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3,501 | daddit | I'm sure there are online therapists you could use via video conference. |
3,502 | daddit | I suppose opinions vary. While I can understand hating your blood at times, I can't understand it when they are simply a baby. I can understand hating the 15 yr old who is a little shit and constantly getting arrested or something. However a baby is not doing anything deliberate to make you hate it. As the OP state... |
3,503 | daddit | And most importantly, as they grow, you'll learn ways to curse that isn't going to end up with your kid going to school shouting "FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK". You don't want that. |
3,504 | daddit | Thanks for the advice! |
3,505 | daddit | Thanks for the advice! |
3,506 | daddit | You're comparing seeing a friend die to the birth of a child ? They are literally opposite to each other. Nobody disputes that this guy may be mentally ill but that doesn't make his weird rant less disturbing. |
3,507 | daddit | It has been recognised for at least a decade. Easy to search counselling in any decent country. |
3,508 | daddit | Yeah, many of the non-father responses here show that it's a problem that not enough people know about. |
3,509 | daddit | Exactly. That's exactly what I think. Those things are completely normal and may happen to anybody. |
3,510 | daddit | Ahh but ration can go out the window at 3 am, and its not improbable to understand how someone can have a momentary slip (even if you can never imagine yourself doing it). The important part is not if these feelings surface (because some cant control how they feel) but how do we respond to the actions. |
3,511 | daddit | That's pretty much exactly the conclusion OP came to. He realized he didn't hate the baby, just the difficulty of the situation. |
3,512 | daddit | I don't think people are saying it's rational. I think people here are trying to be supportive of somebody that has gone through a period of severe post partum depression and is perhaps not mentally stable and needs some help. |
3,513 | daddit | Because these symptoms aren't really very uncommon with PPD, which can happen with men. There are plenty of stories of women who want to throw their babies out the window, smother them, shake them, etc. How is wanting to shake your baby any different from wanting to punch them, and yet most new parents I've spoken to w... |
3,514 | daddit | Did you even read the post? He came to realize he doesnt hate his child he hates his new life, lack of sleep, added stress, and emotional instability. He literally fucking said the exact things you just complained about. And you sound pretty fucking naive. In women's health a common part of PPD is a mother thinking... |
3,515 | daddit | Post-partum depression is real in fathers, too. Many of us have had dark thoughts like that without acting on them. Physical and mental exhaustion does weird stuff to you. |
3,516 | daddit | > >You may hate your new life, your lack of sleep, your added stress, and your emotional instability, but how can you actually *hate* a baby? Because the baby is the cause of all those things. Baby's gone and all that stuff goes back to normal. That's where the impulse comes from and it's pretty straightforward. When... |
3,517 | daddit | So many people supporting him too! What in the fuck is this sub?! |
3,518 | daddit | I think you are reading way to much into his post. He's posting the emotions he felt at the time. Using the harsh tones to better describe it. I describe things that way sometimes as well. Sometimes, that's how I vent. That's why his post doesn't alarm me to the point of me thinking he's going to harm his kid.... |
3,519 | daddit | Not really, man, chill out. I mean babies are life changing for a reason. His life changed and like he said he didnt know why it made him so hateful. But he worked through it. Sure some parents never feel that way but its not universal. No two babies are ever the same and no set of parents are the same. He made it thro... |
3,520 | daddit | Is this sub a parent version of r/relationships ? |
3,521 | daddit | Something comes into your life that costs you a fortune, steals away almost all your sleep, pisses, spits, drips snot, vomits on your stuff, keeps you from going out with your friends or even just your spouse, and in exchange it contributes absolutely nothing to your household. But you think it takes some kind of emoti... |
3,522 | daddit | I very much liked your comment and can relate. I was a stay at home dad the first 8 months of my daughters life. I felt an instant bond stronger than anything I'd ever known. I fell in love with her more and more everyday and holding that little baby was the best time of my life. My wife stayed at home the first few mo... |
3,523 | daddit | > pooping screaming machine HA!!!! Yes indeed they are. |
3,524 | daddit | "I'm surely not about to judge someone else for their reaction" remember those words daddy. |
3,525 | daddit | [deleted] |
3,526 | daddit | God forbid someone realizes something negative and works through it to become a better person. People cant control how something makes them feel. Don't act like your shit don't stink |
3,527 | daddit | did you read his whole post? because your dumb fucking comment really highlights that you didnt. |
3,528 | daddit | Well that's not universal. The sound of a crying baby is one of the most god awful annoying things in the world to me, there is no amount of time I can hear a baby crying that doesn't start slowly ratcheting up my anger levels. |
3,529 | daddit | [deleted] |
3,530 | daddit | As far as we can tell from this post we have no reason to think he has tried to get help or will try to get help. Thus he is a piece of shit. |
3,531 | daddit | What? The whole point of this post is that he realized he was doing that and was able to dismantle it. He literally stopped doing the thing you're criticizing him for. Are we going to crucify and label people as psychopaths or actual child-killers in waiting because they had crazy thoughts during an emotional time in ... |
