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"As you wish, my Queen," Loki said by way of acceptance, taking a step closer to Sif. He wanted to strangle her right now, her mere presence fucking with every calculated plan he had. Glancing briefly at the dead bodies of the other Warriors, Loki tried to keep his calm façade. Now they were dead, and Thor was going to... |
"You don't have to do this, Loki," Sif said resolutely as he stopped in front of her form. Her blue eyes were shining, though they held no tears. She was pleading with him, and he felt his heart aching with uncertainty. She was one of his oldest companions, and he had to kill her to appease his mistress and Queen. Hold... |
Placing his hand on Sif's shoulder, Loki squeezed gently. "Close your eyes, Lady Sif," he told her softly before stepping around her kneeling form and placing the dagger to her throat. He could feel her trembling under his palm, the edge of the blade digging into the soft flesh of her neck. |
Lifting his gaze, he found Hela watching him intently. He knew she would say nothing to hasten his task but that she impatiently awaited his obedience, all the same. Drawing back his shoulders, he straightened his back and tightened his grip on the dagger. I am sorry, he thought a split second before he drew the blade ... |
Breathing heavily, Loki dropped his hold on her shoulder and stepped backward as her body toppled forward. He could hear her gasping for breath, the gurgling grating on his nerves. Emerald eyes continued to stare at Hela, unable to watch The Goddess of War bleed out before him. Hela nodded once, a satisfied smile graci... |
Swallowing thickly, he felt peace when Sif finally quieted, her death just one more on the long list he'd acquired in his long life. Dropping the dagger at his feet, he bowed his head to his Queen and then promptly turned and left the throne room. He didn't return to his chambers, instead making haste for his mother's ... |
Outside, he hurried to the bench where he and Thor had sat and spoke of bonds and brotherly love not so long ago. Dropping to his knees, Loki placed both hands on the cool, flat surface and tried his very best not to lose it entirely. Gasping for breath, he ached to feel something, anything, but there was nothing. Loki... |
As that realization set in, Loki noticed his hands were stained with Sif's blood, but he had not the energy to banish the crimson horror away. Instead, he remained kneeling in Frigga's garden, contemplating the fact that he was no longer who he thought he was. If he continued on this path, even with all of the scheming... |
Yawning, Hermione tried to wake up despite being thoroughly exhausted. Her lack of sleep on top of everything else was really starting to wear on her and making it difficult to function. Reaching for her thermos full of coffee, she was really unhappy when there was a knock at her office door. Pursing her lips, she held... |
"Come in," she called out before taking a sip of the scalding coffee. She smiled seeing Harry open the door, her friend a welcome face after all the meetings she'd sat through the day before. "Morning," she greeted as he came in and shut the door behind him. She pointed to the open chair across from her. "Have a seat. ... |
"No," Harry replied, shaking his head. "I've had enough coffee this morning to keep me awake for a week probably." He laughed, but the smile didn't quite reach his eyes. Taking in Hermione's appearance, he noted the bags under her eyes and the slight tremor in the hand she held her thermos with. "Are you okay? You look... |
"Just tired," she admitted, setting aside her coffee and beginning to organize the papers on her desk. She had a few meetings later that morning and wanted to have everything in order. "Gwyneira didn't sleep well last night which means I didn't sleep well last night, or at all really." She sighed but smiled, nonetheles... |
"She's still not sleeping through the night?" Harry asked, frowning with concern. |
"Not really, no." Hermione stopped shuffling papers to meet Harry's stare. "Why? Should she be?" |
He shrugged one shoulder. "I can't remember since it's been so long since Lily was a baby, but I feel like it didn't take long to get her on a set sleep schedule." |
"She is half Jotunn, if that makes a difference. Maybe they sleep differently." Tugging at her lip nervously with her teeth, Hermione tried not to worry that something might be a little off or wrong with her daughter. She had enough on her plate as it was with her work at the Ministry. |
"Yeah, that could be it," her friend said, but there was still a hint of doubt lacing his words that set Hermione on edge. |
Picking her coffee back up, she tried to smile at her friend before taking another sip. "So, what brings you to my office so early this morning?" she inquired, hoping it was about Pansy's baby shower plans and not work related. When Harry tensed, she knew it was the latter and she immediately went on alert. |
