read of your physical injuries and i must say i admire the way you choose to fight that isa great trait</p><p>I will think of your wise and kind words today and i will write back tonight to let you know how things go.           Love Brett.</p></div>", "date": "14-10-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/44794", "content": "<p>You're not alone dude, it helped me initially to learn that i wasnt special in my issues, and that this stuff is very common. It doesnt make it any better i know. I find throwing myself into hobbies i enjoy helps. Especially anything where you have to focus hard. It clears your head. Dont be afraid to lean on family if theyre available. Hope you feel better.</p></div>", "date": "20-10-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>I am feeling very scared at the moment . I seen my GP yesterday but i find it hard to open up at times i think because im feeling ok when im with him but i fall flat when i walk away. I just want a way through all this . Im very lonely .    Brett</p></div>", "date": "28-10-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Thanks Andrew and others. I appreciate your reply. I so wish i did have family to lean on i just feel so alone and scared at the moment. I seen my phycologist on Friday. I wish had of opened up more but at times i dont know  what i want to say if that makes sense.  Love to all Brett.</p></div>", "date": "02-11-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/22474", "content": "<p>Hey Brett, I missed this reply. </p><p> </p><p>How did the School 150y Celebration go? </p><p> </p><p>omg I laughed when I read this &gt;&gt;&gt; <em>\"I admire the way you choose to fight that is a great trait\" </em></p><p> </p><p>Hey Big Fella! <br><br>I don't \"fight\" anything LOL! </p><p> </p><p>This is one very important part of everything I'd love for you to understand. <br>It's being at PEACE with all things. It's not on the spectrum of <em>fighting</em> for anything. <br>NOT \"fighting\". </p><p><br>STRIVING is a FAR BETTER mental mindset to have! </p><p> </p><p>If you can ONE thing, just ONE! <br>Replace the word \"fight\" with <em><strong>strive</strong></em>. </p><p> </p><p>Idk I can see you swimming around in ruminating thoughts. <br><br>YOU CAN RISE ABOVE THESE! </p><p>You can change your LIFE to experience AMAZING things when you change your thoughts. </p><p> </p><p>When your change your thoughts EVERYTHING CHANGES. </p><p> </p><p>I'm IMPRESSED that you took an extra shift at work! SEE &gt;&gt;&gt; you put what you KNOW was good for you instead of falling into the same ole default mindset of dipping out and running away to hide. <br>YOU PUT YOURSELF INTO THE ARENA and have been VERY BRAVE in doing so! </p><p> </p><p>THIS is what I admire about YOU. <br>Being BRAVE with your life. </p><p> </p><p>Striving and being brave. This is your mantra now too because I'm a really good sharer, you can have those too lol. </p><p> </p><p>Love EM</p></div>", "date": "10-11-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Thanks  EC  I always think so much of your replies. </p><p>From now on i will strive to do better.   Its a better way to look at things and i will take it on. </p><p>The 150 celebration was good , very much an old country celebration and very relaxing.</p><p>I am trying, whoops striving to do well at work and step up where i can.</p><p>Your right about the ruminating and i want to get better with that.  CHANGE MY THOUGHTS. </p><p>How have you been.  ?</p></div>", "date": "11-11-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/22474", "content": "<p>Hey Brett, good on you! <br><br>So glad to hear you had a nice time at the School Celebration, sweet! </p><p> </p><p>I'm doing so well! So are all my kids. <br><br></p><p>I wanted to drop in and let you know I'm leaving the forums for a hiatus. <br>We've got so much stuff in the pipeline, we're collaborating with others on some businesses and hope to launch the first one within 2 months. Then the next one. </p><p> </p><p>Plus I have some unwell, in real life, friends I really want to spend more time with. <br>Every moment of life is precious! <br>I'm JUMPING into it boots and all lol! </p><p> </p><p>Trips overseas too lol. </p><p> </p><p>SO all grand here! </p><p> </p><p>I wish you all the very best Brett. You're AWESOME! </p><p>Love EMxxxx</p></div>", "date": "11-11-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Thanks EC.   Sounds like you have a bit on and i hope everything goes well.   </p><p>Sorry to see you have to leave for awhile ill miss hearing from you but i understand am glad you are doing whats right for you.....        Your Friend Brett.</p></div>", "date": "12-11-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Feeling scared and confused again i just dont know where im headed  . Ive been working 3days a week in a new job which is all that i can handle. People say i need to work more hours but my anxiety is crippling me. I also have a small mortgage and am stressed about that.   Im also very lonely and miss my ex  partner who i broke up with 8 months ago. Im trying to be respectful and not make contact but i miss her so much. I have no family help and im just feeling so lost at the moment. Im actually quite scared about where i am going to end up .     Brett.</p></div>", "date": "19-01-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Hi and best wishes to everyone.  I know that there are people doing it so much harder than me. But i just feel defeated at the moment.  Im just so lonely and i miss my ex partner so much and i know i have to move on .I started a new job that i was going well at but i couldnt go in on Wednesday and i feel really bad about it. Im sick of fighting this battle and im tired from it. Just how much do i have to go through . Im sorry to be on such a downer but i dont know where to turn to at the moment.    If i break it down im lonely and scared.</p><p>I wish every one a good day .   Brett.</p><p> </p></div>", "date": "01-10-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473" }, { "author": "user-id/22474", "content": "<p>Hey Brett, I hope you have a good day too buddy! </p><p> </p><p>I wonder if another way of thinking about things would help? <br>So far the current thinking isn't help you much, so it's worth a try but will take a change in your mind... so let's give it a go hey? </p><p> </p><p>Instead of thinking you are \"fighting a battle\", and I see this phrase throughout the forums too, so it's a common thought process.... <br>Replace this battle thinking with <strong><em>being kind to yourself</em></strong>. </p><p> </p><p>SO whenever something seems too hard to do, be kind to you. <br>Ask yourself what you're feeling and ALL those feelings are okay. <br>Nurture them. I have even asked \"them\" - \"what can I do right now to soothe you?\" and if the answer to myself is, not now, I have to go to work! <br>Then promise yourself you will do this thing AFTER work. </p><p> </p><p>It seems too gentle to do much at all for us, BUT <strong>self-care</strong> is research backed as the ONE thing that helps us recover from many mental illnesses. <br>I write a daily list in the SELF-CARE thread on the forums and now over many months, most of these have become HABIT. </p><p> </p><p>These HABITS are life changing Brett! </p><p> </p><p>Life can be hard, no one ever gave us a Guarantee on paper at birth to say \"LIFE SHOULD BE EASY\" but I know for 100% certain, that you've got the perseverance to make the very best out of your life that you can. </p><p> </p><p>I know it! <br>Can you access YouTube? <br>Brene Brown has gorgeous Ted Talks and other clips on \"vulnerability\" and other topics. You are very BRAVE to continue on, get a job, deal with the present issues. All of us here are very brave indeed. </p><p> </p><p>Hope you can find some help in these words, <br>Love EM</p></div>", "date": "01-10-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473" }, { "author": "user-id/13663", "content": "<p>Hi Brett.  Every aspect of life seems to be a process.  Some cycles are longer than others.  I guess the thing that keeps me going, is knowing there is a beginning and an end.  I try not to get hung up thinking on either of those points in time, but do what I can to put one foot in front of the other which helps to console me in accepting myself right here - right now.   </p><p> </p><p>Feeling defeated in a world bent on competition seems to have a condition/ing that leaves people feeling ashamed.  Seeing the bigger picture with the world being as it be does not often help.  It tends to make many of us feel very small.  It can become quite overwhelming and disempowering.  I ask myself often \"how can I reinvigorate myself?\" \"How can I get back up?\"     <br><br>Again ... Life happens in cycles ... I remind myself of that and it's been that way for well over half a century for me.  During these very low times as you describe, I just do what I can to put one foot in front of the other in terms of both mind and body with the focus to put the past behind me and the future out of sight where for my predispositions are much better dealt in the here and now. </p><p> </p><p>The less I focus and other people's narratives regarding one's/our story, the less disabled I become.  The less I think on the future, the more empowered I become whilst not giving a care for any expectation this world or others may and may not have.  I acknowledge the pain as pain and just do what I can to accept it for no more than the painful feeling it is knowing I would do well to just take another step under my own power as doing so has always yielded a sense in satisfaction for what I still have in terms of me.  As in all is not lost if you can still be friends with yourself in a world of shame and blame.  Moreover, there is less of the latter once you can master the art of moving on.  </p><p> </p><p> Let go of what does not work for you and the tellings of others that do not gell well for you.  Focus on what works for you and you be the one that decided what that be.  Right now for me is very hard just like as it is for you.  My best friend right now is the Sun.  <br><br><br></p><p> </p></div>", "date": "01-10-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Thank you EC.   Nice to hear from you again.   </p><p>I have had a look at some of the Brene Brown videos that you previously recommended me and they are great.</p><p>I sort of understand what you say about self care and i think the idea is to do what i have to do in my day and then give myself some me time to be kind to myself.         Its just the bad week at work that floored me again and when im down with things like that i just get so lonely and scared.  Ive done my best to not contact my  ex and havent for a few days so i think i can pat myself on the back for that one. I will keep looking at he Bren Brown videos as they are great ...    Thank you EM. i really appreciate you puting in the time and effort to helping me with things.     Brett.</p></div>", "date": "01-10-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473" }, { "author": "user-id/22474", "content": "<p>Hi again Brett, you're doing so well. You've got another job recently and you're handling the recovery from break up as best you can. Please don't be harsh on yourself. </p><p> </p><p>You can pat yourself on the back for those things and everything you do or the manner in which you're choosing to change your thoughts AND being able to restrain yourself from contacting ex. <br>Pats for ALL things and everything. </p><p> </p><p>Writing down what we're GRATEFUL for is another powerful recovery tool. There's a 3 things to be thankful for today thread here too... using the threads in the Wellbeing sections shows you are reaching out to improve your MH. 99% of our recovery I believe is up to us, this is how it's been for me anyway, even with rare support from a Psychologist. I do have a Counsellor which helps me a LOT. </p><p> </p><p>May I ask exactly what you're scared of? <br>I don't want to guess so I hope you don't mind me asking? </p><p> </p><p>Some times when we write down exactly what we're having negative feelings about, they can lose their power of us. <br>We can also find ways to deal with the thoughts that may have become habitual. Changing them to improve our overall outlook on life. </p><p> </p><p>Hugs, dealing with a break up has never been easy for me either, <br>Love EM</p></div>", "date": "01-10-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Hi and thanks again EM.    I really appreciate you getting back to me.      You asked what im scared of.   I guess im just scared of facing this world alone and keeping up with all the responsibilities paying my mortgage and bills.    </p><p>I have to be honest im hurting so much missing my girlfriend. I did text her on Monday if im honest out of loneliness. I havent since.  I notice shes logged out of facebook too so maybe shes jus needing complete space. I dont think its because of me as she has often done it .   </p><p>Im scared too because im sick of fighting this battle in my head and i worry about scaring my friends off.   You know im proud of how much ive fought over many years.  A small comfort is that i know that my mental health is not my fault and its that ,that causes my insecurities  .Im 56 and and ive worked since i was 16 and im tired.  I cant help being the person i am..       Thank you EM  I always love to hear from you and respect your thoughts.   Have a Happy Day  and hopefully chat soon.     Brett.</p></div>", "date": "02-10-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473" }, { "author": "user-id/44582", "content": "<p>Hi Brett, I’m new on the forum and I hope you don’t mind me replying to your post. It just struck a chord with me because I’m a similar age to you and have also struggled with severe anxiety my whole life. It often seems hard to go on. I just wanted to say that I think you definitely deserve to be proud of how hard you’ve fought for so long, and of the fact that you just keep going. It takes a lot of courage and strength to feel that much pain and still hang in there. I don’t have any great solutions - I wish I did! But I just wanted to tell you that I really hope things get better for you. Hope you have a good day.</p><p>izbee</p></div>", "date": "04-10-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Hi Izbee welcome and thank you for your kind reply.      I am sorry to hear that you have had similar battles to me.     I managed to work three days this week so thats been good.  I am trying to just remind my self im doing my best sometimes its better than good other times just good and at times not as good as i would hope for.  I hope your going ok and well done on fighting so hard.  Happy to hear more about how your going and chat more    Beaser.</p></div>", "date": "05-10-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Thank you so much for your kind and great reply Ponder. It really does make a lot of sense. You know im starting to try harder to accept that i am who i am ive made mistakes ill make some more. But you know ive never hurt anyone but myself and have also made some good decisions. Andas ive said im proud of the fight ive fought.  Thanks again Ponder.  Always happy to talk.   Brett.</p></div>", "date": "06-10-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p> I hope its ok to post again.   Im just feeling a lot df despair and hopelessness at the moment.    Regular readers may know ive left a job i was at for 15 years im now really scared and doubting myself.  I know i wasnt happy for a long time and was in a very toxic environment but they did look after me and now im scared about not getting a suitable job again and even going broke.  Ive also split from girlfriend six months ago and im so lonely.  I have had a lifelong battle with depression and been treated for over thirty years and its wearing me down. Im at the stage where i feel like i cant excpect anything better in life .How hard do i have to fight . Ive made mistakes but its just the battle i fight. </p></div>", "date": "13-10-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-scared-again/td-p/548473" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/16871", "content": "<p>Hi friends,</p><p>My anxiety has been hanging around last few weeks. It's been awful. Something triggered  me which led to ruminating &amp; catastrophising. Round &amp; round it goes, making up scenarios, triggered by other little things, even just a word. Once I'm triggered every little thing is magnified and round it goes again from one thing to another. It's exhausting. It's not the first time &amp; probably not the last. I've tried to practise mindfulness, gratitude, positive thoughts. I've told myself they are just thoughts. I've tried to  remember how it feels when I'm not anxious,  when my mind is clear. I'm trying to understand.</p><p>They are just thoughts. I find this important to remember because no matter what the thought or trigger is, the feeling is the same. If I were told tomorrow I had a terminal disease,  the anxious feeling would be tge same as the anxious feeling i have about other triggers. I've had anxiety for years,  i know it well. </p><p>I try to remind myself of this. The triggers,  the reason the thought that causes my anxiety may be different but the feeling is always the same.</p><p>It IS just a feeling.</p><p>Cmf</p></div>", "date": "10-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/same-feeling-different-thoughts/td-p/569911" }, { "author": "user-id/48080", "content": "<p>I'm so sorry you have been feeling this way, I can't even begin to imagine what you are going through. I am someone who also has suffered from years of crippling anxiety to the point no matter how hard you try and what you do it never seems to be enough to you never feel like it will stop. Even with medication and techniques of mindfulness it only may stop for a few seconds or none at all. I totally understand and hear you. At the end of the day yes, it's just our thoughts and yes, it's an overwhelming crazy feeling throughout our body but only we can truly understand ourselves no matter how hard we try to explain it or describe it. Everyday years ago, I used to just become so worked up and triggered and overwhelmed and thought no one could understand me or support me. It took me a long time to realize I was the only one who could change this, I was the only one who could push myself to not feel like this anymore. I had to do things and put myself out there in groups and other Enviromental situations and places just to help take the reality of knowing I had anxiety away. Everyone is different but it helped me and I still today struggle some days with it but it's not every day and that is okay because I'm allowed to struggle but we cannot let it control us no matter how hard it gets. I'm here to support you and listen in any way I can and I hope that together we can overcome this even by the littlest bit. </p></div>", "date": "11-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/same-feeling-different-thoughts/td-p/569911" }, { "author": "user-id/44313", "content": "<p>Hello CMF,</p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>I just want to say Sialani, what you said is incredibly empowering and inspiring.</p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>My anxiety has shifted, I used to deal with very much the same thing as you CMF, now I think it's more reactionary and anticipatory. I used to essentially drive myself mad with intrusive thoughts and stressing about them making me an awful person etc. It wasn't always the worst thing in the world but it bare minimum wasn't something I agreed to, which would spur my mind to try and trigger me further. Sounds insane right? </p>\n\n<p><br>\nA channel called \"TherapyInANutshell\" on YouTube really helped me with understanding my anxiety and helped me overcome my intrusive thoughts. A video in particular she has really helped me create space between thoughts and who I was. That barrier of separation is a really powerful tool that I think could help with a lot of different problems relating to thoughts being overwhelming. The video in question is called \"Leaves on a Stream\".<br>\n <br>\nI hope your anxiety passes soon. Feel better <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":red_heart:\">❤️</span></p></div>", "date": "11-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/same-feeling-different-thoughts/td-p/569911" }, { "author": "user-id/16871", "content": "<p>Hi Sialani &amp; Flop, </p><p>Thanks for posting.  Sialani I'm glad you were able to put yourself out there &amp; do things that helped you. </p><p>Flop, I'll look at the YouTube video you mentioned, thanks.</p><p>When I read others' posts about their anxiety it also reminds me it's just a feeling. We are all experiencing the same feeling but the thoughts are different. </p><p>Cmf</p></div>", "date": "15-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/same-feeling-different-thoughts/td-p/569911" }, { "author": "user-id/16871", "content": "<p>Hi Flop </p><p>Great videos.  Thanks <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":smiling_face_with_smiling_eyes:\">😊</span></p></div>", "date": "15-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/same-feeling-different-thoughts/td-p/569911" }, { "author": "user-id/44313", "content": "<p>Hope you found it helpful <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span> </p></div>", "date": "16-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/same-feeling-different-thoughts/td-p/569911" }, { "author": "user-id/16871", "content": "<p>Hi Flop &amp; everyone reading,</p><p>I also found another one ( by someone else) about separating the thought from the feeling.  It was about finding where the feeling is &amp; nurturing yourself. My doing so it should move your focus from the thoughts &amp; stop the ruminating. Interestingly,  I was feeling unwell a few days ago. Headache, tired, blurred vision. I cam home from work &amp; crashed on the couch. I could only focus on feeling unwell &amp; it calmed me.</p><p>Cmf</p></div>", "date": "22-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/same-feeling-different-thoughts/td-p/569911" }, { "author": "user-id/48312", "content": "<p>Hi CMF,</p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>Yes, it is a feeling, but not just a feeling. The worst and best things in life are feelings - pain, joy…all just words to describe feelings (and all words fall short in my opinion, but they are the best we’ve got).</p>\n\n<p><br>\nFor me, when I broke, I was overseas, in a place I hated, I felt completely alone. I was absolutely terrified and it was a step-by-step, minute-to-minute fight to never capitulate to the lizard-brain of comfort…comfortable thoughts like “it’s just a feeling”, or “I don’t want to do that, so I won’t…”. That cloud wanting me to just hide from the world, wishing life would go back to the way it was…that - to me - was the voice of weakness, primitive brain seeking comfort in the known and predictable. </p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>What has helped me - and still does to this day - is that I refuse to let the negative thoughts control me. Yes, some days are tough, but they are the most rewarding when you push through (and yes, the worst days did need anti-anxiety medication to assist me on that journey - and, in time, I formulated a plan to get off them, which I am now, but it took time). </p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>Yes, this difficult period will pass. I believe it is best to see the difficult times as an opportunity - the discomfort gives you the opportunity to really find what in life is scaring you, triggering you and holding you back…you can find that, defeat it and be a stronger person for it. <br>\nIn dealing with your anxiety - not running from it or hiding - but facing it with honesty and courage, with the strength you have right now, you will beat it. <br>\n<br>\nIt will take time; it will hurt, but nothing  rewarding in life is easy. <br>\n </p>\n\n<p>I found cold showers/baths/(if you’re really keen, ice-cold river plunges!) were a good  reboot to the brain when life was dark. Cardio - run, walk, bike, whatever you love - burn off the Cordisol, don’t leave it in your system to feed the anxiety that hurts you. Cutting the alcohol - I stopped cold-turkey and it has changed my world (I still drink on occasion, but on MY terms when I want, not to escape, not a routine because it’s what others are doing, not to numb the pain).<br>\n </p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>You are always stronger than you think you are. As tough and merciless as anxiety can be, you have more in you now than it can ever have…on top of that, you have these forums which are also brilliant - they are always here to remind you, you are not alone. </p>\n\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "24-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/same-feeling-different-thoughts/td-p/569911" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48358", "content": "<p>Hi, my sister called me tonight to announce her surprise pregnancy. She is a midwife and tracks her cycle so to h e unprotected intercourse in her fertile window surprises me that it was a surprise. She knows I have been trying to conceive for over 1.5 years with no luck and I have just had a hard time with IVf, she called me and my husband and put us on the spot, did a surprise announcement and recorded us. This is so bad but I was sick on the phone call but just smiled and pretended everything was okay. I cannot believe she didn’t think to call me privately, it was so insensitive, then she mentioned how hard it has been for her, which I am sure ks true, but again so so so I I sensitive.</p><p> </p><p>I am so disappointed in her at the way she shred this news. I have been trying so hard for so long to get pregnant and cannot believe this is how she chose to share it. I have also shared amevery detail with her and been speaking to her whilst she is pregnant.</p></div>", "date": "24-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/pregnancy-announcement/td-p/570877" }, { "author": "user-id/38654", "content": "<p>Hi there,</p><p> </p><p>I am so sorry to hear about your struggles with fertility and IVF. I feel for you. But you are not alone, a lot of women experience infertility, but we just don't speak about it. We are expected by society to bear children, so when many of us start to struggle with conceiving, no one talks about it. Please stay strong and keep trying, because you are not alone <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":red_heart:\">❤️</span></p><p> </p><p>It is surprising at the insensitivity your sister displayed, especially since she is a midwife. I am sorry to hear that. I assume she is just excited about her pregnancy and wanted to share it with you, which is okay, but I do agree that it should've been done in a private, respectful way which would have allowed space for you to be upset at the same time due to your struggles with fertility. </p><p> </p><p>I would perhaps speak with her about it - just say that you are happy for her and excited to meet your niece/nephew (which will be lovely, won't it?), but that you would just like some sensitivity displayed due to the fact that you are struggling to conceive. Tell her how upsetting it has made you feel watching her go through all the steps that you so desperately have been trying to achieve for so long. Hopefully that will help her understand your perspective a bit more.</p><p> </p><p>I hope things improve,</p><p>Jaz xx</p><p> </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "24-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/pregnancy-announcement/td-p/570877" }, { "author": "user-id/48358", "content": "<p>Thank your for the thoughtful reply, this has made me feel better about moving forward x</p></div>", "date": "24-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/pregnancy-announcement/td-p/570877" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48354", "content": "<p>My husband left today for a week for his job, and it's just terrible timing. He's not going on any more for the foreseeable future thankfully but it doesn't help me right now.</p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>I've been going through anxiety on and off for the last couple of months, I've always had it to a degree because I have a disability.</p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>I trialed a new medication for my mental health for a few days months ago, and it sent my anxiety to extreme levels, nearly hospitalising me.</p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>It's still haunting me months later, and I'm scared I'm never going to get any sense of the little normalcy I had back, I don't want to experience this for the rest of my life. I either have the physical symptoms, the mental symptoms, or both. I think I've maybe had an hour or two break from myself in the last week and I'm so deeply exhausted.</p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>I'm starting CBT therapy with a psychologist on Wednesday, and someone I met has kindly offered to do some hypnosis with me for 30 minutes free of charge, but I'm mostly alone for the beginning of the week, at the hardest time, and everything just feels so hopeless. As it is if I'm feeling this anxious still by the appointment I don't know if I'll be able to leave to walk there.</p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>My husband has his own mental health issues that he's currently working through, and we're not able to hold each other up as much as we'd like, so I try to cope on my own mess when I can, and I've gone public about how much I've been struggling, and the people who seem to care the most are my online relationships with friends who either have moved, or live in other states or countries, the local people are the most distant. I'm trying to get a bigger circle but it's hard when you're messed up.</p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>I've been crying non stop today I feel like I handled it better last time he was away, which makes me feel like a failure.</p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>I've increased my medication today by request of my GP, and I just hope that it will only take a few days for things to work or me to settle, one or the other. </p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>My family is far away and I don't think they would understand. They don't have any idea of what is going on with me and it's probably for the best.</p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>His parents know, I'm not sure about his siblings but they aren't very involved in each others lives as they've gotten older, but his parents are quite old and there's not much they can do, and I don't want to put any stress on them.</p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p>I couldn't hold back when his mum rang today though, and I just cried.</p>\n\n<p> </p>\n\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "23-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-feel-so-alone/td-p/570818" }, { "author": "user-id/48354", "content": "<p>I feel so bad for using the online service as much as I have been but I'm so grateful it's there. </p></div>", "date": "23-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-feel-so-alone/td-p/570818" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48255", "content": "Hi all. <br>\nI have been living with anxiety for 3 years and medication has been a blessing. I have decided to reduce my medication. To be honest, I don’t really know why since it works well for me. I guess, I want to prove to myself that I can do it without it and anxiety will not win. I’m not sure if this is a way of thinking about it.<br>\n<br>\nIt’s only being a little over a week but I’m feeling symptoms.  Mostly negative thoughts and restlessness on my legs.  I was wondering if anyone has any tips on how to make this transition a little easier.  Has anyone reduced their medication and was successful?  Many thanks <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":folded_hands:\">🙏🏼</span> </div>", "date": "16-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-medication-tapering/td-p/570295" }, { "author": "user-id/32332", "content": "<p>Dear Pebz-04~</p><p>I'd like to welcome you here to the forum where I'm sure you wil find others who have been in exactly your situation.</p><p> </p><p>Having an anxiety condition (as I know) is very restricting on one's life and highly unpleasant. So finding a medication that saves you from all that is a real blessing - it took me years to find the right one.</p><p> </p><p>I can quite understand why you might want ot go off meds. Things sound as if they have been good and there is a temptation to think it is you, and the meds are no longer necessary.</p><p> </p><p>I've felt that way too. The trouble is that tailing off is something that needs to be done under medical supervision as the results can be very unpredictable -everyone reacts differently. One time I became overconfident, another suicidal.</p><p> </p><p>So I hope you are doing this in conjunction wiht your doctor. If not may I strongly suggest you wait until you have seen them and got the ok.</p><p> </p><p>I'm not trying to be discouraging, you may in fact not need them now, I've no idea. I do know I've never been able ot manage without them and expect to take them permanently, which realy is no big thing as in my case the side effects are pretty minor.</p><p> </p><p>If you felt like it we would like to know how you get on</p><p> </p><p>Croix</p></div>", "date": "17-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-medication-tapering/td-p/570295" }, { "author": "user-id/48288", "content": "<p>I reduced but stay on 50% dose. Similar side effects including bad sleep. I think it's important to look after yourself and ha e support during this time e.g someone to talk to. I also practice meditation which  can  be difficult but has improved my mood over several months. I know that it's not for everyone </p></div>", "date": "18-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-medication-tapering/td-p/570295" }, { "author": "user-id/48255", "content": "<p>Thank you Croix.</p><p>I was reducing it with guidance from my GP.  Unfortunately, I couldn’t do it. I was becoming very emotional and had two meltdowns after I wrote my original post.</p><p>I just felt awful so I started taking my original dose <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":pensive_face:\">😔</span>.  I’m disappointed but I’m a mother of two so I need to be able to function and this is what my medication does, it allows me to be myself pre-anxiety diagnosis.  I’m feeling better every day. I guess I need to work on accepting that I will need to take it for the rest of my life and I think I need help to do this.</p><p>I will be starting counselling again next month but my focus this time will be different. Accepting.</p></div>", "date": "20-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-medication-tapering/td-p/570295" }, { "author": "user-id/32332", "content": "<p>Dear Pebz-04~</p><p>I'm very glad indeed you are improving every day. A lot depends upon how you look at things.</p><p> </p><p>To be in a world of complete anxiety, not thinking properly and unable to give your kids all the love they deserve, locked in a smaller restricted world of not knowing how you are going to react to even the most trivial of matters is a terrible thing, and to be free of that is priceless.</p><p> </p><p>The fact you started to go off your meds and then reacted badly is not a failure, it was a way of finding out exactly what needed to be done. You now can contemplate taking meds permanently, just as I have. Provided the side effects are not too hard to put up with its a pretty good deal.</p><p> </p><p>I've reached the stage I'm happy they are available and do their job, it is life-changing for me and I'm content. I hope you will be too. You may find your kids are happier with the  arrangement as well, they get their old mum back.</p><p> </p><p>I'd be very happy if you felt like coming back and giving an update how you are getting on</p><p> </p><p>Croix</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "20-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-medication-tapering/td-p/570295" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48431", "content": "<p>4 years ago I was diagnosed with severe heart disease and had to undergo quintuple bypass surgery at the age of 39. At that time I was terrified that it would take my life or one night I would fall asleep and never wake up. I have a wife and young child and want to see him grow up to become a man. But over the last 4 years the grind of working full time, being a parent and living with this disease has worn me out to the point where I’m just physically, mentally and emotionally exhausted almost all the time. I was working for a company for many years but in the last year I decided to change jobs which was a hard decision because I had to start all over again with sick leave and annual leave, which is a big safety net for me because of my health condition. Recently I had a mishap at work and it cost me my job. It has literally devastated me, now I’m having to start all over again, again. I have health symptoms that I ignore for fear of having to spend weeks in hospital, I think I have ptsd from that place. I have anxiety about applying for jobs, worried that they’ll hold my condition against me. I find it hard to be happy around my wife and child which affects them. I’m at the point where falling asleep and not waking up doesn’t seem so bad.