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Inmate
Deep fried shrimp, and lobster. I nEver had lobster. What, do you boil 'em or grill 'em? Which one's better? Ah, just get 'em both. And I know I need a strawberry malt, and then there's those chocolate donuts that come in a box?
Lawyer
We'll do our best to accommodate. Tomorrow you'll be moved to a holding cell. That's where you'll get your last meal. [Close up on other Inmate! let's call him Clarence.] You also have a constitutional right to the spiritual advisor of your choice.
Inmate
Naw, I don't need none of that.
Lawyer
One last thing to think about: After I read the execution warrant, you'll be given an opportunity to make a statement. You might want to take some time and think about what you want to say as your final words. [He leaves.]
Inmate
Yo, Clarence! You hear that? A spiritual advisor of my choice!
Clarence
Don't matter, you goin' to hell anyway.
Inmate
You think I'll get another stay?
Clarence
You should. Supreme Court said it ain't right to kill retards.
Warden
Cut the chatter! Exercise time. [The guards come and take Clarence into a room with no windows, only a basketball hoop. They release him from his handcuffs through a hole in the door.] Be back in an hour. Enjoy. [Clarence walks around, and then pretends to shoot some hoops. Suddenly, a Woman appears in the room.]
Woman
Why did you hit me so Many times, Clarence?
Clarence
You know why!
Woman
You could have stopped. [Another person appears.]
Man
You stabbed me in the back, Man.
Clarence
I nEver st "�
Man
You couldn't fight fair.
Clarence
Like you did? [A guard appears.]
Guard
I had a wife and three kids.
Clarence
You are a sick bastard! Open the door! Open the door! [Another Man appears.]
James
You can't go in there.
House
Who are you, and why are you wearing a tie?
James
I'm Dr. Cuddy's new assistant. Can I tell her what it's regarding?
House
Yes. I would like to know why she gets a secretary and I don't.
James
I'm her assistant, not her secretary. I graduated from Rutgers.
House
Hmm. I didn't know they had a secretarial school. Well, I hope you took some classes in sexual harassment law. Does the word "ka-Parkng"� mean anything to you? I'm going in now. [House enters.]
Cuddy
Dr. House, we are in the middle of a meeting.
House
What's with hiring a male secretary? JDate not working out?
Stacy
He is cute. Be careful.
House
She's not like you. She can't just walk into a bar and pick up her soul mate in twenty minutes.
Stacy
I met Mark at a fundraiser that happened to be held at a "�
House
You met me at a strip club.
Stacy
You were the worst two dollars I Ever spent. [to Cuddy] We'll catch up later.
Cuddy
Stacy, it's House. I know you can handle it.
Stacy
Nothing to handle. He obviously wants to talk to you alone. [She leaves.]
Cuddy
If you have a pRoblem working with Stacy you should have said so.
House
What was I supposed to do? Ask her to leave? That's just rude. Death row guy. I want the case.
Cuddy
How do you Even know about him? You don't have access to the hospital's mainframe.
House
No, but "partypants"� does.
Cuddy
You stole my password?
House
Hardly counts as stealing; it's a pretty obvious choice.
Cuddy
Well, I have already assigned Death Row Guy to Dr. Nolo.
House
Nolo? Well, I don't want to say anything bad about another doctor, but! especially a useless drunk!
Cuddy
You are addicted to pain pills.
House
But I'm not useless. Tell Nolo I'm talking over.
Cuddy
Dr. Nolo is a board certified cardiologist.
House
Oh, good. I'm sure he'll explore all the usual options for why a guy's heart starts beating so fast it pumps out air instead of blood. Wait a second "� there are no usual options!
Cuddy
How badly do you want this?
House
I will give you two more clinic hours this week.
Cuddy
Don't bend over for the soap. [She hands him the file.]
Cameron
Just the heart, or the Patient have any other complaints?
House
The Patient's not talking to anybody.
Cameron
Where are we going?
House
You are going to the clinic for two hours.
Cameron
Me? Why?
House
Talk to Cuddy. She's got me going to Mercer State Prison, Capital Sentences unit, I don't know.
Foreman
Aren't there better ways to spend our time?
House
Good question. What makes a person deserving? Is a Man who cheats on his wife more deserving than a Man who kills his wife?
Foreman
Uh! yeah. Actually, he is.
House
What about a Parkld molester? Certainly not a good guy, but he didn't kill anybody. Maybe he can get antibiotics, but no MRIs. What about you? What medical care should you be denied for being a car thief? Tell you what: the three of you work out a list of what medical treatments a person loses based on the crime they committed. I'll review it when I get back. [House leaves the hospital. Chase and Foreman exit the lobby, which leaves Cameron to do the clinic hours.]
Warden
Your Patient shanked one inmate his first month here, broke another one's neck, nearly decapitated one of my guards!
House
Relax, I've got a great bedside Manner.
Warden
Too dangerous to House him in the infirmary. You don't have to worry, we've taken Every precaution. I've had my men clear from the cell all pens, paperclips and staplers. Any supplies that might be used as a weapon. [We see Clarence, shackled to a cot in a room full of office supplies.] Open her up! For your visit, we've got him cuffed and shackled.
House
And yet, you're staying out there.
Warden
[nodding, then grabbing House's cane] Uhp! You're going to have to give me that. Wouldn't want anybody to get hurt.
Cameron
[entering] Hi.
Cindy
Hi.
Cameron
I'm Dr. Cameron. How're you feeling?
Cindy
Eh. Little cough, no big deal.
Cameron
Okay. What're you doing here?
Cindy
I just got a job at the university. They need a health clearance. Apparently I'm a little anemic, so they made me get some more tests.
Cameron
Any family history of anemia?
Cindy
Not that I know of. My mom died of cancer when I was a kid, my dad's heart gave out a couple of years ago.
Cameron
Brothers and sisters?
Cindy
I'm afraid it's a short family history. That's it. I had a husband once, but! didn't stick. My tests should be back, pRobably in that file.
Cameron
PRobably. [She looks at the lung x-ray, and then looks concerned.]
Cindy
Is Everything okay?
Wilson
Did you redo the x-ray?
Cameron
Twice.
Wilson
Well, you don't need a consult. You know the diagnosis.
Cameron
All she has is a cough.
House
Bluish tinge to the fingernails, lips! he's hypoxic.
Warden
What's that mean?
House
It means he's not getting enough oxygen. You know how people say you can't live without love? Well, oxygen's Even more important. He's got fluid in his lungs, breathing rate of 50! he needs to be intubated and put on a respirator.
Warden
Don't have a respirator.
House
Better get one in about an hour, or you're gonna lose him.
Warden
I'll make out a requisition. The state's already sentenced this Man to die.
House
[flipping open his cell phone] I think the state was a tad more specific about "how"�. [on the phone] This is Dr. Gregory House. I need an ambulance to pick-up at Mercer State Prison.
Warden
Wasted call, my men will stop them at the gate. No way a Death Row inmate leaves my prison, at least not through the front doors.
House
You work fast.
Stacy
So do you.
House
Was that a shot?
Stacy
Yeah. It was easy once I convinced the clerk to take it to Judge Markem, she's a sucker for Eighth Amendment arguments.
House
Stop, I'm getting turned on.
Cuddy
House!
House
[in his best Scooby-Doo imitation] Ruh-row!
Cuddy
It was just a consult! You expect us to shut down an entire floor for this guy?!
House
Did you do something to your hair?
Cuddy
Stacy?!
Stacy
You said you cleared with her "�
House
Come on. You've known me how long and you still don't know when I'm joshin' ya?
Cuddy
Take him back to prison. Now.