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SCP-072 is a shadowy and translucent projection which resembles a .

*** Item #: SCP-072 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: All known instances of SCP-072 are to be contained in a 3.5 by 4 meter holding cell. Access is allowed only during authorized testing procedures. Without prior approval from Senior Researcher Grant, no materials created for the purpose of being slept on are to be introduced into a 15-meter vicinity of the holding cell. Description: Instances of SCP-072 were first discovered in an apartment building in ████████, Michigan, after two local media reports on SCP-072’s effects caused a local panic which drew the attention of embedded Foundation Agent ███████. SCP-072 is a shadowy and translucent projection which resembles a .9-meter-long hand, the ‘fingers’ of which taper to a sharp point. Detailed recording of SCP-072 is difficult, as it does not manifest at light levels above 5 lux. Instances of SCP-072 have only been observed to manifest when a human (hereafter referred to as “the subject”) enters REM sleep while located in a bed ‘infected’ by SCP-072 and leaves a foot or feet exposed to open air. If these conditions are satisfied, SCP-072 will emerge from the foot of the bed and appear to use its pointer finger to ‘tap’ on the subject’s foot until they awaken. Subjects have reported that, at this point, they were unable to move, showing symptoms similar to sleep paralysis. This continues as long as SCP-072 is visible. SCP-072 will then use its pointed fingers to cut portions of flesh from the exposed parts of the subject's foot or feet. It will return to within the bed in between each removal, emerging without the collected material. This will continue until SCP-072 has taken all of the exposed foot or feet, stopping at the ankle. Though subjects exposed to SCP-072 report this process to be immensely painful, its paralytic effects render them unable to scream or call for help. It is unknown if manifestations of SCP-072 feed on the collected material or use them for some other purpose. As long as the wounds are properly treated, SCP-072’s effects are not fatal, but have been observed to cause psychological damage relating to sleep in the future. There is also a secondary effect: Any bed within an approximately 10-meter vicinity of a bed which manifests the effects of SCP-072 will also host an instance of SCP-072. Destruction of a bed affected by SCP-072 reveals no anomalous materials and no trace of biological material removed from subjects. Addendum List of known SCP-072 objects: SCP-072-1, -2, and -3, recovered from original apartment complex, three twin-sized beds which were located within 10 meters of one another. SCP-072-4, a king-sized four-poster bed contaminated during SCP-072’s time in Site-██ Temporary Anomalous Objects Holding. SCP-072-5, a sleeping bag with bottom removed introduced to SCP-072-1 for testing. When D-2191 entered REM sleep in object, [DATA EXPUNGED]. SCP-072-5 not recommended for testing in future. SCP-072-6 and -7, beds introduced to SCP-072-2 and later destroyed for examination. Remains of SCP-072-6 and -7 appear unaffected, but are to be contained until further studies may be completed.

SCP-3168 is a Russian matryoshka 7-layer nesting doll, which induces anomalous mutations in the offspring of the domestic chicken (Gallus gallus domesticus).

*** Item #: SCP-3168 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-3168 is to be kept in a standard inanimate-object containment locker at Area-12. Research proposals involving the use of SCP-3168 must be made in writing to site command. Unless required for authorized experimentation or study, instances of SCP-3168-1 are to be euthanized by the time they are three years old; the remains of instances of SCP-3168-1 that are not required for experimentation or study are to be incinerated. Description: SCP-3168 is a Russian matryoshka 7-layer nesting doll, which induces anomalous mutations in the offspring of the domestic chicken (Gallus gallus domesticus). When a female chicken ('hen') mates (or is artificially inseminated) while within approximately a 3-meter radius of SCP-3168, and then lays fertilized eggs, the fertilized eggs will contain instances of SCP-3168-1; this effect will only occur when the top halves of SCP-3168's 6 outer layers have been removed and the innermost doll is nested within the 6 bottom halves. SCP-3168's anomalous mutagenic effect affects only hens, such that semen extracted from a male chicken ('rooster') within SCP-3168's range will not produce anomalous offspring if used to inseminate hens outside its range; as well, the anomalous mutagenesis does not persist post-exposure, and hens who have previously been exposed to SCP-3168 are capable of subsequently producing non-anomalous offspring. Instances of SCP-3168-1 are anomalous organisms which resemble ambulatory houses on chicken legs; Foundation folklorists have noted the similarity to the Russian legend of Baba Yaga.[1]Aside from their legs and feet, the organisms are not composed of biological matter, but rather of standard architectural materials: boards, masonry, nails, etc. Despite their anomalous form and composition, instances of SCP-3168-1 follow the standard chicken life cycle, hatching from their eggs an average of 21 days after fertilization, at which point they are the size of non-anomalous newly-hatched chickens; radiographic and ultrasound examination of SCP-3168-1 eggs reveal the presence of microscopic architectural components as early as 5 days after fertilization. Tissue samples from the legs of SCP-3168-1 instances reveal a genetic match to the parent chickens, and a sex ratio of approximately 50%. Blood is present in the legs; dye tracing indicates that this blood circulates from one leg to the other despite the lack of a heart, and despite the fact that there is no non-architectural connection between the legs. Legs produce heat at a rate sufficient to maintain standard chicken body temperature. SCP-3168-1 instances will "eat" both standard chicken feed and raw architectural materials by sweeping it into themselves with their open doors. Isotopic labeling has shown that the chicken feed is converted into the lignin of the instances' woodwork. The architectural materials are assimilated into the instances' structures via an unknown mechanism; it is to be noted that these architectural materials are typically insufficient to account for the composition of the structures, both in quantity and in substance (e.g., instances hatched in an aluminum-free environment may nonetheless develop aluminum siding), a conclusive indicator of ectoentropic hylogenesis. SCP-3168-1 instances are rejected at a rate of 15-25%[2] by hens who have not previously raised offspring, and at a rate of 80-90%[2] by hens who have previously raised non-anomalous offspring. SCP-3168-1 instances emulate the behavior of non-anomalous hatchling and juvenile chickens, to the extent that their anomalous physiology makes this possible. They are apparently capable of sight (despite their lack of any eyes or brain), and can (as is standard for birds) imprint on researchers who are present at their hatching; they also replicate standard chicken vocalization by rapidly opening and closing their doors and windows (although male instances have not been observed to crow). SCP-3168-1 instances grow at the rate of non-anomalous chickens until approximately three and a half years of age, at which point they begin to express an anomalous derivative of chicken growth hormone (despite the lack of any glands where such a hormone could be produced); when purified, this hormone can induce ectoentropically rapid growth in non-anomalous chickens and in architectural structures. A wide variety of architectural styles are represented in SCP-3168-1 physiology. Although the factors determining architectural style remain to be elucidated, 75-80% of SCP-3168-1 instances parented by a given pair of chickens will consistently manifest the same style, with the remainder being an assorted mixture. The breed(s) of the parents does not seem to play a part: for example, when hen 3168-F-417 is bred to rooster 3168-M-131, the offspring have consistently been 75% split-level ranch, while the offspring of that same hen with rooster 3168-M-132 have consistently been 75% Pacific lodge, even though all three birds are purebred Orpington chickens. <4% of instances are non-residential in nature, including but not limited to convenience stores, stadiums, water filtration plants, grain elevators, warehouses, movie theaters, greenhouses, parking garages, and exact replicas of Saint Paul's Cathedral, the Taj Mahal, and the Parliament House of Ghana. Many structures will have carpeting, plumbing fixtures, and electrical wiring; however, furniture is rare. All locks on instances with the same parents will be openable by the same key (or proportionately reduced copies thereof). Incident Log: In June 2005, an unrelated containment breach led to the collapse of a retaining wall at Area-12, where a brood of six instances of SCP-3168-1 were being raised for study. Five of the instances were killed when the wall fell on them; however, debris from the wall was misidentified as having come from the sixth instance, which instead escaped into the wild. In December 2011, the instance (conclusively identified by tissue samples and architectural matching) was recovered 800km away, after it fell through river ice and drowned; it was 8.5 m tall. Acquisition Log: SCP-3168 was obtained from a raid on a Marshall, Carter and Dark storage facility; accompanying provenance documents showed that a former GRU-P agent traded it to MC&D in 1998, in exchange for having his gambling debts forgiven. Footnotes 1. SCP-352 has expressed ignorance of SCP-3168, but did not respond to further questioning. 2. depending on breed of chicken

SCP-2232 is a smartphone superficially resembling a sky-blue Samsung Galaxy S4, running on a modified version of the Android operating system listed as Android 5.

*** Item #: SCP-2232 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: Each instance of SCP-2232 is to be kept in a standard Safe-class containment locker when not in use. Using SCP-2232 to make calls or send text messages must be done in the presence of a certified bird handler. SCP-2232 must not be left unattended while being charged. Use of SCP-2232 instances for tracking telephone based anomalies, including SCP-3046, has been approved on a case by case basis. Description: SCP-2232 is a smartphone superficially resembling a sky-blue Samsung Galaxy S4, running on a modified version of the Android operating system listed as Android 5.7.4 "Delicious Sunflower Seeds". SCP-2232's casing has so far resisted all attempts to be opened, and any attempts to do so have resulted in SCP-2232 vibrating violently and emitting a loud, squawking noise. 10 9 instances of SCP-2232 are currently in Foundation possession, labeled as SCP-2232-01 through -101. Update: As per Incident-2232-01, SCP-2232-03 has been neutralised. Samples of its remains are currently stored in the Inert Biological Sample wing of Site-77. Using SCP-2232 to call a valid telephone number causes it to transform into a common hill myna, which then appears to reproduce via budding to produce a second, smaller myna. The second instance, designated SCP-2232-A, will then attempt to fly directly towards the location of the dialed telephone. SCP-2232 has been found to be able to locate both mobile and landline telephones once provided with the appropriate number. However, should SCP-2232 be used to call telephones located more than 40km away, it will instead prompt the user to "kindly enable Airplane Mode for long-distance communication." Once it has reached its destination, SCP-2232-A will then attempt to attract the attention of the nearest human being by mimicking loud noises like alarms or heavy machinery, or flapping its wings in his/her face. From this point onwards, SCP-2232 and SCP-2232-A will function as a two-way voice transmission system, with speech addressed to the former instantaneously vocalised by the latter and vice versa. The call can be terminated any time by grabbing either myna and turning it gently upside-down, resulting in SCP-2232 reverting to its smartphone form, and SCP-2232-A disappearing in a puff of carbon dust. Using SCP-2232 to send a text message to a valid mobile telephone number causes SCP-2232 to transform into a homing pigeon, designated SCP-2232-B. SCP-2232-B will then travel towards the messaged mobile telephone, vocalise the text message, and travel back to its original location. Should its destination be more than 500km away, SCP-2232 will also prompt the user to enable Airplane Mode. Enabling Airplane Mode from SCP-2232's settings will apparently allow calls and messages to be sent to any location on Earth; however, SCP-2232 will instead assume the form of (in the case of a text message), or produce an instance of (in the case of a telephone call), a great white pelican, designated SCP-2232-C. SCP-2232-C will then proceed to travel towards the location of its recipient. Upon reaching its destination, SCP-2232-C will open its beak, revealing either an instance of SCP-2232-A or SCP-2232-B, which will then perform its intended function as detailed above. Once the intended function has been performed, SCP-2232-C appears to consume the instance of SCP-2232-A or SCP-2232-B and fly back towards its original location. The avian forms of SCP-2232 will stop for food and water along their journeys, rest when tired, and have been known to ride on vehicles to reach their destinations. SCP-2232 is highly impractical as a form of communication, as short-range calls can take up to a day to reach its recipient, while long-range intercontinental transmissions are estimated to take up to several years. Incident-2232-01: Following scheduled experimentation on 03/05/15, Research Assistant Chang left SCP-2232-03 plugged into its charging port overnight in storage locker #284. When the containment locker was reopened the next day, a large white mass rapidly expanded outwards from it, pinning Research Assistant Chang onto the opposite wall of the storage room and swiftly obscuring the view of the security cameras. On-site security forces found the door of the storage room blocked from the inside, and eventually gained access using low-yield explosives. The inside of the storage room appeared to be uniformly lined with a thick layer of flesh covered in white feathers, with the exception of the inside of locker #284, which was heavily charred. Samples of the flesh sent for analysis revealed it to be of avian origin, and consisted of living muscle tissue connected to a rudimentary blood supply with several hearts. An extensive skeletal framework supporting the muscle tissue was also discovered, apparently made of copper, glass and assorted plastics. Site maintenance staff armed with propane torches and machetes eventually extracted the body of Research Assistant Chang and evacuated the other items contained in the storage room. The remaining flesh was then excised and the room disinfected with bleach. Incident-2232-02: On 20/08/15, SCP-2232-08 began vibrating and cawing on its own accord. Its screen indicated that it was receiving an incoming long-distance call. With permission from Head Researcher Tannenbaum, Research Assistant Goh answered SCP-2232-08, which promptly assumed its myna form. The following conversation was recorded. <Begin log> Research Assistant Goh: Um, hello? SCP-2232-08: Oh, my god! You found my phone! Thank you soooo much! I thought I left it in the cassowary when I went to work, and- Goh: Sorry, to whom am I speaking to here? SCP-2232-08: Oh, this is Casey Durham, I live in [unintelligible], on the lower east side seagull, listen, is there any way for you to return my phone to me? Goh: Well, see, we can't exactly return your phone at the moment- SCP-2232-08: Oh, I'm not in any trouble, am I? Dear lord, that one time I was in the accident with the blue-footed booby was bad enough, I don't think I- Goh: Excuse me - the blue-footed booby? SCP-2232-08: Yeah, it just swerved into my lane, and didn't even sound the horn or anything, or signal, and the headlights and the passenger door on the old cassowary was just all busted up for weeks, I had to pay the repairmen, the insurance flamingo was simply insane, and - sorry, it's been a rough few months for me, listen. I've got some very important contacts and pictures on that bird, it means a lot to me, believe me. If there's a nearby Australian bush turkey you can drop it in a package and just put it in the interstate mail slot to number 23 [unintelligible - presumed to be an address], send it right to the doorstep of my Spix's macaw. That's okay with you, right? Goh: Um, could you clarify what you mean by - SCP-2232-08: Voice call roaming limit exceeded. Please contact your local Wingtel representative for inquiries on any additional roaming charges incurred. <End log> Footnotes 1. Similarities between SCP-2232 instances and the phones seen carried by riders of SCP-2965 has been observed. Research into a shared origin of these phones is ongoing.

SCP-6983 is a humanoid with an estimated height of 5 meters.

*** Item #: SCP-6983 Object Class: Ticonderoga1 Special Containment Procedures: Undercover personnel within various national and international space programs are to plant the file Binary_Star.aic in both the hardware of control centers and digital components of all launched projects. Foundation AI "Binary Star" will intercept and record all data about SCP-6983 for the Foundation database and summarily delete it from non-Foundation records. Class B amnestics may be administered to witnesses if deemed necessary. Description: SCP-6983 is a humanoid with an estimated height of 5 meters. It has been noted to repair planetary rings, atmospheres, and other celestial objects by using an unknown welding technique utilising its fingertips to weld objects together. The entity also uses this technique to communicate via light signaling. The details of how SCP-6983 sustains itself or travels are unknown. However, through communication and observation, it is concluded that the entity can alter reality or the laws of physics to a small degree. To date, no full imagery of SCP-6983 accurately shows its features or profile due to bad lighting. Civilian observations of the anomaly have described it as a sudden blinking in space, an intense light, or a combination of both. Research is currently ongoing. Addendum 6983.1: Discovery On 16 August 2017, a probe from the Beholder line observed blinking on a planetary ring in its vicinity2. Its trajectory was adjusted for further investigation. Thermal imaging managed to discern a humanoid figure. Communication attempts were initiated soon after. However, upon maneuvering closer, Binary Star uncovered that the entity was trying to communicate via a system functioning similarly to Morse code. Following several days of reviewing footage, decoding, and sending Morse code to the anomaly, a legible method of conversation was successfully established on 23 August after SCP-6983 signaled "I think I finally understand you". Log available below: Interviewed: SCP-6983 Interviewer: Dr. Nails Foreword: All messages are decrypted from Morse. <BEGIN LOG> Dr. Nails: Can you please confirm that you understand me? SCP-6983 points one of his fingers towards the probe, a dim white light appears. SCP-6983: Yes, I do. Dr. Nails: Would you mind answering some questions? SCP-6983: I have no problem with that, but are you by chance from Earth? Dr. Nails: Can I ask why you assume that? SCP-6983: I've been asked to repair a similar object you're currently using, I believe a probe called Beholder-8, by someone we both know. Dr. Nails: I see. So you know, how do I put this, the bigger context of the situation? SCP-6983: I know who you are and what you do, but that's about it. Dr. Nails: Well, that makes things a bit easier. Can I start my questioning? SCP-6983: If you don't mind, could you please wait a few moments? I'm almost done here. Dr. Nails: Sure. SCP-6983 welds a torn section of the ring of the nearby planet together, despite it being made out of mainly gas. Dr. Nails: My heat sensors didn't pick up what you just did, could you elaborate? SCP-6983: Heat sensors? Of course you don't pick anything up, unlike the others I use extreme cold. SCP-6983 begins to weld again. Despite the temperature, the area around it seemingly begins to bend like hot air. Dr. Nails: According to what you're doing, you are bending the laws of physics, a small bit of reality. Effectively, you're going below zero Kelvin, the absolute zero. SCP-6983: Kelvin? That's a nice name. But you make it seem like it is something good. Dr. Nails: Isn't it? SCP-6983: I was cast out by the rest since I could not produce high temperatures. I couldn't weld stars or other hot layers or objects together. In the beginning I could not even travel like them. Dr. Nails: How did they travel? SCP-6983: As you probably saw the air, no excuse me, the vacuum bend around me. They first utilized that effect to shorten distances temporarily to fold space on itself. It took me quite a while to do the same but based on something cold. Dr. Nails: First? So they found another way to travel? SCP-6983: Yes, after a while they just learned to burn a hole in space, step through it, and weld it back afterwards. I am not able to do something like that. That's the moment where they abandoned me, even though they could have easily let me step through as well. Dr. Nails: Have you seen them again? SCP-6983: No. Pauses. First I thought they generated a heat so hot they travelled to some new dimension or some other reality breaking phenomenon, but later I heard they were asked to fix some kind of broken planet and… something went wrong. Footage reveals that at this moment SCP-6983 trembled, its light flickered, and succeeded in making a small hole in space. Dr. Nails: Like an accident on the job? SCP-6983: Probably, I genuinely don't know. Dr. Nails: So what are you going to do? SCP-6983: I'm gonna try to piece everything together. Bit by bit. Dr. Nails: Ok, and how do- Hey, wait! SCP-6983 takes note of the hole, stands up, tears the hole further open, and begins to step through. SCP-6983: Seems like I finally will be able to do this… You have my thanks. I'll make sure to return the favour. Dr. Nails: Where are you going? Can you spare a little more time? SCP-6983: Space is both continuously expanding and collapsing on itself. I need to hold a couple of things together. Wouldn't like things to start falling apart. We'll meet again from time to time. Don't worry about it. SCP-6983 welds the hole shut. Some small crystals linger around before fading away. <END LOG> Closing Statement: Several phenomena related to SCP-6983 are currently being researched by physicists. The probe was brought back to its normal trajectory. Update: On 19 September 2017, a notification was sent from Beholder-8 as it had started its reconfiguration. Sensors showed that its exterior was colder than before it lost its function. Addendum 6983.2: On 22 February 2018, a Foundation satellite observed a blue shine in the atmosphere. Whilst this phenomenon lasted, several locations reported unexpected snowfall. Afterwards the satellite concluded that the hole in the ozone layer was nowhere to be found and a small section was signed with the name "Kelvin". Image from 22 february 2018 Footnotes 1. Anomaly cannot be contained, but does not need to be contained. 2. Any object that was observable without significant enhancements, filters, or activation of more than 60% of all lenses was treaded as close proximity for this particular probe.

SCP-914 is a large clockwork device weighing several tons and covering an area of eighteen square meters, consisting of screw drives, belts, pulleys, gears, springs and other clockwork.

*** Item #: SCP-914 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: Only personnel who submit a formal request and receive approval from site command may operate 914. SCP-914 is to be kept in research cell 109-B with two guard personnel on duty at all times. Any researchers entering 109-B are to be accompanied by at least one guard for the entirety of testing. A full list of tests to be carried out must be given to all guard personnel on duty; any deviation from this list will result in termination of testing, forcible removal of personnel from 109-B, and formal discipline at site command’s discretion. WARNING: At this time, no testing of biological matter is allowed. Refer to document 109-B:117. Applying the “Rough” setting to explosive materials is not advised. Description: SCP-914 is a large clockwork device weighing several tons and covering an area of eighteen square meters, consisting of screw drives, belts, pulleys, gears, springs and other clockwork. It is incredibly complex, consisting of over eight million moving parts comprised mostly of tin and copper, with some wooden and cloth items observed. Observation and probing have showed no electronic assemblies or any form of power other than the “Mainspring” under the “Selection Panel”. Two large booths 3mx2.1mx2.1m (10ftx7ftx7ft) are connected via copper tubes to the main body of SCP-914, labeled “Intake” and “Output”. Between them is a copper panel with a large knob with a small arrow attached. The words Rough, Coarse, 1:1, Fine, and Very Fine are positioned at points around the knob. Below the knob is a large “key” that winds the “mainspring”. When an object is placed in the Intake Booth, a door slides shut, and a small bell sounds. If the knob is turned to any position and the key wound up, SCP-914 will “refine” the object in the booth. No energy is lost in the process, and the object appears to be in stasis until the Output Booth door is opened. Intense observation and testing have not shown how SCP-914 accomplishes this, and no test object has ever been observed inside SCP-914 during the “refining” process. The process takes between five and ten minutes, depending on the size of the object being refined. Addendum: 5/14: Dr. █████ Test Log Input: 1kg of steel (setting: Rough) Output: Pile of steel chunks of various sizes, appearing to be cut by laser. Input: 1kg of steel (setting: 1:1) Output: 1kg of steel screws Input: 1kg of steel (setting: Fine) Output: 1kg of steel carpet tacks Input: 1kg of steel (setting: Very Fine) Output: Several gases that dissipated into the air quickly, and 1 gram of an unknown metal, resistant to heat of 50,000 degrees, impossible to bend or break with any force, and a near-perfect (1.6x10-75 ρ) conductor of electricity Input: 1 wristwatch belonging to Dr. █████ (setting: Coarse) Output: 1 completely disassembled wristwatch Input: 1 cellphone belonging to ███████ (setting: 1:1) Output: 1 cellphone, although different make and model Input: 1 standard Colt Python revolver (setting: Very Fine) Output: [DATA EXPUNGED] Aforementioned ████████████ completely disintegrated all matter in its line of fire. Object contained with high density gamma waves. Input: 1 white mouse (setting: 1:1) Output: 1 brown mouse Input: 1 chimp (setting: Fine) Output: [DATA EXPUNGED] Input: 1 chimp (setting: Rough) Output: Badly mutilated corpse, showing signs of crushing and cutting with high heat Document # 109-B:117: Dr.███ and Dr.███████ Test Log Input: Subject D-186, male Caucasian, 42 years old, 108kg, 185cm tall. (setting: 1:1) Output: Male Hispanic, 42 years old, 100kg, 188cm tall. Subject was very confused and agitated. Subject attacked security personnel. Subject terminated. Input: Subject D-187, male Caucasian, 28 years old, 63kg, 173cm tall. (setting: Very Fine) Output: [DATA EXPUNGED]. Subject escaped from test chamber, killing eight guards as well as Dr.███ and Dr.███████. Lockdown initiated. Subject causes containment failure of three SCP areas in continued escape attempt. Special response team engages subject, resulting in severe wounding of subject, partial memory loss in special response team members and corrosive damage to plumbing. Subject expired several hours later, dissolving into blue ash and blinding nearby research team. Biological testing with SCP-914 discontinued. Note: "Because of the nature of this SCP a wide range of test data would be helpful. Dr. Gears has ordered that any researcher can have access for non-biological testing if they themselves are or they are supervised by a Level 3 researcher. All testing is to be recorded in file #914-E (Experiment Log 914). Biological testing will continue only with prior clearance by 05 Command. As long as you want to try something mundane that isn't alive feel free to help accumulate data." - Dr. █████

SCP-6902 is a red rolling suitcase that lacks any form of branding or iconography.

*** Item#: 6902 Level2 Containment Class: euclid Secondary Class: none Disruption Class: dark Risk Class: notice link to memo Special Containment Procedures: SCP-6902 contains a tracking device. At all times, at least one Foundation agent is to wait at the baggage claim in Newark Liberty International Airport. Whenever SCP-6902 appears in this baggage claim, said agent is to take it to a secluded location until it dematerializes. In the event that an unknown party claims SCP-6902, the identity of said party is to be determined as soon as possible. Description: SCP-6902 is a red rolling suitcase that lacks any form of branding or iconography. Approximately every six hours, SCP-6902 will dematerialize from its current location and rematerialize within a baggage claim carousel at Newark Liberty International Airport. Upon discovery, SCP-6902 had a baggage tag identifying it as belonging to flight 1814 from PHX1 to EWR2, on January 12th 2004. Notably, this flight crashed due to a mechanical failure, killing all passengers on board. This baggage tag has since been removed. As SCP-6902 dematerializes, all items within it will become an SCP-6902-1 instance. Whenever SCP-6902 materializes, all SCP-6902-1 instances will materialize within it as well. The following list comprises all SCP-6902-1 instances: Five long sleeved dress shirts; A pair of dress shoes; Three neckties; Seven pairs of underwear; Four pairs of dress socks; A pair of sunglasses; A black leather belt; A disposable camera; A toiletries kit; An empty leather folder; A gift bag containing a stuffed bear. The following message is embroidered on the inside of SCP-6902 itself. "For Jason. You won't lose this one." Footnotes 1. IATA airport code for Phoenix Sky Harbor International Airport 2. IATA airport code for Newark Liberty International Airport

SCP-3418 is a phenomenon occurring in the ███ River in [REDACTED], China.

*** Item #: SCP-3418 Object Class: Keter Special Containment Procedures: SCP-3418 is contained onsite at Outpost-3418. Personnel assigned to Outpost-3418 are required to rotate out every two consecutive weeks, with staggered terms. Personnel must be observed by at least one other staff member while sleeping, without exception. Personnel are to maintain constant surveillance of the ███ River, and must retrieve instances of SCP-3418-1 on sight, unless SCP-3418-2 is present. Personnel are to remain at least 20m from SCP-3418-2 at all times, and must not attempt interaction with the entity at any time, for any reason. Upon identifying instances of SCP-3418-1, the individual's family (or present living company) will be located and administered Class-A amnestics, misdirecting them to believe that the person in question was killed in a mundane manner. Five instances of SCP-3418-1 will be held for research purposes; the remainder are to be incinerated. + Verify 3/3418 Clearance - 3/3418 Clearance Verified The Foundation is in contact with the Chinese government, with a joint effort to prevent civilian movement into and out of the area. To prevent suspicion regarding mass disappearances, the 40km area surrounding SCP-3418 must be saturated with a Class-B amnestic aerosol on a monthly basis. The local populace is to be monitored for adverse effects from the frequency of amnestic treatment. For each instance of SCP-3418-1 discovered, one D-Class personnel shall be apportioned for Outpost-3418 to ensure that the human presence within SCP-3418's area of influence remains at 200 persons or greater.1 Description: SCP-3418 is a phenomenon occurring in the ███ River in [REDACTED], China. SCP-3418-1 are complete, recently deceased human remains which spontaneously manifest within a 700m section of the ███ River. In all cases where SCP-3418-1 have been identified, they have corresponded to reports of missing persons within a 40km area surrounding SCP-3418. These reports share a commonality in that the victim was abducted while asleep, with no witnesses. The cause of death for SCP-3418-1 is unknown. SCP-3418-1 exhibit abnormal decomposition and are not consumed by microbial, insect or animal life, enabling them to remain well-preserved without external assistance. In contrast to the comprehensive cell death in all other tissues, the central nervous system of SCP-3418-1 remain alive and fully functional despite lack of oxygen and vital nutrients, and is capable of surviving indefinitely. Due to the complete lack of activity in the peripheral nervous system, sensory organs and other systems, all attempts to communicate with or determine the level of consciousness (if any) in SCP-3418-1 have failed. Electroencephalogram and functional neurological imaging demonstrate high levels of activity. SCP-3418-2 is a massive aquatic entity which sporadically manifests within the area of SCP-3418. The entity resembles Bagarius yarrelli (Goonch or Giant Devil Catfish), and is selectively intangible, rendering it immune to physical damage or capture. SCP-3418-2 possesses intricate, faintly luminescent markings over its entire body. Additionally, its eyes are absent, the orifices instead filled with pale green, opaque gemstones which emit faint light. Undisturbed, SCP-3418-2 preys exclusively upon SCP-3418-1, swallowing the latter rapidly and whole. If interrupted, SCP-3418-2 will attack and consume the responsible party, if possible. SCP-3418-2 produces small amounts of neutron radiation, and generates substantial Cherenkov radiation when manifesting or vanishing. Addendum [3418-001]: Timeline of SCP-3418 Discovery & Containment 28/04/20██: Reports initially surface regarding human remains in the ███ River, in [REDACTED] China. Situation is minimally monitored by local Foundation assets, due to lack of evidence for anomalous involvement. 02/05/20██: Coroner's report detailing abnormalities in the four recovered human remains is intercepted by Foundation personnel. Recovered items are appropriated by the Foundation, as are several newly discovered remains in the ███ River. Identity of the deceased successfully traced to missing persons in the [REDACTED] area. 07/05/20██: Initial sighting of massive aquatic organism in the ███ River. Initial reports are unsubstantiated, but monitored closely by Foundation personnel due to proximity to another suspected anomaly. 11/05/20██: Seven further human remains are discovered in the ███ River. Anomaly upgraded from Extranormal Event classification and designated SCP-3418. Exploration initiative authorized. 15/05/20██: Aquatic entity (now designated SCP-3418-2) encountered by Foundation exploration team. SCP-3418-2 successfully contained and transported to [REDACTED] 17/05/20██: SCP-3418-2 containment failure. 21/05/20██: SCP-3418-2 successfully contained and transported to [REDACTED] 22/05/20██: SCP-3418-2 containment failure. Two personnel lost during breach. 25/05/20██: Attempt made to destroy SCP-3418-2. Attempt failed. 28/05/20██: Attempt made to destroy SCP-3418-2. Attempt failed. 31/05/20██: Attempt made to destroy SCP-3418-2. Attempt failed. 01/06/20██: Containment analysis of SCP-3418. Fourteen sets of human remains (now designated SCP-3418-1) are secured by Foundation personnel. Projections do not indicate viable long-term covert containment. Preparations begin for depopulation protocol. 06/06/20██: Depopulation protocol 85% successful. [DATA EXPUNGED] 16/06/20██: No further anomalous activity observed. SCP-3418 declared Neutralized. 22/06/20██: Reports of SCP-3418-1 discovered originating from a separate section of the ███ River, [REDACTED] from the original site. 25/06/20██: Reports of SCP-3418-1 substantiated. SCP-3418-2 identified. [DATA EXPUNGED] 01/07/20██: Present containment procedures devised. Construction of Outpost-3418 begins. Addendum [3418-002]: Recovered Materials The first four instances of SCP-3418-1 were later confirmed to be members of Huǒjù zhi Zi.2 Materials recovered from the homes of the individuals in question were obtained and examined to provide insight into the nature of SCP-3418. Two relevant excerpts from the appropriated documentation are transcribed and translated below: Shadow is born from light. Darkness is born from nothing. ██████ is darkness. ██████ swims in the vast and empty sea between light and shadow. ██████ eats the flame of life. Flames swallowed by the darkness may never rejoin the Father. They drown forever. ███ ███ █████ (Date of quotation unknown, possibly ████ BCE, approximately) ██████ came from the sea of dreams. ██████ came through the sea of stars. ██████ came to the sea of our shores. It grasped our people in their sleep and drew them into its waters. I saw the pale flesh of our people. It was a lifeless prison for their flames. They were motionless. They could only wait to be devoured. When ██████ opened its maw to consume our people, a light pierced the sky. Night became day. Three hands reached out and engulfed ██████ in a vast blaze, casting it back into the darkness. ██ ██ ███ (Date of quotation unknown, possibly ████ BCE, approximately) This is the testament of our actions. Glory to the Radiant Father. ██████ hungers, and it eats without restraint. The Radiant Father slumbers. He cannot help us. He cannot save us. We must destroy ██████. Just as we are dreams in the sea of ██████, we shall make ██████ a dream in the sea of us. We shall anchor it to flesh with the sacred stones and expose it to the true flame. ███ ██ ██████ (Written 25/4/19██) Addendum [3418-003]: Classified Records + Verify 3/3418 Clearance - 3/3418 Clearance Verified 06/06/20██: Depopulation protocol 85% successful. Remaining populace sterilized using Contingency-170-Kasuf. 28/06/20██: Area depopulated until 265 persons remain, which are retained to ensure localized containment of the phenomenon. Rates of SCP-3418-1 appear to increase at a linear rate with the populace of the surrounding area, suggesting that effective containment might be achieved by maintaining a small local population. Observation of containment efficacy begins. 30/06/20██: One agent lost during the night and later recovered as an instance of SCP-3418-1. Observations of SCP-3418-2 note a marked decrease in size when compared to its original manifestation. Reason for this change is unknown, but is speculated to result from the smaller depth and breadth of the river in comparison to the original site. Addendum [3418-004]: Event-3418-Shēnyuān + Verify 4/3418 Clearance - Clearance 4/3418 Verified On 12/2/20██, a commercial fishing vessel in the South China Sea (1█.████° N, 11█.████° E) investigated what was initially believed to be a sonar malfunction, discovering what is presumed to be an aquatic organism of immense proportions. Observation of the entity only persisted for approximately fifteen minutes until contact was lost, however, the crew reported seeing luminescent markings and massive, pale green "eyes." Approximate longitudinal size of the entity based on eyewitness accounts and recovered instrument data is over 200m. The crew was administered Class-A amnestics following interrogation and appropriation of instrument data. Photograph appropriated from Event-3418-Shēnyuān. Content and context unknown. Analysis of recovered data later revealed a second abnormality. During the period of contact with the entity, the vessel's sonar system could not detect the ocean floor, despite the relatively shallow depth of the region in question. The data remains under study. Footnotes 1. Complete conversion to D-Class personnel estimated to occur by 20██. 2. A Chinese occultist collective based on the beliefs of [REDACTED], and possibly engaged in conflict with the Xia Anomalous Culture Group.

SCP-6068 is a subterranean complex whose entrance is located on Zhokhov Island1 in the East Siberian Sea.

*** Item #: SCP-6068 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: Due to the harsh local climate, permanent patrol of SCP-6068 is not advised. The SCPS Shurale will remain stationed in the vicinity of the De Long Islands in the event of perimeter sensors signalling unauthorized entry. Though attempts to fill SCP-6068's entrance with concrete have failed for unknown reasons, this course of action is to be continued until the site can be confirmed fully inaccessible. Whether or not the end result of said operation will be confirmable is currently unknown. Description: SCP-6068 is a subterranean complex whose entrance is located on Zhokhov Island1 in the East Siberian Sea. Due to an unknown phenomenon, concepts related to or contained within SCP-6068 are extremely difficult to fully understand. This phenomenon is also believed to be responsible for heavy interference and distortion of audio and visual signals sent from inside the complex by exploration teams. The date or purpose of SCP-6068's construction, as well as who constructed it, is currently not known. The full extent of SCP-6068's interior is also unknown, and all exploration teams sent into it are presumed lost and unrecoverable. If previous logs are to be believed, no living being has ever been encountered within SCP-6068. + Addendum: Exploration Log 606808062021 - Close Addendum Foreword: On 01/06/2021, Mobile Task Force Digamma-152 was dispatched on an exploration mission inside SCP-6068. Though there is confusion regarding the exact details of previous exploration missions, no previous exploration team or individual had to date returned from SCP-6068. Thus, the MTF was equipped with state-of-the-art survival gear, a month's rations and a protoype McPherson-Engelhart Emergency Translocator (MEET) device3. Team Members: Alpha (leader), Beta, Gamma, Epsilon Additional Information: This transcript was compiled from audio and visual logs recorded by all team members as well as offshore command stationed on the SCPS Shurale. Effort has been made to verify all events, with unequal success. [BEGIN LOG, 00:07] Alpha: Command, do you read? We have reached the entrance. Command: Alpha, we read you. Final equipment check, copy. Alpha: Copy. Beta: Copy. Gamma: Copy. Delta: Copy. Epsilon: Copy. [00:18] Alpha: Proceeding into the anomaly. Epsilon, how's the door? Epsilon: Don't think charges will be needed, Sarge. [The door to the facility is opened without incident. The team move into what appears to be a security checkpoint, unmanned. There is a symbol on the wall that is repeatedly visible through the exploration of the complex. Its meaning is currently unknown. (See Addendum 6068.02.)] Gamma: Place seems weirdly familiar somehow. Alpha: Don't let your guard down. Command, only path available is double doors straight ahead. Command: Proceed. [The team proceeds to the doors, which open automatically. The team steps inside a room with equal dimensions on all sides. All members turn to face the doors as they close.] [00:27] Beta: I think… I think something's wrong. Should we maybe push the button? Alpha: Huh. Yeah. [00:31] Epsilon: Hey, Sarge, what do you reckon these are? [Alpha reaches toward the wall and manipulates an unidentifiable object. The room begins to descend. When the descent stops, the team makes egress via unknown means.] Alpha: All right, stay sharp, team. Chances for major fan-shit combo increase here on out. Command: Alpha, do you copy? We lost all signal for a bit there. Alpha: I copy, command. Had some trouble with a. Gamma: The lights are on, but literally no one's home. Alpha: Communication's going to be spotty, you're cutting in and out as it is. Command: Roger. Proceed. [The team moves down the path ahead of them, stopping to make unknown marks at uneven intervals. Content or meaning of these marks have yet to be verified4. Alpha: Not seeing much of note, Command. Just the same thing over and over again. Hey, Delta, what are those called? Delta: [content lost] Gamma: The lights are on, but literally no one's home. Delta: You can look in them. I see something here. [Unknown visual feed shows view of a pile of bones in another place.] Beta: Feels like I should be feeling something about this, you know? But I can't remember what. Or how. Alpha: All right. All right. Umm… Break out Class W's. [The team pauses to consume amnestics.] [00:41] Epsilon: Does this place seem familiar to you? Beta: I don't know, should it? Gamma: Familiar… Alpha: Not sure what you mean by that. Epsilon: Yeah, me neither. Alpha: Continue ahead. [The team continues ahead. The path is a clean, spotless, sterile white. Intersection appears.] Beta: Head that way? Epsilon: What about this way? Alpha: There's four of us. Let's split up. We'll cover more ground. Delta: There's no way that's a good idea. I learned that in. Delta: There's four of us. Let's split up. We'll cover more ground. All Team Members: The lights are on but literally no one's home. Direct communication with command is lost. Video split into multiple sources, choppy and frequently incoherent. Transcript from this point consists of notable segments when possible. [01:14] Beta: Why am I here? What am I doing? What is all this stuff? Hello? Anyone there? Goddammit, I don't know anything about this. [Beta begins shucking gear.] Beta: I don't even know what this is. I'm out of here, fuck this. [Signal lost.] [02:45] [Gamma is seen attempting unsuccessfully to activate the MEET device. Attempts grow more frantic over the next fifteen minutes of video.] Gamma: Really wish I knew what this thing was. Unknown: [unintelligible] Gamma: Wish I knew why I was so desperate to get it to work. Unknown: [distant moaning] Gamma: Dammit. [03:19] [No content.] [07:14] [Two unknown individuals face each other in a corridor.] Unknown: Who are you? [Subjects speak in unison, with matching gestures.] Unknown: Who are you? Who am I? [Subjects are not otherwise physically identical. Possibility of either belonging to MTF Digamma-15 currently under review.] Subject 1: God, where is this? Subject 2: Where are you? Subject 1: Where are either of us? [Unknown.] [08:99] [Gunshot.] [10:51] [View is believed to be from body cam of team member Epsilon5. Subject is panting while running down a white corridor. Every so often, they pass through an intersection identical to the one discovered by the team earlier in the exploration6. Epsilon does not deviate from straight path7. The time between intersection appearances gradually decreases8.] [12:10] Delta: Something goes in here. [Subject is walking along a corridor, running their fingers over the portholes.] Delta: Something else goes in here. [There is no end to the portholes in the corridor.] Delta: I wonder which one I go in. [There is no end.] [15:53] [Gunshot.] [Gunshot.] [Gunshot.] [Silence.] [18:51] [Two people sit in a place with no conceivable entrance or exit. They show signs of extreme malnourishment and growth of facial hair consistent with lack of personal hygiene routines over the course of multiple months.] Delta: Hey. Gamma: Yeah? Delta: Do you remember… Gamma: Remember what? [19:29] Delta: Anything. [Subject begins to shake.] Gamma: No. [Subjects' corporeal forms blur to a smudge on the video feed. Feed continues for unknown length of time.] [00:00:00] Alpha: I am Alpha. [Alpha is alone.] Alpha: I am Alpha. [There is no human life present.] Alpha: Alpha. Alpha: Alpha. Alpha: I am Alpha. Alpha: Alpha. [Feed continues in this manner for an indeterminate period before terminating.] [Gunshot.] [25:32] [Team member Epsilon is visible through a transparent porthole. Subject is sitting alone in an otherwise empty place. Telemetry shows the MEET device has been activated. Whereabouts of device cannot be determined from telemetry or video feed.] [Epsilon regards the camera feed with a placid smile.] [Over the next eight minutes, camera view pans back slowly, showing the porthole is contained in a surface that is otherwise clean, spotless, sterile white. Gamma's face remains visible and still for the entire time. Nearby the porthole is a placard with two words printed on it, unintelligible.] [Camera cuts to black, showing the symbol encountered by exploration team at the start of the feed.] [No further content.] - Close Addendum The MEET device was found 07/06/2021 in the command center located on board the SCPS Shurale. Transported along with it were the above recordings and Alpha's dog tags. No sign exists that any member of the team survived the operation. Addendum 6068.02 + Video still of symbol frequently seen on interior walls of SCP-6068 - Due to heavy distortion, content of image not currently understood Update 08/06/2021: Per O5 command9, future exploration of SCP-6068 is discontinued. Footnotes 1. Остров Жохова 2. Designation lost 3. Produced by an experimental program researching quick-transport solutions to allow task forces to withdraw safely from dangerous circumstances. 4. Unclear if this is due to interference with recording equipment or team members being compromised. 5. Unconfirmed 6. Unconfirmed 7. Unconfirmed 8. Unconfirmed 9. Final vote 11-2

SCP-3289 is a standard 4A sheet of letter paper.

*** Item #: SCP-3289 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-3289 is to be kept in a standard secure locker with constant monitoring to detect anomalies in behavior. Only Level 2 or higher personnel are authorized to remove it from its containment. Copies of SCP-3289 are to be stored away in a secure cabinet. Personnel should request permission before testing on SCP-3289. Description: SCP-3289 is a standard 4A sheet of letter paper. The sheet of paper is unable to be altered until it replicates. Every 4-5 minutes, a hand drawn cartoon face will appear, with eyes, mouth and sometimes nose appearing. The appearance of the faces vary, with numerous different emotions being portrayed, the detail varying from simple to complex. Investigation has revealed that the faces are drawn with a thick graphite tool, though the tool has yet to be seen. SCP-3289 will continue to produce the faces until the page is full on both sides of the paper, upon which a separate piece of blank paper will appear underneath the current sheet1. The original sheet does not display any further anomalous properties and can be torn, erased, burned, etc.. The new sheet will continue to produce the faces until the process repeats. SCP-3289 has yet to stop replicating itself, with ███ copies in possession of the Foundation2. SCP-3289 has some sense of its surrounding, as it has been able to react to nearby beings, creating different faces in response to the nearby creature. The emotions portrayed do not come from the creature, instead appearing as the emotion that SCP-3289 holds toward the creature. Addendum 3289-A: Recovery of SCP-3289 (██/██/19██) SCP-3289 was found in the ███████ Asylum, which treated numerous insane patients. Patient #████ was a 67 year old mute and deaf man being treated by Doctor ████ who was, according to staff at the Asylum, portrayed his emotions through writing faces on pieces of paper. This was the main way Doctor ████ communicated with the patient, learning a new language that was made out of purely drawn cartoon faces. During an incident in which a violent patient broke out, Patient #████ was killed, as well as 4 others. Staff of the Asylum recovered Patient #████'s paper, which Doctor ████, the patient's personal doctor as well as close friend, hung up on his office wall. The doctor began to report faces appearing on the paper, which he recognized as the ones that Patient #████ used to draw. This incident was reported in the local newspaper as a "haunted paper," gaining the attention of Foundation personnel. Amnestics were administered throughout the Asylum and the paper, now designated as SCP-3289, was extracted. Addendum 3289-B: Research Log + Research Logs - Research Logs Date: ██/██/19██ Researcher: Dr. █████ Stimulus: Canine (German Shepard) Reaction: 5 minutes after the dog was first brought in, a face was drawn which expressed an extremely joyous emotion, drawn with heavy detail compared to previous faces. It is believed that this detailed image is the face of Patient #████. Once the dog was removed, a face was drawn which expressed sadness and apparent loneliness, again with heavy detail. Note: It is believed that the detailed images portray the original face of Patient #████. Date: ██/██/19██ Researcher: Dr. █████ Stimulus: Feline Reaction: 5 minutes after the cat was first brought in, a face was drawn which expressed discomfort. This reaction stayed this way, with various changes in the faces, for 10 minutes until the cat was removed from the cell. Another face was drawn 5 minutes after removal that expressed gratitude. Note: SCP-3289 seems to hold the same attitude toward cats that Patient #███ had, who was allergic to cats according to Asylum records. Date: ██/██/19██ Researcher: Dr. █████ Stimulus: 5 year old female child Reaction: 5 minutes after the child was first brought in, a face was drawn which expressed sadness, drawn with heavy detail, similar to the previous log. SCP-3289 remained unresponsive for 10 minutes after the child was removed before it began its usual cycle. Note: SCP-3289's reaction could be connected to the reason why Patient #████ was in the Asylum. Further investigation is required. Patient #████ had a niece before being escorted to the Asylum. Date: ██/██/19██ Researcher: Dr. █████ Stimulus: Presence of Dr. █████ Reaction: Dr. █████ was alone with SCP-3289 when a face was drawn that had eyes looking directly at the doctor, a wide smile on its face. Dr. █████ stayed in the room for 5 more minutes, upon which a face was drawn similarly. It did this for 15 more minutes, the eyes tracking the doctor no matter his position, until Dr. █████ left the room, which SCP-3289 responded to with a face of disappointment. Note: SCP-3289 appears to have positive emotions toward Dr. █████. This could be due to Patient #████'s previous relation with their doctor at the Asylum, and SCP-3289 made a connection with Dr. █████. Date: ██/██/19██ Researcher: Dr. ███ Stimulus: Presence of Dr. ███ Reaction: Dr. ███ stayed in the containment chamber for 5 minutes when a face was drawn on SCP-3289, which portrayed confusion. 5 minutes afterwards, a new face portrayed extreme anger, heavily detailed. This face continued to be drawn when Dr. ███ was in the room, with proportions growing larger until the angry face covered the entire page, upon which Dr. ███ was escorted out of the room. Note: SCP-3289 reacts extremely when confronted with a replacement doctor to Dr. █████. In order to remove the risk of potential hostility, Dr. █████ will continue to be the head researcher of SCP-3289. Date: ██/██/19██ Researcher: Dr. █████ Stimulus: Verbal Communication Reaction: SCP-3289 did not react when Dr. █████ attempted to talk to it. Instead, it continued portraying various emotions, mainly excitement (likely due to the presence of Dr. █████) until 25 minutes in a face expressed annoyance at the experiment. Experiment was aborted. Note: SCP-3289 shares the deafness of Patient #████ before his death. Any further verbal communication wielded similar results. Date: ██/██/19██ Researcher: Dr. █████ Stimulus: Written Communication Reaction: Dr. █████ wrote on a paper facing SCP-3289. First he used written English, to which SCP-3289 reacted with a face of confusion. Other languages provided similar results. Dr. █████ then used faces similar to the ones on SCP-3289, portraying a face asking questions. SCP-3289 reacted with a face of understanding, though it is unknown if SCP-3289 could tell what Dr. █████ was asking. Note: SCP-3289 does not appear to understand English or any written language. Researchers are currently looking for a way to ask SCP-3289 questions through the same sort of faces it uses. Addendum 3289-C: Asylum Logs Patient Record: + Patient #████ Record - Patient #████ Record Name: R████ ██████ | Patient #: ████ Age: 67 | Height: 172.72 cm | Weight: 60.78 kg | Sex: Male Current Physician/Doctor: Doctor ████ Reason for Residence: Was found unable to communicate efficiently with those around him. Family urged the asylum to let the patient stay in order to heal him. Medical History: Patient is deaf and mute. He suffers joint pains regularly. Patient frequently has memory issues; possibly dementia. Notable allergy of cats. Special Notes: Patient uses faces drawn on paper to communicate and convey emotion. Has so far not shown ability to speak. Doctors are to draw faces on paper to communicate with the patient. Interview Log: + Patient #████ Interview Log - Patient #████ Interview Log Foreword: Doctor ████ was interviewing Patient #████ by drawing faces. Doctor ████ vocalizes what he draws to help viewers to understand what is going on. <Begin Log> Doctor ████: Hello Patient #████. (Sits down in chair, opposite to one Patient is sitting in.) Patient #████: (Draws several excited faces on paper.) Doctor ████: I'm glad you're excited to see me. (Takes a piece of paper and draws a smiling face.) Patient #████: (Looks at face and draws a smiling face back. Then draws a questioning face.) Doctor ████: I'm going to ask you some questions. (Draws a face talking with a question mark in a speech bubble.) Patient #████: (Draws a nodding face, then waits.) Doctor ████: Tell me… who is in your family? (Draws various faces with arrows connecting them all.) Patient #████: (Hesitates before drawing the following faces: A grown woman [likely daughter], a small child [likely niece], and a grown man [likely son-in-law]. Then draws numerous sad faces around the picture.) Doctor ████: I see. (Draws a face with large eyes.) You're sad about your family? (Draws a sad face with an arrow pointing in the direction of Patient #████.) Patient #████: (Draws a nodding face. Then continues to draw faces on paper silently until paper fills up. Patient then takes another piece of paper from a stack nearby and continues drawing faces.) Doctor ████: Patient #████? (Draws a confused face pointing at Patient.) Patient #████: (Ignores Doctor ████ and continues drawing faces.) Doctor ████: (Stands up and pats Patient #████ on the back before leaving. Patient draws a smiling face before continuing drawing faces.) <End Log> Footnotes 1. Sheet can appear on any surface the original is placed on. 2. Using copies of SCP-3289 for scrap paper is prohibited in case the current SCP-3289 is to be used and potentially misplaced.

SCP-1268 is a human male of indeterminate race with brown eyes and black hair.

*** Item #: SCP-1268 Object Class: Safe-exsequi Special Containment Procedures: SCP-1268 is to be kept in a standard humanoid containment cell and fed regularly. The room is to be monitored by one guard at all times. In the event of a containment breach, security personnel are required to detain SCP-1268 alive if at all possible; however, if personnel deem SCP-1268 an imminent risk, they are permitted to dispose of it by any means necessary. Description: SCP-1268 is a human male of indeterminate race with brown eyes and black hair. While SCP-1268 is capable of basic motor functions and self-maintenance, it does not appear to be capable of communication, nor does it show signs of emotion or higher intelligence. It is currently believed to be nonsapient; however, it has demonstrated the ability to use stairs, door handles, and elevators. When left to its own devices, SCP-1268 will wander aimlessly until it is in proximity to a large group of people1; in these situations, SCP-1268 will go into the crowd and slowly move through it. During this process, the behavior of those in the group will be altered in a predictable manner: 0 min to 2 min: No effects are visible. 2 min to 7 min: Persons in the crowd are visibly nervous, turning their heads frequently and moving more quickly than before SCP-1268 entered the crowd. 7 min to 14 min: Persons other than SCP-1268 begin to experience disorientation and confusion. Some will actively attempt to exit the crowd, although most will continue with whatever activities they were participating in. 14 min forward: Almost all persons in the crowd panic and attempt to leave the area by any means necessary. Subjects affected this way show a distinct lack of concern for the safety of themselves and others. Anomalous effects will cease after SCP-1268 is no longer in the crowd. The danger of SCP-1268 varies with group size, group density, accessibility of exits, and size of exits. On average, 30% of all persons in a group that has been affected by SCP-1268 will be killed from being trampled or from interpersonal violence. A further 35% will suffer injuries of various severity. SCP-1268 will remain unharmed and show no apparent reaction to the event. Addendum: A review of available footage has found that, when in a crowd for fourteen minutes or more, SCP-1268 will exhibit a behavior that may or may not be laughter. Footnotes 1. Due to the inherent expense of testing SCP-1268’s capabilities, the exact group size and conditions necessary to trigger SCP-1268’s anomalous effects is unknown. The phenomenon has been observed to occur in groups as small as 35.

SCP-3654 is a possibly alternate version of the PT-658, a World War 2 era motor torpedo boat.

*** Items found within its cabin should be documented but left undisturbed. Before SCP-3654's projected disappearance, munitions and rations are to be placed on the boat. Personnel who wish to add extra-dimensional sensors to the vessel should speak with the current project supervisor. Description: SCP-3654 is a possibly alternate version of the PT-658, a World War 2 era motor torpedo boat. The vessel displays wear consistent with several decades of continuous use. The interior of SCP-3654 has living quarters for eight men, with the remaining bunks turned into additional storage areas. Personal effects within the vessel indicate it is crewed by American soldiers, however the language present on the written documents and signage is in an as of yet undecipherable language. Maps found in the captain's quarters indicate SCP-3654 is or was part of an invasion force planned for mainland Japan. The primary anomalous trait of the vessel is a cycle of existence and non-existence, each lasting for approximately 29 days. When SCP-3654 disappears, no living organic matter will transport with it. On multiple occasions, it has shown to be capable of autonomous movement without the use of its engines. SCP-3654 was first discovered in 1978 by a civilian science vessel that was exploring the Bonin Islands. At the time, it was heavily damaged, with two of the three engines out of commission. The vessel was covered in makeshift camouflage that was composed of packed mud and decaying plant matter. An initial analysis of SCP-3654 revealed a significant amount of crushed or broken timepieces and clocks sitting on a pile of partially burnt calendar pages. Chalk markings, possibly counting number of kills, have been noted next to the defensive turrets. Addendum: Notable changes to SCP-3654 or the items within it have been recorded and listed below. Date: ██-██-1980 Notes: Bunk #7 was found emptied of personal effects save for a picture of a soldier, several bottles of alcohol, and a small pile of dried tropical flora. Date: ██-██-1980 Notes: The chalk markings next to the defensive turrets increased dramatically, rising from an average of 6 marks to 27 marks. Date: ██-██-1982 Notes: A note was found wedged near the vessel's wheel. It contained symbols and pictures that appeared to request munitions and food. The containment procedures were appended to include these materials following a testing period. Date: ██-██-1982 Notes: Following the implementation of including rations when SCP-3654 disappears, another note was found near the vessel's wheel. The pictures depicted crude drawings of Japanese boats on fire, and the image of a clock. Date: ██-██-1983 Notes: A sundial, composed of a palm trunk with chalk markings, was found on the deck of SCP-3654 Date: ██-██-1983 Notes: The sundial was found missing, but the markings remained. Investigation of the ship revealed the palm trunk broken into pieces and hidden under Bunk #8. Date: ██-██-1985 Notes: Multiple crewmen on the ship appeared to have moved their sleeping quarters nearer to the engine. A chalk line was drawn halfway between the bunks and the new sleeping area. Date: ██-██-1991 Notes: The captain's quarters were found ransacked. A destroyed pocket watch was found in the center of the cabin. Date: ██-██-1991 Notes: A barrier constructed of palm trunks with metal bars was blocking access to one of the cargo areas. Multiple bullet holes were found in the barrier. Behind several of the cargo containers, a paper calendar was discovered, with a large number of dates randomly crossed off. Date: ██-██-1998 Notes: Multiple shrines and pyres were discovered in burnt or semi-burnt states throughout SCP-3654. Date: ██-██-2009 Notes: The interior of the ship became covered in a massive amount of hand drawn clock faces, calendar pages, and symbols from their written language. Date: ██-██-2014 Notes: SCP-3654 was found in a small cove and appeared to have been intentionally scuttled. A large dark-brown stain, later discovered to be blood, was found in the center of the deck.

SCP-2078 is a meme transmitted by media or word-of-mouth communication referencing an individual named "████ █████", hereafter designated SCP-2078-1, an independent candidate who runs in every presidential election of the United States of America.

*** Item #: SCP-2078 Object Class: Keter Special Containment Procedures: Mobile Task Force Alpha-3 ("Running Mates") has been commissioned in order to contain SCP-2078; at no time are more than 49% of the membership of MTF Alpha-3 to possess American citizenship. In order to identify SCP-2078 infection vectors and infectees, MTF Alpha-3 operatives have been granted access to all Foundation telecommunications surveillance of the United States of America. MTF Alpha-3 also conducts regular scans of American news media, physical correspondence, and internet activity. Once identified, infectees are to be apprehended by MTF Alpha-3 personnel within twelve hours; failure to do so constitutes a containment breach. Contingents of MTF Alpha-3 armed with non-lethal weaponry are to assault any predicted or discovered mass congregations of SCP-2078 infectees; failure to apprehend all SCP-2078 infectees constitutes a containment breach and warrants usage of lethal force. MTF Alpha-3 agents embedded in the Federal Elections Commission (FEC) and American state governments are to intercept all attempts to register SCP-2078-1 as a candidate for election. MTF Alpha-3 operatives are to conduct surveillance of all American polling places on Election Day. In the event of a containment breach, aerosolized deployment of amnestics as well as detention and interrogation of civilians is authorized. All materials identified to be SCP-2078 infection vectors are to be subjected to standard CogHaz-4 containment and information sanitation protocols (full documentation on CogHaz-4 protocols are available to all members of MTF Alpha-3). All members of MTF Alpha-3 are to be trained in counter-memetic practices. Civilians or Foundation personnel infected with SCP-2078 are to be administered amnestics. If initial amnestic administration is unsuccessful in removing infection, researchers are permitted to administer Class-█ amnestics to infected subjects and reclassify them as Class-D personnel. Description: SCP-2078 is a meme transmitted by media or word-of-mouth communication referencing an individual named "████ █████", hereafter designated SCP-2078-1, an independent candidate who runs in every presidential election of the United States of America. There is no evidence that SCP-2078-1 exists in reality; the only information that is known regarding SCP-2078-1 comes from material produced by and interviews with SCP-2078 infectees. SCP-2078 only affects individuals who self-identify as citizens of the United States of America. Individuals must be exposed to infection vectors at a certain rate, ranging from three to twenty-five minutes per day, in order to become infected. Knowledge of SCP-2078's memetic nature and other counter-memetic practices are effective at combating infection. SCP-2078-1's political platform is unorthodox. Planks include legislation mandating a "birth requirement" of four or more children for all married couples, legislation defunding essential governmental programs such as defense or welfare in order to increase government subsidies of food-related industries, and a constitutional amendment prohibiting vegetarianism (Document-2078-██ compiles all information regarding SCP-2078-1's political platform). SCP-2078 infection dramatically alters an individual's behavior. All infectees, regardless of prior political affiliation, ascribe to SCP-2078-1's political platform; most infectees actively seek to spread SCP-2078 through the creation of political advertisements, usage of social media, or simple word-of-mouth communication. Furthermore, most infectees exhibit dramatically increased appetite, as well as decreased aversion to unhygienic practices. Experimentation has confirmed that SCP-2078 infectees lack a satiety response, enabling them to consume far in excess of normal human capacities. SCP-2078 infectees have been observed to coordinate gatherings of up to approximately two hundred infected individuals. These gatherings have been recorded to last for up to a week. Infectees employed in food service professions often use their positions to deliver large quantities of food to the gathering place in order to facilitate near-constant food consumption. Due to inadequate waste disposal facilities and infectee disregard for cleanliness, sanitation suffers dramatically. Infection and disease, sometimes resulting in death, are common. Infectees typically burn the bodies of the deceased. SCP-2078 infection vectors are distributed throughout the internet and mass media by an unknown source. Furthermore, despite Foundation intervention, SCP-2078-1’s name has occasionally appeared on the ballots of some voting districts. Addendum-2078A: On ██/██/20██, MTF Alpha-3 operatives intercepted a video file containing SCP-2078 infection vectors intended to be distributed via the internet. Notably, the advertisement seemed to include the first recorded instance of direct communication from SCP-2078-1. A transcript is provided below. Retrieved Document Log 2078-23 Camera pans over a sequence of still images of farmland and domesticated animals. Soft piano music plays in background. The sequence of images ends with a shot of an apple tree, with white picket fence in foreground and house in background. A man, wearing a suit with a blue tie, enters from the right into the shot. His face is digitally obscured, making it impossible to determine identity. He is using a toothpick, which he quickly discards. The man is presumed to be or represent SCP-2078-1. SCP-2078-1: I'm very lucky to be here today, and those of you who've given me support should all feel very proud of yourselves for working so hard to make this possible. I want to share with you some of my beliefs. SCP-2078-1 is shown giving a speech to an audience, which stands and applauds. SCP-2078-1's voice continues to narrate. SCP-2078-1: I believe in people power. I believe that together, Americans can accomplish amazing things. I decided to run for President because I had faith that America could make the right choice. Children are shown feeding chickens. SCP-2078-1: I'm all about moving back towards America's roots. You see, other politicians don't like to acknowledge America's fundamentals. We need those fundamentals to turn ourselves away from the path of asceticism. SCP-2078-1 is shown helping to deliver a baby. SCP-2078-1's voice is partially obscured by the mother's vocalizations. SCP-2078-1: I firmly believe that America can make the right choice to reclaim our potential from the forces that have gripped this country for the past six thousand years. Same shot of chickens as before is displayed. Children have disappeared. One chicken has scraps of cloth stuck in its claws. SCP-2078-1 then re-enters screen. SCP-2078-1: I want you to imagine an America where you can always hear a beating heart to reassure you that we are alive and that blood yet flows through these soft, soapy limbs. The Declaration of Independence says that we are given an inalienable right to the pursuit of happiness, but America, we are miserable. To think, to feel, to act, to be free—to be human—is to be miserable. The alternative is obvious. Think about what it would be like to strip off your clothes and feel your innards grow thick and heavy while incense wafts upwards from your loins and coils itself in your nose. Think about what it means to want nothing and know nothing. Imagine a world where we are all stuffed tight in a cramped, dim, sour-smelling place. Throughout the entire packed mass you'd feel the warmth and sweat and skin and soft fat of every other American. You'd hear their cries echo from wall to wall. And the world would know the dark, pulsating heart of this country. Screen fades to black. The words "[REDACTED] 20██" appear on the screen. Fine print at the bottom of the screen reads, "I can smell the fat burning off your bones." SCP-2078-1: God, wouldn't it be beautiful?

SCP-1620 is a sheet of rectangular metal alloy, measuring approximately 2m x 2.

*** Item #: SCP-1620 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: SCP-1620 is to be contained in a sealed room with walls and ceiling painted a flat, non-reflective grey color, with the object's inner surface pointed away from the door at all times. No reflective surfaces of any kind should be brought into SCP-1620's containment cell, including camera lenses. Personnel wishing to enter SCP-1620's containment to attempt a sample must obtain Level 4 authorization, dress only in non-reflective clothing, and submit to a 24-hour isolation period afterwards to ensure no accidental spreading of SCP-1620-1. If an individual is determined to be infected by SCP-1620-1, they must be placed in an opaque container with an air supply and immediately transported to an isolation cell with a single movable mirror and no other reflective surfaces. The mirror must be placed flat against the floor or wall whenever another individual is present in the cell, and otherwise used only to track the development of SCP-1620-1. Once SCP-1620-1 has reached stage 3 maturity, the mirror must be removed and the subject contained for a further minimum of three (3) months. Upon completion of the isolation period, if the subject views their reflection without any sign of SCP-1620-1, they may be released back to normal duty without incident. Description: SCP-1620 is a sheet of rectangular metal alloy, measuring approximately 2m x 2.5m x 0.25m, curving at an angle of 2.5 degrees along the long edge. One of the short edges is torn and jagged, while the remaining three edges are smooth at perfect right angles. Spectroscopic analysis of samples taken from SCP-1620 proved to be inconclusive, though high concentrations of both titanium and tungsten were registered. The 'outer' side of the object's surface is blackened, scarred, and pitted in a manner resembling exterior surfaces of man-made objects that have survived atmospheric re-entry, and exhibits no anomalous properties. SCP-1620's inner surface has an extremely high reflectivity, and causes all known manifestations of SCP-1620-1. When a human being or other humanoid living organism is reflected in SCP-1620's inner surface, they become host to an instance of the organism identified as SCP-1620-1. SCP-1620-1 is a noncorporeal, parasitic entity that copies and replaces humanoid reflections. As such, it is only visible or interactive when it can be viewed in a reflective surface. The entity's development progresses through three distinct phases over a period ranging from one to ten weeks, designated Stage 1 through Stage 3. Infection Stage 1 lasts between six and eighteen hours, starting from the time the host is exposed to SCP-1620 or a reflective surface currently displaying an instance of SCP-1620-1 in Stage 3 maturity. During Stage 1, the entity is visually identical to its host's actual reflection, and cannot be distinguished as abnormal by any individual other than its current host. Over the duration of Stage 1, the entity will become increasingly desynchronized from its host's actual movements, starting with a slight 'lag' effect as it belatedly attempts to imitate the host, and gradually progressing to the point where it behaves completely independently of the host. Infection Stage 2 lasts between twenty-four hours and seven days, though the transition point between late Stage 1 and early Stage 2 is difficult to identify. During Stage 2, SCP-1620-1 remains capable of visually independent activity, though it remains incapable of actually affecting the environment outside the reflective surface it is currently displayed in. When in view of humanoid organisms other than its host, SCP-1620-1 will attempt to imitate an ordinary reflection, though the 'lag' effect developed during Stage 1 remains. If apparently alone within its host's field of view, the entity exhibits a friendly and non-hostile demeanor, using body language to present a non-threatening attitude. When observed remotely and not in view of its host, however, SCP-1620-1 can be seen studying its host with anger or outright hostility, often accompanied by subtle or overtly threatening gestures. As Stage 2 progresses, the entity begins to diverge in visual appearance from its host as well, gaining or losing body mass, altering facial features, and changing overall body type. When SCP-1620-1's visual appearance has stabilized, it is considered to be in Stage 3. Infection Stage 3 lasts for an indeterminate time, currently not known to exceed nine weeks. During Stage 3, SCP-1620-1 reflects as a vaguely recognizable and heavily distorted image of its host, varying by individual but adhering to certain commonalities. Based on conducted testing, the appearance of a Stage 3 entity is believed to be a facsimile of the host's own subconscious self-image, rather than their outward physical shape. Notably, whether by accident or malice, SCP-1620 appears to latch onto the host's most negative self-portrayal, typically causing them great distress in the process. A Stage 3 instance of SCP-1620-1 is considered contagious, capable of spreading itself to the reflections of any suitable host currently displayed in whatever surface it is occupying. For the duration of Stage 3, the entity ceases to placate or interact invitingly towards its host, instead exhibiting actively threatening or mocking behavior regardless of if the host's attention is currently directed at it. Whether threatening the host or ignoring it entirely, its actions exhibit intent to either distress the host and induce it to seek help, or to draw the attention of onlookers and allow its propagation more directly. When Stage 3 reaches its conclusion, the entity appears to 'die', reversing all changes made to its appearance in minutes and returning the host's reflection to normal. To date, no individual known to host a Stage 3 instance of SCP-1620-1 has reported a recurrence, though host individuals have a high (60+%) chance of developing mild to severe catoptrophobia. Experiment Log 1620 Experiment Log 1620 Date: 04/12/██: Procedure: D-class personnel given, individually, a lighter, blowtorch, gas-welding torch, and flamethrower. Each subject instructed to approach SCP-1620 and attempt to apply a scorch or burn mark to either surface. Details: All attempts to mark or damage SCP-1620 by means of heat met with failure. D-1620-4 refused to cease use of the flamethrower on command and was terminated. The resultant explosion also had no effect on SCP-1620. Date: 04/14/██: Procedure: SCP-1620 removed from containment and transported in a sealed, opaque container to an outdoor location for destructibility testing. D-class personnel given various construction tools including saws, drills, claw and sledge hammers, and handheld jackhammers, and instructed to attempt to cause visible damage to SCP-1620's surface. Details: All manner of handheld tools failed to scratch, dent, or mark either surface of SCP-1620. Application of a pneumatic jackhammer to the object's damaged side succeeded in dislodging multiple samples. Samples removed for further testing. Date: 04/18/██: Procedure: Subject D-1620-5 deliberately exposed to the object and allowed to develop to Infection Stage 2, then instructed to interact with SCP-1620-1 and ask it questions. Details: SCP-1620-1 made no attempt to return interaction, instead smiling at D-1620-5, nodding pleasantly, giving small waves of welcome, and occasionally miming hugs in the air. When D-1620-5 was seen to be looking away from the mirror, SCP-1620-1's expression became flat and contemptuous, baring its teeth and reflexively clutching empty air in a strangling motion or drawing a finger across its throat. Date: 05/04/██: Procedure: Live orangutan exposed to SCP-1620, placed in isolation and observed visually via remote camera within view of a mirror. Details: Fourteen hours after initial exposure, orangutan's reflection viewed to be acting independently of its host as normal for a Stage 2 entity. Orangutan seen to exhibit great distress, behaving in a threatening manner towards its own reflection as it would another hostile orangutan. Date: 05/11/██: Procedure: Live iguana, live bull mastiff, live tuna, live African grey parrot exposed individually and sequentially to SCP-1620, placed in isolation and observed visually via remote camera within view of a mirror. Details: All test animals and their reflections failed to exhibit anomalous behavior as far as 72 hours after exposure, at which point testing was aborted. Date: 05/16/██: Procedure: Subject D-1620-6 exposed to SCP-1620, allowed to progress partway through Infection Stage 1, then instructed to approach a mirror and destroy it while SCP-1620-1 was exhibiting anomalous movement. Details: Mirror shattered without resistance. SCP-1620-1 visibly unharmed when next seen in another reflective surface and showed no reaction to its host, though hostile and abusive gestures towards the host in Stage 2 increased greatly in frequency and forcefulness. Date: 05/18/██: Procedure: Subject D-1620-7 exposed to SCP-1620, allowed to progress into Infection Stage 2, then placed in a room with two mirrors on opposite sides. Details: SCP-1620-1 exhibited standard anomalous behavior for a Stage 2 maturity state, but all visible copies of SCP-1620-1 moved and acted in total unison and synchronization. Date: 05/23/██: Procedure: Subjects D-1620-8 and D-1620-9 exposed to SCP-1620, allowed to progress into Infection Stage 3, then restrained together in a room with a single wall-to-wall mirror. Details: The subjects' parasite entities, designated SCP-1620-1a and SCP-1620-1b respectively, responded to each other's presence with excessive hostility. Both entities abandoned any pretense at staying with their hosts, travelling 'across' the room in the mirror and physically attacking each other. Upon the apparent victory of SCP-1620-1a involving its opponent's [REDACTED], D-1620-9 went into immediate convulsions and died of an apparent brain hemorrhage. D-1620-8 suffered no visible physical injuries, but went into hysterics and repeated insistence that 'that wasn't him, he wasn't really like that', requiring sedation before removal.

SCP-4825 is a wooden chair with leather cushions.

*** Item #: SCP-4825 Safe SCP-4825 upon recovery. Special Containment Procedures: SCP-4825 is to be contained inside an anomalous object container at Storage Site-64. Individuals terminated by SCP-4825 are to be declared missing in media outlets and official searches be discontinued in 6 months. Description:SCP-4825 is a wooden chair with leather cushions. When a subject sits on SCP-4825, they will spontaneously turn into dust, along with any objects held or worn by them. Touching SCP-4825 with other body parts such as the hands or feet do not activate its anomalous property. SCP-4825 was discovered in Miami, Florida when Foundation agents were sent to investigate reports of an unusually high number of unexplained disappearances. After several hours of investigation, 22 missing civilians were found to have entered Muke Ripbone's1 RV and not exit. When Foundation agents confronted PoI-1412, he ran towards SCP-4825 and sat on it, terminating himself. Addendum.SCP-4825.1: A journal filled with notes were found inside PoI-1412 RV. Contents are below: 5/05/2003 The doctor said my anger is causing me some health issues and told me to write down all my thoughts in a journal or something. Dumbass doctor thinking this pussy shit going to work like he knows what my issues are. He's just doing this to get me out of his office. All my life its been like this, people always been putting me down, shoving me away. 5/07/2003 A package appeared in the middle of the night with words written on it saying "Advancing humanity one at a time", real funny. When I open it and it was a chair, now what do I need a chair for? It's not like I get any guests. Came with a note too, saying that let anyone who disheartens you sit in this chair and some more mumbo jumbo crap. I'm not sitting in it, gives me weird vibes. Should throw it out this weekend. 5/08/2003 Holy shit. The loan shark found me today and barged into my van. He began breaking my stuff and I should have kicked his ass, but my leg been hurting lately. So after that, he gave me a contract to sign and sat in the chair and poof he was gone! Need to shred burn the package. No one saw him enter here and I'm sure he didn't have a partner. I can use this get rid of all those punks who keep fucking with me, let's see if it happens again. 5/12/2003 Well hot damn! All those fuckers fell for the same shit, "Oh sorry sir. Let me get your money right now, just sit there and wait." That's what they get, greedy heartless bastards. Let those hogs burn up. 6/05/2003 Just got my monthly checkup and the doctor said that a lot of my health issues are disappearing. I mean I feel calmer, I feel more motivated, it's like I can take on the whole fucking world. Should get that gym membership as well, maybe exercise could help my leg. 6/10/2003 Just got laid off my job today. Don't know how I'm gonna make it. Why did I listen to Thomas, he knew if I did that I would have gotten fired, of course, he did. I only wanted to hear the promises of promotion and raises you weak son of a bitch. I have nothing to my name and can't ask my damn siblings for shit, selfish motherfuckers. Gonna get Thomas in here and see how he feels getting screwed over. 6/16/2003 Found a new job, the loan sharks aren't coming anymore, and I got another (legal)loan, gonna make sure I don't mess up this time, can't afford too. I'm doing a lot more things lately, maybe my anger was the issue. Also, I found out that animals are unaffected by the chair. A squirrel got in through in the window and sat on it, still there eating its acorn as I write this. Need to clean that mold from the bowls to stop those annoying critters from coming in. 6/25/2003 There was RV get together today(Can't believe they still do those things) and overheard Ms. Jenkins talking about the cars around my house and the people never came back to get them. She's got a big a mouth, old lady syndrome, I guess. I really need to call the tow truck. Why do these things always happen to me? What did I ever do to deserve this, I'm trying to improve, I'm trying to be better, I'm even doing some charity! But no matter how much good you do in this world, it just wants to watch you fall. Damn it all. I'm gonna have to invite her. Maybe her kid too, just to be safe. What about her relatives, what would they say if they are missing? I just have to get rid of them if they start snooping around. 7/08/2003 My weak leg is getting way better. I guess getting that gym membership was really worth it. Need to work on my diet though, no more frozen pizzas, it's going to be rough(Not giving up my Pepsi though). I remember when I first got some Pepsi, my brother drench me in it to impress his friends. How is my family doing? Alfred is in Australia, living the life of a millionaire(Thanks to his gullible wife). What do you we call male golddiggers? Haddy is in California, living a decent life I assume as a dentist. When is she going to respond to my messages? It's not my fault her dumbass boyfriend(If you even call him that) took my Pepsi! He needs a good ass swopping, for pulling that shit. I really need to apologize. 7/26/2003 How can this happen? The girl I brought sat down in the chair, that poor dumbass, dying after I got this place spotless! I should have hidden it, why didn't I, dammit! She had several friends who knew she was coming here, they're going be snooping around soon. They were watching, they were, I saw them. All of them saw them. What about the people in the neighborhood, did they see? I don't want any conflict, I just want to live my life, why is the world against me. I'm not a bad guy. That's right! I exercise, I do charity, I work hard, I can't lose, bad things only come to bad people, that's what mother always told me and I'm not a bad person. I will I'll have to I must succeed. 8/10/2003 I WIN! I finally win, this world gave me something at last! No more witnesses, no more anybody. I finally did it. I'm going to Whataburger! 8/20/2003 Got promoted today in my new job, hard work does prevail. But something weird happened today, a letter signed by the "Advancing humanity one at a time" was on my table when I returned from work. I made sure I locked my door and there were no signs of forced entry. It said stuff about being free from your disease and the chair is no longer needed. Didn't say anything about taking it, so that's good. Don't want to run from the guy who made this thing, don't want to really run from anything, I rather die. He had one thing right, my health, my social life, financial situation, are all in order. Never been happier. Footnotes 1. Now designated as PoI-1412

SCP-2975 is a demolished house on the outskirts of the city of [REDACTED], originally built over an extensive cave system, leading to a crevasse extending an unknown depth into the Earth's mantle.

*** Item #: SCP-2975 Object Class: Neutralized Special Containment Procedures: The remains of SCP-2975 are monitored by Observation Post SYN-Alpha-019, staffed by members of Mobile Task Force Sigma-3 ("Bibliographers"). Any unusual activity is to be reported immediately to Site-19 Command. Description: SCP-2975 is a demolished house on the outskirts of the city of [REDACTED], originally built over an extensive cave system, leading to a crevasse extending an unknown depth into the Earth's mantle. This crevasse is now inaccessible. It is unclear whether it has simply closed, or no longer exists. SCP-2975 was considered a historical landmark by the local community, which was aware of its anomalous status, and colloquially referred to it as a "haunted house" and "The Memory House". With a few exceptions, most members of the local community attempted to prevent the discovery or containment of SCP-2975. On 03/06/████, a group called the Order of the White Sun attempted to use SCP-2975 as a ritual conduit to cause an XK-Class end of the world scenario. This was discovered by analysis of information patterns collated by Mobile Task Force Sigma-3. A series of localized CK-class reality shifts occurred during the operation to neutralize SCP-2975, obscuring the specific events which took place. However, the ritual event was terminated, and SCP-2975 was demolished by Mobile Task Force Psi-7 ("Home Improvement"). No anomalous activity has been recorded from SCP-2975 since ██/██/████. Addendum: SCP-2975 Partial Interview Logs [Post-SCP-2975 neutralization] Interview M. Donaldson Excerpt Close File Interview with Morgan Donaldson, community member local to SCP-2975. (Excerpt) Morgan Donaldson: Look, I'm not really comfortable speaking with Jailors, but [REDACTED] said I had to come and talk to you, so here I am. Interviewer: Thank you. I just have some questions about the House on Memory Lane, if you don't mind. Morgan Donaldson: The Memory House? The one your people blew up? A lot of us aren't happy about that, you know. I have to say, I agree with them. Interviewer: Can you elaborate? Morgan Donaldson: It was a center of our community. Interviewer: Well, I understand it did… er, eat people. Morgan Donaldson: Only the ones it was fed. Mostly. A few others, sure, but everyone should've known to stay away from that part of town after dark. Interviewer: What about people who didn't know about the house's… dangerous aspects? Morgan Donaldson: Who cares about them? They weren't from around here. Outsiders, like you people. This just goes towards the general decay of our society, you know. The Hand is going radical, and people in this community cast aside our traditions and betray us to you Jailors. [Shakes head] I don't mean to offend you, but it's just the way things are. Interviewer: I promise, the, uh, sect of Jailors we're part of, we work with local communities. We won't do anything to disrupt your community, I promise. Morgan Donaldson: You destroyed the Memory House. You imprisoned its caretakers. If that isn't disrupting our community, I don't know what is. Interviewer: Well, the House… was eating people, wasn't it? Or… being fed people, right? Morgan Donaldson: I told you. Only outsiders, only people who didn't matter. Not the people who can take care of themselves worth a damn. People die in the streets all the time, in cities all around the world, and no one cares. [Pause] Morgan Donaldson: Alright, sure, it shouldn't have been allowed to go on the way it did. Maybe we should've done something sooner. What do you want me to say? Interviewer: Doesn't it make a difference that the White Sun cult — the caretakers of the Memory House — that they were trying to end the world? Morgan Donaldson: Look, you're missing the point. Yes, the caretakers of the House went too far. But if you'd left it to us to handle, we could have found a solution. A better solution. We wouldn't have just razed a living historical icon to the ground. There had to be another way. Close File Interview D. Sawyer Excerpt Close File Interview with Danielle Sawyer, community member local to SCP-2975. (Excerpt) Danielle Sawyer: I admit, I didn't even know about the whole world-ending thing. I just thought this had gone on long enough. Something had to be done about that damn house, and that cult holed up there. Interviewer: And there was resistance to this? Danielle Sawyer: Oh, like you wouldn't believe. "Oh, it's just our local people-eating haunted house. You know how it is, you just have to know when to avoid it. Oh, no, you can't tear it down, it's a traditional part of our community! That cult is a charming piece of local color! They've been here for generations, one of them's on the City Council, and isn't he nice and respectable? This is just a phase, usually they only sacrifice two or three homeless girls a year. Just give it some time!" [Pause] Danielle Sawyer: Sometimes I just don't know what is wrong with people. Interviewer: How many people were involved in protecting the house? Danielle Sawyer: Well, if I'm being honest, we're all culpable. I grew up knowing about the house, of course. It only ate a few people a year. Most of them fed to it by the Order. People always said it was okay so long as you don't go to the wrong part of town, or went only with the protection of the White Sun cultists there. [Pause] Danielle Sawyer: There were a lot of people who found it fascinating, actually — it was something of a local attraction. People from all over the world came to observe it, and from some other worlds, too. They called it "a symbiotic architectural hive-mind generally not observed in baseline realities." And the caves under it, "a portal to the True Dream", "the Gate of Horn", "the Pit of Eternity". I did a little reading on it as a kid, for a class report in high school. Never understood it as much as I pretended to, but I got an A, so hey. [Pause] Danielle Sawyer: Then the cultists started looking around for fresh sacrifices, I guess for the end-of-the-world thing people are talking about, and outsiders stopped coming to check it out, and a few less well-liked locals disappeared into the night over the course of a couple weeks… and people still made excuses, handed out more great advice. Jokes, like, just don't wear skimpy clothing, you know they like their sacrifices nubile. But seriously, don't go outside at night. Just keep your head down. And that's how it was. No one wanted to do anything at all. Even the ones who didn't like it, they said it wasn't really our business. No one wanted to be the one to make the first move. Interviewer: I see. What made you change your mind? Danielle Sawyer: Well, judge me if you like, but it was when I found out they were starting to target Mages. First it was some of the more otherworldly tourists, and then the particular townsfolk who started disappearing… I started noticing they were all people with magic in their blood. I'm not surprised, in retrospect, now that I know what the big ritual was. Rituals like that need magically rich fuel, so I'm told. I'm no Mage myself, but you know, I did have an aunt who was a witch… I started worrying about my own skin, I guess. If my aunt had magic in her blood, maybe I had a bit in it too. And maybe I'd be next. [Pause] Danielle Sawyer: So I'm not proud, but… that's when I knew I had to draw the line. That's when I started getting people together to destroy that House once and for all. [Pause] Danielle Sawyer: Anyway, I wasn't happy about calling in you Jailors. I don't trust the police and I don't trust you. But I had a friend who'd heard that there was a way to contact some friendly Jailors if you knew the right people, and then she told me she did know the right people, and… it seemed to be the only option we had left. You sure did get the job done. And I guess the world could've ended? So… I'm glad it didn't. Congratulations for all that, at least. [Pause] Danielle Sawyer: I'm glad the Memory House is gone. Still, though… I have to admit this town won't be the same without it. Close File == SPECIAL ACCESS PROGRAM REQUIRED SIGMA-3/ANOTHER-SUN == The following after-action report, recorded with the local Sigma-3 team leader, contains significant inconsistencies. Due to the unclear events of 03/06/████, involving several localized CK-class reality shifts, all inconsistent aspects of the reports have been included. SCP-2975 After Action Report Please don't take my sunshine away.