</p></div>", "date": "30-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/can-t-sleep/td-p/571313" }, { "author": "user-id/13121", "content": "<p>Hello Dear Moose80,</p><p> </p><p>A warm and caring welcome to our forums,</p><p> </p><p>I am so sorry your going through all that….</p><p> </p><p>I have and still do have heart disease since the age of 23…I’m now 67, when I was first diagnosed I was afraid to do anything physical even to play with my sons for fear of something going wrong…with my heart…<br><br></p><p>One day I realised that I’m wasting my life by having this fear, so I decided that my fears will not take away my happiness with playing with my children or getting a job….My husband ended up getting me a job and a very physical job at that on a production machine….it was fast paced and exhausting every day, but my fear of my husband was worse then my fear of something going wrong with my heart….I stayed at that job for over 18 years….and through those years I forgot about my heart disease and ended up enjoying working there….and I really enjoyed enjoy playing with my sons….</p><p> </p><p>I learnt when I do feel the symptoms of my heart, I redirect my thoughts off them onto something I like doing…(I grounded myself)…and this helped me a lot…</p><p> </p><p>Starting a new job again can be very stressful, maybe try to find a job which isn’t very stressful for you…I felt that if management doesn’t employ you because of your condition, then they are not the right people to give your time and experience to….They don’t deserve you working for them….</p><p> </p><p>Please, Dear Moose, if you have health symptoms, please try not to ignore them…and reach out to your Dr, Cardiologist to get checked out….you’re life is very important….to you, your beautiful wife, beautiful children and friends..They need you in their lives…they love you…</p><p> </p><p>I am now 67, living alone in a small village, (husband passed from cancer) after hubby decided on a tree change…..hundreds of kilometres away from my sons…I watched them grow, get married and have children of there own….I have 9 grandchildren…..I don’t see them much because of the distance and that my sons work 6 days a week, but they all know that I’m there for them if they need me….I think what I’m trying to say…is to try hard to live your life the best you can and to enjoy every second you can with your beautiful family….</p><p> </p><p>My kindest thoughts given with my care Dear Moose..</p><p>Grandy..</p><p> </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "30-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/can-t-sleep/td-p/571313" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48105", "content": "<p> </p><p>Hey all! <br>This is my first time doing anything like this but I feel like I’m struggling hard. I’m too scared to go see a GP.  I’ve always been the “strong” one in my family. If I talked to them about having possible anxiety attacks they would absolutely pity me and never look at me the same way. <br>Just writing this down in text is making my heart pound and chest feel heavy. </p><p> </p><p>I’ve been having random “bursts” of discomfort on my chest and slow deep breaths is the only way to move the lump away from my chest.<br>I thought it started when I bought my new car. I thought maybe I was feeling a little anxious about the car repayments or the new commitment I just made, but I keep feeling this stupid lump that makes my mind race to think of stupid scenarios that will never happen or make me overthink the way someone greeted (or didn’t greet) me. </p><p>I know I’m being irrational but then that small part of me says “are you? are you being irrational or is something really up and you’re just overthinking your overthinking?” <br>It’s a never-ending cycle. And it’s exhausting. <br>I crunched the numbers again and reassured myself that the new car was in the budget and it wouldn’t be a silly investment in the long run so I know I’m not feeling anxious over that anymore. Just thinking about it doesn’t give the lump or make me overthink. <br><br></p><p>For the past two weeks I’ve been feeling this lump, this pressure! And it comes out of no where. I can be in the middle of playing with my kids and I’ll have to stop and go somewhere quiet and take deep breaths. <br>I can be in the middle of cooking dinner, or even in the middle of doing my job which I love! <br><br></p><p>I don’t know why I’m beginning to feel this way but I’m overthinking everything and I’m feeling like I’m going to pass out from my  overwhelming feelings. I feel like the room is getting smaller and smaller and my chest gets heavier and heavier and a blackness starts to slowly creep in until I feel like I can’t breath anymore. It stops when I shake myself out of it and take deep breaths and tell myself I’m being an idiot. <br><br></p><p>I feel like I’m not good enough. I need to be a better mum, a better wife. I need to be a better daughter, sister, cousin you name it. I need to work harder at work. Everyone is better than me and I’m not doing enough. <br><br>I don’t know what I want out of this post. I feel like it needs more context, more something. But I don’t know what. <br>Maybe someone can give me some tips on how to manage not  being being the best. </p></div>", "date": "04-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/get-it-off-your-chest/td-p/569446" }, { "author": "user-id/43559", "content": "<p>A good start is seeing ur GP if you leave it too long it could get worse this lump ( the lump is usually anxiety) I suffer some of your symptoms deep breathing kinda helps I walk a lot that helps me a lot. You’re certainly not being silly , it’s ok not to be perfect it’s ok to be struggling, it’s also ok to ask for help , not to be strong enough cause  sometimes we all need support and it’s not always easy to carry a burden whatever that  burden may be alone . It’s also ok to worry over things . Perfect I feel myself is not an option cause no one is not ever.  flaws make u you and being able to ask for help takes courage. U can and will I have no doubt and I think your family will help you if they know the extent of how you are feeling about things . Sometimes we all need help and that’s ok. I was strong a long time myself and now I rely on others to help me remain strong and to help me get thru things these are support systems and they are so important. Please don’t be afraid to ask and tell people your not coping </p></div>", "date": "04-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/get-it-off-your-chest/td-p/569446" }, { "author": "user-id/48427", "content": "<p>Brave , just taking the time to vent is a huge step forward. Well done, pat yourself on the back , now what's next? I also have just connected with this forum. I see a lot of you in me. Just sitting here talking with you has helped me. Thank you.</p></div>", "date": "29-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/get-it-off-your-chest/td-p/569446" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/46728", "content": "<p>Hello everyone,<br><br>I live with GAD, OCD and C-PTSD. My anxiety and OCD are on a serious spiral at the moment, and my mind+body and my family are suffering. I am seeing my psych, on meds etc. My self-care really fell by the wayside this year, so I am beginning that as much as I can again. (Modified because OCD is ruling my life).<br><br>Can I have some feel-good encouragement, please - a lot of you understand how I will be feeling, which is nice.<br>Any apps or literally anything that you have used and helped would be amazing too.</p></div>", "date": "27-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/ocd-encouragement/td-p/571116" }, { "author": "user-id/13121", "content": "<p>Hello Dear Ehmel,</p><p> </p><p>I struggle with anxiety, depression and PTSD…and know how hard it is to care for ourselves when struck down with a trigger…</p><p> </p><p>One thing I do when I go to bed, when my mind is very active it too listen to gentle sleep stories, they calm my mind enough to get a decent sleep most nights…I have learnt that if we don’t get enough sleep nightly that it has a huge impact on our mental health…maybe you might give a sleep story a try tonight….I use YouTube…and search get sleepy….then up pops some stories and I just select one….</p><p> </p><p>My self care today was to sit outside under the warmth of the sun…It’s important to take at least an hour out of each day for us…to do something that we like to do….If you have a lot to do through the day, then put something aside and spend some time on you…everything else can wait and isn’t no where near as important as your mental health is…</p><p> </p><p>What kind of self care things do you like doing for yourself?…</p><p> </p><p>You are being so pro active with seeing your psych…and trying to step forward in your self care…</p><p> </p><p>My kindest thoughts Dear Ehmel with my care….</p><p>Grandy..</p><p> </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "27-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/ocd-encouragement/td-p/571116" }, { "author": "user-id/46728", "content": "<p>Thank you for your kind words, Grandy. I really do appreciate it; it was like a warm hug!<br><br>I haven't listened to a sleep story in such a long time, so I think will take your advice tonight and do just that.<br><br>I love to read, do yoga and walk in nature amongst trees. I haven't done any of that for a long time, so I started yoga again this week at home. I don't have it in me to go to classes yet. Baby steps, I guess.<br><br>Thank you again for being so kind <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":red_heart:\">❤️</span></p></div>", "date": "27-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/ocd-encouragement/td-p/571116" }, { "author": "user-id/11269", "content": "<p>Hi Ehmel</p><p>I support my daughter who also experiences GAD and OCD, so I have a good idea of what’s happening for you. I’m so sorry that you have to go through this. Hugs to you.</p><p>I’d just like to remind you that you are not your thoughts. And those thoughts that trouble you are just that, thoughts. They can’t hurt you.</p><p>You are taking very brave and sensible steps to improve your health and should be really proud. I’d like to encourage you to get out for a walk each day, or engage in any type of exercise that you enjoy. It will help lift your mood and provide some distraction.<br>You keep fighting to live your best life, and I’m confident you will get there. It can get better.</p><p>Kind thoughts to you</p></div>", "date": "27-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/ocd-encouragement/td-p/571116" }, { "author": "user-id/13121", "content": "<p>Hello Dear Ehmel,</p><p> </p><p>So true baby steps to start with…then eventually bigger steps can be taken, your doing so well in starting up yoga again…well done…when you’re ready and feel up to going…Is the right time to begin again…no rush Dear Ehmel…in your own time…</p><p> </p><p>Walking in nature is so beautiful, my anxiety stops me from walking anywhere alone…I am lucky where I live, I have grazing land across my road that houses many trees and wildlife, sitting outside at least an hour a day is my main self care…Do you take pictures of things that you like on your walks…that’s away to move your walks up a notch and into a mindful walk, because while walking you’re also looking and taking in all your surroundings and trying to find things to take pictures of….<br><br></p><p>I used to love reading, unfortunately I cannot settle myself enough to read, now I listen to audio books mostly, and at night sleep stories…I think it’s about finding the right way that helps us to distract those constantly bombarding thoughts, onto a hobby or something else we like….</p><p> </p><p>Did you manage to listen to a sleep story last night…if you did, did it help you go to sleep without the anxious thoughts you have?…it doesn’t matter hun if you didn’t listen to one last night…again, when you’re ready is the right time….</p><p> </p><p>I hope today brings you a bit of peace and some light…A gentle reminder Dear Ehmel,  to please do some self care for your beautiful self today….because you are so valuable to your family, friends, yourself and us here at Beyond Blue..</p><p> </p><p>If it’s okay, I would love to send you a very gentle warm and caring hug <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":hugging_face:\">🤗</span> Dear Ehmel..</p><p>Grandy..</p></div>", "date": "28-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/ocd-encouragement/td-p/571116" }, { "author": "user-id/48425", "content": "<p>Oh my! I can't pretend to know what you're going through. Just know that I don't know who you are, and I care anyway, I really do, because we here all suffer. I do use a sleep app, in case you might need one. It basically uses white noise, it's like a gentle crackling. There's a few of them around. The white noise is meant to just clear your mind, so you can sleep better. Of course, you'll always have your thoughts, but what I do, is I allow my thoughts to come through, then I acknowledge them, acknowledge what they're saying to me (or what I'm saying really), then I let them go, and move on to the next one, until all the thoughts in that space are cleared, and I can move on to a more quiet space in my mind, and I can try and relax. This will come in waves, and the ability to allow, then release, allow, then release takes practice.</p><p> </p><p>Good luck... God Bless You!! </p></div>", "date": "29-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/ocd-encouragement/td-p/571116" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48418", "content": "<p>I’m 18 and have never worked under employment. In the last few months, I have applied for 50+ positions and heard back from 3 places. But unfortunately, the job locations were not suitable for me. I have always been a bit anxious and sensitive to rejection, so this cycle of failure is really starting to depress me.</p><p> </p><p>I worked really hard on my resume despite the lack of experience I hold. I don’t really want to reach out to friends who are employed so they can refer me. I would feel pathetic and burdensome to them.</p></div>", "date": "28-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/first-job-search/td-p/571233" }, { "author": "user-id/43559", "content": "<p><em>hi strawberry blonde </em></p><p> </p><p><em>good on u for trying/ applying for 50 jobs that’s a huge effort. Having 3 responses is good , u can ask your friends for help why not ? It’s not burdensome at all , friends ask me but I’m currently on work cover soo a bit redundant at the moment to help my friends, in regards to what u think is a fail of your applications , have u submitted a cover letter with your application ? u know introductory letter why ur applying for the position and what skills u have and what u wanted  to learn on the job ur applying 4 , cover letters often get ur foot In the door as lots of applicant don’t use them , are u also applying 4 traineeships / no experience roles ?as this can help also with getting foot</em> in<em> door ,, Also doing some volunteer work can give u Work experience and references and shows u want to work to employment cause ur actually working for free . Remember ur only 18 give it a few more goes and don’t be afraid to ask ur friends for help they will help you out if they can <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span> you can also go to centerlink they set up a job providing services ( they can help with resumes interview tips jobs available in their provider services that aren’t on seek or job sites also helps give u cash while u look 4 work it’s not much but it helps )</em></p></div>", "date": "29-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/first-job-search/td-p/571233" }, { "author": "user-id/11269", "content": "<p>Strawberryblondie</p><p>You’ve done well to put together your resume and start applying for jobs.  Please, don’t be so hard on yourself; I don’t think anyone finds it easy to look for work and rejection is unfortunately just part of the competitive process. </p><p>Both of my kids at your age also struggled to land their first real job. My daughter wanted to work in a cafe, so she did a one day barista course. She then got dressed up and visited local cafes that she wanted to work at and dropped off her resume. She very quickly got a job.</p><p>My son did the Responsible Service of Alcohol (RSA) course and gained employment through a friend. It’s okay to ask your friends if their employer is hiring—it won’t get you the job but it will get you in the door and then the rest is up to you. Nothing “pathetic” about that.</p><p>I don’t know if sharing their experiences helps because I don’t know what kind of work you’re looking for, but the idea is to get a qualification that helps to make up for the lack of experience. You’re looking for a low cost quick qualification. For example, a first aid certificate may be useful if you want work as babysitter or nanny or in retail.</p><p>Volunteer work is also a really great way to gain experience and show potential employers that you are motivated and productive.</p><p>Good luck with your search!</p><p>Kind thoughts to you</p></div>", "date": "29-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/first-job-search/td-p/571233" }, { "author": "user-id/19707", "content": "<p>Hi, welcome</p><p> </p><p>I joined the defence services 4 days after my 17th birthday. It gave me a start in life that paid dividends all my working life. As soon as a prospective employer opened my resume and saw my RAAF certificate (and commendation from my cyclone Tracy effort) he was \"sold\".  I had 50 professions to choose from, adult pay, cheap rent, meals, dental and medical free. Friendships grew and travel was great around Australia.</p><p> </p><p>I know not all people are suited to defence work but many young people reading will consider it due to the problems you face like finding a job and financial hardship.</p><p> </p><p>Otherwise, have you tried the major fast food outlets? I ask that because lately every time I walk into one there is a sign \"employees wanted\" and thats in Victoria. Age is no barrier to them nor inexperience.</p><p> </p><p>Finally, your sensitivity is common and might not know that 20% of all people have HSP- Highly Sensitive Person (google it) and as one myself, I'd suggest you embrace that part of you because that is ultra feelings that is a beautiful part of you, it supplies your empathy when you embrace care, love and becoming a truly good human being. </p><p> </p><p>It is when you have no sensitivity you have a real problem...</p><p> </p><p>Good luck</p><p>TonyWK</p></div>", "date": "29-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/first-job-search/td-p/571233" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/5835", "content": "<p>Hi to all who read this post. </p><p> </p><p>Right now I feel like an impostor. There is no doubt in my mind that I am suffering from impostor syndrome as I am struggling to remove that mask and be proud of who I am. I have endured, overcome, and accomplished so much in my life so why am I anxious and fearful about the next steps? I am weeks away from turning 50; this makes me anxious because my father died at 50 years of age. </p><p> </p><p><font face=\"inherit\">I have had these feeling for a long time, and now that I am weeks away from finishing a diploma in mental health and a few months away from completed a Bach of Psychological Sciences the thought of finishing is making me fretful. I'm a qualified yoga and </font>Pilates<font face=\"inherit\"> teacher, and work in the counselling world; so I have all the knowledge and techniques to deal with this. I studied in all of these areas to help understand myself yet I don't feel I am any closer. If anything it has just helped me hide who I am better. </font></p><p> </p><p><span>I help people almost everyday to deal with life. So why can't I help myself? Are my past traumas so deeply entrenched in my psyche that they have me in a constant state of flight? I remind myself over and over what I have accomplished yet I still feel like a fraud. I find myself procrastinating now because I am anxious when thinking about actually finishing my studies. I don't know what the future holds and I should be excited yet here I am worrying about what others are going to expect from me, worrying about what my next steps will be. I feel lost. </span></p><p> </p><p>I welcome any advice or words of wisdom to help me gain a different perspective. </p></div>", "date": "26-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/struggling-to-remove-the-mask/td-p/571048" }, { "author": "user-id/19707", "content": "<p>Hi MY, welcome</p><p> </p><p>I'm in awe of your experience and achievements, including those pending ones fast approaching. So I'll fast track the basics not to bore you with what you know.</p><p> </p><p>Yes we can achieve a lot of things but you are right that constant stage of \"flight\" can and often is permanent having been wired from childhood or even birth. It is more a case for us that we should try to get out of ourselves <u><em>the best hand from a dealt deck</em>.</u> </p><p> </p><p>So, with a severe anxiety disorder in 1987 it took a couple of decades to eliminate my anxiety. The first post of my links is all that I ask you to read. </p><p> </p><p><a href=\"https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-how-l-eliminated-it/td-p/183873\" target=\"_blank\">https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-how-l-eliminated-it/td-p/183873</a></p><p> </p><p>In that post you might find a few things that you are overlooking yourself. If not thats ok, without suggesting I can diagnose, I cant of course, here is my second thought about the corner of anxiety-</p><p> </p><p><a href=\"https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/worry-worry-worry/td-p/87808\" target=\"_blank\">https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/worry-worry-worry/td-p/87808</a></p><p> </p><p>Being nicknamed \"the worrier\" at 12yo by a clever observant teacher has credit. I had to detune my natural tendency to worry adopted by my mother that to this day at 92yo is in denial from her mental health issues (I'm guessing due to that denial).</p><p> </p><p>Finally I have also developed distraction to a whole new level (for me). It began when I would dwell about family issues and we owned a huge 3000 piece jigsaw. Every time I over thought I'd enter a spare bedroom and do a handful of pieces. By the time I placed 10 pieces into their spots my thoughts were no longer on what I dwelled on.</p><p> </p><p><a href=\"https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/staying-well/depression-distraction-and-variety/td-p/275790\" target=\"_blank\">https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/staying-well/depression-distraction-and-variety/td-p/275790</a></p><p> </p><p>Re:  <em>\"I help people almost everyday to deal with life\"  </em>Perhaps it's time to consider \"charity begins at home? \" Have you thought that your attention to others has left your own needs thinner than they should be?</p><p> </p><p>I'm here daily or more often, feel free to reply.</p><p> </p><p>TonyWK</p></div>", "date": "26-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/struggling-to-remove-the-mask/td-p/571048" }, { "author": "user-id/5835", "content": "<p>Thank you TonyWH for your words and for links to your previous posts.</p><p> </p><p>As amazing as it was to read how you have explored and found ways to help you, I really feel like I have tried everything over the years with the exception of medication which is not an option for me. You may be correct in that helping others has left me a little less focused on my own issues. While I don't feel transference has been an issue, maybe it has been? That's something I hadn't considered; I thought I was handling it well. </p><p> </p><p>I really do like the jigsaw distraction and have used it in the past but had forgotten about that one, so I may also give that I try. In saying that I wonder if, as wonderful a distraction as it is, I may end up using it to procrastinate. </p><p> </p><p>Perhaps the suggestion of making small changes in my life, my routine, just changing things up a bit may be helpful. I can only try. </p><p> </p><p>Thank you again </p></div>", "date": "26-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/struggling-to-remove-the-mask/td-p/571048" }, { "author": "user-id/19707", "content": "<p>Window shopping helps even if you buy an all day lollypop! I like your attitude to it all. </p><p> </p><p>TonyWK</p></div>", "date": "26-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/struggling-to-remove-the-mask/td-p/571048" }, { "author": "user-id/43559", "content": "<p>Reading your post is like wow gives me hope that i can get thru my depression and anxiety with these tips thank u for adding the links I will try the jigsaw puzzles I currently colour and walk a lot  occasionally garden been a bit too wet to do it. . Also considering major move and job rehabilitation into a different role or area of employment when my thoughts settle down </p></div>", "date": "29-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/struggling-to-remove-the-mask/td-p/571048" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/25103", "content": "<p>Hey, I've been going through a lot lately. When I say 'a lot' I mean a lot of change. Last year I was a mess, everything seemed to be going wrong. And I admit that for the first term of school, things weren't any better, and in some cases they were worse. But one day I was texting my closet friend (cornflakes) about being extremely hungry and wishing I could eat. He encouraged me to eat something, after all I admitted to him that I was hungry. We argued a bit, and the night ended with me eating a small thing in order to 'prove him wrong'. </p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>Before this I had tried many times to eat properly, but I'd never last long. This is my longest time that I've managed.</p>\n<p>But, things are getting really hard right now. Every time I want to eat, it's a battle with my mind. Pros and cons are all I think about. Am I eating too much? Should I be eating? Am I sick enough. Everyday is tiring. But I had an anxiety attack yesterday, and today feels just the same. Like I am going to relapse. Like all of this is for nothing. Like I am not worth enough to eat.</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>How do I get this stupid voice to shut up? I want to be normal again so bad. But it's really hard. I don't know what to do.</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>- Nik</p></div>", "date": "26-04-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/4" }, { "author": "user-id/25103", "content": "<p>Hey,</p>\n<p>Just had a video call with my pediatrician. </p>\n<p>I am really stressing out. I feel like none of the professionals in my life understand what's going on, and that I am never going to receive the help I need. </p>\n<p>I'm going to be stuck in this stupid disordered eating my whole life, now. I'm never going to receive help.</p>\n<p>- Nik</p></div>", "date": "13-05-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/4" }, { "author": "user-id/48415", "content": "<p>Hey Nik,</p><p> </p><p>I have an eating disorder too, and I totally understand that vicious cycle of thoughts that plague me whenever I have to eat. It's a constant battle of should I eat, shouldn't I eat, am I gonna get fat if I do, will I die if I don't, why is this happening to me, what's wrong with me? I gotta say, I still haven't come up with a fool proof solution, but I just wanted you to know that you aren't alone and that I feel you as well.</p><p> </p><p>Something that I think has helped me a bit is thinking about all the amazing things my body can do, like walk, and write, and hug people, and hold hands with loved ones etc., and that it doesn't what I look like, because I can still do those thing. Another thing is viewing myself as my loved ones view me, instead of the negative self critical way I view myself. They love you for a reason, and it might help to focus on the good self empowerment.</p><p> </p><p>Even if those don't end up helping you, I'd like you to know you aren't alone and everything you mentioned is a reality for myself and so many others. And even if I haven't really helped you, you definitely helped me, just hearing your story and the strength you had to share it, as well as knowing that someone else understands.</p><p>Thanks, and have a great night!! Sending everyone love, happiness and strength <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":red_heart:\">❤️</span></p></div>", "date": "28-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/4" }, { "author": "user-id/25103", "content": "<p>Hey, I've been going through a lot lately. When I say 'a lot' I mean a lot of change. Last year I was a mess, everything seemed to be going wrong. And I admit that for the first term of school, things weren't any better, and in some cases they were worse. But one day I was texting my closet friend (cornflakes) about being extremely hungry and wishing I could eat. He encouraged me to eat something, after all I admitted to him that I was hungry. We argued a bit, and the night ended with me eating a small thing in order to 'prove him wrong'. </p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>Before this I had tried many times to eat properly, but I'd never last long. This is my longest time that I've managed.</p>\n<p>But, things are getting really hard right now. Every time I want to eat, it's a battle with my mind. Pros and cons are all I think about. Am I eating too much? Should I be eating? Am I sick enough. Everyday is tiring. But I had an anxiety attack yesterday, and today feels just the same. Like I am going to relapse. Like all of this is for nothing. Like I am not worth enough to eat.</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>How do I get this stupid voice to shut up? I want to be normal again so bad. But it's really hard. I don't know what to do.</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>- Nik</p></div>", "date": "26-04-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/25103", "content": "<p>Hey,</p>\n<p>Oh, I'm so stupid. I didn't realise it was for statistics. I feel more comfortable about the web chat now. Thanks for that.</p>\n<p>I don't believe my psychologist understands a lot about what's going on. I mean, she tries to help, but when she heard about my eating problems she immediately told me she had no experience in dealing with it, and she would seek out a specialist who specialists in these things. I would think that eating is more important, but if she doesn't know how to help, then maybe its best if she focuses on the things she can. I don't really know what's going on with my eating stuff... I feel confused. I wanted help from her, but I don't know what exactly she is trying to do to get me help.</p>\n<p>And, even though I've mentioned to cornflakes that she was working on finding me someone, he keeps saying I need to see a doctor.</p>\n<p>Right now, I am so confused. I just want help and with multiple people 'yelling' (I say that, but they aren't yelling, it just seems forceful) different suggestions, I just feel overwhelmed and confused. All i really want is help. Which is why I came back onto my forum, so i could talk to you and maybe clear some things up.</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>When cornflakes rang my mum she gets upset that I don't talk to them (I mean, they aren't very appraoachable, so it's not really my fault that I don't want to speak to them) and they kind of get mad at me. They've often told me off for talking to cornflakes, I don't ever want to lose him, so I'm afraid for him to talk to my mum, as I usually get the lecture of 'stop talking about those things to your friends. Stop burdening them'. Which is why I don't want him to talk to them.</p>\n<p>I don't want cornflakes to speak to my parents and I don't want to speak to my parents. I guess, with the way things are, I don't really deserve this help. </p>\n<p>- NIk</p></div>", "date": "05-05-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/6224", "content": "<p>Hi Nik,</p>\n<p>With your psychologist, I think it's good that she told you she doesn't know much about eating disorders (rather than just pretending she does) but I don't personally think it's helpful to keep working on you with your autism instead - I don't know the full picture but in my mind I'm thinking one issue at a time? Maybe next time you see her you can ask about the referral she made and how long that's going to take to get in with the next one.</p>\n<p>Honestly, I think a doctor is a good idea, and I think a psychologist is a good idea - and sometimes even a dietician (just to throw a spanner in the works!). With ED's, often there's a few people who work together as a team with you to provide the best care. The psychologist can be the one that gives you the support and therapy, and the GP can be the one who helps you physically (like with malnutrition) and then the dietician can help with finding ways to eat and things to eat. They all have their own place and they can all help.</p>\n<p>I wonder if seeing a GP on your own could be an option? Perhaps you could get some public transport ? I'm not sure how old you are but heres some more info - <a href=\"https://headspace.org.au/young-people/what-is-a-gp-and-what-to-expect/\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://headspace.org.au/young-people/what-is-a-gp-and-what-to-expect/</a>  The page also has the privacy/confidentality stuff down the bottom of your page so you know what they have to and don't have to tell your parents.</p>\n<p>You do deserve help. I can promise you that. I know that it's hard right now and you have so many hoops, but keep going.</p>\n<p>rt</p></div>", "date": "05-05-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/25103", "content": "<p>Hey,</p>\n<p>Asking my psychologist about the specialist is probably a good idea. Perhaps I'll bring that up.</p>\n<p>As for seeing a doctor on my own, I'm afraid thats not an option, since I'm really not allowed to leave my house. Strict parents I guess. Oh well...</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>I get what you mean with the different people I might need to see. If you say a GP is there to help with the malnutrition, then perhaps I don't need to see one, seeing as I'm not malnurished anymore.</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>- Nik (excuse my spelling. Apologies)</p></div>", "date": "05-05-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/6224", "content": "<p>Hey Nik,</p>\n<p>That sounds great. </p>\n<p>Maybe this is something you can ask your psychologist too for her advice; she may have some suggestions. Not being allowed to leave your house sounds rough!</p>\n<p>Sorry can you explain that last bit about not being malnourished anymore?</p>\n<p>rt</p></div>", "date": "05-05-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/25103", "content": "<p>Hey,</p>\n<p>I mean, I can leave my house for excersize but besidrs that I have to have planned it with my parents beforehand and it rarely happens.</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>What I meant about the malnutrition part is that I've been trying to eat for about a month (hence the title being 'relpase')... So I'm not malnurished anymore since I'm back to my normal weight. I mean, yes I skip a meal everyday, but my weight is fine.</p>\n<p>-Nik</p>\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "05-05-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/6224", "content": "<p>Hi Nik,</p>\n<p>Yeah that does sound really tough- thinking about all the things that your parents might be stopping you from doing. I'm really glad you have a friend like cornflakes in your life.</p>\n<p>Oh, maybe malnutrition was a bad choice of word on my part. People can be overweight and be malnourished - it's not about looks or numbers on scales but about having a balanced diet. So when anyone misses a meal or two - or doesn't eat quite as much as their body needs - that might impact things like blood pressure or cholesterol or iron or any of that stuff.</p>\n<p>I just wanted to share that with you so you kinda knew how everyone can play a role together. The more people you have on your side the better - and it looks as though your psychologist is working on someone and you have cornflakes too.</p>\n<p>rt</p></div>", "date": "06-05-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/25103", "content": "<p>Hey,</p>\n<p>So what do you suggest I do in order to see a doctor or someone to help me with this problem, because I am sick and tired of living like this.