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shook her head, Hold still, he said,
|
his hands surfeit with the curl
|
and softness of her hair.
|
Three weeks after her death,
|
a stranger entered the salon
|
and settled in the chair.
|
She had the color and shape
|
of his mother’s hair,
|
and when he sunk his hands in it,
|
the texture, even cowlicks,
|
individual as freckles—same.
|
Twice he had to leave the room,
|
and twice, he returned—still,
|
when he touched her hair, it blurred.Hold still, he said, hold still.
|
Nevermind that keeping ashes
|
on the mantel feels ghoulish,
|
and comically impractical:
|
through no will of their own
|
to a moving box
|
I haven’t unpacked and likely won’t.
|
One among the shifting mass
|
of humanity intent
|
on countless destinations,
|
one hungry stomach
|
and dry mouth among many,
|
one brain dazed
|
by the speed and altitude
|
of flights unnatural
|
to any animal, by herding,
|
followed by waiting
|
succeeded by rushing,
|
waiting, herding—
|
and more flight
|
incomprehensible
|
to any body contained
|
in this seemingly unwieldy
|
mass of metal lifting
|
improbably over Chicago,
|
where a misty orange aura
|
hovers over the city’s
|
brighter lights, as if
|
its soul sought ascension
|
it could only attempt,
|
as if the aura
|
might break free
|
and follow us,
|
wherever we might fly,
|
wheresoever we may rest—
|
one with the multitude
|
of humans en route
|
through mystery,
|
to mystery.
|
I wanted to give you something for your pain.
|
But not the drug du jour
|
or the kind word this side of cliché.
|
Something you wouldn’t find on a talk show,
|
in a department store or dark alleyway.
|
I wanted to give you something for your pain
|
but I couldn’t imagine what.
|
Frankincense, myrrh—even gold
|
seemed too plain (too plain and too gross).
|
I needed something that wouldn’t have occurred
|
to you or me, or even Nature: a creature
|
more fabulous, more imaginary
|
than you’d find in a rain forest or tapestry
|
or pixel-loaded screen. Some exotic anodyne
|
an alchemist or astrophysicist
|
would be envious of: a chemical reaction,
|
an astral refraction, an out-of-body,
|
out-of-mind, one-of-a-kind
|
transport from your pain, that would last
|
longer than a day, go deeper than the past.
|
I would have founded a whole new religion
|
if I thought that would suffice.
|
As for love—sacred, profane, or both—
|
I wanted to give you something
|
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