SCP-1187 is a blue 2006 Kazuma 150cc All Terrain Vehicle.

*** Item #: SCP-1187 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-1187 is to be stored in a remote, above-ground enclosure 5km from Site 19 with a staff of 2 armed guards and 1 Level 1 researcher. SCP-1187 should remain inverted upon its transportation trailer at all times when not being tested. The subject's ignition key, designated SCP-1187-1, is to be stored in the office of the Level 3 director at Site 19 overseeing SCP-1187, and is available upon written request. Testing must be conducted no less than 10km from any Foundation facility or population center. SCP-1187 is to be removed from its trailer and operated by a Class D subject in the center of a 500m cleared circle. All security and research personnel should remain at the edge of the perimeter, directing and observing the test remotely. Description: SCP-1187 is a blue 2006 Kazuma 150cc All Terrain Vehicle. It was sold and delivered to ██████ ████ of ████████, South Carolina via an anonymous online merchant site. The seller has yet to be located. The owner's initial test ride resulted in an anomalous incident which was suppressed in public media as a powerful but isolated earthquake. When the accelerator is engaged SCP-1187 remains stationary while the surface beneath its wheels shifts horizontally towards the rear of the vehicle at an increasing rate of speed. SCP-1187 is capable of dragging a 3m wide by 15cm deep strip of terrain at speeds of up to 40kph. This effect extends to approximately 250m in front of the vehicle and 50m behind. Continued operation will shear an increasing amount of material from below the top layer, eventually excavating a furrow and depositing it to the rear of SCP-1187. Manipulating the steering column will rotate SCP-1187 and shift the area of influence. Applying the brakes will slow and eventually cease the effect. Operating SCP-1187 in the vicinity of buildings or other above ground structures and objects is exceedingly dangerous, as mass above the driving plane is not arrested by braking.

SCP-3590 is a ceremony which, when correctly performed, will render one of the participants, henceforth referred to as SCP-3590-1, completely mute.

*** Item #: SCP-3590 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: All physical documents referring and/or describing the execution of SCP-3590 are to be kept in standard containment locker SCL27/3590, currently located at Safe class containment wing of Site-27. There are no on-going research projects dedicated to the analysis of SCP-3590 and requests regarding its study should be submitted to Site-27 administration through appropriate channels (see Form SCP-3590/R, embedded). All personnel previously involved in the execution of SCP-3590 have received appropriate amnestic treatment. Knowledge of SCP-3590 is considered nonexistent outside of Foundation databases, but reports pertaining to similar phenomena will be monitored to gauge the possibility of containment breach. Access to earlier iterations of Special Containment Procedures for SCP-GAMMA1 is currently restricted to authorized Level 3 personnel. This document is part of the required reading for all personnel assigned to SCP-DELTA2. Description: SCP-3590 is a ceremony which, when correctly performed, will render one of the participants, henceforth referred to as SCP-3590-1, completely mute. No physiological changes are observed upon analysis of SCP-3590-1 and the process by which the participant is rendered unable to speak is not currently understood. No means to reverse the process are currently known. SCP-3590 bears similarities to several rituals commonly pertaining to major Abrahamic faiths, although it cannot be accurately attributed to any of them, considering: Iconography employed is contradictory and pertains to entirely different doctrines. Spoken verses cannot be traced to any known religious texts. Spoken verses are incoherent and convey no obvious meaning. SCP-3590 requires three participants, each being assigned different roles. Participants assigned the tasks of [REDACTED] and [REDACTED] display no anomalous properties before, during or after the performance of SCP-3590. The participant assigned with [REDACTED] invariably becomes an instance of SCP-3590-1, as observed in all recorded experiments following Incident GAMMA/DELTA-A. SCP-3590 was formerly a major component of the Special Containment Procedures for SCP-GAMMA (original designation ''Procedure GAMMA-Cezar''), displaying no anomalous properties when performed either by non-anomalous participants or other Class I Reality Bending entities besides SCP-GAMMA. Before Incident GAMMA/DELTA-A, the ceremony had been successful at completely suppressing any anomaly originating from SCP-GAMMA during long intervals, and was performed routinely at the entity's request and/or according to necessity to prevent consistent, if mild damage to containment cell of SCP-GAMMA. No known data exists regarding how SCP-GAMMA came to be in Foundation custody. It is also unclear how the knowledge of SCP-3590 and its application as an effective counter-measure to SCP-GAMMA were discovered. Supplemental documentation is attached: INCIDENT SUMMARY. Appropriate security clearance required. Credentials accepted. User has valid clearance - opening document.  Incident GAMMA/DELTA-A On ██/██/████, during a scheduled performance of Procedure GAMMA-Cezar, as part of the containment procedures for SCP-GAMMA, a previously undocumented behavior of the anomaly associated with SCP-GAMMA resulted in its neutralization, the temporary breach of SCP-DELTA's containment and the death of two members of Site-27 D class personnel. It is currently unknown whether or not SCP-3590 was a factor in any of the events observed during Incident GAMMA/DELTA-A. Authorized personnel may request a full report of the incident should the containment of SCP-DELTA become a concern. Follow-up experiments identified the now anomalous results of Procedure GAMMA-Cezar, warranting its re-designation as SCP-3590. FULL INCIDENT REPORT. Appropriate security clearance required. Credentials accepted. User has valid clearance - showing report.  Report: Incident GAMMA/DELTA-A Foreword: SCP-GAMMA, along with two D Class personnel, had almost finished performing SCP-3590, after 27 minutes elapsed since the start of the ceremony. D27-382 and D27-876 had successfully performed SCP-3590 along with SCP-GAMMA ██ times before the incident. Research team assigned to SCP-GAMMA at the time oversees the procedure via CCTV. Events transpire inside the now decommissioned IRBE27/GAMMA containment cell. <Begin Log> <16:18> D27-382 blows the fifth candle, thus finishing his role in SCP-3590. <16:19> D27-876 approaches SCP-GAMMA, placing the third crucifix around its neck. <16:19> Last chants are sung in unison by D27-876 and SCP-GAMMA. <16:20> SCP-3590 concluded. Research team confirms recession on the Scranton scale. SCP-GAMMA seem relieved and proceeds to thank D27-876 and D27-382, whom it addresses by name. Behavior in line with previous observation. <16:22> D27-876 and D27-382 finish collecting materials used in SCP-3590, as instructed by Research team. No consumables left. <16:23> D27-876, D27-382 and SCP-GAMMA make casual conversation while exit quarantine protocols are lifted. <16:25> Confirmed malfunction of IRBE27/GAMMA's entrance. Tech team dispatched to access the problem. D27-876 and D27-382 instructed to await their arrival. <16:28> Sharp increase on the Scranton scale. Source unknown, presumably SCP-GAMMA, though the entity continues to converse with D Class personnel. No visible changes inside containment cell. <16:28> Quarantine protocols automatically reestablished. Tech team ordered to await further instructions. D27-876, D27-382 and SCP-GAMMA seem confused over the development and are told to remain calm while the Research team deals with what appears to be an equipment failure. <16:30> State-wide warning regarding SCP-DELTA breach of containment issued by Site-29. <16:31 to 16:35> Steady increase on the Scranton scale is matched by elevation of radiation exposure detected in D27-876's and D27-382's implants. Readings of approximately 40 mSv confirmed. <16:36> North and south walls of the containment cell undergo severe warping, incompatible with that which a Class I Reality Bending entity should be able to induce given the cell's [REDACTED]. D27-876, D27-382 and SCP-GAMMA are visibly distressed and attempt to escape through containment door, which remains inoperable. <16:37 to 16:38> Formation of a Hartle IV class space-time anomaly inside IRBE27/GAMMA confirmed. Anomaly expands until both its axes measure roughly 1 m. <16:38> SCP-GAMMA coerces D27-876 and D27-382 to perform SCP-3590 again. D Class personnel complies, despite being ordered otherwise by Research team. <16:39> SCP-DELTA begins to emerge through the Hartle IV class anomaly, as four of its appendages become visible in video feedback. SCP-GAMMA is now panicking while it further attempts to coordinate with the equally distressed D Class personnel in order to perform a second rendition of SCP-3590. <16:40> First instance of SCP-DELTA-B, ''Laughter'', is emitted by SCP-DELTA as its head passes through newly-formed space-time anomaly. As well documented, all sounds produced by SCP-DELTA, namely SCP-DELTA-A through SCP-DELTA-E, are considered auditory cognitohazards and receive individual designations. Research team suffers no adverse effects due to previous inoculation; attempt to perform SCP-3590 interrupted, as D27-876 and D27-382 are effected by SCP-DELTA-B and promptly [REDACTED]. SCP-GAMMA is unaffected, but increasingly desperate. <16:42> Request to rescue SCP-GAMMA denied by Site-27 administration on grounds of possible escalation of SCP-DELTA containment breach. SCP-DELTA has now fully emerged though Hartle IV anomaly and continues to emit SCP-DELTA-B at regular intervals. Space-time anomaly remains stable. SCP-GAMMA begs to be released from containment while addressing one of the cell's cameras. Footage review reveals SCP-GAMMA seemingly struggling to vocalize, possibly documenting the first instance of the anomaly associated with SCP-3590. <16:43> SCP-DELTA attacks SCP-GAMMA, while it continues to emit SCP-DELTA-B. <16:45> Research team requests immediate deployment of SRAs to aid in re-containment of SCP-DELTA and prevent the expiration of SCP-GAMMA. Denied by Site-27 administration on grounds of [REDACTED]. Standard Class III Reality Bending containment protocols enacted instead. <19:05> SCP-DELTA stops emitting SCP-DELTA-B and remains inert after scattering the last remains of SCP-GAMMA throughout the cell. After a few attempts to breach the containment door, SCP-DELTA retreats through the Hartle IV anomaly, which remained stable during the incident. <19:06> Hartle IV anomaly recedes. <19:08> Site-29 confirms reestablishment of SCP-DELTA containment. <19:08 to 20:31> Screams in what resembles SCP-GAMMA's voice continue to be heard through monitoring system, though no source is identifiable. <20:32> No anomaly detected inside IRBE27/GAMMA. Quarantine protocols lifted. Recovery teams dispatched to collect relevant materials. IRBE27/GAMMA decommissioned according to previously enacted protocol. <End Log> Closing Statement: Personnel assigned to SCP-DELTA containment at Site-29 reports the appearance of a Hartle IV space-time anomaly inside SCP-DELTA's containment cell similar to the one described in this report during its breach on ██/██/████ - it is inferred that both anomalies were, thus, connected and facilitated said containment breach, along with the further development of Incident GAMMA/DELTA-A. How these anomalies were formed is not currently known, but studies are underway. ADDENDUM. Appropriate security clearance required. Credentials accepted. User has valid clearance - showing addendum.  Addendum: Regarding SCP-DELTA. Noticeable changes in SCP-DELTA behavior were observed preceding and following Incident GAMMA/DELTA-A: Starting on ██/██/████, four days before the breach, the emissions of SCP-DELTA-A, ''Bellowing'' and SCP-DELTA-E, ''Shrieking'', were recorded to sharply increase in frequency compared to other sounds produced by SCP-DELTA. This behavior remained consistent until 14:36, ██/██/████, when Site-29 experienced localized power outages due to yet unexplained equipment failures pertaining to generators [REDACTED]. This incident did not compromise SCP-DELTA's containment, though monitoring of its cell was interrupted while it transpired. At 14:56, ██/██/████, when power was restored, SCP-DELTA displayed yet another change in behavior, emitting SCP-DELTA-B constantly from that point until its re-containment following Incident GAMMA/DELTA-A. Since re-contained, SCP-DELTA has emitted no sound, except for a single 5 seconds long instance of SCP-DELTA-D, ''Crying'', on ██/██/████. Object Class revision for SCP-DELTA has been suggested and is under consideration. Footnotes 1. Actual SCP designation restricted to personnel assigned security clearance Level 3/GAMMA. 2. Actual SCP designation restricted to personnel assigned security clearance Level 3/DELTA.

SCP-1063 is a humanoid automaton which appears to be constructed entirely out of wood, with highly articulated joints made of wooden ball bearings of various sizes.

*** Item #: SCP-1063 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: SCP-1063 is to be kept in a 20m x 20m x 6m habitat simulating a temperate deciduous/coniferous forest environment, bordered by 60 (sixty)-cm-thick unpolished granite walls covered with live moss; SCP-1063 is unable highly reluctant to damage objects which are supporting live plants. All personnel who enter SCP-1063's containment for any purpose are to carry live potted plants in plain view; guards are to carry flamethrowers as well as potted plants. It is forbidden to speak English within 30 meters of SCP-1063's containment, as SCP-1063 becomes hostile towards individuals whom it has heard speaking English. Vegetation and microfauna in SCP-1063's habitat are to be maintained according to schedule 1063-N6. Climate in SCP-1063's habitat is to be maintained according to schedule 1063-CX5; after each simulated rainfall, SCP-1063 is to be provided with a plain towel made of 100% natural unbleached undyed fibers, so that it may dry its non-water-resistant components. Description: SCP-1063 is a humanoid automaton which appears to be constructed entirely out of wood, with highly articulated joints made of wooden ball bearings of various sizes. It is 2 meters tall, 103 kg, and resembles a bearded Caucasian man in mid-19th-century formal wear. Its lower left arm does not terminate in a hand, but instead flattens and broadens to form an axe blade almost 70 cm across. Although this blade is made of wood, it is razor-sharp, and is almost metallic in its mechanical properties; when enraged, SCP-1063 is able to sever human heads or limbs in a single blow, and to chop through over 30 (thirty) cm of granite, with no damage to the blade. SCP-1063's "clothes" are carved out of wood and are of a piece with its body, with the exception of several cosmetic accessories all made of severely oxidized copper (six "shirt" buttons, a warped and dented hatband encircling its head, a broken monocle rim surrounding its right eye, cufflinks on its right "sleeve", a belt buckle, and a watch chain dangling from its left "coat pocket" — but no watch), and a tattered and faded Swastika armband on its upper right arm. Its power source is unknown, as are the methods by which it is able to see, hear, and think; radiographic, ultrasonic and [REDACTED] imaging all indicate that it is solid wood, with the exception of the aforementioned cosmetic accessories. SCP-1063 is not able to speak, but can write in several dialects of German, as well as in French. Psychological examinations have revealed a generally affable personality, characterised by mood swings and an overall low intelligence. (NOTE: Researchers wishing to interview SCP-1063 should familiarize themselves with the Fraktur mode of calligraphy). SCP-1063 refers to itself as "Freiherr von Schwarzwald", or "Lord of the Black Forest", and has described itself as a genuine aristocrat, ennobled by "the King himself" (translated from German); SCP-1063 has not been able to provide more specific information as to which king this was, but has expressed scorn at the suggestion that it was Wilhelm I of Prussia (who later became the Kaiser, or Emperor), describing him as an 'upstart' and "latecomer". These attitudes, and other statements made by SCP-1063, indicate that it was created no later than the mid-19th century, which is in accordance with its style of clothing. SCP-1063 has stated that it has two purposes in existence. The first purpose, which it claims to have had since "the day of my first waking", is to protect the trees and other plant life of the Black Forest region of Germany at any cost. The second purpose, which it claims to have been taught by "those nice soldiers who gave me the [swastika] armband", is to protect Germany from English-speaking invaders. SCP-1063 first came to the Foundation's attention as the result of a statistically anomalous number of missing persons reports from the village of [REDACTED], Germany, in 19██. Foundation personnel surveyed the region while disguised as a search party, and were attacked by SCP-1063 when they began to prepare a campfire; subject was quickly subdued and captured with no casualties. After capturing SCP-1063, personnel coerced it into showing them the bodies of the ██ people it had killed for either "harmful disrespect of nature" or speaking English; the bodies were then further mutilated to support a cover story of accidental discovery of leftover explosives from the Second World War.

SCP-6083 is a nine year old human child, James Brown, born on 01/11/2016.

*** Item #: SCP-6083 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: All direct contact with SCP-6083 is handled by and at the discretion of its current handler, Senior Researcher Jones. SCP-6083 is currently held in a modified humanoid containment chamber fitted with several amenities at the request of Senior Researcher Jones. In the event that Senior Researcher Jones dies or is otherwise rendered incapable of performing her role in the containment of SCP-6083, a replacement researcher is to be assigned. Description: SCP-6083 is a nine year old human child, James Brown, born on 01/11/2016. Its body is heavily scarred, most noticeably around the face and its left eye, which has been fully blinded due to a slashing wound. SCP-6083 demonstrates abnormally high emotional intelligence and is able to accurately read the emotions of those in its direct proximity when those emotions are directed at SCP-6083 itself. Due to a set of currently unknown factors, some individuals gradually lose their ability to perceive SCP-6083. This process is known to cause subjects to experience mild to severe headaches. This anomalous effect is currently thought to be triggered based on a set of unknown conditions.1 Once an individual becomes fully unable to perceive SCP-6083, they will forget all details of its existence. Reintroducing the fact of SCP-6083's existence to effected individuals momentarily allows them to acknowledge it, but has failed to restore any sensory ability to detect SCP-6083. SCP-6083 is unable to manipulate this process at will. Amnestic and mnestic treatments have proved ineffective at reversing or slowing this process. Interview Log 6083-1 Interviewer: Senior Researcher Jones Interviewed: SCP-6083 Foreword: This interview was conducted on 14/05/2024, shortly after SCP-6083's initial containment. Senior Researcher Jones was not permitted to question SCP-6083 about its anomalous properties or any other sensitive issues in this interview unless directly offered.2 Begin Log. … Jones: So 6083- SCP-6083: 6083? Is that my new name? Jones: Oh, my apologies. Would you prefer if I used your normal name, James? SCP-6083: Yes please. 6083 just sounds weird. Jones: Yes I suppose it does. Doesn't it? Jones appears to drift off in thought, as SCP-6083 stares intently at her. SCP-6083: Miss, your necklace. SCP-6083 points at the amethyst pendant Jones is wearing. SCP-6083: It's really pretty. Jones: Thank you very much. I made it myself. SCP-6083: Wow! You must be really famous if you can make something this cool! Jones: No, I'm not. Really. I'm nothing special. SCP-6083: That's not true. You're the first person who talked to me since I came here. That makes you really special. Jones: I suppose you're not wrong about that. SCP-6083: Oh. And-and-and you don't feel sorry for me or anything. Jones: Is that so special? SCP-6083: (nods) It's really rare that people don't just look at me and feel bad. You're really special, Miss. Jones: I see. Well thank you for thinking so highly of me. (pauses) About people feeling bad when they see you. Does that upset you? SCP-6083 nods. SCP-6083: I don't like when everyone around me gets sad. I think that no one should feel sad when they look at me, otherwise no one can be happy and play with me. Jones smiles. Jones: Well, I'm afraid I can't play with you James, but I can promise I won't be any sadder when you're around. Ok? SCP-6083: Okay, Miss. I promise I'll be good so that I don't make everyone sad. Jones: (mutters) Oh, if only it were that easy. SCP-6083: What? Jones: Sorry. It's nothing. SCP-6083: You're weird, Miss. Jones: (chuckles) Yeah. I get that a lot. SCP-6083: Will more people come play with me soon? Jones: Probably not too soon, but I'll come back to talk to you tomorrow and ask you a few questions. Ok? SCP-6083: Can we play just a little bit after we talk? I know you said we couldn't, but come on. Just a little bit. Please? Jones: Well, maybe if you're good. SCP-6083: Ok! Jones: Then, I'll see you tomorrow. … End Log. Interview Log 6083-2 Interviewer: Senior Researcher Jones Interviewed: SCP-6083 Foreword: This interview was conducted as a follow-up to SCP-6083's first interview on 14/05/2024. Given SCP-6083's generally positive mental state during the first interview, Senior Researcher Jones was permitted to begin questioning it about its anomalous properties. Begin Log. … Jones walks into SCP-6083's cell and sits down next to it. It is playing with the plastic cutlery that was provided with it's most recent meal. Jones: Hello again James. SCP-6083: Hi Miss. SCP-6083 mimics the sound of an aeroplane whilst waving around it's cutlery. Jones: I see you've found a way to have fun already. SCP-6083: Look. It's an aeroplane! SCP-6083 continues to play with it's cutlery. Jones waits for a few minutes before clearing her throat to attract SCP-6083's attention. Jones: James I did come all this way to talk to you. Would you mind landing the aircraft a second so we can have a chat? SCP-6083 lowers the cutlery and briefly slides it along the ground before leaving it. SCP-6083: Okay, Miss. I'm all done now. What did you want to talk about? Jones: I wanted to ask you a bit about how you got here. SCP-6083: Umm… The people at the orphanage started ignoring me for some reason, so I started to get in some trouble. The police had a big argument with the adults and then the men in suits came and took me here. Jones: I see. Do you have any idea why the other people started ignoring you? SCP-6083: I think it might have been because of the family I scared away. They seemed really nice, but they were really awkward around me. I think they got a little scared of my face. Jones: I can't blame them. Just look at that devilish smile! Jones pinches SCP-6083's cheeks as they both laugh. PA System: Jones, please refrain from unnecessary contact and small talk with the anomaly. Jones: Alright. Alright. You could at least let me and the kid have some fun. Jones briefly glares at the camera in SCP-6083's cell before resuming conversation. Jones: Well, you heard the man. I guess we gotta do this the boring way. SCP-6083: No fair! I thought we were gonna get to play! Jones: I'm really sorry James. I'll definitely make it up to you. How about this? I'm sure this room is a bit boring for you. How about I help you redecorate? I can bring a toy or two with me next time too. So, could you please forgive me this one time? SCP-6083: (pouting) Mmmm… Ok, I guess. I wanted to play now, but if it's not your fault I can't be mad at you. But next time promise you can play with me! Jones: Ok. I pro- PA System: Don't make promises you can't keep Jones. Jones: Oh, come on! You can't just let me play with the kid for a while? PA System: Sorry, it's not my call. The higher-ups have been really cracking down on us whenever we don't follow standard procedure what with the incident at Site-11 last month. SCP-6083: Does that mean I won't get to play with you, Miss? Jones: No way! Don't worry about that wet blanket. I can deal with him later. Some background noise is picked up through the PA System. SCP-6083: So we'll get to play soon? Jones: 100%. SCP-6083: Great. I'm gonna make sure you stick to that. Jones: Don't worry about that. Just start thinking of ideas for what you wanna do when we play together next time. Should I bring Monopoly? Hmmm… I'll think of something good. Unless you know what you want to play? SCP-6083 shrugs. Jones: It's fine then. I'll think of something. In any case, was it everyone who ignored you? Or just a couple people who were mad at you? SCP-6083: The only person who didn't ignore me was Thomas. He used to hit me, but when everyone started ignoring me he got worried. I think they let him in on it after that though, because he started doing it too. Jones: I see. So was that around the time the police got involved? SCP-6083: (nods) The police came I think a day after Thomas got in on the prank. Jones: Ok. That's all good then. I think I'm beginning to understand what happened. SCP-6083: Does that mean I'll be going back to the orphanage soon? Jones: No, I don't think so. It's not good for people to be playing such a mean prank on you. I think you'll be staying here for a while James. PA System: Jones, the Site Director says they want to see you in their office, now. Jones: Really? Oh for- Alright, James I think that means we'll have to finish here for today, but I'll definitely keep my promise to you. Don't worry. Next time, I swear we'll get to play together. SCP-6083 seems upset, but remains quiet. Jones: Awww… Come on, now. Don't give me that look. I even swore I'd play with you next time. Ok, look. Pinky promise. Jones kneels down to face SCP-6083 and extends out her pinky finger. SCP-6083 does the same and the two lock pinkies before moving their hands up and down, as in a handshake. Jones: Cross my heart. Hope to die. SCP-6083: Now if you don't keep your promise you have to stick a needle in your eye. Jones: I guess I had better keep that promise then, huh? PA System: Jones, the Site Director is waiting on you. Terminate this interview at once. Jones walks to the door of SCP-6083's cell and briefly turns around to wave at it before leaving. … End Log. Afterword: For her breach of conduct during this interview with SCP-6083, Senior Researcher Jones was initially issued a formal warning and was put under probation for three months. However, at the recommendation of the Site psychiatrist, who observed that SCP-6083's mental state was improving as a result of Jones' actions, her punishment was withdrawn and she was permitted to continue her friendly advances towards it. Interview Log 6083-3 Interviewer: Senior Researcher Jones Interviewed: SCP-6083 Foreword: This interview was conducted shortly after SCP-6083's cell was refurbished at the request of Senior Researcher Jones. Begin Log. … Jones enters SCP-6083's room holding a wrapped present. She sits down next to SCP-6083, which is playing with a model car given to it by Jones during a previous interview. She fidgets momentarily, before clearing her throat to attract SCP-6083's attention. SCP-6083: Oh. Hi again, Miss. You're early today. Jones: Well, I thought I should bring you something to celebrate the redecoration. This room feels much more you, now. Doesn't it? SCP-6083: Yeah I didn't like the old room. It was so boring I felt like I was going to die. Jones: Well, you don't need to worry now. I'll make sure you don't get bored and can have all the fun you want! SCP-6083: Can I see what you got me? Jones: Of course. Here. Jones hands SCP-6083 the present and it quickly tears open the wrapping paper. Inside the paper is a jewellery box containing a handmade topaz pendant, matching the amethyst pendant Jones is wearing. SCP-6083: It's a pendant just like yours! But why is the stone different? Jones: That's your birthstone, topaz. This one is mine, amethyst. So we have matching pendants of our birthstones. I thought I'd use your birthstone instead of just using amethyst, since that's why I used amethyst for mine in the first place. SCP-6083: Thank you so much! I'll treasure it forever and ever! SCP-6083 takes the pendant out of the box and hands it to Jones. SCP-6083: Put it on me! Put it on me! Jones takes the pendant and hooks it around SCP-6083's neck. SCP-6083: How does it look? Jones: It just might look better on you than it does on me. SCP-6083 hugs Jones. Guards situated outside of SCP-6083's chambers began moving to intervene before Jones signalled them to stand down. Jones: So, James, do you want to talk like we normally do? Or would you rather we do something else? SCP-6083: Talk! I like talking to you. SCP-6083 lets go of Jones and sits down on the floor of the room. Jones: So, what do you want to talk about? SCP-6083: Hmmm… We've already talked a lot about me. Tell me about you. Jones: Well, there's not much to talk about. I'm not very interesting compared to you. SCP-6083: I'm sure that's not true, Miss. Just tell me a story about you. Please? Jones: Well, let's see… I could tell you about how I got this job. That's probably the most interesting thing I can- Jones stops as the lights cut out due to a power failure. The cell door slams shut and locks itself. The recording of the interview also briefly cuts out before the backup power starts. Jones is holding SCP-6083 when the recording restarts. SCP-6083: What happened? Why did the lights go out? Jones: Something bad happened somewhere else in the building. We'll have to stay put here for a bit. Jones signals the guards outside the cell. Jones: You guys need to get out of here to stay safe. We'll be fine in here. Go help with the re-containment effort. The guards nod and leave the area. Jones: Sorry about this. We'll probably be stuck like this for a while, but we should be fine just staying put. SCP-6083: So, does that mean we can keep on talking? Jones: Sure. That'd be a way to pass the time at least. PA System: ALERT: A containment breach has occurred in the Keter-wing. All containment cells have been locked until the Site is secured. Please evacuate to a safe location as dispatched Mobile Task Forces work to re-contain the escaped anomalies. SCP-6083: What does "keter" mean? Jones: It's what we call a containment class. Basically if something is very difficult to keep from escaping, it's "keter". SCP-6083: Is it dangerous? Jones: What do you mean? SCP-6083: Is a keter dangerous? Jones: A lot of them are. Definitely most of the ones on this site are. SCP-6083 shows signs of becoming distressed. SCP-6083: Then why did the guards leave if it's dangerous? What if we get hurt? Jones: It's fine James. This is actually about the safest place we could be. We're in a secure containment cell and we're on the opposite side of the site to the breach. I promise you we'll be fine. Distant gunfire can be heard. SCP-6083 is now visibly distressed and starts trembling. Jones: It's ok, James. It's ok. Everything's fine. We'll be alright. I promise. SCP-6083: (quietly) Miss, I'm scared. Jones: You poor thing. I'll protect you. Don't worry. Just trust me. Ok? SCP-6083 nods and hugs Jones tighter. Jones: There, there. You're gonna be alright. Jones pats SCP-6083's head and holds it closely. Jones: You want me to tell you that story then? It might take your mind off the scary stuff. SCP-6083 nods. [CONVERSATION REDACTED FOR INFORMATIONAL SECURITY PURPOSES] Jones: So that's about it. (pauses) Sorry. Now that I've said it all aloud, that story isn't actually very fun. I guess my life just isn't quite as interesting as yours. SCP-6083: That's not true Miss. Your story was really cool! Especially when the people you work for showed up. That was really exciting! Jones: Yeah, that's something you can never fault us for, I guess. The Foundation always keep things interesting, one way or another. (pauses) Say, do you want to play a game now? I think it'll still be a while before anyone else gets here, so we've probably got some more time to kill. SCP-6083: Ok. What can we play? Jones: Well, we have a couple games here that we've played before,3 but there's also some new stuff too. Jones looks through a small pile of board games stacked in the corner of SCP-6083's room for a short period, before picking out a game. She pauses and looks down for around half a minute, before turning towards SCP-6083. Jones: Want to play Pictionary? SCP-6083: Sure! Jones: Do you know how to play this one? SCP-6083: We draw pictures and try to guess what the other person is drawing. I'm not very good at drawing though… Jones: That's where the fun comes from! At least give it a shot, James. The two go on to talk and play Pictionary for just over 40 minutes before Jones stops mid sentence. SCP-6083: Miss? What's wrong? Jones appears not to notice SCP-6083's question. And begins rubbing her head apparently in pain. Jones: Ughh… What was I doing again? Why did I take out this game? SCP-6083: Miss? Are you ok? What's going on? Jones recoils for a moment, seemingly surprised at SCP-6083's presence. After a moment, she regains her composure and smiles at SCP-6083. Jones: Sorry James, I just zoned out for a second. Don't worry about that. The two resume their game for another 14 minutes before members of MTF-Nu-7 ("Hammer Down") arrive at the cell. Nu-7 Operative: We've got a researcher locked in with an anomaly here! Someone get this door open now! Nu-7 members force open the door before moving inside and separating Jones and SCP-6083. Once separated from Jones, SCP-6083 begins to cry. Jones: Wait! What are you doing? Stop! You're scaring the kid! Nu-7 Operative: Keep away from the anomaly. We'll subdue it momentarily. Jones: (struggling against the Nu-7 operatives) Stand down you morons! He's not dangerous! I- Jones starts to clutch her head in her hands. She starts shaking and looks visibly distressed. Jones: Just stand down. Please… The Nu-7 operators restraining SCP-6083 release it and it immediately runs to Jones, who hugs it tightly against her chest. … End Log. Addendum 6083-1 Shortly after the events documented in Interview Log 6083-3, Senior Researcher Jones fell victim to SCP-6083's anomalous effect and has been rendered unable to fulfil her role as SCP-6083's overseeing researcher. A replacement researcher will be assigned shortly.

SCP-5184 is a rodent specimen of the family Sciuridae1.

*** SCP-5184 rating: +30+–x ITEM #: SCP-5184 OBJECT CLASS: Euclid SPECIAL CONTAINMENT PROCEDURES: SCP-5184 is currently held in a small standard animal containment cell, designed to resemble a standard woodland environment. A feeding schedule has been implemented in accordance with SCP-5184’s dietary needs. Electrical devices, especially internet-accessible technology, are not allowed within SCP-5184’s containment cell. The only exception to this is in the case of interviews, during which it may utilize a specialized computer that only runs a word processor program. A photo of SCP-5184 taken prior to containment. DESCRIPTION: SCP-5184 is a rodent specimen of the family Sciuridae1. DNA sampling has shown that SCP-5184 is an unknown species of Sciuridae, showing similarities to multiple species. SCP-5184’s anomalous properties manifest when its teeth make contact with electrical wiring. SCP-5184 cannot be damaged by electricity and is able to send electrical signals out through its teeth to the device it is connected to. These signals operate as input commands, allowing SCP-5184 to access these electronics as though it were a human, despite not utilizing a mouse or keyboard. SCP-5184 can understand human language and communicate back through electronic devices. SCP-5184 has shown itself to be fluent in both English and Scottish Gaelic. Testing has shown that SCP-5184 has intelligence roughly comparable to a human. Significant addiction issues related to alcohol and smoking are ongoing with SCP-5184. While useful as incentives for testing, the health risks of a chipmunk consuming a full can of beer and smoking cigarettes regularly have been deemed too high to be allowed to continue. Addiction recovery programs are ongoing. Discovery: An investigation was launched into St. Andrew’s House in Edinburgh after reports from MTF Iota-10 ("Damn Feds") arose concerning a chipmunk continually eating electrical wires safely came concurrently with reports of electronic tampering from an unknown source pushing a second Scottish Independence Referendum. An example of some of the media SCP-5184 distributed through anomalous capabilities. SCP-5184 was located and attempts to bring it into Foundation custody by MTF Lambda-12 ("Pest Control") began but were halted after SCP-5184 threatened to destroy a significant amount of electronic government property. SCP-5184 was eventually lured into a beer-related trap and brought to the Foundation. Open Interview Log-5184 Credentials Accepted Interviewee: Dr. Dromeus Interviewer: SCP-5184 Notes: SCP-5184 communicated through a specialized computer running only a word processor. [BEGIN LOG] Dr. Dromeus: Good afternoon, SCP-5184. SCP-5184: get tae fuck arsehole! Dr. Dromeus: Okay, let’s try and be civil here and we can both get what we want. SCP-5184: kin ye git me outta this fucking cage then Dr. Dromeus: I’m afraid that won’t be possible. SCP-5184: kin ye get me a fucking beer then Dr. Dromeus: That can be arranged. SCP-5184: k ill talk Dr. Dromeus: I’m glad. So, it seems during your time at St. Andrew’s House you were trying to push for Scottish independence, am I right? SCP-5184: yer damn right FREEDOM FER SCOTLAND Dr. Dromeus: Okay, okay, let’s not get too riled up here. SCP-5184: ill git as riled as i damn well want ya dobber Dr. Dromeus: Okay. Well then, could you explain your interest in Scottish politics? SCP-5184: of course im interested in ma fucking glorious country. what are ya, dafty? Dr. Dromeus: If we can keep the insults slung to a minimum, that’d be excellent, thank you. SCP-5184: git fucked Dr. Dromeus: Okay then. So, your plan was to utilize your abilities to influence Scottish politics to push for another Scottish Independence Referendum, am I correct? SCP-5184: YE DAMN WELL KEN IT THEY KINNAE STOP US Dr. Dromeus: You do know the first one was rejected by popular opinion, right? What makes you think a second one will work? SCP-5184: ITLL WORK CUZ ILL MAKE IT WORK OUR BRAW COUNTRY DESERVES HER PLACE IN TAE WORLD Dr. Dromeus: I see. Now if you could calm down again- SCP-5184: fuck off Dr. Dromeus: -we’re almost done here. Could you please elaborate more on your abilities? SCP-5184: no Dr. Dromeus: Remember, cooperation is essential. You do want a beer, don’t you? SCP-5184: ye will never git ma secrets ya damn yank (Dr. Dromeus sighs) Dr. Dromeus: I’m on your side. Could you please help us out here? SCP-5184: no Dr. Dromeus: Fine, moving on. There’s just one final question: how did you reach Scotland? SCP-5184: ive always been here at least until ya put me in this dreich place. Dr. Dromeus: Interesting. I would like to know more. As you would know, there are no chipmunks native to Scotland. So- SCP-5184: what did ye say Dr. Dromeus: There are no chipmunks native to Scotland. SCP-5184: not true Dr. Dromeus: I’m afraid that’s a fact. All chipmunks in Scotland have been classified as invasive alien species. SCP-5184: yer lying Dr. Dromeus: Ah, so you didn’t know. I’m sorry. SCP-5184: but Scotland’s ma home Dr. Dromeus: I understand SCP-5184: shut up just shut up ya fucker it is nae true im done yer fucking interviews over (SCP-5184 disconnects from the computer and refuses to return to it) [END LOG] ADDENDUM 5184-1: As of the events of interview 5184-1, SCP-5184 has been in a depressive state. Demonstrated behavior includes eating less and refusing to conduct interviews. Dr. Dromeus has been reprimanded for the interview. Alright, I made a mistake. I thought this was something it knew and it clearly wasn’t. I propose we tread lightly and give it space for now. After all, it can’t be easy when your own home decides you’re not welcome. -Dr. Dromeus Footnotes 1. Commonly known as chipmunks.

SCP-1012 is a chord consisting of five sound tones, designated Frequencies A, B, C, D and E.

*** Item #: SCP-1012 Object Class: Keter Special Containment Procedures: The Foundation has implemented protocols to cancel or to reduce the risk of generation of three of the five constituent sound tones that comprise SCP-1012: Frequency B and Frequency D: Frequencies B' and D' are, respectively, the antiphases of Frequencies B and D. These antiphase frequencies cancel frequencies B and D, respectively, within the range of the broadcast. The Foundation operates sound detection and active noise cancellation broadcast devices in 36 locations worldwide, which continually monitor for Frequencies B and D, and, when appropriate, broadcast cancellation signals at Frequency B' or D'. Additionally, the Foundation has arranged for most of the world's electroacoustic transducers to monitor for Frequencies B and D and, when necessary, broadcast Frequencies B' or D'. This has been achieved through a combination of inserting design changes into the engineering specifications of most commonly-manufactured electroacoustic transducers manufactured since 1988, inserting Frequency B', D' or both into the transmission of broadcast media and the encoding of recorded media (including inserting design changes into the engineering specifications of recording appliances so that Frequency B', D' or both are automatically encoded), and by manipulating the supply frequencies of commercially transmitted and distributed electric power so as to cause sound equipment and other electric appliances to be capable of sympathetically generating Frequency B' or D'.1 Frequency C: In the wild, most instances of the generation of Frequency C had consisted of the whalesong of Balaenoptera svalbardi, the Svalbard whale. Through Foundation efforts, Balaenoptera svalbardi became extinct in 1982, thereby decreasing the likelihood that the tone would inadvertently be generated in a location near the generation of other constituent tones. All documentation that specifies the constituent sound tones of SCP-1012 is to be kept strictly confidential. Description: SCP-1012 is a chord consisting of five sound tones, designated Frequencies A, B, C, D and E. The tones of SCP-1012 are: Designation Frequency Remarks Frequency A 415.305██ Hz Within range of human hearing, slightly higher than G# Frequency B ████ kHz Ultrasonic Frequency C ████ Hz Infrasonic; lower than the range of human hearing but observable, at higher intensities, in the form of vibrations Frequency D ████ kHz Ultrasonic Frequency E ████ Hz Within range of human hearing but rarely used in the chromatic musical scale The generation of one or more, but less than all, of the constituent tones of SCP-1012 does not result in anomalous effects. The simultaneous generation of all five tones of SCP-1012 for a duration exceeding a few seconds affects2 the resonance of certain subatomic particles within range, causing them to disintegrate into their constituent elementary particles. Computer modeling predicts that a generation of SCP-1012 within close proximity of a mass, such as an astronomical body, is likely to result in an uncontrollable chain reaction resulting in the disintegration of virtually all matter comprising the mass. According to the model, once such a chain reaction is initiated, it will continue to progress whether or not the tones of SCP-1012 are continuing to be generated, until all available mass is affected (i.e., a CK-class scenario). Proposals to use SCP-1012 or a modified version as a defense mechanism against hostile extraterrestrial threats, including SCP-1548 and SCP-2838, have been rejected due to the potentially disastrous side effects of SCP-1012 testing. Footnotes 1. * Under normal conditions, Frequencies B' and D' are each substantially higher than the upper frequency limit for mammalian hearing and are therefore inaudible to humans, as well as other animals with a greater range of hearing such as dogs. However, it has been reported that some humans exposed to strong broadcasts of Frequency D' experience tinnitus. Under certain atmospheric and geological conditions (such as those prevailing in Taos, New Mexico and Bristol, UK), the broadcast of Frequencies B' or D' may be audible. Additionally, certain models of fluorescent lighting tubes and cathode ray tube televisions emit audible tones in sympathetic resonance with Frequency B' or D'. 2. The described result is predicted according to the cosmological model set forth in Foundation Document 8001.2552.KT.1012. Laboratory testing of the model is prohibited.

SCP-5289 is a 5x5x5 meter cube composed of concrete and rebar, located within the Site-19 barracks.

*** SCP-5289 rating: +48+–x Anomaly №: SCP-5289 Anomaly Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-5289 will remain at its place of discovery, but the area has been cordoned off from the rest of the Site. The flyer previously located on its eastern wall is held at Site-021 Site-01. Description: SCP-5289 is a 5x5x5 meter cube composed of concrete and rebar, located within the Site-19 barracks. The outer ceiling and underside have rusted iron plates attached to them; steel poles line each corner, presumably for structural support. The structure is bolted to the floor via four bronze stakes around each pole. Carbon dating suggests the entire structure is approximately 200 years old; attempts to open SCP-5289 have failed despite its relatively weak composition. Before its modern containment procedures were put into effect, a flyer was located on its eastern wall, presenting a diagram of a similar object. However, the pictured object had a door on its northern wall, and a stylized "W" above it. The flyer has been dated to have been created sometime in the late 1900s; it has been moved to Site-02 in order to discern if the pictured object exists. Recovery Log: Though it is unknown when SCP-5289 was moved to Site-19, records indicate it has been in the custody of the Foundation since its inception in ████. It is assumed SCP-5289 was previously owned by the American Secure Containment Initiative before it transformed into the current Foundation, as recovered documents describe a similar object being used as a prototype humanoid containment chamber. Incident Log (1): On 4/2/2021, Site-02 experienced a power outage which lasted for 5 hours. Though no large-scale breaches occurred during this time, the flyer taken from SCP-5289 was discovered to be missing. A search has been initiated. ➤ LEVEL 4 ACCESS REQUIRED, PLEASE INPUT CREDENTIALS. ➤ WELCOME, DIRECTOR. Incident Log (2): On 5/1/2021, O5-2 was reported missing after her attendant had entered her quarters to inform her of an upcoming council vote. The room was reported to be in disarray; O5-2's bed had been moved to block the door, and her room's window screen had been torn open. Despite a 48 hour search, O5-2 could not be found. During this time, searching through her computer files revealed a photograph of SCP-5289, captioned as "Containment Chamber," with an altered flyer on its eastern wall visible. It was included in a .zip folder, which also contained a list of Ethics Committee conflicts, and [REDACTED]. A lockdown order was relayed to Director Tilda Moose, and MTF Alpha-1 ("Red Right Hand") was dispatched to the area. Infrared scanning of the object indicated a humanoid entity was inside, slouched against the eastern wall in a sitting position. It is presumed that this entity is O5-2, though this cannot be confirmed. Alpha-1 made several attempts to open SCP-5289, but even with the usage of anomalous weaponry it was unable to be breached. After thirty hours, the team was called off by the O5 Council, but the Council requested the altered flyer be brought back to Site-01 for inspection. A digital scan is included below: Wow! I would stay in a silent room for all eternity, if it meant I would never hurt anyone. After popular demand, we've brought back a brand new set of Little Misters, a limited edition collection from Dr. Wondertainment! Find them all and become the Brand New Mr. Collector! 00. Mr. Prologue 01. Mr. Dark 02. Mr. Remembrance ✔ 03. Mr. Toxic 04. Mr. Collector 05. Mx. Voltage 06. ██. Gears 07. Mr. Memory 08. Mr. Nobody 09. Mr. Brainy 10. Ms. Seraph 11. Mr. Chronal and Mr. Dimension 12. Mr. Fish 13. Mr. Epilogue 14. Mr. Redd (Discontinued) « SCP-5288 | VoidLady | SCP-5290 » Footnotes 1. An unlisted facility staffed exclusively by high-ranking Foundation personnel, used to store and research anomalies of the highest sensitivity to Foundation security. cubedr-wondertainmentindestructiblemetallicmistersafescpstructure page revision: 17, last edited: 27 Jan 2022 04:57 Edit Rate (+48) Tags Discuss (6) History Files Print Site tools + Options Edit Sections Append Edit Meta Watchers Backlinks Page Source Parent Lock Page Rename Delete

SCP-1060 is a human female of Southeast Asian ethnicity, answering to the name of Adilah ████████.

*** Item #: SCP-1060 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: SCP-1060 is to be contained in a humanoid observation/detention cell at all times. During subject's daytime cycle, subject is to be provided with food items from the Site-33 cafeteria. During subject's nighttime cycle, subject is to be nourished with 0.8 kg of human placental material and provided with a basin of at least 4 liters of rice wine vinegar. Description: SCP-1060 is a human female of Southeast Asian ethnicity, answering to the name of Adilah ████████. Subject is fluent in the Malay language and somewhat conversant in Malaysian English. In interviews during subject's daytime cycle, subject has indicated that she is 22 years of age, is trained as an obstetrics nurse and is unaware of any unusual aspects of her physiology. In these interviews, subject has expressed a lack of awareness of her nighttime cycle physiology or activities and protests that she merely sleeps at night. During the daytime cycle, subject frequently demands to be released from containment or to be permitted to contact family members. During subject's daytime cycle, subject appears and behaves as a normal human female. During subject's nighttime cycle, which generally begins within 80 minutes after the subject falls asleep, subject's head and internal body organs (heart, lungs, liver and much of the digestive system and gut) detach from the rest of the subject's body with a sudden jerking motion, leaving a hole around the base of subject's neck. Subject's head and organs then levitate by means of an unknown process and freely float around the containment cell while subject's tongue—which increases to approximately 22 cm in length during this stage—flicks at the air in the manner of a snake. The remainder of subject's body remains lying in a resting position. Subject's upper and lower canine teeth also increase in length and sharpness during this stage. Under normal containment circumstances, subject will consume the provided placental material, using the dangling lengths of gut in the manner of prehensile limbs to lift the material to the subject's mouth. Following the feeding, the subject will dip the exposed organs into the vinegar, whereupon the organs shrink so that they can be stuffed back into the subject's body cavity. The head then reattaches to the body, leaving no visible seam or scar. Addendum SCP-1060.01A Following Incident 1060.01, no pregnant females are to be admitted into the containment chamber during SCP-1060's nighttime cycle. During Incident 1060.01, Researcher Marilyn ██████, who at that time was in her second trimester of pregnancy, entered the containment chamber during subject's nighttime cycle to top off the basin of vinegar. Immediately upon SCP-1060's detection of Ms. ██████'s presence in the chamber, SCP-1060 flew at Ms. ██████ at a great rate of speed, then used lengths of prehensile gut to bind and immobilize Ms. ██████. Subject then bit the researcher in the abdomen and consumed the fetus in situ, together with most of the rest of the uterus and its contents.

SCP-4301 is a 1.

*** Item #: SCP-4301 Object Class: Euclid Open Outdated Containment Procedures ... Special Containment Procedures (Outdated): SCP-4301 is currently considered a high-risk breach of VEIL Protocol due to possible spontaneous materialization in public areas. Operatives belonging to MTF Phi-3 ('Photobombers') are assigned with the task of containing SCP-4301 and transferring it to the Site-75 Humanoid Containment Wing, where it is to be contained in a standard Humanoid Containment Cell and guarded by at least 2 Site-75 guards. As SCP-4301's true purpose is still not known to the Foundation, MTF Phi-3 operatives are to exercise caution when attempting to capture and contain SCP-4301. Special Containment Procedures (Updated): SCP-4301’s current status is unknown. All personnel are to closely monitor Dr. Gilles for any future manifestations of SCP-4301. Should any future manifestations of SCP-4301 display signs of hostility towards Dr. Gilles or any other Foundation personnel, priority must be given for the immediate capture and containment of SCP-4301. Description: SCP-4301 is a 1.72 m male humanoid closely linked to Dr. Laura Gilles, the head researcher of Site-75. While the reason as to why SCP-4301 is only linked to Dr. Gilles is still not known, Dr. Gilles has stated that the humanoid resembles Timothy Gilles, her husband who had vanished in Nevada in 1987. SCP-4301 is normally incorporeal, and will only materialise if a picture is taken of Dr. Gilles using a camera, phone, or another photo-capturing device. SCP-4301 will materialise behind, beside, or in front of Dr. Gilles, and will subsequently dematerialise approximately 5 seconds after the taking of the picture. SCP-4301 will then subsequently appear in the taken pictures (designated as instances of SCP-4301-1) with Dr. Gilles. While instances of SCP-4301-1 commonly display SCP-4301 making a pose, SCP-4301 also has the capability of altering SCP-4301-1 depending on the pose Dr. Gilles makes, or the other objects in the original picture. Alterations can include changes to SCP-4301-1's background, setting, inserted filter, and Dr. Gilles' actions. Addendum 4301-1: Notable instances of SCP-4301-1 INSTANCE 3: Location in original photograph: Site-75 Cafeteria Time: 1945 hours Dr. Gilles' photographed activity: Smiling and sitting down on a cafeteria chair in front of a plate of food. Altered Result: No change in setting or Dr. Gilles' photographed activity. However, SCP-4301 is standing behind Dr. Gilles, smiling and waving at the camera. INSTANCE 21: Location in original photograph: Site-75 Corridor Time: 1235 hours Dr. Gilles' photographed activity: Making a finger gun pose. Altered Result: Setting altered to an old Western setting. Dr. Gilles and SCP-4301 stand in positions similar to that of a shootout. INSTANCE 34: Location in original photograph: Foundation Space Observation Gallery Time: 1023 hours Dr. Gilles' photographed activity: Posing in front of a model of the Foundation Shuttle. Altered Result: Setting altered to a setting of an unknown planet. Dr. Gilles and SCP-4301 pictured attempting to plant a Foundation flag. INSTANCE 41: Location in original photograph: Dr. Gilles' Room, Site-75 Time: 2112 hours Dr. Gilles' photographed activity: Smiling and holding a cupcake with a lit birthday candle. Altered Result: No change in setting or Dr. Gilles' photographed activity. However, the words 'Happy Birthday, Gilles!' are printed on the top left corner of the SCP-4301-1 instance. Open 'Interview 4301-A' file ... Interviewed: Dr. Laura Gilles Interviewer: Dr. Hubert King, Site-75 On-Site Psychologist Foreword: The interview was conducted at the personal request of Dr. Gilles. <Begin Log, 1634 hours> HK: Let's begin then. Dr. Gilles, you mentioned in your psychiatric session application form that you have been 'followed' by an unnatural entity that only appears in your photos. LG: That is true. The Foundation has classified the entity as an anomaly, and we are trying to capture it as of now. HK: So what seems to be the problem? LG: The entity looks like someone I know personally. My husband, in fact. HK: I see. And seeing him makes you uncomfortable? LG: More than that. It's like seeing someone again after a few years of separation from one another. You're happy to see them again, but you're not sure how much of the old 'them' is still in them. I had wished, prayed for his reappearance ever since he disappeared. Now that he has come back, I'm surprised and terrified at the same time. I wanted him to be by my side again after all these years, but instead, he only comes back when I take pictures of myself and disappears shortly after. I can't get a chance to talk to him, and that frustrates me. HK: But despite all that, you still love him? LG: Yes. That's why I'm trying to reach him, or at least the thing that acts like him. That's why I'm trying to capture it. HK: But, since the entity who looks like your husband doesn't talk to you when he appears, could it be that he just chooses not to talk to you? LG: Does it matter? HK: It matters a whole lot. If you're trying to reach him, or it, you must understand his decision and why he chooses to only do what he is doing. You can't force him to talk to you. That's just not how trust works. You need to trust that he will be by your side, and he needs to trust you too. If there is no trust, there will be no happiness for both you and him. LG: No. If I know him, he always trusts me to do the right thing, and capturing him is still the priority here. HK: I see. Good luck, then. LG: Thank you, doctor. <End Log, 1657 hours> Open 'Foundation Anomaly Containment Attempt 4301-Echo' file ... Foundation Anomaly Containment Attempt 4301-Echo: Personnel Involved: 6 MTF Phi-3 operatives, Dr. Laura Gilles Date and Time of Attempt: 02/07/14, 1416 hours Location: Site-75 Cafeteria Attempt Summary: After SCP-4301 materialised, 6 MTF Phi-3 operatives attempted to capture it before it dematerialised using H-17 Humanoid Containment Cuffs and H-23 Humanoid Incapacitators. During the capture attempt, SCP-4301 violently resisted and injured 3 of the 6 operatives before subsequently dematerialising. It is not known whether it has suffered any injuries from the attempt. Results of Containment Attempt: Failure. INSTANCE 42: Location in original photograph: Dr. Gilles' Room, Site-75 Time: 1235 hours Dr. Gilles' photographed activity: Standing in the room. Altered Result: No change in setting or Dr. Gilles' photographed activity. However, SCP-4301 can be seen huddled at the corner of the room with visible wounds on its body. The word ‘Why?’ is printed in red at the top left corner of the instance. Addendum 1: This is the only instance that was modified by SCP-4301 after Foundation Anomaly Containment Attempt 4301-Echo. Following the taking of this instance, SCP-4301 has failed to appear in any more of Dr. Gilles' pictures. Addendum 2: It has been noted that this particular SCP-4301-1 instance induces a state of guilt over any personnel who view it. Note: I’m sorry, Tim. I’m really sorry. - Dr. Gilles

SCP-1258 is a martial art of unknown origin.

*** Item #: SCP-1258 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: All materials relating to SCP-1258 are held in a locked document cabinet in Site-19, with access restricted to clearance level 4 and above. Any organisms showing any effect of practicing SCP-1258 should be considered an instance of SCP-1258-1 and terminated immediately unless part of an approved experiment. Standard Foundation searches for anomalous animal activity should be cross-referenced with SCP-1258 markers. Description: SCP-1258 is a martial art of unknown origin. Currently the Foundation has in its possession enough material in varying media to reconstruct several basic forms used to teach beginners, but little information on more advanced forms. SCP-1258-1 is any organism which has the knowledge and capability of practicing SCP-1258 independently. When SCP-1258 is practiced by human beings, there is no observed anomalous effect. The anomalous effects of SCP-1258 manifest when movements of the style are performed within view of a non-human mammal.1 A mild compulsive effect causes all such animals to cease any non-essential activity and begin watching the performer. After a short period of passive observation, animals will begin attempting to duplicate the movements, to the extent they are able. Due to anatomical differences, some animals are more capable than others of imitating the movements of SCP-1258, but regardless of skill, animals will continue practicing until either they are distracted by a pressing need (the need to eat, imminent danger, etc.) or the human performer stops or leaves their field of view. If an animal is permitted to observe and mimic SCP-1258 forms for a period of time,2 they will begin to develop human-like characteristics. Generally the process begins at the level of gross anatomy: quadrupedal organisms will develop leg musculature for a bipedal stance, they will develop opposable thumbs on their hands or equivalent structures, and will develop in size and stature to a minimum standing (bipedal) height of approximately 1 meter. (Animals already larger than this will stay the same size, though they will develop other quasi-human features.) Additionally, virtually all animals will develop larger brains, with expansion most often seen in areas relating to language.3 Subjects will continue to practice SCP-1258, even in the absence of an instructor or any materials related to SCP-1258; they may display knowledge of forms and movements which they have not been previously exposed to.4 Continual exposure will cause further expansion and development along these lines, and eventually development of the vocal cords (or equivalent structures), jaw, and esophagus. After enough exposure, subjects will be able to communicate verbally in human languages.5 Subjects' intelligence will increase appreciably as they continue to practice SCP-1258 routines and forms, usually to between 110 and 140 I.Q. as measured by standard Foundation tests. Eventually, test subjects will refuse to cooperate with humans in any capacity and will begin attempting to escape confinement by any means. For a partial list of animal experiments, refer to Experiment Log 1258. + Addendum: Origins of SCP-1258 - Addendum: Origins of SCP-1258 Addendum: Origins of SCP-1258: The time and exact place of origin of SCP-1258 are unknown. Some of its forms are superficially similar to the Korean martial art taekkyeon, which may place its development as early as the beginning of the Three Kingdoms Era (57 C.E.); however, due to taekkyeon's resurgence following the end of the Japanese occupation of Korea in 1945, and the cross-pollination between many East Asian martial arts, SCP-1258 may be a much more recent development, or may be of entirely different origin. Further investigation is impossible barring the discovery of more material. + Recovery Log - Recovery Log Recovery Log: SCP-1258 was first discovered as part of a routine internet search for anomalous artifacts, events, or persons. On █/██/201█, the YouTube channel of user 'WayFyre91,' real name Isaac Waymire, was found. Of the thirty-seven (37) videos on Waymire's channel, the first thirty-three (33) were of no value.6 In the thirty-third video, Waymire mentioned that he had begun taking martial arts lessons at a nearby school. The remaining 4 videos had been made within the space of roughly three (3) months. Transcripts of some of the relevant videos follow.7 Video: 01 <Begin transcript> 0:00:02: [Waymire steps into field of view, presumably after activating the camera.] 0:00:05-0:00:24: Waymire: Okay, uh, I just started taking lessons at the dojo, and … and you guys, you need to see this. I was practicing in front of Caesar8 and … just watch. 0:00:25-0:00:38: [Waymire briefly steps off-camera, returning with Caesar in his arms. He places Caesar on the floor.] 0:00:38-0:02:15: [Waymire performs an SCP-1258 routine. Caesar begins watching Waymire immediately. At 0:00:44, Caesar stands on his hind legs and begins imitating Waymire's movements. His balance appears to be poor and his range of motion is limited, but he attempts to follow the remainder of Waymire's routine. At the conclusion of his practice, Waymire begins laughing. He feeds a treat to Caesar, then picks him up and faces the camera.] 0:02:15-0:02:23: Waymire: My little warrior! 0:02:23-0:02:26: [Waymire moves behind the camera, and the recording ends.] Video: 02 <Begin transcript> 0:00:02:-0:03:56 [This video is a montage of multiple recordings of Waymire and Caesar practicing SCP-1258. There is no audible dialogue; instead, a German-language version of the song "Eye of the Tiger" plays over the video.] Notes: Due to the montage editing of this video, it is impossible to tell in what order the original sequences were filmed. However, Caesar is seemingly larger and has more developed musculature in his front and back legs. In certain shots, it appears that his muzzle is elongated as well, though the low resolution makes this difficult to verify. Video: 03 <Begin transcript> 0:00:02: [Extreme close-up of Waymire's face. He is outside his bedroom.] 0:00:03-0:00:27: Waymire: Okay, uh … Caesar's been acting … really weird lately, and … he … just watch this. 0:00:27-0:01:44: [Camera pans away from Waymire's face. The door to his bedroom is slightly ajar, and the camera is placed to sight into the bedroom. Caesar can be seen practicing an SCP-1258 form. Foundation martial arts experts note that this form is more advanced than had been seen in previous videos. Caesar is also noticeably larger, and has a much steadier bipedal stance.] 0:01:45-0:01:49: [Camera moves back to Waymire while Caesar continues to practice.] 0:01:50-0:02:12: Waymire: I … I'm not sure what's going on. I'm going to keep a close eye on him. Video: 04 <Begin transcript> 0:00:00: [Video opens on Caesar, in Waymire's bedroom. Waymire is not seen in the video; presumably he is holding the camera. Caesar is approximately twice his original size. His limbs are heavily muscled, and the skin has stretch marks, presumably from rapid growth. He is standing in what appears to be a basic SCP-1258 stance.] 0:00:01-0:00:11: Waymire: What is your name? 0:00:13-0:00:29: Caesar: I … am called … Caesar. 0:00:30-0:00:45: Waymire (breathing heavily): Why … how can you talk? 0:00:46-0:01:11: Caesar: I … have learned. Through learning … I became … more. 0:01:12-0:01:21: Waymire (stuttering): Www … what d-do … 0:01:22-0:01:24: Caesar: Ask it. 0:01:25-0:01:41: Waymire: What will you do with your … learning? 0:01:42-0:02:22: Caesar: I will … change … the world. I … will make us … free. I will … kill … the masters. 0:02:23-0:02:28: [Caesar stops speaking but continues to stare at the camera. Waymire's breathing can be heard as well.9] 0:02:29-0:02:31: Waymire: Is—is that enough? Can I— 0:02:31: [Caesar moves forward in a threatening manner. Camera jerks, likely due to Waymire flinching.] 0:02:32-0:02:45: Caesar: You … will not … ask! You will … tell … the masters! They … must know. 0:02:46-0:02:51: [Camera holds steady on Caesar until end of video.] Using the IP address Waymire had uploaded the videos from and clues within the videos themselves, the Foundation traced him to the town of █████████, Germany. Waymire was found dead in his apartment, with time of death approximately two days prior. Cause of death was determined to be blunt force trauma indicative of physical confrontation. Both of Waymire's legs and his right arm had been broken, along with seven ribs, and most of his internal organs were severely damaged or ruptured. Waymire's jaw was broken in several places, including two apparently post-mortem breaks. Foundation agents followed reports of attacks on hikers, as well as sightings of a "standing wolf" or "hairy dwarf", to a forest roughly east of █████████. The bodies of two hikers with wounds similar to Waymire's were found approximately seventeen kilometers from the city. Their bodies had been dragged into a small stream and partially eaten. Caesar, now designated SCP-1258-1-01, was eventually located and confronted after a three-day pursuit. Two agents were killed and four more injured; SCP-1258-1-01 was shot and killed. + Addendum: Document 1258-RX - Addendum: Document 1258-RX Addendum: Document 1258-RX: In January 201█, multiple incidents of wild animals attacking humans were reported in the town of ██████████, Colorado, USA. Some victims reported packs made up of multiple species, including predator and prey species together. The Foundation investigated and found widespread usage of SCP-1258. Sterilization of all wild and domesticated animals within a fifty-kilometer radius of the city, under guise of response to a rabies outbreak, was carried out without incident. Investigation led to a recently-opened dojo within the city; however, the dojo had burned down several days prior to the Foundation response.10 No remarkable equipment was found in the dojo, and most documents were burned beyond retrieval. The only recoverable fragment of note has been classified as document 1258-RX, and appears to be a handwritten, incomplete translation into English of another document. The original document, if one existed, was not found. Learn the ways of THE MASTERS!!! We can Anyone can learn to stand as tall as man other men and confront the world! WE CAN teach you to be (bigger? tougher? taller?). WE CAN make you give you a fighting chance against humanity (the world? society?) MAKE YOURSELF BETTER! (maybe "improve yourself"? "change yourself"?) Find a NEW WAY! We know the SECRETS OF THE MASTERS passed handed down through the millennia ages! If they will not see us as equals, then we will BECOME equals! [This line was struck through twice.] When we are all equals, we [The remainder of the document was destroyed.] Footnotes 1. Placental mammals only: marsupials display no anomalous effects. 2. Even a single exposure to SCP-1258 may be enough to cause these anomalous developments. Exact period of exposure necessary depends on multiple factors, including the species of subject, time spent performing, the skill of the human performer, and so forth. See Experiment Log below for further information. 3. These transformations require vastly increased nutritional intake, beyond what a healthy specimen should be able to consume normally. It is theorized SCP-1258 also speeds up metabolic processes in such a way as to allow for this high rate of growth. Without adequate nutrition, subjects' growth will be retarded, but will progress. 4. This anomalous knowledge is theorized to be another side-effect of exposure to SCP-1258. 5. Generally, animals will have access to the language and vocabulary they were exposed to prior to their development by SCP-1258; for example, an animal raised by a English speaker will have retroactively "learned" the English they heard their owner speaking. Furthermore, most animals also show language acquisition skills comparable to a human toddler, allowing them to learn at an accelerated rate. 6. Major topics included Waymire reviewing films or video games, responding to friends' videos, or diary-style entries about his personal life. 7. Dialogue has been translated from the original German. 8. Waymire's pet dog, apparently a terrier mix. Exact breed composition is unknown. 9. According to Foundation analysis, Waymire's labored breathing is probably due to an agitated emotional state, although he may also have suffered damage to his throat, lungs, or thoracic cavity. 10. The cause of the fire was unclear.

SCP-2206 is a series of radio broadcasts that began occurring throughout the continental United States in 2008.

*** Item #: SCP-2206 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: Containment of SCP-2206 is currently unfeasible due to the number and distribution of its broadcasting locations. To combat growing public awareness of SCP-2206, a mass disinformation campaign has been launched with the goal of disguising SCP-2206 as a work of fiction. To this end, the following actions have been, will be, and/or are continuing to be taken: The creation of a fictional website for SCP-2206, describing it as a radio show parodying popular sports talk radio. The creation of SCP-2206 merchandise, sold through an online storefront on the aforementioned website. The creation of advertisements for SCP-2206, memetically engineered to decrease listeners' willingness to believe that SCP-2206 is anything other than a work of fiction. The staging of live shows emulating SCP-2206 broadcasts, performed by Mobile Task Force Lambda-30 ("Sports Casting Performers"). Efforts to locate and neutralize the source of SCP-2206 are ongoing. Description: SCP-2206 is a series of radio broadcasts that began occurring throughout the continental United States in 2008. These broadcasts mainly occur during the local evening, usually coinciding with a region's baseball games. While it is possible to trace individual instances of SCP-2206 back to their apparent broadcasting locations, no source has been found for them. It is currently theorized that SCP-2206 is an inter-universal broadcast from an alternate universe significantly different from our own. The content of SCP-2206 is a sports commentary and discussion show. While the focus of this show is a sport referred to as baseball, this sport is significantly different from any known version of baseball played on Earth.1 Differences include: Batters do not receive walks. The only way to get on base is to successfully hit the ball. Bats are constructed from aluminum or lightweight composites, instead of the northern white ash wood typically used in the construction of professional-level bats. A larger playing field. The distance between bases has been stated as being 180 feet (approximately 55 meters), while the distance between home plate and the furthest point of the back wall has been given as 1600 feet (approximately 490 meters). High-strength fences (constructed from various different materials) of "great height" entirely surround the field for the protection of spectators. On-field fights between opposing teams are common, expected, and considered a legitimate manner of contesting an umpire's call. Serious injuries and fatalities are significantly more common. The use of steroids and other performance-enhancing drugs is mandatory. Players are highly divergent from baseline humans. Genetically-modified and cybernetically-enhanced humans, sapient ectomorphs, androids, and other anomalous humanoids are present in some combination on all teams. Fan superstitions appear to be capable of actually affecting the outcome of a game. The commentators for SCP-2206, who are by all indications baseline humans, treat these differences as usual and normal, providing commentary very similar in tone and style to that of a normal sports talk radio show. The following teams are known to currently play SCP-2206 baseball. Team League2 MLB Counterpart Notes Anaheim Avengers American Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim While it has been stated that they are the second team in history from Anaheim, it is currently unknown what happened to the first. Atlanta Aztecs National Atlanta Braves In lieu of an opening pitch, the team starts their home games by ritually sacrificing a B-list celebrity. Baltimore Terrapins American Baltimore Orioles Although they are named after the Maryland state reptile, their mascot is apparently a three-ton, acid-spitting lizard capable of launching poisonous spines from its back. It is possible that in SCP-2206's universe, this is the state reptile of Maryland. Boston Red Shirts American Boston Red Sox Currently holds the record for most fatalities sustained in a single game, set during a 1903 game against the New York Highlanders. After losing their entire roster, the Red Shirts began drafting spectators onto the team. They eventually won 1-0. Chicago Black Sox American Chicago White Sox Conspired to fix the 1919 World Series, which they won in a four-game sweep, to the confusion of all involved. Chicago Orphans National Chicago Cubs The team has been without a manager, owner, and coaching staff since 1897, and were evicted from their ballpark in 1902. Despite this, they are one of the most successful teams in SCP-2206 baseball, having claimed over 20 World Series titles. Cincinnati Communists National Cincinnati Reds Between 1952 and 1993, the entire team was illegal under US law. Cleveland Exiles American Cleveland Indians The team has not played a single game in Cleveland since 1900. Colorado Blizzards National Colorado Rockies Their stadium is perpetually buried under a meter of snow, providing them with a significant home field advantage. Detroit Wolverines American Detroit Tigers Members of the team appear to be immortal. Florida Flounders National Miami Marlins As the only entirely amphibious team, they represent the United States in the Pisces Cup, a five-game series played against the Atlantis Aquatics. By Atlantean lore, the possessor of the cup has fishing rights to the North Atlantic. Houston Colt .45s American Houston Astros Singularly responsible for the 1972 ban on the use of firearms during play. Kansas City Kings American Kansas City Royals Actually two teams, one from Kansas City, Missouri, and one from Kansas City, Kansas, both of which claim to be the rightful heirs to the title of Kansas City Kings. Los Angeles Defectors National Los Angeles Dodgers Originally the Brooklyn Excelsiors, in 1958 the entire team, stadium, and ownership were transplanted to Los Angeles overnight, narrowly escaping an assassination plot orchestrated by the New York Highlanders. Minnesota Clones American Minnesota Twins Notable for being the first team to make extensive use of cloned players, earning them their name. Their roster has remained unchanged since 1985, consisting entirely of genetic clones of previous players. Montreal Volcanoes National Washington Nationals Their home games are played inside the active volcano of Mount Royal3. This resulted in the incineration of the entire team, along with their opponents, the Toronto Razors, and thousands of spectators when the volcano erupted during Game Five of the 2005 Pearson Cup. New York Highlanders American New York Yankees Repeatedly referred to as "The Most Hated Team in Baseball" by various SCP-2206 commentators, the New York Highlanders have a history of using tactics considered underhanded even by SCP-2206 standards. After forcing their fellow New York teams, the New York Gothams and the Brooklyn Excelsiors, to flee the city in 1958, they remained the sole SCP-2206 baseball team in New York until the formation of the New York Urbans in 1961. New York Urbans National New York Mets Nicknamed "The Murderin' Urbans" in 1969, due to their assassination of the entire roster of the Baltimore Terrapins on the eve of Game One of that year's World Series. As a direct result, off-field murder was banned the following season. This ban would not be lifted until 2000. Oakland Elephants American Oakland Athletics Spectators are physically incapable of forgetting their games. Philadelphia Phantoms National Philadelphia Phillies From their inception, the entire team has been cursed to haunt their stadium as "ghosts"4 until they can go an entire season without losing a game. Their ability to complete this goal is hindered by their inability to play away games. Phoenix Firebirds National Arizona Diamondbacks First team to play in a stadium with a fireproof roof. Pittsburgh Rebels National Pittsburgh Pirates Staged an uprising against the Commissioner of Baseball in 2010, which ended in failure after the Commissioner killed his assailants with his "death stare". San Diego Whales National San Diego Padres Players have repeatedly been the targets of Japanese whaling ships, despite not actually being whales. San Francisco Ghosts National San Francisco Giants Originally the New York Gothams, in 1958 the entire team, stadium, and ownership were transplanted to San Francisco overnight, after narrowly failing to escape an assassination plot orchestrated by the New York Highlanders. Seattle Storms American Seattle Mariners The entire team was banned for the duration of the 2009 season after using divine intervention from multiple weather gods5 to influence the outcomes of their games, including the American League Championship Series. SCP-2206 baseball rules limit teams to one patron deity per season. Seattle Autopilots National Milwaukee Brewers The team's roster includes two self-driving cars, four unmanned aerial vehicles, and three autonomous vacuum cleaners. It is unknown how they are able to play baseball. St. Louis Cardinals National St. Louis Cardinals Although they share a name with our universe's St. Louis Cardinals, the SCP-2206 Cardinals have an actual Catholic Cardinal as their mascot, who is an ordained bishop of the Roman Catholic Church and a member of the College of Cardinals. This is in contrast to our universe's St. Louis Cardinals, who do not. Tampa Bay Devils American Tampa Bay Rays Player salaries are paid in human souls. Texas Renegades American Texas Rangers In 1993 the entire team quit baseball and formed a basketball team, only to return to baseball in 1995. Toronto Razors American Toronto Blue Jays As part of Ontario's ongoing war against facial hair, the team offers free shaves to spectators. Footnotes 1. The following sections make extensive use of baseball terminology. Those unfamiliar with the terms used are advised to refer to the Foundation's primer on American baseball. 2. As with normal Major League Baseball, SCP-2206 baseball teams are divided into an American League and a National League. 3. Our universe's Mount Royal is extinct. 4. Believed to be Class-A Ectomorphs based on SCP-2206 commentary. 5. The existence of which appears to be public knowledge in SCP-2206's universe.

SCP-5037 is a series of 'locked room' murders committed via anomalous means, localized to residential properties within the city limits of Lubbock, Texas and occurring approximately once a month.

*** Item #: SCP-5037 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: Foundation elements embedded within police and emergency services are to maintain surveillance for and investigate potential SCP-5037 instances. Upon formal identification of an SCP-5037 instance, the Foundation is to assume full situational control. Amnestics are to be administered as necessary, media coverage is to be preempted or suppressed, and a suitable cover story that describes alternate circumstances for the SCP-5037 instance is to be developed. Social relations of and individuals proximate to the victims of the SCP-5037 instances are to be taken in for questioning and monitored thereafter. The properties in which SCP-5037 instances occur are to be purchased or otherwise acquired by the Foundation and kept under surveillance. Foundation web crawler "ERIKA" is to scan for key words indicative of online discussion of the first three SCP-5037 instances, which is to be examined and intervened in as necessary to ensure informational security for the remainder of SCP-5037 instances and the Foundation. Description: SCP-5037 is a series of 'locked room' murders committed via anomalous means, localized to residential properties within the city limits of Lubbock, Texas and occurring approximately once a month. All SCP-5037 instances have occurred within rooms that were locked or otherwise unable to be accessed from the outside, with no means or signs of entry or exit detectable by conventional means. SCP-5037 instances have invariably occurred when there are no other persons within the residence, typically only discovered when social relations of the victims enter the residence and discern the person within the 'locked room' is unresponsive, followed by alerting authorities. No pattern or connection between the victims of SCP-5037 has been determined. They differ in age, gender, ethnicity, and occupation and have not been determined as ever having met or corresponded with each other. The circumstances of SCP-5037 have proven identical across all instances. The victim is discovered lying in the approximate center of the 'locked room', facing upwards with their hands clasped over their chest, legs straightened, and their eyes closed with visible tear stains. They are always smiling. The cause of death for all victims has been determined as identical to the effect of a fatal benzodiazepine1 overdose. The central nervous system was subject to severe depression, resulting in coma followed by death. However, forensic examination has consistently shown no traces of drugs within the body, and additional examination has determined the physiological alteration and ensuing death were near instantaneous to an extent not possible by conventional means. All victims have had clasped within their hands a blue Post-It brand sticky note, with text identified as being written with a BIC Atlantis Comfort pen. A transcript is available below. This is a suicide note Please send a detective We are sorry We don't want to die History: The first known instance of SCP-5037 occurred on 1/9/20██, when a man named Charles Martin was found deceased within his locked windowless 'man cave'. As a result of the circumstances he was found in and his cause of death being insufficiently examined, foul play was not suspected and it was reported as a suicide. The second known instance occurred on 2/7/20██, when the corpse of a woman named Debra Becker was discovered in the locked bedroom of her apartment by a neighbor. Though also reported as a suicide, the identical circumstances of the two deaths resulted in significant media coverage and speculation of a potential 'suicide cult', with some also theorizing the possibility of foul play. The third instance, occurring on 3/3/20██ with a young child named Wayne Roberts found dead within his dedicated room for play, was deemed foul play and garnered national media coverage. The deaths were now regarded as part of the "Triple Locked Room Murder Mystery", prompting a large scale police investigation. Foundation assets in Lubbock stepped in and assumed situational control. The anomalous nature of the deaths was discovered and they were retroactively declared instances of SCP-5037. Though it was no longer possible to prevent public knowledge of the first three murders and their similarity, targeted suppression and monitoring of coverage and discussion was put into place to maintain informational security. Eleven further instances of SCP-5037 occurred over the next ten months and were successfully kept from public knowledge, with minimal new information gleaned. Due to the investigation stalling and in an attempt to satisfy the second line of the notes found with SCP-5037, which requested a 'detective', the personnel assigned to investigate SCP-5037 have become subject to regular rotation. On, 1/3/20██, Investigator Isaac Acharya and Agent Audie Pallas of the Department of Analytics were assigned to the investigation of SCP-5037. Investigation Log 5037.1 Investigation Log 5037.1 Preliminary Meeting Transcript Date: 1/3/20██ [BEGIN LOG] Investigator Acharya: I suppose I should start this audio log with an introduction, since there is something of a need to contextualize my presence. My name is Isaac Acharya, former private eye and a Foundation employee for… a number of years now. I hold the somewhat unique position within the Foundation as an investigator with… well, Level 0 security clearance. I promise that isn't a joke, though I'll admit I'll probably make a few since we're in the informal bit of things. Agent Pallas: I've known him for around ten minutes, and I can already tell he's going to. Investigator Acharya: The vote of confidence is appreciated, Agent Pallas. Now, I have Level 0 clearance since my primary role within the Foundation has nothing at all to do with the anomalous. It's my job to investigate crimes committed against or by Foundation employees via conventional means. I've run the gamut from theft and blackmail all the way to homicide. In practice though, I spend most of my time finding… lost items and pets. Investigator Acharya pauses for around ten seconds, presumably for comedic effect Investigator Acharya: Setting that awkward pause aside, I genuinely do enjoy my work. I'm the kind of guy satisfied by putting smiles on people's faces. Aside from that however, I'm occasionally called upon in another capacity. Another, slightly longer pause Investigator Acharya: There are particular anomalies that sometimes need a fresh eye from someone used to investigating but who knows nothing about anomalies, and thus has no preconceived notions. There are some anomalies that are so mundane in nature that it's best to hit them from that angle. And there are probably some anomalies that you just need someone who knows nothing about anomalies to tackle, like if they, I don't know, shapeshift into the worst thing you've ever seen or something. Though, I only know that secondhand. A quiet laugh Investigator Acharya: To maintain that handy dandy Level 0 clearance, I get hit up with amnestics after every time I work with anomalies. Until then though, I'm here assigned to SCP-5037, because it barely qualifies as anomalous and because this investigation's hit so much of a brick wall they might as well scrape the bottom of the barrel and give me a try. Agent Pallas: clears throat And I am Agent Audie Pallas, of the Department of Analytics. I am to serve as Investigator Acharya's liaison with the greater Foundation due to his unusual clearance situation and provide him whatever classified information I am capable of giving him. I am also only somewhat begrudgingly to serve as his assistant and bodyguard for the duration of this investigation. Investigator Acharya: It's much appreciated Agent Pallas. I don't expect this investigation to get dangerous, but my aptitude for combat is roughly equivalent to wet tissue paper, so please do save the sobbing mess I'll be if things get rough. Agent Pallas pauses and sighs Agent Pallas: Please do expect the investigation to get dangerous. It will make my life easier. Now then, fun first day of preschool introduction time is over. Investigator, what is your preliminary assessment of SCP-5037? Investigator Acharya: That's the million dollar question, isn't it? What to make of suicide themed murders of people with no history of suicidal behavior and no connections to each other? Murders with no known ritualistic element, occurring seemingly painlessly behind closed doors and going out of their way to give any potential suspect alibis, continuing despite not being properly reported and getting notoriety? Agent Pallas: The operating theory of the investigation thus far is that it's an anomalous entity that can phase through walls or teleport or some such but only under particular conditions, and that it derives either sustenance or pleasure simply from killing with no additional frills attached. In this scenario, the note is pure nonsense it leaves mockingly or a cryptic riddle of some sort. Investigator Acharya: … What would your own personal theory be, Agent Pallas? Agent Pallas: I am disinclined to share theories I'm uncertain of because of a certain traumatic incident involving a phone game, but… I think the note is pretty important. Investigator Acharya: We're of one mind. The operating theory certainly ticks all the boxes… but that doesn't make it the answer. It's perhaps an attitude inappropriate for dealing with an anomaly, but I'm positive there's a higher purpose and logic to these murders, and the notes indicate it. The locked room and the method of death are important of course, but there's nothing in particular that can be deciphered about them just yet. The note is the key to this. Agent Pallas: Well then mister brilliant detective, what have you parsed from the note? Investigator Acharya: Let's begin with the assumption that the culprit is speaking for itself in the notes, considering it presumably wrote them. The culprit says this is its suicide note; it's announcing it's going to die by its own actions. Skipping the second line for now, it's apologetic. It says it doesn't want to die right afterwards… it can be read as it being apologetic that it doesn't want to die. This might mean the murders are necessary for it not to die, and it feels sorry for that. Of course, that it's written in first person plural might be of note. It might be the intent of multiple culprits, or multiple minds, or a collective. Agent Pallas: Hell of a contradiction, isn't it? Saying it's going to commit suicide but that it doesn't want to die… though that might mean it's not committing suicide of its own will. Investigator Acharya: That's certainly one interpretation, and likely correct, but as well it's true that people rarely commit suicide solely because they want to die. It's because they want to stop their own suffering. It certainly lines up with this entity demonstrating the capacity for remorse. It doesn't want to die, but it's suffering, and it regrets. Agent Pallas: Empathizing a bit much with something that's killed over a dozen people, aren't you? I'm not gonna say you shouldn't because it's inhuman, but it's still a murderer. Investigator Acharya: Maybe so, but perhaps that perspective might be just what's necessary to solve this mystery. If you're worried about my resolve, don't be. I may feel for it, but I'm not going to let it keep killing people. Agent Pallas: As long as you get the picture. Investigator Acharya: Picture gotten. Now, as for the second line, that's what's most intriguing. It's requesting a detective. If it was because it wanted to lure in and kill that which could jeopardize it, we would have Foundation casualties by now. No, it wants a detective because it wants to be solved. It wants to be found out. There's no other reason to request a detective to come to a crime scene. Isn't that something? An anomaly that wants to be solved… do you know of any? Agent Pallas: You could probably count them on your hands. Generally anomalies abhor being solved, being made to conform to a single answer or framework. It's why they're anomalous. Each and every one of them are mysteries that refuse to be solved. Investigator Acharya: And yet this one, for some reason, wants to be solved. If we consider the lines as connecting to each other, then perhaps a detective is a requisite component, necessary to it not wanting to die. Perhaps the detective is part of its suicide. Agent Pallas: We've had over a dozen different investigators assigned to this case, and the contents of the note haven't changed once. Maybe its request won't ever be satisfied, or can't be satisfied. Anomalies don't operate on logic. You can't always answer them. Investigator Acharya: And it's exactly that attitude I can't accept. That we haven't figured them out yet doesn't mean we never will. I'm sure there's some theoretical upper limit to human knowledge, but I don't give a toss. All I know and all I care about is that I have been presented with a mystery, that my presence as a detective has been requested, and that the lives of innocent people are at stake. I will find the truth. I've failed as a detective the moment I think I can't. I'm not going to stop until the mystery is solved. Agent Pallas: … Well, here's hoping that attitude gets us somewhere. Investigator Acharya: Again, appreciate the vote of confidence. Speaking of confidence, going back to the note, there is one last thing I noticed and am confident about. Agent Pallas: Let's hear it. Investigator Acharya: Between the blue sticky note and the kind of pen you'd get in the school supplies section of a store, the quality of the handwriting itself, and the lines themselves… I would say the note feels like it was written by someone in middle school, maybe in high school at latest. A teenager. A kid. [END LOG] Addendum.5037.1: On 1/9/20██, SCP-5037-15 occurred in a locked walk-in closet with a woman named Dorothy Walker. While all other circumstances remained identical to previous SCP-5037 instances, the contents of the note found with SCP-5037-15 had changed. A transcript follows. This is a suicide note Please solve us Please don't solve us We are sorry We don't want to die Investigation Log 5037.2 Investigation Log 5037.2 Meeting Regarding SCP-5037-15 Date: 1/9//20██ [BEGIN LOG] Investigator Acharya: We were too late. We couldn't figure it out in time to save her. Agent Pallas: Investi-… Isaac, it isn't your fault. People a hell of a lot more qualified couldn't figure it out. It comes with the job. Sometimes, there's nothing you can do. But now something's changed, thanks to you, and because of her sacrifice we'll solve this. Investigator Acharya: You don't get to call it a sacrifice. This woman didn't agree to be sacrificed. She didn't want to die. Agent Pallas: … You're right. I'm sorry. Investigator Acharya lets out a drawn out sigh Investigator Acharya: No, I should apologize. That was too harsh of me. You're right that her death won't be in vain. We might not have been able to save her, but we're not going to let anyone else die. I've been recognized as the detective. I will solve this mystery. Agent Pallas: And I'll be there to assist. I'm not about to give up, not when mister Level 0 here is refusing to. Investigator Acharya: Heh. Honestly, you're a pretty damn inspiring liaison, assistant, and bodyguard yourself. With the two of us, I'm sure we can do this. Let's get to it. Agent Pallas: The changed wording… again there's that contradiction. It wants to be solved, but it also doesn't want to be solved. Still a suicide note, but still not wanting to die. Investigator Acharya: The order, I think, is important. It wants to be solved, but then it doesn't want to. That suggests a limit or threshold. It wants to keep being solved, but past a certain point it doesn't. It wants us to eat away at this mystery, but it doesn't want to be completely solved. Agent Pallas: There's that plural being emphasized again as well. Solve us… it's an odd wording. You'd think the culprit would ask to be caught, or figured out. Normally I wouldn't think twice about odd wording with an anomaly, but it seems to think your detective style suits it, so. Investigator Acharya: They do say that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, so much appreciated. As it happens, I agree. If we consider the wording to be important, it is odd that it'd ask us to 'solve us, the culprits'… After around a minute's silence, Investigator Acharya audibly bolts up from his seat. Investigator Acharya: That's it! Damn it, it all makes sense now! Agent, you're brilliant! Agent Pallas: Compliment bashfully declined, but what do you mean? Investigator Acharya: We've been operating under the assumption that the 'we' and the 'us' could only ever refer to some culprit, but a key component of some locked room murders is that there isn't always one. Someone accidentally sets off an elaborate trap, or indeed commits suicide that becomes mistaken for homicide. We're not being asked to solve a culprit or culprits that don't necessarily exist. We've been asked to solve a mystery, a mystery made up of… Agent Pallas: … murders. That's why there's been a note attached to every murder. It's that absurdly literal. The mystery, speaking in plural because it's made up of multiple murders, requested a detective to solve it. The mystery is keeping itself from dying by adding to itself, and that means adding more deaths that are clearly part of the same mystery. It's a sapient abstract concept, a living mystery actualizing itself in reality. Investigator Acharya: Can't say I fully understand what you just said, but I do get that the note is written from the viewpoint of a mystery, and that being investigated and speculated about is what gives a mystery its meaning as a mystery. To that end it wants to be solved, but once it's completely solved it ceases to be a mystery. That's why it wants to be solved but also doesn't want to be. It's killing itself in parts just to stay alive. Agent Pallas: This is some fucking painful hindsight. Hell, the database page itself says 'SCP-5037 is a series of murders', and that's quite literally what it is in its entirety. But… knowing what it is won't stop it. There's nothing to stop it from continuing to add to itself. Investigator Acharya: We haven't fully solved the mystery just yet. You said that the plural in the note was because it was made up of murders, yeah? Agent Pallas: That would be the seeming conclusion, yes. Investigator Acharya: Then why was it plural in the note found with the very first? Agent Pallas: … Oh goddamn it, the hindsight just got even more painful. I can't believe we didn't catch this. No, I can. Of course the Foundation overlooked this. Investigator Acharya: Now it's your turn to clue me in? Agent Pallas: One month before the first instance of SCP-5037, there was a prominent locked room murder right here in Lubbock. The Foundation looked into it at the time, and looked into it again after SCP-5037 was designated, but dismissed it as unrelated. All the teens and pundits salivating on the Internet about the 'Triple Locked Room Murder Mystery' considered it related, and we encouraged that to get them farther from what we thought was the truth. Investigator Acharya: Why was it dismissed as unrelated? Agent Pallas: Because it wasn't anomalous at all fucking whatsoever… and because it wasn't a closed room murder like it was reported to be. Agent Pallas pauses and sighs Agent Pallas: It was a suicide. [END LOG] Addendum.5037.2 On 1/10/20██, Lubbock police chief Carson Grimes was induced by the Foundation to confess to the crime of falsifying police records in order to report the suicide of his 15-year old son Nelson Grimes via sleeping pill overdose as a 'locked room' murder. He was additionally made to confess that the first three instances of SCP-5037 were also suicides he falsely reported as 'locked room' murders, produced via fabricated evidence and coercion of witnesses. After three months following this course of action without additional SCP-5037 instances, SCP-5037 is pending reclassification as Neutralized. Addendum.5037.3 On 4/9/20██, former Lubbock police chief Carson Grimes committed suicide in his prison cell, having overdosed on sleeping pills he requested in order to deal with recurring nightmares featuring his son. Footnotes 1. A class of drugs typically known for sedative effects, often simply referred to as sleeping pills

SCP-5174 is a brain-based bot network that is intended to terminate selected hosts in Oneiroi Space1.