</p>\n<p>- Nik</p></div>", "date": "06-05-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/27314", "content": "<p>Hi Nik</p>\n<p>It is great to chat to you again and I have been reading your post with RT and they have given you some really wonderful and heartfelt advice and words of comfort.</p>\n<p>I just wanted to say hello and let you know that we all care about you so much. I think it is a great idea to see a doctor and to get some professional help with how you are feeling and your eating routine. You can put a call in to your GP yourself, you can express to the doctor about your concerns with your parents finding out about how you are feeling and what you are worried about. Can I ask though, what would be the worst thing that would happen if you asked your parents to make an appointment for you? What would be the worst thing that would happen if they knew how much you are suffering?</p>\n<p>I am so glad that Cornflakes has been by your side and he too agrees it is time to get some medical help.</p>\n<p>It is really nice to chat to you again and I hope we can get you to some help Nik.</p>\n<p>Hugs</p>\n<p>Sarah</p></div>", "date": "06-05-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/25103", "content": "<p>Hello again!</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>Hmm... The worse thing about asking my parents to make an appointment is the fear that they won't let me go unless they know why. My dad wants to know absolutely everything, and I'm not comfortable telling him everything, so I'm scared that if I talk to them, then they will deny my need for the visit, as they don't know what's going on.</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>The worse thing that could happen if they knew is that they would treat me differently and watch me and I would never be able to live my life normally.</p>\n<p>Hope this helps.</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>- Nik</p></div>", "date": "06-05-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/6224", "content": "<p>Hi ~Nik~ and a wave to Sarah!</p>\n<p>This is really tricky - I'm not sure what I could offer with suggestions that could make it happen. </p>\n<p>While it's not ideal, there is of course Cornflakes - with Cornflakes' help, you were able to see a psychologist even though your parents weren't totally on board with that. It does seem to be the lesser of two evils, rather than just not doing anything at all. </p>\n<p>This is also worth asking your psychologist about, or even The Butterfly Foundation if you decide to talk to them again.</p>\n<p>rt</p></div>", "date": "07-05-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/3" }, { "author": "user-id/25103", "content": "<p>Hey, I've been going through a lot lately. When I say 'a lot' I mean a lot of change. Last year I was a mess, everything seemed to be going wrong. And I admit that for the first term of school, things weren't any better, and in some cases they were worse. But one day I was texting my closet friend (cornflakes) about being extremely hungry and wishing I could eat. He encouraged me to eat something, after all I admitted to him that I was hungry. We argued a bit, and the night ended with me eating a small thing in order to 'prove him wrong'. </p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>Before this I had tried many times to eat properly, but I'd never last long. This is my longest time that I've managed.</p>\n<p>But, things are getting really hard right now. Every time I want to eat, it's a battle with my mind. Pros and cons are all I think about. Am I eating too much? Should I be eating? Am I sick enough. Everyday is tiring. But I had an anxiety attack yesterday, and today feels just the same. Like I am going to relapse. Like all of this is for nothing. Like I am not worth enough to eat.</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>How do I get this stupid voice to shut up? I want to be normal again so bad. But it's really hard. I don't know what to do.</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>- Nik</p></div>", "date": "26-04-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/25103", "content": "<p>Hey,</p>\n<p>She saw me today actually. She is working on finding a specialist for me to see as well as her.</p>\n<p>I guess after my dad kinda called me fat (it was a joke), I felt really self consious. Before then, i never really noticed about it.</p>\n<p>It gets really hard . I ate a lot of walnuts today (but I heard there were benefits for eating walnuts). I'm just holding onto the fact that walnuts are a lot healthier than a lot of other things.</p>\n<p>- Nik</p></div>", "date": "30-04-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/6224", "content": "<p>Hi ~Nik~,</p>\n<p>Ah that's great to hear.</p>\n<p>Oh I'm sorry; it's good that you recognised that and I hope that it can help - because it says to me before that time you was kind of okay with your body so you can get back to that stage again.</p>\n<p>Walnuts are great. I'm glad that you're eating today.</p>\n<p>I don't know if you've seen this one before but it's from the Australian Guide to Healthy Eating. I just wanted to show you this one since it shows stuff from all food groups is healthy too - <a href=\"https://www.eatforhealth.gov.au/guidelines/australian-guide-healthy-eating\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://www.eatforhealth.gov.au/guidelines/australian-guide-healthy-eating</a>  Maybe your psychologist can hook you up with a dietician to get some extra support and reassurance</p>\n<p>rt</p></div>", "date": "01-05-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/25103", "content": "<p>Hey,</p>\n<p>Thank you so much for the website. I had a look at it.</p>\n<p>But... I've relapsed again. Haven't eaten breakfast in two days, and I'm trying not to. I don't know what's wrong with me. I just feel really self conscious. I want to make a change, a really do, but I'm scared.</p>\n<p>I was ok with my body beforehand, because I was extremely skinny beforehand. I'm not anymore, and that scares me.</p>\n<p>- Nik</p></div>", "date": "01-05-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/6224", "content": "<p>Hey ~Nik~,</p>\n<p>That's no worries at all and thank you for sharing that. </p>\n<p>I am a little worried too - food is kind of important! </p>\n<p>I know that you have a big fear of gaining weight which is probably hard to shake right now - but I think it's important to know that even if there was someone who was generally overweight or obese and did need to lose weight, they would still need to eat. Healthy weight loss, or even preventing weight gain - there still needs to be a balance of different food groups. Without it, our body goes into starvation mode. </p>\n<p>I'm hesitant to share all this because I don't want to scare you or be all confronting, but more so let you know that not eating won't actually help you achieve those goals.</p>\n<p>Would you be open to talking with The Butterfly Foundation? I mentioned them before but this way they also have a live chat and probably be nicer and more helpful than me haha </p>\n<p>rt</p>\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "01-05-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/25103", "content": "<p>Hey,</p>\n<p>Don't worry it isn't scaring me.</p>\n<p>If I talked to the butterfly foundation, would it be anonymous? </p>\n<p>- Nik</p></div>", "date": "01-05-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/6224", "content": "<p>Hi ~Nik~,</p>\n<p>Yes- I'm guessing you're thinking about the live chat? </p>\n<p><a href=\"https://www.thebutterflyfoundation.org.au/our-services/helpline/chat-online/\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://www.thebutterflyfoundation.org.au/our-services/helpline/chat-online/</a></p>\n<p>On the page it has lots of details like name, email, phone but if you look just above that it says 'Would you like to remain anonymous?' and you can tick that button.</p>\n<p>Hope this helps; feel free to come back anytime and hopefully it's helpful</p>\n<p>rt</p>\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "01-05-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/25103", "content": "<p>Hey,</p>\n<p>I've been talking to my friend cornflakes and it we came across the discussion of me seeing a doctor.</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>He has mentioned this many times before and I've always denied the need. But this time I decided that he was probably right.</p>\n<p>Even though we have talked, I've come across the problem of how to see a doctor.</p>\n<p>I have anxiety. I struggle to talk to my parents. I can't talk to them to get them to take me to a doctor. If I get cornflakes to call my mum, I will most likely get the repercussions of that and my parents will likely get mad at me.</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>I don't know what to do. How do I get the help I need?</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>- Nik</p></div>", "date": "04-05-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/6224", "content": "<p>Hi ~Nik~,</p>\n<p>It's good to hear from you again; can I ask how you went on with The Butterfly Foundation? Were they helpful?</p>\n<p>It's a great idea that you're seeing a doctor - honestly when I read it I was kind of surprised your psychologist didn't suggest it.</p>\n<p>What is it about your parents that makes them not want to book you in?</p>\n<p>Given that you are seeing a psychologist, how did you get your parents to book you in or get you some support there?</p>\n<p>rt</p></div>", "date": "05-05-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/25103", "content": "<p>Hey,</p>\n<p>Umm about the butterfly foundation... I kinda chickened out, cause they asked for my postcode. I didn't want to give it, because I didn't know what they were going to do with it. And besides, I was already too scared to chat online. Guess it's not really for me.</p>\n<p>I honestly don't know why my psychologist didn't suggest it. I guess, at the moment she's really focused on my recent diagnosis of autism, and been trying to enroll me in a peers group. She's only one person, and we only have an hour to talk every two weeks, so she has to make something the priority, otherwise the sessions would go nowhere. I don't blame her.</p>\n<p>The thing about my parents is, well... they don't know about my eating problems. They knew about it when it first happened, but they tried to force me to eat, and it only made me hide things from them even more. I became sneaky and they didn't know how bad things got, and they still don't know how much I struggle. I say things nowadays like \"I don't know whether to eat anything more, I've already eaten a lot\" and they just laugh at me and say I shouldn't worry. Its like they push off what I'm trying to say as being 'ridiculous'. I'm just scared of their response, which is why I refuse to speak to them.</p>\n<p>I started seeing a psychologist last year when things started going downhill and cornflakes called my mum to tell her about it. Things were really bad back then, so my mum decided to find my a psychologist. </p>\n<p>It's not that they don't want me to see a doctor, it's just that they don't know that I need to see one, and I am to scared to bring it up.</p>\n<p>- Nik</p></div>", "date": "05-05-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/6224", "content": "<p>Hi Nik,</p>\n<p>Hmm, couple of thoughts here so I'll go by them one by one.</p>\n<p>With The Butterfly Foundation - the postcode is purely stats - that way at the end of the year they can tally things up like 'x amount of people in nsw, x amount of people in tas' and 'x amount of people in rural areas, x amount of people in the city'. I can explain that more if you want me to but that's really all they ask about your personal details if you've clicked anonymous. I've had a chat with them before so that's why I recommended them. and as for chatting online, well - you are kind of doing that already with me anyway <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span></p>\n<p>I really feel like from your posts that all the eating stuff really should be the priority. I don't know what it's like for you with your autism, but big picture stuff - eating is more important!</p>\n<p>I'm sorry that your parents have been giving you those comments, it doesn't really sound like they understand what it's been like and so I get that you haven't really opened up to them. It makes sense to me, even though I bet it would be helpful to get some support from them.</p>\n<p>You said cornflakes rang your mum and that's how you got to see a psychologist - was your mum mad then? If that's the worst case scenario, well you did manage to get through and cope with that, so I think you can cope with this one too.</p>\n<p>rt</p></div>", "date": "05-05-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/25103", "content": "<p>Hey, I've been going through a lot lately. When I say 'a lot' I mean a lot of change. Last year I was a mess, everything seemed to be going wrong. And I admit that for the first term of school, things weren't any better, and in some cases they were worse. But one day I was texting my closet friend (cornflakes) about being extremely hungry and wishing I could eat. He encouraged me to eat something, after all I admitted to him that I was hungry. We argued a bit, and the night ended with me eating a small thing in order to 'prove him wrong'. </p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>Before this I had tried many times to eat properly, but I'd never last long. This is my longest time that I've managed.</p>\n<p>But, things are getting really hard right now. Every time I want to eat, it's a battle with my mind. Pros and cons are all I think about. Am I eating too much? Should I be eating? Am I sick enough. Everyday is tiring. But I had an anxiety attack yesterday, and today feels just the same. Like I am going to relapse. Like all of this is for nothing. Like I am not worth enough to eat.</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>How do I get this stupid voice to shut up? I want to be normal again so bad. But it's really hard. I don't know what to do.</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>- Nik</p></div>", "date": "26-04-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376" }, { "author": "user-id/3729", "content": "Hi ~Nik~,<br>\n<br>\nWe understand how difficult it can be to reach out for support, but we are so glad that you've done so here today. It sounds like you’ve been feeling very overwhelmed with these thoughts and feelings around eating, and we are sorry that you’re in such a tough space right now. But please know that you’re not alone in this and that our community is here to work through this difficult time with you. We also want to let you know that we are checking in with you via email.<br>\nWe hope that you keep updating the community here on your thread to let us know how you are going, whenever you feel up to it.</div>", "date": "26-04-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376" }, { "author": "user-id/25103", "content": "<p>Hey, </p>\n<p>I just wanted to inform you that I will not be able to reply to the email, as I am firstly, not comfortable with doing so, and my phone calls and such are monitored closely by my parents, which results in my not being able to do anything. Sorry.</p>\n<p>- Nik</p></div>", "date": "26-04-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376" }, { "author": "user-id/3729", "content": "Hi Nik,<br>\n<br>\nIf you would prefer, do you think you would feel up to reaching out to our Support Service through Webchat? It is available 3pm-midnight at <a href=\"https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/get-immediate-support\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/get-immediate-support</a> and one of our counsellors will be able to have a chat to you about how you have been feeling.<br>\nAnother really great option would be to reach out to Kids Helpline who have Webchat available 24/7 at <a href=\"https://kidshelpline.com.au/get-help/webchat-counselling\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://kidshelpline.com.au/get-help/webchat-counselling</a>. They will be able to support you and talk through some options with you that can help you through this. You're not alone in this. <br>\n </div>", "date": "26-04-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376" }, { "author": "user-id/25103", "content": "<p>Hey,</p>\n<p>Thank you. Yes, I would prefer this as an option. Perhaps I will check it out tomorrow.</p>\n<p>- Nik</p></div>", "date": "26-04-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376" }, { "author": "user-id/6224", "content": "<p>Hi ~Nik~</p>\n<p>Thank you for your post and I appreciate you reaching out. I hear you and can relate with the stupid voice in your head. It can feel so exhausting if it's day in and day out.</p>\n<p>I hope that you don't mind me asking; but what does a relapse look like for you? If you feel like you aren't eating enough and you decide to eat, what is the worst thing about that? Is it the ultimate fear that you might gain more weight? You don't have to answer this if you don't like, but it does help me understand a little bit about where you are at right now.</p>\n<p>For what it's worth, you do deserve to eat. I don't know you at all but I believe everyone everywhere deserves to eat. Eating helps us to stay alive, which is kind of important <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span> </p>\n<p>The other resource you could try out is The Butterfly Foundation <a href=\"https://www.thebutterflyfoundation.org.au\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">www.thebutterflyfoundation.org.au</a> They offer web-chats too. I've used them and found them super helpful and supportive.</p>\n<p>rt</p>\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "27-04-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376" }, { "author": "user-id/25103", "content": "<p>Hey,</p>\n<p>To answer your questions:</p>\n<p>A relapse to me is skipping at least two meals in a row. I occasionaly skip one because I am not hungry (or convince myself that is the case) or am having a tough time battling the voices.</p>\n<p><strong>If you feel like you aren't eating enough and you decide to eat, what is the worst thing about that?</strong></p>\n<p>the worst thing about that is probably the feeling that I don't need to eat. That I am weak if I can't resist the temptation to eat. That I'm pathetic. </p>\n<p>And yes, gaining weight. Back when I was skinny, I felt that it was the one good thing about me, that without it, I am nothing. And now that I am not skinny anymore, I feel like I am nothing. That nobody will like me. Even, that I now have to change my whole personality to fit this 'fatter' person that I am now.</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>I hope this helps. I tried to answer every question.</p>\n<p>- Nik</p></div>", "date": "27-04-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376" }, { "author": "user-id/6224", "content": "<p>Hey Nik,</p>\n<p>It's good to hear back from you and thank you for opening up. Do you have much support around you - you mentioned your friend cornflakes, but how about family - or a therapist?</p>\n<p>I can guarantee you that your worth is not based on how many kilograms you are and your worth does not change if the number changes too. But I'm guessing that you probably don't believe me which is why therapists are important!</p>\n<p>When we are hungry, we go into survival mode. Because we haven't eaten enough, all we can think about is food. I know if I'm telling myself 'I've eaten enough' but I'm still hungry I'll probably end up looking at cookbooks! - it's our own bodies way of keeping us alive.</p>\n<p>If I can suggest something, it's to eat, but even if that's just a little bit when it's time - something that doesn't feel too overwhelming if possible. That way you can try and stick to routine and avoid a relapse too. I also think it might be worth thinking about how you've coped with this in the past; are there times where you have felt worthy, or when your brain wasn't totally focused on the way you were eating? Hopefully you can use those same tools to get you through now.</p>\n<p>rt</p>\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "28-04-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376" }, { "author": "user-id/25103", "content": "<p>Hey,</p>\n<p>I do have a psychologist at the moment. Just two weeks ago I opened up about my eating problems, but she says she doesn't know much about dealing with that sorta stuff, so she's trying to find me someone who does.</p>\n<p>Ever since I can remember I have been focused on food. I love food so much. The only memories I have of holidays I went on when I was younger are the food related parts.</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>I just hate my body a lot right now, ever since I've been working to eat, because there's all this fat in places I don't want it to be, and it's really stressful.</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>I'm often scared I am eating too much, because all of the media about healthy living, and working out and stuff like that. I want a skinny body like my sister has. She used to excersize 5 times a week, and she has such a flat stomach, it makes me seem like a blob compared to her.</p>\n<p> </p>\n<p>- Nik</p></div>", "date": "29-04-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376" }, { "author": "user-id/6224", "content": "<p>Hey Nik,</p>\n<p>Oh- well that's a bummer. I wouldn't have thought you'd have to be referred out from a psychologist. Has she been able to see you in the meantime or offer you some support?</p>\n<p>I really love food too. It's awesome. I'm really glad that you have some positive memories there.</p>\n<p>If there's one thing I know about eating problems is that it's never about the food. I know you wrote that you don't like your body - have you had some experiences there that made things this way? Why is it that you get the sense that you are nothing if you aren't at a certain weight anymore?</p>\n<p>Gosh the media is so terrible for its messaging and 'ideals' of who we should be and what we should look like. I'm female so I know there's differences but there's still a push that we aren't enough. While I know that it's getting to you, do try and remember that they literally profit of making us feel crap in our body.</p>\n<p>rt</p></div>", "date": "30-04-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relapse-to-disordered-eating/td-p/434376" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/43632", "content": "<p>I’m just wondering is anyone has had any experience with CBT to treat severe health anxiety? My husband is at his breaking point and I’m hoping someone has had a positive experience or suggestions as he’s losing all hope at living a normal life. Appreciate any advice anyone has that may help at all </p></div>", "date": "20-07-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/severe-health-anxiety/td-p/540703" }, { "author": "user-id/40420", "content": "<p>Hello Sophie7339,</p><p> </p><p>I am so sorry to hear your husband is going through such a difficult time with health anxiety. </p><p> </p><p>Is he currently seeing a professional for his mental health who has suggested this type of treatment? Or are you still exploring options and are curious about what method to seek out?</p><p> </p><p>In my experience, I have used CBT in various ways to help my anxiety, including for health related worries. Everyone is different and responds to things differently so there is no right or wrong answer but certainly for me, it was a helpful method.</p></div>", "date": "20-07-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/severe-health-anxiety/td-p/540703" }, { "author": "user-id/22474", "content": "<p>Hey Sophie7339</p><p> </p><p>Welcome to the forums. </p><p> </p><p>Is your husband open to receiving MH support? <br>Has he made an appointment with his GP to talk over how he's feeling? Quite often a GP is the first place to begin, by getting a Mental Health Care Plan and discuss medications if the GP sees this as an appropriate path. </p><p> </p><p>Also please encourage your husband to call the Beyond Blue Helpline. He can open up to the Counsellor on the line, get some direction and also ask for referrals they suggest for him in areas close to your home. <br>Although so many therapists are available via Zoom, so if he is comfortable with this, it's worth a try. </p><p> </p><p>CBT may help your H. There are no guarantees that any specific method will cure a patient. <br>If there were, we'd all be healed. </p><p>I think it's important to know that if HE is open and motivated to receive support and deeply desires to alleviate the anxiety he feels, it's not an overnight cure, but there IS HOPE. </p><p> </p><p>Wishing you and your husband the very best, <br>EM</p></div>", "date": "20-07-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/severe-health-anxiety/td-p/540703" }, { "author": "user-id/25170", "content": "<p>Hi Sophie7339,</p><p> </p><p>Thanks for reaching out and I’m sorry to hear that your husband is experiencing severe health anxiety.</p><p> </p><p>Please know that it really is possible for your husband to recover from this condition with the correct help from health professionals.</p><p> </p><p>I have a lived experience of severe anxiety OCD but my condition started with myself obsessing over my health.</p><p> </p><p>Id find something on my body I thought was wrong I’d obsess to the point of thinking worse case scenario…. ( I’d catastrophonise)…… I’d google symptoms….. this would only make things worse and then I’d go to the doctor have it checked and be told I was fine but this didn’t stop me from obsessing over it….. I would think maybe the doctor got it wrong ect………. I was stuck in a spiral that drove my anxiety up to severe levels. It was a nightmare to live that way.</p><p> </p><p>Along my journey I was diagnosed with severe anxiety OCD this led me to a clinic that specialised in OCD this is were I learned to master my OCD.</p><p> </p><p>Ive been out of this vicious spiral for nearly 5 years.</p><p> </p><p>Im not saying your husband has OCD but do you think he could be stuck in vicious thinking cycle?</p><p> </p><p>The therapy I did was Metacognitive Therapy this therapy changed my life for the positive.</p><p> </p><p>Please ask me anything </p><p> </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "21-07-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/severe-health-anxiety/td-p/540703" }, { "author": "user-id/48315", "content": "<p>Hello I am so sorry to hear that your husband is going through such a hard time. I also suffer from medical anxiety. I am currently on a program through an organization called this way up it was recommended by my psychologist, and they have a online program that helps with medical anxiety It is pretty easy to follow, but it can be very confronting, especially if you are having severe symptoms and would definitely recommend the guidance of a psychologist while undertaking the program I wish you and your husband all the best.</p></div>", "date": "19-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/severe-health-anxiety/td-p/540703" }, { "author": "user-id/48315", "content": "<p>Hi Petal, </p><p> </p><p>I would like the opportunity to have a discussion with you in regards to your treatment. I also suffer from medical anxiety the past 12 months have been incredibly difficult as my symptoms have become unbearable to the point that I am off work. I am also struggling with depression and panic attacks but know that the medical anxiety is the underlying issue that I need to deal with. I am currently doing a course through this way up. I am finding it helpful, but would love any suggestions on different therapy options I’m so glad to hear that you have been able to have such a great improvement and it gives me hope.</p></div>", "date": "19-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/severe-health-anxiety/td-p/540703" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/47551", "content": "<p>I have suffered from health anxiety and OCD for over 7 years. I am going through a particularly rough time and can't seem to see the light at the end of the tunnel. <br>I am seeing a phycologist and together we have decided it's best if I try antidepressants. My GP appointment is a week away and I read that it can take weeks or months to start seeing results. <br>In the meantime I am exercising, meditating and doing everything I can to calm my nerves but nothing helps. <br><br>Could someone please tell me that things are going to get better? </p></div>", "date": "24-05-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety-ocd/td-p/566213" }, { "author": "user-id/11269", "content": "<p>Hi Molly</p><p>OCD is a real challenge and so is health anxiety, I know (my daughter also has both). I’m really sorry that you are experiencing these conditions. Hugs to you.</p><p>To answer your question: yes, things can get better for you. Medication can be very effective for both conditions, particularly in combination with CBT. I have seen the positive impact of medication with my daughter. <span>She didn’t have much luck with our GP and medication though. She first had a paediatrician manage her medication and now a psychiatrist. I’m not suggesting you will have the same experience, just something to consider.</span></p><p>Your medication may take around six weeks to kick in, but this is something you can discuss with your doctor. I would encourage you to also have a conversation about potential side effects. <br>I know you’re tired and waiting is really hard, but you just hang in there. Exercising and meditating are great strategies, as is seeking support. Post here any time if you need to vent or want to talk some more.<br>Kind thoughts to you </p></div>", "date": "24-05-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety-ocd/td-p/566213" }, { "author": "user-id/47551", "content": "<p>Thank you, Summer Rose. I appreciate you giving me some hope. <br>It must be hard to watch your daughter go through this, it sounds like you're a great mum she is lucky to have you. <br>I have made a double appointment with my Gp to go through potential side effects and so on. I know that I might be in for a roller coaster when finding the right ones but will keep your experience consider a psychiatrist if needed. </p><p> </p><p>I really appreciate your support, thank you. </p></div>", "date": "25-05-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety-ocd/td-p/566213" }, { "author": "user-id/11269", "content": "<p>Hi Molly</p><p>Good idea to book the double appointment. If you have someone close to you it might also pay to let them know what you’re doing, so they can be on the lookout for any changes in your behaviour (positive or negative).</p><p>The first medication my girl tried was unhelpful, but the second came to be very beneficial.  It can be trial and error and it’s demoralising when something doesn’t work, but you just have to plough on. It can get better.</p><p>Yes, it is hard watching someone you love suffer but I am honoured to be her mother. She is the bravest person I know and I am so very proud of her. <br>She fell very ill at age 13 and was hospitalised. She fought her way back, graduated high school and went on to university. She fell in love, traveled Europe and worked part time along the way. Covid lockdowns were devastating and she is fighting her way back again. She will do it. And so can you. It can get better. <br>Kind thoughts to you</p><p> </p></div>", "date": "25-05-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety-ocd/td-p/566213" }, { "author": "user-id/47551", "content": "<p> </p><p>Thank you. My husband has been really supportive, it might be a good idea to bring him along to the appointment so he is aware of what to expect. <br><br>Thank you so much for sharing your daughters story, she is an inspiration (you both are). I wish her all the best in her recovery this time around.</p><p> </p><p>I appreciate you responding, you have given me hope. Thank you </p></div>", "date": "25-05-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety-ocd/td-p/566213" }, { "author": "user-id/1312", "content": "<p>Hello Molly</p><p>I'm sorry you, like me, are suffering from anxiety. Don't give up hope, I'm sure it will get better. </p><p>Unfortunately, it takes time, there doesn't seem to be a quick fix.</p><p>Good idea to take your husband with you to the appointment. </p><p>Here is a website I have found in my search for relief from anxiety. </p><p>Just google 'GAD-Specialists'. They have given me some tips which made some difference to the problem.</p><p>I hope it will help you too.</p><p> </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "26-05-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety-ocd/td-p/566213" }, { "author": "user-id/47551", "content": "<p>Thank you for you support Mr Ploppy. I will check the website out now, great to hear that it has helped you. <br><br></p><p>Thanks again </p></div>", "date": "27-05-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety-ocd/td-p/566213" }, { "author": "user-id/48315", "content": "<p>Things are going to get better you just have to be patient. I know it’s hard I struggle with health anxiety as well and it is excruciating at times I know that it’s not easy I have recently started taking anti-depressants for mine and it did take a little bit of time to start helping it’s definitely not a miracle cure But certainly has helped getting the dosage right and the right medication for you can take a little bit of time but is most definitely worth it. I find swimming and drawing or any repetitive activity that allows my mind to escape for a little while helpful. Also breathing exercises can be helpful as well . Hang in there and don’t be too hard on yourself. There is hope. </p></div>", "date": "19-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/health-anxiety-ocd/td-p/566213" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48262", "content": "<p>Hi , just wanting to reach out and ask a couple of questions . <br><br></p><p>I have severe health anxiety which I have had for a long time but is now so much worse . <br><br></p><p>I have been on antidepressants for 15 years same one . Has any body been on medication for this and felt not working anymore ? <br>can your body get us to it and need a change ? <br><br></p><p>just interested if anyone else has felt or been thru this and changed meds . <br>did it help ? <br><br></p><p>thank u <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":smiling_face_with_smiling_eyes:\">😊</span> </p></div>", "date": "16-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/medication-for-severe-health-anxiety/td-p/570315" }, { "author": "user-id/3729", "content": "Hi B4, <br>\nThank you for sharing today. We can't encourage specific medications or provide medical advice here, but we hope our community can discuss their lived experience on this topic. Remember that for the best possible guidance your GP is your best resource. You can also call Health Direct for any questions regarding medications and side effects. If you need further support today please reach out to us directly on 1300 22 3646 or use<br>\nour webchat to speak to one of our counsellors online: <a href=\"https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support</a> .<br>\nThanks again for sharing. We hope you'll hear back from the lovely community in response to your post sometime today and that there's some comfort in that for you. <br>\n<br>\nKind regards,<br>\nSophie M<br>\n </div>", "date": "16-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/medication-for-severe-health-anxiety/td-p/570315" }, { "author": "user-id/48315", "content": "<p>Hello I also suffer from severe health anxiety and have for many years, but only recently started medication so I can’t give you much feedback in regards to your medication question but I would love to have a chat with you in regards to how you deal with your symptoms in general I haven’t actually ever spoken to anybody else that has the health anxiety like myself </p></div>", "date": "19-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/medication-for-severe-health-anxiety/td-p/570315" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/47740", "content": "<p>We as a community need to keep positive and try to focus on the things that keep us focused on the things that bring us love and joy in our lives. You know I can choose to be negative I have 3 disability condition but I choose to keep walking and realise if I focus on the things I can control and not what I can't then I can keep a powerful positive perspective on life.</p><p> </p><p>If you focus on the things that make you happy and bring you back to health. I understand it is a struggle with your disabilities but I think the most important thing is a positive mind set. The thing is if you focus outside yourself and get focused in your community and possibly look to doing volenteering and think about who can I help in my community. I use to work as a volenteer in a soup kitchen making coffee and meals for the poor and underprivaleged and importantly I thought about others and what others where going through.</p><p> </p><p>It is not right to be selfish and not think about others in your community?