"I know you're tired and probably really busy today, but I wanted to talk to you about dissolving the Isolation Act," Harry said softly, figuring it was best to be honest right now. There was no point beating around the pitch, as it were. Hermione would know if he was lying anyway. |
"I'm sorry," she began, setting her thermos down with a little more force than necessary. Hoping she'd heard Harry wrong, she clenched her fists in her lap and leaned forward. "Did you say dissolve the Isolation Act?" |
"Yeah," Harry nodded, his voice quiet. He scratched at the back of his head, still not meeting her gaze. "I did. I think it's a thing we need to discuss, honestly." |
"And why would I dissolve the act? We just put it into full effect." It was true, after the emergency meeting with all the department heads and seconds, it had taken nearly two weeks to fully establish the boundaries and procedures for isolating their magical community from the Muggles. She'd stepped on a lot of toes a... |
"Hermione," Harry said firmly, finally meeting her gaze. "You know as well as I do that we can't keep hiding ourselves away. Don't you miss Jane and Darcy?" |
Straightening her shoulders and fixing Harry with a pointed glare, she snapped, "Of course I miss my friends, but that doesn't mean we should open ourselves up to the dangers that are out there." |
Sighing, Harry tried again. "Don't you feel like you're losing people's favor by doing this, though? We lost the head of the Magical Accidents and Catastrophes Department just yesterday and the Prophet is having a field day." Shaking his head, Harry met her furious stare. "It's only going to get worse if we don't do so... |
"I couldn't care less about what people think so long as they are safe," Hermione said without emotion, almost as if she'd repeated herself a million times. And maybe she had. Harry may have been the first to try and talk her out of this plan, but he wasn't the last either. "And it won't be forever," she added, idly pi... |
Harry hated seeing his best friend like this, so torn and lost. She may think she had everything together, but something was desperately wrong under the surface and she refused to face up to it. Knowing full well that he might be about to lose one of his oldest friends, Harry swallowed back his own fears and pushed for... |
"I think that you can be so much more for us as Minister than this, Hermione," Harry told her earnestly, placing both hands flat on the surface of the desk in front of him. He did it so she wouldn't see them trembling, a part of him slightly afraid of what she'd become over the past few months. "You broke down all thos... |
"I'm well aware of what I've accomplished in the past, Harry, and exactly how and why I was able to do so." Hermione could feel her blood beginning to boil, magic surging through her veins and wanting to come out and play. She clenched her fists, refusing to lose control of herself right now. Not in front of Harry. Not... |
"I'm not saying anything bad about your past, Hermione," Harry said, trying to talk her down now that he could see her teetering on the edge of something dark. Her eyes were bright and he could almost feel her magic permeating the air. In essence, he was scared. "I just worry about you and... I just worry." |
"There's nothing to worry about," she told him, relaxing her hands and rubbing the sweaty palms on her robes. "I've overcome obstacles in the past, and this is just another one for me to deal with." |
"If you look at this as an obstacle, then maybe this isn't for you; being Minister, I mean. Maybe...you should step down." He knew it wasn't a good idea or what she wanted to hear, but he had to try something. She was spiralling out of control and he needed to make her see she was doing more harm than good for their Wi... |
Laughing in disbelief, Hermione merely reclined in her chair and shook her head. "Really, Harry? Who was it that pushed me toward this position? And don't say Kingsley because we all know it was you," she began, voice cold and calculating. "He wanted you, but you were unwilling to step down as Head Auror. Which is fine... |
"No! You're going to listen to me!" Hermione jumped to her feet, her outburst causing her magic to fluctuate and the teacups on the shelves behind her to rattle in their saucers. Coming around the side of her desk, she began to pace, breathing heavy as she tried to keep her anger in check. "I didn't want this, not yet ... |
"You can still do that," Harry tried, sitting up straighter in the chair and keeping an eye on his friend. "You don't have to look at this as a bad thing, but you need to make some changes now or things are going to go horribly wrong." |
"I don't look at this as a bad thing. I'm simply embracing my situation." She stopped, turning to Harry with a frown on her face. "And what do you mean by horribly wrong?" |