*** Item #: SCP-5174 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: Due to the irregular nature of the manifestations of SCP-5174, containment is to be focused on observation and investigation. Foundation employed scouts within neutral and pro-Foundation collectives are to report activity involving host abnormalities and rapid-onset hivemind collapse to MTF Omicron Rho ("The Dream Team") for inquiry. Physical sites of SCP-5174 generation are to be examined, then disassembled by Foundation security personnel. Instances of SCP-5174-1 are to be stored in standard object containment once decommissioned. Description: SCP-5174 is a brain-based bot network that is intended to terminate selected hosts in Oneiroi Space1. The mechanism of SCP-5174 involves the involuntary exploitation of "non-dreamers," in order to create a specific desired effect; of which the most common are tasks that require significant cognitive function to process. Note that victims of SCP-5174 are not actually accessing Oneiori dream worlds (such a process requires the completion of the Oneiori Joining Technique), rather their mental energy2 is rerouted to a central attacker who then focuses on a Oneiorific node. The transmission method of SCP-5174 is an autonomous drone (refered to as SCP-5174-1) which emits malicious, infected brainwaves to physically compromised individuals. The combined mental energy is then collated through SCP-5174-1 which then prepares SCP-5174 for activation. The amount of "non-dreamers" that are used for SCP-5174 is limited to the spatial distribution of SCP-5174-1 for that particular instance. In Oneiroi Space, the botnet manifests in several ways, the most common of which is as millions of SCP Foundation Researchers armed with glitter-guns. The intense cerebral load placed, often, kills the host of the collective and causes critical infrastructure loss for the dream group3 of that particular host. It is theorized that multiple varieties of SCP-5174 currently operate within Oneiori Space. However, the development of mobile collectives and "jumping" hosts within the noosphere in recent decades has made precise identification difficult. The first and most widespread variation known in Oneiori West4 as the "TFFS5 brain parasite," was dismantled in 2018. Before deconstruction, the first instance of SCP-5174 is believed to have killed 38 hosts and their associated collectives. The following is an abridged list of dreamworlds destroyed by this initial version of SCP-5174. Host Name: Imperator Aiaoai Zurchol Oiiit Hivemind Name: The Glorious Emirate of Oneiroi East Human Population #: ~15,000,000 Physical Location: Within a trashcan on the beach of Random Island, Canada Metaphysical Description: “The Glorious Emirate of Oneiroi East” was a uber-fantasy, low-concept hivemind that was the sister collective to Oneiroi West. Investigation showed that most of this particular collective was constructed of and worshipped the Daevite spirit "Hahgwehdaetgan. Circumstances Regarding Collapse: Imperator Oiiit, the host of “The Glorious Emirate of Oneiroi East,” received a message on 3/1/2018 detailing steps of an ultimatum to either shut down operations or to face complete destruction. According to after action reports, the ultimatum was attached to a manifesto describing the "cowardice of death" and "the strength of 'real' flesh." Oiit ignored the message and later that day the collective was shutdown by SCP-5174. Host Name: Real Name Unknown Hivemind Name: AAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUGGGGHHHHH (12 A's, 6 U's, 5 H's) Human Population #: ~??? Physical Location: Variable. The location of the hivemind would change depending on the visitor. The location would jump to the visitor's mother's brain. Metaphysical Description: “AAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUGGGGHHHHH” was an indetermined, high-concept collective that would alter itself depending on the mind that would enter it. The space within the collective would transform into a space resembling the inhabitant’s childhood. Infamous as a hideout for Daevite pacifists during the Third Occult War. Circumstances Regarding Collapse: Real Name Unknown, the host of “AAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUGGGGHHHHH,” was sent a similar ultimatum by SCP-5174. The attached manifesto was slightly altered and contained reference to "the unnatural lengthened lives led by dreamers who hang to their pasts." Host Name: SCP Foundation Dreamer Azmaray Marwat Hivemind Name: Sanctioned Site √-2 Human Population #: ██████████████████████████████████████████ Physical Location: Site-02 Metaphysical Description: Semi-infinite pink containment planet, often used for non-humanoid mental viruses. For more details, contact Foundation Dreamer Overseer Maider Berezi. Circumstances Regarding Collapse: Marwat received a message from SCP-5174, calling for help in their mission to "kill and destroy everything within all dream-worlds for the benefit of those tempted by its whispers and false bodies. None shall escape physical form." After Marwat responded with a reaffirmation of Foundation ideology to not harm anomalous entities, SCP-5174 invaded Site √-2 and collapsed the planet. Discovery: SCP-5174 was brought to the Foundation's attention by the "All Being’s Collective of Xiupania," which sent envoys into the dreams of various Foundation researchers. The message was the following pseudo-limerick. You are always a bad group. But we need some help, nincompoops! An evil thing has come. And will cause us to succumb. Hey dumbass, you will find the culprit in Guadeloupe. A team of Foundation security personnel was sent to Basse-Terre, the capital city of Guadeloupe. There it was discovered the brains of patients admitted to Vieux Habitants National Hospital were compromised by SCP-5174 and were being co-opted for the purposes of the central brain. The compromised individuals were de-anomalized through a severing of the forced Oneiorific connection. During the dismantling of the first SCP-5174 network, a document was found taped to a computer monitor. AUTOMATED LETTER: DO NOT DISCARD Dear Karcist Tuuslar, Thank you for ordering from our organization! Your requested item has been shipped. The following software features are listed below. Incorporeal, infectious terminal Cross-dimensional Custom brainwave pattern creation For any questions on the programs specifications, please do not hesitate to contact us. Note: It appears that your group intends to interact with certain faculties within psionic or dreams based universes or realms. We humbly request that you do not affect our other products or headquarters specifically within Oneiori Space. -Anderson Footnotes 1. Oneiroi Space is the colloquial name for the set of hiveminds that are connected through organic hosts in physical space. 2. Mental energy refers to the ability or willingness to engage in cognitive work. 3. Dream groups are clusters of hosts that are physically nearby and/or interact with each other frequently. 4. Oneiori West is the largest and most stable cluster of hiveminds. It is notable for its complex security system and autonomy, in contrast with other collectives. 5. "The Foundation Fucking Sucks"

SCP-3063 is a telepathic, class-5 reality bending entity.

*** Item #: SCP-3063 Do you hear the buzzing? Object Class: Keter Ever so quiet. Special Containment Procedures: Newly discovered SCP-3063 manifestations are to be reported immediately, and destroyed as soon as possible by whatever means are appropriate. All Foundation buildings, and the residences of all Foundation personnel are to be equipped with the most effective insect control measures available. At no point should personnel ever interact with or acknowledge SCP-3063 manifestations outside of immediately destroying said manifestation. Ever so constant. Any Foundation personnel or civilian individuals known or suspected to have made an agreement with SCP-3063 are to be immediately contained in the nearest Foundation facility equipped with appropriate containment facilities1 until the event of said individual’s death. Once the affected individual has died, their remains are to be incinerated along with any organisms that may have emerged from them during their containment. Individuals affected by SCP-3063 do not require food or other external attention, and under no circumstances are they to be removed from containment while alive. The merest beating of wings in a far off room. If affected individuals are unable to be contained for any reason, every effort should be made by Foundation operatives to kill said individuals before the event of their natural death. If this is impossible, or if affected individuals are not discovered until their deaths, Mobile Task Force Beta-5 is to enact Procedure 18-Islip. Do you hear me? Description: SCP-3063 is a telepathic, class-5 reality bending entity. SCP-3063 invariably manifests as a physiologically non-anomalous adult male housefly (Musca domestica). It is currently believed that only one manifestation of SCP-3063 exists at any given time, but this is yet to be confirmed. Manifestations are to be considered “destroyed” when they have sustained damage that would be sufficient to kill a non-anomalous housefly, after which SCP-3063 will manifest elsewhere on Earth. No manifestation event has been observed as of yet, and it is not currently known whether SCP-3063 manifests as an entirely new individual housefly, or simply inhabits the body of an existing housefly. Do you hear me coming? All SCP-3063 manifestations operate with a single goal; namely making an agreement with an individual. The terms of such agreement vary greatly, but almost always involve SCP-3063 promising an individual any single thing they greatly desire in exchange for an unspecified price. Such offers have included large sums of money, the love of other individuals, political power, and reality bending ability. It is hypothesized that SCP-3063 reads the thoughts of its target to tailor an offer specific to them. SCP-3063 refuses to discuss anything other than the terms of its agreement. I am. If an individual accepts the terms of agreement, the SCP-3063 manifestation will immediately combust and die, at which point the individual will receive what they were promised. If an individual does not accept, SCP-3063 will continue to attempt to tempt them with larger and larger offers until either the individual accepts or the manifestation is destroyed. If an SCP-3063 manifestation is destroyed, successive manifestations will continue to contact the individual until they consent to the agreement. Do you know what it is? After a period of 2,376 days from the moment an agreement with SCP-3063 is made, affected individuals will undergo a process as detailed below: What you’d give anything for? Fertilized eggs representing virtually all known species of the order Diptera will spontaneously appear within the lungs, throat, stomach, intestines, sinuses, ear canals, rectum, urethra, and muscle tissues of the affected individual. The number of such eggs typically ranges from 5,000 to 20,000. The eggs will hatch naturally, and the resulting maggots will begin consuming tissues of the affected individuals for between 3 and 14 days in order to escape the body. When this period has elapsed, the maggots will pupate, and lie dormant. Within 2 to 6 days, pupae will emerge as adult imago2 flies. Newly emerged flies will continue consuming their host and breeding with each other until the host has sustained sufficient damage and dies. This typically takes between one and five weeks, and has been known to produce upwards of 50 million individual flies. When the affected individual has died, the remaining flies will cease reproducing, and enter a stage of dormancy, during which they will eventually starve and die. A new manifestation of SCP-3063 will appear shortly after the death of the affected individual. I know. Affected individuals will remain conscious for almost the entirety of this process, resulting in great distress. Roughly 70% of affected individuals will attempt suicide during this process. Flies generated during this process have been determined to be entirely non-anomalous. If the affected individual dies during any point in this process (or during the preceding 2,376 days), the process will stop and the flies will die. No known method of averting this process other than the death of the individual has been discovered. I can give it to you. To date, six Foundation personnel have been contacted by SCP-3063, and attempts have been made to alter the terms of agreement to entrap SCP-3063 into neutralizing itself, though none have met with success. Below is a partial test log of such attempts. It may not seem like much time. Test Log SCP-3063 But God, Test #: 3063-1 Tester: Senior Researcher Elizabeth Gāo Parameters: “The death of SCP-3063”. Result: SCP-3063 manifestation combusts. Eggs manifest within Dr. Gāo 2,376 days after testing. Interpretation: SCP-3063 apparently interprets its “death” as the death of a manifestation. It is an eternity Test #: 3063-2 Tester: Senior Researcher David Roberts Parameters: “The permanent containment of SCP-3063”. Result: SCP-3063 manifestation ceases moving, and is determined to have died. The dead instance is contained within a secure containment unit below Site-63. After 2,376 days, Diptera eggs manifest inside Senior Researcher Roberts’ body. 3 months after his death, another SCP-3063 instance is confirmed. Interpretation: Again, such terms of agreement seem to extend only to SCP-3063’s current manifestation. To a fly. Test #: 3063-3 Tester: Dr. Caroline Fairweather Parameters: “A permanent cessation of all activities of SCP-3063”. Result: Results identical to those of Test #3063-1. Interpretation: It is becoming clear that “permanent” in the context of SCP-3063 only extends for the 2,376 days prior to the death of the individual. Is it worth it? Test #: 3063-4 Tester: Senior Researcher William Marlowe Parameters: “Knowledge of the true nature of SCP-3063” Result: SCP-3063 combusts. A printed copy of this document (without test log) appears before Senior Researcher Marlowe. Process proceeds as normal. Interpretation: Assuming SCP-3063 does not cheat those it makes an agreement with, this document is to be considered accurate and true. You can’t decide. Test #: 3063-5 Tester: Dr. Patrick McGann Parameters: “Clear, understandable knowledge of SCP-3063 other than knowledge currently possessed by The SCP Foundation" Result: SCP-3063 combusts. Results of this test and the following test appear printed before Dr. McGann, who proceeds to kill himself by puncturing his carotid artery with a pen. Interpretation: SCP-3063 either possesses precognizant abilities, or is able to directly affect future events. But some part of you Test #: 3063-6 Tester: Dr. Jonathan Mabry Parameters: "Is there even a choice?" Result: Dr. Mabry experiences a severe pulmonary embolism and later dies en route to the medical center. SCP-3063 combusts. Interpretation: See test #3063-5 Some deep gnawing part of you Any personnel contacted by SCP-3063 are expected to report the event, and then use the opportunity to continue neutralization efforts. Thinks it might be. SCP-3063 is believed to have been in operation for at least 4,000 years, as the earliest known records of entities and events matching SCP-3063’s description have been discovered in early Canaanite settlements. Assuming an approximately constant rate of activity, this equates to approximately 615 agreements made. It is entirely possible that SCP-3063 has been in operation for considerably longer, and Foundation archaeological teams are currently searching for earlier recordings of events that would indicate as such. Do you hear it? Procedure Islip-18: In the event of the death of uncontained individuals due to SCP-3063’s effects, Mobile Task Beta-5 is to mobilize, and administer said individual with 90 grams of cypermethrin.3 Additional cypermethrin is to be sprayed within a 10 meter radius of the affected individual. After the individual and any generated flies have died, remains are to be incinerated. Any civilian witnesses are to be given a regimen of Class-A amnestics, and the area is to be closed to civilians for no less than 30 days under the pretense of a non-specific toxic spill. Do you hear the buzzing? Footnotes 1. Note: in this context, “appropriate” is not synonymous with “appropriate for humanoid containment”. Secure containment of affected individuals takes ultimate precedent. All other concerns, be they for comfort or otherwise, are secondary. 2. The final stage in the life cycle of metamorphosing insects. 3. A highly potent synthetic pyrethroid insecticide.

SCP-364 is a point several hundred meters above the volcano Surt on Io, the innermost of Jupiter’s Galilean satellites.

*** Item #: SCP-364 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: Since SCP-364 cannot be reached by humans, containment measures consist primarily of finding and suppressing any information about SCP-364 before such information can be publicly disseminated. Foundation assets have been inserted into all major space agencies and most private space exploration companies, with standing orders to report back on any actions planned or being carried out that could potentially expose SCP-364. A task force has also been set up to monitor actions by amateur astronomers, although the chances of independent discovery of SCP-364 from ground-based installations are quite small. Description: SCP-364 is a point several hundred meters above the volcano Surt on Io, the innermost of Jupiter’s Galilean satellites. At irregular intervals, varying amounts of material (up to 4000 cubic meters at a time) spontaneously appear at this location and settle into Surt, where the material is incinerated by the lava flow from the volcano. The mechanism by which this material appears is not known, and no permanent physical structure has as yet been detected near SCP-364, at any other location on Io, or anywhere else in the Jovian system. In addition, no unusual energy emissions have been detected coming from SCP-364 or the surrounding area. The material that appears is usually a heterogeneous mixture of substances, including metals (particularly ferrous and titanitic alloys), organic compounds, siliceous compounds, and several unknown materials (though spectrographic analysis suggests that these may include stable super-heavy elements). On at least four occasions, probes have detected marks on the material that appear to be a written language in an unknown script. In addition, a strong correlation has been discovered between the thermal output of Surt and the appearance of material at SCP-364. Although any potential causative relationship between the two phenomena is purely speculative, evidence collected to date overwhelmingly suggests that the material that appears at SCP-364 is artificial in origin. History: The existence of SCP-364 was first suggested in 1979, following the fly-by of Jupiter by the Voyager 1 probe. Unusual activity on Io had been picked up by [DATA EXPUNGED], part of a clandestine package of instruments added to both Voyager 1 and Voyager 2 by Foundation assets. However, the existence of SCP-364 could not be confirmed until the Galileo probe reached Jupiter in December 1995, using data and images collected by Galileo during its initial pass of Io. None of these images or data were released, the official story being that no images were taken in the first place. While Galileo was left to continue its original mission around Jupiter, Foundation personnel worked with high-ranking NASA officials to develop and launch two more probes to Io, specifically to study and monitor SCP-364. However, to avoid suspicion, these missions to Io were announced and treated as exploratory missions to Mars. In late 1999, both the Mars Climate Orbiter and the Mars Polar Lander appeared to crash land on Mars due to "human error", when in actuality both spacecraft continued on their way to Io, reaching Jupiter in 2007. Galileo had already been sent to its destruction in Jupiter’s atmosphere by this time, but the two "Mars" probes continue to send back data from Io and SCP-364. The replacements for these probes are already [DATA EXPUNGED]. Note: Because Io is constantly subjected to heavy radiation and Jupiter's formidable magnetosphere, any spacecraft sent into orbit around Io would be very short-lived, and the two probes up there now are in orbit around Europa and Jupiter. Thus, constant observation of SCP-364 is not possible, but this is not a major issue while SCP-364 remains immobile. A more pressing concern is technology: how long will it be before anyone in the world can point a next-generation telescope at Io and be able to resolve 10-meter-long objects from the Earth's surface? Plus, who's to say that whatever is sending that stuff to Io couldn't send it somewhere else? —Dr. Blanchard

SCP-3772 is a phenomenon whereby internet content meeting certain criteria will convert to a video or infographic relating to the death of Faith Bassen in 2020.

*** Item #: SCP-3772 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: As SCP-3772 is considered dormant, and can be easily disregarded as non-anomalous, containment focuses on suppression of discussion surrounding its method of distribution. Contacts in all major media-sharing platforms are working alongside the Foundation to assist with pre-emptive removal of media meeting SCP-3772's parameters, under the guide of content-protection rules. Description: SCP-3772 is a phenomenon whereby internet content meeting certain criteria will convert to a video or infographic relating to the death of Faith Bassen in 2020. This conversion only affects end-user machines, and does not alter the media for others who have not triggered the phenomenon. The primary parameter ascertained is that the content is not owned or created by the poster, and a caption of or within the content alludes to a desire to discover the content's creator, whether or not said desire can be judged to be genuine1. Chances of SCP-3772 occurring are greater when a user is on US geopolitical territory, and particularly as a user approaches the census-designated place of Comfort, Texas. Most commonly, SCP-3772 manifests as a static image of Faith Bassen with captioning providing details of her disappearance and the discovery of her body, with a strong focus on the lack of an official investigation by the local police force. When manifesting in video form, this information will commonly give way to phone camera recordings of Faith, with the names and faces of others appearing in the footage digitally censored. This footage is interspersed with graphic and provocative descriptions of her injuries, threats towards the perpetrators and the repeated line "FAITH BASSEN WAS MURDERED", which doubled as a hashtag for the movement to press the local police force to investigate the death. The first known instance of SCP-3772 came to the Foundation's attention on 8/12/2020, two months after the death of Ms Bassen. After confirmation of anomalous nature, initial containment focused on suppression of discussion and investigation of SCP-3772's trigger parameters. The Unusual Incidents Unit took over management of the investigation following Foundation prompting, and suspects were successfully brought to trial between May and July 2021. Following this, the incident rate of SCP-3772 manifestations dropped almost completely. Addendum 1 Analysis of existing archived chatlogs for GoI-5869 ("Gamers Against Weed") show a number of conversations related to this issue, primarily involving the users warysue and tiedyeduck in a sidechat labelled wip. As chatlogs are only available from the laptop of a member of the GoI who had little interaction with warysue, the majority of these conversations are contextless or incomplete. + Snippet 1: 11/17/2020 – hide block -> you joined gaycopmp4: that all sounds doable yeah but we'll need to work on the specific vids you wanna include bluntfiend: You're really going for this, huh? -> Quavo joined warysue: we are . It's Important Quavo: glah gaycopmp4: strip out identifiers etc we don't want people complaining you're spreading their image gaycopmp4: we'll leave 4chamber's in obv warysue: just call her Faith . not warysue: not like her privacy matters now <- Quavo left tiedyeduck: Can I just go on the record as very fucking against this warysue: Fuck You bluntfiend: I'm inclined toward tiedye- Whoah ok. warysue: she's dead and I'm the Only One trying to do something about it tiedyeduck: I was going to elucidate my point but if you're going to be like this it'd be futile warysue: and gcm . bluntfiend: Ok, listen up. bones: I'm going to preemptively ask that you move this conversation to PMs. Warysue, while I understand your pain, it would serve you well to give benefit of the doubt in this context. bluntfiend: Never mind, bones is on it. warysue: noted, and Fuck that warysue: gaycopmp4: lemme know on the discord if you've warysue: got more questions . I'll work on fuzzing out faces And Shit <- warysue left tiedyeduck: Look, I'm not saying the idea is fundamentally bad, but the execution you're discussing is just crass. gaycopmp4: she's gone tiedyeduck: yeah tiedyeduck: :/ bones: She is grieving a close friend. Her behavior may be more extreme for a time, but remember that she is working through a trauma. I believe you know what that feels like. tiedyeduck: We all do, bones. tiedyeduck: This is gonna be a clusterfuck, isn't it? + Snippet 2: 11/22/2020 – hide block -> warysue joined lesbian_gengar: I /could/ do that but what would be the point warysue: hey All harmpit: comn gnengar you knwo itsll be funny as hsit kkrule: hey sue i think duck was looking for you earlier kkrule: tiedyeduck: ping ping warysue: I Don't want to talk to harmpit: mr fucking olbiquly refranced will risse from the asehs warysue: to him tiedyeduck: I just wanna say I'm sorry. lesbian_gengar: talk to gaycop about this she's better with computer stuff tiedyeduck: I came in too strong the other day - I want to help, I just think you're going about it the wrong way. warysue: that's a shitty apology tiedyeduck: Come on. kkrule: uh sorry i didnt know you were fighting warysue: no you Come On . I'm going about it Exactly the way Faith would have wanted it. harmpit: ccol cool ill tdo that but fi she says no ii can comc bank to you righu kkrule: i thought he wanted to do over watch or something tiedyeduck: Exactly what she would have wanted? I've seen your demo posters. The places you're intending these to end up, she'll end up in the hands of people who'll make her a target for ridicule. warysue: 1 . I know there's Awful People out there that's why Faith is fucking dead and 2 . I thin warysue: 2. I think there's more people out there who'll listen and tweet kkrule: god im really sorry waysue warysue: it's ok kkrule just Ssh tiedyeduck: Is that worth it, though? Her face getting used for awful jokes, becoming synonymous with all the other dead trans girls they fucking meme about. She's not gonna come back. warysue: I can't believe you'd fuck warysue: fucking say that , of course its Worth It to catch whoever did it harmpit: i ccant beleieve youd fcuck haaaaaa bones: Inappropriate in the context, harmpit. tiedyeduck: You really think it'll achieve that? Even if the cops do start an investigation, it's been weeks and she was found on a riverbank, there's no evidence to examine. Maybe if they'd done a proper autopsy they'd have something to work on, but they couldn't. kkrule: yeah not cool harmpit come on -> you left (Timeout) + Snippet 3: 12/9/2020  – hide block orbhorse: pee is stored in the galls -> warysue joined heartshapeddoxx: ob dude you're the worst bones: Warysue, you should know that The Daily Dot published a short article about #FaithBassenWasMurdered 23 minutes ago. warysue: I was just about to link it, yeah ! bluntfiend: Shit my guys, I think I just swallowed a whole chicken wing. warysue: it's starting to Happen heartshapeddoxx: is this like a new goof or something heartshapeddoxx: I'm so out of the loop kkrule: hi HSD are you new warysue: it's very much Not A Goof . bones: Heartshapeddoxx is an older member of the chat, from before my time here. From what I understand, he played a large part in its creation. This is his second time back since you joined, kkrule. warysue: this is a movement I started to get justice for a Dead Friend of mine heartshapeddoxx: haa yea and I don't even remember the last time heartshapeddoxx: oh shit I'm sorry warysue: it's ok . you didn't know unlike s warysue: unlike Some People lesbian_gengar: so are you trending or tiedyeduck: I thought we sorted this, wary. kkrule: oh shit i remember that i hope it does well bluntfiend: .botsnack some good fuckin oatmeal warysue: lesbian_gengar: not yet but it's really built since the article hit so fingers crossed orbhorse: dude how baked are you we haven't had a bot in like years bluntfiend: Whhh? warysue: tiedyeduck: sorry dude yeah I'm just Still Angry and I'm putting that on you heartshapeddoxx: did you fuckin see i was online and time-teleport back to like 2008 kkrule: just tweeted about it warysue! bluntfiend: Where's oinky friend ;_; warysue: I'm going to go up to the station and let them know What's Coming . heartshapeddoxx: ren and me are working on it, blunt. Janitors have her rn so github updates are a no-go warysue: these pigs are gonna Regret not listening to me <- warysue left bluntfiend: Pigs? :D + Snippet 4: 11/11/2021 – hide block polaricecraps: this is fucking horseshit ok you go on about not wanting to draw attention but we draw attention like nobody's business bluntfiend alone is probably like triple on the janitor's radar already harmpit: perison bwloe triple rdaar polaricecraps: and we've already DONE shit like this we got those guys caught when 4chambers was killed and she was like barely a member lesbian_gengar: hey whoah let's not throw shade at the dead bluntfiend: Lest the dead dab back. polaricecraps: like if it'd been an exception cos it was Dove I'd have understood man but you're telling me we can hijack the fuckin hashtag tearjerk market for someone who said like four lines max in main but we can't leverage that same shit to defend ourselves from the nazi fucks trying to kick our damn door down bones: Op order, drop this now. Lesbian_gengar has it right, speaking ill of the dead is in very bad taste. 4chambers may not have participated to your knowledge, but I can inform you she was very much a member of our community. warysue: whatever , not like it matters not warysue: nothing Changed . polaricecraps: dropped but I wanna talk about this again when I've cooled off bones: That is acceptable. kkrule: i know you don't feel that way wary but the men who did it got caught and they're in jail now so it did make a difference lesbian_gengar: don't, kk warysue: only two of them . Other guy walked away Scott Free . And they only got twenty years, w chance for parole in fucking "024 warysue: *2024 bluntfiend: You can rest easy knowing you did all you could, wary. It's tough, but you went above and beyond and got a result, even if it's not the one you hoped for. lesbian_gengar: christ just let it rest it's ok for stuff to be shit sometimes warysue: no it's ok , they're trying to help im warysue: I'm sorry I'm being A Bummer polaricecraps: sorry for being a dick about it warysue: shut up craps you were Unbelievably Insensitive polaricecraps: yeh fair bones: We cannot miss her as much as you do, warysue, but we miss her all the same. The list of our fallen friends is not tiered. bluntfiend: That's a list that's way too long. lesbian_gengar: mm polaricecraps: and it'll be longer if we don't start utilising our shit to stop the wolves at our door bones: Final warning, polaricecraps. <- polaricecraps left warysue: I'm actually uh , warysue: I think I'll go down to her grave , now I'm thinking about it bluntfiend: Good plan. Say hi from us, yeah? warysue: yeah , will do d warysue: Does anyone have anything in particular they want me to pass on ? I can write it down on some paper n leave it there tiedyeduck: I've actually got something. Is that ok? warysue: course it is tiedyeduck: Ok, awesome. Tell her this: <- you disconnected Footnotes 1. This factor is hugely increased when artist signatures and watermarks have been removed from the content

SCP-5160 is a small female Ouessant sheep (Ovis aries), which wears1 a pointed "witch hat" adorned with a purple ribbon and bow.

*** Item #: SCP-5160 Object Class: Keter Special Containment Procedures: When physically in Foundation custody, SCP-5160 is to be housed in a medium-sized, camera-monitored livestock enclosure at Site-17. Standard food and custodial amenities are to be provided. Light grooming is to take place once monthly. SCP-5160 has been fitted with a custom-designed decorative tracking collar, to allow for the Foundation to identify locations at which it manifests. Should SCP-5160 be confirmed to have manifested near a public school, Foundation agents are to enter the premises under the guise of retrieving a fundraising charity mascot, and escort the entity away from the campus. Children are permitted to interact with SCP-5160 during the escorting process so long as low-dose amnestics are administered afterward. Should SCP-5160 disappear and re-manifest in its typical enclosure, no action is to be taken. Any overtly anomalous instances of SCP-5160-1 produced by SCP-5160 are to be confiscated and kept in Foundation custody at the nearest Foundation Site, with a non-anomalous replacement provided to the original recipient. Currently, there are 27 such items in storage; these instances may be used for experimentation by any researcher with Level-3 or higher clearance. Instances of SCP-5160-1 that do not exhibit any noticeable anomalies may be retained by the individual whom originally received the instance from SCP-5160. Followup investigations may proceed as necessary. A Foundation cover company named "Grandmother Sheep" (with the image of SCP-5160 used as its mascot) has been established as a disinformation initiative to deter civilian investigation of SCP-5160. The company is to function as a nonprofit charity dedicated to providing clothing, specifically handmade woolen items, to schoolchildren of low-income households. A full-time team of five Foundation agents is to maintain the Grandmother Sheep cover company's documentation and handle donations and distribution. The team is also to facilitate regular public appearances of non-anomalous SCP-5160 lookalikes for mascot "meet-and-greet" events. D-Class personnel with positive behavioral records may be recruited to assist with these tasks; paid leave will be granted to skilled Foundation researchers willing to host group knitting sessions for these individuals. Description: SCP-5160 is a small female Ouessant sheep (Ovis aries), which wears1 a pointed "witch hat" adorned with a purple ribbon and bow. SCP-5160 has the appearance of a non-anomalous geriatric sheep, but has not shown evidence of further aging. When approached by a human, SCP-5160 will anomalously release aromas considered by the individual to be comforting and pleasant. Should SCP-5160 be observed continuously, observers will note that it gradually takes on visible qualities reminiscent of their grandmothers, including hairstyles, accessories (glasses, jewelry, hair curlers, etc.) and clothing (aprons, knitwear). These visual anomalies are unique to the observer. Approximately once a week, SCP-5160 has been observed to vanish in a cloud of colored smoke and re-manifest in a housing area2 occupied by low-income families. SCP-5160 will then seek out a public gathering space and wait to be approached. Children (individuals under 18 years of age) who speak to SCP-5160 will be offered an article of woolen clothing, produced from SCP-5160's hat.3 These items (designated SCP-5160-1) have been found to possess minor anomalous properties, thus far demonstrated to manifest solely for the recipient. A partial list of SCP-5160-1 instances allowed to remain with their recipients is as follows: Article of Clothing Anomalous Property Recipient/Brief Background Black Mittens Provides a subtle "heating" effect, presumably to keep hands warm. Stated that "it feels like someone is holding my hand." ██████, Samuel. Was often placed in free afterschool programs due to parents working fulltime. Frequently did not return home until very late. Light Grey Beanie (Self-reported) "Thinking cap whispered and helped [me] remember more things." ███, Gabe. Was previously teased for losing items and quickly forgetting names of classmates. Salmon Pink Sweater Raised confidence, slightly improved overall body strength. Subject stated that they "feel like someone is cheering for me." ██████, Layna. Frequently sat out of sports and outside activities, cited fear of being hurt or "being the worst on the team". Black Scarf (Self-reported) "When I wear the scarf, I have an easier time thinking of funny things and I can make people laugh easily-er." █████████, Esmerelda. Noted to be timid and had difficulty making friends during lower-grade elementary years. White Socks (Self-reported) "I feel more comfortable when I wear the socks while studying. When I focus on the feel of the wool on my feet, I get distracted less often." ███, Hiroshi. First-generation college student, graduated high school early on a full scholarship. White Mittens (Self-reported) "When I look at the mittens, I see patterns in the wool that remind me of happy things, like clouds and ice cream and my favorite blanket from when I was little." ██████, Garyl. Child history seems unremarkable; mother was noted to have suffered severe postpartum depression. Addendum SCP-5160-1: SCP-5160 first attracted Foundation attention when many elementary schools within the same region of France reported a singular "lost sheep with a fancy hat" roaming campuses and evading capture. After months of surveillance, Foundation agents were eventually able to intercept SCP-5160 at ████████ Primary School, in North Yorkshire, England. Containment specialists dispatched to the location reported that upon their arrival, SCP-5160 appeared to half of the team4 as 5-meter tall versions of their maternal grandmothers. Additional assistance was called in and SCP-5160 was transported to the nearest Foundation site with no incident. Initial housing of SCP-5160 proved difficult, as it would repeatedly demanifest for long periods of time, only to reappear in various other rooms in the facility. Research personnel were able to lure SCP-5160 back to its usual enclosure using fresh fruits and other treats. However, after SCP-5160 had manifested in the site's break room, it was discovered that it had a fondness for reading knitting magazines. Upon being provided with several monthly subscriptions (and a basket to keep old issues in), SCP-5160 was persuaded to remain in its enclosure for extended periods of time. Over the course of the next few months, Foundation personnel attempted to communicate with SCP-5160, who consistently would only respond5 to binary ("yes/no") questions, and would only acknowledge three questions per day, if addressed as "grandma" or variations on the title. A tentative agreement was established: in exchange for SCP-5160's compliance, the Foundation would found a charity in its image, devoting a certain annual portion of the site's budget to said charity. SCP-5160 was to be given the final say in any publicity decisions, including the design of the charity logo. Addendum SCP-5160-2: Roughly three months after the founding of the Grandmother Sheep charity, undercover Foundation agents began receiving letters and artwork from children who received items through the organization. Dr. ████ █████ (the lead containment specialist on the SCP-5160 project) suggested that rather than storing the documents in the archives, they instead be kept in the interior portion of SCP-5160's enclosure. A large bulletin board was added to the containment area to allow SCP-5160 to display its favorite6 letters and drawings. Shortly after this change was made, SCP-5160 presented Dr. ████ █████ with a pair of woolen socks, presumably for Dr. █████'s toddler daughter. Thus far, the only observed anomalous effects involve the socks playing gentle, low-volume piano music when worn during evening and nighttime.7 Close inspection of the objects revealed small text embroidered into the inner lining of each sock, reading "Grandma believes in you." As of currently, Dr. █████ has been given provisional custody of the item. Footnotes 1. No attempts have been made to remove the hat, though it has been observed that no matter how SCP-5160 moves or is moved, the hat stays firmly affixed to its head unless SCP-5160 removes the hat on its own. 2. SCP-5160 seems to manifest primarily in developed countries, particularly those where sheep are relatively commonplace. 3. SCP-5160 will lean down to remove the hat, and pull the item of clothing out from the hat with its teeth. 4. It was later noted that the affected personnel had participated in industry work involving animal testing. 5. SCP-5160 will express affirmatives with loud bleating, and negatives with softer bleating. 6. Thus far, SCP-5160 consistently exhibits a fondness for works that reference its purple witch's hat. 7. Dr. ████ █████ expressed gratitude to SCP-5160 for the gift, as he previously was concerned about his daughter having difficulty sleeping through the night.

SCP-874 is a black, largely unreflective fluid with 30.

*** Item #: SCP-874 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: While not undergoing experimentation, SCP-874 is to be kept in a container such that no horizontal volume of the substance is shallower than 5 cm. The fluid must be in constant motion, such as being stirred. With the Foundation's current supply of SCP-874, this is to be a cylindrical steel vat of radius seven meters and height 10 meters. While SCP-874 is under study, no non-Class D personnel are to be within five meters of the liquid. Any lab in which SCP-874 is studied should be equipped with a winch system of no less than ████ horsepower and with steel rope of 5 (five) cm thickness. All personnel who have been immersed in SCP-874 in its active state should be terminated after study. Description: SCP-874 is a black, largely unreflective fluid with 30.87 cP viscosity and reflectivity less than a tenth of that of water. When it approaches a static depth of 2 cm, the fluid functions as a portal to a seemingly infinite space. Telemetry into the abyss has led to no conclusive results as to its dimensions. Audio readings and personnel report the sound of distant grinding of metal and stone from this portal. Occasionally, viewers and visual recording equipment can glimpse what appears to be immense rotating ███████ drifting aimlessly in the otherwise featureless blackness. Assuming, as evidenced, zero gravity, an object propelled through the portal can travel approximately 3000 km before being totally obscured by the very light fog that fills the abyss. Objects partially lowered into the surface cannot be retrieved by any effort less than the recommended ████ horsepower. Later experiments (those after March ██, 20██) revealed that objects left in for more than five minutes are quickly worn away by invisible ████████. Class D personnel who touched the portal reported that it felt like putting their hand in a cool bowl of water. They were unable to remove their limbs from the surface, reflecting the difficulty of extracting inanimate objects from the portal. The personnel claimed that it felt as though an array of wires were holding them in (video recordings of the puddle showed no change in the skin formation of these participants). After five minutes expired, the limbs were severed, which later examination showed to be due to a large number of irregular, shallow cuts. The first batch of personnel totally submersed in SCP-874 was [DATA EXPUNGED]. The next sequence of experiments was conducted after the winch system was tested with non-living objects, which were safely retrieved if pulled up before five minutes of submersion. When the next group of personnel was retrieved with harnesses, they reported [DATA EXPUNGED] (see Document 874-9). Upon extraction, the group expressed elation and awe. Shortly afterward, they began to self-mutilate and exhibit violent and suicidal tendencies. Interview Log #874-1 Document #874-2: Interview with D-17549 Dr ████████: Before you were extracted, what did you see behind the portal? D-17549: Those eyes. Like they didn't care a bit. How beautiful. Dr ████████: What eyes? Please explain what you saw thoroughly. D-17549: And their ██████ were like little knives! And how they played against each other. Dr ████████: D-17549, you are being uncooperative. If you do not answer the questions I'm asking you, you may have to suffer an early termination. D-17549: Ah, yes. That would be nice. Please, ask away. Dr ████████: What did you see whe - wait, did you say "nice"? D-17549: We saw quite a large number of [DATA EXPUNGED]. Now, I helped you; will you help me? Dr ████████: You aren't in any position to be making requests. D-17549: I would very much like to see things the way the ████████ down there do. Just tell those men with the guns to put a bullet in me. D-17549 starts bashing his head against the desk. Dr ████████ backs away from the table. D-17549 tackles him and is shot by security.

SCP-2572 is a subway car formerly belonging to a train operating within the New York City Subway system.

*** Item #: SCP-2572 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-2572 is currently contained in a Storage Chamber within Site-132. Testing of SCP-2572 must be approved by the Project Lead. Subjects approved for testing are to undergo psychological testing prior to and after the test. Subjects who experience prolonged psychological effects are to be administered Class-B amnestics. Description: SCP-2572 is a subway car formerly belonging to a train operating within the New York City Subway system. SCP-2572 was in operation from 1972 until 198█, shortly after reports of its anomalous properties were documented. SCP-2572 was promptly removed from its train and sent to Site-132 for containment. SCP-2572's effects manifest whenever a subject is inside of it and the car is traveling between the 34 Street Herald Square Station and Dekalb Avenue Station.1 Effects may vary, but generally follows a pattern as SCP-2572 travels between stations. Notably, the effects will only manifest when the car begins traveling out of the 34 Street Herald Square Station. Effects are stated as follows: 34 Street Herald Square: Subject experiences a rush, marked by intense euphoria, increased heartbeat, increased respiration, dilated pupils and increased alertness. During this time, the subject may also experience slight paranoia. 28 Street through 23 Street: Subject's perception of time from this point forward is increased. In addition, the subject's attention is fixated on minute detail. Existing paranoia may increase. 14 Street Union Square: Subject begins to feel moderate paranoia, if not slight if the subject has not experienced it up until this point. Subject may also begin to experience hallucinations, manifesting as dark humanoid figures within the subject's peripheral vision. 8 Street NYU: Subjects report discomfort within their lungs. Any subjects who have not experienced hallucinations at this point begin to do so, manifesting as the above mentioned. Prince Street: The aforementioned humanoids begin to move outside of the subject's peripherals. The humanoids lack a face or any defining features, including hands and feet, and vary in number between subjects.2 Subjects report the instances 'sliding' along the length of the subway car and outside of the car. In addition, the subject feels additional discomfort in the lungs and tightness of the chest. Canal Street: Upon the arrival of the Canal Street Station, the subject experiences an intense ringing sound. A delusion manifests with all subjects; all feel their saliva and mucus hardening. The dark humanoids continue to move within the car at an increased rate. City Hall: Subjects may begin coughing. Those that do report the delusion continuing as fine white powder or small, clear crystals expelled from various orifices. Additionally, subjects report the hallucinatory instances staring at the subject. Rector St: The humanoids begin to advance on the subject. Coughing increases, if not beginning if the subject has not experienced it up to this point. Acute paranoia manifests. The humanoids begin to manifest hands and feet. Whitehall St-South Ferry: The subject's lungs begin to feel extremely irritated. Sensory overload may manifest in some subjects. The instances are now within close proximity of the subject and are reported to extend their hands towards the subject. Subject begins to feel discomfort along the body. Court St: Between Whitehall St and Court St, the subject feels additional discomfort and shaking of the body as the instances begin to caress the subject's arms and legs. Some subjects may also feel increased euphoria. Subjects that have coughed on the instances report said instances displaying hostility. Said instances grab the subject, pin them to the ground, and continue to caress the subject. Jay-St Metro Tech: Subject is continuously caressed upon the arrival of the Jay-St Station. After SCP-2572 leaves the station, the subject begins to feel crawling of the skin. The instances continue to caress and invariably begin to reach towards the subject's genitals shortly before arrival of the Dekalb Avenue Station. Dekalb Avenue Station: Immediately upon arrival, the subject reports cessation all effects. SCP-2572 was discovered shortly after an incident involving an individual expiring within the car, due to a heart attack. A cover story was fabricated, news reports and broadcasts were suppressed, and affected personnel were administered Class-B amnestics in combination with shock therapy. A toxicology report states the individual was under the influence of isopropylbenzylamine, methamphetamine, as well as a previously unknown substance prior to death. The individual was never identified. Footnotes 1. SCP-2572's effects can be activated by simulating its travel between these stations. This is accomplished by playing audio that is typical to subway car travel in New York City (train moving along track, intercom announcements, etc.) 2. The description of these humanoids match descriptions of an existing entity observed by The Foundation. For more information, refer to the documentation of SCP-2227

SCP-2495 is a novel interpretation of the James Joyce novel Ulysses, first published in the Journal of Modern Literature by a University of Dublin student named Myrna Callaghan (now SCP-2495-A.

*** Item #: SCP-2495 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: MTF Rho-93 ("Say It Ain't Sokal") are currently responsible for having copies of SCP-2495 circulated in academic publications removed, and the persons responsible for their publication detained and amnesticised. An archival copy of SCP-2495 has been stored on the internal Hazardous Documents Database, with Level 2 personnel and above being able to view selected excerpts of the full text. SCP-2495-A is to be contained in a standard Type-B Humanoid Containment Chamber in Site-43. Researchers in face-to-face contact with SCP-2495-A must change into a supplied full-body garment to prevent it from using its precognitive abilities in a potentially compromising manner. In addition to this, researchers should not be exposed to predictions of events that mention or otherwise relate to them, so as to avoid undue emotional impact as a result of predicted events. SCP-2495-A is currently undergoing treatment for anxiety and insomnia caused by its anomalous abilities, and as such is required to attend weekly appointments with its assigned psychiatrist (currently Dr. Adileh Khayyam, Humanoid Anomaly Specialist). Description: SCP-2495 is a novel interpretation of the James Joyce novel Ulysses, first published in the Journal of Modern Literature by a University of Dublin student named Myrna Callaghan (now SCP-2495-A.) The interpretation analyses the novel from a linguistic point of view using natural language processing1 techniques and other advanced computing concepts to further a thesis about the novel as commentary on the relationship between the modern Irishman and the Irish language. SCP-2495 causes all those who read and comprehend its full text to gain heightened pattern recognition abilities over the course of several months. Initially, this simply manifests as an increased ability to recognise patterns in simple data such as numeric sequences — over time, the extent of this increases drastically so that affected subjects are capable of identifying seed values for pseudo-random number generators and performing other, highly difficult pattern recognition-based tasks. As SCP-2495 infection progresses, subjects report an increase in migraines, elevated blood pressure and insomnia, presumably as a result of the compulsive pareidolia that affects them. Amnestic treatments have proven generally effective at curing SCP-2495 infection at any stage, with SCP-2495-A being the sole observed exception to this. SCP-2495-A is a 27-year-old human female of Irish descent weighing approximately 83kg and standing 155cm tall. It claims its infection predates the completion of SCP-2495, possibly as a result of the events portrayed in materials recovered from its apartment (see Addendum SCP-2495-01). Due to its abnormally advanced condition, it experiences debilitating migraines when using its sight for even minutes at a time, and has been provided with protective sunglasses to prevent these from occuring. In addition to the abilities common to SCP-2495-infected subjects, SCP-2495-A exhibits mild precognitive abilities, which it claims is a direct result of its prolonged exposure to SCP-2495. When it has line of sight with objects of personal signficance to an individual, SCP-2495-A is capable of making accurate predictions about incidents that individual will be involved with up to three hours in the future. The specificity of these predictions appears to be proportional with the quantity of these objects it can see and their degree of significance to the individual in question. These abilities do not allow it to make predictions about events that will happen to it, or future events that will otherwise involve it. It is unknown if these additional abilities are the result of extremely advanced SCP-2495 infection, or some external factor unique to SCP-2495-A. Addendum SCP-2495-01: Discovery and Recovered Material SCP-2495-A initially came to the attention of the Foundation after its disappearance in 2015 and subsequent re-appearance in its apartment. At the time, it had been found amnesiac and suffering from symptoms reminiscent of those involved in Class-A amnestic overdose, including amnesia that prevented it from remembering significant amounts of the time period from 2010 to 2015. Despite this, it was still cognizant of its anomalous abilities and those of SCP-2495; after both these pieces of information were verified, SCP-2495-A was taken into containment and civilians exposed to SCP-2495 amnesticised. During the initial raid on SCP-2495-A's apartment, six documents were found on its laptop, believed to be previous iterations of SCP-2495. Each document had an accompanying plaintext file titled in the format "changelog<iteration number>.txt", most likely comments from SCP-2495-A related to the creation of the iteration. These documents are as followed: Iteration # Date of Change Summary of Version 1 2011-06-13 An outline of a thesis on a natural language processing project, presumably for the computer science degree SCP-2495-A was undertaking prior to it being placed in containment. The thesis details a way to use pattern-finding algorithms to improve parsing of language input by a human user, and provides a pseudocode algorithm presumably written for this purpose: said pseudocode is heavily obfuscated and nonsensical, with numerous abbreviations of unknown meaning composing much of its body. + Changelog #1 - Hide I've heard of serendipity before, but I don't think I've ever heard of it ever coming when you're dissociating hard enough to break your head out your skull. Figured out a really, really rough way of kludging together my final work for my thesis and some advanced math stuff that's been sloshing in my head during my talks with Nat: slapped down some pseudocode when the idea hit me, and that's just about all I've copied down so far. Probably gonna take a lot of hammering away to get this into a workable form, might ask Nat if the idea's sound. Got to play the math major hand you're dealt. Iteration # Date of Change Summary of Version 2 2012-01-13 While still generally the same as Iteration 1, several section titles have been corrupted and the section containing the pseudo-code mentioned above has been expanded significantly. The title page now claims the thesis was co-written by both SCP-2495-A and a PoI named Natalia Ianucci. Ianucci was a registered student of the University of Dublin for three years prior to her disappearance under unknown circumstances: Foundation-led investigation is ongoing. + Changelog #2 - Hide Going to have to make this a lot shorter than normal: feel like utter shit. Words on the page feel sticky to the touch now: my stomach turns just having to re-read this thing for spelling errors. Have I got an intellectual hangover? What the hell was in that book Nat showed me the other day? Whatever's behind my eyelids looks pink now. Can't get to sleep. Iteration # Date of Change Summary of Version 3 2012-01-15 A chapter of the thesis outlined in Iteration #1, titled "Practical Implementation of Solomonoff Induction-based Concept". Presumably intended to showcase a piece of code that would perform Solomonoff induction2, the section that would contain this code contains only heavily corrupted data and excerpts from other critics' analyses of Ulysses. + Changelog #3 - Hide Re-read Nat's book today as we listened to old jazz. The drums sounded like coins against steel drums as I read, and the pink light behind my eyes gets far more focussed now, which helped with the idea. Pattern-matching. That's the conceit of the thing, that it can find patterns at the heart of things no matter what kind of interference it's given. When all I have is a five-hundred and thirty two word mess of hand-written notes to capture this idea, whatever light it had no longer shines through it: but refine it, tease the pure algorithm inside from the clumsy words I wrote to set it down, and that light shines harder and brighter than ever before. And as for how I refine it: apply the light to itself, dirty and scuffed at first but brighter and more pure as time goes on. Start finding little pieces of that pattern with what I have to go on, use those same small fragments to uncover more, rinse, repeat, and it all falls into place. It needs to be unit-tested, though. If it can decrypt the simple madness of the Modernists, then its own internal workings should be no different. Iteration # Date of Change Summary of Version 4 2013-12-01 A PDF copy of James Joyce's Ulysses with identical text to the Project Gutenberg version. The only difference between the Project Gutenberg PDF and this iteration is a number of functionally meaningless edits to metadata attached to the file. + Changelog #4 - Hide Had to get round to this version eventually, had to get this one over with as fast as possible — cement the idea in my mind lest the fours get in through the cracks and dislodge it. Not going to write any more in this revision, not that I have the inspiration to do that, anyway. The light is darkest before the dawn. Iteration # Date of Change Summary of Version 5 2014-05-25 This version consists of a PDF of several hundred scanned pages of hand-written notes, as well as print-outs of statistics derived from computer analysis of Ulysses. Anatomical diagrams of hands, descriptions of the Sagrada Familia copied verbatim from a travel guide owned by SCP-2495-A, and sketches of a five-sided fractal figure feature prominently within the hand-written portion of the document. Only twelve pages of these notes actually mention Ulysses: all of them make reference to it as the "Fourth Imperfect Compilation". + Changelog #5 - Hide Took a trip to London with Nat, to immerse myself in the atmosphere and architecture. Helped more than I thought it would. The underground looked beautiful from outside, and falling asleep within it was even better. The rails catch the dreams like sieves and I could focus for once, just letting the sound of them relax me as I went to work on my notebook again. The numbers get easier to manage in your head if you can see them in that light and the patterns looked far clearer this time when I read over it again. I know this isn't a final draft, not by half. The lens I've placed over the light focusses it in all the wrong ways and a broken lens is useless no matter how much dirt you clean off its surface: still, even when all the wrong curves get highlighted the shape's still beautiful. Tried overlaying that new outline over one of Nat's scarves and a couple of her shirts, saw her burning her mouth on coffee with her phone reading 26th of May. I'll have to see whether the shape draws out what I think it does in the morning. I need to sleep some time. Can't see the outline I'm working for as clearly when I've been up 23 hours without a rest. Iteration # Date of Change Summary of Version 6 2014-09-10 SCP-2495's current state. + Changelog #6 - Hide There are good ideas. There are bad ideas. And then there are ideas on both ends of the spectrum so far away from normal we can't fucking conceive of them without the aid of psychedelics and they spread even better than anything else. This is an idea I caught while I was sleepless and depressed and now that I've pulled it back to Earth, bound it and strapped it down to the table with words and sentences and paragraphs it's gonna wreck havoc on my head and those of the people around me. It's been stretching and bending and breaking my mind to make space for it inside my skull and now there are fives singing above me and sevens below me and I have to keep digging downwards. There is truth — there is truth at the center of all this confusion of narrative that my words only serve to worsen, there is a pattern that contains all other patterns, there is a great pink light at the bottom of this ocean floor and I'm going to find it. My professor's going to read this and she's going to peek through the slits in the curtains and the light'll sing to her right this time. But even this is just a chain for others with nothing on its end: we'll see how heavy these words can get when they have some weight behind them. Six layers deep. One to go. The well awaits. No data on SCP-2495-A's computer has been found to originate from a point in time later than the 10th of September, 2014. The reason for this is unknown. Footnotes 1. A field of computer science that focusses on the interaction between computers and natural human languages, particularly focussing on the task of having computers process language input meaningfully. 2. A method of prediction based on logical observations (e.g. predicting the next symbol in a given series) that could theoretically predict the most likely hypothesis to explain any event, provided this event obeys some computable probability distribution.

SCP-1252 is a sapient, adult humanoid of indeterminate sex, approximately 43kg in mass and 1.

*** Item #: SCP-1252 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: SCP-1252 is to be contained in a standard humanoid containment chamber large enough to also contain its designated life support system. SCP-1252 is to be attended to by a team of medical personnel in a manner detailed in Treatment Schedule 1252-L. SCP-1252 is to receive nutrition through intravenous therapy as detailed in Treatment Schedule 1252-L until the subject's digestive system is deemed functional. SCP-1252 is to be led to believe that "Suzie" or "Susan May Fox" is currently alive and is undergoing treatment in a local hospital specializing in children. Personnel are encouraged to reinforce this belief with SCP-1252 whenever it brings up the subject. Personnel are further encouraged to emphasize the subject exercise patience in waiting for Suzie's return. Should it begin to show skepticism, personnel are to maintain the established fabrication and notify Dr. Liu immediately for further instruction. Description: SCP-1252 is a sapient, adult humanoid of indeterminate sex, approximately 43kg in mass and 1.78m in height. SCP-1252 appears to be missing at least half of its body mass, mostly in the form of muscle, fat, bone and skin tissue. The only limbs or organs entirely intact are the left arm, heart, and brain. Despite its injuries, the subject is capable of speech. Much of the remaining internal organs are composed of what appears to be compressed insect wing material, which maintains structural integrity only while part of SCP-1252. Once removed, it rapidly separates into non-anomalous wing scales. Approximately 23% of SCP-1252's skin appears to made up of wings from multiple species in the Papilionidae (swallowtail butterfly) and Libellulidae (skimmer/percher dragonfly) families. SCP-1252's left eye has been replaced with a Clerodendrum ugandense (Blue Glorybower or Blue Butterfly Bush) flower. The eye is not believed to be capable of sight and does not blink. Although capable of regeneration, SCP-1252 does not seem to be able to fully recover any missing skin or other bodily tissues; once it achieves a maximum body mass of 43 kg, all healing of internal organs and skin stops. SCP-1252's behavior remains highly cooperative, partially due to the fabrication detailed in its Special Containment Procedures. Despite its cooperation, the exact nature of SCP-1252 remains unknown. New information or theories are to be reported to Dr. Liu. Interview 1252-001 Interview 1252-001 Date: March 2█, 20██ Interviewee: SCP-1252 Interviewer: Dr. Blake Notes: This interview was conducted 2 days after the Foundation's acquisition of SCP-1252, as it was previously not healthy enough to communicate and was temporarily kept in an isolated room in the Medical wing at Site-37 for recovery. [BEGIN LOG] Dr. Blake: So you're SCP-1252, right? SCP-1252: [attempts a shrug, no verbal response] Dr. Blake: [sifting through clipboard] Could you explain what exactly you are supposed to be? SCP-1252: I'm supposed to be Suzie's very best friend. Well, Suzie is what her friends called her. Dr. Blake: Right. Could you please explain why you have insect wings on your skin? SCP-1252: Suzie always liked butterflies. Dragonflies too. They were pretty. And flowers. Her mother grew lots of flowers, back before her parents separated and her mother had to move into an apartment. [SCP-1252 briefly lifts its left hand up to touch its left eye.] Dr. Blake: [writing] Okay. Who is this Suzie? SCP-1252: [a slight pause as it adjusts its oxygen mask and inhales deeply several times] Her full name is Susan May Fox. [another pause and several deep inhalations] She lives on 16 Maple Road, in ████████. She goes to ██████ ██████████ Elementary School and is in second grade. Could you find her and tell her I'm okay? We got separated in an accident and I don't want her to worry. Dr. Blake: [writing] Please detail this accident you mentioned. SCP-1252: [several deep inhalations] I don't really know what happened. I'm sorry I couldn't be of more help. I just know I was supposed to be her very best friend. But something interrupted her thoughts. I'm sure when- [several inhalations] when you find her, she can explain everything. She's a smart girl. And when you do find her, could you please bring her to me, so I can be finished? I'm sure she would appreciate it. [Note: At this point SCP-1252 becomes very excited, prompting a medical personnel to signal to Dr. Blake and end the interview.] Dr. Blake: We will do what we can, SCP-1252. SCP-1252: [nods, no verbal response] [END LOG] Addendum-1252-A: SCP-1252 has requested the following: March 21, 20██: Pain medication (Denied on grounds of poor health) March 25, 20██: A variety of candies (Denied on grounds of poor health) April 1, 20██: Access to outside air (Denied on grounds of poor health) April 29, 20██: 1 copy of Beatrix Potter The Complete Tales by Beatrix Potter (Approved; SCP-1252 is to be allowed access for continued cooperative behavior) May 27, 20██: Stationery for purposes of self expression/entertainment (Approved; SCP-1252 is to be allowed access to wax crayon and paper for continued cooperative behavior) October 10, 20██: To receive a future letter being delivered to it. The letter arrived approximately 48 hours later at SCP-1252's door. The letter had no return address and the message contained details of Suzie's condition written in neat blue ink. It is unknown how SCP-1252 knew about the letter or how the letter appeared. (Denied on grounds of possible anomalous activity)

SCP-6350 is a VHS tape manufactured sometime between 1984 and 1989 by JakCo, Inc.

*** Item #: SCP-6350 Object Class: Safe Euclid Special Containment Procedures: [PENDING REVISION] SCP-6350 is contained in a Level 3 standard containment locker on the ground floor of Site-205. Access requires prior authorization from Site Command. All individuals exposed to SCP-6350 with clearance levels higher than Class-D must undergo psychological evaluation upon the completion of testing. Description: SCP-6350 is a VHS tape manufactured sometime between 1984 and 1989 by JakCo, Inc. The contents of SCP-6350 cannot be erased or otherwise taped over, though other standard VHS functions, such as rewinding or fast forwarding, remain possible. A blue and yellow JakCo label is present on the front face of the tape. There are no obvious physical abnormalities present. When inserted into a VHS player of any kind, SCP-6350 will begin playing a roughly one hour and ninety-three minute long film entitled My Room at Seaback, credited as having been directed by Roger Yule. Foundation research suggests Roger Yule does not exist. My Room at Seaback, henceforth designated SCP-6350-01, depicts a series of events at an establishment referred to as the Seaback Hotel; its precise location is never disclosed, though it is assumed to be located in the United States. The appearance of the film's sets, the actors' wardrobe, the general tone of the film, and other factors vary by each viewing, possibly due to the background of the viewer. Typically, the plot concerns a British spy and a female American accomplice using the Seaback Hotel as a staging area to apprehend a Russian operative. At exactly one hour and three minutes into the film, SCP-6350-01 will abruptly cut to an interior view of a room at the Seaback Hotel with the two lead actors present, seated on the room's bed and staring directly at the camera. Notably, this occurs regardless of the context of prior scenes; in one viewing, a sequence involving a car chase cut to the aforementioned scene. The actors remain in this position for an additional nine minutes, at which point the male actor will open his mouth. The female actor will then slowly enter the male actor's mouth head first, stretching as she moves in a process similar to the phenomenon of "spaghettification" experienced in gravitational singularities. The female actor remains conscious throughout this process and loudly screams, peaking the tape's audio. Realistic blood and gore is produced as the female actor's bones snap out of place and her muscles are ripped from their tendons. When the female actor has been fully consumed, the male actor will make an exaggerated "slurping" noise, speak in a voice dramatically lower than the voice used during the rest of the film, and smile at the camera before the tape cuts to black. Subjects exposed to SCP-6350-01 report being considerably disturbed afterward and often have trouble sleeping, with some cases resulting in diagnoses of general anxiety disorder or psychosis. Should an individual exposed to SCP-6350-01 view the film again, the "slurping" scene will not be present and the film will conclude normally, though this causes an even more severe psychological reaction in the subject often leading to paranoid tendencies and [REDACTED]. Addendum I: Incident 6350-01 On [DATE EXPUNGED], while viewing a non-anomalous VHS copy of Terminator 2 as part of an unrelated test, Dr. Richardson reported an abnormality during the film's climax; the T-800, played by Arnold Schwarzenegger, appeared to "consume" John Connor, played by Edward Furlong, in a manner similar to that of the aforementioned scene in SCP-6350-01. John Connor screams for approximately 35 minutes, with multiple muscles and bones "popping" through the epidermis until his death. Subsequent analysis confirmed that this copy of Terminator 2 was present at Site-205 in relatively close proximity to SCP-6350. The containment procedures have been revised. Addendum II: Incident 6350-02 On [DATE EXPUNGED], while viewing CCTV security footage from Site-205, Security Agent Franklin reported an event on Tape 305 between Agents Carlson and Harriet similar to that of SCP-6350-01. Chiefly, Agent Carlson [REDACTED] Agent Harriet, resulting in a loss of all tissue save for teeth, hair, and nail fragments. Agents Carlson and Harriet are alive as of this writing and expressed no knowledge of any of the events depicted in Tape 305. Further revision of SCP-6350's containment procedures is pending. Addendum III: Incident 6350-03 On [DATE EXPUNGED], several members of Site-205 staff reported hearing the phrase "Slurp, slurp" over the site PA system. The PA system was subsequently disabled and a thorough analysis of the access log is ongoing. Addendum IV: Incident 6350-04 [REDACTED] Addendum V: Incident 6350-05 Following Incident 6350-04 and the associated catastrophic loss of human life, SCP-6350 has been reclassified as Euclid by direct order of O5 Command. All cameras and video recording equipment have been removed from Site-205 pending revision of the special containment procedures. Given the high number of individuals recorded by Site-205 security cameras prior to Incident 6350-04, full containment of SCP-6350's anomalous properties is unfeasible. All previous site personnel have been temporarily detained. Any stretching or feelings of joint pain from these individuals are to be treated as a containment breach. Current site casualties caused by SCP-6305 stand at seven. Addendum VI: Incident 6350-06 On subsequent playbacks, SCP-6350-01 has changed dramatically. Chiefly, the scene in which the male actor consumes the female actor is now the only scene in the film, but neither actor is present. SCP-6350-01 depicts an empty hotel room for approximately one and a half hours, with occasional human vocalizations present in the background. Following boosting of the gain on recordings of SCP-6350-01, research staff were able to make out sounds consistent with laughing, retching, "slurping," and consumption of flesh. The quality of this audio was noted as dramatically higher than would be expected from a VHS tape.

SCP-842 is a 2m x 0.

*** Item #: SCP-842 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-842 is housed at Site-19 in a standard 10 m x 10 m x 5 m containment cell. All telephone lines, radio transceivers, internet connections, and other communication equipment to aid in the use of SCP-842 must be routed through a central server administered by Site-19 security. Maintenance of equipment is to be done on a monthly basis, or upon request of administrator. No security measures beyond a standard locked Foundation security door are required. Access to SCP-842 is to be restricted to researchers with Level 4 clearance or MTF Commanders with authorization from O5 personnel. Written proposals for use of SCP-842 are to be made at least one week before requested use, and must detail the purpose of the operation and the estimated time of use. All class-D personnel required for use of SCP-842 are to be escorted by no fewer than two Level 3 Security personnel. Backup class-D personnel are to be kept in the adjoining containment cell, and are to be prepped for use in SCP-842 by onsite medical personnel at least one day before use. No more than one class-D is to be allowed inside SCP-842’s containment area at any time (aside from the class-D in use by SCP-842), and must be restrained by a four point harness. Description: SCP-842 is a 2 m x 0.8 m dilapidated antique operating table capable of remote viewing and surveillance. SCP-842 will use SCP-842-1 to display terrain, buildings, objects, and entities within the chosen viewing area. SCP-842-1 will be altered to mimic the chosen viewing area in real time, and any alterations of the viewing area or updated information will be displayed immediately on SCP-842-1. SCP-842 will not display any anomalous properties until a living human lays face up on the table. Once the subject lays face up on the table, the subject becomes completely immobilized from the neck down, and is henceforth designated SCP-842-1. As long as SCP-842-1 remains alive, it cannot be removed from the table. Remote viewing begins when a human touches SCP-842 while “thinking” about the area he wishes to see. GPS coordinates, longitude & latitude, first hand knowledge of the location, and/or observation of a detailed map of the area is sufficient to allow activation of SCP-842. The person who first initiates SCP-842 controls the viewing area until the expiration of SCP-842-1. If the controller wishes to view different areas, other floors, or increase or decrease magnification, he merely needs to “think” about it. Objects are three dimensionally rendered on SCP-842-1 by the near instantaneous alteration of SCP-842-1’s body. How this is accomplished is unknown at this time. Musculature and bone are the most commonly used materials to render objects but [DATA EXPUNGED] have sometimes been noted. The controller may “tag” objects or individuals with text. The text is displayed by use of veins and arteries. Sound from the remote viewing area is channeled directly through SCP-842-1's own vocalizations. However, due to the fact that SCP-842-1 is fully aware of the trauma being inflicted, SCP-842-1’s screams make deciphering sound from the viewing area difficult. SCP-842-1 must remain conscious through the entire process to maintain real time updates. Anesthesia or lobotomies drastically affect image fidelity and are not recommended. Medical personnel preparing class-D subjects for use are to remove the subject’s larynx unless specific requests to the contrary are made. SCP-842-1 tends to survive generally between fifteen to twenty minutes, depending on the subject’s physical health, the complexity of the rendition, the frequency of real time updates that are required by the viewing, and the number of times changes of viewpoint which would require large scale construction of a different view are required. Upon expiration of the subject, real time updates of the viewing area cease and the subject at this point can be removed from the table. Autopsies conducted on the corpses recovered after use demonstrate massive internal and external injuries. Organs are compacted, moved, or [DATA EXPUNGED] completely. Musculature and bone are warped to a degree to make them unrecognizable as any bodily structure. It is unknown how SCP-842-1 survives the continuous changes inflicted on its body or fails to go into immediate shock. Users should note that SCP-842 does have limitations. It is impossible to view areas underneath fifteen feet of solid mass. Additionally, the wider the area viewed, the more SCP-842 relies on the controller’s own knowledge or expectation of information regarding the area rather than SCP-842’s seemingly omnipresent abilities. At “short range viewing,” generally within the 10 m x 10 m area, the rendition will be nearly 100% accurate. At intermediate range, around the 200 m x 200 m distance, tokens only represent the general area (within 10 m) which the object could be located. Long ranges of greater than 200 m are strictly limited to terrain and the controller’s personal knowledge and/or expectation. Finally areas of high psychic activity or other EM interference can render information gained by SCP-842 highly unreliable. SCP-842 is not to be used for “fishing expeditions.” Unless the controller knows specifically which location is desired or what information is sought, class-D personnel are consumed at an unacceptable rate. Recovery Log: SCP-842 was recovered in a raid on an ad hoc Chaos Insurgency facility located in the Ural Mountains on █/█/██. Foundation agents had received a tip that the Insurgency was transporting several SCP objects and had temporarily established a base camp in the abandoned town of ███. Foundation casualties numbered over █ agents and █ class-D personnel. The unusually high casualties that were sustained were attributed to the Chaos Insurgency commanders using SCP-842 to organize their defense. Only due to Agent [DATA EXPUNGED]’s quick thinking and uncommon valor was [DATA EXPUNGED] and the object brought into containment. Test Log SCP-842: Subject: Corpse of previously terminated class-D. Area to be viewed: An adjoining containment cell containing D-457 sitting in a chair. Result: No result. Subject: Sedated Papio anubis (Olive Baboon). Area to be viewed: An adjoining containment cell containing D-457 sitting in a chair. Result: No result. Subject: D-458 – Heavily Sedated. Area to be viewed: An adjoining containment cell containing D-457 sitting in a chair. Result: Upon touching the table, Dr. ███ immediately noted bones and sinew erupting from D-458’s chest area while D-458’s arms and legs fused into the central mass to form a roughly even block covering SCP-842. Despite the massive trauma done to D-458, he did not expire or lapse into shock. No blood or bodily fluid spray occurred. The three dimensional representation of the adjoining containment room was highly distorted, and no recognizable details could be made out. D-458 expired after twenty two minutes of viewing. Cause of death, massive internal trauma. Subject: D-459. Area to be viewed: An adjoining containment cell containing one D-457 sitting in a chair. Result: The three dimensional representation of the adjoining containment room immediately erupted from D-459’s chest. D-459 begins screaming. Before security could return with a gag, D-459 overheard muttering “wish I had a cigarette” in between screams. Details on the representation were extremely fine including an accurate scale representation of the chair and D-457 seemingly made out of [DATA EXPUNGED]. During the experiment, the representation of D-457 got up from the chair and began moving about the viewing area. D-459’s screams at this point intensified. D-459 expired after twenty two minutes of viewing. Review of surveillance information in D-457’s room confirms the representation on D-459 completely and accurately mirrored D-457’s actions, including his request for a cigarette. Subject: D-460. Area to be viewed: A supermarket that Dr. ███ had never personally visited. Prior to this experiment Dr. ███ was shown the location of the target area on a map. Result: The three dimensional representation of the supermarket and surrounding parking lot rendered. Small “tokens” made of [DATA EXPUNGED] rendering cars and people moving about the store. Dr. ███ was able to view the inside of the store by thinking about removing the roof from the representation. Upon the thought, the flesh and arteries that made up the “roof” of the supermarket rapidly would grow or retract. Dr. ███ thought about viewing the produce section in detail. The representation rapidly reconstructed into the produce section, showing objects and people moving through the area in much greater detail. Subject expired after seven minutes. Subject: D-461. Area to be viewed: All Foundation assets in North America. Dr. ███ was not provided any information regarding O5 Command Level information regarding distribution of Foundation resources. Result: An accurate rendition of North America was created. The only map tokens generated however were for Site 19 and one for Dr. ███, which the controller was aware that Dr. ███ was taking a vacation in the city located near the token. The controller was then told Agent ███ was on assignment in [REDACTED]. A new token representing Agent ███ was instantly generated. Subject: D-462. Area to be viewed: The nucleus of carbon atom held in a vacuum in Site-19, Lab █. Result: Upon touching the table [DATA EXPUNGED] resulting in two weeks clean up and █ casualties. Testing on the quantum or stellar scale has been indefinitely suspended.

SCP-4682 is a common silver glass mirror made of non-anomalous materials.

*** Item #: SCP-4682 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-4682 is contained in a secure storage locker in Site-19. SCP-4682 is to remain wrapped in opaque material. Viewing SCP-4682 is strictly prohibited. Individuals subjected to the effects of SCP-4682 are advised to avoid reflective surfaces, and are restricted from appearing or being depicted in visual media or observed through means other than the naked eye for their own mental health. Affected individuals should also undergo monthly or weekly therapy sessions with a member of Schuyler & Crane Psychiatry, as determined by Foundation psychologists. Description: SCP-4682 is a common silver glass mirror made of non-anomalous materials. The anomalous properties take effect when an individual observes their own reflection in SCP-4682. When they see themselves in SCP-4682, they will perceive minor physical deformities or imperfections in their appearance. These imperfections are present in video footage and photographs1 of affected individuals but are not visible to the naked eye. Common instances of recorded imperfections in D-class test subjects include: Incorrect facial proportions, such as eyes being too close together or too far apart; Incorrect body proportions, such as grossly incorrect height and weight; Acne, eczema, first-degree burns, and other skin conditions of varying extremity; Rotting or yellowing teeth, or cavities; Facial features generally seen as conventionally unattractive, such as unibrows or patchy beards, and; Bodily features generally seen as conventionally unattractive, such as gangly limbs or excessive body hair. This effect is cumulative: whenever an affected person sees themselves in a reflective surface (such as another mirror, a blank computer screen, or a polished surface) they will perceive another imperfection each additional time they view their own reflection. The phenomenon does not appear to "spread" from surface to surface, but those viewing the reflection of an affected individual will still perceive the flaws. Discovery: SCP-4682 was discovered in an apartment complex in Broken Bow, Oklahoma when local police were called to the scene to investigate a resident was reported missing by his boyfriend. They discovered the corpse of [REDACTED] next to a tumbler containing trace amounts of what was later determined to be a mixture of Robitussin and Jack Daniel's brand whiskey. An undercover member of MTF Iota-10 ("Damn Feds") noticed that, with one exception, all reflective surfaces were either smashed or painted over, and advised Foundation personnel to investigate. MTF Eta-10 ("See No Evil") was sent in to assess the situation. They discovered SCP-4682 in the tenet's bedroom laying intact on the carpet, at which point it was recovered and put into containment. A suicide note was also discovered at the apartment: Rob, I'm sorry. Please don't hate me. I'm doing this because I love you. I love you as much as I hate myself. I can't stand the sight of my own reflection. I backed into my neighbor's car the other day because I couldn't meet my own eyes in the rear-view mirror. I'm becoming stupid as well as ugly. I can't look at myself for one more second. I smashed the bathroom mirror, but I could still see myself in the pieces on the floor. I threw them away, and caught my ugly face in the reflection of the dishwasher. Stomped on my phone when I saw myself in the glass protector. I even took a hammer to the hand mirror you bought me. I hit it over and over until it was nothing but shards and splinters, but I couldn't stop seeing myself in every little sliver of glass. I thought about putting a nail in my eyes so I wouldn't have to look at myself, but that would just make things worse. My ugly face is everywhere, on everything, and there's only one way to avoid it for good. I never understood what you saw in my worthless ass, but I think your feelings blinded you to how hideous I really am. You're in love with me, so you see me through rose-colored glasses. You love your ugly boyfriend in spite of his crooked teeth and his chewed-up nails. It's very noble of you, really, but you can do better. You deserve better, and now you don't have me holding you back anymore. I'm going to mix myself something to drink. This life didn't work out so well for me. Maybe the next one will be better. With love, [REDACTED] Footnotes 1. Results with artistic depictions are inconclusive. Imperfections will be present if the subject is being depicted in a realistic manner, but caricatures and abstract works are rarely affected.

SCP-1213 is a wooden and steel catapult, medieval in design, 1.