</p><p> </p><p>I learnt when I was serving meals in the soup kitchens I understood by just talking to people asking them how there day was and just having a conversation and looking outside myself and caring for someone else. I think talking to someone and cooking them a meal and asking them how there day went it is important.</p><p> </p><p>I believe in life you need to be a giver to the community and say what do people in my community need and say how can I help others .</p><p> </p><p>It starts with loving and supporting your parents and doing your your chiors everyday to this day I still pack the dishwasher and put my clothing on the line.</p><p> </p><p>It is important in life to be a simpilton be humble, loving and kind to all and never stand in judgment of and be critical of people you don't know. The simple act of making food and serving others is something you must live by.</p><p> </p><p>There are many ways you can serve the community you just have to find out what are you good at and what is my passion what makes me happy and follow what you passionate about.My passion to cooking for the family and spending time at home. You might even be a great artist it is important to do what makes you happy and what bring you peace.</p><p> </p><p>Everybody has there own passion and there own skill which they hone on and get better at. Look to what you love to do. It could be building or making things by braking them apart and putting them back together.</p><p> </p><p>Everyone has there passion and there special skill you just have to find it?</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "16-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/the-power-of-perspective-and-looking-at-the-positive-side-of/td-p/570301" }, { "author": "user-id/43202", "content": "<p>Thanks for your thoughtful post.</p><p>i think we have things we like but whether we all have a soevial is another thing. <br>i think we need to do something one enjoys. </p></div>", "date": "18-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/the-power-of-perspective-and-looking-at-the-positive-side-of/td-p/570301" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48268", "content": "<p>Hello everyone unsure if anyone can relate just been to docs tonight who thinks I have anxiety. Has anyone suffered from IBS from their anxiety? I have a lot going on in my life I’m studying working full aswell and I have 5 children of my own! I feel like maybe I have too much on my plate but at the same time it’s nice to be working toward something is there anyone out there feeling the same as me ? Im so exhausted all the time and I have next to no patience feeling lost and like I’m not good enough for anyone I have a loving husband very supportive so that no issue! I just don’t know what to do ! </p></div>", "date": "16-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/first-time-with-anxiety/td-p/570351" }, { "author": "user-id/10213", "content": "<p>I've suffered indigestion problems as a result of being ostracised by formerly friendly neighbours after a petty incident. Every time I would walk out the front door they would turn their backs on me. This went on for months. Once I made a mental decision to ignore them, the anxiety and indigestion subsided.</p></div>", "date": "16-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/first-time-with-anxiety/td-p/570351" }, { "author": "user-id/38654", "content": "<p>Hi kimstar,</p><p> </p><p>I am sorry to hear you are experiencing anxiety and IBS symptoms. Anxiety can definitely impact your gut in many ways, your mind is connected to it in ways medicine doesn't fully understand yet. Your mind and body are interconnected, so more often than not, when your mental health is off, you might find your body responds to that as well. </p><p> </p><p>What did the doctor propose as the next steps? Did they refer you to a psychologist? Meds? These are the most appropriate next steps in taking control of this anxiety, seeing a psychologist might really help you. It helped me a lot. If you get your anxiety under control, you might find that your IBS improves too.</p><p> </p><p>It seems like you have a lot going on as you say! Bring busy and juggling a lot of responsibilities can definitely get the better of us - but just make sure you have a healthy balance with self-care too. Take some time for yourself every once and a while - e.g., is there a night where someone can look after the kids so you and your husband can have a night away etc??</p><p> </p><p>Having no patience is a sign of burnout, so just make sure you are maintaining self-care to get you through this busy time in your life. Lean on your husband if needed too.</p><p> </p><p>I hope you start to feel better soon,</p><p>Jaz xx</p></div>", "date": "17-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/first-time-with-anxiety/td-p/570351" }, { "author": "user-id/47893", "content": "<p>Hi kinstar,</p><p>Hope youre doing ok today. Yes, I have anxiety and IBS (amongst other things). I think whatever is affecting us mentally, impacts on us physically eventually as well</p></div>", "date": "17-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/first-time-with-anxiety/td-p/570351" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48266", "content": "<p>Hi,</p><p>hoping I can connect with anyone who’s been in a similar circumstance. I have recently been the victim of a cyber crime involving a fraudulent investment scheme. I discovered relatively quickly and have put measures in place to prevent further loss. I did however, get as far as providing a significant amount of personal information and I’m now terrified about what will be done with it. I cannot stop thinking about worst case scenarios like cybercriminals having my address and knowing that I have children. Will they try to abduct my kids? I cannot sleeps from this fear. I am constantly sick to my stomach <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":loudly_crying_face:\">😭</span> I never thought this would happen to me. </p></div>", "date": "16-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/investment-scam-identity-theft/td-p/570348" }, { "author": "user-id/48263", "content": "<p>Scams are frightening, can you report it. Maybe change passwords. I hope you can get some rest. </p></div>", "date": "16-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/investment-scam-identity-theft/td-p/570348" }, { "author": "user-id/48266", "content": "<p>Thanks for the reply Rose. I have reported it and locked up all my accounts, cancelled cards, notified banks and police, ordered replacement licence etc. I’m just still so terrified of what they will do with my information. Honestly my only worry is they will come for my kids. They never threaten that or anything, but I jump straight to worst case. They can try to take my money but nothing of value is linked to the credit card they have. My only worry second to my kids, is that they will run up a debt in my name and I’ll have to foot the bill which will probably cripple my marriage. </p></div>", "date": "16-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/investment-scam-identity-theft/td-p/570348" }, { "author": "user-id/44313", "content": "<p>Hi KP2300,</p><p>I'm really sorry this has happened to you.</p><p> </p><p>If you've locked your accounts then there shouldn't be any other way they can get money out of you. It sounds as though you've gone through the proper steps to ensuring it stops here.</p><p> </p><p>Something to note is these scammers aren't hardened criminals; yes they're criminals for sure but scams like this often come from impoverished and desperate individuals overseas. What I'm getting at is without a shadow of a doubt, your family will be safe and they aren't coming for you. They solely wish to exploit people for their hard earned money. The information they have on you doesn't have much value if they can't make money off you anymore.</p><p> </p><p>Be sure to change your passwords and when you do get a new pin number, perhaps just make it different from the last to be safe.</p><p> </p><p>My heart goes out to you and I really hope your situation improves. Hope this has eased some of your worries. It'll get better <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":red_heart:\">❤️</span></p></div>", "date": "17-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/investment-scam-identity-theft/td-p/570348" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48008", "content": "<p>I’m currently waiting to see someone for help with my mood swings and images in my head. In small group and online I’m naturally a talker. Finding am wanting to talk about how I’m feeling in hope of getting it out of my system or easing the pain. Have never done before but am wondering if writing or typing in some type of journal my fears, anxiety, emotions might help.</p><p>has anyone done similar?  If so, did it help?</p></div>", "date": "30-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/journal/td-p/569104/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/48008", "content": "<p>Hi Croix,</p><p> </p><p>not sure I have one favourite song, my choice of songs, singers and even genre change depending on my mood.  One group I am drawn to when feeling low is Human Nature.  Something in the tone of their voices speaks to my inner core and lifts my spirits.  The Seekers with Judith Durham is another group I like listening to especially Morningtown Ride …. as a young child remember asking to listen to this song.</p><p>Im staying tossing around ideas for documenting my days in the journal.  Happy to accept any thoughts people have as part of this thought process.  Definitely know I will not write up every day individually.  At the moment having to make decisions what furniture etc I will/can take with me when move to new home in few months.  Lots of hard emotional decisions to be made as am downsizing and will not have space for everything.  Some of my current struggles focus around the emotional attachment to items I have inherited or been given.  Logic at times wins but not often.  Couple weeks ago decisions were led by logic and decisions made to sell etc certain items.  Items are still sitting in same location to current day with only very small number of items dealt with.  Trying to do logic 2year rule but emotions over ride and I end up recoiling to my safety zone.</p><p> </p><p>Patches</p></div>", "date": "04-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/journal/td-p/569104/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/31621", "content": "<p>Hi Patches,</p><p> </p><p>Thank you for keeping us updated - it's truly inspiring! You're taking brave and decisive steps forward, and that's something you should be very proud of.</p><p> </p><p>Just keep going with what's working for you treatment-wise, and make sure to spend time on stuff you love like music and crafting (super cool hobbies by the way!). Keep on writing down your thoughts and exploring who you are.</p><p> </p><p>Every bit of progress, no matter how big or small, is worth celebrating. You're doing a remarkable job, and we're here to cheer you on.</p><p> </p><p>Feel free to update us anytime. We always look forward to hearing from you.<br>Mark</p></div>", "date": "05-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/journal/td-p/569104/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/10213", "content": "<p>Writing about past experiences has helped me. It help give me perspective, especially grievances or loss/grief. It helps put words to your thoughts and is kind of therapeutic. I've written about my childhood up until now (46) with different things I've done and sometimes let trusted people read it. </p></div>", "date": "05-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/journal/td-p/569104/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/48008", "content": "<p>I’ve spent most of today doing rough timeline of date, couple word description and have gone on to describe detail of events, feelings and things I remember of events which have been traumatic and/or caused extreme upset.</p><p>some parts very emotional but feeling better within myself for pushing through and getting it down in writing.</p><p>tomorrow is day to give brain a break.  I like doing jigsaws and have recently found out about jigsaw library about 1hr drive from me in small country town, library opens couple hours once each month with cost of 40 cents per jigsaw that is borrowed.  Am looking forward to the country drive plus hoping to bring one or 2 jigsaws home to start to do over the weekend.</p><p> </p><p>Patches</p></div>", "date": "05-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/journal/td-p/569104/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/32332", "content": "<p>Dear Patches~</p><p>It sounds as if you have relived a whole bunch of experiences all at the one time. I'd imagine that would have been very taxing, and giving yourself a break tomorrow sounds most sensible.</p><p> </p><p>Hopefully when you fill in you journal in the future it will only be abut one episode at a time</p><p> </p><p>The drive and jigsaws seems like a pretty good remedy. When you are doing a jigsaw do you listen to a podcast, audio-book, music or similar so you have two interests at once? I tend to do that with repetitive tasks, and find my enjoyment greatly enhanced.</p><p> </p><p>Mowing is a good example where I\"m sitting on the machine and steering. It does not take up much thought, and listening to the <em>Science Report</em> or some other podcast at the  same time is great.</p><p> </p><p>Croix</p></div>", "date": "05-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/journal/td-p/569104/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/48008", "content": "<p>Music, definitely music Croix.  At times I pull out some my kids theme dvds and play, more so to listen to than watch eg Shrek, Ice Age.</p><p>quick scan over what I wrote yesterday …. It’s going for become my messy draft.  <br>Grief counselling years ago the counselling asked if was possible to give some rough timeline of events ie trying to talk through things from oldest to more recent.</p><p>a week and I have first psych appointment and thought I would like to have semi timeline of events.  To try to do it in my head I can’t, even at best of times my thoughts tend to jump around, I can start talking about one topic, be part way through and then realise I’m talking about totally something different, some times totally unrelated.  Been doing it for decades by now, know IDo it and doesn’t worry me.  Most of my relatives can’t cope with it and think I’m doing it deliberately just to annoy them. Possibly one reason I have almost nothing to do with majority of my relatives.  <br>back to my initial thoughts …. Thought if I could write down in rough timeline some info, memories, feelings etc about the events during the ast approx 50 years that this might be helpful when starting to chat with psych.</p><p>It was draining but had great night sleep and feeling bit better within myself this morning.</p><p> </p><p>sun in shining and looks lovely outside, time to pluck up some courage and go for a drive</p><p> </p><p>Patches</p></div>", "date": "06-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/journal/td-p/569104/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/48008", "content": "<p>During this last week I’ve been redoing first section of my journal.  Started off with one page summarising date and few words about each different event.  Have then been taking my time, writing down everything I can remember.  </p><p>first psych appointment yesterday and took my journal.  Psych took photo of the pages containing timeline. First hr long appointment and we have briefly chatted about approx first third of events.  Next appointment in 2 weeks, few days after second Somatic Experiences Equine Assisted Therapy.</p><p> </p><p>Patches</p></div>", "date": "15-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/journal/td-p/569104/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/32332", "content": "<p>Dear Patches~</p><p>That all sounds pretty hopeful. I\"d not worry overmuch about getting the timeline exact. I can't, even after so many years. There are things that loom in the mind, and thay can easily be out of the wrong time.</p><p> </p><p>I had a funny expereice a while ago when I met up with someone I'd served with and found our recollections of events did not match in places. I'm sure the other person was correct, but some people and events I did not remember at all, and others were out of place.</p><p> </p><p>That only applied withing a certain number of years up to my invalidity retirement and for a while after.  Later on things are much more orderly.</p><p> </p><p>Do you find re-writing those pages in your journal are ok to do?</p><p> </p><p>Croix</p></div>", "date": "16-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/journal/td-p/569104/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/48008", "content": "<p>Hi Croix,</p><p> </p><p>I have a head knowledge of what you mentioned about events in the past.  My late husband served in Navy for couple decades.  Would listen to him and his best ex Navy mate talk about different things, neither remember exactly same things.</p><p>I suffer from Order OCD, only way my brain felt fairly settled was taking fair portion of one day getting time line accurate as possible. Mainly focused on the year apart from few times when multiple events happened with 12 to 18 month period.  Wrote with spare line between each entry and found add couple of events due to some adverts on tv triggering memories.</p><p>Ive been taking my time and writing for no more than 30 minutes each day or second day whilst expanding on each event. So much detail of different events I feel I’ve disassociated from, can calmly write the things I’m remembering and seeing in my mind but feels like I’m watching on and that it’s not something I went through.</p><p>have taken last couple days away from journal.  Yesterday went to a community market which involved approx 1hr drive one way</p><p> </p><p>Patches</p></div>", "date": "16-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/journal/td-p/569104/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/48008", "content": "<p>I’m currently waiting to see someone for help with my mood swings and images in my head. In small group and online I’m naturally a talker. Finding am wanting to talk about how I’m feeling in hope of getting it out of my system or easing the pain. Have never done before but am wondering if writing or typing in some type of journal my fears, anxiety, emotions might help.</p><p>has anyone done similar?  If so, did it help?</p></div>", "date": "30-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/journal/td-p/569104" }, { "author": "user-id/48066", "content": "<p>Ive just started, it helps. I started writing random throughts, drew a line under some things and kept writing, not looking back, felt liberating</p></div>", "date": "30-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/journal/td-p/569104" }, { "author": "user-id/32332", "content": "<p>Dear Patches63~</p><p>Yes I've kept a journal which lasted on and off for several years and yes it did help, though it was not as straightforward as I first thought.</p><p> </p><p>Keeping at it every day was a chore, and I did not always do so, though if things were bad I'd make an effort and try. Setting things down did help to keep them in proportion and the actual writing served as a distraction. Unfortunately when things were good I'd neglect the writing which meant over time the whole thing was too far out of balance, with the world portrayed as mostly bad.</p><p> </p><p>There were a couple of positive spin-offs, the first being I had an accurate record of the down times to give ot my psych, and that would give an overall trend. The second was if I looked in it I could find things that had helped -a walk, a book, a talk etc which I'd forgotten about.</p><p> </p><p>If you would prefer an electronic version on your phone you may find something here as a starting point</p><p> </p><p><a href=\"https://www.blackdoginstitute.org.au/resources-support/digital-tools-apps/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://www.blackdoginstitute.org.au/resources-support/digital-tools-apps/</a></p><p> </p><p><a href=\"https://au.reachout.com/tools-and-apps\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://au.reachout.com/tools-and-apps</a></p><p> </p><p>Hope that helps</p><p> </p><p>Croix</p></div>", "date": "30-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/journal/td-p/569104" }, { "author": "user-id/31621", "content": "<p>Hi Patches63,</p><p> </p><p>It certainly helps. Journaling encourages self-reflection and introspection. When I write about my experiences and thoughts, I feel that I gain a deeper understanding of myself, my possible triggers, and patterns of thinking. This self-awareness helps me identify sources of anxiety. And as long as I understand myself better, the anxiety is eased.</p><p> </p><p>In addition, for a while I was journaling and seeing a psychologist regularly. I found that because of journaling, I was able to describe my mental state to the psychologist in a wider and deeper way, which greatly helped the him in his analysis.</p><p> </p><p>Mark</p></div>", "date": "01-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/journal/td-p/569104" }, { "author": "user-id/48008", "content": "<p>Thanks everyone for the information and encouragement.  At times find myself doubting what I do including is it beneficial or am I just wasting time and causing myself more pain.</p><p> </p><p>Mark Z you mentioned possible triggers. This is something I know I hope to get some help with and how to better cope with the impact of my triggers.  I’m aware of some of my triggers due to events within last approx 5 years for which when I reached out for help was left no better and illusioned.  <br><br></p><p>thanks for those links Croix, will have a look at them over the weekend when I know I’m in best current head space.  <br><br></p><p>Patches</p></div>", "date": "01-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/journal/td-p/569104" }, { "author": "user-id/31621", "content": "<p>Hi Patches63,</p><p> </p><p>Thanks for your feedback. When you say you reached out for help but was left no better and illusioned, do you want to share this story? We might be able to share some experience or give some advice.</p><p> </p><p>Mark</p></div>", "date": "03-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/journal/td-p/569104" }, { "author": "user-id/48008", "content": "<p>Sure Mark.   I was working full time at the time and contacted Employee Access Program, explained exactly what was happening in my life at that time, areas I knew I was struggling and requested to be referred to some one to help me with coping mechanisms.  I had already spoken to gp I was seeing at that time who I felt wasn’t supportive.  <br>time line blurs to some degree.  My husband had been diagnosed with terminal cancer and was starting to spend almost as much time in hospital as he was home.  wasn’t coping from grief aspect. Even one delay in his release from hospital once left me extremely upset.</p><p>clearly explained on patient info sheet plus verbally in first session I knew I needed help with coping mechanisms.  First and every session was the same, counsellor asking me about me week and saying we would meet following week to give me hour away from everything to talk.  When I asked about coping mechanisms/strategies to help deal with things was told would focus on them the following week but never happened. Attended 3 sessions coming away feeling I could have spoken to my supportive manager and felt same.  Contacted Employee Assistance Program and requested to be referred to some one else, when they phoned back my husband was fading quickly and was only short while before his final days.  <br> stress flares up some of my physical health issues.  Knowing this and already starting to struggle in that area I spoke to gp who told me nothing he would do meds wise until I had gone through counselling.  Felt was trapped in endless circle.  Counselling was never offered to my husband or myself through cancer section of local hospital. Looking back I never asked but, due to my husband having almost gone to ICU within few weeks after diagnosis I was focusing on one day at a time</p></div>", "date": "03-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/journal/td-p/569104" }, { "author": "user-id/31621", "content": "<p>Hi Patches63, </p><p> </p><p>I'm really sorry to hear about what you were going through. It sounds incredibly tough, and it's totally okay to feel overwhelmed. You were doing such as amazing job to try to access different supports, I'm sorry that they didn't work for you.</p><p> </p><p>If your GP isn't giving you what you need, there's no harm in getting a second opinion. You need to look after your mental health just as much as your physical health. It is the same with your counselor. If the one you've been seeing hasn't helped, it's fine to tell the program why and ask for another counselor who suits you better.</p><p> </p><p>I think you can also try other types of support. For example support groups, such as GriefLine - They provide counselling support services free of charge to individuals and families experiencing loss and grief. You can call them at 1300 845 745.</p><p> </p><p>It will also be a good idea to give a call to BeyondBlue hotline 1300 224 636 (24/7) to talk to a professional for cope strategies and supporting resources.</p><p> </p><p>Do take care of yourself. Do little things that help you relax. Try deep breathing, going for a walk, or anything else that helps you chill out. And don't forget to rest, eat well, and do stuff you enjoy when you can.</p><p> </p><p>Hope everything will be better.</p><p>Mark</p></div>", "date": "04-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/journal/td-p/569104" }, { "author": "user-id/48008", "content": "<p>Thanks Mark.</p><p> </p><p>Couple days I spoke to BB on call counsellor and had a good chat.  She has sent me information and links to list of professionals who provide Somatic Experiences(SE) or EMDR.  <br>yesterday I spoke to woman in nearby area who provides SE Equine Therapy, have completed extensive questionaire you sent me and waiting to hear back.  She also advised me of another provider of SE Equine Therapy who is approx 1hr drive from me.</p><p>Last counselling I received which I feel was beneficial to me was grief counselling approx 15 years ago.  Speaking to BB counsellor she said she believes that due to me now being retired from work, even though my nervous system is on high alert, that the impact of multiple unresolved trauma events are no impacting on me.</p><p>I’m not much of an outdoor person.  I used to enjoy drives through the country side and drives down to the coast, issues with being scared of trucks plus petrol prices is making it harder to do these.  I’m a music and craft person, people who don’t know don’t understand why I have quite sizeable collection of music related cds, mainly with songs from 50’s to 80’s.</p><p>yesterday I found and bought the notebook I want to use for my journal. As I shared with younger cousin with whom we had great relationship growing up (with me being an only child and her only having brothers, we were raised that we are closest to being sisters that’s possible) and semi still do, my thoughts for journal are 1) naming every traumatic event and recording how I remember it made me feel etc 2) notes/dot points for feelings/struggles plus positive/happy things, target being at least couple days each week. 3) writing letters to people who have already died where there is emotional upset linked to both positive and negative memories.</p><p>grief counsellor years ago suggested trying journal and/or letters and I couldn’t do it.</p><p>I’ve also taken note of details of professional who provides SE that is not Equine Therapy linked as another possible for getting help.  <br><br></p><p>Patches</p></div>", "date": "04-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/journal/td-p/569104" }, { "author": "user-id/32332", "content": "<p>Dear Patches~</p><p>That sounds pretty positive and gives things to hope for</p><p> </p><p>I found with the journal it helped upon re-reading if after describing how badly I felt I also tried to record what made me feel better -at that specific time. I know you plan on including positive and happy things but having something good at the end of a passage of bad does give a resource and hope.</p><p> </p><p>I can very much understand your choice of music as I am particularly fond of those times, in fact I think my favorite song is \"Windmills of your Mind\" from the late 60's</p><p> </p><p>SE Equine Therapy sounds most interesting and I've heard good things about it.</p><p> </p><p>Please let us know how you go</p><p> </p><p>Croix</p></div>", "date": "04-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/journal/td-p/569104" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48221", "content": "<p>Hi Guys,</p><p>I would like to share some of my experiences living with the diagnosed and treated ADHD.</p><p>I hold vivid memories of the moments or rejection, and division between me and co-workers, ones they became aware that I am on ADHD medication or, (medication which they call substance). From this moment onwards I am not longer, quiet, a bit withdrawn middle-aged woman, with no special features apart from looking a bit arty and with her head in the cloud. To their perception I am a drug addict, an outcast with unknown past, surrounded by heavy tapestry of distrusts and bigotries, capable of cruel things.</p><p>In all my employment engagements the pivotal moment of staff awareness of my condition or suspicion of medication is always followed by the exclusion, and rejection from the public service workforce.</p><p>The interval time between the discovery and exclusion, carry the heavy burden of bullying, intimidations, accusations, and vilifications. Inability to break the cycle of rejection is even more amplified with each effort of joining workforce, in the snowball effect of picking more allegations, and disparagements.</p><p>Not only the public service is rejecting me, but with the latest contract for the non-profit organisation, I am discovering that the disparaging reputation snowball is taking shape of the criminal characteristic, with the new employer treating me not only like I am person using substance/on medication but somehow <em>criminal</em>.</p><p>There is absolutely no reason for that and presenting all WWVP card, police check, baseline security clearance has no effect on achieving better employment outcome. I am progressively becoming hopeless, with each rejection from workforce to the point that the push to exclude ADHD people on medication like me, could have the consequences of relegating me to the edge of society, with no rights to live and survive.</p><p>I am acutely aware how devastating is to watch this spectacle of existence failure by my 15 years daughter, who is smart and beautiful. It is breaking my hart, that the prejudices are forming the forces unable to overcome with the skills, abilities, and personal qualities I am offering.</p><p>None of that has any value once the employer is faced with revelation of ADHD disability and possibility of using medication.</p><p>I am running out of strength to do the regular marathon of complaining to Fair Work Commission, Human Right Commission claiming disability discrimination in workplace.</p><p>I do not believe that could be another person like me, who is not enduring the same vilification treatment in public service when diagnosed and treated for ADHD.</p></div>", "date": "13-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/diagnosed-and-treated-adhd-vilification-in-workplace/td-p/570043" }, { "author": "user-id/46728", "content": "<p>Hi Angie,<br><br>I am so sorry that you are going through this. It must be so tough to feel this rejection time and time again. Employers legally can not discriminate based on disability or mental health status, unless there is a specific reason, such as safety or inherent requirements of the job. I hope you find some support through the Fair work etc. Certainly, ADHD medication is not an illicit substance.<br><br>Navigating ADHD in our society is difficult, as we still hold the stigma of the \"naughty kid in school\". Add to that the difficulty in actually getting a diagnosis as a woman; I'm not surprised you are feeling worn out. Please do not give up; you are not alone. Have you considered looking for employment in a place that is more open to creative expression?</p></div>", "date": "13-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/diagnosed-and-treated-adhd-vilification-in-workplace/td-p/570043" }, { "author": "user-id/48221", "content": "<p>Hi Ehmel, It is really warm to my heart to read your reply, and give me some hope. I am very grateful for that.</p><p>I came to terms, that there is irreversible damage, which could not be undone in this life. I will keep trying to find something remotely. I agree with you that sometimes, is not only about the adjustments we have to do to belong, but make an effort in finding the places which we know would accept us. Thank you for allowing me to see the light in the tunnel. <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":smiling_face_with_smiling_eyes:\">😊</span></p></div>", "date": "14-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/diagnosed-and-treated-adhd-vilification-in-workplace/td-p/570043" }, { "author": "user-id/46728", "content": "<p>Hi Angie,<br><br>I'm glad I could help a little.<br><br>Take Care <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span></p></div>", "date": "16-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/diagnosed-and-treated-adhd-vilification-in-workplace/td-p/570043" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48183", "content": "<p>Hi this is my first time posting I’ve had a long journey with depression on and off but major depression this year not really responding to medication My biggest and scariest issue is my thoughts I can’t turn them off no matter how hard I try it’s awful They are all about my past and are totally random stories no relevance I’m trying really hard to distract myself from them but nothings helping and my only down time is when I’m asleep I was wondering has anyone had this how did you deal with it could you move forward from this challenging time</p></div>", "date": "16-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety/td-p/570325" }, { "author": "user-id/44313", "content": "<p>Hi CatherineF,</p><p> </p><p>It sounds like you're struggling with some intrusive thoughts, I used to struggle heaps with them too and the more I'd try to resist the worse they'd be. Sound familiar? </p><p> </p><p>Mental health education is a huge step towards feeling better as once you know what's going on, it's easier not to be so concerned about it. I recommend your own research on intrusive thoughts but I also have a video recommendation that I commented on another post. </p><p>A video on YouTube by the channel \"TherapyinaNutshell\" has this great exercise called \"Leaves on a Stream\". It helps you create distance between yourself and your thoughts and I think that barrier helped me heaps in overcoming them. She has other videos on intrusive thoughts too, I highly recommend.</p><p> </p><p>For years I thought it was just how I was, that I'd make myself so anxious all the time that I had this big orb of uncomfortable energy constantly at my chest that I couldn't shake no matter what I tried, in terms of trying to distract myself anyways. Researching what I was dealing with made me realize I'm not the only one suffering from this and it is extremely common. Realizing those thoughts you're having are in the past and have nothing to do with you now, creating that gap between your thoughts and yourself are crucial and you can definitely achieve that.</p><p> </p><p>Of course, if you feel like nothing you can do will help, visit your gp and have a chat.</p><p> </p><p>Hope the video helps and that this was informative. Feel better <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":red_heart:\">❤️</span></p></div>", "date": "16-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety/td-p/570325" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48260", "content": "<p>HI,</p><p> </p><p>Currently struggling through yet another period in life where I feel the challenges of study, work, family and life in general are beyond my capabilities to manage. </p><p> </p><p>I keep hating myself for having any ambition or dreams in the first place. I should know by now goals I set for myself are going to fail, but I keep putting myself in this situation.</p><p>In good times I feel like the world is my oyster and there is nothing that can stop me.</p><p> </p><p>I just want to quit what I cant manage. Maybe I can be more relaxed and start enjoying hobbies and life again. Unfortunately I feel chained to what I have already started and don't feel I have the grit to push through.</p><p> </p><p>My partner believes I have ADD/ADHD which affects my ability to focus on completing tasks, leading to anxiety and depression. She believes in me as someone that can achieve anything they put their mind to.