3,532 | daddit | >Learning to rationalize and eventually control the impact of your feelings is a part of growing up. Sounds like exactly what OP did. So what's your problem? That it took him too long for your tastes? |
3,533 | daddit | Yeah, fuck this guy. Fuck this post. I can't believe people are sympathizing with this dickhead. You hate an innocent little newborn child that can't even fend for itself yet? Suck it up and grow the fuck up. What an asshole. |
3,534 | daddit | I don't think having those feelings makes you a piece of shit, but I think not *immediately* trying to seek professional help and relying on drugs instead makes you a piece of shit. |
3,535 | daddit | [deleted] |
3,536 | daddit | This is the same dumb, arrogant, ignorant, asinine stubbornness that sentenced generations of mother's into depression and in some cases suicide. Congratulations you are a fucking piece of shit. - Signed a father who loves and thinks his kids are a blessing. |
3,537 | daddit | Yeah, something must have happened in his childhood. What a piece of shit. |
3,538 | daddit | Lol, this guy gets it. |
3,539 | daddit | Right It's interesting to hear about and compare life experiences with other dads; it's not good to always assume other people have the same feelings and ideas as yourself. |
3,540 | daddit | It'll get easier, but it's going to take a while. By month four, he's gonna be god's gift to the world to you. |
3,541 | daddit | Yes, I actually mean literally besides OP reasoning of responsibilities. |
3,542 | daddit | Thank you. It was an oddly enlightening moment in my life. We had another child, a daughter, a year and a half later. My son was a good baby. Didn't cry much. Cooperated with us. But having that trouble and that learning experience enabled us to deal with our daughter who would. Not. Shut. The. Fuck. Up. For the first... |
3,543 | daddit | Is post-partum common for fathers? Pregnancy is obviously a vastly different experience for the mother. |
3,544 | daddit | someone posts about their want to destroy their own baby and I get a bit annoyed, fuck sake. |
3,545 | daddit | I read the whole thing and agree thoroughly that OP ought to have child protection services remove him from his son. |
3,546 | daddit | When I lost my daughter I didn't sleep well for awhile. I know what it does to you, it's not an excuse though. |
3,547 | daddit | -reads story of man that hates his children. -gets inspired Keep sucking ops dick |
3,548 | daddit | Yea your kids |
3,549 | daddit | Ha! |
3,550 | daddit | Actually it sounds like OP is going to shake that baby until it stops crying as soon as things get stressful again, but you know, same difference. |
3,551 | daddit | why do people keep saying this? there isn't anything redeemable the dude is an idiot. |
3,552 | daddit | Nah, I read the whole spiel. "Dad" thinks mom is a better parent and then hated kid. |
3,553 | daddit | Did you bother reading? |
3,554 | daddit | Excuse me how many children have you parented? PS [this is what WebMD has to say about postpartum depression in men](http://www.webmd.com/depression/postpartum-depression/news/20080506/men-also-get-postpartum-depression) . According to this article, it can actually have more of an impact on a child's emotional develo... |
3,555 | daddit | [deleted] |
3,556 | daddit | gottem |
3,557 | daddit | Did everyone here about that shit? Hulu makes you pay no matter what now, there's limited commercial subscription and no commercial. Where am I supposed to watch thousands of free videos now! |
3,558 | daddit | Dad status: verified. |
3,559 | daddit | This guy was just trying to help, no need to call him a joke |
3,560 | daddit | Mental health can be an extremely funny thing. You can be miserable with whatever is ailing you, and because you don't know what's wrong you just tell yourself that you're imagining it, tamp it down, ignore it, do anything to convince yourself that you're not defective and incompetent when everyone around you seems to ... |
3,561 | daddit | If a an says he'd kill his son if there was no consequences, then something is wrong with him. I'm sorry but that is not okay, it's unstable. |
3,562 | daddit | [deleted] |
3,563 | daddit | Judgmental!? He explicitly laid out in the post he would happily murder his child in a world without consequences.. |
3,564 | daddit | [deleted] |
3,565 | daddit | possibly, but it looks like a sea of scams :/ |
3,566 | daddit | "We" as in here in this thread. He's not some terrible person. He had a problem and needed help. |
3,567 | daddit | I am feeling those things right now. But wanting to Murder your kid in a World without consequences sounds like a disaster waiting to happen. Edit: Not even mentioning using drugs to solve your problems. I guess all fathers has felt the need to down a gallon of whiskey, but with an infant and a wife with depression, ... |
3,568 | daddit | Did you actually read the whole post? If not, I suggest you do that before commenting. |
3,569 | daddit | Some babies suck the life out of you, and if you've never had a really tough baby, you'll never know to what extent a person can truly feel about even their own child. The point of this post is that he was able to figure out that his anger wasn't at his baby, it was at himself. Takes a big person to openly admit those ... |
3,570 | daddit | I'm sorry, but saying you'd murder your own child in a world without consequence is taking things way too far. It reads like a troll post honestly "watch me go on daddit and say I'd murder my child, then get praised for making up some redeeming bullshit at the end." If someone really hated their child, to the point of ... |
3,571 | daddit | I'm with you, man. Many people feel and react without examining WHY they feel and react the way they do. I'm glad this dude found his epiphany and it helped change his mindset and find love and patience. |