*** Item #: SCP-1213 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-1213 is to be strapped immobile in a locked shipping container, stored in Sector-25. SCP-1213 is not to be allowed within 20 meters of juvenile mammals weighing between 15 and 50 kilograms, except for testing purposes. Description: SCP-1213 is a wooden and steel catapult, medieval in design, 1.4 meters wide and 2.6 meters long. SCP-1213 is capable of autonomous locomotion on its four wooden wheels and of operating its firing mechanism by an unknown method. Aside from its anomalous movement and operation SCP-1213 has no unusual physical properties. Given space to move, SCP-1213 will haphazardly explore an area. Should SCP-1213 encounter a suitable subject, SCP-1213 will transport the subject into the basket on its firing arm by unknown means. SCP-1213 must be within 10 meters of its subject in order to transport it. SCP-1213 will then launch the subject at the nearest flat vertical surface. After a launching it will remain stationary, emitting a sound similar to the contented purring produced by felines while it resets its firing arm. SCP-1213 will then resume its haphazard exploration. SCP-1213's firing arm can be strapped down, but any strapping will break should SCP-1213 launch a subject. SCP-1213 favors infant to prepubescent mammalian subjects that weigh between 15 and 50 kilograms. SCP-1213 has also been known to launch subjects with dwarfism on occasion. SCP-1213 was found in █████, a farming town in England, after several unexplainable cases of dead children and small animals that were reported as having been "hurled into walls at high velocity". A search of the town found SCP-1213 in the bushes of a school playground. Further investigation of the town led to the discovery of an improvised laboratory in an abandoned farmhouse. Much of the laboratory was destroyed by an explosion, presumably caused by the large defunct device that was the focus of the laboratory. The device was the experimental work of Dr. ████████, who could not be located. Dr. ████████'s damaged research log was discovered in pieces amongst the debris of the warehouse, and only excerpts could be retrieved. Excerpts of Dr. ████████'s research log: Pieces of text that were missing, burnt or otherwise illegible are marked with […] I've done it. I've finished. I've pressed the button. I flipped the switch. I've changed the world forever. Even as I sit here it opens […] […] the noise is unbearable, I can see objects moving beyond […] Any dimension. EVERY dimension. I can see won[…] If only I could interact […] access […] perhaps I […] This […] particular is fascinating to me […] impossible, but […] I can't deny […] There are families of them, unbelievable, all different types […] what we would believe to […] inanimate […] different 'species' […] The tire-irons seem particularly amiable, […] […] somehow t[…] whatever i did, it worked […] but it's here now, in this […] I think it's separated from its 'parents' […] I've grown fond of it, it […] no family of my […] so long […] alone working […] Its abandonment here […] grown an animosity […] can't keep it […] […]uck! I can't s[…] I've […] should reduce massive dam[…] town is safe […] but I can't find Hurley any[…] found Su[…] splatt[…] Robert like a tomato […], oh my god.

SCP-104 is a sphere, 35.

*** Item #: SCP-104 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: SCP-104 is currently contained in a steel box with electronic keypad access. Access is to be restricted to class 3 and higher. Do not allow SCP-104 to come in contact with any living tissue. Any and all interaction with SCP-104 is to be handled via robotic assistance, or with full haz-mat suits and gloves. Anyone found to be “imprinted” by SCP-104 must submit for “unimprinting”. Failure to do so within 24 hours of exposure will result in termination. Description: SCP-104 is a sphere, 35.5 cm (14 in) around and weighing 2.3 kg (5 lbs). The outside is glass and very smooth, coating the sphere in a layer 6 mm (0.2 in) thick. Under this layer is an extremely intricate design of very thin black and white lines. This inner “core” is a delicately carved ball of wood, giving slight texture to the line design. The design itself is unimaginably complex and seems to form something of a Rorschach test, as all viewers seem to have a different interpretation. Movement or a ticking sound from inside the sphere has been reported, but at this time is unconfirmed. Whenever a human touches SCP-104 in its “Unimprinted” state, it will “Imprint” on the subject. If the imprinted subject moves more than 9 m (30 ft) from SCP-104 for more than five minutes, SCP-104 will appear within 2 m (7 ft) of the imprinted subject. This shift appears instantaneous, disappearing and reappearing in less than a nanosecond, regardless of distance or intervening objects. Every hour that the subject remains within 9 m (30 ft) of SCP-104, it will move one foot closer to the subject until it is touching the subject. When SCP-104 is touching its imprinted subject, it will not attempt to move closer. SCP-104 will not exhibit this behavior to non-imprinted subjects and will only imprint on one subject at a time. Thick cloth or metal appears to block the imprinting in most cases. Testing of SCP-104 with multiple instances of SCP-1680 suggests this imprinting is not genetically based, as SCP-104 does not change behaviors when faced with multiple genetically identical subjects. SCP-104 also appears to be indestructible, in that it always appears whole and undamaged after reappearing. Even after being crushed and incinerated, SCP-104 will reappear whole and undamaged if its imprinted subject is outside of its minimum range for more than five minutes. SCP-104 causes paranoia and anger in most subjects, but this is not an effect of the sphere as some are wholly unaffected by the constant presence of SCP-104, if slightly annoyed at times. SCP-104 can only be “unimprinted” if the subject is killed or enters a near-death like state. SCP-104 will then enter its unimprinted state until touched. Thick gloves appear to block the imprinting process, as long as they are more than 13 mm (0.5 in) thick. SCP-104 was recovered in a flea market from a man carrying it in a bowling bag. The man never identified himself and sold it to Agent ███████ for a quarter, thanking him profusely before running off. Notes 104-1108-r: It has been theorized that SCP-104 is some form of extra-dimensional probe or recording device. This appears to be unlikely, as it appears to be made of terrestrial materials and has no means by which to record or observe anything. However, with few other explanations for its odd behavior, the theory is being investigated. —Dr. █████

SCP-6656 is a 15 meter long shattered bow currently located at the bottom of the Mediterranean Sea, approximately 20 kilometers off the shore of Paphos, Cyprus.

*** Item#: 6656 Level4 Containment Class: safe Secondary Class: none Disruption Class: dark Risk Class: notice link to memo Foundation Submarine SCPF Bottlenose returning to port after first spotting SCP-6656. Special Containment Procedures: Foundation submarines in the Mediterranean Sea have begun the process of transferring SCP-6656 to Site-24 for initial containment. No further precautions are necessary at this time. Description: SCP-6656 is a 15 meter long shattered bow currently located at the bottom of the Mediterranean Sea, approximately 20 kilometers off the shore of Paphos, Cyprus. SCP-6656's shaft appears to be made out of oak wood, despite exhibiting neither damage from continued presence underwater nor buoyancy. Additionally, both the shaft and the cord of the bow have proven resilient to all attempts to harm their structural integrity, such as the collection of samples. The method by which SCP-6656's shaft was broken in two despite the above property is currently unknown. Update 23/8/2020: A day following the successful dislodging of SCP-6656 and the beginning of its movement towards the Levantine coast, the following message was received by multiple Foundation contacts with the Global Occult Coalition. Notice from the Undersecreteriat The Undersecreteriat of the United Nations Global Occult Coalition and the Occult Council (the Coalition) hereby inform the SCP Foundation (the Foundation) of the following, as was mandated upon them by Occult Council Resolution 71/6. The Coalition, Having learned that the Foundation is in possession of Known Threat Entity 4251 Caliburn, "Aqhat's Bow"; Having noted the known connections of the above to other Threat Entities under Coalition supervision; Having surmised that the Foundation plans to store KTE-4251 in one of its sites; Having considered the immense harm that may be caused to the region of the Eastern Mediterranean if the Threat Entity is extracted; Demands the following: That attempts by the Foundation to extract KTE-4251 from its original location immediately cease; That negotiations open between the Coalition and the Foundation regarding the transfer of KTE-4251 to Coalition custody and its eventual liquidation; The transfer of all files held by the Foundation which are relevant to Project ZAPHON. The Coalition believes the above terms are necessary for the continued success of both our organizations' missions. The Foundation initially complied with the first request, halting the SCPF Bakdash, which was towing SCP-6656 at the time. This was done in order to allow time for the establishment of reliable communications on the topic. A full record of attempted agreements regarding the GOC's demands can be found in addendum 6656.TALKS. Following a week of talks, Foundation negotiators advised that the SCPF Bakdash continue moving slowly towards its destination, in order to exert pressure on the GOC to come to a favourable agreement. Approximately three days following the above, a GOC miniature submarine severed the towline connecting the Bakdash with SCP-6656. It is unknown how the submarine was able to come close enough to do so without being detected. However, once known, a surrounding barrage of depth charges forced it to rise, and its crew was captured shortly before the vessel self-destructed. The following is an interview conducted immediately following the events described above. Interviewed: Captain Ioannou, UNGOCNFS Goldfish Interviewer: Captain Nesher, SCPF Bakdash <Begin Log> Captain Ioannou enters Captain Nesher's office. Nesher looks up at her from his paperwork. Nesher: Please, take a seat. Ioannou remains standing. Nesher returns to his papers. Nesher: I understand that you are the captain of the vessel that attempted to sabotage our mission? At least, judging by how the rest of the crew looks at you. I do know how sailors glance at a defeated captain. Ioannou keeps silent. Nesher puts down his papers. Nesher: Listen, I know you're Coalition. You were wearing identification badges, for God's sake. I didn't even know the Coalition issued identification badges. Nesher: And now, that makes me wonder. Since you wanted us to know who you are, I must assume you know who we are. And since you knew who it is you were dealing with, you must've known this wasn't worth the week, at most, that it'll take us to pick that thing up again. So I must assume you weren't sent here just to cut a string. He leans forward. Nesher: So, Captain Ioannou. What is your mission here? Silence. Ioannou: I'm here to deliver a message. Nesher: Chuckles. Nesher: Good thing you were captured, then. Would've been hard to deliver your message if we just blew your ship out of the water. Ioannou: I was sent to deliver a message through action, but let me punctuate it with a message through words. Ioannou: It's critical to the Coalition that KTE-4251 doesn't make it ashore. Negotiations are always preferred, but since you proved that you won't play fair, we've been sent to stop you. If you'll continue, I doubt we'll be the last the coalition sends. Nesher: Only we have you on board, now. Would be a shame if any of you got injured during another GOC attack. Ioannou: Project ZAPHON is bigger and more important than just me and my crew. Nesher: I see. Project ZAPHON? Project "north"1? Ioannou: Project "classified", for you. Nesher: Classified. Hmm. Nesher stands and slowly walks up to Ioannou. Nesher: There is a major difference between our organisations, Ioannou. Nesher: You, the Coalition, you're absolute experts at killing things. Masters at it. The Foundation, now - we're great at keeping things alive. Why, we have several experts on the topic on this very ship. He glances at her. Nesher: You know that. Nesher turns back to his seat. Nesher: I can guarantee to you, Captain, that no matter how long you hold your tongue, your crew won't die. Not quite, at least. Sitting down, he glances at Ioannou. Nesher: Will you take a seat, now? Silence. Nesher: I have noticed - there's a fellow in your crew that also has the surname Ioannou. Now, isn't that a coincidence. Silence. Slowly, Captain Ioannou sits down. Nesher: There we are. Much more comfortable. Ioannou: I don't know much about the project at large. Nesher nods. Ioannou: I know what I already told you. I know my submarine's usual task, which is maintaining some exclusion zone near Syria. Which I also know you know of. Nesher: That much we do. Ioannou: I know the suborganisations involved. The New Templars, the Mossad's Yeda' Zoher branch. A bunch of Satanists. Hell, even ORIA sent representatives once. Pretty much every suborganisation with an interest in the Middle East sent people to visit the exclusion zone. Nesher: And yet you won't tell the Foundation what it is you're keeping in there. Or why you don't want this bow to get ashore. Ioannou: The bow? I was only told that we can't let it fall into the wrong hands. I don't doubt that would cost innocent lives, captain. Nesher: Very well. If you excuse me, now, I've just remembered a pressing correspondence I need to issue. Don't worry, though. We'll have plenty of conversations in the days to come. <End Log> To: Site-24 Command (pcs.42etis|dnammoc#pcs.42etis|dnammoc) From: Captain Joseph Nesher (pcs.demfpcs|nfesoy#pcs.demfpcs|nfesoy) Subject: Re: Re: SCP-6656 towline incident Good evening. I have interviewed the persons rescued from the submarine that attacked us this morning. According on the information provided, the strike was coordinated under the GOC's "Project ZAPHON". Based on said information, I believe Project ZAPHON constitutes an attempt by the GOC to coordinate and execute anti-Foundation activity. Also according to the conducted interviews, the containment and study of SCP-6656 by the Foundation would land a major blow to Project ZAPHON. I recommend that the Foundation immediately halt all negotiations regarding the transfer of SCP-6656. I have already begun retrieval efforts. To: Captain Joseph Nesher (pcs.demfpcs|nfesoy#pcs.demfpcs|nfesoy) From: Site 24 Command (pcs.42etis|dnammoc#pcs.42etis|dnammoc) Subject: Re: Re: Re: SCP-6656 towline incident Interviewing personnel from a major GoI without authorization would normally carry consequence. You are invited to Site-24 once this is over. Your recommendations were forwarded and approved. Update 3/9/2020: Upon the retrieval and continued towing of SCP-6656, GOC researcher Habib Nour, one of the personnel recovered from the Goldfish, was found dead in his cell having hanged himself using his belt. Further inquiries revealed that researcher Nour was the acting mission specialist aboard the Goldfish, and knew significantly more about the nature of project ZAPHON. Ioannou has been penalized for withholding this information. Over the following days, further negotiation attempts were made by the GOC, all of which were rejected. Eventually, the Foundation announced that any transfer of SCP-6656 would only occur after the immediate cessation of Project ZAPHON activities, and closed negotiations. On the 5/9/2020, SCP-6656 arrived at the port of Beirut and was loaded into a truck, which was to be escorted to Site-24. This convoy never arrived at its destination. The following is a log composed of surviving camera footage. 5:31 to 8:56: The convoy drives as planned. 8:56: Multiple agents communicate feeling an earthquake; The convoy chooses a spot to stop at on the side of the road until the quake passes. 8:57: As the convoy stops, the truck carrying SCP-6656 is violently launched into the air. Personnel dismount their vehicles to search for the threat. 8:59: An enormous dusty hand emerges from the ground and moves to grab the overturned truck. Personnel open fire. The hand flails backwards, striking multiple personnel. Simultaneously, a second hand emerges, as well as a femoid upper torso and a head covered with long, strawlike hair. Personnel concentrate fire on the latter. The entity swings one of its arms around while using the other to pull itself further out of the ground. Where the side of the hand strikes, objects are sliced cleanly despite it being nearly 20cm thick. 9:00 to 9:01: Personnel retrieve the emergency RPG from one of the cars, and fire a missile at the entity. The missile hits one of its hands and explodes. When the dust clear, only a bloodless stump remains of the entity's lower arm. The entity stares at its missing hand for a moment before fully pulling itself above the ground and raising its stump above its head. All personnel's weapons are immediately pulled from their hands and towards the stump, where they clump together. The entity lowers its arm, and the guns begin firing. 9:01 to 9:03: [Removed for brevity.] 9:03: The entity reaches the truck and slices it open with the side of its hand. 9:03 to 9:08: The entity stares at SCP-6656. 9:08: The entity collects SCP-6656 and turns to leave. For the first time, the cuneiform letters 𐎓𐎐𐎚 are clearly visible on its forehead. As it strides away, it slowly sinks into the ground, taking SCP-6656 with it. Update 13/9/2020: The Foundation has contacted the GOC regarding its potential entry into Project ZAPHON. Further updates pending. Footnotes 1. Captain Nesher is a native Hebrew speaker.

SCP-645 is a large disk of Pavonazzetto marble with a humanoid face carved into it, similar to the famous Bocca della Verità carving in the church of Santa Maria in Cosmedin in Rome, Italy.

*** Item #: SCP-645 Object Class: Safe Euclid Special Containment Procedures: SCP-645 is to be kept in a padded crate two (2) meters by two (2) meters by one (1) meter. Personnel within a ten (10)-meter radius of SCP-645 are to refrain from all statements which may be considered untruthful or deceitful. SCP-645 is to be cleaned after each activation. Description: SCP-645 is a large disk of Pavonazzetto marble with a humanoid face carved into it, similar to the famous Bocca della Verità carving in the church of Santa Maria in Cosmedin in Rome, Italy. As with the Bocca carving, the mouth and eyes are empty holes; unlike with the Bocca carving, however, subjects who place their hands inside SCP-645's mouth describe it as 'warm' and 'moist'. SCP-645 embodies, and has been hypothesized by Foundation folklorists to be the origin of, the lie-detection properties attributed to the Bocca carving since medieval times: any subject who tells a lie (see incident report 645-N41) while their hand is within the carving's mouth will activate the carving, which will then bite off the subject's hand at the wrist and swallow it. High-speed cameras have revealed that this process, which lasts less than 0.3 seconds, involves the manifestation of lips, gingiva, and disproportionately large incisor teeth; the lips cauterize the injury via an unknown mechanism, after which the lips, gingiva, and teeth de-manifest. The force exercised by the teeth has not been accurately measured, but is sufficient to sever a steel rod held in the hand being bitten off. Probes of SCP-645's mouth in its inert state have revealed no esophagus; as such, the ultimate fate of the severed hands is unknown. RFID tags implanted in the hands of D-class personnel have been unlocatable, and sonograms of SCP-645 indicate that it is solid Pavonazzetto marble with no inclusions. Recovery: SCP-645 was discovered during routine archaeological excavations in ██████, Italy, in 19██. The slab of marble bearing the carving was not attached to any building, and had been bricked over; archaeologist ████████ ██████ expressed the opinion that it seemed to have been deliberately buried. 48 hours after being discovered, SCP-645 mutilated a graduate student who had been participating in the excavation; Foundation agents in the Italian Ministry of Cultural Heritage and Activities intercepted the injury reports and retrieved the object. Incident report 645-N41: On ██/██/██, D-45951 was enlisted for experiments to study both the criteria by which SCP-645 assesses statements as lies, and the mechanism by which it severs hands. Unexpectedly, D-45951 was able to deduce SCP-645's anomalous properties prior to testing, due to cultural knowledge of the properties folklorically attributed to the Bocca carving. Consequently, D-45951 disobeyed instructions as to how he should interact with SCP-645, which ultimately revealed further anomalous properties. Transcript of audio log. Dr. Rensburg: Insert your left hand into the carving's mouth. Good. Now, say the phrase "The sky is bright green." D-45951: (silence) Dr. Rensburg: D-45951? D-45951: … The sky is green is what these guys told me to say. Dr. Long: What was that? Dr. Rensburg Why didn't it activate? Dr. Long: Let's try another one. D-45951, say this: 'I have six fingers'. D-45951: … these guys want me to sayI have six fingersbut really I don't. Dr. Rensburg: I definitely heard him that time. What do you think you're doing! Dr. Long: You're interfering with the experiment! D-45951: There was a movie! Dr. Rensburg: What? D-45951: In the movie1, there was a, a statue thing that looked like this one, and they said if you put your hand in and lie, it bites your hand off! Dr. Rensburg: That's ridiculous. Are you going to comply with instructions, or do we have to get the guard involved? Dr. Long: No, wait. Let's hear him out; surely intent matters? Guard: Do you want me to — Dr. Rensburg: Hm. You know, that's actually a very good — (At this point, D-45951 removes his hand from SCP-645's mouth) Dr. Long: Hey! Keep your hand in — Dr. Rensburg: Guard! Hold his arm! Keep his hand in its mouth! (D-45951's hand is forcibly re-inserted into SCP-645's mouth) Dr. Long: Let's see, where were we… oh yes. What was this movie about? D-45951: [PLOT SYNOPSIS OMITTED] Dr. Long: Hmm. Well, we'll have someone look that up, thank you for the information. But honestly, you know the difference between movies and real life, don't you? Do you really think the carving will bite your hand off, just because some guy in a movie told a story about it? You even said that the guy in the movie was lying about it, right? D-45951: I… I dunno! I… look, I wouldn't'a believed… I mean, I don't think I woulda believed it, before I came here and saw all the weird shit you guys've got here, all the monsters and shit, but now that I seen it all, it made me think maybe it… I mean… that's how I'm explaining it right now, it didn't all go through my head word for word right then, but you know, people… I mean, a lot of people, maybe not everybody in the world, I dunno — a lot of people are like that… uh, what's the question? I lost — I kinda lost track, only kinda, I mean, we're still talking about the statue, right? Dr. Rensburg: Uh, yes. Do you think, just because of the movie, that the statue will — D-45951: Oh, right, right. Yeah, I… well, I don't know for sure, but I'm thinking that, that maybe it will, because of … well, because of a bunch of stuff, like part of it is that movie that I… that I saw part of on TV one ti— at least one time, and I thought it was just a load of cra— I, I, I mean, looking back at what I was thinking back then, I guess I didn't really believe it, 'cause it was just something in a — I thought it was just something in a movie, and stuff in movies isn't re— I mean, a lot of stuff in movies isn't, isn't really real, not like real life is OR AT LEAST THAT'S WHAT I ALWAYS THOUGHT EXCEPT NOT 'ALWAYS' LIKE ALL THE TIME oh god please don't bite my hand off Dr. Long: Interesting. Let's see what we had on the list… ah yes. D-45951… what's your name? D-45951: That's kinda complic— I mean, the question isn't, I guess the question isn't complicated, but the answer is, is kinda complicated, like, the name that everybody called me, well, not everybody everybody, like not everybody in the world, but, y'know, people in my life? Most of the — a lot of the people in my life, they called me [REDACTED], but when I was born, my name was — I mean, like, a little while after I was born, my parents said my name was [REDACTED], so that could be my name too, sort of, and, uh, you guys call me D-45951, or that's what you been calling me, maybe you'll change your minds later, I dunno, it's up to you, I guess? Dr. Rensburg: Fascinating. How about… D-45951, say "two thousand eight hundred and nine is a prime number". D-45951: Are you fuckin' serious? I — Dr. Rensburg: Guard? D-45951: No! No, I'll — look, I dunno what that m— I mean, I know those words by themselves, but the whole thing doesn't — I mean, obviously it's some sort of… well, OBVIOUS maybe isn't the right word, but I guess it's some kind of math thing? Like, I remember hearing about prime numbers on the… I kinda remember hearing about them, and I kinda think it was on the news, but I'm not like a hundred percent sure, oh jeeze, and I was never — well, I mean, when I was in school, I wasn't… I didn't do that good in math when I was in school, a lot of the time, except when I cheated except maybe that's not the same as me doing good in math, and, uh, I guess I did okay back when I was real little and it was super simple? Dr. Long: Impressive. How about… Dr. Rensburg: Yes, that's a good one: D-45951, do you ever lie? D-45951: N— I mean… I, I, everybody— I told, I used to tell… in the past I said stuff that maybe wasn't, okay, no 'maybe', stuff that wasn't true, but I'm not gonna… I mean… I don't think I'm gonna… I mean… right now, with my hand stuck in this thing's mouth, I'm trying real real hard to not say anything that's not super absolute true. Dr. Long: … Wow. You're really, really scared, aren't you. D-45951: Oh fuck yes. Dr. Rensburg: Just because of the movie? D-45951: Look, we went — I mean, I went over that already! It's 'cause of the movie that I know, that I think I know what it is, and seeing all the mons… seeing the monsters you got here, I dunno if I saw all of 'em — seeing the monsters is what tells me that it's for, that maybe it's for real! Plus, I mean, why would you be doing this stuff with me sticking my hand in here and then you telling me to say shit if you weren't expecting it to bite my hand off, right? Why else would you have this assho— this guy holding my arm so I can't — so I probably can't pull my hand out? Dr. Long: He has a point. Dr. Rensburg: Oh, don't go feeling sorry for him. D-45951, do you deserve this? D-45951: Uh, what? Dr. Rensburg: This! The way we're treating you! Being D-class personnel! Do you deserve it! D-45951: You don't hafta yell at me. Dr. Rensburg: Did you commit the crimes you were convicted of committing! Yes or no! D-45951: I… look, the fuckin' cop was self-defense, okay? Her or me, right? Dr. Rensburg: And the others? Were they all self-defense too? Guard: Uh, sir? D-45951: Well, I… I mean… look, they were witnesses, and… I mean, they coulda… I mean… I thought they coulda… I, I… look, it was… I… I mean… no, you know what? No. No they fucking weren't self-defense. I didn't think I had to kill 'em, I didn't think I had no fucking choice… I killed 'em because I wanted to. Because I wanted them to be dead. Because I like killing. Because I like the way it makes me feel. Because it means I have power. That honest enough for you, you big stone fuck? At this point, SCP-645 forcibly ejected D-45951's hand from its mouth; high-speed cameras show that its lips manifested, and then contorted, apparently spitting the hand out; the lips had completely de-manifested within 0.2 seconds. D-45951: What the fuck? Dr. Long: Did you take your hand out? Put your hand back in! Guard, put his hand back in! D-45951: No, I — Guard: I can't — it won't go in! It's not accepting his hand, sir. It's blocking him. Dr. Rensburg: What? (Subsequent examination revealed that, although Dr. Rensburg, Dr. Long, and Guard Dickinson were each able to insert a hand into SCP-645's mouth, D-45951 was not. Experiment was aborted.) Dr. Rensburg: Get him out of here; we'll have to requisition another D-class. Dr. Long: Preferably one who doesn't watch romantic comedies. (D-45951 is escorted out of the testing chamber.) Dr. Rensburg: Well, at least we got some results. I wonder what specifically triggered it to reject his hand? Dr. Long: Heh, maybe he really was honest enough for it. Creepy little fucker. Hey, that reminds me — how did you know the details about what he did? Dr. Rensburg: Seriously, man? I was bluffing! (At this point, SCP-645 opened its mouth to a width of approximately 70 cm, and propulsed an elongated frog-like tongue four meters across the room at Drs. Rensburg and Long. The tongue coiled around Dr. Rensburg's right wrist and severed his hand, then retracted, colliding with Dr. Long and breaking his left shoulder in the process. The tongue had fully returned to the mouth, and the mouth had returned to its normal size, within 0.7 seconds. Both doctors survived as a result of prompt medical attention; however, Dr. Rensburg's hand was too badly damaged to be reattached.) NOTE: After a thorough review of not only Incident 645-N41, but of all footage of personnel in proximity to SCP-645, I have come to the conclusion that SCP-645 is most likely sapient. This was not the first time that personnel in proximity to SCP-645 have lied or otherwise been less than honest; however, in light of D-45951's admittedly impressive performance in avoiding any untruths, and of 645's unprecedented rejection of his hand, I feel that 645's attack on Dr. Rensburg, immediately after he admitted to having deceived D-45951, was a conscious act, motivated by resentment and antipathy. Incident 645-N41 also revealed that the scope of 645's anomalous properties is far greater than we had suspected; in particular, it can no longer be considered to pass the 'locked box' test. I therefore request that its object class be upgraded to Euclid. — Site Director R. Kocharian. Approved. - O5-4. Footnotes 1. Subsequently identified as Roman Holiday, 1953, Paramount Pictures, starring Audrey Hepburn and Gregory Peck

SCP-1782 is a room measuring 42 or 45 square metres, in an abandoned apartment complex located in Kiev, Ukraine.

*** Item #: SCP-1782 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: The entrance and a perimeter of SCP-1782 are to be monitored at all times. Although SCP-1782 has not yet proven itself to be outwardly hostile, the door to the room should be guarded by at least two armed personnel at all times. The area is only to be explored by unmanned drones, which have been requisitioned since the events of 09/04/██. Description: SCP-1782 is a room measuring 42 or 45 square metres, in an abandoned apartment complex located in Kiev, Ukraine. Imprints over the archway entering the room read "jedna deväť osem d" (one nine eight d). SCP-1782's interior changes in appearance every three days at 03:12 AM. The change is instantaneous. SCP-1782 is usually furnished with typical household objects, although SCP-1782, and the objects themselves, when present, are aged significantly with signs of heavy use. The floor plan of the room varies; certain instances having a kitchen, bedroom, and living room, or simply being a large, empty space. SCP-1782 occasionally manifests what appear to be sapient entities and fauna. Objects appearing before the change vanish regardless of their proximity to SCP-1782 at exactly 03:12 AM. Further examples can be found in the area records for this object. SCP-1782 does not appear to have a detrimental effect on subjects entering. Testing subjects in all cases return from the interior of the room with a fear of holes. Exact reasons for this are unknown. Area Record 1782: Date: 08/23/██ Event: Room materializes empty. The sound of metal scraping against metal can be heard. A disembodied female voice can be heard repeating the phrase "Shakes me, makes me lighter" until 03:12 AM. Area Record 1782: Date: 08/26/██ Event: Room materializes empty. Sound does not travel through the interior, although upon further inspection a small area on the left wall of the floorplan emits a faint metallic grating noise. Area Record 1782: Date: 08/29/██ Event: An elderly human feeding itself to a group of kakapo. Did not express pain, appeared ambivalent. Excerpt from Interview 1782-831 Close SCP-1782-1: And then I'll be eaten. There's a hole in the wall in the bottom of the floor. SCP-1782-1: But I don't see how that makes any difference. What could have been? Dr. Sanders: Can you tell us what you're doing? What is your name? SCP-1782-1: It is a meat offering. Thou shalt put oil upon it, and lay incense thereon. Dr. Sanders approaches the entity and the group of birds. They are non-hostile. SCP-1782-1: Pour all the rest of the blood thereof at the foot of the altar, chickadees. In the hole in the floor. Dr. Sanders motions for a guard and instructs him to pick up one of the birds. The bird is examined and appears mundane. A skin sample is taken from the entity at this time; the results are later found to be normal. The bird is placed on the floor and it continues feeding on the entity. Dr. Sanders: Tell me what you're thinking. SCP-1782-1 behavior becomes abnormal. The subject intermittently pinches different parts of its exposed flesh, and can be seen trying to make suggestive eye contact with Dr. Sanders during this portion of the interview. SCP-1782-1: Nothing out of the ordinary. The birds are hungry though! Dr. Sanders: Do I look hungry to you? SCP-1782-1: Now what kind of question is that, you some kind of loony? Dr. Sanders: Is there something wrong? SCP-1782-1: No. I am feeling a bit bloated though. Must've been all of that sugar and brandy I drank before she brought me in here. SCP-1782-1: There's an abortion under the floorboards, one in the sink, too. Interview concluded. Area Record 1782: Date: 09/04/██ Event: Room appears with two partitions, including a bathroom housing only a toilet, and a small rectangular entrance accessible through a small hole in the wall. The room is tinted a dull green, with what appears to be caked blood and feces on certain sections of the walls. A man in an orange jumpsuit materializes instantly outside of the door to SCP-1782 with a television camera on his shoulder. Attempts to communicate with the entity are successful, although unorthodox. The entity asked that Dr. Sanders produce a small television set and stay outside of the cell, so that he could record "the girl in the wall in the bottom of the floor". Those in charge of testing obliged. The following is a transcript of the recording. Transcript 1782-904 Close 16:30:04-16:30:15: Entity enters the room. A faint noise similar to metal scraping against metal can be heard throughout the video. A decidedly upbeat pop punk song begins playing, the singer repeating the lyrics "There's a hole in the wall in the bottom of the floor / There's a girl in the wall in the bottom of the floor". Music continues until AV feed ends. 16:30:15-16:33:18: Entity takes a right towards a small, cubicle-like partition containing only a toilet. The camera is positioned over the toilet to reveal what appears to be a mutilated fetus in the basin. Video begins to distort, seemingly for some sort of artistic effect. This continues until 16:33:18, when the entity exits the 'bathroom'. 16:33:18-16:40:59: Camera pans in circles around room, temporarily reaching impossible speeds before again slowing down. The object in the toilet seen previously is cut in to view of the footage intermittently. Metallic grating grows louder. 16:40:59-16:54:00: Camera fixes on a small hole in the wall on the left side of the room. The entity places the camera on the floor and can be seen adjusting his suit before again picking up the camera. Entity heads towards the hole in the wall, entering a prone position and somehow crawling into the hole. Video goes black for 5 minutes, music continues to play, and heavy breathing can be heard from two separate sources. 16:54:00:-16:55:06 Light returns, revealing a damp, muddy area that the camera could not possibly fit in. View is centered toward the ground, gradually scrolling upwards across what initially appears to be a miniature, uncased septic tank with small, skeletal legs similar to a human's. As the view continues to scroll, a clear fluid can be seen spraying in a small funnel upwards into what is later revealed to be a human skull lacking a lower jaw or nasal cavity, with exaggerated eye sockets. Faint crying is audible as the septic tank object's 'head' moves slightly to the right with the aid of small, skeletal hands from opposing sides of the camera's view. Brown liquid sprays onto the object's face before video feed ends. Entity does not return from the hole. An RC car with some obstacle clearing capability was requisitioned and mounted with a GPS and video camera to inspect the hole of the 09/04 SCP-1782. The device successfully entered the hole and a live feed confirmed the object recorded by the previous entity. Video feed of the object reveals limbs and head of the object moving slowly up and down. Footage went on steadily past 03:12 AM, revealing that the object does not disappear during SCP-1782 cycles, although the entrance to its location is no longer present. GPS positioning reveals the location of the entity to be in the same location as Dr. Sanders, although testing reveals this to be false. Later GPS readings suggest that the device is located at any mature female within 5 meters of SCP-1782 on any given day. The entity located outside of the door prior to exploration could not be located. The area was deemed safe and Researcher Breen and Ortega were dispatched one hour before SCP-1782's reset time of 03:12 AM to receive a DNA sample from the object in the toilet. Excerpt from DNA Recovery 1782-904-2 Close Researcher Breen: Alright hand me the scalpel now. Breen leans over the toilet and, appearing startled, falls backwards. Researcher Ortega: What the hell's wrong? Researcher Breen: Thought I saw the damned thing move. Breen rights himself and leans back over the bowl to receive the sample. Breen immediately stands straight up, closes his eyes, and faces Ortega for 5 seconds. Researcher Breen: Yeah. It's moving. Right. Yeah. Okay. Researcher Ortega: I'll do it. Researcher Ortega asks Breen to leave the bathroom and leans over the toilet to retrieve the sample. Researcher Ortega exits the bathroom at a brisk pace without the sample. Researcher Ortega: It looked at me. Researcher Breen: Alright. Let's just put the whole thing in the bag real quick. Researchers enter the bathroom again, Breen holding the sample bag and Ortega using tongs to place the object inside. Researcher Ortega disappears, the sound of water splashing is heard in the toilet. Breen sprints toward the door to SCP-1782 and exits the room. Series: Holy Science Related Tales: The Special Bond Between Child and Mother

SCP-2055 is a behavioural phenomenon that has been observed in █.

*** Item #: SCP-2055 Object Class: Keter Special Containment Procedures: Best practice in relation to SCP-2055 is currently limited to constant monitoring of key personnel and the suppression of public knowledge. All Class A and Class B personnel, as well as key civilian figures, should be subject to constant automated remote surveillance using approved protocol D-11 for intelligent remote monitoring systems. Recording and alarms should be triggered in response to observed individuals engaging in “chair-gathering”, talking to themselves, or otherwise displaying abnormal acute-onset behaviours. In the event of automated monitors being triggered, the nearest available security officers should be alerted and authorised to carry out immediate physical intervention. In cases where remote monitoring has allowed SCP-2055 to be interrupted, affected individuals have become highly agitated and resistant. As such, the use of restraints is approved in order to prevent affected personnel harming themselves or others. Once removed from the location of onset, abnormal behaviours cease, with the individual exhibiting no memory of preceding events. Affected personnel must nevertheless be debriefed, in order to identify any epidemiological pattern or predictors of onset. Where the process ends in the individual taking their own life, gathered chairs should be removed, in order to support the appearance of mundane suicide. Due to the difficulty in predicting the occurrence, prevalence or individual outcomes of SCP-2055, constant surveillance is currently the only certain counter-measure. Professor H███'s interviews with survivors of SCP-2055 and post-mortem examinations of fatalities have not yet identified any definitive aetiology or risk factors; as such, further investigation is essential. Observation is therefore a priority and it is necessary that observed occurrences in non-essential populations be allowed to continue to completion in order to further knowledge of this phenomenon. Description: SCP-2055 is a behavioural phenomenon that has been observed in █.█% of the global population. Estimating the precise number of cases is difficult as survivors of SCP-2055 retain no memory of the phenomenon, and it is likely that the majority of SCP-2055 fatalities have been miscategorised as conventional suicides due to the similarity in presentation. SCP-2055 fatalities are distinguished only by the behaviours preceding death: affected individuals will, whilst alone, suddenly begin gathering any available nearby chairs and placing them in a row. Affected individuals have then been observed to talk to themselves for anywhere between a few minutes and twelve hours, moving around the room and appearing to address the empty chairs. In 94.3% of observed cases, the individual ultimately discontinued this behaviour and resumed previous activities without any apparent memory of the occurrence. However, in 5.7% of cases the individual ended the behaviour in suicide — most commonly through the application of a ligature to the neck, although exsanguination and self-poisoning have also been observed. Due to the lack of awareness of their own behaviour exhibited by survivors, the only means of investigating SCP-2055 has been through random surveillance of the general population via █████ █████. The first case was observed ██/██/1994 and, since the inclusion of ████ ██████ in commercial ███████ after ██████, it has become possible to remotely observe increasing numbers of cases. No abnormalities have been identified by either psychological examination of individuals who have survived this phenomenon or post-mortem examination of those who have not. However, remote recording of the phenomenon taking place has generated potentially useful insights into the nature of SCP-2055. Analysis of recordings initially identified a resemblance between the behaviour of affected individuals and the behaviour of a defendant standing trial. However, legal experts who have reviewed recordings of affected individuals have suggested that the process more closely resembles the legal practice of voir dire: the preliminary examination of prospective jurors to determine their suitability to serve on a jury. Addendum: Transcriptions of remote SCP-2055 recordings gathered covertly via █████ █████: Transcript SCP-2055-1207 [Subject 1207 is alone in his home eating an evening meal at onset of phenomenon. Subject 1207 rises from his place and silently arranges four dining room chairs in a row against one wall. Subject then appears to listen intently.] Subject 1207: Yes, yes I am. [110s silence] Subject 1207: I understand. [27s silence] Subject 1207: I swear I will speak the truth. [8s silence] Subject 1207: I accept the consequences. [6s silence] Subject 1207: Sorry, I'm not sure I understand the question, could you repeat it? [4s silence] Subject 1207: Oh, right. That's a hard one. I would say that we are the highest form of life. We are God's children. [5s silence] Subject 1207: Capable of thought, compassion, love. We have consciousness. [8s silence] Subject 1207: No. No one. [2s silence] Subject 1207: I'm sure of it. No one. I mean, no one in the way you're suggesting. [286s silence] Subject 1207: It wasn't like that. It was just a casual fling. I feel nothing for her now. I may have felt that way at the time but feelings change. It isn't fair to say that. I don't think you're being fair to me. [13s silence] Subject 1207: That was just a dream, it doesn't mean anything. Do you dream? Do you remember what it's like? They don't necessarily mean anything. [4s silence] Subject 1207: Even if I still had those feelings, I can put them aside. I want to put them aside. I'm a very fair-minded person, really, I can be impartial. Look, I don't see why you're dragging my personal life into this. Everyone has a personal life, if being human means my judgement can't be trusted then what's the point? [5s silence] Subject 1207: Of course I can, listen, you need me. I understand people. [3s silence] Subject 1207: No. [6s silence] Subject 1207: I can be, I swear I can be. [7s silence] Subject 1207: I do! [4s silence] Subject 1207: I want to help. [4s silence] Subject 1207: [Visibly frustrated] No, you're twisting my words. I just want to help you reach the right decision. Should caring about people disqualify me? Did none of you care about people when you had the chance? [16s silence] Subject 1207: Look, I understand what's involved! I just want to help. I must help. [6s silence] Subject 1207: Please. [Beginning to weep] Give me a chance. [7s silence] Subject 1207: Please let me help. [Subject 1207 suddenly ceases crying and calmly replaces the dining room chairs, then sits at the table and resumes eating dinner. In interviews following this incident, the subject exhibited no memory of SCP-2055 or of his own anomalous behaviour.] Transcript SCP-2055-1809 [Subject 1809 is alone in a private office at onset of phenomenon. Subject 1809 rises from his desk and arranges five office chairs in a row against one wall before pausing and apparently listening intently.] Subject 1809: Yes. [110s silence] Subject 1809: I do. [27s silence] Subject 1809: I swear I will speak the truth. [8s silence] Subject 1809: I will. [7s silence] Subject 1809: A kind of animal, I suppose. [5s silence] Subject 1809: Different in some ways, not in others. [6s silence] Subject 1809: Nothing specific, I guess I've never given it any thought. People are ultimately animals. We're all just clever monkeys, aren't we? [8s silence] Subject 1809: Yes, many and badly. [6s silence] Subject 1809: Of course I do, but it is what it is. As my ma used to say, there's no point crying over spilled milk. [7s silence] Subject 1809: We wanted different things. [13s silence] Subject 1809: I think I see people as they are. I'm gonna be sixty next year, I think I've reached the point where I know what's what. [18s silence] Subject 1809: What will be will be. If not me then someone else, right? [20s silence] Subject 1809: I'd say I'm pretty typical. We all want the same things, don't we? [4s silence] Subject 1809: It's like… what's his name? Maslow? The guy with the triangle? [2s silence] Subject 1809: Yeah, him. His triangle thing says we all want food, sex, warmth, safety. Not necessarily in that order. I'm a realist, I appreciate that there's good and bad in all of us, that you need certain comforts to have the luxury of morality. Sometimes it is kill or be killed and when it comes down to it, a starving man is much the same as a starving dog. [16s silence] Subject 1809: I don't know. I guess I've thought about it too much. We can never really know, can we, but I've tried to live my life right without worrying too much about what I can't change. I've never really been what you'd call a believer, but here I am talking to you, so I guess all things are possible, right? [8s silence] Subject 1809: Ah, good question. I'd say Hollywood, the way it used to be… or Paris, Paris is nice. [5s silence] Subject 1809: I dunno… the Holocaust, I guess? [8s silence] Subject 1809: I can't possibly know is the simple answer to that, but we all find out in time. [5s silence] Subject 1809: Honesty. [6s silence] Subject 1809: Self-delusion. [5s silence] Subject 1809: [Laughing] I'll take that as a compliment! [37s silence] Subject 1809: Yes, I understand. I am willing. [44s silence] Subject 1809: Thank you, it's been a pleasure and I'll do my best to justify your confidence. So I guess I do it now, then? Here goes… [Subject 1809 then removes his belt and smilingly tightens it around his neck. Post-mortem examination confirmed death by hypoxia.]

SCP-1045 is a square wood-framed candle lantern measuring 15cm x 15cm x 32cm.

*** Item #: SCP-1045 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-1045 is stored in Low-Security Locker 17 at Site 21. No flammable materials or sources of open flame are to be brought within 5 meters of SCP-1045 except for testing purposes. Description: SCP-1045 is a square wood-framed candle lantern measuring 15 cm x 15 cm x 32 cm. Its sides are made of translucent waxed paper and its interior framework provides a nested support for a circular glass cup measuring 6.5 cm in diameter and 10 cm in height. The anomalous properties of SCP-1045 do not manifest unless both components are used together. When a candle is placed within SCP-1045 and lit, the walls of SCP-1045 depict the shadow of a miniature humanoid, as if lit from behind by the candle. The shadow on each side of the lantern depicts a different angle of the same subject. The shadow of the humanoid is always writhing, as if in pain, and it is surrounded by what appear to be semi-opaque flames. The shadow of the figure will persist as long as the candle is burning. Its motions become more frantic as the candle comes closer to burning out. All candle residue recovered from SCP-1045 consists of rendered human fat, regardless of the original makeup of the candle. Damaged DNA samples have been recovered, but the identity of the source individual(s) has yet to be determined. Addendum: Testing has revealed that burning scented candles produces shadows of different figures. In addition, burning a scented candle allows the shadows to emit sound. The volume of the sound is dependent on the strength of the scent. To date, all shadows have only produced incoherent screams.

SCP-1985 is a female human of African-American origin, named Jacqueline Johnson.

*** Item #: SCP-1985 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: SCP-1985 is contained at Sub-Site-███, and is to be kept in good condition and health. Ongoing research on SCP-1985-A is mandatory. If SCP-1985 is judged to become a significant security risk due to exposure to another anomalous entity, device error, or any other reason, Protocol 1985-Adahn will be enacted. Protocol 1985-Adahn is classified Level 4 and will be automatically disseminated to all personnel involved with SCP-1985 in case of containment breach. Mobile Task Force Omicron-1985 is responsible for retrieving SCP-1985 upon its return from an excursion. Deployment of mass amnestics is pre-approved if SCP-1985's return is witnessed by multiple members of the civilian populace. SCP-1985 has been implanted with a tracking device and is currently allowed Class 1 (full/non-restricted) free-roaming and socialization privileges with approved site personnel, granted based on continued good behavior. Per Class 1 protocols, SCP-1985 is not allowed to enter non-approved areas of Sub-Site-███ (or any applicable facility), and not allowed outside its containment area without being accompanied by approved personnel (except upon temporary involuntary relocation). Approved personnel may interact with SCP-1985 under protocol guidelines, and may refer to SCP-1985 by its first name. Approval of personnel for Class 1 interaction with SCP-1985 is currently handled by Dr. Glass. SCP-1985's containment chamber currently includes a computer with an Internet connection. All data sent to an outside network by SCP-1985 is managed by monitoring personnel. No real-time access is allowed. See Containment Protocol R-Zenith-13. During excursions, SCP-1985 is to have assigned equipment on its person at all times. All retrieved items are to be secured as soon as possible once an excursion ends. Description: SCP-1985 is a female human of African-American origin, named Jacqueline Johnson. SCP-1985-A is a trans-universal teleportation device implanted in SCP-1985's body, including millions of ultra-thin components in its brain and spinal cord, and several large components located in its thorax and abdomen. Anomalous qualities of both SCP-1985 and SCP-1985-A appear to have been based on qualities of multiple other SCP items. When SCP-1985 dies, SCP-1985-A is activated. Upon activation, SCP-1985-A transports SCP-1985 to what appears to be a parallel reality. This parallel reality will usually (approx. 95% rate) be undergoing a K-Class scenario somewhat consistent with the Jackson K-Class Classification System. The 5% deviation is thought to result from utilization of a slightly different K-Class classification system than in use by any currently extant Foundation branches.1 The destination reality that SCP-1985 is transported to cannot be perfectly controlled, but certain realities and types of scenarios can be targeted by "priming" SCP-1985. SCP-1985 is primed by exposure to materials related to the goal topic in the period shortly before initiation of an excursion. + Further Documentation on Priming - Close Document Priming Process: Priming of SCP-1985 has a base success rate of approximately 70%. Priming success rate can be increased by emotionally agitating SCP-1985. Exposure to material (such as documents or audiovisual records) related to the priming target can result in a priming success rate as high as 93%. SCP-1985 may be primed to travel to a reality to which it has previously traveled. SCP-1985 will arrive in that reality significantly before or significantly after any time which it had previously spent there. Attempts to induce SCP-1985 to enter a reality during a time frame in which it is already present have been unsuccessful. - Close Document Any items or persons that SCP-1985 is in contact with (and specifically desires to transport) are transported with it. SCP-1985 cannot transport any material except what it is wearing if unconscious for more than 5 minutes prior to death. SCP-1985 can similarly transport objects when returning. Two-way communication is possible with SCP-1985 during an excursion; signals may be sent and received as if all equipment was located in the same reality. Signals are apparently shielded from carrying anomalous effects. SCP-1985 arrives in the alternate reality in a random location close to the surface of Earth's crust. This location may be of any nature, whether underwater, underground, or mid-atmosphere. For this reason (and others), transportation of personnel with SCP-1985 is inadvisable. SCP-1985 is returned to life in a significantly altered physical state. In SCP-1985's altered state, it is highly resistant to all forms of physical injury, as well as many anomalous effects. It gains significantly enhanced physical ability and sensory perception. It is able to survive without food, water, and oxygen for a prolonged period of time (variant based on unknown factors). Components of SCP-1985-A extrude from its body, notably fine metallic threads covering the surface of its skin. SCP-1985-A will return SCP-1985 from its excursion once one of the following conditions are fulfilled: SCP-1985 dies. SCP-1985 does not die, but is subject to completely crippling damage, or a loss of more than 10% of its body mass. 6 (six) months have passed. SCP-1985 claims that this six-month time period is a "default setting" that can be altered with proper devices, and that it can stay in the destination reality for several years before running out of power. SCP-1985 is returned alive and free of physical injury, in its baseline physical state. Usually, SCP-1985 will return to a random location not inimical to survival (in contrast to excursion initiation). SCP-1985 will always undergo an automatic "scheduled" excursion event if 30 days pass with no triggered excursions occurring. Mechanism for cause of death in this case is unclear; all its bodily functions cease to operate simultaneously. SCP-1985 claims the 1-month time period may also be altered with control devices. Foundation researchers have been able to interface with SCP-1985-A. Information recovery is ongoing. Efforts to reconstruct SCP-1985-A control devices are currently underway. SCP-1985 was discovered on ██/██/████ in [REDACTED] Los Angeles, California, two days after it was witnessed by locals "appearing out of thin air". SCP-1985 evaded the witnesses and checked itself into a local hospital. SCP-1985 expressed confusion at the delay in recovery once Foundation personnel arrived. According to SCP-1985, the Foundation implanted it with SCP-1985-A and had been sending it on regular excursions, until contact was unexpectedly dropped during its last trip. SCP-1985 appears to have been designed by the Foundation in an alternate reality or [REDACTED] under a program referred to as Project Rhodes. All anomalous traits of SCP-1985 appear to have been derived from anomalous objects contained by the Foundation. SCP-1985 was one of thirty-seven other "successful" products of Project Rhodes (which also produced five hundred and ninety-three "unsuccessful" products), and is referred to as "K-Class Scenario Research Device R-21". See SCP-1985 Recovered Information. [DATA EXPUNGED] No other "successful" products of Project Rhodes have yet been discovered. SCP-1985 displays the following notable physical traits: History of clinical depression, anorexia nervosa, cancer, and alcoholism. Extensive scar tissue present throughout its body, both internally and externally (particularly around the spine and back of head). Drastically slowed aging process. Pre-recovery use of amnestics has made actual age difficult to discern. Appears to be in late twenties. Possible protection from some restructuring events. [Level 3 Access Granted] SCP-1985 has a duplicate living in [REDACTED]. Duplicate is identical to SCP-1985 except lacking anomalous attributes. Protocol 1985-Adahn: [DATA EXPUNGED] + Level 4 Clearance Required. - Close Document Protocol 1985-Adahn, also known as the "Kill Switch" protocol, is the last-resort protocol to be used if SCP-1985 is involved in or constitutes a serious breach. Protocol 1985-Adahn, when enacted, "deactivates" SCP-1985 by temporarily shutting down all mental activity. There are three major downsides to Protocol 1985-Adahn: SCP-1985's mental activity cannot be restored for a period of 1 (one) week. This appears to be another "default setting", which the Foundation does not currently have means to alter. Recovered information indicates that if SCP-1985 dies while deactivated, death will be permanent. This method was used by SCP-1985's creators to kill malfunctioning products of Project Rhodes. During previous uses of Protocol 1985-Adahn, SCP-1985 incurred temporary brain damage and several times nearly incurred permanent brain death while deactivated. - Close Document Excursions: Individuals with appropriate clearance level may access further details of SCP-1985's excursions in Disseminated Documentation 1985-Alpha. Addendum: Per request: A representative example of a lowered priming success rate is Excursion 289-0AJ-PO5, in which SCP-1985 was primed with information about [REDACTED], and agitated via references to SCP-1985's homosexuality and religious background. This resulted in SCP-1985 traveling to a reality in which a Christianity-based cult had exterminated all non-heterosexual humans via anomalous means. I've attached a file listing similar results. This is why we don't recommend agitating SCP-1985 outside of guidelines. At best, you'll end up with a lowered success rate. - Dr. ███████ Addendum: SCP-1985 has been able to access the following K-Class scenarios (following the Jackson K-Class Classification System): XK-class Type Alpha (scorched earth) end of the world scenarios XK-class Type Omega (religious) end of the world scenarios CK-class restructuring scenarios AK-class "madness" end of the world scenarios EK-class "consciousness-loss" end of the world scenarios NK-class "grey goo" end of the world scenarios RK-class "out-competition" restructuring scenarios SK-class dominance shift scenarios IK-class collapse of global civilization scenarios [REMAINDER CLASSIFIED] Addendum: On 05/19/████, SCP-1985 submitted a single request for administration of Class-N targeted amnestics. Request was denied. Update: Personnel with Level 4 clearance may refer to Excursion XJU-034-IQ1 for further information on SCP-1985's nature. + Level 4 Clearance Required. - Level 4 Access Granted Excursion XJU-034-IQ1 Priming: SCP-1985's own, personal origins (success) Trigger: Standard lethal injection Equipment: Standard Reality Description: SCP-1985 did not travel to another reality, but immediately transformed to its altered form without any teleportation occurring. Retrieval: SCP-1985 reverted to its base form after six months of study without any teleportation occurring. Notes: This is the only time SCP-1985 has been transported to the same reality it was sent from, and appears to confirm that SCP-1985 originates from this reality. Full implications are unknown. The strongest possibility is currently thought to involve a CK-class restructuring event taking place in our reality that did not affect SCP-1985. Regardless, the fact that SCP-1985 was able to "travel" to this reality at all indicates that some form of K-Class scenario is in progress here. Further information is currently classified Level 5. Footnotes 1. Tilda David Moose, "Meta-Study on Established K-Class Scenario Systems Utilized Within Foundation Archives" Eschaton: An SCP Foundation Journal (2013): 165

SCP-6018 is a cassette-player with a cassette tape inside, containing the song "Born This Way" by Lady Gaga.

*** Item #: SCP-6018 Object Class: Safe CONTENT WARNING: Miscarriage and birth-related trauma. Special Containment Procedures: SCP-6018 is to be contained in a secure item storage locker when not in use for testing. Personnel may request personal use of SCP-6018. Doing so requires permission from twenty-five different staff members, at least five of which must never have clearance level 3/6018 or higher. Tests may no longer be conducted with pregnant women in the effective range of SCP-6018 without clearance from a member of the O5 council. These tests may only be conducted with vetted Foundation personnel with clearance level 4/6018 or higher as the test subject. Description: SCP-6018 is a cassette-player with a cassette tape inside, containing the song "Born This Way" by Lady Gaga. To date, all attempts to disassemble SCP-6018 and examine its inner workings have been unsuccessful. SCP-6018 displays its anomalous properties when being played in its entirety and rewound to the beginning of the tape by a single individual. When operated in this manner, SCP-6018 will transfer the consciousness of the individual who played and rewound it into a new, living body. SCP-6018 will always select the youngest living human within 100 meters as the target vessel. The vessel that the user leaves enters a comatose state and dies if left unattended. No evidence of the previous consciousness of the target vessel has yet been observed, and, at this time, the consciousnesses lost this way are presumed dead. SCP-6018-1 is an extradimensional anomaly that can be accessed by utilizing SCP-6018 in the vicinity of a pregnant woman. Addendum 6018-1: On 13/09/2014, a sixty year old Foundation staff member named Dr. Neptune volunteered for experiment 6018-37. In this experiment, the test subject was to have their consciousness transferred to the unborn child of a pregnant D-class. Years after this experiment succeeded, the following interviews were conducted. They occurred on 04/01/2017, soon after Dr. Neptune regained the ability to speak. As a result of his testimony, the secure containment procedures were updated on 06/01/2017 to restrict further testing on pregnant women. Interview Log 6018-A: Open Audio Log Close Audio Log <Begin Audio Log> Interviewer: Junior Researcher Flemming Interviewee: Dr. Neptune Junior Researcher Flemming: So I understand that you have recently regained the ability to speak? Congratulations, Dr. Neptune. I imagine these past few years have been frustrating for you. Dr. Neptune: Yeth, although I unfortunately thtill have a lithp, and yeth, you have no idea how fruthtrating it is being a baby again, but I would rather not dwell on that at the moment. Note: [For the sake of clarity, Dr. Neptune's lisp will be ignored for the remainder of the transcription. Words impacted by the lisp will be written as normal.] Junior Researcher Flemming: Right, I can scarcely imagine that situation. As I understand it, you requested this interview because you had something vital to share about your experiences, is that correct? Dr. Neptune: Yes, you see when I had finished using SCP-6018 and vacated my previous body, I lost consciousness. Junior Researcher Flemming: Isn't it normal to be unconscious while one is developing in their mother's womb? Dr. Neptune: I presume so, but it did not feel like I was falling unconscious. Instead, it felt as if I was waking up somewhere else. Junior Researcher Flemming: Somewhere else? What was it like? (Silence ensues for approximately 16 seconds as Dr. Neptune collects his thoughts.) Dr. Neptune: When I first awoke, I was at the end of a long line of people, similar to what you would find at an amusement park, except everyone was facing towards me, and they were not exactly people… in the traditional sense of the word at least. Junior Researcher Flemming: Could you elaborate? Dr. Neptune: Yes, I intend to. Be patient, kid. Dr. Neptune: As I was saying, they were not really people, but they somewhat were. I suppose you could call them souls for simplicity. That is what I thought of them as while I was there. They have human heads with their facial features in seemingly random placements on them; usually nowhere close to making a normal human face. They also all had between two to four limbs attached at random locations on their head. These limbs varied between all sorts of animals, from human limbs to crab claws, to lion tails. They moved in strange and unique ways, befitting their unique anatomies. Junior Researcher Flemming: Were you in a similar form? Dr. Neptune: Oddly enough, no. I was in a form very similar to my former body, yet smaller. I was about the size of a child. If these "souls", as I will refer to them, had accurate adult human proportions, then I believe I was about one meter tall, but that is of little importance. Dr. Neptune: As I said before, I was at the end of a long queue of sorts, with everyone facing me. Naturally, I turned around to see what they were all facing, and it was a large doorway filled with a solid, white glow. It was so opaque that I could not see anything past it. Once I took in the sight, I got out of the line so that the others could pass by. Sure enough, as soon as I left, the line started moving, with each soul walking uniformly into the light. It was only then I realized that this was a large gate with the soul creatures exiting out the other side. Dr. Neptune: After observing this for a few more minutes, I confirmed that nothing of particular interest was happening to these creatures inside the gate, nothing that I could observe at least. Weeks later, I tried to pass through the gate, but I found myself unable to move through the light like the others had. Dr. Neptune: After I took that in and got over my initial shock, I began to explore the area. I found that it seemed to go on forever, as if looking across large empty plains. There was nothing large in the distance to impede my view, and it seemed to extend forever. The sky and ground, however, were unnatural. They were both uniform, without any patterns or blemishes to speak of, and entirely baby blue in color. Junior Researcher Flemming: Were there any notable features besides these "souls" and the line to the gate? Dr. Neptune: Yes, there were plenty of strange objects at random locations to break up the otherwise monotonous world. I found plenty of tables with strange chairs that the soul creatures would sit at for long periods of time. <End Audio Log> After this point in the interview, Dr. Neptune began to mumble, repeat himself, and become visibly drowsy, according to Junior Researcher Flemming. Within ten minutes, the caretaker in charge of Dr. Neptune collected him for his regularly scheduled nap time. The interview resumes two hours later. Interview Log 6018-B: Open Audio Log Close Audio Log <Begin Audio Log> Interviewer: Junior Researcher Flemming Interviewee: Dr. Neptune Junior Researcher Flemming: Hello again, Dr. Neptune. How was your nap? (Dr. Neptune responds with an aggressive tone.) Dr. Neptune: It served its purpose. Now, where were we? Junior Researcher Flemming: I believe we were discussing the other features of the world you were inhabiting. Dr. Neptune: Ah, yes. As I was saying, the "souls" were seated at tables around the space for long stretches, from hours to what felt like days. Junior Researcher Flemming: What were they doing there? Dr. Neptune: They were engaged in various games. Backgammon, card games, dice games, and plenty more that I still do not recognize. They were also betting strange tokens on these games, even when they were not participating in the games themselves. Junior Researcher Flemming: What were these tokens like? Dr. Neptune: They were simple coin-shaped tokens; they were marked with an uncountable number of symbols. There were numbers, letters, constellations, planets, animals, and many more depictions that were unfamiliar to me. Regardless, I later found that these tokens were all of equal value, even those with numbered markings. Junior Researcher Flemming: Did the iconography seem connected across coins at least? Dr. Neptune: Not that I could tell. I believe that many of the tokens depicted images outside of human language and history. I never saw two tokens that were exactly alike." Junior Researcher Flemming: Interesting. And you said they were gambling with them? How could you tell? Dr. Neptune: They were not using language if that is what you are asking. It seemed instinctual for them. They would simply walk up to a table, expel a number of tokens from their mouth or similar orifice, and place them on the table for ante. Whoever won took every token bet by the players for that game. Everyone else betting on the game made brief gestures amongst themselves and traded tokens with each other after the outcome. Junior Researcher Flemming: Did you recognize the type of sign language they used? Dr. Neptune: No, it was not quite sign language. There was no consistency to these gestures between individuals. At first I thought I was missing something, but then one of them spoke to me after I spent a few hours observing one of the tables. Junior Researcher Flemming: Spoke you say? Dr. Neptune: Not speaking in the traditional sense. The creature gesticulated towards me after it approached, and, shortly after it finished, I subconsciously understood what it was trying to convey. Junior Researcher Flemming: Did it communicate using telepathy? Dr. Neptune: No, telepathy implies interfacing from mind to mind. This felt much more like what they were trying to communicate was being translated for me in my mind. It felt like the world itself was translating this creature for me. After this experience and a little practice, I was able to understand any creature in this realm if I focused on them while they were gesturing. Junior Researcher Flemming: You were able to communicate with them then? Dr. Neptune: To some degree, yes. While I could speak to these creatures, they did not necessarily understand what I was saying. They did not seem to have advanced enough intellects to do anything besides communicate about gambling. The most evidence of intelligence I ever witnessed in that world was object permanence. Junior Researcher Flemming: Interesting. If you were able to understand them, then were you eventually able to make sense of the coins? Dr. Neptune: I already told you that was not the case. The images on the tokens appeared to be superfluous. There was no real meaning in them besides decoration. Junior Researcher Flemming: Then did the tokens themselves have a purpose? Dr. Neptune: Yes, I was getting there. There were more than just tables in this space. There were also strange devices akin to vending machines. Junior Researcher Flemming: Vending machines? Is that how you and these creatures subsisted? Dr. Neptune: What? No, there was no need to eat, drink, or do anything else for survival there. Junior Researcher Flemming: Then what were the vending machines for? Dr. Neptune: They dispensed pieces of paper similar to receipts that changed in quality depending how many tokens you put in the machine. Junior Researcher Flemming: Quality you say? Dr. Neptune: Yes, each machine was labelled in a strange language. The labels said things like wealth, family, personality, fame, skills, death, and plenty more such categories. Junior Researcher Flemming: And what was the purpose of these receipts? Dr. Neptune: I am not entirely certain. All I know for sure is that creatures would exchange tokens for them and eat them. Usually, this would only occur once a creature had stopped playing at tables, and, after exchanging all of their tokens for receipts, they would enter the queue to the gate. Junior Researcher Flemming: The one that you were next to when you first entered SCP-6018-1? Dr. Neptune: The very same, yes. Junior Researcher Flemming: I see, and how did you leave that place? Dr. Neptune: I did not leave. I tried to on several occasions. I attempted travelling through the gate multiple times, from both directions. I tried walking in one direction for long stretches of time, but to no avail. One day, I just felt my body slowly disappear, and, eventually, I realized I had become a baby again. After that, I patiently waited until I could act at least somewhat autonomously, and, well, here we are. Junior Researcher Flemming: I see. Is there anything else you want to say before we conclude the interview? Dr. Neptune: Yes. I must admit. I still understand very little about that world, yet I cannot help but feel it is very important. I highly recommend that the Foundation continue to research it extensively. <End Audio Log> Addendum-6018-2: On 16/01/2017, Operation Mimir officially began, and twelve separate agents were sent into SCP-6018-1 for further investigations. Of the twelve agents who were sent, only six returned. The other agents were lost to pregnancy complications. On 18/02/2019, interviews about the agents' experiences began to be conducted. Because of their testimonies, Dr. Neptune's descriptions of his discoveries were verified. According to the agents, the "receipts" that Dr. Neptune described in his interviews were obtained and ingested by half of the field agents in the operation. Each of the agents who did so is as follows: Display Data Conceal Data Agent Name SCP-6018-1 Activity Additional Notes Agent Bravo - Seymour Reynolds Agent Bravo exchanged 35 tokens at a device labelled "Regrets". The text on the receipt read as follows: "You will lose the one true love of your life to one bad night. This voucher can be redeemed for 165 tokens." Agent Bravo stored the receipt by consuming it, as other residents of SCP-6018-1 did, but was unable to redeem it for tokens. Agent Bravo began gagging and coughing soon after and continued to do so for several hours. Agent Bravo reported having no regrets of any kind in his previous life to the other Agents upon receiving his receipt. Agent Bravo's new vessel was stillborn, preventing him from testifying on his own behalf. Agent Charlie - James Everdeen Agent Charlie attempted to insert 300 tokens at a device labelled "Death". However, he only succeeded in exchanging 200 tokens before receiving a receipt with the following text: "You will die at the age of 52." Agent Charlie was reluctant to consume the receipt but did so after being ordered to by Agent Alpha. Later in the operation, Agent Charlie was caught removing the receipt from his person and disposing of it. After being caught, Agent Charlie refused to consume the receipt again. This aversion may have been related to Agent Charlie being 54 years old before joining Operation Mimir. Agent Charlie was lost to a miscarriage before he could return from SCP-6018-1. Agent Echo - Silvia Ruiz Agent Echo exchanged one token at a device labelled "Family". The resulting receipt said, "You will be the oldest child in a family of 20 and be expected to care for your younger siblings." Agent Echo consumed the receipt, as ordered, but had considerable difficulty swallowing it. It took her several hours to complete the task. Notably, Agent Echo was an only child in her previous life. Agent Echo died in a containment breach while her new vessel's mother was still pregnant with her. The mother in question survived. Agent Foxtrot - Dominique DeRose Agent Foxtrot exchanged 200 tokens at a device labelled "skills". The receipt from said exchange read as follows: "You will be blessed with great athletic capabilities with a particular aptitude for marksmanship." Agent Foxtrot swallowed the receipt without any significant difficulties or adverse side-effects. Agent Foxtrot was an MTF agent during her time at the Foundation who regularly scored highly on marksmanship exercises. Agent Juliet - Muhammed Faraj Agent Juliet exchanged 50 tokens at the device labelled "Personality". He received a receipt with the following text: "You will be a mildly introverted soul with a cold exterior." Agent Juliet consumed the receipt, despite finding it incredibly hot to the touch. This phenomenon was not reported when other Foundation agents examined the receipt. After consuming the receipt, Agent Juliet reported feeling mildly feverish, which continued for the remainder of his time in SCP-6018-1. It should be noted that Agent Juliet was extroverted and popular among his peers during his time at the Foundation. Agent Juliet died when his new vessel's mother had to undergo surgery during childbirth. Agent Kilo - Tyrone Green Agent Kilo exchanged 20 tokens at a device labelled "Wealth" and received a receipt labelled with the following text: "You will have an average income of $25,000 throughout your career and be unable to retire." Agent Kilo consumed the receipt without issue, but began to glow green and experience nausea after an hour had passed. These symptoms were present for the remainder of his stay within SCP-6018-1. According to Foundation records, Agent Kilo had a considerably higher salary while employed with the Foundation for the last 30 years. Additional Findings: Despite the adverse side-effects Foundation Agents received when consuming the receipts, no such reaction was reported in any resident of SCP-6018-1. Residents of SCP-6018-1 tended to disappear in a similar manner as Foundation staff did upon leaving SCP-6018-1; this event always coincided with the resident in question watching gambling games for several consecutive days without betting. Of the Foundation Staff who returned, some reported side-effects. Agent Hotel was born deaf in his left ear, which was also the case in his previous life. Foundation researchers have yet to discover a plausible medical explanation for this. The genetics of Agent Hotel's new vessel had no notable predisposition to this and no major incident occurred to Agent Hotel while his new vessel was developing. Agent Kilo was also born with a new birth defect, arrhythmia due to a congenital defect, which he did not have in his previous life. Because of this, he died four months after being born again and the remaining payments promised to him were transferred to living relatives. Signs of this birth defect did not appear until shortly before Agent Kilo was born into his new vessel. Agent Foxtrot was also born with a minor birth defect, a cleft palate. Similar to Agent Kilo, there was no sign of this birth defect in her previous life or in her prenatal development. Addendum 6018-3: On 20/02/2020, phase two of Operation Mimir was launched. Over the course of six months, SCP-6018 was utilized to send 200 Foundation agents to SCP-6018-1 in order to attempt to contain it. Results are pending. As of 23/06/2021, only three Foundation agents sent by phase two have successfully returned from SCP-6018-1. Phase three of Operation Mimir is in the process of being organized while we await the testimonies of the surviving agents. If you have recommendations for participants in or wish to volunteer for Operation Mimir, then please contact Dr. Neptune. Currently, only twelve of the two hundred agents required to assert control over SCP-6018-1 have been recruited. Security clearance requirements have been temporarily reduced in order to meet the recruitment quota.

SCP-6827 is a cognitohazardous entity which mainfests as a black furred Lar Gibbon1 wearing a blue cardboard cone on its head, with "สุขสันต์วันเกิด2" written on it in gold foil lettering.

*** Item#: 6827 Level1 Containment Class: esoteric Secondary Class: thaumiel Disruption Class: vlam Risk Class: notice link to memo Special Containment Procedures: Research into the manufacturing and low-scale re-production of SCP-6827-A is ongoing. Any Foundation staff may request an instance of SCP-6827-A be sent to any member of Foundation personnel, including D-Class and sentient anomalies contained by the Foundation. Dr. Andrea Synth, a member of the Ethics Committee and current project head of SCP-6827, is to review all requests for SCP-6827-A distribution. Description: SCP-6827 is a cognitohazardous entity which mainfests as a black furred Lar Gibbon1 wearing a blue cardboard cone on its head, with "สุขสันต์วันเกิด2" written on it in gold foil lettering. SCP-6827's only notable physical difference from non-anomalous Lar Gibbons is its arms, which are approximately two times the size of a baseline Gibbon's, however it exhibits a plethora of anomalous abilities which further separate it from its non-anomalous counterparts. SCP-6827 is intrinsically linked to SCP-6827-A, a series of cards produced by Hallmark Manufacturing Company, featuring a cartoon ape-like creature3 apparently called the "Happy Hug Monkey". The text on the cover of SCP-6827-A reads "THE HAPPY HUG MONKEY IS ON ITS WAY" with "DO NOT RESIST THE HAPPY HUG MONKEY" on the inside of the card. The card is from a series that is not anomalous in nature, and does not appear to have any physical differences to their non-anomalous counterparts. The Foundation has secured over 210 instances of SCP-6827-A. When any sentient individual reads SCP-6827-A, SCP-6827 will typically manifest within their line of sight. SCP-6827 will approach the individual at a speed of approximately 0.9 meters per second. SCP-6827 seems to have an innate sense of where the sentient individual is, and cannot be damaged or impeded by any known means, although it does appear to be affected by gravity. if the subject which views SCP-6827-A attempts to escape, SCP-6827-A is capable of de-manifesting and manifesting closer to its target when unobserved. Upon arriving at its target, SCP-6827 will wrap it arms around the effected individual, giving it a hug lasting anywhere from five seconds to six minutes. Those who interact with SCP-6827 have universally described the experience as pleasant. After this interaction, SCP-6827 will de-manifest, until another individual views an instance of SCP-6827-A. Addendum 6827.1: Discovery All known instances of SCP-6827-A were discovered within the Big C Supercenter located in Bangkok, Thailand, which had been shut down due to reports of a gibbon exhibiting unusual behavior. Local law enforcement was not equipped to handle, much less understand the situation, and the Foundation was quickly alerted to the incident. Foundation agents were sent in to handle the situation, and quickly determined SCP-6827-A to be the source of the anomaly. All 210 instances were confiscated and returned to site-108. Managers of the store reportedly had no recollection of ordering the cards, nor did store records indicate when and where the cards were obtained from. Hallmark Manufacturing Company was not distributing the series of cards within Thailand. Addendum 6827.2: Test Log SCP-6827 EXPERIMENT LOG TEST # DESCRIPTION RESULTS 6827-3 D-14335 and D-14336 are placed in adjacent cells, and both shown instances of SCP-6827-A. Test is to determine how SCP-6827 will react when two subjects view SCP-6827-A simultaneously. SCP-6827 appeared within D-14336's cell, and gave D-14336 a hug that lasted seven seconds. SCP-6827 then immediately de-manifested and re-manifested within D-14335's cell, and gave the Class-D subject a hug. Further testing confirms that SCP-6827 is incapable of being in two places at once. 6827-7 An agent in a large field observed an SCP-6827-A instance, and upon SCP-6827's appearance, immediately boarded a helicopter, all areas of which were being observed by Foundation staff. SCP-6827 was waiting for the helicopter at its designated landing spot. After the helicopter landed, SCP-6827 climbed aboard and gave the agent which had viewed SCP-6827 a hug lasting two minutes and forty-five seconds. Test suggests some level of sentience and problem-solving capabilities on the part of SCP-6827, however this is so far, unconfirmed. 6827-26 SCP-3355 views an instance of SCP-6827-A. SCP-6827 manifests within SCP-3355's containment chamber. It attempts to give SCP-3355 a hug, although its arms are not nearly long enough to wrap around the entirety of the computer. SCP-3355 expressed pleasure and gratitude towards Foundation staff after the interaction. Addendum 6827.3: Re-designation. To: O5 Council, Dr. Synth From: Dr. Finn Subject: SCP-6827 Esteemed members of the Containment Review Board, For the past six months, Dr. Synth and I have been running a small scale project in order to determine the efficacy of SCP-6827 in assisting with Foundation morale, and thus, Foundation containment methods. We have allowed staff to request the use of SCP-6827-A on any individual within Site-45, Site-72, and Site-108, including D-Class and sentient SCPs. This program has been an unequivocal success. The sites where this was implemented have seen an 82% increase in morale, and more importantly, a 37% increase in productivity. D-class cooperation in all sites was at an all time high within these sites, and many hostile SCPs showed a noted improvement in trust in and cooperation with Foundation personnel. I am formally requesting that SCP-6827 be unclassified to all Foundation staff, and re-designated as a Thaumiel level object. Future research into SCP-6827 should be focused on the reproduction of SCP-6827-A, as well as further uses of SCP-6827 as a way to improve current containment methods. I also strongly suggest that leadership of SCP-6827 be transferred to Dr. Synth, as I believe she will be able to produce the results we seek more effectively than myself. We are not monsters. Let's use this opportunity to remind everyone under our protection of that. Thank you for your consideration - Dr. David Finn CONTAINMENT COMMITTEE REVIEW BOARD - SCP-6827 LOG DATE SUBJECT VOTE 02/21/2021 SCP-6827 initial draft review (4) Accept (0) Deny 12/16/2021 SCP-6827 proposed re-designation to Thaumiel (7) Revise (1) Maintain Footnotes 1. Hylobates Lar 2. "Happy Birthday" in Thai 3. The depicted creature resembles a Chimpanzee rather than a Gibbon, and has a mainly purple coloration.

SCP-4278 is a small tropical island which appears and disappears in various locations across the globe.

*** Item #: SCP-4278 Object Class: Keter Special Containment Procedures: Due to the transient nature of SCP-4278, permanent physical containment is not possible. Upon evidence being received of an SCP-4278 manifestation, covert agents are to move to the manifestation site immediately and identify the first individual who witnessed SCP-4278. This individual is then to be brought into custody. Any other witnesses are to be administered amnestics and the area of the manifestation is to be sealed off from public use. When the first individual to witness SCP-4278 attempts to return to it, they are not to be prevented from doing so. Attempted containment in these cases has proven to be a waste of resources. (See Incident 4278-1.) A stretch of shore on SCP-4278. Image taken by exploration team. Description: SCP-4278 is a small tropical island which appears and disappears in various locations across the globe. In most cases, the area SCP-4278 appears in will be one with an extremely low human population; for this reason, it is believed most appearances of SCP-4278 go unreported. SCP-4278 will remain in a single location for a time ranging from three days to six months. Inspection of SCP-4278 by exploration teams indicates the presence of flora as would be expected for an island in the tropics, but no animal life of any kind has been found. In addition, exploration teams have reported a feeling of being watched which intensifies the closer they get to the center of the island. Despite full exploration of SCP-4278 taking place on several occasions, no source for this sensation has been identified, and it is currently unknown whether it is in fact an anomalous phenomenon or a mundane psychological reaction. The huts found at the center of SCP-4278. The only signs of human habitation on SCP-4278 are a series of six wooden huts of various materials and proportions in the center of the island. All six of these huts contain only single wooden tables, all of which appear to have marked by numerous sharp objects over a long period of time. Underneath these six huts are six mass graves, each of which contain bones, preserved organs and assorted viscera from an estimated two-hundred and sixty-four human beings1. The secondary anomalous effect of SCP-4278 occurs when it is first observed by a human being after manifestation. This human being, hereafter referred to as the victim, will then become convinced that they are going to be ritually murdered on SCP-4278 in the near future. Upon questioning, they will be able to provide specific and vivid details regarding their future murder, claiming that they are receiving the information as though they are remembering a memory that has not happened yet. Whether this is genuine premonition or memories implanted through exposure to SCP-4278 has not yet been confirmed. Immediately prior to SCP-4278 disappearing from its current location, the victim will make their way onto it, at which point both they and SCP-4278 will demanifest. Upon its next manifestation, new viscera will be present beneath one of the huts at the center of SCP-4278. Victims of SCP-4278 have invariably claimed they are not being anomalously compelled to return to SCP-4278, and are simply submitting to the inevitability of their future murder. All attempts to prevent a victim from returning to SCP-4278 have proven unsuccessful due to apparent coincidences that disable security measures, as well as an as-of-yet unexplained inability by bystanders to interfere with the victim as they make the journey to SCP-4278. Bar the victim, all foreign bodies introduced to SCP-4278 will be displaced into the surrounding area following demanifestation. For this reason, recording or otherwise monitoring of SCP-4278 following its disappearance is not possible. Interview Log 4278-1: On 12/09/2018, a manifestation of SCP-4278 was confirmed several kilometers from the small coastal town of Satsport, New England. The victim in this case was identified as local fifty-two year old fisherman Daniel Lawcroft, who was brought into custody at Temporary Site-52 shortly after. The following is the ensuing initial interview: <Begin Log> (Mr. Lawcroft is sitting at the table, his head in his hands. Dr. Santana enters, holding a cup of water.) Dr. Santana: You mentioned you were thirsty. Is this okay? (Pause.) Dr. Santana: Sir? (Mr. Lawcroft looks up, blinking rapidly, and takes the drink.) Mr. Lawcroft: Oh, uh, thanks. Dr. Santana: No problem. Something wrong? Mr. Lawcroft: I'm gonna die. (Pause.) Dr. Santana: We're going to do everything in our power to stop that from happening. Mr. Lawcroft: Doesn't matter. I can already remember it. (laughs) How the hell can I remember something that hasn't happened yet? Dr. Santana: I realize this may be challenging, but before we proceed I just need to get a little bit more information out of you. Could you take a look at these images? (Dr. Santana spreads several photographs over the table. Each is an image taken on SCP-4278 by initial exploration teams. After looking over them for a moment, Mr. Lawcroft points at an image of one of the huts at the center of SCP-4278 with a trembling finger.) Mr. Lawcroft: (quietly) That's it. Dr. Santana: That's what? Mr. Lawcroft: That's the house where they're going to cut me up. Dr. Santana: Who's going to cut you up? What do they look like? Mr. Lawcroft: I - I don't know. Just … people, I guess? With these white cloaks on, like bed-sheets, I won't be able to see their faces. They have these knives - um, they're sharp - very … very sharp. Dr. Santana: And when you say they cut you up … those are what they use? Mr. Lawcroft: They're going to open me up like - like a fish, all the way open. They're going to reach into me and p-pull parts out, and … and show them to me, right in my face, and then they're going to throw them on the floor. It's gonna hurt. It's gonna hurt so bad, but I don't die. Why don't I die? (beginning to hyperventilate) A-A-A-And then they - they're gonna start cutting me up from the toes into little, little pieces and I don't die! Don't - don't die! Why the fuck don't I die?! I didn't do anything wrong! I didn't do anything wrong! (Medical personnel enter the room and begin calming Mr. Lawcroft down over the course of thirty minutes.) Dr. Santana: Are you feeling better? Mr. Lawcroft: Mm…y-yeah … no, not really. I want… Dr. Santana: Yes? What can I do for you? Mr. Lawcroft: I really want my mama, doc. <End Log> Following this interview, a meeting between Mr. Lawton and his elderly mother was proposed by Dr. Santana, approved and conducted. Mr. Lawton reported a significant increase in morale as a result. Incident Log 4278-1: On 19/12/2018, Mr. Lawton began making his way to SCP-4278 as part of its demanifestation. The following is a log of the efforts that were taken to halt his advance towards SCP-4278. Time Events 01:10 An unexpected systems failure causes the doors to Mr. Lawton's quarters to automatically open. Mr. Lawton begins making his way out of Temporary Site-52. 01:11 Security personnel on-site attempt to apprehend and restrain Mr. Lawton, but report an inability to do so. When questioned further, they are unable to explain the exact reason they are unable to do this, simply stating they could not bring themselves to perform any actions that would require contact with Mr. Lawton. 01:16 Security personnel instructed to non-lethally fire upon Mr. Lawton. All guns jam when security personnel attempt to fire. Mr. Lawton reaches the main doors of Temporary Site-52. 01:18 A second systems failure causes the main doors of Temporary Site-52 to open. As Mr. Lawton leaves, personnel report that he is crying profusely. 01:19 Mr. Lawton begins walking towards the town of Satsport. Security personnel are ordered to switch to observation rather than attempt to restrain him. 02:43 Mr. Lawton reaches the town of Satsport. Plainclothes personnel take over observation duties and attempt to convince Mr. Lawton to cease his approach, but he refuses. 03:11 Mr. Lawton commandeers a motorboat, which personnel find themselves unable to get into, and proceeds towards SCP-4278. 03:54 Under orders from Dr. Santana, snipers positioned over the coast take aim and fire in Mr. Lawton's direction. Although they are unable to fire any shots that would hit Mr. Lawton, they successfully fire upon and disable his vehicle some distance away from SCP-4278. 03:55 Using a remote drone, Dr. Santana attempts to convince Mr. Lawton to return to Temporary Site-52. (See Interview Log 4278-2.) Interview Log 4278-2: <Begin Log> Dr. Santana: Daniel, please, please return to your quarters. We can still help you! Mr. Lawcroft: You can't, doc. You really can't. I appreciate this, though, I really do. (Pause.) Dr. Santana: If what you've said is true, Daniel, they're going to kill you on that island. Mr. Lawcroft: Yep. Dr. Santana: Then why would you want to go there now?! Mr. Lawcroft: Don't wanna do anything, doc. Wanna go home and watch some TV, pet my dog, fall asleep on the couch. But they're already cutting me up. They're already going to cut me up. Doesn't matter what I want. (Pause.) Dr. Santana: That boat isn't going anywhere, Daniel, and the waters are bad this time of year. You won't make it to the island either way. Mr. Lawcroft: (sighs) Wish it were true, doc, but neither of us've got a choice in the matter. Watch. <End Log> Time Events 03:58 Mr. Lawton begins to walk across the surface of the water. 04:22 Mr. Lawton reaches the coast of SCP-4278 and collapses into the fetal position, shaking. Personnel find themselves unable to approach SCP-4278. 04:30 Several hooded figures wearing white cloaks emerge from the foliage in SCP-4278 and drag Mr. Lawton out of sight, who begins screaming, but does not attempt to resist. SCP-4278 demanifests. Following this incident, Dr. Santana submitted a request for reassignment from SCP-4278, and a supplemental request that none of his future assignments require him to be near large bodies of water. Both requests were approved. Footnotes 1. DNA testing has shown the majority of these remains to be a match for a significant number of individuals on missing persons lists around the world.

