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Demonstrate a psychopathic indifference toward other peoples interpretation of your
calm facial posture When they see your expressionlessness and respond with a deadpan look
of their own dont judge their version negatively even if it looks smug Instead act as if you are
glad to see that they are trying to be as calm as you are It is not your responsibility to sink to
the level of the other persons demeanor Instead make it your responsibility to pull them up to
your level
We are already accustomed to receiving disapproving nonverbal feedback from others
when we let our faces relax Many of us had parents who would become outraged if our face
was too calm thinking that we were being flippant sarcastic or obstinate have seen many
children look afraid to appear calm around their parents Kids learn by trial and error to make
pained expressions to defer to parents and teachers This kind of early environmental feedback
makes us feel defensive whenever we sport a calm look
Despite being a decent father in many respects have a friend who is often too dictatorial
with his young daughter To assuage his wrath she squints curls her top lip pouts and pleads
with him in a high voice Daily Her brow wrinkles in a halfcircle from furrowing and raising the
eyebrows at the same time There is no telling how many other internal chakras she strains to
buy mercy
Other parents spoil their children sparing their chakralike modules but causing them to be
undisciplined and disrespectful A good proportion of beautiful and composed people were
spoiled as children Some parents can instill discipline and reverence without traumatizing
and this takes an incredible amount of parenting skill This is the best kind of parent to be
but also the best kind of friend to be
When people see you are stolidly composed they will assume you are likely to mistreat
them When you are kind to them they will be surprised because they assume the only thing
holding most people back from acting abusive is their lack of composure Usually the person
with more composure acts more abusive This is normative and commonly accepted As your
composure improves you may have to fight the urge to take advantage of others You may
have the impulse to be rude scornful or otherwise exploit your privileged position If you are
not a bad person and dear reader am sure you are not as your composure improves you
will become less offensive This is because you will find you have less to act defensive and
oppositional about
The Effect of Tension on the Body During Development
We have discussed how taking on facial and bodily muscle tension is an evolved strategy that
communicates submissiveness to avoid being challenged and attacked There are numerous
similar strategies involving body plan changes even just in primates For example
male orangutans are capable of exhibiting a pronounced developmental hiatus when they
reach the females size What happens next varies Some males go on to develop into full adult
body size along with other mature characteristics such as facial flaps In contrast other males
will enter a prolonged period of physical juvenility arrested growth and development but
otherwise full sexual maturity
Environmental feedback determines whether male orangutans enter this prolonged
juvenile phase or not If their environment stifles their serotonin and testosterone levels they
are more likely to put off full maturity for a few years to avoid competing with the fully mature
Chapter Reprogram Facial Tension
males Fascinatingly suppression of maturity in orangutans is seen even in males that consider
themselves subordinate to a human groundskeeper If the keeper is replaced or the orangutan
successfully challenges the keeper the orangutan will quickly develop its cheek pads and
full size
Male gorillas do not mature into a full silverback for three to eight years after reaching
sexual maturity Some take much longer than others This gives them more time to develop
skills and relationships before they attempt to become an alpha male This phenomenon in
orangutans gorillas and many other animals is called sexual bimaturism It is evident in
humans as well Males hit puberty two years later than girls This is widely thought to delay the
age in which men are thrust into stressful and potentially dangerous competition with older
more dominant sexually active males
A similar process may be going on with our bodies and faces The combination of distress
and repetitive strain may program muscles all over the body to become weak hypotrophic to
display our place in the pecking order In other words the tension keeps us from being as
muscular and healthy as we could be previously thought that most of the variability in beauty
and robust body type was explained by genes thought alpha animals attained their status by a
stroke of genetic luck Now am convinced that much of it comes from environmental
feedback and developmental plasticity Bad social environments influence children to strain
their faces while good ones encourage children to relax them Tension alters our physiognomy
Over months and years some people look depleted and sickly while others look handsome and
brawny Most of us passively allow the environment to determine how this plays out The
Program Peace exercises can help you actively optimize it
Remember from Chapter that muscles that do not rest cannot heal Relaxed muscles are
capable of full recovery and thus are more responsive to exercise Now that your facial muscles
are capable of resting fully they are capable of becoming more muscular
Facial Exercises That Will Make a Relaxed Face Robust
Use the exercises in this section to contract your facial muscles beyond their normal range and
out of partial contraction To do this flex them as hard as you can while breathing
diaphragmatically Some of the muscles are involved in superiority displays others in inferiority
displays but recommend pairing them all with proper breathing to unlink them from the
sympathetic stress system This will make the superiority displays indubitable and the inferiority
displays playful rather than subordinating
Diaphragmatic generalization will reduce the activation threshold for these muscles
encouraging them to contract spontaneously effortlessly and more frequently This will free
up previously frozen contractions and help you become more expressive Exercising these
muscles to the point of fatigue and then letting them rest completely will also help them grow
stronger and more prominent
Facial Exercise Freeing Up the Face
Spend one minute contracting each of the following ten sets of muscles while performing
paced breathing with a breath metronome Hold a firm contraction until the muscles
tremble burn or reach fatigue After they do focus on letting them go completely limp As
PROGRAM PEACE Self Care Exercises to Reprogram Your Mind and Body
the muscles rest resist the tendency to resume bracing After performing these ten exercises
individually feel free to start combining them
Flare your nostrils as wide as you can while keeping the rest of your face relaxed
Many of us are afraid to flare our nostrils because it is a dominance signal It is often
used in other primates as a threat signal Many submissive peoples nostrils are
completely inactive Mine certainly were People with very healthy nostril tone will
unconsciously flare and constrict their nostrils unconsciously as they speak Exercising
them took me from having nearly zero conscious control of them to having full
rhythmic control Building subtle nostril dilation into your facial posture will lend your
face more selfownership Because these muscles extend up into your nose you may
also find that it makes nasal breathing easier
Open your jaw widely and hold it there You might slide it from left to right or move it
in a circular motion This activates the platysma of the neck and many muscles
throughout the jaw Next bring your jaw as far forward underbite and as far back