3,572 | daddit | No really - OP is legit messed up, and there is no excuse for what he posted. It's legitimately scary and extreme cause for concern |
3,573 | daddit | Same. Baby noises are extremely irritating. One of many reasons why I intend to never have a child. |
3,574 | daddit | And the epiphany was "I don't want to murder my own infant child" |
3,575 | daddit | You sound like the clickbait totle of a buzzfeed article. Go home. |
3,576 | daddit | This is the same dumb, arrogant, ignorant, asinine stubbornness that sentenced generations of mother's into depression and in some cases suicide. Congratulations you are a fucking piece of shit. - Signed a father who loves and thinks his kids are a blessing. |
3,577 | daddit | so you are telling me that this is a sarcastic comment? and I'm supposed to get this from the above? Thats why we have /s tag.Im sorry but its not clear you are joking. |
3,578 | daddit | He was going through something, this was him helping people deal with it. Depression is a thing man, be a little fucking sensitive. Not everyone needs tough love or berating. |
3,579 | daddit | Can you not empathise with someone who has felt some awful things (and clearly not acted on them) when having a tough time, and being sleep-deprived? Do you also judge women who think these things when they've given birth? If so you must be spending a lot of time judging people |
3,580 | daddit | Your hostility is amusing. |
3,581 | daddit | Fucking REKT. |
3,582 | daddit | whew that's spicy |
3,583 | daddit | Then you didn't understand what he wrote. He is saying he realized the source is his anger was with himself and not with his son. That when he made that connection his life, and the lives of his family began to change for the better. But if you want to keep hating on someone whose only flaw was entirely internal and... |
3,584 | daddit | Lol. whuttt? WebMD says so then it must be true. So your telling me, that for thousands of years, men have been dealing with postpartum depression, undiagnosed, but now finally, in 2008, scientists asked 5,000 American men if they are depressed about having a kid and 1/10 said yes, therefore its totally legit now. Of c... |
3,585 | daddit | So of the three W's to choose from, he would have picked the least appropriate. |
3,586 | daddit | I thought his phone auto-corrected "weed" to "wide" >I was able to look to my expert, the **weed** He did talk about having an epiphany after smoking a bag, so... |
3,587 | daddit | www.thepiratebay.se.net |
3,588 | daddit | Kodi TV |
3,589 | daddit | I ended up upping my plan to the no commercial plan because I hate the commercials. If it wasn't the same commercial every single day for months at a time I would be fine, but I just couldn't handle it anymore. Low and behold, 1 day after we upgrade, we start getting ads on certain shows. I did some research and found ... |
3,590 | daddit | You can watch movies on Vudu with commercials now. |
3,591 | daddit | Ow. |
3,592 | daddit | And honestly I'm not sure this is even about neurodiversity or any of that, I think this guy was just going through the shock that comes with a total change in lifestyle, along with some resentment of his own impotence in the face of caring for his newborn. Once he realized what the problem was, he accepted his feeling... |
3,593 | daddit | Honestly do you really think he was seriously considering killing his infant son? Have you never heard of hyperbole being used for emphasis? Obviously this is an exaggeration to show the hopelessness and resentment that he felt during his bout with postpartum depression. And obviously you didn't read the end, so let me... |
3,594 | daddit | Look I completely understand what he's saying, the issue here is the circle jerk of his post being great because of its "unapologetic" nature. This is a social psychological thing we see everyday. Things Miley Cyrus did that first year were fucked up right? Nobody wanted her to be that role model an more, but when she... |
3,595 | daddit | > It just creeps me out right like that you could even have those thoughts This sort of statement is the reason so many people don't get the help they need. Why does it matter if it creeps you out, or you can't empathize? Just move on and let people who can empathize address it. The dude had feelings, *holy shit*.... |
3,596 | daddit | It is completely normal to have feelings like this. I love both of my kids, with the most complete and total love I have ever felt. In fact, I honestly didn't even know what love really was until I had my children. But that being said, there have been times (MANY times) that I thought about how different my life would ... |
3,597 | daddit | > It's when the love should have changed from a default protective love to a deep, unconditional love. I really wish people would stop talking about how parents "should" feel; it's extremely arrogant. There is no "should" with how someone feels when they have a baby. How you felt is how *you* felt, but other people ar... |
3,598 | daddit | I was right where this dude was. I really disliked my newborn. He was not a great baby... It almost tore our relationship apart. By about 6 months i took a 360. Now that he's 2, I fucking love the shit out of him. Some people just aren't compatible with newborns. Some newborns are just really unbearable. Don't judge. T... |
3,599 | daddit | Congratulations for you. YOU dont matter though in this case. No one cares about YOUR ability to understand him. This is not about YOU. Grow up and come to terms plenty of people go thru PPD, its fucked up and it can be unsettling. Now stop trying to come to terms with something you'll never understand (unless it ha... |
3,600 | daddit | My daughter just turned three, and I absolutely hated fatherhood for the first year. I had never dealt with sleep deprivation before in my life. Her mom did most of the work. I felt absolutely wildly insane and as well as angry. Between her postpartum depression and my stress at work due to lacking sleep and not be... |
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