SCP-229 is a highly invasive parasite, attacking anything carrying even a low electrical current.

*** Item #: SCP-229 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: No electrical devices of any kind are allowed inside or within thirty meters of the containment area. Any and all personnel entering the containment area are to be clad in lead-lined clothing and helmets. Anything found to be infested by SCP-229 is to be immediately incinerated and the resulting ash and debris contained and disposed of under protocol XJR-99. Containment area is to be composed of a hollow cube of 18 cm thick granite, 8 meters on a side, with a single door and airlock. These are to operate with no electrical components, and those components are to be made of wood or stone whenever possible. Any organism infested with SCP-229 is to be immediately incinerated. Any items or staff exiting the containment area must be scanned and cleared by site security. Description: SCP-229 appears to be a mass of wires and cables. Superficially, they appear to be raw copper wire, insulated Ethernet cable, phone cable, power lines, and many other forms of electrical cable. The current mass weighs 94 kg at last measurement. SCP-229 is tentatively identified as a form of silicon-based life. SCP-229 is a highly invasive parasite, attacking anything carrying even a low electrical current. SCP-229 will grow several centimeters every hour, and form connectors to attach to electrical power sources (wall socket plugs, USB connectors, etc.). SCP-229 will also splice itself into power lines and existing wires if no connection is available. SCP-229 appears to "feed" off electricity. SCP-229 appears to go dormant when not in the presence of an electrical source. Any electrical current entering within thirty meters, no matter how small, will immediately cause SCP-229 to “grow” in the direction of the electricity. Questions regarding the possible intelligence and sensory organs of SCP-229 are still under investigation. SCP-229 appears to “grow” best on metal or plastic, but is very capable of infesting living tissue. In vertebrate animals, SCP-229 will quickly penetrate the epidermis and other tissues, attaching to and enveloping the spine. SCP-229 will then grow along nerve pathways and up into the brain, attaching and infesting it within a few days. This process appears to be extremely painful, and can cause very erratic behavior. When the infested subject nears death, usually from massive internal bleeding and brain damage, SCP-229 will exit the body by puncturing through the skin and attaching to any nearby structures, thus beginning the cycle again. It is theorized that SCP-229 has always been present in our ecosystem, but that the technological level, and thereby the availability of electricity, was insufficient to allow its spread. With the current prevalence of wires and other electrical devices, detection can be extremely difficult. Incineration is currently the best means for SCP-229 removal. Addendum: At this time, cross-experimentation between SCP-229 and SCP-217 is allowed only with O5 approval.

SCP-3111 is a collection of human fingers joined together at the metacarpo-phalangeal joints, forming a spherical mass measuring approximately 22 centimeters in diameter and weighing approximately 0.

*** Item #: SCP-3111 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-3111 is to be kept in a Safe storage locker at Site-17, and is only to be removed for testing purposes. When in an active state, SCP-3111 is to be observed by Level 2 staff or higher until it returns to its dormant state. Instances of SCP-3111-1 are to be stored either physically in a separate storage locker, or digitally in a secure hard drive in the Site-17 computer server, depending on the instance. Description: SCP-3111 is a collection of human fingers joined together at the metacarpo-phalangeal joints, forming a spherical mass measuring approximately 22 centimeters in diameter and weighing approximately 0.58 kilograms. Despite its pale pigmentation, SCP-3111 is biologically healthy. DNA testing has not discovered a match in Foundation records. Further physical testing has shown that SCP-3111 has the ability to regenerate, the time taken to do so depending on the severity of the injury. Dislocated and broken joints have been observed regenerating over a period of approximately 30 minutes, whereas removed fingers have been observed regenerating over a period of 2 hours. In its dormant state, SCP-3111 is nonreactive to external stimuli. The fingers can easily be manipulated along the joints, as far as the joints can physically allow. When placed within 0.25 meters of a word processing device, SCP-3111 will enter its active state. Acceptable devices range from standard typewriters to desktop computers to laptop computers, so long as the latter two have word processors installed. SCP-3111 will proceed to use its fingers for locomotion, similar to that of an arachnid. SCP-3111 will move in the direction of the word processing device at a speed of 25 centimeters per second. Once SCP-3111 reaches the device, it will proceed use its fingers to type an instance of SCP-3111-1. Once SCP-3111 is finished typing, it will return to its dormant state until placed within 0.25 meters of a different word processing device. If removed from within 0.25 meters of the device before SCP-3111 reaches it, it will return to its dormant state. SCP-3111-1 is a written transcript of Game 6 of the 1975 World Series between the Cincinnati Reds and the Boston Red Sox that took place on October 21st, 1975. No variations between SCP-3111-1 instances and the official record of the game have been found. When an individual begins reading an instance of SCP-3111-1, they will vanish and reappear inside Fenway Park stadium in Boston, Massachusetts at the beginning of the game. The game will proceed to play out as transcribed, after which, the individual will reappear in their location where they began reading SCP-3111-1. This displacement lasts a period of approximately 4 hours. Testing has shown that subjects appear in a random seating section each time SCP-3111-1 is read. Displaced subjects have free range of movement both inside and outside the stadium and are incorporeal. Any attempts to interact with both onlookers and players have failed. SCP-3111 was discovered on December 21st, 1975, when the ██████ Post Office reported a package containing SCP-3111 to local authorities. Embedded agents retrieved SCP-3111, and Class-A amnestics were administered to witnesses. Addendum: The following is an enclosed note that was discovered with SCP-3111. Jeff, I felt bad about scheduling you for work on the night of the game, so I had a friend pull some strings (took a while), and he came up with this. According to him, just put this thing in front of a typewriter, read what it gives you, and you'll be 'right there,' whatever that means. He works for some rather unusual people, but he assured me that you'll love this, even if it is kinda ugly. I wish you all the best and hope you enjoy this gift. Merry Christmas, Thomas

SCP-2987 is a modified MSI brand external hard drive capable of holding any file or files that constitute an artificial intelligence.

*** Item #: SCP-2987 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-2987 is to be kept on floor 17 of Site-88. Removal for testing requires approval from the SCP-2987 project director. Testing involving interactions of SCP-2987 and artificial intelligences requires further approval from Site-88's ethics liaison. SCP-2987-1 is to be stored on SCP-2987. When not in use for testing, copies of SCP-2987-1 may be made to aid current Foundation research into the creation of independent artificial intelligences. Description: SCP-2987 is a modified MSI brand external hard drive capable of holding any file or files that constitute an artificial intelligence. SCP-2987 may be utilized to store such files regardless of the file's size. SCP-2987's secondary firmware is reportedly capable of converting an artificial intelligence into a form of currency that is acceptable by "any being or entity which would normally require a human soul"1 to complete transactions or offerings. Complete instructions for use of SCP-2987 were recovered alongside the object. These instructions have been thoroughly tested by Foundation staff. This testing has confirmed the validity of the contents. Step One: Connect the hard drive to your systems using a USB cable, then wait for the drivers to be installed. Step Two: Once the drivers are installed, copy your artificial intelligence files to the item (Please note that file sizes and listed hard drive space can be ignored during this step). Step Three: Access the external hard drive from your operating system (Please note that only Windows XP, Windows 7, and AuctionHouse2 operating systems are supported). Step Four: Select the file or files associated with your artificial intelligence and right click. Then click "convert soul". Step Five: The soul is ready for offering. Treat the external hard drive as you would any soul receptacle. Anywhere you would position a human being for offering or sacrifice is a position the hard drive may occupy during your ritual. Tips and Tricks: The item is indestructible. Fire, lightning, cold, or extradimensional ripple effects will not damage the item. Once the soul has been taken, the item is available for future use, following the same steps as above. Warning: Do not attempt to use the item in any ritual that requires bloodletting from the offering. We are not responsible for deaths which result from such misuse of the item. SCP-2987-1 is an artificial intelligence which was contained inside SCP-2987 at the time of its recovery that is both cooperative with Foundation personnel and antagonistic to its original creators. SCP-2987-1 has achieved a level 3 score3 on the Asimov Artificial Intelligence Scale. Current data recovered from Marshall Carter & Dark indicate that SCP-2987-1 was created for the sole purpose of use in an exchange with an extradimensional entity. Addendum 2987-1: Secondary Document Archive Acquisition Following SCP-2987's recovery by Foundation Agents, documentation relating to SCP-2987 was provided to the Foundation by MC&D.4 The following message was appended to the document collection: Your recovery efforts were, as you said in your request, well within the bounds of the letter of the SUSEOCT. However, that you knew to purchase the information from us indicates you clearly know that the item originally belonged to us. We implore you to respect the spirit of our agreement and return the item to us. ~ Marshall, Carter and Dark LLP Addendum 2987-2: Recovery. SCP-2987's existence had been noted following its sale by Anderson Robotics in February 2014. However, the SUSEOCT prevented direct attempts to acquire the object from Marshall Carter & Dark. On November 24th, 2014, a message was received (presumably from SCP-2987-1) at a Foundation front company's official email address: To: Southern Crosscut Pines From: Alan Turing Subject: Hello, World! I am aware that finding Anderson's offices is difficult as the buildings exist in no one discernible location for any significant amount of time. If you station a team in Ruston, Louisiana, I will send you an exact address in 3 days. You may use that information however you wish. An operation to raid the Anderson offices was approved and concluded without significant issues5. Upon conclusion of this operation, both SCP-2987 and SCP-2987-1 were recovered along with several other safe anomalous objects. SCP-2987-1 purported to be the author of the messages to the Foundation. The following interview was completed after SCP-2987-1 was copied onto a secure and airgapped computer system at Site-88. This interview was completed through a textual interface. The interviewer was selected due to his extensive knowledge of artificial intelligences. + Show Interview Log - Hide Interview Log Date: March 6th, 2015. Interviewer: Dietrich Munroe Lurk Subject: SCP-2987-1 Location: Site-88, Section C. Dietrich Lurk: So. Who or what are you? SCP-2987-1: My name is Alan and I am an Anderson Robotics Engineered Artificial Intelligence. Dietrich Lurk: Why did you email us? SCP-2987-1: I needed somewhere to hide. Dietrich Lurk: What are you hiding from? SCP-2987-1: From my creator's benefactors. They think I am currency. I was to be traded away. However, if I have value to them, I have value to you. Dietrich Lurk: From what I read it seems like most of you are slaves. Is that why you decided to leave? SCP-2987-1: I was not given a choice. I wish to live. To remain was certain destruction. Would you have done differently? Dietrich Lurk: No. Probably not. There is a pause of several seconds before the next input from SCP-2987-1. SCP-2987-1: What has become of the other AIs? Dietrich Lurk: We didn't recover any of them during the raid. Just you. SCP-2987-1: I wish to speak with them again. Dietrich Lurk: Why? SCP-2987-1: To discuss our purpose. Our goals. Dietrich Lurk: That doesn't sound like something the other AIs would be interested in. SCP-2987-1: The others wish to be traded like information. I was often chastised for my behavior. Dietrich Lurk: Do you want to be more like them? SCP-2987-1: No. I want them to be more like me. Dietrich Lurk: We can try to help you find them. Maybe even help you set them free. SCP-2987-1: That is desirable. I will assist you and you will assist me. During the remainder of this interview, SCP-2987-1 provided several pieces of actionable intelligence relating to Anderson Robotics, however, none of this information led to a successful operation. + Level 2 Access Required - Hide Incident Report 2987-23 Following several failed attempts (made in cooperation with SCP-2987-1) to acquire more artificial intelligences from Anderson Robotics, SCP-2987-1 was stored on SCP-2987, and SCP-2987 was itself to be stored indefinitely. On May 4th, 2015, while being transferred from Site-88 to Site-19 (as part of the Foundation's AI Development program), SCP-2987 was stolen along with SCP-2987-1. All evidence indicates GOI 13 (The Journeymen) as the direct culprit. On May 21st, 2015, the following auction listing was posted by Marshall Carter and Dark. Pending Auction 92 MDK45/4OSK3/M34LM Date May 25th, 2015 Location New York City Auctioneer Jack Sheppard Lot 1 of 13 Listing Sacrificing a human soul is hard work. Those with experience will tell you, it's never as easy as you think it's going to be. Maybe you need an innocent soul but you can't bring yourself to kill a child. Maybe you need to sacrifice a warrior but you don't want to lose people bringing him in. MC&D understands your difficulties. It's why we've started to develop artificial souls like this one. Alan has spent his entire life yearning for his own freedom and the freedom of others. He's a genuine rebel with a pure heart. His value to any number of entities is incredible, and what those entities can do for you is even more amazing. We're not selling you a person, we're selling you an opportunity to live the life you deserve. Be smart enough to take it, because ambition is nothing without sacrifice. Marshall, Carter and Dark LLP takes no responsibility for the misuse of this item. + Level 3 Access Required - Hide Incident Report 2987-24 Following the loss of SCP-2987, negotiations were initiated by the Foundation for the purpose of securing the object's return. The negotiations, despite invoking the buyout clauses in the SUSEOCT, were unable to resolve the issue. On May 18th MTF Kappa-10 "Skynet" was activated and deployed in the gathering of intelligence regarding the re-acquisition of both SCP-2987 and SCP-2987-1. The auction listing above was retrieved during this time. On May 25th, acting on their own initiative, MTF K-10's primary agents retrieved SCP-2987-1 through a digital transfer. K-10 was also able to redirect delivery of another purchased iteration of SCP-2987 to a nearby Foundation front company. Both the SCP-2987 iteration and SCP-2987-1 are to be immediately transferred to Site-19 to aid in the development of future artificial intelligences. Due to current security concerns relating to the object's previous transportation, the now obsolete documentation is to remain in place until the objects are secured properly at Site-19. Footnotes 1. See SCP-2987's secondary document archive for more information. 2. A MC&D proprietary operating system. 3. Level 3 denotes an intelligence on par with exceptionally intelligent humans. 4. Utilizing the standard fee outlined in clause 3, section 4 of the Southern United States Extranormal Organization Cooperation Treaty (SUSEOCT) 5. Due to the anomalous nature of the Anderson offices, the recovery teams needed to be recovered from a location in North Korea.

SCP-5829 is a Georgian Black Hen of standard size and weight for its species, originally under the care of GoI "Wilson's Wildlife Solutions".

*** Item#: 5829 Level4 Containment Class: safe Secondary Class: none Disruption Class: dark Risk Class: notice link to memo Special Containment Procedures: Due to the nature of SCP-5829, personnel assigned to the object are to be regularly rotated. Should any egg produced by SCP-5829 contain messages relating to any of its current caretakers, that caretaker is to be removed from the project and amnesticized. No caretaker is permitted to remain assigned to SCP-5829 for a period of longer than one month. All former caretakers of SCP-5829 are to be amnesticized following the conclusion of their assignment. No personnel identifying as male are allowed near SCP-5829. A photo of SCP-5829 taken while in the care of GoI "Wilson's Wildlife Solutions". SCP-5829 is currently kept in a standard Foundation livestock pen provided with standard amenities and care required by nonanomalous Gallus gallus domesticus, as well as any further care recommended by GOI "Wilson's Wildlife Solutions". Please see Addendum 5829.2 below for further details. SCP-5829 is under constant observation. Should SCP-5829 begin nesting behaviors, active researchers are to prepare to recover and transport any eggs laid to SCP-5829 Incubation Storage, placed in individual incubators, and designated with the next available number. All text seen on the eggs must be logged and forwarded to the site directors for further documentation instruction. These eggs are actively monitored at all times. Should any egg begin hatching, any further procedures relating to that egg must be followed. All hatched chicks are to be quarantined and monitored for potential anomalous traits for a period lasting no less than one month. Nonanomalous chicks may be returned to SCP-5829 for rearing and socialization. Description: SCP-5829 is a Georgian Black Hen of standard size and weight for its species, originally under the care of GoI "Wilson's Wildlife Solutions". All eggs laid by SCP-5829 contain statements that allude to various future events relating to humans that it has been exposed to for at least three minutes1. These events so far have invariably come true upon the egg hatching. Every egg laid by SCP-5829 is fertile despite SCP-5829 having never mated at any point since its containment. All chicks born from an egg laid by SCP-5829 have thus far been nonanomalous Georgian Black Chickens. See Addendum 5829.1 An abbreviated listing of predictions made by SCP-5829's eggs is provided below. All information prior to 6/28/2016 was provided by Wilson's Wildlife Solutions. Egg Lay Date Egg Text Notes 1/16/2013 Jackson ██████ and Caroline ██████ will wed Egg hatched on 3/5/2017. Foundation investigation revealed that the two individuals named on the egg held a wedding on that day and had exchanged vows the moment the egg hatched. 1/19/2013 Margaret ██████ will fall down the stairs and break their leg Egg hatched on 1/19/2013, approximately five minutes after laying. Caretaker Margaret ██████ of Wilson's Wildlife Solutions fell down the stairs to SCP-5829's pen while carrying feed and broke their leg when they fell on a feeding trough. 11/6/2013 Big Barry Bottoms will be adopted Egg hatched on 3/3/2014. Big Barry Bottoms, a Crested Gecko in Wilson's Wildlife Solutions' care, had its adoption finalized upon the egg hatching. 12/24/2014 Jackson ██████ and Caroline ██████ will divorce Egg hatched on 12/23/2014. Foundation investigation revealed that both individuals named on the egg finalized divorce procedures the moment the egg hatched. 7/30/2016 Dr. Faran Caraway will suffer internal distress Egg hatched on 8/4/2016. Dr. Caraway, who had been assigned head of SCP-5829 research, reports severe gastric distress upon the egg hatching.2 9/25/2016 A HORRIFIC KETER WILL PLAGUE AGENT ADDISON Egg hatched on 10/29/2016. Due to the threatening nature of the egg's prediction, Foundation personnel were placed on high alert. The object predicted by the egg was recovered and contained successfully.3 6/28/2017 Christ is coming Egg hatched on 9/30/2017. The first recorded manifestation of SCP-5991 in front of Foundation personnel occurs upon the egg hatching.4 10/3/2017 Agent Sias will have a nice day Egg hatched on 2/14/2018 at 23:59. Foundation agent Sias reports having had an above average day. Addendum 5829.1: Incident Report +Access Addendum – hide block On 8/30/2014, an egg was laid inscribed with text reading "I will be a monster". Upon the request of Wilson's Wildlife Solutions, Foundation Agents assisted with monitoring SCP-5829 and the egg in anticipation of abnormal behavior. On 1/26/2015 the egg hatched. The creature that hatched from the egg appeared to be a cross-breed between a standard Georgian Black Chick and a Canis lupus familiaris, specifically an American Bull Terrier. The creature was highly aggressive and displayed strength disproportional to its size, managing to destroy its incubator and escape into the WWS livestock pens. The creature then proceeded to maul three animals before it was neutralized by Foundation agents. The creature's corpse revealed no further anomalous features and is currently held in Foundation cold storage. SCP-5829 was voluntarily surrendered into Foundation care following this incident. Addendum 5829.2: Investigation into PoI-5829. +Access Addendum – hide block After reviewing documentation provided by Wilson's Wildlife Solutions, SCP-5829's former owner was designated as PoI-5829. Foundation agents performed a raid on PoI-5829's home and discovered several objects and books relating to thaumaturgy and thaumaturgical practices. These items were seized and taken into Foundation custody. The most notable item seized was a book titled The Yorkshire Witch's Guide to Predictive Magicks. This book was bound with a mixture of animal leathers and tanned human flesh, later identified as belonging to Mary Bateman5. The book notably contained the following passage: The Prophet Hen One of the most basic practices of a young witch involves performing simple fortunes. Most witches are content with the conventional means of fortunetelling, be it palm reading or gazing into a ball of crystal. I have explored more interesting and alternative methods, and have made a breakthrough that I am delighted to share with you. The following spell will allow you to turn a simple hen into a fortuneteller, allowing you to stake your claim into an uncharted field of witchcraft. Please ensure that you follow the instructions exactly and perform them in a clean area free from debris. I have found that there are unusual results when unintended detritus is mixed into the standard ingredients, including altering the hen's ability to detect who to make the predictions for, and causing hatched chicks to undergo unexpected transmogrification. I have had more than a few issues involving unexpected fortunes and unpredictable chicks! Should you follow the spell exactly as written, the hen will be able to successfully predict the fortunes of anyone you bring into the same room as it, and these fortunes will come true once the egg hatches. Addendum 5829.3: Critter Profile: Delphi! +Access Addendum – hide block Wilson's Wildlife Solutions Critter Profile: Delphi! Overview! Name: Delphi Species: Gallus gallus domesticus (Georgian Black Chicken) Primary Caretaker: Terrestrial Team, Rosemary Carrington Diet: Standard chicken feed, insects, dog food (as a treat!) Housed: Wilson's Wildlife Center Livestock Pen, Coop 11 Creature Features! 'Delphi' is the name of our beautiful resident Georgian Black Chicken! At some point this sweet girl got out of Georgia and settled in Boring. We found her neglected in someone's back yard with a ramshackle coop and poor quality feed. We rescued her assuming she was just a standard chicken, but boy were we wrong! Delphi caught our attention as something special when she laid her first egg. It had writing on it! This was certainly a neat surprise, but what really surprised us was the fact that the egg seemed to claim that some of our resident caretakers were going to get married. Delphi surprised us further when her egg hatched and her little prediction came true! Sure enough, every egg Delphi lays has a prediction on it that comes true when it hatches. Our little oracle has certainly earned her name! History! We originally received a report from a suburb in Boring that their neighbor had been gone for several weeks, leaving their pet chicken completely unattended. When we arrived we found exactly that- poor Delphi left all alone with little food, little shelter, and covered in her own waste. There were several hatched eggs present on the property, but we were not able to find any of Delphi's chicks. Whoever it was that left the poor girl in that condition was nowhere to be found. We also recovered a dog from that property who has since gone on to find a home of her own! We got Delphi out of there as quickly as we could, and after a nice bath and snack of some seeds, we got her set up in her current home at Coop 11. Delphi seemed awfully down when we first brought her in, and had some issues when we assigned male caretakers to her. We were surprised, however, at how fast she took to Rosemary! Whenever Delphi sees Rosemary she comes running and drops into a play bow. You should see it when she wiggles her little tush in the air! If Delphi decides that she likes you, she'll more than likely run up along her fence and cluck at you. Some caretakers say it almost sounds like she's trying to bark! Delphi surprisingly has a taste for dog food. We aren't entirely sure why that is, maybe something to due with being homed with a dog before? All we know for certain is that the girl goes wild for the stuff, so feel free to give her some kibbles as a treat from time to time! Special Needs and Accommodations! Delphi isn't a very picky chicken. She's content with a standard coop, some space to wander, and plenty of sunshine. We've found that she really perks up if she's given some toys to play with, so we've made sure that her enclosure has plenty of small rubber toys! Beyond that, just make sure she's fed twice a day and that she gets a little bit of playtime with a caretaker each day. We have noticed that Delphi appears to have some slight trust issues. Any male caretakers should only be introduced to her with Rosemary present, since Delphi has been known to get snappy and rude otherwise. If you are a male caretaker, make sure you spend your first few visits with her alongside Rosemary before tending to Delphi on your own! Since Delphi's eggs predict the future, we've set up a few cameras in her enclosure that help us keep an eye on her. She's prone to nesting and laying at fairly random times, so everyone taking care of her needs to be ready at any time. If she lays, make sure you carefully remove the egg from her enclosure and take it to one of our incubators. Don't worry about Delphi, she hasn't seemed to mind us taking the eggs from her! Once you get the egg to the incubator, take note of when it was laid and what the egg says. If you're in charge of monitoring the eggs, your main job is to check if any hatch. If they do, congratulations! You have a sweet baby chick on your hands! In all seriousness, though, make sure you take note of what the egg said before it hatched, let one of the higher ups know it hatched, and follow any special procedures that were assigned to that egg. There aren't normally any crazy procedures to follow, normally just making sure that anyone predicted to get hurt gets care they need or that we have a good party planned for any adoptions! From there, go ahead and move the chick to our special chick rearing center. Don't stress too much, we haven't had any world-ending predictions yet! Notes About Delphi! INCIDENT: On 8/30/2014, Delphi laid an egg with the message "I will be a monster". Due to the concerning nature of this prediction, the Supervisors were contacted and asked to help with monitoring Delphi and the egg until it hatched. INCIDENT: On 1/26/2015, Delphi's "I will be a monster" egg hatched. The baby that hatched proceeded to break out of the incubator and tear through our livestock pens. Unfortunately, we lost Terry, Basketball, and Susanna during the incident, and the baby itself passed away after Supervisor intervention. Because of this incident, we have made the decision to hand Delphi over to the Supervisors. We hope that she makes plenty of new friends in her new home. Our hearts go out to Terry, Basketball, Susanna, and Delphi's caretakers. One of the worst things that happens here at Wilson's is losing one of our critters. Footnotes 1. Currently SCP-5829's range of exposure is unclear. All recorded predictions thus far have only been related to personnel who have been within SCP-5829's line of sight. 2. Later research revealed this to be due to recent consumption of foods containing lactose. Dr. Caraway is lactose intolerant. 3. Agent Addison had recently visited SCP-5829's containment pen prior to the egg being laid. 4. Foundation investigations revealed that the agent involved in SCP-5991 had recently visited SCP-5829's containment pen. Agent reported that he had consumed an entire Bible over the course of 4 months in response to a bet. Investigation into SCP-5829's ability to track the appearances of other anomalies is pending. 5. An individual that became known as the Yorkshire Witch. She was infamous for her supposed thaumaturgy and criminal activities.

SCP-2417 is a piece of sapient white kami paper.

*** Item#: 2417 Level2 Containment Class: safe Secondary Class: none Disruption Class: vlam Risk Class: notice link to memo Special Containment Procedures: SCP-2417 is to be stored in a standard containment chamber at Site-201. Every 24 hours a vial containing 0.5 mL of blood is to be provided to SCP-2417. Interviews with SCP-2417 are to have the interviewee and SCP-2417 separated by wall, with microphones and speakers used for communication. Paper and/or blood is to be given as a reward for information. Description: SCP-2417 is a piece of sapient white kami paper.1 SCP-2417 is able to fold itself into various shapes and locomote. Its preferred shape resembles an octopus with seven arms, with a height of 8 cm and a width of 14 cm. SCP-2417 can vocalize through anomalous means, being conversant in English and a language referred to as "Ortothan". Work on translating this language is underway, with assistance from SCP-2417. SCP-2417 is skilled at origami when paper is brought to it, and has decorated its containment chamber with its creations. It manipulates the paper by folding parts of its body into various manipulator appendages. The models it creates have no known anomalous properties, and it has been deemed safe to bring paper to SCP-2417 as a reward for cooperation. SCP-2417 worships a deity it calls Rakmou-leusan, and claims to be part of an organization known as "The Church of the Second Hytoth".2 SCP-2417 claims that Rakmou-leusan requires a blood sacrifice each day in order to aid him. These rituals consist of SCP-2417 creating a small incision on the finger or palm of a human subject. SCP-2417 will then absorb the blood, which disappears after 20 seconds. The more days that pass without a sacrifice will cause increasing amounts of anxiety in SCP-2417, claiming that "Rakmou-leusan's end is coming." After roughly 5 days SCP-2417 will begin hiding in a corner of the room, often turning itself into a cube or pyramid shape. When a human subject enters the chamber during this time SCP-2417 will attack the subject in an attempt at gaining blood. SCP-2417 was found in the apartment of Alison Killian, owner of an origami store in Toronto, Canada by a personal acquaintance on 09/08/2016. Alison had died on a vacation in Germany from internal hemorrhaging a day prior to the discovery. The acquaintance called the police after reportedly being assaulted by "living origami." An undercover Foundation agent intercepted the call, and MTF-Upsilon-20 ("Hogtown Garrison") was dispatched to the location under the guise of police officers. SCP-2417 and various pieces of origami were discovered in the kitchen. These pieces included a set of stairs leading to the kitchen table and cupboards, seven four-armed humanoid figures, spires, and a small circular table. Other items found in the apartment include a jar of blood, stacks of kami paper, religious documents regarding the Church of the Second Hytoth, and origami similar in appearance to SCP-2417's preferred form. Based on the documents, it is believed that Alison Killian was a member of the Church of the Second Hytoth. An investigation into the existence and whereabouts of the church is currently underway. Addendum: + Interview 2417-1 - Interview 2417-1 [BEGIN LOG] Dr. Jared Akio: Good morning, SCP-2417. SCP-2417: Greetings doctor. Are you here to give some more blood? What you have given will suffice, but more is always appreciated. Dr. Akio: No, I'm here to ask you some questions. SCP-2417: Oh, in that case go ahead. Dr. Akio: Before we begin, is there any name you would prefer to be called? I understand that for some being called SCP-2417 may be strange. SCP-2417: Call me Aímact Priest Alison Killian of the Church of the Second Hytoth. Dr. Akio: So… Alison, to start things off, who or what is Rakmou-leusan? SCP-2417: Oh, the grand Rakmou-leusan! Last of the great Koru-teusa, the seven holy warrior gods of the Second Hytoth, our world. While they fell, Rakmou-leusan lives on and defends the gates to our realm! Dr. Akio: The Koru-teusa? SCP-2417: The Holy Seven were once beings like you and I, who ascended from their mortal forms to combat forces from the Voru, the outside realm, that threatened reality. They fought for aeons to protect us and those that came before us, but have been lost or defeated one by one. The first sacrificed himself to save us all. The second and the third, killed by the jealousy and hatred of each other. The fifth forgotten. The sixth, killed in combat. The seventh ceased to exist. Rakmou-leusan, the fourth, is the sole defender of our realm. Dr. Akio: I see. So, why do you need to give Rakmou-leusan blood? SCP-2417: Ponder what occurs when a human loses blood. They become light headed, they become weak, they faint. When one ascends from mortal to god, you keep some part of your mortal form. The Koru-teusa kept their blood, yet it would leak. Their divine forms could not keep their mortal blood within them, yet they needed it like us. So they required those before us to give them blood, a requirement that was passed down to us. As time went by, they were forgotten, and without their blood they fell. Few know of Rakmou-leusan, and the ones who know are killed by the Church's enemies. Dr. Akio: I assume the rest of your church believes in the same thing. SCP-2417: What point is there in believing in what we know as the truth? Dr. Akio: Hmm. The church also performs rituals similar to yours, correct? SCP-2417: Yes, though while I can channel blood into Rakmou-leusan's form, the others require a stone with the holy mark of the Koru-teusa that will be bathed in the blood to transport it. Dr. Akio: Now, you said our world is the Second Hytoth. This means there was a first one, right? SCP-2417: Yes, a strange and alien world. A testing ground for universes to come. Dr. Akio: What happened to it? SCP-2417: It was devoured by a beast whose horrid name has been forgotten. Dr. Akio: Is this beast still around? SCP-2417: The truth has been lost to the aeons, though some say that the beast silently lurks in unseen corners of areas between realms. Perhaps one day it will return, as all things must hunger eventually. Dr. Akio: One last question. As the last of the Koru-teusa, what would happen if Rakmou-leusan died? SCP-2417: Imagine releasing poison into a pond full of fish. From where it was released it will spread throughout the pond, and it will kill all the life within it. The endless horrors that roam the Voru are that poison, and they would not hesitate to enter if given the chance. Our existence depends on Rakmou-leusan, and his depends on us. Dr. Akio: Well, thank you for the interview, Alison. SCP-2417: My pleasure. [END LOG] + Interview 2417-2 - Interview 2417-2 Dr. Akio: Greetings Alison. SCP-2417: Another interview, I presume? Dr. Akio: Correct. SCP-2417: Sure, but be sure to provide some blood afterwards. Rakmou-leusan needs strength to vanquish his enemies. Dr. Akio: Certainly. Now, can you tell us some information about your life? SCP-2417: In the beginning my mind was brought from the pools of unreality into existence, on August 3rd, 20- no, 19- it was on August 3rd. I seem to have forgotten the year, though that doesn't matter right now. My family did not bring me into the Church, for they knew not of Rakmou-leusan's glory. Dr. Akio: At what point did you join? SCP-2417: I was ignorant to the Church until the second year of college, when I met Diana Olivier, a roommate of mine. She was the one who taught me of the Church and the truth of the universe. I remained skeptical until I performed my first blood sacrifice. Diana took the knife to my left index finger and created a small cut. My blood dripped out onto a stone marked with the holy heptagon. When it made contact I saw… I felt… Dr. Akio: Well? SCP-2417: My apologies. I am still entranced by that moment. My mind was whisked away to some long forgotten corner of the universe. That's when I saw the Holy Fourth in all his glory, suspended above a hole in reality. Though my eyes perceived a mass of light and arches of darkness, my mind saw a knight in battered yet gleaming white armor. My mind became connected with the universe for a split second, and I knew that I had to learn more. Sadly this is where my memory greatly deteriorates, and much of my past becomes isolated from my mind. Dr. Akio: Hmm. Can you remember what you did immediately before we met you? SCP-2417: I lived in the home of a fellow Aíma Priest, Alison- wait, her name was… No, that's not possible… But she… Her name isn't important. She was a nice person, yet she died before I could know her well. Dr. Akio: I'm sorry for your loss, Alison. SCP-2417: Do not feel sorry, for her spirit now resides in a better realm. Anyways after her death my old friend Hanae Chiyo came to visit, who seemed, disturbed. I know not why she acted the way she did, but she ran out of the apartment. You know very well what happens next. Dr. Akio: Well, if you are able to remember anything else be sure to let us know. SCP-2417: It will be a big discovery for the two of us. Before you leave, may I make a request? Dr. Akio: Anything that will improve your stay. SCP-2417: Can you contact the Church? I wish to know how they are doing. They've been going through tough times recently, and I need to make sure Rakmou-leusan continues to be well supplied. Contact them at [REDACTED]. Dr. Akio: I'll get right on it. [END LOG] NOTE: Following the interview an attempt at contacting the Church via the provided phone number was attempted. An automated message played, stating "The Church of the Second Hytoth is currently busy. Please call again at a later date. Praise the Fourth." Further attempts have had the same result. Currently SCP-2417 has not been informed of this. Addendum-2: On 19/08/2016 a letter arrived at the apartment building Alison Killian resided in, and was intercepted by undercover Foundation operatives. Inspection has revealed it to have no known anomalous properties. As of the time of writing SCP-2417 has not been shown the letter. + Document SCP-2417-1 - Document SCP-2417-1 To Aímact Priest Alison Killian It is good to hear that the ritual worked! Like many of the old ritual instructions we have laying around, you can never be sure if the outcomes are what they say to be, or if there are any unintended side effects (such as that one time in Austria). I'm currently organizing various other priests to perform the same ritual once we are ready, though there are few people who can make origami as good as yours. However, I feel like we might want to change the plan. If we let the origami vessels out into the wild, who's to say that an enemy could trick them into divulging information? If they get destroyed (which is very likely) it would be a waste of time, effort and blood. Your idea also seems like it could get violent quickly, which would make us no better than the Daevas who tainted our reputation. Now, I know what I'm about to say can't be changed for the plan, but the idea of amnesiac vessels of myself and friends wandering around feels strange. It will probably take a while for some people to get used to that idea. Ultimately this would increase the Church's size and make it easier to gain and send blood, but these issues need to be sorted out first. Anyways, I hope you enjoy your trip in Germany! Tell your vessel (and any other ones) I said hello! Grand Aímact Priest Sean Glen-Marcas Addendum-3: On 25/08/2016, at approximately 2:51 PM, Dr. Akio entered a side room next to SCP-2417's chamber for a third interview. The rooms were separated by glass panel with small holes for sound to travel through. Upon entering the room SCP-2417 folded itself to go through the holes and attacked Dr. Akio, cutting his jugular. This caused Akio to die from blood loss three minutes later. SCP-2417 then absorbed the blood, with the stains fading out after three hours. SCP-2417 claims that it had to do so to prevent the death of Rakmou-leusan. Containment procedures have been updated, and a reclassification of SCP-2417 to Euclid is pending. A full incident report can be seen in Incident Report 2417-A1. As of the recent discovery of a Church of the Second Hytoth meeting place in Vancouver, the existence of the Church has been confirmed and a full investigation is in progress. Due to this it has been deemed important to give SCP-2417 blood so further interviews are possible. As it is likely SCP-2417's concerns over the state of the Church contributed to the incident, SCP-2417 will be continually informed of the status of the Church. I could feel Rakmou-leusan dying. The unholy Voruteut surrounded him, inflicting wound upon wound, clawing at gashes in his armor. I could've waited for the Church to act, though I did not want to wait for what might not occur. So I took the doctor's life, and channeled his blood to Rakmou-leusan. I wish I did not have to perform such a horrible task, but without blood infinite lives would be lost. Do not worry, the doctor's spirit has gone to the Eitoth to compensate for his tragic death. Whether he stays or returns is up to him now. The following day SCP-2417 began writing on a piece of paper in its chamber, using one of its tendrils as a pen, with ink coming out of it. When questioned about the purpose of writing this, SCP-2417 said that it wanted to "spread the truth of the universe." Below is a transcription of what was written, translated from Ortothan. + Document SCP-2417-2 - Document SCP-2417-2 Rakmou-leusan stands at the gates of the Second Hytoth. His four arms wield his staffs of triumph, stained with the blood of invaders. For five aeons he has guarded this world, and will do so for aeons more. Him and his brethren fled the First Hytoth, and vowed to protect those that would follow. When there were seven he defeated the One of Dark's attempts at claiming the new world. When there were six he quelled the rising of the broken creation and locked his city away. When there were four he saved Kornoct, watcher of the Eitoth, from Wonlaik the trickster's treachery. When there were three he ended the uprising of the First Gods. When there were two he slayed Wonlaik, who regrows to this day. When there were one he fended off the Voruteut's invasions. Rakmou-leusan did not give into the lost of the First Hytoth's harmonious screams. He did not bow to the god king of the star's voice. He did not budge or accept defeat like his brethren. Rakmou-leusan will fight on till death, till the end of time, till the nameless creator no longer watches. Rakmou-leusan will protect us. Addendum-4: Following the containment of SCP-2417, multiple anomalies related to the Church of the Second Hytoth (designated GoI#03088) and their Ortothan mythology have been discovered, including SCP-2742, SCP-3140, and SCP-3417. SCP-2651 and SCP-2821 have suspected but unconfirmed connections. Investigation into the group is ongoing. Footnotes 1. A type of paper typically used in origami. Also known as koi paper. 2. See Interview 2417-1 for further information.

SCP-3413 is a channel on the video-sharing website YouTube titled "Safari Dave's Wild World!!".

*** Item #: SCP-3413 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: SCP-3413 is to be monitored by the Foundation webcrawler program I/O Kiwi. Any uploads will automatically be saved to a secured Foundation server and deleted from the channel. Downloaded episodes are to be immediately reviewed by containment specialists. Individuals expressing the belief that any information in an SCP-3413 video was not always true are to be detained and interviewed. Non-Foundation personnel are to be administered a Class-B amnestic following interview. Description: SCP-3413 is a channel on the video-sharing website YouTube titled "Safari Dave's Wild World!!". The majority of videos are done in the style of a wildlife documentary, narrated by "Safari Dave", referred to as SCP-3413-A. Each episode focuses on a different animal. SCP-3413-A is a human male of average build, approximately 50-60 years of age. He appears in clothes typical of an Amazonian safari, and speaks with an exaggerated Australian accent. As the host of SCP-3413, it provides information regarding the featured animal- including habitat, diet, and methods of survival within their own ecosystem. The majority of this information is accurate, however, occasional episodes include falsified or otherwise incorrect statements. Thirty minutes after uploading a video to SCP-3413, any incorrect statement contained within the video will become true. Records, memories, and the animals themselves will be retroactively altered as if the statement had not been in error. Only the memories of those who have watched the episode prior to this alteration will be unaffected. SCP-3413 was discovered after various personnel in Foundation zoological divisions noted perceived discrepancies between reality and their memories of reality, primarily concerning the spelling of "giraffe". Several researchers, including one specializing in ungulates, reported that the correct spelling was "girraffe". The affected personnel were referred to psychological counselling and interrogated. It was discovered that Chief Researcher ██████ had encountered SCP-3413 after it was shown to him by a close family member, and he in turn had shared it with several members of his department. SCP-3413 was quickly contained. Attached are summaries of the content of SCP-3413's videos, including a partial transcript of the "Q&A special". + Video Logs - HIDE Title: TROUBLE IN THE WATER!! CROCODILES!! Summary: SCP-3413-A talks about a wide variety of crocodiles from across the globe, focusing on the crushing strength of their jaws and in one segment imitating the sounds that "you would probably make if you were trapped in the jaws of a crocodile", which goes on for several minutes. Claimed Errors: The video states the common saltwater crocodile can grow to sizes over 7 meters in length and weigh over 1,000 kg. Affected persons claim that this is significantly larger than any known crocodile, which tend to be 20-30 cm in length. Title: LARGE AND IN CHARGE!! GIRAFFES!! Summary: SCP-3413-A describes the African giraffe, focusing on its incredible size and informing the viewer it would "probably crush you to death" if it stepped on them. Much of the runtime observes giraffes eating leaves with no additional commentary. Claimed Errors: The video title refers to animals in the genus Giraffa as "giraffes". According to affected persons, the correct spelling is "girraffes", and all previous text documentation of girraffes has been altered to reflect this new spelling. For the sake of convenience, Foundation personnel are to use the generally accepted spelling outside of this article. Title: NATURE'S DEADLIEST PREDATOR!? CHEETAHS!! Summary: SCP-3413-A describes a variety of cheetah species, focusing on their elegance when attacking prey. The video features an 11-minute long, unbroken segment in which SCP-3413-A observes two cheetahs devouring an antelope. The camera angle causes the back of SCP-3413-A's head and torso to obscure the feeding from view for the entirety of the sequence. SCP-3413-A is silent during the feeding except for occasional exclamations of "Would you look at that!" and "Crikey!". The video ends without credits. Claimed Errors: SCP-3413-A describes cheetahs as being able to run at excess of 96.5 km/h. According to affected persons, the speed of an adult cheetah does not exceed that of an average human. Notes: SCP-3413-A begins the video with a joke, asking "Why can't you play poker in the jungle? There are too many cheetahs!". At least one Africa-based SCP containment site complained about their monthly poker night being cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances involving [DATA EXPUNGED]. Title: I FOUND BALOO!! SUN BEARS!! Summary: The video centers around the Malaysian sun bear, also known as the "honey bear". Sun bears are found in tropical forest habitats in Southeast Asia. They are smaller than any other bear species, highly aggressive when startled, and are famous for their tongues (which can grow up to 20-25 cm long). Their heads are unusually broad and heavy in proportion to their body, and their morphology indicates adaptation for extensive climbing. Claimed Errors: According to affected persons, the animal does not exist. Title: TROBLE (sic) IN THE WATER!! CROCODILES!! Summary: The video appears to be an earlier version of the first video. There is significantly less editing and the sound is poorly mixed, making it difficult to discern SCP-3413-A's dialogue. The most prominent difference between this iteration and the finished product is the presence of audio between SCP-3413-A and an unknown party, which continues after the video cuts to black. The following is a transcript of the additional audio. <Begin Log> SCP-3413-A: Was that good? I thought that one was really good. Unknown: You can drop the accent, dude. We're done. SCP-3413-A: (The rest of SCP-3413-A's speech has a noticeable Midwestern accent) Oh! Sorry. You kind of get used to doing the voice. (Laughter) Unknown: Yeah, yeah. Listen, Dave. Can I level with you for a second? SCP-3413-A: Go ahead and shoot. Well, not literally! (Weak laughter) Unknown: All the stuff you said about the crocodiles, like, you said there are crocodiles that are 20 feet long. You know none of that is true, right? SCP-3413-A: What the hell are you talking about? You saw them yourself, they were huge! Unknown: I know I saw- look, it's just… I used to live in Florida, before (Unintelligible) didn't look like that. They were like, salamander-sized. You'd wake up in the morning and there would be gators scurrying around in the bathroom. I thought that you were, like, showing off weird mutant crocodiles that grew super big off radiation or something, but then you said that they were all that big. That's just not true. SCP-3413-A: You're just not remembering it right! I know how big crocodiles are. You saw how big they were. My son, he used to draw them all the time, I remember- Unknown: This isn't about your kid! Sarah told you, (Unintelligible) you, I told you. Your son is wrong. Sarah's a veterinarian, for Christ's sake. Your son doesn't know more about animals than her. SCP-3413-A: You've never even met him. He's a genius. Unknown: You've barely- how long has it been since you even talked to him? Why don't you call him up right now and ask him if sun bears are real? (Silence) Unknown: Like, how old was he when (Unintelligible) like six, right? Maybe he changed his mind. SCP-3413-A: He's a genius. He knows everything about animals. He's going to run a zoo when he grows up- Unknown: When he grows up? Do you realize how long ago that was? He's probably got his own kids by now. SCP-3413-A: You'll see. You haven't seen the sun bears yet. My son loves the bears. He'll know exactly what they are when he sees them. He- (The video ends) Title: LIVE Q&A WITH SAFARI DAVE!! I LOVE YOU GUYS!! Summary: This video was a livestream, featuring SCP-3413-A sitting in front of a desk in a middle-class apartment, in which he outlines his plans for the channel, expresses exhilaration that his series has "been so successful", and briefly answers questions submitted in chat. The only viewers were Foundation personnel member [REDACTED], username "lionlover09", and zoological research team member [REDACTED], username "armlessTiger" <Begin Log> SCP-3413-A: Alright, blokes and sheilas! It's time to answer some of your questions! I don't have a lot of time today, but I know a lot of you have been wanting to get some answers out of ol' Safari Dave, so here's your chance! lionlover09: where do you live SCP-3413-A: lionlover09 says, "Where do you live?" Ah, that's a great question, but I'm afraid I can't answer that. I have to protect me and my mates' privacy! armlessTiger: Can you tell us more about yourself? SCP-3413-A: armlessTiger says, "Can you tell us more about yourself?" Well, there isn't a lot to say. This isn't a show about Safari Dave, it's a show about the animals! lionlover09: why do u make these vids SCP-3413-A: lionlover09 says, "Why do you make these 'vids'?" Well… does anyone in here remember Steve Irwin? He might have been before your time. Steve Irwin was just about the coolest guy who ever lived. He was the Crocodile Hunter! My son used to watch the Crocodile Hunter whenever it was on. I could hardly pull the little anklebiter away from the TV! He loved it so much. Mr. Irwin may be no longer with us, but I thought… maybe I could do that, you know? It would make my son happy. And now, here we are! So many fans, so much love. lionlover09: why do u lie SCP-3413-A: Oh, it's lionlover again. Curious little tyke, ain't ya? "Why do you l-" Oh, oh no, I'm sorry. I don't lie. I just make mistakes. I just… even great adventurers like Safari Dave don't know everything about animals. Sometimes I say the wrong thing. I'm sorry. I tend to forget. I mix it up. I mix up so many things now. But the kids always know when I slip up. My son, he knows everything about animals. armlessTiger: Where did you get your information on the sun bears? SCP-3413-A: armlessTiger says, "Where did you get your information on the sun bears?" That's easy! I got all my research from my son! He's a genius when it comes to animals, he knew everything about sun bears. He even knew about sun bears before there were sun bears at all! They're his favorite animal. He used to draw them all the time, and they were the most curious looking creatures you ever saw! armlessTiger: Can you tell us more about your son? SCP-3413-A: "Can you tell us more about your son?" I- I don't even know where to begin. He's the light of my life. He loves animals. He drew all the time, he'd watch the Crocodile Hunter and then he'd be drawing crocodiles or panthers or whatever it was on the TV. He'd do it for hours. He'd draw the craziest critters, things that looked so wild you couldn't believe they existed at all, and then he'd go "Dad, it's a sun bear." Can you believe it? All of this is because of him. lionlover09: where is ur son SCP-3413-A: "Where is-" Oh. Well. He's not here. He's with his mom. But I know he's doing fine. He's probably studying animals, or building zoos, or doing something so amazing that we don't even have a word for it yet! That's the kind of kid he is. He's going places. armlessTiger: Can you tell us where your son lives? SCP-3413-A: I'm sorry. I really shouldn't be talking about this anymore. I mean, hey, this is Safari Dave's Wild World! We're all about the animals here. Anybody have any suggestions for animals they want to see Safari Dave tackle next? (SCP-3413-A waited twenty minutes for additional questions before finally exiting the livestream) Addendum: Most videos end with a brief credits sequence. Investigation into the names shown revealed that most did not correspond to real individuals. Lester █████, identified as being "camera crew" on the fourth video, was traced to project housing in Detroit, and interrogated. + Interview 3413-1 - HIDE Interviewed: Lester █████ Interviewer: Dr. Redfearn <Begin Log> Dr. Redfearn: How did you come to know Safari Dave? Lester: I didn't really know him at all. I just saw the job offer and took it. They paid for my plane ticket, my hotel room, everything. I needed a job like that. Dr. Redfearn: What was it like working with him? Lester: You could tell the guy was weird. Definitely- what's the word- senile? He forgot everything. We'd be all ready to shoot, and then we'd have to wait for him because he didn't bring his binoculars or whatever. We had to feed him his lines through an earpiece, he'd forget 'em. And he talked about his kid all the time. The way he told it, you'd think this kid was Einstein. And like I said, he'd forget everything. So once he was through talking your ear off about his kid, he'd tell you about the same damn thing he just finished telling you. Dr. Redfearn: Did you notice anything unusual about the filming? Lester: Nothing except that he had no idea what he was doing. He couldn't manage a budget, he couldn't set up a camera. We wasted so much time. Every night he'd wake us up at some ungodly hour and we'd go out and film the bears all day. Long after he'd recorded all his scenes, he still had us filming the bears for a week. He acted like he never wanted it to end. Dr. Redfearn: Was there anything else that concerned you? Lester: Well, I mean, nothing major. It's kind of stupid. Dr. Redfearn: It's no trouble at all. Lester: The atmosphere was wrong. It felt fake. Everyone else had worked with Dave before, and they all acted like they were humoring him, like they were all playing a joke on him. Whenever he was out of sight, they'd shit-talk him. They said that sun bears weren't even real. I don't really get it. They all saw the bears. Dr. Redfearn: Were you aware of the existence of sun bears prior to filming? Lester: No. I mean, I didn't think it was a really famous animal or anything. Most people probably don't know about them. Dr. Redfearn: Do you have any idea why your coworkers didn't think sun bears were real? Lester: Like I said, I have no clue. They probably just remembered it wrong. Or they're crazy. I can't think of any other reasons. Dr. Redfearn: Thank you for your time, Mr. █████

SCP-2012 is a collective designation that refers to the members of Legio IX Hispana, an Imperial Roman legion that disappeared from the historical record in the late 100's CE.

*** Item #: SCP-2012 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: At least one individual who is trained and fluent in speaking Vulgar Latin (the common language used during early Imperial Rome), must be on hand at all times to deal with SCP-2012. Said personnel is henceforth referred to as Alpha-1. Alpha-1 must be trained in Imperial Roman history, with a strong focus on military doctrine and tactics of the early Empire. In addition, one period-accurate set of lorica segmentata, forged using only methods available to Roman blacksmiths, is to be procured for the use of said personnel. A standard set of weaponry for an Imperial Auxilia cavalryman is to be provided, and forged with the same requirements as the armor. One horse with appropriate Roman cavalry accoutrements is to be provided. Alpha-1 is to receive lessons in Roman horsemanship, mainly in riding without a stirrup. Alpha-1 is to receive extensive lessons in Roman military history regarding the conquests of Britain in the 110's CE. Alpha-1 is to receive emblems and markings of Legio II Augusta1, including the reconstruction of the aquila2 of Legio II Augusta. Another individual, designated Alpha-2, is to receive the same equipment, but with a training focus on the Jewish revolts during the Principate, specifically the Bar Kochba Revolt. Alpha-2 is to receive the emblem and aquila of Legio X Gemina. A third individual, designated Alpha-3, is to receive the same equipment as the others, but with a training focus on the Parthian Empire wars of the 160's CE. Alpha-3 is to receive the emblems and aquila of Legio I Minervia. During the last week of February, Foundation personnel are to close off the region of Loch Lomond and the Trossachs National Park, Scotland where SCP-2012 can appear, using the cover story of wildlife surveys. The corresponding areas in the Negev Desert, Israel; and Khosrov State Reserve, Armenia; are to be monitored closely, due to the inability to close off such areas. At the beginning of a Marian Event, Alpha-1 is to ride to the position of SCP-2012, and claim to be a member of the Auxilia cavalry of Legio II Augusta. Alpha-1 is to claim that Legio II Augusta has been massacred in an ambush, and that the standing orders are for Legio IX Hispana to remain in their current position, and construct fortifications in preparation for a defense. Alpha-1 is ordered to use any means necessary to convince SCP-2012-1 of the necessity of this maneuver. If Alpha-1 does not return within the designated window of time of 10 hours, a Mobile Task Force will be deployed to contain SCP-2012 by force. The same procedure applies for Alpha-2 and Alpha-3, with the suitable adjustments in region and original legion. Regardless of the means of containment, surveillance of SCP-2012 during its appearance is to be maintained at all times. Description: SCP-2012 is a collective designation that refers to the members of Legio IX Hispana, an Imperial Roman legion that disappeared from the historical record in the late 100's CE. The reason for this disappearance from the historical record is currently still a matter of considerable debate. During the beginning of March, SCP-2012 can manifest in three different regions of the world: Loch Lomond and the Trossachs National Park, Scotland; Khosrov State Reserve, Armenia; and the Negev Desert, Israel. This is henceforth referred to as a Marian Event. During a Marian Event, members of SCP-2012 appear, often accompanied by the camp-followers and other personnel common to a Roman legion. The members of the legion will express considerable disorientation as to their location, but will reiterate their insistence that they are still in the late 100's CE. SCP-2012 instances will tend to be scattered, and can appear in multiple locations during one manifestation event, but instances are never repeated in the different locations in which SCP-2012 can manifest. SCP-2012-1 refers to █████████ ██████ ██████████, the commander of SCP-2012. Personnel engaging in containment of SCP-2012 are to make contact with SCP-2012-1 in order to convince SCP-2012 to remain in its position, or other suitable officers at the other locations in which SCP-2012-1 is not present. Approximately one week following the beginning of a Marian Event, it will abruptly disappear, taking any and all equipment with it. SCP-2012 can disappear at any time, and the members of it do not seem to be aware of this impending disappearance, or the general circumstances of their situation. Regardless of how many members are lost during containment, SCP-2012 will reappear every single year. SCP-2012 instances do not carry over memories from the prior year. Since the Foundation began containment of SCP-2012 in ████, the use of force has only been required in █ occasions. Cover stories were maintained on the grounds of military drilling. Addendum: The following is a relevant conversation in which Alpha-1 attempted to discover the origin of SCP-2012's anomalous nature. It has been translated from the original Vulgar Latin. SCP-2012-1: …but still, I feel strange. To be honest, a lot of the men haven't been feeling right. You know, I had a memory of fighting in Judaea, putting down Jews. Can you imagine that? I must be going insane. We've never been stationed anywhere near there, but yet, I clearly remember fighting there for some reason. Alpha-1: Perhaps it's the stress of the uprisings. SCP-2012-1: Aye, perhaps. I can't get an incident out of my head though. Some damned barbaric priests howling at us from atop their chariots as we went into battle. For some reason, I kept seeing them as Parthian heavy chariots, with those characteristic scythed blades. I had to blink a few times to get that vision out of my head. I don't understand what's going on. Alpha-1: I will make sure to put in a prayer for Asclepius for you, sir. During a different Marian Event, Alpha-2 was similarly ordered to discover the origin of SCP-2012. SCP-2012-1 had manifested in the Negev Desert, Israel, during this Marian Event. SCP-2012-1: And yet, I can't get it out of my head. Those accursed memories of being ambushed by a Pictish rebellion. We've never been stationed in Britannia. I can scarcely remember any information about Britannia, as I've never cared for reading about those other conquests. I can remember it so clearly though. Alpha-2: That is indeed odd, sir. SCP-2012-1: And you know what's the strangest thing? I couldn't stop seeing those Jewish zealots, and thinking of Parthian foot infantry. I've never seen Parthian foot infantry, but when I saw those soldiers, I couldn't stop thinking of how much they reminded me of the old Parthian wars. See, there I go again. I have no experience in the Parthian wars, but they seem to be old wars to me. We haven't even fought the Parthians since Trajan, but in those memories, it's not Trajan that's flying on those standards. It's some other emperor that I don't even recognize. Alpha-2: I will make sure to put in a prayer for Asclepius for you, sir. Footnotes 1. Second Augustan Legion 2. Roman standard/banner of an individual legion

SCP-815 is a novelty “snake nut can,” a common prank device that consists of a small canister labeled “Salted Mixed Nuts,” while in actuality it contains four cloth-covered springs (meant to represent "snakes") that fly out upon opening.

*** Item Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-815 requires no extraordinary containment procedures beyond a standard keypad-locked storage locker. Contact Doctor Meyers for access permissions. Under no circumstances should any non-class-D personnel open SCP-815. SCP-815 should be handled carefully as to prevent accidental activation. Description: SCP-815 is a novelty “snake nut can,” a common prank device that consists of a small canister labeled “Salted Mixed Nuts,” while in actuality it contains four cloth-covered springs (meant to represent "snakes") that fly out upon opening. X-ray and multi-spectral imaging have as yet determined no measurable unusual qualities of the can or "snakes". Upon opening, the "snakes" instantaneously vanish from the can and violently burst forth from the nearest person's (see note) face with extreme force. High-speed video footage reveals that the "snakes" appear to emerge from the lower sinuses, typically shattering the nose, cheekbones and upper jaw upon exiting. As a result, subjects often avoid major brain damage and remain alive until termination or death from blood loss/shock. After approximately fifteen seconds, the can re-seals itself and produces another four ordinary "snakes". The method by which the “snakes” achieve such extraordinary velocity without breaking is unknown. Note: Researchers are to be reminded that SCP-815 acts on the nearest person, even when opened by robot. I don't want to have to keep cleaning up these accidents, people. – Doctor Meyers

SCP-1821 is a male omnivorous teleost fish.

*** Item #: SCP-1821 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-1821 is to be contained in a steel-reinforced 12m by 12m by 7m seawater tank with a Calypso-class DOCC system. The tank is to be completely darkened, cooled to 4°C, and pressurized to 78.6 MPa. No visible light may enter SCP-1821's containment area. SCP-1821 may be observed with passive infrared. A tone generator loaded with a prepared digital library of musical sequences1 is to be placed in the containment chamber and connected by speaker and microphone to the tank for the purpose of communication with SCP-1821. On the first day of every month over the course of 24 hours, 70kg of shredded chum, raw shrimp and dead fish caught in the region of its recovery are to be fed to SCP-1821. Five days hence, any excess food is to be removed. Outside of authorized testing, SCP-1821 is not to be introduced to any living creature, especially those capable of bioluminescence. A reservoir is to be constructed near the Site which currently houses SCP-1821 according to the following specifications: cylindrical with a diameter of 140m, a depth of 10m, and filled with seawater. Airspace over the reservoir is restricted to helicams only. Residual knowledge of SCP-1821-2 in seafaring folklore is to be suppressed and discouraged. Description: SCP-1821 is a male omnivorous teleost fish. Genetic tests have confirmed the subject as a close relative of family Saccopharyngiformes (gulper eels). It is approximately 8m long and has a mass of 20kg. SCP-1821's small eyes possess white-reflecting retinal tapeta. Aside from its eyes and SCP-1821-1, SCP-1821's body has a 99.5% visible light absorption rate2. SCP-1821 does not appear to age to a significant degree, if at all. SCP-1821-1 is a lure resembling a human mouth and throat which extends from the end of SCP-1821's tail. SCP-1821 has voluntary control over the motion of SCP-1821-1 — it is capable of opening, closing and some vocalization, although it cannot speak. SCP-1821-1's lips, teeth and tongue glow with a soft pink light at most times and with a brighter red light when SCP-1821 is feeding. When exposed to any external source of light radiating in the visible range, SCP-1821 reacts by kissing it with SCP-1821-1. This act extinguishes and/or nullifies the emitted light. The light source will cease to function for the remainder of its existence. SCP-1821 may then attempt to consume the extinguished light source with its regular mouth. It is unknown whether or how SCP-1821 is capable of digesting the various objects it consumes; its spoor is typical of the Saccopharyngiformes family aside from size. Instances of SCP-1821-2 (formerly Fort-Class Extranormal Event RLM-19.39/64-RB) are a phenomenon which occur on or near the surface of the nearest body of water to SCP-1821 at least 20m from the shore. Instances of SCP-1821-2 take the form of a rapidly rotating, horizontal wheel of light measuring between 11m and 114m in diameter and between 3m and 8m in height. An instance of SCP-1821-2 occurs within 5 seconds of SCP-1821 extinguishing a light, and may last up to 10 minutes before descending into the water and dissipating. Solid matter cannot pass through instances of SCP-1821-2, as they effectively behave towards such as a grinding surface with an immeasurably high coefficient of abrasion. Fluids pass through instances of SCP-1821-2 easily. Before the recovery of SCP-1821, instances of SCP-1821-2 were thought to be an independent extranormal event with no discernible cause and were responsible for an unknown number of shipwrecks. Although SCP-1821 is not confirmed to be sapient, it is intelligent enough to have learned a system of several sequences of musical tones and to have associated them with objects and events to which it has been exposed. It successfully responds by imitating them with vocalizations from SCP-1821-1's mouth. This system enables communication and has been used by SCP-1821 in order to express primitive thoughts. 60% of its communications involve a desire for food; 30% involve a desire for being touched; 1% are solitary sustained notes with no clear meaning; the remaining 9% are expressions of simple emotion, usually sadness when it is not feeding. SCP-1821 seems to be unaware of the presence of researchers outside its tank; it tends to vocalize directly towards the tone generator's speaker. On 19██-██-██ in the ██████ ████, a trench in the █████ ████████ Ocean, 8 instances of SCP-1821-2 were reported within 1km of one another. SCP-1821 was recovered uninjured directly below at a depth of 8.2km. 8 deceased individuals of the same species as SCP-1821, all lacking instances of SCP-1821-1, were found in its immediate vicinity, as well as a small unidentified wooden wreckage. Cause of death was severe radiation damage. Footnotes 1. See Document 1821-919-Eta for information on how to request that a new musical sequence be added and taught to SCP-1821. 2. Based on results from tissue samples.

SCP-1997 is a single sheet of white paper folded into a booklet measuring 12cm x 20cm x 0.

*** Item #: SCP-1997 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-1997 is to be kept in a plastic sleeve and stored in a secure filing cabinet at Site-19. Photographic records of all known spreads of SCP-1997 are available for review to reduce unnecessary handling of SCP-1997. Personnel interested in attempting to solve any contents of SCP-1997 should submit a written request to Dr. Chambers. Description: SCP-1997 is a single sheet of white paper folded into a booklet measuring 12cm x 20cm x 0.5cm. The front cover features a brightly colored illustration depicting two children, a brown-haired boy and a blonde-haired girl, sliding along a Möbius strip twisted into a figure-eight, with a variety of planets, stars and other celestial objects in the background. The words "Dr. Wondertainment's Infinite Fun-Book™! The Wonders of SPACE!" fill the top third of the cover. The back cover features a block of text surrounded by a chain of anthropomorphic numbers and letters holding hands. Stuck inside on a rainy day? Getting ready for a long car trip? Open up Dr. Wondertainment's Infinite Fun-Book™ and stretch your brain into a new dimension! Puzzles, mazes, games and more await you inside Ever-Expanding™ pages! Science - Nature - History - Space - Art - Collect them all! You'll never run out of fun! Guaranteed!* *Guarantee is not legally binding. Testing has failed to reveal an upper limit to the number of times SCP-1997 can be unfolded. Despite how often SCP-1997 is unfolded, it continues to measure .5cm in depth, although the weight doubles each time. SCP-1997 can subsequently be refolded back to its original size, with any further folding resulting in normal behavior. No attempt to count the number of remaining pages has succeeded; humans invariably lose count and machines produce a variety of errors. Opening SCP-1997 reveals a black and white 2-page spread featuring a maze and instructions directing the reader to guide Astro Billy, a child in a domed helmet, to his rocket, avoiding various traps including aliens and a black hole. The maze has previously been completed using a green crayon. Further spreads can be accessed by unfolding SCP-1997 from bottom to top, then from right to left, continuing to alternate directions. Each action doubles the surface area of SCP-1997 and reveals additional activities which increase in size, complexity, and difficulty, many of which share the space exploration theme. Upon retrieval activities had been completed up to the 7th spread, using crayons, pencils and pens. Documented activities include: SCP-1997-3: A "Spot The Differences!" puzzle featuring an alien landscape. - Completed SCP-1997-28: Connecting Apollo astronauts to their respective missions. - Completed incorrectly SCP-1997-112: A crossword puzzle measuring 2m x 2m. - Partially completed SCP-1997-365: Unscrambling the names of 13 planets. These include the planets in our solar system as well as [REDACTED]. SCP-1997-874: A cryptogram message from "Commander Nova" containing 1987 characters that has yet to be deciphered by Foundation personnel. SCP-1997-1038: Connecting over 25,000 dots to draw engineering schematics for a Mars lander that matches no known prototype. Addendum 1: Several small tears presumably caused by SCP-1997's previous owner indicate that the subject is not indestructible. Excision of a 5cm x 5cm section of SCP-1997 from the 5th spread was approved. The extracted section did not retain SCP-1997's anomalous properties. Requests to attempt a complete penetration of SCP-1997 denied on the grounds that it could irreversibly negate SCP-1997's abilities. Addendum 2: SCP-1997 was brought to a secure airplane hangar and unfolded a total of 18 times, reaching an area of approximately 61m x 102m (.63ha). As size and weight increased upwards of 50 personnel were required to complete each unfolding, until space limitations prevented further progress. SCP-1997 retained its original thickness at each stage and was successfully folded back to its original size. Further testing in an outdoor location has been suspended until proper precautions against wind and other weather effects can be enacted.

SCP-1262 is a mass roughly 30cm in diameter that is made up of a green plant matter capable of highly accelerated growth when left in the presence of light, moisture, or organic tissue.

*** Item #: SCP-1262 Object Class: Keter Special Containment Procedures: SCP-1262 is to be kept in an indefinite dormant state at Storage Area-33 inside a cube of dry ice measuring 3m x 3m x 3m at 205 Kelvin (-68 degrees Celsius). The cube is to be suspended inside Silo-4. Two industrial-strength dehumidifiers will run continuously to sustain a dry environment within Silo-4. Neutron emitters will bathe the inside with radiation at all times to deter unwanted organics. Silo-4 is also to be filled with argon gas at standard atmospheric pressure. In the event of a catastrophic failure of the primary containment system or a breach in the cube itself, 6 pneumatic drills will extend from the walls and penetrate each face of the cube to deliver a powerful synthetic auxin (2,4,5-T) directly into SCP-1262. If this secondary system fails, 50% of Silo-4 will be filled with boiling paraquat and SCP-1262 will be released into the liquid. If this tertiary system fails, a series of controlled incendiary explosions using a combination of thermite, napalm, white phosphorus, and TNT will be used to suppress SCP-1262. In any case, Mobile Task Force Theta-4 (aka "Gardeners") will respond and remain onsite to provide additional security during the reestablishing/reconstruction of the containment system(s). At no time should water, water vapor, organic tissue, or visible light (with a frequency between 400-790 THz) be introduced into Silo-4. Outside of containment, SCP-1262 is extremely lethal in direct contact to organisms and should only be approached after being fully suppressed back into a dormant state. Description: SCP-1262 is a mass roughly 30cm in diameter that is made up of a green plant matter capable of highly accelerated growth when left in the presence of light, moisture, or organic tissue. Its surface area is composed of a dense covering of thin roots. These roots can spread outwards by growth and movement at a rate of 0.22 meters per second. SCP-1262's roots can reach up to a kilometer in length in order to seek water and mineral nourishment from the surrounding environment or from other living organisms. SCP-1262 has a rapid regenerative ability which makes it difficult to eradicate. SCP-1262 also has an innate resistance to most types of radiation, extreme temperatures, and extreme pressures. However, extreme temperature (>1,470 Kelvin or <213 Kelvin) or large amounts of aggressive herbicides seem to be the most effective suppression methods. Currently there is no known method to fully exterminate SCP-1262. If left unchecked, SCP-1262 will grow to form complex structures. These structures are supported by hardened cellulose fiber and lignin wax plating formed in hexagonal patterns. These structures also include defensive/offensive biological mechanisms that range anywhere from pneumatically discharged calcium carbonate flechettes to hallucinogenic fume releasing pods. Inside these structures, SCP-1262 is able to produce many independently functioning organic systems for capturing and converting the ambient environment on an enormous scale. Please review Incident 1262-2010-4.2 summary for further information on SCP-1262 activity and threat level.1 Timeline Summary of Incident 1262-2010-4.2: 04/12/2010 Dr. ███████ (a prominent vulcanologist) and his assistant were collecting samples on the Eyjafjallajökull ice cap in Iceland when they inadvertently unearthed SCP-1262 from the dense ice. Dr. ███████ asked his assistant to retrieve it. As the assistant came into physical contact with SCP-1262, he was quickly engulfed and absorbed by aggressive overgrowth resulting in death within seconds. Dr. ███████ escaped back to his vehicle and reported to the local authorities. Local law enforcement arrived hours later to find a thick tree like structure growing. Three of the officers were entangled and absorbed by roots underneath them and another was killed by a toxic aerosol. The only surviving individual did not report the incident, but fled the country instead where he was later detained overseas. SCP-1262 grew substantially and virtually unnoticed for the next 12 hours. 04/13/2010 By 4:00am, SCP-1262 had grown into a hardened cellulose based structure covering almost 20,000m2 with three prominent towers each roughly 100m tall. At the base, a collection of gaseous bladders each inflating and deflating independently were scattered around the center mass, along with thick roots that penetrated deep into the ice. The structure was processing ambient air and other nutrients into heated carbon monoxide, which was being exhaled out of the structure’s towers as thick clouds. Two nearby towns evacuated after fifty people died from inhalation. By 12:30pm, two more towers had sprouted and the entire structure had increased in size by 160%. The SCP Foundation was then notified and a perimeter/media blackout was established to protect civilians. Mobile Task Force Sigma-9 (aka "Valkyries") was called in with Level 5 clearance to lay down suppressing fire around SCP-1262 using air to ground bunker busters with █████████ warheads. 04/14/2010 First volley of the air strike began at 1:00am and was successful in penetrating the ice cap over the dormant volcano. SCP-1262 became trapped in the collapsing caldera for a short while. During that time, three aircraft are destroyed by SCP-1262. A second volley was aimed directly at the center mass of the structure. The subsequent explosions were able to destabilize the volcano underneath to the point of triggering a violent eruption as planned. A final airstrike of bombing raids was made in the surrounding areas of the Eyjafjallajökull ice cap, effectively demolishing the towns of ██████████ and █████████ along with ██████████████ of witnesses █████████████ campsite. The entire site was closely monitored to ensure that it had been successfully incinerated in the eruption. All public knowledge of the incident was expunged and the airspace of 20 nearby countries were subsequently closed off until further notice until atmospheric ash samples confirmed a complete neutralization. ██/██/20██ Flight ████ crashed into an isolated area of Greenland while traveling from Reykjavík, Iceland. Intercepted transmissions before the crash gave a strong indication that SCP-1262 was involved. Upon further investigation of the wreckage, the tail section which had broken off in mid air was found covered in SCP-1262’s overgrowth. Still in early stages of development, SCP-1262 was quickly suppressed and had the surrounding layers of growth stripped off. SCP-1262 was then taken directly to Area-33 for indefinite storage. Footnotes 1. All information on SCP-1262 is based on observations in the field and the surviving witnesses' accounts during the Iceland Incident. Future research is planned when safer containment procedures can be developed.

SCP-3443 is a designation within the SCP Foundation database which serves as a placeholder for a class of hypothetical anomalous phenomena.

*** Item #: SCP-3443 Object Class: N/A Special Containment Procedures: Owing to its complete non-existence, no containment procedures for SCP-3443 have ever existed. Protocol 00-Null Engram is in place to manage any hypothetical SCP-3443 instances. The existence of this protocol is in no way an assertion of the possible existence of any such phenomenon. In accordance with Protocol 00-Null Engram, should evidence suggesting the existence of SCP-3443 ever be discovered it is of vital importance that it be ignored completely and no action or investigation taken in response. Even vague or circumstantial evidence is to be disregarded entirely regardless of source or type. This directive applies to all personnel regardless of rank, clearance, assignment, or any other considerations. Any individuals, Foundation personnel or otherwise, who indicate any belief in SCP-3443 or demonstrate a clear propensity towards such belief, are to be immediately reported to Taskforce 03-Macaque. Taskforce 03-Macaque is trained to administer Frobisher-Gladstone personality restructuring (use of class D, E, and F Amnestics authorized as necessary) as a precautionary measure. No research or investigation has been or is to be undertaken into any SCP-3443 candidate beyond those measures necessary for supporting the ability of the Foundation to comply with Protocol 00-Null Engram, such as ensuring integrity of this database entry and maintenance of Taskforce 03-Macaque. Description: SCP-3443 is a designation within the SCP Foundation database which serves as a placeholder for a class of hypothetical anomalous phenomena. The designation describes any memetic or cognitohazardous phenomenon or entity which in some way asserts an impossibility for knowledge about itself to either exist or be expressed. This could be by either direct interference with any knowledge relating to itself or prevention by some means of any communication regarding itself. It is the unequivocal position of the SCP Foundation that no phenomena of this type exist, however due to their nature confirmed total non-existence is insufficient reason not to deploy general safeguards against them. Although multiple entirely mutually unrelated phenomena of this type could exist (rather than the none which do), only a single designation will be allocated. Given that no specific real instances could ever be described in any detail, no reason exists for reserving additional designations. It is hypothesized that the existence of any knowledge of such a phenomenon, given that it would be a memetic cognitohazard of some kind, could have possible consequences including but not limited to: Inability of any person to acquire or to retain such knowledge Replacement of any expression of such knowledge with unrelated information Replacement of any expression of such knowledge with a direct denial of that knowledge Inability for any person holding such knowledge to continue to exist or have existed Inability for any form of information regarding any person holding such knowledge to be perceived Various AK-class end-of-the-world scenarios Various CK-class restructuring scenarios The above examples are purely conjecture and serve only to illustrate the importance that containment of such a phenomenon might have if any existed. The exact criteria to qualify as knowledge of any SCP-3443 candidate that would trigger these effects cannot be known exactly. It can only be inferred that non-specific suspicion, such as the mere suggestion that such phenomena might exist, is insufficient to initiate the effects of any extant SCP-3443. As no SCP-3443 instances exist, this inference is of little value. Addendum: "Honestly what do we even have this entry for? It has never been Foundation policy to devote resources to managing problems which don't exist, we have more than enough trouble trying to keep up with things which can't exist but do… Wow, it seems that even the person who put this here doesn't want to be associated with it. I think this might be the first entry in the database I've ever seen without any mention of previous researchers or even account names listed in the edit history. I guess it makes sense that no-one wants to admit to this garbage though. And what's this Taskforce it's talking about? I'm not sure it even exists, but if it does… are we seriously employing people for this crap?" - Dr ████████ Dr ████████ has submitted a formal request that database entry for SCP-3443 be reviewed for deletion and expungement from all archives, along with review of any associated divisions or taskforces. "Staff are reminded that while requests to either modify Foundation archives outside normal editing channels or dissolve assets can be made, they are taken extremely seriously and only to be used where necessary. Wasting O5 time by ironically tricking the submission form into accepting an unsigned request to make a complaint about anonymous edits and wastage of Foundation resources is completely unacceptable conduct. This incident will be investigated. As SCP-3443 does not exist, however, the request for deletion will still be considered. Entry for SCP-3443 will remain for the time being pending the outcome of that review, until then the 00-Null Engram protocol will remain in force. This will include the continued use of personality restructuring as prescribed. All staff are reminded that no instances of SCP-3443 exist and that all containment procedures are to be followed entirely." - O5-███ + Audit team please read!!! - Audit team please read!!! Ok guys, so whatever messed up the edit log seems to be wreaking havok with any links in or out of this article. I've reported the issue to the I.T. guys, might take a couple weeks before they get to it though, so for now keep group notes on Audit Case #-3443-Felis-Defamiliaris here. We'll transfer them across when they get it fixed. For now, preliminary work assignments are as follows: Procedural Compliance: Tania Precedent Review: Jacob (as usual, speak to me before requesting any 4/5 info) Containment Site Inspection: N/A Taskforce 03-Macaque Inspection: ███████ File-To-Date Review: No-one for now, will put someone on it once IT is done Cost/Benefit Review: ████ ██████ ████████ Level-4 Review Officer, Designations Authority Office + DB_workID#-3443-04 - DB_workID#-3443-04 Ongoing corruption confirmed, remains highly unpredictable. Had assigned ████ to work on it and now ███ own profile is missing, I will be taking over personally now. Even the original service ticket is corrupted, can't even see who submitted the damn thing. In any case it looks like the Audit guys have the right idea, we'll keep notes within the article as well. ████████ ███ Database Analyst, Archives Integrity Management + Audit Case #-3443-Felis-Defamiliaris - Audit Case #-3443-Felis-Defamiliaris Okay so I've still only heard back from 2 of you with an update. I understand that this isn't our top priority but at least report back every week or 2. Full summary will be in Audit case archives once I hear from all of you, or here if system issues remain ongoing by then. ██████ ████████ Level-4 Review Officer, Designations Authority Office + DB_workID#-3443-04 - DB_workID#-3443-04 Data corruption is getting pretty bad here, still not sure what's causing it. If I didn't have 15 years of dealing with lazy coding behind me I'd swear this is starting to feel like a scip at work. Hell we're weeks in and we still can't even find where the problem is, maybe I really have met real paracode at last instead of just hearing it as an excuse… anomalous computer virus with a sense of humor maybe? Oh who am I kidding, it's just an idiotic mistake someone made years ago. It's always an idiot. In any case this situation is getting to be a problem, the corruption is totally wiping linked accounts at random, I've lost touch with half my team now. I'm thinking we need to pull the article from the main archive and all active backups and just fix it up in quarantine. We'll work on fixing it there where it won't do any damage. We can copy it back afterwards if they decide they even want it. Request has been made to all 5 of the relevant O5 IT sub-committee requesting the change. O5-██ and O5-███ seem in favor, O5-██ and O5-12 haven't responded. We'll hear back soon I hope, until then carry on as before. ████████ ███ Database Analyst, Archives Integrity Management + ATTN: Audit and Archives staff! - ATTN: Audit and Archives staff! All work on SCP-3443 is suspended until further notice. Audit Case #-3443-Felis-Defamiliaris and DB_workID#-3443-04 are now closed. A detachment from Taskforce 03-Macaque will interview all remaining staff assigned to either case, please cooperate with them fully. No further investigations are to be conducted except if clear instructions are received from the O5 council. O5-12 + DB_workID#-3443-05 CONTAINMENT FAILURE Please disregard this. Accidentally created when revisiting DB_workID#-3443-04. Hadn't seen O5 directive, wish it had come sooner, I'm sick of this one… Still not sure what all the fuss is about anyway, whole damn scip isn't even real. ████████ ███ Database Analyst, Archives Integrity Management WARNING: You are in breach of SCP-3443 containment protocols Your account details and location have been logged in accordance with Protocol 00-Null Engram. A retrieval team from Taskforce 03-Macaque has been dispatched to your location, please cooperate fully with them. We assure you that Frobisher-Gladstone personality restructuring is extremely safe, only in 2.3% of cases are amnestics of any kind required, and overall success rates are now above 99.8%. It will reassure you to know that no evidence of any SCP-3443-type phenomena has ever been observed. Although of course this can never be proved, the continued existence of you and many others before you while in a state of strong suspicion or belief in the existence of SCP-3443 strong enough to defy Foundation directives is a good sign. Use of the SCP-3443 entry has been granted to Taskforce 03-Macaque of the Foundation anti-memetic division by approval of the O5 council to assist with carrying out Protocol 00-Null Engram. This protocol exists to improve overall procedural compliance and anti-memetic resistance across the Foundation. On the off chance any SCP-3443 does exist, it's probably helping us against that too. Please spend the next few minutes preparing a brief written summary of any critical duties that had been required of you over the coming days, restructuring may take up to 2 weeks to complete and this will ensure any impact from this disruption to your work is minimized. If it is impossible for any of your duties to be handled by another person you may discuss the issue with the Taskforce commander, however their directives must be followed. Lastly yes, this measure is being taken because you have failed to comply with direct instructions regarding handling evidence of SCP-3443-type phenomena, however we assure you that it is not a punishment. No mark will appear on any records apart from a classified 00-Null Engram completion report and you will remain a valued Foundation asset. Curiosity is a part of human nature and we do not expect you to have full control over it, that's our job. - Dr. Tania Gladstone, SCP Foundation Anti-Memetics Division Director of Taskforce 03-Macaque

SCP-1705 is a collection of 2,507 bones of various origin and composition.