"The people might revolt, Hermione," he replied, honestly. Sighing heavily, he raked a hand through his dark hair and wondered why he ever let her talk him into the Isolation Act in the first place. "I've been hearing a lot of talk. The community is unhappy being cut off from the Muggle world. They miss their friends a... |
"If they break the law, then they will be punished accordingly," she stated plainly, as if this was abundantly clear all along. "You and the MLE are in charge of that, are you not?" |
"We are, but that's not the point," Harry started, but she cut him off again. |
"Then what is the point, Harry, because I have another busy day and I'd like to get started." Placing her hands on her hips, she quirked an eyebrow and waited for Harry to reply. |
Heart sinking, Harry got up from where he was seated and walked toward the door, already knowing that he was fighting a losing battle. He watched as Hermione moved back toward her desk, her demeanor already showing she knew he had nothing to say that would change her mind. This entire situation made him sad, seeing his... |
"You just can't do this... The people are suffering." |
"I suffered for well over a decade!" She screeched, grabbing at her hair in frustration and causing Harry to flinch. "I fought with my PTSD and depression, my heartache and loss, and yet here I am! You helped me to get here, Harry, and I intend to stay. If you have a problem with how I'm running the Ministry, feel free... |
Taking a deep breath, she slowly exhaled as she sat back down in her chair. Harry was staring at her with wide, shocked eyes from behind his black frames and she didn't know how to feel about that. As she settled in her seat, she saw him take his own deep breath and then he shook his head. Still, she said nothing furth... |
"I'm sorry, Minister," he began, realizing his place and knowing that his best friend was not there any longer. "I've overstepped. I'll leave you to your business." He turned to go, but Hermione had one last thing to say. |
"I'm done wallowing in my pain, Potter. You taught me that it was unhealthy to do that, growing from the ashes of your own past to become the brilliant wizard that stands before me today." She used his surname rather than first since he'd called her by her title. "I believe in my actions and I will no longer allow the ... |
Harry nodded, averting his eyes and then left the office. The door shut quietly behind him and Hermione felt her stomach lurch knowing that something in their friendship had just shifted. Only, she didn't know what that was and there was something else too. She knew she should feel sad or hurt by what had just transpir... |
Loki woke early, the room still dark. Taking a shuddering breath, he threw back the covers on the bed and swung his legs over the side. Pale feet met the cold marble of the flooring, one hand on the mattress steadying him as he rose to stand. Hela was absent, as usual, having had her fill of him hours ago and leaving h... |
He dressed swiftly, not sure if he would be left alone for long. Once he was clothed, Loki exited the royal bedchamber and began the trek to his old rooms. He knew not why he felt so compelled to visit them after all this time, only that he knew he had to go. He saw no one on his journey, giving him no reason to come u... |
Arriving before his old doors, he wasted no time, raising his hand and opening them with his magic. He swept into the room, stopping just past the threshold to stare around. It was exactly as he had left it, and yet, it was entirely different now. No longer did it hold the comfort and contentedness it once had and he f... |
"Loki." - "Lady Granger, I was not expecting you. To what do I owe this...pleasure?" - "You activated the wards." - "You could feel that?" |
"Loki, you're going to set off the wards." - "Then move closer." - "What is this? What do you want from me?" - "Again, Lady Granger, you ask the wrong questions." |
"What have you done?!" - "It is safe to assume you have finally discovered the true properties of the Rime Diamonds." - "You lied to me...I trusted you." - "God of Mischief and Lies, Lady Granger. That was a foolish mistake to make." |
"I didn't think you were coming." - "To be honest, I wasn't exactly sure either. I had to come, though, to repair the wards." - "Have at it then." |
"There's a darkness within you, and it's calling out to me—to the darkness that dwells deep within my soul. Even while you stand outside my doors trying to coerce yourself to flee, I can sense you, under my skin, in my very being. There's nothing either of us can do to eliminate this darkness—it is a crucial part of ou... |
"I await your instruction, Mistress." - "Yes, my love. You may have your release." |
"I promise, if you return unto me, that I will protect and cherish you, until the last of my breath leaves my cold body." - "I accept your promise, Loki." |