</p><p>My past failures paint a different picture.</p><p> </p><p>I'm tired of this cycle. I cant break it. I just keep letting everyone including myself down.</p><p>I cant run away from challenges because of the financial and other impacts to those around me. I feel like a fraud.</p><p> </p><p>Can life just be reset? </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "16-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/lack-of-resilience-dealing-with-life-challenges/td-p/570309" }, { "author": "user-id/44313", "content": "<p>Hi Fionn,</p><p> </p><p>It sounds like you're feeling extremely overwhelmed right now; and that's okay. It doesn't make you a failure for feeling under pressure... life and it's pursuits are extremely stressful even for those without anxiety.</p><p> </p><p>You're exhibiting a lot of \"thinking traps\", things that ultimately worsen how you feel rather than benefit you at all. Challenging these thoughts is important and rationalizing them can be very helpful. You could try this with your partner or asking yourself:</p><p>The pros and cons of perseverance.</p><p>Worst case scenario.</p><p>If the worst case scenario were to occur, how would you deal with it?</p><p>How likely is it that this scenario will occur?</p><p> </p><p>Just to name a few. With anxiety, part of recovery is often going to have times where you feel like you've taken a step back, what's important here is to not let that cloud your achievements. I'm sure you've come so far, your ambitions and how you're going through the steps fo achieve them.</p><p> </p><p>It's called \"catastrophizing\" when you fixate on the worst possible outcome even when it's unlikely. This can also include your thoughts. For example, \"why did I even bother, I knew I'd fail\". You haven't failed yet, it's just hard at the moment but you're in the process of pushing through. \"Never\" \"I can't\" are qualifiers for this. A common thought challenge is to treat yourself like you would a best friend, you wouldn't say to a friend that they're right and they never had a chance, you'd uplift them, yet you're so hard on yourself.</p><p> </p><p>Lastly, breaking big problems into managing steps is important when a task seems too grand. Think about how you've managed until now, you've just taken the bits and pieces as they've come and you've strived. Try a different approach, instead of thinking this task is impossible, try thinking about what is possible now or even tomorrow, and if you do that enough it'll eventually go from a mountain to a boulder.</p><p> </p><p>Hope this has been of any help, feel better. You've got this!!! <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":red_heart:\">❤️</span></p></div>", "date": "16-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/lack-of-resilience-dealing-with-life-challenges/td-p/570309" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/20078", "content": "<p>I have a severe fear of almost everything and I wanted to have a baby for a long time but I can't get over the fear of carrying a baby and the whole process it terrifies me Has anyone here wanted a baby and was so afraid but went for it just looking for some advice not medication or anything please just how you coped with anxiety before during and after pregnancy?</p></div>", "date": "15-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/pregancy/td-p/570238" }, { "author": "user-id/43202", "content": "<p>Lisa1987<br>Thanks for sharing <em>your fears. <br>The first pregnancy is scary for most women . <br>i found the more I knew what was happening and what would happen the more I felt reassured. Knowledge is the key and support and love. </em></p></div>", "date": "15-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/pregancy/td-p/570238" }, { "author": "user-id/13121", "content": "<p>Hello Dear Lisa1987..</p><p> </p><p>Welcome to our forums,</p><p> </p><p>I agree with Quirky, I think that every women is a bit afraid of there first pregnancy…I know I was…that was 47 years ago…A lot of advancements have been made since then towards the safety and health of both mother and baby…</p><p> </p><p>Once I felt my unborn child move around in my belly…it felt so surreal that I was going to be a mum…the fear and anxiety of the unknown stayed with me but added to that was the excitement of meeting my baby…The love you feel when your baby is born..cannot be compared to anything else on this earth…</p><p> </p><p><br>I went on to have 2 more babies…still had that anxiety and fear…I think all pregnant women have some type of anxiety during pregnancy….and that’s okay sweet Lisa…Maybe reach out to your Dr..and talk your anxiety and fears out with them…and I’m sure that your Dr..will be with you every step in your journey with their care and support….towards motherhood…</p><p> </p><p>Thinking of you with kindness Dear Lisa…</p><p>Grandy</p></div>", "date": "15-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/pregancy/td-p/570238" }, { "author": "user-id/20078", "content": "<p>Thank-you so much for replying yes it's not really having the baby or anything it just the in between parts and getting to the step of insemination.</p><p> </p><p>It scares the hell out of me I'm sure when the time is right I'll take the leap of faith though </p></div>", "date": "15-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/pregancy/td-p/570238" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48177", "content": "<p>Hey my name is Mikaela . </p><p>I suffer depression and anxiety. I thort id join to build my courage up to fight the anixity</p></div>", "date": "10-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/introduce-my-self/td-p/569880" }, { "author": "user-id/16277", "content": "<p>Hi Makay,</p><p> </p><p>Warm welcome to the beyond blue forums. I hope you find these forums helpful and connect with some of the stories you read on here. It is great you have found the courage to find your anxiety. </p><p> </p><p>A great place to start if you're wanting to find out more about the supports available to you is to do the Beyond Blue mental health check in here: <a href=\"https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/mental-health-check-in-k10\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/mental-health-check-in-k10</a> </p><p> </p><p>Regarding anxiety in particular there are a few things, outside of professional help, that we can do for ourselves that can help manage symptoms. I personally use exercise and breathing exercises. But you can find a bunch of management strategies here: <a href=\"https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/anxiety/treatments-for-anxiety/anxiety-management-strategies\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/anxiety/treatments-for-anxiety/anxiety-management-strate...</a> </p><p> </p><p>And here are some relaxation exercises you can also do in your own time: <a href=\"https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/relaxation-exercises\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/relaxation-exercises</a> </p><p> </p><p>I hope some of these links are helpful. Please feel free to share more of your story here. Keep us posted on how you're going if you're looking for more advice/support. <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span></p><p> </p><p>Bob</p></div>", "date": "10-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/introduce-my-self/td-p/569880" }, { "author": "user-id/46728", "content": "<p>Welcome Mikaela - you have taken such a brave first step. I'm proud of you!</p></div>", "date": "13-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/introduce-my-self/td-p/569880" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48231", "content": "<p>Trying to cap my thoughts so they don’t spiral out of control. Why is it I always think of the worst possible outcome of a situation?</p></div>", "date": "13-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/controlling-your-thoughts/td-p/570113" }, { "author": "user-id/46728", "content": "<p>Hi there,</p><p> </p><p>I'm sorry you are going through this; worry and rumination like you are experiencing can be very hard. Here are a few suggestions that I have that may help:<br><br>- Practice mindfulness - the Calm App and Headspace have great meditations and mindful breathing etc - start with just a minute or two and build up. Beyond Blue also has some great guided visualisations that you can access for free.</p><p>- As a thought comes into your mind, sit with it. Imagine it is floating by on a cloud and say to yourself, \"I am having a thought that xyz\" and watch it float away. This creates separation from the thought. (Researching cognitive fusion/defusion may be a help)<br>- Above all, I highly recommend speaking with your GP and getting a referral to see a therapist. Psychologists have so many great tools to manage anxiety; it really is worth it.<br><br>I hope this can be of some help to you. Take care <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span></p></div>", "date": "13-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/controlling-your-thoughts/td-p/570113" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/25528", "content": "<p>Hey everyone,</p><p> </p><p>This is on my mind often and I wanted to see if anyone could relate or share advice.</p><p> </p><p>I have struggled with numerous mental and physical disorders throughout my childhood and teen years. Very much a neurodivergent person with anxiety! <br><br></p><p>What really frustrates me is that for most of my life me, or my parents originally, pretty much had to figure out all my unique issues without the support of medical or mental health professionals. My parents were literally dismissed when asking if I was autistic as a child - I was diagnosed several years later. The same happened when I got chronically ill as a teen.</p><p> </p><p>I also struggled with food intolerances, anxiety and chronic illnesses through my teen years that we treated through a really good diet. It is such an alternative approach and most people don’t believe that diets play a big role in how you feel but it was absolutely the case in my experience. Literally was the difference between me functioning and being bedridden. We had to use these rigid restrictive diets to manage my issues as no one could recognise the disorders I have, let alone address them.</p><p> </p><p>I have a couple of people now who can help but I still don’t feel like I can rely on most medical professionals. They just don’t know how to help most of my issues unfortunately and it gets really tiring. Makes you feel invisible and that you have to carry it all.</p></div>", "date": "12-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/always-having-to-treat-or-cure-myself/td-p/570036" }, { "author": "user-id/19707", "content": "<p>Hi welcome,</p><p> </p><p>An interesting discussion. There is many things that the professionals miss, are not good at or even misdiagnose (I was so from ADHD to bipolar). So this I put down to medical staff-  1. Human error 2. lack of experience 3. incompetence.  </p><p> </p><p>Not much different to other professions really, In the 70's as a taxi driver in Melbourne the only way to learn was to actually travel along those roads/highways to recall where they were. Customers expected you to know where to go. So learning by medical professionals must be hard as one day they need to treat patients on their own. My GP is young and studies up on a problem I present to him if he doesnt know much about it then rings me with a more complete conclusion. We cant always rely of older or more experienced GP's.</p><p> </p><p>Let's say a Dr asks a depressed patient - \"do you get enough sleep\". Patient thinks sleep isnt an issue so the topic goes away. However an experienced GP might know that good sleep is essential for mental illness patients so order a sleep study only to find the patient has sleep apnoea and therefore needs a CPAP machine which improved the patients mood. </p><p> </p><p>The other problem is the grey area of illnesses. Some people go their whole life not being diagnosed with an illness. This could be due to the illness not being prominent (borderline) or denial or other reasons. </p><p> </p><p>So I'm sympathetic towards doctors for the above reasons and yes it means we often dont get the treatment we deserve, but IMO it is part of life, the imperfection of the medical professions is normal because they are humans, they make mistakes, they cant learn everything from a university and they cant be accompanied by a senior doctor forever. </p><p> </p><p>So thats the reasons autism was dismissed when you were a child and that in your case diet was more important than doctors took seriously. What is the remedy to this? It is getting a second opinion and a third if you think you need it. That is an action you can take and is a wise move.</p><p> </p><p>TonyWK</p></div>", "date": "13-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/always-having-to-treat-or-cure-myself/td-p/570036" }, { "author": "user-id/46728", "content": "<p>Hi,<br><br>Firstly, holistic treatment can be a great complementary treatment or option when conventional treatments aren't working (obviously, this isn't the case for everyone, I'm speaking in general terms). So kudos to your parents; it sounds like they were ahead of their time.</p><p>Have you spoken to a professional about your anxiety? It sounds like you have been through a lot growing up with your health, so it isn't surprising that you don't trust medical professionals. Perhaps seeing a therapist to unpack your anxieties will help.<br><br>Advocating for yourself is also so important. If you don't think you are being heard, there is nothing wrong with ending the relationship with that particular professional. You need to have a good relationship with them to form the bonds you need for adequate treatment. Trust yourself, go with your gut; if they are not the right person for you, then back yourself. You might find voicing your concerns may make them listen to you.<br><br>I hope you find the support you need; all the best.</p></div>", "date": "13-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/always-having-to-treat-or-cure-myself/td-p/570036" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/21715", "content": "<p>I know there are a lot of nervous flyers out there. I would consider myself one, though I am not to the extent of not being able to board a plane and cannot sleep nights before a flight etc. I have been flying since the age of one, and basically I have been on some 100 flights from as short as 1 hour to 12 hours. People would think I am very used to flying and comfortable with it. Well, to some extent it is, but indeed I am not too comfortable with take off and turbulence. I can deal with take offs pretty well: a headphone and closed eyes for 2 minutes when the plane leaves the ground. Once the plane is in air, I am completely okay. I often book a window seat so I can look at the view of the city from the plane. The great view out of the window and in-flight entertainment often make me forget about any fears. I would be relaxed for the rest of the flight unless the seat belt sign comes on / the plane gets bumpy. I can endure some bumpiness, but I start to fear when the turbulence is like rapidly ascending and descending for 10 floors. I know in real life the plane is not going to drop that much and turbulence is rarely dangerous (from my aviation friends), but I can't help being scared! I was flying back from England once and encountered some pretty bad turbulence, like the whole plane was in a washing machine for 2 minutes! My mum was with me that time, so I held her hands very tightly until it was over. My mum was surprised that I got that scared because I have been flying a lot of long haul flights on my own (at least two each year). What she does not know is - I did not encounter that sort of turbulence in those flights! For some reason the passengers around me appeared very calm in the middle of a bad turbulence. They were watching movies as if nothing was happening. I wanted to scream but I worried about making a fool of myself. I wonder if I was overreacted. Does anyone feel the same with turbulence? </p>\n<p>My psychologist is aware of my fear, and she reassures me that my fear is perfectly normal because this does not stop me from flying. My desire for holiday always overcomes any fears of flying, but I wish to feel more comfortable with turbulence as this is unavoidable. She suggests that I do some breathing exercises when the turbulence comes. Do you have any other tips? Thanks. </p></div>", "date": "07-10-2017", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/mild-fear-of-flying/td-p/307838" }, { "author": "user-id/32332", "content": "<p>Dear Hope.for.the.best~</p>\n<p>I too really dislike flying, as do umpteen other people. I guess for me part of it is not being in control and not knowing what is going on.</p>\n<p>As for tips, well I can tell you what I do, which is read. I grimly hang on to a favorite novel and read my way thought the flight, particularly takeoff and landing. Distraction is the only thing that works at all. No amount of logic or reassurance all is normal and safe does anything I'm afraid.</p>\n<p>One other thing, try gripping a wrist rather than a hand, otherwise you may crush someone's fingers.</p>\n<p>Croix</p>\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "08-10-2017", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/mild-fear-of-flying/td-p/307838" }, { "author": "user-id/21715", "content": "<p>Thanks Croix. I also find the feeling of \"not in control\" uncomfortable. Thanks to my aviation and pilot friends, I have known a great deal about flying and it has certainly helped. I flew a lot with my family when I was young but I could not remember any bad cases of turbulence (there must be). My flying experience was quite positive back then. I found the airplane's seat belt very interesting as a kid! Part of my fear may come from travelling alone, as I mostly fly by myself these days. I really admire my friends who are big fans of roller coaster. They are the ones who enjoy turbulence. </p>\n<p>Thanks for your kind advice on gripping. Of course, I will never grip any strangers on a plane no matter what! </p></div>", "date": "11-10-2017", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/mild-fear-of-flying/td-p/307838" }, { "author": "user-id/48181", "content": "<p>Dear hope for the best,</p><p><br>I’m so glad I found your post! I’m currently at home in tears as I fly out for NZ in two days time and I’m like this every single time I fly due to my fear of flying. I mostly travel for sporting events but this time it’s for a mates wedding. Nearly every time I leave booking flights until the last moment and book with the best of intentions but as the flight(s) get closer I find myself worrying, unable to sleep at night. I even contemplate postponing the flights so I can sleep easier and not have the worry</p><p>of knowing I have to fly.</p><p> </p><p><br>Like yourself the turbulence gets me but also occasionally the speed up to take-off also gets me which can have me gripping the seat for dear life until the plane is off the ground and I feel stable in my seat.</p><p> </p><p>Sometimes I have to force myself onto the plane and just put up with the few minutes leading up to and during take-off.</p><p> </p><p>I can’t thank you enough for sharing your fear cause I’m a nearly 40 year old person who hates that someone my age has this terrible fear which causes them to break down in tears, feel anxious, not function properly in the weeks and days before hand. Hopefully you read this before I fly as some encouragement would be much needed. I hope you’re managing your fear.</p><p> </p><p>docker_mad_dave</p></div>", "date": "10-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/mild-fear-of-flying/td-p/307838" }, { "author": "user-id/32332", "content": "<p>Dear Docker_mad_dave~</p><p>I'm glad you came here and found that others too suffer from the same fear. Actually if you looked at all the passengers in a plane taking off or landing you might notice a fair proportion are showing signs of stress. It is very common. I look at them to distract myself.</p><p> </p><p>Actually you sound a pretty brave person. Faced wiht almost overwhelming fear you carry on and fly anyway. That takes a lot of courage.</p><p> </p><p>You will already have read my means of coping. The only other thing I'd suggest is if you practice a breathing exercise if things get too much: 4 beats in, 4 on hold, 4 exhale, and 4 wait. Do not try too hard but make it almost like natural breathing. This can be done unobtrusively in your seat and does tend to leave one calmer.</p><p> </p><p>On the days before I'd suggest practicing wiht the free smartphone app <a href=\"https://www.smilingmind.com.au/smiling-mind-app/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener nofollow noreferrer\">Smiling Mind</a>. It does take practice, but has exercises to suit everyone, even me who has the attention span of a goldfish.</p><p> </p><p>With practice it can break the cycle of unwanted thoughts and fears leaving one much calmer.</p><p> </p><p>If you felt like letting us know how you get on that would be great</p><p> </p><p>Croix</p></div>", "date": "11-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/mild-fear-of-flying/td-p/307838" }, { "author": "user-id/37105", "content": "<p>Hello <span>Docker_mad_dave and thankyou for being a part of Beyond Blue too!</span></p><p> </p><p><span>You are strong by flying in the first place. I envy your resilience...I wish I had the strength you possess. As you know everyone has varying levels of anxiety. </span></p><p><span>Just for myself I have no desire to fly on a Boeing 737 or the now redundant 747-400 Jumbo. After many years of generalized anxiety/PTSD. </span></p><p><span>Croix mentioned the standard breathing technique which sometimes can be helpful for people that are 'nervous' flyers.</span></p><p> </p><p><span>You are strong <u><strong> Docker_mad_dave</strong></u>. I wish I had even a small amount of your strength. I wish I was 'nearly 40' again! I am 20 years older....Doh!</span></p><p> </p><p><span>I really hope you can (<em>only if you wish</em>) stick around the forums. You speak from the heart...and that is another strength you possess</span></p><p> </p><p>my kindest always</p><p> </p><p>Paul</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "13-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/mild-fear-of-flying/td-p/307838" }, { "author": "user-id/48101", "content": "<p>hello! </p><p> </p><p>thank you for sharing. its completely normal to fear flying as i experience similar things as you. one thing that has helped me in managing my fear during turbulence is to remind myself that there is pressure coming from above and below which will prevent the plane from falling. i have also used techniques like the 5-4-3-2-1 technique (5 things you can see, 4 you can touch, 3 you can hear, 2 you can smell, and 1 you can taste) to lower my flying anxiety and calm myself down when i feel that my fear is rushing through my body. </p><p> </p><p>i hope this helps!</p></div>", "date": "13-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/mild-fear-of-flying/td-p/307838" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/43493", "content": "<p>I’m going through social anxiety disorder since childhood. I’m 38 now. I stay in the house 24/7.</p><p>I cannot go out anywhere, buy anything, I cannot drive, I cannot talk to my neighbors, I cannot speak on the phone because of my social anxiety. I was guilty for not having a job. I was harsh on myself for feeling and behaving weird. I always had negative things to say about myself. I never loved me. I never even looked at me in the mirror. I hated me. I was ashamed of me. I blamed myself for having social anxiety.</p><p>3 yrs back I took a decision that I wanted to change my life.</p><p>I started searching for videos on YouTube that could help me. I follow Aaron Doughty, Mel Robbins, Julien Himself, Dr. Julie, Teal Swan, Clark Kegley, Jay Shetty and Brian Scott. I decided to become a better version of myself every day I wake up.</p><p>It took me 2 years to completely forgive my parents. It wasn’t easy, remembering and acknowledging the mental abuse. It was hard, almost impossible. I just didn’t want to go there, but I had decided to heal myself. I had to explain to myself that it wasn’t my fault. It was their behavior. It was about them. Maybe it’s what their parents did to them, but I have proudly decided I will not be the same to my children or my husband. It’s from me that the chord will be cut!</p><p>I am learning about myself. I am discovering myself. I have started owning my social anxiety. Throughout the day I tell myself, you got this, I am proud of you, you are so confident around people, the best people come to you, I am rooting for you! Nobody will love you more than me!</p><p>I make sure I don’t be harsh on myself anymore; I make sure I don’t talk negative about myself. When something goes wrong, my mind immediately start to think bad about myself but I quickly turn it around and talk positive. I have started respecting myself. I look in the mirror and tell myself what you’re going through is not your fault.</p><p>I could not leave the bed before, now I wake up, have my tea and kneel down and pray to the universe for all the people who are suffering mentally and physically, that’s the least I can do.</p><p>I have a pen and a notebook now; I’m making plans as to how to get out of the house and all. I am fighting my fears. Not easy. But I have decided that I want to enjoy my life. Let’s see what happens.</p><p>I thought of sharing, thank you. </p></div>", "date": "27-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-have-decided-to-take-little-steps-to-change-my-life/td-p/571112" }, { "author": "user-id/13121", "content": "<p>Dear Madale,</p><p> </p><p>Thank you so much for a very inspiring post…your have come a long way since you first joined the forums…Well done..</p><p> </p><p>Learning to care for ourselves is a major step forward in our journey in helping us accept our mental health and to begin our healing… <br><br></p><p>I’m certain your post will inspire a lot of people here on the forums…to try to be more gentle and caring towards themselves…</p><p> </p><p>My kind thoughts Dear Madale…</p><p>Grandy..</p><p> </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "27-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-have-decided-to-take-little-steps-to-change-my-life/td-p/571112" }, { "author": "user-id/43493", "content": "<p>Thank you for your support, gives me courage. </p></div>", "date": "27-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-have-decided-to-take-little-steps-to-change-my-life/td-p/571112" }, { "author": "user-id/43493", "content": "<p>I think anxiety has to be there. It's a feeling that has to be in us because we are human beings, just like sadness, happiness, anger. And we are designed to work with our different feelings in our lives. But I think when we can't handle or deal with the anxiety as in when it takes over us then it becomes a disorder. Let's try to train our brain, let's try to train our minds by changing the old thought patterns and same old beliefs like reprogramming the mind into new thoughts, thoughts that will help us overcome anxiety. </p><p> </p><p><a href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zTuX_ShUrw0\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zTuX_ShUrw0</a></p></div>", "date": "28-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-have-decided-to-take-little-steps-to-change-my-life/td-p/571112" }, { "author": "user-id/35928", "content": "<p>Oh Madel I hear you loud and clear. Shout it from the rooftops in your heart \" I am getting out of this house, I am going to enjoy my life, nothing will hold me back\"</p><p> </p><p>And good on you. Go girl go.</p><p> </p><p>I too have had symptoms of social anxiety. Couldn't get out of bed, couldn't walk out of the house in fear that the neighbours would see me . Had fear they I would have to talk to them. Had fear that they would even see me. I use to only get the mail if there was any at night. I worked all through that and only occasionally get stuck there. But hardly ever. I had challenges going walking through a shopping centre as I felt like everyone was looking at me. I felt so awkward and self conscious. I use to go there pretend to stare on something on my phone. Which was a stepping stone. I don't do that anymore.</p><p> </p><p>I find it a challenge to talk on phones actually. But I am improving the more I do it. I don't like looking into mirrors much at all. </p><p> </p><p>And I am improving verbally speaking out loud to others. Little by little.</p><p> </p><p>Anyway I am so proud of you even though I hardly know you. Grap life and keep going. I felt your determination.</p><p> </p><p>I am going to look up those people you mentioned, maybe I can learn some things from them.</p><p> </p><p>Go girl go</p><p> </p><p>Shell xx</p></div>", "date": "28-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/i-have-decided-to-take-little-steps-to-change-my-life/td-p/571112" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48385", "content": "Hi,I'm on my second attempt to withdraw from an antipsychotic,took it slowly this time.Last time my anxiety all came back and I had to go back on it.Anyone have any luck getting off this?I've been on it for two years and put on weight.It makes me sleep too long and I feel like a zombie.You get terrible insomnia coming off this as well.Jyst would like to chat to anyone that has any ideas on how to successfully withdraw from an antipsychotic.Thanks</div>", "date": "26-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anti-psychotics/td-p/571071" }, { "author": "user-id/19707", "content": "<p>Hi Roseanne</p><p> </p><p>We cant advise on medication the same as we cant diagnose. What I can say is the obvious sometimes eludes us.</p><p> </p><p>When I had a carer nurse make an assessment she had recommended halving my dose and brought in my GP to confirm that which he did. That did the trick. However obviously again your GP/professional has to be consulted about any change.</p><p> </p><p>It is not good just surviving on the wrong medication or dosage not ideal, life can be such a drag and I'm proof that pursuing this is well worth the inconvenience.</p><p> </p><p>I hope you are ok</p><p> </p><p>TonyWK</p></div>", "date": "26-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anti-psychotics/td-p/571071" }, { "author": "user-id/13121", "content": "<p>Hello Dear Rosanne123,</p><p> </p><p>A very warm and caring welcome to the forums..</p><p> </p><p>I’m sorry you’re snuggling to get of your antipsychotic meds…I am on them and have put on a lot of weight….but, sleep so much better then before I started them…(3) years now….for me they work, but they don’t work for everyone….Even though they have put weight on me…just the way I feel for me, I can live with the extra weight because of the way the antipsychotic’s are helping me with my mental health….</p><p> </p><p>I agree very much with our wonderful TonyWK, that reaching out to your Dr. and following his instructions fully is about the only way to get off them….plus also it’s a very safe way to do it…</p><p> </p><p>My kind thoughts Dear Rosanne..</p><p>Grandy..</p></div>", "date": "26-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anti-psychotics/td-p/571071" }, { "author": "user-id/48385", "content": "<p>Thank you,I nearly felt normal today,just headaches and nausea and some anxiety on waking.I just wake every morning not knowing how I am going to feel.Hoping each day gets better.Thanks for the advice</p></div>", "date": "27-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anti-psychotics/td-p/571071" }, { "author": "user-id/48385", "content": "<p>Thanks so much for your advice</p></div>", "date": "27-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anti-psychotics/td-p/571071" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48389", "content": "<ol><li>Not sure where to start, I’m usually the one giving advice and comfort. I am an empath, I feel incredibly deeply and usually know how to deal. Though I’ve been experiencing rather painful emotions brought on by my own emotional pain which is caused by anxieties and insecurities. Not so much physical insecurities but more so deeper insecurities such as (not feeling worthy, not good enough, a thorn in my partners side) all that jazz. Let’s say some relationship anxiety. Though this has caused me to go into a downward spiral of unhappiness, and I am a very bubbly person. My significant other is most of the time in defence mode so every time I bring up my feelings or emotional needs he gets defensive and says I’m being insecure and needy. It’s causing a lot of heartache… a lot! I feel like it’s all my doing that he gets defensive, I’m no saint, I think sometimes I make it hard on him by sounding like a broken record. Anyway I needed to get this out and off of my chest. <br><br></li></ol></div>", "date": "26-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relationship-anxiety/td-p/571092" }, { "author": "user-id/19707", "content": "<p>Hi, welcome</p><p> </p><p>Empaths are complex, we arent just in help mode for other people but a vast array of feelings and as these feelings basically run our lives we cant help but feel non empaths lack feeling hence it leads to expectations. We can identify our feelings are extreme and acknowledge non empaths are more \"normal\" but that doesnt mean we dont feel a giant trench between us and them.</p><p> </p><p>When it comes to expectations, therefore, we try to not have them but our \"constantly wagging tail\" reminds us that others tails only twitch. Our differences are too different to bare leading to us criticising our partners and friends in a kind of silent yelling \"I need you, I want deep and meaningful discussion but if you turn your head or take it wrongly all the time then... what is the good of you to me\".</p><p> </p><p>Add to that in your case (and common) is the childhood environment/parental deficiencies that led to us feeling insecure. Sometimes as adult we can get therapy, meds for associated illnesses and if we talk to others forever it wouldnt all be enough. A bottomless well of need.</p><p> </p><p>In terms of our partners we have options-</p><p> </p><ul><li>Seek out group therapy or forums to talk about our issues and leave our partner alone in terms of filling that hole.</li><li>Break the defence walls of our partner by different approaches. Eg Telling your partner gently that you have needs of conversation that leads to things like reassurance and that he can opt out of caring for you at that level (although quietly you accept that this will distant you from him). If he agrees to talk with you about topics then ask him not to fly into defence mode. Also \"darling can we talk about a problem not involving you\"? Then ease into the conversation BUT a big absence can be you not asking questions which leads to him feeling he is just a ear to you not the solution. \"I'm feeling I need more affection at the moment as I'm thinking a lot about my childhood, what do you think\"?</li><li>Move on and seek a more ideal listener</li><li>Fix our insecurities by repairing the scars long since inflicted.</li></ul><p>Some people need their partner as a sounding board for our emotional well being. This can be taxing, is it really their role to hear us out all the time? Well, not really but showing care and understanding with some affection and we usually feel great. Such absences of those qualities often doesnt cut the mustard with empaths.</p><p> </p><p>In a 90/10 person (90% empath 10% normal) having a partner 10/90 is a miss mash. My first 3 long term relationships were all- less than 10% empathy on their part, my now marriage of 12 years is 90/90 and its wonderful. </p><p> </p><p>Whatever your future being an empath is unique, something to be proud of and can be channelled into some meaningful past times.. like I am doing here. So embrace it, you are special because of it.</p><p> </p><p>I hope that helps. </p><p> </p><p>TonyWK</p></div>", "date": "27-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/relationship-anxiety/td-p/571092" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/30019", "content": "<p>Hi</p><p> </p><p>I've recently had my period or curse as I call it.</p><p>With work, as much as I try not too,I just seem to keep on saying wrong thing or doing wrong ady at work had allergy with the wipes though she's not been affected since we've had them, to cut a long story short she asked me to find some hyperallergenic ones, but not to buy them, I do wonder at the logic of asking me to find some but not to buy any, why ask to search or why didn't she just find it herself.</p><p>Anyway, she has been stressed out, but need to be kind, but as my Mum says, she chose to do a Team Leader job &amp; that job has stresses &amp; problems, but you do get paid a decent amount to deal with the stresses &amp; problems.