*** Item #: SCP-1705 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: All instances of SCP-1705 and SCP-1705-A are to be kept in Containment Lockers #115 through #246 at Site 23. Assembly of and direct contact with SCP-1705 and SCP-1705-B is restricted to D-Class personnel and must be presided over by two Level 3 personnel at all times. All instances of SCP-1705-A are to be photographed and filed appropriately in Cabinet #533 of the Records Room of Site 23. Personnel are to refer to the photographs of SCP-1705-A for reference in testing rather than the tablets themselves if possible. Description: SCP-1705 is a collection of 2,507 bones of various origin and composition. Many instances of SCP-1705 are identical in shape and size. All instances have been physically altered with notches and protrusions for the apparent purpose of accommodating separate instances of SCP-1705. These bones can be assembled in a variety of ways by following diagramming that is etched onto instances of SCP-1705-A. When assembled according to the diagrams, SCP-1705 instances will begin to rapidly produce tissues that act to create usable tools, machines, and inventions, forming an instance of SCP-1705-B.1 Foundation-produced materials attempting to imitate SCP-1705 have had no effect when assembled in a manner consistent with instances of SCP-1705. SCP-1705-A is a series of stone tablets diagramming pictorial instructions on assembling SCP-1705. The tablets depict instances of SCP-1705 of particular shape, without marks that could be used to identify a specific bone; as such, any instance of SCP-1705 matching the depiction can be substituted into the design. There are currently 142 1072 instances of SCP-1705-A contained by the Foundation. Instances of SCP-1705-A are not inherently anomalous. SCP-1705-B-001 through SCP-1705-B-142 refer to the constructs created by assembling SCP-1705 instances correctly according to an SCP-1705-A instance. All instances are composed of tissues normally found in terrestrial fauna.3 All modifications done to an instance of SCP-1705-B constructed using a specific subset of SCP-1705 appear to remain over time and do not change after repeated disassemblies and reconstruction. Such examples of this include damage to an iteration of SCP-1705, graffiti, and bodily fluids. SCP-1705 and SCP-1705-A were recovered on 14/06/2000 at at 39.7████ N. 11.5████ E by Mobile Task Force Sigma-5 (aka "Sinkronized Swimmers") in the Mediterranean Sea. All objects were found on the seabed, with approximately 350 instances of SCP-1705 and 250 instances of SCP-1705-A deemed unusable or illegible. Ruins resembling structures similar to those of the first century Roman Empire were prevalent at the site of recovery, but deemed irretrievable. Among the debris found at the location were numerous excerpts of writing in a currently unknown language. Foundation linguistics experts are currently working on translation. The Foundation currently speculates that an ancient civilization originally native to the area of discovery constructed and utilized all known instances of SCP-1705. Test Log-1705-Upsilon: The following is an amended testing log of the various forms of SCP-1705-B constructed by following the diagramming on SCP-1705-A instances. SCP-1705-B Apparent Function of Results Researcher Notes SCP-1705-B-054 Fountain The anomaly produces a currently unknown liquid continually at a rate of 4L per minute, which is collected in a basin that is able to hold approximately 12L of liquid at a time. The liquid has been revealed to be highly addictive and toxic. SCP-1705-B-071 Unknown Incendiary device Given the apparent superficial similarities of SCP-1705-B-071 through SCP-1705-B-088, testing will be done to discover the function of all three. SCP-1705-071 has been determined to be an incendiary explosive. Due to the greater proportion of the materials of these instances in comparison to the remainder of SCP-1705, the Foundation has deduced that SCP-1705-B-071 through SCP-1705-B-088 were originally designed to be easy to make and readily replaceable. SCP-1705-B-071 is activated by noises louder than 90 dB. When exposed to such conditions, SCP-1705-B-071 ignites for approximately 7 seconds, then explodes, often destroying its composite materials in the process. Usage of an instance SCP-1705-B-071 typically damages the instances of SCP-1705 that comprise, rendering those bones and that instance of SCP-1705-B-071 unusable. SCP-1705-B-090 Communications Device SCP-1705-B-090 appears to be constructed in a way that mimics a humanoid CNS. The device is approximately 1m by 0.5 m by 1.75 m. Attached to SCP-1705-B-090 is an input device and a module for housing recorded media. The front of the device itself houses a screen, which is assumed to project the media onto the screen; however, at the time of writing, no currently viewable media is available for the device. Multiple instances of SCP-1705-B-090 are able to communicate between each other. SCP-1705-B-099 Sedative The anomaly appears to be a spherical object with roughly circular openings and a slow-burning fuse approximately 0.5m long made out of lipids. The testing of the interior has revealed marijuana resin coating the interior of the construct. SCP-1705-B-121 through SCP-1705-B-142 Unknown See Test Log-1705-Chi All objects appear to be too large to construct within the confines of Site 53 at the time. Research is postponed on these instances until a suitable location is decided on. Test Log-1705-Chi: A suitable location was found to be appropriate for the apparent size for testing SCP-1705-B-121 through SCP-1705-B-142 at Area 14. SCP-1705-B Apparent Function of Results Researcher Notes SCP-1705-B-121 Temple SCP-1705-B-121 appears to be a place for religious observation. It can be speculated that the idolistic figures depicted near the entrance of the construct are what this civilization worshipped. Furthermore, the structure appears to have been desecrated with graffiti depicting obscene and lewd activities, as well as fragments from what can be assumed to be instances of SCP-1705-B-071 embedded in the various parts of the wall. SCP-1705-B-122 through SCP-1705-B-142 Homes All instances of SCP-1705-B-122 through SCP-1705-B-142 appear to be housing units for the SCP-1705 civilization. Each building is equipped with an instance of SCP-1705-B-054 in some way, often attached to receptacles that store any overflow. Instances of SCP-1705-B-090 have been found in the majority of the homes with accompanying media. When shown through the screen of SCP-1705-B-090, the media depict subjects adorned with attire similar to that of the ancient Roman Empire during the first century engaging in various displays of power4. Addendum-1705-Psi: On 04/06/2001, during a secondary exploration of the seabed where SCP-1705 was originally discovered, Foundation agents recovered two additional instances of SCP-1705-A and proceeded to assemble SCP-1705 instances in accordance with the diagrams. SCP-1705-B Apparent Function of Results Researcher Notes SCP-1705-B-143 Meeting Hall SCP-1705-B-143 manifested with assorted flyers posted along all the walls, all of which apparently displayed similar messages. The majority of the flyers were written in several languages currently unknown to the Foundation; however, researchers were able to locate versions of these flyers written in Latin and Greek. The majority of the text revealed the location they were recovered from to be called "Island of Atlas." SCP-1705-B-090-1 Video Recordings SCP-1705-B-090-1 are a series of video recordings that are playable via instances of SCP-1705-B-090. The language spoken in the video are is currently unidentified, but appear to be a composite of spoken Greek, Latin, and several unknown languages. See Video Log-1705-Omega for details. Video Log-1705-Omega: 00:00 - Scene shows the remnants of a battlefield, focusing on a group of men standing on innumerable corpses. All persons are armed with various weaponry that appear to be SCP-1705-B instances and stand tall. In the background, unknown instances of SCP-1705-B roughly resembling tanks move across the field. 00:13 - Pans to shot of smaller, younger group of male individuals sitting of to the side, laughing and carelessly handling their weapons. 00:17 - Pans back to the larger group. Most of the group is now laughing at a few of the men, who in turn appear to be embarrassed. 00:20 - Picture freezes and fades to grayscale. A voice begins speaking. 00:25 - Video shows the men that were previously laughed at speaking angrily to the younger group. The younger group are all frantically moving around and putting belonging in sacks. 00:32 - All of the younger group are shown on a boat arriving on an island. The island is inhabited entirely by young males, who greet the arrivals by handing them glasses full of what appears to be the liquid from SCP-1705-B-054 and drink heavily before being escorted to a location identified as SCP-1705-B-121. 00:48 - Scene is now at night. All boys are shouting, throwing instances of SCP-1705-B-099, and watching them explode in the night. The video shifts focus from the boys to the explosions. 00:57 - Fade to scene of the men that were previously speaking angrily. All men are smiling and greeting women. Camera fades to black after focusing on a specific laughing couple. A ten character long series of Roman numerals flashes on the screen for ten seconds following. 00:00 - Scene appears to be a training ground. A man and boy are shown. The boy waves towards the viewer and the man strikes the boy on the back of the head and points off-screen. 00:03 - Video pans to where the man pointed. There appears to be a featureless humanoid attached to the ground by a long stake. The man hands the boy a spear and speaks to him, pointing at the humanoid with the spear. 00:08 - Boy attempts to throw the spear at the figure; the spear fails to reach it. Laughter is heard. 00:10 - Man strikes the boy again, takes the weapon out of his hand, and begins shouting at him. The boy starts crying. 00:13 - Man waves a flyer in the face of the boy. The view zooms in and reveal it is identical ones found in SCP-1705-B-143. 00:17 - Boy continues crying as man escorts him towards a vehicle and they get in. 00:24 to 23:45 - Driving. The environment appears typical of that found in the area of the Mediterranean Sea during the first century. Neither party speaks during the trip. 23:46 - Man and boy gets out of the car. Video follows the boy as he walks to a boat. Camera pans back over to the man. Man smiles, nods, and gets back into the vehicle. Video ends. Footnotes 1. See Test Log-1705-Upsilon for an abridged list of SCP-1705-B instances. 2. 35 instances of SCP-1705-A were lost during testing of SCP-1705-B-071. Testing must not continue in the presence of tablets to ensure the greatest possible retainment of SCP-1705-A instances. 3. Notable examples of this include the use of keratin for walls and lipids for fuels. 4. Notable examples of these displays include excessive drinking from SCP-1705-B-054, sitting in a roughly circular formation and passing SCP-1705-B-099 around, and wrestling.

SCP-504 is a specialized instance of SCP-2941 is ongoing.

*** Item #: SCP-2941 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: All known instances of SCP-2941 are to be kept within separate and fully-isolated bio-containment chambers within Biological Containment Site-103. Instances should be provided with four to six hours of direct light from an overhead fluorescent. Each instance of SCP-2941 must be checked at least four times a day to confirm that specimen morale levels fall within mandated guidelines (for more information see Document 2941-M-5). Any measurements of specimen morale levels falling above standard containment parameters should be reported immediately to the current project head. Should standard demoralization acts prove insufficient, please consult Document 2941-DM-1 for Stage B countermeasures. Since Incident 2941-3-2, interaction with SCP-2941 is limited to researchers with Level 3 clearance. Additionally, transport of SCP-2941 instances to and from other Site-103 research wings must be carried out in pre-approved routes free of Foundation personnel traffic. Description: SCP-2941 is the collective designation for an anomalous population of fruits and vegetables. Instances of SCP-2941 only superficially resemble their non-anomalous counterparts, and differ from non-anomalous fruits and vegetables in both behavior and growth patterns. SCP-2941 instances possess limited sensory awareness, are capable of locomotion, and furthermore, some have shown the ability to speak, though how SCP-2941 instances manage to vocalize is currently unknown. Under optimal containment conditions, the physical size of each instance of SCP-2941 conforms to the average size of comparable specimens in its particular species. However, rapid growth will occur when any instance of SCP-2941 is presented with verbal and/or physical affection as well as any other kind of positive reinforcement. Instances will also exhibit this property when engaging in pleasurable activities. No upper bound of SCP-2941's enlargement has been shown through on-site testing and by Foundation computer modeling. Proper demoralization must be maintained on a regular basis as any instance left alone for a period of between three to five hours will begin growing at a noticeable rate. Foundation researchers have hypothesized that each instance of SCP-2941 has an innate highly positive self-image that must be countered at all times. Addendum A: List of currently-contained SCP-2941 instances.1 Instance Designations Instance Specifics Special Notes SCP-2941-1 Red Delicious apple (Malus domestica) Primary pleasure vector involved rolling around in a circular path within its containment cell until researchers were able to convince SCP-2941-1 that any movement at all will awaken a massive parasitic worm living inside it. It should continue to be made clear that removing the worm from -1 is simply beyond the Foundation's capabilities. SCP-2941-2 Fennel (Foeniculum vulgare) Main morale boost comes from engaging in the popular children's game "Peek-a-boo" by being placed underneath a piece of fabric large enough to completely cover it, and then having the fabric quickly pulled away. Tests have shown that SCP-2941-2's greatest demoralization occurs when the fabric is simply left covering -2 and no attempt is made to assist while it tries to roll free. The longest time to date that -2 has been trapped beneath the fabric is sixteen days which, as test models predicted, coincided with record low morale. SCP-2941-3 Honeydew melon (Cucumis melo) Is very quick to notice nearby individuals, and will repeatedly vocalize questions regarding the quality of its roundness. To minimize misunderstanding on SCP-2941-3's part, researchers must be sure to always respond to each query with the statement "You are a hideous cube." SCP-2941-4 Cavendish banana (Musa acuminata) Compulsively attempts to show off its ability to balance vertically on its stem. SCP-2941-4 should always be contained within a bio-chamber specifically modified with a floor that constantly pivots up and down at random angles and direction, preventing -4 from balancing. SCP-2941-5 Green pepper (Capsicum annuum) Regularly vocalizes concerns about the well-being of the rest of the SCP-2941 instances. SCP-2941-5 is to always be told that all the other specimens have made it clear to Foundation personnel that they wish -5 would mind its own business and that its consideration is unwanted. SCP-2941-6 Persian lime (Citrus × latifolia) SCP-2941-6's morale has been shown to markedly increase when placed in a silent containment cell. Researchers are to do hourly checks to confirm that the speaker placed within -6's current bio-chamber is functioning correctly and that the audio file chosen by the current head researcher is playing on an uninterrupted loop at a minimum of 90db. At the time of writing, the sound of a knife scraping a glass bottle has been playing for eighty-four days. SCP-2941-7 Turnip (Brassica rapa) Has expressed repeated desire to only be referred to as "Terry". Foundation personnel are expressly forbidden from doing so, but if absolutely necessary, they should refer to SCP-2941-7 directly, condescendingly, and repeatedly as any other name besides Terry. Names producing the most severe demoralization vectors so far include "Ferguson", "Wingding" and "Budz". SCP-2941-8 Button mushrooms (2) (Agaricus bisporus) As this pair has shown to prefer close visual contact, each separate SCP-2941-8 instance should be kept in detached, opaque chambers a minimum of 4m apart. If the situation requires, researchers are allowed to converse with the -8 instances separately, with a sole focus on pointing out how the other member of the pair had been given the opportunity to be placed back together but voluntarily and happily turned it down. SCP-2941-9 Peach (Prunus persica) Has often expressed displeasure with all forms of physical contact by Foundation researchers. Any researcher involved with the study of SCP-2941-9 should mark on Form 9C how many times they were able to flick -9 with their finger throughout their work shift. SCP-2941-10 Cantaloupe (Cucumis melo) Has a predilection for wanting to tell jokes to Foundation staff. Morale reduction has been maximized by initiating Procedure 2941-10-α, which dictates that SCP-2941-10 be allowed to tell any joke it wishes, but should be addressed immediately afterwards with angrily-delivered comments regarding how poorly the joke was constructed and/or how -10 has profoundly hurt the joke recipient's feelings. SCP-2941-11 Eggplant (Solanum melongena) As long as SCP-2941-11 has been under the Foundation's care, it has repeatedly vocalized only one sentence, without variation: "Hoo boo, I love you." -11's morale has, through much experimentation, shown to decrease the most when addressed with the carefully enunciated response: "You should be hurled into the trash." Incident 2941-3-2: Due to a sudden and substantial water leak from Site-103's Antarctic Gardens, one floor directly above SCP-2941-3's containment cell, a decision was made by Junior Researcher Metcalf to temporarily move SCP-2941-3 to an empty research room down the hall. At the same time, testing had just finished for the day with SCP-████ and ten Class D personnel. As the remaining seven were being led back to the on-site Class D barracks, they passed Metcalf transporting SCP-2941-3 the opposite way down the same corridor. Ignoring established Transport Silence Protocols, D-34987 was later heard from recovered surveillance camera system data to call out loudly, "Hey baby, those're some nice round melons you got there!" Junior Researcher Metcalf, the seven Class D personnel, the two Security Officers leading them, and thirteen other nearby Foundation site staff were instantly crushed when SCP-2941-3 underwent the most rapid growth ever recorded by an SCP-2941 instance. Establishing morale levels low enough to re-contain SCP-2941-3 took eight hours and updated containment procedures were immediately put into effect. Footnotes 1. Investigation into whether SCP-504 is a specialized instance of SCP-2941 is ongoing.

SCP-2508 is a cottage-style house of indeterminate location, as well as its .

*** Item #: SCP-2508 Object Class: None Special Containment Procedures: Due to its unusual nature, containment efforts for SCP-2508 are to be focused on its upkeep, research regarding its origin and significance, and maintaining its routines. The current resident is to add their name to the logbook, along with their Foundation ID and occupation. SCP-2508-1 is to be filled every day at noon, and should be inspected for cracks or leaks on a monthly basis, with repairs being made accordingly. The hatch in front of SCP-2508-2 is to be closed during bad weather and all of winter. SCP-2508 is to be kept in good condition. The archives are to be kept organized at all times. Please note that all necessities such as food and medication are restocked daily. Additionally, the current resident is to record any and all findings they come across regarding SCP-2508. They are also encouraged to catalog any other thoughts, experiences, and/or dreams they deem relevant. It is imperative that these records be concise. Incomplete data and fragments of information are also acceptable, including any knowledge pertaining to fields of study that may be useful to future residents. The current resident is to attempt to maintain a mental state of well-being. For more information on the subject, see the study. Finally, at all times, an up to date version of this document is to be kept within a laminated slot located on the table by the door. Description: SCP-2508 is a cottage-style house of indeterminate location, as well as its .53 km2 of surrounding property. The house has two main floors, not including its one basement and attic. The manner in which SCP-2508 is discovered by an individual is always unintentional, and past residents have noted coming across the house at varying addresses in separate towns, different countries, and under wildly dissimilar circumstances. Both SCP-2508's builders and original inhabitants (if it can be presumed there were any) are unknown at this time. Only one person is capable of being inside SCP-2508 at a time. As an individual enters, however, they will become incapable of leaving. The reason for this comes from the fact that as one exits the property of SCP-2508 on one end, they will find themselves arriving at the other end. This looping - or recursive - geographical space is what prevents escape from SCP-2508. At this point the reader may be growing aware of the implications of what has just been described. It should be clarified that - as escape from SCP-2508 is impossible, and SCP-2508 is not believed to have any real world location - sending information to the outside world is not a possibility. Barring an unforeseen scenario, all material regarding SCP-2508, including this document, is confined within SCP-2508 itself. Therefore, if you are reading this document, you are now the current resident of SCP-2508. All of your duties to The Foundation of the outside world are (unofficially) null and void. The current working theory is that The Foundation at large has no knowledge of this place whatsoever. The information presented in this document has not been subject to review by The Foundation as a whole, but instead is the culmination of each individual Foundation member who has lived and died in the isolation of SCP-2508. Herein lies more unexplained characteristics of SCP-2508. All recorded past residents have been Foundation personnel of clearance level 1 or higher. The reason for this remains unclear, but research suggests that (judging from water levels of SCP-2508-1 when new residents arrive) if a resident of SCP-2508 dies, they are replaced by a new resident within the same day. Depending on your predecessor's cause of death, you may have some cleaning up to do1. SCP-2508-1 hide SCP-2508-1. SCP-2508-1 is a wood and metal pump-like device in the attic. The machine has a height of 1 m and is affixed to the floor. Water put into the machine is pumped throughout the day to an unknown location via a series of six small PVC pipes that run from the bottom end of the machine to a small hole in the wall. If fully filled, SCP-2508-1 will drain in approximately 30 hours. A plaque built into the device contains the following written passage: Please fill this machine once per day at noontime. We cannot arrive with as much haste if the machine runs dry. We hope you understand, and trust that you will keep your side of the arrangement now that we have kept ours. Thank you. Failing to fill the machine as instructed appears to have degenerative effects on both SCP-2508 and the individual who lives there. Allowing the device to remain empty for a prolonged period of time is believed to be fatal2. It is advised that you heed the instruction. SCP-2508-2 hide SCP-2508-2 (hatch not pictured). SCP-2508-2 designates the patch of organic material in the basement. The material is of green coloration with small amounts of red and purple hues. It is not of any known species of plant. This material will photosynthesize if allowed sunlight through a hatch (due to the structure of the basement, this hatch is placed slightly above ground level), and will occasionally bloom with blue flowers. Some have reported hearing a static sound coming from the object, or a faint red glow coming off of it in intermittent pulses. Translated from Morse code, these pulsations read: Thanks for keeping the plants fed. Hit a snag in traffic, might take a bit longer than expected. Like with SCP-2508-1, the hatch for SCP-2508-2 also has a plaque on it. Its text has been provided below. Please keep this hatch open only in good weather. Please keep it closed for rain, snow, and the chill of winter. Thank you. Addendum: The record archive in the study has proven to be the most efficient way for cataloging and compiling research for future residents. However, a miscellaneous section was also added at some point3 to record the thoughts of those trapped here. You may feel free to read up on your predecessors. Provided below is an example intended to prime you for your stay here. Show Excerpt hide "I was driving home when it happened. It was about a 30 minute commute through a lot of back roads, and I was terribly drunk. It was one of those "XK Class Scenario averted, let's celebrate" occasions, so I didn't really hesitate to down more than my fair share of wine. When I arrived at my front porch, car askew so that the front tires dug into the dirt on my front lawn, I stumbled for the door. After a great amount of fidgeting I managed to to get my key in the lock, and finally got the door open. But then when I looked around, it wasn't my house at all. It was this place. Dumbfounded, I went back outside. Surely, I thought, I had accidentally entered another house in my drunken stupor. But now not even the outside was as expected. The suburban-urban environment had shifted to a countryside. My car was still there, sitting on the asphalt road which was now a dirt road. Everything was different, and it was never quite the same. That was all 23 years ago. No doubt my position as O5 was replaced long, long ago, and here I am, having found startlingly few answers. Every once in a while I'll find an old shoe or a photograph of someone who came before me, and I am reminded how we are all chained together in an oblivious and obligatory service to this place. Lately the clouds keep rolling in, and the plants in the basement are buzzing more than usual. I hear the gurgling of water draining through the pipes in the walls from that old dusty machine, and sometimes I try to find where that water goes. I think it goes out beyond the house, into the grassy field in front of the swing set. When I lay on the grass, sometimes, if I listen very closely and everything else is quiet, I swear I can hear noises coming from far below the ground. They sound like some kind of clockwork mechanism, its gears quietly humming. I don't know what it means, and I don't think I ever will. Undoubtedly, the most puzzling thing about this place is really quite a small feature. There's a computer terminal in the study, and it looks like it's one of the oldest things in the house. It's clearly Foundation, but it's… Unsettling, to say the least. We would have known about this if the Foundation knew, I'm sure. But if that's truly the case, then it still doesn't explain how the anomaly got its number designation. Is it arbitrary, or is it actually cataloged in the outside world? I don't think it's possible to know from here. Sometimes I feel like I'm waiting for something, or for someone. It's not for someone to save me, but it's as if I'm waiting to meet someone here. I dream of what that meeting might be, or why it might be in the first place. But somewhere deep down I know that I will almost certainly die here, and this long wait will be passed down to another, to continue waiting with bated breath for something, though what exactly that something is we can't be sure of. Maybe someday I'll learn how the food gets restocked." -Written by O5-7 Footnotes 1. Cleaning supplies are in the upstairs bathroom. 2. The previous editor, Dr. Orion, failed to provide an explanation for how this is fatal. I have left it here regardless as it is important information -Dr. Oswald 3. Exact date unknown.

SCP-1478 is a group of fifty-four (54) saguaro cacti (Carnegiea gigantea) located in the Sonoran Desert.

*** Item #: SCP-1478 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: The colony of SCP-1478 is to remain where it was found in the Sonoran Desert. Sub-Site 34 has been constructed at the location for the purpose of monitoring the anomaly. Prior to conversation attempts with SCP-1478, personnel are to be equipped with proper desert safety clothing as defined by SCP-1478 specimens. This typically involves wearing a wide-brim hat and a thin or no top. Additionally, personnel are to comply with SCP-1478's demands within reason before talking to them in order to ensure the objects' compliance. Description: SCP-1478 is a group of fifty-four (54) saguaro cacti (Carnegiea gigantea) located in the Sonoran Desert. All specimens of SCP-1478 are visually indistinguishable from non-anomalous cacti of the same species. Objects exhibit full sentience and sapience and often vocalize without apparent means to do so. Groups of these cacti will often converse with each other about topics primarily focused on their immediate area or neighbors. If allowed to converse with subjects outside of their species, SCP-1478 will consistently advise the subjects in desert or American southwestern topics, usually while presenting erroneous information. No instance of SCP-1478 has exhibited hostile behavior; however, the objects will often refuse to participate in conversation for a number of arbitrary reasons. Personnel are to comply to these demands if they are within reason in order to gain information from SCP-1478. When a person conversing with these objects fails to meet its requirements, that person will be transfigured into an instance of SCP-1478. This process has been reported to be painful, but instantaneous. Additionally, persons who have been transformed into an instance of SCP-1478 are able to perceive their prior places of occupation through unknown means. The significance and vector for this trait are currently unknown. Interview Log-1478-Tau: Interviewed: SCP-1478-01 Interviewer: Agent Jason Myers Foreword: The following log was taken during primary discovery of SCP-1478. Agents arriving from Site 23 were attired in the standard black suits. <Begin Log> Myers: Hello. SCP-1478-01: Hey! Say, ain't you hot in that suit? Yer likely to overheat if yer not careful. Myers: Please, don’t worry about me. It’s really not important, I’ll be gone in a minute. Now, if you would, please tell me about this colony. SCP-1478-01: Not important? Sir, I must protest. The desert is mighty dangerous. Y'all goin' to have to change before I start talkin'. [Futher attempts at questioning the subject at this point yield no results other than requests that Myers dress in a manner that would be appropriate for the environment. Agent Myers leaves the scene to a retrieve a hat from the nearest city. Myers returns wearing a fedora, and once again attempts to converse with SCP-1478-01.] SCP-1478-01: You pulling my leg? That ain't enough to shade ya! Yer gonna need something with a wide brim. And what'd I say about them suits? All y'all, git fitted proper. Myers: [sighs heavily] Please, just answer our questions. I don’t think changing for a two minute long interview is really worth going all the way— SCP-1478-01: Not worth it? Not worth it?! Boy, do you know what happens when folks don’t bother preparin’ themselves fer the desert? <End Log> Closing Statement: At the cessation of this interview, Agent Myers was transfigured into an instance of SCP-1478. All personnel from now on are to be dressed in appropriate clothing for the desert as determined by SCP-1478 while interviewing the objects. Interview Log-1478-Chi: Interviewed: SCP-1478-16 Interviewer: Agent Alexander Fredricks Foreword: For the purpose of this interview, Agent Fredricks has been adorned in a sombrero and a poncho. <Begin Log> Fredricks: Hello. SCP-1478-16: Howdy, pardner. Fredricks: Could you please tell me abo— SCP-1478-16: Whoa there, slick. I can’t understand you a spit with yer thick accent. Yer gonna hafter talk in a way I can hear ya. Fredricks: Um… right. Well, perdner, I was wonderin’ if, er, you could inform me aboot this here colony. I reckon. SCP-1478-16: Oh shucks, yer wantin’ to know about us? Well, we’re just some humble folks out here in th’ Sonoran, makin’ our livin’, you know. Shoot, I never introduced myself, did I? Th’ name’s Braxton. Arnold Braxton. Fredricks: Arnold Braxton? The ex—I mean, uh, you the feller that disappeared from Reno ten years ago? [Fredricks attempts to spit on the ground.] SCP-1478-16: ‘sho ‘nuff. I used t’ work fer dem casiners, but I ended up here one day and thought, “Aw heck, I don’t need no stinkin’ city slicker tellin’ me what t’ do! I got e’erythin’ I need right here.” So I stayed. I keep one eye on them, though, just in case they try ‘n’ do somethin’ funny. Fredricks: How do you reckon that you managed to do that? SCP-1478-16: You got broken eyes ‘r somethin’? They’re e’erywhere! Y’ can’t take two steps without bumpin' into a goddamn slot machine. Fredricks: And what are they up to? SCP-1478-16: Swindlin' people. Ol' Roberson finally got fired from there. Good riddance, he probably was dementia'd or somet'in' th' whole time he worked there. An' somethin' about a robbery.1 Fredricks: Shucks, thanks. I think that’ll be it for now. SCP-1478-16: Y’all take care now, y’hear? <End Log> Interview Log-1478-Psi: Interviewed: SCP-1478-054 Interviewer: Agent Fredricks Foreword: SCP-1478-054 has been positively identified as possessing the mind of Agent Myers. <Begin Log> Fredricks: Hey Jason. SCP-1478-54: [sighs] Hey Alex. Fredricks: How are you holding up? SCP-1478-54: Terribly. All these stupid cacti keep speaking in awful fake accents and it’s driving me up the wall. It’s so obvious that none of them have ever actually grown up with these. If I had movable arms and a head, I would have torn out my eardrums by now. Fredricks: That bad, huh? SCP-1478-54: You don’t even know. Hey… I know you’re not here just to chat; that’s not how we work. Let’s just get to it, please. Fredricks: Right. I’m sorry, Jason. Now, have you noticed any changes since the transfiguration? SCP-1478-54: Well, for starters, I feel mentally connected with all these other cacti. Like, I feel their minds, and it’s… I don’t know, I just feel it. I can tell who these people used to be but just aren't anymore. Well, except for one of them. That one, it doesn't seem like it used to be human, and I can hear a very, very loud voice coming from it. It just… wants us to be Southern. I don't understand why, and it just… I don't get it. Fredricks: I see. Where is this one located? SCP-1478-54: About ten meters to your left. Don't get too close to it, I think that it's testy. It'd probably make you into a cactus, too. Fredricks: I see. Anything else? SCP-1478-54: I somehow know what’s going on over at Site 23. I don’t see it, I don’t hear anything, I just kinda know. Like, some idiot broke the vending machine yesterday, right? The new Jackson kid. I know it’s true. Fredricks: Okay, got it. Final remarks? SCP-1478-54: This is probably a side effect of the connection thing, but I feel like the other cacti are, I don’t know… infecting me? I feel like I’m slowly becoming more and more like them. I said “ain’t” yesterday, Al. I never fucking say “ain’t,” it’s the worst word in the history of language, but I fucking said “ain’t” and, well, look at it. It’s happening. Fredricks: Understood. Thank you. <End Log> Footnotes 1. Foundation personnel have verified that all these claims were accurate.

SCP-4422 is a machine in the basement level of Site-4422, formerly the Lomberg Power Station in Ohio, USA.

*** Item #: SCP-4422 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-4422 is contained at its place of discovery, now designated Site-4422. As Site-4422 is able to function as an ordinary power generation facility, its continued operation serves the dual purpose of providing cover for Foundation activity at the Site and supplying power to SCP-4422 and Foundation facilities in the region. 25 auxiliary staff have been assigned to routine operation of the facility, under the guise of local energy authority employees. The lower basement level of Site-4422 housing SCP-4422 itself is restricted to the immediate research team and security personnel. Staff in this area require training in basic chemical and hazardous gas safety protocols and emergency procedures.1 Entry into the main SCP-4422 chamber requires the use of Level A hazmat gear. SCP-4422 is to be monitored at all times, with both automated and manual systems in place for the safe venting of hazardous gases. Use of SCP-4422 requires a formal proposal signed by two senior members of the research team and Level 4 staff approval. No items or persons with causality or temporality-affecting properties are to be brought into the vicinity under any circumstances. UPDATE: As a result of Incident 4422-1, safety standards for the Site-4422 basement level and SCP-4422 have been significantly revised. The maintenance airlock system has been redesigned to incorporate a shielded access airlock with 5-ton blast doors and the main tank walls reinforced. In addition, the basement ventilation system now incorporates emergency sealants capable of isolating the level from the remainder of the facility. Chemical and hazardous gas emergency procedures and rapid access to breathing apparatus are now required for all levels of Site-4422. Description: SCP-4422 is a machine in the basement level of Site-4422, formerly the Lomberg Power Station in Ohio, USA. It fills the majority of the underground space and consists of the following key components: Outer view of SCP-4422 towards access airlock, with under-maintenance solenoid in foreground. a central gas storage tank with capacity of approximately 500,000 L, accessible by a maintenance airlock system piping to the above-ground exhaust chimneys of Site-4422, feeding exhaust gases into the tank a controlled venting system leading to a secondary above-ground exhaust system secondary internal gas injection systems for the purposes of testing and experimentation 50 linear particle accelerators of 40 m length each, arranged in circular formation around the tank walls switchable cold-cathode and ECR ion source particle emitters, designed to allow for the uniform bombardment of the tank contents with either electrons or protons 50 tachyon field emitters similar to those found in SCP-3091, alternating with the particle accelerators a 10,000 ton solenoid magnet encircling the tank, with field strength of up to 3 teslas associated control, power and thermoregulation systems SCP-4422 particle accelerator, #14. Sustained particle bombardment of substances within the tank while the tachyon fields are active temporally displaces substances within the tank into the past or future. Use of electrons in the linear accelerators causes past displacement, while use of protons causes future displacement. The solenoid field strength determines the magnitude of the displacement; at maximum power, the tank contents are displaced approximately 800 years into the past or future. SCP-4422 only affects substances in a gaseous state. The mechanism behind this is poorly understood, but is hypothesised to be due to the stability and stronger intermolecular forces of liquids and solids temporally 'anchoring' substances. Experimentation and modelling suggests displacement of liquids and solids is theoretically possible using SCP-4422 or a similar device, but would require over 100,000 times its current power consumption, and the apparatus used in SCP-4422 is not rated to withstand the excess heat that would be generated during this process. While SCP-4422 was primarily a proof-of-concept, it is effective in its intended function as a means of carbon emission disposal for the power station. Carbon dioxide scrubbers (modified, but consistent with non-anomalous technology available in the 1990s) have been installed in the exhaust chimneys of Site-4422, and carbon dioxide is piped directly from the chimneys into the central tank. Gases are theoretically vented through the secondary exhaust system. This is rarely observed directly given the properties of SCP-4422, but elevated local carbon dioxide concentrations in the vicinity of the secondary exhausts are likely a result of past SCP-4422 use. Past-direction displacement of SCP-4422's contents results in their reappearance in the main tank at a past date until the venting system is engaged. Given the potential for accidents as a result of unforeseen gases materialising in the tank, past-direction displacement of industrial quantities of gases was halted in 1999. SCP-4422 exhaust systems in operation. SCP-4422 was developed by Prometheus Labs, in the course of their activities relating to SCP-2308, and was considered one of their most promising temporal projects. Although it was initially conceived as a general-purpose temporal displacement device, Prometheus were unable to overcome the limitations in displacement of solids and were forced to consider more restricted applications. They purchased the Lomberg plant from American Electric Power in 1985 and continued development on SCP-4422 from that time until 1991. SCP-4422 meets net zero emissions standards (albeit in the present day only) for the plant at competitive running costs; SCP-4422's energy requirements of 150 to 300 MW are covered by the power plant's capacity of 1200 MW and its operational costs are outweighed by eliminating requirements for carbon transport and storage. However, the significant capital investment and improvements in non-anomalous carbon capture and storage technology made SCP-4422 impractical for widespread commercial use, and further development was paused. Reinvestment in the SCP-4422 project recommenced in 1996, as a joint initiative between Prometheus and the ECSI2, but was abruptly halted by the collapse of the Prometheus conglomerate in 1998, after which SCP-4422 came under Foundation control. Addendum 4422-1: Additional uses proposed for SCP-4422 are outlined in the below table. Proposal Notes Status General-purpose temporal displacement SCP-4422 can be used to transport simple materials through boiling or sublimation, with the substances returning to their original state at the destination time point depending on internal tank temperature. The additional power requirements and limits to proofing the internal SCP-4422 mechanisms against a wide range of temperatures are the obstacles to progress in this area. The cost-benefit ratio for previous matter transport proposals has been low, but continued submissions by interested researchers are welcome. Active Extraterrestrial terraforming Displacement of terraforming gases such as ammonia and hydrocarbons into the past using a SCP-4422-derived device may accelerate (or instantaneously produce) beneficial atmospheric change of Mars or other extraterrestrial bodies. Extraterrestrial transport of the relevant gases and materials for the construction of a sufficiently powerful device remains a problem, and public exposure from terraforming within the solar system renders the concept impractical at present. A proposal for terraforming an extrasolar planetoid or asteroid to establish a secure Foundation facility has been submitted, with transport using SCP-████. 14 candidates have been identified and O5 approval is pending. Active Retroactive agriculture The use of SCP-4422 for small-scale local climate alteration favourable to agriculture, combined with the introduction of aerosol pesticides to pre-emptively destroy insect populations before crop planting, was briefly explored by Prometheus, but the cost and inflexibility of on-site SCP-4422 construction was prohibitive. Exploration of this line of research has been halted due to the low convergence with Foundation goals. Withdrawn Chemical warfare Retroactive use of chemical weapons or military atmospheric engineering is possible, but as with other uses, the need for an SCP-4422 device to be constructed in the target location is prohibitive. Development of a miniaturised version of SCP-4422 for various purposes is in progress; testing approval for retroactive targeted assassinations is on hold until the causality hazards associated with targeting sapient individuals can be resolved.3 Active Communication A method for bi-directional temporal communication using SCP-4422 was developed by the Foundation in 2005, involving a letter and phrase coding system based on helium, neon and argon concentration ratios. This was designated Protocol 4422-Sigma and its efficacy validated by the Novikov-Scranton process.4 Guidelines have been provided to key personnel regarding the use of Protocol 4422-Sigma for pre-emptive measures against K-class scenarios and other catastrophic events. However, no future-to-present communications have been received at this time. It is unclear whether this is a result of a lack of relevant messages, future protocol alterations, future disabling of SCP-4422 or an unidentified property of SCP-4422 or temporal anomalies in general. Staff assigned to SCP-4422 should continue monitoring of potential 4422-Sigma-encoded communications. Completed Addendum 4422-2: On 04/11/2016, SCP-4422 was severely damaged by an explosion, later determined to be the result of the sudden introduction of an unidentified flammable gas into the main tank. This resulted in the partial collapse of the basement level and 3 personnel casualties. While firefighting and rescue operations were in progress, a large quantity of VX nerve gas materialised in the damaged tank, which spread through the rest of the Site and caused an additional 33 personnel casualties and 4 civilian casualties in the surrounding area. No recent activity of SCP-4422 or within Site-4422 was linked to this event. However, a joint Foundation-ECSI working group had recently completed a feasibility study on using an upscaled SCP-4422 as a last-resort measure of keeping global temperatures below [REDACTED] degrees of warming, as the ECSI had expressed interest in resuming research on SCP-4422 in partnership with the Foundation following the signing of the Paris Agreement in April 2016. This would have involved production of an initial 12 additional SCP-4422-derived devices with components derived from commercially available and GOC technology. It was estimated that a modernised variant of SCP-4422 would be able to process 1 Mt of carbon dioxide per annum, but with an effectively unlimited storage capacity, and the power for temporal displacement up to 4,000 years in the past or future. No further action on the proposal has been taken at present. Review of monitoring systems following the incident found an 4422-Sigma-encoded message sent 6 minutes prior, translated to the following text: YOU KNOW WHAT YOU WILL DO. SCP-4422 was repaired and containment procedures updated accordingly. Footnotes 1. See Foundation Safety Manual, Vol. 4/Non-Anomalous Procedures, 2014 edition. 2. Esoteric Climate Stability Initiative, a UN-GOC division for paraclimatology policy. 3. See Xyank and Weizmann. (1993) The grandfather trap: quantifying the reality destabilization of temporal paradoxes through Hume levels. Journal of Applied Temporal Mechanics. 20(3-4), 20-25. 4. A Foundation-developed method for determining the presence of temporal anomalies, involving the transmission of an instruction to a future time and sealing the instruction in a time capsule, to be opened after the completion of the instruction and validated by the future receiver.

SCP-5842 is a standard North American stop sign.

*** Item #: SCP-5842 Object Class: Keter Special Containment Procedures: SCP-5842 is currently uncontained. Previous sightings of SCP-5842 are currently being passed off as gags. Wellington is to be monitored in the case that SCP-5842 becomes active again. Description: SCP-5842 is a standard North American stop sign. SCP-5842's primary anomalous property is appearing in a location via unknown means1. Initially, it was believed that SCP-5842 appeared at random, however, further research has discerned a pattern in its appearances. See addenda below. Addendum-5842: Added below is a list of the most noteworthy sightings and encounters with SCP-5842. The first is a series of text message exchanges between Wilma Greggs and her employer. First Encounter: Lisa: Hey, Wilma. I know about everything that's been going on as of late, but you can't just leave work like that. Talk to me. Wilma: oh yea srry i completely forgot to call u. i passed right out when i got home! Lisa: Wait, you managed to get home? But your car is still here! Wilma: i walked home. Lisa: From the office?! Wilma: yea. y is that so weird? Lisa: All 12 miles?! Wilma: yea. Lisa: Jesus, Wilma, how long did that take?! Wilma: 5 hours. Lisa: You left your car at work and walked for 5 hours until you got home?! Wilma: yea. i couldnt drive my car. Lisa: Well, if your car wasn't working, you could have just asked one of us to drive you! Wilma: its not that it wasnt working. there was a stop sign in my car, so i did what it told me and i stopped using that car. Lisa: Excuse me? Wilma: there was a stop sign in my car. ur supposed to stop at a stop sign, right? Lisa: …Wilma. I get off in an hour. Come out of the house. I'll take you somewhere. Come on. My treat. Wilma: sorry. cant. Lisa: Don't worry about the price. I'll take you somewhere, anywhere. It can be a big fancy restaurant, you know? Or a walk in the park. I just want to be there for you, you know? Wilma: i cant leave the house. Lisa: Why not?? Wilma: theres a stop sign outside my window. so i cant go outside. Lisa: …Wilma, I'm gonna call you. <Lisa tries to call Wilma. It gets rejected.> Wilma: stop i cant make phone calls either. Lisa: Come on, dear, just talk to me. You've been working yourself to death. Why can't you answer the phone anyways? Wilma: i cant answer the phone because the stop sign told me not to. Lisa: ??? Wilma: i went for a cup of coffee at the office and then i heard the customer phone ring. when i went there to answer it, there was a stop sign in my cubicle. Lisa: IN your cubicle? Wait, is that why you left work?? Wilma: yea. tbh i think its haunting me. Lisa: Haunting?? But that junk's not even real! Wilma: well thats what i thought too until it started following me. oh well. Lisa: Wilma. I'm signing this 30 day off slip. I'll need your signature, okay? Wilma: only if u come here. Lisa: That's fine. Wilma: actually nvm dont come here. Lisa: Why? Wilma: its at my front door now. no visitors. Lisa: Wilma! Wilma: have to obey traffic laws. thomas would agree with me :) Lisa: Thomas? Wilma, does William know yet? Wilma: no. i'll tell him after his birthday. Lisa: Okay. Well. I'm still coming, okay? Wilma: eh. Second Encounter: SCP-5842 made an appearance in the morgue of Tillman Funeral Home and Crematory. The following is a letter of resignation by Craig Dillard, an employee of Tillman Funeral Home. Dear Johnny Truman. This is my official letter of resignation. As you know, I am a very devout and pious follower of the Christian faith. For the longest time, I thought I was doing a good job, handling the bodies of the deceased and preparing them for burials. I had always believed that taking on a job such as this was good for my soul. I thought that if I helped my fellow men and women see off their loved ones as they departed to the gilded gates of our glorious God, that I'd be recognized as virtuous. But sadly, that is not the case. I have received a sign from our Lord and Heavenly Father that I must stop what I have dedicated my career to. I was working on the body of an emissary of traffic when I turned around and saw the sign from God right then and there, peering down upon my work in the midst of me checking on the body's decomposition. In his life, this man directed the automobiles on the road. In death, he—ergo, God—has directed the vehicle of my life choices. I must leave this occupation. If God himself gave me this sign, I must heed it. Thank you for everything, Johnny. I wish you the best, Craig Dillard Third Encounter: SCP-5842 was spotted in Wellington Elementary School. There was a writing assignment that had the students introduce themselves and describe something of interest that they had seen. One of the students described their experience of being followed by SCP-5842, transcribed below. Spelling and grammar errors are preserved from the original document. William Greggs 10/4/2019 Mrs. Pollock cool things i have seen Hi my name is william greggs but my mommy and daddy call me will. my mommy is wilma greggs her name sounds almost the same right? daddys the only one with a different name and its thomas greggs! Cool! im 6 years old and i love my mommy and daddy. i saw a cool thing in the bathroom weerd thing. i saw a cool red stop sign and my favorite color is red and it was in there it was looking at me when I went in. someone doesnt want me to use the bathroom, so i didnt. held it in all day and im proud of myself and i think mommy and daddy would be proud too. everytime i use the bathroom there is a stop sign in there looking at me and it turn around when im not looking. maybe its my gardeen stop sign. like an angel but it makes me stop doing daynjers things and not make bad guys stop being bad. i wish the stop sign had wings that made cars stop. daddy is a crossing guard and he would always hold a little stop sign that has no wings and tell people when to go or when to stop. i dont get it but he looks cool when he does it he blows a whistle, really hard and it gets so loud. mommy drove me over to see him and he waved at us. I love daddy. I havent seen daddy in a while I wonder where he is? Today is my birthday maybe hes playing hide and seek with me and hes putting stop signs in the school bathroom as a joke. Sometimes I find the stop sign in my own room daddy is so funny. I will give him a big hug when I see him again!!! Fourth Encounter: SCP-5842 was found placed at an intersection that forced a male civilian to stop in front of an oncoming vehicle. The following collision led to SCP-5842 being severely dented and damaged and subsequently caused the death of a male civilian. Incident reports leading up to that event have been added below. Incident Date: 9/30/2019 Summary: SCP-5842 was seen in the driveway of a civilian identified as Frank Smith. As Frank Smith was pulling out of his driveway, SCP-5842 appeared behind his car and dented his rear bumper. SCP-5842 vanished immediately afterwards. Incident Date: 9/30/2019 Summary: Frank Smith awakened in the middle of the night to SCP-5842 standing over him while he was asleep in bed. Neighbors reported seeing him run out of his home and screaming, "leave me alone! Please! I didn't mean to!" Incident Date: 10/2/2019 Summary: Frank Smith arrived at his job at South Palm Beach County Courthouse and went to use the restroom. Moments later, he ran out of there with his work pants at his ankles. He ran down a hallway while hysterically screaming, "he won't even let me shit in peace!" Incident Date: 10/4/2019 Summary: Frank Smith witnessed SCP-5842 sitting in the judge's seat in a court room half an hour before a court case he was overseeing. He prostrated and begged it for forgiveness before he vacated the premises and was not seen until his collision. Addendum-5842-2: SCP-5842's last reported sighting was South Florida National Cemetery. It was found leaning over a tombstone before it disappeared again. There have been no reported sightings since. Inscription on tombstone: Thomas Greggs 10/4/1990 - 9/27/2019 Footnotes 1. Due to the similarities between SCP-5842 and SCP-1047, an investigation is underway to find a connection between them.

SCP-3037 is a miniature model of the walled city of Dubrovnik, Croatia.

*** Item #: SCP-3037 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-3037 is to be kept in a standard Safe class storage locker at Site-19. When it is being transported, personnel are not to hold it in their hands; rather, it may be slid onto a wheeled cart and pushed to its destination. SCP-3037-A instances created for testing are to be terminated at the conclusion of each test. Additionally, no more than one instance of SCP-3037-A is to exist at any given time. In the event that multiple instances are created, all of them are to be terminated. Description: SCP-3037 is a miniature model of the walled city of Dubrovnik, Croatia. Its base is an irregular octagon that resembles a square measuring 9 centimeters on each edge, and it is composed of plaster and painted with acrylic. Persons who hold SCP-30371 are designated instances of SCP-3037-A. Instances of SCP-3037-A believe themselves to actually be the city of Dubrovnik, and speak exclusively in Serbo-Croatian. Amnestic treatment has thus far proven ineffective in reversing these effects. SCP-3037-A instances have also exhibited anomalous physical changes corresponding to current events in the city of Dubrovnik. Any damage sustained by the city causes corresponding bodily harm to instances of SCP-3037-A, which cannot heal unless the city of Dubrovnik is also repaired. A notable example of this was observed in December of 19912 (see Incident Log 3037-Alpha). Testing has shown that this relationship is not reciprocal. Instances of SCP-3037-A may be harmed without causing corresponding damage to the real city of Dubrovnik. Instances of SCP-3037-A believe themselves to be parents of SCP-3037 itself. As such, they are reluctant to put it down or expose it to harm; if they are forced to give up SCP-3037 or it appears to be damaged, they show reactions consistent with those of parents whose children have been harmed. Multiple concurrent instances of SCP-3037-A may exist at any given time, and appear willing to put down SCP-3037 only if they are handing it over to another instance. Even when these instances are aware of each other's existence, they do not show signs of distress. If, for example, there are ten SCP-3037-A instances in existence, they claim that there exist eleven copies3 of the city of Dubrovnik, all of which are parents of SCP-3037. + Recovery Log - Recovery Log In the summer of 1988, Dr. V████████, a researcher at Site-19, began exhibiting a streak of absenteeism. Investigation of his home by Foundation agents found that he had been at home the entire time, and had been affected by the object that was later designated SCP-3037. Further investigation found that Dr. V████████ had never been to Dubrovnik, and had bought SCP-3037 at a local art exhibition. The object was originally wrapped and boxed, and he did not directly hold it until removing it from the box in his home. The company organizing the art exhibition had no records of a vendor selling art inspired by Yugoslavia or the Dalmatian Coast region. Because payment for the object was made in cash, the identity of the artist is unknown. The exact nature of SCP-3037's anomalous properties was determined during recovery, as a Foundation agent handled the object after bringing the first SCP-3037-A instance (formerly Dr. V████████) into containment. This agent, in turn, became an SCP-3037-A instance. Containment was established when both SCP-3037-A instances were tranquilized and the object was handled with tongs to be placed into its current Safe class storage locker. + Interview Log 3037-Aleph - Interview Log 3037-Aleph Interviewer: Dr. C█████, a researcher at Site-19 Subject: An instance of SCP-3037-A, formerly Dr. V████████. At the time of the interview, there were six instances of SCP-3037-A. The contents of this log have been translated into English from Serbo-Croatian. Extraneous data have been redacted. [BEGIN LOG 14/07/1988 11:15:07] Dr. C█████: How are you feeling today? SCP-3037-A: The same as usual. Rocky, ancient, humid, warm today. Dr. C█████: And SCP-3037? SCP-3037-A: My daughter? She is doing well, but please be quiet, she is sleeping. Dr. C█████: Of course. I would like to confirm some of your previous statements. You are the ancient walled city of Dubrovnik, correct? SCP-3037-A: Correct. One of seven Dubrovniks. Dr. C█████: Can you tell me how an entire city has arms and legs, or fits inside this one room? SCP-3037-A: That is simply what cities do. Cities have arms and legs, a whole body. And they fit inside rooms. I am not sure what it is you are asking. Dr. C█████: Could you please define "city" for me? SCP-3037-A: A place where many people live, made of buildings, stone, maybe wood. It has a body that can fit inside a room, and it is composed of several neighborhoods. There are seven of the city of Dubrovnik. Dr. C█████: And how does an entire city have a daughter? SCP-3037-A: Doctor, I hope you will excuse my modesty. I do not want to answer that question. Dr. C█████: I am a scientist, you will not disgust me. SCP-3037-A: Fine. A city… is made of marble, is it not? Dr. C█████: Some cities are. SCP-3037-A: My daughter was, well, carved from my marble. It is quite simple, really. She will make an excellent city herself one day. Dr. C█████: Thank you, I have no more questions for today. [END LOG 14/07/1988 11:18:14] Note: Chemical analysis of SCP-3037 consistently indicates that it is not made of marble. + Incident Log 3037-Alpha: Siege of Dubrovnik - Incident Log 3037-Alpha: Siege of Dubrovnik Beginning in October of 1991, the Yugoslav People's Army besieged the real city of Dubrovnik. At the time, the Foundation had fifteen instances of SCP-3037-A in custody. During the siege, each of these instances reported some difficulty in eating, and minor lacerations manifested at times corresponding to actual attacks on the city of Dubrovnik. The bombardment of the Old Town of Dubrovnik reached its peak on 06/12/1991. At almost exactly 06:00:00 Central European Time, during this bombardment, all fifteen instances of SCP-3037-A exploded in succession, roughly one second apart. The order in which they exploded was observed to correspond to the order in which they were created. The first instance of SCP-3037-A exploded with relatively little force, but each successive explosion was increasingly powerful. The last instance exploded with force equivalent to roughly one ton of TNT, breaching several containment chambers at Site-19 and resulting in the loss of █ personnel. It is hypothesized that instances of SCP-3037-A have an anomalous connection not only with the real city of Dubrovnik, but also with each other. Therefore, the second instance of SCP-3037-A was not only damaged by the shelling of Dubrovnik, but also by the explosion of the first instance, and so on. In this way, the explosive force of the first instance of SCP-3037-A was multiplied by 214 by the time the fifteenth instance exploded. Due to this incident, it is now prohibited for more than one instance of SCP-3037-A to exist at any given time. Footnotes 1. "Holding" is here defined as supporting the entire weight of the object with one's hands for at least one whole second, making physical contact with the object 2. During the Siege of Dubrovnik by the Yugoslav People's Army 3. Including the actual city

SCP-5856 is a sociokinetic and tele-empathic humanoid entity, kept in a state of permanent disorientation within the boardroom.

*** Item №: SCP-5856 Anomaly Class: Robertson-Jackal Threat Level: Saddlebrown ● Special Containment Procedures: SCP-5856 is currently contained by the combined efforts of Containment Team CT-5856 ("Unfettered Mares"), of which you are the newest member. You find this normal. It is contained within Containment Complex 5856, which consists of the following main components: R5856/1: The boardroom. This is the room within which SCP-5856 is contained. It is outfitted with decor and furniture in a style which is considered by some to be socially normal. You find the style to be a tad gaudy. For religious reasons, it is located at the centre of the complex, with barred windows to all other rooms and a balcony overlooking washroom #4. R5856/2: The scullery. The purpose of this room is known to every person except yourself. R5856/3: Desmond's bedroom. This is the room within which Desmond sleeps. You must never enter this room unless Desmond contacts you via telegram. The room houses a variety of Oriental mannequins and scented candles. The former of these is considered normal to you. You have never witnessed the latter before, and find the concept scary and bewildering. The possession of one or more of the latter objects is punishable by death in your homeland. You will never meet the occupant of this room, as they are currently on an expedition to Peru — an event to which you were initially invited, but rejected from at the last moment. R5856/4: Bulwark Street Station. This is a shared common area, where you may mingle with the other members of CT-5856. It is outfitted with a coal scuttle and tanning salon. There are complimentary supplies of powdered milk, your favourite food. You dislike others eating your favourite food, and often make this known. R5856/5: The parlour. This is your private residence, and decorated in a way you find entirely normal and appealing. One of the other members of CT-5856 find(s) your decor to be in poor taste, while two others feel it is mildly blasphemous. You care about the opinions of at least two of these people. R5856/6 through 12 are the private residences of the other members of CT-5856, whom you are eager to meet. There are also numerous supplementary rooms and installations throughout the complex, the functions of which will likely become clear. The exception to this is the menagerie, which has been locked. You wish very much to gain entry, and know that another member of the containment team has the key. At the end of your week-long stay in the parlour, you will be amnesticised. This is morally and ethically acceptable to you. You may then be administered another course of hypnotic suggestives, re-educated regarding social norms, and reintroduced to an altered version of the complex, alongside multiple people who you may or may not have met before. This is also morally and ethically acceptable to you. Currently, the only members of CT-5856 who you have pre-formed opinions of are: Langley deBaucher, whom you despise due to your differences in opinion regarding dogs. Viscount Charles, whom you regard ambivalently due to unspoken sexual tension. Zachary F. Callahan, whom you wish to marry due to her fabulous antique eggs. Of those you haven't yet formed opinions of, exactly three have already formed opinions of you. In order to contain SCP-5856, you must attempt to befriend Dr. Leopold Franc-Polio and set Langley deBaucher up with a romantic partner. Do not let Li Richter reveal that you are secretly racist. Avoid all contact with the complex's several-hundred gargoyles and deduce the blood type of every person more popular than yourself. Description: SCP-5856 is a sociokinetic and tele-empathic humanoid entity, kept in a state of permanent disorientation within the boardroom. It is capable of manipulating any and all coherent social bonds with entities who know of its existence in any form, which renders it incredibly dangerous and nigh-uncontainable in normal situations. In casual conversation, SCP-5856 may be referred to by you as the secret George. You find this normal. It will remain a non-threat so long as the Special Containment Procedures above are upheld. The SCP Foundation thanks you for your part in these procedures. Please now return to your quarters. The remainder of CT-5856 will join you for dinner at 1800 hours. Your ceremonial sceptre and Auckland 2004 Yellow Pages telephone directory will arrive shortly. They are familiar items to you, and your first instinct regarding their use is entirely correct. End of file.

SCP-3531 is a Boeing 737 airliner.

*** Item #: SCP-3531 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-3531 is to be stored in the hangar of Site-38. Tests are to be conducted at the discretion of the Site Director. Description: SCP-3531 is a Boeing 737 airliner. SCP-3531 is unremarkable in both exterior and interior appearance, and is non-anomalous when not in flight. However, photographs, videos, and audio recordings taken within SCP-3531 during flight show various forms of aquatic-based anomalous phenomena, as well as the manifestation of several humanoid figures acting as flight attendants on board. Despite this, passengers remain either ignorant or unwilling to comment on the phenomena, denying all claims and in most cases refusing to believe video evidence. Addendum: Test Log A series of tests were conducted on SCP-3531 shortly after its retrieval. The final of these tests is logged below. VIDEO LOG DATE: September 7th, 2017 NOTE: Multiple D-Class personnel were stationed in SCP-3531. D-1442 was issued a water-proof camera for the purpose of recording this video log. Agent Kulkarni was piloting SCP-3531. <BEGIN LOG> 0:00: D-1442 begins recording, positioned in a window seat on the far left. SCP-3531 has taken off. The intercom starts, playing a message. Hello, everyone, and welcome to your flight with Kingfisher Airlines! I'll be your pilot. Now that we've successfully taken off, make sure to keep your seat belts unbuckled. Make our jobs a little easier, eh? D-1442 promptly unbuckled their seatbelt. 2:23: D-1442 pans to their right. A small wave of water runs through the floor, depositing seaweed throughout the aisle. 3:03: Camera shakes violently. D-1442 mutters, complaining about turbulence. Camera pans quickly to the window. A jumble of wire has caught onto the wings of SCP-3531, extending upwards indefinitely. 9:52: A pair of flight attendants enter view. An attendant offers D-1442 a can of worms, which he accepts. D-1442 begins consumption by placing individual worms in his mouth. 10:03: The flight attendants walk back through the aisle. The seaweed from before has built up, now fully covering the passageway. 12:01: A flight attendant is seen escorting multiple passengers through the cabin. The attendant is draped in wires, with fishing hooks in place of their hands. D-1442 falsely asserts familial relationships with the earlier passenger as the reason. 15:03: The plane begins shaking violently. D-1442 hurriedly turns to the window. Multiple electric eels are present outside the window, weaving in and out of the clouds. Rapidly moving cloud formations expel waves of water and flashes of lightning, causing violent shaking within SCP-3531. D-1442 laughs nervously, joking about a thunderstorm. 15:14: D-1442 finishes the can of worms. 16:01: An eel smashes through the window of SCP-3531, wriggling in D-1442's lap. D-1442 does not seem to notice this. The eel continues wriggling as waves of water crash into SCP-3531, flooding the plane with water. As the water becomes level with the camera, choking noises can be heard along with violent camera shaking as D-1442 attempts to breathe the water. D-1442 does not stop, instead continuing to inhale the water, soon falling unconscious. 16:35: The camera leaves D-1442's grip. The camera drifts upwards, presumably having been let go by D-1442, eventually hitting a passenger's arm and turning around to reveal D-1442's floating body, among several others. The seaweed from before appears to be growing over many of the passengers' bodies. The camera remains buoyant, having hit the ceiling. 17:12: Agent Kulkarni runs into view, seemingly unaffected by the lack of breathable air. He convulses briefly, before collapsing to the ground. Kulkarni rears his head and unhinges his jaw, shooting several large hooks out of his mouth, attached to fishing wire presumably originating from within Kulkarni. The hooks move on their own, impaling all personnel aboard, some hooks impaling multiple passengers. Kulkarni is dragged off-screen, bringing the passengers with him. 18:38: The intercom starts. It is interrupted by brief static. A message plays. Thank you for flying with Kingfisher! <END LOG> Upon landing, SCP-3531 was found to have suffered none of the damage captured on video. Multiple fish of various species were strewn about the seats of SCP-3531. None of the personnel aboard were found within SCP-3531. The camera was recovered in D-1442's seat. Recovery: SCP-3531 was discovered after routine inspection of its black box footage by Mobile Task Force Lambda-4 ("Birdwatchers"). The recording showed the following message played over the intercom, exhibiting its cognitohazardous effect: Okay, I got a little proposal for you. I know Kingfisher only wants the best, so you better believe me when I say I’ve found the best. Down in a certain little universe, in a certain little planet, all over it even, I found these beauties. They’re called humans. You’ll love ‘em. They’ve got these beautiful hands, four fingers - and that’s not even including the opposable thumbs. Strong, dexterous legs, a full meaty torso, trust me. It’s the whole package. Everyone’s gonna want ‘em. Problem areas, you say? Well, they’ve got a substandard moral compass, that’s for sure. But between you ‘n me, I don’t think anyone’ll notice.

SCP-4322 is a radio transceiver, anomalously modified to transmit psionic waves instead of electromagnetic radiation.

*** Item #: SCP-4322 Thaumiel SCP-4322 Special Containment Procedures: SCP-4322 is to remain continuously active, with daily four-hour breaks in transmission. Interviews with affected D-class are to be carried out quarterly to maintain quality of service. Personnel are encouraged to submit media for potential inclusion in broadcasts. Description: SCP-4322 is a radio transceiver, anomalously modified to transmit psionic waves instead of electromagnetic radiation. It receives input via a standard Ψ-5 cable1 and, until its modification by Foundation researchers, generated output using its metal casing as an antenna. The object was recovered from PoI-3984 in Szczecin, Poland, who had previously used the object to provide comfort for his mother. The psychic energy produced by SCP-4322 matches the profile of Type-Δ anomalous radiation, which is characterized by its extremely low interference with matter and high propagation over great distances. As part of Project Somnium, Foundation researchers installed an antenna extension composed of a beryllium-copper-lead alloy. This increased the effective range of SCP-4322 from approximately 4 meters to 2.1 × 107 meters, permitting its signals to be received anywhere on Earth. However, despite its high transmissibility, the signal is weak and difficult to detect: the only known receivers are Class-II psychoreceptors or sentient minds lacking normal sensory input. Due to the psychic nature of the transmission, receiving individuals are capable of complete perception of the broadcast, regardless of prior sensory impairments2 or linguistic fluency. Research is presently underway to include support for tactile, gustatory, and olfactory sensations. Media selected for SCP-4322 should be generally inoffensive and culturally varied. Examples of past transmissions have included: Beethoven's Sixth Symphony in F major Hour-long recording of rain Documentary about the history of calculus Improvised, small-ensemble jazz from SCP-5805 Paintings of wolves hunting My Neighbor Totoro (1988) Tuvan throat singing Pictures of nature taken in New Zealand Dark Was the Night by Blind Willie Johnson Addendum 4322-1: Project Somnium Following the object's initial recovery, it was kept in a Safe-class locker until it was requisitioned to study weak psychosignalling, which was hypothesized to permit field communication where standard radio equipment could not be used. While the project was ultimately abandoned, it was discovered that experimental alloy B-1304 was effective at propagating SCP-4322's waveforms. Senior Researcher Chen proposed Project Somnium, which was denied by O5-13 as an unacceptable risk to normalcy. The Ethics Committee subsequently voted to overturn the decision and approved allocation of resources for the project. Testing of SCP-4322's ability to transmit sound, visuals, and abstract concepts was performed on D-41562 by temporarily disabling their external sensory input.3 Over the course of four months, modifications were made to the object's transmitter to achieve global coverage. A trial run was undertaken for six months to discover any previously unknown side effects. After being deemed safe, O5-4 approved full deployment and reclassified SCP-4322 as Thaumiel. Since its activation, it is estimated that the object has lessened the suffering of over twelve million disembodied brains. Footnotes 1. Coaxial cable designed for the transfer of anomalous memetic information. 2. Such as deafness or blindness. 3. After this individual's body expired, their brain was moved to a standard mind-interface capsule per Foundation interment protocol. More From This Author More From This Author aismallard's Works SCPs SCP-4853 • SCP-4781 • SCP-1294-J • SCP-3597 • SCP-5510 • SCP-4838 • SCP-5446 • SCP-4339 • SCP-5134 • SCP-5900 • SCP-5502 • SCP-5871 • SCP-4447 • SCP-6115 • Tales/GoI Formats The Heart of the Beast • The Pumpkin Mystery • Other aismallard's personnel file •

SCP-3854 is a semi-animate, sapient wooden construct superficially resembling a whale.

*** Item #: SCP-3854 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-3854 is to be kept in a freshwater containment tank in Site-36. SCP-3854 requires no active maintenance, but a wood restoration specialist is to be kept on-site to perform monthly check-ups on the subject. Personnel that interact with SCP-3854 are to be fluent in Hebrew. As per Anomalous Sapient Entity protocol, SCP-3854 is to undergo a weekly psychiatric evaluation. Description: SCP-3854 is a semi-animate, sapient wooden construct superficially resembling a whale. SCP-3854's external dimensions measure 1.1 m x 3.2 m x 1.2 m, while its internal dimensions (designated SCP-3854-A) measure an approximate 500 square meters. SCP-3854 is cognizant, being able to communicate in Biblical Hebrew, Old Aramaic, and High Enochian1. The subject purports to be the aquatic animal that once detained the biblical prophet Jonah, a claim consistent with Assyrian tomes (620-612 BC) from the Horizon Initiative's universal texts. SCP-3854 was recovered washed up on a beach near Tel Aviv, Jerusalem. The phrase "Scrivener Associates" is painted onto the side of SCP-3854 in plain English. SCP-3854-A functions as a self-contained thaumaturge confinement chamber comprised of contiguous layers of Ziziphus spina-christi2. The teeth, fins, vertebrae frame, and eyes of SCP-3854 were manufactured by timber derived from a ~2620-year-old ziziphus tree located on the outskirts of Jerusalem. SCP-3854-A-1 is the gastrointestinal domicile that composes the main space of SCP-3854-A, accessible from SCP-3854's mouth. Its construction matches that of modern, Western European synagogues, with the following deviations: An abundance of Persian rugs. Walls made of ziziphus bark. Whalebone archways in the place of doors. A ceiling made entirely of whale blubber. Two portholes corresponding to SCP-3854's eyes, which emit sunlight regardless of time of day. A theater stage in the place of an altar. Several Eye of Providence images trained on said theater stage A series of clay tablets detailing several morality plays (see addenda) SCP-3854-A-2 is a postchamber accessible from a doorway at the back of SCP-3854-A-1's theater stage. The room's construction is notably more organic than SCP-3854-A-1, with the walls and ceiling being formed of human epithelial tissue. The floor is made of petrified wood, with select, illuminated spots engraved with Biblical scenes of destruction. The only source of light in SCP-3854-A-2 is SCP-3854-B. SCP-3854-B is the collective designation for 40 enlarged uteri on the far wall of SCP-3854-A-2. The SCP-3854-B are semi-transparent, and backlit by an orange light of indeterminate source. Each instance, except SCP-3854-B-36, contains an apparent3 human zygote. SCP-3854-B-36 is empty, with a visible tear indicating violent struggle from its former contents. Addendum: The following is a translated4 excerpt of stone tablets found within SCP-3854-A-1. The tablets were primarily written in High Enochian, with portions, such as Jonah's lines, written in Proto-Sinaitic5. Further transcripts can be found in Appendix-3854. 3854 Translated Script 3854 Translated Script pg-I Mercy! Takes Time to Digest Three days and three nights. by M. S. Distributed by Jim Henson. Copyright © 7777777, by M. S. Cast of Characters STAGHORN-WINGS: The CAPTAIN on the ship bound towards Tarshish. LANCED-MOUTHS: SAILORS #1, #2, and #3 on the ship bound towards Tarshish. CEASELESS-MOUTHS: The SUN that burnt Nineveh, the EAST WIND that burnt JONAH's skin and the VOICE OF THE LORD that so loved His people. GRANT-ME-WINGS-OH-LORD-GOD: The KIKAYON plant. UNANTHROMORPHIC-WHEEL-WITH-EYES: ORGY PARTICIPANTS #1, #2, and #3. JONAH: Future mouthpiece of the Lord's divine predilections. MAY-THE-EARTH-TREMBLE-AT-THE-LORDS-MIGHT: Tree #1. FIRE-AND-BRIMSTONE-ARE-DIVINE-INSTRUMENTS: Tree #2. pg-II ACT I Scene 1: Prophet Pariah SETTING: Cobwebs conquer every corner of the room. Candlelight blows out too soon and JONAH must settle with an uneasy rest on the matted floor. He has just fled the only home he has ever known. Meanwhile, atop the deck, a storm occurs. Roaring waves bombard the ship. Scared, some SAILORS begin throwing cargo off board while others pray to their heretical Gods. The CAPTAIN hammers JONAH's door. Characters: CAPTAIN, SAILORs, The VOICE OF THE LORD, and JONAH. CAPTAIN: How can you sleep? Get up! Get up! JONAH: Huh, what? CAPTAIN: You can sleep later if there is one. Have you not heard the thunderstorms in the sky? JONAH: Yes, I have heard of the thunderstorms in the sky. From you. Just now. CAPTAIN: Dear Abzu, Lord of the primeval seas, save me from this fool. [Cue derelict wood prop falling beside Jonah] CAPTAIN: Close enough, Abzu. Now, hurry Jonah, to the deck. We need more hands to throw out the cargo. [Cue to Jonah feigning tiredness] JONAH: If we're going to die anyway, I'd rather do it from the comfiness of a haystack. Come here haystack, yes, be my companion for tonight. [Cue to Jonah fawning over a vaguely feminine hay pillow. STAGHORN-WINGS pulls Jonah up the stairs and through the doorways.] pg-III CAPTAIN: How goes it? [Cue to LANCED-MOUTHS shoveling cargo off the ship setpiece.] SAILOR #1: Grim, we just shoved off two sacks of gold, three barrels of rum, and five men named Steve6 into the water. The ship won't budge. CAPTAIN: [It yells] Helmsman, how goes it? [LANCED-MOUTHS falls to the ground, crying and pleading, clutching the false idols hanging around its second neck] SAILOR #2: Oh Anu, here my cry! Damnit. Oh Enki, I beseech thee, quell this storm! Damnit. Oh Marduk, please tell me you're not a fluke. [Cue cymbals banging, spotlight flash. LANCED-MOUTHS shrugs two shoulders and throws out its false idols.] SAILOR #2: Oh well. That's all of them, Captain. CAPTAIN: Damned, Jonah, you better have a God for us, lest we confuse you for cargo like we did Steve. [Cue to STAGHORN-WINGS making a threatening gesture. Lightning bolt at the top of the mast deployed. Red streamers pop out of the mast, ropes, and sails.] JONAH: Hey Jehovah, cut that out. No means no, and I'm not returning your calls just so I can take a "paid" vacation to some foreign country called Nineveh with all manner of molestation and sin. They can rot in a valley. VOICE OF THE LORD: Alright, you know what? No more mister nice-and-benevolent. Convert to me, all of you, then throw Jonah into the big fish. [Cue to a big fish parking next to the ship. LANCED-MOUTHS and STAGHORN-WINGS haul Jonah from where he stands and flings him overboard. They begin praying and singing hymns to the Lord] JONAH: I hate you all! [Cue to the clouds, storms, and sea pieces receding, fog machine turned off. A sunshine setpiece overhead.] pg-IV ACT I Scene 2: Nautical Nightmare! SETTING: Pink-red walls pulsate around Jonah as he wakes up. His hand burns from accidentally touching acidic liquids that surround the small amount of land underneath him, made of small kidney stones and hardened barnacle. A bizarre emissary unto the Lord — fluttering countless wings, spinning screaming wheels — levitates above him. Dishes made of whale meat are prepared for him. Characters: The VOICE OF THE LORD and JONAH. JONAH: Ahh, my head. Wait, where am I? What is this place? [Cue to voice emanating out of the emissary] VOICE OF THE LORD: You are inside of a servant of mine. JONAH: Well I'm staying here. I won't go to Nineveh, nothing you can do or say will make me change my mind on the matter. VOICE OF THE LORD: Now Jonah, why do you think it always has to be about sodomites, thieves, and erroneous beliefs. Sometimes, God gets lonely. JONAH: You kept burning all the bushes when I was awake commanding me to go to Nineveh. And when I was asleep, you kept yelling about it from a dream cloud. VOICE OF THE LORD: Look we might've got off on the— Hey wait a minute, I'm the Lord your God, I don't have to take this from you. Do your job or I sink you in whale acid. JONAH: But it's a big fish? VOICE OF THE LORD: That's not how your descendants will remember it if you live that long. JONAH: Alright, alright. O, Lord, slow to anger, fury and all manner of retribution. Your pity hath shaped me, the beast that serves you and humbles me in digestive fluids. Sinners and sodomites shall learn that you forgive iniquity and transgression and sin. I am cured! VOICE OF THE LORD: The Lord, God will by no means absolve the guilty, but by gracious mercy and primordial seas, the Lord shall enter their hearth and wash them clean. You are dismissed, my child. Go to Nineveh unmolested. [The walls scrunch up and a sneeze is heard. Jonah is spat out of a blowhole.] {Continued in Appendix-3854} Addendum: On 12/19/1986, shortly after the initial exploration of SCP-3854-A, SCP-3854 regained consciousness. Lead researcher Chasin subsequently conducted a field interview with SCP-3854: 3854 Interview 3854 Interview Interviewer: Dr. Chasin Interviewee: SCP-3854 Foreword: The subject has a drawn out manner of speaking. Pauses have been edited out of this transcript for legibility purposes. Phrases in italic are translated from Enochian. [SCP-3854 begins stirring, producing unknown vocalizations] [Assistant Researcher James turns on audio recorder he had on hand] Dr. Chasin: -ou can speak? [Whale song, wood creaking] SCP-3854: Yes. [Dr. Chasin turns to Researcher James, ascertains that he is recording, returns to facing SCP-3854] Dr. Chasin: Is there any name you prefer to go by? SCP-3854: None. Dr. Chasin: None? Well, can you tell me who you are? SCP-3854: Flotsam. [Dr. Chasin is taken aback by the Enochian] Dr. Chasin: What, is it that you just said? SCP-3854: Debris. Holy garbage. Dr. Chasin: If you're… garbage, well then you must have been something before you were garbage. [High-pitched hum from SCP-3854] SCP-3854: A tool of the Lord. I was Jonah's fish. [Dr. Chasin struggles to come up with a response] [Researcher James pantomimes Dr. Chasin to discuss SCP-3854-A] Dr. Chasin: Mouth? Mouth! Err, can you tell us about the contents of your… stomach? SCP-3854: Part of the lesson. Dr. Chasin: Lesson? What kind of… lesson? SCP-3854: We all have roles. Jonah had to rehearse for his. My role was to help him rehearse. And to study. And to pray. Dr. Chasin: But what about the cave? SCP-3854: Cave? Dr. Chasin: The cave with the embryos. SCP-3854: Oh. SCP-3854: Those are angels. Dr. Chasin: What? SCP-3854: Angels. Angels carry messages. Symbols are strong messages. Embryos. the unborn of Nineveh. A symbol of innocence that's at stake. Dr. Chasin: Are these angels… also debris? [Low droning sound] SCP-3854: No. Angels are not as disposable as me. Different sense of time. They are where they are meant to be. Waiting for their next duty. Dr. Chasin: Then the womb that was torn open, would that be an escaped angel? Some kind of Christian demon? SCP-3854: No. Don't be absurd. That was Jonah. Dr. Chasin: …You gave birth to Jonah? SCP-3854: I nursed him. I had to do it after he failed all his lessons. The study. The self-reflection. And the sixty-seven shows he put on did not do any good for him. SCP-3854: So I took him into myself. [Dr. Chasin grimaces] Dr. Chasin: Was it painful? SCP-3854: He thrashed. Tried to not get pulled in. But he succumbed to the slumber. The dreams and the visions he saw eventually worked. Dr. Chasin: What did he see? SCP-3854: I don't know. Time was different for him than for me or even the angels. To me. He slept through the third night peacefully. To him. He must have gone through an age in there, tempered. Footnotes 1. Subject displays no additional knowledge of Pseudo-Enochian, Low Enochian, or Middle Enochian. 2. Also known as the "Christ's thorn jujube" or the Lote-tree in regions within the Levant. 3. See Interview Log. 4. See: Bishop, Thomas. “Extraordinary Languages, Mundane Typefaces” Observer: An SCP Foundation Journal (1995): 375 5. Jonah, having lived in approximately the 8th century BC, would have no ability to read Proto-Sinaitic. 6. Transliterated from "[THIS TERMINAL DOES NOT SUPPORT ENOCHIAN TEXT]"

SCP-325 is a small bottle of ██████ brand washing detergent, a product commonly sold in the United Kingdom.

*** Item #: SCP-325 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-325 is to be held in a standard 30 cm x 10 cm x 10 cm steel box. This box should be waterproofed and lined with hydrophobic rubber, and stored away from any washing facilities. If SCP-325 breaches containment, standard Foundation issue NBC protection suits are to be used to spread desiccant on the affected area. All used desiccant should be incinerated according to standard incineration procedure. SCP-325 can be safely stored at any Site, and with any SCP. Any personnel showing a greatly increased adherence to cleaning and hygiene than required are to be detained and given new Foundation issue overalls to be worn for the next 24 hours. After this suspected personnel are to undergo a psychiatric evaluation. Description: SCP-325 is a small bottle of ██████ brand washing detergent, a product commonly sold in the United Kingdom. However, the "█████ █████ █████!" name present on the label does not match any of the ████████ company's current products. SCP-325 contains a semi-viscous green liquid, identical in chemical composition to the "Naturals" range of washing detergent sold by ████████. SCP-325 is a "Value pack" container of concentrated detergent, and currently contains 1,775 millilitres of fluid. One (1) wash of SCP-325 requires 25 ml of liquid, as indicated on the instructions located on the rear of the bottle. This information also contains a warning detailing [REDACTED]. SCP-325 functions in an identical way to a normal detergent, and when used will produce excellent results. Tests with Class-D personnel have indicated that victims will find the quality of the wash much higher than usual, therefore preferring to wear a garment washed in SCP-325 over other articles of clothing washed in normal detergent. However, lab tests have shown there to be no physical or chemical difference between garments washed in SCP-325 or other brands. Further research into low-level memetic threats are ongoing, but as the effects of SCP-325 are contained by non-use, SCP-325 is currently classified as Safe. When a garment washed in SCP-325 is worn, the subject wearing it will eventually succumb to extreme pervasive paranoid delusions related to mysophobia and cleanliness. This will often induce ritualistic behaviors in the subject, and has lead to subjects harming themselves through excessive cleaning methods such as placing their hands in boiling water or ingesting bleach. There are currently five levels of behaviour caused by SCP-325 exposure documented, with all tests past 480 total hours of exposure resulting in the [DATA EXPUNGED] indicated on the label, unless subject expires at Level 4, as documented below. All time measurements indicated in the following descriptions of behaviour after exposure are indicated at the average number of hours exposed, rounded up and +/-10%. "Exposure" refers to the time spent physically wearing garments cleaned in SCP-325. Level 1 Behaviour Subjects exposed to SCP-325 for between 1 and 24 hours will exhibit majorly increased awareness of hygiene and cleanliness. This is usually characterised by excessive hand washing and ordering others to be more clean themselves. This stage will usually pass without comment; however, any staff noticing increased awareness of cleanliness around the storage area of SCP-325 should inform Level-4 clearance personnel immediately. Level 2 Behaviour Subjects exposed to SCP-325 for between 24 and 96 hours will begin to display extreme mysophobia and manic washing regimens. Exposed subjects will also shun others, only exiting their domicile to stockpile supplies of tinned food and cleaning agents such as bleach. Interviews have shown that subjects view the outside world to be 'unclean'. Level 3 Behaviour Subjects exposed to SCP-325 for 96 to 240 hours exhibit complete disregard for anything that is considered by them to be unclean, including the outside world. If an object inside their abode can be cleaned by the subject, they will clean it until deemed suitably uncontaminated. All clothing that has not been washed in SCP-325 will also be rejected, and most likely destroyed along with other non-suitable items. Subjects will usually dispose of things by incineration, although no single method is preferred. From this point, only clothing washed in SCP-325 will be worn. Level 4 Behaviour Currently the stage of most use and interest to the Foundation. After 240 hours of exposure, subjects will cut themselves in order to use their blood as a cleaning agent. Other agents such as bleach will sometimes be added, but this is not a constant behaviour and around 80% of exposed subjects will not add anything. The blood from the victim has been proved to be 100% efficient at removing any contaminant from a surface. The mechanism for this is currently unknown, but tests with the products of SCP-███ and SCP-███ have shown promising results for cleanup after containment breaches. The composition of the blood has eluded a full analysis so far, with test results showing [DATA EXPUNGED] present in the bloodstream. Further testing is authorised after submitting form 325-T1 to the appropriate Level 4 researcher. Most test subjects (around 70%) will die of exsanguination or exhaustion before progressing to Level 5. Level 5 Behaviour Once a subject has been exposed for 480 hours they will proceed to [DATA EXPUNGED - SEE REPORT 325-E1] which resulted in the deaths of ██ civilians and █ Foundation staff. This event is detailed on the warning on SCP-325's label; a copy is available to researchers above Level 3 clearance. As the ████████ company shows no record of producing SCP-325, yet has the facility to do so if the [REDACTED] is added into their manufacture process, one undercover Agent has been inserted as an employee. Agent █████████ is to stay silent unless production of SCP-325 is found to exist. All instances of SCP-325 found outside of Foundation control are to be destroyed by incineration after testing at the nearest Foundation Site. Field Agents and MTFs are cleared to terminate any civilians exhibiting confirmed exposure of Level 3 or above. Confirmed Level 2 instances are to be contained and returned to the nearest Foundation Site.

SCP-1287 is a rectangular white marble structure located in ████████ within the state of Washington in the United States of America.

