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So then this means nothing to you. [rips picture]
Kelly
false
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6
Yeah, yeah.
Ryan
false
21,593
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Mike.
Darryl
false
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9
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No, impish or admirable.
Dwight
false
54,486
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7
8
He���s in the bathroom.
Erin
false
37,908
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23
7
Are we talking about your grandchildren?
Lawyer
false
27,201
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I am a theatrical person. Growing up, I always thought I would become an actor. Because I have, these memorization tricks that I use. Um, for instance, I learned the Pledge of Allegiance by setting it to the tune of Old MacDonald. [starts singing] I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the republic for which it stands, one nation under God. With a woof-woof here, and a woof-woof there. Here a woof, there a woof. Everywhere a woof, woof. Um, you get it.
Michael
false
20,412
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40
So, where did you learn how to play?
Jim
false
58,339
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20
20
Are you in that paper documentary too?
Carla Fern
false
58,329
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20
13
Nellie, this is a competition. Please take it seriously.
Erin
false
59,567
9
23
37
No, we haven���t ordered anything. No one���s even taken our drinks. Uh, what is the chef special? [music plays and stripper starts dancing on Dwight]
Dwight
false
46,841
8
4
45
Yeah! I'm too hot anyway.
Ryan
false
11,365
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7
36
Ah, god. Okay. You know what everybody? I'm sure there is a better way to do this but I've drive something like 400 miles today and I'm completely exhausted so I'm just gonna tell you. Your branch is not closing; Stamford is closing. Um, for the time being, it seems that all your jobs are safe.
Jan
false
50,156
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15
22
Don't remember me like this. Remember me as the man who pulled down the screen.
Dwight
false
30,706
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32
Damn it, Michael, I told you that in confidence. Now I have to go over and deal with these employees and their families. A little boy just walked up to me and said, 'is my daddy gonna have a job by Christmas?'
David
false
23,517
5
3
10
[banging on the glass] Hey, hey. What are you doing? Don't talk to them.
Michael
false
1,949
1
6
40
Just the once.
Toby
true
38,095
6
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29
Wow. That is crazy.
Kevin
false
25,243
5
7
36
They tried to keep us apart, but they couldnt. It was like destiny.
Kelly
false
18,952
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4
42
You okay?
Jim
false
49,586
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30
All right.
Creed
false
45,244
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24
8
You could just be saying it to get the job.
Jim
false
49,396
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13
7
Mine was actually a pretty boring case, so-
Jim
false
34,398
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12
3
We didn't, because we think it'd be better to do it together.
Jim
false
43,606
7
18
7
500
Michael
false
19,347
4
5
9
Yeah, I know.
Michael
false
20,946
4
10
31
[nervously stuttering] I... have... things...
Kevin
false
31,174
6
2
5
A guy on my street fell off a ladder painting his house. It was on the news.
Toby
false
49,803
8
14
10
Kathy.
Dwight
false
33,657
6
9
11
We have a monthly staff meeting
Michael
false
47,990
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8
24
Well, you know how in the vending machine they have the chocolate chip cookies in the A-1 spot? They do that 'cause they think A-1's the best spot for the best cookie. But the real best spot is D-4. Right? That's where the eyes go. So...
Kevin
false
20,645
4
9
14
Oh well don't tell me that he's really changed since you guys dated.
Jan
false
31,963
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4
36
You're welcome.
Michael
false
47,916
8
8
16
All right! We're here. Limitless can wait.
Andy
false
55,784
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11
20
Yes, as a matter of fact, I uh��� [pulls booklets from his bag] I wrote some down. There you go. [passes out booklets] Wow, this guy came prepared, it impresses me! [group laughs]
Darryl
false
25,920
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10
17
Oh, so glad I could help.
Dwight
false
26,763
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13
3
No.
Dwight
false
33,646
6
9
8
It smells like throw up in here.
Kevin
false
28,636
5
19
29
Okay. So yeah.
Dwight
false
37,531
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21
49
Ooh.
Kevin
false
41,298
7
10
30
Don't... I...
Michael
false
25,301
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8
6
[pours something from the fridge into a bowl and opens the microwave, it is covered in exploded food] Oh, come on! [to the documentary crew] Do you see this? Disgusting.
Pam
false
30,276
5
25
14
Ok. I love it. I love it.
Michael
false
45,421
7
24
44
Let me get that for you. [runs ahead to open the door for Jim]
Dwight
false
5,557
2
10
53
[rapping] What's up my nerds. Check it out. [points at the mistletoe stuck down his pants]
Todd Packer
false
40,365
7
7
44
And Cinco de Mayo.
Michael
false
41,032
7
10
2
Dwight said this entry was a waste of space.
Hank
false
41,069
7
10
8
Well then you're not going to talk to the new building owner. Which is a shame, because I hear he's a very reasonable guy.
Dwight
false
20,668
4
9
16
Whatever I want? It's never whatever I want. When I wanted to see Stomp, and you wanted to see Wicked, what did we see?
Michael
false
11,169
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6
49
Hi, I'm Carol.
Carol
false
54,340
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6
34
I thought it was gonna be tiny. Oh my gosh it's beautiful. So this is how your family came to America.
Erin
false
30,927
6
1
18
She always eats my lunch.
Erin
false
39,317
7
4
21
You wanna dig into our relationship, go over it, see what killed it. Ok, I'm in.
