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she glances at the clock , which reads 12:15 a.m.[SEP]and guess what ?
and i know the fear is there , the fear that i 'm already attached and that i know he 's going , and so am i.[SEP]i feel us .
some studio in l.a.[SEP]i 'd imagine .
i stop in manhattan on the way back to l.a.[SEP]from tokyo , and spend two days looking for her .
finally , i go home to l.a.[SEP]and begin the long , painful process of trying to forget her .
sit in some mansion in l.a.[SEP]waiting for him to get back from filming ?
i flew back to l.a.[SEP]early , did n't tell her .
come on back , dr.[SEP]guzman will see you now .
which means i 'm heading back to l.a.[SEP]at some point .
come back to l.a.[SEP]go to the premiere of fulcrum with me .
when i said i was going back to l.a.[SEP]what did you think i was saying ?
so you 'll come to l.a.[SEP]for the summer ?
chapter 15 i thought maybe we 'd go to his house after we landed in l.a.[SEP]or maybe to a hotel , or something .
babe , this is l.a.[SEP]traffic will slow me down at some point .
we do n't head into downtown l.a.[SEP]but up into the hills surrounding it .
it 's like a scene from every movie ever set in l.a.[SEP]immediately familiar even though i 've never been here .
but we do leave , sometime close to ten p.m.[SEP]and adam is quiet on the drive into downtown l.a .
months of traveling between detroit , l.a.[SEP]and two different shoots in different parts of the globe .
we land on st.[SEP]john , transfer our one suitcase to a jeep , and sit in easy silence as the driver takes us from the airport to the marina , where a twin-engine float plane waits .
we 've got my place in l.a.[SEP]where else would you want to live ?
i 'll have to fly back to l.a.[SEP]for filming , and i 'll have shoots in other places-that 's not going to change .
go book a slot on dr.[SEP]phil if you want to untangle your mess .
and there was that scene with the sex swing ... .[SEP]where was she hiding this crazy , uninhibited side of her ?
it 's something you say to stop us if- the giggle bubbled up inside her as someone-mike ?[SEP]adjusted the scarf .
following his gaze , which looked ... guilty ?[SEP]she turned toward the doorway , where she found mike towering over them , two steps in the cheerful room , his face anything but .
someone 's been watching dr.[SEP]phil , mike replied , as if impressed .
bunny slope today , chuck e.[SEP]cheese climbing structure tomorrow .
madge was n't always at jeddy 's these days , and if mr.[SEP]hottie hot chef dude was her replacement , then he was a fine upgrade on the eyes over the crotchety old institution .
looking at the clock i saw it was already 9:30 p.m.[SEP]and we had been planning to leave around 10:00 p.m.
and we had been planning to leave around 10:00 p.m.[SEP]that only left me thirty minutes to get ready .
i 'd kind of worried i would have to refer to him as mr.[SEP]blue shirt for the rest of my life .
not when all i want to do is drag you out that door and up the stairs to my apartment so i can ... .[SEP]before kane could finish his sentence , a shouting match interrupted him and another fight broke out .
the disappointed look on his face let me know i had failed his test and the whatever he huffed before turning and heading up his stairs , was the bright red pen marking my forehead with a huge f.[SEP]i watched him stomp up his stairs , but before he entered his apartment , he gave me one last look .
before i knew , it the hours had passed and it was already 6:45 p.m.[SEP]we had been on a roll with brainstorming and setting up who would handle which parts of the project .
where did you go ?[SEP]how far did you go ?
well , other than when jessi would have a horrific make out experience and would always refer it to a walker wash.[SEP]i know , i know .
you can wear my clothes and i will throw yours in the wash.[SEP]a shower actually sounded like heaven right now so i nodded .
i bet every bit of it is sexy as f**k.[SEP]ca n't i just toss up your skirt ?
we 're looking for mr.[SEP]deluca 's car .
we 're at a restaurant in downtown st.[SEP]helena , one that makes the best burgers and sandwiches and does n't have a vegetarian or gluten-free option in sight .
and that means , ms.[SEP]harper , that your business mentor for this semester will be bryan leighton .
come in , ms.[SEP]harper , he said , and gestured to the chair near his desk .
while i have the utmost admiration for mr.[SEP]leighton and all that he 's achieved as a chief executive at his company , i 'd very much prefer a mentor in the retail sector , i said .
or else an f.[SEP]that was how he wrote , with words like hanky-panky .
that 's the field mr.[SEP]leighton is in .
i just think - ms.[SEP]harper , professor oliver said gently , but firmly closing a door on my final effort .
i 'll send my car to pick you up at 9 a.m.[SEP]if that works for you .
i noticed this was the first time bryan had addressed someone by the honorific mr.[SEP]caldwell gave him a strange look .
for instance , ms.[SEP]harper 's swift and well-researched recommendation for a new vendor singlehandedly allowed us to stay on track with one of our key accounts .
perhaps it was mrs.[SEP]oliver , but she was on her vacation .
no hanky-panky or else an f.[SEP]then , the professor turned and he was n't my professor after all .
i found it odd that we were discussing ms.[SEP]mortimer as if she were not his wife .
she wanted to be both mrs.[SEP]claire oliver and ms.