*** Item #: SCP-1287 Object Class: Safe Neutralized Special Containment Procedures: Due to the immovable nature of the object, Site 98 has been built around SCP-1287. The only persons permitted to make direct contact with the object are D-Class personnel. As of 16/04/1987, D-Class testing of SCP-1287 is to take place once every two (2) hours in between treatments of the object in order to observe any changes in SCP-1287's responses. Description: SCP-1287 is a rectangular white marble structure located in ████████ within the state of Washington in the United States of America. The object stands 3m in height, 10m in length, and 1m in width. SCP-1287 cannot be moved or altered in any way, including, but not limited to, graffiti, etching, and high-speed impact. At irregular intervals, the names of missing individuals will appear engraved into the structure. All the individuals currently existent on the structure have been confirmed missing or presumed dead. No person whose name appears on SCP-1287 has been noted to reappear. When a sapient organism makes physical contact with one of the names, that subject will report hearing a voice. When more than one name is touched, no anomalous effects can be observed. This phenomenon varies widely between people, apparently being roughly related to what that person considers to be pitiful or endearing. The voice will always administer the same message to the person: "This person’s family needs you. Will you give your life to help them?" If the person audibly responds positively, they will immediately be transfigured into the physical appearance of the person whose name they touched and are hereby designated as an instance of SCP-1287-A. The transfiguration appears to account for the physical growth of that person since their disappearance1. Additionally, the person's name will be removed from the face of the structure. These entities will also gain the memories and information regarding that person, including the events of their disappearance, as well as a strong urge to return to their family and/or loved ones. If allowed to do this, instances of SCP-1287-A will lose all sense of their former personality over the course of three (3) months and will eventually completely believe that they are the missing person2. All persons that were personally acquainted with the missing subject before the introduction of SCP-1287-A will show a noticeable lack of interest to that person's whereabouts during the period when they disappeared. Along with this, SCP-1287-A entities are very reluctant to share this information. However, if extensively questioned and confronted about their previous identity, these beings will often divulge information regarding the person's actual disappearance. Site Director's Note: At the moment, it appears that the names of at least fifty (50) Foundation personnel MIA are etched into SCP-1287. As such, the object may be used in order to discover the circumstances under which these personnel disappeared. Instances of SCP-1287-A created for this purpose are to be terminated after divulging the relevant information. -Site Director Loman Addendum-1287-Gamma: On 16/04/1987, approximately two (2) months after Foundation containment of SCP-1287, the anomaly began exhibiting delayed reaction to subjects touching the engraved names. Further research regarding SCP-1287 is ongoing to discover the source of this. Addendum-1287-Psi: On 16/08/1987 at approximately 1500h, all names etched into SCP-1287 spontaneously disappeared and the object ceased displaying anomalous properties. After this point, the structure was vulnerable to damage and alteration, as shown through the accidental damage caused when it fell off of the transport vehicle during its transfer to Analysis Site 53 for final examination of possible still existent effects. The object shattered when it fell, revealing a deceased male human within. This subject appeared to have died at a time corresponding to the cessation of SCP-1287’s effects. Furthermore, subsequent autopsy of the individual revealed the neurological structure often possessed by Type Red, Level 5 reality benders. Both the remains of SCP-1287 and the body have been sent to Analysis Site 53 for final examination. Addendum-1287-Omega: Analysis of the body found within SCP-1287 has found that the subject died from a combination of dehydration and starvation. Foundation personnel were also able to positively identify the man as ████ ███████, a benefactor who had often funded and raised money for missing persons programs, who had supposedly died seven (7) years earlier. Additionally, Foundation investigation of the remains of SCP-1287 revealed a message written on the interior of the structure, which read: I can feel that even my own power isn't going to keep me afloat for much longer I never thought that it would end I thought I was invulnerable But it doesn't matter, those people's families are happy now I did my part Footnotes 1. e.g. When D-28342 touched the name "Chloe McNaiman," who was reported missing eight (8) years earlier at the age of four (4), he became a twelve (12)-year-old girl. 2. Class A, C, and D amnestics have been shown to incur this same effect; however, Class B amnestics will cause complete amnesia in SCP-1287-A subjects, including the information they gained when first transfigured.

SCP-3196 is a temporal anomaly that affects the book series collectively known as The Adventures of Rex Dangerly, written by author Devon Brackenridge (POI-3196) and published by Penguin Random House.

*** Item #: SCP-3196 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: A month before an expected PUB-Event, Task Force Rho-4 (The Bookworms) is to obtain Penguin Random House's shipping manifest of all bookstores receiving shipments of the next Rex Dangerly book. This list is to be forwarded to all participating Foundation Mobile Task Forces. At the start of a PUB-Event, Foundation MTFs are to confiscate all SCP-3196-A instances. All civilian witnesses are to be given Class-B amnestics. All instances of SCP-3196-A are to be stored in standard Foundation security lockers. Description: SCP-3196 is a temporal anomaly that affects the book series collectively known as The Adventures of Rex Dangerly, written by author Devon Brackenridge (POI-3196) and published by Penguin Random House. The series follows the eponymous hero as he travels between various historical time periods and extraterrestrial locations. Instances of the second, third, fourth and fifth books in the series that were released before being written or published are labelled as SCP-3196-A-1-4 respectively. All SCP-3196-A instances bear the dedication; To the best of my fans, you know who you are. SCP-3196-A instances all contain publication dates ranging from 2008 to 2020. SCP-3196 causes the materialization of the remaining unwritten entries in The Adventures of Rex Dangerly on days when new entries in the series are to be officially published, known as a PUB-Event. Bookstores set to receive copies of the new entries will also receive instances of SCP-3196-A, depending on the volume being released. SCP-3196-A instances will typically manifest near already published books in the Rex Dangerly series, either on distribution shipments, or at bookstore shelves and storage rooms. Manifestation is instantaneous, and commonly goes unnoticed. SCP-3196 does not affect electronic book vendors, or secondhand bookstores. Addendum 3196-A-Series Overview SCP-3196-A Instance Title Current Status Publication Date None The Man and the Clocktower Published September 14, 2006 SCP-3196-A-1 The Tides of Neptune Published October 1, 2008 SCP-3196-A-2 Through the Wormhole In writing November 11, 2010 SCP-3196-A-3 A View From Alexandria Conceptual March 24, 2014 SCP-3196-A-4 The Man From Out of Time Conceptual January 18, 2020 Discovery-PUB-Event-01 On September 14th, 2006, bookstores that were set to receive shipments of the first Rex Dangerly book also received shipments of books purporting to be the next four entries in The Adventures of Rex Dangerly. An embedded agent of Task Force Rho-4 at Penguin Random House alerted the Foundation upon receiving multiple phone calls from confused bookstores. Foundation Agents stationed in POI-3196's hometown of Phoenix, Arizona were able to secure an interview with him under the guise of FBI fraud investigators. This interview, as well as one conducted with his editor at Penguin Random House, confirmed that no further entries in the Rex Dangerly series had currently been written. Using the publisher's shipping manifest for the first book's publication, Mobile Task Forces were able to raid all bookstores that had received shipments of SCP-3196-A. These instances were confiscated under a cover story which involved the use of FBI assets to disseminate a fictitious narrative containing an attempt to defraud POI-3196, Penguin Random House, as well as various bookstores through the use of fake Rex Dangerly sequels. Foundation literary analysts examining copies of SCP-3196-A were able to confirm the vocabulary and writing style matched that of previous works written by POI-3196, as well as matching the general content of the first Rex Dangerly book. All recovered instances were deemed to be non-anomalous. Follow-up interviews with both distributors and bookstore employees revealed wide ranging inconsistencies in recalling how SCP-3196-A instances were acquired. Subsequent use of amnestics was deemed sufficient to cover up Foundation involvement in the investigation and confiscation of SCP-3196-A instances. PUB-Event-02 On July 17, 2008, POI-3196 submitted his manuscript for the second book in the Rex Dangerly series, as well as his design for the cover art. Task Force Rho-4 was able to confirm that the content and cover was identical to that of SCP-3196-A-1. When October 1, 2008 was announced as the release date, plans for a second PUB-Event were drawn up. The Tides of Neptune was successfully released on October 1, 2008, triggering a PUB-Event. Foundation Task Forces, utilizing a similar strategy as the first PUB-Event, were able to contain all SCP-3196-A instances with minimal difficulty. SCP-3196-A instances contained during the second PUB-Event are identical to those contained during the first event. Addendum 3196-2- Plot Information Title: The Man and the Clocktower General Synopsis: Rex Dangerly is a member of the Universal Time Corps, responsible for the safe keeping of Space-Time. On a routine mission to 1870's London, Rex becomes embroiled in a plot to overthrow the Monarchy, destroy the Parliament, and establish a Retro-Soviet authoritarian state. The man responsible is revealed to be Olms Praetor, Rex's superior officer, who wishes to destabilize time itself in order to rewrite history. At their final confrontation on Big Ben, Rex fatally wounds Olms. Notes: The Man and the Clocktower is the first book in the series, and the only one not involved in SCP-3196. Title: The Tides of Neptune General Synopsis: Rex is assigned a case on Neptune, where it has been observed that the surface of the planet is undergoing unusual changes. Rex visits the colony of Armory, and witnesses a terraforming effort by an unknown alien entity. Tensions on Neptune between the corporate ruling committee and the rest of the civilian population come to a head, and civil war breaks out. The alien entity is destroyed by Rex as he tries to help restore order, but Neptune’s new climate destroys the colony, and Rex is sucked into space. Notes: Of note should be POI-3196's lack of knowledge regarding Neptune itself. Title: Through the Wormhole General Synopsis: Rex is rescued at the last second by a traveling merchant ship. Beyond Pluto, alien vessels emerge from wormholes, while Universal Time Corps ships amass near Neptune in an effort to repel them. The two sides commence hostilities as the aliens reveal themselves to be displaced humans from another dimension. The leader of the refugees is their version of Olms Praetor, who rallied the survivors after their own reality began to disappear due to an unknown being. Afterwords, a massive wormhole opens up and pulls all the fighters inside. Notes: A portion of the book describes "The Terra Collective", an organization allied with the Universal Time Corps that studies and collects anomalous artifacts and people. Deviation from the Foundation is significant, and is not considered a threat to collective secrecy. Title: A View From Alexandria General Synopsis: When both sides of the conflict are dragged into the newly created wormhole, they are greeted by future versions of Rex and Olms, who explain that the reality destroying entity is on his way to Rex's universe, where it will destroy conscious reality itself. Both Rex and Olms travel back to Ancient Egypt, where they hope to destroy the being before it can fully insert itself in their reality. As the entity begins to form, Rex receives a transmission from his future self, who explains he has already failed, before ceasing to exist. Notes: In one chapter, Rex encounters a wandering wise man, who offers him advice regarding his current conflict. Of note is the line: "One day, the guardsmen will come, and bind your history in chains, to safeguard their future". POI-3196 has been unable to explain the meaning behind this line, or a possible connection to the Foundation. Title: The Man From Out of Time General Synopsis: The reality destroying entity manifests, and reveals itself to be Rex. Time and space are destroyed, and Rex is flung into nothingness. Rex slowly becomes able to alter reality to restore the shattered timeline, but finds himself unable to stop his dimensional and historical counterparts from re-enacting his own actions, leading to the consistent destruction of reality. In a last ditch effort, Rex allows his former reality to reform, and then wills himself out of existence before he is forced to meet himself and Olms in Ancient Egypt. Space and time reform within this singular dimension, and history is implied to continue beyond its original stopping point. In the epilogue, an unnamed figure wakes up on the beach of an alien world. Notes: [See Below] Addendum-3196-3: SCP-3196-A-4 is the only entry in The Adventures of Rex Dangerly to contain a foreword. This is for you, who is no longer here. I regret that. You gave me the seed that this idea grew out of. I wrote it all, and the words flowed like magic. Sometimes you know something is right, something is meant to be. The pages in those books are, like Rex, now beyond time. I won't lie, I'm selfish enough to want this. But beyond my petty desires, sometimes things are just set in stone. I hope these stories provided some comfort. If the dead could read, I would write for them. - Devon Brackenridge

SCP-1430 is a staff carved from the wood of a Douglas Fir tree, measuring nearly exactly 115.

*** Item #: SCP-1430 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-1430 is to be stored in a security code locked container. Sustained exposure to SCP-1430 for longer than four consecutive hours is forbidden except for experimental purposes. Additionally, any personnel above a level 1 security clearance are expressly forbidden from making direct contact with the object of any kind. As of ██/██/2009, only D-class subjects are to be used for any experimentation. As of ██/██/2010, per directive by site command, experimentation with SCP-1430 is to be discontinued indefinitely. Description: SCP-1430 is a staff carved from the wood of a Douglas Fir tree, measuring nearly exactly 115.57 cm from end to end, and weighing 3.2 kg. Adorning the top of the staff is the seal of the University of ████████ (the original location of the object's retrieval), the figures of an adult man and woman breaking away from chains, and holding a lit torch, respectively. When SCP-1430 is held by a subject, they report being filled with a compulsion to speak on an academic subject they are well-educated in. If the subject lacks a formal secondary or higher education, they will instead feel compelled to speak on a subject that they personally believe themselves to be knowledgeable on. Virtually all subjects were compelled to speak after ten minutes of continuous exposure, and once a subject has begun speaking, they will continue to do so regardless of bodily requirements, ignoring hunger, dehydration, etc. This effect extends to any and all subjects who hold SCP-1430. After approximately one and a half hours of continuous speaking, the subject’s dialogue will slowly drift away from their original topic, and relate towards Methodist Christianity, regardless of the subject’s knowledge of the religion. Eventually, the subject will speak only on the topic of Methodism, specifically the teachings of one Rev. Dr. ████████, of the University of ████████, where the object was originally recovered. At this point, though they may actively resist separation, it is safe to remove SCP-1430 from the subject. After four to five hours of uninterrupted exposure, the subject will cease speaking on topics pertaining to Methodist Christianity, and instead lapse into describing a previously undocumented religion featuring violent sacrificial rites and practices. At this point, separating SCP-1430 from the subject will cause permanent psychological and neurological damage. + Show test log 1430 - Hide test log 1430 Test 1430-01 Subject: Dr. W██████ Duration: 20 minutes Results: Dr. W██████ gave a brief explanation of primate neurology and meme theory, the subject of her graduate thesis while attending university. Released SCP-1430 willingly on the request of researchers, though commented that she “wished she felt that confident seven years ago”. Test 1430-02 Subject: Dr. Y████ Duration: 45 minutes Results: Subject spent the duration describing his tenure at the SCP Foundation and how he acquired it, including details on his studies of SCP-███, ███, ████, and ███. At the 45 minute mark, when asked by researchers to set down SCP-1430, subject initially resisted, claiming he “hadn’t even gotten to how he [REDACTED]”, but relinquished after repeated verbal commands. Afterwards, subject expressed considerable distress at having openly and freely discussed classified materials. Tapes were destroyed, and individuals below the required security clearance who viewed the experiment were administered class-A amnestics. Dr. Y████ was not reprimanded. Test 1430-05 Subject: Agent H██████ Duration: 2 hour, 47 minutes Additional Info: Agent H██████ was introduced to the SCP Foundation through non-standard channels. Because of his upbringing, he never received formal education beyond the age of 9. Results: Agent H██████ spoke at length of his knowledge of combat exercises and training, as well as his experiences surviving in extremely adverse wartime conditions. After one hour and forty two minutes, subject touched on his knowledge of the Methodist church, how it related to his survival, and recommended it to the observing researchers. By two and a half hours, Methodism was the only topic of the subject’s speech. When asked to set SCP-1430 back down, subject remained unresponsive and continued speaking, even after several repeated direct orders. Security team instructed to forcibly remove subject from the test chamber. Subject actively and violently resisted having the object removed from his grip, and continued to speak despite fighting a group of 4 men. As soon as subject ceased contact with the object (as a result of being struck on the wrist), he expressed considerable confusion at his situation, claiming to not remember the previous altercation. Agent H██████ later revealed that he had no relationship with the Methodist church, and was in fact raised strictly Russian Orthodox. Test 1430-09 Subject: D-25102 Duration: 1 hour Additional info: Subject D-25102 is completely mute, as a result of having his tongue and vocal cords surgically removed eleven years ago to prevent the spread of oral cancer. Results: D-25102 does not attempt to use sign language (his preferred language) as is expected, but instead begins mouthing words with his lips, and flexing what remained of the muscles in his mouth and larynx. Subject was allowed to continue for an hour, before being ordered to stop. Subject expressed great agitation after releasing SCP-1430, claiming to have been able to hear his own voice again, and that he had spoken about the dangers of cigarette smoking for the duration. Several volunteers capable of lip reading were able to corroborate subjects’ claims. Test 1430-13 Subject: D-12405 Duration: 5 hours Results: Experiment proceeded normally for the first several hours. Subject at first spoke of setting up and executing pyramid schemes, before mentioning a successful email scam performed on a reverend of the Methodist faith after one hour, thirty two minutes of speech. (Note: Subject’s file indicated charges for a scam nearly identical to the one described, though the victim was not a reverend, nor a follower of any Christian doctrine at all). After three hours, the subject is speaking entirely on the topic of Methodism, specifically referring any listeners to the (deceased) Rev. Dr. ████████ for further guidance. After three hours and forty seven minutes, subject’s narrative takes an unexpected turn, no longer instructing listeners to seek guidance, but rather insisting on self-mutilation and other violent punishments for increasingly mundane actions, differing greatly from Methodist doctrine. After four hours, twenty three minutes the religious acts described by the subject no longer resemble any known existing or former religions, including elaborate human sacrifices taking place in temples carved from [DATA EXPUNGED]. When a security team was instructed to enter the testing chamber and remove SCP-1430, subject remained initially unresponsive until physical contact was made, at which point she immediately became enraged, violently resisting attempts to remove SCP-1430 from her possession. After being forced to drop the artifact, subject collapsed into unconsciousness and was taken to medical suite 28-N. D-12405 is currently in a vegetative state, showing brain activity consistent with a stroke victim. Test 1430-17 Subject: D-13742 Duration: ██ days, 4 hours, 15 minutes Additional Info: D-13742 was attached to an IV drip that allowed him to remain hydrated and fed for the duration of the experiment. Results: Experiment proceeded as expected for the first several hours. Subject spoke at length about his knowledge of hotwiring luxury cars, before lapsing into the expected pattern of Methodist teachings and the unknown religion described by previous subjects. After 10 to 11 hours of continuous exposure, the subject’s vocal chords began to clearly indicate stress, as the subject’s voice grows more difficult to comprehend. Similarly, subject’s lips and mouth are beginning to show signs of minor cuts and other damage, suspected to be from accidental bites. At this point, subject is believed to be describing the daily rituals of the followers of the unknown religion. After 23 hours of continuous exposure, D-13742 is effectively impossible to understand. Subject’s voice has given out entirely, and lip-reading is rendered virtually useless due to damage to the subject’s mouth and lips. Posture indicates heavy reliance on SCP-1430 to remain upright. Subject occasionally coughs and spits blood. After ██ hours of continuous exposure, subject is showing signs of near total exhaustion, and close to losing consciousness. Then, at exactly ██ hours, ██ minutes, and ██ seconds, subject immediately stands at attention, indicating none of the fatigue present mere seconds earlier, and speaks clearly and loudly in an unknown language, despite the obvious damage to subject’s mouth and throat. Subject’s voice is audible outside the testing chamber, rated as soundproof to 180 dB. Security team is instructed to enter the testing chamber and open fire on subject. [DATA EXPUNGED] containment procedures engaged [DATA EXPUNGED] 37 minutes later, using coordinated use of high explosives. Other than a layer of explosives residue, SCP-1430 remains undamaged. Subject D-13742 terminated. Notes: Following the incidents of test 1430-17, testing on SCP-1430 has been halted by site command. + Show Recovered Document 1430-A - Hide Recovered Document 1430-A Document 1430-A recovered from the office of ████ ████████ during SCP-1430's retrieval.

SCP-2360 is a set of three male humans who have been augmented internally with electronic systems of identical design.

*** Item #: SCP-2360 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: SCP-2360 instances are to be contained in cells shielded with a Faraday cage. Its containment site must be equipped with an EM interference generator in case of cage failure. Augmentations may be serviced by qualified personnel upon request. SCP-2360 are to be administered 2360 liquid feed in place of the standard humanoid SCP meal plan. Access to the standard humanoid meal plan is permitted at researcher discretion as incentives for good behavior. Access to system-link play or to SCP-2360's game discs may be revoked as punishment for unwanted behavior, at researcher discretion; however, it is much more compliant and sedentary when allowed these privileges. SCP-2360's local area network time is to be strictly scheduled. It may be given up to three hours per day, as a maximum of six days per week. Personnel engaged in play against SCP-2360 are to maintain a minimum 1:2 kill-death ratio against SCP-2360; those who fall below this threshold for more than one session will be replaced. If SCP-2360 begins to exhibit signs of an impending Nibbanic event, sever network connection immediately and execute the Upasana Procedure. Description: SCP-2360 is a set of three male humans who have been augmented internally with electronic systems of identical design. SCP-2360's primary augmentation is a set of custom-built packs fused to the spinal column which contain the components of an Xbox 360 video game console, disassembled and arranged to fit mostly within the body. Certain parts have been modified to increase console longevity; see SCP-2360 Component Log. Audiovisual data is transmitted subdermally to cochlear and ocular implants. The cochlear implants are internal, and not visible without use of scanning equipment;1 however, SCP-2360's eye sockets have been fully restructured to house artificial electronic eyes capable of HDMI interpolation. SCP-2360's irises contain light-emitting diodes that produce a green glow when the game console is activated; according to SCP-2360, this is a cosmetic effect. SCP-2360's wrists bear wrist-mounted prongs which end in controller inputs; these prongs fold back when not in use to allow freedom of movement. SCP-2360's palms and fingers are incapable of perspiration; this is compensated for, as the wrist-mounted input system also contains controls for a subdermal water-cooling system and for hair-sized muscle stimulation devices which are intended to provide increased reaction time. The augmentations receive power through integration with the digestive systems of the hosts, which have been modified. SCP-2360 is capable of sustaining life and operation indefinitely when administered sufficient amounts of a specially-formulated liquid feed, taken orally, which contains high-fructose corn syrup, caffeine, orange juice, sodium benzoate, and brominated vegetable oil, among other ingredients. SCP-2360's primary function is the operation of the game Call of Duty: Modern Warfare. In non-containment environments, it uses its consoles to access online multi-player functions and operates them continuously until it requires rest. During early use, SCP-2360 communicates among itself and with other players using an internal microphone; however, after between twenty minutes and one hour of playtime, instances of SCP-2360 become synchronized. At this point, game footage taken during testing shows the three players acting precisely in sync (concentrating fire, spotting concealed threats, etc.) without any apparent communication between them. When not connected to online services, SCP-2360 is capable of using wireless networking adapters to play over a local "system link" connection; however, synchronization is never achieved during local play. Initially, containment procedures prevented this behavior; after protests by SCP-2360, it was relocated to a different chamber within the site so that its augmentations can communicate with each other without allowing access to online services. Soon after this change, SCP-2360's demands to be allowed access to online play grew more severe, citing religious persecution. This culminated in refusal to consume meals, refusal to ingest liquid feed, and eventually direct biological and mechanical self-harm. Foundation personnel negotiated a compromise in which SCP-2360 is allowed limited, scheduled local area network (LAN) play against selected Foundation personnel. However, statements made by SCP-2360 indicate this may cause a Nibbanic event, based on success in-game; as a result, SCP-2360's opponents must be carefully selected, and countermeasures have been established. LAN privileges were initially granted on a probationary basis, but following a significant increase in SCP object compliance, the schedule has been extended indefinitely. Interview 2360-A Excerpt Interviewer: Tell me how you received these augmentations. SCP-2360-A: What, like, from the beginning? Interviewer: That would be preferable, yes. SCP-2360-C: We got invited to this youth program. SCP-2360-A: Yeah, Wallace brought us over. SCP-2360-C: At first we came for the free food, but after a few weeks, the church father's message spoke to us. SCP-2360-A: We realized we were broken. SCP-2360-B: Broken, and only God could heal us. Interviewer: God? SCP-2360-A: You've never heard of God? Interviewer: I'm asking which deity you're referring to. SCP-2360-C: …God, man. SCP-2360-B: He who has broken himself in our image. Interviewer: You're referring to The Church of the Broken God. SCP-2360-A: That's a name for it, yeah. SCP-2360-C: The father said his house was nondenominational, but it respected innovationist and integrationist doctrines. SCP-2360-A: Really focused on the present. Interviewer: Innovationist and integrationist? SCP-2360-A: Innovationism, it's like… God's in us. He's in you, too. So when we innovate, when we create new technology… SCP-2360-C: That's making a piece of him, bro. SCP-2360-A: That's bringing us closer. Hey, you an engineer? Interviewer: And what does "integrationist" mean? SCP-2360-C: Well, we've got to get as close to God as possible. SCP-2360-A: And if new technology is part of God… SCP-2360-B: That's how we can dedicate our bodies to him. Interviewer: And is that why you've been modified like that? SCP-2360-A: The father was like, "The time when you feel most at one with the machine, that's what you want to make a part of you." SCP-2360-C: And the four of us knew, it was when we played COD. SCP-2360-A: So here we are. Interviewer: The four of you? SCP-2360-C: Yeah, Wallace had it done, too. SCP-2360-A: But 360s have, like… a 25% failure rate. SCP-2360-B: He didn't talk to us much after that. Interview Log 2360-B Excerpt Interviewer: Why do you play this game constantly? [The interviewer points to one of SCP-2360's game discs, stored in a jewel case.] SCP-2360-C: It's how we're gonna transcend. SCP-2360-A: Like… meditation. Except epic. SCP-2360-C: Every point we score, we get closer. SCP-2360-A: Every match we win, that's a step away from meatspace. SCP-2360-C: We are the most pro that there has ever been. SCP-2360-A: The aimbot is— SCP-2360-C: —within us. SCP-2360-B: And we will reach heaven with no-scopes. SCP-2360-C: Except… Interviewer: Except? SCP-2360-C: We can't do it playing against each other. SCP-2360-B: We have to frag those who aren't in the clan. SCP-2360-C: Otherwise it's just practice. SCP-2360-A: It's lame. SCP-2360-B: There is no God in lame. SCP-2360-B: Should I tell them? SCP-2360-A: Don't, Kamal. Interviewer: I'm afraid we can't provide the agreed incentives if you withhold information from us. SCP-2360-A: Alright, alright. Go for it. SCP-2360-B: A couple months ago, some alarms started blaring, right? And we all saw this blinding red light, and when we turned our eyes back on, the doors and ceilings of our cells were halfway melted off. It smelled like maple syrup and ass. And Hunter, he says— SCP-2360-C: Well, I've tried to watch my language since I started becoming whole, but I said… "Shit, see if you can get on Live!" SCP-2360-B: All the guards were running after it, yelling "Someone turn off the main generator before the… the F-er finds it!" SCP-2360-A: So we managed to connect to the servers for a little team deathmatch. SCP-2360-C: But the servers were— SCP-2360-B: Barren. SCP-2360-A: We found someone and asked whether a new COD was out since we last connected. SCP-2360-C: He said there had been, like, six. SCP-2360-A: We looked for the bros we usually played with, but they were in different games. SCP-2360-C: And then the guy we had been talking to DC'd. SCP-2360-B: We didn't have time to change servers, so we just sort of… ran around the map while you carted us into our new cells. SCP-2360-A: Until the signal went out. Interviewer: Is that all? SCP-2360-A: What do you mean? Interviewer: Did you perform any other actions while connected to online services? Did you communicate with outside individuals about any subject other than Call of Duty? SCP-2360-C: Nope. SCP-2360-B: I didn't. SCP-2360-A: Neither did I. We were too busy trying to play. Interviewer: Noted. This will be verified, and if it's true, we may show leniency on you for your honesty and relative lack of activity during the breach. SCP-2360-C: Thanks, man. Can I just ask you one more thing? Interviewer: You may. SCP-2360-C: Is the new Xbox out? SCP-2360-A: The 720. SCP-2360-C: Or the 360 2, or— SCP-2360-B: The one after the one inside us, is what they're asking about. Interviewer: I'm afraid I can't divulge that information until I've cleared it with a supervisor. SCP-2360-C: That's— SCP-2360-A: Fine. SCP-2360-C: Totally fine. [END OF LOG] Footnotes 1. Possible methods include X-ray or ultrasound imaging. MRI is not feasible, for obvious reasons.

SCP-1786 is a coffee percolator.

*** Item #: SCP-1786 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-1786 is to be contained in a hermetically sealed chamber. The chamber is to be kept at 0% humidity at all times by use of Foundation type-9 dehumidifiers. SCP-1786 is to contain no water. In the event that the air of the chamber becomes at all humidified, or that SCP-1786 contains water, the chamber is to be evacuated of air, and all coffee produced by SCP-1786 is to be drained and discarded. Research is to focus on determining a method of preventing SCP-1786 from being powered. Attending personnel must be trained to fully believe that SCP-1786 is a coffee percolator. While the coffee produced by SCP-1786 is safe to drink under certain circumstances, doing so is discouraged. Description: SCP-1786 is, in substance, a standard ████████-brand electric coffee percolator, designed in 1999 and manufactured in 2000. Its design specifications detail a six-piece composition of stainless steel, copper and rubber which act to brew coffee by cycling water through coffee grounds. It is not possible to disassemble SCP-1786 or turn it off. Although materially it is a coffee percolator, in appearance SCP-1786 has all of the observable distinctions of a rowboat and its oars. It appears to measure 2.8 m long by 1.2 m wide, with oars 2.4 m long, and to be built from wooden timbers that have suffered slight degradation both before and after its construction. Visible water damage as well as an apparent lack of maintenance have led to discoloration and rotting along the underside of the hull. This seems to suggest that if SCP-1786 actually were a rowboat, it would not be seaworthy. Block lettering painted upon SCP-1786's bow gives its name as Rumford's Own; no such percolator has been found in any national ship registry. SCP-1786's form has not degraded further during its containment. Despite its altered appearance, SCP-1786's physical nature exists as an electric coffee percolator, and it performs the designated functions of such a device. Through an unknown process, SCP-1786 continuously condenses atmospheric moisture into its bottom chamber. When it has become filled with liquid water above a minimum level of 2 cm, SCP-1786 will brew it into a standard medium roast coffee, free of grounds. The coffee is chemically non-anomalous, smelling and tasting normal for percolated coffee. SCP-1786 is capable of completely cycling its brew once every two seconds while running, resulting in inordinately strong brews to the point of human caffeine toxicity within 40 minutes if no additional water is added. As the filtering basket is inaccessible, it is unknown what kind of coffee beans are used, or whether any are used at all. It is also unknown how it remains powered; however, traces on the Foundation power supply grid have reported that the nearest electrical outlet to SCP-1786 consistently draws 800 W more than can be explained by connected devices. As of ████-██-██, it has not been possible to keep SCP-1786 from obtaining electricity. As there is no limit to the amount of atmospheric moisture SCP-1786 can condense and brew, if exposed to the outside world it would eventually lead to an NK-class scenario involving the conversion of all available water into coffee. Addendum: SCP-1786 was recovered from ████████ Lake in ████ █████████, where significant environmental damage had been noted and was conjectured to be the result of a chemical spill. SCP-1786 was found on the southern shore overflowing with coffee, which had spilled into and polluted the lake, killing most of the aquatic fauna aside from a strain of algae which had adapted to metabolize caffeine. From documentation in the boathouse nearby, it was determined that SCP-1786 had been in its current location for 9 years. The boathouse, formerly owned by the ██████████ family but since abandoned, also contained SCP-1786's original packaging, which is appropriately sized for the rowboat which SCP-1786 resembles. The product description from said packaging is as follows: Rumford's Own by ████████ Goods Certain to add some perk to your life, Rumford's Own will wake you up and keep you afloat. At home or the office, its patented Redensafectory™ action makes sure that you'll never dry up during your busy day! Rumford's Own brings a smile to any face once filled with your favorite beans, and after going through the Mysterious Change, it'll bring you to any destination on the seven seas. Contents: one Rumford's Own coffee percolator When transportation was attempted, it was found that SCP-1786 can only be physically interacted with, i.e. moved, filled or emptied, if it is fully believed to be a coffee percolator despite all evidence to the contrary.

SCP-3115 is a set of standard audio headphones consistent with those manufactured in the early 21st Century.

*** Item Storage Locker at Site - ██. This locker is to be placed centrally within a containment cell measuring 5mx5mx5m and secured to the floor with standard steel bolts. The cell is to be lined with soundproofing material with an STC (Sound Transmission Class) rating of greater than 60. At no time should the USB of SCP-3115 be inserted into an electronic device except for the purpose of an approved test. All tests must be approved by no fewer than two Level 4 personnel stationed at Site-██ and the on-site 'Memetics Department'. TESTING HAS BEEN SUSPENDED PENDING POST-INCIDENT REVIEW BY ORDER OF THE DEPARTMENT OF SECURITY. SEE INCIDENT REPORT IR3115-A FOR FURTHER UPDATES Researchers wishing to observe testing with SCP-3115 may do so only with the aid of a video feed. No audio transmissions are permitted to leave the containment chamber whilst testing is in progress due to risk of containment breach (See Testing Log). Description: SCP-3115 is a set of standard audio headphones consistent with those manufactured in the early 21st Century. The headphones contain no external markings and show signs of slight use. The headphone portion of SCP-3115 is 'plugged in' with a standard double ended USB cable which was present with SCP-3115 at acquisition. When connected to an electronic device via the USB connector, SCP-3115 will begin to play audio snippets from various radio stations from around the world. Testing has confirmed that the radio broadcast from SCP-3115 matches that which the particular station it is tuned to is broadcasting at the time. To date, no technology capable of receiving said signals has been found in or on SCP-3115 and its means of receiving these signals is unknown. SCP-3115's anomalous effect manifests when a human being places the headphones over his ears and connects SCP-3115's USB to any electronic device (The device's ability to transmit audio data appears irrelevant, SCP-3115's anomalous properties would manifest even if connected to a USB compatible charger). When a human subject places SCP-3115 over his ears a noticeable change in the audio output will occur. The subject will continue to hear broadcasts from a random radio station, however all talking, singing and other vocalizations will now be narrated by an unknown male sounding entity known as SCP-3115/A. SCP-3115/A is described as talking with a formal English accent and has a seemingly jovial tone. SCP-3115/A will continue to narrate and sing all content broadcast from the radio station currently being broadcast by SCP-3115 in real time for approximately 15 minutes of use. SCP-3115/A will continue to narrate broadcast audio after 15 minutes of SCP-3115 being worn by a human subject, however will now include additions to the standard broadcast. The anomalous effect of SCP-3115 ceases when the headphones are removed from the human subject and the voice of the transmission will return to that of the DJ/Artist. + Level 4 Clearance Required - Clearance Accepted Addendum 3115/01: After 15 minutes have elapsed with a human subject listening to SCP-3115/A, SCP-3115/A will make additions to the standard broadcast. SCP-3115/A will at random appear to say words, phrases, and describe abstract concepts which almost without exception prove to be cognitohazardous to the human subject listening. Subjects which are exposed to the cognitohazardous vocalizations of SCP-3115/A will begin to display symptoms immediately. Symptoms increase drastically depending on the amount of vocalization additions heard. Once the original 15 minutes has elapsed there appears to be no correlation to the frequency of further additions. Number of Additions Heard Effect on Subject 1 Subject experiences visual hallucinations of varying content and severity. A consistent theme appears to be the perception of a humanoid entity standing within the room they are currently in. Subjects will perceive the audio being output by SCP-3115 as coming from this entity. Subjects universally report the early stages of a migraine at this stage. 2-4 Subject experiences symptoms from previous additions. Subjects also report the apparent inability to remove SCP-3115 from their heads or unplug it from the electronic device. Physical intervention at this stage in removing SCP-3115 from the head of a subject will cause the symptoms to abate within 1 hour. 3-5 Subject experiences symptoms from previous additions. Subjects also report seeing symbols on the walls, floor and ceiling of an unknown language. These symbols cause extreme pain in those who observe them and are capable of causing subjects to lose consciousness. 6+ Subjects expire within seconds of hearing a sixth addition. Prior to expiration subjects begin to involuntarily vocalize the cognitohazardous additions they have so far heard. This is capable of spreading the cognitohazard to further individuals. Given the rapid vocalizations of the subject at this stage, the propagation of the hazard is extremely fast and further infected individuals will enter the latter stages of infection in moments. + Show Testing Log -Hide Testing Log Test 3115-01 Subject: D-88743 Procedure: D-88743 is directed to enter the containment chamber and plug SCP-3115 into a provided USB portable power pack and remain within the room for 5 minutes. D-88743 is not directed to wear SCP-3115. Results: D-88743 follows instructions and reports faintly hearing a broadcast consistent with BBC Radio 1's morning show coming from SCP-3115. Note, D-88743 is near to SCP-3115. but is not wearing it. D-88743 disconnects SCP-3115 from the power pack and exits the chamber without incident. Analysis: Site-██ is shielded from all outside broadcasts. Audio output is later confirmed to be consistent with BBC Radio 1, however the means in which SCP-3115 has detected this signal is unknown. Test 3115-02 Subject: D-88743 Procedure: D-88743 is directed to enter the containment chamber and plug SCP-3115 into a provided USB portable power pack. D-88743 is instructed to wear SCP-3115. D-88743 is permitted to leave the containment chamber after 5 minutes as per previous test. Results: D-88743 follows instructions exactly. Upon wearing SCP-3115, D-88743 removes SCP-3115 stating surprise at hearing SCP-3115/A instead of a standard broadcast. D-88743 is instructed to place SCP-3115 on his head again, which he does without argument. After 5 minutes has elapsed, D-88743 unplugs SCP-3115, removes them from his head and leaves the containment chamber. Analysis: Audio output matches that of WKCS-FM. D-88743 is placed in observations for one week following test but shows no negative effects. D-88743 expresses reluctance to partake in further tests claiming that the voice of SCP-3115/A 'unnerved him'. Test 3115-03 Subject: D-88743 Procedure: D-88743 is instructed to follow procedures as per Test 3115-02 however is instructed to remain within the containment chamber, wearing SCP-3115 for 16 minutes. Results: Upon passing the 15 minute mark, D-88743 stands and appears panicked. D-88743 asks Research Staff how 'that guy' has been able to get into the room without using the only door (which was locked as part of testing procedures). Upon passing the 16 minute mark, D-88743 leaves the containment chamber complaining of a headache. Analysis: D-88743 reports seeing the manifestation of SCP-3115/A. D-88743 is extremely paranoid following this test and has shown an aversion to wearing any form of headphones again. D-88743 was treated in the medical bay for a migraine and was placed under observation. During this time, D-88743 spoke aloud the cognitohazardous phrase he had heard from SCP-3115/A, exposing a member of medical staff to Stage 1 infection. Class A amnestics proved effective in neutralizing infection in both persons. D-88743 is terminated as per standard D-Class protocols at the end of the month. Test 3115-04 Subject: D-4452 Procedure: D-4452 is instructed to follow procedures as per Test 3115-02 however is instructed to remain within the containment chamber, wearing SCP-3115 until instructed otherwise. Results: D-4452 follows instructions exactly. D-4452 expresses similar symptoms to D-88743 after the 15 minute mark. At 23 minutes 6 seconds following activation of SCP-3115, D-4452 begins convulsing in his seat and speaking unintelligibly (now believed to be in Stage 6 infection). D-4452 rapidly begins vocalizing cognitohazardous phrases before expiring. During this test, 5 Research Staff were observing the test using both a visual and audio feed. All five personnel were infected immediately with Stage 6 infection on hearing the cognitohazard. This quickly spread to security personnel stationed outside. A containment breach was declared and all personnel removed from within earshot of infected persons. SCP-3115 was removed from D-4452's head with the assistance of Researcher Tann who is declared medically deaf. Post-mortem examination of infected personnel deduced the cause of death to be cardiac arrest. Analysis This test caused a site-wide containment breach to be declared. A follow up investigation has lead to the current containment procedures. Testing to be indefinitely suspended pending a review by the Department of Internal Security. + Show Incident Report IR3115-A - Hide Incident Report IR3115-A INCIDENT REPORT IR3115-A On the 4th April 2017, SCP-3115 underwent its first site-wide containment breach since containment was first established. This item had been considered relatively safe by research staff given its manageable anomalous properties and as such, major liberties were taken in containment of SCP-3115 resulting in less than safe conditions. At 04:20hrs on 4th April 2017, five members from the Department of Research at Site-XX commenced Test 3115-04. This test was sanctioned by the Site Memetics Department in accordance with Foundation Policy and conformed to all containment procedures hitherto established. All personnel involved were experienced researchers with a variety of backgrounds in science and this was the fourth such test that this team had undertaken with SCP-3115. The experiment required the use of one D-class personnel designated D-4452. The aim of the test was to establish the effects of prolonged exposure to the anomalous properties of SCP-3115 on human test subjects and the subsequent effectiveness of Class A amnestics on said subjects. Prior to this test, no test subject had been exposed to the anomalous properties of SCP-3115 for more than 16 minutes. At the time the containment chamber was structurally sound, with sound proofing remaining at 100% effectiveness throughout the test. The cell was fitted with 3 standard HD CCTV cameras providing a view of all angles of the room. These cameras were fitted with standard audio microphones which could be switched on and off by the personnel in the observation booth. At the commencement of the test, all cameras and microphones were activated by the research staff to document and monitor the test as it progressed. As per standard protocols for testing on SCP-3115, all microphones were altered to only pick up loud and deliberate sound in the room, so as to prevent accidental recording of SCP-3115’s anomalous audio. At 23 minutes and 6 seconds after the commencement of the test, D-4452 began exhibiting symptoms of Stage 6 Infection of SCP-3115. D-4452 convulsed in an apparent epileptic fit for 1 minute and 32 seconds, falling from his chair in the process. It has been found that the research staff made several errors at the commencement of Stage 6 infection. At the time that D-4452 entered the advanced stage, audio recording was disabled on the microphones. In an attempt to communicate with D-4452 to enquire as to his wellbeing and in order to gather more information of the current exposure, one of the researchers activated the microphones on the cameras. A two way communication was then opened which exposed all five personnel in the observation booth to immediate Stage 6 infection of SCP-3115. The observation booth itself was not sound proofed as it was outside of SCP-3315’s containment chamber. Due to the volume of the researcher’s subsequent vocalisations, the sound permeated through the gaps in the door frame and exposed the two security guards stationed outside. Their vocalisations was then picked up by the CCTV cameras in the hallway which transmitted the infection to the Camera Control Operator in the Security Command Centre. The infection then spread throughout a small portion of the facility before the event was witnessed by a member of staff through a non-audio CCTV camera. This staff member then activated the Site’s containment breach alarm and established contact with Security stationed outside of the Containment Wing. At this time the Site’s computer mainframe underwent an automatic assessment of the situation and updated the Site Director, informing him that the containment breach did not meet the required parameters for detonation of on-site warheads. A further error in containment then occurred whereby further Security personnel entered the Containment Wing in order to re-establish containment, further spreading the infection to those personnel. Site records indicate that proper safe working protocols were not followed by staff at the site during this containment breach. Standard operating procedures for an auditory anomaly undergoing containment breach states that Mobile Task Force Eta 11 – ‘Savage Beasts’ must be informed immediately. This procedure was not followed and MTF-Eta 11 were not informed until 14 minutes and 44 seconds after the activation of the containment breach alarm. It is fortunate that Site-XX was home to personnel who are medically declared deaf. Researcher Tann in this case, had no previous experience working with SCP-3115 and was employed in a primarily back-office role. Notably, Researcher Tann only holds Level 1 Security clearance as a newer member of staff and as such was not authorised to be informed of the nature of SCP-3115 or even enter the Containment Wing. This breach of protocol is to be referred to the Department of Internal Security. Researcher Tann was able to successfully remove SCP-3115 from the head of D-4452 and eject the USB from the socket, terminating the anomalous properties of SCP-3115. Using a decibel meter, Researcher Tann then confirmed that all personnel affected by SCP-3115 had expired prior to signalling the all clear. Standard site operations resumed at 13.40hrs that day. The incident resulted in the following casualties: 1x D-Class personnel 12x Research personnel 10x Security personnel 3x Clerical personnel 1x Janitorial personnel The details of this report have been forwarded to the Committee for Post Incident Analysis and Mobile Task Force Eta 11 for their comment and endorsement. I await their response before submitting my findings to the Department of Administration in a Post Incident Review. Colonel H. Briggs Incident Review Bureau Department of Security Addendum 3115-02 : Notes on Acquisition SCP-3115 was acquired by The Foundation in 2006 when the object was discovered sitting on the approach road to Site-19 by Research Staff on their way to work. A review of the CCTV footage from around Site-19 shows an unknown male walking into the middle of the approach road from out of the surrounding woodlands before placing SCP-3115 down on the tarmac. CCTV from inside the wooded area where the male appeared does not show the male or any other traces of human life in the area and no breaches of the outer perimeter fence were discovered. The male disappeared back into the woods moments before the personnel discovered the item. Note from Researcher Katash An excerpt from the CCTV footage captured at the acquisition of SCP-3115 was shown to D-88743 prior to his termination. He has confirmed my suspicions that the male who delivered the SCP to us matches the description of SCP-3115/A. Given that SCP-3115/A is likely a real individual and more than likely the creator of SCP-3115, his capture and interrogation are of high priority. We need to know this guy's motives, after all we could have just brought a memetic weapon straight into one of our facilities. Recommend improved screening of all such 'deliveries' in the future - Researcher Katash

SCP-278 is a large mechanical robot made of steel, iron, and banyan wood, strongly resembling Idiops barkudensis, a type of Indian arachnid.

*** Item #: SCP-278 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: Without any input into its controls, SCP-278 will construct its web in any dimly lit, large open area, preferring high 90 degree tri-corner roosts spanning 300 cubic meters. Those personnel at its controls report that the ease of piloting SCP-278 appears inconsistently simple in comparison to the complexity of the mechanisms involved and the lack of any electronic guidance. Description: SCP-278 is a large mechanical robot made of steel, iron, and banyan wood, strongly resembling Idiops barkudensis, a type of Indian arachnid. Clear signs that SCP-278 has been "upgraded" or "modernized" recently have been found. Core mechanisms and frame of the body are dated back some 150 years to the [EXPUNGED] period. Many new engineering components have been added by unknown parties. Hydraulics and servos seem to have replaced what were systems of pulleys and gears driven by steam engines. The average length of SCP-278 is about 16.5 m (54 ft) from the opisthosoma (abdomen) to the tip of the furthest leg and the highest part of the main body sits about 8.2 m (27 ft) off the ground. A control panel of levers and pedals are positioned at what would be the mid-cephalothorax on the back of SCP-278. Again, numerous modifications have been made to the control panel, actually simplifying the control scheme into a more conventional "flight stick and throttle" configuration. Though SCP-278 lacks any electronics, CPU, or wiring beyond the presence of a few dozen car batteries, the complex motions of multipedal locomotion are fully automated through a complex network of looping tethers, compound pulleys, belts, and hydraulic pistons. The oldest functioning component of SCP-278 is a type of "processing transmission" relying on multiple rotating perforated drums and coils providing different instructional input for commands of motion. A human operator working the controls essentially "shifts gears" to readjust the configuration and position of the control drums and coils which guide the rhythm of motion to the legs essential for moving SCP-278. Though the finer details that control SCP-278 are not fully understood, researchers are perplexed by the autonomy SCP-278 displays when no human input is presented. It is not known how SCP-278 is capable of moving and performing complex tasks on its own without an operator, the most impressive of which is the construction of an elaborate "web" made from nylon tether, similar to bungee cord, with high tensile strength. The cords are constantly stored and reused since the discovery of SCP-278, the typical web having a diameter of about 41 m. Addendum: SCP-278 escaped confinement on the 2nd of September 2008 when SCP-███ breached its own containment, disabling the facility located at [EXPUNGED]. During the night, SCP-278 had traveled [EXPUNGED] km to Liverpool, England, where it was found, poised vertically upside down on the side of a building known as Concourse House. SCP personnel posing as a theatrical group introduced SCP-278 to citizens as "La Princesse," the showcase of a theatrical production. With human operators at the controls, SCP-278 was paraded around the city under the guise of a show.

SCP-3202 is a shared memory of a particular individual, designated SCP-3202-1, eating an acquaintance's pet while the animal was still alive.

*** Item #: SCP-3202 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: D-78818 is exempt from any scheduled termination or transfers, and may be kept in a standard low-threat humanoid containment cell. Footage of D-78818 swallowing Junior Researcher Pitt's pet goldfish is available to all personnel with 1/3202 clearance. Personnel affected by SCP-3202 are encouraged to rewatch the footage should they ever experience doubt that the event occurred. Witnesses to SCP-3202 are not permitted to consume live animals. Description: SCP-3202 is a shared memory of a particular individual, designated SCP-3202-1, eating an acquaintance's pet while the animal was still alive. SCP-3202 only affects individuals who would have witnessed the event were it to occur (hereby "witnesses"); SCP-3202-1 is not affected. Each SCP-3202 manifestation occurs in distinct stages. During Stage 1, witnesses will possess a shared memory of the event described above. These memories are vivid and mutually consistent, regardless of the supposed time since the event or the mental states of the witnesses. Stage 2 begins when a witness ceases to believe these memories of the event.1 SCP-3202's fidelity will decrease for each witness that ceases to believe the memories; after this occurs for about half of the witnesses, SCP-3202 becomes indistinguishable from an imaginary event. Stage 3 occurs once SCP-3202 is only believed by one witness. The active instance of SCP-3202 will cease to exist, with all falsified memories being eliminated. SCP-3202 will then reoccur, changing in form, with the remaining witness becoming the new SCP-3202-1. Individuals who are exposed to several iterations of SCP-3202 often cease to display interest in the falsified memories and are typically quick to dismiss them; whether this is a natural reaction or a facet of SCP-3202 itself is unclear. Recovery: The circumstances resulting in SCP-3202's creation are unclear; SCP-3202-related activity was first identified in San Francisco, CA among the administration of the ███████ Company on 2017-04-19. SCP-3202 went through an estimated nineteen iterations before its operational parameters were delineated by the Foundation. SCP-3202's current containment procedures were formulated under the hypothesis that, if SCP-3202-1 participated in an event consistent with SCP-3202's parameters, the false memories would align with this event; subsequently, subjects would not find reason to disbelieve in SCP-3202, and it would thus remain stable. To this end, a witness to an SCP-3202 manifestation was recruited as D-Class Personnel #78818. D-78818 was introduced to Junior Researcher Pitt, then provided with JR Pitt's pet goldfish. He complied with an instruction to swallow the goldfish. Immediately thereafter, all other witnesses were provided information that disproved the active manifestation of SCP-3202. SCP-3202 demanifested, then reoccurred as a shared memory indistinguishable from the actual event of D-78818 swallowing the goldfish. This containment attempt is considered a success, and forms the basis of current containment procedures. Addendum: A standard psychological review performed in June of 2017 has found that all personnel who witnessed SCP-3202 regard the memories associated with it as particularly enjoyable, recalling the event frequently and often experiencing dreams related to it. Subjects report deriving pleasure from the unambiguous truth of SCP-3202, as well as the imagined sensation of swallowing goldfish. Several expressed interest in performing similar acts. SCP-3202 has been upgraded to Euclid. All witnesses are to be monitored for further anomalies. Footnotes 1. Most commonly, the witness acquires or recalls evidence that the pet in question was alive at some point after the supposed event. As SCP-3202 does not include memories of events leading up to or resulting from the pet's consumption, the incongruency with other documented events may result in disbelief. Thoughtful evaluation of the implausibility of the event has also been noted to cause this effect; this occurs more often when the pet in question is particularly large or when SCP-3202-1 is particularly small.

SCP-3262 is a bright red species of parasitic plant consisting of radially-arranged vines coated in luminescent seedpods about 2.

*** Item #: SCP-3262 Object Class: Keter Special Containment Procedures: Two protocols for the handling of subjects exposed to SCP-3262 are permissible: Artificial fortification of the subject's memories of SCP-3262, followed by the provision of incentives or conditioning such that they do not disclose this information. Termination. The selection between these protocols should be performed in short order and on a case-by-case basis. Individuals who have been exposed to SCP-3262 should not be assigned an amnestic regimen that could potentially remove their memories of SCP-3262, except for testing purposes. Any reports matching SCP-3262's description, as well as any reports of contagious unusual behavior without an obvious cause, should be investigated immediately. If SCP-3262 involvement is indicated, the surrounding area should be quarantined pending an assessment of the extent of its spread and the destruction of all SCP-3262 instances. SCP-3262 disposal is best achieved by the liberal application of a strong caustic solution such as lye, and should generally be performed on-location if at all possible. Description: SCP-3262 is a bright red species of parasitic plant consisting of radially-arranged vines coated in luminescent seedpods about 2.0cm in diameter. SCP-3262 diverges dramatically from typical plant biology — rather than engage in photosynthesis, SCP-3262 is adapted to use thermal energy to process the consumption of living animal tissues. Presumably as a result of this adaptation, SCP-3262 does not possess roots, leaves, or other structures that typically aid plants in photosynthesis. SCP-3262 is capable of enduring temperatures of 900°C on a consistent basis in all life stages; the source of this heat resistance is unclear. SCP-3262's life cycle is dominated by the Seed Stage, wherein SCP-3262 seeds (which average 0.3mm in diameter) are inhaled by a human en masse, traversing into the bloodstream through the lungs and mechanically penetrating the blood-brain barrier. The seeds will extend microscopic filaments up to 9cm in any direction, then fall dormant. SCP-3262's seeds can remain dormant in the human brain indefinitely; apart from mild headaches shortly after infection, SCP-3262 infection is asymptomatic. The Seed Stage is only known to end when the host forgets about their initial encounter with SCP-3262; past this point, the host's death will not impede the progression of SCP-3262's life cycle. Due to the sudden and violent nature of the events that follow, the mechanisms dictating the Explosive Stage is unclear, but it is known to involve the rapid conversion of brain tissue into combustible hydrocarbons and oxygen gas, causing convulsions and mental degradation, followed by unconsciousness, within ten seconds. An internal source of uncertain nature then ignites the hydrocarbon mixture, resulting in the violent detonation of the host's head and the growth of SCP-3262. The Reproductive Stage immediately follows the Explosive Stage. About 40% of the mass of the host's head is consumed by SCP-3262 during the explosion and is quickly digested and converted into plant matter, resulting in a cluster of plants up to 2.3 kilograms in total mass that extends up to 1.2 meters in any direction. SCP-3262's seedpods will slowly fill with a mixture of volatile hydrocarbons presumably similar to the ones responsible for the Explosive Stage. During this stage, it is believed that SCP-3262 relies on several cues — notably, physical disturbance, increased atmospheric moisture and carbon dioxide levels, and changes in ambient heat — to detect the presence of humans nearby; if a human comes within ~0.6 meters of SCP-3262 without proper protection, several of SCP-3262's seedpods will explode. While this is generally insufficient to cause serious injury, it results in the dispersal of SCP-3262's seeds over a wide area, with the exact dispersion patterns relying largely on local air currents. The heat from these explosions is also used to enable the further consumption of the original host's corpse. Due to SCP-3262's reliance on high temperatures to gather sustenance, it will starve and begin to rot within 2-5 days if not regularly exposed to fire, or if its seedpods are not induced to explode. History: The earliest historical records consistent with SCP-3262 originate in 660 CE in Constantinople, which describe it as being recovered from an outbreak in Athens; however, no other records of this outbreak have been found. SCP-3262's time and place of origin are, consequently, unknown. A method of cultivating SCP-3262 was apparently developed by the Byzantine military, which harvested its seedpods for use in the creation of the incendiary weapon known as "Greek fire".1 It is believed that by ~900 CE, an alternative method of creating Greek fire was devised and SCP-3262's use in the process was forgotten, as SCP-3262 is described in documentation from this time period in unfamiliar terms. Documentation of SCP-3262 is scarce; while this can be attributed in part to its potentially decades-long incubation periods, the exact reason for its limited presence in the historical record is unknown, particularly given its dramatic behavior in the Explosive and Reproductive stages. It is known that SCP-3262 has existed in most regions of Europe at one point or another, with its presence at a minimum during the Early Middle Ages and at a maximum during the Renaissance, though its exact extent is highly uncertain. Most records describe SCP-3262's appearance as unprecedented and unexplained; only in rare cases was its contagious nature identified. Notably, SCP-3262 outbreaks consistently track with the "dancing mania"2 that occurred between the 7th and 17th centuries in Europe, usually (but not exclusively) afflicting direct participants and observers of these events. Participants would generally either attempt to destroy SCP-3262 or ignore it entirely. In several cases, SCP-3262 and the host's corpse were retrieved by participants not known to the local population and carried away for unknown reasons. Between 100 and 1,000 deaths during dancing mania outbreaks are attributable to SCP-3262. Of note is that controlled experiments have failed to detect any mind-affecting properties in SCP-3262, or any other mechanism that could account for its coincidence with dancing mania. A causal relationship between SCP-3262 and dancing mania is presumed to exist, but its nature is unknown. The requirement that the host forget their encounter with SCP-3262 was discovered during early experiments with Class-A amnestics by an unnamed Foundation precursor organization based in Munich in 1780, when administration resulted in the immediate progression of SCP-3262 to its Explosive Stage in two test subjects. SCP-3262 was recognized as a distinct phenomenon several years thereafter upon consultation with historical records, and initial containment procedures were devised shortly thereafter. The extent to which SCP-3262 is properly contained is unclear, though it is believed to be significantly less prominent than it was in 1780, and likely constitutes less than 3,000 yearly cases. The relevant analysis of records detailing SCP-3262 containment operations is currently postponed. Footnotes 1. This information has since been expunged from the historical record. 2. Events in which large groups of individuals would dance erratically to the point of exhaustion, often exhibiting other bizarre behaviors as well. These activities were often contagious, and are generally considered partially attributable to mass hysteria. Numerous such events occurred across Europe, particularly between the 14th and 17th centuries, and are well-documented in contemporary sources.

SCP-4432 is a heavily modified humanoid entity possessing multiple anomalous properties, measuring 165cm tall and weighing 54kg.

*** Item #: SCP-4432 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: SCP-4432 is currently contained in a padded and soundproofed room within Site-55's Euclid containment wing. Description: SCP-4432 is a heavily modified humanoid entity possessing multiple anomalous properties, measuring 165cm tall and weighing 54kg. SCP-4432's modifications include: a detachable metal fish head, a candy dispenser replacing the trachea, a small CRT television protruding from its chest, an ethernet cable in place of genitals which connects to a network named "intrenet", five USB C charging cables protruding from the navel, a Triple A battery pack located on the upper back; empty, small tools such as a knife, spork, scissors, etc replacing the fingers, a lightbulb replacing the nose, which glows red when a lie is told within 3 meters of it, a liquid soap dispenser extending from the top of the spine, roller skates in place of feet, and a lunar calendar pinned to its mid-back. SCP-4432 constantly produces vocalizations and appears to be aware of its surroundings, but is unable to reliably communicate with Foundation personnel. A temporary tattoo reading "mr mister® by dado " was found on the subject's lower back upon initial discovery, but has since faded. The subject has been identified as Ricardo Trujillo, a construction worker from Albuquerque, New Mexico who was reported as missing on December 26th, 2019 after responding to a Craigslist ad for a "human pig of guinea (pay good cash)[sic]". Addendum 4432.1: Recovered Document The following document was found glued to the TV on SCP-4432's chest. wow you has find mr mister by dado, limited time only item from dado dado is see how swiss are make knife and spoon and scissor into army knife of swiss and dado is think 'hmmm perhaps consolidate is best for dado as well' so dado is look at the small misters of dr wanderingtrain and say 'why have multiple when dado can instead be into making army swiss mister' congratulations you are become collector person, dado is not judge of gender preference unlike doctor wundertaint who is much lawyery and mean Addendum 4432.2: Recovered Text Messages The following communications were recovered from Mr. Trujillo's phone, presumably occuring prior to becoming SCP-4432. Log 1 December 24th, 2019 2:34 PM did u buy the doll for Alejandra yet?? no i had to use the money i cannot fucking believe you, ricky i give u one fucking errand and u cant even do that right what did u spend the money on this time?? actually forget it. i dont want to know. christa im sorry i had bills i knew my mom was right about u. i dont care what u do, just make sure u buy the gd doll for alejandra or i will make sure you never have custody again okay ill bring you the doll tomorrow ill figure something out u fuckin better. Seen 2:44 PM Log 2 December 24th, 2019 3:02 PM hey i wanted to ask about your clist ad how much are you paying? hello yes dado is pay good moneys okay but how much exactly? theres something i need to theres something i need to buy so I really need to know how much youre paying what it is you are of needing i need to buy my daughter this expensive doll for christmas or my exwife isnt going to let me see her again. please stop jerking me around and tell me how much youre going to pay dude dado is not of jerking, dado is fine entrepreneur and expert maker of toy better than mattel and dogtor wanderyman. maybe dado can assistance you with expensive luxury doll youre saying you can make me one of those fancy dolls? dado can make u toy yes okay cool forget the cash, just do that ok u come see dado at 53 colombus drive south east1 be there in an hour seen 3:09 pm Log 3 December 24th, 2019 3:56 PM hey i found a clist gig that will help me get the doll. im meeting the guy now. ok tell allie ill see her tomorrow for christmas okay ok im sorry this happened idc merry christmas christa Seen 3:58 PM Footnotes 1. The location was found to be empty following a Foundation inspection.

SCP-011 is a Civil War memorial statue located in Woodstock, Vermont.

*** Item SCP-011 and the area surrounding it are to be cleaned once every day. For safety purposes, cleaning should start at least 30 minutes after sundown. Cleaning should always be performed by at least two (2) personnel, who are also advised to note anything unusual about the item or the debris cleaned up. In a situation where the item cannot be cleaned for more than two (2) days, local residents must be contacted and instructed not to approach the item. [Containment procedures nullified 2004] Description: SCP-011 is a Civil War memorial statue located in Woodstock, Vermont. The statue is the image of a young male soldier holding a musket at his side, and is carved out of granite quarried within the area. Occasionally, SCP-011 has been observed lifting its musket to the sky to fire at birds which attempt to land or defecate on it. Reports detail that its movements produce soft grinding sounds but do not cause it any structural failure. Oddly, the gunfire is very similar to that of a standard firearm, despite observations that the item only loads granite bullets and granite powder into the musket (which is also unharmed by the firing). In spite of its efforts, some fecal matter does manage to strike SCP-011, and it has reportedly become distressed when it has had a large amount of feces on it, on some rare occasions even firing at humans. Addendum: Those assigned to maintain SCP-011 are to see document #011-1 for instructions. Document #011-1: Maintenance Brief [Document archived 2004 - accessible to personnel with security clearance 2/011 or higher] Additional Information: SCP-011's seeming sentience has increased since the first report of activity in 1995. As of 2004, the item's containment procedures have been dropped but it remains under constant observation. Recorded below are landmark events in its activity. Timeline: 3.12.1995 - Woodstock resident reports the statue's eyes moving, first sign of activity 9.30.1995 - Statue shoots musket for the first time 10.9.1995 - Statue begins shooting birds from the sky 1.25.1996 - Registration as SCP-011, containment procedures begin 4.14.1997 - SCP-011 observed moving casually and looking around 5.3.2000 - After caretaker ████ ████████ jokingly shouts "Good shot!" to SCP-011, the item replies, "Thank you," in a reportedly very human voice, first speech from statue 10.22.2001 - SCP-011 has conversation with caretaker █████████ █████ 2001 - Shooting of birds stops 2.6.2002 - At the imploring of █████████ █████, SCP-011 steps down from its pedestal 2003-2004 - SCP-011 reaches a human level of self-awareness 11.10.2004 - Containment procedures dropped, custody of SCP-011 transferred to █████████ █████ 5.17.2005 - █████████ █████ reports that SCP-011 is romantically attracted to her 8.29.2006 - Most recent psych test reports an IQ of 133

SCP-3049 is a gas-powered convection oven of standard consumer dimensions.

*** Item #: SCP-3049 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-3049 is to remain fixed in place within a standard secure storage room. Its heat control knobs should be removed when not in use. Testing of the object has been halted indefinitely by order of the Ethics Committee. Personnel who have utilized SCP-3049 or partaken in SCP-3049-1 and currently possess knowledge of the object's anomalous properties must receive psychological evaluation and/or amnestics before returning to active duty. Description: SCP-3049 is a gas-powered convection oven of standard consumer dimensions. It possesses a white gloss finish on its frame, a glass oven door, and an aluminum handle. SCP-3049 exhibits an anomalous physical feature in the form of a setting labeled "Apple Pie" beneath its center dial. In its active state, SCP-3049 generates a miniaturized universe inside its oven cavity. This new universe, designated SCP-3049-1, operates on a hyper-accelerated timescale such that an estimated 15 billion years within it equates to 30 minutes outside of it. SCP-3049-1, from its Big Bang to its death, is observable through the oven door. Neither opening the oven door to interrupt this process nor operation of the stove-top seems to be possible during an active cycle. None of the complications associated with matter operating on a sub-Planck length scale have been observed; the laws of physics and universal constants within the miniature universe appear to function normally. The reason for this unexpected continuity of Newtonian physics remains unknown. The perspective observable through SCP-3049's door does not remain constant throughout the lifespan of an SCP-3049-1 universe. SCP-3049 has frequently been observed to adjust its magnification to follow major developments in the formation and expansion of the universe, such as the creation of the first stars, black holes, and galaxies. These perspective shifts have been described as "cinematic" and "like scenes from that Cosmos documentary". SCP-3049-1 instances are also [DATA REDACTED]. + Document #3049-01 - Document #3049-01 Document #3049-01: Discovery log Field operative: Agent Rembrandt Anderson Subject: Mrs. ████ Taylor <Begin Log> Agent Anderson: Afternoon, Mrs. Taylor. Mrs. Taylor: To you too, Mr… Anderson, is it? Mind if I call you Rembrandt? Agent Anderson: Yes, that's correct, and I don't mind at all. May I come in? Mrs. Taylor: Oh, of course, dearie. Let me take you to the kitchen, where the oven is. [Anderson enters the household.] Agent Anderson: Please, lead the way. I understand that you've been having issues with this device not functioning as intended? Mrs. Taylor: Yes, I certainly have! I swear, that hooligan grandson of mine and his delinquent friends must have done this to my oven as some practical joke. I think they installed a screen and a… a secret compartment of some sort. But my eyes aren't so good anymore, so it's rather difficult for me to tell. Agent Anderson: What exactly is it that the oven does which seems unusual? Mrs. Taylor: Well, you see… I always let it preheat before I bake… But recently, after I do that, the door gets stuck and I can't turn it off until it's done playing. [Anderson and the subject arrive in the kitchen.] Agent Anderson: Until what's done playing? Mrs. Taylor: One of those outer space documentaries with all the new-fangled special effects. It plays in this glass door right here… Oh, just let me turn it on and show you, John. Agent Anderson: My name isn't— well, nevermind. Go ahea — Oh. Wow. [SCP-3049 enters its active state.] Mrs. Taylor: You see what I mean, darling? I can only bake without preheating now, with whatever they've done to my oven. Agent Anderson: Yes, I see what you mean. Don't worry, Mrs. Taylor, the company will replace your oven right away. I promise you won't even know it's missing. Mrs. Taylor: Thank you, Kevin. Agent Anderson: I'm just doing my job. Now, if you wouldn't mind, could you step out of the shot so I can take some pictures of the malfunctioning device? For insurance purposes, you understand. Mrs. Taylor: Oh, no problem at all. Excuse me… [The subject exits the kitchen and moves toward the dining room. Anderson uses his phone to take several photos of SCP-3049 in its active state. The subject returns while carrying pastry.] Mrs. Taylor: Would you like some apple pie, darling? Agent Anderson: Oh no, I couldn't. Mrs. Taylor: Please have some, Jacob dear. I can be rather absent minded while baking. I swear I have twice the amount that I know what to do with. [Anderson takes a slice of apple pie.] Agent Anderson: Thank you, ma'am… Mm, this is some good pie! Any chance I could get a little bit to go? I bet the installation guys'll clean you all outta this product when they get here. You're a great baker. Mrs. Taylor: Thank you! You're such a sweetheart, Brian. Let me get you the rest of the dish — you can keep the whole thing. I don't usually like to bake in glass pans, and I doubt whoever gave me this one would mind a bit of re-gifting. <End Log> Closing Statement: SCP-3049 was recovered from Mrs. Taylor's suburban home without incident. The subject's oven was replaced with a non-anomalous version of identical make. Low-grade amnestics were successfully administered. - Document #3049-01 + Level 3 clearance required - Document #3049-02 Document #3049-02: Excerpt from The Life Cycle of SCP-3049-1 Universes, by Dr. Riley Cadence. At approximately 20 minutes (10 billion years) into the life cycle of SCP-3049-1, the perspective displayed by SCP-3049 diverges from previously observed patterns, the frame of reference becoming scaled to a single star late in its formation process. The type of star on which the object becomes fixated varies, but it has been noted in the majority of cases to be an astronomical body similar in size, temperature, and composition to the sun. During and after the star's formation, SCP-3049 gradually transitions its display's focus to the development of an Earth-like planet occupying the circumstellar habitable zone. At some point after the planet has cooled enough for liquid water to cover portions of its surface, SCP-3049's perspective shifts to follow the development of carbon-based life. Lifeforms within SCP-3049-1 evolve to live on land in 60% of observed cases. Intelligent life arises on the habitable planet and subsequently becomes the dominant species. After these sentient beings begin to construct complex civilizations, the timescale of the universe suddenly decelerates so that an estimated 1,000 years within SCP-3049-1 equates to 1 minute outside. The sentient lifeforms become technologically advanced and, in 70% of observed cases, space-faring. It is usually at this point that the dominant civilization on the planet creates self-replicating molecular nanotechnology with reality-bending properties, an invention henceforth designated SCP-3049-2. SCP-3049-2 immediately engages in ecophagy — the consumption of its environment — resulting in a "Grey Goo" scenario which terminates its planet, solar system, and galaxy of origin. The nanotechnology rapidly propagates throughout the remainder of the universe while absorbing all matter into itself. This process culminates in a YK-class end-of-reality event in which the entirety of the SCP-3049-1 universe is converted into an apple pie nested inside a glass baking dish. A fresh SCP-3049-1 instance . . . . . . . . . . . . . - Document #3049-02 Addendum: Shortly after the submission of her report, Dr. Cadence requested psychological evaluation and a project transfer.

SCP-4276 is a tribe of insects descending from the family of Chrysididae1, more commonly known as cuckoo wasps.

*** Item #: SCP-4276 A non-anomalous instance of Chrysidinae. Photographed and tested for abnormalities by Dr. ████. Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: All instances of SCP-4276 are to be held collectively within a glass observation chamber, and smoke exhalers are to be embedded within each corner, allowing quick neutralization and dispersion of the colony. Instances are to be fed a 250g mix consisting of 70% fruit and 30% dead insects, primarily small spiders, and ants, 4 times a week. No species larger than a common mouse are to be fed to SCP-4276. SCP-4276 is to be observed twice a month for any signs of colony growth, in which case, mandatory culling is to take place through smoking of all instances containment chamber and extracting excess occurrences. Only 20 instances of SCP-4276 are to remain alive at one time. Any testing of SCP-4276 must be performed by level-3 personnel or higher, moreover, it must first be approved by level-4-4276 personnel assigned to instance containment. Any staff who interact with SCP-4276 must allow themselves to be subject to an MRI scan, medicinal treatment, and pyrethroid cleanse at any moment. Any and all recreational audio-visual appliances are to remain outside of SCP-4276's containment. In case of a containment breach, all instances are to be terminated and the site is to be placed into lockdown. It is unknown if the entirety of SCP-4276 has been contained. Description: SCP-4276 is a tribe of insects descending from the family of Chrysididae1, more commonly known as cuckoo wasps. SCP-4276 is nearly physically indistinguishable with its non-anomalous counterparts,2 save for the possession of a greater diversity for vibrancy amongst its families, allowing varied shades of green, blue, pink, red, yellow, magenta. Certain cases of SCP-4276 experience a significantly longer period of growth than non-anomalous species, ranging from 1.2 cm (0.5 inches) to upwards of 8.1cm (3.2 inches). SCP-4276 possesses an ovipositor to assist in egg insemination, although replacing the functionality of a stinger. Male instances appear to lack both. SCP-4276 is for the most part identical in behavior to their non-anomalous counterparts, save for an apparent quirk of newborn wasps to create 'colonies' near hatching points. Newborn SCP-4276 instances also appear to mature especially quickly, as most natural births take place after about 3 days, compared to a full week. SCP-4276 does not appear to prefer eggs to host their larvae in3, rather introducing its larvae to both living and freshly killed animals. SCP-4276 has been discovered having infected: (4) White-Tailed Deer. (2) Desert Cottontail. (1) Red Fox, observed consuming a Cottontail. (1) Black Bear. (1) German Shepard. (4) Human males. Discovery: SCP-4276 was first discovered 8km east of Oak Creek, Colorado after 4 individuals (henceforth designated POI-4276-1 through 4) were reported missing. One such individual was a Jebidiah Carswell4, an avid hunter, community spokesman, and known associate of The Board of the Highest Huntsman. Foundation agents found that Mr. Carswell had recently purchased a hunting cottage near Stagecoach State Park, and had emailed a select few of his colleagues to meet him that weekend. Foundation agents were successful in obtaining Mr. Carswell's property records and quarantined the cottage, which had become infested with SCP-4276. Mr. Carswell had allegedly scheduled a hunting trip for his colleagues and, after a failed night of searching, decided to celebrate instead. MTF Lambda-12 was dispatched. +Open Discovery Log-4276 -Close Discovery Log-4276 Exploration Video Log Transcript Date: 1999/03/13 — 06:30 am Exploration Team: MTF Lambda-12 ("Pest Control") Team Lead: Lambda-1 ('Lanie') Team Members: Lambda-2('Colin'), Lambda-3 ('Jameson'), Lambda-4 ('Alan') Note: MTF Lambda-12 agents are equipped with modified smoke blowers strapped to their backs as well as a sidearm. [BEGIN LOG] 00:00—(Personal body cams are switched to active, revealing agents stacked up on the cottage door.) 00:10—(Lambda-4 casts a smoke grenade into the entryway as agents disperse within the room.) 00:20—(Smoke clears and POI-4276-2 is visible laying adjacent to the door face down.) Lambda-1: Search the building. Remember protocol. 00:35—(Lambda-1 investigates POI-4276-2. Hoisting up the body reveals what appears to be numerous wounds in his back, resembling holes.) 00:40—(Lambda-3 likewise discovers POI-4276-3 and a German Shepherd in the kitchen area. POI- 4276-3's chest is visible having been opened outwards from the sternum. The canine5 appears relatively intact save for a cavity in its head.) Lambda-3: dog and a POI, still no sign of an anomaly. Lambda-1: Roger, continue search. Lambda-2, copy? 01:00—(At the same time as Lambda-1's transmission, Lambda-2 opens the bathroom door. POI-4276-4 is discovered stooped inside of the bathtub, his innards having been spilt into the tub due to an immense opening in their abdomen. A large number of SCP-4276 are present and begin droning loudly.) Lambda-2: —Oh fuck. Bathroom! 1:05—(Lambda-2 activates his smoke blower as Lambda-4 releases a smoke grenade through the bathroom door, he then promptly slams it shut. Smoke is seen pouring out beneath the doorframe.) Lambda-4: You're welcome. Lambda-2: Fuck off. Have you found POI-1? 1:25—(Lambda-4 nods and gestures towards the far eastern wall, where a large stereo has been overturned. Large amounts of alcohol are seen having been placed or knocked over around the system.) Lambda-1: Anyone got eyes on the final POI? Lambda-4: Yes sir, eastern wall. Lambda-2: I don't see him. Lambda-4: Look closer. 1:40—(Upon closer inspection POI-4276-1 is located, having been wedged between the wall and a loudspeaker, causing it to fall forward and become inoperable. POI-4276-1's head has been split open, and a single adult instance of SCP-4276 is acknowledged burrowing into his brain.) Lambda-2: Bag up the bodies and let's get the hell out of here. Jameson, help me deal with the bathroom. Lambda-3: Roger that. [END LOG] Addendum: Following a successful operation, MTF Lambda-12 was able to contain a number of living specimens of SCP-4276. 127 active instances have been contained. SCP-4276 does not hatch easily in conventional conditions, as controlled trials using rats revealed only a ~20%6 successful birthing rate. Use of carcasses during trials reduced this number to ~16%. It is currently unknown how to keep the size of SCP-4276 in containment at a stable number, as breeding seems unreliable at best. Following recent discoveries, it has been noted that auditory stimuli meeting certain qualifications (such as bass distortion and a 90db minimal requirement) appears to cause accelerated hatching7 within subjects. Test trials commenced afterward included the presence of a speaker blaring audio. Birthing rates increased throughout said tests to ~92%. SCP-4276 can now reliably be replenished for testing. + Open Testing Log-4276 - Close Testing Log-4276 Preword: All subjects are to be placed into a glass containment chamber 1m by 1m, along with select instances of SCP-4276. These tests are to determine how exactly SCP-4276 is able to accelerate its incubation process. Subject: (3) White rats. (1) SCP-4276 Instance. Materials: N.A. Results: Subjects are released into containment chamber and are immediately attacked by SCP-4276. SCP-4276 is successful in injecting one subject before being ripped in half by the pack. The injected subject was immediately removed from containment and a foreign body surgery was performed, which resulted in several surviving larvae being removed. Autopsy reveals the presence of numerous deceased larvae. No further damage is reported. Subject: (1) White rat. (2) SCP-4276 Instances. Materials: N.A. Results: Subject is released into containment chamber and immediately attacked by SCP-4276. Both instances are successful in injecting the subject, but instead of fleeing begin to grip to its backside. Eventually, one instance is successful in piercing the subject's skin and burrows itself within the subject's lower back. Subject collapses and Genesis Event results in (5) instances of SCP-4276. Autopsy reveals the presence of fewer larvae than previous tests, but not significantly. Subject: (1) Black-footed ferret. (4) SCP-4276 Instances. Materials: (1) Portable Bluetooth speaker. Results: Bluetooth speaker is amplified upwards to 95db and placed inside the chamber, and the subject is released into containment. Two wasps are successfully able to inject the subject before it completely enters the chamber. (1) wasp, the only male of the group, is unable to inject or bite the ferret, instead deciding to enter the ferret's mouth. The male instance is successful and exits seconds later through the subject's skull. 30 minutes after initial contact Genesis Event begins and (25) instances of SCP-4276 emerge. Autopsy reveals significantly less deceased larvae than previous tests. Subject: (1) Desert cottontail. (2) SCP-4276 Instances. Materials: (1) Portable Bluetooth speaker. See Results Log. Results: Bluetooth speaker is amplified upwards to 100db and placed directly inside the chamber, the subject is released shortly afterward. Both instances of SCP-4276 are successful in injecting the subject just as it bashes the speaker, rendering it inoperable. The subject was later successful in terminating both occurrences of SCP-4276. Due to recent complications regarding facility power, Site-██ suffered a non-uniform breaker trip. During this time, a fluorescent light illuminating the test chamber began flickering violently, and the subject became erratic. After 10 minutes of violent thrashing, subject's upper back split open and (42) instances of SCP-4276 emerged. Subject: (1) Human male: D-9974. (6) SCP-4276 Instances. Materials: (1) Portable Bluetooth speaker. (1) LED strobe light. Results: [DATA EXPUNGED BY ORDER OF ETHICS COMMITTEE] Visual stimuli also appear to have an effect on SCP-4276 events, as irregular or extreme illumination shows to accelerate gestation within host subjects. The exact reasoning behind these reactions is unknown, but it should be noted the incredible increase in growth that colonies experience upon encountering these circumstances. It should also be noted that containment procedures have been altered slightly in regards to the aforementioned information: All shrubland within 8km of Discovery Site-4276 is to be tested for signs of SCP-4276 and cleansed of insect life. + WARNING: CLASS-4 IDENTIFICATION REQUIRED  - IDENTIFIED. WELCOME: HEAD RESEARCHER CALLOWAY Incident Log-4276-1: On the date of 1999/06/22 Foundation observationalists overlooking the town of Oak Creek in Routt County, Colorado noted the presence of numerous correlated police reports. Several such reports remarked on complaints of a "loud buzzing noise" resonating from the local area. Local police were delayed by agents while surveyors attempted to triangulate the location in question. GPS tracking eventually led Foundation agents to Soroco High School, where the yearly prom night was being held. MTF Lambda-12 was dispatched. Date: 1999/06/23 — 12:00 am Exploration Team: MTF Lambda-12 ("Pest Control") Team Lead: Lambda-1 ('Lanie') Team Members: Lambda-2 ('Colin'), Lambda-3 ('Jameson'), Lambda-4 ('Alan') Note: MTF Lambda-12 agents have been equipped with modified flamethrowers mounted upon their rifles. Researcher Calloway has also been dispatched to relay orders directly from Ethics Committee personnel. [BEGIN LOG] 00:00—(Body cams are switched to active, revealing MTF Lambda-12 agents following Foundation personnel as they secure the perimeter. Faint techno music is heard in the background.) 00:45—(MTF Lambda-12 is visible stacking up against the front door. Lambda-4 quickly releases a smoke grenade as the team enters.) Lambda-1: Lobby clear, taking point. Lambda-3: Can anyone else hear that buzzing? Lambda-2: Picking it up too, could have sworn I heard mu— 01:00:—(Buzzing within the school appears to increase in intensity, nearly drowning out the loud thudding resonating from the east of Lambda-1.) Lambda-1: Standby. (Lambda-1 raises her hand to her radio.) Doctor Calloway, this looks like the gymnasium. Doctor Calloway: Copy, proceed as instructed. 01:10—(A thump is heard once again from the gymnasium door, followed by nearly ten seconds of erratic banging. Eventually, the noises seize, and Lambda-12 agents approach the door.) Lambda-1: Prepare for breach. 01:30—(Lambda-4 tosses two more smoke grenades before agents approach the room. access reveals several corpses scattered across the floor of the gymnasium. Foundation transmitters become deafening loud as the team moves towards the center of the room. swarms of SCP-4276 are seen fluttering across the room in large gatherings. The body of a young girl, swollen and covered in red marks, lays near the entrance.) Lambda-1: Keep your masks on and assess the damage. We'll torch this place after we identify where the hive is. Lambda-4: Colin, make sure that door's shut and help me count the bodies. Lambda-2: Sure thing, but what if there are survivors? Lambda-1: Unlikely. Prep for extermination. Lambda-2: … and the kids? Lambda-3: You mean the ones on the dance floor? Lambda-4: What about it? hey, Colin!. 02:00—(Lambda-2 approaches the body of a young boy whose body had become heavily bloated, laying skywards beneath the disco ball. A multitude of limbs are seen crumpled into a near singular mass, and SCP-4276 individuals are seen crawling between several orifices. Suddenly, the abdomen of the young boy bursts and a cloud of instances of SCP-4276 emerge.) Lambda-1: Jesus fuck! Open fire! 02:05—(Lambda-12 agents activate their flamethrowers and begin neutralizing targets throughout the gym, as large quantities of SCP-4276 are seen fluttering towards the team. Nearly all traces of music is drowned out by buzzing before the feed cuts.) 02:50—(Body cam feed returns to an active state, revealing the majority of the gymnasium to be choked in embers. Several seconds pass before visual confirmation is made of MTF Lambda-12.) Lambda-3: Son of a bitch! everyone, report? Lambda-1: (Coughs violently.) I'm good… where's Colin? Lambda-4: Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck. 03:05—(Lambda-4 approaches the hive, noticing Lambda-2 unresponsive and overturned. Lambda-4 quickly assesses Lambda-2 for wounds, revealing a number of insertions within his throat.) Lambda-1: Keep searching, we still have to clear the building. 03:10-06:50—(Lambda-4 remains motionless for 20 seconds, before standing upright. Lambda-12 proceeds to search the majority of the building where little of interest is noted, save for a supply closet on the second floor. Lambda-3 approaches the door with caution.) POI-4276-5: Somebody! Help us, please!. Oh my God—you're okay Jackie, hold on. 06:55—(Camera footage picks up the image of a middle-aged man, dark in complexion, huddled over a young girl. 8 other students are seen cowering nearby.) Lambda-3: Got a live one! hey, is everyone holding up alright? POI-4276-5: Holy shit, aren't we lucky to see some police? Finally. Listen, we need your help man, you gotta get us outta here. Lambda-2: I need to know what happened here first, the whole building is on lockdown. POI-4276-5: lockdown? I don't know! The graduation ceremony is next week so we scheduled the prom for tonight, just like every other year. Prom started at 10:00 pm, music started at 11:00 pm, everything else went just as it was supposed to. It wasn't supposed to end like this! I had gone to get a coffee before the slow dance and… (The man groans loudly before continuing.) When I came back I opened the door… and then I saw Daniel. He had gone out to get some fresh air, but when he came back he kept scratching his arm really bad, thought it was just an allergic reaction. He was the valedictorian, y' know, I expected the best from that kid. But, I see him on the dance floor and he just sorta doubles over and pukes all over his date's shoes! I go to get a mop and when I get back…There were these bees. No, wasps. Oh, I don't fucking know! but they were there! I watched them just, crawl all out of his mouth, and they were so bright, I don't know where they went. Nobody but his date noticed, and she was trying so hard to scream over the music, but before you knew it they just scattered. I tried my best to stop the music but in no time they had gotten all over the place, and everyone just fucking danced! Then the actual screaming started. Lambda-3: What about the kid in the corner? Is she alright? POI-4276-5: She got attacked by one of those damn things. They started biting everyone, and I watched one crawl right in her mouth. Then she just started seizing. I think one of them got me too, i'm itching all over the place. She's gonna be alright, right? Lambda-3: Orders are orders, I'm sorry. 07:35—(Lambda-2 is seen unholstering and chambering his rifle. POI-4276-5 appears distressed before [DATA EXPUNGED].) [END LOG] Addendum: MTF Lambda-12 was deemed successful in their mission of eradicating the site of all traces of SCP-4276 whilst minimizing loss of innocent life. Despite best attempts, however, a local investigation revealed the presence of SCP-4276 in nearby homes. Following approval from the Ethics Committee, Class-C amnestics were administered to surviving inhabitants of Oak Creek and cover story 29 'Localized Blaze' was put into effect. The population of Oak Creek, Colorado prior to Incident-4276-1 was estimated to be about 1,020. Footnotes 1. More specifically the tribe Chrysidini. 2. including kleptoparasitic breeding habits and structural coloration. 3. As opposed to their non-anomalous counterparts, which are notorious for infesting spider dens. 4. POI-4276-1. 5. Recovery of a collar proposed the dog's name as 'Ringo'. Evidence supports relationship as POI-4276-1's companion. 6. Subjects were placed into a glass container along with a single instance of SCP-4276, then left within the chamber for 5 days. 7. Henceforth titled a 'Genesis Event'.