Jan
false
34,142
6
11
5
I want to keep those so I can see what I sent.
Michael
false
18,472
4
3
46
[sighs, walks back into office]
Michael
false
12,856
3
11
12
He's in the office.
Roy
false
19,497
4
5
38
[Chariots of Fire theme plays] It all starts with an idea. But you can never tell where an idea will end up. [people passing a Corporate Memo around to each other] Because ideas spread, they change, grow. They connect us with the world. [Kelly catches paper airplane that says 'I love you'] And in a fast moving world, where good news moves at the speed of time [newspaper with Andy saying 'Hometown Boy Wins Race'], and bad news isn't always what it seems. [Dwight hands Phyllis paper that says 'You have a son, and it's me'] Because when push comes to shove we all deserve a second chance. [Stanley finds paper that says 'Turn your life around. Now hiring at Dunder Mifflin'] To score. [Jim throws paper in basket, Michael retrieves it; it says 'World's Most Creative Boss'] Dunder Mifflin. Limitless paper in a paperless world.
Michael's Ad
false
12,371
3
10
16
No, orange is whorish.
Angela
false
26,999
5
13
53
I know where this is goin'.
Michael
false
56,035
9
12
34
That is correct. Come on, guys, where is this even coming from?
Pete
false
35,667
6
16
29
Wait, wait. My iPod's not in here!
Pam
false
43,553
7
17
27
Sorry?
Michael
false
29,091
5
21
16
When did you need that rundown by?
Jim
false
21,040
4
10
45
Yeah, what are you doing here?
Kelly
false
50,940
8
18
18
Thank you.
Jim
false
1,475
1
5
35
[to Jim] Look at Larry Bird. Larry Legend.
Roy
false
31,139
6
2
2
It's okay with me but he's gonna want me in there.
Michael
false
4,788
2
8
39
Yeah, magnificent worker, marvelous worker, more money for this worker. Man, I like this worker. Mighty worker. That's good. That's good.
Dwight
true
51,529
8
20
15
If it would help you to forget, I could hit you in the brain stem with this candlestick.
Dwight
false
17,436
4
1
73
What do you want me to do Jim?
Michael
false
13,923
3
15
33
Who?
Uncle Al
false
55,673
9
11
12
It was his birthday, just turned three. So���
Dwight
false
44,406
7
21
5
I'm your boss!
Gabe
false
51,730
8
21
11
...and then just lay him in his crib, and then bicycle his legs. And then after Jim quiets down, you do the same thing with your baby. [Pam, Jim and Kelly laugh] But if he keeps having problems, just give me a call.
Ravi
false
20,865
4
10
17
Well, look, I am in an assigned parking place in front, so... Alright, alright, alright, umm let me try to think about what it would be like to not have one. [thinks] OK, yes that would be bad.
Michael
false
32,400
6
5
17
Hello Mr. Halpert. I'm calling from the identity theft department at Capital One. We've detected some unusual activity on your credit card.
Credit card rep
false
16,924
3
23
76
Well, I wish you would.
Pam
false
20,271
4
8
23
Excuse me?
Lester
false
6,456
2
13
9
I'll just be sleep--- [Michael hangs up the phone before Oscar can finish]
Oscar
false
11,742
3
8
44
It's just my crazy nose. I'm... uh, used to different smells.
Karen
false
9,663
3
2
1
Yeah?
Pam
false
30,177
5
24
34
For real, you're not kidding?
Pam
false
45,664
7
24
69
Hey! Hey! Hey!
Jim
false
17,048
4
1
17
People keep calling me a 'Wunderkind'; I don't even know what that means. I mean, I know what it means, it means very successful for your age, so I guess it makes sense, but... it's a weird word.
Ryan
false
25,097
5
7
23
Mmm-hmmm...
Concierge Marie
false
42,692
7
14
13
Pam, I'm obviously going to get that stuff for you so just shut up.
Dwight
false
45,327
7
24
25
What makes you feel qualified to judge a place after a mere interview? [Robert stares at Dwight] What are you doing..? [Dwight sits up abruptly] Stop trying to figure me out.
Dwight
false
4,555
2
8
11
Oh, yea!
Pam
false
31,650
6
3
26
Yeah, I would, too.
Phyllis
false
16,790
3
23
62
Very good! You have earned one Schrute Buck.
Dwight
false
9,607
3
1
43
You sound pretty defensive Michael.
Oscar
false
46,795
8
4
40
Well, how about one of our classic father/son duets? [starts playing guitar]
Andy
false
35,631
6
16
23
Good luck!
Phyllis
false
8,832
2
21
12
Yes. Thank you, Pam. How about Angela makes the poster into a t-shirt, which Oscar wears. That way, he can never see it and whenever she looks at Oscar, she can see it. Win/win/win.
Michael
false
42,284
7
13
6
No. What? You can't do that. You are a critical part of this seminar. You're the charming warm-up guy,
Andy
false
33,919
6
10
22
Seems like it's leaning one way.
Ryan
false
4,514
2
8
4
Oh, no.
Pam
false
59,348
9
22
68
Why?
Angela
false
25,903
5
10
13
I wish that you'd stop rubbing that lamp in that creepy way.
Pam
false
1,872
1
6
33
What are you doing?
Jim
false