so i will have bryan leighton for the first few months , and ms.[SEP]mortimer to finish out the term .
i trust there will be no hanky-panky with ms.[SEP]mortimer as you finish out the term ?
he turned tail , ready to get the hell out of the office , when mr.[SEP]fitzpatrick called out to the receptionist .
excuse me , ms.[SEP]brenner , a voice said , booming through the speaker phone on sutton 's desk .
how marvelous , mr.[SEP]pinkerton chimed in .
one less thing to stress about is a good thing in my book , so i give my gorgeous dog , ms.[SEP]pac-man , a kiss on the snout as i grab my purse from the entryway table .
i 'm so ready to go home and curl up with ms.[SEP]pac-man for a bit , so i hurry over to my car , where i see a white piece of paper tucked under the wiper , flapping in the wind .
but that 's just between you and me , ms.[SEP]pac-man , i tell my dog as i curl up on the couch next to her and send an email to julia , hayden and erin , letting them know their presence is required at my house this evening for an emergency meeting .
this is a photo of mr.[SEP]dybdahl , otherwise known as meter man .
the first few months , all i did was cry at night in ms.[SEP]pac-man 's fur , asking myself what i could have done differently , what had gone wrong , how i 'd let him slip away .
i head home and ms.[SEP]pac-man is so excited to see me that i give her a kiss on her wet snout .
meet me at that electronics store on thursday at 2 p.m.[SEP]for a lesson .
but then again , so am i.[SEP]i will see you there in two days .
then i do shut my computer down for the night , as ms.[SEP]pac-man sleeps at the foot of the bed .
i gather my purse and keys as i finish up the instructions with ms.[SEP]pac-man 's regular dog-sitter/dog walker/dog trainer .
i hired wednesday logan when we adopted ms.[SEP]pac-man and i 'm also the one who attended every dog training session and implemented the instructions .
there 's michelangelo up ahead , trotting in our direction , his wrinkly little face and beige puggy body aiming straight for one of ms.[SEP]pac-man 's legs .
i stay low on my couch and wait for ms.[SEP]pac-man to stop .
i 'm lounging on a deck chair , sunglasses on and ms.[SEP]pac-man at my feet panting from our tennis ball in the waves session a few minutes ago .
very nice , mr.[SEP]mccormick , i say , nodding approvingly .
i close the computer , slide under the covers , and scratch ms.[SEP]pac-man 's ears just the way she likes .
i do n't hear from him as i walk ms.[SEP]pac-man , as i give her dinner , as i heat up pasta for myself .
chapter 1 davis the moment she emerges from the wings and steps on stage at the st.[SEP]james theater to sing her solo , i know-without a shadow of a doubt-that she 's my ava .
we 're in the st.[SEP]james , the three of us : don , stillman and me .
then he walks out , and i believe i 've just learned that stillman might be a musical genius , but is passive aggressive as f**k.[SEP]he has zero interest in decision-making or confrontations .
that 's the show playing in a limited run right now at the st.[SEP]james , and i ca n't help but feel a pang of longing .
evening has fallen , and the lights on the st.[SEP]james are lit up , a beacon that draws in young and old , tourists and residents who want to suspend disbelief for a show .
i 'm looking for m.[SEP]kim , i hear him say , and i stop in my tracks .
it 's rare to have access to the actual stage itself at this point , but since the st.[SEP]james is empty clay worked it into my contract for us to rehearse sooner on the stage itself .
i say goodbye to jill and shelby , duck into the st.[SEP]james , and call stillman , telling him my idea .
should i let ms.[SEP]mccormick know she 'll be playing ava today ?
it 's quite a view , she says drinking in the majesty of the st.[SEP]james from this hideout spot that few people ever see .
she does n't break her gaze , nor do i.[SEP]i do n't know what 's going on .
it 's two blocks from the st.[SEP]james so you can go there some evening after rehearsal .
because i know who he is , beyond the man in the second row of the st.[SEP]james theater who called me in for the chance of a lifetime .
i nod a quick thanks and when the overture fades , i make my entrance to the stage in front of the packed house at the st.[SEP]james theater for my first performance ever in a broadway show .
then she melts into me , pressing her body against mine on the streets of manhattan , outside the st.[SEP]james theater , where i first told her on that cold evening that she was in my show .
i 'm here to inform you , mr.[SEP]vane , that you 've been selected to receive a free massage , compliments of le miridian hotel management .
he heard someone moan-himself ?[SEP]and bent his head forward .
i think we 'll send mrs.[SEP]vane this one .
let 's go to st.[SEP]kilda , abbey suggested .
in her sexy , tight black shorts and white shoestring strapped top she would blend in with the cool rollerbladers , body builders and poseurs on st.[SEP]kilda 's foreshore .
do n't worry about me , mr.[SEP]vane , chirped lucy .
how was he going to tell her nicely that she was a bad p.a.[SEP]and that she was lousy in bed ?
that would only make it awkward for mrs.[SEP]vane and she did n't want to do that .
lucy huffed and puffed some more then said , mrs.[SEP]vane received the photos .
i 'd love to go to new york , mr.[SEP]delaware , please tell me about it .