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pesh shook his head .

`` no .

you get him closed back up .

i 'm sure they 'll want to see him . ''

he took off his bloody gloves and tossed them dejectedly into the hazardous materials trash can and then removed his mask .

he walked over to the glass doors of the trauma area where a paramedic stood surveying the scene .

`` do we have a name on him ? ''

the paramedic flashed the guy 's driver 's license .

`` aaron chapman . ''

`` thank you . ''

he walked down the long hallway before pushing open the button on the mechanical door that led out of the emergency area .

in a room to the side of the waiting room , the man 's wife and two teenage sons sat in hushed silence .

as he opened the door , he said a silent prayer for strength .

this was the most difficult aspect of his job .

while he relished in the long hours of saving lives and diagnosing illnesses , this part drained him both emotionally and physically .

`` mrs .

chapman ? ''

the woman , who appeared to be in her late thirties or early forties , rose from the chair she was sitting in .

`` yes ? ''

he held out his hand for her to shake .

`` i 'm dr. nadeen .

i was assigned your husband 's case . ''

she bobbed her head and took a step forward .

`` how is he ? ''

`` your husband experienced a severe myocardial infarction . ''

at her blank look , he replied , `` a heart attack . ''

`` oh my god , i ca n't believe it .

he 's had some high cholesterol , but he 's been running every day .

i was only ten minutes from here dropping the boys off at school , and i told them i bet their dad had fallen and broken his ankle or something .

of course , i wondered why he would n't call instead of the hospital ... '' realizing she was rambling , her voice cut off .

her hand hovered over her throat .

`` but he 's okay now ? ''

pesh shook his head .

`` i 'm very sorry , but the heart attack caused too much damage to the heart .

we were never able to revive him after he was brought in . ''

the woman 's eyes widened to the size of dinner plates .

`` no , no , no !

surely there is something you can do ! ''

`` i 'm so very sorry .

we did everything we could to save him , including multiple attempts of resuscitation past what the paramedics originally did , but he did not respond to our attempts . ''

the woman 's wail pierced through to pesh 's soul .

she collapsed back against her sons , who now had tears in their eyes .

stoic on the outside , pesh stood by her side as she sobbed uncontrollably .

most doctors when playing the grim reaper would deliver the bad news and then retreat .

pesh believed that part of a patient 's care also meant the care of their family .

that 's why he ignored his pager going off in his pocket .

it was only when his name was paged over the intercom that he took a step forward .

he placed a hand on the widow 's shoulder .

`` if you would like to be with him until the funeral home arrives , you can follow me . ''

`` y-yes , please , '' she murmured .

with her sons flanking her , she followed pesh out of the room and behind the mechanized doors .

when they got to the exam room where her husband 's body was , pesh turned and once again touched her shoulder .

`` i 'm so very sorry for your loss . ''

`` thank you , '' her son mumbled when his mother was unable to speak .

instead , she rushed forward to bury her head against her husband 's chest .

her body shook with her sobs .

pesh nodded and then finally turned away .

with determined steps , he answered his page-some sort of consult on a diagnosis .

after his input , this patient would pull through .

it was the true embodiment of the dichotomy of his job .

once he finished , pesh went over to the office area of the emergency room .

he eased down onto a stool , placing his head in his hands .

as he rubbed his eyes , he swore they were moist from overuse , not from the potential tears welling behind them .

if there was one thing he was , it was a professional .

doctors had to be emotionally detached when they were doing their job , or they would lose their minds .

but it was n't staying detached in the moment that was the issue-it was the aftermath .

the agonizing moments when the adrenaline stores depleted , and his sagging body seemed to shoulder the hysteria , the panic , the grief , and the heartbreak of the family .

he did n't know how long he remained like that , head in his hands , tuning out the noises humming around him .

when he felt a tap on his shoulder , he jerked around .

it was kristi , a charge nurse and one of his most trusted coworkers .

she smiled warmly at him as if she knew the inner turmoil he was in .

`` dr. nadeen , i hate to interrupt , but you have a visitor . ''

`` oh ? ''

kristi nodded .

`` exam room d. '' `` thank you . ''

when pesh pushed open the door , he could n't help the surprise that filled him .

with her auburn hair pulled into a loose knot and her emerald eyes glittering with happiness , emma harrison fitzgerald , stood before him with her six-month-old son balanced on her hip .

`` hi .

i hope i 'm not interrupting you . ''

a rush of pure love entered his chest at the sight of her .

nine months ago he would have confused the feeling with amorous love , but now he knew the difference .

he loved her only as a friend .

`` hello to you , too .

it 's so good to see you . ''

his brows furrowed as his mind wondered why she was here in the er .

`` you 're okay , are n't you ? ''

`` oh , i 'm perfectly well .

it 's just- '' pesh 's gaze dropped to the strawberry-blond haired boy sucking voraciously on a pacifier .

`` noah 's fine , is n't he ? ''

emma smiled .

`` he 's perfect . ''

pesh exhaled the anxious breath he 'd been holding .

`` i 'm glad to hear that .

you both look well . ''

`` thank you . ''

emma surveyed him and frowned .

`` i wish i could say the same for you .

what 's wrong ? ''

`` just a tough day . ''

even with emma 's expectant expression , he did n't want to elaborate .