</p><p>Sometimes I think she's tired with working &amp; needs to retire, not that I want her to go, it's just work seems to be too much for her &amp; I'm making her grumpy by being me. I just at times, I just do the wrong thing, I can't always make her happy, sometimes I do, bur I just stuff up, She's 63. I need to be more kinder, as it is tiring for people in their 60s, but I'm wise enough not to tell her she needs to retire, she needs to realize this herself (I don't know how long it's going to take her to realize she's getting tired) but if I do. My horrible thought that I had today, was I just want her to retire! To be able to live her life &amp; have life &amp; not be stuck at work! But to all you oldies out there, please keep on working till your 100 if you want!!! As long as your happy, keep on working! Sorry if your offended, I just feel sorry for people who look and act like the work is too much.</p><p>How can I be better or be better at communicating, I'm just s*** at it, I always say wrong thing. I get complimented but I don't beliec3 it as sooner or later I'm going to f*** up &amp; get told off </p></div>", "date": "18-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/hi/td-p/570567" }, { "author": "user-id/16277", "content": "<p>Hi JacintaMarie,</p><p> </p><p>No need to apologise. This is a safe and non-judgmental space. It is also not necessarily a bad thought to want your boss to retire. I've definitely thought that many times throughout my life haha. </p><p> </p><p>Communication at work can be hard, especially if you have pre-existing issues like anxiety. I find myself ruminating on things I've said hours or sometimes days ago. It can be difficult but if you can learn to manage the anxiety and intrusive thoughts your life at work and communication will be much easier. I find talking about my thoughts or clarifying things with objective third parties very helpful. </p><p> </p><p>Regardless, the approach I take to communicating with others is that \"less is more\". Although I'm a bit of an extrovert I tend to keep quiet in social situations just because I like to keep my thoughts to myself a lot of the time. I also prefer listening to talking. Simply by listening to others you can get a sense of what style of communication works best for them and how to go about saying things. You also get a sense of what style of humour the other person has and what is acceptable/not. </p><p> </p><p>However for your boss it seems like you're doing great in that you're considerate of her limits and can understand her perspective. Keep this mentality when speaking with her and I doubt you'll say anything wrong or out of left field. </p><p> </p><p>Hope that helps.</p><p> </p><p>Bob</p></div>", "date": "19-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/hi/td-p/570567" }, { "author": "user-id/30019", "content": "<p>Hi Bob</p><p>Thanks for that, I'll try to remember it, where I work too is what I call stress city, we have alot of people who are still learning, and management is still learning alot, I'm trying to \"walkaway\"</p><p>But I feel abit better, knowing that it's not bad to hope someone retires, I think it might be her personality, she's </p><p>A </p><p>Stress head, though sometimes I wonder why Stress heads go for team leader jobs, that's Stress city, in terms of jobs</p></div>", "date": "24-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/hi/td-p/570567" }, { "author": "user-id/16277", "content": "<p>Hi JacintaMarie,</p><p> </p><p>Thanks for the update. That's good that you recognise your thoughts aren't anything to feel bad over. Sometimes people with anxious traits will feel inappropriate guilt which is quite common. It's important to acknowledge this as well. Yes, being a team leader is stressful but so is being under a stressful team leader. So remember to be kind to yourself too. </p><p> </p><p>Bob</p></div>", "date": "26-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/hi/td-p/570567" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48296", "content": "<p>Hi everyone,</p><p>I’ve been living with Anxiety for years now. I haven’t officially been diagnosed but I know that I have it. I’ve noticed now that I have experienced Anxiety at its worst three seperate times in my life. Once when I was still in highschool, again during my first relationship in 2020, and now, three years later. <br><br></p><p>I know what works for me and how to overcome my anxiety, intrusive thoughts and stress, but what I am currently struggling with is struggling to understand that they are just thoughts and know that i will overcome it. </p><p> </p><p>There are multiple factors to my current feelings of anxiety. I have experienced burn out after completing two internships in rapid succession, one which was overseas, both in which were undertaken during my studies at university. I only had a week’s rest during this period of returning home to Australia, and starting University again for the new semester.</p><p> </p><p>I realised burnout was approaching, as I stopped feeling love and passion for my course, constantly doubted my abilities, and believed I wasn’t worth being in the course I am in today. This caused me to delay my course and take a 6 month break, but i still needed to finish off my first semester this year. During study this year, I started a new part time job which was 60 minutes away from my house. The only way for me to get to work was through public transportation, taking a bus and train. I worked four days a week 9-5, would have to wake up at 6am to arrive on time, and would return home at 6:30 pm. During this time, I also studied for two days a week, leaving my with only one day off a week. Doing this was extremely unsustainable to my mental health, and caused me to overload myself further i top of the burnout i had already developed.</p><p> </p><p>I was coping at first, but one day at work I had an anxious thought, and no matter what i did i couldn’t get it out of my head since I hadn’t experienced bad anxiety since 2020. Ever since then, i have been unable to get on top of my anxiety, and it has gotten to the point where I can’t even focus anymore. My head feels constantly clouded and it’s affecting me, and my relationships. I ended up resigning from the job, I haven’t drunk in three weeks and now I have started going back to the gym and exercising. <br><br></p><p>I believe and know that i will get back on top of my anxiety again, but it’s so exhausting and stressful right now. i just want to think clearly again and get rid of my intrusive thoughts, but knowing that it will take a while to achieve this is making it harder for me too. </p><p> </p><p>If anyone has any suggestions, please let me know. I’m also sorry for rambling too. Thank you</p></div>", "date": "18-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-anxiety/td-p/570559" }, { "author": "user-id/16277", "content": "<p>Hi pikachu22,</p><p> </p><p>No need to apologise and you're not rambling at all. I think it is great that you recognise your burnout and have an understanding of your anxiety and how you're coping with it. Similar to you I suffer from anxious thoughts (they're usually silly things like whether I've said the right thing during an interaction) but I struggle to shake these thoughts even if I  know they are irrational. They also get worse when I am stressed or run down. I'm currently working full time and studying part time so am probably at my limit at the moment as well but I trying to push myself as I only have a few months left of my diploma. </p><p> </p><p>It is definitely difficult to juggle everything as a full time student. It is good that you have taken a break and that you have pulled back on work. Exercise is great but don't go overboard or get over committed. I've definitely pulled back on the gym and am only going 2-3 days a week max at the moment. Other things I find to help with anxiety is to debrief with my friends or manager as well as trying to keep a routine for my week. It doesn't have to be a strict timetable but knowing that I have set times for work, study, play, therapy is helpful. I also find it helpful going to the library to study as I am less distracted and more productive than when at home. Here are some other good anxiety management tools: <a href=\"https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/anxiety/treatments-for-anxiety/anxiety-management-strategies\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/anxiety/treatments-for-anxiety/anxiety-management-strate...</a> </p><p> </p><p>As you recognised it is a bit of a journey and a constant battle. But having the right tools can make life so much easier. And getting those tools doesn't have to be a long process either. </p><p> </p><p>I hope my post is helpful and sorry if I have rambled also. Please keep us updated and feel free to contact the counsellors here at BB if you need to talk to someone over the phone or through web chat: <a href=\"https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/talk-to-a-counsellor\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/talk-to-a-counsellor</a> </p><p> </p><p>Bob</p></div>", "date": "19-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-anxiety/td-p/570559" }, { "author": "user-id/48312", "content": "<p>Hi Pikachu,</p><p> </p><p>It can be tough - what has always helped me is to know it will not be forever. <br><br></p><p>The best advice I received was that when you have anxiety, it is your body telling you something…finding out what that is can be the hard part…it can also be the most rewarding. <br><br></p><p>I have listened to a lot of “your world within” podcasts also…this helped me a lot when at my worst and when it at times felt like nothing would help. <br><br></p><p>Keep up the exercise - cold showers/baths can be a good reboot also.</p><p> </p><p>Never forget and never doubt that you are in control.  Ignore the lizard-brain of doubt and believe, know and take action that you will get through this.</p><p> </p><p>If you’re anything like me, the self-belief won’t happen overnight - nothing worthwhile ever does…but keep at it and you will succeed.</p><p> </p><p>Everything you need to get through this, you already have…</p></div>", "date": "19-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-anxiety/td-p/570559" }, { "author": "user-id/48296", "content": "<p>Hey there,</p><p> </p><p>Thank you for replying and showing support. Last night I started journaling and writing down how I feel. I also made a music playlist that has made me feel a little better too. Today I went on a nice walk and felt great the whole way. However I had this one thought that made my anxiety bad in the past, that just spiralled out of control (as anxiety always does) and it ruined my night. I went on a call with my friends but my anxiety has prevented me from relaxing. It also gets bad whenever I get triggered and my anxiety continues.</p><p><br>Tomorrow I am getting a haircut and have a job interview so I am optimistic and happy for change in my life. I have been unemployed for three weeks now, and this week has been the worst this far. It’s getting to the point where I avoid gaming and doing stuff I enjoy, as well as limiting what I eat because I’m trying to get back into the gym. </p><p> </p><p>I did see progress today at least, so I know it’s working. I just want it to work faster. But no matter what I am worried that my anxiety won’t change. I have considered going to therapy if my anxiety doesn’t get better in two weeks. Until then i’m going to keep trying remedies that have worked for me in the past, such as drinking tea, using lavender pillow spray, exercising, and thinking positively. Meditation has helped a lot too.</p><p> </p><p>I will keep you all updated</p></div>", "date": "19-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-anxiety/td-p/570559" }, { "author": "user-id/48296", "content": "<p>Thank you for your reply and your suggestions. I know that I am in control no matter what, and I will stick to that. Do you know a phrase that helps you when you are anxious at all that you can repeat and feel better afterwards?</p><p> </p><p>Thank you again. I’ll keep you updated</p></div>", "date": "19-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-anxiety/td-p/570559" }, { "author": "user-id/48312", "content": "<p><br>What I have said to myself is “I am in control!”.</p><p><br>And I have pushed myself to not care if/who sees, hears me say it…I have used it when trying to run out the pain when my brain is telling me to give in, to go sit in icy cold lakes in the northern US. <br><br></p><p>It sounds and feels weird to say it out loud (well, it did to me), but I needed to cast of the shackles of fear that got to the point of crippling; fear of consequence of things that will never happen…</p><p> </p><p>I still battle with that every day…but I refuse to let fear control me. Consider the challenge of doing one thing a day that scares you…every time you do, you make yourself that little bit stronger…</p><p> </p><p>Other favourites of mine:</p><p>1.  You are always stronger than you think you are. </p><p>2. Almost everything you are afraid of will either never happen or is reversible.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "19-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-anxiety/td-p/570559" }, { "author": "user-id/48312", "content": "<p>Don’t ever be shy to go see a doctor also…medication can help (my opinion is that it is a tool - it can help, but it won’t fix the underlying cause). That’s where the exercise, healthy diet, meditation all help - enjoy the journey of finding exactly what makes you happy, what helps during the challenges. </p><p> </p><p>It may be a long journey - it doesn’t mean it will always be difficult…learning from your anxiety will give you a perspective and resilience that most will never have the potential to experience.<br><br>I have no regrets about experiencing anxiety; in my experience, if you face it with honesty - real, genuine honesty with yourself - you may find this experience frees you from something that held you back your whole life…</p></div>", "date": "19-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-anxiety/td-p/570559" }, { "author": "user-id/16277", "content": "<p>Hi pikachu22,</p><p> </p><p>Thanks for the update. Journalling is a great idea and I'm glad you are feeling better. I am glad you are taking positive steps such as exercise, talking to your friends and considering therapy. Please keep us updated. I hope your job interview went well also. Yes unfortunately we all wish recovery was a quicker journey but no matter at what point you are in the journey you should give yourself praise. A quote I really like is:</p><p> </p><p>\"she stood in the storm and the wind did not blow her way, she adjusted her sails\"</p><p> </p><p>Bob</p></div>", "date": "26-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/dealing-with-anxiety/td-p/570559" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48362", "content": "<p>Hi everyone,</p><p>This is my first time posting in this forum. <br>There’s a few things I’m struggling with at the moment but one that’s constant in my life is a problem with getting motivated and knowing what I want. <br>I’ve tried so many things; creative and languages, etc but nothing has really stuck. Mainly because most things involve being around other people which I’m not comfortable with. I can go to parties with my partner and feel confident but when it comes to doing something like swimming or ceramics I really need to force myself every time. My Psychologist says that it takes time and practice but even after multiple times I still dread going. <br>Does anyone feel like this and how do you deal with it?</p><p>I now feel like I don’t want to do anything and if I can’t motivate or inspire myself to do anything how can I entice friends or my partner to do things together?</p></div>", "date": "24-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/motivation-and-anxiety/td-p/570904" }, { "author": "user-id/48370", "content": "<p>Hi, </p><p>Staying motivated I think is one of the hardest things to do. When I was at uni, I think I procrastinated way too much. In the end I would have alarms in my phone and work for 30mins and break for 10mins. I found that having shorter times that I had to concentrate really helped. <br>Social anxiety sucks, I’ve watched my son struggle so much, but he is now making himself go to events and even overseas because he doesn’t want to look back at life and say “well I didn’t do anything with my life”. I’m so proud he is working on what he wants to do and where he wants to go.<br>I really hope you can find that bit of happiness for yourself. <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":grinning_face:\">😀</span></p></div>", "date": "25-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/motivation-and-anxiety/td-p/570904" }, { "author": "user-id/38654", "content": "<p>Hi there,</p><p> </p><p>Thank you for sharing. First off, you should be so proud of yourself for going and doing these things to try and help your anxiety - that is really awesome!</p><p> </p><p>It does take time, as your psychologist said, and doing the things that we dread often helps us with our anxiety. Stepping out of your comfort zone is just that - uncomfortable, but that is where the most growth happens. </p><p> </p><p>It is hard to stay motivated, but what helps me is focussing on the end goal. I study because I will eventually have a successful career, and then I won't need to study as intensely anymore. It then feels rewarding, if i think of it in that way. You are working towards something, and it is hard to stay motivated in the moment, but try to focus on the bigger picture - maybe set some long-term goals for yourself.</p><p> </p><p>I hope this helps,</p><p>Jaz xx</p><p> </p></div>", "date": "26-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/motivation-and-anxiety/td-p/570904" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48086", "content": "<p>Recently at work I’ve had some anxiety around my hours, as it worries me that I won’t make ends meet each week. Recently ours hours dropped and my boss did communicate this to us and it always happens around the start of the financial year. They’ve recently picked up slightly but still not great and my boss hasn’t been doing our rosters because they’ve been away. So another person is and they are particularly bias so while one person who does the same job as me is getting 25-30 hours per week I’m getting 10-15 and then I have to wait to be called in. This just doesn’t feel fair to me because I’m given more tasks than they are or they leave the jobs for me to do when I come in. I’ve communicated some of this to my boss but wanted to avoid names so it didn’t come across as targeting and that I don’t trust her opinion. It just gave me so much anxiety about working with those people and that I had been doing something wrong when I hadn’t been, that I want to cry. I get called in and shifts extended but at the same time this makes me feel like I’m missing out on doing things in my life because I’m waiting for them to call because I need money.  My parents are supportive in financially supporting me especially as a student but it’s hard, I don’t like asking them for money or help that way, they have their own financial issues. Especially since everything gone up and I’m not having consistent pay that I’m anxious I won’t be able to afford just the basic things. I’m not sure what’s to do next, my job and my relationship with my boss allows the flexibility I need for my studies so I don’t really want to look for a new job. </p></div>", "date": "24-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/cost-of-living-and-work-anxiety/td-p/570952" }, { "author": "user-id/2579", "content": "<p>You are fortunate to have the support of the <em>Bank of M&amp;D</em>, but of course it won't make you feel better about making withdrawals to meet your living expenses.<br>How about you keep a <em>ledger</em> of the money you receive from your employment including that which your parents contribute.? Then, when you are able (or earning an abundance) you can repay their kindness and trust in your good nature (plus a little dividend for not seeking some form of understanding prior).<br>As to your hours, there is usually a hierarchy in such things where the longer serving (or more ingratiating) workers receive favour. However, I would encourage you to dispense with the philosophy of merely working for money - this can transfer subliminally to those in authority to perceive some diversion from company interests and ultimately work against you.<br>Failing that, you might take on another job before deciding which works best for you. Some preparedness for sacrifice of what you want to do is often par for the course in rising through the ranks of the workforce.</p></div>", "date": "25-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/cost-of-living-and-work-anxiety/td-p/570952" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48370", "content": "<p>What a month. <br>\nI’m disabled and hubby is my carer, and the last month has been hell.</p>\n\n<p>My sister sold her house after her hubby passed from cancer, so we (hubby) had to help her move, that was ok. <br>\nA friend has tenants in his house and while he is away at work I look after things. I get a call the day my sister is moving to say there has been a fire at the house, so my daughter and son in law helped with boarding up windows. That began the nightmare with tenants insurance company who are not doing their job at all. We feel so bad for tenant who is a single mum with 5 boys. <br>\nNumber three on my list, four days after sister moving and fire, my 84 year old mum broke her tibia and fibula. <br>\nI’ve had to go to Perth, we live in the country, and stay with my daughter so I can visit mum. It’s so hard as hubby has to stay with our animals, so my health has taken a nose dive. I can’t shower myself nor dress myself some days, so the task has fallen to my daughter when I’m there. </p>\n\n<p>my sisters want to put mum in a nursing home but mum isn’t ready for that yet, so she is coming to stay with us while her leg heals. My hubby has been getting the house ready as the OT did an inspection and told us we needed to do a few things. He started on the list and he broke a rib, so life has been a massive struggle the last few days.</p>\n\n<p>I’m just so overwhelmed as I don’t want to let mum down and have to send her into a care facility, I don’t want to let the tenant down from the property as she was homeless for 8 months prior to my friend renting her the house, I don’t want to let my friend down because he doesn’t have anyone else to help whim with all the insurance stuff. <br>\nI feel like I’m drowning some days. </p></div>", "date": "25-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/overwhelmed/td-p/570968" }, { "author": "user-id/19707", "content": "<p>Hi, welcome</p><p> </p><p>I can recall 40 years or so working in a pizza restaurant and people shouting at me for their pizzas. My boss had hurt his back so couldnt attend and my casual worker called in sick.</p><p> </p><p>Everytime a person yelled I took 10 seconds away from my work and quietly told them \"I have one other speed and that is slower\". And stared at them when I said it. Two customers left. The rest kept quiet.</p><p> </p><p>I dont know if it's this era or not but I suspect it is, that people are less considerate and show less kindness. Not to say they arent kind in general but people are thinking more for themselves in a new era of \"who shouts loudest gets served quickest\". I think you are currently experiencing the worst of that and the fate of a run of bad luck all at once.</p><p> </p><p>There is only one answer to this- take a step back and breathe deep and long, take every 3rd day off to just chill out and while you are doing that pat yourself on the back for your efforts considering your restrictions. Say to yourself \"I am wonderful, I've got determination, I will succeed but I have to look after myself, \"charity begins at home\".</p><p> </p><p>It isnt easy saying \"NO\". You can say it calmly and compassionately and other people should accept that and find others to help them out. Why dont they? The reason might surprise you... people like you are a \"soft touch\" in that they know they can call on you anytime and you will say yes, you will run to the rescue so to speak. </p><p> </p><p>A good friend once told me \"imagine if it was reversed, if any situation came your way and you needed them, would they down tools, take a day off work to help you accordingly\"?</p><p> </p><p>If no then you know where Charity begins...</p><p>Take care</p><p> </p><p>TonyWK</p><p> </p><p>It's time to put YOU first.</p></div>", "date": "25-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/overwhelmed/td-p/570968" }, { "author": "user-id/2579", "content": "<p>Well the old saying <em>\"Bad things always happen in threes\"</em> fits perfectly here (although we shall count Hubby's rib as 'self imposed' to lighten your load).<br>I commend you on your selflessness and capacity to prioritise tasks in tending the needs of your mother - healing may take some time for the elderly and sadly you might need to consider all options for her care to ensure she receives the best outcomes.<br>Insurance will be going through the process of assessing the claim and that takes as long as it needs. All you (and the tenant) can do is be patient.<br>Doing the best we can is never 'letting anyone down' even if not living up to expectations.<br>But in the vain of platitudes, remember that <em>\"this too shall pass\" </em>(and things usually have a way of falling into place without our absolute control).<br>Perhaps you will receive reassurance from the way people come together in times of need. This can sustain you through the ordeal and provide comfort in family and faith in human nature, but somehow I feel you already have that awareness.</p></div>", "date": "25-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/overwhelmed/td-p/570968" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/16720", "content": "Why do people fake their coughs when I’m around. I’m getting anxiety when I hear people do it. It really hurts. What is wrong with me. At the moment I’m listening to people fake cough on YouTube so I can get used to it but it damages me. I feel like I’m rejected wherever I go.</div>", "date": "24-10-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/what-did-i-do/td-p/1805/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/43888", "content": "<p>I am exactly the same your not the only person in the world that people cough sniff or rub their noses </p><p>It's not what u are thinking ppl are trying to help you </p><p>You need to overcome it to figure it out and listen </p></div>", "date": "06-08-2022", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/what-did-i-do/td-p/1805/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/48373", "content": "<p>I have experience this also. First of all I want to say you’re not crazy. Second of all I’m surprised why so many people know so little about this bullying tactic. The coughs are fake but not so obviously fake, they are put on coughs. Definitely to mess with you psychologically somehow I don’t get why what’s the need of this kind of passive aggression. It makes you feel unwanted. </p><p><br>e.g. </p><p>I walk up to a group of friends &amp; some other people. The “others” we both know of each other, but we aren’t exactly friends. Everything was fine. Until I walked over there. When I walked over there, all of a sudden they were having a coughing fit. They felt the need to cough, but the whole time I was sitting in the corner of the room observing they did not cough. Until I was right there in their proximity.</p><p> </p><p>I think they do this to make you feel out of place, unwanted, unwelcome and uncomfortable. </p><p>I never make accounts much, are usually just read what people post, but I made this account, so you know you arent alone. This needs to have more awareness spread to it, with less stigma of people being crazy.</p></div>", "date": "25-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/what-did-i-do/td-p/1805/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/48373", "content": "<p>How are they helping anything?</p></div>", "date": "25-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/what-did-i-do/td-p/1805/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/16720", "content": "Why do people fake their coughs when I’m around. I’m getting anxiety when I hear people do it. It really hurts. What is wrong with me. At the moment I’m listening to people fake cough on YouTube so I can get used to it but it damages me. I feel like I’m rejected wherever I go.</div>", "date": "24-10-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/what-did-i-do/td-p/1805" }, { "author": "user-id/42565", "content": "<p>Hey Justin,</p>\n<p>Welcome to the forums and thanks for reaching out here. It sounds like you are going through a hard time, i'm sorry about that. Have you spoken to anyone about your anxiety, If you are feeling anxious around people when they cough? If you haven't, I would recommend to see your GP and ask for a referral to a psychologist or a counsellor to talk about the problem. I think you might feel anxious because of the pandemic and the uncertainty it brings. Now with everything opening up and life is somewhat returning back to normal, it is making you anxious when you hear people cough. It is normal to feel anxious about COVID even if you are vaccinated. I think it could be something some people experience now, but eventually things will get better soon. Hope this helps. Thanks. </p></div>", "date": "24-10-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/what-did-i-do/td-p/1805" }, { "author": "user-id/37850", "content": "<p>Hello Justin95,</p>\n<p>I don't really understand, so, I'd like to ask, what are people are doing that tells you they are faking coughs around you?</p>\n<p>You don't know them, they don't know you, is that correct? If so, why would they do this?</p>\n<p>I am just trying to understand.</p>\n<p>I am also hopeful that as more people are vaccinated, &amp; boosters are given as well, &amp; fewer people end up in hospitals, with serious illness from COVID-19, all our anxious feelings around COVID-19 will ease.</p>\n<p>&amp; why the bleep would people on YouTube be posting videos of themselves faking coughs?</p>\n<p>I think it would be better to find someone, a counsellor, therapist, psychologist or psychiatrist to help you with what you are experiencing. If you have not done so, your GP is a good place to start. </p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: inherit; color: #333333; background-color: #ffffff;\">mmMekitty</span></p></div>", "date": "24-10-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/what-did-i-do/td-p/1805" }, { "author": "user-id/16720", "content": "Because Mr Pussycat Strangers cough at me because they want to startle me or bully me psychologically. And people post YouTube videos of theme selves coughing to illustrate their intellectual superiority. I hope you catch on;)</div>", "date": "24-10-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/what-did-i-do/td-p/1805" }, { "author": "user-id/37850", "content": "<p>Hi Justin95,</p>\n<p>I'm still not really getting this, unless these strangers &amp; people on YouTube have nothing better to do???? &amp; why YOU, specifically? I don't know you, &amp; I don't feel any urge to fake coughing for any effect whatsoever. I wonder why people waste their own time posting videos of themselves acting as if they actually have no sense at all. If they are trying to prove their superiority, in my opinion, they have failed.</p>\n<p>Truly, if, while you are out in public places, &amp; you think someone is faking coughing to startle or bully you, the best way to respond is to not react. You could wear earphones &amp; play music, so a sudden noise will not so easily startle you.</p>\n<p>If watching the videos is not helping, then I think it's time to talk to someone about this problem. It is too disruptive to your life &amp; your emotions.</p>\n<p>All the best,</p>\n<p>mmMekitty</p></div>", "date": "24-10-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/what-did-i-do/td-p/1805" }, { "author": "user-id/16720", "content": "I have next door neighbours that cough and sneeze loudly on purpose, they don’t know me but they can see through walls so they know what I’m doing, for example if I’m having a good time playing video games the neighbours will cough. I know it seems ridiculous but that’s what a believe no matter what other people think. Also it is really hard to ignore the coughs because it eats my hope for Jesus. I see a psychologist that also happens to cough but she insists she has a sore throat, yet I know she’s just a power hungry citizen. I HONESTLY act as if I’m doing something busy like reading because they can see me through my bedroom, these citizens are eating my freedom.</div>", "date": "25-10-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/what-did-i-do/td-p/1805" }, { "author": "user-id/16720", "content": "Passive aggressive bullying like fake coughing and sniffing really drops my mood and self esteem. This type of sneaky bullying really has impacted my mental health. To me whenever I hear a stranger cough it feels as if a judge just said “Order, order in the court!” This bullying implies my lack capabilities and an adjustment in intellect is needed. How do you cope with this type of bullying.? Just curious</div>", "date": "25-10-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/what-did-i-do/td-p/1805" }, { "author": "user-id/37850", "content": "<p>Hello Justin95,</p>\n<p>When I had been bullied, the one thing that helped the most was realising the bullying was not actually about me. Sure, it was aimed at me, but no, really, the bullies have issues of their own that have nothing to do with me. I could not care a crap what they say or do anymore, because I know it's not about me. Even if they were to yell my name, I KNOW it is not about me. </p>\n<p>Often, bullies are lonely people, who feel small &amp; powerless. I feel sad there are people who spend their precious time being mean to others. There are many,, many far better things to do with the time we have.</p>\n<p>I'm curious, have you asked your Psychologist for ideas about how to cope with the bullying? </p>\n<p>mmMekitty</p></div>", "date": "27-10-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/what-did-i-do/td-p/1805" }, { "author": "user-id/16720", "content": "I’ve been seeing the same Psychologist for 2years. The only advice I get is to relax and practice deep breathing. How the hell can I relax when I’m getting bullied? I’ve applied these coping strategies, but the bullying gets even worse when I relax. When they see me relax they think my intellect is taking a vacation while theirs are supercharged. They want me to apply my intellectual capabilities. I disagree when you say they are powerless, I definitely believe they have power. Just like a court room judge has the power to say “Order, order in the court!”.</div>", "date": "27-10-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/what-did-i-do/td-p/1805" }, { "author": "user-id/16720", "content": "Post: Hi my name is Justin and I think there is something wrong with me. Let me explain, my social anxiety has reached its severity when I dropped out of high school 4 years ago. During my time of unemployment I rarely go outside because people always fake their coughs and sneeze when they look at me. I’m not precise what’s causing them to do it, maybe they don’t like me or they think I’m beneath them. I have a theory but it seems ridiculous, when my intellects condition is shut down the bullies will assess me and fake their cough to illustrate their superiority. They want to startle me and want me to revise my citizenship capabilities, in other words update my mentality. I am applying my best to act like a productive member of society. These passive aggressive bullies are preventing me from going back to school. School is their breeding ground. They are power hungry and domineering reptilians. Why would they be so mean if they could spread positivity instead. Whenever I hear people fake cough of sniff it’s as if a power hungry court room judge yells “Order, order in the court!”</div>", "date": "30-10-2021", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/what-did-i-do/td-p/1805" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p> I hope im posting in the right section .   I have started to accept that my anxiety and depression are not my fault and in a way its a bit of a comfort.  It has cost me so much ,relationships,employement and family ties..  Im scared of where its taking me but im 56 and have fought hard for so long and yes im tired of it. </p><p>Do i  have to explain it to everyone who asks why im not working or functioning well? I was wondering have others found themselves at a similar stage.</p><p>Love and best wishes to everyone.      