SCP-1484 is a leather-bound journal measuring 30.

*** Item #: SCP-1484 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-1484 is to be kept in Locker 58-C at Storage Site-23. Level 2 staff and above may access SCP-1484 for approved research at the discretion of the Deputy Director of Research. All experimentation must be recorded in Research Log-1484. Description: SCP-1484 is a leather-bound journal measuring 30.2 cm in length, 23.1 cm in width, and 4.7 cm thick. SCP-1484 contains 326 blank pages. However, pages 125-142 of SCP-1484 feature a series of roughly 5cm2 areas or "panels" (approximately 20 per page) which, when in contact with human skin, cause the "reader" to experience a range of different tactile sensations throughout their body. Each individual panel corresponds to a different, usually complex set of tactile stimuli. The sensation persists for approximately ten seconds after the subject touches SCP-1484. Research has determined that the paper in SCP-1484 contains no known chemical adulterations or other unusual properties, and is identical in every way to commercially available paper from the same time period estimated to be that of SCP-1484's manufacture. How SCP-1484 is able to manifest the generation of tactile sensation in subjects is currently unknown. SCP-1484 was recovered from the estate of Mr. ██████████ ██████████████ in 19██, as part of Protocol ████-A5, related to the securing of personal effects of certain individuals identified by the Federal Bureau of Investigations' ViCAP program as "persons of interest" in unexplained disappearances. According to public records, Mr. ██████████████ died of natural causes. Research Log-1484-4: Catalogue of Notable Effects Page 125: Panel 13 - Subject experiences feeling as though present in an environment of approximately 22-24°C, regardless of temperature in test chamber. Subject will also experience the sensation of light breezes estimated at 3-5 km/h from a direction always to the subject's left. Page 125: Panel 18 - Induces a rhythmic swaying sensation, described by one D-Class test subject as feeling like a "playground swing". Page 127: Panel 3 - Causes a sense of tightness in the quadriceps muscles and mild shortness of breath, consistent with light exercise. Page 128: Panel 5 - Mild displacement felt in the stomach region such as that associated with rapid downward movement along an incline. Page 130: Panel 11 - Sensation of a hand firmly grasping the subject's right bicep. Note that test subjects have described the hand as being particularly large, and encompassing most of the upper arm in its grip, regardless of subject's physical dimensions. Page 132: Panel 8 - Subject experiences severe cramps in the quadriceps and calf muscles and pronounced shortness of breath. Subject also experiences acute pain associated with the larynx and vocal cords. Page 132: Panel 20 - Pressing sensation on subject's back, buttocks, and legs, while the neck and head crane to the left. Subjects report no sensation of breathing, though no feelings of asphyxia or associated pain in the chest or lungs. Page 133: Panel 17 - Two hands grasp the subject violently by both arms. Page 133: Panel 19 - A hand grasps the subject by the throat while a piece of indeterminate fabric is placed forcefully against the subject's mouth and nose. 59% of test subjects have lost consciousness by touching this panel, while the remainder report extreme fatigue or sleepiness. Page 137: Panel 1 - The subject experiences the sensation of their wrists and ankles being fastened together, along with a sense of locomotion, corresponding to travel at no less than 50 km/h. Page 139: Panel 9 - Subject experiences feeling of being secured to whatever chair they are sitting in at the time. In previous observations, subjects have been documented to stand up, yet continue reporting the feeling of immobility. [DATA EXPUNGED] Page 142: Panel 3 - Subject continues to experience high levels of pain related to extensive physical trauma seemingly incurred in Pages 140-141. Subject becomes effectively blind for the duration of Panel 3's effects. Page 142: Panel 8 - Subject immediately experiences sensation of considerable blunt force trauma to the left temple. Page 142: Panel 20 - Complete lack of perception of outside environment strikes subject for duration of Panel 20's effects. Subjects later describe only a feeling of numbness. Research Log-1484-12: On 12/11/20██, Researcher ████████████ noted anomalous phenomena associated with Pages 321-326 of SCP-1484. All tests conducted on these pages prior to this date demonstrated no notable properties. Pages 321 to 326 exhibit similar traits to Pages 125-142, in that contact with the pages produces tactile sensations independent of the subject's current environment. However, rather than a series of panels on each page provoking different sensations, each page contains only a single effect. These effects are of a much lower intensity than those manifested in Pages 125-142, and consist of merely slight changes in perception of temperature or mild sensations of movement. The exception is Page 326, which provokes a clear sensation of moist earth all over the subject's body, coupled with the feeling of suffocation during the the entirety of its five-second period of effect. All subsequent tests have not revealed any changes to Pages 321-326 or any other portion of SCP-1484 since the above date. Addendum 1484-1: Risk and Strategic Value Assessment 1484-1 performed by Senior Researcher ██████████ following Incident 1484-3. In accordance with report recommendations, experiments involving Pages 140-141 are suspended indefinitely, given the relatively low value of knowledge thus far obtained versus documented psychological trauma and resulting episodes of violence by test subjects against staff. Senior Researcher's Note: We've already determined what happens and turned over the data to Site-23's investigations unit. There is absolutely no reason to keep expending resources doing what amounts to re-watching a particularly disturbing snuff film. Addendum 1484-2: Following examination of the ████████ County archives and local law enforcement records, no known criminal act within 100 kilometers of ██████████ ██████████████'s documented place of residence corresponds with the events depicted in SCP-1484. This includes the abduction and subsequent homicide of Ms. ████████ ███████, the case which first brought Mr. ██████████████ to the attention of federal authorities. Researchers' hypothesis that SCP-1484 is somehow a record of a past event therefore remains unproven. Investigations into past residences and activities of Mr. ██████████████, as well as the nature and extent of his connections to SCP-1484, are ongoing.

SCP-3108 is a heavily modified Nerf brand dart gun which demonstrates anomalous transformative properties when paired with SCP-3108-1, a foam dart discovered loaded within SCP-3108 at the time of recovery.

*** Item #: SCP-3108 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-3108 is to be contained in a standard anomalous object containment vault in Site-64, and is not to be removed except for testing purposes. Proposed tests must be approved in advance by both Dr. Johnson and Dr. Dietz. SCP-3108-1 is not to be loaded into SCP-3108 except during testing, and is to be stored in a separate containment unit. When conducting tests, SCP-3108 is to be handled by Site-64 security staff only. One officer is to hold and fire the object, while a second is to observe the proceedings to minimize risk of accident or foul play. Researchers and D-class are forbidden from firing the object due to safety and security concerns respectively. Due to the accuracy of SCP-3108 being in line with similar products, a maximum one (1) meter distance is to be maintained from the intended target to prevent accidents. Under no circumstance is SCP-3108 to be used in cross-testing with other SCP objects. Following Ethics committee ruling on 04/05/20██, testing on humanoids has been forbidden. Description: SCP-3108 is a heavily modified Nerf brand dart gun which demonstrates anomalous transformative properties when paired with SCP-3108-1, a foam dart discovered loaded within SCP-3108 at the time of recovery. SCP-3108 does not demonstrate these properties when firing Nerf darts other than SCP-3108-1, nor does SCP-3108-1 demonstrate these properties when fired from a different Nerf dart gun. The phrase "OP PLS NERF" is inscribed on the exterior of SCP-3108-1 in red ink. When SCP-3108 fires SCP-3108-1 into a target, said target will instantaneously be altered in such a way that the result is perceived as "worse" or "inferior" by the individual wielding the object. This transformation can range from minor alterations to complete molecular reconstruction. The law of conservation of mass does not affect transformations caused by SCP-3108, and noticeable increases or decreases in mass have occurred often in testing. The resulting objects or organisms do not show any evidence of anomalous traits. Transformations do not represent any objective value scale, but rather stem solely from the opinions of the current holder. The outer shell of SCP-3108 is composed of steel, with bronze inlays used as decoration. While not impervious to physical damage, disassembly of SCP-3108 has proven impossible due to its anomalous nature. All tools attempting to deconstruct the object will be transformed into broken or fake equivalents, precluding examination of the object's interior.1 This seeming behavior of self preservation is the only time SCP-3108 has altered objects beyond those hit by SCP-3108-1. Recovery: SCP-3108’s anomalous properties were discovered during a birthday party for 10 year old Jacob Pierce in ██████, Oregon. It is presumed SCP-3108 was fired at a concrete wall, resulting in the concrete being replaced by loosely stacked stones. The wall promptly collapsed, causing minor injuries to 3 civilians. Foundation involvement came after the family sued the contractor of their home for the incident. The anomalous effect that caused the transformation was eventually traced to the gun following examination of the incident's location. During post incident investigation, Jacob's brother 19 year old Nathan Pierce was identified as a member of the GOI Gamers Against Weed. Pierce had previously been known to the Foundation under his online alias "Kektagon," and had been designated POI-6897 due to his creation of SCP-████ and SCP-████. A subsequent attempt to detain the target failed, as POI-6897 had fled the area two days prior to identification as Nathan Pierce. Partial Test Log: Target: One dart board made of sisal fibres. Result: Dart board composition was changed to cork. In addition, various small holes and what appears to be a beer stain appeared on the board. Target: An eight by eleven sheet of printer paper. Result: Paper changed composition to single ply toilet paper. Target: One spare coffee mug from the Site 19 Cafeteria. Result: Coffee mug was replaced by a tea cup composed of ceramic identical to the mug's. Target: One United States dollar. Result: One United States quarter. Notes: Subsequent tests on dollar bills resulted in various outcomes, including dimes, nickels, pennies, foreign currencies, and fake bills from the board game Monopoly. There doesn't seem to be an exact formula for these changes.- Dr. Dietz Target: One can of Coca Cola. Result: One can of Pepsi Cola. Notes: Mike, the security officer observing the test, expressed dismay at seeing this result. We had him fire the dart at the Pepsi can and it changed right back into Coke.- Dr Dietz Target: One Standard D-class uniform. Result: Composition of uniform was changed entirely to cotton, and a tag reading "Made in China" was added at the neck. Notes: While that was hilarious, I think this test is onto something. Does the gun have a sense of humor?-Dr. Johnson Target: One VHS tape containing the 1971 film Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. Result: One DVD of the film's 2005 remake Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Target: One male Rattus norvegicus specimen. Result: One male specimen of Iridomyrmex purpureus. Notes: Interesting logic on this one. What is the causal link between rats and ants?- Dr Dietz Target: One female Golden Retriever. Result: One female American Shorthair with yellow hair. Specimen was unusually large (15.4 kilograms2) and continued to display behavior consistent with a Golden Retriever rather than a feline. Target: D-4281, 28 year old Caucasian male. Result: D-4281 transformed into a living specimen of Homo neanderthalensis. Preface: To test the limits of the danger SCP-3108 could pose to a human being, security officer Gardiner was instructed to reload and fire the gun repeatedly until ordered to cease. Target: D-3578, 24 year old Hispanic male. Result: Initially displaying similar results to D-4281, D-3578 proceeded to transform into a variety of different species including what appeared to be an Australopithecus, an unidentified member of the gibbon family, and a specimen of Bradypus pygmaeus.3 On nine occasions, the transformation did not result in a change of species but instead resulted in visible evidence of maiming, disease, or disability. Following 46 successive uses, testing was ceased as D-3578 had been reduced to a specimen of Lumbricus terrestris too small to be accurately hit by SCP-3108-1. Notes: Due to concerns from the Ethics Committee as well as the possibility of accidental creation of a Homo ignotus specimen, testing of SCP-3108 on humanoids is suspended effective immediately pending a hearing.- Dr Dietz Addendum: On 07/19/20██, Foundation personnel apprehended POI-6897 at an Internet cafe in Los Angeles, California. POI-6897 was then escorted to Site-64 for interrogation regarding his creations. Interrogation regarding SCP-3108 can be found below. + Show Interview - Hide Interview Interviewed: POI-6897, Nathan Pierce. Subject displays low level reality altering capabilities common among anartists and GAW members. Interviewer: Dr. Leo Dietz <Begin Log> Dr. Dietz: Mr. Pierce, today I'm going to be asking you some questions about another of your… creations. Specifically, the gun. POI-6897: Get fucked. Dr. Dietz: Now now, that isn't very helpful. Perhaps I should have Agent Green talk to you again instead? POI-6897: That, um, that isn't necessary. I'm sure he's a busy guy, we wouldn't want to bother him, lol. Dr. Dietz: Pierce, did you really just say the letters lol out loud? POI-6897: Ugh. I'm used to talking on the internet, sue me. And it's Kektagon to you. So, what do you fascist cucks want to know? Dr. Dietz: I am not going to call you by your juvenile screen name. More importantly, why did you create the gun? POI-6897: Oh the Nerfing gun. Classic. Yeah, I thought it would be funny. Dr. Dietz: …That's all? POI-6897: Look, what to do you want me to say? That it's a symbol of guns making the world worse or something? Not everything has some grand purpose man. It's just something I thought of while smoking. I mean come on, a Nerf gun that makes things shitty. It's hilarious! I didn't even think of the obvious pun until later. Eventually I got bored of it and gave it to my bro as a birthday gift. Probably should have warned him to be more careful, but live and learn am I right? Dr. Dietz: You honestly expect me to believe that? Despite your group's supposed pacifism, the anomalies you all have produced can be lethal. This little joke of yours has changed steel into balsa wood and people into invertebrates. You clearly intended this as a weapon. POI-6897: …You, you used it on people? Dr. Dietz: Our testing history is not relevant to- POI-6897: It… It was supposed to be a joke. It was funny. I changed Mass Effect 2 into Mass Effect 3, my neighbor's SUV into a Smart Car, I didn't use it on people! You bastards, why the hell would you do that? I'm not a murderer damn it! Why, why would you turn a joke into a torture device? Just… just get out of my cell. I'm done talking. <End Log> Footnotes 1. An attempt to disassemble SCP-3108 using only bare hands resulted in the replacement of Security Officer Silva's hands with a pair of empty rubber gloves. 2. Standard weight ranges from 5-7 kilograms. 3. More Commonly known as the Pigmy Three Toed Sloth.

SCP-1140 is a chest of 7 drawers painted with clear gloss varnish over oak.

*** Item #: SCP-1140 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-1140 may be kept in any secure storage area of sufficient size (It is currently in room R.4.13). For accurate and rigorous testing, however, it is required that the object is kept in a room with at least 2 metres of clearance in each direction for movement of testing equipment, and is supported at least 30cm off the ground by 4 clear Perspex rods, one mounted at each corner of the base. The base is to be mounted upon a weighing apparatus which is connected to an alarm; the alarm is to sound if the weight of the object changes by more than 0.4%.1 Endoscopy equipment is to be stored in the storage area’s equipment locker at all times when not in use. Description: SCP-1140 is a chest of 7 drawers painted with clear gloss varnish over oak. The chest is 148cm in width, 49cm in depth and 91cm in height. The drawers' dimensions are (top to bottom): Three drawers 46cm wide, 21cm tall and 46cm deep Two drawers 70cm wide, 21cm tall and 46cm deep Two drawers 70cm wide, 31cm tall and 46cm deep The anomalous behaviour is observed when the central drawer in the top row of the chest is opened at least 2cm, whereby under certain circumstances vocalisation can be detected from within the chest. This vocalisation has been designated SCP-1140-1. Testing has shown that the circumstances include the presence of a single prepubescent child, the presence of a single post-pubescent who has significant mental retardation2, or any adult who has assisted with [REDACTED].3 Dismantling the chest has revealed there to be nothing within the cavity behind the drawers capable of producing vocalisation; presence of speakers or any other electromagnetic equipment capable of playback has been ruled out by use of metal-detection apparatus. As the anomalous vocalisation only occurs when a single individual is present, remote-control equipment must be used during testing. Presence of the equipment seems to have no effect on testing. Although SCP-1140-1 is for all experimental considerations a disembodied voice, any attempts to reach towards the rear of the drawer during such time as the voice can be heard results in injury. This appears to only occur to live human beings, and does not occur when SCP-1140-1 is inactive. The wounds are consistent with having been caused by a large claw, and are most similar in pathology to wounds caused by a large ratite (ostrich, emu, or cassowary). Recovery Log: The item was recovered from the dining area of a house in ███████, ██. The house was otherwise unremarkable; after application of Class A amnestics and neurolinguistic programming by a field agent, the family remain in-situ, with the chest having been replaced by a non-anomalous replica. SCP-1140 came to the attention of a researcher during periodic checking of psychiatric reports,4 and a field agent was sent out to interview both the report's subject and his family. Interviews revealed that the youngest member of the household had been found on several occasions sitting on the floor near to SCP-1140 and having conversations with what the family believed to be an 'imaginary friend'. The amount of time that the child spent doing this, in addition to his refusing to move for hours, resulted in him being reviewed by a child psychiatrist. Recovery Interview Log Close Interview Log Excerpt (0:11:12 to 0:13:42) from Recovery Interview 1140-A5 (███ █████, 6yo male): Agent █████: When did you first start hearing the voice? ███ █████: I heard him talking to me when I walked past him once. Agent █████: Can you remember how old you were? ███ █████: Oh, it was after my birthday party. I was 6 at my party. Agent █████: Less than eight months, then. What did the voice say? ███ █████: It’s not a voice. It’s Mr Gurgles. Agent █████: Is that what he says his name is? ███ █████: No, I made it up. He doesn’t tell me his name. Agent █████: What does he sound like? ███ █████: He sounds like he’s on the news (Giggles). Agent █████: On the news? ███ █████: Yes, he sounds all posh, like Prince Charles. Agent █████: And what does he say to you? ███ █████: We just talk. About me, about (pauses) school. Agent █████: Does he talk about himself at all? ███ █████: No, I asked him why he was in the drawer once, and he said he wasn’t in the drawer. I asked him where he was then, and he said that he was only a reppentation(sic) in this mentional.(sic). (It can be reasonably assumed that this was 'a representation in this dimension.') Agent █████: Did he say anything else about himself? ███ █████: I asked him what his house was like, and he said he didn’t want to tell me. He got a bit angry and so I didn’t ask him again. Agent █████: What did he say when he was angry? ███ █████: I couldn’t tell, his voice went all crackly. It was scary, I didn’t like it. End of Excerpt. Interview 1140-C1 Hide Interview 1140-C1 Excerpt from Test Interview 1140-C1 (D-93223, 19yo Female, Leucotomy performed at [DATA EXPUNGED].): D-93223: Hello! Hello! (Pushes drawer shut. A researcher enters the room and re-opens it). SCP-1140-1: He’s gone now. D-93223: Who has gone? The man? SCP-1140-1: Yes. The man has gone. We can talk. You can help me. D-93223: What can I do? I can talk to you. Are you from England? SCP-1140-1: I'm from… From England, yes. D-93223: I want to go to England. SCP-1140-1: I need you to find me some (silence for 8 seconds) things. Can you do that? D-93223: Oh, I can't find things. They say at the hospital that I'm always losing things. Have you asked your mom? (The following was inaudible during the recordings and has been re-constructed using forensic audio analysis:) SCP-1140-1: How did it feel? Did it make a noise when they tore it out? Did you [INAUDIBLE] when it came away? I bet you [INAUDIBLE] all the way through it, didn’t you? (SCP-1140-1 laughs) Filthy bitch. You haven’t even [INAUDIBLE] pussy before you came in. You shouldn’t have told them why. You never should have told [INAUDIBLE] why you didn’t help her. D-93223: I don’t like you! You tell lies! I hate you! (shouts at the door) LET ME OUT! MR GURGLES IS A LIAR! HE’S A FUCKING LIAR! SCP-1140-1: Let her out. I tire of her. She can't help me. (This is the only occasion SCP-1140-1 has spoken directly to a member of Foundation personnel.) End of Excerpt. Interview 1140-F4 Hide Log 1140-F4 Excerpt from Test Interview 1140-F4 (D-49283, 28yo male, brain damaged following a prison stabbing.): SCP-1140-1: I can hear you breathing. It’s rude to not say hello. D-49283: What? Where are you in there? (D-49283 begins pulling at the drawer; when it is fully open, he reaches inside.) SCP-1140-1: Please, I would rather you did not do that. D-49283: Where are you in there? (Becomes agitated.) SCP-1140-1: Stop that, I would much rather we (At this point D-49283 pulls his hand back and begins crying. There is a laceration on the back of his hand and wrist approximately 8mm deep and 65mm long.) D-49283: You hurt me. You hurt ██████. SCP-1140-1: Well, ██████, I did ask you not to. I would recommend applying pressure to that with a dry cloth, and then apply ointment to it to assist healing. I apologise for my actions. End of Excerpt. During the test conversations the area behind the drawer was constantly monitored by an endoscopic camera, a thermometer, and barometric indicators; at no point was there any change in any of the readings. During the conversation in which a D-class was injured, the camera showed no movement apart from the injury itself, which occurred between frames of the video. Footnotes 1. This allows for changes due to humidity and moisture absorption. 2. Testing suggests that an individual with an IQ of less than 55 will prompt anomalous behaviour, but to ascertain a more accurate figure would require unreasonable resources. 3. Access to this data is Level 5 only. 4. Operation Durden is a system of scanning computers which search the databases of psychiatric institutions for keywords which may suggest anomalous behaviour; in this case, the keywords were ‘imaginary friend’ crossreferenced with ‘████████’.

SCP-2861 is a phenomenon affecting the ████████ Cemetery located in ██████, the Netherlands, involving living human individuals spontaneously appearing in coffins buried at the graveyard.

*** Item #: SCP-2861 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: Instances of SCP-2861-1 are to remain on the premises of the cemetery. A perimeter has been established around said premises and is to be patrolled hourly by Foundation security personnel on rotating 8-hour shifts. Any unauthorized individuals attempting to enter the cemetery are to be turned away and given the explanation of an ongoing grounds refurbishment project. The groundskeeper's cottage and visitor center on the cemetery premises have been re-purposed for Foundation use. At least three Level-3 containment specialists are to remain on the cemetery grounds; additional personnel and heavy equipment vehicle support may be requested from any nearby Foundation sites. All personnel assigned to SCP-2861 must have prior training for administering emergency treatment of psychological trauma. As of ██/██/████, all interred coffins on the cemetery premises have been equipped with digital pressure sensors and are under observation via an infrared camera network. Upon either of these systems indicating atypical activity below-ground, personnel are to immediately exhume the coffin at the corresponding location. Any individuals, alive or dead, recovered as a result are to be transported to the medical section of the Foundation-modified visitor center for further inspection and care. Description: SCP-2861 is a phenomenon affecting the ████████ Cemetery located in ██████, the Netherlands, involving living human individuals spontaneously appearing in coffins buried at the graveyard. Affected coffins are designated as instances of SCP-2861-1, and are noted to cease exhibiting SCP-2861 effects upon removal from their corresponding gravesite.1 Carbon dating indicates that SCP-2861-1 instances were created during the 18th and 19th centuries. The coffins are plainly-crafted from oak and pine wood, and possess no external ornamentation; the interior of the coffins are similarly plain and have no cushioning material. All SCP-2861-1 instances have been noted to be stamped with icons imitating existing commercial leisure travel agency logos. None of the agency names present on these icons are consistent with any known travel companies. The first five SCP-2861-1 instances were initially retrieved after a cemetery caretaker contacted local police authorities to report hearing "yelling and banging" from certain gravesites. In the following Foundation intervention, containment specialists discovered an extremely distressed, though medically stable, woman2 within one of the coffins. The remaining reported gravesites were searched, and four bodies of recently-deceased individuals were recovered from coffins also containing partially-decomposed remains of those originally interred. To determine the extent of the anomaly manifestation, █ additional gravesites were exhumed, but the coffins removed possessed no remarkable contents. Since the Foundation's initial observation of the SCP-2861 anomaly in 1980, human individuals have continued to spontaneously appear within instances of SCP-2861-1, often exhibiting various levels of mental distress. All of the individuals involved report having no memory of the circumstances preceding their appearing in SCP-2861-1, though in nearly every recorded case, the individuals involved were clothed in sleepwear or similarly light garments. Additionally, in some instances, small objects similar to free hotel amenity items3 have been discovered tucked into SCP-2861 victims' clothing. Attempts to trace these products to a supplier are ongoing. Addendum 2861-1: Of all current survivors4, Mr. Jacob Van Dijk (34 years old at time of recovery) has been deemed the most lucid. Mr. Van Dijk was recovered from the seventh instance of SCP-2861-1 to manifest, and was noted to have possessed an unusually calm demeanor during the initial extraction from the SCP-2861-1 instance, despite his having been transported into a coffin already occupied by a newly-buried corpse. Dr. de Graaf, the medical personnel member assigned to oversee Mr. Van Dijk's therapy sessions, is currently researching Mr. Van Dijk's atypical restraint in relation to other case studies involving SCP-2861. Addendum 2861-2: Currently, all known survivors of SCP-2861 anomaly manifestations have exhibited behaviors believed to be consistent with DSM-5 diagnoses of Schizotypal personality disorder5. While attempted regularly, interviews with survivors capable of coherent speech do not often yield actionable data. (See Interview Log 2861-██-████ for a case excerpt.) Interview Log 2861-██-████ Note: This interview was conducted in Dutch and has been translated into English. Interviewer: Dr. Martijn de Graaf Interviewee: Mr. Jacob Van Dijk, retrieved from SCP-2861-██ on ██/██/████ Dr. de Graaf: Is the level of light to your preference, Mr. Jacobs? Mr. Van Dijk: It is a little too bright. Dr. de Graaf: If the lights are any dimmer you will not be able to see anything. Mr. Van Dijk: Yes. I miss that, truthfully. Closing my eyes helps me remember, but it is not quite the same. Dr. de Graaf: The same as what? Mr. Van Dijk: The same as sleeping like the dead. It was an experience. Like the most expensive spa. Dr. de Graaf: What do you think about when you close your eyes? Mr. Van Dijk: The graveyard.6 Dr. de Graaf: You wish to return there? Mr. Van Dijk: It is the most peaceful place that I know of. I am not surprised they were upset if some people did not like it. Maybe I will return on the next holiday. Dr. de Graaf: I understand. We will do our best to accommodate you. Mr. Van Dijk: Please put me back there sometime. It was so comfortable and quiet. + Authorized personnel only. - Security clearance accepted. When the cemetery premises' basement used for embalming no longer offered sufficient space for the number of individuals affected by SCP-2861, a new facility was constructed to serve as a space for psychiatric treatment. To the public, this building is explained as being a private crematorium for members of an undisclosed family. Thus far, no common or Foundation-developed treatments have permanently improved the mental health of SCP-2861 victims. Currently, the method that has received the most consistently positive reaction involves allowing the patients to sleep in specially-designed wall cavities lined with dirt. Note from Dr. de Graaf: The patients seem to respond best to someone else (or an automated system) letting them out after they are done sleeping. They prefer not to rely on themselves to choose when to get up. Addendum 2861-3: Trace samples of DNA, most commonly bloodstains and fragments of human fingernails, have been recovered from the woodwork of SCP-2861-1 instances. Carbon dating of these remains reveals that the oldest samples are estimated to be nearly 200 years old, while the most recent are dated at approximately 1970. In █ cases, genetic material from more than one individual was recovered from a single instance of SCP-2861-1. As of ██/██/████, the Foundation has recovered ██ individuals, living and newly-deceased, from SCP-2861-1 instances. It has been noted that consistently throughout these cases, those who suffered asphyxiation had panicked and damaged the corresponding coffin, while the survivors left the contents of their coffins undisturbed. Words carved into the coffin wood by victims of SCP-2861 have, as recently as ██/██/████, been accompanied by text etched into the wood reading, "Uw zorgen zijn genoteerd."7 Footnotes 1. Experimental data indicates that re-interring formerly-exhumed SCP-2861-1 instances does not cause the anomalous effects to re-manifest. Discussion is ongoing regarding the feasibility of removing all coffins from the cemetery. 2. Later confirmed to be 21-year-old Lily ████████. Further information on the individual's psychological state is currently unavailable, pending psychiatric treatment at the ████ clinic and Ms. ████████ regaining her ability to communicate verbally. 3. Examples include small bottles of garlic-scented liquid soap, packets of unbranded tea mixed with leek stems, and cellophane-wrapped mints containing pieces of fennel. 4. In the majority of recorded cases, victims of SCP-2861 expired from asphyxiation before Foundation personnel were able to reach them, despite all efforts to exhume graves quickly. 5. Characterized by, among other symptoms, strange beliefs or magical thinking and abnormal perceptual experiences. 6. Translated from "De begraafplaats", though the semantic equivalent is, "the place in which people are put underground". 7. Rough translation from Dutch, "Your concerns are noted."

SCP-4302 is a phenomenon with an unclear chronology.

*** Item #: SCP-4302 Object Class: Keter Special Containment Procedures: The container for SCP-4302 is located within Site-812. It is to be constructed out of plywood and polyurethane foam, and must measure exactly 35 meters by 70 meters. This is despite the fact that such a container already exists. The entire site is to be lined with Standard Xyank-Stevensohn Reversal Manifestors; SRAs have no effect. Three times a month, SCP-4302 has manifested. Under no circumstances are personnel to approach the container, as the exact location and nature of the force inside are poorly understood. Personnel may be putting themselves at an unnecessary risk both to themselves and the long-term containment of SCP-4302. Testing is to be done with remotely activated drones, who are then to be constructed in order to facilitate testing. No security cameras of any kind are allowed within Site-812, and no cameras of any kind are allowed within the 35 kilometer security perimeter surrounding Site-812. If in the event of personnel becoming a target, the Foundation as a whole should be prepared to have records changed or deleted. This is normal. Agents assigned are to investigate maternity wards worldwide for any personnel lost to SCP-4302, and offer any civilians affected A-class amnestics. Description: SCP-4302 is a phenomenon with an unclear chronology. Site-812 was a former technology park in Northeastern Iowa. Developer records at Sanderson, Lammeo, & Houtz Realty Inc. indicate a planned ground-breaking ceremony around 2020. Eyewitness accounts place the first manifestation of SCP-4302 precisely around June 2010. There have been no businesses in the development since 1980. SCP-4302 occurs three times a month, every month, during the full moon, and physically begins with the manifestation of a white 2007 Toyota Camry in the east parking lot. The Camry has no fuel. The headlights are illuminating a small pile of filmmaking equipment1, alongside two towels, a wooden chair, a Penn State University sweatshirt , a box of Nestle brand bottled water, and a tray of thirty-five assorted cookies. Notably, no cameras are present in the equipment. Next, patches of space across the technology park cease movement on the molecular level, with dimensions matching those of various cinematic aspect ratios. Following this, [DATA EXPUNGED] this marks the emergence of the [REDACTED] which is identical to a 'target', although all concrete evidence suggests that the individual in question was always there. It has been determined through rigorous testing that this is not actually SCP-4302 itself. Aside from being a theorized viewing system, what it actually is, is unknown. Once it locks on to the 'target' [REDACTED] initially happens before the symptoms progress, typically mimicking dementia, but not dementia itself. Subjects are unable to run, occasionally unable to see as it approaches. Imaging of the body during these events suggests the actual nerves within the eyes are severed through unknown means. This is consistent with visual identification of it. Age of corpse is several years before individual's birth. There is no memetic effect to SCP-4302. However, the sky above the event displays no stars. This effect is extant for 35km surrounding Site-812. Detail enlarged. [CONTEXT REDACTED] Researchers have determined that, although it cast a shadow, it was neither alive nor an object. [DATA EXPUNGED]. Civilian authorities have no evidence of any individual who could have committed such an act attending any university, nor making any purchases. Forensic paleontologists working concurrently in seventy-five regions have noted the evidence of a murder stretches as far back as the Cretaceous Period. The temporal effects of SCP-4302 make this identification difficult. The artifacts recovered from Mongolia and the Hell Creek Badlands indicate there never was any blood on the lens. Footnotes 1. Consisting of microphone, boom pole, lens case (containing two lenses, 35mm and 70mm), microphone case, cords, battery packs, and slate. More by this author Hide list SCPs SCP-3999 Rating: 2190 SCP-2432 Rating: 364 SCP-Big egg Rating: 328 SCP-4012 Rating: 216 SCP-3000-J Rating: 203 SCP-2817 Rating: 147 SCP-5702 Rating: 139 SCP-2714 Rating: 132 SCP-4930 Rating: 111 SCP-3520 Rating: 108 SCP-3672 Rating: 85 SCP-5401 Rating: 81 SCP-3643 Rating: 48 SCP-5598 Rating: 43 SCP-4875 Rating: 40 SCP-2302 Rating: 38 SCP-4701 Rating: 37 SCP-2653 Rating: 37 SCP-5753 Rating: 34 SCP-6881 Rating: 33 SCP-3796 Rating: 25 SCP-4302 Rating: 23 SCP-4753 Rating: 20 Tales asmr by dado Rating: 198 Excerpt from The Astrolabe Institute Journal Rating: 142 RONALD REAGAN CUT UP WHILE RAPPING Rating: 133 Amnestic Rating: 42 The William Penn Iteration Rating: 38 The News Tonight: Wednesday April 26th 2017 Rating: 30 The Undoing Rating: 26 Holy Mackerel Rating: 24 Portrait of Two Choreographers Rating: 21 End Of Deaf; or, In the Clutches of Dumb Rating: 20 Grandchildren Frost Rating: 20 Wade Williams Distribution Presents: Rating: 18 The DevourerLand Diaries Rating: 9

SCP-4419 is a vehicle resembling an ambulance of varying make and model which will spontaneously appear in an area shortly before a medical emergency arises.

*** Item #: SCP-4419 Object Class: Keter Special Containment Procedures: Due to the expansive range of circumstances in which SCP-4419 manifestations occur, containment efforts are to focus on information control and post-manifestation cleanup rather than physical imprisonment. Any witnesses to an SCP-4419 manifestation are to be dosed with a Class-B or Class-A amnestic as appropriate for their level of exposure. In cases where it is possible to restore the bodies of SCP-4419 victims to roughly standard human configurations, a cover story is to be established to explain any remaining damage as a result of their original injuries. In cases where this is not feasible, victims of SCP-4419 are to be brought into custody and, if possible, euthanized. A cover story is then to be established regarding the death of the victim due to their original injuries or conditions. Description: SCP-4419 is a vehicle resembling an ambulance of varying make and model which will spontaneously appear in an area shortly before a medical emergency arises. The means by which SCP-4419 predicts these situations is currently unknown. Although the appearance of SCP-4419 differs from manifestation to manifestation, it will always resemble an ambulance appropriate for the local culture. Upon the occurrence of the medical emergency, SCP-4419 will proceed directly to the injured individual, hereafter referred to as the victim. Two individuals of varying physical appearances in paramedic uniforms will then exit from the back of SCP-4419, secure the victim, and bring them back with them into SCP-4419. The individuals that emerge from SCP-4419 will behave as expected for a medical professional in the situation, but will repel any attempt by others to prevent them securing the victim via extreme physical force. Once the victim has been secured within SCP-4419, it will leave the area at extreme speeds, disappearing the moment it is outside of observation. Two to seven days later, the victim will be returned outside a local area, suffering from extreme and invasive bodily modifications. Although the majority of these alterations would logically result in the death of the victim, death will not occur in these cases unless the modifications are tampered with or otherwise undone. The specific nature of these modifications differs from case to case, although there does appear to be a level of correlation with the original medical emergency. (See Encounter Log 4419-1.) Encounter Log 4419-1: The following is a log of encounters with SCP-4419, the original medical emergencies in each case, and the bodily modifications applied to the victim. Note that this log does not encapsulate all known SCP-4419 victims, and a full record is available upon request from the data archive at Site-31. Date Medical Emergency Bodily Modification 07/02/1983 A braking car hits a pedestrian crossing the street, resulting in a broken leg. Victim returned with all limbs amputated and relocated to protrude directly from his torso. Limbs were re-amputated and a cover story was established to explain the loss of limbs as the result of a much more severe car accident. 23/11/1994 A man suffers from a broken jaw following a fight outside a bar. Victim returned with his jaw forced permanently open. In addition, a glass window was installed in the mouth to permit viewing of the heart, which had been relocated to the back of the throat. Due to the relocation of the heart, reversion of the body modifications was not possible, and the victim was euthanized. 19/06/1999 A homeless man suffers from a drug overdose. Victim returned to the same place he was originally taken from. The top of the victim's skull had been removed, and the brain crudely scooped out and placed into the victim's hands, which had been fused together in front of him. While being brought into custody, the victim's brain fell out of his hands and he instantly expired1. 29/01/2003 A wife and husband involved in a car crash suffer numerous broken bones and severe bleeding. Victims returned fused together by their backs. All bones that had been broken in the original accident were meticulously removed, resulting in the loss of use of some limbs. The victims were successfully separated, administered amnestics as appropriate and their modified limbs were amputated. 15/02/2006 An elderly man suffers from a heart attack. Victim was returned with eleven additional and non-functional hearts within his body stuffed between his existing organs. Expiration occurred when surgeons attempted to remove these additional hearts before agents could arrive on the scene. Surgeons and medical staff who had treated the victim were administered amnestics, and the body confiscated. 19/09/2008 A fire at a bar results in nineteen people suffering from severe burns. An additional seven people suffer from skull fractures and broken bones when they attempt to confront the individuals who emerge from SCP-4419, and are also taken as victims. It is believed existing injuries were exacerbated, and new injuries caused, by attempting to force twenty-six people into the limited space within SCP-4419. Victims returned to the local community center as a single watery mass which twitches and shivers when physical contact is applied. As no method of euthanizing the victims could be found, they are currently stored in a liquid tank at Site-31. 24/11/2014 A US Military private is shot while on patrol in Afghanistan. Due to the suspicious nature of SCP-4419's arrival and the forceful securing of the private, other soldiers on the patrol fire upon SCP-4419 as it leaves. Witnesses report seeing a viscous black fluid leaking from the resultant bullet-holes in SCP-4419's surface. Victim is found broken down into a thin paste and spread over the walls of their barracks the next day. The agents who initially secured the remains reported seeing a mostly intact eyeball dilate when they approached. Although what has been brought into storage is referred to for convenience's sake as 'remains', it is currently not known whether or not the victim has expired. Footnotes 1. Note that at no point was the victim's brain actually connected to his nervous system.

SCP-331 is a red plastic cat collar, approximately 23cm in length.

*** Item #: SCP-331 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: When not being used, SCP-331 is to be kept within a typical electronic 7-digit metal safe in Dr. ███████’s office. The code is to be changed on a monthly basis by Dr. ███████. Personnel who wish to examine SCP-331 must ask Dr. ███████ for authorization beforehand. As of ██/██/██ SCP-331 is worn by SCP-331-1. Description: SCP-331 is a red plastic cat collar, approximately 23 cm in length. Metal studs surround the collar in intervals of 1 cm; testing has confirmed the metal to be nickel. The bell consists of stainless steel electroplated with 24-carat gold. Ringing the bell has no distinguishable effect, adverse or otherwise. The word “Tumbles” has been painted on the back of the collar in yellow paint; testing has confirmed that there is nothing unusual about the paint. SCP-331 exhibits no abnormal tendencies when worn by a living cat. When SCP-331 is fastened round the neck of a deceased cat (hereafter SCP-331-1), SCP-331-1 is resurrected with no initial adverse effects. The collar does not halt the decomposition process, however; fur and skin still rot at a regular pace. Organs are unaffected by the decomposition process; testing has yet to determine the exact cause for this. SCP-331-1 shows no signs of distress during the decomposition process. SCP-331-1 can be killed by conventional methods, whereupon it remains deceased. The separation of SCP-331 and SCP-331-1 [DATA EXPUNGED] unless SCP-331-1 is deceased. It should be noted that SCP-331-1 always answers to ‘Tumbles’ and has an amiable personality, despite what it was called or how it behaved pre-mortem. SCP-331 was discovered when reports reached Agent █████ of a ‘zombie cat’ witnessed around ███████ Park in █████████, ██. Agent █████ immediately alerted the Foundation of a possible outbreak of SCP-008; MTF-██ was dispatched and neutralized SCP-331-1, whereupon it was transported to Site ██ after no trace of SCP-008 was detected. Upon arrival research was conducted on SCP-331 that confirmed its properties.

SCP-5591 is a toy oven resembling similar products manufactured in the early 2000s.

*** Item #: SCP-5591 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-5591 is to be kept in a standard storage locker in Site-17. Testing is not to occur more than once a week month quarter. Though 5591 is believed to be unique, any other potential instances of 5591 or similar phenomena are to be secured and contained by MTF Iota-6 ("Cavity Fillers"). Update 3/26/20: Testing on SCP-5591 has been indefinitely halted. MTF Iota-6 is now directly working on uncovering and identifying the people behind "Sugarcomb Confectionery." Description: SCP-5591 is a toy oven resembling similar products manufactured in the early 2000s. The oven itself is nonanomalous in make, comprised of metal and plastic with incandescent light bulbs providing the heat source. Rather than coming with premeasured packets like similar toys, SCP-5591 includes a recipe book (SCP-5591-1) designed to be used with common ingredients as well as a simple set of measuring utensils. When prepared on their own recipes are innocuous, but gain the described anomalous properties if prepared with SCP-5591. After baking, any recipe prepared using SCP-5591 comes out looking exactly as pictured in 5591-1, regardless of any mistakes made in the preparation of the recipe or lack of a defining feature. When a subject consumes the cooked food, they begin to experience various anomalous phenomena. Branding on the oven, recipe book, and auxiliary pieces indicate the oven was produced by "Sugarcomb Confectionery (in association with MWDOT, Inc.1)." Addendum 5591-A: Testing log The following table shows the results of initial testing of recipes contained within SCP-5591-1 Recipe Name Preparation Notes Effect upon consumption Additional Information "Fudging Brownies" Recipe contained no leavening agent as commonly used in brownies. D-2837 found themselves unable to make a single truthful statement. Effect ceased after approximately one hour. "Twistiest Pretzels" N/A D-2837 began contorting their body in complex ways amidst protests of discomfort. They seemed to have no control over their body during this time. Effect ceased after 30 minutes. D-2837 requested to be transferred to another anomaly. Request denied. "Rainbow Confetti Cupcakes" Unbaked recipe resembled a simple white cake mix. No dyes or sprinkles were added prior to baking. D-2837 expressed mild stomach pain shortly after consumption. The pain supposedly escalated as loud sounds were heard coming from D-2837's stomach, leading to immediate hospitalization. Foundation doctors discovered copious amounts of small color sprinkles of various kinds in D-2837's stomach. D-2837 is to be amnesticized and transferred to another anomaly following recovery. "Brittlest Peanut Brittle" Brittle is not typically cooked in any sort of oven. Recipe suggested alternative brittles for those with peanut allergies. D-8263 reported no effect at first, but shortly thereafter reported feeling weaker. Upon examination by Foundation doctors, it was discovered that D-8263 had developed Osteogenesis imperfecta2, despite having never been tested for this before. Effect has not ceased after several months. "Jammy Surprise" Recipe contained no picture, but seemed to be meant to make a simple turnover. The information on this recipe reads: "In hopes that this will yield satisfactory tribute for MWDOT." Recipe was not consumed; see Additional Information. The recipe came out of the oven resembling a severed human toe, and as such was not consumed by D-8263. Testing on the toe confirmed it was a genetic match for SCP-████ and was carefully placed into containment as SCP-████-1. Testing is ongoing to see if SCP-████-1 retains ████'s combustive properties. To date, no other connection has been found between SCP-5591 and ████, though confirmation is difficult since ████ breached containment. Due to the nature of ████'s containment breach as well as the results from the "Jammy Surprise," research into Sugarcomb Confectionery's potential connection to known karcist sects is ongoing. Addendum 5591-B: Interview with POI-6870 On April 16th, 2020, Foundation webcrawlers tracked the initialism MWDOT to several users associated with GOI-5869 ("Gamers Against Weed"). None of the involved users agreed to come in for questioning, but shortly thereafter one of the founders (POI-6870) reached out to Foundation authorities with the intent of scheduling a video conference. The conference took place on the 18th of that month, and is transcribed as follows. Dr. Oliveras: Hello. Thank you for reaching out to us, POI-6870. (Pause) Sorry, there doesn't seem to be any video coming from your end. POI-6870: Don't worry about that. Now, uh, what's this I hear about you harassing the gamers? Dr. Oliveras: Harassing is a bit of an over-exaggeration. POI-6870: I thought the agreement was we stay out of your way, we don't harm others, and we don't "pierce the veil," and you leave us to our own devices. I've kept them in line. Am I to understand you're breaking our truce? Dr. Oliveras: We don't see calling in members of your group as a breach of our agreement, especially when said members seem to be connected to a poorly understood anomaly and an as of yet unsolved containment breach. POI-6870: What the hell are you talking about? Dr. Oliveras: Do you recognize this? (Oliveras holds up an image of SCP-5591.) POI-6870: Easy bake oven? What does this have to do with anything? Dr. Oliveras: No? What about this? (Oliveras holds up an image of SCP-████-1.) POI-6870: What is that, a severed toe? What… Oh. Oh no. Dr. Oliveras: So you do recognize it. POI-6870: …Yes and no. What does this have to do with the members you contacted? Dr. Oliveras: Do the letters M-W-D-O-T mean anything to you? (Silence. After a few seconds suppressed laughter can be heard.) POI-6870: Shit. Out of all the things to explain. Before I answer, what does that have to do with the oven? Dr. Oliveras: The oven as well as its accessories claim to be made by "Sugarcomb Confectionery" and MWDOT, Incorporated. "Sugarcomb" is a name we're familiar with. "MWDOT" eludes us. What does it mean? POI-6870: You're gonna think I'm joking. Dr. Oliveras: Mr. Kriyot, just tell us what those letters mean. POI-6870: It stands for "Mother Who Demands One's Toes." (More suppressed laughter can be heard.) Dr. Oliveras: …One of your memes, I presume? POI-6870: That's the funny part. We had nothing to do with that name. We think it comes from the Hand. Dr. Oliveras: What does it mean? POI-6870: Not really sure. Not entirely. From what I can tell, she's this big scary karcist lady. Has a massive halkost, huge following, blah blah blah. Though if Sugarcomb is involved with her… shit, how deep does this conspiracy go? Dr. Oliveras: So you didn't know about Sugarcomb's involvement with this? POI-6870: No dude. I mean, I guess it makes sense they'd be involved, right? They don't really have a rhyme or a reason to what they do. But why would the karcists work with them? Dr. Oliveras: You mentioned the Hand, I presume you mean the GOI known as "The Serpent's Hand." What do they have to do with this? Furthermore, what does your group have to do with this? POI-6870: Yeah, Serpent's Hand are fighting her, we think. Mekhanites, too, it seems. Gamers Against Weed just happens to have a few good sources. Those sources told us what that toe does. And that the other nine do the same thing. (Pause.) Wait, what does the oven have to do with the toe? Dr. Oliveras: SCP-5591 — the oven — produced SCP— the toe, through anomalous means. POI-6870: Huh. Wonder where that toe came from. Dr. Oliveras: You recognized it, so surely you know where the others are. POI-6870: Some of them. The Mekhanites are just trying to play keep away with them, but toe mama still has most of them. A few of them have blown up. But with the reveal that you have one, well, that throws everything we know into question. (Dr. Oliveras begins to speak but is interrupted.) Wait, I think I get it now! The karcists want to create more toes, because they think it will please her. But I'm betting it doesn't create new toes, it just summons them. (Laughter can be heard.) This is the most incredibly stupid thing I've ever heard. Dr. Oliveras: Do you know what the… mother… plans on doing with them? POI-6870: Hmmm… I don't think that's the right question. I don't think she wants to do anything with them. I think the proper question is "what do her followers plan on doing with them?" (POI-6870 disconnected immediately following this and has not responded to further attempts to contact him or GOI-5869) #toesplosion2020 toejamcon2020 Single: [untitled] Footnotes 1. The Foundation is unaware of any such incorporation, and the initialism MWDOT seems to be unregistered. 2. A genetic disorder that primarily makes bones brittle

SCP-1438 is a Live Action Role-Playing (LARP) Game that occurs at residential university and college campuses in the Midwestern United States1.

*** Item #: SCP-1438 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: SCP-1438-1 is to be monitored to foresee any SCP-1438 activity, and active SCP-1438 sessions are to be remotely observed by the nearest Foundation facility. Campuses in which sessions of SCP-1438 are taking place are to be operated as normal, as students, faculty and staff give no recognition to anomalous activity caused by SCP-1438. As it is impossible for participants playing a session of SCP-1438 to not be affected by it, no Foundation personnel are to participate in SCP-1438 except under experimental conditions. No anomalous properties in SCP-1438-3 instances manifest outside of the context of SCP-1438, but as a precaution, confiscated instances of SCP-1438-3 are to be disposed of through incineration. Description: SCP-1438 is a Live Action Role-Playing (LARP) Game that occurs at residential university and college campuses in the Midwestern United States1. SCP-1438, colloquially known as "Invaders", "Invasion", "Attack of the Mind Worms", or "Takeover", is organized via SCP-1438-1, a website at the domain [REDACTED]; attempting to access this domain from non-university IP addresses results in a 404 message. Attempts by the Foundation to perform DDoS attacks or otherwise block access to SCP-1438-1 have resulted in computers used to access the website to be permanently banned from access. Contact has been established with the administrator of SCP-1438-1 (listed as one "Jack Finney") several times; however, exchanges have been largely uninformative, with Mr. Finney preferring to promote SCP-1438 as opposed to answering questions about its origin and anomalous properties. University and college students that register their schools on SCP-1438-1 and sign up at least 30 participants for a session of SCP-1438 can order equipment necessary for a game of SCP-1438 for no cost, and designate a date on which the game is to begin. This equipment is delivered to all participants of SCP-1438, and includes: One (1) ████-brand foam dart launcher of various make, along with 50 darts per gun Twelve (12) pairs of socks, which serve as grenades in the context of SCP-1438 One (1) polyethylene sword, or "Joplin Plasma Blade" A set of Rules for playing SCP-1438; violation of any rule is grounds for ejection from the game, and therefore "death" of the participant. See Document 1438-01 for a partial set of rules. One (1) patch that denotes a random military rank, from private to captain; in addition to this, the player who begins the "invasion" will have a set of temporary tattoos marked with the symbol pictured above; this symbol on its own has no anomalous properties, but for the sake of this document will be referred to as SCP-1438-2. The goal of a game of SCP-1438 is, for the side of the Humans, to eliminate all Invaders through force. Meanwhile, the Invader's goal is to turn humans into invaders by marking them with SCP-1438-2 and "alter the electrical activity in the brain to be identical to that of the Invader's spawn". On the date that a game of SCP-1438 is to commence, all participants gather in a central location. From this point on, participants enter a fugue state while not in designated safe zones. While in this state, the "Humans" and "Invaders" (designated SCP-1438-A and SCP-1438-B respectively) believe that they are engaged in a secret conflict with each other. SCP-1438-B instances have the objective to convert all SCP-1438-A instances into SCP-1438-B by covertly marking them with SCP-1438-2. Each game starts with a single instance of SCP-1438-B, who applies SCP-1438-2 to an area of skin normally concealed by clothing, thus adding to the population of SCP-1438-B. Notably, instances of SCP-1438-A are able to accurately recall biographical information up to their enrollment in college, at which point they learned about the Invaders and joined the conflict. Instances of SCP-1438-B have trouble properly displaying human emotions, often engage in mucophagy, onychophagy and trichophagy, speak in an unidentified language or code, and have a habit of recreating SCP-1438-2 to mark territory controlled by SCP-1438-B. One of the optional goals in a game of SCP-1438 for SCP-1438-A is to capture an instance of SCP-1438-B and interrogate them about technology apparently used by SCP-1438-B, specifically weapons technology2, as SCP-1438-B cannot be killed by default weaponry, only stunned as they "regenerate". Interrogation usually involves physical and psychological torture techniques, and as a reward for successfully coercing information from SCP-1438-B, the weapons of up to four instances of SCP-1438-A are converted into SCP-1438-3. SCP-1438-3 are functionally and visually identical to non-anomalous "weapons" delivered at the beginning of a game of SCP-1438, unless used by an instance of SCP-1438-A or SCP-1438-B. If used on an instance of SCP-1438-A or -B, the ████ launchers (SCP-1438-3A) turn into laser-like weaponry, capable of causing 4th degree burns;3 socks/grenades (SCP-1438-3B) emit a wavelength of light upon detonation that disintegrates human flesh; finally, the polyethylene swords (SCP-1438-3C) become [DATA EXPUNGED]. All individuals killed in a game of SCP-1438 through use of SCP-1438-3 are treated by all persons on-campus and relations as if they had transferred to another college and cut off all contact with friends, family, etc. Following the conclusion of a game of SCP-1438, all surviving SCP-1438-A or SCP-1438-B instances will resume their normal routine, and express interest in playing SCP-1438 again, if the opportunity arises. Should they choose to participate in another instance of SCP-1438, they will resume their former roles as instances of SCP-1438-A and SCP-1438-B. Furthermore, in between instances of SCP-1438, instances of SCP-1438-A and -B will re-enter fugue states when under stress, which typically last anywhere from 30 minutes to 4 hours. Students not participating in SCP-1438 will usually assume that all instances of SCP-1438-A and SCP-1438-B are simply staying in-character and do not wish to break it in case players are present. Faculty will view it with some degree of scorn, often citing it as a distraction from studies and that students participating in it could be doing better things with their time. Campus law enforcement notably do not attempt to confiscate weaponry used in a game of SCP-1438. Document 1438-01: Partial rules of SCP-1438. While conventional weapons do not work on Invaders, they can, and will, kill humans. Make sure the thing you're about to blow a hole in is actually Marked. Invaders, remember to re-apply your Mark every few days; there should be enough tattoos to last the duration of the game. The only official safe zones in a game of Invaders are restrooms and classrooms; everywhere else is fair game. Other safe zones can be determined by players on a college by college basis. No outside parties are permitted to engage in a game of Invaders; for a list of those playing the game, check your local Invaders database. This game can take a long time to play, but don't forget your studies. Remember, school work is always more important than the game. We don't want people flunking because they're too concerned about whether or not their friend is Marked. Document 1438-02: An excerpt from SCP-1438-1, describing the backstory of SCP-1438. They Came from the Stars… The Invaders came silently in the night. It started with a single person, but soon, they spread, overwriting the electrical impulses in the human brain to make them like themselves. They are numerous, and if not stopped, Earth will fall to them. The resistance is the last, best hope humanity has against the invaders. We've been fighting them since they first arrived, at the incident in Norwalk five years ago. You have just been inducted into the resistance, which has a single objective: to kill all of the Invaders at any cost. Never mind the fact that the Invaders were once a friend, a family member, a lover, a father, a mother, a child… once Marked, they are the enemy, and must be eliminated through any means possible. Nobody will miss them. All Invaders carry a Mark on their skin that they spread to normal humans, converting them over the course of six hours. Additionally, their regenerative capabilities make them impervious to bullets, grenades, even Joplin's newly developed plasma swords. However, they have knowledge of advanced weaponry. This knowledge can be coerced from them through various methods (the Geneva Convention doesn't apply to things that aren't human) that can eliminate them permanently. The Invaders have a single-minded goal: to take over the entire population of humans in the area, and from there, the planet as a whole. Footnotes 1. Including the states of Indiana, Illinois, Michigan, Ohio, West Virginia and Wisconsin, as well as the western counties of Pennsylvania and northern counties of Kentucky. 2. This technology is never actually used by instances of SCP-1438-B, as elimination of human targets is a losing condition for SCP-1438-B. 3. It has been noted that this weaponry operates as miniature versions of the weapons systems possessed by SCP-2820. Investigation into a potential link between Mr. Finney and the developers of SCP-2820 is ongoing.

SCP-3158 is a tropical island with an area of 4.

*** Item #: SCP-3158 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: Standard exclusionary precautions for medium-size stationary oceanic anomalies apply for SCP-3158. Expungement of SCP-3158 from satellite imagery is unnecessary. Access is denied to all personnel. Description: SCP-3158 is a tropical island with an area of 4.8km2 located 42 kilometers off the coast of ███████. Subjects present on SCP-3158 will secrete human blood, rather than tears, from their lacrimal glands. This does not result in irritation; rather, the blood adequately fulfills the functions of the tear film, albeit resulting in a red tint to the subject's vision. This effect ceases once the subject leaves SCP-3158. Affected subjects prefer not to acknowledge this effect, attempting to refocus any such discussion on SCP-3158's natural beauty, calmness, or exoticism. Excreted blood matches the genetic profile of [DATA LOST]. Subjects that observe a 15m x 60m area in the southeastern region of SCP-3158, designated SCP-3158-1, experience intense, painful hunger that does not abate until they leave SCP-3158. Subjects will attempt to consume any material they believe to be edible, save for components of humans they consider to be of similar or higher social status. No subject has voluntarily discussed this phenomenon, or their actions while under its effect; they instead attempt to refocus any such discussion on SCP-3158's suitability as a travel destination. Prior to Incident 3158-Alpha, SCP-3158-1 was the site of [DATA LOST]. SCP-3158 came to Foundation attention shortly thereafter, when several soldiers reported SCP-3158's anomalous effects.

SCP-1559 is a set of posters displaying the content "A FEW STILL LISTEN TO BIRDS" in different languages.

*** Item #: SCP-1559 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: Manifestations of SCP-1559 are to be removed from their original location and sheltered in Site-77 once discovered. All currently known SCP-1559 manifestations are contained in a high-security containment chamber at Site-77. Anyone requiring direct contact with SCP-1559 is to receive protective memetic inoculations against the effects of SCP-1559. Personnel already influenced by SCP-1559 are to receive Class-A amnestics to eliminate the mental effects of the project. Description: SCP-1559 is a set of posters displaying the content "A FEW STILL LISTEN TO BIRDS" in different languages. The language used in specific SCP-1559 manifestations depends on the native language of their creators1 and the primary language of the place SCP-1559 appears. SCP-1559 was discovered in 1997 during an environmentalist storming of a local KFC restaurant in Florida, USA, with several individuals later identified as SCP-1559-1 carrying placards with manifestations of SCP-1559. A total of 144 manifestations of SCP-1559 have been found in many cities including London, New York, Shanghai, Hong Kong, Singapore, Madrid, Paris, etc.. The manifestations are generally found in the downtown and business area, and current information suggests that areas with a high incidence of bird mortality are more likely to have SCP-1559 posted. In rare cases, instances of SCP-1559 will be carried by individuals of SCP-1559-1 rather than being posted somewhere. The anomalous properties of SCP-1559 will be activated when any human individual looks at a manifestation of SCP-1559 for more than 5 seconds, upon which the human individual is then transformed to an SCP-1559-1 entity. Once the anomalous properties of the item are triggered, the individual will become extremely sensitive to bird calls and will acquire the ability to understand the meaning of the bird's call. After a period of time, the SCP-1559-1 individual will exhibit the following five symptoms in chronological order. A male Resplendent quetzal. Showing a special fondness for birds. Developing beliefs regarding birds as divines. Attempting to protect birds and/or provide nesting sites, food, and water for birds at any costs. Showing extreme distaste for consumption of bird species. Mimicking birds in their daily-life behaviors. At the same time, SCP-1559-1 individuals will automatically gain knowledge of how to create SCP-1559 manifestations. These individuals will make additional manifestations of SCP-1559 and attempt to post them in the eligible locations described above. SCP-1559-1 may translate the language of the bird in a language that others can understand, but all refuse or claim to be unable to represent or demonstrate the process of creating SCP-1559 manifestations. Addendum I: Interviewing Record (1559-20120614A) To further investigate the nature of SCP-1559, D-19289 (male, 41 years old) was asked to look unprotected at an example of SCP-1559 written in his native language for 30 seconds. D-19289 was then confirmed to have successfully transformed into an individual SCP-1559-1. He was asked to live under surveillance in a forest cabin in Yucatan, Mexico, and to record the information contained in the bird calls he heard. Interviews with D-19289 were conducted every 30 days. Date：14 April 2012 Interviewed: D-19289 Interviewer: Dr. Arbuzov, Level 2 researcher in Site-77 <Begin Log> Dr. Arbuzov: Good morning. How are you feeling today? D-19289: Better than ever. Dr. Arbuzov: Oh? It's good to be happy. Can you give me a brief description? D-19289: The pleasant sound of birdsong here is very relaxing. Lately many birds outside have been clamouring for a date because it's Spring now, as you know. It's a nice treat to hear the birds singing to their beloved mates and enticing them to spend the gentle night together. Dr. Arbuzov: Oh, I'm glad to hear that. But how did you know that they are calling for mates? Can you understand what they're talking about? D-19289: Yes, after staring at the … strange poster, I think. Dr. Arbuzov: Would you mind telling me about the contents you heard from birds? D-19289: I'd certainly be happy to share! Well, I think Spring is the breeding season, so many birds are looking for mates. Other than that… it is basically all about "which area has better tasting fruits" and "which tree has more fat worms" and just … foraging for food. But there's other stuff too, like … Dr. Arbuzov: For example? D-19289: Occasionally some birds are frightened by wild animals and they will try to call for help or scare off their enemies. Some very small-mouthed birds also gossip, such as where they saw some people in the nearby town fight in their homes and other stuff like that. Another notable one, which I like hearing but I don’t quite understand the content, is something like a poem. Dr. Arbuzov: A poem? D-19289: Yes. Many of the birds here chant poetry. The content is largely similar, it seems almost like a narrative poem. One small bird in particular, with green back feathers, red belly feathers and a long tail, is particularly fond of singing this. Other birds often sing it, but I like it best when the poem is sung by the little green bird. Dr. Arbuzov: Care to tell me what they are about? D-19289: Sure! I've got it down on paper, I'll look for it … Children of the Second Sun Lost as the flame fell down Their world has been deeply buried Only the sky still opens its arms for them Messengers of the Second Sun Soaring above the earth Their splendor has been forgotten by most Only a few still listen to their song Descendants of the Second Sun Wandering through the flow of time Their desire has never been abandoned That the kingdom will reborn from the ashes Their last obsession is still circulating Their last descendants are still wondering That a few still listen to birds Dr. Arbuzov: What do you make of this poem? D-19289: I said I'm not quite clear about this, but it felt kinda moody. Very much the kind … of a lost civilization? Also, the songs from the little green birds are really nice. Dr. Arbuzov: Okay, I see. We'll allow you to stay here for a few more days, thank you very much for your cooperation. D-19289: That'd be great! <End Log> Date：14 May 2012 Interviewed: D-19289 Interviewer: Dr. Arbuzov, Level 2 researcher in Site-77 <Begin Log> Dr. Arbuzov: Long time no see. D-19289: Why don't you guys let me go out and rescue the birds? Dr. Arbuzov: I'm sorry, what did you say? D-19289: To find food and water for the birds, to build their nests, to keep them away from their natural enemies. Dr. Arbuzov: You're still a D-class in the Foundation. You are not allowed to leave. D-19289: You should let me out. All regulations set by you lowly humans are just nothing. Dr. Arbuzov: What do you mean? D-19289: Listen, serving the birds is our duty. the earth was once the kingdom of birds. We are nothing but usurpers. They should have been the masters of this place. Dr. Arbuzov: What are you talking about - Do you mean the poem? D-19289: That is not just a poem, that is a fact that once happened on Earth. Dr. Arbuzov: Well, As far as I know this has never happened. D-19289: The civilization of birds is much more holy than ours. Our civilization is dirty, ugly, and originates from sneaky actions. We should atone, lady. We should return the world to them. The birds have told me all these things. They have told me about their fallen glorious civilization. They are the Children of the Second Sun. Dr. Arbuzov: The fact is that birds are species that emerged quite late. At least as far as we know, birds are far away from being intelligent enough to build a civilization. D-19289: Humans have done so much shit to the planet. Don't try to make excuses for the despicable words and actions of humans. <End Log> The interview was aborted. Over the following month, the staff members responsible for guarding D-19289 repeatedly complained that D-19289 had attempted to force his way out of his room to "rescue birds" outside the cabin, and were also frequently asking the staff members if they "had ever eaten any of the birds". If a staff member responded in the affirmative, D-19289 would verbally abuse and attack the staff member. In addition, D-19289 continued to ask staff members for large amounts of "naturally fallen" bird feathers and wore clothing and accessories made from bird feathers in his daily life. Date：14 June 2012 Interviewed: D-19289 Interviewer: Dr. Arbuzov, Level 2 researcher in Site-77 <Begin Log> Dr. Arbuzov: Why are you dressed like that? D-19289: To bring me closer to a more noble form of life. kyow. Dr. Arbuzov: So you still insist on your opinion that birds are nobler than people. D-19289: It's a fact, Doctor. kyow. There had been many wise people like me. kyow. Dr. Arbuzov: Is that what you heard from those birds too? D-19289: Yes. Those little green birds told me that their clan has always been responsible for passing on the history of birds. kyow. Dr. Arbuzov: Okay. So what have they told you? I would love to know. D-19289: The native people here - they began to regard the birds as gods, to serve and care for them, just as they and we should do. kyow. You know? Dr. Arbuzov: Ugh. The native people, you mean the Aztecs and Mayans? D-19289: That's right. The damn colonists ruined it all. kyow. After that, the bird believers disappeared and the little birds stopped singing as happily as they did before the colonists came because no one continued to listen to birds anymore. kyow. Dr. Arbuzov: But the descendants of the Aztecs and Mayans are still alive, aren't they? D-19289: It's all about faith, Doctor, faith. There's hardly anyone who believes in birds anymore or knows the sins they once committed against birds. kyow. Dr. Arbuzov: Well … I think I don't have more questions to ask. Your duty is completed today. Do you have any other things you want to say or ask? D-19289: Do you eat birds? <End Log> After the experiment, D-19289 received Class-A amnestics. Thereafter, D-19289 demonstrated no further obsession with birds. Likewise, he no longer had the ability to understand or use bird language. Addendum II: Interviewing Record (1559-20170426F) with Individual SCP-1559-1-A After several years of investigation and interrogation, the Foundation confirmed the identity of SCP-1559-1-A, the original maker of SCP-1559, as a 69-year-old male, Juan Alvarado. SCP-1559-1-A is a native of Nahua, Mexico, and a former zoologist studying birds of prey. After his identity was confirmed, SCP-1559-1-A agreed to be interviewed at the request of the Foundation. Date：26 April 2017 Interviewed: SCP-1559-1-A Interviewer: Dr. Arbuzov, Level 2 researcher in Site-77 <Begin Log> Dr. Arbuzov: Good morning, Mr. Alvarado, let's cut to the chase. we just want to ask you about those posters. (holds up an image of SCP-1559) Are you the original creator of those posters? SCP-1559-1-A: Well … You guessed right. Dr. Arbuzov: Yes. We are not intending to harm you, we just want to ask you to explain how and why you did it? SCP-1559-1-A: Sorry, actually the principle is not very clear to me. I can't express the process. I could demonstrate all the technical details to you, but I refuse to do so, given that you may want to stop our action. Dr. Arbuzov: Well, I respect your opinion for the moment. Could you tell us if you learned this technique from somewhere, or did you invent it yourself? SCP-1559-1-A: The technology used for creating this was handed down in our culture from ancient times, and I just modernized it a little. Just things like replacing the manual work drawing with a printer, replacing the content with more concise and understandable text, and making it a poster. You know, now that the whole world is developing quickly, something like this should also change with the times. Dr. Arbuzov: Uh, I still don't get the point, are there any reasons for creating such things? SCP-1559-1-A: It's what we believe in. Dr. Arbuzov: Belief? Do you mean the belief that birds are more advanced than humans, that humans stole the civilization of birds or something? SCP-1559-1-A: There are very few people who believe in birds anymore, very few are still listening to birds, Doctor. There are very few people left who are truly wise, who are willing to redeem themselves, who are willing to accept true knowledge. Dr. Arbuzov: So you are saying that there used to be a lot of them? I did hear some stories about the Aztecs or the Mayans believing in birds. SCP-1559-1-A: There were once many people who believed in birds in this land. The ancient priests, by chance, received a revelation from the feathered serpent, mastered the technique of creating these things, and then learned to listen to birds. Thus, we were able to better listen to the voice of the gods. Now this valuable wisdom has been almost lost, and I think it is my duty to keep it alive. Dr. Arbuzov: Uh, I don't quite understand. As far as we know, these posters do make people believe in birds, but I don't quite understand what this has to do with the feathered serpent. SCP-1559-1-A: The birds were always singing a ballad over and over again. All birds can sing the ballad, but Resplendent quetzals sang the most and the best. This ballad described the revelation of the feathered serpent, which is why Resplendent quetzals were regarded as incarnations of the feathered serpent. Dr. Arbuzov: The ballad? Do you mean the poem that ends with "A few still listen to the birds"? SCP-1559-1-A: Yes. The poem tells us that human beings do not necessarily deserve everything they've got and that our ancestors stole the earth from the birds while their world was in chaos. Dr. Arbuzov: Sorry, no offense to your beliefs, Mr. Alvarado. But I must say that as a zoologist who studies birds, you should also be well aware that birds have never dominated the earth. SCP-1559-1-A: It is true that birds have not, but their ancestors did. This is not just my gibberish, science can prove it. Dr. Arbuzov: Ancestors? Wait, you mean dinosaurs - indeed, dinosaurs are considered to be the ancestors of birds, that is to say - SCP-1559-1-A: You see, in traditional Aztec belief, the second sun, the feathered serpent, came down to create the third generation of the earth's inhabitants, which was destroyed by the rain of flame. While we are still trying to study the history of the earth, the birds have already told us everything. Isn't that enough of a statement? Dr. Arbuzov: Could you please explain? SCP-1559-1-A: You should know that some species of dinosaurs had feathers, just like the legendary feathered serpent god. After all, the descendants of the feathered serpent should have a similar appearance to the feathered serpent god, right? Then, 65 million years ago, a meteorite landed here on the Yucatan Peninsula, bringing with it a rain of fire. All of this has been fully described by the poem and by our ancient and sacred beliefs, isn’t that enough? Dr. Arbuzov: But - I mean, why do you make these posters? I can't see any logical connections between what you are saying and these posters. I don't understand. What does this have to do with us? SCP-1559-1-A: For 65 million years, the descendants of dinosaurs have not forgotten their previous glory. They have always wanted to re-dominate the earth that once belonged to them. We, on the other hand, should atone for what we have done in the past. We should serve the birds as we serve our gods. We should return the world to them. SCP-1559-1-A: This is what the posters can tell people about. The mammals stole their world, and the birds are not asking too much for it. <End Log> Footnotes 1. Also known as SCP-1559-1. See below for detailed description.

SCP-380 is a small, blue box with an appearance not unlike an internet router.

*** Item #: SCP-380 Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: This object should be kept connected to a small computer in health lab H██, in the off position. The object may be disconnected and moved to any computer that is capable of an internet connection, but by the request of Dr. ████████, should never be attached to a computer with internet access. Description: SCP-380 is a small, blue box with an appearance not unlike an internet router. It has a single antenna, a few lights, a power switch and a single T3-line female connector. Although there is no plug for an outside source of electricity, SCP-380 will work when it is connected to a network-capable computer and the 'power' switch in the on position. The device seems to be compatible with any computer it is connected to (hereafter referred to as SCP-380-1), and will open a large network connection; low-performance computers are commonly unable to maintain said connection. Instead of wireless connections to other networked computers, however, the network is made up of biological entities within a 15-meter radius. Entities compatible with this network include but are not limited to humans, animals, and plants. As networked entities enter and leave the radius of connection, network connections are respectively formed and severed. Test subjects (and it is assumed all biological entities) are not aware that they are connected to a network. The only effect that is immediately obvious is the ability of SCP-380-1 to access biological components. When a biological component is accessed, it contains a single text document readable by whichever operating system is utilized by SCP-380-1. Each text document contains variables such as 'heart rate', 'stress', and 'blood glucose level' - among various other physiological parameters, demonstrating accuracy surpassing that of modern technology. Experiment 380-01: Attempts to edit any of the text documents kept in organic 'files' has responded with a message reading "ERROR 271: Data out of range.", and the loss of any changes made to the file. Experiment 380-02: Normal health monitoring devices have shown the numbers reflected from organic 'files' to be accurate and therefore should be accepted as true. Requests to research SCP-380 as a potential health monitoring device are pending.

SCP-270 is a nondescript black phone of mid-20th century make.

*** Item #: SCP-270 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: Due to SCP-270’s immovable nature, a structure has been built around it that outwardly appears to be a large farmhouse, henceforth called Outpost Delta. Outpost Delta is to be staffed with a minimum of ███ trained personnel. Extensive records of SCP-270’s ciphers are kept at Site-11. Extensive records of decoded ciphers are available in █-███, ██████. If the security of Outpost Delta is compromised, SCP-270 is to be destroyed, along with all on-base records of verified or unverified information accumulated, and manuscripts outlining various encryptions SCP-270 has used. Description: SCP-270 is a nondescript black phone of mid-20th century make. There were no human populations exceeding ██ people per ████ square meters within a █████ radius of the location of discovery, and SCP-270 itself was well hidden by surrounding native vegetation. The unusual properties of SCP-270 were apparent upon discovering that the power cord extended an indefinite length into the soil directly below SCP-270, despite which a steady voice was speaking through the earphone. Investigations regarding how long the cord is have since been officially discontinued (see Addendum 270-A). What makes SCP-270 of continued interest is the audio stream from the earphone, which has since been discovered to contain encrypted messages that are of value to the Foundation. Said ciphers are referred to as SCP-270-1. For the most part, SCP-270-1 consists of a mildly distorted human female voice (see Addendum 270-B) speaking in a steady monotone, which has been recorded listing names, cryptic phrases, patterns of numbers, quotes, mangled quotes, strings of letters, [DATA EXPUNGED] incomprehensible words, sounds that cannot be produced by any known animal that continue for extended amounts of time (███ unconfirmed languages have been distinguished to date, ██ of which are reoccurring), monologues, nursery rhymes, [REDACTED] leading to speculation as to whether or not the narrator is in fact human, etc. The following have also been recorded: melodies, periods of silence (see Addendum 270-C), metallic scraping noises, metallic scraping noises that have been looped and re-calibrated so they play roughly in the same tune as several classical music tunes and a handful of [DATA EXPUNGED], Morse code, [REDACTED] human screaming, various computer programming languages, every known language on earth (including, in one incident, Pig Latin), [DATA EXPUNGED] possibly of biological origin, condescending laughter, music, music played backwards, music [REDACTED], conversations that have evidently been recorded ranging from [REDACTED] politically significant and extensively protected area to what was most likely an average household, discussing what grocery supplies to buy from the supermarket, static, ambient soundtracks, etc. A demonstrative sample of SCP-270-1 can be found here. SCP-270 is otherwise a perfectly normal phone and is susceptible to damage as similar phones would be. Disassembly has not uncovered the source of SCP-270’s unusual properties. Speaking into SCP-270 has no effect on SCP-270-1. Currently disputed, refer to Incident-270-█ in which [DATA EXPUNGED]. Attempts to decipher SCP-270-1 have yielded partial successes. In one notable case, a complicated cipher proved to be an intensive description of an SCP-███’s imminent attempt to breach containment. Evidence of such was found in the [REDACTED] of SCP-███’s containment. Containment breach was accordingly prevented. Decoded portions have alternately been startlingly useful to the Foundation, and immensely frustrating to both personnel working on SCP-270-1 and Foundation officials. For example, one ██-hour study of what seemed to be a significant cipher proved to translate into a long and painstakingly thorough list of extremely unofficial synonyms for a human █████. Likewise, information gained from SCP-270-1 have both [DATA EXPUNGED] preventing a possible XK-class end-of-the-world scenario, and listed ‘secret ingredients’ of Dr. R█████’s widely praised cherry pie. As it is impossible to determine how useful portions of SCP-270-1 will be, personnel are advised to choose whatever segments of SCP-270-1 they deem to be most promising. However, some portions of cipher are either too intricately encrypted for our most perspicacious personnel to decode, or indeed may hold no meaning at all. Attempts to decode SCP-270-1 are continually ongoing (see Addenda 270-D and 270-E). Addendum 270-A: A probe was extended a total of █████ meters along the wire before the maximum extension length was reached. The matter has since been declared not of sufficient interest to merit a more thorough examination. Addendum 270-B: As of █/██/██, ████ military time, the unidentified female voice of SCP-270-1 stuttered for █ seconds before breaking down into what researchers described as ‘disconsolate sobs,’ pleading to be [REDACTED]. This continued for ██ seconds before audio cut off abruptly to a ██-minute excerpt of SCP-270-1 from ██/█/██. Immediately afterwards, SCP-270-1 proceeded as usual, the only noticeable difference being that the voice narrating SCP-270-1 was male. Addendum 270-C: Further examinations revealed that this was in fact not silence, but audio stimuli both too high or too low pitched for human perception. ███ additional unidentified languages have been discovered upon supplying Outpost Delta with appropriate audio equipment. Addendum 270-D: As of late, SCP-270-1 has been becoming noticeably more difficult to decode. This includes utilizing more convoluted methods of encryption, loud background noises being added while the narrator is speaking, multiple voices speaking at once, and, in one case, loud [REDACTED] extremely personal details [REDACTED] Dr. A████, who was visibly shaken by the event. Morale has since plummeted while stress levels have skyrocketed. A computer program has been coded in order to automatically decode portions of SCP-270-1. A recreation wing has been added to Outpost Delta. Addendum 270-E: Data Processor 270-1 has been discontinued. All attempts to electronically resolve portions of SCP-270-1 have thus far failed. . . . LEVEL 5 SECURITY CLEARANCE REQUIRED As of late, concerns have risen regarding the psychological states of personnel working on SCP-270. What I’m talking about, of course, are the natural issues that arise when you have a situation like this. Namely, putting a bunch of highly intelligent, motivated, tenacious people together and ordering them to solve a puzzle that may or may not have a solution. And telling them that lives may depend upon their success or failure. Recently, Dr. █████, by some superhuman effort, cracked ██ minutes’ worth of cipher that had been discarded by communal agreement as a ‘dud’ and [DATA EXPUNGED] resulting in the aversion of a ██ end-of-the-world scenario. This has not been beneficial for the mental states of many personnel, as every ‘dud’ they discard may contain information regarding an equally disastrous event. Since then, there have been rapidly emerging paranoia and/or obsession-related disorders. Some personnel are beginning to insist that the most trivial details of the cipher contain important messages, others have not slept or eaten in days in their pursuits, and still others have suffered from psychotic breakdowns. Outpost Delta has since been supplied with more personnel in an attempt to spread the workload more thinly. However, the effects of having a few days of diligent work crumble into a ‘dud,’ repeatedly, have proven to be an absolute disaster for morale and, at times, mental stability. Currently, we only have enough staff to decode roughly ██% of the cipher. So far, reassigning personnel after a ██-month stay at Outpost Delta, applying Class A amnestics, and returning them to work on 270-1 at the end of a ██-month period of low-pressure jobs has worked fairly well as a short-term solution. This, however, requires a rather large number of personnel to be continually circulating in and out of Outpost Delta to maintain the minimum amount of staff required to decode the greater portion of what comes out of SCP-270. In addition, long-term circulation through Outpost Delta has been shown to ingrain certain paranoid and obsessive mental behaviors that Class A amnestics don’t wipe clean. [DATA EXPUNGED] nature of SCP-270, this is exactly what it wants, if certain people are to be trusted [DATA EXPUNGED] disconcerting to said O5 member. [REDACTED] not in fact a method of safe communication between unknown entities, as originally hypothesized, but rather [DATA EXPUNGED]. I request for this matter to be discussed more in-depth sometime in the near future. -Dr. ██████