Q: Why won't this fucking squirrel leave our house? It's spring! Its sleep schedule is all screwed up, and it just gets up whenever to forage for ancient nut piles left by prior squirrels. It's used to us pounding on the walls and yelling at it. It just pauses, then keeps on scrabbling. Inside.
A: have you considered that maybe the squirrel actually owns the house, and is wondering why you are there