"Do you feel that? I think it's working." - "Let go now, my love. Take it all in-take it all." - "Loki!" |
"I look like a monster." - "No, Loki, I-I think you're beautiful." |
Dropping to his knees as the memories faded, Loki bowed his head. All along the darkness had been there inside of him, and now it was back like an old friend. It consumed him, taking what little light remained. Even now, with the memories of his time spent with Hermione in these very chambers swirling around his mind, ... |
Looking back on everything, he should have seen this coming. So easily he allowed the darkness back into his heart, accepting Hela's rule and going along with her every whim. Even the most carefully constructed of plans had a weak spot. He was that weak spot, the one who would ruin it all. With eight of the nine realms... |
But his Star Magic was fading, his magical core barely hanging on as he struggled to make it through the days and the even darker nights. Loki was beginning to wonder if he would survive this war, if he would even get to enjoy knowing that he'd helped to conquer all nine of the realms. All his life he had desired nothi... |
War. Chaos. Death. Destruction. Hela. |
He cringed, not even trying to hide his disappointment at being caught here. Planting his palm against the cold flooring, Loki pushed himself to stand. Turning around slowly, he met the calculating stare of his Queen and Mistress. Bowing his head, he acknowledged her presence. "Hela," he spoke softly, hating that her n... |
"Come," she demanded and then turned and left the doorway empty. |
He knew not what to expect, only that it would not be good. Pushing aside any lingering regret and remorse, Loki didn't even spare his bedchambers another glance as he followed Hela from the room. The doors slammed shut behind him, the sound tearing through his heart as he knew he would probably never step foot there a... |
He was the God of Chaos, of Mischief and Lies, and he would do well to remember that. There was no time to dwell on the past. Doing so only caused one to be weak, and he was already halfway there without giving Hela reason to strike him down. Loki and the darkness were old friends, and so he let the past go and the dar... |
"Come on, Eira," Hermione begged her daughter, holding her snug against her chest as she bounced lightly. "You have to sleep. You haven't slept a full night in weeks. You must be exhausted..." |
Hermione hadn't slept a full night either and it was truly starting to wear on her. She felt tears spring to her eyes as Gwyneira continued to whine and fight off the sleep she so desperately needed. She may be able to stave off her heartache and pain, but with little to no sleep, Hermione was running on fumes. If this... |
Glancing around the nursery, Hermione tried to find something that might help her get Eira to sleep, even though she knew she was on her own. It was nearly midnight and if she didn't get some rest, she'd never make it through tomorrow. She was openly crying now, which only seemed to irritate her sensitive daughter even... |
Finally deciding the bouncing was not helping, Hermione stopped and closed her eyes. She reached deep into her magical core where she knew there was still some remaining Star Magic stored. It wasn't much because she'd used most of it up doing just this trick over the past two months, but it would be enough. Pulling for... |
The Star Magic, obtained by the last time she and Loki were together, always brought peace to their daughter. It was almost as if it was tricking her into believing they were both there with her, calm and in love once more. That was incredibly far from the truth, though. Loki was still off conquering realms and she was... |
As Gwyneira slowly eased into sleep, Hermione felt her own body waver. Merlin, she was so weak these days, almost to the point where it was difficult to rise in the morning. Nevertheless, she pushed through and as soon as her daughter had slipped to sleep entirely, she gently placed her in the crib. With a sigh of reli... |
Now, she could sleep as well, and she made her way to the bedroom quickly. Falling onto the bed face first, she was thankful that she'd changed into her sleep clothes hours ago. If only she'd been able to fall asleep then because at this point, she was only going to get maybe four or five hours before it was time to ge... |
Sleep never came easy anyway... Normally, Hermione would just pass out in exhaustion for a few hours before either Gwyneira or the alarm woke her up screaming. Most nights, like apparently tonight, she would lay here, wide awake, wondering what this feeling inside of her was. It was dark and frightening, and worried he... |
Rolling over onto her back, Hermione stared at the ceiling and wondered why she could find no peace. As she did so, memories of the past began to flood her mind. During the day she tried so damn hard to keep these thoughts at bay, but when night crept in, so did the insecurities. The memories were mere flickers of conv... |