Brett</p><p> </p></div>", "date": "06-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/acceptance-of-what-is-and-peoples-experience-of-the-same/td-p/569578/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/1665", "content": "<p>Brett/Beaser,</p><p> </p><p>Thank you for sharing how you feel with us. </p><p> </p><p>You've explained it perfectly. It's a sort of tired realisation that anxiety and/or depression have taken so much from us and that we've sacrificed so much of ourselves to try and overcome them, when sometimes the best thing to do is to learn how to deal with or cope with their existence in our lives. I've reached that realisation a few times, and I like to keep track of these kinds of realisations in my journal for future reference. </p><p> </p><p>Have you ever received any professional advice or support for your anxiety or depression? How have you typically learned to manage them when they're affecting aspects of your life, if you'd feel comfortable sharing?</p><p> </p><p>SB</p></div>", "date": "09-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/acceptance-of-what-is-and-peoples-experience-of-the-same/td-p/569578/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Hi Sbella and thanks for your reply.</p><p>I have had different professional support for the last 30 odd years.  Currently my GP and phycologist are my support and a couple of  special friends. </p><p>If im honest i haven't managed too well at times and made some poor decisions with things like work and relationships  . At the moment im just trying to manage day  by day but am struggling badly at times. </p><p>Always happy to talk more ad thank you   </p><p>Brett</p><p> </p></div>", "date": "10-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/acceptance-of-what-is-and-peoples-experience-of-the-same/td-p/569578/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/14386", "content": "<p>Son and I are members of the Lions club. My son used to play in early teen years, but injury in AFL interfered with swimming. When he played we did the volunteered in all areas of the game. Son is now an assistant coach for an U10 team. In these moments though ... it's a good way to get the mind into a better place. At least that is what i found.</p></div>", "date": "10-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/acceptance-of-what-is-and-peoples-experience-of-the-same/td-p/569578/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/40334", "content": "<p>Hi Brett</p><p> </p><p>It's amazing how much inner dialogue we have to battle through to reach the conclusion 'It's not my fault that I can feel so deeply and so easily under a variety of circumstances'. If we can <em>feel</em> what's depressing, that's not our fault. If we can <em>feel</em> what's anxiety inducing, that's not our fault.</p><p> </p><p>When others are able to relate to feelings we experience, it's a relief. For the less able, trying to explain it to them can become somewhat of a compulsion. I like to look at it as us being <strong>reasonable</strong> people, being <strong>able</strong> to offer <strong>reason</strong> to others so they can come to relate in some way or perhaps so they are not so harsh in their judgement. Some folk just can't relate or they refuse to listen to reason and that's <em>also</em> not our fault. I learned not to waste my breath on those who refuse to listen to reason. It's such a time saver.</p><p> </p><p>These days I sometimes 1) just tell it how it is on occasion or 2) tend to question more. I've found such approaches to be natural self esteem boosters under certain circumstances. A third approach comes down to leading people to relate in some way. So...</p><ol><li>could involve 'You know I can <em>feel</em> what you just said to me. You know what you said is depressing and it doesn't matter how much you deny it, I can still feel it'</li><li>could involve questioning 'Why can you <em>not</em> feel the amount of anxiety inducing challenges I face? Why do <em>you</em> not feel the need to help me lighten the load?'</li><li>doesn't necessarily involve comparing a similar situation, such as navigating heavy traffic for example. For one person this may feel overwhelmingly stressful whereas for another they may love the challenge. It's about picking another person's most stressful experience and speaking of the <em>feelings</em> involved in that. It's about relating to the <em>feelings, </em>not the situation - what is felt as breathtaking/suffocating, sickening, heart racing, overwhelming etc.</li></ol><p>One of the things I love most about sensitive people (those who can easily sense what's potentially depressing or anxiety inducing) is...they will <em>try</em> and get a feel for what we're facing. They may then take it even further by wondering <em>with</em> us as to why we could feeling that way. Sensitive people rarely leave us to wonder alone. With <em>in</em>sensitive people, we're typically on our own. Easy to <em>sense</em> the difference between the two <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":beaming_face_with_smiling_eyes:\">😁</span></p></div>", "date": "11-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/acceptance-of-what-is-and-peoples-experience-of-the-same/td-p/569578/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Thank you TR.</p><p>Its always good to hear from you and you make some great points.</p><p>You are so right about not wasting our time on those who refuse to listen. Ive learnt the importance of choosing my battles.    </p><p> </p><p>Best wishes for the day   Brett</p></div>", "date": "12-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/acceptance-of-what-is-and-peoples-experience-of-the-same/td-p/569578/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/14386", "content": "<p><span>Hi Beaser. </span></p><p> </p><p><span>You're right about not wasting our time on people who just won't listen. </span><span>It's a lesson that has taught me to save my efforts for those who are actually willing to engage in meaningful conversations. Perhaps the only downside is that sometimes you have to start that conversation to find out. Hope your weekend turned out OK.</span></p></div>", "date": "16-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/acceptance-of-what-is-and-peoples-experience-of-the-same/td-p/569578/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Hi S.W</p><p>Hope your going ok.  Sorry for the late reply.</p><p>Your right about saving our efforts for those who are willing to engage and listen. </p><p>Its refreshing to talk to some and draining with others.</p><p>Brett.</p></div>", "date": "25-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/acceptance-of-what-is-and-peoples-experience-of-the-same/td-p/569578/page/2" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p> I hope im posting in the right section .   I have started to accept that my anxiety and depression are not my fault and in a way its a bit of a comfort.  It has cost me so much ,relationships,employement and family ties..  Im scared of where its taking me but im 56 and have fought hard for so long and yes im tired of it. </p><p>Do i  have to explain it to everyone who asks why im not working or functioning well? I was wondering have others found themselves at a similar stage.</p><p>Love and best wishes to everyone.      Brett</p><p> </p></div>", "date": "06-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/acceptance-of-what-is-and-peoples-experience-of-the-same/td-p/569578" }, { "author": "user-id/14386", "content": "<p>hello and welcome.</p><p> </p><p>Firstly, I think you are posting in the right section. If not, the post would have been moved. </p><p> </p><p>my short answer to your question is ... NO.</p><p> </p><p>The longer answer is ...</p><p> </p><p>Acceptance can indeed be a comfort, as it helps us recognize that these struggles are not our fault. It sounds like you've faced numerous challenges due to your mental health, and that can be really tough. Feeling tired after fighting for so long is completely natural.</p><p> </p><p>As for explaining your situation to others ... how much you want to share is up to you. Some people may be understanding and supportive, while others might not fully grasp the complexities of mental health. You don't owe anyone an explanation if you don't feel up to it.</p><p> </p><p>Part of the reason I am here on the forums is that I have found my tribe here. People who understand what it's like, have an understanding of what I go through. While I have not been in the same situation as you, there maybe other who are in the same boat and relate to what you're going through. Keep reaching out for support and take care of yourself.</p><p> </p><p>Listening to you.</p><p> </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "06-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/acceptance-of-what-is-and-peoples-experience-of-the-same/td-p/569578" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Thank you Smallwolf.</p><p>Youre response makes a lot of sense.  I guess people from all different walks of life may at times feel judged or  that there is a  lack of understanding from others. </p><p>I have always been a pretty quiet sort of person anyway so not opening up to people may not surprise them.   Brett   </p></div>", "date": "07-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/acceptance-of-what-is-and-peoples-experience-of-the-same/td-p/569578" }, { "author": "user-id/47893", "content": "<p>Hi Brett</p><p>Oh I know how tiring it is. At times, it's overwhelming and debilitating at that. I'm 59 and remember my depression, anxiety and even my OCD at 4 years of age. I am looking forward to getting to retirement so I don't have to explain anymore about not working here and there because I'm not coping. No family connections for me. Always the black sheep, despite never doing anything to anyone. Relationships....I'm so hearing you. It seems at times that noone can possibly understand you unless they are feeling it themselves. Even my social phobia gets remarks of 'arrogance' because i can't be around people for too long anymore. It's not a place of arrogance I am coming from, I just can't manage people for any length of time, so much so that nowadays I shop online, but that's another show lol. I hope you're hanging in there and doing ok. </p></div>", "date": "07-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/acceptance-of-what-is-and-peoples-experience-of-the-same/td-p/569578" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Thanks for your kind reply Fairmaiden.</p><p>You seem to understand what  im trying to say. Sadly for you, you have had a similar path.</p><p>I am hanging in there be it some tough days. </p><p>Im offf to the footy today so that will get  me around some of my tribe.  </p><p>Im hoping youre ok and hope to hear how your weekend  goes or just  how you are going in general .</p><p>Brett</p><p> </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "08-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/acceptance-of-what-is-and-peoples-experience-of-the-same/td-p/569578" }, { "author": "user-id/10213", "content": "<p>People only understand what they want to understand. Society loves to judge. No one in their right mind would choose to struggle in life with anxiety and depression. But as much as you try and explain that to people, they just don't get it. It's because they can't see the problem, so they don't believe you. You don't have to justify yourself to anyone.</p></div>", "date": "08-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/acceptance-of-what-is-and-peoples-experience-of-the-same/td-p/569578" }, { "author": "user-id/14386", "content": "<p>It also OK to be a quiet person. Life would be boring if we were all the same. </p><p> </p><p>what football team do you support?</p><p> </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "08-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/acceptance-of-what-is-and-peoples-experience-of-the-same/td-p/569578" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Hi Smallwolf.</p><p>Thanks for the kind reply.   I am a Western Bulldogs member/supporter and also heavily involved with my local club.   Its a bit of a saviour for me as i do some volunteerig there ad get around good people.     Brett.</p></div>", "date": "09-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/acceptance-of-what-is-and-peoples-experience-of-the-same/td-p/569578" }, { "author": "user-id/34059", "content": "<p>Thank You David for your reply.</p><p>You make a very valid point that no one in there right mind would want too experience anxiety and dpression.  I would never wish it on anyone either.   </p><p>Ive been through my share of physical pain playing contact sport and scrapes and scraps but would take that anytime before my mental heath issues..</p><p> Bestt wishes    Brett.</p></div>", "date": "09-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/acceptance-of-what-is-and-peoples-experience-of-the-same/td-p/569578" }, { "author": "user-id/10213", "content": "<p>Society has no compassion for things they don't understand. Just my experience. Even though mental health concerns are often more permanent and debilitating than physical injuries. So don't listen to the guilt that other ignorant people project onto you. I've never apologised for catching a cold. I don't see why we need to \"apologise\" to others for feeling like crap.</p></div>", "date": "09-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/acceptance-of-what-is-and-peoples-experience-of-the-same/td-p/569578" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/47740", "content": "<p>The pathway to healing from your mental health is different for everyone and today I want to talk about ways I used to heal from my situation and the condition I have and how I recovered from it. I want to talk about my diabetes and what a challenge and what steps I took to keep myself fit and healthy and on my healing pathway. About 4 years ago I was diagnosed as a type 2 diabetic and when I heard this I thought my life was over and I was scared I know when you first get your diagnosis of a chronic condition it is terrifying but I decided to talk to my nutritionist and my doctors. The first thing was I changed my diet and started eating more fruits and vegtables less processed food which means no chips, choclate and icecream I was sad but I wanted to live long so I started reading about different foods and I switched to the meditaranian diet more more fish less red meat and healthy salads everyday. It was hard but I realised I could become a disciplinced jedi and change my eating habits and save my life in the process.</p><p> </p><p>The next story was when I was 11 and I was diagnosed with my epilepsy and I would have grand Mal seizures and would end up in hospital during school and that brought fear but I said to myself just thing positve and focus on getting better. It is very important in these situations to head medical advice. I still can't drive due to my epilepsy which makes it difficult to find a job.</p><p> </p><p>I was a time of great fear for my parents dad would stay at night and mum during the day my parents are my heroes. I know there are many families like mine who go through this and you must never feel you are alone the community always stands behind you to love and support you through your difficult time.</p><p> </p><p>The next story happened when I was 15 and I was diagnosed with bipolar it still is a struggle to this day. I have manic episodes and depressive episodes and I know there are others in the community who suffer through this as well.</p><p> </p><p>I decided to not let this defeat me I decided to listen to my parents and my doctors and do things to keep myself well. I cycle 40min on a stationary bike to keep fit. I read and many books as i can. I do my meditation in the morning and love listening to music the temptation are my favourite.</p><p> </p><p>As a person with a disability I think I was not meant to live an ordinary life. I think all people with a disability are extrordinary and you must have the love and self beleif that you are powerful beyond measure and you will face adversity.</p></div>", "date": "07-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/my-healing-pathway/td-p/569639" }, { "author": "user-id/10213", "content": "<p>You certainly have an amazing attitude</p></div>", "date": "08-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/my-healing-pathway/td-p/569639" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48131", "content": "<p>About 2 years ago I had a random episode of anaphylaxis whilst eating on my lunch break. Fortunately, I work in a hospital and I was able to attend the ED straight away. <br>But since then I’ve developed a lot of fear and anxiety around eating.</p><p>I physically can not eat some things. I have designated foods that are “safe” (stuff like Jatz biscuits, plain rice cakes, peas, potato, very bland things, they can’t have any flavour or spice on them) but anything else I eat makes me panic. I will try and eat something I’ve eaten a million times before but then make myself panic, I can feel my heart racing, I feel like my throat is swelling and I can’t swallow, and I find I need to then pace or drink excessive amounts of fluid to try and wash my throat. I miss being carefree, I miss being able to go out for meals, I miss not even having to think twice before eating, there are so many amazing yummy foods I love that I just can’t eat. I have no diagnosed allergies, but I do have intolerances to dairy and lactose (they present gastrointestinal<span>). I don’t want to live like this any more. I want to be able to eat, and be carefree, and go out socially, and do all these things but I can’t. I’ve seen a psychologist over the phone but I didn’t find it helped much. Outside of trying to force myself to try things (exposure therapy) which I have tried but doesn’t work, I don’t know what to do. There’s got to be light at the end of the tunnel, but I don’t know how to get there. I’m not suicidal or self harming please don’t think that, I just want to be fixed and be better but I don’t know how. </span></p></div>", "date": "06-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/food-allergy-anxiety/td-p/569599" }, { "author": "user-id/43559", "content": "<p>Have you had all the allergies tested like food allergies?  I had/ have the same thing like I’m not allergic to anything pre turning 40 hit 40 allergic to dairy, nuts,eggs ,apples.strawberry it’s madness know how u feel I’ve gone since Dec none of these foods that cause a reaction and slowly reintroducing foods ( my reaction was not anaphylaxis but fact , lips swell, eyes swell, rashes  all over my body it’s really difficult but I have ever ever so slightly introduced foods again so far so good I mostly have a clean diet of chicken,fish &amp; veggies &amp; fruit list like close to 20 kg doing this elimination plan but it’s slowly slowing down the reaction to foods.</p><p> </p><p>is it possibly you may have a leaky gut ? Have u had rast tests ?</p><p>see ur gp for allergy testing?</p><p> </p><p>it will get better it will <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":dolphin:\">🐬</span></p></div>", "date": "07-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/food-allergy-anxiety/td-p/569599" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/12892", "content": "<p>I have always been an introvert my whole life and I am a socially awkward person. I tend to avoid meeting new people and never initiate conversations out of the fear of judgement. I am currently living in a share house with 3 other people, they are all very close to each other but I am always spending time in my room because I always avoid social interactions. I know they never want to inflict harm on me or anything but from my past experience, every time I speak up or be social people would be like \"wow she talks!\" and things like that so it makes me nervous to do that now, even to new people. Because of this, I am very much socially awkward and I struggle a lot to make new friends. Making friends as an adult is already a difficult enough thing to do, let alone when you have anxiety. I have never really talked to my housemates at all (apart from small talks) and so sometimes I feel very lonely at home. In my previous share house, my housemate told me I'm like a hermit, always hiding in my room and that made me feel so bad about myself. I really want to change and go out there to meet new people but my anxiety makes it so hard to talk to others. I will stutter, my arms will tremble, and I usually can't focus on the conversation. Does anyone else share the same problem? If so, how do you overcome this?</p>\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "12-11-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/introvert-but-lonely/td-p/515769" }, { "author": "user-id/29311", "content": "<p>Hey daisy211, </p>\n<p>I definitely hear you on this and I'm sure many other people in the forums will agree. Even if they don't mean it to, people commenting on how quiet we are can make us even less likely to want to talk. </p>\n<p>For me, sometimes I find it easier to start with one-on-one conversations. From what you've said about your housemates, it seems like because they're close, it's easy to feel left out if you talk to them as a group. Maybe if you talk to them one at a time it will be easier to have a conversation? Another thing you could try is just doing things in a common area instead of your room (for example, watching a tv show on the couch, doing work at the dining table or eating in the kitchen). Even if you're not directly interacting with them, it shows that you're not trying to isolate yourself and you can see/speak to your housemates as they pass you. Hopefully this will build up to longer conversations. </p>\n<p>This one can be hard, but sometimes we need to give people the benefit of the doubt and give them a chance to react well without assuming they'll react badly (I know this is much easier said than done). You mentioned that in the past people have made comments when you do eventually speak up - which is so frustrating - but I hope that your housemates would not do the same if you tried to speak to them. </p>\n<p>Another thing that I've done a couple of times in the past is a movie night. It's a nice relaxing thing that you could do with your housemates and you can make occasional comments without the need to hold a full conversation. Once the movie is done you can talk about it, or other similar movies which is a good, safe conversation topic. If you're worried about initiating something like this, you could just say you're watching a movie and invite anyone to join if they want. Maybe you could ask what kind of movies or tv shows they like? <span style=\"font-size: inherit;\">Some other generally safe conversation topics are pets, sports/hobbies and music. </span></p>\n<p>One last thing - that I still struggle with but I'm getting better all the time and it makes a huge difference - is try not to let a couple of awkward conversations get you down too much. Some of my best friends today started off as very awkward interactions but eventually we found things to talk about and became more comfortable around each other.</p>\n<p>Good luck and don't be so hard on yourself. I hope your housemates turn out to be really nice and feel free to come back and let us know how you go <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span></p>\n<p> </p>\n<p> </p></div>", "date": "14-11-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/introvert-but-lonely/td-p/515769" }, { "author": "user-id/26960", "content": "<p>Hi Daisy,</p>\n<p>I can fully sympathise with your predicament. However, I’d say you’re doing better than you give yourself credit: the fact that you’re aware you’ve got an introverted personality but you still want friends is a great step. I used to believe I was an introvert so much that whenever I had feelings of wanting more from life or wanting to reach out to others, I actively dismissed those feelings or pretended they didn’t exist. You know what you want and that’s a good first step.</p>\n<p>Firstly, I’d perhaps try speak to a GP. You may have some form of social anxiety, however minute, that they can diagnose and give you help on. So much of my perspective on life and myself changed when I found out that I wasn’t alone and that people my age (23) and older still have these issues and don’t have to suffer alone. As for some advice - it really sucks that the few times you’ve made an effort, your housemates have either shunned or made fun of you. However I feel that honesty is the best policy - if you muster up the courage to tell one of them personally, that you’ve got social anxiety, if they’re nice people, they’ll know not to give you negative attention when you do reach out.</p>\n<p>It’s important not to let the past define you. You’ve got your whole life to figure things out and a few awkward moments or conversations don’t define you. </p>\n<p>I think taking these simple steps/goals will help you heaps. Feel free to come back and ask for more advice and let us know how you’re going <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span> you’ve got this.</p></div>", "date": "14-11-2020", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/introvert-but-lonely/td-p/515769" }, { "author": "user-id/48140", "content": "<p>Dear Daisy,</p><p>I know what you are going through, my life has also been similar to yours. Not able to initiate conversation and that stutter,always alone, I know.</p><p>But this past year, I took therapy and it really helped. </p><p>Firstly, you should not think that others will judge you, no one gives a damn about anyone, I don't want to be hypocritical, but I everyday say to myself and it kinda help you make yourself belief.</p><p>Try to meditate atleast 2-3 minutes, it will help in suppressing negative thoughts, literally it works.</p><p> </p><p>My anxiety quite high, that I used to stutter while speaking so I learnt a technique so suppress it, it was air flow technique. In this you have to take a breath and make words come out of your mouth with the exhaling air from lungs, Google it, it's worth.</p><p> </p><p>And everyday make a goal to call any two people everyday, force yourself.</p><p> </p><p>You can also call unknown numbers, just search any other city's college or university helpline and try to ask any query, I do that I lot, at starting it's fearful job but you will get used to it.</p><p> </p><p>And daily talk less but talk to anyone slowly, that's important, it will build up confidence.</p><p> </p><p>I know the things doesn't seem to work but believe try to make a habit out of it and you will change.</p><p> </p><p>After doing the things I told you, sometimes I get anxiety but still I get back as I meditate and do the stuff I told you </p><p> </p><p>Hope it will help, i know it's not that detailed but we all get from this, i know this world seems ferocious at times but you know we can be just fine.</p><p> </p><p>Believe in yourself, i mean it</p><p>Take care </p></div>", "date": "07-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/introvert-but-lonely/td-p/515769" }, { "author": "user-id/47893", "content": "<p>Hi</p><p>Yes, this is me all over. I had to do the share house thing probably 9 times in the last 15 years after leaving a long term DV situation. I am in a rental myself now and I thank God for that much atm. I can't deal with people and never know what to say as I always appear to be the black sheep with the opposite opinion to everyone else, so I gave up humiliating myself. My social phobia cut in more towards 35, after years and years of just trying to be accepted but to date I still fit in nowhere, and like you, I always spent all my time in my room by myself and received lots of judgement for that, when I wasn't even hurting anyone. Some people see this as arrogance but it's fear and some frustration. I also don't don't do shops or visitors well</p></div>", "date": "07-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/introvert-but-lonely/td-p/515769" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/34390", "content": "<p>Hiya, </p><p>I'm looking for some support and advice. I'm currently in Queensland visiting family that I hadn't seen since pre covid, and I'm going home to Victoria tomorrow. </p><p>I hate the fact that I won't see my mum's family for at least another years, and I also get incredibly anxious during flights. Does anyone have any tips for either of these things? </p><p>Thanks, </p><p>Bee</p></div>", "date": "04-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/holiday-ending-and-flight-anxiety/td-p/569399" }, { "author": "user-id/21500", "content": "<p>Good Morning,</p><p>I hope you're doing okay today, and if not, know that that's okay too! This is something I have to remind myself as well when feel overwhelmed and anxious. I think it is a natural human response to feel sad and unsettled when saying goodbye to loved ones for what may be a long time. That shows how much connection there is and how valuable these relationships are to you. Sadness is the right feeling sometimes.</p><p> </p><p>Flight anxiety is also very common. I know several people (some very well) who avoid flying if possible. Mix in the sadness you are feeling and that's a pretty heady cocktail of difficult feelings. I know this maelstrom of feelings too, and it's really tough. Is there anyone you can share your feelings with at this time? Even via text can be useful to unburden yourself and benefit from some moral support.</p><p> </p><p>I tell myself that my first job in life is to look after myself. Do what you know will help you manage your travel today, and remember that the feelings you are having are natural, human feelings that make sense in your situation.</p><p>Go well,</p><p> </p><p>Annas</p></div>", "date": "05-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/holiday-ending-and-flight-anxiety/td-p/569399" }, { "author": "user-id/31621", "content": "<p>Hi Bee,</p><p> </p><p>I do understanding your feelings. I think it's a good idea to keep regular chat with your family over the phone/video calls, invite them to your Melbourne home, or plan a travel to a third place together.</p><p> </p><p>And how was your flying back to Melbourne? Hope everything was fine. Feel free to update here <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span></p><p> </p><p>Mark</p></div>", "date": "07-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/holiday-ending-and-flight-anxiety/td-p/569399" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/451", "content": "<p>I guess I just need somewhere to vent, but if anyone has some advice I would be grateful.</p><p> </p><p>I feel like I should be able to take care of myself better and actually be able to  manage the things I need to do, but it just never seems to work out that way. </p><p> </p><p>I'm perpetually tired and stressed and would rather just stay home and do \"nothing\" than pretty much anything I should be doing. </p><p> </p><p>I always feel like I work so hard and get nothing done.</p><p> </p><p>I try and try and try to do well at work and tick things off my to do list but never seen to make any progress.</p><p> </p><p>Although a<span>t the same time if I had 6mths with no responsibilities I think I would just curl up into a ball and hide, and then want more time off after that. </span></p><p> </p><p><span>I know that doesn't make much sense. Basically I feel overwhelmed but I don't think I should be because all I'm really doing is working (4 days a week) and then recovering from work...</span></p><p> </p><p>Is this a symptom of depression?</p><p> </p><p>I have always had anxiety, and have been diagnosed with OCD. Personally I think I have also had depression in some aspect since high school (I'm in my mid 20s now), but I haven't been officially diagnosed. </p><p> </p><p>Idk what the point of this post is. Maybe if someone has experienced something similar and has some tips that would help?</p><p> </p><p>Thank you to anyone that read this far</p><p> </p></div>", "date": "17-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-like-life-shouldn-t-be-this-hard/td-p/568134" }, { "author": "user-id/44313", "content": "<p>Hi Aussie.Girl</p><p> </p><p>I relate with almost everything you're feeling. You aren't alone and just wanted you to know you're heard.</p><p> </p><p>Even doing nothing is dreadful, since you feel like you should be making the most of your free time but find yourself doing nothing at all since that's how your body's feeling. There's never that relaxing period, just that something's always not quite right.</p><p> </p><p>It sounds to me you're suffering from anxiety and depression, as they almost always intertwine. I'm no doctor tho.</p><p> </p><p>I can't offer any good advice since I'm struggling with almost the same apart from work, and when you say if you had 6 months off and you'd just end up curling in a ball and not wanting to go back, I can attest to that.</p><p> </p><p>Am currently seeing a psychologist monthly to try and get myself in order, if you aren't, maybe that'd be a good place to start? If not a visit to the GP if you aren't on any prescription medication atm as you could have a chemical imbalance.</p><p> </p><p>Proud of you for doing what you do. I hope you feel better</p></div>", "date": "19-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-like-life-shouldn-t-be-this-hard/td-p/568134" }, { "author": "user-id/31621", "content": "<p>Hi Aussie.girl,</p><p> </p><p>I'm very sorry for your challenge, I can tell it's frustrating.</p><p> </p><p>It could be a symptom of depression, as you've been losing the motivation of doing anything. However it could also be other mental health issue. Remember, psychological problems cannot be self-diagnosed based on symptoms, we need to go through a professional assessment process. You can talk about your symptoms and concerns with your psychologist, if you still have access to them, alternatively start from your GP for a referral.</p><p> </p><p>I believe that professional diagnosis and treatment will bring you to the right track. Hope everything will be better.</p><p>Mark</p></div>", "date": "20-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-like-life-shouldn-t-be-this-hard/td-p/568134" }, { "author": "user-id/47893", "content": "<p>Hello there. Yes, I am the older version of you++++</p><p>I can relate to every single thing you have said and I know youre thinking that noone is really going to understand because everybody else looks so together. I'm sure all is never as it seems however. Looking back, I can remember doing OCD things when I was four years old. And the depression and anxiety from around 13 years old. But I didn't know what it was and I probably thought everyone felt like this. So I wasn't diagnosed until 40 years later. I remember my second grade school report saying that I \"had a lot of trouble socially\". I can relate to that now. I spent most of my school years in the library or by myself due to social phobia that I never knew about. I hope you can afford to see your doctor and receive the help you need. Please please make it a priority.</p></div>", "date": "20-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-like-life-shouldn-t-be-this-hard/td-p/568134" }, { "author": "user-id/47740", "content": "<p>Good morning</p><p> </p><p>How are you feeling</p><p> </p><p>I think there are many things you can do to get out of the house there are sporting clubs or social clubs. I have a stationary bike that I do everyday as one example. You can jion an art class or a cooking class . The trick is not to be in bed try to come up up with things to do reading is wonderful because it takes you on adventures in your mind. It is important to be social jion netball my sister plays soccer every week build a social network . Maybe pick a recipe to cook and cook at home. My fav is masterchef and dog house Australia. Going fo a walk every day with a friend or your dog i call my dog my bubbe. Have a pet is a wonderful idea for love and compassion they take great care of you.</p><p> </p><p>I beleive that having hope and a candle that guides you out of the darkness will guide you . Never give up and never allow it to take control. Remember say I am beautiful I am powerful I am unique</p><p> </p><p>There are many social things you can do it just to check in your local community of what activities you can do. Some good book recommendation is Agatha christie books. Remain positve and strong and remember we care and want you to stay positive.</p><p> </p><p>Remember you are more powerful then you know you have to find the power within yourself</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>  </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "23-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-like-life-shouldn-t-be-this-hard/td-p/568134" }, { "author": "user-id/48094", "content": "<p>Hi There,<br>Hope you're doing okay. I relate to what you have written.<br>I struggled with bouts of anxiety and depression throughout my childhood and in my teens.<br>I too used to feel that same 'overwhelm' and would always feel 'burnt-out' especially after a day at work.<br><br>I do wonder whether adhd may be relevant to you.. I personally got diagnosed with ADHD in my early 20s and noticed that my depression was purely a cause of that, I then discovered that my ocd was a form of coping with my anxiety. I am now in my late 20s and for the past few years have felt as if i was looking at the world through a clear lens. here is a link to a youtube video 'adhd in girls'  <a href=\"https://youtu.be/dmeE3qTJRUw\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://youtu.be/dmeE3qTJRUw</a><br><br>I do take medication now including anti-anxiety medication on top of adhd meds; which has made a world of difference. I no longer feel so over-whelmed and exhausted. I am able to get on with my day and not feel so burnt-out. Medication may not be for you, and that's okay, for there is many other aspects in life that may be causing you to feel this way and/or other ways of learning to cope and deal with these problems.....