"You know; you can move around a bit more. I've put wards around the flat so you can't go anywhere." - "I'm aware." |
"What are you doing, Hermione?" - "Trying to take this insipid thing off!" - "You don't have to do that." |
"You shouldn't have to sacrifice your future so that others will believe in me." - "You're mad because I put my faith in you?" - "I'm not someone people typically trust, Hermione." |
"I am, and always will be, a-a monster." - "Stop saying that! You are not a monster. I lo-I don't believe it for one second. People change. I can help you, don't you understand?" |
"What is your safe word?" |
"I'm frightened." - "Of me?" - "What? No-Never of you, Loki." - "You should be." - "You promised you would never hurt me." |
"You're in my heart, Loki. I love you." - "No... that's-it's just the diamonds making you think that-" - "Stop. Just stop, Loki." |
"Everyone is capable of being loved, no matter who they are or what they've done in the past." - "What about events that have not yet to come to pass? I can make no promise that I will always be able to resist the darkness-the monster within." - "I have faith in you, Loki...to do the right thing." |
"I don't deserve your love, Hermione." - "I'm exactly what you deserve." |
With a strangled sob, Hermione realized that despite knowing she had fallen into this dark pit of despair, she still felt absolutely nothing. She should miss Loki and the love he made her feel, the safety he'd provided for such a short time, but she did not. Instead, she felt nothing but dread and a desperation to be f... |
Oh how she wanted to feel... To miss Loki, to want him back. Only she didn't and that made her cry ever harder. She'd once told him she wasn't frightened of him, but now she wasn't sure if that was quite true. In fact, with every passing day as she grew more cut off and the feeling of darkness pulled her further and fu... |
Panting on his hands and knees, Loki could feel the sweat dripping from his bruised and battered body. He was spent, physically and mentally; Hela having had her way with him for well over forty-eight hours. Dehydration and sleep deprivation were wreaking havoc on his mind, and he squeezed his eyes shut as a wave of na... |
Hela sat on the edge of the bed, just as naked as he was. She was watching him with a sly smirk, seemingly satisfied with herself. Out of the corner of his eye, Loki watched as she rose elegantly and made her way to the bathing chamber where he heard the water begin to fill the large tub. Honestly, Loki had lost count ... |
The thought of her hands on his skin for one more second literally made him ill. Struggling to his feet, Loki nearly stumbled into the bedside table. Bony hands gripped the edge just in time, bracing himself so that he didn't topple back to the floor. After falling from the bed earlier, he wasn't sure he could survive ... |
Inside the bathing chamber, he heard the water draining and realized that he'd been standing here for far longer than he thought. Where was his mind? What had this witch done to him? At a loss, Loki set the glass back down and turned around to await Hela's imminent return. Everything seemed to be unraveling, and he cou... |
Wetting his chapped lips, Loki took a few hesitant steps toward Hela. "We need to talk," he croaked, his voice cracking with disuse. |
"About what, my pet?" Hela simpered, placing her hands on her hips and canting her head in apparent confusion. "Everything is going according to plan." |
"I realize that you were displeased to find me in my old chambers, but forcing yourself upon me these last two days was more than enough punishment," Loki began, taking another tentative step toward Hela. "I believe it's time you start including me in your thoughts for our conquest of Midgard." |
"Oh, you think so?" |
Loki didn't like the look she was giving him, her eyes colder than the ice barren land of Jotunheim. Sighing, Loki raked both hands through his sweat-dampened hair in frustration. This was not going the way he'd hoped. "Hela, my Queen; you and I came into this together, and I would like to be kept abreast of our plans ... |
Hela scoffed, moving forward a few paces and taking in Loki's frail form. "You only want to know the plan so you can figure out what I plan to do about your adopted brother and Midgardian friends..." |
"That is not my intention-" |
"Do not lie. I know you worry about that that human-bred witch," she sneered. |
Anger flared within Loki's chest, the insult he'd once called Hermione breaking through his addled mind. "Leave her out of it," he seethed, hands clenched into fists so hard his nails dug into his palms. "She has nothing to do with why I want to be involved." |
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