<br><br>That being said, exercising and keeping up with essential vitamins (such as vit B- which helps with depression or iron- which can help with many things) are vital to any mental health issues and its very likely that something quite simple may be playing a big part in feeling this way. for example, iron deficiency causes a lot of problems especially for women.<br><br>Although adhd may not be relevant to you, it is definitely worth looking into other mental health conditions that may be causing these feelings other than depression. It is worth it to seek a professional opinion but be mindful that only you, really know you and sometimes professionals get it wrong; in my case i got diagnosed with depression and anxiety for years before understanding that nothing would help until I got help for my adhd.</p><p> </p><p>Another important aspect to consider is 'self-care'. here is a link to a page that I tend to come back to from time-to-time when I'm having off-days...<br><a href=\"https://depts.washington.edu/fammed/wp-content/uploads/2019/03/Katers-selfcare_printable.pdf\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://depts.washington.edu/fammed/wp-content/uploads/2019/03/Katers-selfcare_printable.pdf</a><br><br>I wish you the best on your journey for self-discovery and that you get the best help/advice relevant to you and your situation.</p></div>", "date": "05-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/feeling-like-life-shouldn-t-be-this-hard/td-p/568134" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/19707", "content": "<p>In 2012 after many years I believed I conquered anxiety and in 2017 wrote about it.</p><p> </p><p><a href=\"https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-how-l-eliminated-it/td-p/183873\" target=\"_blank\">https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-how-l-eliminated-it/td-p/183873</a></p><p> </p><p>Since then it has poked its head in and out of my life but I've been able to close the door on each occasion. How?</p><p> </p><p>1. Charity begins at home. Putting your needs first must be a priority. I've noticed with friends this isn't being accomplished. Running grandchildren around and helping out family or friends is not attending to yourself. </p><p>2. Underestimating anxiety. Often others illnesses are visible. Break a leg and watch others swarm around to help. Anxiety isn't so easily repairable and isn't a bbq topic.</p><p>3. Shut down your stress when anxiety returns. Delegate finances, computer issues or child minding. </p><p>4. Do what chills you out. For me it's my train set or tinkering. I used to do jigsaws. </p><p>5. Turn your phone off.</p><p> </p><p>Do you have methods you revert to when anxiety returns? Please share them</p><p> </p><p>TonyWK </p></div>", "date": "28-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-ebb-and-flow/td-p/569017" }, { "author": "user-id/40334", "content": "<p>Hi Tony</p><p> </p><p>I always deeply appreciate your insight. To hold the light (enlightenment) is one thing, to <em>share</em> that light makes a person a lighthouse in sometimes dark and stormy times for others. You're a strong and incredible guiding light who also projects great warmth.</p><p> </p><p>With anxiety being a first time experience for me last year, I could not figure out what the heck was going on with me. Why, at 52, was I experiencing anxiety for the first time? What did it <em>feel</em> like? Where and what were the triggers? How did/do I need to manage them? The quest continued with a lot of questions and some interesting answers or solutions. Life is definitely a 'learn as you go' experience.</p><p> </p><ul><li>First, I renamed anxiety 'hyperactivity'. While a really great and healthy level of activity can <em>feel</em> fantastic while it runs throughout the mind and body, serious <em>hyper </em>activity can feel overwhelming and literally breathtaking. <em>Feeling</em> just about every aspect of the body going into a hyper state can feel terrifying. The question became 'How to manage it in different cases?'</li><li>I found a major trigger to be hyper active <em>thinking</em>. One day it just clicked, 'I can feel <em>the speed</em> at which I'm thinking'. Definitely a breathtaking speed. Can also feel the <em>volume</em> of my thoughts (an overwhelming <em>number</em> of challenges). In some cases, it became about slowing things down by getting everything out on paper. It became about creating a list of priorities and scrapping what wasn't a priority <em>or</em> my responsibility, which is something you mention. A constructive 'breakdown' (of factors) typically involves a list which points to the 'lead up'</li><li>In wondering what could help calm the hyperactivity in my body, what came to mind one day was 'Imagine the stress or fear inside you is like black smoke. Your job is to exhaust it, breathing it all out, until it becomes clear'. While such a breathing meditation takes a bit of imagination, what it does to the <em>body</em> is calming. Longer breaths <em>out</em> or <em>exhausting</em> breaths helps calm the nervous system, heart rate, the amount of energy charging up the cells in our body etc etc. Strange to think that the body sighs/vents so as to naturally release energy. Stressed and naturally highly energetic people tend to sigh a lot for good reason</li><li>Began to gain a better sense of feeling when it came to which <em>stimulants</em> in life proved triggering. For example, I've gained a better sense of what <em>feels</em> like a lead up to 'the tipping point' in relation to <em>volume</em> of challenges. Have gained a better sense of what too much caffeine actually <em>feels</em> like. A <em>lack</em> of time management can definitely <em>feel</em> anxiety inducing when not enough time is felt. The list goes on. I challenged myself to become more sensitive so I could get a better <em>sense</em> of what puts me into a state of stress/anxiety/hyperactivity. It's all still a work in progress <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span></li></ul></div>", "date": "29-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-ebb-and-flow/td-p/569017" }, { "author": "user-id/19707", "content": "<p>Hi, the rising. Thankyou for your words.</p><p> </p><p>When manic prior to 2009 I would try to overall \"slow down\", not knowing I had a mental health issue. Observe, assess, consider, change/remain, try out. That was the theme I adopted. Eg watching slow work colleagues that I had personally branded slow, lazy, time drains waiting for the knock off bell. I tried copying their pace, oh that was so hard. I felt I wasnt living or achieving anything. So, a half way point was tried, which ended up a more relaxed version of myself. That point of pace ended up similar to when meds were commenced.</p><p> </p><p>My pop would drive his old Zephyr at 80kph even on the highway. I tried and it drove me nuts. I then trid 95kph and adopted that because it was half way to speeding which ended up stressful, speeding fines and no relaxation to chat.</p><p> </p><p>\"volume of challenges\" is a good description. Nowadays the sheer number of challenges is huge. tasks, chores, computer issues, bank fraud, take the rubbish out, cook, clean etc. My triggers involve the unexpected like the dog needs a VET or the mower breaks down. They are my triggers, because I'm chasing my tail. </p><p> </p><p>I wrote a thread called \"a good nights deep sleep\". It was based on our discarding of sleep as a major factor in our mood. Recently we were in a position to purchase a electric bed and high quality mattress. I cant begin to explain the superb sleep we are getting not only less physical problems when waking but good sound sleep. That leads to less triggers during the day we've noticed.</p><p> </p><p>You list of priorities is interesting and I too wrote down some. One was not allowing others to cause me drama when unwarranted. Last xmas there was drama prior to xmas day. I cancelled the xmas lunch and only had our daughter and her husband over. Only 4 of us and sooo relaxing. So 3 other blood relatives were excluded including my sister. I havent seen her nor spoken to her since and am so much more relaxed. \"Charity begins at home\". We have to reassess constantly to improve our lives and learn to be selfish.</p><p> </p><p>I have to \"stop saving the world\". But if I did I'd lose my character. So that balance is constantly sort after.</p><p> </p><p>TonyWK</p></div>", "date": "29-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-ebb-and-flow/td-p/569017" }, { "author": "user-id/21500", "content": "<p>Hello Tony and the Rising both,</p><p>I really appreciate your accounts of how to recognise and respond to episodes of anxiety. Learning to accept and better manage the reality of anxiety as it shows up in our thoughts, feelings and symptoms continues to be an apprenticeship in self-understanding for me. Renaming anxiety as \"hyperactivity\" is an interesting approach, and one that I think could be really useful. It takes away the value judgement that I find sticks to \"anxiety\" (in my own mind, moreoften) and describes the felt-sense I have when the physical \"alarm\" goes off. If I rephrase my experience as an episode of mental and physical \"hyperactivity\" there seems to be more distance between my core self and this particular experience I am having. When I label my experience as \"anxiety\" I think I feel more responsible for and fused to the experience, as if it is due to my own failing/incompetence that I am in this state. And then the downward spiral can really get going. Language does make a difference.</p><p> </p><p>FYI I haven't been on the forums for a long while, and recognise that today is a day to actively seek support and community for the current episode of anxiousness i'm experiencing. So yes, I am definitely feeling over-activated (and pretty weary), and rue this familiar response to situational triggers. I do believe, however, I'm bringing more acceptance, assertiveness and compassion to the table.</p><p> </p><p>Let's be our own champions, showing bravery, kindness and not a little awkwardness in our complex, valuable and unique lives. (Credit to B Brown for the \"brave, awkward, kind\" motto.)</p><p> </p><p>Annas</p><p> </p><p> </p></div>", "date": "04-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-ebb-and-flow/td-p/569017" }, { "author": "user-id/19707", "content": "<p>Hi Annas1</p><p> </p><p>It's great to read your response. I agree, language makes a difference, \"anxiety\" is now dismissed as a slight nervous condition easily overcome if you just try. It's sad that a serious condition is pigeon holed along with bandaids.</p><p> </p><p>In the thread \"anxiety,  how I eliminated it \" I mentioned it took 22 years to do so. Written many years ago my anxiety is now ebbing and flowing! That proves to me it's never eliminated,  it lurks.</p><p> </p><p>I'm very interested in your \"core\" issues mentioned. If you care to share any deep feeling. There's compassion here for you</p><p> </p><p>TonyWK </p></div>", "date": "04-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-ebb-and-flow/td-p/569017" }, { "author": "user-id/21500", "content": "<p>Hi Tony,</p><p> </p><p>Yes, I find it frustrating sometimes when I disclose my challenge with anxiety and am met with a response such as \"Oh yes, I have anxiety too. It's really common.\" I don't doubt that many people experience anxiety - it is after all a normal human emotion - but clinical anxiety is something more serious and not \"normal\". That said, making a commitment to learning how to manage and push back against anxious feelings is also important, and is one of the tools in the knapsack.</p><p> </p><p>The idea I had in mind about \"core self\" is that I now see the essential, non-changing, valuable part of myself as untouched/unmarked by in-the-moment experiences of anxiety. I guess it's another way of saying that I remind myself to not be defined by anxiety, which is a habit or understanding I used to have. So, to me, there is something more profound and more true about my core or essential self that I want to access when I'm feeling overwhelmed by anxiety. It also helps me not to blame myself for feeling anxious or needing to make adjustments in my life to accommodate my anxiety.</p><p>I feel I've been actively conversing with/managing/listening to my anxiety for about 12 years now. Perhaps there's a few more years to go before I can become comfortable with its presence in my life. Thanks for your words.</p><p> </p><p>Annas</p></div>", "date": "04-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-ebb-and-flow/td-p/569017" }, { "author": "user-id/19707", "content": "<p>Hi Anna</p><p> </p><p>Not being defined by you illness is a major accomplishment. Same as I'm no longer defined by bipolar2, anxiety  depression and dysthymia. They are part of me and without my dysthymia I wouldnt have written the 300 or so poems I've written, nor used them to comfort loved ones as I presented them at eurologies and victims of crime. To quote Stephen Fry \"If I was reincarnated I'd want to be so with my bipolar because without it I wouldnt be me\"</p><p> </p><p>So these illnesses in context become like scars on our limbs, freckles and sore joints. Then they can be utilised to help others as members here do. </p><p> </p><p>Others without mental health issues discount our problems easily.</p><p> </p><p><a href=\"https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/relationship-and-family-issues/they-just-wont-understand-why/td-p/172737\" target=\"_blank\">https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/relationship-and-family-issues/they-just-wont-understand-why/td-...</a></p><p> </p><p><strong>LEGS OF SPOKE</strong></p><p>How can I let them know?</p><p>when to dark exceeds the glow</p><p>when the sun hides behind the clouds</p><p>silence they hear- but I scream so loud.</p><p> </p><p>Some stand beside a 6 foot hole</p><p>shake their heads and see its toll</p><p>they ask how he could have dropped</p><p>out of the circle- a forget me knot</p><p> </p><p>Yet they seem to see clear and there is hope</p><p>when they sight a person with legs of spoke</p><p>A cripple girl pushing her chair</p><p>A man be manic- there's no one there</p><p> </p><p>\"Storm in a tea cup\" hurts so bad</p><p>like the cyber crow who remains so glad</p><p>keeps flying and in full flight</p><p>Carves his craft in the middle of the night</p><p> </p><p>For some in power see it their way</p><p>even at the side of a 6 foot grave</p><p>shake their head and call out \"why\"</p><p>\"Why on earth- he didnt have to die\"</p><p> </p><p>So kind some be- they reach out so true</p><p>smile then say \"we want to meet you\"</p><p>\"bring along your vintage car and your smile</p><p>but leave at home whats behind your dial\"...</p><p> </p><p>So we laugh and dine and all is ok</p><p>leave at home come what may</p><p>if I be saddled with legs of spoke</p><p>they'd lift me around- bloody good bloke</p><p> </p><p>But as my mind hurts so bad</p><p>cannot hide my feelings- mad?</p><p>Cant maintain \"bloody good bloke\"</p><p>Sometimes I wished...I had legs of spoke......</p><p>Tony WK</p></div>", "date": "04-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-ebb-and-flow/td-p/569017" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48075", "content": "<p>well came to Australia 2010 Met Australian Farmer, could not get my qualifications recognised, worked as cleaner for years, run farm two kids raised them Alone, as my husband went working in the city until they where 6 years of age as always little money left , Bought a local tourist park to generate income, right 1 week before covid hit and lockdown with homeschooling kids in addition our neighbour on farm has issues with our once in year escaping livestock (goats)… I am on an emotional roller coaster for a while , not happy in Australia, but feel restrained ….. but the neighbours complaint toppled me over….. feeling cold flushes crying …. In a hole…hopeless . Thanks for listening and get it off my chest . </p></div>", "date": "02-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/not-coping/td-p/569233" }, { "author": "user-id/16277", "content": "<p>Hi Guest_680,</p><p> </p><p>Welcome to the forums and thank you for sharing your post. It sounds like you have been through so much and I completely understand how you could feel hopeless. When our stress bucket is full, all it takes is a something small for it to overflow. Here is more about the stress bucket analogy if you're interested: <a href=\"https://www.pwc.co.uk/who-we-are/purpose/social-mobility/independent-learning-week-6.pdf\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://www.pwc.co.uk/who-we-are/purpose/social-mobility/independent-learning-week-6.pdf</a> </p><p> </p><p>Crying and hot/cold flushes can be common symptoms of anxiety/stress. If you're able I would highly recommend seeking professional help through a GP or psychologist. It is also great that you can come here to get things off your chest and I hope the fact that we are here to listen assists you also.</p><p> </p><p>If you are interested here are some anxiety management techniques available online: <a href=\"https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/anxiety/treatments-for-anxiety/anxiety-management-strategies\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/anxiety/treatments-for-anxiety/anxiety-management-strate...</a> </p><p>And here are some relaxation exercises such as deep breathing available on the website: <a href=\"https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/relaxation-exercises\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/relaxation-exercises</a> </p><p> </p><p>Hope that helps and please keep us updated.</p><p> </p><p>Bob</p></div>", "date": "03-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/not-coping/td-p/569233" }, { "author": "user-id/48080", "content": "I’m sorry to hear you have been feeling this way and struggling with this stress. I cannot even imagine how you have gotten through it all and still able to be a great mother,wife,person. I’m really hoping that you know your feelings and emotions are valid and heard. That you can always reach out for help. Anywhere and no matter how big or small as long as you keep taking baby steps. </div>", "date": "03-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/not-coping/td-p/569233" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/48066", "content": "<p>Hey, Im trying some new approaches to deal with some trauma. Ive tried Art therapy and found it horrible, left me feeling empty, sad and hopeless, felt alone in the room. I generally am pretty positive about the world, just inwardly negative, but look to others around me not so much for support but for clarification (I wonder if thats a part of being a little on the spectrum?).</p><p>Im going to try creative writing next Tuesday and have built it up in my head to be bigger than I want. Im a little bit of a perfectionist but a lazy one so give up easily. Has anyone else tried it and know what its like in reality (not the youtube/google versions), I really want to get something out of it and the feelings Ive had writing a journal seem to be pretty positive. Also I tend to be a pretty keen observer of others (up side to hypervigilance) and feel like I can process the world better when Ive journelled people and what I think is going on - especially with compassion for them. What I really want is to connect with people and just be able to be at peace with the world and bring some peace to others, seeing other people without filters makes me happy, writing could be one way to engage better with the world. I sit here tonight and just want to escape the terror and sadness. Im not an classic extrovert but if Im not around people for a couple of days I go a little off the rails, Im awkward and a little unlikable, will writing help that? I just want to have 20 people in my life I can laugh with, message and share the beauty of the world with, even if their fictional.</p></div>", "date": "01-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-and-creative-writing/td-p/569199" }, { "author": "user-id/16277", "content": "<p>Hi kwilgbob,</p><p> </p><p>What a great post. I currently engage in art therapy but different to you I really enjoy it. I really enjoy expressing myself through art and having something physical and concrete at the end of it. However there are indeed times when I am left feeling empty and/or disappointed.</p><p> </p><p>I have similarly written poetry in an art journal I keep about my emotions, thoughts and values. I have even written poetry about a particular art piece I have done. I think creative writing, similar to journalling, is an amazing outlet and can be very therapeutic. I would highly encourage you pursue this. If you are interested in poetry specifically there is actually a thread on this forum dedicated to poetry written by community members: <a href=\"https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/bb-social-zone/the-poetry-corner-post-your-poems-in-here/td-p/54777\" target=\"_blank\">https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/bb-social-zone/the-poetry-corner-post-your-poems-in-here/td-p/54...</a> </p><p> </p><p>Let us know how you go and if you share any creative writing!</p><p> </p><p>Bob</p></div>", "date": "03-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-and-creative-writing/td-p/569199" } ]

[ { "author": "user-id/47673", "content": "<p>Hi all…so I’m not sure if this happens to anyone else but I keep going through phases where people (literally everyone frustrates me so much). Like I actually cannot deal with people and no matter how hard I try I get so irritated. So I have to either hold my tongue or just isolate myself which then messes with my mental health. I think this happens when I’m stressed or restricted in saying things (have something I want to say) but I really don’t know. Is this just me or does this happen to other people too? It’s very annoying because even my family frustrates me so much for no reason sometimes…although I think this may stem from my younger (and youngest) sibling being the favourite and being babied a lot. <br><br></p><p>Anyway, any thoughts as to what this might be, and does this happen to anyone else? Just want to know that I’m not alone…suggestions for how to deal with this also appreciated. Thank you </p></div>", "date": "01-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/frustrated/td-p/566849" }, { "author": "user-id/16277", "content": "<p>Hi jd03,</p><p> </p><p>Thanks for your post and welcome to the forums. As you may have guessed by coming to this specific thread, being irritable is actually a very common symptom amongst those experiencing mental health issues (esp. depression and anxiety). You are certainly not alone in this. When my depression was at it's worst I would not be able to tolerate anyone (including myself) and the smallest hiccup would send me spiraling. Here is a handy resource to have a check in for your mental health and look at some first steps toward improving it. <a href=\"https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/mental-health-check-in-k10\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/mental-health-check-in-k10</a> <br><br></p><p>Hope this helps and please keep us updated.</p><p> </p><p>Bob</p></div>", "date": "02-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/frustrated/td-p/566849" }, { "author": "user-id/31621", "content": "<p>Hi jd03,</p><p> </p><p>I'm sorry to hear that you're experiencing this. You're not alone in feeling this way. Many of us experience periods of frustration and irritability, particularly when we're stressed or feeling unheard. It's also common to feel like others around us, including family members, are not understanding or acknowledging our feelings, which can further contribute to our irritation.</p><p> </p><p>I think your reasoning makes sense. When you're under a lot of stress, your capacity to handle even minor annoyances can be greatly reduced. This could be why you find yourself getting easily irritated with people. Try to regular self-care practices and see if it could help reduce stress and increase your tolerance for frustration. This could include anything from taking regular breaks, to exercising, to meditating or practicing mindfulness.</p><p> </p><p>You mentioned that you sometimes feel restricted in saying things. This could be causing you to feel unheard and invalidated, leading to irritation. Do you think you can find a safe and appropriate way to express your thoughts and feelings? When you speak it out, it might help alleviate some of your frustration. This could be through talking with a trusted friend, family member, or a professional counselor or therapist. Alternatively, you might find it helpful to write in a journal if you feel comfortable.</p><p> </p><p>And it's possible that your feelings towards your youngest sibling being \"the favorite\" could be adding to your general irritation. Do you think it's possible to find a chance to address these feelings directly with your parents? or with the help of a counselor or therapist, could be helpful.</p><p> </p><p>Persistent feelings of irritability could be a symptom of a mental health condition, such as depression or an anxiety disorder. If it affects your daily life a lot, you need to seek professional support, you can ask your GP to create a plan and refer you to a psychologist.</p><p> </p><p>I think as this moment, taking care of your own mental health is a priority. You might find it beneficial to explain to your family and close friends that you're going through a tough time, and ask for their understanding and support.</p><p> </p><p>Hope everything will be better.<br>Mark</p></div>", "date": "03-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/frustrated/td-p/566849" }, { "author": "user-id/40334", "content": "<p>Hi jd3</p><p> </p><p>Sometimes I think self understanding would have to be one of the greatest challenges in life. Only when graduating through better self understanding does it feel rewarding in some way. Until we feel the rewards, self understanding can feel more like a form of torture <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span></p><p> </p><p>Made a huge difference to me when I was led to see how many facets there can be to us. If you can imagine an old style wagon wheel, there is the overall wheel (who we are as a whole), the hub or our <em>core</em> sense of self and all the spokes or facets that stem from that. So, the question can sometimes be 'Which spoke or facet of myself is in play?'. Being a gal who's come to better understand what I like to call 'the intolerant cow' in me, it's much easier to manage these days. On occasion I actually choose to consciously channel it, as it's a great self esteem booster under certain circumstances. I've come to discover a number of things that trigger the intolerant cow in me to come to life, such as</p><ul><li>becoming exhausted from way too much people pleasing for my own good</li><li>not being listened to when I really <em>need</em> people to listen (if I can feel myself highly stressed or deeply depressed)</li><li>High levels of stress with no one helping me manage challenges (especially when some of those challenges belong to others who <em>should</em> be stepping up in some way but can't be bothered)</li><li>When people would much rather serve themselves rather than make changes that would serve everyone</li><li>Feeling sorry for myself (sorrow for some part of myself that's genuinely suffering)</li><li>Some form of injustice</li></ul><p>and the list goes on. So, lots of triggers. The thing is there are always valid reasons for <em>why</em> the cow in me comes to life. Sometimes it will have a 'take no prisoners' approach towards others and sometimes it will have a calm insisting 'M<em>ooooo</em>ve it and get your act together' attitude. What it tells me, when this part of me comes to life, is that I need to become more conscious of <em>what</em> I'm actually tolerating or trying to tolerate. When I do become more conscious, I typically find myself saying 'I can't believe I put up with that for so long'. You could say it's a natural facet that serves many purposes.</p><p> </p><p>I smile when I say I can <em>feel</em> that cow in me begin to come to life. It announces itself through a sense of anger. So, it's kind of like 'Okay, here it comes. I can <em>feel</em> it coming to life for some reason'. Then I simply observe what comes to mind. Could be 'I'm sick of you not helping me', which translates to 'I'm sick <em>because</em> of you not helping me. I'm feeling sick from the stress of trying to manage everything on my own. I am <em>feeling</em> dis-ease'. You could say our <em>core</em> sense of self is part observer and part <em>manager</em>. If our intolerant sense of self is getting way out of control, may be time to manage channeling the sage in us for a bit of wisdom in this case. May sound a bit like 'Calm down. You need to breathe. Just breathe and <em>do not</em> go burning any bridges right now'.</p></div>", "date": "07-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/frustrated/td-p/566849" }, { "author": "user-id/47673", "content": "<p>Thank you so much for all your support and help guys! I really appreciate it xx.</p><p> </p><p>Since I finished my semester at uni, I thought my mental health would be better (because it normally is). However this time around I find that I am just constantly stressed for some reason and cannot stop overthinking (like my brain is always going at a million miles an hour). I’m not sure why this is, but it is turning me into someone I do not like at all. I know I’m a really kind and caring person at my core, but right now I just cannot tolerate anyone. And I keep saying hurtful little comments that I don’t really mean to be hurtful but I know they are, and I can’t stop doing this even though I know that I’m doing it. It’s making me feel like such a bitch to people and I really want to be a better person again but I just can’t tolerate anyone and I feel so nasty. It’s making me really uncomfortable and ultimately it’s sending me into a spiral where I dislike myself and then I say something and then I overthink what I said and then that makes me more stressed which ultimately makes me say more mean stuff.</p><p> </p><p>I’m sorry for all this…just needed to rant and any more suggestions anyone has will be appreciate greatly. Thank you for your support, truly. Does anyone have any suggested mindfulness stuff? Also I’m not sure talking about my brother and being heard will help because it hasn’t in the past <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":disappointed_face:\">😞</span></p></div>", "date": "29-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/frustrated/td-p/566849" }, { "author": "user-id/31621", "content": "<p>Hi jd03,</p><p> </p><p>I can tell it's very hard for you. Here's some of my experience that I also shared in another post:</p><p> </p><p>Getting outdoors and being active has been incredibly beneficial for my wellbeing. While walking certainly has its own charm, I've found that jogging elevates the experience to another level. The feeling of pushing myself a bit more, the rhythm of my footsteps, and the rush of endorphins, the sensation of breaking a sweat, all contribute to making my mind clearer and my mood more stable. Moreover, I've noticed that my anxiety tends to diminish significantly when I incorporate daily jogging into my routine.</p><p> </p><p>During the weekends, I like to venture a little further into nature, spending time hiking in forests or along the seaside. Immersing myself in these environments, absorbing the beauty of the views, breathing in the fresh air, and listening to the birds, all add an extra layer of tranquility and healing.</p><p> </p><p>Just as Melbourne, my city, is full of such beautiful places to explore, I'm sure your city has its own wonderful spots. I strongly believe that physical activities like jogging or hiking in such settings can make a significant difference.</p><p> </p><p>At the same time, I suggest you to call Beyondblue hotline 1300 224 636, 24/7, to get some professional guidance. Equip yourself with more professional knowledge will help you find the way out.</p><p> </p><p>Hope it helps a bit.</p><p>Mark</p></div>", "date": "30-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/frustrated/td-p/566849" }, { "author": "user-id/40334", "content": "<p>Hi jd03</p><p> </p><p>When all the stresses in life (some obvious and some not so obvious) begin to pile up and those stresses override our calm, caring, understanding and tolerant self, what's left can sometimes appear to be the worst in us. Can be so incredibly tormenting.</p><p> </p><p>What's stressful or anxiety inducing can become exhausting and in a state of exhaustion just about every tiny little thing becomes a trigger, which <em>can</em> cause more stress or anxiety. It's like being stuck in a cortisol induced loop that starts to pick up speed and that's something that can be seriously <em>felt</em>. As everything picks up speed, sometimes a literally <em>breathtaking</em> speed, you can suddenly become more conscious of just how much your breathing may have changed over time. When it all gets bad enough, can make you want to scream 'Would someone help me put the brakes on. Please, give me a break!'.</p><p> </p><p>While I once imagined <em>volume</em> and <em>frequency</em> to be the stuff of <em>sound</em>, I've found they also relate to stress and anxiety. If the <em>volume</em> of challenges is turned up and I'm cycling through them faster and faster at a more <em>frequent</em> rate, it puts me into a state of mental and physical hyperactivity. Even something as simple as dealing with our inner <em>self</em> analyst and inner <em>self</em> persecutor (at the same time) can impact our ability to <em>feel</em> volume and frequency. While once they may have chatted away together (at us) on occasion, without us even realising, now we may be conscious of them chatting <em>constantly</em></p><p>ISP 'What you said was absolutely horrible'</p><p>ISA 'It's not entirely horrible. There's gotta be a reason for it. It's so out of character'</p><p>ISP 'No, it's just straight out unreasonable and unforgivable. No excuses'</p><p>ISA 'There <em>must</em> be a reason. Now, what's the reason? Think, work it out, make sense of it, look for the    reason. Think goddamn it, THINK!'</p><p> </p><p>Sometimes the question can come down to 'How do I reduce volume and frequency?'. I find getting everything out of my head and putting it on paper helps. It's then that I can see the <em>volume</em> of what I'm actually trying to manage. The list may include 'See my friend' or even 'Manage my inner dialogue' and/or 'Manage my breathing'. The next part of the challenge may be about how <em>frequently</em> I need to manage each thing on the list. I may see that friend only <strong>once a week</strong> when I've got plenty of time, as opposed to seeing them 3 times a week under time pressure. I may work on channeling my inner sage <strong>first thing each morning</strong>, so as to strengthen it. I may manage/meditate on regulating my breathing <strong>every time I'm on the toilet</strong> and so on. Now, life starts to look more conscious, more organised and more manageable. Of course, the most important part of any plan is flexibility. I know, all easier said than done <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span></p><p> </p></div>", "date": "30-06-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/frustrated/td-p/566849" }, { "author": "user-id/16277", "content": "<p>Hi jd03,</p><p> </p><p>Thanks for the reply and update. I totally get where you're coming from regarding becoming frustrated with people. It's not because you're a bad person but simply a reflection of what's happening within your life at the moment. You can learn more about this through CBT with a professional also.</p><p> </p><p>Regarding your brother, please only share what you're comfortable in sharing with us.  <span class=\"lia-unicode-emoji\" title=\":slightly_smiling_face:\">🙂</span></p><p> </p><p>In terms of mindfulness there is actually some great information available on beyond blue. Here is a link to some anxiety management techniques: <a href=\"https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/anxiety/treatments-for-anxiety/anxiety-management-strategies\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/anxiety/treatments-for-anxiety/anxiety-management-strate...</a> </p><p>Here is some information on relaxation strategies: <a href=\"https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/relaxation-exercises\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/relaxation-exercises</a> </p><p> </p><p>Hope that helps.</p><p> </p><p>Bob</p></div>", "date": "03-07-2023", "url": "https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/frustrated/td-p/566849" } ]